On Display with Melissa Gorga - Cup of Joe (w/ Joe Gorga)
Episode Date: March 3, 2022Fresh off their appearance on Watch What Happens Live, Melissa and Joe sit down to chat about Melissa's recent spat on Housewives, the crazy month they've had, and what Joe saw in Melissa that he didn...'t see in his previous girlfriends. The two also dip into the bank of listener questions and provide some great advice on how to enjoy life while in a financial rut (trust us, they've been there too). This week's sponsors: Nectar: nectarsleep.com Shipstation: shipstation.com, offer code: MELISSA (60-day free trial)
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You're listening to Melissa Gorga on display with me, Melissa Gorga on podcast one.
You're a funny guy, bro.
You're a funny guy.
No, you're a funny.
You're a funny.
I love you. What's up everybody? We are back for another episode of
Undesplay with Melissa Gorga.
Undesplay, Undesplay.
How did you know everything?
Did you think I was going to start singing?
Undesplay, Undesplay.
That was so embarrassing when I did that on season three.
No, it wasn't.
Yes, next to the piano.
That was like so weird.
No, it wasn't bad.
When I go back and watch it, I was the best. Yes, next to the piano, that was like so weird, right?
You know, when I go back and watch it,
I notice two things.
My nose is completely different,
and it just has the bump in it.
No one realizes that I only did the bump.
I never really did the tip.
I really wanted you to do the tip still.
I only did the bump, but my makeup was really good in it.
I had great makeup on. Oh my God, the makeup on. I had great makeup on, But my makeup was really good in it.
I had great makeup on. Oh my God, the makeup on.
I had great makeup on.
But you know, I'm just standing there by piano
just singing.
I just wanna say as a first timer
on the Real Housewives of New Jersey,
that took a lot of guts.
Who just stands there and sings a capella?
Wait, did you even introduce me?
No, you just...
Guys, I forgot to tell everybody my guest for today. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you just guys, I forgot to tell everybody my guest for today. Yeah.
18 years later, they forget about you. You just started talking. So I thought people would
assume, but that's kind of funny. You're right. Okay. So sorry, I started to sing and then
Joe chimed in. So, you know, he's very impatient. Let me give you a proper introduction.
Okay, but go ahead. I want a good one. Oh, how about one as if you're not my husband, just like as if you are the star in
Joe Gorga. There you go. Okay. Okay. Okay. Everyone, for this podcast, I have a very special,
funny guest. This guy, I would say he's on a reality TV show. He works really, really hard.
He's an up-and-coming comedian. He's known to be a great father, a great husband.
I'll stand in father and husband. I'm doing this introduction.
And just an overall really hard work in. Good guy. Ladies and gentlemen, here we have Joe Gorga.
Hello everybody. Thank you for having me, Melissa Gorga.
You're welcome. Thank you for being here. I'm so happy you came to our living room today.
I'm so honored.
I'm very honored.
You know what?
Normally, we do the podcast from my office,
but we are home today in my house.
And we're in our dining room, actually.
And so you might hear a dog bark.
You might hear a genome yell.
You might hear an Antonia bitch something.
They do.
Definitely. And you know, Joey say he's something. Thank you, definitely.
And you told Joey say he's hungry.
That could definitely happen as well.
But let's go back to on display when you were singing.
You know what the most embarrassing moment of that episode was?
Uh-huh.
Because everything about you is amazing,
because I love when you sang.
I tell you what it is.
You like when I sing.
I love it.
I think sometimes when I watch it back,
I actually, guys, I know this,
like, I actually can like hold a tune
I can or else I wouldn't like I have a little melody
Yeah, yeah, I have a little I have a little harmony in my system
I'm not an amazing singer, but I can hold a note
It was great. You were awesome, but you know the funniest moment in the most embarrassing moment was when you
Right before the episode I was in the room and you got on your hands and these and you prayed to God.
It's a please God.
That's not that episode.
That was that was that is that is fun.
But that was that was a real moment.
People real she was shaking in her skin.
I really was scared to death and they that he now just talking about the season finale
of season three when I like performed for the first time.
And that's when Caroline Manza was on the show.
Al being Chris where they're watching Jack Loretta.
They were all there to support your sister.
And I had to perform for the very first time.
And I had choreography and dancers.
And I was so stressed out.
And I was backstage praying on my knees
to the Lord Jesus Christ
himself.
Wasn't I?
Yes, you were.
And let me just tell you, that was some real.
I go back and watch it now.
I'm making the sign of the cross.
And I was seriously stressed out.
Nobody realizes, like now I'm a little bit more com cool and collected.
But that was like my first time on a reality TV show.
The whole world seemed to be like coming down.
I mean, I was like, why am I singing in front of a TV,
the world, it wasn't, it didn't air yet.
So I wasn't ever on TV yet.
I was literally just filming this show.
And I'm like, I'm about to sing
and the whole world's gonna watch it.
Like this is crazy.
So I truly was on my knees praying to God.
I was checking her underwear.
The sign of the cross.
There was a brown stain on it.
That's how I feel.
She just looked at me like. I was so weird.. The sign of the cross. There was a brown stain on it. That's how it is.
She just looked at me like.
I'm so weird.
She just jumped out of her.
Who is that?
Guys, he's lying.
And that's just like a weird thing.
Sometimes I think men, and now we're going to jump to a different subject because of that.
I think that men are go backwards.
Like I feel like he's getting more immature.
So ladies, please do.
Let me know.
I do.
Like he says things like that. He didn't use to say that when we date or like because we're fun. What are we going
to take everything serious? No, I know. Your whole life is serious. I think you talk like
you you revert back to like your younger years because I went to work. I got up this morning
at five o'clock in the morning with the work all day stressed. I agree. Okay, but are you
the old day? I want to come on. I don't want to be serious. Right? And you can't be serious,
but I'm saying a lot of the things you do not just that
Do you remind me that like I'm dating a high school back to you do I like I just shut up
I don't tell you I just look the other way the problem is with women
I gotta get loud. I'm a tie and show me your ear talks so I like to speak loud
I'm a Italian and that's how I grew up so
When the problem is what met women. I'm Italian and that's how I grew up. So when the problem is what met women,
I'm gonna be honest with you, especially women,
you, you like nitpick every little thing.
