Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #224
Episode Date: April 10, 2015This week on PKA, the guys have on livestreamer & cosplayer Kat Gunn join the show and they discuss her winning Ultimate Gamer, how would you survive an entire year with nothing but $500 and more deta...ils on the PKA paintball event this weekend!
Transcript
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And we're live.
Painkiller Already, episode 224.
All right.
So this episode of Painkiller Already is being brought to you by Crunchyroll.
Go to crunchyroll.com slash pka.
That is the way to do it, folks.
I'm talking about signing up for premium
and getting access to the world's finest collection of anime,
free for 30 days with zero ads.
We've watched a few different shows on there.
Our latest obsession has been RWBY, and we're going to check out another trailer from that that none of us have seen before in just
a bit. But they have, there are a lot of other featured shows that they wanted you guys to be
aware of. So there's Con Collie, The Testament of New Sister New Devil, or excuse me, The Testament
of Sister New Devil. There's Cute High Earth Defense Club Love, Military, and Saikano, How
to Raise a Boring Girlfriend.
So these things come straight from Japan.
They're available to you as soon as an hour after premiering there.
And it's all professionally subtitled.
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And all you've got to do, once again, it's crunchyroll.com.
You get signed up and started today.
We recommend Ruby.
But if you guys have any other suggestions, tweet them at us.
We'll take a look.
Kat, aren't you an expert in anime?
I actually have been watching Hunter x Hunter on Crunchyroll
as well as, it's nice having
premium because you get episodes a week early
as opposed to having to wait. So I watch
Attack on Titan and all that stuff too.
Nice. Now, have you seen How to
Raise a Boy and Girlfriend? No.
I was going to ask about it. The title has me curious. I don't know why you'd want to do such a thing.
Do you want to watch the trailer together?
Yes, I actually have it queued up. I think we're supposed to start at 23 seconds.
I'm ready. As am I.
All right. Ready. Oh, wait. I need volume. Ready, set, play. Blake, it's time. Ready as am I all right ready away any volume ready set play
You dialogue this time
Okay
Does she have cat ears or is that a bow it's a big bow okay, just just checking
So we've got some characters sprinting through a red-leafed forest.
How old is she?
It's a cartoon.
Well, she's a cartoon, so anywhere between 7 and 25.
She's a hot cartoon, and I don't know if this is an appropriate thought or not.
Probably not.
Just keep it to yourself.
No, keep going with the thought.
So there's hot cartoons sliding down a bank at the speed of lightning, Matrix style, and
hopping aboard a moving train.
And one of them seems to be...
Is he blind?
Does he have like a thing over his eyes?
We should watch this one.
Looks like we're gonna be doing this the hard way.
I know.
I always thought that animation was a thing for girls with cat ears.
I didn't know those were all bows.
So you learn something new every day.
Knowledge is power.
So now they're inside
the train car and they're surrounded by
double minigun armed
robots.
And now it's Matrix
time again.
I think they're going to start
slowing. Oh, and now the robots have
thrown aside their minigun arms for blade arms, just to make things interesting I suppose.
And they're slicing the robots apart while pop music plays.
I'm feeling it. Yeah!
I'm feeling it. Yeah.
I'd like to know more about why these robots are evil.
Let's do this.
You need a backstory?
Are you pro-robot?
I might be pro-robot, but I don't know if this hot ninja girl is the villain in the whole story and these robots just want peace.
You're coming off a little bit as a cyber lover there.
No, no, these robots are sentinels created by the just to punish her
that's not true woody that's why you just looked to the side for facts i don't know
but i'm like by the just how does he know so much they're like matrix
esque uh spinning around faster than the speed of light and slicing things apart fight.
Until they're in a, maybe like a boss fight, they've entered a new train car.
Right here?
Or are you gonna keep watching?
Hmm.
Your call.
Although, here is some sort of an enormous tarantula robot or something
okay no it's it's only got two legs no no it's killed six at least yeah it's
really long arms and then some sort of a double mounted off we feel like neither
Kyle nor would you're qualified to commentate this oh no no no I anyone else is the fucking jump right in taylor we need to get out of here
no no i don't know what's happening
these were actually uh there was four trailers showcasing a show before it came out and
the b she's black which stands for the b and ruby each one of them is the initial so there's four
girls that it mainly showcases that. You're telling me she's black
I'm not buying it. Oh, okay. He's featured as the color black
I'm like I don't see it
Hey you ready pause yeah sure
Look, I think I see where this is going very cool crunchy roll Crunchyroll, check them out. If you like anime, you gotta get Crunchyroll.
How much is it a month, Woody?
Is it $6 a month, Kyle?
Yes.
Yeah, there you go. $6 a month.
Cheaper than Netflix.
Yes. Yeah.
Alright.
So first off, do you want to
go ahead and introduce our guest to everyone?
Let's do that. Kat, can you want to go ahead and introduce our guest to everyone? Let's do that.
Kat, can you tell us about yourself?
Yes, hi guys.
I'm Kat Gunn, and I've been a competitive gamer pretty much my whole life.
I've made well over $200,000 playing competitively, and recently I spend most of my time playing
on Twitch, streaming all the latest that comes out.
I specialize in FPS and fighting games.
And I dabble in cosplay on spare time when I go to conventions and whatnot.
But mainly, yeah, I just game all the time.
There it is.
So what did you do before you could make a living off gaming?
That's pretty much all I did.
I started when I was 15.
I mean, I was gaming ever since I was little, like, two little I played against my siblings in Mario Kart
and all sorts of stuff
and I worked at
GameStop of course
that's where everyone has to work as a gamer
it's a requirement
they suck though
did you ever steal any games?
no no
I would get four hours a week
I could barely pay for my cat food
four hours a week? yeah they pay for my cat food four hours a week yeah they were really like i was the you call that work i don't know what you
call that but i had to i i talked to the boss and he'd given me another place to work at and
then when i went to the other location which is the east side where i live my car actually got
vandalized and and such so it was just, it was a bad experience
overall. And unfortunately, my district specifically, they weren't really into your knowledge of
gaming. They more so cared about just your ability to sell and push the subscriptions
down their throat and the, you know, the game informer. And I was kind of, you know, it's
just really frustrating as a co-worker to like have to constantly remind people of you know when people are at the like buying a game and they're
like all this story again of like oh i have to sign up and do all that so um yeah unfortunately
my game stop was could care less it could be used toilet paper they'd still be like it's a solid
push it so you won season two of the ultimate Gamer on the SyFy channel.
How did you get into that?
How did you get on the show?
Could we get a backstory for what that is?
Because I haven't heard of it and I need to know. Yeah, because it was four years ago.
And the directors, Michael and Derek, now do a show called Face Off,
which you may have seen, which is like special effects makeup on SyFy.
Yeah.
Yeah, so they actually stopped on the second season of ultimate
gamer and went off to do that show so unfortunately the show isn't around anymore which is a bummer
because it was 12 people living in a house uh the first the one who won got a hundred thousand
dollars and an alienware a samsung package the whole gaming setup and what you would do is a
real life challenge versus a video game challenge.
So, for instance, we played Battlefield on the PC, and we would have to, like, play off
against, we had 4v4 at that point, and the real-life challenge was paintball.
And we would have to go from three different locations while setting up this satellite
thing, and we'd shoot it, like, literally it was paintball, like, versus each other.
We were shooting each other, and it was pretty awesome because you were trying to like blind the other people from putting in codes.
And they would do that for each game.
It would all feature a whole other style of reality challenge.
And then depending on your two scores, you would pick the best would choose a person to go in against the worst.
And whoever the last man standing wins.
Can you tap your mic just to make sure the right mic's picking you up?
Woody.
Yeah, it's totally not it.
What?
That's not the mic you're using.
It looks great, though.
It's very professional.
Yeah, you sound awful.
No, I'll stop.
You sound awful.
I think you're using your webcam mic right now.
Yeah, I think it is.
It's using my stupid Logitech well while you work on
that speaking of paintball our paintball event is oh you already sound better yeah i can tell
just like the yeah much better so we now now it's awful and it's rude and it's awkward but aren't
you all glad i did this every show needs a better 100 better so comment about how much you appreciate
woody interrupting cat and be interjecting now that our paintball event is fast approaching we're show needs a joke. Much better. 100% better. Leave a comment about how much you appreciate Woody interrupting Kat.
And me interjecting now that our paintball
event is fast
approaching.
Go to
pvbomb.com.
The park is called
PV Explosion.
It's outside of
Chicago, Illinois.
We're going to be
playing there April
11th and 12th.
You need to
pre-register,
especially if you
want one of the
nicer guns that are
on one of the two
of the higher packages that they have set up for us
because they have a limited number of the better guns if you if you can figure
if you follow me so if you said it very clearly and easily I'm with you dude
thank you is the worst gun the tipman 98 I think so I think it's okay well then
you people need to sign up now because me and T-Mart hosed and Kyle had like
two goddamn machine guns.
Woody was hooked up with like matching stuff and I had to wear Kitty's old jersey and he's
a Titman 98.
It's on it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Muppet.
He's totally dressed in like girl clothes with a mechanical hopper with a shit tear
gun.
No, it wasn't a mechanical hopper.
I would shoot three
and then everyone would know where I was.
I'd have to go...
Meanwhile, I'm over there.
So if you don't want that to happen,
you need to go there,
pre-register, and if you're bringing your own
equipment and you're not concerned with that, you're like,
I don't need a gun, I don't need a mask, fuck all that,
but I want to come to your event, all you have to do is buy a case of paint.
So the case of paint, and then when you get there, let them know that you're in our group.
Otherwise, you're just going to go and play with a bunch of other random jackasses,
and you're not going to have nearly as much fun.
So make sure you go, pre-register, and I'm not sure if there's anything else.
Oh, can we watch my 45-second paintball video?
Because I cut out a few little clips of my scope setup
that I'm going to use to film at the event,
and I just wanted to show everybody,
just give them an idea of what it's going to look like.
Link it.
All right, it'll take me like five seconds.
All right.
I like how Kyle's implying that playing against him
with his assault rifle with the fucking paintballs
with fins on the back that go 100% straight
is more fun than just a bunch of random people with tipman's look at a lot more
kills in the random group but alright any subs it's true so if you want the
full effect of this video I recommend 1080p and 60 frames per second but I am
queued up at zero and I am I'm ready to play whenever ready set play
So those are regular paintballs, they're not going on that straight that targets fairly far away
This is three round bursts, that's not three round burst
Okay, oh that's not fair call it three round burst theserike rounds. Yeah, they all go in the same hole.
This is 20 yards away.
These are regular paintballs.
They're still fairly accurate.
And this is fully automatic.
And this goes on for a moment, but it's worth it.
It's worth it.
I got the scope set in,
so the balls are actually going where the crosshairs are
at about 25 yards.
And I got some 45 uh degree
sights on the left side of the gun so i they're kind of co-witnessing each other so i don't i can
uh i can sight him with my iron sights and shoot fast and i got i got mag fed first strikes i've
got a 3d printed uh first strike magazine that holds 50 rounds that i'm gonna have for the event
uh okay we're playing paintball together with fans and stuff.
On the 11th and 12th, pbbomb.com.
Kyle has assembled the most expensive paintball kit
in the history of paintball.
It's so douchey.
It is so douchey.
You want me to get it?
You want me to get the gun?
Sure, go ahead.
Let's get it.
Beyond that, take your headset off.
Now let's get started.
All right.
I'm just kidding.
But beyond that, he's been training for this.
He's legit lifting weights, hitting the elliptical.
He's out running.
He's drilling.
He's doing wind sprints.
He has gotten so into this paintball thing that he's just gonna wreck all his fans that's his
objective he's hoping that they're like young and unskilled and he can just destroy them i don't
know why he's training so hard it's like training really hard for a fencing match when you know
you're gonna get to use a glock 19 like there's no point there's no point he's gonna dominate
even if he gains 60 pounds between now and then. It doesn't matter.
Yeah, and I have done no training whatsoever.
I got into paintball.
It's a huge competitive scene for that.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's pretty awesome.
I actually had a spider, and my dad was one of those people that kind of got laughed at because he would put on, like, juggernaut suit to like, I don't want to be affected by these paintballs.
And I'm like, that makes you kind of look like a pussy.
That's true.
But there's no happy medium in paintball.
You either go out there with the padded chest thing
where everybody's like, what a dick,
or you go out there in a wife beater and short shorts from the 80s
and everybody's like, wow, what are you trying to prove?
Just wear something normal. There's no winning.
Especially not against that.
And you're so vulnerable to neck shots
and shots that still suck no matter what
you have. So this is the D.I.D.A.M.
D.I.A.M. stands for D.I.A. Assault Matrix.
It's, if you're familiar
with the DM series of
D.I.A. Rifles, it's pretty much the same
interiors with a couple of modifications.
It goes from mag fed to hopper fed with a flip of a switch over here.
How do you shoulder it?
Oh, on the, I see, I see.
I'm not going to run it like this at the event, though.
I've got a remote, so this bottle will be strapped to my back, and I'll have a regular M4 buttstock on it.
Naturally, right, right.
And how do you look through the sight? So if you, I'll show a regular M4 buttstock on it. Naturally. Right, right. And how do you look through the sight?
So if you, I'll show you over here.
So if you see.
Oh, all right.
So you co-witness on the iron sight and let the other thing film.
Yeah, all this stuff on top is for everyone else's benefit.
I don't get to use the scope or anything at all.
I'm using iron sights on the side,
but they both point at the exact same thing,
and the GoPro is perfectly lined up,
so it gets to see what scope sees.
So you're going to do like a Call of Duty montage, 2012 style?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, that's the goal.
I'm going to put one of those little replay HDd cameras uh like right here they're really really tiny they do 1080p and 60 frames and it should give
a really nice like first person viewpoint when i look down to do mag changes and stuff
i've got my scorpion tail gopro setup so there's a gopro in third person person mode like three
feet behind me you know always following me. If we find ourselves on opposite teams,
I swear to God, I'm shooting the fuck out of your camera.
That's all I'm doing.
Come on.
I'll be the blur.
I'm ready to play, man.
I've been pretty psyched up about this thing for weeks now.
Really looking forward to getting out there.
We got our flights today.
Yeah.
I was happy about that.
It was like a point of stress for me.
Lozon's writing me every day, like, when's the flight?
What's that happening?
And I feel like I'm slacking, but I'm not slacking.
It's just.
Yeah, I felt the same way, and I wasn't slacking,
and I think Kitty felt the same way, but she wasn't slacking.
It was just the, well, I hate to say it, but the feels was they waited until now, but that's when they wanted to purchase it.
Yeah, right.
Yeah, I don't want to like throw my question.
Not that they were slacking.
They just waited until now.
They waited until now.
I'm sure they didn't see it as slacking.
I'm sure they were just like, yeah, that's when we buy plane tickets.
But to us, we were like, we're getting one of them plane tickets coming.
Now, I'm sorry.
I feel like we ran all over cat but i have one more
little tidbit to add and that is so i'm flying in woody's flying in and we told and chis is coming
as well and we told chis you know um they were gonna get chis's flight as well they're gonna
fly chis in and chis is like fuck all that what am i a peasant a peasant? A peasant? You think I'm going to get an aeroplane?
What am I, a Wright brother?
I'm taking a fucking choo-choo, motherfucker.
He's taking a train from, like, San Diego to Chicago, Illinois.
No, he's not.
He's not doing that again, is he?
He took a bus last time.
And he's like, I don't like bus people.
Wait, so he won't get on a plane?
Is he afraid of flying?
No, he's got a passport.
He's flown out of the country before.
Then what the fuck?
Who would get on a train to go across the country?
He was going to take the bus again,
and I shamed him into the train.
So I don't know how that even happened.
I don't understand his motivation. He's frozen right there, but I,
I didn't know you could still take trains. I, I, yeah, I didn't know.
It's called the Zephyr. Is it, is everyone okay? Am I still frozen? No.
That's why I'm imitating Kyle. Yeah. I'm trying to prove that I'm no longer frozen.
There it is. Quality entertainment.
Especially for audio-based.
So he's taking the Zephyr in, which is this train that goes from San Francisco to Chicago,
and it has like 45 stops along the way, maybe more, I don't know.
He's got to lay over in Colorado for like three hours or something like that.
And I told him, I was like, this is how it's going to go, dude.
On my end, I'm going to get to the airport around noon.
I'm going to have myself a cocktail, maybe have some French fries or something,
because at long last my diet will be over.
Then I'm going to board the plane, be a little bit tipsy.
Two hours later, I'm going to touch down in Chicago, and we're going to go eat some delicious food with Woody.
You, at this point, will be somewhere on the end of one of the longest,
most gross journeys that anyone
has made. In an awful cornfield?
Are there really layovers on a train
or is it just intermittent hobo meetups?
Just go
across the country. I imagine every stop
there's a bunch of flaming barrels with guys
with fingerless gloves warming their hands.
Over those big cans
yeah like in Home Alone
when I hear train I picture
like you having your own state room
sort of a bunk bed situation
kind of like maybe if you were going on a cruise
but that's not what it's like at all
it is like a bus
you will have a chair
and it will suck and you won't shower
for days and it will suck, and you won't shower for days. And it's, yeah.
I can't imagine why he's doing that, but he's making like a two or three day journey to get in,
and I'm going to make a two hour flight.
But, yeah.
Two hours, 11 minutes.
Welcome to modern technology.
Don't you love that?
Yeah, it's great.
Then you could be angry if it's like 219
liars but uh he's gonna be on the train for days for days yeah so at some point chiz will get there
and uh you can come play paintball with the three of us so make it happen go click that link and
pre-register i really do like these events like i like them for a couple reasons i like playing
paintball i love paintball um i like meeting up fans, but it's weird when you meet up with fans at like PAX or something
because I'm there for work and they're there because they like video games
and I'm kind of trying to go about it.
I'm trying to work and they're trying to have fun
and it's just a weird meetup environment with the music and lights and everything.
But when we meet up at these paintball things,
we're kind of cooperating together
to do something. I'm counting on fans to
have my back so I don't get shot in the ass
and I'm also hosing fans down.
So we always have a good time, get to hang
out.
I always thought it was going to be awkward when I did
the first one. I thought it was going to be weird.
But it never is. Everybody usually has a good time.
There's always a couple weirdos, let's be honest.
Well, that's a guarantee. There will be a couple weirdos, let's be honest. Well, that's a guarantee.
Don't make fun of that one guy.
I mean, we've got hundreds of thousands of
followers and viewers and such, so
you're going to have a couple of weird
motherfuckers. We all know who they are.
We've been to the event. Last time I was there, that guy
wanted to wrestle me.
He did wrestle you.
Yes. I did beat him.
Yeah.
And then I uploaded it to YouTube.
Yeah, you wrestled a 16-year-old in public.
That guy was 18, I think.
I'd say so.
He was smaller than me, though.
I appreciated that.
He was wearing a Letterman jacket.
I mean, I don't know how old he could have been.
He was in high school.
His wrestling team was like state champions or something.
Not him personally. but his team was.
Yeah, okay, well, fair enough.
He gave you a pretty good go of it until you choked him into submission,
as we all saw out there on the grass.
Yeah, wrestlers always give up the guillotine.
I had that coming since before we tapped hands.
He was a child as well, so maybe he just didn't expect you to choke him like that.
You never know.
Yeah, he got four or five decades of experience on the kid.
Four or five decades.
Yeah, you never saw that choke coming.
Yeah, well, I mean, look, if I'm choking someone,
I don't know why they were surprised about that.
It's par for the course.
Fair enough.
But, yeah, we always have good –
I remember there was one guy who drove up from Texas to Chicago
to do one of my events,
and he had brought his guns with him.
And that's kind of a no-no in Chicago.
But he just wanted to show them to me.
Come on, right in the truck. Let me show you my guns.
And I'm just like, nah. Nah, that's all right.
I'm going to stay in here.
You didn't even indulge him.
He drove... He risked jail time to bring them to Chicago.
You think I'm going to walk with this stranger from Texas back to his vehicle way out in
the parking lot?
You've been to CPX.
You know how big that parking lot is.
He was in the back.
He wanted me to walk from the field out to the back to his truck so he could get out
a weapon.
Kyle, I don't.
No, I'm not going to tell this story.
Never mind.
No, I don't tell that one.
No, I don't tell that one nah I don't tell that one
maybe some other time
we'll wait for the statute of limitations to wear out
we're all over cat here
poor cat
I want to hear about what games
that you were just a dynamo in
and which ones maybe you play now
that you suck at
aren't you like a champion
at like Left 4 Dead or something?
No, I actually just got done beating Bloodborne.
That just came out. I'm picking up Dark Souls 2, the one that's for the
next gen and PC.
Is the first one as hard as they say it is?
I had never played them
but people call Bloodborne
easy mode and I died well over
150 times
before I beat the game.
If that's easy mode, I'm not looking forward to
Dark Souls. I died more than that in COD 4.
No
fighting in the war room. Fuck you.
It's possibly hard.
I remember that stupid mission.
It is timed. I'm sorry, this is about
Kat. I'm interrupting.
Is it? No, that's fine.
So no fighting in the war room has a section
in cod 4 if you don't know it it's timed and if you beat a certain amount of time it'll do a
checkpoint right and I got myself in this situation where like I don't know what it was but say six
minutes and 30 seconds left I had got that far and it was the absolute minimum required so I just
kept starting from there with very little time to accomplish a task and and i literally spent
like 200 tries getting it from there i almost hired a guy to beat it for me i had a guy all
lined up he agreed to beat it for 30 and and i agreed to pay for it i just wanted him to get
past that little section i didn't know how saves work now i do and it wouldn't have worked at all
like him saving it on his xbox or
whatever but um yeah i just wanted him to get past you know that thing and then i could continue
playing the game and the only reason it didn't happen is uh i like couldn't get a hold of him
like he was never available at the right time and i beat it on my own before i was able to set it up. So Kat, are you all
about consoles, PC,
everything? I just got a, New Egg
just made me a PC. They built me a really badass
PC. So I've been trying to, like
I play H1Z1,
which has been a lot of fun because you get
to kind of run in. I like H1Z1 because
it's that environment where you can find other streamers,
which I've noticed doesn't
happen a lot in other games. In H1Z1 you can play Battle Royale, which I've noticed doesn't happen a lot in other games.
In H1Z1, you can play Battle Royale,
which allows you to kind of run into other people.
And it's all about interacting and deciding
whether you're going to kill someone or join up with them.
And for me, it's a lot of abuse of like,
fuck you, cunt.
And I'm like, what?
So H1Z1 is a lot of fun for the social interaction.
The game itself is really kind of bare bones.
Does the abuse wear on you at all? Because you do a lot of Twitch streaming, the abuse.
Everyone knows that Twitch comments can often be like just a cesspool of
awfulness. Yeah, I just got a message from another streamer, a female, who was
asking for tips about that, about haters and like how to deal with the kind of
people that are in Twitch because there are some people that that really hate on you and there's some people that really like you too deal with the the kind of people that are in twitch because there
are some people that that really hate on you and there's some people that really like you too so
there's kind of both girls get their own brand of hate too yeah yeah they can but i feel like it's
it's i really just like you're my my skin has gotten so thick for this kind of stuff like i
have so much armor on that it's very hard for them i have really good moderators i actually
have them all in a in a chat and I talk to them
about what's going on, what to promote, and also I have mod meetings about if there's anything to, you know,
if you're confused about what needs to be timed out or what needs to be banned.
But other than that, I mean, it's just I've gotten so used to it. There's nothing that surprises me anymore.
What bothers me is I've been streaming, I do every Monday I stream with my dad, and he's a huge nerd.
His gamer score is 214,000 on Xbox.
He plays too much.
Holy smokes.
I know. He's bad.
He played the Hannah Montana game just to get the points out of it.
I'm like, Dad, you're embarrassing me.
All of a sudden you're 12 again. Go on.
I know, right?
But he had a comic card store when I was younger,
and that's what got me into the whole nerd realm.
And we've had pinball tables, every single console you can imagine.
I still have comic books, like thousands and thousands of comic books,
magic cards, anything you can imagine that would be in a comic card.
So we even had laser discs.
I don't know if you remember laser discs.
Oh, I had laser discs.
Yeah.
So we even sold those at the comic card store.
And when he streams with me, that's when I get the whole new realm of comments, too,
where they're like, is that your boyfriend?
And my dad's 60.
He's turning 60.
I'm not judging.
Yeah.
Some of the comments, though, are just like, seriously, guys?
That's so bad.
Yeah.
I was about to ask.
