Not Another D&D Podcast - Bahumia Two-Shot: Potcedonia's Reckoning (w/ DM Jasper William Cartwright)
Episode Date: July 30, 2021Welcome to Part 2 of our special Bahumia 2-shot DMed by Jasper William Cartwright! With only an hour remaining until their curse becomes permanent, The Boobs infiltrate the Baron’s castle i...n search of the mythical device that made them miniature! Beverly goofs a giant, Hardwon has a trissed connection, and Moonshine phones a friend. Listen to Jasper on Three Black Halflings wherever you get your podcasts! Support us at Patreon.com/Naddpod to get access to the after-show and a bunch of other Naddpod content!Music / Sound Effects Include:Sound Design by Daniel Ramos (twitter @schubirds and website: www.onlydans.cc)"Pordemola" by Emily Axford."The One Who Came Before" by Emily Axford."Evo" by Emily Axford.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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This is a Headgun Podcast.
Welcome to the campaign after the campaign.
This is not another D&D podcast.
Welcome back to the home, everyone.
Oh, the home!
I'm your Balnor. I'm your bough nor.
I'm your bough nor Brian Murphy.
Sorry.
I screwed up already.
It's weird.
It's hard to say that you're just bough nor.
But that's just, that's what's happening right now.
That should be enough.
That should be enough.
It is enough.
And you know what?
You know what it is.
And I am here with Jake Harwitz.
Hard one, Surefoot.
Emily Axford.
Emily Shines-Abhin.
I'm actually currently on vacation.
Do not have a Ryan Plan.
But how about getting on a Dragonfly?
Okay.
Woo!
That's pretty good.
That was very good.
That was very good.
It's also factually inaccurate because we have not been on the Dragonfly.
There.
Well, it's aspirational. That's right. That's time. And then of course, called Altanner. group because we have not been on the drag of life. There.
Daspirational.
That's time.
That's time.
And then of course, called Altaner.
Pants, poopy, mini, marsupy,
beaver, leap, toe, gold, the fifth.
Let's get into it.
Really nice.
Did forget that you shit your pants.
And you're a kangaroo.
Don't forget.
Do not forget.
And then of course.
And then of course, our benevolent DM Jasper William Cartwright.
Hey, I'm your guest DM who's excited to play with them.
I guess do it now.
I think it's very sweet.
It's better than Dickman arguably.
Slightly.
But remember what the Dickman says.
He goes, it's simply must go.
Trade mock.
Sweet, and with that we will throw to Jasper. Jasper, take it away. Sweet, so last time we left off the band of boobs, having been transported to a magical island,
had found themselves at the end of a rather nefarious plan by the Baron, Terraspon, shrunk down to a minuscule size, escaped through
a sewer, met a great dwarf named Hondok and found themselves in a city on a bed of La
Zanya. They now, having had their papa wrangled by a gentleman named Blavin, they are now a
top papa and heading towards the castle Gregorborn.
As if you remember correctly, the clock has just struck 11.
So, let's get into this.
You are heading up on papa and you see there is a window sill.
Probably just a high enough for papa to scramble up onto it.
That's what he does best. So you take off towards the city.
Is it this point that the clock strikes about 11?
Oh no.
As you, that means we have one hour.
There's a window relatively,
distance easy enough for Papa to climb up and inside of.
It's broken.
You can see the windows
broken. This is the shattered window of the kitchen in which the dish came out of.
You sort of scramble up to the top of this ledge and at the stroke of 11. You turn
around and you see back where you came from, the sort of the the real kind of scale of all of these
pots
As you see eebie turns around and goes I should probably show you this is a this is pot's adonia
She kind of gestures out and you see that there is probably a collection of somewhere of some of between like
70 to 100 pots
all gathered round.
And you see now that little lanterns
from the outskirts, like pots start rising
into the air of all different colors and shapes and sizes.
Some of them are slightly more impressive.
There's like ones that look like insects
kind of moving through the air.
You see the next kind of ring of pots air. You see the next, like, kind of ring of pots in.
You see little fireworks going off, like tiny little fireworks.
And in the final kind of inner circle, there's like full, like, holographic light shows going on
with, like, spectral insects kind of like doing, like, like, I don't know if you watched the Beijing Olympics or whatever,
like, when they had, like, the projections of or whatever, like when they had the rejections of like a lion
and stuff running around with patriotism.
Yeah, yeah, it's like a full kind of like a deatific.
Is that the right word? Deatific or what is it?
A deatific?
Yes, a deatific.
Like seen and then finally end with this kind of the figure
of this like glowing kind of creature, this arms outfolded.
You see that it has a hollow face and like a spined halo that goes round its head
as it glows up into the air and you hear a collective in, sorry, with sacrifice there is progress.
Like as all of them seem to say it, like together.
But I really pointed this thing and says,
I was gonna be that things, Pat.
Since I did crit on Beverly with a Thornwip,
I just out of curiosity was like,
oh wait, it's a can trip,
but then I realized they level up.
So with a crit on a Thornwip at a level 20,
I did do 32 times.
Oh my God.
You're welcome.
You broke my pouch.
That is amazing.
So I would like to also immediately heal.
Your clothes are fully shredded.
On your little kangaroo body. I just fully shredded up.
Oh, no.
I would like to immediately do a cure wound.
Amazing.
Well, that's what you're doing.
I'm going to do.
How much damage was that, by the way?
32.
32, okay.
So I'm so sorry about that.
And then I'm going to immediately do a third level cure wounds. Cool
Actually, that's not gonna be enough. I'm gonna do a fourth level. Okay. Can I get a nature check, please? Yeah
Okay, 15 on the dice 22 absolutely fine cool. So you cost that with no worries. You managed to heal a heal him for 32
She managed to heal him for 32 nice
Exactly what I did
That's amazing You just thorn you thorn with me again, and it takes the damage away
Nice like a wet swampy whip that just extends around you and it's like a salm
Like spa wraps. Yeah, it's like, it's like spa wraps.
Yeah, fully.
Do you guys think my name should be Beverly or Bouncer Lee now?
Beverly for sure.
Beverly, Beverly, Beverly.
Beverly, look firmly in the Beverly, I look away from the party and look at Evie and go,
what were you saying, Evie?
I yell Beverly or Bouncer Lee is what he said. I'm a little bit more like a little smile.
I don't love.
She's got a little bit of a surety in her.
I went again at her one.
We got this.
She turns around and she goes like, oh! Hard one nods and sweat.
She turns around and goes, oh, you already have a thing.
Okay.
Anyway, what I was saying was, I don't actually,
sorry, was it bouncing now or?
We're going with Beverly.
Beverly.
Oh, I see him.
Beverly, you see what actually, you wouldn't actually
be there, pet.
You see, that is the one that came before, sort of like the most evolved of all of us.
When the civil seed happened, they appeared and are the sort of most advanced creature,
whoever, well, Grace Potsadonia.
And they graced us with gifts and keep us plentiful and it works.
But they have been missing, you see, full, sometime.
And just returned or?
No, no, no, that's just a projection of the...
It's just a hologram of memory.
It's memory?
That's a treat.
Oh, okay.
Then, Beverly, that's partly why I'm hoping to find the one
that came before and hopefully bring them home.
Partly why I wanted you to help.
I don't know if this is the right time to say this,
but I just wanna say it's really sick
that y'all have holograms.
Oh, I'm not gonna believe it.
We could have lived in a place with holograms,
but my friends rescued me.
Yes, we don't actually have the holograms.
It's the Enlightened Tree.
Hey, you can dismount at any time, Beverly.
I actually tried to trade you.
I guess it wasn't actually a hard one's idea to do that.
It was a good plan, I must say, it's a good plan.
So when did they disappear?
And are there any leads asked to what happened to this creature?
Well, we think they were taken by the giants,
and you see, well, the Enlightened in the States are,
well, they genuinely have our best hopes for us.
They feared retaliation should they try and mount a rescue mission.
But we on the outside, we need the protection
of the one that came before, otherwise we get attacked
by large beasts. Who was the one that came before otherwise we get attacked by large beasts
Who was the one that came before?
It was this hologram did they have a name? Oh, I believe they in the United in a states they called them EVO
Eva they
EVO yes, and evil I'm hoping that I can find EVvo and bring them home. Well, a rescue mission is right up our fucking alley. Yeah, and what is the
Origin of the through sacrifice. There's progress. I'm curious about that through sacrifice. There's progress. It is
something that Evo
Believes that
Both good and bad things must be sacrificed in order to progress through the natural state
of evolving, you see.
And what kind of sacrifice?
We're not talking about actual folk.
Oh, no, no, no, no.
It's sort of like, you know, say your grandparents
have like antennae, but maybe you don't need
the antennae now because your ears,
you have better hearing, so you kind of sacrifice
the antennae of your forefathers
and say you might not be doing it to them.
Interesting, it's kind of just a beautiful way
to say evolution.
Yes, so it's like losing your tail.
Lotion, okay.
I'm a wink at.
I'm a wink at you this time.
I'm a wink at you this time.
I'm a wink at you this time.
You just got that, okay.
Yeah, she does a wink and it's smooth as fuck.
Like this wink is so good.
I swallow my tongue again.
Holy shit. Don't immediately, oh my god, so good. I swallowing my tongue again. Holy shit.
Don't immediately, oh my god, not again!
Hard one staggers backwards.
So what, give me the high mug number?
No, give me the jogging.
So, you now, Papa manages to crawl up and into the kitchen.
Don't immediately looks around and is like,
okay, this is weird. It's normally
like really busy in here and the ballroom. And he points out like a service door, which
is where you saw that waiter came from originally. And it's like, it should be super busy.
Yeah, and they have like way too many salad bowls. Can we do perception check?
Absolutely go ahead and do me perception check.
Maybe they're out there looking for us.
Look alive people.
Okay.
Okay.
19.
15.
21.
22.
Nice.
What was it for you, hard one?
22.
What?
22.
Shout out to the Tutu crew.
So you, as you scan around,
we see next to you, first of all, there is a big chest.
You reckon this is probably actually like a chest
that you can easily hold in the palm of your hand
with like a big lock on it,
and it says civil seed on the side.
And they look at it and they're like,
oh, so in there, that's what makes out there.
So they cook within the food.
Yeah, they cook with it.
Because if you eat it, then it increases your size,
but if you heat it up too much,
there is the chance that a spontaneous civilization
can spawn out of the seed.
It's sort of like a beautiful melding of irathas
and meloras raw power combined into one small little seed.
It's quite awesome, really.
So, if I were to just produce flame on this little seed,
I might create a spontaneous civilization.
I mean, there's like, I think there's probably like a lot of them in there.
So, I see.
I mean, you'd probably create a lot of stuff.
So it's like, it's like a human seeds or something
Then you like you kind of could grate them up into a powder or you could just like sprinkle them on you
You can you can prepare it however you like yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure
Sometimes they just hold that right right right recreate a civilization. Let me tell you when they just cook them up
Wow, man, it goes off like popcorn and yeah anyway
I'm a little concerned. This is worrying with a 21 you hear
the tiniest little as you see coming down the counter with its back raised barely perceptible
you just see like a first a pair of eyes and then you hear a
You just see like a first a pair of eyes and then you hear her as a black cat is fully stalking you and Papa.
All of you guys are right and Papa right now.
Jess, I'm gonna tell you right now as a human.
This is S. Emily. I'm talking to you S. Emily.
I have a fucking black cat and I fucking love him.
I can't hurt this cat.
I just got a level with you. Okay, I'm back into moonshine. Wow, what hurt this cat. I just got to level with you.
Okay, I'm back into moonshine.
Wow, what a beautiful cat.
Better than a cast bandit, I'm smiling.
You see the cat makes direct eye contact.
Seize you looking at the box of civil seed
and just, like pushes it off of the signs.
And you see, chug, chug, chug,
like it's just like this huge crashing sound.
