Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #251

Episode Date: October 15, 2015

This week on PKA, WickedShrapnel joins the guys and they talk about fast food, do some prank calls, Road to Black Ops 3 and what the guys would do if they were billionaires!

We're live! Episode 251 of Painkiller already. This episode of PK is being brought to you by our friends at Audible. Audible.com is the leading provider for premium digital spoken audio information and entertainment on the internet. So check them out, link in the description, and we'll talk more about them later in the episode. Yes, we will. Guests today, we've got Wicked Shrapnel with us. Thanks for coming. Hello. Thanks for having me. Yeah, it's been a while. How have you been? Doing good. Last time I was having me. Yeah, it's been a while. How have you been? Doing good.

Last time I was on was in February, maybe. I haven't been watching YouTube lately. What are you up to? Are you uploading all the time? I would say maybe three or four times a week. I've been playing a lot of Destiny, and it doesn't seem like... I built my channel on Call of Duty,

and those two don't seem to merge that well i don't think call of duty merges well with anything like call of duty fans are usually like hardcore call of duty fans and i was too so i understand like when i was hard into call of duty before ghost and advanced warfare we won't talk about that but i was just like that's all i wanted to play was Call of Duty all I wanted to watch is Call of Duty and so a lot of Call of Duty fans don't cross into other places I'm with you so I won't knock Advanced Warfare I haven't even played it totally uneducated by looking at the videos it looks like a decent game to me and it does doesn't it I I haven't seen people like I

know people hate on it because people hate on every cod but i feel like it's my impression from outside is that advanced warfare is pretty good but i hated ghost so much that i didn't buy the next one wow you get a lot of residual hatred yeah well advanced warfare i will say like the good things they've done they put a lot into the game to kind of keep it going like the gun releases and the different things that trying to keep it fresh but the core aspects of the game there was just a lot of things that i didn't like about it just how it played which they can't really change unless they recoded the whole game with the deal like with the gun releases it used to be like if you had that then you only played with the other people who had the dlc so you only

play against good players yeah is that still the way that happens well i haven't i've i've been looking at this from the outside trying so okay okay i haven't really been playing it that much my friend my friend jello's on name dropping woody he plays destiny too he made the same transition like he played cod all the time and now he's kind of a Destiny guy, I think. I'm a total addict. He has three level 35 characters or something like that? Does that mean anything to you? Well, they're up to 40's level cap now.

Oh, okay. And like 310 is the light level cap and I'm at like 307. So it's a grind to get all the gear to get up to like the max level yeah that's when i quit is i got like when it first came out i got to like level 20 and then i guess that's when it was like all right you can't just level up by having fun anymore now you have to you know spend 20 minutes searching through rubbish piles all over these goddamn planets for little things to make your gun a modicum better and then after 10 of those you might level up and it was like i'm not doing this this is a

chore this is like i'd rather go to the post office or get something actually done because that's what this feels like is that still what it is i heard they revised it to make it more fun i mean there is there is some of that still so special but they've made it more fun with like the quests so you have certain things that you have you have a checklist of what you need to do to get certain things done although there is still the randomness of getting certain gear to drop randomly like in the raid to be able to reach the max light level so it is a grinding game i can't judge too much i did spend countless hours on like three different skyrim characters just making iron daggers and leather straps

just so eventually i could you know get something that wasn't complete shit if you're not enjoying the the core aspects of the game then it can feel like a chore but if you just like playing then you know he said over and over he said something interesting cod channels not transitioning into anything else yeah it's it's you're right it's hard there's been people that done it like captain sparkles went to minecraft and i'm sure that was a hard transition manners transition to anything he wants to play right it's a nice transition if you can make it very smooth there's exceptions to the rule but all right you know what i was thinking about doing with my channel? It's a rip off of someone else's idea, so I'll fully admit that. But I've been flat out inspired by the Vlogbrothers.

Does anyone here watch them too? I haven't heard of them. No? Okay. They're a popular channel. And they're wildly successful. Like some of the most successful people on YouTube. There was a a movie a fault in our stars have you heard of that yes okay it was like a top of the chart or whatever one of

the vlog brothers wrote that um okay there was another one called paper towns that was out just recently he wrote that uh his brother is writing a book i think and um you know so the others were books that turn into movies they're wildly successful. And they often talk about things that are complicated. And it seems like sort of the transition that maybe I could make. Like my YouTube channel, while it was a COD channel, it was often not about COD, right? It was like Mail Monday stuff. I remember I talked about Google's business strategy and becoming an ISP. I'd have these Tech Tuesday type things where I'm diving into the details of, you know,

PlayStation 4 versus Xbox on the rumors and E-Prom and whatever. But just having Call of Duty in the background made it a Call of Duty channel. Exactly. You know, then I had some COD stuff. I gave some tips early on when people still benefited from them.

I felt like after a while everyone got so good it was difficult to give tips. And then I had dissecting the greats and stuff like that. like after a while everyone got so good it was difficult to give tips um and then uh i had dissecting the greats and stuff like that but uh but by and large every video was like and this one's not about the gameplay and i would kick it off um i thought about doing that again for this release of cod like i'll fire it up again but it appears that cod's just gone you know the community's not popular anymore. Well, it just seems about

how the person ran their channel. Like you said, with, like, SeaNanners or CaptainSparklez, they transition, but it's only the COD channels where the content wasn't like, all right, you're going to get to B-flag within three seconds

and then throw a semtex this way. Like, all those ones seem to be falling by the wayside. Like, only the ones where it's personality-driven or topic-based, and it's personality driven or topic based and it's like i'm playing you know domination we're not going to talk about it because it doesn't matter like those ones seem to be but there are still like call of duty news type channels

ali-a is still very successful in call of duty so i mean it can happen but it seems like there's not as many of them they've kind of people have focused on a few channels that they go to for those kind of things and other channels kind of fell by the wayside when i when i daydream of the videos i make it's usually like a high production quality vlog you know with actual studio lighting and a good camera and you know you sit down in there your little chair where you're supposed to be talking and doing your thing. That's what I think I'd like to do. But we'll see.

Did you play the Black Ops 3 beta? No. Yeah, I wanted to. I was really interested in it. People even gave me codes, and if you gave me one, I'm really grateful. In spite of the fact I didn't use it, it meant a lot to me that people thought of me. You're welcome.

Kyle gave me some. Yeah, yeah, another guy got some PC ones, et cetera. But then we went on this survival trip and we came back and the beta was over like so we were like out of just bad timing yeah it i did i didn't enjoy it it sort of ended on me i enjoyed i got a chance yeah i uh i played um i got a level 15 or 17 something like that so you know not an expert by any means but i really enjoyed the new aspects of the game i like the underwater thing i like being able to shoot the guns underwater that was cool i didn't realize well i pulled the trigger out of instinct but i didn't expect the gun to shoot and i you know killed a guy with a shotgun underwater that's cool um and i don't even know what it's called but there's sort of a kill streak

the special abilities and like i use the one with the uh it's called, but there's sort of a kill streak built in. The special abilities. The special abilities. And I use the one with the... It's like a six-barrel grenade launcher, and each round splits off into three more and explodes like a cluster bomb. And I'm just spamming that thing, just having a great time. How much time is there? A lot of that, like the supers are from Destiny. David Von Der Haar is a big Destiny fan,

so I think that he was inspired by Destiny for a lot of that like the supers are from destiny david von der har is a big destiny fan so i think that he was inspired by destiny for a lot of that stuff a lot of people hate on cod for that like there's halo aspects that are you know inspired by halo and and but i feel like if you can rule any advancement completely off limits for being you know replicated then you're gonna hold gaming back right i like that they take good things that people like about other games and incorporate them in their game. Like the Titanfall wall running is in the Black Ops 3.

The Destiny Supers are the Black Ops 3. I'm sure that they wouldn't say that they were inspired by those, but that's where it came from. I thought the wall running was really intuitive and easy to do. I fell the first time I tried to go between that wall where there's a drop off on the bottom. But the second time I had it, and I don't think I fell again.

Titanfall is an interesting... I enjoyed it. I can't think of a game that had more hype and interest that has fallen off a cliff faster than Titanfall. That was a three-week game. It just wasn't big enough, I think. There was a limited amount of guns with a limited type of gameplay that you could do and after you did it so many times it just kind of felt like oh i've been here done this and whereas call of duty it almost feels like a sport where you know

people don't get sick of playing football you've been playing football for 20 years don't you get sick of that game you know like no yeah i agree completely yeah i hope i'm a little worse so i was never the best player but in spite of all the fussing i was actually good i didn't say great but i was good you know if you were playing you probably want me on your team you know if we're in a pub or something like you'd rather have me on your side than the other. I was definitely a positive player. And I played objectives and it helped. I'm worried that if I come back now. Like the Advanced Warfare had the boost. I've never played that.

There's wall running. There's boosting. It's not too hard to pick up I don't think. I'm afraid I'll get a suck. You'd pick it up. I enjoyed it. I felt like one of the things. You can do it.

You can like strafe you can like strafe slide so like if there's a corridor and you're like waiting on the guy to come through the corridor and you know you normally expect him to walk through or maybe jump through and drop shot now you can come in you can come down that corridor

literally sliding on your ass or something sideways like boosting by while aiming at the guy. It's impossible to deal with that. There's a bit of a skill advantage there. Plus the way the lag goes. He knows before you do because he's the mover. Yeah.

There's just the right amount of chaos in the game to make it interesting. Grenades are great. I thought the grenade explosive range or power or whatever you want to call it was perfect. We were actually getting kills. Wings of Redemption had a complaint that was a compliment in my head. He said that the maps are kind of small and a little chaotic and such, which made me think

Black Ops 2. Black Ops 2, in my head, had beautiful maps. I like that. Black Ops 2 was not a hiking simulator. You got into the action and it happened in a hurry, and it was cool I'm hoping they take a different path with zombies for this one like still the big elaborate maps but they take a step back away from like

The you have to go through three hours of solving these random riddles to get the special gun Yeah, I hate that the staff in that need a guy riddles to get the special gun or the staff in that big guy. Honestly, every time I would play it the first time, I'd need to work with a friend who somehow figured all this shit out right away or had a YouTube video going.

I think it was me and you and your girlfriend and maybe some guy that was helping us one night. What system are you on? Xbox. Perfect. And PlayStation 4. But people love the Easter eggs. Oh, wait, you don't have the Xbox one?

I do. Oh, good. Yeah, I'm with you. What's the cowboy one? Oh, the cowboy one? The Wild West where you had the bank? Yes, and the witches. That one was...

That was my favorite one ever. Yeah, it was way too easy once you got going with that special weapon because it never ran out of ammunition, and you could just jump and float over barriers and then give yourself like three minutes before the zombies could run around the whole map to catch you. Yeah, that was a really fun one. That one with the robot was impossible.

I played it almost exclusively in groups of four, so one guy would have that gun, but it took a lot of teamwork to also be protected by be protected by it but um uh yeah i i that was my favorite one ever i think i maxed out my bank pretty early throughout the playing of that and so every time i played it was like oh i hope i can save up enough oh no wait i'll just run to the bank and take out 30 000 points and then buy everything on turn three like i kind of made it not fun, but I liked it. It's fun to be OP. I always had a good time with it.

I'm definitely down to play some zombies whenever it comes out. I always like the zombies, but you've got to have people to play with. It's no fun by yourself. It's especially not fun to play pub zombies most of the time because there's always like if you see like xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx, xxxx if you see like triple x sniper six triple x and

triple x sniper six triple x parentheses one or whatever it's like oh well fuck you know i've stumbled into a fifth grade sleepover and they're not gonna do well like guaranteed they're gonna be doing and you don't know if they like when i go to play zombies it's like all right this is what i'm doing for the night the next maybe four or five i don't care if it's six hours like if it's six hours and we're still going we're on like level 80 90 or something i'll keep playing i'm not gonna stop till we die i don't know if they have that same amount of dedication no they have bedtime you know i have bedtime they got it the one issue i have with zombies is i'm never quite sure like what the correct level of selfishness is. If you play with Mercadurka, I will tell you,

whatever that skill goes up to, he plays at 100 selfishness. He doesn't pick you up unless he is positive. A zombie won't touch him even once. If there's kills to be had, he will stake out that spot. You know in the beginning, the very beginning when everyone's like knifing windows, he will steal your zombies right in front of what is clearly your window. Taylor – Taylor's got eight kills. Yeah, yeah.

All across the board. And, you know, like there's – you look at the bank accounts, it's like 6,100, 100, 1,400. He's like, Kyle, would you get that door for 1,200? Hey, I don't do that do i do take a lot of the kills but if i've got way more points i will buy the doors so way more maybe i don't know he plays in more points full selfishness taylor plays at full selfishness all the time and um i err in the other direction too much too much yeah like much. I will pick you up. I am coming to save you.

I am Captain Hero. It's my favorite thing in all of video games is to be the guy. It's like to be the man that saves it. That saves the day. But sometimes I'll die picking a guy up when I would have been smarter to clear out more. You have to tactically let people die.

If it's early in the game and they don't have anything and you could lose it it's like just let them die what are they going to lose 60 points it doesn't matter playing with Woody on a map that he doesn't know in zombies is like you're back to back firing off you know getting a bunch of points and then you turn around and Woody like a 3 year old at the mall

you're like oh god where did he go what has he done and then you just see that little icon pop up woody's gamer tag is down pick me up pick me up it's always fun though and i am a bit of a slow learner like there are other people who have like some kind of like zombie sixth sense the guys who figure out those easter eggs and know the maps and such and i like i'm i really need my handheld I would never figure those out on my own some of them are so complex

it's just silly yeah it like it's a turnoff like I remember watching syndicates videos teaching you how to it was the map with the bus that goes from fiery gas station to fiery gas station or whatever and he's going these got like a 20 minute video teaching you how to do this thing and like 10 minutes into it I'm like I don't want it that bad. I don't want it this bad. Like I just really don't. I'm out.

Was it called Dead Town or something? What was the one with the Wild Wild West? Did you ever do the Easter egg with all the orbs and stuff? Oh, yeah. It takes hours. And there's aspects of it that like take a lot of skill to do. It's not just a knowledge Easter egg. You have to do shit in a certain amount of time

or catch butterflies in the air or shit. I forget how it worked. You have to grab... I don't even remember. Remember the one out in the big open trench warfare style field with the giant robots walking around? Yeah. I got smashed by that robot many times.

I played that for hours with a guide played that for hours with like a guide teaching us how to do the things. And still, like, there were those staffs, but there was this thing where you'd like,

only every now and then would this plane fly over and you had to shoot the plane and then it would drop a thing and you had to pick that up and do a thing with it.

But that's just one little piece and there's five more pieces and that's just to get one thing done. And it's just like, no, I just wanted to shoot the zombies it was ridiculous i remember that night me kyle melissa and jordan the guy who would learn everything right away and help us we got to like round 21 with no special stuff and we're like we want we want the staffs we want the staffs he's like all right how much time you guys got it's like we can do this all night and so we just

for probably two two and a half hours one of us would take turns babysitting the zombie and he'd be like all right we got to run to the complete opposite side of the map you're going to see a chest you're going to knife it three times not four not two three then pop out you're going to grab it then you're going to go hope for a plane can take 15 20 sometimes half an hour for it to show up you shoot that then you're going to wait for the zombies or the robot to come by Only step under the one with the white light on the bottom of its foot. Otherwise, you'll die and we have to start this over It's like oh my god. We spent two hours until all the

Figure that out. It's because they don't give you a guide No, that was let down the staff was a letdown Oh, I don't think I had like a top-tier staff I had like a mid-grade staff like not the worst one, but certainly not the best. But still, it was like this is a power weapon. We had shit to do the next day and we didn't have time to go get it upgraded. Because you have to upgrade it afterward.

And it takes even longer. You know what was a letdown? Alcatraz, right? I think that was the map name. It was Alcatraz and you could assemble a plane and fly it off. And I literally thought I was gonna win zombies for the first time in my life I was like yeah and it might have even been Taylor I forget who was my guy but it might have been Taylor who showed me how to uh like build

the plane and fly off in Alcatraz and it's basically another transporter you just land somewhere else and keep playing yeah you land somewhere else and there is a way to win in that one but it's borderline impossible i've never won then yeah it's like an easter egg to win where but you have to have like i think either three or four people and only one party can win because like the rat turns on you in the end and you have to kill whatever player is playing the rat and if you do that you can win and it counts the other guys a win but it's just like, really? I don't even build a plane on that map because it's a shit show. It takes forever.

I'm looking forward to this. I'm looking forward to seeing what's new in Zombies. Oh yeah, me too. It's going to be fun. I think I agree. We're all in agreeance that what we don't want is a puzzle. And we really don't want a puzzle that's... Alright, some puzzle stuff. It's okay to have that stuff as an addition,

but not be needed to just play it. Yeah, to get the cool weapon, you don't want it to be integral, that you do some goofy puzzle. Now, I'm told, someone in the comments will correct me if I'm wrong, I'm sure, but isn't the Xbox One going to be 960p

and the PS4 going to be 1080p? Probably. I don't know. Makes no difference to me. I don't have a PlayStation 4, and I'll play on the Xbox. I like that controller way more. You like the PS4 more? I transitioned to PS4.

I had a lot of problems with my Xbox One and just the party's chat system. I've even gone back. I played the beta on it, and the beta for Black Ops 3 crashed almost constantly. I had to create a new account with no friends on it. There was all this different stuff you had to do to get the beta to even play, which people were saying,

well, it's a problem with the beta, but I played the beta on PS4, and I didn't have those kind of problems. Yeah, I had lots's a problem with the beta but i played the beta on ps4 and i didn't have those kind of problems yeah i had lots of connectivity issues with the beta i have both i don't even know what i have i have two or three xbox ones i know one still in the box and i think i have two ps4s but i've never turned them on so they're all neither of them you never played xbox one or ps4 no i have played Xbox One. Because Ghost looked better on it. But I have an Xbox One that's in the box from a sponsor deal or something.

I don't know. I've got what I need. I'll just put them in this rack and we'll set them all up and it'll be cool. I like the PS4 way more. I must have had to uninstall and reinstall NHL 15 on my Xbox One like six times that's

not good when does the game come out and usually no this no November oh yeah I think you're right there's a fifth really so November that's it's like a right at a month yeah she plays Nazi zombies we should uh we should maybe try every six one sixth Friday you should do a road to what's this game called black like apps 3 road to black ops 3 see if we could bribe some the economy's better now than it was back when we were trying to the old days I feel like nowadays the GameStop guys but yeah fuck this shit, bro. Give me $100.

Because of the better economy, you think, oh, they won't care about their jobs. Get a new job. Go out, go down the street and go to GameFly, some other place. You know, Walmart or something. See, I'll tell you, you gotta follow through on this stuff, though.

You're often the first one to make the promises that the fans really, really want. Oh, I'm making no promise. I'm just saying we should do it. I'll do it. I mean, you call often the first one to make the promises that the fans really, really want. Oh, I'm making no promise. I'm just saying we should do it. I'll do it. I mean, you call them right now. We'll talk to them. I mean, that's fine with me.

Like, those are easy. I feel like the Giddings. I was literally about to call them right now, but it's October. It's a month in advance. Like, they don't have it. You know, maybe we can get a guy in line. Just look at it like a week before. As soon as this thing gets there. I I need a copy I need you to make that

happen I need some overnight shipping you can call and build some rapport with the stockroom guy you know get a like that oh hey Kyle how's it going still got those games for you seven of them right advanced warfare and eBay for like 120 bucks120 a week early. This is going to mess up the formatting so cut me some slack everybody. That's alright. Oh, before we move on to the next

topic, just a quick thing. So I am starting up YouTube a bit again doing my own podcast over on my channel so follow the link over there if you want to check it out. Who knows what topics will come up. It's going to be a lot of fun. You guys should all come. So see you there.

By the time you see this, it should be up on my channel. Because this goes up on Saturday. Yeah. That'll be fun. Yeah, I'm looking forward to it. Just shooting the shit by myself again. Weekly? It will be.

It will be weekly. I think you should smoke a cigarette like... Kyle, take it day. Weekly? Uh, it will be. It will be weekly. I think you should smoke a cigarette like, uh... Kyle, take it away. GameStop. I'm calling GameStop plus Cricker where you can now pre-order Assassin's Creed Syndicate for the search. How can I help you? I don't want that game.

So, what's the, the new Call of Duty that comes out next month? That's what I'm interested in. Uh, the Call of Duty comes out November 6th. Ah, that's, see, that's a because I'm going to be flying out of the country just at the end of this month and I want to get the game before I go. When do you guys actually get the game in your possession there at the store? Do they ship them there before the release date or how does that work? It would be the 5th because we will probably be having a midnight launch

until the 5th. You only get it a day before the street release? Well see that's no good. How could I get it like a week early? How do you make that happen? Uh, that wouldn't be possible through uh... Oh, it's possible! But how do we make it happen? I need you to put your thinking cap on here. See I've done this before and you

gotta... there's all kind of nefarious ways. I've given hand jobs, I've given cash. Whatever it takes, I'll make it happen. So, um, do you have any serious questions? I've given hand jobs, I've given cash. Whatever it takes, I'll make it happen. I have a very serious question. I want this game early. I'm willing to pay you if there's some way that you can help me arrange that. Or provide sexual favors, whatever you'd like. Do you know what a rusty trombone is? Oh, come on!

is come on don't I don't think he's gonna help you do you guys know what a rusty phone is unfortunately do the guys ass while you jerk him off, like in the trombone. Some things you just can't undo. All right, who wants the next one? That's one of them I wish I could. Who wants the next one? That was a good one. All right, I'll do it. I'll do it. Okay.

All right. Can you... I'm sorry. I called it. Instead of adding it to the call, I made a mistake. I need to try again. Alright. I follow. Alright. All is forgiven. That worries me that he's claiming

only a day before street release. I feel like maybe Best Buy might be the... I like Best... I hope he lies. Thanks for calling GameStyle. We're buying some of your games. This is Edwin speaking. Hey, Edwin.

How are you? Pretty good. How are you? I'm good. I'm good. So I'm looking to get Black Ops 3 early. And I'm calling around seeing, you know, who can work with me on this. Early? You mean like before the release date? Yes, that's exactly.

I'm glad you and I are connecting on this. It's something we can't do, unfortunately. Well, I mean, we can't do it. Like I know GameStop doesn't do it, but you might do it, right? Like maybe you and I can work something out. No, we can't, man. So, when does GameStop get't do it, but you might do it, right? Like maybe you and I can work something out. No, we can't, man. So when does GameStop get the game? You going to have it like maybe three days early, five days early?

It all depends on shipments. I mean, I've seen sometimes we get our games like the day of or the day before. But there's street data, so where we have a box, we can't open until the day of. Well, yeah, I mean, you can't open. I mean, that's... What is this, Indiana Jones is going to melt my face? Tell that man to get me a video game, Woody. So you can see I've got pressures on me.

