On Purpose with Jay Shetty - 7 Ways Break Ups Don’t Have To Break You & Building Your Confidence Back

Episode Date: January 31, 2020

Have you ever had a broken heart? Jay Shetty knows recovering from a break up is painful. After immersing yourself into a relationship, it can be hard to recover. The feelings of hurt and loneliness can feel like a loss that needs to be grieved. What if you could transform your relationship with your break up and turn it into an opportunity for growth instead of devastation? Watch this video to learn Jay Shetty’s 7 ways your break up doesn’t have to break you. Text Jay Shetty 310-997-4177See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

What do a flirtatious gambling double agent in World War II? An opera singer who burned down an honorary to kidnap her lover, and a pirate queen who walked free with all of her spoils, haven't comment. They're all real women who were left out of your history books. You can hear these stories and more on the Womanica podcast. Check it out on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen. Hi, I'm Brendan Francis Nuneum, I'm a journalist, a wanderer, and a bit of a bond vivant, but mostly a human just trying to figure out what it's all about. And not lost is my new

podcast about all those things. It's a travel show where each week I go with a friend to a new place and to really understand it, I try to get invited to a local's house for dinner. Where kind of trying to get invited to a dinner party, it doesn't always work out. Ooh, I have to get back to you. Listen to not lost on the iHeart radio app or wherever you get your podcasts. The world of chocolate has been turned upside down. A very unusual situation. You saw the stacks of cash in our office.

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And I'm coming along. Okay, that was a very large crack it up. Listen to the obsessions of wild chocolate. On the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast. For then, it was never as significant. It was never as important. It was never as deep for them. And so, you can allow yourself to recognize

that they can't break you because they never had you. Hey everyone, welcome back to On Purpose. I am so grateful that we're creating a conscious community of change makers. Each and every single one of you in 2020 are change makers in your own lives and the lives of others. And I'm so deeply grateful that we get to spend this time together every single week, whether you're walking your dog, whether you're cooking, whether you're driving, whether you're commuting, whether you're at the gym, whatever you're up to, I'm so glad that we get to spend

this meaningful time together. And this year I'm super excited because it is the year that my first ever book comes out. Like this is huge for me. Like I can't express to you how excited I am. I've never been more excited about anything I've ever done, whether that's been making videos or launching the podcast. This is truly my offering, my service, a gift that I really hope that you're going to get to read

and listen to because there'll be an audiobook as well. So if you're listening right now and you're thinking, Jay, I'd love to get that first ever book of yours. Then head over to thinklikeamunkbook.com. That's thinklikeamunkbook.com. The book is called thinklikeamunk, obviously. And it's a book which will share with you the insights to train your mind for peace and purpose every day. There's exercises, there's activities. And what I've done is taken each and every lesson that I learn living as a monk. And I've used all the behavioral science to show you how it's real and validated and

then giving you the practical steps and tips and tricks to actually make it real in your life. Now just imagine you could think like a monk, how amazing would your life be? And you could think like a monk, but live like you, right? That's the beauty of it. You can think like a monk, but live like you. And that's the access I want to give to each and every single one of you. If you've been loving the thoughts, the ideas,

the transformation from listening to my podcast. I guarantee you the book is going to take you to a deeper, another level. So head over to thinklikeamoncbook.com and you can order the book from all across the world. I can't, can't wait for you to read it. If you have loved the podcast, you will absolutely love the book. So please don't miss out on it. But today's podcast, this is a podcast that I want you to listen to. You'll probably listen to it

twice. You might even listen to it three times. And this is one of those podcasts that I want you to send to your friend that is struggling to get over a breakup, send it to your friend that's struggling to get over a heartbreak. Send it to your friend that just got broken up with or was just cheated on. Send it to your friend that is going through pain because they're not just getting the reciprocation of the love that they really, really want. Send this to a friend that is going through any sort of personal challenge when it comes to heart emotions linked to someone else. This is one of those podcasts,

and I know you're thinking, Jay, I've been sending and sharing a lot of these podcasts, but this is definitely one of those that you'd want to do it with. And the reason why I wanted to talk about this theme today and bring it up with all of you and raise it is because I've been getting so many messages, right? Like literally so many messages

from each and every single one of you talking about. Just saying, I'm like, Jay, I'm just, you know, going through a breakup, he or she left me. I don't know what to do. I feel so lost, I feel so stuck, I feel so hurt. I was overdependent. I was completely immersed in that relationship that I lost myself in that relationship.

