Not Another D&D Podcast - Adventure Book Theatre: WWE Race to the Rumble

Episode Date: September 15, 2023

The Lorelords lay the SmackDown on this Pro Wrestling "Pick Your Path" Adventure Book (Featuring a special, one-time only appearance by Jake "The Cake" Hurwitz)!Buy tickets to upcoming NaddPod Live Shows Here!---CREDITS:Sound Mixing and Editing by Trevor Lyon8-Bit Book Club Theme by Emily AxfordSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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This is a Headgun Podcast. Made a podcast about that book. Welcome everyone to 8 Bitbook Club! Oh yeah! We're here in this capacity crowd with four people! Tell them about him, or tell them! That's right, we are your Lord Lord's Brian Murphy Emily Axford and called Voltainer and joined by From parts unknown Jake her with new comers to the ring. That's right. It not for the first time

Not even come Brand new arguably brand new since 2020 I feel like the Lord Lord's would be a really good gimmick for us We all come out and we're like dressed like book war like Yeah, yeah, we're wearing like tiny little glasses Really tiny glasses huge quads Trabs some dolls We're just ripping through the elbow patches on our jackets. We're all tinnyard. Oh whenever someone goes down

We like get on them and we're like you're not When ever someone goes down, we like get on them and we're like, you're not Let me educate you brother. We can have the cannonball assay. Okay, well that's good. We got our gimmick. We're the warlords. Because we are reading a WWE choose your own adventure. Excuse me pick your. Sorry, pick your path number one, race to the rumble. Pick your path. If you are, pick your path. Choose your own adventure.

Pick your path. Make your mischief. If you're a WWE fan, decide your fate. Decide your destiny. We are. That's better. It looks to be around 2011. Yeah, it's copy right 2011 on the back.

We got a picture of edge on the back. We got a picture of edge on the back. We got a picture of Ray Mysterio on the front. Can we get some, I know Ray Mysterio, I don't know edge. Can we get a little context for two of these characters? Edge is the ultimate opportunist. The rated are superstar. You are gonna lose your voice, too. I know, yeah.

So Mark, does this put us like firmly, this is after the attitude era, or is the attitude era or the attitude era to take you after this is the ruthless aggression era. Oh shit. Well that's a true thing. That is a true thing. Ruthless from the attitude era to the ruthless aggression era.

If I know my era is right, I believe it goes attitude into PG era into ruthless aggression era or it might be the opposite. It might be PG after they should do like a biological Anthropology class but for eras of WWE I feel like you could really make a nice sign to what era are we in now? Yeah, I think now it's just the current era current era Okay, that's a name Eras get named afterwards Erra became on to that

Started in 2008 so we might actually be in the PG era became on 2008. So we might actually be in the PG era. Hence why there's a... PG? This book is in the PG era. Hence why there's a choose your own adventure book. So it goes from attitude era into ruthless aggression era into PG era. Correct.

I like that. I like the rubber banding effect of history. I have been with Merf for so long and I've never even knew that ruthless aggression era or peace. The ruthless aggression era is 2002 to 2007. So 2008 is PG. Okay. And that is like the movie.

It was like the penulent swung. Yeah. Like the movie rating system PG. So like they made a little more kid friendly in this era. Yes. Do we think we're ever gonna have a scholar working at a high level of learning, like a professor at a college that teaches the lore of WWE?

The history of WWE. Yes, and it will be your husband. It's him. That's what I'm picturing for Murphy. It would be a good marriage, because the man can be a studious little man. That's gonna call him a studious little bat for some reason. He give you a studious, is a studious little man. That's gonna call him a studious little bat for some reason. He give you a studious little rat. Yeah, a studious little rat.

Yeah. That's a rat with a mortar board, absolutely. So this, we are, our stable is called the Lord Lord. So I'm a studious little rat. And I have little rat whiskers and rat ears. And I'm shirtless under a tweed, a tweed vest. It's such a thorough game. You have a tail.

Yeah. It's really hard to describe. Anyway, why don't we go ahead and launch into it. So ready set, well. Oh, your back slams against the mat after your opponent surprises you with a powerful clothesline to the chest. He's knocked the wind out of you,

but you recover quickly. You jumped to your feet and then duck to avoid a kick. You head for the corner turnbuckle, quickly climbing to the top rope. You can't run from me and chicken. I just became conscious, how did I get here? What? What?

Okay. Let's say I remember there was a truck coming towards me and I saw the bright lights and I'm here. Where am I? Is this the after-life? Okay. Shout's blockhead, your opponent. He's a big brute and he's got at least 50 pounds at you. What the hell did he call me?

No, the bad guy is blockhead. But blockhead called us a chicken. Yes, that's true. That's true. Blockhead called us a chicken. I guess we're chicken. Yeah, we are a chicken. We just woke up.

We're a chicken. It's all making sense. I feel like I was looking at the book for a second and you guys ran down a path. I don't know how to do this in InstaKind. You guys think you died? Okay, all right. We're a newborn baby chicken.

I thought we were the lower lords. And we were wrestling things. But we're a chicken, no, they're a chicken. Oh no, that's a meta thing. Is that where the lower lords is right now in this moment? You know what? There is precedent. I believe there was like a match in like the 80s or 70s

where like somebody emerged from an egg for a Thanksgiving match. The God of the God of the Gookers. So I think we're doing that again. It's like we're like, we're the fresh baby chick and we're emerging from an egg. Okay, you know you'll never beat him on the mat so you take to the ropes.

Blockhead charged that you, but you dive off the rope and perform a frog splash. You wear your arms and legs together. Not a good move to do while the guys are charging at you. I don't even know how that works. I guess this would be like a flying crossbody. That's not a frog splash game. You bring your arms and legs together and then,

yeah, sorry, sorry. I shouldn't be editorializing. Professor. Blockhead slams the mat and you quickly apply all your way to shoulders, pinning him down, the ref begins to count. One, two, three, ding, ding, ding, ding, the bell rings, you're the winner. What? Blackhead?

As far as I'm concerned, everyone in this crowd sucks as much ass as Blackhead does down here. That doesn't sound PG. Yeah, sorry, We're taking it back Sucks as much bone. Thank you as much butt As blockhead down here baby chick baby chick Blockhead stands up and grudgingly shakes your hand you raise your arms and Victor alright Blockhead's not so bad actually right you raise your arms and Victor, all right, Bluck, it's not so bad actually.

Right. You raise your arms and Victor and Walker on the ring, the crowd in the high school gym begins to clap and cheer up. So at the beginning of our career. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I just called a bunch of kids. Okay, so we are in hell. Yeah, we're in hell.

Yeah, hell Michigan actually. There are only a few hundred people there, but right now you feel like you're in a big arena. This is what it's all about, sure you dream of being a WWE superstar someday, but you'll do the small shows forever if you have to. That's how much you love Rasslin. You climb out of the ring and grab a bottle of water. You want to head home, you've got to wake up early in the morning to train and you want to be fresh.