I work with a number of large YouTubers, and these guys need to get the game early as a competitive advantage, and they will do literally anything. They will pay big bucks. They will provide you things that you might want. I don't know. I don't know what you're driving right now. Maybe something better could happen.

No, man. I just got this job, and that's something that can easily cost me the job. It's a GameStop job, though, right? You could get another job just as good. Okay. How does six copies at $100 a copy sound? If you can get it three days early. Yeah, it's going to be a no.

I don't think like, yeah, it's just a no, man. $125 a copy? You can try mom and pop shots, but it's not going to happen here. Why, you know, I've often had no luck at GameStop. What is so wonderful about this place? No one will risk their job for a GameStop to help us out, to get a little bonus on the side. Well, I mean, do you have anything else you want to ask? Or you're only asking about that?

Are you asking me on a date? That's a crime that's against the law, and that's something I can go to prison for. It's totally not. It's not a crime. It's not a crime. It's just a rule, right? This is just a guideline, street date.

And he hung up on me. Guys, you know, he could go to prison for this. What law? Like, yo, what are you in here for? Oh, I sold Black Ops 3 on November 1st. Let's throw him in the kid kitty diddler section law enforcement agency is running around handling that like Johnson and Johnson and Peters we're from the video game enforcement agency out of here asshole you don't

have a time what's that a tinto blaster you got on your side yeah that one yeah also no but really unless it's a mom- and pop shop, I think he's right. GameStop is never going to help. See, I keep hearing about this mom and pop shop. Yeah, I went to the mom and pop. What is that? Where are their privately owned video game stores? I don't know.

I've never encountered that. There are mom and pop board game stores around here. There's that one website that's notorious for selling the games early that everyone suggested. It was like Super Toys or something like that. You can check Silk Road. We should start our own game distribution thing. PKA should distribute games. It should be like ShadyGameStop.org or something.

Send us the game. We'll honor street date. Sure, we will. I just, man, he really broke out the big guns of excuses right away with prison. He didn't say, like, honestly, I'm over this. Yeah, I never had my opportunity. Like, I used to offer him, like, salsa and sexual favors and shit like that. This guy, like, I don't know know I wasn't getting any bounce back from him

I am very loyal employees that's why I feel like Walmart's always a group what could you offer them up what about a job what if you offer them a job with you like look man we got this racket together we're selling these games for $500 a pop I'll give give you $250 a pop. Let's make this happen. We can make some money here. Give you $150 a copy for the game and I'll get you two years Costco

membership. I should offer him a job at Woodycraft. I run a small video game distribution company. We distribute games and we also have escorts. So I think maybe you can help me out with some games, and I'll help you out with one of the ladies. Chandra, Chandra, get over here.

And then like, she's totally, oh. I could get Jackie over here just for a female voice. What? What do you want? Think she'd play along? 50-50. I don't know. Jackie would not feel comfortable doing that i

don't know probably not but taylor's girl might hey hey jackie like you're a prostitute so we can get some video games oh this won't this won't come back to her at open high school at all now i know this is a silly question because we both know but you can't act like a whore right yeah no i feel like i feel like gamestop employees have taken a blood oath or something like that like they're more honorable than ned stark over there when it comes to those video games and street date so maybe we should do some research into like mom and pop stores but i've always felt like the walmart employee is like the easiest attempt like i've talked to those guys in person and been like i felt like i was this close from like getting them to go in the back and do

something nefarious before they are not getting paid well we need to wait at the least two weeks before pursuing this further, I think, because I don't think any of these people know shit about when they're going to get it. What's the standard tenure of a GameStop employee? Did any of these people even work here last year when they were getting the game?

He said he just started. I just got this job. Yeah. How attached to it can you ever be? Or maybe he's in high school or something. That would be shitty to lose that. I could call a Walmart. Yeah, let's call a Walmart. All right.

Who's going to do it? I could either try and redeem myself, or we could hand it off to another guy. Kyle's going to be silly. I want to see Woody actually, because you're going to be the best at actually getting someone to give us the game. Not historically, but we'll see how this goes. I don't even answer the phones. That's typical Walmart. I never do. This is normal.

You should ask who's working in like one department and then be like, okay, thank you. And then have them connect you to a different department. I think. Hello? Hey, how are you? Is Jamal there? Is Jamal working tonight? Electronics?

Thanks. Look, Jamal worked at my house. He was an eight-time felon. It was worth a try. Electronics. Hey, how are you? This is Woody. Who am I speaking to?

Jessica. Hey, Jessica. Jessica, look, I'm trying to get Black Ops 3 early. What date will Walmart get a game like that? How many days in advance of release gamers are all gone home huh and I'm not the gamer so I have no idea when we're releasing that I'm not I'm not even sure and I don't know there's nobody else over here that would know that So, I don't know.

It's probably going to be probably after GameStop because we seem to get things late in here. Now, I'm betting that goes the other way. I'm betting that you get this game and it sits on a pallet for a couple of days before you release it.

No, actually. We have a release date on every box we get. And if it's not the release date, then we don't put it out. But we get our new movies and everything every day. The only day we don't put things out is on Sunday. See, now that's what I'm talking about. There must be a way for you and I to work this out so that I can get it before release date, right?

You know when they're sitting in the back and there's a release date on there? Oh, no, we are not allowed to. Yeah, I know you're not allowed, but I'm trying to work out something just between you and I, Jessica. I can't. Jessica, you really don't need to worry. I don't even know if we had that at all yet. This is Woody's representative, Cliff Hutchinson, attorney at law. I specialize in release date law.

Honestly, it's a lot of red tape, but for the most part, it's not going to be anything you can't get by. It happens all the time. This gentleman here that I represent is more than happy to pay you double, maybe triple the value of the game if you're willing to work with him a little bit.

And I guarantee you, class of 98, Harvard law, specializing in video game release dates you have no concerns well i know that i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i i it there won't be any repercussions hell if they try and fire you i'd be happy to take your case okay but i i'm letting you know i have i don't know when that game is coming in so well i'm not even the one to be talking to about it that's why we're calling early we're trying to set up a contract inside walmart who can let us know when you do get the game okay well i you'd want to talk to my department manager about that. Is she shady?

We're looking for somebody shady. What was that? I said, is she shady? We're looking for somebody shady. Yeah, that's not me. All right, all right, Jessica. Now, let's say hypothetically you're working at Walmart, right, and you're trying to score pot.

Which of your coworkers would you go to? Yeah. You got a guy in your head. You got a guy in your head, Jessica, and you're like would you go to? Yeah, I have. You got a guy in your head. You got a guy in your head, Jessica, and you're like, oh yeah. Yes, you do. Yes, you do. Which one of your coworkers do you think could find pot?

And then transfer me to that guy, please. Oh, no. Say, oh, you're looking for Michael. Let me transfer you. Jessica, work with me here I got money oh my goodness Taylor you did

wonderfully just gonna be willing to take your kids special video game release dates this is going to be a good year for prank calls. And I'd be happy to take the case. That's pretty good. I like that. You're arguing semantics here, Jessica. Yeah.

Don't be coy with me. Well, in two weeks, I think we might actually get... We should do some research on mom and pop stores near where you're located, if there are any. Yeah. There are mom and pop stores that do that. They if there are any yeah there are mom and pop they make money be the earliest it's gonna be anywhere maybe uh oh there's a few factors I guess like I don't know where they distribute these things like where are they actually stamping out the disc and and like where from that

facility like cuz you know if you've got a Walmart right next door to the facility I would imagine that they're getting them first right like it's across the street from the district the distributor like wherever they're stamping them out that might be so maybe a major city is a good place to be um i'll look for some mom and pop style stores in atlanta i remember that time i was listening to some prank phone calls we'd done in the past the other day and i had called that uh that porn distributor and started asking him about the panda porn and he likes he's like oh yeah i don't have any of that you got to go to like a swap shop or something like that you gotta go one of those pc uh things and you know then you can get it you got to get it there and hey the porn like that exists like

people fucking pandas yeah yeah oh i just assumed it was the opposite. What does that say about me? Either way. Oh, they fuck the pandas? I'm out. I'm no longer interested in panda porn now that it's people fucking bears. I thought it was an erotic kind of film of pandas making love. No. When you see dog porn, the dog's not on the receiving end on this stuff.

I don't see that kind of video. You do, yeah. They actually put socks on the dog's paws because they grabbed the woman's hips so aggressively. Well, you know, imagine the learning curve there. Someone had to figure that out. That happened once and they just had to go to a pool party and they're like, Jesus, what happened to you? You know, just a game of tag got out of hand.

Yeah, yeah. So now they put, like, wool socks or mittens on the dogs, and they can grab the woman's hips, and she's no worse for wear. Wow. Yeah, good times. That's horrific. Hey, I have a new topic. Sure.

Okay. So there was an on Reddit, an explain it like I'm five on morning wood. Would you guys like to know about morning wood? Sure. Who wouldn't, right? It's old enough now. All right. Here's a scoop.

Men has several nighttime erections. On average, a healthy man has three to five erections during a full night's sleep, with each erection lasting 25 to 35 minutes. It's common for men to wake up with an erection informally called morning glory or wood. This is, in fact, the last of a series of nighttime erections. During the sleep cycle, the extra blood increases oxygenation, and it serves as a repair and helps maintain functionality. Morning wood is just a remnant of REM sleep, which is why men wake up with erections. Now, here's an interesting part.

Just like men, the absence of nireprophene during REM phase of the sleep causes erections. In women, this phenomenon is called nocturnal penile tumulescence in men. In women, not only the clitoris gets engorged with blood, but the vagina too. And I've heard that's called morning dew. Wow. No one calls it that. Of the fact that I've been married for 20 years, I didn't know about morning dew wow in no way it calls it that of the fact that i've been married for 20 years i didn't know about morning dew i've heard of it i'm glad you said that i really felt like i

i was sure kyle was gonna be like yes i learned about morning dew when i was seven i i've known that women have wet dreams forever so um i did but i didn't know that they woke up all lubed and ready to go I don't think that's the same extent it's not really the same it's I knew that women woke up in a state of arousal I knew that just like occasionally or every day every other day depending what time I woke up I need to get like standing penetration approval so I can just stick it in there while she's sleeping.

Right? Like, just test out the old morning dew. Get a little contract signed. Yeah, some sort of rape allowance. Yeah, right? If you can't rape your wife, who can you rape? Right? Yeah.

That's what the Old Testament says. Pre-consensual. Pre-consensual. Yeah. Pre-consensual. That's awful. yeah that's what the old testament says so yeah yeah i just i need to i need to get allowance on this thing and then um and then we can just check out how morning do really works i'll report back you can just wake up like 15 minutes before her every morning just go exploring very deftly. Attack. You know? Uh huh. Yeah. Sleepy sideways doggy style.

Just tell her it's for science. No that'll, that's a definition. No. Not a turn on. But honey I got the camera set up and everything. I'm doing research. I'm doing research. This is 120 frames per second.

This is gonna be amazing. Don't, don't, don't shift. You're in frame. You know. I'm doing research. This is 120 frames per second. This is going to be amazing. Don't shift. You're in frame. I feel like I've never done it with the high speed functionality of my phone or anything, but with the high speed functionality of Woody's FS 700, I think it's called,

I bet you could make some outstanding pornography. I bet a cum shot in like 500 frames per second would just be outstanding. It'd be beautiful. Yeah, you get the lighting just right. It'd be too long. No, it's never too long. You're halfway through that shot and it's like, alright. You don't sound like a proper cum shot

aficionado. I don't know that you appreciate... You're not the connoisseur that Kyle and I are of the arcing cum shot. I'd be connoisseur and watch that thing for 20 minutes you guys are like trajectory whores bullshit get out of here no not enough arc on that one

this guy's ejaculate is like a shack free throw not enough air time trying to take mosquitoes out flying around the room fuck em wait that's what you've been doing going after mosquitoes with your ejaculate? Yeah, since a child. You know.

Yeah. And you must always be bone dry. You're in Georgia. Your hand-eye coordination, a number of other skills. It's very important. That's impressive. I have here Woody's Gamertag's flamethrower. How awesome is this? It's way smaller than the other one he has and it's got those World War one fighter

Do I knock your flamethrowers? No, it's on the way to work can you know what it is. It's much smaller. It's like a concealed weapons permit Flamethrower, so you were saying what are these components? I'm not familiar with this flamethrower boot flamethrower. So you were saying... What are these components? I'm not familiar with this flamethrower build. So... He has another one that's more loaded. He will show you. This is mine.

So you've got your... Oh, that's sharp. So you've got your fuel here. Gasoline, alcohol, or diesel, or a mixture of diesel and gasoline. That's what I've been using. Is this something you've built? No. This is the XM42 flamethrower.

They are $900. Wow. You've got a butane can here to... And you've got an on-off switch over here. Are you going to spark it up in the house? I am. As you do. And on the back switch over here. Are you going to spark it up in the house? I am. As you do.

And on the back, there's an igniter. Wow. So if I were to press this button, I would shoot napalm inside my house. Because you keep this thing... Well, that's an easy investigation. I like to keep it loaded at all times, just in case. Like, if there were to be an intruder right now,

like, I could just totally hose him down over there and you just hear the screams, but... Oh, my God. And it's excellent for home defense because it doesn't over-penetrate. Like, a normal gun might go through the wall and hit someone on the other side, right? This one stops at the first wall.

Oh, you have the best toys. I know. It makes me so jealous. I'm so excited. That's awesome. It was a really good day when I found out that that thing was coming. What's the range on that compared to the big one? It's very similar. So the big one kind of works like a pressure washer because it is a pressure washer wand and it kind of makes a cloud of fire out in front of you.

And the range with like diesel and gasoline, just regular liquid that you haven't thickened up with napalm mixture is like 25 feet. The same is true with this one because this one, instead of shooting like a dispersing and sort of shooting a cloud that's atomized, it kind of just squirts gasoline or whatever fuel you're using in a really narrow stream I don't know if you can see how yeah small that aperture is that hole But it's a lot smaller the super soaker flaming death laser yes When you said it shoots today check it out when you said it shoots a stream because it really what i intend to use it for is starting fires in the backyard i have a fire pit and uh and i stack the logs up i coat it with gas i light it and then instant fire that's

my typical process and i do it a couple times a week if this thing kyle was like it shoots a stream and then it instead of just going away in a puff of a cloud like a week if this thing kyle was like it shoots a stream and then it instead of just going away in a puff of a cloud like a normal flamethrower the thing that you just shot tends to stay on fire for a little bit right this is perfect yeah this is perfect for like you know we have a fire outside a couple times a week is this for entertainment purposes or like cleaning up brush or yard home defense defense. All of those things. All of those things. Yeah, we have.

So we have a dumpster in the backyard. And in that we put all the things you wouldn't want to burn, like roofing shingles, some sheet goods and stuff like that. But we also have like two by sixes and two by fours and stuff. And as Dr. Chiz describes it, we use nature's dumpster, the sky. Chiz describes it. We use nature's dumpster, the sky. It's gone! It's gone!

Nature's dumpster. Here's the funniest thing. But we do it. We enjoy fires. We have these porch swings in a big circle around the fire pit, and we light the fire and we hang out there instead of watching TV. That's cool. So does that make your face less hot because it doesn't come out in a big billow?

Yeah, it's not nearly as hot. It's a lot easier on you when you're operating it. And it's a lot more compact. Everything's right there in your hands. It's definitely a higher-grade build. The welds and stuff, I'll show you. Well, the other one is just what you get at a car wash to spray mud off your tires.

That looks legit. Exactly. The other one is sort of assembled components, and this one is really handmade. The bracket that holds this butane canister on here, this thing, is all custom. And it's well made. Machine.

It uses an electric motor that you charge up. There's a charging wire that tucks away that you just charge that up with. And that pressurizes the fuel and shoots it. You should have a coupon code. I will have one, I believe. Coupon code first degree. Third degree. This is not safe.

Third degree, yeah. Not with Kyle. He's kind of safe. He's got his Ghostbusters outfit. Yeah. I got to go wrong. That's really neat. We still have your eyebrows.

That's good. You need to step up your game until you're hairless. You need a bigger flamethrower than that to take these eyebrows down. Has everyone seen The Martian or has anyone seen The Martian? I have not. I just saw it two nights ago. I saw it on opening day, I think. Saw it last night.

I'm the only one. Great. I'm the odd one out. I don't spoil it. I don't care. Yeah, I don't know. i'll start not spoiling um in my opinion the videography broke new ground in movies like i was i was telling chiz like you know if you thought that gravity looked good you're a virgin until you've seen martian like what seems to be worth going to like IMAX to see it

I think so I see Kyle thinking it over um um I don't think their space uh stuff was as good as Interstellar space stuff like when like when Matthew McConaughey was having to match the rotation of that thing

and like the ship it was like spinning faster and he's like we gotta do 60 RPM they're like. He was spinning faster. He's like, we gotta do 60 RPM. They're like, it can't go that fast. He's like, it has to. He just fucking does it anyway. You're rolling your eyes. I was yawning in that scene. I thought it was so stupid.

You were wrong. No, everybody. Thank God it's a Lincoln. Everybody loves that scene. That's like the heart-pounding scene. That's such a huge moment in that movie. I thought it was good. I thought their space stuff was good. You know, it wasn't...

I don't think it was as good as Interstellar's, but their planet stuff, you know, when he was on Mars, and I watched it in 3D and the bigger size screen, not the IMAX, but it was 72 feet wide and 40 feet high.

The screen was. Sounds big. Yeah. I don't know how big my screen was. It was a movie theater. It's like mini IMAX. It was, exactly. It was beautiful though. The Martian landscape was incredible.

And I don't think it's a spoiler to say you know he's on the planet for quite some time and he loses some weight and i was wondering when i saw his weight loss if that was cgi or real weight loss that's gotta be cgi right it's a different actor they did no they didn't even show his face being that skinny like he had the beard after all that time which hid the fact that he would have been emaciated and when he walked out like when they first showed him all skinny he was drying his face off and so it was some different actor with a really skinny bony back and then he hops in his suit and then you see him take the towel down it's just a hairy matt damon matt damon lost

zero pounds for that role i'm convinced of it christian bale, for the machinist, he really did turn himself into a skeleton. That is incredible. We talked about this on an episode a bit ago. Someone outlined what he did. And it was like Machinist 125, Batman 210. Something like... Was it The Fighter? What was the movie called where he was this sort of washed up boxer?

Yeah, I think that was it. Okay. The discipline needed to do that is just insane. where he was this sort of washed-up boxer. Yeah, I think that was it. Okay, and he was really light. The discipline needed to do that is just insane. I still wonder how they do it. I read some interview. He said he ate an apple a day and ran for like five miles. It's like just burning a lot of calories, not taking any in.

The getting skinny thing, I feel like the formula for that is just well known. Maybe take an Adderall or something that'll step up your metabolism and kill your appetite as a bonus, but basically you're starving. Look, we learned how to get skinny through Auschwitz. There's lots of practice there.

How you get from the machinist to Batman in a year, like, if I devoted all my time and energy to exercising, I don't think I could do that kind of transformation. I could get better, but I couldn't do that. There's formulas. If you have to eat so much protein, and I'm sure it's all laid out by trainers,

and you have all day to work out, eat the exact right meals six times a day. That's your whole goal. So you don't think he's on roids? I don't think so, no. Probably not roids realistically, but there's a team of people devoted to him.

To his nutrition and his training and everything. Yeah, beeping him like, alright, eat your half cup of brown rice right now and this much chicken that we have pre-prepared for you. Well, I think Matt Damon was able to do nothing on his own. He was. The spacesuits covered a lot of flub. Yeah, the spacesuits covered everything.

So he was supposed to be like emaciated and thin, but you only see him from the back. Or like you said, he was drying off his face so you don't see his face. It wasn't even sophisticated CGI. It was just a different dude. Yeah, just found a skinny guy. Yeah you walk for you know 30 seconds yeah apparently he uh he he wanted to lose the weight for the movie he was going to drop 30 to 40 pounds uh film that skinny stuff first and then bulk back up and film the rest of the movie but they had six months to do it and uh ridley scott said fuck that and uh they didn't so they either used uh they're suggesting here that it was cgi oh okay well i stand corrected

then but yeah i thought for sure it was going to be uh just a different dude was there anything that you really hated about the movie or disliked i liked pretty much all of it i i don't think this is uh a spoiler at all but there's something i didn't like it's that the trailers gave away a lot of the plot oh i stopped i only watched one trailer i watched both trailers many times i was super excited i've been like martian anticipating in the way that some other people might have for like Star Wars or something. And we saw it like the first showing of the first morning we could find. And I was really into it. And watching it through, there were major plot points that happened like 80% way through the movie that were told in the trailers.

So if you don't want that. Yeah, I saw the trailer so I watched it I already have a lot of the movie yeah you can't watch here are the best parts of this movie yeah you should just watch the teaser trailer and then that should be it with it with a film I saw like in the previews at the theater last night they were playing a preview for the point break reboot point the original point break was pretty cheesy, but it was okay.

It was a good action movie. But this new one looks awful. And this two and a half minute preview literally told the whole story of the fucking movie. Like, the cornerstone of the movie is that, like, these guys are extreme athletes and they want to do these, like, eight amazing, like, extreme athlete challenges across the globe.

And to finance it, they're robbing banks. And they need to rob, like like extreme athlete challenges across the globe and to finance it they're robbing banks and they need to rob like eight banks are also across the globe and this fbi agents following along with surfers no they're doing there's like mountain biking on like in like the grand canyon or something like that or not mountain biking but like bma um uh what do you call it like motocross or whatever and they're like jumping up onto these rock formations and there's like I don't know, all kinds of extreme sports. Well, like halfway through the trailer they're like he's only got one more to go.

So you know right there, alright, well they're definitely going to get through the first seven, eights of this movie unscathed. So they're going to all these different spots of things they want to do and robbing banks along the way. Yeah, it'll be shit. Don't watch that. It's going'll be shit. Don't watch that. It's going to be shit.

100% pure adrenaline. I didn't recognize any of those actors really. It's going to be terrible. It's going to be shit. But the Martian was great. I'd give it a 7.5 out of 10, I would say. I thought that Damon did a great job.

