Oh What A Time... - #58 Bad Ideas (Part 2)

Episode Date: July 22, 2024

This is Part 2! For Part 1, check the feed from yesterday! On the show this week we’re discussing some of the most absolutely disastrous ideas that history has to offer; we’ve got airships, the i...nfamous Sinclair C5 and various attempts at creating ’smell-o-vision’ (which sometimes involved a ‘smell-brain’). Plus, we’re still struggling to get over the concept of trifle, especially with the possible inclusion of veal. If you’ve got any more of trifle, savoury trifle or anything on the worst excesses of Victorian cuisine, you know what to do: hello@ohwhatatime.com If you're impatient and want both parts in one lovely go next time plus a whole lot more(!), why not treat yourself and become an Oh What A Time: FULL TIMER? In exchange for your £4.99 per month to support the show, you'll get: - two bonus episodes every month! - ad-free listening - episodes a week ahead of everyone else - And first dibs on any live show tickets Subscriptions are available via AnotherSlice, Apple and Spotify. For all the links head to: ohwhatatime.com You can also follow us on:  X (formerly Twitter) at @ohwhatatimepod And Instagram at @ohwhatatimepod Aaannnd if you like it, why not drop us a review in your podcast app of choice? Thank you to Dan Evans for the artwork (idrawforfood.co.uk). Chris, Elis and Tom x Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 What's 2FA security on Crackin? Let's say I'm captaining my soccer team, and we're up by a goal against, I don't know, the Burlington Bulldogs. Do we relax? No way. Time to create an extra line of defense and protect that lead. That's like 2FA on Cracken.A. on Cracken. A way to keep what you already have, safe and sound. Go to Crackin.com. Cr-a-a-in. Cranc-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in-in to-a-a-a-s-a-s-s-s-s-s-s-s. to-a-s. to-a-a-a-s. the-a-a-s. the-s. the-s. the-a-s. the-s. the bullkkoxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx. the-s. the-bo-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a Kraken.com slash legal slash CA-P-RU-Dashback-Dash-Dash-Dash-Dasclam. Disclaimer for info on Kraken's undertaking to register in Canada. I'm going back to University for $0.9 a month. Up to 5% too, everyone wants to be a student. Join for just $4.99 a month. Savings may three, eligibility, and member terms apply. Looking for a collaborator for your career, a strong ally to support your next level's success? You will find it at York University School of Continuing Studies,
Starting point is 00:00:55 where we offer career programs purpose built for you. Visit continue. York You. I'm Dave, and saving with TD insurance made me feel like I scored my own jingle. With over 30 ways to save, nobody seems like this. Save on home and auto like only you can at TD Insurance.com slash ways to save. T.D. Ready for you. This is part two of bad ideas. Let's go on with the show. Now every so often when you see a really tiny car, and I get this when you see a really tiny car, and I get this when I see the Ford car to an extent but mainly the Nissan smart car, a little
Starting point is 00:01:46 miniature car, you think yourself that has to be impractical doesn't it? Yeah. Like I'm not saying that everyone needs to be driving around in an SUV or a minibus, but some of those cars are just source money think, you know where the kids sit, how do you get your shopping in there, etc. You know, I used to have a smart car. I had a convertible smart car for about five years. Was it a complete pain in the ass? It was great for parking. It was super inconvenient because you've only got two seats. Oh, you couldn't really pick anyone up.
Starting point is 00:02:14 And once I remember driving with the top down along like a high street. And I heard a kid say to his mom like, mommy, mommy, his mom like, Mommy, mommy, look, a toy car, which was... Terrible, terrible to hear. Did it feel like you were going super fast? You couldn't really go that fast. You could go, I mean, you could easily get to 70, but it was. No, but like my, my, my, my, my, my, the first car, they were in a smaller car and you could go to the mid-70s. I know what you mean. You're saying when you're in a smaller car and you can find it to the ground. Yeah, it was being low to the ground.