A guy in a blue suit approaches you as you're walking across the gym. What? Hey, great match, he says. He hands you a business card. Your surprise has got the WWE logo on it. Police suit. Names police. I scout future superstars for Mr. McMahon the guy tells you.

I'd like to play it on, but I'm just a little chicken. Yeah. Just a little chicken. I can't speak for the rest of my stable mates, but I can say that I most definitely am a little rat and not a chicken. I'm not doing anything for rat. Do you know anything about me? For real, you ask.

Seems too good to be true. For real, Peter Shorzou, Jots down your info. See you tomorrow. Pete's full of shit. Pete's full of shit, maybe. I run away. Don't walk. I run away.

OK, we run away. So we have to go back to the farm. You shake yourself out of your day dream. You've got an audition to get ready for the next afternoon. You show up at the gym for the tryout. Pete is there to greet you. He leads you to a locker room where a bunch of other guys

are getting ready to audition too. Some are bigger than you and some are smaller than you. Everyone's in great shape. Could? A lot of hard bodies. You suddenly realize that if you're going to impress Mr. McMahon, you're going to have to stand out from the crowd. Whenever I DM, I'm going to start just throwing that in.

You're walking through the bar. Everyone's an excellent chicken. Everyone's triceps are unreal. So it's such a good shape. Pete calls your name and you leave the locker room and step into the gym. There's an athlete waiting in the ring for you who looks to be the same height and weight as you are.

Whoa, like three inches tall. Yeah. Again, I three inches tall. Yeah. Again, I'm not a little chicken. These guys are little chickens. Did you like it? Feathertail? No. No.

Oh, wait, that's hot. This works out because we're the lore lords, your rat professor and we're the eggheads. Oh, it makes so much sense now. Yeah, no rats don't lay eggs. And it's sort of confusing, but trust me, you just gotta let me in there. Well, rats don't make eggs and it's sort of confusing but trust me you just got to let me in there. Well rats don't make turtles but the Ninja Turtles happen anyway. Exactly! Okay. That's what I'm trying to tell everyone. You adopted us and now you're teaching us all your

lore knowledge. That's right. Look, a professor needs students. We all became fans of wrestling when we were kids and I feel like I'm gonna take them to the top with me You gotta give them a shot. You were a student list professor. Thank you professor Rhett daddy There's a bunch of guys in suits sitting in folding chairs around the ring and one of them is mr. McMan You like us like he does on TV your heart starts to pump quickly Okay, so we we're starting the magic man wrote this book to pump quickly. Okay, so we were starting to match. Big man wrote this book. Propaganda. Ding, ding, ding. The match begins and you wrestle.

Like you've never wrestled before. You break out your best aerial moves, dominating your opponent from the air. Well, because we're in chicken fights. We're learning to fly. Yeah. Exactly. I know it's four against one, but... You even do a shooting start, jumping off the top rope and doing a back flip in mid air.

After about five minutes, Pete stops the match. Mr. McMahon nods at your opponent. Sorry, kid, keep training. He says in his gruff voice, you take a deep breath. What will Mr. McMahon say about you? Nice moves. Says the legendary WWE chairman. You're solid up.

The legendary. No, let's all look pretty fit. Who's looking so cute So it's looking pretty fit. Ha ha ha ha. Who's looking so, dude? He's looking young. Now let's see if you connect with an audience. Imagine you're talking to a camera and gives, and give me a monologue that tells me something about yourself.

Oh, okay. Don't sneeze. I hate it when people sneeze. Okay, okay. You freeze. You've been a, what about chirping your body? You forgot it. Another important part of being a WWE superstar,

personality. Oh, sure, you say nervously. This is a devastating main character to be. We forgot how to have a personality. We just feel hot. Well, let's think about it like this. We're so hot we forgot to have a personality. Right, yeah.

That's true. We're worried about how good shape everybody is in that we forgot to have a personality. We're too ripped. Being attractive does hold people back sometimes that way. Your palms start to sweat, your mind races as you try to think of something creative. You're generally a good guy in the ring. You can do a whole hero thing, but bad guys get popular really quickly.

Should you try to make the audience like you or should we? Should we be a nasty little chick? I want to be nasty. I want to be nasty little rat. I think that we flap our wings and we say, this chick's got tricks. Yeah. Yeah. And then you do like a tiny little bird shit in the corner of your face.

Yeah. Just like a poof. Uh oh, the bad bird has come to roost. So we are going to cut that eel problem. Listen up. If you were confused before, you're gonna be even more confused. When the Lord, Lord, get together and the rat professor and his little chicken start clucking around and taking teeny little shits in the ring, we're gonna kill for all our opponents

and all the people out here in Stimford, Connecticut. Yeah, we're gonna be at the top of the picking order, brother. These chicks got tricks and they got shit. You decide to take a chance and deliver a bad guy monologue. The only problem is, you're not much of a bad guy. What? You search your brain for an idea, what makes you different from other WWE superstars than it hits you. Oh, we're a part of it.

We're a part of it. And an experience to your advantage. We're only 34. Right, young age, we're just, we're just, we're, we're just, we're, we're 34 year old actually. We're 34, actually. Well, the birds, yeah, the birds are really young. We were, we stayed in the egg for a really long time.

Yeah. Right. And everyone thought we were a rotten egg and that's what we feel about ourselves Yeah, you look at an imaginary camera like mr. McMahon extract to you Then you start riffing off the top of your head mr. McMahon the reason you need me and WW's cuz you need some young blood around here You say when I tune into watch raw. I can't tell if I'm watching Superstars or an antique show. Oh! Supercat?

Superstars these days are out of touch. Most of them think Facebook is the name of a new wrestling move. Oh my gosh, it's so long ago that I knew a few of my whole hands. It's only cause I knew at the time. It's 2011, it's been out for four or five years. And also we shouldn't, we are a chick, we should be calling it face-beak. Face-bock.

Oh, that's good. Face-bock. I can't believe you used to crowd. Who loudly begins to chant what? What? What? What? What?

It sounds confusing the whole time. Okay, Mr. McMahon is nodding his head. That was great. He says, you've got that athletic skills, the personality to back it up. People that write congratulations. You're a W. Superstar. I wag on my waddle seductively advanced.

Wow. Woo-hoo. You jumping the air in sheer. You've been working hard for this a day for years. Now it's finally here. We'll call you Johnny Fresh. Yes, sir you Johnny Fresh. Yes, Johnny Fresh. Okay, so I feel like I should have a say in my own gimmick.

Oh, I thought of another thing, another move we can do. Sometimes I think we can be like, this chicken like, sit cage free and just maybe throw the cage for like a hell and a cell thing. That's good. Throw the whole cage. Throw up and throw it into the Spanish announcer's table. That's great. Gotta pick up the whole cage. And we could also come like down the gangway

and like instead of drinking water, just slam a fistful of worms. Yeah. Yeah. This is really, this gimmick has so many legs because we can just throw eggs at people. Yeah. That's fun to see.

