Not Another D&D Podcast - C3 Ep. 6: The Man Wizard & His Bunny Bud (The Mothership Saga)

Episode Date: March 25, 2022

Duck Team faces Grumpy Old Professor Lizer! Calder does a barrel roll, Callie embraces the storm, and Sol confronts his past. Support us at Patreon.com/Naddpod to get access to the ...after-show and a bunch of other Naddpod content! Get tickets to our upcoming live shows at naddpod.com/live.Music/Sound Effects Include:"Sunday Acid Jam" by Georgeke at Freesound.org."A Wizard Tournament" by Emily Axford."Mothership" by Emily Axford."The Mindflayer's Lair" by Emily Axford.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 This is a Headgun Podcast. Hey everybody, it's Emily here to talk to you about Adam and Eve. Who wants better sex? And who wants to start having better sex immediately? The best way to level up your sex game is to go to Adamineve.com right now. Adam and Eve is offering 50% off just about any item. Plus free shipping, which includes rush shipping. More than that, Adam and Eve wants to make your life easy.
Starting point is 00:00:32 They offer discrete shipping as your privacy is a priority. Plus 100% free shipping with rush processing on your entire order. Doesn't matter how much you spend or what you buy, all will be packaged and sent discreetly. So don't wait, better sex is just a click away. That's 50% off one item, free shipping with rush processing. Bring more pleasure and satisfaction into your bedroom. Just go to Adamaneeve.com and select any one item. It could be an adventurous new toy or anything you desire. Just enter offer code PAPA at checkout. That's www.pawatemanive.com.
Starting point is 00:01:12 This is an exclusive offer specific to the podcast, so be sure to use the code PAPA to get your discount 100% free shipping and get it fast with brush processing. Code PawPawW-P-A-W. Goodbye, Sweeties. Welcome to the campaign after the campaign. This is not another D&D podcast. Welcome back to Bahumya, everybody. Bahumya.
Starting point is 00:01:44 I'm your dungeon master, Brian Murphy, joined by Jake Herwitz. Flare for Stairs, called her Kill Day. Oh, I've never won before the episode. I get it, dumb. He said he didn't ever rhyme. You promised you wouldn't say. And you came up with that, I'm really quickly, man.
Starting point is 00:01:59 I dived on the rhyme. I dived on the rhyme. It was really good. Then of course, we've got Emily Axford. Feeling fiery because they read me diary. Goliope. Oh, oh. Deficitating.
Starting point is 00:02:11 That's good. I want Emily to write mine from now on actually. Both really good. And then of course we've got with the best trim of all as usual called Voltainer. Our friendly frog, not a lizard. And yes, I'm friends with a wizard, Salpufa.
Starting point is 00:02:28 Oh, how? What a stretch. It was tight. It was really under the wire. It was such a long walk. It was a hike, frankly. It was a really long hop. There was too much frog stuff of top
Starting point is 00:02:40 to get to the hog. I'm actually not taking notes on it. I think it's great. You could have gotten some lizard faster. I'm thinking more about it and I really love it. Okay. Someone should print a book of poetry that's just all over our intro. Just start around. Make an Instagram. I didn't realize it until I heard this one. It could be a 365 day calendar actually. I prefer the weekly calendar. the weekly calendar. 52 pages. It's overwhelming other words.
Starting point is 00:03:07 What a nod, sheff. Yeah. Okay, everybody, let's go ahead and do a little recap. Yes. So last time you guys raced back to the Church of Moritant to save Krugin and Albin only to find the main chapel abandoned. In the Belphry, however, Gifford and her sea-class squad were not only guarding the scene, but reading Callie's diary.
Starting point is 00:03:30 Fucking Gifford. Fucking Gifford. Not fucking Gifford. Saul busted the door down and attacked them with the help of Albin and Calder, but Callie was too distraught to help at first. However, after a detect thoughts revealed that Gifford was scared of her, Cali faced stepped on top of her and got up in the mix. Eventually, you all triumphed. But Albin revealed some terrible news. Krugin had been kidnapped by A-Class Knights and dragged off to the launch pad Academy to be interrogated by Grumpy Old professor lyser, the dean of
Starting point is 00:04:07 psionics and mothership inquisitor, albincast non-detection spells on you to avoid the psychic grid, and you were able to trick a liquidage player named pitcher into helping you access inquisitor hall. After knocking them out and stealing some sticks, you successfully controlled the psychic staircase and made it to the top of the building without facing any of the challenges. Sorry about that. Right. You should be flawless run. Flawless run. Colder didn't know how much you prepped. Any percent run. Fully flawless. Yep. Once at the top, you rushed down the hall to Lyser's office
Starting point is 00:04:45 where you interrupted him psychically torturing Krugin. He was joined by his bunny bud Claudius, who seems to be getting a sick thrill from the torture, and that's where we are now. Great. Okay. So you are here with Professor Lyser, this tiefling man with red skin and horns, little glasses, stands
Starting point is 00:05:07 over Kruegen, and with him is his bunny pal. Gray and white looks psychotic, like bulging eyes, and just keeps saying things like, yeah, yeah, let's get inside the breeze and mess them up! Let's make them think different things. Is he just me or is this stewed on staple? I mean, Liza, while you're not it, hanging out with that guy. As Callie, as you say that,
Starting point is 00:05:35 you see Professor Liza scoffs and goes, Huh, unstable. Claudius just has potential. Yeah, potential to really mess up some students He was really mean to us in night class. Boo fo so good to see you again and you Penbrook it seems that the boy wizard and his frog pal have once again come face to face with the man wizard and his bunny Bar Great. There goes the ending of that book Come face to face with the man wizard and his bunny butt Great there goes the ending of that book
Starting point is 00:06:15 Albee it's time to claim that title the rabbit is staring at me really intensely. He always does Yeah boss He would always make us just run up and down stairs until we puke. Just not a drill. That's cruel. I like you when you're sick. Everybody go ahead and roll initiative. Oh my god.
Starting point is 00:06:36 That's 12. Whoa. It's all is rocked. 24 for Cali. Ooh. Let's go. Plus six to initiative. Yes.
Starting point is 00:06:44 Wow. The bars get to add to their initiative. I fuck it up. Plus six to initiative. Yes. Wow. The bars get to add to their initiative and I would like that. I would like that. Alright, got an 11. So I'll fuck up with his bunny. It's all flooding back to him. He would wake us up before in the morning and just make us run in circles around our dorm.
Starting point is 00:06:57 That. Until we puke. It's all about puke with him. Was he your coach or just a guy that made you go? It was always on his way. I just looked around for gods and make a run. You didn't have to listen to him. I stabbed him in the brain if they don't listen. He was thinking we didn't listen. They sent us the liser. Very good to Claudius. Cally you are first to act. Okay. Kalle is like seeing this whole situation. She's...
Starting point is 00:07:26 Oh, I heard your rainy boots plotting down the hall. Yeah, I'm being done. And your insecure thoughts. I know a failure when I see one. I am reminded of a particular day when someone was graded a D. Well, I feel like I took that D in turn into a fucking A plus because guess what? We have 100% completion. Yeah, that's right. And that D was more of a P for you. Yes, I heard you pissed your mouth.
Starting point is 00:08:01 Oh, right. Yes, well sometimes the body trays the mind. And my mind is great. And I have a great many minds. Do you see the brains and all of my stuff? So sometimes that must happen to you. Sometimes I, in my adult life, I haven't just pissed myself. Never, yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:18 Yes, you just saw the camera. Yes, my belly's not full of brain shirly. Sorry, sorry. This guy, I guess, is a little too cool for school because he can cast fire Can we need to cast fire? I don't need to cast fire. I have a yes you did that Yes, you have a lighter matches blitz or whatever you need it's fine his brain is on fire He freaking destroyed your stair puzzle dude. I honestly feel a little bit of it. That's just how we walk up the stairs here It's puzzling me. How we walk up the stairs here. It's puzzling me how we walk up the stairs.
Starting point is 00:08:46 Kick his ass, get out of here. Normal ass stuff for us. And you think it's a victory walking up the stairs. Make him piss again. Don't hit. Make me piss. Go ahead. Do it. Do it. He's definitely a psionics professor because he's absolutely getting into my head. Yeah, be careful.
Starting point is 00:09:10 He's Krugin awake. No, Krugin is like knocked out. He's knocked out. You just hear him like, oh, I can't tell you. I can't tell you how this is. OK. Yes, isn't it strange that we're trying to pry from his brain, to find you and yet you plod
Starting point is 00:09:28 Here okay first off. Yes, actually put really quite gracefully. Are you second off? I'm a little too afraid of you So I'm gonna attack your little buddy I'm just gonna go after the funny You can try Yeah, I can you can I can and there's no shame and try it careful I can tell you scared Kelly. He has so many knives hidden in so many places Be careful, okay, I'm gonna I'm gonna thunderous my I'm gonna start I'm like trying to remember what I just learned and I'm like trying to like
Starting point is 00:10:00 Take all this like shame that I'm feeling and just like turn it into like clear crystal like the clouds parting and like turn into like I can see you doubting yourself. You know your worthless and thus you are worthless. I mean, yeah, it's kind of it. Kelly, no. Ah ah ah. Okay, I'm gonna fucking attack this one.
Starting point is 00:10:24 Yeah. Yeah miss with the mine boss. Kallie no Doesn't 19 hit yes the bunny is hit by a knife it does okay I'm gonna do it with a level smile. I'm like I'm scared just might do it kill my coat Kill the bunny round out Absolutely the bunny the bunny is going to gut us and erase our minds and probably like eat our brains or something Yeah, okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm scared Stop looking at him you go see like lightning starting and stopping starting stopping starting something in the night commit to it Do it and I'm doing a fucking fair level smite first level thunderous smite and a fucking flourish Depends of Polish round out their derision do you think that's going to be enough?
Starting point is 00:11:07 Fuck I think that with my friends help it will be power friendship. You're just friends with a fucking bunny Friends so sad for your professor. I have my bunny bud I have my Visage still up can I do an inside check to see if they feel the same way about each other? Yeah, that's gonna be a 16. The 16. The man wizard absolutely loves his bunny bud. He's like a son to me. Yeah boss, we're standing in the bridge! We're the same age! What's that mean? You're right! So that the bridge starts working! I hit him for 42 damage.
Starting point is 00:11:45 And unfortunately I only got a one on my flourish. So my AC is 19. Nice. Still good. It's all right, Claudius. She might be strong of body, but she's just a scared little girl. Yeah. Yeah, I am.
Starting point is 00:12:02 Professor Lizer's turn. It's something so wrong with that. He's going to go ahead and use a power called inquisitors command. I'm gonna need all of you guys to do wisdom saving throws. Is it a charm thing? Yes. Have advantage. Ooh, it's an 11.
Starting point is 00:12:22 19 on the die. 22. Ooh, 22 for Saul as well. Callie and Saul, C, Alvin, and Calder's Eyes. I'm Skull. Milky Wights. Alby. Goldie. Your objective is to secure the mothership.
Starting point is 00:12:40 Oh. You bastard. That didn't take on me. Did it? What did it do? Oh, I was just saying that to mock you. I just used it charms me almost too. God, you are so fucking condescending.
Starting point is 00:12:57 He's like this to 12 year olds. He's a bad person. How do you have 12 year olds are so dumbed. They need to learn things and I don't grasp that. After Liza's turn, that is Calder's turn, I'm gonna need Calder to attack Cali. Go ahead and make an attack. Calder, actually, you know what?