Starting point is 00:02:46 They said they felt, you know, they felt like they were going really fast even when they were doing some 30 miles an hour. Now 30 years ago, the launch of Smart Autom include the Hankel Cabin bubble car, the Renault Voicuret, the BMW Zeta. The BMW Zeta, that's quite common, you see that a lot in the 70s. So 30 years ago you had the launch of the sort of smart car in Switzerland, that seemed to provide a meaningful answer, but there have been micro cars around for decades. So the classic ones are things like the Renault Voctre, the 3-We-W, thau, thl-W, thl-W, thl-W, thl-C, th-C, th-C, th-C, th-C, th-C, th-C, th-C, th-C, th-C, th-C, th-C, th-C, th-C, th-S, th-Ca, thi, thi, thi, th, th, thi, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th-C, th-C, th-C, th-a, thi, thi, and, and-a, and-a, and-a-a-a-a-newa-newa-n, and, thi-a, thi-a, thi-a, thi-a, th BMW Ozzetta, the three-wheeled Pee-P50. If you Googleese, the Heinkel Cabin bubble car as well, you will recognize them. Of course there was a
Starting point is 00:03:32 micro machine as well as we were really real small. The Bond mini car launched from his Preston Factory in 1949. These three-mi-century ones, often three-wheeled micros. They they could be driven, at least in the UK, using a motorcycle license, so they were cheaper, they were more economical to run. Yeah, so you're paying less tax on them as well. Oh, fascinating. Cheaper production costs, cheaper to buy, cheaper maintenance costs because they only had one wheeled. So by the 60s or the microcar, a decline. So by they they they they they they they they they they they they they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were cheaper. So, they were they were they were cheaper, they were they were cheaper, so they were they were they were they were they were they were they were, so, so, so, so, they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were cheaper, they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were they were their their their their their the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the the cheaper. So. So, they were cheaper. So, the 60s or the microcar decline... The one-wheel car is something I want to see. The Unicycle. The Unicar. So by the 1960s, though the microcar declined in favor of larger, but still relatively
Starting point is 00:04:13 small models such as the Fiat 500 and the Mini and the Renno 2CV, there were three wheeled vehicles that remain. The reliant robbin, obviously, it is probably the most famous one in the UK largely because it's the car del boy and Rodney driver only fuzz and horses and they are such stupid cars when you see them yeah and then there was the Bond bug which was another reliant model and but basically they became objects of amusement even though they were popular people just took the piss out of them now enter Sir Clive Sinclair the inventor the entrepreneur who began work the the the the the the the the th on the the th the th the th th the th th the th th th the th th the th the th. the the the the the th. th. the th. the the th. th. the the the the. tho. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. the the the the the the the the the just took the piss out of them. Now, enter Sir Clive Sinclair, the inventor, the entrepreneur, who began work on an electric microvehicle that would solve traffic problems, but be environmentally friendly and provide
Starting point is 00:04:54 effective individual transportation. Now, Sinclair's name had been made in home computing and he tried to branch out into futuristic products like the black watch, which was a digital wrist watch that basically preempted like the Apple watch and the Samsung. Really? Yeah, he was way ahead of his time and handheld television. Now, Sinclair Vehicles will launch in 1993 with Barry Wills of the Delorian Motor Company as a managing director. The C5, which is the only model that went
Starting point is 00:05:25 into production, was essentially an electric tricycicle encased in a plastic shell. Hence, Sinclair's absolute insistence that it was a vehicle or not a car. And it was dreamt up the University of Warwick's Science Park and it cost 12 million pounds to develop. Now, have you seen a Sinclair C5? I have. Yes. Twelve million pounds. They're the kind of cars that, programs at the end of the 90s, when they would talk about how daft the 80s had been.
Starting point is 00:05:54 The Sinclair C5 was always one of the first things that they would reference and show. It's probably worth describing what it looks looks thoes thoes thoes thoes th looks looks looks looks looks tho. describing what it looks like Ellis maybe for people who haven't seen it. I'd describe it as a sit-down bike. A gray sit-down bike that's really small. There were made in Wales, made in Murtha, which makes me like them more. There was no roof. But with a casement of a car basically, yeah, yeah. But there was no roof so if it was raining, you just got really wet. Not to state that it's not a you just got really wet.
Starting point is 00:06:25 Not to sustain, it's not a viable vehicle option in Britain. No, no, no. Maybe a week, a year. So there's no roof. You cannot be driving, holding an umbrella. The wind would be a complete pain in the ass as well. Hale. Imagine being hailed on an encyclical. We've got no roof. There was lots of potential, but the C5 was besettiputeded thiiiiiiiiiiiiiii- thi- thi- thi- thi- thi- thi- th, it's th, it's th, it's a th, it's a th, it's a that it's a that it's a that it's a that's a that's a that's a that it's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's a that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th. th. th, it, it's a th, it's a th, it's not th, it's not thi-fi-fi-fifui-fifui. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi Imagine being hailed on an Innocent-C5. We've got no roof.