Oh my god, he said that or you did that.
You put the tape, you put the cup on the table too loud.
How many times have I heard that?
Oh, because that's the thing you've been starting to do too.
So like there's these little pet peeves
that I didn't have about you before
that I'm starting to find.
So you know how many pet peeves I have about you.
Okay, but like this is what you do.
You take a sip, right?
So, if we're out to dinner, you'll take a sip of your drink.
And just for some reason, you don't place it down
on the table.
It's like, it's like a, it's like a, bam, it.
And it's almost like you're mad when you put it down.
Okay, so, but you're not mad.
Let me tell you something.
But it's such an aggressive way to put the glass back down.
Do you know how many times I'm gonna say real true story?
I swear my parents, they're in heaven.
How many times you slam that cup on that table?
You do it, but I don't just,
no, but you do.
No, but you kinda, you copy off me.
But I don't ever say anything.
I don't copy off me, find your own pet peeve.
But no, but you do, but no, I'm giving you an example
that you do it too, but I don't care.
I'll see it, and I'm like, all right,
cause I'm cooler and I'm chill. No, no, no, no, that's not true. There are so many things that you do that too, but I don't care. I'll see it and I'm like, all right, cause I'm cooler and I'm chill.
No, no, no, no, that's not true.
There are so many things that you do that I'm like,
oh my God, I wanna say something,
but I don't wanna fight with you.
I rather like, I'm gonna try you.
I rather be in a good mood so I can get laid.
And that's, you know what I mean?
That all life is a thing.
Yeah, because I start fighting with you
and I argue it all the time.
You know, and then sex won't happen.
So forget it, I'll just shut up
and let you be whoever you are.
And I just want to be, I just want to have fun.
So in your relationship, don't pick the little things
because it's not worth it.
Just don't nitpick the little things.
But enjoy each other.
Enjoy each other.
It's very important.
And that's a serally nitpicking.
I'm telling you, when you put the glass down,
and it's a, no, and it's aggressive. I have to tell you Joe
You keep slamming this glass. It's a little aggressive
But listen guys, so anyway, don't nitpick because you know, it's not worth it. Just love each other be happy
Okay, but I have to tell you when things bother me because then they're gonna just build up
I believe that people should you have to communicate in life
I feel like we have a big problem not us, but like that could be a big problem even just watching these episodes of housewives
Like lately. It's like nobody knows how to communicate like it's like nobody even when I got up
Oh, I'm sure you guys also saw this episode of the real housewives of New Jersey
How frustrating was it? I mean, I I
Honestly all I did was get up and because I couldn't communicate with Jennifer
And I needed to like express
what I had to say and I hated that she was picking on you. I really did. She calls you a
little bitch boy or something. And it really pissed me off. So she was very disrespectful.
So it pissed me off and I walked aggressively at her to say listen to me and she grabbed
my hand which is like that's not cool. Like how we're not, we're not in high school.
We're not touching each other.
It's one thing to like speak back and forth.
That pissed me off.
Like that when she put her hand on me like that, it took everything in me because I know
better.
And you know, you guys were all right there in two seconds to be like, I jumped right
in there.
Bill was walking off clips.
He's like, please killer.
Please somebody killer.
He was, he was hoping somebody beat that. I jumped right in. Bill was walking off clips. He's like, please kill her. Somebody kill her.
He was hoping somebody beat that.
He was just like, oh, let me know how it goes, guys.
He was walking the other way.
But like, yeah, let me save my wife.
God forbid somebody hits her in her face.
That beautiful face.
I don't want nothing to happen to you, honey.
That's when I'm talking about when it comes to communication.
Like, how about this communication?
Forget about the show.
Let's talk about real life stuff.
So I'm building MD for Miss Melissa Gorge here, right?
So and I'm building it.
And yesterday this yesterday she pissed me off so bad
because she drives by the store and she's like, what are you doing?
Because the designers were coming there at 11 o'clock
or five o'clock in the afternoon and she's like, you're not ready.
I see a cloud of smoke in there.
And should I cancel them?
And she starts just bitching about everything.
And here we are, we're working so hard.
We got all this tingle.
She's like, the mirrors are not up.
And this is not up.
And I was just staring at her and I said,
how do you know the mirrors are not up?
Now, I'm aggravated because I'm at my other sites.
I'm working so hard.
I'm running around for her to get this done
and she tells me, like, you, what's this?
What's that?
What's that?
She's complaining about everything
and I said, how do you know the reason?
I was not complaining.
I simply said to you, guys, if you to cue you in here,
I'm sure most of you know already,
we are building a new envy.
It is coming out, Joe, right?
Oh my God.
Very nice.
Guys, gorgeous, like gorgeous, gorgeous,
gorgeous, wait till you see the new envy you are going to like lose your mind. It's insane. So
Joe, obviously, we're doing a lot of the construction together. We have, you know, I have some of his
guys. I have electricians, so you know, whatever it is, I have going on over there. I have a designer
helping me decorate, which you're gonna see how incredible it looks.
So anyway, Joe and I were just in Turks and Kicos.
We've been running around like chickens
with our head cut off, is that fair to say?
Like we are working over time.
So we're both a little crabby.
Yes, we're vacation, we went on a small vacation also, right?
Oh, we went to Turks and Kicos.
The Vegas for work.
We went to Vegas for work, Turks and K-Cos.
Leave it a mile.
And then, well, no.
And then, Florida, we had to go to because Joe had a week of comedy out there.
So we've been traveling a lot.
We're cranky.
We're building a house.
We're building envy.
It's a lot.
And plus of all the other things we have going on.
Wrestling, cheer, competition.
Building on my building.
Joe's building his building. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's,. Building on my building. Joe's building his building.
It's crazy.
It's crazy.
I don't think anyone will believe what we do from 6am to 7pm.