So your armor is thick. i get that right i'm getting
thicker every year i've been on youtube since 2009 or something but there are still things they can
say that like do penetrate the armor and it's usually not the most vile stuff you know they
my subs have heard this before but when they threaten to like rape my wife and daughter and
stuff i'm like what is it it's so boring but uh every so
often they'll be like the color correction on this is awful and i'm like oh really you think i tried
so hard what is it that gets you um it's weird because sometimes you wonder like how these people
know that one string that's inside you that you think is impenetrable and they find a way to be
like er um but yeah they they do find things that that
even I'll feel like I after winning the ultimate gamer show you know you get a lot of fans from
that and then I had somebody message me a good like it's like essay sized about hey I followed
you I respect you but I've noticed that you've been showing a lot of boobs a lot of cleavage
and I just think you're selling yourself out and you're a sellout
and i'm like so i like go to my dad who luckily knows everything about this kind of stuff and
i'm like you know i'm just wondering like am i a sellout like is that something that's
you know because that's probably the biggest problem i have is the over
exaggerated comments about booty has been whoring out his hairline for years now.
He flashes it.
He flaunts it.
He shows it off.
He doesn't care.
It's all about the views.
That's the direct attack for girls is to immediately go for the fact that they're used more for selling things based on their image.
they're used more for selling things based on their image.
And when people see the whole boob thing,
they tend to instantly use that as your way of being legitimate.
And a lot of the ways of me just brushing that off is knowing that I have accumulated accolades
from playing video games for so many years.
But it still gets to me because I'm just like,
oh, what do I do?
Do I look like a freaking nun and cover myself up and pretend like I'm not showing anything? I just gets to me because I'm just like, oh, what do I do? Do I look like a friggin' nun
and cover myself up
and pretend like I'm not showing anything?
I just learned to get over it
and be like, you know,
behind their keyboards,
they can say anything
with no consequence
and that's the worst part.
I think there's some sort of happy medium,
like maybe a habit in the boobs.
Is that what that thing is called?
I actually use my hair now.
I'm just like, okay,
they may be there,
but now you guys ain't gonna see it.
Shucks.
What is it called that a
nun wears on her head?
A hat.
I'm not Catholic.
I think, no, just start doing, do a few
sessions of your livestream where you do
dress in like a full body gimp
suit with nothing showing and see if that,
well, no, that's a bad idea.
Don't do it with a gimp suit. Dress like a nun.
Just see. See if anything changes. Do you have a gimp suit idea. Don't do it with a gimp suit. Do it with... Dress like a nun. Just see.
See if anything changes.
Do you have a gimp suit handy?
It's called a habit.
I was right.
No, I do.
I stream in sweaters and all different things.
It's like no matter what, they're still abusive.
I mean, it's why I have the eyes.
So it's like eye contact is a problem.
I let them have whatever they want to have.
Is that a minion shirt?
Yeah, it's a minion.
Oh, that's neat. it's a Minion.
Oh, that's neat.
It's big for me, yeah.
I call my people Mystic Minions because my gamertag's Mystic.
I talked to my father about hate once, but unlike yours, he knows nothing about the scene.
Like, he has no clue whatsoever.
However, he's an expert in Fox News, so he starts drawing these parallels. He's like, oh, yeah, Bill O'Reilly goes through the same thing.
And I mentioned to him that, so i did a charity drive right i did a charity drive in which i
donated 100 of the money raised to charity and i got all this hate for it and it's like
motherfucker how do you hate on that and uh apparently bill o'reilly does the same thing
he does something for wounded warriors where he he sells pens and coffee cups and stuff.
All of his merchandise, all that goes to Wounded Warriors.
And he gets a lot of hate for that too.
And he's like, he just doesn't let it phase him.
He lets it go. He knows the truth is.
And it actually helped a little bit.
I was like, alright.
Maybe there's more established people out there
who have sort of
written the book on how to deal with this nonsense.
I'm still almost convinced Bill O'Reilly is just the greatest troll on earth just he and glenn beck get together and
laugh and laugh at everyone like can you believe they bought this i just wrote a bunch of ridiculous
nonsense on a whiteboard a bunch of old people are taking notes at home like i'm only halfway
with you bill o'reilly manages to find a happy medium he's a
conservative but i think he mostly says you know what he feels and does glenn beck on the other
hand just invents bullshit bullshit like it i think the building that msnbc is on has like wheat
in it and he's like and we all know you harvest wheat with a sickle and the
russian flag has a sickle on it and this is a communist building right here in new york and
it's like what the you're you're shitting me right like you're just you're making you're totally right
woody with like the because i've watched clips of him online and he does segue into things with
those phrases like and as we all know because then all those people at home are like oh well it's not like i don't
know this i'm onto it just like glenn beck i get it i know what he's saying and so he's just
tricking those old fucks and my father um so people get i mean i know my father's like this
crazy conservative uh loon and um he has good points too but he's he's got that one and uh
he's like i'm not influenced by glenn beck at all but then i see him in person and he wears the
glenn beck outfit like he'll wear like the slacks with the the running shoes and the and the the
button down shirt and stuff and he's like look i got my glenn beck clothes on like you're role
modeling the wrong people, Dad.
But, yeah.
I haven't watched Fox News in quite a while.
I feel like my soul is better for having not watched it.
Actually, I don't watch any news at all anymore.
I really cut out a lot of TV.
If it's not on Netflix or, I don't know, somehow aggregated through Reddit, I really don't get it.
Yeah, I keep up with the news on the internet a lot.
Obviously, as a Netflix guy, there's no current news you can watch on TV or anything.
But I worry I'm not getting a broad and fair view.
The internet tends to be a little liberal.
A little liberal?
It's just a liberal fiasco on most parts of the internet like there's a couple sites where
it's really conservative but for the most part you go to any forum anywhere and it's going to
be overwhelmingly liberal what does that tell you yeah probably i've noticed uh news even
regurgitates twitter and facebook though like they'll say like this happened on youtube this
happened on twitter and it's like oh okay and they treat that like news like that was their research in recent news justin bieber went to cold stone
where they were out of bubble gum did you guys watch the justin bieber roast at all did you see
that i haven't yet no i've heard about it i don't have tv so i don't get to watch it live
i saw it on the internet and um i was a little disappointed like the basic format was there were
like i don't know
how many six or eight roasters the roasters would roast every other roaster and then spend like one
minute on justin bieber and uh it was just like that kind of sucks like i'm not here no matter
the show that's how most roasts go yeah yeah they spread the hate around because otherwise it would
just after 15 minutes of watching nine different people get up and spend an eight minute set just beating the shit out of one guy you'd be like this is so
mean in the case of justin bieber though that's that's what i was looking for
i hear you i've seen other roasts and i i feel like they at least divide their time 50 50 that
they would just barely touch on justin i almost got the impression that they were kind of
doing it like almost as a dig at Justin. Like in my head, I built this scenario where like this
whole thing is arranged to make Justin look more likable and they're not doing it. They're like,
you know, I'm going to hear, I'm going to talk about every other roaster and screw Justin Bieber.
I'll barely mention him. And that's how it went time and time
again has he done anything to be really and i don't know much about the guy but has he done
that much to be really hated as a person or is he just you know just like the standard like oh
yeah let's do you like i don't know shenanigans and just ignorant remarks and just stuff that you
you hear him say stuff and you're just like oh that guy's a douchebag yeah i heard about the
anne frank thing and the anne frank thing was i laughed because i was like this can't be real this is an onion thing
like you can't be like oh martin luther king would have loved me too aren't i great like
so what happened is co-opting historical figures the the hater version of the story is justin
bieber says anne frank would be a fan of his she'd be a believer the full version is he
heard that she was into pop culture and then from that extrapolated that she might have been into
him had they been in the same timeline she probably would have been yeah i don't know why
it's such a belief to say that anne frank would have been a believer you think that she was like
all she was a little girl you think that all she did was write that fucking diary she'd love justin
bieber very well may have but the stuff about like throwing eggs at people letting his friends take the fall for all the
drugs he does the amounts massive amounts of drugs he does um shit now he sounds cooler
i wish i could i had more like you know why do people hate justin bieber factoids but it
seems like there's another one oh Oh, all the like insane.
I can beat you up.
Posturing that he does rubs me the wrong way.
And,
you know,
trying to beat up cameraman and things like that.
Um,
he tries to be a fake tough guy,
fake tough guy.
I'm really not a fan.
Heck.
I don't like his clothes,
although they do look comfy.
I don't know what his clothes send a picture.
Cause I don't know what you're referring to.
Uh, we, I don't know what his clothes send a picture because I don't know what you're referring to
are we going to Justin Bieber wardrobe
choices
absolutely
hang on tie boys and girls
hold on
I can't wait to send you
Justin Bieber outfits
I thought he mainly like always is shirtless shirtless and, like, showing off his muscles.
At least whenever I see.
I think of him as the characteristic pants.
I saw him on the cover of a magazine at the grocery store today.
Do you see his pants with the very low crotch?
Yes.
If you look up, like, Justin Bieber clothes, you will find a lot of that.
Here.
He's just trying to be mc hammer he looks like
if they made a movie in 1989 about what lesbians would look like in 2020 this is what the character
would look like look at the second picture the one on the right in particular why are his pants
why is the crotch ending at his knee it does does look comfortable for a stay-at-home pair of pants. Because he has a poopy diaper, clearly.
Well, these are extreme examples
of his poor wardrobe choices, I think.
Dude, it's not hard to find these examples.
Fair enough, okay.
Why are his shoes different colors?
There are endless pictures.
Here's a third one.
This is what he wears.
Why are his shoes different colors
they are different here's a fourth one oh this is pretty hilarious one was enough
yeah i think i think i'm done i i could do this all night baby if it was like a sit around the
house kind of sweat pant thing if someone offered you those wouldn't you wear them those look
pretty comfortable this is what i would expect an old homeless black lady to be wearing an old homeless black what you think
she can afford bieber pants i i yes yes i this is what i've seen remember that black lady we saw
pooping on that building in la that time woody you weren't outside though oh never mind i don't
think i saw the poopy lady wearing the same wearing the same pants. That's all that matters.
Was she?
She was loud.
I have a topic lined up
about pants.
Oh.
Oh.
Alright, so check these out.
This is
CNN.
Shit, I'm not trendy enough.
Lululemon? Lululemon? Yeah, yeah trendy enough. Lululemon?
Lululemon, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Lululemon smash new hit.
Pants with manhood in mind.
Right?
So Lululemon has finally designed pants specifically designed for men who feel constrained in the crotch.
Those of us with the, you know, the cervix pounders.
The ABC anti-ball crushing pants are made with
extra space to give you and the family jewels room to breathe you guys are all looking like
this is crazy this is outstanding loaded yet but that's a good idea just make the pants more
comfortable what's wrong with that it's a freaking great idea i i i think this would be fantastic
like women's clothing has been made with boobs in mind for ages right like if you hold a woman's shirt there's room for boobs in there like even on a hanger you're like oh yeah
i see they astute observation that is cat is disagreeing me how can you no no as a as a woman
with there's a lot of a lot of it's just made for skinny model types actually it's very hard i have
to go up to like i wear large even though i don't necessarily look large because of that kind of stuff.
It's all over the place.
I don't like the look of these pants.
I think they were the same people too.
They were the ones that had the see-through pants debacle.
Yeah.
Where you bend over.
They had female yoga pants at the same price, over $100.
But they were so sheer that if a girl bent over, you could see out like the color of her underwear you could pretty much see through them
I was outraged when I heard it
yes yeah
despicable
it's mainly the price that they charge for that kind of
stuff to be uh
so you'd have been okay with it had they been cheaper
sure why not
I don't ever spend over a hundred bucks
on any kind of item of clothing so I'm not
really in that
I just hope this so I'm not really in that.
I just hope this is, I'm seeing these are $128 pants,
which is more than I spend too.
But maybe this is just like first mover advantage, right?
And then there'll be a whole wave of testicle-friendly pants rolling out.
Like that would be an awesome. I feel like if you've got so much going on down there
that like pants don't work anymore, maybe you're the problem.
Maybe it's not your Levi's that need to change.
Maybe you need to go to your proctologist.
No, clearly you're right, Kyle, but this is very good marketing
because a bunch of guys are going to be like,
Oh, my fucking cock's so big, I need new pants.
And then they're going to go buy these and be like,
Hey, what are you doing in those goofy-looking, long, khaki-short-looking, ugly pants?
They're like, oh, my cock's too big.
Couldn't even fit in Dodgers.
I could just imagine these guys stomping into Lululemon's store,
just like, excuse me, do you have any of those enormous cock pants?
I need four pairs immediately.
I'll be wearing that pair out of the store.
I'm so constrained like no
it seems a little silly i don't know it's pandering but that's a good marketing move
you're gonna get a lot of idiots buying those ugly pants i swear to god on the other end of this
i'm sorry what'd you say i take it they made up abc the new acronym for anti-ball crushing
yeah i assume i hadn't heard of it before.
Wow, now I feel like the douchebag that you're making fun of, but I
genuinely think that pants should
be made with a little more room downstairs.
Especially jeans. Shorts!
I have all the room in the world.
No, I agree with you, but they
should be made that way. It shouldn't
be the apex of their
marketing, where it's like forget about
the ugly color and how it has six shitty pockets on it that are gonna tear right off you got a big
cock and we know it's right like just but they're even calling them testicle friendly like they're
not making it as if you know you need lots of room for your flaccid penis are you telling me
that the reason that you've been wearing those goddamn plaid shorts
for the last five years non-stop
is because there's just not enough room
in a regular pant to facilitate
your manhood?
Yeah, he's been
wearing those since I've known him.
Aren't those
cargo shorts, right?
I thought they were
cargo pants without pockets.
I'm sexy and I know it. Cargo pants without pockets, right? I thought they were cargo pants without pockets. I'm sexy and I know it.
Cargo pants without pockets, right?
Don't cargo pants have ABC?
I would say so.
Cargo pants without pockets.
I don't think I own a pair of shorts.
I can't imagine that.
I don't like wearing shorts because once you've made a commitment for a couple years to not wear shorts, you can't
wear shorts because your legs have the color of someone
who's been dead for three days.
It's just so pale and bad.
Exactly, Kyle. Just not ideal.
I got sunburned
today. Look at that.
Can you see it?
Let's see. I feel embarrassed.
It's just a stupid person's
pain nice kyle kyle you got some guns there looking all right i got very burnt uh the day
before yesterday none of us brought sunscreen and by the time that it was over we all looked
like we'd walk through the sahara like the one the guy who brought the guns he had on like thick
glasses and he's white patches circled by this crimson red mask that was
his new face it was a long day in the sun i've been working outside lately and uh i guess the
this today was day three so i thought foolishly that you know having done like two partial days
before i was sort of building up a tolerance but that was not the case so
no you were building up a tolerance to the sun over the course of three to four days
that's what a tan does right like if you're tan you don't get burnt and um you don't tan though
haven't you looked in the mirror lately like in the last 40 years you've never once like like
figured you've got you've got freckles what are you doing i i don't
tan well that's that's true but i thought you know i i am capable of it it just doesn't happen
in two days i forgot i'm gonna have to go do something about like this this crazy farmer's
tan i've got going on because the back of my neck is like scorched the it's kind of hard to tell on
camera because the lights but my face is all burnt my nose is burnt and like from there down is burnt
so I'm going to have to even out so I don't look
ridiculous. Are you going to work with your shirt
off? Uh maybe
I don't know. Just a thought
I don't care. I like how he wants
to know that. You're going to work with how your shirt off right?
Oh it's just about to get gayer.
Topless fence placing right?
Topless fence planting
at my house?
Just saying.
Oh.
Fix your farmer's tan.
Just me shirtless with just work gloves.
With a post hole digger.
Just slamming it down over and over.
The dust is flying up from my exertion.
Sweat's dripping down my brow, and I wipe it away.
There's a little bit of dirt mixed in with the sweat,
and as I pour a big thing of one of those big jugs of water and it just kind of
pours down my chest. Never mind I don't want it anymore
No?
Because I don't want to be any fucking
fences
I'm going to stop
for topics now
Alright so where do we go from here? Kat
it's your turn to pick a topic. I was going to end that last one. I actually
do get make fun of on stream,
especially with the monitors being white and stuff.
I do look fairly white, and even my dad's now
calling me pasty because I'm a gamer. I just
don't get out. I stay up.
I usually stream until like 3 or 4 in the morning too,
so my schedule is completely nocturnal.
So yeah, kind of sucks not getting out.
You've definitely got a vitamin D deficiency.
I think we all do.
Not me anymore.
I'm burnt like an idiot.
How does that work?
I take vitamin D supplements.
Really?
No, I don't think that's a thing.
I just want to fight up against myself for a while.
It is a thing.
Kitty actually has vitamin D supplements.
Maybe I should take some of that.
Kitty.
It's her name, Catherine.
It's not. Her birth certificate says Kitty.
She's pretty. Really? It's actually
Kitty.
Nice.
What was I going to say? Now we know.
I could talk about some of the videos I filmed this week.
We had some crazy stuff happen.
Trying to think what else I did
this week.
I bring house talk.
I don't think PKA has heard about my subcontractor's prison record yet.
Oh, yeah.
Let's talk about Jamal.
You were still going on Jamal?
That guy is out of control.
Yeah.
So people on the subreddit know this already,
but I looked up him on the Better Business Bureau.
I just started doing like a background check because he put that lien against my house.
And for people who don't know what that is, briefly, they file a lien against the money you owe the general contractor.
Right. So now that I'm notified of it, I can't pay the general contractor.
He's sort of like said $6,000 worth of that.
It's marked off as his.
And if I do foolishly play the GC, then I could pay Jamal again, right?
So pay for the same work twice.
So I started looking into this guy like, huh, you know, like who is he?
Whatever.
I looked up his Better Business Bureau rating.
It's an F.
Like he has five or more complaints that he's never replied to and
such pretty much everyone he works with dings him and he's an f he's been out of prison for two
years and three months now he has eight felonies six of which are for selling drugs and two of
which are for violent assault with serious injuries on different dates, right?
Like he's beating people up and hurting them, yeah.
It wasn't like, you know, it was like one bad night or something.
No, twice he's gotten felony convictions for this.
This is the guy that the GC gave the password to my house to.
So change the password.
And so that's a thing.
But overall, it's coming along. i i think there's maybe just two more
weeks left on this thing and you're talking about your door password for like it's for the um garage
door actually so there's like a pat like a little keypad there and uh with the garage door you can
get into the house and and that's that so we had to change it um i guess that's it they they
it. I guess that's it. They messed up the upstairs floor that had laminate on it, and that laminate was discontinued, so they started ripping it out of other rooms and putting
it as a supply, and we put real hardwood in the room that it came out of, but that's nearly
done. I don't know. I built them a punch list and i think
maybe two weeks and tomorrow they have a cleaning lady coming and i'm kind of psyched for that
because it's a wreck and uh it's just coming together i haven't really felt a positive vibe
about it ever until just recently things are getting close they're putting like plates back
on their switches and receptacles
and things like that it is uh finally in the home stretch how did jamal win you over to initially
hire him what did he what did he convince you with they threatened you find these guys so i hired the
general contractor and um you know i hadn't met jamal and neither had the GC. But the general contractor went to a local supply house and said,
these are the tasks we need to do.
Can you refer us to somebody?
And they're like, oh yeah, Jamal's good.
And since then, the supply house stopped working with him.
And of course, my general contractor's suing him.
It's a wreck.
But yeah, I hired the wrong GC, I guess.
And he hired the wrong subs.
So that's how that went down. So lesson here to look that up first, right? Look it up.
The better business. So what happened was we started getting recommendations from people that we knew, like for general contractors. One was from the decorator. Another
one was from our real estate agent. And, uh, we had known the real estate agent for a year. We
had known the decorator for like two weeks and their quotes were within a thousand bucks of each
other. So we went with the one that the real estate agent, real estate agent recommended
because we knew him longer and we trusted him. And, you know, I guess he'd been in the area for so long,
we thought he'd know the scoop.
But it didn't turn out like that.
So he said it'd be done in two weeks.
He started in mid-January.
It was supposed to be done January 31st.
It's March 2nd as we're talking about this.
April 2nd.
April 2nd, my mistake.
April 2nd.
You're shortchanging your failure of hiring practices.
So yeah, while it is looking positive at last,
and the painting's done, the floors are nearly done,
all the big stuff is done.
They just have trim and light switches
and little QA issues to sort out.
I gave them a punch list.
It's like a page and a half long.
And they didn't balk at a single one.
They're just working it through.
So maybe end of April, we'll do a house tour.
Bullshit.
You're not making it in that house anytime this year.
It's just not going to happen.
Something's going to happen.
Like, here's what I envision.
So I imagine you're going to get everything settled with your current general contractor all of these miscreant contractors
They'll all be dissolved rid of you'll pay them off. They'll take what they're owed and be gone
You'll get a new crew of guys, and they'll get the job 99% done. You're gonna. Love it
You're pretty much ready. You call them the u-haul guys. You're getting everything organized
That's when the disaster hits something's coming woody i can feel it a twister earthquake sinkhole i don't fucking know maybe a flood
something's coming it's it's you've been it seems like you've been jinxed every step of the way
and i know how it feels like i that whole story i told you today about going out to film
and fucking it up four times in a row.
That I just feel like sometimes the, the, the cards are stacked against you.
The odds are just not going to play out in your favor and you're just doomed.
I hear you.
I think it's sometime, some point perseverance pulls through when you get it done.
It turns out.
Okay.
I mean, maybe, maybe put the house on the market and then just be rid of it.
Just be rid of it. It could be like a poltergeist house.
What if you move in and there's poltergeists?
How ridiculous is that going to be?
That would be so badass.
I would love that.
Yeah, I wish I knew what else to say.
We're finally closing in.
I've got to sort out the shop.
I'm just sort of taking a moment to breathe.
I want the house to be done.
I want to pay my taxes, count the money,
and then see what the budget is for the shop.
Count the money.
That sounds like a fun, that's a fun job, right?
Counting money?
Yeah.
No.
I remember, like, growing up,
my dad would keep a good amount of cash on hand.
He would oftentimes cash, checks just so he'd have a lot of cash on hand.
There'd be $35,000 or $40,000 of cash there.
He would keep it locked up in the vault and everything.
Honestly, it's just he and I that have the safe combination, so it wasn't that big of a deal, but I just remember being a little kid, being like eight,
and I'd be home alone, and I'd get
50 grand in cash, just throw it up in the air,
make it rain, and roll in and stuff.
An eight-year-old, the combination to a safe
with $50,000 in it?
And a few weapons. I don't know about
maybe 50. How else am I going to
get to my guns? I got to know the combination.
That's a sad point. You should be more impressed
than an eight-year-old could operate one of those
spinny combination locks.
Think about that, and remembering the
combination. Yeah, three numbers.
Wow. Okay, well, there's
the left-right pattern as well.
Two directions and three numbers.
Pass it on the second it goes through.
I remember there were three kids in high school
that were so fucking dumb, they had to get
special locks. They couldn't figure out the combination and the teachers just gave up. There was that kid kids in high school that were so fucking dumb. They had to get special locks.
They couldn't figure out the combination, and the teachers just gave up.
There was that kid at every high school.
I'd rather wear jackets. I couldn't get it, and the janitor was there in the hallway after every class,
helping him shimmy the door open, looking at him like,
you goddamn idiot.
It's one, one, two.
We did this for you.
I would always leave my locker unlocked anyway but because like who's gonna fuck with the locker
except for me I was literally
the motherfucker who like when I'm like
the only one walking down the hall I'm like jimmying
them all like open open open
open locked locked locked locked locked
in my high school if you didn't spin the
the lock it didn't relock like you had
to give it that twist
yeah exactly yeah that's how ours were ours were so i would look for ones that people hadn't done
that to you know go in there and mess with their shit i wouldn't i wasn't a thief i was more of a
prankster so like so i just fucked with their shit i was a vandal there you go former prankster i
like i like it that way so of course you do you vandal whatever it i was i
definitely was more of a prankster though because that that's what that's what i always got in
trouble for it was always pranks it was never anything like malicious or like i was never
trying to hurt anybody it was always just just hijinks and shenanigans you never saw like an
especially good looking lunch and took that ever you never never saw, oh, this guy's mom
made him something pretty dope today
and I don't have shit. Oh, God, no.
No, I would never. No.
First of all,
there was some sort of a stigma I felt
when I was in high school for bringing your own
lunch. Like,
when you're in elementary school, it's cool
because you've got something mom made.
But when you're in high school, it's like, I don't want mom's food.
I'll eat what the cool kids eat.
And like the only people who brought their lunches were like really, really awkward kids.
And just just I didn't you wouldn't want to be that guy who breaks open that fucking
Frigidaire little mini cooler and starts getting out your puddings and shit.