So Vince has decided to call us Johnny Fresh. Gonna make them. So my job is to catch, yeah. Okay, so my name is Johnny Fresh and my, Johnny Fresh and my chickens. Okay. Professor Johnny Fresh. I'll have Pete work up the contracts.

I want to get you on the road as soon as possible. The sound of a cell phone ringing interrupts him and Mr. Rick Van Riezen is about to take the call. He nods. He says, don't worry, I've got it covered. He flips his phone close kid. This is your lucky day Evan born was supposed to face Tyler Rex tonight on Smackdown But he spread his knee during training question. Holy shit. Yes. All right Evan Rex and Neon James Professor rat daddy could you explain you got it? I don't find it super stunning We went to the professor rat daddy. Could you please explain you got it? James

What are those names that we just said? Evan born yet a real one even born a gay Matt's I know yes Young James is awesome. Yeah, the great young Young James and then Fast as fast as fast you need me to you answer your heart pounding. It's your first day as a superstar and you're going to be on Smackdown. Just give me some more of that of what you gave me today. He says you'll be fine. Do we want to give the audience the uninitiated? What does Smackdown mean to the WWE world? It's a show like RAW. At one time, I think it's not live. RAW is like the live show and SmackDown is a taped show.

In a lot of ways sometimes, different runs of SmackDown were superior to RAW, but overall RAW is seen as like the main show. Okay, thank you, Professor. You're welcome. I won't let you down, you promise. The rest of the day is a whirlwind. You rush to the airport and get to the arena by late afternoon, okay, whatever.

We're talking to, whoa, no, no, no, what are the flight attendants like? Yeah, yeah, we chat, we're really chatty. Okay, and do you have a car surface that picks you up or do you have to get a cab? I want to do the logistics about getting to the arena. At this point, we have to get a cab. We definitely don't get drink tickets.

Okay, yeah, yeah. Then you meet Tyler Rex before the match. at this one. Do we get any drink to get a cab? We definitely don't get drink tickets. Okay. Yeah, yeah. Then you meet Tyler Rex before the match. You've always been a fan of this laid back surf or duty. It's pretty cool to meet him in person. Nice to meet you. He says, oh wait, neon James. Nice to meet you.

Yeah, I was like, who is this guy? Nice to meet you. He says, you see a guy named James covered in neon. So you know what, that's a help there? Is it safe? This would make man thinks I do. You say confidently. Before you know what you do in health here? Is it safe? Mr. McMahon thinks I do, you say confidently, before you know it, the natural calls you out in the rain. Presenting for the first time on SmackDown,

Johnny Fresh! Lee Hatch! Johnny Fresh! Lee Hatch! James! Little chickens! The crowd doesn't know what to make of you. I cannot, I give everyone the middle finger,

all of my chicken shit all over the place I rip up a kid's sign I grab a dude's be through that I chug it I grab someone else and pull them over the railing I Hold up a fistful of worms and say I'm gonna make them squirm and then I rip the worms and Find me on Facebook. Ah. Okay, so we try to be fuckers. When Tyler Rex comes out, they go crazy. You know you've got to make an impression fast.

So when Tyler starts talking to the mic, you grab it from him. Easy now, old timer, you say, here, let me show you how to work this thing. I know you old folks have a hard time with this new fangled technology. Okay, so we're making ages of our person now. Yeah, I love this. This is great. Right off the gate, yeah. Microphones are old technology.

It's right here, it's kind of ridiculous. Rex is an old, but that's what makes your attitude funny. Super obnoxious. I am not old Rex protests. Well, you're definitely not fresh. You shoot back, not like me. Johnny, fresh, Lee Hats. You're no spring chicken, I say,

as I throw so many eggs into the crowd. I say, I wasn't an egg for 300, for, for, for, is there already three years on 364 days? Right. Today is my birthday. I'm 34 and I just was born. I was born on my 34th.

I don't know why it's their birthday. They're only a day old. But I've got a lot of friends, even though I'm a new wrestler. I'm coming in with all the chicken and all the chicken. I'm the roost. Go ahead and take a shit all over this guy gang. 33 years and 36 for days, but and I take a shit that represents Everyone out here in Stanford can suck birch and it's for Tom concerned. I don't give a damn. It's the beach here You smell so bad. God. And as I say fuck you, I act like the crowd's gonna say it with me like I'm the rock. Yeah, we try to do a call versus a boss where we say fuck and then go to the audience and no one says anything.

We're seeing Q-Card to say, clock you, question mark, maybe that would be better. Okay, you pretend to sniff the air. Ah, smell the freshness. You can tell you've rattled Tyler Rex. He lunges at you before the bell rings. He reaches for your legs and you figure he's going for one of his signature moves, a flap jack where he tosses you in the air like a pancake

so you land flat on your back. But today is your lucky day. Rex loses footing and slips. You quickly cover him getting the pin. You win your first match. Woo! Yes! It's so fast.

Johnny Frisch steals one. Wow. You leave the ring with your arms in the air. Some fans aren't even cheering for you. It feels great. Backstage, you other super stars congratulate you. I signed several eggs for the fans. I know I'm suddenly gonna cry.

I try to lay one as well. Hey, stop. Stop guys, you're a bad guy. I still as well. Hey, stop guys, we're bad guys, don't sign any of these. No, no, no, I signed them and then I smack them on the face. One of the other newcomers, a wrestler named IT, approaches you or it, hey, fresh, wanna go to a party after the event tonight, he asks. I hear a lot of the big superstars will be there.

Yeah, he do. We'll get to meet guys, we've been fans of our whole lives. Nice. If you go back to your hotel room and hit the sack, go to page 27. Not a dude. You're gonna pay 67. Not a dude.

We're a chicken's party. Yeah. Johnny Fresh and the chicken's party. Yeah. Do you think that maybe, I feel like Professor Rat Daddy in this situation? Because I don't want to lose Professor Rat Daddy. I think maybe he's like our manager figure and he's over in the corner and we're Johnny

fresh in the chickens. Right. Okay. So we go to the party without showering. I don't think we'd have to. Yeah. We're just in our spanbacks. Same clothes.

Yeah. Yeah. I still have stuff on from when I was a professor in the high school chair before we switched to being Johnny Fresh and Johnny Freshly Hasten is chicken. It's just the thing is it works so well because we could have like a big white feather boa and then like a little chicken hood. I got it in my cart from Old Navy

to get like a flannel vest sent to me but it hasn't been sent yet. Right, right, okay. So right now I'm still in the tweet. Ooh, a flannel vest and a white feather boa. This look is... It's electric. It's neon.

Okay, it's Johnny Fresh, tell me. Going to a party on your first night at WWE Superstar, not smart, but it's sure to be lots of fun. You've had a long day and you're exhausted. I didn't really say not smart. It says not smart. Oh. You've had a long way heading towards a PSA.

