Not Another D&D Podcast - Ep. 95: Divine Heart (The Chosen Saga)

Episode Date: March 27, 2020

The Band of Boobs encounter an old friend who knows the location of a powerful boon, shrouded in mystery! Hardwon tests his sailing skills, Beverly becomes a flight attendant, and Moonshine is tossed into another world. Support us at Patreon.com/Naddpod to get access to the after-show and a bunch of other Naddpod content! Get tickets to our upcoming live shows at naddpod.com/live.Music/Sound Effects Include:"Forsaken" by Emily Axford."The Multiverse" by Emily Axford."Alone" by Emily Axford."Pure Gold" by Emily Axford."Hole in the Sky" by Emily Axford."The Titan of Air" by Emily Axford."Conspiracy in the Clouds" by Emily Axford.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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This is not another D&D podcast. ["Murphy's World of the World"] Welcome back to Bahumia, everyone. Bahumia. Bahumia. Bahumia. I'mia. Bahumia. I'm your Dungeon Master Brian Murphy joined by Jake Herwitz. Hard one, short foot.

Emily Axford. Moon Shines Abbin, Fungal Fan, Heard or Mind Everyone to thoroughly wash your hands. Ha, very good. Good, good. Message on message. And speaking of good people who definitely watch their hands a lot, we also have Caldol Tanner. Oh, Beverly Togold, the fifth X-Dvot to the Lord of Light, and New Wilder of a Sword, that's

tight. Nice. Very tight. Found a sword inside of a cave I've never been, did not wash my hands after touching the sword though, but I'm immune to two disease So it's probably fine. That's right as we know nothing bad has ever happened with Bev and swords Perfect flawless record or anyone and diseases. We should do good. Yeah. Yeah, we by the way We're recording this on January 30th everything seems fine and under control We're just hoping for the best. No, we're recording this on January 30th. Everything seems fine and under control.

We're just hoping for the best. No, we are recording amongst this crazy pandemic. I hope everybody's staying safe and staying indoors and keeping social contact to an absolute minimum. We ourselves are recording remotely. Yeah. I'm looking at all your beautiful faces in my computer screen. I think we got to use them. I want to you rip them.

Most beautiful to these beautiful. Cool. I'm going to say Emily number one. I'm going to say, cold wall number two. Okay. Okay. Number three. And I regret.

Yeah, I shouldn't have actually don't like myself. I don't like the way that I look. And I'm going to say Jake coming in. Number four So close. I know. I know where I was. This fully backfired. Let's do the episode. Okay, right. Let's do it. You know what, guys? It has been a minute. So let's go ahead and do a little recap. So last time, you guys snuck up to the cave of the astral worm only to find it full of gith-yonky pirates. After a harrowing battle that saw a hard one scuttle into the protective embrace of people who...

My people now. After that you guys defeated them, then took their ship and their bounty. After investigating, you scried on the astral worm, finding it in the midst of destroying a gith settlement and swallowing meteors' hole. You confronted it, each of you eventually being swallowed and teleported to its dimmy planar belly. There, you encountered the rath on the black horse, the embodiment of famine, fueling the beast's hunger.

After defeating the rath, the astral worm seemed to come down and you were able to plane shift to its throat cavity. There, you found the teleportation circle used to create the monster's demi planar belly and the ability to digest magic items. Tanahthan was able to study the runes and believed that he could transfer the spell to a scroll in a day or two and teach it to moonsine, and that is where we are now. So you guys are inside the astral worm, this long dark cave that descends into darkness.

The monster has its mouth closed. It seems to have calmed down since getting rid of famine. Beverly, you have your new sword, the Holy Avenger, or bird killer, as you call it, I believe, indeed, Bird Slayer. Bird Slayer. Much to Peepah Luke's confusion. You'll get it. Bird Slayer is giving the cave a white light as Tonathon finishes up recording the runes with his third eye. And as he's finishing up, you guys feel a quick rush of air and hear the sound of feet hitting the floor as someone- The worm's tongue?

Yeah, the worm doesn't have a tongue because it's a contrast. So there is a floor. There is like a ground, yeah. A ground inside the worm's mouth? I mean, it's all kind of the same. You're just in a big tube, essentially. You're in like a big tunnel, like a noodle. Yes.

Anyone else just kind of curious what the ground feels like inside a worm's mouth? I already know it feels like rigatoni. So I'm here. Okay, cool. Thank you so much. You just wanted to clear it by. I just wanted to know the literal mouth feel.

People look, people look dips, hard one down so that his feet can touch the bottom of the worms throat. It's just as I suspected. As you guys are distracted by hard one being dipped beautifully by Lucanus. God that was graceful. You guys see that somebody has appeared next to you, Somebody has teleported in here. And you recognize Salis. The Gizzerai monk who you rescued from the husk, not too long ago. Our husk buddy.

Ah, yes, my husk buds. She stands before you guys. Husk club. Like you wouldn't know it. Whatever happens in the husk stays in the husk. Y'all wouldn't know unless you your Bev Salis and moonshine So I heard one why why do you need why do you need to exclude us good-looking me feel like an idiot. I'm being held in dipped Touching the al dente floor she stands before you. She's got light green skin. This bald alien head and a silver robe

and you see she acknowledges all you guys and she goes greetings. I was alerted by my shared knowledge network of your location I've been thinking about you all a lot since you've left Even me You see she narrows her eyes and looks at hard one and goes, I suspect you haven't been reading much or anything. You do know that I am a sapiosexual.

People all look, spin me around. I'd like to face the other way. Luke got his turd's hard one around. I let my eyes linger for a long time before I spin. Come on. Just to be absolutely certain, can I do an insight check to make sure that this isn't a horseman in disguise

or something? Yeah, and I'll do a sniff check. Sweet, oh, absolutely, get that sniff going. Salas smells like sulfur. My insight was a filthy 20. Ooh. A better than my sniff. It's better than the sniff.

Moonshan, you do smell some sulfur and Salis goes, I had eggs for breakfast. Do I? Oh, roachy dang girl. That's what, I'm. What up? How many eggs? You really have to, you got a pile of mon for

the greatest smell like sulfur now. What, did you have? Did you ever put them? Did you ever put them? You have an omelette. It's, and you call it a egg white, but also egg yellow omelette, where you take like 30 to 40 eggs. That's so man.

You take all the yolks out, and then you add more yolk to those yolks, and you put them in the egg white omelette, and it's like a 60 egg omelette. Do you not do this on the material plane? I'm gonna throw up a zero. I'm gonna throw up yesterday's hero's face to be stuck. A lot of surprise she doesn't smell more like sulfur. Yeah, and then she's less yoked.

I have some of the yokes. You see that she does smell like just the normal amount of sulfur that you would smell like after eating 60 eggs for breakfast. Okay, it's sour, it's a real deal. that you would smell like after eating 60 eggs for breakfast. Okay. It's sour, it's a real deal. And Beverly, you acknowledge that this is not any kind of, you use like your sense evil and you don't sense anything off.

What about my since egg? My since egg must be going off the charts. They're going not search, she's got a belly full of eggs. I had some for lunch too, I'm not going to lie. She's not lying, it's opa Gaston style over there. Just eggs all over. Yes, for lunch I had some for lunch too. I'm not going to lie. She's not lying. It's opa Gaston style over there. Just eggs all over. Yes. For lunch, I had a yellow omelet with egg whites in the middle. So just kind of switch it up there. It just says like you're making a harder omelet than it needs to be. You know, you can mix them all up together, right?

You see, she thinks for a long time. So much knowledge and so little wisdom. Perhaps there are still things for me to learn. For sure, definitely. Truly. CC, she looks at all you guys and she goes, I have been tracking you all more closely since we met. And I was thinking about thea and the divine hearts and everything

we talked about when we met last, and things have only gotten worse. The allas got the combined power of two divine hearts now, and I don't think you have hope of defeating her without some divine power of your own. And then it hit me like a fragment of a memory long forgotten. It's like it's something that I've always known but I forgot. There is another divine heart that is unclaimed on the material plane. Another divine heart? Where is it?

You see she pulls out a map that she has crawled together. It looks like a map of the main continent of Bohemia and then the frigid north above it with markings of all the different cities and everything. It looks like maybe it was at one time a Githyonky pirate map or something. You see that it's been heavily noted, but she has put in X. She gestures to an X that marks the spot a couple hundred miles south of Osmodia towards the southern edge of the planet. There are coordinates scrolled out here, that hard one. You think you would be able to follow. Ah, thank god, maps. The one thing I do know how to read. You guys see Salis looks up from the map and she goes, my memory of this divine heart is hazy, which is strange because my memory isn't hazy about anything. I suspect someone

has tampered with the Gith's collective consciousness, but then why would I be able to remember it now? Do you think there's something innate to this object in itself that it cannot be remembered, that it evades detection? You see she thinks about it for a second and then she nods and she goes certainly if there was a Divine heart, someone on the material plane that was unclaimed or if someone was Sealed away who had one people would want to keep it a secret. It is entirely possible that they would have the power to hide themselves You think we got some kind of rogue God that got sealed away?

Hey, there's nothing crazy about protecting your heart, sealing it away, hiding feelings. It sounds all above board to me. You're right, we should just leave the walls high, leave it alone, huh? Hey, but ain't broke. Hard one, you're clenching luchonis is very hard. Yes, it seems like you are you are broken No, no fine. So let's forgive me for not fully trusting the the power of the

Gith network, but I Personally have been tricked a lot lately and this seems too good to be true The power of a divine heart in and of itself seems too good to be true. To use that power as our own, I would have to speak with my friends, but I don't know if that's the way we want to go about doing this. I mean, I would agree with your apprehension, and I would think we can fight the all-ed philosophically and then adopt her methods. You see, Salis nods.

I understand your apprehension, Beverly, but a divine heart is not a corrupting force in and of itself. Remember, we're all made of the same stuff. A divine heart is just a greater collection of magic. And you guys remember the first time you talked to Salis, she explained that the universe was created after a concentrated mass of magic exploded and broke off into chunks.

These were the divine hearts that created the gods who made people using smaller bits of magic. The simplest explanation is that the gods are made of big magic rocks and people are made of magic dust. Having a divine heart just makes you more magical. And Salas continues, she goes, in fact, the first people of Bohemia practically had divine hearts themselves.