You know who I would have liked to have seen in that role? I don't know if he would have done a better job, but it would have just been a different job. Chris Pratt. I feel like... It would have had to be too goofy. I love Chris Pratt. Damon was already pretty silly. I have

to think it through. I like Damon so much in it. Yeah. And Guardians of the Galaxy. Imagine Chris Pratt in there. I feel like it would have been a different movie. It would have been more silly. I just want to see him being like,

yes, we're going to science the shit out of this. Him blowing himself up and all that stuff. It would be a totally different movie. I like Matt Damon more. One minute wacky misadventure different movie. I like Matt Damon more. I give the movie a 9 out of 10 and I like Matt Damon over Chris Pratt in it. I like Matt Damon over Chris Pratt too, but I would

have been interested to see Chris Pratt because it's the kind of role that he could do. I haven't seen Jurassic World yet. I haven't seen Jurassic World yet though, so that was... I will give it a nine out of ten on my interest to see this movie now hey I've got another thing we were talking about spoiler trailers I want to want this is an example let me

do the pk a big screen that's a little fucked up I am so I wait you didn't cue up at zero so what we do we get if you're new to this, is we open it. We all queue up at zero. And if you give me just a second, I want to fix people's cameras. I'm the only one who's not messed up. I haven't even heard of this. Really? All right.

Jessica Jones from Marvel. Is that a superhero? Yeah. Yeah. So I sort of don't want you to know anything. I'm just doing... Shucks. I'm fixing the layout. It's going to fit right in with Daredevil.

And they're going to do a Punisher as well. They're doing several of these. I think this literally takes place in the same town as Daredevil. Because it says something about Hell's Kitchen, which is a Daredevil thing to me. I'm sure there's experts out there who know far more, but Daredevil was great. I'll fix the rest of this later, but are you guys ready to play? Excellent. Get ready. Before we start, this is a trailer for Jessica Jones. It gets me interested in it, and it ruins

nothing. Ready, set, play. Nothing. Ready, set, play. Bill's kitchen. You could've hit that. She just beat the hell out of everyone. No knife. That's it. And there's another one, too. It's just as short.

Definitely a teaser. Didn't ruin it. So who is that? Can we watch this one together, too? Like, what's the backstory of this character? I don't know anything about the Marvel characters. Who's Jessica Jones? Me neither.

Let's watch one more, and it'll answer hardly any questions. Oh, good. All right, are you ready? Somebody playing any questions. Oh, good. All right. Are you ready? Somebody playing? Nope. Oh, it's me. I auto-played on the other one. Ready, set, play.

2.59 p.m. In bed. She's working the Kyle. Looks like she had a fun the Kyle mm-hmm they're just introducing us to Jessica Jones who we don't know yeah she was third shift that's what that's about oh nice oh damn all right and that's it that's what you know special yeah and i thought like this is a really cool way to like finally these are things that aren't ruining the show for me.

Like, I'm learning about it. I'm intrigued. Yeah, I'm intrigued. I will definitely check it out and see what's all up. And as far as a trailer, like, in the Martian trailer, Matt Damon is like, all right, I'm going to have last. It's supposed to last this long, et cetera, et cetera. I'm going to science the shit out of this. And I was intrigued.

I wanted to go see it. It was cool. But I'm losing my train of thought. But this gets me intrigued without ruining, you know, what's to come. Main plot and everything. Yeah, they're just like, all right, this is a superhero. It's a hot chick. You want to see that?

Yeah. Do. She want to see that? Yeah. Dude. She seems to have loose morals. Loose morals. Yeah, a little bit, and I like that. You know, I don't want a Superman. You know, I want someone who drinks too much and sleeps in too long. The Punisher is one of my favorite superheroes

because there's a guy whose whole family is murdered right in front of him and he doesn't have any superpowers to speak of. He couldn't crush that clock radio if he wanted to, but he's got guns. Lots of guns. And he just shoots criminals. That's all he does. Is he like a Kung Fu type guy or is he just a...

I mean, I've never read any of the comics or anything. I just watched the movie and read a little bit about it on the internet. But I don't think he's like a gun-fu type guy as much as he is just takes guns and goes and kills people, I think. Like, he just shoots the bad guys. There's something to be said for that, man. Like, I don't know. Well, I've learned that i don't really like superman you know

well i will get excited for the movies and i think the superman batman thing is going to be pretty cool but superman being boring is a is a thing that i buy into superman's not brave he's a never in any danger superman you never worry that he's gonna win he's never really hurt he's just perfect yeah he would kill batman just by looking at him yes so the the problem with this there's gonna be so many comments about the battle batman always wins but the problem with that that was like an xbox ps4 troll yeah all of the superman movies you're right about what you said in the way it's been presented in all of the superman movies that there have really ever been like like he'll fight zod or whatever every now and then but even he is no match even though there's three of them

um but in the comics and in the cartoons he regularly he has like there's like four or five guys like alien like supermen that he has to fight every now and then. And they match up with him. He dies. I can't remember the name of the thing that killed him. But he's been killed before. How did they bring him back? He came back.

He just kind of came back. He pulled a Jesus and came back out of his coffin a few days later with long flowing hair. And then he fought the evil version of Superman that Lex Luthor had cooked up it was like a robo Superman so at first he beats that thing to death and then uh oh yeah that's how the movie ends yeah because he in the first fight that he dies and he killed the monster they killed each other I don't know I feel like they just don't focus on any of the cool villains it's always the same shit over and over. They always want to do the origin story,

which is so lame. The origin story should be like a 30 second montage at the beginning of the movie, and that's it. I don't want to see Peter Parker get his heart broken. When the reboot begins, I thought it was good. When the reboot begins. When they're rebooting the whole

series, some of the origin ones are okay. You know who did a great reboot? Star Trek. Star Trek did the best reboot I've ever seen. I thought Star Trek movies were getting a little lame with the Voyager. No.

Next Gen cast. The Next Generation. They were so interested in theater, and Picard's always doing like a show tunes thing and data's out there bellowing his songs and they're great they're so talented i am so they're just i'm looking for space pirates and these guys are like drama nerds and well i mean there are no space that that's the difference you know star trek's about like nerds in space always doing the right thing.

That's the whole story of Star Trek. Well, Captain Kirk does not. The rebooted Captain Kirk, he does not behave. He gets demoted. Kirk was always different. He'd go down to the planet and fist fight a fucking alien. He's the man. He's not hard doing that shit.

No, yeah, and I like that. And then when they rebooted so as you know there's canon right this happens that happens etc uh without ruining anything there is space or time travel involved in the star trek reboot so it makes sense they like they explained why they don't have to follow canon anymore like there's some time travel and you are free to write your own story and boom you could do anything start it all over and then jj abrams went to star wars and now it's not going to be the same we'll see we'll see what the third one's like i uh i'm more interested i know that um simon pegg is uh is a big part of the writing process this time around he's like super star trek nerd and he also plays scotty

of course uh and in the new star trek movies um so movies. So I'm holding out hope that the third Star Trek, Star Trek Beyond, I think it's called, will be good. But I'm more interested in Star Wars. Maybe they'll finally make a good Star Wars movie. No matter what they do, everybody's going to bitch and moan and be disappointed. I guarantee it's the number one movie of all time when it's all said and done.

Like, Star Wars is going to blow up. and done. Like Star Wars is going to blow. Yeah, totally. Star Wars is going to blow everything else away. It's going to make more money than Jurassic World just did. It's going to kill it. Setting the bar pretty high there. You think it'll be the number one top grossing all time? It'll be number one grossing all time, even if you adjust it, I bet.

Well, I don't know. I've heard that if you adjust it. Yeah, like The Sound of Music made like $10 billion. Yeah, there was one movie. I don't remember it, but but if you adjusted it it was like most of the fucking population when it was like two-thirds of the people wouldn't watch that fucking movie titanic was a really big one yeah but back then it was like what are you gonna do other than go to the movies like oh mary sue do you want to sit around and wait for you know typhoid to get us? Or do you want to go to the films while we can? Titanic, man.

It's polio night. You got to listen. Titanic. Wheelchairs get in free. How old were you guys in like 92? Were you born? 92. I was 99. Was Titanic 99?

Yeah, Titanic was 99. Okay. Yeah, it was. Were you guys relevant? Were you like six? I was 21. I was like, in 99, I was like 15 or something. Oh, okay.

So you don't have accurate memory. I was old enough to jerk off to the titties. So the thing about Titanic, if your listeners are younger maybe, that thing dominated every form of media for like six months it was the first film that i remember hearing about people going to watch that second time like yeah i've seen it you want to go again yeah yeah let's all go again dude i wasn't interested in titanic i saw it like three months after it came out there aren't many movies that play like six months later that song whatever like how does it you sang that so well i'm waiting for the copyright claim so um yeah that song six months

later was still like number one on the charts playing on the radio back when people listen to radio in their cars all the time it was just non-stop advertising for the movie i wonder if that's the adjusted all-time best-selling movie it's gotta be the top about to find that adjusted all the time the sound of music is I think. Gone with the Wind is one. I knew it. That's the one. It's not as outrageous as you made it seem, though. But during the time of Gone with the Wind,

apparently, the percentage of Americans who went to the movies was much, much higher. Star Wars is already number two. This movie's going to take that over. Sound of Music is three. It wasn't like, oh, it's this weekend in November, Star Wars is already number two. This movie is going to take that over. Sound of Music is three. There were a ton of movies being released back then. It wasn't like, oh, it's this weekend in November,

so 11 movies come out. It was just like, oh, well, the spring movie's here. Then like, oh, there's a couple more a month or two from now. This is missing Jurassic World, I think. The Wizard of Oz had to make a ton of money, right? It's got to be up there. It's got to be up there. Good call.

So Jurassic World's not on this. How much did Jurassic World make? I thought it just broke the record. Oh, there it is. It's 28th because it's adjusted. What am I saying? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Where's Titanic on the list? Five. Five. Yeah, 97. Anybody want to take some bets on this I guarantee that movie by the end of the year is number one takes this list over by the end of the year I'll take it yeah mmm oh when does it release like Christmas right yeah

we're locked in. Deal set. By the time it makes its run in China. Because I predict that this movie is going to be, I think Jurassic World may have broken the record for Chinese box office numbers for all time. I think this will as well. Within a year of release. Definitely. By the time it's out, I guarantee it's number one of all time.

This is going to be huge. It's going to be massive. They've been running the hype train for over a year now. They said that about episode one too, right? This is going to be this much. Episode one was shit and it still made a ton of money. But before it came out, people were like,

oh my god, episode one is coming. Episode one is the second highest Star Wars and it's 17th on the list. Because the hype was so real in that movie. Everyone saw it and then they're like, what the fuck? I was young enough when it came out that I still thought it was cool. I liked the speed racing

and all that. I did too. In my first viewing, I was like, this is for the video game. The damn speed race with the Howard Cosell impersonator. I hated it right away. Like the little gnat who flew around and just, oh. No, the announcer.

Oh, the announcer. There was a whole Howard Cosell caricature alien thing going on. And I hate that. It's so lame. At least Star Trek. I feel like Star Trek does a good job with their aliens but star wars aliens are always lame if you ask me like those tentacle faced people and the multiple eyes play in the play in the crazy and like that's such kiddy shit like i want hardcore

black dark humor main characters getting killed off 30 minutes and then again 45 minutes and i want some i'm with you so much. But people always tell me, well, that's not what Star Wars is. Star Wars is, you know, a children's thing. It is, you know, happy music being played by aliens in bar scenes and stuff like that. That's not fun. It's Star Wars.

And it's not a children's movie in that way. Oh, remember that part in Toy Story where the estranged father came home and in a drunken rage cut his son's hand off only to be consoled later by Woody and Buzz? Like, no, this is not meant to be a kids movie, but that is a very common write-off of the critiques.

You're right. But there was so much CGI and stuff in Episode 1 that went away from the way that they did things in the originals that they should have just taken the original technology and way they did things and took that to the next level than trying to replace it with CGI. You know,

I saw some, Oh, I know Kyle, you're trying to get in. I was going to say, I prefer practical effects to CGI most of the time. Now this in specifically in like horror movies, like if you go back and watch the thing,

but would by John Carpenter from like 1988, I think with, uh, Kurt Russell and all them, those tentacle monster alien things when they're like three dogs melding together into one like multi-dog headed tentacle monster

that's a real thing sitting in the floor that's a real practical effect with puppeteers operating it and you know gases coming out of it and like squirt guns and it's really there. Or like alien and aliens yeah the updated versions of those uh movies just don't have the same charm it doesn't look real because it's not physically there like you cgi is amazing you do incredible things but one thing it

can't do is up close and personal tentacle monsters and shit i like to see that stuff like exploding like lord of the rings obviously the original lord of the rings orcs and uruk-hai verse the hobbit like it looks so much worse you don't feel like they're there because their strides don't look natural yeah those were stuntmen and they were hitting each other and when they hit each other they recoiled back and there was a there was like mass to their weapon there was mass to their bodies everything had the right amount of inertia yeah every hit didn't cause like some weird floaty like through the air so i can't tell you what you like but i will say what i have noticed that cgi has gotten so good that oftentimes i had no idea it was a thing like mad max is the like poster

child when it's good for practical effects mad max is the poster child for practical effects and then you see what mad max looked like before cgi and so much of it was cgi you just didn't know you know and like wicked was saying that is that's when they've done it really right um freaking wolf of wall street i had no idea how much cgi was in that movie some of it seemingly pointless you know like really i didn't even know that tons you didn't know that oh my god so there's a it's kind of long to watch it's like 13 minutes but there's a thing that showed all the cgi in it so much of that movie was cgi and you had no idea anytime there's some sort of like beautiful mansion some sort of like beautiful scene where like everything is like super pimped out and incredible.

It's kind of there, but it's like 70% there. And then they'll paint over that 70% and they'll make it even more audacious and beautiful. But little things like the goldfish swallow thing, they made Leonardo DiCaprio look

younger throughout. There's so much CGI in that. And when they play tennis in the country club prison at the end, that prison was so different. It looked nothing like that. But the thing that it did look like was almost as good. The beach house party scenes, those houses had other houses near them.

The sky didn't look like that. There were telephone poles. All of it's gone. They did so much CGI. And in my opinion, it wasn't critical to the plot at all. But when you saw it, you're like, wow, I had no idea how much CGI was in Wolf of Wall Street. CGI is incredible now. I like a lot of it.

I will agree with Kyle, I think, in that sometimes when they do it to humans or humanoids. It's not quite there yet. Yeah. It's indistinguishable from real life. I don't know if it's bro science or what, but apparently humans are particularly adept at looking at other human faces. And it just makes our standards for that totally high. Yeah, we catch little things we don't even realize we're catching. I heard that the CGI Arnold Schwarzenegger in the new Terminator was excellent.

Everybody's saying that that's like, they're talking about the sweat and the pores and the facial stuff and the eyeball movement and all that. I haven't seen it yet, but to me it's like monsters. If there's a monster in the movie, then it needs to seem real for me to be afraid or to be concerned about it in that will smith movie um back to earth or whatever what he did with his kid and you know in that movie there were these monsters that could smell your fear and as retarded as that is it would have been okay if the monster actually looked real and you thought it was a real thing the ursa what a shit movie that was that was the shittiest movie of all time i want to see it it's you should it's dude i'll watch it

with you to laugh at it like you go to a movie night and like pick on a movie like mystery science theater style i would love to rip that one apart because i've watched it twice and i watched i've watched a video uh like picking it apart as well you know they have that series on youtube like everything that's wrong your movie sucks uh well the one i watch is i've watched your movie sucks but there's another one called um everything wrong with insert movie title in you know 10 minutes or less 20 minutes or less and the the amount of time always changes because there's more wrong with certain movies and this one it was like whatever the fuck that movie was called beyond earth or whatever movies and this one it was like whatever the fuck that movie was called beyond earth or whatever everything that's wrong with this movie in five six hours or less that's the way i look at it

because dude every step of the way it's just not only is it like is it not only is the cgi bad not only is the acting bad but the premise is unbelievable and the uh the at the beginning there's a lot of of exposition where they let you know what's been going on the last thousand years. It's terrible. It's awful. The whole idea behind the movie, every facet of the movie, the videography, the acting, the sound mixing, the whole premise. It's the shittiest movie I've ever seen. It's an M. Night Shyamalan movie. I was just about to say that. It's an night shamalon movie but earth was killing people they hide it

they don't tell you who made this movie like it it's like they were aware either m night shamalon made it and said i don't want to be associated with it or that didn't happen the movie came out and they didn't want to be associated with m night shamalon because what was the new m night shamalon tv show that show? That was good. I liked it. He's got a new... So if you look at the curve of M. Night Shyamalan movies, it starts out with the Sixth Sense

and the curve is the money it's making and the ratings of the movie. And then it dips down with Unbreakable and then down farther with Signs and there's Lady in the Water and there's The Happening and there's lady in the water and uh there's the happening and there's a couple where it goes really low and and lately and then and then at the very bottom there's uh the avatar uh avatar last airbender and since then it's been steadily coming back up and his last movie the visit uh uh the visit is his latest movie and

apparently he funded the thing himself, $5 million. He completely funded the movie for $5 million out of his own pocket. It's made over $100 million, and it's come back on that curve of movies until it's on the same level as Unbreakable, I think. I like that. I still don't trust this guy. I remember I think Time Magazine had his picture on the cover, and it said, The next Steven Spielberg?

Dot, dot, dot. That was before The Village and that huge slew of garbage. What was happening? So, excited by... The Earth was coming back. Marky Mark can't have. Excited by Sixth Sense,

Unbreakable, and Signs. A lot of people say Signs wasn't as good, but for me personally, I love Signs. And then I went to see The Happening and it was a whole movie waiting for the movie to start. And

The Village, that got bad reviews, but I didn't think it was horrible. The Village was depressingly bad. It was that mentally handicapped guy who was flirting with the one chick. Everything he did was ridiculous. They are somehow living in this little

quadrant of forest and the evil people keep them inside by dressing like bears basically and running around the woods like maniacs. You watched the whole movie right? Yeah I watched the whole thing. Oh my god, it's modern days. So here's the reason that failed.

That failed because if you remember the marketing, I saw this shit in theaters. The marketing campaign was this. It was a monster movie. It was like, don't go out. It looked like it was 18th century, 1700s. It looked like these were like pilgrims, pioneers, something like that on the East Coast, you know, in a new land. And it looked like there were monsters in that new land.

And I was like, oh, this is going to be so fucking cool. These are like, you know, they're like pilgrims or whatever. And they're going to be hyper religious. And then maybe they'll make this a thing. I didn't know what they were going to do. But I like the idea of like some sort of werewolf monster and and shamalon and it was a shit when i found out what was actually going on it was like this isn't the movie i signed up for it reminded me of the gray with liam neeson when i wanted a wolf fighting movie and i got a cancer movie and a

survival like dealing with it was a movie about dealing with accepting loss or something like that, I would say. Even the gray. I liked the gray, too. I'm not that much of a critic, I guess. I didn't realize the village ending was even a twist. I'm going to get wicked to review all my videos. Did you realize what the twist was? I liked it.

It was modern days. Stop ruining it. No, those elders laid it on so thick that whole beginning of the movie of like you can't go out there you can't go like it wasn't just like like a subtle like there's monsters in the woods it was like it was so slathered on that my thought process seeing it was like why are these maniacs making everybody else dress up like they're in the past instead of going out into the world. Like, I'd at no point thought that it was actually in the past.

I can think of at least 10 or 20 Twilight Zone episodes that have better twist endings than that movie. Just make any one of those. Just pick a random episode of Twilight Zone and make that. That movie was shit. The rest of his movies were shit. Unbreakable is amazing.

Signs is really good, and I've seen it maybe 4 or 5 times did you watch Wayward Pines? haven't heard of it it was good I did I thought it was good you're a very positive movie goer I want to go to the theater with you

that's a TV series I feel like I'm pretty harsh on movies what did you think of the second season of heroes wicked? What this new reboot no the second season it went out mm-hmm. I could barely remember it I remember I bet you liked it a little ridiculous. I know I know I watched Pantene Watchmaker was starting stealing everyone's ability.

That show, the first season was great. I like shows that build up this big mythology and the show feels older than it really is. It's really deep. The universe is developed.

Yeah, exactly. I like that. I like a rich knowing that the universe is developed yeah yeah yeah exactly i like that um i like a rich universe within the movie or the movie or television show whatever it may be and the first season i felt like they were really establishing that siler was this ultimate villain who like you know he was taking the powers and accumulating them so you really did need this team of heroes to take on this one superhero it made sense it was like yeah he has all of our powers we have to team up to go after this guy the problem was hero could start could like manipulate time and space okay so super op that that was a problem off the beginning and then like so then they started making rules for hero that didn't exist at first

like he was trying to bring Cherry back to life or something, the waitress. And he tried and tried and tried like hundreds of times and he couldn't bring people. So now it's like, all right, we built a rule where he can't bring people back to life because he was so OP that nothing mattered so long as Hero existed.

And to nerf him. They had to nerf him. And then they started nerfing him further where like basically he had no powers because you'd get a bloody nose anytime he used his power and they were he was constantly losing his power you know and it was like they would just it felt to me like every four episodes they just started a cycle over again and it was several cycles but the the main cycle i'm talking about is the evil versus good character cycle peter would be evil this episode he'd be good three episodes later and by the end

of the season he'd be evil again or peter's brother who not um i thought he got evil at least once but but peter's brother the senator or whatever right right that guy constantly back and forth and it was like that with a lot of the characters. Certainly Hayden Pantieri's father, the glasses-wearing agent who knew about all this. Constantly going back and forth from good and evil. And it was the writer's strike that did

that. That's what ruined that show for me and for everyone in my opinion. That's what ruined Lost. I don't know which season of The Office falls within that time Lost. I don't know which season of The Office falls within that time period. I don't know either. That ruined a lot of entertainment.

Lost for me it's like it really caught my attention. It was so oh what's happening next week? It drove me insane and I really felt let down in the end. It's like, oh, that was a long journey for what it led to, I guess.

And there were so many questions that it didn't answer. Lost was like an hour-long trailer for more Lost every week. And then the trailer that you're waiting, like, oh, I can't wait to see what happens with this. They just drop that and get in a new direction. What's in the hatch? Oh, my God. What's the clock do?

Right. And then all of a sudden, like, I still don't know what the numbers are for. They're pretty much nothing. Right. They remember Walt had all these powers. Like, you know, when he wanted the guitar to appear, the island gave him a guitar. When Walt, like, thought of a dead bird or something, he scared his parents off with the polar bear. All that shit was never properly explained.

Someone's going to say the polar bear was. It was a Dharma experiment or something. It didn't tie in because Walt saw a polar bear in a comic book, and then all of a sudden there's a polar bear in real world. And they pretty much told you Walt made that happen. And everything could be – There was a flashback where Walt totally has this interaction where he makes a bird die or something like that.

Yeah. The island could totally be explained by Walt willing the plane down. That's one thing. And then the island could totally be explained by Hurley being in a mental health ward or something like that and being in love with someone

else. Or that they're all dead. And then they're all dead and then the time traveling. And none of it, like, there were so many unanswered questions even after all the questions were answered. It was like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Don't pretend

that you wrapped this thing up and put a bow on it fuck you like where's walt in this directed that thing you know i didn't know that the uh the pilot was the most expensive television pilot of all time it cost almost 14 million dollars um they had to move those so the planes you see in in the pilot uh you know they're crashed on the beach and the planes there they actually went beach and the planes there, they actually went and they brought those planes there. That's Hawaii.