How many of you can relate to some of these feelings of like you just completely lost yourself in another world, in another life that, after a breakup, you end up feeling stuck, you end up feeling hurt, you end up feeling hurt, you end up feeling at your lowest and your worst. Breakups can be those moments in our lives. Breakups can actually be probably one of the hardest emotions that we go through.

And sometimes that emotion can even be compared to that of loss. Right? When someone actually dies, we experience loss and sometimes breakups are so painful that they too can feel like a loss because you'd become so close with that person, chemically, physically, spiritually, mentally, emotionally. And to the degree that you connected with them through all of those touch points, to that degree it becomes harder to disconnect. For example, if you're physically connected to someone, it may be easier to move on from them.

But if you are physically and you are mentally connected to someone, then it may be a little harder to disconnect. And if you were physically and mentally and emotionally committed to that person, then it takes a little bit longer. And if you were physically, if you were mentally, and if you were emotionally, and you were spiritually connected to that person,

then it takes the longest time. So I really want you to think about that before we dive in to these methods and techniques and practices that I really want you to try and embody, these mindsets that can truly help you transform your relationship with breakup and recognize that a breakup doesn't have to break you. I just want you to know that off the bat, your breakup does't have to break you. I just want you to know that off the bat,

your breakup does not have to break you. Heartbreak doesn't have to break you. And actually it can't, but it doesn't have to. You don't have to feel that. I want you to know that your breakup does not break you. Heartbreak does not break you. I want you to remember that, I want you to write it down,

and I want you to repeat that to yourself because I want you to be so aware of that. This is. I want you to remember that, I want you to write it down, and I want you to repeat that to yourself because I want you to be so aware of that. This is what I want you to recognize that whatever breakup you're going through, your friends going through, write down this first of all, how many levels were you connected at? So we got physical,

got mental, we got emotional, and we got spiritual four levels of connection. And you could even add if you want to familiar, got mental, we got emotional, and we got spiritual four levels of connection. And you could even add if you want to familiar, like family, like how much were they connected to your family, how much were you connected to them, their family. I wanted to write out of the five modes of connection, how many were you connected them to? Right, how many of those out of the five

were you connected to that individual? And I want you to write down how many you think they were connected to you as well. Like for them, and this is something really important to think about, for them was it just a physical connection? For you, it may have been a physical mental and emotional, but for them was it just a physical connection? Right? For them was it just a mental connection? For them was it just an emotional connection? Recognize, and often people get confused, they're like, For them was it just a mental connection for them was it just an emotional connection?

Recognize and often people get confused. They're like how is it that he or she is already in another relationship after one week After one month, right? We've all heard that before where we find out from Instagram We find out from a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend whose friend told us that that person was out seen on a date in the You know the most senior place and they get caught on this date and then you hear about it. And you're going, what? I'm still trying to get over it. I'm still trying to move on. I'm still working through that. Right? I'm still pushing through all this. How is it that they've moved on to think about it this way? Maybe they've moved on because for them, it was simply physical. It was simply mental. It wasn't emotional or spiritual or familiar. But for you,

what was it for you? Recognize that difference because when you recognize that difference, it's not that it feels better, but it's that you're not going to let the fact that that person has moved on, break you because you realize for them, it was never as significant. It was never as important. It was never as deep for them. And so you can allow yourself to recognize that they can't break you because they never had you. Right, they can't break you because they never had you.