You also look down and see that this little chest
was 100% a mimic as their mouth of the mimic
is out there.
Oh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
He's in it.
However, the cat now takes off
in a full sprint towards you.
Pop off freaks out and starts running.
You can direct pop off as to where you wanna go. You could definitely scramble to the door,
to the ballroom, that's where the gun is.
What are you, where are you directing, pop-off?
I will say that he's making towards the door currently.
Is there only one door that leads to the ballroom
or are there other doors?
Yeah, so there's like two kind of like revolving doors
that can in an outdoor kind of of thing Okay, it leads in an
I guess we'll go to the ballroom. Yeah, I'm gonna say I'm gonna flee from the situation fully because of the players
Collection for black cats and not one early hard one ready's ready's his hammer. I try and cast speak with animals on the cat
Yeah, you can absolutely try to call speak with animals. What's what level? It's just the first level. Oh sweet
Hello, feel I'm friend. my name is Bevere Leap.
I am a immediately like cat thing
where it's surprised by like a cucumber
and just goes, where are you?
Like what the?
I'm just looking at you and then it's like,
speak my tongue.
I do.
And I have treats for your tongue.
If you will help us, I fish out from my kang kangaroo pouch some of the shrimp that we got from a sewer
Topper where you the bow-girding that sewer
Swat them with my tail
The cats like Hot runs like you have an after- I swat them with my tail. The cat's like,
hmm smells nice.
Yes, a fancy feast for you, my friend.
What do you need?
We need a distraction, perhaps,
so that we can get into the giant's ballroom unseen.
Ah, well, you could just walk in.
You see the cat just prces over to the door, opens
it up and the ballroom is just fully dead. There's no one in there.
Can you ask the cat where everybody went?
Specifically the gun. That's kind of the main.
The gun's still there. Do we see the gun?
Whoa. Great.
Oh, this is a freaking set up.
Please ask the cat where everybody is.
My friend, first of all, what is your name if I may ask my name is
Cyril pleasure to be too
Civil beautiful name beautiful name from beautiful
Cyril okay, uh Cyril do you know what happened everyone that was in the ballroom?
well
They partied and then they stopped partying and
They left They partied and then they stopped partying and they left.
Out the front door.
That's generally where people tend to leave.
Yes. Sometimes people leave to go up to the second floor.
Oh, well, some of...
Okay, well, if we're going to talk semantics, sure,
some of them went up to the second floor, yes.
Okay.
Some people might be on the roof smoking.
Okay, good to know.
Yes, yes.
There's a strict no smoking inside policies, so they would absolutely be on the roof smoking. Okay. Good to know.
Yes. There's a strict no smoking inside policies, so they would absolutely be on the roof
if they are indeed smoking.
Yes.
Well, if you continue along with us, serve his R escort, we will get you all the shrimp you
can eat.
I promise this is not all the shrimp.
Surely you will.
Share it.
The cat's like, I make threats.
I call that with halbona and goes, I want all the shrimp.
Deal.
I'll save the purposes of this.
Yes, you could speak to this cat.
It's a funny bit.
Yes, we'll do it.
Hard one, we can just buy more shrimp.
We can't just buy more shrimp
We found this shrimp in the sewer. You see that she just like to start the cat
It starts like fully just like lets its claws out and it's just like picking something from its teeth and just looking at you
Hard one like really vindictively
I'm gonna stand down, but only because I know moonshine will not help me in this
Moonshine is fully sheathed Rosalene.
Okay.
Amazing.
So do you guys make your way over?
What do you guys do?
Are you making your way up to the gun?
What are you doing?
This feels like a setup.
We run for the gun, that's my move.
Let's not run for anything.
What's the other door?
Hey, gorgeous Cyril.
What's the other door go to?
Oh, just the rest of the castle.
Where most of the nobles are staying, I guess?
That's probably what's that.
The nobles?
Oh, sorry, I need more shrimp if I'm
going to give you more information.
Just eats the shrimp again, making direct eye contact
for the hobby.
Can I read it, Beverly, please?
I implore you, Beverly.
This business has extra sewer on it.
I'm going to cast, create, food's because I have extra sewer on it. I'm gonna cast, create food and water
to create more shrimp for this cat.
So it just starts pouring out of my pouch.
Not quite seasoned the same, but fine.
I open my Fanny Pack and I make sure to give it the works.
That is a third level spell if you need me to do it.
Oh yes, roll, yeah, it's roll.
Okay, thanks for asking us. It is insane when we get into a fight and all of these
Divine Smites. Yeah, they're all gonna be gone
That is going to be that's a 20 oh no actually oh sorry 23. Oh, okay, yes, that's absolutely the
I saw a mouth like a boy
It's like we're level 20 now. It's not good
Stuffed backfires is not a good thing.
I don't want to clarify as well. We can absolutely cut this out.
But the wording of the one that you rolled called well literally says
Yes, spell backfires and whatever effect it would have happens to you.
So that could be a good thing if you're casting like a healing spell.
Yeah, just make me a nice instance.
You just I've just rolled that you got turned into the thing.
Yeah.
Would I just start barfing shrimp forever?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Cool.
So you feed the cats and you see Evie kind of looks around and goes, okay, what's the
plan?
This feels dodgy.
Evie, will you describe what Evie all looked like to this cat and see, I mean, young
bevers kept this cat very well fit.
I feel like we could ask if the cat, if Cyril has seen this Evo.
Sure.
Evo gets off and goes to have a conversation with the cat.
Go ahead and roll me insights, Chex.
Oh, pretty good.
Oh my goodness.
Dirty 20.
Nice.
15.
17.
Dirty 20, 17.
I got a holler sack.
Let me...
Oh, damn.
You look over and there's like a moment where you think
that the cat recognizes someone
and DoDo kind of steps forward
and is like, yeah, you need to watch out for that cat,
by the way, it's like really not.
We've had like a run, it chased me once, down the hall
and it was the worst day of my life.
Well, second one, I wanted to find out
when I found out in Lausagne, second time for sure
was when Cyril Chase, he was awful.
It's okay, I got a lot of shrimp in this pouch,
so we should be okay for now.
Okay, look.
You've got a lot of shrimp in that pouch.
Okay, so friends, what do we think
we're gonna do with this situation?
I feel like walking right into the ballroom,
seems like a trip.
Let's look in the other door first. I think so too
I had to see great so as long as we're all casting votes
I said run for the gun so it's three verse one
Rod one takes off and immediately runs for the gun right cool
Beautiful so you
You go and like I imagine it like you all kind of stack up as you look around the door, as you creak it open.
You have to get pop art to open the door for you,
because you guys aren't strong enough to actually open
the door to this ballroom.
When we look through the door to the ballroom,
just so I have this prepped,
I just want to see if there's any plants around in there.
There are, actually, yes.
So there are other plants.
There are other rare looking plants
that seem to have been collected and are being shown off
by Baron in the ballroom.
So there's a lot of other routes of facts.
I just take note of that.
In case I need that information later.
Plants on plants.
Plants on plants.
You peek around the door and it's pretty empty.
Okay, so let's go to the castle corridor.
Let's walk down this corridor, seems less likely for this to be a trap and kind of poke
around, maybe investigate.
I think there's a trap everywhere, but the other one just seemed like such a trap.
So you now see, as I should go through the door, you do see there's lights spilling from
underneath another door. Is there someone like, it looks like someone's pacing up and down
behind the door.
And you can hear kind of some sort of slightly worried
sounding like muffled speech.
Absolutely, I want to overhear that.
Yeah, listen to that.
Cool.
Can we hop off, hop on, almost crawl into,
or like basically walk to where the door is raised
a little off the floor? You guys can fully just like army crawl underneath the door like you are so small.
I want to see if I can get a get an eye on anyone in the house.
Cool, yeah.
You drop pop off and you...
While we do that, I think I am gonna actually pass without trace.
It's a second low.
Oh, that's right.
Go ahead and roll a stealth checks, everyone.
So second low, we don't have to roll for?
Second level you do, but it's a lower DC.
Okay, I only got a nine plus a seven is 16.
I will need a roll from you.
I'm afraid to move shine.
You want to need a roll? I rolled really bad on my stealth
if that affects your decision.
I just want to, I kind of just want to,
I want to see what this shit does.
I'm on the ride, I'm going to do the roll.
I got a five.
Ronaldinho, a five.
Oh, this is good.
Roll me a D4.
Four.
A four.
Wow, okay.
All, so you cast pass without trace,
and as you do, you see that the smoke,
what does it look like to pass without trace?
Is it like a wispy smoke?
Is it, um, that's cool.
You know when you're in water and then like,
you kick up a bunch of mud.
Mm, mm, mm.
You're sort of like that.
Sure.
Mm, mm.
When you see as you kick, as the mud kicks up,
the mud seems to congregate on some of the,
on like you're all of your weapons,
like all of your allies' weapons.
And it seems to kind of glow and glisten
with a little magical energy.
For the next minutes, you have plus two,
to your attack and damage rolls.
Whoa, whoa.
Okay, we haven't even got a fight,
but we can break some furniture on the way out.
I choose you got on my sword, it's making it so powerful. That's definitely the cheese.
You get through the door and as you do, you see the guy with the eye patch and the duster coat
is kind of walking back and forwards like, okay, it's gonna be okay, it's gonna be okay it's gonna be okay they are not they are not going to come back
it'll be fine they're not gonna come back they're not gonna come back an exact revenge on me because
they're tiny now that's nothing they could do surely the barons got a plan I really oh my god
okay maybe I should just leave maybe I should leave if I pack my stuff up and just leave then I
don't have to work for this guy anymore.
It's all fine, and I'm not in this mess.
Okay, pack my stuff up.
And you see this guy is now going round
and starts like fully packing his stuff.
Um, I just, oh, shit, the gun.
Okay, I really shouldn't leave that there.
Run, run, run.
It was right. Can I? Hop't leave that there. Run by. She was right.
Can I?
Up on, up on.
I wanna jump onto his, um, pant leg.
Cool, you just,
and he's like,
no, I do need to pee, I do need to pee.
Okay, he walks off towards the toilet.
Oh no, I hope he's not someone who takes
his whole pants off to pee.
Out of fully just does a bowel, nor takes the trousers all the way down.
Uh, and you're right all as well.
You just get lost in like a fold of clothes for a minute.
Uh, you hear the sound of him peeing, he pulls his trousers back up, then walks back out.
Right, okay, continue to pack.
Uh, right, what do I need?
Oh fuck the god, the god, Jesus the god.
Uh, and so you see he, he's gonna walk over towards the door.
So what are you guys doing?
He's like fully walking towards where you guys-
Let's hop on pop-up, scramble away.
Yeah.
Can I cast command on him?
Ooh, yes, please.
Mer-face.
I don't like how does it scale?
No.
It's at first level spell against Omega Giant.
You know, I meant scale to this size.
Oh yeah.
Good.
I can't.
I mean, if you didn't, if you didn't.
I'm like, reverse gravity on his butt hole
or something like that.
I'm like, maybe a double-beetha-proper scale.
Yeah, can I try and climb up him?
And I tried this once before in the Bohemia campaign, but I think this might actually work now
I'm gonna climb up into his ear and speak command like I'm his conscience. Okay
Can hard one just start walking towards the gun
Coca-Cola you fully leave Beverly, uh, Beverly again as well. as you take off towards the back towards the ballroom.
Um, you climb up and you get into the ear,
and you whisper, what do you whisper,
and what is your spell save, DC?
Um, so the command is a one word command.
So the one word command is just going to be,
Stay.
Stay.
Stay.
What's the save?
Yeah, it's wisdom.
That is a
23 god damn it so actually actually got a four
You go to the to the gun I mean true. I'm not there
You can hold me too. I'm just saying, I respect you, Jack.
You didn't say.
So you don't hear, I think inherently, you all know exactly what happens.