Starting point is 00:13:19 You feel your mind go blank for a second. And then you are in the yard of the barracks, of like the Esri barracks of the nights. This is the day that you are testing to see where you fall in the rank of nights from like A to D class. You are in one of the areas where people can practice spells. There is a practice dummy tied to a post. You have killed all of the other tests so far.
Starting point is 00:13:47 You're smart, you're physically fit, you're strong, you've killed it so far. You're like top of the class. There's this practice dummy across the yard from you. And you see this nice little halfling proctor goes, all right, Calder, go ahead. Let's see your ranged spell attack. And as you sort of, you know, feel like you've got this in the bag, you see this Proctor
Starting point is 00:14:14 is interrupted by Lizer, as he suddenly walks up and holds out a hand. Ah, not just any spell, the handbook, of which I have memorized, of course, says that a proctor can request a specific element. Okay, I choose fire. Fire. And you see the little halfling goes. Alright, very well, Calder. Just go ahead. Light the mannequin, just a All right, very well, Calder. Just go ahead.
Starting point is 00:14:45 Like the mannequin, just a simple campfire. Yes, Calder, go ahead and light the mannequin. And you feel this dude like reading your mind, like manipulating you, like knows that you were worried about that and is putting you in a position where you're fucked. Yeah. I can make fire. I can make fire, but I can't conjure it with my magic. I can make it the standard way.
Starting point is 00:15:18 Then why don't you just do what you do best and swing your sword at it. This big arm's small brain swing metal. Do it now. That's fucking socks. So I'm going to attack the dummy. Attack. Colder dummy. What are you doing?
Starting point is 00:15:42 Why is he whispering dummy and looking at me?? Oh God, Calder lower your sword. I'm stuck. The dummy. I don't need fire. I can chop anything down with this blade. Only in 18. I'm 19 right now! Oh God, Calder you're 18 too.
Starting point is 00:16:02 I think I like it. I'm like seeing the way he's getting manipulated and being like, this guy does is to fucking everyone around him, not just me. And I'm like, cold air has been like my rock for so long, so I just like, become so solid to block it. Because I know he's not in a good way. I just fucking reverberate him.
Starting point is 00:16:23 He's reverberate. Whoa. After Calderstrand, that is Saul's turn. Which one I'm making? He does have two attacks. I think you only make, let me see actually. When controlled in this way, the target can take only the attack or dash action.
Starting point is 00:16:37 I think when you make the attack action, you take two attacks, so you have to do it again. Oh, no. That's fine. All right. Shout out to the duke. Yeah! Oh, I said, yeah, Callie, you do it again. Oh, no. That's fine. All right. Shout out to the duke. Yeah. Oh, I said, yeah, Callie, you block it twice.
Starting point is 00:16:49 Yes. You see, Calder, Eyes are glazed, so instincts are not all there. Can't beat you in this scenario. I look at him and I just say, you're the fucking smartest person I know. That's why I said, you would wear this home. You hear that echoing in your vision.
Starting point is 00:17:06 Oh, I'm not training your... Kelly. Salt. Right. That is your turn, okay. You see Albin and Calder have gone Milky-Eid. Oh no, that's not good. Just the frog pal then.
Starting point is 00:17:20 No boy wizard to help him. He's a man wizard! I am the man wizard. We'll see about that. Can I do a quick survey of the room? Yeah. He said there was a lot of like brains and jars. A lot of brains and jars. That's a natural one. I'm getting heated. And you have no clue what these freaking brains are for. I just got me gassed up. Always the frog pal. Never the wizard. Oh you. No, no.
Starting point is 00:17:49 I need to be a wizard. I found my own strength. I found my own power. Did you? And yet you are here with all of your friends who have turned on you. Turned on me? Yes.
Starting point is 00:17:58 They are just. The boy wizard and his frog pal, the boy wizard and his frog. And they're seeing what I've known all along, that you are a weak pathetic man who prays on people that deserve so much more. I'm gonna go over to Alden. I'm not thinking straight.
Starting point is 00:18:13 I'm gonna go over to Alden and try and shake him out of it. Yeah, I'll say you can go ahead and make a wisdom saving throw for him essentially. Okay, great. Do I use mine? Yes. Okay. Come on, come on. Okay, great. Do I use mine? Yes. Okay
Starting point is 00:18:34 13 13 is not gonna pass the DC of Lizer. Okay, sorry, you're just the frog enemy I guess as he's saying that can use my bonus action to activate my gauntlets and do for damage to him Yes, he needs to make a dexay. Okay Fails Ray. That's going to be 2d6, is Claudius within range? 10v3. Yeah, yeah. They're both gonna take five for stamina. Cool, he passes actually, Claudius does.
Starting point is 00:18:54 Okay. He's so agile. Yeah, I love seeing blood. It just gets me going. It's my heart's beating. I can jump around! Whenever you would try to complain to the other teachers, you would just run away! After Saul's turn, that is unfortunately Claudius' turn.
Starting point is 00:19:11 I knew it! Claudius is going to, uh, Callie just, uh, fuck him up. I'm gonna knock you out! Then we're gonna roll around in your head! Uh! All right, fucking bring it on! You fucking dudes already in our front set! Don't get too excited, Claudius! I'm getting that fucking subtext. Ah, Claudius, 13 hit in the first attack misses. Yes. 21 in the second attack.
Starting point is 00:19:50 He? 26 damage. Oh, geez. And you see that as Claudius swings into you, he does the exact same thing that you did to Liza that day on the field like he stabs into you and there's this burst of power Good showing Claudius. Wait what the fuck? What's the fuck what? He's allowed to do it. I'm not Claudius is gifted. You are troubled. Oh my god
Starting point is 00:20:21 I am such a fucking fool for taking so long to figure all this stupid shit out After Claudius's turn that's Albin's turn. Oh, no, oh But he used all his third-level spells on non-detection. That's true Albin you can only take the attack or dash action Albin pulls out a dagger and tries to stab some no Albin stand man, wizard. I am the boy wizard. The boy will overtake the man, just clearly having a hallucination
Starting point is 00:20:52 and touch the stab some. I'm gonna protection Paladin with my umbrella to give him disadvantage. Sick. Misses horribly, not a good physical fighter. Ah, I just like slowly dodge out of the way. I'll be, come on. Yes, but yes, not a good physical fighter. I just like slowly dodge out of the way. I'll be, come on. Yes, but yes, not a good physical fighter. That's back around to Cali's turn.
Starting point is 00:21:11 Okay, I look at Kolda and I say, I'm so sorry that I've freaking chickened out on the first fucking rounds and I'm gonna go after this fucker. The bunny? Liza. Oh, you've already hit the bunny. Okay, then I'm gonna look at Liza and be like, actually, I'm strategically deciding to hit the bunny. It's not that I'm scared of you anymore.
Starting point is 00:21:32 I give you a milky-eyed nod. Oh, wait, could I have just use my action to shake him out of it? Calder's gonna recover on Liza's turn, which is next. Oh, okay, okay, great. So then I, that's definitely gonna hit, it's a 27 to hit. Yeah, that hits Claudius.
Starting point is 00:21:49 Then, you're a stable. You're pretty easy. Hi. You are the craziest person I've ever met. It's 20 minutes. And I bet you're actually pretty fun to hang out with socially. He just hangs out outside the bathroom
Starting point is 00:22:03 and scares you when you come out Okay, I'm gonna use another Another flourish another Second-level smite and another oh, yes calling on the power of lightning very unpredictable So Absolutely all my fucking rain clouds a fucking party. I'm so fucking absolutely all my fucking rain clouds are fucking party. I'm fucking I'm so fucking I can't hear his insults over a thunder clap. Yeah, it's really fun that you're like a rainy day Aladdin because when you smite it's just like a rainstorm of dice. 41 damage and I get a plus four to my AC. 41 damage, Jesus Christ.
Starting point is 00:22:45 Yeah, just this lightning strike down on Claudius. Instantly looks super fucked up. I'd start still to worry. Ha, ha, ha! Oh, shit. Flex Claudius, she's dangerous. Just stay back. Yeah, stay back.
Starting point is 00:23:01 That's what it really is. You said I was unstable, but actually, I'm just fucking dangerous just fucking scared me power your instability is dangerous and all of you are failures in one way or the other I you work against mothership you work against the city of isry Just because we don't slot into your perfect armor or perfect little scabbards Just because we're not tools for you to use. Doesn't mean we're broken or unstable. Also, he has to do a, I've been forgetting to do this with thunderous smite. He has to succeed a strength saving throw or be pushed 10 feet away from me and be knocked prone. Shit.
Starting point is 00:23:37 My spell save is only 15. Uh, 11. Uh, yeah, you fucking knocked him back into the wall. Oh, careful my bunny bud. Ah! Looks like he busted up some of your brains back there. My brains are unbustible. That is Liza's turn.
Starting point is 00:23:56 He's gonna roll to see if he can get back his little charm thing. Calder, you come out of it and you see that you have your sword up to Cali. Cali? Cali? It's okay, you did awesome. What did I do? you come out of it and you see that you have your sword up to Kelly. Kelly? Kelly? It's okay, you did awesome. What did I do? Mmm. You called me a dummy and attacked me? You failed again.
Starting point is 00:24:15 No, but called it. It was really awesome. I failed to cast Fire, failed to not attack your friend. Can we say that with all the lightning that's been going on? I like a lit of piece of furniture behind me. You you you made me on fire. I cast fire You cast fire. How do you like that? I think we both know deep down that you didn't cast fire. I'll tell you one thing
Starting point is 00:24:43 I didn't fail when I couldn't attack my friend Well, technically I did I'm really glad I didn't I'm done listening to you and I'm done trying to do what you want me to do We'll see about that. I'm just gonna go ahead and roll Uh, I'm gonna roll in front of the table five or six. He gets his charm thing back You see Albin also knocks out of it. Huh? Five or six he gets his charm thing back. You see Albin also knocks out of it. Huh?
Starting point is 00:25:08 Why do I have a knife in my hand? Oh, what was I doing? Albin, you stabbed me so hard you're very strong. What? I stabbed you so instantly subscribe. Oh I was trying to make you feel good you didn't stab me. You miss oh good. Yes. I'm very weak. Why would it work? I'm rolling from the table five or six he gets his thing back, come on. Three, he's not gonna make it. Yeah! That's it. Where's your thing go? We didn't get your thing back.
Starting point is 00:25:32 I have several things. Lysers gonna go ahead and use an ability called mind fire. Reaches his hand out, and is gonna cast this first on Kali Kali you feel a burning in your brain like a piercing headache go ahead and give me an intelligent saving throw 17 damage and are stunned until the start of Liza's next turn. So you guys see Callie's eyes go milky as she like clutches her brain and like falls to her knees. She's feeling sad! You're gonna feel dead. What is your absolute deal? And then Liza, I complain to the Dean so many times about this behavior. How are
Starting point is 00:26:26 you on a school payroll? Because he's actually a really good guy. He is. In what contact? He's going to you. You're the worst guy. He's a great bunny bud. And now for the frog pal. Frog pal, go ahead and give me an intelligence saving throw. It's gonna do the same thing to you. You feel like a piercing headache. My intelligence save is negative one. Here we go. Wow.
