Painkiller Already - PKA 535 w Arian Foster - Kyle's Casino Trip, Woody's Motorcycle Adventure, Tom Brady not GOAT
Episode Date: March 23, 2021...
Transcript
Discussion (0)
pka you'll have your button 535 with our guest arian foster taylor this episode of pka is brought
to you by express vpn and blue chew a couple of awesome sponsors but for now arian you're not in
your awesome setup you're remote where are you if that's i'm in new york city man now i'm in new
york i'm in gotham nice i'm chilling man I like how you just totally went to regular talking to commercial voice real fast, man.
That's impressive.
Oh, thank you.
Did we do that?
What are you doing in New York?
Big pro.
Honestly, I've been quarantining for real because my mom was hella scared and she wanted
to come visit for the holidays.
So I've been just really not doing anything and chilling and um she left recently and i was like
i gotta get out and so i just needed to leave and i picked new york huh why any reason for new york
i love new york man um it's the i can't like live here but like the vibe of the city is so dope it's
just like hella busy and everybody's mad and the food is good.
And so I appreciate that vibe for spurts.
How long have you been there now?
Like most of the quarantines?
I landed like four days ago.
So I'm staying here for another like five days.
So how long did you quarantine for real?
Pretty much the whole time.
So like over a year yeah man i was really at
the crib uh like i saw people like but they couldn't come over unless they got a test because
like i don't that's the one thing i don't play if it was just me like i'm pretty sure i could just
i'll beat it because you know i'm pretty you're healthy yeah my mother my mother is like super
paranoid about it and um she wanted to visit so I was chilling. And plus my daughter, she had some respiratory issues when we were at the beginning of the year, actually.
And I just didn't want to play with that either before all the information came out about what this virus really was.
And so I was really chilling.
I didn't really do much.
Dude.
Yeah.
I don't want to talk about me.
I share a lot of this experience.
Not so much old.
We've got a baby in our life. We who we watch she's not our baby and then uh the mom is having another
baby so there's like a pregnant woman and they can't get vaccinated right now i think and you
know who just knows i don't know like it just like you if it was me i'd be out there i don't know
doing whatever the heck i wanted to i would still be responsible if it was me i'd be out there i don't know doing whatever the heck
i wanted to i would still be responsible but it's just i would probably take a little bit more risk
i still mask up and everything but i just uh yeah i don't i'm not a virologist so like i just listen
to what the experts say and whatever happens happens with you i wish i was from a redder state
because it's not real there
a redder state because it's not real there no people still get it come to texas man it's crazy um but yeah no i'll uh we'll circle back to that i want to take
off of you so you've been home quarantining you have a good uh
a good have you picked up any new hobbies lots of people are like starting up
new random hobbies like anything nothing that i've not nothing that i've like really never done
before like um i got a little bit more uh focused on my guitar practice so i started uh hammering
out the guitar a little bit more um start reading a lot more um a lot more time to read. I mean, as far as like currency,
like I've had a few investments that I had invested in
like about three or four years ago
that actually hit.
So fiscally,
it's been a good quarantine for me.
That's nice.
Unfortunately, but yeah.
That's great.
What are you reading?
They're econ books,
kind of like the...
Nonfiction econ books. Yeah. like non-fiction econ books yeah
yeah it is boring man i don't want any book recommendations keep that nonsense to yourself
well i think as we as we get older man you start to pay attention a little bit more to politics
because you realize that's the kind of shit that kind of matters uh the way our lives are governed
and so it's just that kind of shit intrigues me um i'm always i'm always kind of shit that kind of matters uh the way our lives are governed and so it's just that kind of
shit intrigues me um i'm always i'm always kind of keeping abreast of like science and stuff what's
going on in that world so it's kind of your current thing you're like kind of on an econ
kick and then you'll bounce to something else and yeah yeah once i fully understand it you know
once you fully understand economy is like fully understanding space or something like
that's like that's my fantasy is like huh if i were a retired millionaire i'd still do things
like learning but i guarantee i open like i'm a retired millionaire in my 30s and i open up a book
and it's like showing an equation i'm like this is absolutely not like no i'm too rich i got those moments where i'm like what the fuck am i doing
but like i think i think that's actually it's a really interesting dynamic right because like you
you would think like i i got money my family said i could just do whatever i want but like what you
end up saying is like you you end up digging into yourself like if and that's why i think people get
really like depressed in my position is they
don't, it's hard for them to kind of like dig into themselves. And, um, uh,
that that's, I guess that's been my gift and my curse is I've been able to like
stay interested in other people's fields and, and see how that applies to me.
Yeah. That's good. Is, I mean, I'm everybody,
whether you're a professional athlete or not,
you always imagine what you're going to be doing when you're retired. Is your retired life pretty similar to what you anticipated or totally? Because I can imagine when you're working your ass off in the NFL, part of you is like, when I'm retired, I'm doing absolutely nothing. I'm just going to chill forever.
I was so,
I had some like intense tunnel vision while I was working that, you know,
you had fleeting thoughts of retirement.
You didn't really ever think it was going to come.
And I think,
uh,
when it finally hit,
I did have that probably like,
like six months where I didn't do shit.
I didn't get off the couch.
I watched,
I binge watched game of Thrones,
like literally like,
I think it took me like three weeks and I just watched every single season,
every episode.
Um,
you know,
I have those,
those fleeting moments where I do nothing.
But after a while, it's like, what am I doing with my life?
Like, it's a really eerie feeling when you're just like, what do I do?
There's nobody to tell me no.
There's no one to tell me no.
I'm just out here, man.
So it takes a lot of discipline.
Like right now, I'm in the best shape i have been since um since i played but uh because i just you
feel as an athlete especially i'm really aware of my body and like you start to feel like the food
you eating and the shit you drink you start to feel it like you know the way you breathe the way
you move like it starts to feel so like these, month, I've kind of been locking in.
I feel really good, man.
I'll show you my abs, but I don't think anyone's going to see them.
I mean, Woody sends pictures of his abs all the time.
I'm not even joking.
Woody got abs, man.
You got abs, Woody.
Come on.
I do.
Oh, he does.
He does.
Yeah.
No, I am.
He's down 25 pounds.
He's shredded.
See, Woody, it's not bragging because I'm doing it for you.
uh no i am 25 pounds he's shredded um see woody it's not bragging because i'm doing it for you in as far as 48 year olds go woody is in the top 0.01 you're the warren buffett
warren buffett a 48 year old ass it's just like three movements to get there
but that's okay yeah i um people have heard this before it started with i got braces back in october i'm
making teeth gains and uh that's always wild to me so i now that all the folks get braces that's
always wild it's so because my my man my man's got braces when he was like 30 and i just i flamed
him every day i know i don't want i'm happy for you though it's hella jokes you're gonna get so
now they're invisalign braces right so you don't see him i I'm happy for you, though. It's hella jokes you're going to get. So now they're Invisalign braces, right?
So you don't see them.
I take them out for the show.
Like, no one online is – well, I stream with them on.
People didn't notice.
But they're so – they're not in – they're right here.
These are my braces.
I believe you, man.
Okay.
Anyway, with those –
How do we know those are yours?
Put them on.
Then snacking became this big ordeal.
You have to brush them every time you take them in and out.
So if you want like, I don't know, even like a couple of almonds.
Now you have like 10 minutes of chores to do.
You have to take the braces out, eat the almonds, brush your braces, brush your teeth, put them back in.
It's like a
fucking thing. And it just creates a real sort of like consciousness to everything you eat. So with
that, I lost like, I don't know, eight or 12 pounds, something like that. And then that little
bit of success bred a little more interest and a little more success. And I started hitting the gym
and I started lifting weights and now I'd like ever miss a day. Life didn't cheat in her.
I never leave the house. She doesn't, she knows where I am all the time.
It started with braces, I swear.
And so anyway, yeah, I've just been, oh, and I, I track everything I eat on,
you know, with this, you know, the online tools, chronometer. And I don't know,
I guess just the fact that it's
working is encouraging so it makes me do it more and then that works and it just sort of
files but confidence man it's a it's a it's contagious yeah feeds into itself you got a
lot of momentum now so are you doing a lot of cardio or still weight training like when you're
when you were in the nfl or you know what are you doing to stay fit yeah i don't do uh anywhere near what i used to do but
i do i do things now just kind of stay fit i do beach body workouts now i just i want to stay fit
um i won't i won't run too much like if i jog it's not intense uh i probably won't ever sprint again
uh but um yeah just beach body stuff man just
high high reps so you don't need to be fit you just need to look fit
well you will be fit if you look fit you'll be a kind of fit right right like i'm not trying to
win anything anymore so now it's just if i feel good now i kind of work out like like sometimes
i'll do when i'm doing abs right i'll do it until it burns rather than
counting reps like it just it feels good you gotta get engaged on your body and how it feels
yeah i my goal is not to be fit it's to look like someone who is fit like if i took my shirt off
you'd be like it actually better than i thought but if you tried to catch me you would totally
catch me better than you thought
yeah but that's the thing though is like when you start training like that right because like i'll
do like high reps and low weight right so i started like when i started i was like 185 right
i just like pumping out 185 it's not a lot of weight um well in comparison to what what i did
what i did what i was used to it's just like really light right and um what you what you
notice though it starts to not be enough and so you just add a little bit more over the course.
And today I just I did a workout and all of a sudden I was doing 265.
And I'm like, damn, what exercise is this?
This is a bench. OK.
And so usually I'm just like pumping just to get big.
But like I look up and I'm doing 265 and it's like, OK, it'll come because you have.
Well, this is this is kind of known in the workout world.
It's like you have some called muscle memory. So your muscles like they know where they've been and so
they they get back pretty fast good for you bro very cool yeah i i feel like uh coming out of
quarantine like there's a bunch of guys who have like just been hitting the gym and and you know
getting into that part of it maybe with their extra time from not commuting. Who knows?
And then a bunch of guys who've just been living that... What was that freaking Pixar movie
where they lived on a cruise ship?
WALL-E.
WALL-E, yes.
There's a bunch of other guys who went full WALL-E on it
and just drank their sugar drinks.
I was there for a minute, man.
Yeah, me too.
That's when I started.
I was like, you know what happens?
You reach over to the bathroom and you reach over to wipe your business.
Yeah.
And I felt a crease and I was like, oh, hell no.
No, I can't do that.
You're supposed to have a crease back there.
Wait, wait.
I'm confused.
Everyone has a butt crack.
Are you saying your belly or something else?
The side.
The side crease right here.
I went like that and it folded over and I was like oh no we ain't so that is a normal state for me and i've
noticed the lack of it because like in with good posture even at my heaviest i didn't have like a
big belly that i never had a pot belly or anything but with bad posture slouched over there's a mass there now there's not and i'm just like oh
wow like this is a whole new thing
it's like you feel better though like you really like mental clarity is a real thing and
like you said the confidence should start and it starts to like
leak into everything that you do like it's it's really interesting
yeah so anyway i try not to make it
i mean oh you said um did you have to buy uh did you have to buy a whole new wardrobe what do you
like like the little thing like the ancillary things like underwear did did you get to the
point where like large size i don't know what size underwear you wear i assume you wear large
but like do you like medium underwear my weight fluctuates so much over the years like if you
walked into my closet if someone broke into my home they'd think that four people lived
you just see like man there's a huge variety here down to 32s it's like a goldilocks system
i have a lot of clothes that don't look right on me now like i'm kind of swimming in them
and uh it's so when when
you get smaller they don't fit at all but they're just too big and my jeans like it looks like i'm
borrowing someone else's pants they're all folded up in front i have to wear a belt i mean i mentioned
before like i i have a pair of jeans i don't unbutton them or anything i just put them on like
sweatpants um but uh yeah so i've just been like trickling in new clothes that
fit better see that's why i don't i don't even have jeans i don't i threw out my jeans before
like yeah about six years ago i don't i just threw out jeans i just all sweats like it's just
jeans aren't comfortable dog like they oh i love them they so stiff fam it's like like you ever
have like a late night where you like you in your clothes a long time and it's like
it's just it's starting to stick on you and stuff and so like back then
i was like i can't why am i wearing jeans though i don't like these and so just sweats two thoughts
one i bet arian has superhuman thighs so jeans might fit differently on him than other people
yeah yeah it's true and uh two i kind of agree my problem with non-jeans is sometimes I'm making a statement I'm not trying to make.
Like, oh, these look like dress pants kind of.
Oh, but they're card hearts.
So that material is a little thicker.
So now they're work pants.
Am I supposed to be drywalling or can I take these to a restaurant?
I get confused with non-jeans sometimes.
Maybe that's just me.
I think those days are going away those
days of like you're not dressed like you're like it's appropriate i think those days are slowly
going away because it's like i've been in business meetings with like dudes worth like 600 million
dollars and they got sweats and flip-flops on it's like those days are slowly like and i'm
almost like they're at that level of rich where that's the outfit yeah i'm so eccentric
jam of pants and you know if you're worth a million put a tie on if you're warren buffett
you can come naked i won't say a hundred percent i think we all was naked too we all just pretend
like like dressing up is like proper like what the fuck makes it proper why is a tie proper this
shit is stupid it's annoying i hate it it clothes the worst shit in the world so i don't
have them anymore because i don't i got i mean not to brag but i got enough money to be like
if you don't want to do business with me because i'm wearing sweats then it's all good yeah
i will not put a fucking tie on yeah and i'm even like it's not fair also because as a guy, the tie, the shirt, the jacket, the dress pants, it's uncomfortable.
You're binded down.
Like, I don't mind wearing the jeans.
I like jeans.
But like the jacket, you can't move very well.
You feel constricted.
I'm a sweater.
I don't like that.
And then like it'll be like a woman is like, oh, I can wear this like super light thing.
Looks comfy.
You're right about a lot of these things.
However, let's say you wanted to go to a wedding and you're going to see people you don't see all the time.
You want to look like the best version of you.
Girls, there's not much hiding in there.
They're wearing something thin.
If they have a muffin top, the world is going to see their new muffin top.
Welcome to the show.
If you're a dude, guys look great
in suits.
Almost every body type is flattered
by a suit.
I'm not going to wear it, but they look good.
I disagree on this whole thing.
The best part of me
having to go back and forth to court
was I got to buy a couple
of nice suits.
I was just like,
this is sitting all bad.
I got a tailored suit on,
you know? Yeah.
Yeah.
You should have prefaced it with that. You still got some people still got to wear suits.
If you're in court, put a suit on, man.
Yeah.
Pity all they had were clown shoes.
You just look at it.
If you don't stick with me, I just want to be comfortable.
Yeah, Kyle, if you showed up in sweats, you'd still be in there.
Yeah, I'm not glad
Aaron co-signs that one.
He's like, I like to be comfortable, but
that involves being free.
Exactly.
They're going to give you sweats in jail, so you don't wear pants.
They do give you sweat in jail.
I've still got my jail sweats.
Do you really?
Are they closed?
Yeah, I kept them.
They're super comfy.
I bet.
I don't know that I'm torn on keeping jail sweats.
Did you order any?
Because you ordered all that chili.
Order any prison pants?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. So you either wear these Carhartt-style green pants all the time with a belt.
And it's not like a regular belt.
It's like a canvas-type belt.
Or you order some sweatpants and some hoodies and shit.
And that's what I did.
I was like, yeah, I want some.
Because you're just chilling all day.
What most people wear.
What was popular. exactly what i wore like so most people like sweatpants
and what about your first yeah yeah like sweat like on orange is the new black well i think
they wear different clothes until their clothes come in how does that work
you're yeah it was green is the new black until your new shit came in okay so when you see someone in green
yeah your video's not moving but your audio seems okay when you see someone in green are you like
this guy's a noob he doesn't know what's up that or he just doesn't give a fuck
oh that's even badass or he's got a job oh Oh. You never had a job, right? You intentionally tried not to?
Yeah, I hid out.
You could have been in the kitchen, just like in Oz, getting fucked up.
The kitchen is the desired job.
I know, I watched Oz.
Yeah?
That's where I learned all about it.
Is it because you can sneak food, or is it just the hierarchy?
It pays well. That's where I learned all about it. Is it because you can sneak food or is it just the hierarchy?
It pays well.
If you're doing breakfast, you get it out of the way super early in the day and your job's done.
And you get access to not just the food that gets served, but the ingredients that go in.
So if you want a fucking onion to make something later on in the day or some pickles or some shit like that's the only way to get it just find a friend in the kitchen and have him pilfer an onion for you
yeah huh something yeah that sucks prison sucks man
i heard you buy the seasonings all day, man. Let me highlight you right quick.
Aaron, you were saying people in your position get depressed.
And I painted something in my own mind onto that.
I don't know if it's true.
So this is what it is.
Are they depressed because they have time they don't know what to do with?
Or is it because life seems to have less meaning without the big lights.
I feel like it's parallel to what a soldier might have.
You're in the fire.
There's an adrenaline and a peak there that's higher than most people ever peak,
like a soldier or a pro athlete.
And then you come out of that and you're like, I'm just a dude?
It used to be there were so many consequences around all my actions and now there's none what's the point is that what it is that down i think people experience both of those or maybe
one that they're not like mutually exclusive so like for me that wasn't it because i didn't really
like the line like i wasn't into the fame i actually hated it um uh i think more than anything, it's and I'm not a religious person, but I think with people's work, it gives them a sort of purpose.
And without that, I mean, every facet of our society is is is derived from obtaining a goal.
And usually that goal is job oriented. It's to get this. And so I could provide
it. It's to reach this peak. And then once I reached this, you know what I'm saying? But
once you get there, you realize there is no there. You realize that it was all kind of a facade.
I think that's a heavy thought to like try to deal with. It's really,
it's like shattering, like it shatters your world because
it's like, but damn, what do I do? And some people deal with it like, well, what am I worth?
A lot of people tie their worth to their work, which is dangerous. It's not just a sports thing.
That's just a people thing. A lot of people lose their jobs and get really depressed.
And I think that you have to have, I mean it's gonna get in a class conversation but you have to have
um like reverence for yourself outside of your work because if you don't that's what can happen
you you're who you are cannot be contingent on what you do and i think a lot of cats go through
that is like damn
i'm pretty sure there's an aspect of people people like to be famous people like the fame people like
that uh notoriety of like when you walk in and like hey that's so-and-so um when that kind of
starts to fade and and people start calling you washed and like it's an ego shot like straight
to your ego and um uh that's why i always always and i guess just the luck the draw. I always kind of disassociated myself from playing football.
I hated being known as a football player because I was like, oh, that's not who I am.
And when I was finished with it, all that rhetoric came at me.
And luckily it didn't bother me because I was like, you're right.
A hundred percent. But you're you're washed. I'm like, hopefully you can be washed one day because it's amazing.
But most but I want to say most,
but a lot of people in that position can't.
And so what they end up doing is they,
they try to scratch that itch through other things. And some people,
it's vices, some people's alcohol, drugs, or a lot,
a lot of cats like to stay around the game.
They're going to coaching or they're going to like broadcasting and stuff
like that. Yeah. But it's a real,
it's a real thing that needs to be addressed and probably not addressed
enough by like the NFL PApa and the nfl in general no you zero percent of you wanted
to stay involved as like a coach or you know on that side right hell no i got i got offered jobs
do you ever do any like when i do any broadcasting no like the draft day stuff yeah no they they've
asked me before like they don't ask me anymore but they asked me like to be like an analyst and stuff like i'm just not interested like i don't think i care enough
i'll be i'd kill it but i got yeah i just don't think i care enough about the game like
one of the main reasons i retired i was sitting on the sidelines we were playing the cleveland
browns and i was looking up in the stands and i was like, yo, I don't give a fuck who wins this game. I couldn't care less who wins this game.
And that's when I
knew that moment. I was like, yo, it's time
to get out.
Fuck who wins this game.
I just didn't care.
What I look like afterwards sitting here talking about,
man, if they rush the ball
more, I don't care.
If I'm not into it, I don't
need to be there. Just not for my sake, but just like for everybody around people who really care about that shit
people who want that position and i'm just up there for a check like it wouldn't be i'm sure
you never said anything out loud like that but is that a more common thought among professional
athletes at least in your experience than like a viewer like us might think because i'm sure
there are a lot of them who are like who fucking cares about my stat line this is a job i think so um i think as you know as men with testosterone like a lot of times
that gets the better of you and you're like no he ain't gonna get the best of me like that kind of
comes into play but i think the overall consensus the majority of cats who who who got their money
and and and you know they play for the love of the game,
but at the end of the day,
they're out there to feed their family.
That's what they do.
That's what they do.
Wake up every day,
and then some people go to cubicles.
We ran between lines.
That was it for me.
You care to a certain extent because my salary
and my brother's salary next to me,
it's kind of like we play off of each other.
Like if he does better,
I do better.
And then we are here sweating and bleeding with each other.
And if there's a camaraderie that comes with it.
And so that aspect absolutely has a,
has is a variable.
But for the most part,
personally,
I was just like,
once you realize you don't,
you don't really have like,
this is one of the,
one of my best games of my life was when we played Washington Redskins 2014.
And if you look at the stat line, I think I had like one hundred and three yards. Right.
So it's a blip on the radar of like my big stat games or like if you're a fan of me and in Houston and what I did there, you're like that game.
Why? I ran the best I could. Like and that was I did things that I was impressed with, and it was my best game.
But it wasn't completely up to me.
I didn't have control over how good I did.
There's so many other people involved.
Not only that, the front office, they hire who they want to hire.
They put on a team who they want to put on a team.
And so you don't have any control or say, so what's actually going on.
So you just control this little space in this big game.
And once that kind of sinks in,
you're like,
I,
you got to disassociate yourself with the outcome of the game.
Cause like,
I don't have that much basketball is a little different because like,
if I'm LeBron James,
I can literally carry a team to the championship.
It's a little different,
but like if you're a running back, if your five guys up front ain't blocking,
you're having a bad game.
It just is what it is.
Do you think your retirement went better because you retired on purpose?
A lot of people leave the NFL because they got cut.
Yeah.
That's emotionally tougher, right?
You've been deemed not good enough yeah um there
was no ego shot to me when it was like i'm i'm leaving because i want to it's like i took control
of my fate and my destiny not everybody has that luxury because it is a luxury a lot of cats fight
and scratch and try to stay in the league or or or try to hang on and stuff like that but i knew i
knew when it was time.
My dad told me when I was young.
He was like – I was like, how do I know –
this was like a high school math conversation.
I was like, how do I know when I'm ready to walk away?
He's like, you'll know.
You'll just know.
And the moment it hit me, I was like, I'm done.
I don't have anything.
As soon as it hit you, sitting there against the Browns going,
I just don't care.
Yeah.
It was a really freeing feeling, though, man.
I mean, and I remember I went to the coach.
It was midseason.
I retired midseason.
And he was like, are you sure?
I'm like, I'm positive, man.
He's like, take a couple days.
Think about it.
Come back.
And if you still feel the same, it's all good.
So I took those couple days.
I was in Miami at the time.
So there was like this little waterway. That's like a big boating city so they have this like
this little waterway and i i took like a whole bunch of cruises up there and i was sitting there
having some drinks and i was like oh yeah definitely definitely so i sampled not working
and i found it way better than working who'd to thunk?
Nobody's going to tackle me. I can do what I want.
This doesn't hurt at all.
What are these umbrella drinks called?
That's another thing that's real big. My brother,
because he was my personal trainer,
the other day, like I said, I started getting back into workout.
He's working me out.
