Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #322
Episode Date: February 23, 2017This week on PKA, Hutch makes a return! The guys talk about the Nazi accusations towards PewDiePie, Trump's Press Conference and how head over heels Kyle has dived into Magic the Gathering. ...
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Live, PKA episode 322 with our guest Hutch. Kyle?
Yeah, several ads tonight. Texture, Squarespace, Movement Watches, Blue Apron, Wink again, W-I-N-C,
and we're going to talk more about Creature Quest later on in the show. There are links to all those
down in the description below, of course, if you want to check now. But yeah, let's get into it.
Got Hutch on again for the show. Lots of cool stuff in the news. Trump up there having a real
unhinged sort of
media encounter. Taylor and I
have gotten re-obsessed with Magic the
Gathering and his part and me sort of
affected by him. Yeah, I've got so many cards
upstairs. Been playing a bunch.
With Magic, it always happens where
I only get into it like every two years
because it's like a Skyrim character
building a deck where you spend so much time building a deck
until it's so powerful, it's unbeatable,
and everybody's like, I don't want to play against you.
This isn't fun.
You're like, well, fuck, I'm not doing that anymore.
But it spreads like a virus to all your friends,
at least my friends, every time I introduce it to them
because it's so addictive.
I know you played online, Magic.
Have you played the card version as well?
Fuck yeah, absolutely.
It was a big deal at the Machinima offices.
We would multiple times a week stay after at the office until 8 or 9.
And I got so obsessed with trying to build the most annoying deck
that I spent like I think $500 to $1,000
just like buying super rare land cards
that you can tap to turn into 5-5 flying creatures.
Yep.
Yeah, I pissed off a lot of coworkers, man.
It's a really fun, super addicting game.
Really fun.
Yeah, me and...
Thanks for having me on again, by the way.
Oh, yeah, we love having you on, always.
Me and Taylor and Chiz and a couple other people
went to Colorado recently on a little trip.
And Taylor brought his magic cards and he really infected us all.
And so now we're all here.
I went on eBay and bought, I think, 6,000 cards or something like that.
So I've been going through those all day, sorting them.
Building a deck is really great, man.
You know who's good at it is Sark.
He was a fucking genius when it came to building decks.
Anyway, I cut off your story.
We've been playing the Xbox game now.
I think the Xbox game is free.
It's called Magic Duels.
Magic Duels has a really, really nice
tooltip thing to build your decks.
It lets you categorize by color and keyword
and everything. But yeah, we've been playing a bunch.
The Xbox version has always been
awesome for teaching new people
because it basically makes it so you can't
play at an incorrect time.
It's annoying that you
don't have the same level of editing
that you can in your own cards.
But I still remember
years ago, this was probably like 2010,
where it was me and you, Hutch,
and then Dunkus and someone else playing four-player.
Onslaught.
And it was like Onslaught.
It was one of the last games of the night.
I love Onslaught.
And I hadn't won one of the four-player games.
And I had done some combo where I was getting like 10 more 1-1 creatures
every single turn.
And we were having connection problems.
You'd always be like,
oh, man, is the attacking struggling?
Are you struggling to attack?
And I'm like, yeah, dude,
I can't select people and attack.
And then at one point,
at one point, you're like,
oh, oh, man, that's it.
I'm gone.
Get out the draw, boys.
Get out the draw.
I was so upset when I realized
that Hutch had just quit the game.
And I didn't win the argument, of course, because Onslaught and Dunkus were laughing at me as well.
That was so annoying.
That was the worst.
And it happens a lot.
I play a lot of Monopoly now, too, on console because it's a lot of fun.
And that happens constantly with Monopoly.
It's the worst.
You'll spend literally two hours, two or three hours playing the same game, and then there's no solution because it just freezes.
we're better. And with one life left, or two, they just
quit. And then AI comes in,
and of course the AI doesn't work. And so we're like,
alright, I guess we concede the duel now. Fuck us, right?
Like, oh.
Oh, it's almost as bad as when they
milled you to death that
other game. Oh yeah,
I didn't realize that just milling one
person to death in Two-Headed Giant
was enough to win. Oh yeah.
I thought you had to mill both people to death, and so I was just know easy street with like two cards left i'm like dude they're down to
two kyle you just take it after this you got it like and then and then no so that was so wait
magic duels is on xbox now are you talking about xbox one xbox one yeah oh i didn't know they had
it on xbox now yeah previous ones it's just free yeah it's free unless you want
cards uh i'm sure it's it's one of those candy crush type games where there's some guy out there
he's like oh i own all the cards yeah yeah definitely five hundred dollars you know nothing
to you guys did you guys get into hearthstone i'm guessing you guys got into hearthstone
no i had multiple people tweet at me and be like dude you've mentioned magic before you guys got into Hearthstone. No, I had multiple people tweet at me and be like, dude, you've mentioned magic before,
you've got to get into Hearthstone. And I'm like, now I will absolutely never download Hearthstone,
because if it's anything like magic, I'll get addicted and be some idiot.
And those cards will get mixed in with my magic cards.
It's $20 of rubies that I need to buy in order to really invest in Hearthstone.
I mean, it's an investment you know I think it's way
more addicting than
magic online
in person I mean it doesn't have an in person
game so obviously magic wins in that department
but as far as online play
goes I would say the hearthstone
is more addicting because it's easier
to get into it's really easy to learn
the game you can learn it in I think
five minutes. And then
the competitive aspect
to it with the ranking system
makes it that much more addicting, especially
if you have that competitive
spirit, which I know all you guys have, too.
Is it as deep a game as
Magic? Super deep, yeah.
I mean, I don't know if it's as deep, because Magic has
literally, like, thousands and thousands
of cards, but it's really deep.
Yeah, the meta, like when you watch the pros play, you can tell that they're thinking in
terms of, they're calculating all these different variables at the same time, and it's just
way over my head.
We had, before yesterday, last night, I guess, we were all discussing what we were going
to do tonight, and we were like, oh, Magic will be a good do tonight and we're like, oh magic will be a guitar
Topic and what he was like, oh, all right, maybe maybe sometime we could play a magic game on the show It's like oh man. It's so much math and there's so many like there's so many like in poker
There's like really established sets. It's like bet check bet check raise and it just happens
But in magic there's like instant cards that can like jump in at any time
And so I can just see with like a delay in the feets boogie whoever playing with boogie It just happens. But in Magic, there's instant cards that can jump in at any time.
And so I can just see with a delay in the feeds, whoever were playing with Boogie,
they're like, no, no, no, I wanted to play this, that's horseshit, take it back, go back,
and then right in the middle of a conversation.
And there's so many exceptions. With Magic, it's almost like everything is so broken that nothing is broken.
So if you're explaining to a bunch of people, like, all alright, so you know how we established the attack phase happens now, and then we're
going to wrap that up, go to the next main phase, and then turns
over? Well, actually, I'm going to play this card, which
means that everything's different, and we have
two attack phases, and then it goes back to the beginning of my
upkeep, and it's like,
when Woody was bringing that up, I wanted to be like,
if you give me a
pass to play magic on the show,
I'm taking it i'm
taking that test honestly like i just i know that if i didn't know anything about magic if i tried
to watch two people especially not professionals like oh yeah i'd be lost they'd be like what the
fuck's going on i can't read these cards those are all red and then he has some blue like what
what's happening but also fuck is an eldrazi yeah poker oh that that happened i feel like well while i
couldn't play my best poker half paying attention i can play poker half paying attention apparently
magic's not like that and you have to really sort of not enjoy the conversation and give it your
full attention yeah it's almost like scoring a fight it's it's like you can't be eating cheetos
and like fucking around you've got to be paying attention to every move that they make because
you know if you if you look away for a second,
then the numbers on the board might not mean
what they meant a second ago. Now maybe
every number on the board is plus one, plus one,
and you didn't catch that.
The only way you're going is if you reach across the table and
like, oh yeah, so now everything...
Oh, oh no.
Or if someone wants to cast a sorcery that would
defeat some other opponent, but you know
that it would put you in a really shitty spot,
then if you're not paying attention, then you wouldn't
know to counter that.
You know the old cliche where you play strip poker
with these hot girls and they don't know the rules
so you just keep inventing them as they go along?
That's really how it feels to listen to you guys
talk about magic.
Strip magic would be compelling.
That's strip rape that you're playing.
Those are lies.
I've never really played strip poker with anybody, legit or not.
But that's the thing.
Like, oh, no, no.
In this situation, a pair of nines beats tens because mine are red and yours are black, which somehow seems racist.
If poker was more like magic, it would be like, oh, I'm going to play this two of hearts to destroy your king of diamonds
and take control of your jack of spades.
Be like, what? What's happened?
Did he win this hand now?
No, he couldn't do that.
But yeah, you never need to ask them,
like, what does the jack of hearts do?
Well, the same thing that all the other ones do.
Just a jack.
I think that's what this has done
now that we've all got this weird little
passion in common or addiction, whatever it is. I want to go
to some... Chiz keeps talking about
the Friday Night Magic at
the local stores and stuff, at comic book stores.
I really don't want to do that. I don't think
I want to play against random people. I would like to
go to... You're looking at me like that's the best,
the most fun part. You might be
fun, man. Or you might have fun with it.
I like the idea of us going
together to
like a magic tournament somewhere and like like going to some big open tournament and what i'm
hearing is fighting a pack's magic style yeah i was just about to say i know that packs has a
room that they designate for um what do you call it uh tabletop games and a lot of the times people
people will be downstairs at packs playing playing Magic with each other and doing
tournaments the whole time.
Yeah, that'd be really fun.
And Kitty, because Kitty was talking about playing
tournaments back in the day, and
I guess once you would win, you'd win all these
booster boxes. And of course, right now, booster
boxes sound better to me than money.
So it's like, oh really? How many cards did they give you?
Dude, the booster box thing?
If you don't know what a booster box is, it's 36 booster packs with random cards where you're guaranteed at least one rare
like most trading card games we all know what booster boxes are exact talking to people who
do this thing where they're like i just get booster boxes from tournaments and then i sell
all the cards i don't want online and i end up turning a profit every time works guaranteed
those are the exact same people who are always up when gambling yeah it's like no you're not you either don't have or stocks and
you're taking huge amounts of time to list individual cards from every fucking thing and
shipping them all out like you're a fedex office or you're just fibbing and you just wanted to buy
extra cards like that nobody makes money doing that unless you buy like i don't know 100 boxes
and you have a couple people working for you the easiest way the easiest way to figure out if someone's a phony when it comes to gambling is
just to ask them like how what's your hourly rate like how much do you make per hour because the
good gamblers will do those calculations and tell you this is i make 20 30 40 an hour whatever
uh but the people that always say that they're mostly up or they're a profitable player they
don't keep records so how the fuck would they know if you're not keeping or they're a profitable player, they don't keep records. So how the fuck would they know? If you're not keeping
records, chances are you're not
a dedicated player and you don't really know what you're doing.
If you're selling Magic the Gathering
cards for a living, maybe you're
not the most organized individual to begin
with, right?
If you've taken up this mantle as your...
You'd have to be selling a lot of cards to turn a profit.
You'd have to be running a store.
Because I look online as I sift through my thousands of cards.
I'll be like, ah, let's Google this and see what this is.
Two cents.
Two cents.
You're never going to turn a profit buying these one at a time.
That's never going to happen.
And it's not like nobody's trying to sell.
Have you seen the video where the guy was unboxing a random booster pack
and he found the most rare card in
magic it was like the black black lotus or something like that what's it called yeah
i've seen the video and it's it's worth like 20 grand or some stupid shit like some of those
cards are worth a lot of money if you've got the power nine which is like black lotus and then all
four of the mox's or five of the mox uh gems or whatever the fuck like all nine of those cards together are
like 30 grand like something bananas and if you go to those like gen con or packs there's always
at least a few people out with like binders from 1994 and they just invite people to look through
it and they'll be like oh yeah you see that page that's 40 000 in that page and it's not like
bullshit where it's like they like you can slide the cards out
it's like they take these binders out of the back of a
fucking Brinks truck out front
and then they pull them in in a safe
and then do it and bring it out
this reminds me of those rappers who show up with a club
with like $200,000 worth of necklaces
and some guy finally goes
YANK! and just runs
isn't that what's coming?
like if you're bringing out
forty thousand dollars worth of paper at a mat at like a at a random thing like isn't somebody
like tempted to just take your cards most people at those events aren't very quick so they're not
you'd be like somebody stole my magic cards well aren't you worried well he's he's still running
that's him he hasn't made made his door yet. We'll smell
him if he hides. Right, it's like a trail.
He's a snail running away, right? Both in speed
and in terms of the ability to
follow him.
I used to
go to this casino
in Sonoma County
and they had a high roller game
in poker and so you'd routinely
see people walking in with little duffel bags with just bricks of cash.
So they would walk in there sometimes
with $75,000 in cash.
There was this old guy, too,
that won a jackpot for like 20 grand
at one of the slot machines.
He got it, goes out to his car,
and someone beat the fuck out of him.
He ended up in an intensive care unit
in the parking lot of the casino,
which is stupid as fuck because there's cameras everywhere.
They got caught in like two days or something.
Do you know if they got the money back?
I don't know who's liable in that.
Is the casino liable in that?
I would hope the mugger still had it.
That'd be nice.
Oftentimes when people steal that much money,
they're going to burn through 25% of it
that night or something.
Yeah.
I wouldn't expect wise investment decisions
from too many muggers.
We follow the paper trail.
He invested in index funds.
I'm sorry!
Are we still on Magic Talk? I'm confused. I'm always on Magic Talk?
I'm confused.
I'm always on Magic Talk.
I think someone's going to have to hold it.
From magic to hockey, back to magic to hockey,
just people will love it.
No fucking hockey.
The Blues are slipping anyway.
Let's talk about Trump.
They're on a five-game win streak.
Ah, that's pathetic.
It's it?
That's it.
You assholes. kyle go ahead with with your
non-hockey talk about trump and maybe you guys could educate me because i took a little nap
i woke up about 45 minutes ago or so so i'd be nice and energized and so i think i missed the
doings of the day the happenings of the day with trump apparently just to phil hutchin i have been
fighting these guys 1v2 for a year now, and I'm glad you're here.
But there's no way.
I'm so curious.
Okay, Mirka, you're not an enthusiastic Trump supporter from what I surmise, but you still found him to be a better alternative than Hillary.
And then Kyle, I don't get the impression that you're all that enthusiastic either, right?
He went to the rally.
I wanted to see what the deal was.
I almost went to a rally.
I didn't go to the rally dressed up like screaming, like build the rock.
I wasn't dressed as Uncle Sam with a hood on or anything.
I almost went to a rally.
There was one really close to me.
I almost went to a rally too.
You want to see what it's all about.
I wanted to see it too for the same reason.
It seems like it would be a spectacle.
I never considered it.
I'm not ever going to a rally.
Fuck that.
It's free.
It's free and It's free.
And quite the show.
It's like the only one you want to go to are the ones that are paying to get into.
Like, that's my issue with it.
I've paid my way into, like, many things.
Sort of like comedy shows or improv or whatever.
Actually, yeah, improv would cost money, too.
Yeah.
I've never went to something that was free and yet this entertaining.
This was better than a lot of movies that I've seen i'm happy i went to that that rally but yeah
i'm kind of the same boat as taylor um i i it's it's been really entertaining to watch the trump
show and i did find him to be the better option i still do than clinton um i think there's no way
to know right like maybe maybe if hillary got rid of our sort war, we'd have accidentally bombed some Russian commandos or something.
Who knows? There's no way to know.
I mean, I find that argument pretty weak to say that...
She had hashed out positions that you could see on her website.
You know, Trump didn't.
I find it kind of odd to say that a vote for Trump is a vote for peace,
which is literally a line that was spoon-fed to the media from an official in the Kremlin.
But I find that a bit disingenuous when in the first month of the term, we have major conflicts with Iran, China, Mexico, Australia.
I mean, not major, obviously, with Mexico and Australia, but he's alienating our allies that are on this side of the world.
And then he's also provoking some pretty big powers over there too.
So, and his diplomatic relations right now are just like not great at all.
So if the whole argument was that she was going to start World War III, I find where
we're at now to be a much more unstable and volatile
geopolitical sphere than we were
before and I really doubt
that Hillary Clinton would be
I don't know who we're going to go to war with
I see it almost like it depends on what side you're on
because it's like
what you're seeing right now
because if you were one of those
rah-rah shish-boom-bah Trump people
and you're watching what he's doing
for the most part he's doing what he said he was going to do.
Even if you don't like the rollout and all that shit,
he said he was going to enact a restriction on immigration from some countries.
He's going to try and push the wall stuff through.
He's going to apparently backpedal and allow a Republican Congress
to do fucking nothing about Obamacare, which is annoying,
that they're just completely dropping the ball and not doing anything there.
But then obviously
if you don't like those things what can they do the republican congress yeah i mean what can they
do what can they do about obamacare you can't they fought it like six or seven times when obama was
in office and then they haven't done shit about it since trump got in like i'm blaming them not
giving them credit for something yeah yeah yeah but yeah i mean i'm just saying like if they had
a better alternative you've heard it a thousand times if they had a better alternative we would
have seen it by now yeah sure i just see with like with all like the the foreign policy stuff
and the immigration stuff it just it seems like people who really were against that prior to it
they see this now it's like oh my god this is the the end of days it's finally come and the people
who saw that and we're like yeah we do want more immigration control we do want the borders secure they see this and they go okay we may not like the way you rolled it out but
at least he's doing or trying to do what he said he seems to have a habit of you know i mean he did
write a book about it about negotiating and starting with like a really ridiculous thing
so this whole like the full seven country ban it it seems like he's going to back off of that.
And then all the people who were like, yeah, we love Trump.
We want no more immigration.
They'll be like, well, he tried to do that for us.
But, you know, the rest of the government had to pull him back.
And then the people who hated that whole idea of the temporary ban from those seven nations will be like, well, at least we got him to back off that.
At least it's more moderate.
That's a very positive view towards. I don't see it like that at all. What I see is all
Trump has done since he's take office is lose, lose, lose, lose. He must be tired of losing.
Right. And the immigration ban is just one of those issues that people give him credit
for, like building the wall because he signed an executive order, building the wall. Either
Mexico is going to pay for it,
which we all know is bullshit, or Congress is going to pay for it.
And an executive order doesn't have any –
Which they've expressed their intention to do.
The thing is, all Trump has done thus far is add a wall to his Christmas wish list.
That's all that executive order is, I wish I had a wall.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying though.
He's making that step, and it's showing his supporters who are into that like okay he didn't immediately abandon it like i feel like it's a symbolic
gesture just to appease his face right now without without actually doing anything and it's kind of
like the same he did an executive he enacted an executive order a couple weeks ago that was like
a tough on crime executive order that didn't do anything it It was just like, we're going to be tough on crime. The only thing he's actually
done is make it legal for
coal-fired energy plants to dump their
waste in rivers. That's the only executive
order he's signed. Which rivers?
All rivers? I don't know.
For corporations not to have
to disclose
bribing foreign officials.
Or foreign officials
giving them money.
Basically, I think either way.
They don't have to declare income from
outside governments now.
I mean, right? Finally.
We've been asking for that for so long.
If there were two things I was hoping
he'd get done, it's more bribes
and poison in the water.
That's why I voted for him.
Dirtier water in those areas you know well i think that
how do you defend that though as a supporter no i do you i thought he was a lesser of two evils
option i don't think that hillary would have been better in this way i think she's shown that she's
sold herself out to capitalists and crony capitalists and those big companies oil whatever
the fuck it just seems silly to take
all of this shit that is bad with trump obviously i'm not going to wholly defend him because he's
not great but the whole turning it up to 11 thing and everything is catastrophized everything is the
end of the world like it's just it's turning people off i think well and making people who
are in the middle feel more like,
well, goddamn, I don't trust these media people anyway from the right and the left.
And the fact that at every opportunity they go, hey, what's this?
Well, there's still actually no evidence whatsoever of Russia hacking the election.
But let's just play it up, turn it up to 11.
But that's not true.
NBC reported it yesterday, that there still no no evidence that he hacked that
there's russian involvement in the election mathis said today that he's pretty sure there is but and
and those 17 intelligence agencies that whole thing they just agreed that if russia were to do
it the way that it was done was consistent with ways that they would assume russia would have done
that's no i think i think i think you're mistaken nbc reported yesterday that there was no evidence
specific evidence that people on trump's team colluded with Russia. But they did not report that there's no evidence
that Russia involved themselves with this election. That, I think, is pretty much out
there in the open at this point. As you said, Rex Tillerson and General Mattis are both
departing from him and saying, it's pretty clear, it's pretty obvious. And these are people that are getting the highest of classified briefings.
So they're seeing stuff that some people in Congress aren't seeing and they have access to information that obviously civilians don't have.
None of that stuff bothers me.
NBC said that investigations have found no collusion between Trump campaign and contacts in Russia.
So that's not the same thing as saying that Russia didn't do it.
But wait, I want to get this in.
The point that Hutch was
saying was like, hey, the Russians did it
without any provocation.
We don't know that his campaign was working
with them. But we do know that
Trump literally said this. I will tell you
this, Russia, if you're listening,
I hope you're able to find the 30,000 emails
that are missing. I think you'll be
rewarded by our press, mightily by our press.
Right?
So, like, yes, Trump literally asked the Russians to do it, and the Russians did it, and we're all here saying, well, there's no evidence.
Well, the Russians didn't do that.
They hacked Podesta and the DNC.
They didn't hack her emails, if I could just be a little picky there.
Okay, okay, that's fair.
They were confused.
But them saying that there's no evidence that there was collusion between Trump's team and Russian officials
is not saying that there isn't possible evidence out there.
What they're reporting is that you had three high-level members of Trump's team
consistently in contact with Russian officials throughout the entire campaign.
Like, at what point do you point to that and say, well, there might be a fire over there?
And the implications of that are pretty fucking stunning.
Because that's never happened in our history before.
So this whole talk about catastrophizing things, yes, the end of the world might be a little hyperbolic,
but to suggest that this might undermine
the very fabric of our democracy,
I don't think is an overstatement.
I think it's a-
I heard Senator Orton saying that,
he's like, we don't have proof proof,
what we have is smoke.
There's smoke everywhere, and we'll see if there's fire.
Kyle?
Yeah, this sounds like what happens to every president.
There's this conspiracy, like, hey, if these pieces fall together, this all looks really bad.
We just don't know.
I don't think we're ever going to know what was going on there.
What really bothered me that is real 100% because we saw it with our eyes is how he handled that press conference today.
You know, he calls on this one reporter.
And before he even calls him, he's like, ah, this ought to be a good question, right, folks?
Ought to be a real hump dinger.
All right, let's go to you.
Let's go to you.
You're always fair.
He did that a few, he did that a few, with a few reporters there.
And it's a Jewish guy with a yarmulke.
He is, he's like, yes, Mr. President, I'm always very fair to you.
I just wanted to ask because some of your supporters were committed anti-Semitic acts
in your name, and oh, oh, oh, here we go.
He said he was going to ask
a good question here this bullshit
is alright you just sit down I know
what you I know where you're headed with this I'll finish
up your question I'll finish asking your
question and then answer it for you I liked it
when the black reporter asked if they had met with like
the black caucus or something
he's like oh
yeah what well you
set it up then do you know them why don't you set it up then? Do you know them?
Why don't you set up the Black Caucus?
I'm sure that you have a good friend over there.
You people don't even know each other.
Why don't black people just work together?
I don't know.
He's – and to act like what – I feel like Kyle was like, well, this is normal.
All presidents go through this.
No.
Flynn has resigned in scandal.
The total number of high-ranking officials that have resigned in scandal across the Trump and Obama
combined is one.
No, no, no. Three. Well,
Donna Brazile, Eric Holder.
There's two right there.
I was just reading this.
Wait, wait, wait.
You know what?
There was Donna Brazile and then also Debbie
Walshman Schultz. She had to resign too.
I'm talking about senior people in Obama's thing. Eric Holder, Donna Brazile. Walshman Schultz, she had to resign too. No, no, no. I'm talking about senior people in Obama's thing.
Eric Holder, Donna Brazile.
Walsherman Schultz did not work for him.
Did Donna Brazile maybe previously did?
I'm talking about resigned.
She didn't work for the campaign.
No, they worked for the DNC.
Yeah, no, no.
You can't just grab all Democrats across history because there's plenty of dirty ones.
Or across the last three years.
Or across the last three years.
Neither of those work.
Obama had no one as high-ranking as Flynn. But I said Eric Holder
because that's the only one that I know of.
That's the one that did some bad stuff.
It was Loretta Lynch.
I don't think in disgrace.
Loretta Lynch didn't resign.
I'm trying to think of the name.
Is this wrong? Because I just read about this today.
She's the Attorney General and
Holder resigned is what it was.
Well, from Trump's campaign you have carter
page paul manafort and now michael flynn all either being fired or resigning because of close
ties to russia and we you know i i experienced a lot of pushback on social media and my ads from
people saying like oh your excuse is just blah blah blah the russians at what point do you say
like this seems kind of fucking shady?
Like, at what point when you have,
and these aren't just people like an intern
or someone kind of,
these are top-level members of his,
not cabinet, but his campaign team,
and now three of them are being ousted
because of close ties to Russia.
I think if that doesn't concern you
at the very least, I'm not saying it has to convince
you that they're criminals.
If that doesn't concern
you, well then I think that
everybody should be advocating for
free and open press, a bipartisan
or maybe even a nonpartisan
investigation into this.
Not something that's behind closed doors
like what's happening or what might happen
on the Senate Intelligence Committee,
but something that is public,
out in the open, transparent.
I think Americans have a right to know,
and I think American voters
had a right to know
what was going on
before the fucking election.
And I'm just dumbfounded
that Comey thought it was relevant
to talk about Anthony Weiner's laptop
when he also had access to all this
fucking verifiably shady shit that was going on.
I mean, that's just nuts.
That bothers me too.
That's a strong point.
Like this guy literally like was a week or two before the election was like, yeah, we're
going to reinvestigate.
We've got a bunch of stuff we need to talk about with Hillary Clinton when he literally
had two weeks before the elections.
And then like it was too late when he said everything
is cool but he had the same sort
of Trump campaign officials
are working with the Russians. Don't know
what they're saying just that they're contacting
back and forth with the Russians and
he doesn't say a word until after Trump's
elected. That makes a
person nervous.
Look this election was so
close right one got the electoral votes one got the popular vote a lot of those states were just
razor thin you know decided days later in in some cases as to who actually took them uh you could
point to a dozen things that would have tipped it the other way and that was easily one of them
yeah i think one thing to keep in mind though is that like if you're if you're russia if you're vladimir putin let's set aside the fact that he
seems to be a pretty brutal guy that murders his like competition and news media and you know has
you know made these incursions into ukraine and basically conquered another part of another
country you can say what you want about those people maybe what felt more russian than ukrainian
in the in that region but still it's not right what he did.
But I think if you look at what's he benefiting,
I want to know what his benefit, what Russia benefit is from the Trump presidency.
I think what it is is that Hillary had clearly outlined a lot of steps
that made things really hard on the Russians.
From the sanctions that would have...
The no-fly zone?
Well, from the Obama sanctions that would have continued on
to the no-fly zone that they wanted to impose in Syria,
which is just a red line in Syria
that if it's crossed, it's like,
do we let two red lines get crossed now
because Obama had the whole thing in Syria?
Oh, if you use chemical weapons, we're coming in.
Then they use chemical weapons that kill hundreds of civilians.
I think that she was basically kind of threatening
an air war with Russia if they didn't
stop bombing. I think
they felt that it behooved them to have a
Donald Trump presidency. That's what it appears like
on the outside. What I'm afraid of
and I think what
people to the far to the left want to say
oh it's got to be this, is that
the Russians have something on him or they
own him or he's their boy like Saturday Night Live
would make it seem.
SNL's been hilarious, by the way. That's the best thing about the Trump presidency.
To add to what you were saying, there's also too much effort to be like,
the whole reason it was lost was because of the Hillary email thing or the Comey reinvestigation.
You have to remember, the biggest, most, like you were saying, the razor-thin thing,
yeah, I totally disagree with that, because the reason that he won was because of those rust belt states and you keep in mind all of those rust belt states those counties voted
obama 08 and 2012 these are people who probably felt this and you can say you can speculate and
say oh it was that that caused it but i think it's more likely that they felt hey fuck i thought we
were going to start getting a lot better i thought manufacturing was coming back and i feel a little
betrayed by the last eight years and so screw this this. I'm going to the other side.
So you can't say that – because they're the same people who voted for Obama.
I understand, yeah.
There are people that voted two terms in a row for Obama.
That did switch to Donald Trump.
The math just – that has to be the case.
But if you look at her poll numbers before Comey made that announcement, she had like an average of, I think, like an 11 point lead on.
What is it? Real clear politics, which is like an aggregate of all the super like, well, real clear politics.
I thought you're talking about a different one. Go ahead. No, no, no. Yeah. Real clear politics.
They're not like when it comes to aggregation, they don't like only pick liberal leaning.
They have like Fox News in there.
They had like the LA Times, which is like the only, do you remember them?
They were like the only one who had him up the whole time.
And it was because, if you actually looked into that, it's because they had a black guy in their small, that was based on like a small group.
And they had a black guy in there
that was that was voting for trump and they waited his well i'm not actually describing this properly
but it was a really strange explanation for why they had him up the entire time that's what her
but her her margin in the polls was like she had him like really crushed really crushed and then
comey came out and announced this totally inconsequential investigation that led to nothing, that he knew nothing about.
He hadn't even seen those emails yet, or he hadn't even reviewed the contents of it yet.
He felt it incumbent upon him to announce that, and all of a sudden it became razor thin.
It was like neck and neck.
The polls right before the election where everybody was sure
Hillary was going to win.
By like two points
though. It's not like everybody said it was going to be
this massive blowout.
Most people thought it was going to
be a big Hillary win.
On the state level, obviously
there needs to be some tweaking as far as
how they collect and interpret their
data, but when you look at on the whole nationally, almost all the big outlets got it right.
Like it was within the margin of error.
It wasn't they were not predicting like they gave her incredibly high odds.
Right. Like I think a lot of places were giving her a 90 percent chance or a 95 percent chance of 85.
A lot. Ninety ninety eight. The New York Times, I think.
But a five or two percent or a 10% chance is still a chance,
and that's going to happen, obviously, 10% of the time.
And so when it does, people treat it like it's this statistical anomaly.
No, it was always a possibility.
And yeah, the polls were not as wrong as everybody makes them out to be.
If you just look at their math, then it's pretty evident.
It seems not fair.
Everyone on television seemed to be
very fucking shocked that night.
There was no one who was saying what you're saying.
Well, you know, hey, you flip a coin ten times,
one of those times, Trump's gonna win.
They were all like, we're not sure
what to say, ladies and gentlemen.
It's possible I'm being duped.
Every poll was wrong.
Every poll but LA Times, apparently,
with the one weighted black guy.
Did they interview that guy?
Because that guy should have gotten on TV.
The guy who ran the LA Times show,
he should have been interviewed everywhere
to sit in the sun for his day.
In fairness, though,
him winning Pennsylvania,
Michigan,
Ohio,
Florida, him winning all of those states Him winning Pennsylvania, Michigan, Ohio, fucking Florida.
Him winning all of those states was the same as drawing to an inside straight draw.
He shot the moon.
It's going to fucking happen.
I understand that it's shocking, and it shouldn't be a source of disparagement towards the press to say that.
I mean, it's's shocking but it could have
happened and it did happen so here we are now i i i really don't think that the polls got it as
wrong as you're saying it's bothering me a lot that the trump administration is lying so much
and that goes from the top to pretty much anyone that gets in front of a camera
kelly and conway now is just not getting booked like
she used to because what you're supposed to do is get like a senior official and have them explain
like what's going on and she's so sneaky morning joe said they wouldn't book her anymore yeah they
did cnn did then they backtracked on it but so there's been at least two i don't know who else
is on board with that but i i'll do another tangent on her. But she's
just a dedicated liar. And
Trump is a liar. And it seems
like that, who's the bald
Igor-looking guy?