Starting point is 00:26:52 That's a seven. 13 damage and you are also stunned until eyes are next turn. Always just the frog pal. Sometimes that's all people need. It's just a little pal to help him out. You have a headache. I really do.
Starting point is 00:27:08 You just clutch your head and fall over. Help him, Advil. I can't. This is terrible. After Lizer's turn, that is Calder's turn. Okay, so you've got this crazy bunny. He's still prone. Yeah. Yeah, so that's what you get a advantage on tax. Okay, so I want to say to this guy that frog bell isn't just
Starting point is 00:27:30 Albin's frog bell. He's all of our frog bell. Oh, and isn't that a door and Callie's not unstable. Oh, she knows exactly who she is And I'm gonna kill your fucking rabbit And I'm gonna kill your fucking rabbit 25 and a 15 did 15 does not hit because 25 does I'm gonna action search. Here we go 19 19 hits Wow two net ones on the last Two hits two hits that is 28 damage calendar calder finish this bunny What are you doing? No? No? No? You know what I don't need fire ice kills just the same
Starting point is 00:28:18 Frost Put your brain on ice a giant ice spike emerges from your hands and spears right through Claudius' eyes. A bunny bod, no! My little bunny bod! His tenure is over. He's master with you. He did actually have tenure, so that's the only way he was gonna be able to be get fired. Well, you killed my friend.
Starting point is 00:28:43 You killed my friend, but how will you feel when you all kill each other? I don't think we will. Pretty bad. I think you're going to piss yourself and you're going to die. Unlikely. Yeah. So that is your turn. You have this piercing headache.
Starting point is 00:28:58 And you close your eyes, you try to clear your head, you try to get your mind right, and when you open your eyes, you see that you are in the halls of Launchpad Academy sneaking around with Albin. You see that Albin has been incapacitated. You see he's been like, like, a Lizer has cast hold person on him, and he's not sneaking around the grounds again. I can't move. Don't worry. I'll use my tongue to hit a magic lantern, that should distract him. You see Professor Lizer rounds the corner. Sneaking around again. Are we, Bufo? You don't understand, sir, there's a bigger threat here. Oh, there's a bigger threat. There's an arch-mage loose. We have to find all the keys. Oh, there's an arch-mage loose. There's an arch-mage loose.
Starting point is 00:29:48 And what would a little frog know about arch-mages? You two think you're so important. What I wouldn't give to just get to root around in that little mind of yours and pluck out all of the things that make you so irritating. Good luck because they're all on the surface and if you can't read them from here then you'll never find them. Interesting. Well, if you are to simple to take my threat seriously then perhaps I'll root around in the boy wizard's brain. You see... Kshh! Cast hold person on you. You see Albin starts to try to run away
Starting point is 00:30:28 and Lyser begins chasing after him. You are then, pfff, back in real life and you are stunned. You cannot near. Albin! That is... He's a stern, clot. His number dead spasms on the ground covered nice. That is Albin's turn.
Starting point is 00:30:44 I'm going to just do an attack. I'm not as great at attacking as I am at doing spells that buff people. Ajik May, Isle May, Shanticus. Oh, you're fucked now. You're fucked. You're fucked, dude. He's going for it because Magic Missile, amazing.
Starting point is 00:31:03 What is that? That's not the name of the spell. It's Ajik May isl may you fucking dance He manages to do 10 damage your toes. Yes, ow. It hurt. I know Well, that's the warm up now. I did magic to make them Undetectable you didn't see them with your mind you freakin moron. Yes You didn't see them with your mind, you frickin moron. Yes! It's all I am not some moron.
Starting point is 00:31:26 Yes you are. Calder live my hand so I can have five albi. Sure. Tally that is your turn. You are stunned. You like solve, feel this like piercing headache. And as you clutch it, you close your eyes and you see that you are in the sparring yards
Starting point is 00:31:44 of one of the barracks. Professor Lizer is holding a sword out and waiting for you to approach looking kind of bored as you walk up. I just want to thank you because I failed. I can sense your thoughts. Okay,. Okay. You cannot possibly hit me. Your emotions are so unstable that I can predict every move you might make down to the twitch of your muscle fibers failed. I mean, just because you can read someone's thoughts doesn't mean you can comprehend that potential.
Starting point is 00:32:21 I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that. You don't believe that, do you? No, no, I don't. I don't, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just words together and have a that. You don't believe that, do you? No, I don't, I don't, I don't, I'm just, I'm just worse together and have a baby. You can't possibly hit me. Yeah, no, no. So why would you even try? Well, because I have to try, because if I don't try,
Starting point is 00:32:33 then you... You might have to go back to the Feywild. Yeah. You're scared of your own family? See, he's reading your mind and laughing. Okay, you're gonna go back to your own family. That is private. That is private.
Starting point is 00:32:47 My emotions, they don't fucking hobby. You know what I'm just gonna fuck a job. They know what I'm gonna do. You're gonna charge up your smite, but you feel yourself unable to move in this version. And then reality comes back and you are trying to swing your sword at him, but you cannot. That is back around to Liza's turn. I'm going to roll in front of you guys to see if you can get his charm thing back, which is very bad.
Starting point is 00:33:14 That is a one. He does not get it's back. This guy also taught me geometry. Isn't that weird? I am a fantastic math teacher a genius I can't imagine you inspiring anybody he got a D because he's D class and everything he does Hello, that one I did get a very bad grade of geometry. Have you ever liked anyone besides the bunny? Just the bunny that you killed you're a bad judge of character
Starting point is 00:33:42 You're a bad judge of character. You're a bad judge of character. He's gonna go ahead and do mind fire on Calder. Calder go ahead and give me an intelligence saving throw. You're actually pretty good at this. It's like the stairs, Calder. That's only a nine. A nine.
Starting point is 00:34:01 Calder, you take 17 psychic damage, and you are stunned until his next turn. He's going to go ahead and do it on Saul. Saul, go ahead and give me an intelligence every day. Okay, come on, I'm gonna use my big dice for this one. Come on, that's crit, I feel a crit in the egg. We go. Head empty, only hate for Liza.
Starting point is 00:34:24 Head is always empty. God damn it. That's a seven. You take, fuck. 15 damage and you're stunned. God. Woo! That is Calder's turn. Calder, you are right back where you were in this weird training yard. Congratulations. You hit the dummy. Congratulations, you hit the dummy. Very, very, very impressive. Yeah, just just body is so good. Oh, your arms so strong, so strong. Just fail me, sir. And the charade. That is Saul's turn. Saul, same thing. You are back in the hallways. You see Professor Lizer grabs Albin by the back of the robe, throws him against the wall. Albin begins screaming. No!
Starting point is 00:35:11 So help! Help me! Help me! You see Lizer is attacking Albin with like a psychic shock and you are powerless to help. You know, a lot of our training here wasn't real, but what you did to him was real. And you're gonna pay for it. You are stunned. That is Albin's turn.
Starting point is 00:35:29 Ajik May Isselmay! That's a good spell! Magic Missile again. It's a great spell. He's so good at it. I just did non-detection before those were my big guys. That's a solid 11 damage. That's great. Yes. Oh bad. Can I spell do more damage than that? That is back up to Cali. Hey, I'm pretty much out of everything. So I'm going to attack him.
Starting point is 00:35:59 You're by yourself again, aren't you? Your friends stunned. Too scared to help. Even if I were by myself, I'm really regretting the fact that I've been such a fucking impressionable little shit. Warn it. Warn it. Oh, doc.
Starting point is 00:36:18 Warn it. You're here. Warn it. Well, come on, I'm about to attack this guy. Right. And then I will just try to attack him. Sweet. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha They should have never let you in the D class program I don't know how good it fits You don't know how fucking I'm a fucking barred You can't control this
Starting point is 00:36:50 I can teach you to control it I can teach you to control it Then why didn't you offer? Huh? You could have taught me to control it But instead you made me feel bad about it And nurtured it in everyone fucking else And controlled everyone's fucking mind That's all you want to do just control people your opinions are just a fucking means of controlling other people
Starting point is 00:37:12 32 damage and then I'm gonna fucking do it. It's probably gonna knock me out, but I'm gonna fucking Face tap over him and land on Yeah, he's looking pretty fucked up by that. You're mad. No, I'm fucking in the sky. Yeah. You jump over him, face step and fall down on him. You guys are both gonna take nine damage.
Starting point is 00:37:43 He's very fucked up, but still standing. That is his turn. I'm gonna go ahead and roll a D6. You guys are unstunned, you guys all come back. Nice, I roll a D6 to see if he gets his mass charm thing back. Okay. That's his, he finished. Yes, he is however going to cast his once a day,
Starting point is 00:38:04 mass suggestion. Okay, okay. What does he suggest? Yeah, he's so mean. I need everybody to make a wisdom saving throw. You see, as he super fucked up, he gets up from having just like gotten jumped on, like Elbow smashed by Callie,
Starting point is 00:38:22 bleeding out of his nose, out of his mouth, looks over at Claudius who's super fucking dead, cast mass suggestion and goes, alright, you came here to save your friend. I'm going to leave and you're going to unstrap him and ensure his safety. Everybody give me wisdom saving throws. Is this a charming thing? This is. But does this count as charm? You suggest a course of activity and magically influence up to 12 creatures of your choice,
Starting point is 00:38:54 creatures that can't be charmed or immune to this effect. Oh, wait, oh no, I just have advanced. So you, I'll say you get advantage on it. Yeah. OK. 15. OK. I only got a three. I got a 17. The only person
Starting point is 00:39:08 who passes is Saul. Yeah. Everybody else. This sounds like a pretty good idea. You guys look around the room. You see that you guys keep getting stunned. You guys keep fighting each other. You guys are like, you know what? All we came here for Kroogan. He's right. Let's get Kroogan again. This has been a shit show. Draws a draw, Saul. Draws a draw.
Starting point is 00:39:29 Saul's Vesage appears and it is a beautiful horned helmet, much like callers. Wow. And you see that the thoughts just like bounce off of it like bullets. Then Lyser's gonna use his movement to just move 30 feet down the hall, runs away. The rest of you guys think this is fine.
Starting point is 00:39:50 Calder. Reasonable. You think this is, it is your turn, but you think this is normal. You see, Krugin is strapped down. I, I go to Krugin. Oh. You go over to Krugin, you start on strapping him.
Starting point is 00:40:02 So that is your turn. You see Lizer getting away. Okay. Is Albin, what's Albin's him. So that is your turn. You see Liza getting away. Okay. Um, is Albin, what's Albin's status? Albin is the same thing. We should just unswrap him and get out of here. That's really reasonable. And I, can I use a bonus action flurry of blows
Starting point is 00:40:15 to give him all a smack before I run after Liza. They are under mass suggestion. Okay. So to see you, if you want to do this, you're doing it alone. I owe this to Albee I run after Liza sweet. Oh, what are you doing? He proposed a really logical solution. It's just normal. Yeah, we were even it was the One of us against him and it was I feel bad. I killed the bunny I had the bunny was fine
Starting point is 00:40:44 Bygons, anyone else? The students are going to be cheering in the street because you killed that freaking rabbit. Don't worry about it. OK, Saul, you with just your movement are able to chase down Lizer. Don't be a fool, Saul. As he's saying that, I just activate my spectral gauntlet.
