Painkiller Already - Painkiller Already #411
Episode Date: November 9, 2018On this week's PKA, the 38-year-old phenom known as OpTic H3CZ joins the guy after nearly 5 years! And what a great time it was, lots of time spent catching up on all the impressive things Hector has ...been up to, as well as strolling down memory lane about the OG days of YouTube. The fellas further discuss the potential punishments around our "No Rest November... and the first week of December" fitness competition as it is starting next week and then we review some footage of a good ole fashioned toddler fight club.
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Painkiller already, episode 411 with our guest, Optic Hex. Kyle?
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Don't miss Paramount Pictures' Overlord
in theaters November 9th, ratedated R for strong, bloody violence,
disturbing images, language,
and brief sexual content.
Hopefully not too brief.
Violence and sexual content are some of my
favorites. Yeah.
You know what's going to be good if it
says gratuitous violence.
You have to be on the lookout for that word
when it comes to movies. Gratuitous violence
means people are getting limbs, fingers, things chopped off.
I like a little torture.
I like an appropriate amount of torture.
Add some rape, if I'm being honest.
Add something garish.
Rape has to be done in the right context, Kyle.
Back me up on this.
Tasteful rape.
Whoa, okay.
No comment on that.
You want a tasteful rape in your movies.
You know what's convinced me more strongly than anything? waterboarding is not torture is that it's really boring to
watch in movies yeah like that's the form of torture that you're like really like you're
you're wet like it's not as i know exactly i know it really sucks but you know why it's boring
i want like permanent fingernails pulled out yeah It's the unrecoverable aspect to torture.
The whole time, I'm like, wow,
that finger won't grow back.
I feel like I need to protect myself.
That's just...
We started...
Like, whoa.
Favorite kinds of torture, Hex.
Right out of the gate.
What do you do when they want to leave the team?
I'm sure you've done a lot since we had barbecue together seven years ago in northern chicago uh what have you been up to
since then i saw that uh i don't i of the three of us i follow professional gaming the least but
chis linked me to something that like the owner of a baseball team is now involved in what you're
doing it's gone i had no idea it was such a real deal like
like there's an esports arena going up in arlington i had no idea it was this huge
yeah that's uh that's that's uh my business partner neil liebman and uh ray davis they're the
you know they're the owners of the texas rangers uh they're they were interested in esports they
see the movement i mean there's been so much that's happened in esports in the last i don't
know three to four years that it's just been like super, super beneficial for not only the space, but, you know, individuals within the space.
of just processes and you know sort of the blueprint that they created and how we as internet people can sort of you know take what it is and reinvent it somehow that fits you know
our culture our way of consuming content did you have to make like a big pitch to these kind of
like real deal like sports owners or i'm sure they're businessmen too, so they see the potential here
and they want to get in as close to the ground level as they could.
Yeah, and they did.
They were very well researched.
We met with a lot of people, and finally we ended up with this group
because I felt a sort of connection with Neil.
So that's why I chose.
All right, Hector.
That's so cool.
I've heard your story, and I think maybe in my head I blew it up.
So you're literally from Mexico, right?
You were born there?
No, I was born in El Paso, Texas.
Okay.
So to give an example, El Paso is right here where Biggie Smalls is,
and then I live where Bruce Lee is.
That's on the border. Rio Grande,
it separated a bridge. I could get
from my house where I lived
to the United States in 10 minutes
by car if there was no traffic.
So that's how close. I was born in
El Paso, Texas, but my family
lived in...
My mom happened to work in the United States.
So you just happened to be born in America.
Correct.
So you could be president.
Now.
Of course.
That explains why I was confused.
We'll see.
Dude.
I'm in Texas now.
How broke were you?
I think I've taken your story and blown it up into my head into like comic proportions.
Did you have running water?
We had running water.
We, for a couple of years in my childhood we didn't have a a toilet so at night
instead of having to go walk somewhere we would use a bucket essentially i don't think my dad or
mom i don't want to talk about that but i don't think they used that i think it was just for
for me and my sister uh so yeah all right they had a toilet they wouldn't let you use
no yeah i just i don't think that they would want to get up to go walk to you know
around the sort of place where we live to go use the public bathroom essentially
from what i remember and did you always have food yeah yeah we had food it was really thin
food but it was thin you know it was still food yeah no food was always air conditioning
no air conditioning in one of
the houses i remember like towards when i was like maybe seven eight or nine we had ac yeah
all right and then did you did you go to school in mexico america i did yeah i went to school
from kindergarten all the way to seventh grade and then in eighth grade is when we moved to chicago
how was your english i'm in texas now i had to learn my english well it was bad i didn't know any of it i mean i understood
it because of the cartoons that i would watch and obviously i had cousins that lived in there so
they all uh you know spoke english but uh i had to force myself to learn english because i was not
going to be one of the one of the guys that people made fun of for not speaking english
that was always well i've always had this like sort of complex where I'm not, I don't know, I never want
to be embarrassed of myself.
And in this case, kids in junior high, if you have broken English, even some of your
own people will make fun of you because you have an accent.
So within the first six months, I believe believe is what my parents said that my english
was just like you know good and i remember it being being good but not good enough to where
i would be i would i would have like this issue with it but then uh within the next six months
it was all focusing of like on on getting rid of the accent and making sure that it's not there
the only person to this day that says that i have an accent is my my wife judith she's she every so often if i'm done speaking spanish to somebody for like a 15 minute
minute period time and i come back to english like some words will will be like a little bit
accentish in a way so but i was gonna what'd you do career wise before youtube
um at the age of 18 i decided that i was not going to go to college i went to college
for like about a semester and a half uh-huh and i i remember i remember saying to myself i'm like i
am not i am not a student so i'm like all right i want to make money i'm not i'm not gonna i'm not
gonna be poor essentially i want to work with money because i want to make money you know i
want to live a certain lifestyle uh and i said all right i'm gonna work with money i I want to make money. I want to live a certain lifestyle. And I said, all right, I'm going to work with money.
I'm going to work at a bank.
So I worked at a bank as a teller.
And then from there, I was like an assistant personal banker.
From there, I went to work at a call center for Harris.
Remember Harris Bank?
I think it's BMO now.
Yeah, I remember.
So Harris.
And then from there, I went into the mortgage industry from 2003 to 2000 to whenever it blew up, the mortgage industry, because of subprime lending.
Yeah, it was super hot at that time.
I was burning.
I was bringing in like 140 to 150 when it was hot.
And then it blew up.
And then I had to get a real job. I mean, not that that wasn't a real job, but a more level paying job.
And I dropped from, if I remember correctly, I dropped from making $130 to $150, depending on bonuses and how good I was, to $45 a year.
And I had to give back, I couldn't afford my, at the time I had a navigator and my girl, whose wife now had to give back i had to i couldn't afford my uh at the time i had a navigator and my and my girl whose
wife now had to give back her mercedes um so we can must have been made yeah a little bit yeah i
was used to the finer things and then you but was it laid down dude let's explore that for a second
so you say used to the finer things that's only part of it like were the finer things you own like a part
of your sense of self-worth that you had to give back not yeah i mean yeah of course you know for
me it's always been about making sure that my parents sacrifice was worth it you know for for
my dad to leave his mom back and you know only see her like you know once every other year or
whatever and you know and for for my mom to also leave her
family behind, although we have family here and, you know, my mom had, my dad didn't have any
family here. Um, I had to, I always had like this, this chip on my shoulder where I'm like,
I'm not going to let that sacrifice be something because I would never leave my mom behind ever,
ever, ever, ever. Um, and you know, when, when I made it, when I truly, truly made it just
recently, I just, you know, I bought my mom when i truly truly made it just recently i just you
know i bought my mom a house and she doesn't have to worry about a mortgage ever again uh but yeah
it was uh it was it was a self-worth does it have a toilet yeah that would have been
fucking hilarious i bought you i bought you a seven bedroom, zero bath home. Jesus Christ.
Back at you, mom.
In a spackle bucket.
Yeah.
So when were you doing the, like when did you meet Hutch in this?
Was that during your 150 time, your 45 time after that?
Oh, it was way after that.
It was after my 45 time.
Wait.
Because I remember that when I left AIG, which was my final job, and I was the account analyst in the private client group.
So, you know, rich people.
And one of my accounts was Facundo Bacardi, the great, great, great grandson of the Bacardi empire.
So that was one of my clients.
And we had a bunch of clients, but that was one of my focuses.
I had to make sure that all of his art was covered. i had to make sure that all of his art was covered i had to make sure that all of his houses were
covered you know there's the the amount of and you know i don't want to get too much into it
because i don't know if they'll come after me this late in the game but it's been it's been at least
it's been at least 15 years he's one of our patrons yeah that would be like a good one to have uh so so yeah now the the
reason that we moved here is is one of the one of the again one of the reasons why i i had to
be successful and i'll get back to was it me losing a little bit of self-worth and yeah it was
because you know accomplishing a certain level of lifestyle for me meant my parents not having to sacrifice what they did for what they did.
And now the reason that we moved here is a little bit more fucked up.
I was like 12.
I was 12 or – yeah, 12 about to be 13 or 13 already about to be 14.
I don't remember exactly.
But my dad used to – in Mexico, you can just apply to be a cop and you can be a cop.
And my dad did that for a little bit.
And he would do traffic and then he would do cop work, I think, if I remember correctly.
I don't really talk to him about it because I don't have the balls to ask him.
But at one point, he uh security for the lotto and when i say this
is because it's it was like uh it's like i don't know if the mexican lotto is and it has to be it's
obviously way different but you would go to a bookie you would put down your numbers and if
they would run it they would hit it it would be televised and that so my dad would be would do
security for for this you know company i don't even know if it's a company who the fuck knows but on one of the pickups where he was you know walking around picking up the
money uh he got carjacked you know gone gone to the temple the whole the whole nine and i if i
remember correctly from eavesdropping on the conversations and i will ask him i'm fucking 38 now what's he gonna do you
know what's he gonna do uh but if i remember correctly they took him to like a very secluded
area i don't know if it was a cemetery or like a construction site or whatever but
you know my dad thought that that was it for him you know and and i remember i was playing soccer
in front of my grandma's house and he was walking up the, and you got to understand Juarez is a city.
It's got some dirt roads, but they're like way off.
You know, the city is a city.
It's got, you know, cement and shit.
So when he was, he was coming up the hill, he was walking because we didn't have a car.
He had blood coming down the side of his head and I'm like, oh shit.
So I ran to him and I'm like, what's up, man?
And I'm like, man, what's up? What happened? And he's like, oh, I bumped my head on the side of his head and i'm like oh shit so i ran to him and i'm like what's up man and i'm not man what's up that will happen he's like oh i bumped my head on the side of a air
conditioning unit and two weeks later we're moving to the united states so that's that's that's what
made my mom say we're not raising our kids here we got a lot of i bet a lot of that rough stuff
has spurred you on to have a real strong work ethic huh like seeing the sacrifices and and
even the dangers it sounds like that yeah that your parents had to go through.
How many hours do you work in a day?
Oh, my God. What do you consider work?
When your attention is focused on something else, and you certainly wouldn't call it your leisure time.
You're not watching Netflix or just relaxing, watching TV, none of that.
Your focus is is is on
the game right you know making money running running your empire planning a new a new segment
of optic you know just talking with you know your partners that sort of thing uh so so lately i've
been waking up at like 5 36 and 5 36 6 a.m and i spend that time from 6 to like
8 8 30 is like my catch up on emails and and all that um from 8 30 to 9 30 since we homeschool live
i spend time with with judah and and live and then from there i just i come to the office of
this office now which is my my studio and i have. And it's pretty much all go the whole time because I'm vlogging.
Sometimes I play video games.
I haven't been able to play video games in the last two weeks.
But sometimes I stream.
But the majority of my true work is still a little bit of optic.
Not a lot.
But mostly just what my next project is going to be.
Actually, for the first time, when was it? Not a lot, but mostly just like what my next project is going to be.
And, you know, actually for the first time, when was it?
This week, I just closed on my first investment since, you know, since the whole deal happened.
I haven't announced yet what it is, but what I do is I think it's a pretty cool investment.
So, you know.
I'm excited about hearing. I want to go chronologically.
So you're...
What happened here?
You're down to 45.
Did we get past that?
Oh, you work your way back.
You work at insurance.
And somehow...
45 is the insurance.
Oh, okay.
Yeah.
Real quick, though.
Are you drinking a Capri Sun?
Yeah.
That's dope.
I love it.
This is my vape. Oh, is this is my this is my vape
oh that's great so how did you get like into youtube and and growing that because at some
point youtube became not just a hobby but an ambition yeah so when did call of duty 2 come out
that that game right there 2005 okay so in 2005 ish so for four years
before well i started making videos in like 2008 ish so i was already on my way out from the from
the aig world i was already like my brain was just the whole time I was like a space cadet and I was thinking and
I came from a job where I was a top
performer,
you know, company newsletter,
front page, you know,
like, you know, awards left and
right. And then when I came into this
thing, into
IG, I had already been playing video games
and sort of making YouTube videos,
but it wasn't until...
So for two years...
When did the whole monetization
started? When we made...
2010, right?
2010?
You started that.
Yeah. I almost forgot.
I helped. I didn't start it, but I helped.
I led the revolution for MCNs to
partner individual channels for individual channels to be able to monetize their own shit.
Yes.
People don't know how many lives you changed.
No, they don't.
You got to be OG to know.
I'll tell them.
There was a time when to make money on YouTube, you gave your money to Machinima and then they would maybe grant your wish
of uploading that video for most people.
So maybe some people auto uploads,
junkyard, but yeah.
And then Hex worked with them
and I think essentially your position was,
hey, I'm gonna go unless we can work it out
so that my channel is also monetized.
I'll make X dollars, a thousand views
and I wanna make money by uploading to my channel.
And to keep him, they offered him that.
And then because he got it, it extended to a bunch of other people, including me.
Yeah, and it was sort of a deal where we were either going to leave as Optic, we're going to go to another network
or they were not only
going to give OpticJ a job
as part of the deal
you're going to hire
Jay to work in Machinima
and on top of that you're going to give us the
ability to upload videos to
create a sort of mini MCN
to where
my players
will give us you know videos for us to upload for us to monetize and then we
would give them that we would keep 10% and we would fund the team that way we
would fund the travel we would fund at the time that it wasn't really a salary
thing because we were allowing them to upload to to our to our channel it's all
the nature like early Nate shot shot days merc and and all that
um but yeah it was uh yeah i i i i talk about it but i don't remember like how often it is that i
should i should bring that up more you know like people owe me money okay and i want to reparate Well, funny thing about that.
So it was right there in 2009 is when I left AIG.
But by that time, I had already for like six months straight, you think of Grizz and Grizz has 50,000 subscribers on youtube and i remember sitting there if i can pay money to have my my that you remember those flippy calendars that just yeah tiny little things that you flip
i wrote down a whole bunch of ideas there and one of them was i'm like i need to i need to i don't
know why i've never heard of management i never heard of uh of of of an agent uh i don't think
entourage was going on at the time if it wasn't maybe that's where i got it from but i'm like i gotta be zerg riz's agent and first order of business is get them
on game informer they're gonna fucking be ecstatic at the fact that they're gonna have somebody who
has 50 000 people watching them i don't even think that they have 50 000 people subscribe to it in my
head and then i'm like all right that's for business second order business it would be really
cool if we could have something called the zero hour where people can watch him play live and go for
clips and and then i'm like all right cool so you know little by little i was thinking these
fucking thoughts and little did i notice that i invented twitch you know in on that roland
but i think about that i think about about it a lot. At the time,
Twitch wasn't a thing. Justin.TV, I don't think,
was a thing at the time. But, you know,
very early on, I'm like, I got to get
a one-hour a day where he plays live
and people can spectate him like a TV show.
So, you know,
little by little, my productivity started going
down. Judith's working with me at the time.
We both, for the most part, for the
better part of our careers,
we worked together in the same company.
We worked in the mortgage industry in the same company
and we worked at AIG.
I got lost. You and who worked together?
Judith, my wife.
My wife, sorry.
Jude.
At the time, Jude's pregnant with Olivia.
We have a good job to where we can make
ends meet and all that.
Then I leave because of disagreements with my manager. we have you know we have a a good job to where we can make ends meet and all that and then i leave
because of uh of disagreements with my manager right she thinks that i wasn't performing right
i wasn't so i pretended that i was and we had this discussion and we're like all right cool
well you know it's time to part ways so you were depressed maybe i wasn't depressed at all no no
no well you were underperforming at work. You went from star to breakout star.
I think I was in my space cadet mode where I was just daydreaming of different things.
And just I don't, you know, I was like, I don't know.
You kind of mentally checked out a little bit.
Like you were focused on other stuff.
Yeah.
And, you know, I would pay close attention to my analytics.
You know, I got 2,000 views on this sniper clip or in that sniper video.
How do we make that 4,000?
How do we make that same person click the same video twice?
A whole bunch of different things going through my head.
And little by little, worlds collided.
They crashed.
I'm out.
Judith's seven months pregnant.
So now I have like two months severance.
And then for the rest of 2010, there's nothing coming in.
Just the little savings that we had plus her work that she had.
And then Machinima comes along somewhere in that 2010 era.
And I told Jude, I'm like, baby, we're finally going to be able to make money off of what I'm doing, off of making videos for almost two years with no money, no way to make money.
And that's what a lot of people – I used to get mad when people would call you, Woody, like a money whore, that you only did shit for videos.
I've heard that. These kids or these same people don't understand that we all uploaded videos for free for fucking years with nothing but a thank you from the fans at the time.
So it only makes sense that when you have the ability to monetize something and you really want to give it your all, you're going to have to make that your job.
And in order to make that your job, you have to be able to cover your cover you know your expenses you know your dad you know in
your case you're you're you know you live with somebody or whatever the case may be you're gonna
do that if somebody offers anybody that's watching this right now money to go do what they like
whether it's playing soccer or whether it's whatever they're gonna fucking take it okay
so anyway so we did that and and you know for a, she's like, show me the money. And I'm like, yeah, yeah, no, look at this top five kill cams.
She did 1.5 million times 2.5 CPM.
Boom, you were my first one, Kyle.
You're welcome.
Yeah, thank you.
You started it off.
You won the number one spot, FPS Kyle.
I remember that.
And it got 1.5 at the time, 1.5 views.
And I'm like, man, if you multiply it by $2.50, that's like oh my oh my god this one video life changing yeah i'm like holy shit
this guy she's like show me no matter what so sure enough the cutoff of uh from the time we started
to the quarter because it was 90 90 days that they paid was like 16 cents i believe and i was like
fuck you know i've been telling her for a whole year that you know it's
it's gonna it's gonna happen and then all of a sudden 16 cents granted the second one was for
like 26 grand and then little by little yeah it was hard to get motivated right like like yeah
because when you're when you're like you're like the work I'm putting in today I'll get paid for
90 day you but you're not getting it 90 days from today 90 days from today
they'll think about paying you and then maybe two or three weeks from then like you'll actually get
the the paypal uh like like transfer and it was just like god damn it i it's hard to stay motivated
and grind when i'm not getting that instant satisfaction satisfaction not instant but like
any job you know you get paid every two weeks or whatever, right? And you're like, ah, this work I'm doing today, getting paid for it in two weeks.
X changed the world with individual channels getting paid. I changed the world with that.
Like I was the guy, I sat down with the owners and I was like, man, here's some things we need
to do this as a job. One, we can't have this kind of delay anymore. And that's when it became,
you get paid for four weeks and then two weeks later, you get paid for that. And I was like, also, we need predictability in income. The way that you
do it, we look at these things. We don't know which views are mobile, which views aren't.
I want to be able to look at my analytics and predict my paycheck. If I can't do that,
then I can't invest all my motivation into this. And they took that to heart and made a change for everybody yeah and
remember at the time they would be like uh you always have to assume that half of these views
are uk and you guys don't get paid for uk views uh and i'm like okay so you know it's not 1.25
million views it's you know half of that uh do you guys remember that oh yeah yeah
mobile european views like none of those counted.
I remember when people would make videos and be like,
hey, I'd also appreciate it, guys, if you'd not watch on your phone.
I never said that.
I couldn't say little things like that.
I remember people saying that.
I couldn't get away with it.
People were so on top of me for making money on YouTube.
It was something unique to me.
They had extra rules, I always thought, for me.
I can't use the FAMAS.
I can't make any money.
I can't do this. I can't do that.
They were always eyeing me so carefully.
It was the polar opposite of my channel, where I'd
upload the same footage over and over
with just different commentary, and
they were fine with it.
I used to envy guys like you.
Whiteboy used to say, like, hey, you know, if you
could, would you make my
YouTube channel your browser's homepage?
And I was like, I would get roasted for that.
Oh, yeah.
I did that too.
That was my idea.
White Boy and I would brainstorm on these ideas.
We'd be on my back porch at 3 in the morning like,
maybe you could make a whole channel.
Like, it'd just be bugs.
And he was like, yeah, people watch that too.
I was like, yeah, they'll watch it, man.
Let's just look at that bug over there. see that bug that's your first video he's like yeah upload that shit welcome to
bug seventh street my eighth youtube channel 25 000 subscribers the next day quarter million views
do you remember when he would do that with different channels like every other week he'd
be like hey this is cat seventh street And I remember watching his Cat 7th Street growth and being like,
God, I'm getting blown the fuck out by a cat.
There was a deeper strategy to that too.
Because one of the things he'd do is he'd take all those channels
and he'd run a targeted video as the default play on all those channels.
So that would make that targeted video hit certain view thresholds
to get on the youtube
home page and then it would explode even bigger so he with all that you know i may make it up he
had seven channels all pimping the same autoplay it would help him break the threshold to break
oh yeah yeah he he is literally the man bro i the amount of like creativity that went into like how
to get people like to to click was fucking inspirational
if anything else i remember this one time i was watching one of his videos and at the end of the
annotations i clicked on it and it went back to the same video and in my head i'm like uh he probably
fucked up let me send him a message but as i'm writing the message i'm like he didn't fuck up
he did not that's another one of my ideas.
Yeah.
I put an annotation over the entire video screen, a borderless, clear annotation.
Because you know what everybody does?
They click the middle of their video thing to pause it.
They don't go down to the bottom left and click the pause button.
Yeah.
They click it and, oh, the video just started over.
Whoops.
Dude, those are all great ideas. White Boy, though,
got away with stuff that made... Making your channel the
homepage, I thought of that, but I can't say it. There were so many extra handcuffs on me.
Partly because I think I accepted it. In hindsight,
when we ran the money's there, we don't care on the original PKA ads, it was like,
look, we have ads on this show.
Quit your pitching.
Yeah, I never had to deal with any of that.
I always told people, hey, man, I'm here to make money.
As much money as I can make.
I love money.
Don't you love money?
We all love money, right?
Big fan of money.
If you just want to send me money, here's my PayPal.
I'm not going to give you a thank you.
I'm not going to send you a postcard, no ringtones. Just send me money here's my paypal i'm not gonna give you a thank you i'm not gonna send
you a postcard no ringtones just send me money because i like the money did you ever get money
from that yeah yeah people just send me money yeah absolutely i i'd sell my old gear like whenever i
was like like early days like when i was just doing gaming stuff i'd be like hey i'm i'm switching
at from these old astros to the new Astros. I got these old Astros.
Anybody want them?
I mean, if you want, I'll fucking sign them.
It seems weird to me.
Fucking sell them for $300 or $400, shit like that.
Like all my old gear, every old Xbox, PlayStation.
Like, all right, enjoy it.
I never did anything like that.
No reason not to.
Yeah.
You can't ever be like, oh, God, never apologize.
You never apologize for being a businessman or making money
or just trying to support yourself doing what you love.
You can never apologize because then they got you.
I didn't actually do that.
I never apologized.
You are sorry, aren't you?
I just denied it.
Like, Woody, would you still make a video every day if you weren't getting paid?
And I'd be like, you know, I think I would just make it on my own schedule.
I'd make them as my mood struck
instead of a job on a daily basis.
I made two videos a day for years.
I remember that.
You went hard in the paint
for literally years.
I'd sell you a friend request spot.
I'm shameless.
I remember that.
Before I was friends with you
In like 2009 or something
Like I saw one of your videos
And it was like and you can pay me $25 for a friend spot
And even then I was like
This guy's not famous enough to charge
For friend spots
And yet
There you go
I'd make $1000 selling friend request spots
People who did that had unhappy customers a lot, though.
I never wanted an unhappy customer.
Because they'd be a friend spot, and they'd be like,
do you play with all 100 of us all the time?
No, I'm not going to play with any of you.
You just made new accounts, and then would play
with his real friends.
We were talking about that in a
podcast, and
what it was, it was more of a look who I'm friends
with. So they weren't necessarily buying the opportunity
to play with you, in my opinion.
Weren't buying an opportunity to play with you. Yes,
that would be the ultimate goal, sure.
But it was more about people going there and being like,
damn, who's he friends with? Holy shit, how the fuck did you
get FPS Russia on your fucking Twitter?