Stephen Miller. Stephen Miller's
the one I'm going for. He will not
be questioned.
Talk like that.
I get that. We can laugh about that.
Right. There's something. It's a little frightening. Pretty scary. I didn't get that. We can laugh about that. And it's good.
Right.
There's something that's a little frightening.
Pretty scary.
I didn't get that.
Oh, yeah, he did.
He's like his power will not be questioned.
And Stephen Colbert nailed it.
Daniel Day Lewis and Lincoln, where he goes, I am a man cloaked in great power.
He spoke very authoritatively.
And I've never heard a White house official speak like that yeah my life never the thing is i feel like we're almost normalizing how fucked up this is
and it's not normal right it's not normal for people at flynn's level to get to resign in
scandal this isn't typical it's not normal for foreign like russia to have this level of
interference it's not normal for the fbi to come out and announce shit. They have got shit on both
candidates like that happened. It's not normal
for Trump, the president, to get up and lie like
Obama did
State of the Union addresses and he would
tell his speech writers, look,
when they do fact-checking the next day,
I want to nail it. I want them to come up with nothing
when they do all the fact-checking on my
State of the Union. And it happened.
Repeatedly. He'd do a State of the Union address it'd all be true trump can't talk for five minutes without lying and i've got a list here did you see he actually got called out in the press
conference today in a really brilliant way about about the electoral college as if he's not
responsible for what he says right he's like look i want the biggest electoral college blowout since
reagan someone stands up and goes,
George W. Bush, Clinton, and Obama
both beat your margins.
Bush Sr., Clinton,
and Obama all beat.
I went H.W.,
sorry.
But yeah, as if
people don't have just access to this number,
you can just lie.
That's such an easy thing to check.
That's one of my issues with the way he lies. I'm half Mexican, don't have just access to this number you can just that's such an easy thing to check just like
that's like him being like i've actually brought this up before i'm half mexican i'm half mexican
so i'm banking on that boat it's like no you're not i googled it you're a white guy he lies
constantly about everything the circuit is in chaos you know that that circuit is he was saying
the ninth court the ninth circuit all those people are in chaos and turmoil totally untrue
our administration inherited many problems across the government and across the
economy. I inherited a mess.
Total bullshit, right?
The economy's been growing for
like seven years in a row. Our
unemployment rate is as low as it's ever been.
I think we can find better lies than that, though,
because that's really subjective, right?
Our workforce participation rate is down from 2009.
I don't think you know.
The workforce participation rate is a bullshit number. And't think you know like the workforce participation
rate is a bullshit number and the thing is this we've been measuring unemployment by the
unemployment rate since 1940 by the same metric yeah this is the same metric here so what they
do is the republicans unhappy about the unemployment rate unemployment you can't change it to say oh
there's a new category of people that's no longer seeking work. And they're not unemployed. They're just no longer seeking work. And so when you change
the metric and the methodology, then that becomes useless.
So when someone stops looking for a job for several years,
then they stop saying that that person is unemployed. It's been that way since 1940.
I don't think they have changed their methodology, Mark.
No, this is the thing that I know. 1940. I don't think they have changed their methodology, Mark. I think they've been
measuring it the same way.
We've had like seven years
of sustained growth or something like that.
The people who are doing it in a different way are the people who start
including women and children and retirees.
When they come up
with a 42% unemployment rate,
they're counting my son Colin in numbers
like that. That's insane.
That is insane to say there's a 42%.
And he would say that at his rallies.
He's probably still saying it now.
I don't even know anymore.
But he would routinely use that statistic, like 42%, 50%.
It could be as high as 60%, 70%.
Insane stuff.
Yeah.
For one thing, they're not including children in the workforce participation.
There are different ways to measure the workforce participation rate and when you get to
numbers like 40 and 60 percent you have to be including kids because it's not as
funny 42 percent of adults part of this okay it's not as if 42 percent of adults
are not working what I don't have my calculator here to defend these
arguments god damn it
Let's talk about Sean Spicer and Melissa McCarthy on the set when when her
Podium turned into a segue. Yeah. Oh my god, man. I fucking died
He's coming for ya
Did you hear the reports that he was really upset that a woman played him like specifically i mean who knows who knows not source though i think it was an onion article publicly handled it well publicly
he's like you know she needs to cut down on the amount of gum she's chewing or something like it
yeah i thought he handled it fine spicer say that or yeah trump say that no literally spicer was
like i thought it was funny but she ate too much gum and then her second time out she pulls out
the largest piece of gum a human being's, literally this big piece of gum.
And she rolls it up and takes the biggest bite that she's capable of taking out of it.
She's like, yeah, I'm cutting down on the gum.
They're doing God's work over there.
They really are.
It's funny.
The people that Trump hates are really succeeding.
CNN's ratings are going up.
I just read an article today about how invigorated theirated their stuff is New York Times is doing great CNN is doing
great New York I'm sorry I meant to say Saturday Night Live is doing better than
they have and I don't know how long but some very long period of time all of
them just like InfoWars is probably doing really good right now just like
Breitbart's but like print media or news news media right now like is is the I think
probably like the most popular it's been and yeah since when like Monica Lewinsky probably like
wars too like one more bitch thing about Trump that I didn't like I didn't watch the whole thing
today but I saw clips when he blamed the media for Flynn getting fired it It was like, all that you had to do
was not fire Flynn
and then say, see, the
deep state wants me to fire him. They're trying to dredge up
all this stuff. I'm not going to let it happen.
And his supporters would be like, yeah, we're not going to let the deep state
do it. But then he fires Flynn
and then says, oh, the media made me fire Flynn.
It's ridiculous. And it's like, no,
do you think everybody here is retarded? You're the
only one who could have fired him. You to fire him though you fired him stop saying the media did
the new york times just reported today or it might have been washington post i'm pretty sure it was
the new york times they just reported today that he did in fact fucking lie to the fbi which is
what he was chanting lock her up at trump's rallies he was saying the same shit to hillary
for for allegedly lying to the FBI.
And now, like, he might be in some deep shit, man, and he's going to be summoned or subpoenaed,
probably, to speak in front of some kind of an oversight committee.
I just read the opposite. I don't know what will happen.
The other thing, Trump is blasting this whole leak thing, and I find that to be very bitchy, too.
There's two things about Trump that the hypocrisy is frustrating me or he loved leaks during the election campaign right yeah they're the election cycle Hillary's leaks were fucking fabulous he
loved them telling Russia to do it right and now that he's having leaks against
him it's it's not okay it's you know it's trees it is whatever well there is
a difference right well hang on a second let's think the difference, at least the perceived difference from his side.
He's the president of the United States, and they're leaking stuff from within his White House about him and other leaders, whereas we were talking about Hillary Clinton, like private individual Hillary Clinton with her private server and the private organization of the DNC.
That is a glaring difference.
I mean there's a lot of things that you can't do to the President and the White House
that, you know, I could tell a secret
from this household, right? But if you tell
a secret from the White House, I think it's a little bit
different. Well, he was asking for leaks from
Secretary of State, though, right?
There were Secretary of State emails that he
specifically told Russia to hack,
right? You know, those 30,000 emails
they were heard. Defined. Well, there is...
She lost them. Yeah, she bleached
the fuck out of those. Yeah, that's true.
The ones he wanted them to find were ones that
she was like, ah, I've lost them. If I had them, you guys
could look. She's no angel. I agree with you on that.
But he loved leaks
against the Secretary of State. He
hates leaks against himself. President,
give him a chance. He also hated links
when he talked
about Snowden, right?
He said very bad things about Snowden in the past.
So he's definitely been left, right, and then back.
A reporter at the press conference specifically made that point today.
Why did you love the leaks then and you don't love them now?
And he said, well, the difference is they're leaking classified info.
That's not different.
Yeah, that wasn't different.
That was classified shit for
hillary too that's why she was in trouble and by the way i just uh real quick emails were classified
i'm saying like uh real quick i did check so they changed the unemployment rate in 2010
uh it used to be that after two years they would make it so you were no longer
seeking work and they'd take you out of that. They changed it to five years. Oh, so it's almost the opposite of your argument.
I would have to understand, explain that. What do you mean?
Well, he was, it seems like now you have to be-
Here, I'll just read it. It's a 2010 article. I just found it. So who knows? I just thought
it was interesting.
Citing what it calls an unprecedented rise in long-term unemployment, the Federal Bureau of Labor Statistics beginning Saturday will raise from two years to five years the upper limit on how long somebody can be listed as having been jobless.
Yeah, wouldn't that hurt your argument?
Yeah, that would destroy your argument.
I'm just looking into it. I wasn't trying to fuck you over anything the move could
be better could help economists better measure the severity of the nation's prolonged economic
downturn the change is a sign that to bureau officials quote are afraid that a cap of two
years may be understating the true average duration but they won't know by how much until
they raise the upper limit so basically what they're saying is that they won't know how long
people are truly unemployed if they take it down to two years so they have to extend it to five years because there's such a huge number of people
who have been under unemployed for over two years that it's no longer useful data to stop
well you say a huge number but like the rate is that 5.2 percent now or something like that like
so this is keep in mind this is a 2010 article so they 2010 article. So back then the unemployment rate was higher.
They still do record it that way.
So basically the economy was so bad that so many people were jobless for over two years that they had to make that bigger so that they could garner more valuable information.
The economy bottomed out somewhere around 2009.
So the first year Obama came in.
2008, right? Didn't it start in 2008? Yeah, as the end of 2008, because as soon as he came into office, he was dealing with that crash.
I don't think he turned it around. There were job losses in his first couple of months,
if I recall correctly. I don't know. I don't have it in front of me. But so in my head,
somewhere around 2009, the economy started picking up and getting better. That doesn't
mean unemployment was down at like 4% back in 2009.
They just started adding like 150,000, 220,000 jobs a month all that time until unemployment
now, which is actually quite low.
And the notion that Trump inherited something that's messed up is just totally wrong.
As a matter of fact, so because unemployment was so low, the way supply and demand works
is wages weren't rising. Unemployment
was dropping, but wages weren't rising.
Now it is. Wages are going up too
because it's harder to find people
who get to pay more.
It's just not fair to pretend that Obama recovered
from this huge, and now we're just surging again.
I think, and I could be wrong on this, but I think he's the
only president in history to not have at least 2%
GDP growth.
The foreign policy has been a disaster.
The entire Middle East is burning and in shit
because everything he touched over there went badly.
Iran doesn't give a fuck about the deal they signed with us.
Hey, here, take this money. Don't spend it on anything over there.
Oh, all right, fuck you. We're going to do whatever we want.
We didn't give them money. We were paying an old debt.
We bought weapons from them.
It was like $1.5 billion and we just never paid them.
So he agreed to pay our debt.
That was money that we owed to them.
And I don't see the world burning quite the same way you do.
And again, you know, sometimes I talk about this, like the lens that we look through.
I know Kyle doesn't like to hear it.
But to me, the world is more or less at peace.
You know, is the Middle East fighting?
Yes. I like George Carlin's, is the Middle East fighting? Yes.
I like George Carlin's bit.
The Middle East fights.
They always fight.
They fought from the beginning of time, a trillion years from now, when the sun is hurtling
towards the earth and there's nothing left but amoeba.
The amoebas in the Middle East will be fighting one another.
So to pin that on Obama doesn't seem fair to me.
I feel like, yeah.
It's also ignoring like a century's worth of
That's what I'm saying.
like foreign intervention
and like other countries coming in
and practicing like
the fighting like Iraq and Afghanistan.
Like those things really,
like that was a W. Bush war.
Now, don't misinterpret what I'm saying.
I'm not saying that the Middle East
is a pile of shit
and struggling right now
because of Obama. There have been huge problems there for a long time. I'm not saying that the Middle East is a pile of shit and struggling right now because of Obama.
There have been huge problems there for a long time.
I'm just saying that it's a bit silly to be like, oh, you know, well, first of all, Trump should not be pretending that he inherited a worse America, quote unquote, than Obama did.
Because I don't think that's true. I think Obama had a lot more hurdles to jump over because it was at the very beginning of a recession borderline depression you know but also we can't pretend that obama fixed everything and that it's all
hunky-dory from here you know just don't fuck up donald like no there's a lot of foreign policy
issues uh our economy is not booming at all we're improving i guess marginally didn't the
didn't the dow just close at like a record high again today or something like that?
I don't want to give Donald Trump credit for that just because he's president.
I'm not either.
That's a result of sustained economic growth over the last seven, eight years.
I'm biased about calling the Obama era terrible because I had a really good eight years.
In the last eight years, I got on YouTube.
I opened a business, two businesses.
I got kind of rich. It's been a real good fucking run for me and and to hear like oh my god everything is
terrible the world is on fire etc i'm like really like i i get it the lens i look through it is a
little rose tinted right circumstances are a little bit different i think i'll get my i didn't
have the typical eight years that everyone else did under the obama term like i follow that i didn't i didn't make any money off of my minecraft server
but um but you know look the minecraft server did well it wouldn't have done as well if the
world was on fire you know that that's that's just how it is you know well video games are
have proven to be pretty recession proof because people
end up well because people end up the logic goes that people end up spending more on things that
they can entertain themselves with at home instead of you know if i spend 50 hours playing skyrim and
i only paid 60 bucks for it that sure beats 60 hours worth of going to the movies or going to
a restaurant or something like that so even during So even during that big crash of 2009, Call of Duty was doing great.
Yeah, that was its year.
Prostitution always does well.
Are we talking about recession-proof industries and businesses by any chance as I step back in?
Is this our cue to talk about prostitution?
Drugs and prostitution.
Ah, yes.
This sounds like a lot of fun.
Let's go in this direction.
Do you guys think it should be legal oh absolutely i'm just guessing everybody here
what are we talking about drugs or prostitution or both i think that both all drugs except for
like uh i don't know there's some that just seem so horrible that that even meth seems so scary to
me i said i always talk about the scariest anti-meth commercial it's literally like an
underage boy like in a hotel room and like an like with his shirt off and at the end like a 45
year old man puts his hand on his shoulder he goes are you ready like it's like oh shit he's
like prostituting himself for a man and i'm like and then he goes meth not even once and i'm like
you're goddamn right no one sticks up for pedophiles ever i was behind a house one time we were smoking
cigarettes with these guys.
And I didn't know these guys I was hanging out with.
Just hadn't met them.
But it seemed like we were kind of, you know, we were getting along.
We weren't hitting it off, per se.
But we were getting along.
There were no, like, rough feelings.
I didn't think these guys were shady.
We were all smoking our cigarettes together and talking about stuff.
And meth came up.
And I said, hey said hey meth not even
once am i right and the one guy to my left goes oh you know every now and then gotta ride that
blue crystal you know and i'm and and i'm like no i i don't know i don't think it's blue either
and then the other guy's like hey every now and then you know every now and then sure sure it's
good stuff and i was like all right well i'm gonna get the fuck up out of here
because i'm hanging out with two meth heads and i had no goddamn idea so so everything but meth
no no it's not a casual drug no but did you guys do you guys think that trump is gonna uh
trump and sessions are gonna hold to the the promise of respecting state laws when it comes to the medicinal
marijuana? I do, and here's why. I think that all of Trump's fake religiousness when he appeals to
Christians and stuff is just that. It's very fake. I don't think he has some moral reason to hate
marijuana. He does have this moral high ground of, oh, I don't smoke cigarettes. I don't drink
alcohol. Never had no drugs. No drugs, no alcohol. alcohol yeah he's big on that high ground but it seems like the thing that he worships trump's real god is the
dollar and like uh i just can't see him saying oh that one billion dollar business you've got going
on colorado we're shutting that down um you know we're gonna replace it with better what like like
like no i just can't see him saying how much of a cut do the feds take like um i think
they did a billion dollars worth of business in colorado last year and there's no reason to think
that this year probably won't be actually higher out alcohol this year more taxes for weed than
alcohol in colorado that's bananas like it's so much money to be made like if he knows anything
about business i can't imagine being against legalizing marijuana it's like you're just allowing a black market to exist for no reason missing out on tax
dollars if you want to throw a sin tax on it like alcohol and tobacco fuck it do it people will be
happy because they'll be buying it legally and safely they need to figure out they need to figure
out they need to invest some money and do some scientific research and figure out a way to um
deal with driving under the influence
because if you smoke pot regularly like let's say you smoke pot every single day you're not high but
you get in a car accident they take your blood and they find um a decent amount of marijuana in
your system you could be charged in some states for a dui even though even if you haven't smoked
that morning like that's another how are they going to do that like measure in real time it doesn't it
doesn't work that way scientifically it doesn't there's nothing now on your breath or something
um they they have a breath test but they also have a blood test and neither one of them work
because who knows about tolerance levels right you look at somebody like uh coco diaz right like
that guy could sit down and and smoke you know a quarter ounce or something and then probably go
for a drive and it would just it just wouldn't affect him whereas if you got some little high
school girl who just hit her first joint she gets in her car she's not even she's gonna be seeing it
at like 15 frames per second as she turns out yeah it's gonna be like it affects you very
differently especially when you're young that's why why I don't like... I like that marijuana is starting to become
more accepted
in mainstream culture,
but I do worry about kids
because I think
that's something that you should wait until you're
25.
You have to protect these kids!
I'm not saying it's the end of the world
if you caught your kid smoking a joint or something like that,
but if you have a kid who's regularly smoking pot when they're 15 years old, I don't think that's good for your health.
It's not. It's not good for your brain chemistry.
There's been studies about that.
Like if you're a kid, there's a difference between like, you know, we all say like, hey, look at Willie Nelson, look at Snoop Dogg.
These guys are like still writing songs and they've smoked pounds and pounds of weed over decades.
But I don't know. I don't think there's much.
I wouldn't want them as like my accountant though.
Perhaps not.
Especially Willie. He struggles.
He has a history
of struggling with that. Yeah, especially
Nelson. But yeah, I think prostitution
should be legal, getting back to what we were saying. For sure,
100%. Everything gets better
when prostitution becomes legal. There's fewer
STDs, fewer pimps abusing women, fewer
like, forced prostitution,
less... Sex trafficking is a big fucking deal, yeah.
Yeah, let's not forget about the disease,
because I'm sure we've all gotten an STD or a couple from a dirty prostitute.
It happens. It's an unregulated...
It's just part of life.
Like spending $1,000 on a magic deck, you do it every couple years.
As Ricky from Southern Park Boys would say, no big deal.
Okay, no big deal. no big deal it just happens um
so yeah all of those things would be better and these are things that not only make the situation
better notice everything i said it's better for the prostitute right like the only thing that's
better for the john if you will is a you don't have to risk you know your picture being in the
paper next week and mama seeing it and b you know you're probably much less likely to get an std
because there's
like a regulate regulation going on or some sort of testing going on like they're like in the porn
you're gonna be infinitely less likely to get an std because you're not going to be going to
cd guy on the corner getting a prostitute you're going to be going to uh you know samson and son
sex corporation and they're going to have an incentive to be like all right we got to make
sure all our girls are clean we don't want to get sued we need to make sure that we're paying people fair wages
because this is now a competitive market where we need to make sure we have the best people like
they don't want to look at us and go why go to uh you know this company where i can go to sexy
susans and get the same thing for half price like it introduces competitiveness competition so you're
able to get a three-titted woman over there like black markets just never make anything safer for
the people at the end like That's what I don't
get about people who are like, I don't want to legalize prostitution.
It's like, well, if you care about the
quote, victims of it
who would be the women in the current circumstance
and the current archetype,
those would be some of the biggest
people who are winning from it if it were legalized.
They'd be able to go to work and feel safe.
I think the biggest
victim when it comes to prostitution
is, like, the wife or the husband.
I mean, some women use sex workers too,
so I'll speak in terms of both,
but the wife or the husband or the kids, you know?
I think those are, like, the actual victims.
I think we have to turn the focus on that wife or that husband
who's not giving their partner what they need at home,
not only physically and sexually, but perhaps emotionally,
because many of these men who reach out to sex workers are reaching out emotionally as much as physically.
These cold, dirty spouses back at home who sit there not paying their husbands the attention
that they deserve, that's where the focus should be.
You joke, but I think there's some truth to that.
It's 50-50, right?
I don't know about 50-50, some in some in some cases but still i think
it's a mistake to like blame them for someone else's decision but i mean yeah it could be an
indication that something else is missing yeah like there's this big misconception that guys
only that that they only seek out physical comfort and i think that that the case is um that you're
exactly right i think it's i think i think a lot of times men don't know how to reach out
when they have some kind of emotional need that needs to be fixed.
And the only thing that they know how to do in that moment
is to seek out an anonymous sexual encounter.
It might be the only accepted way of reaching out
in their sort of macho, machismo kind of lifestyle or world that they live in.
Within their friend group or maybe the mini universe they live in, it'd be really weird if you reached out to a counselor or to, you know,
a therapist or some kind. But if you reach out to a prostitute and then after sex, you lay there
with her for 30 minutes going, I don't know what I'm going to do. I got this problem and that
problem. And, you know, you just, I think that that happens a lot. And I'm not a frequent to
prostitutes or anything. I'm starting to really sound like it over here i can see the family thing of it like like you were saying hutch
where it could be damaging to the family but i almost see it like the same as like jose cuervo
or something like if some dad or mom out there wants to be a total horrible drunk and buy a
handle of tequila every day like you don't you wouldn't blame the the ability to purchase tequila
you know you'd be
like that person has no self-control and yeah it was made more difficult by the facilitating effect
of having that available and ready at the store but it's still like it's not that business's fault
yeah it's like getting it's like it's like the um like a codependent spouse of an alcoholic
getting mad at the liquor store for selling liquor it's like exactly that's the temperance
movement right and then and that what all those ladies were saying they were they were touch liquor shall never touch mine
excellent recall very nice that was that was that was in large part motivated by
religious purposes right like kind of living in a puritanical yeah yeah that was definitely at the
core of it that was that was that was a big part of trump breaks that out like as his next big
thing where he's like as i've mentioned hundreds of times i I don't drink, I don't smoke, I don't do
any of those things. And I think it's going to be best for you guys
if none of you do either.
Productivity will skyrocket.
The reason why I ask you guys
if
you thought that
Sessions and Trump would stick to letting
state societies, because it's like right out of Nixon's playbook.
When the anti-war movement was really ramping up in the early 70s, he used marijuana as
a tool to imprison political opponents, basically.
He saw this entire movement springing up, and he was threatened by it.
At the time, he was saying, these protesters don't affect me whatsoever.
But then privately in his memoirs, he recalled that they did have a profound effect on him so much so that he
allocated a certain amount of national guard to stay at home in case he needed to um quell a
local insurrection um and so i i wonder if if he manages to because like i don't know about you
guys but i personally think the chances
are greater that he will not
finish a full four-year term.
But should
he manage to hold onto power for a
while, and this really turns into
what we're seeing right now with the
Women's March and stuff like that, and the airport
protests and stuff like that,
it's possible
that that's a precursor to
something much much bigger and perhaps more volatile and violent so i do see it as totally
possible given his track record on never smoke never drink never do drugs that combined with
the fact that if he sees an opportunity to use uh laws uh when it comes to this stuff as a way to
put down any kind of protest,
I think he might explore that.
He's the type of person...
I feel like attacking we at all is a losing issue
at this point, in a way.
The modern thing to attack is terrorism.
No, the modern thing to attack is terrorism.
He would label you as a domestic terrorist,
and then the punishments are a little stiffer.
He can take you and
do all kinds of awful things to you.
Some enhanced interrogation
techniques, perhaps.
I don't think that's possible, especially when you see
how his travel ban...
You're in the streets fomenting
insurrection? Fucking domestic
terrorists. Let's lock that person up.
Let's have a military tribunal.
They're going to have to send you to Gitmo.
Some of them are fucking terrorists.
Some of the protesters, not all of them, them not even close but some of the ones with
masks at burke yeah berkeley admit yeah i went to one of the airport uh airport protests in san
francisco and a couple people showed up with masks i was like yeah fuck these guys start pulling some
shit man this is gonna suck like bats and molotov cocktails like those aren't protesters and that's
not at all reminiscent of the rest of those people there when the furniture shows up you know that maybe this isn't the movement you
want to be part of or at least you're in the wrong building the furniture shows up is that what you
said the furniture you're like i think i was supposed to be in building 1a this is 1b for
sure yeah that you guys have the riot gear yeah wow tell me just tell me just tell me that you
guys aren't aren't the guys that are saying that's the left oh look at what the left is doing tell me that you guys aren't the guys that are saying, that's the left.
Oh, look at what the left is doing.
Tell me that you guys recognize that those are fucking anarcho-communists that are specifically...
Yeah, those are not...
If you talk to an average liberal or someone on the left, they're going to look at that and be like,
yeah, of course I don't want that on my team.
I don't think any normal liberal person is going to look at that and be like,
yeah, yeah, we're going to show them by breaking Starbucks, I suppose like no that's not remnant
That doesn't represent the last. Remember they destroyed that limo during the inauguration and it was what was it?
Was it either a Muslim man's limo or it was it was a Muslim man owned the business that the limo belonged to it
Okay. All right. So so yeah, right? Yeah
Alright, so yeah, right?
That sucks to me.
We know that that's not... We've seen liberals. They don't usually
wear masks and
bring weapons into the street
and start screaming with big A's
with circles on their chest and stuff.
Those guys bring gas masks.
I feel like the media, in a lot of ways, is trying to play it up
and make it seem like, on the left,
there's a huge number of
these people. when i say media
i'm including right left center all of it and like they're trying to play it up there's a ton of
rioters and you know domestic terrorists on the left just like the media is trying to pretend
like there's a huge number of real nazis out there who are like oh sig heiling and everything
when really both of those groups are not representing the core constituency of either
party like an average republican looks at an actual skinhead and is like oh that's really
uncomfortable i don't like that and then the average looks at someone right the media and
our politicians and everyone blows so many things that are such small issues in our actual life out
of proportion that it makes me wonder like what's actually going on because the whole terrorism
thing look at how many americans have died from terrorists, via terrorists, since 9-11. And there are so many things that
are much more deadly by...
Yeah, you have a greater chance of being shot by a toddler.
Toddler! Toddlers with guns! That's... like, okay...
I don't like that argument.
And that makes sense, there's something about guns, but it probably says something
about terrorism. It says that we're not in that much danger but god we hear it constantly and our and our vetting and our current method of vetting or
before this whole thing was good it was really fucking good we didn't have a single we didn't
have a single fucking attack from uh from a refugee uh on american soil since like what
1975 i read or something like that or like one or two but none of them that actually resulted
in a loss of life like that but but my first thought of course is like you know like would
they really attack the second they got here like if if my if i'm some sort of terrorist organization
who's trying to plant agents in the united states via an immigration program this is a long-term
goal we're not just trying to get Ahmed in there to next week and
maybe he can set a school on fire we want to get like 30 guys in there right 50 guys so that we
could do something big and and you know globally newsworthy or something so maybe it's a long con
I have to know that it's preventative as well like you like it's not a good argument to be like
well this hasn't happened like this before so there's no sense in preventing it.
Times change.
ISIS did say we're going to send people over if you welcome refugees.
And so you can't really say that it's totally the same.
Well, global warming has never destroyed the world before.
It's never destroyed humanity.
It's never made it so we've never been able to come back from it.
So I guess just fuck all the green stuff we're doing.
It hasn't happened yet.
We'll be fine.
Well, global warming, you can actually measure the increase
and the effect that it's had.
You can actually see the real-world effects
that's happening right now every day.
I understand what you're saying, too,
but doesn't that seem kind of reminiscent
of preventative war with Iraq,
attacking them before they can attack us?
No, it's not just attack.
It's making it more difficult
for people from certain areas
of the world to come over. Areas that
we think are... Really difficult to get into this country, though.
For 90 days, though, right?
Like, his immigration thing is for 90 days.
It's 90 or 120.
To be honest,
the whole immigration thing was
poorly rolled out, poorly
written, poorly crafted.
It doesn't accomplish its goal.
Everything about it is bad, but the idea of just making things safer, making immigration tougher, being 1,000% sure that there's safety, I like that.
I just hate everything that he's done to accomplish it.
It was like shit.
There's people getting stuck in the airport.
everything that he's done to accomplish it.
It was like, shit, there's people getting stuck in the airport.
He rolled it out in the stupidest possible way ever to where that day that it rolled out,
there were actual people in customs trying to call their supervisors.
Like, I have no idea what to do.
Like, what the fuck? Do I let this person in?
Do I not let him in?
And they had to wait for hours.
So yeah, of course, the way he rolled it out
and the actual plan itself, I don't see it being that helpful.
That's why I assume he's going to step back and be like,
oh, actually, we're just doing extreme vetting.
We're stepping back, and that's our thing.
He said he announced today that he was going to –
well, I don't know if he was specifically saying that he was going to –
he did announce in the press conference today
that he was basically backing off the original ban
and that he would draft something new.
I really doubt that he's going to really back away from it because number one,
it had a surprising amount of support.
I think it was like 40,
48% or something like that of,
of Americans supported it.
I don't know what that number is now.
It might be lower,
it might be higher or something,
but I'm not Trump's biggest fan,
but even I sometimes think like,
well,
why is it that,
you know, some people in America feel like
everyone has a right to be an American like most countries feel like they get to pick and choose
who gets to be Canadian who gets to be Russian who gets to be whatever you know like I talked
on the show before I was like what if we replaced give me you're tired you're poor you're etc with
give me your overachievers, your well-educated.
Give us your hardworking entrepreneurs.
What if we were selective on who we brought in in that regard?
I don't know why we have to have this open door policy.
Why don't we use the same recruitment process the Yankees use?
I think it's what you're saying.
Instead of like the, who's a bad team?
St. Louis, whoever. Yeah. Cartels are always fun. I think it's what you're saying instead of like the who's a bad team the sealers whoever
Is it isn't there a humanitarian dilemma at the core of this though because when you have 11 million displaced people in Syria
at some point, I think, as a species,
a decent thing to do is to try to find these people a home.
You know, like, I can't imagine, me in my life, I can't imagine not having a home.
Like, I can't, that to me is so that concept is so foreign and when i try to imagine
what that would be like it's terrifying and when you have like there's a reason why germany and
sweden are letting in like a million fucking refugees because the united states let in like
10 000 which is nothing well also they could practically drive there right i mean you can
take a it's closer that's part of the reason people
are going there.
I feel like if the refugee crisis
was in Mexico,
the refugee crisis was in Mexico, we'd be taking
more than Germany.
If the argument was that...
If the argument was the homelessness of it...
If it was in Mexico, we'd take more than Germany.
If it was Obama.
Yeah, if it was Obama.
That's what I'm saying. Yeah, I hear trump the rules may be the homeless thing like i totally understand i empathize
what you're saying there we can help them a lot more if we built things there that money goes a
lot further if we build camps if we build things to help them there god forbid we pressure any of
those surrounding countries uh in fucking saudi arab Arabia to use their enormous tent cities to help these people.
Where are you going to build them?
In Syria, you have Assad using literal chemical weapons on his fucking population there.
So it's like – I don't think it's a really safe area to start building tent cities.
Taylor was referring to an already built tent city in Saudi Arabia.
There's already built tent cities in Saudi Arabia, in Qatar, I think.
Not in Yemen because they've been getting bombed a bit for years.
But there are places over there where they can be helped, where the money will go further.
And it doesn't make as much sense to bring, hey, we can bring 10,000 people over here for the cost that it would take to set up a giant camp over there for 150,000.
Should we do that?
Yeah, just do that.
We've talked about this before. I want to say it now.
I wish instead of the argument that Hutch used,
be a good guy, bring them in,
there was a better argument.
One like, hey, historically, you bring in these refugees,
it grows the economy, they become grocery store owners,
they become this, they become that.
It's good for America.
You know, Clinton, this is Bill Clinton, once said, you know, imagine if we took these refugees
and repopulated Detroit, right? And then suddenly that city was booming and vibrant again.
In my head, I picture Detroit like Baghdad. Like this is not a positive image in my head.
