Not Another D&D Podcast - Eldermourne - Ep. 36: The Great Fairy Secret
Episode Date: October 8, 2021The two parties converge at the vault and find out what lies beyond its doors! Hank rocks a dimensional fanny pack, Fia steals a spell book, and Zirk attempts to level with a fellow wiener. S...upport us at Patreon.com/Naddpod to get access to the after-show and a bunch of other Naddpod content! Music / Sound Effects Include: "A Wizard's Tournament" by Emily Axford. "Bonkginya, Fia Bonkginya" by Emily Axford. "Spooky Shafts" by Emily Axford. "Unknown Tome" by Emily Axford. "Winter Sprite" by Emily Axford. "Soul Coins" by Emily Axford. "A Memory" by Emily Axford. "The Ruins of Cragwater" by Emily Axford. "Haunting Visages" by Emily Axford. "Gutless" by Emily Axford. "The Scales" by Emily Axford. "Oh, Melora!" by Emily Axford. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Goodbye, Sweeties.
Welcome to the campaign after the campaign after the campaign.
This is not another D&D podcast.
Welcome back to Elder Morn, everybody.
The crew is back in studio, including first off, Jake Herwitz.
Feeling kinda needo, riding a top of beato, because that's my studio.
Oh no.
I'm doing for that
And with that entire plane ride do think we need you to find back
Watch a movie and take a nap
And then of course we've got Emily Axford iron wheel no chill in a wizard's quill Fia bulginia
And then of course called a Tanner ah the retriever of the quill who Murph can't kill
It's gonna seem like the often a zirx here as will
Well both of you are dead now
camera dead
natural causes oh
Yeah, the bido rhyme worked
It turns out that jakes in
That cloak zirke licked was just full of disease.
Oh yeah.
Not mine.
Yes, this is our first time all back in the studio,
since probably like episode 88 or eight...
Or we might have only done like three or four episodes of campaign one remote, right?
I don't recall, I don't recall.
It's so easy for someone to look at. Yeah, but it's been like a year and a half. Yeah, yeah, we did the last like 12 episodes of campaign one remote, right? I don't recall, I can't pay in. It's so easy for someone to look so. Yeah, but it's been like a year and a half.
Yeah, yeah, we did the last like 12 episodes
of Camp In One remote, I think.
Yeah, incredible.
Well, everyone's hair is so much longer than mine
and I feel very self-conscious about it.
Yeah, we'd have neat hair loser.
We'd take care of yourself.
You look the same pre-imposed COVID.
What the fuck?
I'm sorry, I hate this about myself.
Sweet guys, I cry every time I shave.
Let's go ahead and do a little recap.
So last time, Fiya, Chrissy and Johnny
snuck into the Vault Keeper Athacore's Tower
and navigated a series of puzzles.
Along the way, Fiya learned some disturbing news
that Maksora had brought Bookfar to Athachor in hopes of
extracting information only to inspire the vault keeper to create Bookfar-like creatures
in his lab.
You confronted the Necromancer who used Bookfar's magic to create his own familiar,
Tomvar, Pozer, only for Fia to counter spell him.
A crit baby.
Yeah, you did crit you did, Crip.
What number did you get?
That would be a natural critical 20.
OK, just wanted to get a quick reminder.
I want to see one live today.
I'll go back and edit it out.
I swear to God, I will.
During the ensuing fight, Chrissy bravely
went toe-to-toe with Athychor, but was knocked out
and left clinging to life.
Luckily, Johnny was able to swap places with him and give him a little time, during which
Johnny and Fiya were able to kill the Vault Keeper.
Afterwards, a dying Chrissy managed to pass his death saving throw, allowing just enough time
for Fiya and Johnny to bring him back up.
Thanks to a classic Johnny swap.
Hey, you're done.
This is all happening in tandem with Billy,
Zirk, and Hank facing Captain Donovan,
Calhoun in the Beto Cave.
Now the two parties are set to converge at the vault doors.
Sorry, can I hear Votos Abidos?
I forgot too.
Oh, it's weird alive.
Yeah.
This is like our barbershop quartet noise.
We need you to just blow a little horn that makes that noise
so that we can all get in tune.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
It's good.
It's like a quizoo that made noise instead. Oh, it should do. Check out really, really. It's really like a kuzu that made oil instead.
Oh, it's a dough.
Check out the NAD pod store, everybody.
We finally resbrized kuzu.
That's right, we have a Beto box now available.
Oh my god, we're broke.
So you guys, the two parties are now set to converge
at the vault doors below Endo Castle to enter Old Zoboldar.
Oh, but first we are still in his Wizard's Tower.
But first you are still in the Wizard's Tower.
Oh, great.
So both teams have killed their designated vault keepers.
Arena has taken out the main alarm system on the inside
and you are ready to head to Endo Castle.
On the sending stone, however, Chrissy and Billy,
you guys are the ones holding the sending stones,
Chrissy for the one team, really for the other.
You guys both get messages from Arena saying
that Moxura has entered the castle
and was probing some of the mages about the vault.
Arena has conveyed that everyone needs to get to the vault ASAP,
because she doesn't know how much longer she can keep the security system down
without anyone noticing she might be a little late to the vault herself,
but she will get there eventually.
Is there any way to authenticate that this is in fact a ring that's talking to us via the speaking stone?
Are you asking this to Fia?
A Fia Billy W whoever's at home.
I think maybe Fiya can look at it.
I am kind of like, I don't know if we've talked,
I'm kind of like a special connection.
We like hang out in each other's dreams.
It's like, you know what?
It's us.
I know, yeah, it's like when we were kids,
we would be like, let's take a nap
and maybe I'll meet you on my dreams, all right?
Let's try to meet up in our dreams.
And it never would happen, but now it has happened.
So I take the sending stone and I look at it
and can I do like some kind of insight check?
Yeah, go ahead and do an insight check.
19.
19.
You hear almost, it's not like a live phone call,
like she sent a message, Chrissy
replays it for you.
It sounds to you like it's arena, and also you don't really understand if it were Moxor
or something doing a trick, why she would be telling you to go to the vault fast when
you're going there anyway.
Okay, it makes more sense for arena reaching out being like hey this window of opportunity is
Closing let's go
Okay, so yes, so let's start with the Chrissy Fia and rundown Johnny okay, so we have a fire under our ass
But real quick I have heard about this dream about this moment happening to me and I thought I'm just a witch
Why would it ever happen to me? I want to take this fucking wizard and spell book.
Can I take this fucking spell book?
Oh, you want to take this wizard spell book?
Yeah, do you have the bag of holding?
I do, yeah.
Yeah, Tom far is deanimated and is a big ass Tom but has, that does indeed have spells
in it.
Do you want to help you cut off up this book so you can carry it for own?
No, I will take it home and I will go over it tonight after we have fucking destroyed
Maksora.
I throw it in the bag of all the...
I do quick, I actually do a quick arcana to make sure that it's not going to like,
it's not like a lich that has it in him.
Sure.
13. You don't get the feeling that there's anything cursed
about this book, just that much like you with BookFar
where BookFar is a regular spell book
who then you cast Find Familiar on,
that is what he did to his book.
Fucking poser.
I throw it in my fucking bag,
and I get his spells now, right?
You do get a bunch of his spells, certainly, out.
Oh, that's brilliant.
And that'll take his jacket.
That's, oh, hey buddy, that's my jacket.
It's perfectly.
Oh, it's very small on you.
And Fiya, this dude is a little bit of a poser,
so he mostly just has spells you've already seen before.
But he's got a couple, level one and level two spells
that you do not have,
and I'm gonna hand those to you right now.
I've got a paper.
Wow, look at that live handbook.
Oh, look at that.
Lacerate, Venom Strike.
Oh, yeah, read to us.
Unsucrate, desecrate, I've never even heard of these spells.
Oh, that's unseerious.
What are these?
Yeah, so these are, these are spells.
Do that one for me.
They love me. That love me.
That he may have created or that are just like more known amongst the endotarion wizards.
Bissol rich?
What?
Some of these seem like miris love spills.
Pocket?
Oh my goodness gracious.
I will take some time with these later when we are not pressed for time.
Oh wait. some time with these later when we are not pressed for time. Oh, hey. Okay.
And this out of character, these are some homebrew and some old spells that have been transferred
over to from a 3.5 into 5e.
And this list of homebrew spells was put together by someone named Frank Isaacs on Reddit.
I found it, I was looking for some spells that we would not have heard of before
Thank you Frank. I have to say I am so impressed that you anticipated that I printed out some spells for you
This is so insane. I really thought it I am so impressed. Okay, so Fiya Steels tome Vars tome Vars got some new spells in it
Okay, so Fiya Steels' Tom Vars, Tom Vars got some new spells in it.
Ah!
Ah!
This Tom Vars come back to life just enough
so that we can get a little bit of their voice.
Oh, I think you said,
hello, miss.
I think he was just deep book far.
Drive, drive, drive, drive.
Sweet, so is there anything else you guys would like
to do before heading to the vault?
Keep in mind, you gotta be quick.
I know, this was my only thing I'm not even going to
read these spells right now. I grabbed this book I'm out of here. Yeah and those short rests at all right. I have
nothing to gain from a short rest. I will say I will say Johnny and Chrissy you guys can do like a
moving short rest like just enough time to kind of like patch up the wounds because you guys I know
still have some hit dice left. Can I look around for like a healing thing?
Go ahead and give me a perception check.
I guess we'll say like as you walk down you can check the lab.
Oh can I help?
Yeah.
17.
17.
Yeah.
I'll say you find, go ahead and roll the D4.
Let's see.
One.
Okay. You find one potion of greater healing.
4D4 plus 4.
What?
Undereldo's hands.
May I take these?
Yeah, it's all yours.
Oh, okay.
Thank you so much.
Johnny, I just want to thank you.
How do I do what you did back there?
Oh, yeah, no, no, don't think twice, man.
I want to thank you, too, for not dying,
because that really would have ruined my weekend.
Hey. Weekend. Johnny's got a short memory. Twice, man. I want to thank you, too, for not dying, because that really would have ruined my weekend. Hey, weekend.
Hey, John, John's got a short memory.
You know we lived together, would you have like,
trade their into my room or what?
Oh, well, I would have moved into your room
and I would have tried to rent out my, that's beautiful.
That's really touching.
I extend my bony hands for a handshake.
Hey, pre-tator shaken.