He puts down this little foam pad
and a little roller. Usually, you warm up before you work out. He puts it down. He's like, okay, warm up a little this little foam pad and a little roller and usually you warm
up before you work he puts it down he's like okay warm up a little bit i'm like no and he's like
what i'm like no just what do i got and he's like oh he's a warm up bro i'm like no i'm not for what
if something pops up so it goes it goes i don't care nothing nobody's no what do i got and he's like all right man and so i don't warm up anymore i
get just suffering no i will not this is the hill i will die on i'm curious about that i know you
said it pretty clearly but do you literally you you must do light sets before heavy sets or
something there's some level of warm yeah i don't hop into 265 no no no right right that's just not smart no i like so how i work out is is i work out in intervals right it's
gonna be boring for somebody who don't uh work out but i work out at intervals and to me um it's the
best way to work out when you're in a weight room because it it knocks out two birds with one stone
you do cardio plus you get your weights in right so let's let's say, like today I did, I'll do bench, I'll do curls,
I'll do, like, presses, and I'll do, like, I don't know, another exercise.
So I'll do four of those.
So I'll go from bench to boom to boom to boom, and I'll start all over.
And I'll do four sets of those.
And when you do that, like, you increase your weight incrementally as you go up.
And I found, like, if you do it, it helps helps with cardio so you're knocking out cardio while you're lifting it's it's better than just
going from one thing and the one thing and the one thing i'm not sold fuck i'm not doing cardio no
it's basically just a giant super i just i just gave out a gym too
y'all should pay me for that man my cash app is uh do you uh do you work out at home because I guess
most I don't know where it they're probably open in Texas the gyms right I
don't really I still don't stay around people too much so I have some
equipment at home when the quarantine was popping, for real,
I was at home a lot.
But now my brother knows this dude
who got a gym and we just sneak in there
at 6 a.m. when nobody's there
and knock it out before anybody comes
and then we head out.
Nice.
I want a friend with a gym.
I've seen you gave me a tour
of your gym. Why do you need a friend with a gym. I've seen you gave me a tour of your gym.
Why do you need a friend with a gym?
So you have two gyms?
Just to, you know, variety is the spice of life.
You have like, I don't want to, do you have 11 pieces of exercise equipment?
It's something like that.
Not that many.
I have a lot though.
I really, I went way too hard with building a home gym during quarantine because I was like,
I'm going to get into something stupid, guaranteed.
Like it may as well be working out a lot you know because otherwise i just would have spent like thousands
of dollars on magic cards or something like i guarantee you know and now that i've got other
lord of the rings cards they're lord of the rings getting infused into magic the gathering now i'm
like already setting aside budgets for that when that comes out i'm gonna buy a play set of
everything it's gonna be awesome what can that cost right like i'm familiar with cards they cost just a few pennies or cents you know like
well no no these are very expensive the most valuable card black lotus it's like an alpha
one i think that's like 30 or 40 thousand dollars or more right yeah is that low i thought it was
a quarter million maybe why am i telling you what a magic card costs?
I don't look up those expensive ones
because I don't play with those.
I just want the ones that are fun to play with.
I don't want a card so valuable
that it's like, don't touch that.
It's like, no, that's not fun.
30 racks.
Oh, you were right.
I was way wrong.
Yeah.
I think it's because it was like the first time
they started making cards in like 1989.
And it's like, of course, when you start making a card game, they don't know the fucking rules.
They don't know how it's going to evolve.
And so they just make all these cards that unintentionally are so overpowered.
You can't like they're unusable.
They had to ban them all.
But people still collect them.
A friend of mine who is very into that stuff.
He's like a level, whatever the highest level of magic judges that goes to events.
That's what he is. Really successful guy. What does a magic judge is that goes to events that's what he is really
successful guy what does a magic judge wear at events does he dress up as a wizard or as like
a football referee there's no way you can be the weirdest one there's no way but like he just loves
it he's like these are my people i love magic and like really successful guy goes around to these
things like for free volunteering just because he likes it so much and like when he started doing well for
himself he like most people be like i'm getting an awesome car i'm getting fucking this i'm getting
that he was like dude i just got it it's called like there's nine of those really really rare
expensive cards like power nine from like 1989 and he bought all of them so he has a set
of all of them for he got for like 52 000 or something and he just has that now and like for
him it's worth it because you know he just wants to have it forever it's like his prized possession
but i wouldn't do that i'd prefer a car or i just put it on my mortgage that's what i do
he didn't resell them though,
right?
Yeah.
Like if he wants his $52,000 and do they appreciate in value?
Because I've always been,
I think he bought the set of nine for 40 grand and now it's worth like 50 or
something.
See,
that's what I'm talking about.
Like,
like there's some hobbies that are like expensive and to some people seemingly
really dumb like that.
And it's like,
no,
you don't understand. These never go down in value. Like dumb like that and it's like no you don't understand these
never go down in value like i get it it's absurd to have fifty thousand dollars worth of like magic
cards but whenever i decide that's dumb and i like have a kid if that's your future yeah i'll
have sixty thousand dollars worth of magic cards all of a sudden that i can yeah i got college
tuition for my kid all four
years with with my fucking magic card collection but i didn't always be around i stopped collecting
cards in the seventh grade when i had like this little this little you know little card album or
whatever and i was like mad into pokemon cards like super super dope i had the holographic
charizard card i might have said it before but like it scar super dope. I had the holographic Charizard card.
I might have said it before, but like it scarred me.
But it was the holographic Charizard card.
And I was in like third period or something.
And I had left it under the seat.
Fourth period, I was like, damn, I left my cards.
I left class to go get it.
And she was gone.
And I was like fucking crushed, dog.
That's devastating.
Whoever stole that, I hope they get herpes.
What an asshole asshole because that was
and isn't that the one now i'm sure you know you were in seventh grade this is quite a while ago
that's the one that even now is worth a fuck ton like that rare foil charizard yes it's 700
700 jesus christ that's ariana's gonna be fine without the $700 card. It's the principle.
You can get one now.
Go to eBay.
Exactly.
You know what?
But no, it was like I had the whole collection, and that was like my...
You could get two whole collections.
Yeah, that was the crumb to the crumb.
No, I'm not into it no more.
I was into it though.
I used to play them shits, and I didn't ever play that one.
But it was like...
It's just...
When you work your ass off, it's just demoralizing. Yeah, and it's just it's when you when you when you work your ass off and you it's just demoralizing yeah and it's fun to like even more so than buying like the individual cards
which like if i'm building a magic deck i'm not stupid obviously i'm gonna buy the individual
cards not roll the dice on packs but like when you open a pack that like that's like eight bucks or
whatever and you get a 60 card in it like that's really cool it's like ah this is like a form of
gambling like that's why you get addicted to it as a kid because you're like this is so addictive i could just open
booster pack after booster pack oh man i'm now i want to order magic card but thank god there's
i really enjoyed that play with me like when we were in colorado and we went to walmart and like
bought all those booster packs or whatever like yeah i wasn't that into the game i just kind of
liked playing with you guys. Like,
I would never like get into it on my own. Like, like it was just kind of a cool thing to be doing
with everybody, but like opening it up and let me like, Oh, okay. This one's worth 0.0 cents.
Okay. Perfect. Perfect. That's, that's less than nothing. Oh, and this is worth $5. And it's like,
well, shit, that pays for the whole pack. It was, it was kind of cool. But of course, like,
when am I going to be selling these?
I'm sure everybody gets that in their head.
They're like, oh, I'm making money.
It's like, when?
When will you make that money?
When are you going to put this card up for sale somewhere and get your cash back?
The answer is never.
This is many years ago.
I haven't been in so long.
It's probably like 2015, last time I went to a Friday Night Magic.
But I remember way long ago, I went to one.
And often you'll see people, usually an older guy you know has big binders he's like i'm selling cards because that's where everybody is
and like almost invariably the first hundred pages of their binder are just things that they want you
to flip through so they can show off and then when you're like oh i'd love to get this they're like
oh can't part with those and you like look at the pack, and it's like,
you have 16 of them.
It's like, I can't get rid of it.
It's like, you can only have four in a deck, you fucking bitch.
Don't come here and tell a 13-year-old
that, you know, I can't purchase this.
You're an asshole.
You're hoarding.
You're bragging.
Hey, he's a hoarder.
Yeah, no, for sure.
And you're not even playing in the draft tournament.
You probably suck at the game, you old bitch. so like i understand the magic cards i understand the value
of them i understand why people like desire them what i cannot fucking wrap my head around is
baseball cards like i've been getting these pre-roll ads on youtube about this like i guess
he's like some sort of and yeah this guy's like some kind of investment
guru yeah this guy's i i got this pre-roll from this guy he's like some kind of an investment
guru and like he was the he like spent like i don't know i don't remember the exact figures
like 300 grand on some baseball card like two years ago and uh and like and like there's news
stories about what an idiot this guy is and like And now the thing's worth half a million or $600,000 or something like that.
And he's got like four of them.
And he's showing off the Ferrari he bought from selling these cards and shit like that.
And it's just like, who wants that fucking card?
Dude, some rich weirdo who's into collections, for sure.
I don't have any like nostalgic um possessions like that
like like all like any kind of accolade like a trophy or whatever i i've garnered over my career
like my mom has like i don't even have i don't have if you walked into my house you'd be like
you play football i don't got nothing the only things that i do have and they're in my closet
and i still have yet to hang them is like you know how they did um
jersey swaps after the game my jersey swap collection is is pretty dope though it's got i
got like at least about 20 hall of famers like it's pretty dope oh that's a cool thing to frame
and put up somewhere yeah i'm gonna do it they literally and literally game one so they still
like probably a little funky too they literally been in the bag for like three four years have you ever seen the espn uh
like 30 for 30 on bo jackson oh i don't see it but i mean i'm familiar with the story it's it's
it's real fucking good that's how he is at the end of it they go to his place i think he lives
in atlanta and he's like this is my trophy room and you look there's no football shit there's no
baseball shit it's deer heads it's deer heads because it's a hunter he's like these
are my trophies that's so funny i just looked up bo jackson the little like icon picture on like
the wikipedia it's not even him playing football it's him in like a hunting like an orange hunting
shirt like clearly yeah dude's an archer i didn't know oh he's bo hunt i'm sure that yeah yeah yeah
i mean he's a super athlete.
He can do anything he wants.
I tried fishing once.
I couldn't do it.
You didn't like fishing?
Too slow?
Or what didn't you like?
No, I'm soft, man.
Like, I caught a fish.
I was like 15.
I caught a fish.
And they put him in a bucket.
And I seen him.
He was like gasping for air.
And I was like, bro, I'm not
going to murder this fish.
I was like, what are you doing? I was like, I can't.
I can't do it. But you would have eaten it
if someone else murdered it for you.
For sure. Yeah.
You know what? I sound judgy, but I'm the same.
That's what it is.
The funnest part of fishing.
There's no point in fishing
if you can't eat it.
No, it's fun, fun man i enjoyed it like you know so you sit on the thing you got you know so you got your drinks you got chilling or
whatever and and and but when they came man i was like i'm not finna take him from his fish family
man y'all can't fishing's too slow pace for me it on the same way with the beach i love the beach but i don't spend
any time on the sand it's the water i like the water i like the waves the shallow part the deep
part the super deep part i i'm talking like i still do it i don't but i'd swim out way far
where you couldn't see land anymore like that's my jam that's so fucking scary i hate that
exactly the opposite i don't fuck with the water i would swim out
the bottom anymore i've gone already i've gone way too far i just swim out and it's like all
right i can't see land but i can still see like hotels and you know or like telephone poles and
stuff and it's like all right now i can just see the tips of hotels. How far out, you know? Why would you do this? Trying to die, bro.
Fuck that.
I hate even hearing that.
I really liked it.
If you put me out that far from the shore and I had nothing but a loaded gun in my hand, I just did.
First of all, try and get past sharks.
In hindsight, maybe this is a bit of a dick move
so uh i was a lifeguard on the beach and um it's really really seniority based wait hold on g
you was a lifeguard and you was just fucking swimming he was on duty and you just out there
bro well we'd have someone watching too but yeah yeah so the first day the first and last hour
you were allowed to work out at the beginning and ending of the first day, the first and last hour, there's someone struggling. I'm all out.
You were allowed to work out at the beginning and ending of the day.
It was less busy and someone else would watch the crowd.
Cool.
So you had the,
you had a level of power over the other guy who didn't have your seniority.
So I'd be like, all right, we're swimming.
And maybe he didn't want to,
or maybe he just wanted to less than me,
but it's like,
no,
let's go farther.
And there's like this,
like,
it's just a,
a,
a power imbalance where he,
he's not supposed to say no.
Isn't this from a movie?
And then you,
then you get to go to space.
Oh Jesus.
This is literally the scene from Gattaca
where the brother who is genetically engineered
is like, how are you doing this?
And he's like, I never saved a human.
I'm on drugs.
It didn't make any sense, that scene.
And no, it wasn't.
First of all, they didn't even go out very far, I don't think.
It made so much sense.
That's what you took away from that scene?
He's not talking about the swimming.
Because he's not referring to the swimming.
When he's asking him, how are you doing this?
He's saying, I didn't say anything for the return journey.
He's talking about life.
He's saying that he's headed, he's got a goal, he's heading for it.
There is no going back.
Like, everything is being put into this goal of his of going to space.
That's what he's talking about.
Well, if that's the case,. He just didn't answer the question.
The guy wants to know how he's out swimming him.
And he's like, oh, well, my plan is not
to come back. Well, he does come back
every time.
How is he doing it? Yeah, but that's a mental
barrier that he's breaking.
He's not thinking
about saving anything for coming back.
He's just all about
winning. And if he has to die to win, he will. thinking about saving anything for the back he for coming back he's just all about winning and
if he dies if he has to die to win he will now i like to understand it back but he never dies
so like he is that's why it's a good movie he's outperforming him physically he's outperforming
him physically he's like how are you outperforming me physically and he's like well i'm a really poor
planner and it's like but he's not he's out
performing him mentally the the engineer brother could swim farther but but but he's saving
something for the way back yeah yeah if if he were as one-minded uh about about the about winning
as the brother is he could out swim him but he's not he's thinking i i gotta go back i can't how
are you doing this like because i'm not
now that i'm thinking about it i didn't like that movie dude cain velasquez i love that something
similar in fight if cain velasquez was a ufc heavyweight champion for those that don't know
and uh he was known for having outstanding cardio right he would take guys down he just
fearsome it was very scary to fight this guy, partly because he weaponized cardio, which
doesn't usually happen in the heavyweight class. And they asked him about it and he got to talking
and he was like, you know, it's not that I'm not tired. I'm exhausted. I think I'm just a little
less exhausted than you. And he's like, and that was his thing. He's like, I'm tuckered out, but
if I can just make you a little more tuckered out than me, then that's good enough. It's like,
make you a little more tuckered out than me then that's good enough it's like yeah actually that's a great point because like when um i've never seen that movie by the way gattaca oh it's good
but um like when when you train people people have like this illusion like where you don't get
tired because you train so much but that's not it it's just you're tired you just know how to deal
with it better than the person who's not like i'm still exhausted like i people i kind of flip when i when i say this as a running back i fucking hate
running i hate it i do not like it i do not enjoy it but it paid the bills but i i found a way to
in my exhaustion still keep my composure still keep my coordination better than somebody who didn't train as much.
So that's all it is.
It's just you're training your body in order to function at a high level while it's tired.
Were you always a running back or did they put you there just because that's where you naturally were best?
No.
Well, I think when you're in Little League, if you're the best athlete, they put you at running back because you get the ball in their hands.
And so I started, I was obviously the best athlete on my team in a little in little league and i was like i was that cat like in
little league scoring like five six touchdowns a game and shit and um and i think i was just like
what did he say i didn't understand the words you were at i was that i was that dude oh in little
league that scored like five or six touchdowns a game and like i think as uh uh as as you know as my career as my journey
in football went along it was just a natural position they asked me i should have switched
the quarterback because i was i had i had a nice arm i should have switched the quarterback when i
was how tall are you six one oh okay yeah i've been straight yeah that would have been fun and
you i mean quarterbacks get to play the longest most of the time right or i guess kicker is probably the most i might have still retired though
that was gonna be my question all right i don't care
so like if you weren't a running running back seems like a punishing position to me
it seems physically punishing though right like i see
those guys get hit and and they they naturally do that thing where they just pop back up and look at
the guy that hit him and they're like you mean hit me hard i didn't i didn't feel that and and
then they like went back to the fucking hell literally god that damn he hit me hard one of
those i had one so the hardest hit i've ever been hit was by Clint Session. I'll never forget this dude.
It was by Clint Session in 2010.
It was playing the Indianapolis Colts.
And I'm going up the middle, and he's small.
He was like 5'7", 5'8". He was real small.
And I'm a taller running back, so I run upright.
He comes, and he puts his helmet right in my chest.
Literally couldn't breathe for like three seconds.
I was like gasping for air.
And he's standing over me. He was like, yeah,
motherfucker. I was like, man, you a bitch. That shit ain't
hard. I was just talking all kinds of shit. And I went
back to the hell like, I cannot fucking breathe
though. Oh my God.
But you can't let him know.
I remember
the only breath I could muster was to talk
shit to him.
I remember 2011. We was in the preseason it was the
the fourth preseason game where like the starters don't play right and i was on the sidelines and
it's like the like the third team like right the the the cast are like on a bubble that might even
make the team are playing and i'm watching from the sidelines and i'm looking at like yo they are
hitting this like god i'm looking i've never seen it from that perspective because I'm always playing
or I'm on a bench just kind of trying to gather my thoughts or whatever.
And so I'm watching it, and they're going at it.
And there was a team doctor standing by me, and I was like, yo,
do we be hitting like that?
And he's like, oh, yeah, it's much worse though.
I was like, God.
When you're in it, you don't really feel it because you've got adrenaline
and all kinds of shit going on.
But I was looking from the side Like, yo, this is violent.
I might retire.
This sucks.
So yeah. Yeah. Like, like my, my point earlier, like if you were a quarterback,
somewhere, somebody that, you know, you might get sacked twice,
a bad game, you're getting sacked four times. And it's really not even that bad.
I mean, you know, not usually.
I mean, sometimes it is.
This year we saw some QBs take some rough fucking hits.
But anyway, like, do you think you would have stayed longer
if you were just, like, jogging out there?
You didn't even have to be that athletic, really.
Like, you don't have – probably not doing wind sprints, you know,
every day at practice.
You're, you know, designing plays and shit.
Do you think you'd have stayed longer if you had an easier job?
I'm saying easier.
It's a hard fucking job.
But you're not getting nailed left and right like a running back.
That's one of my hot takes.
Quarterbacks are not very good athletes, man.
Most of them.
Most of them.
There's no telling.
I think that's the biggest thing right in in in the nfl and in general and how they value their athletes is they they're convinced that
once you like like as a as a player you have to go through like physical conditioning of actually
playing football in order to get into football shape so what i mean by that is like during
training camp you have to you have to hit catch you got to be hit you got to scrimmage you
got to do nine on sevens where it's literally just you uh the offensive line you guys and then
the the front seven so like the the d line and the linebackers and some safeties and they know
you're running and you just go like it's a drill that you do and it's like they think that you have
to do that in order to get ready well it's like i'm taking all these the majority of my injuries and all the hits that
i took happened in practice didn't happen during the games and so the the wear and tear on the
body happens from preparing for the games and but as a quarterback they got red jerseys on a green
jersey zone you're not allowed to hit them so like quarterbacks last now it's because they treat them
better that's the only reason like they just they get, they get to not get hit into the game.
When, if you're a professional, in my opinion, you're a professional,
you should be ready for that contact.
Like, like I always told my offensive coordinator,
like I don't even need to be here until Saturday.
Tell me the game plan and let me take care of my body throughout the week.
But they're convinced that, that they need,
you need that physical exertion.
I didn't need it.
I know my body.
I feel like I heard both things right there.
On one hand, I'm a professional.
I can just come Saturday.
And I also think you said as a quarterback, they should be prepared to get hit.
Am I right on this?
No, I didn't say the quarterback should be prepared to hit.
They think that they are more valuable, right?
And so they don't let them get hit.
And so they just take care of them better.
And it's a conscious effort to we got to protect the quarterback.
It's the same way that they treat goalies in hockey,
where it's like, don't fucking touch that,
because if that guy goes down, nobody else wants to play that position.
So should there be less hitting in practice?
In general.
Oh, yeah.
That's what fighters are moving to now.
Oh, yeah.
It makes sense.
Football is rooted in tradition, bro.
And it's like you have to – it's a tough guy.
I remember when I was in college, it was like, oh, you saw a few bitches
if you wanted water.
I'm like, what?
Yeah, you should be
hydrated what kind of stupid shit is this like um uh if if you're if we're doing wind sprints right
and like you know you put your hands on your knees when you're tired they're like those are
they just call them those are that's a bitch position that's a bitch hands like get you get
up like trying to catch my breath what the fuck does that have to do that's nothing to do with
anything i was like when you say go i'm gonna go bro let me catch my breath how i catch my breath and interestingly enough there was a study that came out that said
that's the that position when you're bent over with your hands on your knees it actually provides
you with more oxygen so i'm like your body's natural position is to get the most oxygen and
so it's like little shit like that that's just tradition uh they'll never let go of in football
because that's just how it's it's just how it's done hopefully they do and it's funny you say like it's an american thing because that's why you know hockey's the sport i follow
closest so i use them as an example like that's why like russia had way better players for the
longest time because like the way americans practice and canadians even was like all right
three times a week you know we only have a little ice time we're gonna bust our ass going game speed
hitting each other really rough meanwhile r, Russians were like, yeah,
obviously we're not going to be throwing hits.
We play on the same team and we're not going to go 100%.
We're going to have a bunch of practice where we focus on tactics.
We're going to get three times as much time on the ice as the Americans.
And we're going to go at probably half the intensity.
So at the end of the week, who really got more training?
The Russians.
And they aren't injured.
You know?
It'll happen. And it'll be you know it'll it'll happen and it'll be
in a like it'll it'll change the game but like so what happens with these coaches these coaches
have like coaching trees right so like billichick is from he was up under i think parcells and
parcells was up under somebody else and so and everybody on that staff kind of takes that
um the kind of the the environment that that that coach cultivated and
then they bring it into their own and the system and everything and then that environment just
trickles down it's like this umbrella of coaches why it's like pure nepotism and why there's so
much coach shuffling around um and so every single coach has been up under a lineage of a tree and so
in their minds this is how you win, right? Because that's how
they were taught. This is how it's done. They don't really have a real reason. There's not a
lot of science behind it. There's not a lot of study behind it. I think what happened in the
next 10, 20 years, because cats are starting to realize that they have a voice, they're going to
start voicing their concerns and you're going to get more and more less physical practices, less physical things like that, because it's just better for business in general.
Like that's what they really don't understand is like the longevity of your athletes is the most important thing.
Sure. So I always tell my my my running back coach, I'm like, dog, like there's like we're doing like individuals like each each position group will go do individuals.
I'm like, we don't need to be running through fucking bags
and doing ball drills and running and
sprinting. I'm like, that's what I do for a living.
What we need to do is like, let's take a period to sit down
and stretch or sit down and
hydrate and just relax or
go over play, that type of shit. Because it just
makes more sense. You're taking care of your body.
Monday through Saturday,
I should be
stretching. I should be getting ice tubs.
I should be getting massages, three massages a week,
all paid for by the staff.
It just makes sense, but we just got to go.
Just the way it's done, that head ass.
You were talking about Brady and the quarterback stuff.
I wanted to ask about the quarterback.
Go ahead.