Yeah, I think so. Yeah, I, you've had a, it's doing like PG versions of like terrible. So it's like you get, you get so burpy from soda. Right, right, right. Exactly. This is our dark side of the ring. Yeah, yeah.

Seriously, this is like a dark side of the ring with the rockers where they're like, they went out and they smashed beer bottles over their head and got kicked out like one day and do having their first contract. Johnny Fresh was being crazy that night. You're on the dark side of the ring, Johnny Fresh. You've had a long day and you're exhausted.

You have a great time at the party and you eat some of your favorite superstars, but you stay up way too late. And that's another thing that another thing that happens what in the morning you sleep right through your alarm clock What about what chick you guys with the sun? We got two fucking drunk. We're the ones that greet the day. I have to cock a doodle do Yeah, the day doesn't start without our cock a doodle do let's be honest. No, just for roosters here, all right? Fuck we don't know that yet. us are roosters here, all right? Fuck. We don't know that yet.

Can a rooster come from an egg? A chicken can become a rooster. Nobody knows. Yeah, no one knows. Mr. McMahon is not pleased. That's not the kind of behavior he wants from one of his superstars. He delivers the news to you through Pete.

Your own probation Pete tells you, you won't be going on TV any time soon. What about the newcomer tournament for the slot in the world rumble? You ask, no way Pete says, you really blew be going on TV anytime soon. What about the newcomer tournament for the slot in the world rumble? You ask, no way Pete says, you really blew it kid, the end. Our career's over. One party.

We're gonna one fucking one party. We're gonna fucking party. We stayed up till 2 a.m. playing Golden Eye and drinking three Coca-Cola's and ruined our life. Ha ha ha ha. That's so messed up. I didn't even hear if everyone at the party was in good shape or not.

All right, so do we want to go back and re-choose the party scene? Yeah. I think that would do that, because I'm not ready to go back and do like a baby face row. Yeah, no, no, no, no. I think that's, we're such a bad

rest material, because you're sure. It's also, it's great that they've always, they're keeping it vague as to like, who each of the wrestlers are. So they're just like, this guy encourages you to go party. And it's just like a wrestler named it. It'd be so funny if they're just like, John Cena really pressures you to go to a party. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha and then he says, you don't see me. Yeah. I was never here.

Because we don't have what it takes if you don't smoke drugs. Okay. Do you think IT's gimmick? Is it like a clown that's really good at computers? I don't think it could be a clown. Maybe it's a clown. Well, it's like Stephen King's gig.

Oh, okay. Stephen King's IT. Stephen King's site. That's right. Stephen King's site. Yeah, you know how Stephen King sponsored IT. Stephen King's IT. That's right. Stephen King's IT. Yeah, you know how Stephen King sponsored a wrestler? I do remember that, it's weird. I'm penny-wise at computers.

Okay, it's time to go. I think we're considering there was this thing for a spot in the rumble. I think we got to move because we haven't done anything. It's tempting to go and hang out with your favorite WWE Superstars, but you know if you play your cards right, you'll spend plenty of time with them during your long career in WWE. That sounds awesome, but I'd better not you say, I've had a really long day and I have to report to training tomorrow. Wait, that's the only reason, because we're really tired and we wake up with the sun and

we have to be up to greet the day. Yeah, right. And today doesn't start without us. We have a responsibility to bring the sun to the pool. We have to be up to greet the day. Yeah, right. And they doesn't start without us. We have a responsibility to bring the sun and we have to get to our hotel room and request a hutch to sleep in. Yeah. Okay, so we go to the gym the next day. Our trainers is guy named Barry. Barry tells us we need to pump up our aerial moves.

They need to be stronger if you wanna take your opponent down in the mat. Okay, but we can fly. I break up to Barry. Yeah. I'm an to put it down in the mat. Okay, but we can fly. I bring it up to Barry. I'm an actual chicken bearer. Listen, this isn't a game for me. I'm Jolly for you.

I'm from an H. I'm from an H. So I can train. I'm a person. These guys are actual chickens. There's much to be to understand. I know only I have. I have the contract.

But these guys like to get an argument Barry call the shots Barry let's drop the cafe for just a second. I'm an actual chicken Whatever you're doing here. I live the gimmick My friends are chickens That sink in you were great That's my new catchphrase when I come out of go like, it's not you, you might know me. My name's Johnny, freshly hatched.

What? What? Let that sink in. We've let that sink in. My friends are actual chickens. Our actual chickens. Let that sink in. Let that sink in front of friends are actual chickens. So, actual chickens. That's just to help the audience. I'm picturing Johnny Fresh. He's got the feather bow and the vest.

But then the other three, they're just wearing chicken. They're just chickens. Yeah, but we are chicken. We are chicken. We're actual chickens. Yeah, we're real chickens. Okay, okay. It's like a chickens that are a little a little over cooked.

Like I said, 33 years. We look like Kiwi-Dui and Lumi essentially. Yeah, we're big chickens. Yeah, we're chicken versions of the duck. The egg grew with us, if that makes sense. Okay, it does. We're what a 34 year old chicken would look like. Thank you, thank you for clarifying.

Okay, Barry, you were great last night. He says, and Barry likes you too, Mr. Minkman's really happy. He wants me to tell you that you can compete for a newcomer slot in the Royal Rumble. Wow. Yeah. Woohoo, jump out of your seat. Tournament begins next week.

Good luck. You fly to Connecticut for the week and training with Barry. Good luck, more like it. I take a sip. I take a sip. Just a little one. Again, they live the gimmick. We're actually giving it to us. Yeah, it's a gimmick to us. Yeah.

Okay, so we're doing, we talk about our cloake on stage a lot. With Barry's help, we learn the corkscrew frogs blash where you do a hundred and eighty frogs blash. We're going to need to change that. Yeah, the chicken splash. Yeah, it adds some extra power. Plus it looks really cool. Finally, the night of your first tournament, match arrives.

You'll be on SmackDown again, wrestling Zach Ryder. The Long Island Loudmouth is known for his purple headband, cocky attitude and signature cry of, woo, woo, woo, you know it. When the match began, rider starts out strong. After pummeling you with some strategic kicks, he wraps his elbow around your head and drops you to the ground. So you hit your head against his shoulder, your dizzy,

but you're able to get up before he can pin you. You counter with a clothesline that sends riders falling on the mat. You're losing and you need a big comeback. Should you try your new corkscrew frog splash? If you try the frog splash, go to page 55. If you stick to your ground name, go to page 69. That does sound like a lot of stuff.

This is because one of us to play pretty conservatively, though. You know, like it's telling us to go home, telling us that we need to train more. I know. By wrestling logic, starting it out, just getting a clothesline early in the match when we're losing, to instantly go for a corkscrew frog splash is fucking crazy.

Do you think we need to stop and pay our dues? I think we need a chin lock to get ourselves reset here to get the momentum going again. But I think that's the wrong answer. I think this book is written for children and children are gonna wanna do the aerial frog splash. So what do we do? It wants us to be brave.