You know, on that.
Now that I think, I paid to play with Hutch once
and I played with you that night.
You probably don't remember that.
I was no one.
You're welcome.
I had like 200 subscribers.
Hutch wanted money, I think, for an HD.
Oh, new monitor.
He needed a lot to record in HD.
You needed a better monitor.
You needed a better recorder.
You needed a bunch of stuff.
So I sent him money that seemed significant at the time.
It might have been 20
or 50 like but he was only asking for like one or two so i way overpaid and i and i sent him a
message i'm like hey i sent this what i really really want is just to play with you one night
and that was it i feel like now my thirsting for hutch attention is embarrassing but that's how my
whole youtube career started i watched his videos to learn how to play better and as I did, I was
like, man, if he and I were on the same
team, we'd never lose. Because I
thought the videos, the games that he uploaded
were his average games. I was like, yo, we
just win all night long. All night long.
Hutchins, yo, don't miss Sniper and me.
And that was what I wanted out of
YouTube when I first started. Just to win games.
Yeah. It's easy to forget how exciting it
was to have that big YouTuber on your friends list.
I remember when I played that one game
with Woody, Kyle, myself, and Wings,
and I had Wings on my friends list
because he had just added me in the pregame lobby,
and I was like, hell yeah, somebody's moving on up.
And then I ruined the spawn trap in that game,
and he removed me, and that was the end of that
I was on his friends list for about 11 minutes
the first time I ever met Taylor
it was a money thing
it was for March of Dimes
but it wasn't called that
it was like Walk of Dimes or something
but it was with the March of Dimes
I was raising money for children with birth defects
and I think it might have been $50
if you did that much,
I'd do a dual-com with you.
And that was how I first met Taylor.
He donated to a charity.
Yeah, cranial enlargement syndrome.
I remember that.
Well, cranial shrinking.
Those poor little bobblehead babies.
All right.
So, Hex, back on you.
Yeah.
So, you didn't found Optic.
Did Jay found it?
I don't know my history.
I think it was like three people.
Okay.
Jay, crew, and
some fucking
person, some other person. How did you lead it?
How did it...
Everybody left, and it was just me.
So at that time, I'm like, all right, I'm going to recruit my brother.
I'm going to recruit that. And then my brother's like,
we should make videos on YouTube the way that
Grizz is making. And I'm like,'m like yeah we should we're good with the
sniper yeah so we're like we the whole sniper team became a thing just by happenstance that we just
all like the sniper rifle and you know little by little we started you know picking up people and
we played so many 1v1s it was almost impossible to beat us in 1v1s because that's all we did and our advantage was the fact that we practiced with uh no steady aim and um and note that silence uh so when people would come in to
play be like yo take off fucking steady aim and take off uh that silence and then they were just
at a disadvantage because you know steady aim helped a lot back then so um so yeah for for years for years there was there was
you know it was just me my brother and corrosive and like some other people um but yeah no i didn't
but i made it what it is today i remember you made a video in modern warfare 2 and you're like
um we're gonna stop doing the sniping competitive team because nobody can beat us yeah like no
there's just no one out there on the planet who can put a team of snipers because nobody can beat us yeah like no there there's just no one out there
on the planet who can put a team of snipers together who can beat us and it's just getting
old this isn't going anywhere we're gonna we're gonna we're gonna have to just find a new mountain
to climb quit at the top yeah yeah and i was like god damn that's ridiculous like like no one can
beat you and that was the case that was great that was great well it was it was uh again it
was just a we we on we practice and then we made people play with the unfair advantage but even
when they when they when they came on after competing they would still get demolished and
then d treats came along and it was all over that you guys did that to me and i didn't realize what
was happening right like yeah like we're playing on shipment. I'm doing snipers. I'm playing against Hutch and Hex and some other guy.
Like, I got my money's worth.
And, but they're like, yeah, yeah, you know,
these are the shipment 1v1 sniper rules.
And I'm like not putting up a fuss
because I didn't even know the rules.
You know, I'm such a noob.
Now I realize that, like, you were stacking the deck.
I didn't know.
No, I mean, we let people come in, you know,
weeks after they've been practicing rules of the cross. I didn't know. We let people come in weeks after
they've been practicing rules of the cross.
After a kill, you would have to get out
of the middle part of the shipment
so you don't spawn trap.
All these rules that I made up
just because it made competitive sense.
And then little by little,
people started getting better and better.
But even then, when you had Detritus on your team,
it's just almost cheating because he was so good so goddamn good
still to this day but he never played at the pro level right did he well he did he did for the cpl
team yeah he played no not on the first he played in the cpls at the time do you know what his
background was like when he started gaming like like because i i'm very interested in like the
people who are at the tippy top of uh performance in video games like like because i i'm very interested in like the people who are at
the tippy top of uh performance in video games like like how young they started because i was
i know shroud for example his dad was really into pc gaming like like in the early 2000s when
shrab was like five years old or something they had a LAN center set up in his basement with like
five or six pcs in a row with like whatever the best
components were in 2004 2005 he's been he's been making doing flick shots since he was a toddler
right so like like like when you see him now just fucking go off with 60 000 people watching live
you're like yeah this guy was raised from infancy like a spartan warrior fucking do this shit yeah
yeah no he's nasty man and then
when you start thinking about you know counter-strike players that are better than him in
counter-strike then you think you start thinking like i am literally nothing in this world nothing
but uh wings of redemption came to that conclusion fairly publicly yeah, there was a time where he thought
he was, like he literally thought
he was one of the best players on the planet.
And he had a really small world, right?
You know, he would just play pubs
and beat games on the
hardest difficulty. Hector, you might
you probably have never done that, but Wings can.
No, never.
Last campaign
I played was crossing the rhine call of duty 2
but yeah and then when he got youtube famous and exposed to what great players really are
um it was eye-opening for him it was hard to accept yeah no i mean i remember the video we
played uh uh tom you know where the fuck you stream that shit or something and look at that that i will remember that for the rest of my life i will never i will never
forget that and i remember uh i met wings of redemption in person by the way when was it a
couple of years ago and i got him a vip pass walked him in and all the whole night so i think
we we squashed whatever we had, whatever little
animosity we had towards each other at the time because
I was really
at one point, I didn't hate him, but I was like
man, fuck that dude.
Because him and
this dude, Blame Truth. You guys remember
Blame Truth? You didn't like Blame Truth.
I didn't know that. No, of course not.
I'm going to tell you why. Yeah, I'm out of loop.
From what I know,
I might be wrong because it's years
ago. Wings
had him
because he had the gamer tag
glitch where you can change your gamer tag.
So they made a video
of Wings beating me in a 1v1
but it wasn't me. It was Blamed Truth.
And I was like, I've never fucking
played you. Let's go right fucking now. I had no doubt in my mind that i was gonna fucking destroy wings
i mean he's you know he's he's a camper right that's the deal i knew wings well we talked every
day i have never heard that that wasn't actually you oh yeah yeah no wings tradition never beat
fucking optic hex no fucking way wings had this inferiority complex because he'd make these videos
of him sitting in the back of the map with a thermal scope on popping fucking smoke with
scavenger and fucking sniping people at long range through it and maybe getting like a 30 and 3 game
and like dom not playing the fucking objective meanwhile hex and fucking hutch and all the optic
guys and anybody else who like wanted to have their version of what was cool in the game are fucking running fucking like bouncing off you know doing super jumps
360s and like exciting gameplay where and and and they had this little war going on back of words
going back and forth and i have recording does i have recordings i have recording wings cooked up
some propaganda like i have i have a recording of meings cooked up some propaganda, like he does.
I have a recording of me talking to Wings.
He's like, all right, man, let's fucking bury the hatchet here.
And it was one of the first times that I ever spoke to a Southern draw, in a sense. I was just like, all right, slow it up for me.
All right, well, let's talk.
And I'm recording this.
I'm like, dude, why did you pretend to beat me?
You could have just played me and maybe beat me for real i don't know fucking good you are he's like well no yeah the only way i would play is if it's on uh what's that big map where
bog wasteland yeah wasteland that's where you got the it's like grass on the ground this kind of
yeah yeah exactly there let's play on that we'll play snipers only and i'm like that's a big
fucking map no and he's like yeah we'll use uh what was that the baby monitor thing that you
oh my god heart heartbeat yeah yeah heartbeat he wanted to play with that i'm like i'm not
fucking playing that shit come on that's boring man let's fucking let's play let's fucking do
this shit and uh and yeah he ended up uh apologizing for faking it and that was that
so he yeah i mean look it was so long ago i'll never forget
to hear this old stuff i'll never i'll never forget it but dude this could be like a buddy
holly elvis like beef session and i'd still be interested in what happened back in the day
wings wings had beef with so many people oh yeah yeah i knew they had that shit all the time no idea that was fake
um you ain't gonna fucking beat me come on night my prime you see that that's a river city's finest
championship three versus three hardcore tournament win right that's my only one two
time blockbuster champion
exactly um wow i didn't know that like asking like something else about the business like
did it kind of suck when you hand it over optic to uh to that other guy like for majority control
like did you kind of feel like oh my baby's kind of leaving no you're just more psyched
no it was my choice i could i could have had my way any day. The deal wouldn't have gone down unless I had my way. But no, I get to ask that a lot. I look at where I'm at in life and I look at what I've done for my family because I didn't just take care of my mom and my dad, also Judith's parents and our siblings and all that.
and my dad you know also judith's parents and you know our siblings and all that uh and then i think about like what's like yeah it sucks uh some you know how it's gone in the last year but i i worked
at it very very hard i put everybody's you know well-being before mine i there was there was a lot
a lot of times where i was not about to make ends meet i needed 10 grand and i considered asking like like you know nade to let me borrow and he would have obviously given me the money to let
it borrow but i'm like i gotta do this shit on my own you know to be a leader you cannot ask for
help from your you know you have to lead you have to lead so i did whatever it could to you know to
make it to make it work and eventually i did um so can we pause there there was a time when you
were running optic when the players were doing better than you?
Oh yeah, the whole time.
Yeah, of course.
Yeah.
So there was a time where...
I always wondered if that was true.
I had heard that as a truth,
but I thought like, oh yeah, but...
No, it was bad.
These owners are downplaying how much they make.
That's what I thought happened.
You know, I...
I mean, shit. You know, I I mean, shit.
Those countless years where
Jude and I were just fucking stressed out where I was.
Yeah, you're running at a loss because you believe
in what you're doing.
And still, you know, I would
pay myself like the
very least that I could to do
that and all the sponsorship money would go into
salaries and expansion.
Salaries and expansion.
And for, I mean. Since 2010 to 2017, my first employee came in 2017 and that was Jay to come back to help
me with some of the managerial work and stuff.
But I had to stop paying myself and start daily vlogging so I can supplement the
cash that I was getting to live from Optic to pay him that salary. So even to the last
day, to the last year, I was overworking. Not only was I running a business but creating
content, daily content, mind you, both as an you know to to inspire
the players to to you know that if i can do it you can do a sort of shit but you know mostly
because i needed to pay myself and and that's that's how it ended up working out uh but yeah
for like seven years it was just me myself and i and you know it it worked out so i can't complain
right but i don't know it was a lot of times where it was looking grim.
And it would have sucked
because the pressure wasn't just on me
and what was going to happen in my house.
It was going to happen,
whatever happened to Optic
was going to reverberate
across the entirety of the esports realm, right?
Because if Optic,
with the amount of sponsors that they have,
are operating at a certain certain level if at any point
something went wrong it'd be it'd be like red alert like all over the place because it's like
all right well if it's happening it's one of the biggest esports organization in the world
you know with with views that can actually convert into into ad sales you know what's
the little guy gonna do right so it's it was was tough. Do you see any parallels with you taking the investment money and partnering up and what the UFC did with WME maybe?
And maybe just bringing it up bigger things.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So again, I don't regret it at all because the new projects that I'm working on, I don't wake up.
Every single day that I wake up, I'm working towards something, working towards something, working towards something.
And that's a misconception that some people have where they think that once you get money and you're comfortable, it's kickback time.
And I don't know who else I had a conversation with just recently where I said, you know, this past summer specifically, I forced myself.
I forced myself to hop in my pool and enjoy the 110 degree weather with the Texas sun.
I forced myself because I could.
It would have been easy for me to come to the studio and worked on something.
But I'm like, I got to enjoy myself.
I have to enjoy the fruits of my labor in a sense.
But yeah, it was – no, I don't regret it,
but yes, it was rough.
That's what I, I've been anxious to talk about that.
So I found myself in a similar position.
I was kind of heads down for a long time.
You know, like I had millions
and I still lived in that house I bought in 1999.
And then after a while, I was like,
like this isn't bringing me happiness.
I think the thing I want to buy is my time, right?
So that was like my big purchase.
Like, I'm just going to stop working so gosh darn hard.
Yeah.
I guess my question for you is like, how much is enough?
When are you going to buy that?
Someday you will.
It's 70, you will, right?
I think.
Yeah.
What drives you to do another business like or whatever this investment can you give us a hint is it is
it like real estate or is it entertainment somewhere is it it's uh it's a it's it's it's
entertainment okay it has a little real estate component to it um i don't know it'll it'll be
announced very soon i'll tell you off off offline okay um but but there's something that inspires you to roll the dice again because it sounds like there's a risk component.
Maybe you're investing into it, right?
No.
You're not putting your own money up?
I am, but it's not something that would risk anything.
There's nothing but upside. you know, it's once I, now that I've done this, it's like, all right, how do, how do me and my
guys, you know, continue to do this? Because, you know, I don't, you know, it's not, it's not an
alone thing for me. I, you know, I have a team, Seth's right here and, you know, I, I, I bring
him investment opportunities all the time for him just to, you know, maybe say yes or maybe say no,
you know, and, and it's, and it's everything, you know, we just, uh, it's, we just met with a,
with a, with a vodka company. I won't say the name, but we just met with a with a with a vodka company i won't say the name but we just met
with a vodka company that's you know there's an opportunity there and and for me it's like it's
like how can i apply everything that i've learned in the last seven years and then build another
business off of off of that you know from an advertising perspective like uh i i've i've ran
a very very clean camp my entire year to where i didn't i've never been like fucking buy that
and it's a fucking shitty product right i always i it was just not my thing ever ever ever uh you
know when we when we sponsored with people we sponsored and it made sense because it fit the
program and fit you know our lifestyles um so yeah so it's it's one of those one of those things
where i don't know it's really easy working things where, I don't know. So why do you want to keep working?
That was like the core of the question.
You want more money?
You need to be worth.
Yeah, it'd be nice.
It needs to be worth three commas.
Nine digits?
Like that's what you're looking for?
Three commas is a billionaire, right?
Yeah.
That's a lot of commas.
Yeah.
I don't know what it is all i know is that all i know is that up until i
started doing this and all the endless hours from the time i was you know 11 years old and i would
help my uncle carry groceries from el paso to juarez walking like you know 20 miles or whatever
uh and and then you know helping him mow the mow the lawn or going to work with him at the
factory that him and my dad used to work at or helping my grandfather cut up cardboard boxes
and then you know sell the cardboard and then take and go shovel or sweep garbage into the
garbage dumps i've i that none of that work has ever compared to to what i'm doing now because
i don't consider this work because i know what work is
this is like so this is more like a project that pays well you know and so let me ask you this is
is uh is part of your motivating factor to a legacy or is or is or is part of it a fear of
going back to maybe sweeping garbage again someday uh i mean yeah i mean to its very core
i'm pretty you know going back to that or having a worse having my kid do that is just not something
that that that and and and i will say this though like i never had to work as a kid i always i just
wanted to you know a you know i had you know if i wanted to buy something else or you know as a kid
i don't know if you guys can see it anyway so you remember the tops that you spin it and then you yeah so shit like that right some you know for my parents never made
me work it was it was my choice to do that very early on um so yeah it's legacy man it's it's it's
the ability to to be able to take care of my kid and my kids's kids and their kid's kids without bringing you know uh sort of bringing
up assholes right because it's it's really easy to become an asshole when everything's handed to
you and you know luckily my wife and i are on the same boat when it comes to that that you know she
started working when she was 14 you know she worked at mcdonald's and you know she's she's
always been a super super hard worker like me so we want to sort sort of, you know, put that sort of, those sort
of values on, on not only my daughter, but you know, my brother's the same way with his kids
and my sisters and all that. And then on her side of the family is the same thing. Her dad worked
two jobs and, you know, for all their lives. So yeah, it's, it's a, yes, never, I never want any
of my family members to, to grow up the way that I grew up. but on the same side i i sort of feel sorry that
they'll never ever be able to experience what i've experienced because of what it's made me do in my
lifetime it almost seems like it's scorekeeping like i have a bunch of questions let's sit down
like and one of them is how much is enough that's how i phrased it to and it all sounds like nothing's
enough you're just running up a high score at this point it's because money stops having that
like if you i'm gonna make a let's say you're worth $500 million,
and then we increase that to
$550 million.
That hasn't done a lot for you. I disagree with you
on that one, by the way.
At some point,
money is just...
You can go into
Target and get anything you want.
Yeah, but if your standards are that low,
then $2 or $3 or $4 million is... I mean, I can go to Target to target and get anything you want yeah if but if your standards are that low right then then
then two or three or four million dollars is why would i mean i can go to target and get whatever
i want even the tvs and stuff but going from but going from 500 million to 750 million you
absolutely step up to a whole new class of living right like it depends on the things that that you
want in your life like do you do you want a jet do you want a
silly yacht do you want a home in spain do you want a sports team or are you you know it would
would just have i want it all a nice house you know in your the state you live in just one house
and one pool and like one car that that's that that's nice if that's all you aspire to if that's
if that fills you with
complete contentness then of course you're good there but a lot of people are like dude i i want
three wives i want to i want my own island i want i want i don't want one super yacht i want
a fleet i want a super yacht making company you know like all i wanted you'll be a terrible money
right fuck you money to me was defined as like not being beholden to
anyone getting to do what you want to do like it's a fuck you money meant that I didn't I don't meet
with my boss every week and try to impress him right and there is a time at Cisco where like I
guess I still do I think I was smarter than my boss. And every week I would go in there
with like my list of accomplishments,
hoping that I walked away with him
like feeling proud of me.
And it's like, who the fuck is this guy?
You know, like...
He doesn't even own the company, right?
Yeah, like he...
I felt like I did his job better than him,
my job better than him.
Like he was just there before me.
And no offense at tool but uh but um yeah and and i don't i don't want that again i don't want to yeah i don't want
to call it groveling because it wasn't that it was just walking in there prepared with my list
of accomplishments so that he knew that i kicked ass last week and when you get away from that
that's the most valuable thing you can buy
according to me freedom what do you think like let's say you keep skyrocketing hex like you're
you know on the cover of forbes or something in two years what's the biggest thing you can see
yourself purchasing like if you go like uh bananas you know more money than you can dream of are you
the kind of person that would be like hell yeah yeah, I want a dope yacht, or yeah,
I'll get a G6 plane.
I probably wouldn't do a yacht, or
I would maybe do a jet, but
I don't know.
You'd be too small.
An island?
Come on, you want your own sports team?
You want the Houston Astros,
or the Dallas Cowboys?
Ten years from now you
can buy your partner's team right welcome to the optic he bought it to yours flip it on him
you know if someone's welcome to the optic dome home of the dallas cowboys fucking jerry jones
over there crying his eyes out like that's legacy yeah you know yeah yeah what's funny is that the
i'm in texas i don't know if you guys if you guys caught on to that. But I'm in Frisco, Texas.
And Jerry Jones has the Cowboys corporate headquarters like five minutes from where I'm at right now.
I'm part of the private club there.
So there's like an 1,100-person waiting list and all that because of my – I just got pushed up a little bit at the beginning of last year.
And you sort of – What club is this? I don't know uh cowboy club that's what it's called oh that doesn't mean anything to me is it
it's like the soho house it's a perfect like it's more it's more for it's a rich people club
yeah pretty much but it's more for for like you know networking and business opportunities it's
a rich people club what do you do in the Cowboy Club? Do you attend games?
Today? Yeah, you can.
You can watch it. It's a practice field.
You can watch them practice. Today they were
practicing live. You can sometimes see Jerry Jones
land his helicopters.
It was more of a business
networking thing for me than anything else.
But the food there is fucking incredible.
Lamb meatball, shishito peppers, ahi
tuna as starters,
and then you go into the 44 Farms
Medium Well.
Do you pay annually to be a member of the Cowboy
Club? Yeah. Can you share that?
How much that is? I can't.
But there's some membership
initiation
and all that, but I'm trying to get them
to open it up or
lower something a little bit so
young younger people can go in there um because you know at times in the night time it's not as
cool i've been to dinner there with my wife a couple of times it's just like not
could be could be better in my opinion um but i don't know what i would i don't know what i would
buy that'll make me do that i i'm a i like being in this space just because I get to do stuff like this.
I can stream if I want to.
If I want to have a business meeting, I can have that.
Traveling the world and all that doesn't –
so me saying that I want an island almost doesn't even make sense
because how often would I go to the island?
What the fuck am I going to do on that island?
Because I'm not going to be – does it have internet?
It's a question of what makes this up to me. You have homeless people fight to the death on your island? Does it have internet? You have homeless people
fight to the death on your island, of course.
Absolutely.
That would be
crazy.
YouTube would monetize it.
When I pull a lever, the plexiglass floor slides out
and the shark's under there.
That would be my rule of my island nation.
There is no extradition to any nation
on earth, so you're welcome here if you committed a heinous crime, but you have to fight for your right to live versus another person who committed a heinous crime.
Well, because I'm a multi-billionaire.
I want to watch bloody battles in my island dome.
How will your population ever increase if every time someone comes, someone dies?
No, this is my island.
Population one.
It's on a sign when you walk in.
It's just me.
So when he wins, you just snipe him.
It's very lonely.
Just a lonely billionaire
alcoholic watching rapists
murder each other.
That's the life.
Yeah.
Who's the guy that wrote Minecraft?
Oh.
The least creative billionaire on the planet
That's sad sack
I know him as Notch
That's what he could be doing now
Notch made some post online
Like three years ago
And we're still upset about it
Not depressed about it
Just like get out of here you bitch
I just don't know how to be happy.
You know, I got all this money, but I don't have happiness.
That's when we did that bit where we were like, dude, Notch, reach out to us.
Either of us will be your minister of fun.
And you will never have a boring day with us around.
You'll have rapists murdering each other.
You'll have just that's only one.
Whores.
Many good ideas.
Lots and lots of whores. Lots of whores lots of whores the
whores will fight they say money can't buy happiness dude we can hook you up with tons of
pretend pretend friends i don't i don't know i don't know i i you know i i guess there is a
that's that's you you can't buy happiness i i'm glad that i've always been like a really you know fun person i think
that i've i've been very lucky to not suffer with any of that so when you said like were you
depressed i was like no i don't i don't even know what that would it wouldn't what that even means
um so yeah no i i don't know man i what one thing i do want to do uh you know it's as early as
next quarter is i want to figure out a way to go back
to the school that i went to as a kid and just like not only remodel it but like hook it all up
and i'm not fucking paying this for my own lebron no no no he's pulling a scott's tots
yeah yeah yeah yeah now i know i told you that you that you don't go to college five years ago before Optic 100.
Laptop batteries for everybody.
Everybody.
Dude, you know what I used to want to do when I was, I guess, at my most, when I was at my peak?
I wanted to be a commencement speaker.
I was like, I wonder who they have like at Ocean City High School and whether that guy is a better speaker or a bigger deal than I am.
How awesome would it be to return to my alma mater,
high school alma mater, and be the commencement speaker?
But that desire is past.
First speaker, we have Lance Corporal David Stevenson
with his silver star for saving five of his comrades in Afghanistan.
Second speaker, we have Woody's gamer tag.
My high school had like...
He's a 10th prestige, the unexceptional gamer.
He was a 10th prestige in Call of Duty 4, a 9th prestige, yes it was a glitch lobby in Modern Warfare 2.
That's true.
Yes, it was a glitched lobby and modern warfare, too.
That's true.
No, no.
Well, my high school would be like, you know, this guy is in charge of all the parking meters in Ocean City.
The whole town, you know, bought his house in quarters because he's a thief, speaking at our high school commencement.
Like, we didn't have big athletes or real celebrities.
You know, you see, like, Bill Gates or Steve Jobs doing the commencements at like ucla that's not what
my high school was like you know there were people you'd never heard of before and you're
like here's the yeah whatever assistant notable guy we ever got to speak not in a commencement
just generally was that dude with like only a little bit of his lower jaw who scares you out
of smoking yeah i love that guy he's like i used to be like you i thought it would never
catch up to me don't end up like me and it's like you can't even anymore man that scared the
shit out of me if anyone would like to fuck my throat hole it's 14 i'll see you in the parking
lot they don't actually pay me to be here. I'm very depressed. I live in my car.
The batteries
on my throat box are running.
He's selling throat hole fucks for
batteries.
Jesus Christ.
PKA reaches a new low.