Switching rooms because you love Chrissy so much
or because he has a bigger room.
Bigger room, more stuff.
You guys are ready to head to the vault.
Is there anything you guys want to do
as Billy, Hank, and Zirk?
I think Billy's in a really bad way.
Zirk too, physically in a bad way.
The alcohol bolstered me a little bit,
but I am still at one hit point.
So I would love to take a short rest,
maybe try and get some spell slots back.
Sweet, yeah, you guys can take a short rest.
Is it okay if I just encase myself and some of this goo,
maybe put myself in one of these eggs on?
You're already falling backwards into it.
A beto, trips, falls over and gives birth onto your...
Lays, eggs, and the eggs immediately hatch.
Zerk spoons one of the babies.
You thought my cloak was gross.
Okay.
Okay.
Sweet, so you guys are gonna take a short rest as you move,
but let's get all of you guys to the vault.
So here's how this is going to work.
You guys have taken out the vault keepers.
The security system is down.
All you need to do is get past kind of the guards
at like the archway of the castle
or going through like a servant's entrance or something.
And then you can access down where like the dungeons
and like the vault are.
For Billy, Hank, and Zirk, you guys can do a group stealth check
or a group persuasion check to like essentially talk your way in because you guys are dragones and
For Fia Chrissy and Johnny you guys will have to do stealth. Great. Okay. Um, I think definitely let's go stealth
Yeah, would this be a good time to maybe set off that glyph with the fireworks in it?
Uh, would it be? Yeah, if you guys set off the glyph with the fireworks in it,
you can imagine some security would be sent there.
Likely from the castle.
It's close enough to the castle.
Okay, it's on the show.
All right, babe.
Great, are you ready?
Cool, Zirk whispers into the corresponding sigil,
the password that he came up with,
which is him saying,
baby, you're a fire,
you're a fire,
oh, by a guy named Zirk. I don't think fire's ear, oh by a guy, nymphs ear.
I don't think it's working, so grab this thing and loud it.
Love you, your fire, your work, made by a guy, nymphs ear, and now it's time to distract some guards.
I, I, as you should across the sky, I, I, The beatos start screaming like humans
All at once Billy's like and they all start laying eggs
Okay, we have to get the fuck out of here and it smells terrible. I don't want to die like this
I mean I guess I'll grab some more eggs
So Zirk you set off the fireworks.
You guys can go ahead and do stealth checks
with advantage.
All right.
Group stealth check.
Two of you guys have to pass a DC-15 passive perception
for the guards.
Do we still have pass without trace?
That's probably expired.
It has expired, but you can cast it again if you want.
Okay, yeah, I can cast it again.
Henry bangs the guy's arm twice on the floor,
and it bursts into smoke again.
And we have to pass without trace.
That's okay, so that's a 38 for bit.
Yeah, no, that'll do it.
Oh my God, I crit.
Whoa.
Oh.
That's gonna be a 21 for Zirk.
Only a 21 for Zirk.
All right, you know what?
The advantage in plus 10.
Yeah.
No.
You have a screaming beater on your back, that's why.
I put everything into the song, okay?
This is the only time you've ever seen them act aggressively.
Sweet, so you guys successfully sneak off.
The castle is not far from where you guys are.
You guys go through the castle district,
like this area beyond the castle wall,
without being spotted, no one has been tipped off
to the captain's death yet.
This is all within like minutes.
Oh, before we go, let's like kind of like cover,
let's fucking bury the body.
Oh, right.
It's already covered in eggs.
Can you, yeah.
We can, we can, I can't find the body.
There's so much going on.
Billy, our friend is very good at this.
I think we have learned enough from her to do it ourselves.
We dig a trench.
Wow.
You guys start digging and you guys realize
that the ground is in fact mostly bead-o-shit.
Like it's just as soon as you press into it,
there's like a crust on top and then you crack it open
and it gets warm and wet.
Billy, take a, take a, take a wiff of this.
Take a wiff of this. Of the B.O.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S.S. that. Absolutely. We try to make dynamite from fucking beost. Isaac, I'm
begging you. I'm running. Isaac runs out of the room. It just seems really flammable
as all. I'm not in on fire. Zirk, go ahead and give me a tinkering check with disadvantage.
I can take it too. I will say at 10th level, which I think we're leveling up soon,
Zirk gets the ability to craft items for a quarter of the time
and a half the amount of gold.
OK, I don't know if that would affect shit dynamite.
So I'm going to say you're just going to collect the shit
right now.
Billy is like really rich.
OK, so I've so much golf.
Oh, he's talking about it. You guys got really good stealth checks. He is like really rich. Okay, so I've so much golf.
Oh, he's talking about it.
You guys got really good stealth checks.
So I'm going to honor that even though I want to kill you.
You guys, go through the castle district
and you guys make it to the castle.
You guys slip in to like this entrance
that like servants and stuff with you.
Oh, gold in my pocket, this giant.
Yeah, no, you're gonna be able to buy a bunch of awesome equipment after this.
In fact, maybe you should just give it all the Fia and she can use it.
That would be classic Billy Bayer.
Very hard with her goals.
I always want to demand her, young girl.
Okay.
And then we are going to cut over to Fia, Chrissy and Johnny.
So you guys are going to need to make a stealth check.
Hey, you guys also get advantage.
You guys don't know why though, but there's just fireworks going off in the middle of the
can't create.
I think Fia knows why.
You know why?
I think Fia recognizes Mr. Zürerks.
You don't see it yet though.
You're in a tower.
Although I guess you're up in the tower, the top of the tower has dispelled.
Yeah, you look out and you see fucking fireworks going everywhere. I say baby you're a fire
What was that?
Nothing
If only we had our friend Billy's riches then we could just pay the guards
I have a baby book for our shatters the glass and latches on to feed us neck and rip sir throat out.
I got a 16.
16.
Passes the passive.
17.
17.
Passes the passive perception.
21.
21.
Passes.
Sweet.
So, you guys sneak out of this tower and you do see that
Nearby a bunch of drag goons are congregating around this firework show
Trying trying to stop it because fun is just absolutely clear
I'm gonna do an inside to see if anyone's into it sure they might be on our side. Oh, I will I will give you the help action on these
Sweet, this is really important because I also care to know that Mr. Zerk puts on a good show.
That's a 19.
19, you see that there are a couple Stoic dragoons
that are looking at it and aren't jumping to stop it.
Wow, this is what change looks like.
Look at that one, he's melting the words.
Wow.
So both teams sneak over to the castle crossing Look at that one, he's mouthing the words. Wow.
So both teams sneak over to the castle,
crossing the moat of Blue Lava
before entering this keep of black stone.
Can I ask, you both have lived in this area
with all this Blue Lava.
Hey.
Do you swim in it?
Do you drink it that it pour out of your taps?
Blue? I feel like Murf, can you touch?
I see Murf shaking his head, but yeah, check this out.
Johnny scooped some up with both hands and runs it back through his hair.
I don't think I'm making a mistake.
Johnny doesn't do that. He would die. He knows he would die, because he lives here.
Yeah, Chrissy puts in arm on feances.
I lost a lot of good friends to that lava.
It's so tempting to want to do a big cannonball into it.
But you're simply cannot.
Yeah, you've pretty much said exactly what I'm feeling right now.
And fear does a sitting cannonball.
So you call crumbles into a little cannonball.
That's a dirt cannonball.
And then Sam's back up. OK, be strong fearbook in you. OK, I cannonball. That's a dirt cannonball. And then stands back up.
Okay, be strong, fear boogini.
Okay, I'm ready. Let's go.
Sweet, okay.
So the teams both know the layout of the castle
because you guys got it from Eiser,
who's sort of like one of the people
that was like the brains of the operation.
What a lot was able to get the schematics.
You guys are able to use a variety of passageways
to get yourselves to the catacombs below the castle.
So you guys travel through these dank caverns.
There's a cold chill in the air
and the echoes of far off dripping.
Both teams converge from separate tunnels
into a large cavern that houses
these giant fault doors. There are several passages that spit out here. Some go to the
castle dungeons, others go to secret passageways in the castle district. You guys see the
vault doors are these enormous iron doors that reach the top of the cavern. There is a message written in an ancient language.
You would assume deep folk.
There are mounted torches on either side of it
and in the glow of the torch light,
you see two dragons here standing guard.
You have passed these dudes passive perceptions.
What would you guys like to do?
Billy would like to put the sending stone on vibrate.
Okay.
And that's it.
Fucking shoot one.
Great.
Go ahead and make an attack with advantage.
Shot shooter.
24 to hit.
24 hits?
Yes, baby.
Nice.
29 damage.
29 damage, Jesus. On my first attack. Yeah, dude is not dead yet
But as you guys are sneaking up you see Billy from the other tunnel pulls out a crossbow
Shoots this dude in the neck. He's like a zombie. You see a bunch of like coagulated blood comes out of his neck
That's not a Billy already. Damn, you shot that guy in the neck.
Don't, I haven't seen you in ages.
It's good to see you.
Oh, look at you.
Look at your ingot.
Oh, like a ingot.
Engot, go say hi.
I still have almost half of it.
You look richer and richer everything.
Engot runs off.
These two dragon go to draw their blades,
but go ahead and take a second attack.
I agree, baby. I agree with my god. Oh, oh, do you know what you're Goons go to draw their blades, but go ahead and take a second attack
Oh My sneak attack but a five
Billy finish this dude I'm going to so of like be like
Chrisie, Johnny let's do this And then I just wanna like use my bow
to like sort of ricochet him off the wall
and then plop him into their laps.
She's a Christ.
Yeah, you shoot him at a direct angle
that he flops over in the direction of the other tunnel.
Full on, almost take, zerk out.
Like this is a big, bulky dude.
I'll say anyone who wants to act next
can take their surprise round.
Who do you guys think can do the most damage?
Probably the rogues. Yeah, yeah, it's
gotta be. It's gotta be.
I have one last show. Chrissy, go for it.
Oh no, Johnny, you go for it. I could take same time.
It's same time. Three, two, one.
Johnny and Chrissy run in. That's an 18 for Johnny.
Hits. That's going to be a 29 for Chrissy. Good.
