Not Another D&D Podcast - C3 Ep. 72: The High Queen (A Faerie Tale Ending)
Episode Date: December 23, 2024IT'S THE CAMPAIGN 3 FINALE!!! Duck Team and their allies battle Queen Jovyre! Sol interrupts a ritual, Callie duels a rival, and Calder enters a love triangle. Support us at Patreon.com/...Naddpod to get access to the after-show and a bunch of other Naddpod content!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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This is a HeadGum Podcast.
Welcome to the campaign after the campaign. This is not another D&D podcast.
Welcome back to Bohomia everybody.
Happy Hoglodays everyone. It's the season three finale. Or the
campaign three finale.
I believe you mean Hoglodays.
The Hoglodays. Did I not say Hoglodays?
You said Happy Holidays.
I said Hoglodays.
I heard Hoglodays. I said Hoglodays. Did I not say Hoglodays? You said Happy Holidays. I said Hoglodays. I heard Hoglodays.
I said Hoglodays.
Oh, shit.
Did I not hit the hog hard enough?
That's the problem.
Yeah, can you?
You want me to hit the hog harder in Hoglodays?
Yeah, there it is.
That's it, there it is.
I'm in the spirit now.
Happy Hoglodays, everybody.
Lather up your poles, hit the hog.
I'm here, high on the Hoglodays over here.
I'm here, Dungeon Master Brian Murphy, joined byays over here folks. I'm your dungeon master Brian Murphy
joined by Jake Hurwitz.
Making the monarchy frown by breaking the hell
out of the crown, call their kill day.
Oh yeah.
Yeah.
Jake, it's been a pleasure recording this show for you.
It's unfortunate you won't be returning
for campaign four and whatnot,
but we've had an awesome ride.
What the hell?
Is it because I didn't do a hog based rhyme?
I briefly thought about it.
Unfortunately, yeah. Oh shit, that's what we have to do?
We were kind of looking for that, yeah.
You do not get a hogliday bonus, unfortunately, either.
Yeah. I do want the bonus.
And then of course we've got Emily Axford.
I was gonna do a different one,
but now I'm gonna do a hog one.
Ready to snog a hogliday hog.
I am being petrified.
Perfect, and this is why we're keeping Emily around.
Really?
That quick improv.
I've got an alt, can I take mine again?
Yeah, we can try, we can try.
Okay.
Okay.
All right, fuck called her killed day,
we're playing as hog one sure hog.
Actually, let's cut that out, I have a different idea.
Jesus Christ.
Do you need a third?
Jesus.
Jesus lord. What you need a third? Jesus. Lord.
What the hell was that?
Yeah.
What?
What?
I think I have five questions.
Go ahead.
I'll take one at a time.
First off, why did you throw your character under the bus?
Secondly, why are you hard one short?
Why did you bring hard one into it?
Well, hog one, it was easier to do in my mind.
Yeah.
And then it was hard to say.
Third, I guess, when you said, can I take this again,
why didn't you wait like 10 more seconds
before you fully thought of it?
We edit the show.
We definitely edit the show.
That's fair.
That's only three questions.
You have two more? I have one. That's fair. That's only three questions. You have two more.
Yeah, fourth.
I have one.
I have one.
And what was with the choice to start
with your character's name?
That's not what we ever do.
Yeah.
I'm glad you asked, actually.
Yeah.
I thought it would be kind of interesting
to flip the whole script in the last episode.
I wanted to make the moment about me,
if that makes sense.
A question for me as well, did you consider
Hog One Squealfoot, maybe, just as a good name?
Wow.
Just as if you wanted to make a good one instead.
See, fifth question, how quickly can
Caldwell replace Jake very quickly?
Not super fast, because he needs to play his own character.
No, I'm ready.
I can double off.
He can do it.
I've been trained. I've been hitting the weights. And with that, let's go ahead and throw it to play his own character. No, I'm ready. I can double up. He can do it. I've been trained.
I've been hitting the weights.
And with that, let's go ahead and throw it to Kogel Tanner.
Born in a dome, not a bog, this guy loves his eggnog.
And also, happy hog.
La-days to all my friends.
It's Saul Buffau.
Wow.
He's just had friends and frogs.
Oh, yeah.
Missing the frog with the hog rhyme.
I feel like that.
But he already achieved everything beyond the first rhyme with extra credit. You're in the hog house right now
I think that's the worst thing anyone did you cannot talk to call it all that way
Alright
The man the man has two children. I'm actually still on paternity leave. Yeah
When I just have one right paternity leave Jake
You're what's wrong with this yeah, God damn dude all right?
Anyway, so what is this hot boy summer? What are you doing?
All right, let's we'll go ahead and give Caldwell a little reminder. Let's go ahead and do a little recap
So last time you battled the fate bringer mages and Charbin with the automatons allegiance up for grabs
Callie used invisibility to successfully aim the Arquebus and Restrain a Mage early on,
but the Fatebringers had some tricks of their own, systematically trapping each of you in
a maze spell.
Sahl was transported to a swamp, where an Automaladrin version of Queen Joveir urged
him to join forces with her to prepare for the danger to come.
She turned his attention to the sky, where an astral war was raging, one that will eventually
reach the shores of Bohemia.
Calder was brought to the frigid north, where he saw a future of death and devastation for
his people, but Jovir showed a victorious timeline with her leading a combined force
of material plane and Feywild forces.
Kali was brought to a flaming forest and warned that it was the Feywild's future if she wouldn't
join Jovir.
When Kali refused, Jovir revealed that Kali was not in an illusion, but the beast lands
where Oberon had been killed by a charmed Marigold, she watched in horror as the ancient
tree burned.
Using stunning strikes, the arquebus us and plain old concentration breaking, you are able to save each other from the maze spells.
During the fight, Kenna retrieved Bear Lane, who tackled Trashcan the Automaton.
Focusing on the mages, you were able to incapacitate the Fatebringers and turn the tides of battle against Charbin.
Once he saw that the fight couldn't be won, he promptly switched sides and killed the prone Fatebringers.
When you weren't buying his alliance and continued to beat him up,
Charbann begged to join your side and enthusiastically offered to drink piss.
Saul was able to stop Berylain from attacking Trashcan,
and she eventually understood that the automatons did not yet have autonomy.
With the battle won, the automatons pledged themselves to you, seeing you as the clearest
path to securing a fae crown, their final command.
You loaded up your ships, hopped on your serpents, and headed back to Garrosh's floating castle,
where the Green Knights and Mob Goblin were preparing for war.
Syrah is set to to die and Jovir is
ready to consolidate the powers of the crowns tomorrow.
And that's where we are now.
Okay.
So you know that Jovir plans on doing her ritual to make herself High Queen and kill
Saira at the next dawn.
It is night right now, late into the night.
So you can presume you'll
sleep a little bit into the day and then spend the whole day traveling tomorrow to get to
Jovier's domain in time before the sun rises.
So we can have a bit of a lay-in.
Yes, you guys have a little bit of a lay-in. Is there anything you guys want to do that
night? You see that your allies from the material plane have not arrived yet, but a lot of your
Feywild allies are here
You see Garrosh is just kind of looking out over the night sky off the edge of this cloud
You see that Balnor, Albin and some of the members of the Green Knights and Mob Goblin have like kind of gathered around
A little bonfire up here. Oh, oh, that's bonfire in the clouds. Yeah, what do you burn?
You see a garage turns around and goes, wood?
Oh, really?
It's not like magic fire.
I mean, I think they brought their own wood.
Wow!
You brought your own wood!
That knighthood is productive!
They've got, you see, G'raaj points to all of the airships that are docked up there?
Yes, there's barrels, there are various materials
that can fly, do you have anything on you
that isn't made of clouds?
We don't bring our own wood anywhere.
Kenna, why do we not bring our own wood?
I have some wood.
Yeah, you see, Kenna also goes,
I've got a few pieces of woods to like,
build a tent or something.
Yeah. Oh, okay.
Is it, I mean, yeah.
You caught me woodless.
Just cause we're in the cloud castle
doesn't mean everything here has to be made of clouds.
Okay, I'm learning.
I'm listening, I'm learning.
Yeah, you see Ma Goblin goes,
this gun is not made of clouds
and just pulls out like a Gatling gun that shoots off.
Whoa, be careful where you point that.
Sorry.
This wood thing feels like the weirdest thing anybody's said today.
I'm serious.
I don't know why we're stuck on it.
It seems pretty normal to be because we can walk on it.
We're wearing our normal clothes.
We're not wearing like cloud clothes.
Yeah, we're not wearing like cloud underwear, right?
No one else is wearing cloud underwear.
Do you have that?
What?
You see, Garage goes, well, of course I'm wearing cloud underwear. I would love wearing cloud underwear. Do you have that? What? You see, Garrosh goes, well, of course I'm wearing cloud underwear.
I would love some cloud underwear.
Well, I'll get you cloud underwear.
I'm not going into the battle without it now.
Garrosh summons a cloud and with a little wisp of wind makes you all cloud cups and
cloud underwear.
Oh my god, my genitals have never been so cradled.
Wow, I'm literally on cloud nine.
Sol leaps 100 feet in the air.
Yeah, you see Balnor walks over and goes,
you guys got, you guys passing out fresh,
Balnor, hit me in the nuts.
fresh, tidy whities over here.
Hit me in the nuts.
What?
Balnor goes, all right, and kicks you in the crotch.
I didn't even feel it.
This cloud.
It bounced right off.
Balnor puts on a pair of fresh cloud tidyy-whities real dad tighty-whities
I'm curious like what are the green nights talking about over there because I feel like you guys have gone into battle together
So many times and I'm curious what pre battle
Energies like with the green nights. Yeah. Well, I think Bobby's kind of speaking to the crew over there
I think Bobby's kinda speaking to the crew over there. Oftentimes we'll say, you know,
if we've got any family we might need taken care of
or kind of what our goals for the future are
so that our fellow members of the knighthood
might take on our cause.
Yeah.
Sort of a last wishes type thing.
Sort of like a articulating of the North Star.
Yeah, I think that's a good way to look at it.
Wow, I never thought about, like, who would carry on my wishes.
I'll carry on your wishes.
Really?
Yeah. What do you feel that you have unfinished that I can promise to quest for if the worst is to happen?
Well, I don't know. I mean, seeing the Feywild and all the other places in Bohemia,
I feel like I wanna just keep traveling,
keep meeting people, keep experiencing new things.
I mean, I feel like I've just left the dome really,
and there's so much more to see.
Then let's make sure nothing happens to you.
We can carry your lifeless body everywhere we go.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, you know what? Can someone whip us up a travel coffin?
That's a beautiful thing.
Frogs, we dehydrate really well.
Oh, you can just shove me in a jar.
You see, yeah, you see Kenna, tears in her eyes,
salute to goes, I will carry your frog coffin everywhere,
Mr. Buffau.
And what about for you, Kenna?
Me? Yeah, do you have something
there? If something... Now, you know what? Look me in the eye. Nothing's gonna happen to you.
Nothing's gonna happen to me. Nothing's gonna happen to you. I go before you do. Well, no,
not necessarily. A squire has a fire under her ass to protect her knight. Yeah, but a squire...
Yeah, I'm sorry I said the a word, but I'm not that
sorry. It's okay. Balanor didn't hear. Hey, language everybody. Yeah. Balanor kind of
gestures over to the fire, kind of takes you guys over to like the edge. You see Albin
standing there too, gives you guys a little nod. And you see Robert the young stag stands
up and addresses everyone and goes, the Green Knights will not lose tomorrow, because we cannot be killed.
We are the wild itself.
Destroying one will only inspire others, the seed of courage spread on the wind, ready
to bloom in a new generation.
If I should die tomorrow, take my mantle,
regroup, grow, fight again.
Woo!
Yeah, the night's all go like, hell yeah, man.
You see, a bunch of people were just like,
you know, look after my dogs.
Ah.
That's really important, actually.
I'm glad that you're getting that squared away.
This one green knight's standing next to you, sweating, goes like, it is, right? I didn't get shown up getting that squared away. This one green knight standing next to you sweating goes like,
it is right? I didn't get shown up by that, did I?
We will absolutely turn the back porch light off.
Yeah, thank you. Yeah, somebody's got to look after the dogs,
and I think I left the back porch light on.
I've got a dog sitter, but if I die, you know,
no one's going to relieve them.
We'll throw away the curdled milk so your refrigerator doesn't smell bad.
That's important. Appreciate that, appreciate that.
Well, I guess I want to know, Callie, Caller, what are your wishes for the future?
What can I carry on for you if worse comes to worse?
I think you've already made that promise.
I think that you two have already tied your lives to licorice and honeysuckle.
So that's it.
I mean, I guess if something happens to me, save my sister.
Okay, that's easy enough.
Yeah.
Well, it's extremely difficult, but I will do it for you.
That would be those are those are the things that are most important right now.
And you, Calder.
are most important right now and you, Calder. I feel like all I've ever wanted is to ride into battle
for something that mattered this much
next to two people I love.
So there's no purpose for me beyond this,
but if somebody could look after my dad's meat shed.
I will be returning there if I get out of this battle for sure.
Oh yeah.
I'll live in the meat shed, Mr. Pilladay.
Thank you, Jenna.
I think in general too, if we are successful and I don't make it and there's talking about what
the Feywild could be, I just, I really believe that this being a place of change
that can humble people,
and that's not a bad thing, that's what it's always been,
and there's places that aren't like that.
So I think keeping it like that
might be a value to the entire multiverse.
We'll keep it wild for you.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And Alvin, Calder wanted to know what
your wish is for the future.
Oh.
Who?
Well, that's really kind of you, Calder,
especially after the way you've acted
this past entire time I've known you.
I got to take a leak, everybody.
Welcome with you.
Yeah. You see, Albin kind of looks off and does look kind of serious and goes,
Well, um, I don't know if I'd ever have the means to do it, but I think it'd be interesting to try to found another school or magic university.
I mean, Gladehome's gone now.
That was sort of the foremost one.
And Launchpad was another appendage
on the long arm of mothership.
And you know, most of those adventures
ended up being total lies,
including the bathroom of Whispers, which just felt so real, so it felt so real.
Well, the bathroom was real.
Yes, that it was like,
rejecting Pepper's ghost. The Whispers were fake.
They were actors.
Yes.
Actors coming in.
I think so, yes.
That seems illegal.
Well, I think it was a,
I don't think there were actors in there watching us.
I think that there was like a something playing, so it looked like there were banshees in there. Yeah, so have you ever been on the Haunted Mansion at Disneyland?
Yeah, I know I have, yeah.
It was like you'd go in there like once a week and there would be like a new quest that get whispered to you
And you think like wow I'm the only one that's getting these quests, but like no
It's just a pre-recorded message. Then there'd be other people at the quest there too. Yeah.
And it's just like, how did you find out about this?
And we were like, how did you? Other boy wizard?
An owl pal? Who are you guys?
And it would just be other people.
So, Albie's Academy will have like an actual haunted bathroom.
Oh wow, Albie's Academy. Interesting.
Oh!
Yeah, I don't know that it would have any kind of haunted bathroom necessarily.
We promise you, we make this solid, pal. Okay, you don't need to make-
We will get you your haunted bathroom.
You don't need to name it after me.
An authentically haunted bathroom.
You don't need to haunt a bathroom.
One in which the ghosts are totally-
You'll be.
All right.
Perfect, from the Rolodex to the haunted bathroom,
you've evolved so much.
Yes, oh that's true.
Okay, you know what?
I'm on board for haunted bathroom.
We put haunted bathroom in there. I would concede that you know I mean in all seriousness
You know it ended up being a lot of projections and stuff
But there were a lot of things that were that were very real
and he looks at you Saul and he goes a
Friendship the friendship we made with the you you know, fellow students, those were...
Those were good times, and I would like for other
kids like us to have somewhere to go.
Yeah. I mean, speaking of the wild, your friendship was the seed that grew all of this, Albin.
Without you, I would have been totally lost.
So...
Whatever you decide, I'll be there with you if you need
someone to teach the dumber kids who aren't good at magic how to punch
less flexible kids who are the more flexible kids wow you're already
already speaking like an educator you see he pulls you in close and he goes
like Saul there will always be a place for dumb kids
that don't know how to do magic.
And he gives you a huge hug.
And also smart kids who are bad at literally everything else.
That's it, that's it.
And you see, Kenna goes, I guess like,
so here's the thing about the journey to knighthood,
and I guess you guys probably know it,
is like, all this time I've like wanted to be a knight,
but I'm kind of afraid of what comes after this
because like, are we, I don't know, maybe this is dumb. No, this is stupid, I don't know maybe this is dumb no this is stupid I don't care
no it's okay I was just okay I was just wondering if when I'm not your squire if you think we'll
all if we'll be friends.
Kenna my dream is that you and I fight side by side as knights and Calder is our squire.
Oh my god that is my dream too.
Wait a second.
I want to redo my dream.
That's perfect Ms. Petrified.
Can I be like the little drummer boy?
Don't lean into it.
Saul I thought you were teaching the dumb kids.
What happened?
Well like for one semester and I'm off.
You'll be like an adjunct. He's teaching the dumb kids, what happened? Yeah, well like for one semester and I'm off! Yeah, he needs an ample amount of sabbaticals
to adventure with us
Yeah, and you see um
Balinor goes
Yeah, I'm probably uh
I think I'll probably hang it up after this
I'm getting up there in years and uh
You know, I don't want to slow Bobby down
Maybe I'll become, you know
a trainer or something,
train the new recruits.
You really should, that's a good use of your time.
Thanks.
Alby's Academy could really use you.
Oh, right.
Maybe you could scare kids in the bathroom or something.
No, of course, we're gonna get authentically haunted.
Stop already going to Trish.
The whole kind of school you're trying to run here.
It wasn't my idea. It's Albin's school.
You see, Balnor looks at Albin really intensely and goes,
I don't want any part of your school.
And Albin goes, I don't know what they're talking about.
I literally don't know what they're talking about.
I frantically mouth go with it to Albin, so I don't lose faith.
Is it Albin's mouth thing?
No, no.
Yeah, is there, I guess is there anything else
you guys wanna do that night?
I wanna take my displacer scarf
and I want to shred it and unravel it.
And then I wanna use the threads
to patch up everyone's jumpsuits.
Whoa.
Okay, so kind of spread the magic around.
Yeah, if that's possible.
Interesting, hell yes.
Very interesting.
Okay, why don't we do this?
Saul, go ahead and give me a,
we'll do it as if it's like one of your key attacks
or something, maybe like a wisdom saving throw.
This is just like your proficiency plus your wisdom essentially to kind of try to spread
the magic out as you patch your scarf.
You like kind of quilt it on everybody's cloaks here as you guys get ready for battle.
Would you let me give a bardic?
I would.
Since he's practicing a craft.
Hell yeah.
Is it D?
Actually my mom used to knit.
Really?
Have you tried this stitch?
Whoa.
It's completely magical.
A floating needle that goes through
and just flips on its own.
Because of my new monk ability Diamond Soul,
my wisdom is a plus 10.
Oh yeah, everybody is leveled up.
That's awesome.
Ooh. Yeah.
Boom.
You see a little diamond thimble appears on my thumb.
I got a one on my bardic that is a 19.
19, okay.
So you take your time and you go around
and you patch it on like the crew,
you patch it on like Kenna, Kali,
Oh, I think for Kenna, for Kenna,
I think I make a little handkerchief that she can give to Akriyana
after battle.
Oh, that's what knights do, right?
Yeah.
Yeah, I guess that theoretically could...
Oh my God.
They might.
You seem to get so nervous.
They might usually give it before battle.
Oh.
To like, remember them.
But I'll give it after.
But this is actually really bad.
Wait, okay, I have a last wish. Okay. Yeah. All
right. If I die, and I die like a dumb way, like I just get
knocked off the serpent and my corpse like falls in the water.
Wow. Okay. Make it not that. Say that I was one v oneing Jovier.
Okay. And then give her you give her this handkerchief. Right.
Okay. And I will write you. And you say, she lived like a night,
she died like a night.
Mm-hmm.
Think about her and say cool stuff to the air.
Yeah, I'll do for you what I did for Hard One,
and I'll write a whole balance.
Perfect, okay.
Yeah.
Wait, that wasn't true?
The giant fucker stuff?
I bought that.
I think it was the giant lair.
You see Balinor leans in, you guys go, you guys talking about the giant lair?
We've heard that song recently made it out to us.
Really?
We're making the rounds on the radio out here.
Wow.
Top 40.
Okay, that's great.
That's great.
We're spreading the word.
Huge.
No way.
You should be getting residuals for that.
So yeah, Saul, you take the time, you patch up everybody's cloaks and stuff, and add the
Displacer Scarf, and here's how I will say that will work.
Saul, as a free action on your turn, you can apply the magic to anyone for the round who
has a patch.
So you can be like, if Kali's really getting beat up, you can be like, okay, I'm going
to apply it to Callie
this round or move it to Calder.
That's a really fun response for this, man.
Thanks.
On your feet, you come up with this.
Thank you.
That's really good.
Okay, Diana.
Full disclosure, Caldwell did text me about this,
but then I forgot about it.
So I am both a good and a bad DM,
because I did think of it on my feet,
because I didn't think of it outside.
Subconsciously in your dream you were thinking about it.
Well that's kind of perfect.
Caldwell's a good player, you're a good DM.
There you go, there you go.
And that's why I'm getting Jake's spot.
Can't wait.
But I'm the one that noticed.
Is there anything else you guys wanna do
before you get your long rest before the battle tomorrow?
Yeah, so I think I'm gonna look down at the, like, my mom's winter crest on my sword.
Yeah.
And I'm, like, thinking of this oath that I made to redeem her, and how that's kind of null now.
And part of me is like, okay, well, she can't be redeemed. She could be avenged.
And that's, like, an exciting idea for like a second.
But then I'm like, no,
but I just faced off with Jovier
and I feel like I've had a year's worth of anger
in one interaction.
And I think that's not the place I want to live.
So I'm like looking around
and I'm seeing these serpents
and I'm seeing Calder and Sol
and myself and the way that we've kind of like braided our lives with these
serpents and even with each other and I don't know if the serpent queen is still
alive but I want to like reiterate my devotion to her and her children.
So I'm gonna become an oath of devotion paladin.
Whoa!
Thank you.
Sick oath.
Yeah, it's not really that different, but
Yeah!
Just seemed fun like now that
Yeah!
redeeming my mothers off the table.
Kali, as you're kind of like reaching out
to the serpent queen and you kind of don't know of her fate, go ahead and give me, you can kind of like reaching out to the Serpent Queen and you kind of don't know of her fate
Go ahead and give me you can do essentially like as if you're casting a spell attack You can do like charisma or wisdom plus your proficiency
19
you
make that decision to become a
Paladin of devotion you are
Devoted to this cause of the wild,
even if you get nothing in return.
I'm reaching out to that serpent queen and I'm like,
I don't know if you can hear this,
but I'm thinking about what might animate my sword
and I feel that hate and revenge make me feel so myopic
and I don't want a conquest, I want a North Star. As you
say that you look down at your sword you look down at your luck blade and you see
that normally when you do a smite or something there's like this big burst of
starfire and you look at it at first and you're like oh no have I lost my power
or is the Serpent Queen dead?
Because it it looks very much the same, but then you notice like a very
subtle
Glow looks like it's coming off the moon. Like it's just reflecting
Moonlight and you see the moon hanging high in the sky and
Then you see there is a star that is glittering just a bit brighter than the others.
It seems like other ones around them start to dim.
And you can just see a far off constellation of a serpent.
And you see your sword alights and you get this inherent feeling that the Serpent Queen
is alive.
Oh, yes.
You just can't get to her right now, but she is out there and she is watching over you.
Okay, that's very good. I kiss my sword.
You kiss your sword.
Calli, did you just kiss your sword?
Yeah, with tongue, Calder. What of it? What of itder Calder starts licking a sword like a popsicle
does anyone have bandages i know so we're all just licking our swords
i see bounder goes what are you doing over there bud albin told me i should
lick the sword before battle albin told you god that guy's a freak
yeah you see what he says about you behind your back. Haunted bathrooms?