Didn't think it could happen.
I'm glad it was with me here
Moral of the story kids
Do not smoke
Get yourself an
eBay vape
Or a Capri Sun
A Capri Sun
I've never seen someone make a Capri Sun
Last that long that's the most impressive thing
He's just
Sucking sugar gas Out of it at this point The smell of Capri Sun last that long. That's the most impressive thing. He's just sucking sugar
gas out of it at this point.
The smell of Capri Sun.
Dude, congratulations on all the
stuff you got cooking.
That's pretty cool.
Can you type in the chat what your next investment
is?
I thought you said you were going to.
I don't know.
Under lock and key, Woody.
Under lock and key.
I misunderstood.
He's dealing with MLB team owners.
You got to be careful with this kind of shit.
Okay, listen.
I will say this.
I don't want to be kicked off the private jet.
All right?
I see where you're coming from.
Yeah, you don't want to do anything.
That must be cool to be on a private jet.
I've never even flown first class.
I don't want to because I don't want the experience that Kyle always describes
and then having to go back to coach.
Dude, first class is wonderful.
And it's not like –
I believe you.
It's not – oh, Skype just said, are we losing you now?
What the fuck was that?
That's literally something I typed to Hector because he said he had to leave at 8.15.
It popped up and it was blue.
Yeah.
No, he's central time.
No, no, I'm good. I'm good, I'm good.
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Can we talk about the fitness challenge thing?
Yes!
Before that, what's the deal with the beard, for real?
Oh, well, last week we made that our Halloween episode,
and I came as Jesus Christ.
And I bought this whole Jesus Christ robe.
It was lovely, and it came with a beard and a wig.
And I used that beard and wig for the episode,
but I didn't know if it was going to be high quality enough
and it was going to work out.
So when I bought that, I also bought this glue-on beard
as well as a uh a professional wig
and i i i just i just had those extra and you know we were an hour before the for show time
tonight and i saw my beard lying there this is real hair and uh and and i was like i'm gonna
glue some homeless person's beard to my face so why didn't you glue the beard for the halloween
episode uh because this is homeless jesus like for the Halloween episode? Because this is homeless
Jesus.
This is not a Jesus beard.
You look more like an Amish Jesus.
It's ridiculous.
This is not what Jesus' beard looked like.
They told me to boil it and that would make it curly.
I boiled it. It just got all weird.
You boiled a costume beard?
It's not a costume beard. This is real
fucking hair.
So some Indian woman had to lose hair, get it chopped off for this bit?
No.
No.
Yeah.
Definitely not Indian.
It smells like grilled water.
It doesn't smell bad?
That's what you're doing?
No.
It doesn't have that immigrant stink to it.
It doesn't smell like curry.
So, yeah, the show was coming up, and I was like, fuck, I'm going to glue a beard to my face because I want to.
And I was trying to get...
It looks good.
It does look good.
Yeah, yeah.
It's going to be hell getting this off.
I use a lot of spirit gum.
I've had prosthetics put on before and used spirit gum, and it does not want to come off.
How long do you think it would stay on there if you just allowed it three or four days of like showering for sure do you think you could make
it to pkn on tuesday you wearing that still could i and would i are two very different questions
taylor fair enough it would be disgusting can you imagine getting out of the shower and it's just
soaking wet and cold on your face well it's starting to curl after three days.
I'm at the grocery store and it's all matted together and shit.
And people are just giving me weird.
No, I'm not doing that.
But, you know, I had a beard, so I thought I'd put my beard on.
That's all right.
Yeah, it's really good.
A little long.
When I came on, I'm like, there's no way, is it?
I'm like, when was the last time I seen this guy?
Not seven years. It that for a while tell me about this a fitness challenge
so you guys invited a man I'm gonna have to decline but go on Kyle would you lay
it out this way lay it out in ten seconds we talked about this on PKN and
at the very end of PKA so I want at least one time for us to say it when people
hear it yes so do it very briefly because i've got a uh hex related question i know we're limited
on time for him so joe rogan and uh on his podcast did this whole fitness thing that we're using the
mz3 my fitness uh uh belt which goes right below on your chest, right below your titties, and it measures your
heart rate. They have a proprietary scoring system for measuring effort. These are called
my zone effort points, or MEPs for short. And every minute that you spend with your heart rate
in a certain level of its maximum gives you a different amount of MEPs for that minute.
Obviously, higher gets more MEPs, lower gets less MEPs,
and resting gives you no MEPs.
So we're competing for most MEPs in a month.
Has anyone died from this?
No, not yet. We haven't started yet.
Taylor's belt is defective in some manner,
and if you want to tweet at my zone,
there will be a link in the description of their Twitter.
Tweet at them and be like
fucking at Taylor or whatever
your... What's your Twitter handle?
Merka Durka. Follow me for the updates.
Yes. At Merka Durka
wants his belt. And then at us all
and be like, we're doing a competition.
We want this thing to work. They haven't gotten back to
Taylor in a timely manner. And they are
holding us up. We have had the delay.
I was ready to start last night at midnight. We were all to get going i'm all chock full of stuff i started anyway
it won't count but i did yeah and i got rowing machines i've got under desk peddling devices
like like i'm ready to fucking go over here i bought the watch that goes with the thing this
is the the my zone watch it was 60 fucking dollars and. And I overnighted it so I'd have it on time.
And it doesn't even matter.
It's like $30 of shipping that's wasted to those people.
So yeah, at them, be like, come on, get back to us.
Because Taylor's Belt is giving him information from someone who worked out in 2015.
Now, they worked out hard.
I was texting everybody like, so are you guys not getting your results right?
Because it says I had a great month in September of 2013.
Yeah.
And I bought this yesterday, so it can't be right.
Did you buy it new?
Yeah.
Yeah, I bought it directly from him.
And so there's something up with the information relay.
He got a fucking refurbished.
Taylor paid full price.
All the people sweat, bro.
And he's got some refurbished model that you people sent him, and we don't care for it.
All right?
We're trying to do a competition here.
There are hundreds of thousands of people who care about
this. We are invested.
I want to die. I'm amped up.
I'm ready to go. There are prizes
that matter for first through
fourth. It's the
three constant hosts on the show
and Chiz is in it too. There's four of us
competing.
The prize that I care most about
is the belt. There's a belt like a world champion
boxer would have right like a big gaudy thing with i don't know medallions on it or something
i would really like to have that that is my my number one thing um and then in the third and
fourth places it's not just like prizes you don't get it's punishments so that is supposed to be a motivator
too people have talked what are the punishments that we've talked about so far beard shaving
which is not punishing to me um eating one of those one chips like that's spicy yeah okay
eating something really spicy uh i like all my ideas for punishments are more content driven
instead of humiliation driven.
And I think that's going to win out in the end with listeners where I think
if you lose,
you have to like make produce and put out there like a five episode YouTube
series.
It can be a solo podcast yourself.
It can be going back to gaming for like five episodes or something,
but you have to put content back up on your channel.
It could be five episodes, 10. I don't't know but i think the loser should have to make content
what if you used your um second channel or you could even use your any channel kyle just use my
channel i don't give a fuck look i'll you make forth any fucking thing you wanted to be because
i'm gonna be first in this thing i'm gonna destroy you bitches woody with his old man heart is gonna
crumble and die away early on he's
gonna blow himself out tear something chiz is probably just going to die okay and and taylor
just doesn't have the time it's it's not even a competition it's it's it's a competition for for
second right now so so i i make fourth punishment whatever you want make make it getting railed in
the ass live on the show. Make it shaving your head.
Make it getting your nose pierced.
Make it getting a face tattoo
of whatever someone wants.
I'll do anything.
I don't fucking care
because I'm not getting fourth.
I'm not getting third.
I'm not getting second.
I'm winning this thing.
Please include this in the montage
if he doesn't win, fans.
Yeah, include it.
Someone's trying to provide
some entertainment here, goddammit.
So you... Talking shit is what you're doing
I like it
I like the shit talking
I hope it motivates you to get a few meps
Dude
So here's what's happened thus far
Taylor's worked with
Ineffective customer support
That's his progress
Chiz and Kyle have spent a bunch of money
on exercise equipment they haven't used.
That's their strategy, it would seem.
I think that's like 90% of the population,
though.
They buy it and they never use it.
And I'm out there testing shit.
I'm doing activities.
I'm hitting the exercise bike.
I'm out there kiting.
Just seeing what kind of activities
provide what kind of meps. Bro. so what i was gonna say is that can't you just get on your on your paramotor
and like shut it off mid-flight no no it's heart rate oh well i think that's what he's getting at
but yeah yeah like i i guess being terrified would work if you could simulate that somehow
but um but yeah what i'm actually doing is just finding out
what kind of things I do translate into
what kind of meps I earn.
I would argue that
it hasn't even started yet.
Buying exercise equipment that you haven't touched,
I'm unimpressed with what you've got going on
so far. I'm not trying to impress you.
I'm letting you know
I'm unimpressed.
I'm not looking for your admiration
Mr. Woody
Well you don't have it that's a good thing
I wouldn't want it
He was bragging about how much his exercise bike cost
I absolutely was not
You were too
You're a liar I was not
I pointed out
I was talking about how much
Chiz's under desk
Exercising machine cost
You got the $40 one I got the $60 one And Chiz's under-desk exercising machine costs. You got the $40 one, I got the $60 one,
and Chiz may have gotten this $300 under-desk peddler.
Oh, I saw that when I was looking at that.
Can you really get something going under-desk?
The thing is, Hex, it doesn't take that much.
So I'm going to share with the people what it does to earn stuff.
You only have to get to 50% of your max heart rate
in order to start earning points.
And so you don't have to be like
blowing yourself out 24-7.
You can do like semi,
a little bit strenuous stuff
and still get yourself to that threshold.
Yeah, that's the kind of thing
I was experimenting with.
I don't want to share the results.
But I was just looking like,
you know, if I do this, what do I get?
If I do that, what do I get?
So you're cheating.
You're getting some advice.
It's research.
This is research.
Anyone can do it except for me.
Cheating by dragging my ass into a field and doing stuff.
Yeah.
Oh, your favorite activity in the world.
It must have been hard.
I didn't actually.
Can we take a minute or two to make fun of Chiz for spending $350 on an underdesk peddler?
That is insane to me.
He's suffered enough.
I bought one too for like $70.
And you can stand on it and do it if you want.
Like, that's $350.
His has an iPhone app that you can use with it.
Mine doesn't plug in.
It just gives you notifications every five minutes.
You're a fool for having spent money on a $350.
The person posted this on Amazon like, you know, it's only worth $25.
Someone, some retard is going to buy it.
That thing looks pretty cool.
I can see why it was attractive to him.
I can see why it's better than mine.
But all I wanted to do is just if you can keep yourself in the MEP zone a lot, I think that's a big part of it.
And part of what I learned was personal to me.
Again, I don't want to share too much.
But how hard should I dread versus should I like?
What kind of points I get on return for that?
I'm out there experimenting.
I've already got plenty of good ideas.
I've picked out a dangerous alley nearby to run in to keep me constantly afraid.
I might go to East STL
and turn text to speech on
and create a Twitch account.
That'll keep me running.
I've seen the kinds of things people type in
to say over there.
Did you see that?
You saw that clip, right?
The guy who was sitting in the DMV.
Is that what you're talking about?
No, this guy that went
trick-or-treating and he walked he walks off he's like give me all your candy you cunt or something
the girl's like the girl's like and then he said you know other shit and the girl's just like oh
my god and then closes the door but yeah i don't know but i don't know about those i don't have
anything about against people i don't think i could ever ever see myself inconveniencing somebody especially a
stranger for a prank you know what i'm saying i just i can never like even those the street pranks
where i just can never see this i don't watch those because it like it hurts me inside i'm like
oh it makes you uncomfortable it gives you a little stomach ache doesn't it where you're like
i would totally wear that band and watch that and beat all of you that's how much my heart races the best the best
example of that there's a show called impractical jokers yes four buddies that will make you cringe
so hard basically like the other three guys are in the other guy's ear and he has to do an
embarrassing thing in public and they are the most embarrassing things you can imagine in public they
are just rough like going
I don't like that expense of someone else. They're making a fool of themselves. Yes
Well is it is that is that how it goes because I thought I saw somewhere where they at they make the dude ask the girl
if she's pregnant and
She was just a little heavy set and I right there. I was like, I'm gonna see that's fucked up
Yeah, cuz you know you if I'm my name all fucking business, I don't need you coming in and calling me fat.
You know what I'm saying?
It's fucked up.
So I know what it is because it was on Netflix.
And I was running.
I'm like, I can never – would never be able to bring myself to do something.
You lost the challenge, Murr.
You got to go fucking pickpocket that bodybuilder.
Yeah.
Oh, you know what?
It's shit like that people have talked about um
i think going on a pka adventure type of trip some sort of group vacation and uh and that like
the it's funded by the bottom half of the group and the top half doesn't have to pay for it we've
talked about that i would like first place to choose it i think that would that would mean a
lot that'd be something i'd really want too because i i would choose a place to choose it. I think that would mean a lot. That'd be something I'd really want too.
Because I would choose a place where we do something, right?
It would be some sort of zip lining
through the South American rainforest
or we could go skiing up north.
Kyle, you cannot lose this competition.
Yeah, if Kyle wins,
it's going to involve Uber Eats
and Magic the Gathering or something.
It's going to involve something you'll
hate i can't imagine what that'd be i can't what is something oh i'd love that give a good one oh
oh there'd be there'd be casinos there'd be bright lights there'd be crowds it'd be great
oh there'd definitely be it it would be very fun yes i'd be down with that one as well that would be
very interesting winner first place is where we go vacation yeah i like that idea
damn it i know i'm not gonna win you're the favorite taylor everyone is picking you to win
they don't realize the time difference that like available time that i have compared to you and
kyle like it's just i some people have said. I think that if I look at the crowd reaction,
I have.
Pretending this is like college football rankings,
Taylor's in first place with like 60 first place votes.
Kyle's in second with also a bunch of first place votes,
like 30.
And then it's me and then Chiz.
And there's some variations on that.
But by and large...
They don't give us all full credit, huh, Woody?
No, no.
They don't think that I can...
They don't know. I don't think that i can they don't
know i don't know either it's gonna be it's gonna be so it's gonna be me chis woody taylor that's
what's happening you think taylor will get last i i think so i i don't think he has the time i think
that's that's a i i was surprised when he even agreed to this thing he he has met at max like
maybe two hours a day that's just not going to cut it but
i'm gonna i'm gonna do something as a counter argument let's pretend we had been wearing these
things for some time now taylor would have won october september august july all the way back
for the last year right yeah like if there's suddenly gonna get fourth will we play maybe
yeah absolutely well yeah well i mean that that's inconsequential that that's not i just don't want So you're suddenly going to get fourth when we play? Maybe. Yeah, absolutely you will.
That's inconsequential.
I just don't want to come in fourth.
You're going to have to work hard.
That's my only goal.
I don't want to make ten podcasts by myself.
Oh my god.
Is that a thing?
No, we haven't figured it out. We haven't decided it.
I think that's a good one because it is entertaining
and it forces content.
It doesn't have to be a podcast that was just one idea like it could be a solo podcast it could be pka plays with just you playing and maybe
another one of us will jump in to make it a little more fun like that seems like the winning thing
here so yeah i don't think i could do a paramotor vlog that wouldn't be fair but in my head i'm like
well fuck i might fire up cod again do some old yeah woody's gamer tag
videos a lot of people have asked for what's the last time you played cod i haven't played games
until just a few days ago when i started playing left 4 dead um but people have asked for a truck
vlog and a motorcycle vlog for a while so that might work those in there if i were to lose
yeah i've been playing a ton of cod i love the COD. I think it's the best Call of Duty in
four or five years. It's excellent.
Seven, bro.
When was Modern Warfare 2 out?
2009?
Yeah, it is.
I don't know.
I try to play,
but not as much as I used to.
Which one of you guys?
Are you guys still all creating content or no content no no no this is just playing for fun just love it just fucking love i make one
paramotor video a week and then the show yeah speaking of content you just started a podcast
recently right yeah the eavesdrop podcast what is it a like gaming specific more business talk
like general discussion what's kind of the genre you're going for so what i was thinking is is gaming was sort of a bridge that brought
together a whole bunch of people from all corners of the industry whether it's a pro player uh to
ceos of companies so i was thinking you know for example with whiz being the head of of gaming at
youtube and google that was like a
first one i had easy access because he's a friend of mine obviously nate shot scumpy um vonderhaar
was a was a was a good one i didn't really get to spend that much time with him because it's like
the launch week of it so uh you know hopefully i could get a follow-up with him and really dive
deep into like you know more meaningful questions about him because he he as a person like it's super intriguing to me um not that it keeps you up at
night or i'm like oh shit i wonder what he's doing but you know anytime he's in the conversation i'm
always like ah you know so so many questions and then hasbro that i have uh sundance sepso ready
to go i have like you know people all from all over the industry, content creators, the whole nine.
But yeah, mostly
life in general, just lifestyle.
That's cool. Have you ever had beef with Hastro?
And I just ask because that can be natural when
you guys were competitors for quite
some time. I mean, we still are.
Uh-huh.
What does Hastro do? He's the CEO
of Team EnVyUs and the Dallas
Overwatch team, Dallas Fuel.
I actually just had him on the podcast.
A fan asked us, how competitive are you two with each other?
We're friends, and this is the answer that we gave.
We're friends, but competition is competition, and we don't let each other off easy.
There is a high level of competition
between he and I, of course.
There was a time when there was almost cooperation.
I used to think of EnVyUs and Opticus
as sister teams in the COD world.
Do you have players go back and forth?
Say it again.
You remember Eon Interactive?
Oh, that's right. Yeah, yeah.
So it wasn't necessarily sisters.
People called it that.
And that was one of the things I didn't like about it.
But yeah, that ended up not working out.
But we both made, well, he's down the street now, like half an hour from me.
He's in downtown Dallas.
His whole setup is downtown Dallas.
So it's really weird that we both ended up fighting for the same state almost.
So it's pretty weird that we both ended up fighting for the same state almost. So it's pretty cool.
Yeah.
Is your podcast in person, kind of like Joe Rogan, or is it remote, more like this?
It's never remote.
It's always in person.
It's almost a traveling podcast.
That's cool.
We put everything in a Pelican case, and me and my camera guy just go well
look we're in episode the next episode is going to
be episode number eight and it's going to be the third
actually I was going to say it's the third one
out of my office but it's not this next one's
at the person's like studio from
where he creates content out of
so the next guest is Castro the FIFA
streamer are you guys familiar
I'm not familiar no he's got
he's a player. He's definitely
a big player in the FIFA world.
Him and then
LunkersTV. Rob from UMG.
The website, UMG. You guys remember that?
No. I do.
I remember UMG.
So UMG, one of the early investors
is this guy named Rob.
He invested a couple of tens of thousands into it and then walked away when he got paid out.
And he started making YouTube videos at the beginning of 2016, fishing videos.
And he just passed a million subscribers.
Fishing content?
All fishing.
Fishing and hunting now.
But it started with fishing bass fishing specifically um but yeah he and i became really good friends during the
during the umg days and i would make him i would make him but i would ask him to throw a tournament
in orlando so we can go fish lake okachobee and you know with scott martin who's a professional
you know fisherman and little by little we started like developing this friendship
and then you know he said so yo i want to i want to do you know i want to make fishing videos like you because at
the time i was making you know fishing videos but not as consistently as i was anything else and
then he started and fucking blew up sells out of rods sells out of baits sells out of at at at uh
at bass pro shops um when he started taking off i'm like dude you guys are on the verge of
disrupting the fishing industry
the way that
influencers disrupted
competitive video games in a sense
where everybody was sponsoring the players
because they competed
and then we sort of come along
with this new model where
guess what our pro players are the
influencers check them out and you know same sort
of thing uh but yeah it's been it's been a really cool so he's going to be like this the the guests
two guests from now thank you so much because you just gave me my idea for what we're going to do
when i win this competition what's it going to be we're going fishing oh that'd be for sure for
sharks oh i've done that before.
I'm totally down to fish for sharks. Is that like your big leisure activity,
Hector, fishing?
Yeah, but one of the
main reasons why I moved to Texas, but I haven't
fished at all this year,
unfortunately. That sucks.
It's like it's November.
You really have to fish.
Well, it's about to start getting hot, man.
This is when it begins.
Does it?
Hector mentioned MLG Orlando.
I went to MLG Raleigh with Hector, and he hooked me up.
He gave me VIP passes.
I got good seats for every time people played, and it made me feel special.
But the thing that made Hector so cool in my eyes that day is he saw Pistola.
And he walks up to Pistola, and the two of them do a secret handshake.
And I'm like, oh, he's so cool.
We still do that handshake every time we see each other.
Yeah, that's good.
What is he doing now?
He's still competing.
Yeah?
Does he still play halo
yeah halo halo's still uh an e-sport that you know that that's uh that's good it needs it needs
some work uh but yeah it's good uh optic just won a halo championship about two years ago
the world championships it was pretty cool uh they gave me a championship ring um which was
fucking phenomenal you know. And it came from
343 themselves because the players
asked, and I was like, man, that's
good. I need
my fucking Call of Duty one. Where's my
Call of Duty one? I'll buy it. God damn it.
Just fucking give it to me.
We finally
get a championship, and
it's good.
Nice.
But Texas like such an
esport forward thinking town that there was no other way that i could pick anything else especially
here in frisco man the mayor uh like everybody's all about esports the building that i'm fucking in
i'm on the second floor floor three four and five are are all gearbox so the makers of borderlands one and
two and every time i'm in the elevator i'm like borderlands three and they're like not that i
played i've never played it but they're like we don't know we don't know what we're doing we don't
know we don't know what we're doing uh and then below there's a there's a coffee place called
nerdvana which is all it's like gaming like board games you know like shoots and ladders magic this gathering and
like really you know games that i personally don't play but it's really cool and then next
door is a bar which is nirvana food and spirits which is like a restaurant bar and it's all video
games there's a console at every booth uh you you go to the bar and all twitch streams it's pretty
dope that's awesome where do awesome. I wanted to ask you
about this. What do you think the future for
Battle Royale games is in the competitive
scene? How do they make that work? Because I
watched the Dorito Bowls tournament
or Dorito Bowl tournament and
what they do is
you drop into a pub lobby
and you go for as many kills as you can
with your team of four pros.
And that's not a fair playing field it's it's it's so it's so hit or miss like like maybe you get into a lobby
of it's i think it's 88 players and squads maybe so maybe there's 84 dumbasses in there or maybe
you drop into a lobby with 84 badasses like it's it's really not fair now i i do think that the
best team won that yeah but but that it could have been much closer like like if I don't remember what the gap between second and third was
But I doubt it was as wide as the gap between first and second no it wasn't that it wasn't that that wide because
So yeah, look I've I've I've had this in my mind like forever, and I always bring it up
I I've had this in my mind forever, and I always bring it up. I think Battle Royale, there is going to be a way to make it competitive
once they figure out point systems.
But you always are going to have this sort of luck involved.
If you have two scumpies, for example.
And I say that because he's streaming right over there.
If we have two scumpies and they
each drop right same level same like a literal clone the everything about them is exactly the
same if if they fall into the same house one lands roof one lands you know bottom floor one
might run into a gun let's let's let's switch it even even more more common sense let's say i
drop top floor and get a gun he drops bottom floor and has no gun i'm gonna kill him because
i have a gun right i'm i'm gonna have that over him so the rng in the game is always going to be
the toss-up of is it really competitive when luck is involved um yeah sure sometimes there's a there's
a hail mary that's thrown sure there's a
three-pointer that that's tossed up in the air and sometimes it's luck but you know there's elements
that make it not be luck as unfortunately it isn't battle royale why is it a bad idea to just
have them play against each other right you know even then though then, the same scenario I just said, you know, group.
Run it back.
Instead of single elimination, right?
You know, play four times.
First place is one point.
Second place is two points.
Lowest points at the end of the day wins.
Yeah.
Average, right?
But even then, what if four times that weekend you land and there's no loop?
Then you're the kind of guy who makes excuses, right?
No, come on.
Really?
I think so.
If you land...
You know where the loot-rich areas are?
No, no, no, no.
Go on.
Maybe I don't know what I'm talking about.
I mean, especially in COD,
there don't seem to be necessarily loot-rich areas.
Like in PUBG, it's like, oh, yeah, if we go to this area,
it's more likely there's level 3 gear,
whereas these little farmhouses are more likely to be like pistols and shit but in cod there could
be a it's very random you never know where the good shit's gonna be it could be anywhere it
could be one house could have an entire kit you know rifle with all the attachments and an optic
and level three like armor and a couple stuns or something, which are super OP in COD. Stun grenades, nine bangs,
all that shit. That's how I lose.
When I play solos, I'll drop, get
four or five kills, go to the
next circle, the next circle, get one more,
two more, get a snipe, think I'm going to
win, and then engage in a gunfight.
The guy takes cover, insta-heals,
stuns me, and just kills me.