They had to – I think it cost – it was hundreds of thousands of dollars to get that done. So, yeah, most expensive television pilot of all time. Most expensive isn't always as cool as you think. It's like, oh, it's the most expensive ever. They filmed it in Hawaii. Oh, that's a lot of it. That pilot, though, was pretty crazy. The plane crash and the planes going. It was though was pretty crazy. The plane crash and the flames.

But it was a plane crash. Remember the guy gets sucked into the engine then the engine explodes? Yeah, there was like one special effects scene towards the very start of the pilot and the rest of it was just people running around in the woods. The jungle. I don't think you're remembering it well then.

There was a lot of special effects on that beach. There was a lot of mysteries and the smoke monster. Is that true with watching it all? No. No. No. I would not go down that road. Don't. At the time I was so into it. I wanted to know more.

I remember when whatever season it was when it begins by showing off a character who lives in a bunker underground on the island and he's going about his daily routine of like eating his powdered food or whatever and running on his treadmill and listening to his opera music and like brushing his teeth and then it did like an alarm goes off it's like and like grabs like a machine gun is like up the ladder back into the jungle and you realize he's on the island with our survivors i don't remember what happened the rest of that that season but i guarantee it didn't fucking

matter i think he was flipping a switch he was flipping a switch and he thought if he didn't flip that switch that like the world was going to end the island was going to turn inside out or like he was going to suck him his own asshole or something like i guarantee the end or something that they didn't flip the switch nothing nothing happened. Dude, the signs. Remember they gave you a little flash of spray paint. Graffiti is what I'm looking for on the wall. And you're like, oh my god, everyone's dissecting the graffiti. I'm online back when the internet was new.

Learning more about Lost and people dissecting and sharing thoughts on the graffiti on the wall. None of it mattered. None of it mattered. This show dropped clues everywhere and never followed up on them. Pointless. Everything's so fucking pointless. There was a time when I could tell you the numbers. It was a mystery just to be a mystery that was never answered.

Yeah. And all of them tied in. It was like they had an idea that they were going to run with and then headed a new direction and then a new direction and then a new direction. And it was, oh. It kept you on your toes. I think that you had the original writers, and I think that maybe they had this plan.

They're like, okay, so this is what. Hey, guys, gather around. Guess what? The island doesn't even exist. It's all a computer simulation. Their minds are in there. They recovered their bodies from the plane crash. They've got their brains inside this simulation,

and they just keep reliving the events that put them in the coma over and over. That's what's really going on. Now let's write a show around that. It's going to be crazy. To be honest, no one did that. Or if they did do that, when the writers called, they lost it. The island gives them superpowers. Walt has superpowers. Locke has

superpowers. This guy kicks his dick. Just the fact that he can walk on the island when he was handicapped. Broken spine. The island had a will. The island had a will. It rewarded you if you did good stuff. It punished you if you did bad stuff. The island was

like a character early on. Then it wasn't it was just a set and they got new writers several times throughout the show and like house and if they either had a plan like he said or they were capable of following a plan but what lost actually was is like the games we played last week where it was like all right tell us this i do this kyle throws out fucking foreskin and i'm like how do i work that in and it's new direction new direction and and it was shit lost sucks shit lost sucks so hard supernatural coming on netflix this week it was only shit because because of where it ended. The journey along the way, you have

to admit that you were into it. Yes. You were! I will say this. I was into it and excited about it for three seasons maybe. Possibly four. There were six titles. By the time I was watching season six, it was a job. I was only

watching because I wanted to know how it ended. And I was disappointed. And it didn't even do that right. There's no driving one of the worst endings in a series that was like mainstream in history, right? Everybody hated it. Yeah. I would say Lost was way worse than Dexter. Yeah, I agree. I didn't mind

the end of Dexter. Me too. Did he go to Portland? Is that where he went? It could be. He was a lumberjack. So in season like four or five, or maybe it's early. There's only five seasons, I think. So I think in season three,

he's having this conversation in his imagination. I think it might be his brother that says it to him. They're talking about what he should do. He's like, you could always move to Portland and become a lumberjack, and that's what all serial killers do. And he ended up doing it. I didn't realize that there was a

reference to that. Yeah, I didn't know that. I'm on my second time through. But I'm getting a little bored with it right now. So the ending was just to fulfill a bad joke from like three years earlier? I thought the Dexter ending was okay. It was widely hated on the internet.

But my opinion was it was okay. If the internet but my opinion was okay if you look at the imbd imbd scores of that series uh by by episode they're all up there at like 7.8 or something like that some of them get up in the eights and then this one's like a three or something that's way down there it's it's the worst rated episode um of that show aren't finales usually rated lower though like there are a few finales usually rated lower, though? There are a few finales that people are like, wow, look at how they wrapped it up. Can you believe they got all the loose ends in a neat little row?

I've had more bad experiences than good experiences. The Star Tracks always have these really shitty endings, it seems like. Breaking Bad was a great ending. Breaking Bad was great. Another one, Parks and Rec, had a really great ending. I haven't seen it. I haven't watched that show. It's a great ending. Breaking Bad was great. Another one, Parks and Rec had a really great ending. I haven't seen it. I haven't watched that show.

It's a great show. I haven't seen the last two seasons. I won't ruin anything, but when Parks and Rec ends, they kind of tell you what becomes of all the players, all the characters. And it's really nice. Like, oh, they sort of wrap everything up. You get to see who's who.

And it was cool. You wondered. They answered the questions i wanted answered yeah that's neat yeah that was good how many seasons are there of that show parks and rec seven aren't there seven or eight yeah that's a lot it's a really good show new topic sure yeah i want to do Kyle's topic. 800-pound man kicked out of a hospital for ordering pizza to his room. Oh, this is great. Is this a video? Should we watch it together? I'm cultivating mass. Are you guys?

I'm going to play it. Yeah. Is it not queuing? alright so I'm queued up at zero do you guys want to watch it together? 59 seconds also queued at zero ready set

play oh it didn't play right away no it's waiting for me to there's a guy in a red shirt playing in the back of probably a titanium reinforced van. This guy is gigantic. Hold on, we're playing.

It's a disease. It's a disease. His face is so heavy, he can't even smile. He's trying to go, but the muscles required to lift his whole face, he doesn't have it. I can't hear.

He lives in the back of his dad's SUV. How? He's gonna go right back to his eating habits. How he's immobile He's supposed to lose weight to get down to 550 to get a gastric bypass I need to call that Paul Watson guy from Whale Wars. He'd care about this guy. If my dog was fat, I wouldn't be like, oh, he's eating too much. I'm feeding him too much. He's fat because we feed him everything we want.

We use him as a garbage disposal. That's why your dog gets fat. That guy is not going to the kitchen and overeating yeah when you get to that extent it's a lot of enabling that's keeping him that fat like you can't stay fat on your own even if he could well he's ordering he's ordering pizzas right but i mean the people that kicked them out or whatever like they should know you know we need to restrict his access to these things if this is going to work, because obviously he has a problem with self-control of being able to, you know, do this on his own.

Yeah. It probably shouldn't have kicked him out, but it is kind of, you know, it's like someone at a meth rehab finding a way to sneak that in in like a birthday cake or something. So it's kind of disrespectful to the people helping you because you're directly going in but obviously if you're there because you have a problem yeah i mean you're going to try to fulfill your needs of what you're there to i feel like

get them blacklisted from all the pizza places i couldn't his dad say like obviously you don't have a job but if you get this number have this flagged to be no do not deliver to this fatty because it's out of control and you're actively killing him like no don't i like that i i i feel like they shouldn't have kicked him out it seems like a little harsh i i can i agree with everything you said but it's flat out disrespectful these people are trying to help him it's expensive i'm sure i don't know if he's paying for it but i'm guessing he's not because they kicked him out and they're just like dude you can't order pizza that's eating disorder is a weird thing like i've come to have a better understanding of it i i'm sure to him it's an addiction as as compulsive as you know crack is

to a crack addict or heroin user. It's not like, why did you order that pizza? You were being disrespectful. He made some conscious decision to be a bad person. I'm sure he felt bad. He's like,

I can't help myself. I want this pizza. That's true. He's not dabbling in his food addiction. That feel bad. He's hardcore. That feel bad thing, though, I feel like that might be unique to food addictions.

People will argue about the word addiction, but I suspect people who are doing heroin are like, oh, I have to do this. It makes me get well. I feel good again. I feel happy, et cetera. But I don't think they kick themselves in the ass quite as much as food addiction suffers

when someone eats way too much once you get to a point where your life's in total shambles and you're living in the streets and like I know that the reason that I'm here is from this drug that has taken over my life, I want to quit but just one more

there's people in those positions with food addiction they empathize more with food addiction but just one more, you know. There's people in those positions. I just don't think... With food addiction. They empathize more with food addiction because you don't need... Not everybody has done meth and not everybody's going to do meth, but we all understand you need food.

If you needed a little bit of meth every day to get by, we'd look at meth heads like, oh, those poor bastards, they just couldn't control their meth intake and we all needed to survive. But I think that's the only difference in why people empathize more but it is an addiction just the same i feel for the food i can relate to it from nicotine addiction the thing about like a smoker for example there's a heavy addiction to it but i don't think smokers

hate themselves if anything they like themselves they like their fellow smokers they like their smoking breaks they like the conversations that they've had outside buildings in their little dog park area thing that they make them stand in. I smoked for like 18 years and I got to the point where I hated it. I hated the smell. I hated the stain in my teeth. I hated everything about it except for the fact that it calmed my nicodemum that I was craving, the nicotine. And so I replaced it with vaping, and I don't have the negative aspects of the smells. It smells good. It smells fruity. Is there nicotine in your vape?

Yes, a lot. 18 milligrams. It's not a thing that means anything to me, but I know a lot means a lot. But yeah, I just, maybe I'm wrong about this, but I don't imagine that people doing cocaine and heroin and crack or whatever are kicking themselves in the ass while doing it quite like eaters are. are kicking themselves in the ass while doing it quite like eaters are. Eaters are having ice cream or pizza or whatever,

mad at themselves during the consumption. And I feel like that's unique to eating. Whereas heroin guys are enjoying the consumption. They're like, ah, I'm back. Yeah, it's afterwards of the regret of, ah, I did it again. Yeah. But yeah yeah this guy it's kind of funny he ordered pizza while he was there

but how did he think it was going to get through did he think the Domino's guy would just waltz in and be like oh I need to take this to your eating disorder clinic oh that's fantastic did someone who's anorexic order it and they're like oh oh, no, the other side.

West wing. Yeah, yeah. That guy, you know, sad, but also, what do you expect? He can't get up. So I feel like the enablers are getting off scot-free in this thing, right? If you eat yourself to the point where you can't walk anymore, someone has a feeding

disorder yeah yeah they like knowing that someone is dependent on them for everything like they like having a dependent i think they need to feel important and by keeping them that fat they have someone who cares for them and someone who they know has no other outlet to fulfill that addiction other than them because i can call someone else if they told me to take a pizza to that guy and i was like okay i'll take it and then i see that guy that he's going to be getting the pizza i'm like fuck fuck no i'm not giving this guy the pizza like this that's ridiculous you have clearly had your fill you don't need any more pizza your connection i think is going bad because we're losing you and breaking up, but it'll probably resolve itself.

What was I going to say? The eating, the... Shit, I lost it. My bad. I'm old. Do you want to do an ad read? Yeah, I can do that. I can tell the listeners all about audible.com. Do so. This episode of Painkiller Already is tell the listeners all about audible.com. Do so.

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I think we're going to recommend The Martian this time around by Andy Weir. I think that would be a good one to check out. I'm going to actually download that. Now that I've seen the movie, I want to absorb the book too. The Whisper Sink is the cool thing. People have heard me say this before, but if you want to absorb the book too. The Whisper Sink is the cool thing. People have heard me say this before, but if you want to combat piracy, you have to offer something better.

And I totally wish I had this for my Game of Thrones books when I read them. Did you guys finish those, the Audible books on them? I did. Taylor had done it a long time ago. I got a book and a half to go, but I feel like I've gotten so many spoilers

and I've seen the end of the fifth season on TV I don't think there's too many holes for me I'm sure there's some like character development I need to catch up on but I know the broad strokes at this point and it's I've had a hard time picking it back up and I can't find the phone that it's all saved on I need to get back to that

but yeah I wish I had had that when I was doing it. I totally would have read and then listened to the car and read and had it all sync up. That would have been awesome, but I didn't have that. I would like that a lot. That's what kept me away from reading it on a device like that is because I definitely like the audiobook thing. I want that to be part of it, but occasionally, like if I'm sitting in bed with my girlfriend or something, it'd be nice to have the Kindle and just

go to that and read and not disturb her. I couldn't even audio it. I would want to listen to it on my computer sometimes and my phone other times. Even that wasn't in sync and that sucked. Oh, on the weight loss topic, before, I'm down 13 pounds. We were talking about it before the show.

Congratulations. I've been doing a lot of construction work, which is what I call exercise. And so it's been three months. I don't know how many pounds of muscle I've gained, but maybe two, three. And over the course of three months. What's your final goal?

Like 180? Dude, I don't even know. 180 anything would be awesome. I'm at 198 right now, down from 211 and um yeah that's 13 so uh uh yeah i think in the 180s i would look really good but uh i feel better now uh shorts that were where i would so i had some shorts that fit right and some shorts where I would like test the tensile strength of the button. And now the ones that fit right, I need a belt. And the ones I would test the tensile strength, I fit right now. So it's all like shifted a bit.

Shirts where I had like man boobs before now look way better. And 13 pounds is not nothing so um and yeah i get a shit feeling when you're like you think that you're maintaining a weight for a while and then like you get a different pair of jeans out that you remember as being like oh these are kind of my thinner jeans like they fit fine but they're like straight leg jeans and then you start putting them on and it's like i don't remember this being quite so much friction i put these on and then you sit down and you look and it's just like a meat packing plant of thigh into the jeans like god damn it it snuck up on me yeah switch it around and if you're so makes you feel like such a piece of shit if you're like 19 then you've never had a long period of stable body, right?

So I'm 42. From whatever, 22 to 42, all those years, you put on one pound a year, which is nothing, right? A twelfth of a pound a month, that's noise. But you do that for 20 years and suddenly you're 20 pounds heavier. Or just say, let's say you put on a pound in a month. Does that seem like a lot? A half a pound in a month?

So over the holidays? Come on. You can gain five pounds. Easy. A half a pound a month. I gained a pound yesterday. I had an all-you-can-eat fried chicken there, and I took advantage of it.

A half a pound a month sounds like nothing, but you do six pounds a year and then let 10 years go by, and all of a sudden you've gained 60 pounds. And you might think to yourself, like, oh, I would never gain 60 pounds. How did you let that happen to you? But half a pound a month, like... It's nothing, but it adds up. Yeah, yeah. And the good news is you can go the other way pretty quickly.

Like, you know, you can lose 10, you can lose three pounds a month. And three pounds a month, you run that for a year. All of a sudden, you're 36 pounds down, and you've made a real difference in who you are. My problem is I can't eat healthy all the time. It's just not going to happen. I love pizza. I love burgers. I love unhealthy food.

A lot of my weight gain was in the four months they did this house. I bought a new house, and we had it remodeled. And I had to sit here and came out and sat on the damn contractors every day. And I would go to Wendy's for lunch and stuff because I didn't feel like I did have options. I could have prepped a lunch and brought a bag and done healthier things, but I didn't. Instead, I went and had Wendy's and Kentucky Fried Chicken and stuff. What did you get from Wendy's? Number two.

Number six? Two things. Number one or number six? I don't know the numbers. Yeah, number one is just a double burger. Number one is a cheeseburger, and number six is their spicy chicken. The number two is the half-pound cheeseburger. The number three is the three-quarter pound cheeseburger.

And if you're smart, you'll ask for extra bacon and extra cheese on the number three, and then you got yourself a burger. Well, I would have gained even more. I'll have every once in a while, but can't have those very frequently. So I weighed 184 going into the survival trip. I came out at 170. No, I weighed 183 going in, came out 174.

I have gained those nine pounds back now, plus one more. So I'm about to go on a... I've already started on my diet. I haven't eaten in about 32 hours right now, something like that. I'll eat tomorrow. That's not a diet. Yeah, that's not a diet. That's starvation.

Yeah. It's the Auschwitz plan. It's like fasting. I'll start the diet off by going like 36 hours without eating. And then from then on, I'll switch to like three meals a day, like 400 calories a day. And I'll do that for three weeks. And I'll be right back down to my other weight. And then I'll probably start working out a little bit.

And I'll be right back to where I was. I've been losing weight real slow. 13 pounds over like three or four months. One of those. Like June or July I started. It's not that impressive. But it's slow and it's constant and it's the right way. And I've just been making like subtle adjustments.

Like I, of course, I eat out less. Midnight snacking has been kind of cut off. Most of the time. Maybe every two weeks or something I'll do it. I like binge eating. I really enjoy binge eating. Me too. Everybody does.

So like, and I want to be able to do it a lot. One binge meal a month is not enough. I want three or four a week. The only way to do it is to go crash diet, lose the weight, and then gorge again and gain it back and just bounce back and forth 10 pounds constantly. For those of you debating this

approach, that is not the only way. It is not binge like a maniac on Taco Bell and then don't eat. Can you hang up and come back? I'd like to try that. You're a little fuzzy. Very grainy. I've been going to Five Guys and I've updated my meal plan. I love it.

So I used to get the bacon cheeseburger which is two patties of meat and cheese. And then I'd get the large Cajun fries, which comes to like 2,400 calories once you've got your soda in there. Recently, I said, no, no, no. Don't give me the double bacon cheeseburger.

Give me just a single bacon cheeseburger with the large Cajun fries. We admire your discipline. And a hot dog. A hot dog. I don't know if anyone here has had the hot dog. I've never had the hot dog. Of course not. It's Five Guys Burgers and Fries. Why would you waste that trip to that wonderful burger mecca with a hot dog?

But trust me, you want to try this hot dog. First of all, it's like they cut the bread. I get bacon and cheese and relish and mustard and hot sauce. I hate mustard. Mayonnaise. Adults don't put ketchup on hot dogs. Love ketchup. Stop this. I'll put whatever the fuck I want on my hot dog.

I don't even like ketchup on them, but I don't like the elitist hot dog. I'll put ketchup just to rebel. It's a thing. Google it real quick. Should adults put ketchup on hot dogs? I know. If you're a douche from? And you'll find a myriad of people. No, I know. If you're a douche from Chicago, if you're a Chicago douche,

oh, only our street dogs are real. You can't have ketchup on it. You can put whatever you want on there. Like, just go nuts. You're going to slather a bunch of ranch on there. Go wild. I'm not going to look at you weird. That's up. Well, anyway, if anyone out there is wondering, the hot dogs are excellent. You should definitely try them.

However, that meal that I've been putting together lately is over 2,700 calories. It's very nice. It's so goddamn good, though. It's so good. It's so satisfying at the end. You're so full and greasy. For a long time, I've maintained that Kyle won't be able to keep this up forever.

Kyle's still in his 20s, but that doesn't last forever. Fast forward 10 years and we'll see. But I don't know. I was 25 when I started my upward, outward expansion. Kyle has not done that, and he's 29. That's good. Some people don't. Like I have an aunt that lived way in, well, she's still.

The trick is vanity. She's thin, and she eats whatever she wants. Some people just have the right metabolism to be able to burn whatever. I don't believe in metabolism anymore. I read that metabolism is like 5% difference from one

end of the spectrum to the other. We've covered the small additions, how that works. Sure, sure. Metabolism slows down, so you're saying that's only a 5% difference, no matter what. It doesn't slow down as much as people think. Yeah, exactly. It does slow down, but it's not some like, oh, I just hit 40. It was that drastic 50% cutoff.

Now, magically, my body defies physics and doesn't need as much. It does slow down, but it's not that huge drastic drop off. The thing is, now I've heard that, and I think we've talked about this in previous shows, like, hey, it's not what you think it is. On the other hand, every culture, old people are fat. Across all of time,

old people are fat. Like, old Romans are fat. They're not trying to be hot anymore. Old Japanese people are fat. I don't know about that. I was watching this thing about Okinawa. I'm sure there are. I was looking at those people and those rice. They're like 80 out there doing karate and shit.

Sumo. Good counter argument. Those guys are like 220 on average, I think. There's definitely bigger, like 300, 400. Yeah. Oh, sumo wrestlers? Yeah, they're quite big. Yeah.

All right. Let's see what the average weight of a sumo wrestler is. I bet it's closer to 200. Well, we're not talking about averages. We're talking about, you're saying, no, fat people exist. I wonder if they get heavier as they get older. It's just out of control. Yeah, I heard the thing,

but my counter was, it seems like every culture, the old people are fatter every time period. I bet if you go to Rome and Egypt that the old people are fatter. Every time period. I bet if you go to Rome and Egypt that the old people are pretty fat. I'm sure on average 100 years ago, people were much thinner than they are now because now we're eating

high fructose corn syrup with saturated fats that are harvested. I think that old people get fat because they are less physically active and they're less sexually active and they just don't care anymore. They don't care anymore. They're set in their ways.

They've already like reproduced. They've got a long, long-term relationship most likely. And it just doesn't matter as much anymore. And as they get older and more rickety, they're not able to get out there and run that mile a day that they they used to be able to and they start eating like shit i feel like care is not the thing right like i bet if you talk to an average woman who's like 48 she's not like i don't even care that i got fat i bet it has a huge impact on her sense of self-worth and and it was just easy for her to be thin when she was 22. And a lot of it comes with my career of an office job for eight hours a day and then come home to my hobby of sitting in front of a monitor playing video games.

I'm sure that has led a lot to the sedentary lifestyle, plus liking to eat burgers and pizza on top of that. Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah the trick is vanity you have to be a vain person you have to care about your physical appearance and you have to like getting laid and uh i feel like that's what drives me i mean i'm on the you know like like i i don't want to look pudgy you know if i upload a video i don't i don't want you know a million people or whatever looking at me like, ah, you're getting fat there, huh? You're getting fat. Because all you got to do is show a little double chin one time and you're a fat ass all of a sudden.

The public's harsh. And also, I want my clothes to fit. I want my girlfriend to find me attractive. I want to look in the mirror and be happy with what I see. So every time I start getting to the borders of that where i feel like i'm getting away from that it's time to go to whatever means are necessary to lose 10 to 12 pounds and then i'll i mean 10 pounds is like 50 000 calories of fun you get to have once you burn that off and it only takes me about how long have you fasted the longest uh on that survival trip, I guess there were periods where, no, I guess not.