You were talking about how quarterbacks are more protected, and obviously they are protected. and the quarterback stuff i wanted to ask about the quarterback you can go ahead um so you were
talking about like how quarterbacks are more protected and obviously they're you know they
are protected you know there's special rules like isn't roughing the quarterback you can't do that
right that that's so weird that is weird as a non-football fan it is funny that like but then
i guess the goalies you can't hit them but uh do you think like football twitter and football
online seems to like all agree like this last super bowl like brady is the goat do you think like football, Twitter, and football online seems to like all agree
like this last Super Bowl, like Brady is the GOAT.
Do you think so or no?
Do you think anybody's coming?
I saw some people being like Mahomes.
Ten years from now, Mahomes will be the new Brady.
But what do you think about all that?
I got a different – I got a little – I got drunk when I was watching Super Bowl.
Ah, fun.
And I got on Twitter.
That's so much fun.
And I voiced my opinion about this.
I don't think Tom Brady is the greatest quarterback of all time.
I think he's the most decorated, for sure.
And I think he's up there, right?
Top three, something like that.
But as far as talented and skill set-wise, I just don't think he's the best.
Who would you put above him?
Aaron Rodgers.
Aaron Rodgers is unreal about what he can do on the field.
But he just doesn't have the coaching staff.
He doesn't have the players around him to win at the capacity.
And I think that's the biggest farce in football is your quarterback can take you to the championship.
There's 21 other guys on the squad like at any given time right starters on offense
and defense so it's like if you don't have like if you look at like tom brady the majority of his
superbowls he always had like a really great defense or had a really good run game or he had
really good receivers like there's there's always pieces to his puzzle and don't remember i'm not
taking anything away from he's great what he does i think there's just a farce in saying that your quarterback
wins superbowls it's just it's just not that it's just not the case there's so many things
that have to go right in order for you to win a super as a great quarterback and people get
like dan marino dan marino is one of the greatest quarterbacks obviously of all time but he just
didn't never have the good defense he didn't have a good run game all pieces put together to where
he can actually win a championship it's not like he choked and shit it's just that's just how the
cookie crumbles and it's like football is not basketball like i said lebron can definitely
without a doubt carry your team to a championship a quarterback by himself cannot you need receivers
to make those plays you need linemen to block you need defense to stop them or else you're not
winning do you think that uh belichick had more to do with it than
than brady like no that that that i don't think i think belichick's a great coach but i think tom
brady uh made him a better coach you think so because it seems like tom brady's at that age
where it's like oh he's like twice the age of a lot of his teammates like it almost seems like
he'd be the de facto coach in some situations. Yeah. I mean, Bilicek is a defensive coach,
so Bilicek didn't really have nothing to do with the offense.
So he always had an OC or Tom Brady.
You know what I'm saying?
That's one thing when you have a really good quarterback is like they –
you can have meetings with the OC, tell them what you like,
tell them what you don't like, that kind of thing.
Bilicek was like special teams in defense.
Like that's what he does.
And so that's what I'm saying is like they're always going to have a stout defense because that's what Bilicek does. And Bilicek is a great coach. That's what he does. That's what I'm saying. They're always going to have a stout defense
because that's what Bilicek does. Bilicek is a great
coach, don't get me wrong, but you need
it all in order to win.
That's point in case
Brady leaves and you don't make the playoffs.
It's not because
you're not a good coach. It's because you just know how to
play. That's what it is. Jordan said it the
best. It was in basketball, but it's the same thing. Jordan
in the Hall of Fame speech, he was like, yo, players put coaches in the Hall of Fame. That is what it is like jordan said it the best and it was in basketball but it's the same thing jordan in the hall of fame speech he was like yo players put coaches in the hall of
fame that is what it is like you you can have the greatest fucking lines in the world that you draw
but if you don't have players to execute that shit you're not gonna win yeah for sure did did
you only play or how many coaches i guess did you play under uh when you were in the nfl three
three three doing all pretty similar in your eyes?
Obviously, you don't have to name names or anything.
Yeah, no, different styles.
Different styles.
Kubiak was a great coach.
Super traditional, though.
He was one of the guys where it's like, my system wins.
If you do what I say, the system will take us where we need to go.
I played for Bill O'Brien, where he was more of like a – when I played for him anyway, I don't know.
Everybody said he kind of lost his way when I left.
But he was a little more controlling when I left.
That's what they say.
I don't know.
That's what the fellas told me.
But he was more – when I was there, it was like, yo, y'all do this.
Like, so we need to be in communication.
Like, you tell me what you want to do, we're going to do it.
And it was just like a smooth running engine like that. then i went i played for adam gaze who got a lot of
flack because the same situation when i was with him in miami i loved him i absolutely loved him
he was dope he he was a player coach he listened to you i thought he was he he called the plays
good and and actually that that year miami went to the playoffs first time in a long time um but
they when i left they said he kind of like not anything i don't
think it had anything to do with me i think he just got comfortable and ran it how he wanted to
was he uh he kind of took more control that's the biggest thing i think when coaches start
getting that ego it's like you do it my way rather than like understanding like yo
you know your players have to run this shit man yeah. Yeah. Man, that makes sense. That would...
Oh, go ahead, Woody.
I saw you on the Joe Rogan podcast.
And you told him you wished you hadn't played football, I think.
I have that pretty on target.
Yeah, you said that.
I said that.
You still feel like that?
I projected so much onto that.
I could go and go.
I'll do it for a moment.
I have this idea that you've been very successful, right?
Your life so far, 10 out of 10.
And there's almost a kind of like survivor's bias where like, man, because...
What's the metric though?
You said my life so far has been 10 out of 10.
What's the metric?
Oh, that is a really good question.
And I don't have the insight into what your life is really like to say that.
It's just from the outside though
doing cocaine every night and killing babies what do you don't know
touche right but it sounds like a hell of a time yeah actually still 10 out of 10 11 out of 10
so the but i guess what i'm saying if i went to the the movie theater line and found 10 people
and said would you trade your life experience with Aryans?
I think all 10 would say yes.
All 10 would say, you know what?
He's had a better one than me so far.
We're playing this game of life and this guy's freaking killing it.
Cool.
And you're like, man, I think I could do even better.
And I'm like, is this a kind of survivor's bias where, like,
you do so well,
you think you could achieve that same level of success at anything you tried
well i think it depends on how you gauge success i think that's what hit me when i got
quote-unquote success was you kind of realize that um it's a relative term that success
doesn't necessarily mean monetary value uh and so when I meant by that was I wish I wouldn't have done it.
I know that I have so much more to give of myself, right?
I feel like I kind of robbed myself of a lot of my prime years of study, of experience, exploring things that would have made me a better human rather than
things that would have produced more value for an organization and so um i look at it in terms
of that rather than how much money i made because uh don't get me wrong like i understand we live
in a society where that's you got to make money in order to survive but i don't look at success like that anymore i did when i was young i was like yo i was i had
go i wanted to make 100 million dollars i wanted to be a billionaire eventually like those are
kinds of things i aspire to do but once i got a certain point financially i realized to me that's
there's nowhere near fulfilling none of that shit fulfills me. Um, it, it, it just fills voids. That is just a never ending
abyss that you'll never be able to fill. And so, um, for me, uh, knowing who I am and knowing what
my interests are and knowing what I'm talented at and knowing what, uh, I can do, uh, once I
focus and harness that energy in that direction, um, there's no doubt in my mind, I could have
done something way more impactful towards humanity.
And not to say that I can't anymore.
It's just that it's a longer road in order to give yourself the 10,000 hours in order to master a craft to where you're respected in that field.
I assign a lot more randomness and luck to success.
Oh, I'm a thousand percent. So I'm like, man, let's say arian foster right but in 11th grade the poor guy
loses his leg below the knee right that guy's still smart he's still introspective he's still
interesting but he's not a running back arian foster the cpa maybe isn't nearly as like i don't
know worldly and experienced he hasn't football may have added more to you as in like an RPG character
than you gave it credit for.
You see it as taking away from the time you could have been playing guitar.
I see it as taking you and showing you the planet.
Well, not only that, right?
Like it's given you the opportunity that now you can spend 10,000.
You have as many 10,000 hours as you want, right?
If you want to learn guitar or French or French guitar,
you've got all the time to do it.
I'm going to trust that's a thing.
Oh, yeah.
French guitar.
It's the same as American guitar.
It's a little more douchey.
It's American guitar, but with tongue.
Now you're not wrong, right? Where it's like, I'm not appreciative of the things that, that,
that my sacrifices have allotted me. Um, it's just that I know the sacrifices that I actually
gave. And so it was, it was time and it was time doing things
I didn't want to do in a, in a, in a way that wasn't impactful in my eyes. Right. Because you
said it made me more worldly. Did you mean it made me more like well-traveled? Like it gave
me the opportunity to be more traveled. I travel and meeting a lot of people with the things in my
head. Right. Okay. Yeah. I mean, and you're not wrong about that.
And this is hyperbolic because, I mean, we can't go back in time.
But I just know me.
I know me and I know I'm a people person.
I know what I could have accomplished in other fields.
And I would have been successful, in my eyes uh a lot quicker
and uh with a lot more um substance than playing football i feel what you're saying i'm surprised
i'm surprised you say that that's a lot like like that's an interesting take but like so if you
imagine there's like the many worlds theory right
there's like infinite dimensions and there's infinite versions of you that did infinite
you know infinite careers right i mean there's a reality where you spent years
yeah well yeah that one exists and there's one where you're a cpa and you know there's one
where you're a fucking mass shooter or something crazy, right? But the one where, like, yeah, unfortunately.
But then there's a one where it also prevents mass shootings because, you know, it's infinite, right?
Balance.
There's one where you're a white supremacist and it's very awkward for everyone.
It's really weird.
So it makes sense.
I wish that Brian could have the experience.
Kyle, were you finished?
Did you have more?
I'm sorry.
No, not at all.
could have the experience. Kyle, were you finished?
Did you have more? I'm sorry. No, not at all.
But like the one
where you made millions of dollars and
you made all those contacts, right? The
travel is one thing, but who cares about fucking
touching 40 different states, right?
Anybody with a bus pass can do that.
It's about who you met when
you did all that traveling. You were part of
a fraternity of guys who are
all multi-millionaires
now so like if you have some big idea now if you're like oh i got the idea i just need i just
need some investors i wonder if i know a few dozen multi-millionaires you do right you know you could
be like guys like put put 500 grand in this we all put 500 grand in this. We all put 500 grand in this.
We all got 10 million in 10 years. Let's just do this thing. I don't know.
I definitely believe that there are alternate universe versions of you that are even more ridiculously
successful, but this is in the top 5%.
Yeah, you're in a good one. I'm in a good universe, man.
For sure, i'm not like not appreciative right um i think that uh it's just the way that i view success now
it's different it's it's because i grew up in the projects i grew up like not having food at night
like that type of shit and like when you come from that i was i had one goal like everybody around nobody around me had money and so i was
like okay i'm gonna go get money right that was my that was my goal and then you get money and
you're like okay is was that it was that the goal was that is that it and i realized no that's not
the goal like the goal is to enhance the the environment that you have been brought into, right,
on a wide scale as much as you can.
And, like, that's the goal to me.
And so I think that I wasted a lot of time not doing that.
And I think the bigger lesson that I learned, man, is, like,
I've met a lot of my heroes.
And I don't advise people to meet their heroes because, yo, people are just full of shit, man. Like, just to be 100% to meet their heroes because yo people are just full of
shit man like just to be 100 like yo people are just full of shit man they stuck on themselves
they they care they read the press and they believe that shit and they're just they're just
not centered people and i met like one of my heroes that you know i had a short conversation
with i was impressed with who he was.
But at the end of the day, you realize that's the one thing you realize.
You're just a human.
You're not a superhero.
And that's the easy thing to say.
But when you have people who are heralded in your eyes, you hold them to a certain amount of reverence.
And then you forget about the homeless man on the street who nobody cared about that.
He might've been a great human being,
but just nobody cared about him.
And then you realize on a deeper level that not everybody has that opportunity,
right?
I had an opportunity.
Like you said,
Woody success has a lot of luck and people that don't say that shit are
fucking assholes to me.
And they're just,
they're just,
they're full of shit,
man.
Because like, in order for me to do what I did, like certain things had to fall in place. that shit are fucking assholes to me and they're just they're just they're full of shit man because
like in order for me to do what i did like certain things had to fall in place and if they didn't fall
in place there's no telling what would have happened i'm pretty sure i would have found a way
to survive and feed my family but for this reality to be to be true certain things had to fall in
place and it was fucking lucky and it was just pure luck i get
nothing else and a lot of people don't have those breaks fall for them my brother's a perfect
example just as good as an athlete as i was right had a coach in high school who turned colleges
away uh just had a bad break in college when he finally got to college like shit just kept going
bad for him and bad for him and bad for him he just didn't catch a break worked his ass off
i learned how to run long distance from my brother.
He worked way harder than me, right?
He probably can outrun me right now.
Is he older or younger?
He's older.
He could probably outrun me when I was in the league.
He just worked harder than me.
But he just didn't catch a break here, didn't catch a break there,
didn't catch a break there.
And it's like that kind of shit is's really that's that's what really woke me up was when you see
the farce like that american uh uh dream is like all you got to do is work hard no
hell no you have to have some happen along the way that you had no control over
and yeah that is that is the truth there's a bunch of partners that work hard as and
they're not rich they work unbelievably hard
yeah there's that whole cliche right luck is when opportunity meets preparation
so you get credit for some of this right sure sure those that opportunity part
yeah if i wasn't prepared it would have passed me by not everyone gets the same opportunities
you know and that's that's where the luck part is.
I'm cautious about comparing my success to yours.
It's not the same.
But I lived a life before I had. What's your metric, though?
What's your metric, though?
You keep saying that.
What is your metric?
I guess I was just going on impact.
I don't know.
But here's where I'm headed with this.
Got you.
Before YouTube, I had a whole career, like a good amount of life going on before I had any kind of,
you know, YouTube success. And I had a better than average career in IT, but still ordinary,
you know, and I had a wife, two kids, great. And then the YouTube came along and that was
an extraordinary thing for me that went super well and then the woody craft thing but because of the first section of that life there the first third it's made me realize
that like oh yeah i'm not midas on this thing not everything is gold i'm really happy that that a
couple of them were but uh it keeps it in check. That's all.
Come on.
You grind it harder than anybody.
You said the first third of life.
I don't know about that.
You know, you started at 38.
You're pretty ambitious here, Woody.
The first third of my career, I should have said. Yeah, Woody was 108.
Kyle and I are long dead.
No, see, I'll kiss Woody's ass for a minute.
I feel like you grinded that thing harder than anybody.
There was that opportunity there.
It was almost like there was a bit of a gold rush going on on YouTube,
just like the old San Francisco gold rush. There's gold in them hills. And a bunch of guys got out there with
a pick and a shovel, and they worked three days a week. And they had enough gold to head over to
the saloon and get a woman and play some cards. And then they were broke on Monday. And they're
like, ah, well, I can work three days this week week and I'll have enough to do it all over again. And you were
like, I got to get the best picks and the best shovels. And there's not going to be time to go
back to town. So I'm going to have to build a cabin out here next to the Creek where I get my
gold. I'm just going to sleep right here next to where I pan for the gold. And I'm gonna need to
hire a guy to carry my gold to town. Cause I don't have time to be going and weighing my own gold i gotta be digging gold you know what maybe i could hire a
couple guys to help me dig this gold yeah i'll do that like you grinded it harder than anybody
there is a lot yeah it was one of the man had a look when i when i'm making that little
comparison of like sleeping next to the creek where the gold comes
from woody put a bunk bed above the desk he worked from and instead of going back to bed with his
wife when he was done with his work he climbed into this little bunk bed above his workspace
it was like like where he's sitting now like bunk bed up there and climb into that motherfucker
and get enough sleep so that his brain would work
again and then climb back down take a piss and get back to fucking work you know like woody had
the great heart of anybody like uh not even benefit just life experience of like when the
whole gold rush was happening on like let's say 2010 youtube you know i was 19 2010 and most of the people who were doing it were my age and like young
young guys woody's coming from a professional world where he's like oh well this is what i'm
doing now two videos a day what what happens if you don't make two videos a day what what are you
talking about that's what i do every day you you make two videos a day and then you prepare for
the next day's videos and that's just and then you go to bed and then you wake up and then you
make the video that's just what you do and it was like i think you uploaded two videos a day and then you prepare for the next day's videos and that's just and then you go to bed and then you wake up and then you make the video that's just what you do and it was like i
think you uploaded two videos a day for like two years on end or something something outrageous
like where you never guessed yeah i was like same gameplay again sorry guys
that one was in front of me at chipotle today so i got a story like just
i like your videos.
Yeah, people liked them. The gameplay was
awful.
It was just fucking shitty.
Kyle, you might be muted.
You are muted.
I was saying I give Woody a lot of credit for
his success because
you know, like
you weren't the best
at necessarily anything.
You were the most...
Don't get me wrong here. I don't want this to come off the wrong way.
There were guys who were just like
head, pants on fire
retardedly good at
playing the game.
We know those guys
and we all aspired
to be like them.
Oh my god god this guy just
just he's just the best at it but he's not the best at youtube he's not at the best at
monetizing this thing you know because personality comes into play worth that work ethic comes into
play a little bit of tech uh technological uh grasping comes into play editing comes into play
there's a lot of facets to this game just like any other game and you like excelled at grinding at all of them right like you were you were good enough at all
of them that the the the aggregate score was was just way the fuck up there but i say i think that's
that's the that's kind of plays to my point right i think a lot of people when they hear me say
yo there's a lot of luck involved that somehow disqualifies or erases the work that you put it in like it
absolutely doesn't that's not what i'm saying like i'll never let i remember said i sat across
a coach one time who told me yo i don't feel like you're working hard i told that motherfucker who
had the ability to fire me to say yo you can you can call me whatever you want but the one thing
you can't say is i don't work hard i was like i'm up at five in the morning you ain't around like i
i work my ass from nothing and you ain't gonna be able to sit there and tell
that to my face and like he respected that right so it's not i don't when i say there's a lot of
luck involved i'm not necessarily saying yo you didn't work bro it just it was handed to you not
but there were certain things along the way like like if there wasn't a 2010 gold rush right if
you two didn't get created where's woody if, if you didn't have a certain it background and knowledge, right. And I don't know how you got to there, but I'm pretty sure there were some things along the way where you had access to certain things that not everybody did along the way, but you took advantage of them. Right. But there were certain things that just happened to fall in place and then bam, Woody Poppin. Right. That's, that's my, that's my point where, and a lot of people don't get me wrong a lot of people don't work hard don't get me wrong
a lot of people don't work hard at all but a lot of people do work hard and they just can't get
the breaks and that's just my whole point bringing it all back around for sure well i mean like yeah
then like woody what you said where it's like the what is it opportunity meets or preparedness
meets opportunity like that really is what it is
like aaron you happen to have an opportunity which like you said most a lot of maybe even
most people don't get stuff like that but because you were ready for it you were able to capitalize
like that's really all you can do is like try and anticipate an opportunity and trying to be
try to be prepared for whatever that you know which is luck too right because um if if i would be
lying if i say yo i was just born disciplined yeah i just wasn't like i did my my when i grew
when i was growing up my room was dirty as shit i was shitty in school i just didn't i didn't have
a lot of motivation to be prepared but i had a father that was like yo if you want to do this
this is this is what you have to do you got to do i was running the
hills at 12 years old right like stupid shit like who does that i rode my bike across town
to this hill that he showed me i used to ride my bike every day to go do that in high school when
cats was done with practice i would be taking laps i would be running and one of my mans to
this day my best friends from high school he he told me um not too long like a year ago he was
like yo i remember we used to make fun of of you as a group because after practice you would be running and we would be going to hang out.
So it's like, I got that discipline instilled in me. And it was just blind faith because I didn't
know my pops was broke when we were growing up. So I'm like, I'm listening to him. He got the
answers just because of the reverence I had for him being my father. But it was guidance, right?
I was lucky a lot
of the cats i grew up with didn't have fathers around like that to show them the ropes or maybe
it was working all day and all night and they couldn't give them that guidance or they didn't
have that insight or whatever the case may be that kind of shit just luck i just looked over
how to pops it was like yo this is the way anyone watching you run hills or just go over and do it
so i don't know man i must though i had i had a i had a vision though like
it was because i'm young as fuck watching hills so like if i had a player in my mind
uh i would think of that player like yo he's probably running hills right now
or um was this a peer or like uh no somebody who's already made it somebody's already made it
um i remember i remember vividly i used to pretend i used to trick myself and be like like, yo, there's a million dollars at the top of this hill.
There's a million dollars at the top of this hill because I'd be dead ass tired.
I'm like, go get the money.
And I used to do that shit like in school and in college.
We used to do this stupid shit called check-in.
So if you were young, you had to walk all the way across campus just to sign a piece of paper to say that you was up and then go back.
Even if you didn't have class, it just stupid shit what he has dumb as hell though
they're just all about controlling college but i used to do that and the motivation for me to get
up was like yo go go get your million dollars it was that i used to just over and over again go get
your million dollars and that was instilled in me because my father was like yo there's money at the
end of this go get this like. And that's just luck.
I still had to do it, though.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's funny.
You're like, I worked so hard.
I worked so hard.
I was so disciplined.
Luck, really?
And I'm like, I'm hearing a lot outside of luck.
Now, I know you know.
It's not mutually exclusive.
I know.
It's not mutually exclusive.
Yeah, the luck happened.
And because he was working so hard, he was able to capitalize it.
Right. Were there any days that you had been like fucking off and that luck happened, and because he was working so hard, he was able to capitalize it.
Were there any days that you had been fucking off and that luck happened?
It probably would have just passed you by.
There's a lot of opportunities I missed because I was fucking off.
I'm not a Nazi about working out.
My career could have went a lot smoother if I was a little bit more disciplined.
Do you know who Destroying is?
He's a YouTuber.
I don't know what Destroying is.
I don't know.
It might be different.
Anyway, then you won't know the follow-up.
He's a football player, and he's a YouTuber.
He played for that really good Florida team that doesn't always have tough competition.
Is it UCF, maybe? I competition. Is it UCF? Maybe.
I think it is.
UCF, probably.
And he's a kicker and he wants to be a pro.
Oh, I heard about him.
It looks like he's, as a guy who doesn't know what he's looking at. Didn't the NCAA tell him he couldn't do his YouTube or something like that?
Yes.
So he went with YouTube because he's-
That's bullshit.
Yeah.
I think it's bullshit too.
I think it's bullshit too.
Yeah.
How bad them fucking crooks are
I wish they had let him do it
but anyway yeah
he went with YouTube instead of
his football career
but on YouTube he's so in shape
and he's really good at kicking
as far as I can tell
he made a Canadian team
but apparently Canadian teams
have to be some big percentage Canadian, like 80% Canadians.
It's not just best player.
So they're like, you know, we like you, but we don't like you so much that we're going to use one of our rare non-Canadian slots.
So he made but didn't stay on the team or something weird like that.
And I want to know your opinion on him, but it sounds like you're not tied into it. I'm vaguely familiar with who he is.
I mean, I don't know if he's good enough.
And honestly, kickers, I mean, kickers are kickers, man.
Like I think that's what it is.
I think if he was like a killer killer quarterback like you're getting one of those
spots but it's like you're a kicker so you're kind of a little bit more expendable you have to be like
insane you you should be able you could be able to change the your field position on every punt
if that was the case or or you you'd be able to kick 50 yarders and you don't miss
if if we're gonna waste that slot on you that that's probably is there a guy is a super athlete
like i you don't gotta be for a kicker though that's the. That's probably – This guy is a super athlete.
Like I – He don't got to be for a kicker though.