Like my high school was totally different. Well, yeah the 20s you were a metal tail you were carrying so most people
most people bought lunch right that was the thing however the athletes would bring their lunch
right they're the ones who had like you know like protein and a rice or something like that like
they would have carefully planned out meals and if you did that but weren't an athlete, you were, like, a wannabe.
Like, it's worse.
So either know your role or, you know, I guess it's know your role in either case.
So it wasn't until I became, like, I was a swimmer, and if your cat doesn't know,
it wasn't until, like, my senior year when I started, like, bringing my own lunch and being cool.
That's what made you cool i've
always look at me i eat lean protein and brown rice anyone jealous do you remember every once
in a while in like middle school uh it wasn't grade school because it didn't fucking matter
but in middle school and high school when you would see a friend who brought their own lunch
and they took the napkin out and it was no mere napkin there was a note scribbled on from
their mom and you would snatch it away and read it to everyone oh how terrible have that you never
noticed anyone with a little note written on there maybe it's just two or three instances yeah
noticed it but i would never steal a kid's note that's his that's from his mama i know i was a
dick but and you'd read it for the other's amusement?
Yes.
He's like holing it up above a short kid.
Just like, dear Jimmy, I love you so much.
I put some prunes in there so maybe you'll be able to poop tomorrow.
He's like, I'm going to get that rash taken care of.
I saw this on Reddit. So the teacher tells people that if they pass notes,
they're going to get in trouble.
He's going to read the note aloud.
So the kid scribbles out his note, whatever,
and then kind of obviously passes it to class.
And he holds it up and reads it.
And it's like, never going to give you up,
never going to let you down,
never going to run around and...
Teacher got Rickrolled.
He got Rickrolled.
Well played. I had a little Rickrolled. You got Rickrolled. Well played.
I had a little Rickrolled the day before yesterday.
Did you see my April Fool's video?
I got Rickrolled by it.
I was like...
I recognized, of course, it was an April Fool's video,
but I was like, I want to see where this links to.
What do he has going on?
Can we watch it?
It's only like a minute long,
and I promise I won't file any copyright strikes against you.
Link it.
All right.
Let's see here.
Put my coffee down.
I liked Woody's April Fool's Day tweet of getting Joe Rogan on the podcast.
I didn't even tweet that.
That was like an inspect element alter thing.
Like, that's not in my timeline.
That's hilarious.
I saw you.
Take credit for it.
I said it was funny.
I didn't know it.
I got your text message to Chiz about how we landed Joe Rogan,
and I'm like, oh, I wonder what he did.
Like, Chiz must have tweeted it.
And then I saw that I tweeted it, and I did not.
But I liked it, too.
So what do we got here, Kyle?
I am linking you right now.
All right.
Let's get this thing
high quality.
I'm queued up at zero.
Is everybody ready?
Come on, Kat.
You'll like it.
I'm waiting for the commercial.
Okay.
Let me know when you're ready.
Okay. Yeah, don't you skip that?
You watch that whole fucking thing you buy that guy you watch it ten times. I'll make a penny
Fast and furious and chicks fighting awesome. Oh, that's I CPM. All right. It's good to go. All right. Ready, set, play.
Nice graphics.
Seems like that's driving on for quite a while.
It's a good shirt.
Thank you.
I like that design.
That is one of my favorites. So each of those armor plates down there can stop an armor-piercing.308 round.
But not an FPS Russia 22 armor-piercing round.
No, not with the depleted uranium and, you know, a much larger power truck.
We send this down with a little cricket here.
Don't use this pink cricket rifle, but you can actually contain the power.
Now, you're gonna notice the camera cuts away, actually, as I fire.
That's because the recoil ruined the camera.
I don't know, the footage is all blurred.
You can see the impact there.
And it's substantial.
Lots of power there.
Where did the explosion come from?
From the ammunition itself.
Those are bigger plates than I thought they were.
Yeah, those are special plates that AR500 sent to me.
Those are serious.
What actually chopped through all of those?
A 20mm anti-tank rifle that I shot out of the back of my truck.
Why was it explosive?
Because it was an explosive round from 1928.
Are you serious?
It was stamped with a fucking eagle and swastika like the Nazi emblem.
And the interesting thing, I hope I'm not wrong about this,
I believe in 1928, Germany was under the Treaty of Versailles,
which they signed after World War I.
It was really punishing rules against Germany, I can't think right now.
But one of the rules that was established is they couldn't make that kind of ammo.
So the ammo that we shot right there was actually in my opinion like a collectible item because it's an illegally produced nazi explosive round but we just used it right here
for uh my april fool's day video so i thought it was worth it taking something historically sad and
making it a joke late it's great later i took that same gun
and i shot through um four plates and then through eight inches of pressure treated concrete and then
into an oak tree so far that i could stick my middle finger into the hole and still couldn't
reach the bullet when you put the plates together they they pierce more easily and you back them
with concrete that round is well it is an anti-tank round.
You'd have a couple of
Nazis in the bushes with that solar therm
rifle. It weighs
125 pounds, something like that.
It's massive.
There's no recoil. Less recoil
than a shotgun. It's bizarre.
Because it weighs 120 pounds.
I'm sure if you got any of these minute
gun details wrong
the gun crowd won't mention it they're pretty forgiving about that sort of thing
if the treaty of versailles was signed in some other year or not a very elitist crowd no i'm
aware the treaty versailles was not signed in 1928 i just believe that nazi germany or germany
was under the conditions of that period during 1928.
I'm like 99% sure of that.
And therefore, they should not have been making the kind of ammo that they were definitely making
because I could see the stamp on the bullet that says 1928 and there's a Nazi emblem on it.
And so there.
How many more do you have?
Yeah, I mean, I know a lot too.
I'm sure that you just, would you fed those into the clip
and then drop that into the bottom of the gun?
And then it's called a 20 millimeter
because it's 0.2 inches, I think.
Yeah, nailed it.
All of those facts are exactly correct.
Travels at dozens, if not,
I mean, several dozen feet per second.
We're working on it.
Tens of feet per second. We're working on it.
I'm going to do a full video with that Solar Throne anti-tank rifle, but
I refuse to do the video until
I'm capable of shoulder firing it.
So it's a 120 pound rifle and a lot
of it's barrel, so I've got to do a
lot of curls, I think, before I'm
going to be able to do that, but whenever we're able to do it
then we're going to do the video. I want to see you shoulder my
rifle.
I could shoulder your rifle, no so bad sorry make it good cat my mind just goes there you sure you can do it on my shoulder anytime you want
woody just walk up behind me uh it doesn't matter if i know what's coming or not tell me more just
put your rifle to my shoulder and i'll see if I I'll see if I'm man enough to take it you don't think that I'm man
enough to shoulder your rifle but I promise you I am and more oh I know from
experience in Chicago Kyle is quite a man when it comes to taking a rifle yeah
so what are you okay are you in the gun really what you really really heavy rifle and I think I can shoulder I can't
shoulder it I am shocked I i'm just about able to swing it up level and then
it'll just fall right back down I can't keep it up maybe if you were there I
could shoulder right you would help me
you think if I were there you'd be able to get it up
that's what i'm hoping okay you know i'm not as young as i used to be i probably could have done
it when i was like 19 and hold you've got to get it up and hold it perfect you know like uh
perpendicular to the the horizon that you got to like straight out at least you can't have it
drooping down or anything that doesn't count you can't have a nooping down or anything. That doesn't count. You can't have a simp. No, it cannot be flaccid at all. When I was young,
I'd have been able to hold it straight up.
And then over the years, it kind of goes straight out.
And now it's just too heavy.
Oh my god, we gotta kill this.
Kat, are you into firearms?
My last name
being Gun,
I don't really live up to the last name.
I have, actually, what's getting me more into
guns strangely enough is cosplay because i cosplayed as kate beckinsale's underworld character
uh celine and she uses berettas and so i went to the shooting range to actually use the
real gun itself and this one is that i don't know if it's actually that one because there
were gun people that came in and said oh there's this extension and it has this to it
and so there is a lot of specifics
and she changes guns halfway through the movie
but it's nice having gun people
out there because they are really on top of their
shit. Wait that's not nice
that's the worst part about having gun people out there
they are so on top of their shit
heaven forbid you have like a 92F
instead of a Beretta 92
whatever the flip it is oh the way I was holding the gun in the picture Oh, my God. It was just specifically one guy. I'm intimidated by guns. I'm still getting comfortable with them.
But this guy, he doesn't even help.
He's kind of just lazy, like some sort of stoner dude or something,
just sitting there like, yeah, just go over there.
That sounds like an ideal safety officer.
Carry on.
No, yeah, but you could tell.
I even said, oh, I'm here with my friend.
This is his first time.
And he just didn't really care.
He's just like, go over there, go to that thing.
And we had to stop him at least four to five times asking him questions to make sure
that it was the proper way of doing things and yeah they just were not very uh good at assisting
which i was gonna get on like yelp where they we found them and kind of get on there and say like
yeah they need to be more on top of that because it's not good for a newbie to not have assistance
in that kind of situation but It's going to be dangerous.
That sounds like a very, very friendly, dissatisfied
Yelp review. You know, we should be more
on top of this.
I like how you didn't go to just immediate anger
and frustration. My range would have been
all over you, and not in a helpful way.
They publicly embarrass you for any
minute violation you might make.
I hate that. I hate those gun
snobs who come over and they
don't like the way you're holding your thumb when you're
putting a round into the magazine.
They'll say something about stupid shit.
You want to be putting your thumb on the shod so you're
not numbing it up for the grip.
It's like you're making shit up, you ass.
I think it's better to feel
embarrassed and learn like you'll never do it
again as opposed to just having this guy that doesn't give a shit
and he's just going off and doing his own thing.
There has to be a happy medium in there somewhere.
The problem is they'll be so nitpicky,
and sometimes gun guys will sort of revel in the fact that,
ah, I have something over this guy.
This is my area of expertise, and this guy knows nothing about it.
He might know how to do all that fancy doctoring or what but i know how to operate this cope here so you get that guy and he just really
wants to talk down to you and be an asshole like when i when i show people how to use a gun for the
first time i don't give them a bunch of bullshit that they don't need to know i just give them the
basics and and make sure they're not gonna hurt anybody or do anything dangerous and let them have
some fun and then once they've had a little fun,
then maybe they'll want to learn the difference between a clip and a magazine
and stuff like that.
And if they are too nitpicky over certain little things that don't matter
when they still haven't mentioned, like, keeping your finger off the trigger
until you're downrange and ready to fire,
you're just going to start to think, like,
okay, this can't be as serious as they're saying.
And if they're telling me to, you know, lay the gun down differently while it's still pointed down range just stupid stupid shit you
just start to rationalize in your head like this isn't as dangerous as everyone says and that's how
you make mistakes that's how you get shot that's why i like shooting in uh in my backyard better
than much more than than any range or anything or even at like machine guns uh shoots i've been to
knob creek two or three times and they have a they have even at machine gun shoots. I've been to Knob Creek two or three times, and they have
a huge machine gun shoot there.
There's hundreds of people on the firing
line, and a big horn blows,
and then everybody starts fucking shooting.
Actually, I think a cannon goes off,
and everybody starts shooting. And there's mini guns
and.30 caliber machine guns, and
all kinds of... With all those people,
you feel like it's safe?
Oh, it's very safe. There's only been like one or two deaths.
Wow.
No, no, no. Hang on now. I would feel safe
too. But no one's ever been
shot. I think the death was
like the recoil of a gun
knocked over a tripod.
And a brain aneurysm, right?
Yeah, I think it hit a girl.
You gotta imagine, it was really heavy.
Was there a hole? I don't know if there was a girl. Just right on the spot. You've got to imagine, it was really heavy. Was there a hole?
I don't know if there was a hole.
What's wrong with you?
He's like brain aneurysm right on the spot.
You're like, I think he's talking about getting shot in the head.
No, a machine gun fell over and the tripod that it was sitting on, the leg of it,
and it's a big leg, big metal heavy thing, hit a girl in the head and she died.
I think that's the only death I really know of from there.
But anyway, even with all that it's it's safe it's uh and that's i forgot where
i was going with this yeah real safe unless you're one of those two nazis hmm oh i was just gonna say
i i would prefer to shoot at my place than to ever shoot at that thing again because it just doesn't
it's just not that much fun it's it's it's just not there's it's you can't do what you really want to do it's a lot more fun
when you're on your own personal property away from the prying eyes the prying eyes of someone
who are who's going to think that what you did isn't exactly the way uh they want it done and
you have a lot more fun if you enjoy shooting you should shoot with tracers it wasn't until i shot with tracers that i understood
what the bullets did after they hit stuff and there's kind of a i guess if you shoot at a range
enough after the bullet hits its target the bullet's just kind of gone like it's hitting a
big bunch of rubber mulch or whatever it is but when you shoot with tracers against a tree and
such like you really see where they're going afterwards and it's eye-opening
and then you become safer. They go places like they're like rubber balls. Sometimes they'll just
make a right turn and go off that way. And sometimes they'll just skip straight up and just,
you know, go into the air until they just dwindle out of fire. They do weird stuff.
That's what I was doing all week. I was shooting 22 tracers at golf balls.
It was probably three years ago or something.
We went over to Wings of Redemption's house.
And Wings and his girlfriend were shooting at a tree.
And Kyle and I weren't behind that tree, but we were behind the tree and off to the side.
And Kyle's like, this is dangerous.
He shouldn't be shooting with us down range like this.
And I was in in my head,
I guess I academically understood
how it could get to us.
And then later that day,
we brought out the incendiary rounds,
and it was like, whoa.
Now I fully understand the danger we were in.
I don't know where we were shooting either.
So just a little backstory for this.
We went to Wings of Redemption's house.
Was this New Year's, or was this a different time? Do we want to catch a cat up on who wings of redemption is in case she's not familiar cat do you know who wings of redemption is oh okay oh cat
oh cat cat cat i thought all three of us should say it where do you get i've just been stuck in
the gaming world i just do gaming things. He's a gamer.
Winged Nation is a gamer. Where do you get the game?
He has...
I feel like I should know.
He has something like half a million-ish subscribers on YouTube.
He's kind of OG.
Like, I want to say that his channel started in like 2008-ish, 2007-ish.
He's largely known for COD, but he plays other games too.
He's into Fallout.
He's into Dragon's Age age he likes dark souls i
don't know if he likes the new one um battlefield so mostly a shooter guy um he's good at video
games he's got a a ridiculous sort of personality that i feel transfers really well to youtube and
he's got a crazy like home life and family life and there's always lots of drama going off and
it's like a crazy bizarre situation that he lives in and there's always lots of drama going off, and it's like a crazy, bizarre situation that he lives in.
So he's very entertaining to us.
So we went to Wing's house for, was it New Year's when we did the shooting?
Yes, it was.
It was New Year's Eve.
Yeah.
We went there for New Year's up near Myrtle Beach in Conway, South Carolina,
and I brought a truckload of guns.
I don't know how many I brought, like 10 or 15 guns and a lot of ammo too
and some Tannerite, I think. And I don't know how many I brought, like 10 or 15 guns and a lot of ammo too. And some Tannerite, I think.
And I don't know.
I don't know if we shot.
We shot before or after.
We shot a little bit.
Like on New Year's Eve, you shot some explosives.
But it was New Year's Day that we hauled everything out.
So he said, I've got the perfect place to shoot.
I got a place.
I got a place.
And so he takes us out on, I don't know where we were.
We were on public land or something.
Some swamp or something.
Yeah.
Out in the middle of nowhere, like on this dirt road.
And it just ended at a swamp.
And there the swamp was.
And we started shooting.
And it was a bizarre situation.
His whole family was there.
Bastard Brooke was there.
God rest his soul.
Gangster Grandma was there.
His mother was there. I felt like a fish in a bowl or something like like the the wings of redemption
squad was there to see like like like in my head we're normal people right and and they're the
like i i want to describe them as extreme country. We were like Martians who were new to that, who just had landed,
and they were just coming to see what the fuck was up.
And they were all kind of standing off to the side watching us as we shot guns and filmed and stuff.
They, like, huddled together to watch the things that we did.
Yeah.
Because we were outsiders.
And, yeah, go on, Kyle. I i don't know that was a fun day we shot
a bunch of different stuff and uh but but yeah wings was shooting that tree and and i felt for
sure that at any minute he could uh just kill one of us i just imagined one of those 762 by 54
millimeter tracers darting off of a tree or that plasma he was trying to hit and just taking my jugular out downrange.
But it ruined your channel. Yeah, right?
And there weren't any cameras rolling for that either.
That was an interesting day.
Shooting with Wings of Redemption.
I don't think we shot when he was here.
We were too busy filming with cows
and doing Jeremy pulls.
Have you guys spoken to him recently?
I haven't in a couple weeks.
Yeah, me too. It's been a couple of weeks
since I last talked to him.
Just doing the weekly
check-in.
I know that he's
streaming on Twitch a lot more than he had been.
It seems like his focus...
A lot of people have kind of shifted their focus
from YouTube to Twitch.
Some people quit
youtube and just do twitch now they had like what there's a girl i know ll ray ray she has like a
200 000 subs on youtube and she hasn't uploaded in three months because she's just all twitch
because that's where the money is yeah twitch has a model where basically people just donate
straight to the streamer and they get 100 of of the cash. Whereas YouTube is going the other way.
And even if you find your own brand in integration deals,
they're trying to shut that down and take a piece of that.
And it's hard when it gets split like that.
We'll see.
I find it more natural for Twitch because you can turn it on
and it's like this where you kind of sit and you talk and it's natural as opposed to like me when it comes to YouTube I like to lay
it out and like as soon as I have a script I feel really weird when I turn on the camera so like I
it's like I want to build a character too and I don't just want to be myself I want to have more
of a point and content so I guess it depends on how you approach YouTube but for me I feel so
much easier to just sit there, play a game,
talk about what's going on, and
you just relate all day long
with your chat, too.
How long have you been doing Twitch?
I've been doing it for like a
year. I've been on Twitch when it first started,
but I didn't take it
serious until about a year ago.
I got a sub button where they pay
five bucks, you get a portion
of that Twitch gets the other portion
and they get icons
and they get a little thing next to their name
depending on whatever your theme is of your chat
like for me it's my cat because I have like a Bengal cat
that everybody loves named Marble
and they also get
specific icons that you make for your chat
as well so I have a bunch I have a gun
actually that looks like a cat.
It's a cat gun. You have a Bengal cat?
Is that really expensive?
I actually bred them. They go
anywhere from $600 to $1,000 or $1,200.
But there's ones that look like
leopards and then there's ones that are
like striped and have like crazy stripe
patterns. But it's actually
I don't know. They call them Bengals
for whatever reason. It's a breed that's been around since the I don't know that they call them bangles for whatever reason. It's
a breed that's been around since the eighties and they normally they call them lap leopards
because they look like the main bangle is like a mini lap leopard. But the one I have, she has
like kind of just all sorts of crazy variations on her coat. And I, it was fun. It was a whole
experience for me. I did three generations of breeding them. Why did you stop breeding them?
It was essentially selling them and getting them to a house that you would think cares as much as you do for the cat.
I went to check up on some because they have to get neutered or spayed depending on where they go.
And I went to check up on a guy cat that I'd sold.
And the condition he was in was nothing that I would want a future cat to be in uh the room was just like really smelly it smelled like boy cat
and uh she just she had like a gajillion other animals too she had five acres of like horses
chinchillas ferrets like anything you could think of she owned it yeah normal sane person right
i don't know how you even take care of that many animals. Like, you literally have to spend your whole day feeding and caring and cleaning just for animals.
So I think she had a squad of people just to do that as well.
So after that experience, I was just like, I can't trust the people that they go to, unfortunately.
So I just did it for my own personal cat and kept one of them out of the breed.
Do you know who John Jones is?
Do you know who John Jones is?
Those huge ones?
No, that's ocelots. Those are
ocelots. Those are the $22,000
dog height leopard. That's what John Jones
said, so I put a link in the description.
This guy's cat, he said he paid
$25,000 for it here.
Yep, yep, that's it.
They're supposed to get huge. They get like
they get super big. Here, I'm going to see
a picture of ridiculous cat.
$25,000.
Why?
Isn't that crazy?
I paid $25,000
for an animal that couldn't give less of a shit
about me. I could die and
30 seconds later this thing will be eating me.
90% of my phone album is a cat anyway.
Trying to find more pictures of this cat
with things to scale
yeah I'm having a hard time
finding ones that really show off her side coat
if you guys can see that at all
they're very talkative
they actually fetch
I have a video on my Facebook where she fetches
and she brings it back and you keep throwing it,
she brings it back.
So they're kind of like dogs.
I'm very skeptical of the fetching thing.
Do all Bengal cats fetch?
Yes, most do.
Almost all.
Yes.
All of my Bengal cats that I've had,
they've learned to fetch too.
This one wasn't fetching for the first half year
or year that I had her.
And then eventually she finds that one toy she
loves and then she likes Nerf guns.
Whenever you cock a Nerf gun, she's like
and she perks up and she goes looking
for the darts and chews them up and everything
like that. That's different
than fetching.
She fetches it. She brings it back.
Okay.
That's fetching.
What?
If I said my dog loves to fetch when i throw stuff he chews it up and ruins it oh she ruins the nerf gun like you can't use the nerf dark she
puts holes in it and the air the whole air compression thing doesn't work anymore so ah
so she basically ruins the whole nerf gun because who goes and buys more darts? You have to buy the darts when you buy the guns.
See, she and parents just...
If you're smart.
Yeah.
Like, I've bought Nerf guns as an adult,
and it's like, yeah, let's get 8,000 of these little rubber discs
because we're not picking them back up after we shoot them.
We had a crazy, like, Nerf war one time in a hotel.
We pissed everybody off.
It was 1 in the morning.
But we went to Walmart and got, like, eight Ner guns and we bought we had so many of those darts
you gotta buy extra as a kid i only had like the 12 that came with it and i'd lose those in a week
i yeah my nerf guns when we went to that walmart kyle's got when we got into a noodle fight land
sorry i'm gonna go off but like you you go to kyle's house right and you shoot stuff and
whatever and like shotgun shells are flying out and brass and stuff that the round was in.
And it's like, Kyle, what do you do with all these things that are flying?
He's like, yeah, that's just what gravel's made of around here.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You should see what the field...
I actually cleaned the field up before this last video shoot.
We dug a big hole with a backhoe
with an excavator and pushed all the TVs
and concrete blocks and crushed toilets
and everything into the hole.
Then I just made an even bigger mess.
Now there's a destroyed picket fence,
a bunch of burnt mannequins,
a destroyed Mercedes Benz
all burnt out and blown up.
Was the backhoe on the back of a tractor?
Where did you get a backhoe? You just literally
have like an excavator.
That. You have a dedicated
excavator for something?
It's in that paintball
video that we watched earlier. If you look on the
right side of the frame, you can see
the background. So,
that makes things easy when you can dig a big hole like that.
But right now, it's a
mess again. I took 8
toilets and I suspended them and made
like a gigantic wind chime type thing
like you know suspended in the air
and then I machine gunned them all
as people do as you do
and the whole valley is just full of like
splinters of porcelain that stuff just
breaks off and shoots everywhere it's a good time
we had a great week
yeah sounds like it I call it the world's
shittiest wind chime.
Did you guys see
the Amazon Dash thing?
Nope.
It's a
video. It's only
one minute long. Do you want to see it?
Sure, if it's interesting enough.
It's only 19 seconds.. If it's interesting enough. It's 4 minutes and 19 seconds.
I hope it's interesting enough.
They released it on
April 1st, so I thought it was
a joke at first, but now I'm told that it's
not. Are we sure?
Are we sure it's not a joke?
Comments are disabled for this video.
Makes a lot of sense, though.
Are you ready?
I'm ready.
Kat, are you ready?
Yes.
Ready, set, play.
I find this opening disgusting sound montage to be too long.
I'm already aggravated by it.
Where is this going?
Nope.
Fucking nowhere.
No, where's all my coffee cups?
Don't let running out ruin your life.
Who lives their life this way?
Oh my god.
Oh wow, this is ridiculous.
Oh my god.
This is such an absurd service.
Are we sure to reorder your phone?
This is not real.
You'll have kids ordering you 600 pounds of Olay.
Please, please, please, please.
They have a thing.
You can only order it once until it arrives.
And then the button works again. poppycock wow interesting prime members that i'm the only one who likes this idea well
here's the thing this is really taking laziness to an entirely new level because i like it dude
i've got the amazon app right here this is is how long it would take to order coffee. Like, it's literally like, all right, there's Amazon.
C-O-F-F-E-E.
All right, now I've got coffee.
It's done.
No, you didn't get the right coffee.
I don't need a designated.
You have a particular coffee Keurig thing that you want.