Good. God, do your damage. Yeah, you guys both surround this one dude
One of you guys goes for the chest one of you guys goes for the neck. It's fucking brutal
That's gonna be a 26 damage for Chris. Jesus 31 for Johnny guys finish this dude
Okay, I need Johnny why don't you give this fellow a haircut? I was just thinking he needed a haircut
Johnny gives him a really amazing haircut
And he needs a picture too
Yeah, then I slid it I slid his throat
Very nice. I'd also like to run up to and get pet pet him like a dog
And get jumps up yeah, you guys are reunited.
So the rogues have kind of all jumped into action.
They're these like assassins.
So they're the ones who take out the guards here.
Fia, you come out of the tunnel,
and you see Zirkenhank for the first time,
it's forever.
Fia.
Fia.
Miss Audrey.
Miss the resort.
Please come here.
Give me hugs.
Give me hugs.
Yeah, we have such a sweet little nerdy.
You know, crying hugging. I saw your fireworks. Give me hugs, give me hugs! Yeah, we have such a sweet little nerdy, you know.
Cry hugging.
I saw your fireworks, everyone was loving them.
It was like, beautiful.
Yeah, you should've heard the song.
I'll sing it for you later in the trench.
Okay, wonderful.
Trench?
Yeah, when we finally get a moment to take a trench and maybe you're gonna take a break.
Yeah, okay, great.
It's so good to see you.
I'm so happy you're okay.
Do we have time for a quick ritual?
I think so.
Zerk brings it in and kisses them all on the cheeks.
As all six of you arrive here outside of the vault,
actually, seven of you, Isaac is here too.
Isaac, really?
I'm gonna see you guys.
Who's this?
We met during the worm fight.
What?
We were rolling around, I did super cool blood magic.
Oh, I feel like I have a headache from you talking.
I said, I said, I said,
How's it going?
It's time for me to wet my blade.
I like it a lot.
I'm gonna say, who put those buttons on?
You building was that your work?
It was bad. Sweet, everybody go your word? It was, babe.
Sweet, everybody go ahead and give me a perception check. You guys can just pick whichever character
has higher perception. It's definitely Johnny.
Oh, yeah, that's a 26. Oh shit. Oh, it was a two, then it went to 12, that's going to
be an 18. Right. Oh, 21. Actually, oh, Mr. Reserve, Mr.. Henry I came of age I was gonna say you look more broad shoulder
Yes, I'm really starting to fill out my armor. Yes, do I write you a check? How does this work?
So nominations of 18 you guys
I actually got a 25. Oh shit. I got a four on my little plus four Wow, okay
Yes, so with with your guys perception checks you guys hear So I actually got a 25. Oh shit. I got a four on my little plus four. Wow, okay, yes.
So with with your guys perception checks,
you guys hear screaming echoing through the tunnels.
Uh oh.
As if it's someone being tortured.
Okay.
And do I recognize this voice?
Is it really nice?
Yeah, you don't recognize it.
But Chrissy and Johnny do.
Johnny, you got really good perception.
You recognize it as the voice of your friend, Iser,
your ally who was supposed to get you
the merchant credentials, and over the years,
it's like contributed a lot to your cause.
The voice is far off, but you can hear that he is being
questioned by, you recognize the Lord side's voice the Lord side himself you hear
All right, let's fucking co-okay, let's go introduce ourselves up
Fia is it alright to believe you?
Absolutely, yes, of course do whatever you need to do. That's all right. We've got to go rescue Azer
His name's actually Isaac as well, but he's smarter than the other Isaacs.
We call him Isaac the Wiser.
Isar, it's a long story.
I didn't know that.
I thought he just preferred to be called that.
So we bring Isaac with us.
This is devastating.
Who?
Yes.
I was okay.
Isaac, I've been there the whole time.
My God.
You see, he turns away from his own friend.
I'm sorry, like Chrissy, Johnny, I have to tell you,
he's been like just hanging around.
Yeah, he's just like creeping at the edge of every single
thing.
Well, it's crazy to be too much and not a lot
at the same time.
I know, it's like crazy.
It's like, he's too good at stealth, but then a bad way.
Isaac is just pretending he can't hear anything,
but very obviously Ken, because everyone's in a while while you see him just twitch. Okay okay you know I
bit of Benny feels a little bit bad so she gives him like a little kiss on the
cheek. Oh thanks. You see he turns to Fia Zirk and Hank and he goes this is a
great opportunity for our cause. If we could potentially save some of the people
that have been kidnapped down here,
but we do need something in that vault.
We don't need to go in ourselves
if you can get it for us.
Anything you need, just tell us and we'll get it.
You see he pulls out this magically-enchanted bag,
like a satchel.
It kind of looks like the bag of holding,
but it's a little bit smaller.
And you see he pulls out a matching one from inside, and he passes it to you guys.
And he goes, this is called a paired dimensional bag.
Whatever you place in one will pop out into the other.
Oh, that's awesome.
So we don't need to go into the vault ourselves.
We just need documents, books, whatever.
Some kind of proof that the Reaper isn't actually behind the Empire,
that all of this divine punishment stuff is made up.
We need to free the people, have them not be living in fear.
Can we set up some sorts of things so that if you're in trouble,
you can put something through the dimensional bag and we will know to come get you?
I'll send you a button. A button.
Yeah, they put buttons on my armor because they forgot to do anything for me.
No, that's not why.
That is not why.
That is no way.
Which started looked good on you.
Okay, cool.
Can I have the shield then?
No, because it won't fit in the bag.
The button's better.
Okay, yeah, I'll send you a button if something goes wrong
Okay, the stress button. Yes, and we will send you something as well if we are in trouble because I don't know what is behind the vault
I have a patch on my denim jacket that I can send through
It says help for some reason. I think it's a Beatles or a Beatles reference
terrible for some reason. I think it's a Beatles or a Beatles reference. It's terrible.
The counterpoint.
I agree.
It's evil.
It's evil.
Henry, do you want to wear this?
It looks about Fanny Pack size.
That seems like it would really work for you.
Yeah, yeah, I do.
Sweet, you take the paired dimensional bag.
It's a Fanny Pack.
It's a Fanny Pack. It's a fanny bag.
And you see Billy, Chrissy, Johnny, and Isaac
begin sneaking through the tunnels,
hopefully to find aizer and perhaps some
of their other old allies that maybe haven't been killed yet.
Chalfa, no.
And also, they might be able to get the Lord's side
in a rare moment where he's not around a ton of people
We are gonna break the scales. It's time sweet. I'll give them both like a smack on the ass as we go
Back I've been on the cover and I'm like so horny
There is a forge blazing
There is a forge blazing on my two two if you have been living with Chrissy same as we're walking away
Chrissy looks to Billy and Johnny's like should we after this you know just
All three of us just you know
I'll put into anything
Yeah, all four of us. Why not? Oh, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, joking around it, everything, but you guys were generally pretty quiet when you were talking.
And the Lord sighed, this literally screaming, and you're barely hearing it.
But you guys have this very narrow window of time when you can enter this vault.
Because I'll say arena has conveyed that she's going to need to put the security system
back up and effectively like meet you guys later.
Okay.
Where either of you left with instructions of how to open this door.
Um.
Um.
Uh, okay.
We've known three to four things ever.
Okay.
I know.
We knew really good how to get here and where it was.
Uh.
And I run my hands along the door looking for some kind of like knob handle.
Fiya, you rub your hands...
Soft wood.
Along the door.
You develop...
You don't feel any soft wood.
I could punch it through.
You do see that there are words in the deep folk language that light up as you hold your hand.
There's no... I can't see through this door.
There's not even like a little hole in there.
No, not even like a little hole. I'll say if you guys want to give insight checks or
Archana checks or whatever
That's a three okay
Henry investigates his fanny pack
It's pretty cool
26 for fear holy shit. Oh wow, okay better than Zirk. Yeah
You can't read the message, but you recognize that it is the same phrase that
was on Zellboldar 7 outpost.
Blood from Stone.
Okay, so I say blood from stone, glory to Zellboldar, and I minor illusion a stone to look like it's bleeding.
Oh, nice trick. You can't tell if it was the words or if it was the bloody stone.
Let me just put a little bandaid on that, but as you speak the words, you hear a click and
the doors open inward
Surprisingly quiet does not open like fully opens a few feet and you see
Just dark abyss beyond it
Okay, I see that we are all wearing magical clocks and clocks
Crocs, hmm Do we stealthy and I think I could also send
Crocs, hmm, do we stealthy? I think I could also send shankin up to a thousand feet and see through his eyes Sweet, okay, that seems good. Okay. Can we also say that while we were taking a short rest?
I minted Spritell so that the armor is back up to full yeah Spritell Spritell is back. I did not
Reanimate Philips so this is life you smell that shank. Yeah, yeah
Oh, this fully loaded potato skins in that hallway
I know it's thing. Yeah go me it just kind of smells like take a look. I just like a cold
Wind I work
You see
Darkness through shank's eyes. He crosses beyond the vault doors
Should I forgot to tell you guys not to let anything fly into my mouth while I was warghing?
And...
Shank is gone.
You don't know where he is.
Your eyes come back to...
You?
What?
It must be some sort of like teleportation or something.
Shank has always been here.
I tried to conjure him again.
You cannot conjure him right now.
This has never happened to me.
Okay.
You know what?
I actually just came from somewhere really tricky like this.
I take out one of my zombies and I cock it in.
You hook a zombie hand through and you don't hear it hit the ground.
Huh? Huck is on the hand through. And you don't hear it hit the ground. Huh. What?
There are usually land with such a loud wet thud.
Oh, that's okay.
Well, I mean, should we go retrieve that hand and my shadow?
Yes, I think that we should tie ropes around our waist.
I know we do this a lot, but you've been mass, I think.
All right, you can't underestimate the power of a good rope.
Yeah, like a climbing kid.
Let's tie it up and maybe make little ropes with our hands
that are holding each other.
That's great.
So you guys hold hands and tie ropes around your waist
and pull points of contact.
And would you guys like to enter?
Before we enter, can I take a look at this darkness?
Does it look similar to the darkness we passed through to get down into Indotera,
the one that FIA fell through?
Yeah.
Okay.
Can I put a mage hand in there and see what it feels like, maybe?
You put a mage hand in there and it doesn't get cut off or anything.
You just cease to be able to feel it as it
goes in it just like disappears. So it's some kind of portal let's just hope it's you know transmitting
all of us to the same place. Yeah I'm gonna prepare a reaction to cast Long Strider on Fia, okay, in case things go bad. Thank you. Doesn't she already have that?