It wants us to be smart and brave. Yeah. It's a chin flock by the way. A chin flock. A chin flock. Yeah. And we're gonna do the cock scrumor. I don't like all this high spot stuff no selling that going straight to the aerial frog splash

but I think we've got no choice. Okay. I think we have to. I think we have to. All right. Okay, so we're gonna have a high splash. I trust you Professor Red Daddy. All right, yeah.

I don't love it but we have no choice. Well, I don't love it, but we have no choice. Well, if you don't love it, maybe we should follow our instincts. Oh my God, I'm wrong. Even though you're dizzy, you decide you need to try your corkscrew frogs blast. You really need to get the crowd on your side and this move will surely do it.

Crouch yours, you climb the ropes. You dive off the top rope, turning your body in midair, but the key to doing the move is to turn exactly the right time. You start your turn too late, and instead of letting that sack rider you land to the side and your feet hit first. The sharp pain shoots through your ankle. Right a roll over on you and pins you.

He's won the match. You've lost your chance to compete in the Royal Rumble, but that's not all you've broken your ankles. No! The wrestle for a few months, you're on the sidelines just as you were getting hot. Or hollow chicken bones. It takes a long to heal. I talked myself out of it. I fucking knew they wanted it to play at save. lines just as you were getting hot or hollow chicken bones. It takes a long to heal. I talked myself out of it.

I fucking knew they wanted it to play at SAID. I actually like that this book is being so brutal to us. I know. Well, just stick to your ground game and I'm like, we haven't had a ground game. No, we're an aerial wrestler. And Barry said we got to work on your aerial moves. So I thought that we're a chicken. We do better in play.

But should have stuck with my wrestling knowledge here. I think your wrestling knowledge is right, but also this book teaches you to be respectful above all else. Above all else. Yeah. Progress at a sustainable pace. Okay. Howdy, net pulls. Called well here to talk to you about Raycon headphones. Raycon's everyday ear buds are known for delivering high quality audio and thoughtful features like a 32 hour battery life and perfect in-ear fit for all day wear and lasting comfort. I personally like to wear mine on runs and I've never once lost power which is great because

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Buyraycon.com slash pop-up. Okay, thanks for listening, enjoy the show. Hey there, NAD polls. This episode is brought to you by Rocket Money. Do you know how much your subscriptions really cost? Well, most Americans think they spend around $80 a month on subscriptions, but the actual total

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So stop throwing your money away, cancel unwanted subscriptions, and manage your expenses the easy way by going to rocket money.com slash Paw Paw. That is rocket money.com slash Paw Paw. One more time, why not rocket money.com slash Paw Paw. So something tells you that doing your corkscrew frogs, chicken splash wouldn't be a good idea right now. You need to focus on winning the match not winning over the crowd writers down So you take advantage of that you sit down and twist his legs like a pretzel writers struggles to get away

But he can't do it. He taps out and you hear the bell ring We got him to tap that's amazing weird weird way to get us heel heat, but okay If one your first match of the tournament you're confident. You cut down the rest of the new covers in the tournament, like a jungle explorer with a machete. I have a question. So Zack Ryder, the character, just got totally smeared. Yes, yes, yes, we tapped him out real quick. Yeah, do you think that the performer was annoyed about this?

Do you think that they were selling him out by doing this? You know, it was the subtle propaganda. So WWE lore, Zach Ryder had a very popular YouTube channel. They got himself very popular, very organically. And then WWE creative buried him because it wasn't their idea. So they had to slow it down. So this is them continuing to bury him. Stupid storylines and they just buried him.

And this is them continuing to bury him. That's what they just And this is that's continuing to bury that's what happened. I knew it would be loaded and dramatic I'm glad I asked this makes sense because we're the young fresh Restler on the scene that also knows about YouTube, but we're chickens. We're a company chicken. We're a company chicken. We say, see YouTube later. And then we just throw so many eggs. All right, so apparently we won the rest of our matches and we're going to the Royal Rumble. It's nice.

Okay, okay. Okay, so it's chaotic in the locker room. As always, Mr. McMahon keeps a list of superstars who will be competing a secret. The order of when superstars enter the ring is a secret to. The number you get can play a big part and whether you win or lose. If you're number 30, you may only have to defeat a few guys to win it all. But if you're number one, you've got to face every opponent in the ring. You look around trying to figure out who will be in the rumble with you.

For the first time, you start to feel nervous. There are some real legends around you. You're still just a rookie after all. What will happen if you have to go one-on-one with one of them in the ring? 30 man bow is the final match of the night, you watch the championship matches from the locker room, getting more nervous each minute. Finally, it's time for the rumble to begin.

Unlike other matches, the announcer won't be calling out names. Pete shows up with a clipboard that contains the roster on it. When he taps you, you're in. It's time for the Royal Rumble, the announcer. Cheers to Mike. Craig goes wild, Pete taps you on the shoulder. All right, kid, you're in. You freeze for a minute.

You've got the number one slot, Oh, no, I was secretly hoping I was secretly hoping for this. Okay, you take a deep breath I got this you say then you step out into the arena after your performance in the tournament You've become a crowd of favorites. Yeah Fresh Let's do it. Let's defecate in the corner quickly. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I feel like I need a mic.

I need a mic. I grab a mic off of one of the interviewers. Here's a line you could use. Here's a line you could use as we came from the coop. I put my hand over the mic and I we got one of my chickens. We came from the coop to take a poop. OK.

I guess if you want it, if you want it, it's there if you want it. Listen up, Stanford! We came from the coop to take a poop! Okay, everybody, everybody, everybody. We're numbers two, three, thirty! Bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, bop, b the documentary 20 years later and that's when we knew the freshly hatched kid was gonna make his uh the cheer wildly as you walk in you stand in the ring eyeing the arena entrance wrestlers going to walk out of there and whoever it is you'll be stuck one-on-one for 90

seconds until the next wrestler is tapped familiar theme music starts to play oh okay well it's a big show Wait is our is our entry music just the chicken dance. Yes, it is We come out. It's a chicken. People go age. No, but it's a chicken version to us. Bapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapap Fucking being done is by the chickens right around me. Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Papa Okay, so the big show has entered that number two if you attack the big show But a 47 if you try to avoid Hey

I'm fucking amped Under under the ropes we charge big show we go for the eyes take out an illegal weapon, okay, right If we lose right away, we'll have made every wrong choice. We've got a lot of rubber chicken full of nails. We went for the corkscrew way too early. We went out the night we shouldn't have. Okay. We're going out to the big show.