Starting point is 00:41:01 I'm just going to uppercut it as hard as I can. Send. Go ahead and make your tack rolls. 22 to hit. Yeah. I'm gonna try to make that a stunning strike. Jesus. Okay, so that's going to be a DC 15 con save. Con save. Why would I be strong of body when I'm so strong of mine? That's all. There's more than one way to get to a mind. It's only a 13 fails. Great.
Starting point is 00:41:25 Okay, so that's going to be just six damage from the first attack. Looking very fucked. Gonna do my second attack. With advantage because he stunned. With advantage because he stunned, the monk mind-meld is here. Ha ha ha ha ha. Shout out to the two crew, but I did get a 10. That's gonna be 17.
Starting point is 00:41:42 17 hits. Alrighty. Six damage on the second attack. the two crew, but I did get a 10, that's gonna be 17. 17 hits. Alrighty. Six damage on the second attack. Saul, finish him. You. Wow. I use my spectral gauntlets to just bear hug him and drag him kicking and screaming back into the room.
Starting point is 00:41:59 You've done my friends. You, you full. And I do, I do kick over a couple brains as I go. You know, psh, psh. So we made a deal, it was gonna go and we got crewgin' it. Yeah, we got crewgin' it. Perfect. I positioned my gauntlets in a way where they're right up
Starting point is 00:42:14 on his larynx to the point where he's about to tap. Psh, psh, psh. I know you're better speaking with your mind. Psh, psh. So speak that way and release my friends. You see he nods and the rest of you guys, the mass-aggestion spell is broken. Oh, kill his guy. And then I say everyone get a turn on the dummy. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie.
Starting point is 00:42:48 I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie. I'm not gonna lie.
Starting point is 00:43:04 I'm not gonna lie. That was cathartic. Oh, I have to say that that was like such a mind fuck. But it's like in me realize, that this whole system has been a fucking mind fuck. Yeah. Am I alone? Yeah. It's worse down so that we would be drones in their army. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:20 God. They put our emotions through the ringer so many times, but they don't get to decide. No, who we are It's just like it's just other people's opinions and that guy fucking liked a weird ass rabbit That rabbit was so strange. Yeah, you don't know the half of it I wouldn't take his I wouldn't take his advice for no Where'd he get called sounded like he wanted to just it doesn't even seem like he really had psychic powers. Like he just liked to touch people's brains.
Starting point is 00:43:49 Yeah, and stuff. It seemed fucking weird. It was a sexual thing for you. Yeah. He was off. He was off. He was really off. He was really off.
Starting point is 00:43:59 Oh my god, Kruggen. I have to be honest. Wait, wait, wait. Before Kruggen though, should we maybe make it look like the bunny did this? Yeah, Krugin. I have to be honest. Wait, wait, wait. Before Krugin though, should we maybe look, make it look like the bunny did this? Yeah, right, yeah. Two, Liza. Like they fold each other.
Starting point is 00:44:12 Like they fold each other. Yeah. So it wouldn't be unbelievable. We have to give the bunny all the weapons that we use. So pieces of the missile, right? Burse up his fists, give him a knife, give him a dagger. You guys just put like three weapons in each of Blodding's hand, and lay him on the top of the bursted meat that is lighter.
Starting point is 00:44:31 Kelly, you know, I use my water to like get rid of all of our finger prints. You're really good at calligraphy. Can you write a note that says tonight I will experiment on my bunny buddy to alter his brain? Oh, first off, thank you for noticing, because I feel like the content of my written word is really, really shaky, but the letters themselves, the script is really good. So yeah, I write a beautifully scripted, and tonight I'm going to experiment on my bunny friend. Actually, the handwriting looks a little too good.
Starting point is 00:45:01 I'm going to tell. You write journals essentially for Lizer to that say that he's gonna Experiment on Claudius See how he was to get your diary red and Krugin is Past out and just kind of like muttering to himself. Oh should we give him a potion? Yeah, let's give him a potion Let's see. I'll give him one of these
Starting point is 00:45:23 Potions of greater healing. Yeah, give him a potion of greater healing Krugin stirs back awake. Oh Yeah Kelly Krugin hey, I'm so sorry that we got you into this. Oh, no. Yeah No, I got myself into this. Yeah, I've been on On the wrong side to be on. We're on the same side as you know. Oh well, there were some people like Maagablan that were sort of donated for ideological reasons
Starting point is 00:46:00 and they were trying to kind of kick and track me towards it. And I guess I kind of got no choice now, right? Yeah. I'm going to join us. Fate is giving you a little kick on the book. Yeah, all right. I'm going to go back to bed for a sec. Oh, of course, yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:18 We can kind of just like carry you out. Yeah, but we'll steal one of the moped from the student center. Please do. We actually have these Liquid it sticks that fly. Oh, let's lash a bunch together like a raft. Yeah, and it'll be like a little um Yeah, let's try let's fly it on a freaking flying Stick raft before before you go to bed. Yeah, I got these from your place. I even them the photos. Oh you can. Wow. Oh wow. Oh thanks but I didn't think I would get the go back for these. Yeah wow. I also grabbed the
Starting point is 00:46:55 moped on my way out. Yeah go ahead go ahead. Yeah. No both equally important. All right we should get out of here. This episode of NADPOT has brought to you by Bird Dogs. There are company that makes pants and shorts, so no matter where you fall and the age old battle between the two, you can rest assured that Bird Dogs has you covered. Now we all know when the legwear war begins and we're forced to choose a side, it's gonna be difficult. Luckily Bird Dogs has made the decision of which pants and shorts to buy a little easier. Bird Dogs stretchy khakis are designed to fit
Starting point is 00:47:29 slimmer through the thigh and leg to give you a truly sculpted look. And instead of making their clothes out of restricting cotton, Bird Dogs invented a cloud knit fabric that looks just like khaki, but stretches so you get a way slimmer fit without having to sacrifice movement. And trust me, you are going to need all the movement you can get when you and your brothers and legs are out there on the battlefield kicking the shit out of your rivals.
Starting point is 00:47:53 So when the lower body battle begins and brother is forced to kick brother, make sure you are wearing bird dogs. To get yours and a free Yeti-style tumbler, go to bird.com slash pop-off or enter promo code pop-off at checkout. That's birddogs.com slash pop-off or promo code pop-off for a free Yeti-style tumbler. You won't want to take your bird dogs off, we promise you. Okay, that's it for me, go team pants and enjoy the show. How are these liquidage sticks go? Can we just fly up super high? You guys think that the liquidage sticks are going to work on campus.
Starting point is 00:48:33 There's essentially a magical thing that enchants them, so you can leave campus on the liquidage sticks and then switch to a different device or call maw goblin essentially to get picked up. So we can fly straight up to stay out of like, yeah, that's great. Yeah, and then we can, and then we can kind of look for like a great, and that Margoblin can come pick us up.
Starting point is 00:48:56 Right, we've got the role of X, we can give her a location. Great. All right, and so, you see, Albin looks over at all of the brains that all look like this like powerful network. You see they're all like thrombing with energy. Of course, psionics. This is the source of the large pads lies. These are where the projections are coming from. Projections that make the students think they're in
Starting point is 00:49:24 danger and force them to act. This is where like all of those dangerous beasts and archmages we thought came from. This is where the mothership propaganda is perpetuated. Yes. Can I just ask though, is there something nice about having like a safe way to learn bravery? Is it maybe just propaganda because it's in the wrong hands? nice about having like a safe way to learn bravery. Is it maybe just propaganda because it's in the wrong hands? Maybe I can just put all these brains on ice.
Starting point is 00:49:54 Yes, I suppose that's the question. Look. I'm sorry, it's a big question. No, it is a big question. Our time at the launch pad was the way it's functioning as we spoke. Yeah, it's absolutely ripped. It ripped. It ripped. It's sick as shit. But then it turns into this man wizard and his fucking sick bunny friend. His man, the man wizard is someone who came out of the system and decided that it was good. When I first grew up,
Starting point is 00:50:23 I had so little and then when I came to the school, I had every opportunity and everything seemed open and possible. And sometimes the whiplash of that just leaves you lost. I feel like there's got to be a better way to teach. Yeah, you're right. Yeah, you're right. Maybe we could send our own message through the brains. Tell the students. I do too. To all the students. Browse.
Starting point is 00:50:48 Like, pirate radio. That's cool. Let's say the chapter's own. Number one. Sionics Blow. Number one, the side guy's suck. And then whatever else you want to say. Yeah, I think it sounds like it's your school.
Starting point is 00:51:04 So I like, you know, it's your micro family. I know I'm talking to these kids. Alvi, you've been practicing and writing your own story and being honest with yourself more. Do you want to say something? Yes, yes, I think I think perhaps we should do it together. So the man wizard and his frog friend. You know, you just like, I would like just be a wizard. I prefer the boy wizard is from a house still for some sure
Starting point is 00:51:28 It's familiar the adult boy wizard now. Yes, it's almost let's not try to Try to come it's too late Yeah, there's a lot of men wizards. We can't yeah, there's too many men was you were just saw an alby Maybe we're just saw an alby, but also the boy wizardness room. Yeah, I know, it sounded weird. You got it, I like that. Don't change a good thing. Okay. All right, all right.
Starting point is 00:51:51 Let's send a message then. See, Alvin walks over. I have an ability as part of my massage. Yeah. I know I'm going on about my massage, but. I wonder if it's a visage. I think it's a visage. It is visage, it is visage, it's okay. It is visage. You were saying visage. I think it's a visage. It is visage. It is visage. It's okay.
Starting point is 00:52:05 It is visage. You were saying visage and I wanted it to be the thing, but then I kept hearing visage and I did. But visage sounds better because it sounds like dressage. All right. Yeah, I've got something for my visage. Guys are below. There you go.
Starting point is 00:52:17 Visage. I know. I have something for my spectral visage that could help with this, which is I can address a crowd within 600 feet Oh sick. Yeah, I'll say you take each other's hands. You reach into These pools of and Albin reaches out and grabs a call during Cali as well Myself to it. Yeah duck lens a wing
Starting point is 00:52:43 I'm sorry. I totally forgot about you. There is a lot going on. You're a good duck. You were a sight for sore eyes. A visage for sore eyes, really. And using... Bye, Sagi. This dark has a new name.
Starting point is 00:53:00 Foster by Sagi. And using Saul's Vesage. You guys feel yourselves able to manipulate to these brains that are projecting these images across the campus. Students of the Launchpad Academy. It is I, Albin Penbrook, and his frog bell. Salam befo! Hi, how's it going? Hello.
Starting point is 00:53:27 Class of 10 years ago. Class of, yes, however many years ago it was and it was so many years ago. You are being manipulated. The grand adventures that you're having are simulations. You are not fighting hydras. You are not fighting ghosts. The people that are lifting you up are lifting you up for their own purposes and they will tear you down and they will make you drones until you are just another cog in the machine that is mothership. And if they tell you that the strength you have isn't good enough and isn't
Starting point is 00:54:05 right for mothership don't listen because the things inside of you the strength that you have the power that you find and the power that you and your friends bring out in each other that is what's going to bring down this dome go chanters go chanters he would ever kind of boy wizard in frog pal that you are don't let anybody put you into the box You do not have to work on toilet paper if you don't want to make exploding toilet paper and throw it through the mothership windows Down with a mothership down with mothership down with the launch pad burn the college campus to the ground Oh, oh, I really like we could still like you know keep some of the departments. Let's get out of here. Groogan, we've got a hot exit.