They can't break you because they never even knew you. They can't break you because they're not holding you. They never held you to break you because for them it was such an insignificant thing. So what I'm gonna share with you in this podcast is the seven ways break up doesn't have to break you. Seven ways break ups don't have to break you, right? Seven ways breakups don't have to break you. And we're gonna start with number one.

Now, a lot of advice in this space will be like, don't dwell on it, don't dwell on it, don't think about it, don't spend time thinking about it. Now, I'm not gonna tell you to do that because I already know that you're going to dwell on it. I already know you're going to think about it. But let me tell you how I want you to think about it. Right? So if I just said to you, I was like, don't think about your breakup. What's the first thing that comes into your mind? Your breakup, right? It's one of those don't think about pink elephants things. If I say

I don't think about pink elephants, the first thing that comes into your mind is pink elephants. So when I say to you, don't think about your breakup, don't think about the situation, you're going to think about the situation. So I already know you're going to think about the situation. But let me tell you how to think about it. Hey, it's Debbie Brown. And my podcast, Deeply Well, is a soft place to land on your wellness journey. I hold conscious conversations with leaders and radical healers and wellness and mental health around topics that are meant to expand and support you on your journey.

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app, Apple podcasts or whatever you get your podcasts. I mean, this is what it really means to think like a monk. It's you recognize that you're going to have a thought. So then how can I change how I have this thought, right? So this is how I want you to think about it. I want you to write down, and you can write this down, or you can voice note it to yourself. That is up to you, whether you prefer speaking,

or whether you prefer writing, this is your choice, right? It's not my choices, whichever one you prefer. Some people like to voice note, and listen back to it. Some people like to write it down. Either way, you have to get it out of your choice, right? It's not my choices, whichever one you prefer. Some people like to voice note and listen back to it. Some people like to write it down. Either way, you have to get it out of your mind, out of your head and onto a page or onto your phone. You need to make a record of this. You need to make it feel objective where you're listening to some feelings or you're reading some feelings because then you realize that you are not your feelings, right? You're not your emotions when you separate them from yourselves. You are not your feelings, you're not your emotions, you have to separate yourself from them.

So write down everything that went wrong. It could be moments, it could be events, it could be places they treated you badly, right? Because it's so unusual that when you break up, your mind tries to remind you of all the good times. How many times have you experienced that? That when you finally break up with someone, whether they break up with you or you break up with them, your mind's like, oh, but it could have been this.

But it was so beautiful. Oh, but I remember when we went out there, like all of a sudden, all these positive memories come back, right? But we forget all the negative situations. It's so important to clearly write down what went wrong. Could be events. Could be a moment. Could be an interaction. Could be the way they treated you. And then right next next to that who is who is responsible for that at the heart of that? Now, if you're feeling really weak now, you might actually think who is responsible for that, at the heart of that?

Now, if you're feeling really weak now, you might actually think it's all your fault, but I really want you to think about this. When you write down a list of everything that went wrong in the relationship, I want you to really think about who's responsible for it, who took that action, right? Who said those things that shouldn't have been said,

who did the things that shouldn't be done in a relationship? And fair enough, some of them will be you. And that's great because you're taking responsibility and ownership for them, and now you can improve and grow. But it also helps you reflect and become aware of the mistakes that someone else made. You know, the more you understand that,

the more you realize that, the easier it becomes for you to recognize what you were able to grow through and go through and the stuff that you actually dealt with because often when we break up our mind forgets a lot of the negative elements and it remembers the positive ones. Now, why is this you might be saying, You might say, how does that make sense? Well, Ticknot Han describes this in other places too, but it's described as familiar pain. We'd rather have familiar pain in our life than unfamiliar pain. So familiar pain is like, I'm with this person. They cause me pain, but it's the kind of pain I know. I know they're going to be rude to me in the morning. I know they're going to forget my birthday. I know that they're