Maybe Baghdad is better than I'm giving you credit for But you know, I picture bombings and death
And all the bad shit
That I think of with a wrecked city
I love that, I love which direction it went
Hey, maybe I'm giving Baghdad too much credit though
Because they'd be rough in Detroit
I'm going to tell you right now
Nothing like Baghdad, 20 dead a day
So Bill Clinton
Is saying, you know, bring these refugees in
Repopulate Detroit, won't that make Detroit great?
If that's true, if there was some sort of like history or facts to back up this argument that bringing in refugees was good for America,
that would go so much farther than, hey, we should suffer and bring them because we have so much.
We should bring them in and give them some of what we have.
But that's already evident, though.
That's already evident.
I haven't seen anyone use that argument.
It's always be a good guy.
I don't know.
I've heard people use the argument that refugees and immigrants enrich and bolster our strength in this country.
I hear that a lot.
The argument that I get from that is more like diversity in the workplace is good.
Oh, we have a goal of getting more women or people of color or what have you.
I think it comes from, and like Sam Harris, I'm sure you guys probably know who Sam Harris is.
He's got a really great podcast.
I think he's written a few books.
But he made a point recently that really made sense to me.
And he's not the biggest fan of Islam, but he says our biggest ally right now should be moderate muslims like
what better way to um uh build build bridges or form uh a deeper understanding of each other
culturally than bringing moderate muslims into the mix and then those people have family back
at home and then perhaps we can start like i'm not the biggest like apologist for islam
or for a lot of religions for religions for that matter but at the same time i do see a value in
um bringing in moderate muslims it's a i i think that that could pay off huge for us in the long
run i wish that they started outlining their value you know instead of you should just be good
i well you know i mean i i'm i watch a lot of news more than you good. You're saying it now, I think. Well, you know, I watch a lot of news, more than you might guess.
Like, it's one of my passions, just keep following all this shit.
What channels do you watch?
Okay, it's mostly the internet.
So my sources are, like, CNN, Washington Post, like, from the left,
Fox News from the right, mostly what they write,
and then the video clips that are noteworthy
enough to get replayed on YouTube.
What do you guys think about Milo?
Let me finish it up.
No, no, we're not talking about Milo.
He got booked on Bill Maher, and I think
he's been on this show.
Yeah, no, that's fucking crazy.
One of them wouldn't come on because of Milo.
I think that's terrible.
He got on Bill Maher. That's a big show.'s terrible. That's what he got on Bill Maher.
That's a big show.
I think it's crazy that he's on Bill Maher.
He was on Tucker Carlson last week.
Yeah, he gets on all sorts of people.
Even before this show, he was on CNN and Fox constantly.
You know why he's getting in these shows?
Because people are shutting him down.
That's why he's getting in these shows.
What does this guy have to say?
What does he have to say that's upsetting so many people?
I've got to know now.
It's like the Barbra Streisand effect.
I don't know man he does he does shit though that like really is out of line though
he's a provocateur but he'll go to these colleges and name people by name call them call them out
as transgender or undocumented and then encourage people to fucking harass them. At what point do you cross that line?
And on top of that, I think he just says some shit sometimes
where he says that he's gay.
I think that's true.
He's gay.
He's very, very gay.
He seems quite gay.
He also says that he wishes he wasn't gay because it's wrong.
He's a self-hating Catholic. We've all met one of those that's every single one right?
He was sucking cock instead of liquor bust out the whole I'm a gay Jew thing, but his grandma was Jewish
She wasn't raised in the faith, and he's an outspoken Catholic. I found out by Jewish law
He's Jewish by Jewish law. He's Jewish. By Jewish law, he's Jewish. Yeah, your mother. You better respect their views, goddammit.
You missed what I figured.
They are Jewish.
But the thing I think about him is like what he said.
He is a provocateur.
I don't know.
I don't watch his stuff anymore.
And so I don't know what he's doing in his speeches.
But I guarantee it's not turning more people off him when there are huge riots.
No way.
Like, don't listen to this guy. He's a bigot, he's a horrible person.
It's like, does he ever burn down campuses or try to light girls' hair on fire or
mace people for no reason for wearing the wrong hat?
You're right.
It's the height of hypocrisy.
Like, I do recognize and respect people's right to protest him speaking.
And I do think that students have a right to organize and express
their discontent
with a decision
to let him speak, but as soon as you
start flipping cars over and lighting fires, you're no better
than... Or even blocking roads, right?
If you so much as prevent his entrance to the
lecture hall, then I have a problem
with you. You can speak too,
but it doesn't even have
to be destructive. It could just be blocking a door. i don't i don't approve of that if i were him anytime
anytime someone started rolled that thing out well like you know you're only one quarter jewish i
would like roll out a montage of like holocaust victims this is this is david morris he was
one-eighth jewish he died in auschwitz 1944 and it'd just be a fucking
montage of those like don't you question my heritage like i would i would definitely take
that ground he's got a nice he's got a nice little ground to stand on as a a gay jewish man
it makes a lot of the guys skip out a key piece bounce off of him a gay jewish man who likes black
cock right so now he can't be racist. Loves it. Yeah.
It doesn't make him immune to criticism.
I hear you, Hutch, but it's
an effective card.
Their criticism needs six men or four
to have an effect on him.
That's how good this is.
What I don't like
about him is what you're saying, Hutch,
the identity politics thing. I don't like how he was like oh a bunch of people i disagree with are have been
playing the identity politics game for years whatever oh we're all women and you're sexist
or racist because of this and so instead of attacking that i'm racist i'm going to adopt
identity politics because i hate your identity politics so much and it's like that's that's not
good we shouldn't be focusing at all on identity politics. It shouldn't be like, Hey, you said something racist. And then
he's like, actually, I'm a big fan of black people. So, you know, I mean, look at my boyfriend over
there. So, you know, clearly I'm not racist. It's like, no, well, that doesn't solve anything.
My criticism is deeper. It's this, it's like, I've had this knock against say Sean Hannity,
for example, or Glenn Beck. I don't believe that I've had to or Glenn Beck. I don't believe, I'd rather use Glenn Beck.
I don't believe that Glenn Beck
believes everything he says, right?
I think that sometimes he's just pushed,
throwing fireballs on things
because it's very profitable for him.
And I think that Milo might be,
I don't know what's in his head,
but I think that sometimes he's taking positions
because it's a successful business platform for him.
His book is doing very well right now.
He's getting booked all over the place.
His social media plug quote is probably going way up.
He has a scholarship fund for white males, right?
Yeah, he did that.
We were a little wondering.
Because he got called out for not doing it.
It's like we donated money to this guy,
and by we, I mean his supporters.
They got him $100,000 for the scholarship,
and he's just hanging on to this money.
And of course, his critics were like,
where's the money, Milo? Where's the money?
And I suppose setting up a fucking scholarship
is just something that takes a little while.
But he did it, so it's nice to see that.
That he wasn't going to pocket that money.
He did end up doing it, yeah, yeah.
And I don't know if he had... it's in the last month or two yeah it yeah i'm actually
made a it got a lot of attention i got the feeling like to what you're saying woody about him like
kind of faking some of it like maybe it was just the conversation we had with them on pka but i
felt like when we were talking with him about like feminism stuff and you know liberal slash
conservative stuff i felt like he believed what he was saying.
And then when we got to religion more, I felt like it was almost like, oh, you wouldn't expect the guy that's gay and Jewish to also be –
Catholic.
And he likes black guys to also be Catholic.
It was almost like a face.
Boom.
You didn't expect that.
Look how unique I am.
I don't want to say that he's not really Catholic. The whole tone of the show changed at that point. It just didn like a face. Boom. You didn't expect that. Look how unique I am. Like, I don't want to say that he's not really Catholic.
The whole tone of the show changed at that point.
It just didn't make sense.
Like, yeah, because.
Because I was on board with him so much.
I was like, what an interesting guy you are.
And we've been going back and forth for a while.
And then he's like, oh, yes, and I'm Catholic.
And I'm like, horseshit.
That doesn't fucking.
That doesn't fit together.
You're using the European connector and the American.
Like, no, that doesn't work. You can't fit together. You're using the European connector and the American. No, that doesn't work.
You can't be Catholic.
But in his defense, I know there's a huge number of Catholics in St. Louis.
So I know a lot of them.
Most of them don't take it seriously at all.
He seemed to take it seriously.
It's like putting guilt on him.
He is like the Irish Catholic.
He's drinking and beating his wife and then bemoaning it it you know in uh in uh in a confessional he's that guy
he like like or at least he poses as that guy because what i honestly believe is he's probably
straight and uh probably you know doesn't hold many of the beliefs that he touts and he's just
becoming very rich so that's why he's so frustrating is because he does he does unfortunately yeah why
not i don't know what i'm saying unfortunately why would he be so overt about like hitting on
me on the show like he's just bleeding gay for no reason i don't know if
you saw the show he hit on kyle very obviously he's just bleeding gay and it didn't make me
uncomfortable or anything i took i took it as very complimentary even gay people have good eyesight
plays the identity politics game instead of but instead of people on the left playing the muslim
female transgender whatever he plays the you know oh i'm really conservative or really right wing but i'm
also gay how surprising but i'm also this and that's the thing i like i'm okay with almost
anyone's personal belief system but when they start like faking it for money and i suppose on
pka we play shit up sometimes you know for the show yeah but we don't create a persona and then like go on book tours like the level that he does and also i don't think pka does anything to hurt the
country whereas i think milo if you if you were like hey why don't you push this opinion and then
you know it'll hurt the country but you'll make 50 grand he does it every time that's what's so
frustrating about him for me personally is because he does make some very valid points that are just impossible to ignore.
Pointing out some of the hypocrisy on, I'll call it the left because I'm just using his terminology.
But then he goes on these other tangents that I find to be just like so vitriolic and awful and like i imagine being someone that he's talking about listening to
that and then feeling like fuck like there are people that fucking hate me in this country you
know like there are people that like i can't be me in this country without living in fear that
someone's gonna come up and basically try and i feel like he's playing magic cards with his words
the identity politics card sometimes it feels like where he will say something that is objectively offensive not politically incorrect politically incorrect is saying you
know illegal immigrants are a drain on our tax dollars that's politically incorrect saying you're
a dirty jew and i hate you or whatever is is just rude you're just being an asshole and so he will
be needlessly mean and then hide behind the oh you know I called you a faggot, but actually I'm gay.
And so no damage from gay card, no damage from gay cards and skip right to my next turn,
whatever the fuck.
It's like just so you could back it up with your own little.
Another thing he does when you debate with him, he has sources that he'll just, you know,
oh, Rasmussen 1994, whatever.
He'll just whip it out.
But we did it on this show.
But I've got google
right here and at least on one instance i was like what's your source for that a washington post it i
look it up it's the opposite of what he said it was like sometimes when he's quoting sources
at least on our show they were completely from the department of milo's ass and um it's very
difficult to argue with a guy who pulls a source out of his ass because you don't
know wrong department yeah look at trump look at trump during the debates you could just make
stuff up now it's fine yeah i'm surprised someone's gonna get mad at you just make stuff up
he won during this election cycle i felt like fact checking played a big role in it right and the next
day when they determined who won the debate a lot of it had to do with how the fact checking went down.
But in the end, what is probably the biggest bullshitter in the history of modern politics actually won more electoral votes.
So fact checking is not as important as I thought it was. That's a result of a sustained, coordinated, specific attack on the media.
He's been planting the seeds of all media is fake and all media is fake news.
He's been planting these seeds for the last year because the press was giving him all this attention, but they were treating him like a clown.
Because the press was giving him all this attention, but they were treating him like a clown.
And then when his numbers and his political clout started to gain momentum, all of a sudden he used all that clout and directed it like a fucking spear at the media.
And a lot of his followers take him on his word for it and go, today in the press conference, he literally said the words, Russia is fake news.
What the fuck does that mean? Russia is fake news Mm-hmm. What the fuck does that mean?
When he said all negative polls are fake news
Really said that he literally tweeted it. Yeah, and it's fucking like and he has a lot of followers that
Aren't very political. They don't necessarily read a lot of followers that aren't very political.
They don't necessarily read a lot of the news.
And they'll just take his word for it.
And I think a lot of people use that as a justification to be lazy. I think that every citizen here has a responsibility, however small or however big you want to argue it is, has a responsibility to keep themselves informed.
Everybody, including us, though, sometimes falls to confirmation bias.
I know I see Fox News say something I disagree with sometimes
and I think, oh, this is Fox.
You can recognize inherent bias. You can recognize inherent bias.
You can still find 100% credible stories from
CNN, from Fox News,
from Wall Street Journal, from Boston Globe.
You can find credible news.
You can find some stuff that's kind of salacious or maybe a bit exaggerated.
But very rarely do you find an article in CNN that would qualify as fake news.
Like sometimes they have misleading headlines.
But find me a story that's fabricated in cnn are you finding
cnn to slip into the so here let me set this up more properly in my opinion cnn may have been
slightly left but by and large their mission was to be accurate this is for like the last decade
the last three months two months um i feel like their mission has almost been to be the other
fox you know on the other side now they just flat out call trump like i don't know if the other
news agencies really calling him a liar you know and every day one of the big stories coming out
of cnn daily is he lied about this he lied about that this is factually untrue demonstrably untrue
now cnn is invigorated and enthusiastic that's making him a lot of money to be the to be the
counterweight to him yeah but i find their position changing facilitators because you
you're not going to find the equivalent of sean hannity on cnn you're not going to find the
equivalent of bill o'reilly on cnn like, Megyn Kelly before she... I'd argue
Sally Cohen is one. I was going to say Tapper
seems to be doing that on the daily basis.
Sally Cohen is a
gay lesbian. That's redundant.
She's a lesbian Jew
who defends Sharia law on Twitter
all the time. She's a really funny follow.
And it's like, you know, that
is, I think, that
far left of CNN. Like, even on CNN, she's not the norm. But to your point about like the articles and the fake news shit, it is really difficult to like make sure to try in your own head to stay unbiased because it's so easy to be like, oh, I found this fake article on BBC or something.
I don't know, BBC or something.
And then if I see an article in the future that confirms my BBC or that confirms my opinion from the BBC, I'll be like, oh, look at that.
You know, they even you know, they're even a broken clocks right twice a day.
And if I see something from them that I totally hate, I'll be like, oh, well, I don't even have to read that as much because I already know that they posted that fake shit about Trump being a virgin and none of his kids were actually his or whatever.
Bill O'Reilly is to the right.
But when I look at his talking points and watch his stuff,
I don't find him to be factually wrong very often.
And I feel like Tapper is the left version of that.
He's not wrong.
When he's saying that Trump is a liar,
he has literal lies.
I'm pretty sure.
Trump will say it stopped raining when I started talking right it literally started raining when he started talking right he said god cleared the skies for
him trump said that and and they're like that's actually it started raining you know right when
you started going the opposite happened tapper points this stuff out but i feel like he's doing
it in a way that bill o'reilly would do if it was opposite world.
I hope Bill O'Reilly would call out anybody who was lying.
You know what I mean?
I've yet to see Jake Tapper just outright lie.
I've yet to see that once.
That's why I compared it to Bill O'Reilly and not like Glenn Beck or something.
I think you can find some pretty sensational
nonsense coming out of Bill O'Reilly's
camp. I don't think it would be too hard for me to
Merk, I don't know, are you looking
something up there or are you doing something else?
No, I'm looking up fake news from Bill O'Reilly.
I really don't think it would be too hard
to find something really
incredibly stupid coming. But he's not
comparable to a glenn
beck who who can really get out there put his face in cheetos no i would say he's slightly
better than like hannity hannity is just a propaganda piece like he's just a propaganda
machine nobody loves trump as much as hannity loves trump there's a lot of there's no there's
no attempt to hide it there's no subterfuge i feel like hannity's making business decisions
though you know because for all my criticism of Hannity, being stupid is not one of them.
Instead, I think he's hitched onto the Trump train,
and now he's getting popularity.
He's riding that out.
It makes like $20 million a year.
Do you guys want 10 tips from Glenn Beck on how to identify fake news?
Thank you.
I needed this.
Yeah, I do, do actually i want to hear
this so number one gauge your emotional reaction is it strong are you angry are you intensely
hoping that the information turns out to be true or false now he's just begging the question that
was all that number one had no actually this is how you know just how does that have to do with
this you have emotions like a human when you read things?
You know, on very touchy subjects?
What the fuck does that have to do with fake news?
I don't plan to just lie on his website like this hutch.
Let's go to number two.
Yeah, hutch.
Reflect on how you encountered this.
Was it promoted on a website?
Did it show up on a social media feed?
Was it sent to you by someone you know?
This is a whole list of questions. There not a single okay sorry fuck this is stupid check the sources oh i have if you want to figure out like if someone's making you just check the
fucking sources and see what other publications are saying about it can i jump because this is
to me is tremendously interesting i's related like three weeks ago
maybe five weeks ago schumer said do not get into a battle with the intelligence community they have
ways to get at you that you don't even know about right and then shortly later golden shower gate
came out side note about that everything except the peeing has been confirmed that's not true
everything except the peeing has been confirmed that's not true well wait wait wait no it i i read it recently does that mean that like she squatted over they only they only they only
the whole prostitute night part they verified where he was they verified the people that he
met with they verified a lot of parts of that but the whole prostitute peeing obama's room
that is not verified the story that i read about U.S. investigators verifying some of the contents of the dossier
was that it was like a few points that they verified.
There was like 35 pages on that report.
The big dossier.
Maybe you guys should trust Hutch on this.
Yeah, look it up right now.
You should trust Hutch on this.
Yeah, look it up right now.
Anyway, recently the FBI released Trump's apartment race discrimination probe from the 70s.
Yeah, I read it too. This feels political to me.
The FBI is not supposed to be a political organization, but I feel like they're like, oh, Trump, did you have another tweet about us?
Are you fussing about leaks?
We just decided the timing was right for a
1970s race discrimination probe
to get opened up and released.
Fuck them. People have a right to know
about that. Daily
Mail said parts of Trump
dirty dossier. I'm just looking at the headlines.
CNN had the same headline.
Maybe I'm wrong. I'm glad that you're here.
What's the date on yours? Pretty recent?
Six days ago. This is a story that broke last'm glad that you're here. What's the date on yours? Pretty recent? Six days ago.
Yeah, this is a story that broke last week.
But you're right that they did verify
like this person was at this location at that time
lining up with what happened here.
But they didn't corroborate what they called
the salacious claims about pissing and prostituting.
But the guy who posted that, a guy named Christopher Steele, I think.
He was a former MI6 operative.
He has a stellar record
with providing concrete, solid intelligence.
He's in hiding right now.
Yeah, when it came out,
it was like, you know,
anonymous sources, screw that.
Then it becomes not anonymous.
Well, you know, what is all this fake stuff?
Then like piece by piece,
it's getting verified.
I'm not
saying the golden shower gate thing is going to come true do we care uh you know i i people are
being raped at pizza house across this great nation and we're talking about this you're right
no you are absolutely right in the grand scheme of things i don't give a fuck about yeah about
about pissing and prostitutes and stuff like that i i think it if i really don't give a fuck about about about missing and prostitutes and stuff like that. I think if I really don't give a fuck about that, that's not what's important.
His economic ties to Russia are what's important and how it affects how he crafts policy here.
Well, that is truly important and consequential.
What really matters is how is how he crafts policy and what he does, the actions that he has in office.
But I do think that a man's character
guides that, you know?
I do think whether he's able to...
Do you think it's a character flaw
to be peed on by a prostitute?
No, I do think it's a character flaw
to cheat on your wife
and to hire multiple prostitutes.
She's okay with it, though.
I don't know where you're getting that.
You can always go back to that.
She practically separated from him
after the grab her by the pussy thing.
She stopped campaigning for him
and she doesn't live with him now and the two wives before her both you know are gone and because
he cheated on them too right the idea that that melania and him have an understanding yeah i would
put good money on that man he was making 48 grand as a mechanic in south dakota this would not be
something melania was okay with but the fact that he owns
an enormous hotel and she gets the nicest
room in it wherever she wants to go
means that I think she's okay with her old
ass not attractive husband fucking
another girl you think she's upset when
she's like oh you come home and then
you don't want any of these
none of these
don't do me anymore Donald oh come on
Donnie and then it's like,
sorry, it turned into
Quabble Cop pretty quick.
I accidentally gave him
an extra two detotaling
and I got them real high
for the fuck of it.
I reached out to Quabble Cop
after I saw
because someone said like,
so he was talking about you
on PKA and I reached,
I watched the clip
and I reached out to him
and I'm like,
I don't have any memory of that.
I really doubt that
I would have blown you off. And then he said, oh, I think it was at a party or him. I'm like, I don't have any memory of that. I really doubt that I would have blown you off.
And then he said, oh, I think it was at a party.
He said, I think it was at a PAX party or something like that.
If that's true, if I'm at a PAX party, there's a very decent chance that I'm fucking hammered.
Pretty much right away.
Yeah, I figured it was as much.
Or you just didn't recognize him.
He didn't even really say when it was. Yeah, I figured as much. I. Or you just didn't recognize him. He didn't even really say when it was.
I figured as much.
I don't know why I brought that up.
If I'm at a PAX party, I'm freshly out of the octagon.
I understand the character thing,
but if we find out that he gets peed on every other Tuesday,
I wouldn't care.
No, no, it's not that.
If you found out that Obama really likes wearing a g No, no, it's not that. If you don't like Trump,
if you don't know if Obama really likes wearing a gimp suit or something that's not normal.
I bet he'd look good in a gimp suit.
Well, I mean, he's very lithe.
He's very athletic.
He'd look like a superhero.
What would make it consequential
is if they were using that information to blackmail him.
Then it would be consequential.
I don't know if that's true.
I don't even speculate on that.
In fact, when that BuzzFeedfeed article dropped i was really fucking pissed that like even i kind of joked about it but i said like i made like a couple jokes on twitter and that was
it but everybody just focused on that when there was all this other shit over here that it's like
actually important and um could potentially really impact everything I feel like what we're seeing out of the Trump administration,
chaos, lying, etc.,
is the predictable outcome for someone
who doesn't have a strong moral code.
And it's not that I worry about the fact that he got peed on.
Knock yourself out.
You can do anything you want in the bedroom
between two consenting adults.
Allegedly.
Allegedly, thank you.
Yeah, I acted like it happened.
You know, but he could give suit,
whatever. Knock yourself out. That's not my problem.
My problem is that
I don't think this is what Melania signed up for.
I don't think it's what Ivana
signed up for, and I don't think it's what the...
Ivanka's the daughter. Ivanka's his daughter.
You're absolutely right.
Oh, I know.
Yeah, and I don't think... What was the first one's name? Melania? I think it's not oh i know yeah and uh and i don't think what was the
first one's name i'm melania i think it's it was ivana marla maples then melania thank you thank
you so yeah so i don't think these women are signing up for to get cheated on all the time
and i think that's a big part of the way they're totally signing up for it right like maybe the
first wife like back when he was but like melania is a third 100 and she's the third melania number
three yeah i'm with you on signing up for an open relationship where he's like look you're gonna be But Melania is definitely 100%. She's the third, Melania. Number three, yeah.
She's definitely signing up for an open relationship where he's like,
look, you're going to be my wife, but look, you'll never tell McDonald.
Why did she disappear after the grab her by the pussy thing?
She was campaigning for him.
She disappeared after she got caught with the speech at the RNC,
and it was so much like Michelle Obama.
She was gone after that.
Straight up plagiarized.
Can we all agree
that Morgan was such a dick?
She didn't write that speech, just no fucking way.
But still.
She's like, oh yes, I write most
of this. And the truth is
that no, one of your husband's
employees wrote all of this
and then gave it to you. And along the way like maybe a russian hacker sneak snuck in and like put a bunch of
michelle obama's not write it at all if you look at that piece of paper it's a copy paste of michelle
obama's with a couple of adverbs changed if she had written it it'd be in her goofy ass language
with a bunch of umlauts over all the vowels and like you'd know you know there would be a lot of problems with it she'd say America is
greatest country to ever be
in the world like
odd phrasing and stuff like that
you know fucking weird for a first
lady not to move into the White
House that is like
she is the first person to have to
move into a shittier house when they get
elected I'm not
sure that's even true.
Oh, it totally is.
The White House, it's a lot bigger.
There's staff there.
I think it's got a bowling alley.
You've got a private elevator.
There's helicopters on staff for you.
I mean, it's pretty nice.
He has all that stuff in Mar-a-Lago,
but it's like a playground.
It's a resort compared to a government office building
where they handle work and business all day and it's full of stuffy people in suits, right?
Is she in Mar-a-Lago or is she in New York?
Well, they're in Mar-a-Lago right now, but she's spending her time in New York.
She's a Trump Tower kid who's in his best school.
Yeah, she's in Trump Tower.
There's no Rose Garden.
And I know about the school year thing, but like every other president in the history of as far as i know which is a couple of them there's
one more they find there's one more yeah oh was there one other they go to school and locally
sometimes beautiful expensive private schools sometimes not you know there's places for
presidents to live well he's 11 right mid-school year well i mean they all become president at
the same time right then you know i'm talking about the kid. I know Obama had kids and his wife moved in with him.
Can you imagine if Obama would have left his kids in whatever school they were in and taxpayers were spending, what is it, like almost a million dollars a day?
Can you imagine how much he would have been fucking crucified?
Remember they crucified him for his travel?
Like he would go visit bar
dignitaries in India. Donald Trump is
outspending him at an incredible
rate.
He's already spent like 10 million
in the first
month and Obama spent
80 million over fucking
8 years. Obama visited
India and met with heads of state
and they were giving him shit about how much
Air Force One costs. He complained
about Obama golfing. He's been golfing. He's going
again. He's going to Florida again.
He owns his own golf course though, right?
So he's saving money there. I really doubt
that.
Trump has golfed. So Trump
made 11 times he
ripped on Obama for golfing. 11 times.
Out of the first five weekends he spent
three golfing but was it how many of the golfing trips was just him and how many of them was so i
think we have to discount one because he's got the japanese prime minister there and that seemed
pretty important he's got the shinzo abba guy or whatever a lot of those like with any president
a lot of those golfing trips are going to be business related like obama wasn't golfing a lot
i don't care about just all the time being like man i'm just gonna blow off some steam like
the japanese prime minister or somebody from wherever the hell showed up and they go golfing
but you also you can't be you can't rip on on obama for eight years and be like he's golfing
all the goddamn time while entirely ignoring the fact that that's a lot of business related a lot
of the time and rip on him for spending money being like oh fucking he bought michelle obama his wife a cooking class and she has to drive to
philly to do it my god like and then you can't just switch to trump and be like well he's used
to a different standard of living and he'll get it under control you know it's not that much money
he's a billionaire he knows how to handle like it has to i don't know it's just not consistent i'm
glad that you don't defend that, man, because it's –
I'm not asking you to become like a Bernie fan or anything like that,
but I'd like to think that if I had – if my candidate was –
you guys would probably say that Hillary Clinton was just as bad
or obviously worse.
I don't agree, but I'm saying like if my candidate was doing some of the –
the hypocrisy is just stunning and you
don't it there's like five examples every day so you don't even get time to to respond to internal
it's just it's it's um i think that donald trump has a but as far as donald trump's like marriage
though i think that's clearly a marriage of like convenience or opportunity or whatever you want
to call it yeah but not nearly as much as the Clinton's marriage
is because clearly that's not a loving
like emotionally, physically
loving especially relationship.
Those people don't sleep in the same bed.
They don't have sex together.
They don't sleep in the same bed. I find them very parallel to me.
That's what I'm saying, right?
Oh, I misunderstood. I thought you were
saying that Clinton's was much less.
One of them is a political power relationship,
and the other one is I'm a billionaire,
and it's understood that I want a hot lady next to me,
and you know I'm going to bang other people because this has happened before.
This isn't season one of Donald Trump's marriages.
And if I get divorced during the middle of a campaign or a presidential term,
it does not look good.
Someone's going back to Slovenia.
That's what this whole immigration thing is about.
It's a threat toward Melania.
Go ahead, divorce me.
You're out of here.
Melania was touring with him.
She would stand over behind him while he did all the talking and then grab her by the pussy, came out, and she stopped.
That's how I remember it being a big story.
She wasn't a big part of the campaign.. She wasn't a big part of the campaign.
She was never really a big part of the campaign.
She would show up for a photo op
every once in a while, but if you look back
at the rally, she wasn't going with them from rally to rally.
No, she was staying at home.
Well, then what I read was wrong, because I'm pulling a Trump.
You know, that's the information
that was fed to me.
Yeah, I don't think that
they never put her in front of camera
she didn't really do a lot of interviews not a lot of speeches i promise you i cross my heart
hope to die yeah i was following that a lot i wanted to see more from her but then of course
when the plagiarism claims and everything came out after the rnc convention it was clear that
she needed to be pulled out of the lineup that it there was there was going to be no way to put her
back out there repair her make her all shiny There was going to be no way to put her back out there, repair her,
make her all shiny again, and then have her
get some hits from the team.
They put her back out there for like a day or two
when Grabber by the Pussy came out.
She just went like, I just think this is locker room talk.
I do remember that.
The host was
fucking egging
him on.
Dude, if you... The host was trapping my poor, poor him on and yeah. Dude, if you...
The host was trapping my poor, poor husband
on that bus.
Yeah.
I just don't care that much about
their spouse thing.
Like...
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Yeah.
Dude,
we were talking about
that grab her by the pussy thing.
It is so much worse
than people remember,
right?
They think he said,
I grab him by the pussy.
It starts like this. They're talking about Trump trying to fuck married women i moved on her i failed i'll admit it i did
try and fuck her she was married i moved in on her like a bitch but i couldn't get there and she was
married then all of a sudden i see her now she's got big phony tits and everything she totally
changed her look and then the girl in the purple comes around and bush goes your girl's hot as
shit in the purple trump goes whoa whoa i gotta use girl's hot as shit in the purple. Trump goes,
whoa, whoa. I gotta use some
tic-tacs just in case I start kissing her.
You know, I'm automatically attracted to beautiful.
I just start kissing them. It's like a
magnet. Just kiss. I don't even wait.
When you're a star, they let you do it.
You can do anything. Grab them by the pussy.
You can do anything.
People forget the fact that he's like destroying
marriages for fun. He's's destroying marriages for fun.
He's not destroying marriages for fun!
I moved in on her like a bitch.
She was married.
How did you get there?
Really?
How can you not get there?
Where else would you go?
I feel like you're so wrapped up in the angsty of marriage and that sort of thing
that you can't even look at Trump's situation and its own for what it is.
You always apply other moral guidelines to it.
I don't think he ruined anyone's marriage by hitting on a married woman.
How does that—does she go home and go,
a man hit on me, and he's like, bang, punches her in the mouth,
and get out of here?
It's not just that he hit on these women.
He was aggressive and way fucking old.
He claims he was there, yeah.
Well, not just, I'm saying 17 fucking women came forward.
It was hilarious because right after Pussygate,
there was a debate about five days later,
and one of the moderators asked him,
I think it was Anderson Cooper, asked him,
you're bragging about this.
Have you ever done it?
Or were you just lying?
And he said, no, I've never done it.
The very next day, they
just one after the other, after the other,
after the other, after the other.
You can't possibly sit here and tell me
that you think all of them
were making it up.
I mean, that's
insane. You had 50 women lying
about Dr. Cosby, and we
all know that their claims are fraudulent.
Dr. Cosby? Dr. Cliff Huxtable?
Dr. Cosby holds many, many Yeah, Dr. Cuxable.
He holds many, many doctorates that were handed to him.
I think he does have honorary doctorates.
Many doctorates.
A few people took him back, but he has many.
Like maybe a doctorate or more.
Dude, there is so much,
like in all seriousness to what you were saying,
I'm jumping back in because I was getting a drink,
but there is like middle ground between,
oh, obviously all of them are 100% 100 right he did that 17 times and also
saying none of this is true totally facetious like like you have to it is suspicious that it happens
right then perfect time this guy's been in the public eye for decades that doesn't come doesn't
come forward but then at the same time you can't just say that they're all contrived like i bet
there's some truth in there somewhere here's what i'll say i do i know that all of them are being truthful no is it possible that some of
them are lying yeah but um a pattern is emerging or a pattern emerged and and um you can't i had
so many people in um actually hold on to respond to point, I don't think it's suspicious because he has a history of brutally retaliating against anyone who tries to check his power or undermine him in any way. He fucking goes hard, real hard. And there are like several countless documented tales of him basically wrecking people with legal fees just because he can afford it, and they pissed him off.