No, that ad should have been a guy sitting in the bathroom on the toilet,
and he reaches for the roll, and's nothing and it's spinning and then he just hits the Charmin button and waits.
For two days.
For two days.
For two days he waits for more Charmin with his shitty Amazon click account.
And then he does the poopy butt walk like.
Yeah, he does the shit shuffle right to the.
That's the poopy butt walk. yeah he does the front door right as he goes to the uh to the front door and grabs the sherman
but no like a lot of possibility i was thinking about like like so there's dollar shave club which
is a great job and they have a neat service but it's on a schedule and it's difficult for for you
to sort of tool out like we used to do it with dog food. We'd have dog food come, like, every six weeks.
And after a while, we had, like, two bags that had doubled up.
So we changed it to eight weeks.
And after a while, the dogs are, like, starving and it's not happening right.
And it's difficult to really, like, figure out the exact length of time that you need this.
The button, to me, beats the schedule.
Like, you know, when I, whatever, you know, rack up that last
blade, I want to hit the button and have
the new ones come. I don't know.
It just seems so silly
to me. I feel like I could just
when I need something from Amazon,
I feel like the button has
is, I've got the button
right here. Like, whenever I need something, I go to
Amazon on my phone, I instantly click,
I buy it with one click, and it's here in two to three days just like no matter what i run
around your house like a relay racer like i need this i want i want like a vertically oriented row
of these things in my pantry be like give me some mac and cheese give me some this give me some that
well they didn't even have that they suggested that your attention span was so low that if you had all the buttons together you'd forget about the tide by the time you got back
to the keurig button like they had to put the button right next to the item i only said what
about shut in alcoholics like a guy's laying there on his couch grasping for a button and
then it just shows like budweiser and he just hits it and that's that's the end of the ad enabled by amazon it's perfect for
shut-in alcoholics i cat what do you think on this good product bad product i mean i think we're in
the generation of of instant gratification so to have this is just that next step like having a
smartphone with all your apps and and being able to get to things faster and quicker, it's just that's kind of what's now and what's going to keep coming.
I want to be able to scan like a QR code without logging into my phone and have it ordered.
Just point it and go.
That's where it should be.
Well, eventually it's going to take a step of like chips in your brain that are going to be able to read.
I want one of those chips as soon as possible.
I'm first in line for one of those brain chips.
Really?
I want a memory chip.
Do you want to be the new adopter of that kind of strategy?
I want 100 terabytes up here.
I want to be able to add and remove information.
There was a show called Black Mirror,
and it's an English show.
I know that show.
It's a great show. That was an English show. I know that show. Oh, it's a great show.
That was an amazing show.
It's like Twilight episodes, but they had three episodes and only two seasons,
so six episodes total, and they're about an hour long.
And one of them, it's amazing, it's all about them having a chip that sees everything they see.
So let's say you come home, and you're like, hey, honey, I should see what I did today.
And they literally review, and it pops up just like a Chrome would,
and you see it on the TV, and it goes through everything they did that day and then the whole
episode's about like a couple and whether they're cheating and and the guy's jealous but he's like
kind of you know just getting all these ideas in his head the opening scene had a job interview
so the guy he did he had a job interview and then the the guy, like, the acting in that episode was so amazing.
Yeah.
Because they would watch it, and they'd really zone in on the subtleties.
The guy would be like, hey, this is really great.
I can't wait to see you again.
And then they'd just, like, keep playing that.
Like, hey, you did really great.
I can't wait to see you again.
Because he didn't do well, right?
He initially got, he only got an okay.
He was like, okay, well, thanks for coming in.
So that's why he kept reviewing it.
He's like, what did I do wrong?
So he kept looking through his own point of view to be like, did I say something?
And then he reviews it with his girl to be like,
what did I say?
What do you think of this?
And it was neat because they got to sort of like obsess over that.
And I kept zoning in on the acting
because the acting was so perfect
because they were obsessing over every little like eye crinkle and pause to get the full meaning from it.
And like it takes an extra like the next level acting to really get that kind of scrutiny.
And then, of course, the overall plot, like she said, was about a husband who thought the wife was unfaithful.
And they just they you know yeah they delete
what was in your head but then he would see her doing like show me right now show me what happened
and and it was it's pretty crazy stuff that everyone had one of these right so the guy was
like you know i don't even like having girls anymore i just got this great spank bank that
i refer to and then he's like oh wait a minute with that guy and my wife where this you know like two years ago he's doing that i heard the memories of that and yeah it um yeah and then
each episode had something really cool somebody said they were a famous person said they were
gonna take that and do a whole movie just based on that concept like make it a full-blown movie
so it's really cool that was already an hour-long episode So they were going to add 30 minutes more and then call it their own.
Like make it way up, way up.
They would show the actual embarrassing parts.
TV's better than movies now.
Like all the porn you were looking at and all that.
TV beats movies.
Hang on, I don't know about that.
That might change this year.
I think movies will beat TV in 2015.
I think you've got so many...
They're saying Twitch beats TV.
You've got so many cool movies coming out this year.
You've got Star Wars comes out.
We're doing opinion, not like metrics.
And you've got Age of Ultron coming out as well
and Ant-Man, which might be Marvel's first flop.
There's a lot of cool movies coming out this year.
Marvel's first flop.
This is part of your argument.
Well, I mean, if I'm being honest,
I think it might be
what happens on tv now there's so much more time right like the character development that happens
over a game of thrones or a better call saul or breaking bad just crushes what can happen in an
hour and a half on tell on in a movie now movies are the short form, underdeveloped, quick hits. And something like Better Call Saul, I just finished watching episode nine.
I won't spoil it.
But the entire first season is almost devoted to helping you get to know the players.
And not a ton happens happens.
You just get to really know these guys.
And even me, who really likes things to move quickly
has enjoyed this season you're not caught up on better call saul are you i haven't watched a
single episode i think it's going to be good and i will say this the production quality on it it
matches breaking bad like it's outstanding i'm about to get my dad hooked on uh game of thrones
i uh i took season one and put it on a thumb drive and I'm going to take it over there. I managed to find a
HD version, a really good
version, and I'm going to go put it on his 4K TV
we got him the other day. Kyle and I were just
comparing. We're both making it through. We think that we can
finish book three in
time. Oh yeah.
So right now it's
the second. So I've got what like
nine days
something like that until the event
starts or until the 12th it's 11 it's 10 10 days so and as you're right you're
right I am 33 hours 13 minutes and 16 seconds in the book number three with 47
hours and 32 minutes that's how long it is, yeah. So I'm 20 hours in, 20 hours, 9 minutes,
and I have 27 and a half hours to go.
I think I can do it.
It's a lot.
I made a lot of progress in the last week.
I probably did, well, shucks, almost 18 hours or something.
I forget.
I'm not sure.
You caught up to me a bit.
A little bit, yeah.
I thought I was going to caught up to me a bit a little bit yeah and you've been
i thought i was going to catch up to you a lot but you did not slack while i was i did like i
listened to a lot i listened a lot and sometimes somehow you caught up to me as well because i've
been driving back and forth constantly trying to film that fucking video uh let me just rant about
this for one second so i i had to i'm filming this paintball video yesterday i uh i started
filming it um i was supposed to film the day before yesterday but we ran out of
sunlight so I start yesterday and filming it myself with a tripod setting
up my own mics and everything my my Iraq veteran guys they had a funeral to go to
so I don't have anybody to help me film so I'm doing this thing by myself I get
the whole thing done I get back inside to edit and I realized I didn't hit record on the last scene of the video.
So the whole thing is ruined.
So I've got to go back and do the shooting part again.
So today, get everything set up, go out there, film this thing again,
and it's actually better the second time around.
It's kind of complicated to film because I've got my tripod.
Why is it better? You just hit your lines better?
Hit my lines better, and I had better targets to shoot at.
Okay.
So it went smoother and i so i've got the gopro camera and i've got the uh my tripod camera
and i got audio running from a lab mic so i get i film the video takes two or three hours get back
home uh start editing again and realize that uh something was wrong with my microphone and the
audio is just fucked so i drive all the way back again. It's like a 20 minute drive each time, film the whole video again. It takes another two or
three hours, get back home and the audio is still fucked up. So tomorrow I have to start for like
the fourth day in a row or something like that. And now I'm out of compressed air. So I've got
to drive 45 minutes, get compressed air, then 45 minutes back, then start filming. So it's,
am I ever going to keep up with you in this book it's a fucking nightmare yeah yeah with all that driving like you can't keep up because
because it's just been a day of uh fuck ups and driving mostly so when i use it you're using the
panasonic camera that you have yes can you it has two mic sources i assume yes i usually record with the shotgun and the lab at
the same time and if you can use the lab that's great you know because and it's you know it's
usually better if not then even the shotgun track you just mute it but it helps you line it up
i don't know whatever it's nice to have a backup like that. Yeah, I had them both set to the lab.
But I found
the problem right now. Something was wrong with the inputs.
I don't know what it was doing before, but
I spent a little time tweaking it, got it fixed.
So the audio's fixed. I just have to start
tomorrow for the third or fourth day in a row and
finally get this goddamn video done.
Because it's a video to promote
the event and...
There's only so much time. To show off the die dam.
I know.
Yeah, I got to get it up now.
Yeah.
Get people pre-registering for this thing.
Everyone's going to...
Have you pulled off the cartwheel matrix paintball kill yet?
Is that something that you're going to have on the weekend?
No, I don't think so.
I was trying to work on my balance.
It's just been a...
I've just been working too much.
I haven't been able to do my ballet training like I wanted to, my gymnastics.
I haven't been able to get out and do that.
No Krav Maga, paintball.
No.
I don't know if I'm going to be able to pull the cartwheel off anymore.
But I'll definitely be able to run pretty fast, so I'm looking forward to that.
I don't think I'll be tired by the time it's over.
I don't think I'll be sore by the time it's over i don't think i'll be sore by the time it's over so that's that's what i really wanted to accomplish
hmm yeah where can people buy that shirt because everyone's gonna want to know
my eyeballs um i got both of those shirts i actually got this on ebay and um there's a
company called black milk that does, like,
a lot of people buy them.
They're very expensive.
Once again, it's this expensive kind of clothing that's, like, over $100.
But I'm in the printing icon, a printing company where we do wide format printing,
sublimation dye, banners, business cards.
Our biggest thing is car wraps.
And so I know that when it comes to the material of making this clothing,
it's just sublimation dye on a nice silk.
So I actually found it on eBay for like eight bucks as opposed to buying it from Black Milk.
So sorry.
Sorry, Black Milk.
I'm sorry.
This actually came, if you can believe it or not, from fucking Walmart.
This is all Chinese labor here.
If you look carefully on the back, you can see tiny children's handprints because
that's how they get the dye in. They just rub it in
over there.
Are those genuine children's tears under
Cookie Monster's eyes?
Yeah, that's how you get this sort of organic look to the
dye coating. It's nothing
organic about it. That's child
tears and pain. Just rubbing it right in.
Well, there is something organic about it if it's
child tears, but we'll move past it.
Well, it depends how you
feed the children.
But yeah, they brought this back from
Walmart today, and I like it.
Well, it looks great.
I don't know if I feel frugal,
or feel bad for doing that, but
I found it. You just type in printed clothing on eBay, and you get everything you've seen on these other websites just for $8 or $10.
Oh, it's a solid.
Is that a full shirt or just a top half of a shirt?
No, it's just a crop top.
Because it's all about the waist-high skirts and stuff.
Now it's what's in.
Oh, is it?
Yeah.
And if they ask about this Zelda LED was also that was made by me with
the whole wide format printing thing i print out a sticker i uh turn it around i put led lights
all outlining it and then it's all battery operated so good luck buying that sounds like
a tremendous amount of work i won't have one of those it does uh cat do you watch game of thrones
at all do you watch uh game of thrones yeah yeah yeah yeah so you're all are you all caught up yeah i don't i don't but yeah i i watch
i watch each episode as i come out dude i saw i'm listening to book three and i never realized that
danny had a lesbian scene oh yeah that i can recall i i where was this in the shows that's I I was
thinking the same thing did you I didn't remember it yeah so they had the lesbian
scene in the show I remember cuz she was having sex with another woman that's how
you tell if it's a lesbian scene I don't remember that from the show I really
don't but I do it I'm not't I thought for sure I was retarded again
It was with her slave girl
I don't remember what her name was
They were both in the tub or something
They share a bed in the book
When they were in Koth
Koth
Koth
Is that where Carl Drogo is from?
It is not
Okay just checking I'll never let that one go Is that where Carl Drogo is from? It is not.
Okay, just checking.
I'll never let that one go.
That's one of the funniest name mistakes you've ever made.
I was so proud. You're like,
what was Daenerys' husband's name?
And I'm like,
Carl Drogo.
Drop the mic.
There's gotta be a Game of Thrones name game. There the mic. And it's not. There's gotta be a Game of Thrones
like name game.
There should be. You know what it needs
to be? It needs to be set up like Jeopardy is.
Like the categories are like
northern families.
I'll take
northern noble families
for 300 and it's like
this noble family is home to the great
John. That would be a fun game to play. That would be a good game. for 300 and it's you know like like this noble family is home to the great john and that would
be a fun game to play that would be a good game or we could just do it off of memory and be like
all right would he name the man with the long beard all of them yeah it's all that's all of
them they've all got a beard i uh after after i'm so i'm pretty deep in the books now i've gotten past the red wedding
i've gotten past um a couple you know winterfell is gone uh i've gotten past all that stuff so
i've got i think i've got more of an appreciation for all the stuff that's been cut to to to make
the shows i always heard the uh the the book readers say that they were happy with the way
the the tv show has
turned out but honestly i'm not i feel like they left a lot of the cool stuff out of the books
what do you wish they had included that like the biggest thing i wish uh the battles were uh
were all there or at least that there are some battles uh that the book that you're not present
for in the book if that makes sense it just happens and you're not present for in the book, if that makes sense. It just happens and you're not there.
You just kind of hear about it after the fact.
You're like, yeah, the battle went like this and like that.
They ran across the river and we pushed them back and blah, blah, blah.
And then there are battles where you're like there.
And it's like the vanguard is pushing around to the left and blah, blah, blah.
But there's plenty of those first-person viewpoint battles
that are just left out of the books.
And Tyrion's role in particular,
like, he's a badass in the book.
He's constantly riding a horse in the battle
with a fucking axe.
I don't know how many knights he's killed at this point
or, like, made to beg mercy.
Like, these, like, enormous knights that are famous
and Tyrion's out there three feet tall,
like, kicking their asses
and chopping heads and hands off and stuff.
And none of that's in there.
To give the show credit,
Various is better in the show than he is in the books, in my opinion.
You know, he's just more clever in there.
I'm sure his name's not Various, but whatever.
Well, it's Various.
Various.
It's not Various.
Yeah, you know.
There are various ways.
I say tomato. He's better in the book. Not to be confused with Viserys. V Varys. Varys. It's not Various. Yeah, you know. There are various ways. I say Tomato. He's better in the book.
Not to be confused with
Viserys. Viserys.
Who's Dany's dead brother
who got the melted crown port on his head.
Right?
I feel like his role
and his interactions with Littlefinger
are much better on the show
than they are in the book.
They're more concise in the show.
Because in the book, they'll talk for pages,
and it'll be a couple of witty lines
like they have in the show back and forth.
And then after a while, it's like,
all right, I can only watch these guys be snide
and condescending to each other for so long
before it's like, just have a real conversation.
They're very much alike.
They're kind of like polar opposites, though,
if that makes sense. They're like of like polar opposites though, if that makes sense.
Like ones that eat good and evil versions of each other.
Like Varys' motives are completely altruistic. He does everything for the realm.
Meanwhile, Littlefinger does everything for himself. Everything Littlefinger does is for personal gain.
If selling out the Lannisters is good for him, he'll do that.
If it's the Starks, he'll do that. Whatever it takes,
he's all personal gain. So, they're very
much alike, but completely different at the same time.
Do you really think Varys is all about the
realm? For the betterment
of the realm, yes.
The realm.
No, I don't know.
I don't know. I'm not giving away anything in the books,
because nothing else has been divulged that much
from where I've read up to.
He was originally a Targaryen man, right?
I don't know.
I'm only three books in,
so I guess we'll see. That's the good thing about this book.
For all I know, he's dead in the next
story. Book three has been good.
I've heard book four is hard to get through.
Book four is...
If it were twice as good,
it'd be half as good as the third book.
Wow.
Are we at an eight there?
It's because they... In the first three books, they rope you in
with all the same or at least similar
characters. There are some additions here and there,
but for the most part, it's the same cohesive
storyline of different people moving forward.
But in the fourth book, they add so many new people you just have a hard time giving a fuck like you're like i already have like 10 people on my draft list that i really have to care about
right now and you're trying to add more and i don't care and i already mentioned that i listened
to the beginning of that book on shuffle and so i got a bad impression so that could be it
okay i'm gonna go ahead and stick with that i i'm looking forward to it i've enjoyed the first
three immensely i've i've really uh like eaten my way through these things i listen to it for
hours every day and i never get tired of it and the scene i'm at right now is actually something
that was like i guess it's kind of a the calisehaleesi has been attacked by someone, and I don't know how it's going to end,
because it's not in the show.
So this is a brand new thing.
My enjoyment has been inverted bell curve.
It was high, it was low,
and then with three, I'm enjoying it again.
See, I told you, three is the best.
Corn!
Three is the best book.
Corn!
Fucking Raven.
All right, I have a new question.
Let's get Kat back in this.
Kat, are you listening?
Yeah, I'm here.
You have $500 to survive for a year
without going broke.
You have to have a penny left.
If you succeed, you get $10 million.
How do you survive on $500
for a year?
For a year?
Sugar daddy?
No.
That's the easy answer, right?
Is somebody else allowed to support you,
obviously, right?
I don't know. I instantly went to some sort of...
That option is not really in the cards for the rest of the
cast here.
I was about to say, yeah, I bet
Merkut would say the exact same thing.
I just find a sugar mommy.
Someone takes care of me, props me up.
They say no government help or anything.
So, yeah, I think sugar daddy, interesting you went right there.
But, yeah, no, I don't think that, I think in my head,
it was some sort of survivor man situation.
Like $500, all right, I'll dedicate like $100 to a tent,
some sort of of fishing rod,
sleeping bag,
and find a way to
not die for a year.
I'll need some warm clothes.
Live in the garage again. Live in the basement.
You know, good old...
Just go be homeless in
Miami for a while.
Live the dream.
Is that the dream?
They're saying some bums make more money.
If you're a bum out there
just collecting coins, you could still make money.
I just feel like
freelance work,
if you call it that, freelance not work,
is cheating.
That's against the rules in this game.
You have $500 to keep yourself alive
all this time.
That's a lot of ramen noodles.
Yeah.
But you're talking like in this setting,
like we're still in,
like if that were just to happen right now for me, right?
Like we're still in the setting,
like you could still call up your family or friends.
No, I'm saying you've got a little time to plan this out.
You know, let's say that you're going to start on Monday.
If populists just happen, then I only have $500.
Well, then money's not worth much.
But basically, there's no extraneous help that you can get.
So you can't be like, oh, I only have $500.
Take care of me, sugar daddy.
Or take care of me, mom and dad.
You've got to forge your own way.
I don't know about Woody's approach so far.
This is the top comment on Reddit, which kind of would make Cat's plans work.
Firstly, I go out for a really fancy meal.
Steak, maybe a bottle of red.
Spend $100 on that, I think.
Afterwards, I go to the pub and have a few beers.
Nice ones.
Maybe buy a fucker or two a drink.
Who knows?
I might be feeling good.
Treat myself to another meal.
Two meals in one night?
Whatever.
Fuck you.
I've just been given $500.
Then I would give the remaining money to any
homeless people I see on the streets
and save that last penny.
And to top the night off, I would mercilessly
beat the fucking cunt shit out
of someone so that I get enough for
a year in prison.
And that's his plan. Jesus.
That's a terrible plan.
That's a terrible plan.
It's awful bad words.
You want to go to jail?
No, no.
All right, so here's how you do it.
Oh, go on.
You want a tent.
You want a year's lot price for a campground,
like a camping spot to put your tent up in.
There's already like a brazier there,
to use Game of Thrones terminology,
you know, something to cook off of
and uh and so now all you need is uh is a little bit of wood and firewood shouldn't be too hard to
come up with and yeah and your rain and your ramen noodles and then go from there i would start by
buying literally like five or six hundred packs of ramen noodles you're gonna need at least that
many i'm thinking a tent, a sleeping bag,
a quality sleeping bag and probably a tent
to keep you warm and dry because you've got to survive.
A fishing rod, even though
they don't really produce
much food in my hands, but in theory
I could do something. And then
it might be worth
whatever it costs, even like $100
if someone who was
good at survival would help me.
Like, Woody, we're going to, you know, this is how you catch a fish.
This is how you find a bug in the ground.
You'd think finding a bug in the ground would be super easy, right?
I tried that when we were in Uari.
They're elusive.
Yeah.
All wildlife was elusive.
It was like they knew that there was a storm coming and, all the animals had fled that area like it was a disaster zone.
All the worms come to the surface when it rains.
They all went down deep below.
That's not true.
No.
The frogs came to the surface.
It wasn't raining yet.
Yeah, it wasn't raining yet.
We saw some frogs on the way out.
On the way out?
Yeah, I vomited twice on the way out just walking down the road, so I wasn't too yet. We saw some frogs on the way out. On the way out? Yeah, I vomited twice on the way out, just walking down the road.
So I wasn't too appetized by those.
That's no good answer to this.
But you guys are going by the approach that you have to go into a fucking Dick's Sporting Goods
and spend all $500 at once.
You can spread this out.
I don't think you need to immediately buy 500 packs of ramen
lest other homeless people rob you for it
You know just don't find their way under your under your camp. They will take the cash
We don't know if this in a bank account
Both I'm not gonna open a checking account with my
Can you not make money after having no that I don't think I can do I think can't make
Like make flappy bird and boom you're good to
go i think the the the spirit of the question is you you have to survive off this 500 for a year
not invest it into like cell phone games could i start my trek my five so i can buy a plane ticket
with regular my money and then i start the 500 quest somewhere else because I would move to like
Somalia and then
be a king for a year with money
to spare. Bring me
six goats. Here's a nickel.
Like whatever.
You get some concubines going? Yeah.
I don't know if Somalia. I think I'd go
like rainforest South American
type thing where there's just like bananas and
coconuts hanging for free.
Is that how you imagine it?
Like Gilligan's Island or something?
Yeah, the professor will whip us up some Mai Tais.
I don't think it works that way.
I think you'd be more likely...
After he's done with the time machine and the radio.
Six weeks later, he's been kidnapped
by, like, some drug cartel.
I'm telling you, there's coconuts everywhere.
The bananas thing, I've never actually seen bananas hanging in the thing, but there's definitely coconuts. I always heard that there's
like, you know, those tarantulas will hide inside of the bananas. So those guys will be walking
around lugging a big thing of bananas on their shoulders and the spiders will come out and bite
them in the fucking jugular. That sounds awful. My papa told me the story about this guy that he was,
he was picking bananas. Your papa? Were you in France the time me papa my papa i called him when i was little i called him papa i was five whatever his papa
you're so gay at five carry on papa tell me the story so uh papa told me this story about this
guy he was picking the bananas and the spider bit him on the hand and immediately he like went down
to the ground pulled his banana machete and lopped off
his own his own uh hand up to the wrist to to prevent uh this uh the spider bite from killing
him little extreme yeah you would think so right like i think what you want to suck the poison out
first maybe just try to take a finger he just went i would see it clear enough to know, so he wasn't like, ah, fuck it, it was a B.
You win some, you lose some.
Yeah, they talked about his children.
They were so poor that they would take a stick and put some bubble gum on it
and stick it down the tarantulas hole and try
to catch the tarantulas with it so they could
sell them in town.
They were tarantula salesmen
as children. Tarantula salesmen as children
tarantula salesmen yeah yeah they go into town with you know some tarantulas and sell them
step right up i could use the tarantula salesman i was so when we were trying when we're thinking
about doing that bug fight thing i was so freaked out by those websites where you order the the big
giant bugs.
I just imagine the packages that must show up in and the thought
that maybe there's packages everywhere
just full of those horrible bugs floating
around with my regular mail and
the possibility that a sand scorpion
or one of those sand spiders or whatever the fuck they are
could weasel its way into my next
UPS package.
On the plus side, you can get an Amazon Plus button
for when you need more tarantulas.
So Kat, your Twitch channel's booming.
You're making some money.
What's your plan into adulthood with this thing?
You're going to buy a house free and clear
and then just lower your expenses for life?
You're rocking your 401k.