It's GG. That was probably his first kill.
But he's got an advantage over me because maybe
he hid in a house for the first two circles
and nobody shot at his armor whereas I've been
getting gunfight after gunfight my armor's
gone I can't get new armor
so would you say that as you engage you get weaker
yeah yeah it's
a game that like those of us who have played it a lot
realize that the more engagements
that you seek the more aggressive you are you're actually
putting yourself at a disadvantage because that armor gets blown off of you and
unlike pub g where the armor has the armor has a lot of durability but and but but sort of
consistent damage um um reduction based on which tier of armor it is whereas in cod it's got very
low durability comparatively so almost every single gunfight unless you snipe the guy in the
head with a sniper rifle and insta kill him his armor is destroyed like like in your gunfight like
every gunfight like like that's the main call out that we're always it's we're given three or four
call outs it's like armor's broken guys down guys finished it's one of those three that we're
constantly communicating back and forth and armor armor gets broken every time and you hear it when
when you break a guy's armor it's you know when you've broken the guy's armor and it happens every fucking time so
if you're if you're if you've been in a lot of gunfights you've got no armor but if you're like
that mechanic i think that's i don't either yeah so traditionally before uh battle royale games
there were like hunger games in minecraft and uh you know if I kill four guys, then I have like the accumulation
of all the best stuff I got
on all four of them.
And it makes me stronger.
If every time I engage,
like if it rewards me hiding,
then that's bad gameplay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, it lends itself
to be fast paced
and really call it.
Like it's the only thing
I've played since the game
has dropped.
I haven't played multiplayer.
I haven't played a single game
battles match. And it's the only thing I've played since the game has dropped. I haven't played multiplayer. I haven't played a single game, Battlesmatch.
And it's the only one that
the game that's like...
I needed that refresher in the game.
And that's all I've been playing because it's the same mechanics
and it's just
better, in my opinion.
But yeah, up until that
I played Fortnite for a little bit, but once
the building got to the level that it got, I just
knew that I was not going to be able to be competitive.
And instead of...
I didn't have the investment hours to put in
to be decent enough to feel as though I had a fighting chance
to where I'm just like, yeah, forget it.
But it was one of my favorite games.
I called it the best multiplayer in the last five years.
It was that good.
Did you guys play Fortnite at all? I was pub g that like making the switch from sort of i won't call it a
military shooter but i guess it kind of is in a lot of ways to go from that slow paced methodical
kind of thing with lots of communication to like let's just fucking rapid fire build and jumping
around and flying it was it was too much of a pace gap for me and honestly like and people don't like to hear this i didn't care for the look of the game like like that sort of cartoony kids kind of game like
just the palette it just didn't didn't look nice to me whereas i really like pub g i run pub g on
sort of medium high settings i want my frames but i also wanted to look good and i just prefer pub
g over fortnite but now that cod's out i i haven't gone back to pub g i guess i will
maybe when the new map drops but still like cod is it cod is so good yeah i'm only gonna play pub
g on on the mobile device because of of pka yeah make sure you use your code yeah no i'm definitely
gonna use the code but aside from that i i it's just too clunky for me i and then when you play
and i played it i played h1 uh but it was always just like man it was like
are we going backwards here like what's why why what is it so when when call of duty finally
announced that i was i was just on cloud nine man i'm like oh my god this is gonna be incredible
and sure enough man yeah like little things here and there i know the shit out of me but
it's it's it's everything that i ever wanted in a br for Call of Duty. You know what will fix the armor thing?
Oh, go ahead.
To fix the armor thing, every time someone dies,
they need to drop an armor shard, okay?
And, like, you apply that armor shard to your armor,
and it repairs it by a certain percentage.
Oh, same way, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Four shards will, like, get your level one back up to full strength,
or, like, whatever, something like that.
Some way to repair armor. Or maybe if you've got five shards, you can just one back up to full strength or whatever. Something like that. Some way to repair armor.
Or maybe if you've got five shards, you can just
fabricate a suit of armor. Something like
that. Some way to rebuild your armor.
You know, anytime I have an idea
like that, I'm like, David
Von Der Haar already thought about it. That's the reason why he hasn't
put it in. Yeah, maybe. Maybe they can't
implement it. Maybe it was unbalanced.
Maybe people would, you know, maybe
there's not a way to keep people from just having like six armor shards in their pocket and
technically having an extra suit of armor on them all the time i don't know you know but kill
confirmed where they drop the dog tags and you pick it up again and there's a section rescue
variant that has it too i made a video saying they should do that and in fairness i think i
got the idea from reddit but uh when they added it to the game tons of people were like they stole that
from woody they need to properly credit woody i wonder like if they got it from me because i think
some of the specific like dropping dog tags was literally something i said it's been a while
but yeah i wonder if they heard that idea it would it yeah they probably did man they they
watch and listen to everything and everything is implemented and it's if it's in the public domain it's you know obviously oh i'm not
looking for a no no i know royalty or anything i just wanted to look i invented twitch man you
are the same thing oh when you were talking about that like your um influence and on the world
there were a lot i did this thing called commentary march madness and it basically just
gave a lot of small people a platform to get known yeah i wonder if that altered the trajectory of
um what's his name like xx fuzzy games or something like that the he's a big guy at twitch
fuzzy otter balls fuzzy otter balls he got justin wong yeah yeah he first got kind of elevated into
a person that people know by doing really well in my competition i think he got second um there
were a bunch of guys captain sparkles might be one of them like jizz um there were a ton of people
who got much more known through commentary march madness than they would have otherwise
and i wonder how many life trajectories it improved it altered yeah yeah yeah i remember a fuzzy i mean he's i still you know we're we're friendly
we said he was i saw him at twitch con like last year we talked and we you know we follow each
other and shit but that dude has always been super super funny so like i i you know that sort
of exposure helps people when they when the talent is actually there
and if they apply themselves
with the most recent exposure
that they just got.
Exactly.
It's not that I made him successful.
That's not true at all.
But I was one of the rungs on the ladders
that he used to get to the top.
I just feel good about that.
Yeah.
Just another question about the whole
thing. Chiz wrote, without Commentary March Madness,
he wouldn't be married to his current wife.
Can you lay that out, Chiz? I'm dead serious.
That has me interested.
Sorry, I cut Taylor off. I'm sure it was
pretty awesome. But this is too.
Oh, the fame of Commentary
March Madness got him to meet his wife.
I knew I altered his trajectory.
I hope for the positive.
They got married the other week.
Oh, well, congratulations.
Anyway, Taylor, I'm sorry.
Oh, yeah.
It was just like a...
I don't know much about the whole professional gaming scene.
But now, like Chiz was telling me,
there's a new trend where like...
Before it was like Optic versus Envy us.
And it was like people from all around the world.
Like there wasn't any geographical you know uh oneness
with it but now like optic owns uh yeah no regions you know and so now optic owns you know the houston
outlaws and envy uh apparently owns dallas fuel like it how does that all work and this is clearly
the future of it like it's going to follow the same archetype as normal sports i would think
right it's a keemstar idea right well he i think it right? It's a Keemstar idea, right? I don't know.
I think it's always been discussed, but
Keemstar was definitely the first to do it
in Call of Duty. He had the
New York...
What was it? It was good, though.
It was the New York something
and then he gave them worker
suits or something like
a construction worker.
Anyway, it was very good he's talking
about though like no i do i know yeah i do so he called it the new york something so so he made
his team belong to the city that he was from uh what what we're talking about now is is regionality
or assigning regions to esports teams for example haster as he just mentioned, owns the Dallas Fuel, which means that Dallas belongs to Dallas Fuel
the way that Fuel belongs to Dallas.
Houston Outlaws is my team,
and it's the best branding in all of the Overwatch League.
Nobody can compete.
When you think of Texas, what do you think of?
Give me the main thing.
Outlaws.
Okay, yeah, but...
Steers.
Cowboys.
Cowboys, right?
Have you guys seen the logo?
Can somebody bring it up?
It's incredible, man.
It's...
Oh, that's with the two guns?
That's an awesome-looking logo.
Two revolvers with the long horns, and it's genius, okay?
That's a legit professional sports logo.
That's better than most professional sports teams.
Is there a link that I'm missing here?
You need a mascot.
I just Googled Houston Outlaws.
So it's nasty, man.
It's such a good logo.
We sort of had a misstep in the way that I wanted to brand it
because I wanted it to have a capital O and a capital T in Outlaws.
In fact, the reason we picked Outlaws was because – or the reason I picked Outlaws is because it had an O and a T in it.
And I'm like, okay, we're going to pay homage to Optic with a capital T.
Some of the names that were on the table, two people, one of them wanted to call it Hype.
And the other guy wanted to call it
nova and i'm like what the we're not fucking calling them that oh those have been terrible
names i agree well look man some people are creative some people got it some people don't
okay period so anyway so so we have the houston austin and San Antonio region.
So although we're called
Houston Outlaws, we have
those three major cities.
A bigger team, obviously a bigger fan base.
But
it's
that sort of model.
There's the London Spitfire,
which is Cloud9's team.
They're in London, obviously. The New York york excels here i mean you name it they're they're they're assigned
regions so and and originally i'm like uh i was on the fence about it i could have fought both
sides of the argument i'm like yes of course it's going to work you you know your hometown pride and
all of that obviously it's going to work but at the same time i'm like you know this day and age
of the internet and and that why would we segregate ourselves to one city and and sort of alienate and you know the
surrounding areas uh so you know for example why would we as optic not want to have dallas
not like us oh you know i'm saying because we're not from dallasTic, you have the most to lose, right? Because when I think of COD teams, there's OpTic, there's Envy,
FaZe is up there, and then, I don't know, 19 other ones,
like something like that.
So when you become –
100 Thieves.
Snakeshot now has its own team.
Yeah.
But let me continue the thought.
But if you suddenly become like OpTic Raleigh, it's like,
holy smokes, what am I doing in that market?
I used to own the planet
and now I'm, you know,
one third of North Carolina.
Yeah, I don't know.
Again, I can fight both sides of it.
But, you know, it showed itself to be,
you know, a smart idea
because when we would throw viewing parties,
we had like 800 people show up
to like this warehouse to just all sit there
and watch them compete,
you know,
10,
10,000 miles away or not that many miles,
but you know,
in,
in,
in LA.
And then,
you know,
eventually it's going to get to the point where there's going to be a
traveling team where,
you know,
just like traditional sports,
essentially again,
uh,
the,
the,
the secret.
And I,
and I, and I have a solution in my head the secret is
going to be how we reinvent that model that traditional sports have already had with the
traveling uh but yeah but this i feel like we didn't get a chance to explain keemstar's idea
it was this it wasn't that he just had a team and called it the new york team he wanted to make a
league that competed with mlG at the time.
And instead of teams just because the problem he was looking to solve was that people look at this thing and they don't have anyone to root for
by default.
They don't know where to get started.
And he's like, if teams start having regions,
then a new person can walk in there and start having an allegiance
and getting involved.
It breaks that barrier on how to start getting into esports. It was a pretty
good idea. It was
hard to be his partner.
Are there separate teams?
Are the Outlaws made up of
members of OpTic or is it a totally
different team? It's a completely
different team.
It's a team
full of professionals
in that
category, in
Overwatch. You know, as good as
somebody is in Call of Duty, like Seth, for example,
I mean, I guess if they applied
themselves, they could get there,
because if you look at Karma, I got that,
you know, it's a three-time world champion in Call of Duty,
has a 17, well, had
a 17 KD on
Battle Royale Blackout
during the beta.
For him, it translates being able to
go from controller to keyboard and mouse
and still dominate the way that he did.
Seth has the same sort of...
I think it's just a video game hand-eye coordination
thing.
Every player that I've
seen go from controller to mouse
that's a professional does really,
really good.
On the other
side though, players
that use keyboard and mouse haven't had as much
success playing in console because
it's just completely foreign to them.
But we haven't really seen
somebody that's gone that far.
Yeah, watching Shroud try to play
on PlayStation when the Blackout
beta was out was a little frustrating.
You're watching him have a real hard time, and it's like, oh, man, when this comes out on mouse and keyboard, he's just going to dominate this.
But he was struggling a little bit with the PlayStation controller.
Yeah.
He's so nasty, man.
I watch him, and I get mad.
I'm like, God, give me 10% of that.
He's not just good he's
creative i and that's what makes him so big in that space as a streamer is like he won't just
kill you he'll he'll fucking style on you yeah he'll fucking do something that you've never seen
before like like if he's in a fight with three guys like he'll find a really creative way to
make that happen his movement is good like every aspect of the game, he excels in right away.
It's not just about how quick can he
flick to a guy and put bullets on target.
It's his movement vertically,
up and down and left
and right, the way he scales a building.
He'll zip line up on top of a
house, jump, do a 180, come down,
kill one guy while he's midair, kill the second.
And he knows just when to get into cover
before he dies. It's very fun to watch. I love watching these streams. It's an artwork. Kill the second. And he knows just when to get into cover before he dies.
And it's very fun to watch.
I love watching his streams.
It's an artwork.
I mean, if you look at Ninja, the reason that he has the success that he did is because he had the same sort of mentality.
It was all about style.
And in a game where everybody's playing it, it was a recipe for success for him.
Yep.
Yep.
Ninja's got a real – I saw his new streaming setup the other day.
He posted a picture.
He's got a really badass room to stream from.
It's incredible.
Behind him, there's screens behind him
with his logo, plasma screens.
What's dope is that they're not just all lined up,
like six of them.
They're like this.
It's all uneven.
Sick, man.
Really, really cool. I wonder uh red bull helped them with that um i don't know it didn't seem to
be that branded you know it was like his brand does red bull give real money now i want to say
correct me if i'm wrong on this nadeshot had a red bull sponsorship but it was almost at first a pride of being red bull and not really big payday yeah
um it's a little bit of both back then i mean now i'm i'm sure that they that they're that they're
doing right by it but you know it is a pride thing with with the red bull athletes man like
they treat all their athletes like good for life it isn't just like a like a thing they create a
really good culture behind behind the meaning of being a Red Bull athlete
So if you came from the halo era
Specifically and you saw people like while she you know a flame sword
That became like the ultimate I made it so it translated to Call of Duty and when nature became that that was like wow
Bro, like we made it we made it and then when they put flamesword in one million of these
cans for destiny um that was also super super super cool so i'll always have like deep deep
respect and admiration for their esports program how does like uh trading players work is that the
same as traditional sports where it's like all right now optic is trading optic someone to phase
for this and then it's like all right you
got to change your gamer tag and you know you're you're out of here first contracts well yeah you
transfer contracts you buy out contracts uh you know some some people have you know three years
their salary as their buyouts there's been you know massive massive like some multi-million
dollar like buyouts for for single players and does that ever get nasty? Yeah, of course.
I bet it's like regular sports where it gets totally nasty.
Is there a spending cap
where there's a salary cap
to prevent a Yankees situation
where it's like, oh yeah, that guy's good. I'm taking him.
Sort of.
I think it's only
in an esport. I don't know if
I'm allowed to say it, but yeah, there is.
There are some rules. It depends. I don't know if I'm allowed to say it, but yeah, there is. There are some
rules. It depends.
I think it benefits...
I don't know. There's incentives if you don't
spend as much as others.
That sort of scenario.
But not necessarily a cap, but definitely some
regulation there and
use that term very, very loosely.
Okay.
Back in the day, Hex, you used to
intentionally stay
away from player trades. That was like
players figure
out who should be on the team, not me.
Yeah. Still.
Because there's money
involved now, more than there used to be, right?
Yeah, but
it's...
I will never... I mean, I'll help
with the transition. I'll try to mediate
if there's a problem. I'll try to keep the team
together as much as I can. This team
specifically right here, the Call of Duty Dynasty,
the best team that's ever played together,
the scumpy, the
crimson, the karma, and the formal,
I didn't want that thing to be separated,
but they got to the point to where the players just
weren't getting along, and after months months and months of trying it just you know
It just it just had to happen and you know we traded we sold we bought it was it's it's you know
It's a real business. You know video games are serious if it's the business of video games
But yeah, I mean if you look at if you look at contract
If you look at contract, if you look at contract negotiations, if you look at player options, buyouts, free agency, like it's as professional as it gets, man.
Yeah, I thought maybe you'd have to be involved now because, you know, they might want some, you know, $2 million a year COD player and you have to say, yeah you sure we can't win the team we have now
no yeah in situations like that like obviously we we all come to an agreement and it can't be
it sometimes it's gotten to that place where well no we can't we're not going to spend 800,000
to buy out this player to pay him 800,000 a year that's a 1.6 million dollar investment
fuck that you know let's let's try to figure a different alternative but
uh you know for the most part players have always been really really good at in call of duty
specifically they've been really good at understanding uh the benefits that comes with
you know sticking together and building a brand together it's scary so after the raleigh event
uh you guys didn't win and uh if people don't know optic is looking to win every event right they don't take
home third and be like well that was still pretty good right that that's not how optic rolls so uh
they were like we all went to dinner afterwards and i'm just a fly on the wall at this dinner
but there was a a vibe of who's getting cut who we we bring it in. There was another player from a different team that went
to dinner with us.
They were kind of courting.
You have to be
wondering, well, shit,
I haven't been talking to those three about who we're
getting rid of, so it's
probably me.
It was a really neat thing
to attend. That was interesting.
I don't know if you remember it like I do, but that happened.
Yeah, I mean, that happens.
That used to happen a lot.
And that's the way that things were done back then when it was still a little bit of a Wild Wild West scenario.
But now that it's gotten to the level that it's at, there's so many rules that are both fair to the player and the organization, almost equally.
and the organization almost equally.
And I say almost because obviously players end up winning the majority of the thing because they're the ones that will not play or bench themselves
or pretty much be a pain in the ass to the organization.
And luckily I've never had to deal with any of my players being that,
largely because not only do I take care of them,
but I speak to them like humans and I tell them,
in my old day, this is how we used to do things yeah it's like a
handshake means a lot and this that and the other so i've been very very lucky man yeah but it and
you know when you're a pro gamer being on optic or even like having your team want you isn't just
a financial thing although it is it's also your sense of self-worth.
You know,
when your teammates all get together and decide you need to get demoted,
that's a rough time,
you know,
and it kicks your confidence,
which kicks your game,
which it hurts a lot.
And,
but it's the reality of it.
You can't just keep a guy on.
So you never heard his feelings and lose.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You know, more often, like nowadays, more than ever more than ever, it's become a little bit more professional
to where players are looking more for a better pace, better salary so they can do that.
And they have to because that's what the market's demanding.
Where in the past, you'd be like, all right, we're going to give you this, but you are
an optic, so if you stream, you're going to get X amount of money.
If you make YouTube videos, you're going to get.
So at one point, I felt as though I'm like, why would I pay a player $1,500 a month to come make $5,000 a month?
And in total, it's $6,500 a month.
So we would work out some – and it changed, obviously, as the years went on.
But those are my thoughts at the beginning of it.
I'm like, why?
I'm like, I don't understand.
I'm giving you a life-changing opportunity where if you use this platform correctly,
you won't need any team to pay you anything.
You can just go off on your own and do whatever you want.
Back in the day, Parasite joined your team for like a month.
Does that sound right?
No, it was like three days.
Okay, three days. three days and i'm gonna
make up numbers but his twitter following went from like 40 grand to 120 grand on those three
days and uh he didn't mesh with the team so he didn't stick around but it was like dude he just
elevated his position amongst the fans like in terms of visibility by a ton yeah yeah i mean i
don't know if those were accurate numbers probably but it was but they were significant significant enough for that to
happen like maybe two more times during that time period that's when seth uh seth left to envy for
a couple for a couple of us they called it the optic juice at the time you know it's it's so i
mean we said it's still it's still a thing you know with it with the call of duty specifically
that that you know that you know you're you get the viewership that you don't often get anywhere else because of the hard work and our deliberate plan to be different than everybody else out there, to build an audience before a championship team, to sacrifice countless hours of both practice and content creation to build an audience.
So a lot of credit goes to the originals that came before the current state that we're in right now because they did.
We built a really cool model, man, and it sucks that not a lot of organizations put it into effect
because we'd have – in Call of Duty specifically,
you know,
my dream was always to,
to,
to help make Call of Duty become like one of the top three e-sports in the
world.
And,
and if,
if other organizations were as committed to building the way that we build,
I mean,
and face,
look at face,
man,
they fucking blew up,
man.
And it elevated us.
And,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and,
and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, elevated us and and and you know if other people if we could have like three
more uh teams do what phase did we could have had like major major major control uh of audiences
across all of esports and and people would you know that you know it was the game too like i
don't know people would say cod wasn't competitive and uh it took me a long time to
understand what that meant you know and to me this is what it means like let's say i'm playing you
and you're much better than me at cod right if i 1v1 you it might go 15 to 5 right because
you know sometimes it just goes down that way whereas if i were to play a different game where
you're much better than me like mortal combat it would be 15 to 0 right you like you're the
better player would just win all the time yeah skill ceiling say that again the skill ceiling
is different you know when you there are some games that when you're great at them
no one can touch you you know the the skill gap is is much more well defined i understand
skill ceiling but there's also an element of randomness in there right like i don't know the
worst player can win sometimes in cod and uh you know a lot of times with a competitive rule set
though that it takes a lot of that bullshit away yeah and and the fact and the fact that like uh
you know the ponder hearts of the world are always looking at every single number with diligence to make sure that it is competitive, that has helped a lot through the years.
Call of Duty has never been as competitive as right now because there are so many superstars in every single team that can beat the shit out of you at any given point.
Any given Sunday is the term, And it's never been truer
in Call of Duty than it is right now.
So it's good, man.
We're entering into the golden
age of Call of Duty
for the next couple of years, for sure.
Yeah, I think
on the back of the current
game, I think that it's going to bring
a lot of people back to Call of Duty. I think it has.
And I think a lot of people are going to
discover COD for the first time as a
really great first-person shooter.
It's so good right now.
I don't know
how they were able to make such a good Battle Royale
so fast, because you see what's going on with
Battlefield. They're not going to put out their Battle
Royale until March or something.
That's how far behind they are.
They did a really good job
to get that thing out in a timely fashion
on release day and have it quite
well polished. They came out with an update
the other day that addressed a lot of the issues
that a few of us had.
I'm sure it's going to continue to improve.
Treyarch is so good. If I list my top
five CODs, it's like a bunch
of Treyarch games in COD 4.
Yeah, same. Well, COD 4 and COD 2. Oh, COD 2, it's like a bunch of Treyarch games in COD 4. Yeah, same.
Well, COD 4 and COD 2, but that's
obviously... Oh, COD 2, I'm sorry.
Yeah, COD 2. That's just more
I don't know, me
reminiscent, but Call of Duty 4 is still
one of my favorite games of all time.
All the prestigious are right here.
I have a whole bunch of cool shit back
there. But yeah, for me,
it's a game changing,
life changing sort of game that I was so passionate about it that it helped me,
you know,
sort of think of things differently that allowed me to do what I did.
You know,
from a content creation standpoint,
from a,
I don't know,
from a,
from a,
from a cultural cool standpoint,
like what,
what sort of storylines do we want to build around ourselves that,
you know,
makes people more interested than, than just because we're we're players and that's you
know that's that's what us commentators helped build essentially right when we started sharing
our our livelihoods over a video game that's when we started developing those those sort of
friendships with friends we've never met and we'll probably never meet, you know,
which is your audience that are vested in your success because they know who you are.
They know that you have, you know, a wife.
They know that you have a kid.
They know the name of your dog.
They, like, know all this stuff that almost makes them, you know, vested in your success.
I mean, that was the nature effect, right?
The first of its kind, in my opinion, where, you know, he was in front of the camera so much and and opened up so much that
people were like man not only do i know a a kid like him you know the sort of you know goofy funny
but you know really you know really good at the game but i can relate to the fact that you know
he worked at mcdonald's as a kid or i can relate to the fact that you know he's learning how to
shave for the first time and this is the first time he's shaving i've gone through sick and all of this sort of exposure and and and sharing of of him of him
being that you know himself made people be like you know what i want this kid to succeed because
i i know so much about him i know more about him than i do someone better than him you know so i
think that helped a lot and that all came from early 2009, 2010 YouTubers like us.
You're welcome, everybody.
I talked about the little lives that my channel has touched.
When I first knew of Nadeshot, I did two things that kind of pumped him up a little bit.
Because no one knew him at all.
He was still working at McDonald's at this time.
And one was we were going to do this thing with the billionaire challenge where we like the pro teams together we had a million dollar fake budget and i paid 900 000 for nade
shot more than any other player in the whole thing and he got known and then it got shut down
uh because like he was gonna it was like a suicide prank where he was gonna like fund the live
streaming of a guy who had terminally ill,
but it was never true.
He woke up from the dead and sang the Monster Mash,
but people got really sensitive
about it, and it got canceled.
So what I did, they were going to
do this free-for-all
tournament, and I talked to
I forget the guy's name. Do you guys remember
the Billionaires Bash guy's name?