Beverly tries a goof as this guy just goes,
sticks his finger in his ear, wrinkles it around,
and then just ping, flicks, Beverly, you're gonna take some falling damage, my friends.
Oh, no. Chestnut, all circle. Flix Beverly you're gonna take some falling damage my friends
So high up serial help me oh dear lord that's bad. I just rolled damage. That's not good. Okay
There is a peak to how much damage can be done remember
No, I think Xanathar's made it worse. Yeah, what?
Do I know what Jasper wants to do?
It's, I believe it's capped at 20-D6.
Yeah, that's the original one, I think, yeah.
So that's what we did for Bev the first time.
And I'll do exactly the same.
So that's 65 points of damage to you, Bev, as you get.
Oh, man, how do I tell the character? I'll say you actually I'll say you actually take most of the damage by just fully hitting the door, and then
peeling off, and then falling down, as he flicks you away, and it now swings the door
open, you are still in the room, and it just comes up to the corridor and goes, wait a
second, is that the...
Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, sees Papa as you guys are sprinting down the whole way and
it's just like, oh god, fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
and he sees Panicking, he's gonna roll.
Can I get a long strider on Papa to increase his speed?
Hell yeah, you can.
What level spell is that?
That is a first level spell.
Beautiful, you cast a long strider, Papa, the guy gets kind of close.
He's not going for you.
Like, he's clearly trying to like outpace you
to get to the gun first.
You are sprinting.
You burst through into the ballroom.
Papa's in full scramble mode right now,
like practically like skidding on his belly,
on the floor, trying to get there so quickly.
This guy wheels around the corner, a bevel.
You, I think, are taking you in chase.
Yeah, yeah, I'm following after.
I report sports everyone say,
hey, surprisingly it didn't work.
I will say it, bevel you're quite far away
from the ballroom right now.
Because you couldn't have done it.
It's like pant leg or something as he's going.
Can I summon Cyril?
Cyril is not like Cyril's over by like the the ballroom door.
Like she's less interested.
She was not interested in finding out
whatever the hell happened when you guys went into the castle.
Are there any potted plants with trees in them?
I'll say there's a little potted plant.
I'm gonna cast tree stride to get from this tree
to the other tree.
Okay, one of the ones in the ball room.
Yeah.
Hell yeah, go ahead and roll me, what level is that again?
Fifth level.
Give me that religion check.
Uh, 15.
Total?
15 total.
My friend.
Roll me that, and he's six, baby.
Can I see him?
Uh, you guys are like in a full sprint taking off towards the thing.
No. okay.
And he's actually in the other room still.
He's in the other room fully in the other room.
He's currently climbing up onto like a plant pot.
And there's this like a tiny little,
like just like a house plant that he's trying to go straight
on.
All right, here we go.
D6, please.
That's a three.
A three fun times everyone.
So this is what I will say.
I can get you here.
If you fuck up, I can get you back into this room.
Okay.
Cause I've got transport via plants
and I stake this out for a reason.
Nice.
Okay, here's what I'm gonna say.
The tree gets sucked into you and disappears.
Whoa.
What? What I never managed it.
Okay.
Three.
No, the tree disappears, not Beverly.
The tree disappears.
And then you guys, as you bust into the bullroom,
you see a tree who just gets pelted like out
and just like hits the wall.
Oh, seems normal.
We're gonna get that.
Do you say that the tree went into my pouch?
Yeah, yeah, it went into the pouch and then it just, like, it came out of another tree.
Another tree, yeah.
Beverly shredded.
Wow.
It bevel-leaped.
Yes.
Cool.
Okay.
Well, I'll figure it out.
You guys do whatever.
You see now, Evie has now climbed on top of Ciro.
It's just like, what's the plan?
What the hell are we doing?
Could you get Beverly?
Yeah.
Could we get Beverly?
Where's Beverly?
He's in the other room, he tried to climb up and whisper something in the dude's ear.
My word.
And unbelievably backfire.
Against all odds, it didn't we?
Okay, sure.
You see she sprouts little wings and just fully takes off.
Sarah's like, I'm not going because Beverly's has the treats
and he's not here.
Just carries on weaving her way around the thing.
Meanwhile, this guy is fully in a sprint to get to the gun.
What are you doing?
I think we had a dash action pop-up get to the...
We're scrambling.
So pop-up dash action, you get up to this glass box.
I'll say pop-up is easily able to flip the glass cage off. You get up to this glass box. I'll say Papa is easily able to like flip the
glass cage off. You get up to the gun. You're now like at eye level with the kind of barrel of the
gun and you see that there is like a clear chamber inside where like the bullets would be like
in a traditional gun and inside you suddenly see this hand who whom against the glass of this like
see slightly see through barrel of this gun
and then it smashes and you see this
glowing eminent like eminent figure
with no like a hollow face and this
halo around its head starts to emerge
from the gun and just sort of floats out towards you.
And you see the guy fully stops, looks and goes,
well, fuck that, and just fully takes off out of the ballroom.
Well, we did it, we found him, we found him, gang.
So you see this creature kind of floats towards you and goes,
wow.
Ah, you're finally welcome from my slumber.
Thank you.
You are my de-
AAAAAAAAHHHHH!
And you see, as Cyril, the cat,
perched on a window sill behind you, Just a paw on the lever. Just goes
Teehee. And flitz the lever.
He was gonna do that myself. So I'm glad that it was a bad thing and you didn't
not me. All these like metal shutters come down as these beams of arcane energy
like reach out of this creature and hit the wall.
And they start, you know those things
you get in a science museum where you put your hand on it
and all the little bits and bits.
It's like that basically.
And they're all coming out of this creature
as it looks like it's being ripped apart.
This creature is screaming and it's like it's like managing to like scream and like three or four different
Octaves and you see suddenly as like it's like whole body starts to glow red and it looks at all of you for and says a
trap I
Should have known I
cannot trust any of you
Me and I need everyone to go ahead. I'd be about you hard
Everyone needs to go ahead and roll the initiative baby
16
Crit on initiative hell yes nice
I got a dirty 20 uninitiative. I have a rule, a home rule, so no one at me
that with a nap 20s uninitiative,
that we go for, it's a plus,
like a plus three effectively.
So like, Bal no, you got a 23.
Just because I feel like,
No, that's fine.
That's fine.
If you're like someone like,
you have like a plus nine,
it just feels super unfair to then someone to beat you
just because they're old and at 20.
It's like, well, yeah.
They just wouldn't, you know what I mean? So we are now into
initiative. What happens first before anything else happens? You see this creature
looks towards you all, is it sort of floating there, and you see that it feels like it's,
it looks like parts of its form are getting like, and I'm like pulled and pulled apart by this,
these like beams of energy, basically.
Then they're kind of like latching out onto parts of the wall,
which are all like metal,
because like these shutters have come down
to kind of enclose you in effectively.
And as this happens and it kind of glows red,
you see that it now, it's formed, seems to shimmer,
as four kind of first like spectral versions of itself, then very solid versions of itself
float out to basically meet each of you, face on. Mm, oh no.
Yeah.
And we get the impression that this is because
of the switch getting flipped, right?
It would seem that this is because of the switch getting flipped.
And I'll just clarify as well that it said that it,
it said this was a trap and like,
then started going red and looking at you guys,
it would appear that they think,
this creature thinks that you set this trap,
that you're responsible for whatever is happening to it right now.
I will say as well, as to the two that float towards hard one and Balnor.
You see that it's like, even though it doesn't have a face, it's just like a hollow.
You see that it almost seems to be reaching out towards you.
There's a weird slightly 3D effect thing going on, It's just like a hollow. You see that it almost seems to be reaching out towards you.
There's a weird slightly 3D effect thing going on
where you're seeing it come towards you,
but it's like there's different versions of it
reaching out towards you.
And you see these ones, they get slightly thicker
and beefier, and the two that go out towards Beverly
and moonshine.
You see that they seem to look like a little sliter,
more wiry, and their arms get ever so slightly longer.
So.
Does the one that comes after Beverly,
like go around the corner to where Beverly is?
Oh yeah, this is very true.
You are, oh, you didn't get into the room.
Yeah.
Oh my, well, we've got your initiative orders. We'll see if Beverly makes it into the room. Yeah. Oh my, well, we've got your initiative orders.
We'll see if Beverly makes it into the room.
I want to be haunted by this thing too.
You are currently outside of the room.
And the tree that was in the room we were in
is now no longer.
No, the tree is definitely there.
Yeah, I will say the tree, unfortunately,
the tree, whether the tree landed,
a shutter is fully come out on top of it
and just cut it in half, it's really sad.
All right, tree.
All right, tree indeed.
Beverly, I'll say that you can see,
you look at the door that was open to the ballroom,
and you just see this thick metal shutter
just zoom down in front of you.
I just, so, at the top of the round, we have the one,
we call the evo, evo that is in front of moonshine.
Moonshine, I need you to go ahead and roll me a deception check.
A deception check.
But what if I'm telling the truth, I didn't do it.
Actually, sorry, you can roll a deception or I'll let you roll
um
I guess like insight kind of would also work whatever's higher for you
Just because deception feels like the wrong flavor. It's just the best thing to use
Deception is actually a better form. You can do that. The liar
That's gonna be a three becomes an 11.
Well, Krushet, it is powerful.
Nice.
Okay, guys, go ahead.
I'm so sorry, I feel like I failed you.
It became a six.
Damn it.
Which then becomes a 14.
A 14.
I might even be a generous DM here and let you take that one back, Ball Lord,
because they rolled a 19 on their insight
and they get a plus 14 to this roll.
Good God, yes.
So thank you.
Oh, good.
So there's not even a reason for meeting.
It was a limited chance with them.
You actually be going fast that time.
Moonshine.
This thing in front of you, you see that it's like,
you're getting that similar.
As staring in the face was so much love and peace in my eyes.
It immediately glows red and launches towards you.
No, so you see that same kind of 3D effects,
like you strippy effect is happening.
It's kind of like when there's strobe lights on,
and like you wave your hand in front of your face,
and you're kind of getting that weird like,
woo, I need you to think. there's like strobe lights on and like you wave your hand in front of your face and you're kind of getting that weird like woo.
I need you to think someone put Molly in that swamp water.
That's just in the shrub.
I need you to think of a memory from moonshine's life.
Hold Maribel in her arms and pretend to be her sister and just like kind of like pardon
ways with the aunt that she never knew and she wish she did.
Give me one like word, like a descriptive word
to sum this memory up.
I guess it's just as simple as hard.
Hard, okay.
You see the creature looks towards you and says,
struggle is important,
but sacrifice is more important for progress.
And she's gonna take some attacks against you.
I'm gonna take some attacks against you.
And I will say this happens in your mind, by the way.
Like other people don't hear this,
but I will say that you get
the impression that they were looking for something in particular. They wanted you to offer
something in particular, which they don't feel like they got with what you gave.
Okay, so on the future, I need to remember a moment of sacrifice.
Yes, well, they reference both sacrifice and progress. So make of that what you will. However,
the what happens as you reel back from that memory you suddenly
You kind of blink for a second and you can't remember what happened with at the end with Maribel like what what did happen and that memory is gone
At the end with Maribel like what what did happen and that memory is gone
Wow through sacrifice through sacrifice there was progress everyone
What do I remember up until?
so I will say that you get to like the end of the fight
and You I think it was that you did you go into like a plane was like a separate
plane that you went to to speak to her or would she just like a friend. Oh, she was frail.
That was it. No, she was she was just like dying and so I like comforted her. So you see
her like super frail on the ground. And then I and then the only other thing I remember
is fighting her in hell. Yeah. Pretty much. I'm like, that's like the next thing.
Back in Maribel, fuck Maribel.
Why didn't you think that?
What?
Woman.
She could have been an ant to me, but she chose another path.
She ended up being good.
Wait, she was super sympathetic, Mojang.
She fought me in hell.