No one, one thing you got handed to us,
we are savages when it comes to work ethic.
We work, we grind.
You got to grind, because you know what?
But we party hard, too, when we party.
What would you work hard, play hard? That's my motto. I like to work because you know what we party hard to when we party what you work hard play hard
That's my model. I love to you know work extremely hard, but we have to we have play we play we have to enjoy
So because if you don't you're gonna burn out
Let me explain this even we were both just losing our minds trying to get things done in this house like I've been working all day
I've run to envy the other envy already today
I've been to my store today. I've been to the new house today I met you at the the new house today. I met the electrician at the house today.
I passed, you know, in Joey today, I ran to the town,
a Franklin Lakes.
I, I mean, I haven't stopped all day,
between everything else, right?
You weren't in town?
You were working, you were working all day.
You were at N.V.
I saw you at the house.
You were right, you're building.
And I just literally called him,
he runs in, he sits down just like that. you were working all day, you were at NV, I saw you at the house, you were at your buildings.
And I just literally called him, he runs in,
he sits down just now at this dining room table,
we're sitting at him.
I haven't eaten yet.
We didn't even eat dinner yet.
I have a seltzer right now in a wine glass with a lemon
because it was gonna go for the wine,
but I have so much to do tonight that I'm like,
if I drink wine, it's gonna be over.
He comes in, he's still in his dirty
Work clothes. He I plop his butt down right next to me and here we are
Doing the podcast like we're just it's pretty crazy, but thank you Joe by the way because I know you didn't even get he's got
Sunchips
He's thanks me
No, you're a diva bitch. Oh.
You are.
Why would you say it?
No, why would you make people think that that's not true?
Why, you are.
You are to me.
You never said that to me.
You are.
I'm sorry.
I don't give a shit.
I'm gonna say how it is.
You are.
You're a bitch to me.
You are sometimes.
You get into this mood.
You have never said that to me.
Hold on.
Because you aren't.
No.
When it becomes to like this work and stuff like that.
See, in a relationship... Well, I've got to work, I am here. Here's what, guys, in a relationship,
a husband and a wife should respect what they do.
It's a word that destroys everything.
Makes me so mad.
Because I would never say to you,
what are you doing?
I can't believe you.
You need to, let's cancel everything.
You don't rely on me for a lot of construction.
No, but I rely on you.
Other things, but I don't.
Yeah, and it all gets done.
So you never have to bitch. But I'm not bitching at you., but I don't get done. Yeah, and it all gets done. So you never have to bitch.
But I'm not bitching at you.
See, like I cross all my teeth and
all my eyes.
But let's why your envy's not getting done.
It's getting done.
The people when the designers showed up at five o'clock,
did they do what they had?
OK, but if I didn't call them,
was there a big dust mess like you said?
Yes, yes.
I'm holding on.
Let's let's put it in.
Hold on.
If I didn't call you, when I did to this is not cleaned and it's a guy's word
Everybody was there is not ready for the designer to walk through the door
You were like hold on no, I'll get there in a little bit with all these guys wrong
Here's the thing in a relationship in a marriage. It's called about respect now if you would have called me up
And said hey babe listen to the word guys. Hey babe, babe, I, I, I drove by envy.
And I see there's a big cloud.
Uh, is it, is it dirty?
What's going on?
We have the designers come, are we going to be ready?
Stop it.
Is it going to be ready, honey, because you're working so hard.
I know you ran back and forth seven, eight times.
You're doing so much to get envy ready.
Babe, is it ready?
Honey, it's going to be ready.
Don't worry about it. There's not a big dust cloud, honey. It's gonna be ready. Don't worry about it
There's not a big dust cloud, huh? And it's almost done
I got guys are wait wait wait wait let me finish because the delivery was so wrong
And I want to stab you if I could I was I was like you're
Cuz you cuz I'm working I'm please I'm never gonna pull them out of work again to be on the podcast
I'm working. I'm tired. I want a little respect. So in a relationship respect is everything you get respect you get I do but those little words. I right I
cannot say that at a moment we were a little stressed out. It's like if somebody's working hard
I'm sure if a mom is working hard with the kids all day and I come home and I say why didn't you go
Clean the clothes. What did you do all day? You're going to flip out because you were just fixing the kids, you know, your baby's crying, you fed the baby, you're running around
like a, and I say to you, what did you do? You understand?
Yeah, I get it. I get it. But I had to let you know that what you said was going to be done
was not complete. Did you learn, did you learn from this? That's why I want you to say,
did you learn? Did you make them, did you think you made a mistake the way You talk to me. I don't think I'm talking
But I had Antonia on speaker by the way in the car and she even said when we hung up Wow
He's he's mad. I don't even say anything to him because you and you totally freaked out because you you by the way
Are very stressed out. Yes, you are you're overworked. No. You're doing a lot of comedy on top of your real job
on top of your real life. And I think that that's crazy. You're very stressed out. Not sure what
what I want is a little respect that I'm I'll run all day for you. I'll run to the moon and back.
Right. I just want a little respect and appreciation not to tell me I can't like bitching the whole
time. Just say, babe, what's going on? I'm gonna be ready. It's like me going to envy and saying honey. This clothes all your clothes is hard
But you should shut the store down and you're gonna be like what what do you mean?
It's it's your delivery. I don't know ladies. You tell me when you I first of all if anyone has ever built a house or has
You know a redone
Home out there. I tried to redo their homes
know, a redone home out there. I tried to redo their homes.
You tell me like I know a lot of
husbands and wives, they argue over
renovations and just like projects
they're doing on the house.
I know that it could be fun, but it's also
stressful to a marriage.
How about this guy?
Okay. So like there's a subject here.
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There's a subject here with
like husbands and projects.
It's always a thing.
It's like even if you're gonna like paint the bedroom,
like I feel like it turns into a project.
Yeah, I would be mad if you tell me to paint the bedroom
like a certain color that you picked and then you came there
and you walked in and you were like,
what is that?
That's disgusting.
I can't believe I'm halfway.
I'm almost done and you're like,
I hate it.