Starting point is 00:06:46 There was lots of potential, but the C5 was beset by limitation. The battery life was poor, there was no roof. Top speed was 15 miles an hour, which is very, very slow. The initial purchase cost was $399 quid and a new battery, $349. How much they've 399 pounds. Oh wow. The battery was 3495. The bespoke charger was 2495. So in all about 460 quid or 1380 pounds in today's terms. And that didn't include the optional extras, indicators as an optional extra. Love that. Mirrors as an optional extra. Love that. Mud flaps. an optional extra. Love that. Mud flaps, a horn, a high-vis mast
Starting point is 00:07:27 designed to improve visibility on the road. It's a sort of extroverts car. You really do want attention if you're going to drive a Sinclair C5. I'd say, but I'd argue you can just stick, if you've got no roof, can't you just stick your arm out when you're a bike. Also, the mudguards, you're not going off-road on that, are you? There's quite a few things you can, you don't need to invest in, you don't get mudguards.
Starting point is 00:07:53 Yeah, I'd quite like a horn. Yeah, horns good. Or once again, you could just yell. Yeah, the things aren't needed, that's why they're optional. Now on his launch at Alexander Palace on 10th January in 1985, the firm's marketing insisted that soon the Sinclair C5 could be as familiar on Britain's roads as electrical appliances are in the home. But most commentators, you know, they sniggered, members of the public, able to view models in
Starting point is 00:08:22 electricity board showrooms around the country just so it is an object of amusement. Now the C5 as I said was made at the Hoover factory in Pentrabachre and Mithertsidville, alongside that unit's more traditional, fair, washing machines, vacuum cleaners, etc. Hoover had been encouraged by the Welsh Development Agency by exaggerated production expectations of up to half a million units. Wow! Amazing. They thought it was going to rescue the economy of methane us during the minor strike. We're going to be making half a million of these things. Yeah. Now a week after launch the workers that factory
Starting point is 00:08:56 announced a strike to protest against stagnant wages. By early February 1985, some car dealers offering a free Sinclair C5 with every purchase. Q the strap line, Lancier and Sinclair can transport you into the 1990s. At one point, Sinclair was forced to bribe teenagers 20 pounds a day to drive around London and C5s to drive up sales. And there were similar efforts in Manchester and Leeds. Yeah, within a month of launch, they'd had orders for 5,000 units but the sales were dire within a few months production being slashed as much as 90% by August 85 and production ceased those 5,000 were the only ones of the 14,000 units
Starting point is 00:09:36 manufactured ever sold. Hoover demanded 1.5 million pounded unne. So what went wrong it had terrible press. So on Valentine's Day in 1985 a London student was arrested and charged with being drunk in charge of a vehicle a C5 after volunteering to drive his girlfriend's model home. A few days later was reported that Granny hurting C5 spill when an 85 year to their curb whilst riding in her C5 and she spilled out and broke her elbow. So from the day of the launch onwards, the C5 was constantly referred to as controversial. Counselors sitting on road safety committees would take opportunity to denounce the
Starting point is 00:10:12 C5 is unsafe and unfit for traveling on Her Majesty's highways. William Woolard presented to top gear at the time and later tomorrow's world. He was scathing in his review. This, despite the then-transport minister Linda Chalker, telling the press that the C5 appears of a number of safety advantages over the conventional bicycle. Right. Counselors in Henley took this one stage further debating whether to have dedicated C5 line installed on the town's road network. Can you imagine that? That's part of the problem, isn't it a car? Is it a bike a bike a bike a bike a bike a bike a You're on the, you're going to be on the roads next to cars and those lorries flying past you in
Starting point is 00:10:49 your tiny Sinclair C5. And you're lower down than a bike. Yeah. I remember the footage I saw, I've seen loads of footage of the C5 because it was such a fuss around it when it was released. I've th of him of Sinclair like negotiating roundabouts, like really busy roundabouts, and it just looks terrifying. What did they spend that 12 million quid on? Because surely you figure that out day one when you go out onto a road. Yeah. Now, and I'm a cyclist, but I wouldn't want to, I wouldn't want to drive Sinclair C5. No. It just looks, just doesn't look right. For years afterwards, the most visible electric cars and Britain's roads were milk floats. And that's the thing, when I was a kid,
Starting point is 00:11:32 I mean, this sounds, God, makes me sound old. All milk was delivered when I was a kid. Very, you only bought milk in a shop if you'd messed up. And it was electric milk floats. Yeah, we still have milk milk milk milk flut. Yeah. We still have milk delivered, actually. We do. Do you? Steve, Steve R.Milkman is the local celebrity. He will switch on the Christmas lights in Bonstad where I live.