This will turn her into a grasshopper, it's gonna look weird.
Okay, yeah, I think I'm like, I'm actually, we had a really difficult fight, but I forgot
to tell you, I did a little of these counter spells, they tried to make a mean book for,
and I said no, and then I counter spelled it
Mean book, why that's not Philip
You're so lucky. He's not animated right now. The only reason I said it
Finally someone talks up to that guy
Okay, I yeah, so if I think I'm not going to do anything to like prepare
Okay, I'm just going to go anything to like prepare. I think I'm just going to go in.
You know what, we've come this far?
If what we need, what we desire, what we've searched for is beyond there.
I think I'm ready to risk it.
It's time for a leap of faith.
I also didn't tell you.
I saw Arena in my dream.
I know we have to go in here, but I'm really scared we're going to get separated.
So I want to make sure you know I saw her
She's well, I didn't see her. She was at my back. We're kind of like connected and
She's I think a little bit scared of her own power
but
I've thought about it and I think that she doesn't need to be. So I just want to let you know that that's happening.
Okay, nothing changes for me.
We're still blades, we're charged with protecting her.
That's right.
Good, okay, great.
Okay, then I think maybe we go in.
Sweet?
I saw a giant bug give birth just as long as we're sharing
everything.
Really, did the bug give birth to like a baby or an egg?
It was, it was a lot of, mostly after birth and eggs.
Mostly after birth. I don't know how both happened.
Zirk, did you get some after birth?
Oh, oh plenty.
Oh good, good, good.
He also has a vial of shit.
Yeah, Zirk smells awful.
This place is a gold mine.
So you guys step in and enter the darkness behind you.
The vault doors disappear.
It's just shadow.
But as you walk into the abyss,
the city center of old Zalbaldar comes into focus.
It's built on an escalating series of rock plates, these like rings. Along where the cave wall would be,
you see that it is cloaked in shadow with some type of strange spirits moving through it. You see like warped faces of ghosts and specters.
Kind of reminds you of some of the stuff you saw in the mist.
Yeah.
Can I look for my father?
I saw him in the mist.
You did see him in the mist.
Go ahead and give me a perception check with disadvantage,
just because you look at me.
Well, I already rolled the one.
I see if I rolled the one twice.
Well, actually, I rolled it three times because I rolled the one. I see why I roll the one twice. No, well I actually I rolled it three times because I rolled
a one and eleven. You do not see your father there. But you guys do see the bottom ring of the city
that you are about to enter is strangely covered in snow despite the fact that you are inside a cave.
I love that. There is a cold winter wind,
and as you look around,
you realize that these are not ruins at all,
but a perfectly preserved city center.
There's no moon,
but the snow here is bright as if reflecting moonlight.
You see all of these frost covered buildings,
twinkling with powder, but they don't look damaged at all. You see taverns, libraries, places of worship. You also see people
in the streets. What's frozen? Oh, not unlike Batilda when you found her in the blades temple.
Tonight, I was gonna say, can we inspect one of these frozen people to see if this is magic frost? on her in the blades temple. But that is the work of all win the soul in.
I was gonna say, can we inspect
one of these frozen people to see if this is magic frost?
I also want to make sure the frost isn't ash.
Ah yeah, go ahead and give me an investigate
or a perception check.
It's a 19 for Henry, 21.
So you guys go around and you start looking at these people.
You see that the majority of the deep
folk here look like the same kind of build of the people that you saw in the Zubaldar outposts,
short but burly with tusks and these eyes that clearly have dark vision, like the kind of reflective cat eyes.
But you also see the occasional humanoid of like goblin lineage or one that more closely
resembles of like what you would think of as like a dwarf, these kind of like
deep folk that don't have tusks. And as you examine them, it does look remarkably
similar to what happened to Batilda.
But that I thought was the work of Olvyn Solen.
Was he here?
Can I send him if it is similar, if it is like fairy magic?
It is very magic.
I guess.
I don't.
May I take my green flame blade on my sword and see if it like thaws at all. You go to cast green flame blade and via you feel a cold hand on your wrist stopping you
and you see Owen the Sullen, this greater winter fairy, all blue with like the swooping blue hair over one eye and he goes,
Oh, fear, don't thaw them.
I thought we killed you.
No, you destroyed a projection of me.
Remember you said you weren't going to hold it against me?
And is this you or another projection?
No, this is the real me unless you want to kill me then it's just a projection don't be
mad at me we're friends I was trying to help you.
What happened here?
Why did you do what you did?
You were trying to save them?
I presume?
I can't tell you about what I can't tell you about but I can tell you that I can't tell
you about what I can't tell you about. I can tell you that I can't tell you about what I can't tell you
So you have a very promise a very promise
Come tell you
So you are dying so much
He's just like dancing in place just like this is not the time for dancing
Because Siri is always I can dance with you
You said you said to the one he goes I just can't tell you what I can't tell you
But I can't tell us but can you can you do it with interpretive dance? I can you dance it out?
No, you see he stopped dancing
Can you tell us who I can't but you're here
Listen first off. I just want to say I'm sorry about that misunderstanding
The temple it wasn't misunderstanding. I was trying to protect you just like I'm sorry about that misunderstanding. But I get the tempo. It wasn't misunderstanding.
I was trying to protect you.
Just like I can't tell you, I can't tell you what I'm trying to.
I can't tell you what I'm not telling.
I'm not telling you people she can run with.
Well, he's be the one.
I can just see you're all in skittering.
Why are they getting that?
The little eggs, no.
Is there anyone else here that we could talk to?
There are other people.
One of the greater fairies from each of the seasons
on each of the rings.
And you see he gestures up.
And you see in the deep, deep distance,
you can almost like you're looking up at the night sky,
you can see a little bit of like a green ring.
So this is about the footer stuff for rings.
Yeah, that's right.
And I just like, is that a way that you could just
like right now and be able to answer?
Listen, I'm the one who, this is the true
Zobaldar city center. I'm the one who's responsible for the people here. That's I can tell you that
I can tell you that much but there's other things you can learn here
Is there like a docent we could talk to with the city's and talk to anyone here because they're frozen
You are frozen by your hands now that they are safe because we are here
They're not safe. You're not safe. No one safe here. Why do you only think I can't because I'm trying to keep you in the
Knees oh
You don't understand I'm very powerful a more powerful than I was when I did the projection
I can't, I can't. I can't. I'm trying to be honest with you. I can't with this guy.
I can't, I can't.
All right, yeah.
Mr. Hanks, Mr. Zerk, can you?
Because I can.
All right, I'll do my best.
OK.
I don't do good around crying.
Hello, I think he's crying.
It is.
I don't know if he's crying or calming.
I think it's all.
Hello.
Let me talk to him, weiner to weiner, OK?
OK, level with me here.
OK, all right.
There's just a lot going on,
and there's just so no one's really happy
that he's going on.
It's just like, I'm very confused
because I was really hoping to like find all of the answers
to all of my problems in here.
No, exactly.
Listen, sir.
Fias spots the skin of Bito wine on Henry,
and she's like, can I have a fucking seat
to get through this?
Yeah, give me a guzzle after.
Save a little bit for me.
So you guys drink, oh, oh, oh,
when in Zurich have a Weiner conversation.
Oh, when goes, I'm really sorry about the misunderstanding.
No, I'm really sorry.
It's fine, it's okay.
Look, I just wanted to preserve you and make sure
that you're okay, because I think that a majority
of humanoids are evil, and they want to hurt all all my friends and I don't want that to happen.
But now apparently you're all very powerful and apparently maybe you're going to help bring the chosen one and help us fix problems.
The chosen one?
I can't say anymore. It's like an elevator to the next level somewhere. There is, but there are so many things
that you could learn, but I can't tell you them,
and I can't point to where they are,
because that's cheating.
Yes.
Is there like a map I could do
so that you don't have to interact with you?
There's so many things.
I think I got it.
All right, so could we maybe rig up
some sort of system where like,
we give you a speaking stone
Scorps and I can't
Or against the I can't can't tell you the promise to can you tell what?
Okay, okay, can I get the wrap the wine?
Can you yes? Okay?
Okay, can I get the right to wine? Can you yes? Okay
I don't I that that it wasn't affirmative, but it didn't happen. Oh, yeah, you said yes in a very way
You guys do see you guys are in fucking Zelba dark They're like library I am trying to celebrate it, but these fucking so fucking
I just you you tried to okay for someone. I was gonna leave you alone
Okay, yeah, Lynn can I'm gonna ask a question. You're going to be quiet boy
I'll skip just give us a tiny break
And also just try not to breathe so loudly because it's a mighty breath. I can't with this guy
So cold we can see your breath. It's just a whole thing. It's gone. breath. I can't with this guy. I can't with this guy. It's so cold, we can see your breath.
It's just a whole thing.
It's gone.
I'll be quiet.
OK.
What is dangerous here?
In your opinion, what do you think you're saving everyone's
now?
He holds his hand up and gestures to the spirits along the wall Who are they?
Spirits, I can't tell you listen
How many fucking fairy promises do you have you have?
I can't not tell you that I can't tell you that I've made promises
How many promises are you on my man?
I can't tell you guys anything
It's like the combination of have frustrating in these to talk to someone so
whiny and also someone so cryptic.
Yeah.
All combined in one.
I don't want to be cryptic.
Can I just drain this beetle skin and try to kick in the door of a library?
Yeah totally nice.
Thank you Mr. Henry.
Cooler heads prevail.
Cooler's prevail.
I think the skin and I'm like you really did come of age because you down this thing.
Oh hey, come on.
Oh yeah, sorry.
Can I make an investigation check for old liquor?
Yeah, certainly.
So do we see does old wind follow us while we move around?
Yeah, old winds around.
He could also leave.
I'll go if you want.
You don't want me around.
No, stay here.
You're being careful when you're not being.
Just Owen will never tell.
This is behind.
I'll just stand in the pants of the corner.
Sprydled, do you think you could just provide
like a power cord for him to sing along to or something?
I got a 19 to try to find Old Licker in this old.
Yeah, you find you there is a tavern and there is like ancient wine in here
Yeah, I think this is the first thing I've had to drink that isn't directly from a bug
I'm forever in your dad. Do I know if it's actually made from a bug?
It is not made from a bug. You don't think you are correct. Cheers
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Okay, that's it for me, go team pants, and enjoy the show.
Yeah, you guys find a cask of this.