He's talking shit about me?
You see Balnor's been drinking?
Really?
Yeah, he says you're built like a soup can.
Really?
See, Balnor gets all indignant and walks over.
You see, Albin is just having a nice conversation with someone.
Balnor goes over and pushes him and you just see they start to get into a tussle and you
see a bunch of green knights and Mob Goblins start to get into it. Seele, and you see a bunch of green knights and mob goblins start to get into it.
See mob goblin goes in to defend Albin.
You see the young stag runs in,
they all just start wrestling each other.
Okay, save it for tomorrow.
Save it for tomorrow.
That was fun.
Calder, is there anything you'd like to do
before you go to bed?
I feel like, you know, my people have been saved.
I feel really good going into this battle,
but is there anybody that doesn't have a magic weapon?
Cause I can cast magic weapon
and give somebody like a plus one sword.
Oh, my weapon is magic, but what about Kanna?
Yeah. Oh wow, Kanna.
You know, if we are thinking about it, I think that maybe, Calder, do you want to just officially
knight Kenna?
Whoa.
Because I've got a spell we can make it real official like.
But is she waiting to be knighted by General Bronzebeard?
Well, is there anything between Squire and Knight?
There's got to be like an intermediary rank. Hey, hey Green Knights, what's the intermediary rank between Squire and Knight? Or there's gotta be like an intermediary rank. Hey, hey Green Knights! What's the intermediary rank between Squire and Knight?
Squite?
We want to give our girl a promotion, but we don't want to take away-
Probably be a Squite, I would say.
Squite.
A Squite.
A Squite.
Let's do Squite.
It'd be sort of, you know, if you're- think about it like an Eagle Scout project, it's
like you're almost there, you gotta just do the one last thing.
Yeah, okay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Alright, should we squite thee?
Yeah, let's squite.
You're talking,
we talking about a squite promotion right now?
Kenner, we've been talking
and we think that you're ready to be a squite.
Right.
And you don't have to kneel to be squited,
you just have to kind of squat a little lower.
Yeah, you squat to squite.
I can squat to squite?
Yeah.
You see, tears are coming down her cheeks
I I dreamed of the day that I would become a knight, but I didn't think I would
Necessarily be acknowledged for my squireliness to become a squite. It's rare
It's rare
It's rare
Yeah, she's squatting
Not quite a knight. You are now a squite.
And I'm feeling ensquired by you.
I'll call shard up.
I'll rinse it off from being licked.
And I'll use the broadside.
I'll just do one shoulder, a half night.
I squite thee.
And I'll play a bit of ambient music
to cast coming of age.
Whoa!
So for the next 24 hours,
whenever she makes an ability check,
she can roll a D4 and add it.
Whoa, sick!
It's just ability checks.
Yeah.
Oh yeah, I'm gonna say this isn't even that magical.
It's just, Kenna is legitimately so inspired by becoming a squite.
I promise you won't be disappointed in this.
I'll be the finest squite that ever squited.
It feels right to have a squite.
It feels right to be a squite.
And to all a good squite.
It's a good night to be a squite.
I want my squite! A squite. It's a good night to be a squite. I love my squite!
A squite has never had finer nights.
She jumps in and gives you guys a big hug.
All right.
Well, as we're all getting ready for bed,
I'm gonna ask everyone to do one last kind of dream
embrace with me to try and reach out to
swag. Yeah that'd be great. Right on. Yeah you guys all get in a little circle you
guys hold hands and Saul go ahead and give me a wisdom saving throw. Okay. Oh
yeah that's gonna be a 26. Sick. There we go. Saul, Saul, you had, I believe, two out of the three spores filled in the vial.
So you fill another one and that would typically be enough for divination.
And as you go into your meditation, you feel like you were doing it correctly.
You feel connected.
You feel this elevated sense of self and your connection to the universe.
But much like Kali, when she just tried to reach out to the serpent queen,
you don't feel quite like you can get to him right now.
There is this sort of far off-ness, and you realize that swag,
his domain is kind of the Beastlands.
Like, that's where you go to him.
You get the sense that he is out there. And in fact, you unfocus your eyes and just take in
the sky around you. And you see all these stars. And you don't see the like classic galactic swag
who like can move around and everything
But kind of like Halley with the serpent Queen you see these far-off stars
Glittering a little bit brighter that seem to form
swag
Would you like to ask him a question or would you like to say anything?
I think I just say thanks
I think I'd just say thanks. I think that I've learned enough to know that knowing the future isn't always helpful,
and that I've got everyone here I need to make that future come to pass.
So maybe the only question I ask is, can we sleep here tonight?
The stars glitter in a way that they there almost looks like a little nod.
But to your point before about having everything you need to make the future
the way you'd like to see it.
As you say that you see the spores in your vial glitter and take on...
It almost becomes like a strange potion.
Like it looks like you have a little galaxy in your vial.
Whoa.
And you don't get the sense that this is something
that you should open now,
but it's something that you should open in the future.
Okay.
Emergencies only, got it.
Wow.
Turn-down service is impressive here.
I'll say what I said before. Thank you for everything.
It was nice getting to know you and it's nice continuing to know you and
I'll see you again one day.
You feel a warmth coming from the Vile.
I'll have a lot of questions about how to teach children because I'm not good at it.
I don't think you're allowed to call them dumb.
Number one, you see the glittering stars, not all the best teachers break the rules.
Comforted by that fact.
Uh, I think I, um, make a little bed on tell you what, it's too damn comfortable. Yeah, I'm keeping these cloud head days.
I'm not changing to borrow.
I'm taking my cloud cup off, but to use it as a pillow.
Wow.
An absolutely perfect pillow.
I fluff up my cup.
You guys fluff your cups and go to bed.
I'm going to sleep.
I'm going to sleep.
I'm going to sleep.
I'm going to sleep.
I'm going to sleep.
I'm going to sleep.
I'm going to sleep.
I'm going to sleep.
I'm going to sleep.
I'm going to sleep.
I'm going to sleep.
I'm going to sleep. I'm going to sleep. I'm going to sleep. I'm going to pillow. I'll fluff up my cups.
You guys fluff your cups and go to bed.
And the next day, you guys sleep in a little bit to get your long rest and also...
Yeah, let's not set an alarm, okay?
No one set an alarm.
We all have to agree because if one of us sets an alarm, we're all going to get up.
Yeah, we'll wake up at a normal time, I'm sure.
Well, here are some commotion for sure.
Yeah, you guys wake up and you see that you needed the morning anyway for the airships and stuff to be loaded up.
You see that there are a few dozens of them. You see Green Knights, Mob Goblin, Automatons, Fire Elementals.
As everybody's loading up, getting ready to go, you see H honeysuckle and licorice are there on the edge of this cloud
You see ma goblin approaches you guys and holds out like small earpieces and goes
I'm
Outfitting all the commanders of the different legions with
Communication devices so land the air or sea whatever front you should be able to hear each other wow
Whoa, thank you ma you are really really talented land, air or sea, whatever front you should be able to hear each other. Wow.
Thank you, Marr.
You are really, really talented.
She gives you a little wink and then goes and walks over and begins outfitting Robert
the Young Stag and Garrosh as well.
And I think as you guys look out, you might see how far you've come.
You are commanders of this army. You see all these seasoned Knights and everybody loading up airships
And there was a time not too long ago when you were d-class Knights that were wondering if you'd ever get to ride on an airship
Wow, I know I'm cold all the time, but I have the chills
Come a long way from Sky Days
Yeah, we really have. I still have that
gift card. Really? Has it expired? I have to believe it hasn't because I need to have
something to fight for. You know what? You're right. That's your North Star. Let's say this.
If any of us die, the other ones have to use the gift card.
Yeah, within a month.
Within a month.
Right.
The other ones all go to TGI Sky Days and use the gift card.
Right.
And they have to get absolutely plastered remembering them.
And we have to lie and say it's someone's birthday.
Even though we have a gift card.
And we have to order every single appetizer.
Yeah, even the bad ones.
Yeah, how do you guys want it? So you guys have obviously four of you that are in like your main
party. You see Balnor and the other allies get on airships and whatnot. You see Albin comes over,
gives Saul a big hug, gives Callie a hug, brushes past Calder.
Oh my God, what if I die?
hug, brushes past Calder.
Oh my God, what if I die?
Albin gives you a cold limp handshake.
That's more like it.
And then gets onto an airship with a mob goblin.
How would you guys like to set yourselves up on honeysuckle and licorice? You've got this great silver serpent and this great bronze serpent.
So there's like a coronation slash execution happening.
Yeah, yeah.
Correct execution.
It's honestly like messy messaging.
Yeah.
The optics are questionable.
She's trying to do it all.
I just can't.
She is.
Well, it's kind of like spill the blood of our enemies,
see the might of the empire.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, I get it.
I get it.
Did someone say Empire?
Jarvan comes over with a frothy mug and goes,
Shall we have a drink before we really commit it?
Jarvan, were we gonna send you into,
oh no, we would be sending you to your death
if we sent you, right, never mind.
Keep that cup away from me.
It's the only cup I don't wanna be near.
He nods and goes, and how?
And then takes a sip of piss and then walks away.
Wow.
So near the brim.
God, it was frothy.
He's leaning in.
I thought he'd forget about the bib.
Is that a new thing that he does?
I think he is.
But he's so frothy.
I'm like, are you peeing from a ladder?
I think if he's drinking piss, he's just pissing piss.
And that's why it's so frothy.
Does he shake it up? Sorry, are you pissing from? Like, is that how you're getting it so frothy?
Yeah, it's like a head of Guinness on that thing.
Charbon just shakes his head and goes, that's my secret.
You know what, I'm gonna let you keep that. I am, actually.
We've all got our North Stars.
He looks somberly, gets onto a ship and takes off.
How do you guys want to spread out on honeysuckle and licorice?
You see Foster is there as well.
Oh yes, Foster.
Yeah, I'm going to scoop Foster under my arm and then I think whichever one seems like
it has space for me.
Both of them are huge.
Yeah.
Which one will give you the best chance to get close to Marigold, do you think?
Licorice is the fastest.
Then I think I'm gonna go on licorice.
I feel like the sooner we can maybe hopefully appeal to Marigold, I mean look maybe this
will mean that we just go in there and we get shot out of the sky and it was a bad idea,
but it almost feels like if we have a chance to tug at that string and bring it to our
side that seems like a priority to me. Any other thoughts on that?
No, I think having you super fast, super mobile. Yeah.
Seems like the best bet.
Would you feel comfortable with that soul? Like making a beeline for Marigold?
I think we beeline and then use what Honeysuckle does best,
having burrow and do the surprise attack maybe. You're right.
I love that idea.
And then he burrows underneath, try to get like a little bit of surprise on him. That is such, I love that idea. Like we fly in dead ahead and then he burrows underneath.
Try to get like a little bit of surprise on him, right?
That is such a good idea, yeah, let's do that.
A little om nom nom.
Yeah, a little om nom nom.
That's really good, yeah, cause then we'll,
cause I was thinking we should be separate
and that's a perfect way to do it.
Okay, great, sweet.
Yeah, you see, um,
Kenna hops on back of honeysuckle with Calder,
Callie hops on back of licorice with Saul,
and you all take off as Garrosh summons a mighty wind
and lets out a mighty gust of air.
You are propelled west towards the Winter Court.
All right.
I guess we'll know if Garrosh dies
because our cups will vanish.
Oh my God. Is that true?
Just perish the thought.
Protect him at all costs.
I whisper to everyone in the headpiece.
Right on, commander.
We should probably keep him alive
because he's controlling the wind
and making it so we get there on time,
but also the other way.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, a lot of reasons.
That too, that too.
You guys fly over the landscape,
the domain of summer and spring.
You are low enough in the air that you can see your ground and sea troops below.
You are following along the southern coast of the continent.
So you see boats of Charbans forces, these fire elementals, along with boats of automatons.
Some of them have transformed into vessels themselves so that they can carry the smaller
ones. Beep beep beep beep boop boop boop.
Whoa.
Oh my goodness, that's cute.
They're just chugging along down there, still like blowing on the wind so they're going
as fast as the airships.
As you reach the center of the continent where you begin to get into Jovier's domain,
you find yourself in a similar location to the Iron Deep Mountains on the Materio
Plane. But here in the Feywild, the continent is bisected in the middle and water divides
the two kingdoms. You can still see the peaks of mountains, but they look like rocky islands
sticking out of the water. In order to secure her domain, over the years, Juvir has literally
cracked the land and separated it from the summer side.
And on the sea here, you meet up with some friends. You see a force of merfolk join your numbers in the ocean
with the glorious wave mother, Acorala, leading them.
She is this giant proto old guppy
floating on top of the water.
Rah!
Come to me, my allies!
You see she summons more waves
and on them you see more allies.
You see Laslo the dragon turtle.
Yay!
Show's up.
Yes!
With stone commander Basalt Von Shale on his back.
Behind Laslo are rolling boulders
that glide along the surface of the water.
These appear to be clusters of earth elementals. You see Basalt gives you a nod and kind of
points their finger up at you guys. You also see riding a bunch of jumbo shrimp are a squad
of crustacean knights.
Holy shit, the Brine Splooges.
God, what I wouldn't give to be part
of that story you see you do see sir Brian splooge among them but you see that
there is one lone shrimp night taller and more gallant than the rest pulls the
steers on the jumbo shrimp that he's riding and removes his helm oh you see
long blonde hair and a handsome Squidward face
He's older struggles for a camcorder. I have to get this it's big day. He's almost
Unrecognizable until you hear him shout out over the water
Dive down I gotta kiss his cheek!
Nom nom nom!
You are a miracle!
Yeah!
He quite literally is!
He's like a week old!
He looks fully like a 27-year-old man!
Just handsome Squidward with-
Old Guppy did not have long blonde hair!
He has luxurious, Prince Charming blonde hair with a perfect middle part.
I'm so damn proud of you.
You've grown so much.
You guys fly down to greet Gunk.
You see Sir Brian Splooch is down there with a bunch of other crustacean knights and goes,
Yes, we are the knights of the Prawn Table.
We've had countless adventures of legend on the sea.
So Gunk the Gallant is perhaps the greatest of us all,
but we each have a story.
Pitch for campaign four,
we play Knights of the Prawn Table.
Please, can we?
Yes, please.
Yes, please.
Yes, perhaps.
Perhaps those stories for another time.
Keep it shrimp-al, you know?
Yeah, you see a bunch of like mollusk and crustacean night, like a giant lobster dude is there.
Wow, where have you been in the last few days?
Going to see who mom and dad is.
I pinch his cheeks. I kiss him on the mouth.
They say it happens so fast, but this feels crazy.
I know. I fret over him. I worry over every wrinkle.
Well, if anything happens in battle, I've lived a long and fruitful life.
No.
So mature.
If anyone's making it out of here, it's you, Gunk.
Yes, I hope so.
If anything happens to you, I am burning this world to the ground.
I just hope we finish this fight before I die of old age.
Sorry, when is that going to happen?
Like, calculation wise?
You see, surprise food shop...
If you look like you're 27 now...
...hurts his jumbo shrimp forward.
The lives of the Prawn Table are short, but we burn with a fiery passion.
Yeah, not this one.
OK, well, all of you...
Yes.
...are bound to protect him.
Well, of course, we are all bound...
We are all bound by our spirit of adventure and the many adventures we have had together.
Many adventures.
And we're going to learn about them in campaign four.
Which we don't know what that means.
I have no idea what you're speaking of.
A thousand episode campaign.
You see Gung joins the other knights of the Prawn Table as they ride off joining Akorilil in battle.
God, you think your love can only be so big and then it grows even larger.
I know, it's crazy seeing your own heart ripped out of your skin walking around.
With a beautiful, beautiful blonde hair in the middle part.
He's got swag's hair, isn't that weird?
Do we have to destroy the crown?
Like, could we just give the crown to Gung?
Go be with Gong.
You see, um, Acorlo holds her staff up and goes,
I sense more allies on the water.
You see, she holds her staff up.
I have wiped the tears out of my eyes.
I, uh, slap myself across the face really hard to shake my feelings.
You see, she brings in a huge wave
and on it comes more ships.
You see Ursea and the Elves of Sunere.
Woo!
Yeah, we've been calling you.
Yeah, I know, that's why I'm here.
Amazing vibes.
Wow.
If you're up just at the right time.
Yeah, the vibes are up right now.
I think they might dip down,
but I'm hoping they come back up at the end.
Me too, me too.
That's always the goal.
Ride the vibes. It's so posse. That's always the goal. Ride the vibe.
It's so posy.
It's a roller coaster.
It wouldn't be a ride if there weren't ups and downs.
But you see dwarves of Iron Deep
in metal submarines and sailboats.
Yes.
You see on the deck of one,
Jaina Bronzebeard proudly wearing her armor
with a cloak flapping in the wind.
Squite, Jaina, look.
Jaina, Jaina!
We lost your squire, we traded her for a squite!
Kenna stands proudly, and you see Jaina Bronzebeard.
She squats proudly.
Yeah, she's sorry, she squats proudly.
You see Jaina Bronzebeard goes,
a squite, that's quite interesting!
I suppose that would mean she's up for knighthood.
I will have to track her progress in the battle to come.
And you see, she puts her finger on her chin, and she kind of smiles,
and gives you guys a friendly nod, and looks up at Kenna.
You see Kenna freezes up and just stares forward, and she goes,
Oh my god, how's my armor look? Does my armor look good? It's gleaming.
Do I look great?
It's gleaming.
It looks gleaming.
Okay.
Don't squid on us now.
Absolutely gleaming.
And a little bit later as you travel,
you see some giant long ships join the fray.
And on them you see frost giant rangers of the Ice Knife.
You hear a voice call out to the sky.
Giants have arrived to save the small folk again.
Smaller kill day cry
liapy Petrasaur and small
bouffard. What is up, fools?
Honey suckle, honey suckle, shit
on that boat.
Drop a deuce on that boat.
This is a giant long ship.
You think this thing hasn't seen
mammoth shit before?
I salute my brother.
He gives you a like knowing nod and a salute
that kind of turns to, he looks very much like
he was like joking out of being scared a little bit.
You see he takes on like a grim look
as soon as he looks away from you guys
as he just wades into the water
with all of the other giants about to go to war.
Wow.
And as you guys make your way across the sea,
day gives way to night and you see glittering stars.
And amongst the glittering stars,
eventually you see glittering yellow reflective eyes
flying at you as tiny shapes on the horizon get bigger
and bigger and bigger until you are beset by dragons.
Multi-colored dragons of the living wood
with elven rangers on their back, red dragons,
blue, green, black, and of course a white dragon.
You see Princess Shiverblade rides up next to you guys.
I heard there was some chick here calling herself the queen.
Yeah, yeah, you're gonna need to eat her.
Yeah, I fucking think I will.
I'm feeling a little peckish.
She's trying to do a usurp.
Yeah, remember when I 1v1'd the king?
I might have to do that again.
I think you should.
I think you should.
Yeah.
Jenna, that's who knighted me.
I mean, technically, Golda, you're kind of knighted by the Serpent Queen now if you want to switch.
You never forget you're first.
Baby, she just squaded you.
You might be right about that, Squite.
You see, yeah, Princess Shiverblight flies up next to Honeysuckle, gives you a nod.
Solder?
Is that me?
Yes.
Of course that's you, that's your name.
I clumsily salute, drop my sword.
Salute with all your fingers.
You don't salute you kneel now because I'm the high queen.
Right, I fall down to both my knees.
That's better, very good.
Sugar Blight, who gave me this quite?
Yeah, okay everybody keep going west, everyone keep going west.
God, I always blow it. It's quite yeah, okay everybody keep going west everyone keep going west
Always blow it you see big Bev and
Elzor and igneous right up next to you guys big Bev goes I see you still know how to handle a dragon's ego, huh?
Yeah, kind of I'm kind of looking at what she's become. How is the living one doing? Oh, it's fine We just don't listen to her great. She just got like a cool castle
Yeah, it's just kind of it's like we don't have a queen. It's pretty
Yeah, she keeps the high king durotars younger brothers kind of at bay
Yeah, fighting each other. Oh, yeah, it's been pretty good
At the creek thank you for coming here to fight. Well, we owe you a favor, but not only that
I'm kind of selfishly hoping to get these teeth
on old Sawyer there.
And you see he clamps his teeth together.
Oh yeah, I'm gonna need you to eat, Blank.
Oh yeah, I will for sure do that.
Yeah.
Everyone just, yeah, feel free to eat whoever you want.
Had some appetizers, was able to find the old folks
who betrayed us way back when.
Really?
Was able to hunt a bunch of them down.
Wow, you had a gun, Sawyer.
Wow, you had a gun, Sawyer.
Sawyer got away, yeah.
I was gonna say, I feel like I see spectacles
in your tooth right there.
Yeah, I like to keep them there to remember.
You see, yeah, Mima is on Big Bev's back,
gives you guys a little nod and a wave.
See, Elzor and Igneous are there.
Elzor, hey guys, I got you something, Sol.
Whoa, what?
Pulls out, you are gonna get them hats.
You see Elzor and Igneous pull out visors
and throw them to you guys.
Oh!
Wow!
This is great, I did get you hats.
I got you these Deckwizard hats from Sunere.
Whoa!
Yeah, they're like hats from like
your underwater cousins in Sunere.
You see Elzor comes over, gives you guys a hug
on dragon back.
Igneous, this deep dragon that has its own like cyclops looking visor, takes the hats,
puts them on, and you see Elzor swings their chains around.
They've got like chains that they attack with as they join the other dragons.
Looks like Igneous and Elzor are leading Shroomrot's old contingency of the
deep elves who live outside the caves. There are a bunch of deep dragons and Wyrmlings with them.
You see the dragons are flying in packs with adult dragons leading the way scattered amongst
the airships. You see that it looks like Big Bev is kind of leading the way, but is pretending
like Shiverplate is leading the way to satiate her ego. Like she'll be riding in a certain way
and Big Bad will be like,
yeah, maybe like this though.
The biggest figurehead I've ever seen.
So you guys now have this giant caravan
of all of your allies in the sea, in the air.
Feeling strong.
Yeah.
And as you get closer to the shores of the Winter Court,
you suddenly see a flash
Goes up in the night sky. It looks like a great rift like the northern lights, but it glows red a
shooting streak of crimson in the sky that then spreads out
revealing a
projection to the entire planet as
You look up you can see Queen Jovir. She is
in her fearsome elder fae form. This twisted crown, long hair of thorns, claw-like
fingers, giant frame, and she addresses the realm. But I can protect you.
Together we are stronger."
You see, the image zooms out and you can now see Castle Winter, this fortress of crooked
spires and tall walls with cruel mounted weapons, dozens of airships and wyverns dot the sky,
thousands of knights on the ground.
You see floating orbs in the air circling around her, in which you see images of crowds
of bloodthirsty people shouting and chanting for Jovir.
These are, it looks like a two-way projection, projecting out to the common folk and letting
them attend the coronation without being on the battlefield
You see her ground troops are down by the rocky shores
Where the water hits the land giant Fomorians a ladran Knights with arcane bows
They're protecting the fortress below in the air high above are
Dracoliches and wyverns, and in between them, atop of a mountain,
is a place called the Altar of Stars.
This is where Queen Jovir makes her decrees.
Kali, you have seen this before.
Tall spires and plinths around her alight with power, runes of astral imagery, like
moons and suns and stars.
She is flanked by two Fomorian priests in dark robes and she projects out to the realm.
We will bring justice to all of the outsiders.
But first, the one who sparked this chaos. She gestures down to a lower part of the mountain,
halfway between Jovir and the fortress.
There was a giant cave mouth that opens up to a circular platform.
And in the middle of the platform is a pit.
Callie, you have seen this pit before.
Yeah. Those sentenced to die are struck by an executioner, then dropped
into a pit the length of this enormous mountain, their bodies lost to the Fae Dark underneath,
likely consumed by some monster. You see, the projection lowers from Jolvier and goes down to
the platform. Syra is bound and brought out by Wintercourt Knights.