What are you doing with your influx of success?
Oh, man, I invest my money into the strangest things.
That's why I said co-owning a printing thing
is probably the smartest investment with that.
Is it making money, the printing thing?
Oh, it's insane.
We got a building off the freeway,
so we have very good advertisements.
And the biggest thing is car wraps
because they're very expensive to take care of cars and like we do color changes for toyota we have clients
too around here that are like toyota and stuff that help pay off the bills how long does a car
wrap last forever forever you gotta take it off with a heat gun it's pretty i mean you know you
could scratch it and stuff but it's it's at least five years good before you even have to care.
I mean, it depends on the installers and the quality.
There's so many different types of applications when it comes to the wrap itself.
But, like, you know, like, even speaking of Bieber,
he did a Chrome change on his car for, like, 10 Gs,
and he changed the whole car chrome so what's nice about car
wraps is you can essentially make it anything whether it's like an illusion type graphic that's
like peeling off the side of the paint or just a whole color change but we did like a matte sheen
black color change for toyota and so having clients like that really helped but when i won
the 100 grand like four years ago i invested invested it into a massive RC track for remote control 10th scale cars.
And I made like 150 foot by 80 foot big.
I bought a Bobcat because, of course, I can't move the dirt myself.
So I bought a Bobcat to not the meow, you know, but like the earth movers.
I'm well familiar with the Bobcat.
Oh, God, the feline. All right. No, not the feline. No, they earth i'm well familiar with the bob kecko the feline
all right no not the feline no they don't really do well when it comes to dirt uh so yeah i dug
we actually it was me and my dad and an rc expert that came together and we dug it 10 feet deep
we had a 40 foot driver's stand. We all built and it had elevation changes
because that's very, so it's like a big
dome, like a big bowl.
So you won $100,000 and you invested
it into RC car racing.
Did that work out?
I, um,
Is that the answer?
It was a lot of fun.
It was for fun. That's what I'm saying.
When it comes to me investing, this is why
I'm very fortunate to have
gaming. Was there any return on
this RC track?
No.
I mean, it depends on what you want in return.
If you're looking for
money, no.
But there was a hell of a lot of fun.
Do you still maintain the track? no there it's definitely got a few
weeds on it but it would only take a day you just take a day you could go out there and because
over winter it's it gets i live here in the high desert we're about 3 000 feet above sea level so
we get high winds um i'm still in southern california so we do get the nice weather but
we do get like 30 to 40 mile an hour winds, which has gotten me also into stunt kites.
So I'm like very much a hobby enthusiast and I'm all over the place when it comes to that.
So do you have a lot of stunt kite investments as well?
Yeah.
There's like, I have like $120 kite.
That's like.
What does a stunt kite entail?
What kind of stunts do these kites do?
They're actually, they do have competitions for stunt kites as well.
But my brother was a competitive stunt kite flyer.
It's true.
He's told the story a thousand times.
That's not true.
I've never told the story before, I don't think.
But yeah, he used to work at a store called Air Circus.
And they got him into stunt kite flying.
And he would compete and do his thing.
And I was little.
And the kites pulled so hard, you'd go behind them like you were on skis.
And I was on Ocean City at the beach, and there were jetties.
And the jetties, like no human could jump over these jetties.
But while you're holding a stunt kite, you could.
And you just, like, it was cool.
Dan boils all sorts of things for that kind of stuff.
You're doing something, so like you're holding on to it.
Yeah.
I was picturing guys going out there with headbands for no reason
and knee pads and then just like...
What is a stunt kite? I need to Google this.
Do you want to do this, Kat? Do you want me to go?
Yeah, here. I'm going to actually link you guys to a photo of my track
that I was just talking about.
We did host races there.
We did have a bunch of my track that i was just talking about um we did host races there like we did have a bunch of people local people that would come around as you can see
there's about like i don't know maybe seven guys standing there uh with like first to third uh
place plaques and printing out the lap times we had transponders that go on the cars to give you
lap times this track is amazing i wish somebody would invest in shit i like yeah that looks like mario kart level five
oh they do have that like i always wanted to find a way same thing with paintballing i'm like okay
gaming and doing my hobby like i always try to find ways of bringing them together
so like when it came to paintballing like somebody needs to recreate maps
from like call of duty so you can run around on the same maps and play paintball.
And the same thing with like RC.
The only, the best thing you can come up with
for Mario Kart and RC
is you put a needle on the front of your car
and you have balloons on the back of the other cars
and you have to go and try and pop
the other people's balloons.
But the only Mario Kart I could find within that.
So with a Stun Kite,
you have two handles typically you can't have a
bar that goes back and forth but mine always had like two hand grips and you
just sort of pull them like this and this I'm not getting on camera right and
and it would make the kite turn left and right and with that you can start doing
a bunch of loops or you know fly over the sky. Here's a link for that.
These kites like even the guy this kite that he's using're they're upwards of like anywhere between 100 and you can get ones
that are like 500 they get expensive for the material fiberglass all that stuff they get big
too yeah oh yeah they get huge so just looking at this one that one's really really agile there
are other ones that are they have like no frame they almost look like parachutes and and uh there's
there's different kinds but have 11 foot wingspan.
There's some pretty big ones out there.
That looks cool.
I've got a Stunt Kite upstairs.
Oh, really? Do you really?
Do you get
high winds where you live? I bought it
at the beach. I don't fly it all the time.
I get winds actually where I'm moving
to, but here there's not enough space.
You mentioned paintball fields like Call of Duty maps
I sent you a link there the place that we're actually
going to to play paintball has recreated
Nuketown
so it's exactly
it's exactly how it would be in the
game that's so cool
that's so cool
still terrible spawns
and there's still going to be a lot of spawn camping That's so cool. Yeah. Exactly. Still terrible spawns.
And there's still going to be a lot of spawn camping.
Oh, yeah.
It's such a huge investment to do that kind of stuff, too.
Playing or building a field like that?
Just building a field like that.
I mean, I live out here in the desert.
We got all sorts of acreage that you could do that stuff on, but you'd be spending well over like 50 to 100 grand
just trying to build something like that.
And then to get people to come by and, I mean,
then you'd have to have insurance on your property just for the dummies
that are like, I'm going to fall off the second story of this house.
Oh, yeah, definitely so.
That would happen.
Yeah, it would.
Because you can do it in game, so why not try it in real life?
I was looking into making myself a silencer for my paintball gun,
and the more I dug into it, the more I came to realize
it's pretty much fucking impossible, because here's the problem.
Apparently, paintball silencers are viewed by the ATF
just like gun silencers,
so they fall under all the same laws and provisions and stuff,
which wouldn't stop me, because I've got an SOT and everything.
I can still make my own silencer.
I would just make a 68 caliber one.
But then on top of that, apparently it's in the insurance form,
like the liability insurance at paintball fields.
Like for some reason, a standard clause in there prevents the use of silencers
on paintball guns on the field.
So even if I made my own and went through that process,
I still couldn't shoot with it at paintball fields.
Well, that's a bummer.
Yeah.
I really wanted to do that because I've never seen a real one before because,
you know, you get a $200 tax stamp and all that stuff.
Hmm.
So Kat, have you,
have you turned your fame into any investments that do work
or is it all stunt kites and aside from the printing thing um not necessarily because
even when it comes down to competitive gaming this is why twitch to me is like twitch's love
twitch's life in this sense because uh when it came to competitive gaming, it's your job, it's a full time job
and we're just not there yet to have it like when it comes to sports, you can retire off
of what you make when you get into like basketball, right? If you get that good, you can literally
get funding and get through a whole bunch of different rankings of being able to support
yourself through that. But unfortunately with gaming, we're getting there.
There's million-dollar tournaments that are happening.
There are League of Legends teams that are being supported by the companies.
They get driven everywhere.
They have houses where they just sit and play all day,
which is mainly League of Legends, which is kind of the bar right now.
And I've been a part of a lot of these other investments where people try to make that same similar setting.
I was part of Championship Gaming Series where they try to make it so teams all play together different games and then we were
drafted at the playboy mansion and it was all this different type of sports influenced video gaming
and essentially that that went under as well which game was it uh it was championship gaming series
they actually had counter-strike uh project anthem
racing which turned into forza uh they had fifa they had uh dead or alive which i represented
for fighting games so it this lead would to do well would a gamer have to be good at every game
or was it like well yeah it was an interesting league setting where you would go against the
other team uh they had lights and cameras and everything.
It was really bizarre because I was only 19. So it was about seven or so years ago. And they give
you a stipend. You would have like extra money. We lived in apartments, like 60 people, all the
same age to like being paid. We got a salary, we got a yearly salary to do it.
And it was the two teams that would go off against each other. And depending on how well
the Counter-Strike team did, if they bombed, then you would have to make up those points.
So like in Dead or Alive, for instance, we had five points total, like one round each.
And depending on how well you did in those rounds, that would go towards your overall
accumulated score
for that game.
So like for the racing game, it would be if you got first, you got eight.
If you got second, you got five.
So there was even like in the racing game, it was 2v2 and it would be all about blocking
and kind of making your way to finishing and also helping your teammate finish for points.
Same thing in FIFA, it all counted towards it.
Like Counter-Strike was the worst because if your team bombed, there was 18 points for the terrorist and counter-terrorist setting they have in Counter-Strike
so yeah some of the time you would just feel totally demoralized when your Counter-Strike
team bombed but then other other times you just be like I don't even have to get five points I'm
fine so why do you think Counter-Strike is so much more popular competitively than COD because I
I think I'm not sure on this that COD is still a more popular gamely than COD? Because I think, I'm not sure on this, that COD is still a more popular game,
but the competitive environment for CSGO
is way bigger, I think.
I have a theory that the problem with console shooters,
or just shooters in general,
is that they change too frequently
in the overall game.
So, like, Call of Duty, first of all, the companies have changed.
Like it used to be Infinity Ward, now it's Treyarch.
And then a lot of the companies behind it sometimes drop it or split up
and there's all different people working on it.
There's three now.
So it's Infinity Ward, Treyarch, and Sledgehammer.
And they just every third year, they go again.
Yep, pretty much much and so not
only do you divide the community once that's happened because now you have people like I like
because for me I don't I don't personally care for advanced warfare I think it's changed way
too much the whole game the whole dashing setting and everything like that I preferred Call of Duty
4 Modern Warfare 1 and 2 I thought those were the best Call of Duties.
I played those every day, all day.
But that was Infinity Ward, and they're no longer,
they're now known as Respawn, working for EA.
So these companies themselves,
they have to make a game that's worth $60 in selling.
This is why I think League of Legends has the bar right now,
because they're free to play,
and they make so much money from character skins,
from having different ways of making microtransactions
that they're not dealing with the same problems
that a company like Call of Duty is dealing with.
So Counter-Strike, they still have Dust 2
and maps that you've played years ago on 1.6
or whatever variation you've played.
So I would hope that some of these,
even Halo has done the same thing.
You play Halo 1, it's
nothing like Halo 4 or
ODST or any other
shooter in that sense. So they just change too much
and I think that divides the community. Gears of War
did the same thing. Sledgehammer
did the last one as well instead of Epic Games.
So it just divides.
Yep. And they have to make a
game too, I feel for them, because they have to make a game that's worth 60 bucks. They have to change the maps's they have to make a game too i i feel for them because they have to make a game
that's worth 60 bucks they have to change the maps they have to add different you know strategies
otherwise people bitch up a storm about how this is the same game why do i want to buy it yeah it's
interesting you say it changes too much because it prior to this year the complaint was always it
was just re-skinned right and that's not really true like the way that you pick your classes has changed pretty dramatically over the years um you know
i don't know the weapon balance has gotten better and and people i think just remember the old games
more fondly than they deserve to be yeah it's all rose-colored glasses for the most part oh yeah
absolutely if you go back to call of duty if they release call of duty 4 right now for the first
time and for some reason people weren't all like, these graphics suck, and they were just talking about the gameplay,
everyone would throw a fucking shit fit about the M16 and the silenced MP5.
Everyone would throw a fit.
Frag times three.
Frag times three.
Oh, it's a use.
Frag times three.
It's so gay.
Everybody would freak out.
Stopping power, right?
Stopping power.
The second tier, you would almost never run anything but stopping power,
with the exception of maybe Juggernaut P90.
And, you know, like you just,
every one of my classes had stopping power on it just about,
and, you know, that was just the thing.
So, yeah.
In the good old days when the game was perfect in 2009,
Call of Duty 4 for Life. It was just perfectly balanced.
There were no issues.
We were just talking about rose-colored glasses.
It was a 7.
All time.
That game needed
three minor fixes, and it
really was perfect, in my opinion.
I wish it had lived on the way
Counter-Strike has. I wish they
had done with COD 4 what they've done with Counter-Strike.
And just over the years, it's evolved and gotten better and changed.
And I wish COD 4 had been the same thing.
Hmm.
That's exactly kind of what I was saying.
It's like just enhanced but not changed.
But I think it's just the play method of whether it's free-to-play
or whether it's the $60 and having to change it.
That cup is awesome.
Thank you.
Thank you.
How did you get it?
I made it.
You made a cup?
Yeah.
Is that a sticker on a cup?
A little screen printing thing.
It's permanent.
I mean, you wrap cars.
Kyle wraps cups.
One and the same.
Yeah, whatever.
Oh, I wanted to ask you about
that so how much how much does it cost to wrap a car and i know you're gonna say it depends on the
car so like i've got a camaro for example what would it cost to do that uh just a color change
basically yeah like what if i walk on the roof
it depends like if you're going just for color change, it can be anywhere from $15,000 to $2,000.
I think it'd be cool if it were matte black.
Yeah, we just did that satin black for a brand new Toyota Camry.
And that cost, that's about $1,400 to $2,000, depending on the length of what you need.
And it depends, also, the main point for me is the price of the material.
So I've got... I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to interrupt you.
No, go ahead.
I was just going to say I've got vehicle decisions to make in like the next year or so.
Because there's two ways I could go about this.
I'm thinking...
So last time around, I wanted a new sports car.
But it was actually between getting a new Camaro and building myself like a 69 Camaro from a kit car and I let my dad sway me
to the new one because he was like you know the you want a tooth that you want
a 2012 air conditioning system and a 2012 navigation and engine and it's
setter it's really like all the creature he mentioned all the creature comforts
and I was like yeah yeah you're absolutely right so I got a new one this next time around i think what i would like to do because my dad's
been restoring a lot of cars um uh lately now are you thinking of swapping cars or adding one to the
stable so that's part of it so here's what i'm thinking i could um i could get rid of my current
camaro i could get rid of my current camaro i could get
rid of my current truck which right now needs transmission work and i just don't even want to
do it because i feel like it's going to break again that truck's such a just fix the transmission i
know it's i've spent five thousand dollars just on the tranny have you considered hiring someone
competent did you get my general contractor to work on your car maybe maybe like beating on it
with a hammer here's a fast forward
mode of what happened to my truck i i thought i was getting a great deal i bought a car that had
water damage so it had a salvage title i bought this like 2008 um uh four-door chevrolet pickup
truck uh four-wheel drive um is this silver truck silver yeah. I bought it for like $14,000 with 45,000 miles on it.
And this was like two or three years ago.
So it was a very good deal.
And he swayed me away from thinking there was any water damage
because I took it and got it checked out by a dealership.
And he had documentation of like $7,500 worth of work he had done
to fix any possible water damage,
which included a new wiring harness and a few other
things.
Apparently,
the fluid
came out of the transfer case.
The transfer case had no lubrication
inside of it, and I drove to Chicago and back
hauling a
golf cart on the back the whole way without
any fluid, and it ground itself apart
and caused a huge issue.
So I took it to a Chevrolet dealership.
They couldn't fix it.
That cost me $1,500.
Took it to a mechanic who has his own shop at his place.
That cost me $2,000.
I got a new transfer case put in and a used transmission
with roughly the same mileage as the truck already had on it,
which seemed like a fair deal.
I didn't
have a problem with the used transmission um he didn't put any goddamn fluid in my new transfer
case so it did the same thing again so it's sitting out there right now and i'm still pissed
off at it here's what i would like to happen though i'm thinking maybe this time around a new
truck but a classic car like maybe my dad's got a 67 camaro he wants to sell it's a 67 rs uh
um what do you call it hang on i'm gonna i'll grab a picture just a second you're gonna go
for another camaro you don't want to try something new or a corvette you know something like that a
challenger uh um have you seen the new stingray Corvette Stingray that just came out?
I want an old car though.
I want a classic car.
That's what I think.
I think this time around... So you're thinking a new truck, but an old car.
Exactly.
Which one do you think will get the miles?
Both.
I don't know.
It's hard to say.
So this...
That looks really cool yeah that's the 67 camaro dad just
put together it's about 85 done there's still a few little minor things to do but
there's that one he's also restoring a chevelle so i could get either one of those from him
uh really cheap i'm sure but i think i want new truck. What does he do for a paint booth?
He seals off one room of his shop completely and puts air filters on everything.
And then he goes in like an hour before he's going to paint.
He waits until it's a day where the humidity is right and there's not winds and lots of dust.
Preferably like after it's rained and then dry it out and then
he'll spray the entire uh side of that shop with water so that if there is any dust sitting on
anything it gets washed away and then they paint in there and he gets really good results and the
good thing about painting is it's only it only matters if there's dirt or swirls or anything in
the paint on the last coat really as long as you don't have some runs in the
Paint it's that last
Coat of clear that really matters so if a fly gets in it you just sand everything down with some really low grit sandpaper and
Clear it again
Another another fly got in it start over again
And you can just keep doing that until you've got I don't know eight ten layers of clear on there
It starts looking like candy then and you get the perfect coat and you're good.
Yeah.
That sounds cool.
So, new truck, what would you get?
I would definitely get a...
It's hard to say.
It would be Chevrolet or Ford just because I like the way they look.
And I think I would get like a 1500 series truck.
I wouldn't want a big one.
And I wouldn't want a diesel. and I wouldn't want a diesel,
but I would like to be able to,
uh,
haul my stuff around.
I definitely want to get four,
four full size adults and comfortably.
And,
you know,
I like,
I like creature comforts and big motors.
So I'd want all that stuff too.
So,
you know,
it's like a $45,000 vehicle,
I suppose in the law,
in the,
in the,
in the long run,
but Chevrolet or Ford,
I've been leaning towards a 2500 Dodge lately.
Like if I had to pick right now.
Are you wagging or something?
What's it called?
The Power Wagon.
Power Wagon.
Yes, it makes your penis longer.
I just imagine like five guys in a group being like,
hey, you guys want to just pile in one car and go?
And I'm like, yeah, well, where are we going to go?
And Woody's being like,
let's go in the motherfucking power wagon.
We're not supposed to go this way.
This isn't a road.
It is now.
My current truck is so off-road capable that my driving style has evolved into just like bumping into shit.
Like I don't give a fuck.
And like,
you know,
if there's like the big drainage gullies and stuff and off-road,
I just sort of go down and back up them.
If there's a, you know, when you park,
there's like that little portable curb thing.
I don't know what they're called.
If I want to go forward over that, I do.
What is it called?
Like a curb stop or something like that.
That works, you know, in a parking lot.
I'll just drive over that if I choose to.
I had to drive over one the other day,
and I was glad that I was in a four had to drive over one the other day and i was
glad that i was in a four-wheel drive truck i uh i pulled into this parking space there's cars on
either side of me um and there was a space behind me as well but it was vacant so i pulled straight
into mine and then somebody pulled into that parking space that was behind me and i was
literally just blocked in there was no way to turn no matter how i cut the wheels i couldn't
get out without hitting his car in it and it happened to be like a nice Camaro, too, so I didn't know what to do.
So I just put it in four-wheel drive and drove over that grass and made a loop.
If you drive a car and you need to make a U-turn, you usually can.
If you drive a truck, you'll hit the curb.
And you don't want to be doing a K-turn on a road, you know,
where there's any traffic.
So the right tire just sort of goes up the curb and back down.
You can't do that with every full like there are street trucks now that have spoilers or running boards or things like
that that could cause trouble and i don't want that yeah like the a lot of them have like it's
almost like a body kit it's there's a lot of plastic and fragile stuff down there that'll
just shatter if you hit a ditch at the right angle that's not for me yeah even on uh that uh that 2002 chevrolet that's out there right now the uh the front piece
of plastic on the left side of the bumper is like dangling on it now because something happened
where i was like fuck it going in the ditch and then you know it hit it but had you had a power
wagon you wouldn't hit a damn thing i i don know. I go on some real adventures in my truck sometimes.
I don't want to exaggerate about the jump I used to make in my F-150 Lightning.
It was something worthy of a film.
It was like some Duke Boy shit.
It was like the Dukes of Hazzard.
The road was going flat for a long way
so you could get up to speed and then there were railroad
tracks and instead of it being like
a gradual
incline like a sort of a
hump, they just made a mound
where the railroad tracks were. I guess they were
cheap. So you came out of nowhere
and then immediately went up like a ramp
that dropped off on the other
side and I would hit that thing going 60 miles an hour and we would get almost a full second of air time
and it was like oh fuck yeah that was crazy and the other guy i would never warn the other person
so if they didn't have their seat belt on their head would hit the roof dude my grandmother good
friend my grandmother used to do that we used friend. My grandmother used to do that.
It was the same situation.
There was a railroad track and a road that went by it, and the hump was just too
extreme. And as a kid, we called it
the Jersey Bump. It was somewhere in Gloucester.
And my grandmother
would hit that thing so hard in a
station wagon. This is like a full-on
1970s, gigantic
boxy station wagon like like out of um
american vacation with the griswold someone helped me with this national lampoon vacation
yeah so they take the freaking like that super truck station wagon thing and she would rock that
like kyle did it like 60 miles and we would beg her to she did it once like Kyle did it, like 60 miles. And we would beg her to. She did it once or twice.
Then it was like, hit the jersey bump, hit the jersey bump.
And she would do it and she would hit it hard.
Good old grandma.
Dead now.
Memories.
So where do we go from here, boys and girls?
So apparently the whole Iran nuclear system...
You're buying a foreign car next?
Oh, yeah.
I'm not buying another Chrysler Jeep Dodge product ever again.
You're going to be some douchebag riding around your Saab?
No, not going to drive a Saab.
Or an Audi.
A Toyota Prelude?
I would love an Audi.
It's a Honda Prelude, isn't it?
I think Audis look pretty sweet
i don't think i want one they have quite a few electrical problems i like the like the sporty
version of like the a4 whatever that thing's really cool so what what foreign car are you
looking for you're you're talking about civic accord stuff like that aren't you no i want an
suv next so i'm just trying to push cayenne that that's a that's a cool one.
No.
I don't want that.
I want something like
I don't know. Here in Woody you talk about how much
you can beat to shit his Tacoma.
I've been looking at
Toyotas and
I've heard good reviews on the 4Runner.
Apparently you can beat that
thing to shit and it'll come back asking for more.
Which one is it? The 4Runner? The forerunner my wife has a forerunner and she's a horrible driver and
it's fine oh that's excellent i can vouch for her horrible drive kyle's driven a total of like 20
minutes with my wife and there's been one accident yeah it was interesting like i was in the back seat and i was kind of like kind of like
shifted over so i was like the third head in the middle kind of kind of just enjoying the show
and seeing seeing how woody interacts with his wife which was which was cool so they're trying
to navigate around town and neither one of them are very good at it and they're both they're both
like sort of mocking the other one i think maybe, maybe because I'm there, about the other one being the problem.
Like, ha, you can never do this sort of thing, Woody.
And Woody's like, I told you right here's where to go.
I was loving it.
We went 15 minutes from their house and got lost going to a steakhouse.
It was like 15 minutes.
There's nothing within 15 minutes of my house that i don't know like the back of my
hand but it's like they they work from home so yeah their surroundings are like new to them every
time they go out my contractors are doing this now they're like woody do you know where this is
i'm like no well do you know where that is is it outside because if it's outside i don't know where
it is i have no idea but anyway and that that quality of yours has
always scared me uh whenever we talked about like doing survival type situations and someone would
suggest something really hardcore where our lives might actually be in danger and i'm thinking like
what if we get lost what what if woody has to navigate that's oh no yeah i'm just imagining
compass looking at the sun woody's looking at the moss on a Yeah. I'm just imagining Compass looking at the sun.
Woody's looking at the moss on a tree.
And I'm just like, maybe I should just cut my jugular.
Maybe I should just use this.
This sog knife is so goddamn sharp.
I could end it all.
Dude, my wife has started doing this new thing where she kisses me on the jugular.
But it's not all wet.
But it's a long jugular kiss.
And it's like, I don't even like that.
Like, I gotta get an aneurysm from this shit.
She just, like, comes in and half chokes me for a second.