They were much more magical than us. Before the pact of the gods kept them away from the material plane, people walked the earth with gods even went to war with them. All I know about right now is a single divine heart and there are four of you. It wouldn't get you to Godhood, but it would put you on par with the people who got the closest. I'm with the gift. If we can use this divine heart to help the people of Bohemia, I think we have to do it. Yeah, I mean, I certainly echo your apprehension, Beverly, but at the same time, I got a wonder, if there's divine heart out there, at the very least, we may want to locate it so that it does not find a more

nefarious husk. The only does not need three friggin' hearts, okay? That's true. I do not need my villain thrice upgraded. Yes, that is a worry that I had as well. If suddenly I have this memory, do other Gith have it? Does the other know about it? You know any bad Gith that you think will blab? You know any blabby Gith? Do I, a gossipy Gith?

Who have not met Rachel. Rachel is a lot. She's always gabbing. She sounds kind of hot though, right? I mean, when your entire collective race is one giant group chat, I guess people are gonna gal. People are gonna start separate threads and channels. That's just how it's gonna be.

Yeah, I think that we gotta get this heart in our bag before Theala places it in whatever qualifies for a time-out sack for her and the chosen. Yeah. Yes, and I know you're being chased by various horsemen and whatnot, but perhaps this could even help you deal with them. Great. I've had enough horses in my life, truly.

We can all use a little break from horses. You know what? my life truly. We can all use a little break from horses. Salis just quietly hates horses. Connect with her deeply. Salis, a quick question for you. Do you think that this heart is in a god that's dead or is it still living God that's been sealed away. So the extremely strange thing about this is that I don't know. Like I said, usually when someone in our mental network knows something, we all know it and we understand it fully. This is a hazy memory, which is new for me to say the least. I think I'll do that to you.

Trust me. Yeah, I was gonna say, maybe whoever knew this just got a little drunk, kind of lost a memory there. Interesting. Lots of stuff is hazy for all hard one. Perhaps it was the incessant singing of this. She pulls out the turbo Timituna.

If I play here. Oh, friend. If I just play here. Yeah. Yeah, I must be destroyed. I cast a blindness deafness on everyone, so no one has to hear that. Oh, sweet relief. So, real quick, Salis, so we'll definitely go investigate this, and I promise whatever we find, we'll send your postcard.

We'll re-enter it into your collective CPU. I am definitely curious about this, but I will say I'm not doing this for my own pursuit of knowledge. I'm doing this because you saved my life and I owe you a great debt. And I've been following your progress and the decisions that you've made about the Nine Hells were empathetic in a way that I had not considered and I believe the three of you are special. So you're saying you're a fan. I know what to do with the Nine Hells decisions. I mean, yeah, you thought that it would be good to make it into a demolition derby, that

counts for something. It feels like that sort of wasn't the way to go in the end. I feel like you had a pretty heavy hand in a hard one. Uh, Luke honest, I think it's time to put me down. I need to walk away. Cool. Before we leave, I was wondering, is this astral worm? Is he a celestial, an elemental, a fey, or a fiend?

He is an elemental construct, yes. An elemental construct. Salis, y'all got anything in the astral plane that's been nagging at ya? Well, we do have our ongoing battle with the mind-flares in the elder brain. Because I could potentially bind this worm to my service for the day and tell them to go after the mind flares. That would be fantastic. Wow. Oh, I thought I've been sitting out here just meditating on having to work

with the githy onki to defeat the mind flares. And then we had this whole attack by the worm. I thought we were all completely screwed and we're gonna have to come together. But nope, this is just a win for Salis. Okay great. What are Husk buds for? Yeah, you know what happens in the Husk.

Then I guess I wanna try and cast Plain or Binding on the astral worm and tell him to spend the next 24 hours going after mine fliers. What kind of what kind of saved does the astral worm do? Charisma saving throw to be day 21. That is a natural five. I'm going to say this thing isn't going to burn a legendary resistance because it's kind of in autopilot mode. So you see it's mouth opens up and you guys suddenly feel a rush of air

as the thing starts hurtling through the sky. Everybody give me dexterity saving throws. I turn to Lukana and I say, you know, this is the kind of cool shit she does all the time. Lukana's desperately trying not to fall into the dark of this. The ground's so slippery.

It's like it's made of pasta or something. The Rigatoni hapatrade muffy. I got a 17. That is a 22. It's a seven for Bev. Yikes. You guys see Beverly starts to fly back into that this to fall back into the big play.

Belly again. You go to Thorn with him and at the exact same time Lucana saved on his deck save so you grab Bev it slows him down for a second Lucana's reaches his arm out touches your shoulder and all of you guys teleport out of the things belly and land safely like back in its cave. Woo! Wow! You simply need to give a warning before you do something like that, my daughter. I'm back in New Connises arms.

I'm in hard-wired thoughts. I thought maybe I had been telegraphing it, what with the long conversation about mod flares and their morality, but perhaps that was more of a private moment that I wasn't poison. You see, Saliscus, thank you. I owe you even more now, having the astral worm hunt down the mind flares will be... Again, it's only going to be for 24 hours, but we can hope that the astral worm will get a taste for mind flares, so that after a day he'll be so used to it.

You know, if you eat a certain meal enough, you kind of start to crave it. As you guys are talking about mind-flares and stuff, go ahead and give me insight checks. Oh no. Mmm. I hate an insight check. 24. That's gonna be a six.

Shout out to the two crew. Munchine, as you think about it, you think the simplest explanation for what Salis is talking about, where she has this vague memory of a Divided a did it could be that yep Yeah, I still think someone got your two drunk at a party. I Rolled the two so I also think that

That is always possible this is it's likely I at first thought that perhaps there was some sort of Cool witchcraft surrounding this divine heart and it being sealed away, but it's possible that this memory has just been eaten by a mind-flair. However, was that mind-flair and sentivized to eat a certain memory that we do not know? And if the memory was eaten,

how is it that they're able to recover it now unless the heart wants us to find it or there's a third party at play. Well, I think we just have to find it ourselves. Can I do an inside check, though, that if there's any way to reclaim a memory eaten by a mind-flair, I'm just curious. I got a three.

Munchen, you think if you went to that party that everybody got too drunk at, you could talk to enough people that you could piece the story together. Y'all, what is alcohol, but a mind flier? Can Hardwood try to write a quick slam poem about finding a memory that doesn't belong to you, but that's painful, but resurfacing the memory

and exploring it for what it's worth to someone that thought it wasn't worth anything and tried to discard it. I think he just did. But also Planner binding takes an hour, so you've got to have your work on that plan poetry. Slam my man's lamb. I play, I play Jojo Shell like Bongo's to accompany the poem. I do some like screechy violin on the unnew Betsy.

Yeah, you see. We're to the thoughts go. Salas Nadsen goes, this is my favorite Papa Roach song. Avoid you can't avoid. The void you can't avoid. Hard one. He's on fire.

How? See now that is you don't need to be able to read to come up with beautiful poetry like that. I love that. Perhaps I was wrong about you after all. She touches your chin. Argon, Luke on his spin us. Spinzy back around.

I went my hair. But you see Salis points to Beverly and goes, I think Beverly might be on to something. The fact that I'm able to remember something about it suggests that whatever powers that be that may have sealed this thing away might be trying to reach out in some way. And we don't know if the people reaching out are friend or foe. They could be luring us into this divine heart for a trap or maybe they've triggered something because if the Allah is going for it currently. So what if we just go in totally naive and sweet and if they end up being assholes then we'll look like good marks and they'll they'll come to us real easy. It's never failed us before.

Clear eyes full hearts. That is true. Yeah. Clear head full hearts. 60 eggs. It's true, yeah, clear head, full heart. 60 eggs. Sweet. So, Jonathan is still there with you guys. Jonathan lets you guys know that he needs to get back to Glade Home to be able to research things and to be able to put together a scroll. Oh, his mouth is full of fig newtons, so he can't tell.

Exactly. Yeah. Jonathan, Jonathan, go with Melora's cold shoulder. Let me give you diamonds a quick buff before you head out. I want you to shine like the goddamn sun, kid. We definitely gotta keep that. We definitely, I'm gonna take away one spell component because we're definitely sending that belly button ring

with Jonathan. Sweet. Absolutely. You guys do know that Jonathan, as a wizard, does not have plane shift prepped. So you guys, I'll say you were able to do a zealous trance while you were waiting to do the planar binding and get the worm to go up to the mind flares.

All aboard the moon shine express. Ladies and gentlemen, keep your hands inside the vehicle wall. We plane shift and we go. Beth, can you get in a little flight attendance costume? I'm already changed. Okay. Thank you so much. I have peanuts, I have tarot chips,

and of course I have popcorners. It's all three pieces. Wow, even if I'm not coming on the plane shift, may I have some popcorners? You may, they are sulfur-flavored popcorners, strangely enough. Fascinating, I didn't know there was so many ways to enjoy sulfur. Fire and room stone, some popcorners.

Starts to eat them. Moonshank, could you turn into a pregnant hawk and maybe get some eggs to go to these popcorners? Wow, thank you so much. Oh, by Lord. Well, popcorners and a bunch of eggs, that's quite most Ron Cheros. There are baby birds in here. I'm going to raise these. Salas looks at them with an arched brow and that begins sweeping. That's right. Think about what y'all been eating.

Switch to old milk y'all. It is more ethical. There's nothing better in life than being a bird's father. I wish you well, Salas. Right. Well, good luck. I hope I'm not leading you into a trap of some kind. I just know what's... Ha!

Well, I truly, I don't know what's going on, but if there is a divine heart, perhaps you all could use it in some capacity in the way the Allah has. I think the only way you're going to be able to beat somebody that is a god is to become Titans yourself. Salus, you know what, no matter what happens, I think we found someone else with the divine heart and I pointed Salus's heart. You see, Salus looks down at her chest,

then looks back at you and goes, I didn't like that. And that actually sucks to hear because I thought about it for a long time. Wow. You know, hard one, you're exploring your creativity and I think that's important. You know, sometimes you're gonna hit, sometimes you're gonna miss, but you're exploring. Hard one on paper, I don't understand why that failed, but I felt the same thing. Salis felt when you said it. What it, what it wreaked of effort was the problem.

Yeah. The thing is, it's like you've just started poetry and you're trying to perform it. It's like taking your first guitar lesson, then doing a show, just feel free to be quiet, man. Thank you for the note. Let's remember that all criticism should be constructive and framed in the form of a compliment. We'll talk to you later. Very well, Salis. Very well.

Very well. Enjoy your warm. So Moonshan Plainships, you guys, you guys arrived back in Glade Home. Oh, wait, what kind of entertainment do we have on the fly today? A hard one. Do you think it? Because Bev's working the cart.

Canning out snacks, you think you could drum up something for entertainment? I have like a quick slam poem, suspended animation. What is reincarnation? Where in the nation are we going? And what is inflation? Sorry, I whispered in moonshine.