You see behind her is an executioner, this enormous Fomorian with muscles that jut out
unnaturally from his frame.
He wields a giant hammer and has a fearsome mask.
A circle of knights and a fellow Fomorian block the
cavernous exit. And Jovir continues.
Sire Igni, you tried to divide us, to lead the people of this realm astray, but we are united in justice! You killed my sister.
You brought chaos and ruin to the Seelie Court.
What do you have to say to the charges against you, Queen Slayer?"
You see Syrah, her hair extinguished, just flat and red.
She's bound, she looks like she's been up
for several days mechanically.
It looks like she has like five levels of exhaustion.
Just nothing there.
She looks up with glazed eyes
and just with all of the rebellion she can summon.
You see a little spark, you see her hair goes up
for a moment like a bon, and she just goes,
You. You did this.
Her hair flops back down, and she almost passes out just from that little summoning of energy.
You see, Jovir continues,
Liar! The people saw you, and your foul beast rain fire down on my sister.
But I have brought your beast to heel.
You will die by its flame.
You see fire shoots up from the pit like some great beast is waiting inside.
And we will unite the Feywild anew!
A baptism in the blood of our enemies!"
You hear cheers of the crowd, and you see the executioner hit Syrah with a butt of his
hammer to shove her forward.
And as this happens, you see the first little bit of sun begins to peek over the horizon.
Jovir lifts her hands up and removes her crown.
See it floats above her head.
One of her Fomorian attendants brings over another crown.
The one that Syrah had used to steal the power of the Seelie Crown, but it looks like it's
been decorated ceremonially, like it has flowers and stuff wrapped around it, like something
more like Cirilla would wear.
And then you see the Unseelie Crown, this thorny crown with shadows whipping around
it, and the new Seelie Crown, the wreath of flowers that looks like it sucks up little
bits of sunlight and creates something like fireflies around it.
Jovir holds her hands up with the two crowns.
She seems to be whispering some kind of incantation
and performing a ritual to bring them together.
It almost looks like she's trying to pull them together telekinetically, and naturally
the crowns want to separate.
You see that she is straining to pull them together as their magics reject each other,
but eventually it looks like she's starting to overpower them and they begin inching towards each other.
And as they do, you see the sun and the moon in the sky
begin rapidly rising and falling.
You see the waves in the ocean begin to get wild.
You see Okorilla, whoa, has to use all of her power
just to keep it choppy and uneven,
just to keep it a normal, uneven, just to keep it a normal terrible storm that would
normally destroy ships.
You hear Jovier yells out, the sun sets on our enemies and a new dawn rises for the Feywild.
You see Jovier straining looks down from her ritual to the executioner.
Kill her.
The Executioner prepares his hammer,
Groshlet's had a mighty gust that sends the whole army forward,
everybody go ahead and roll initiative.
Oh, I really want a good initiative.
Saul, let's actually go directly for that.
I would actually liken that to any of this time.
That's a 17.
19.
13, but you're the one driving.
Here's how this combat is going to work.
You guys are trying to save Marigold, you're trying to save Cyra, you're trying to stop Joveir,
but there are also thousands of enemy forces and your allies are going to have to fight them or else this is unwinnable.
You'll just be taken over by attacked by a million Wyverns and guys will just be shooting ballistas at you and shit.
Just completely not winnable.
There will be one initiative for aerial battle
and one for ground troops.
On initiative 15, there will be a contest for aerial warfare
and on initiative five,
there will be a contest for ground warfare.
You and the enemy will both roll a D6.
If you win, the enemy lines weaken.
If you lose, your lines weaken.
The enemies add plus one to their rolls, and you add plus zero since they're defending
and you're naturally at a disadvantage.
But every time you win a contest, their bonus goes down by one.
If it gets to minus two, they flee.
The same is true when your allies lose as well.
If your allies get wiped out or flee, like I said,
it means that new bad guys will enter the initiative and get involved in the Jovir fight,
which is bad news. Queen Jovir has a bunch of bullshit to pump up her guys, but don't
worry, because you guys can command your NPC allies to offset this. Your NPCs have hero
points that they can expend during the contests. You may use each of these heroic actions once,
and then they recharge each round on a five or a six,
so kind of like a dragon's breath.
I will hand out to you guys what the heroes can do.
Oh, so many papes.
Okay. Oh, we've got air heroes and ground heroes.
In the air, you've got Mob Goblin, Recharge, 5 and 6.
Mon Albin provide Magitek cover fire to ground or air troops.
You can add one to the next roll.
Damn.
Dragons, Recharge, 5 and 6.
Elzorn Igneous restraining line of wyverns with swooping chain hook attacks,
freeing up Big Bev and Shiver Blight to provide air cover for ground troops,
adding plus two to their next roll.
Garrosh recharge five or six.
Garrosh sends a scattering wind that resets the battlefield.
You may force the enemy to reroll their die and reroll yours if you so choose.
Then we've got ground heroes, knights, giants, and automatons.
Oh my.
Recharge five and six.
The young stag and Gregor rally the ground troops, add plus two to the roll. So this is kind of like Albin and Ma Goblins, but only for the ground troops
Gotcha they can't support the air a coral in the sea elves a coral and powers gunk to smite the ocean
Yeah, sending a scattering wave onto the shores
Force the enemy to reroll their contested die in a ground contest and reroll yours if you so choose
We're standing on Dunk. So powerful.
This is the sea slash ground version of Garrosh's ability.
And then finally, perhaps the best ability, Jaina Bronzebeard.
Recharge five and six, superior military mind.
Jaina scans the battlefield and plans a counterattack.
You may swap roles with the enemy.
Ooh.
As long as you have the hero points to do it you can declare as many hero actions as you like
Oh the dice is rolled, but only one after so you basically only get one reaction per contest
So basically like contested d6 is like warhammer, and then we have these ways to sort of
So she has more straightforward stuff like she has legendary actions
That's like she can just give everyone plus one for the round. Okay, you guys have these utility things that can come in handy
I would advise you not to be super stingy with them
Yeah, because she has an advantage if it's just flat rolls
But if you use all of them there is the possibility that when the next round comes along you'll roll a one two and a three
And have no abilities, you know
So air heroes
will reroll their abilities to see if they recharge on the air initiative ground heroes
will reroll on the ground initiative if you are able to get the enemy to flee you can start on
the ground or air initiative having allies do full attacks so shiver blight could just like come in
and do a breath weapon on Juvir.
Or you can have like Bear Lane attacker
or something like that.
So you can start, or you can have like Mimaw cast
like mass healing word or something like that.
Like you can start calling in allies
as like Final Fantasy summons essentially.
The opposite happens if your guys flee
on each ground and air initiative,
new minions enter the battlefield.
So like a D4 of Wyverns or something bad, that kind of shit.
And then the rest of it is normal sort of combat stuff.
We are going to use our dragon riding rules
that we did with the High King,
which is that while you guys are in the place
riding your dragons, if you are fighting another dragon, or another serpent in this case,
you get a three-quarters cover, so you get plus five to AC and DEX
while you're in place.
Certain abilities and stuff might knock you out of the saddle,
which would give you half cover and at risk of falling off.
As we get into initiative, you guys see that the projection
ceases in the sky above you because you guys begin approaching Castle Winter very quickly. You see
this mountain, Jovir is atop the mountain so she's sort of at the midpoint of the battlefield. You'd
need to be able to fly or be on a serpent to get to her. Above her are Wyverns and Dracoliches,
these like skeletal dragons and all of like
the flying minions.
And then on the ground, like down in the shore
is the actual castle that has like manganelles
and ballistas and all of that kind of stuff
and minions down there.
And that is who Coralil and the Green Knights
and whatnot are going to be fighting
and Gregor and the automatons and whatnot.
And whenever we get like close enough
and we're like about to go into battle,
I'm planning my Meteor Witch,
Fount of Moon Knight.
And I'm also going to, for the first time,
use Sacred Weapon.
Whoa.
That's my channel divinity.
So for a minute, my weapon adds a plus five to attack.
Sick, yes.
If you guys want to do anything,
I'll say that G'raash does this one last gust
with like the last bit of his power.
You guys have essentially a round
that is like a dash action of you guys getting there.
Like you guys see the battlefield is coming into focus.
Callie blesses her weapon.
Does anyone else have anything
they'd like to cast on themselves or anything?
Can I cast Hunter's Mark on Jovear?
Fuck yeah, you can.
Yeah, you see. Ooh.
As you come into view, you see Jovear.
Anything, Saul?
No, I just do a couple pushups to get a pump going.
You see-
Shit, your pecs are popping.
You see Mob Goblin, the airship, rides up next to you,
and Albin shouts out,
Saul, do you want a little pick me up?
I thought you'd never ask.
He's gonna go ahead and cast Haste on you.
Yes!
Woo hoo hoo!
Let's fucking go.
Yeah.
You're doing a lot of pushups now.
Yeah, you see.
Up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up.
Saul, super fast.
And I'll activate the patch on Kali
to give her the disadvantage on the displacer,
the displacer patch. Okay, okay. Jeez, okay, cool. So she give her the disadvantage on the Displacer patch.
Okay, okay.
Jeez, okay, cool.
So she's got the Displacer patch right now.
Nice.
As you guys fly forward at hundreds of miles an hour,
wind whipping around you as Garrosh does this mighty push,
at initiative 20,
Jovir is making the first of three DC 20 arcana checks to combine the crown. She
has to use a full action to do it. You see she has two Fomorian supplicants who are helping her.
You see they are literally giving her their life force. They are doubled over with pain.
As streams of moonlight connect them to their queen in the moonlight, you can see quarts of their blood moving from them to Jovir.
You see the sky shakes and trembles as the two crowns move towards each other.
You see the moon and sun begin to move towards each other in the sky.
It's very fucking cataclysmic.
She's going to make a roll with advantage.
The Fomorians are helping her.
People are cheering for this?
That is a 29.
You see she successfully
gets one third of the ritual done, gets them closer. Okay. All right, off to a bad start.
After her turn, Saul, that is your turn. Licorice Axe on your turn. All right, I see this ritual
going down. I was built to interrupt shit. Yeah. I'm going to fly a licorice down,
just a quicksilver bolt headed right
for one of these Remorians.
I'll send licorice towards one
and myself towards the other.
Okay.
I have an ability that lets me get HP
when I defeat someone.
Okay.
So I see this blood going towards Jovir
and I'm just gonna put my mouth in front of it
and start gulping it down.
Go ahead, okay.
Go ahead and give me, I'll say a contested.
You can do your wisdom, and she'll use her arcana
as you jump in and drink this blood that
is being used in this ritual.
We're drinking blood.
We're drinking piss.
I guess functionally, I want to kill this Fomorian to interrupt the ritual, but yeah, I'll do
the ritual.
I'll do the ritual.
I'll say it'll give you Bane or Bless based on if you win or lose.
Here we go.
She rolled a natural 20.
Oh, that's cool.
Yeah, congratulations.
33.
Oh my god. You, Saul, you start to drink this blood
that is being used in this insane god ritual
and you immediately start feeling yourself
like fade from existence.
You just start like disappearing.
Saul, it's bad blood.
I thought we had a really specific mission
and now you're just drinking things.
You have Bane for the turn.
So you subtract a D4 from the attacks that you make here.
But you also have Haze.
I do have Haze.
Saul, go ahead and give me an insight check
as you drink this blood.
Yeah, you see it's flowing up to Joveir
as she's trying to combine these crowns.
You don't get the sense.
I will say that, actually give me your insight check.
Okay, insight check.
That's a 12. Okay.
You don't get much from the blood
other than you know that this is what they're doing
to help Jovir.
So stopping them will stop the help actions on Jovir
and will stop them from protecting her.
You do get the sense though that these crowns
aren't something that you could just go up and grab.
Like you feel like an anti-magic field around them.
There is, you being like a level 13 monk
who has like perfect control of your body,
are still feeling yourself like almost like thrown back.
There is like a wind here from like a magical rejection.
Well, I haven't tasted much blood in my life,
but this tastes worse.
So go ahead, make your attacks on the femurian okay and take away
Three from the rolls okay as you feel queasy from drinking these guys
It's a set you on pepper. We ate so much freaking cursed stuff for this
Bones and shit
Yeah, we just went down to the pit and just ate whatever was in there.
It's real earthy.
Damn.
31, minus three, and then 25 minus three.
No sweat.
Hit him both times.
That's 28 points of damage.
Cool.
Still looks pretty healthy.
You see more blood pours into the moonlight and goes up.
Don't drink that one.
Yes. Squeeze me. Squeeze the blood out!
Oh no, they like it.
Do you want to do Flurry of Blows or Stunning Strikes or anything?
I'll Flurry of Blows. Oh, and I'm hasted so I can attack again.
Oh, fuck yeah you can.
Yeah you can.
I believe it's just one extra attack.
Yes. I'll do my extra attack and Flurry of Blows, there's gonna be three more attacks.
Sick!
Yeah, you see, Saul's just a flurry of just like speed bags to their face.
Gagging the whole time.
Ugh, ugh, ugh.
25 minus three.
Hits.
26 minus three.
Hits.
27 minus three.
Hits.
Damn, dude.
The bane is gone.
You've passed it.
You like hack up a gross blood loop.
There's too many fingernails in this.
There shouldn't be fingernails in your blood, man.
Mr. Bufo, why did you drink the blood?
That's, you know what?
When you're a full knight, you'll understand.
All right, yeah.
Ah, that's 37 points of damage.
Sick, okay, yeah.
You are beating the shit of this Fomoran.
You have him like mounted and you're just pounding into him,
but he's just smiling and has this glazed look in his eyes as he holds his arms up to give more blood to Jovier
Freaking cold
But you see Jovier looks down and she goes don't die too fast
Stop enjoying this
After Saul's turn Saul is there anything else you want to do you have licorice?
Can licorice act please?
Yes, breathe fire
Yeah, I'll just breathe fire on the Silberjacks
Breathe fire on Jovian the Cormorans You can get all of them with licorice act please? Yes. Yeah. Yeah, I'll just breathe fire on this. Breathe fire on Jovi and the Cormorans.
You can get all of them with Licorice.
Yeah.
Oh, sick, yes.
So Callie is on the back of Licorice.
Licorice whips around and angles it
in a way that it'll hit everyone.
Saul, you jump back, get back onto Licorice
so that you're not hit by this.
Callie, can you help me?
Just rub the starlight sacks underneath the neck.
I got you, Licorice.
Okay, Licorice has a very high DC, they fail.
Yes, okay, roll 16d10, my friend.
Okay, do you wanna help me with that?
Yeah.
One, two, three.
Oh my God.
86 damage.
Wow.
Make that blow.
Fire damage.
Licorice fully fries the one that Saul was just fighting.
So Saul, you see there's nothing left,
but like a steaming pile of flesh
as the moonlight just begins sucking up the remains.
Oh, it caramelized the blood.
That Fomorian-
Don't drink that no matter how appetizing it looks.
That Fomorian can no longer help Jovir at all.
Yeah.
Here is something you see though.
You see the other Fomorian gets lit up by this starfire.
But you see as the starfire goes to hit Jovir,
there's this wall that goes up
and then you see a shockwave that goes through the moonlight,
connecting her to the other Fomorian,
and then he's hit with the starfire again,
and that Fomorian dies.
So Jovir takes zero damage,
but both of her supplicants are fucking gone.
Okay, okay.
We killed your blood boys.
You will be my blood boy.
Looks at you, Saul.
Ah!
The nickname actually works. You wish. You can't handle this spicy blood. Looks at you Saul. The nickname actually works.
You can handle this spicy blood.
You still have more movement and stuff with
licorice. I'm going to give him a
pat. Serpents don't have
butts but I'm going to pat the thing
that approximates a butt on a snake
and give him a little key
tell him to use Step of the Wind to get
Callie down to her sister and then come
back up to give me a little AC coverage.
Sick, okay.
So flies down with Kali, Saul, you're up top
on this altar of stars.
It's just you and Jovier.
Jovier looks down at you insignificant little ant
as she continues concentrating on the two crowns,
literally moving the sun and moon closer to each other.
You see overhead just thousands of wyverns that looks really hard to do
It is be annoying if someone tickled you right? Yes, go to tickle her you see licorice comes back up
Sans Kali you're able to hop back on licorice and get your cover for now
Kali
You are brought down by licorice onto the platform.
Drop me off right in between the execution on her.
Yeah, so you get down there and you're kind of like, even as fast as we were, were we
fast enough?
All this dude had to do was essentially use like a prepared reaction to shove Saira.
So you get close to the platform and you see something strange, you see
chaos, you see the knights that escorted Syrah out here, a bunch of them are fighting each other
and the Fomorian executioner is grappled with a large knight, you see that Syrah is teetering
over the edge while another knight holds her with a thorn whip.
You see Olly, her duck, is trying to pull her back frantically, but Syrah is out on
her feet and falling forward.
Um, okay, can I go to her?
You...
Licorice has his turn, but it is not your turn right now.
Okay, but I have a reaction, right?
Yes.
Feather fall.
Can I cast feather fall so that she's lighter and easier to Thorn Whip back?
Yes.
So you cast Featherfall, it stops Syrah's forward momentum, and the knight holding the
Thorn Whip jerks her back from the edge, and you see the knight's helm falls off, revealing
Triss too.
Triss!
Whoa!
I thought you turned your back on Saira!
You see Saira is there like almost unconscious leaning over the pit.
What the fuck did you say?
I mean, it's so good to see you Triss!
Yeah it's so good to see you!
I didn't say anything bad, I didn't talk shit about Saira at all!
That's true, that's true!
You just told me I was your second best friend!
Yeah!
Triss 2 is holding onto Sire here.
You see Zunark is also undercover,
is wrestling with the executioner near the edge.
And he looks up and he goes,
we were hoping you'd get here before the execution,
but we were the contingency plan.
We've got people on the inside.
This is a glorious contingency plan going undercover.
You've done it marvelously.
You see he's being overpowered
and shoved towards the hole.
I'm gonna help you out.
I'm gonna help you out.
You see here, two Fomorians down here.
One is the executioner that is currently grappling Zunark.
There is one Fomorian that is heading for Triss too,
to like push Saira in.
And you see that the other Wintercourt knights
are being fought by other undercover members
of the court with no crowns,
who seem to have infiltrated.
But you get there and you see Saira is leaning over the edge.
She looks like weary and almost like she's looking at you
in like a dream or something.
Saira, it's okay.
Just relax.
We're gonna figure it all out.
Marigold is down there,
and she's not in her right self right now,
but we're gonna get her right.
Marigold.
Yeah.
She's so close.
I know.
You see fire licking up all around.
I want you to be prepared to remind her who she really is.
As Kallie comforts Syra, that is Calder's turn.
Okay, I guess I'm gonna direct Honeysuckle
towards this execution platform.
Okay, if Honeysuckle takes a dash action,
then you guys can get to the platform.
Okay, then I'll have Honeysuckle dash.
I wanna have him clip the outcropping of rocks.
So just as all the boulders explode,
I wanna jump off of him.
Sick.
Right next to Zunark and turn to Triss too and say,
is something happening with you and this guy?
You see Triss too goes like, what?
No, I mean we're friends, yeah. Called her nods and smiles. You see Triss too goes like, what? No.
I mean, we're friends, yeah.
Calls her nods and smiles.
And then realizes he's not sure what she meant by that.
I'm friends with both of you.
Whoa.
Right.
That stings.
Why?
Zunark is wrestling this guy next to you.
You see, Honeysuckle is actually fucking perfect
for this assignment.
Because you guys fly in,
and there is this giant cavern, right?
So you see that the guys from the Court with No Crowns
are doing a good job fighting the few knights
that are escorting Syrah,
but there are more people running in from the cavern,
from like, you can assume there's like walkways and stuff
inside the mountain.
So like the cavalry is starting to fucking rush in
and Honeysuckle can fucking close this down.
He can destroy this like part of the mountain.
I'll say if you want to seal the cavern shut
and make it so no more people can come
and hit the F femorian that was
like rushing down to go after Triss to kind of push them both in you can hit
both of them oh nice okay yeah I'm gonna do that and I'm gonna say this ends here
and then like shoot a glance at Triss to see if that landed that was yeah go
ahead and give me a performance check with advantage advantage fuck yeah
God fucking damn it. Oh my god. No can we say that I gave him a bardic inspiration before?
It's actually a really bad. Yeah, you don't want to use that. I'll say um, I'll use your luck blade. Yeah
Kenna actually is pretty soon in the initiative. So she'll she hasn't used this in a while
She has a thing that lets you reroll a saving throw.
She will use that.
It's not a saving throw.
Yeah, it's not a saving throw,
but I'm gonna let her use it.
Now that she's a Squite,
she's going to use it to let you reroll.
Oh my God, that's incredible.
I have a minus one and I rolled a seven and an eight.
Okay.
Let's see what I can get.
Okay, she's gonna let you reroll.
Getting lucky to Squite.
It's a 17. Okay. 17. Okay, okay, we needed this. Oh, it what I can get. Okay, she's gonna let you reroll. Getting lucky just quite. It's a 17.
Okay.
17.
Okay, okay, we needed this.
Oh, it turns into a 16.
Okay, turns into a 16.
You see Trish too struggling to hang on to Saira
as she's like hanging over the edge,
looks over and goes, this ends here.
Did you like write that?
Just thought of it off the cuff. That's like the smartest thing I've
ever heard. You're so quick witted. Oh my god. I, I, this ends here. It really does. It has to end
here, right? It just ends here. It so perfectly just kind of sums up this situation
that we're in.
It's effective.
Yeah.
Can I use my action to make them kiss each other?
Yeah.
You see Tris too.
Or rather give them the space to kiss each other.
Tris too starts like leaning towards Calder.
Just like drifting into the space near her.
You see she leans into you,
but loosens her grip on the thorn whip
and Cyrus starts to fall forward.
Whoa, shit, fuck.
You see she's pulled away.
My sword goes back into the hilt for a second.
Oh yeah, but we have to end it first.
But go ahead and roll your damage,
and I'll let you know if the cave collapses,
and I'll let you know what happens to the Fomorian.
Incredible.
Honeysuckle does 69 damage.
Yes!
Happens sometimes.
Nothing sexier than random numbers.
Yeah.
Randy's writing the name.
Yeah, it really is.
As a bunch of other Fomorians and knights
are rushing down the cavern,
you see Honeysuckle just bores through the entrance
and collapses the whole thing
knocks it down you see the last femurion that was running out that was going to take an attack on
tris 2 is hit with like a giant rock and briefly buried in the debris but then smashes out and goes
out and continues to run out so you've got two two problems here. You've got one Fomorian that is hurt,
was just hurt by a honeysuckle,
that is charging towards Triss two,
and then you've got this one wrestling with Zunark.
Zunark looks up and goes, protect Syrah.
You're right, thank you for giving me permission
to do something I was gonna do anyway.
Uh.
Why are we in competition?
I don't understand. Hey, What are we in competition of? I don't understand.
Hey, we're not in competition anymore.
I run up to the Fomorian and I say,
I don't think so, or not today.
This ends now, or this ends here.
The Fomorian starts to get past you.
Shit, I stab him in the shoulder.
Yeah.
27 to 21 and a 14.
The 14 actually hits.
These are just giant dudes that,
this dude's just shirtless running at you.
Oh my God.
Awesome.
Then that is 44 damage.
Okay.
Is on death's door, but still alive.
Then I'm gonna action surge.
Oh, okay, right on.
This ends now.
This ends now.
It's like every time you say it, it sounds smart.
32, 15, and a 26.
All three hit.
42 damage.
Yeah.
Calder finished this familiar.
Yeah.
Wow.
I pulled the retracted hilt,
like right up to the back of his neck and then I call Shard
so the ice just explodes through his throat.
And I say, this ended now.
Oh my God, it's like the past tense.
You just adapt it on the fly.
Saul looks away from Joe Veer and says,
holy shit, he's closing.