And so if you're a woman, you don't...
I can understand not wanting to come forward
when he did something highly inappropriate
like fucking touch a girl's pussy on a plane
or pin a People magazine writer up against a wall
when Melania went upstairs to take a nap
when she was pregnant with fucking Baron.
She was out of service.
Jesus Christ.
Strong point, Kyle. Strong point.
There's one in that column.
So if you're looking at this man who you feel
violated you
and all of a sudden he's being
not only groomed for the present
but he's being put in a position where he could very well become the leader of the free world.
I can totally understand waiting until just then to say,
actually, I want to speak up here because I think you all have a right to know what kind of person this guy is.
I don't find that far-fetched at all.
And my complaint has never been like poor Melania,
because I do kind of come on board with it.
By the third time, and forgive me
for generalizing, sometimes European women are more inclined to have open marriages. I base this
on European women I've known, that maybe when he cheats on Melania, it's not really cheating,
right? Maybe it's just the way that they've got their thing out. But these other women,
you know, this defines Trump's character. And a man
with his character is having unsurprising
results in his scandalous
presidency.
How do you make that
equation fit in with Bill Clinton, though?
Because we have a very similar situation, but he was
a good president. He was a scumbag.
He made good decisions as a president, though, despite
his scumbag
side of him.
He made a lot of bad decisions.
No World War III, no meltdown.
His tough-on-crime platform was not
great at all.
Hutch is completely right,
although I don't think that came from a place of
corruption.
It didn't come from a place of corruption. It came from a place of
trying to acquire political capital with other Republicans. I think he was trying to appease, I think
he was trying to reach across the aisle, much like Obama did on some stuff like, you know,
but we talk about immigration now. Obama was real tough on immigration, you know. I don't
agree with everything he did either. But yeah, you know, like he was good for the economy
or whatever, but I don't think he was a perfect president at all.
He's not one of my...
I'm not saying a perfect president.
Kyle brings up a good point.
I feel like Clinton didn't...
He's a scumbag.
He's still capable of being one, though,
despite being a scumbag, perhaps, in his personal life
with women and with these...
I hate to call them minor sexual assaults,
but he certainly never raped anyone, it seems,
or he'd have gotten in trouble for that.
According to one of them, he'd have gotten in trouble for that.
According to one of them, he did.
I don't believe her.
And just going off what Trump said and, like, kind of feeling the vibe in that Billy Bush video, he said it comes off like a douchebag.
But it comes off like two douchebags by themselves alone having a douchebag conversation back and forth, right? He was fucking 60 years old or something like that when he did that. You do that when you're like
20, you know what I mean?
We probably all had conversations
where we talked about sexual exploits
with our friends, but
I never talked quite like that.
Yeah.
I can't imagine.
Absolutely.
If you watch that clip again,
it is so clear that that is a dude who is trying so hard to be like, I am so awesome.
I am so badass that these women love me.
I just walk up to them and they're just moist over the fact that Donald fucking Trump is in the room.
They want me all the time.
Billy Bush, you're talking yourself up, but you're in the presence of a real man now, a real big-handed guy.
Really, Bush?
I love that. It slipped by me.
You got a substantial
buyout, Billy Bush. You got him multiple millions
of dollars for severing your contract.
I felt bad for him because he just
got that. I felt bad for him, too.
When I put myself
in Billy Bush's shoes,
I think he's the host of that crappy daytime show.
Yeah, that horse shit.
If I saw that in the daytime and that's what I was doing,
it would make me feel really guilty.
Is this what I'm doing right now?
Is watching Billy Bush talk about J-Lo's ass or something?
I couldn't do that.
But it felt...
I lost my train of thought.
It was so uncomfortable.
Billy Bush, the buyout, you felt like it was unfortunate.
Oh yeah, I felt like Billy Bush was trying to just fit in with the big star that he has there.
Like, so of course he's going to like, he's going to like go, oh yeah, I grab him by the pussy too, Big Don.
Like, I'm glad you came on today.
This will help the ratings out a lot.
I need to get, I need to hit this on the Nielsen and they're going to give me a big boost this year.
And I can buy my wife that new car if wants. That's what's in Billy Bush's head.
Trump was the brain and Billy Bush was Pinky.
Just bouncing around, yeah boss, whatever you say boss.
The same thing we do every night, Pinky. Try to take over the world.
If you're Billy Bush in that situation
and you're clearly
the lower guy on the totem pole of interest for the company that hired you like trump could have
been saying whatever he wanted like anything crazy like even crazier and i feel like billy
bush would have still had to be like yeah i mean like that is so true that all toothpaste is poison
and it's a way for the government to get in your head or like i feel like he would amp up and agree agree and amplify whatever donald was saying because he felt well
and because it's his job like he couldn't be like donald you know that is sexual assault
fuck you he is not like that but if i was in the bus with trump and i swear to god i believe this
i don't think i would have hit it back quite like billy bush did you know if trump says i can do
anything i want i grab him by the pussy i'd be like you would have just nodded or something like a look
of disapproval you know like you know she was married i tried to fuck her i tried to get with
her oh i need tic tacs in case i start doing this i'd be like murka has a murka has a point here
though because it's because because his job is essentially is to keep the talent happy in that
moment he's not just being a host in that moment like there are people that work in hollywood and all in the industry entertainment
industry all over the world whose job it is just to keep the talent happy no matter how fucking
crazy they're asking you know what i mean like if silo is asking for a brick of cocaine just get
him a brick of cocaine whatever just get get it done it's like get him to the greek you know what
i mean um but yeah i i still think he's a fucking scumbag and like he probably is sort of a douchebag in real life but he was reportedly
really upset when that leaked like he was really really repentant in um in pub in all the interviews
and publications i'd be so upset if i were him that that audio was released because it's like
his show is isn't it like he isn't or at least he's one of the main guys on on e or whatever that fucking show is i don't really know but it seemed like he was extra
i think he was well it seemed like people don't know much about him all i can imagine is like
they released that to hurt donald trump right it's not as if that was like someone going i'm
gonna take billy bush down a peg watch this it was clearly a hit piece on trump but the person
who like released it or sold it to whoever released it or however that that went along had to know billy had to work on the show
with him right and be like uh this is gonna fuck billy over but i don't care like it's i feel
not necessarily it depends on who has access to those archives you know yeah i wonder i wonder
who's the guy right like like you know we always see a woman it's very plausible that it was a
woman we never questioned that though right like? Like, I want to know exactly, specifically, like, who
went into a computer somewhere, like, found this thing and stuck their thumb drive in, took it,
edited it, and then gave it to someone. Who was the individual who did that? Or is it more
malicious than that? Is there a bigger conspiracy at hand? Were there executives sitting around,
well, you know, I had this dossier here and yeah, we have this recording.
I noted this eight years ago that we have on Trump. We could feed that to Diana. She'll want that. Yeah. Be sure she pays us back in turn. The guy that owns all those archives is a Trump
supporter. So I really doubt that it came from him. He's even come out and said, I'm not going
to release him now. There's apparently a lot of private stuff from The Apprentice that's never been released.
And maybe, again, this is just the Woody lens.
I believe there is.
I bet you get Trump talking in private when he doesn't think he's recorded.
And he says some stuff that wouldn't play well on TV.
I guarantee you there's a ton of that shit.
Because if you're a guy who's
a billionaire and you're on top of
the world and you're not thinking,
I'm going to be going to the highest
office in politics in the world,
arguably,
of course you're going to feel comfortable saying whatever the hell
you want as evidenced by that Billy Bush tape.
He never thought, I don't think he was ever concerned
this is going to get out and ruin me.
I don't think it was even a thought in his mind i think i think there's a deflated sense
of himself that he thought he would be a i just don't think he thought about that because he
figured people would just protect him because he's so powerful you know i mean he he really
is a vindictive man very vindictive man the president's ability to get stuff done is often
hinges on his approval ratings right right? You know, Congress follows
presidents with higher approval ratings
more so than ones who people
hate. I wonder how
effective he'll be. You know, it's hard to tell. It's so early.
We're five weeks in. He'll be effective.
And here's why. Because Congress
has had this do-nothing
perceived do-nothing. It's not even perceived.
They've done fucking nothing for
years and years and years log blog, jag, log jamming Obama up. What you're going to see, regardless of who the
madman is in the white house, you're going to see the, the Democrats are going to come to him with
their infrastructure bill. They're going to say, Oh, you want this trillion dollar infrastructure
thing? We have a big list of shit here that we'd love patched up, sir. And we'll sign off on all
of this. And the Republicans are going to say, we'll sign off on all that too.
Just put our pork here and their pork there,
and there's going to be a big infrastructure bill.
The Republicans have stuff they want.
The Dems have stuff they want.
I think the only overlap that he has with the Democrats right now
is respecting Supreme Court decision on gay marriage and infrastructure.
I can't think of like too many other...
Yeah, it is big.
But Republicans
are going to use Donald Trump
to pass as much
as what's on their agenda as possible
until he becomes such a
liability that they will turn on him.
I don't think there's...
Assuming he continues on this...
That's every president, though, right?
I feel like that's every president.
I hope that this guy isn't a madman.
I mean, we're sitting here talking about him
like our president is Kim Jong-un
or something like that.
He's doing crazy stuff,
and he doesn't seem trustworthy often.
His morals are definitely questionable.
I would recommend that you watch
the entire press conference today
because he
I don't think that
I think that man is unhinged.
That's what Tapper
said. Those are his
exact words. I don't know. And it's so crazy
too because then you go on Twitter and then you see the
conservative Twitter sphere and they're like,
man, he really stuck it to the media today.
They see a totally different outcome yeah yeah that's like it's like you see like what we were
talking about the very beginning of the show where you were saying like man the immigration thing and
this and that like it's total like falling apart but it just it's almost like everybody's watching
two different versions of reality simultaneously where depending on what your preconceived notions
are like if you're like me and you kind of like the you know border security thing you're like oh okay at least he's kind of
he went too far and he rolled it out in a really stupid retarded way but at least he's kind of
moving towards something that he said he was going to do and if you're not you're like oh my god it's
even worse than i imagine like it really is like if you go to liberal twitter and you go to
conservative twitter it's like we're watching different movies in the same cinema, not the same one.
Did you like Obama on immigration?
Yeah, I think that Obama got a bad
name on that. He was deporting a lot
of people. He was
doing a lot of things. The thing is that
Trump is talking about taking
the gloves off and just not even being polite about it.
He's talking about hunting people down.
You could almost make a reality show
about Trump's immigration policy.
I keep thinking that he's deporting at a higher rate.
Trump is?
Probably.
But he just deported – there's a kid who's 23 years old in Seattle in a detention center right now who was taken here when he was seven years old and has no criminal history.
You had a woman arrested in court.
ICE members came into a courtroom and arrested her
when she was trying to get a restraining order
against an abusive husband.
The abusive husband tipped the...
I actually read that today. That's fake news.
Are you sure about that?
I'm 100% positive.
So when it got reported that the person who was reporting her was the person she was accusing of domestic violence, that was hearsay.
That was not proven.
They came out later and said that.
Additionally, they left out of that article the fact that this person, she's been convicted of domestic violence, holding a minor.
OK, that's that's good enough.
Contempt or something.
A bad hombre.
This was a person like that.
It was good to go to the go to the Huffington Post article for it.
They don't even mention the fact that she's a convicted criminal.
And it's not that she was being deported
like fuck this person because they're a victim now
purportedly it was more you know you're a
felon
do you support Guadalupe Garcia
being deported? I don't know who that is
can you fill me in? She was the woman
I can't remember where she is she might be in LA but she
was deported because
she had
showed up to her
she had to go once a year and
report to uh ins or ice or i think it was ins or something like that um she was a convicted felon
because she had been using a fake social security number to get work uh but but they had allowed her
to stay for the last eight years as long as she checked in she had no violent criminal history
nothing like that. And then
she showed up to her
appointment this time and they fucking hauled her
off. And she has two...
Was she still using the fake social security
or that had been rectified? I don't believe
so, no. Because they wouldn't have let her stay
if she was... I really doubt that that was
the case. I hope not.
I doubt that that was the case. But no, she...
So technically, yeah, she was a felon.
But she was taken here
into the States when she was, I think,
six or seven years old.
Do you guys think
that we should be...
I think a path of citizenship for...
It's got to be case by case, obviously,
but I think a path of citizenship is
if they're here, if they're productive members
of society, if they're not violent criminals, and a lot of them are paying taxes and paying into the system, then why would we target them?
Why would we target them and not drug dealers or violent offenders?
It's almost like abortion to me.
We should be prioritizing the shitty people first.
Well, I think it sounds like we are. That sounds good.
That sounds good.
All right.
The person,
their rap sheet from 2013,
the person I was talking about,
that fake news thing that,
yeah,
her rap sheet from 2013 was assault,
probation,
violation,
domestic violence, and false imprisonment of a minor.
And that was not mentioned on the Huffman article.
No,
that's,
yeah,
that certainly paints a different story.
With abortion at some point during the term,
it changes from,
you know,
a bundle of cells to a person, right? I don't know
when that time is. It's very complicated. Some might say around six months-ish because people
can get born and survive at that time. Right. I don't know exactly when it happens, but in my
mind, it's somewhere in that ballpark. They're changing from a bundle of cells to a person.
With this immigration thing, it's like, ah, you know, at what point, if they're changing from a bundle of cells to a person with this immigration thing it's like ah
you know at what point if they're brought in when they're seven then you know do they get to become
citizens because really at seven you're not making your own decisions if they're brought in when
they're 17 you know that's somewhat of a different thing maybe i don't know at 18 it is i think or maybe at 18
you're still living with your parents and you're just an interesting thing we're discussing this
but trump hasn't officially taken a stance on it really because we're talking about non-felons
right now we're like hey what about these children who came in these dreamers that obama was giving
this this little uh right to like like hey we'll get you in here but this lady specifically was a
felon now we just outlined that the guadalupe lady, and you know yeah, she was a felon
You know it's so like it you have to find me every other limit is found
Okay, so so that's that's that's definitely one way to look at and I agree
It definitely is a crime, but I think that as far as the policy for what to do with the dreamer
specifically we should look to violent crime and,
uh,
specifically and drug and gang activity.
Well,
I just told you that there's,
there's a 23 year old male in a detention center right now with no criminal
history whatsoever.
I don't have any documentation after being here 15 years though.
14,
right?
I would really like this.
He was,
he was,
he was a dreamer.
He was,
he was,
he registered himself or whatever
this should really be agreed upon and put into law you know this like don't ask don't tell
sort of illegal bullshit that we've been doing for so long uh that's an obama fault
and pre-obama too right like like that's been forever. Well, Obama had that sort of like,
he referred to him as the dreamers, right?
He had sort of this policy of like,
hey, come out of the shadows,
come to us, let us know who you are.
We'll write your name down.
Don't worry, we're not going to do anything with it.
Like you're in the mall, somebody's at a kiosk.
Oh yeah, we need your name and information.
Don't worry, we won't do anything with it.
We'll give it to Trump in four years.
That's what's happening though.
Well, he talked about DACA today in the press conference, and he spoke saying,
we might have to give them some amnesty. We might have to work something out.
But as it's playing out now, you are seeing cases of people being detained or deported
that have no history of criminal violence or anything like that, or any kind of criminality,
besides the fact of being an illegal immigrant.
But if you're taken here when you're seven years older you know we all want clean air we all want
clean clean water none of us want that hard-working person who came in here when they were too young
to even make that decision for themselves but now over the last several years has become a young
adult and is in the workforce or paying their own way through our our education their whole life
their whole life is here.
Or at least we all should
want anyone who
if there's a criminal out there and we have an
excuse to just completely remove
them from our country because this person isn't even supposed
to be here anyway, then yeah, pull the trigger on that
immediately. Oh, he stepped in
gum? That's enough. He shouldn't be here.
He doesn't have a job. He's a drain on
society. He's not paying taxes. He's a criminal. he's working in gangs like send him back to fucking um honduras
and that's very difficult too because like a lot of like that person i was talking about earlier a
lot of these people you deport them and then they come right back and commit more crimes like if
they are an actual they come back oh that should be the hammer should fall hardest when they come
back after we've sent them away once.
That's when we say, uh-oh, you're not leaving this time.
Now you stay.
How does that help us, though?
Because now you're going to end up paying like $120,000 a year to put them in a prison or something.
How does that help you?
Here's my answer to what Hutch said.
You can't just be against what Kyle's for.
You have to be for something better.
We've got a guy who's bad. He's in gangs he's not working etc kyle ships him away comes back he's still bad kyle puts him in jail you need a better idea not just against his idea
well i think i already talked about that i said path to path to citizens give people a clear path
to citizenship.
Kyle specifically said he was in a gang and such. You think a path to
citizenship is still a way to go?
No, I didn't say that.
I'm not saying for violent criminal offenders or drug
dealers, stuff like that. I think obviously
you need to make exceptions.
So what do you do when those guys come back?
I'm not against Kyle.
What can you do?
What can you do?
Try and build a wall, but I don't think that's going to stop them. If you strengthen the actual southern border more,
then those actual deportations are more impactful.
At the very least, if they're going to sneak back in,
it's going to be much more difficult and fewer people will do it.
But you're right, it's a really difficult thing.
You can strengthen that border wall all you want.
People are going to get in, man. You can't
stop it.
I think it bothers people
on a psychological level
just the thought of being powerless.
And so we think of these ideas
like a giant wall because
in that moment we feel like it gives us
some semblance
of control.
It's not going to work. They'll either come
by plane or they'll dig a
fucking tunnel.
Along that entire border...
What was that?
I didn't hear that one.
What the fuck is that?
It's a French seize machine.
You physically can't build a wall
that would stretch across the entire border it's just not possible it's just it is possible we can
rise to the geographically it's impossible you don't want to say that because what trump says
what trump will say if you come with him with that argument is like they say we can't do this we can't
do that the american spirit is strong enough to do anything.
Don't listen to them.
You don't attack it like that.
You want to say, look, here's why it doesn't work.
Most of illegal immigration is coming in on a fucking plane anyway,
and that flies right over your wall.
I think it's 40% coming through.
It'll be most after he puts that wall up.
Yeah, for sure.
He'll stop digging.
I don't know.
It's not a very compelling argument, though, to be like,
people will still find a way in, why bother you know i'm not you know i don't i don't i don't know
if i'm saying that necessarily because like i do believe that a nation has a right to have borders
and be selective about who they let in i'm not i i don't favor open borders i don't even think
hillary favored open borders i think that that quote was taken out of context.
Yeah, it's taken totally out of context.
But yeah,
I'm not saying just let them
all in. I don't think that.
But I'm just saying that it's a
giant waste of taxpayer money to build
a fucking giant wall along the
southern border. I would think there could be
some sort of an invisible wall
like your dog has in the fence.
We just need to get all the Mexicans to wear
an electric collar and we could just put
these sensors under the...
Technology, I think, is really
going to hold off on the wall
and then in like 10 years
you'll have the technological capability to
just send a fleet of drones
to constantly surveil what's going on.
We'll have that whole wall built out of solar
panels in like four years.
Think about that. Oh my god!
No one could get upset.
This is perfect. Call the president.
The asshole will make it
out of coal. I guarantee it.
We just pile up mountains of coal.
The wall has caught fire.
The wall has now
been burning for eight years.
That's reaching across the aisle, Merk.
I like your thinking there.
But seriously, we're going to have a lot of technology.
I mean, the world is changing technologically so fast right now, man.
It's so fast.
It's making my mind spin.
They have drones now, passenger drones.
They're going to be introducing them in China.
You just get in a drone, and it flies you somewhere.
Someone just did that, except they're not flying.
They're like 285-pound, one-man, I think three-wheeled little cars.
One American.
Chinese.
They hold you in your luggage, and I want to say they're in the Middle East,
like Saudi Arabia, but I could be off.
And they just legalized them.
There's no driver or anything.
You just sit in it and they take you to where you want to go.
Cool.
Have you guys been in a self-driving car yet?
No.
You have?
No, I haven't.
What is it?
What was the experience like?
No, my girlfriend rented me a Tesla.
It was really sweet of her.
I'm really fascinated with Teslas and self-driving cars.
One day she just showed up.
There was a Tesla outside and I was like,
you're fucking joking me.
I took it around and it drove me around.
Were you nervous a little bit?
A little bit. Take control.
They tell you to keep your hands close to the wheel and if you leave them away
from the wheel it'll give you like an audio alert to get them closer but uh yeah you're driving on
the freeway i remember i clicked it on and it was just like wow and then we come around a corner on
the freeway or not a corner um a turn a little bit a curve and there was a little bit of traffic
build up and as we was like hit the brake hit the brake i'm I'm like, I'm not doing it. I'm going to trust.
I'm going to put my trust in this car.
And sure enough, I'll tell you what, though.
It does wait until you're really close to apply the brake.
But it's incredible.
If a car gets too close to you on the left, it'll give you an audio alert.
It'll automatically move out of the way.
It uses, I think, sound waves, something like sonar.
Not sonar. Is that underwater? sonar not sonar is that under
underwater radar just means sound it could be above water okay yeah they use they use
sonar technology so it can actually see what the car in front of the car that you're
um following so if they stop it'll stop before the car in front of you even stops
and so it brings up all these interesting um philosophical discussions about
how safe is it going to be for human beings to be allowed to drive a car when computers can do it so
much better than we will and um i'm all for it like i'm i'm like let skynet take over i don't
think humans should be driving they do it way better than we do that's what the data tells us
right now i so i'm all for it too but i'm surprised everybody else is i i thought there'd be a real resistance like i ain't like no computer
in my universe you know the people that i see and talk to the people that like classic cars
and stuff like that well okay i think classic cars are gonna stick people who like driving
people who like driving but i feel like in. But I feel like, in general,
no one is saying,
I don't want to be on the road with those cotton-picking automatic cars.
They're going to kill me.
No.
Everyone is like,
that texting girl is going to kill me.
The automatic car stops all the time.
Apparently, they do a good job with pedestrians,
motorcycles,
all those corner cases that you might think
they could mess up on.
And I just, like GMO,
Europe is not down with modified fruit
and shit like that.
And to me, I'm like, are they right?
Or are they just kind of anti-future?
But cars, it seems like everyone is okay
with driverless cars.
Everyone can't wait.
When we were in Denver, we rented a Tahoe, and it's certainly nothing like a Tesla,
but it does have a few little abilities.
So for one thing, if it senses that you're drifting out of your lane, it will fight you.
It will fight you.
And I'm just like, no, I do want to fucking change lanes.
I do.
Any ass vibrations?
There are ass vibrations.
If there is a problem on your right or your
left it'll vibrate that ass cheek and i'm like oh what is it oh okay don't steer into that guy
and then like if it thinks that i'm gonna rear end somebody first it starts vibrating and flashing
lights and then i think it literally braked me at one point because i was just i was like let's see
what'll happen it was uh they vibrate your ass so hard like if in it if you're a lady with a
ass vibrating tahoe take it through a car wash i drove a kia that had similar thing to kyle
and uh it was you know how it like fights you if you use your turn signal it lets you turn
so i figured yeah and um the the thing about not hitting someone, that was active, her cruise control, I think it would just turn off and hit the brakes.
You know, it wouldn't keep up with them or anything.
But it was really cool.
And, like, Hope, I don't know if she drove it or just, like, experienced it, but she's like, I want that in my car.
You know, I could use all these assistance.
She didn't get it, but.
We just got a real thick car.
That's it.
We just got a car with air.
It literally has like 19 airbags or 22 airbags.
Honey, forget about trying to prevent the eventual crash.
We're going to deal with the crash that's coming.
Okay?
You don't need sensors.
You need airbags.
My daughter drives a Volvo.
You got your helmet on?
She calls you.
She's driving.
Do you have your helmet on?
What do you guys think of a basic universal income?
The idea of a basic universal income?
It's definitely the future, right?
The core of me as a capitalist says,
ah, that sounds terrible, but with automation
and with the population, it's the future
unless we have a famine or a global war
in the next 10 or 20 years, right?
It just has to be.
It really does, because how many millions of Americans are going to be out of work in the next 10 or 20 years right just has to be it really does because i mean how many millions
of americans are going to be out of work in the next 20 years i mean it's a scary number when you
think about depends how we count i don't know they make the industrial revolution argument where
they're like you know the industrial revolution happened and everyone was saying you know people
are going to be out of work there and then just new jobs occurred but that can't just happen
ad infinitum happen ad infinitum
or ad infinitum or whatever. Eventually
we're going to get to a point where there really isn't that much
else to do it seems, you know?
We've all seen the CPG Grey video on this.
In the future we added a lever to make
work. So originally
we were all lifting one big rock together
adding pulleys and levers and the
manpower goes down because of the expertise.
This time around it's different. No, Lars Law is apower goes down because this time around it's different
no lord's law is a son of a bitch this time it's different this time this time all of a sudden the
machines can repair themselves and they don't need operators anymore like pretty soon having a human
interact with your machine that builds cars is going to be the real problem and see like what
happened down in bay three ah a person snuck in there and started tinkering with the car-making bot,
and it painted them all silver.
Of course, it fixed it right after in 30 seconds.
Only a 30-second delay today.
99% optimal production.
And that's a robot talking.
The question is, is this time different?
Because throughout all of human history, every time automation comes around,
it's always been like, all right,
so now we don't need 30 people in a typing pool anymore
because we have a copy machine.
And there's always been new jobs coming up,
but now it's, is this time different?
Well, I think we're finally at that critical mass moment
in our technological history as a species and think we're finally at that critical mass moment in in in our technological history as
a species and and and how we're progressing where um this idea of moore's law how computers uh
basically double every year and a half in efficiency and whatnot we we have now reached
a point where they're going to have robots delivering our packages for us they have
that like the the biggest priority in China right now is developing,
like, what I read somewhere, I think,
was that developing the capability
for robots to do just household chores.
If they can do a household chore,
just imagine the countless other things.
Take your jobs!
Yeah, like, birds.
Household chores sound somewhat complicated, too, right?
Like, the robots that do stuff now are,
I say robots, I can't stop.
Anyway, the robots that do things now,
they do real simple things.
Take a screw from this pile, put it in this hole,
repeat that all day long.
Household chores, like you're going to randomly find
where I left my socks and get them, you know, washed.
Like you're going to pick up my dishes around me.
That seems like a task
that's just so varied that it's a tough nut to crack all i think basically it's not hard to
imagine a future where all basically all retail work will be automated i don't think that's going
to happen in five years maybe not even 10 years or 15 years but it's coming and it's in it's in
sight now we used to talk about self-driving cars as if
it was like a, wouldn't that
be cool? It's literally happening.
We're there now.
It's not just happening, but didn't you
expect when the self-driving cars
finally came along that we'd be hearing about crashes
left and right, and like 30 of
them would burst into flames, and then
20 would, like the software
wouldn't know that there was
a lake there and it would just be driving children into the water and people would be weaponizing
them but no humanity has done like a good thing here and it seems like that only good people are
operating them everyone loves them and every time you hear about an incident it immediately goes to
user error or alcohol or bullshit yeah there was a guy maybe yeah well the one that i'm talking about i
don't know if i didn't hear that he was drinking but the one that i read about was uh it had the
tesla had a hard time seeing what was in front of it because of uh the sun glare bouncing off of a
white car and it was just it made it it couldn't see this giant truck that was pulling out in front
of it and so the car just car just went right underneath the truck.
That sucks.
I think the one Kyle and I are talking about,
a guy was saying that his daughter
got into an accident in her Tesla
because of its rocket ship-like acceleration.
Oh, it's so fast.
Turns out she was drinking.
It is the fastest production fucking car in acceleration.
Don't show the fans this link I'm about
to send you, but this is a
robot.
Oh dear.
See, that's a robot.
That's funny.
Let me do an ad
read here for you.
Yeah, I linked Woody to
an enormous, fuckable, vibrating
woman's ass.
It's like the ass cheeks and the vagina.
You know what's back there.
You've probably been on the internet before.
So that is a robot.
The past few months, we've been working a lot with movement watches.
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I just saw Chiz the other day rocking his Movement Watch.
I was talking to him.
I'm sorry.
I thought there was a... I was talking to him i'm sorry i thought there was i was talking to
hutch before the show and he's like you know i see people with no watches or one watch and they
look like fucking peasants to me and i don't like it yes no i didn't say i have a watch my god i
never wear it hutch didn't say that but yeah they're excellent watches um they woody always
talks about they have a bit of heft to them that feels nice. You don't
forget you're wearing that watch and you'll notice if you
don't put it on in the morning. I like
their watches. They're really thin.
They're sleek. They're not
overstated, which is something I really like.
And they do go well with a lot of different outfits.
They're currently fashionable.
They're what you're looking for now.
I guess I started wearing watches when I was a teenager
and sometimes I
look at my old watches and I'm like, these things look like shit.
They're tiny, they're slim,
they're not what people like anymore.
But movement is up to date.
Yeah. Let me tell everyone about Blue Apron
and then Taylor will probably be back
by then. Blue Apron's mission.
I'm going to start cooking my Blue Apron dish at
7, by the way. So that's in 30
minutes. That will be delicious.
I want to know which one you've got in just a moment.
Blue Apron's mission, you see, is to make incredible
home cooking accessible to everyone.
Blue Apron knows that when you cook with incredible ingredients,
you make incredible meals. So, they set the highest
quality standards for their community of artisanal
suppliers, family-run farms, fisheries,
and ranchers. It's easy. Each meal
comes with a step-by-step, easy-to-follow recipe card,
pre-portioned ingredients, and can be prepared in 40 minutes or less.
And it's flexible.
You can customize your recipes each week based on your preference.
Choose delivery options to fit your needs.
There's no weekly commitment, so you only get deliveries when you want them.
Some of my favorite meals have included, or excuse me,
some of the meals available in February include the cashew chicken stir-fry with,
or excuse me, some of the meals available in February include the cashew chicken stir fry with, that's got to be tangy mandarins and jasmine rice,
and udon noodle soup with miso and soft-boiled eggs.
Check out this week's menu and get your first three meals free with free shipping
by going to blueapron.com slash painkiller.
You will love how good it feels and tastes to create incredible home-cooked meals with Blue Apron.
So don't wait. That's blueapron.com slash painkiller, Blue Apron, a better way to cook.
We've been over it before, but Blue Apron really does make cooking a really nice, fancy meal that will impress someone foolproof. You've got recipe cards that's really step-by-step,
and all the ingredients are pre-portioned. You don't have more or less than you need.
It's a good service. I've learned how to – they've taught me how to cook, man.
They're not paying me to say this on your show,
but I did not know how to cook before last year.
And now, like, if you give me a recipe, I think I could confidently get it done.
I was going to say, it's a neat service for our demo,
who I think of as young guys, maybe just a little younger than Hutch even,
getting started on living on their own.
And, yeah, it'll help you build this skill.
It'll add recipes to your repertoire.
Cheaper than takeout for the most part.
Cheaper than takeout for the most part.
Beats going to the Olive Garden or whatever. You'd pay $40
for a plate that you'd pay $10
here for.
You tweeted something recently about a meal
that you were doing before
and after. Was that just one that you made we're doing like before and after is that
just one that you made no no that was blue apron that was i i saw it and i thought it was blue
apron because i saw the chicken breasts and i was like that looks like those like almost perfect
like in a lab chicken breasts well we actually we had to throw the blue apron chicken breast out so
we had to get those ones from the because we because oh well the chicken looks great yeah yeah i got i got that that chicken was from safeway but um yeah they make it fucking super
easy man it's like the first few times you do it if you have no experience you might it might be
kind of rocky kind of figuring out what they're saying like i don't even know what a zester was
like the fuck is lemon zest like the little things like that that you get kind of hung up on.
No, it didn't to answer your question.
Mine always did.
Can I choose next topic?
Yeah, sure.
We should talk about PewDiePie before I take off.
PewDiePie.
Oh, you should.
Okay.
That works.
You are the host.
I don't know why I said that. No, no.
I like your idea.