I've got a copy of the Lincoln Lawyer I could play. If that's better. Yeah, please put it up. Please put it up. Rob wrote blank and turn it up. We're gonna have you jacked in this one. It really puts on the Lincoln lawyer. And Art would immediately sit down and stop singing. And we're here, y'all.

You guys arrive back in Glade Home. You see that the mages have already begun building up the temple out of which Tonethin and the monks once worked. They're essentially adding an addition to the side of the university. You see several of the Glyath monks are directing construction here while Balnor is off to the side being led in yoga by several of the monks. They're gonna open up them, dad.

Yeah, for our post, it's open up my hips. It's They're gonna open up them, dad hips. Yeah, frog pose. It's open up my hips. It's open up my hips. It hurts so bad. I'd probably morph him into a frog. I eat your two frog. It was reals better. Balnoriwag.

Yeah, you guys see Balnor runs up and rejoins you guys. And Tonithin once again tells you guys that it's gonna take him a couple of days to finish the scroll, but you see Lucanus puts his hand on Tonithin's shoulder and goes nonsense. It'll take one day, we'll work around the clock, we'll have this scroll ready for you. My daughter, you will be able to cast this spell,

maybe not tomorrow night, but the morning after that. Did PayPal lose just initiated pop swap with him in Bound or? It's a scoop swap. He picks up Tonithin and puts down hard one. All right, then. And Sean, you're rubbing off on him. You guys see Tonithin and Luconis run off and join the other monks and go into the newly constructed library and they immediately start getting to work.

Talk about a couple bookworms. That's hilarious, man. Hold me, Valnor. I'm really small. That's true. Sorry. You got this, Valnor. Is this a new thing? I wasn't here.

There's no kind of like new inside jokes or anything is there. I wouldn't say jokes, but I'm sort of a slam poet now. Oh, just nothing's really funny about it. Shoot's nervous glances at Moonshine at Beverly. Is this real? I give him one of those smiles that you only reveal half your mouth.

Just like only the bottom teeth. Oh, okay. Really excited to hear him. Hard one, but I'm sure we've got big things coming up. Just a total bottom tooth smile with shaky eyes that have fear in them. Speaking of big things, I have a couple slam-bombs

about big things. Oh. But yeah, we can save them until trans time. No, we can do it later. Yeah, I think saving for the hut. Oh, if we want that, if we want that, the Mordecaidance Magnificent Mansion, we're gonna have to take it back

from refugees is the problem. You know what, we can probably build our own tent. We could just camp or we can stay in the university. I'm sure Lou Gannis would let us. Part one's hands were around his hammer as we tried to and was saying that and then he's like, oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, we'll sleep forever. We'll have to kick out any fanblies or any other.

I don't have to kick anyone out of that. Maybe we can sleep in the dorms. That'd be fun. Oh, okay. We'd each have our own little dorm, and then we could meet up in the hallway and talk about our classes and stuff like that. And maybe there'd be a common room

and we could make popcorn in it and that accidentally set up the fire alarm, just spitballing. One twin XL bed. Yeah. Ha ha ha ha. Sweet. Yeah, you guys talked to Lou Connist. hooks you guys up with like your own dorm room, and you guys get one big bunk bed.

Oh, we all want the top bunk. You guys all get in the top bunk, it immediately crashes down to the first one. Tum, tum, tum, tum. Ah, good thing no one of us slept down there, huh? You're muffled bound or screams under the mattress. Oh no. That's not good for his hips. We fished Balnor out. Flex on his hips while we explain the map that we got to him.

Great. Okay, so let's all have a little teda teta here. Can I do a history check on the area beyond Asmodia? Yeah. That's going to be a 21. A 21. Bev, you know that this is where, if you are looking at the globe, this is essentially where the southern tip of the world would meet like

the northern tip, or you'd like essentially go so far south that you would hit like the frigid north. Damn. Wow. I pull out Ophgargo's punch and I add a page with this information in it to trick them into looking at it. Okay, great. Do you mind if I just get Erdan to stop by just to ask him real quick about just sealing off gods and if he knows anything about that practice at all? Yeah, that'd be great. Why don't you summon him?

I actually owe him an apology breakfast anyway for endangering the entire city. Then I can summon him tomorrow morning. I can send him an animal messenger and ask him to come back Yeah, I was doing a policy brunch with him an apology war room brunch with Erdan How does that sound great great? I can send Kaka if you'd rather moonshine if you want to save us I love to see Kaka where's Kaka? All right hard one goes to the window and whistles for Kaka Go ahead and give me an animal handling check hard one with advantage or with disadvantage

Sorry for asking Okay, so that's a 13 It's really not rolling with disadvantage hard one you whistle out the window and you do they're not Crows they're not blackbirds, but you see some birds outside They're not blackbirds, but you see some birds outside. All right, cool. I'll call to them. Kakao's clearly playing with his friends, guys. Hey, Kakao, bring her down around here tomorrow morning

and careful with his little bone cat. All right, bud. Enjoy hanging with your friends and come home before the street lights come on. All right. Can I guess be with animals? All right. Enjoy, enjoy hanging with your friends and come home before the street lights come on. Alright, you're crazy bird. I start speaking in bird. Is any of y'all cock-a? Hello? No?

No, there's no cock-a. Not for me, but I need a... Oh, you never met a cock-a? Nope. Okay, so when this man who's screaming at you and human, was that mean to you? Confusing. Okay, great, thank you so much.

Thank you for everything. Enough with this week in Munchan, I'm trying to go to sleep. Okay, goodnight folks. Oh, he's trashing. Oh, that one's fast asleep. Hard one just climbs into the chair to pretend like he's being cradled by Lucana.

That's interesting. Deep trance. He just made a pillow, dad. So you guys all go to sleep from the night and get your trances in and you guys wake up the next day. Sun is shining. Again, you guys are in within the bubble of Glade Home. I'm going to do my trick where I make a hero's beast and then I go trance again Oh, some metagaming bullshit sure Go ahead and give me for the sake of my friends. You can mark off one of your spell components to do that cool Moonshine Do you have the 10,000 gold worth of gems that's separate from the gold? to do that. Cool. Moonshine wakes up really. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, the weather within the protective bubble of gleeed home. So you guys have not been experiencing

the elements to the degree that you would if you were down on the surface. And even iron deep, hard one when you were down there working in the mines, gleeed home was positions like right over it. So you guys weren't even getting like mudslides or water coming in really at all. So yes, so you guys wake up the next morning. You guys send for Erdan and you see after a little bit Erdan knocks on the door. You see through a little people in your dorm. And Erdan from the other side goes, I hope Beverly's not in there. I'm not, I'm in the common room making the biggest, blackest, darkest pot of coffee Erdan has ever smelled. That's a full-bodied roast.

And I'm walking slowly towards Erdan desperately trying not to spill this coffee. And I say, good morning. See, I heard a perception check for Erdan, and if he fails, he's gonna freak out. Make Beverly Roll to see if he's built a coffee. That's a natural four, you see your day goes, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,

this is arms up, Bev, go ahead and give me a deck saving throw. DC 15 to keep the coffee. That's a 23, Bev, you like fully drop the pot of coffee, but it does not spill. It stays completely vertical. You jump down and you hold your hand out and you catch it. And because of your resistance to fire damage,

you barely even feel it. It just looks impressive. And our Dan goes, whoa, man, that was pretty cool. Uh huh, yep. You're cool. Uh-huh. Yep. Very nice. Get up, get up. It helps you up. Good morning.

First and foremost, I would like to apologize for endangering the city. I know better now and I will strive to protect you and everyone that needs protecting as is my charge, as a knight of Bahumia. Would you like some coffee, it's French roast. French roast, I wouldn't. Beverly, thank you so much.

The French are you the kiss. Thoughtful of you, you usually just give weird drinks like beans or milk or something that just make things worse. I open the door, Bev, you got my beans. Open what? Hard one wakes up, uh, Bev, we're the beans. Excuse wide. Why? Part one wakes up. Uh, but we're the beans.

Excuse me for a moment. I hand him the extremely hot pot. Ah! Tee uses my hand to catch it. Well, I see this is this beans thing. It's kind of just a you guys thing. So I suppose I- What?

I am beans in all my teeth. I know there's a lot of pressure on you, Beverly. I apologize for being rude to you these past few days. I've been under a lot of pressure and the sword situation was quite a scare, but your teenager, teenagers make mistakes. I know I have, and you guys know like Erdance whole backstory and he doesn't know that you know his backstory.

Yeah, just some minor things that I did. Not a big deal. Not what? No, I'm sure you never made any mistakes. I'm sure that what? Yeah, you like dinged your dad's car. Yeah, he's a little stuff. He's gonna make an insight check. Um, you see he his eyes and then it's kind of wide into them and goes, ah yes, adventurers, you all find ways of figuring things out. All right. Well, thank you for the coffee. Apology accepted.

Best of luck, everyone. Oh, Erdan, I'm guessing you came by because you got my rat. Yes. Rat. Yes, it was concerning, I squealed. You mean my bird. Well, we are going down south, technically so far south we're going north. If you know what I mean.

And we are after a potentially sealed away divine heart. And I was wondering if you had any recollection in all your understanding of the history of Bohumia and the practices of the many people that share this great Planet if you had any context of People sealing away gods or rogue gods or Divine Heart separated from their being or anything any practices that might be involved in something like this. He's gonna go ahead and roll the history check. You see he thinks about it for a moment and he goes I don't know of any divine hearts on the material plane if you've found out about

one it's news to me. There is a pact amongst the gods that prevents them from entering the material plane. But there are workarounds. There was one such goblin god named Bargurvik who ascended to godhood by overthrowing the original God of Goblins and stealing its divine heart, since Bargavik himself wasn't part of the pact of the gods, he, like the Allah, was able to come down to the material plain. And that's the God that Melora had her way with. Yes, once you guys hear this stuff about the Goblin God, you guys are reminded of the

first time that you met Salis when you guys were in the God husk. This was the husk of Bargavik, the goblin god. This is the god that Melora got her divine heart from. That's right. I think we've been inside this guy. Oh, it's so sad. Does the Erdan looks baffled? Excuse me? And so that is why Melora may traipse this plane.

Is that why? Because the divine heart that she acquired is from this goblin. You see Erdan nods. There's certainly precedent for God's finding workarounds for getting to the material plane. Well, I don't think Melora didn't do it as a workaround, did she?

