Not Another D&D Podcast - C3 Ep. 57: Cold Hard Truths (The Ice Knife Saga)

Starting point is 00:00:00 This is a HeadGum Podcast. Welcome to the Campaign After the Campaign. This is Not Another D&D Podcast. Welcome back to Bohemia, everybody. Bohemia! He's so excited. Caldwell Tanner, thanks for being here. It's not your turn yet, dude. I'm so sorry, sir.

Starting point is 00:00:27 I am your dungeon master, Brian Murphy, joined by Jake Hurwitt. Bohemia! Jake, dude! Sorry! Bohemia! I'm trying to run! With Stefan on him! With your enthusiasm!

Starting point is 00:00:38 Just so ready to go! Bohemia! I worked really hard on this! Well, forget it. No, you got it! Jake ugh. Well, forget it. Fucking forget it. No, you got it. You got it. You got it.

Starting point is 00:00:47 Go ahead, go ahead. Don't let these two enthusiasms get in your way. I got this, all right? I got this, yeah. Woo, he's got this. Fighting alongside a frog and a bard with my brand new sword, shard. Yeah. Pretty good. I do feel like we built it up, brand new sword, shard. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:01:05 Pretty good. I do feel like we built it up, though, at a certain point. And there was just no way you could fully deliver. It would have been perfect if I got it out clean right up top as soon as you entered. If we did a super low energy intro. I think it was great, man. I think it was amazing.

Starting point is 00:01:18 I can't wait to hear it again. Who is this person? Then, of course, we've got Emily Axford. Who am I? Who is this person? Then of course we've got Emily Axford. Who-hah-me-ah! Hahahaha! Okay! That's the name of the world. Her character's name is

Starting point is 00:01:34 Calliope Petrichor. If for some reason, episode 57 of Campaign 3 is the first thing you've listened to. That's Emily Axford. She plays Calliope Petrichor. She did say before we started, I think, almost listens to that's Emily Axford she plays Clivey Betrcourt She did say before we started I think almost as a counter bit to Emily's bit before we started Emily said I'm not gonna do a rhyme I don't feel like it and I said wild energy to bring into the episode so called one with the opposite and went over

Starting point is 00:02:01 Enthusiastic they're just fucking with me Everything we do on the show is just an inside joke to make me upset. And now you're caught up. Yeah, now we're caught up. And then, and, Bohemia, and, and then of course we've got Caldwell Tanner. Bohemia! Yeah!

Starting point is 00:02:19 See, it feels good! It feels good! Caldwell Tanner, of course, plays Saul. Oh, Saul Buffau, I'm feeling fine. Just found out I'm two of a kind. And now I'm gonna go and find out if Swag's still alive. I'm really trying to thrive here. Bahumia.

Starting point is 00:02:37 You lost me, but you had me for a moment, and that's more than can be said for the other guys. Bahumia. Bahumia yeah. Boom, yeah. Boom, yeah, guys. Sure, hey, guys. Boom, yeah. We did it. We did it, everyone.

Starting point is 00:02:51 All right? Everyone settle. Settle. OK? Ready? All right. Let's do Elderborn. Let's do...

Starting point is 00:02:59 Not the right campaign. Not the correct campaign. Shit, sorry. Let's go ahead and do a little recap. Shut the fuck up, everyone. All right. So last time, you left Calder's home to pursue Gawain to the chamber of the ice knife, but received a call from Albin along the way. Shut up.

Starting point is 00:03:27 Shut up. Bohemia, Bohemia. Bohemia. This is precious information. Bohemia. Bohemia, Bohemia. Bohemia. Bohemia.

Starting point is 00:03:37 You guys are like Pokemon now? Okay. All right, worst bit ever. Okay. You received a message from Albin. Albin told you that he was in Frostwind trying to assemble a force because they detected the mothership submersible below the frigid north.

Starting point is 00:03:56 He also told Saul that he had followed up on his clones and learned that Saul and Swag should be the only living buffos. Wow. Next, you navigated the caverns beneath the frozen waterfall and, after getting lost for several hours, finally found two hidden doors marked on the map. One had the Eye of Grimsh, the other the Snowflake of Ariox. You saw that Gawain went through the Grimsh door, but Calli was being pulled towards the Snowflake one, so you explored that first. There you found a divination room full of carvings in the ice.

Starting point is 00:04:31 You recognized events that did happen, along with possible futures that never came to fruition. While examining the wall, you were visited by an arctic fox spirit, Lumi, the animal companion of Ariox. The fox showed you a vision of Ariox's death, where the eladrin sacrificed himself to kill Radak, a cyclops warlord who had corrupted the giant's cause. Lumi explained that the spirit behind the Grimshdor was a reflection of that moment of death, a trickster ghost named Havok. You learned that you were destined to come here to release the spirit and find the ice

Starting point is 00:05:08 knife and you also found out that Callie's mother had Ariax's gift and could see glimpses of the future. The fox explained that Havok would allow you to enter its domain because you have a connection to it and thus would be viewed as a rival instead of an out and out enemy. Lumi also revealed that the only way to break the curse would be to destroy the frozen statue of Ariox in Raidac locked in combat. Doing so would reunite Lumi and Ariox,

Starting point is 00:05:35 which greatly excited the party. Yay! After saying your goodbyes to Lumi, you headed to the Grimms store and opened it by shoving shard in the eye. Once you entered the dark chamber, you were greeted by a ghostly message in the ice that said, Friends...betray. I remember.

Starting point is 00:05:58 You remember. Good job, Em. She's back. You get a sticker. I wrote it in my notebook. Very good. Yeah. That almost makes up to your behavior for the first three minutes of the show.

Starting point is 00:06:07 You were bombarded by deadly spirits, a frozen statue of Gawain, and an invisible force casting charm spells. However, you were able to quickly win the challenge by attacking an hourglass, counting down the rounds, greatly speeding up the process. After the fight was over, Havoc wrote that you had passed the simulation, but warned you that real betrayal was ahead, as a bridge appeared towards a new archway.

Starting point is 00:06:34 You wondered aloud if Gawain had struck some kind of deal with Havoc and vowed to stop him if necessary. And that's where we are now. All right, all my real betrayal heads, get ready. Yeah. This is where it starts. Shut up. All of you.

Starting point is 00:06:51 I can't. I have to talk for another hour at least. I'm so sorry. It's all good. All right. So all of you are in this big circular cavern. It was dark while you were taking on the challenge, but there are now magical torches and braziers lighting up the outside of the room.

Starting point is 00:07:13 They burn bright and illuminate the cave. Shining off of the crystals and geodes, you see an icy bridge leading to an archway into darkness. Okay. into an archway, into darkness. Okay, um, before we go, Calder, I feel like your brother could be getting charmed or something. I have like a little thing that I can play a little counter charm. So it would just give him an advantage on saving throws if he is charmed. Anything can help. Do you guys want to enter quietly or with

Starting point is 00:07:46 maybe like a mournful dirge? I could go for a mournful dirge, it feels appropriate here. Yeah, we kind of like march in a single file line. Like a soundtrack. Should we choreograph anything? Do you want me to inflate my throat and play it like drums? Yeah, I do actually. I need it. Actually, that's part of the song. It's actually not a mournful dirge. Maybe it's like, something nostalgic, right? You know, nostalgic and sometimes bring people back to themselves. Yeah, it's a Bruce Springsteen song. Maybe like Atlantic City. Yeah. Great. So, Kelly begins playing a nostalgic ditty. So Callie begins playing a nostalgic ditty. As you guys walk across this bridge, Callie's playing a song, Saul is playing like a pitter patter on his neck as you guys play a solemn song going forward. You cross the bridge into the archway and find an icy tunnel. As you walk along the ground, the ice lights up with a cool blue glow, and you eventually find

Starting point is 00:08:46 yourself after going through the archway at a dead end with a wall of frost. And after a moment you see writing begins to appear on the wall. You see, good song. Wow. I mean, I can't turn down positive feedback. Thank you, I write underneath it. I bite my finger and then write. You see the ghost is not writing in blood right now,

Starting point is 00:09:17 but you write back in blood. And you see the ghost writes back, I can hear you. You don't need to write to me. Right, but that's an autograph. You should treat it with respect. And you see the ghost writes back I can hear you Right, but that's an autograph you should treat it with respect you see the blood disappears into the wall. I'll take it I'll ponder that later you see the ghost writes into the ice well done I accept you as challengers for the ice knife. Is it like a battle of the bands? You see dot dot dot. Sort of. Oh, okay. It's like a battle of the bands in that you can think of it as a competition against me and anyone else that

Starting point is 00:10:06 might be here dot dot dot. Are there other contestants? Yes. Who else is in there? You know. Shit. Was there like an emoji attached to that? Like a winky face?

Starting point is 00:10:20 There was a winky face. Okay, there was a winky face. All right. Damn it, guys. Gowan is really good at theinky face. Okay, there was a winky face. All right, damn it guys. Gowen is really good at the saxophone Okay, well there's no use delaying this let's get this on right you see the spirit writes fair enough You will face your next challenge alone

Starting point is 00:10:39 Will the person we're fighting? be participating willingly? Dot, dot, dot. It's typing. Shit, it stopped typing. Wait, unsend our message. It pops up again.

Starting point is 00:10:56 Wait, now it's typing again. Now it's typing again. Dot, dot, dot. Did it read our Malon's message? Or read receipts on? Sort of. Sort of. Sort of. Keep that counter charm ready, Callie. Yeah, okay. But I'm kind of wondering what they meant by alone. Oh, you're right. Okay. If that's a case, I'll give you each a bardic so that I can still be with you. Oh, thank you. Should we... Do we go in one at a time?

Starting point is 00:11:28 Are we going in together? You see the wall cracks and you hear movement as it shifts, creating four paths. They are covered in fog and you cannot see beyond it. Four paths. Four paths. Four paths, four of us. Oh, right.

Starting point is 00:11:44 Remember I'm here too, hi everybody. Okay, let's just get that. I know, I just, I didn't want you to go on your own. Here, take a Bartek. Oh, thank you, Ms. Betracore. Okay. And here, take a Squire inspiration. I really liked your song.