I'm trying to think
Kelby oh Alki David yeah yeah so I talked to Alki David and I was like
you've got to get late Nate shot in this thing like you it was not you win $5,000
if you if you win it and he said no and I'm like no no you've got to do it you
don't understand Nate shots the man I felt an obligation to sort of support
the guys that I had put on my team because they lost the opportunity to win money partly because i pulled out so i was
trying to take care of the people that yeah they'll hurt by pulling out i guess so i got nade shot in
it and he won the five thousand dollars and i'm pretty sure that five thousand dollars is when he
lost mcdonald's and uh nade shot obviously earned his own success but yeah that was a little part
of it at the start yeah he quit he quit mcdonald's fully when he won the first ever million dollar
tournament uh at call of duty xp which is this one call of duty xp uh but yeah no i did abroad
it did it did help him get on the map because it was exposure to to your audience exposure to other
youtubers audience that were involved in this um but yeah alky david was uh was the person that did oh man we went through some
dirty patches early on holy shit i just remember like oh my god we did didn't we i mean we literally
got down and dirty with our hands and built a platform you know one of the things that that all like
just recently i i posted a a clip from my for my uh podcast where i say you know hard work
determination 24 7 like ethic is what gets in some kids like well it's easy for you to say you know
it's really easy for you to i'm like it's never been easier i I guess it levels out. But when we started, think about where the gaming community was on YouTube.
Think about what having 50,000 subscribers meant back then.
And YouTube actively, I don't want to say attacked, but unsupported gaming channels.
They would bury it.
There was no gaming category on the homepage.
You couldn't get there unless you miscategorized which fans would have hated me
doing um they youtube wasn't on your side the first year i made videos there was no local
monetization like it was just for passion uh it was yeah and people say it's harder now and it's
harder in different ways but yeah that's that's that's where that's the point that i was getting
at i replied to him i'm like i'm like dude i made videos for free for two years and had to help build this community in
youtube you know how do we bring eyeballs to a place that's being invented think about generate
generating an audience on any platform that doesn't have that like imagine like you couldn't
even migrate people from twitch or from YouTube to another one right now.
We were literally building something that will benefit everybody for the rest of their lives.
What we did very, very early on as pioneers and as builders, we literally built a platform for people to be able to do this and i'm not saying that all credit goes to us because obviously machinima had a big part of that and and a
million other creators did well more like a hundred other creators did but it uh i i am i am gonna go
some time in the future and on my deathbed i'm to be like, the whole gaming thing that is so popular, I had a big part in that.
And that is going to be...
You changed my life, right?
What you did by moving it from the cinema being the center of the universe where you just hoped that they uploaded your videos to everyone being able to upload on their own channel, it changed my life in a big way.
Yeah. But it wasn't even like... At the time it was just like you know let's band together everybody let's
band together and we're gonna we're gonna win and we did man it's it would have been really easy for
you to be like no i'm good man i don't want to fuck up with the shit that i have going on right
now everybody did their part you know what i'm saying so it's uh it was good you're not giving
yourself credit you led that so hard i found out about that afterwards like you know it and once you got it it was like oh this is a thing that
can be had you know yeah we did people just didn't recognize their own strength yeah it was it was a
good times way back in the day man i i i reminisce about it every so often uh but i but i do appreciate
like where where it's at.
I'm proud of the work we built here.
Not only here in Optic,
but our part in esports,
our part in entertainment on YouTube,
gaming, and all that, man.
It's been a really, really cool ride
for me, personally.
I don't know, man.
I'm in my own fucking studio.
It's like fucking 3,500 square feet of just me.
You know? Let me see if I can show you.
Matt, I'm going to lift
because I built this place to
everything's modular, so if I
don't want to stream having this in the background,
lift this really quickly.
I'm going to pivot
the cord.
Just make sure it doesn't hit the...
So I can...
Watch the power cords over there. Am I good?
Yeah.
Look at that.
Yeah, so it goes...
That's like an Ikea. That's a huge amount of space.
I don't know.
You guys can't see...
I'm sorry. My room is so big, you can't see
what I'm pointing at.
Yeah, so Scumpy's
over there.
And I built this place because I wanted the content creators in Optic to have a place to come and just stream and do whatever the fuck they wanted.
Competitors, like I have a LAN center over here where you can move the tables to wherever you want to face anything, man.
I was watching Scumpy stream. It was either last night or the night before.
He was doing a – it seemed like some sort of pro level game battles he was competing and i was like where
the freak is he like what why is he in a a strip mall right now now i understand now i see where
he was behind scumpy when he streams is just a vast sea of empty space. Yeah. And I want to say, does he have a good chair?
Did he have a crappy chair?
No, no crappy chair.
No, all right, I'm wrong about that then.
But yeah, I was watching.
Yeah, it's...
Hold on.
I have to perfect this whole moving the things.
But, you know, it's pretty cool.
What is that for? Is just the vip lounge or oh that's just a lot you know a hangout lounge uh it i feel like i'm 70 done with the with the
with the place so these are all our trophies that were that i just got out of storage i have to put
in a an entertainment center right under the tv and then i'm gonna put them all on top of that but
but yeah man like i i'm having a really good time looking for a magic the gathering division in an entertainment center right under the TV and then I'm going to put them all on top of that. But yeah, man,
I'm having a really good time.
If you're looking for a Magic the Gathering division,
hit me and Kyle up. We won't do
well, but we will spend a lot of time
in that warehouse.
Win-win for me.
But yeah, that's what
I've been up to. I guess I'll just leave it here now.
Yeah, it's awesome, man. It's really cool.
It's so cool.
Seeing all this now, it really comes full circle when we were asking you about working and you're like you know I don't even feel like I'm working it just feels like a big project it's
like it well now I see why like this looks like a fucking blast yeah so this all these tables
these are these are Ikea dining room tables uh these are like 350 bucks and then i put
eight dollar wheels on them to be able to just move and this is part of my uh my conference room
which is in this very place this is the setup that nature is going to be streaming out of all next
week but i'm going to move this more to here it's like a big project, man. I love being in here.
I've been able to just come up with
dope shit nonstop that is just
my
sanctuary almost, a place to go.
God damn it.
Yeah, that's sick.
If you guys are ever in Texas, we'll do an eavesdrop podcast.
Not live, but here in the
studio. Yeah, that'd be cool.
That'd be sick. Yeah, definitely. I know you've got to probably dip out in the next couple minutes, but thanks in the studio. Yeah, that'd be cool. That would be sick.
Yeah, definitely.
I know you've got to probably dip out in the next couple minutes,
but thanks for coming on, man.
I appreciate the invite, man.
Last time I was on, it was probably like two years.
I can't believe.
How many episodes is that?
411.
How many times a week?
Well, okay, so this PKA is 411.
We do a private podcast for patrons, and that's at like 210 or something like that just explain that the private uh well so it's how long is it it's an hour and
for free it's audio only and for video it's a patreon level it's either five or ten dollars
a month i think it's 10 is it 10. So it's about $2 for that show.
You get this one early, too.
So you could call it about a dollar a show.
And yeah, so if you combine those, we're at $620.
$5, man.
The consistency, like, yeah, there's $5.
Don't give it to them for free now.
A dollar?
You better charge it up.
They're getting a steal, bro.
I mean, think about the consistency
that's one of the things that you have like it's monetizing this it wasn't really monetized for
the first couple hundred episodes and we would miss episodes you know because it wasn't it
you know i don't know we don't have much responsibility to it we're not getting paid
we haven't missed an episode in years well Well, Wings has missed a few episodes here lately,
like a couple hundred, something like that.
I don't know.
He doesn't show up.
Fair counterpoint.
I wish he was gone.
He said to come in for one episode,
and almost five years later,
I'm still coming back every week.
We don't want Taylor here.
He just keeps showing up.
It's about consistency.
I don't even get paid.
I haven't heard of Wings in like a year, year and a half.
You haven't?
Oh, my God.
Wings is famous.
Wings has done so many things since you've been gone.
All right?
So for the last year, he's been getting trolled so hard that he spawned like a dozen troll channels.
An industry.
that he spawned like a dozen troll channels.
An industry.
There are YouTube channels with like tens and tens of thousands of subscribers
that sometimes get half a million views
on videos that are just taking his Twitch streams
and making troll content out of them.
There are music videos that are well produced
singing about wings.
We should watch Mr. Big Guy right now.
It's so fucking good.
It's music though. I feel like it's going to get copyright claimed. I mean... I'll watch it after. right now it's so fucking good it's music though i feel like it's gonna get
copyright claim i i mean i'll watch it after what's it called i'll link you mr big guy it's so
good but i i know he did he got a he got a one of those weight he went to mexico and got weight
loss surgery that his stomach now like his stomach stomach on the inside is four ounces he's lost
we don't know how much he's lost but i would say 100 pounds maybe maybe maybe 75 to 100 pounds a lot um he looks different he looks different um
you know he's but but he's never been more unhappy yeah he's just so it kind of laid it out there
there's an industry trolling wings right now and it's interesting because wings will stream and get a couple hundred people but he is way more famous than his personal numbers reflect they're yeah
the people who upload content about wings and nothing else by the way it's not like these are
troll channels doing a little bit of wings and a little bit of pewdiepie or no these are wings
channels that's all they do they go to his stream, find highlights every time he dies in a game or something.
They put it all together.
Some of them are hard.
Wings has a Twitch where I guess he sniffs his hand or he rubs his nose like that.
There'll be like a four-minute, eight-minute compilation of him rubbing his nose.
The one where he creaked his chair.
His chair, it underwent
a lot of stress and now when he moves
it makes more noise than other chairs
do. There's like an 11
minute chair creaking
compilation. And
it blows my mind.
So Wings is in some
ways just exploding. And oh
you might not know this. He put
out there that he wanted to get the
weight loss surgery and people started donating to him to assist him in that weight loss surgery
i think his goal was 30 000 which he way surpassed and then he because i think because he was a
little scared of getting the surgery done he's not a guy who's left hometown very much yeah and he
was going to go to Mexico and get a surgery.
So that's way outside a lot of comfort zones,
but outrageous for Wings himself.
And he told some lies, to be fair, about the progress on it.
You know, like, he'd be like, I don't have a date yet,
but I got my plane tickets, so that's moving along well.
No, you don't.
Oh, yeah, you could just change the date on plane tickets.
It's no big deal.
Yes, it is.
So the trolls just spawned and grew,
and Wings is now, I want to say, as famous as he's ever been.
When I go into COD lobbies in Blackout,
my friends will frequently do this.
They'll just type into the all chat so that all 100 players can see it.
They'll be like, any Wings of Redemption fans? And they'll just
spit back quotes and stuff
in the chat. Every single
lobby, they know Wings of Redemption.
They know who he is.
They'll be like, look here,
look, listen. They'll say stuff like that,
which is one of his famous quotes.
He's freaked out. He's like, look here, look, listen.
He grabs the mic and screams at it.
Appearing offline doesn't stop it. We know the quote.
Stop talking about things you know nothing about.
Yeah.
Oh, man. Ban anyone who talks about things
they don't think about.
I'm looking at one.
WeStreetDemons gets stream sniped and loses it.
$886,000.
What?
MrBigGuy video I linked is 886,000 views. What? Mr. Big Guy video I linked is 150,000,
and it's the best content that's been produced ever.
Let's roll the dice.
Let's play it.
No, I'll watch it over here.
Have you seen how Mr. Medeker is?
Yeah, I was about to link Mr. Medeker
and show him that too.
Not to watch, but just to see the views on it.
Yeah, he made like a full-length documentary.
Do you know Mr. Medeker?
No.
He does exposés on people.
Oh my god, I'm going to stop this because it's fucking funny.
Were you watching Mr. Big Guy for a second?
Yeah, it got to the point to where some dude's like...
Hex, look at the views on the one that's got the call of duty
like icon on it that video that i just linked look look at the views on that in their internet
oh my god momentum in 756 000 views from just a few months ago it hit half a million in like a
like a couple weeks oh so when he comes back
and gets back into the swing of things...
I don't know.
He wants $3,000 to come on the show.
How much?
$10,000 per episode.
He said if we paid him $10,000,
he would come on PK again.
Dude, I know you guys aren't going to like it,
but I think it'd be worth it, man.
The cartoons, the animation,
they were all...
Anyway.
Listen, thank you for having
me on. I'm going to go home and spend some time with the
fam before they go to bed.
It was good catching up, man.
If you guys are ever again in Texas, hit me up.
We'll do the Eves drop.
Or...
I don't know, maybe.
Maybe we'll do it like this in this format, which would be easier for everyone.
But anyway, I do appreciate it.
Pimp your stuff.
Tell us where you can find us.
Tell us about your social media, your podcast, everything optic that you'd like our listeners to know about.
Lay it out.
So, yeah, so if you guys like podcasts like this one, not as good or as consistent, it's just as brand new.
It's the eavesdrop
podcast is syndicated to every single audio platform uh it's fun on on youtube and uh we
haven't done any live live events yet but but it's something so so far uh you know honorable
mentions we have whiz from the head of gaming at google nate shaskumpy uh courage uh you know
hastro and david von der hart so far and a couple of cool guests in
the upcoming show so yeah please please check it out yeah on youtube uh hex is uh you can just find
me as hex h3cc or hecc i appreciate it i thank you so much thanks for coming on thank you boys
i'll uh when does this go live when can i watch it saturday you're what i miss
noon something like that okay but okay so i have to be a patreon to see it or no that's when it
goes live for everybody okay perfect all right yes yeah patreons will get it tonight yeah yeah
awesome thank you boys be good okay yep later man take care bye-bye all right let me do a couple of
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yeah smart moves build your website with squarespace and make sure that you're taking
care of yourself financially don't wait until uh until you're in your late 20s or something to do that. You won't like it.
I was meaning like aggregating all those payments and taking more responsibility.
It's a better thing to do right now.
I enjoyed Hex.
I'm glad we had him on.
Yeah, stroll down memory lane.
And if you guys are only doing the audio version,
you really should watch the video version of this
so you could see Hex's badass setup there
and all that stuff that he was talking about behind him.
It was very cool.
Yeah, it was really cool.
So fitness.
Dude.
Now, I am still stuck
because I can't get my device to work.
Tell me about your customer support experience.
Are you talking to humans?
Are they getting back to you?
Are they, like...
What's happening on their side?
I sent them the support kind of email
and then got back the boilerplate.
It's been added to the list of things
that they're working to handle.
And Chiz was like,
just use your Twitter.
That'll get them way, way faster.
And so I used my Twitter
and complained about what was going on
and they got to me pretty quick in DMs.
But they were like, oh, okay, someone's definitely going to be helping you tomorrow.
And then tomorrow, which was yesterday, came and went.
The person that got to you on Twitter maybe works in marketing and not support or something.
Yeah, yeah.
They even told me, oh, send it to this email.
And I'm like, yeah, I did send it to that email.
It's not going to work fast enough.
I explained the podcast situation and even told them, so this is. And I'm like, yeah, I did send it to that email. It's not going to work fast enough. Like I explained the podcast situation and even told them like, so this is the issue I'm
having. It's recording my heart rate and it's sending it to my phone. But then when I try and
go to the part, which is quote my stats, which is the area where you'd see me, Woody, Kyle, and
Chiz is kind of in that for, uh, just showing all of our activity. It doesn't go to that. It says
that I haven't done the activity, even when it's, it says processed in another part of the app and so i don't know what it is i think they're
gonna have to handle it from their end but i don't know i i wish it would have been a little faster
because i was like ready i was amped up ready to go like excited to get this going so i was
disappointing yeah have you tried making a new account well it's already registered with the
account that i used to make it there like when i when i bought it i pre-registered i didn't receive it and then register yeah see
that was something i didn't understand about so you pre-registered as did woody chis and i did
not pre-register it um and so woody what were you given a facility code when you pre-ordered it
did you ever have to involve a facility code with your setup? No. So when you buy it, you can either create an account, which involves a facility code,
or you can just log in.
So when I bought mine, I logged in and it came pre-programmed with that facility code.
If you look at it on my account, it says my zone.
Okay.
So we've gotten to a bit of the issue then because Chiz and I, we did not pre-register.
We just like closed that box.
And so when it came, we had to register it.
And that involved me contacting them and getting the
facility code. I believe if you're an independent person
not working through a MyZone gym, the code is generic.
It's region-based, or more specifically, it's nation-based.
They gave me the code for the United States of America, which I won't give it out.
It's just like MZUS001.
You know, it's very generic. Taylor didn't have that same experience, it seems. It seems that his
did not come to him pre-registered or coded because he did need that facility code. And I
shared with him my facility code. So I think therein lies a bit of the issue that occurred.
Like, I feel like they
should be able to hop in on their end and get this straightened out pretty quick like they must be
dealing with a lot of issues with these devices so i pre-registered and mine came pre-programmed
it sounds like you pre-registered and yours came poorly programmed or something like that like it
just it didn't didn't sync up like it was supposed to yeah i just don't get why because it's not like
the whole thing is busted or something.
It records my data correctly.
It just doesn't send it to where it's supposed to.
So we'll get it figured out, because I'm really looking forward to this.
As far as punishments go, where are you guys leaning?
So I love the idea that winner chooses the vacation.
Hmm. I like that one. the vacation. Hmm.
I like that one.
That's the winner one, though.
That could be fun.
But that's also a punishment for the losers because they've got to finance it.
I agree.
Yeah.
Oh, you know what?
Maybe we should put a budget on that because I don't want, like...
Honestly, I'm already not psyched that I'm probably going to be out half a grand when I lose on this.
I don't want to be bankrolling someone's vacation, so I'm not going to do that. It's funny to me out half a grand when I lose on this. I don't want to be bankrolling someone's
vacation, so I'm not going to bet.
It's funny to me, too, because you're probably going to win.
Even if I win,
I'm paying my way through our trip.
I don't want it to be a money
thing. Okay, okay. I'm with
you on that, and I think I agree.
Maybe we just go do something like that
anyway at some point, and we all just cover our own
ends or something like that.
So maybe that's not a good idea to punish whoever's already coming out with $500
to pay for belts and championship belts and stuff like that.
Maybe we don't lay another $1,500, $2,000 or whatever.
It could get crazy.
So I like ideas that involve us on this show doing something painful,
humiliating, or silly.
Things that create content for the show.
So it kind of comes full circle, and there's a bit of a feedback loop of good content.
I have an idea about that, where the loser, the fourth place person,
has to write an official, real, not ad-libbed, a real speech.
Not sarcastic in any way. It must be a speech
lauding, praising,
heaping, heaping
adulation onto the winner
in a way where you're constantly having to
say to yourself, and I myself as a weaker man
was not capable of doing,
but it has to be, and you can't sneak
jokes in. You can't sneak jokes in to
try and dig at him. You have to write an adulating
speech and be very humble giving it. So who does this to who? Fourth, does it to first? sneak jokes in. You can't sneak jokes in to try and dig at them. You have to write an adulating speech
and be very humble giving it.
So who does this to who? Fourth does it to first?
The fourth place player has to really
blow the first place person.
Can I jump in and say
let's make that the third place person
has to do that for first place.
Because I think fourth place should be
because I think
fourth place should be a little worse.
I like the idea of something like that one chip challenge
where you have to either gross or painful and something you eat.
So one idea would be eating bugs, right?
You can buy those packages of like crickets and grasshoppers and shit like that,
eating a whole package of those.
What is one chip?
One chip is this, it's like a single package.
I believe it's like a chip that's like super spicy it's it's covered in some kind of crazy
extra large painfully spicy dorito yeah okay that's all right well i i don't like that at all
and so it's probably a good idea right i would hate that like like i was i was sitting here last
night i made myself like a burrito bowl type thing.
I put a bunch of sriracha on it.
I was crying just from sriracha.
That chip...
This is a scary looking package.
Packy tortilla chips.
It looks like a casket.
This is good.
I like this idea for fourth place.
I like it too.
What I don't want to do is bring shame to my family.
I don't want fourth place
to have to
slide over three feet and see how fast
they could jerk off and show the semen as proof.
Look.
No one wants you to do that.
Well, we all did that before the show.
We kept telling Woody you didn't have to. Well, we all did that before the show. We kept telling Woody
you didn't have to.
Woody, the competition hasn't started yet.
So I was just, you know,
I don't want to
bring shame to my family.
But I'll eat a spicy chip.
Yeah, I'm with you there.
We'll do it towards the end of the show
with maybe like 20 minutes remaining
so it doesn't actually fuck with the talking part. But that'd be funny to do it towards the end of the show with maybe like 20 minutes remaining so it doesn't actually fuck with the talking part.
But that would be funny to do it towards the end.
Yeah.
Vote on these ones we're coming up with right now in the comments or on the subreddit.
I really think that the speech idea has potential to be funny.
I think the speech idea is great.
I like the SAT, ACT idea.
I think that's fun.
We couldn't film it though.
That's like the big thing that was at that.
I think you film up to it, and then immediately afterwards,
your feelings, your level of confidence.
I don't know.
There's something no bullshit about that that's a little revealing.
I'm not sure I match high school Woody's SATs.
No way. I haven't done algebra in school Woody's SATs. No way.
I haven't done algebra in a long time.
Yeah.
No.
See, that one wouldn't work because none of us would take it seriously.
I guarantee five seconds in, I'd be like, this is silly and dumb.
I'm not going to actually take it that seriously.
So you're going to post your 300 and be like, here it is.
I didn't try.
It's just not that funny, I don't think.
I like the content idea.
It's the number one thing the fans want.
Or the thing of having to start your own web content for a while.
Like five episodes of a solo podcast,
or five episodes of you playing COD,
or Magic, or whatever the case might be.
I think that one is going to be good.
People want more content. Yeah, I think that one is going to be good. People want more content.
Yeah, I think that'd be good too.
I think they'd be pretty excited about it.
And like I said, I think you can upload it anywhere.
Because I know Kyle
might not want to put
a driving vlog on FPS Russia.
That might damage the brand.
But he could put it on
KLM4Numbers, I forgot.
Yeah, I've got that channel that's just FPS. I could put it on KLM4Numbers, I forgot. Yeah, I've got that
channel that's just FPS. I could put it there
if I could figure out what the password is to it.
You can put it on my channel.
Once I remember the password to that.
Exactly, right?
We could do something like that. Honestly,
I don't feel like that's a punishment, though.
That's my issue with that. I get that
the fans might enjoy that,
and maybe that's just something we should do.
I'd be down to do some gaming content.
Maybe we just start a brand new channel
and just put the content there or something like that.
I'd love that.
How about the loser has to get all the balls rolling
on a PKA Play's legit channel?
I mean, what balls are there to roll?
That's like an email.
All right, fair enough. That's really easy. Yeah, I would just be like, all right, I lost. I have to what balls are there to roll? That's like an email. Alright, fair enough. That's really easy.
Yeah, I would just be like,
alright, I lost. I have to get the ball rolling.
Chiz, so we're going to want the
branding to be nice. Get going on this.
You know, I'm going to delegate.
Chiz loses no matter what.
Yeah, exactly. Oh, wait, wait, wait. But about Chiz.
Like, at one point,
what episode is Chiz coming on the show? Because that
has to be a part of his competition. He has to come
on and be able to talk.
I feel like Chiz can fix his audio.
It is true. I talked to Chiz
just before the show, and I was thinking
to myself, is his audio really that bad?
Yeah, it was pretty shitty.
But you can fix that!
Chiz is an audio technician.
I don't know if you guys know this. He literally
would do audio tech, I think at MLG you guys know this. He literally would do like audio tech.
I think at MLG or something.
Like it's a thing that he's good at.
So he can solve this problem.
Well, of course he could.
Like if he could – rat.
Did he say that?
I mean worst case scenario, what?
He goes and gets an Airbnb in the area for $200 and he goes and stays somewhere and invites a nice lady over for the evening and he films from there.
He could make something happen.
He says he's going to come on
when the results
are revealed, which would be in a month
or so.
At the end of the competition, if you get fourth,
you have to take a shirtless picture and put it on
Twitter or Reddit or something like that.
That's awful embarrassing.
No, I don't want to take a shirtless picture.
Meanwhile, Taylor is like,
Oh, that's such bullshit.
I just processed that.
Taylor's like, you know, we should take
shirtless pictures.
Dude, there's a bunch
of trash around here.
It's not going to look good.
Get a pump before you do it.
Get a spray on tan.
Everybody's like, well, Taylor lost, and I want to You're going to look good. You're going to stand up and flex and get a pump before you do it. Get a spray on tan and get the lighting just right.
Everybody's like, well, Taylor lost, and I want to fuck him.
Taylor's punishment will show up on his Tinder profile.
That's horseshit.
Damn it, I thought I would sneak that one past the goalie.
Chiz, would you write down who you think will come in first through fourth and i'll circle back to it i want to know where chis's confidence level yeah i like the idea of eating that chip
that chip is awful i i think that anyone who who is like oh i don't care about that you should go
watch one of the videos of someone eating one of those chips and see just how horrific it is
it's it's very rough i mean like you like, you immediately, if it's, like, ghost peppers or anything like that,
like, your whole sinuses become inflamed.