Hi. It's Melora bad. Tell me, you have to tell me if she's bad. There's nothing inherently wrong with a workaround. I think Melora probably just went thrift shopping for divine hearts and found a good deal. Absolutely. Getting something on sale is not an issue. Exactly. See, her dad gets like a weird side out of hard one,

and then puts his hand down and Moonshan showed her, and he goes, best of my knowledge, Malora is a protector of this room. Okay, all right, thank you so much for your counsel, Erdan. All right, it's wealth, thanks for the coffee. Absolutely, yeah, would you like some to go? Oh, I'm sorry, was I supposed to just drink

the whole pot in these five seconds? No, I can make you a thermos, is what I'm saying. Oh, yes, sure, I would appreciate that. Cool, I go and steal a thermos from the common room. Take a thermos, it says like, property of the university across it, do not remove from kitchen and Erdan just looks at it with narrowed eyes.

That's gonna come out of your security deposit. You know what you get away with this one toe gold? I guess it's technically yours. You work for the university. True. You see Erdan walks off. Oh, before we go, Boundor. Yeah, and I pull out a Miss Breaker, which I guess I won't be needing anymore since I have Bird's

layer. Whoa, you got another hand me down for me, bud. It can't be down for your dad. A dad view. There's no graceful way to do this, but yes, I am giving you my trash. As the one who guards the bags, I consider this an honor. Takes Mistbreaker. It's a plus two weapon.

Boundhouse, no doubt about that. Special weapon. Well, okay, is there anything else we need to do in Glade Home or should we suit up, put on our parkas and our big fluffy boots and head on out? I'm just gonna shout out on this normal amount of eggs that moonshine whipped up. That looks pretty damn good.

Actually, I was pretty inspired by salads, so I did separate the yolks from the whites, and I made a multi-colored omelet, sort of tier miso. Oh, an egg omelet? Yeah. Sal is amazing. She's so smart, but why do you separate the eggs

and then add the yolks? It's just such a waste of eggs. I know, I mean, I tried it. It felt really stupid, although the visual of an egg to your misu is... No, but then you make it look like a big egg. You got like the white on the outside and then it's all yellow on the inside.

Oh, I see, exactly. The fault was in the preparation, I see. I see. Right. Yeah. Tomorrow. Moonshine, I noticed you have the yellow and the white and somehow there's also brown in the eggs. What's going on with that? Oh, I just crumbled some dry leaves, sort of like a salsa thing. Love it. I'll sort of just the brown, brown's the best part. We all know the brown's the best part. Best part of any egg brown. Brown's the best part. We all know the Brown's the best part best part of any egg brown I thought yeah, that's true also cricket cricket eggs come with little brown in there

Other people eat around the brown, but I chow down on the brown. Yeah, good town on the brown. It was brown You jet out you all get extremely sick, but you still have the benefits of a hero's feet Well, we're immune to being poisons. So we poison ourselves. It wouldn't be poison otherwise. Yeah. Shall we head to the stormboard? Hey, yeah, I got this playlist ready to go. Let's go on the fucking air. Get on the air.

The Lincoln Lawyer soundtrack. You said you were a slam poet now. I haven't thought of everything. Okay. But also, hard one, trust your untrained instinct because you could be the eE Cummings of slam poetry, you know, your break in the rules. I, I look, I feed off positivity.

So keep those compliments, eE Cummings, if you can. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, Bound or vomit. So you guys go off towards the stormborne. You guys find it and you see that in the days since hard one has been going down to iron deep and excavating that the dwarves have fixed it up a bunch so it doesn't have as many holes in it or anything. It looks a lot better. They ruined it You see your old buddy Nerman the dude who was at the doorfinish with you It was a really nice guy is just in there

But with like a little work belt just nailing in a plank. Hey, we redid the floors for you, bud. We didn't quit it What? Nerman? The deck. it was a mess. You ruined it. This is just how my dad had it. Fuck. I was trying to up a plank. I get a Nerman and Diamond. Thank you, he's called Charm. God damn it.

Anyway, see you later, buddy. Waves to you. Hey, Nerman, where are you going? Here, have some hero's face. You want to come with us? Yeah, I mean, if you want me are you going? Here, have some hero's face, you won't come with us. Yeah, I mean, if you want me and a couple of other, wait, first off, you're leaving, you're taking the ship off into the insane storm out there?

I guess we are. Yeah, you guys look out beyond. So you guys like Ezri, Glade Home has this protective arcane bubble around it. And you see rain and lightning beyond the bubble, like just outside of where like these airships are docked. How long does it look like it goes for?

I mean, you know, Theala set off a cataclysm. There's just storms everywhere. But you also know that this ship, based on just like things that red has bragged about and stuff and things that you guys have talked about, this ship was specifically known for going through storms. It is either... Ah, stormborne, that's where it comes from. This is a hard weather ship, okay? I think we're going to be just fine. By the way, you know, my name is actually stormborne. So I think I'm gonna be thriving out there as well.

Okay. Is this like when you try to get everybody to call you Skippy? It's Nerman, it's not anything like that at all. Because I know D-E-Nerman turns to the other guy as soon as he goes, because this guy would have like a new nickname for himself every week. And the one time he picked Skippy, and that was the only one that people used,

and everyone called him Skippy for like 10 years. Look, guys, the Torpenich was rife with rumors. You can't believe everything you heard coming out of Iron Deep. I sidle up next to Hardwine and say, so did you not want this bully-wug rain jacket we made you? Does it say? You're a question specifically for me and pop out of make this. Rain?

If it says Skippy on the back, that is mine. I just can't breathe. Hahaha. Hahaha. Quietly still wants to be Skippy. Hahaha. So yeah, you see Nerman grabs a few other dwarves. It would probably be helpful to have a little bit of a crew.

So, yeah, you guys have like a few dwarven sailors walk around, instantly start scuffing up the deck and start just like spitting everywhere. Oh, good, that's more like it. Yeah, that's good. Get a little dirty on here, huh? So Skippy takes his place at the helm. You guys take off in your airship,

following the coordinates to the point that Salis gave you. This is gonna be a long day of travel you guys have been Living in an actual bubble so you've not been experiencing The ongoing kind of apocalypse as soon as you guys leave the arcane bubble It's this awful storm. Oh right before we do that. I appoint Nerman my first mate He looks super proud and salutes you. Here here, Skippy. A tearol's done my cheek.

You guys see lightning crashing. You see the choppy water of the ocean deep below you, building up to huge tsunamis and crashing into the rocks of nearby shores. This trip is going to take you guys a few hours. So hard one, go ahead and give me a raw proficiency check. So plus whatever your proficiency is, what is it at level?

Oh, by the way, the boobs are level 17. Woohoo! And so it is plus six now. Plus six now. So go ahead and give me a raw proficiency check to see how you steer. Again, the stormborne is built for this. It is said to have been blessed by Cord himself.

Can I go out and be the sort of, you know the front of a ship, like the map, not the mask, but like the mermaid, that's the one. I just feel like I'm Cord's type, so I want to. Yeah, I want to be like the statue us at the prowl yeah, I want to be like the the statuess at the prowl cool

You see some flirty crashes of lightning near you I'm just trying to get us that favor while we can I am going around and offering all of the dwarves pop corners and Terrible just just popcorn flying everywhere screaming over the storm. Do you want any popcorn? Just popcorn flying everywhere, screaming over the storm. Do you want any popcorn? Yeah, bro, I'm like a lawyer. The DVD is soaked. We've ruined our DVD player. Founder's screaming with a raincoat on.

I use the sale as a projection screen. Hard one, what did you get on your check to drive? Court gave me a dirty 20 oh Probably because he likes your proud that proud got some wow Go ahead and roll me a D4 of Cataclysmic challenges as you guys ride through this storm We're gonna have we're gonna play it out like individual events just because that's what the mechanics serve

But this is kind of accumulated damage. This is things that are happening over hours And I'm hoping that I can you spells to mitigate stuff even though we're doing it all at once I can kind of use spells to mitigate certainly if you want to whip out like a super high level spell Yeah, to try to stop the weather or something you can do that you're a very powerful druid roll the one. Oh, that is the best. You can roll. Dang, I guess I'm gonna hang on to my high level druid spells and powerful ones going roll like that. I didn't want to take Moonshan off the prowess. She's pretty perfect right there. Guys, go ahead and roll me a D6. Five. So you guys go, it is smooth sailing figuratively.

It is very rocky sailing, but there is nothing that you guys don't get hit by lightning. You guys see the world coming apart around you, like pieces of earth breaking off from the main continent and just like disappearing into the ocean. So Nami's coming up and just washing away the shore, but you guys up in your ship, which seems to be blessed by the God of Storms himself, are riding through the storm.

Stomach feels rock solid too. It's that terablu-based layer. It's gonna stay off sea sickness. But suddenly, you guys begin to feel the wind picking up even more so, and it seems to be controlling a little bit where the boat is going. Like it's fighting you a little bit hard one. As you turn the wheel, it is taking you rapidly in whatever direction you're spinning and it's shaking back and forth, and the dwarves are having to hang on to stay up. Barehand, Norman. You guys suddenly feel a gust of wind in the wrong direction as you're turning the wheel and you guys enter a tail spin.

The boat begins spitting out of control and you guys begin plummeting. You guys are all hanging on as the wind pushes back against you and you guys get to the point where you were a few hundred feet in the air Now you're just a few dozen feet in the air just as a title wave is about to crest up and hit the ship Hard one you're finally able to write it Everybody go ahead and give me strength saving throws to stay on as a title wave hits the SS storm I think I'm going to we got a lot of Del could crew with us. I think I'm gonna control winds and updraft us away from this title wave.

Ah, sweet, go ahead and give me an Arcona check. Okay, Arcona's good when I got my cap on. Mm-hmm, and please make it work, because I did roll it too. Okay. Oh no. 21. Hard one, Bevan Balnor, and all the dwarves

are looking up as this tidal wave rises about to consume the SS stormborne then at the last second, moonshine holds her hand up and blows a gust of wind into the sails, rocketing it back up into the air. The boat rocks as you crash into the tip of the tsunami just as it breaks avoiding the seas' wrath.

Watch a crick-brick wind! Hard one puts his captain hat on moonshine. Balloon laughs hysterically. So you guys are able to get back up into the air and fly without too much more drama and you get back to the coordinates that Salis laid out for you. But you guys don't see anything yet. It's just cloudy skies with all this rain and lightning. Everybody go ahead and give me a perception check. Goodness, it's gonna be a 20. 25. 15. Hard one you're concentrating on keeping the ship aloft.