Starting point is 00:12:00 Thank you. And, can I have an egg? An egg, oh right, that bit. Yes, I have a bag of eggs. Pulled from the never ending bag of eggs. I don't know, sometimes you talk like a jaded comedian. Do you have a secret second life that we don't know about? No, no.

Starting point is 00:12:18 She hands you an egg. Thank you. Okay. I don't really have anything to give except, Kali, if you need a little more magic in your reserve, I could maybe try and transfer some. Okay. Yeah. So rubs his palms together inflates his fist. And it's just going to give you like a big palm strike transfer some key. I feel so strong. How much do you need? Yeah. How much are you giving her? How much does one key, is it?

Starting point is 00:12:45 It's key per spell level, right? Yeah, that's what we said. Oh, don't give me four key. Actually, I don't have anything under four. Well, he can get his key back during short rest, right? Yeah, so you should use that. All right, I'll give you four. Four, wow.

Starting point is 00:13:00 Okay, so you feel this transfer of power from Saul, this organic energy that makes you feel more emboldened and more alive and you feel more of your internal power. You feel like you could summon more Starfire for Smites. And you guys do have time to take a little short rest if you want to use Hit Die from your last challenge. I definitely do. Will my key come back on that?

Starting point is 00:13:29 Your key does come back, yes. So you can kind of, you can cheese it for this moment. I'll say that before the short rest, you give some of your key to Kali and then you'll get your key back after the short rest. Okay, cool, nice. So you guys all take a moment, patch up your wounds. You guys all stand in front of like your individual hallways,

Starting point is 00:13:49 having just given each other what strength you can lend to each other. Calder, is there anything I can give you? You know the ways of magic too. Yeah, I don't think I need anything, but you can take these knit boots just cause they're- Ha ha ha ha ha! Because I love them so much and they're distracting me because I keep on, yeah, thinking about

Starting point is 00:14:09 how I just want to go be cozy and put them on. Right. Sure, sure, sure. Okay. I've noticed that, that you keep looking at them distracted. All right. Well, that's great because I actually made you this really warm gator for you to wear over your neck.

Starting point is 00:14:23 Oh, perfect. you this really warm gator for you to wear over your neck. Oh perfect, I'm about to go face my brother. And now I don't have to do it without a gator. What's a gator? What's a gator? Like the animal? No, it's like, you know, it's one of those little like mini scarves that just goes around your neck and you can pull it up over your mouth.

Starting point is 00:14:40 It's like a little tube that goes around your neck. So it's like you're being eaten by a gator? I'm going to pretend to fall and then have my sword slice it off. Oh my god! Oh no! I was overcome by a gator. Give me an attack roll to not enroll high, or else you're going to slice Calder's neck.

Starting point is 00:15:08 That's way too close. It's worth the risk. 19 out of 10, baby. You got it perfectly. Slashes it. Perfect trickster move. Oh my gosh. Kelly, you clutz.

Starting point is 00:15:20 Oh my god. Calder's going to reach after it and just kind of grind it against the ice. Knock it into the fog. It falls down Kenna's hallway. You can still use it as a tea towel. Wait, I'll retrieve it for you, Mr. Kilby. Don't, it's too dangerous, Kenna.

Starting point is 00:15:36 Okay, all right, I will. Please, we've already lost the walking we love. You got it, I understand. I won't go after it. All right, don't worry. So where's your bag of yarns? Sacrifices have to be made. I understand, I won't go after it. Alright, don't worry. So where's your bag of yards? Sacrifices have to be made.

Starting point is 00:15:47 Yeah, I trip then onto the bag of yards. No! And light it on fire? No! Oh no! My torch! You hit the flint with your sword and it lit a fire! What have I done?

Starting point is 00:15:59 The flint is so dangerous. Oh, that was... Okay, that's fine. I'm sure there's a craft store nearby. The Feywild's gotta be full of them Callie with that swift move with getting a 19 on the dice So getting like essentially like a 30 on your attack roll and I'll add that to you you have like great, like even like passive deception. You do see on the wall in the direction that you're facing, so like away from those guys,

Starting point is 00:16:31 you see written in the wall, very good. Very good. We're being judged, we're being evaluated. What did this spirit like about that? Did it like kind of the chaos? I guess the havoc that we caused? Yeah, so I think that's what it liked. The unintentionality of the movement.

Starting point is 00:16:57 Yeah, maybe it just- Just how random it all was. It was so random. I feel like that was so random. I think the spirit likes really random stuff. Such random humor. Zombies, robots. Bacon. I'm a minor illusion of Corgi with sunglasses on. Eating a pizza.

Starting point is 00:17:22 Yarr. The ghost does not respond, but Kenna laughs really hard. Weird. Ah, that's hilarious. I'm sorry. I am kind of endeared by it. Okay, but where, which path do we want to send the serpents down? Hmm.

Starting point is 00:17:40 Well, I think that Licorice will come with me, and, uh, Honeysuckle can go with you, Calder. I'll take Honey. Yeah. Nom nom nom. Yeah. There you go. Does that sound good? Yeah. That's cool with me.

Starting point is 00:17:52 Yeah. Yeah. I'll be okay on my own. Mr. Buffel, you're really fast. Yeah, you're really fast. Maybe I'll be jumping around. Yeah, you're really fast. You don't need it. Actually, maybe, Kenla, do you want to take Licorice?

Starting point is 00:18:02 As a squire, I do not take precedence when it comes to the bouts I know but I mean getting all four of us out of there is the precedence. Okay. I think you're faster than me Okay Be good and I better see you at the other side of this see licorice slides under Kenna she pops up and Gets in the saddle there. I put foster under my arm and I say it's just me and you now buddy We're back to the start rubs up against you How do you suckle? Why do you keep looking at galley? You're good. You can come with me

Starting point is 00:18:43 She's got the dog I summon an unseen serpent to put some serpent treats in Calder's pocket so that honeysuckle follows him. Oh wow. I know. Yeah. Honeysuckle starts paying way too much attention to Calder now. Yes. It starts biting at you. Hey, hey, hey, hey. I know. I know.

Starting point is 00:19:01 Our little secret honeysuckle. Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, Let's all look at these tunnels and try to listen to our guts and figure out which way we're supposed to go. Sweet. Everybody give me perception checks. Okay. I close my eyes and I listen to the secret music that is all around us at all times. I do that too. 14.

Starting point is 00:19:37 13. 22. You see, Kenna feels strangely drawn to the one all the way on the right. You see, she walks over and stands in the hall there. Center right hallway. Calder, you hear giant footsteps, like far off, like running towards something. This one sounds like me. Calder takes a step into the fog.

Starting point is 00:20:10 Center left, Saul, you feel your spore senses tingling. Almost like you felt when you were tracking swag. There's something down this tunnel. It's it's resonating. I'll go here. Okay, Saul goes to the center left tunnel and from the far left tunnel, Callie, you at first don't feel drawn to anything. But then the far left one, you just get a hint, the smell of tea leaves and spearmint. Mummy.

Starting point is 00:20:53 Did you say something? Nothing. Can we also say that during the short rest, as part of my meditation to get Ki back, I knitted a little serpent into my scarf so that I can also have a dragon. Yeah, so the scarf of displacement now has a serpent on it. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:21:07 Amazing. What was left of your knitting material. So you guys all walk down your individual hallways and we will start from the left. We will start from Callie. Yeah. You enter this fog. You see illuminated blue ice to the sides of you, but the path ahead of you is foggy. You quickly lose sight of the room behind you and no longer can hear your friends. At first you can hear them all walking in or even talking to their mounts. You no longer hear anything. It gets eerily

Starting point is 00:21:47 quiet. There is a strange, wintery silence that almost feels like static, just like this the quiet buzz of silence. And eventually you get to a door, another wall of frost, but this one has an etching in it. It is a picture of you riding a serpent. Maybe I was supposed to bring the serpent. Or maybe this is the prophecy. I look to Foster and say, I think it's time for a promotion and I'm going to cast enlarge on Foster so that I can rise him in. You turn Foster from this tiny duck into this enormous duck monster.

Starting point is 00:22:41 The duck streer. Waaaaaah! Foster expands and now is the size of like a very large dog. And you get on Foster, Foster's feet, he is like half a foot from the ground, just inches from the ground and just begins waddling towards the door. Sorry Foster. It's a duck truck. I think, you know, there's a prophecy that I'm trying to live up to right now, and I gave licorice to Kennan. Quack.

Starting point is 00:23:11 But you'll do just fine. Quack. In fact, I think my mother might know you. Quack. So I guess we'll waddle up to the door. You waddle up to the door and the door cracks open. And as you pass through it, you find yourself in a small icy chamber.

Starting point is 00:23:33 It is dark, very low light, but sitting cross-legged in the middle of the room, you see a cloaked figure. the room, you see a cloaked figure. I think that I am terrified. I haven't seen my mother since the sort of like memory that Oberyn showed me. And I'm not sure if I'm emotionally prepared to inhabit the same space as her.

Starting point is 00:24:03 So I don't go close. I just am gonna shout, show your face! You see the cloaked figure stands up and hanging out from under the hood you do see some dark blue hair, light blue skin, that has some like crystalline freckles that reflect some dim candlelight. But as she takes the cloak off, you see that the face looks hazy as if you're looking at someone in a dream. It's familiar, but it's strange.

Starting point is 00:24:47 But it's not my mother. It's like her, but maybe refracted. You hear a, once again, familiar but strange voice say back to you, What's the matter, Kaliope? You don't recognize your own mother? Not like this. I feel like you've been tempered with. She nods and puts the hood back up and gestures on the floor across from her. Sit, Calliope.

Starting point is 00:25:22 I go, I sit, I try to get a better view. Yeah, you look like the second I see her, I'm just gonna like maybe run into her arms. You look at her face. And again, it's this strange, uncanny thing where you're like, you get this feeling that it's this strange uncanny thing where you're like You get this feeling that it's your mom but it feels like a stranger and it is this just dreamlike thing where something is just not quite right and You hear your mother go I no longer exist I Am a memory. Just the bit of me that you remember and the bit of me that is involved in all of this.

