Oh What A Time... - Best of OWAT Volume 2

Episode Date: August 25, 2024

We’re taking a summer break for 3 weeks, so while we’re off sunning ourselves, please enjoy our second ever ‘Best of’ episode. This week you’ll be treated to the following: From #26 Blunders we’ve got: the demise of Frederick Barbarossa From #28 Nightlife: Boza (a lovely drink which isn’t custard) And from #39 Survival: the nightmarish story of Alexander Selkirk If you'd like to drop us an email while we're away, you can do so at: [e-mail] If you fancy a bunch of OWAT content you’ve never heard before, why not treat yourself and become an Oh What A Time: FULL TIMER? In exchange for your £4.99 per month to support the show, you'll get: - two bonus episodes every month! - ad-free listening - episodes a week ahead of everyone else - And first dibs on any live show tickets Subscriptions are available via AnotherSlice, Apple and Spotify. For all the links head to: ohwhatatime.com You can also follow us on:  X (formerly Twitter) at @ohwhatatimepod And Instagram at @ohwhatatimepod Aaannnd if you like it, why not drop us a review in your podcast app of choice? Thank you to Dan Evans for the artwork (idrawforfood.co.uk). Chris, Elis and Tom x Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Save on home and auto like only you can at TD Insurance.com slash ways to save. T.D. Ready for you. Hello and welcome to Oh What a Time, the history podcast that tries to decide if we have selected for you the best bits from some of the episodes we've done so far because we are on our summer break. I'm Chris Skoll. I'm Tom Crane. And Ellis James is on holiday as are we actually, you know, can't lay this at his door. We've all taken a break. Well, it's actually, it's more than holiday. It's the most romantic holiday of all. It's his honeymoon. So if there's any reason for someone to earn a break is because he's got to go and do some heavy petting with his wife on a beach somewhere or a city. I haven't found out where they're going. Also, they've been together quite a while, so they may not be heavy petting either. Small to medium petting. Who knows?

Small to medium petting. Do you know what, Chris, do you know what's good episode? Most episodes, you start recording, you think, how's this going to go? Is this going to be interesting? Will we have stumbled across good stuff? Will we find the a a a. Today we know this is good stuff because it's been picked from the very best, the cream of the crop so we know this is a good episode. Absolutely, you're in for a real treat because we've just gone through every episode and pulled out bits that we know are good. This is the very best of oh what a time and this is the first of three episodes you're going to be getting on a Monday on a Monday on a thol Very, very exciting until we return with a freshly tanned and a reinvigorated Ellis James. And are you hoping to be reinvigorated when we return, Crane? Do I look like I'm not currently invigorated?

Do you look like you do some reinvigoration? Don't we all? So that's what's going to be happening over the next three weeks. And on today's episode, Chris, what are we going to be hearing about? So the best bits that you're going to get on today's episode is the demise of Frederick Barbarossa from a Blunder's episode, Bossa the drink. I love that one. That was great. The Bozer drink, which of survival episode, which was number 39. Very, very exciting. Incidentally, that Selkirk episode, Skull is one of the ones I get the most DMs about people saying, I can't believe someone lived through that.

It's a pretty insane story, and Ellis still brings it up maybe once a fortnight with us. Yeah, I still think about it. I think about it a lot. When I was going through all the bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits bits the bits the bits the bits the bits the bits the bits the bits the bits the bits the bits. When I was going through all the bits we've done, that is one bit that really sticks with me. The bit with a cat and the rats is remarkable. So do stick around to listen to that, the genuine will blow your mind. Do you what? I'm excited to actually listen to this episode. I can episodes early, all that good stuff. You can become an O What a Time full-time. And to subscribe, you can go to O'Watertime.com and see there all your options.

But hey, that's enough chat. You've got a best of episode coming right up, and here it is. Enjoy. I'm going to be discussing Frederick Barbarossa was the Holy Roman Emperor from 1155 until 1190, 35 years later. Now he was known as a red beard and if I don't shave, my beard, the thiiwaid. If I don't shave, my beard has got a slightly red tinge so I would like to hope that if I'd been Holy Roman Emperor that would have been my nickname I can't help but feel that my nickname would be slightly less serious and take the position.

I think I think it would focus more on your accent, I think we should probably would stand out. Yes, yeah, the Welsh one. Yeah. You know how that English King Ethelred the Unready? Oh yes. And I was sick to myself, bloody hell. He's been known as unready for like 1100 years. We're still, we're still taking the pace of how unready he was on podcasts over a thousand years after his death what do you think your nickname would be Tom your holy Roman Emperor so well if it's physical things they're pointing out

dad god the first and the statues would be really unflattering. It's me, with a little tiny little valley. They used to accentuate everything. So they'd probably accentuate your Dad Bod the today. So your belly will become bigger, your shoulders have become narrower, your arms are become thinner. Red beard and dad bod are the sort of-doo shirts aren't they red big that sort of things. Dad Bod the first.

If you were lucky if you're really good benevolent ruler, maybe the dad bod could be the kind of body that all Romans wanted. Also what would be quite interesting is when I hit about 50 and constantly me called Dad Bod the first had an effect on me and there'd be like a midlife crisis and the statues would start getting slightly more musly as I'm losing weight and trying to sort of change my body shape. You can see you can see the change as you went through there. Yeah, yeah, that'd be quite good. You walked down the pantheon. I assume with Ethelred the Unready, I just,think it means something like you know wise counsel and then ready isn't like an old English word for no

counsel so it was like kind of bookish the non-bookish if you know what I mean it's because he he was given bad advice I always thought it was like there's a war on oh fuck is that today shit where's my sword where are my shoe I I can't fight in the war without shoes on. That's ridiculous. Where are my southern shoes? Ethelrods! It's like, no, it's Sunday today. No, Ethel, it's Monday. It's Monday today. The war started today at night. Oh, no, bollocks. Sorry, it's because it was much of the day too, I thought it was sorry. So has my daughter got to da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da, I? I the war? I the war? I the war? I the war? I to to to to to to to to the war. I to to to to to to to the war. I the war. I the war. I the war. I the war. I the war. I the war. I the war. I the war. I the war. I the war. I the war. I the war. I the war. I the war. I the war. I the war. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I to to to th. I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. I can't to to to to th. I th. because it was match of the day too and not much of the day. I thought it was sorry.