Starting point is 00:11:51 He's a big deal, Steve. He hasn't got a milk float. Yeah, he's got a milk float. Has he? And I actually saw the milk float this morning. flags. Oh what a shame. Do you want to hear something quite depressing? I just said he's really milking it and neither of you acknowledge it at all just kept talking and you were quite right but it's quite a lonely place to say. Just more harmless fun. It's more harmless fun.
Starting point is 00:12:16 We return to that machine and to that green line that you're wired up to. There's no bodily response to that. Britain's, Britain's was harmless comedian. Do you do what you'd be great at? Cracker jokes. Yes, thank you very much. It is fun for all the family. Yeah, thank you very much. So yeah, so electric vehicles now obviously there's about 1.2 million electric vehicles in the UK. It used to just be the milk float but now they're very common but unfortunately the Sinclair C5 never caught on. Amazing. Very briefly you mentioned they ceased production in August which means those 5,000 sales were during the summer months the only time that you could drive the C5. So they were hitting their perfect window. Yeah, that was their chance. Remarkable. Turn off hesitation.
Starting point is 00:13:06 Turn off doubt. Turn off fears. The YMCA of Greater Toronto helps you turn off whatever's holding you back. So you can let your potential shine. Turn on confidence. Turn on connections. Turn on possibilities. There are hundreds of programs and services available at the Y.
Starting point is 00:13:30 See what you can achieve at YMCAGTA.org This will be the day. Breaking news coming in from Bet 365, where every nail biting overtime win, breakaway, pick six, three-point shot, underdog win, buzzer beater, shootout, walk off, and absolutely every play in between is amazing. From football to basketball and hockey to baseball, whatever the moment, it's never ordinary at Bet 365.
Starting point is 00:14:00 Must be 19 or older, Ontario only. Please play responsibly. If you or someone you know has concerns about gambling, visit Connects Ontario.C. At Pennzoil, we have one job. Pioneering motor oil so advanced, you don't have to think about your motor oil. Instead, you can think about how your engine sounds, how your stomach feels as the RPM's build, how your wheels hug the curves. And how, with the Penzoil platinum up to 15-year, 800,000 kilometer protection guarantee, your adventures will be many. Penzoil. Long may we drive, available at your local Canadian tire.
Starting point is 00:14:33 Enrollment required, keep your receipts. Other conditions apply. See Penzoil.C.A. for full details. So today I'm going to talk to you about a very weird invention called Smellervision. Now do you guys remember what Smelavision was? Do you remember this? Vividly. I think was it to do with children in need? It was? Was it around 1991? I remember, I was in primary school and was it around 1991. I remember, I was in primary school and I remember this, I did smell a vision.