I'm like, you picked the color. No, I hate it and you redo it and that's yeah, that's a pain in the ass
You're a husband and yeah, but I know why if we're gonna argue now if you walked in and say oh my god, babe
Oh my god. What color is that? I'm baby you picked it. Oh my god. I made a mistake. I'm so sorry
I made a mistake. I'm so sorry. I don't like it honey
Can you repay it? Yes, baby no prom, but if you come in like a like saying something that I did wrong
When it's really what you did wrong
It's a problem. Okay, so so is that your advice to the ladies out there if their husbands are working on a project for them or if they're
You know working on something how how should we tell you talk? We need to be more patient with you guys
It's not more patients. I So I'm patient with you.
I don't come home and tell you don't do shit all day.
Or you're doing it wrong.
I say, I'm trying, I always try to be respectful and nice.
You'll say, what's for dinner?
And I'm like, this is for dinner.
And you look at me like, you don't like what I said
with for dinner.
So how do you, how do you think we feel?
But I look at it and I'm like, oh, I worked all day.
I need that.
But I don't say nothing.
But I don't, you just said that.
But I don't bitch. I said, yeah, I could say my little
calm and like, but I'm not saying oh my god.
And when I'm eating, I eat it and I shut up.
What am I gonna do?
You're gonna eat it and shut up because
you're out here. You're gonna go to Wendy.
She made a taco tonight.
I don't want to eat a taco, but I'm eating it.
What you love tacos? I made the ground beef.
We cut up the cheese on the side.
We have hard and soft shells.
There is chopped up lettuce and tomato.
What is wrong with a nice little taco?
It's Tuesday.
Taco Tuesday, just please tell me what's wrong with that.
It's taco Tuesday.
It's taco Tuesday.
I'm gonna eat it, I'll just say it.
Okay, set up a bitch.
If you don't wanna eat a nice little salad on say that. Okay, set up a bitch. If you don't want to eat and a nice little salad on the side
Okay, a beautiful salad. What is wrong with that? It's taco Tuesday
Okay, I don't know ladies. I guess like that is a subject when we're talking about men and like projects and just getting
I'm sorry if I came off aggressive, but I'm very I'm very overworked
I'm exhausted. It's the real word
Yes, you're exhausted to or you wouldn't have taken it so to heart because I was like whoa I don't even say anything and you were like I will always take that to heart exhausted or not
Because I'm working hard for someone. It's like you just don't just it was wrong
And I'm glad that you admitted that you were wrong. I'm sorry if I said things a little abruptly.
I'm very, I'm very overworked.
We are Joe and I are having like a month right now.
We are stressed out.
I think a lot of it's for my extra is the building of the house and for you too.
A designing it all, picking everything out, talking to this guy, talking to that guy,
the cabinet guy, the tile guy.
No, you know what's bad with me?
That's stressful to me.
It's not stressful for me because that's what I do bad with me. That's stressful to me.
It's not stressful for me because that's what I do for a living.
What's stressful is COVID.
COVID really put a damper into my whole business and it's been hard to get materials and just
the time and the architects are working slow to overwhelmed and the engineers and getting
paperwork.
So it's been hard.
COVID really hurt the construction business.
It's delayed me a year and a half on some projects. It cost me a year and a half of carrying costs
and I'm losing a lot of money.
So that's, I'm very, very stressed with that.
So that's when your wife should pick you up
and make you feel better, not knock you down.
So that's what we do in a relationship.
When your partner is suffering with something,
you be there for them.
I agree.
Well, what about that time? I mean, Joe and I, you know,
the funny part is, you know, Joe and I are running around like
chickens with our heads cut off and we have a lot of projects going
on and, you know, I have a lot of side businesses and he's building
his buildings. There's a lot of stuff, a lot of good stuff for
I Joe. So we're grateful. We would say for that, we work really
hard and we have a lot right now that on our plates. And it's
crazy. We should appreciate all the hard work. There was a time when like, you know, we were like down and out.
What year was that?
2007, I think it was.
2007 when the market crashed.
Yes, because I had it.
The real estate market crashed.
Yep, I just had Gino.
And we were, you know, we're very lucky now that we're making money
and we're working and we're moving.
But we had a time and I wrote about this in my book
that I actually had to go to Costco
and call Joe from Costco and turn around and go home
because I literally only had $50 in my pocket.
Do you remember that, Joe?
Oh, yes, I do.
So what happened was I was building a big building.
Melissa was pregnant. I think I had just had Gino
So I just have them. I would either was pregnant or I just had you know, you we had we had in Tonya
We had in Tonya you were pregnant with Geno so Antonio was young too. Yeah, she was too. Yeah, so she's pregnant and
Daper so I think it had to be Gino like I was newborn. He was a newborn. Okay, I was building this big building that I, I, I, I,
real large.
It was my biggest project ever that I ever took on.
And I was also had like a bunch of houses, 10, 15 real estate homes
on the contract.
And all of a sudden, this is be in 2003, 4, 5, you put a house on a market
which sell it immediately.
And then all of a sudden, one day, it just said, the real estate bubble has bursted.
And all the houses I was building were sitting,
the banks pulled all the construction loans,
I was out of money.
And I go, Melissa calls me up one day,
and I'm gonna make this quick.
She calls me up, she was like, oh my God.
Oh, I just basically told them that I needed diapers.
And, you know, we were at a time where we were pretty broke.
We were building our house in Montville.
Okay, so that big house that you got.
No, we were in already.
No, we were not,
because I remember being in the rental house,
driving with you.
Okay.
So we were building, we were,
we were almost done building our big house in Montville.
So we were really just at a point where we were like,
barely making ends meet,
just trying to make it all work out.
And we moved in. We didn't finish like four or five rooms.
Right. Right. And we, you know, I had just had, you know, I called him and I said, you know what, Joe, I need diapers.
Like, I don't know what to do. So he was like, and I had no money, you know, she had no money.
She had no money. She had the credit cards. We had the credit cards max at the time.
We had all of her credit card. Max, she used to have some and whatever she wanted on a card.
