Not Another D&D Podcast - Adventure Book Theatre: Goosebumps - Secret Agent Grandma

Episode Date: July 21, 2023

Deep in the bowels of the 8-Bit Library, The Book Buds (and newcomer Jake Hurwitz) crack into R.L Stine's Secret Agent Grandma, a spooky, choose-your-own-adventure from the author's "Give Yourself Goosebumps" collection. Listener beware, you're in for a SCARE...ILY GOOD TIME!!Buy tickets to upcoming NaddPod Live Shows Here!---CREDITS:Sound Mixing and Editing by Trevor Lyon8-Bit Book Club Theme by Emily AxfordSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Welcome to Ape at Book Club, the only book club that makes you dumber. We are Dun Dun. Dun Dun. Dun Dun. We do this, I know. Yes, we are your Lord Lords, Brian Murphy, Emily Axford, Kaldel Tanner, joined by special guest, first time on the show. Jake Herwin.

Not first time. Thank you, sir. It's good to be back. Thanks for coming to me back again. Honorary Lord Lord for a day Yeah, I gotta say your presence here for the first time ever a day. It's given me it's given me goose It's there's a fresh First time for everything first time for everything first time having Jake on but also first time that we'll be doing a goose bumps adventure book

These were So first time that we'll be doing a goose bumps adventure book Whoa, I'm a little afraid Hey, I just realized you're right. This might be a little scary. It might be a little spooky. Should we all hold hands? It's a reader be where you choose the scare fuck so if we die it's your freaking fault Blood is on our hands. Whoa. I'm actually a little freaked out by the monster on the back of the book. Oh, yeah, I'm holding it up. So Jake can see it here. It's got three eyes and it is ripping off a grandma costume because this book

is called Secret Agent Grandma. Grandma. You know we love grandmas on this podcast. And we absolutely love grandmas on the spot. Especially tight ones, but they can be any size. Yeah, true. Tight ones and blast and grandma's. Well, I think the skin on this one is certainly tight

because it is a costume. Right. That grandma is long dead for sure. Oh, oh, Lord. And it's our fault. We chose this scare. All right. And monster skinned your grandma. Oh, oh, oh.

All right. Or her like a rooosh. What did you let this happen? Right off the bat. Oh, we've got beware. Do not read this book from beginning to end. No problem. We don't have time to do that.

Yes, mom and dad are out of town and your sweet old grandma is coming to take care of you. You are ready for freedom, but are you ready for grandma? Can I ask you guys a question? Because this was not an experience in my childhood when you get watched by your grandparents I'm familiar to experience me, which is why I ask when you get watched it doesn't feel like freedom It's a little more like the traditional grandparent experiences. They're spoiling you

They're bringing treats and sweets and they don't know all the rules They don't know all the rules or do they know and they just don't care Maybe they don't care. This is true They don't know all the rules. Or do they know and they just don't care. Maybe they don't care. This is true, they are old and wise and their bodies hurt. So maybe they're just letting them rule slide because they don't want to chase after you. My grandma experience was my grandma would come over and fall asleep at like seven p.m.

and then it was just the freaking Wild West. Whoa, so that is freedom. That is, that is, that's why I created this. It's not because she's sweet, it's because she falls asleep. Just staying up for play PlayStation all It's because she falls asleep. Just staying up so late, blazing all night. Just grandma fell asleep. Jake, your grandma experience? There were six of us.

So my grandma was over every single day. She was like a second mom. But my mom gave us no rules. I had freedom all the time. Okay, so your mother experience was freedom. My mother experience was a grandmother experience. So this grandma philosophy all the way down, incredible, yeah, complete chaos.

Well, we'll see if the grandma on this has the same philosophy, because she might be a secret agent grandma. I think she will be. I think we're gonna have a great time. Actually, I do believe my grandmother, she passed away, but she also worked for the CIA.

Wow, wow. So you're allowed to say it now. Yeah. I'm not blowing your cover. Actually, maybe she didn't pass away. All right. Well, guys, we simply have to read the third sentence. So we have to get through a sentence.

A grandmother's degree agent though, is so satisfied. OK. So she wasn't involved in any problem. You got a good answer. All right, ready? The terror starts. The shadow never comes. Two old ladies who both look exactly like your grandma. She wasn't involved in any problem at a cop position. All right, ready? The terror starts all the shadow gathered. Yeah, go ahead. Two old ladies who both look exactly like your grandma.

If you go after the grandma who is still on the train, you might end up battling aliens with eyes the size of ping pong balls, or jumping from a hovering helicopter. That seems like a normal size for an eye. If you go home. Yeah, me, you're right. Ping pong ball?

No, no, it's inside your head. I think it's about the size of a ball. I think Jigs right. No, it's like a little ball. It's not as big as the author means for it to be. Yeah, they're kind of big. I think the eyes of the other size of pink Bung balls. They're a little big.

No, it's pink by the size of a ball. Like a jaw breaker or maybe like a large marble. Maybe it's just a size of a pink Bung. I have cute Barbie doll eyes. Wow, you do. Everyone says that. Look at a beautiful doll eyes. It's true.

My sunken caveman eyes are the size of a marble. Doll eyes are like, isn't that as a line from like, jaws or something where the guys are like, oh, it's like a doll's eyes. It's like that. Yeah, doll eyes are famously like scary. I have a frightening chance. OK, anyway, blah, blah, blah.

If you go home with the other grandma, we have one piece of advice for you. Stay out of the Rose Garden. It's OK. Is it because you're going to get yelled at or their body's buried there? This is too much information right up top. Is this the Fort Word or the book?

This is the Fort Word. Fort Word. OK. The scary adventure is all about you. You decide what will happen. information right up top is this the forwarder the book this is the for okay Um this scary adventure is all about you you decide what will happen you decide how terrifying the scares will be start on page one and follow the instructions We know how this works uh blah blah, but if you make the wrong choice be where so take a deep breath cross your fingers and turn to page one to give yourself Goose bumps That sounded like a lazy obsidian from 20 miles. What if your goose bumps are too big? And they just like ping pong balls. No, that's way too big.

That's way too big. That's a problem. That's high. That's high. Nothing is going to happen to me. You shout down to your mother. She gazes up at you from the bottom of the stairs. Her packed suitcases sit waiting by the front door. You recognize that word. Look on her face. Do you remember everything I told you? She asks her forehead wrinkles and concern, or should

I write it down? Mom, I'm not a baby. You. Yes, I am mommy Neve me mommy we're gonna we're gonna strike Emily's character from the record She's not in this little sister Emily little sister Emily is cut out She's been ex-out from this you see a small child with dolls eyes hearing from the shadows He's so creepy. Okay. You plop onto the Emily you plop onto the top Step of the staircase repeat your instructions for the fifth time. I take a cab to the railroad station. I wait on the platform on the incoming side of the station. Grandma's train arrives at 1 p.m.

I'll know her by the yellow stretch pants and purple shirt she'll be wearing. Then if she hasn't been arrested by the... Oh, amazing color combination. Then wait, we got a spicy little comment. Then if she hasn't been arrested by the fashion police for wearing such a wacko outfit. Oh, yeah. Yeah, dude. Hard to agree. When I was a kid, every time I played

Mash, I wanted to get a purple limo with yellow polka dots or other way around. I don't remember which. Talking about the fashion police was very much a 90s insult. That happened all the time. 90s kids loved a judge. 90s kids based on their appearance. Always talked about calling the fashion. Anyway, don't make fun of your grandmother. Your mother cuts in.

She's unusual, but I'm sure you two will get along fine. What? What? Your mother better? Have they never met before? I don't know. They never met. You, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you,

you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, They never met he's gonna recognize her based on the outfit and not being his fucking grandma Really got some pictures grandma around how old are we in this old enough to take a cab to the train station Yeah, like 27. Yeah, but not only to recognize our grandma early 20s Little sister Emily Okay, mother's right your mother's. Your dad adds coming through the front door Your grandma's full of surprises. Yes, sure you think how was some little old lady going to surprise me go on to page two I know how books work are all stop. I will go from page one to page two

Your dad picks up the remaining two cases and heads back out to the car. Your mother doesn't move You flash her your most trustworthy smile. She sighs, I guess you'll be all right. She says, uncertainly. Of course I will, you assure her, what could happen? You follow your mom out to the car and wave as your parents drive away. The moment their car turns the corner, you leap into the air.