Starting point is 00:26:16 She looks around at the chamber that you're in. This is all that's left of what I remember of you? God, how much have I lost? You have not seen me in a long time. I know. All things fade in time. I don't want that to be the case. Fate was never kind to us, dear.

Starting point is 00:26:42 Like you were saying, this is just a fragment of me. There's still hope. I've seen visions of you reuniting us, where we could start again. Have you seen visions where you and me and Saira are together? Or was that never even a possibility? We are unfortunately destined for greater things than happiness. I am a diviner. I can predict things, but the future is always changing. Most people control their fate to an extent. But you and your friends are special. There are many names for you.

Starting point is 00:27:35 Destiny breakers, fate wanderers, but I prefer the term, Peregrine. You shape destiny. Great and terrible events will unfold in your lifetime and you will be a part of it. The world will change drastically based on whether you succeed or fail. Since you were a little girl, I have seen greatly different visions of you. Cyrus have always been the same. So you knew all this, even when I was a kid? When I caught you looking at me and studying me it wasn't in disappointment? I was put into a position where I had to calculate how to get you the best future. Neither of us asked for this. I received this curse from Queen Joveir. Queen Joveir. When I was younger, she sent her knights out looking for people from Ariox's ancestry and I was brought into her court and my dormant powers were awakened by her

Starting point is 00:29:00 mages. That... that sounds kind of cruel. It was quite cruel. And even after all that, she still had you executed publicly. She nods. Part of me did the things I did to save the Feywild for a better future. And part of me loved looting and plundering her kingdom, and I would kill her a thousand times if I could. I'll kill her for you.

Starting point is 00:29:40 She smiles. I... I'm at such a loss because I... I just feel like until about an hour ago, I spent my life thinking that you... You looked at me and all you saw was limitation, but... now I'm hearing from you that... you saw... unlimited potential, really. Or at least just potential.

Starting point is 00:30:06 Possibility. Yes, with my curse I don't know that I was capable of love in the traditional sense, but you were quite precious to me. Were there any futures that you saw that the world went to absolute shit, but we got more time together? Yes. Were you sad that we didn't get to live those? Yes. I am too.

Starting point is 00:30:54 I think I'll just sit cross-legged across from her and just say, Okay, I don't know what you mean in this place, but I'm yours. Dispatch me as you will. I will do no such thing, Calliope. It is time for you to stop being the pawn and start being the player. You see, a table rises up out of the ground with beautiful sculpted ice figurines. It is a narrow, long, checkered board. There are four icy eladrin figures in squares in front of you. They have little clouds at their feet. Your mother has four icy giants in front of her wielding axes. In a square in front of your mom's figures, there's a dragon piece and there's a similar one

Starting point is 00:31:42 on your side of the table. Havoc does not allow anyone and its domain without purpose. I am here to challenge you. We are going to play a game, Kaliope. OK. And with that, we're going to cut over to Saul. Saul. Yes. You head down a similar hallway alone. Fog behind you and in front of you, but these glowing blue walls to the side.

Starting point is 00:32:14 And eventually you come to a wall of ice with an image of you riding a serpent. Oh, what does the serpent look like? You get up close to it and you look at it from one angle and it looks like you're riding honeysuckle. You look at it from the other angle. Looks like you're riding licorice and the other one. You don't recognize this dragon but you can imagine this would be marigold, the third one. Ah, so it's kind of like a lenticular like if you look in different places it shifts. Yep. Wow. I turn to my scarf and say maybe it's kind of like a lenticular, like if you look in different places, it shifts. Yep. Wow.

Starting point is 00:32:46 I turn to my scarf and say, maybe it's you, the fourth dragon, Twizzler. The scarf doesn't move. I'll always be with you Saul. See the spirit writes, what was that? Nothing. Shove it in my shirt. Yeah. So this is a hall of challenges.

Starting point is 00:33:11 Show me what you got. The wall cracks and pushes in to form a 90 degree angle, essentially creating a triangular room. Your back is up against the base as a wall appears behind you. On the right and left walls, the frost begins to gather and create moving images. They are crude at first, but eventually you recognize the images as depicting swag. More and more frost gathers until the images look rich and lifelike.

Starting point is 00:33:46 At first, the image on the left wall stays still, but the right wall begins playing a vision. You see a visual recounting of the events at East Watch, the attack on the tower. And you hear echoing through the hall Gregor retelling this to you, memories of you hearing this story, Gawain saying it, what people had said, that there was an attack on the tower. You see an image of Gawain and some of his rangers checking in a group of unfamiliar rangers coming back from a mission. There's no sound, but you can see that there's some confusion.

Starting point is 00:34:23 The unfamiliar rangers begin spreading out like they're going to take a battle formation when suddenly one of them shifts into swag and yells to warn Gawain that they're being ambushed. The rangers get the jump on the replicants. There is a bloody back and forth where swag attempts to resist the urge to join the other replicants. Eventually, the rangers overcome the and Swag is subdued. Gawain picks him up and defends him from the other Rangers who seem to be gesturing that

Starting point is 00:34:54 Swag should be killed. Instead, Gawain takes Swag to Ingrid the Alchemist where he's laid on the table in her basement where you saw him last. Picture freezes. That's on the right wall. On the left wall, another vision begins. This is a retelling of the Replicants' raid on the town of Coldbreak. Rangers and guards are out in the streets battling these morphing monsters. In a nearby building, there is a safe house with a bunch of non-combatants, a lot of old

Starting point is 00:35:30 folks and children watching nervously through the windows as their defenders are cut down by these strange beings. Suddenly two replicants burst through the door. The crowd screams and tries to flee, but they're cornered. One of the replicants embiggens its fists and prepares to attack, but the other intercepts and destroys it before it can hurt any of the townsfolk. The confused onlookers watch as the remaining replicant reveals himself to be Swag. Between bouts of grabbing his head and trying to resist, the frog pleads with the confused onlookers to follow him out of the village.

Starting point is 00:36:08 From there you see visions of Swag leading the giants through the tundra. They take breaks to warm themselves by a fire, but Swag separates himself as he continues to resist the urge to join the network. Eventually he gets them to the outpost of the frozen fist, the home base of the polar orcs that you met. Right. He speaks to commander full Dar you recognize full Dar and hands him something then ventures off on his own into the tundra as the orcs care for the giants and bring them in for shelter swag staggers out into the snow, far away from the outpost and stops at a frozen lake. He drops to his knees and takes on a serene look and the picture freezes. And during that one,

Starting point is 00:36:54 you hear Gregor telling the story of that one, that they got a raven from the frozen fist saying that Swag had been spotted out there, that a Bullywuck had been spotted out there. that swag had been spotted out there, that a Bullywuck had been spotted out there. And a moment later, you see both images accumulate frost until they form 3D versions, like ice sculptures of swag, a left swag and a right swag coming out of the walls. They step out into the room and rush up to give you a hug. Saul! You're here! I did the best I could!

Starting point is 00:37:30 Swags? How is this possible? The entire time? I didn't know. There's two of you? How can this be? You see, Left Swag looks at Right Swag and goes, No, he's an imposter! Right Swag looks at Left Swag and goes, No, he's an imposter. Right Swag looks at Left Swag, No, he's the imposter. Just when I thought I'd figure this out. Is it possible that you're lost within the network itself and you're able to pop up at multiple points

Starting point is 00:37:58 to inhabit multiple bodies? You see, both of them look at each other and then look at you and go, I mean, yeah, I guess that's possible. And you do see that they are the gray skinned, wired covered version of swag. So it does look like in either version they were taken over by Alexandrite and either are Alexandrite and are pretending not to be or are resisting it to the best of their abilities. Yeah, I mean, both of them say kind of at the same time,

Starting point is 00:38:36 yeah, I mean, I'm resisting it at the best I can. I feel the call of the network, but. But this isn't really you. That's not really me they both point to each other okay suddenly you see black smoke begins to fill the hallway and the twin Saul's eyes turn red possessed they leap into action to attack you but before they get anything in you you cannot be surprised. But nobody's rolling initiative yet. We're going to go over to Calder. Calder, you wander the long hallway

Starting point is 00:39:15 and come to a similar one to the ones your compatriots found. You've got honeysuckle under you. And honeysuckle tries to burrow into the ice walls next to you What? And can't get through And he's getting frustrated and slamming into it Yeah, yeah, I think the only way out is through, sweetheart Yeah, you see Honeysuckle is frustrated but you eventually wrangle him and you get to a door that has an image of you riding a serpent Okay. Wow. I hope Kelly didn't feel weird not having a serpent under her. Yeah

Starting point is 00:39:54 I'm sure she figured something out After a moment you see the image of you riding a serpent Dissolves and you see some writing on the wall in front of you. I Read it. What is your brother's greatest weakness? He cares too much. He doesn't think he's ever wrong. writes back. True. True. Hmm. The wall cracks and forms a doorway into a huge cavern.

Starting point is 00:40:28 There is a long icy bridge with dark abyss to either side. About 15 feet from the chasms, you can see images of your friends in their various challenges through the icy walls. They look blurry, but you can tell that it's them. Saul's in particular is a whirlwind of weirdness. You just see blurs bouncing around. You got this, Saul. One of these flams into the wall. Oh, shit. At the other end of the bridge, you see a giant figure attempting to push open a door. Before anything else, you recognize the giant greatsword on his back. Howl, your mother's sword.

Starting point is 00:41:12 Need a little help? Gawain turns around. What are you doing here, Calder? Looks like you're struggling with that door. Just want to make sure you know you can always ask for help." He looks away from you. I already have help. There's nothing you can do for me. Well, you're my brother. The least you can do is let me try.

Starting point is 00:41:39 Gawain starts to walk towards you. Alright, can you make a hard choice here? We can make a choice together. that's what we can do. You don't have to do it yourself. I made a deal with Alexandrite Calder. Can you take it back, or is it? No it's pretty... No take back, Sees.