She's trying to suck a clot loose.
Get all that YouTube money.
And I'm just like, honey, like, I'm not really digging the jugular kiss thing.
And she's like, stop being such a pansy.
So, that's a little insight. Getting these jugular kisses, I'm not digging's like stop being such a pansy so but that's a little
insight getting these jugular kisses i'm not digging it calls you a pansy uh something like
that yeah i was being maybe a sissy i don't know ms cleaver leave it to beaver home you have
she's coming up behind you with her apron kissing you don't be such a pansy
husband dearest these are jugular kisses they're not to
be fucked with yeah that's risky what he's what he's what he's family life over there it really
is something to behold i when i stayed there for a day or two i was like yeah i could move in here
this would be fun this would be a lot like a sitcom this is pretty cool colin got glasses
i saw that yeah he um he's only gonna wear them for two months. I have the same
issue. So I have double vision. And at first, I didn't realize that everyone's vision was this
way. But I kind of have to focus to pull the two images into sync. Whereas I think other people
maybe just do this naturally. I don't know. I've only ever been me. And Colin has that too. So like,
but sometimes images like especially if you focus
from near to far or have to switch it's an issue and it was showing up in his reading like it was
kind of like an impairment he was having it was more work for him to track than other people
and uh we took him to the eye doctor and this and that and so basically he's wearing glasses for the
next two months and um a lot of them is like a prison almost prism where you kind
of look through it and then it straightens it out and uh apparently if he wears that for a couple
months it will train his eyes to work properly and such and if it works for him they want me
to wear glasses for a couple of months so we'll see how this goes all i know is i'd love for you
to have to wear glasses for a couple of months well don't you already have glasses
though right because you'd look goofy with them i would look awesome with them don't you already
have some glasses i i have reading glasses um yeah i think it's actually the double vision thing but
the the issue i had was that if i read for a long time specifically like working with a computer
monitor all day i would get headaches and fatigue I think more so than average people, like normal people would.
So I got some reading glasses, but they just turned into a different thing.
It went from eye fatigue to like, I suck at wearing glasses.
I didn't realize this was a skill, but I don't like, I'm not happy unless they're like fully
up high and on my eyes.
But then that ends up like squeezing my nose mega hard.
And I just could never
really find that balance oh hey remember when you were talking about your heart rate going to 250
beats per minute a while back i was watching this documentary on netflix about uh when the
u.s beat the soviet hockey team like the miracle on ice or whatever and it's really good if you
haven't seen it uh but they talk about uh it's like 30 for 30 or no
they get a russian guy right and he goes to the they interview a bunch of russian people it's
like almost from the russian perspective right it is from the russian perspective and um it's it
they start off with like how the russian hockey team formed and and how this guy was the mastermind
and how he like uh he was he was plotting out how the russians would play he basically invented a new way of playing hockey um and uh and how they were victorious and how they
played the canadians and the canadians were really dirty and uh and they're in their uh series and
like slashed the russians best player breaking his ankle and uh but they were talking about the
training uh and this russian guy's talking about when they uh had to train in the summer when there
was no fucking ice to skate on he's like he would make us go to beach and we would
take rocks and put them in the ocean and then we would take them out of the ocean
and pile them on the beach and we would do it all again and this is what we did
straight training showed him like with these boulders like juggling like just That sounds awful. The fundamentals of hockey. It was strength training.
It showed him with these boulders,
juggling, just kind of lobbing them around
to control the weight.
Just weight training, basically.
And one guy was like,
Rocky IV style.
Sometimes heart rates would go to 250 beats per minute.
It was extreme.
And I just kept waiting for him to be like,
one in four died.
It was so extreme the way the Russians trained
and played hockey
and the way their whole team was set up.
I actually haven't finished the whole thing.
I'm looking forward to getting the part where they lose
and hearing these guys.
It's on Netflix.
I saw it.
It's excellent.
I'm going to watch this.
You might like it.
What was I going to say?
I would definitely like that. Oh, Merkerker maybe you can help me with my history here someone was telling me about it
the russian team played every nhl team did that happen at one point or did they just play because
the documentary didn't say that the flyers is the russian team played the flyers and the flyers were
so dirty so wait wait just start like Before we go there, wait, wait.
So they didn't play the Flyers first.
They played a couple other NHL teams, and they beat every one of them, right?
And then they finally get to Philadelphia against the Broad Street Bullies,
and they had a completely different style of hockey.
They were just beating the—
Yeah, fighting.
It was just fighting.
Yeah, and when you interview the Russians,
like when the Russians talk about the fighting,
they're like,
we didn't come there to fight.
We came there to play hockey.
And they keep showing these shitty-ass Canadian hockey players,
like, hitting them in the back of the head,
like, hard, like, hitting them,
slashing them in the head with sticks and stuff,
like, extreme fouls.
And the Russians will just hate it.
That was my team.
They just turn the other cheek every time.
Like, they're like, we can't just play hockey. When they my team. They just turn the other cheek every time. Pussies.
We can't just play hockey.
When they played the Flyers, the Philadelphia Flyers,
I believe they actually just left the ice for a while
because they were like, this isn't even hockey.
We're not even playing.
No one's trying to score.
We're just sending our good players out there,
and then it's just three guys throwing their gloves down
and just going at it for no reason.
They were beating the
crap out of but it was like within the rules but they were like or outside the rules but like it
wasn't like the refs were on the flyer side or anything they're just like we think that
intimidating this player is knocking him off his game and they're not nearly the team they were
otherwise that's the great thing about hockey is it's the one sport where when two grown really
physically capable
adult athletes standing on razor blades
on one of the hardest surfaces known to man
holding weapons, they go, you know what?
Let's just let it happen.
Let this happen for a bit and see how this
pans out. Oh, hockey is so great.
Here's what I think
the next logical evolution
of sport is going with
the mentality that hockey has.
And I'd like to imagine it transferred to baseball.
So imagine it's sort of...
Like a fat fuck struggling?
So some of your baseball players would always have to be on defense
because here's the wild card.
You'd have one man on your roster who was like a fucking assassin,
and he'd try to sneak over to the enemy dugout.
You got like a Yankee trying to, like, army army crawling through the stands making a circle around home plate army crawling
low so nobody sees him trying to get in the red socks dugout he gets in there he's going nuts
trying trying to some ankles and stuff and they you know they clown him they beat the fuck out
of him and kind of throw him out the side but you'd have like you'd have incidents like that
where the physicality just took a a scary level i'd like to see that where they were actually trying to hurt each other the whole game
and that's also the game where i would i've always said they should put aluminum bats into
major league baseball just start knocking the fuck out of it do nhl level players get intimidated
murray you think oh definitely there are some players that intimidate other players. Zdeno Chara, a defenseman for the Boston Bruins, is over seven feet tall with his skates on.
And so he's a pretty imposing figure. And so they definitely get intimidated. Like there's a bruiser on every team. Ryan Reeves is the loser for my team, the Blues.
But does it work for him?
If something bad happens? Oh, yeah.
If you're Cros crosby do you just start
dumping the puck and not playing like you can no there's a video of how fights start in hockey at
least in the nhl not with like cordially i don't know it starts pretty cordially like and they're
canadian so they they got that x and a and they're just kind of talking to each other about it and
it's like two guys standing at the face off like hey you want to go you want to go all right you want to go right now you want to go now all right let's do it and they
just like throw it down and start going challenging each other it's much more cordial than it was in
like the national games where like it's countries fighting for honor but yeah they definitely get
intimidated there's a there was a study that i read on the hockey reddit that like marked
aggression or or success tendencies
as far as scoring shots on goal,
puck possession, following fights,
and following your team
winning a fight, you had a marked
improvement in the rest of the team
with puck possession, with passing accuracy.
No shit! You just hurt one of their good players!
Oh, yeah. Well, no.
It's usually... No, it's not like that.
It turns out, if you not the goalie unconscious you score
much more easily but it never happens like that it's never like ryan reeves a big brawler going
up against sydney crosby like the the penguins wouldn't let that happen that pittsburgh penguins
but it's against hockey culture like typically players kind of find their match yeah you find
who you would go up against and then you do that and then you hope that you win, and your team's
rooting for you. I feel like
if somebody was like, you want to go? You could be like,
nah, man, you're like eight inches taller than I am.
You go pick on somebody your own fucking size.
That guy over there, go get him. That's actually in the
clip that I was watching. The guy was
taking the face off, and he was going to fight a guy over here.
And he's like, yeah, we're going to go right after
this, eh? Right now. Right now, eh?
And the guy over here goes, why don't you take him on huh and he goes nah you're too big you're too big
and so he goes for the other guy i love that he wanted a fair fight
and i feel like size is pretty important but there's definitely a hockey fighting style
like i feel like it's it literally is its own martial art feel like because... And I don't feel like it's the
most effective style either. There's
unwritten rules built into it. Hard to keep your balance
out there. Harder than people realize
watching it. It seems to
matter how well you can control the other person's
jersey and whether your arm
is on top or his arm is on top.
So if you're grabbing his jersey,
his shoulder right here, if your arm's on top,
you're controlling him and you can control the blows and and the distance between you and him but if you're
on the bottom of that it's the opposite it's like he's controlling you but meanwhile you're
fucking skating and like you know the the world's going crazy around you and you probably oh yeah
so NHL fighting is one thing at the lower lower levels, like in the beer league, the better skaters have a huge advantage.
Like, I'm going to assume you can't skate, Kyle.
If it was you and I, I would be able to shake you to an extent
where you'd be such an ineffective fighter.
Dude, such a bad skater.
I've been three times, and I don't know if you've ever seen an ass
that's been properly bruised, but I have.
I promise you. you like you might
have like fell on your butt one time and ow that hurt i got a bruise on my ass but you've never had
falling pancaking right flat on your ass eight or twelve times within an hour span on the ice
ass bruising it looked like i was in like a bd porn flick the night before. I was so black and blue.
I didn't skate again for two years.
It's so traumatic.
It was awful.
I was crippled for like a week.
It was terrible.
I fell over and over.
I'm just a poor ice skater.
And I have that same issue I have with skis where it hurts my ankle
and I'm in excruciating pain the whole time.
Someday I want to shoot on Mirka.
Yeah, exactly.
I would like that.
Oh, yeah, I'd love that.
I haven't put my stuff on in a couple of years now.
Yeah, I'm right there with you.
I think you played at a higher level than I ever did,
but just the same, I'd like to shoot.
Yeah, that'd be fun.
Give it a go.
I feel like street hockey would be fun,
you know, for sneakers and a ball, like i see them playing on trailer park boys all the time
no rollerblades and a ball man you can skate on rollerblades right come on i always use roller
skates uh when i went as a kid and as an adult i have as well because the rollerblades also hurt
my ankles i always so i i played roller hockey too and i always thought i should like
i should switch to roller skates because i'm good on roller skates as well and there are things i
can do like the way you run on your toes to get started the move where you go backwards and stand
on your toes to slow down and when i'm like dude if i had roller skates on i'd be a better player
and there was like one guy in the whole league who played with roller skates they called him quads and uh and he used that toe stop to like to his advantage like a fruitcake all over the
all over the right you see it's not cool which is why i didn't do it but i swear if i switch to quads
like the i don't know just the whole turn around backwards and staying on your toes to slow down
and like change directions it would be an advantage over the rollerblades i can roller
skate quite well like i've only i've done it maybe a dozen times in my life and i can skate backwards
and i'll never fall and i can skate as fast i can skate really fast at least it feels fast when i'm
doing it without any fear uh you don't have to use the toe stop on those quads you can just you
can hockey stop like you do on ice with the rollerblades you just do a little jump before you do it i can do it the first few times you're going to eat shit but you'll
yeah yeah no i i've i've done it a thousand times like i could do that um and you're right you do
it to jump and you will each it's hard to manage the slide like that was the that was my big issue
i felt like the on ice you can hockey stop and it's really predictable and nice and you can even like
regulate the angle of your skate and get what you want on um roller you never knew if you were in
dust or not like the level of slipperiness where i played was really inconsistent and uh i used to
eat shit doing hockey stops on rollerblades way more often than ice i want to hear from cat about
sports right were you all games all the time
growing up or where are you into professional sports now um we're actually are into hockey
when it comes to sports it's like the main sport right um but my dad uh kings but they're sucking
so maybe not kings uh don't be that fan you've won two cups in the last four years jesus christ
or worse imagine being a blues've won two cups in the last four years. I know, I know. Jesus Christ. Try being a Canes fan.
Or worse, imagine being a Blues fan.
Just imagine.
Oh, yeah.
Zero in the last 47.
Have they ever won a cup?
The Blues have never.
They're the oldest team to have never won a Stanley Cup.
Well, then stretch it.
They've won zero cups in the last millennium.
In the last eternity.
There you go.
When Jesus was born.
Until now, no cups. Sorry to interrupt, sorry to interrupt cat continue no you're fine um and then when i was younger my dad had a little league team that my brother was
the goalie um and i would take care of the snack shop of course but i had rollerblades as well i
actually had what they called roller balls and i was one of those people probably like woody where you wouldn't you wouldn't want to brag about it or talk about it because it was
one of those things where like if you did have roller balls they're basically you know roller
skates like roller blades are really thin but the roller balls had more they were like more of a ball
so they had you know it was safer for you to to be on you wouldn't it would be as hard on roller
balls and it would be on roller skates but it's one of those things like if you were in those you would be kind of considered less of a less of a roller
blader than than anybody else so i definitely did when i was younger uh it was just unfortunate
because where we lived there wasn't an ice rink anywhere nearby so uh but we're getting my sister
she just had a kid and we're getting my nephew we just got him a hockey helmet actually and we're
getting them all into playing like that and we're trying to buy curious thing yeah we're trying to
make like make him be the hockey person that you know we never were able to be because we didn't
have an ice rink nearby but yeah we're done we like hockey a lot it's a lot of fun yeah if you're
a parent watching this get your kid into hockey male or female doesn't matter get him into hockey
it builds a lot more character than prancing around as a field fairy in
soccer.
Hockey.
Jesus Christ.
I know. I just said that to bother all the
people who aren't from the United States
who are listening. Oh, you ain't a field
fairy thing.
Some Irishman. Has anyone
here seen the new season of Trailer
Farfois that just came out?
No, I've heard it come out.
It just came out a few days ago.
It's really good.
It's one of their better seasons, I feel like.
You know how sometimes they do just ridiculous
shit and you feel like, well, they'll never top that
again. A lot of the old school
episodes had crazy
shit in it with Sasquatches
and Jim getting, Lahey getting really drunk and it just being absurd.
They topped all of that this season. It was insane. Jim Leahy
has a mannequin with a goatee drawn on it
to look like Julian and he's taken a power drill and drilled a big hole
in the mouth and he's in a swimming pool of J-Rock's
blue Kool-Aaid liquor inside his trailer with the
with the mannequin and he's like kissing it and stuff it's absurd that there's one part rich
um it doesn't appear j-rock has a new business uh in this one where he has a party van you pay
a cover charge to get in his in on his uh his bus he's got a party van. You pay a cover charge to get on his bus.
He's got a party bus,
and you pay a cover charge to get on it.
It's like smoke and liquor and like horse.
He hit it rich at the end of the eighth season, I think.
Well, he must have blown through all that money
because now he's rocking a party bus.
Did he buy an RC track?
I don't know about that.
He got into kiting.
Really heavy into kiting.
But I definitely like this new season.
It's excellent.
I'm trying to think.
There's one thing.
Oh, you see Jim Leahy as naked as you've ever seen him before,
and it's disturbing.
Tell me more.
There's a scene where someone walks in to find that Randy,
who is fatter than ever and has a mohawk the entire season um i mean his belly is massive so they find randy and mr lahey laying on
the floor drunk in mr lahey's apartment the morning after they've had sex and there's there's j-rock
vodka laying everywhere in empty bottles and jim Leahy is dressed up like a big game hunter.
Randy's dressed up like a deer with like a nose and antlers and everything.
And Jim has a big fake gun.
Jim's wearing nothing but like a toilet paper roll on his dick.
Nothing else.
Like balls, pubic hair, everything.
Completely naked.
He just has a toilet paper roll around his
penis and that's all he's wearing.
Randy's naked
and wearing that costume
half ripped off and there's all kinds of
sex toys and lube all over the floor.
This season was absurd.
I bet their cleaning lady
quit too.
If you haven't seen the new season of trailer park boys you should
definitely check that out it's really good i went through 10 episodes in two nights so
you should check that out i gotta get all my other show watching in before game of thrones
comes out on the 12th because then it's gonna be nothing but that but speaking have you guys
watched better call saul yet yes i'm current he has but i have
not it's a great show i'm not i don't want to say anything to spoil any part of it but if you're
listening definitely watch that show it's great it feels like it's a lot of character development
yeah i went one episode in and i just i just felt too slow for me like it's just i don't know i
couldn't get into it then you might not like not like it. Too slow is a normal complaint for me on shows.
But for Better Call Saul, somehow I'm liking it.
The actor who plays Saul, he was cast as Michael Scott.
And he lost the job to Steve Carell.
And there's an episode later, maybe season 8, 9, 10, somewhere in there of The Office,
where it's sort of a bizarro office.
Jim's trying to hook up this job for Pam in Philadelphia,
and so she goes into an office, and he's there.
He's the office manager of this new place,
and he's doing his Michael Scott bit like he did originally nine years before
when he was trying to get cast for his thing.
So it's interesting to see him in that role,
because it's completely different than Michael Scott,
but it's still really funny
because he's the same sort of awkward, inappropriate,
racist, homophobic, misogynistic,
but in the nicest, goofiest kind of way possible kind of guy.
Are you current on the ninth episode, Taylor,
of Better Call Saul, the most recently?
Yeah, I've seen them all.
Twist.
Oh, a Shyamalan twist. Twist. Oh, Shyamalan Twist.
Yes. I liked it.
It was very good.
I gotta watch now. You do gotta watch it.
And Kat, give it a shot.
One more episode.
What shows do you like, Kat?
What's your favorite show?
I watch a lot of anime.
Aside from that, I've been...
Where's a good place to get anime? I watch a lot of anime. Aside from that, I've been... Where's a good place to get
anime?
Crunchyroll.
To Crunchyroll.
They have so many. Netflix is actually picking up
on their amount of anime.
No, not Netflix.
I was going to say, though, they don't have the
amount that is available on
Crunchyroll. I started one on
Netflix and I had to go to Crunchyroll to finish it.
Not even fucking close.
Amateur hour over there.
They're obviously only hooked up with a couple
of companies. They only have Funimation stuff
and they don't really have a lot
of the other companies or what's available.
Sean Hannity told me
that Netflix was trying to steal our internet
today, so I believe it.
Fuck Netflix. Just steal your internet? If it's our internet today, so I believe it. Fuck Netflix.
Just steal your internet?
If it's on Fox News, it must be true.
There's really no better place for news about the internet
or tech in general than Fox.
Fair and balanced, goddammit.
They're cream of the crop.
There's some real technical people there.
You know what would be fun?
This would be a fun little game.
If we did sort of a family feud style thing where we ask...
Maybe I got the game show wrong.
But basically we ask your parents certain questions and you have the answers.
And we see whether they answered A or B to a certain political question or something like that.
It would be fun to do that.
To see if they're misinformed?
To see where they stand on certain
issues and certain topics it'd be it'd be interesting to get their viewpoint of some
things i i'll warn you this as as wackadoo as i think my father's opinions are he would probably
beat all of us in a debate about them i believe you yeah like we were talking once and he was
like science is good,
but not geology. Geology
is pretty bad. Those people don't realize the Earth
is like 6,000 years old.
Agreed. Too boring.
That has been...
I've seen debates about
that and the older
and the new Earth people just lose that
embarrassingly every time when a professional
goes against them.
I'm sure, but if a normal professional goes against them i'm sure but if a
normal person goes against my father even with a ridiculous like yeah and you eventually you're
like well there's no way yeah but you give up out of exasperation not because you're like well i'm
convinced you just say a few like you know striations in rocks in places like the grand canyon fossils so if i
understand carbon dating right like you know we know that bones have a pretty consistent amount
of carbon in them and we know that the carbon leaves and just turns into regular rock whatever
the hell that's made out of at a predictable rate therefore we can look at how much carbon is left in a fossil and say, oh,
this is this old because
you know, like whatever. The radioactive decay
of the carbon-14 isotope
is a measurable thing. It's recording, yeah.
It's half-life. Yeah.
Alright, I'm sure I screwed it up.
But, um, alright, yeah, so you're recording half-life
of a carbon decay
and, uh,
even armed with that, you'll still lose.
But you won't lose.
You'll just give up because you can't lose that
because the Earth is not 6,000 years old.
To say so is patently ludicrous.
I've been around people who they would be like,
no, man, I don't think it's 6,000 years old,
but there's no way it's like 5 billion.
I don't know about all that.
And I'm just like, well, how old do you think it is jackass like a million two million like what are these numbers
even how can you even uh conceive of these numbers when you think about when you're talking about
hundreds of millions versus billions of years you can see things in space where the light takes more
than six thousand years to get here you know so so that thing has to be older than six thousand
years because it's more than 6 000 light
years from here and we couldn't see it otherwise yeah yeah it so yeah i don't know but there's a
lot of ways to tell that not only that the earth is uh is billions of years old but also that the
universe in general is billions of years old. And anyone who argues differently,
while I don't have the stats here to go through and explain to you,
like someone else does.
It's been taken care of.
You're just wrong.
You're just ignorant.
So the economy under Bush Sr. did terrible, right?
If you remember, Clinton got in on it's the economy, stupid, right?
So the economy was lousy under Bush Sr.
And then it was good under Clinton. That Sr. And then it was good under Clinton.
That's okay.
Then it was good under Clinton.
And then after Clinton came Bush Jr.
And it did really poorly again.
And then Obama comes in and it does well.
And my father will sit there and argue
that all these Democrat successes
leading all the way back to like 1988,
you know, when Bush Sr bush senior took in till now
it's all been a result of the republicans setting them up for success as you're right before they
left office that's great yeah it's like i saw a great video the other day and for the life of me
i couldn't find it again but it was obama uh sort of like answering a few of his critics he was like
they said he like he went back and quoted Mitt Romney.
He said, Mitt Romney said he'd do this and that.
He's like, it's already.
He said, we have unemployment down to 6% in two years.
He's like, well, it's been in four years.
He's like, it's been two years and it's five and a half.
You know, he's like, I think that's pretty good.
He beat Romney's promise.
Yeah, he just, yeah. And there were several examples like that where he was like they said this they said that
and this happened they said this and that but it's better now and it was it was really uh it swayed
me a lot he was he was i was like yeah it is a lot better now yeah you're right it was scary
fucking before he came into office it was it was scary time unemployment's five and a half
percent so now they have some like labor participation rate that they want to pick on
or something like that and it's like god damn it there's been a standard way to measure unemployment
since like the 20s and since you don't like the answer you're getting you're changing the rules
i don't know about that now now i've i, I think there's probably a conservative side to that argument because I guarantee you that if there's a way for the
liberals to count, uh, count those numbers the way, make those numbers look the way they want
them to, then they're doing it to sway it a bit. So I could, I doubt it's five and a half percent.
I bet it's higher than that, but I don't think it's substantially higher than that. I think
everybody's cheating and lying as much as they can and you just gotta consider
that the margin of error with politicians they have a 25% margin of
error bullshit when you listen to a politician at least that's for a good
politician that's a good way to look at it actually like in all seriousness
that's a good way to look at it 25% bullshit allotment and that really is a
good politician.
For a real shitty politician,
it's at least 60% bullshit
margin of error.
At least more than half of what comes
out of most of their mouths is a lie
or misinformation or
a half-truth. Are you talking about
Ted Cruz? Sure, yeah.
Isn't that guy fucking Canadian? How does that work?
Is it him? It might be. Yeah, I don't know how that works exactly i'm not you're gonna have to get one of those uh explain it to me
like i'm fives from reddit on that one because i have no fucking clue how i thought i keep hearing
that he's uh he was born in canada which but i think he had two american parents and you know
he's american okay all i know is they really hassled
obama about that that whole thing for i don't know eight years they did but it doesn't make
i don't want this fucking uh beady-eyed canadian sneaking in under the rug that's all i'm saying
dude you act like he's Irish.
Don't even fuck a joke about that.
Hey, you saw what happened to Kennedy, right?
I did.
Woody probably did.
Age jokes.
Oh, man.
Where do we go from here, boys?
And girl.
I don't know.
Do you want me to whip up a new topic?
Let's see.
I've got Jamal Jones' prison record bookmarked here.
We could always do that.
It didn't sound like it was that bad.
It sounded like he was just a really bad drug dealer, right?