I killed her, and then she fought me in hell.
I genuinely love the fact that you're playing level 20 characters,
because I get to play ridiculously strong characters too.
Okay, so that's a 30, a 31, and a 33 to hit moonshine.
Good God.
Do you know that really?
It succeeds with flying colors.
There is 13 points of slashing damage and then whatever I said minus a 13 of necrotic damage.
As this thing, as it brings its hand up towards you,
a shimmering glowing samurai sword appears in its hand,
and it just cuts down through you, and as it slices,
there's like white light left on your body,
where it's like sliced through you,
and then it starts to like sour and turn
as it's like negrotic damage starts
like eating away at your flesh.
So how much damage was it total?
So sorry, that was a total of 87 points of damage.
87 and then is the necrotic damage
can't be healed or anything?
No, it's just necrotic.
Okay, yeah, yeah, it's just necrotic damage.
It's just in case you have any resistances to slashing or anything like that.
Moonshine looks at this creature and she says,
I think you took something from me and I don't know what,
but right now I feel really fucking pissed.
And I'm gonna get you.
They look at you and say through sacrifice, there is progress.
It is now, it's the one facing off against hard one,
because they're all well initiative. There is progress. It is now, it's the one facing off against hard one,
because they're all well initiative.
I live.
All right, bring it on, come on.
Hard one, same thing, you feel that?
Don't say that, there's a fight that we say.
I just went through it.
You feel that same moment?
I will ask that you didn't hear the other thing that happened.
So feel free not to med a game, but also, you know like it's fine
Let me know I
Actually grow a deception check
Right oh they wrote low
So to die
That is 15 they got a full witch became an 18 unfortunately
That is They got a full which became an 18 unfortunately
Hard one got a 17
What do you don't want it?
It looks like a hard one. She says something bad happened to me and you are above it and she gives them a 17
What do you get so that I had five to
Amazing, so you succeed you still kind of you feel this sensation is need to offer a memory
So what is hard to make about okay?
I genuinely thought of this before I knew any of the rules so this is not met a gaming I think of
Sitting in a hot tub with a tris
Please can you with a trist. Oh my god. Please. Oh, you let me go.
Please, can you offer me a one word descriptive?
Can I just waste my part?
I was gonna say, Boundor's nose just starts bleeding
and he has no idea why.
It's your connection to like another timeline
in which he didn't do that. And like, you're like, please let us be that timeline and you just can't get them out though
Actually in in this in a weird way it was kind of like
Munchine was kind of moving to close and hard one decided to sit back and not try
So it is it's a sacrifice in in a way
Munchine Mhine mutters to delusional. He doesn't know why
The one word is game game game
They look at you they look at you and go.
I look through your memories and if there is one thing that you do not have hard, one short foot,
it's game and they're gonna make some attacks against you.
You got an under-sacrifice.
Why, why make an attack? You already have.
You crit with your words, good guy.
Okie-dokie, so that is going to be, I take it, a 16 does not hit.
Rolling that one, so that lets you know how much they get to attack.
And they rolled a 22.
Shield.
Shield.
Oh yeah. Oh yeah!
Nice!
They also roll a 30, however.
OK, that'll do it.
That'll do it.
That'll do it.
Squeaks pass.
53 points of damage.
And only seven of that is slashing damage.
The rest is necrotic.
Get in here with that.
I'm going to be funny.
I will say they rolled pretty darn well on the damage from Moonshine as well.
Like that was brutal indeed.
Okay, we are now.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know. I don't know. I don't looking like they're getting fucked up? Um, yes.
You see moonshine losing the most one of the most formative moments of your life.
Same with hard one.
I don't know how long you still have that number.
Oh, thank God.
So all I did in giving you that portent role was like,
You keep the memory.
Yeah, absolutely.
It ate a hard one.
I keep a already delusional man.
And she says, it's right over here.
This hurts my soul.
The heart of the magicians, the person in front of them,
and in front of them as a heart-wired woman in attacks,
four times.
Amazing.
Yeah.
I just really thought of something dumb. I just really thought of something dumb. I just want my heart
Absolutely know it
So funny, okay, oh
Jesus
17 on the first attack
Total that is miss unfortunately
32 on the second attack that's a miss now joking. That's a hit. Oh god
32 on the second attack. That's a miss now, joking. That's a hit. Oh, God. I'll just roll it all of a minute once. Yeah, I got a little out of the way. Only a 19 on the next one. That's a miss, unfortunately.
Okay.
Jesus, oh, reroll twos. Shout out to the two crows.
But this sword that was handed down to me by pev.
Good lord, I can't roll for shit. 18 on the last attack. Unfortunately, that misses. He hit with one of them attacks.
Great. Okay, I'm gonna go to not a lot of damage,
because this is absolutely not what Balner was built for.
12 damage. Cool, cool.
Is that magical weapon, right?
Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, hardshin.
I believe does hardshin do D6 to fiends and undead?
Was it pretty sure?
Yeah, because the current sword I have
does 2D10 against fiends and undead.
So I think that hardshin does 1D6.
Is that would you consider these any kind of fiends
or anything or?
It's clothed as a celestial, but it's not like
entirely a celestial.
A celestial? Show doing necrotic damage. Yeah, it's. Yeah, 56. Yeah, so that's what I'm gonna. So I'm gonna say I'm gonna say you can do that
That's fine. I'll rule that you can actually damage that's sweet
12. Okay, so this thing is so full 15 total 15 total
And then I'm going to action search
Yeah, just get look at him.
He just looked thinking about some dumb.
Um, the one that you're attacking seems like so on phase
by the fact you're attacking it.
Looks over and goes, yes, I can see into his mind.
It is the most ass-in-eye thing you could possibly imagine.
Is there something with a trist?
He built up this whole thing where he was like really into a
women with facial hair and then he just switched it and was just in
his...
They're not weaves.
They're face is covered in leaves.
Yes, it's strange.
He really remembers that memory, sort of...
I can deduce when memories are lies and not.
And I can tell you, he remembers that really differently to the way the Tristus does.
Really, like uncomfortably differently.
I feel like you and I could get a beer.
Yeah.
Are you guys boys?
I almost stop.
That's not me.
I don't know what's to be anywhere else than what we're supposed to do.
Um, also as a, um, purple dragon knight, which is the subclass that I chose for Belmer, because
I had to rebuild him.
He has inspiring surge.
When you use your Apes and surge feature, you can choose two allied creatures that can
see or hear you within 60 feet of you.
Yeah, 100%.
Yeah.
I can grant one melee or range to attack with your guys' reactions.
Whoa!
So we'll join in hard one. Wow. So we join in, hard wow.
So I'll take four attacks again.
Good lord, shout out to the two crew.
And I just rolled a second too,
so I rolled my two and got another two.
Wow, brutal.
So that's one attack missed.
I just went to the two crew,
and that was cool.
Yeah, I got it.
I'm welcome.
It was good.
As if you haven't already fully earned your place. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I'm glad I brought one of those good. As if you haven't already fully earned your place.
Yeah, now.
With this amazing adventure already.
Full standard one shot.
26 on the next attack.
That'll definitely hit.
Great.
Oh, another 26.
Oh, there you go.
Oh, you're really getting them in this time.
Well done.
Thanks for trying so hard.
You're gonna go out of it now.
Absolutely trying so hard.
Please try so hard. Unleash the purple hounds.
And then a 22 on the last attack.
That just hits.
Nice. Okay, so I hit three times.
And obviously the extra, as well, the extra sword damage to that.
Good God so many ones.
Still gonna be okay, I think.
43 damage.
43.
Yeah, Malnor.
Yeah, we're daddy.
All right.
We're the hounds.
Oh, oh, oh, oh.
Oh, oh, oh.
Me too.
Get out and keep hearing it.
I'm not gonna forget it.
I'm not gonna love it.
I am living for this drama between Balnor and Hard one.
Yeah, you, Balnor, the one that's the one that you're fighting,
lean toward and goes, would you like me to slap him for you?
I don't want him to die, just slap me.
Slap me, but look at him.
Yeah.
The shorthand looks directly at Hard one.
It doesn't hurt, it's just a full, just a full bit
slap across the face.
And you're the one that you're fighting, Hard one,
just looks forward and goes goes that's your fault
What didn't you do hard one what
Who tries also pretty matter
I'm remembering you closing
You're remembering you letting me close.
It's a nice memory.
Did you get Dumber in the past year?
I think it's obviously that I did.
Did it you just meet your dad in heaven?
He's been living in the creek and drinking a lot of
creek water.
I pivoted to selling loose horse meat as well.
I was just at a real rough time the last year,
like fully down his log.
Beautiful.
Okay, hard one.
Okay, I'm gonna attack the,
this thing in front of me.
I will also like, this is all happening
on the back of Paw Paw right now.
Just so everyone is aware.
Great. Paw Paw is also moving. I will also like, this is all happening on the back of Paw-Paw right now. Just so everyone is aware, great.
Oh yeah.
It's also moving.
I will have Paw-Paw like move.
In fact, some more roll me initiative for Paw-Paw
because I should have done that.
Oh, Paw actually goes on my turn
because I'm going to fungal form.
Oh, being nice.
And that turns him into a dire wolf,
not to give you a,
excellent, well, excellent.
Yeah, let's get up to that.
Lever with Paw-Paw if we can.
Yeah, that's what I'm hoping.
Nice. Great. And any chance that I can lever with pop-off we can. Yeah, that's what I'm hoping. Nice.
Great.
And any chance that I can slide down the tail like Fred Flintstone,
I would take that one.
Absolutely.
That's just for flavor.
I am just going to take.
I'm going to use great weapons fighting.
You see that the one fighting you goes, oh,
so you're a copycat now as well.
Is that what you're doing?
Because I'm inspired by Fred Flintstone,
one of the greatest cartoon heroes of all time.
I'm just cartoon.
I'm happy to have you, the honey mooners.
You're f**k's sake.
I can literally see your memories, and I remember someone doing this, what's the name?
Down a terrask?
Tail?
Much cooler than a...
Oh, wow.
God.
What are the same size, right?
Oh, memory I know.
But, you know, just one is a terrasque.
God.
Oh my, you're making me want to hit you so bad.
What, did you get at this?
You did, you did.
Great weapons fighting.
I'm going to minus minus five to add 10 to the damage.
Oh, okay.
I'm going to die over.
We got like that.
Selflessly.
Selflessly.
Oh, did you get to take your reaction?
I'll be really quick at that.
I'll be really quick at that. I'll be really quick at advantage. Oh, you didn't take your reaction text.
I did it.
No, no.
Do those guys right now.
Yeah, good stuff.
No.
And I think you can I didn't we have a thing that pop up I could use my reaction to sports
through or I could use pop pause reaction to to sports was that a thing that we did when
he became a god.
I don't I don't remember.
I can only sports for like a D4 so it doesn't matter for four damage or something.
I'll let you out of D4
I do I
Crit on my reaction. Oh, here it comes
We hard one crits on 18 18. Yeah, so it's pretty. Yeah, it's great
We've all listened to nadpa dude. Come on
I'm gonna go ahead and a great weapon master. Can I great weapon master on a reaction attack? I will say yes
I'm generous Okay You have a baby.
Okay, 23 to hit.
That hits.
Nice.
So, so much stronger.
Hold Balnol.
Dude, just summon the purple dragon.
That is 28 damage from Harvon.
28 damage from Harvon.
27 damage from Moonshine. Harvon is your turn. 28 damage from hard one. 27 damage from moonshine.
Nice.
Hot one is your turn.
You're gonna take some swings.
I'm gonna attack the person,
negging you.
So totally undeserved.
I'll take four attacks.
That's another crit.
Of course.
Naturally.
So 26.
26.