That's the thing.
I don't know if he's a super kicker.
I swear if you put him at wide receiver,
he'd only be a step behind the guys in the league.
Like he's – he practices with them.
He knows them.
Like I see him defend them.
Look, I don't know what I'm looking at, right?
I'm sure you're right.
If he's a step behind the guys in the league, he would be trying to play receiver not kicker i promise you
he's always like hey here's the number one recruit you know for coming out of high school
this year or here's a guy who's you know all american in football and he's like he seems to
be their athletic peer to my dumb ass i I mean, I'm not a football –
He looks like their athletic peer at least.
Yeah, yeah.
He might be like you though, Woody.
Right?
Look like it.
I don't know.
I don't want to show up, buddy.
I have no idea.
Anyway, so we're getting a little deep into this.
But, yeah, I was wondering if you had an opinion.
It would be funny to see what you thought of him.
I wonder how he's doing.
That's the position I'd want, by the way.
No doubt.
Maybe I should play.
It's the gym teacher of football.
You can be that clutch guy.
He's the gym teacher of football,
but even better than the gym teacher of football
because those guys have such longevity
because for one thing, nobody's fucking hitting them.
And for another, like... He's like, nobody's fucking hitting them. And for another, like –
Isn't there one guy who's, like, 45 and he's still awesome?
Who?
There's some kicker who's, like, in his 40s and he's just so good at kicking
that he just keeps –
I played –
Does it start with a V?
Probably.
There's going to be a Hall of Fame punter.
I played with him.
His name is Shane Leckler.
Shane Leckler is probably one of the greatest punters of all time.
And he was, like, 40-something when I played with him.
And he's just the coolest fucking dude ever.
And the funny thing about Kickers, dog, is like during practice and training camp and all that shit, like, yo, they don't need – like coaches don't even – they just be over there.
Like, I saw them one time.
They was over there like – they brought golf clubs and they was over here just like shipping them.
It was just like nobody pays attention to Kickers until you need them.
Like, and as long as you – that's the thing about the league is like yo if you get your job done
don't give a fuck what you do
ever have a fantasy
that you're like you have a super power
that you're a legitimate superhero
I'm like how would life be
if I could hit a field goal from anywhere
right if anytime your team
got the ball you were guaranteed three points
because Woody can do it from the goal line.
Value, bro. Value.
There's a lot of value in that.
You'd be the first kicker with like a $100 million deal.
Right?
He's ruining football.
Three points, that's fire, though.
New rule, you can't kick field goals from the end zone it would ruin football like
if you could it wouldn't even have to be a it wouldn't even have to be 100 yarders like like
if you could kick a 75 yard field goal consistently like like 80 if you could do it 80 of the time
that alone would ruin football that's my that's my dream that guy
they'd make rules to like they'd make a new rule they would absolutely make a new rule
i hate it when they do that they did that in hockey martin brodeur is the goalie was way
too good at playing the puck and like the way you'd try and play was dump and chase
but because brodeur was a third defenseman and he was so good at coming out and getting the puck and then firing it up and ruining your dumping they literally made the broder rule
where they're like you can't you can't play the puck the way marty broder did for 20 years it's
absurd you can't do it anymore like they literally shut it's called the broder rule they got rid of
it it's so hard to play the puck as a goalie like i i swear i played c league beer league in north
carolina and like a regular defenseman or forward handles the puck as well as an nhl goalie it's
so much more difficult and like the ones who are good at handling that when i played like that i
was good at that because i had a coach who was very good at training goalie, like, puck handling.
So I always was trained to, like, come out of the net and handle it because there was no trapezoid in lower levels, even, like, the higher level ones.
But I was going to ask.
So, like, in hockey, at least, there's a stereotype.
Like, goalies are just fucking weird.
They're just odd people.
Are kickers kind of the weird people of the team on the football team, like a little odd man out, strange.
They just don't, like –
I say this with all due respect, right, because they're a part of the team.
But, like, if you're in the trenches every day and, like, you're a lineman,
you're a running back, and you're out here banging,
and it's like you don't really – they're part of the team.
But it's like you don't really look at them like that, right?
They're just kind of like,
those are the kickers.
Those are the special.
Yeah.
Those are special guys,
special teams guys.
And other than,
other than that,
you just,
it's a personality type thing.
Right.
Like,
so when,
when Shane Leckler was signed to Houston,
like I'd never really had that good a relationship with the punter,
but he was cool as fuck.
He was just the coolest coolest cat
on earth man and so we just we would chop it up his locker room his locker was like three or four
down from mine so you just chop it up he was just a super personable cat and so um he made it easy
to come and talk to him but i mean a lot of times there's cultural differences where it's like
especially when you order like that i think um uh like the like the kickers before him it's we just don't have a lot in common
so it's like super awkward conversation it's just cordial you're just cordial there's just there's
just no relationship but he made it a point to like yo let's kick it like just be friends yeah
special team socially not being part of the team is that just kickers or does that extend to like
punt return oh yeah no no it's kickers it's kickers if you if you if you're a special teams
player usually you're a second team and you do something else either your receiver or running
back or linebacker or something and you and you you grind in daily with everybody else what about
like backup quarterback or third string quarterback? They're like almost park coaches.
Their job seems academic.
Am I wrong on that?
Yeah.
I mean, that's how it looks because they got a clipboard and shit on the sidelines. I mean, they might know the offense, right?
So as a young cat or if you're like, yo, what do I got on this?
They'll tell you, right?
Because their job is just to be ready.
That's their whole job.
That's probably one of the best jobs in America is backup
quarterbacks.
You get paid a lot. Backup quarterbacks
be getting $7 million a year deals
and shit. They just pay to get
ready.
They cool. They can say
personality thing. There's a difference.
Majority of them are super cool.
Backup quarterbacks because they don't got a lot of stress on
them. You just get these big-ass checks, and you're just cool, you know what I mean,
until your number one goes down.
You talked about luck hitting people.
I remember because I went to Mizzou, and early, I think my freshman year
is when Chase Daniel left the QB for Mizzou,
and then he immediately won a championship with New Orleans right after.
And he's apparently just a backup making some insane amount of money.
And you just see pics of him on the sidelines.
And he's just like, clearly, this is the best reality I could have been.
Tell me, bro.
You don't got to do shit.
You don't get hit. You don't got to do shit. You don't get hit.
You have the stress of playing.
You're just out here learning
defenses and collecting checks.
There's a reality
where that guy was a starting QB,
blew his knee out one year
in. Now he's at a Kinko somewhere.
This is perfect reality.
The one where he's sitting over there like,
looks good out there.
I like that.
Try one further next time.
Have you tried throwing it hard?
Do you think,
Aaron,
do you think you could have been a pro in any of like the four major American
sports?
Like if you just would have been put towards hockey,
basketball,
baseball,
like,
do you think kind of your, you would have been able to capitalize on any of them?
I do.
I agree with you.
It's not an ego thing.
I think as a running back, this is why I say –
when I say running back is a harder position to play,
this is why I say it.
It's not biased because I played it.
It's just because I studied football.
In order to be an elite running back, right, it's not –
you can be a running back, but in order to be an elite running back where you're on the field three downs
and you can pass, protect, and you can block, in order to be elite,
you have to be able to outrun and maneuver the majority of the defense, right, to be elite.
You have to be able to catch like a wide receiver.
You have to be able to block like a tight end.
And you have to be smart enough to understand defenses so it's like you have to have the the the most variety in your skill set
and you have to be the most athletic on the field other than i say probably corner corner you have
to be extremely athletic right but um the most skill set is is running back in my opinion and
um not only that uh if you look at well not you but like when
when i was growing up football was not my favorite sport growing up basketball was um i just was
extremely better than everybody else at football off the rip like because you give me a ball and
it was just natural but with basketball it's more skill set driven so you had to put in time in order
to get your handles right to get your shot right it's more skill set driven. So you had to put in time in order to get your handles right, to get your shot right.
It's more skill set driven.
And so when I finally got the time to put in my skill set, and it was my latter years in high school, I got really fucking good.
And it was my favorite sport.
I loved basketball.
But I just never had the time to put it in because I always knew football was probably going to be my lane.
But I got so good.
I was like, y'all was looking like small looks from these small
colleges like and i didn't put in any time like that but i i finally got a chance to put a little
bit of time and like i remember we was in summer going into summer league for my senior year and
summer league is just like you just play catch from all across the city and i was just like
dropping 20 like i was just doing my thing like i was it was just crazy so if like if that was my
goal and i was doing that instead of running hills at 12, I was making left-hand dribbles
and going up and down the court, there's no doubt in my mind
I could have done that.
And with anything.
I'm just lucky.
I'm an athlete.
It's funny that every single player you played,
in every professional sports like this,
but that kid who was putting up 30 goals in five games
like Gretzky did as a youth
gretzky got death threats apparently because he scored in one season he scored 97 goals in 25
games and like that that's a tremendous amount of goals you know yeah i'm kind of siding with
the death threat that's all the goals in to him, that wasn't all the goals
because he also had 200 assists.
They were opening games like
35 to nothing.
And they were so mad.
That's a sport I could watch.
You can talk to me when they're scoring.
Yeah, and Gretzky's
his records are so silly
nothing touches them.
He did Jordan the hockey, huh?
Oh, he's the Jordan.
If Gretzky
had never scored a goal ever,
he would still have more points than the next
up person by a couple hundred because of how many
assists he had.
He never had to score a goal, and he's
the all-time goal-scoring leader.
And I think
he has more assists than
anyone else has goals, too. You just said that. He has more assists than anyone else has goals too.
You just said that.
And he has more goals than anyone has assists.
No, no, he doesn't have more goals than anyone else.
Oh, he doesn't?
Oh, okay.
He's the only – he has almost 900 goals in his career.
The next up person is like 802.
They're thinking Ovechkin might beat him.
Like Ovechkin is the only existing player who's like a better pure goal scorer.
Certainly not Crosby.
But regardless, the whole thing was like,
is it a weird environment to go into a locker room and just know,
just like you were throwing up five touchdowns a game,
every single dude in there was that guy on their team, right?
Like they were all the guy that's like, oh, shit, Tony's here.
Thank God.
Even the kicker.
It's like, just get us the the 50 and then he'll
save us yeah yeah no that was the realization uh when you get to the pros is like everybody's that
dude and and um it was a fun feeling for me when i was young and ambitious because it was like i'm
gonna go show them why i'm that dude right um and so that was like really
motivating for me to continue to work my ass off um but also also humbling right because you see
everybody from different walks of life um from everywhere from shit wisconsin or miami or
california new york and just everybody from from they from they walk of the woods or their neck of the woods um and it was
all killers um it's it's it's that to me that was the beauty of sports that was the beauty of sports
of bringing everybody in the same roof that um had different experiences but still the same
experience did you see I mean obviously does that too I'm sure like you You were fortunate enough, not fortunate, skilled enough
that you were still great amongst NFL guys.
Did you see anybody who was that Titan like you were in a lower level
and then once they got to the bigs, it was like they're a middling guy
and now they're identity crisis almost where it's like,
but I'm supposed to be the best.
Oh, yeah. Oh, you see that all the time that's gotta be hard to your whole life be the tippity top top 0.01 best
and then you join a league where you're actually uh below average like that that's got to be really
hard for your you know self-identification. I think that was the point in my career when I came in as a rookie where I realized, yo, I could be a pro bowler.
I could be a Hall of Famer if I wanted to because I got there and I was like, you're a little intimidated.
You come and it's like, oh shit, there's Andre Johnson.
That's Mario Williams.
These cats are like pro bowlers.
Oh my God. it's like oh shit there's andre johnson that's mario williams like these cats are like pro bowlers oh my god and then you get there and then you watch film and you go to practice and you look
in and you're like nah i can get with these cats like they ain't superman they put their pants on
one leg and it's not just like yeah and then they they obviously have worked to a certain point to
get to where they at so you kind of mimic their work ethic. I remember I pulled Andre Johnson aside. I was like,
how do you work? Because he was like,
I appreciate you pulling me aside because you got talent.
So he kind of showed me how he worked.
And once I
understood the
blueprint, the formula
to do that, I executed
it and then my game took off.
So it's kind of just understanding that
environment of how to be a professional. Because when we think about sports we think about you know going
to twin for our fitness in a pickup game or you know you just kind of just playing around whatever
like like um i took a page out of tiger woods books right is when he would go practice like
look at his schedule like at this when he was balling it was like you know he wakes
up at four and at five in the morning he's he's working on chips and putts or whatever and then
and then from from seven to eight he's working on irons and blah blah we're gonna try and so he
breaks his game down and he works his ass off on on each of those parts of his game working on
swings working on weights all of that stuff and so you realize that you can compartmentalize your game and break your own game down and say, okay, this is my
weakness. I'm going to turn it into a strength. This is my strength. I'm going to continue to
build on that. And once you start thinking of it like a science, rather than I just got to be good
at football, that's when you take your game to the next level. And to be honest, it's everything.
It has little to do with sports and everything to do with anything. If you're in a business, if you're a YouTuber, if you're whatever the case may be,
you say, okay, what am I weak at? Okay, I'm weak at this. So let me study who's good at this
and then add that to my craft. If I do this bad, I'm going to do this. It doesn't matter what you
do. If you break down what you do as a science, it's easy to hit small goals. One of the biggest
gems I've ever got in my life was when my father told me when i was young he said i might have said this on a show
before but he said um he said write your goals down son he said write your goals down and put
them somewhere you can see them every single day right every single day put them somewhere you can
see them uh and and make them make them realistic what do you want to do and so i was like okay i
want to i want to get a college scholarship he's's like, okay, what has to happen in order for you to get a college scholarship?
I got to ball out in high school.
He's like, okay, what do you got to do to ball out in high school?
So I got to start first.
He said, what do you got to do to start?
So I got to be that guy in front of me.
What do you got to do to be that him?
He's like, what is he better at than you?
I said, he's a little faster.
He does this, he does this.
Okay, now we break down of what I need to do, right,
and then do something every single day to get towards that goal on monday i'm gonna run hills tuesday i'm
gonna lift weights wednesday i'm gonna do this thursday i'm gonna do this and it's like it makes
it real like it's not this far-fetched like crazy idea makes it real and he said if you put it down
and you look at it every single day he said one of the two things will happen he said you're gonna
hit somewhere around your goals or you're gonna tear it down because you're getting tired of
looking at it because you're not doing that it was. It was some of the realest shit I've ever came across in my life.
Yeah. Do you do you put a lot of the credit to your dad for instilling stuff like that?
Like kind of kind of putting that thought process in your mind, like that thinking pattern of like, just take it step by step.
What do you need to do this to do this to do like just break it down?
Break it down. Make it simple it structurally yeah yeah it's about
making it simple and yeah i gave him a lot of credit and and and them not having money growing
up really helped out because i just wasn't comfortable man so i was like i just knew i
was i was not gonna be broke interesting because so many times and also probably less distractions
right like like if your dad had a yacht and like he was a bunch of
extracurricular shit was available to you if there was like a playstation at home and a home
and like pool parties every afternoon and like like vacations eight ten times a year that's a
lot of distractions for somebody who's trying to be single-minded about a goal and that's i never
i took one vacation as a kid and we went to,
I grew up in Albuquerque,
New Mexico.
We went to Flagstaff and we drove there for like a weekend.
But other than that,
like we didn't have no money for vacation.
So I only took one vacation.
So like you're a thousand percent right.
Like I was hyper fixated on,
on,
on making this happen.
It's interesting how we're talking about being broke.
I'll quote you.
Growing up has led to your success because oftentimes being wealthy leads to success. You know,
you can have a parent who's achieved something and they show their kids the
way, you know,
on also achieving something or they give them some advantages or maybe they
just have high expectations and those high expectations stop the kid from,
you know, not matching what dad did. and it goes the other way too i guess
yeah no in my opinion it's perspective it's like it's perspective and it's it's environment like
so does your environment cultivate um motivating factors or does your environment cultivate
complacency because there's complacency in poverty for sure it's like oh we here we stuck here it is
what it is i'm gonna work this job until it is like, until I die.
It is what it is. Like that's complacency. Um, uh, I, I, I had a motivation from a career path
that I wanted to have and the motivation was money, but there was a point in time where the
motivation was greatness.
I fell in love with the sport of football,
and I wanted to be great.
I wanted to be Barry Sanders.
I wanted, and that motivated me too,
and so it was like these compounding motivations that continued to push me to be psychotic as a kid with workouts.
Barry Sanders, you said he was my favorite of that era.
Oh, that was my guy.
That was my guy.
Is he your all-time favorite?
Him, Eric Dickerson, and Walter Payton were probably like,
I can't call them a favorite, but like all of them.
Those three were my guys.
Barry Sanders was rich, and he lived in a small house,
like even when he could have had anything.
And somehow that seemed really cool to me.
I didn't know that.
Super humble.
That is cool.
Super humble, man.
Super humble dude.
That's one of the cats when I met. I was like, I met Barry Sanders. Did he live up to expectations? Just tell me he did. seemed really cool to me i didn't know that it was cool super humble man super humble dude that's
one of the cats when i met i was like i met barry sanders did he live up to expectations just tell
me he did i didn't have any expectations for him because he was like super humble like in all the
interviews that he did like they always used to say oh my little league coaches used to be like
be like barry sanders hand the ball to the ref and so that's where i got that from uh it was
when i was a little kid they were always like hand the ball to the ref that And so that's where I got that from. When I was a little kid, they were always like, hand the ball to the ref.
That's what Barry Sanders did.
And because my first touchdown ever, I scored.
I spiked it and got a flag.
I didn't know it was.
Your first one ever?
So stoked.
I was seven, dog.
I was like, why don't you let little kids?
Whatever.
But I was like, yes, hand it to the ref.
It comes from Barry.
And Barry, he was never eccentric.
He was just always even killed
in all of his interviews he just never
it didn't even look like he wanted to play football
somebody like forced him like he's like you gotta do this
because you're amazing he's like alright
is that what he did?
he would always like just hand the ball
no matter how big the touchdown was
no emotion just
I just made probably one of the most athletic
things that you'll ever see in your
life and just has like i don't know it was its own kind of flash it was fucking amazing the guy
would i think i saw him break 11 tackles on a run every single player on the other team touched him
a little he broke all the scores and then afterwards it was like yeah like yeah here you go
glad that's over that was that was what got me
with this whole fucking tom brady argument on twitter when i was drunk somebody was like yo
you're hating tom brady's the greatest athlete of all time i'm like listen hold on listen bro
y'all can say tom brady's the greatest quarterback all the time and we can disagree
on like skill set versus whatever yeah and i i don't think you're stupid when you say that
but when you say tom brady's the greatest athlete of all time't think you're stupid when you say that. But when you say Tom Brady is the greatest athlete of all time,
I think you're a fucking idiot.
That's absurd.
We saw his rookie picture shirtless.
I'm saying, bro.
Yeah, it's fair to say.
That's fair to say.
I was trying to have this conversation a few weeks ago,
right after he won the Super Bowl.
And you're absolutely right.
He's not the greatest athlete of all time.
What I was trying to say was, I like, I think he's the, he's the most, I'm trying
to say he's the most accomplished quarterback of all time, but I just didn't say exactly
that.
Like kidding.
My, my friends are like biting my head off.
Like, do you, who's the fucking swimmer?
Woody helped me out.
They've won everything.
Michael Phelps.
They're like, they're like showing Michael Phelps, like accomplishments.
And I'm like, all right, God damn it.
What are you?
A Phelps fan boy. I didn't, I didn't god damn it. What are you, a Phelps fanboy?
I didn't mean to offend your hero here.
It is a valid position.
If you look at how much he's won, it's outrageous.
I didn't know that he doubled up anyone else
and then decided to add six more,
as far as gold medals are concerned.
He had a long career, too.
Most swimmers have one or two Olympics
that they do really well.
He not only got the most medals per Olympics,
but he was good for three solid Olympics.
You know what?
He's worse by far than the average fish.
I don't know.
I would like to see any $60 fish.
I'm going to take the fish from Dirty's tank.
Oh, no.
I'm taking any fish.
Oh, all right.
So update on that.
He got the new fish.
If you can train it to swim.
What about like a clown fish?
Hold on, Kyle.
What were you saying?
I bet a clown fish could beat him.
They're quick.
Dirty got new fish.
I'm going to go how fast clown fish are.
Hold on. Dirty got new fish on and she killed them all again that's i know well because uh apparently she didn't drain all the water and it kept some of that toxic stuff
for the fish and it just killed the fish again but frankly like if dirty already knew that she
was a shitty fish keeper it's neglectful on his part to have allowed her to do the transition in the first place.
So the blame lies with him.
Fair enough.
Yeah, it does.
Seriously.
If someone just killed all my fish and I bought new fish,
I wouldn't go, hey, set up my fish tank.
Idiot.
I mean, that is fair to say.
But regardless, the fish are all dead again.
Clown fish are not very good swimmers and rarely venture more than two to four inches from the anemone.
Michael Phelps will fuck up a clown fish.
That's more about their motivation than their...
I might take Michael Phelps on the clown fish, man. I don't know.
I'm telling you.
All right, fine. Any other fish. Any other fish that's bigger.
Taylor, you're going too far.
He's like, I'll take a sea urchin over Michael Phelps.
Not that one.
How about a silver dollar?
I mean, like, take an average catfish that destroys Michael Phelps.
Not even close.
I don't know.
I don't know.
They just chill out on the bottom.
No,
but if they want to swim,
they get,
have you ever,
you've caught catfish.
It's got to do laps.
It's just a,
it's just an,
it's just a giant,
it's just a bicep.
The whole thing is just,
but Michael Phelps is big,
right?
Like,
like see,
when you say average fish,
I'm not sure how big an average fish is,
right?
Like an average tuna.
Okay.
You're right. Marlin, undoubtedly, an average tuna? Okay, you're right.
Marlin?
Undoubtedly.
Indubitably.
You're right.
But is an average fish like...
There's a lot of guppies out there.
You know?
There's a lot of tadpoles, if you call them fish.
You know, pre-frogs.
They're this big.
I'll take that 6'7 human over a one inch fish they they measure
fish speed in centimeters per second which may as well be hogwart that means i don't know
there's all kind of articles about like which fish michael phelps can beat
is there some i mean he'd obviously get thrashed by like dolphin sharks, rays, anything large kills him.
Literally and figuratively in the water.
I don't think he's faster than a ray.
What?
Those things can probably go real quick.
They got...
No.
I mean, faster than a man.
Not faster than that man.
If you put me like walking next to Phelps,
and he's going as fast as he can,
I'm taking a leisurely walk as he's going.
I don't know enough to dispute this,
but I'm pretty sure he swims faster than a man.
I don't know enough to make this argument,
but it hasn't stopped me.
I would bet money that he swims faster than a manta ray.
A manta ray?
Yeah, but the manta ray doesn't know
it's racing.
Well, you whoop the manta ray.
How about that? There's a jockey
behind it. Alright, well, how fast?
He can beat most
fish. A manta ray swim.
So this sailfish, I think
they're saying it's one of the fastest.
It's clocked at a maximum speed of
112 kilometers
per hour, dog. Jesus Christ.
That's insane, dog.
That's ludicrous. He said if you do
a 100 meter race, it would complete it in 1.9
seconds. That's fucking crazy.
Holy shit.
He would win that.
To be fair, they live in the water.
They would be shitty at 100 meter depth.
Not so fast off the blocks, though.
Kyle, this is a manta ray.
A manta ray can swim at 14.91
miles per hour.
14 miles an hour?
Which destroys Michael Phelps.
That's a good job.
But what's his reaction time like?