Starting point is 00:54:46 Alright, as you say that, Cali, you guys suddenly hear a voice in your head go, you're damn right. You have a hot exit. A hot exit from this earth, Jander Scum! Oh, I thought he was making a butt joke. No, you see, looking beat up and ragged at the front of the room is pitcher. Wow. The captain of the side guys' liquidity team
Starting point is 00:55:15 in full liquidity gear with a stick at their side. They are surrounded on all sides by creepy members of their team. The side guys, some of them are like minor mind flares and various other psychic beings. You guys do hear commotion outside. It sounds like you guys have essentially just alerted the whole launch pad.
Starting point is 00:55:40 That you're here and causing trouble. Okay, well these liquidity sticks will take us as far as the edge of campus. Should we just bust out the window and try and go? What? So there is no window here? Right. But you could try to blow past the liquidity players.
Starting point is 00:55:54 You see that there are about 12 of them? Uh-huh. And Alvin does look up at you, Solomon goes, Let's freaking cheese it. Ha-ha-ha-ha. Oh, wizardly escaped. Everyone down to cheese it. I don't know, I really want to kick this guy's ass.
Starting point is 00:56:09 Albin gets on a liquid stick and flies. I'm going to hop on Albin's liquidic stick and just put my fist right in front and form a frog battering ramp for him. Sweet. Albin and Saul are on the same liquidic stick. What are you guys doing? I want to create a little ice ramp
Starting point is 00:56:25 so I can slide down it, hop on my broom, but I would like to kick picture in the chin on my way out. Sweet. Can I press the digitization and light? Oh, I'm picturing them on broomsticks, but they're on liquidage sticks, right? They're on liquidage sticks right now. Liquidage sticks are broomsticks,
Starting point is 00:56:41 but with a big net, right? Yeah, it's actually with a flying lacrosse stick. Yeah, I just want to light the netting of their lacrosse stick on fire. Sweet, absolutely do that. You flick your hand out, you light pictures, the quidditch stick on fire. No, no, this is meant for the wall of fame.
Starting point is 00:56:58 I specifically do it behind Calder, so he can't see it. You light it on fire as Calder does the little ice ramp flies past Pitcher sort of knocks them in the shoulder Albin and saw fly through Saw you put out your spectral fists and hit them knock them over bull them over you guys race down the hallway I say good game good game good game good game, good game. As I point all of them. The game's not over yet. Chatter scum. See when the final side guys are sad ball. You see, they begin taking on a defensive position. We're going to do a chase
Starting point is 00:57:34 encounter. Everybody go ahead of the initiative. That's a net one, Jesus. That is a 23. Oh, I am down to absolutely nothing though. So 23 for me as well. And Callad, do you have Krugin on your room? Or look what you're sick, sorry. Yeah, I do. Okay, sweet, yeah, you scoop up, as you set, pictures, the Quidditch Stick on fire, you scoop up Krugin.
Starting point is 00:57:56 Oh, yeah, all right, I don't think I can concentrate on this magic right now, I'm kind of out of it. Psychically tortured and whatnot. Lean on me Kruggen. Lean on me. Instantly falls asleep on your back. It starts to slip off the stick, yet to hold them with one hand. It's actually, you can do this anywhere.
Starting point is 00:58:12 Right. So here does a pillow. Here is how this chase is going to work. This is a chase. There will be new obstacles each round. You can do an action or a bonus action, but not both, because your focus on flying. So we don't need to worry about things like,
Starting point is 00:58:29 I'm gonna dash or whatever. We're not dealing with movements. You guys are just ahead, they're trying to catch you. The pursuers are trying to knock you off your liquidate sticks and subdue you. The attacks they do aren't going to affect your actual HP unless they like overtake you and capture you. They are targeting your stick and your ability to hang on to it.
Starting point is 00:58:50 So that is a 20 HP threshold after that you fall off. So the sticks essentially have 20 HP. So just write down 20 HP. That's what you're using for this encounter. All right. You can do RAM or shove attacks to attempt to knock enemies off their sticks. These are contested acrobatics checks or it could be spellcasting. The idea being that like you're kind of psychically controlling these liquidate sticks
Starting point is 00:59:15 or using your magical ability to fly it. Okay. You guys also have a reaction that you can use each round. One is to try a Dodge maneuver. DC is half of the attack roll. So if something would have hit you, you can use your reaction to try to get out of the way. The other reaction is a scoop.
Starting point is 00:59:34 You can scoop in and scoop someone if they've fallen off their stick. Each stick fits two people comfortably and three people very uncomfortably. Keep in mind that the more people you have on one stick, easier it is for the enemies to take you out in one fell swoop. If you are knocked off your stick, you're overtaken by the enemy and will likely be captured.
Starting point is 00:59:53 Whoa. So, Saul, I believe you did grab your own stick. So right now you're on albums, but I'll allow you on your turn if you want to fly on your own, but that's entirely up to you. But you do have one. Okay. So you've got it like disenchanted in your hand right now. Great. You guys all speed through this long hallway outside of Liza's lab in initiative order. Callie's got the highest initiative followed by Saul. Calder's a little bit behind. Dark hallway, just the glow of the green brain
Starting point is 01:00:25 goo behind you. Once you're done with the hallway, you take a steep dive into the stairwell. The bricks on the wall though begin to glisten with moisture as tentacles pop out between the cracks and the psychic home monitor Walter awakens. I said no flying in the stairwell. We're leaving. Walter is going to go ahead and try to grab two of you guys. So the two brooms that are in the back, because Callie zips right past.
Starting point is 01:00:58 I know Callie and Saul got the same initiative, but we have a homebrew rule here that whoever has highest decks or highest initiative on paper goes first. Callie has highest initiative because she's a bard. Don't add us. So the psychic tentacle comes out, is gonna take a swipe at Saul and Albin together
Starting point is 01:01:17 and take a attack on Calder to try to grab him. That's a nine to hit call her. Does not. So, Calder, you're able to dip under the tentacle and get away. No, flying, all again. Not flying, we're escaping. Psychic all again.
Starting point is 01:01:35 You should really worry about your stairs because we just absolutely beef those before. You're supposed to go up the stairs, that's what I wanted. Oh yeah, I thought we were cool. You wanted us to absolutely just ace your stairs, huh? Of course I did. Calder shut him down. We killed the professor, so don't worry about the flying.
Starting point is 01:01:53 What? Yeah. Calder does a little loop, do you loop, gets around the tentacle, going after Saul and Calvin. That's an eight, misses. Great. This is, we're using RAC for this. You're not, you are using your AC for this. Okay, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:02:07 Great. So I guess you're gonna use, if two people are on the same one, whoever has the lowest AC hits the broom, but doesn't hit either of you with an eight. Right. Ah! Keep stirring, spin around and continue down this tower. 12 of these liquidity players, these side guys,
Starting point is 01:02:25 are chasing you guys down. Walter is going to take two attacks on the slowest of them. Hits one of them. All right, misses another one. So one of the side guys gets wrapped up in a tentacle. No, bros, go on without me. Secure the victory. Kali, that is your turn.
Starting point is 01:02:46 You're automatically moving, but is there an action or a bonus action that you want to take? You see that these side guys are being strategic, so they are like spread out and moving into different formations. Flying V, flying V, side guys. Okay, can I use my action to like shoot off a roll,
Starting point is 01:03:08 like a roller text, a roller text, a roller text, a roller text, a roller text to Mark Goblin and be like, we are making a hot exit and we need a fucking hot getaway car. Grace, mom. And like basically like ask Saul to tell me like where like a storm grade is or something and then we can just Sick yeah, I pointed to the storm break. We used to go to to cry
Starting point is 01:03:31 Actually, I know that one okay Crying great yet you guys you guys do know that there are you know sewer grades and stuff throughout the campus Um, but um you get a message back from aablan saying to get to the one on like the main quad on the main campus. Okay. So I'll show you that off and then I take off into the sky. Sweet. So Maagablan is on her way.
Starting point is 01:03:57 You guys need to get to like the center of campus though away from the Sinonic school. That is Sal's turn. Okay. So I'm going to look at the one that's closest to us. And I turn to Albin and say, Albin, do you have a little time for a quick cantrip? Always have time for a cantrip for you, Frog Pal. All right, I need you to just electrify the shit out of me.
Starting point is 01:04:16 Just instantly puts us in on you. No questions asked. I'm just shocked to. Extrust, baby. You see that Sal's throat sack fills with lightning. Oh, Jesus. And then it deflates and you see the lightning appears in his fists and he slaps them together
Starting point is 01:04:31 to do a big thunder wave attack. Sick. My once a day spell. Sick. Yeah, each of their sticks also have 20 HP. So go ahead and do your attack. Okay. It's going to be a con 15 save for the fail.
Starting point is 01:04:45 Hell yeah, okay. No, I was doing the triple D. What are you doing? This is what you get for using a shoddy aluminum stick. You don't know shit about Lacks Quidditch. Ah hell, that's only six damage. Six damage, but they're push 10 feet away. Yeah, you see, you knock them back,
Starting point is 01:05:04 put them in danger of getting grabbed. You Yeah, you see, you knock them back, put them in danger of getting grabbed. You know what, I'll say pushing them back in this situation, Walter will get an attack to try to grab them. Nice. So you do this lightning attack, hits their liquided stick,
Starting point is 01:05:16 they begin spiraling backwards and flying up, Walter goes, got you, who the kid? An offering to you, a Walter, our greatest ally. That's only an eight. You see, they dodge it, and they stick on you guys. They're still following. That is Calder's turn. I'm just gonna target some random guy.
Starting point is 01:05:37 And there are no random guys on the side guys. You mean that janitor down there? Calder, no. No, I want to, the guy that said there were no random guys. That guy's just about as random as they get. My name just happens to be Guy, but I'm not random. Aren't you Randy Guy? Ha ha ha ha!
Starting point is 01:05:54 Well, yes, I... Tends to... Get horny, and I call... I say Randy when I'm doing an Austin Powers impression. He's right there on the back of your jersey. He did a joke! He did a gooo! Man, I... I can't hurt this guy, who's next to... and Austin Powers impression. He's right there on the back of your jersey. It's a joke. It's a gul. Man, I can't hurt this guy who's next to him.
Starting point is 01:06:08 Ha ha ha ha ha. He's the team gul. Ha ha ha ha. Look, next to him, it's normal guy. Norman guy, get him. That's me. I'm his brother. His brother, Norman.
Starting point is 01:06:19 Okay, you're going to have to norm in guy. I'm gonna, I wanna chuck a snowball at Norman guy. It's great. So that's a deck at Norman Guy. Great. So that's a deck save of 15. Okay. They do get a 15. Fuck. Then my snowball clatters against the wall and does nothing.
Starting point is 01:06:33 You hear a Walter just goes, Oh, why? You betrayed me. Sterevaster. Why? That wasn't meant for you, Walter. After Calder, that is the 11 side guys. The side guys do not have high attacks, ratings,
Starting point is 01:06:51 but they do have great teamwork. All right, everybody, pass it around. I want to see some assists. They start doing that, I don't know what the fuck it's called, but it looks like a cradling, the cradling, back and forth of these like arcane balls They're doing assists so half of them are doing the help action and the other half are shooting with advantage So first a ball will go at a cally Even with advantage got him rolling like dog shit 12. Sorry. I'm not a more of a defensive player
Starting point is 01:07:22 Second one Jesus goes against Calder. Two sixes. I can't roll for shit right now. Both next one goes against Saul and Albin. Yeah, they know where championship material. There's nothing they can do. Hit Saul and Albin. Of course.