This creature is gonna use its reaction
and it's going to parry
It's plusing seven to its AC on that one. Yeah, I love parry. Sorry sorry to side with the creature
But plus seven to its AC Wow, so 26 is not 26 is not here the 26 misses
Well fuck me there's another 26
Oh, no, it's fine just on the the one. It's just a one attack.
Yeah, it's just a one attack. It's not like that.
Yeah, yeah. Great. So then the last two were another 26 and a 25.
Beautiful. Two hits one crit.
Beautiful. And I'm gonna, I'm gonna action search as well.
Do it a lot. Do it a lot at once.
Alright, that's a 26. I was waiting for this moment.
I knew it was coming.
Another crit.
Oh my god.
Wait, because you crit on like 15 through 20.
Yeah, that's only a 17, so that was a mess, right?
You mess on that one, and they just lean forward and go,
hmm, getting a little slow there.
Oh, ow.
Why?
It's hard to make from a little 20 after.
Yeah, it's really hard.
Yeah. You just have to power through.
It is, that is 211.
Oh my god.
Oh.
So, man, fucking missed.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Think about Triss, never miss.
You see the beefy one that you were attacking hard one now looks less beefy than the one that attacked moonshine
And one fell swoop. I knew this was happened. I knew this happened on a plan for it
Because at the end of your turn hard one day are going to use legendary actions
Here we go. Here we go. I just out of interest. Did you guys have a hero's feast?
I don't think you did.
So?
No, we didn't.
I thought maybe it would be kind of broken and I didn't want to do it.
Well, you should have done, because I was...
I was ready for you.
Now, I'm joking.
I need everyone to hold me to wisdom, save, please, including Paw Paw.
Okay.
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Okay, that's it for me, go team pants, and enjoy the show.
What about everyone?
I just quit for Papa!
Yes! Nice! What does Papa get for Papa? Wait, what does Papa get to wisdom? What about everyone? I just quit for pop-up!
Nice!
What does pop-up get to Wisdom?
Plus one, so 21.
I'm bad at Wisdom, saves.
That's a seven.
Jasper, do I need to roll?
You do not.
Great, hopefully, in the room.
You are not here.
I got fucking Nat one.
That's so crazy.
I quit for pop-up and then Moonsh, I got a Nat one. I'm so crazy. I could play for Papa and then Moon Shirt got another one.
I'm trying to think if that's worth Chrono shifting
because I think we're just all probably gonna fail this.
I have really good wisdom.
I have a plus 12.
I'll Chrono shift Moon Shirt.
I only got a 15.
19, baby.
What do you get to win?
20, then a one and 19.
My wisdom is plus 12.
So that becomes a 31 for moonshine.
Okay.
And a 21 for pop-up, but he crit.
Cool.
Hard one, we might as well shoot for the moon.
Also, Hard one, you have luck points.
Oh.
I mean, I have, there's no, I can't save unless I crit.
I add zero to wizard.
Okay, yeah, that would be enough to save.
Okay, yeah, there's no point in doing anything then.
For all of your role-ushioness hard one and the obscene amount of damage that you just did,
the creature now you see it cruel, it seems to crawl like into your mind, takes
that memory of the tris, as the tris grows like bigger than you in the hot tub
and just turns, looks around at you and says,
who was a cute little boy?
And you are suddenly frightened, you are terrified right now.
This is how I remember the hot tub all of a sudden.
I was scared then!
I gotta get that room.
Um, beautiful, so yeah, you, um,, you know you don't get Bev Zora.
With Bev Zora you might have saved, but cool.
So you are frightened, Moonshine you are fine,
Boundal you are frightened, Papa, I'm afraid,
is also frightened.
Right.
Okay, so you have the frightened condition,
which just to clarify, that is disadvantage on ability text, attack rolls, if you are within frightened condition which just to clarify that is disadvantage on ability tax attack roles
If you're within line of sight of the creature and the creature you cannot willingly move closer to the creature got it sweet. It is
It's finally time for Beverly you can hear now. Whoo sounds a very small
Why does harbour keep saying trists what's going on in there?
Yeah, sounds like banners are really steamed I got to get in there
Okay, how far away am I rough?
I will be fair and say that you are like in your distance. You're like
60 feet away from this shutter,
this big metal shutter.
I will, for the purposes of this, allow you,
if you roll me a religion or an icon or whatever is higher for you,
if you want to, I will allow you to use Misty Step.
Oh! To get through the shutter.
To get through the shutter, yeah.
But you have to roll a save, basically,
because it's hard to do, but you're in a very small form. to get through the shutter. To get through the shutter, yeah. But you have to roll like a save basically,
because it's hard to do,
but you're like in a very small form.
So I'm fudging it a little bit,
but you know, it's more fun to have you.
You don't have to fudge it.
I think I can find a way through.
Okay, if you've got a way through, then go for it.
I mean, I was just gonna like try and like
go through the keyhole or something.
I don't have a great way through, but,
yeah, I'll take your mercy here.
Sweet.
Yeah. Yeah. The shutter was designed to keep out small things, so.
Oh right, okay.
Cool.
All right, cool.
I'm going to roll.
This is just a check.
Yeah, yeah.
Religion on, I'll kind of whatever is better for you.
Fuck.
That's just going to be a 14. 14? I will say that is enough. How was the distance? I'm
Missy step
Missy step can go right yeah, cool
So I will say if you run forward 30 feet like use your movement to run forward
You can then like bamfully literally just get in like your butt get shaved off a little bit as you through the
Oh, there's no butt to shave literally just get in, like your butt gets shaved off a little bit as you threw the um...
Oh there's no butt to shave.
Yeah, yeah, it would have done.
If you had any like junk back there, it would be gone now.
Zero, sir.
I don't know, it's a junk free zone.
Cool.
It's like a contact lens.
So I do believe that you are, that you have an action left?
Yes. So just so you can see, the shut you have an action left? Yes.
So just so you can see the shutters have come down.
You see all this arcane electric energy piling into like one specific point
somewhere in the middle of the room.
You can see your tiny friends standing on Papa fighting these like
spectral creatures.
And it's it's look it's it's it's it's it's it's look like a tough fight.
So yeah, oh, look, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's. Beautiful. I'll say that you do like a little like it's like the rabbit when they get happy.
They do a little drum thing and then you like kind of just you then bound forward.
So you said it was 60 feet so I'm 60 feet over to them now.
Great. I'm in the fray. I'm gonna go in action search, which was my techno-roommia ability.
Sweet damn.
Oh yeah.
Sweet damn.
Which one are you going after?
There's three currently, and one that's above them,
kind of like hovering with it's seemingly getting kind of
like fucked up by this like arcane tethers
that are currently like ripping it apart.
Does it look like the one above them is like,
these figures are like emanating from that one in some way?
They do look like they're emanating from that one, yes.
Okay, then yeah, I'll probably,
if I can, I'll try and get up there.
What I'm gonna do for my action
is I'm going to activate my elder champion form,
which is my like level 20 paladin ability.
Okay.
So you see, flowery antlers grow out of my face
and my hair gets long and green and mossy.
Yeah, I'm just gonna activate this form.
I get 10 hit points back,
but then I'm just ready for the next round.
Sweet.
Okay.
We are now at Mojang.
Hey, I'm back.
Where's the winner to miss?
This one in the middle, super scary.
That's the point where I'm genuinely,
and this one over here was mean to me.
It's the point.
By the way, since I back,
everyone gets the advantage of my aura of courage,
which means that anyone within 30 feet of me
cannot be frightened.
Mm, sick.
Oh, rad.
Okay, so I'm thinking that,
so I'm guessing in a situation where I try to use something like shape change. That's like a crazy
A crazy check for it to not fuck up, right?
It's like super crazy and you get like a pretty good plus to nature
So the thing is you remember like there is good stuff that happens as well
Like there is a potential for good stuff to happen like before you got plus twos to attacks and damage bonuses, that's all possible.
We have some.
Colonel shifts and stuff.
You have your important roles.
Well, I use my port general.
Oh, yeah.
I want to keep the trism.
I'm so glad that was going to be useful.
It's really funny.
Fuck me.
So what would happen?
We're in a tiny room, right?
How would something like shape changing into a dragon?
How would it, like, would moonshine know how,
it's, am I gonna turn into a giant dragon
and break the entire room?
Am I gonna turn into a ratio size,
like a scaled size dragon?
Yeah, so I based on what you've seen already,
unless you've got like ridiculously unlucky on the roll,
there might be a possibility you turn it to a full size dragon,
but the likelihood is you turn into like a scale to scale dragon.
So Munchine is sweating with her 57 hit points,
really needs to boost it and also needs to get to that lever to try to change it
So she is going to try to cast a ninth level shape change
I need a next check from you please
Come on moonshine you got this come on
Let me just find Mike. I have to picture the number what's the what's the Penta Creedens voice?
Can we get a little come on from Penta Green? Yeah?
So I said Penta greens Penta greens
I'm in a bad way
Hey, how are you doing down here?
Oh, we're doing all right, here we go boys over
I don't know if you've ever played Dave Reckoning 2 on GameCube
It's a great WWE game
Oh my god, you're going to get your games
Someone in the gym who's like
like, can I get annoyed at PenderGreens?
Oh, sorry, sorry, I'm excited
I'm trying to get a match started.
I'm supposed to hit start game.
What's going on?
Yeah, no, no, pender greens.
Can you just pause that for a second?
Because I just need you when we right now.
It's not allowed.
I need you to pause.
She is.
Incredibly difficult role.
And I need your strength, your wisdom, your guidance,
your energy drinks.
I want you to think real hard.
What's Spellery wanna cast?
I want to cast Shape Change.
I want you to think of the fricking sickest
just like Buffist Dragon you've ever fucking seen.
Just like huge fucking packs. Just like, as they cover your fucking seen. Just like us. Yeah. Huge fucking packs. Just like
that they cover your fucking face. Yeah. And then I want you to
imagine triceps triceps. So big that you absolutely could not
possibly reach behind your back to scratch your back. And then
the biceps are a little bit smaller because that's two muscles
instead of three. But they're still freakin huge your stand
What about the tail?
The tails I don't think the tail is a muscle it might be
Sorry to have
Also, you're not interested in
Yeah, I'm an upper body guy, right?
Yeah, yeah, okay, what about the abs?
The abs?
You know my feeling on abs.
You don't need them.
Absolutely, don't need them.
They're glamour, not functional arms.
Shoulders, back, shoes, right?
Think about it.
It's so big.
With pender greens,
you're all echoing in my head.
You fully have advantage.
You fully have advantage.
Ha ha!
Okay!
16 with advantage plus seven becomes a 23.
Does that do it?
The DC for this
26 I'm afraid
Can we chrono shift
All right chrono shift
We'll have to get better than a 16 mark. I have to warn you about 20 Three you can do this. can do this, but shine. 23 with a 16.
Come on.
Come on.
20.
No.
I got a six.
No.
Whoa.
Well, we are D6.
Let's see what happens.
Okay.
Okay, good thing.
It could be a good thing.
Yeah.
Hopefully again.
Three.
It was not. Oh thing. Let's be hopeful here again. Three. It was not.
Oh no.
Oh, okay.
Here's what I'll say.
You fire, you go to fire off the spell
and you watch as the spectral form that is your fighting.
Oh no.
It's form starts to change
As the one that you're fighting starts to morph into an ancient lecture No
Look at me talk me through it. Pindagrees. What did you do? Someone? Someone attack me so that I lose concentration on this spell
Fuck my life
Up And I can get here if you can get here. That'd be really fucking great
Right now
But thank God, hardworn still has meppers of truth.
You're gonna say it just-
I give you a crooked thumbs up.
Oh my gosh.
Oh my god.
That dragon's tail is so skinny.
It's not gonna look to its tail.
I don't understand.
You see that the creature is like fully not happy though.