As the man with monster stomps down the aisle towards you. Normally the big shows got a deadly serious look on his face, but right now he's smiling. He's telling him to look forward to making the show a few. Because he likes the song Tequila. because he loves the song to Kila You have a choice you could run around the ring like a chicken Oh They're gonna be expecting that

Brave and foolish or you can be brave and foolish and attack him head on you go for brave and foolish As soon as Big Show steps in the ring you charge at him Big Show doesn't even bud she grabs you by the wrist grinning then he toss you over the rope like a rag doll You're out the crowd cheers Jerry Lawler and Michael Kohler Commentating on the match as you slink back down the aisle you hear Lawler say I think that was the fastest anyone's ever been Interactive Okay, okay smile you may be out of the rumble, but at least you're a record breaker the end okay We said that we didn't know we had the option to run around like I'm chicken obviously

We all got a little excited because we thought we could get a cheap shot on the big show We could really just blame it and then in there Every single one. Yeah, we really have. It's, why does this book want us to play it so safe? It wants us to play so safe. Especially because we're on like the evil guy, the heel. They want us to respect Vince McMahon who has never done anything wrong.

All right. We're gonna go, we're gonna hide from the big show. We're gonna run around like a chicken. Yeah, go with our true nature. Yeah, that is our nature. You start to sweat as the mammoth monster stomps down the aisle. Big show is grinning as he climbs to the ropes. Let's see how fresh you really are, rookie stomps after you.

Wow. So he grills and turns around swatting at you. They're just describing him like he's a bear. What does the big show sound like? Do you remember? Yeah, I can't do I can't do an impression Okay, he's a big guy. It's okay. I'm so sorry. I know apologies, but I can sing his song if you want yeah, I do

Big bad show tonight Hey everybody it's me I'm I big show How's it going? I'm gonna get you. I'm gonna ring this chicken snack Okay, you flip and summer saw it all over the ring avoiding big show finally managed to get a hold of you Get over here. He dangles you in here by your ankles enough is enough He says just in time Mark Henry's music being in supply big shows head snaps towards the entrance And he let's go of your ankle you dropped to the mat But you relieve big shows heads of sights on Mark Henry the world's strongest man

The two giants go at it and you spend the next nine seconds catching your breath all those acrobatic tired you out Then the next superstar enters the ring. It's Cody Rhodes son of the American dream Dusty Roots solid competitors just your size you and Cody go out at bat bouncing off the ropes to deliver punches and cakes to each other You're adrenaline's really pumping and you think you're starting to get the edge before you know it It's time for another superstar to enter the ring. It's Evan born You're a huge fan of a time blanks Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness. You've always wanted to face him But you've almost got Cody eliminated try to get Cody out of the ring go to page 78 if you go after Evan go to page 88

We got okay paying it's saying what's the thing? This is a thing is is focusing on the task We are Okay, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, say, one in here has no shots. Although Cody Rhodes would become a star later, but not at this stage. But is that like, that would never happen in an actual real rumble though, for like a relative unknown to go all the way to the top of the rumble? No, that would be silly, that would be silly. Okay, just so you know, just so I run into home,

knows that this is a little silly. Yeah. Yeah, Johnny Fresh is being hot-shotted to the top of the roster. And I don't know that we've heard too meteoric. Yeah, if you wanna get Cody out of the ring, go to page 78. Let's get Cody out. Let's get Cody out.

OK, right on. You decide to finish your business with Cody Rhodes first. Big Show is still into it with Mark Henry, while Evan enters the ring. He spends some time sizing up the situation. Cody jumps up to deliver a dropkick to your chest. Same time, Mark Henry shoves Big Show, sending him staggering backwards.

He push Cody as hard as you can. He flies back, slamming into the Big Show angry giant Frowns when he turns and sees that Cody has hit him for Cody can react Big Show picks him up and toss him over the top row Big Show Alliance maybe So then yeah poop near him so he can smell it and not an enemy Ted de Yasin poop a poop filled with Alliance pharaoh. Yeah, I came in with four chickens. I know that's three chickens, that's cool with everybody.

This is definitely Chekhov's poop by the way. We're pooping all over the arena. Yeah. They told you to count sheep when you went to sleep, American dream. But what you really should have been counting is chickens. Yeah. Before they hatch. Before they hatch. Before they hatch. But what you really should have been counting is chickens That gives you an idea You did it you cry point to get Evan angry

Okay Sorry, I'm lost okay Ted D. B. O. C. Enter Z. E. La Ted D. B. O. C. Junior He looks angry when he sees his former partner, Cody sprawled on the floor. That gives you an idea. He did it, you cry, point to get Evan angry at Ed Jesus. After Evan to avenge his fallen partner,

once again, you've given a chance to rest a few seconds. We're living up to our name, we're being a tricky chicken. Wow, we really are, okay. Okay, this feels good, right? The momentum is there. All right, so- My feathers are tingling. A bunch of dudes get into the ring. We've got a horn swag the momentum is there. All right, so what's up? My father's your tingling.

A bunch of dudes get into the ring. We've got a horn swaggle gets in there. We've got gold dust. Yes, gold dust gets in. Our truth. So we're starting to fill up. Then our truth comes after you. Uh-oh.

If you use your corkscrew frog splash now, go to page 36. It feels like a save for move. Go to page 61. Oh shit. Top rope. Oh, save. That's insane. Is it?

Yeah. We've got to play it safe still. We'll get pushed out. It does feel like we have a lot more people going and it does feel like the corkscrew is maybe the last move. Counterpoint? Yes. We've been wrong every time though and it feels fun.

So should we choose that? I mean, it feels like we resisted it once and now we should be allowed to do it. I'm just wondering if it's gonna be the point. We need it into the logic of the book, we fail. Yeah. And it has outlined a safer option. Okay, so Ted D. Biasi and Evan Born are thrown out.

Our truth and Goldust both enter the ring. Our truth has Goldust in a face lock, then he falls slamming Goldust in the mat. You run up and grab Goldus legs, nodding to R-Truth together, you get Gold Dust out, then R-Truth comes after you. If you want to try the Corkscrew Frog Splash now, go to page 36.

Try, say for move, go to page 61. I'm gonna say, R-Truth is fresh right now. Okay, he's not knocked down, going for a frog splash. Much less a Corksccrew one right now is done. I think that it's early in the match and we need to be safe. Yeah, let's try a safe hook. You can't be run around like a chicken with the Ted Cutoff. Exactly, exactly.

Because we're three chickens. Because we're three chickens. Right. With their heads currently. Currently on. You're not sure if you should try. And we're about three feet tall just so everybody knows. Okay. You're not sure if you should try your corkscrew for X Blash yet you spin and aim a kick at his chest

But our truth grabs your leg with one arm. Oh, yeah, he reaches behind your back with his other arm You break yourself for what's coming? Wham our truth power slams you into the mat Oh, no one hit you your whole body hurts Archie picks you up and tries to push you over the top rope grab on trying to stay in the ring But he's stronger than you with one mighty push. He hurls you out of the ring, you're out of the rumble, I should know. No, I'm calling PETA. I should have tried.

I can't believe you were doing Frog Splat. He squishes all my chickens. You were doing that too, I'm a chickens. Oh, you walked back with shame to the locker room. God, we just can't get this right. I know. Okay, so we gotta try the quirks for your Frog Splat. Okay, your frog Splat. Frog Splat. This is so ill-advised. I don't even know how. I know. Okay, so we gotta try the quirks for your frogsplash. Okay, for your frogsplash.