See, Zunark is just wrestling, they're both morons.
Calder, you see this Fomorian was so like locked
into like barreling over Triss II and Saira into the pit
that you stab into him, the momentum of his body continues
and his muscles just stop working and his head falls off
as he takes his momentum
into the pit and just falls off and explodes into the fire.
Oh.
God, that really ended.
What the fuck?
It was wild.
That dude was fucked up.
Yeah.
No Moria, no Moria.
Okay, after Calder, that is aerial warfare.
Ooh, baby.
Oh, actually, you know what?
Jovier's gotta take some legendary action.
Sure.
So she's going to use one legendary action
to pump up one of her legions by two.
She's going to pump up her aerial legion.
So they now add a plus three.
You look up into the sky and Saul,
you are up there on top of Licorice.
You see the Wyverns, the sun and the moonlight
is hitting them, creating these shadows.
But then you see the shadows like detach from them
and animate as like their own monsters
as their numbers are bolstered.
So for this D6, she's gonna be adding a plus three. Is
there anything you guys want to do hero points or otherwise? For air? Yeah do we
want to do mob goblin? Yeah yeah yeah we're gonna get plus one. Do mob goblin to get plus one
and we've got things to do. We've got a reaction. You got a reaction in case you
need to. Okay so here's how this works. You see as Big Bev and Shiver Blight and all of the dragons go in to attack the Wyverns and all of these shadows start attacking them.
Ma Goblin starts trying to mow them down with these laser gatling guns with the airship.
Let's roll D6s. You get plus one, I got plus three.
Oh boy.
That's a six! six! Let's go! Okay so seven total let's see
what I roll. Three so we got a six and you got a seven! Yeah! Amazing! Wow! Wow we didn't even have to
use Garrosh. You guys don't have to do any kind of reroll shenanigans or anything. Oh yeah. You see
at first the dragons are beset by these wyverns.
As they go to attack the first round of them,
these shadows go down and start biting their necks.
But you see, Albin and Ma have these devices
that dispel magic and stuff, and they just cut through
the shadows like butter, just start scattering them
on the wind.
Jovier's plus two was only for this role so that goes away. The
bad guys now go from defending which is a plus one to contested which is a plus
zero so now they are losing there at plus zero. Yes. After aerial warfare that is
Kenna's turn. Kenna is with Calder. Yeah. I'm gonna try something here. Uh... Yeah! Magic weapon!
She is going to run forward and try to tackle the executioner into the pit.
Yeah, Kenna!
Oh wow!
Wait, this is an ability check so she gets to add a D4 to it.
Wow!
Okay, she has skill, she has athletics plus eight so she actually has better rolls than this guy.
Can I roll the D4 for her?
Yeah, you can roll the D4 for her.
Okay, Kenna, what are you adding
because you came with a-
Taking a squite stance as she gets down
in like a football stance.
Just a one, just a one.
Okay, that's helpful though.
Okay, so she's adding,
I will roll for the Fomorian first.
Okay, Fomorian gets a 16,
she's trying to beat a 16.
So this will break the grapple on Zunark
and knock the guy back to the lip of the edge.
She successfully breaks the grapple with Zunark.
Ah!
There we go.
Squite's might is worthy of fright.
Super tight.
You see she literally like gets this guy
in like a single leg takedown,
like picks him up and starts fireman carrying
this fucking giant towards the pit. And is going to make one more athletics check to try to
shove him down. You see Junark who's been wrestling for a while goes, Jesus Christ
where'd you get this kid? I rolled a one again. Okay one again that's fine. Dirty 20
for the executioner and now Kenna has to roll. She has plus nine to this. So 11 or higher gets it.
Come on.
Actually, Kelly, you want to roll it?
Yeah.
Oh, what if I doom her?
11.
Wait, you got this.
Exactly.
Yes!
You see, yeah.
She perfectly just has enough strength
to bring him in the edge and almost throw herself off.
You see, giant fire comes up from the serpent just has enough strength to bring him in the edge and almost throw herself off.
You see, giant fire comes up from the serpent
within the pit that just completely roasts the Fomorian
that she tosses in and she leans back.
You see a bunch of her hair is burnt off.
Whoa, that was really close.
That was-
That was crazy.
That was very close.
Quite close, yeah.
But she manages to get rid of that Fomorian,
that Executioner.
Yeah.
After Kenna's turn, that is Calliope's turn.
Okay, so there's no more Fomorians here, right?
There are no more Fomorians down here.
Okay, I'm gonna get Cyra up to safety.
Calli, as you grab the Thorn Whip, you pull Cyra in,
you see there is this moment of peace in this insane battle.
The cavern has been collapsed behind you guys.
Zunark is free from having been grappled.
Court with no crowns, knights who have survived, who have infiltrated, finish killing the other knights that are down here.
And Honeysuckle has collapsed the cave so no one else can get up here.
You see war raging in the air Yeah, but in this moment you see as you catch Sire and you pull her in Sire looks up at you and goes
Clive you're here. Yes. Yes. I've been trying to get here for for as long as you've been gone. Nobody
Nobody's ever here. I'm here now. I'm here forever. She
Looks comforted but looks in a in a daze. I'm here now. I'm here forever. She looks comforted, but looks in a daze.
I'm gonna cradle her.
And it's like, kind of like, as the younger sister, it almost feels like a milestone to be able to act like the older sister to her.
So I want to like, almost cradle her and bring her to Triss and say, Triss, can you cast Greater Restoration on her? Go ahead and give me a luck check.
We'll say on an 11 or higher, she has it.
It's a nine, but I'm going to use my luck blade.
To reroll.
To reroll this one.
OK.
That's a three.
Yeah!
OK, OK.
Absolutely brutal.
You see Triss 2 goes, sorry, I don't have that. That, okay. Absolutely brutal. Okay, you see, Triss to goes, Sorry, I don't have
that. That's okay. I can I can do cure and get her feeling better. Yeah. Okay. I'm first
before I go I want to look down. Does it seem as though what's happening with marigold is
like a magical charm? Does it seem like something I could dispel? Callie, you're holding Sire.
You hand her over to Triss too,
who gets ready to start healing her up.
You go to look into the pit and,
marigold flies out.
You are knocked back by the serpentine scales as just a wall of powerful scales appears.
And on a higher initiative, but had hid their initiative until you had gone, you see-
Oh my god!
On her fucking back, Stolen fucking valor!
Stolen valor!
You piece of shit.
Flying out of the pit is Marigold,
this enormous gold dragon who scales glimmer
like sparkling stars in the moon and sunlight.
She swims out into the open air.
I'm going to the second I see him,
I'm gonna face step right behind him.
Okay.
Like riding behind him,
grabbing around his waist.
You see, she goes to swim out into the open air.
You see her eyes are glazed.
There's no sentience there,
but just as you suspected,
there is a rider on her back,
an Elven Ranger in fine green armor with piercing green eyes.
Kali, I'm gonna say he's just gonna act on your initiative, so you guys are gonna act on the same initiative.
So you faced up.
I faced up like romantically with my arms around his waist and I'm just like, this doesn't belong to you.
So you faced up on his back.
He is prepared.
You see, as soon as you arrive there, he flips back and faces you face to face, riding on
it backwards.
And he goes,
Kaliope.
You should keep your eyes on the road.
You seem pretty new at driving this thing.
Don't worry, she's very well behaved.
She takes our guidance.
No, she's very well behaved she takes our guidance. No she's manipulated
you've charmed her don't think that it has anything to do with your training it has to do with your
bewitching. Calliope I don't have the power to charm anyone not like that but... I attack him.
I attack him. Go ahead and make your attack on him.
And I am like, I'm glowing with moonlight.
So I like really want to focus on that because I know that she's trying to like use moonlight.
So I'm trying to use it myself.
You see as you go to do a smite and use moonlight, you do see it's like flickering, almost like using too much electricity or something.
There's like moonlight being pulled away from her
19 on the first attack 19 would hit he's going to use a reaction to parry you see he
Very quickly gets a dagger up that blocks it you recognize this as the one that cut your hair
Oh, well, you must be fast friends by now.
I hit him again.
24.
24 does hit.
Yes, okay.
So yeah, so you swing around and you go to hit him
and you see that he has been outfitted
in like this pristine green armor.
Like he's gotten an upgrade
even since he has joined the Green Knights.
I'm going to do a Bardic Flourish
as well as a fourth level Smite.
Just so fucking pissed off.
Calder, you just hear the clanging of steel
as they fly up into the air.
That's gonna end bad.
Was that fucking Glen?
Yeah, that's all you just see, Glen.
Kenna yells, yeah!
Oh shit! Oh my God, I saw you just see Glenn. Kenna yells, yeah! Ah, shit!
Oh my God, I rolled so poorly.
I rolled four ones.
That is horrendous.
I guess you don't wanna hurt me, Kaliope.
No, it's that I've been so excited for this moment
that now I'm nervous that it won't live up
to all the times I've dreamed of doing this.
Oh, you dream of me, Calliope.
Of course I do. You don't dream of me?
Oh, I do.
I thought so. 32 damage.
Oh, can I use my helm? A reaction to command an ally to take an attack?
Yes, you can. She would have to use her reaction.
Okay.
So that you want it. You do want to do that? Okay, nice.
So you'll get an extra two more attacks, Jesus.
Really?
Yeah, but you'll have no reaction for the round.
Okay.
Okay, the way I do it is just by yelling,
Gally, this guy sucks, right?
Absolutely.
31 to hit.
Okay, hits.
Go ahead and do your last attack as well, yeah.
And 27 to hit.
Two more hits.
Okay. Yeah. Doing... 27 to hit. Ah, two more hits. Okay.
Doing two more smites.
89 damage.
Damn.
Thank you, Golda!
Okay.
Wow.
Glen looks supremely fucked up by it.
Yeah.
Good.
But after you stab into him,
he pushes off of you
and does a back roll and steps back,
pulls out his bow and gets ready to take an attack on you.
But first thing he's going to do is use a bonus action,
pull out a Supreme Healing Potion.
And he's going to roll, gets back 43 HP.
Oh God.
He looks heartened and strengthened
by having just done that.
And he's going to take three lightning quick arrow shots
at you from across the serpent.
Okay, let me know the first time one hits.
And also I've got soul's blessing.
Yeah, the dislaser patch.
Oh, you do.
Okay. Yeah.
So disadvantage.
Oh hell yeah. Disadvantage on the first attack.
What is your AC?
My AC right now, I only got a one on my bardic,
so it's a 20.
Okay.
21 with disadvantage?
Yeah, that hits.
Okay, you see as this arrow flies forward,
it suddenly has like, tendrily shadows around it
as it strikes into you,
and you feel something eating at your mind,
like some kind of poison or something.
Go ahead and give me a wisdom saving throw.
Okay.
Ooh, that's really good.
23?
That passes.
So you take 14 damage from the arrow,
then you take 11 psychic damage from the effect,
but the effect doesn't fully take place.
This was a shadow arrow and it would have made it
so you can only see five feet in front of you.
So for a moment, for a moment this hits you
and the entire world goes out of focus
except for your feet in front of you.
Well, this is very poetic
because of my Fount of Moonlight spell.
Anyone who hits me has to make a constitution saving throw,
and if it's failed, then it has the blinded condition.
Oh, shit.
My next turn.
Okay.
Tit for tat.
So, really beautiful stuff.
Passes.
So, hits you, but you're able to block the effect. You hit him back with
the magic, but he's able to block the effect. Flips back. You see, Calliope, we make each other
better. Who would have thought a little Crick elf could be here? A little Eladrin. And what are you
here? You're just another pawn. Just another pawn? I'm riding a great serpent in the High Queen's army!
You're riding a great serpent who has like training wheels on.
Congratulations, your mommy charmed the fancy beast and now you're riding it.
That's so impressive.
Talk to me when you've actually mastered the beast yourself.
Call their whistles.
when you've actually mastered the beast yourself. Called her Whistles.
True, perhaps I didn't tame the serpent myself,
but I did tame the beastlands.
Did you?
Isn't that just as good?
How did that feel good for you?
What was your gripe against Oberyn?
For a little elf from a backwater village
to kill an archfey?
Oh my god, do you think you're an underdog in this story?
Of course.
Your little underdog who just went to the beastlins who weren't bothering you at all
and killed someone big so you could feel bigger?
He points at you and he goes, yes, Kaliope.
That is rivalry.
We make each other better.
Stronger with everyone we defeat.
Rivalry? That's your purpose in this world?
You took away my purpose.
I wanted to be the Peepaw.
This is my revenge. This is my purpose, yes.
Oh my god, yeah, you chose revenge.
I almost did that too, so I get it.
It's very enticing.
Well, thank god you didn't choose revenge.
He's gonna take two more shots at you.
26 to hit on the second one.
Hits.
29 to hit on the third one.
Can't enchant any more arrows,
but does do 19 damage and then 22 damage.
Oh my God, okay, let me see if I keep my concentration.
Oh, yes I do.
Nope, that's an at one, I dropped my spell.
Yikes.
Oh, fuck.
That sucks.
So, hits you in the shoulder.
Well, you're finding out now, Murph,
I took the tough feat when we leveled up.
Whoa!
So.
Good for you.
Yes.
Happy to have all those experts.
Calla, you have this grit and strength
that you didn't have before.
And now in this moment, you kind of grit your teeth
as the third arrow hits you.
And like, what would have in the past been like a fatal hit?
I rip the arrow out of my chest and I just say,
the clipe he faced off before was weaker.
I'm banking on it.
Triss, just promise me we won't end up like that.
Well, like what?
I can't see anything.
You can't hear that?
You see Glenn is then going to run around the serpent
and get on like her underside. Looks like he has spider climb or something like that. Glen is then going to run around the serpent
and get on her underside. Looks like he has spider climb or something like that set.
So he is literally hanging upside down on the serpent.
Then that is Marigold's turn.
Kaliope, you watch helplessly as Marigold flies up.
What a good distraction he's made.
I forgot to even try to dispel her charm.
God, damn it, I never learn.
I always just worm my way into your thoughts.
Yeah, you do.
Even now I feel like I'd still hook up with you.
We simply have to hand it to him.
Saul, you are on top of Licorice.
You suddenly see Marigold comes between you guys
and Jovir, this enormous gold serpent
that dwarfs Licorice, and she's got these glazed eyes
as she unleashes fire breath on you and Licorice.
Go ahead and give me dexterity saving throws.
In addition to all of the stuff you have, you have plus five.
Callie, did you kick Glen off?
Um, no.
I did exactly what I set out not to do,
which is I sought revenge rather than devotion to marigold.
So sometimes it benefits you to learn to listen to yourself.
I turn to Jovier and say, once my friends figure out their romantic lives,
get them untangled, you are toast.
I don't know what's going on.
You're going through some stuff.
Okay, Dexter, do you save?
Yeah.
24.
Just saves.
Oh boy.
Go ahead and roll for Licorice. Yeah, okay. That's an 11. I'm
going to use my first legendary resistance. Okay, so still takes half. So
Licorice is gonna take 40 though as Marigold rains fire down on Licorice.
Marigold, that's your sibling! Licorice hisses, Licorice hisses and gets ready to fight.
That's okay, you guys can fight each other.
Jovir is going to take a legendary action and shoot a moonbolt at Licorice.
Whoa.
Trying to kill your damn serpents, guys.
26 to hit Licorice?
Yes, that hits.
Okay, that hits.
Okay, 24 damage.
Quit blasting my worm.
She's then going to add two to the ground troops down here.
So they have plus three as we go all the way down
to ground warfare.
Ground town.
Oh shit.
At initiative five, you see a Coralil summons a mighty wave that crashes the ships of the
caravan into the shores.
As warriors come pouring out, Gregor and the Frost Giants clear the way with swinging club
and axe attacks, knocking back enemy knights.
Jaina Bronzebeard and the dwarves run alongside Berlain and the automatons as they charge
onto the battlefield. Above them
are low-flying airships of Green Knights. Cannon fire rains down on the castle
while troops begin feather falling out engaging the false Green Knights. Leonor
and his troops on a higher ledge of the battle. You see the two troops of Green
Knights go at it. For ground heroes we've got Knights, Giants, and Automatons, oh my.
That's adding plus two to the ground troops.
You have a Coral Hill and the Sea Elves
that will let you scatter and make them re-roll the die.
And you have Jaina Bronzebeard that will potentially,
as like a reaction, let you swap dice with the enemy.
I think, yeah, we probably just wanna use Knights,
Giants, and Automatons and then see what happens.
Okay, so plus two versus plus three.
You see as the young stag and Balnor and their troops
engage with the false green knights,
cries go up for Queen Cirilla.
A core a little sense like scattering waves
that bring the troops so high onto the shore
that they're actually behind some of the knights
that were like anticipating them.
Are the knights like surfing onto the shore.
They're essentially like flying up there.
Yeah, gunk and the other shrimp knights,
beach, get onto the shore with their shrimps
and begin swinging down.
Go ahead and roll.
Let's roll competing D6s.
Okay. Do you wanna do it?
Yeah, I'll roll it this time.
Okay.
What could go wrong?
Jovir got a five, that's eight.
Okay, okay.
That's a six. Woo!
Okay, oh no, now we're tied.
Now we're tied.
Yes, we're tied.
Oh, okay, okay.
We can make that, let's make them reroll.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
If you use the reroll,
there's a great chance you'll win.
But she could roll a five,
she could roll a six.
That's the only danger,
is if she rolls a six.
Yeah, but it's gunk that's gonna force her to reroll.
I feel like we have to. We have to bet on gunk. We have to bet on gunk. Okay, we have to bet on g's gunk that's gonna force her to reroll. I feel like we have to.
We have to bet on gunk.
Okay, we have to bet on gunk.
Okay, you guys want her to reroll it?
My fourth son.
Okay, so you guys have a total of an eight.
She adds plus three to this.
A five ties it.
Yeah.
A six beats it.
You see a Coralil and the Sea Elves, Ursea
and the other Octomagi power like plant life in the ocean. You see like rich like
coral reef and stuff under the water like comes a light and you see Gunk dips his sword in the water,
holds it up, it is shining bright and he goes ready to smite! Smites into the water and makes her reroll as it scatters the lines of enemies
Let's say if they scatter into a worse or better position
Get going
Always bet on gunk. Okay, so you guys used two hero points on that one
We'll have to roll to see if you can get anything back. But you see, smites the water
causes this huge wave that wipes out a bunch of knights on the shore, making a clear line for the
giants and dwarves to get through. The shore is now contested. They are no longer in a superior
defensive position, so they will now get plus zero to their rolls. Yes!
After ground warfare, that is back to the top of the order.
That is Queen Jovier's turn.
Queen Jovier is now rolling checks flat.
She does not have her Fomorian supplicants anymore,
but she has very high arcana.
She manages to successfully continue the ritual.
You see that with one more push of magic,
she is going to be able to combine these crowns.
You see the sun and the moon in the sky begin to,
it's like a half eclipse right now.
They begin to like come together.
Oh dear. Don't do that.
It's fine. I can control it.
I can control it.
Clearly that's a bad idea. It doesn't feel fine. After Queen Jovier's turn, Saul, I can control it. I can control it. Just clearly that's a bad idea.
It doesn't feel fine.
After Queen Jovier's turn, Saul, that is your turn.
Okay.
Very funny to watch this like Grand Eldritch Wizard casting this ritual and I'm just gonna punch her in the belly button.
Sure, yeah.
Yeah, let's go for it.
Go nuts.
Are you doing anything?
So Licorice is engaged right now with Marigold.
Right. So let me know how you're using movement, if you're jumping off. Are you doing anything? So Licorice is engaged right now with Marigold. Right, okay.
So let me know how you're using movement,
if you're jumping off.
If Licorice is engaging Marigold,
can I point out Glenn to Licorice?
Licorice, this man has hurt mommy very much.
Wait, I thought this was between you and I,
Collada, Koliathy.
This dance forever, the bards will sing of our coupling.
I thought about it. You said we brought out the best in each other and for a moment I was a bit seduced by that.
But no, you actually bring out the worst in me and then you get off of that.
That's how this has always worked.
No, no, Koliathy, let's be rational here. I came here to be devoted to Marigold and
you dragged me back down into a place of vengeance and hatred and that's what I came here not
to do. We make each other better Kaliope, we make each other stronger. Remember that
scared girl who came to me in the living wood? Yeah and everything- And what was I? I was
a schemer and a dreamer living there, and look where we are now!
We're battling for the fate of the Feywild!
Isn't that fantastic?
Everything that you see now before you is in spite of you.
I had to run away from you to get everything I have now.
Licorice, fucking kill him!
Oh, wait.
This is not, no, no, no, no, no!
This is not, no, no, no, no, no!
Glenn was straight up not expecting this. He doesn't have enough HP.
He might be able to defend himself enough.
Uh, go ahead and if you'd like to make attacks on Glenn...
You don't have to if you don't want to.
No, no, no. You can. Okay.
I don't want to eat him.
Here's what I'm gonna say for Glenn.
Mm-hmm.
Glenn is using some shenanigans to like hang upside down.
Right. I'm gonna say that's gonna not give him the extra
plus five AC, but it'll give him plus two.
Okay.
So he's got a 21 AC right now.
Oh my God.
And I will tell you, he has,
I'm not gonna tell you how much he has.
He has his hand on another potion.
He's like.
I like how much you didn't expect this
and are so delighted.
You're gifting right now.
No, no, no, this is not.
Calliope, we are end game.
No. You and I.
That's the thing,
is this isn't about me taking you out.
This is about you being gone
so I can do the thing I actually came here to do.
Because you are just a poison
and you always have been.
I'm a sweet poison that we drink together.
Yes, even you, you just called yourself a sweet,
you just called yourself a poison.
Ah, you broke.
Licorice, you look hungry.
It's over, man.
Licorice, can I tell you, can I tell you,
Licorice, he's delicious.
Yeah, this guy wants some sweet poison.
Jesus Christ, okay.
First off, see if he rerolls his breath.
Oh yeah, he could. Okay, yeah, I was gonna say. Unroll, Okay. First off, see if he rerolls his breath. Oh yeah.
He could.
Unroll and, that's a six.
He got the breath.
Okay.
Here's the deal though.
If you do the breath, you will hit Marigold.
Oh.
But you might have to do, so full transparency,
the way you're gonna get Marigold out of this
is you do have to burn her Legendary Resistances
to some extent.
Okay.
If you try to get rid of the charm with like a Dispel Magic or something, she's gonna resist that. So you do have to burn her legendary resistances to some extent. If you try to get rid of the charm
with like a dispel magic or something,
she's gonna resist that.
So you do have to do something to her.
I think we gotta let the siblings fight.
Yeah.
Yeah, you do see Licorice isn't fully calculating.
This is just like,
just two cats rolling around going after each other.
Knock some sense into your sibling.
Do it.
Okay.
He rolls a deck safe.
Yeah.
Oh yeah, no constitution. Oh. Is he good at that? Is he good at that? He
physically he needs to roll a natural 20. Okay, I'll roll this
right in front of Emily. Jesus Christ.
Oh, actually, dragon riding shenanigans. Okay. Okay. Is he
riding though right now?
He is riding, so he has quarter cover,
so he's like half off.
He's only gonna take half damage if his mount saves.
Okay. Okay.
So Marigold is going to roll a con saving throw.
She's got pretty good con.
She might just pass it on her own.
She passes, so she's gonna take half.
And he'll take half damage as well? And he'll take half damage as well.
And he will take half damage as well,
but that straight up might be enough to kill him.
Still a lot.
Still so much damage.
Yep, Licorice, you see him?
He's hiding behind the horn right there.
Just rides up on him.
What? No.
Toast that guy.
Okay, 64 for my rolls.
I got a 34.
Oh my God.
So that's 98.
98.
Holy shit. Lic licorice finish Glenn
This is a battle the top serpents a final act of of love and hate and revenge
No, you were just always a distraction
You were never worth my time. I
feed you to my mounts.
You see Glenn has, for the first time ever,
has no response, no honeyed words.