They're like, this form is not perfect
Just flawed
Fine
Oh, man unbelievable at least hard one still remembers the trash moons you shine incorrectly, but still you know
I lost my ninth level spell, but I
Will say this if you roll well enough on this table
You will get your ninth level spell back just saying
Please
We are now it is the if that's everything from you moon shine
We are now the one that is fighting you Balnor
I believe I need you to roll me a deception or an encyclopedia
All right, let's see here inside. It's pretty good. Oh
23
Unfortunately, they were all a 17 and they get mad classes to this so I need to offer me a memory please battle law
Oh, no, I'm kind of happy for I'm happy for bowlaw to be
Assessing because you're the only one that's been like sensible. I feel like you could have actually fully
Part of this together having heard the word sacrifice and progress like all are all like so many times
I feel like I
Moonshine tried to be sent. I think I saw did maybe a split.
I'll split the difference.
I think, I think Balnor thinks back to the night
before they fought Dialla and kind of the party
and going in like pranking Scoutmaster Denny with Bev
and then going at partying with hard one
in moonshine, and then the next day like everybody kind of seeing them off before they go into
battle.
I thought you were going to think about the sucky by time with moonshine and smugglers
bounty.
No, I'm not like that, Beverly. LAUGHTER
And just give me a one words, how would Balnor describe this memory?
Sweet.
Mmm-hmm.
Okay.
The creature looks at you and says,
Mmm, you were prepared to sacrifice so much for the progress of Bohemia.
Hmm.
This is good.
This pleases us.
You see that one gets sucked back into the creature and is gone.
Oh!
Whoa! I'm sorry I attacked you.
That was my bad.
Has it disappeared?
It's totally okay, don't worry.
All right.
And but unfortunately, that memory is good.
Oh.
That's what I'm saying.
This is fucked up shit.
This is fucked up shit.
Yeah.
Bounder, what's with the thousand year old stare?
Are you okay?
Yeah, I'm just thinking about how freaking rude it was that we went off to fight the ally and everybody was just like
Like we just had a super-own-of-endful night. We just like
Dinner and then we
Classic fucking Maribel behavior
You fully
You about all you fully just remember waking up like the morning of the theater fight having just sat in your chair all night
And like no one came over to say
No, it's a member but nobody can remember it differently man, I did
We know
Without you like for sure, for a team monster.
We, yes, we party, but you were there, you know.
I would have had pretty much anywhere.
I look at the butt heavies.
You can still see the skin art.
That's what's really still in your memory.
I was in the state of the butt heavy on the floor
from Ellie, and you're just like,
this explains so much. I report Sportsore's hard-worn in moonshine.
I'm like, he wants there, right?
I just, I feel like he was there?
Maybe not.
Honestly, I don't recall.
Yeah, I gotta be honest, there's an event for me.
Yeah, you guys looked up.
You definitely didn't care about Belnor that night.
That's so funny.
I got some real specific pungent memories
that don't involve Belnor.
Ha, ha, ha, ha. Specifically that he wasn't there. I got some real specific Pungent memories that don't involve Balnor
Specifically that he wasn't there moonshine speaking of
This is now the turn of the ancient white dragon the radiant
Ancient white dragon that is in front of you I'm gonna need you to go ahead and do a constitution saving throw
You see that like looking around like how does this?
How does this?
What's it? What's that?
Huh?
and just hold some breath of fire
Sorry of some ice some ice breath. Oh 15 plus six will become 21
Emily, do you want to go and have a look at the cold breath?
If you could just tell me what the DC for cold breath is.
22, maybe 22.
I am so sorry.
Alright, do your worst.
I will.
I'm absolutely down.
That is.
Oh no.
She changed what's supposed to be like a way to heal myself.
And instead it hurt me.
You see this, you see this ball of cold starts building up
and it's mouth is like what is happening?
What is this is very impure?
This is not how it is supposed to.
This is my spell and I want to see my magic do its thing.
You want this?
Are you sure? This feels really bad.
You do you. This feels really bad for you.
It's going to be really bad, but you do you.
It's going to be really bad.
Tell you what.
Sound super-sacrificed you today.
You're just willing to take this?
This is the nature of the game.
You became an ancient white dragon. You live that out. You're just willing to take this? This is the nature of the game.
You became an ancient white dragon.
You live that out.
This will be kind of fun.
Oh!
Ah!
Just fully ice breathed, Moonshine.
You just full limp on top of Pa Pa just frozen in place.
Like, like, like, like some sort of statue.
Fun times.
The one that was fighting moonshine,
now immediately is just like, well, that was fun.
Is gonna turn around and look at you, a hard one.
And it's like, do you need a hand
to like the other one of itself?
Do you need a hand?
They're fine, They're good.
The dragon, the ancient... Oh wait, this will turn back now into itself because I believe
concentration has well untruthy been broken. Oh, concentration is gone to that. Why dragon's
gone?
I know this thing does as much damage and doesn't have to recharge it. So like it's arguably
worse. But this thing now just fully turns and others over to hard one like oh this it looks like you're having fun with this one
There was nothing was nothing has been fun about this at all
It is now the one that was fighting you hard one this one looks at you and says you know what time it is and I need a memory from you hard one
Hmm, okay I need a memory from you, hard one. Hmm. Okay.
Memory, hard one, please.
So.
There was one time when my bird caught up.
Oh my God.
No, I'm gonna, I will, in the spirit of,
like if I had a sense of the type of thing
that Bale Norr thought of.
I think it's fair to say that you,
even a hold one, surely is grasping
something of what is going on right now.
Okay.
Then I'm gonna think of the moment on the airship
in Glatoron when Olcab fell on was on Death's door
and sprung back to life thanks to Matthias of House.
Oh, the Thias of House, Cret.
Go ahead and roll me in a subtle deception, hot one.
You would forget Matthias.
I mean, I rolled the floor, so.
Oh, yeah, cool.
It's not.
I don't even need to find my modifier, do I?
That memory begins to fade away. As suddenly you're like,
the thighs of House.
Is Cobb dead?
Do I even appreciate anybody's Cobb died?
No, I've seen him since.
Maybe he's dead.
Oh no.
It kills me to do this hard one, but Chrono Shift.
There you go.
Oh, that's a good one.
That was an 18. Oh, that's a good one. That was an 18.
And you have luck points.
Oh yeah.
Just reiterate you have,
sorry, do you want me to do it?
No, no, it's too late.
All right, that's 23.
They got a 22.
They rolled super low.
Super low, you maintain that memory.
What is a one word descriptor for this memory please?
Regeneration.
Ooh, if this thing could smile, it looks you and goes,
hmm, regeneration.
Much like redemption for you, hard one, in this exact moment.
And it gets sucked back into the other version of itself.
Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.
It is now...
Baallaw.
It is your turn.
There is still one fighting...
There's still one attacking hard one.
Two of them are gone, one left, and the one that's above you right now getting.
I think I'm scared of the one that is attacking hard one.
I guess what the heck can I do? Oh, here's what I will do. What a wild thing.
What a wild way to use this.
Hell yes, okay.
I have, as a purple dragon knight,
I have a ability called Rally and Cry.
So even though I am at full health,
I am going to use a bonus action to second win.
And when you use a second win feature,
you can choose up to three allies so you can see,
or hear you within 60 feet to regain 20 HP.
Hell yeah.
So I bring new jog guys.
Oh yes.
That's absolutely.
I wake up and I say,
Boundlord, there's something about today.
You have just been level headed, smart, cool,
calm, collected. Thank you
Thanks thanks thanks. Thanks, which I'd finally somebody notices it feels like a full-engaged
For once you from above you just here. I have to agree of all of you
Truly the closest
Progress progress truly
Usually usually I feel so distracted and today it's just different.
Well you only had that one beer.
That's your great yeah.
I only was in one beer bath.
So that's 20 HP to all of you guys.
So you guys look at 20.
Oh, amazing.
Amazing.
And then let's see if I can do anything.
Yeah, I'm afraid of this thing.
You're not afraid of it anymore because of my aura.
Oh.
No one can be frightened.
Damn, you will come at Ben Brunzand and you will just go,
huh.
They see it can't grow.
And they're like just excited.
Suddenly I'm not that scared.
I guess I'll just, in that case, I'll use a hellbacked
and can I basically just prep an action to be like,
whoever it seems like this spirit is going up against,
I'll give a hell-backed to whatever they're safe is.
Hell yes, you definitely can.
You definitely can.
Hot one, it is your turn.
Hop through your fears, everyone.
So am I, I'm no longer frightened.
No, you're not frightened.
No, no, no, no.
All right, great.
So I'm gonna, I'm gonna attack the thing in front of me with the, you won't. No, no, no, no. If I'm all right, great. So I'm gonna, I'm gonna
attack the thing in front of me with the... You're still attacking hard one. That's weird.
I definitely thought we were on a level now, everyone. Oh, I see, I see. I know, I've
seen it to your souls. Part of my health action is going hard on me hard only like read the freaking room man. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha You don't need to judge me. Kangaroos are an abomination on the evolutionary timeline.
You make no sense.
Where did you come from?
How do you have a pouch?
Why are you a marsupial?
Ah!
You're in a first revolution.
At least I'm not a monotree.
I don't lay eggs or anything.
Why do you all pay me well?
It's so inefficient.
Hey, there's nothing wrong with laying eggs.
Can you understand?
Do you enjoy it?
Do you enjoy your lay eggs? It's a serious thing. Crick elves? Look, I'm saying Crick elves are very creative and how we reproduce
We have an arsenal you already hear folks. It's can and so I'm gonna use my turn then to just
To grab Beverly in this in Evo and face them and say you guys have to you should just work this out and I guess
and Evo, I face them and say, you guys have to, you should just work this out.
And I guess I'll lend Beverly a help action
for any save you have.
Amazing, okay.
We will jump through to this moment,
because it's actually, it's your turn next, Bev.
And then it is the, that Evo's turn.
So I need you to offer me a memory, please.
Well, in fact, fact actually let's roll first
Roll me insight or deception please
Mmm, is this a save no that's going to be just 13 you can roll with advantage. Oh
Really? Yeah, oh, yeah, you've got so much help right now. You've got you have two helps put your hands in the pouch guys
Absolutely, I'm in You've got so much help right now. You've got, you have two helps. Put your hands in the pouch, guys. Ah!
Absolutely, I'm in. My head was already there.
What if at your, the worst thing you could reach in and fail,
that's what you all individual fail.
Oh no.
Wow.
It's like a gack that's gone bad.
Ah!
Ah!
Ah!
I don't know what that is.
Ah, that's still just a 15, unfortunately.
Unfortunately, they do be a 15.
So, please offer a memory.
Oh no.
I think Bev thinks about the first time
that he scraped his knee
at a green teen event, and Erlin came over
and put his hand on it and healed it up
and showed him how to do touch hands.
Okay, and just a one word descriptor for that memory.
Safe.
Safe, okay, cool.
Evo looks at you and says,
through your pertany, sacrifice,
you allowed progress with someone else.
This pleases me.
They get pulled back into the creature,
at which point, we're effectively out of combat.
The creature now is still getting pulled apart
by these arcane tendrils that are attached to it,
and it's looked at you and is like, with panic,
well, it doesn't have a face,
so I guess it doesn't look at you with panic.
It is more panic in a very calm voice,
where it's like, I have looked through your memories.
I do not believe you did this.
Please, if there was any way that you can help,
I would be greatly appreciated.
Can I cast control wins to try and,
like, put the lever right?
Is this person suffering because of the lever-
Is it right?
Oh, we're out of an issue.
Yes, we're out of an issue. Yes, we're out of initiative
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure you can do that. I miss you me. That's like a level one right?
No, it's a level five. It creates an up draft. Okay, cool go ahead and roll if we're out of initiative
I have my reaction so I can counterspell if it goes poor
Which I wish I could have done with the adult dragon, but I'd use my reaction to you taking attacks.
I couldn't.
So yeah, I'm gonna try to cast a fifth level spell
to create an updraft to blow the lever up.