Like, it hurts to breathe.
You're, like, suffocating because you've got mucus pouring out of your nose
and, like, so much spit in your mouth.
A little better than that, pepper spray yourself on the show.
I've got a can of Saber Red in the other room over there i'd happily
douse myself with it real good and uh and it is one of the worst experiences i've ever gone through
in my life although 15 minutes later you can continue your podcast there's just 50 there's
20 minutes of suffering while you wash your you wash your eyes i prefer the chip idea oh and by
the way i would do chis says it's gonna to go Chiz, Kyle, Woody, Taylor.
If there's one thing we know for sure, I'm in third.
I feel like that's consistent with it.
No matter who you ask, I'm nailing third.
I'm really going to go for third because I would a million times rather write a really over-the-top,
adulating speech about Kyle or Chiz than
I would rather eat that chip, because this chip
looks terrible. Absolutely.
Well, I like these ideas.
And I do a
tattoo as well. I wouldn't do a tattoo.
I will not do a tattoo.
I'm a parent.
I get this, yeah.
For all I know, me too.
So am I. Big deal. You think my kids care? They don't even know, me too. So am I.
Big deal.
You think my kids care?
They don't even know where I am.
This isn't for the show.
This is a disguise.
Yeah, no, I try not to break the rules.
No, you're looking for a Kyle Myers with no beard.
Oh, here's the thing I wanted to share with people.
These are the belt logos.
Yeah, man.
So just in case you're not in the know,
part of the winner's purse, if you will,
is a championship belt.
Another idea that I stole.
And it will feature some PKA relevant emblems
all around it, you know?
So Chiz's buddy made these for us.
The taco is mine.
It's meant to represent my two favorite things
in the world, pussy and food,
all in one package.
Excellent job with that.
It's a little meatier than I prefer, just saying.
All right?
But I think he did an excellent job there,
and that would look really nice engraved
in gold around my waist. so i i i need to
i need to fix the images people can't see anyone but me but kyle is the taco taylor is this amazing
owl with like hammers forming an x behind it with a little nod to saint louis uh chiz is a coffee
cup dr coffee md and i am this paragliding wing with clouds and a propeller and a compass thing.
I saw this, and I immediately wanted to know who did it.
I was so impressed with it.
Yours is excellent.
I feel like you probably want that as an actual family crest.
Right?
I want to do something with this.
I'm like, should I change my channel?
How about a tattoo of it?
That's just a great idea.
With hammers behind it.
Well, when I was in my 20s,
I was on a podcast
and a loft.
What was it called, Grandpa?
Don't worry about it.
Ever since the great YouTube scrub of 42.
Grandpa Taylor did a podcast
in the early 2000s
where he said a lot of things that would get him
put in prison now
in our luxury gay
space communism.
Oh, shit. Oh, man. You know, I saw something really interesting today that like i'd never seen before i was
getting gas at a gas station where i'd get most of my gas and i was filling up i had to process
that sorry so you get your gas at what kind of store i don't know why i included the detail
it's getting gas there was uh this woman with down syndrome in front of me with putting gas in a car.
And I was like, huh, that's really nice of whoever's driving to let her feel part of the gang, getting this going.
I bet she's in there buying a soda or whatever, or he or whoever this person's guardian is.
And so I was like, all right.
And I walk in to get myself my Diet Pepsi.
And I'm like, oh, nobody in here.
That's weird.
And so I got my Pepsi, and I walked back out,
and I pull my gas thing out.
And I see her.
She'd already taken hers out.
She's a couple steps ahead of me.
And I was like, what is she doing?
And then she got in the front of the car and drove away.
And I was like, is this allowed yeah retarded
people allowed to drive i was like this this can't possibly be cool like what i i mean she didn't get
an accident from what i could tell but immediately it is like let me look inside and what really?
It's like interesting.
I had no idea they were allowed to drive.
They totally are.
They have to pass the same driver's test written and driven like anyone else. And if they pass it,
they get a license.
And the other thing about down syndrome that isn't widely known is you can't
look at them and see how severe their down syndrome is.
There's a medium and I think it's called mosaic down syndrome,
where some people look like they have down syndrome, but they barely have it.
And then the opposite is true, too, where some people look pretty much like everybody else.
They don't have that characteristic down syndrome vibe about them,
but they actually have down syndrome.
Yeah, who's that comedian who did the
bit where he's like uh there's nothing worse than going up to ask what looks like a normal dude
direction and then you're like hey do you know how to get to i hop from here he turns around he's
like oh do you want to do it and then you're like ah what are you doing walking around looking
normal get out of here like that's so mean i don't like that oh it's a bad case remember who
that comedian i go but yeah i had no idea that people with down syndrome could drive i knew
it was i'd never heard that term mosaic but i knew that there were like there was a spectrum of it
but i didn't know that any spectrum part was like so not impaired that you could that you're allowed
to drive just a touch of the downs just a little bit yeah yeah i'm trying to think like i've seen
um there was a guy who did a TV show.
He was an actor and it centered around
him. I think he was the star of his own TV show.
He had Down Syndrome.
I thought Kyle would know the actor's name immediately because
sometimes he does.
That guy must have been memorizing lines
and running a show and doing stuff that's a lot tougher
than driving.
Running a show is maybe
not the thing.
The show was called Downtown.
Was it?
Was it really?
No, it wasn't.
All right, I'm too gullible.
I've got my own disabilities.
23's Company.
You guys are bad.
Well, I looked up Down Syndrome TV show
and the first thing it says is it's about keeping up with the Kardashians.
That's funny.
It's called Life Goes On, I think.
And the guy's name was Corky, and the actor's name was Chris Burke.
But, yeah, that guy, like, I don't know.
He was the star of the show.
He had a lot of lines.
So, mosaic.
Yeah, there was a movie that specifically had like
oh the ringer when johnny knoxville basically pretends like he's retarded to win the special
olympics and he ends up befriending all of his all of these people who are on the retarded and
like they're played by actors who are clearly retarded but but they're fine and i feel like
they're what you described what do they just got a touch of the downs and they're you know they're played by actors who are clearly retarded, but they're fine. I feel like they're what you described, Woody.
They just got a touch of the downs.
And they know their lines.
They're funny.
Their timing is good.
It's, yeah.
I think it's one of the guys in that movie
has actual down syndrome,
and he has the look that he looks like
he'd be severely impaired,
but it was what he described that he clearly doesn't.
Because he's in some old,
that same dude is in some old
Jackass and Wild Boys clips, where they, in the like jackass 2.5 or whatever where like
they do stuff with him there and he's clearly like impaired but he's like cracking jokes like with it
with them yeah you might not want to be a crane operator but he can he can he can come up with a
good joke and he can act you Plenty of people fall within that.
Wings was a crane operator.
Wings has been... Yeah, right?
Confirmed.
Confirmed.
Please, come on.
I'm just telling you what Wings says.
Okay, well, I didn't know.
There should be a whole channel called Wings Says.
And now there is.
Like recently, I've owned three motorcycles in my life flipped them all
just just drop that out there laid that little thing out there what did i used to do for a living
i was a crane operator slash metallurgist just dropped it dropped that out well maybe by crane
he's not talking about the thing that we're thinking of where you sit inside like a vehicle
almost yeah operate a tower.
Maybe the crane is more like, what do you call it when there's like the chains that lift things on rails?
Is it a gurney system?
I know what you're talking about.
I don't know what it's called, but it's like inside of plants and factories, they're used to like move heavy things around and they're sort of on a track.
I'm sure he's talking about that, but I just don't know if they allowed him to operate it but like like when he describes his job what i've heard the
most is when he's like knocking slag off of the melting pots or whatever which involves taking
like a big metal shovel and hitting a thing with it and that sounds to me more like a wings job
he was uh he used to brag about how he ratted on his co-workers a lot like if they didn't work
hard enough he'd go to management and tell him that that guy wasn't carrying his load and i i
don't know that always sat a little wrong with me it's something that young people do actually
they don't keep to themselves a little bit and try to like tell on each other yeah when you hit
30 at work like i don't know dude when i was 19 like working in that car
dealership like there was a bond between us like like like there was a hierarchy of people that
like will share i'll share everything with my friends i'll share almost everything with my
co-workers i'll share most stuff with my like managers and we don't say shit to like the
managers managers who work at corporate like like when they come down we all try to make
the people above us look good by doing what we're supposed to be doing you know like like nobody's
throwing anybody under the bus or anything like that like i think i can almost explain that right
like you worked in sales which is a batch of people with a high eq right iq is intelligence
eq is this emotional quote being able to relate to people car salesmen are that they get weeded
out if they're not good at that.
I worked with computer programmers.
These are the opposite end of the spectrum, right?
People who might be in the autism range or a lot of them from a foreign land of some sort.
And they just had different cultural norms.
Yeah, that's a double fucking fist right there when you're both, perhaps on the spectrum,
your mind is built to be good at that programming job. That's a double fucking fist right there when you're both perhaps on the spectrum.
Your mind is built to be good at that programming job.
And just because you have that aptitude, that's probably isolated you a bit from people already.
And you don't have the aptitude to counteract it either. And then on top of all of that, you're Indian in America, which is just the worst, which is just the worst.
We've talked about that before.
If we got to pick a race, I'd pick Jewish.
Like that's definitely – I think that's the best group of people to belong to is to be Jewish.
They have their own thing.
They're –
We don't need a wall.
We just need to hang a giant net between here and India, right?
Chiz doesn't want to talk about our favorite and least favorite races,
which is where we were heading.
I mean, I was interested to get the new...
You know, Kyle's rankings are like the AP Top 25.
Like, they're always morphing, changing.
He's taking things into account.
He's got a very sophisticated algorithm.
And so I'm always fascinated to learn who's moved up,
who's had a good week, what are the power rankings.
Like if Ireland has a great week.
Right.
They go up.
Suddenly Conor McGregor wins.
I don't think Switch is.
But America's always won, isn't it?
Or sometimes does America get knocked down?
Well, are we talking about our favorite countries
and where we win?
And America's not a race.
America's a melting pot.
Oh, okay.
Well, then fuck whatever I was saying.
Do you?
Do you? My Skype doesn't auto- was saying. Do you, do you.
My Skype doesn't auto-scroll.
Do you know the solution for that?
Maybe you have to, like, I don't know.
Mine doesn't either.
Especially because you're doing, like,
your OBS thing and recording and stuff.
Mine does auto-scroll.
Like, right now I am full screen in, like,
I don't know if it's called windowed mode or whatever it is.
The new Skype is annoying.
I've got a giant box of Woody.
Huge.
Taylor and I are on these two little boxes off to the side.
Then I've got the chat on the left side of my screen.
If you click on me, will it right-size me?
No, I've been trying to so hard.
Hey, words hurt, man.
It just makes it worse.
I just keep supersizing every time.
I double-tap to you, and you just got massive.
Is it okay if I rub my nipples?
Is that funny?
Oh, God, no.
I'm on screen.
That's the punishment.
For hours three to four,
you must be touching your nipples at all times on the show.
Don't explain it to guests.
And it has to be under the shirt.
That's an interesting thing to do.
Maybe there's a component where we don't
we have a guest on Punishment Week
and we don't tell them about an
embarrassing thing that we're doing the whole time.
Like maybe Taylor has
to stutter. The loser has to stutter.
And really
drag things out with a guest
who has no idea.
So Paul Paul and really drag things out with a guest who has no idea. You're like, so Paul?
Paul?
This is making me uncomfortable already.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
What?
Wondering.
The stutterer slaps himself.
Or you could just do Tourette's.
Tourette's might be great.
Like, you know
that the the the guy's talking telling his story you just like bullshit fucking bullshit
but every you have to a lot of hard r's have to be dropped you need to sell it
you gotta do that that's rough like in college you're stuttering, you're like, and you fucking idiot.
Fucking get it out.
Like that kind of thing.
That would make me more uncomfortable than pretty much anything else you said.
Do you guys have little things where weird random stuff will pull on your heartstrings
more than other stuff?
Like where I'll be like, oh, yeah, clearly it's sad when someone dies a terrible, terrible untimely death but then you'll see like a puppy it happened to and it's like man i know on a logical level
it's much sadder for a human but like the puppy gets to you more because it's innocent that's how
i am with people who have like speech impediments or stutter is i don't know what it is like i feel
so bad for them like it must suck to like be that self-conscious all the time because you know those
people are going out there like uh you know someone's going to be that self-conscious all the time, because you know those people are going out there like,
someone's going to be thinking about this
and doing this and that, and it's not their fault.
Most of these people try their damnedest
to get rid of these. I don't know. That really
makes me feel for people
is when they have a speech impediment or stutter.
The thing that makes me
really sad, I saw this
earlier. There's a family in a doctor's
office, and the two-year-old girl is hearing for the first time she got an implant or something like that and the
mother's holding her and the little girl starts reacting in this really adorable she's like oh
she's hearing and the mom's holding her and the mom's face just gets so red and she's just sobbing
with like you know happiness for the daughter and i i i like i was scrolling through reddit
looking for like topics and stuff uh like like an hour ago and i saw that and i i i like i was scrolling through reddit looking for like topics and stuff
uh like like an hour ago and i saw that and i i was it really hurt my feelings like i don't know
if that's not the right thing it it pulled at my heartstrings i was i was about to cry with her
yeah i saw a similar one or kyle mentioned but um it was a dude it was a grown-up and he had lost
his hearing as an adult and it was was a really tough time for him.
I think he had some other maladies that went with it.
And as he got his hearing back, he was gay.
He either proposed or was proposed to by his husband as the first words.
That's really cool.
Yeah, it was really powerfully done, the video.
It was pretty cool.
There's a lot of those sad montages on on youtube that like every once in a while like i
don't even know how i get there but it'll be like dogs like running at soldiers when they get back
home and shit or like a really young girl or boy like seeing their like dad show up at career day
forum and like i've watched those before and it's like a 20 minute video montage and i'm like at 12
minutes in like crying and i'm like why am i doing this like i'm so sad like i've done that
we've both gone down the um arm wrestler uh what do they call the hole the bunny hole anyway i
forgot but yeah we've both gone down the arm wrestling route of watching video after video
of guys with like strength deformities in their left arm. They just win like world championships.
It's pretty cool.
Yeah.
The one guy with the hand.
Yeah.
With the, with the arm,
the size of a normal person's quad.
Yeah.
That guy's insane.
Dude.
And the people he's competing against are also practically superhuman.
And when,
like when you dwarf me,
well,
you're amongst the 1% of the population that can do that.
When you dwarf people who dwarf me, now you're outrageous.
His arm is so big that you would think he was cosplaying as Hellboy from 15 feet away.
That's how big it is.
His hand is bigger than Hellboy's mitt.
I arm wrestled the shit out of Hellboy.
His hand's easily bigger than your head.
If he were to hold your face, it would be way bigger.
Other big men with big hands, he'll grab around their whole hand,
and it'll end down here, in the middle of their forearm.
It's insane.
It's crazy.
Those people have to be like, this is ridiculous.
That particular guy, he was a world champion with his right arm.
Then he got injured, so he just started being a world champion lefty.
Oh, that would be so insulting.
You only won because of your fucked up, goofy hand.
He's like, actually, you know, I'm pretty good with the other one.
It's like, yeah, well, I bet.
Both his arms are huge like that.
Yeah, it's crazy.
I don't know.
I was thinking of that other guy who's only got one big arm have you seen that he's like a pretty normal looking dude
but then he's got one enormous arm and hand that like hangs down like an extra hand length that's
how homer simpson became an arm wrestling champion remember that no homer simpson went to like um
i want to say the episode entailed him going to mBain's, who was like the Arnold Schwarzenegger
rip-off guy character.
He was going bankrupt,
and Homer goes to his yard sale,
and there's only one dumbbell for sale.
And Homer's like, yeah, I'll take it.
And Homer's so dumb,
he never switches arms.
And he just keeps curling
with like one arm
while he's drinking beer,
while he's watching TV,
and weeks go by,
and he's just enormous.
And Mo comes up with this gag where they can trick people.
He'll challenge people to an arm wrestling match,
and Mo will be like, hey, you want to make it interesting?
Let's make it $500.
And the guy's like, sure, because they're looking at Homer's weak side.
And then Homer turns around and produces this enormous fucking jacked left arm.
And they're just like, ah, come on.
There's so many good classic Simpsons episodes.
I want to get back in.
Oh, speaking of those shows that we'd spoken about recently we haven't seen in a while,
King of the Hill apparently just got added to Hulu.
Hulu.
I just saw that.
People have been tweeting it at me.
So that's great news.
Can you explain Hulu pricing? Is it like so much a month and then so much a month plus more to not
have advertising?
Yeah, it's $11.99 a month
I think if you don't want ads. That's what I have.
Yeah.
I think it's like $3 less if you have ads.
I think it's the same price as Netflix.
What is Netflix now?
They just went up. Maybe $12.
I really don't pay attention. And it depends on what
level and if
you're doing 4k and how many screens etc but uh yeah whatever it is it's worth it i was talking
some old men about this the other day like like i was uh i was with my dad and like and he two of
his friends had showed up they wanted to buy some stuff for from me and they're all in their 60s
and uh and they were like you know what we got? We got the Netflix over at our house.
It's got everything.
These guys are literally just discovering Netflix.
And I'm like, well, have you seen this show?
And they're like, no, I've checked.
And I'm like, tell them about Vikings.
I'm like, tell them about House of Cards.
And he takes out an actual pen and pad and he goes,
all right, well, I'm going to tune that in tonight.
That's good.
You know, ain't got no damn ads on it either i last thing i want to hear about is some mesothelioma or a class
action lawsuit that's all you hear about when you turn on regular tv and i'm like yeah that's
bullshit those are fox news ads not normal that's daytime tv ads that's what okay i don't know
that's that's local news ads. Old people shit.
Where it's all like, oh, is your back hurt?
Yeah, old time.
It might be someone else's fault.
That's really fun.
It's almost like the same kind of experience
that I would get showing matches to a tribesman
who had never seen them before. I get like when I got my grandma to start
work,
uh,
to figure out,
uh,
HBO and get her house,
not her house of cards,
her game of Thrones thing going because she's this old woman who grew up
without running water with an outhouse,
like never like lives in a rural ass area,
like not very good internet at all.
And like when she finally got it
to click because for the longest time she's like well taylor there's just not enough internet out
here it's not gonna it won't come through and it's like i'll figure it out for you all you know
what i ended up just doing for is i bought her every single season of the show because she wasn't
able to like scroll through it fast enough and like every time i would go back she'd be like oh taylor i just got to that part it called a red wedding and my god i did not know that was coming my god i love this
show i can't believe how much this is a good show and it's just like yeah grandma i'm so happy to
show you this my grandpa i'll be like grandpa do you ever do you want to watch game of thrones like
now it's like he's gonna sit here and watch professional bull riding chewing tobacco which those are his two of his very favorite things
man you know i'm gonna do that for my dad right now because like i
i yeah i'm gonna i'm gonna buy him the fucking game of thrones thing right now
he needs to see it i i he's seen like one like he came over to my house one
time and uh like i was i was trying to sell him on the show so i showed him
battle of the bastards and of course to me is the best episode they've ever made and he was just
like you weren't kidding this is incredible that was like a movie and i was like yeah i was like
and you don't even know like all the backstories you don't know why this was so fucking cool and
how evil that guy is and how wonderful this guy is and how annoying that redheaded bitch
is like sansa sansa sansa she uh she dressed up as morticia adams for halloween it was very hot
very hot i don't laugh yeah i don't i game of thrones has gone on so long and i don't mean like
it's gonna be be nine seasons total,
but 13 years or something?
I'm probably exaggerating.
I'm frustrated. I'm legitimately a lot older than I was when they
first started.
I feel a good bit older from
season six.
It's been four years or something. It's too long.
It's coming soon.
It's coming soon. Well, it's coming soon. It's coming soon.
I've been watching
seven years.
Season one was April 17th,
2011.
I didn't expect that. But how many seasons
have there been? I think seven,
right?
Seven years? That doesn't sound right. Anyway, I think I'm
stuck on it. I've been watching Daredevil
season three, which just came out on netflix very good very good i i hated season two season two
annoyed the fuck out of me i didn't like and not to just beat a dead horse here but like i don't
like weak female superheroes like like like and i don't mean weak physically i mean like
poorly like made i don't know. Elektra was just so annoying.
I didn't buy it.
I got no problem with Captain Marvel is going to be in the next Avengers.
I love that.
I'm familiar with that character.
Incredibly powerful.
Probably the most powerful member of the Avengers.
No problem that she's a woman because that's explained very well how she gets her powers.
And it makes a lot of sense.
But Elektra was just annoying, and then Stick.
Can you use the word weak?
In what way was she weak?
Was she scared too much?
No, no, no.
Weak as in the character is, they don't explain why she's such a badass.
She just studied karate real hard, harder than any professional athlete, I guess,
because she's beating up multiple men at once
and her name's electra so electra she doesn't have any electricity powers no no it's an act
her actual real world name is electra you know that's that's an actual like lady's name
well we're getting we're getting off topic she's i just i just hated her in the show and I also hated Stick who was Daredevil's mentor
who comes back as at least a 70
year old man who's blind
who's beating up
fit young men with guns
I just don't buy it
I have stretched my disbelief enough
to believe that Matt Murdock
a blind man can do all the
things that he does and I love that in the show.
Season one is incredible.
Season two was a huge letdown.
Season three I fucking love because Vincent D'Onofrio, who plays Fisk, the kingpin, fucking kills it.
He's so evil and devious and not evil in the mustache twiddling kind of like, I just love being evil kind of way. He's got a goal in mind, and he's got clearly defined mental issues
that make him a psychopathic, broken personality kind of person
who will stop at no end to get what he wants.
And he's also a fucking criminal genius, mastermind type character.
And on top of all that that he's super fucking strong so every
now and then he like like at one point he's in a car with a guy who's his who works for him this
isn't a spoiler because it and he and he's mad at that guy not necessarily for something that guy
did just for some information that they got relayed to him and he goes take off your coat
and the guy's like sir take off your coat give it to me
the guy takes off his sports jacket kingpin wraps it around the guy's head and starts punching him
in the face and beats him to death just right there and and the driver's like like looking up
in the mirror and he's like find somewhere to get rid of the body you're just like oh fuck he's he's
so hardcore they introduced a new villain this
season very good season um matt murdoch is uh has played very well daredevil that that character
um i i like i get annoyed with the side characters foggy his very chubby unattractive
partner who who seemingly has like a gorgeous girlfriend now inexplicably and and that
redheaded chick who used to be in uh true blood you know like the young vampire whose virginity
kept growing back and she annoys the fuck out of me she's just she needs to go away i think i have
this daredevil lore right he got his superpowers because a toxic spill happened and it got him?
He was nine years old and this truck of toxic chemicals tipped over, splashed in his eyes. And I'm pretty sure that the lore has to do with...
It's the same stuff as the Ninja Turtles, yes.
Right.
And the guy that trains him is Stick.
And the guy that trains the Ninja Turtles is Splinter because he's little.
That's all correct
yes i think that's yeah yeah and uh so so you know he's not only he's blind but all of his
other senses are super duper high and then one would imagine that had the ooze not going in his
eyes it had gone in his mouth then he just wouldn't have been able to taste anything but he'd have been
able to see like a hawk and hear everything right right? Like, I don't know. It would have worked out better for him.
Oh, why didn't it go in my butthole?
Shit.
Hi.
So, yeah, season three of Daredevil has entertained me thoroughly.
I just finished it last night.
Very good season.
Liked it a lot.
The new villain, who is, they don't name him.
That's one thing they do well is like it's kind of cheesy
if you're immediately like call me daredevil i've picked that name so they really don't do that so
much that the the the the public kind of names him daredevil he doesn't really go by that and
the same thing with kingpin in the comics you know he's like i'm the kingpin but in this it's like
we don't use his name here we use his his code name. What's his code name?
We call him the Kingpin.
He doesn't call himself Kingpin.
That's his code name and his evil organization.
And likewise, there's a character who, I believe it's Bullseye in the comics.
He was played by Colin Farrell in the shitty Daredevil movie.
But in this, he's played by an absolute Norman Bates psychopathic motherfucker who hears voices in his head
and murdered birds and small animals as a child
and is just a scary fucker
who can just throw things,
which sounds lame,
but he'll get in a fight
and he'll just start throwing office supplies at you
super accurately, right?
Scissors and staplers,
and everybody's just like,
oh my god, it's an
onslaught of fucking
staples. Does he have a gun with him ever?
Yes, yes. He often
begins with the gun, but if that,
if he loses the gun, then he
goes to throw it. Then he's got a stapler.
He's like, quick, we gotta chase him into Office Max!
No, that's just what he wants!
He's in the pen section!
He does that.
He does that.
He's throwing stuff with perfect accuracy.
He'll ricochet bullets off something and hit people with them.
It's this talent that he has.
I remember watching that original Daredevil movie.