not going to turn up to dinner on time. I know that they're not going to call me or message me because even though I'd like it, like you know what they're going to get wrong and we rather sign up to that. Then sign up to the fact that now we don't have this person and now we're in this no man's or no woman's land and we don't know where we're going Right, we'd rather sign up for familiar pain than unfamiliar pain and unfamiliar pain is we just broke up I'm a new territory. I'm single again. I don't know what's going on I don't know how they feel. I don't know how I feel. I don't know how to move on Familiar pain is like I know exactly what they're gonna mess up on and even though I don't like it, at least I know it. And we often choose knowing for goodness. We'd rather

know what's going to happen. Then be treated with respect and worth. We literally give up being given what we deserve because we'd rather know that we're getting what we don't deserve, right? We'd rather live in a world where we get what we don't deserve, but we know that we're going to get it. And that sounds really messed up and twisted. But it's true, we do. We cling on to that familiar pain. So I want you to write down everything that went wrong because I want you to become fully aware. And I want you to train your mind to recognize

that this breakup was for your good. Write you dodged a bullet. You were saved because if this person doesn't want to be with you, why are you going to force them to be with you? Or you've been saved. You have this moment. That's method number one. Number two, you're going to think about that person.

You're going to go on social media. And even if I tell you to unfollow them or block them, you'll unblock them and you'll find another password to get through to them. You'll use your Finster account or you'll be using one of your undercover SQL accounts or your friends accounts to spy on them, right? You'll find a way. Now, if you can't stay off stalking this person, that's the right way to do it. But you are going to think about them at least and you may even going to check out what they're up to. So I'm not going to tell you not to think about them, but I want you to write down, again, like you did with the first every event or every interaction.

I want you to write down everything that they personally didn't do right to you, right? A quality and attribute, the way they spoke to you, the way they treated you. I want you to be again, ascertaining to yourself that it was good that you broke up. You've disconnected yourself from some pain.

And this is you facing it. See, this is you getting close to what happened. It's so easy to be like, oh, let's get distracted. Let's just go out. Let's just go to Coachella this weekend. Let's just, you know, go away and travel. And there's nothing wrong with any of that. If you need to do that, that's great. But what I'm trying to say is that when you get closer to what went wrong, when you get closer to the problems, when you get closer to the mistakes, you get so much more awareness, right? You get so much more awareness on what can happen. And I don't want you to be in a position of just hoping things are going to change and hoping things are just going to disappear rather than just like, and just trying to distract yourself.

This is a much better way of trying to deal with it. It's a much better method of trying to overcome it. So when you write down every challenge, every mistake, everything that person said that wasn't right, any behavior, trait that your mind is now skipping on. Again, your mind is skipping on these things because your mind would rather focus on the positives, all of a sudden. Is there anything like that that your mind is forgetting? Is there anything

like that that your mind is just ignoring and that you could actually build a better understanding with. The third principle is when we use this word broken, I started to dive into it because I love breaking down language and I really mean this any word that you used often, that you use often, look at the definition of it. Because when you read the definition of it, you might figure out that your understanding of it is untrue and therefore you're using a heavier word when you, when you're the word broken. Wow, that's a heavy word. That's like, it's a powerful word, broken. When something's broken, it needs

to be replaced. So that means if you feel you're broken, like when something's broken, it needs to be replaced. So that means if you feel you're broken, like when something's broken, it needs to be fixed or replaced, right? When something's broken, it needs to be fixed or replaced. If your car's broken, if your washing machine's broken, if your dryer's broken, if a light is broken, it needs to be fixed or replaced, which means when you're calling yourself broken, you're saying you need to be fixed or you need to be replaced.

Now, when it comes to fixing yourself, even that mindset is very much like, okay, well, I'm broke, it's I need to fix something. So, you know, it's kind of hard to even process it, but when you're doing my replacing yourself, like, and people do get to that extent, they may not use the word replace,

but they're like, oh, yeah, I don't know who I am anymore, I don't like who I am anymore. That kind of language can be really damaging. So I looked up the definition of broken. The definition of broken is having been fractured or damaged and no longer in one piece in working order. Now, the first thing we have to realize is that only what you had together may be broken,

but you are not broken. Only what you tried to build together has been broken. But you are not broken. These are two separate things. It's like if you coned a car and it broke, but you still have your own car. Right. If you bought something together and that broke, but you still have your own version of it, or you still have you. And this is the mistake we make that we get so wrapped up and immersed into someone else's identity that we think that we're the broken one. We get so wrapped up and dependent on them for who we are that we feel broken. But this is a mindset shift we have to make.