Because he's got to be standing there for a while
until that guy shoots the pistol.
Michael Phelps swims five or six miles per hour.
Five to six miles per hour?
Yeah, he's getting washed.
Slaughtered by this man.
Not even impressed anymore.
Michael Phelps sucks.
Just because he's the best human at that
still shittier than most fish
large sharks tend to swim at one and a half
miles per hour
yeah but they're chilling
they're predators
when they see prey that's imminently
in distress I guarantee
they go a little quicker than a mile an hour
they're 25
there we go.
I refuse to go in the ocean.
Fuck that. Wait, entirely?
The ocean is scary.
There's no reason for me to be in the ocean.
Why would I go in the ocean?
Fuck the ocean.
About waist level is where I'm comfortable in the ocean.
I don't like going deep.
Fuck that.
That's where they get you.
Sharks kill less people than most other things automobile accidents than most other things yeah but when a shark kills you it's the most terrifying thing
ever you ever have a fender bender be like oh that was a little spooky you ever get attacked
by a fucking bull shark getting attacked by a shark is so scary that the people on the beach will have ptsd
bro this is why like if you if you get attacked by a shark it's like a double whammy it's like
two of the worst ways to die like right you literally getting torn apart and you feel all
the pain and you can't breathe they're
doing it underwater so it's like you're drowning yeah and you're getting torn up fuck that i'm not
going to oh yeah you throw in a little fire and you've hit the trifecta you know what i'm saying
fuck man the word i mean like i will say this though one thing that i'd like to do if you guys
are ever up for it um is to go shark fishing like i've got some friends that go down to florida
and they uh they fish for bull sharks in this like um brackish water you know we're not fucking
gonna eat them we're gonna shoot them with a a bow i guess since i'm not allowed to have a gun
you don't fish them oh i'm what you fish them i'm being stupid, right? You fish these sharks.
Yeah, you get them up to the water and then you
murder them.
You get them to the side of the boat and then you
I think you could probably eat them.
I think you could.
Isn't that illegal?
Bull shark is like a bottom feeder.
And it's huge.
So a catfish.
I was about to use that as an example.
That's why a huge catfish tastes worse than a smaller catfish.
I don't know the impact of it being a bottom feeder.
Does that mean you can or can't eat it?
It means that it's not going to taste as good.
Well, then catch a mako.
Yeah, well, then catch it.
I mean, what does mako eat?
Other fish?
I'm not sure.
I just see it on menus a lot.
Getting away from the science of various sharks
i'm saying i'd like to go shark fishing like like like if we can find a shark that taylor
wants to eat apparently that'll be our prime motivating factor taylor's hungry we gotta get
out there it would be fun he's gonna be crabbing the whole time yeah i'll be i'll be uh actually
i'll be conscripting woody's bravery to go crabs for me. And my return offer will be I'll break them all for you.
I'll get your meat out.
That actually sounds pretty good.
And I'll still finish my dinner before anybody else because I'm a wizard when it comes to –
Arian doesn't know.
I am the Arian Foster of football when it comes to eating crab.
I destroy crab.
I mean, I'm like a fucking concert pianist with these fingers.
Can you do lobster?
I mean, you don't really have to do lobster
because you just eat the tail
for the most part.
The little spindly arms on lobster,
very little meat in those things.
I found out last
year that I had a shellfish allergy.
Is it new
or was it your first time having it?
I've never been
allergic to anything you're a funny story it's a funny story it was funny to me so like when i get
booked for like speaking engagements like i really don't uh like dig into what i'm talking i'm pretty
good at public speaking so i don't dig into what i'm talking about until i'm there right and so
that that week i had booked a speaking engagement i was was going to leave on a Friday to go talk.
And so my man's booked it.
I was like, all right, bet.
So that Thursday night I order the same shit I've got from Benihana since I was fucking can remember ordering Benihana's.
I get the shrimp and the chicken hibachi.
And so that night I eat it and I go to bed.
I eat it like at 1030.
I wake up and I'm like itching.
It's not regular itching.
It's pain.
I'm in pain.
And I had got a massage that day, so I was like, maybe the oil she used, I'm having a reaction to.
Went and took a shower.
Still, nothing would get away with it.
So I was like itching like a motherfucker.
Woke up, my lips were swollen as fuck, like swollen.
I was like, yo, what is this?
I have no idea what this is. Went to the doctor, and he was like, oh, you got a shellfish allergy. I was like, what is this i have no idea what this is
went to the doctor and i was like oh you got a shellfish out of you and i was like what
shellfish that's crazy i've never been allergic to anything in my life i've been eating shrimp
and lobster and all that for i don't know how long so the next day i was like okay i still
got a speaking engagement to go to i go and uh so i land and i'm still lips still a little swollen
a little numb uh so i land him up and i meet my are still a little swollen, a little numb.
So I land and I meet my mans in a hotel lobby.
And he's like, okay, beat downstairs at seven.
And everybody was like, okay, just let me know just so I know like what we talked about.
He's like, oh, you're speaking at a food conference and it's about kids with food allergies.
And I was like, you gotta be fucking shitting me.
I was like, you gotta be kidding me, dog.
What kind of movie script is that?
And so I went and I told that story.
I was like, yo, y'all think I'm going to be playing right now, but let me tell you what happened.
And so I'm meeting all these kids, and this is crazy.
I'm meeting all these kids who have peanut allergies or any kind of allergies.
They deal with the craziest shit, really life-threatening situations that I have never even thought of because I've never been allergic to anything. This kid was telling me all this stuff he can't eat.
He's like, yeah, if I do, my
throat swells and I can't breathe. I have to
stab myself with an EpiPen. I'm like, Jesus fucking
Christ, dog. I would have never been that empathetic
if I wouldn't the day before.
I'd have been like, that sucks, bro.
You should probably stay away from nuts.
That's a funny-ass story,
huh?
I got a question.
Two, three days ago, I'm doing a squat and I failed. I'm in a squat rack. It's made you better. That's a funny ass story, huh? Yeah. I got a question. All right. So two,
three days ago, I'm doing a squat and I failed. All right. I'm in a squat rack. It's no big deal.
Everything's cool. Afterwards, I kind of like processed it and I'm like,
honestly, don't know if my legs gave out or if my like enthusiasm quit, you know, like,
like maybe I was okay with not getting up again.
And then I'm like, does that even make a difference on what failed?
I mean, if it was easy for me, I would have succeeded.
I don't know if it's tougher mentally.
What do you think about training to failure?
Sometimes it's simple.
You just can't do another curl.
Sometimes it's complicated.
Could I have if I tried harder you've trained it depends it depends on if um so training to fail could actually be a part of
your set right so like we do that like sure things are like dips or bench or something like that
we're like okay on your last set, go to failure.
You just pump it out until you can't do it anymore.
Usually not with squats.
Yeah, you don't want to do it with squats because it hurts and shit.
It could have been,
it depends on how much weight you had, it could have been
a failure.
You're probably squatting wrong. The majority of people squat
wrong. People squat and they think it's all thighs.
They think it's legs. You got to squat with your butt,
with your glutes. You got to tighten it up legs it's like you gotta squat with your butt with your glutes you gotta like tighten it up that's where you get all
your power from but um i think it could i i have it all the time now when i work out when i work
out now my motivation when i used to work out and i played was like i gotta get this thing nobody's
gonna outwork me so i used to do extra reps and extra sets but now i'm like i'll skip out on a
couple sets and reps here if i'm not feeling it because it's like i'm not what am sets but now i'm like i'll skip out on a couple sets and reps here if i'm
not feeling it because it's like i'm not what am i here for i'm here for a beach body i'm not here
to try to be the strongest guy in the world like i don't care about that so it's like sometimes
sometimes he's dang it is what it is man if you're just looking to be fit and aesthetically pleasing
yeah going with like the hypertrophy, like,
you know, just building muscle over like raw strength makes the most sense.
Like longest time.
I didn't think that.
And then it was like,
you know what?
Like,
like you see like a power lifter with a big belly be like,
yeah.
And that guy,
that bodybuilder,
he can't even deadlift seven 80.
It's like,
yeah,
but he looks awesome he's also strong enough to do anything on he
doesn't accidentally have a huge upper body that can handle any day-to-day task that he needs that
mother trucker two cases of water i know i know kyle and it's only like eight months ago that i
started fully listening you're you're a wise man it's not like if you get if you get like ripped it's not it'll
be hard to be weak and ripped right just relative to strength training you're probably not gonna be
the strongest but like you you like anybody approach you on the street the majority of them
you'll be able to handle them like you'll be all right but for but for just
aesthetic purposes like there's no like you shouldn't be squatting fucking 400 pounds bro
there's no reason like oh wow i bet that bodybuilder can only flat bench uh 280 or i'm sorry
380 uh not like the power lifter guy with the huge fat gut who can bench you know 5'10 where it's like have you seen those bench press
shirts where they want are you talking about the ties where it comes like right here the ones the
ones that are like so tight they're like you can't even like stand normally yeah they add like a
hundred fucking pounds to your bench yeah because all it does is it it basically turns it from a bench press into like a racking just a just like a tricep push where it's
like all locked in and your arms can't move and so it's like oh you're just you're doing a machine
lift with uh we can all unrack a tremendous amount of weight right that's the easy part
and when you've got that shirt on or the slingshot or whatever then uh the actual bench
is assisted and you're just sort of focusing on the rack part a little more i'm exaggerating but
yeah it's like a spring like like put like you can't pull your arms down to the position without
the weight of the of the of the bar right so like it's it's assisting like 80 80 100 pounds or
something like that i want to bench like that that's what i'm, 100 pounds or something like that. I want a bench like that.
That's what I'm going to – I'm going to bench like that,
call that my new max, and never tell anyone.
I looked at what those shirts cost.
I was curious because I heard some YouTuber talking about them.
Like I think maybe Greg Doucette was talking about bench press records
and how he had all these bench press records
and how like the way bench press is done is bullshit.
And he mentioned a bench press shirt.
I never even heard of such a thing. And I was was like i looked on amazon they're expensive as fuck like
several hundred dollars whoa wow yeah greg just said this video was great taylor so here's the
deal i guess the rules are you have to like have your fingers on uh one of the what is the break and knurling called that mark
those little rims i don't know what they're called either but yeah you put your pinky or
your ring finger on there so what they do is they put their hands wider than that but they reach
over like super far so they are technically touching it right so with the super wide grip
that's step one two arch your back a ton.
You're not trying to do a bench press here.
You're trying to get your nipples three feet in the air
so that you don't have to do a bench press.
And then they're able to like unrack it a little bit,
touch their chest by moving the bar down like four inches,
and then push it back up.
And they've arched their back so much,
the range of motion is literally like four inches.
And that's how you set a bench press record nowadays and it's what they teach you um when you're coming out for the combine and you have to do that bench press thing that's what they
they teach you they teach you to put your feet all the way back to arch your chest up and and
arch your back to where you minimize the the amount of length that you have to actually push
yeah so that's like that's like them taking something that was actually good advice at you minimize the amount of length that you have to actually push.
So that's like them taking something that was actually good advice at some point where it's like, hey, if you want to activate your chest more, you know, kind of and go like
this.
And everyone's like, actually, get rid of that good advice, awful advice that will help
your number look better while you're still remarkably weaker than the person doing it
correctly like that. Yes. Yeah. If you're training training for a beach body then obviously that's not the way
to go but if you're trying to break a record i see how it works the woman that broke this record
my god she could arch her back like a like a circus performer almost it was ridiculous their
arm isn't even like fully down it's like touch yeah not even exaggerating
it's this much range of motion it's two and a half to three and a half inches she she she
unracks it she comes down like she comes down so little it's almost like when you're bench pressing
and you kind of waver a little bit like you kind of wiggle the bar a little and that was the full
thing like like it and and i don't remember how much weight it was.
Obviously, it was a small woman.
Like she probably weighed 130 pounds.
So she might have had 180 pounds or something like that.
That's a huge amount of weight for 130 pounds.
It's a huge amount.
It's a world record.
It's something like that.
But looking at it, you're like, I bet if you had to do it the right way.
I bet if we strapped your back to the fucking bench down flat,
you could do 120.
Have you ever watched Brad Shaw's YouTube channel?
Yes.
He,
dude,
can I talk about Brad Shaw for a second?
I love that guy.
So if people don't know,
Brad Shaw is a,
uh,
he's a world strong man champion.
He's a really good.
Is he won seven times?
Something like that.
Like he's won four times.
Okay.
But unlike a lot of those guys, he's 6'8 and weighs 420 pounds.
Wait, unlike him?
Yeah, he's a monster.
He's super big.
He's super strong.
And as a guy who walks into every movie theater and could just muscle anyone else who's there,
you would think that he's like aware
of that or like he is so humble and so sweet he always seems to just want good things for everybody
and when you take that like kind heart and put it in the strongest package a man has ever achieved
it's a neat little like unexpected kindness yeah he's he's really cool but uh so i
was watching on my stream taylor murka on twitch if anyone wants to check me out i was watching
this was about a week ago there's a show called the strongest men in the world or the strongest
men on earth and it was like bradshaw um eddie hall and a couple of other strongmen robert oberst
who's the guy from Joe Rogan,
who was like, hey, if you're not training to be the best deadlift guy on Earth,
stop fucking deadlifting.
The ROI for an average lifter is terrible.
Most people won't tell you that.
He's the guy who said that.
And then they have this guy named Nick, who's like 50 years old,
and he's the biggest 50-year-old on Earth.
He's just huge.
Does he look good or just fat?
No, he looks great.
And then they do challenges where it's like,
hey, there's a myth that some guy named Sven Mjörgisbord lifted.
He did a squat with 2,200 pounds on it,
but instead of weights, he had himself on a bar
and then nine people on each side, and then he did that.
And they're like, well, we're going to give it a go.
And then they do that and they're like well we're gonna give it a go and like and then they do that they try it and like i like that they don't buy into the nonsense where
it'll be like now this episode we're trying out you know we're gonna match the wyoming strong man
you know coyote willie or whatever the fuck and they're like now the myth is is that he threw a
sandbag that weighed 490 pounds over his, held it near his chest and walked.
I'm the strongest man on earth, and that's absurd.
He didn't do that.
What we're going to do is we're going to go, I don't know,
what do you guys say, 325?
We'll do that.
We'll do that.
That was too easy.
Let's do 370.
Okay.
And then it gets to the point where it's like breaking his record,
and he's like, well, the only way we're able to do this is that I'm 6'8",
and I'm the strongest man alive, i've eaten you know 10 000 chickens
over the course of my lifetime and that's why i'm able to be like this it's awesome it's one of them
it's a good show eddie hall who's eddie hall is six foot three and standing next to eddie or i'm
sorry brian jaw he looks so small like He looks hobbit built, but it's
just because he's as wide as a house.
They're like Jujie and Tom.
They were doing
one
challenge where they had
a barbell and a ton of shit, obviously
weights on either side.
It was just a one-arm raise
because the myth was that someone was able
to one-arm raise something that weighed 410 pounds. Then it turned just a one arm raise because the myth was that someone was able to one arm raise something that weighed 410 pounds.
And then it turned into a goal from,
cause it's,
it starts up here and all they have to do is get it off.
Like they just have to get both sides off at the same time.
They got Eddie Hall did that with 520 pounds where he just stood under it.
And he goes,
like,
you got it. and he goes like you got it like he's about to die and then like
you see that part of the video and then it cuts to like the post reality show
interview where it's like yeah I thought I was gonna fucking die right there it was pretty
he goes Brad I'm sorry the mountain
or no no Bradshaw he's like I got the heaviest deadlift in history.
It was horrible.
I went blind for about three minutes afterward.
He burst so many trying to do it that he went blind for a bit.
Like it's,
and it's so cool watching these strong men because their level of strength is
like it. I mean, so level of strength is like it.
I mean, so much of it is obviously genetic, but the hard work they put in where I remember I was watching one and it was showing Brian Shaw warm up for a deadlift attempt.
And it said seven hundred and eighty five pounds by five warm up weight.
Dude, I I watch Brian Shaw's gym, right?
He's buying new dumbbells and his dumbbells go up to like 275.
And I'm like, man, these 15-inch pythons are saving me a lot of money.
Because those weights are like $12,000, $15,000.
I don't have those.
And because he's like 6'8", 6'9", his hands are the size of a fucking dinner plate.
And so like then he does like those grip challenges.
And he's so humble about it where he's like, does anybody want to try my grip blocks?
It's just a piece of iron that weighs like 105 pounds.
That's hard to grab.
And all these other strong men are in his gym like, dude, I can't get it.
And he's like, all right, guys, I'll show you how to do it.
It's not fair, though, because I've had practice,
and you guys just came in here fresh, but let me do it with my right.
All right, let me do my left.
So, like, okay, so that's how you would do it
if you guys were physically capable.
He always does it so kind, right?
And when someone else does an impressive lift that he could double up,
he's like, that's awesome. Good for you, for you man you're killing it i'm so proud like he's a very uplifting guy i like brian shaw a lot i like that so much in these guys juji is good that way too i
cut y'all hair yeah um tom will be flexing right and tom And Tom got thin. He gets back, would look good. And he's like, you look so great.
That's massive.
Meanwhile, he's tripled the width of this guy.
But he's just super encouraging.
And he seems to genuinely want good things for the people around him.
It's cool.
Yeah, he deadlifted like a Chevy Tahoe.
And then telling people how happy he is with their results.
So, yeah. Brian Shaw,
recommendation of the week.
Shaw strength. He's a great guy.
Aaron, I got a thing for you.
Dwayne Wade
was talking about Jordan Clarkson.
Do you know either of these people?
Know who they are?
For people who aren't Aaron,
Dwayne Wade, basketball player,
retired, very good, Hall of Famer.
And I was going to say top 50 ever.
I'm not even sure if that's accurate, but he's very, very, very good.
Oh, it's definitely accurate.
Top 25, easily.
Okay.
And then Jordan Clarkson.
He plays for Utah right now.
I would call him the leading six-man-of-the-year candidate.
So this is what Dwayne Wade said.
He says, I want to be Jordan Clarkson. If he werene Wade said. He says, I want to be Jordan Clarkson.
If he were to come back into the NBA, I want to be Jordan Clarkson.
Come off the bench, shoot anytime I want, ultra green light,
dress fly as hell, go home and chill.
He's like, I don't want to be an NBA superstar
because those guys, they break their knees
and wear out their knees and stuff like that.
Do you think he's on to something there?
Is the ideal position in pro sports not to be the superstar
where they have to do so much gosh darn work,
but to be like a good six-man in basketball
or maybe the guy who carries the football second most in football?
They get rich.
They dress fly as hell and go home and chill,
and they don't have all the pressure that you know like say you did yeah i mean i definitely understand what he means
um like i remember um like when i was a rookie i didn't have obviously the prestige nor the um
responsibilities uh that i did when i was a starter and i was like a perennial
pro bowler a lot of attention on you a lot of pressure on you press getting written about you
all the time your name's always in the papers like you kind of like are representative of the city
that you play in right and so you kind of have all this extra stuff to work on um and it takes a toll like i remember before games um like this gut-wrenching
anxiety like that i had because it's just like so much preparation so much like can go wrong
like it's a physical sport like it's just it's just gut-wrenching and once once the ball snap
you get hit once it kind of goes away but um i know i know what he means is that feeling of like
that constant pressure of the public is always
on you and organization riding on
you and you feel
it
yeah I mean I definitely can
relate
it was easier playing when
nobody knew who I was and I just show up
to work get a paycheck go home
enjoy my family I could walk in the mall
nobody noticed me.
It was a cool life, yeah, for sure.
I know what he means, for sure.
In fewer minutes?
All those carries you got?
I mean, I don't know.
You seem to be doing really well physically,
but a lot of NFL players, they limp.
Who's the quarterback that 185 with the bears
jim mcmahon right apparently jim mcmahon can't put on his own deodorant just he's been hit in
the arms too many times his shoulders are bad you know that's part of the price of being the man
yeah yeah i mean i feel some of those residual effects all the time. Like if, if I'm doing something, uh, like, like my knees, like my knee right now, if,
if, if I lay it down in a certain position and I extend it, like it'll get caught and
I get it and I have to like move it and then extend it or else it'll like, I'll probably
tear a meniscus or something like that.
But it's like, it locks.
Yeah.
Like locks, um, that like my back shit right now now sitting down, my back is killing me right now.
It's just a part of my shoulder, like my shoulder every now and then.
Like if I reach for something, it feels like it slips out of place,
but it just feels like this excruciating pain on the rotator cuff.
Neck right here, I had a pinched nerve when we played Detroit 2012.
neck right here.
I had a pinched nerve when we played Detroit 2012.
If I get a massage or something,
if I'm like this, if my chin is to my
chest, I can touch it
like this. But if I'm looking up and you touch a certain
part of my neck, it sends a sharp
pain down. It's a pinched nerve.
And so
that definitely got residual
shit everywhere.
Can you fix any of that or you just
gotta deal with it uh i think the the back can probably be fixed but it'll just be fixed and
it'll be just kind of prolonging i'll probably always have pain my shoulder probably always
have pain my knee can probably be fixed um i'm unsure about the pinched nerve though i think
like i think that you can rehab some of that stuff, but surgery might be an option.
It just depends on where it's pinched and how, you know, it surrounds the rest of the nerves.
Because, like, if you go into surgery and they snip the wrong shit, like, you're fucking going to be paralyzed somewhere.
Yeah.
So it's not really nothing to play with.
But, like, shit like that is just part of it.
I mean, not to mention, like, the emotional and the the mental toll right like so i noticed um probably
two three years after i played i would have these like intense like mood swings and it wasn't like
i'm not violent or anything like that but i can i noticed a difference like where i i i feel like
i'm just not happy like Like, I'm upset.
Like, and there's nothing that did it, and it's just I'm upset.
And I can't 100% say it's like a CTE kind of thing,
but probably I've had many concussions in my career.
But it's like I notice it.
And luckily the lady I was with at the time, she noticed it too,
and I was like, okay, we can work together. So when I'm in that mood, she's like, is it how? i was like okay we could work together like so when i'm in that mood she's like is it how i was like yeah just leave me alone and so like she would
leave me alone and go away in a couple hours but it's like you can kind of feel the the switch
emotionally and luckily enough i'm cognizant of it like some people might not be yeah well you
barely got out in time then. That could have been horrible.
To not be able to know it's coming or at least
be able to externalize your
knowledge that it's here.
It's happening. Get away.
When that happens,
is there
some sort of... I'm putting myself
in that. Sometimes when I
am a dick, I'm not wrong.
I'm just overreacting to a minor thing.
You know, like that's my wife's conversational style.
She sometimes starts in the middle of a thing, you know.
So she'll open up with like, so she's running late.
And I'm like, all right, for the millionth time,
who is she in this scenario?
And why did you think I would know?
You're not being unreasonable.
You gotta start stories at the beginning.
That's how stories work.
I do that shit all the time.
That's what Joey would fucking do.
The subject. What the fuck are we
talking about? Yeah, I started
teaching her about direct objects.
Part of what an i could be
and uh she didn't appreciate the lesson you know like like i could do it right here well
the workbook didn't help how did how did you deliver this message to her about the direct
objects or the other we are jackie and you're delivering this message of direct objects
We are Jackie and you're delivering this message of direct objects.
I gave an example.
I was like, you know, whatever.
President Biden's running late today and he is angry.
He is supposed to be Biden in this scenario. You can't just make he somebody else without introducing a new focus of the same sense.
A subject. A new subject.
And I'm...
Literally,
it's like that. It's like, he is supposed
to be the focus. Why don't people...