So, Hutch, why don't you take over and lay out the storyline for people who don't know.
Paint a picture.
So, yeah, he basically found this service called Fiverr.
And I don't know too much about the service, but apparently you can just pay five bucks to get people to do shit.
If anybody knows more than I do, then feel free to jump in.
I've heard the same.
more than I do, then feel free to jump in.
I've heard the same.
He wanted to test the boundaries of how far he could get people to go,
and he ended up paying these two guys in India, if I'm correct,
to hold up a sign that said,
Death to all Jews, and then laugh about it.
And I think there was one that said,
Hitler did nothing wrong, which is kind of like an internet meme.
I didn't see that one. I read internet meme. I didn't see that one.
I read about it.
I didn't see it myself.
Usually the Empire did nothing wrong, but Hitler did nothing wrong. And remember, that's the most famous person on the history of the internet.
I could be wrong, but I read it.
So Wall Street Journal runs a story a few days ago,
and I guess they had approached Disney and YouTube about it before
they ran it saying do you want to comment on it
before we run it and they saw
that they were running it and they went through
his videos so someone watched like thousands
of his videos so they went through his videos
and they found I think like seven
other examples where he
used imagery
or some kind of audio clip
or just saying the word Nazi but then there was also he made a response I guess there was one where he'd use imagery or uh some kind of audio clip uh or just saying the word
nazi but then there was also he made a response video today i guess there was one where he was
doing that with his hand and they just they considered that as part yeah yeah so so basically
he comes out today and he basically acknowledged what he's not felix is not a stupid guy and like
i i i pretty much thought that he was going to do this as soon as it happened but
he said he understands why youtube and disney did what they did he totally he's not dumb he
understands that they have to have a brand that they need to protect uh but he also didn't
appreciate uh the headlines like if you look on the internet right now just type pewdiepie nazi
some of the headlines you'll
see are fucking ridiculous.
So I think there's two sides of this
coin where it's like, I don't think...
I didn't really like that joke.
He will profit from this. He's too big
not to profit from this. He's getting...
More people are learning about who PewDiePie is
today than ever would have otherwise.
And all of the people who know who he is,
all of them, 100,000%,
are like, look how our boy is being mistreated
by that lying, fake news mainstream media.
Like, they got Trump in one ear
telling him the news is fake,
and they got PewDiePie in the other
telling him the same thing.
Perfect combination.
PewDiePie is going to do well.
That's what's going to happen here.
Oh, did it really?
Interesting. One of the first things, because I just Googled PewDiePie is going to do well. That's what's going to happen here. Oh, did it really? Interesting.
One of the first things, because I just googled PewDiePie Nazi just to see it.
Is YouTube sensation PewDiePie really a Nazi?
Yeah, yeah.
It's from Salon.
It's like, no, of course he's not.
Of course he's not.
There's a million headlines like that, and it's fucking stupid.
At the same time, I do not think that joke was...
I can appreciate what he was trying to do, but I didn't like that joke.
He's free to do it. He's free to say it.
He's free to make these jokes, but he's not free from the consequences.
And he understands that.
He knows.
Did it offend you?
I thought a lot of these jokes were in line with like common internet jokes.
Like Hitler did nothing wrong is something I've heard over a hundred times.
It was a Mountain Dew flavor.
Oh yeah,
that's right.
Yeah.
They asked Hitler did nothing wrong or whatever it was.
It was a boat.
They held a vote and the internet was able to make that the top voted flavor.
Do you not know this story, Hutch?
Like Bodie McBoatface?
Like Bodie McBoatface, except 4chan took over a Mountain Dew flavor list
and it won not by a little bit.
It was like you had to go through the top 30 to find one that wasn't Hitler related.
So they just ruin online contests.
And I think that's funny because the reason that they're picking the Hitler thing is because it's so over the top, so ridiculous that they know that that poor guy who organized it at Mountain Dew is like, oh, god damn it.
How did we not see this coming?
Fuck, we can't use any of this.
I don't know.
It's just funny. because the whole joke is like pushing it to the like the obscene ridiculous limit of like
obviously you're not trying to start a grassroots nazi movement in india with these two uh barely
clad gentlemen holding up the sign like you know like he's doing it because it's like this is funny
it's two people who probably don't give a fuck about what sign it is they would hold up any sign
just for five bucks no emotion on their face and i really think that that's that's like the biggest problem that i had with it because at what at what point
does an obscenely rich man paying two presumably poor people five dollars to hold up a sign that's
like all right hang on they can't paint them as the victims. Hold on. As long as it is a consensual transaction.
I got five bucks.
If it's consensual, $5 for the sign, then they weren't forced into it.
Their arms weren't twisted.
No, no, no.
I'm not saying that they were forced into it.
I'm not saying that they're victims.
I just found it on the whole to be not something that I was exploitive. The thing that I found, my takeaway from it was, my takeaway from it was
so much of it was internet meme
that I was hardened
to that particular stuff, right?
Like Hitler does nothing wrong.
I've heard it a hundred times.
I feel like what's happening
is the Wall Street Journal
isn't like 4chan savvy.
They don't know it's a running joke.
Who is 4chan?
They take it in a very different way.
The hacker known as 4chan.
So they take it a different way.
If PewDiePie had read a thing claiming to be a Navy SEAL who had sniped 300 people or whatever the rest of that copypasta is,
and Wall Street Journal reports on him doing – what do they call it?
Thank you.
Stolen Valor.
Then I'm like ah wall street journal
you just don't know this joke right that's how i took the hitler stuff like oh you just don't know
this how you should take it he's he's probably doing it on a live stream i would imagine right
oh no no it was for a video for a video that's okay i'm fine with that so he's like cherry
picking his best that's for i like this website what's it called fiverr fiverr so so there so. So walk me through this just a bit maybe if you know something about it.
So you're telling me there are individuals on this website who are like, hey, I'm looking to make $5.
And there are other individuals who are like, hey, I got a little cash on hand.
And they get together and the payers go the takers into doing things for $5.
How does it work? What's the structure?
I don't know, but
from what PewDiePie's video said today,
that's kind of the gist of it.
I want to get on board with this.
Could we influence random people
across the world to do awful things?
Because I fucking love that.
We absolutely can.
And we should.
Finally, I'm used to this Patreon money
we've been swimming in.
You should have them do the Jesse Ventura copypasta, which is And we should. Yeah, finally a use for this Patreon money we've been swimming in.
You should have them do the Jesse Ventura copypasta,
which is the 300 kills, you know, of, you know,
I'm a Marine and I have over 300 confirmed kills or whatever the fuck it would be.
But sorry, I stepped on you, Hutch.
No, no, no, that's all right.
I was just going to say, like, when I watched it,
I didn't think to myself, or when I heard about it,
I didn't think to myself, wow, PewDiePie is a fucking racist, or that's racist.
That's not where my mind went with it.
So it wasn't like I was offended on a level of like, I watched H3H3's video where he talked about being a Jew and watching a video like that, and him not being offended, and people shouldn't sign up to be offended for other people.
So that's certainly not my intention, and that's not how I felt about it
when I heard about what he did.
But it just felt like
you can joke about anything
and anything can be funny.
And some people found that funny.
I didn't think that was funny.
I think that there are better ways
to make that point.
Do I think like,
I don't know if he necessarily deserves having his show canceled,
which I guess hundreds of people worked on or something like that.
He said a hundred.
A big drop from his MCM.
But at the same time, he also acknowledged they were kind of backed into a corner.
What else were they going to do but drop me?
And he expressed regret about the joke.
And he said, I wish I wouldn't have done it
or I wish I would have done something different or something.
I think it's horse shit.
I hope that someone else pays him more money, and this year he makes $23 million instead of only $17 million.
I think he will come out, I think, better off for this in terms of publicity.
Oh, he will, yeah.
Anybody who's feeling sorry for PewDiePie or is outraged at this, just don't worry.
He's smart enough to realize that this is horse shit and that he's – and I'm sure there are people around him being like, ah, don't worry about this.
This is going to blow over.
I watched it.
This isn't a Mel Gibson situation.
You're going to make – you're going to be just fine next year.
When I was watching PewDiePie, like my impression of him is mannerisms, et cetera.
I was like, ah, yeah, yeah, I've been there.
Now, not at his level wall street journal hasn't you know taken shots at me but i have been where it felt like i was
the center of youtube's hate you know remember the video bumping thing hutch yeah i don't remember
how upset a number of people were about that yeah i don't think I really talked to animals I woke
up one day and 400,000 people hated me and like all my videos where everyone is
making videos about it you know and and like I had so much the guy that made the
video bumped all his videos for like a year decided to stop and then made a
video about me right who made the video I don't even know. I don't think he even does YouTube anymore.
His name is Ukrainian Limbs.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, that's a name I haven't thought about in a while.
Anyway, that guy bumped all his videos for like, I don't know,
a year or something like that,
and then made an anti-video bumping thing just to get me, right?
And he showed my video getting bumped,
and it was actually me and
another guy's video got bumped but everyone just talked about me and uh it was hard it seemed like
everywhere i went i couldn't like go on the internet without seeing people talk about me
that's what i was gonna say was that i don't think pewdiepie is too concerned about the lack of or
the loss of of revenue i if i think, however, if I was in his
shoes, that would be difficult for anyone.
I don't care what kind of
an elevated status you have.
That's going to sting when you have that many
eyes on you. Even if you know that
I'm not a racist to my core.
I'm not a hateful person.
They're not going to convince me that I'm a racist.
And you're the fucking number one
most subscribed person on YouTube,
it's still going to be like,
that would make my stomach turn in knots
if something like that happened to me.
Sometimes they're like,
ah, dude, what does he care?
He has $20 million.
I made that up, but whatever.
He's valued at like over $120 million.
Okay, so what does he care?
He has $120 million.
No, I promise you like even
if you're pewdiepie or mel gibson or kramer or whoever it is that you are when you're the center
of a of a hate tornado like it sucks more than you might guess but people like what you're saying
before it's going to help them out overall i think like i had no opinion on pewdiepie at all i'm not
in his demos so i didn't watch his shit but just from the little clips of like the the jokes from Fiverr. I laughed at that
I thought that was funny and I'm like oh this guy isn't as much of a
Panders to six and seven year olds as I thought which is kind of like what you assume
And so now people from the get-go anytime. There's another you know
Youtuber attacked by the mainstream media. They're like this is just the PewDiePie thing all over again
Like this is happened to PewDiePie like a over again like this has happened to PewDiePie
like a half a dozen times or more
it hasn't been the experience
not on this level though
okay
one even though this probably helps PewDiePie
I agree with Taylor
I bet if he could like go back in time
and make it never happen he'd pick that
ten times out of ten
and the other,
you were saying like, oh, he doesn't just tailor to six-year-olds, et cetera. He has done that brilliantly. PewDiePie's videos were not my cup of tea three years ago, right? Watching scary or
playing scary games and overreacting and stuff like that. Like, you know, I'm not saying they're
bad videos. I'm saying I'm not his demo. When someone's really popular and I hate their stuff,
that just means it's not for me, right? Clearly it's good. The people have voted.
But he's transitioned, man. Like his subscriber base has aged and brilliantly, much better than
me, he's modified his content to fit them. So you can watch PewDiePie from the time you're like,
I'm making up numbers, 12 to 20 20 and right now he does like insightful thoughtful
stuff and suddenly i become his demo and i think that's pretty neat yeah yeah yeah no he's he's
he's turned a corner like i hadn't watched him for a couple years and then i watched a few videos
of his recently and you can tell that he's um actually putting some thought into what he's
doing and it seems like he has a goal with respect to using his influence.
You can make an argument that maybe he doesn't always use it the best way,
and that really depends on who you talk to.
But I do appreciate the fact that he didn't get complacent,
and he's actually trying to accomplish something.
That would be really cool if he could transition from the scary game over reactions
to something like George Carorge carlin and like his social commentary and and and and the sort of
insight that that can provide someone um yeah i respect the fact that he kind of lays it out there
on the line right now for sure yep yep yep he's like i i'm just on his vid stats page obviously
it's hard to tell the subscriber impact because they do that thing where they randomly get rid of
100,000 of them and then they come back.
But even just normal days,
he's getting like 9 to
12 million views a day.
A day.
That's insane.
Is there anybody who's even close to that on YouTube?
I don't know.
Who's not one of those Vivo channels or something?
Well, Quabalcop did 130 million last month. So, yeah, pretty close. I think he's number one. Who's not one of those like Vivo channels or something? Well, Quabocop did $130 million last month.
So yeah, pretty close.
That's like half.
That's not even half of QTBot.
That's his best ever, but yeah.
Yeah, but it's close.
I wonder what motivates him.
I've always found this to be interesting, right?
At Cisco, people's stock options did so well.
There were like management seminars and stuff
on how to motivate people who didn't need money.
You know, like how do you get a guy to keep working,
especially over time and like really hard
when he's got like a couple million in his pocket
and he has fuck you money, right?
PewDiePie can live an amazing lifestyle forever.
And why does he keep making daily videos or more?
I mean, he's just striking while the iron's hot, probably.
But at $120 million, if I had $120 million, I'll tell you what I'd do.
I'd buy a motorcycle and a paramotor and fuck about daily.
That would be what I would do.
But if you knew that you could sit down and make... You only need $2 million for that. If you knew you could sit down and make about daily. That would be what I would do. But if you knew that you could sit down...
You only need two million for that.
If you knew you could sit down and make another hundred grand
or 50 grand or whatever it is,
it would pain you.
Like, I know you.
It would pain you to sit there and be like,
I'm going to go out and ride my motorcycle.
Or you could make two videos today
and make enough to buy 10 of those motorcycles.
You are kind of right. People get get addicted to more and their line moves their their line moves as as their income
income threshold i talk like i semi-retired voluntarily but the truth is you know woody
craft was on the decline and mojang was you know not letting servers sell the things they used to
sell and when i changed from YouTube to WoodyCraft,
WoodyGamerTag was kind of on the decline.
And that's why I went to Minecraft.
So it's not as if I'm doing what I say I would do, which is like,
you know what? That's enough. Time to
go.
Instead, it was like, alright, time to transition
or stop or whatever. I didn't just
leave a lot of cash on the table.
I think we all we all we all tell
ourselves or we all told ourselves you know when when we were younger like if i had a million
dollars i would just i'd be good but really like you're you're uh the line it's like a drug man
it's like it doesn't get you high like it used to like the thought of you know right you get that
i remember i remember when i when i got my first payment when i got my first payment from machinima i was like fucking daddy warbucks over here
you kidding me i'm good and then you know now that number doesn't excite you no
would be very panicked or upset and be like what the fuck yeah definitely yeah i i this is
some comedian said it but he was like
if bill gates woke up tomorrow with oprah money he'd jump out a window that's really funny i never
put it in my head like that that if he woke up and was twice as rich as oprah he'd be having like
a shaky breakfast like calamitous oh my god oh my godinda, what the fuck are we going to do? Shut down the foundation.
Cut the foundation. Cut it.
Fuck malaria.
Fuck AIDS.
The new tagline for the Bill and Melinda Clinton Foundation
or Bill and Melinda Gates
Foundation is just, you've had your fill.
Donate here.
They start collecting money instead of
giving it away.
Selling water. donate here they start collecting money instead of giving it away selling water what do you guys think about
if I could
just change topics real quick
Drifter made a video
today because I posted something
where there was a lawmaker I think in Alabama
that's trying to pass a bill
that would essentially decriminalize
any accidental injury or death
that would result from hitting a protester with your car if they're blocking traffic.
Did you hear about that?
Accidentally hitting a protester.
But the challenge is accidentally hitting a protester.
It doesn't mean you can mow a crowd down that's quite obviously standing there.
Well, I accidentally ran into him, and then I accidentally backed up,
and then I accidentally went forward, and then I accidentally went forward,
and I accidentally backed up. As you can imagine,
after I impacted Mr. Jones
the first time, I wanted to see
what that big bump was, so I put
her in reverse.
We already
have criminal liability laws that
cover accidental
deaths, so the point of the bill,
oh, I'm sorry, this was in South Dakota, I think. Where's this Dakota Access
Pipeline? Is that South Dakota or North Dakota?
I think it's one of them.
It's in that state, and I think it was done
in response to that.
And the
bill's author even said its intention
was to shift the burden of proof
to the protester instead
of the driver. So the protester has to prove that it was intentional
rather than the driver has to prove it.
It should be.
Well, anyways, so Drifter made a video,
and I don't know if it's just kids.
I have to assume a lot of them are just kids,
but there were so many people that were like,
if they're in the way, fuck them.
I'm running them over.
I don't know if they're shitposting or they actually believe it but it's so crazy to me
that in 2017
protests is a really fundamental part
of this country it's what
makes this country great in my mind
and
I don't necessarily think that
blocking highways or roads is
the best way to get your point across but to
seriously like hop in my mentions
and advocate murder
or potential murder
but I don't feel bad when they
die because they were blocking
a highway that ambulance
could have been for me that you're
slowing down or let's forget about the ambulance
people use that example but there's not a single
time that anyone's died
there's been plenty of ambulances stopped
I don't know if people have died
but you don't need someone people have died, but it's certainly...
But you don't need someone to start seeing
the problem. But for the most part,
when there's ambulances, they let them through.
You don't see that making headlines, though.
And what about the things other than ambulances
they slow down? What if they're slowing down some medicine?
What if they're slowing down a guy who's driving
a Ford Taurus with an organ in it?
It's just not a good idea to shut down our
highways and our
traffic systems because people's lives
are dependent on them. Again, I tend to
agree with you there, but I think you're cherry-picking
the most extreme
possible hypothetical to make your point
and really the point should be it's never
okay to fucking murder someone.
You know what I mean?
I don't know if it's never okay
to murder someone because if someone's trying to come at you, but it's never okay to advocate running someone over with your fucking car.
Not on purpose.
Not on purpose, no. The only time I would do it...
An accident's an accident. What are you going to do?
That's what the lawmaker said. That's what his bill is called.
An accident.
I wish I understood the laws that were there beforehand. That's what I want to know. It's an accident. I wish I understood the laws
that were there beforehand. That's what I
want to know. Was there something that needed to be fixed?
For me, there's this parallel
to hate crimes. I very much hate
hate crime bills because they're
already crime bills. Why double down
when it's like a black
and a white guy or an Asian and a
black guy? I don't care what they are. But
why are the rules different for your motivations?
All crimes are hate crimes.
If I beat some guy up and he's also white,
I get all scot-free as opposed to if he's black.
I think that changing the law
based on why you're so upset is silly.
And circling back to this thing
where you can apparently accidentally hit protesters
what was it like before because i'm guessing you probably got off scot-free for accidentally
hitting people before you know if i stand in the road in the dark at night it's redundant
and i hit a guy what happened well well they they have laws that help help us understand i mean it depends on
whether or not criminal negligence was involved if it was an accident because there was poor
lighting or whatever obviously that's that's where i'm at what if the guy's dressed darkly
um and he's standing in an area that's not well lit and i hit him and i'm like i'm so sorry i i
never thought someone was going to be standing in i-85. I was going 70 miles an hour and bam.
Well, the author of the bill even said it's basically like a giant fuck you to protesters.
Like if you're going to block the road, then I'm going to make it easier for people to not serve jail time.
What I'm saying in a long-winded way is my opinion on the bill is dependent on the change that it enacts.
Honestly, it seems like a bill where it's like,
hey, do your protesting not on the road.
Don't protest in the road,
because we're now making it so that it's going to be harder
for you to prove that someone did it maliciously.
Like, I would never run through someone.
That's awful.
He's saying to his voters, hey, look,
you no longer have to worry about driving home from work
after putting a hard day in
and hitting a guy without a job
who's
for some reason decided to shut down the interstate during tonight because he doesn't
have to be at work tomorrow and there's like 30 guys in the interstate shutting it down because
of their beliefs rather than like getting a permit going to the public square during the
daytime when other people would see them and maybe their message gets across i mean you hit
imagine can you imagine a bill like this being passed when the civil rights movement was
happening when they were watching and marching across the selma bridge or when they were um Can you imagine a bill like this being passed when the Civil Rights Movement was happening?
When they were marching across the Selma Bridge?
But they got permits for those marches, didn't they?
Yeah.
Not always.
I don't think they always got permits.
Those were the protesters.
But that doesn't justify putting their life in jeopardy because you're inconvenienced.
Hold on.
It's not putting your life in jeopardy. If I go and stand on a road
at a protest,
on a public road
where I know cars are coming,
that's where cars tend to be,
I'm not putting...
I'm being profoundly irresponsible
and stupid
if I'm foisting the entire onus
of responsibility
onto the people
who are supposed to be on the road,
the drivers.
This is the situation
that we're talking about.
You're in a car and you're pulling up to uh a street you go to make a right turn
and there are fucking a thousand people there do you turn around or do you start honking on
your horn and slowly trying to plow through that crowd you can't you can't turn around you're on
a highway there's people behind you what are you going to do on a highway i mean like that happens it's not as common but it does happen and i'm not a big fan of that but like are
you telling me that the that that it's that it's okay to to drive your car into a crowd of people
no i'm saying i'm saying that what i'm saying is i'm saying that if that happens the person who we
should really start looking at is the person who was in the highway.
We should look at them first, not the driver of the car.
Because the driver of the car was doing what he – let's put it in the water.
Let's say they were protesting in the water and some boats were chopping people up.
We wouldn't be like, hey, they're exercising their rights.
When you're out on the waterways, you'd be looking for protesters out there bobbing up and down because that's where they like to do it.
The thing that I want to keep in mind in this, though, bobbing up and down, because that's where they like to do it. They like to judge on the waterway.
The thing that I want to keep in mind in this, though,
I feel like we need to remember that the driver is a non-participant in this whole thing, right?
It's almost as if we're looking at this and we're like,
well, there's protesters here and there's anti-protesters in their cars.
No, there's protesters here and people who just want dinner you know on the other side and you
it's not like they're out there or make a plane or whatever like yeah i get it but it's that's this
is i mean protest protest i think i don't know about how you guys feel about it i do protest
is something that's sacred that's it's a sacred american pastime it's a really big part of a really big part of why we are the way that
we are and like the rights the rights that we enjoy today are are rights that people bled and
died for before i mean you look at like the kent state massacre you had fucking national guardsmen
shooting protesters peaceful protesters we don't want to go back to that. We don't ever want to go back to that.
Definitely not, but I don't think that this is the step
towards going back to that. I think this is a step
where they realize there's huge
numbers of people blocking public
roadways, and I've watched enough videos online
to know that if you try and inch forward respectfully
to get past these people, they don't move.
They will not move. You're stuck there.
Your entire evening is ruined.
All your plans
anything you had to do a guy in an ambulance behind you anything that's happened it's stuck
because they need to throw a tantrum out there for whatever reason it doesn't matter but you're
not gonna i can't imagine a stupider way to try and get people in the middle to take your side
than to cause gross inconvenience to everyone around you nobody who's on the fence about that
pipeline it's whatever a protest line thinking, you know what?
Actually, they're right.
I'm going to switch.
I'm on these people's side.
They're correct.
The way that they are standing in the middle of the road for hours blocking us, like, it's definitely not good.
Nobody should be able to just run their car into protesters.
But to pretend that there's not some onus or responsibility onto the people clogging a public roadway and treating them as, you know, just, you know, pat on the head children.
They don't know what they're doing. They're just, you know, they don't even realize the danger they're putting themselves in the middle of that road. Like, that's silly. Like,
they know what they're doing and you shouldn't be allowed to protest in the middle of a road.
Like, it's not safe. But that doesn't mean, that doesn't mean, okay, we're talking,
like I said before, an accidental, if you hit someone on accident, obviously that's an accident.
It has to be treated totally differently.
We're talking about people that will – there was a case.
I can't remember what city, but there was a guy who was circling around the block, instigating protesters, drove into the crowd slowly, started honking on his horn.
And then when people got – they didn't start, like, punching him or anything like that, but he ended up plowing into this crowd of people, and two people got seriously fucking hurt.
And that guy went to jail.
The incident that I saw was they were protesting on the side of a highway.
One of the guys finally gets fucking hit, of course.
They drag him to the side.
The car slows down and stops maybe 100 yards away.
They were going 50 because that's the speed limit, they want to check to see if this in poor individual
They just hit in the darkness of the night is hurt so the crowd starts shooting handguns at the car and her you know like
I saw you know well. Yeah, you're gonna find really extreme examples like that. You just named one
Yeah in Hutch's case, I don't think that law helps him.
The guy apparently was circling around looking for trouble.
Not in his case, though, but it raises some pretty morally dubious dilemmas.
I don't know.
Because I could just hit someone and say it was an accident.
Hold on.
What's more common?
I don't know about other people.
I'm somewhat clouded by the fact that there haven't been any protests lately that really caught my fancy.
Right.
You know, like who's protesting now?
The girls with the pussycat hats on or whatever.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Don't love it.
Well, let me.
The Black Lives Matter stuff.
Typically, they're protesting on behalf of someone who really didn't deserve it.
It doesn't deserve your good thoughts and goodwill.
who really didn't deserve it.
It doesn't deserve your good thoughts and goodwill.
If there was a movement that I was on that side of,
I wonder if I'd be more pro-protester.
The protest that happened the day after the inauguration was the biggest protest in our country's history,
and I thought it was a testament to...
I kind of like that one too,
but I hate that it was like Women's March Day or something. You didn't have to was a testament to a decent... I kind of like that one too, but I hate that it was like
Women's March Day or something.
You didn't have to be a woman to go.
You didn't have to be, but that's what it was.
Organize a
men's protest then.
Oh, that would be looked on fondly.
Oh, mine?
We're not allowed to have a men's protest. You know this.
I think it depends.
I think it really depends.
It depends on if we're
identifying as a man or if we have dicks.
That's what it depends on.
If you started a men's protest tomorrow
passionately denouncing circumcision,
I would be right there on the picket lines with you
blocking traffic.
I think it's cleaner, man.
Not blocking traffic, though, because we want people
on our side.
I will block traffic.
See, this is the thing you don't want to block.
See, this is the thing I don't get about the protests.
I will block traffic to protect dicks.
Yeah, but it's not going to protect dicks.
If anything, someone who doesn't give a fuck about circumcision
is going to spitefully be against you
because they're going to be like,
I don't know what these people are talking about,
but I don't want to be on the side of someone
who is engaging in blocking a road.
It just just surprising.
You guys are talking about the harsh reactions,
but there are a lot of people that live in big cities that view protest as something sacred.
And they might feel inconvenienced in the moment,
but you heard stories of planes that had to be diverted from JFK Airport in New York
because of the airport protest, which I actually went to one of.
The one in San Francisco.
But there were people that
were cheering it when they announced
that they had to reroute it because
those people were traveling for...
Because they were upset. Way more people
were upset and not cheering because they're like,
huh, I shouldn't berate this big group of people
because I'm not on their side. I'm just going to quietly
go to my gate and try and get on my plane and not make a big scene.
I thought that what happened in the airports was a really beautiful thing, and I think it affected positive change.
I think it let the administration know that they can't just get away with shit like this.
And what happened was wrong.
We were treating law-abiding residents of this country, green card holders, things like that, treating them like subhuman, treating them like terrorists.
And I think that that's wrong.
It'd just be better if the victims of the protest were the people on the other side of the protest, right?
It seems like the victims of the protest are some poor traveling salesman wishing he was home.
Yeah, because we seem to get caught up and think that there's a huge side over here
and a huge side over here and that's everyone everybody's got a really passionate view on
everything but really most people aren't that into it and so the overwhelming majority i
fucking guarantee you of people who come across those airport protests are just like god damn it
like what is this about i got here early i'm still not going to be able to make my flight like this
is what are they arguing about? It turns
most people off when you inconvenience them.
It's not a good way to... You catch more flies with honey.
This is what
happens when you live in a free
and open society. It wasn't that
long ago when we were ruled by
kings and despots
and rulers who told
you if you fucking do something like that,
they would just kill
you.
So to go from that to a place where we're at now, not just in the United States, but
all over the world, where people have enjoyed these popular revolutions, and you have governments
for the people, by the people, this is a byproduct of that.
It's an inevitability.
When people feel like their rights are being infringed, they will take to the streets.
And I think that that's something that we should celebrate.
When the Tea Partiers were protesting, I never in my mind once thought,
I wish they would fucking just go home.
I didn't agree with what they were saying, but I like living in a country where you can do that.
I have no problem with normal, everyday protests.
I don't like seeing the anarchists out there with masks, though, and I don't like seeing the people who stop the flow of traffic illegally because that's just not the right way to do that.
Like, you're never going to turn the wheels in the direction you want them to go doing it out on a highway.
Because there are people who will use the arguments that the three of us use, the ambulance thing. And maybe
it hasn't specifically happened. Maybe there isn't a poster
child for protesters
shutting down traffic and someone
dying in an ambulance. But it'll happen because they keep
doing it. It'll happen. Eventually a child will
die, a grandmother will die, an organ won't get
to some beloved celebrity. Something
will happen and it'll be the end of that.
You know who protests pretty well?
PETA protests pretty well
right they get girls out there they're naked they're wrapped in cellophane they say imagine
that i'm whatever it's like three people and they get tons of attention right and and you know but
blocking streets ruining airports stuff like that like it's not my cup of tea the occupy wall street
stuff when they were just chanting and stealing
all their fingers or whatever in parks like that got a lot of great attention but it didn't shut
down the city if i recall correctly it made the park really scary occupy got a bad rap in some
ways but in other ways it was sort of it was an accurate bad rap some ways too yeah they weren't
they weren't going after the right people they they were you know they were focused they were
focusing their attentions in the wrong direction
I always felt like and I really felt
for anyone who lived in that city and was like
I don't know it's not my thing but like if I
jogged in that park every morning and suddenly there's
like a couple thousand people in it you know
like shitting in the bushes and now I can't jog in the
park that minor inconvenience would really
ruin my day I think about little stuff
like that when they tell me there's tent cities and lots
of sex and drugs going on in the park now.
Yeah, I do think it's important, though,
that...
It's a good place to go, though, right?
Yeah, right.
I was thinking to myself,
whenever I see public sex,
I kind of like that.
I've seen it a couple times on the beach.
As long as it's not in the middle of the road.
I've seen it on a beach.
I've seen it on a dirt road,
and every time it was like, well, look at that. I do think it's a in the middle of the road. I've seen it on a beach. I've seen it on a dirt road. And every time it was like,
well, look at that.
I do think it's a good thing.
I think it's a really...
Not even good doesn't even do it justice.
I think it's a wonderful thing.
I think all four of us are very lucky to live,
to have been born in a country that allows this sort of thing.
I do think it's something that is...
I think it's so great
that people can go into the streets and uh
let people in power know that they will not be taken advantage of or they will fight them every
step of the way i think that's great man and and like there's so many places around the world where
you wouldn't even think to do that and uh the the inconvenience of being late to a doctor's
appointment or missing dinner or
late to work or whatever that's frustrating i don't think they should be blocking um traffic
i don't think they should be blocking highways but i think that that's relatively a small price
to pay for living in a free and open society um so i'm i do agree with you guys i i think yeah
and i do you too well that's not sounded... I do you too, man.
Gamer than I was going for, but thanks, Hutch.
I do you too.
I think we can all agree on that as well.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's just more...
I think everybody values the right to protest.
I do.
Unless you're an evil despot.
I don't know.
It's a wonderful thing.
I actually got to go, guys.
I got to make some dinner.
Oh.
I enjoyed having you on.
Thank you. Yeah yeah this is a
i never get to talk to people i work by myself i have two cats and a dog and they're my only
company throughout the day most of the time so i never really get to like talk about this stuff so
it's very cathartic for me so thank you guys so much better than the younger version of all of
us to have on and talk to you about this stuff it's always enjoyable and it never gets shitty
no never yeah people people people hit me up in the ads both times when i said i was going on pk It's fun to have on and talk to you about this stuff. It's always enjoyable and it never gets shitty. No, never.
Yeah, people hit me up in the ads both times when I said I was going on PKA recently.
And they were like, oh, man, sparks are going to fly.
I'm like, I don't think so.
No, we might disagree and we might kind of passionately disagree.