Starting point is 01:07:36 I was concentrating on the catch trip. I wasn't looking to maneuver. It's okay, you can stop shocking me now. Nine damage to your guy's broom. So it's down to 11 points. You see this liquidage ball cracks the back of your guy's net of the liquidage stick. You guys begin spinning around.
Starting point is 01:07:53 Oh, this is the type of goofy hygiene I live for. Albin, I never played on the field. I only know how to do towel stuff. Oh, we could die. This is a, people, kids die. I put a towel on him. I put a towel on him. You put a towel on him.
Starting point is 01:08:07 Next one goes at Cali with advantage. Another crew. First one hits. Can I try to dodge? Yeah, you can use your reaction to try to dodge. It's gonna be only a DC 10. 12 plus five is a 17. I know.
Starting point is 01:08:20 Cali, you dodge out of the way. All right. After that, another one goes for Sol and Albin. This one still hasn't assessed. They miss, even with advantage. Last one goes against Calder. This is the one whose partner was grabbed by Walter. I'm going in alone, Randy, do something.
Starting point is 01:08:43 That is still a 21 to hit. Wow, alright, I'll try to dodge it. DC-10. That's a 22. 22. You dodge out of the way, Calder. You do a little loop-to-loop, get around the ball. You guys fly out of Inquisitor Hall and see that chaos has begun to overtake the launch pad academy.
Starting point is 01:09:06 There are all these flickering monsters that are appearing, like the whole system is malfunctioning. Some students are protesting, this is bullshit, what is this? You told me I was a special boy wizard. Just attacking their teachers and things like that. Okay, so that confirms that it is all boys here. It was wondering why I hadn't met girl wizard,
Starting point is 01:09:27 or woman wizard. Yeah, the gender ratio is terrible. Yeah, no, that makes sense. You see a bunch of girl wizard sitting around being like, we knew this, right? We all, we knew this. I am the girl wizard. Oh, where are girls?
Starting point is 01:09:40 We'll get to your graphic novels too. Please, please, we needed. It's really easy to get boys gassed up to do terrible things. Yes. You guys see some students are protesting, but others, including a lot of the psionics students and faculty are trying to squash sort of the growing rampage. In fact, you see several campus security nights, which
Starting point is 01:10:01 would probably be about like B class. Probably not the guys you want to fight right now after having just fought Lizer. Are flying in on these handheld flying drones. They are heading towards the main quad of this area, but you guys do see there's a path through like a tight alley through the dormitories that you could take to avoid them. Could we like fly through a dormitory and go through someone's closet and get other clothing on us? It's not you.
Starting point is 01:10:30 You guys fly and just crash through somebody's window. You see that there was a boy wizard sleeping, somehow slept through all the commotion. Glass breaks as you blast through What happened on her pal what's going on? You see his roommate gets up. I don't know He's to the other which way to the laundry room. I don't know if you want my rope or. And we need your weekend clothes.
Starting point is 01:11:07 The clothes are too hot. I mean, he can close okay as you guys fly through this dormitory. Side guys also fly into the building behind you. The other leads you to like the laundry room. And I guess everybody go ahead and do acrobatics checks to try to grab or slight of hands checks to try to grab other Roads I got I got a 30 Jesus Christ You said acrobatics. Yeah 13 sweets. I'll say with a nat 20 and a fucking 30
Starting point is 01:11:41 As you guys are flying down the hall you see three students a very big one a very small one and a medium one Just walking out of the laundry room holding baskets. This is perfect. I go for the medium one You scoop of the medium one all takes the basket So you just throw a basket on your head. I don't know what's going on. Keep flying, buddy. Focus up, side guys. Focus up. Classic, chant or mind games.
Starting point is 01:12:14 They're cleverer than they look. As you guys dodge through, the side guys are chasing you guys down this hall. There are other people. There are walls. There are turns. Everybody give me deck saves or spell casting saves. 14. Okay, passes, 23. Passes, 24. All three of the liquidity sticks stay up.
Starting point is 01:12:36 You guys dodge like swinging open doors, fly in and out of windows as these side guys keep trying to surround you and overtake you. These guys are also going to make saves. Of the 11 side guys, there are four fails. Careful flying, handle your sticks, handle your sticks, side guys. You see, yeah, four of them like clips something
Starting point is 01:12:58 and start spinning around. They're still on your tail, but they have taken some damage that will question the integrity of their flying abilities. At the top of the order, Cali, that is your turn. Okay. I'll just come to like a really abrupt stop, so that someone re-arrains me and then make it seem like it was their fault.
Starting point is 01:13:17 Okay. Like an insurance stamp? Yeah. I'm running in the shirt. Okay. I'm going from the criminal background. Randy Guy is right behind you. Okay.
Starting point is 01:13:28 Contested acrobatics or contested spellcasting. It's up to you. A acrobatics. Jesus Christ, World of Three. That's an eight on their side. Okay, I got, it's 29. Jesus Lord. Yeah, you see, um, Randy.
Starting point is 01:13:39 So do I, do I have to roll a deception to get my insurance to blame him? I'll say. Yeah. It already has. You see, Randy guys not going to be around to argue with insurance because you do a quick stop. They hit you in the back.
Starting point is 01:13:55 Like it probably hurts a decent amount. It hits you and Kruegen. Oh, jeez, Kelly, where'd you learn to drive? But you see Randy. It's Sherrod Scam driving. But you see Randy guys, liquidacid, goes out from under them. Ah!
Starting point is 01:14:11 As they fly. Can I reach out a hand for them to join? Randy come with us. We can get you out of this mess. You're too horny to die. Randy, your story isn't over yet. Yes, of course. And it's gonna try to yank you off of your broom.
Starting point is 01:14:25 Contested athletics check. Oh, no. Randy, that was tacky. 16. 16, 14 for Randy. Yes. You beat Randy. I tried to give you a fucking check
Starting point is 01:14:38 to two of your story. I tried to kill you. I tried to give you a novel, but you want a short story. So have it that way, then. No one reads that shit. You were better than this, Randy. Fuck off. You guys beat Randy on the athletics check.
Starting point is 01:14:53 You stay on the the quadristic and you throw him off. I turned a, I turned a crewgen. I really didn't see that one coming. I could have told you that if I was more spatially oiled, what's going on at the moment? That is down to 10 the side guys still chasing you guys. That is Salon Albin's turn. As I mentioned, I have something called
Starting point is 01:15:12 Word of the Spirit, which lets me talk to everyone within 600 feet. Okay. And then I also have advantage on intimidation checks. Oh, sick. So I wanna just like flare my spectral visage up into this big like flaming Helmet this red flaming helmet, and I just want to shout at them. It's this really what teamwork is Huh, you think you got what it takes. Give me an intimidation check
Starting point is 01:15:38 Fuck oh with advantage It's a seven and an eight shit, okay Oh, with advantage. It's a seven and an eight shit, okay? I felt like a seven or eight performance on my part. Uh, that's gonna be a straight ten. A straight ten? Okay. I'll say with a ten, there are ten guys. So we'll say one of them, you see a Norman guy looks pretty intimidated.
Starting point is 01:15:58 Like, somebody would have advantage on attacks against them. Like, he was like right behind you guys. Like, I'm going for it. I'm going for the triple deak. And then sees you turn around and start yelling at them and then starts going, oh shit, my stick is so slow. It's so slow, I'm in the back. I'm in the back now. I need you to do windspritz. You're not showing any hustle out there.
Starting point is 01:16:19 I'm in the back. I see a spectral whistle appears in front of Saul and he blows it really hard. It's weird. Oh, sweet. That is Calder's turn. Norman, you're, you're sibling crashed into my friend, Kali. And I saw the whole thing. They were directly responsible.
Starting point is 01:16:38 And now that they're dead. I think Sharon's just gonna need someone to pay. It's not even paying their debt. I don't think they're dead. I think Sharon's is gonna need someone to pay It's on you to pay their debt. I don't think they're dead. Do you think he's dead? You're the next of kin. Oh my god I'm gonna try to knock Norman off. I mean his credit score is dead and that's what's important Sweet cullter you tried to ram into Norman guy with your stick. Um go ahead contestant Acrobatics or spellcasting. 15 on their end. That is a Nat 20. Jesus Christ.
Starting point is 01:17:12 Yeah, you clock Norman Guy, who runs directly into the trio that you guys just stole laundry from. Oh, the Nat 20, can I grab their wallet or insurance information? Yeah, of course. They've got mothership insurance, unfortunately. So you're going to have to contact the mothership.
Starting point is 01:17:30 That's a lot of TGI. It's okay, I think I can make this work. I think I've got the deception to make this work. I have the diamond plan. That's going to come in handy. Here you go, Kelly. I pocket it. You pocket it?
Starting point is 01:17:43 I'm going to say this. I say I sniff the card and I'm going to say it. I say I sniff the card and I'm like, mm smells like mole here in the potion. Sorry. Kelly, Kelly, you see the otter pal looks up and you go, is it good? I go now. I scoop you. I'm so sorry.
Starting point is 01:17:56 I'm a big year for a minute. I like really politely pull up and like let him out and give him a bottle of water all the way Little bottle for your little buddy Wait, you can be your own buddy. Hey, wait Live your own life Follow your own path. That's right tell him tell him frog bell He calls me that but it's okay, right? I get allow him to do I allow him to do that hang on tight That is the side guys turn. They're gonna take attacks with advantage on you guys or the four of them are one guy is left without a buddy
Starting point is 01:18:29 There's nine first one against Cali. They go flying V again This is the only quasi look what it's reference I know which is a mighty ducks reference which is hockey, but that's kind of similar where the ducks We'd make more sense for you to be in like zone defense so I think. Where? The duck starts yelling at them for coming up here at infringement.
Starting point is 01:18:50 That is a 24 to hit, Cali. That hit, so I'm gonna try and talk. The reaction, okay, DC 12. Not one. Not one. Oh no. Cali, you had Krugin get hit in the back by this psychic liquidage ball for nine damage as you guys spin
Starting point is 01:19:06 around. Next one is gonna go after Solon Albin. It's all because I dropped off that fucking auto. I still kept him. The auto is providing perfect balance. The auto was helping. Little buddies are important. Yeah, also that huge robes are wearing right now. It's making it really hard to maneuver.
Starting point is 01:19:22 It's just not my side. He's caught out a bunch of stuff. Do you want the basket, Kali? That is 18 to hit Salon Albans. Oh, oh. My armor class is 19. But you are on the Albans. It's lower.
Starting point is 01:19:35 So I'll use my reaction to dodge. Sweet. Go ahead and do a deck save. Qua. DC nine. That's a natural one. Natural one. You guys take six damage.
Starting point is 01:19:46 This is almost as bad as that time we had to play upside down liquidage in the Netherrealm. Oh, the boy wizard and his frog pal in Netherrealm games. Wait a minute, the Netherrealm was just the shed in the back, wasn't it? It was. You guys keep flying. No, you went to the Netherrealm. Thank you.
Starting point is 01:20:01 Your liquidage sick is extremely fucked up. Another two, a duan assist. Sick pass, bro. And take a shot at Calder. 20 to hit you, Calder. That'll hit. Let's try that dodge. Go ahead and try to take a dodge.