How can you not know this? How am I supposed
to follow along? And she's like, everybody else
does. And I'm like... And the next thing I know,
I'm just raining blows down
on her, and I'm the bad guy.
You are the good guy in this scenario.
I would be annoyed by this, too.
And he said, what's happening?
A better version of me would be like, wait a minute.
Biden was late?
Or whatever it is I just said.
The best version of me would be like who are we talking about?
Kind of calmly but instead it's like
here we go again.
You started the story
in the middle.
You got to turn it around on her.
He doesn't like when you talk that way.
What you have to do
is just gaslight your wife.
Until she agrees see that's what jeremy would always do he would start right in the middle and and like he'd be he'd say something like uh did you hear
i hate that did i hear what did you hear what he did? Did I hear what who did?
Billy.
Billy who?
I don't know any Billys.
What are you doing to me right now?
We've got a fucking guessing game.
Are we playing right now?
So I got to the point where he would just,
did you hear?
I just go, yeah, I heard.
Go back to whatever I was doing.
So where I was headed.
I'm doing this because it upset both of you.
It's not that I'm wrong.
It's that my reaction didn't fit this minor slight, right?
Like, you know, I'm here giving lessons in fricking sixth grade English and,
uh, you know, getting high pitched.
Great.
You said upset over is something where it would have been better to just,
you know, like, Hey, here we are again.
Come on, baby.
You're like that Snickers commercial.
You're not yourself when you're hungry.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So anyway, I was saying, Aaron, when you thought you might have had some like CTE aggression issues,
did it play along those same lines where like you were faulted in some minor way and your reaction was off target?
Or was it literally out of nowhere?
It's a little bit of both.
Where usually like in I would never like I used to have the same conversation with my ex.
Where it's like, like, bro, who is he, bro?
Like you got to start with the subject or I don't know what we're talking about.
Maybe the real takeaway is women can't tell stories.
I mean, I don't know what we're talking about maybe the real takeaway is women can't tell stories i mean i don't disagree with that but uh it was more so like um like those kind of things that would be it would be playful i never really took it seriously but when i'm in
that space when i'm in that head space it can go bad to where i'm like the fuck are you saying
like what is what do you mean like that kind of shit where it's like i'm popping off i don't mean to pop off and i think that is what that disease actually does is it it
eliminates your like your rationale the the faculties of empathy and then your the consequences
of what your actions are it actually like kind of erodes those for the time being and and it just
it it just it just doesn't allow you to, to, to calculate the response that, that you may get from what you say. And it, everything is just frustrating too. It's like nothing, nothing makes you happy. Nothing is happy. So it's like, you just get in these spaces where you're like, bro, fuck that shit. And I don't like who I am when I'm around, like when I'm like that. So like, I kind of, I noticed it. And so I kind of removed myself from society when that happens.
Sometimes I, I know Taylor it's ad time, but sometimes it's like, uh,
like one thing I'd like from you is to have better timing, right?
You're asking for a new car or whatever the hell it is.
My family wants from me now. And, uh, and it's like,
you can see I'm having a rough time right now.
Why don't you come back later?
I would like it.
If you finessed me a little more,
if you hit me with these,
when I was having a good time,
woo me.
Yeah.
It's just like,
can't you work me a little?
I think that's better for everyone involved.
But anyway, that's a real
thing though like communication in any relationship is is hella key that i've learned as a 34 year old
man that i wish i had younger but it's like really expressing how you feel is fucking important
like little things like that could blow up and and you fucking don't have a friend anymore just because
y'all weren't clear on how y'all felt.
Something made you feel.
Our society
doesn't cultivate that. Our society doesn't
cultivate, like, yo, say what
you feel. Express how you feel in a way
that is diplomatic
to salvage the situation.
It's just this me, me, me attitude
that we enjoy
the reward, actually.
Our society is be angry and indignant
about it until both
people agree even harder
on their side at the end of the discussion.
When's the last time
you got angry enough in public
to raise your voice to a stranger?
Hold on. This is potentially funny,
so before we jump to that,
we're going to hear from a couple of wonderful sponsors.
Admit it. You think
that cybercrime is something that happens to
other people. You think that no one wants your data
or that hackers can't grab your passwords
or credit card details, but you would be wrong.
Stealing data from unsuspecting people
on public Wi-Fi is one of the simplest and
cheapest ways for hackers to make money.
When you leave your internet connection unencrypted, you might as well be writing your passwords and Thank you. by encrypting your data and hiding your public IP address. ExpressVPN has easy-to-use apps that run seamlessly in the background of your computer, phone, and tablet.
Turning on ExpressVPN takes a single click, just one click.
Using ExpressVPN, I can safely surf on public Wi-Fi without being snooped on or having my personal data stolen.
For less than $7 a month, you can get the same ExpressVPN protection that I have and Woody and Kyle.
We all have it.
ExpressVPN is rated the number one VPN service by TechRadar
and comes with a 30-day money-back guarantee.
Protect your online activity today
and find out how you can get three months free at expressvpn.com.
That's E-X-P-R-E-S-S, vpn.com.
For three months free with a one-year package,
visit expressvpn.com.
To learn more and get that three months free with a one-year package visit expressvpn.com slash pka to learn more
and get that uh three months free with a one-year package when you use the code pka so
check that out or not the code rather the slash pka uh this episode of pka is also
brought to you by blue chew do not that's not part of the read. Say it with, yeah. This episode of the day is brought to you by Blue Chew.
Say it with us, Blue Chew.
Blue Chew is making waves and bringing more confidence to the bedroom
by offering chewable tablets that can help men get stronger
and longer-lasting erections.
Blue Chew is a unique online service that delivers the same active ingredients
as Viagra and Cialis, but in chewable form and at a fraction of the cost.
Blue Chew's tablets help men achieve harder, stronger erections to combat all forms of ED.
Blue Chew is an online prescription service, so no visit to the doctor's office, no awkward
conversations, and no waiting in line at the pharmacy. And it ships right to your door in
a discreet package. No one will know. It says custom medicine. No one will know.
The process is simple.
Sign up at bluechew.com,
consult with one of their licensed medical providers,
and once you're approved,
you'll receive your prescription within days.
The best part, it's all done online.
Blue Chew is, or I'm sorry,
Blue Chew's licensed medical providers work with you to find the right ingredient
and strength for your prescription.
Don't like swallowing pills?
No problem there.
Blue Chew's sildenafil and tadalafil tablets are chewable.
BlueChew's tablets are made in the USA, and they prepare and ship direct,
so it's cheaper than a pharmacy.
So if you could benefit with extra confidence when it's time to perform,
visit bluechew.com for more details and important safety information.
And we've got a special deal just for our listeners.
Try BlueChew free when you use our promo code PKA at checkout.
Just pay the $5 in shipping.
That's bluechew.com, promo code PKA at checkout. Just pay the $5 in shipping. That's BlueChew.com
promo code PKA to receive your first month
free. And we thank BlueChew for
sponsoring the podcast. Wonderful,
wonderful sponsor. We love them.
Fantastic. The best. Absolutely the best.
Thank you so much, BlueChew.
So get yourself a hard dick.
BlueChew.com slash
or I'm sorry, code PKA.
Just pay the $5 in shipping.
You don't want to lose money on this, guys.
So take advantage of it.
Check them out.
Two great sponsors.
Tremendous.
Did you guys have a thing?
I do, if not.
Go for it.
I got to pee.
Is Arian a good listener?
We had the question I asked.
Oh, yeah.
We were just talking about something taylor's gone
i'll we'll circle back i'm gonna write it down it was what did you ask kyle
what was the last time you yelled at another stranger in public yeah i think taylor has a
thing so i'll wait arian football thing was hannah i used to play ice hockey.
It had nobody beer league,
North Carolina level.
It's like the worst.
But anyway,
I was fast and I didn't think that I was fast because I was like,
my top speed was that much better than everybody's.
I was fast because I use that top speed all the time.
Other players got lazy.
Other players didn't always
sprint every play. And I did. Hockey, by the way, has a lot of substitutions. Is that true in the
NFL level? Like, were you, are you fast? Are players fast? Because if it was like a one-time
track effort, they'd be faster? Or is it because in the second half of the game, they're still going that
fast? Or they're able to tap into their
full effort every time? What makes
fast? Does that question work?
You're talking about
in football? Yeah.
Football is different
from a track speed. There's a lot of
track guys that suck at
football and a lot of football guys that are horrible on track.
It's the combination of two things.
It's understanding angles and it's speed endurance.
You're dealing with speed endurance in football to where it's, can I be fast for four quarters?
That's where it's like everybody might be four four four three in quarter one
quarter four when the game is going on some guy you four nine four eight now because your legs
is heavy but some guy might be four five because he's he has a little bit more speed endurance
and so um that's what you go that's what you it's what you aim for you train for speed endurance and
long uh standing speed That's cool.
Yeah, I think Barry Sanders, not Barry Sanders, I meant to say Emmitt Smith was good that way.
He seemed to think the fourth quarter was his because he was the same player then.
Most running back.
Yeah, most elite running backs.
You're really good with speed endurance.
You can keep up your average for for a long period of time
okay well i don't know i was thinking about that how often do y'all get up outside of this
podcast what does that mean oh meet up in person yeah post uh pre-covid pre-covid
we were at a spot there where we met probably once a year ish and then it hasn't
happened in a while uh pal has travel restrictions on him right now that's part of it covid is yeah
i'm i'm kind of restricted to like the northern part of georgia i can i can get permission to
like stray a little bit like like you know go like two, three hours from my house, but that's a whole process that I've got to
file some paperwork and shit for. I just did it. I just went to North Carolina the other
day for the first time in two, three years or something like that.
It's not even the state of Georgia. It's my region in Georgia.
How long are these restrictions on you?
That's funny. You should ask.
Is there an update?
199 days,
2 hours, 16 minutes, and 37
seconds.
35,
34, 33.
199 days.
Alright.
It's coming.
That's wild. that's why do you that's why did oh angry in public didn't a guy yell it dirty is this a story that we can tell on the show yeah yeah yeah so um
yeah yeah uh i'm a little foggy on exactly what happened but i was sitting right there it
was just a little confusing because everybody has masks and it's sometimes it's hard to like tell
exactly what they're saying exactly who you're talking to so we i went to north carolina to
harris cherokee casino over the weekend for a couple days with a couple of the 50 patrons
went with dirty went with fish We had a great fucking time.
Dirty and I were playing low stakes Texas Hold'em.
We were playing $1, $2.
Everybody's sitting there with $200 in front of them.
That's what you start with.
After a while, some guys have $500, $600.
There's a decent amount of money on the table.
Dirty's right to my left, and there's a guy across from me.
He's an older guy, maybe 55, and he's lost a lot.
He's probably down $600 or something like that in an hour,
and he gets up and he leaves, and I think he's leaving.
But he comes back with more money.
He comes back with another $100, $200 worth of chips.
And the way I remember it uh dirty beat him again and took all of his money again and dirty laughed and uh he wasn't laughing at the the fact that he beat
the guy the guy was like sucked on sucked out on me again on the fucking river which means like the
last card that's dealt you know the five cards get dealt out their me again on the fucking river which means like the last card that's dealt
you know the five cards get dealt out their community cards and the last one made dirty
the winner and uh dirty kind of laughed at that really more more than anything just kind of
laughing it off like yeah that's poker and this guy's like you little cocksucker you laughing
and he's just like so mad and it was just like oh this guy's actually mad
the dealer's like giving him like the evil eye they just had thrown somebody out of the casino
for doing like the exact same thing like like cursing at another player um but the old guy
got up and and left but yeah he sort of he the way i remember dirty is the one that took his money it
could have been that somebody else took it and uh and that dirty was just laughing about it but in any case this guy got up cursed a little
bit at dirty and uh and stormed off i was wondering that's actually what made me think about it because
if people don't know dirty's $50 patreon i've spent hours and hours with him i like him i really do but his his style is to poke at people you know he teases
uh if you poke at him you better be good at it because he is and and you know i i i've lost every
verbal battle with him so far i'm oh and whatever and uh uh so i was like i wonder if dirty just made fun of him talk smack to him or something
like that not straight no not really no everybody's dirty's really uh talking about the poker table
like he's super friendly like he's trying to get everybody involved in like a conversation and he's
kind of he's like he's like giving people nicknames and stuff and uh just being super friendly and
sociable like like way more like talkative and sociable than i
am and i'm talking a lot at the table too i i always do and he's he's like he's like i said
he's giving people nicknames he's like all right you come on irish the guy's got like a irish flag
for his mask now he's irish and like real friendly guy i had a good time with dirty dirty's a big
enough dick uh there at the harris cherokee casino that he called ahead and they, uh, they gave us a free room and the rooms
are like $500 a night. So, but, but you know, it was a good time. I had, I had a lot of fun.
I was real bummed out cause with COVID the buffet is closed and in casinos they have really nice,
like all you can eat buffets and they were gonna be crab legs. And I was like, Oh,
all you can eat crab legs for $35. That sounds legs and i was like oh oh you can eat crab legs for 35 that sounds like a great deal and then but they're fucking closed
but yeah that gentleman shouted and got super pissed off and i was thinking like
i think maybe the last time that i can remember like yelling at somebody in public i was with you
and it was that fucking like airport shuttle driver that wanted to hit you up for like
15 or 20 more dollars or something like that.
When you,
when you had already paid in some manner beforehand,
but he just wasn't aware.
It was a real misunderstanding.
He thought you were cheapskating him,
like skipping out on your bill.
You obviously aren't.
And he's like putting his foot in the elevator door so
woody and i can't go up to our rooms and it's just like motherfucker i'm about to beat your
ass in this nice ass la hotel you put your fucking old ass foot out of this goddamn i'm
woody's not nearly as mad as i am yeah oh he was gonna take a real asshole
was that the line you were breaking out like is that what you want to do today lose a fight in an elevator pretty much but at the same time like what am i
doing is that what i want to do today start a fight in the elevator because like well you gotta
but i like even even thinking about it like like i'm still mad i kind of wish we kicked that guy's
ass it's a weird thing i think what he gave him the money. I did. Yeah.
Yeah. Was this pre or post
lockup, dog? Oh, this
is a while ago. It might have been eight years ago.
I was about to say, well, you made a good decision
there, man. It was years ago.
I had
one when
I think this might be one of the only times
I've ever yelled at somebody in public I didn't know.
It was recent. It was 2019.
We were at some brunch spot, and we was having a nice time.
We were sitting right by. The register was right here, and right behind it was the cooks.
We were sitting right here. Some dude comes up, and
the waiter, the lady, is bringing somebody else's
food out. He comes up to her and stops her right in front of us.
And the chef was like, who made this?
And she was like, excuse me?
She's like, who made this?
And she's like, I mean, there's a hair in it.
This is ridiculous.
I can't believe this shit.
He's like, why are you going off on this lady?
And I was sitting there.
I was like, bro, I'm about to beat this dude's ass.
Not the way to do this.
This is ridiculous. He's like, take it back. I want something else. And I just snapped. I was like, bro, I'm about to beat this dude's ass. Not the way to do this. This is ridiculous. He's like,
take it back. I want something else.
I snapped. I was like, hey, bro.
No. We're not going to do that.
No. No. I said, you
take that shit somewhere else, dog. He just looked at me
and just walked
off. Good for you. That's rude as fuck.
I was ready to fight him because
nobody wakes up and wants to fuck up your food, fam.
It was an accident. Just be kind and they'll fix it, bro.
Don't be an asshole.
Yeah, they'll take the hair off and give it back.
I've ate food with hair in it before, man.
I don't actually share the general.
Some people think hair is the grossest thing in the world.
What is hair?
I'll lick your hair.
I don't give a fuck.
As long as it's not a pubic hair, let's go.
I don't even know if it is. I'll take it out. I don't want you to lick my hair. I'll lick your hair. I don't give a fuck. As long as it's not a pubic hair, let's go. I don't know even if I take it out.
I don't want you to lick my hair.
That's a decision
that I make, Taylor. That tells you a story about
I found a tooth in my pizza.
A tooth?
A tooth? A real deal
human tooth.
Alright, so.
How do you lose a tooth
and not know?
Alright, so. I'll tell you so um we had ordered what was it it was dominoes and we ordered dominoes and we was watching it we're watching a fight fighting
everybody was there and it was chilling i was like on my second or third piece
and i take a bite and all of a sudden i feel a tooth and i'm like what
the fuck and i look and there's a tooth sitting on i'm like you gotta be fucking kidding me bro
and so i said hey everybody stop eating the pizza and everybody was like there's a fucking tooth
in my pizza dog and everybody's like are you fuck everybody's disgusted everybody throws it
everybody's so disgusted and we called called Domino's. We're like,
yo, this is ridiculous. How can this happen? They were like, oh my God, this is disgusting.
They were like, we're waving the feet. Do you guys want another piece? It was like,
no, we don't know the pizza. It's a two for the pizza, right?
So we ordered molar. This is a K-9.
So here's the funny part. I had just came from the dentist like three days ago and I had a cap and I didn't know I didn't feel it come off. I didn't feel the cap come off. And I've had like perfect teeth my entire life. And so it was new to me. It was new. A cap was new. And so when I bit and it felt, you know, it could fall out. Right. So I'm so I'm thinking I'm looking. I'm like.
Hold on, that's my shit.
But I couldn't tell anybody.
You already made the big claim.
We had made so much of a, so my lady at the time, I pulled it to the side.
I was like, yo, that was my two.
She's like, what?
I was like, yeah, that's my cap.
She's like, oh, fuck.
I was like, yeah, but don't let nobody know.
We can't tell everybody now.
Like, my bad.
Everybody's all living.
They'll never get dominoes again.
That's so fucking funny. can't tell everybody now like my bad everybody's all living they'll never get dominoes again it's like when you make a huge to-do about like someone moved my phone someone moved my phone it's lost and there's people around and then you find it like where you left it and you have to
continue your jacket for a minute and then be like oh oh, I found it over here where someone must have put it.
Oh, that's so embarrassing.
You just have to be like,
I got too aggressive
with my claim about the tooth.
And now I'm out over my skis.
Exactly.
Fellas, I got to get on this call, man.
I got to shake.
But it was great catching up with you, man.
I thought it was a good part of the show.
I'm glad you came.
You got to come back soon.
Where can everybody find your streams,
your music, everything?
Yes, on Instagram, which is
at Bobby Fino. On Twitter, it's at Arian Foster.
I actually got a new podcast out
I have with
PFT from Barstool.
It's called Macro Dosing, where we go deep from Barstool. It's called macro dosing,
where we kind of like go deep dive into conspiracy.
It's really dope,
man.
It's really,
I'm excited about it.
It's doing really well.
So y'all check that out if you want to,
but,
um,
other than that,
man,
I just be chilling.
I'll be on Twitch,
Bobby Fino every now and then.
So.
All right.
Yeah.
I appreciate y'all much love,
man.
Thanks for sure.
Take care.
Yeah.
Alright.
I love having Arian on. He's funny.
I'm glad we got him today.
Damn, I wish I was a professional athlete.
What sport?
Hockey.
Okay, I don't know.
It's one of the lowest paying but it's also like
it's my favorite i like it you know no speaking of which woody your poor flyers did you see how
that game went last night no but i know they've been tanking lately and the hurricanes meanwhile
have been doing great and you never give them any love i i was the one who said the hurricanes
are more promising the flyers early in the season,
if you recall.
I don't recall, so it probably didn't happen.
Because I'm widely known as the guy on the show
with the good memory.
With the good hockey knowledge.
Last night, the New York Rangers
beat the Philadelphia Flyers 9-0,
which is a ludicrous score in hockey.
It's absurd.
Nika Zabinijad from Sweden, a center on the New York Rangers,
is the first player since 1978 to record six points,
three goals and three assists in one period against the Flyers.
And, like, you see their poor poor goalies and they're so sad.
It's really just not fair.
The players stopped playing in front of them.
It was absurd.
And like, you know, I obviously like the Flyers because you like the Flyers.
And so I would much rather have seen the Flyers beat the Rangers 9-0. But oh my God, 9-0.
Like they're either going to be totally defeated the next few games,
or they're going to come out storming, furious that they lost nine to nothing.
Nine nothing doesn't even happen every year.
That's a very uncommon.
A good seven to two, there'll be some of those.
But nine to zero, that's a once every five-year score.
It's insane.
And you know what's crazy?
There were no goals in the third period. they scored seven goals in the second period seven goals in 20 minutes you take away that period and it's a fine game
yeah you take away that period that's a two nothing loss that's respectable
yeah and the blues are doing so bad like it's to the point now where like like one of our fourth line
like guys who isn't even on the fourth line mackenzie mckechran you know young guy more of
a bruiser than anything even he's injured now like the guys we're bringing up are getting hurt
it's absurd it like the blues have lost five in a row they're horrifically. Unless they get a bunch of their players back,
they're going to fucking miss the playoffs,
which would fucking suck.
Colorado having a nice bounce back.
Colorado on a four-game winning streak
while St. Louis is on a five-game losing streak,
so they've swapped positions.
And we play each other soon.
Like three or four games next month.
Yeah, I was really hoping the Blues
would get some of their good defensemen back
before playing Colorado, but that doesn't look like it's going to happen,
which is bad news for all the $5 that I bet on that
because Colorado, they're getting their guys back from injury.
They only had one or two guys injured, but I think they're coming back now.
I think their captain, Gabriel Landeskog, is coming back.
But it's a rough season for the Blues this year.
My God.
The amount of men lost games is how they gauge it,
where it's like how many men who lost X amount of games because of injury.
So if two players are out this game, that's two man games.
Yeah, exactly.
And the Blues are just up Schitt's creek without a paddle at this point.
I don't know what the coaches are even hoping to do.
It's like, you got to score.
And it's like, with fucking who, dude?
Who's left?
You're hoping for a second liner to become an all-star at this point.
I'm talking about something that nobody cares about now.
I'm just hearing myself talk about hockey right now. So I'm just irritated by it. I'm irritated by it that nobody cares about now. I'm just hearing myself talk about hockey right now.
I'm just irritated by it.
I'm irritated by it.
The Blues look awful.
They're not a bad team when they have their fucking players,
but they've got nothing.
Golden State Warriors were a good team, had a bad year.
They got a nice draft pick, and now they're sort of backish.
So maybe you'll do that.
Maybe you just needed a bad year to bring in another star off the lottery
and add them to a good team.
But see, that's the problem.
It's like even if they absolutely tank the rest of the year,
they won't be able to compete for a top draft spot.
Like Buffalo is so bad that it's getting historic.
Like they're historically bad this year.
And it's so sad to see it.
Like they shouldn't be that bad.
They just fired their coach.
One of their players who's been tremendously underperforming Taylor Hall.
He's a great forward,
but he did one of those like bet on yourself contract years where he's like,
I'm going to really perform on a one year contract and earn more money. It's going terribly.
And just insult to injury,
he's having a terrible year.
Someone on his own team takes a slap
shot at the net last night.
P.K. Subban, a defenseman,
cross-checks him in the back in front of the net
and it hits him right in the jaw, shatters
his jaw.
Fuck.
He got caught right with a puck in the jaw.
And it's like, dude, as if this...
They're going to wire his jaw shut to let it heal.
And he's going to lose his muscle.
It's going to suck.
Yeah, he'll lose his mass.
Well, did you see two years ago,
Chara took a deflection,
the six foot nine defenseman on the Bruins
when he was playing the Blues in the Stanley Cup,
took a deflection right to the jaw. And what they did isins when he was playing the Blues in the Stanley Cup took a deflection right to the jaw
and what they did is they took him back in the locker room
they wired his jaw shut and then he played
in the third period. Tough as nails.