Maybe there's one from a long time ago I'm not familiar with.
But the one with Ben Affleck and then the guy Bullseye with his,
he like at one point like takes out a paper clip and like,
like throws it and they're like, this guy's dying.
And like, I remember watching that scene for the first time.
I may have been in theaters.
And I was like, wow, that's dumb.
Like that's really, that took me out of this.
You already have me watching a blind guy, like, clap his way around the city,
trying to figure out where he's going, tripping on things,
writing his congressman for more ramps or whatever he would do.
And now you've got a guy throwing staples at people?
Come on.
Yeah, at least you would buy, like, shurikens or something, right?
Yeah, yeah.
Like a ninja star.
You'd have something cool made for throwing.
Or no, his thing wasn't that it was just throwing.
He was accurate with like anything, right?
Everything.
And the same in the Netflix adaptation.
Like it's anything.
He shoots accurately.
Like you see a flashback where he used a baseball to kill someone.
Like anything that he uses or utilizes, he's incredibly accurate with.
So, like, he'd worked as a sniper.
He was in the military.
He was an FBI sniper.
Like, he's got this whole background.
What's his name again?
The character's name is Poindexter.
But the villain's name in comics is known as Bullseye.
Oh, wait.
Oh, never mind.
Thinking of Deadeye dead i mixed them up yeah
yeah yeah a lot of people do that the character that will smith played in uh in that um suicide
squad movie that movie sucked that was awful i have tried to watch it twice and i still haven't
seen the end that movie is so bad i watched it all the way through and don't remember the end so
we're on the same i mean it, it's possible I have two.
There you go.
I wanted that chick to die the whole time.
Margot Robbie.
What do you want, Mr. J?
And it's like, ah.
Margot Robbie's hot enough to carry me through anything.
I really liked her in Wolf of Wall Street
where she goes, full frontal nudity.
Brightened, enhanced, brightened, enhanced.
Brightened, enhanced. Brightened, enhanced. Brightened, enhanced.
Dude, different topic.
Mexico has legalized pot now? Really? When did that happen?
Super recently.
Hang on. I'm sorry.
This is a good point. Everybody's going to be like, oh, tell us more
about the legal weed. Let me get two
ads in before they
can look away.
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People go, oh, I like those. And they think
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They were very affordable.
I like them a lot.
Whenever someone is in the market for sunglasses, I link them to the ones that I use.
And they're the movement brand sunglasses.
I like them a lot.
Very cool.
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I've been watching some of that content.
Looks very cool.
Shroud's been streaming it a bunch.
If you're looking for someone who's streaming, head on over there.
Check him out.
He seems to like Fallout a lot.
And, of course, his incredible skills don't really translate to that world.
Everybody's about at the same skill level when you're in the Fallout universe, but it's fun
to watch him play.
So you're telling me that Mexico
has now legalized marijuana? Is that a thing?
Yes.
Kind of like when we got gay marriage.
It didn't happen through the legislature, it happened through
the courts. They ruled four to
one. The Supreme Court, I guess, has five people
on it. And the one that ruled against
Pot didn't even
have a problem with pot he just felt like he had a problem with pot smoke and he's like yeah i don't
want one guy to infringe on the rights of someone else for like clean air and that's it now mexico
has legal pot and canada has legal pot above and below us we're trapped between these these pot
heads no that's awesome because now it's just another step in the right direction for the U.S.
Yeah, I feel like they normalize it, right?
That's what it is.
When you look around, you're like, you know what?
A lot of other countries do it.
We wouldn't be weird.
Yeah.
I don't know anyone who passionately is anti-weed at this point.
The most resistance I'll hear from people
is like, you know what?
I personally don't do it and I don't think
it is good for people. I think it makes them lazy
but I think it should
be legal.
Maybe there are people out there that I'm not watching
but that seems to be the response.
That culture has changed.
I'm talking about day-to-day people.
I hear you. I think what you described
is not far from me. i i don't have a high level of confidence on the lazy thing and i
can certainly point to examples where that's not true but just in my own like personal universe
there's examples where it is true and uh so that's a thing um but here's where here's what
changed my mind didn't happen that long ago,
like five or six years ago.
I sort of thought like,
what's the greater evil for America,
right?
For America,
would the,
as a society,
we'd be better off if we threw people in jail for this,
like minor personal decision,
or would we better off if we didn't throw them in jail for this?
And it's like, man, you you know like if it's meth maybe we do need a strong deterrent if it's pot so what are we
against again cheetos cheeto consumption like it's just it's not worth it to put them in jail for
this it's a bad societal decision and that's how I changed my mind. Yeah, totally agree with you.
There's no excuse for it anymore.
And I don't know what the actual stat is, but it's not just a majority.
It's the overwhelming majority of Americans now of all ages and stripes that are in favor of legalizing it.
I wonder if you – old people vote better than young people.
They just do.
I wonder if you just looked at voters
how much that gets swayed towards because i also feel like old people are less pot friendly than
young you know my parents don't want it my parents look at amsterdam and netherlands or whatever and
and they're just like yeah it's not good you don't want that it really is a negative thing
uh you know it's dirty it's stinky it's this this. It's that. They're looking to undo it, they tell me.
I don't know if that's true.
They're saying they're trying to go back and make it
illegal again.
That might be a more
common thought of people.
What's a 70 rule? A
sejititarian?
Septuagenarian, I think. That's what I'm looking for.
Yeah, septuagenarians.
Septuagenarians never miss a voting what i'm looking for yeah septuagenarians and septuagenarians
never miss a voting day oh they're always there bright and early this place doesn't open early
enough uh so yeah that might be why it's been slow to change chis you do you have the link um
for the preschool fight club uh Right here. Thank you.
So, apparently, a preschool has been running,
well, a fight club,
where, as you might imagine,
teachers look on and cheer
while toddlers fight it out
wearing Hulk smash gloves.
And you might think,
what kind of damage could they do?
This little monster has this other kid
in fucking side control just to move away from a crucifix and he's grounded pounding this
motherfucker with some hulk gloves while the teacher literally dances yeah let's watch this
i'm working on it yeah skype is a weird thing where sometimes you click on the link and it
pretends you clicked on a different one
on the link in it. Pretend you clicked on a different one.
Fucking pop-ups.
I'm almost there, boys.
No worries. Yeah, you're good.
Alright, I'm ready.
Ready, set, play.
Here at Adventure Learning Center on Gravois
organized a one-day fight club
in 2016 when the heater broke
and they were trying to entertain the kids.
Regulators did not shut down the place, but they increased inspections and found other types of violations. THE TEACHER WAS IN THE ROOM WITH HIS I-PAD. THE TEACHER WAS IN THE ROOM WITH HIS I-PAD. THE TEACHER WAS IN THE ROOM
WITH HIS I-PAD.
THE TEACHER WAS IN THE ROOM
WITH HIS I-PAD.
THE TEACHER WAS IN THE ROOM
WITH HIS I-PAD.
THE TEACHER WAS IN THE ROOM
WITH HIS I-PAD.
THE TEACHER WAS IN THE ROOM
WITH HIS I-PAD.
THE TEACHER WAS IN THE ROOM
WITH HIS I-PAD.
THE TEACHER WAS IN THE ROOM
WITH HIS I-PAD.
THE TEACHER WAS IN THE ROOM
WITH HIS I-PAD.
THE TEACHER WAS IN THE ROOM
WITH HIS I-PAD.
THE TEACHER WAS IN THE ROOM
WITH HIS I-PAD.
THE TEACHER WAS IN THE ROOM WITH HIS I-PAD. THE TEACHER WAS IN THE ROOM WITH HIS I-PAD. THE TEACHER WAS IN THE ROOM One teacher is excited jumping up and down while the other teacher puts her fists on preschoolers mother Nicole
Murseil cannot watch without
He doesn't understand why his so
Him why he got beat up by his best friends and it was on his fourth birthday
Fight begins the kids fall a teacher kicks in the air and excitement
The only person who tries breaking it up is another preschooler. But he cannot stop one child from pounding the other's head into the floor. They're fighting. Mersil believes it only stopped because her older son tested her video. She called the director to stop it. He said that the daycare workers were making them fight, not helping them.
Daycare cameras recorded at least 30 minutes, fight after fight.
Video Murciel says can be monitored by staff.
Though what happened nearly two years ago, Murciel does not think enough was done.
I want them to be held accountable, and I don't want this to happen to any other child.
The police report says the director immediately fired both teachers and called the child a news hotline.
The St. Louis Secret Attorney's Office declined to prosecute.
I reached out to both teachers, who made no comment.
Though state regulators substantially complained, the Venture Learning Center continued operating normally,
but with increased inspections, eight visits since documented 26 wide-ranging violations, though none exactly like the Pike Club incident.
March 2018.
Four-year-old child said a teacher cussed at him, flicked him, grabbed him, and pushed him to the ground.
Also this year, a quote agency staff member observed a caregiver grab a child approximately by the arm and dragged him to the ground.
The director was standing in his classroom and did not respond. Oh yeah!
You're playing with my box?
I'm gonna send you back
to the cubby.
Oh yeah!
When you come into this four-cornered Lincoln Log
ring, you know
what you're getting.
I'm bringing the pain.
And the winner of the juice box
invitational.
Dude,
look, I watched it
and I reacted like I was horrified.
Did you think that maybe it wasn't
quite as bad as they made it out to be?
That was a big Hulk glove.
No, it's pretty terrible to make children fight that aggressively in daycare
when they're clearly confused and their only perspective towards an authority figure at the time
is that figure jumping up and down, clapping and cheering them on.
The kids crying too.
Taylor, have you considered?
Yeah.
Okay, okay, okay.
Half of the kids didn't enjoy it.
But the winners really had a good time.
You know what?
I hadn't considered that.
Think about the self-esteem boost that guy who was crucifix pounding the other one got.
That kid, future CEO.
All this anti-St. Louis media stuff.
They don't talk about all the many daycares here where they're not fight clubs.
They never look at the winners
and think about what a great time they had.
And you know who else had a great time?
Teachers.
Man, those teachers,
they, you know, I don't think
they were very good at their job.
This is better than a no-fat.
How could you say something both so bold and courageous?
I know, I'm a brave brave guy a lot of hot takes but yeah that's that's really oh it is reprehensible dude i would feel so terrible if my kid was involved in that oh yeah you'd be livid at that
teacher like yeah you'd want to go after more than just her job you'd be like no you can't this is
like illegal like cliff hutchinson would tell you this is not only against the rules, but the law as well.
You can't force children to fight,
even if you put a Hulk glove on there.
It is funny, though.
It's pretty funny.
It's crazy.
I mean, I would have done well.
Those are our best topics.
Illegal and funny.
Dude.
Get both of those combined.
All right.
Pick a topic boys scientists processed 109 hours of oral sex to
develop an ai that sucks dick or uh the department of i'm sorry the drug enforcement administration
is warning people of laced halloween candy i want to hear that and if it's like actually legit
because you always hear about this every year but every year like it seems like there's more Halloween candy. I want to hear that and if it's actually legit because
you always hear about this every year
but every year it seems like there's more
stories saying, hey, don't fall
for the hype. People aren't putting razor blades
in candy and not dosing your children with LSD.
Yeah, it's bullshit.
I was listening to the Stern show and Robin
was talking about this and Stern was
like, is anyone actually doing
this? Isn't weed expensive and it's
like yeah of course no one is and robin's like don't you remember when we were kids and you
didn't have to worry about this and it's like this is exactly what a dumb ignorant and uninformed
person says about crime statistics and child molestation and violence any violence gun violence
drunk driving, anything,
because all those numbers are record lows, especially when they were kids.
There just wasn't this enormous news media propagating this idea, fear-mongering people into getting ratings,
and that's all we're talking about now.
And it's especially worse because Robin is the fucking news lady.
When I was a kid, it wasn't drugs.
Or maybe it was a tiny bit.
But it was mostly like razor blade and broken glass and things like that.
Razor blade.
That's what I always heard.
And it was popularized enough that my parents checked all my candy.
They'd go to the kitchen table and they'd just look for broken packaging and stuff like that.
I don't know, honey.
There's nothing in here.
We even sent them to the bad part of town.
Dude, we were, yeah.
On Halloween, there were no rules on me at a really young age.
We were just gone until 10 p.m.
All the other trick-or-treaters were gone.
All the houses wanted to stop giving out candy.
We'd be like, trick-or-treat.
And they'd be like, still? It's 10 p. p.m and we're like do you have any some had no candy left but we would we didn't use
halloween things we needed to use um uh like king-sized pillowcases to carry do you remember
what you dressed up as as a kid like like when you like your earliest costume do you remember it
earliest shucks i don't remember. My brother was...
Woody's going as Captain Darkness this year.
He's wearing all black.
My brother was a vampire a lot, and he did wear all black.
But no, I had a bunch of costumes.
A lot of times I would choose my costume, and in hindsight, they sucked.
Like those completely plastic Spider-Man things with the face masks the elastic band in the back
they break like i couldn't walk very far before i had a big embarrassing like
slice in the plastic pants so yeah and then she made some too my mom was actually pretty good for
halloween i always wanted to be a vampire as a kid like every year i was a fucking vampire and
and uh you know my mom would make me a cool costume. I had this red velvet sash thing.
And I had a cape.
And I had face paint.
And my hair was black and slick black.
I had the fangs and everything.
I always wanted to be a vampire.
Still do.
I like biting sexy ladies.
What can I say?
It's just...
I want that to be a thing.
You're selling it.
Not a big fan of blood.
Also, you get superpowers.
I was a pirate a lot as a kid.
A pirate and an Indian. I did those both a lot as a kid. A pirate and an Indian.
I did those both a couple times.
Ooh, that's cultural appropriation.
Can't do that now.
Cultural appropriation.
Believe it or not, five-year-olds don't care.
They're just like, hey, I want to look like the Indian from the Davy Jones movie I watch five times a day.
And it's like, fine, if you'll stop talking for two seconds, Taylor, Christ.
I saw another woman lose her job over blackface.
And this one I have a harder time supporting.
So here's the scoop.
She dressed as Beyonce.
And again, like as a high level,
like a lot of times people on Halloween are dressing up as someone they consider a hero or like whatever.
And if your hero is Beyonce, then that's cool.
But the thing is, her husband was Jay-Z.
And I recognize that Jay-Z does have big lips,
but her husband looked...
What's it called? A minstrel show?
He painted lips on?
I don't know if he painted them on.
Dude, there was something enhanced about lips going on there.
And Jay-Z, that...
Dude, so I've kind of said,
I understand where Megyn Kelly's coming from.
If you want to be Diana Ross, and that, your little hero, then knock yourself out.
That doesn't seem, like, insulting to me.
It should be a thing that we have grown past.
But this woman, even though she was okay, her husband, there was some guilt by association there.
I've told the story before, but I'll never forget that Halloween party I went to with my girlfriend maybe five years ago i'm gonna say and everybody i was i mean i was dressed as a catholic priest
and i was trying to get my girlfriend to go as an altar boy like like i'm okay with edgy costumes
it's funny it's a costume party we're all drinking and stuff and then one of her friends showed up
as kim kardashian and her boyfriend came as kanye west with blackface really awful blackface and like
as much as we joke about it when you see it in real life it's it's honestly offensive like really
like it's honestly i bet it is like like we were not okay with it we were in a you know parties
break up in little groups and like whatever like we i was on the back porch with maybe five other individuals,
like girls and guys, and we're all drunk and shit.
We're partying.
And I'm like, that's kind of fucked up.
Do you see?
I don't know that guy, but Christy's boyfriend?
You see?
They're like, yes.
The guy with the lips painted on?
Yes, we all noticed, and we're all thinking about it.
So I'm showing this to the audience now.
This is the one that I did.
Can you look at the picture too yeah yeah i'll pull it
up tell me if you can see it through the same lenses oh my god that's so racist the woman
take a pause take it take a break let's put a study on this could you say that the woman is
just dressing up as her hero no no not the girl not the girl either. You know what she looks like?
No.
She looks like from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
when Dee dresses up as that Latina woman.
Can I talk to yous?
Yeah, when she's out there doing that.
You white boys!
Yeah.
I don't know.
Maybe I just can't see it.
I see her.
She looks pretty, I guess.
I think what the difference is, is that
next to him
with painted on lips,
a guy dressed as
Hitler, they'd be like, you know, I don't
like it, but look at the guy next to him.
Like, that guy's
stealing the attention because that's, there's no
I don't like the chain either.
Does Jay-Z wear that chain?
That's genuine blackface. He's got lips painted on. I don't think there's any room for Jay-Z wear that chain? That's genuine blackface.
He's got lips painted on.
I don't think there's any room for squabbling.
Could that be his face by contrast?
Is he a white dude?
He's even putting his lips in a purse like that
to try and make kind of a mocking look, you know?
Yeah, he I cannot get on the same team with.
There's something going on.
Her, if she was by herself i'd be like dude she's
just trying to be beyonce yeah are you allowed to do other faces like like we know black faces
off limits uh-huh can you do red face you can obviously do white face because nobody's gonna
get mad on behalf of you know impersonating a white person yeah but like you've got my
permission to be me asian face uh indian face like indian face people get upset about
what you mean like uh well people get upset about the cultural dress yeah yeah people don't like
i mean but i don't i don't think that like actual like american indians or native americans like
care like i think it's kind of the same thing as like the the redskins team where like when
you actually ask those people they're like like, I don't really care.
Savage Americans.
You know what?
Jesus Christ.
I forgot that we changed our nomenclature a little,
a few episodes ago.
I'll change it.
I'll make an adjustment to it.
I'll make a tradition of it.
I honestly thought Kyle was about to tell Taylor
to be more sensitive.
I thought that's where that was going.
Kyle was going to tell me to be more sensitive.
I mean, in hindsight, it seems so dumb, but that's where I thought that's where that was going. Kyle was going to tell me to be more sensitive. I mean, in hindsight, it seems so dumb,
but that's where I thought that was headed.
I watched Left My Heart and Wounded Knee
and laughed and laughed.
I don't care.
They were cannibals.
They were literally cannibalistic,
torturing, warring tribes.
Yes, cannibals.
It's okay to be a cannibal
if you use every part of the human.
I think they just ate the heart.
That is really wasteful.
Oh yeah, I wonder
if cannibal tribes
have like,
oh no, we do not eat the left foot
very much.
Or if they're eating every little bit.
I would think every little bit.
The reason they would have cannibalism in the first place
is because they're pretty low on food, right?
Unless it was like a spiritual thing, or's like oh we eat the the cap the
people we capture in battles i need you to do more than just eat all of me taylor i want you to use
my bones as tools uh yeah you know like do stuff if you're not drinking out of my skull then i'm a
little offended that you're being so wasteful what What if they made you into a shitty end table
in one of the bad parts of town?
That would be the worst.
A leather skin around my rib cage.
I still look like me.
I want my forearm whittled down
to be the spoon of a king or something.
You don't want to be some bullshit post-dead bone thing.
I really don't care what you do with my bones after I'm gone.
Just throw me in the trash!
It doesn't matter.
But yeah, she's blackface, and
I couldn't get on board with this one.
Especially because she's next to him.
Yeah, this one is definitely racist.
My thing about the whole blackface thing is, like,
a lot of people find it to be offensive and racist,
so just don't fucking do it.
Like, there are a lot of things
that's like, whoa, whoa, don't step on my right to express myself in a b a way b way c way this is not one of
the ways that i ever want to express myself okay like like so so i am perfectly fine with this just
being outlawed it's funny because i am like look i don't desire to do blackface or anything i'm not
feeling i'm losing anything but my pro blackface position
is almost to advance equal rights like like can we stop i don't know like treating people
walking on eggshells i feel like we're we're doing something to eliminate racism by not
pointing racist at everything yeah and as, you will all be allowed to paint yourselves
as any race you want, but mainly black.
Hey, Taylor, don't you dare have LeBron James as your personal hero.
You can't be him.
That seems wronger to me than the word wronger.
Yeah, I wish that it was less sensitive.
I will agree with that because I wish
that, for example, one of our punishments
could be that someone has to come in blackface
and it not being a
whole debacle, right? I feel like if
one of us actually did that, then
Taylor would lose his job.
Or there'd be an uprising of people who
hated us because they thought that we were
genuinely being hateful in some way.
Nobody would be on our side.
Nobody would be on our side.
When in reality, I just think it'd be a silly thing to do.
And just comical.
It wouldn't be racist for us to do it.
We would actually make the news.
Maybe.
Maybe.
Like, it'd be hilarious.
Next YouTuber, Woody's Gamertag. Where's my face gamer tag yeah that but yeah that's the thing i
i feel like they say black heroes are off limits i guess that's the the thing i hadn't expressed
before and that i don't like that i don't really think you have to do the face thing though to like
even dress up as i'm like if i dress up as lebron james and i wear lebron or james or whatever on
the back they're like oh like, oh, that's
clearly who it is. Whereas, like,
if some little black kid wants to dress
up as Spider-Man or Peter Parker or whatever,
he doesn't paint his face white. He wears a Spider-Man
outfit, and you go, ah, I've put the pieces
together. Like, I don't
really think you need to do the face-painting thing.
Yeah, you don't get to
dress as Spider-Man if you're black, though.
Well, it is cultural appropriation, but I'll allow a huge spider-man he's one of ours you go be green lantern i thought he was
yeah i don't know there's different iterations green lantern is the holder of the green lantern
ring uh there's been lots of guys thank you woody thank you okay i didn't answer but there's been black guys and white guys oh no
oh we did this one already did we do the gea halloween lace candy is that if we did
yeah yeah we talked about that basically it's not a thing because because nobody wants to give away
their expensive drugs there's a link here for a kid that tested positive for, uh, for meth. Yeah. That kid has lying parents.
That's what that is.
Yeah.
Tommy got it from,
uh,
from,
uh,
someone's house.
We're not sure which one.
Uh,
I read the article,
the DEA one,
and it's not what I thought it was before I like looked into it.
What I thought it was going to be was people taking your three musketeers and
like, I don't know, injecting
pot butter into it and then not letting you, it's like fooling you. These are like knockoff brand
pot candy, like Keef Cat, Twixt, Rastateers, Rasta Reese's. So I'm guessing this is something that you can buy at a dispensary,
and I don't know who would give it out.
Like, do you guys, have you ever heard, like,
how much it costs for, like, a pot Keef cat?
I don't know what those are.
We saw prices of stuff when we were in Colorado.
Yeah, they're not cheap.
They're not cheap.
Like, for one thing, yeah, I'm going to break it down a little bit. We saw prices of stuff when we were in Colorado. They're not cheap. They're not cheap.
For one thing, I'm going to break it down a little bit.
Usually, you're buying a whole container of chocolates.
There'll be eight chocolates in there, and it'll be $18 or something like that.
Each one is 10 milligrams.
I think that's the general average dosage or the required dosage, the maximum,
unless you're a medical patient when those guys get that scary shit but uh again like it's just you wouldn't do that because you're gonna get caught and it's in like they're often very easily identifiable like the 10 milligrams and
like a pot leaf or something is often like uh is it embossed like like imprinted into it on this
one there's a pretty big sticker that says 10X, which I'm assuming means that.
Yeah.
This one says 3X. Okay.
Sometimes they do this thing where they literally
paint the item with some sort of
edible writing
and it's written on it
in white if it's chocolate or
green if it's
whatever it is. If it's some sort of gummy
candy or something like that.
I just don't believe anyone's actually doing that. You'd be in so much trouble for one thing if you're dosing kids we like we talked about it before the show it seems
like the downsides are way bigger than the upsides first of all you're drugging children i yeah i
don't know what i'm sure there's laws against that right like i'm positive there are yeah yeah i don't
know what it is exactly but
it seems like drugging children is something there'd be a law against uh you're giving
something expensive to someone who doesn't want it and presumably you do that's just a bad thing
that people don't do right like like yeah it i can't think of what it is you know if i had
something i really valued and you didn't we'll make it my paramotor, and I gave it to you,
why would I do that?
I was handing out Gatorade bottles, the green kind,
but what I actually did was hand out bottles of really nice absinthe
I had to import from Denmark.
And it's like, how much did you spend to do this prank?
And it's like, thousands, man.
It's like, what's the payoff?
Not much, frankly. I gave away a lot of expensive booze, and they're going to man it's like what's the payoff you know not much frankly yeah like i gave
away a lot of expensive booze they walk away and i imagine what happens i'm sick in the head what
could i say i do think it's probably more likely that this kid ate something that his parents had
around than that one because like if this were the case it would be a score of ohio boys that
went to this area or region
all got dosed you know we're trying to narrow down the house that did it like it just seems
like it'd be weird for a person to just give one one candy and they said it was methamphetamine
a pot and methamphetamine marijuana laced and methamphetamine laced that's that kid was how
old was the kid five five i was gonna say he's buying it at
school and like because like yeah adderall adderall is a methamphet he actually wins it after his
fight he's got some trt kit kats as well i don't know that's bizarre i just don't i don't think I certainly don't think it's widespread
I'm sure somewhere someone's doing it
Just like somewhere someone is having ear sex
But it's not widespread
And something we need to be worried about
It's just a distraction
Yeah, it's not something I've ever been into
Dude, you know what's a distraction?