So has my daughter got drama today? No, it's schooled. Shit. Do you know, another one I was thinking about, Edward the confessor? Oh yeah. Yeah. Basically a grass. Edward the grass.

the grass. Yeah. He will grasp you right up. He cannot keep a secret. That king, Chris Skull the Snitch. So, but anyway, he was known for his red beard. His contemporaries thought he was almost superhuman. So he was this, he had this incredible grasp of the law. He had this amazing abilities as a knight. He had chivalric qualities. Everyone just thought, everyone swooneded the their their their their their their their their their their heauned. He was was heatat, he was heat, he was, he was, he was, he was, he was, he was, he was, he was, he was, he was, he could, he could, he could, he could, he could the secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret secret, he could, he could, he could, he could, he could, he could, he could, he could, he could, he could, he could, he was. He was. He was. He was. He was their their secret. He was their their their their their their the law, he had this amazing abilities as a knight, he had

chivalric qualities, everyone just thought everyone swooned right. He was he was a big dog, he was a big deal. He made his name in the 1140s when he joined the Second Crusade. I mean the Second Crusade is almost a historical blund in his own right. We could have done that in his episode. So he he emerged from that crusade unscathed. So I assume at this point he's feeling quite lucky. And in Lem 55 he's elected Holy Roman Emperor and crowned Frederick the first in Rome. And he reigned into his death 35 years later, so he's had a good stint. He was crowned, incidentally, by the only Englishman ever to become Pope, Nicholas

Brakespeer or Adrian the Fourth. I think Nicholas is a good enough name. Yeah. Why bring Adrian into it? I would say. So what was his name was Nicholas Breakspier and then they changed it to Adrian the fourth? You're like, mate Nicholas Nicholas works. Yeah Nicholas be that. Nick Nick the first. Anyway so far so good. It's Nicholas. Is Nicholas Nicholas particularly hard to the to the the the the the name. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi. the the the the thi. the th be that Nicholas Briggs be the first. Just be Nick yeah Nick the first anyway so far so good is Nicholas particularly hard to pronounce and if you're Italian is that is that is that what the issue is is it

kind of no no I don't think so I don't think so I don't know no harder than Adrian so so far so good so most of the rest of Frederick's life was taken a to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the rest of kingship stuff. But then in 1187 a letter arrived at court asking for his assistance in repelling a fresh invasion of the Crusader kingdoms, okay? So this was to be the beginning of the third crusade. And this one's better known in Britain of course because Richard the Lionheart was involved. So Frederick March from Cologne through modern day Germany and Austria on into into Hungary, then into the Balkans, and finally he arrived at Constantinople, modern-day Istanbul, where he prepared

his crossing into Anatolia. Now by early June 1190, Frederick's halfway through his journey towards the Levant okay, when he received some local advice about a shortcut. Oh dear. Yeah, that's what I said when I was reading this. Oh dear. Now he's got two options. A longer route through the mountains or the promised fabled shorter route, which involves crossing the Salaf River, now known as the Goksu River, near the hilltop Crusader Castle of Sillykev. I don't think if you're leading an army you can't be asking

the locals for shortcuts can you? That doesn't feel like a professional thing to do. I'm you know, I'm not telling him how to lead an army but it sounds naive. It's a sort of thing you do on a pub crawl isn't it? Yeah, yeah. Do you know how you get to the uh... Yeah, yeah, you ask some some some, you know, do know, do know, do the the the the the the the the the the the to the the the the the th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to th. Do th. Do th- it th. Do th. Do to to to to to to to to to to to to to the th. It's th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do. Do, th. Do, th. Do th. Do, th. Do the the the th. the the the the. the the. the the the to-s to-s theeee. thee. the. the. the. the. the. the. the, the first clicker on it. You asked some bloke coming out of her bookies and you say, do you know what to get a Yates is? He says over there and you're like, okay, we're this way. You shouldn't be turning around to 60,000 men and going, this guy says it's through here. Now he's an action man and he's impatient, okay. So Frederick Ops for the River at thi. throwned thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tho. tho. tho. tho' tho' thi. We' tho' this way, this way, this way, we're this way, we're this way, we're this way, we're this way, we're this way, we're this way, we're this way, we're this way, we're this way, we're this way, we're this way, we're th. We th. We' th. We're th. We're thi. We're thi. We're thi. We're thi. We're thi. We're thi. We're thi. We're thi. tho. this way, this way, this way, this way, this way, this way, this way, this way, this way, this way, this way, we're this way, we're thi. thi but they all agreed that on the 10th of June, 1190, Frederick Barbarossa, who was 67 at the time, drowned in his attempted crossing. Now this is a big cock up, right, this is a big blunder, one which dealt a serious blow to the prospects of the Third Crusade. So thousands of who were as hostile to each other as they were to their opponents. So it was a real mess.

So without Barbara Ossor and his forces to act as unifier, there was almost no chance of total victory. So this is so they just go home. He's drowned. Now, a contemporary chronical of Frederick's journey from Cologne, which was a few years later in the Europe of the middle M90s, gives us the Sylvester Stallone Rambo version of the story. Okay, in this one, Frederick, who was 67 remembered, decides he can swim across the river, and so he plunges into the water, believing himself strong enough to battle occurrence. Although everyone tried to stop him, he entered into a whirlpool, he who had often escaped great dangers, perished miserably. Now the Arab chronicles are suggesting

slightly more farcical, okay, that they agree that Frederick had entered the river, not because he wanted to cross it, just because he fancied having a wash. He's been a day since he last on a shower. He stinks. He stinks. Freddy, mate, get in that river. How deep is he going to have a wash? Yeah, so you just listen. Surely, don't you just paddle and splash?