Starting point is 00:15:11 I was there. I remember and I did it as well. What about you? Do you remember it? Yes, I did. I think the stickers for Smellervision came with a kid's magazine, something like fast forward or something. So I remember getting my Smellervision stickers or Smellivision piece of paper and scratching wealth. You will both agree it was it was quite a
Starting point is 00:15:31 weird idea. Now for those of you who aren't familiar with Smellivision, I'll tell you about it now. In November 1995, so a bit later than you thought Chris, children in need here in the UK launched a new innovation of interactive television called Smellivision with the tagline, TV has never smelled so good. He's never smelled before, but I quite like that. For one pound, you could buy a 24-page booklet from your news agent and that booklet was full of numbers from 1 to 40. When prompted on television during Children in Need or a couple of other programs like Noll's House Party or Blue Peter, viewers would have to scratch off the corresponding number and sniff that
Starting point is 00:16:15 part of the page underneath. And then that smell would reflect what was happening on the screen at the time. My memory of it is that no matter what you scratched off it all smelt the same. A hundred percent I'm so glad I was just primed. What's exciting about this conversation is I remember thinking this at the time but this is pre-internet so you couldn't go on and go if other people having the same experience that I'm having. Yeah yeah yeah they all smell the same. They tht they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they all they they all they all they all they all they all they they they they they the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their all their all their all their their their their all all all all their their their the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the same. Yeah. This is incredible. I've sat on that for years. And not particularly strongly. Yeah. Yes. Well, here's a quote from the newspapers at the time from someone who do smell a vision. It says, was smell a joke or what? We sat there religiously scratching away our whiff packages as Noel Edmonds took us around the house at Crinkley Bottom of the
Starting point is 00:16:58 six smells, one was vaguely lemon of the s stale socks. Yeah, yeah, yeah. One was vaguely lemon. And you're like, oh, is that what Crickley Bottom smells like? Is that one knows how sparty smells like? Just all a little bit the same and a bit fusty? So the people of Britain were sat there scratching off their little card and smelling vaguely lemon-y smells or old socks. Or possibly they were watching Vic Reeves and Bob Morton do a show called A Know Through Nature, which was supposed to
Starting point is 00:17:28 give the unique whiffs of wild animals. I'm not sure I did reading the descriptions of how good these cards actually were. I was thinking about this, before we sort of get into the history of this, what sort of TV show do you think would be improved by a quality smell of vision? Oh, a cooking program. Cookery show. It has to be cookery, doesn't it? Yeah, that's the one, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:17:51 Anything else? Country file? No. I have a room in a rural area I would say no. I mean, if it worked, and if it was genuinely accurate, a cookery program would be incredible with Smartvision. Yeah, especially if it was one of those ones and it was like a tour of Italy or France or someone like that. In Tuscany, yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:17 And Rick Stein's walking through a market picking up the fresh vegetables. Oh, yeah. I'm sold on this. And David Beckham is saying this is my favourite spice market in the world, like they said in the lead up to the Qatar World Cup. I think though, a bit like the SIGLA-SY5, when everyone realized that Smellivision all smell of the same in 1995, I don't think anyone is still working on the technology. Yes. I think it's one of those ideas got binned bin bin bin bin bin binned been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been been the the the the the the the same the same the same the technology? Yes. I think it's one of those ideas that got bined, is it? You will find out on that.
Starting point is 00:18:47 Chris, very briefly, you're really into wrestling. What about that? Would it improve wrestling? So, sweat, blood, baby oil. What are you thinking? You're scratching that off? Yeah, probably not. Well, at the time, it was very successful for children in need. Six million booklets were produced. More than a million pounds from that alone was raised for the charity.
Starting point is 00:19:11 However, the question is that we'll be answering today, did the BBC really invent Smelovision? Far from it. It's a question we've all wanted to know. Did the BBC invent Smelovision? At last, the nation could find out. Because of the unique way the BBC is funded. I love that this has turned into an investigative podcast and finally tackling the big issues. Exactly. It's like an audio panorama. The concept actually first appeared in the world's press in 1958, so a long time ago, as a brainchild of Mike Todd Jr.
Starting point is 00:19:45 He was an American film producer, but this was not in a scratch card form. So the London Daily News wrote, The swarthy pipe smoking Mr. Todd hopes to see 30 cinemas installed with his smell of vision equipment. Now, the use of this process in cinemas had actually been created by Hans A. Laube, who was a Swiss osmologist 20 years earlier than that even in 1939 who unveiled his prototype at the World's Fair in New York in 1939. So to explain what... 1939? Well, it's a slightly different idea. So, explain what this cinema idea of Smellivision was as invented by Hans A. Laub. So how it basic work was,
Starting point is 00:20:25 involve the time release of odors into a cinema as you were watching a film via a machine which was called, this is such a rubbish name, the smell brain. What sort of thing an eight-year-old would come up with? Not a good enough name for something you're pumping a lot of money into. The smell of brain. Are there cinemas when it rains in the film, you get water splashed on you, etc. Yes. I have, have I made that up? Or is that true?
Starting point is 00:20:58 There is a thing at Legaland, is a ride at Legaland called Flight of the Lion, which is a full, it's you sit on these seats which vibrate and tip, and they do spray mists and water in the bits of smell as you're, and it feels like you're flying over things. It is like one of the most amazing things I've ever experienced, genuinely, even though it's designed for children, it's just, it's mind blowing and it really. It's thblowing and it really does trick the mind. However, it's not something really which has kind of been rolled out, obviously in cinemas generally, but I'll tell you how it works. So the idea is it would pump these odors in as you're watching a film. And the idea was first presented in 1939. However, it took until 1960 for the idea to finally become reality when Todd bought Laube's technology to use together with the Elizabeth Taylor-fronted thriller the scent of mystery.