These things
This is lurking over me as a competition
That's going to be sprung on me On an unknown day
It could be tomorrow, it could be next week
But at some point I'm going to have to
Devote myself to raising my pulse
Which is a ridiculous thing to do
I'm excited for finally getting it ready
Yeah, as soon as I get it fixed
And I'll tell you guys
At the top of that evening
So that we all have the same opportunity
The next day to start it.
I'm not going to get it fixed at 9 a.m.
and then at 4 go,
all right, let's kick it off.
I'll tell you as soon as we do
so we can get it rolling.
Yeah, for sure.
Because we'll have a rolling start here, right?
I have genuine jitters over this.
Really?
Yeah.
I think it's going to be fun.
It's like a... I don't want to eat that chip,? I think it's going to be fun. It's like a stressful event
that's coming up.
I have to kill myself for a month.
It's not going to be that bad.
It's going to be fun.
It will be if you do it right.
No matter what,
it's going to lose some weight.
It's going to get in shape.
It's going to feel better.
I got 250 meps today
Meps is that word
The agreed upon pronunciation
And I think I need
300 to 400 meps a day
To remain competitive
Based on what Rogan's crew
How long did it take you to get that?
Two hours
Two and a half hours
But it wasn't
What I found was that
Most of the meps were earned
Actually doing shit.
I thought there'd be a bunch of free MEPs involved.
Like, yeah, I'm going to work out or whatever, do my activity.
I was kiting my paraglider.
And then for the next 40 minutes, I need to do just minimal stuff and I'll keep earning.
Didn't go like that so much.
Really, the MEPs are earned by working hard.
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm looking forward to,
I bought a,
uh,
I actually have it here down.
I just haven't put it together yet.
I bought an exercise bike,
like a cheap,
uh,
you did a foldable one that like,
it was only like 140 bucks or something pretty cheap on Amazon.
And then I bought one of those under a desk or under a table,
like,
uh,
elliptical things that you can stand on or you can sit down and do it.
Everyone's investing to make this thing.
Well, I mean, I'm trying to like think of anything I can that I can max out on the little
time that I have.
And so like if I can bang out, you know, a couple meps a day on that under the desk thing,
it's worth it.
And I only spent like 70 bucks on that, not 350.
I spent less than you.
I hope mine's good enough.
Yeah, I got a $60 one.
Can you stand on yours?
No.
Mine pedals.
It showed up today. I haven't taken it out of the box.
But it's like a central heavy station
with two pedals that stick out of it.
I think I can do it
at my desk. I had the aspiration
of, I thought it would be entertaining if I tried to pedal for an entire PKA.
You know, I thought that, what if I could keep myself in, like, the bottom range of effort for an entire PKA?
I thought that would be kind of interesting.
We've got to have a rule that we can't be doing this during PKA or it's going to make for bad shows.
Oh, if it starts, like, taking away from, like, the show.
If I'm like, all right, I've got to go take a 10-minute break.
If it starts taking away from the show,
if I'm like, I've got to go take a 10-minute break.
If I see you pedaling,
we're literally in a race.
I can't be like, I'm not going to pedal.
We're all going to be pedaling our stupid machines.
It'll be the stupid show.
Taylor might be right.
I don't know.
I think people would like it. We should be able to do it on the show.
All right.
Or we could do it.
I have an idea.
What if I lift a weight? Let's circle back. show all right all right or we could do it what if i left away what if i left away wait let's
circle back what if we find a way to display our pulse during the show because i think that would
change it all right i don't know exactly how i could do it if i could share my phone or something
but i i just feel like if during the show we peddled and showed our pulse the whole time
that would be interesting to a viewer perhaps i don't know we'll think about it she just thinks it's a terrible idea
i've got my watch um but i don't know how you get a camera on it yeah wait so you only have to wear
the watch now or do you still have to wear that thing on your chest i have to wear the thing on
my chest but but my readout will be here, so I can keep track of it more readily
than opening my phone up and
dealing with the phone.
Yeah.
Well, I'm hoping that bike comes in handy
and it isn't a piece of shit.
You could have gotten Wing's bike.
Wing said that all that's wrong with it is the chain's
off, the one that's been sitting behind him for years.
Well, that could take a few years to repair, Kyle.
Give him some slack. I didn't get a real bike i got an exercise bike
to like set up yeah like he doesn't have a real bike either he's got like one of those like
recumbent bikes or whatever you call them i don't know one of those resistance yeah i yeah i have a
bunch of i don't actually i want to talk about it but i want to share all my strategies so maybe a
few weeks in i'll tell you what i was i might learn i was thinking about that for a bit and then
i was like i'm not keeping anything secret that all three of them haven't thought of like yeah
i would think i think i think like the idea of like like cheese points is just silly because
because it's just not going to add up to to any and i think it might be bad for you as well like
if you tried to to drink so much
caffeine, for example, that your heart rate was just elevated
all day, that's scary. I wouldn't do
that to my body. That's short term.
I literally wouldn't do that to my body.
I think the only way to do
this thing is to put effort
in, to genuinely try
and whether it's
cardio. Even if you're doing jumping jacks,
we're all getting kind of silly with it with the machines and stuff i realize that it's for me it's not that i think
that buying the rowing machine is the only way to win this thing i got the rowing machine because
the investment is what motivates me just like i used to talk about with supplements i don't really
believe that i think creatine is just such a tiny advantage with when you're trying to like build
muscle i think protein powder same thing thing. Pre-workout,
same thing. But if I spend $150 on those things, then that's a motivation for me. It's like, hey,
come on, don't quit. You mentally said you're going to do six sets of this. You're at three
and you're tired, but you need to get to six. You got $40 for the shit like courting through
your veins right now. You're literally invested in this. Yes, I'm literally investing in this.
It's a motivator for me to spend the money on these things.
And also, you know, talking shit to you guys.
That's a motivator too.
I'm not as confident as I say I am.
This is scary.
This is ridiculous.
No, no, you're...
Well, you know, not...
Everything you say on a comedy show is taken...
You can't back out now.
Literally.
No, I...
Kyle seems to really hate the Indians.
He keeps talking about a new genocide.
Come on. No, I've
just been honest. That's what I do on the show
most of the time.
I...
I am not confident,
but I'm trying hard.
And that's the way I've entered athletics
my entire life.
And I want some stuff
like it just because i'm sitting here like you know man i'm when i'm nervous about this
doesn't mean that my 100 might not carry me through this like i i think we're all gonna
do better than we're we're thinking i want to yeah i just don't think i'm gonna be able to do
well enough to get any better than third the The Rogan show is out there to compare ourselves to.
They're going to come in at like 11,000 through 9,000.
If our rankings come in like 3,000 through 1,500, I'm going to be like, oh, we suck.
I don't want that to happen.
Oh, that won't happen.
You know Joe Rogan's body was literally breaking down at the end, and he was pissing like brown.
Are you serious?
He said it looked like iced tea.
What does that mean?
Like he's so dehydrated?
He said his muscles were breaking down.
Yeah.
They weren't getting any chance to repair themselves.
He was going so hard, like exhausting himself every day for so long
that his muscle tissue was breaking down, and he's pissing it out.
Which has an interesting effect on you.
Jesus.
Oh, do we know the scores?
The final scores?
Are they done?
Are they posted?
Because it was closer second through third than you'd guess.
Yeah.
And I don't know that Joe was out of striking distance of a guy that can run 15 miles in
a day.
I think he was.
I think that Joe would just murder them.
If Joe's peeing sweet tea and he has to lay down,
meanwhile, this guy can bust out a marathon?
Joe's final score is here,
Chiz says.
11,253
meps.
That is a number.
Holy shit.
I can't argue with that.
11,253, you that. 11,253 you said?
11,253.
That's 375 MEPs a day.
I got 247 MEPs today.
Tom Segura got 9,533.
Burt Kreischer, 9,038.
Somehow I may have skipped over second place I got 246 maps today
Yeah I don't see Ari's score
So if I did what I did
I just need to go a little harder than today
Daily
Even 250 a day like what you got today
As a rolling average would be really good
At least in my mind
I don't think it wins
Oh Ari got 10,000
and 16. Just hypothetically,
what is 246
times 30?
That would get me
7380, so that won't do it.
Yeah, we're not competing against Joe Rogan.
Yeah, well, I don't know.
See, that's why I worked out today. I want to learn
what 246
MEPS feels like.
Were you doing a lot of weights or all
cardio? What was kind of the mix?
You know what's hard to say, Taylor?
I don't know. This morning was
so long ago.
Actually, a lot of it
was running up and down a hill.
I said I was kiting my paraglider, but what I really was doing was flying down a hill that's like i said i was kiting my paraglider
but what i really was doing was flying down a hill so i just carry that shit up the hill fly down
and repeat um there's also some waiting involved because i'd wait for a gust so that's did you get
more from paramotoring than you thought you would it wasn't i guess of course because you were kind
of doing it in up and down yeah so paramotoring i haven't tested yet that would be just running from the ground and sitting in a
chair for an hour this was kiting so it it's when you stand on the ground and operate the controls
and it's more work just put on a just just get up in the air put on a blindfold
yeah i don't know if i'm at 10,000 feet or 10 feet. I hear traffic, though.
Yeah.
Yeah, no, I don't think paramotoring might keep me in the minimum range,
you know, but it's not going to be a score or anything.
It's not an easy way to get.
There's no easy way to get meps.
I thought maybe there was.
I tested, like, doing dishes and shit.
Not getting any meps out of that. I'll tell you what. I had tested doing dishes and shit. Not getting any meps out of that.
I'll tell you what.
I was so angry.
I was so angry trying to set my machine up today.
I was earning a mep a minute.
My heart rate was like 102 when I was trying to make the thing work.
I was furious.
We're talking about what machine?
The MZ3. I plugged this thing in and charged it for like, curious trying to get i'll tell you we're talking about what machine the the the mz3 like i i plug
this thing in and charged it for like first of all don't believe that battery bullshit all right so
this is i'm glad i thought of this because the battery will last whatever they say months if you
disconnect it after every use from the belt if you've got it plugged into the belt it seems like
it's drawing current because i charged mine overnight when i first got it then i put it in the belt and i made sure that the belt was going to work
then i sat the belt on my desk well today i went to put it on to to sync up my my mz60 watch
and and it's not working and i'm getting pissed the fuck off trying i'm typing back and forth
the chis like taylor of course is having his own issues he's typing in these people are this is
bullshit these things suck and i'm just and i'm about to be like yeah fuck them let's
find a competitor but like then i was like maybe it died on me somehow so i came in here and plugged
it up and charged it for two hours and it worked it fucking worked after that everything linked up
so so like charge the thing every night i guess just to be careful
because you don't want to lose a workout um i think during your workout it might tell you the
battery percentage yeah i saw that too yeah it does but i don't believe that i don't know okay
i don't like bluetooth devices that where where both ends don't have digital displays
like like i i i don't like that at all it can be so frustrating
um the old gopro cameras were infuriating so infuriating like you know you're about to like
my case i'm about to like blow something up that costs twelve hundred dollars and of course it's
gonna get blown up when it's over and either i go back to atlanta and buy eight more mannequins
and a bunch more costumes or this fucking camera is on.
And it's just like, I can't trust it.
I can't trust it.
I'm just going to go buy a $1,500 fucking like handy cam and use it for this because I cannot trust a goddamn GoPro because I never know if they're running.
In my world, we use these intercoms to talk to each other.
And oh my gosh, you're trying to sync up two Bluetooth devices.
There's no phone.
Using like blinking lights,
like a red one, a blue one,
and then they blink together and they turn purple.
And I'm supposed to interpret
like blinking purple error messages and shit.
It's, ah, Bluetooth can be so infuriating.
Or with these things,
like sometimes you've got to count audible beeps.
And it's like,
it's like three beeps means it's off. Four means danger mode yeah and it's like they go it's like three
beeps means it's off four means danger mode it's like and i'm like
it's the dirty lucky punk means it's overheating be sure to put it in a in a dry area outside
away from burnable opt what was that three four five like jesus christ is it about
to explode on me or is it not working or is it broken or is it sink now and i'm ready to exercise
no clue dude that's really funny i noticed that too with the beeping thing like i didn't get how
it worked so like when i put it on the first time i was just like all
right it says it'll beep and i started walking around and it didn't do it i had to like lick my
thumb and like put yeah spit on the back of it and then like three minutes after that it turned on
i had the same experience and you know when i go downstairs in the morning my dog is crazy excited
i know i've goofed about this but i like, I bet his pulse is like 130 right now.
But it doesn't work on me without licking it or sweating.
So there's no way it's going to work on a furry dog.
Yeah, I had the same thought as well.
And of course, my...
Oh, if fur impedes it, I'm at another disadvantage.
Oh, that'd be so funny if you had to shave like part of it.
Just to get a ring.
I have to make a square here of just no hair.
That's hilarious.
Oh, please post it on Instagram if you have to do that.
I'll make it, like, way too big.
Like, right up to the nip area.
Be right next to your egg breakfast.
When I was, like, 16 or 17 or something, I was like, man, this chest is getting a little too hairy for my liking.
And, like, all the nipple hair, I was like, man, this chest is getting a little too hairy for my liking.
And like all the nipple hair, I was like, I'm going to shave around the nipple hair.
And then like I did that and like looked at myself.
I was like, all right, well, you've made an error.
Now you've got two nipples that live on Hair Island.
And it was just like two bright white nips. Just like right in a and oh that was thank god it wasn't like swimsuit season here's my tip if you're not happy with your chest
hair maybe you're younger and you're still figuring this out you don't shave your chest
because then you get a stubble thing that i feel like is like you're really advertising that you
shaved a few days ago but you can take a beard trimmer to it,
just shorten all those hairs,
and it backs it off a notch.
That'll work.
Yeah.
I don't have enough that that would even be an issue.
It's just right down the middle,
and I get hair on my nipples,
which I don't care for because I don't have the full chest thing Taylor has.
I shave my nipples.
Okay.
And can I play this out there?
If you're a lady, and you have hairy nipples, Okay. Can I play this out there?
If you're a lady and you have hairy nipples,
I want to embarrass you.
Shave those.
Pluck them, maybe.
How hairy is a woman's nipple?
Hairy enough that, you know...
Is it like a mole where there's
three long ones coming out of nowhere?
No, around the nipple.
Not growing straight out of the nipple nipple, but, you know, the areola.
It's got hair around it.
So I don't know any women with hairy nipples, but I heard about it in high school, so I know it's a thing.
Because high school kids wouldn't lie about girls' parts.
Definitely not.
So, yeah.
And they were like, yeah, I ever have that hair around?
I'm like, no, I don't really know about this.
I've never been with anyone who did that.
They were like, yeah, ever have that hair around?
I'm like, no, I don't really know about this.
I've never been with anyone who did that.
So it's almost, I guess it makes sense to be like a guy entering puberty kind of thing,
like early puberty, little circle of more than peach fuzz.
Yeah, shave that.
Yeah, you want to shave. What's the hairiest nipple on a lady you ever encountered?
I've only seen, I only know of one.
I've only seen it once.
Can I ask a question?
Did she have a really high sex drive? Because she's got a lot of testosterone in her was she
was she awesome in bed i i mean yes i'm hearing yes this makes perfect sense i knew it all along
you dated her don't you judge me it always comes back to this for you. What's wrong with you?
Science-minded. I'm science-minded, Kyle.
I'm telling you, if a woman has a lot of testosterone in her system, she's got
to be DTF.
And she's got that big clit that we all love.
Jimmy Kimmel said the same thing. I'm not alone
in this line of thinking.
Great minds. You and Jimmy Kimmel
on that island
but what uh what happened kyle like how hairy was it like what was the the what happened when
you removed the bra and you kind of oh well like what was your response i had no of course no i
ignored it you know i i i acted like there wasn't an issue at all did you bite him one with your
teeth like a teasing way well i didn't bite the hair
but but you know i was sucking on the nipple and licking it stuff and i was like oh there's there's
some hair here i don't care for this um you know it's not gonna impede me it's not gonna it's not
gonna gonna stop me but um i wish it weren't there have you ever had a showstopper with a girl
like i know you don't care for really big labias but i
don't think you would be like you know what now that i've seen it i'm headed to the door yeah no
i've never had a showstopper um no no definitely no my cousin has scott uh said that he was on the
couch with a girl and um i think he got his hands down her pants or maybe her pants were off and her and her pussy smelled terrible and and and uh and and he just got up and started getting
dressed and she's like what's the problem and he just he was like you know what the problem is
you know what the problem is like i don't want to catch whatever you have taylor have you ever
heard it like not heard of it have you ever heard of it? Not heard of it. Have you ever experienced that? Sneaky.
Something like that, where you just end it right there?
Well, just a girl who has some sort of thing going on, some sort of hygiene problem.
Nothing like Kyle
saying, to clear out a room or something.
No, I've never had...
I guess I've been lucky with that.
It's so overplayed. Most women do a good job
taking care of their vaginas so it doesn't smell.
Most women have good hygiene
in general. Most women have pretty good
hygiene for the most part.
I've never had a showstopper.
I should have made something up. Damn it.
Maybe the next week I'll fuck
someone gross and come back.
Who knows?
The sky's the limit.
That's funny.
Man, this fitness thing.
We'll see.
We'll see.
I know what 247 feels like.
I'm half tempted tomorrow to bust out like a 350.
Is that what I need to maintain?
It's 350 times 30.
No, 300 would get you to 9,000 over over the month 350 would get me to 10 5 yeah but if joe rogan's peeing out muscle mass getting to 11 2 i think us getting to 10 5
might not be i think achievable rogan did these super intense shorter workouts and i don't know
that that's the strategy was he doing like he does like uh
running a lot too what is he used a rowing machine he did elliptical he did uh bike he ran uh he ran
hills um he did everything he would kick the back he described what his workouts and it was
something like there was definitely kicking the bag for 45 minutes i remember that um and uh and like rowing for an hour or two or maybe the maybe the elliptical for an hour or
two like stuff like that like really like mixing it up he said he gets like you know stir crazier
like it becomes monotonous this is in all caps break yourself do it waste your bones and muscles away. All caps bold. This is war.
I know the strategy.
He did everything.
I'm excited for day four.
When Chiz was earlier saying,
he's like the rowing machine works nine muscle groups,
nothing better.
And I'm like,
do you know how fucking sore all nine of those muscles?
Taylor?
I've thought about this.
I'm considering that you might be wrong.
Maybe.
Let me exaggerate the other side of the argument to make it clear.
If you tried to win this entire competition with just your quads, you'd kill them, right?
And it's a pulse measuring thing.
It's a whole body exercise.
On the other hand, you could casually work every muscle in the body and get a little
further maybe maybe yeah i just like chis is saying like oh i won't care i'll just push through it
it's like well like that's the difference between running like running you can more easily take a
break and go back to it or biking or uh elliptical whereas with like that like you will hit muscle
exhaustion yeah i think chis i don't i don't know chis's athletic career but i'm assuming it's not elite and he's like i
know the strategy he did everything you act like i give a fuck there's literally nothing better for
working out your entire body than rowing for cardio and strength and i'm like man like this
mind over matter thing doesn't last a month.
You don't just push yourself through a month worth of rowing. You can't do that.
It lasts for a minute and a half.
That's how long you do that.
As long as everybody gets fitter.
That's what's going to happen.
Junior varsity in high school.
As long as everybody gets fitter.
That's what's going to happen.
Junior varsity in high school.
Well,
Case closed!
Thank you.
I was searching for the words.
I'll back down then.
I played a lot of sports.
In that case,
I was unaware of your sports acumen.
Frankly, I want out.
I was misled.
I had no idea that you were a junior varsity athlete.
At the high school level.
You, sir.
This is the equivalent of Taylor telling me
that now he's got an African
runner living in his home inexplicably.
Oh, and by the way, I got 800
meps today. It's coming
off a little fishy to me that you didn't
reveal this
sports acumen that you
had prior to right at this moment.
This is
not fair. We have no idea.
Yeah. We can't compete.
I didn't play JV
soccer in high school.
This is never at my peak was I junior varsity. I've't play JV soccer in high school. This is never at my
peak was I junior varsity.
I've never been JV at all.
I mean, that was only a decade ago.
That muscle memory is fresh.
Muscle memory is
fresh.
And I bet you're living the same style of life
that you did back then.
Yeah.
I feel misled. I feel lied to. Yeah. I feel misled.
I feel lied to.
Yeah.
You know, I feel deceived.
You should have to pay twice as much money if you win Chiz.
I think that we have to handicap ourselves
to keep up with Chiz at this point.
I think that every...
I think today should count.
Every 100 maps we earn,
we get like five freebies or something like that
just to me just to i need a five percent advantage just to be able to keep up it that will be so so
sad laughing my ass off you should really you should feel really awful if any of you lose to
me kyle has adderall careful he's gonna cheat um that's absurd first of all i don't have adderall
i'm all out my prescriptions out i don't have any no adderall don't have any absurd first of all i don't have adderall i'm all out my prescriptions out i
don't have any no adderall don't have any and second of all the very idea of like using
meth or amphetamines to artificially raise my heart rate for a month
dude you would feel so terrible you do one row and you'd be beaten out of your chest i could
literally like die from doing that.
Oh, hell yeah.
Look, if there were
$100,000 on the line or a million
dollars on the line on this competition
or something like that, then maybe in that case
you're like, yeah, I have to find a way to keep
my heart rate at 100 beats per minute while I
sleep just so I can keep up.
But no.
We're going to have to eat a spicy chip
or something like that. It's not that big of a deal.
Yeah, that chip's going to suck.
Dude.
I don't know.
I'm kind of looking for...
I'm anxious. I have a lot of anxiety
about this upcoming competition.
Which, if nothing else, says that
I'm in it.
If nothing else, I'm going to lose some weight and look better naked than I did at the beginning of the month.
So I'm pretty fine with that.
What you're not going to see from me is these boys all getting like 10,000 meps at the end of the month.
And I fucked off and got 900.
Yeah.
All of us are going to try.
I guarantee that.
Yeah, man.
It's going to be great.
I'm hoping some of you don't.
I was really hoping at least one of you was like, you know what?
Ten days in, I changed my mind mind i don't care about this competition i'm gonna do i'm gonna tweet tons of pictures of myself eating pizza and like candy or cake shakes
and i'm gonna tweet them at you all month chiz now they'll all be like photos that are set up
i'm not actually eating this you can eat it ohgan oh yeah i can eat it yeah rogan i'm not gonna gain weight i feel that's the that would
be the biggest losing thing imaginable in my mind is gaining weight on this like that's even worse
than having to eat a hot chip uh yeah that is worse than eating a hot chip i would eat a hot
chip if you told me it caught it burned three pounds if a hot chip burned three pounds i'd eat one daily for the next like five days and be so
happy well and then you would go you then you just be a food fiend and be like i do whatever i want
i got plenty of hot chips you know what would be great he died yeah like as much as we we fuck
around about him if wings were part of this competition, it'd be wonderful, right?
That'd be hilarious.
He'd be our Bert.
He'd be the one trying to find
some way to stay at one
mep a minute
for an extended period of time some way and
cheese it out.
He said he walked 6,000 steps a day
and that was his cardio.
There's no way.
You don't think so? 6,000 steps a day and that was his cardio. There's no way. You don't think so?
6,000 isn't really that much.
That's a couple miles.
There's no way he's doing that.
I walked 8,000 steps a day and I napped all afternoon.
Yeah, you had a very active day. Until like 1 p.m.
Dude, I napped in the afternoon.
For like basic bitch 59-year-old moms, they're like, here's your Fitbit.
The goal is 10,000 a day.
That's just the default set one.
He's got a Fitbit.
I challenge him.
Call him out on it.
Fucking post your Fitbit every day for a week.
Show me 6,000 steps a day, and I'll fucking do something.
Eat an even hotter chip.
Oh, you eat a hotter chip.
do something.
Eat an even hotter chip.
Everything that's at stake for PKF now has to be chip related.
It's all spicy chips.
There's no way. I don't believe it.
There's no way.
My step count is kind of embarrassing.
Oh, but it's a little...
I average 7,189
a day. You probably can't read that.
But that sucks.
Yeah, a lot of steps.
You guys want to call it a wrap?
I should be better.
Yeah, we reached the stop.
Yeah, we reached it a while ago. I was just enjoying the show.
Yeah, man, we had fun here tonight.
I really enjoyed Hector as a guest.
Had a good time.
I'm excited about this competition. It's going to be very fun
competing with you all.
It'll be a lively, wonderful competition.
And no matter who loses, even the loser is going to be fitter, better cardio, better looking.
It's good.
It's great.
Excited about it.
Unless the loser's a quitter.
If someone's a quitter, that needs to be remembered.
And it better not be me.
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Is that both? That's it.
Painkiller R80 4.11.
The pre-My Zone
episode.