You don't need to go in beneath your... Yeah, so he thinks to himself, listen. I'll just do the important bit, I'll do armpits and my downbelows and maybe my face if I've got time. I'll gel my hair down and I'll wear a helmet anyway so I don't need to wash my hair, don't need to get the shampoo out. I've lost my washbag anyway. Now as one of the Arab Chronicles, there's a quote from that says, the Emperor, drowned at a spot with a water to not reach a man's waist. So he's had a little paddle and something's gone wrong and he's fallen in and he's drowned. Now, he's got cramp, isn't he? That's what's

happened. It's absolutely he's got cramp. Now in fact, this may not have been that far from the truth since a newsletter written by someone in Frederick's army but a week after his death tells a similar story. So in this version, Frederick, who is who is who is who is who is who is who is who's made it to the eastern side of the river, decides he wants to go for a swim, partly to cool down and partly to refresh himself. After the innumerable and unbearable labors which he didn't do it now for a month, he wished to bathe in this water, he drowned by the hidden judgment in a lamentable and unexpected accident. That makes it sound so poetic. Exactly. It was actually, he quite

fancied a paddle, something went wrong when he drowned. And thousands of men turned back because he's dead, right? Now whether he's trying to cross or simply having a wash or a swim, the outcome was the same. So he drowned, and his drowning, which meant the expected course of events, a crusader victory of Saladin, that was altered. So there's one final act to follow this sort of historic blunder. Only 5,000 of the 15,000 troops followed Frederick's son all the way to the Levant and they carried on solely because they desired to bury the man in Jerusalem. So to preserve his body they tried to pickle it in vinegar but the process failed because the stench in the summer heat proved overwhelming. Can you imagine that? So, okay, he's dead. We need to bury him in Jerusalem. Let's pickle him in vinegar after two days. Okay, Frederick stinks. Let's change a plan.

Smells really horrible, everyone. Well, I mean, I'm complaining because I'm the one bloody carrying him. You come and carry him then if you think it's all right. I had to transport a body a long distance I wouldn't say pickling it would be a great idea. No no neither would I. Who suggested that and who's agreed to it? Are we imagining in a huge jar like Gerkins and a chip shop are we imagining it like that? How are we wrapped in paper? Exactly. Like we th th th th th th th th th th th th he he he he he he he he he th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th like he's a th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. th. Who th. Who th. Who come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come come th th th th th th th th th th th th. Who th th th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who th. Who's thi. Who's tho. to to to to to to to to to to to thooo. theea. I thea' thea' the. I th shop. Are we imagining it like that? How are you imagining? Rupped in paper. Exactly.

Like he's a bucket of chips. We've talked about many times on this podcast jobs from the past they wouldn't fancy. I think pickling dead emperors would be up there. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. That's got to be up there as a job I'm not going for. question for you L, which is simply, you say that the soldiers just after he drowned just went home a lot of them, at what point, how early do you think the first, do you think the body is still floating away into the distance when one of the soldiers turned to the other one, well that's that then? Yeah, looks at his watch and says, well we could be home, the afternoon, we could be home by the afternoon, to thiiiiiiii thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, th.... th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, that, that, that, that, the, the, the, the, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to theee, thee, the, the, th around the corner. Do you think there was a large conversation about do we carry on? Do you think

like people just started ones and twos just walk your friends? I've been also looking for any excuse to go home. I mean I'm pushing that I'll go, well I think we're only right actually it's respectful we all go home. I think it's more respectful if we just go home and watch telly. Go home and watch Spartacan. And have a day off? She have a day off. I think that's the respectful thing.

Yeah, it's what he would have wanted. So he never made it to Jerusalem, Frederick Barbarossa, not even as a pickle. His body was divided up, and the parts were instead gifted to churches and cathedrals along the route south, including in modern Taki and Turkey and Tira in Lebanon. These days Bob Ross's name is perhaps better known for a much later historical plundit, namely the German invasion of the Soviet Union in 1941 when a lot of Germans froze to death. Then of course it was snow and ice-dell about the advance, not a river current but you know know the mistakes made all the same. I mean one medieval chronicler was taking the person he suggested that

Barbross had ridden into the river wearing full armor and he was thrown by his spooked horse. And then obviously the he'd drowned because his armor so heavy but they don't think that's true. That's what I'd want people to lead with. Yeah I think as I as I always been swept away by the current I'd be yelling that back to my troops. Yeah yeah. Tell them I was on my horse and it's my heavy armor. And it was a really big scary horse and I'd done well to ride it this far! Please do not pickle me! Blame the horse, blame the horse. I don't mention the fact that I was smelly until two minutes ago! How has he not come on to be known as Frederick the Pickle? That's a genuine question.

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It's been relatively left untouched, but yet here we are in the Ottoman Empire. We're on the streets of Old Istanbul. We're late in the evening. Maybe it's the winter is upon us. There's a bit of a chill in the air. You're on the busy streets. You hear someone chanting, Bosa. Bosa. Bosa. You look out from a window down onto the street and you see a man with buckets slung over his shoulder. Bosa, he cries again. One more time he's saying, acman's bozzar. And then you go up and say chuck-chch, their, he, he's their, he's their, he's they, he's they, he's they, he's they, he's they, he's they, he's they, he's they, he's their, he's their, he's their, he's their, he's they. He's their, he's their, he's their, he's is is their, he's. their, he's, he's. their, he's, he's. their, he's is is the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. thi. the. too, he's trie. trie. trie. trie. trie. trie. trie. trie. trie. tri, marvellous Bossa, and then you go up and say, Gitchakus one then, you place your order. He comes, he presents you with a drink

that is milky yellow liquid, thick, but warming with a topping of cinnamon. Well, Edvocah. Oh, yeah, it looks like eggnog. Yeah. It tookle it fights back against the chill of the evening. I had to look at what Bozzo looks like. It looks like custard and it made me think custard custard hasn't really caught on in a way that you would imagine it possibly would. Custod is wonderful stuff. If there was a guy walking down the street selling cups

of custard in my life than I have. Do you hear something absolutely ridiculous, Chris? Tom wrote... I know when it's a joke. Tom wrote a sitcom that I was one of the actors in it. So Tom obviously has the writer. Was on set every day to see how we were doing because obviously it's his grand vision. And he would walk around the set and everyone knew that Tom was the writer people respected him, they were

like this is a great script man, this is incredible. He was a polystyrene cup of coffee. It was a polystyrene cup of custard. It was a polystyrene cup of custard. It was a polystyrene cup of custard. It was a polystyrene cup. It was a coffee mug. It was, yep. I have openly heard this. And it wasn't actually a polystyre in cup. I love you know, it was a coffee mug, but I used to hold my hand over the top of it. People couldn't see it was yellow and thick and not brown like coffee is. Such a look. And more to the point I had told everyone I was on a diet and I was looking after myself. And there was a point that one of the other the other the other the other the other the other the other the other the other the other the other the other the other the other the other the other the other the other the other the other the other the other, it was a the other, it was a cup, it was a cup, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a the other, it was a the other the other the other the other other other other other other other other other other other other other.. It was a the other, their. It was a tuc. It was a coffee, tuc. It was a coffee, tuc. It was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, it was a coffee, I was on a diet and I was looking after myself. And there was a point that one of the other actors came over and said, and I quote, why can I smell custard? Which I don't think you could, I didn't even know it was

that strong a smell and I had to sort of peel my hand off and there was a cup of coffee. I will say though, custead is, I genuinely think custard is my favorite.... th cust cust cust cust cust cust cust cust cust cust cust cust cust cust. I th cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu cu custs. I. I th cust custard. I will say though, custard is, I genuinely think custard is my favourite liquid. It is. I love custard. If I could have a custard tap in my house, I would use it minimum four times. It's a boiling cup tap. It's amazing. It's delicious. It's fantastic. Why were you drinking custard again? It was just the dessert on set. Filming, long days of filming, often quite cold, I don't know. Just why not also, crucially there was custard there. I think that's the crucial thing, there was custard.