This is so ill-advised. I don't even know how you do a frogsplash on somebody who's standing up. You feel confident in your frogsplash. First, though, you've got to knock down our truth. Thanks. Yeah, we knew that. First, though, you need to knock down our truth.

He tries to get you in a face lock, but you avoid him by stomping on his foot with all your might as he hops up and down and in pain. You bounce off the rope to add some momentum to your next attack, Wham, you hit him with a clothesline. Yeah. And it's almost a false backward. Or you believe this is exactly what I said we should do.

And this is the safer move. OK, so we didn't know there was going to be like some narration building up to splash. OK, you don't have much time as quickly as you can climb to the corner rope. You leap, corkscreen in mid-air and extend your arms to legs We fly I use my chicken. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I Flap around me and cook up style. Yeah, I nearly crushed you guys as I

Crowd goes wild He looks hurt. He's weak, but you still have to get him over the top rope It's not easy you lift him up and push him over their top rope with all your might. To your amazed many goes over, you've asked for our truth. Johnny Fresh is really proving himself in the ring tonight. Mako Kosoz from the announcer's booth. You're feeling really proud. When you turn back, you see a lot's been going on while you're busy with our truth. The great Kali has entered the ring along with Kane and the Miz.

Kane's in a lot of places around time. The great Kali easily ousts him. Then he takes out both Mark Henry and the big show or exhausted from the non-stop battle. Now to the Miz and the great colleague, the Miz nods at you and he realizes he wants you to team up. If you take your chances, alone go to page 62,

I'm pretty team with the Miz. Go to page 30. Okay, again, we've been wrong about everything, but if there's one thing I've learned about wrestling is you can't trust the Miz He's gonna throw us out if we work with him. Okay, but also of any time we've tried to fight a big guy We've just been murdered, so I don't know what to truly don't know what to do here. What would the chicken's do? What would the chicken's do?

The chicken's we only survive on alliances and the grace of Larger humans that will keep us alive. We got to flock together. Okay. We're going to join the Miz. Yeah, we have to trust the Miz. Okay. If you agree, we have to give him some bird seed and he has to let us eat it out of his

hands. Yeah. We put for a serious wing and we do a solemn rendition of ppapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapapap chicken. We fly to be amongst them. Angel halos, a pierrofer, our chicken head. I know Argy makes really confusing. You're only gonna get more good futurely based Cheapy la. That's called well. Oh dear. No credit. God. Okay, that's called well.

The great colleague is more than 7 feet tall and 420 pounds. You and me. You and me. You might be able to take him if you work together. You nod back to the Miz. Let's climb. He tells you we can launch an aerial attack and take him down from above. Miz definitely doesn't do aerial attacks.

It sounds like a good idea to you. You and the Miz climb the top rope. The great colleague just snures at you both. He reminds you of King Kong snatching planes from the air on top of the Empire State building. He'll probably do the same to you. You think about climbing down, but you're too late. You feel a push from the side and turn to see the Miz's grinning face. He's taking you out.

It's every man for himself. The Miz says, that's right. You say, you may be going down, But you won't be doing it alone you grab the miss's ankle on your way down and pull him to the floor with you What were they thinking Jerry Lawler wonders you are eliminated the end? Okay, I slap him with a wing I'm losing up to you. You made a mistake coming to the coop Oh, yeah, we try and turn this into a rivalry that's a mean of that I'm losing up to this. You made a mistake coming to the coop thinking you were kicking over the roof. Oh yeah, we try and turn this into a rivalry that's a mean of it.

Oh yeah, you just blew the coop. Oh yeah. Swing in a miz. Slap, slap, I take out an illegal weapon. Nice, nice. Oh my god. Chicken with a knife. It's a great game. How'd you like some chicken cutlets? Good lord. Nice. Okay. I think I'm pregnant. What? Just throw that out there. See if it gets any meat.

Sorry my chickens are confusing me as well. I'm devastated of the eliminated. Oh, and then instead of tequila, I say, I'll kill you. Whoa, and my total weapon. Just a chicken with a name, Tiger. Talon's okay. Why don't we go ahead and wrap this one up? We've been eliminated from the Royal Rumble, but we will take another crack at it.

Yeah, we need to go back to the point where we teamed up with him is. Yes, yeah. Great. We have a wrong. We were wrong on every choice we made. Every single one. Every single one. I think that's great. I believe it was every single one. I don't know that we made a single correct choice.

I don't think we were ever correct. Because we keep trying, we keep ignoring our instincts and then trying to guess what the book will do because it is such a punishing book. Right, and we're also chickens who are just historically a very dumb animal. Oh, actually, I think that's the real reason thank you, Carl.

Yeah, we also are living the gimmick. We are chickens. All right, we will take another crack at this over on our patreon patreon.com slash nadpod that's any ddp od don't sing You know what we have some live shows coming up We have some live shows coming up on October and November. So be on the lookout for those and get ticket over on nadpod.com slash live. We're gonna be on Los Angeles for Dungeon Court live

on October 26th. We're gonna be on Denver on October 27th. You bet we are. We're gonna be in Sacramento on October 28th. Of course, check it out. Oh my gosh. Check it out. We're gonna be in Portland on October 29th for

Ducky Park, already sold out. Then we're gonna be in Las Vegas on November 10th. New Orleans on November 14th. New Orlando on November 15th. And we're gonna be running it out with Dunger Court and Fort Lauderdale, Florida on November 17th. Chicken out. Chicken out.

Chicken out. Sweet, and you can follow us on social media there. We may or may not use at T 17 Oh, chicken out sweet and you can follow us on social media there We may or may not use at teach nurse me at called these called while at a extra Emily and at your curvets of Jake And you can tweet about the show using hashtag nad pod that's any ddp. Oh, D would go Terrible They made a book about a video game Game game game

And we made a podcast about that Book And now, it is time to thank our benevolent Council of Elders, they are Brad D. our benevolent counsel of elders they are. Brad D. Jeffrey S. Lord of the Fjord. Hugh C. Later Mick Skeeter, Matt M. Cutter W. Feared Al. Daniel G. Dylan B. Katie G. Dungeon Mama, okay, maybe a little bit sexual. Daniel Dastardly Dane, Beardman Dan, Danny P. Vincent W. Victor T. Balnor's Boy, Hoyd's friend Justin

High, Danny Danster, TJM, Traylee Vikray, Christopher B, Damial R, Jordan L, cyborg version of Josh The Cobald. Jason Statham is the Robin Runner coming to theaters 2024. My God, I can't wait. Princess Yarr, Michael L, Jury S, Jack L, Sam L, Nicholas C, Star of Every Film, Ever Made in Bahumia, not currently starring in anything in solidarity with the WGA and SAG Aftra. Hell yeah.