Starting point is 00:21:48 So in 1960, at last, this smell of vision technology was used for the first time. Is it still called the smell brain at this point? It was still called the smell brain. And these are the smells, the smell brain was creating for this first movie, the scent of mystery. Viewers were treated treated treated treated treated treated treated to pipe tobacco, coffee, roses, wine, gunpowder. Whoa. Shopolish, that's a weird one. Where's that come? That's not needed, is it? You don't need that.
Starting point is 00:22:16 Shoe polish. Petrel, perfume. Fresh sea air. I can see how that would be good. Peaches, bananas, brandy, wood shavings, perfume, coffee, coffee, coffee, coffee, perfume, perfume, perfume, perfume, perfume, perfume, perfume, perfume, perfume, perfume, perfume, perfume, perfume, perfume, perfume, perfume, the the the the the the the th.. th. th. that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh? Oh, oh, oh? Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, this is a nice one, fresh sea air. I can see how that would be good. Peaches, bananas, brandy, wood shavings, perfume, peppermint. They're all nice smells. They are all nice smells. And certain smells would be deliberately linked to key characters. This is the idea, for example,
Starting point is 00:22:38 tobacco would be linked with the baddie. So the baddy would come on screen, there'd be a whiff of tobacco now if you know he was approaching, or maybe perfume for the heroine, so she might be walking, she's coming close to the room and you'd get that scent and you realize she's about to enter. This is the idea. However, there was a major problem. Do you want to guess what the major problem was? It's quite funny? Well, they're playing the smells at the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their smell, smells, smells, the smell, smells, smells, smells, the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, the smell, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells the smell, smells, smells the smell, smells the smell smell smell smell smell smell smell, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, smells, the wrong times and all the kind of stuff. So the heroine comes out stinking of fags. Yeah, you can't lay, you can't layer smells that fast, don't imagine because those smells need to clear it. You're just going to pile, fart smells on top of cigarette smells on top of petrol. It's going to be mad. No, actually the problem was not with the smells. They pulled off the smells. Thethey pulled off the smells. The problem was that smell-evision cost so much money to install. This smell brain is insanely expensive. A ticket price for a film were pushed up to,
Starting point is 00:23:34 and this is mad, to 30 times their normal value. So it would normally be a dollar to watch a movie in 1960. To watch a smell of vision film it was was $30 which is equivalent to $313 to watch a film today. It's not sustainable. So the idea if you were to watch a movie now it would cost you $313 who wanted the smell. It would only be the ultra-lea to went to the cinema. It's just like the the theater isn't the theater isn't it? Absolutely, yeah. Oh my god, that's hilarious.
Starting point is 00:24:06 The cinemas try to battle, because obviously cinemas went, we're never going to get more than four people a movie, and this isn't sustainable. And it'll be the same four people who will ever smell a vision. So they try to come up with ideas to sort of mite the idea of smell brain was it it would be positioned every time you say smell brain is funny. It's such a four-year-old invention. Oh my god, imagine taking a family of five to the cinema if the tickets were 30 times more expensive than leaves Lear. Oh my god. So the idea of smell brain is it
Starting point is 00:24:40 would be positioned under each seat. Oh my god. Cinemas felt that that level price-wise was wasn't sustainable so they the they they they they they they they they they they they they th. It th. It th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's thi. It's thi. It's such such such such such such such thi. It's such thi. It's such thi. It's thi. It, cinemas felt that that level of price-wise was wasn't sustainable. So they tried to cheat by pumping the smells through the air con instead, but all that did was it just weakened the effect and you could barely smell the smell. And very quickly, smell of vision, understandably, was seen as a failure. It was a similar story with Laube's rival, a guy called Charles Weiss, who came who came who came who came th, who came th, who came th, who came th, who came th, who came th, who came th, which the th, th, th, th, a th, a th, a th, a th, a th, a th, a th, a th, a the, a failure. It was a similar story with Laube's rival, a guy called Charles Vise, who came up with his system, which is a better name system, the Aroma Rama system, in 1953. That is a not a name-smell brain. Which he attached for the 1959 film behind the