The answer to the question, why were you drinking custard? There was custard there. It was there. It's that simple when it comes to me and custard. There's nothing more complicated. It was there, so I drank it. Oh man. Again, you've proved my point. Custad cusad cusad.

Custod tars. Yeah. Yeah. Is it, am I right in thinking? That is quite a British thing. I suppose the Portuguese c it in, oh what's it, what those little, like custard tar, Portuguese custard tar? Pastel Danata, yeah. They have a sort of custody stuff in there.

So is that, is that a custody, like sort of birds? It's a bit thicker. Okay. But it's very nice. It's a lovely drop. I should explain that Bossa, this Turkish drink, almost nothing in common with custard other than it looks a bit custody. And that can come out.

But it's actually a malt drink made by fermenting various different grains like corn and wheat. And it is one of Turkey's oldest beverages. Okay, so it's still big, is it? Well, it was enormous. It was massive. As I said what is, it is still quite big in different regions of Turkey but it's nothing like it was. So Bossa was a regional speciality available throughout the southeastern Europe and Anatolia but particularly loved in Ottoman Turkey. In the 17th century one traveler

to Istanbul noted hundreds of bozah shops and thousands of employees. Just imagining hundreds of custard shops. Imagine custard c. This seems like my absolute dream city. I love it. Thousands of employees. Custain shops, fantastic. Bossa. You'd go on holiday and never leave. The Turkish Custard Crisis of 1700. So hundreds of Bossa shops, thousands of employees, and then there's Bozer Sellers who walk the streets at night. So this is a big thing about the nightlife. You're getting Bozer Sellers walking around at night.

Sometimes they're ringing bells, they're shouting Boza as I alluded to at the start. And Boza was seen as a bit of a nighttime drink because Bossa can go off. So it's something that's sold mainly, it can go off in the heat of the day, I should add. It's something that's mainly sold in the evening and in the winter and it comes in sweet and sour versions. The sweet Bossa is more often the one that's bought in the street. The sour version is alcoholic and you get that in th of th of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of of that in kind that in kind of of that in kind of that in kind of that in that in that in the thoze. Soa. Soa. Soa. Soa. Soa. Sooze. So, the thi. the thi. Soa. thi. thi. Boz. Bozah. Bozah. Bozah. Bozah. Bozah. Bozah. Bozah. Bozah. Bozah. Bozah. Boze. Boze. Boze. Boze. Boze. Boze. Boze. Boze. Bo. Bo. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, the th. So, the the the the the the th. th. the th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thozza. thozza. thozza. thozza. thozza. thozza. thozzozzozzozee. thi. thi.that's bought in the streets. The sour version is alcoholic and you get that in kind of Bozain. So that's alcoholic is it that one? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bozane is kind of like a pub.

John, Tom Crane would be dead within the hour if he could, if he could get pissed an alcoholic custard. Just to be clear, when I was spotted drinking custard at half. I want to make that happen. I, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, th, that, th, thi thi thi, tho, tho, thi, that, thi, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, is that's that's, is that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that custard. I want to make that... I hadn't, it wasn't an Irish custard. I hadn't put... Get whiskey in it. Whatever is you put in it. Why can I smell my skin custard? Exactly. It was a completely tea-total custard. Anyway. The Bozain is kind of like a pub for Bossa, but now I'm imagining a pub that sells the custard instead of pints. Yes. That'd be, you'd love that. Oh, I'll be nice. Yeah, absolutely.

If one of the taps was custard, if it was Heineken, Guinness, whatever, Samugel custard, at a point in the night I'm going to have a custard. It won't be a pint of custard. I'm not mad. I definitely have half a pint of custard within the first three drinks. I'm not mad. You've got to be having a pint of custard if you're going into a custard pub. And just before I leave to go home I'd have a final half pint of custard. From the way. Nightcap custard. And there'd also be a point in the evening when I walk back to the table

and I'm carrying four points of custard to my friends and my friends are like what have you done? What have you done? Anyway, I think it's perfectly normal. So the Bojane is where you could buy some bozah but also some food they would sell kebabs at the bozahs but rather than you know the turning keb of a lighten the the the the the the the the the the the they. but butler is is is is. but. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But. But, but, but, but, rather, rather, rather, rather, rather, rather, rather, rather, the, the, the, the the the the the, the the, the, the the, the, the, the, the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the the they, they, they, they, turning, turning, turning, turning. So. So. So. So. So. So, turning. So, they. So, they. So, they. So, they. So, they. So, they. So, they. So, they. So, they. So, they. But, they. But would be turned manually on the spit. Someone's manually, an employee's doing that turning it around. Again a job from history that I think yeah I'd probably I could do that. I could handle the turning of the spit. But you also get flatbreads, fruit, minced balls of liver, awful. Now there was a version of bozzer that was controversial, the Tatar bozzar, so called because it was laced with opium. Oh wow, there's a way. Okay, this, this is how Tom Braid meets his end.