Bev and moonshine, you guys look up amongst the clouds and you see that one of them looks strange. As you fly past it, you see that it's not three dimensional. It looks almost as if someone painted a cloud in the sky. Can I cast the spell magic on it? Sure. I know some hallucinatory stuff that is fourth level so I'm gonna cast a fourth level spell magic on it. Sweet go ahead and give me a roll. Okay so higher than fourth level I see. It's gonna be a 22. Moonshine, you hold your hand up, you cast a spell magic on the strange cloud and you see that a whole

appears in it through which you can see clear sky but it looks like kind of blurry. It looks like this is some kind of gate. Oh y'all want to just dive in there or can we I know this is reckless but should we just aim the airship at it? Should we throw a diamond through first? Maybe something low, what about a fig newton and not a diamond? Don't waste the new ins. I reach for a fig newton,

but accidentally grab a diamond and throw it. You throw a yelmucha, I know! Until I realize it's only a diamond. He's just a diamond. He's just a diamond. I'm sorry! It's just a diamond. It was just a diamond and I couldn't get it out of my head. My fingers just listened to what it had. You see, the dwarves just watched this 300 gold diamond earring fly through the air. Don't worry, don't worry guys, it was a diamond.

It was only a diamond. What do you mean, you're so valuable? I know, I held up the Newton. He's more precious than gold. We're now down to 21, I held up the Newton. He's more precious than gold. We're now down to 21, we've spelt the phone. More precious than gold's gold pretzels. You throw it through and you see it disappears into the gate.

OK, wait, should we throw one of us tied to a rope through it? I tie myself to a rope and make wink, wink, nod, nod, kind of eyes at the hole. You bow. I throw Moonshine like a football. Jesus Christ. Go ahead and give me a strength check, our level winner.

Our athletics check. Don't mind if I do, that's a 36. Oh my God. You guys see. Do I make this sound of one of those nerf, 36. Oh my god. You guys see, do I make this sound of one of those nerf, some more text? Some more text, yeah.

Hard one, you pick up, you have like your hand on Moonshine's hip holding her over your head, you whip the ship, so you have the momentum of the ship, as you toss her, she hits the wind and flies through that portal I'm attacking to a to a rope to like a kite

You guys Immediately feel the rope go limp and moonshine is gone Well She would go in the bad water skiing on Nerman hard one. She had the rest have water skiing. Um, Nerman. Hard one. She had the rest of the tarot chips. What are we doing? She's dead. Oh my god. She's dead.

Nerman, bring the ship about. That's our, that's our figure head out there. One proud down. Follow her. Follow her. I jump on jaw jobs. Wait, did I hear a faint, did they hear a faint worrying of a, uh, nerve vortex? Yeah, they heard a faint worrying and that went away. But it's gone now. It's gone, yeah.

I should have never fucking el-waited her out to the portal. As soon as the rope goes limp, I jump on Jaja and pursue through the portal. Sweet. Are you taking the stormborne? Are you guys going without the stormborne? Yeah, we're taking the stormborne and Beverly is on a turtle.

Um, wait, do I have time to do any crafting last night? Um, no. I guess you did, yeah, you guys rested at the funnest one of crafteds. I can't say, yeah, because I'm missing. Okay, so moonshine has gone missing. The rest of you guys, Beverlyly leading the way on Jaja. Fly fearlessly into the portal. Hard one on the stormborne with all the dwarves.

Why do we throw a mood shot? Let's make sure it's safe. We'll throw our favorite character. First we'll throw a diamond, then we'll throw one of us. Really sick. OK. So it's throw one of us. Truly sick. Okay, so it's perfect order of operations. I don't know what you're talking about. So moonshine is ahead of the other guys.

So we're gonna start with moonshine. So moonshine, you have this rope around you. As soon as you go through this cloud gate, you feel yourself enter another world hidden in this pocket of the sky. As you emerge on the other side, you see that the sky is clear. It's a beautiful day here as if the Allah's cataclysm never happened. That's the first thing you notice. The second thing you notice is that your rope has been cut by entering this gate and you begin plummeting. A wild shape and do a vulture. A munchie turns to a vulture and begins flying.

Hard one and Bev, you guys show up a second later. You see, Munchie is not there. There's just a vulture. A pregnant vulture. Oh, you see that it's pregnant. I put my spyglass away and I say, don't worry. What do you mean she's dead? My god god the vulture's are swarming? No, that vulture is pregnant as fuck

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Okay that's it for me, go team pants and enjoy the show. The dwarves are blown away. These guys are just regular kind of sailors. They've seen crazy monsters and stuff on the sea probably, but have definitely not seen an entire new world. You guys look out and you are in this heavenly abyss. You are now high above the clouds. You are not there before. Now you've like risen way high into the air. I hope we are in like theala's realm. Deep below you, you guys no longer see ocean,

just the fog of fluffy white clouds. Poking through them, you see mountains on both sides of you. You're essentially in this big heavenly valley. And in the middle, you see floating shrines, these large ostentatious buildings on floating platforms with beautiful, immaculate gardens. You just from far away, you guys just see like green gardens and trees and stuff. The different shrines all have different color patterns. There's a couple dozen of them. You see one has green and gray banners running down the side of an entrance, others with blue

and red and black, and you see the grandest of all is a gold temple. Everybody go ahead and give me perception checks as you look out onto this strange world. That's a 12. I got a strange world. That's a 12. I got a nat one. I got a 13. I really want to sniff around for milk, but... So all of you guys are looking around, and you guys are all just kind of distracted

by the splendor of it all. But you see that there is life here. You'll have to get closer to the individual shrines and stuff to get a handle on what's going on here, but you do see a hard one especially with the highest roll a big 13 You do see big flying Monsters in the distance. Oh, I'm so glad I stalked Earth Pine today. I'm so glad I made a playlist for this. Mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, mm, So, Sue them by coming back on Asa Vulture and on wild shaping everything except for my Vulture wings and my Vulture being everything is okay, my friends. They immediately become vomiting over the side of the ship.

Ballnor looks out and he goes, what is this place? It almost seems like some sort of nexus. I'm seeing lots of different platforms and shrines with different banners. Can I try to do a history check to see if I can identify any of the banners, maybe I can do like a low swoop on jaw jaw.

Bev, go ahead and give me a history check. And Papa's gonna do a perception check using his scent to smell milk. Okay. He will really poorly, I got another nat one. He doesn't smell that. Okay. He rolled really poorly. I got another net one. He doesn't smell that. I got a seven, but also a net one.

Me, eh? Me, eh? It's okay. Good boy. He smells eggs on you. All right. All right. You know what?

I tried to live that salad's life, and I'll be honest. It was eggy. I huff the clouds, and it turns out the clouds are made of milk. So that's probably throwing off your scent. Thank you so much, Bev. I was confused. I got a 12 on my history. 12 on your history.

You look out at the different colors of these shrines, Bev. And even with without having a ton of knowledge on the subject, you see in the distance some kind of flying monsters, different colored shrines, these colors line up to dragons. Dragons. I knew it! If we entered some sort of dragon realm? This rules.

Are the flying monsters we see winged co-bolts They are pretty far away right now. Let me know how you guys proceed You guys can just like park the stormborne often like a mountain range if you guys want to leave these dwarves behind or else you're gonna need to do like a pure stealth check to just do a Han Solo Fly casual try to like can I do I would like to do a history check about dragons and I would like to know which one likes diamonds the most okay great that's going to be a 19 a 19 the simplest explanation that you know is that in general metallic dragons were more open to humanoids and

monochromatic dragons like green dragons red dragons blue dragons white dragons black dragons tend to be more evil and you get the sense, I mean, metallic dragons hoard as well. So you get the sense that a gold dragon would want your diamonds, a black dragon

would want your diamonds. So we are, we got a big target painted on our back. Oh, I wasn't even thinking target, I was thinking we could go strike a deal. We've got, I suppose not that many, but we've got a couple diamonds to spare. Yeah, for sure. For sure.

sort of making offering, we find a black dragon and say, hey, like... Well, if the metallic dragons are more friendly to humans, you think maybe we should try headed towards that gold shrine? Yes, I'm sorry. The tiny goth inside me really just wanted to go to the black dragon, because it's actually so cool. Oh, absolutely. But no, you're really just wanted to go to the black dragon cuz it's absolutely But no you're right we should go to a metallic one so right now you guys are off into the sky You are not near any specific shrine and again you guys will have to do a stealth check for the ship Which will be worse than any of your individual things if you guys yep, yeah, so whatever you guys want to do I don't think we want to leave the ship.

I mean, it just got repaired. It looks worse, but it just got repaired. What? It does look a little worse, Nerman. Could you go on a recon mission on Jojo? Oh yeah, Moonshine, do you want to go on a reconnaissance mission with me? Yeah, let's do it up. Hang on one second.

Let me see if I can summon my bird. I run up and I put my leg up on the side of the ship and I whistle for a ca ca Just a slight whistle that only ca ca ca could hear can I summon a bird using speak with animals just to make him feel better You guys don't see any birds Get picked out the sky Yeah, they are a tasty treat here. Um, hard one, as strong as your bond is with Kakao, perhaps Kakao is not safe here. Yeah, no, I've got Kakao's safety front and center myself

as well, and I agree. Yeah, okay. Uh, that bird's not safe here. I feel a pit in my stomach would that he didn't tell. Okay, so yeah, I guess all hop on, I will hop on with jaw jaw and cast pass without trace. Can you lay some eggs real quick just in case we need those? I don't know, throw it a shrine.

Yeah, yeah, lay a couple eggs real quick, then I become moonshine and then I cast pass without trace and then I hop on jaw jaw. It's a lot for these dwarfs to stomach. Okay. Sweet, so you guys get on jaw jaw, moonshine casts pass without trace. I'll say let's just have jaw jaw roll,

your stealth check. Okay, so he gets just add plus 10. That's going to be a 29. Ooh. Sweet, so hard one, you start flying the ship off towards like the mountains away from where you see kind of flying monsters in the distance so that you're not detected.

Take a nice wide, wide loop. A wide loop. So Bevin' Looshine, you guys begin flying down on Jojo. Each of the colored shrines are on platforms, a couple hundred feet apart, and you see that on the monochromatic ones, the green shrine, the red shrine, the blue shrine, you see dragon-born guards in matching colors, standing guard.

These bipedal dragon people with thick armor and long glaves, keeping watch over the sky. Some of the dragon-born guard are doing drills or sparring, fighting in circles while the other ones observe. You also see that you guys are only catching this because you are like coming down from above the shrines, but a lot of them do have like tall bushes and trees and stuff that kind of obscure what the other guards and stuff from the other temples would be able to see. It looks like there might be some rivalries going on between the different shrines. But you guys land on the platform with the gold shrine, and you guys see that there are no dragonborn here at all.