Freedom you cry. No parents for a whole week, just a 75-year-old grandma. She'll probably spend the whole time snoozing on the sun porch. You'll practically be on your own. The cab arrives and you hop in. You instruct the driver to take you to the train station, but as he nears the station, you have a pang of doubt.

You haven't seen your grandmother since you were a little kid. You wonder if you'll recognize her. What is going on in the fam? I don't know. And she's not that far away. I mean, it's just a train ride. Yeah, she's a train ride away. You haven't seen her kid.

A train ride and you haven't seen her in 20 years. Yeah, you haven't seen her in 20 years. Yeah, I mean I think grandma's got some baggage Considering there is an alien ripping off a grandma skin suit on the cover, so you know We'll see. Yeah, she's got her she's got a reason maybe grandma did time actually for you know for being arrested by the fashion police Okay, he met him literally for being arrested by the fashion police. Oh, okay. We ain't even considered that. He made it literally. He made it literally. We had the fashion police. Yeah.

She spent 30 years in a state and a country. Fashion, yeah. Yeah. Okay, you may not recognize Grandma's face. You tell yourself, but you'll definitely spot her purple and yellow outfit. Besides, you'll know you from photos. Your parents sent her so sad.

Why is the is going on? You pay the driver and hop out. Hey, that's weird, you think. Why was your name announced over the loudspeaker? You rushed to the information booth inside the station, wondering what could be wrong. You just paged me, you tell the young man in the booth, you've got a call, he ends you a phone.

Hello, there's a lot of static on the line. You can barely hear, but it's definitely your mom's voice. We're on the plane. Pfft. Home immediately. What? I can't hear you. You shot into the plane. Pfft. Home immediately. What? I can't hear you. You shot into the phone.

Do you want me to go home? What about grandma? Pfft. Danger. Pfft. Grandmother. Pfft. That's all you hear.

Then the line goes dead. Turn to page 108. 108. We didn't make a choice. Yeah, we didn't make a choice about what we did with the grandma. What choice would we have made there? We would have put a soft hand to the cheek of the man who gave us the phone and said,

what was your grandmother like? We're really pens of about not having a close relationship with that grandmother. We want to talk to strangers about it. It's either that or go to the vending machine. It was within the two options. Okay. As we go to the vending machine. I'm going to tell her about his grandma or go to the vending machine. Those are the two options. Okay. As we go to the vending machine. Tell everybody's grandma or go to the vending machine. All right, we're going to go to the vending machine. Great. As we grab a Mr. Goodbar.

Okay. So hot. A chill runs through you. What was your mother trying to say? Is your grandmother in trouble? Is there danger at the station? As you hand the phone back to the information clerk, the whole train station begins to rumble. Could this be what your mother was trying to warn you about? Should you get out of there and go home or are you supposed to find your grandmother? If you get out of there right away, turn to page 12. If you stay to find grandma, turn to page 33. Gotta get up and do our grandma.

We've never fucking met her. Why? I think it's clear that we have a bond to her. I've no time. I see. There's nothing driving me to rescue grandma. And Mr. Goodf Bar is melting very rapidly. We gotta get it home.

And yet after talking to the clerk about his relationship with his grandma, I am starting to wonder if maybe we have unresolved baggage with grandma. I feel like we need to go find grandma. I think we need to find her and ask her, where have you been for the last 20 years? We gotta make up for lost time. Yeah, yeah.

But if it doesn't go well, I'm going to call the fashion police on there. Okay, I'm going to snitch. Put fashion police on speed dial and then go confront grandma. Do you think she's writing like an ankle bracelet, like a really unfashionable ankle bracelet? Where is it so fashionable? Because they're trying to make her fashionable.

Anyway, so we're gonna go to page 33 because we are gonna to make her fashionable. Anyway, so we're gonna go to page 33 because we are gonna try to find grandma. Okay, okay. I think we are. You can't go home without grandma. You can't go home without your grandma because you had to confront her. Even if you feel as if you're in the middle of an earthquake, you clutch the information counter to keep from falling over. You smile at the cleric hoping to mask your fear. Ah! Ah! Ah! That just smiling at someone during an earthquake.

Just saying, Ramaz, am I right? And they're just unraddled sitting there, yeah. Being afraid to show your fear during an earthquake. Don't let the ticket take your seat. Well, blah, a train coming. The Claire conforms you, shouting over the noise. Every time one comes in, this old station rattles like a baby's toy.

I knew that, you fibbed. Mommy. I've got a 20 year old sister. I know. I knew that, you fibbed. You really did, old. You hope the clerk doesn't notice how white your knuckles are. The rattling stops with a loud screech of the bracelet.

We really care about what the clerk does. We really want the clerk to do this. It's cool, not scared. It's full of that 90s teen angst of being like, I wasn't scared. Yeah. The rattling stops with a loud screech of bracing. You make your way out onto the platform

just as the door is to the train open. Mops of people push their way out the door, scan the crowd searching for an old lady in yellow pants, a purple shirt, no luck. Hey, what are you doing here, a voice calls, turn to page four. Okay, we still don't make a choice. What choice would we have made there?

I wanna know. I think we would have leaned in. WD40 on the rails, because that's so sneaky. That's good. Oh, okay. We probably should have bit our finger really hard to see if it would bleed, to see if we're in a dream or not. Oh, I was thinking we lean in to test the waters with the clerk

Kiss see if the chemistry that word detecting is there Do you want to split this good bar? Okay, um mr. Good bar for a bad boy Okay for a bad boy. I'm sorry. Okay, for a bad brod. So things are weird. You're surprised to see your friends Chuck and Ginny running towards you. Okay, Ginny, wait, this is crazy. We're about to go somewhere with a nap and lady on a sun porch and have free

radio to for hours. Chuck and Ginny are here in this fucking rules that this is you must go beers. That's really cool. That's really hard, that's really hard. We are 24. We're young professionals now. Two and a half years at a Skidmore College. That's right, Jiny's in med school.

I can't believe you made it. Okay, you're surprised to see your friends Chuck and Jiny rushing towards you. Hey guys, you great them. I'm here to meet my grandmother. How about you? We're going to the hockey game. Remember, Chuck tells you I invited you. You guys, you greet them. I'm here to meet my grandmother. How about you? We're going to the hockey game. Remember, Chuck tells you I invited you.

You remember, you couldn't go because of grandma's arrival. Our moms are letting us take the train on our own. Ginny ads, of course they are. You're 27. Yeah. Of course, we had to promise to stay out of trouble, Ginny giggles, as if three Huskies beers. I would like to have five Jenny. You I five Jenny.

Unfortunately, my aunt is still bleeding for when I bid it earlier. But that's convenient because she is in med school. Oh yeah, she'll stitch that right up. Yeah, replace it with a doll finger. Back off sister. Have fun with grandma Chuck Teesas. They board the train. You sigh gelously as you scan the thinning crowd. Still no grandmother. Is this what your mother had been trying to tell you that your grandmother wasn't coming after all? Grandma always does.

This is why we haven't seen grandma in 20 years. She says she's gonna come and then she does. That's what you think. Do you think that mom and dad went to a grandma's will reading and they were like trying to hide the fact that grandma's dead? Shit, yeah. I think grandma's at the hockey game. Yeah, I think grandma's the hockey game

Oh, I think we're playing at the hockey game grandma's the goal is right. No actually secret agent She's a hockey agent. She's signed That makes sense because she wants to just enjoy a hockey game scout some people without everyone mugging to her right You know like all the hockey players trying to do a cool trick right in front of her. Because they're always trying to do that. He turns tape at. Yeah, how you get signed is you know a cool trick. Pro hockey players suck ass unless they're trying

to impress one agent and then they get good. The games are terrible in an agent. Yes, it's a cluster of men doing tricks in front of one person. It's like figure skating though. Yes, yes, I'm thinking about it. It's all adding up. doing tricks in front of one person. It's like figure skating though. Yes, yes, I'm thinking about it. It's like they would play international games. So this would be the perfect cover

for her to investigate international crimes if she's playing as a hockey player. Oh my god. Agent, double o hockey sticks. Whoa. So you're about to leave the station when you hear something that stops, who knew tracks, something terrible.