Sweet, okay, go ahead and make this roll.
I believe you need a 15 or higher for this.
18 on the day.
Yes!
This one is fun!
Okay, so let me describe to you what happens in this moment.
The lever goes up.
You see now as the shutters go up,
you see behind the shutter, the little clock that was on the wall,
is now like two minutes to midnight.
Right?
Ah, let's... Okay, now we should minutes to midnight. Right? Ah, let's, okay.
Now we should really do something.
Yeah, so you know how we kind of did you a solid?
Maybe it could go both ways.
This shot just go up.
You see, evo immediately, like the tendle stop,
and it immediately like, it seems fighting you guys
and trying to fight off whatever this thing was,
it is exhausted.
As it suddenly zips through
the air and standing at the entrance to the ballroom, you see the Baron Terrace Pond grabs Perfectly now and so weak actual absorbance power marvellous. Thank you for your service
And before I can see that look in your face moonshines
He kind of gestures of the wing out of the window you look out where the all the pots are and you see a bunch of
You look out where the all the pots are and you see a bunch of the nobility are
Standing with like a bunch of the pots in their hands ready to like pour them out
So like all of the cities
Right now they're just gonna like if they if anything goes wrong They're just fully gonna dump them out. It's so much progress
And you see he's like it's all good. I'll back out. I've got what I want
I will leave with this creature and
My friends will put the pots down. You don't want your little friends getting hurt now do you cuz they all almost certainly die
And he sees just slowly taking steps back out of the room
What do you mean are we allowed to try to cast those?
Oh, we're allowed to do whatever the hell you want to do, yeah.
In fact, can I have a, ask a question?
Yes, please, please.
What happened to Evie and Dodo?
Are they still in the room?
I will say, yeah, I'll say Evie, I'll say Dodo
was just fully hiding underneath pop on the whole time.
Like as soon as this thing came out,
Dodo just fully scrambled.
And I will say that, yeah, I guess Evie probably
should have been in part of the fight.
So I will say Evie was doing her own battle,
and she figured out way quicker than you guys.
So like, she was then running back towards you guys
trying to help out, but at the time you got there,
you found Evie going to the doubt.
So she was off doing her own battle with her own ebo, so
Yes, okay great good work. You be
How close to another one of these parted trees am I?
Well, there's one like because I still have tree straight active. Oh, it's like still running
Yeah, okay, this is fun. I'm gonna say the plant that you spout out accidentally
earlier is right next to the Baron Terrace pond.
And you are near one of the others that's on a plinth.
The one that it fired out of in the first place,
you're near that one.
So I say like, okay, all right, you know what?
It's not worth it.
We're gonna leave.
And I run over to the plinth
and I touch the tree and it gets sucked into my pouch
and then blasts towards this one.
Ah!
Ah!
Okay.
I'd also like to cast Pauline Morphin the Duck
to try to turn, I mean this one
to try to turn it into a dolphin.
I'm like, I am a swan!
That's tricky.
I'll make him roll a deck, say, with disadvantage.
He rolled a not one fucking brilliant ball.
This tree comes out, whoof, takes him out fully.
However, you now see in this instant, all of the nobles outside see the barren suddenly
fall over for no reason through the window and begin tipping
these pots
They're gonna like they're getting ready to drop the pots
well well
wait
Yeah, what did you say we cut we cannot hear you can I finally do my reverse gravity so that all the pots that start falling out
Don't actually hit the ground
Okay, okay, this is a big roll everyone come on
We'll absolutely say you can give the help action. So this is a level seven.
So the DC for this will be,
let me see, a 20,
24, you get a plus seven.
So I need to hit a seven.
Does anybody have anything? You need to hit a seven to eat it. Does anybody have anything?
You need to hit a seven to eat.
Can I trade two of my three luck points
for her to roll with disadvantage?
Disadvantaged.
Disadvantaged.
Disadvantaged.
I need a disadvantage.
I need a disadvantage.
How?
Disadvantaged now.
No.
I will be, here we go.
I will be, I will be, both Beverly and Hard One,
roll me a nature check.
Okay.
That is a 12.
All you need was a Baba 10.
Oh, that is a 14 for me.
Okay, both of you in this place
can see the level of destruction that is about to happen
and you find, you're trying desperately You can see the level of destruction that is about to happen.
And you find, you're trying desperately to dig deep,
to think of some way that you can aid moonshine.
You both call out towards Melora, to aid moonshine in this moment.
And you hear a very faint like,
oh, she's a little hot under the collar,
because she's back in the island, everyone.
So I would love to see a break from the indifference for this.
I'm gonna give you from each of them a plus two to this role.
Oh nice.
So you now get a plus 11 in total.
So I believe you need to hit a 13, is that right?
It's a 24 to save.
Yes, so I have to hit a 13 or higher.
And you roll with a bounce edge
because Balor is giving you the hellpaction.
Great.
Oh man.
Hey, come on, Mochette.
You got this.
19!
Yeah!
Here's the views.
Woo!
Oh my god, I was just going to seven, so thank you, Boundor,
because I would not have made it up.
Oh, and I was fully astrayal, more of the steady.
I made this whole world, and I was about to dump it out on the floor.
Oh, please don't dump out your world.
Um, so you see, they all drop the trays and start running.
You get the idea that these gnomes are an idiots.
Like they are not the most intelligent people in the world.
These gnomes just want to say if they're own bacon.
They start running as you see moonshine.
Like you see she extends out her hands,
Beverly and hard one.
You grab hold of her shoulder and kind of do the,
you give her like a part of your strength.
As you see, vines grow from the floor and catch the pots.
Like, they fully just catch the pots,
and you see that now, as you look down over the pots,
there's like levels, as all the pots are making this glorious,
kind of almost like amphitheatre style thing around the inner circle
So there's like these glorious vines now holding these kind of cities like a loft in the sky
Um, can I make a can I clock where these gnome nobles are running to just so I can systematically go around town and kick the shit out of them
Is at this moment that you see
Evo looks up and just like speaks in all of your heads like if someone can offer me literally
some any points of healing, I might be able to help.
I do have a heal, but it would be another role and I just I feel like I'm focusing on the reavers gravity.
So Beverly goes over and will cast a fifth level cure wound.
Oh, be you, tough hole.
Beverly, give me one last roll.
I'll say the Baron is fully knocked out
on the floor right now.
This high purpose we gave this Baron 11 hit points
so no matter what you did, pretty much, you killed it.
Right, because he's the worst.
So this is a religion check.
This is a religion check.
I mean, if anyone wants to give the help action,
they all welcome to.
Yeah, sure.
Hard one, I'll let you run over with Bev off to helping.
My pat him on his very flat ass.
Come on, cave, my God.
You know what?
We've been thinking about Melora a lot today,
but Arathas is also getting lucky.
So I'm gonna get first shout out.
Yes.
With advantage. Oh, that is also getting lucky. So I'm gonna get for a shout out. Yes With advantage that is a net 20
Fuck yes, you extend out the spell you see evo starts to glow brightly as you hear a evo goes
Thank you, mother. And as she calls out to Arathas, and as thank you for the aid,
Eva looks at you and goes,
ooh, 10 seconds left.
I think we should correct this,
as Eva brings her hands up.
And-
With our final 10 seconds, I looked a hard one.
I say, this is our chance,
and then I go to make out with
Even look at you and goes oh
Don't worry. They'll be plenty of time for that makes you all big turns around to you and says now
All of the nobles here are enemies of progress and have been systematically
There are enemies of progress and have been systematically abusing and hurting my people. Would you care to join me in hunting them all down and making sure they get what they deserve?
I saw where they all live.
Let's do it.
Yeah, absolutely.
I'm still steamed at hard one and I need to redirect it.
Absolutely, yeah, I'm into that.
You fully run throughout this castle, just chasing these deprave,
and just to clarify everyone at home before,
they think that we support one slaughter.
These are the worst people.
These are corrupt meas.
These are the worst.
Also, what we're doing to them
is humiliating school yard practice.
Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
You're just sticking your head in my pouch.
Bal does just taking shit.
I walk out into the hall with a decapitated one.
You said, Craig?
Yeah.
Yeah.
You see?
Yeah, that's pretty funny prank.
Oh, that's hilarious.
I didn't know you knew Minor Illusion.
You see a monkey.
It's all the lifeless bodybuilder.
You see a little monkey with four arms and silver fur
dives in through the window.
We're going to go in. And just as hard one comes out with the headless one just throws the turd at
the head. And it's just totally sweet. That's hilarious. So you like shit here. Wow, I just
erupted with the smell of bud. Yeah, that's how it really like dev, you're not supposed to be drinking, bud.
Evo looks at you and says,
You have done a great service.
You've freed me from my captors,
and we now can do exactly what my mother's intended,
which is for Potsadonia to be a beacon, a beautiful
symbol to the world that both civilization and the wild magic of Malorik can live as one.
But you see that they go, however, you have done me a service and it would be rude of
me to not offer some sort of reward. Would you please follow me? You see a few of your friends, like Hondock, joins you as well. Evie comes with
you, Dodo comes with you. Dodo, I'll get in on them. You'll come with you. You go, you
walk into these massive double doors and there is this huge heart-shaped bed
You all clamber onto the bed as evo now
reduces you all in size once more and says don't worry. This is only temporary
As you your new friends all get to spend the night to sleep in one really, really fucking huge beds.
One big bed, one huge bed, one huge bed, one huge bed, one huge bed, one huge bed, one huge bed.
The end.
Oh, that was awesome.
That was awesome.
Jasper, I feel like I need to send you like a bottle of whiskey in the mail or something.
This has been a true treat.
A bouquet of roses.
Litchy, the second you said said the bottle of whiskey, my address was already in your
uh, your inbox.
Say lie on the show.
Say lie on the show, Jasper.
Talk to yourself, man.
Maybe everyone will send you whiskey.
Oh, okay. Maybe a man. What an absolutely cool world. Talk to yourself Maybe everyone will send you whiskey
What an absolutely cool world
There's no reason we wouldn't come back here we got to do this again
Yeah, we can literally just pick up from where we left off
Just like a little peek behind the screen. Basically, the idea is that the civil seed creates places along the evolutionary timeline. So in the middle, it's full sci-fi
in the middle of those parts. Like it's full sci-fi cities. But in the middle, it's just modern.
Absolutely. It's like where are we going now?
So there's room, you know guys,
this is a whole civilization.
I'll visit every casserole dish you have.
Yeah.
And they're all men.
They're all men.
That is.
I will say, there is.
There is a part of Jambalaya.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I was like, I was like,
the green shine, like look down on this
and she's like,
that's my soonest.
Yeah.
I feel like the sentient shrimp of the John Belire
are finally going to get the retribution if you go there.
Nice.
Sweet guys.
Thank everyone so much for listening.
Thank you to Jasper for running this fucking awesome game.
What a fun.
Jasper.
Yeah. What would you like to play?
Yes, let's go through it first of all.
I just want to say a huge thank you to everyone
who listened to this.
This was very, this was absolutely incredible.
I had so much fun.
You guys were all fucking awesome.
And just so good.
That's it.
Yeah, I got to do a shout out to the two crew on that part.
That's a cool moment.
But I would love to plug my podcast, which is three black halflings.
We are also a member of the Headgun podcast network, and we kind of do like everything.
We do a lot of DM tips and tricks and like player advice and stuff like that.
We have awesome guests, least of all, called well, and Jake.
We have much better guests than them.
We've got a worse traffic episode, Zebra.
You know, I'm usually pan, but listen to all the other ones.
They were super fun. They were super fun to have those guys on.
And, you know, hey, maybe even future guests, maybe we get them off,
and we'll just come on some time.
Hell yes, we'd love to.
But we also, yeah, so we, and then we talk a little bit about diversity and inclusion
in D&D and trying to make the worlds that we play in a little bit more fun for people
of all shapes and sizes and no offense to three of you, but you know, just not just for,
you know, white dudes who, you know, not just wait.