Starting point is 00:42:02 Pretty sealed, yeah. No redo. That frog at Ingrid's... I spared it because it seemed like it was trying to help us at the tower. Yeah. But when we were alone, it revealed its true form. An avatar of Alexandrite. She told me that she'd already snuck replicants into the village, and that she'd take out everyone one by one until I gave her the ice knife.

Starting point is 00:42:27 She can't get in here. Havoc won't let her. And to prove it, she killed my best friend and told me if I told anyone, mom and dad would be next. She replaced our neighbors. Have you talked to any of our neighbors? Because they're watching the house. They absorbed Ingrid. And then you told me she's bringing in more from the lake.

Starting point is 00:42:48 She knows everything, Calder. She's everywhere. Yeah. Yeah, we might be fucked. But we can be fucked together. We can go down fighting. Or you can sacrifice yourself like some martyr. But that's not going to help us. If it was just sacrificing myself, I would gladly do it, Calder.

Starting point is 00:43:13 But what would you do in my situation? Knife to mom's throat, what would you do? He pushes you. I might have done the same thing. I might have done the same thing. But you have to understand that somebody coming in this thing with fresh eyes, somebody who's seen her up close, you don't know the duplicity that she's capable of. You're acting on intel that you got from Alexandrite.

Starting point is 00:43:36 The intel that I got from you was that Gregor was compromised. And that just meant I stayed around until she killed Ingrid. So she wants us not to trust each other. She wants us not to work together. She wants us fractured and weak like this. We are fractured and weak, Calder. She's here already. So circle up with us. Calder, go ahead and give me a persuasion check. But you see that as you're pleading with your brother,

Starting point is 00:44:09 black smoke begins to arise from the chasm beneath the bridge, and you see flares of red in your brother's eyes as he's yelling at you. Like particularly when he got aggressive, when he was like knife to mom's throat, what would you do? You see like a flash of red in his eyes and you feel like your temperature rising. Not like you're being charmed,

Starting point is 00:44:33 but like the heat's being turned up and like you're part of you's like, I'm gonna kick this guy's ass. Like it is getting tense in a way that is slightly unnatural. Give me a persuasion check. You do have a bardic. If you get close and you wanna try to pump it. I, I'm gonna pump it.

Starting point is 00:44:55 I got really high, but I'm gonna keep it going. Pump it. It's a 24. You are my brother, aren't you? You see the blood lust kind of leaves Gawain's eyes and he looks down and he goes, yeah, yeah I am. Okay. And he turns and looks at the door. The door said only one of us can go through. And I don't know of any other way to keep mom and dad safe except to do what I'm doing. And you want to do what you're doing. So how about this? No steel. We settle

Starting point is 00:45:36 this like brothers." Points to the abyss on the side of the bridge. First one to knock the other one off the edge wins. Just like the old log over the icy river. Gawain nods, gives a little smirk, and goes, you always wanted to be treated like an equal with me and Gregor. Let's see if you're ready for it. You're going down, shithead. Uh, Gawain goes in to wrestle with you.

Starting point is 00:46:07 Everybody go ahead and roll initiative. Alright. I'll be having a 28 for supper, Papa. Fuck yeah. That's a 10 for Calliope. It's a 21 for Calder. I have a 10. Right on.

Starting point is 00:46:21 Murphy has a 10. Interesting. Are you proud of me? I got you. I heard you proud of me. I got you very proud of me very proud of you at the top of the order is Saul Buffau so Black smoke up all around you. This does not seem like Alexandrite this seems like some kind of strange bloodlust in the air Probably due to this like trickster spirit that has

Starting point is 00:46:45 embodied these swags both swags go into attack but you are first to act okay they're both attacking you trying to hurt you but there is left swag and right swag okay left swag is the cold break swag and right swag is the ice knife swag that you saw in Ingrid's Eastwatch swag. House and stuff, Eastwatch swag, yeah. Cold break and Eastwatch. Yep.

Starting point is 00:47:11 All right, things are gonna get mixed up real quick here. I am trying to think if I have anything on my possession that I could use to distinguish them. I pull out the last remaining scraps of yarn that weren't burned up. Okay. Calder shivers over in his cave and he doesn't know why. You can see it through the wall.

Starting point is 00:47:32 What is he doing? I'm just going to hold them in my hand and keep eyes on them. And actually, yeah, for my first action, I think I am, if you'll let me split up my movement like this, I want to take an attack on each of them Okay, and try and plant the thread on them in a place. They won't notice okay that I can keep tabs on which one's which oh Rad very smart. Yeah, okay Make an attack on we'll start with right swag. Okay, right swag is ice knife swag

Starting point is 00:48:00 Okay, East watch. He's got that ice knife swagger. Yeah Okay, that's going to be a 17 to hit? 17 does not hit. You see right swag grabs your hand and just palms it and moves it to the side. You're definitely a swag alright. Or at least you're wearing his skin.

Starting point is 00:48:18 I'm going to use a key point to boost that by 2 does a 19 hit. 19 does hit. they do not have your gauntlets or scarf of displacement so your fist inflates and you manage to hit right swag go ahead and do your damage you do manage to place a piece of yarn on on him okay we'll call this red for right swag okay and then lavender for left sweat great Great, okay.

Starting point is 00:48:47 13 damage to this swag. Great, crack him across the face. Looks like it definitely affects him. Okay, and then I kind of kick off of him and I'm gonna sprint towards lavender swag. Ah! It's not lavender yet, bro. Yeah, I'm just left swag to you. I know that Havoc is just using you to play tricks on me,

Starting point is 00:49:04 but I'm gonna use you to sort this all out and finally figure out which one of you is the real swag and figure out which one of you is Alexandride and really just get in touch with my feelings. That's a Dirty 20 to hit. Dirty 20 does hit. I'm gonna do my extra D8 to this so that's going to be 17 damage total to this swag. Okay yeah you see this swag slams back into the wall and cracks the cold break vision the like sort of frozen image of their backstory there. And then I kind of jump back now that I've marked both of them and I take a moment to clear my head and just think through everything I know and say Even if the swag that was at Eastwatch was swagged for a moment

Starting point is 00:49:50 He gave up and the other swag went all the way to the pond. He's waiting for me there And after I say that I am going to sprint towards red swag and do a flurry of blows right on okay Okay, red swag is right swag is ice knife swag is east watch swag. He's got that east watch swagger, he's red swag. Okay, that's going to be 22 to hit. Hits. Second one is 21 to hit. Hits.

Starting point is 00:50:16 Both hit, that's 27 damage. All right. Yeah, you see right swag is starting to look injured. You just pummel him into the wall, is blocking you at first, but then starts to get tired and letting his guard up and at the end of your turn Saul you take 17 damage just like psychic damage you just feel like a shock go up through you. Does it feel like psychic damage does it feel like I'm just taking damage from thinking really hard or? Go ahead and give me a perception or an insight check.

Starting point is 00:50:48 Just a flat 10. You're not sure part of the mind fuckery of all of this. You see ha ha ha written in the wall. Swags, let's just all sit down and focus up, okay? The swags turn and both attack you, taken over by whatever this Bloodlust is. So first one, Right Swag is going to try to turn around and kick you into the wall, do like a push kick.

Starting point is 00:51:14 Only gets a 16 though, misses, fully misses. Second attack is gonna hit. It's gonna try to do a leg sweep, so that is 24 to hit, even with disadvantage. Give me a DC 16 dexterity saving throw or you'll be knocked prone. Oh God. Oh hell yeah.

Starting point is 00:51:34 Dexterity, 27. Okay, you get kicked in the leg for 14 damage, you feel your leg buckle, but you do not go down. He takes a third strike, just a regular attack. That one hits for 14 damage. Then left swag uses the wall for momentum, does like a frog jump off of it and launches at you and is going to attempt the same thing. Try a leg sweep. That one hits. That is 15 damage. And then go ahead and give me a Dexterity saving throw, Saul, as you are overwhelmed by both swags

Starting point is 00:52:08 That's another 27 27 passes you feel your leg buckle, but you stay up Tries just some regular fist attacks next one misses you're able to get your hand up to block Next one goes next attack is a 21 to hit is that is going to hit. OK, that is just eight damage. OK, so punches you, but you're able to have it just like kind of graze your ear. It hurts, but it's not like a carousel blow. As soon as the last hit strikes me, I grab on to that swag's arm. OK. And then with my other hand, I've powered up and do a hellish rebuke.

Starting point is 00:52:43 OK, right on. So you uppercut that swag do a hellish rebuke. Okay, right on. So you uppercut that swag with a hellish rebuke. Has to roll a dexterity saving throw? Yeah. Okay. 16. Nat one. Okay.

Starting point is 00:52:55 You fully grab this swag and restrain him for a moment and punch him right in the gut with a fiery punch. That is going to be seven fire damage. Okay. Hey there, NAD polls. After years of fine print contracts and getting ripped off by overpriced wireless providers, if we have learned anything, it's that there is always a catch

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Starting point is 00:55:05 They've got stripes, florals, they've even got a pointelle sock with a frilly cuff for those frill seekers out there. I personally, I love a little personality in a sock. I always have animals on my socks when we do live shows, so get comfy this spring and give back with Bombas. Head over to bombas.com slash papa and use code papa for 20% off your first purchase. That's B-O-M-B-A-S dot com slash P-A-W-P-A-W and use code papa at checkout. Goodbye, sweeties. From there, we are going to cut over to Calder. So Calder, you are in a wrestling match with Gowan. You guys lock up. Here's how this is going to work. The bridge is about 20 feet wide, so 10

Starting point is 00:55:54 feet on either side. Shove attacks are 5 feet, so you got to win a couple shove attacks in a row. You basically got to win like three in a row and stop the person from being able to like gain any ground and push you back. Okay. When they go to fall over the edge, there's going to be a dexterity saving throw to hang on and to stay in the fight.