Just long rows of flowers and a huge garden leading up to a shrine in the shape of a giant gold dragon. It's mouth open, acting as the doorway. On both sides of the mouth however you see tall gold gallums with spears crossing their weapons to block the way. I guess we should figure out if these are shrines to the dragons or if these dragonborns built the shrines to worship the creatures. But the gold one has no dragonborn there. That is true. So maybe we get a little closer and investigate that one. Yeah. While you guys

are looking at the shrine, hard one, you are taking a wide berth. Nerman, hang a regional please. Trying to keep the SS stormborn out of trouble. However, you are up in the air. You guys, even with not great perception checks, we're able to see other flying creatures in the distance. even with not great perception checks, we're able to see other flying creatures in the distance. Go ahead and give me a stealth check with advantage. This is just gonna be raw, it's gonna be a plus zero. Okay, let's hope the other one is, oh my good lord.

Do I add anything? Do I add my personal stealth or just raw? All right, why don't we add your proficiency as a ship master? Cause a captain. And I am proficient, thank you for asking, All right, why don't we add your proficiency as a ship master? Because it's a captain. And I am proficient. Thank you for asking, Nerman.

That's a 24. Okay. All right. Nerman, hang a Lucy, please. You guys start to fly low to kind of like hide in the clouds, because otherwise you're just in open water up here. You're very easy to find. I am going to go ahead.

These guys get as a group. I'm gonna average their perception. They get a plus 15 to perception. It's pretty good. So they need to roll a nine and eight or lower Roll it in front of Emily That is a natural seven

Hard one as you guys dip down into the clouds and Bev and moonshine you guys probably see this, as you guys kind of like take cover in the gardens of this gold shrine, you see a blue, a red and a green dragon, like this little crew, start flying out towards the portal, like as if they had just seen something and start like sniffing around. Oh, I'm trying to, did you see that?

Yeah, that was bad. Hmm. Okay, Bev, what do y'all think? We've done our recon, should we return to the ship and tell them the information that we retrieved or should we dig a little deeper? Well, here's what I'm thinking. If there are three dragons currently looking for our friends, I wonder if it's not a bad idea to try and get on the good side

of potentially the more strong dragons? I'm also curious if this metallic dragon is existing in a different political space than these monochromatic dragons. I mean, these monochromatic dragons have groups of dragon borns, and yet this gold dragon doesn't have any groups of dragonborns, and is supposed to be friendly or too humanoids. It's very true.

Yeah, I don't know if they've just done away with the workforce and they've fully automated. I think we can agree, Beth, that the only logical conclusion is that the gold dragon is automated. Meanwhile, Balnor and hard one in all of the dwarves are just in a ship in the middle of a cloud. Oh my God, the dragons are gonna find us, man. They're gonna find us.

Nerman, I've been doing that slam poetry thing again. What? I think we should risk it. I think we should try and learn a little more about the geopolitical landscape of Dragonopolis, which is what I'm tentatively calling it. Talk to the dragon? I think we should talk to the dragon.

Would you like to, would you like me to dispel these golems and we go inside or would you like us to just knock, knock? We got diamonds because we love you. I think good foot forward. We're just extremely disadvantaged. So I think we should at least try to ingratiate ourselves. Okay, what do you think? Okay, no, I'm into it.

I'm honestly into either plan. So here and that, you're into that. Gold Dragon, gold Dragon. So you guys right now, you guys are on the floating platform of the gold shrine. You see a long walkway to the shrine paved in gold. To the sides of you are various gardens filled with all manners of gold and yellow flowers.

You're surrounded by bright yellows and greens. Ash, we are going. I would like to make a show of casting plant growth on these yellow flowers. So I'm like my hands are doing that like gladiator through the fields thing and I'm making the flowers bloom more and more and more flowers. You make the flowers bloom more yellow flowers pop up behind you as you walk Overgrowing over the planters like on to the path behind you guys You guys approach the shrineters like on to the path behind you guys.

You guys approach the shrine itself and you see the golden mouth of the dragon is open to the sides of the mouth are two of these golden golems that look almost like Roman Legionnaires Helms with feathery bristles in the middle. They have their spears crossed over the entrance of the shrine and as you guys Walk up they pull their spears back. Oh Beth is there a part of you that wonders if we need to get hard one here to do this? I just worry about entering the mouth of this dragon metaphorical or not without hard one It is true that normally when we go inside a monster all three of us jump inside it. Yeah, it feels

wrong to enter a mouth and I have hard one a little bit. Can we send Jaw Jaw to go retrieve him? That's not a bad idea. Jaw Jaw, do you feel okay with that? That's okay with me. All right, if you die, I'll just summon you again. All right, that's pretty smart. All right, if you die, I'll just summon you again. All right, that's pretty smart. Yeah. I can't do that with pop-off. Hey, here. Yeah, keep pop-off safe.

Yeah. All right, we'll chill outside the temple. Great. We'll do some recon here. I'll just keep plant growth in. You guys stand outside the temple. Go ahead and roll a stealth check for Jaja as he goes into the fog to see if these dragons. Remember to add 10 because he's got past without trace.

They rolled a three so you have to beat an 18 to go undetected. And I add 10 plus a stealth which is two that is going to be an 18 exactly. They catch him. Oh! Jaja, no! You guys see Jaja go out, don't worry, Dan, I'm gonna do a good job. And then you see these three dragons all coming together.

And look at this little punk out here by himself. Fah, what are you doing little dragon turtles so far out of the water? Who, leave me alone, come on now. They're like 80s bullies. Hey, where's your water? A hunt dragon turtle. You see, they push it with his claws.

The white dragon catches him and throws him to the blue dragon. I can't just stay on by without saying anything. Can I telepathically communicate with Jar-Jah? Yeah. I say puke on him. Puke on him in self-defense. Okay. You see, he goes and he casts his like steam breath thing.

Does like a little bit of damage to the red one. You see they all at the same time breathe their fire, lightning and cold breath on him and Jaja disappears in the air. Yeah, now let's find that weird wood thing that we saw in the air and they start flying into the clouds Hard one go ahead and give me actually you know what hard one. I'll say you can either do stealth or you can fly Deeper into the clouds and just have like a harder time navigating getting out

I'll do a stealth now go ahead and give me another stealth check with advantage with advantage a stealth. Go ahead and give me another stealth check with advantage. With advantage, that's an 18. Hard one. You guys are lying low in the clouds but trying to stay close enough so that you can still find your way out easily. And suddenly you see coming through the white mist, red claws gripping onto the deck of the SS Stormborn, and then green claws, and then blue claws, as three hulking dragons lean over the deck of the SS Stormborn. You see Nerman and the Dorbs and Balnor kind of start backing up as you guys are surrounded. And you see the red dragon, Crane's his neck, sticks his head in the boat and goes, well, well, well, more small folk.

Hey, welcome. Welcome to the SS Stormborn. You've landed on my ship. It's a pleasure to have you. Crick Health has taught me hospitality. So my ship is as su-ship as they say. You see, hard one, um, Boundor leans into you and he goes, more small folk, do you think, do you think they saw the others?

Uh, hard one, go ahead and give me an insight check with advantage. Boundorires helping you 23 Whoa With that insight check you know the dragons would have picked them off to Loan people riding on a dragon. Why would they go after the warship? So he's talking about other small folk Yeah, well first of all, not that small. Hi.

Right, just these little guys, right? You're huge. And you see all of the dragons laugh. Nerman, I'm going to need you to go over there and polish that cannon. Let's see. Nerman starts to lean forward and a dragon hisses at him. Okay, I'll play along. Who came through here? Who else have you guys killed?

Huh, who have we killed? Well, there were these small folks that came by and they had wings. They were flying around like they thought they were dragons and we just plucked them right out of the sky, roasted them up and had them for lunch. Yeah! You see, they all start nodding and laughing. Hard to go ahead and give me an insight check. I feel like, I think these guys have feasted on some birds. Oh shit, that's another 23. 23, they're lying.

Oh, what? Lying about having killed them. Oh, these seem like having killed them? Hmm, oh, these these seem like shit. Okay Okay, so I saw them but didn't best them. I know bluster when I heard it you guys let these fuckers get away, huh? You see they look Frazzled, um, they go what do you what do you mean bluster off? I'll show you bluster. Tell you what? I'm thinking about adding this whole ship to my horde. You see the red dragon hops down and starts walking around on your deck.

Ooh, needs to be redone a little bit though. Need to polish up these boards. It looks like shit. The boards are fine and the boards will never be part of your horde. So why don't you go soar out of here? I winked a boughn or still slamming. I still be slamming. Hard one. Give me an intimidation check with disadvantage. That was my best poem yet. Dividation check, eh? So that's a 15. If I've got to use my disadvantage. You see, they all look at each other and they go, this guy's a slam bow and kick his ass!

And they all descend. Hard one, go ahead and roll initiative. But, that's a 15. So you see with a Nat 20, Boundor charges forward. Get away from our ship, get your dirty paws off your giant lizards. We're the fucking hounds.

Charges forward is gonna go after, let's say the blue dragon. Oh my God, a crit on the first hit. What an insane day for Boundor. Boundor is a new sword. Boundor hits on all three. Maybe crit breaker instead of Miss Breaker. First attacks.

Nice. He's gonna crack Shacer right away. Crack Shacer instead of a breaker. Love that. Crit maker. Love that for him. Boundor hits five times for a total of 71 damage. Just goes up and slashes into this blue dragon.

And a hard one. You guys are not in a great spot because there's three of these dudes and your friends are pretty far away. But you can see by how quickly Bounder was able to injure this one. You see it like gets, you see Bounder like gets up under its scales, um, and it starts to like shriek and let it like lightning. Uh, you see that these are probably young dragons. Um, that is the green

dragons turn. The green dragon is going to breathe down onto the deck hard one go ahead and Give me a constitution saving throw gladly. That's a 27. Bound or passes as well What about Nerman? Nerman will do one right now. Keep it together a lot. Hard one. You and Bound are both take 21 damage

as Poison spray fills the deck of the SS Stormborn. And when the green mist clears, you see that the dwarven crew. Unconscious. Not necessarily dead. Yeah, hard one. You see your old friend, Nerman, just this happy guy who always Stuck by your side in the doorfinage. Always a quarter. Running towards you to help at the last moment. Just like singed with all this poison damage.

Now the red dragon is gonna go. Hard one, I'm gonna need you to go ahead and give me a deck saving throw. 19. Hard one you pass, Bound or Passes. You guys both take 27 damage and you see as this rain of fire comes down on the ship, you see that the other dwarves are not breathing. A hard one that is your turn.