It seemed like it was even magical at the time that it was made.
It's like aged to perfection and then maintained there.
It doesn't like, because old Zelbaldar is like 10,000 years old.
If there's any Somalia's, you know better.
I don't think wine would keep for 10,000 years, but this wine is magic in does.
So don't add me.
I don't think anyone will.
Don't worry.
Somalia's don't add.
They just chime their glasses.
Right.
So yeah, you guys find this wine,
but you do see, you guys wanted to go to a library.
Yes, you guys go to this place that is a temple
like to the fairies.
In fact, it is called,
ooh, you guys don't read deep folk,
I don't think. Actually here, let me say this, Owen waves his hand and casts a spell on you
and is going to cast the comprehend plan, which is spell. Oh, cool. See, this is the gesture
of good faith you could have made like 10 minutes ago. I didn't know. I'm sorry. Now Henry dances. Have we had dances?
You guys see that?
You guys see that?
There is a place called the Temple of Saint Serenesis.
And you see this enormous building covered in frost,
big stone pillars, and a top of the roof
is a statue of a faye woman that fia you recognize
as being Serenesis, the form is a statue of a faye woman that Fiya you recognize as being Sarenesus.
The form that-
The form that Arena took.
Oh, that's sort of like Elvenlo.
Yes, exactly.
Okay, this is Arena, this is what she turns into
and she does really powerful magic
that she can't totally control.
Yes, she's worth protecting.
Are we into this?
What do you mean?
Just like out of this form, this is good?
Well, I think the way I see it is like, we talked and she showed me a vision of a moment that she wasn't proud of.
And it startled me to be sure.
But the way I think of it is like, magic to her is like paint, right?
And to me it's like numbers. And so she's painting
and I'm doing math, right? So like all I can do is kind of understand how the world already works
and try to use that. And what she does is like make new worlds. And it's just messier. So I think
it's not bad, but it is messier. Does that make sense? Fully, yeah, I've been known to make a mess.
I understand what you're talking about.
You're ricocheted.
This is my hope for why I think it's maybe not bad
and maybe really good, but maybe my emotions
are clouding my judgment.
I think as long as you're being true to yourself,
your methodology doesn't matter. Yes, but I'm saying like as you're being true to yourself, your methodology doesn't matter.
Yes, but I'm saying like, you know, like maybe her magic is more unstable because what
it is doing is just inherently messier.
It feels like you're the one that can bring stability to that though.
I think I am.
I think this is, I wonder why this bit betilled task me to guard arena. She's so powerful. She does not need to be
guarded and it's like maybe I have to guard her from
herself because I can bring rather than strength stability.
So that's my answer to do you like this? I don't know, but here's my thoughts.
All right. You can learn to like it. Yeah. So you guys see, um, the archway here is open.
There aren't even doors. And as you guys walk in, you see this massive library with many
different levels, rows and rows of Books all marked off in different sections.
There is a layer of powder over the entire library, but nothing seems to have been damaged
by it. And you see sitting at Rose of Desks are these deep folk, like monks, that are
frozen in place, and they are copying books and that should
between like them like copying all these books and also like the open archway
that should give you kind of an idea.
What are you dissemination of information?
This idea of being like you are welcome to come in and learn about all of this stuff.
Do they look like they were copying books at leisure or there's kind of an urgency to this practice?
You see that they all look like they are working
on the same book.
The ones in this section.
What's the book?
The book you go over and you look at it
and you see there is a book called The Fairy Promise,
a secret shame.
A secret shame?
Shame. I need to read that. called the Fairy Promise, a secret shame. A secret shame?
Shame.
I need to read that.
Sweet.
Yeah, I peek over Henry's shoulder.
It's a distinct idol.
You guys, we'll look, begin flipping through the pages
of this book.
And you see, as you do, all when, you know, not being as wine,
you're anything, just kind of like walks out,
like looks like visibly kind of ashamed of the situation.
You guys begin flipping through the pages
and it becomes clear to you that this book was written
after Zell Bulldar was transported away from the mortal realm.
So they didn't all just get like frozen and pulled here.
They like lived here for a bit
like this book looks like it was written here in like the endotera plane and
It's very strange because unlike the religious books that you would read in the material plane
These are also history books. They have sources and they're talking about fairies and the gods and something called the plague war
Understanding the plague war seems central to knowing what the book is talking about as you guys are going through this
It feels like you're reading like the 10th part of a history thing that you don't know what the fuck they're talking about.
This is what we came here to get though, right? We came here to because the libraries have
knowledge. The information that the Billy needs. I'll say I'm going to go ahead and get it.
Sianna's name and this. Yeah guys, go ahead and give me uh investigate checks. Great.
Can I can I see if there's one on Lyonora? Nat one.
Yeah, you know what?
You say, is there one on Lyonora?
As you go to wander over to a section that talks about the fairies and stuff, you see
Owen appears and goes, oh, you're looking for information on the spring fairy Leonore.
Yes, yes I am. When are you the one that can help me?
Can I help you? No, but she can. She's on the next ring.
Spring.
How do we, how do we get up there?
Well, after you find out what I can't, can't tell you that I can't tell you,
then I can make some little frosty little steps
and you can put a pattern up there.
Okay.
All right.
Okay.
Can I go around for a lather?
Yeah, I'll say, I'll say,
I'll say, Fiya, go ahead and make investigation,
perception or religion with advantage.
Well, cool.
I just create our religion.
Create on your homework, my friends.
Yeah. You are looking around for some books, advantage. Well, cool. I just create our religion. Create on your homework, my friends.
Yeah, you are looking around for some books, trying to find some context for what this book
is talking about. And you round a corner that's in like this section of these like history books that are specifically like the history of the Reaper religion. And you see
a little bit of black smoke in the bottom section of one of the bookcases.
I reach for a book behind this black smoke. You reach for the book behind the black smoke?
I like wind says my hand goes through it.
As you reach your hand through it, you feel it break apart and you hear a little,
it was wrong for you.
Your hand goes through and you find the spine of a book that says the last judgment.
I take it out and't have work at it.
Fia, you open it and you start going through it and you see that this is a
recounting of something called the plague war and the nature of horrors.
You were told on the material plane that the Reaper and the Trickster have a feud.
The Reaper doesn't want people to have magic, so he sends horrors to Elder Morn to punish
them.
This is only partially true.
He does not continually send them.
He sent them once, and it was supposed to end the world.
So the last judgement was not the last?
It was the last one that he was a part of. The Reaper's job is to judge souls and decide
if they're good enough to go to Revery, but his job became significantly harder once the
Trixter gave magic to the people. People had more fun, there was more chaos, less order, harder for him to judge someone's character.
Too many other influences, so the Reaper sent down a plague on the world using magic to raise
the dead during the reaping season so that humanity could reap what it sowed. But humanity prevailed.
it's soed, but humanity prevailed. This was not an apocalypse. This became known as the Plague War, and after losing the Reaper abandoned the world. And Fiya, as you read those words,
it kind of hits you all at once that the pain and shame that you suffered in his name
the pain and shame that you suffered in his name was all the result of human greed and misplaced faith.
And as you let out that little noise,
the black smoke that led you to this book
comes into your body as you breathe back in,
and you have a vision.
you breathe back in and you have a vision. You are a formless entity being pulled through a bis. You do not have complex thought but you feel strong feelings of
anticipation. There's a little glow of light in the distance, but you are surrounded by darkness.
And eventually you stop moving and you slow to a hover. Go ahead and give me a perception check.
Okay. 22. In the dim light from the far off glow, you can just barely make out a set of scales
next to you. Cast aside, dropped by a god who has given up on this world. You feel panic,
confusion as you are once again thrust forward and pulled through the abyss
until you reach the source of light.
Glowing faces, spirits, trapped, and forever unrest, your essence, shh, breaks apart, and
all of the things that make you join the wall of spirits, the only thing left of you is
a fragment. The only thing left of you is a fragment.
The only thing strong enough to remain is regret.
A sentiment so strong it outlasts your body, mind and soul.
I was wrong.
I was wrong, Fia. Fia, you exit the vision and are back in the library. So this was what my father saw
when he is like trying to go to his precious reaper. It did you didn't have like complex thought,
you didn't have his memories or anything, but you can assume that this was sort of like your father's spirit, ascending to what he thought would be meeting the Reaper
and instead becoming one of these lost souls.
Hmm, so, the strongest thing to remain was not love or fear, but regret.
Okay, if we are going to say this is a feeling we are not going to deal with it right now.
And I'm just going to focus up.
We are in this library.
Let's do this.
So I guess trying to make sense of what I've learned, like, if the Reaper is gone, why
do his horrors to linger?
So you keep reading this book. The continuation of horrors is all residual magic.
When a god casts the equivalent of what would be a concentration spell, it just stays there
forever.
The reaping season was just supposed to happen that one time, but it continues to produce
horrors to this day, albeit mostly
minor ones like skeletons and zombies. That's why when you guys were in like the Orn
Kirk cemetery, there was like that area that was like locked away. Like that's just a part
of life. It's just like skeletons pop up. It's it's it's fall. So I get the sense if we
could find the Reaper and break his concentration that this would
go away.
You don't have any idea how you would do that, but you do kind of realize in this moment
that a lot of the worst horrors like rates and ghosts and these things that are more powerful
than just like your run of the middle like skeletons and zombies are created by human
evil.
Betrayals, murders, broken promises.
This was not part of the plague.
This was the nature of elder mourn was like,
if someone dies and they've been murdered,
they might come back as a ghost and that
always a fucking person.
That always happened.
Okay, so that's always happened.
Is that as a result of the tricksters magic
or is that a result of the Reaper's curse?
That was the Reaper not even as a curse
just as a way of him punishing evil doers essentially.
But the rise of horrors unrelated to the Reaper
is that as a result of residual magic from this cycle
or is that something else?
You would think it was from the cycle.
I almost feel like it's like I'm wondering if it's like,
there is this residual Reaper magic,
and then when it mingles with the rottenness of so many humans,
it almost becomes its own kind of steam.
It's mutating.
Every time it cycles, it's getting stronger
and more distant from what it was before.
Meanwhile, who's judging the souls?
Who judges the dead?
Where do their souls go?
You hear Owen go?
Ha ha ha ha!
Is that, are those the faces we see in the mist?
Ha ha ha!
It's funny because it's true, right?
Ha ha ha ha!