Now Custon is quite a comforting drink. Now custead it with opium. You're having the deepest sleep of your life. I didn't think I'd have to make this little note twice in an episode, but just to be clear, when I was caught drinking custard at half-tour TV set, it wasn't custard containing opium. I really hope that's the final footnote of this episode. I don't want to keep going back to that moment in my history,

but there's no opium, but the idea of a thick drink before doing something like opium feels like a weird, isn't it like a thick, heavy, eggy drink and then some opium? I'm no expert, it doesn't feel like the natural bed fellow, does it? I'm fine to say that when I went to Lau, when I was traveling in Asia, I ate an opium pizza and I don't know what happened to me but I felt really sleepy I went back and I slept and when I woke up I thought the Virgin Mary was at the foot of my bed. Right. Offering you are a custard. To be fair I get sleepy after a domino so I don't think is that unusual. You sure it wasn't just quite heavy pizza. Maybe it was the pizza. So anyway, right, so if you're drinking opium-laced bozzar, obviously you're on the risk

of getting thrown out of the establishment. Here's the thing they did in these bogein, which is that they would have to be a kind of referee. Think of it like a referee there, he's kind of like a quasi-bouncer. The individual is usually an older, elderly customer who acts as a referee of the establishment and what he says goes. Oh. So it's kind of like a bouncer without the physically kind of intimidating aspect. Like a respected elder, basically that. And people would would say stuff like bloody he could drink a lot of custard back up there I've seen him done pint after pint of custard he's a comedy writer actually he does his history podcast yeah can anyone smell opium would that work today

would that work today the idea with some old guy I'm not sure it would but I like the idea I do like the idea I think it might it might it maybe thi I thi I I I he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he could yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could th could could could could could the the the he could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could could the the the the the the the the the that that that that the that that that that that that that that that that th might that that that that that th might thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi that that that that the the the thi the the that that that thi that that that thi that work today the idea with some old guy? I'm not sure it would, but I like the idea. I do like the idea. I think it might, it may be would. Absolutely. Because you'd kind of respect that, you know, it's not the idea of the bounces is quite confrontational, the responsibilities of a bouncer. But if it's an older person. And I suppose they're also, you're right, respect is the thing. There would would would would would would would would would would would would the the, the, the, the, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. the, it might, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it may, it may, it may, it may, it may, it may, it may, it may, it may, it may, it may, it may, it may. It might, it may, it may, it may, it may, it may. It might, it may, it may, it may. It might, it may, it may, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It might, it, it, it, it might, it. It might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it might, it If anyone had a problem with him, then everyone else in the pub is going to back around this guy because he's respected, you know, they'll become one and hopefully deal with the issue if that makes sense, rather than just seeing what the bouncer does. Yeah, okay, no, I'm with you on that. I'm sold. I like that. So again, on this aspect of nightlife. into the night. There were night travelers very much part of parcel of Istanbul's evening culture and economy, easily romanticized now but they've

all gone. That whole kind of culture of the Bozah Seller has disappeared. The Bozah still exists but mainly at shops, delicatessens, ice cream parlors, traveling street vendors. The Baza went out of fashion largely due to kind of Ottoman and Turkish elites who were preferred the modern refinery of European beverages like coffee,, the the the the the the the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, but th, but th, but th, thi, but the, but the, but the, but the, thi, thiolnante, the, the, but thiolome, but thiolom, but thi, but thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thia, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, thoomoma, thooma, thoan, thoan, thoan, thoan, thoan, thoan, thoan, ththe modern refinery of European beverages like coffee, red wine, German beer in the 20th century. These new drinks kind of phased out the bozzer and so yeah they've been put back into these shops and they're seen as a kind of, it's a bit of a gimmick now it's seen as in Istanbul, a bit of a romanticized gimmick, similar to kind of old man pubs with like antique bar billiard boards and skittle alleys. So they're there really, the bozard drink kind of harkens back to an older time. Absolutely fascinating.

Well, I'm enough to give one a go. Next, if I'm in Turkey, I'm going to have a boss. Yeah, 100% percent. But then Chris, isn't that true of every drink? Okay, I am going to talk to you lovely boys today about a man that some believe is the real Robinson Crusoe. Okay, I am going to talk to you lovely boys today about a man that some believe is the real Robinson Crusoe. Okay, this is a man, incredible story to survive on this, a man by the name of Alexander Selkurt, who from 1704 survived a man, incredible story to survive on this, a man by the name of Alexander

Selkir, who from 1704 survived four years and four months living on an island alone in the South Pacific. So before we start, let's just ask a simple question. How do you think you would do, honestly, on a desert island? Awful. What skills do you have and how long are you surviving? I want you to be honest about this. What's the honest answer? The thing I think about being stranded on a desert island is,

if you can survive that first month, you'll probably be all right. But that's a good point. Yeah, that's a good point. I don't know how, I mean, knowing that Chris has nothing to back that up with whatsoever. That's a really good point. I mean, you can survive the first month. If you can find a water source and something to eat, then it's like a vending machine. Yeah, I mean I, because what I'm saying is I would be dead on day two. And so if I can somehow survive those first three weeks, then that changes things, isn't it?

I mean, the loneliness would be insane. Yes, absolutely. I read a lot of books about the Lebanon hostage crisis. I read Terry Waite's book, and I read John McCarthy's book. Terry Waite was in solitary confinement for four and a half years. Yeah. He was telling himself his own life story because he had no one to talk to.

I often think about Albert Speer who was the kind of chief architect of the Nazis. Yeah, of the Nazis. When he went to prison in Spandau, what he did, he would walk around the courtyard and in his mind walk around the world. So he would count his paces, figure out how far he was walking, and in his mind walk from one place throughout the world to another and he would be reading about these places and imagining them in his mind. Wow. I think about that as a way of retaining sanity. I've often thought if I was prison, that's not a bad idea. When I read Terry Waite's book,

I was absolutely blown away at his mental strength. Like it is genuinely gobsmacked because of, because John McCarthy and Brian Keenan were together so they were obviously able to, they were able to talk and then they were in with some American hostages as well. Terry Waite for the majority of it was on his own. I remember when I was doing my MA, I was doing in the Second World War and I interviewed a blog from Swansea and Swansea was bombed very badly during the Blitz. I love Swansea, I love the people of Swansea, but it was rebuilt on the sort of cheap in the 60s, so I wouldn't say that the Swansea City Centre is as beautiful as some other city centres. Let's put it that way. Right, okay. A bit like Coventry and a bit a bit a bit like, a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, I, a bit, a bit, a bit, I, th, th, th, th, I, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, I I I I I, th, I, th, th, I, th, th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, th, thi, thi, thi, than, toooan, tooan, tooan, tooan, than, than, than, than, than, than, than, than, than it that way. Right, okay. A bit like Coventry and a bit like Plymouth, I suppose. He remembered, because I mean I did my M8 almost 25 years ago,