Samuel B, Mike H, Alka Smeltzer, Plus, Great Value Gemma, Adam G, Tyler F, Panama James, Horadrian, Rex Daniel the White, Diana DLL.L., C.C. Lulu, Hericule, Poirot, the Rabbit-Fote, Detective, Timmy R. Lucas B. Rayco, It's Kevin, Calder, Will Come, Cold Again, Winter Is Coming, Hashtag, C.C.C. forever, Shada too, My Fairy Followers, Taylor B. The vengeful, one-winged angel, Cass skateboard cast, captain of the Stevens, Steven C, Mike K, Lady Taco, Joy T, Victoria M, Callie's nail artist, and gossip buddy, C-U-N Chicago. Oh, yes, we cannot wait.

Jake L, Nick W, Swashbuckling, Swag, Snagger, Agnity who's inviting everyone to a little picnic called Manges. September 7th, in Central Park, on the Hexcher Playground lawns. Amazing, have fun everybody. William W. Big Bad Beardow, the Mad Eric Mick D, Riot Ryan, Hungry Dave's Frisbee Golf Bud, and a Ramma Percival Frederiksdain von Mussel Klowowski Day, Rollo V. 3rd. Adam the Simple Dimples, J. Dragonborn, Vincent, if attacked by a circus, go for the juggler D. The Sandraan Ben A, Dave H, Catherine S, David K, Christian S, Dustin S, Danny F,

Hawkeye, Pierce, bookvars assistant, Izzy F, DPC, is awesome, Sean the shade tree mechanic of Zelbaldar, Summer R, Gruntair, Kat, C, Misa of House in Zunza, Ariel the occasional mermaid who will be sitting front row center at the 5th anniversary show, Channing Murph Murph Murph. Selina N.A.K.A. Valacy Raptor, B. Perky, always Pat L, Sevexel, Maxwell J. Lauren H. Tahlia, Ryan S. The Bone Duster, Annie M. Fey Fluff's The Fluffyest of Arch-Fay, Melissa Ball Business Illustrator, Cloup's Carly A. Connor Savage, Celil Leviathan, Bioquart 7, Amber Dexterous, Sullivan H. Trubhop Dropper, Jack H. Crabster Champion of

Crod, Scuttling Sideways, towards tomorrow. Lindsay W. Steele, Birdie, Vailen, Carlin, C. Emily S. Noah, the bagel of all things. James, G. Everything, Bego, the Aladdin, who just wants to hang out with his pet batcher, Stripey. Danny, Master, Dandy, Eric B. Marcos learns that Balanced Druid, Dakota Dakota JP, Frida M. Pogos, be troved, self-broclaimed fate prints until Halloween 2023, stay tuned. Tracy P, the quick elf librarian, Maggie S. C. U. Inch Chicago, we will be their Holly H. Kristen Z. Leah C. Hunter H. May B. Pixel stars, Akash Thakar, Andrew Crick, Plainswalker, Dufinius, Cal, just Cal, Edison, N, Russell H, a monk named Dilgo, yes the whole thing, yes every time I wouldn't dream

of anything else. Cody, C, our friend Simon, painting vivid dreams with telekitty creations, trying to inspire art that tells his story. Keychains Pentium II processor. Laura Lively, succubus and Kira Herbusti Queen, Matt M. Your friendly neighborhood, Yant and Yunkl, Andrew and Sid, CU in Minneapolis. John Adams, yes like the president, Meg the Mel Carrier, manager of Bohemia, who has gotten promoted due to her superb service to Simon. James F. Jimmy A. M4L Austin S. Knight of the Living Fulster, Wayfarer has now settled into their new life in the Fey realm as a florist what could go wrong. Shane C. Barpo Good Barrel Barred Barian, Mary Beth C. C. All in Chicago,

and N. Y. C. Contender in the making three awakened Goose's Welshlander Gareth G1 Big Curd, Mr. D, Talisman the Man with the Lucky Charms for you, Dana the Daisy, Sean Jay, Ethan B, Renee the Monster Captain, Gabrielle W, Box Clifton the Once and Medium King, Olivia the enchanting bard who is working hard on her audition for the lead singer of the Mountain Croses. Winter, slayed for his H-A-K-A life is like a box of Martha Tockel's sticky bonds, Riley as FICO angry wheat, Thrath the demon lord of spite. Anthony, the ratist of dudes who secured his Carnegie Hall tickets for himself and his lovely partner Josh the finest of dudes. Josh H Clementine T. Caleb L.S. Ferry followers say hi. Hashtag called her, will come, called again.

Cantrip Dumbledore the bear onesie wearing bar barian MJ the BFG drinking tea by the sea. Little Ferret Powell dogs of Bab, Mr. Miyawski, Geno T. Mama, Bell, The Silver Serpent, herself, Funier, Sinat, Spell, The Wizard, Derrick D. Kallu-Kale, Can't Wait to See You Play, at Carnegie Hall, Yay! Tristan the Talentless Hunk, MJ, Johnson, BTA, Workshop Proposing to the Love of Their Life after the Minneapolis show. Good luck. Can't wait to hear all about it. Alex K. Joshua P. Joshua S. Alexander. Lins W. Angel La Pamela Sandra Rita as this continues, you know he's getting sweet

to indeed. M.S. Red, the reforged, war forged, a cat patrolling their territory and greeting friendly humans along the way. Hard one's hot hump gunk shall be. Yes, from the Sprite Girls, check out her new single with Lichni Spears, Kritmi Baby one more time dropping this autumn. Still, bred on Salad aka Kruton. Jackson R T3R HX Michelle Andrew S. Anastasia W. The Honey Goblin Nova B. The Deathcore Barred

Caitlin D. Z. Borg Blake H. Big Bev's Bestie Lloyd the Rat that controls my Sarah Bellum Opa Remi from Ratatouille style Shelby C. Papa Sky Days Memos Sky Days Taylor B. Oh, it's V. Tommy W. Mike and Lisa sending love to y'all. We send it right on back. Haley the human Megan and the big M. John F. the dice lander. Stephanie of House and Zunza. Jake's ramen shop Tracy P. Cargis Benjamin A. Sacrificial Otaku pen name for Calais cousin who discovered anime and is trying to spread the word all over Bahumia, sav the advisor to princess, shiverblight who helped decide that it was indeed a good idea to help out the other dragons and crew. Thanks for that.

A misunderstood kid whose upbringing was mostly just fine, the terrible trio of George, Chester, and Toad. Thank you all. That was a hate gun podcast. Hey there, mad polls. Jake here to let you know about some very exciting live shows we've got coming up. On October 26th, we'll be in Los Angeles for a dungeon court live at the Palace Theatre. There are tickets still available at nadpod.com slash live. In the next two nights, October 27th and the 28th will be in Denver and Sacramento for

some actual play episodes. Our other Dungeon Court live is sold out in Portland. So get your tickets either in LA, Denver, or Sacramento while they last can do that over at nadpod.com slash live. Thanks so much. We will see you out there. over at nadpot.com slash live. Thanks so much, we will see you out there.