We have to realize that only what we had with them is broken. We are not broken. We have now not lost our skills. We still are the same person. Right? We still have what we had before. That doesn't just disappear. That doesn't just go away. Right? That doesn't just, you don't lose that just because of this. You don't just lose that because now you're using the language. So you've got to be really careful when you're going through a breakup of the language you choose to describe how you feel. And any word that you keep using, look at the definition and ask yourself, is that really the

emotion I'm experiencing? experiencing. Hi, I'm David Eagleman. I have a new podcast called Inner Cosmos on I Heart. I'm a neuroscientist and an author at Stanford University, and I've spent my career exploring the three-pound universe in our heads. On my new podcast, I'm going to explore the relationship between our brains and our experiences

by tackling unusual questions so we can better understand our lives and our realities. Like, does time really run in slow motion when you're in a car accident? Or, can we create new senses for humans? Or, what does dreaming have to do with the rotation of the planet? So join me weekly to uncover how your brain steers your behavior, your perception, and your reality. Listen to Intercosmos with David Eagelman on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Dr. Romani and I am back with season two of my podcast, Navigating Narcissism.

Narcissists are everywhere and their toxic behavior and words can cause serious harm to your mental health. In our first season, we heard from Eileen Charlotte who was loved by the Tinder Swindler. The worst part is that he can only be guilty for stealing the money from me, but he cannot be guilty for the mental part he did. And that's even way worse than the money he took. But I am here to help.

As a licensed psychologist and survivor of narcissistic abuse myself, I know how to identify the narcissist in your life. Each week, you will hear stories from survivors who have navigated through toxic relationships, gaslighting, love bombing, and the process of their healing from these relationships. Listen to navigating narcissism on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. In the 1680s, a feisty, opera singer burned down a nunnery

and stole away with her secret lover. In 1810, a pirate queen negotiated her cruiseway to total freedom with all their loot. During World War II, a flirtatious gambling double agent helped keep D-Day a secret from the Germans. What do these stories have in common? They're all about real women who were left out of your history books. If you're tired of missing out, check out the Womanica podcast, a daily women's history

podcast highlighting women you may not have heard of, but definitely should know about. I'm your host, Jenny Kaplan, and for me, diving into these stories is the best part of my day. I learned something new about women from around the world and leave feeling amazed, inspired, and sometimes shocked. Listen on the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. So if we look at the definition of the word hurt, which is another common thing, right? Physical pain or injury to physically injured.

And literally that's kind of what hurt stops, right? But let's say it's emotional hurt and you're like, okay, I'm feeling emotional hurt. And it's like, okay, let me, let me really define what that means. So emotional hurt definition is psychological pain, mental pain, emotional pain is an unpleasant feeling, right? And maybe you are feeling an unpleasant feeling, but using what broken is so much heavier than saying, I have an unpleasant feeling, right? I'm feeling some emotional pain that I'm going through right now. I need to work through this. It's so important. It's so, so important for us to be so mindful and conscious of the language we allow,

because the more we say, I'm broken, I feel broken. You know, this broke me. You're now programming your mind to believe that you need to be fixed or replaced. So be really mindful of your language. The fourth way that a breakup doesn't have to break you is like I said before, you can't stop thinking, but you can change your thoughts. Thoughts are like clothes. You can change them if you don't like them. And it's so important to realize your thoughts are not you. Any thoughts you're having at this time,