How old is he by now? Jesus.
He's 43 now. At the time he was
almost 42. He was like 41 and a half.
Like that's...
43?
Now at my age it's too far
but it used to be like I'm 43 and I'm like, you know, there's professional athletes out there.
My at this point, it would be a medical miracle if any 48 year olds were playing.
But are you older than Yarmir Yager or younger?
I don't know. I'm probably older.
You're you probably are.
No, he's 49.
You're younger than Yaramir Yager.
Oh, look at that.
We have almost the same birthday.
So yeah, you're younger.
And he's so good.
His stats are still great on that team he owns in Czechoslovakia or whatever.
He's one of my favorite hockey players of all time. The fact that 18-year-old model tried to blackmail him with that photo.
And he was like, yes, do it. You want it you want it's pretty cool everyone will like me even more are you sure she was a model
yeah she was a model she was like some eastern european model that he was fucking
or instagram model something maybe i'm wrong i i saw jogger tweet about that i think it's the
same thing and and he was like you know everyone thinks that she was some floozies. Like she was a physics professor somewhere.
Oh, maybe, maybe that is the case. I mean, I, I saw that recently, that one,
I thought that was a new girl he found. Oh, maybe I'm conflating them.
What was the quote that was in there? Like when, When you hit translate, like check to English, it was like,
people think she is stupid, dumb whore.
But actually, she's not such stupid, dumb whore.
Yeah, that guy rules.
Jaromir Jagr, single, 49, the most famous man in Chechia.
Chechia he was born in 72 so i mean it was one of those like eastern block countries it's not around anymore i feel like jagger worships at the church of kyle right he's he's right he knows
dude if kyle is a priest of the church of Kyle, Jaromir Jagr is the pope at the Church of Kyle.
You're okay with that, Kyle?
I'm okay with that.
The Church of Kyle, for Christ's sake.
I feel like Kyle should be high ranking.
He's got seniority.
The Church of Jagr, yeah.
What are you going to do?
I'm going to be one of the best NHL players of all time.
Are you going to get married?
Are you going to have kids?
No, I'm just going to get strange every weekend for 30 years.
And then I don't want to stop playing.
I'm going to buy a team and they can't keep me from playing he literally does that he gives himself like first line minutes
if you trade people for not passing he's still so good yeah well he gets to decide who gets to
play around him like i don't know i'm gonna take some great passers and if they don't pass then
they'll get traded for someone who does.
That would be a real thing.
That would be a pin move.
Who wouldn't want to play with Yarmir Yager in that league?
The most famous guy from their country, as far as I know.
You want to do some AMA questions?
Yeah, I would love to hear one.
I'm just going to start from the top.
Being such a Star Trek fan, has Kyle seen SG-1?
I hate Stargate SG-1.
I think it's like a low-budget, terribly written bullshit show.
What is Stargate?
Is it like Roblox?
It's a TV show based on a Kurt Russell movie from I think maybe the late 90s.
Basically, they uncover this sort of interdimensional portal called a Stargate.
I don't know if it's interdimensional or interspatial,
like it takes you to the other side of the galaxy or some shit.
It doesn't matter.
I think it's the latter.
And there's a whole TV show where they just go to all these different worlds
through the Stargate.
You know,
it's a big circle.
They walk through it and they go and explore.
And it's just a shit to your show.
If you like it,
then enjoy it.
It's just,
didn't it go for like 10 years
they made a ton of them
they kept like rebooting
it and like making sequels to it
the movie was okay
because I like Kurt Russell
and I think it's got the fucking Lizard King
in it too
but you know I hated
the fucking show
that's surprising because that seems right up your alley.
I found the budget to be super low.
I just remember this episode when they're showing off their new sci-fi gun.
And it's like an FN P90.
And it's just like, come on, man.
You know what's out?
I'm sure none of us have seen it yet.
It came out today.
But Zack Snyder's Justice League cut.
The four-hour movie.
What does that mean? 75 75 what does that mean what is what the 75 is just it was justice league a movie that came out recently okay uh we've talked about this a little bit before but i must be getting confused
with the other justice league is a dc superhero movie yeah it was famously plagued by like a director change or maybe a producer change
or maybe more and and uh midway through they even changed the plot in a pretty significant way
and when the movie dropped compared to marvel people felt like it wasn't very good
zach snyder the original director i think yes um was like man i was going in a very different
direction and everyone who heard it was
like oh my god that's the direction i wish we were going it's dark it's gritty it's hard-hitting
it's kind of dc's thing right like they they saw success they don't know what their thing is being
a little gritty with yeah dc doesn't know what their thing is but i will say the better dc movies
are are often like that like the older batmans and stuff. So anyway, he's like, I guess they put some budget at it and they got Zack Snyder back on the case.
He's like, I'm going to take all that old footage and do the CGI and everything and make a movie that is what I hoped it would be in the first place.
Four hours long.
I heard four hours long and I was like, shit.
Well, one, they have that much footage
two you've got my attention i don't know of any other four-hour movies and uh it's out today
people seem to like it and i want to see it what's it yeah justice league batman batman superman
wonder woman aquaman cyborg the flash and there's there's more if you go to the comics and cartoons.
But Cyborg?
Oh, is that the Cyclops?
No, that's different.
It's the black guy who's like half like nanobot technology,
half athletic black man.
I think he got hurt in a football game maybe.
Or four.
He's probably got a couple different origin stories like all characters.
The way I remember the movies going is like his dad was working on that nanotechnology and like he got super injured in a car accident or something.
I actually don't remember like the basis of the energy, but the injury, but it was severe.
And the dad like puts him in the nanobot machine and it like takes over all of his fucked up body parts and turns him into this cyborg half man half machine thing
he's a pretty lame superhero nobody
nobody cares about cyborg
the Flash is
yeah but yeah
the Justice League was an awful movie and getting
back to like DC in general they really don't know
what their thing is right
like so Marvel seems
to be able to like make these quirky
films at the drop of a hat and like change the whole play style.
Like with Guardians of the Galaxy, right?
Marvel had kind of been fun loving and light and, you know, bright colors and not so super dark, you know.
Funny lines, little jabs.
Robert Downey Jr. in particular is good with the one liners.
Amazing.
Babs. Robert Downey Jr.
in particular is good with the one-liners.
Amazing. And then they made Guardians of the Galaxy with the pop
music from the 70s
and it's super light and lots
of comedy and lots of
sarcasm and stuff. And DC sees
that and they're like, oh, that's what
we make. We should make that. Suicide Squad.
Suicide Squad.
I saw that one. That was horrible.
Real bad. I had such high hopes when I saw that one. That was horrible. Real bad.
I had such high hopes when I saw...
Well, I didn't know anything about the superheroes,
but I saw all of their names.
I'm sorry, they're not superheroes. They're supervillains.
And I was like, man, this crocodile guy looks really cool.
He might do something neat.
He didn't do anything cool.
He made a bad joke twice, and that was it.
He didn't demonstrate any crocodile powers,
any swimming, any powerful tail, any biting. It was it. He didn't demonstrate any crocodile powers, any swimming, any powerful tail, any biting.
It was stupid.
I think his name was the Killer Croc.
It would have been way less stupid if he
had a cool tail, right?
Yeah. Literally, yes.
Okay, maybe you
liked it. I thought I'd think that's silly.
Just real bad.
They go back and the studio meddling.
And then Harley Quinn with the most annoying voice on earth
you know I actually don't mind
Mr. J
Mr. J
it's like it's the voice that the family guy
uses to make fun of Fran Drescher
that's her voice yeah well Fran
Drescher's voice is a voice made to
make fun of Fran Drescher you know that's not a real voice
right
Fran Drescher no You know that's not a real voice, right? Fran Drescher. I don't know much about Fran Drescher.
No, no. The actress has a perfectly normal, nice voice.
There's a really good episode of The Nanny where
she's at a sushi restaurant with
the blonde lady. She's never had sushi before.
She's like, what's and uh and she's like she's like what's this and the
lady's like oh that's wasabi it's it's really good and she just like takes a huge dollop of
wasabi and eats it and like falls to the floor it's like fucking her up so bad when she gets up
she's like oh my that was that was very intense like hey i really cleared up my sinuses i is this my new voice now is this what else oh
oh never mind sounds so funny come on it's a good show i know the fucking theme song by heart it's
it's a solid two out of ten show it's a solid it's a it's a sitcom you know it's a fucking
broadcast sitcom it's fine it's fine
it's just you know don't don't don't like go or the dvd box set or anything but it's a decent
show justice league is out today it should be cool yeah i was thinking about watching it before
the show but i figured none of you would have watched it so i'd just be like giving my points
and i think it'd be better if we both watched and we could discuss it maybe it was like 5 p.m
when i found it and i'd want to watch a part of it.
I found it last night as soon as it dropped.
Like I knew that like midnight last night or actually midnight Pacific time
was going to be like the drop time for it.
And I had been looking forward to it,
but I didn't feel like staying up all night watching.
Did you see there was an error with the release?
Yeah,
it was originally if you click Tom and Jerry,
you would get justice league about
a week and this was like yeah this was a week ago you you could see the full movie you know if you
were a child trying to watch old tom and jerry which which you'd be a little surprised by because
apparently this is this is rather dark uh in comparison both literally and uh and uh
metaphorically with the dark thing thing because what is the entry point
into this market of
superhero viewing people
if not something different than Marvel?
Marvel's already got a lot of it cornered.
People are familiar. They got it.
DC, when did they see
their most success? I don't know much about them
but I'm assuming it was
the three Batmans in 2008,
2010, 2012.
The reason that they're so hesitant but I'm assuming it was the three Batmans at like 2008, 2010, 2012, right?
So the reason that they're so hesitant to like stick with the dark thing
is because of all the backlash they got from,
maybe it was Man of Steel.
It was like, it was the Superman movie
where he's facing off with Zod
and they fucking destroy Metropolis.
Like they're having like this Superman
versus equally strong super being
from krypton and like throwing each other and body slamming each other through skyscrapers
made 9-11 look chill it made 9-11 look chill and that's even the basis of man versus or of
superman versus batman because in the in the beginning of that movie you see this flashback
of bruce wayne being there while the city is being
fucking destroyed and he's just seeing it from a he's on the ground in a fucking suv or some shit
and he's seeing these like demigods fucking destroy skyscrapers and he's also and he like
rescues a small child and and maybe the child's whole family has been killed and so he's seeing
like the the little person's view of what it's like to have a demigod with no fucking like accountability restriction you know
upon and and the general catalyst did general zod want to kill earth or did he want to kill superman
because if he just wanted to kill superman then that makes superman the bad guy but not just
leaving earth i think he had some big terraforming sort of beam that was going to ruin your earth okay and yeah i don't they've always got a big beam
is is basically superman because he came from the same planet yeah any krypton here with our
with our yellow sun kryptonian here on earth with our yellow sun will have those powers
okay man i can't wait to watch no no just
so so that was the thing like they went super dark with that and even if you look at like superman's
uniform like it's you know it's it's bright it's bright blue and red in the car and the in the
comics and stuff like bright blue and red like the american flag but in the uh in the movie it's like
this tamped down um washed out like the blues are almost like dark blue like like
almost more black than blue and the reds are like burgundy and it's his outfit's like dirty
not dirty it's just the the the the um the the color correction of the film like like everything
is like that gloomy and dark too gray and sad sad. And so when Joss Whedon went back
and like remade Justice League,
that's one of the big things that changed.
Like all of a sudden Superman's bright blue
and bright red and scenes that were supposed
to take place on like dark nights
with like rain pouring down
and are all of a sudden,
oh, it's bright daylight.
It's a nice sunny day in the park.
It's, you know, he changed a lot. Just the look of the film, the color correction of the film's a nice sunny day in the park. He changed a lot.
Just the look of the film, the color correction of the film,
and the direction, and some of the characters.
It really changed the film a lot.
So this is not at all related to superheroes,
but Kyle, I would love to hear about your recent trip.
Yeah, I had a good time, man.
It was nice to get away from my house for a few days.
Where'd you go?
Who'd you go with?
I went and picked up
fish from the airport um and uh he and i drove up to cherokee north carolina fish one of the high t
50 patrons also he's always hanging out in my twitch chat love you fish real good guy uh picked
him up uh like i said at the airport and we went up to cherokee north carolina to the harrah's uh
resort which like the last time i'd been there i was like 12 with my dad and i think we went up to Cherokee, North Carolina to the Harris, uh, resort, which like the last
time I'd been there, I was like 12 with my dad. And I think we were up in like Gatlinburg or
Pigeon Forge. Uh, and we just sort of stopped by Harris to like, see what the deal was.
And it was super rinky dink, like, like a gas station sized building with some slot machines.
Is that what you were expecting? Well, I did before I did a little research online. Uh, it was, um, before I even agreed to go,
it was, but then I looked online and I'm like, wow, this place looks really fucking big. And
they've got a Ruth Chris and they've got like five other restaurants and like X amount of slot
machines and 40 poker tables, et cetera. And, uh, but when I got there, I was even more
blown away. Like it's bigger than a Las Vegas casino because there's just one of them. It's
massive. It's maybe it's not bigger than a Las Vegas casino. It's something like 2,500 rooms,
I think, uh, in the hotel part. And the, you, I, I got, I routinely got lost walking around the resort, I guess,
between the multiple towers of hotel rooms and the casino floor.
Is there one casino floor or several?
It's shaped like an eight-pointed star or some shit.
Simple enough.
It's like you could just wander around the casino floor forever.
And it all looks the same you
know because so it's like i don't even know how to answer your question correctly because like
there's i was everything in their power to make you lost yeah it's it's so many slot machines and
so many fucking old people playing slot machines just fucking pulling handles and pushing buttons
like like when i went to leave
a couple days ago at like 6 a.m i was walking out of the casino and there's it's still full down
there and i was i i told fish i'm like they've been there all night i was like these people
didn't just wake up fun i know you hate them kyle said that like if you gave him 20 and said you
have to play the slot machines he'd just say no thank you i don't wanna like but i don't i guess i'm built different because i look i recognize they're a bad
investment i recognize they're no skill like i i could see all that but it's still fun to me
i would much rather go to roulette or blackjack if I'm just looking to like I like craps burn some
money or craps you know a game like that I'm sorry craps has a different vibe to it than
everything else like if you go to blackjack be professional you know don't be an asshole if
you're playing poker I'm out of my depth there there. But there's a general code of behavior that you're supposed to kind of maintain.
Blackjack, that is the low-class table.
And we're all on the same team.
What do you mean, craps?
Oh, I said it wrong.
You're right.
Craps, it's lower class.
It's a little more blue-collar.
It's a little like people are cheering.
Mostly, everyone wins at the same time
right in poker maybe i take your money right in craps i win you win mostly we all you can be that
don't come asshole you can be that guy but for the most part we're all on the come line we're
all hoping that this thing rolls an eight we're you know we're all hoping this thing it's a seven
out of the gate like it it's it's more fun we're all on the same team a seven out of the gate. It's more fun. We're all on the same team.
I'm intimidated by the craps table because I feel like they all know what rules are.
And I don't.
I would just have to wait.
When it rolled and it showed the result, I'd wait and then see what everyone else did.
I'd be like, oh, yeah, yeah.
Or, oh, boo, boo.
We don't like that.
We don't like fours, apparently.
I feel like I know the rules of craps,
but the fact that I'm saying I feel like I know the rules
is already an indication that there's probably something I don't get.
What I definitely don't get is some of the strategy, right?
Like, you know, you put your money on the 10 or something,
and then it fucking didn't do what you wanted,
so the smart move here is to put a
little on the yo to hedge your bet and i'm like i'm not that guy that knows that um but uh but
what i do like is just that like it's the loudest table it's the cheering table it's that we're all
it's uh you make friends and there's a group activity yeah it's a camaraderie thing like
everyone's in it together.
I've never played craps, but I definitely see the appeal.
But yeah, if I was just going to like,
you know, like Dirty had like this,
I don't know, this thing with like money on it
from like just spending enough time there,
like a rewards card type deal.
And we would stop by a slot machine and he was like,
yeah, let's just do this.
And like, just push the,
and I was just like annoyed having to sit there even looking at the lights flash because it just seems
like such a ripoff to and and i look around and it's it's literally the most popular game in any
casino i believe like to any casino in the world the most popular thing is the slots yeah that's
the moneymaker and you look at the people that are playing and look you don't
always judge a book by its cover all right you know you never you usually can judge a book by
its cover it tells you what the book's about that's a good point and these books are about
poverty and stupidity these books are filled many of these books are in wheelchairs and uh most of
these books are very old.
What a bullshit phrase.
You absolutely have to judge a book by its cover.
How else do you know what to read?
I think this is a – maybe the quote is before cover art became a thing.
When everything was just leather bound and you never – everything was just brown leather.
But when everything looked like what you'd find, like an ancient book with no title. Yeah. Yeah. Everything's brown leather but when everything looks like a you know what you'd find like an ancient book with no time yeah yeah every everything's brown leather so so that's why you don't judge like the
the the rough one because it's it might be the good one so how much did you and uh uh dirty
did you net did you win i lost a couple hundred i lost a couple hundred i had a rough time
yeah yeah yeah i uh i had a rough time of it i Yeah. Yeah. I, uh, I had a rough time of it. I, uh, I'm very happy
with how I played. Um, poker is one of those games where like it, you can take, um, you can
be happy with how you play because in the long term, that style of play or like those, that
decision-making process will like make money because like when the money would get all in,
when I would have all my money in the middle and money would get all in, when I would have
all my money in the middle and they would have all their money in the middle and we flip the cards
over, I'd be like a two to one favorite to win. And if you do that a hundred times, then obviously
I'm winning 66 times out of a, out of a hundred. It just ha it just so happened that every time I
did it over the weekend, I lost and it just kept going that way to the point where like dirty was, you know,
we're at the same table playing and he's just like, it is not your day.
He's like, that's not your whole weekend. Apparently. Yeah. Yeah.
I would flop. Uh, maybe this doesn't mean any of you, but I w I would flop a set,
you know, like, like pretty much the best possible hand that you could,
I don't know what that means.
It means that I've got two deuces in my hand, for example.
I'm starting with a pair.
And then a third deuce is there on the board immediately.
Why would you flop that?
Isn't that tremendous?
It is tremendous.
You didn't say fold.
Flop is something different.
That's the first show. The flop is the first three cards that are put on the board.
So I would start with a set of deuces, for example. This happened. that's the first flop is the first three cards cards that are put on the board so so i would
start with a set of deuces for example this happened and i don't know the guy raises me
ten dollars and i i make it 50 and he goes all in and of course i call and i look at his cards and
he doesn't even have a pair he has four spades so he's hoping that in the next two cards that
come out he'll get a flush and he gets the
flush and that literally happened like three times and then another time like i flop top set i have
three tens and the other guy has like two pair but the next card makes him a higher full house
does two pair beat three of a kind no it does not no it does not but a full uh his his larger
full house is kings full of queens
beat my like well a full house gets a three of a kind because a full house is sure it does but i
made my own full house when the board paired this is getting into nitty gritty shit what i'm saying
is like i was very happy with how i played but it didn't go very well but i had fun nonetheless
how was the rest of everything how was hanging out with dirty and fish at dinner and everything
really good really good um you know you never know when you've been like hanging
out with people online and then you meet up with them in real life if they're gonna like
smell or you know like or like have weird energy about them or like or like be odd in some way or
you know like like we were initially there were a few other guys i'm gonna name you names that were like, Hey, I'll come, I'll come, I'll come. And of course,
you know, I was like, yeah, yeah, you can all come, you know, whatever. And, uh, scum was
going to come. I w I wish he'd come. Uh, but, um, you know, we were joking like, Hey, what if that
one guy comes and like, we go back to the room early and he's just like masturbating on Kyle's
luggage or something weird like that. And it's just like, that's not okay. That's not okay. No, no. It's fine if you don't get caught.
I was like, Hey, you never know, man. That's the risk you take when you hang out with strangers.
But, uh, but no, they were, uh, they were personable, cool guys. I gotta say, I like
them both a lot more than I, than I did before. Not that I didn't like them before, but you know,
now that I've met them, um, you know, they're both like, I don't know, clean cut, cool, chill, personable guys. We had
a good time. They, neither one of them, I think had ever been to a restaurant like nicer than a
Longhorn steakhouse. You gotta keep in mind fish is 20 and dirty is 22, 24, somewhere in there.
Okay. And, uh, and. And so I was like,
we should go to Ruth Chris.
It's a pretty nice steakhouse.
It's not my favorite.
I like Morton's a lot.
If I'm looking at those chain-type restaurants
that are top-tier chain restaurants,
Morton's is amazing.
Ruth Chris is not bad. Very good.
Yeah, yeah.
It's definitely comparable
to a Morton's or a Fleming's.
And we're sitting there looking at the menu or whatever,
and Dirty's like, so the steak is $53?
I'm like, yeah, yeah.
He's like, which one are you getting?
And I'm like, well, I'm going to get the bone-in filet
because I haven't been to a nice place in a couple years either.
I've been locked down, so I'm going to get the nicest steak they have.
I want the bone in filet mignon,
the tomahawk thing.
Yeah.
He's like,
he's like,
that's $68.
And I'm like,
yeah,
yeah,
I know it is expensive.
It's going to be worth it.
You know,
I'm kind of splurging here having a nice dinner.
You know,
he's like,
and does that come with a side?
Or I'm like,
no,
no,
the sides are extra.
Yeah.
I was like,
you see,
you see here where the steamed broccoli is $12?
That's the cheapest side.
If you want the potatoes, a gratin, those are $17.
And the big spenders go for that asparagus at the bottom.
Yeah, that's what I got.
I got the asparagus.
He's like, that asparagus is $14?
I'm like, yeah.
He's like, how much are you getting?
It was a whole thing.
He's like, am I going to look weird if I don't get a side
am I going to look like a fucking bitch if I don't get a side
is this dirty or fish talking
this is dirty
but yeah it was a really fucking good steak
did you get mushrooms on it
no they don't offer
that they'll do a blue
they absolutely offer mushrooms on top it's a steakhouse
not there they don't they'll do a blue cheese crust i think if you want um not something i'm into i want that you don't put
yeah that's just like richness on top of richness i'm with taylor like i feel like
can enhance a steak that i really enjoy whereas blue cheese changes it to something that
isn't what i sign up for i'm a million percent on your team right now. Yeah, I would like mushrooms accentuate the flavor of the meat.
Like it makes it better.
Like mushrooms go so well with steak.
A blue cheese crust?
No, no.
Yeah, it's kind of like a hat on a hat.
But the steak is already so like ridiculously.
I like that.
I had to process that.
But yeah, yeah.
Yeah, the steak's already ridiculously like rich had to process that but yeah yeah yeah the steak's already ridiculously
like rich and delicious and flavorful you know at ruth's chris in particular they come out on a
plate that's 500 degrees and they're sizzling like like like it's it's like getting fajitas
at a mexican place except 100 times more expensive and uh no it was a it was one of the best meals
i've had in quite a while i really love it
it's a bone-in filet mignon so you've got this really long bone so it's like a porterhouse but
just the filet side i would imagine so i'm not a like beef cut expert or anything the porterhouse
is just you got the strip on that one side and the other side of the bone you got the tenderloin
so it's just like the bone house with the tenderloin on there yeah yeah they were out of them anyway so i ended up with just a
regular filet i want to eat a steak so bad it was so fucking good it was so fucking good like like
um but yeah i think i think they were both pleased with their uh their experience except for fish
uh fish actually ordered fish.
And Ruth Chris?