Okay, well, I certainly pocket this book because this's true, right? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha one of these books through the interdimensional bag. Okay, book through the interdimensional pneumatic tube.
Yeah, put a library card in that, okay.
You send it through the bag.
I'll also take one just for us.
Great, and I'll say that you find a book right next to it called
The Betrayal of Saint Sarenesis.
Ah, that looks like a dood.
See that one looks relevant?
I think I look at these two. You take some time with this book
and you see that during this plague war one of the reasons that humanity was victorious is because
the trickster was secretly helping them. She sent her two daughters, Serenus and Herodicia, who were supposed to temporarily embody humans,
but after the war they decided to stay mortal to stay in the Elderborn. This proved to be a fatal
mistake. They grew old and their powers dwindled, and so too did the memories of the people they helped.
The Deep Folk knew about the trickster helping during the plague war,
and they knew about the Reaper abandoning this world.
I'll say even like, as you guys look through these like other books that are about like the Deep Folk history and stuff,
part of the reason they were so advanced so long ago, like this looks like an advanced city for now for the current age
And this is a long time ago
The history of the deep folk as you guys just like I'll say you peruse like a couple of these you guys are probably reading like different books
You see that the deep folk
originated from
dwarves and goblins like making a a treaty essentially and
Then there was no war in the mountains
for like thousands of years.
They like came together, and there was no war,
there was no infighting, just pulling their knowledge.
This kind of like utopian area.
Yeah.
Meanwhile, the rest of humanity, the rest of the humanoids,
you know that the empires only had been around
for like a thousand years, but before that,
outer-brown all that, they were territories. They were fucking going at each other
They were people were fighting the giants at one point
Before the territories were the territories people were fighting over those so constant war
constant loss of
Knowledge constant like changes in leadership and everything
But meanwhile the deep folk were able to like build up
the society where they're talking to like literal demigods, the fairies. But they have light switches.
Look at this. But of course the deep folk, because of the nature of a lot of the other human societies,
they weren't necessarily sharing everything with them because they kind of wanted to say
stay secrets to a certain extent because they were the other ones were all constantly kind of
invading and attacking each other. Yeah, this I mean that kind of it makes sense. Can I ask
as I'm looking through the betrayal of Saint Cironisus? Is it Heradija who betrays her? So you see
do I see the name Maxora? So you don't see the name Maxora and it does not look like Herodisia who betrays her? And do I see the name Maksora?
So you don't see the name Maksora and it does not look like Herodisia betrays her.
Let me get back to this specific book.
You see that despite the fact that the Reaper had tried to end the world,
people began basing religions around him again,
saying that the horrors were a just punishment,
and that the only reason that they won the war and defeated
the horrors was because of his fair judgment.
It was just a test.
It was us surviving a test, and now we've been judged fairly, and the wicked died, and
the good stayed, and this was like the basis for like a whole bunch of new religions.
They love a harsh God.
Yeah, humanoid will hate themselves, love to hate others. Eventually, the sister witches were killed by villagers for practicing the tricksters magic.
And because they died outside of the grove, their souls were thrown back into the cycle and
they were born anew.
Serenesis, who was known as the tricksters' daughter of the spring, was born again with none of her memories.
Just soul into a new body, none of her memories.
But Herodicia, the daughter of winter, and preservation and things like that, retained all of hers.
So she has, over the course of her many lives, attempted to conquer humanity in revenge.
Conversely, there are
records of different iterations of Sarenesis, and most of whom lived unspectacular lives,
and the ones who lived more kind of exciting lives end up being killed for being witches.
Heredicia, that's gotta be Maksora now.
That's what I'm thinking. That's why I flip so fast.
Yeah, so you think that's quite likely,
and you see that the corruption of Herodicia
has led to her being banned from the groves.
This decision broke her mother's heart
and the trickster also abandoned this world.
Fia, do you think Arena's read these books?
No, I don't think she knows any of these.
I think she only knows like a hint that she is the trickster's daughter, but I don't even think she knows she has a sister.
Okay, that's gonna be a fucking hell.
But Maksora will know because Maksora all of her memories remain.
So that's why she's been trying to find her.
We have to get to her before Maksora does. All of her memories remain. So that's why she's been trying to find her.
We have to get to her before Maksora does.
But what would if Maksora is angry at humans for destroying her?
What does she seek to gain with her sister?
Is she seeking to radicalize her and use her power against the humans?
She does not seem from what I've read that she seeks to revenge
on her sister.
She hasn't been able to do it herself, but maybe they could end humanity together.
Fear, remember what you were saying about numbers and paints?
Yes.
I worry that Maksora is some sort of dark mathematical equivalence to Sarenesis.
I thought I was her math.
Let's hope you are.
That's all.
That's why we have to get to her first.
Oh, and can you make us those goddamn stairs?
Just in a moment, oops!
You see, he knocks over the book that they're working on
the fairy promise, a secret shame.
Sorry about that. It's okay, did you just... are you trying to zip it up and it keeps on going to a specific
page?
If anyone wants to pick it up, that would be fine.
I can, yeah, let's look at it.
You guys look at it.
And this book that they were writing, you learn that the fairy's feared humanity.
The fairy are much stronger than your average human, but they are way fewer
in number. They live forever unless they're killed, but they rarely if ever reproduce.
Meanwhile humans survived the apocalypse, managed to kill two demigods, as well as thwart
heredicia's constant attempts to take over the world.
Basically, if Word got out that the trickster was gone,
the groves were in danger of being invaded.
They needed to cover their tracks.
So, like these base vermin, which just keep reproducing,
who outsmart everyone.
We are the Beatles of the humanoid world.
You guys kind of are the Beatles.
I'm going to start the beat.
Look at us as beetles.
Answer the question.
Oi, oi, yes.
That's true, I can say that.
Everything I say sounds like oi, oi.
And oi, a beetle?
You guys dribbling your wine.
You guys see what the fairy promise was
that Owen can't talk about.
There was a vote amongst the fairies. This was that O'Winn can't talk about.
There was a vote amongst the fairies, and eventually they came down with a way to protect
themselves.
Fair promise was made to never speak of heredicia, serenesis, the trickster's abandonment
of the groves, or the plague war ever again.
The only problem is that the deep folk knew all of this.
This is something I'd be done about it.
The fairies used their collective magic
to pull Zelboldar into the same dimensional space as the groves.
You know that the groves are kind of like a reflection of the material plane
but they're in like another dimensional space.
They pulled Zelboldar there. So they meant well, but this're in another dimensional space, they pulled Zelbaldar there.
So they meant well, but this ended up being a huge mistake.
When Zelbaldar came here, it combined the Reaper cursed land
of the material plane with the magic of the groves,
and the place almost immediately filled with horrors
worsened by lost souls who began to congregate here
because of what Hank said, because the Reaper was no longer there to sort them.
The Reaper used to occupy Exodus where he would either reincarnate people, send them to
Revery or cast their souls out to live in the Abyss. That plane was dispelled once the Reaper left,
and the lost souls came to Zelbaldar, like moths, to a light.
So we have like overpopulation of ghosts.
Exactly.
So Indotera is Exodus.
Essentially, yeah, by default.
That is what essentially, it was almost as if Exodus
was like a magic arcane bubble or something, and it popped.
Wow.
And then it goes here.
Sharp Spires of the city popped it, yeah.
And additionally, without a God controlling it,
the cycle of reincarnation has gotten sloppy.
So it's not just the lost souls
that were like cast off to be punished in Exodus.
It's possible that not everyone
that should be coming back is coming back.
Like it's glitched.
It's on autopilot.
With a crack?
With a crack?
Yeah.
So it's the equivalent of like let's say mechanically,
if you died and I said, roll a luck check with advantage.
And you got two ones.
Maybe you become a lost soul in Zalbaldar.
It's not, the system is not perfect anymore, right?
You solve one.
I mean, I'm looking at this thinking like, obviously this is just a bandaid, but like,
if someone like Arena can forge new things like this, it's like, we need her to make like
a passageway to...
Reverie.
So, via, as you continue reading, you see that you're right on the fucking money.
So, they effectively doomed Zoboldar by accident.
Um, and the citizens that survived the horror attacks
quarantined themselves to here to the castle district.
The fairies are not powerful enough to save them and stop them from being like overwhelmed.
And you would think that living here for a long time,
were they not like frozen if there weren't protective magic,
they might go mad,
or they might be more horror attacks here.
And the hope is that one day,
Serenesis will return and set things right,
but the fairies can't talk about her.
Well, wow.
I'm worried that
Sarenesis won't have enough power to do it on her own.
I feel like
Herodicia and Sarenesis might be two parts of the same key.
Well, you know, together they might destroy the world,
but separately, all we need Sarenesis to do is create a path.
Yeah, I, in my dream I'm telling you,
she was like so powerful like I I
think she could do it. If you think she can then I trust you. I'm telling you
she kind of just like she doesn't I work with like spells and the little
particulars for her she like thinks of what she wants and then just makes it happen
we need to tell her the truth because you know then maybe she'll she'll want to help
i know she'll want to help i guess the question is like how will she feel about finding out about
her adiija and then the other question is is her adiija going to get to her first
And then the other question is, is Herodicia gonna get to her first?
Yes Can we give a fucking ice cream?
Yes, of course, and now we can know that you guys know the secret we can talk about it because we want to talk about
Cerrani says I haven't talked a lot in forever. Oh, we don't have to talk about you generally know everything that I know
But it's just so nice to be able to talk about it
But now that you know the secret, I'm not gonna say anything else
It's like a gossip about anything I want to gossip, but I just want to say I'm really sorry about our mistake. Are there any other fairies?
You don't like you can tell the other fairies we don't like
Who do you fucking Kate?
Kool is to the crew so mean she's up on the
Summer one summer one. She's gonna shoot you guys with fire arrows fuck. I'm just see
Just just remember like as much as you don't like me, I didn't try to kill you,
I was just trying to freeze you.
I'm just trying to help you.
I know, I know you're trying.
I have two questions.
Number one, who's hooking up with who?
Who's hooking up with who?
Generally, we kind of keep doing ourselves.
Okay, great.
We're truly hooking up with anyone.
But we kind of just like, everyone gets together and hooks up like once it really like,
10 or 100,000 years.
But that's not nearly enough.
That's not nearly enough.
I say that as someone who's fully only ever kissed and
would cheat someone.