Starting point is 01:20:15 DC 10. 21. You're dodging with like flair. Like you do a barrel roll and spin out of the way. I did a little holy shit. We should recruit him for next year. I did a little figure skating up in the bridge of North.
Starting point is 01:20:28 Oh, Miguel, this guy's really good. Take him out first. Wait. And take another shot at you. That one's a 21 to hit. Okay. You don't have a reaction anymore. You can't dodge.
Starting point is 01:20:40 So right after your barrel roll, another two guys pass back and forth and just hits you with a ball in the face. Six damage. And then how many guys is that so far? That's six advantage on Saul and Albin misses even with advantage. Flat roll against Callie and Krugen. 17 to hit.
Starting point is 01:20:57 Doesn't. Actually, would hit Krugen though. You're a little bit slowed down by having somebody on your back. Have you already used your reaction? Okay. so they're gonna do some damage to you. Seven damage to your stick. At the end of the round, you guys zoom out of the psionics dorm and get back onto like the main part of campus. You see that students here, now you're starting to get into the area of the school where there's like the enchanter and the vocation schools and stuff. You see that a lot of them have
Starting point is 01:21:28 come out to do battle against like the psionic students and the faculty. Some people are trying to get away. Some people are trying to like destroy the holograms and stuff and like getting other people amped up. You guys see that there's this like big burst of green and red magic that comes together and explodes into fireworks all around you. Everybody go ahead and give me deck saves or spell casting saves as you try to dodge it. 18 plus 5.
Starting point is 01:21:53 Yes. 23. 21. Just the 13. Everybody passes. Oh, nice. Guys, dodge through the fireworks are able to get through without anything catching on fire. But that is the side guys. They're all going to go ahead and make saves. Guys, Dodge through the fireworks are able to get through without anything catching on fire,
Starting point is 01:22:05 but that is the side guys, they're all gonna go ahead and make saves of the nine side guys. You see, three of them, their liquidage sticks catch on fire and they fall to the back, they stop the chase, there are six that are still on you guys. All right. Callie, that's your turn. Is there a danger to me if I shove someone
Starting point is 01:22:25 and it doesn't work? No. Okay, then I will run my insurance scam again. Ha ha ha ha ha. 14. 14, that beats an 11. You see the side guys are dwindling, but pitcher tries to rally them.
Starting point is 01:22:40 Come on, we might have lost the offensive line. That's a liquidage thing, because whether or not it's a lacrosse thing, it doesn't matter. This is all made up. Yeah, offense defense in mid range. Yes, there's, we're just the mid range of the defense now, but that's all we need. Keep them from scoring. They don't even understand their own game. We understand it.
Starting point is 01:23:00 I think they're just really talented athletes, but they have like no cohesion or anything like that. Yeah, that's what happens when you raise a bunch of stars, tell them they're all special. Wait, what's your record this year? My personal stats are off the chart. Yeah, wait, what's the team record? That's what I'm curious about. We're all in six. Bitter is a ball hug.
Starting point is 01:23:19 Oh, no. Um, sweet, so we're down to five side guys. Uh, Salon Alvin, that's your guys turn. Callie, what is your broom HP? My broom HP is three. Okay, so I am going to use my action to toss my broom back to Callie. Sick.
Starting point is 01:23:36 Cool. And then I'll just... That's your effortlessly, no skill track. I'll say since you're doing it as an action, I'm not gonna make you guys do an acrobatic checker. Because also you have some psychic control of it, so you throw it, you start to psychically control it, cally controls it as it gets closer, you catch it,
Starting point is 01:23:54 you grab it, I think you should. I stick past unprecedented. Yeah, we just communicate with each other, and we work together and we care about each other. It's basic stuff. Yeah, but you do it out loud, you freaking do it. I don't even know me own stats, okay? and we work together and we care about each other. It's basic stuff. Yeah, but you do it out loud. You freaking do it. I don't even know me own stats, okay?
Starting point is 01:24:07 All I know is that we as a team have a hundred percent completion, right? That's right. That's right, you freaking losers. And also your O and six, Chantor's rule. I guess that's my turn then. Sick, okay. So, Callie, you've got a new stick.
Starting point is 01:24:21 I'll say that you have this ready. You can essentially scoop yourself if your current stick gets broken Can I shout down to the students on the ground? Yeah, you're not gonna get paid for the book deals read the contracts What it'll be important later That's impossible the child wizard and the squirrel pal is so successful. Oh How are they doing this? They didn't give us an advance, but they said that. Like, once it hit a certain thing, they'd give us a commission.
Starting point is 01:24:49 Just every five years, they reboot it with a different animal pal. This is so incriminating. I have a squirrel. That is called a stern. Five side guys. I will try to ram somebody sick. I'm gonna look like I'm spinning out like I'm crashing my
Starting point is 01:25:07 My liquidage stick. Yeah, look at this surprise look. It's freaking noob Yeah, even order for all weight. Oh wait We do a triple axel and hip-check the guy. Oh, yeah triple axle offensive line classic liquidage stuff I rolled a 19 that's a 23. Jesus. 16 on their ends, you knock another dude off their stick. So there's only four side guys left, but also in a, these are the only people
Starting point is 01:25:34 that are actively pursuing you. As soon as you guys stop for like a second, the whole fucking school is gonna descend on you. Right. Or at least all like the bad guys and the status quo people are going to. So you guys kinda gotta keep running. So, top of this next round, you guys get to the main part of the campus where you see that there is this like sewer grate that looks like a collects rain water to basically like prevent flooding, and you know it does feed into the main like sewer
Starting point is 01:26:02 system of the city. You guys can enter it, but you have to break off the great first. You have to like break it. Kali, you are first to act. What is it gonna be more powerful if I like ram into it with my stick, or if I ram into it with also my rapier out front? This would probably require using a weapon, yeah. Okay, I'll do that. Sick, go ahead and make it a tackle
Starting point is 01:26:28 Nat 20 15 damage with a fucking Jesus Christ with a nat 20 you see as you pull out your rapier You see Krugin like hazy Lee goes I don't know if like a poking weapon's gonna do that good at breaking breaking through something. You just see like a little bit of lightning come out the end. Electro-cute, the sewer grade, and it just explodes in one shot as you just lance through it, like a jowster. I turn back and I'm like, oh, Kroogan, I don't know if you've had yet.
Starting point is 01:26:58 I'm stole me now. Oh, right, yeah. Wow. Sweet, so you guys all enter the sewers and they start as these narrow halls But but then begin to open into like wide dank tunnels full of moss and algae along the stone walls um, you can hear ma goblins vehicle Rumbling in the distance, but before that you see the psionic students enter the sewers behind you guys. Their eyes begin to glow and you hear pitcher's voice in your mind go.
Starting point is 01:27:30 Time for your losers to smell how you look. You freaking shit stains. Are you gonna fart in our brains? That was the weirdest fucking thing. You're the weirdest thing ever. Do you have to take like a long time to think of that? I am brilliant. Is it thinking like your whole thing? You can.
Starting point is 01:27:50 You can hear each other's thoughts. Did you all hear him running through? Was he practicing different options? No one adds to that. No one adds to that. No one adds to that. No one adds to that. No one adds to that.
Starting point is 01:27:59 No one adds to that. No one adds to that. Those words stink, man. I see that this green, brown stream begins to collect ahead of you and prepares to turn it to a wave and fly up at you guys. Everyone, go ahead and give me deck saves or spellcasting saves. Okay. This looks like a bigger challenge.
Starting point is 01:28:17 This takes up almost the entirety of the tunnel. 15 for Callie. Okay. Shout out to the two crew. That's going to be a nine for Saul. That's a 19 for Kolder. Okay, Kolder and Callie both pass, Saul, not only fails and takes damage,
Starting point is 01:28:37 but fails so much that you guys get knocked off of your stick. Can I toss a stick back? Um, you can. I'll say as your scoop reaction you just toss the stick right back to Solomon. I extend my gauntlet 10 feet and catch it. I think I had been getting it warmed up so like the AC's going the like music is pumping. It's ready. Sick. You changed the presets on the radio. So Solomon Albin are back on the stick.
Starting point is 01:29:06 That is Salon Albin. I got four of these dudes left. Okay. And you're racing down the sewers. You do hear Magoablin in the not so far distance. You think she'll probably get to you guys pretty quick. Yeah. What I'm going to do is I'm going to use my gauntlets
Starting point is 01:29:19 to hold onto the stick. And I'm going to basically use them as a rope and launch backwards and use my feet to kick one of the other side guys. Sick, go ahead and give me a contested spell casting or acrobatics check. 16 on this side for spell casting. Fuck me, it's just a 12. Pitcher dodges out of the way and kicks back at you and goes... I'm ready for some rough and tumble, liquidage.
Starting point is 01:29:44 Once again, keep in mind that I'm the star player and have great stats. You don't know how liquidage works, that would be a foul. You don't know shit about anything. When percentage is a stat just so you know. I watched Albin play so many games while I prepared hot steaming towels for him. You don't know anything. That's right, No one cuts an orange slice like sol buvo. Is that your book? Please stop talking about it.
Starting point is 01:30:09 That's from the book. Sorry, the boy wizard, the frog pal, and the missing orange slices, yes. Don't tell me if you find it. Yes. There's grandma and series fell off at that point. It's really no steak. It's really so low steaks.
Starting point is 01:30:22 It turns out we just misplaced the dude, so it doesn't even, it was sort of a, when we tried to go like a comedy route, the whole thing was just an advertisement for Dole. I guess that one sounds miserable. Call do, that's your turn. Great. I wanna hop up on my liquidage stick and kind of surf it
Starting point is 01:30:40 like a snowboard and veer it into somebody and try to punch them off. Sweet, yeah, you jump up, try to swing down on them, contested check. 14 on this side. I should have stayed seated. That was, that's only an 11. They block and stop you. We don't need the flag V. This is the flying box. And you just see the four of them packing tightly together. It would be a no, that's a no.
Starting point is 01:31:05 What's a no? I have low energy surf on my board. Or a diamond. You should have been a diamond. OK, switch to form of diamond. Sci-Guy's go! I just took your idea. I know.
Starting point is 01:31:17 Oh, it was our idea. Shamelessly. After Calder, that is the Sci-Guy's turn. I'll say, last few people who attack them, I'll say Saul and Calder a that is the side guys turn. I'll say, last two people attack them. I'll say Saul and Calder a little bit closer. So first couple goes after Calder. Misses, even with an assist. Next one goes after Saul now.
Starting point is 01:31:33 Okay. 19 to hit. That does hit. Can this count as a projectile? Can I use my reaction to block it with my deflect missile? Yeah, you can use your deflect missile. Okay, so I'm gonna roll 1d10 plus 10 to see if I can reduce the damage. Okay, geez.
Starting point is 01:31:47 Yeah, I think there's no way they can hurt you with this. Seven damage. Great. So that means I catch it. I'm gonna try and throw it back to my reaction. Oh, you're gonna throw it back now? Using my spectral gauntlet, I like catch this flaming ball. It like spins in my hand.