like, I'm not beautiful enough, I'm not strong enough, I wasn't caring enough, I'm not powerful enough, whatever it is, like all that I'm not enough, right? All of that stuff, which is bound to come up, which is natural to come up, all of those things, right? Every single one of those things, they're like clothes. If you put on a pair of clothes, I don't like how I look in this. What do you do? You change your clothes. You don't just go out and force yourself to wear that. Similarly, if you have a thought, and if you don't like

that, and that's the first question to ask you with any thought, ask yourself, do I like this thought? Is this thought useful? Do I like this thought? Is this thought useful? Right? Do I like this thought? Is this thought useful or insightful? Is this thought insightful? Right? Ask yourself that. Is this thought insightful? Is it useful? Is it insightful? Is this thought helping me move forward? Right, ask yourself that. Is this thought helping me move forward? And then ask yourself, is this thought helping me elevate or escape? Notice we have just created an acronym called Life. Do I like this thought?

Is this thought insightful? Does this thought help me move forward? And does this thought help me escape or elevate? And of course we want to thought that helps us elevate. So when we're saying things like, I'm not beautiful enough, I'm not good looking enough, I'm too ugly, whatever it is, do I do you like that thought? Of course you don't like that thought, right?

So it's like saying, okay, do I like this shirt? No, I don't like this shirt. Okay, fine, I don't like it. Is it insightful? No, it's not insightful because it's not helpful, right? It's not helpful. It's not inspiring, right? That thought, it's not inspiring. Does it help me move forward? No, it doesn't help me move forward because it's actually making me move backwards because it makes me less confidence and less focused on the good things about me. Is it make me escape or elevate? It's an escape. It's not an elevate. It's not helping me push forward.

So then let me remove that thought. Let me swap it. Similarly, we'd be like, does this fit me right? Do I like this? Just the way you ask yourself, does this fit me right? You have to ask do your thoughts fit you right? Do your thoughts fit the future you want to create? Do your thoughts fit the future that you want to create? That is the question you have to ask yourself, right? That is the question you have to ask yourself. Just like you say, like, you know, do you reckon this is going to fit me for the next three months? Do you

think it's going to fit me for the next year? Is this thought going to fit you for the next three months? Do you want to wear that thought? That's the question you have to ask yourself. Do you want to wear that thought? So remember this, you can't stop thinking but you can change your thoughts. Thoughts are like clothes, you can change them if you don't like them. Now point number five, whatever you're going through, whatever situation you're in, what's really been affected is your confidence. Your confidence is what is hurt and torn down after a breakup. Because our confidence became as strong as that relationship was.

Because we gave everything, right? We have this bad habit of making something our everything and then we put all of our confidence into a relationship. See, we make the mistake. This is actually a really big confidence lesson. We make the mistake of putting our confidence into a car. We make the mistake of putting our confidence into a relationship. We make the mistake of putting our confidence into a property.

We make the mistake of putting our confidence into a business. We make the mistake of putting our confidence into a award. When you make the mistake of putting your confidence into anything, you lose your confidence. Because you're now relying on that thing to make you feel confidence. If that thing breaks, if that thing falls apart, if that things goes wrong, your confidence is here. When actually it was your confidence that created all of that, but that wasn't your confidence. So your confidence allowed you to maybe have a nice car or live a purpose for life or surprise your friend for their birthday or whatever, your confidence allows

you to do that. But when you put your confidence into that, you lose your confidence. So stop putting your confidence into people and things. And the way we build our confidence after a breakup and the way that your breakup doesn't have to break you, other three ease, exercise, eat right and energy of people around you. When we exercise after a break up, we build our confidence, not just from looking better, but feeling better, from eating right, again, taking care of ourselves, showing ourselves,

when we eat, when you exercise in your eat right, what are you doing? You're showing yourself that you matter, you're showing yourself that you care, and you want to be around people with the right energy. And a lot of the times, it's important to spend time with your friends from before you're in that relationship, building new relationships and surrounding yourself with the energy that doesn't just