Let's take these guys out of the sky, hard one. Damn right, we're the fucking hounds and fuck you Blue Dragon. So that is... Do and fuck you blue dragon So that is Yes, I fucking I crit on the most nice Yeah, oh right you're a crit non stop you have so many attacks and crit Well, even worried about all right, so that is a 32 to hit and and I crit both head you get three attacks what's your third attack? That one I rolled

the net one. Got it. That's 56 damage to that one. Jesus this one is so hurt. I'm going to action surge then and see if I can fuck it up even more. Yeah. Yeah. Oh wait I also get a bonus attack because I because you crit. Yes that's right right great weapon master. Cool, so I'll take four attacks now Does a 23 hit yes great. I hit all four times Jesus Christ That's 81 damage hard one finish the blue dragon I take it by its neck and I Suffocate him in my solo cup and I suffocate him in my solo cup. You stick his snout in a keg,

and you see like electric energy coming out of it and shocking it. You kill this blue dragon easily, and you're able to with the other couple attacks, swing into the red dragon, and you do a bunch of damage to it, you do 50 damage to it. The Blue Dragon was already kind of on Deaths Door.

You guys did a ton of damage in a very quick amount of time. And you instantly see, like the Blue Dragon's dead, Red Dragon's already a little hurt, turns to the green one. Let's get outta here. Yeah, get the fuck outta here. Not yet, you don't. And Balnor jumps on it and is going to try to stab into its scales.

This is on the first attack. This is on the second attack. It literally just rolled three-natt fives. It just after saying a cool line hits scale three times. This is harder than it looks, and it and feeling super confident. On the green dragons turn, it disengages and flies off into the clouds. On the red dragons turn, it flies off and disengages into the clouds.

Bevin Moonshine, you guys see a green dragon and a red dragon emerge, but no blue dragon and no SS Stormborn. Huh. I guess they hid really well. Hey, guess so. I guess that worked out, huh? Maybe they befriended that blue dragon.

That sounds like hard one. I guess via... via Rappourse Bores, I just... Yeah, we're fucked. We're fucked. Oh! All of our friends are dead. Nerman's gone.

Come here! Yeah, come here. Rappourse Bores. Nerman, bring the ship about. I step over Nerman's dead body and I bring the ship about. I step over Nerman's dead body, and I bring the ship about. It just absolutely roasted. All right, hard one.

As you come up out of the clouds and try to join them in the gold shrine, go ahead and give me another stealth check for the stormborne. And I'll say you can do it with advantage because you're like hanging low, you're going through the clouds. You can probably like set yourself up. So you're going on the side of the shrines that have like tall trees and stuff that people can't see through.

I'm feeling this ship right now. That's a dirty 20. Nice. Okay. 30 20. Bev and moonshine, you guys see a hard one lands the stormborne on the platform of the gold shrine. You see on the stormborne is a dead blue dragon.

Face beaten up by a hammer and stabbed a bunch of times by Valnor Sword, but then you also see Nerman is dead, and there's three other burned dwarves. What? They're dead, guys. We lost the Dan crew. Okay, I do not have revive. We could do a bunch of reincarnates though. If y'all doors want to come back, I don't know, cobalt and taboxi.

I rush over to them and I pull out the diamond studs from my ears and I grab a couple of the other diamonds. I clinch them in my hands and I think I finally have enough slots where I can do Revivenify four times four times. I have a fourth level slot and then three third level slots. Damn. Oh, yeah Wow, so okay great because if you did if you wanted to say one I do have gentle repose We can kind of keep them as a limp sack of future life And I was gonna say I barely even like this guy He was sort of a bit to me at the dwarf in it But if you got for I got a bad vibe from him to all be all right You know I'll see this brave little warrior as as drawn their sword and was like gonna try to defend the stormboard

Just like roasted alive just like always a little smug that was all yeah He like kind of had always a little something to complain about Nothing was ever okay. My hands are fully charged with holy energy and I'm just like so so no so just the three. Let's do it. These are my dwarven brothers. Yeah, there's you know what? Hard one it's time for a little higher and deeper union. I power up my hands and then I touch my hands to their chest and then I give them each a dwarven headbutt to bring them back to life. Nice. You do touch heads to all of the dwarves.

I'm going to say these guys are in consequential enough. We're not going to do a big role that. Can I lean in real quick to the one that Harwan said he doesn't like and just say I almost brought you back as it to Baxi. You see we're not gonna make them reroll dead saves because these are minor enough guys we don't need the drama of that these guys all pop back up with the power of Beverly's holy power and you see the one next to moonshine wakes up it goes oh like I went to the darkness and all I saw was you. Whoa, really? Yeah, you said you were gonna turn me into a cat?

Oh no, I'm just saying that, you know, one false move around hard one and I'll bring you back as a boxy next time. You want to tell me- Just try to be a little more positive, is all. What's your end of that? I haven't talked to hard one in like 15 years. Well, maybe that's the problem. Go say hey.

All right. Hey Skippy, I'm sorry. I'm running out. I love, awesome. Why don't you come through the cabin in a bit. I have a couple poems I've been working on. All right. And if you see, yeah, Nerman wakes up

and Nerman just looks up at you hard one and goes, Oh, where, where are they? Where are the dragons? Uh, sees the big dead dragon. Okay, one, we got one. We got one, Nerman. It's good to have you back, brother. Thanks. Thank you. Does anyone know about the burial practices of dragons? Oh, yeah, yeah, you just sort of do this. I kick it over the side. Oh, real quick, real quick, I want to send handy Andy

to slice a bit of dragon meat. Oh, for sure. You get a big chunk of dragon meat and then unceremoniously kick it over the side. Okay, if you think that's how they tend to do it, then I trust your knowledge of dragon ways, hard one. Thank you, moonshine. And I've got some more knowledge I got to drop on you guys quickly.

Drop away. So I think we are not the first people to pay these dragons a visit. Wait, is this not a poem? It can be if anybody wants to give me a beat and 10 minutes to write. No, I actually think that the information will be a lot clearer. 10 minutes to write. 10 minutes to write. Oh, so it's like inspiring speech.

I see. Okay, I'm inspiring poem. Look, I think a bunch of chosen birds were, came through here. Oh, so it is a bit. So we were right. The all is going to be after this. The all is trying to triple her game. Yeah, and I don't know how far they got, but I know that they successfully evaded these same dragons. All right, in that case, then I would like to cast a locate creature on a chosen bird. Are there any chosen birds that you know in particular? Barrett Briston?

Hector. Hector, definitely hector. I would like the low-key creature on Barrett Briston. Moonshine? Yeah. Barrett Briston is in that gold trine. Thank God you didn't do Hector. Oh, wait, cannot also look at Chris Schoenhector.

Yeah, we're Hector. Hector, Hector's in there too, Mojang. Oh, I think we need to stay out here and beat each other up and level up before we're going to face off with Hector. What about Jules and Jim? I think we got to get in there. Yeah, let's do it. Sweet. Yeah, you guys see Nerman and the other dwarves get to... Wait, I haven't said this in a while. Something misaligned at the shrine.

Have you said one of the things you say? I used to say that a lot. I hadn't thought about it in a while, but then with hard ones beat poetry coming about. I thought, hey, I used to say that a lot. I hadn't thought about it in a while, but then with hard ones beat poetry coming about, I thought, hey, I used to make a lot of rhymes too. This is just the occasion to remember. The dwarfs tell you that they'll watch the ship and they take to cleaning up as you guys head off to the shrine. So you guys pass through the mouth of the gold dragon. The gold golem is not making any effort to try to stop you. You travel down a short hallway with wall tiles, like gold dragon scales until it opens up to a huge circular room with a tall domed ceiling.

In the center of the room, you see six pedestals, all with gold dragon statues atop them. The dragons are all in fearsome poses with their mouths open. And all around the room, you see a mural painted that shows a lagerin doing battle, giants fighting dragons at whatnot. It's gorgeous.

It's like this sistine chapel kind of vibe. Let's take a nice deep look at that mural. Let's take in the art. Yeah, I need to see if that's egg tempura or acrylic on there. Yeah. This is how books are supposed to be. They make graphics rolls. You've seen me read them.

Hmm. So you guys, you guys just by looking at this mural are going to be able to see a lot. But go ahead and give me investigate checks and I'll say you can do it with advantage. 23 just the 14 for me. Just a 16 for me. But 17 for me. Okay sweet. So you guys look around at the mural and you see that it follows a narrative. On the left you see a goblin, this giant goblin monster doing battle with three alladren, one of whom you recognize as the mortal form of Melora. She's very tall with green eyes, a glowing green longbow.

She's joined by a male alladren and another woman, another alladren with gold hair, yellow eyes, and a darker complexion. You see that as the painting goes on, these three Eladrin kill the goblin king, then stand around the glowing yellow rock. It's divine heart. The painting goes on to follow the one Eladrin with the gold hair and yellow eyes. You see her riding a gold dragon and fighting alongside other dragons in a fight against giants. Then finally, on the right side of the room, you see the gold dragon alone on top of a horde.

And then, hard one with a roll above a 23. As you guys are all looking around, you look up and you see in the domed ceiling, there's a painting of all three eladrin. It looks like the part of the mural where they're all standing around the glow and yellow rock, but each of them has a piece of it. Hmm, well look at that. Huh, so it looks like Malora perhaps divvied up this divine heart. Munchan, do you know who these other alladrin that are portrayed here? Do you know who they are?

Do I know who they are? Munchan, go ahead and give me a history check. Hmm, hmm, hmm. Can I help on that? Let's do. I got a nine. You guys aren't sure. This seems to be this is somewhat of a secret. You have not heard of this. Well, I suppose we need to crack out of get in there because Bristin, Bristin, Bristin is in there. So is Hector. So is he. I didn't even want to speak his name, less than echo's awake his

eye or. So you guys also see these six pedestals with gold dragon statues on them and it looks like each one has a button in its mouth that you can press. Can I do like detect? No. I mean, they're all, detect magic is just going to be nothing here. I mean, I could do it. Okay, I'll do detect magic. I think I got enough. I'll do it on the first one.

Okay. Moonshine. Actually, I want to do it on the last one all the way to the right. Okay. Moonshine. Mo moonshine. Actually, I want to do it on the last one all the way to the right. Okay, moonshine. What's this to where the dragon is sitting on the horn? Great. moonshine, you detect magic. Um, there is a losery magic on this dragon.