Starting point is 01:31:59 I'm gonna try and launch it back. No, he's got silver snorke. Ha ha ha. Oh god. I just scream spoilers. And I'm gonna chuck it back. This is just gonna be a normal attack I think. Use your hands as against the rules. I know that. I know that for a fact. Does 11 hit? 11 does not. They dodge out of the way. Go chase it. You got to get the snorke. I tossed it all the way down that tunnel. This is not an official game. It's not a big fire down there. Yeah, you shitty water does like all the gas down here. There's no rat friends down here. Hey, what's
Starting point is 01:32:39 good about outside of my little sewer house? Move! There! There's an order you can move in with. At the end of that round, as you guys pass the title wave of murky water, you see Ma Goblin's subterranean vehicle finally rumbles into view on the outside in Blaster turrets, are a Grem, the hob goblin, who took you down to Ma Goblin in the first place. And another hob goblin are sitting in these like turrets and they begin shooting at the remaining psionic students with these like charges of energy.
Starting point is 01:33:12 Okay, this definitely isn't allowed. This isn't allowed. It's time for you to look like we smell. You look like you smell. That was so good. That was fucking hilarious and so smart. that was so good. That was fucking hilarious and so smart. It sucked. You see echoes in your mind as picture and the other three are hit by these balls of energy. Their liquidity sticks explode as they fall back and roll as they crash into the ground in this tunnel
Starting point is 01:33:41 and land in the shit water. That record is now 0 and 7. Mogoblin opens the hatch of her vehicle, and you guys are able to swoop in and enter as you feel yourselves like leaving the boundaries of campus, and the magic of the Quidditch sticks begins to give out. You crash onto the floor of Mogoblin's vehicle and manage to escape safely for now.
Starting point is 01:34:09 And that's where we'll end our session. Wow! Wow! Wait, one last thing. Yes. That all felt like a roller coaster. Does Maagablan have embarrassing photos of us at the scariest part of it? Whoa. Oh, I got an amazing car. Like a roller coaster ride. Yeah, certainly. Okay of it. Whoa. Oh, I got an amazing question. Like a roller coaster ride.
Starting point is 01:34:25 Yeah, yeah, certainly. Okay, great. The ducks, the only one making a normal face. Yeah. We all have terrible. Yeah, you guys are really faces like all the way in ice-tearing because so much wind is hitting your faces. Halfway through changing, Callie, you're
Starting point is 01:34:42 I'm a bleakie at every single one. Callie, your robe is way too big. called his blinking while he's in the middle of trying to get up to surf, so like only one leg is not the other leg is out. They're just so nice. Yeah, sweet guys. Thank you all so much for listening. You can listen to us talk more about this over on a short rest over on patreon.com slash napa That's any
Starting point is 01:35:09 Does anybody have anything they'd like to plug? Yeah, dude, we got some live shows coming up. Oh, yeah, brother. We got live shows We got them in Austin. We got them in Dallas, we got them in Dublin, London, Manchester and Edinburgh. Check out nadpod.com slash live. I believe London is very, very close to selling it out, so don't sleep on that. Yeah, and there's our all in May. So check them out, guys. We've also got Austin and Dallas coming up in April.
Starting point is 01:35:40 So check out nadpod.com slash live, buy some tickets. Check them out. Yeah. Anybody else? I would love to buy some tickets. Check them out. Yeah. Anybody else? I would love to plug some stuff from our PO box. Great. That's okay. Yep.
Starting point is 01:35:51 Stephanie F. Sinous each a marathon medal. They listen to us while training for the Akron Marathon. We're so glad we can be across that finish line, Stephanie. For the Akron Marathon? Akron. Oh, okay. Okay.
Starting point is 01:36:04 Okay. I will be wearing that proudly and telling people I did a marathon. Right. Yeah, we're stealing a lot of marathon value. Thank you so much. Actually, I don't update my LinkedIn. Rob sent us a big sampling of their friend, Christophe's Candles. Christophe's company is Cantor Candles. Christophe's Cantor Candles.
Starting point is 01:36:22 Oh, and these are really cute. They're really nice. There's a store and Santa Monica, by the way. If you're local, go check them out. Go give them a smell. Fortify STR, Fortify Strength. There's a stone of soothing for hand-cog fishes back. It's designed by actual physical therapists, which seems better than whatever Hank's been doing. I could personally use that. I pinched my neck, so there my neck. I'll see you guys next week. It'll be perfect. What else we got? Oh, Rowan, H sent Emily a painting of a Goose-Honking
Starting point is 01:36:52 Lighting. Oh, yeah. It's a reference to from our 3.5 campaign before we ever played publicly. Oh, wow. I could take a feet natural spell and cast that's so cute rowing, but do keep the references to the current campaign It's hanging in my office I hung it in my office. It is very cute. It's like a real gallery quality piece I would say To feed a pee since I'm handmade bookmarks based on all the characters I can't wait to stick those in a book. I've thrown away my iPad so that I can place for it. There you go Use the bookmarks and then hand a w from Bristol sent us all books They sent me an arman animation art book and a copy of the giant jam sandwich for my daughter
Starting point is 01:37:34 Thank you so much Hannah can we get to her actually I already have read it to her and she really liked it So there you go a plus work Thank you so much for the books. Thank you so much for everyone that sent us things It's always lovely to receive little gifts and trinkets 1920 Hill or stab a new number 222. Loosefully, it's California 900027. Yes, everybody. Thank you all so much for listening. You can follow us on social media They were made in right now use at Teach Murf is me at call D is called well at the extra assembly and at checker Which is Jake and you can tune about the show using hashtag nad pod that's any DD POD
Starting point is 01:38:05 We are we are! We are we are! We are we are! We are the youth of the nation! We are we are! We are the youth of the nation! We are we are! We are we are! We are we are!
Starting point is 01:38:13 We are we are! We are we are! We are we are! We are we are! We are we are! We are we are! We are we are! We are we are!
Starting point is 01:38:21 We are we are! We are we are! We are we are! We are we are! We are we are! We are we are! We are we are! We are we are! We are we are! We are we are! Time to thank our benevolent counsel of elders starting with Brad D. Jeffrey S. UC, later Mick Skater, Matt M. Jordan D. J. Cutter W. Dylan B. Dungeon Mama. Danielle the Dastardly Dame, Beard Mandan, Scott Durham, Danny P. Michael Mick D. Vincent W. Miss Turg Cole, Victor T. Balnor's boy forever, Dominic Persson, Andrew B, Justin I, Ragnar Faredwin, TJ M, Kaley E, Elena M, Tray-Lay, The Cray, Faye, Jared E, Christopher
Starting point is 01:38:55 B, Damial R, Cyborg version of Josh the Cobald, Philbert the therapy duck, love to see it, Richard X Machina, Michael L, Taylor S, Sir Carl, Jury S, Calum L, Jack L, Sam L, Wow, that's a lot of L's, Nicholas C, that he is thunderous turtle, Samuel B, Mike H, Martin P, Matthew E, Colton B, the front half of a horse costume, Adam G, Nebadger, Panama James, Andrew the Bard, Captain Sijil, Nathan C. the assistant king to the assistant king of Iron Deep, Hail to the Hammer, Hail to the Hammer, indeed. Diana, C.C. Lulu, Barnes and Ador, Michelle O. Heracule, Poirot, the rapid folk detective. To me are, Crocaholic, Lucas B. Rayco, It Kevin. Cullders, Cultcom, I love to read that one.
Starting point is 01:39:48 New York, Cass, skateboard, Cass, Steven C. Michael M. Mike K. Lady Taco, Joy T. Nara, Jake L. Nick Wolf, Brave The Badger, Esme M. Mutton, The Mad Druid, has been trying to undo his friend who has been stuck as a polymorphed sheep for three weeks feels like it's been longer than that at this point. Foster, the original boneless duck, Aaron the asshole ranger, Big Bad Beard of the Mad, Eric McD, giant monsters on the horizon, Burleigh T, Percival Fredericks in Man Vussel, Kloewowski, DiRolo, the third, Christian A, J. Dragonborn, Joe Rowe, the inner propo. Liam D. The Sandrane, Ben A. Feldonis, John III, Dave H. Vivian, Koala Bear, Katherine S. David K. Christian S. Dustin S. Conner F. Hawkeye Pears, Book Vars Assistant Izzy F. The
Starting point is 01:40:40 Time Walker, Blair, the Bug Blair, Bar Blairian, Cat C.C.J. Pork Chop, Ariel M. Selena N.Valacy Raptor, Minnet the Magnificent Magic, Carp, Pat El, A Chuta A. Lauren H. Amber W. Joshua D. Ryan S. The Bone Duster, the charming fluff, Robert Chris Master, Brent Lee, Telekitty Creitty creations the official NAD pod in my personal favorite illustrator. Plopes, the awakened, Crick Horse Warlock has a rad packed with penta greens. Carly A. Addy-K, Laurie P. August from Dallas, Hard One wants your number. Whoa, okay. Spam gaming, the not-so-skilled gamer, Grant L. Conor S. Christopher J. Pebblepot giving Jake the free plug brother sister, beard oil and Halsian by all his stuff also Olaf dies
Starting point is 01:41:32 in Frozen. Wow. Wow, that was fun to read. Logan S. Leviathan, Bioquart 7, Amber Dexterous, Thrill of the Fright aka Ashley Sullivan H. Trubhop Dropper, Sydney T. Jack H.ill of the Fright AKA, Ashley Sullivan H, Trubh Hop, Dropper, Sydney T, Jack H, King of the Mole City, Under Iron Deep Shoutout, Matt Wise says shoutout to Abogunday, Athena Lamora, Ellie Garland, and Noble love your big bad DM. Hell yeah. Garble the Moist, Juicy Kiwi, Champ Wild, Vailen, Sprite Pepsi, Carlin Sea, Louis is your dad, Noah the Bagel of all things, Estelle, Loai, oh it's not L, it's an I, Eothiager. So I'm sure I pronounced it right now. Conflicted DM Justin, LB, Torrely, Skirmisher, Dandy, E&D, Bunnies, Bunny, Snicket is not named after Lemony Snicket, but would
Starting point is 01:42:25 be cool if he was. Marcos P. Pup Kalish learns the balance Druid Dakota J.P. Pagos, the self-proclaimed Faye Prince, Ketrin, the stat wizard, Tracy P. the Crick elf librarian, Friar, Frisid, Andy E. Holly Hyena, Anthony A. Leah C. Page H. May be an ice lizard who has been living in Calder's beard. Glad to have you. Kristen with a K. Dufinus, Cal, just Cal, Commodore Galaxy, Edison N. Russell H. A monk named Dilco, yes the whole thing, yes every time. Nio's the novice monster hunter.
Starting point is 01:43:04 My new best friend Simon was who's trapped in Dreamland, I met him as I slept and is loving hugs restored my HP and spell slots. Lora Lai, Frost, Morgan M, Sticker, Steven E, Mr. Adams, Meg the male carrier of Bahumia, James F. Jimmy A. Hi man, hi man, yeah, that's me. Capping capy, M4L, the dragon ambassador, Wayfarer, Andrew B. Dalton B. Copefresh, Barpo, Good Barrel, Bard Barian, a brewer, a meritis of water, deep.
Starting point is 01:43:40 Tari rhymes with Jabari, finally got it. Welshlander, Garrett G. One Big G1 big curd Eric and Mr. D Tommy K Nola John P Mr. Sillyhead Otho the chainbreaker monster captain Renee S. Cameran C Greg Land hopes dagger the only dagger of hope Daniel VH and Olivia K thank you all Daniel V.H. and Olivia Kay. Thank you all.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.