Oh, yes.
Well, and then of course, Leonora is not returning my calls.
So I have a surprise.
We could pass a message onto her.
Say to respond to my calls.
Say to tell me in order to respond to your calls.
What should we expect about Leonora?
We are going to be walking into a realm.
You say, Kalista is going to shoot us with fire arrows.
What does Leonora going to?
Leonora is pretty like, I mean, it feels weird to say nice things about her
when she's like being so mean to me.
But...
Oh my goodness.
Have you thought about like maybe what you said to her last?
Like, maybe? Yeah, you like maybe what you said to her last? Like maybe?
Yeah, you could do whatever you did around her.
That was like the end of the night.
I never come to the little wintering.
Why?
Oh yeah.
So what are you willing to travel to her?
Because maybe you are being a bit needy.
OK, so you're mad at her for not coming to your place.
But you never offered her to go to her place.
My place is chill.
Literally.
There are a lot of fun, there's a lot of taverns and libraries around his place.
So we're like living right in the city center.
Of course.
Okay.
Well, while you're building this giant ice step, the second thing I wanted to ask you about
is there a medicine section in this library perhaps?
Oh, yes.
We can certainly talk about that.
Yes, if there are any fucking healing portions. You see, um, I would love to, I'm sure that they are
frozen, but I would love to lick a healing potion. Speed, um, I'll say, um,
already pop. Uh, all win, um, makes like a little walkway of ice and slides through it and takes you guys to a wing
of the temple where clerics and alchemists are working on spells and experiments.
Zurk, go ahead and give me an investigation check with advantage.
All right.
Nice.
Nice.
That's what my friend. Crudundle homework again.
Zirk is ready.
Zirk, you look around and it looks like they were trying to work on like a catch-all
spell to like cure any malady.
This is it.
This is everything I've been looking for.
It's here.
Excuse me.
Zirk runs over. It's here. Excuse me, Azark runs over.
You run over, you look at all these notes and all these schematics and everything and
you see, oh, and appears next to you.
And he gestures.
Hey, man.
Are you cold?
I thought you did the ice.
I dig the ice when I'm cold.
I see he gestures to one of the clerics.
Um, and he goes,
This is the work of Saul the Wise.
She and her fellow priests invented many of the spells that you still use today.
Cure wounds, greater restoration, remove curse.
She did all of this in pursuit of
Creating a spell that could heal anything
Along the way
What she ended up doing was inventing all of these specialized healing spells
She never quite got to what she wanted to get to but she got close
And the pursuit is half the dream
pursuit is half the dream and
Says it right there on that archway
Zirk yeah, you see that this this person's like life's work are they are these like or
Them and the other people that they worked with like this whole kind of collection of clerics
Invented all these spells that you guys still use, and you see that the spell
components and stuff that she's trying to use to cast this spell that would kind of cure anything.
I'm going to give me like a tinkering check. Okay, would that be, I can probably add my proficiency?
Yeah, can I give him a health actually? Yes, I do have removed totally so I'm not completely cool to that
That's gonna be a 25 sweet. Um, sir. You see
That she's working on a spell that looks like it could theoretically bring someone back from the dead
Not as a zombie, but as themselves
And as you look at it, you're kind of like
but as themselves. And as you look at it, you're kind of like, okay, we might need specialized spells and potions to cure individual things, but damn if fucking bringing someone back from
the dead isn't the goddamn alkyr elixir, it's curing death. You see that soul has written this,
it should ordinarily complicated spell that looks like it could only be cast
by a powerful cleric, at least at the time.
The sort of, the history of spellcasting in elder mourn
is such that a lot of the more powerful healing spells
were created a long time ago and passed down.
But some of the quicker spells, like a healing word,
were invented in more modern times
to be used on the battlefield.
Right. So, magic hasn't really gotten more powerful over the years,
but it has gotten easier to cast.
You think this could be cast by a wide range of current spellcasters.
This is a breakthrough. This is a scientific miracle,
and you believe you could learn this spell.
Zirk looks at it and he's initially a little hesitant
because he realizes that a lot of the
automation and mechanical complexity of this spell
feels very similar to what was in the necrophone.
Hmm, yeah.
Just for this many moving pieces to work in harmony.
You do notice that an important difference between
the sort of schematics and the like raw spell stuff that was in the necrophone and this
is that this is bringing the person back as they were.
The pursuits have to dream. What's the other half? Followed through. Fucking nailing it.
Would it be disrespectful to high five in this library?
Let's do it really, really quiet.
I loudly high five of frozen butter.
Do you want a high five meafia?
I high five another frozen butter.
If you get in on this quiet five,
so high five, if you will.
Sure, I'll say you copy down the sort of schematics for this spell.
This is, this is incredible.
I've got my work cut off for me.
Is there anything else you want to do here?
I suppose I'll look for a spell book. There's no harm in that.
Yeah, go ahead and give me like an investigate or a perception check.
16.
Ha ha ha ha ha!
See ya, there are truly so many lost spells here.
This is wild.
I have just handed her a bunch of papers.
This is a second page handoff of the episode folks.
Wow.
We are an uncharted territory.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh my goodness.
Sticks to snakes.
I've been wanting to spell for so long.
Read it.
Read it immediately.
I've been lost 3.5 e spell that I've been wanting to spell for so long. Read it, read it immediately. I've been asked 3.5 e spell that I've been desperate to get.
You target a non-octopide space within range
that contains sticks or twigs.
For the duration of this spell,
these are transformed into a swarm of poisonous snakes.
It obeys any verbal commands you issue to it.
No action required by you.
If you don't issue commands to this swarm,
it defends itself or hostile creatures,
but otherwise sticks no action sticks or snakes. Do it on our way out, please. I don't have a sock that can't but I will read it one more time
We've both found equally important spells
Can I do it? Can I check on it? Spritele? How is Spritele reacting to being in this like fairy metropolis?
Spritele's fucking pumped. Spritele is buzzing and just zipping around. I slide five, Sprite. Yeah, I'll say Sprite even was like helping you kind of find some of the stuff
zipping around as you guys were in this area with all the clerics. And how's Spoonie? Spoonie?
Spoonie is an inanimate spoon in your pocket right now. So doing good. I passed. I'll see you see
um, Shank pops out from behind you goes like, Hey, thanks for checking up on me after you threw me in the fucking abit.
Right, um, is there a is there?
I'm not dead.
Yeah, by the way, I'm so glad to see you, but yeah, no, no, no.
I just had to look around and see who was making the most noise and you guys were the ones being loud at the library.
Shake is definitely the Isaac of our crew.
Yeah, maybe maybe earned a potato skin break before you're sinned.
You see, Owen goes, well, once you get to spring, you shall be born anew.
Let's take our clothes off of that.
We don't have to take your clothes off.
If you can, if you like, they're very freewheeling up there.
Interesting.
But it's more like the long rest, you get a rest.
Oh, nice.
Oh, that's great.
Yes, well, we can have like a sleep over.
And we can see.
Yeah.
I feel like I'm on sleep.
Oh no, I have to be honest.
It's working on Jake, but not on it. I have to be honest, it's and then time. Oh no, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh And also they have different opinions about music than you do.
What?
Impossible.
Let me go to them.
Let me go to them.
And tell them why they're wrong.
It was all stop.
No, it wasn't.
The bassist.
He wrote all the cool poems.
OK.
Would you like me to make you a nice little eye bridge?
So you can tip it up up to spring.
Can someone else handle this?
Because I really can't see this guy?
Oh, God. He's here with you on me. He's been making eye contact with me like this. Hello. No, I'll take this one.
I'll take a look at it. I take a look at it. Alright, let's walk.
Okay, can you just make it? It's like a really cool little eye bridge full of little eye skiers and cogs and mechanisms. Um, no, that's just going to be ice.
I didn't see it.
How are they both whining?
Usually one person winds the other one consoles.
All right.
You see, I feel like I need to leave a present for this sad, sad man.
I am going to look into my equipment to see what the fuck I could leave him.
OK, I leave him a fucking cold
piece. Oh, cold. Thank you for the tip. I don't have anything written down.
You want me to carry your bag. No, don't touch my bag. Okay, fine. Alright, let's go.
You see, since we're going to get a long rest you have any any
spell you want cast on you. Just something fun. I can do fireworks again. Then I'm
going to I'm going to cast Tiny Servant at a fourth level to make just two
little books be his friends. Oh my god. You see two books pop up and go, I love my chemical romance.
Oh, yes you do.
All right.
I'm going to be scared of living shit out of it.
I'm going to have a great time here now.
Thank you so much.
OK.
Yeah, you don't have another one of those spells, do you?
Actually, I do.
Because I saved all my high-level spells,
thinking we are going to have, I'm going to now animate Spoony and since it's a
Since it's a fourth level I can actually do two additional objects
So is there any cut lyrics down here?
Yeah, there's like forks and spoons
Okay, I take a fork and a knife and then I animate your spoon
We're going to take a long rest and they're going to immediately go away. It's fine
But for now you have a little family of cutlery. I've been missing family
You're really sad
Oh coming from him. Oh, no, yeah, this is definitely more than I bargained for
You know what let's go join the black parade and by that I mean sleep
You see all one begins walking upward and there is an icy step
With each footprint that he makes but you see after he does like three or four
You see that the stairs begin going up on their own. You see this icy staircase leading up this is a long fucking walk
Thousands of feet to the next rail. Oh, I fucking clutch the rail so I don't fall
Yeah, oh, we're ice climbing. Do you need a do you need a rail?
Yes, I do need a okay, I thought it was kind of cool because there was like a bus on both sides of you
And you feel like the spirits flying
But I can't fly in the really got. Really goth. Okay, fine.
I'll put up railings.
Oh, it's freezing.
Yeah, you see, but some of these ice railings that are fucking frigid.
Yeah, this is a slippery ice staircase.
Oh, I put some fucking gloves, I guess.
I know not to lick this.
And you guys begin climbing the steps, heading towards the domain of spring and to Leonora the greater ferry who cursed Hank.
Meanwhile Billy, Chrissy, and rundown Johnny sneak through the tunnels beneath endocassal and prepare to face the Lord's
side. And that's where we're going to fucking do that. Come on, let us fight! Let us fight!
We're all in person, we're gonna fight right now, but no one gets to hear it for a week. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, ohOD don't sing. Yeah. Let's do this into our app.
That's very chill.