Then I put a stop that I gave her $100 a week. I said, I get you gas. We had the credit cards max at the time. We had all of the credit card max. She used to have, so whatever she wanted on the card,
then I put a stop that I gave her $100 a week.
I said, I get you gas, I get your pamper,
I get some food.
She was like, what?
I said, yes.
And I, and she did it.
She did was, you know, we had no choice.
And then, and then, and so he picks me up
and he's driving me to Costco and true story.
She calls me up, I need, I need, I need pamper.
And I'm like, oh my god, I got 75 dollars in my pocket. And I
I'm building this large building and I didn't even have any more money. I
had no avenues to get money. It was so bad. So I we I come pick her up, get the
kids in the car, we drive right to Costco, big department store that sells
we went there because you get you get these Pampers for like 40 bucks, a big pack.
So we pull up I wait for our size, she runs in, she gets the
pamper's and something else.
Something I said, don't spend more than 60 bucks or 50 bucks or whatever.
She goes inside and she comes up to the register and we have like a membership.
Yeah.
So you have to have like a Costco membership.
And when I go up to pay for the diapers, I only had 50 bucks in my hand.
And they said your membership fee is expired.
And it was $50 to renew the membership fee for Costco membership.
So they were like, you know, you're expired.
So I called Joe and I'm like, Joe, I need another 50 because we're expired.
And he's like, forget it.
Come back out.
Like literally couldn't give me another $50 bill
and we went to like CVS and just picked up like a small thing
of diapers until we figured it out like the next day
or whatever it was.
And that literally was a time where, you know,
I feel like we learned a lot about each other.
That was us showing our, like we're hustlers
and we hustled out of that.
We worked our way out of it.
But that was definitely, definitely like a rough time for us.
And there you go.
That's a time when husbands and wives
need to like group together and really like see eye to eye
and make it work in like the worst time ever.
Yeah, yeah.
And listen, you showed me your true colors.
I was true love at the
time. You really you really were an amazing wife because you know you could
have flipped out on me and said what do you know I don't want to live this way?
Who knows? I couldn't control it but we really we came together and we did
what we had to do. We've come a long way. We went from not being able to buy
diapers and they were doing pretty good. Yeah. Right? But it's like it was a work.
It was work.
It was work.
We worked with our two hands and came out of it.
And here we are.
So that was just a quick little story.
I don't know how we got off on that tangent.
But that was a quick little story to explain that, like,
you know, there's tough times.
And if anyone is going through tough times out there
and you're at the point that Joe and I were at in 2007,
believe me, there's light at the end of the tunnel.
You can work your way out of it, right?
Because it doesn't always have to stay that way.
We didn't know how we were gonna get out of it.
We didn't know what we were gonna do
and we figured it out, so.
But what we did do, no matter how hard it was,
we always partied, not partied, but we went out.
And we couldn't afford maybe the big expensive dinners, but we went to like date night, right?
And we went to like a chain and we would eat at a small chain and and and come home and watch a movie.
Well, our favorite chain usually is outback.
Yeah, but no matter what we did, we still went out and and we spent time together.
Right?
Yeah, we always party.
You have to.
Yeah, we always do.
You have to.
You have to.
We always do.
So, and you know, let's not forget that good company doesn't cost the thing.
Got it?
Yeah, that was a good one back.
Yeah, yeah.
I liked that.
Good company costs nothing, guys.
And that's really the most important thing that you want to take from this, right?
Yeah, so, and we also take from this podcast that, you know, a apology is everything.
And it meant so much to me.
And I just want to bring that up again.
And it was amazing.
Well, I can't guarantee that I'm not going to be like frustrated and overworked and start
screaming at you because it happens and that's just life.
Well, now you're at an age.
And we're building a house and we're building envy and we're building all these things.
So I'm exhausted.
But now you're at an age that you should know it this it should know okay I'm not I should
enact that. Are you belittling me? No. That we are that we are also at an age that you shouldn't
like talk about poop and stuff or whatever you were just talking about. Well I didn't say you had a poop
and you're like oh my god. He's a brown thing. He's all not reading on it. Oh my god. What I said
was she probably had a brown state. I had to check her underwear if she had a brown thing. Oh my God. What I said was she probably had a brown say I had to check her underwear if she had a brown
statement.
I don't want to hear you talk about how bad it was.
You shit.
You bet.
Oh my God.
Lord help me.
All right.
So listen guys, today I asked everyone on Instagram.
I wanted to know what you wanted to hear Joe and I talk about on the podcast, sorry,
and let me look right now.
I'm going to take some of your questions that you guys wanted to know, okay?
Some people said mom guilt, how do you get over it when you have date nights?
I have young ones and she has obviously, well, mom guilt when it comes to date nights,
I don't think you should have guys.
I'm going to talk you out of that one right now.
Unless you're having a date night, three, four nights a week,
you should not have any mom guilt for a date night
because the date night with your hubby
is gonna make you a better mom, I promise.
Okay, or else you're gonna pull your hair out of your head.
So I choose to let you guys know,
there should be zero mom guilt. I get plenty of mom guilt for
You know missing events for when I'm at my events and working and my child is at a cheer comp or wrestling
There's my mom guilt
But I do not have mom guilt for going out on a date night with Joe and
Like leaving the kids at home with a babysitter. So you should not either,
and that is my advice to you on that.
Definitely should be once a week,
and you shouldn't feel guilty about that.
Unless you're doing it like three, four times a week,
you're leaving your kids home.
All right, but once you're twice a week having a date night,
totally acceptable, there should be zero mom guilt for that.
The thing I do know is when you have toddlers
and little ones though, I know especially the little girls,
I remember Antonia when she was little, She's like, take me mommy. Why are you leaving with I want to go to dinner too
And I give you this guilt trip, but trust me they get over that screw that guilt trip
You know what you need to you need to be with your hubby or else you're gonna pull your hair out the next day
You guys have to have some adult time. So don't have mom guilt
Screwed-out guilt trick is when they turn 16, they leave. They don't want to
even be with you. They're gone all the time. A lot of people are talking about
having teens and how and how hard it is. And it is hard, guys. It is. I don't
know. I mean, I know I talked a little bit about Antonia dating. I'm in the
last podcast with Joe, right? Yeah. Um rough, it's rough, because their personalities
are getting rough, their attitudes are on a different level.