I just don't think we're going to start insulting each other.
If I'm being honest, going up to this show, I thought about politic discussion maybe for six seconds.
Other than that, I was like, man, I hope he still
plays Magic. I wonder what kind of decks he's
playing right now. If he's in the Xbox
game, we've got to get him in on it.
Yeah, if you ever want to play Magic on
Xbox with us, jump in. And now's the
time to jump in because we'll just ramrod
Kyle, which is over there.
Hit me up in the
DMs when you guys hop on next and I'll see if I can get it
installed. But yeah, thanks again for the opportunity
to come on, guys. I'm going to take off.
Catch you later. Alright, I'm going to
go and do an ad read, but first, what
set is this card from, Taylor?
I'm having a little bit of trouble reading.
Fire Elemental, and it's red.
Creature Elemental?
There's a star as
the set pack, I guess, but there's also
an emblem there.
Creature elemental?
Does that help you, Taylor? Okay, I mean, it's a fire
elemental. It's a
five mana, five
four creature, but I was
just wondering, because of the white borders
and that white star that I don't think
I've seen before on a set. It's from revised.
Okay. Yes, it's from the revised set. Okay.
Yes, it's from the revised set.
Does it say summon elemental or creature?
Creature elemental.
Creature elemental.
So it's a little newer than that.
Where is... Yeah, just for the audience's sake,
I have four of these.
This is full of cards that I have yet to go through.
Kyle, they can't see you just yet. I'm fixing the
alignment after much left.
Okay, I'll
lift it up again in a second.
It's a lot of goddamn cards.
I'm really
happy with...
I have so many old cards
in here that look like...
Okay, Kyle, I finished. Oh, yeah. I have four many old cards in here that look like... Okay, Kyle, I finished.
Oh, yeah.
I have four of these.
Four of those for 12,000 cards.
Am I right?
Actually, no.
Well, see, I have 6,000 that are mine,
and Kitty has her own...
Or I have 5,000 of mine,
and Kitty has 7,000.
Kitty's came in a deep box,
just put in there, like loose. She got a square
box that was
14 inches by 14 inches.
14 long, 14 wide, and then
8 inches deep.
Just completely
smack full of cards. It weighed
so much. I had a hard time getting
everything in one trip this morning. There were so many
goddamn cards. They were heavy.
And she's been going through them all day.
But I really need to get some binders
or something before I start
going through just thousands and thousands
of cards. Because what do I do
to separate them by color? And then what?
There's a lot more to do
than that. So I need to figure out more about
how to play the game before I really
start. You organize them by color.
Well, of course, that would be my first step, but
then there's a lot more organization
that goes into it, and I may not even
recognize a card that's
key to a resurrection strategy,
for example. I might not recognize,
ooh, I need four of these
if I ever want to make a good this or that
deck, but I won't
know that yet, so I need to learn more about the game.
But I do like the, what I was going to say is I do like the older cards.
Because I feel like their artwork is cooler.
I don't know.
I don't have any of the really old, like, cards.
The thing with Magic, like, if you're, for those of you who haven't played Magic,
if you've only seen, like, Pokemon cards and Yu-Gi-Oh cards or whatever other trading cards.
And this isn't ripping on them they're different styles but if you expect that
to be the level of art you're getting with magic like it's not even close like there's a little
name in the bottom of every magic card of the artist they commissioned to draw or paint or do
whatever that card like it's incredibly detailed so skillfully done like that's half the fun of
these games sometimes it's like making like
a badass deck like a tree men or demon deck and then just like seeing all the cool images and
stuff and even the lands like the common cards the forest little paint yeah it's just super super neat
artwork i don't know i uh but but yeah i like the old artwork it's got more of a matte finish to it
all of them do and and sometimes it looks much more like, I don't know, like watercolors than digital art.
So I'm really digging going through the cards.
And I keep picking cards out that I think look cool or sound cool.
And then I'll like Google them hoping that, oh, this one's worth $3, right?
And like the most expensive card I have is worth like 30 cents so far i think or
something like that that's the disappointing thing like when you're getting into magic i
still remember like opening a pack and being like oh you know whatever the fuck winter's chill like
it's a rare like this is my good one i'll like read it and be like yeah i can make that work
like i can make a whole deck around this this is gonna be this is my champion and then i'll like
look up on a magic forum like how to work around with this card and the comments will be like oh complete waste of time junk rare worthless
five converted mana cost for that kind of benefit what what kind of idiot would run for those and
i'm like yeah exactly what kind of idiot would run for these you know especially not as you tear them
in half crying one of these right even more foolish but glad i didn't get all the foil ones yeah that
post was a joke by the way guys haha you know let me do a uh let me do an ad read here tell
everyone about how many have we done um can you um we have uh two more to go thank you
so we'll wrap up ad reads right here and now we're going to talk a little bit about wink um
here and now. We're going to talk a little bit about Wink. Yeah, I want to make sure I read the right part here. Finding new, excuse me, finding great new wine is tough. That's why we've told
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Yeah, if people don't remember, this is the one, if you don't know much about wine,
they help you pick what you might like.
Hey, do you like your coffee sweet or black?
Do you like mushrooms on your steak?
And they take the things that they learn about you and recommend appropriate wines.
And it was pretty neat because I typically don't like wine.
But on drinking night, I was able to kill a whole bottle and then subsequently return it after the show.
But anyway.
So here's our second and final ad, actually.
Let's see.
Yeah, this is Creature Quest.
ad, actually. Let's see.
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Yeah, go check them out.
I've read that ad three times. I haven't quite
tried this game yet, but like the
more I read this ad, the more I'm like,
do I really need another addiction
in my life right now?
It's a deeper game than I would guess.
You know, like 500 creatures.
Cool.
Check out Creature Quest.
I feel like I have a holdover topic until Taylor gets back.
I went to CVS has a doctor,
and I think it's called the Minute Clinic or something like that.
Have you heard of this? No. I went to it for the first time today. My doctor is almost too successful.
She has a firm. Everybody loves her. We've been taking her to like our kids do her and
she's our family. And now I don't see our doctor. I see like another person in the practice
because I don't want to wait like six weeks
to get scheduled in with my doctor.
And I've been taking too long
to heal from this cold, in my opinion.
Yeah, like two weeks ago, my nose started running
and maybe four or five days in, I started coughing.
And it's like, that's enough, right?
Two weeks of a cold, 10 days of a cough,
like I'm done with this.
So I go to the minute clinic
and try something I've never tried before.
And it wasn't bad.
It was actually like you sign up online
and this is not sponsored by the way.
You set up online and like you sort of get in line.
I go there 15 minutes later.
I'm actually like talking to,
I think she was a registered nurse.
There's different levels of nurses.
I'm not exactly sure think she was a registered nurse. There's different levels of nurses. I'm not exactly sure what, you know, what she was, but, um, uh, and it was pretty neat because it was,
I guess she was there to treat what I wanted to talk about. She, she asked me some history stuff,
surgeries and this and that, but it wasn't like, you know, tell me about your wife and stresses
in your life or whatever. It's like, I'm fucking coughing. Let's focus on this. And that's what she was there for too. And, uh, um,
you know, she's in the end, I was kind of a borderline case for antibiotics. Um, I, I'm not
a doctor, but she was pressing like here and here and here and asking if I had pain. And if I had,
it'd be obviously bacterial and I need antibiotics.
Otherwise, it's viral and they do nothing for me.
This is what I just learned today.
But the other thing is I'm getting tired
by activities that shouldn't get me tired,
like driving Colin to parkour or doing dirty dishes, right?
Because this is not an exhausting activity.
But by the time I finished dirty dishes,
I'm like on the couch like,
fuck, time for a a break you're tuckered
and that would point to something that was like bacterial and uh so she ended up prescribing
me even though i was an edge case like we talked it over and um and then right there at cvs like
you know a few minutes later my prescription's ready and i'm out the door like it i feel like it was an hour and a half and the whole like thing like an hour and a half and i'm leaving
with my prescription which is like i really think it would have been like 60 hours had i you have
your doctor is far too successful uh by my doctor so there are three people at my doctor's office. It's like a family practice.
And there are three doctors. And I always go to the same one. But if I call early, early in the
morning, I can almost always get in in the afternoon. But I can always get in the next day
if I call in the morning. And the pharmacy's two miles away. So it's that every time for me.
That's a shame.
It sounds like you've got a really successful doctor where you're, like, walking into Grey's Anatomy or something.
And they're like, oh, the administrator will be here down in 20 minutes.
You're going to want to talk to him about this.
It's like, really?
I just need some.
If it's bad enough.
Like, we've had times, not the adults, but, like, a kid, I forget Colin or Hope.
It's like they're not feeling well.
We can't get them to drink anything.
They're just sort of spiraling down.
Like they solve it on the spot.
We come in there, they give them some anti-nausea
or whatever in a popsicle
and instantly they're getting hydrated
and things turn around.
If it's, you know, if they're in a real decline,
but me, my sniffles aren't going away
or it's actually a cough.
Yeah, that would probably take a while to see them.
And suddenly, there's this new option.
Like, oh, shit.
Like CVS Minute Clinic, I think it's called.
It's like that when I went to a CVS Minute Clinic when my, like years ago.
No, it was the same thing, but at Walgreens.
Same shit.
Okay, this is all new to me.
It was only because like my ear
was really bad it was when my eardrum burst okay and i like had been ignoring it for so long that
my girlfriend at the time this is years ago in high school how old were you was uh 17 maybe
17 about 18 and i went and i was like i really don't want to go i don't want to go And my mom and her were both like, you got to go. Like your, your ear is disgusting. Like it was
like leaking shit. Like it hurts so bad. Like for days I had been like, if I'd roll over in the
night to like put weight on my left ear, I'd be like, Oh, Oh Jesus. Like that was, that was when
I realized that I don't like painkillers that much. They just make me feel itchy because I was
in so much pain that I was like, mom, please, do you have any like old painkillers or something like this was days before she's like
yeah sure there's some stuff in there and i was like i didn't know how much to take so i'm like
oh two three percocet that's probably about the same as tylenol throw that down then i went
downstairs watched wizard of oz twice didn't remember any of it and just was like god i i
don't feel any pain but i am so itchy like it was not a good trade-off but i hate that i can't
understand i hate to cut you off but i just off, but I hate that. I can't understand.
I hate to cut you off, but I just want to jump in and say like, I don't understand, understand opioid, opioid, uh, drug abuse because every time I've been prescribed one, the itchiness,
or every time I've been like, ah, my back is killing me. Do you have anything I can take?
And someone will give you one or two of something like it's awful. The itching outweighs the pain.
It's, it's, it's, it's so annoying. It's hard to sleep.
And you – like I've literally taken that like – what's that anti – like anti-itch cream.
And I'm like putting it on thick because I've had to take this pill.
I know that – yeah, it does that to quite a few people.
There's a lot of people that don't get itchy from them.
So I'm sure for them they're just good.
But anyway, I went to the clinic thing.
And this is clearly a clinic where like you don't don't show up with, like, my leg.
Ah!
Like, it's just, like, little things.
And so I waited, and like you said, it was so quick because nobody else was going to the doctor at Walgreens.
And so I went in, and it's like, can I see your minute clinic, whatever the fuck?
They're like, yeah, come on back.
Come on back, Taylor.
Let's have a look.
You've been having some ear pain, have you?
I'm like, yeah, it's really, really bad.
She's like, let's take a look here.
And she got her little thing out and wasn't able to fully get it in my ear because it was so bad
but she goes oh oh my yes yes you should have how long has it been like this a week and a half you
should have gone to the doctor a week and a half ago and i was like oh well that's not good what's gonna happen she's like well at this point your eardrum is going to burst it's too late to go in and fix it
in anything but don't worry it's not like a cartoon where you're deaf forever
it just takes a while to heal and I was like what is it gonna like really hurt a
lot or be really terrible or something oh yes and she's like uh really it'll be
a very quick kind of sound.
And then a lot of fluid is going to drain out.
And I was like, oh, Jesus.
And so eventually that happened.
And I just kind of had shit hearing for a month or two until it came back.
Today when I went to the Minute Clinic, she took that ear thing.
And she looks at my ear and she goes oh gross
i kind of knew all along there's nothing wrong with my ears you know what i would have done
if my little joke would be i'd like look in there and I'd be like, Mr. Woodworth,
do you own any pet spiders?
That'd be good.
That'd be good too.
You'd be like, no!
I don't own any goddamn pet spiders. Why do you fucking ask?
Oh, no reason, no reason.
Betsy, would you grab that can of
Raid on your way in?
I was trying to find
a link, because I was going to ask you what
you're talking about getting tuckered as like if you had mono because i've had mono before and it's
the exact same thing where you like do something like carry one bag up the stairs and you don't
feel exhausted like physically and then you'll like put it down and your whole body will like
have like a minor revolt and just act like you just ran a marathon to the point where you're like wheezy being like i'm not tired
i'm not this isn't tiring at all i just i can't keep going like i feel like i haven't slept in
days like was that kind of feeling mononucleosis apparently hey let's get chis checked out mono
i'm sure that's not it but anyway i was at, I was trying to find a medical article about mono,
and I got this
side link thing talking about
a tongue disorder,
and all they did for this
photo is Photoshop a
strawberry into where this tongue
is supposed to be for this tongue disorder.
It's just a strawberry. I thought
it was a really inflamed tongue.
I don't know if they're shopping. That might be a girl
with a strawberry in her mouth.
Yeah.
It looks delicious.
I was like,
oh, look. Because in the thumbnail, I could
see it, but not as well. And I thought,
oh, there's a disease out there that makes it look
like, makes your tongue look like a strawberry.
But no, I'm pretty sure this is
just literally a strawberry. Oh, she has short holy shit it's taking hold it's taking hold the cream
will appear in a day or two if we don't get to this quickly this is the first thing they uh
god punished jobe with oh fruit mouth oh fruit mouth oh while you were gone, I showed Woody what a real robot was.
I don't know if you saw.
A real one?
A robot.
What constitutes a real one?
That's a robot.
Bedroom joys of, oh, okay.
A robot, yeah.
I don't know why I don't check links.
You got to check the link before you click them.
You got to read where you're about to send your computing machine,
because you never know.
I don't like this.
This is just a sliced off piece of asshole in the vagina.
It would be very unsettling to see in real life.
It's the butt.
See, that's different.
They call them pocket pussies.
What a crude term, right?
It's what they used to call like the
uh the what the um what's the big flash flashlight you know they used to have little ones they called
a pocket pussy and i always just imagined some guy like it looked like a vagina with like a box
in the back and some guy like dirty guy putting it on the bed and like getting his vaseline out
and like lubing up his pocket pussy but but this is like a whole woman's prosthetic ass,
like in the perfect position with a butthole and a vagina.
And it vibrates.
It vibrates, you know?
Did you get the juice?
I didn't even look that carefully.
Either hole you want.
They'll even add a third if that's your thing.
It is my thing.
There you go.
Make your own, as they say.
It's the tear them a new one plan. It's $39.99. own, as they say. It's the
tear them a new one plan.
It's $39.99. They don't mind a bit.
But yeah, it vibrates.
The most humiliating thing
of all time, though, right, has to be after
you've finished this. Just imagine being all sweaty.
You just came after fucking
your robot, and you're just like, alright,
time to carry this 30-pound
jiggly robot. Wait robot set the scene take me
there i imagine this guy's just doing it right on the coffee table he's not taking that back
i imagine he like peels it off the glass topping i imagine that it's not just a 30 pound jiggly
thing it's juliet his girlfriend right? And Juliet needs to be cared for after
each session. This is Anna. Yeah, yeah. Give her an accent. I had a funny little pocket pussy story
there. So in college, if you join a fraternity, I didn't, but I had a lot of friends who did,
you have to carry around with you when you're pledging or rushing, basically a little bag
full of all these
like necessities that at any point an active brother can be like hey lighter and one of the
pledges if they don't have a lighter available or if they don't have a condom available they don't
have a cigarette available whatever they'll get in trouble and they'll have to do extra hazing or
whatever and so one of the things that one of my buddies had to do it was two of them actually
because they were both pledging the same fraternity freshman year and they had to have cigarettes condoms a lighter
and they had to have a pocket pussy that could be demanded from them from any active brother
at any time and so there was one sex shop that i knew of in columbia in mizzou and so a ton of
guys had to go there and buy like these and it was was like, you know, bring back a pocket pussy.
And so all of them were going and being like, all right, where's the cheapest one?
Boom.
Got it.
Like grabbing it and bring it back.
And went off without a hitch.
Like this isn't like a one day thing.
You just have to have these things available.
And as a joke, apparently I wasn't there.
This is at the house.
One of my buddies was asked, hey, give me your pocket pussy because they'll just try
and catch you because make him be like oh I don't have
it and they're like oh 50 pushups or whatever
it is and gave it to him
and the guy goes this sucks
you're gonna take this back
tell him it was too big
and you're gonna get me a nicer one
and so this other
guy had to go back to the
store and return it
with his brother there, making
sure he said it, like in the background, like doing some
perusing, and have to say,
this was too big.
I need a smaller, nicer one.
And then he had to pick
one out and give it to that guy.
It was just a funny little humiliation
bonding thing.
How wonderful.
There you go.
It's better than like the 80s
where like getting initiated was like getting paddled a bunch you were the pocket pussy in
the 80s it's like all right bend over it's time going on elephant walks or whatever you got to do
i i talked to um my friend now this is the 90s and you know i was like dude what do they make
you do what do they make you do can't
talk about it eventually because he's my high school friend and we were close he's like all
right well pretty much every sorority makes you fuck and every fraternity makes you jerk off
that's what you do see that's the thing i've heard in the past and i know they don't do that anymore
for the most part because i get in way more trouble. But yeah, there used to be a lot more
crazy stuff, like having to wear
burlap underwear for a week.
Oh no!
Drive you into the middle of a cornfield,
because I'm in Missouri, drive you into the middle of a cornfield
blindfolded in burlap underwear and leave
you there and be like, best of luck getting back!
And then, like, just
stuff like that. Oh, fuck all that.
But that was like... Yeah yeah i'm with kyle
what kind of club do they have like like do we just get to fuck like like like like girls all
day and like like rolling money is that your club no we just we just eat pizza drink beer and sleep
in the smallest bed you've ever seen fuck your club fuck your club fuck your fucking sometimes
fraternities have cooler like houses like you know it's like you can stay in the dorm that every jackass stays in,
or you can be in the party house.
When you go there and there's two people to a room still,
but they're lofts and they're cooler.
I could see the appeal of living at that place.
Suffer through one year and live off campus, right?
If that's what you want.
Me?
I want to live on campus and not be in a frat.
That's my college experience that I would want.
The downside of being in a frat is I feel like it's high school again.
You have this big school where you can be anyone you want,
and then you shrink it to just the frat community.
And now it's he said, she said, and drama and whatever.
You ever see the pornos where it's he said she said and drama and you know whatever you ever see the pornos
where it's like the sorority uh uh where they make the the new sorority girls like eat all
their pussies and stuff oh no no i haven't i'm just trying to know all these amazing stories
my friends uh another good one they had to do is like they they would have nights where they'd all
just have to get shit faced and it'd be like on on a Tuesday and so be like you guys all have class tomorrow morning you're getting hammered right now finish
that drink and so they'd get they got them all hammered all the pledges like early on in the
rush time and apparently they had to do body shots of tequila off of their fellow pledge brothers
which basically means a body shot you know you fill your belly button
with the tequila you put a lime in their mouth and then salt on the nipple area and so then they
gotta lick their nipple area you know take the shot out of their belly button and then and then
take the lime out of their mouth these are all reasons that i'm saying it now that make me happy
i didn't choose this path you know what it's stupid and it's lame and we laugh at it and whatever. But if you did it, I bet you would be bonded with those dudes.
For sure.
Yeah.
Like it's not just some silly thing.
It really does bond you together and that kind of stuff.
And it really depends for fraternities what kind of school you're going to.
Like I only have experience with my friends and fraternities at the one school.
Right, right.
It's a big SEC school.
And so Greek-like life is is gigantic but if you're going to
i don't know boston college you know a lot of those schools like fraternities more of like
and not like i'm this and that it's i'm this and i also do that yeah yeah i would say i would you
remember i talked about not being in a frat and i don't want that because it shrinks the school
etc some schools are like 90 greek and in a like that, not being in the system is kind of excluding you.
It's like the movie The Nerds or whatever.
When I went to school, it was like 20% Greek.
So you just took this great school and shrunk it down to a stupid-ass high school because now you're only hanging out with the other Greek people.
now you're only hanging out with the other greek people and even like on those big campuses like i never it was hard to find someone who was like the stereotypical frat guy of like you know beta house
like just like that like it just i don't know it just doesn't exist in that way there were the only
one person i talked to as a friend is a friend of mine when he was he was a few years younger
and pledging a frat and he was like just about to be initiated and making a big scene about like yeah and i'm learning the secret handshake
and i'm going to be connected with these guys in business for life like with this fraternity thing
like we have so much secret stuff like we can identify people anywhere like but with like a
handshake or something and i'm like that's really neat man but you realize that it's 2012 or whatever
2013 or whatever and i can just find all of your little secret club
handshakes online right he's like no you can't no you can't it's never been leaked you know uh
zeta beta gator house i don't want to say what it actually was has never actually been leaked that
way and so i like out of spite spent like an hour really researching until the next time he came over i was like oh yeah
dude about that uh secret handshake printed it out
oh i thought you're gonna do it i thought you were like let's go let's go
i like kyle's handshake at the end you just like
like oh that wasn't it i was wrong then you were right
yeah and i don't know about what miss wrong then. You were right. Consult the manual.
And I don't know about what Missouri was like when I was in my first school.
There were like two cool frats.
One was Teak and I forget the other.
And then every other frat in sorority or whatever was almost like a ding against you.
Like it's better to be nothing than to be like Alpha Zeta Chi or whatever the fuck it is and i'm like why do people do that like they just they you pledged and paid and did all
that shit to get in a nerd frat like what i found is that because i've had friends in those lesser
fraternity and like it's one of those things where it's not like animal house where one of the frats
is like those guys it's like really you go to that one frat it actually is like animal house where one of the frats is like those guys it's like
really you go to that one frat it actually is like animal house in that way where you go to
the frat that's the quote loser frat and it's not even a thought in their mind what the winner frat
is doing they're just like we're having fun i'm not putting on airs i'm doing what i want to do
and i have friends here like it's just like i don I don't know. I'll say this. Let's rape in the smaller frats too.
This I thought was interesting though.
So there was one of the like,
you know,
smaller frats
that wasn't as popular.
They lost a bunch of guys
to graduation.
So,
and people were wondering on campus,
like what's this frat going to do?
They've got like seven people left,
right?
It's not even a frat anymore.
But somebody was like good at marketing and they, what's it called when you go after people? You rush them even a frat anymore. But somebody was good at marketing.
What's it called when you go
after people? You rush them? Rush. Yeah.
So during Rush,
they outrushed everybody.
They seemed like the coolest frat.
When pledges went to check them out,
there were strippers there
and good strippers
who were doing funky shit.
Oh, I see. Yeah. And all the bathrooms had a stack of porn mags. And I was and like like good strippers who were doing funky and yeah i see yeah yeah and like like all
the bathrooms had like a stack of porn mags and i was like do you put those away like when people
fledged they're like no we put the good ones on top and uh it was just pretty funny because they
had a really successful rush and and they went from seven people to like 25 and and refilled
their frat and then i bet i
don't know any of this i don't even know who's responsible for it but i bet whoever was responsible
for it has a knack for this i bet he's chair i bet he does it well okay i wouldn't know who that is
like i wasn't that close but i bet whoever rushed chaired and was really good at it is growing a
business right now or something like he has a knack for yeah you knew what was up it's such a
sneaky thing too because i once again like going through college we have a lot of friends and fraternities
like i knew a lot of people who were their rush chair and getting their other perspective because
you'd see them around the their like pledges or rushes and they just be like yeah fucking like
connor over there like the man like have another drink dude like and then you get them like alone
and they're gonna be like god, God, I am going to give
these guys hell as soon as they commit to us
because they have been annoying as shit.
Or whatever they say. Because it's their job
of you've got to get X amount of people
to show up. He'll quit.
That guy's going to quit.
I guarantee it.
It's not nearly...
Sorry, go ahead. New topic. This one's worn out.
Okay.
I went to the subreddit because I'm stupid and all the, I, Oh, sorry. Go ahead. Yeah. New topic. This one's worn out. Okay. Um, so I,
I,
I went to the subreddit cause I'm stupid and sometimes I do lots of positive
stuff.
Shout out to you guys who were doing the paramotor,
uh,
uh,
Photoshop stuff.
But,
um,
apparently my favorite Thai restaurant is guilty of,
human trafficking.
Yeah. No, it's not. No, it is not. Ah! Yes.
Wait.
No, it's not.
No, it is not.
It is, dude.
So I read this article.
This woman that I'm showing right here,
I know her.
I don't know her name or anything.
She knows my order without me saying it.
And they're gone.
Curry, fried rice, number they're they're like uh
i guess i was there and there was another regular i didn't recognize her or anything
and she's like ah is i'll make up a name you know louise here and uh and she's like no no
they all new management like well it's so and so here no no everybody has changed i was like that's interesting like a restaurant had a 100 staff turnover and uh and she's explaining that
she has this special deal and they always hook her up with some price and large amount of food
which she didn't need but um uh so yeah what happened was they had this woman paid like $60,000 to come over and work at this restaurant.
And then I guess over some period of time, she was going to own the restaurant, take it over from the regular owners.
And the woman's daughter worked there for free, which is not okay.
And they never got any documentation saying that she could own the restaurant later.
And I want to check to make sure this is true, but I think it said they took her passport.
Oh, that's terrible.
Don't you feel bad for your...
They demanded that they hand over their passports that belonged to her and her daughter.
Yeah, that's slavery.
Yeah, that's real.
It's indentured servitude.
Well, it was like i guess
indentured servitude yeah that'd be the best the definition but but i mean for all intents and
purposes you know especially with that lie there where like every night after a hard day of work
she's like don't worry we're working toward owning all that one day we'll own it all and you know
we're gonna do the next day fire those white people like you know i don't think there are
any white people it's like diet slavery ah okay we're gonna fire kim we're gonna fire kim and then we're gonna
fire kim and then we're gonna fire kim yeah and you better believe kim's got it coming i've been
going to this restaurant for a long time like i first went to it probably 15 years ago i've never
seen a white person work here what do you get i get a red curry uh it comes with the spring roll and if i'm feeling
spendy i get the i don't know what it's called but it's like a coconut chicken soup oh it's very
good i like this the the spicy uh coconut soup i get it thai spicy i like the penang curry uh it's
it's not that spicy but i usually get it thai spicy too so i'm just like crying and sweating
and stuff and i like like the Thai tea.
I don't know if you've ever had one of those,
but it's like half,
half and half and half Thai tea.
And it's really smooth and delicious.
You know,
what's amazing Vietnamese tea.
And it has like these,
it seems like they're blueberry sized.
I don't know what they are,
but like a fruit,
you almost suck up while you drink it.
The straw is big enough to like drink a gumball through.
Like a bubble tea.
Yeah. Oh, maybe you know this. I think bubble tea is what it's called i've seen that place at the mall but i
mean yeah that's definitely it but anyway and so i thought it was interesting i think it's all
sorted out now and there's all new owners i don't know if the new owners and staff are the people
who were like indentured servants and got it sorted out. But I thought it was really interesting.
Someone posted this, and I was like, no way.
That sucks.
Not right here in River City.
And sure enough, it jives with the staff turnover.
This article, I think, is from June.
I need to look more carefully.
Man, that would suck.
Those treatment rights abuses that make it a little saltier.
Right? Like, imagine that.
Being like, having this whole
thing set up where you think you're working towards something
and then finding out you've
been duped and lied to because there's no paperwork.
The dealings weren't legal.
Like, your citizenship may even be
at risk at this point.
In the end, this poor
woman who was indentured,
servitude-itude along with her
daughter probably gets deported probably gets deported and like you know goes back to that
shitty country with even worse off than she was as an indentured servant right in my head the people
that were indentured servitude are the people that have it now the new people because they started
like how does that work though after this article came out like two months later there's new staff like in august or something i imagine they i would
imagine that like it was taken away from like whoever owned it before but you know they're you
know like like you can't just eat what's right is what there's right and wrong and then there's
what's legal and like the ownership of a business doesn't just get transferred to like the person
who was promised it or whatever i would imagine that she was being taken
advantage of and maybe you're looking at a third
party owning it or friends slash
family members of the original people who
were taking advantage of your poor friend.
You might be right. I mean, oral contracts can be
contracts though.
Oh, well, not when you're...
You think?
You think that? I mean, I had business law.
That's what they taught us it's called parole
evidence and it's like spoken but would this be evidence of one like because of the weird nature
of her being a you know coming from overseas and paying the sixty thousand dollars and etc it just
sometimes it seems oral contracts is both sides have to admit that they made it and uh so i don't
know how clever you're not gonna catch them doing that because admitting
that they made this would be admission to a much more serious crime than anyway right you know
unless there's like an email trail that you know started the whole thing before she even came over
like i don't know i'm just making stuff up but no that would make sense they're not communicating
via raven or like snail snail mail or anything.
I would love to see it that this poor person who spent this money and time
and effort and her daughter worked for free
got rewarded with her own restaurant because
you would imagine that that would...
It's what she wants, clearly.
And by the way, the food is just as good as it's
always been.
Hey!
From my perspective, everything's cool. It's always been. Hey. Sorry. Perry's the same. Who cares?
From my perspective, everything's cool.
Honestly, it's just like Chick-fil-A.
I don't mind what they're doing on their own time.
Just keep making the good food.
I'm going to go big on Chick-fil-A.
I think it's overrated.
I think it's just a national chain with decent chicken.
Cookout, though.
Cookout is actually very good.
I have been touting Cookout for a long time. The first time I encountered Cookout, I was like, if there is a restaurant chain to get a franchise in, it's Cookout.
And I'll tell you my evidence around this.
Every time a Cookout gets put somewhere, they have to do something about the traffic situation that is caused.
So Cookout has a huge, huge menu.
It's like three panels.
that is caused. So Cookout has like a huge, huge menu. It's like three panels. You know,
the panels fold out with the menu, dozens of milkshakes and frozen drinks, as well as like barbecue and chicken and hamburgers and hot dogs. It's like a cookout. It's just like that
pretty high quality stuff. They use peanut oil. It's very tasty. But like I said, every time one
is established, they don't take orders like a McDonald's does because that system doesn't hold
up under this amount of volume.
What they do is they put traffic cones in the parking lot and create a new lane of traffic that begins as soon as you turn into the business.
Now you're parked.
Like you turn in, oh, I'm in line immediately.
About five minutes of waiting, a person walks up to your car and says, hey, what do you want?
You tell them.
They give you a menu.
They tell you what. You tell them what they want. They write it down
on a piece of paper and give it to you.
You hold that piece of paper until you get
to a second person. You hand that
piece of paper to that person and
he and only he reads
into the microphone that's sending
the message into the restaurant and then you wait
some more. That's what a brand new
cookout line is like.
That's exactly what Chick-fil-A lines are like.
I've seen that at Chick-fil-A too.
A cookout, I feel like as a potential owner, not that I'm going to do it, but there's no seating in there.
Everything is drive-thru.
I've never seen a cookout where you can eat there.
Oh, that's not right.
Where is this place located?
I've never even heard of it.
Oh, really?
In South Carolina and Georgia, we have seating.
I've seen only like two or three cookouts in my life.
And in each case, it was purely drive-thru.
And I asked my daughter about it.
And that's where I got that information.
She's never seen one either that you can eat at.
So there's one in East Atlanta.
There's one in Anderson, South Carolina.
And there's one, I don't remember the town.
You're talking about indoor seating?
Yes.
Okay.
And then there's one, because I've done it.
Like I've sat in Anderson, South Carolina.
I've went in that one a few times.
But I stopped at one on my way to like Greensboro, North Carolina once.
And I just remembered it looked like a real high school hangout on the inside.
It seemed like there were like so many cars from like 15 to 17-year-olds just everywhere inside.