he could remember Swansea before the Blitz, and he used to, when he closed his eyes, he could walk around Swansea as it used to be. And obviously there were lots of Victorian buildings, it was quite an attractive city I think before the bode but but but but but but but but he, amazing. Yeah, yeah. So what are you imagining then? Let's say you're on this beach. First of all, can I just ask a question now? Are you doing this when you sit there, are you thinking about walking around Swansea before you build shelter? Because if you are doing that, then you are fat. Because I can't, I can't prioritize. That's anyone who has ever worked with me knows this. The night is closing in. Do I have a water source? No.. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I th. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that. I that's that's that's that's that's th that's that's th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. Are. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. to to to to to to to to to to that. that. that. that. that. that. that. th. th. this. The night is closing in. The night's

closing in. Do I have a water source? No. Do I have anything to eat? No. Do I have any shelter? No. Do I have any way to sleep? No. Am I cold? Yes. Do I have fire? No. What am I doing? I'm imagining a year of 2016 but this time we win it and I've got a smile on my face. And I'm up front. Yeah, I'm a missing piece of a jigsaw. And all the girls that turned me down in sixth form were there in the front row. Yes. They see me scoreback. I'm added by water bottles and shelter of accommodation. And that's going to sustain me for four and a half years. Am I going to write SOS in small white pebbles on the beach? Can't be bothered because it's the semi-finding against Portugal.

And what's this? Well, one-nil up. Chris, I'd like to apologize for being so sort of catty about your comment about surviving the first month. I do see what you're saying there. You are right. If you can do those basics, maybe it gives you more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more more of a chance ahead of the sort of mental term or them are come to follow. So Selkirk's journey, it's completely crazy what happened. In September 1703, Selkirk joined the crew of a ship called the Sink Ports, the five ports as it set off on an expedition to the South Pacific Ocean.

So that's the start of it. And he'd kind of had a really tricky childhood in Scotland. He was born 1676. He had gone to sea as a buccaneer after sort of getting to trouble a lot through his youth and then his early adulthood, and much of this was because he had this terrible temper, okay? And this is one of the key things that would lead him to this situation, just an awful temper, one that continued to cause him problems even when he was at sea sea sea sea sea sea sea captains. Now with that in mind, would you like to try and guess why he became Maroon? Because this is bonkers. Did they chuck him off the boat? Yeah, it's not far off. Any further guesses, Chris? It's even mad on there. Well, I was going to say the ship went down and he kind of survive, but that's in battle. Like if someone's making a decision to chuck him off the boat, that is horrendous. Well, Ellis is definitely closer. So he joined this crew, the sink ports, they set off the sunker ports on an expedition to the South Pacific Ocean. And life on board this ship,

it's worth saying, was really, really tough, really tough, toubbts. their lives to sort of plunder Spanish ships, which were the main thing they were doing, and they ate tough sea biscuits, they had dried peas, shark meat, and the other treat they had was the occasional tired seabird, as it described. So when it was sort of like a seagull would come close, they would kill the seagull and eat the sea or like or like a cormera or whatever. Like a desperate.'s kind of. Uh, diet. Exactly, yeah. For me, the things that get me through a stressful situation, I don't know about you are, are sleep. And wine. And food.

And custard. Cust. So the food is awful on there. Well, it is genuinely. Food gets me through an awful thing. And I think, oh, well, at least I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get I'll get the their their to their to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their the. the the the theat. theat. theat. theat. theat. theat. theat. theat. theat. theat. theat. theat. the me through an awful thing. And I think, oh, well, at least I'll get to sleep. But they didn't get to sleep either. They slept in wet clothes and mildewed bedding. It was the whole thing was pretty horrific, okay? However, this wasn't the worst of it.

Due to run-ins with the Spanish and French ships, the boat became so riddle with holes was just terrible and eventually that's what I do. Selkirk, that's what I would do. I would say just like give me one job to do and I'll do that. Okay and if it's the pump in the water I'll do that and I'll just get my head down and I'll pump the water and I will and I will regret with every fiber of my being that I ever join that fucking that is what that is what I would do. Now we know what that he that he that is what he that is what he that is what he that is what he that is what he that is what he that is what he that is what he that is what he that is that is what he that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is what is what is what is what is what that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is what is what is what is what is what is what is that is what is what is what is what is that is what is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is that is what I that is what I that is what I that is what I that is what I that is what I that is what I that is what I that is what I that is what I would that is what I gets the better of him, I said he can't take any of this anymore. Yeah, and I think it's fair enough in this situation. He's like, I can't do this. I'm in a shit that's leaking. I'm eating seagulls and my bedding smells of seaweed.

He's a hot head in a bad situation. Exactly. To make some steroids and cocaine. Exactly. What we want to just to make this situation a little bit more combustible, chuck in some steroids and some cocaine. Well, it's knocked off in Columbia. That's where it really got one. Things really to get said. So he gets angry. He turns to the captain. He said, he says to him, but he would rather be marooned on an island than risk more time on this god-forsaken boat. And his captain took him on his word, so they take him to an island.

That's embarrassing like we have around and you go, I don't even want to be on this boat. All right, fine, all right. Exactly. Surely, surely you're starting to backtrack. They drop him on the island, just west of Chile, an island which is now known as Robinson Crusoe Island. As you say Chris, surely as you're dropped on the sand, you're claiming it was, you would just, it was just come up. I was joking, I'm trying to make a piece! Well, most impressingly, Ellis, there's records of him being dropped on the beach, initially sort of pretending he was all right with it, the boat, the boat started to move away and then the other shipmates saw him running back out into the surf trying to stop the boat saying please don't please don't please

don't oh you're joking you would think about that every day for four and a half exactly and the boat left and there he was alone the only person on this island oh wow that that day one imagine yeah it's horrendous it's a hens also he's an angry guy. A lot of coconuts being lobed about. I don't know the calmest person I know is, but the calmest person I know would be angry. But he is. His temper has lived on for hundreds of years.

Like the guy's an angry guy. Do you think that anger would subside over the ensuing four and a half years? Do you think maybe it'd mellow out? Well you'll find out, actually. You will find out. Day one, he killed four monkeys with coconut. That just so did it. Did he the head.