They have strong opinions.
It's very hard for me to give complete advice for teens,
because I would say it varies between like boys and girls,
and just every kid is different.
But I think I have to be patient with them.
I do let a lot that they say.
I really pick and choose my battles, because I feel. I do let a lot that they say.
I really pick and choose my battles
because I feel like I could yell at them all day long.
So I...
And that's where she does yell a little too much.
And I say, listen, slow down.
You can't yell at everything
because they're not gonna take you serious.
I pick what to yell at.
Like sometimes you'll say in front of me,
yo, you're not gonna yell at them. And I sit down like, you know, okay, guys, what are you doing?
And I don't want to always be the parent that she yelling because I want them to also respect
when I do yell at them because a mom is bitching at the kids all the time because she's trying
to be a mom.
Oh, I really like this person. You know what?
So pick and choose how to what you're gonna yell at
and discipline a mom.
Hey everyone, this is Heather DeBrow
and do I have some exciting news for you?
We are launching a variety of new episodes
that are gonna have amazing special guests,
some of my close friends and so much more.
It's gonna be really fun. And we're gonna get to hear from fans, to have amazing special guests, some of my close friends and so much more.
It's going to be really fun.
And we're going to get to hear from fans, new friends and get an inside look of my world.
We're really excited for you to listen and join in for heavy
duro's world on podcast fun episodes drop on Thursdays and Fridays,
tune in on Spotify, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Okay, ready, Joe? They want to know what Joe noticed about you that was so
different compared to all of his other girls that he dated. I just
just another fun fact about Joe Gorgon case anyone does he know.
Such a loser. Joe was engaged.
Such a loser. No, your host.
Joe was engaged.
Oh my God.
Twice before me.
Like, what are you, just a lover boy?
No, I get it.
That wants to get married.
Can't help that women threw themselves at me. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Bill, my fork, she didn't pitch at me. I don't know, you know. Now you didn't have a building back then.
So just, we don't have to talk about any specific humans.
Oh, right.
Just what, what this person said, what is Joe notice about you
compared to all the other girls he's dated?
Like, why was I different for you?
Was I different or you were just like,
Hey, time to put for you to marry.
No, no, no, it was not that.
Actually, when I met Melissa, I was kind of over.
I was enjoying myself.
I didn't want to be with a girl.
Yeah, I just wanted to have a great time.
And she came out of nowhere.
And I don't know, man, it was just like really
love that first sight.
And I fell in love with her.
And a minute I saw her, I was extremely attracted to her.
And then when I met her, I was so impressed with her
because she was so put together.
I mean, she was working through jobs.
She was putting herself to college.
And she was just reminded me of me.
Like, she was a hustler, but she knew about family value.
She loved family value.
Everything I said, she agreed on.
Like I said, all right, well, I will love to get you know
Let's get mad. I want kids. I want kids. I want whatever you know, I went dinner on the table. Yeah, I love to make dinner
You know everything she was just it just we clicked and it worked and it was just it was just meant to be I guess
True love it was awesome. It really was and that's what made it like I'm gonna be honest you my my exes I
When I was engaged or whatever
True story I was back at that back then I was a landscaper so I was
With this please don't tell me about how everybody bent over when you when you were a landscaper in their robes and showed you their
Reginas we're not talking about that. We're talking about that next episode, but I was a landscaper.
I thought you were a landscaper.
No, no, I was a landscaper.
So I had so many doubts when I was engaged.
When I was engaged the first time,
I had so many doubts.
So one of my customers is a 75 year old man,
very successful man, I would sit there
and I said, listen, I'm about to get married,
but I just, I don't know, and I kept on,
I don't know about this, I don't know about that. And you know what the man said to me he goes let me tell you something son
You have a lot of doubts and when you have a doubt get out and that's stuck with me forever
You did have a lot of doubts had a lot of doubts
Just a lot of little doubts that with when I met you
There wasn't one doubt not one which was pretty amazing
I just want to be be me every single day.
Yeah, but it was just, you know, like if I had so many doubts,
you know what happens?
People are so insecure that they think they have to get married,
that they have so many doubts about that person,
and then they go through with it and they get married,
and then they get divorced,
because those doubts became big problems in their life.
You cannot have doubts.
Stay single, don't get married.
You'll find that true love.
Yeah, I say wait, listen, I do say that
for anyone out there who is dating someone
and they're in a serious relationship
or you've moved in together
and you think you're engaged
or you're about to get engaged
and you do have doubts.
I honestly have to say, I believe in that.
Like there is no rush. Give it one more year. One year is not going to change your life, I believe in that. Like, there is no rush.
Give it one more year.
One year is not going to change your life.
I always say that.
You have to, if you're having doubts,
there's always going to be a couple doubts show.
There's never going to be just absolutely no doubt.
Why do I doubt about me?
Um, be honest, like when you met me, what?
I mean, you were a little more Italian than I wanted,
to be honest. Like, I always said like, I'm not.
Yeah, but that wasn't a doubt.
That was a doubt.
That was a begin.
That was a begin.
That was a begin.
I can't believe I'm doing it, but no, I didn't have a doubt.
That was in the beginning when you met me, like,
all right, he's real Italian.
Yeah, like when I, I didn't know if I wanted to date you.
We're not because you were so Italian.
Let's talk about when you dated me, when you first dated.
I'm sick of it.
I'm sick of it.
I'm sick of it.
Yeah, you love the pasta, the Italian sauce.
I was pasta, the pasta vazuli Italian sauce. I want pasta vazuli.
Can I eat?
She wants the Italian sauce to try and have a hair roll.
Give her one with the people.
No, no, no, no, nothing to do with it.
I didn't want like, one of the people.