No, no, no, no. And then lastly, let me also do...
No offense taken by the light.
I'm gonna roll the inside check real quick.
Jacob, are you on mute or did you just stop talking?
Guys, do I say something?
Jake just got up and left.
He stormed out of the heck of office.
My phone's blowing up.
He's texting me.
I actually hate this job.
Yeah, and then we also do actual play as well.
Um, we just wrapped up on a campaign.
It's only 20 episodes long, so like, it's just like a fun thing
that you'd listen to, you'd have to listen to like a whole,
a whole huge thing.
So feel free to jump in and enjoy that.
Uh, but yeah, it's, uh, TV Halflings, uh, everywhere,
like on social media and Twitter, Instagram and Facebook,
if you wanna follow us,
or you can just download anywhere at three Black Halflings.
Oh, you also have a Patreon as well.
We played some fun games actually with Jake
and with Koldel on our Patreon,
which is patreon.com for us,
slash TV Halflings.
It was a fun game too.
It was a fun game,
it was a good luck at the Halflings.
It was very, very fun.
It's great.
That's the good thing.
But thank you so much.
Can I do a counter plug It was a very, very fun. That's great. Oh, that's a good one. But thank you so much.
Can I do a counter plug or an additional plug,
a supplementary plug?
I believe when this airs the one shot
that we did together, it was awesome.
So on this day, there should also be,
if you had over to our channel,
a one shot called Once Upon a One Shot,
which I also DM, so if you're not sick of hearing my voice
by this point, who could be? Who so if you're not sick of hearing my voice by this point.
Who could be, who parts of you could be?
I'm pretty sure my partner after 19 months of lockdown,
but otherwise, if you're not my partner,
then yeah, it's called Once Upon a One Shot
and it is a fairy tale, folklore One Shot,
in which Cold Well played with some other great guests,
including Connie from Transplanner. So yes, it was great fun
It was so fun. Yeah, please check that out. Yeah, sweet
And you guys can head on over to our patreon patreon.com slash nad pod to hear us talk
About this awesome
Awesome episode
patreon.com slash nad pod that's any ddpod don't sing yet oh
yeah
what's up
the dm right now i'm not gonna listen to you
yeah
take that sister for one
she's fucking the dickhead says sing
yeah
does anybody else have anything to plug
i'll just i'll second three, I'll second the three black apps.
Yeah, check out the four app apps.
Yeah, that's happy.
Also, it's peach and nectarine season.
So, like, go grab one.
If you're at a farmer's market,
they're tasty.
Sure.
Oh, yeah, nice.
Hell yeah.
You know what? That's awesome.
Yeah. That's awesome.
That's awesome.
That's awesome.
You're like, that's great.
I love you.
You can follow us all on social media
that we may or may not use at CHMRI with us.
Me and I call this called well at CHMRI withASME. I call this called well at J.C. Herbases' Jake, Adi Extrude is Emily and Jasper, what would you like people to follow you on?
Oh yeah, you can follow me personally if you want to, which is at JW UnderschoolCut, right?
Sweet. And you can tweet of the show!
Am I still a kangaroo?
It's the end of the show, everybody, and that means I need to shout out our benevolent
council of elders, starting with Brad D. Jeffreyes, Haldofrosstbach, Steelbreaker and Matt
M. Denizens of the enlightened inner
cities who all recently adopted kangaroo boys as pets. Thanks to them, demand a skyrocketing.
Watch out, Beverly Leap.
Jordan DJ, CutterW, Jive G, Dylan B, and Shupert the Mushroom, an offshoot of the flock of
mercy who worshiped the one who came right after the one who came before. While their
god might not be the founder of civilization, they did bring chips and dip into existence,
which is pretty clutch. Daniel the Dastardly Dame, Andrew M, Beardman Dan, Scott D and
Danny P, other cats lurking around, Baron Pond's estate, he doesn't actually like cats,
but employs them out of necessity to keep tiny thieves away from precious hordes of cocktail shrimp.
Mixologist Michael McDee, Vincent W.
Boundor's boy, Andrew B. and Kevin S. A crew of tristes who actually talk about hard
when all the time, but only because they use his name as a code word for guys who are
overcompensating for something.
Just an eye, Ragnar Fadewend, TGM the Nome Barbarian, Alaina M and Trailey the Cray Faye,
Druids who heard about Beverly's reverse tree stride and were inspired to create a new
spell called To Gold's Log Launcher.
It's great for neutralizing foes and even better at transporting people quickly down
rivers.
Jarradee, Austin Bones IMR, Damial R, Cyborg version of Josh the Cobalt and Gage M,
Pendergreens, Video Game Crew, they all desperately wanted to play Mario Party, but Pendergreens
got stuck in a puzzle in Banjo, Kazooie and split his N64 into with a giant flaming
sword.
Richard X Machina, Michael L, Sergio Salazar Solomon, Sakurai Stasekwani, Trest the travel
and Sir Carl, literal flies on the wall.
They watched the boobs entire fight against the one who came before and are now spreading
the juicy gossip about hard ones embarrassing trist revelation across all of Potsodonia.
Jury S. Daneji, Azoth Shadows, Kalamel and Jack L. a crew of Stag beetles having a stag
weekend at the Love is Love Tavern.
They're all wearing matching shirts that say Staghetti and Meatbugs, which is a really complicated inside joke that is currently
being explained to a very frustrated Han Dock.
Flawless Whale, Temporal, Sam L, Nicholas C, and Reese and S, a group of trists is that
if they were asked to think of their fondest memory would remember a hard one, but specifically
how much they had roasting him after he left the hot tub. Samuel B. Mike H.
Udish Mulek, the baby bronze dragon, Matthew E. Colton B. and Adam G.
The ones who came before, the one who came before.
They didn't actually come before Evo.
They're just a really pretentious indie pop band.
Matthew E plays the keyboard one note at a time and Colton B plays a Fisher Price's Xylophone.
Megan Ass, Mateo C, Nibbadger, Panama James, Cummins the Bard and Adrian the Halfling Bard,
the inventors of the reverse gravity spell who actually have mostly used it on Ben Affleck's
Dunkin' Donuts ice coffees.
Dan, Grace G, Drew Nasty, C.C. Lulu and Barnesinator, the extended cat family of the black cat who
are cordially invited to live in Murph and
Emily's backyard, please.
Michelle O. Timmiar, Jonathan W. The Crock-Waring Warrior, Lucas B and Aron S. The Moth Air Force
sure they're not as showy as the Dragon Fly Brigade, and yes, they fill the air with dust
and their mounts have creepy eyes, but damn it, they can get to a porch light faster than
anyone else. It's Kevin, hugfishes above average hog, New York, Steven C, and KJ, the owners of
Boundores build the only dad Jim and Bohemia that features only weights and no treadmills
or ellipticals so you can get huge but also keep your butt heavy-gut.
Michael M, Mike K, Karen J, Ekathor 666, and Nick W, a support group for spellcasters who lost their
only 9th level spell to a wild magic surge, and reminisce finally about more stable magical
climates in which they can reliably turn into an adult dragon.
Taylor A, Matthew R, Esmeam, Nathan, Kazmir, the all-knowing, and Big Bad Beard of the
Mad, the committee for lever awareness which advocates for a new set of safety protocols with unidentified levers that require you to confirm with at least
two friends, they are not just being a naughty little shit starter when you want to pull a mysterious
lever.
Eric McD, giant monsters on the horizon, Thrath, Burley T, J Dragonborn, and Joe Rode the
inappropriate, a pack of highly evil talking cats held bent on
taking over Bahumia, moonshine and Balnor not only refused to stop them, but have offered
to join their cause.
Cody B, Liam D, the Sandrian, Ben A, Fildonis, and Dave H, the only adventurers to offer
Evo a stupider memory than hard ones they collectively recalled at a time they saw
a possum wearing a wimple. Mark T. Quallabear, Catherine S. David K. Christian S. and Dustin S. Many thrill
seekers who bungee jump off of giant shoulders. Bev's gnarly kangaroo wipeout
was only the third sickest trick they saw that day. Keith K. Conor F. The
Time Walker, Vashguard, two left eyes, and Frankie Koala, keepers of
the spray bottle, a team of elite guardians who keep cats away from dangerous levers by
spritzing them with water if only the boobs knew how to summon them.
Big Bad John, DPC is awesome.
Ashton S, Blair the Bug, Blair Barbar Blarion, Pork Chop and Chanel M, the team of family
therapists that it's going
to take to repair hard one in Balnor's relationship after this adventure.
Valacy Raptor, Minette F, Pat L, A Chuta A, Lauren H, An Elias Hawthorne,
Creators of Bohumias Famous Super Stick Pans that guarantee entire miniscivilizations
can't be casually dumped out or your money back.
Maddy-Y Alex H. The eldest berry, Evan V. Ryan S. and the bone duster.
The producers of Head Hunted with Horde 1, a prank show where hard one beheads people.
It was pulled after one episode and everyone involved was promptly thrown in the dungeon.
Joshua H. Rob Robert CRSP, Idrisil, Brent Lee C, Micah B, and Jim Bob X plays, Super Tall
Nomes were actually really bad at Nomech Basketball because they have to bend down to reach
the hoops.
Ploups, Carly Ann, Laurie P, Spam Gaming the Natsoskilled Gamer, Connor Savage and Russell
H, the unfortunate railroad workers who had to clean off all the tuna out of the cow catcher after
Belnar was hit last episode. Christopher J. Pebblepot, Loganass, Leviathan, Dimae, Bioquart 7, Remington CD,
a gaggle of trisses who witnessed hard ones hot tub experience and actually don't remember differently,
but only because they don't remember it at all. Amber K, thrill of the fright, Sullivan H, Everett P,
Treb Hopdropper, and Sydney T,
gnome teenagers who missed this party
because they were away at summer camp.
Probably best to stay there, kids.
Alex C, the element god, Lindsay W,
champwild, valon, and sprite Pepsi,
flees living on Papa who are peved that he's allowed anyone
else but them to ride him.
Karlin C. Anthony S. Tristan C. The Luce Put Up Toos Goose.
Jake Matthew J. and Scripps Grypper, Young Ruse who are all seeking to nestle in Beverly
Leap's pouch, worry not, young ones, Bouncer Lee will accept you all in there. Michael asks the bone duster, Noah, why it be, Estelle, Ghost, and Rogue Cree, Goose
tailors to Baron Pond, it takes a team to make a suit for a goose, though they don't
ever have to worry about the pants.
Danielle N. Baroness Sashon's romance partner from the Baronies.
Mr. Dude Sky, conflicted DM, Justin LB and Dandy, Elven chefs who cooked Boundorn Epic Goodluck
breakfast before he went out to fight theala and would be really pissed to learn he's
fully forgotten them.
Jennifer R, Clifton A, Richard G, M. Barber, Marcos P, and Pupp K. Lash, Dwellers of an
ASE city that was almost unceremoniously dumped onto the ground, but thankfully moonshine saved it, and now we can someday visit their purple frozen peaks.
Learns the balance druid to code a JP, Pogos, self-proclaimed Faprins, Tracy P, a very big
bed 91 and scrumpy bogpipe, gnome wrestling fans who were rooting hard one on to keep
swinging his hammer even after the non-violent strategy was revealed turns out it worked.
Nes O. Zachary R. Holly.
Anthony A. Leah C. Samuel O.
Blavans team of Wranglers who don't know what they love more.
Taming the Realms wild beasts or a well timed fart joke.
They're both so beautiful.
That's it for this week everyone.
Thank you all so much.
Thank you so much to all of our listeners, all of our Patreon subscribers, and of course all of our benevolent council of elders.
You can head on over to our Patreon Patreon.com slash nad pod to listen to our after show,
the short rest, until then, we'll see you next time.
That was a Hate Gum podcast.