So it was eight felony convictions, six of which were for drugs two of which were for violent assault with serious
injury this is what his contractor his carpenter yeah yeah i don't know he went to prison for his
second violent assault with serious injury this is the guy the general contractor gave uh what
his security code to yeah i mean i think that's pretty bad and and you know
who knows how i feel like you get busted for what one in every 10 things you do you would think
working in the workshop at jail he'd have sharpened his skills up a bit but that guy cannot cut a
fucking door i he's awful he's all like he installed a floor and used the wrong kind of nail
gun you know use that big pneumatic one with the 45 degree angle he was just using regular like you know crown molding nails in the floor and stuff
i'm sorry but go on i'm sorry to jump off topic i remember uh murcus quote quote from either last
week or the week before about uh we're talking about how jesus yeah we're talking about how
jesus would feel about uh gun control and mur like, I think he would especially be hard on the nail guns.
And that ended up being a meme.
And I saw where it was on 4chan.
So that was a funny little quip you had there.
I saw that too.
It does not translate to meme format well.
I'm just sitting there like an idiot with a white text over my head and below it.
But it was still complimentary.
Appreciate it.
Yeah, yeah, very funny.
Very funny.
That was a good one.
You knocked it out of the park last week.
You did.
What was different about last week
that made you so on top of your game?
I feel like you get a lot of coke before the show started.
Was it coke?
That was one aspect.
I was also, like, I was delusionally tired.
Like, I was so tired I could hardly function.
15 minutes into that show, you know that second wind you get sometimes when you're so tired?
It's like your body's like, we've got to get up.
We've got to go.
We've got to keep it going.
There's a reason he's not asleep.
It means we've got to be alert.
At least I get that second wind when I get super tired.
Yeah, Kyle, you know what I'm talking about.
So delusionally tired is how i get supermerca out
of you uh that week that week i had a that's great and a beer there are two beers so when
when woody gets delusionally tired he snores really loud and sits in the pastor's seat for
18 hours i'll never forgive you for that. I never will. I forgive you,
but I will not forget.
Ever.
You stole my worker,
you son of a bitch.
That was a fucking game
of Civilization V.
Yes, you bitch!
That was awful.
I'm talking about
our cross-country road trip
that you drove zero miles on.
It was your truck?
Yeah, exactly!
You switch,
you take turns.
I would have.
I would have.
You could have said something.
Oh, it was awful.
I didn't want to be...
My spine just fused together in the back of my neck after that trip.
That was a really long drive.
It was 18 hours there and 22 hours back.
It felt like three, but it was long.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, you were awake for three.
I think you woke up around Washington, D.C.,
then again when the smell hit you in Jersey.
It smells like home.
It smells like either home or an open latrine
from a World War II battlefield.
I'm not sure which.
Justin Bieber's poopy diaper pants.
And then in New York where we got a little bit sidetracked
in that sort of crime-ridden ghetto neighborhood, and then you New York where we got a little bit sidetracked in that sort of crime ridden ghetto neighborhood
and then you slept again
until we got to Boston.
It was an interesting trip.
I'll never
that ruined me for road trips
in general. I will never drive more than
four hours alone again.
Before then I was an Iron Man.
I had done it all. I had done
cross country zigzag the whole
continental us but after that one they're going solo it was just it raped my mind i never ever
road trip again i will carry my load in terms of driving i know probably never happened again
i was carrying woody's load the entire time got gay again yeah the entire time so i have a question for cat so
you said that your dad owned a card and board game shop are you still into board tabletop games magic
the gathering that kind of stuff or are you pretty much exclusively video game now we actually had a
game that uh garfield made the guy that did magic Magic, he had a board game called Robo Rally.
I haven't heard of it.
So, yeah, we still play board games.
Actually, the one that's really fun that I suggest anyone to play,
especially if they want to know if their friends are liars, is Ultimate Werewolf.
It's the same as, like, Mafia, and there's a couple other game types just like it,
where you all take on worlds, and you all turn your cards upside down,
and if you get the werewolf, you don't want people to know you're a werewolf.
You want everyone else.
So they all point a finger at the end of it and say who they're going to shoot.
And if they shoot the werewolf, then the werewolves don't get any points,
and then the villagers win.
And then it's like that kind of thing.
So basically, if you get a werewolf, you want to learn how to lie
and pretend you're not a werewolf.
And it's ultimately a game of learning how to lie. It you're not a werewolf. It's ultimately a game of
learning how to lie. It's kind of fun.
I haven't played that. I've played Mafia, though, and that is a good time.
Yeah, isn't it?
It's like you almost have to balance.
Yeah, it's like you realize it's an actor.
If you're a great liar,
you can't be that great of a liar
because you have to kind of pretend that you're
a bad liar to throw people
off the scent.
Yeah.
Like, it's a lot of mind games there.
I enjoy it.
Yeah.
And there's one class that, like, you want to be shot.
So that kind of changes up the game.
Of, like, there's the tanner.
And he wants to be shot in order to get a point just for himself.
So you want to pretend you're kind of like that werewolf suspect, but you're not.
And, yeah.
Yeah.
You can't be too obvious.
You can't just
start like growling at people so you don't play like magic anymore any of that no no i still have
a magic gathering binder actually that's sitting around here because we we just have so much
abundance from all the stuff we've collected throughout the card comic store um but it for
me it was just more so getting into that nerd realm and the comic
card story we only had it for a few years because the owner with my dad the co-owner was like a
dummy so we went from that and then we we moved out of the valley up to here to palmdale i i
played this game once like you know there's introduction games where you like you know
in this one you'd say four facts about yourself but
one of them was a lie and uh typically you'd pick out like the most unbelievable one and my boss
was like i once had a parachute fail on me uh i i forget what it was like he climbed k2
he's the youngest of three brothers.
And something else.
He was third place in the state wrestling championship.
Only like 350 people have ever climbed K2.
So that narrows it down.
Well, it turned out the youngest of three brothers was the lie.
And you're like, ah, how clever.
Ah, the humblebrag approach.
Yeah.
Name three exceptional things you've done and then one menial thing yeah and i shit 20 minutes ago guess yeah now whatever i if i'm ever faced with
that that's totally how i'm doing it i'm naming like some outrageous things and i've got a lot of subs. I've got a great hairline. I'm 83 years old.
Right?
And my sister and I never fight.
Or something like that. That'll be the lie
because I have no sister.
I'm glad
they didn't go Game of Thrones at all with the sister.
I was like, that would have been bad.
I kind of thought that said it as well.
I don't know why.
Although I also... Because you've been listening to so many hours of Game of Thrones. So many hours. You don't know why. Although I also heard it.
Because you've been listening to so many hours of Game of Thrones.
So many hours.
You hear about siblings and you just jump to incest.
It's just natural after that many hours of that audiobook.
Yeah.
As is tradition.
There was also a scene they left out of the show
where Tyrion gets in bed with Sansa
and gets naked with a hard dick
and they explain what his dick looks like
and there's a whole thing. She's naked
too. He has a bad dick, right?
Well, she thought it was ugly.
She was not a fan, right. She said something about
it being big and veiny. I don't know.
It just depends. I guess
it depends on what you think.
It depends on what your opinion of a pretty penis
is, I suppose. It wasn't Sansa's.
In the TV show,
he just kind of like says
look we don't have to do this
you know until you want
to if ever and it's all
cool in the book
he's seriously lusting after her
yeah well yeah and a lot more
people would have tapped out of the show if there
was just a five minute scene of
the dwarf laying there naked with a
heart on with an underage
girl just holding up the sheets like trying to get something to happen but that would have been
my favorite scene it would have you would have enjoyed that oh that'd be great yeah it's yeah
there's a few things they cut out and i wish they hadn't i i feel like the the giant deserved a lot
more character development so that you understand just how god-awful he is um and there's a few like the mountain the mountain
oh oh i thought you literally meant like the giants north of the wall i'm like i don't remember that
character no the mountain the um mountain the rides that guy is awful yeah yeah he did a lot
of awful stuff and they don't focus on it that much aside from just
the red viper being like you're a per you killer like that was about it that's like all that they
went over and it sounded more like a mantra than a recapping of what he did that was horrific
yeah he's a terrible guy and also there's there's a lot of magic in the books that they just don't
throw into the shows for some reason i feel like it's a much more magical world than the shows let
on and sometimes you're wondering if some of these characters really are magical or if they're
just scam artists but in the in the book it's obviously yeah they're magical they've got all
these crazy spells and there's i don't know i just passed a part where there's a weird there's it's
called the black gate it's a weirwood door that like has weirwood face, and it's like, who is there?
And he's like, I'm a brother of the Night's Watch, and he says his vows, and the door's like, then pass.
And then its mouth opens until it's a passageway or something.
You should do the audiobooks.
Yeah, it's totally a magical door.
There's no magical doors in the show, so I wish they hadn't skipped over all that.
no magical doors in the show, so I wish they hadn't skipped over all that.
There's very little fantasy
when it comes to... All they have is the
direwolves, the dragons, and maybe like the
white walkers and stuff. Other than that, I don't see them cover much
of anything that's not
more realistic. You're right, and
I would argue the things that you mentioned play
too small a role. Yeah, I would love
to see more of the direwolves and other
means of that. They're all in the book.
The books should be called the direwolf monologues.'s just it goes on and on like i know all of
there's there's i know all of their names i know what they look like i know what they smell like
like the whole thing their relationship with their owners how the other people nearby feel about them
what they're doing uh being how effective a hunter they are yeah how they skulk about what they smell
it should be that series should be called A Song of Feasts and Wolves
because you spend so much time describing feasts
and so much time describing those goddamn wolves.
I don't care that much about the wolves
because I'm way more into the other fantasy creatures.
I think it's hilarious that that guy is so fat
and he seems to really get off on the feast talk.
I never put that together
a sex scene will be like
a paragraph
where you hear about somebody's dick or a
vagina or a boob here or there
and he explains like he talks about
sex like he just has no interest in it he just
kind of like gets it's mostly the same shit
it's like and he entered her
and seen like that's it
she liked how he felt inside her it's always something like that it's pretty quick and it's
over but when the feast comes around you know about the capons gripping with fat you know about
the horse meat sizzling as the spit boys turn it over the open fire and how the fat sizzling off of it
you know about the juices that are running off characters beards and mustaches you know you know
if the if the leek soup is uh is hearty or not whether there are bits of carrots in it and if
there is a bit of carrot you might count yourself lucky because the the soup at heron house sucks
and he goes on and on about whether the feasts
are great or wonderful and all the meats and all the vegetables the side items and the desserts
the pastries and the tarts the puddings and the plums on and on if it's a white plum or it's or
if it's over it's too ripe or if there are worms in it you always know plenty of bread details as
well all the bread and how they tear it. It's ridiculous.
It's always a crusty bread end
and some cheese.
And I imagine him like
fucking... I imagine him actually doing
a speak to type.
Himself saying this aloud
for some program while he is
eating it.
Oh, yeah.
And Kingp and dripping with fat
that's why it's taking him so long to finish the fucking books those are his meals and he's like
time to get some inspiration and runs off to costco and is going through a cpk pizza dripping
he loves food it's so obvious and he it's definitely he that guy definitely likes food
more than he likes sex just just based on undoubtedly well the way he looks he doesn't
have much option well i suppose not i i really hope that guy doesn't fucking die before he
finishes those books up though that's now let me ask you this are you hoping roy detris lives or
dies i don't care you don't care well i mean all right so let me ask you this. Are you hoping Roy Detrice lives or dies? I don't care.
You don't care?
Well, I mean, all right.
So let me take that back.
You should have phrased it this way.
You should have phrased it this way.
No, I phrased it just like I wanted to.
Do I care if Roy Detrice narrates the next...
I'll rephrase it if you want.
Do you give a fuck if Roy Detrice dies or not before the next book?
Yeah, I suppose so.
I hope he doesn't die, but I don't care if he does Detrice dies or not before the next book. Yeah, I suppose so. I hope he doesn't die,
but I don't care if he does the next book or not, because
I think that someone else could do probably
a better and cooler job, and
I think what would be really cool is if the
if it were a performance, like I was telling
you and Chiz the other day, like, if you
had the actual actors from the show voicing
the characters when necessary, maybe
you would have Roy Detrice giving the third
person perspective and describing the environments and the feasts and such and then when sansa says something the
actress says instead of him going yes sir i i like it here very much like there's no need for him to
do sansa's accent anymore because sansa's here and you know the same would be true for all the
characters i wish you reckon if the character is old is old, I don't think I would like that.
If the character is old, I would like it.
Roy Detrice makes him
horrible. He gets
so slobbery and whiny.
I think he's good with the old characters.
I find them hard to listen to.
I'm not saying their voices don't sound old,
but
there are a couple things he does. If it's a sound effect,
fast forward that shit. If it's a sound effect fast forward that shit if it's a song oh my god it's awful oh the horns you're talking about last week
six times longer about to die at the end of every horn like The last bit of breath is escaping his decrepit lungs.
And then by some fate, he manages to inhale.
He's 94?
He's 91, but I want to hear about Kat's favorite
and least favorite characters.
Because she hasn't read the books at all.
And so you don't have any real
perspective on who's going to die
aside from who you've already seen. Who do you think is next
in the chopping block? And who do you want to be next?
Because this is a good Game of Thrones discussion.
I don't even know their names that well, so I'd be going
based on looks.
I feel you.
No, that's good.
That one white guy?
I don't even know where it left off.
Where did it leave off?
Arya has boarded a ship to
she's crossing the narrow sea.
The hound. So she can become an assassin. So Arya has boarded a ship. She's crossing the Narrow Sea. To Essos.
The Hound.
So she can become an assassin.
The Hound was left to die by the side of the hill after Brienne fought him.
Yep.
Brienne and Podrick Payne are on their own.
I guess they're heading toward the Eyrie.
The Eyrie is currently under the control of Peter Baelish.
And he's got Sansa there with him.
Peter Baelish's little finger.
Yeah, littlefinger.
And the Aaron boy, John Aaron's son is there.
Littlefinger killed that mom who breastfeeds her kid awkwardly.
Yeah, Lysa.
Lysa, yeah, Lysa Tully.
And threw her down that sky hole, whatever they called it.
Moon hole.
No, that's it.
You got it right, Woody. The sky hole. The whatever they called it. Moon hole. No, that's it. You got it right, Woody.
The sky hole.
The moon door, okay.
Moon door.
Majestic was the palace.
I'll tell you what I want the most.
With the best sky hole.
So, it looks like the story's pretty rough right now.
All of your favorite characters, for me anyway, are just in the dumps like like all of my favorite characters are are losing uh you know or or they're dead
unless you like little finger unless you like little finger and i don't he's not even a pov
character uh in the books so i i instead of rooting for anyone at this point i guess i'm
rooting for john snow and tyrian and the calise to a lesser extent
but who i want to pay is is walter fray i feel like i i don't want anybody to tell me i don't
need spoilers but if they don't fucking do something so goddamn awful to walter fray i
don't know if i'm gonna have be able to go on and they keep hinting at it as well like you'll have
some old like granny who knows a lot about like the uh you know
the way the gods work she's like uh she's telling the story of um of the rat king or whatever so
base i'm gonna butcher this story a bit but i guess in ancient times um this cook killed the
king's son and served it to the king in a pie and uh and the king ate it and asked for second helping and uh and then the gods punished
the cook by turning him into a giant white rat that could only uh eat its own babies but it would
never be full that and and and he's like they didn't curse him for killing the king's son
they didn't even curse him for feeding him his own son they They cursed him for dishonoring guest rights.
The gods can't abide that.
So I'm thinking, like, well, Walder Frey just butchered the Starks,
like, throwing guests, you know, who were guests under his roof.
Like, they've got to do something so awful to him to quench my vengeance.
I'm going to text you out of nowhere later and ruin it.
They'd better do something awful to him how long is the cat what characters do you
like i know you don't know their names but like who are you really drawn to who's interesting
who's not i just i want to get a perspective of someone who has not even listened touched
read any of the books um uh let's see obviously just describe the characters and we can pull the
names out obviously the queen of dragons right she's like she's like the badass that's gonna come over and
take over all these people and she's kind of off on her own little side story which i like once it
finally integrates into the main storyline would be interesting to see when she's crossed the sea
i guess she's probably like over i don't know that you would know the position like geography of the
map um i wish i i do wish they would do more with the dire, like, geography of the map.
I do wish they would do more with the direwolves,
because I like the kid that can't... Bran.
Him? Yeah, the one that his legs are all messed up and everything like that.
I wish they would go more into him,
because I'd imagine at some point he would use the wolves to his advantage
as a mount, like World of Warcraft, you know,
and be able to start doing something
in that sense. He's not even going to be in the next season.
He hasn't reached level 35.
He needs to be mounting a
dragon. Forget the wolves.
Yeah, well, he has one of the wolves.
It's this little thing that he takes over the
visions of them.
He's going to war with a dragon eventually.
I don't know that.
If I were him, I would build
myself an armored backpack and
a crazy suit of armor for Hodor
and I would just live inside him.
I'd just be in there with some supplies
to wake up every now and then and feed upon.
But I'd be living in some sort of an armored
shell backpack on Hodor just
fucking shit up. I think that's the way
to roll. Hodor follows me
on Twitter.
Yeah, the guy
who plays Hodor. He doesn't follow me.
How many
people does he follow? Can you check?
I don't know. Probably hundreds. Don't ruin my fun.
I'm just saying
you could DM him and his phone will vibrate
and you could fuck with him a bit. That'd be fun.
Hodor!
Yeah, yeah.
That's all I send him. It's one'd be fun. Hodor! Yeah, yeah.
It's one of the only tweets he gets all day, probably.
It would not be an original joke.
Hodor is just a more interesting character in the books,
I think, as well.
No, that's not true. I hate him at least as much
in the books as I do in real life.
I'll kiss your ass if you could tell me
what Hodor's real name is there's no way oh i
just learned it too it's not hodor um and i would remember it if you said it but it's just a word
he came up with like there's no rhyme or reason to the word yeah oh it wasn't a crazy i swear it
was a name i don't remember it i think walder walder i was about what i was gonna say was it's a name
that exists in like regular world yeah there's literally at least eight walders in the books
at least eight and that's not counting the walters and the waldas i'm not exaggerating
maybe walder isn't a regular name but yeah i heard it and i was like that's not even a crazy name
like denarius or um i don't know i
like the characters with unique names there's way too many fucking johns and roberts and shit like
that so whenever there's a strong belrus to like keep up with i'm like okay great or an old gray
beard and it's like all right well i i know that guy's name now i'm not gonna get that confused
with one of the other johns or roberts or it I like the names that are, like, I don't know.
Like, if you say
the Queen of Thorns,
like, I remember that name. Littlefinger,
like, that's a name that will burn in.
Or a gamertag.
Yeah.
It's going to be more of a gamertag. Yeah, I guess
I like the characters with gamertags.
That helps me.
More of the description for them,
like Barristan the Bold,
rather than trying to remember Barristan Selmy.
Yep, that would help.
There's so many goddamn characters in that show.
I wonder how many there actually are.
Oh, there's got to be some.
I like his naming strategy after a while
because all the people in the original families
he was writing about have relatively normal names.
There's a few goofy ones like Arya,
but then the further you get into the book series the more you're like
this is just bullshit these are just letters he pulled out at random and when in doubt he just
adds like three y's after consonants yeah like when he's naming like wildling names and like
especially the thins like the magnate of the thin who's they all have crazy names it's
hard to keep up with those characters even igrit y-g-r-i-t-t-e i think that's how they spell it in
the books igrit that's like what about usha and asha it's like he just didn't give a fuck he's
like yeah one will be usha one will be asha they're both badass women try not to get him confused
and even and like theon even takes a moment to
think of it he's like their names even sound alike they wonder blah blah blah but but i i'm i think i
got this right here i think usha is the wildling girl who's escorting bran to the wall and asha
is theon grayjoy's ironborn sister but i could be completely backwards and it really doesn't matter.
That's why they changed him in the series.
That's why Yara is her name.
No.
Theon didn't
get his hands in his sister's
pants in the book.
He was grabbing her boobs.
Just a different form of fondling.
No.
One's further down the road than the other.
Well, neither are good with a sibling.
Let's get that.
I mean, you wouldn't want to fill your sister up any more than you'd want to.
Don't judge me.
Second base or third base, you still went too far, I would say.
You're okay with first base?
Yeah.
Well, it is Game of Thrones.
No, no.
I remember listening to
that part and i'm like oh where's the part on the horse where he only touches her down south and
doesn't exist in the book that was totally a uh really waiting for that insist like it's coming
i i can't wait to hear this 91 year old man read to me about this fantasy story.
To me, I don't know, it was one of the more shocking reveals in the show
and it's not in the book at all.
The timeline's pretty mixed up compared to the books as well
because I'm, like I said, I'm however many hours
into book three, I said,
but I've already found some things
that would be spoilers technically
for anyone who's just a show watcher.
Like what's actually going on right now
with what's Theon's father's name?
Greyjoy.
The King of the Iron Islands,
whatever the fuck his name is.
Something else has happened to him in the books that has not happened to him.
Baelon.
Baelon Greyjoy, yeah.
Yeah, something happens to him in the book that hasn't yet happened,
that may be in the show.
How far are you, like, if you were to translate the audio book into the actual book?
Like, are you halfway through?
Are you three quarters?
I'm two-thirds of the way, if more i got like 12 it's like 42 hours long and i got like 12 or
13 hours left so i've gotten past the red wedding um um bran and hodor are just went through the
black gates and now they're on the other side of the wall. The Night's Watch has just been attacked and Ygritte's just died.
The Khaleesi just had Strong Belros kill the champion of Meereen.
So that's where I am.
I am 20 hours into book three.
There's 27 to go.
So I'm actually just a few hours away
from the half point of the whole series.
Wow. Two and a half books of the whole series. Wow.
Two and a half.
So far.
Assuming he is a lot of listening.
I have a question.
Go on.
I'm curious about this.
Like,
since you guys are so busy probably with your schedules and YouTube and all
that,
how often do you guys actually play video games on a weekly basis?
I play a lot of civilization five.
I probably play
10 or
15 hours of Civ V a week
because the games go so long.
That's the only game I'm playing right now.
I'm pretty obsessed with that.
How many different
games are you playing aside from
that genre?
None really right now.
I run a Minecraft server so i'm in that almost every day
but it's not always playing sometimes it's like interacting with players and stuff like that
making sure things are going well um and then i play i guess i played what 10 hours of civ
last week something like that whatever that one and we did. But I don't game as much as I used to. If you go back
two years, I probably gamed
15-20
hours a week. I used to play
mostly COD, but not
only COD. I used to play
8 hours of Call of Duty for a day
every day.
Until my skills were shocked and strong like a
Mohawk warrior.
That was the one worth playing.
I got like 80 days of playtime on one account,
but I think I had like three,
I don't know how many times I prestige,
probably 30, something like that.
Just dozens of accounts and like KD accounts
and win-loss ratio accounts and game battles accounts.
I played that game.
Like nuke accounts.
Like, I have so many nukes.
Did you have like a bio that counted your nukes?
I never counted the nukes.
Oh, I fucking hated that.
I forgot about that until right now.
Until right now, I forgot that it existed.
But it was like, do you know how many nukes?
Like 26.
And it's like, no one can tell.
I could make an account that said nuke,
7,358,491. Like, nobody one can tell. I can make an account that said nuke 7,358,491.
Like, nobody would know.
I think a lot of people were honest about that.
And I just remember Socrates kept count of his.
And his number was outrageous.
He had a couple hundred nukes.
He was very good.
That guy was out of control good.
Him and J.D. Reid could drop a nuke.
I remember there was one night when we had Junkyard playing with us.
And Junkyard was a notoriously poor player at Call of Duty.
He wasn't very good at all.
He was a negative KDR player.
And so our goal was to get him to get his first nuke ever,
so we were going to be like his support team.
And we played like several games in a row,
and he got an eight-kill streak one time,
and then he lost it, and it kept going bad.
And then we had room in our party, and my friend J reed his gamer tag was uh impulse uh impulse joins the game and he's like what are you guys doing and i'm like well we're trying to help uh
junkyard get a nuke he's trying to get a nuke and i texted him i'm like you should drop a fucking
nuke on him man as fast as you can and fuck with him and he's and he sends me back like a smiley face he drops a nuke like
four minutes into the game like he got a nuke faster than it was it was shockingly fast and
you know the thing went off and we're just like junkyard's like what happened i was on a forest
kill street yeah i play with this guy prayas he turned out to be a thief, but he was very good at Call of Duty.
Yeah, he stole from me.
What did you say?
I remember P. Reyes. I used to play with him a lot.
He was a good player.