Starting point is 00:56:14 And that will be contested against the athletics check. Got it? Okay. So right now you guys are even. Gotcha. And so you see Gowan starts going at you, but because you're able to get low and like get at his legs, you start to like pick him up a little bit and he has to dig his back foot in

Starting point is 00:56:31 and starts pushing at you and you feel your brother's full strength for the first time ever and he is fucking strong. Oh wow, all right, not protecting you. You're not protecting me anymore. You don't get up early enough. I rise and grind. You don't get up early enough to beat me. I forgot you were the rise and grind.

Starting point is 00:56:50 You do not rise and grind. I'll hit snooze once, but then I do grind. You rise and whine. You rise and whine. No, I don't. Yes, you do. I rise a little bit late and I do grind. You act first though, so you do get the jump on him.

Starting point is 00:57:03 So you get the first kind of burst of strength. You also, if you have other shenanigans that you do get, you get the jump on him, so you get the first like kind of burst of strength. You also, if you have other shenanigans that you do, you don't necessarily have to play by his rules. Okay. But it is your turn. All right, first of all, would you allow me to, in the beginning of this shoving match, knock my helmet loose and have it land on the bridge?

Starting point is 00:57:21 Wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, that idea. Yes, of course. Easy, okay. Go ahead and give me a deception check with advantage, and this is just gonna be against his passive insight. Okay. That's an 18. Okay, Helmet gets knocked off in the melee,

Starting point is 00:57:44 rolls and stays safe. You see Honeysuckle goes over and kind of wraps around it and just watches, kind of understands that this is a one-on-one combat, but guards your helmet. Gowan does not seem to notice. He's just grunting and talking shit as he fights you. All right, sweet. I'll take three shove attacks on it.

Starting point is 00:58:01 Okay, so contested athletics checks. Ooh. Wow. Ooh. Wow. Okay. My first one is a 17. His first one is a 21. So you go to move him and it just does not happen. He just ain't going.

Starting point is 00:58:18 Okay, hold on. I didn't tie my shoe. You've definitely gotten stronger. I think that means you're gonna lose by less. Don't go easy on me. Uh, that's a 22 for my second. Okay. 17 for his second. He starts to kind of talk shit and he goes to gain ground on you, but you're able to push him five feet closer to the edge.

Starting point is 00:58:38 Am I getting stronger or did you lose a step? Ha ha ha. Alright, one more shove. 24. 22. Okay. You push him up five feet. You see his back foot is right up against the edge here. Come on brother. Don't let me win. He goes from a kind of playful demeanor to looking very serious and pushing back. I'm going to action search and see if I can get them. Yes, I was hoping you would. I was going to mouth it to you if you did it.

Starting point is 00:59:09 That is a 25. That is a 27. You see, he grits his teeth down and pushes back. I dig my feet into the bridge and I give one more shove. Twenty one. Twenty nine. He stays on. He's really you see see he has dug his feet in so deep into the frost that he now has like a pocket there that he's able to get some leverage and he's just holding strong like almost completely horizontal and you are you are a hulking monster right now veins coming out from

Starting point is 00:59:42 under your muscles you're going toe to toe with your brother right now. You might be stronger, but I've got heart. And I think I'm just gonna let go, try to use all of his momentum and turn and, like, toss him over my shoulder. Okay, sweet. Okay, so you're pushing him in the same direction. So you want to kind of, like, fall to one side and kind of, like, throw him over your shoulder. So you guys are, like, parallel with the side. I want to trip him if possible. Right on. 23. That is only a 16 from him

Starting point is 01:00:13 so he is going to fall if he doesn't pass his deck state. So you do manage to you just shift your body weight you fall basically let him fall on top of you and begin to roll towards the side of the edge and go to throw him off How far down is this it's just abyss you don't know and And he hangs on he gets a nat 20 on his dexterity saving throw, okay So he stays on and he goes I assume just this fucked up labyrinth that whoever falls off will live It'll just be down a different path. I assume it just spits you out, okay? I assume it'll just spit you out. It turns into a slide. I don't know maybe it's like the last hole at the mini-golf It's got yes the balls go back to the beginning. Yeah, yeah, okay, so he manages to save

Starting point is 01:01:01 So he's hanging on to the edge here, but you still have him at zero feet So you still just need to beat him on this one like deck save throw? Okay, okay, so you guys are still wrestling he is going to go now So he does the same thing except he doesn't have action surge So all he can hope to do is toss you basically back to the middle or start winning a little bit So he does a shove attack on you. OK. Oh, my God. That's a twenty nine on that one.

Starting point is 01:01:29 I literally can't beat it. Yeah, I rolled really high and I didn't. You guys are both on the ground because you tried to like trip him and like roll him over to the side. So he gets his foot underneath you and kicks you up and you crash into the ground five feet further away. He gets up and goes to bull rush you and get under you and freaking WWE spear you.

Starting point is 01:01:49 Mom! Oh, sorry, that was a reflex. That was a reflex. I didn't say that. You telling on me? No, I didn't. It just came out. This is the most human and like the old Gowan you remember.

Starting point is 01:02:02 Nice. That you've seen since coming back. This is truly like a almost childish competition right now. the old Gowan you remember. Nice. That you've seen since coming back. This is truly like a almost childish competition right now, but he does get a 28. Oh my God. On his second one. If I crit, I can beat him.

Starting point is 01:02:14 Nope, that's a 23. Okay. He pushes you into the middle. You guys are now back on even ground. So you're in the middle. So he's going to try to pull you even closer. After he spears you, he picks you up and starts just running you towards the edge and that one is only a 19. Okay

Starting point is 01:02:32 Shit I got an 18. Okay He pushes you five feet away from the edge on the other side and is pushing you that way Shit, I probably should have pulled you back the other way Would have been smart, but that's not really your thing. Why did I, why did I not turn around? Shut up. Shut up. Stick my tongue out Adam. After Calder and Gowan, we are going to cut over to Callie and her mother

Starting point is 01:02:57 sitting across this board. You see, like I'd said before, fouradrin figures in squares in front of you. There are four giants in front of her, and then there are two dragon pieces. So just to be clear, my challenge is to play chess with an oracle. Your mom shrugs and jesters to the chamber. I see you have high standards for me, Havik! You see, ha ha ha. That's right, I made you have high standards for me, Havik. You see, ha ha ha. That's right, I made you laugh.

Starting point is 01:03:29 And your mom nods and goes, If you pay close attention, you'll learn an important lesson. What? I'm sorry, it's just- You don't like learning lessons? I just would love to do something with you other than learn lessons You see she just looks forward perhaps in another life Yeah, here are the rules

Starting point is 01:03:54 Each piece has eight hit points on your turn your pieces can move twice or move and attack You can attack another piece in an adjacent block. See she gestures to her own pieces. The giants do 1d8 of damage. She gestures to your pieces. The eladrin do 1d6, but they have a special ability. They can jump over other pieces. Vice them. Exactly. If another piece is directly in front of you, you can jump over it and place your piece down the column to the next available space. The dragons meanwhile are agents of chaos, they will attack on their own whatever pieces they are closest to. They do 1d10 of damage and have the most health with 12 HP.

Starting point is 01:04:39 Attacks automatically hit, it's just a matter of if you can do enough damage to kill a piece. You win when your opponent has lost all of their pieces. The dragons do not have to be killed. Are you ready Kaliope? Yeah I'm ready. As my daughter I'll let you choose whether you'd like to go first or second. I'd like to go second. You'd like to get a read on the battlefield first? Yeah. Interesting choice. She kind of clicks her tongue and then looks down at the board. And to describe this to people at home, basically, it's a very narrow board. It's just two spaces wide, so two columns, then 12 rows.

Starting point is 01:05:21 So it's much longer than it is wide. Callie's got her four eladrin, two in each column on her side of the board. Her mom's got four giants on the other side. There's two squares between the armies, so typically you'd need to move twice to get to the other army, but there's a dragon in each empty row. At the start of the game, the dragons actually go first. So you see these two independent pieces move as if by an invisible hand. One slides next to your front line, the other hers, and they begin breathing fire down on

Starting point is 01:05:54 your pieces. We'll start with a D10 attack on hers. That is a 10. Completely destroys one of Kali's mom. You see she grimaces and grits her teeth and looks forward. Dragon automatically eliminates one of them. Next dragon goes after one of Kali's pieces. That is another 10, no joke, destroys one of Kali's pieces.

Starting point is 01:06:20 Kali, how much HP do you have? How much HP do I have? Yeah. Personally me. Personally you. 98 much HP do I have? Yeah. Personally me. Personally you. 98. You shouldn't have told them. Uh huh.

Starting point is 01:06:28 Uh huh. Callie, as this dragon piece magically slides forward on the narrow board and breathes fire onto your eladrin, you see the eladrin melts and then breaks away and you feel a shock of pain go through your body and you take 24 damage, one quarter of your life as one of your four pieces dies. Does my mom look like she took damage?

Starting point is 01:06:59 She would never show it if she did. Yeah, you see she stays stoic. A poker face and a game of chess. She pulls her cloak further over her face. Then she is going to go. You see, she is going to move forward and engage with the dragon that is going after her dudes. Oh, she's gonna try to attack the dragon?

Starting point is 01:07:20 So she goes after the dragon. Dragon has 12 hit points and she does a d6 with each one. So she's got one attacking diagonally, one from the side and one from the other side. Six damage, one damage, that's seven. 12 damage, takes out a dragon. I'm gonna be like the guy in an anime who's just on the sidelines explaining what's happening.

Starting point is 01:07:39 Yeah. So she used three pieces to flank the dragon. Excellent move. You see the dragons are made of like stone, like tougher stuff than the ice, but the icy miniatures of giants come over and slam in with frosty axes and break it apart. And you see that dragon goes away.