I don't know. Like without any food whatsoever. Maybe like 40 hours, almost two days, something like that. Well, I've done like the master cleanse where they have this drink. It's like a lemonade, C cajun spices and stuff yeah cayenne pepper i did that for 14 days that was oh shit yeah 14 days of just lemon water yeah i was definitely sick of that shit but how much did you lose in two weeks oh i don't remember it was probably 30 pounds or something that's pretty neat trick neat trick, though. There's a lot of research that came out on that, and it's really bad for you.

Like, it can cause liver failure. Dad, you're not... All right, step up your vanity game. You're not vain enough. Yeah, you're right. I should just be more vain. No, you don't need to be drinking shakes and that shit. Just self-shame yourself.

I'm sure Kyle does self-shaming all the time. I self-shame myself today. Like if I think, if I notice a few pounds adding on, and I'm getting in the shower and I look in the mirror and I'm like, look at that fat. Oh my god, it's me. Like, what's... I can see, like, four pounds worth. Yeah. Me right now. Your body starts burning fat. And sometimes it'll be water weight. You'll just be bloated. where pounds were. Yeah. Me right now. Your body starts burning fat.

And sometimes it'll be water weight. You'll just be bloated. Like, I'll be thinking, I'll be like, ah, I'm looking really pudgy today. And I'll go and I'll run. I'll run for maybe an hour. I don't know.

For me, that's not that far because I use like an elliptical machine with weird inclines and stuff. But maybe I'll do three miles or something like that on some awful course or something like that. And by the end of it, I feel like I've sweated out like a miles or something like that on some awful course or something like that and by the end of it I feel like I've sweated out like a gallon or something like that I'll lose a quarter pound or half a pound easy

I I didn't eat or drank the day before like it's like yesterday I ate way too much an inappropriate amount of fried chicken asking them to go back and get me more plates but it's all you can eat and i'm not gonna lose money and so like i woke up this morning and it was just like oh look at you piece of shit like i was so bloated like i looked like a distended belly from like those african kids did you immediately have to take like did you wake up and immediately have like an emergency shit to take oh yeah yeah it wasn't even wake up it it was like, it was, I had been awake at 7, like, 30 in the morning, and it was like, I gotta go right now. Yeah, yeah. See, when I'm eating like shit, that's every morning for me, every day. I wake up and I'm like, oh, I've got a shit. You gotta go right in there. Because the night before, I'll start at like 8pm or something like that, and I'll have like five

meals by the time I go to sleep. There'll be like a bowl of cereal. There'll be some Hot Pockets. Maybe some pizza rolls. There'll be some spicy rice that I'll make myself. And then there might be a fast food meal mixed in there with some potato chips. By the time the morning comes around,

if anybody's in that shower before me, they better get the morning comes around it's if anybody's in that shower before me they never get the fuck out it's about you're rough in there i i we were talking about self-shaming and like i hopped on the scale today hit 198 which was you know it's it's not a new low but it's the lowest number i've seen so that's good right and uh i was like all right good but i wasn't happy i went to the bathroom afterwards, and you know the posture like elbows on knees? I'm like holding my belly fat. Like, no, you're not

done, you fat fucking piece of shit. You lose 13 more, you jackass. Yeah. It could get to a negative. That could be a negative Like people that are Bulimic or anorexic Are the extreme scale of the self shaming

Poor image of themselves That just gets out of hand Yeah be realistic Don't be ridiculous out there I don't know how that happens When they look at themselves and they're a skeleton And they think that's hot Or they think they're fat it's hot yeah I'm

going for like tone and trim like I'm not going for a skeletor the skeleton like you see the extreme examples and it's really bad but sometimes they'll be like look at this woman she's underweight and it's like not bad keep it up a little underweight that works for you you look hungry I like it you look like you haven't eaten as long as Kyle has Kyle you were talking about your shits

I know you do the bounce back between healthy and then just carnage for a while. Every time you switch back to the healthy part of your diet, isn't it always just like a why did I quit this as far as your shits go? When you're taking a shit and you're eating healthy, it's like, oh, it's 9.30 in the morning. I guess I'm going to go have my morning shit, and then I'll go on with my day. There will be no fear there.

It's not much clean up. Yeah, when you eat shit, fear there. The high fat content shits are messy. Every time you leave the house on a shit diet, it's a roulette of whether or not there's going to be an emergency. Immediately.

That's happened to me driving around. I'll leave somewhere on a 20 minute drive. Five minutes in, I don't even think about having to take a shit Six and a half minutes in I'm sweating and looking for an exit like I got to get out of here now I'm gonna shit my car awful I have a So so I have a five second video clip to play about healthy poops like This is pretty funny.

Oh, five seconds. I'll just watch it, I guess. My homeschools are perfect. They are gigantic. They have no more odor than the hot biscuit. Oh, wow, he cuts it off. He said they have no more odor than a dinner roll or something like that. That's a weird movie.

Then a hot biscuit, if I can make it out. I haven't seen that movie in a long time. That's not a good movie. Shit don't stink. So anyone been watching videos on YouTube lately? What are you into now? I really like, like I was saying earlier, I watch Fail Army. That's my favorite thing to watch is Fail Army.

I literally watch everything they upload. Those people, is Fail Army different than Fail Blog? Is it better or worse somehow? It's better. You know, it's a compilation of fails. And every week they have the fails of the week. Every month they have the fails of the month. And also every week they have like, I don't know, it'll be like female fails.

Or it'll be like bad driver fails. Or acrobatic fails. You know, a specific genre of fail that they've compiled together over a period of time. And the videos are generally five to eight minutes long, something like that. I just watched them and laughing. That shit lost me a long time ago. People falling, people crashing, yawn.

My YouTube watching is usually not... I don't normally watch everything that anyone uploads. It's more of a utility. I want to know something. I search for it. I find a video.

I watch it kind of thing. But there are people, if I search for something and I see certain people in there, it's like, oh, yeah, I like his videos. I watch those. Mine is utility. Did you see that guy doing the makeup tutorial on Reddit? And he made himself look like that chick who wouldn't do the game. Kim Winslow. Kim Davis.

Kim Davis, thank you. Yeah, Kim Winslow is an MMA referee. Here's one of him doing Snoop Dogg, and it's even better. Really? Well, shit, I think I just showed it. Oh, wow. Right? Damn. that's amazing

I was just the makeup thing yeah that's awesome hockey like you like that is talent right there yeah there's a kind of facial artistry that people can do with makeup that's kind of cool you didn't know this guy around Halloween that would be great to be friends with him he hook you up with whatever you wanted I like when

they do I've seen them do like archers style animation on people's faces and I love that it looks so cool mmm I've seen that I always wonder what that would look like in person though like from the different angles I always stand exactly like the characters do yeah you need to be you need to be at the right angle I feel like for that to be at it's most effective

yeah it's really cool though so I saw where we bombed that hospital from Doctors Without Borders and Obama publicly apologized to them, like personally apologized to the

president of Doctors Without Borders or whatever for the whole thing. What happened? Was there a link to this story? I can find one. I haven't been following this. I had heard about it briefly, but I didn't hear that many details. I keep head on sand most the time it's his bliss service without border yeah in Afghanistan did were we aiming at that building and we

thought it was something different or did we just hit the wrong building we have had four different stories concerning that but they did it on purpose they hit that what place on purpose Wow like like they did they know it was doctors without borders or there they've had four different excuses so I would hope not that That'd be pretty grim. If they were like, yeah, let's just shake their day up a bit. Much anyway.

I don't like them anyway. Yeah, I don't think that was it. So would that make Obama a war criminal? This morning in the Oval Office, President Obama spoke by telephone with Doctors Without Borders International President Dr. Joanne Liu to apologize and express his condolences for the MSF staff and patients who were killed and injured when a U.S. military airstrike mistakenly struck an MSF field hospital in Kunduz, Afghanistan, over the weekend. The President assured Dr. Liu that the Department of Defense investigation currently underway

would provide a transparent, thorough, and objective accounting of the facts and circumstances of the incident, and that if necessary, the President would implement changes that would make tragedies like this one less likely to occur in the future. After completing that call, the President telephoned Afghan President Ashraf Ghani to express his condolences for the innocent loss of life in that incident. The President commended the bravery of Afghan National Defense and Security Forces in securing Kunduz and noted that he looked forward to continuing to work closely with President Ghani, the Afghan, and the Afghan Government to support their efforts to provide security

for the Afghan people. Well, that sucks. Yeah, that's exactly what I was thinking. Same words. You know... Was that like a drone strike? I evaluate myself, right? When Bush did shit like this,

and he was bombing hospitals or just allowing bad things to happen, it was like, you're incompetent. You suck so much. You started this war. You're terrible, etc. When Obama does it, I think to myself,

well, I'm sure he didn't mean it. Well, yeah, because you like Obama. I do like Obama. And I didn't like Bush. And I feel like I'm even partly right I feel like Bush just gave less of a shit or understood that mistakes happen in war or maybe I'm

biased I have those same kind of biases but it wasn't a Republican Democrat type thing I just felt like bush's agenda was different like the intentions behind the actions were different yeah even though like the same outcomes could possibly occur it was like the intent yeah and i i wonder if that makes me biased or bad or dumb or whatever i'm not sure what of those things it is.

I just know Obama didn't mean to hurt people with this drone strike. I mean, obviously he meant to hurt people, but he didn't mean to hurt good guys. He didn't mean to take out Doctors Without Borders or this parallel organization, MSF. Medicine Sans Frontiers. parallel organization msf medicine sans frontiers um i i don't know but if bush had done this i don't think i'd be as forgiving and so i self-evaluate harshly on that yeah yeah if i had done this it would have been a huge parade of look at this idiot fumbling around again like much less so and i guess there was some reason for that because he did tend to trip into things more often or at least it was more publicized because he kind of gave off that vibe of a

hyuck hyuck you know yeah just up here doing my best oh you want a war bring it on yeah right meanwhile like people's children are out there fighting for America. Don't bring it on. Why would you say that? Right. Yeah. Yeah. But this sucks.

How many people died? Let's see. This. Oh, here it is. Killed 12 medical staff and at least 10 patients three of them children actually I was expecting a lot more than that another 37 were building did so 10 22 dead 37 wounded That's not a good one. That's a bad day. That's definitely bad.

He's yapping and yapping about gun control and how it could have saved like 12 people, but he's being real short and to the point about how he fucked up and killed 20 people. 22. 22. Probably more, because not all those injuries are stubbed toes and splinters. Some of them have got to be pretty

grievous. They could end up dying too. Could be. Yeah, that's rough. I also saw that Iran is in the region in Syria now. They've got ships in the Caspian Sea and I guess they shot a bunch of missiles the other day into Syria, and they actually landed in Iran.

So they bombed Iran. The Russians did. That was today, I think. Oh, the Russians bombed Iran by accident. Yeah. Oh, I'm so glad we didn't hear that. Right? Oh, man.

That whole thing's interesting. I heard that they conscripted 150,000 men to the army. And I read reports that that was quote, to wipe out ISIS or something like that. I'm interested to see what Russia's going to do in that region. I feel like we've created a bit of a power vacuum by pulling out the way we have. And Russia's going to do in that region. I feel like we've created a bit of a power vacuum by kind of pulling out the way we have,

and Russia's trying to fill it and become more influential with countries like the Saudis and everybody else who's in the area, saying, you know, the U.S. can't keep you safe anymore, but we can. I feel like it's bad on a global scale, what's going on over there currently. I just don't trust the Russians. I don't trust the Americans either,

but I definitely don't trust the Russians. I don't trust the Americans either. But I definitely don't trust the Russians. I listened to Putin's speech the other day and man, he made a lot of sense about some stuff. But you can't believe him any more than you believe our politicians. But he was saying, basically he was saying, the US isn't trying

to kill ISIS. It's clear they're not trying to kill ISIS. Look at how they're fighting this war. We're here to kill ISIS. We're here to kill all the rebels. But in fact, you know, they're propping up the Assad regime and killing the rebels who are directly going after him. They're bombing specifically in areas where those rebels who we consider friendly rebels were making advancements. That's where he's bombing the fuck out of them at. Although now I'm hearing, oh, he hit ISIS this, ISIS that. It's really hard to say.

It's a good old-fashioned proxy war. Yeah, I'd heard that Russia was bombing CIA-backed rebels or something like that, which is, in Afghanistan, what was in the 70s, early 80s, the freedom fighters of Afghanistan turned into... Mujahideen. Yeah.

They were the Taliban and pretty much al-Qaeda, which what it ended up being. They were the freedom fighters back in the day. At the end of Rambo 3, it used to say this film is dedicated to the brave Mujahideen, who were the Afghan fighters who propelled

the Russians. Now, in the updated version, it says this is dedicated to the gallant people of Afghanistan or something like that instead. Because that was the premise of Rambo 3. Rambo's going in to save his former commanding officer who's gotten in this

little proxy war between the Mujahideen and the Russians. And, you know, we were shipping them Stinger missiles and all that stuff. The Russians would fly these convoys of choppers in Afghanistan back in the day and the Afghanis couldn't touch them. They didn't have the technology until the CIA went over there and gave them a bunch of fucking Stinger

missiles. So one day this convoy of Russian helicopters comes over and they're flying in a convoy because they don't think the afghanis can touch them but now they the mujahideen has stingers and they wiped out a whole fucking convoy of russian choppers yeah that was uh charlie wilson's war right that was the plot of charlie wilson's war the tom hanks movie yeah i haven't seen that phil but I think so. I have seen it. And it must be. You're the resident expert. I've seen it more than once.

Yeah, that was what that movie was about. So now they're saying that we're doing kind of the same thing to try to overthrow the leader of Syria? No, nobody's saying that. I was just mentioning that. That's what I've heard, and I don't know if it's

conspiracy theories or if it's legitimate news outsourced. We've been trying to overthrow the Assad regime for a few years now, but not trying very hard. We're doing it with advisors and equipment and weapons and ammunition. And whenever they say advisors, you

really need to know that that's a couple different things. For one, they're sending special forces guys over there to train people up and help them a little bit. But those guys are actually fighting too. And for another, that often means mercenaries. Lots of mercenaries are involved. Blackwater type thing? Yeah, stuff like that, but not always guys from the U.S.

They get lots of mercenaries from south america and bring them over there there's it's a huge thing like a lot of the combatants over there are being paid to do what they're doing and so that's what putin was pointing out he was saying look the americans are arming this group and that group and this group because they're saying you know down with asad well next week all that happens is is isis rolls in there and says hey hey hey we, hey, we'll pay $150 a day. I like your rifle and your truck you got there. Bring that with you. And they're just hiring those

people to come fight for them. And some of those people are fine with that. They'll go to the highest bidder, I suppose. That thing is such a mess over there. It's worse than what we had 10 years ago. So that's kind of like the U.S. propping up ISIS by proxy of hiring people to go there

that eventually worked for ISIS. It's so convoluted, the trail of money and materiel and manpower that's over there that it's hard to follow. It easily could be that we're supporting, I don't know, we're slipping the Muslim Brotherhood don't know we're slipping the muslim brotherhood uh maybe guns and and money and and then the muslim brotherhood's siphoning right back to isis like there's no way that there are no good guys over there probably not related but you've seen that toyota thing that came out right like all these isis fighters have legions of brand new

like toyota tundras and toyota tacomas and trucks and suvs some badass trucks yeah they're nice trucks hold their value well right and then it's wondering like like i think some prominent politician or something brought it up to toyota and was like how the hell are they getting all these toyota all these brand new there's like oh those guys are getting in like there are only six miles on this car. That's Indian, but whatever. You understand. They're brand new. Wow. I saw a whole convo of those Toyota trucks.

And I don't remember what the Toyota slogan is. It's like, go somewhere or something like that. It was like, Toyota, go somewhere. And, you know, it's like, say, 35 identical Toyota trucks, ISIS guys all over them with weapons, you know, dressed in the black get-up and everything and the masks. I love what you do for me.

Toyota. Dude, I don't know. I just want to stay out. I want America not to be the one that fucks this up. I'd like to not be involved. Let ISIS attack Russia if they're going to attack someone and then russia will take no shit from a group like that neither would america really and uh there's

too much red tape for it though here like so much stuff has to be approved and delineated down and the people know everything about what's going on for the most not everything but more if they can just say yeah we're not going to deal with them anymore and uh who's going to stop oh yeah right nobody can stop me because i'm fighting i disagree man so right now america is weary of all our wars and that bullshit seems like we've been in the middle east making trouble for 15 years now or something i don't even know but if they were to knock down another building america would be like, holy shit, Boeing, kick that shit into overdrive. We got some killing to do.

McDonnell Douglas, Lockheed Martin, Smith and Wesson, get your act together. We got killing. I don't know who. We need revolvers. Who would make a heckler and cock? I don't know. Knight's Armvers who would make a heckler and cock

I don't know who would make a knight's armament alright glock whatever whoever's outfitting the army get to work I want a hundred thousand deaths you know that's what America would be on if they knocked down a building hopefully there's no like people

in a dark smoky room thinking the same thing. I swear. We need another event. If we had nuked Afghanistan and turned that country into glass I think America would still be like well, now we're even.

Yeah, probably. It's a very sensitive area. What would be the next target that they would do to elicit a response like Hoover Dam? I'm sorry Hoover Dam the Hoover Dam. Oh, it's not like the concrete was even all the way dry If you break it, I don't think the Hoover Dam is a is a I mean, I don't think they could it's a toughie Isn't it? I mean it is that nuclear, you hit that with a 747, it might be okay. Nuclear plant, well,

so I was talking to my cousin about this recently because he's working in these nuclear plants all over them. And he was talking about the missile and plane defense systems at these nuclear power plants are ridiculous. The redundancy that's built in. There's like 12 feet of concrete followed by an inch of plate steel followed by more concrete with rebar in it he said but the rebar that's sort of woven

into this concrete like this is this big around like it's not like that little stuff it's a huge rebar in this thing so like but the outside's protected what about like getting hackers and hacking in shutting down systems like coolant pumps yeah like there was some code that they say is written by the united states that was a virus that infected like so many computers in the world but it didn't do anything on most of the computers the world it only attacked the centrifuges that were in iran that's the greatest story yeah you think isis could pull that off? It went in on a thumb drive.

That was interesting. Because that nuclear facility was completely cut off. There was no internet at that nuclear facility. It wasn't networked up. It was, well, because it was networked up. But it wasn't connected to the outside world in any way. So, like, the only way it would work, and they knew the only way it would

work, is if someone who's working in that plant goes home and uh and brings it back from home so this guy had a thumb drive he brought it back from his home computer stuck it in his work computer the worm gets in speeds those centrifuges up a little bit and ruins them yeah but the worm was so widespread that it just it went all over the world it It was like everyone could possibly be infected, but it doesn't do anything on anything except for if it's on that network with the centrifuges. I don't think they would even attack a nuclear power plant. If they wanted to elicit a human reaction from the Americans,

they'd have to attack somewhere like the World Trade Centers where there's a ton of people around, or even the Hoover Dam. There's not that many people around there, right? I feel like they'd want to see us power. Yeah, it would be downstream of, well, I don't know, is Lake Mead dry now? Probably? I don't know. The Hoover Dam makes power. That's why

I said that. Hoover Dam... I was just thinking because they want to scare us if they were going to do it, maybe, or maybe not they could hit the CDC center in Atlanta they could hit Las Vegas Strip, obviously incredibly populous place, any sporting

stadium I've always thought would be the scariest possibility because I don't know, look at a college football game, you know there's like 80,000 people There's like 80,000 people. You get like 80,000 people in those stadiums. Some of those stadiums, like Happy Valley, I think might hold like 100,000 plus. Could be completely wrong about that. But still, when you've got 80, 100,000 people in one small area like that in a football stadium,

it just seems like some sort of gas attack or poison or even just an explosive. A drone spraying something over the whole stadium. Yep, poison. Anything like that. I'm terrified now. I'm not leaving my house. It makes one to two billion kilowatt hours annually. I don't even know if that seems

like a lot to me. One point twenty one gigawatts. But yeah, I heard somewhere that it makes something like 50% of the Northwest's power that's individually, like Seattle would black out and all this crazy stuff. I could be wrong on that. If they attack our energy infrastructure, I hope they hit some of those bullshit propeller things, windmills in Kansas. Just go down and take one of those out.

One dude sitting at home has his kitchen light go out. Oh, well, fuck. We've been terrorized. Why do you think that windmills are such bullshit? They just are so expensive. And from the tiny bit of, I can't stress how tiny the amount of research was that I did into it. It doesn't seem like they give very much. It takes a long time for them to pay for themselves.

But I feel like they all do. And it's contingent on the weather around them. But on a mass scale, like out in West Texas, I know that there's huge fields of these things that are sitting in barren lands generating power, which that's cool. But if you have a big windmill outside your house, that would be annoying they make noise from from what i read the deal was that you created

more pollution in the creation of the windmill itself than you would ever make up for uh by the clean energy that it produces so you've been better off if you just burnt coal and just foregone the whole windmill. That fits my narrative. I accept that as fact. Yeah, see, that's the thing! That's the thing! I find that hard to believe. What kind of pollutants are being released

by creating a windmill? Well, it's a giant generator, so there's I think there's some processes that go into creating it that are highly polluting. I feel like like when they do that they go down the whole rabbit hole like all right first thing we had to get metal so we made these giant trucks that stand 30 feet tall to carry the dirt metal combo from one place to the other then we heated it then we did this and we did it well not all of that that was created just for the windmill. There's steel factors that are

always making steel that we just bought some. A similar thing happened to the Prius. They said, oh yeah, the Prius actually is not good for the environment. When you count all the R&D and all the everything that went into it, you might as well get a Humvee. As if the Humvee had no R&D. As if it did have...

Don't tell me Priuses aren't As if the Humvee had no R&D. As if it did have, like, you know, that. Don't tell me Priuses aren't good for the environment. You might not like them. I don't want one. But I recognize they're green. I want a Tesla. Yeah, that'd be cool. But, yeah, I have a hard time buying this notion that windmills are so expensive and ridiculous to make that they don't pay back.

All right, let me do some Googling here. Yeah, I'm about to look up a very simple, I'll try and find like a BuzzFeed article. Five ways windmills are ruining your life. I think for the amount of power that is generated, nuclear power plants are probably the best. The first one. Ten main reasons wind power is not a plausible substitution for gas.

All I googled was windmills suck. Should windmills blow. So what is it? Lay on the bad things about windmills. All right, this doesn't look like a very good list, but let's see. Only downside to wind power is that it doesn't get work done if there is no wind. Sometimes birds are killed.

That's true. You don't know how many endangered birds are flying around there. And bats. And bats. You can't forget bats. No operation waste. And some of these aren't even complete sentences. This is not a good list at all.