For the record people when I gave her the Salzee,
she didn't know what to do with it.
She was like, mom, mommy, Annie even got a big one.
She was so excited. She had to call her sisters and tell them, Mom, mommy, Annie even got a big one. She was so excited.
She had a call, her sisters and tell them, wow, he's pretty amazing. I want to get through
because we have a lot of time left. She called and she called them and she said, oh my god,
and he's blessed down there. I can't believe it. Hallelujah. No, my God. So wait, to do it
and answer it. So when we, when we, when I took out your first date, right, did you have
any doubts after that? Like not a first date. Yes, first date, right, did you have any doubts after that?
Like not a first date.
Yes, first day and on.
Did you have any doubts?
Um, no, I would say like from when I, why do you even think about it?
Because I'll tell you why I'll tell you why I think that because the very first day,
I'm not going to say what you said, but you did say something a little silly to me.
That made me go a little like, hmm, this is why I don't going to say what you said. But you did say something a little silly to me that made me go a little like
This is why I don't want to date an Italian. You said who but you came right back
All right, but you shouldn't have said that to me. That was a little weird, right?
Does it mean you're just staring at me because I'm just calling you out. I don't give a shit
Human listen human say that listen. I am a human and humans make mistakes No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, made him a stage. But it seemed like you were so in to me. And here's why I did it. I'm gonna tell you why I did it. I'm gonna tell you why.
Because I was cocky.
I was successful.
And it was that.
You were 28 year old cocky guy.
That's why I didn't want a cocky 28 year old.
It was, and it wasn't right to say.
So you want to know what I said.
I sat on a couch right after I made her dinner.
I made her a beautiful dinner.
And I said, and I had all this artist work on my walls.
I lived alone in a nice house.
And I said, I'm gonna paint you on my walls.
And she was like, really?
Yeah.
No, but you were.
Yeah, you did that.
She got so into that, right?
She fell for the for the little line you did.
And I said, when we're done,
I said, one go sit on a couch.
Now when we sat in a couch, we were talking,
I put the fireplace on and put my arm around there
and I gave a little hug.
Who says this? Oh my God, I feel like everyone's gonna be in shock. This is rude. This is so rude
I'm gonna admit something along the lines of like you put your arm around me. You're like oh
You're a little
Bicker than I thought you were or or something to that
Or like you were thicker your 15 20 pounds heavier than what no I was
maybe eight pounds I had college weight on she was drinking college was probably eight
maybe barely 10 I wish we still had your jeans from back then you put them on you're probably
like double assigned no they're they're they're actually I would say two sizes bigger
but you're a little bigger so it doesn matter. It doesn't matter what you were or what.
Which is which I didn't mean nothing
because I was in love with.
I would be because people, like, you're crazy.
I was in crazy about you.
It didn't matter.
I just maybe at the moment the way I felt you
and when I put my arm around me,
I'm like, wow, you're a little thicker than I expected.
But what guy says that?
How did I ever come back?
I literally went home and said to my sister,
I don't know, he's so sweet.
There's something so nice about him and charming.
And we had a good time.
And he fake made me dinner.
He poured it out of you fake made me dinner.
Maybe 10 you made me dinner.
And I was like, there's something so charming about him.
I'm like, believe he said this to me. I'm like, who says that? That scares you going for it.
Because you're like, it's a little bit of like a control. What is that?
But that was like I said, I was that was 22 years.
You may be now, you're sorry. And I am so wrong.
Well, listen, that was 22 years ago. I was, I was, you know, that Italian cocky thing, which I hate.
I don't like, but when around her,
I kind of put my guard down a little bit,
but in the beginning, I guess I had to like say,
you know, I'm the man, I guess, I don't know.
Was it wrong? 100% and I apologize.
I apologize, but I wish I want you back like that.
I do. I want you, I want you bigger. You're too
skinny now. Oh great. I want you back to you. I'm not believe it. I did. So, but whatever.
You have to another question because we have time for one more and there's so many here.
Like I can we can literally talk all day. How do you increase your sex life with your spouse
when you have young kids? And they're like nine years old, 10 years old,
and you've been married for nine years.
So it's tough.
And they said they have kids,
they've been married for nine years.
Like, so, at that point,
how do you not make it like a routine?
Because it does become a routine
and people just give up on it, right?
I feel like a lot of people we know even just get like,
oh, the kids, we're gonna come in the room and, you know, it's like the same thing. Like
after a while, you get into a routine. It's like, oh, it's Saturday night. We're going
to have sexual relations. You know, I don't, that's why I don't think it should be like
a routine. It should be spontaneous. And anywhere you could sneak away, you know, we have
some kids out there. Anywhere you can sneak away, you runner, we have some kids up there, anywhere you could sneak away, you run,
like, let's say they're upstairs,
you run down in the basement real quick.
I listen, I've done it where,
and I'm gonna be honest, we would be in some,
let me see.
We would be in some one partner has to be that way.
Yeah, we were in a kitchen one time, right?
We're just, we're,
Oh, you're gonna have a personal story over here.
I am, I am.
I don't really know if I'm not into it.
Why are you whispering?
Because I don't want my kids here. We were in a kitchen with
time right in the kitchen. Our kids are literally they were
younger so they were like let's say they were like 7-8-9 right
around there like a net and that range and they're all
watching TV in the family room and we could see them and the
families are very close. No 7-8-9 is old. They were 2-3 and 4.
Whatever they were. They were 5-6. They were 2-3 and 4. They were not 7-8 or 9.
Not 8-2. Joey's from up to and four. They were not seven eight or nine. Not eight were two.
Joey said,
They were absolutely,
No, it was not two years ago.
Maybe, all right.
So definitely two, three or four.
They were watching,
they were watching Dora,
it's one five five five.
Even if they were 15, 16, 17,
17, doesn't matter,
I would do the same thing.
So we were just sitting there,
she's cooking,
I get right behind her
and the kids are over there
and literally I'm robbing her guys.
I'm gonna get a little graphic with this
because you know what?
You should, this is what keeps a marriage together,
the little spice right grab her.