Starting point is 01:07:59 And Kali, that is your turn. Okay, I'm looking at the board. It's giants, dragons, a ladren. I'm thinking that I at the board. It's Giants, Dragons, Eladrin. I'm thinking that I need the Giants and the Dragons to fight each other. So I'm just going to retreat and hope that the Dragon gets in her way as she comes to me. Great. Okay. So you use your full movement to move two squares back,

Starting point is 01:08:24 putting the Dragon that was attacking you closer to her army now. So now at the start of the next round, the dragon will presumably go after her army. You hear your mother clicks her tongue as she looks at the board. Do you think I'd be too hot headed to know when it's time to retreat? You're learning patience, Calliope. Yes, yes, learning from mother. From there, we are going to cut back to Saul and the Swags.

Starting point is 01:08:53 Saul, at the start of your turn, you take seven damage. Jesus Christ. You feel a fiery punch to the gut. A fiery punch? Who did that? Which one of you? Havoc, was it you? You see the the swags point to each other and when it's actually when it's not their turn you see the the black smoke goes away. Both swags go clear-eyed and they go, I don't know what happened. I turned a face all around. I'm sick and tired of being used.

Starting point is 01:09:28 First it was Launchpad, then it was Alexandrite, now Havoc. I don't care which of you is real and which of you is fake. I'm getting through this challenge. I'm destroying everything in my path so I can save the remnant of the real swag. He's out there and that's all I care about. But I'm the real swag! Shut up! Which one is looking more hurt? The right swag. The right swag, okay.

Starting point is 01:09:51 I'm looking extremely hurt. So I'm going to maneuver towards the right swag and take two attacks on him. Great. 21 for the first hit. 21 hits. And a 14 for the second hit. I'm going to use my bardic. Oh shit.

Starting point is 01:10:10 Dirty 20 hits. Both hit. I start laying into him and I say, I wish we didn't have to fight. I wish we could just play a three person game of a Ladran Dragon Giant Chest. We don't have to fight. I love a Ladran Dragon Giant Chest. I wish there was a better name for it.

Starting point is 01:10:26 We all love it. Think about the future we could have had. A Ladran Dragons is a band in the book. A Ladran Dragons. Okay, I'm gonna do all my damage real quick here. Right on. Six plus 14. 20.

Starting point is 01:10:44 That's 20 damage. Right swag stays up. Oh! Alright, I'm gonna have to pretty hurt. I'm gonna have to flurry of blows him. Okay. 15 misses. Yep. I'm gonna enlarge my fist. 19. 19 hits. Yes! Oh yeah. It's just big enough. It was gonna, you were gonna whiff but you hit him in. Ah! And that's gonna be a 29 to hit? Hits. All right, so that's two more D8s of damage. That's another 20 damage. Saul, finish this swag. Woo!

Starting point is 01:11:14 Ah! All right. I get in close, and I just kind of like punch him right in the pressure points. And as I'm standing over him, I lift my leg, doing like splits into the air, and say say if it was really you at Eastwatch you could have done more. I know that Alexandrite is just using you. She's using all of us. I'm not mad at you but I'm mad at everything in this world and I slam down my foot. You do an axe kick across this swag's head.

Starting point is 01:11:40 down my foot. You do an axe kick across this swag's head. His neck bends at an unnatural angle and he dies as his face shifts from a look of pain, from looking like swag to Alexandrite with a smile. And after kind of freezing in that position, finally the body drops to the ground and takes the form of another just zombified mothership employee, just another avatar. This was never the real swag. And you see left swag shakes out of it once the false one is dead and the black mist begins to

Starting point is 01:12:25 dissipate, leaves the room and his eyes go from red to looking normal again and he runs over to you. Saul! Saul, I'm sorry I was I was trying to reach you! No no no I'm sorry I'm sorry it took me so long to figure it out. I just, I had to fight both of you so that I would know. So that when I have to do this again, I'll make the right choice without fail. But I'm sorry.

Starting point is 01:12:54 It's not your fault. She was using your connection to me to try to throw you off her scent. That's what she does. She takes the connections, the threads, and she twists them. Do you remember that dream that we had when we were in the water?

Starting point is 01:13:14 Of course. It was at that lake. You see, Swag walks over and points to his side of the wall where he has stopped at a lake after collapsing after saving the giants from cold break. That was really me. That was really us. Until she hijacked it.

Starting point is 01:13:39 And you see flashbacks of the dream that you had with Swag floating in the water. There was that moment when your vision glitched out before it filled up with wires. The glitch. Everything from then on was was her Saul. But our our first conversation was real. And you see flashes of that conversation kind of going back to that dream. You hear him saying, I got to be a hero at the end, Saul. You've got to let me. And last time you had gotten cut off, but this time it comes back to reality. And Swag puts his hand on your shoulder and goes, You've got to let me go.

Starting point is 01:14:27 Swag, how? You'll always be a part of me. You are me. How can I let you go? Can you promise me that you'll be okay? Swag smiles and nods but kind of avoids your gaze and goes, talk to Commander Fuldar. He's on his way. He's bringing people to the village, to the village of the Iceknife. Okay, just whatever you're doing, stay safe. Hang in there. Focus on yourself. I've talked with Albin.

Starting point is 01:15:06 We'll find a way. The things that Alexandrette is doing, we'll find a way to counteract them. She's poisoning our minds, but we can find a way to fight back. I promise you, just please hold out as long as you can. I'm coming for you. Yeah, he shakes his head.

Starting point is 01:15:27 Talk to Foldar. Okay. And he gives you a hug. And then as he touches you, melts away. And you see around you these thick ice walls that before seemed impenetrable are suddenly very thin. And you can see on one side, Calder is wrestling with Gawain in a bridge of like another room of another lower cavern. Whoa, hey, Calder, look out, he's coming at ya. These boots have no traction, there's no traction.

Starting point is 01:16:09 Yeah, thank God he's not wearing the knit boots. You see, Kenna is going through some kind of challenge. You can't quite see her very well. You see Kali is playing a Ladren giant dragon chest. That's right. It turns out my mom actually believes in me and believes in my future but that just means that she signed me up for intellectually stimulating extracurricular activities. You'll thank me when you're older. Okay so I had to go through

Starting point is 01:16:35 like a metaphysical journey to discover my true purpose in terms of my relationship to my clone father brother and you're going to chess chess camp. I'm going to chess camp. Yeah. Because my mother wants to play chess. Not because I do. You know what I mean? I'd give anything to play chess right now. So Saul, you can see these other people's challenges now. Okay. Is there anything I can do to affect them? You, I bel- do you have any more attacks? I do not. I think I'm out of everything.

Starting point is 01:17:04 It is. It does look thin enough that you could break through into somebody else's chamber. But you would need an attack to be able to do it. I do have a reaction left. I can use my silvery barbs if things get dire. Oh, you can see now. Wow.

Starting point is 01:17:18 Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you can see what's going on. Great. So you look through the ice, and you can see everybody's attacks. And I will also say, Saul, the realization hits you after you talk to the swag that was real. Whenever you attacked left swag, you took that damage. Ah.

Starting point is 01:17:35 Oh, right, because it was the... Yeah, Hellish Rebuke. There it is. So you can continue to watch. You know what, credit where credit's due, Havoc. That was pretty good. Thanks, written in the ice wall. Bohemia. From there, we are going to cut down to Calder and Gowan,

Starting point is 01:17:51 who are wrestling back and forth. Calder, you are now going five feet in the wrong direction. Gowan has won three straight and gotten back from the edge of the bridge to the middle of it, and then has pushed you one away, but that is your turn. Okay. Would you let me kind of feign like I'm pushing him and let him push me closer to the edge?

Starting point is 01:18:17 Like basically lose on purpose. Yes, you could definitely lose on purpose. It's, you know, he's overpowering you right now. So just like you let up a little bit and are pretending to tire. I'm already losing by accident. So yeah, I'll just lose on purpose a little bit. Okay, so I'll say you don't have to use up any of your movement or anything.

Starting point is 01:18:36 If you just let up a little bit, you start to get pushed towards the edge. You feel one of your heels slip off towards the abyss and your other foot catches just short of it and your brother goes, I don't know where you're going, but you wanted me to trust that you could protect yourself. Tell me how it works out. And I'm gonna let him push me over, but hold onto him

Starting point is 01:19:00 and teleport myself to the helm. Wow. Having him use his momentum to carry him off. Okay, okay, okay. I love this. Here's what we're gonna do. If you're going over the edge with him, we are not going to do the Dexterity Saving throw because he doesn't get a chance to like try to grab

Starting point is 01:19:24 onto an edge he's hanging on to you. So you suddenly let up and he goes to throw you off. It is just going to be a straight competing athletics check and you could do it for as many attacks as you have so you can try it a couple times. You're trying to just jump over the edge while hanging on to him which is a hell of a lot easier than trying to like pick him up and push him right so give me some contested athletics checks let's do the first one all right first one is a 28 I got a 26 okay so you feel he realizes what you're doing at the last second what are you nuts you're gonna knock us both off. Oops. Two more tries.

Starting point is 01:20:07 What did he get? What did you get? I got a 22. He got a natural one. That's a 13. You see he has to completely pull himself to one side to avoid being tricked by it the first time. And the next time you go for it, you just throw your weight into him and you guys

Starting point is 01:20:26 both sling over into the abyss you begin falling your brother's hanging on to you and just looks at you and smirks and goes good luck little brother good luck big brother that wasn't cheating by the way it was strategy bye he lets you go uh you teleport yourself up to the crown using an action, a seldom remembered ability that has not been used since the submarine, where it was used as a joke, that you can use an action to get up to the crown. So you teleport yourself back up to the crown, and as you land on this bridge, Honeysuckle greets you. Rum, rum. Hey, sweetheart. Oh, wow. I have a bunch of treats in my pocket. Do you want a tiny rock? Rum, rum, rum, rum, rum, rum.