Licorice breathes his starfire breath
onto Marigold and onto Glenn.
All that is left is his perfect, pristine armor,
steaming and smoldered.
Glenn is fucking dead, just killed by a,
oh wow, no, pretty poetic.
Yeah, that's the serpent that he stole.
Callie, Saul, you watch as the serpent,
the first serpent that Glenn manipulated,
that he trapped with a magical device,
ends up being his undoing.
The grown up licorice destroys Glenn Fier-Gladewin,
AKA Sawyer.
All your playthings are coming back to haunt you.
Yeah, you see Glenn's smoldering corpse
falls off the back of Marigold,
and you see Ro roasted Glenn falls down.
You see Big Bev swoops down, chomps him and keeps flying.
Glenn is gone.
Saul, you may take the rest of your turn.
Has Lycoris used his movement?
Lycoris has not used his movement.
All right, so I guess I will, yeah,
I'll just have a Lycoris do a flyby on Jovir.
If you do that,
he will take a opportunity attack
from Marigold.
I'm going to use Step of the Wind to do disengage.
You have Licorice break away from Marigold
and begin flying in like a torpedo towards Queen Jovir.
At the last moment, as I'm approaching,
I unfortunately get an idea from Glynn, goddamn him.
And I use my monk ability to run on the underside of the snake and I'm gonna punch her low.
Oh hell yeah.
So this is going to be with haste,
which I'm still hasted I think.
Yep.
Oh my god, yeah.
Oh yeah, unless Albin goes down.
So if the air battle goes bad,
he might lose concentration.
That makes sense, yeah.
But right now you guys are tied up in the air battle.
Plus zero, plus zero.
Yeah, I still feel him.
I still feel my heart beating really fast.
Yeah.
I think about a real spooky toilet,
and it makes my heart beat really fast.
Yeah, you think back.
I think there's a banshee in the urinals.
Frogpal.
We gotta investigate.
A poisoned urinal cake.
There's two actors smoking a cigarette.
Oh shit, we're on. Yeah, in a different room. It's two actors smoking a cigarette. Oh shit, we're on.
Yeah, in a different room.
It's just traveling through the vents.
We keep talking about hitting up happy hour after work.
What do you think that means?
I don't know, I'm gonna pee while we're here.
Is that okay?
Sure.
Okay, so that's a 13, a 17, a 15,
a dirty 20, and a natural 20.
Wow.
Yay.
Only the dirty 20 and the natural 20 hit.
She has 19 AC.
Okay, let me try and re-roll one of these.
Oh yeah, you wanna do a D4?
Yeah, I'll do a D4 on the, I got a five.
And big in your fist, you see that, yeah.
She is the size of a giant,
and seems to be kind of like growing
as this ritual goes on
So you're just in her midsection just trying to get her to break concentration
What are you doing down there? I've just hammering your lats
That's all I know how to do. Okay. Oh
Four hell yeah, 21 hits. Okay, so that's three hits three hits. Nice beautiful
21 hits. Okay, so that's three hits.
Three hits, nice.
Okay, beautiful.
41 points of damage.
Nice.
She is like fully concentrating,
fully kind of prone, like holding her hands up.
And you go, you punch her in the ribs three times
and you feel all of this like magical resistance.
You throw the same exact punch in the same exact place
three times in the row, just, uh, uh, uh.
And you finally feel it start to crack,
and you see she starts to grimace
as she takes this damage.
Please stop this!
I'm absolutely not going to do that.
After Saul's turn, Jovier's very pissed off at you.
Hmm.
She is going to spend two legendary actions.
You see shadowy tendrils start to appear
out of a void in a circle
Around you and licorice this is circle of death go ahead and give me constitution saving throws
Oh and licorice okay, I wish I count to spell because of my diamond soul ability my constitution is now plus eight
You see I have diamond abs and a diamond soul.
Yeah, we've never talked about it.
You wear so much diamond jewelry.
You're always glittering.
It's gaudy.
You shut up.
I got this in Soon Air and we just never talked about it.
We never talked about it, but you are blinged out.
I love the studs on the studs.
Yeah, you got new piercings that add more studs.
Would you roll your goddamn constitution,
save me throw.
22 for Sol.
Sol passes, so we'll take half.
Shout out to the two crew.
No.
Do you want Licorice to use another legendary resistance?
Yes.
Yeah.
So you and Licorice both take half,
which is going to be 19 damage.
Oh, OK.
Both of you guys take 19 damage. Oh, okay. You guys take 19 damage
After that's really good
Damn it
After the legendary action that goes back down to Calder, okay
You see Tris to looks up and goes I can watch after Sira. Okay, she should probably think that I'm the one who saved her
Totally, and I'll tell her that story till I die.
I'm gonna go see if I can help Saira's sister
and get this serpent in the fight.
Triss two knots.
You see Zunark looks at Honeysuckle,
a little bit intimidated and goes,
I think I might do my fighting down there
and points to the fight on the ground
and starts getting ready to like hurl boulders
down onto the castle.
Okay.
I'm in.
You do you.
Gives you a predator handshake
and then begins helping out the ground troops down there.
All right, I'm gonna direct honeysuckle
towards the fight, stare longingly at Triss too
on my way out and come up in and join the sibling fight.
Sweet!
The three serpents tangle in the air.
This is a Renaissance painting, at least one I'd like to see.
And Callie is on Marigold now.
Yes!
Wow!
We're all on them!
Dare I say it, sexually charged?
Wait a second, this is like a prophecy!
There is like a collection of starfire around you guys like kind of pulling away from the
Crazy weather stuff that's happening right now. It's a serpent cyclone. Yeah, I whisper into the headpiece
I forgot to tell you guys
The serpent queen I think she's still alive and she's watching this
So this moment this moment matters. This is their recital.
Yes, exactly. That's what I was trying to say is that this is a recital. Everyone bring the best.
Get your diamonds out. Yeah. Let's dance. I'm gonna see if Honeysuckle gets his earthquake back.
Earthquake back. Nice. That's a five. Damn. Yeah. Let's shake some ground right by Jovier
Okay, so you fly around there's this brief moment of like clashing with marigold and joining licorice But then honeysuckle barrows into the altar of stars and you see Jovier looks concerned as this happens
And this starts to actually rattle and like affect her concentration on the ritual
It's a DC 23 dexterity save. She fails
Yes, yes and is going to she'll burn a legendary resistance to take half and not have to um
Half is still gonna be pretty decent. Go prone or anything. Yeah. We are rocking out that 74 damage. Okay. And I did cast
Hunter's Mark on her before we arrived. So I'm going to take my three attacks. As Honeysuckle
dives into the ground and shakes the earth and cracks it all around her. She takes all of this
damage and then you burst out with Honeysuckle like hanging out of his maw
and do a fly by swinging in on Jovier.
Oh, thank Christ, they're finally here.
Drive by icing.
That's an 18, a 19, a 27.
18 does not hit, the other ones do.
Okay, and I'm gonna use the Helm of Ultras to add to D12.
Okay. Yes.
So that is going to get rid of the second charge on it
cause you used it once when Cali was fighting Glenn.
That's right.
In what he thought was a duel.
We're gonna get bested by the machinations
he set into action.
53 damage.
Nice.
Yeah.
Jovir is still looking inhuman and like God-like
but you are doing damage.
The guys that were protecting her have been killed.
So Calder, as you slash into her, at first you're like,
God, she's got skin as hard as diamond.
She's got skin as hard as-
So does Necklace.
As Saul.
As Saul's abs.
Necklace says duck tea, by the way,
cause I ran out of money.
Yeah.
That's the unfinished business.
Yeah.
But like you're taking a pick to a rock,
you are chipping away,
and you see you're starting to break at the skin,
and you see she starts bleeding.
Salt, check it out, more blood.
She is going to bolster her air troops,
use her last legendary action to give them plus two.
After Calder's turn, that is Marigold's turn.
Marigold is gonna roll to see if she gets
her breath weapon back.
Let's see if I can get some of the magic D6s
that you guys have gotten.
Nah.
One, Jesus Christ.
Nope, that's a one.
Yes, there we go.
You asked for it in the dice head.
We don't for thirsty people.
She's just gonna take three cracks at Licorice.
So you see it's super disturbing,
does like a tail attack and a claw attack
and tries to bite at his neck.
25 to hit with the tail attack.
That hits. Okay.
Goes for a claw attack, way more than that on a claw attack,
slashes against him, bites him,
gets a 31 to hit on the bite.
So does 54 damage total to Licorice.
Just claws into him, Licorice shrieks.
She hits him with his tail,
just like bullying her little brother essentially.
And then bites at Licorice's neck
and is like hanging onto his neck.
And Licorice you see is like wide-eyed
and looking kind of scared.
Be nice!
After Marigold's turn, that is aerial warfare.
First things first, let's roll to see if Mob Goblin gets any of their stuff back.
That's a six!
God damn it!
Why is all of my stuff not recharging?
All of your stuff recharges.
The Dice Devil has come!
Six, six, six!
If it makes you feel any better on damage,
I've rolled more ones than I ever have.
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
Okay, that equalizes it.
Okay. It does.
So she has a plus two now, not a plus three,
because they're adding plus zero to this contested.
You look up in the air and it is just a mess of wyverns
and dragons fighting each other.
D6 plus two versus D6 plus zero,
unless you guys want wanna do anything.
Let's do Mob Goblin and then we'll potentially.
Do Garrosh if you want.
Yeah. Yeah.
Let's do dragons too. Yeah.
Because then we can add two to the ground
for their next roll.
Oh, to the ground. Yes.
Yeah, so we will do that as well.
Okay, so yes, the way that works is,
you guys are gonna spend one hero point.
So Mob Goblin once again is gonna provide Magiteitek cover starts firing into the shadowy wyverns that
Jovir has animated then you are going to use the dragons for their hero point Elzor and Igneous you see
Swings out a chain like a lasso over their head
Catches a wyvern and then pulls a line of them together
So they're crashing into
each other and this frees up big Bev and Shiver Blight they dive Bob down onto
the enemy ground troops and they're gonna add plus two to the ground troops
next role so they start breathing acid breath and cold breath down there so you
guys have plus one to this roll and then your ground
troops have been supported. Jake I think it's your turn. Yeah you want to roll a d6?
Yes I would love to. I will roll mine. Okay. That's a five, seven total. Oh I only
got a three. We can yeah. So garage? Okay let's do it. Force the
animator to reroll and then reroll yours. And then do you want to reroll your own die or do you want to
keep the three?
I think I have to roll,
cause I have to get higher than a three
if we're going to be in this, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
We roll sixes here, Jake.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay.
I will roll for Jewelvier right now.
Come on, come on, come on, come on.
Okay.
Two.
I got another three.
That's okay, okay, okay.
But now we're tied.
You guys tie.
Okay.
Woo!
Battle stays contested. Nice! Battle stays contested.
Nice.
Battle stays contested.
Take it, I'll take it.
You guys have lost three air hero points.
So you're gonna need to roll to recharge
every air hero thing that you have.
But the dragons are providing air cover
for the ground heroes.
So you might have big wins on the ground here,
which might mean key NPCs might come into play.
It's all about the ground game.
You see Jovier snarls. She's at initiative 15 out of legendary actions.
Okay.
After aerial warfare, that is Kenna's turn.
Kenna looks to see if any of you guys are hurting.
I'm okay.
I am quite a lot but I'm also so much stronger,
so I'm actually feeling good.
Okay, but I know that I'm a squite now,
but I still don't think I'm gonna do that much damage.
You guys like it, yeah.
Right. Attack Jovier.
Okay, you see, Kenna,
yeah, she's on the back of
Honeysuckle. Honeysuckle, right?
Okay, so she's right up there in the mix.
She's gonna take two attacks on Jovier.
Everyone should do it at least once.
Mrs. Twice.
I'm going off.
You know, a squite.
You know what, you're right.
It's not a knight.
You're right.
We're waiting for Jaina for you to become a knight.
You don't think she saw that, do you?
Nope, she didn't.
I was standing in the way.
Yeah, she did.
She just saw you take a swing, and that's all that matters.
Yeah, you didn't squite hit.
She'll give bonus action, help out, and then she you take a swing, and that's all that matters.
Yeah, you didn't quite hit.
She'll give bonus action, help action to...
Let's see, Calder does a lot of damage and stuff.
She'll give help to Calder.
That is Kaliope's turn. Kaliope, you are atop Marigold,
who is bucking wildly and has Licorice's throat in her mouth.
I know, I know.
Can I try to tap into sort of like the story constellation
that we've devoted ourselves to?
And I want to like wriggle up to where I think
that her little ears are.
And I want to like hum a sweet little lullaby.
Okay.
You feel even as you're hanging on to her
and even as she's charmed, she's like bucking around and attacking licorice.
She's not trying to get rid of you. Like she didn't attack you. Yeah. So it is this
strange thing of like she's charmed but your bond is like a little bit deeper
than that and it doesn't seem like she's gonna go after you.
Okay, I'm just gonna lean into her ear and just say,
your mom sent me, these are your brothers.
And she wanted you to be reunited with your family
and Cyra's down there and we're all here
and we're gonna be on the other side
of whatever's happened to you.
What spell would you like to cast with that?
Cast a spell, Magic.
Okay, Kali, this is a
dominate monster spell. So it is an eighth level spell. It is a DC 18 to break. I will let you roll
either your spell casting thing or her wisdom saving throw.
What's her wisdom?
Plus 10.
My spell attack is 10, so we'll just go with both.
Eight on the die exactly.
So that's 18.
So that's it, that's it, exactly.
Whoa.
Legendary resistance burned off.
She's only got two left.
Okay. Okay.
Okay, okay, making progress.
You feel while you're speaking,
as long as you're speaking, her eyes go clear-eyed,
and she lets up on licorice, but then her eyes go glazed again and she begins attacking.
But you do see that you are getting through to her.
Okay. And then I'm going to look at Sol, and I'm going to give him a bardic inspiration.
Okay. Hell yeah. That is ground warfare.
So this is now, you guys have advantage in this this one and you have some hero points to use if anything goes wrong
Yes, sir
So we already have a plus two you guys did use a Coral Hill and you used ground troops the rallying
Oh, yeah, let's find out if anyone recharge see so let's start with young stag and Greg or that's a one
That's a one does not recharge. Let's see your Coralil. Does a Coralil recharge? I'll roll it.
That's a five. Five recharges.
So a Coralil is in play and
Jaina Bronzebeard is still in play and you guys have plus two because the dragons from the aerial combat
have swooped down and provided ground cover. They add plus zero to this, you guys add plus two. Jake, you're up.
Me, okay.
All right.
Two.
That's a four.
Four.
So six.
They didn't even need to do anything.
They go from contested to compromised,
they now have a negative one.
As you see, the green knights fully take out
the false green knights, like the young stag
battles Leonora in a one-on-one fight and defeats him
uh glenn style kicks him off the edge of the cliff
Can't wait to hear songs about that one. You see him and balanor rally the rest of the troops and keep they're like breaking down
The gates to castle winter, uh as they continue to fight the automatons are up there
You see trash can and bear Lane are back to back,
just swinging and destroying Tiny Aladrin. It's so beautiful.
What's Charbin doing?
Charbin is at the back commanding his fire elementals to attack.
He's sitting down.
Yes, well I have to plan, don't I?
He's taking a phone call about a sponsorship.
Yes, what do you think about like piss energy drinks?
I forgot to use my free action to assign the Displacer Patch.
I'm going to give that to Calder this time.
You can, okay.
Thanks, dude.
After you apply the Displacer Scarf to Calder, Calder phases in and out of existence.
Jovier is going to try to finish the ritual and see if she can combine the crowns.
She gets a 21, which is enough to finish the ritual.
Could I cast Silvery Barbs?
You could. Okay.
I would like to do that.
You cast Silvery Barbs.
Yeah.
They're diamond barbs.
I'll roll
this in front of the table. She needs to get a seven or higher
on this. If she doesn't get a seven or higher. You guys are
going to get to go ham on her for another round. Okay, still
tries to finish this ritual. Seven or higher on this roll
rolling it in front of the table.
That's a 14.
That's a 14, okay.
Okay.
It was a good try though.
It really was.
It was.
You see Queen Jovier telekinetically
pulling the crowns together
as they get closer and closer.
When they finally are barely touching,
she moves her hands to the outside of them
and with one last push
shoves them together. Calder, Saul, Licorice, Honeysuckle, as you guys are all in there,
there is a seismic blast of power that blows you guys all back, blows the plinths off the altar of
the stars in the sky as this happens. You see the sun literally collides with the moon
and explodes, sending meteors showering through the sky.
I'm supposed to be the meteor witch.
The weather begins to rapidly change
now that the fucking moon has exploded.
You feel the entire earth shift,
but then Jovir takes the new joined crown,
the Seelie and Unseelie crown,
this flowery crown of thorns with shadowy tendrils that look like sunspots, and puts
it on her head. As she does, there is this blinding explosion of light as Jovir takes
a new form. You see she levitates and glows with power.
The front of her robe is now pure sunfire.
The back is of dull moonlight.
She now has two faces,
that of a primordial summer eladrin
and behind it on the moonlight side,
a greater winter eladrin.
Both sides speak at the same time.
My people, you have nothing to fear.
I command the stars themselves.
As the sky turns to havoc, you see she pulls at the heavens
and literally brings other stars and moons
closer to the Earth.
The chaos of the weather around you stops,
and she begins to
Control weather patterns you see suns and moons almost like when you guys were in the beast lands and saw like
The magical different phases of the moons. Yes like that
She's able to just shift it from day to night and perfectly control the weather here
Wow, she has taken on a
powerful new form,
and as she finishes, she had to use an action to do that.
So that is the end of her turn something.
That's good at least.
After her turn, that is Saul's turn.
Okay, wow.
The gossip raggers are gonna love this.
Yeah, you see the other dragons in the air look around.
You see Princess Shiverblight goes,
what the fuck is going on?
I'm taking notes for the Peregrine Post.
You'll be reading all about it in the Peregrine Post,
which is hypothetically an awesome new gossip brag,
assuming everyone fights their best.
You can subscribe now to get our first edition.
Two Faces, kind of a fashion faux pas, I think.
Yeah.
Okay. Saul, that think. Yeah. Okay.
Saul, that is your turn.
Okay.
Well, let's get Licorice to go ahead
and try and drain that last legendary resistance.
Okay. Roll to see if you get the breath back.
Yeah.
Fuck, that's a four.
Okay, you guys are finally not rolling perfect
on your D6.
But I'll go ahead and use my bonus action for Licorice
to try and recharge it.
Oh, sick!
Yeah, go ahead and use your key. Do a reroll.
It's three key.
Hell yeah.
Lot of key.
Shout out to the two crew.
Okay.
Okay.
Yeah, I think then in that case,
me and Licorice are just gonna tag team Jovier.
She's got two faces.
There's two of us.
I think we're gonna like start like launching our attacks
right at her face.
And then at the last minute shift
and just like punch the shit out of her ears.
Sick.
Yeah, you just go to hit her in the middle,
lick her on one side,
you jump off and attack on the other side.
All right, I'll make all my attacks at once.
I'm gonna go ahead and flurry of blows as well.
That's 31, 25, another 31, 18 and 19.
18 does not hit, the rest do, okay?
Ooh, let's go do the bardic.
Yeah, I'll use a bardic on that 18. Oh, sick, okay, hits no matter what. Crazy's 19. 18 does not hit the rest do. Okay. I'll use a bardic on that 18. Oh sick. Okay. Hits no
matter what. Her AC is 19. Oh awesome. Yeah she's still just an archfey in a robe. She doesn't have super high AC.
Despite all my rays I'm still just an archfey.
So it's going to be five hits plus my extra poison die.
Oh yeah, you're still hasted.
I'm still hasted.
Yeah.
I'm like reliving all of the stories that Albin and I had.
I feel like that's what the haste is doing,
is it's just really invigorating me thinking
about all of our adventures.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I think about the time that we entered the room of snakes. Yeah. And it was just like, clearly that like the administrators had like run out of ideas and
we just came into a big room of snakes.
Yeah.
I think Saul, as you attack and you strike Jovir and you see how far you all have come
and you look up and you see this airship with Mob Goblin and Albin is lobbing lightning
bolts off the side of the ship and attacking Wyverns and stuff.
You think back to your time at Launchpad and like, you know, you're like, you're like, Goblin and Albin is lobbing lightning bolts off the side of the ship and attacking wyverns and stuff.
You think back to your time at Launchpad and like those challenges were illusions to a certain
extent but you guys didn't know that. Like you were brave and you grew up there, you became heroes eventually. So yeah, as I like launch into Jovir ice cream,
we decide what's real!
54 points of damage.
Wow.
Yes, dude.
Jovir has just taken on this new form as a god,
the first ever like Seelie and Unseelie queen.
So commanding literally the planet,
but Saul, she reacts to you striking her.
You are going toe to toe with a literal god right now.
Bam, bam, bam.
Yeah, you're still corporeal.
Yep.
And Licorice may make attacks as well.
Three attacks, bite, tail, and slam.
Here we go.
25 to hit for bite. Hits. Oh, tail, and slam. Here we go. 25 to hit for bite.
Hits.
Oh, 23 to hit for slam.
Hits.
30 to hit for tail.
Hits.
59 points of damage.
Wow.
Woo!
Okay.
After your turn though,
she has unlocked new power.
She is going to cast her one and only ninth level spell. She is going to cast
a spell called Meteor Swarm. It's going to bring down blazing orbs of fire, plummet to
the ground at four different points you can see within range. Each creature in a 40 foot
radius sphere centered
on each point you choose must make a dexterity saving throw. The sphere spreads around corners.
A creature takes 20d6 fire damage and 20d6 bludgeoning damage on a failed save or half as
much on a successful one. So you see she has brought in new moons as she just like commands the cosmos now,
but the original moon that fucking exploded, she just brings it down to the earth with telekinetic energy,
and you see asteroids just begin blowing up the battlefield.
Everybody's gotta do saves here.
Okay.
And it is dexterity saves, so the people that are on serpents can add the plus five. Okay. Okay. And it is dexterity saves, so the people that are on serpents can add the plus five.
Okay.
And that includes, I'm gonna say Callie,
you getting up there and like whispering in her ear,
she is allowing you to ride her.
Okay, cool, so I'm like mounted now?
Yeah, you're still mounted.
If I'm mounted and my mount makes a deck save
to take only half damage, it takes no damage instead, because of my mounted combat.
Okay, so if Marigold saves, she takes no damage.
Okay, Marigold actually fails the roll,
but is going to use a legendary resistance.
Yeah! Oh, sick.
So this is going to be an insane amount of damage,
but while mounted, if you're dragon or
serpent takes half damage, you are now saving from half damage. Oh great. So you
will either take half damage or quarter damage. Okay. But since I mounted on her,
mounted combatant means she takes no damage. Oh wow, okay, but she uses legendary
resistance so she takes zero damage. Hell yeah. I rolled a nat one. Would you like me to use Indomitable on Honeysuckle?
Sure.
Yeah, you guys are connected.
That's 17.
17 fails.
I'll use a legendary.
Okay, and then what did Licorice get on his deck save?
Licorice got a 26.
Okay, that passes.
Yeah.
So everyone is trying to save from half.
What did you guys get now?
26 as well.
Shout out to the two crew.
Okay. 26.
Callie passes.
So Callie, you take quarter damage.
Okay.
So half damage of this is 65 damage.
Oh my Lord.
Wow, that's a lot.
Calliope, you take 32 damage.
Saul, you take none, cause it was a deck save.
Yep.
So you're all good.
You just jump off licorice for a moment as the meteor hits the fucking earth as a piece of the moon
Crashes into your serpent. Hey, that shouldn't happen. Yeah, hey, that's supposed to be down here. That is now Calder's turn. Okay, okay
so how many legendary
resistances have has
Marigolds gone through Marigold has one left. Okay. Go for it.
Let me see if I get the earthquake back.
Yes, that's a six.
Okay.
Okay.