I should have done better Googling. Slow down the rotation of the earth very slowly. Eventually we will start traveling back in time. That fits Taylor's narrative. I accept it. I accept that as fact. That's what daylight savings time is. It's a ploy to hide the fact that

these windmills are taking a year longer. Gets the same big subsidies big oil gets. This is not reputable. There has to be, no matter how much even environment, eco-friendly oil is a finite resource eventually we're going to have to figure out a way

to maintain our energy consumption with alternative means that can last forever I was going to read from this website and then I read the tagline at the top climate conversation group taking the heat out of global warming. For the first time in history,

those shouting, the end is nigh, are the sane ones. While those of us who say it is not are now the lunatics. Yeah, this is a climate change denying website. That's a shame. Although I did read a little bit or hear a little bit more about, so you know they say there's this 97% consensus of scientists on climate change. I learned a

little bit about what that's 97% of. It ended up being 75 scientists and I think 7 or 8 of them were from California. There were more scientists from California than there were from Australia, Europe and Australia and Europe even. It was mostly United States scientists and of those most of them were California based and they had to, they picked and chose the questions that were asked and they removed like over a hundred scientists from the conversation because they didn't vote the way they wanted them to. So I believe in global warming, and I believe it's caused by human beings.

However, that 97% consensus seems to be kind of a made-up number when you look at how it was derived. Well, we know that there is like, if you release carbon into the atmosphere, there could be the greenhouse effect and it'll cause the earth to get warmer. There's no disputing that. So what is the argument of, you know, greenhouse effect does not exist on a small scale.

I just found this, uh, a wind, a small wind turbine, as they call it, pays for itself in 14.9 years yeah alright wind power

make it happen for 30 years what's the lifetime of a windmill like how long are they expected to last assuming it works perfectly forever but what you said isn't accepted by a lot of people including a lot of our politicians like they don't believe what you just said you're like oh but you know,

greenhouse gases go up. I thought that's just a scientific fact. If you build a greenhouse, it gets hot in there. Hot and muggy. A windmill lasts 20 to 25 years. It's the same kind of effect of carbon dioxide. Is that

not proven? No, that's science. Sounds good. It's still a theory. Climate, you know, global warming is. And, yeah. Like the greenhouse effect. Is that not a fact? Calling something a theory is kind of a cop-out.

Gravity is a theory. Of course it is. Wait, isn't gravity a law? No, gravity's a law. But evolution is a theory. But the situation there, yeah, evolution's a theory. Gravity's a law. But evolution is a theory. But the situation there, yeah, evolution's a theory, gravity's a law. Promise.

But it could be demonstrated on a scale of if you create an environment like an artificial greenhouse effect, that it can be repeatable and provable. Absolutely, that is true. But the discussion there, and I'm not on this side of the argument i'm just playing devil's devil's advocate here is that on a global scale they don't believe that it translates they don't believe that there is man-made climate change they believe that the earth is continuously going through heating and cooling phases all the time um which is true yeah cycles of the sun on like a 14 year cycle of getting more energy output. I was reading about

what they call the little ice age that happened a couple hundred years ago a while back. They were talking about how, is it the Thames in London? Is it the Thames River that runs through? They were talking about how that thing used to freeze over solid and they would have like a winter ice festival out on that thing

where everybody would be on the river on the ice. That shit doesn't happen anymore. That shit doesn't freeze anymore. So I'm not... I feel like... There's a big global procession of the Earth too that it changes position

on a huge... What was the Mayan calendar cycle? There's this huge big big cycle, too. There's so much going on. You have to be an expert in so many different things to be an expert on human-created climate change. I feel like it's almost difficult to find worthy individuals to believe because you need to know about the oceans, you need to know about the clouds,

you need to know about what the sun's doing. You have to be an expert in a dozen different fields to really before I'm really gonna trust your opinion but I believe in global warming I think it's our fault whether or not we're gonna like melt down in the next 50 years or not I think it's I don't know I think we're in a nice sweet spot of it like we'll be long long dead before this shit gets real or anything hits the fan like Maybe your great-great-grandkids, maybe that is really

going to bite them in the ass, but we won't even like... Our tombstones will be fading a little bit. Why did Grandpa have to have a flamethrower? Yeah, why did he have to have three? The oil that is being burned that is causing the problem will probably be depleted

in the next hundred years and then it won't be a problem anymore after that. The Earth will correct itself. Eventually. Nature finds its way. It's a matter of whether we're here or not and whether we're happy with what we got.

A little bit of climate change could throw the oceans out of whack or something and ruin a lot of our food comes from the oceans. What if there's something that killed off the sea life and we didn't have as much food? You could be thrown into a global catastrophe really quickly without the ice caps melting. Yeah, but on the plus side, all the hippies would die out because they'd refuse to eat GMOs. I would love that.

I have no fear of GMOs. I don't think there's anything wrong with that stuff. You just eat it. Neither do scientists. There's a scientific consensus that GMOs are fine as well. And I love this because I think we all agree that the Republicans are a bunch of climate denying, you know, I'm not a scientist accepting bullshit fucknards, right? Like it's frustrating for them to be like, well, I'm not a scientist accepting bullshit fucknards, right? Like, it's frustrating for them to be like,

well, I'm not a scientist, so I assume there's no global warming, etc., etc. On the other hand, the liberals, of which maybe I am one, I don't know, they tend to deny GMOs and just, oh, I can't eat that stuff. No, you know, you bred two tomato plants? Fuck that. Count me out. Yeah, like corn, just in the way that we eat it now is a genetically like modified food. You and your facts.

That doesn't belong here on MSNBC. Gluten is the worst. Gluten is the worst to me. I know it's a little bit different than the GMO stuff, but I feel like it's pretty similar at the same time. It's just fucking yuppies want to make something oh no did you see the movie this is the end yeah yeah yeah and in there the guy's like oh no i'm gluten intolerant i don't eat that and he's like what are glutens glutens you know like they're things that are bad for you that's how i i don't know what a gluten is i think it's

something to do with bread yeah wheat or wheat or something. It comes from wheat. It comes from wheat. That's where the gluten's coming from. And there's no reason why you shouldn't be eating it. Is it literally an ingredient? Is there gluten on stuff? I think it's naturally occurring in wheat. Yeah, it's part of flour. It's part of wheat. But I mean, people could be lactose intolerant. Bullshit! No, stop. No, there's, people could be lactose intolerant. Why couldn't they? Bullshit!

No, stop. No, there's a reason people are lactose intolerant. The reason people are lactose intolerant is because milk is a whole new thing for us as a species. That just came about in the last few 10,000 years. But so is refining wheat and eating wheat. Bullshit! No, no. It's not people in caveman times eating wheat.

And haven't women been making... You're wrong about that. Haven't moms been making milk for more than 10,000 years? Let me spit this out. Okay. So you're wrong about this. So the dairy thing doesn't go back very far at all. That's why lactose intolerance is a thing.

Because human beings, not all of us, have figured out how to digest this stuff. Wheat, however, goes back. They recently discovered much, much farther back than they ever thought before. But it's probably only thousands of years. 100,000 years or something like that. Mothers have been breastfeeding babies for more than 10,000 years. That's different. Well, there's a difference between dairy

and mother's milk. Oh, now you're milkist. No, now I'm just correct. You're fucking milkist and now you're coming out on the show as milkist. Oh, only human milk is good enough for Kyle See him. I can see him squeezing a booby for his Kellogg's corn flakes every day a huge percentage of the population Like be told by the world like white people are way less likely to be Lactose intolerant than other ethnicities and races is this whole conversation designed to prop up your tilk business

ethnicities and races is this whole conversation designed to prop up your tilk business it's an elaborate but uh yeah as far as celiacs disease which is like when you actually have an intolerance even that like i was looking it up because like i read online that someone was like well if you know uh someone said like oh i you know gave someone something with gluten in it and they said that they couldn't eat gluten and they didn't even notice and so i was like well if they'd had celiac disease that could have been disastrous and i was like oh i wonder what the side effects actually are and it sounds a lot like you know like in extreme cases it can cause problems like serious problems extreme like if you take a big bag of gluten and you just start forcing well yeah there's people that are allergic to just about anything you can think of. For the most part,

it's giving them the shits and some gas. It's not like, oh my god, that was regular Domino's pizza, and then they're in the bathroom frantically trying to vomit before they pass out and die. Even then, it's all just a fad. This is gonna die out just like... I don't know.

Quinoa's gonna die out. Fuck quinoa. I think that there's still people that do have the condition. There's probably a larger majority of people that are just like, no, I don't eat gluten. But there's probably people that really have conditions that if they eat

bread, they have problems. Yeah, they'll fuck with their digestion a little bit. My wife makes me quinoa and whenever she does i know that dinner will suck that day oh yeah it's like depressing rice yeah rice with your meals well you're gonna love sad rice it's like it's like rice that dropped out of college and didn't quite finish his at the flavor institute of food almost food that's what birds should be eating quinoa is the worst quinoa is so awful it's i tried so hard to like it there are things you can do to it to make it good i like it with um

like avocado uh kind of you can make um sort of a guacamole out of avocado and greek yogurt and i like i like mixing that with the the quinoa quinoa is not great though it's just not it's a i don't even know what a quinoa is it's awful rice it is flavorless like rice with but they're smaller flavorless what's what's the positive aspects of quinoa um it's supposed to be a superfood yeah my powers have not arrived i don't think it's a carbohydrate either no it is I think I can't even spell it

quinoa it's known for it's high protein content but it does have I just remember like my ex girlfriend had to eat quinoa and uh it's supposed to be like a lower carb alternative to rice. I heart quinoa as a website.

Gluten free quinoa. Oh my god, I'm disgusted. Can we have a new topic? Yeah, yeah, but I am right about this. I guarantee. So dairy, the reason that lactose intolerance is a thing is because dairy hasn't been going on that long. I would like to see the agricultural

or archaeological evidence of bread. I'm having a hard time finding it right now. But to make bread is really easy. I don't know if you've ever taken – you can take wheat. I've taken wheat in my hand and you can just hit it with something and it turns into flour instantly. Like you just mash wheat and it turns into flour. But they found evidence that it goes back much, much farther than than they just squeezed talcate cow titties and they turn into milk right well you got to catch a pregnant cow first

no renat I I don't know I don't think it would be the same kind of cows either it's not like the dastard cows that we've selectively brewed it to be our it was in milk it was like it wasn't cows at all. Yeah, it was some wild deer thing running... Goat. Yeah, a goat. Goat. It was goats. Are you guys queued up at zero on this video? On the tweet? On the tweet. How do I access the video portion of this? Oh, I see now. Are we ready? Yeah. Oh, so before you play, here's the background. The person filming this is that dude's wife.

And the dude is like sexually molesting or proposing or harassing the maid. And ready, set, play. She is not appreciating his handsy seduction style. Where is this? Saudi Arabia. Well, I'm sure they'll kill his wife soon. It's funny you mention that. His wife is like on trial now like they're i think they're

like yeah did she take that she took this video she took this video and uh so it shamed him and now she's being tried for shaming her husband yeah yeah i wonder if I can find the article on it, but apparently, yeah, she's in a lot of trouble. What a weird world. That's happening at the same time we're doing a podcast. Isn't that odd? And they were obviously recording it on the phone, so they've got technology there, but they're still so backwards in so many ways. It's just odd. It's a weird juxtaposition.

Yep. I can't seem to find a article about it but anyway yeah she she took this thing she posted it online and uh and and now she's like you know being charged with a crime because his her husband i you know, wants to fuck the maid and he's pretty forward about making it happen. And how dare you intervene or shame me for trying? How is Saudi Arabia an ally? Oh, you have to hit

the camera thing to bring it back. They've got a lot of oil. A lot of oil, yeah. You know they're like in charge of UN human rights? Mm-hmm. And they just like be added someone three days ago or something through somebody today how did you hit your camera icon it looks like maybe you didn't but I'm not sure

oh it says you've reached our four-hour limit or there you go now you should all come back in a few minutes does anyone have video no I got spinning wheels waiting on Taylor and wicked give it a minute interesting I think I was last one to hit the button the first one to come back now I have a wider shot of myself so what's the name of the crime they're charging you with do you know shit I need to find it again. Now, I will say this.

I think it was a shitty thing that she did. I don't think what she did is appropriate at all. Now, what he did is way out there. He's assaulting that lady. But what she did isn't cool either. Yeah, they're both bad. And I can definitely see how it's not cool in their society. So I got no problem with her being charged with something.

But she'll most likely be executed. Nah, I think they might whip her a little or something like that. I doubt they'll kill her for filming her husband. If he wants her dead, she will be. Well, if he wants her dead, he'll do it himself. She was using hold of the camera. So there's an update on this. I translated the Arabic replies on Twitter.

I didn't do that. I'm reading about it. And some were very difficult to understand, but the general gist seems to be the husband was wrong for this, but the wife was asking for divorce and imprisonment for defaming the husband's character by releasing the video without permission, betraying her husband. So the gist from the comments is she's asking for imprisonment by defaming her husband.

This is the most alarming part. There was a paraphrased extension of many of the comments all rolled into one. A lot of the Saudis commenting believe she deserves punishment for uploading this video. Then there's an edit. It appears as though she will not be imprisoned as she was merely sued by her husband and he will be the one facing charges. This is good news,

but it's still disturbing that the mindset of the people is that she was wrong for this. So Kyle, your mindset is disturbing? It just makes sense. It just makes sense. Like if, I don't know,'m a matt i'm sure at one point or another we've all acted in a way that that you know we're we would feel embarrassed or ashamed of after the fact and we learn from those experiences like i shouldn't have done that but

what you don't want is your significant other your wife to film you doing it and then upload it on the internet like she fucked up and not as badly as he did he's assaulting that lady but i in their culture i can definitely see why they're giving her a hard time about this she definitely did something wrong i feel like this has happened to me a couple times recently like where there's this 90 10 situation in the blame and i'm the 10 and a fair amount of people are like ah look what you did you done fucked up and it's like all right maybe a little can we focus on the 90 here and uh yeah i don't know i'm i'm kind of like dude that guy was that maid was probably fearful for her safety Well, from what you said about the results,

it looks like people are focusing on the 90 for the most part, aside from like the Twitter verse and those assholes. Like everyone who's not from there is focusing on the 90. Like I still get what Kyle's saying about like, I just, I don't like the feel, like that vibe of like the secret recording and then uploading without confronting someone. Like the kind of subvers uploading without confronting someone like the,

the kind of subversive way where it's like, Oh, I caught you doing something and I'm not going to confront you about it. It's going to be a surprise to you and everyone else when this is like, we should be like, like I, there's like a television show, the cheater show.

That's what it's like. Yeah. There's no way to bring it up to him. Like, so there's that culture and that culture. I'd be interested to know whether so there's no culture in that culture i'd be interested to know whether what he's doing is in a how inappropriate what he's doing is because like in ours obviously it's like oh he just fucked up he's assaulting that woman he could lose his job

over that he could easily lose his marriage and you know she could she could sue this guy in civil court like it'd be a whole thing if if but in theirs maybe this isn't a big deal at all i i but what she did is a big deal in in any culture i struggle with that because i used to think the same thing as you maybe go back five ten years it's like well culturally things are just different there but then it's like whoa whoa whoa I disagree with that now. The me of today is like there is a right and there is a wrong, and you can't allow bullshit to happen just because it's a different culture. There is no culture where getting handsy and fucking holding a woman up against the bathroom sink doggy style is okay.

Like right and wrong can't be a cultural thing. Yeah, right. And this is a thing that liberals do in particular. Like they just completely accept any culture, even if it's immoral, right? And that's... Well, that's just what they do. Yeah.

They punch women in the face. That's what they do. Meanwhile, if they disagree about a tiny part of our culture, it's an emergency. If that woman doesn't cover her hair, we rip the antenna off a car and beat her with it. But hey, some cultures do that, so let's not pass too many judgments. Don't want to seem intolerant. Our culture does stuff too.

I mean, maybe the Saudis are like, yeah, as soon as the baby's born, first thing they do is cut the tip of his dick as the baby's born first thing they do is cut the tip of his dick off that's what that's the first thing they do over there as soon as every every boy when he's born cutting his dick that's the first thing they do then and they could go through a whole thing like that i'm sure there's plenty of things we do that seem abhorrent and we like a pretty penis i do yeah i wish i had a choice i think I was circumcised without my consent So like I've seen a lot of penises Get on my level

I'll never achieve what you have Yes Too many years of swimming and hockey Sometimes with the circumcision I've noticed They don't do a good job They did a great job on me, I feel like. It's, everything's symmetrical, there's no scarring, really, like, like, everything looks

good down there. There's no bits still dangling off or anything, but every now and then I just want to... You don't know what's in the terms of pleasure, because I think that was the original idea, was like the decent... Oh yeah, I wish I could come faster! Yeah, but... That's what I got. But every now and then I see where the top of the head of the penis

is still kind of connected to the shaft by a fold of skin that's just there, and that I don't like. That looks awful. That's no good. But then I see there's these guys who have anteater cocks where when they get an erection, the foreskin won't even stretch enough for their cock head to go through it so they it'll tear or rip there's

all kinds of issues so i did a series called male monday and a lot of people would write to me and say that their penis couldn't go through the tip of their foreskin and i like that would suck i'm not like that i was i didn't really know how to handle it but it was a pretty common Christian they threw mine away about 29 years ago I can't help you I should let you keep it I can't mind but it was like that little piece of skin as a baby ends up being like a pretty substantial amount of skin as an adult that's removed really like if stressed it all out it's probably like a sheet probably like a big amount of skin that's a lot of nerves and pleasure sensors are in that yeah you ever see where like they'll be what that you got like one guy

Who's cut and one who's not cut and and he'll stick his dick inside of the guys? Yeah, the old tab a into tab B You know that That's pretty dark. You just jerk it in the middle? Yeah, that's great. Ah, yeah. Look at me, I'm circumcised. You're circumcised. I'm circumcised!

It's like if someone has a long sleeve shirt and you kind of share one sleeve. That's exactly what it's like. Oh my god. Yeah, I think they should not do that i think everybody most people are on that same page like just don't circumcise it becomes a problem get it taken care of but let's not go hacking little bits off no i'm glad that i got circumcised if i go back i would get

circumcised again um but you don't know that i do every year. You live to a point where you were circumcised. I bet that there's more pleasure in an uncircumcised penis for the penis owner. We've been through this. I don't want to come any faster than currently. It feels great already. I don't need any more than this. It really does. It's like, oh, you like that ice cream?

Yeah, yeah. It could be even colder, you know. It's like, it's fucking cold enough, bro. I'm getting an ice cream headache already. I'm happy with this. It's like colder. No, it wouldn't be a colder ice cream? Yeah, yeah. It could be even colder, you know. It's like, it's fucking cold enough, bro. I'm getting an ice cream headache already. I'm happy with this. Like, colder? No, it wouldn't be a colder ice cream. It'd be a bigger bowl with more toppings. Whatever, you know. Or a big chunk of skin wrapped

around it so you can't get to the ice cream the way you want or something. I don't know what it would be. Well, then you would get it taken care of. Yeah. If your ice cream bowl had a foreskin and you were constantly trying to get in there to get to it, you wouldn't want that. I would remove that. Off your ice cream bowl.

It's not to quite the same extent, but there are places where they'll cut the clitoris off like baby females to desensitize. Female genital mutilation. Yeah, it's awful. Now the goal of that is to deprive

the woman of sexual pleasure. Because it's not like... Challenge accepted. Now if they just remove the hood of the clitoris, that would be like a female circumcision. But they lop the hood and the clitoris and everything right off. They do it differently in different areas,

is my understanding. And if they did remove the hood, then it exposes the clitoris to being rubbed on and everything. And that's what desensitizes. Which is the same thing that happens to a circumcised penis that gets desensitized

from being exposed all the time. There should just be a policy to not put anything sharp towards a child's genitals until you're absolutely sure that you need to. It shouldn't just be like, all right, right out of the gate. I agree. I'm all for the circumcision. I think, you know, why not?

I prefer what I got. Why not? What if they botch it? What if it's all fucked up? You were just saying that. What if you were unlucky and your doctor had, you know, come in exhausted? And I'll tell you what. If I were getting my kid circumcised I'd make it I'd be a part it would be a big deal

be like hey we're gonna do this let's absolutely the best baby dick cutter in the nation yeah I want to play I would want a plastic surgeon to do it I feel like normally they just got like whatever doctors around is like yeah hey bill you got your pocket knife? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You got a little Swiss Army thing with little mini scissors? Yeah, I got a cigar cutter. Yeah, oh, that'll work. You don't be reaching over.

He's over there reaching into his humidor trying to cut your baby's dick off. You don't want that. But you want a professional. But I prefer being circumcised. Would you make an event out of it? Would you throw a big wrist party? But, Steve, you're saying that you prefer it without knowing the alternative

as far as experiencing it. I prefer the physical. I prefer the appearance. I feel like that's better. And you're telling me that maybe it's going to be more pleasurable. Not interested in having that. I know that requires some more,

some higher degree of maintenance to make sure you don't get like shmegma and fucking dick cheese in there smelling like an infected fucking sore around your cock head. Right. Anything like that. My dick's always fucking clean. And you know what it takes to clean it? I can wet my hand, do that three times, and it's clean again. I don't want to be digging around in the, around foreskin and, like, needing to be in the shower to make my dick not smell like rotten ass

like that's not there's no way that's the case that's like that is the case we should we should cut these kids yeah do you know if you leave the same socks on for three months and dip your feet in wet water and let it sit that it'll be gross my friend from high school told me like he was uncircumcised i brought those things up to him i'm like don't you have to do something special like cleaning it and somebody's like i just get in the shower and you know wash my dick don't you just wash your dick that's all i do it's not no big deal yeah yeah i think that like there's this huge process of smegma removal taylor are you circumcised or not? I am. You are. Yeah, I think. Are we all? I am, yeah.

So we all are. Don't do it until you know. It's too risky. I think he is, yeah. Most Americans are. I think it's becoming less and less common now. I wouldn't get my kid circumcised. Let him decide.

Stick skins, good way it is. I wouldn't get my kids are let him decide stick skins. Yeah, good way it is. I wouldn't want to I Would cut it off right now if I had a force game Well that would make it interesting for the show I wish I had it again. so I could cut it off a second time Bastard What did you do when you cut it off? I fucking ate it

I gained its power I have the numbers So over the course of 1979 To 2010 The rate at which children Got circumcised Went from 64.5% to 58%. In the U.S.?

Yeah, and this is just U.S. Almost 50-50. Yes, it went from 64.5% to 58%. I'm a little surprised. I thought it would be closer to 100% in both regards. Not 100%, but it would go from 90% to 80%. So, yeah, that's it. You're on the right path then. I think so, too. 90 to 80. So yeah, that's it. Yeah.