What makes your blood run cold? Find out on page 86. so this is not a true It's on the rails probably just another train going by because you're such a coward that every time fucking the ground rumbles a little bit Why are you fucking railroading us man? Literally Stationing us. RL style so it stands for real. A real sign. Real sign.

Real road love road. Yeah. Yeah, this is definitely not a choose your own adventure. It's just an out of order book, I guess. It's just read the pages in a different order. Okay, page 86. Cookie, cookie over here. You shutter it hearing your old nickname.

Oh. It's like grandma. You knowudder at hearing your old nickname. Oh! It's like grandma. You know how grandma's are just like not cool and they're always calling you cookie? Yeah. My grandma called me booby. Really? Really?

Yeah. And it was this weird thing where she just did it and like I was four so I didn't have a say in it. And it just, and it just, and it just, and it just, and it just, and your parents ever have to be like, hey, hey, that's the name's Alex. You know that right? Yeah. Of calling him booby. And booby tenors kind ever have to be like, hey. Hey, that's the name's Alex. You know that right. I'm calling him booby-tener's kind of cool.

We're calling him booby. No. Booby-tener. Don't call me huby-booby. Don't call me huby-booby. At least that we're at Kate from. I don't think so at all. I think that like I was the first grand kid

and she just like was trying something out. Just like yeah. And then she never drive for any other rest of them because she know. Yeah. And I didn't want to be rude. Okay. I don't know how I feel about this.

Yeah. Booby, booby over here. You shut her out here in your old nickname. You hate that name. Luckily, Murf and Emily aren't around to hear it. Booby, you turned toward the voice. At the end of the station, you see a woman with white hair.

She's waving wildly. No way to mistake her for anyone else, not in those clothes. You wave back approaching her cautiously. Anyone who would call you booby is likely to pinch your cheeks too. Oh, okay. Don't pinch my cheeks, I'm 29 years old. I know. They're full of good bar and dips bit.

As you stroll down the platform tread so carefully Something catches your eye right red letters Throw all across one of the train windows a message if your mother had it made that strange phone call You wouldn't have thought twice about it, but now you have an odd feeling maybe the message is meant for you Read the message on page 100. I we don't get to choose anything Alright, I mean I'm enjoying the story. Yeah Learning so much. I'm looking forward to making the decision.

Okay, there's a choice. There's a choice coming up. Okay, attack her. Okay, do attack her? Yeah, let's attack. Don't easily break a bottle and clutch it in our hands. Okay, yeah. We break a bottle.

You guys at the train window, you read the red letters aloud. Empla, empla, you mutter. What does it mean? It doesn't sound familiar. Maybe it's not an English word. The terrible nickname interrupts your thoughts. Boobie, I'm waiting for a big hug and kiss.

Exactly what you were afraid of. Hi, grandma. You stopped several inches away from her just beyond her reach. Wrong, grandma throws her arms around. You squeezing you hard. So hard, you can barely breathe. Finally, she releases you. Yes.

Is this such a different form of grandparents than than I've like ever heard of this like embarrassing grandparent I think again this is I guess calling you booby yeah well I think that we're a big bears booby but no my grandma was sweet demure never pitch me well again I think this is like we're a cool 24-year-old we just saw our friends go into the hockey game like we don't want to be caught deadold. We just saw our friends go into the hockey game. Like we don't want to be caught dead getting caught by a grandma. That's true, okay. I think most people aren't embarrassed of their grandmas.

I think it's more just 90s kids. Just wait in the comments below. Your parents. In fiction. Are you embarrassed of your loving grandparents? Yeah. Grandma hugs you. Caps are at the other end of the station.

You gasp trying to catch your breath. Grandma follows you chattering all the way. She asks about your school, your parents, and your mother's rose bushes. On the way out, we were warned. Yeah, we were warned. She's talking to you. But you know, what could an alien want to do with rose bushes?

Um, just eat them. Eat them. Yeah, eat the thorns. Yeah, eat the thorns. Specifically the thorns. On the way out of the station, you pass the train window with a message again. I've got it, you think. I know the Thorns. Yeah, the Thorns. Specifically the Thorns. On the way out of the station, you passed the train window with a message again. I've got it, you think.

I know what it means. Do you really, if you know what it says, turn to page 14, if you need help to figure it out, turn to page 129. Okay, this is our first choice. The message is EMPLA. EMPLGH. EMPL.

Oh, help me. It's, yeah, it's what, yeah, quits, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Help me, help me. Help me, yeah, help me. It's, yeah, it's, yeah, it's, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, it's, help me, help me. Help me, help me, help me. Okay, so if you know what it says, turn to page 14. We did. So we know what it says.

You know what the letter spell, it's so simple that you laugh at yourself for not getting it sooner. E-M-P-L-E, whoever wrote the message on the inside of the window didn't realize it would be read backwards on the outside. E-M-P-L-E, help me written backwards, you say it out loud.

What did you say, dear? Grandma asks, do you need help with something? You're about to tell her about the message when something you see inside the train stops you. Stir past the letters on the window and into the compartment. Your eyes widen, you blink several times. Take a step closer to the window. Your nose precipitates the glass. You don't believe what you're seeing. What else you glued to the train window? Find out on page 98. No choice. Absolutely no choice. Absolutely no choice. My God, this is all just out of order. I see the next thing.

Okay, you guys are the startling scene through the window inside the train compartment. A woman struggles fiercely with two men. The men wear tan overcoats in large dark sun glasses. Are they fashionable? This is the fashion police. Oh, the fashion police. It's the fashion police.

Crazy. Did the suits look bespoke? They do. But it's a woman who holds your attention. A white hair, a woman wearing yellow stretch pants in a purple shirt. She's a dead ring did the suits look bespoke? They do, but it's a woman who holds your attention. A white-haired woman wearing yellow stretch pants in a purple shirt. She's a dead ringer for your grandma. The two men yank her under each arm and lift her out

of the seat. Her terrapod eyes lock onto yours as she's dragged roughly into the aisle. The men pull her shoes door at the front of the car. The fashion police are abducting our grandma. Okay, we have to hurry to page 54. Great. Okay.

Don't waste any time. There's no time for choices. It's something wrong, her voice asks. Behind you, you turn and face your grandmother standing on the platform. She and the woman on the train could be twins. What's going on? Is this woman really your grandmother

or is your real grandmother in terrible trouble on the train? Shouldn't we be getting a taxi, booby? You stare at her. Could you have made a mistake? aboard the conductor shouts the train lets out an exhausted wee's then Slowly pulls forward you could jump on the train now and find out if the woman in danger is a real grandma Or you could assume the woman standing in front of you as the right woman after all she recognized you and you didn't get a good Look at the woman on the train. It's not okay. We got to go after the woman on the train Yeah, yeah, so other one is calling us booby.

Yeah, that lady on the train is our grandma, but I'm also not super compelled to jump on the train. Like I'm down to hang out. I think I want to get both grandma's together. You guys, two grandma's, are you kidding me? Oh, imagine the amount of cheek kisses you're gonna be getting. I think also like the way if we put ourselves

into the minds that is being described to us by Stein, we are embarrassed in this situation. We are 90s cringe with an exclamation mark. So I think we want to get out of this situation. We want to jump on and help. So I'm seeing our little green background mom. I just want to point out that we actually told our mom that we would stay out of trouble. So I don't feel great for a very good thing to hear.

Is there a metric for that in the book, Murph? Like do you need to roll something? I, yeah. What do you think the answer to that is? It has me a dice. Yeah, okay. So it's like a D6 system, and if we roll like four or above, that means that like, we respect our mother.