Starting point is 01:21:10 How did that get in there? And you see the door on the other side of the bridge that Gowan was trying to open suddenly cracks and opens, and you see a fog. You also see all of the glass around you, different like pockets and different caverns begin to illuminate and you had just seen blurs of your friends before, but now you can fully see Callie having this chess game. You can see Saul just eyes poked out,

Starting point is 01:21:38 looking, watching everybody. And you see that Kenna is still finishing up her challenge. But with that, we'll cut back to Callie. So Kali, in this 10th strategy game with your mother, first the dragons go. So the dragon moves forward by you retreating, using your two spaces to go back. You have put distance between you and the dragon piece. So the dragon piece automatically attacks the piece that's closest,

Starting point is 01:22:03 goes after your mother. She grits her teeth. Very clever, Calliope. Thank you. That's what I have to do to get your attention. You always have my attention, Calliope. Nine damage to one of her guys, which completely kills it. Bye!

Starting point is 01:22:20 Alright. Okay, that is your mother's turn. She's got two pieces that are stronger than your pieces, but you've got three pieces. What is she going to do? She does not have much choice, can't really get to you, can't jump people, can only move two spaces, you've retreated back, she will just engage with the dragon. She jumps forward with her remaining two pieces and only does four damage. So that puts the dragon down from 12 HP to eight remaining HP.

Starting point is 01:22:47 Your mother only has two pieces. She just clicks her tongue as she thinks. Kaliope, that is your turn. I mean, I think this is what Aureox did. I think I just stay retreated and let them go after each other. I'm essentially doing what he did. Rad, you just watched the board. That is back to the stone dragon's turn.

Starting point is 01:23:06 The dragon turns and takes an attack on your mother's piece. Jesus Christ, I'm rolling so well for these dragons. Destroys another one of your mother's pieces. Woo! And then that's your mother's turn. You see she is going to get aggro and just uses two movements to move her pieces up to yours. Okay. That is your turn. and just uses two movements to move her pieces up to yours.

Starting point is 01:23:25 Okay. That is your turn. So I can go one, two. Yeah, so you jump, okay, so you use your skip ability to hop over, you get one over on the other side of her piece and then use the other two to close in. Your mother's piece is now surrounded on all sides. Go ahead and make your attacks.

Starting point is 01:23:46 I'm gonna make three attacks, but with my D6s. I have to get eight points with these D6s. Come on! Three. One. Four. Come on, come on, come on. Six, yay!

Starting point is 01:24:00 Oh my god! Yeah! Woo! Kali, the last piece shatters. The dragon backs off and you see pedestals rise from under your eladrin and your mother does a little golf clap and goes. Well.

Starting point is 01:24:21 Yeah, Callie! Woo! Yeah! As, as, I saw screams, as Saul screams at you. I pose for a Jumbotron, assuming this has all been televised. You can see everyone now. So the room suddenly gets brighter, and you can now see through the ice,

Starting point is 01:24:35 that's about as thin as glass. You can see Saul in his chamber, looks like he's just finished his challenge. Calder looks like he's just finished his challenge on the bridge, and Kenna looks like she's finished her challenge. She's like out of this cavern, like banging on this glass and like giving you a thumbs up. The job is Petrified! What did you do, Kenna? There was like a thing with like my dad, but then also like General Bronzebeard, and it was like a parental figure thing, but also

Starting point is 01:25:02 the lesson was like as a squire, what is your job? And it was like tempting me to become a knight, but it's not to become a knight, it's to help people, Miss Petricor. Wow, that's really good. And was your parental figure like actually there or was it like a manifestation of all the good and bad things that I felt about you? Manifestation. I was there too. I was like, oh, my God, actually, you do have high hopes for me, and yet that comes with, like, an exacting standard. You think?

Starting point is 01:25:30 Your mother just goes, Kaliope, settle down. Why? Give me a fucking hug. Just settle down. Just please, give me a fucking hug. Is that what you want to do? Yeah, I want a fucking hug. Hug her. Hug her. A fragment of a hug. Hug her. Hug her. Hug me. A fragment of a hugger. Hug me!

Starting point is 01:25:46 All right, fine. Bring it in. I clutch her desperately. Even if I conjured you, God, you still feel good. Yeah, you um, she brings you in for a hug, and you do feel more warmth enter her body

Starting point is 01:26:02 as you hug her. And you feel her cold hand touch your hair, but it's kind of strangely comforting. And she goes, yes, yes, Cli-P, and what did we learn? We learned to retreat. No, we learned that strategy beats strength every time. So I guess we didn't learn fuck. I learned that too.

Starting point is 01:26:32 Over here. Looks down at Calder. Hi, I'm Calder. Hello. Everyone, this is the idea of my mother. This is the idea of my mother. Hi, idea of Calix's mom. I actually found like the idea of my clone brother father as well.

Starting point is 01:26:49 Do you know him? I don't know if it's connected like that in any way. My brother fell down this giant abyss. Is he cool? Is he OK? I think it was actually my brother too. Really? Wait, it wasn't the idea?

Starting point is 01:27:01 I don't think it. Mine wasn't an idea. I'm still clutching my mom. I'm still hugging her. You're all just like... I'm smelling her hair. Okay. Damn it, tea leaves. It's good to be back together,

Starting point is 01:27:16 but this version of me just needs to give you some advice going forward. About strategy over strength. Okay. Okay. Do you know this? So this game, right? Yeah. Okay. Okay. Duly noted. So this game, right? Yeah.

Starting point is 01:27:27 Alliance of friendship and alliance of convenience, both are crucial. Sometimes a shared enemy is enough. Yeah. And one more piece of advice. If your opponent thinks they have all the pieces to win, let them. Specifically, she really hits the word pieces.

Starting point is 01:27:58 Could you write that down? I've just been smelling your hair. I miss the scent of your shampoo. Calliope. Okay, I wrote it down. I wrote it down. I wrote it down. I'll write it down.

Starting point is 01:28:08 I would always write to you your things that you had to do that day. Yeah, yeah. All right, I'll make you, I'll write your planner again. Obviously. Oh, you see. She takes a little notebook and writes it down again

Starting point is 01:28:19 and underlines the word pieces and hands it to you. Until we meet again, Klaipi, under better circumstances. I'm looking forward to it. She nods and you feel a cold wind as she dissipates out from under you and the cloak falls to the ground. I miss you. I take the cloak up and I put it on. Oh you put the cloak on you see Foster for a sense of her shampoo. Yeah you still smell the spearmint and tea leaves and you see Foster comes over huge Foster and nuzzles next to you. What happened to the duck? Can we keep that board game? It seems fun. Yeah, it's called Aladdin Dragon

Starting point is 01:29:06 Giant. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I fold it up. You fold it. Do you see that it's like missing some pieces? It looks like your mom didn't keep it great. Oh, I pick up all the pieces. Yeah, yeah, you pick up. I'm just kidding. You pick up all the pieces. She said

Starting point is 01:29:22 pieces and underlined it. I was like, shit, was that a clue? Okay. Yeah, You pick up all the pieces. She said pieces and underlined it. So I was like, shit, was that a clue? Okay. Yeah, I pick it all up. Yeah, you see Foster goes over and starts pecking at the ice. Looking down, Calder is sort of at the center of all this. He's in the biggest room.

Starting point is 01:29:37 You guys are in chambers that are kind of overlooking this main room. And you see Honeysuckle is like pointing towards this open door with a fog in it. I headbutt through the glass. Sweet. Saul shatters the glass in an absolutely terrifying display and begins free falling down into the abyss. Let's do this!

Starting point is 01:29:59 I ride over on honeysuckle to try to catch him. Great, yeah. Saul has a climb speed and everything so So Saul shatters through, but then uses his sticky frog feet to stick into the ground and then hops over to the bridge. Foster, I'm going to say, isn't going to be able to fly, but I'll say you can kind of hover and maybe get you there. We can feather fall. Yeah, OK.

Starting point is 01:30:19 So Foster goes up, pecks through the glass. There's a shatter through the thin ice. And you and Foster feather fall. And I think it's for multiple people. So we do it for Kenna and Licorice as well. Licorice can actually fly. So you see Licorice breaks through the ice on the other side and flies into the center bridge.

Starting point is 01:30:38 Foster and Callie flop down and land in the middle of the bridge. And you guys are all united again. Huh, guys that was rough. That was really rough stuff. Yeah, yeah. I hope we get to do the next part together. Yeah, me too.

Starting point is 01:30:52 I'm glad you guys are back. Yeah, and your brother is just spit out somewhere like a mini golf ball. I'm sure mini golf ball rules applied. Right. Yeah. He smiled right before he, you know, fell forever. I'm sure mini golf ball rules applied right yeah He smiled right before he you know Fell forever so I think he's good. So we have to go to like the snack shack and ask for him back You see writing on the wall

Starting point is 01:31:18 He's alive Okay, you see he passed his challenge His challenge was maybe to let you... To let somebody else take the lead for once. Dang. So have we all passed our challenges then? You have. There's an open door. You see an arrow pointed down at the open door.

Starting point is 01:31:40 Okay. So does this mean that we're friends? The spirit writes, no. What the fuck? Oh, a gentle ribbing from a friend. How funny. Again. How charming. No, period.

Starting point is 01:31:55 How utterly cute. Not cute, no. This is just so fun to talk to. It's just like, I feel like we're collecting friends wherever we go. I say and I beam brightly as I walk through the door. Hell yeah. We are exactly the right amount. I follow.

Starting point is 01:32:14 You guys all walk through the door. There's fog again and very quickly you get kind of disoriented. The entrance disappears from behind you, and suddenly in front of you, you appear in another room. This one looks to be some kind of war room. You see maps laid out, tables, you see weapons, but it's all covered in a thick frost, frozen here. And along with these weapons and plans of war, you see five primordial giants. Creatures that you don't recognize, that you haven't seen before,

Starting point is 01:33:05 frozen in ice here. These are the potential allies that you had been warned about. Whoa. Yeah. These are the giants that Aureox froze. All right. Okay. The ones that we could maybe thaw out and share a common enemy.

Starting point is 01:33:24 Yeah, more friends to collect along the way. They're gonna help us crack the crowns. Yeah. What the fuck do we say when we unfreeze these giants? I guess maybe we make them like a really big cup of tea. Okay, but then we also say we're going into the Feywild and we're fucking breaking Queen Jovia's crown Yeah, are you in are you in that seems enticing right collecting crowns you want in?