keep bringing you down and reminding you of that relationship that has just ended. Now the sixth principle is something that's been written and thought about a lot, but I loved it. I was looking at this on Wikipedia, it was Kinsugi, is the Japanese art of repairing broken pottery by mending broken pieces with dusted gold silver or platinum. So what it is, and you may have seen pictures of this on on social media where there's these parts, these beautiful parts that have been put together again through gold dust. And so you can see the lines, almost like veins in a pot. And the philosophy behind this is that it's trying to help us realize that we need to embrace our flaws

and we need to embrace them rather than hiding them. So often we're trying to hide all these mistakes, we're trying to hide all these flaws. We don't really get into it, we don't really get to use it, we don't get to understand it. Right with our flaws, we don't really get to understand them, we try and hide them, we try and put them away, whereas these pots are put together again

to show us that nothing is ever truly broken and it's more beautiful after it. This is the point of this Kinsugi as it's called, and I hope I'm saying that right, the Japanese art of repairing broken pottery, is that when something's broken, we usually throw it away, but they believe that actually if you can put it together,

it actually becomes more beautiful. And this is what we need to realize, that any scar, any wound, any pain, actually makes you more beautiful. If you pull yourself together again after it, it makes you more beautiful, it makes you more attractive, it makes you more beautiful. If you pull yourself together again after it, it makes you more beautiful. It makes you more attractive. It makes you more powerful.

It makes you more strong. So actually it doesn't break you. It actually makes you stronger. It doesn't break you. It builds you up. When you recognize that you don't want to hide these wounds, you don't want to hide these challenges. The seventh and final principles from Rumi, were he said that the wound is the place where

the light enters you. Exactly in the same way as the Japanese art of repairing pottery, the wound is actually where the light enters you. It's what allows you to become a better mohosa, more powerful, more beautiful, more incredible individual, more amazing individual. So don't forget that. The wound is the place where the light enters you as Rumi said it best. So these are the seven ways breakups don't have to break you.

And I would recommend listening to this one again, sharing it with your friends, really understanding these principles, letting them really set in, asking yourself the questions that I shared here, checking, doing those three E's, like put these into practice, try and live one of them.

You don't have to live all of them. Try and live one of them. The reason why I give you a selection and a collection is that you can choose which one works for you. And so I want you to do that. Pick one that works for you. Select one that works for you and make it happen. Thank you so much for listening to On Purpose this week.

I can't wait for you to hear my guest next week and make sure, please, it would mean the world to me. Pre-order, think like a monkbook.com, go and pre-order my book. I can't, can't, can't wait for you to read it. If you're enjoying the podcast, if this podcast has had an impact on you, it would have mean so much to me if you go and purchase the book at thinklikeamonbook.com. Thank you so much for listening to everyone. I'll see you again next week. Our 20s are often seen as this golden decade. Our time to be carefree, make mistakes and figure out our lives.

But what can psychology teach us about this time? I'm Jermis Beg, the host of the Psychology of your 20s. Each week we take a deep dive into a unique aspect of our 20s. From career anxiety, mental health, heartbreak, money, and much more to explore the science behind our experiences. The psychology of your 20s hosted by me, Gemma Speg. Listen now on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. I'm Munga Shatekler and it turns out astrology is way more widespread than any of us want to believe.

You can find it in major league baseball, international banks, K-pop groups, even the White House. But just when I thought I had a handle on this subject, something completely unbelievable happened to me. Am I whole view on astrology change. Whether you're a skeptic or a believer, give me a few minutes because I think your ideas are about to change too.

Listen to Skyline Drive on the iHeart radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Conquer your New Year's resolution to be more productive with the Before Breakfast Podcast. In each bite-sized daily episode, time management and productivity expert Laura Vandercam teaches you how to make the most of your time, both at work and at home. These are the practical suggestions you need to get more done with your day. Just as lifting weights keeps our bodies strong as we age,

learning new skills is the mental equivalent of pumping iron. strong as we age, learning new skills is the mental equivalent of pumping iron. Listen to Before Breakfast on the I Heart Radio app or wherever you get your podcasts.