So I'm rolling a dice. Okay. What is this for? 17 17 we respect our mother don't get in trouble We can do whatever we want 17 was our wisdom saving throw to not just a bear mother Okay, so are we getting on the trainer? Are we not getting on the I think let's get on the train Okay, because we're embarrassed and maybe on the train There's like a beverage car and we can get a nice cherry coke

Nice 90s cherry Because we're embarrassed and maybe on the train there's like a beverage car and we can get a nice cherry coke. Refreshing for this nice, far summer day. Nice 90s cherry coke. We're in the 90s and we're snack motivated. Okay. I need to ask everyone else. Okay, let's run onto the train and scream, where the fuck are the launchables? You have to find out if that woman in trouble is your grandmother besides you're dying to find out why those men in dark glasses were fighting with a little old lady

and having such a hard time. The train starts to pull out of the station. You race down the platform, searching for a good spot to jump aboard. Your legs and arms pump hard. Your muscle straining as you match the speed of the train. Booby, come back here. What are you doing, grandma's voice floats after you?

If I'm wrong, you. This is so heroic. We are keeping pace with the train right now. Yeah, yeah. But I mean, we're in our mid-20s. So yeah, we're kind of yeah, we're on. We're we also did track and feel that Yeah, we haven't lost the We still run Marathons

If I'm wrong, you think in the woman on the train isn't my real grandma. I'm gonna be in big trouble But you're not going to back out now. You take a deep breath and leap. Will you make it? Turn to page 64. It's a leap of faith that we can repair our relationship with our grandma. Right. I got a nine to make it. We fall under the train tracks. No. We break nine balls. We get run over via train and never find out which we'll grab. It says booby on our tombstone. I never buy a train and never find out which to build a gravel bus. It says booby on our tombstone.

Yeah. The rules are, if whatever family member you're with, has to bury you right there. Your parents don't gonna say that. They talk to the engraver. Yeah, yeah, grandma's gonna talk to the engraver. You land on the small platform between train compartments. You flare your arms as you struggle to regain your balance.

Once you feel steady on your feet, you flee in the door open. Everyone starts at you as you enter the car. You nervously run a hand. Through your hair, you try to regain your balance. Once you feel steady on your feet, you flee in the door open. Everyone starts that you as you enter the car, you nervously run a hand. Through your hair, you try to act as if jumping to the car. So moving train is the most natural thing in the world. All right, ego is so fresh. Just a 90s attitude. Everybody's cool.

Oh my god. Everything's cool. There's nothing wrong with society. Everything's great. There are no problems yet. You have a feeling you're not very convincing you hurry into the next car The struggling woman was several cars ahead you head through the swaying train planning to pick up the woman's trail from where you'd last Seen her, but maybe you're in over your head those dudes in dark glasses look to dangerous

Maybe you need help the fashion please. Okay, if you think you should tell someone what you saw turn to page 70 If you follow the woman's trail yourself turn to page 80 Trail by ourselves. Yeah, trust adults. We can't show weakness if we ask for help But are our friends on this train or were they on a different one? Oh good call Yeah, the thing is is that if we talk to people though anyone could be undercover fashion, please that's true I think we were I That's this question. Do we have a cool no fear shirt on? Uh-huh.

Uh-huh. We have a cramped up piece frog shirt. We have a cramped up piece. Okay. Janko shorts that are so long, they're practically full-size jeans. Yeah. They're tattered at the bottom and you're like, how did this happen? Yeah.

Our Birken socks have not been worn in yet. Our feet are chafed. Shit, we have firm birks on. Yeah, we have some. The fashion police could have come from us. These frogs cropped up. The fashion police could come for us for having ripped a bunch of the bottom of the jankos from wearing them the rain. That's just a warning from the fashion police.

I don't think you go in for that. So I actually think we look fantastic. I think we also have a freshly pierced belly button ring. Oh, yeah. Shit, do we have the alcohol to put on that? Because we have to go to the laboratory and do that. It's like dangling a happy face. Oh man, so we just changed the stud then. We just didn't do a dangly smiley face. This is actually, we're such a fashion icon. This is what those Walmart commercials were based on,

where the little happy faces bouncing around in the 2000s. Based on our belly button. We got firm perks and we're a former 25th. Just out of college. Okay, so should we tell someone or or do we wanna just follow the trail? And we're wearing a Skidmore bucket hat. Okay, so I'm sure. I think we should apply some cherry lip gloss,

and I think we should look for our grandma. Okay, so we're just gonna follow the trail. Slather on the Dr. Pepper lip pop chapstick. I only wanna tell Chuck and Jenny, but if it's like, if we can't guarantee that, then I... I think I want Chuck and Jenny to see us being cool. Oh, good call.

We do wanna impress them. Because we are kind of fighting for Jenny's love with Chuck. We have no where to go. We really got something going on with another one. Chuck was gonna try something at the hockey game. I know it. I know it.

I know it. Fuck Chuck. Yeah, why do you think Chuck got two tickets only two right? Well, he said we could he got three, but he knew grandma was coming this day Yeah, yeah, that's so smooth Chuck you play that so smooth Chuck you fucking piece of There's like so many little like in between sections in a hockey game I got to run that San Boney all the time. There's gonna be so much opportunity Okay, well we- So Jenny, like how's med school?

She did, now that I think about it, he was wearing a ribbed sweater. And it had, and it had buttons at the shoulder. Is it a turtle that feels? Was it a turtle that? The thing is, is that Jenny is so busy with med school. She doesn't have time for relationships. I don't even know why Chuck's trying.

Ah. All right, you have a funny feeling. No one would believe know why Chuck's trying. Ah! Ah! Alright. You have a funny feeling, no one would believe you. If you said you have twin grandma's and ones in trouble on the train. It's not that unbelievable. You're not even truly... Yeah, really, isn't that that big of a wrap? Yeah, grandma's gonna have twins too.

Yeah, I'm gonna have to explain the twin part. Yeah, yeah. The thing is, my grandma's in trouble. Yeah, you said it. I left my other grandma at the time. Yeah, even if you said one of my grandma's is in trouble, that would be a perfectly normal statement. Yeah.

Okay, anyway, you're not even sure if you believe you. You're overthinking it, but. You decide to investigate on your own. You know, I hope that other grandma wasn't our real grandma because we definitely just left grandma at the train station and apparently she can't get a cab herself because we had to go pick her up. Yeah.

So grandma is abandoned at the train station. Maybe we shout to the teller that we had a connection with that watch after my grandma. Okay, so we yelled that out the window. Let's go ahead and roll a persuasion check. If you don't mind. We have a plus three

because of our no fear shirt and our jacket. 14. 14, okay, this is 17. I've been odds knowing. She can't carry a wallet because of her skin-tight leggings. You continue through the moving train. You arrive at the compartment with the messages in the window. It's smeared, but traces of the red letters are still there. You aren't crazy, after all.

You search the seat for clues, a lost wallet or luggage, anything to prove the woman's identity, but you find nothing. You get to the door at the far end of the car and reach for the handle. A heavy hand lands on your shoulder. Where do you think you're going? A gruff voice demands. Uh oh, grandpa. Who has you such a strong grip? Quick, flip to page 89. Is it grandpa? Oh shit. Or is it Chuck?

Oh, Chuck is like, hey. I'm gonna roll to see how many time agochies we found. 10! We've out 10! I mean, all of gonna roll to see how many time of Gachi's we found. 10. We've got 10. I mean, all of it need to be fed right now. Gachi's everywhere. Yeah, there's so much poop on these screens. You wriggle out of the hand's grasp and spin around.

The train get Dr. Glare's down at you. Strange, you think he's wearing dark glasses, but what he says isn't strange at all. Ticket, please. Oops, you forgot about needing a ticket. Now what? If you stall while you try to figure out a way out of the situation maybe tell him like look I'm sorry I've been separated from my parents. I'm 24 and I just graduated. It's good more college

I think we should say grandpa. I didn't know that you were a train conductor. That's awesome. Okay, my other grandmother Not the one that you're married to right somewhere on this train, but a twin your sister in law. Yeah you're married to right somewhere on this trail, but a twin, your sister-in-law, yeah, somewhere here. You could show them the student ID. Oh, that's a good call. I mean, you graduated last year, but your picture still looks like so. So let's all of these things that we're saying,

let's try to get rid of them. Although in the student ID, we don't have the belly button piercing, the smiley face belly button piercing, which might be a dead giveaway Okay, so all of these things that we said Let's try to narrow those down into what that could mean In regards to the two actual choice. We know we're doing but just like could you reiterate the offense?