Starting point is 01:33:56 So we can stop so we can stop them. Yeah, okay. We're collecting crowns Do you want in get in lose our so we can stop right? Yeah, okay great workshop that a little bit before we As you make plans for diplomacy, how to get everyone on the same page, you see familiar black smoke that you've been seeing in your challenges begins to rise, and you feel tension growing in the room, a palpable, hostile environment

Starting point is 01:34:28 as the giants around you begin to defrost and thaw. And that's where we'll end our session. Oh boy. Oh boy. Oh boy. Oh boy. Oh boy, oh boy, that was incredible, Murph. You had so much prepared for us. It was a lot. You made a game.

Starting point is 01:34:49 I did make a game. I hope we're able to describe it well enough. We'll put pictures up on the Patreon maybe. We'll try to share it with you guys. Yeah, I wanna play it. I wanna play it on the tour bus. I think I need some tweaking, but. I wanna play it when death comes to claim me.

Starting point is 01:35:04 Yeah. I'm gonna challenge death death comes to claim me. Yeah. I'm gonna challenge death with this game. Hell yeah. Whoa. Sweet, well we'll talk more about this over on our Patreon, patreon.com slash nadpod, that's N-E-D-D-P-O-D, don't sing yet. Bohemia.

Starting point is 01:35:14 Wee. Remember that? Wee. Do you guys remember that? Bohemia. Bohemia. Does anyone else have anything they'd like to plug? Bohemia.

Starting point is 01:35:23 Oh, yeah, we'd love to plug Bohemia. Yeah, check it out campaign three Actually, can I plug Bohemia great? It's an incredible world incredible place yep check out all of the wonderful environs there check it out You can follow us on Yeah, you can follow us on social media there may or may not use at CHVSME at Caldyscaldol at AXRESEM at J.Curlis's too. I'm actually at Bohemia.

Starting point is 01:35:50 Follow our campaigns on Bohemia. I don't think you are. And you can tweet about the show using hashtag NADPOD. Bohemia! Bohemia! Bohemia! Yay! BOO-BEE-AH! BOO-BEE-AH! BOO-BEE-AH! BOO-BEE-AH! BOO-BEE-AH! BOO-BEE-AH! BOO-BEE-AH!

Starting point is 01:36:08 BOO-BEE-AH! BOO-BEE-AH! Folks, it's the end of our show, which means it's time to shout out our benevolent Council of Elders. Here they are. Brad D. Jeffrey S. Lord of the Fjord.

Starting point is 01:36:21 Hugh C. Later McSkater. Matt M. Cutter W. Jeff C, Daniel G, Danielle the dastardly dame, Beardman Dan, Danny P, Bryant, best friend to Nathan the horse, Vincent W, Victor T aka Balnor's boy, Hoyt's friend, Justin I, Danny Danster, DJ M, Trey Leigh, The Cray, Disillaneous, Christopher B, Damiel R, Jordan L, Cyborg Version of Josh the Cobold, Targot, Stevie Wags, Hellish Rebukeur, PhD, A Sexy Rat, Showing Hole.

Starting point is 01:37:05 Princess Yar. Jury S. Jack L. Nicholas C. Star of every film ever made in Bohemia, now starring in the Iron Deep production, A Squire Never Tires. Mike H.

Starting point is 01:37:19 Alka Smeltzer Plus. Great Value Gemma. Adam G. Tyler F. Knee Badger. Panama James, Heradrian, Carboro Chapel Hill FPV, Rex Daniel, The White, Deanna De Los Lopez, Cici Lulu, Hercul Pau, The Rabbit Folk Detective, Zellabitfork Detective. Timmy R.

Starting point is 01:37:44 Rayco. Calder Comes Cold. Shout out to the cold cum com-panions. Frosty. Taylor B. The vengeful one wing angel. Cass. Skateboard. Cass.

Starting point is 01:37:57 Steven. Speeds into seasons of Sneezin' C. Hachu. Mike K. Lady Taco and team Incredulity. Jake L. Nick W. William W.

Starting point is 01:38:10 Big Bad Beardo the Mad. Eric McD. Ananarama! Percival Fredrickstein von Mussel Klosowski de Rolo III. J. Dragonborn and their Piranha Princess. Tabitha Sandwich 5. The Sandrayan 6. Ben A. Dave H. Christian S. Showing that sweet blue hoe

Starting point is 01:38:33 7. Dustin S. Danny F. Hawkeye Pierce 8. Book Vars Assistant Izzy F. DPC is awesome 9. Shone the Shade Tree Mechan mechanic of the saleable Dar. Summer Rose, AKA Grand Tare. Kat C, Misa of House and Zunza. Ariel, the occasional mermaid. Selena N, AKA Velaici Raptor.

Starting point is 01:38:57 B, Perky, always! Maxwell J, Lauren H. Nolani, the coffee barista brewing fighter of Linpial and Bohemia. Connor S, Zaleel. Weedgoku69, AKA Gunkit16, experimenting with drugs. Bioquart7, Amber Dextrous, Sullivan H. Jack Hubert, King of the Mole People under Iron Deep, dressed in blue and fighting his way through a bracket-style tournament. Lindsey W, Vaelyn, Carlin C, Emily S, Noah the Bullywog Boy, fighting his way through a bracket style tournament. Lindsay W. Valen.

Starting point is 01:39:45 Carlin C. Emily S. Noah the Bullywog Boy. Hashtag release the filthy guppy cut. James G. Everything Bago, the Aladdin, who just wants to hang out with their pet badger, Stripey. Daddy Master Dandy.

Starting point is 01:40:00 Hon. Eric B. Marcos. Learned the balance druid. Frida Im. Tracy P, the Crick Elf Librarian, Maggie S, See You in Chicago, We Saw You, Hooray, Holly Hyena, Giovanni the Fighter, Akash T, Andrew the Crick Prankswalker, Dufinius, Russell H, a monk named Dilgo, yes, the whole thing, yes, every time. Cody C, Keychain's Pentium II processor, Lorelai the succubus and Kira her busty queen, Turt Cobain the tortle barbarian, Matt M, your friendly neighborhood, yawn and yunkle, Andrew and Sid, John Adams, the right in candidate for 2024.

Starting point is 01:40:49 Meg, the mail carrier manager of Bohemia, James F, Jimmy A, M for L, Austin S, Wayfarer, now asked to do something with the trolls. To get rid of them, turn to page 42. To keep them, turn to page 42. To keep them, turn to page 69! Shane C. Barpo Goodbarrel, Bardbarian Welshlander Garrett G. aka One Big Curd

Starting point is 01:41:15 Mr. D. Ethan B. Havy the Half-Orc Box Clifton Olivia the Enchanting Bard and Jared Soap Opera Cleric who are curious if their pink lemon crochet dice bag ever reached the crew. Gotta check the P.O. box, I've got a big pile in my basement so I will let you know soon.

Starting point is 01:41:34 Winter Slade, Sammy B. Bohemia's finest linguist. Riley S. Fico, Garrett the Artificer. Anthony, the Rattest of Dudes. Josh H. Caleb L. The fairies say om nom nom nom nom Cantrip Dumbledore The bear onesie wearing barbarian

Starting point is 01:41:53 Lexi H. MJ the BFG Artavius Krass Gino T. Mama Belle Derek D. Tristan the Tolletless Honk Shenanigans O'Connor Mios the Great Joshua S. Mama Belle, Derek Dee, Tristan the Tolleless Honk,

Starting point is 01:42:05 Shenanigans O'Connor, Meos the Great, Joshua S., Alexander, Lins W., Angela Pamela the Forever Vindicated, Emma S., Red the Reforged Warforged, Pavu Eskenor, the Goliath Paladin providing service with a smile. Emilia, leader of men and friend to elves. The Grinch tried to pump my gas in Jersey so I put the car in reverse. A cat napping in a sunbeam listening to a podcast. CJ Hampton.

Starting point is 01:42:40 Shell B, Kenna's second favorite sprite girl. She's cast in Power Word Party on Everybody Listening. If you're below 150 HP, you got a limbo right now. Jackson R, Blake H searching for a sweet blue hole with his bestie Big Bev. Papa Skadez, Claire and Cal, and Mimoscades. Oh, it's V, Tommy W, Mike and Lisa sending love to all y'all. Haley the Human, Megan N, TheBigM, Balnor's best friend, Steve, Stephanie of House in Zunza, Jake's Ramen Shop, RIP, Melchior,

Starting point is 01:43:23 the brave Leonin warrior who even cares about the rest of the party. Benjamin A, Sacrificial Otaku, pin name for Callie's cousin who discovered anime and is trying to spread the word all over Bohemia. Jiggy Merlino, Mikel A, Josh Hole, Form, Hooves and Legs, Froakakie Maple, the shy bookworm Ashley Seth E Billy Batson Tory the Draguse, son of Thomas, the blind bisexual goose, bicon and father of 69 signets – this is a real goose, you can look him up.

Starting point is 01:44:00 Wolfwing Pup Escaped the Nautiloid, but crashed into a new place called Alivast and now is working at the Rome Mansion. Michael L. Michael L.S. the second. Cobbers P has been locked away in Jake's basement and is safe I promise. Thanks good to know. NovaCry Parcel Dex Riddlewell Hannah A.

Starting point is 01:44:24 AceDregs High Lord of Critsburg, Joshua F, Darius D, Troy's Mom, Vin Diagram, NurseBetty141, GKC, Teehee, Teehee, Haucinator, Bard of Holding, Clinton P, Cam the Frogman, Swag's Dry Cousin from Gladehome, Can't Wait to Meet Ya, and of course, Dean! Whew! Folks, that is all of our elders. If you would like to join this illustrious council, you can do so by going to patreon.com slash nadpod.

Starting point is 01:44:59 We thank you all so much for listening, we thank our elders for their support, and we will see you here next week. Farewell, goodbye. That was a HateGum Podcast.

Not Another D&D Podcast - C3 Ep. 57: Cold Hard Truths (The Ice Knife Saga)

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