On the right path. Then, you know, I think so too. I think circumcision is probably a bad idea. I do think they look better. It's like plastic surgery for your cock. Right.

But awareness for this, like posters, like what do you do when you see baby dick skin? You don't fuck with. Yeah. I'm sure there's, I haven't seen a large amount of uncircumcised penises

to know if they're all just all of them are ugly I've seen a lot of cock if you have any questions there's different vaginas some look good straight out of the box some might need a little cleaning up you know I would agree I would say guys

are pretty much equivalent yeah some some with their foreskins look pretty good and they they pop out of that poor skin and foreskin looking like a man some of them you know not so good right anteater don't want that or the ones that look like like if you buy a tiny kid like a triple xl hoodie and the sleeve is just way down to here, and it's like, what's going on there? What's that for? Like an old wizard sleeve.

Yeah. I want that. It's like when you take the straw wrapper off and just kind of leave that extra part to dangle just a tiny bit. Not good. Anyway, I've had enough of this. Good talk, good talk. That's enough oh i know for you we make the show six hours keep it going

we talked about that on pkn oh here's a thing so the united states marines have now unveiled gender neutral standards for 29 jobs. Apparently what happened was they went into this and they measured these teams of people. Some teams were all men and some teams were mixed. And they went into it thinking that the mixed teams would perform on the same level as the all men teams. Of course not. Why would they think that? That's what they say in the article. It turns out, this is from the Marine Times,

that 100% of the time, the teams with women on them did worse in these tasks. Now that's just sexist. I don't like these facts. They should be removed. A sexist stopwatch

and stuff. On top of that, I forget how many women were in this. Now, are these all physical activity jobs? Because I would think the jobs that don't require physical strength could potentially be on equals with unlawful men. Sure. Okay. The jobs were in the following fields. Infantry, artillery, combat engineering,

tanks and amphibious assault vehicles, ground ordnance, and some close air support roles. So these all seem like things like if you've got to take a big shell and load it into a tank. Yeah. A guy is going to do that better than a woman. In some cases, they're um they're very big heavy durable vehicles that have um almost like the front of a trailer you have to like

pick it up and put it on a hitch right a dude's gonna do that better almost almost 100% time and then um i forget i wish i could see how many women there are let me see if i can that whole thing surprising to anyone yeah I know it's what should be surprising is that is that they'll they'll push them through and then they'll pretend like these women met the same qualifications as men but it always comes out at the end that like I saw I think it was Army Rangers a while back these two or three women qualified not for combat but but just to be Army Rangers or something like that and it came out it came out

that during training they weren't required to carry the heavy machine gun because you know they take turns carrying that big motherfucker um they there was a number of tasks that they didn't have to like work as hard as the men so if you look at all the requirements and things that they have to do to pass like even basic training it's like women have to do like seven push-ups and men do 15 or something you know it's always lower bar it's horses so here's the thing so listen to this I made that up there were two dozen women in the infantry country there are two dozen women so hold on that now god damn it people there were two dozen women in the infantry company when the experiment began and all but

two dropped out due to injury. So 22 out of the 24 women got hurt as they did this. Four quit. Shouldn't be doing that. 100% of the groups with women in it did worse. And as a result out of this thing, they're going to have standards where it doesn't matter what sex you are. And I'm sure that's sexist somehow, but I don't know.

It should be. It doesn't matter who you are, what you are, where you were born, ethnicity, sex, just all the same standard. If you can do the amount of push-ups and carry the shit, go hog wild. Go over there and do what you want to do. It should be a requirement of, you know, this is what is required to do this task. If you can do this requirement, then you can do the task.

It shouldn't be, well, if you can do half of this, what is needed to do the job, you can make it since you're a girl. Yeah, it shouldn't be that. You still can't do the job. It shouldn't be push-ups and sit-ups and stuff because that stuff's body weight, right? Like, you know, you need to be able to carry someone else out, you know? So, like, I like more objective stuff. You can do this kind of bench press. weight right like you know you need to be able to carry someone else out you know so like i like

more objective stuff you can do this kind of bench press you can do this kind of you know whatever sandbag drag if you want to simulate the tallest biggest guy on your squad or your battalion or whatever and be like all right you go limp and all of you have to carry him you have to drag him out of the sunroof on a humvee because you might have to do that. And if you can't, then you're not suitable for this job. Whew. I don't know. I've seen a lot of those. You got to be stout.

Like, if a 200-pound man's limp in a Humvee, like, getting him out the top would be a serious job. There aren't any women that could do that. There just aren't. There may be some bodybuilders, or some specialized athletes of women who can do that. There just aren't. There may be some bodybuilders, some specialized athletes of women who can do that. Ronda Rousey could do it. But your average...

I'll get you a picture. What's she squat? I don't know. That would all be upper body. It's probably 325 or something. I was thinking like getting them out the top. I don't know if Ronda Rousey could do that. No, she could not. I don't know if she could Rousey could do that No, I don't know if she could do I was standing on the hood

Ronda Rousey doing that would be like me grabbing a 370 pound man and doing the same thing with him or like yeah Yes, really twice your body weight. It's twice her body weight. She's not an aunt shit This woman's just strong for a 135 pound woman She's just strong for a 135-pound woman. She could totally do it. I think she walks around at like 150.

A 200-pound man? No. First, 150-pound. I want to know what Ronda Rousey bench presses because I bet Taylor bench presses more right now than Ronda Rousey does. I know he does. I guarantee it. I bet I do. I bet she can't bench. I bet I bench presses more right now than Ronda Rousey does. I know he does. I guarantee it. I bet I do. I bet she can't bench 180. I bet I don't.

I bet Ronda Rousey cannot bench 180. No, well, that's just genetics. She's a hard worker and really impressive. Hey, I'm not taking anything away from her. I'm just saying she couldn't haul Woody out of the roof of a Humvee. No, no chance. It's not fair to jeopardize the safety of other people

under, like, the guise of being inclusive. It's like, this isn't the kind of job you want to be inclusive in. You don't want a firefighter knocking at your door who barely skidded by the final exams of, like, you know what, you want him to host your ass. Yeah, yeah. You fail... Carry you with one arm.

Three out of ten. Fire axe a door out of the way with the other. Kick it open and fucking oxygen tank on his back. Not giving a fuck. He's already loaded down with gear as a fireman. You're the guy who just headbutted your door open and then screamed at the fire until it surrendered. You want someone intense.

The flames are in the way, so you just Superman blows them. The fuck do you think you're doing? Alright, alright. But yeah, it should be based on it shouldn't be how many push-ups or sit-ups, like you said, because that shows physical fitness, and that's not what we're going for. We're going for combat readiness, and

not many women are combat ready to the standards of, especially to the standards of special forces and the Army Rangers and stuff like that. If they can do the task, then they should go in. If they can't, they shouldn't. I'm not worried about a woman's toughness out on the battlefield. I'm worried about her upper body strength, her bench press. I'm worried about how much weight she can lift over her head.

Yeah, if they can do it, let them do it. But that's why this is even, I guess, not even controversial in the first place. It's because they know if they enact this, it's suddenly, oh, well, suddenly our numbers just went really strongly in one direction. I don't know much,

but I know that when you're in a unit, you know, you share responsibilities. And if one member of that unit weighs 30 pounds less than every other member of the unit, and that's being generous, that person's just not putting as much into it. More like 70. It's not a thing. Yeah, not fair. I just feel like you don't know what a fireplug this woman is.

No, it's not about that. It's about just physical capabilities. That would like like you that would be like you she's five three five four woody could you pull someone who weighed 400 and 400 pounds who was six seven out of a situation like that because that's like the equivalency you couldn't and in no world could you well there's a 220 guy gone too much she probably weighs like 150 you know and not on weight cut day where she hits 135. But she probably weighs 150.

And the question was 200 pound man. And I think that she'd pick a 200 pound man up and toss him around quite easily. No, not a chance. She doesn't lift weights at all. She doesn't do any lifting none nah no way I'm sure that because of her

judo experience and stuff that yeah she could twist and spin and get her hips under him and stuff she could totally kick my ass I'm sure of that do you know how hard it would be for you to do this to pick up a 200 pound man who had just gone limp? I think she's stronger than me.

No. No, not even close. Not her upper body. You see her arms, they look nice. They're huge. They're bigger than mine. By virtue of the fact that you've had testosterone running through your body for 51 years now, it means...

Let's see how big her biceps are. I think that's going to be telling. Let's see. big her biceps are. I think that's going to be telling. Let's see. How many inches? How big are Rhonda Rousey's biceps? It's not a smack on her or anything.

I'm not personally offended or anything. No, I know, but someone out there will think it. I understand. I thought you were addressing me at first no no no it's just it wouldn't it's not feasible it would be hard for most fit men to reach into the sunroof of a humvee and pull another limp man out and then once he's out you don't just leave him on top of the Humvee and go, all right, well, get yourself over there. You have to throw him over your shoulder, walk him to safety. That's just not feasible for someone that small.

She just, I, she's so big. Like, whenever I see her in a dress or something, I'm just like, oh, my God, she's like a sausage in there. She's strong all over. She's very short. Yeah, I think if you were standing next to her for scale, you'd see how much bigger you were than her. She is 5'7", 135 pounds,

34A bra size. She wears a women's size 9 shoe. Her dress size is a 4. Very small. Her body measurements are 34, 25, 34. She has a 25 inch waist woody like come on i she's just not strong enough she's if you cram her frame full of muscle she's still not a man she's i i want to know what her what her arm measurements are

even that wouldn't matter as much because that's not like a direct equivalency to male yeah but i can compare it to myself like i could be like ah my biceps are 16 inches and hers are only 14 or something like like i don't know what you're saying yeah but it looks bigger because you're not on her they look on her it looks like she's vin diesel coming out of pitch black or something with huge biceps. But maybe her arms are really just tiny. Maybe they're just ripped for her frame. Maybe they would look normal on me.

They'd look really short on you. They'd look really short. My arms are fucking long. Yeah, I mean, in terms of perfect female body, this isn't my version of it. She's a little strong and stout and thick compared to, like... But when it comes to being a Marine, this is about as good as girls get. And I think she'd be the exception. Maybe.

We'll have to organize a challenge. Have her go through a course. Oh, here you go Rhonda Rousey's biceps are 12 inches I have no idea how big my body is very very small how big are yours 30 I don't know I don't have a yeah I'm afraid does anyone actually know what is I bet mine are somewhere in that range Let me see if I've got a measuring towel I used to have one

I don't have big biceps somebody look up if I'm supposed to flex while I measure or not because that's of course yeah I'm pretty I've seen it done before Huh, so you guys have one? I huh you guys I you need one of those fabric tape things right I'm sure my mom has them so how you doing Taylor doing good yeah trying to look up average bicep sizes get some some science down oh they both disappeared I was doing research and they're gone. Oh, are they actually both going to get measuring? Yeah. Yeah, and you are supposed to flex.

I have not lifted a weight since paintball and my biceps are 15 inches. No, you are supposed to flex, Kyle. About 15 and a half then. Yeah, it's... Let it's see or the picture on like wiki how the guys flexing so I assume yeah and it would be hard for you to pull a guy out of a Humvee very hard I I don't think I could Ronda Rousey's biceps are this big. You can't fold it over.

You shrunk them. You got to tuck it down. Let me find it on my arm. Let me go flaccid. All right. There you go. Ronda Rousey's bicep is the same as my forearm. My forearm is 12 inches.

In fairness, that's his masturbation arm. Yeah. This is lefty. It's like a brick shithouse. I can't flex properly there's just there's just no way that like i mean i'm sure her muscles are more dense than mine and like each inch of muscle is more effective but not by 33 percent you could beat her in arm wrestling no probably not i don't think that okay i don't know or leverage and you know i don't know you got a longer arm i imagine you'd be on top and it's like on her yeah my i bet her arms only like this on the other i just feel like she'd do

something clever like she'd just even if she's never done it before all her judo and mma experience would make her would somehow translate a little bit into arm wrestling technique maybe i'm blowing her i would be surprised yeah she she i i certainly wouldn't uh i would be afraid to bet on myself arm wrestling ronda rousey she's probably stronger at that exercise than me it just seems like it's something she does a lot with the grappling and stuff but her grip is probably insane yeah so thing i just but she's there's just not she's a she's she's a real specimen but she's just not she's a she's a girl so she wasn't seen her throw like average dudes like that were just going in there to see how they would face up i think they were like a reporter or something and she just she like hurt him knocked him over knocked the breath out of him you know

what in an instant i've seen her do that too right but i've only seen her do it against reporters who kind of took it as a joke like you know i'm in here don't hurt me etc etc then she grabs them and flips them and and they don't get up for some extended period of time. I would like to see her go up against a guy who's untrained but trying. Or at least play trying or something. These guys are acting injured. Guys getting a little bit low, making her work for it. These guys are standing up and she's not throwing them.

She's not like the Hulk, grabbing them and like, and manipulating their body weight. She uses their own body weight to write. Yeah. I remember, I think the first day I met Jolo's on, I rolled with him in the octagon. He had his way with me, but I was trying, you know, I kept pummeling for grips.

I kept doing this. He had a, it turns out, I learned later, he had a particular throw that he wanted to land on me, but he had to change his plan because I was trying. I'd like to see an average person go in there against Ronda and just give it a go. You know, it doesn't even have to be, I'm not looking for punches thrown. Just at least defend the takedown. Don't be a dummy.

Don't be like, don't be a person. Line it up. I'll fight her. Get some wicked i would be afraid of offending her in some way during the fight because it's not a real fight until she decides it is right yeah yeah i remember um joe lozan's brother his name's danny and uh i rolled with him and beforehand i was like you know that that this is just exercise, right? He's like, yeah, yeah, I won't hurt you. He hurt me.

It sucked. It was awful. Like I've just had friends that were like black belts in karate. Like, let me show you something. And what they did fucking hurt. It's like, dude, oh, I can't just, you know, and I wanted to really show you. Danny got full mount on me.

And then I guess when you usually have mount on a guy, you, like, look for an arm or a submission or whatever. He came down like this, but with his elbows, like, next to my head and elbowed me here. And, oh, my God, it was like a tennis, like half a tennis ball was swollen out of it like even like there's ufc fighters all training there and shit and they're like oh wow that you better ice that are you okay and then the fact that they're like that is like this better this is not an

everyday thing around here like can danny fuck me up we could just take advantage of you. He could have done anything he wanted to me. Is that an invitation? It really doesn't matter if he's invited or not in this scenario. I like Danny. I'm glad he likes me. Because if he didn't, anything could happen.

Fuck you. He could. He could. Dude, Danny Danny's bad motherfucker uh Joe's told us a couple stories about it's uh dude yeah I like the the family function fights that they get into like do you remember uh everyone here knows this. I tend to retell things. But in Fast Forward, Danny was acting like a bit of a jackass. Joe's father was like, get him, Joe. And they, like, go into the house, put mouth guards and MMA garb on,

and fight, like, in the backyard. Yeah. And Joe had one rule. He's like, we're going to do this one time, once. And after that, you know, we stop. And Joe had one rule. He's like, we're going to do this one time, once. And after that, you know, we stop. And Joe beat him. And then Danny kept acting a fool and kept saying, you know, that one didn't count, etc. And Joe was like, look, I told you once, once, that's it. And then Joe's dad is like, get him again. Get him again. And he did. Get him until he learns.

Yeah. And then that time, one would presume that Danny realized. And oh, oh, when there was a thing, too. I guess Joe had fought just recently. So he was like a week out of his fight. He was in fight shape and ready to go. And Danny was not. So Joe had that time. It was maybe more lopsided than it would be on a random

day. But Joe got him good twice. Twice? They never fought again? I can't. I don't know. I'm sure they did. Yeah, they're brothers. They train together. So, you know, sometimes.

And, you know, they must know who's who. I don't know. I don't know. That's cool, though. Yeah, Joe speaks really highly of Danny as if Danny might win. But Joe's had a much better career. And I talked to people Joe trains with, and they said Joe would win. So I don't know what to make of it.

Well, Joe's quite a bit older right? I'm just not sure how much older. I could look it up. At least three or four years. Which not as far as like oh he's in better shape necessarily just he's got a lot more experience I would think. Especially because he's actually been in. Actually I don't know anything

about his brother. I don't know if he's been in like UFC. Four years. 31 and 27. And, yeah, 31 and 27. So he's older. I think once you get to a certain point, experience as much as you can experience and natural talent and abilities that...

Natural ability is more of a dominant factor than yeah that's before i met joe and specifically i went to watch joe fight in japan and um uh during that time especially like in japan some of the people that regularly came with him didn't. So I was closer to the fight. I hung out with him all trip long. And I was there during the weight cut process and the whole thing. Anyway, because of that, I saw him in his underwear a lot. Nice. Yeah. I have not seen his cock, for those of you wondering.

I'll work on it. But I saw him in his underwear a lot. Now, when I became a fan of his, I'd only seen him on TV, and I thought that he was like the super version of me. Like I was a pretty good athlete at one time. It was like hypothetically, if you had devoted all your efforts into going the athletic route and turning yourself into the super you, etc.,

you'd be Joe Lozon. I was pretty athletic, so what would I have been had I focused on that instead of IT? And I thought the answer was Joe. But now that I've seen him in his underwear so much, no.

Keep stressing that point uh he's he's a professional athlete he's not like us he uh he is at a stage that I think that most people would just can't get to yeah and uh and I was almost disappointed like you know it was like yeah because he's a he was a he has a comp sci major i don't know if you knew that he has a four-year degree in comp sci and um you know it was like yeah he's like me but i went towards the comp sci and he went towards the athletes and whatever uh but when you see him up close and in person and stuff you realize he's not yeah i was just yep, I couldn't be that. Yeah, he just never liked that. These pro football players, man, some of them look like action figures.

Yeah. Yeah, they're crazy fit. The wide receivers in particular impress me. And even some of the big linemen who don't look like the chiseled action figure. You see them walking around around normal people, and they've got that big belly. But their arms, they look like, remember when the cave troll in Lord of the Rings burst through that door? It's just not in good shape, but a hulking behemoth. That's what those guys look like, just arms hanging down, the size of your fucking head.

It's ludicrous. And you think maybe some aspect of athletics you can beat them. And then you realize that they can run faster than you as well. Even though they're wearing like a pregnancy belt. There was some documentary, I think it's on Netflix about Bo Jackson. I don't know if you guys have seen that, but just talked about his

natural talents of just naturally dominating. Standing. He didn't spend a lot of time. He was standing above his thighs in water and from that position, standing thigh deep in water, he did a standing backflip. Just little stuff like that.

Like jumping over cars and throwing rocks so hard. They would have crab apple fights in his neighborhood as kids. All the other kids were afraid of this guy because he can throw the fucking crab apple so goddamn hard. He's the best at at football he's the best at baseball they interview his baseball coach he's like yeah he hit one one time went over that and one time that went over that no one's ever done that again like no the things he did were incredible he played nfl

football as a hobby like like you can't you can't come close to that's literally what he said he's like yeah the nfl season's gonna be good i ain't got a little hobby here or whatever like like baseball was his passion and uh i always thought it was the other no maybe i'm not sure i'm not sure i may i may he wanted it was baseball that he went because he turned down an nfl contract to go play baseball for for like a third of the money or something. So what happened with that, if I remember correctly, it was something like an NFL team purposefully allowed him to break NCAA rules by coming to their school and visiting.

They told him it was all okay. And they did it on purpose so that he'd get kicked, so he wouldn't be able to finish the season of college baseball even though he was on some ridiculous hot streak and going to set a record or something like that, they said. So because he wasn't able to finish the season in baseball, they said he cried when he found out. Because he couldn't finish that season of college baseball,

he said, it was the Buccaneers, I think. The Buccaneers had the first round draft pick. They picked Bo Jackson. He's like, maybe it wasn't first round. They picked Bo Jackson. He was like, no, fuck you. I'm not coming there to play and just didn't just didn't go and went to play baseball for

Kansas City and football for the Raiders if I remember correctly he was an incredible athlete that if you want to see a really really good ESPN thing you know it's You Don't Know Bo yeah I watched that on Netflix maybe cry it's it's you don't know both yeah I watched that on Netflix maybe cry for 30s it's it's maybe it dude I don't remember if it's part of that I don't know if it's

either but if it says 30 for 30 in my experience so far I think it was it's good 100 of the time those things are so well done did you see Netflix is raising their price by a dollar a dollar a dollar 9.99 but it's99 but it's only for new subscribers though like it's grandfathered in the old price oh that's very nice i'm fine with that it seems like they are definitely stepping their game up with the the tentpole series things like daredevil all the marvel stuff and i love that it's all released at once so you can binge watch the whole course of course the only way to watch. Netflix stock went up 6% today on the announcement.

Wow. That's a lot for one day. How many new subscribers are they getting in a month? I don't even know. I don't know. I feel like though it's still spreading. Everyone's going to have Netflix at some point. The only one that competes with it in my head is Amazon Prime.

It's been out for so long it seems like they should have saturated the market by now. Hulu has commercials, and fuck Hulu. It does. It's like a different TV, though. You get a lot better, newer TV out of Hulu than you do out of Netflix. Yeah, so I've got Hulu Plus now. I think it's costing me $7 a month or something like that, and I got it strictly for South Park originally.

But then I started seeing all the other stuff that was on there. You're getting South Park and Family Guy and The Simpsons as soon as it comes out, but you're also getting all of Seinfeld, and that has some value to me. I watched all that stuff. Can't you watch South Park just on Comedy Central's website, though? They changed that. Oh, they did. But TBS, when they would show the Seinfeld reruns, in case you don't know,

they speed them up by like 5% or something like that so they can slip in more commercial breaks. I did hear that. Yeah. So if you want to see Seinfeld the way it's meant to be seen and see the little, you know, as the credits are rolling at the end, there's always another little scene there where they get, you know, a couple more jokes in.

If you want that, like, it's worth it. You know, seven bucks a month. And I've been watching Seinfeld the last couple days, just letting it roll. Have you watched Seinfeld interviews lately? He's a douche. Like with Jerry Seinfeld? I haven't watched him.

I've heard that he got in, not hot water, but he said something that people didn't care for. I liked his acceptance speech the other night. I thought that was really funny. Was that the one about how great he was? Comedians can do this. It's hard. We're special.

All these actors are dumb. I feel like you took it the wrong way. It was very tongue-in-cheek. Was he being sarcastic? Yeah, yeah. His whole thing up there was like, awards are stupid. This whole thing is stupid. We all just showed up here and put on a big show just to kiss each other's asses.