When you're doing it not on land,
I'll say it's these like seismic waves
that are punching into her.
Shout out to the two girls she fails.
Two.
With your legendary resistance.
I saw that too and I was like, this is the best possible outcome.
So here's the deal.
That's what's up.
She's out of Legendary Resistances, but she's still charmed.
If that makes sense.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
She still needs a new one over, but out of Legendary Resistances, but go ahead and do
your damage.
She does have to take damage, unfortunately, so she'll take half of whatever you do.
No, she won't, because if she saved, I mounted combatant.
Got it.
Cool.
Oh, wow. She does not take any damage then, don't do anyant. Got it. Cool. Wow.
She does not take any damage then, don't do any damage.
Fucking perfect.
That is honeysuckle turn.
I whisper in her ear, it's me.
It's because I love you so much
that you've not taken any of this damage.
You feel the tension in her neck starts to kind of soften.
Because I feel your connection to Saira
and I have a connection to Saira too.
You follow her gaze and as she sees Saira,
her eyes start to get clear.
After Honeysuckle's turn, Calder, you may still act.
Okay, I'm gonna steer Honeysuckle away
and just say, hey, leave your sister alone.
I think she's a lot stronger than you.
If you do that, she is gonna get an opportunity attack.
Then I'll just have, I'll use Honeysuckle's reaction
and have him fling me 80 feet towards Jovier.
Sick!
Whoa!
That's awesome. Hell yeah.
Honeysuckle uses his manipulation of gravity
and throws Calder off towards Queen Jovier.
I'm just gonna like shoot out like a needle
with my sword in front of me.
I hope that I pierce her like a dart.
21, 17, 19.
17 doesn't hit, other two do.
Fuck it, I'm gonna use the last charge from the helm
and get two more D12s.
Okay, last charge, body pulsating with energy,
but instead of being empowered by Ultras,
you look down and see your brother Gregor,
you see your brother Gowan,
you see the other frost giants
starting to take Castle Winter,
and that inspires you.
It inspires me to do 66 damage.
Woo!
For the Ice Knife.
Fuck yeah.
You swing your mother's sword, shard,
you stab three times into Joveir,
she reacts but keeps at it. She is powered up since she has completed this ritual. She now can
use one legendary action to add two to both of her troops. So you see she reaches her hand up and you
see she literally like moves the sun to create shadows
over her ground troops and then turns back to her moon side to animate the shadows and
she does the same thing in the air as more shadowy wyverns and dracoliches appear.
She's gonna add plus two to both of those.
That is Marigold's turn.
Marigold's just gonna try to get her breath weapon back.
Fails! Woo! Honeysuckle right there. We got licorice. She's just gonna try to get her breath weapon back. Fails!
Honeysuckle right there. We got Licorice. She's gonna keep trying to beat up Licorice.
Oh no!
Why? You're going to regret this, Marigold. At the end of this, you're gonna really hate that you did this.
She does manage to hit three times.
Okay, I know you're having big feelings right now, but don't take them out on your brother.
48 damage to Licorice.
After Marigold's turn turn that is aerial warfare, baby
Okay, you've got mob goblin is used up right now dragons are used up garage is used up Yeah, they're all used up right now. We each roll a d6. Yeah, let's each roll a d6. I'll roll for garage
Okay, Grosh is back. Grosh is in play.
Grosh is in play.
I got a one, the dragons are not.
Dragons are not in play.
I got a six.
Mob Goblin is in play.
Good for you guys, all right.
Right now it is plus zero versus plus two.
What would you guys like to add to your guy?
Okay, well.
Your guys.
Yeah, let's see the Mob Goblin.
Mob Goblin for sure.
Mob Goblin is plus one.
Look at that plus one.
And then you'll see if you need to use a reaction you need to use garage, okay?
Two over here. That's a we got we got a four as well
So let's just take a test for you guys wanted to stay contest. Let's take a yeah, okay
That's fine if the ground heroes end up taking the castle
Those NPCs can get into play and as long as the air fight stays even, no more bad guys enter the battlefield if that makes sense.
You just don't get new allies.
Okay, cool.
So that stays deadlocked.
That is Kenna's turn. Kenna is going to bonus action, give a help action to Saul.
Hey!
Wait, does Cauldron need a heal? a help action to Sol. Hey! And then-
Wait, does Calda need a heal?
Oh yeah.
I think I'm far away from her now
because I got flung to Jovo.
Oh wait, is she near me?
She is near, yeah.
Okay, I will take it if she's offering.
Yeah, she'll do a full action to do a potion.
4d4 plus four, so 20 HP.
Oh, that's huge.
Thank you, Kenna.
Thank you, sis.
You're welcome.
After Kenna's turn, that's Callie's turn.
All right.
All right.
So then I'm just gonna cast Dispel Magic.
Calliope, go ahead and you've got to beat an 18.
10, 20.
Nice. Yes!
Calliope, what do you do as you cast Dispel Magic
to free Marigold from this dominate monster spell.
I'm just really gently sort of petting her and I'm pointing out everyone on the battlefield
that she has a relationship with and I'm like whispering about them and I'm saying now that
sire I know you love sire you and her bonded at the hip and that's Trish she's friends
with sire so she's going to be around a lot but she's kind of annoying. You'll be able to take refuge and that's Licorice and he
makes lightning and he's your brother and then that's Honeysuckle and he can make the
earth move and he's also your brother and that's Calda and Sol and they're bonded to
your brothers and I'm Klipe and I'm bonded to you. Klipe, you feel this flash of recognition from her. It all comes together at once. You flash back to
you comforting Licorice after you saved him from Glenn. Then you see a flashback of Mirigold's first memory of hatching and seeing Saira.
She understands the connection now, of her and her brothers, of you and Saira and her.
You see she looks down at Saira on the platform and prepares to go to her.
No, right now, we need to keep Saira safe, And the way to do that is to go after her.
And I point to Jovir.
You feel that the serpent understands that,
then turns and looks at Jovir,
and you see smoke starts coming out of her nostrils.
And here is-
Yes!
Marigold's stat sheet.
Whoo!
Let's go.
All right.
She's got serpent inspiration.
When Kaliope gives out bardic inspiration
or uses a flourish, Marigold gives her inspiration.
Oh!
Whoa!
Awesome!
That's awesome.
She also has draconic smite.
If she can do this as a reaction on her turn,
if Marigold is making a melee attack,
she may use her reaction to imbue her claws
with one of Kali's Divine Smite.
So if you want to add a smite to one of her claws, you can do that.
That's awesome.
Okay, after Kali's turn, that is ground warfare, baby.
They have a negative one, but a plus two boost from Jovir.
So they've got plus one right now and you guys are plus zero.
Yeah, but let's see if we can recharge Knight's Giants and Automatons.
Yep. Come on trash can.
I can't believe how good you guys are rolling on these hero points.
Wow. Free yourself from the wicked ways of your mother.
Wow. You have a destiny all your own.
Beep boop boop boop boop.
Yeah, you see the automatons charge forward.
They add plus two to the roll on the ground.
So I'm gonna go ahead and roll a D6.
Plus one to this, you guys get plus two to your.
Yeah.
Four plus one, five over here.
What you got?
Damn, I got a five also.
Five total?
Yeah, five total.
I rolled a three.
Wait, but we can swap.
Maybe we use Jane of Bronzebeard.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, yes, yes, we swap and we win, right?
Okay, yeah, if you wanna swap.
Okay, so you look down and you see that
as the ground troops are starting to break
down the gates of Castle Winter, giants
and dwarves and knights are starting to run in. But you hear Jaina on the comms telling
them to fall back, and you watch from above as they essentially lure a bunch of guys to
charge out of the wall and then are able to like pincer attack them
and just surround them on all sides and attack.
The lines of the ground are now broken.
They are at minus two and are in danger.
They will flee next round if they lose.
Yeah.
So they are broken.
Huge.
After the ground battle, that is Queen Jovier's turn.
You see Queen Jovier's turn.
You see, Queen Jovier is gonna use an ability called Solar Rift.
She pulls down a bit of literal like sun from the sky
out of like a shadowy tendril
that she manifests out of thin air,
flipping from her moonlight side to
her sunlight side. I'm gonna need a Constitution saving throw from Calder,
Honeysuckle, Licorice, and Saul. Okay. Okay. So Honeysuckle crit. Okay so
Honeysuckle passes so we'll take half. And then Calder got a 28.
Also passes.
Okay.
Licorice got a natural one.
Okay.
Do you have any more Legend of Resistances?
I have one left.
Yes, use it!
Use it!
Use it!
Saul got a dirty 20.
Okay, Saul fails.
Licorice takes half, Licorice takes 43.
You take 86.
You good?
Saul sees Licorice get hit by this sunlight and goes to
comfort him, but doesn't notice the beam coming for him. And he
takes all 86 points of damage and he falls.
But I've got three key points left.
Okay.
Wow. Oh, but I've got three key points left. Okay Somewhere on the battlefield
I feel igneous and Elzor and I remember that connection to Shroomrot and the spores build up in me and
I exhale this black foggy mist of algae and then back up. Yeah
See Saul it never gets old
disappears for a moment as you just see
he is hit with sun fire.
Saul.
But when the dust settles,
you see in smoldering clothing is your frog pal
barely clinging to life.
You just hardened him into a diamond.
Yeah.
I just fixed these clothes!
And then Calder and Honeysuckle take 43 damage.
43 HP, okay.
That is Saul's turn.
Okay.
So you're at 1 HP.
I sure am.
How much HP is, what's Licorice at?
Licorice is at 104 HP.
Okay.
Not good.
We're not doing great. I feel like we might...
Yeah, you see, Licorice, like a bunch of Licorice's scales are like cracked and broken
and you can feel like this great beast, like the breathing is becoming more labored.
Marigold is quite healthy right now.
If you guys wanted to like run and run-divoo with Mimaw or something.
Hang in there, pal.
Let me at least see if Licorice gets his breath weapon back.
Yeah.
Oh, that's a natural one.
Okay.
Yeah, Licorice is getting close to toast.
Okay.
I will say Licorice makes death saving throws
like anyone else.
It's not an automatic death if he gets to zero.
I can't just turn tail and run.
So I think what we're gonna do we're
gonna give it our all and then I'll use two more key points to disengage and
retreat a little bit. Sick. Oh man you're so down like he's so low though it's
gonna be so bad if he gets hit. These are my last two key points. Oh yeah yeah okay
I have to do it though. You gotta do it. I'm gonna do my attacks. Saul's been
fighting Jovir since the beginning just trying to knock out this archfey
What is your deal?
25 31 22 all hit nice. Okay, that's three hits
39 points of damage nice. Yes, dude. Okay. She's starting to look within the realm of
Nice. Yes, dude. Okay. She's starting to look within the realm of mortal right now You see yeah blood is dripping down from her face
Insolent fools. I command the Sun and the moon. Okay, Callie
Unfortunately, she is a fashion icon and she's goaded as hell right now
I just feel like I was on stars and and whatnot and now she comes along and she does it
was on stars and and whatnot and now she comes along and she does it better than me. It's my thing. I know. Honestly. It's super derivative. Thank you Calder but she's really
making it work. Yeah she's co-opting the look but she's making it shine and that is what the
article in the peregrine post is going to say. Unfortunately I'm getting ideas from her.
But they're your ideas. Go ahead and make your attacks with licorice. Yes three attacks for
licorice. Come on, big boy.
Bite, 28.
Not one on the slam, but that's still an 18.
Okay.
And then a 24 on the tail.
18 misses, other ones hit.
Okay.
21 plus 20, so 41.
41 points of damage.
Yeah!
Nice.
Yeah.
Licorice bites into her, and then I whistle,
and then we just slither backwards in the air
Yeah, okay, so use your last two key points. You see Saul still steaming on Lickerish's back
Flies back and launches back into the air as you disengage. Yeah as that happens can Kenna jump from
Marigold to Lickerish. Oh good idea. Yeah. Okay, yeah, you pick up Kenna with licorice
and Kenna rides off with you guys.
Great call.
I'm naked except for my giant necklace,
which is covering my junk.
Well, you also have your cloud cuff.
Yeah, that's true.
Just a diamond necklace and a cloud cuff.
After Saul's turn, she's gonna use two legendary actions
to cast a spell.
She's gonna cast a spell called maddening
darkness you see she reaches her hand up and literally just extinguishes one of the suns
and creates complete darkness in a sphere around her honeysuckle and calder are currently in that
sphere and next up in the initiative is Calder's turn.
So Calder, you are in complete darkness with Honeysuckle here.
The battlefield is silent.
You no longer hear anything going on outside.
It probably feels at first like you've been banished or maybe even killed.
Like did she cast some death spell on you and send you to a void because you don't even really see
Honeysuckle, but you feel him a little bit there with your connection to him. Okay, and
After a moment of silence you begin to hear
Dissonant whispers getting louder and louder and you feel someone
prying into your mind like
Psychic voices are asking you questions and against your will,
you're answering them, like they're digging up memories
and bringing things forward.
Go ahead and give me a wisdom saving throw
and give me one for Honeysuckle as well.
Man, is this real or is this just another haunted bathroom?
Ha ha ha!
Calder Rofae, if you made a haunted bathroom,
you have to invite us.
Ha ha ha! That's a dirty 20.
Dirty 20 fails.
I'm gonna use Indomitable, my last Indomitable,
and see if I can get out of it.
Not gonna do it.
Okay.
It's only 17.
39 psychic damage to start your turn.
Okay.
And-
This bathroom is so haunted.
Roll it for Honeysuckle as well.
You got a 22. Okay
You both fail again. You feel especially as you fail
You have to like clutch your head you feel this like ringing in your ears and you drop to your knees and you feel someone
rifling through your mind and you feel like
memories of your childhood coming to the forefront, you feel all of this
embarrassment and exclusion and just all of these feelings coming back that you've recently
grappled with but now you feel this very old reaction to them and you hear Jovier's voice
go,
Ah, a little brother.
I can relate. I am the youngest as well. I can relate.
I am the youngest as well.
I can't relate to you at all.
You killed your sister.
Yes, yes.
The perfect fairy queen.
Everything handed to her.
Such was her right for being spit out a few years before me.
Loved.
Purely for existing.
Yeah, yeah, and my brothers were born big, and I wasn't.
And I grappled with that for a long time.
But I grew up.
It doesn't sound like you ever did.
Oh, I grew up. I was a touch sentimental once. When I first
clawed my way to a crown, I thought I could use my new power to protect my sweet sister.
My sweet sister.
But we needed protecting from her.
She made the face soft.
The future
was ruinous with her at the helm.
The future was ruinous because you ruined it.
You only see what you want to see.
As you say that, there is a palpable doubt in the air.
But then she goes,
Fine.
You can't relate to me.
There are two kinds of little brothers, sidekicks and usurpers.
And I suspect you are the former.
Let us cut to the chase. Your
brother has been wounded."
You see in the darkness, swirling translucent figures, almost like ghosts locked in battle,
and you recognize the landscape. This is the ground battle down here and your troops are winning but you see that
Gregor has been wounded and dropped he is at the gates of Castle Winter and
Was struck by a ballista bolt head-on as he crashed the gates you see he is bleeding out
against the wall and
Jovier goes I
Can save him You needn't join my side. You just keep your sword at your side
while you're in here. Kali and Saul will never know. You feel her presence disappear and you are again alone in the darkness.
I feel like I listen to my breath echoing and then I start to feel Honey Suckles breath and his breath breathing with me makes me feel stronger.
And and I pick up my sword.
You completely cannot see in here, so you don't know that you can hit her.
But Honey Suckles earthquake is area of effect, so he wouldn't need to see.
So see if you can reroll that.
She forgot that I have another brother.
That's a six, babe.
Oh!
Oh, dude!
Oh my God.
So, yeah, you guys have been rolling fucking incredible
on these D6s.
Okay, so you're in this darkness here.
Go ahead and roll your damage for your earthquake
as you have Honeysuckle burrow into the ground.
If you do enough damage, she might lose her concentration
and then you would be out of this weird void
and then you'll be able to attack as well.
Come on Honeysuckle, om nom.
Nom nom nom.
Nom nom, baby, that's 76 damage.
Jesus.
Nom nom indeed.
My bro is hungry.
It's got to be impossible, right? She, okay. Oh, I guess if she has to, indeed. My bro is hungry. It's got to be impossible, right?
Oh, I guess if she halves it, done.
Okay, she can, so she halves it.
So if she rolls a nat 20 or a 19, she will pass.
Okay, okay.
I'm gonna roll in front of the table here.
Okay.
That is a 10. That's a 10.
Get down.
Honeysuckle burrows into the ground.
You don't need to see anything
because you feel the reverberations all around you.
And slowly, slowly, there are cracks
in the facade around you.
As the shadows break away, Jovier's hit for 72 damage,
takes a staggering amount of damage.
As you see a bunch of like the plinths blow off
the side of the Altar of Stars here.
And Kali, you're up here.
Saul, you're still up here on Licorice and Marigold.
And you guys see Calder appears out of the darkness here.
That's right.
That's right.
You forgot that Calder's from the north
where the nights are the longest.
He's not afraid of the dark.
That's right.
And Calder, you may now take your attacks.
Oh, all right.
Let's see what I get
17 dirty 20 and a 22 last to hit 17 does not hit so as soon as you appear
Jovier throws up her claws and blocks and holds on to you should have taken the deal
Why you didn't see yourself losing?
31 and you slash into her twice and do 31 damage.
She is starting to look extremely fucked up.
You see with each hit now, the blood is flowing.
She is no longer looking completely invincible.
Hell yeah.
After Calder's turn, Queen Jovir is going to see if,
she gets a legendary action no matter what,
but she's gonna see if she can get back her solar rift,
the thing that she did a ton of damage with
Before and she does that is a five. Yeah, she is going to
How far were you able to get away?
On licorice his fly speed is 80 feet. Okay, unfortunately really far. Yes, that is pretty
Far dude, the range on this is 150 feet. So I'm going to need
Super far dude the range on this is 150 feet. So I'm going to need
Constitution saving throws from you and licorice. Okay, and actually Kenna needs to do one as well because she's there with licorice. Oh
And a rose pretty good but fails because Joe veers save is so high right now put on your snow goggles, Kenna
14 for me. Okay, and a 23 for Licorice. Okay. Licorice unfortunately just fails.
Oh, oh my god.
Saul, it kind of didn't matter if you failed or you passed because you're at 1 HP.
Right.
The rest of you see Jovir reaches out a finger and causes one of the suns to brighten, emitting
a solar flare that shoots a beam down at Licorice
and Saul.
There is an explosion as Licorice whips through the air.
Kenna, Saul, and Licorice take 71 damage.
Kenna is knocked out.
Saul is knocked out.
What does that put Licorice at?
That puts at 31 HP. Okay, so Licorice stays up,
but is writhing and screeching through the air,
steaming, having just been set aflame.
Go ahead and give me a Dexterity saving throw for Licorice.
If he can hit a DC 20, he can hang on to you and Kenna
without thrashing you off in the in the aftershock
essentially okay another fucking three god damn it that's a ten okay oh Callie and Calder
you see in the distance explosion and then two falling bodies out of off of licorice okay so since we're closer to licorice
then jovier is can i cast featherfall on both sol and kenna yes you can okay so what that will
do that's not going to have them land perfectly safely but it will stop them from taking a death
saving fail as they hit the water they're not going to fall for max damage now.
I think I point at them and like a magician, Foster comes out of my sleeve.
Yeah, you see Foster flies out, shoots out some magic.
Saul, you feel like a favorable wind go under you as you think you're about to plummet to your death
and Callie, you watch as Kenna and Saul begin falling slower but
still very quickly and then out of sight into the raging waters below.
Okay, um, can I get on the head on the headset? Yeah, okay. So ground ground. Do you read
me? We've got like a big emergency. We need someone who could heal. I'm thinking. Ursia, a corralil. Gunk.
Okay, Ursia, have you got eyes on Gunk?
Yeah, he's right here, he's doing incredible, he must be so proud.
That's so good, can you-
He just keeps smashing into the water and making big waves go up and yelling ready to smite.
Oh my god, okay well I need him to heal Saul and Kenna, they've plummeted from the sky into some water
Oh, yeah, I'm sure you might you who are tuned into the water might have felt the impact
I did feel too unconscious bodies hit the water. Yeah
Unconscious though. They're not they haven't failed any death saves though. That's good. Yeah, that is really good
But we just really want to get alright. Let me reach out. Let me patch you in psychically to gong
Oh, really? I was kind of message. I was hoping that just you want to get hurt. Let me reach out. Let me patch you in psychically to gong
I was kind of as a joke. I was hoping that just you ready to save
Yeah, one of your daddies is fallen daddy. Yeah, ready to save
Ready to be pounded in the water
Lead you're ready to lead my son. You see the Knights of the Prawn table
take off into the water in search of their daddy.
That is Marigold's turn,
so Callie may act on that initiative.
Okay, we're just gonna go after Jovier.
Okay, go ahead and make your attacks.
She is completely visible now.
That honeysuckle has broken her concentration
This fear is gone and I'm mounted so I can attack with advantage. Hell. Yeah, okay
So this is yet your first time really getting to spend a full turn with the bonded marigold
So you feel starfire shoots up through her and goes up through your sword. Okay, let's do this girly.
That is a 34, a 31 and a 35.
Jesus.
Because I've got my magic weapon going.
Okay, yeah, you just do a fly by on Marigold.
Go ahead and do you wanna apply any kind of smites or anything?
Yeah, I'm gonna do two highest level by using up casting
and then I've got got third. Okay, great
Okay, that is 120
Christ
Callie as you slash into her you see she has two forms of herself, right?
She's got this one that is like a a summeradrin and one that is a winter eladrin.
They're like these two separated sides
and she's switching faces as she's casting different spells
like the sun spells or the moon spells.
She switches back between the two of them.
As you slash into her, you see her form
begins to become like incorporeal
and starts to warp and change
and the two sides are becoming combined.
This is such a mind fuck to be fighting
a winter and summer Aladdin.
Yeah.
Mommy, Cyra, no focus.
And then I'm gonna let Marigold attack.
Okay, yeah.
And I'm gonna give her,
I have a second level smite I can give her.
Okay, yeah, you use Marigold's ability
to use her reaction to fill her claws with the power of your Smites.
She takes two claw attacks and bites in.
Yeah, I think I like breathe on her claws.
Ooh.
Meteor Witch, Cast Wyrm Storm.
Does 23 or a 30 or 26 hit?
Yeah, all three hit.
He, he, he, he.
That is 80 damage from Mirigold. You are tearing her apart. She is
starting to look very mortal. She's getting desperate, pulling at the heavens, trying to
destroy the Feywild so that she can kill you right now. As she looks very mortal, I think I look at her and I'm like, this is your true face. Ooh.
She looks scared.
After Kalaepi and Marigold's turn, that would typically be aerial warfare, but we don't
have to waste a ton of time on that.
You guys are low on health.
Jovier's low on health.
Neither side is going to go from deadlocked to winning in time.
The air battle is tied.
Those allies aren't going to be able to get to Saul to save him. But you guys could use the dragon hero point to
give ground support for the ground battle because that's ultimately what's important.
Yeah. Yeah, yeah. We need the ground to get to Saul and Kenna. So yeah.
So you need to win the next ground battle. So go ahead and roll a D6 to see if you can
get the dragons back.
Oh, come on, come on, come on.
That's a five.
Oh, man, I love playing with D6s.
There's so many less numbers to fuck us over.
There's so many pretty good numbers on a D6.
Play weather's so popular.
OK, so air battles pretty much tied,
but they're able to get enough of an advantage
that they can lose some of the dragons.
You see Shiver Blight and Big Bev come down
and provide air cover.
Your ground battle roll will now add plus two.
Next in the initiative is Kenna, who has disappeared.
We don't know what's happening to her.
We will go to the ground battle.
If you win this, that will allow your NPCs to come into play.
So Gunk can go look for Saul and Kenna.
Did we use a Coralow last time?
No.
Didn't, a Coralow is not, yeah.