So if you stall while trying to figure out a way to get out of the situation turn to page 21 If you explain to the conductor the real reason you're on the train, turn to page 92. He's our grandpa, he'll understand. Okay, that's reason enough for me. The sunglasses. These sunglasses. Yeah. Train conductors shouldn't wear sunglasses because they kind of need to be able to see the

real. That's what it goes clearly. Yeah. So he's clearly our grandpa. He's the secret agent grandpa. He's the M.I.B. Oh, right. I think if we explain the real situation, he'll be our grandpa, secret agent grandpa. He's really M.I.B.'s. Oh, right.

I think if we explain the real situation, he'll be like, you know about the alien we're trying to grab. Oh, and then we can, because we've been kind of floundering in our job at the art gallery, because we miss our days at Skidmore. So,

A lot of like vertical growth there. Exactly, so maybe we can become an alien Hunter right yeah, yeah, the truth. Yeah, so we tell him the truth So you want to try and become an MIB okay? All right cool. I think it is the test all right, so we're gonna tell Conduct to the real reason start by saying that we're floundering at the arch I'm not really a passenger on the train. You tell the conductor,

I would like to be an M.I.B. Could have fooled me, the conductor responds. I mean, that is, you're having trouble explaining. Yes, this I have to hear, the conductor crosses his arms and peers down at you. I saw this fight, a woman struggling with two guys in sunglasses, and I think the woman was my grandma. Also, it was a metaphor for how I feel about my job at the art gallery. Also, it's a metaphor for how I feel about my job at the art gallery.

Also, it was a metaphor for how I feel about my job at the art gallery. I've been hanging on to college and all my friends are really busy with bed school. I think I'm in love. And Chuck is going to make a move on Ginny today and I can't live in a world where it worked. Chuck's doing so good at the firm. Did you see two 24-year-olds making out of that call? By the way, if you did, don't tell me. If you do, okay.

You're swapping devil's jerseys. You're grandma in a brawl to conduct her snorts and disbelief. But it's true you cry. It's no use. He grabs your sleeve and yanks you to the door. That's the worst excuse for not paying a fair that I've ever heard, he declares. He lifts you up under the armpits

and lowers you to the platform. Oh, be careful, I'm wearing a crop top. Luckily, the train hasn't picked up much speed yet. You only stumble a few steps. So he throws you off the train. You're responsible. Booby, your furious grandmother marches towards you. What's gotten into you?

Jumping on and off, moving trains. That's in your grounded. So what? Some way to start a vacation. Grounded. You can't wait until your grandmother's visit comes to end. And oh brothery. That's the end.

Wait, why? We're in a little trouble. It's a little bit. It's over. It's over. We got grounded. That's what happens in the 90s. That's the worst thing that can happen? Because it's already over. It's over. It's over. It's over. It's over. It's over. It's over.

It's over. It's over. It's over. It's over. It's over. It's over. It's over. It's over.

It's over. It's over. It's over. It's over. It's over. It's over. It's over. It's over.

It's over. It's over. It's over. It's over. It's over. It's over. I have just sit in there while no one buys anything and tend to the business cars. Yes, although the pieces are just Artists as far as I care you can just get fired from the art gallery Because they don't pay me It's the best thing it happens to me grandma. I lose our internship at the art gallery I forgot what page we were on to go back and try something new. Yeah, what what points we want? Because we're trying to stall I think what we were trying to do was stall. We should have not told the truth, I guess.

Because I was basically teaching you a lot. Here's what I'm wondering if we, because we weren't supposed to tell the truth to that MIB. Especially, you know what? Because like I said, like I said, and also all of our actions have been ashamed of our feelings that every go.

So like the logical move for this character that we are would be to hide our emotions, would be to not trust anyone. Because we don't trust anyone because our grandma left when we were younger. And now she's coming back into our life. How can we trust her again? Exactly.

We can't even tell the clerk that the sound of a loud train startled us. We need to be, we need to be shifty at all costs all the time. Trust no one. We have to get a 90's. We've bottled up like the axe body spray. We're spraying all over ourselves.

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You won't want to take your burdogs off. We promise you. Okay, that's it for me. Go team pants and enjoy the show. Okay, so I think we're supposed to stall to try to find, figure out a way to explain the situation. So we can cop by the M.I.B. Okay, we're telling you we don't know what they are.

Because here's what I think. I'm going to make a guess here by the M.I.B. And we pretend we don't know what they are. Because you know what I think. I'm gonna make a guess here, story prediction. Okay. I think Chuck and Ginny are gonna see us while we're stalling and they're gonna be like, we have your ticket because you didn't say whether or not you could come to the hockey club. That's great. This is tight. Oh!

Hot Ginny's gonna say that and then Chuck is gonna be seething in the background. Yeah, he's gonna punch a window when it's gonna be. Yeah. Okay. We do the Makarena for 10 full minutes as a distraction. Hey, Macarena. Oh, I... Ticket, you repeat, you smile up at the conductor. Can full minutes.

He doesn't smile back as you do the Macarena. What? He, Macarena, this was fun. He wouldn't have thought for like four years ago, my dude. Um, he doesn't smile back. You spot Chuck and Ginny entering the compartment. Great. Hi, I was looking for you, you dark past the conductor and join your friends.

He wants to see my ticket you explain. What is Chuck like right now? Chuck? I think we were saying was wearing a ribbed turtleneck turtleneck. He's not over like the Z-Look Pist. Yeah, he's furious. Gotta be steamed. He looks, he's trying to hide it.

He has a plastic smile on, but his eyes look devastated. What does Danny look like though? Does she seem happy to see us? She looks kind of intrigued. Ah, dressed out from Ed's school though. Looks like she doesn't have time for a relationship. Whoa. She looks at you, gets excited, and then avoids your gaze

because let's face it, she can't get close to you. She's too busy with meds. Right. And I want to stand in the way of her dreams. and then avoids your gaze because let's face it, she can't get close to you, she's too busy with meds for work. Right. And I wanna stand in the way of her dreams. Yeah. I palm her business card for the card. You're right.

Why is she at the business card? I don't know, I feel like our gallery's at business card. Oh, our own, our own. Well, the one that we work for. I know you said her business card. I need a business student. I'm not a business student. our own our own well the one that we work for I know you said her business car needs a student have a and it's one of those art galleries that only

sells like the picture of like the blue dog we're thinking of giving I still don't understand so you're thinking of giving Jenny your business card we want to have a picture of the gallery yeah and it has the gallery the gallery owner's name right your email is assisted to You want to press her? This is part of the gallery. Yeah, and it has the gallery, the gallery owner's name. So what?

Right, your email is assisted to Richard at Mitchell Gallery. What's your friend? Why do you need to give her your, your boss's show? They were a professional. But she knows we're a college friend. We're the three muskabeers. It's just a move.

Okay, we're making sure I can move so many guys make moves. I do not just a move. Okay, we're making sure it's making so that he got a fake move. I do not get the move. Here's the thing, Murf. When she flips the business card over, she's going to see our phone number, our page or number. We, she has our number. We just got to page her, Murf.

Okay, we got to page, we got, we got, we got to page her just for people who want a bone. We have two pages now. Okay, we have room for it in our chainco, and you know what we toss her a couple time ago She's okay. Holy shit. You guys are gonna get excited about this one Yeah, if you weren't always late you would have your ticket Ginny scolds then she winks at you Stop right there. Stop right there. We have the best

Now now do you regret popping? I guess not yeah, it takes the business card and looks impressed and wings again With both eyes. Yeah, that's right epic give her a second business card because it works so well the first time We give her a second business card. I think we're doing like magicians tricks. Yeah. Who this is? Someone else's business card. Jenny, you were about to bone down on an assistant curator.

That's right, Chuck tells the conductor. My mom is picking us up in Evan's town. She'll pay when we arrive. We promised our parents we wouldn't get into trouble. Jenny, gushes. You want to gushes? Gushes. Please don to go... Gushes. Please don't tell the demon in my medical school.