And the line is just always so crazy.
It's very good food, but I got to say, Chick-fil-A's meat quality, French fry quality, their waitstaff, their beverages.
I don't know if you know about their sauces.
They'll make you like a honey butter sauce for your biscuit.
It's top shelf for me as far as like actual traditional fast food.
You know, things like five guys or another and
you looks good i've cookout is really good closest one to me is 200 miles away i haven't been eating
a cookout because i'm trying to lose weight by the way i'm down four pounds i'm sure a whole
bunch of that self-shaming i'm huge on it uh i know a lot of that is probably just daily
fluctuations and weight you can't lose four pounds of fat in a week, but still better down than up. But if I was eating a cookout, their milkshakes are like insane. There's so many
flavors. They come with a spoon and like no human could drink one with a straw. Like I don't think
the machine could do it. It's pretty much ice cream. Yeah. But you can get like Snickers flavor
or something. It's like 30 or 40 flavors.
Banana cream pie.
There's like 30-something flavors.
It's great.
And it's not that they specialize in milkshakes.
Their burgers are very good.
And their combos are put together in a non-traditional format.
You're probably really accustomed, we all are, to getting a burger, fries, and a soda.
But at Chick-fil-A, you might get two hot dogs a quesadilla and some
jalapeno poppers like it's weird combos like the quesadilla is a side item that just
slides its way into meals you're like really a quesadilla no cookout you're like really a
quesadilla comes with this fish sandwich and okay all right well sure the quesadilla it is all right
like it's it's always too much food it's always really tasty i like cookout but chick-fil-a is better i've only been to cookout twice but um
i feel like it's good it's underrated and uh definitely also i like that it's not national
i like that it's like a southern treasure yeah it sounds better than chick-fil-a but that's just
because it seems like a a different echelon of food when you keep chick-fil-a where it
is which is in the wendy's mcdonald's burger king kind of lineup i think that it it beats those
it's competition so much that it's like it's not even close i don't think anybody in the burger
king marketing room is like how do we catch up to chick-fil-a because the answer would be well
we got to make chicken better and
they're gonna be like fuck now now we're not gonna do that what else can we do can we put
doritos on something that's taco bell we're not allowed no fuck we're gonna be the the frito bun
or whatever the hell they do yeah i like cook out a lot though it's very bad for you can get a big
sack full of food really quickly by ordering extra items.
Yeah, I'm a big fan.
Yeah, I'm not, like, good at ordering.
I went once when I was taking Hope to colleges, like, this summer, and once, like, three weeks ago or something.
It's not easy.
That's one thing that I, like, the only downside, maybe, is it's a little difficult to order.
You want to be like, could you give me a few minutes here?
And you want to take your time, but there's always people behind you. But you really need to
ponder over this
thing. Like, I like chili dogs,
but I can get
three for $2. It's
just a huge menu with so many different cool things.
Is it like having to order at the Soup Nazis place
where you have to know ahead of time?
Where you're like, large lobster bisque?
Well, if you don't want to... There's just such a
line. There's pressure on you to keep things moving along.
You don't want to be that jerk.
Forget about it.
Keep moving.
I haven't been to a soup place like that.
But in Philadelphia, you know the Philadelphia cheesesteaks?
They're famous and stuff.
There's actually two restaurants, Gino's and Pat's Steaks, that sort of represent those.
And I went to Gino's.
I say that's my favorite, but I haven't actually's and Pat's Steaks that sort of represent those. And I went to Gino's. I say
that's my favorite, but I haven't actually been to Pat's. And if you don't order right,
they throw you out of the line. Like I was warned, you know, they're like, look, you have got to have
your order squared away. He's not going to say anything to you, but he'll make eye contact.
And when he does, loud and proud, you say your order. And he's like, do you know what you want?
And I'm like, not exactly. He's like, all right, you want a cheesesteak with onions? Sounds good. All right. That's a cheese wit, no H, a
cheese wit. And I actually wanted provolone and stuff, but I felt like that was somehow incorrect,
even though it's clearly on the menu. So I was just like a cheese wit and a Coke. And he's like,
I passed my test and he gave me my food. But there were other people, you know, they're looking at him.
And if you don't like immediately and properly say your order, it's like, ugh.
You know, like this guy doesn't know how to buy here.
And then he might even tell them to get back in line until they figure out their order.
Well, fuck that guy.
I don't want your cheap steamed beef with cheese whiz on it anyway.
I hear where you're coming from, but the place is so busy.
It's kind of nice that he's doing it.
If you do know what you want, then anyone who doesn't is a dick.
If he were slinging delicious burgers, french fries, anything other than what he is slinging, I would be on board.
But I just really have a low opinion of the sandwich.
Of the real Philly's cheesesteak yeah yeah the cheese whiz immediately says okay this is not a high
quality food like you've immediately stepped into some sort of white trash like quasi food thing
when you put cheese whiz on a sandwich i used to i really don't like those sandwiches at all
like there i've never had like i've had like the ones where it's like oh you know they try and
spice it up by adding real cheese but if you get a real philly cheesesteak you get that the spray
on it that's what actually brings it all together and it's like no it isn't this is horrific this
is awful this is like someone like from the great depression being like oh i wish there was a place
that delivered hard rolls with ketchup on the inside just like mom used to make like no of
course not and it doesn't even compare to like an italian beef sandwich with like the sweet peppers and the
spicy peppers and like the au jus soaking into it like that's a tasty fucking expensive beef
sandwich like if i'm gonna do a beef sandwich it's gonna be an italian beef sandwich with
from like portillo's in chicago it's making my mouth water now i have this like hometown pride
circling around this food that i know in my heart is really
not that good right i'm like not no you're both wrong it's fantastic what could be better than
shitty beef and cheese whiz on a stale roll yeah but that's that's the philly part of the fan
have to like defend the regional food i know exactly what you're saying there's like like nobody who's not from or it's hard to find people who didn't grow
up in st louis who enjoy emos which is a st louis style pizza which is provol cheese on it which is
like cho provolone mixed with cheddar or some some shit and i just really like it because i remember
eating at parties all the time growing up but like when i try to introduce people who from like boston or whatever
the fuck like oh we gotta get some emos they like take one bite and they're like what is what's wrong
with this cheese like is this wrong is this off has this gone bad like this is horrible what does
it taste like is it like a sharp taste like cheddar no no it's it's more mild consistency
it's soft and melty. I really enjoy it.
Of course, you'll get that.
It's funny.
I got the exact same thing.
Because when I ate these cheesesteaks, I used to play in a deck hockey league.
If people don't know what deck hockey is, it's hockey, but you play in sneakers.
But you still have boards and everything.
They also play indoor soccer in maybe the same facility.
Well, deck hockey sounds fun.
Yeah.
And after the games,
which we almost always lost,
we would go and get like cheesesteaks
and stuff with the guys.
And it was just a real neat like guy time
that I enjoyed,
even if the food was...
And you liked it more,
even when you didn't like it
because you're like,
oh, this is like,
this is a Philly thing.
Like it's just something to me.
Right? I totally thing. Yeah, yeah. Right?
I totally understand.
I wish there was a surface that allowed for the speed of sneakers
that you get in basketball, but also the gliding,
or excuse me, the maneuverability of sneakers on a surface like basketball,
but also the gliding speed of hockey.
Is there a way that we could play in sneakers
but on a giant air hockey table
so that you could run,
but if you ever stopped and slid,
you would glide and maybe you could do that?
That seems really difficult.
So do you have to decide
your entire trajectory
where you're like, I'm going to steal the puck from that guy
and you start sliding at him
and then he slides somewhere else
and you're like, oh, there he goes.
I'm still sliding.
I don't know.
We need to construct a giant air hockey surface first.
You know what would make this easier?
It's just use ice and put skates on.
I don't like that idea at all.
Something about people sliding by.
I remember when I was playing hockey a lot,
I think Lemieux made his comeback.
And, you know, if people don't know mario lemieux
considered one of the best players to have ever played right he's in that conversation and um
uh when he came back he was like everyone was just shocked at his patience right he'd hold the puck
defenseman would come flying by like idiots you know he instead of just shooting on net he'd like the
goalie would get like out of position and then he'd shoot into an open net and everyone is like
oh his patience he's so great he's this net so i'm like you know what this weekend i'm gonna play
with more patience right everyone just fucking takes the puck from me like it didn't work at all
it was like i gotta sit here and oh well fuck oh no it didn't work you know next time though next time i got it right here and now you try and come get oh oh
fuck i was like what is this trick what is this trick that didn't even last the whole game i got
stripped like three four times i'm like now do you use a puck or a ball well this would be ice
hockey i was playing so it was but i mean on the deck hockey a ball you'd use uh either a ball or
a roller hockey puck yeah which is just a regular puck with little nodules on it so it slides easier
i should just have ball bearings right yeah yeah a lot like that yeah that's what we played roller
hockey with a ball or puck like taylor describes that's pretty can can you does that can you get
the same speed on that or or does that perform the same what no doesn't slide as well. It's not as heavy as an ice hockey puck.
I think, yeah, I've played roller hockey.
Yeah, there's no way they're nearly as fast as ice hockey shots.
It's just not heavy enough.
I don't know about your roller hockey experience, but I found –
so in ice hockey, if you do a hockey stop, right,
where you go sideways and do whatever,
it's real predictable, the slide that you get. In roller hockey, it's 0 to and do whatever it's real predictable the slide that you
get in roller hockey it's zero to a hundred and it's tricky and and like you gotta lean your
skate over really hard to get it to slide and uh if because if it's vertical at all you just like
high side like on a motorcycle crash and i uh god i i always i and the thing is this, I am actually a curiously good roller skater.
And there were a couple guys in the league that played with roller skates.
They called them quads.
I guess that's cooler.
And dude, they would just, they'd skate backwards.
It was time to go forwards.
They'd get on their tippy toes on the stoppers and then just start running forwards.
And they'd take off so fast. And they skated i was like i should totally be doing that i'm just too self-conscious
to play roller skates in a roller in a roller hockey league and i never did but if i played
with with roller hockey with like roller skates i think i would have been one of the better players
yeah it is infinitely harder to stop in rollerblades than it is on ice
skates and it's something that people don't think as much like if you don't know how to skate either
way you might think like i don't know it's kind of intimidating with the ice and it's so hard and
the blades like do i angle it right like in hockey ice hockey you can just because the ice is not
soft but soft compared to the steel you're wearing on your feet like you don't have to give a little
jump before you stop you can just lean into it and stop really hard and cut.
In roller hockey, the way they teach you to stop,
at least the way I was taught,
is that you almost have to do a little stutter step jump,
get your feet in the air, twist it to that angle,
and then land like that.
And if you stop correctly in roller blades,
it sounds like someone's trying to prevent rear-ending another car.
It's like...
It's so fucking loud and obnoxious. oh my god it is hilarious watching people try and stop on
rollerblades because you don't you fall so fucking hard because those grippy rubber wheels plant you
like you are you know doing the goddamn pole vault and so you just stick there on that sticky rubber and you just full force,
just face plant right into that hard ground.
Like it's,
I could never get,
I played stopping and rollerblades down a hundred percent.
I played in roller hockey leagues and ice hockey leagues at the same time.
Like,
you know,
Tuesday,
Sunday.
Yeah.
Cause what happened in ice,
if your skate is vertical,
do I have this right?
Yeah.
If your skate is vertical,
you tend to like skip across and slide. If you want to cut in ice if your skate is vertical do i have this right yeah if your skate is vertical you tend to like skip across and slide if you want to cut in ice hockey you turn your skate and it'll
it'll cut in roller it's the opposite if your skate is vertical it's like you're like high side
and fall over to get it to slide you really have to turn it like further than you might guess on
its edge and then it'll go and so like yeah every night during warm
ups was really skate focused you know to like get my feet underneath me because it's hard to play
back and forth but uh whatever i don't know i always liked um playing instead of exercising
because like one is games and working out is work and playing games you totally fool yourself into
not even knowing you're exercising.
Like if you just play like two hours of street hockey,
like the thing that will make you want to stop is the fact that like you're so tired.
Like you'll be like, God, I wish I could keep playing.
Like we're doing really well.
And you don't even notice while you're doing it that you're getting that tired.
Like in the same way you would be if you were just like doing reps of something.
Whenever we got done with that, this is certainly not a sport but whenever we got done with uh the go-karts the
other day it was a pretty long race and you'd get done and and i don't know about you i think we
talked about it but like my forearms and my hands were so in so much pain that i i had i was just
like oh i hope this goes away soon hope this goes away soon because you're just squeezing so
hard into those turns and stuff and it's vibrating and fighting back against you and it's just a
15 minute workout like this of just forearms and hands yeah definitely like you you let go of it
at the end and you're like oh my hands haven't moved in 20 minutes like they've been locked
onto this thing and i'm so into the racing racing that when you're about to run into something,
your whole rear-end someone training isn't like,
all right, I'm going to remove my hands so I don't get any injuries,
and then slowly run into them as slow as possible.
No, you're like, ah!
And then you don't realize until afterward that you're like,
oh, I think I shattered my forearm.
Did you have any bruises from the seat belts catching you?
Not visible, but I could feel it for a while right here
on my collarbone where the five-point thing was.
Right above my collarbone, whatever that muscle is above it,
it's got bruises on it.
Yeah, where those should be.
I have some bruises from having a pretty serious collision.
And my back, like my seat being
driven into my back or my back being driven my seat was was bruised up pretty bad but it i enjoyed
it so much that like on my way from the atlanta airport back home i saw like k1 go karts and i
was like oh i wonder if those are as fast as the ones we did in colorado because those things were
fucking fast i really enjoyed that have you ever had enjoyed that. Did you get whiplash from your accident?
I never have
any kind of neck stuff like that.
I really brace myself well.
I'm used to being
in stuff where we're probably
going to get hit or wreck or something.
I'm crash ready.
I'm really crash ready all the time when I'm in those
things. I hit somebody once. I was like
24. I remember this.
I was getting out of work and I was about to go on vacation.
Like I was about to have a week off and go somewhere.
And I'm driving home and I'm in a, not in a hurry.
I'm driving fast because I'm excited.
And as I crest over the hill, there's a stoplight on the other side and everyone's like stopped.
The guy in front of me, Ford Explorer, hit his brakes really hard.
I'm in, like, a Ford Escort or something.
I hit my brakes really hard, but I don't stop as well as he does.
And I slide, and I hit, like, sort of under, but at his bumper.
It's a big enough hit that my airbags go off, and it's totally my fault.
Like, it just was like I was I was driving too
quickly not prepared for the red light and I fucked up I was like 24 and like
my neck hurt for a while I didn't like complain about it I didn't go to the
doctor I was at fault and I didn't want like anyone to know but it was like a
month of like hurting and whiplash
is a real thing I thought it was just
you know something that people
in sitcoms did in court cases or something
but no it'll
one of my friends was in a
sort of a bullshit wreck
in high school where the collision was
not the issue it was the airbag and when the
airbag went off it hit him
normally in a collision it's timed perfectly so you're coming forward and it inflates and it catches you but
because his impact was such horse shit he wasn't back here going forward he was kind of in front
of the airbag and it just fucking hit him and he had the worst burns on his face and his forearms
from it like coming out these like abrasion burns you know
like rug burn my my most one of the thing i fear the most oh i'm glad we like brought up the most
did you see the mat burn uh oh you didn't watch the the event the other night i'm trying to remember
which fighter had this mat burn his entire knee dude really was was exposed like it it may have
been oh shit which fighter was it? I knew the fighter.
I even typed it in. I know the guy's name.
I'm going to look
to see who I was talking about.
It was a white guy, so you could really see it.
I'm going to do a search
to see. Well, he does that.
Yeah, the airbags went
off in my car, and
I had to squish them or something. I couldn't see.
I didn't realize the airbag would take all the room, so you had to like squish them or something I couldn't see I didn't realize
the airbag would take all the room so you had to like get rid of it um it's gunpowder that sets
that stuff off and there was like hot black singed gunpowder out of the air holes because you know
you hit it and air can like go out and uh yeah I I touched it and like I don't say I burnt myself
but I touched it and found I was like oh now I understand how people get burnt and fucked up by these things.
I didn't,
but,
and that was the nineties too.
So maybe airbags have changed,
but,
uh,
they're hot inside.
In my experience,
you figure out the guy's name.
I've never had to deal with one.
Yeah.
They totally,
well,
a lot of times when an airbag goes off,
it's like,
all right,
now the dash is ruined on both sides.
The steering wheel is ruined.
The airbags themselves can be like $1,000 each.
Your window is broken and something else is broken.
Airbags fuck up your car.
And a lot of times they cause a total.
Because back in, I would be driving during the periods where airbags were introduced.
And there were some people that were like,
ah, one fender bender and your car is ruined
because the airbags
do like $4,000 worth of damage
on their own.
Now that seems pretty
awesome compared to dying. I can't find it. God damn it.
It was terrible though. It was terrible.
It was the last event.
I remember... The last event was
two women.
There was lots of fights that night. It was one of the other fights. But only one was the last event like I remembered last event was two women but there was you know there was lots of fights that night it was one of the other fights
oh oh the most I understand
I'm like but only one was the last event
but you mean
I mean the whole thing
but I just remember it was this whole knee exposed
from just you know it's like rug burn but it's
mat burn because that mat is like
sandpaper oh it was so bad.
I just remember thinking, like, that,
I'd rather get punched. I'd rather take a man
punch than a bad mat
burn. I don't want to get knocked unconscious. I don't want to be
concussed, but I'd definitely take,
like, a serious headache for the rest
of your day over that terrible mat
burn. Ah, the worst. That, like,
road rash. You'd take a bad headache over
that? Yeah, man man because it's gonna
heal this is gonna crust over and scab over you get it i don't know about you but i take long hot
showers scabs melt in that you hop out not thinking first thing i do is put like my feet up on a on a
on a little uh uh thing i've got in my bathroom and like towel down my hairy legs i'd scrub that
goddamn scab your showers are so hot your sc are so hot, your scabs are melting?
Sure.
Your scabs don't melt in the shower.
I feel like it's the length.
I mean, I've never...
It's the length.
It's not that.
It's more like, just don't scrub it.
Well, I'm telling you, I'd hit it accidentally drying off.
Like, the scab would no longer work.
Aggressive dryer.
Yeah.
Sometimes my drying off is when I do it.
I'm like, I'm going gonna work some of the edges in
this dry off you know ah it got 10 smaller that was my mission yeah
warning of that um but the rug has road rash all that shit taylor i've been watching this
yes uh oh my god so this guy only got six games for it. Oh, he got six games?
Oh, I've seen this already, yeah.
Yeah, this is bullshit.
Did it cut him?
It almost took his eye out.
So basically Nyquist... Oh, I don't know. I don't know if it cut him
or not.
But Spurgeon played the next game
and then in the end of the gif, you can
see Henrik...
Or not Henrik. Whatever his fucking name is. Yeah, maybe Henrik Zetter then in the end of the gif you can see henrik or not henrik whatever
his fucking name is yeah maybe henrik zetterberg the captain of detroit having to go stand next
to the captain of minnesota and talk to the ref about it and he's making a total like jim halpert
face of like what am i supposed to do here defend that are you shitting me like i don't know but
you can like it's such shit because you can see nyquist turn towards spurgeon and be like i'm gonna i'm gonna blind
you in one eye he turned yeah he looks at his face and then he hits him in the face with the
tip of his stick uh if you look right before he does that uh the guy had um i guess cross-checked
him you know and if people don't know there's a gap in your pads like sort of in the back of
your rib cage that hockey players know about and aim for
we hit him in the fucking kidney right like right about there kidney bottom lower mid back
by the ribs so there's a hip pad that comes now that i see my guess yeah there's a hip pad that
protects you and then there's a chest protector and he clearly cross-checked right in that naked
spot and uh the guy gets up hits him with the tip of his
of his stick and all right so overreacted let me let me give my interpretation of this for
for all the other non-hockey fans it looks like to me that that that a couple of players were
fighting over the puck and this guy comes from behind and deals as much damage as he can legally
to some to an opponent who was illegally who was trying to get the puck,
hits him in the back, lower rib area with his stick.
He's holding the stick with both hands, and he puts the middle of that stick in there.
That would have hurt like a motherfucker.
I almost understand the rage that overcame that guy when he hit the guy in the face with his stick.
But he should know better as a professional athlete who's playing that game that that's a big no-no.
He should have just dropped that stick and fucking hit him in the face with his fist, right?
He should have hit him with a fist.
If he had turned around and tried to start a fight, he might have been able to.
But I think where you're going to go with this, Woody, I bet we're on the same page,
is there are acceptable levels of dirtiness where it's like, that's not legal,
but you're playing fucking ice hockey in the NHL.
It's going to happen.
If they think they can get in on you, and I guarantee that's not the first time that happened fucking ice hockey in the nhl it's gonna happen if they
think they could get in on you and i guarantee that's not the first time that happened that game
that was not the last time that happened 500 other times where you go in and the ref's not
looking 100 you give them a big cross check right in the back it's expected what definitely only
happened to that game was a target what only happened once that game was a targeted attack
with your stick on someone's face like using your stick as a weapon is arguably the biggest faux pas in hockey.
It's suddenly acceptable that everybody has a weapon in their hands.
You've got a lot of dead Canadians laying out there.
Because that's not going to work.
Trump's talking about a border wall in the north.
Oh, and then, of course, Don Cherry.
I think it was Don Cherry.
He's one of the cocky Canada announcers.
Some Canadian guy will comment and correct me,
but he has a huge hate hard-on for Russian players.
Anybody who's not Canadian, he doesn't like it.
He likes good old Ontario boys and that kind of thing.
And his first comment, if I recall, was like,
oh, of course, this is the kind of thing you see from European players.
Not quite as physical, but always down with dirty shit or like not just saying dirty but
like i don't know it's funny watching like the funniness of an old bigot in big quotes
canada where he's like hey we're all enjoying the same game over here but those fucking ruskies over
there and all those fellas and you're not playing it the same way you know we go dirty but we don't
go we don't go too dirty.
They won't fight, but those
who are fucking sticking your face, believe me,
there's the rules
and then there's sort of
almost agreed upon outside the rules
like the first guy did.
And then there's not agreed upon.
There's what's expected
and there's what's not.
Like I said, if he turned around and hit that guy so hard he knocked him unconscious,
we'd all be talking about, ah, you get what you get.
Like, look at this guy.
He was protesting in a highway.
What do you expect?
This is what happens.
Oh, you hit him in the ribs in the back as hard as you could?
That big, large, professional athlete man?
Well, you got knocked the fuck out.
But when you turn around and you, like, that stick could have gashed his face from nostril to like cheekbone.
It easily could have.
It could have taken his eyeball clean out.
It could have witnessed – I feel like he – that's completely uncalled for.
Although, of course – and it really did seem like you're doing something and somebody hits in the back, and he just turned around and didn't swing wildly.
It's not that, so you can't excuse it.
You can't say that – you see that in the movies where a woman's like, get off it, get off it, and the big guy turns around like, ah, and knocks the chick flying, and she hits her head at just the right angle that she dies.
That's not what happened here.
He was like, who hurt me?
You. Ah, take that one to the face
cocksucker like that's totally or that in russian you know that's totally what just happened i think
he's from homestead sweden ah he hit him exactly like he meant to i it to me like it to me sure
did yeah what he did with that stick is exactly what he was intending to do.
Absolutely, yeah.
He may have hoped for more damage in that moment, though.
Because I'm shocked that there wasn't a big nasty gash, like UFC style, but it's laid open.
Like bottom of the nose.
I wonder what the damage is.
I didn't notice.
I didn't think it was there.
I thought it was right here on the cheek.
Almost in the orbital bone, like cheek area.
Do you think that it hurt? And the fact that he did it let's look at jared spurgeon like that doesn't mean anything if you don't know anything about hockey but the guy he hit is not a bruiser or a
brawler he's one of the smallest guys in the nhl he's five nine that's that is not big if you're
a professional hockey player it's shocking nobody comes in and like beats this guy up immediately
right like Why is nobody
sticking up for their 5'9 teammate?
His nose kind of slid
to his cheek. I don't know if he
actually got in a fight later
if they did it to Nyquist.
They didn't kick him out of the game, the guy who did
the spearing, but if they didn't get
in a fight, I wager it's because Minnesota
was winning. I hate that officiating.
That ruins a sport and a game
and my whole respect for it
and makes it all count for naught.
It would be like if you had played
an entire night of Magic and you had a lot
of respect for someone and then you found
out that they were cheating.
You'd be like, ah, well all of that was for nothing?
It didn't even count for anything.
I hate bad officiating.
It really turned
me off that at that last ufc event when i when i felt like they just weren't doing their goddamn
job and he was i didn't talk about it on pkn as much but but he was also stopping um you know
they'll stand you up if you're if you're not working as they call it or effective or actively
doing damage you know and then the same right advance position yeah they tell the guy on the bottom hey you've got to intelligently protect yourself they tell the guy
on the top you've got to be like aggressively working and doing damage to this guy you can't
just put your body weight on him and hug him but they were standing the fighters up constantly like
these are high level jujitsu guys like they're working they got a goal in mind now in the holly
home fight you could say that like that she couldn't grapple
with that girl that girl was too much too much bigger for her to grapple with like she she bad
she was bad in the clinch she didn't get anything done in the clinch and that like i keep saying
that that high crotch thing she she holly would like squat down real low and and like with all
of her might try to like lift around to me and around to me like one foot would come off the
ground this much and then she'd'd sit back down, and then
it would go on for a while. But they
broke up Anderson Silva once, and they broke
up another fight once that was on the ground. I didn't
care for that New York officiating. I guess
maybe it's easy to go after that because they
are brand new to it, but it really does
seem like they're doing stuff that we don't see
normally. And it's
frustrating for someone who's watching
two people fucking fight it out
that that cheap shot really still pisses me off and more than the shot was the reaction that well
the first one it was the one that mattered the most to me the second one it was is the second
one should have been called in the point deducted but not because it was impactful or even quite as
intended it was more at the end of a combo i still think it was intentional i still think she meant to throw those but they look more if you if you saw those uh on their own
you wouldn't be screaming take a point away it's that first one the one that hit her cleanly
staggered her and then dorandamy like sticks her tongue out and goes whoops
like no no you're in a championship fight like there are millions of
us watching you right now we all saw you make that face while you punched the the like crowd favorite
illegally but between the bell like like you of course it's gonna be a shitty day for you to wear
that bell because we're all gonna treat you like a piece of shit who doesn't deserve it because
that's what you are she wants to fight holly again and she wants to avoid cyborg and it's weird because
bisping wants to fight gsp uh for people that don't know gsp was the champion at 170 for a
long time maybe one of the best fighters ever to fight um but at 185 i think he's smaller than
bisping but that would be the the fight um and then there's this guy, Yul Romero, who is an absolute,
I was going to call him a gorilla,
it's somehow racist,
but he's a perfect specimen of a human being,
clearly on steroids.
Or a very weak gorilla, right?
He has the strength of a sickly gorilla.
If you watch this guy,
and he's also like 38 now, I think,
and he looks like he's 21 or something.
Like he's just perfect as a human.
And Bisping would have a tough fight with him.
And he's like, I'll fight the guy weight class down.
That's the money fight.
And I give him a pass for it.
On the other hand, this 145 chick who I don't like wants to fight Holly again and avoid Cyborg.
And it's like, you pussy.
Put it up. know cyborg wants to
wants a piece of your ass you're the champ deal with it i i didn't like the result of the bisping
uh anderson silva fight you know that was enough horse shit on bisping to to be to to like not give
him any uh like like anthology fights or anything like that i thought that was a thing
about that knee that that knee he was unconscious he was laying there unconscious anderson's like
up on the ring on the side of the cage like yeah i won i knocked out michael but he was
unconscious when the bell went off that that's not how like it should be though right so how
does it how does it work?
Let me ask you this.
If you knock the guy unconscious and then the bell rings after that, that doesn't work?
No. I think the doctor can stop it, but basically I think the rule is he needs to answer the next bell.
And he did.
And he won the next round.
It just seemed like Anderson Silva scored a knockout.
Knockouts don't win.
You can get knockouts and still lose, right?
They call it a flash knockout, and they happen all the time.
They knock the guy out.
He's on queer street.
He lays on his back.
And then sometime while the guy's following up, he sort of comes to,
defends himself.
Knockouts don't win fights.
You need a rough stoppage.
Oh, I've seen it like 30 times oh i believe that you have
but but i disagree with you and i'm so i'm telling anyone who might be hearing you right now
that all right folks go watch this shit real quick um there's these two guys fighting and
one of them knocked the other one the fuck out and then some little guy in a suit rang a bell
and because of that he said that the other guy didn't get knocked out that's what it feels like
to me anyway because anderson runs to the and jumps up on the cage, and he's like yeah
I knocked out Michael Bisping, but in his terrible English, and they're running over to him
Please Anderson like literally like this, please Anderson get down the fight has to keep going
They're trying to like say this to him and like broken English and whatever Portuguese this guy knows
He's like please come down you have to continue fighting the British man is recovering
We have to speed this up like he's getting better by every second that we delay this
and and and then he comes back and he fucking loses to bisping and i don't care for bisping
i don't either bisping um is sharp-tongued he uh he says a lot of shit kyle's doing his best big impression he's got
eyes that don't match um and he says a lot of shit that uh that that like would make you hate
anyone else but anyone who's played call of duty knows british people talk great shit like if a
british person would talk shit to me i would just submit you
know like i don't operate on that level they're witty cunts and i just fucking british people
out shit talk me and and bisping is no different you know he just he does his chitter chatter he
says the things that get under your skin and you can either hate him for it or kind of realize what a cheeky cunt he is.
Bisping is an analyst or a commentator who's going to find that out real soon, like as soon as they make him fight the best in his weight class because he is not the best in his weight class.
He is just really good.
He did beat the best in his weight class.
Right?
I'm with you.
I think one time out of 10 he beats luke rockhold
but he knocked him out like the thing is that there's this guy who's a champion of a pretty
prestigious weight class and he just shouldn't be for summer and we can't really we can't like
you can't be like oh well well he shot that guy before the guy could even get in the fight
cheating it's not quite that but it's just like every step of the way you don't like how he gets it done yeah it feels like things are going
can i lay it out a little bit sure yeah so luke rockhold is scheduled to fight uh is it weidman
do you remember he's scheduled to fight somebody and uh that other person pulls out on two weeks
notice they say bisping do you want to fight the champion bisping's on like a movie
set he's keeping in shape but he's literally and he's like yeah i'll do it anybody anywhere give
me a shot at luke rockhold luke rockhold they had fought before luke rockhold knocked him out in the
second round right it's as if they're different levels of fighter and bisping coming up to it
is like hey this is a different fight you know we're starting even again i don't really care
what happened last time so luke Rockhold has a full camp.
He's completely in shape.
He's all ready.
He was preparing to fight for the last couple of months.
Bisping, on the other hand, is like,
yeah, I should be able to make weight on two weeks notice.
Does.
And he knocks out Luke Rockhold in the second, I think.
I'm not positive about that.
But he knocks him out with a left hook.
And so undeniably, he won knocks him out with a left hook and so
Undeniably he won it wasn't a controversial decision. It wasn't cheap. There was nothing against the rules
everyone who knows MMA kind of thinks this Bing would win that fight one time out of ten, but it happened and
Yeah, this Bing didn't even earn a title shot. You know, how did this thing get a title shot? Well, it was in England
So they kind of like him for that and I think it was i'm not positive about that and i was awake and he
and he said yes you know a lot of people you offer him a title shot on two weeks notice and they say
no right oh no nick diaz just turned to fight yeah dana i love that dana calls these like
braggadocious fighters out you know course, every professional fighter wants to...
They're like rappers in a way.
The rapper wants to come out and be a businessman at one time,
but he also wants his constituents,
the people buying his albums, to think,
I'm still a fucking drug dealer.
I do criminal shit.
It was almost like that.
How have I lost my train of thought?
People who turn down fights.