No. So, I'm going to give you a list here. It's an interesting one, let's see what your take is on this. He was left with his bedding, okay, that's a start, although we do know that's mildewy and wet, as we've found out. You take it. A musket, a musket, that's true, a musket, his knife, some navigation tools, cooking utensils, okay, his Bible, and finally, these are the big ones, the the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th........ Tobobobob. Tob. Tob. Tobo, th. Tobo, th. Tobo, th. T. The. T. The. The. The. T, th. T, th. The. T. The. The. The. The. The, th, th. T, th. T, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, that, that, that, that, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, th.. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. M. A. M. M. M. M. Mus. Mus. A. Mus. A. Mus. A. Mus. A. Mus. A. Mus. A. A. Mus. A. A. Mus. A. A. Mus. A. Mus. A. Mus. A. Mus. Aobacco. Imagine rationing that. Imagine giving up bags. Has that last roll-up comes around?

Jesus Christ! Giving up bags on a desert island alone for four years. It'd be fucking horrible. Please let them be some nicotine patches in here as well. Imagine that last shot of rum and that last cigarette. I'm saying the rum is going on day one, isn't it really? Surely that's going on day one? Imagine if he had a mega lash up on his own. And I've just drunk four years worth of rum. And then the hangover without the ability to do any of the things you do to eliminate a hangover, disappear, no fry-ups, no holly-ups. Checking the delivery options, nothing.

Deliver who does not recognize this post-course. It looks like you're not close to home right now. I think it's not too bad, barring you know like a little boat with it. The knife is useful, the musket is useful. And so Selkirk, he settles into life on the island and to be fair he nails it. First he builds a shelter. He learns how to hunt for food. Initially he found it easy to catch fish but he said they occasioned a looseness

in my bowels as the way described it. So they made they gave him diarrhea. So he then just started eating what he described as the huge island lobsters were actually clawless crayfish with the things he ate first of all. No toilet paper so the diarrhea would be. That's not ideal is it? But you have got the sea. Yeah. And also there aren't other people that maybe doesn't matter so much. I think diarrhea on some level is a social problem, isn't it? There's our next t-shirt. Yeah. If you're completely on your own in your desert island, wearing no clothes just letting it flow out of you. Like, I don't know it matters that much to be honest.

No, I think I want dignity until death. T-Junabdu. I would be walking around that desert island with no clothes on. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. T. There. There. There. There. There, the next. There, the next, the next, tie. There, tie. There, tie, tie, tie, tie, the next, the next. There's tie, the next, the next, the next, the next, the next, the next, the next, the next. There's the next. There's the next. There's the next. There's. There's. There's. There's. There's. There's. There's. There's. There's. There's. There's. There, the next. There, the next. There, the next. There, tie. There, tie. There, tie. There, tie. There, tie. There, tie. tie. tie. te. te. te. T-a's tea' tea'er's tea' te. There's te. There's te. There's te. There want dignity until death. Tijon Abdu. I would be walking around that desert island with no clothes on, diarrhea running around my leg, literally saying whatever, whatever, again and again. Yeah. Are you making little dock leaf pants or not, Ellis? What's your? Yes, always dignity. So he eats the gray fish, then he thinks, okay, I'm going to get a taste something new. Next, he got really good at chasing goats on the steep hills above the bay, which he would do barefoot.

How good you're going to be at chasing a goat down in your barefoot? What are you thinking, Chris? And why are they going to go to those? I'm a bit surprised by that? Well it's an island. it as he described it he could have any goat he wanted which feels like a sort of weird bragg at a bar doesn't it? I can have any goat I want you mean that's our skilled I am and then in the evenings he would prepare a hearty goat broth with turnips watergress cabbage palm all season with black pimento pepper. I mean that's not easy to better than me pepper. I mean that's... That's just starting to sound quite nice, isn't it? Okay, he's eating better than me. Right.

I'm now jealous of this guy. I'm jealous of Marooned Diarrhea Lona Angry Man. He has, he does have full after after the today. That's true. He has the expanse of the day. mind about I've got a hang and wash him. He also kept his mind active by reading his Bible and ruminating on it for hours on end. The Bible would be an, I mean this sounds like a terrible pun, would be an absolute godsend, wouldn't it? Yeah, because you don't... Well any book the book they gave was a breastfeeding manual. Is that what it was? So he begged for books and eventually they were like, all right there, we'll find you something and the book the game was a breastfeeding man he was like, thanks. All this is feeling like he's getting a good grip of things. There were some

issues on the island. For example, he had a quite a sort of sizable rat problem was one of the major issues on the island. It was like, had to guess how he dealt with that? He fucked the rats. As a warning. I would, you'd have to be killing the rats all the time, wouldn't you? That would be constant killing rats. Well, you see, this really shows that you guys would not make it on an island. What he did was he found some feral cats, he domesticated them, and then they killed any rats that came near their camps. This guy is a genus. This guy is a genius. Therass. There's goats their their their their their their their there's there's there's there's there's their their their their their their their their their their their their th. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. T. th. that. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. to. the. to. to. thee. to. the. they. the. the. the. the. th is. It's incredible. What is it? The ecosystem on this island. There's cats, there's goats, there's rats, like, what is this place? Yeah. He's ended up in Darby or Lutonos. Oh, it's Jersey. I should mention you. I didn't think islands would have this much going on. I would expect to be dropped in Desana

nothing. You imagine a little sort of semicircle of sand in one palm true. Is that what you're imagining? The classic? The cartoon? This sounds ridiculous. I really like cats. I've been like, this isn't too bad actually. Because I, our cats brought in a mouse the other day and it was bad. I hate rats. I've got far less of a problem with mice, but I think rats are just, they really creep me out. Yeah, and they're big aggressive fuckers as well. So he's done really well there by domesticated cats. One absolute legend. I wouldn't even know how to go about domesticating a cat without any tin tunnel. Well, yeah, you need to buy a box of dreamies from from Sainsbury.