I think her gushing is over our magic trick. Which is eating gushes. It is eating gushes. It is the 90s. Yeah, she makes like a, sound as she chomps down on a gusher and it squirts everywhere with the execution of our third magic trick. You want to gag, but Ginny's act works.

Three muskabca beers strike again. Yes. Whoa. The three Musca drink beers, right? That's pretty good. That's good. It's getting away from it for sure, but. We take out a cooler and we cheer ourselves up.

We brought it, yeah, we, we brought a cooler to wait for our grandma. Hey, fun for all and all for fun, all right? Yes. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah. Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!

Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!

Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!

Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Yi! Ah! Ah! What was that about Chuck demands? Why are you on the train? Are you supposed to be with your grandmother? He stews Tell them about the strange scene you witnessed the woman might be my real grandma you exclaim you have to help me search the train Ginny and Chuck gaze at each other. No way Chuck be gay why do they gaze at each other? I don't know wait wait wait Gaze Gaze at each other. Yeah wait is Chuck just gazing at her so intensely that it looks like both of them are gazing but actually, Ginny's in her own thoughts about-

I hate to break this, you guys. Wait, did it say the chuk gays did Ginny? Yeah. Chuk gays did Ginny and Ginny was lost in her own thoughts about my school. They sure it says, at each other? Guys, you have to accept that there's some chemistry there and this isn't just a slam dunk.

I don't think Ginny has decided yet though. I gotta be honest, it is the hottest situation that Jenny has chemistry with both of us. She has chemistry with both of us. And I think there's just- And of course she'd be good at chemistry. She's a traction to Chuck. I think what she has with us is deeper.

Yeah, but unfortunately again, there any history there? She's in med school. Did they hook up when they were in Saratoga Springs is what I wanted. We have this in art gallery position. We're in so much time. She's a basketball. We have a situation. Did you guys? Art gallery position. We have so much time. She has time for a fling with Chuck.

Okay. No, Chuck's so busy at the firm. We exactly, Chuck is busy at the firm, which is why they can have a fling and understand each other. We are, let's face it, we're kind of in our feelings right now. Okay, I put. Because of all this stuff at the art gallery. I put.

I put. I put my hand on Jenny's cheek and I say, a lawyer and a doctor is too cliche. A doctor and an assistant curator. No, that's a story I'd read. And I lean in for a kiss. Amazing. Go to that page. Yeah.

And then you lean in for a kiss. Did you say, I found something behind your ears before on another business. And this one, it's a magic gathering card. And this one, it's a magic gathering card. You lean in for a kiss. Did you say I found somethingimmore one time? Be honest. Have they not yeah? Fuck was it the summer we were abroad? Yes, fuck fuck Gotta be honest, Ginny. That's not the answer I wanted But it's maybe the one you needed to Okay, I guess I can think about grandma now that I'm avoiding thinking about Ginny great

Okay, I guess I can think about grandma now that I'm avoiding thinking about Ginny. Great. We should explain all those AIM away messages. Great, you cry. You quickly explain that you were about to check out the train cars in the direction the men dragged your grandma or the grandma and pasta or whoever. What are we waiting for, Chuck Urges? Let's go. He's so assertive.

Yeah, he's trying to impress Ginny, but it's my fucking grandma. Yeah, actually, he kind of tried to poo poo the idea and then she like took up the mantle and now he's acting like it's his idea. Yeah, Chuck doesn't have a lot of a personality. I don't know. Can I say, can I whisper it as ear? I see through you. I'm like a business car.

I see through you. So it's on the other side. You pull a business car from mine this year. And then the business car on the back side? People who have business card from mine is here. Ha ha ha. And I'm a business card on the back. It says she's mine. I'm in your head, rent free. You bought your own business card. Adivis head.

Ha ha ha. Buy your own, you mean Richards. Thank you, I'm your owner. Are you sure of what you saw, Ginny asks? I mean, why would two tough guys go after somebody's grandmother? Maybe it was just a coincidence that the two ladies who were in the same clothes chuck ads. No, I know what I saw, Ginny asks, I mean, why would two tough guys go after somebody's grandmother? Maybe it was just a coincidence that the two ladies were wearing the same clothes Chuck ads. No, I know what I saw you insist, but inside you wonder the same thing.

You arrive at the last car on the doors of yellow sign with large black letters. No entry. Notice Ginny and Chuck exchange a worried look. Before you can change their minds about helping you, you yank open the door through of you pylons at the car. You gasp, stunned by the shocking sight in front of you, turn to page 50. Oh my God. Okay. Okay, you've entered the baggage compartment, but luggage isn't what has the three of you frozen in your place.

Your eyes are wide. Your grandmother sits on a chair surrounded by circumstances. Package compartment, you mean my fucking life? Yeah. What's unpacked? Another way. We found out about that college hook up in the game.

Let's get it out. How did it happen? Why didn't you guys tell me? I stole some to Cate's from the bar. Let's get into this. Your grandma keys straight ahead, unblinking. A strange orange light beams down onto her. She doesn't move.

And although her eyes are open, she doesn't seem to see you. Is she, you know, Ginny Stammers? I can't tell you you reply. I think she's alive. But I know a way to find out. Chuck says he jumps up and down, puts his fingers up his nose and howls and grandma's ear. God, he's a wild man.

He's an absolute wild man. Yeah, thanks. Ginny is a doctor. I think she can look at grandma. Yeah, Chuck. No, is that any way for a 25 year old to act? He's also, he was a year ahead of us. Yeah, he was a year ahead of us.

Yeah, which was kind of weird, because he like just lived off campus for like two years after. Just like to hang out before he went to the firm. Yeah, he had all the great earnings. He's a f**king gap year this guy. Yeah, you know. No reaction from... No reaction from grandma.

You swallow hard. Wait, she is alive, Jenny murmurs, creeping closer. I can see her breathing. Med's student of course you would know. The one doesn't she say something you were allowed? Maybe she's under some kind of spell, Jenny Whisperce. Maybe it's the weird light, Chuck suggests. That is a classic med student thing to say.

Maybe she's under some kind of spell. Yeah, she's diagnosing. Yeah, I do like the triage. Yeah, most doctors like wouldn't even allow like magic as a possibility. That really just shows how open-minded Jenny is. Jenny's so cool. Maybe it's the possibility that really just shows how open-minded Jenny is. Jenny's so cool. Maybe it's the weird light Chuck suggests.

He waves a hand onto the orange beam. Pow, Chuck's body flies across the railroad. Amazing. You look like a crumpy. We pretend not to know it. We pretend not to know it. We quietly go, yes. Find out if Chuck is okay on page 77.

Wait, do we have to? We have to. Oh. Okay. Yeah, they made that one choiceless, because they knew. Chuck, you shriek. You raced his side.

It's making it absolutely faking. You put it on a show for Jenny. Chuck, no! We rushed over to his side. Go to the air, be so weak. I hope you can handle that kind of pain. No, he's dick is irreverically broken. Ginny N's beside you.

What happened to him, she cries? The orange light, it must be a force field of some kind. You answer, that's why grandma can't move. Ginny's friend dies, meet yours. What are we going to do now? She asks, what are we going to do now? That's fun. You wish you knew what to tell her.

I leave it and I say anything we want. I don't know if you pull out another business card for five or three years. I say anything we want. I think you pull out another business card behind me. I say was this your card? Yeah, and as you guys go into kiss, Chuck wakes up. Well, what happened to Chuck Murmer's, his eyes blink open. Who hit me? You and Ginny help him do his feet.

It wasn't a who you explained. It was a what? You pointed the orange force field. I never knew light could feel so solid. Chuck Rubb says face, crogly. Okay, okay, hey, you're still groggy. You such a hymnbo. Yeah, Chuck you might be hallucinating

that you had a relationship with Jenny. That's how I'm using it. Yeah, I think that's what happened. Are you hallucinating that you have a chance with her while she's so busy at med school? We better keep out of sight while we decide what to do to suggest. No telling who will come in.

Chuck and Jenny, now they're agreement three of you ducked by a set of large trunks just in time. You hear the door's light open. Turn to page 74, just an out of order book. Just an out of order book. Okay, it's on. It's on. It's on.