Yeah, so you've got someone like Nick Diaz, whoz who's like of course he's one of these guys the diaz brothers
are he's like anybody anywhere like like bare knuckle brawling as soon as it starts paying well
bear fighting bears with like curved like hand blades that paid a hundred thousand dollars a
night i would be your bear fighter man like but But then, you know, And then they all fight, and he turns him down one after another.
He turned down Lawler,
and he turned down Woodley, I think?
I don't know.
It was 209.
It was this last event.
He was supposed to go in there and fight someone.
That would be Woodley,
and I think he also turned down Lawler.
Oh, I wouldn't want to fight Tyrone Woodley either.
Well, if there was a belt on the line,
it'd be a big money fight,
and he turned it down.
Are you badass or not, Nick Diaz?
Don't be scared, homie.
Woodley's a scary fucking guy.
Conor McGregor can't deal with Tyrone Woodley.
I remember when he was calling him out after the last Nate Diaz.
That's just not going to work.
That's just not going to work.
I got a lot of confidence in Conor, and I really like him.
I don't think he can beat up Tyrone Woodley.
I don't think it'll be even close.
I think there's about 15 extra pounds of muscle on Tyrone Woodley
that says it won't.
I hear you, but there's just not a lot of money to be made
betting against Conor McGregor.
Not so far, not so far.
But, you know, we'll see if this whole Mayweather thing happens.
I'd love to see if it does.
So anyway, Bisping doesn't earn a title shot but takes it because he said yes,
beats the champ.
Now, like, the seventh best fighter in the division is somehow the champ.
All the six guys above him are like, this is so embarrassing.
I can't believe Weidman's the champ and not me.
Give me my shot.
Everybody wants him.
But then he fights Dan Henderson, which is kind of a, you know,
Dan Henderson was not the number one contender by far.
Beats the guy.
Dan Henderson had previously knocked out Bisping.
He's what fucked his eye up, I think.
But, you know, gets his defense.
It's cool.
Now it looks like he might get another easier than number one
contender fight.
If he fights GSP from a weight class below
and doesn't have to fight
Yoel Romero, who's a killer,
then that's really interesting.
If I were a champ,
I would be doing my best
to not fight the number two, right?
Or the number one contender, I guess you would say.
I don't want to fight the Khabibs
of the world, Khabibs of the world. I don't
want the Tyrone.
I don't want someone like Woodley, a killer.
I want to fight the number six
or seven guy, or maybe like
what he's suggesting, like, oh,
we could make a lot of money
Bisping versus GSP.
All those old fans who haven't
maybe bought a pay-per-view in 10 or 12 years, they're gonna buy a GSP, all those old fans who haven't maybe bought a paper, pay-per-view and,
and,
and,
you know,
10 or 12 years,
they're going to buy a GSP fight.
Ah,
this will be great.
And he's got a good point.
It will be great.
It will make a lot of money.
You bring a good point.
And especially with the GSP thing,
I think you take that fight.
But if you're a champ who wants,
if you're a fighter who wants the toughest fighter available all the time,
that's why McGregor's the man.
McGregor's the man for two reasons.
One, he speaks pretty well.
Two, he's like anybody, fucking anybody.
Like, you know, on his run up, the 145,
he'd just give me the toughest guy who doesn't have a fight booked.
Every time he fights, Chad Mendes comes along, right,
because Aldo pulled out.
He doesn't say, no, no, no, I don't want to risk my title shot.
And he's an American wrestler who was supposed to be like the antidote for Conor's poison.
And no, he takes on an American wrestler, knocks him out, takes on Aldo, knocks him out.
Then who does he want next?
RDA.
RDA pulls out.
He gets Diaz.
Diaz doesn't want to fight at 155.
So McGregor says, fuck it, I'll'll fight him at 170 I don't give a fuck we'll fight him at any weight they fight at 170 he loses so what does
he want again the thing that he just lost right that he wants Nick Diaz at 170 pounds wins that
who's he take on next the champion at 145 Conor McGgregor would say yes to woodley like conor mcgregor it like
dude he says yes he'll say yes to mayweather in boxing rules that that's why he's awesome
that's why people don't like woodley woodley is always looking for some easier fight
yeah that's that's the kind of champion i would be too because you want to you want to wear that
crown as long as you can and get those endorsement deals and make some money.
It's a mix because you can either be a stupid champion for a long time who dodges fights, or you could be Conor McGregor,
who everyone just adores because they say, yes, Chuck Liddell was another guy.
Chuck Liddell has what, like two or three defenses?
I'm probably low on that.
But people still remember him as you know the ice man
he was the champ why dude he took the hardest fight he could find all the way on his run up
to the title and while he had the title he didn't dodge randy couture tito ortiz like he went after
these guys yeah you don't want to be seen as like dodging fights shitty fights but but but if you
can do something that's in the middle like picking a marquee name to go after or a freak fight, you know, like a weird kind of like.
I mean, I feel like Conor's doing that a little bit with this whole Mayweather thing.
I feel like he should be in there getting ready for whoever's about to win between Habib and Ferguson.
Ferguson, who's a real killer himself.
You know, that should be his focus, like a laser beam.
But it's certainly not.
It's making $100 million in one night.
That's his focus right now.
And hey, maybe I'm an idiot.
Because one of us is about to make $100 million,
and it's probably Conor McGregor.
Yeah.
I find him fascinating, man.
Interesting. I think we're going to see him lose, and we're going to see it soon enough.
I don't think he can beat Mayweather, and I think when he comes back, Habib is going to beat him.
And I don't know who he fights after that, but they probably find someone that will be an easy one.
And I don't see his career going higher than it is right now.
I think he's peaked. I think he's peaked, and now we're going to see either a plateau or a slow decline or it may be some some some bumps and waves
where like he loses one wins two loses one i just don't see him coming he's not gonna beat mayweather
uh and when he comes back he's not gonna beat habib so i think you might be right but um he's
29 so he shouldn't peak for another two, two and a half years,
something like that.
I don't mean his body.
I mean his star.
I think, I think that things are changing.
Right.
So the problem is, is he going to go Rocky four on this Rocky five,
where he just buys robots and, you know,
does rich people stuff and stops caring about fights.
It's hard to get up and run when you're sleeping in silk sheets, right?
So that's, I think, happening to him.
But the thing is, he's Conor McGregor, and he does shit you don't expect.
I thought he was going to lose to Alvarez.
I thought he was going to lose to somebody else, too.
I thought Cole Miller might have beat him.
Did I say Mendes?
I don't know.
But Conor wins.
Here's what I hope happens. Here's what I hope happens.
Here's what I hope happens.
Hope he goes in with Mayweather, right?
He's not taking a ton of damage, but he's losing, you know,
because Mayweather's so defensive and he just makes people look bad.
And then he starts cheating, you know?
A good old kick to the thigh.
Roundhouse spinning shit.
If Mayweather got kicked in the fucking thigh,
he would react in a way we've never seen a fighter.
Because fighters just fucking, that didn't hurt.
And sometimes a fighter will then immediately plant that leg that just got hit.
And, like, move to, like, show, like, not only does it not hurt.
I think you loosened it up a bit.
Thanks a lot.
Like, but Mayweather would be like, oh, oh, oh.
He'd be, like, calling, like, get my doctor over here.
My doctor, Steven, Steven, come here, look.
Like he would react.
Most people think Conor McGregor will lose a boxing match to Mayweather,
and that's fair.
But nobody thinks Mayweather could beat up McGregor.
Like take away the rules, put him in an alley,
allow eye gouges, I don't give a fuck.
Mayweather gets crushed.
First of all, McGregor's bigger.
He's a good bit bigger than Mayweather.
McGregor is bigger than Mayweather.
I hope I said it right.
But you just make it a fight where you can take a guy down,
where you can kick, where you can do fight shit.
Conor McGregor just, it's his easiest
fight in his whole career. He has the superior combatant
in all ways. Yeah.
He'll have never had an easier fight
career long than he would against Eddie Weather.
And it's because of that
that I think that even if Conor loses
that won't diminish his star in any way.
It would be like if he went out and lost at
softball or baseball. It's not,
it's almost comparable, almost. at softball or baseball it's it's it's not it's it's almost comparable almost you know because because it's it's it's a fighting sport but it's certainly
not what connor does is a fighting sport is is virtually just combat because there are so many
examples would be what if connor went out and lost a brazilian jiu-jitsu tournament
would that i wouldn't ruin his start to me it was brazilian jiu-jitsu like i get that they're both kind of fighting it depends who he loses to if he loses to like the the champion from ohio
state then you're like oh god damn he can't even beat that collegiate guy who's you know that's a
shame but if he goes up against like we always see there's there's one guy i can't think of his name
but they uh joe rogan's always like this guy is a world champion jiu-jitsu master like he makes black belts tap he makes
black belts look like fools he does things that people other people don't do he's been doing you
know if that guy beats you in jitsu you're like oh well what did you expect i'm i'm conor mcgregor
i'm the two belt champ not the jiu-jitsu champ if you want me to be start start making it pay more
i know like i've entered one brazilian jiu-Jitsu competition and I entered in two events for the same day.
I got a gold and a bronze.
And the one guy that beat me was an Ohio State wrestler.
It's like, oh, got to bring that shit up.
Thanks, Kyle.
You can't even beat this Ohio State.
I want a punk.
Punk.
But I'm just saying, you know, it looks bad if you're Conor McGregor.
Just in the same way.
He cheated, by the way.
I want to put this out there.
Checked your oil, didn't you?
No.
He didn't mind.
My neck was already sore.
Because people would do neck cranks, but I was like, this is just a pain move.
Fuck it.
I'll wait it out and then continue on.
And I would get injured too much.
I'd probably be smarter today. So I went in there with this neck injury and the fucker just like,
he neck cranked me all match long and like,
he didn't do much.
He couldn't advance position or anything.
He just sort of held me down in this neck crank.
And I think healthy me would have been able to like resist more,
but wounded neck.
Me was like,
are you seeing this shit?
Like you can't do this.
And the ref never
called it and he just let it sort of continue all match long and i lost on points yeah well
that's a shame but yeah if you're conor mcgregor and you lose the guy from ohio state it he's
supposed to win yes he's supposed to win i think i think he is um but but but i don't know combat
sports are great i love that you get a winner and a loser. That's why I was so upset after the Holly Holm fight. It's like, hey, I don't get what I came here for. Because while I think that Duran to me tonight was the better fighter, I don't think she deserves the win.
them walk away with the belt and the money and the endorsements and leaving our kind hero over here beaten and bloody and crying.
It just feels wrong.
It didn't feel like we got the correct resolution at the end of that fight.
Not correct as far as right and wrong.
It just feels like the judges did the wrong thing.
I wanted another round or something.
I don't know what I wanted.
I wanted them to do it all over again.
So I'm glad there's going to be a rematch of that. I certainly hope
there is. And I hope Holly wins the next time.
I like the way you said there's a winner and a loser.
Because I know Joe,
I feel like I have
more in touch with behind the scenes
than I otherwise would be.
And a
guy loses and the camera points at
the winner. That guy might still be on
the ground not moving or something.
He could be knocked out.
He could be on a stool having a difficult time staying on that stool.
He's so, you know, suffering.
But the camera doesn't show that.
And now I am always looking at the loser.
I'm always very interested in, like, the damage done and the life and the career of both guys.
And it's such a win-lose business.
The loser.
Did you see when Conor McGregor was doing his live stream event?
No, it was a different thing.
He was being interviewed, and they showed tape of him knocking some guy out.
I remember maybe it was Chad Mendez or whoever that was that was the good
wrestler that he took out.
And we felt like the guy didn't put his game plan into effect or whatever.
And he's watching the guy, like, knocked out on the ground.
They're playing that part, and he's like,
I don't like to look at this stuff.
Was it Eddie Alvarez?
May have been, but he was looking at his opponent.
He's watching video of him knocking out another guy.
He's like, I don't like to look at these things.
He's like, we're all professionals, and we come here to fight, and we promote a fight, but I don't really like this. I don't like to look at these things. We're all professionals and we come here to fight and we promote a fight,
but I don't like this.
I don't like this because it's showing his opponent beaten and bloody
and hurt emotionally and physically.
And it was nice to kind of see that from him.
Interesting.
So coming up is Khabib versus Ferguson.
And Khabib said he was going to break his arm.
And Ferguson is like like break my arm
like i've got a little kid that i hold with that arm we just had a baby and i was like you're not
supposed to be scared of that you're supposed to be like oh bring it i got more arms you know like
like you're supposed to i think he did a new arm and punch it with that. But it was like, you know, don't break my arm. Like, that's just not nice, you know?
And then, you know, like, I don't know.
He's like, it wasn't nice when Soviets bombed my country in the 80s.
We do not care.
I lose little brother.
That's his kind of lifestyle.
Fucking Dagestan over there.
I'm telling you, Khabib is i i coco diaz kept saying kabib and
it's gotten into my head and i'm saying it now you're saying it but you don't pronounce the k
habib is a is just he seems like a spartan warrior from the outside looking in that at least that's
his hype tape right that's that's what we're led to believe from this 20 victory and 20 is it 20
and 0 or 23 and 0 it's one of the others like this crazy undefeated
like russian from dagestan who trains at altitude and under military uh conditions with a father
who's a champion in three martial arts like sambo and jits and uh another thing and you know he's
he's just a killer who who's like so motivated and you look at that michael johnson fight i
think it was where he's he's punishing a guy who who is a is a contender a great fighter and he's just he's telling him
he's telling the fighter he's beating up he's like you gotta quit you gotta quit you know i
deserve this title shot you know what you quit and michael johnson gets out this little bullshit
like slap and he's like oh you should all right then i see how it is he's just like forearm forearm
forearm and it's just like that's the guy who's kind of coming for conor mcgregor the guy who
while he's beating up a world champion level contender he's looking at the boss of the ufc
going give me conor give me fucking conor and he's like you finished that guy first he's like oh i am
when i'm done playing with him like that huge build up very interesting um ferguson might
be like ferguson's a bad mother is a bad mother it's great all these wins but not many of them
are over people i know exactly that's why i say the hype machine of habib because because he could
be a like a you know he could have this tasty shell on the outside, but we don't know that Habib's had 85 concussions
since he was 13 because of his father's regimen.
And now if he gets tapped by that left of Conor
or Ferguson's hook, he's going to go to sleep like that.
We don't know.
We haven't seen him take a championship-level blow
to the fucking head.
We haven't seen if he can duck a kick.
We just don't know.
We haven't seen him against the best of the best,
but we will.
And I'm afraid for Conor because I think he is good i hope we will i hope we will because i watched him wrestle that bear and i and i and i and i pretended like that wasn't
just like horse shit for the camera like i was like he just found that bear that day too
he's just playing with the little one he killed the mama i always say this but you know when the
patriots played the falcons you knew you'd get that game right even if tom brady got hurt they'd
still play uh with yeah habib versus ferguson i hope it happens i think it's gonna happen they
so they both seem like the type who are like both of them are thinking in there i think both of them
want connor no one more than habib i don't think but but but i i think they're gonna fight even with
some nagging injury or something they'll have to get hurt hurt habib's missed a lot of fights
you know that guy yeah glass okay all right well i hope it happens as well uh i'm looking forward
to it a lot it's probably the biggest one on my radar right now, I guess. Of course, Cyborg do...
You know, they should...
Woodley Wonderboy is a neat one.
Yeah, that is a one. I think Wonderboy
will win that, and I can't wait.
Woodley...
I think Wonderboy will win that, and I can't
wait. That'll be a good fight. That's a close one.
I don't know. I don't like Cyborg at all.
Like, man, she's hard to look at, and I
know that it's the first instinct of an MMA fan,
this scenario, it seems, to be like,
ah, Cyborg will redeem us.
She will make this right.
She will settle the black and white in the world.
She'll make it all correct again.
But will she?
I think you're just seeing one villain riding in
and taking the mantle from another villain, if you will.
And meanwhile, Holly is still over there, you know, 3-0-3.
So I think what you really want, if you think about it hard,
is for Holly to come back better than she was before,
this time with some better clinch games, some better grappling work,
and hopefully better takedowns,
because she seemed to have nothing but that high crotch.
There was never a double leg attempt.
There was,
there wasn't,
I,
there weren't attempts to,
I would have liked to have seen her combined like some high kicks within some
takedown attempts,
like,
like,
like,
like to sort of mix it up so that she could get something going because her
kickboxing versus Durand,
he's Muay Thai.
It seemed like,
or it was Muay Thai,
right?
That she's a champion of.
I think so.
I think maybe I said Taekwondo at one point, but like, it was Muay Thai, right, that she's a champion of? I think so. I think maybe I said Taekwondo
at one point, but I think it was Muay Thai.
I think that the Muay Thai's,
her Muay Thai was better than
her kickboxing.
It just seemed that way.
That question mark kick was sick
though. I love that.
I love that. That would have been such a great
highlight, real moment. They'd have put that
clip right in there with the one of her KOing Ronda,
and it would have been beautiful.
It's a damn shame she didn't win that fight.
I think what you want is for Holly to somehow win
and then Cyborg to test positive again,
and now we've got what we want.
That's exactly what I want,
because I don't think Cyborg should be allowed to fight other women.
I think Holly probably cheats, too. When you say other women, are you implying cyborgs a girl?
Yeah, well, I think that there are
certain tests that a doctor would be like, oh, this isn't a man?
But she was born a woman. She's got the genetics
of a woman regardless of her hormone levels.
I think that Holly probably has done a bit of doping herself,
but she hasn't done so much that she has turned into a superhuman
or anything like Cyborg has.
Women deadlifting 300 pounds is so fucking unnatural,
and you have to be insane to think anything different.
That is crazy unnatural for a woman to be deadlifting 300 pounds.
That's outrageous.
Especially not a woman shaped like that.
It's usually this big hoss of a woman who does that.
The whole world wants her to make 135, and she's still packing on more muscle.
It's like, what are you doing?
She's like, I'm going to be the first lightweight women's champion.
That's what's coming.
She needs to be fighting at 155.
She really does.
She really does.
There's no one else to fight.
Because 145 is what she was fighting in Pride, right?
And that was a real serious cut for her.
Invicta, is that what it was?
Okay.
I watched a few of those fights because with the UFC fight pass thing,
you got all those fights.
It's really cool to go back and see what you know, see, see what's going on.
But I got no love for cyborg.
I don't want to see her win anything.
I'd be fine if she was out of the sport.
She's just,
she's,
she's on the same level as a Brock Lesnar.
She is the female Brock Lesnar.
Yeah.
Yeah,
that's true.
And yeah,
the thing is,
I feel like there are males who can fight Brock Lesnar.
I just don't see a woman in the world who can fight Cyborg.
Like she's cheated too much.
It's too far.
That's true.
She has the – yeah, that's absolutely true.
Shane Carwin, who's also big on vitamins, was Brock Lesnar's size.
big on vitamins you know is uh it was was brock lesnar's size uh ovary also huge on vitamins i guess uh it beat brock lesnar um was mark hunt whenever i see mark hunt roll out i'm like
is that the hot dog man did the hot dog man stumble on into the octagon and oh oh oh the
hot dog man has hit him hard oh Oh, the hot dog man hits hard.
That's every time I watch a Mark Hunt fight.
I want to say Kane beat Lesnar, but Hunt lost to Lesnar at UFC 200, I think.
Mark Hunt just has this physique that's not that of a – but he hits so goddamn hard.
Another guy you like, Roy Nelson.
Same thing.
Well, Roy Nelson's got like a big belly.
And when he wins, he gets up on like the uh the ring
of the edge of the octagon like sits on it and he rubs that belly like a mortal kombat character
like you'd win in mortal kombat and that one guy like does some like drunken kung fu and then tips
up his big like um um um like gourd of liquor or whatever like that's roy nelson honda in street
fighter are we yeah i am yeah yeah he gets up up there and he's rubbing that big Buddha belly,
rubbing it for luck.
It's just silly.
He's too overweight.
But Mark Hunt, he comes in kind of looking like dog shit himself,
but he's on a higher level than, or at least he was,
or kind of still is, I guess, maybe, than big country.
I wonder how his lawsuit's going.
He sued the UFC.
than a big country.
I wonder how his lawsuit's going.
He sued the UFC.
Mark Hunt had a string of guys who were positive for steroids.
And he's not using any.
Yes, it would seem that way.
And now he's suing the UFC
for, according to him,
knowingly put him in there against cheaters.
I hope he wins.
It would set a wonderful precedent.
That should be the precedent. It should be like if this organization knowingly pits one human being
against another in a combat sport well when one of them clearly is is doing illegal substances
and that are giving him not only an illegal advantage and an unfair advantage but the
potential to create bodily harm to this other guy then then they should be liable
for it for that and they should pay through the through the teeth i don't like that they did that
to him and to a lot of other people and it's even to jones to john jones fold it's twofold if they
make someone fight cyborg it's it's just as bad you shouldn't regardless of what a fighter says
because what they're supposed to say is i'll fight anybody they're it's their it's their job to say
that it's the it's the it's the responsibility of the ufc not to put someone in there with someone
who is fucking superhuman like cyborg is it she's not like the rest of us she has done huge amounts
of chemical alteration to her physique and anatomy and she's not like us anymore she and it's not
like you could just take the drugs away from her 100% and put her on
beans and beef
and do the same to Holly Holm and put
them out in the desert. No, because
Cyborg can't survive anymore as a
regular human being without drug therapy
to make up for what she's done to herself because
of the chemical alteration. This is some
sci-fi shit. This is what Bane's
problem was in Batman.
He'd been pumping that shit
into his fucking jugular
for so long that he just had a
constant supply of it. That's what
Cyborg is. You take her fucking, you pull the
hose out, wait six weeks, and
then let's fight.
I don't like Cyborg. She's a cheater.
I don't like Brock Lesnar.
He's a cheater that probably
brain damaged Mark Hunt. I don't like that stuff. I don't like Brock Lesnar. He's a cheater that probably brain damaged Mark Hunt.
I don't like that stuff.
I don't like the cheating at all.
Did you go to detect on Mark Hunt?
The guide is not on fucking.
Those things cut you.
I know you know it.
But, you know, they really lower your fat content.
It's hard to be a chubby bastard while also being a professional fighter and being on steroids.
You've got to pick one or the other.
Like you just can't have a Mark Hunt physique while being on not steroids,
not testosterone.
Mark Hunt is Samoan, I think.
He is.
He's got a genetic predilection to being a little chunky, I think.
But tell that to The Rock.
Good point.
Well, The Rock is on plenty of pads.
He's also on the vitamins.
Also on the vitamins.
That's a good point. You've seen Channing Tatum lately? No. Oh, God. on plenty of pants. He's also on the vitamins.
You've seen Channing Tatum lately? No.
Oh, God.
Oh, wait. Is Channing the one who's in the new
Baywatch with The Rock? Who's the guy that's in there with him?
It's the other
pretty boy, muscle man.
What's his name? Channing Tatum
fits this.
I know he does, but it's the new Baywatch
guy.
Rogan was discussing whether he was on
Baywatch. Is it Channing?
No.
I know Alexandria
Daddario was in there, who has got to be
my favorite
watch it for the plot moment
of this decade.
Just getting super naked in that show.
What show are you talking about?
True Detective Season 1
Alexandra Daddario
is the huge boob
woman who gets naked.
Oh my god.
You already pulled that from a file.
Oh yeah that one.
You know what?
Zac Efron. One of my God. You already pulled that from a file? Oh, yeah, that one. You know what? Zac Efron.
You've got...
One of his favorites.
Exactly.
I was trying to put it right.
You've got the book on the top of the shelf,
and you've got the folder on the desk.
That's folder on the desk.
Yep, the book doesn't get touched much.
Yeah, yeah.
There's too much good stuff in that folder.
Long-term memory.
The hot files are right here.
Man, I'm a huge fan of Alexandria Daddario.
She's borderline perfection.
Just very, very beautiful, beautiful woman.
But yeah, here's Zac Efron for Baywatch.
I think he's been hanging out with The Rock and The Rock's doctor.
Dude, this guy is insanely fit.
He's always been insanely fit. he has that's why that's
what joe rogan said when they asked if he was on steroids joe's like i don't know he's always been
in great shape if he did x y and z he could do this without steroids sure i i just have to i
don't know he's like an action why would he the answer. Why would he do this without help when The Rock is clearly doing crazy things with help?
There's nothing to be ashamed of if he used some drugs to achieve this because it's not like he shot up and then became this.
He shot up and then worked out every single day for five to seven hours a day for years.
That's what he did.
Right.
If people don't know, and I'm not an expert expert, but what the drugs allow you to do is recover.
They make working out fun because you could just blitz your body, get a great feeling of satisfaction, and then blitz it again tomorrow.
And you're maximizing potential.
It's the recovery.
It's that maybe each rep gives you a little – you get a little more out of each rep.
But then that's just the testosterone stuff that has to do with, well, lots of stuff but but you know the building of muscle and the forming of muscle proteins and
stuff but then there's hgh and all the blood doping stuff there's so much you can do to make
your body just work better he's got to be honest and he's certainly got a dietician and and personal
trainers like that's incredible though he's achieved an action figure level of physical perfection. Yeah, yeah.
It's ridiculous.
Ridiculous.
He's going to make a folder of him now.
How did he get in here?
What the hell happened?
Yeah, no.
I can hardly think of many people as fitness.
He's not as big, but the dude from Buffy the Vampire Slayer,
the brother.
He's a...
He's blonde.
Oh, that guy.
You mean the vampire?
The vampire from Buffy?
The blonde spike.
Wait, did I say Buffy?
You said Buffy.
I made a mistake.
I'm going for...
What's the one with Snoozy or something?
True Blood. True Blood. Snooki. Right. So I'm going for... What's the one with Snoozy or something? True Blood.
True Blood.
Snooki.
Right.
So I'm Snooki's brother.
Snooki's brother.
What's his name?
Snooki.
Snooki.
What's the brother's name?
Oh, her brother, Jason.
Jason Stackhouse.
Yes.
Jason Stackhouse is...
I don't know why we're talking about hot guys, but here we are.
stackhouse is uh i don't know why we're talking about hot guys but here we are um that guy is in my mind like i don't know if he quite keeps up with um uh zach efron well lc'd from the show the
guy who transformed into a werewolf who was dating sookie for a while he had a lot he really he could
really pack on the mass he seemed to have all of the very low fat content,
but also much bigger and bulkier
and a larger frame than a Jason Stackhouse.
What impressed me about Jason Stackhouse
is this show had like an eight year run.
Yeah.
And he was like this for all eight years.
The whole eight years.
Yeah.
And his character was like that.
His character was vain, always working out.
So they like worked it in.
Like he's always cranking out pushups.
Like if you watch Psych, the main character in Psych,
I don't recall his name,
clearly gets chubby over the course of that show.
You know, six years later,
it looks like he entered his 30s and likes food.
And I feel like that happens to a lot of actors.
The thing goes on and it's like,
wow, I almost forgot how hot Monica was
when the show started.
Val Kilmer.
Poor Val Kilmer.
Oh, poor Val Kilmer.
Come on, Val.
You need the FPS boot camp.
That's what you need, Val.
You got to get back in that Batman suit.
They should send the Batman suit to his house
and let's put it up as a constant reminder of where he should be how big is he now is he that big last time i saw him he
looked like two 245 250 like like he he's a taller guy i think and he looked big and chubby he's
but he used to be he got big big at one point he's i'm talking about that i'm talking about
that image where he's like like smiling like a goober at the camera.
But what else do you do, right?
Like he's trying to do the best he can.
I don't know.
Poor Val.
That's all I'm saying.
Looking up Val Kilmer.
Val Kilmer fat is what you want to look up.
Poor Val.
Val Kilmer.
See, in 2010
he was really big.
Yeah. Oh man, his face
is so wide. How did he get so
wide? Oh, he's so...
Oh, poor guy.
But he's...
Look at the
definition in his face when you go back to that
Top Gun mode. He looked like Steven
Seagal. He looks like Steven Seagal now. Fat Steven Seagal. Not now. That's 2017 here. Oh, is he trimmed down?
Let's see what you got. I'm sorry. I meant to say it's 2010. So here's 2014, four years later. Half
the man he used to be. You have to scroll down and look at his like window reflection stuff. Like
that's, it's, it's not where you want to be as a movie star, but it's, you know, dramatically better.
Oh, that's perfect.
Yeah, he's good.
He can act now.
Okay, yeah.
We put a little CGI on him.
He needs to work out a little.
You know, that's not Batman physique, but it's not Fat Man physique either.
Oh!
Roll that one out.
All right, let me do my post roll.
You want to wrap?
I want to go five
minutes four four minutes actually that would hit five hours if we went okay i do have a post
roll ad so uh so so so read slowly give them four minutes should we find one more sponsor now i'm a little uh dubious with this uh source here i'm
not familiar with heat street maybe maybe you know all about heat street and um when they say this
black lives matter person like the leader black lives matter leader i don't know that black lives
matter has like an officially elected leader. So I'm suspicious on that.
Co-founder.
Co-founder seems like leader-ish.
But she says that white people are subhuman and that we have genetic defects.
And she almost makes a valid scientific point or maybe does.
She says whiteness is not humuxness i don't know what that means white
skin is sub humixin all phenotypes exist within the black family and white people are a genetic
defect of blackness she continues to explain her theory claiming white people are lesser because
quote they have a higher concentration of enzyme inhibitors that suppress melanin production.
And they are genetically deficient
because melanin is present at the inception
of life. Melanin enables
black skin to capture light,
hold it in its memory mode,
and reveal that blackness converts
light into knowledge? That part
seems not so scientific.
No, no, no. This whole thing is so scientific.
Keep going. Melanin communicates with cosmic energy.
White people are recessive
genetic defects. That is factual.
It's incredible.
We've done so much with so
little to work with, isn't it?
It's incredible. Wouldn't it be humiliating
if you got totally...
If you were just living in a world
that you think is totally dominated by people
that you see as genetically inferior.
Do you ever wonder how black people continue
after centuries of colonial violence,
genocide, and destruction?
No matter what systems created to make us extinct,
how we keep coming back,
it's because we are super humuxins.
I don't know this word.
It's not a word.
It's a made-up thing.
This is what people do when they don't have this word. It's not a word. It's a made-up thing.
This is what people do when they don't have an argument.
They change the meaning of words so that they can fall back on that.
I would think that this, as an individual,
is a person who realizes they're kind of fucked in the head,
and so they have to project it onto other people.
I'm not totally strange and weird for thinking.
Not at all.
I disagree.
You don't think she's pretty with the microphone? Not after hearing that personality. Jesus at all. I disagree. You don't think she's pretty? With the microphone? Not after hearing that personality.
Jesus. Oh, can't you get
past her personality and judge her skin
deep? She's pretty.
Judge her skin deep? No.
The way
she judges you.
That's just
hilarious. She wouldn't
fuck a white devil, would he?
There's no point.
I bet she really likes white dudes and she resents herself for it oh i bet that's her kink right that like that totally is like like yeah like a republican who hates gay
people right you know they just turn out they've got that wide stance in the bathroom like uh
like the uh whatever that's fucking i use that all the time so it was some preacher who can't
who realized
he was visiting gay prostitutes.
Yeah, I can't remember the name either,
but I do remember the drama.
That's funny, though.
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Really appreciate it.
If you do that, check out,
there's probably going to be a link down there for Hutch's channel
and where you find all of his liberal notes.
I enjoyed having Hutch on the show.
Do you remember when we couldn't have Hutch on without interruptions and all that?
I have a thing. think i'm sorry sometimes sure
what has helped me avoid interrupting is non-verbal reactions you say something i like
and instead of being like yeah i say you know yeah good yeah or if you say something i think
is totally wrong rather than be like no no that's
not it i'm just like you give it up yeah that doesn't seem right and uh and that way i can
like register my thoughts uh with the people the video version anyway but let you finish yours
yeah you should be watching the video version uh check out our patreon you get access to that
video version of the pkn early speaking of that i think this week's PKN was an excellent PKN.
I was thinking about how good
PKN this week was yesterday.
It was so good. I thought
it was very funny. I had a lot of fun
doing it with you guys. So yeah, check out Patreon down below.
It's a couple dollars a month and you get access to
the video version of PKN and all those
antics just as they come out.
But yeah, I think that's the show. PKN episode
322.
Quietly agreeing.