They bloody love them. I could tell you something, there's about 15 cats that aren't our cats that keep coming into our garden and coming into our house. So I imagine. If you just, if you don't want the cat to come towards you, they'll come towar. Just look aloof and you'll be he initially suffered from deep depression, after 18 months he became, as he described it, thoroughly reconciled to his condition. So Chris is how you say, how would you feel? He said it took about 18 months of sadness and then he was like, okay this is my lot, I'm okay with this. And then suddenly at this point a ship hoves into view. Okay? Excitement. Great, I'm saved. I'm saved. Oh no it's a Spanish It's a Spanish. this this this tha sa s a Spanish. tha. tha. thiiiiiii. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. theeeeeeea. theeea. theeeeeeeoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo I'm saved. Oh no, it's a Spanish vessel. The problem with this is that would have meant certain death. Why? Okay, so he was then forced to hide and

let the ship pass. I may remind you, his previous job was as a British buccaneer looting Spanish ships. So very much the enemy. He had to hide. They were on the island for a while. Eventually they leave. And it wasn't the only time time time time time time time time time time time time time the the the the the the the thiiiiiii. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. to. to. toe. toe. toea. toea. toea. toea. toea. toe. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the the the te. the the the te. the the the the the the the the te. the the. toe. toe. toe. toe. the eventually they leave. And it wasn't the only time this happened. And another occasion, another Spanish ship comes. He thinks, oh, I'm going to be saved. Spanish people come on to shore. They spot him this time. He has a run into the forest away from the captors. He hides up a tree only for see him in the branch above but that would have been the end of him. But then finally... I wonder if they destroyed his shelter because can you imagine how a heart-breaking that would

be. Horrendous. That's such a good point. Yeah, taking all your stuff. Yeah, making your cat. Yeah, exactly. But then finally, on the second of February 1709. A British vessel, the Dukekekekekekekekekeked. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, toe, to-in, to-in, to too, too, to to to to to to to to to to to too, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their, their, their, their, their, their, their their their their their their their the the the the the, the. the. too. too. too. too. too. years and four months after he first got there, a British vessel, the Duke commanded by Woods Rogers, lands on the island and they are able to rescue Selkirk. And Rogers later wrote the Selkirk was ecstatic with joy and when given the choice to stay or leave, Selkirk did not hesitate, which to me doesn't sound that surprising. I don't know what answer he was expecting at that point. How attached you'd have to be to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to, to, to, to, to, to, to, and, and, and, to, and, and, to, and, and, and, to, and, and, and, and, to, and, and, and, and, the their, their, their, their, and, their, their, their, and, their, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, they......a, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the you'd have to be to the cats you'd think, no, I'm going to stay here. And Selkirk is taken onto this boat, he's immediately made a senior

member of Roger's crew. They just think this guy's amazing. He survived. This guy has such incredible skills and they escalate him up the ladder and they make him really senior on this boat that's rescued him. And when he eventually arrives in Britain, the Britain, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, their their th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, he's to thi, thi, thi, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to thi, he's thi, he's thi, he's the, the, the, the the thee thea, thea, thea, thea, thea, thea, thea, thea, the world there for a couple more years before he gets home again. That would piss me off. It's annoying when you're getting on like a long haul fly and it's delayed by an hour. Yeah. Yes, absolutely. Oh, come on, guys.

Come on. I wonder if the conditions were like his first ship. And he was like, to be honest, I prefer the is, I's, I's, to to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be to be to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to me, to me. to me. to me. to me. to me. to me, to me, to me, to me, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a to me. too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, to me. toe. too, the island to these mildewed sheets. No, this is a much better ship. It has far more success and he actually is successful. They make some great plunders. He makes great wealth from it himself, but nothing compared to when he gets home, because he gets home after eight years away and suddenly he becomes this huge celebrity. He's this guy who's lived on an island alone, like an action hero and he suddenly makes thisfall of money. People are writing books about him. He's being, you know, appearing at events. He's just making loads of money and suddenly becomes very, very wealthy.

But what's interesting about it, okay, is he really struggled with this fame and this new life, so much so that he said, I'm going back to sea again. So after all that, he has all this wealth, huge house, no need to work at all, th all, th all, th all, to work, to work, to work, to work, to work, to work, to work, to work, to work, to work, to work, to work, to work, to work, to work, to work said I'm going back to sea again. So after all that, he has all this wealth, huge house, no need to work at all, everything he needs, but he decides after a couple of years, I can't do this, and he goes back to sea. And eventually, I don't get this guy. I cannot relate to this man at all. He has skills I will never have. And that's a day of to work. to work. to work. to work to work to work to work to work to work to work to work to work to work to work to work to work to to work to work to work to work to work to work. to work. to work. to work. to work. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to this man at all. He has skills I will never have.

And that's dudes that I do not share. Have a day of man. He served born the HMS Weymouth, which is engaged in anti-piracy patrols off the coast of West Africa. And then it was on board that ship in 1721. At the age of 45, he contracted yellow fever and he died. And as the ship's log recorded, December 13, 1721, North to North West, small breeze and fair,

took three Englishmen out of a Dutch ship, and at 8 p.m. Alexander Selkirk died. And as always, in these situations, which is always what happened when you died at sea, they just lobbed his body overboard. That's what happened. That's what happened. That's thoe. That's the end. That's the end. That's the end. That's the end. I the end. I the end. I the end. I th. I th. I th. I th. I was. I was. I was. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thea. the. the. the. the.berty overboard. Do you want to be buried at sea or lobed overboil? It's a very good point, Ellis. A very good point. A bit of dignity to the man. They gently placed to... You lob at a tennis ball. Okay. They lovingly placed him in nature's coffin to see. Okay. So I was just thinking about that. If I was feeling peaky, the amount of times I'd be saying to be saying. Doe. Doe. Doe. Doe. Doe. Doe. Doe. Doe. Doe. Doe. Doe. Doe. Doe. Doe. Doe. Doe. Doe. Do just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just. Do just just. Do just to be to be to be to be to be to to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be I was feeling peaky, the amount of times I'd be saying to people beforehand, if you are going to put me in the sick, do just check,

I am dead before you. Yeah. Drop me in the ocean, please do check. However, final thing, would you like to know the perfect twist in all of this? Yeah. Selkirk had been right about the sunk ports and how safe it was th. ago, and it did in fact sink off the coast of Peru, drowning everyone but for a handful of the crew. Wow. So had he stayed on that boat, there's a good chance. That would have been to the end of him all those many years ago. That is a good fact. That's amazing.

So that is the story of the man who some believe inspired Robinson Crusoe Mr. Alexander Selkirk, a man who could not be any different from Alice. There you go, that is your first of three best-of-epsoors you're going to be getting over the next few weeks. Hope you enjoyed that. Again, Alexander Selkirk, absolutely terrifying. Don't forget if you want even more, O-Water Time. And in fact, next week's best of episode and what will be out now for subscribers, if you want all that good stuff, add free, bonus episodes, etc., etc. Go to O-Water Time. You can see your options for subscribing, but otherwise we'll see you next week. But part two of our O'Batter Time best job episodes.

See you then. Bye. I you the