Ooh, speaking of a Coralow, can Saul as he's falling
be like, wave mommy, if I ever meant anything to you,
if there was ever a chance.
Oh!
Okay, it's up to me to roll now, right?
So that's a one.
The knights and giants and automatons do not recharge.
Do not recharge.
Okay.
And do we use Jane of Bronzebeard?
Do we need to see if that recharges?
We have to recharge that.
You have to recharge that.
So you have to see if you get a five or a six.
All right, I'm gonna, there we go.
Let's get Jane of Dice.
Oh, that's a one.
Okay.
All right.
All right.
So we're gonna roll D6s.
You got a plus two.
They've got a minus two
So they need to read quite good
The ground troops are losing here. Your guys are
Storming the castle taking over castle winter here
What did you get? I rolled a five. I got a so that's seven total
Two over here, which is a zero
They fully like a Coralill brings a great wave
that like collapses the castle.
Like the ground battle is over.
You hear cries going up of victory.
On that initiative, on that ground initiative,
you can have a ground ally help.
So, a Coralill will command Gunk,
or will just suggest a Gunk. Gunk is a paladin, so. A paladin. A Coralil will command gunk, or will just suggest a gunk.
Gunk is a paladin, so.
A paladin.
A Coralil.
Release the gunk stats.
A Coralil is going to do a perception check with advantage
to try to find you guys in the water.
Okay.
Natural 20.
Yes!
Oh my god.
It was meant to be.
She knows her lover's voice.
Okay, so what do you think Sala's thinking in this moment Yes! Oh my god. It was meant to be. She knows her lover's voice.
Okay, so what do you think Saul is thinking in this moment as he, I'll say like, you
feel yourself falling, but you look over to the land, you see that you guys are winning
the fight, you see in the air that Albin and the dragons and everybody are starting to
take over the Wyverns.
What is Saul thinking in these last moments?
I think Saul is terrified at first, but then as he looks around and sees the shape of the
battlefield, he kind of smiles and knows that even without him, he's done everything he
can and everyone has this well in hand.
This might be the end of Saul, but it's not the end of Duck Team, it's not the end of
the world. So he closes his eyes and a small smile hits his face
as he lands in the water.
So you hit the water.
Everything goes black.
A moment later, you feel
fishy hands under you.
You feel someone casting a healing spell on you. I'm gonna cast Mass Cure Wounds on you and Kenna. You pop up with 14 HP, You look up and you see this beautiful giant woman, hair of seaweed,
giant fish face, giant fish bottom. She is holding you up over the water as you're
prone lying there. You see Gunk is holding up Kenna. Kenna has just come to,
ah, ah, like back saw from Gunk.
Oh, sorry Gunk, I forgot you.
You grew up.
A Coral-O looks at you, Saul, and goes,
oh, thank God, you're all right.
No, don't thank God.
Thank you.
A Coral-O brings him a kiss.
Wow, it is so hot. It is so hot.
I kiss her with all the tongue I have.
Holy shit.
Correlo, this giant, primordial giant,
and Saul start making out on the battlefield.
My goodness.
We thought he could pull a crown.
Turns out, crown pulled him.
Yeah, seriously.
So Saul stabilizes. Okay. He's still good. Turns out, crown pulled in. Yeah, seriously.
So, Saul stabilizes.
Okay.
He's still good.
He more than stabilizes, brother.
He more than stabilizes.
He more than stabilizes.
He's elevated.
Freaking babalized.
At the top of the round, my god,
Queen Jovir is so desperate.
She's going to cast Firestorm, reaches her hand out
and has another one of the suns just fucking explodes
and you just see-
Stop doing that!
Just star fire, she's like,
it's fine, I can control it, I can control it!
Like you were complaining about a god in outer space
creating trouble, you're ruining outer space.
I can defeat him.
You'll be lost without me.
All of these celestial bodies are just rubble to you now.
So I need deck saving throws from all of the serpents.
Oh, man.
And all of their riders, but not Kenna or Saul who are currently in the water.
Oh, yeah.
24 for uh
honeysuckle. That's a nine. Okay. Marigold got a thirteen
only. Okay. Everyone who got lower than a twenty-four takes
thirty-eight damage. Oh. Licorice had 31 hit points.
Licorice is shot out of the sky by a fireball of like a
broken off piece of a star and spirals into the water below.
There is a seismic crash as Licorice explodes into the water.
I'm also down.
Calder drops.
Saul, that is your turn.
You're down in the water.
You kind of can't realistically get to anybody.
Maybe you can get to Licorice.
How far away is Licorice?
I can run on water. It's to Licorice. How far away is Licorice? I can run on water.
It's a Licorice.
Oh, okay.
Give me a, I'll say 30 feet away plus a D100.
Okay.
That's 89.
He is 89.
So he is 90 feet away from you in the water.
With a dash action and my ability to move on water, I can go 110 feet.
Yes, you can.
Okay.
I grab a potion from Kenna,
and I deliver it into the mouth of Licorice
with a bonus action.
Okay, yeah.
Saul, you rush along the water.
You get down from Acorilil's arms.
Acorilil lets you know, I feel him on the water.
He's right in the direction where the giant serpent
exploded into the water.
Thank you, babe, I love your mind.
Yes, maybe we'll do it again sometime.
Just so you know, that was sex for me.
Awesome.
Oh.
Damn, Saul's had sex twice on this trip.
Yeah, Saul's had weird water sex twice.
Yeah, you guys did a weird water dance as you kissed.
Yeah, yeah.
Saul's mouth is full of eggs.
Yeah.
You rush along the surface of the water.
You see Licorice has just hit the water, has taken a death saving fail because he couldn't get Featherfall and is just labored breathing and beginning to sink.
As you go over, you put your hands on him, you're not strong enough to keep him up, he's
sinking, sinking, you rush along his scales, rush along his scales, he's barely breathing
but you find his mouth, you put a potion in, he gets 4d4 plus 4, so he just barely springs back to life.
Just, hang in there. It all started with you. You're the egg that this all began with.
You can't die. Not here, not now.
Just sort of lets out a little hiss. You see bubbles come out of his mouth.
Barely able to move, but gets you on top of the scales so you're mounted again
and then surfaces on the water and just begins gliding towards like the ground
battle slash towards where your friends are and where his his sister and brother
are okay um is my earpiece still working didn't get too much water in it
earpiece is still working great I touch my earpiece it working? Didn't get too much water in it. Earpiece is still working. Great. I touch my earpiece.
It goes a little too far into my ear.
Static in my ear.
Oh, what is that?
This is Saul.
Ken and I aren't OK.
Oh, thank God.
Yeah, we're back in the fight.
What do we need?
What can I do?
Oh, Saul, can you check on my brother?
Can you see Gregor down there?
Gregor, Gregor.
Can I scan?
Can I do a perception check? Yeah, go ahead. And I'll say you're on my brother? Can you see Gregor down there? Gregor, Gregor. Can I scan? Can I do a perception check?
Yeah, go ahead and I'll say you're on Licorice.
Licorice has enough movement to get to the land.
Go ahead and give me a perception check with advantage.
Licorice perception is plus 16, so I'll use that.
That's okay.
Yay!
Jesus Christ.
Okay, so what is that total?
That's going to be a 25.
Jesus. Okay, yeah. So, Licorice, I'll is that total? Not bad. That's gonna be a 25. Jesus, okay, yeah.
So, Licorice, I'll say you guys swoop down, you pick up Kenna, Gunk tosses Kenna to you.
Happy to help!
Good luck, Dad!
Thank you, my son!
Kenna joins you on the back of Licorice.
You guys fly over to, now there's like rallying cries and stuff going up,
and you do see that there are a few soldiers, It looks like Gawain and Gregor got separated
during the fight.
Otherwise Gawain would be trying to help Gregor.
But there are sort of lesser like knights and squires
trying to help out Gregor who is bleeding out.
I'm gonna say he's had two death saves.
Oh man.
So if he fails and rolls a one or he rolls a one twice,
he's dead, but otherwise he can be saved.
Okay. One pass, one fail. otherwise he can be saved. Okay.
One pass, one fail, Gregor is still bleeding.
Okay.
Is this Silver Lily heading out to Twin Dingus?
Silver Lily heading to Twin Dingus.
What?
You guys are Twin Dingus, we're Silver Lily,
it's that simple.
What is that?
Gregor is Twin, we went over the code.
Sorry, I forgot.
Silver, okay, okay, Silver Surfin'. Okay, actually that makes sense. Did I not tell everyone the code. Sorry, I forgot. Silver, okay, okay, silver serpent.
Okay, actually, that makes sense.
Did I not tell everyone the code?
I'm sorry, it's like mid battle, my brain is frazzled.
It's a new thing, we're throwing it at the end here.
I know, we didn't talk about it during the battle,
but we did, I handed out the packet.
Okay, we're going.
I was just shrouded in darkness.
Yeah.
As you guys are saying that,
Kenna's gonna jump down, feed Gregor a potion. You see he kicks up, and the ballista saying that Kenna's gonna jump down feed Greg or a potion
Oh, you see he kicks up and the ballista bolt that was in him as the skin around the wound begins to heal it
Just shoots out. Oh
It hurts in like my fucking nards dude that sounded hilarious
Let me do a quick Nard check I bop him him. You bop him, he goes back down,
he starts making death saves now.
No!
Okay, so Saul and Kenna have saved Gregor down here.
They are down in the ground battle
that is currently being won.
You see the enemy is fleeing.
Okay.
After Saul's turn, Queen Jovee'r is going to take
a legendary action
and attack Calder with advantage.
Disadvantage.
Disadvantage, why?
He's got the Displacer Scarf.
Yeah.
He does have the Displacer Scarf,
so this will be flat because he's prone and out.
Yeah, okay, so we'll roll flat.
21's still gonna hit.
I don't get the three quarter cover from the serpent
if I'm knocked down.
Let's do this.
Go ahead and roll a deck saving throw
for Honeysuckle to keep you on his back
while you fall unconscious.
DC 20.
23.
23 passes.
Okay. Yes.
You do get some cover and that stops her from hitting you.
Honeysuckle takes the hit for you
Yes, as well as the
Displacer patch. Yes. Yeah between the displacer patch and Honeysuckle your friends protect you from
Possibly her being able to kill you in a couple rounds of initiative. After that
That is your turn Calder. Go ahead and give me a death saving throw
It's an 11. 11 passes.
Okay, okay.
You start to stabilize.
You feel honeysuckle underneath you still fighting.
You can still fight.
For Calder's turn that is marigold and cali-
Well isn't it honeysuckle's turn?
Oh.
Honey, can honeysuckle?
Oh yeah, does honeysuckle get to go?
And then honeysuckle still gets to act.
Yeah.
Alright.
Let's see if this earthquake comes back.
Four, no.
But we're gonna bite, slam, and tail.
Okay. Why not?
Bite, slam, and tail, my favorite menu option
at Red Lobster.
That's a nat 20 on the bite.
Wow.
Nat 20, 34, 24.
All three hit.
74 damage.
Honeysuckle, finish Queen Jovier.
Woo!
Oh my god.
So Calder, you are knocked out,
but you have enough of a connection to Honeysuckle
that as he makes the final attack on Queen Jovier,
you begin to come to hazy-eyed.
I'll say you're at one HP.
Oh, awesome.
All right, I guess I imagine Honeysuckle's like,
almost like an earthquake shattering call,
rumbles and wakes me up.
And I want to stand up shakily
and call to the other serpents and to Kali and Sol
so we can all chomp on this crown together.
I'll take a bite of a crown too.
Yeah.
Let's do it.
Okay.
Calder also wants to actually eat the crown.
Yeah, I'm gonna take one bite.
I'm gonna take one bite.
You guys are gonna take a bite?
Okay.
All six of us are gonna take a bite.
All right.
You see, Honeysuckle does a vicious bite
that breaks Jovier's body.
You see her floating and just looking dead-eyed, reaching up and trying to use
her power, but she's not strong enough. You see it begins to drain her as she's trying to cast
high level spells. She's withering away, withering away. All three serpents fly up into the sky.
They whip around to face the crown. You see a ball of lightning forms in Licorice's mouth, one of gravitational waves forms in honeysuckles, and starfire forms in marigold.
They dive bomb down to the crown and release their magic in a three pronged attack. As
the breath weapons converge, you see at the point of impact, there is a seismic explosion.
Ripples of power shoot out into the sky as the entire planet
trembles. The sky and the seas are chaos after Jovir has warped the gravity of the planet
and it gets even more unstable as the all-powerful crown loses its bearer, loses its form. You see the moment this wild raw power hits the atmosphere
and it stops being attuned to someone, it sends another shockwave of power around the
battlefield. At first blowing you all back, but after a moment pulling you all in. You
see the other combatants on the ground and the ones in the air begin floating, many of them in random directions,
but the more magical beings are being drawn to this power. You see the Serpents, the young Stag,
Zunark, Jaina, Trashcan, the Primordial Giants some of like the dragons. You even see Syrah with Triss too desperately clinging to her, is being like pulled towards
it, but she's still mostly out and she just looks up at you Callie and goes like,
My god, Callie, what's happening?
Just hang on, it will be okay.
I say not knowing. Where the crown was there is now a black hole of energy with
Sunfire whipping around the outside of it. You look up in the sky and see
meteors falling, the temperature rises and drops wildly. The landscape of the
Fae is radically changing. If not for the primordial giant lords and their mastery over the elements
You'd already be dead. This is
Apocalyptic you see garage is trying to keep the wind from blowing everybody together
But also there's kind of no gravity so people are just floating away
the only thing keeping you guys here is raw magic and the fact that the crown and the powers
essentially kind of judging you it's almost like sentient and it's pulling
you and then rejecting other people so you see other people just kind of like
flying off some of the you know primordial giants and stuff like a core
little like looks at it kind of tempted there's a few people that look like they
might go in and try to grab it you see the young stag looks at the power.
It looks like a dying star in the middle of the battlefield and goes,
This is it. This is what we need to bring your queen back, right?
Well, I thought...
I thought we could use it to resurrect Cirilla, but...
She would not want to save her life at the expense of the Fae.
This needs to be used to stabilize the realm.
Okay. Can we all do it together if we spread it out? to save her life at the expense of the Fae. This needs to be used to stabilize the realm.
Okay.
Can we all do it together? If we spread it out, maybe it can't corrupt us. I don't know.
Yeah, all this raw magic floating here, absolutely immense. And Garrosh goes,
we can definitely all help as best we can. We need a powerful spell. We need
a wish and we need someone to cast it.
I don't... I don't have a spell slot for that. I don't know that spell, I'm sorry. What about you?
I don't know how the raw magic will work, but the crown only amplified what was already there. If
there's anyone here with knowledge of Arcana and a strong constitution, they may be our only hope.
I nod and my eyes go big and water as I look at Sol and Callie.
You've got this.
Is this gonna be a check? Can I give him guidance?
It is gonna be a check.
Okay. Yeah, I'll give Calder guidance.
And I'll give him an inspiration.
So, Calder, by taking this on, you are essentially trying to take this raw
magic and channel it this is not something that can be done lightly and
this is something that could kill you if you fail your Constitution saving throw
here after you make your Constitution saving throw you will then make an
arcana check to see if you can cast a spell that is much higher than you are typically prepared to do.
Okay.
This is all Calder ever actually wanted.
It was for people to trust him.
To put their fate in his hands.
So it is time for him to step up.
And he steps forward.
Calder, you reach forward, you see the tendrils whip around you.
They reach out and begin climbing up your wrist and then suddenly yank you into the
strange swirl here.
You guys see Calder starts to be absorbed by this like black hole in the middle.
And as it absorbs you Calder you feel an
Overwhelming sense of power you get the rush from the feeling that you'd normally get by casting a spell
But it just keeps coming and coming and coming overflowing overwhelming you go ahead and give me a constitution saving throw
Oh, man, thank God. I'm wearing a cloud cup
Oh man, thank God I'm wearing a cloud cup. Ha ha ha!
Ooh yeah, it's a 26.
26, okay.
You guys watch from the outside as Calder doubles over,
but then rears back and alights with flame and energy.
Calder, this is unstable,
but you feel that you have enough control
to cast one ninth level spell,
one wish.
The only problem is this is elemental magic,
born of the sun and the moon.
And since moonlight is a reflection of the sun,
the energies aren't all that different.
It's fire.
Calder, you need to conjure a spark
in order to light this spell.
I need Calder to go ahead and give me a DC 20 Arcana check.
So every time Calder has tried to conjure fire before, he's just been thinking flame,
heat, fire, be there, be warm.
And now he's thinking he's from the frigid north he's from the ice knife and
Maybe he just has to think about
the coldest nights that he's ever huddled up with his brothers
Because that was when they got warm by the fire, so he thinks about being cold
Okay, so far that's a ten being cold. Okay.
So far that's a 10.
Okay.
Okay.
All right.
So you have a D4 and then a bardic.
And a D10.
All right.
I'll use my bardic first.
Okay.
That's a 10, baby.
Okay.
Thank you, Callie.
Okay.
So you guys may make a wish.
What do we wish for?
Callie, you're the one that's always had a wish for the Feywild.
Yeah.
I mean, the Feywild's really changed over the past couple minutes, so I feel like the
wish I would have would be to put it back the way it was before Jovier did what she did.
This is a crazy idea and feel free to shoot it down, but what if we let Foster make the
wish?
He speaks for the wild.
Foster, what would you wish? down and then looks at the serpents and sort of gestures out to all of the humanoids.
Foster doesn't speak this in any language, but you just understand what he'd like.
He'd like to see the spirit of the beastlands revived, but for humanoids to be able to thrive here for there to be
a world where the wild and society could coexist.
Yeah, I think that's what I was always getting at. So yeah.
Unpredictably beautiful.
Also, it'd be nice to put all the meteors back into the sky.
Calder clicks his fingers and makes a tiny flame like a lighter in his hand.
Ow! Fuck that's hot!
Careful, we're gonna start calling you Zippo.
Ow! Fuck that's hot! Careful, we're gonna start calling you Zippo.
As he retracts his hand, you see that the fire explodes out into millions of magical particles.
They look like glowing wisps. There is a never-ending cascade of them floating around you here. But you see others float up to the sky and begin to link together, creating a protective
barrier between the planets and the astronomical havoc that is happening beyond.
And you see, as the barrier stabilizes, there is a calm that washes over the land here. The ocean stops moving, the
mountains stop collapsing, and everyone remains floating midair instead of like
flying off in all directions. You look all around you and with this emanating
magic you enter a sort of hive mind and can see the entire planet. You see that it has been wrecked by this
battle. Not just this fight but the fights before it. Towns were raided, most
of the autumn court was abandoned, the summer court was under siege, and even
before that the power of the crowns had divided the continents into different
forever seasons that have been warped now a few times over.
This planet has been in desperate need of saving for a while now.
You see the magical particles begin glowing and fusing into the serpent's scales.
They glow with ancient power.
We're gonna go down the line. Calder, how how does honeysuckle heal the fey with his power? I guess just like a
plow needs to go through a field to turn it over and bring
new soil. Yeah. A honeysuckle will will do a nice om nom nom
but like near the surface of everything. Yeah. So, Honeysuckle goes around, nom, nom, nom,
creates fresh soil
where life can grow again.
Saul, how does Licorice heal the Feywild with his power?
Ooh, I think that
Licorice flies up into the sky
and you see the moonlight glinting off of his scales.
And then he dives down into the ocean
and swims up a tributary and becomes all the rivers.
And you see them glinting with this silver light
as they're purified and this renewed magical purity
and chaos just is delivered throughout the Feywild.
Beautiful, yeah, you see all the rivers are restored,
all this water, you see where Jovir had in the past broken the continent the land grows back up and new beautiful streams and lakes appear and a Corilla looks impressed.
You like that?
Yeah, I like it a lot actually.
Maybe like another maybe we can go check him out.
Maybe we check out like a lake or whatever
You've been to a swamp before and you're like an ocean gal. It's been a minute. I wouldn't mind
Callie how does marigold heal the fae with her power?
Um, I think marigold is just gonna do a nice controlled burn of the things that no longer serve the face I think she's gonna go around and the things that need to be cleared away for new things to grow right on is what she's
Gonna just gently burn away. Yeah, and let those fertile ashes
Become something great. Yeah, so
Marigold goes around and I'll say maybe we reverse the order a little bit
So marigold goes first and kind of
burns away all the things that need to be burned away and then honeysuckle goes through and brings
up the new soil and then licorice waters it and you guys see lush landscapes below you.
Giant trees spring out of the ground as quick as the serpents fly over them creating forests
and rivers and lakes and mountains.
It looks like a combination of the Feywild
and the Beastlands.
You see giant beasts start rearing their heads.
Saul kicks a basilisk.
Yeah.
Go ahead and give me a constitution
so I can throw a real quick.
I know.
This is 16.
Okay, you pass.
Oh, I got it.
Saul knocks out the basilisk.
But you guys see that, hey,
cities as well and towns that had been raised by raiders in the past few months suddenly become
incorporated into the natural landscape. You see like beautiful tree cities and you also see
new settlements and towns. And you guys look around after having taken this strange magical trip around the Feywild atop the Serpents.
The planet looks safe now, but you look up into the sky and see that it is blank.
There is this barrier of magic that is protecting the planet from the night sky.
So you've got this beautiful landscape, but no sky.
Oh, I look at the serpents.
Another skyless night.
Thought I'd seen all those I would.
It might be time for you three to return to your mom.
Oh, wait a minute.
I pull out the vial.
Can I inspect it?
Has it changed?
Does it look different?
It looks like a little galaxy in a vial.
Oh. Yeah changed it look different. It looks like a little galaxy in a vial. Oh
I think swag gave this to me in our vision, but I think I think now is the time to open it
Pop that up. Let's see what's in there. Um, I'm gonna
Hold it out pretty far. Okay. Yeah, not sure what's gonna happen and Uh and I uncork it. Uh you uncork it and you see stars begin pouring out and the serpents look like they're ready to go on a trip.
Wow. There's a lot of space out there and a lot of threats and
we need you to be on the lookout. Can you do that for us?"
You see Licorice turns to you Saul, gives you a little nod. See Honey Suggle, rum rum
rum. Nuzzles into Calder.
And knock heads with him.
Marigold wraps around Saira and Calliope.
I think that's fine. I'll let them. They've had the whole story together. She can just wrap around.
You see, as you try to leave to just give her a moment with Saira, grabs you and pulls you in next to Saira and wraps you both around.
And you see Foster hops on top of the serpent and goes,
See Ollie joins him, say, essentially, one last ride.
Okay, yeah.
Let's see them off.
Let's do it.
I think before it all ends, I do just want to say a special goodbye though to Licorice,
because that's who I started everything with.
Yeah.
So I think I just want to hug him around his neck and just say thank you for starting me on this really unexpected journey.
Liquorish wraps around you and three of you take off.
Kenna on the back of Honeysuckle as well and Cyrus there on the back of Marigold.
You guys leap up into the sky
and crash through the barrier.
And you see you are covered in protective magic
that lets you travel beyond the planet.
Out here you see asteroids and dead stars
and chaos from Juvir's careless magic.
But as Saul's vial leaks into the atmosphere,
you see the sky of the beastlands takes over and you see this giant
Galactic swag and using his monk abilities begins to move at light speed shuffling the sky
Placing stars and moons and planets back in their proper place
Now that's knitting
You see galactic swag gives you a wink Saul. You guys see the planet of
Bohemia below you the Feywild material plane and Shadowfell all glowing and swirling with green
and blue and black energy and beyond it you see this endless sea of stars and now an eerie calm sets in as everything settles.
And as it does, you see a constellation take shape, that of the Serpent Queen.
And you see the Serpent Queen looks out at all of you and goes, thank you for bringing
them home.
We wouldn't be here without them.
Honestly, they brought themselves home.
You've got quite spirited children.
Yeah.
Rar, rar, rar.
You see the serpent queen looks proudly
at all of her children.
The prophecy has unfolded.
Perhaps not in the way we originally thought.
But the wild lives on.