He was a very good player. We played against this team,
and they were all running, this is Modern Warfare 2,
they were all running noob tubes, and that
China Lake secondary
noob tube. And I hated
playing against them so much.
We were like, dude, can you get a nuke?
And he's like, yeah, sure.
No problem.
All you got to do is say it.
And then 90 seconds later, the buzzer's going off.
And it was like, against noob tubes.
One man army.
Or I guess it wouldn't be that.
But yeah, it was outrageous.
There's players that are like that
and it was always shocking
because I could get a nuke if I wanted one.
It might not be very pretty,
but I could definitely get one.
It wasn't a huge struggle.
I'd get one within three or four games every time
unless there was just a nightmare
of air support getting shot down or something like that.
But there's players that can drop one at will
that we played with back then
and it was always fun to watch.
Modern Warfare was a game where, like,
if you were a strong player, then it showed.
You really...
You really dominated.
And future Call of Duties,
like your seven and nine kill gun streaks,
just aren't rewarded the way they were back then.
If you could get seven to nine kills in a row
with your gun,
then it was game fucking over for the other
team. They were getting so much air
support dropped on them. AC-130s and chopper
gunners and Harriers and paved lows.
It was a nightmare. You couldn't deal with that.
Sometimes, if you're playing ground war domination,
there's three of those guys on the other team.
It's coming in waves. It's fucking
stacked.
It was never like that again.
Modern Warfare 2 had its high points
but i still think cod 4 is the best i think black ops 2 is the best i know it's not a popular
opinion but but yeah that game had had great balance it had great maps it did black ops 2
was my favorite of all i think some of the guys on the earlier ones have rose colored glasses
i think advanced warfare may be good but i haven't really played it i had a great time playing uh
world at war at times.
I remember playing Search and Destroy in that game early on
with the SVT-40 and the Gewehr
and people sniping with the PTRSD in Springfield and stuff.
That was fun.
Zombies was the only redeemable part of that game to me.
I did not like World at War at all.
Zombies was the shit in every game.
The sound was bad.
But we thought the sound was bad until they started making more Call of Duties.
I'd love to have COD 5 sound back.
Well, what other games are you playing right now, Kat?
I pretty much play anything that's new.
I'm looking forward to Mortal Kombat X.
It's coming out in, like, I don't know.
It's coming out the 14th.
So it's two days after Game of Thrones.
Um,
it's so right around the corner here.
And that,
that one's probably pretty huge.
They've been doing a lot with releasing information about Mortal Kombat X.
Do you think it'll be big though?
Like,
I feel like fighting games haven't been big for a decade.
Oh,
I feel like if they're not Capcom,
nobody cares.
Like if it's not Street Fighter or Marvel versus Capcom,
it kind of like,
it takes a lot more
to kind of get that level of recognition
or just tournaments in general.
The amount of people
that go to Capcom tournaments
versus the other games.
I think it's going to be pretty big though.
They're already doing an invitational
which kind of upset the community.
I don't know how you guys would feel
about something like this,
but they basically invited eight people
a week before the game comes out
And they're giving a hundred grand to the winner
They might be dividing the the money up to the top people, but it kind of pissed off the community because it's an eight-man
Invitational so essentially there's no qualifiers. It's all just previous
Accolades or whatever you've proven up until this point when it comes to Mortal Kombat
Yeah, sometimes when those things are fame basedbased, it's like, oh, but you're not recognizing
the current cream of the crop.
The fame-based guys are often, I hate to say washed up, but past their prime.
I think it just more so comes down to when you have qualifiers, it at least lets other
people, like they could have easily done the the invitational to showcase the game at its higher
potential of pro level play
but when you're giving 100k away that kind
of pisses people off like I could be taking
a chunk of that but I'm not one of the
popular eight so
even if you just give a small amount
like you could divide that five times into
20k and do that many
different tournaments so
we'll see what the company does
when it comes to that it's just that's more recent news of what's going on with mortal
i have a question with a fighting game like that how much does lag come into play
oh huge absolutely huge uh the network coding that they use for online like some games are
known for how beautiful they are in other games it's they they call it online tactics when you
have certain moves that
can be performed online and it can't be performed offline so some people they become like um lag
warriors where they can do really well online but then when it comes to tournaments they just kind
of fall because offline play is huge huge when it comes to games because that that one bit of
latency like when it comes to fighting game knowledge you're down to a frame like you're down to the 60 frames that are within seeing the move happen you're counting the frames of like
this is negative six this is plus four and and it's it's absolutely down to the crucial minute
detail of a fighting game so yeah if it has a bad network coding the game itself like unfortunately
when dead or alive came out it it just had like the network coding
was bad like not only could you log in and play the game itself but it's it's it destroys games
like you can imagine any game right if you're playing call of duty and you sign in and you're
like like lagging all over the place are you gonna want to play no you're just want to be like oh i
was talking to an engineer from nvidia and um you know i'm kind of shooter focused so i was like
how's the lag etc
etc you know and uh he was saying that shooters aren't really the the toughest nut to crack it's
all about the fighting games that those guys are more lag sensitive than any shooter yeah
well you because you can see what happens with the the compensation of like okay i hit my right
trigger when does the bullet hit the wall but But when you're playing based on little frame details,
you can get away with moves that you shouldn't be able to get away with offline.
Because if you do a low sweep, and that's huge in a fighting game
because you have to react and block low,
they can get away with that online because they can't have that reactional time.
And that creates bad habits, and fighting games are all muscle memory.
I hate playing fighting games online
every time i just get spanked it's no fun at all i i never i don't really play fighting games
which is probably why but i'll like play enough like i played the uh the what is it injustice
i don't even know if that's popular but i played that for a while and i got to the point where i
like i could beat a hard computer opponent and I'm like alright
alright let's take
this online see how I do
it was a bloodbath
I was so demoralized and I don't play
anymore I haven't played anything
but NHL 15 in the last
three weeks I don't remember which
Mortal Kombat it was but I remember playing
on Playstation 2 with my roommates like in
2005 or something like that.
And I had a lot more video game experience than they did.
I had played a ton of Grand Theft Auto and SOCOM and stuff like that
and a few fighting games here and there, Street Fighter and stuff.
But they didn't seem to have very much experience at all.
And the way we played, because there were three of us,
is if you lost, you lost a controller.
So I was sitting there on my 22nd game in a row
and and my roommate is getting drunker and drunker and he's getting pissed he's fucking
he's this big bulky lithuanian guy he's like mother fucker don't fucking sub zero because i
keep i'm sub zero and i keep i know what not sub zero i'm um scorpion and i keep doing that thing
where you you know you come here! Get over here!
I'm just abusing that over and over.
I got the manual out, memorized half
a dozen moves, and I've got a little
repertoire I'm building on now, and I'm just repeating
them over and over, building combos out of them.
And he's just button mashing, so it's just
completely ineffective.
He finally got so pissed, he literally throws
the PlayStation 2 controller.
He's like, I'll show you! And he fucking throws throws it and it sticks in the wall like half the controller's
in the wall half of it's out of the wall he finally mastered throwing a ninja star he did
and and and he likes to and we're like dude what the fuck that's the wall he's like you think that's
bad and he fucking he like does like a warm-up and fucking punches right through the wall right next to where the controller sticking out
He's like now. That's a hole
The next day I taught him how to spackle so
So I don't think I've actually played Mortal Kombat since then I'd like to I'd like to play but I know I'm not
Yeah, that's a long time ago.
Yeah, it was 2005.
I don't even remember which Mortal Kombat that was.
If I was to pick up a game, I think it'd be CSGO.
That's the one that appeals to me.
How do you ever catch up?
That's where I'm at! Thank you! That's exactly what my thought is.
I just started playing CSGO.
Same feeling. I got this new badass PC. Let me give give it a go but i feel so far freaking behind everyone else because they
know the choke points they know what guns to go to they know how essentially just like the even
if they played a year before you that's they got i'm told the skill-based matchmaking helps with
that i guess it's not your experience yeah well definitely i mean any usually any game that has the ranking
system well made you can do that but i mean essentially there's still this this kind of
way of playing you know there's like a language to it and and when you're a newbie learning a
language you're going to learn like you know just a few words when somebody else is just fluent and
they're just absolutely amazing at it so it's still the same way about
counter-strike if it was you know there's games like that we've all played way too much of like
cold 84 like i can just imagine if i had never stopped playing that game and then someone tried
to pick it up now like just the knowledge that i acquired over the time i have played is just
kind of i talked about we're both at a level in cod 4 i don't know if i still am
we're on any map you could have us look straight down
and we'd pretty much know where we are.
Yeah, no matter what.
You know where to throw the spawn grenade.
Not even spawn grenades, but you know exactly where to run
on each map and where to throw.
Yeah, the choke points.
I know the timing. I know when you can and can't run places.
I'm like, whoa, whoa, hold up. They're pre-firing.
They're going to hit that spot.
Lots of stuff like that. I know grenades that you have to look straight up
in the air, aim it at a cloud to the left
of that post and toss it, and it'll come in
through a skylight and blow up on the
S&D plant spot
on vacant. Same thing with nootubes.
They would instantly go halfway and nootube
it right there just to get the spawn
kills. It's ridiculous.
Yeah, on Wasteland.
I was going to say, what's the one with the um
is it like runway or something has a river in the middle of it this is um oh creek no this is
monowarfer 2 i'm talking about creek sucked it has three bridges that go across and there's a river
and there's lots of buildings on it talking about we talking about Overgrown? Because that has two bridges. No, this is Modern Warfare 2. No.
Oh, well, shucks. Modern Warfare 2.
I want to say it's like Runway or something, but that doesn't matter. Oh, are we talking about Modern Warfare 2?
Yes. Yes. Okay, I'm sorry.
I thought...
Rundown, maybe?
Oh, Overpass?
Or Underpass? Nope. One of those?
No, Underpass is when it was just raining
so much that it was obnoxious.
Yeah.
They had some of the best maps in that.
It's rundown.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, that also had spawned noob tubes that were just ridiculous.
It was really tough because there was no protection on the A and C flags,
so people would just bomb it from the start.
But yeah, it would take 100 hours of
playtime just to catch up with someone
who's got that kind of experience.
That's if you've got a guide.
Go in there blind and just trying to memorize.
It would be hard to even learn
because you'd be getting hit with stuff that you
couldn't understand. You just randomly
hit you and it kills you. You don't know where it was thrown from,
who threw it, how to avoid it.
None of that stuff. You don't know what guns are even good. I wouldn't know where it was thrown from, who threw it, how to avoid it, none of that stuff. You don't know what
guns are even good. I wouldn't know
where to start with Counter-Strike.
It's fun because it still gets
that kind of competitive feeling of once you do
get it, it feels very accomplishing and like
oh, I'm going somewhere. But
I have the same intimidating feeling
about it. Luckily, like with Twitch, you have
all these pros and people who are even
semi-casual at it still can help you and assist you in chat and tell you where to go. But it's very
hard when you're playing on Twitch because they have an expectancy. If you have a certain
amount of viewers, they have a way of like, oh, you should be a certain skill level already.
I'm constantly like, if I'm playing Counter-Strike, I'm defending myself like, this is only my
second day, guys. I'm saying that every maybe half hour, I defending myself like this is only my second day guys like and i'm saying that every like maybe half hour i'm like this is my second day like trying to not feel
like i'm like excusing my poor skill at the game we uh i think we should do another fallout stream
that's the i think that would be fun i think we need to go back into the world of fallout
woody and i uh what do gave you some bad advice. You gotta try H1Z1.
Have you guys tried H1Z1?
I haven't.
It's popular, though,
among streamers, especially.
It's simplified, right?
So you don't have that intimidation
of, like, not knowing.
Because there's only an AR,
which is the main, like,
full auto rifle.
And then you have your pistols
and a recurve bow.
There's just three weapons and obviously you
want the ar on the shotgun so there's like just a few weapons to choose from uh but i play the
there's a different setting you can play in a server where you meet up with people but i play
in what they call the battle royale and you basically start with about anywhere from 100
to 200 people you all get loaded in at the same time you're in a box at first for 30 seconds where
you hear the most disturbing things people People run, because it's like distance
with mic. So like you can, as soon as you get close to someone within proximity like
that, you know, you can hear them. But as soon as they're kind of away, their voice
faints and then you don't hear them anymore. So everyone has a mic and you hear some of
the most disturbing things of like what people are saying in there. Like people come up to
me, they're like, shut up, cunt. And I'm like, I didn't do anything! Like what are you yelling at me for?
But you would go around and what makes it fun is the social game of it. So it's last man standing
out of all that battle royale. And then eventually there's a safe zone out of this kind of pretty
big map. And then you have to get your way into that safe zone. And eventually a toxic mist will
float in and get you into that safe zone. Then the safe zone gets smaller and smaller
until literally it's a dot of where you can walk within it within 30 seconds.
And it's to force the fight.
So you can't just camp and you can't just stay still.
And it's up to you to choose whether you want to team up with people.
And there's cars as well so you can travel faster.
And that's about as intricate as it gets.
And you just want to be the last man standing. So for me, I find it a lot of fun because I'm like the naive person that's like, intricate as it gets. And you just want to be the last man standing.
So for me, I find it a lot of fun because I'm like the naive person that's like, let's team up.
And they're like, okay.
And then you turn your back and they're like, ha-ha.
And I'm like, aw.
It's like Hunger Games.
Yeah, that's what a lot of people refer to.
It's basically Hunger Games.
And it's up to you to be Katniss and be like, let's be friends, guys.
Or you have the average douchebag.
And hide in a tree for two and a half hours
yeah you can do that you can to get top 10 easily but that's what i like about the toxic mist is
that it tells you like you have one minute to get to the safe zone and then you have to get there
and then the toxic mist eventually keeps falling in until eventually you i want to as a streamer
you mean do you is it easy for you to get lots of help?
Yeah, they do.
Well, they stream snipe you and they can be assholes and come and kill you instantly because there is a location as to where you are.
A lot of people hide that so that people can't do that.
But yeah, I do get a lot of people that are like, oh, I'm watching your stream.
It's just so much fun because so much random shit happens.
Just yesterday I was playing it and there's a third guy with us and it's two of us and we decided to team up we pick up a third
guy and then i'm like oh i ask red or blue i'm like matrix or something i'm like red or blue
pill and if they pick the red pill i kill them it's totally fucked up don't team up with me
but yeah and then if they say blue i'm like okay i'll let them pass and everyone in my stream is
always like kill him kill him like they always just want me to kill whoever i meet so uh the the third guy i asked him while the other guy
was looting ammo and i'm like red or blue and he's like red and i'm like so i'm like right and
then i didn't say anything i was just smiling kind of like yeah you know like a badass and then the
other guy runs out and he shotguns me and he's like oh i thought he killed you and i'm like
no i killed him and it's just like stupid shit like that happens i'm like why the fuck you kill
me i know and he's like oh i thought that was you that got killed it was so funny you're supposed
to pick the red one right based on the movies you're supposed to pick the red pill not the
blue pill yeah i just did yeah if they pick if they pick red to me that's death so that you know
they can go off into their own matrix of dying. Into their own matrix.
In their own matrix.
It's funny. You see the personality of the
person. That's why it's fun to watch those streams for me
because you can see
some people literally kill everyone they see on
site. For me, I'm like the
naive person that believes in people.
Me too.
Doesn't work out.
It can, but it's definitely not usual and and it's
fun to have that kind of female male counterpart thingy like i i like to fuck with a lot of guys
that i meet on there like we have to make babies this is a zombie apocalypse like you rp like
role play it and stuff so it turns out to be a lot of fun i find that the most interesting game
to stream as of late because it's it's more about the personality of the person um you know otherwise you can watch someone who is skilled but it's so boring because
they could just sit in a bush and then get top 10 and then fight their way out of it you guys
i've played a lot of i played a good bit of daisy i don't know how it is daisy yeah that's what
people refer to it as daisy but um i've been wanting to to play Daisy over POC for a long time and play it
well because I love what I've been
watching. What's his name? Frankie
1080p on PC
and 1080p
I think. I've been watching his
his over POC
videos and they're excellent.
It's like a half hour video
of him just fucking around
with his buddy kind of uh cruising around
the the map and and just being you know they see somebody they kill them or they befriend them
you never would know which way it's going to go and it's based off of daisy but the overpac mod
gives you a whole oh it's actually it's it's uh it's arma 3. that's what they were playing they
were playing arma 3 uh overpac that's. That's the latest rendition I get.
I guess. And that looks really slick because
they've got a whole economy
system built in with coins
and you can
sell the weapons. You loot off
of people and there's vehicles
and base building and it looks like
a lot of fun. I've been wanting to
do that. But H1N1 sounds fun too.
How much is it? H1Z1. Z1 yeah h1z1 h1n1 is the uh the
what is that the flu virus um it's actually an alpha and it's 20 bucks to get into the alpha
which is very strange because usually it's like you get into closed alphas or closed betas
um and it was originally sony online uh but they sold. So Sony Online sold, and now it's another company picking it up.
But they still update it.
It's a great game.
I've never played, like, to me, I'm a little bit of a gaming snob.
Like, I like difficulty, and I like there to be a decent storyline
and, like, a combo system and stuff like that.
So when I started playing H1Z1, I was just like,
this has got nothing to it.
It's super bare bones and I'm like
oh, dumb, dumb, dumb.
My trash talking is pretty good, I know.
So when it came
to the Battle Royale setting and realizing
how it's more of a social aspect game
that's when I was like, this is actually
fun to play based on that.
But sometimes I call it the running simulator
because you'll just be like, get to safe zone
and you have nobody with you and you just have to get to safe zone.
So you put on your like num lock or whatever you want to call it just to run
and you just kind of sit there and let yourself run.
But I've seen people do that with DayZ where it's a whole,
like they actually have a fight club thing to it too in DayZ
where they have the two people fight it out to see who survives
and like becomes part of the team.
It's weird.
I like those games.
Uh,
we played a ton of Daisy and I gotta say,
I really,
really fucking hate it.
It's,
uh,
we spent,
he got super addicted to it and it was always awful.
It was always awful.
It was like the worst drug ever.
It's very addictive and it sucks to do it.
Like,
like,
like you're always thinking about like how much fun this could be.
Like, you know what?
I just watched a new video.
This is going to be great.
First, we all got to meet up.
All right, so two and a half hours will pass.
And finally, we've all met up and we're all alive.
And one of us has a gun with bullets.
We're dead half an hour later.
I want us to be, if we could all spawn in like together and and and we
could all just have a bait a pistol just so that we're not just just just babes to the wolves or
at least give us a compass and like a map marker but so many of those servers like you have no idea
where you actually are there's the way we would navigate we would literally uh like find the sun and we would walk uh west until
we got to the ocean and then we'd walk north or south up and down the coast depending on what
color the leaves were because they were one color in the north and another in the south and try to
meet each other on the railroad tracks in between so either zombies or some other douchebag would
fucking kill you it was a nightmare and we spent hours and hours and hours playing this.
And I never want to do it again.
It pissed me off to no end.
And it was so easy for a good player
to like massacre all three of us too.
It happened.
Like there was a situation where we couldn't,
Woody, Chiz, and I couldn't decide
whether or not we wanted to befriend this guy or betray him.
And some of us betrayed and some of us didn't.
And we all got machine gunned to pieces and he took all of our things.
And I don't think I've really played too much since then.
I had a guy rape me, right?
He bound me up and he wanted me to like say sick and wrong things.
And he was, he was really fucked up.
Handcuff.
He handcuffed me.
I was so new to the game at the time.
I was like, is there some reason you're doing this to me?
Like, like I'm listening to this, just his side of it too.
It's pretty, it was pretty fun.
Yeah.
It was really fucked up.
I'm a little traumatized just thinking back of it too it's pretty it was pretty fun yeah it was really fucked up i'm a little traumatized just thinking back to it you know he's like forcing me to like do shit and i like i'm
resisting it and and um you know eventually i just chose death pretty much yeah because they've got
it's like real life they've got a gun and handcuffs and you're just you're just out there you might
have a t-shirt if you're lucky you might have a cool baseball cap or a motorcycle helmet, but that's not going to
get you any fucking wear. You need a shotgun and
bullets that'll fit it. It's rare.
If you don't know your way
around, like, I was just
wandering, quite honestly, from city to city
using a map off the internet, but
I could only find my way by
using actual real world
virtual world road signs.
So I'd see a road sign like, you know,
12 kilometers to a Russian name
that I can't pronounce or read
because I don't fucking read Cyrillic.
And, you know, you'd get there
and just match what the name looks like
to like an online map.
And then maybe you could navigate,
but I was just wandering from building to building
looking for weapons.
And I never,
I don't think I ever got a gun with bullets in it, ever ever maybe once but i think that chiz's killers gave it to me like
there were these two guys who killed chiz and then like i wandered upon the scene and they gave me
chiz's gun like yeah i was able to find guns with bullets a couple of times but um it just seemed
like i was never really i was never that alpha guy and the guys that like so bad that I
don't even even if you had had a machine gun I feel like it would have been a challenge to kill
someone yeah that's a normal h1z1 has that in the normal setting when it's only like there's pvp pve
and then battle royale and the pvp one is where you be more and like you have hydration you have
stamina that you'd all have to worry
about and eat things and
you know, act more like a person in that
sense of having to survive and
that's the same way of like having to meet up
and it's weird because it's a game that
essentially has no point, right?
And the only thing that makes it fun is the social
engagement and what people
decide to make of it.
I hate when they put too much shit in those games
where it's like oh you got to manage your hydration you got to manage your fucking hunger level oh you
got to eat enough fiber and shit regularly i hate that just let me play a game and not worry about
just expiring because i didn't drink enough daisy was supposed to be a zombie game like that was
as they built it or the guy built it
that was like his intention behind it of course it's really the zombies are just a minor little
backdrop like they're part of the map almost it's really a social interaction game yeah yeah yeah
in overpock the zombies are barely even relevant because people pull out like tricked out 45
pistols with silencers on them and they on them. And the zombies are gone and no more
zombies are attracted.
There's crazy weapons. I saw a guy with an
M107 Barrett
with explosive ammo.
He's shooting choppers out of the sky.
And they were doing the crazy stuff.
I guess there's one helicopter that
you could use in the game that's meant for
towing stuff. So they
attached a helicopter to a pickup truck
that had a ton of...
The truck has a lot of health,
so no matter how high you drop it from, it won't explode.
And so the helicopter's flying with the truck suspended beneath it,
and there's two guys in the back of the truck with M60 machine guns
just shooting people on the ground as they fly around.
That looked like a lot of fun.
But there's no way
I'll ever have that much fun playing that game
because it'll never happen for me the way
it does for them. It never goes that way.
It's essentially
to these people that go around
collecting all of the
best weapons in the game and they control
the game almost right how do they
sit there find that stuff so effectively like i played there was a guy who was just making loud
explosions as a way to attract idiots nearby like me and i'm like how did like how'd you get that
much dynamite i've never even seen dynamite in the game and you're wasting it on the off chance
that someone hears it well that was day z and I was confused about that, but in
Overpock, there's a whole economy
where you're building up
coins, like
money, and you can go to a
safe zone that's been built there where there's a whole economy.
You can buy vehicles, you can buy weapons,
and all that stuff.
I want Pay to Win DayZ. I swear I would
give a couple bucks to get some weapons
and then be able to play
that's what i want i want to win daisy yeah just just dude because i've got five dollars someone
hooked me up because you don't want to play a survival game and neither did i i wanted to play
the social interaction first person shooter game that i'd seen in you know played out in videos
where people are just it seems to me in my favorite
overpopped videos from YouTube that it's
a guy and his buddy, they meet
up and they end up in a scenario
where they're being sniped at or they're under fire
and they have to use teamwork and maybe
smoke grenades and explosives and
counter sniping and
stuff like that to out
flank the enemy, out think the enemy and it's
sort of, it's fun because you're playing against people who know what they're doing,
and there's a whole dynamic there that's interesting to watch play out.
And I keep wanting to do that, but to no avail.
I mean, I've paid money on those servers.
I can never get an admin to come on and give me the things that I paid for,
so I just gave up.
I just gave up.
My dream will never come true.
It's over. I'll just continue.. I just gave up. My dream will never come true. It's over.
I'll just continue. Oh, look at that. Four hours in.
Already?
Oh, I didn't know you had your four hour limit on the
group call. That's interesting.
Yeah.
Learn something new.
Do you want to call it?
Yeah, I think so.
Crunchyroll.com slash pka and Do you want to call it? All right. Yeah, I think so.
Wild card.
Crunchyroll.com slash PKA.
And be sure to check out our paintball event.
All right.
And check out Kat.
And Kat, thank you for coming.
Yeah. Thank you, guys.
All right.
That was fun.
PKA 224.