It's on. It's on. It's on. Yeah, okay. You poke your head up and pier over the trunks. Two men and overcoast and sunglasses enter the baggage car. The same guys do self-fighting with your grandma.

Yikes. Did you say guys when they remove their dark glasses, you discover they aren't the baggage car. The same guys do self-fighting with your grandma. Yikes, did you say guys? When they remove their dark glasses, you discover they aren't guys at all. Not human guys anyway, their eyes are the size of ping pong ball. Oh, no! It's a little too big. It's a little too big.

It's a little too big. They're a little too big, you shriek. They also glow up to the yellow. Oh, Jenny's got big beautiful toe eyes. Like lizards, they have no eyelids. Chills of terror make your fingers in toes tangle. You slink back down behind the trunks. We're in terrible danger.

You whisper to Jenny and Chuck, Chuck Golpes. Let's wait until they leave and grab your grandma and scram here, just how are we supposed to grab her through the force field, Jenny demands? It almost fried you. Then maybe we should overpower these creeps, Chuk's Exat. Chuk should suggest there are two of them. Yeah, Chuk, you take the lead.

Yeah, go for it, Chuk. You just got your ass kicked by fucking light. Yeah. The light was so solid though. Chuk and so solid. Whoa, Chuk and Ginny can't agree. They want you to decide. Side with Ginny.

We don't ever do Ginny. We have to be. We're a side with Ginny, whatever Ginny wants. Side with Ginny. I't ever do any of that. We have to be. We're just I was Jenny, whatever Jenny was. I could see a world where we have feelings for Chuck too. Maybe I'm not. I'm thinking about a short restaurant here. I mean, I do think that all three of us, it's kind of whoever seems like they're going to be in a relationship, the other person is jealous.

I'm just saying there could be a chuck in and fucking run. Okay. So we want to wait until they leave so we can free Graham off in the orange beam. Right? Yeah. Okay, so we're not going to attack them. So we wait, turn to page 87.

Let's see. Jenny, we agree with you. We pull business card out from behind her. Those guys aren't human. You tell Jenny and Chuck, you shudder. I don't want to try taking them on. You chuck and Jenny scrunched down as low as you can behind the trunks. You try to not even breathe.

Then you hear the door slide opening in, have they? It's hard because I can smell Ginny's perfume. Yeah, oh, she smells like Abercrombie. Yeah. Yeah. She's just inched in it. Where she worked in high school. Yeah.

So I kind of, you know. Yeah, and she still wears the best she's been. She still gets a discount. She's still wearing the best she's been. Yeah, she's been wearing high school. She's run into average all day, so she scound because she worked their time. She's run kidd to have her's all day, so she needs to put on perfume. Right.

Yeah. Um, then you hear the door, door sliding, I think. No, dead bodies and effort for obvious perfume. And ever tried. Are they that different? Okay, so you're trying to see if they've left you crawl between packing crates and boxes,

searching for signs of the creatures. As you slide along the floor, something hooks around your ankle, crash, a large rectangle mirror wrapped in plastic thuds to the floor right behind you. Oh no, did those yellow eyed creatures hear you? Are you about to be zapped? Turn to page 68.

Oh, if I know anything about lasers from the 90s, we can use a mirror to reflect that. Oh yeah. Right on. You wait, nothing happens. Few, you let out your breath. The creatures must have left. You wait, nothing happens. Few, you let out your breath. The creatures must have left. You're safe.

Are you okay, Chuck? Asks rushing over. You sit up and untangle the packing twine that wraps around your ankle. We better move fast, Ginny Warns. That crash was really loud. Someone might come to see what it was. Yeah, Chuck agrees. He helps you lift the mirror back upright.

Luckily, it didn't break. So how are we going to break through the orange forest field and grab your grandma? You scratch your head. Hmm. You murmur, then the mirror gives you an force field and grab your grandma? Scratch your head. Hmm. You murmur, then the mirror gives you an idea. Yeah. It is the 90s after all. We know lasers reflect off the mirrors in the 90s.

Yeah. Right. We just found out about lasers because of CD players. Yeah. Mirrors work different, worked differently than that. They definitely work differently. They were just more powerful in the 90s. Yeah.

We don't get to make a decision. In this one, there's from the 90s. We just turned the page out of the window. I don't know what's better in there. They were stronger. Tell me with this thing, you instruct Chuck and Ginny. Together, the three of you unwrap the large mirror, then you carried over the floor to grandma.

Oh my god, there's three of us together again. This is bringing it back memories. Yeah, this is, it just kind of feels right now. Freshly in here. Freshly in here. If we find, if we're messy. We're thinking about messy. Before the hook up. If we find the right angle you explain,

we should be able to deflect the beams of the force field. What are you doing in here, a voice demands behind you, your head whips back. They're back. The two men in overcoats and sunglasses. Think fast. Turn to page 128. Oh man, we're directing that laser at them. Yeah, we are. Kids from the 90s did not hesitate to just attack an adult

Like even like guys in weird costumes. I mean, I don't know if they're aliens in the 90s like a Doltz and TV and movies were just bad guys And maybe they still are but they definitely were then. They were vile. Yeah. Yeah. No no. Quick you shriek. Lift. You chuck and Ginny hoist the heavy mirror over your heads. It appears to be on the beam. It's like we're doing a kickstand. Yeah. Three must have beers added again. The ray bends and bounces off the mirror straight at the two men. The two creatures stand frozen in place. It's working. You cry, grab grandma.

You lean the mirror against a luggage rack, aiming the beam directly at the creatures. Chuck and Ginny lift grandma out of the chair. She's still out cold, but at least you've rescued her from the force field. Out the back, you shout, hurry. Chuck and Ginny drag grandma out the back door. You follow right behind them.

Oops, you forgot you were in the last car. So genius, Ginny says, is she strange to hold up grandma now? Now what? Turn to page nine, say. From the meds, student. So our chasm doesn't look good on you, Ginny. Ginny, you think you're so smart, just's straight and so hold up. Oh, okay. Now what? Turn to page 9, 6. From the meds student. So our cousin doesn't look good on you, Jenny. Jenny, you think you're so smart just because you got into meds school.

Let's just turn on her. Okay. I take it short rest. Every single business card back. We hand the back. Magic doesn't work if you don't have it in your heart. Yeah, we give her a crossed out business card that says, lose my number.

All right, you glance around hoping for an idea. Your eyes land on a ladder leading up to the top of the train. Up there, you grab a rung and climb. At the top, you reach down it and look up grandma. It would be so hard to lift a grandma up a ladder. Yeah. A passed out grandma up a ladder. It's, you know what, hey, anything's possible for the three must have grandma up a ladder. Yeah. A passed out grandma up a ladder. It's, you know what,

hey, any things possible for the three must have to be a special. I guess if you have three strong 25-per-olds, straighter, right. A lawyer, a med student, and a assistant curator. Yeah, Chuck played rugby at Skidmore. Yeah. Chuck played rugby and we did track and field. Yeah, we did track and field.

We're very active, yeah. Up there you grab the rung and climb, chuck and Ginny shove her from below as you yank her limp. Arms, finally, you're all gasping on top of the train. We don't know how long that force field will hold you warm. We better keep moving. Three of you drag grandma across the car. Against the car tops.

It's tough going. You're not sure if this was such a good idea. I'll see if anyone's looking for us. You scurry to the side of the train, grab my ankles. Ginny and chuck grasp your ankles and lower you down headfirst. You peer into the train car, a gasp. The train car is filled with people and sunglasses. One of them notices you,

he points and moves closer to the window. Pills office glasses, take a better look. Yellow ping pong ball, eyes, those are a little too big. Yeah, little go. The yellow is the thing that stands out more. No, they're a little too big. The yellow and the hilly and. It's painful, a gexxes. Pull me up, pull me up, you shriek. Ginny They're yellow and green. It's just painful. It's a painful the side of the screen. I'm her boobie. What?

Yeah. Kidding. We can't waste any time you urge. You peek over the side of the train again, and stare into a pair of yellow eyes gazing up at you. One of the creatures leaning out the window. Do something fast. Oh, finally a choice.