Like, this is stupid. This whole thing is dumb. I felt like he was making fun of the award to begin. And, you know, there was a couple more comics on stage. He's like, you see Chris Rock? And then whoever the other guy was, he's like, they don't want to be here. We're here because HBO took care of us and blah, blah, blah. He was just honest, I i liked it i've watched some of his like driving in cars or coffee or whatever with comedians and he's a douche right it's always the other guy that's

interesting not seinfeld i mean he said he said some funny stuff and some of the ones i've seen i just don't like his stand-up comedy that much. Seinfeld is arguably the best show, comedy series of all time, but his stand-up just does not resonate with me. Have you watched a full set? From the old... Yeah, well, you've got to think. His best comedy sets, I think, were late 80s, early early 90s when all that observational humor was kind of new.

I mean, there were people doing it, but he had a whole fresh take on it. It might have just been played out. I think it's just played out. You know, he's not a 21st century comic, not a 21st century stand up comic, maybe, but he's made so much goddamn money. I don't think he gives a shit. I find that inch so I know he was executive producer and star and all that stuff of his show I think he was I guess he wrote some yeah he was based on his comedy he

wasn't the one coming up with the like the the episodes that the funny story arcs and that stuff there There's a female writer. She was responsible for a lot of that. Not Larry. Larry David did the most of it, right? What I was saying was, I know that he wasn't just an actor, but he is so wealthy

that that aspect of him has become interesting to me. Like, what did he get? $100 million for the Hulu deal? Does that sound right? It was something stupid huge. I don't know. aspect of him has become interesting to me like i think what do you get a hundred million dollars for the hulu deal does that sound right it was something stupid huge i don't know i think he's right a billion he's worth a billion you think right at it oh uh it was 800 million like a year or two ago we looked this up a while ago and he was he's richer than any other comedian he's like richard and beyonce or jZ. Yeah. This guy's threatening billionaire status. And I find

that, like, even though I don't think Seinfeld's particularly interesting, and if you, his comedy's not particularly good, and if you listen to him interviewed, you'll say, this guy's kind of a douche. You wouldn't want to know him or be his friend or anything. But he's nearly a billionaire.

And that is rare he definitely sold himself well he'd be his friend is a billionaire I'd be friends with any billionaire hey I just got back from my black rhino hunting trip got the last of them high five up here you want to go make fun of orphans later again absolutely can we spit on them can we spit on them yeah that's funny i heard that minecraft dude is like lonely and was complaining on twitter or something that money's not everything and i i don't know like real friends and relationships and blah, blah, blah. Yeah. We talked about that on the survival trip, PKA. And there were different opinions on who gave a shit.

Some people would be like, dude, you've got so much money, you have no sympathy. And I get that, right? And I said this before. Most people, every single day, struggle to get more money. Right? That's it. They need money. They need their stuff.

They need their pay, their bills, et cetera. They're not meeting the lifestyle that they wish they had, et cetera. But he got divorced, you know, over that thing, and I think that's usually a really rough process for people. The worst part would be not knowing who to trust. Who's there because they like you who's there because they want to take part in this billion dollars or whatever

I mean heck haven't you had some taste of that on YouTube oh yeah definitely like people that'll be like oh hey you know like try to be buddy buddy and oh here will you do this for me like almost immediately type thing and you can tell who's genuinely interested in

hanging out with you as a person and who's eventually interested just because they want you to promote them you can hardly tell like sometimes it's the long con you know like yeah i like those hard ones and uh you know that that's a thing and I imagine Notch gets that 100 times more than someone like us would. I could see why he'd be unhappy even though he's rich. All his ex-co-workers hate him. That was part of the tweet. He's like, I worked so hard to make sure they'd get taken care of, and now they all hate me.

Why do they hate him? What did he do? My guess is that... He sold his company to Microsoft. Yeah. Notch became a billionaire, and the rest of them are still working for a living. I'm guessing that's their complaint. These billionaires are all so stupid if you ask me.

If you gave me a billion dollars, I'd just fucking leave. I'd get that money somewhere where you can't tax me anymore, Uncle Sam. And I'd fucking go wherever I wanted to. I'd jet set forever. And I wouldn't be worried about those people who used to work at my office. I'd be making new friends every single week in a different continent and we'd be

killing it on the town. Like, on my yacht, now on my plane, now on my yacht plane that I had built. The SS Minecraft money. Yeah, SS Minecraft fucking money. It'd be 500 feet long. It'd be a replica of the fucking Titanic. Because I can. I'm a billionaire. I don't know what this guy's problem is. He has no imagination.

I think, well, he was talking about going to Belize or whatever and partying with movie stars. Why would you party with a movie star? I don't know anybody else taking the shine away from my billion dollars. I'm going to be the most famous person at my billion dollar party i think the fun part would definitely wouldn't be hard to do it's the the core aspects of life a lot of people take for granted of just being able to find someone and trust people nah fuck all that i'd hire myself a i'd have hire myself a director of fun that's what this dude's fucking job would be and his old job would have been something like running a nightclub or like a travel sort of thing and he was like hooking people up with cool trips and his whole job

would be to find cool shit for me to do next month and my whole job would be to do cool shit this month and just keep going until i was forever yes forever yeah i would want to start living like by proxy through people but like keep it on the down low like i wouldn't publicize it like i took this homeless person and i raised him up to be a star i would do it on the down low i'd pick someone who i thought like like the craziest of the crazy out there that i thought was still redeemable build him up on the down low first First, it's a viral video. Who knows how that came about? Maybe my billion dollars helped. Next thing you know, he's on Ellen. Everybody's

laughing at his jokes. This guy's really relatable. He's likable. I like trash can Steve. Up the echelon. Up higher and higher until eventually when he gets his first Emmy or something, I can come out and be like, you bunch of fucking idiots. It was me all along.

I am the grandmaster puppeteer behind this. This is what I can do. Look how powerful I am. Both of you people are really good at being rich. I don't know what I'd do different at all. Just pull up roots. There's no reason to be in

any spot. If you have a billion, it's incredibly hard to spend that billion spot if you have a billion and it's an incredibly hard to spend that billion unless you're buying like you know hundred million dollar things at a time calculating and it was like some oh some amount of money a day like hundred some thousand dollars a day for it was 60 years or something i'm a big fan of that website vrbo the vacation rentals by owner.com where you can get yourself into a $2 million house for $2 grand a night. And maybe you and a dozen friends have a bash there over a three-day weekend or something

like that. And for $15,000, it comes out not that bad to get a mansion for the weekend or whatever. Well, if you've got a billion, then all of a sudden, you can have a mansion everywhere you stop. No matter where you are, you can be like, all right, that's my Tennessee mansion, Georgia mansion, South Carolina mansion. Wherever you are, you're going to be in a mansion. You're going to be driving a supercar. You're going to have any number of gorgeous, perfect women.

We always talk about how we hang these movie stars too highly, where they're women just as beautiful, if not more so, at every college. You can have five of those. We all saw that viral video where the guy's got the Bugatti or whatever and he's just asking hot women as they walk by, hey, you want to go to a hotel and have sex with me right now?

And a lot of them do. A lot of them do. Not just that they're crying in that big stupid hat of his about not having any friends. What he should be crying about is not having any creativity or imagination. Like, he might have made that amazing game that made all that money,

but he sure as hell can't plan a Friday night or he wouldn't be bitching on Twitter. I wouldn't even have a Twitter account. But, I mean, you can't party like every single day. You need a Twitter account to gather crowds. I create my own social media and it would be fucking like not Twitter whatever Ford right now to party every day if you wanted to but you don't do you party every single day if I could have right now you can not every day

there's not to the level I want to certainly like I don't think you know what a good party is like just getting just getting bottle service at a New York nightclub is going to cost you $1,000 just for the bottle and some mixers and shit. Okay, so partying every night, we're talking about spending $100,000 every night you go out to party. You've got a massive entourage. You've taken over every place you go to. You go to a nightclub, that's your nightclub. You go to a strip club, that's your strip club. Everybody else is going to want to leave because you're

shining so fucking bright. You're going to have every stripper in there on you. You're going to have every girl at the club on you. Your DJ is going to take over. You're going to be right in the music. That's what it's like to have a billion dollars if you've got a little creativity and a staff.

The guy doesn't know what he's doing remember how i said that kyle was a fountain of video ideas and he comes up with like this extends to other areas too i'm learning kyle is a fountain kyle you should be notch's director of fun you could do that not you make me director fun and every month we're gonna be in a different country at least every month and really every weekend It's gonna be a whole new party with whole new bitches pussy on every continent that you ever fucked You ever fucked a blue-eyed Malaysian chick you will my friend Nine of them out there, and they're all at this party

I'll get you a blonde Chinese chick To lick your asshole give you a rusty trombone while we play Minecraft together wearing that Oculus Rift thing. You've got the money to make it happen, bro. I would do fun stuff. I'd want to hire people who used to be famous, but now they're past their prime and they're desperate. Corey Feldman. I'd make them subjugate themselves. I'd get all the NSYNC guys except for Justin Timberlake and like make them walk around with me like hey

You know I don't even remember their names like hey Nick. This is Lance Bass. He's my bitch now ain't that right Lance? Tell him you're my bitch. BAH! Slap him in the face. Like I'd be such an asshole like you know You could slap Lance Bass right in the face if you had a billion dollars. You should do that with X Fighters right? Like like this is uh Chuck Liddell? James T- well chuck liddell still has money you don't don't hit him but um yeah like james tony or something brain injury he has he probably doesn't know he has that money just tell him different yeah there you go hello people that really are desperate like

kuba gooding jr that guy is taking my orders at restaurants he's doing everything for me i like purposefully drop things oh kuba pick that up i'm way over here you're kuba i didn't ask questions oh you want to go back and you want to go sit with the rest of your radio money oh i forgot that ran out yeah yeah i saw snow dogs pick that shit up, bitch. Wow. Do your radio character all the rest of the day. Like, minor league celebrities who are washed up and stuff, and I would pay them enough money to make them do a porno. There's so many things I would do if I had a billion dollars.

Like, definitely get your own island and do crazy shit on it, right? I've always wanted to have real-life gladiatorial games on some continent, some country where I could, you know, you go into one of these little micro-countries, you prop up the government with a hundred... You know what? They said that 150 million that were given to Iran... It's 150 billion were given to Iran with that whole nuclear deal.

They said that equated to like five to six trillion in their economy. Can I interrupt? Yeah. I'm told we're not actually giving them money. We're lifting sanctions. It's worth that much to them. Fair enough. But if the conversion rate is $150-5-6 trillion, I bet you go to some country that's even worse

off than Iran. You could prop that government up, get my gladiatorial game started. All of a sudden, I'm live streaming fights to the death every Friday night. Now I'm worth two billion. I'd find out about African scythe over there. When you get to two billion, there are

people getting fucked to death at your parties. It's just madness. If I ever get a billion dollars, I'm going to go to Kyle's house and we're going to just have about a month of brainstorming. Coming up with nonsense and wacky things that'll really be upsetting to a lot of people. Yeah, this is quite the bucket list We're gonna pay the Russians to go up and warn them that we're going to space we're going to the International Space Station Totally make that happen with 20 million dollars. We both fucking

Malaysians in space alright guys send your donations to woody's gamer tag at gmail.com via paypal and we will enter a golden age you hear the shit we'll do oh wow so when i hear on a global scale with a billion dollars you could like buy two shitty african countries that aren't worth anything just buy them wholesale and then make them as long as they hate each other they have little rivalries over there and then make them into one country watch it unfold or sell them sell them both to another adjacent country where it's like you know like i signed the deed i now own the people's democratic republic of the congo and now you belong to pull a ball out of one of those things up France have fun France

taking care of this like that'd be great that's yeah no that would be awful that would actually be a terrible like if you're a billionaire and your wife passes away or something like that okay you can't buy that back I'll allow him some sadness temporary yeah I'll allow you some sadness but if you tell me

you ain't got any friends then you're not good at making friends alright cause cause most of us can make temporary. Yeah, I like some sadness. But if you tell me you ain't got no friends, then you're not good at making friends, alright? Because most of us can make friends with a normal fucking income, or no money at all, just because we're decent people. You're such a turn off to people that you can't make friends with a billion dollars. Come on. But you don't see that

the billion dollars is a barrier to making true friendships. Why does he go, where is he looking for friends? At MineCon? Like, what the fuck? He's's not that recognizable go out into public and grown-ass adults don't know who the hell his shave his fucking beard that's true he's not like a outside of the gaming community I have my mom trainer my chef and personal trainer always with me keeping me healthy keeping me in shape i got my steroid guy gearing me up making me strong and hard fucking core i'd have a whole staff of people who's who would each have a little job that would make sure that i was always happy and taken care

of and had all the things that i want every day all day no matter where we are in it and where the end tour the world doing crazy cool shit i want to go out there and hang out with some of those Saudi princes when they get those Land Rovers up on two wheels going like 100 kilometers per hour out through the desert, and they'll crawl out and sit on the hood. Those guys are having a ball. They're not fucking around. Not a single trouble in their world.

Yeah, those people are good at being rich. They like cheetahs and their Lambos. Yeah. That'd be so sweet to have a whole staff. Would you want a jester? Like a real stand-up comedian like Bill Burr, who you may dress up like a jester, and he just accompanies you around to places to amuse you?

I wouldn't do that, but you can get celebrities like that, especially ones who put on performances like music stars and comedians. You can pay them to come do a a your gig for you like like a lot of play your party yeah Miley Cyrus will come to your house and play your party for a hundred thousand she put on a concert for I bet for 250 she'll suck your dick Miley Cyrus would suck my dick if I had a billion dollars I guarantee it you know what I don't doubt it. She might do it anyway. I don't know about that.

Everybody always gave Miley a ton of grief when her butt didn't look good in that spandex thing back when she was Robin Thicke. It wasn't a flattering garb. I think she's very hot. I like Miley Cyrus a lot. I think she's

pretty. I don't think she's Hollywood hot. I like Miley Cyrus a lot. Yeah. I'd give Miley Cyrus. I think she's pretty. I don't think she's Hollywood hot. She was on SNL just recently, and I was watching her. I was sort of looking at her. She's a little thick, and she looks southern, if I could describe that. Some sort of cherry pudgy thing going on there. And just, I mean, she's pretty. But I just, in terms of like Hollywood and singers and stuff,

a peak Christina Aguilera, way hotter. Peak Madonna, way hotter. Britney Spears, different league. Taylor Swift is way hotter. Yeah, but $250,000, she'll do anything for you. And she is. Yeah. Would you buy your way onto TV shows? Like whatever TV show is a big fan of at the time i'd be like you know what i want to be on game i

want to be a guest star yeah who's the guy who gets to kill ned stark no no that's me now yeah i would hire sean bean to come to my house and just mock it up for free i don't have to be on the show i just make sean bean come over fake cut his head off. You bring Game of Thrones to you. Yeah, yeah. I'd buy sports teams that I hated. These are things you can do. You can buy yourself a sports team. Here's what you do, though. You don't buy your favorite sports team. Like, oh yeah, I'm on the Braves now.

Isn't it great? This is for Maddox and Glavin and Smoltzworth. No. You buy the team you hate the most. And you run it into the ground. You fuck with them. You fuck with them you know the chicago blackhawks are now the tijuana buttholes first season i'd run them into the ground so bad the first season obviously we got first round draft pick next year i'd waste it so badly i'd wait and with the first selection of the draft the New York Jets pick Carrot Top

His name of the guy who's here at the names Self we go pull the Dave out and be like me No limits of what you can do I mean you can you could buy the companies you like buy the companies you hate if you've got to what you can do. I mean, you can buy the companies you like, buy the companies you hate. If you've got enough money, you can do anything you want. Or you can just be senseless and have the rest of your life. You know, they always say you can't play forever. Life isn't a big party.

Life isn't a big party. You can't live that way. It could be. It could be if you wanted to be. It could be like caligula there could be donkey fucking and and fucking orgies and and and make and fucking people's wives and and all kinds of hardcore crazy shit you the sky's the limit the sky isn't even the limit when you got a billion dollars space space space is the limit and you can go there i i don't know why the limit so whenever i see notch like boohooing about like

not have any real friends or whatever, it's like, well, you should have maybe made a real friend before you made that money first of all, but second of all, now that you got that money it's pretty easy, dude. Don't go around flashing the fact that you're a billionaire and you might meet a new person who genuinely likes you, or just don't give a fuck.

Who cares if they like you or not? Just pay them to like you and it's just the same. It's just as good. From your point of view, it's just the same it's just as good notch if you're from your point of view there's great actors out there that are willing to work for money notch if you're watching a million dollars a year for me and i'll be your senior social advisor to make it so that you you will have friends you'll have someone you don't even know what to fucking do a million dollars a year i'll help you out i do it i do it less than that but i do want to be paid in euros I think this is it we could we could make this thing happen Just travel around the world with some billionaire coming up with great ideas for them to do that be a fun job, right?

We go we go join Like some some we become mercenaries go somewhere and get into like a battle with real guns and stuff We go fight in a war, but we know we'd have a bunch of You don't want to fight in a war. You don't want to fight in a war? I would. No. If I wanted to fight in a war, I would have joined the military.

You can give a bad name to products... You can do that with a lot less than a million dollars. Uh-uh. No, you can't. So what you described is signing up for a two-year commitment where they order you around and send you wherever the fuck they want to. What I'm talking about is paying to be guided onto a battlefield, letting you do whatever you want, and then going home the next day. Or even better, going to some paradise the next day.

I'm telling you, anybody who's crying with a billion dollars is just an asshole. He's just an asshole. He'd be crying if he had no money. He's just a crybaby. No reason to cry. You got a billion dollars about anything unless you lost a loved one even if your dog dies if your dog died you could clone it you piece of shit stop crying you could like outfit isis and things that you don't like like i'd airdrop huge crates of nutella and chicago cubs gear and so every single picture of them committing an atrocity,

they've got like a Cubs hat on and a spoonful of Nutella and all the idiots on the internet would be like, Oh, I thought Nutella was a good company, but they're a system of terrorists. I would defame mustard in the same way. Yeah. I'm going to get mustard shut down as a condiment.

Send them 50,000 Tom Brady jerseys yeah like just like wings were interested don't give me that school zone bullshit don't give me that bullion billionaire crybaby bullshit cuz that's just not happening dude I mean a mill you got a million in your crying I believe you like I held with them at a million you got more problems than you had when you when you only had a hundred thousand i bet but when you get to a billion all those problems have vanished long long ago and and you're just being an asshole now and an uncreative one at that it's i mean come on you're a real piece of shit if you're complaining and you're a billionaire like i don't care what really happened like if your whole family was killed like yeah some tragic accident yeah that

that's really awful but if it's just because you don't have friends and you're gonna pull some weepy horse shit of go nobody likes me for me yeah no shit like you're probably not fun yeah by the sounds of this and people are gonna look at their twitter and be like what a douche this guy's a billion dollars and he's complaining about not having friends. Like, spend less time. Actually, I don't even know what he, I wonder what he spends his day doing, other than crying on Twitter.

Tweeting. Tweeting, yeah. Reading Twitter comments. These people, I should just buy Twitter. These people are so mean on there. I'll block them all. Shut it down. Yeah.

He's probably actually a nice guy. I'm being a dick. I met him one time at a PAX or something like that. Or an E3. I don't remember which. I didn't recognize him. I didn't know who he was or anything. Because I don't follow Minecraft at all. Especially back then. But I guess I met him one time.

I've never met him. I've been in the same room with him. But I don't think i ever spoke to him or anything he was um i didn't know what minecraft was at the time this has been about four or five years ago i guess and but but a lot of the people did and kitty kitty was like oh that's not just notch and i'm like what the fuck's a notch i don't care yeah i was a speaker at minecon and there's a there's a VIP room and stuff. And there are a lot of people that like CaptainSparklez was there and Notch was there and I don't

know who else. People were there. Oh, Skyda's Minecraft. I went and hung out with him. But I don't know Notch. Yeah, once you get that billion dollars, you can get them leather pants, get yourself a nice cocaine habit, get a couple Lambos, do whatever you want. I'm gonna get silk pants, first thing.

Some nice silk pants. What are silk pants? Can I take this? Isn't that like pajamas? Alright, so take it away. I don't really quite know what they are, where the silk is. So, I'm sure we've all worn a pair of like dress slacks like you would wear with a suit and jacket, right? And on the insides, the lining is smooth, right? It's some sort of silk rayon type material.

That's what Wings has been referring to for the last four years or whatever. Those are his silk pants. They're dress slacks and the inner lining is a smooth rayon mix or something like that. Wings doesn't have any silk pants, okay? Wings just doesn't know what slacks are. Are you sure? I've been picturing him walking around like a genie in his pants his whole time. I have seen the silk pants.

They are dress slacks. I think that I have had actual pants or pajama pants that were silk. I saw a guy that had some pants that were made out of Egyptian linen or something like that. They were white and super light and soft. Those were cool.

But Wings would always tell me they were silk pants. I didn't understand what he meant until I came here and I saw some silk pants. I've had silk boxers. Silkers if you never had those they're pretty much arousing now i had them when i was young too and it was like fuck like these boxers are too comfortable like at least a 600 increase in daily bon boners throughout the day. Yeah, like all day long. It's just like this walking feels glorious. This is getting to be a problem in high school.

I don't like them. There's no structure. It's just mayhem. Everything goes where it wants. There's no law down there. For my money, nothing beats MeUndies. MeUndies.com, folks. Made with Modal, I think, which is made from birchwood trees and is twice as soft as cotton.

Dude. It's absorbent. It's wonderful. When MeUndies advertised on the show, I was actually just wearing them for the first time. I didn't know it yet, but Jackie had a very positive response to them. You talked about how well they fit and how they took your junk and really put it on a stage.

Made your butt look good too, I'm sure. That play played out well for me. That was outstanding. MeUndies, if you're listening, send more pairs. I could always use more attention. It's thin and it's like clingy. So it really doesn't like, I don't know when you, when I wear normal boxers, you know, your bowl just kind of a bulge there.

But with this, it's like, oh, there's your dick and balls. Yeah, right there. Yeah. We left them on. She was a huge fan and it was a big win for me. Yeah. I really am a fan. I was telling Chiz before the show I was like could you get us some more yeah I want some more of those and my girlfriend wants some too because they make panties that

was like one of their selling things was that you and your girl could have matching underwear that you could get the boxer briefs or whatever and she could get the panties and I want want the panties. For her. For her. Yeah, they're a win. What did you guys have? The boxer brief, trunk, or men's brief? Boxer briefs. Boxer brief, I think, yeah.

But tonight's sponsor is Audible. Audible.com slash PKA. There is no one who comes close to them. They dominate this field and no one else has. That's absolutely true. Check them out.

You want to call the show there? I think so. It's almost 2 a.m. Four plus hours. Yes. Thank you, Wicked, for coming on. Yeah, thanks for coming, man. Thanks for having me.

That was fun. Had some laughs. I want to talk more YouTube, but I'll let it go. It's about 2 a.m. All right, good night, all. Episode 251. I hope you enjoyed it. Take it easy.

See you later.