And you quickly think this might not actually be gold. Ah, so this ain't gold. So we got to figure out which one is actually gold. Ah, so this ain't gold, so we got to figure out which one is actually gold. If that's the case, can I just bite the next one to see if I think it's gold? Wow. I don't want to burn on my spells last. Yeah, she'd be able to like bend it. There'd like be a little bit of give. Yeah, that's what you see when when people are testing something's real bold or not They might shine go ahead and give me a perception check It's gonna be a 23 Moose I'm damn right. You do not press any of the buttons you go around and you bite

each individual Gold dragon god, it's a pleasure watching her and it doesn't It's not like soft to the bite, but the fourth one like one of the ones in the middle tastes metallic Y'all we got a winner Everyone come grab a bite grab a bite. Yeah, they bite it out my filling. You guys bite it. You guys instantly chip your teeth. Okay, and then should we press it

using the telekinesis of the hat just in case it snaps down? We don't want anyone to lose an arm. Sweet. Yeah, absolutely go for it. So I press it with the telekinesis. Sweet, Mochine, you press it with the telekinesis. At that moment, you guys see the dragon's mouth that was opened behind you.

This doorway closes. You see gas starts coming out of the gold dragon statue. Everybody go ahead and give me con-saving throws. Okay. Oh, congratulations, gas. 23. 17. 21. Okay. Oh, congratulations, gas. 23. 17. 21. Okay. Bev and hard one. You guys see moonshine and Balnor drop. What is it though? What is it? Is it boy sleep? I'm immune to sleep. Completely immune to it. I am immune to sleep. A immune to sleep advantage against being charmed.

Jesus Christ. I literally wrote that today and I was like, huh, funny that it's never come up ever. You guys see this sleep gas starts to fill the room. Ballnor drops back like a rock and starts snoring. Oh, he's looking for a chair. You guys see after a moment, the mural on the back wall opens up and

Reveals a secret door and out walks a Gold cobalt co gold Who as he sees you guys Still awake kind of gives a start and goes oh ah, ah, oh, I could see not everything worked as it was intended to. Yeah, I don't sleep at train. A friend had a little too much of the congratulations gas. Yeah, I think he was going to fall asleep anyway.

It really wasn't even your spill. You see, he looks a little uncomfortable, but smiles and nods. You the cleanup crew? Me? No, my name is Cordone. I am just a butler here. I work for the glittering lady. Welcome to the shrine of the dragon god.

And that's where my last session is. Love the lady dragon. Yeah! Glittering lady. Sweet Yeah. A little littering, lady. Sweet guys, thank you so much for listening. We hope this episode came out good. I think our first foray into remote recording an episode went well. I felt like I was able to connect with you.

I enjoyed it and it was good to be back. It was great to be back, but not getting to see Murphy and Emily's cats has been devastating. So please be with me and send me your thoughts and prayers in the trying time. I missed the cats, but I'll tell you what, this last couple hours has been an escape from my own private hell and I have to shoot it.

So thank you. Might as well, right there with you. A very necessary ball. Yeah. Thank you guys so much for listening. You can check out our Patreon for the Aftershow, patreon.com slash nad pod. Thank you guys all so much for listening.

Please stay safe. Anybody have anything else to plug? I'll plug washing your goddamn hands and staying the fucking hands. And stay in the hole. Keep your hands to yourself, make love to your couch. Oh, you can watch big city greens

if you're looking for something to watch. If your whole family is home stuck inside, it's a great little show. You can find it on Disney Plus first season there, and then the second season, I believe, is airing on Amazon and iTunes, and on the Disney Channel. So check it out.

Sweet. Amazing. It's great. It's a world where nothing's wrong. Wow. We need more of those. Sweet. Thank you so much for listening.

We'll be back next week with another episode. In the meantime, follow us on Twitter at CHMurfusMee at called these call-doll, adiacsford assembly and adjker which is Jake and you can tweet about the show using hashtag nADPOD that's NADPOD. It's the end of the show, everybody, and that means we need to shout out our benevolent Council of Elders. Starting with Brad D, Dylan B, Danny P, Steel Breaker, and Samuel B, a crew of colorless dragons since they're practically invisible, nobody has ever seen one, but legend has it that deep in their caverns lies a massive horde of room temperature dissonny water bottles.

Oh, beard man damn, Adam R. Danielle the dastardly dame, aloo card and Alexander T. Blue Dragonborn guards whose boss was killed by hard one. Luckily, they instantly found employment in Gladehome using their breath weapons to power Toneth and Tinkels' new Dune Buggy. Not only is it eco-friendly, it's also cute as hell. Howdor Frostback, Jordan DJ, Jeffreas, CutterW and Andrew M, The Giths or I in the mental network who are responsible for remembering all the celebrities that have appeared in Cameo roles on Law and Order SVU, The Mind Flare's crave their knowledge above all else. Shubert the mushroom, Alainacy, Mixologist Michael McD, Boundora's Boy, and Michael C, Celestial

Beings who have regular hearts, but divine livers. No one knows how they came to possess such holy organs, including the gods themselves, because they were black out as fuck when it happened. Justin I, Jacob C, Elena M, Dana G, and Paul G, Salis' personal chefs, she used to have more, but they were fired after one had the audacity to say, maybe you should eat something other than eggs. Damn ill, our, Destincy, Jive G, David T, and Aaron Sully. The band of boobs hallmates in their new dorm room who are currently meeting with the R8 to lodge a formal complaint about the amount of tuna Balnor has been heating up in the communal microwave.

If you've got a problem, you can go to a different floor. Sergio Salazar Salaman Sakuraiya Stasequani, Michael L. Trayle the Kray Faye, Jorias and Pupthoth Josh the Kobalds cousins who all live in the Dragon Realm. They're all super jacked, but also super flexible from doing a ton of yoga. The boobs don't stand a chance. Now that's the quarantine goal. Do my yoga. Adam H. Ryan, Aaron G. Jake Owl and Michael M. The other monochromatic dragons. They are actually black and white and they only speak French with English subtitles. They smoke cigarettes and they love truffo.

They're kind of inseparable but they make you feel smarter whenever you're around them. Big Buck, Richard X. Mock Sam L, Troy McCee, and Drew Nasty, a collection of water droplets that form another cloud that Moonshine could have also dispelled. But instead of hiding Dragon Topia, it just had Jimmy Tagliata's porn collection that his mom doesn't know about. Which was actually also called Dragon Topia, I believe. I don't know what any of this is. actually also called drag and topy I believe don't know what any of this is. Josh as Nicholas C Austin C.

Kristen P and Axel a the audience at hard ones first slam poetry show they all sat politely through the whole thing and no one asked for their money back. So they are and always will be the real heroes of this story. Mike H Matthew E Angel gamer and Catherine S The PR team at Budweiser that's been trying to snap a pick of Bound or Critten with a Bud Heavy in hand to keep at it folks you'll get your pick. TJ M. the Nome Barbarian, Trest the Traveler, Robert F. Paul and Megan the twins and Hunter are Nerman's five parents. That's right. Nerman was raised by a collective family, a radical and inspiring reimagining of the definition of family. But we actually

never got into it because the boobs didn't ask this minor character their backstory. Zolo Dolo, Nick B, Burley T, Panama James, I am the atlas, a troop of bards that travels under the name Clouded Judgment and encourages teenagers to be wary of entering strange cloud portals unattended. And of course we got Coton B, J, C, C, Lulu, Aiden, R, H, and Robert P, Hector's classmates at the Chosen Academy who always knew Hector was destined for greatness. Unbelievable. Timmy R. Blitzbrig Dmitry, J. Dragonborn, Zach C. and Digital Burn 101, the greatest

hand washers in all of Bohemia. They are green teens who have earned every cleanliness badge, including the coveted washing the back of your thumbs badge. Oh, keep the bag of your thumbs, clean my friends. Lucas B, Jordan L, Talith X, Mateo C, and Kazamir, the all-knowing. Maverso's sorcerer friends who own a time share in Dragonopolis. Maverso's super piss that he has to be at school won't be around for beer pong nights on the Dragon Balcony. Kaley Elise, Barnesinator, Christian A, Jens Christian T, and Luke H. A crew of Dragon

Born Guards who are totally going to get fired for missing an entire ship floating around in an empty sky. Come on guys, look alive. That's bad. Devon W. Shana would be Jared E. Persephone and Eric Mick D, a family of blue dragons who are growing increasingly concerned that their shithead teen dragon son hasn't gone home for dinner yet. Hopefully he'll show up soon. Unlikely, Reese NS, Eric and Andrea B, Jay Parker, Jonathan O, and Austin MR, the other

Aladren and Malores party who were left out of the mural at the gold shrine because there wasn't enough room. They planned to sue the glittering lady for pushing historic inaccuracies. Sounds like some winter Eladron in my heart. Okay, Steven C. Maxwell C. Mike K. Omri M. and Callum L. Bohumian talent scouts who are super impressed by hard one throwing moonshine like a vortex football and are looking into hiring hard one as a spokesperson and moonshine as a vortex football. Scott D, North are the prodigy ranger, Mikongi, Dan and the red rain, the gith party goers

who got way too trashed and forgot about the divine heart on the material plane. Come on guys, grow up. Richard C. Karen T. Curtis S. Nathaniel P. and Nikki W. Hard one's dwarven crew of the SS Stormborn. Thankfully, these guys were below deck polishing cannonballs during the dragon fight. Also, thankfully, they didn't find hard one stash of painted born near the cannon. Andrew B. Christopher B. Nicholas P. Kevin M. Raul and Esme M. 12-year-old dragons, essentially just as powerful as a teenage dragon, but a little less and sufferable. We love you, youngins.

Never turned 13. Meribal the Kitty Morphing Nome. Joe McGee. Meta Amps. Atticus C. Amy W. And. Kelvin. G. Meta Amps, Atticus C. Amy W. and Kelvin Nudles, the folks who threw the astral rager that

gave all the gift a tiny little blur in their collective memory. But damn, if they could only remember, because it was the best night of ever all's lives. Grace G. Eric G. Michelle O. Gage M. Number one, Beverlin fan Gen R, and Tingle the Bard. A bunch of folks trying to get engaged in Glade Home were a pretty pissed because the diamond store was completely out of diamonds. Who would buy so many diamonds? Why would anybody do that? I don't know, probably a righteous cause. Lance, Fel Dennis, gone off. I'm hopeless, Dave H and Michael K.M.

Horse breeders who are kind of beginning to regret selling their prize mayors to four race. The rates said they weren't up to anything to various, but they shouldn't have taken any chances. Redneck Ruff, Christianess, Jack L, Nick A, and Y Greck32 chose an angel who fled from Hector's Wrath. They could follow the Ala, They could obey Barrett brisden But when they saw the hate in Hector's heart they decided they had to go a wall congrats heroes

Thank you guys so much for listening. Yes, y'all stay safe out there. We love you Yes, we love you stay safe We'll be back next week with another episode in the meantime You can check out the after show on her patreon patreon.com slash nad pot if you'd like to do that. Thank you to all of our Patreon subscribers and all of our listeners. Stay safe out there y'all. Goodbye, sweeties.

That was a hit gun podcast.