If you leap from the train before it's too late, turn to page 10. If you wait grandma, so you can try to crawl away, turn to page 28. Man, it was really dumb that we looked into the train car, right? Like I'm embarrassed that I did that in front of Jenny. Yeah Grandma's are like light sleepers because they're always falling asleep on the couch. I think it can rouse her Okay, so we think wake up grandma. Do we think just jump off the train? What we want grandma to meet Jenny? Oh Wait, are you back in love with her? Could you just had lose my number? Yeah Back in love with her, could you just had lose my number? You're a mess. There's a lot going on, okay?

Apparently, okay, so I'm gonna wake up from her. I hired someone else at the gallery. I don't know what to think about it. I don't do it the passion. Turning to page 28. We've got to wait grandma, you tell the others. We won't be able to escape any other way. You, Ginny and Chuck were a server to grandma.

You rub her hands and pet her face lightly. Finally, she comes around. Mom, why? She merr- I imagine waking someone by rubbing their hand. In an emergency situation. You're on top of a train. Hey grandma, you're moving train.

Hey grandma, she's actually rubbing someone's hand. Wake up. Just blowing on her hair. Finding Nemo's not over grandma. She's all sick doing it. My, my, she murmurs. Hey, what am I doing up here? You describe everything that has happened.

She clucks in- Including Jenny and Chuck hooking up and skid more. She clucks. I was afraid they might be on to me. Then grandma tells you an amazing story. I'm afraid they might work up. She's a secret agent specializing

in alien investigations. I've been tracking the evil Mithra Dithra, she explains. Obviously, she assumed my identity. That's why you saw two of us at the train station and why those creatures captured me. Your head swims. This is unbelievable.

But you know your grandma's telling you the truth. Grandma smiles at you. You three did very well. She says, I have an assignment for you. If you dare. What? If you accept the assignment, turn to page 34. If you've had enough of aliens in danger, turn to page 46.

For comedy, I want to say that we've had enough of aliens and danger. And danger. Oh, okay. Yeah. We also have a hockey game to go to. Yeah. So the hockey game to go to, and we also need to

fucking hash out what happened in college. Yeah. Okay. So we're going to say, politely say grandma, we're going to save it for the short rest to do. But for now, I think we have to call this assignment and hash things out with Ginny and Chuck. We're gonna go to the TCBY.

We're gonna have feelings all around. We're really happy for your part. We're gonna get sparrows and TCBY. If you've had enough of Aliens in danger, turn to page 46. Let's see. Are you kidding? You're turning down the chance

to have a close encounter of the Alien kind? Yeah, I'm trying to have a close encounter of the Ginny kind. Yeah. They'm trying to have a close encounter of the Jenny kind. Yeah, they hooked up when I was studying in Brussels. You don't understand. You don't understand. I didn't hook up with anyone in Brussels because I was thinking about Jenny the whole time.

That's where my passion for art really bloomed. And now look the path that it's taken me on, grandma. I studied art history and Brussels, and now I work for Richard Jenkins. Now I work for Richard Mitchell. And he just hires all the artists who are his friends. They're not actually pushing the envelope of our system to try to do it at all.

I don't think he loves art. Okay, so we're getting changed. Arielle Stein's going after us. Are you kidding? You're turning down the chance to have a close encounter of the alien kind. You'd rather go home than spy on creatures from outer space. Boy, you sure aren't the kind of 25-year-olds who usually reads. Give yourself goose bumps. Maybe you should go back to your baby brother's nursery rhymes.

Pink this book up again when you stop being such a wimp. Yeah, we're trying to give Ginny Kooz RL. Yeah, different kind of goose bumps, grandma. We want to make a chocolate. I don't know if you remember. We want to make a chuckle. Well, we have gold. That's good.

We've been absolutely bullied by a book. And with that, we're going to go ahead and call this one. But on the short rest, we'll answer the summons. We'll answer the call. Yeah, call of grandma. And finally the short rest, we'll answer the summons. We'll answer the call, the call of grandma, and finally kind of play out what happens with us and Chuck and Jenny. Maybe even some flashbacks to when we were all out for, yeah, the hot night of the infamous hookup.

When we were in Brussels that night that they both got really drunk and then I stopped hearing from them. Yeah. Chuck said his phone died. Yeah, we had a weekly phone call and they were supposed to pick up and they never did. Yeah. And with that, we're gonna wrap this one up. Does anyone have anything they'd like to plug? I'm gonna plug a TV show that I've been loving.

Ooh. Is that right? Yeah. Is that okay? Yeah. Okay. Of course. Of course. Oh, Mrs. Davis. I love it. Oh. It's so fun. It's so different than anything I've watched in a while. Did it get none one? Yeah. Okay. It's really fun. I'm only three episodes in, but I'm loving them. Okay. Check them out. And also we've got some live shows coming up. We're going to be in Minneapolis for Dungeon Court live on September 13th. Madison, Wisconsin, September 14th. Milwaukee on September 15th, Chicago is a Dungeon Court live on September 16th. Los Angeles for another Dungeon Court on October 26th, Denver on October 27th, Sacramento on October 28th. We're gonna be in Las Vegas on November 10th, New Orleans on November 14th, Orlando on November 15th, and a Dungeon Court live to finish it all out. In Fort Lauderdale on November 17th, you dungeon court live to finish it all out in Fort Lauderdale

on November 17th. You can get those tickets at an epic run at nadpod.com slash live. So be on the lookout for that. Tom C.S. to make sure that it's not just aliens that took over our bodies while we were on an airplane. Oh good call good call. Yeah make sure our eyes aren't a little too big. I will be wearing my yellow leggings and purple shirt. Yes. I was gonna say the entire time I was like, this seems like something Emily would wear. Ah.

We'll be doing the Alt Run or not, not an Alt Run so much as answering the call of grandma over on our Patreon, Patreon.com slash nat pod. What happened between Chuck and Jenny? That's correct, that's NADD. POD don't sing yet, don't do it. Tee-ee. And call the one has something you'd like to plug.

I'm going to plug the person that sent us the product. Yeah. Yeah. Brock S sent us a box full of Goosebumps, Choose Your Own Adventures. So if you like this one, there's plenty more where that came from. Thanks Brock for giving us.

Thank you, Brock. Thank you. Of course you know that we would love something titled Secret Agent Grandma. Yeah, there's some really good ones. There was like, beware of the purple peanut butter. Is there another, is there another funny one? I didn't even mind being real-roaded because for me, it was like, RL signs and I was taking

my hand and being like, hey, let's go on a little adventure together. Yeah. Yeah, it's like one of those pictures on Instagram of someone with their hand behind you. Yeah. It's behind them like while you're on vacation together, but it's Arles. But it's Arles time leading you. Beautiful. And in the distance is a alien grandma.

Yep. And with that, you can follow us on social media. There were me and my man out used at Seagrass Me at Colise Caldwell, at the Extra Demoleon, at J.Gurts' Jake, and you can tweet about the show using hashtag nagpah, this anyDDPOD. We are the... The... The... We are the nation!

They made a book about a video game. Game game game. We made a podcast about that. Book. Hot cast about that Bulk It's the end of the show everyone and you know what that means? It's time to shout out our Benevolent Council of Elders Starting with Brad D. Jeffrey S. You see, later Mixgator

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M.S. Red, the reforged warforged. Dragon Knight 86. The godly king. Hard ones, Dragon Knight 86, the godly king, Hard ones hot hump gunk. Shell B now made it 2019 chasing the two crew back to 2023, avoided the honey trap and smoked a ball with a lawns. Woo! Jake S. Stale bread on a solid AK crouton.

Jackson R. T3RHX, Michelle Andrew S, Novabee the Deathcore Bard, Caitlyn D, Z-Borb, that's just fun to say. Blake H, Big Bev's Bestie, Lloyd the Ratch that controls my cerebellum, Opa Remi from Ratak TV style. Drax, the icy sorcerer, poppa, skydays, memo, skydays, Haley the human, Lord Damon, Duke of the dungeon, and Megan and thank you all so much, you help us do what we love and we love what we do and we love you.

Goodbye, Sweeties.