I really cannot wait for the first and first and second.
Yeah.
Oh my gosh.
Does anybody have anything to play?
Should we plug Callum's whiskey?
I'm sorry.
Yeah.
I was so excited.
Yeah.
It is not available.
I think they're all sold out.
But we'll plug it anyway.
Get it yourself on a waiting list.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Callum who's done like the Thorne Kirk design for us.
And the Bahumia map. Yep. And the Bahumia map. Yep.
And the Bahumia map. Check out I love Rese Wiski. I love Rese R-A-S-A-Y.
When you say it like that, it sounds like I love Rese.
And I do love Rese.
Say it proudly.
Sweet guys, we'll go ahead and wrap this one up.
You can follow us all on social media that we may or may not use.
At CHMRIFUSME, at Aactor or Dezamele, at Call D, is called well and at Checker which is Jake and you can follow us all on social media that we may or may not use at CHMRIFUS ME, at Actored Assembly, at Call D, is called well, and at CheckerWords is Jake, and you
can tweet about the show using hashtag and ad pod that's any DDPOD.
We are, we are, youth of the nation, we are, youth of the nation, you are.
It's the end of the show everyone and you know what that means.
It's time to shout out our benevolent council of elders, y'all are so good to us starting
with Brad D. Jeffery S.
Hall door frostbuck, steel breaker and mat M.
The wise sages who wrote the spells and Fia's newly acquired tomes.
The tomes also include a lot of pretty
embarrassing poetry that the sages really hope fia doesn't read. She probably won't,
but Philip definitely will. Jordan DJ, Cutter W, Jive G, and Dylan B,
Dragoons who were about to ambush the crew but were stopped by Billy who paid them off with a few gold pieces from her massive wallet.
Danielle the Dasterdly Dane, Andrew M, Beardman Dan, Scott D, and Danny P, Master Rogues who
taught Isaac how to conceal his presence.
Halfway through teaching him this skill, they forgot he was there and started loudly making
fun of him. Mixologist Michael McD, Vincent W,
Victor T. Boundor's boy, and Andrew B.
Scientists who theorize that be-do-shit
could be used to create dynamite.
They never tested this theory, though,
because unlike Zirk, they are normal.
Just an eye, Ragnar Ferd Wind, T.J.M. the Noenbar Barian,
Elena M. and Traylay the Grey Thay.
Fares who never make promises, only soft commitments.
The term, to flake, actually comes from these fairies agreeing to hang out with someone,
but then changing their mind at the last minute and disappearing into a literal pile of snowflakes.
Oh, when does this constantly? Jared E. Austin Bonesaw MR.
Damn Yel R.
Cyborg version of Josh the Cobalt and Gage M.
Deep folk authors who penned the self-help
Tom from Weiner to Winner, ten steps on becoming a better fairy.
Owen read the first chapter of this book
and opted to freeze the entire library instead of continuing.
Phil Burt the Fabulous Richard X Machina Michael L. Trast the traveler and Sir Carl the
tricksters other children.
None of them retained their power upon reincarnation and as such are never mentioned in history
books.
Despite the fact that they're all pretty cool.
In fact, Daniel R just opened endotarious first
subway restaurant. Yum!
Joris, Dana G, Calum L, and Jack L. Deep folk teens hanging out in the manga section
of the Zelbaldar Library. They were unfortunately frozen before getting to finish the final
chapter of Full Metal Alchemist. Truly, a fate worse than death. Flulless Whale, Sam L, Nicholas C, and Samuel B.
Billy's financial advisors who unanimously agree that the best thing to do with all her
very real, very vast wealth is to give it to Zirk, Henry, and Fia to spend on sick weapons
and dynamite.
Mike H. Udishmurliak, the baby bronze dragon, Matthew E.
Kulten B and Adam G.
Makers of the Bag Portal that the third mates in the Endo Terran crew are using to pass books
back and forth. Turns out, they just made it because they were sick of losing chapstick
and kind bars at the bottom of their bag all the time.
Megan S.
No Badger, Panama James, and Cumm all the time. Megan S. Nobajar Panama James and Cummins the Bard
Blue lava river riders
A crew of endotarians that wakeboard in the blue lava and are willing to sustain second
degree burns for the street cred that they get.
Captain sigil
Grace G. Drew Nasty
C.C. Lulu and Barnesinator
A group of horrors unleashed by the Reaper in his initial attack on humanity
who grew to love humans and human culture. Specifically, comic books, that's what turned
them, they can't get enough of comic books.
Michelle O. Timmy R. Jonathan W. The Crock-Waring Warrior. Lucas B. and Aaron S.
Pito Grimmers and breeders who compete in the Westminster
Kennel Club Bito Show.
Timmy R.s Bito One Smoothest Exascelitan, Jonathan W.
One Best in Show, and Michelle O.
Netted the highly coveted most melodic O.
It's Kevin.
Rundown Johnny's pub is mound.
New York, Steven C. and KJ.
All Wins' record producers who are sick of hearing Owens' excuses about not being able
to finish a sophomore album because he can't say anything because he made a fairy promise.
Michael M. Mike K.
Joy T. Nick W. and Taylor A. A group of elected officials trying to ban the sale of fire zirks to children
under the age of 18.
Unfortunately, it's really hard to ID people in a world with a low level disguise self-spell.
As Mi-M, Kelsi-C, Kazumeth, y'all knowing Big Bird of the Mad and Eric McD, the makers
of Stixthus Nakes, the spell that will undoubtedly be the key
to undoing Muxora's reign and bringing peace to Elder Morn.
Stix-Dus-Nakes!
Giant monsters on the horizon, Thraft, Burley T, J Dragonborn, Jorrow the Innopropro, and
Cody B.
The Major Domo's at Billy's estate, each of them major domos
for a different wing of Billy's mansion except Joro the Ana Pro Pro who made your domos
for the pool house which is a three bedroom two bathroom of the working fireplace, she's
just that rich.
Liam D, the San Dryan, Ben A, Feldonis and Dave H. Isaac's real friends.
Once the mission to overthrow the Empire is complete, Isaac is excited to kick back
with his buds and talk shit about all those awful co-workers.
Koala Bear
Catherine S. David K.
Christian S. and Dustin S. Fairy translators, these magical beings are so good at charades
that they can convey the secret of a fairy promise without breaking it.
Connor F. Kyle H. The Time Walker.
Two left eyes.
And DPC is awesome.
Billy's super rich friends.
For some reason, they all feel compelled to buy incredibly expensive spell books and give
them to Fiya.
Weird. books and give them to Fia. Weird! Aston S. Blair the bug, Blair Barbarian.
Pork Chop.
Chanel M.
And...
Valacy Raptor.
X members of Allwinds band.
They pretended to break up only to reform the next day without Allwind so they wouldn't
have to hear his whining.
Minette F.
Pat L.
Achoo the A.
Lauren H. Minette F. Pat L. Achuvae. Lauren H.
And David M.
Safety inspectors of the great fairies.
Old one is about to get a dozen citations for creating a thousand foot high icy staircase
without railings.
Joshua D. Elias Hawthorn.
Alex H.
The eldest Barry.
Evan V. Ryan S, and the Bone Duster.
Andotaren Simeleyes, these whine elitists can tell if a whine has been properly aged or
aged with magic.
They can also tell if it was made with bug guts instead of the proper cave grapes. Rubik Krasp, Adressel, Brintly Sea, Micah Bee, Ploups, and Carly Ann, Dragoons who enjoyed
Cirque's fireworks so much that they decided to incorporate sparklers into their grim military
demonstrations. Change comes in baby steps. Laurie P. Seth AJ.
Spam gaming the not-so-skilled gamer.
Connor Savage.
And Christopher J. Peppleputt.
A secret squad of elite dragoons
who surely would have killed the third maids
as soon as they entered the endog castle
had they not been paid off by the extremely rich.
Brimstone Billy.
Hoo. Leviathan. Bioquart 7, Remington CD, Amber Dexterous, and Thrill of the Fright.
The unfortunate lost souls were forced to listen to old-wing cover follow-up voice songs
on a frost-covered karaoke machine for 12 hours a day. Sullivan H. Trabhap Drapper.
Sydney T.
Alex C.
Jesse D. L. R.
The Element God.
And Lindsay W.
Owners of a new singles bar and endotera which Billy will actually be living in once
her mission is complete.
Go get it girl!
Champ Wild.
Vailin.
Sprite Pepsi. Carlin C, Anthony S, and Jake.
A family of undead who enjoy Zerks pop up fireworks show so much that they're still sitting
in an open field marvelling at the smoke left over after it ended.
Don't worry though, there WILL be an encore. Sessie A. Matthew J. TRAP.
Michael S. the Bone Duster and NOAA.
Isaac's core friend group.
They have 100% not noticed he hasn't been around for a few weeks now.
Estelle.
Baron S. S. SOSTION's romance partner from the Baronies.
Conflicted DM.
Justin L. B, and Dandy.
Endo-Taren scientists who have exhaustively studied
the benefits of BitoShit and can say with full confidence
that it doesn't actually have any.
Jennifer R. Clifton A. Richard G. M. Barber and Marcus P.
An email band that allowed Allwyn to open for them with his spoken word lyrics
and unfortunately, he worked that room. Never again.
Pup Kalish. Gabrielle M. learns the balanced druid. Dakota JP. And Pagos. Self-proclaimed
Faye. Prince. Wizards who cracked the code on the original Rebivify spell that Zerk found.
They're already turning in their grave knowing it will be licked repeatedly before Zerk reads it.
Tracy P. The Crick-Elf Librarian, NDE, Scrumpebog, Pipe, Holley, and Anthony A.
Librarians who wrote the rules for the ancient Zelbaldard library, and wouldn't you know it?
There actually aren't any. People then just knew how to be chill.
Abigail. Egg in finitum. Sloth King 777. Jungle down cowl and Commodore Galaxy. Billy's
bankers. They love when she visits because she has a lot of money obviously, but she also
flirts with everyone and it's just charming us hell.
Edison N, Russell H, NEOs, Laura R, Kyra and Logan H. We've all heard about rundown
Johnny's leather armor jacket, but these fine tailors made Johnny's fitted jeans, which offer absolutely no protection,
but they do look fly.
And that's it.
That's repping up the council of all this with a nice little bow.
Thank you.
We love you.
Goodbye, Sweeties.
That was a hit gun podcast.
guest.