Starting point is 00:25:16 great wall and he offered smells such as incense, spices, and this third one's not quite as attractive and also might explain why it didn't work the stench of a barnyard full of geese. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! You lost me at stench and barnyard, I'm afraid. On which I think there should surely be an agreement that they only pump in nice smell and I think that should be written on the poster. Imagine if you were like either the film of all quiet on the western front or something The smell of vision it have to be absolutely disgusted I remember going to the Yorvik Viking Museum which is absolutely brilliant and they had a they had
Starting point is 00:25:53 Viking feces in a glass case and I remember thinking how do you know that's feces and not just mud Like how would it when you're when you're on an archaeological dig that looks like a thousand-year-old shit. You sit on this thing that takes you through a Viking village and they pump in the smells of Viking times. It's amazing that, I absolutely love it. Blu my mind when I was younger. And you would have thought that after the smell brain and its mad ticket prices, the smell of geese through the Aroma system that that would be the end of that. Well in fact, there was a final
Starting point is 00:26:25 twist. In 1981, the filmmaker John Waiters attempted to once again introduce sense into cinema, so not that long. 81, you know, it's not yonks ago, this time using a more modern technology, the scratch and sniff card to accompany his film. So he tried to bring the scratch andiff card as using Children in Need into the cinema. His film was called Polyester. He called his Scratch and Sniff technology, something called Odorama. That's what it obviously didn't work out because you'd ever see it in cinemars now.
Starting point is 00:26:52 However, it was that technology that then made its way onto the BBC's't even the first to try all this on TV. They took the adulation, but they weren't. A full decade earlier ITV had used something called aroma packs to accompany its broadcast of the real world in a slot called aroma vision. And the card came with that week's addition to the TV Times and featured eight odour points ranging from burnt rice pudding to talcum powder. And a very final point. And I, and. And, and I think this is where this technology is good. The French Postal Service, very, very recently, brought back the technology again from the dead and you introduce a scratch and sniff stamp featuring the smell of freshly baked baguettes, which is actually quite nice. I think, I think about this, we should have that on our stamps here
Starting point is 00:27:45 and we should get to know what King Charles smells like. I think that should be, or the Queen. Yeah, oh he uses herbal essence shampoo, that's nice. That mint one, that really, really strong. The Australian one that feels like his scalp is burning. Oh man. It's fascinating really, I kind of, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I that, I that, I that, I that, that, that, that, that, that, then, then, then, then, then, then, thin, that, that, that, that, that, I that, I that, I, I that, I that feels like his scalp is burning. Oh man. So that is smell of vision. It's fascinating really, isn't it? I kind of, I love the, the hope of it all and the, I know it's obviously just never really going to pay off repeated failures, but it is a fun idea, the idea of adding smell as an
Starting point is 00:28:18 experience to entertainment. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Credit where the idea came from and why people thought it could work. It's just because they all smelled so synthetic and so weird. But wouldn't you like, why isn't this taken off, a smelled brain in your house? In the same way as you can pick music to be on in the background, you could have a smelled brain to go, can you make this smell like a summer meadow in this house. Now that is a bloody good idea, me. You're about to make a fortune. Yeah. Oh, can you make this house smell of a sea breeze? I have seen the idea that's made you a millionaire.
Starting point is 00:28:52 Alexa turn on the smell brain. To close, if we were to release an oh what a time, scratch and sniff card, we're allowed one smell each to represent ourselves, what we're going for. I'm going custard, obviously, that's me. Oh, that's quite a nice, lovely smell. Yeah. What are you going for, Chris? I do weirdly like the smell of petrol. Really? I used to as a little kid. And I thought about it the other day, I've sort of grown up to be.
Starting point is 00:29:18 And you well? Jupe. Okay, Jeef and Curry. Links Africa. Ha ha ha ha. Well, that's it for this week. Thank you for listening. I really enjoyed that, bad ideas. And I do think, actually, and amongst all those bad ideas, we have a good idea in the smell brain for the home. If you want to become an oh what a time, full-timer, you'll get episodes ahead of everyone else. You get me one complete bit, and you get a couple of bonus episodes every month.
Starting point is 00:29:48 There's a lot of bonus episodes already there. If you want to sign up, you can go to O What a Time. to the time. For your options, but otherwise, we'll see you next week. Oh, and also, if you want to leave a review in Latin, Tom will will help. We'll see you next week. Bye. the

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.