And I get behind her and I, you know, and I slide it.
And you know, and right in the kitchen,
as I'm watching, as I'm watching our children,
just watching Nemo or whatever they were doing,
they're not seeing anything because we're behind, but you know, it just happened.
And it was cool and it was sexual and it was hot for that little
moment. Listen, maybe, maybe my wife, let's say, didn't enjoy it that much because
she was like, my God, they're kids, the kids, kids.
But when, when it was over, when she goes to sleep at night and she thinks about it,
or she, when I leave for work, the next day the next day she's like wow he took me like just like that movie 50 shades of gray.
Oh here we go. I'm obsessed with 50 shades of gray guys it's so hot.
And that's what we do all the time. Every little moment I get in we get it in and it's sexual
and you keep it different and and I always look at her like I stuck to myself. Listen, I say to my head that you are, oh my God,
she's amazing, she's this, she's great.
And I-
So are you saying that we need to be spontaneous?
That's what makes me-
Spontaneous and it's all in your mind too.
If you think about it and say, oh my God,
we've been married 14 years.
And oh my God, it's Tuesday night.
Why we haven't, it's Tuesday night.
Or why we haven't had a Thursday.
And if you, your mind is everything. You have to tell your mind, it's Tuesday night. Why we haven't it's Tuesday night or why we haven't had a Thursday and if you your mind is everything you have to tell your mind. It's amazing.
All right. So you're saying you're saying you need to be spontaneous. That's that's going to help
because they're asking for advice after nine years. And I would say that too. I would say you can't
be in the routine. You can't say like, Oh, it's been five days today Saturday night. Let's like spontaneous.
Sometimes I would try to, when they're least expecting it
possibly, maybe one time you're coming out of the shower,
maybe the kids aren't around.
Maybe you guys got home late.
Like when it's spontaneous, I would say that's going
to be my advice to someone who has a lot of kids married
for nine years, wants to keep it.
Do something spontaneous. So at least try to keep it, do something spontaneous.
So at least try it once a week, something spontaneous.
I think that would be-
And a mindset.
You mind his everything.
Just spontaneous, hold on.
Look, little Joey's walking by.
Joey, come say hi.
Joey, come here.
Say hi.
Come here.
Hurry up.
I just want you to say hi, guys.
Mind psych guys.
Just say hi, everybody.
They can't see you.
Just say hi.
Hi.
That's it. That's all you got I just got phrases wow it's so different but
listen it's remember this guys it's a mindset your mind is everything it's so
powerful I can tell I could my mind could say I could think Melissa I hate her I
hate her today and I could say she is she I'm not even attracted to her anymore
and I if I tell my mind it's gonna
Joe is saying it's mine over matter
So you have to tell your mind when you're looking at your spouse that you've been looking at for the last 10 years sitting on that couch across from
You and you guys are watching that show and they're probably an oversized sweatpants oversized sweatpants and you know a big baggy sweatshirt
You need and their hair is up like in a messy bun, or vice versa with the guy, okay?
You need to look at them and be like,
hmm, your mind needs to tell you that you're into them,
that they're good looking.
You remind yourself of something.
Is that what you're saying?
No, no, your mind is, your mind is your most powerful tool.
If you say to them and say, like,
oh my God, I've been married 18 years,
I've been married 10 years, and we have kids,
and it's the same thing.
That's what you're telling yourself it is.
Tell yourself that we've been married 10 years,
and I can't wait to be with this man or this woman again,
because we've been together 10 years.
That is so special today.
You've been together 15 years, 12 years, six years.
That is special.
People cannot even be together for a year.
Okay, all right, so-
That's sad.
All right, got it.
So what you're basically saying is,
well, what we're both kind of saying is,
be spontaneous, try different positions,
different locations, different times of the day,
just try different.
That is my advice to married couples- Different, yeah couples that I've been married for a very long time
There you go. I love it. I love it. I love it. So that's our marriage advice for today guys
We are gonna wrap this up by just telling you guys that we appreciate the love we read all of your DMs all of your comments
We love how much you guys love on display and that you love hearing our banter or whatever
it is we do. I don't know. I think we're just honest with each other. And the truth is,
we don't get mad at each other, right? So we can be honest, right? Joe, we tell each other
on a team how we feel and like we're not going to be mad at each other.
You know, that is community communication is everything. And we don't communicate a lot.
We really don't hold a grudge, maybe. Gr grudges suck don't hold them. I used to hold grudges. I was a grudge hold
I know more but now you know this podcast made me very horny. Oh my god stop. It is he's being dramatic guys.
Anyway, we are so happy. We're reading everything you say. We love that you guys love the show.
We will be back very soon together, but just keep sending me the conversations
that you want us to have,
because I love talking marriage with you guys.
I love having Joe's little manly advice on our show.
Keep staying, stay tuned to the Real Housewives of New Jersey,
because it just keeps getting better and crazier by the minute.
So make sure you guys keep watching that.
And make sure you guys head over to envybymg.com.
We're gonna see very soon this new story.
You're gonna be so excited guys.
Wait till you see it, it's incredible.
So we love you, Joe.
Thank you so much for being a guest today
on the show and giving us all of your incredible
Italian man advice.
Why are you done?
No, how about me?
How about my comedy shows?
You just talked about envy. You just talked about comedy? Yeah, how about me? How about how about how about my comedy shows? You just
talked about envy. Oh, you just talk about comedy. Yeah. Okay, but we got we got we got Nashville's next
guys. So Joe will be in Nashville. I don't know where everybody is out there in Nashville, but
Nashville and Orlando are next and you can go to the real joe gorgah.com. If you want to come to see
any of those, those are going to be so great. Boston's coming up.
Boston too.
I know immediately it's Nashville and Orlando.
So definitely if you're in those areas, check out the real joe gorgga.com and get tickets.
We're always there in the audience, sharing them on.
And it's just, it's really such a fun night.
It's a fun night out.
It's fun.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You're a funny guy, bro.
You're a funny guy. No, you're a funny. You're funny yeah you're funny all right guys love you
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