Come, my children.
It is time to go.
You see...
Marigold,
honeysuckle,
and licorice.
Glow with starfire.
Give you guys all little head bumps.
You see...
Syrah is completely exhausted exhausted but has come to enough and is
crying as she sees
Marigold start to become incorporeal
but she was alone before and
Now she has her sister again. So you see she
Pets marigold with one hand and holds Callie's hand with the other. She's gonna be forever in the sky whenever you want to look at her.
And I'm not going anywhere.
Sarah just goes, shut up, you poetic idiot.
And just brings you in and gives you a hug and cries.
I hug wrestle her.
Yeah, you guys start wrestling.
And you see they disappear briefly and then incorporate into the night sky behind the
serpent queen.
As they disappear, I cast feather fall so that we fall from outer space.
Yeah.
Okay.
So you guys, as you guys begin to fall back, you hear the Serpent Queen goes,
And one last thing.
Oberon was aware of the risk of becoming involved in mortal affairs.
He has asked me to honor his debts.
And Calli, you guys are in the void of space here, there's no air, but you suddenly feel
a soft wind and smell the scent of space here. There's no air, but you suddenly feel a soft wind and
Smell the scent of spearmint and tea leaves and you see your mother
Oliana a living constellation
appears before you
That's her do you smell it?
Saira nods you see your mother runs over and gives you guys a hug and she feels she feels real she goes my girls I
Didn't think I'd ever see you again. Yeah, I didn't think I'd see you either
But this is gonna be goodbye, right? I
Yeah, you see you feel at peace
as you ask that you look in your mother's eyes and
Usually she'd have this kind of especially in the last
You know decade of her life or so. She always had kind of a far-off look like she was
Thinking of of somewhere else. She was seeing future so she could never truly live in the moment
but as you ask that you see she is
present right now for the first time.
And she goes, I don't know.
I finally don't know.
Yes, yes, I think so.
And she nods excitedly.
I have no idea what will happen next.
I have no idea.
And I'm so excited. She hugs you both in tight and touches both your shoulders and goes, I spent seen all the paths to withering.
But now I get to watch you bloom.
Thank you, Kaleibi.
Thank you, Saira.
I'll miss you a lot.
I'll miss you, my dear.
Alright, well, Saira, I guess it's time to get blooming.
You see,
Saira goes, yeah, I guess it's
time to get blooming.
Oh Saira, just let it out.
Your lip is trembling.
Fucking fine!
She just starts crying, she goes, I love you, I love you, I love you,
brings you, brings you both in,
and your mother goes,
goodbye my loves. I hope we can see each other again someday
Do you think we might?
Does the universe work like that?
You see chance
she looks around at all of the endless stars and
Your mother
shakes her head and goes,
I can't be sure anymore, but I think so.
Okay, well, we'll give you a good show until then.
She smiles and you see Swag, the Serpent Queen,
and only Anna walk off into the stars and you all begin floating back to Bohemia
Under the watchful gaze of the serpent queen reunited with her children You're not a monster
No matter what you've heard
You're everything I dreamed you'd be
A miracle to me
They don't get to tell you what you're worth
Darling what you're worth Darling, you're native to the night
So take these wings I gave you and take flight
Don't ever be ashamed of your claws, your bite, your strength
They don't get to tell you who you are
Honey, don't ever change a thing
ever change a thing
your fire breath your many heads
your poison serpents sting
just because they're afraid
doesn't mean that you have strayed
they don't even get to have a say
I can make you strong and brave, but you're a possibility
They don't get to tell you what to do And with You and me, we know just what we're worth.
And with that, we will cut to one year later.
Oh, Saul, what have you been doing one year after the adventure?
Wow.
Well, I think for the past year, I've probably just been traveling around with
Duck Team as much as we're allowed to, seeing places we didn't get to see. I think I probably
have been helping Albin out by essentially going across the world and looking for talented youths
that maybe don't have a chance or grew up in a place
like the water park without parents or opportunity.
And I recruit them and I take them to Albee's Academy.
Yeah.
So we catch up with Saul,
who is the adjunct professor of martial arts
at Albee's Academy in Esri.
It is a publicly funded school that offers education
and housing to the youth around Bohemia.
And Saul, you stand in front of a classroom
of excited students, many of whom you recognize
as the little animal pals from the water park.
What do you think you're teaching them today?
I think I, they're all excitedly talking in the classroom
and then I back flip in through the door.
Cool teacher.
And land on the desk and say, listen up.
You may not be the most magically talented,
but there's magic in all of us.
There is a magic you can harness, but to harness it,
you can't use your strength.
You have to use your mind.
You have to find the inner focus.
And that is why today we're going to be making pot holders.
See, all of the kids look really confused, then really excited,
then really confused again and then really excited.
And they all start freaking out about getting to make pot holders.
There's a portrait of Alvin up in the room.
Yeah, Alvin's up there.
You see, he looks like surprised that you took the picture and it's just a really bad picture of him.
I had the same thought, that he looks confused in the picture.
He moved when they took it and they hung it up anyway.
But yeah, Albin's been teaching other classes and you've been teaching this one.
You see as you finish up the class, you see the students file out,
but as they do you see a dwarven knight from Iron Deep
enters. You see she wears a tabard with a hammer on it over her plate mail.
So, Bufo, it's about time I tracked you down.
Sir Ironborn. Yeah, it is me. You see she removes her helm, but I'm actually going by Sir Ketta Kruggen now. And yes, and yes I am a knight. And yes, I do have a girlfriend now.
Cheer for her class!
You see the kids cheer.
They're all holding pot holders so it's really muffled now.
They take notes.
This is how you do it, huh?
This was my first student.
You see they all look really excited to grow up to be Kenna.
Yeah, you see Kenna looks really strong.
Has been training hard this past year and looks like a strong warrior.
What brings you here?
It's been some word from Osmodea that some cultists are trying to bring in some rogue
gods and putting together a team.
I slap my hand on her pauldron and say, say the word.
They really don't need me around here.
There's like a lot of other teachers that are way more qualified.
She looks around at you forcing all these kids to make potholders.
And she goes like, all right, we can teleport to the next place.
My girlfriend is a wizard.
She gave me a spell scroll because she's my girlfriend.
That's cool as hell.
Yeah.
You see, Kenna brings you in, then opens up a scroll and you disappear as you hear Albin
go, Saul, Saul, wait, are you?
You need to tell us if you're going to be absent.
Put on a movie.
God damn it's all right everyone. We're watching, I don't know.
Babe.
We're gonna watch Babe 2 Pig in the City.
Oh the kids freak out, they're so excited.
It's so tragic, the kids are gonna be crying.
Oh shit.
And then we cut to Calder.
What are you doing one year after the adventure?
Okay, so I think Calder left his hometown
with a chip on his shoulder,
but now he's coming back having nothing to prove.
And he moved into Boris Frigg's lake house.
Oh, so sick.
And he's been slowly but surely fixing it back up,
using his hands, ice skating on the
lake in the morning.
Coach Gordon Bombay style at the end of Mighty Ducks.
So you are out on the deck of Boris Frigg's lake house.
You're out here with your brothers, you're sharing a beer.
They all kind of toast to you.
It's been a year now.
Things are
less weird with Gawain now. You see Gregor is kind of coming to his own as the Ranger General and Gawain's
you know taking a bit of an ego check and is learning to take orders and whatnot. So you guys are all
hanging out and just kind of messing around with each other and Gregor goes
You still talking to that girl, Tris too, or?
Hey, don't call her that girl.
That's my girlfriend.
Well, she doesn't call herself my girlfriend,
but that's what I call her to you guys
and not in front of her.
Cause she doesn't like labels, asshole.
Gregor just goes, you know, I know you don't want to take my advice or
anything but maybe I don't know if she's the one is is all insane like I don't know if she's the one.
Dude now you sound like her come on. As you guys are talking about your situationship with Triss too.
Your long-distance situationship between the two
because she lives in the Feywild.
But I live right near the gate.
Yeah, you do live right near the gate.
Every once in a while she comes and visits
and just brings so much drama to the Ice Knight.
She's actually very popular because the Feywild
has such a higher capacity for drama
than the Material Plane. Yeah, we do.
Yeah, yeah, she than the material plane. Yeah, we do.
Yeah, yeah.
She brings the ice tea.
Yeah.
So you guys are enjoying this night, and then you suddenly see two figures appear out on
the ice.
Calder!
Hey, Calder!
We got rogue gods!
Calder!
What?
Yeah.
What?
Hey, come up here! I put a team together. Okay, alright. You see? Oh! our rogue gods! Called her! What? Yeah. What?
Yeah.
Hey, come up here!
Come up here!
Okay, alright.
You see?
Oh!
Yep, they walk the long way.
This isn't perfectly exact.
Sorry, my girlfriend, you know.
Shit, I was gonna shovel down there.
Did you say girlfriend?
Yeah, yeah.
Sorry, I don't...
Bring it in, sir!
Oh my god.
Yeah, I guess we've all got girlfriends now, huh?
Damn, do we all have girlfriends?
Yeah, we all might have girlfriends.
Kena comes in, gives you guys a hug, and she looks up at you, called her, and goes,
Sorry to disturb you, but we're putting a team together.
There's rumors that cultists are trying to summon one of the rogue gods,
and we're wondering if you were interested in getting the old team back together.
Wow, yeah, yeah. I just have to check with my girlfriend. You know what? No.
She wouldn't check with me. By the way, are you and your girlfriend totally monogamous or is it like a monogamish thing?
We're just, yeah, we're monogamous, but you know, whatever you're into.
I'm gonna come with you guys for sure. You see, your brothers cheers you,
kind of mess up your hair, send you along,
and you guys teleport away.
No parties while I'm gone.
Yeah.
You see, Gregor is already taking the door off
to make it a beer pong table.
No, I just fixed that.
And then we are going to cut to the Feywild, where things look quite different than they did a year ago.
This has been a time of rebuilding.
There is a new Fey Republic.
Some of our old friends have become representatives, including Coralil, Basalt, Garrosh, Zunark, the young Stag.
The automatons were able to collect the shattered pieces of the old crown and
gained their autonomy and are traveling with bare lane, the new leaders have worked to
continue what you and the serpent started, sustainable cities that incorporate nature
while also protecting humanoids from the beasts that inhabit the forests. Syra Igni has sort of redirected her anger into a passion and is now a traveling ambassador
that works on deals between beasts and humanoids after all of her experience with Marigold.
But today she is visiting her sister Kaliope.
And Kaliope, what are you doing?
So obviously I think I've spent the past year, I've stayed in the Feywild and I think that,
you know, one of my priorities has been like creating a new relationship with Syrah, you
know, outside of the sibling dynamics that Mother put on us.
But actually I think that what Calliope's done is she started a traveling theater troupe that traverses
the Feywild with a caravan of wagons, telling stories of the Material Plane and the three
unexpected heroes, Cole De Kilde, Sol Buffau, and Maeve Haypenny.
Wow.
Maeve Heypenny being the Aladdin that tragically died
in the final battle.
Wow.
With Jovier.
Okay.
So I think I'm like backstage,
I'm like whipping everyone up ready for a show.
I'm like pointing at someone being like,
okay, your soul, your soul tonight.
All right, yeah. Alright, yeah.
Okay, yeah, that's great.
Is this good enough? Is the voice right?
Yeah.
The voice is right, but there's like a general air of like, you want to be cute, but you're cursed with being hot.
Alright.
Ah.
Yes, that's it.
Yeah.
And you, you're colder, so the way I've written it, you have kind of like an on again, off again thing with Princess Shiverblight.
Alright, yeah. Okay, so I...
am like sleeping with this dragon?
It's complicated because you've like pledged yourself to her,
but now like personal and the professional are getting muddy.
It's hot and cold.
We can't ever be together even though we want to be so bad.
Yeah, yeah.
I understand.
Yeah, you see this tall, Aladdin man in like a bad theater troupe beard nods and takes
the note.
And you see, uh, Saira visits you backstage.
You see, uh, she kind of crosses her arms and looks around and goes, it's a bit pedestrian,
but you know, it's good for what it is.
You're going broad.
I like that.
I like that
You know I'm just trying to appeal to as many people as possible the way we think of it is like a fun service Yeah, broad. You do politics. I do entertainment
Both are not that different. I know my limitations and I belong on the stage not the political stage
Anyways, this is what your 17th time seeing it, so.
Yeah, and I'm still waiting for myself to pop up.
Where's Maeve Heypenny's sister?
Maeve Heypenny was an only child,
and that was part of her tragedy.
Okay, yeah.
She's really beautiful, but also really hot,
and no one notices the former, and she's an only child.
She's really beautiful, but also really hot? Yeah. Despite being beautiful and she's an only child. She's really beautiful but also really hot.
Yeah.
Despite being beautiful she is also hot.
Yeah, exactly.
All right, so you hear the piano starts on the opening song and you hear, there once
was a beautiful Aladdin but she was cursed with being hot.
Rock, I've written two characters that I kiss with being hot.
Well, no, I'm cute but hot.
You want to be cute but you're hot.
I want to be cute but I'm hot, right.
You rush out on the stage, you do the show.
I don't play myself.
You don't play yourself, you're just the director.
No, another Eladrin named Summer the Autumn Eladrin plays,
maybe.
There she is.
Cool. Is that you? I don't know. You don Aladdin plays, maybe. There she is. Cool.
Is that you?
I don't know.
You don't know, okay.
So Callie disappears for an unknown amount of time,
goes and plays Maeve Hay painting, maybe,
or maybe it's some of the autumn Aladdin, we don't know.
Saul, Calder, and Kenna appear, and you watch this show.
Oh my God, there's an imperfect soul clone.
What a skit for mothership.
Stand back everyone.
What's going on between that guy and the dragon?
There's a, there's such a lot,
like most of the show is the relationship
between Princess Shiverblight and Calder Hildeg.
This is libelous.
What if Triss saw this?
She might not even care.
If she, Calder, yeah, turns away from this kind of poorly made costume dragon and goes,
I can't sleep with you, even though I want to so badly.
And I think about it literally all of the time.
Is this a first draft?
Mouthing along with every word. Eventually, the show ends with, of course, Princess Shiverblight and Calder getting together.
They share a passionate kiss on stage.
Overmay Mayfanny's dead body.
As the fake Saul cries hotly, not cutely.
Yeah, you see the crowd gives it a standing ovation.
As they always do.
And Cyrus stands up and cheers along with you.
And Callie, as you come out to do your bows,
you see Calder and Saul and Kenna in the crowd.
And I'm mouthing, what was that?
Callie, is that dream?
I mouth back aught.
Cold or not.
I gesture backstage.
Yeah.
You guys all go backstage.
I come backstage and I have so many flowers,
so many armfuls of flowers.
But it's clear that I just made them.
I wanted you guys to think I'm killing it.
I'm wearing a Maeve Hey Penny t-shirt.
I bought this out front.
Is that really what you think of us?
It says Maeverick, like Maverick, but spelled like Maeve.
Insane.
Yeah, you see,
Kenna goes up and goes,
What are you all doing here?
Did you just come to see the show?
Sorry, if only it were that simple.
Oh, okay.
It's really hard to get tickets actually.
Also, Kenna, I'm sorry you're not on the show,
but you just weren't of an age
that I could give you a sex scene.
That makes a lot of sense.
And everyone in the show needed to have like,
some kind of agency.
Sure, yeah, there was a lot of that.
Yeah, so I just kind of wrote you out
to not have to deal with that.
Right, of course, that makes a lot of sense.
That was really erotic.
I just want you to know
that I do have a girlfriend though.
So just so everyone knows.
Do you?
Yeah, just so everyone knows.
Anyway, I'm putting a team together.
You're putting a team together?
Yeah.
That sounds pretty official.
Yeah, you might say, I'm on nightly business.
I bend the knee.
Shit, was I supposed to do that?
How can I help you?
Well, General Bronzebeard's dispatched me
to put together a team of knights,
AKA my peers, to travel to Asmodea
and find out about cultists
that are trying to bring in rogue gods.
Hmm, I don't hate the idea of adding a scene in Asmodea
to my play.
How's your understudy these days?
Honestly, everyone's really good.
Oh, that's great.
The play wild is just lousy with good performers.
That's how you felt about the Calder.
You see, there's an Eladrin nearby that is watching Calliope
and overhearing that you might leave and look so excited.
I give her a thumbs up
Oh my god. I'm gonna miss you so much. Yes. I'm gonna miss you so much
Don't rush back
She hates me and I love it. It's all giggles hotly
And you guys see Foster was in the show playing himself bottles out
The foster was in the show playing himself, waddles out and... Foster, what do you think about just taking on another job?
Waaah!
A little adventure just to fill the creative cup.
Waaah!
Hops up onto your shoulder.
Alright, Kenna.
Looks like we're in.
Let's go.
You guys ready for... what, more adventure?
You see she takes all your hands, makes a little circle, and pulls out her last teleport scroll.
I lean over to Calder and I say,
by the way, Princess Shiverblight has come and seen the play,
and she loves it.
Oh my god, am I in the love triangle?
Dukketeam disappears into the wind,
off on their next adventure and that's where
we'll end our campaign.
Oh my gosh.
What a nice ending for all of our old friends. Down the giantess, beaming with tale to tale
Pacing as she weaves her web of a lover that did excel
Small though he was, the way that he loved was enormous
Stature be damned, he was two times the man that a giant was.
Man him down in iron deep, a sailor of scion sheet.
Navigated expertly, her every last giant lead.
Never before had a lover performed like this Tordeth horse
Titans and ogres rendered mediocre by this tall dwarf
Small folk, big fun, sure a Floyd hard-won
Giant lover like no other.
Think of quad colossal heart.
His size belies a huge surprise.
So she waits by window side, dreaming of his return.
Never to be satisfied, inside her his memory burns.
Small folk take heed, this tall dwarf has pleased with enormity.
A small folk she met, but a Titan she wept for when hard won left.
It's the end of our show, and the end of our campaign, which means it's time to give an
extremely special shout out to all of our elders.
Thank you so much, this would not be possible without you.
Brad D.
Jeffrey S.
Lord of the Fjord.
Lader McSkater.
Matt M.
Cutter W.
Jeff C.
Daniel G.
Danielle the dastardly dame.
Carpe Liam.
Bryant the DM consort.
Victor T. AKA Balnor's boy.
Hoyt's friend, Justin I.
Danny Danster.
TJM. Trelai the Cray, Christopher B, Damiel
R, Jordan L, Cyborg Version of Josh the Cobalt, Targot, Stevie Wags, Hellish Rebuke-er, PhD,
Princess Yar, Jory S, Rachel from Anims. Ah, watch out! Jack L.
Nicholas C. star of every film ever made in Bohemia.
Mike H.
Alka Smeltzer Plus.
Great Value Gimma.
Tyler F.
Heradrian.
Carrboro Chapel Hill FPV.
Rex Daniel.
The White.
Cici Lulu.
Old Cobb's Dunkle, Older Burn. Rex Daniel, the white. Cici Lulu, old cobs dunkel older burn.
Hercule Poirot, ze labet folk detective.
Timmy R, Rico.
Calder comes cold, shout out to the cold com companions.
Frosty facial.
Taylor B, maybe the real treasure was the friends we made along the way.
Maybe, Taylor B.
Cass Strong Grinch.
Steven Jack Tyker Amork Ol C.
Mike K. Nick W. William W. Big Bad Butteau the Mad.
Eric McD.
Ananarama.
Percival Fredrickstein von Musel Klasowski de Rolo III
J. Dragonborn, Guardian of the Vibe, Honoring the Cock
Ambrosia Honeysuckle, Bin A, Dave H, Dustin S, Danny F, Hawkeye Pierce
Bookfars Assistant, Izzy F, Big Bad John, DPC is Awesome!
Hashtag honor the cock.
Shone, the shade tree mechanic of Zelbeldar.
Summer Rose, AKA Grandtear.
Cat C, Mesa of House Enzunza.
Ariel, the occasional mermaid.
Selena N, AKA Felaceiraptor.
Be Perky, always.
Pat L, Maxwell J, Lauren H, Serv 16, Annie, the Feywild
Therapist, Connor S, Zaleel, Bioquart 7, Amber Dextrous, Bean Rat was innocent, Drub
Hopdropper, Jack Hubert, King of the Mall People under Iron Deep, dressed in blue and
fighting his way through a bracket style tournament.
Valen, Paj, the bitch and bunny bard.
Carlin C, Noah, the Bullywog boy,
hashtag honor the cock.
James G, Everything Bagel, the Aladdin
who just wants to hang out with his pet badger Stripey.
Daddy Master Dandy, Reverend Chatterbones, Han, Eric B., Marcos, learns the balance druid,
Frida M., Pagos, self-proclaimed Faye King, now with real musical improv action, hi-yah,
Maggie, Holly the Green, laughing hyena, finally caught up to Duck Team. Akash T, Cal, just Cal.
Aaron B, Russell H, a monk named Dilgo.
Yes, the whole thing.
Yes, every time.
Cody C, Lorelai the succubi and Kira the succulent snack.
Makenna S, your friendly neighborhood
yawn and yunkle Andrew and Sid.
John Adams didn't win the vote but won your heart
Meg, the male carrier of Bohemia
James F, Austin S
Wayfair now has to do something with the trolls
To get rid of them, turn to page 42
To keep them, turn to page 69
Shane C, Barpo Goodbarrel
Barbarian!
Welshlander!
Garrett G. aka One Big Curd!
Renee the Monster Captain!
Box Clifton!
Olivia the Enchanting Bard and Jared
the Soap Opera Cleric
who are playing Sticker to the Man
down with the Monarchy!
Winterslade Fico
Gertrude the Artificer Damon J
Anthony the Raddest of Dudes J
The fairies have amended all their ways and are volunteering at their local petting zoo.
Wow, you love to see it.
Cantrip Dumbledore the bear onesie wearing barbarian.
Lexi H Roger L
Nodrog the pacif wearing barbarian. Lexi H, Roger L, Nod Rock, the pacifist barbarian.
Gino T, Gianluca, Tristan the talentless hunk,
shenanigans O'Connor, Mios the Great,
Joshua S, Alexander, Linz W, Johnny Dude K,
Pavu Eskinoor, the Goliath paladin
providing service with a smile.
Tim M, a cat napping in a sunbeam listening to a podcast.
MLG Cheeto.
Shell B, Kenna's first favorite sprite girl. Thanks to the two crew for a gorgeous campaign three.
Now Kenna, go get your girl. Amen.
Jackson R, Snailus who's infecting Worcester, for within.
Captain Morgan, pirate wizard.
Papa Skadez.
Mima Skadez.
Megan N.
Anthony B.
Savannah H.
Balnor's best friend, Steve.
Stephanie, of House Inzunsa.
Benjamin A.
Gimli the Corgi, Papa and Foster's canine
friend, Mikel A, Josh Hole, pilot of the Nightmare Verse flight, Froakie, the two crew, Blue
Through, Jennery, Ethan the Mailman, Maple the Shy Bookworm, As Ashesaurus. Seth E. Billy Batson.
Tory, the tungsten dragoose.
Michael L.S. the second.
Jacob, the purveyor of shenanigans.
Carl B. Plumber of the realm.
Dex Riddlewell.
Hannah A. Ra.
AceDregs, High Lord of Critsburg.
Darius Davis, the Guy from That One Thing
Troy's Mom, Vin Diagram GKC Teehee Teehee
Cadmilius The Consumed Bard of Holding
Clinton P Grinchful Cam, The Grinch Frogman
Dean J.W. Hi Mom
Tuesday Cross, The Choose Your Own Adventure Writer, not the Porn Star.
Steve L. Alex G. Zimmy DeBakery!
Nicole!
Katerina C. and Lady Jacqueline P. of Castle Whitestone!
Thank you all so so much elders!
It's been a wonderful campaign and you have made it so!
Thanks so so much!
We'll see you here again real soon. It's been a wonderful campaign and you have made it so. Thanks so, so much. We'll see you here again real soon.
It's been a pleasure. Goodbye.