Yeah, I wasn't going to say anything, but he ordered fish.
Does he have diet to get vegan?
No, no.
He's a Muslim, but
I think they do
eat cows. I was going to say he eats everything
though. He's not a pescatarian
or any of that shit.
He's one of the good ones. He eats bacon everything though. You know, he's, he's not a pescatarian or any of that shit. Uh, he's Muslim.
He's one of the,
he's one of the good ones.
Uh, he eats bacon and pork and all that stuff.
Um,
good choices,
but kind of,
but yeah,
he ordered the,
ah,
I don't remember.
Um,
maybe I don't remember something like halibut.
If it's at a steakhouse,
it looks good.
It was,
Oh,
it was Chilean sea bass on a sweet potato and pineapple like hash.
It looked pretty good. And if I were pretty good, yeah, if I were going to get the fish,
that's the fish I would have gotten. But like, while he's got it ordered, he's like, he goes to
the bathroom and starts vomiting and like, he comes back to the table. He's like, Oh, I just
threw up a lot. I don't know what's wrong with me. Then he couldn't finish his meal.
Then the whole night
he's throwing up.
What was he throwing up from?
He got food poisoning from cafeteria shrimp
that he had earlier in the day.
Oh, Christ, Fish.
He was on seafood.
He managed to travel across the country.
He's from Detroit.
Flies into Atlanta and immediately gets food poisoning.
So he was pretty sick.
That sucks.
That fucking sucks.
Poor fish.
Yeah.
He recovered from it nicely.
Cool.
Yeah.
He's 20 bounces right back.
He did bounce right back.
But yeah,
the,
uh,
the second day I was like nine,
like Taylor,
the second day we mostly like chill.
He's not,
he's not,
Hey, I, I'm still in my 20s.
I'm a spry guy in my 20s for the next month.
And then I'm in my 30s with the rest of you.
And then we're just three old guys doing a podcast.
Yes, you're right.
I've been the last strand of us in the 20s for five years now.
Or no, Kyle, you're 34're 34 34 i'll be 35 in may
getting there almost there yeah we um but but after that first day i was like i'm not gonna
lose any more money i i feel like luck is not on my side i'm not gonna play any more poker i'm just
gonna chill just gonna enjoy this little make a little vacation out of this uh enjoy the good
food enjoy the company and everything.
Did you play instead?
I didn't play.
I played South Park on the hotel TV because it's hard to lose money playing South Park on the hotel TV.
But it turned out you can lose money doing that because I was starving.
And I was like, I'm going to order some breakfast.
You guys want any breakfast?
They're like, no, no, I don't want anything.
I ordered room service. I ordered an omelet
and a bowl of oatmeal.
Guess how much an omelet and a
bowl of oatmeal and coffee.
No, $31.
That's good.
I bet it's absurdly high.
With tip, $48.
That is criminal. They should be put high with tip $48 that is criminal
they should be put in prison
$48
and uh
steal their whole country from them put them on reservations
I was charging
because we're in that's our country
I was eating that oatmeal
and I remember thinking this oatmeal
was like $9 for this bowl of oatmeal
and I remembered like I bought oatmeal the other day.
And I think for like $2, you get one pound, 12 ounces of dry oatmeal, like roughly like
the big container.
And I was like, okay, so four of those.
So we're talking about like seven pounds of oatmeal dry is what you can buy for this amount of money.
And I was just picturing seven pounds of oatmeal and bowls on the table I was eating on.
And it would have more than covered the whole fucking table.
And I've got this little.
You'd need 19 bowls of total to equal the cost of this fucking check.
Hera's fucking.
It was ridiculously overpriced.
It wasn't an indian reservation
thing it is yeah okay harrah's cherokee casino and resort so there's no tax there's a oh what
are the fucking people call it they call it a uh an indian fee a forced gratuity
now they have a different word for it i don't know where it is but it's still seven percent or something like that it's it's like a reservation levy or something
like that i don't remember exactly what it was called but there was you know tax included on
everything they just called it by a different name and they collected it rather than the state
i know dirty is a very you know uh avid poker player That's what he does for a living.
Are you pretty impressed?
Like, oh man, he's very good at this. He lost more than I did.
We both had a rough time.
Oh, I thought Dirty was way up or something.
I mean, in the grand scheme of things,
it's what he does for a living.
He makes six figures a year playing poker,
but for that day, it didn't go so well.
Bummer.
I would hate that.
That'd be so stressful.
All your job is gambling.
So Fish did the best.
Cool.
Actually, that's funny.
Fish bought
like $200 worth of Dirty's
Action, so he lost money too.
Fish is under
21.
He's only 20.
That's a silly joke because that's illegal. I don't think so. Fish is under 21. Yeah, he's only 20.
That's a silly joke because that's illegal.
I don't think so.
I mean, that's between them.
They can do whatever the fuck they want.
Also, I never knew how that works, right? If I say, hey, Kyle, here's $10.
Put it in the slots.
And you like slots.
Let's pretend you do.
It's like, is that Woody's $10 that just won?
Or is that Woody's $10 that just lost?
You should know. It's like, is that Woody's $10 that just won? Or is that Woody's $10 that just lost? Well, it would be kind of complicated if I put all the money in a pile.
It works better with roulette, right?
Because at one point I had $40 for the chips in my pocket,
and Dirty was going back to play some more.
And I was like, here, cash these in for me.
Just bring me cash back.
He's like, sure.
You don't want me to put it on a number on the roulette wheel?
And I was like like i'm sure bring me cash back or nothing hmm because like i want to say like picking a number there's
either like 32 or 36 numbers somewhere in there it's like sounds right ish yeah it wasn't gonna
go well 36 plus two greens i don't're not going to fucking nail one straight up.
Because there's like a 16 black, right?
Pardon?
Isn't there like a 16 black?
16 red?
No.
So the numbers, I believe,
the numbers go from like 1 to 30-something.
32 or 36, something in there.
But it's every other number is either red or black so
it's not like there's two twos two threes etc so i've never done i didn't either red or black or
then there's like the like the zeros or like green or some shit you know it's 36 numbers plus one or
two greens yeah yeah that that's that's why you can't beat the game by just doubling down over and over.
The casino still has an edge because of those green numbers. I knew someone, this is many years ago now, that was addicted to gambling.
And he had to stay away from any sort of gambling thing.
And it turns out addiction to gambling collapses your life even faster than like alcoholism drug abuse like
gambling just all it takes is just like one day and like everything can be fucked and this guy
he he was he talked about how much he was saving to like gamble on things and then like he went
away for a you know week or something this is when i worked at uh the car
rental place and he came back and was like yeah it didn't didn't go as well as i thought didn't
go as well as i thought lost a bunch of money and like after a while of pressing him it was like he
lost like twenty thousand dollars oh shit like a serious a serious amount of money yeah see i could
never do that he was one of those like he was a straight edge guy that's like i don't smoke pot i don't drink i don't do drugs i don't do any
of that stuff and but it's like i made some bad decisions gambling is maybe maybe try coke
yeah what did furios furios say and sopranos bet with your head not over your head and he like
slaps the guy.
No bitch to me.
Yeah.
It's like,
it's like going in there.
I was like,
all right,
I'm going to bring this amount of money.
I consider,
I consider this money already lost.
Right?
Like,
like this is the fee for enjoying a couple of days of gambling.
Yeah.
I looked at it like that,
like just a vacation cost,
especially since the room was free and I had no other costs other than the gasoline to get there and fish paid for half of that.
So it's like I'm here for like twenty five dollars worth of gasoline.
So I lose five or six hundred dollars.
That's what that's what a weekend's vacation cost.
I had when I used to go to the casino sometimes when I was younger and I much less money than you do.
And I used to rank it against movies, you like all right a movie cost me whatever 18 for
two hours i'm gonna try and keep my losses in that neighborhood you know if i play for four
hours and i walk out down 36 i had fun that was your entertainment fee yeah yeah i did have fun
it was uh i hadn't played live poker in a long fucking time. It was really fun. The dealers were funny. There were some old guys
that were like, and I mean old. One guy was a World War II vet.
What? This is for him.
He'd go all in and he would just push all of his chips
in a pile in the middle and the dealer's finally like, sir,
you can just ask for the all-in chip
and put it out there that way we don't all have to wait five minutes for your shaky old hands to
count the chips again because like he'd push them all in and then the guy he was playing against
you know a lot of people that looked like you for less pretty much yeah there were a cut and then
later on i was yeah I can always tell.
You look like a kraut.
You look like a kraut.
Yeah, exactly.
What war were you in, sir?
The war against Germany.
The Austro-Hungarian Empire.
What the fuck?
You know, you had the spiky hats.
The Archduke will never reign over Europe.
What?
I was playing late at night.
It was maybe midnight, 1 a.m.,
and there was an old guy directly to my left.
Oh, by the way, it's kind of cool.
They have these plexiglass dividers at the casino,
so everybody's in a little bubble.
I like that a lot.
And obviously, everybody's masked,
unless you're sipping your coffee or whatever. like in a little bubble. And so I liked that a lot. And obviously everybody's masked, uh,
unless you're like sipping your coffee or whatever.
And this old guy to my left was falling asleep at the table.
And this like pretty attractive, like Russian or something dealer.
She's like,
wake up,
wake up.
She's like snapping in his face,
like wake up,
big blind,
big blind.
And I'm just like,
I was loving it.
She was like ruthless as could be
with this guy like she was like
sir sir it's your turn
she's like wake the fuck up
snapping right in his face
and I'm just like
what would the rule be if he had died
would it be just
from the game and like
if he dies
who do you give the chips to well it's a dead hand in that case so
whoever else is in
like air bud rules where it's like oh he died during the hand everyone gets his chips i i guess
we turn the cards over and if he wins you know maybe maybe we push him into his pile that seems
like the right thing to do, frankly.
Just smash his dead old face right in his pile of chips.
Yeah, I guess we wait for his family to get there
and they get his winnings.
I wouldn't want to steal from a dead man.
I guess we'll just, if he wins, he wins.
But if he can't call another bet,
then we're going to fold him out, of course.
Can't make decisions for the man.
Well, I guess it wouldn't be that fun
if someone died at your table then no it'd be entertaining though there was there was one guy
that um dirty's like oh that's my friend right there that's alan or whatever alan's walking by
he's like yo alan come on try to get a seat at our table and he tells me he's like alan's great
he's he's a wild man he's always entertaining like five
minutes later i hear someone yell across the room alan's storming past us with his money in his
hands he's like they're kicking me the fuck out they're kicking me the fuck out and dirty's like
what what for because i called the guy a fucking cocksucker
okay that guy rules.
It's a shame you couldn't have hung out with Alan.
In my defense, he was giving me a blowjob.
Yeah, yeah.
He got pissed off at somebody because he kept losing.
How the entree and side system worked at Ruth's Chris.
He would have bought asparagus and broccoli.
$26 on sides. Yeah have bought asparagus and broccoli. $26 on sides.
Yeah, the asparagus is great.
When you get restaurant asparagus
and you eat it with your steak,
it's like, man, I should
be eating asparagus every meal. This is so
good. And it's not until you make it at home that you're like,
oh, that was
just in a butter bath before they brought
it to me. That's why. It came with Bearnaise sauce.
I don't remember exactly. I've made made bernets before but i honestly don't remember what's in it i'm pretty sure it's
just uh like eggs and like it's basically fancy mayonnaise yeah yeah that's i was gonna say like
egg i don't remember exactly what's in i think maybe lemon juice or something like that anyway
it's fucking amazing it was so fucking good yeah so i had a good time it was it was it was super nice just to get out of the
house and uh and go somewhere and uh i felt super safe there with the mask regulations they were
super strict with the masks like nobody was like maskless throughout the whole thing everybody had
it on almost like 999% of the time.
It's still so funny you guys live in areas
where people don't wear the masks.
When I see things like
people aren't wearing masks and they're
being confronted, it's like, really?
That's astounding because in St.
Louis, you might think
because it's Missouri.
I haven't seen anyone.
It's rare.
It's rare here. I don't seen anyone. It's rare. It's rare here.
I don't really fucking care, but that's it.
I never see people walking around in Walmart, Target, CVS, Walgreens.
Walmart is the exception. If you go to Walmart, you will absolutely see
people not wearing the mask. I haven't.
Here you absolutely will see. I don't like it must be around here yeah here you absolutely will
see because like i don't go to walmart often but i was uh i had to go to the walmart pharmacy a few
months ago and i was just like oh my fucking god these assholes because they check you at the door
oh you got your mask on yeah yeah i do come on in come on and as soon as i get in they fucking
either take it completely off or go like chin mask or whatever the fuck they just do the douchiest
thing for lip or even just like below their chin like it like it's a fucking chin mask or whatever the fuck they just do the douchiest thing for lip or even just like
below their chin like it like it's a fucking chin bra or something like that it's you know
you were talking to earn you weren't complaining as much as me about glasses fogging so i have like
you know the kn95 masks no other like kind of like stick out like in front like they're pretty rigid
those ones are way better at not fogging up your glasses.
But the best one at not fogging up your glasses is just like the cloth elastic one.
That might be what I use.
I don't wear glasses very much.
I just wear them at the computer.
That's what's so weird about meeting you again, re-meeting you every time is like,
this isn't the Woody I know.
I don't like this.
This is different.
Yeah, I get it.
Yeah, I didn't wear my sunglasses at the table.
It just seemed kind of douchey anyway.
So I didn't really have that issue.
Why wouldn't you do it?
Isn't that great for poker tactics?
I think for douchey people and like people on television maybe um but but i i was definitely gonna feel like a douchebag if i
was wearing sunglasses at the table plus like enough what kind of what kind of fucking aces
am i playing against that that are playing one dollar two dollar texas hold them and are like
looking into my eyes and gleaming
something from them.
They're gleaning info from your eyes.
If my opponents at that table
are gleaning info from my
eyes, then I've made a major
error by sitting at this table to begin with.
Yeah, they deserve to win at that point.
If they can look into my eyes and know,
then they deserve to fucking
beat me. I'll just give it to them.
So, yeah, completely silly.
I thought it would be brighter in there for some reason.
That's why I was wanting to wear them.
But it's pretty damn...
Make it comfortable.
They had an eSports room there
where you could go and play CSGO
and a bunch
of different e-sports games on uh gaming computers that was neat was it a money thing or just a
i think you it wasn't like competitive for money but you had to pay to play like like it was like
a amount of money per hour yeah exactly it was like a it was like a super duper modern arcade
essentially yeah like they had fucking gaming pcs with headsets and
shit and people playing like competitive cs go never seen that before
just posted he said jim's opened up today near the the house i'm putting on 30 pounds in three
months and he's flexing with his arm to the side. He's in tremendous shape.
Yeah.
Super low body.
And isn't he like six foot six or something?
He's like Harley sized.
He played D one basketball.
I think Penn state,
but I'm not sure,
but like I could look that up.
Oh,
that's cool.
I did not know that.
Yeah.
I'll look it up.
Did they ever figure out why he got banned from twitch or no
no just kind of that's still no one ever said but i'm sure he knows
oh i i guarantee he knows with how popular he is it was probably something oh that he started
talking to a competitor before his twitch partnership was ended because like even someone
on my level some bullshit f-list twitch, like I can't stream on YouTube.
Like that, that's part of the contract.
You can only live stream on their platform
once you're partnered.
He played at Cal State Poly Division 2,
so I was wrong.
I got another AMA question.
This guy says, I got a couple here.
What kind of footwear do each of you wear?
Boots, sneakers, dress shoes?
None?
Like, what am I, Hobbit?
None?
No, we wear shoes, you fucking idiot.
I'm kind of into footwear.
I kind of wear none most of the time.
I have a pretty extensive collection of shoes
because unlike shirts and jackets and pants like they never
wear out as long as you take care of them so like i just collected shoes over the years
um i wear a lot of flip-flops like around the house obviously but if i'm going out i usually
wear something like uh some sort of a boot or uh like a dress shoe but i've got a lot of sneakers
like not like not like air force ones and shit like that
not like like sports sneakers or like hip-hop sneakers but just like uh more like fashion
sneakers i bought these the other day
these boots like those are nice i like those yeah are nice. I like these a lot. When I go out in public, I usually wear boots like that that I think look nice.
These are from the Florsheim Shoe Company.
F-L-O-R-S-H-E-I-M.
These are super comfortable.
My walk-around don't care shoes.
I think they're called the fuck are they called? Zero slippers. My brother bought
these for me for Christmas two years ago. And immediately my dogs chewed through a couple of
the elastic things. And so now I use them as walk around and as gym shoes, even though they're
slippers because they're perfectly flat at the bottom. And they basically do the same thing as
like those all stars, which are also great for lifting just the perfectly flat bottom and so i've been wearing these and then my actual shoes
are pretty similar to kyle where it's you know a dress boot looking thing that looks good with
jeans because if i'm going out i'm wearing jeans always so i actually don't leave the house very often so i'm barefoot
probably 95 of my life um do you not wear shoes in your house ever i i wear them when i work out
i have weightlifting shoes and i wear them when i i don't know burn boxes or something
have yard work and stuff but
inside I tend to be barefoot and that's where I am
most of the time
when I do go out I wear
vans I'm actually showing them to everybody
right now but my shoes look like this
good lifting shoes
I actually wear actual lifting shoes
yeah I think they want like that flat
base is very good for lifting.
Some people like these wedges.
My lifting shoes are pretty much high heels.
Oh, do you have those big squat wedges?
Yeah, they're not.
Those are supposed to be great.
I love mine.
It's not so much that there's a wedge.
It's for people with poor mobility, and I don't think that's my problem.
I like how firm the bottom is.
It's practically a wooden bottom.
And now everything else feels like walking on marshmallows.
And when I lift, I like a really firm shoe.
But yeah, I wear Vans.
I go skating with Colin a lot.
I find that they look good with shorts and jeans.
Whereas a lot of things like the boots that Kyle showed look really good in jeans, in my opinion find that they look good with shorts and jeans whereas a lot of things like
the boots that kyle showed look really good in jeans in my opinion but look really silly with
shorts oh you'd be like a fucking school shooter or some shit you wear those with shorts that
doesn't work but no you gotta wear them both so yeah anyway that's why i wear bands a lot
because i wear shorts almost all the time yeah that sense. I was thinking of getting out of the house.
I haven't even talked to you guys about this yet.
I think I'm going to ride my motorcycle
for a while.
I don't know how long.
Maybe Oregon?
Maybe Mexico?
So like a Forrest Gump type journey.
You're going to go from North Carolina to Oregon?
There's this thing called the Transamerica
Trail. It's pretty much dirt roads from North Carolina to Oregon? There's this thing called the Trans America Trail.
It's pretty much dirt roads
from North Carolina to Oregon.
Oregon? I don't know.
I'm getting pretty serious
about it.
I'm kind of fucking
ready.
Do it, dude. Just fucking do it.
It's awesome.
I was like, you know,
I could get the production figured out right i i'm sometimes the trouble i have in like doing
the show on the road is it's like i'm in small town georgia and i need a good internet i don't
have these same restrictions uh on a trip like this i am wherever i want to be like all right on thursday i have to
be in a city you know we can make that happen a city big enough to have internet connection
and i'm like with that restriction that's not that restrictive let's fucking do pka from a place with
trustworthy internet and uh we'll do it so i don don't know, six weeks or so, something like that,
living on a motorcycle.
You'll be coming through my neck of the woods.
Hit me up if you're around the STL area.
I mean, if it's that soon, I was going to say,
like, we could see a blues game together,
but that doesn't seem realistic.
It might be April.
So I mentioned it to a friend of mine who's like,
you need a partner for that.
And I was like know i have this restriction
and that you know i need to go to a place with good internet every so often and uh he just he
had a bone surgery just recently and uh i was like i was gonna do it in april but if i have to wait
till may for you to get ready then um you know we're down and he's like yeah i think i'm gonna
quit my job i'm gonna be able to do something like this and he's like yeah i think i'm gonna quit my job i'm gonna
be able to do something like this and he's like how he keeps asking me how serious am i and i'm
like serious i'm not the weak link i'm going to do this uh how serious are you and uh um i was
thinking of daily vlogging it i don't't know, maybe less than daily something.
Just do it at the rate that you want.
If people like the content, then I'll keep making it.
I guess that's what the scoop is.
Do you have a cam that could go on your bike
or helmet? I do. Of course you do.
Yeah.
I've got that mostly figured
out. I've done it before.
What would it show your your helmet
like face as you're going in like the yeah it would be a pov it's a little silly for it yeah
it kind of sits next to your jaw and um and then i have a mic you know in i have the like the world's
quietest help so that there's not too much wind noise or anything on the mic. And so, yeah, I think I'm going to take my motorcycle and do something.
It start for like 15 years now.
I've wanted to sail across the Atlantic Ocean.
That's like kind of the genesis of this.
I wanted to sort of just do an adventure.
And the thing is, I don't live near the water.
I don't have a sailboat. I don't have a sailboat.
I don't know how to sail.
Not living near the water makes those two problems, no boat and no knowledge, a real issue.
I get seasick, but not just seasick.
I get like monumentally seasick.
And I also get airsick and I also get carsick.
I'm like that guy.
I'm weak that way.
And I'm like, maybe that's just a dumb idea.
Maybe we should move the goalpost a little here.
Maybe we should just take your motorcycle someplace.
You know,
so Mexico city was on my list.
There's a place.
Oregon would be so much cooler.
Like those roads through Oregon.
So wooded,
so pretty.
It's really nice.
It's true.
I like Oregon.
There's a place called meat Cove in Canada that got a little...
Where is it in Canada?
I will give you a think.
I guess I'm assuming...
Top right.
Western Canada.
No.
Oh, Eastern Canada.
Okay.
Yeah, yeah.
So it would look something like that.
It looks like New Newfoundland.
Yeah.
And apparently that is one of the top, if you have a motorcycle experiences to enjoy.
So these are the kinds of things,
like I'm not totally set,
but mostly the transatlantic trail is the goal here.
This is a pretty cool track to take,
especially that end part where you're going by Prince Edward Island
and all those little angles.
So this thing here, I'm trying to fit it on this screen for everybody, is the Transatlantic
Trail.
And you can see it.
This one looks a little different than the other one I saw.
There's more than one version of this, but it picks up.
I'd pick it up in North Carolina somewhere about halfway through.
But it picks up, I'd pick it up in North Carolina somewhere about halfway through.
And then, you know, Tennessee, Mississippi, Oklahoma, Colorado, Utah, Idaho.
You'll be way too south for me on this trail.
Yeah, this doesn't take me very close to you, but who knows what it could bring, you know?
Well, if you ever do, I'll grab a beer or a coffee with you, on the time you arrive yeah but i think i want to
do this and i'm like sort of figuring it out i'm already buying the gear i need like i'm
pretty head over heels into this thing nice and uh yeah that's a cool thing to do you have to
what is that you have to drive up through virginia and then take a immediate down so i'm kind of doing a fewer rules on this thing like
um the eastern the east coast part that you're talking about is all paved roads so i'm like
who cares right let's pick it up with at least the gravel starts it doesn't really matter which
paved roads i take to get to the interesting part the east coast is a lot of paved road with a
little bit of gravel and trail here and there when you start getting to the middle part. The East Coast is a lot of paved road with a little bit of gravel and trail
here and there. When you start getting to the middle of the country, it's a lot of just dirt
road after dirt road, small town to small town. And then as you get into the Rockies, it's more
technical trail, probably above my skill level, but I'll do it anyway. Yeah. Give it a go. Do you
see that track through Wyoming? It's like they're intentionally doubling the length of Wyoming.
That must be a fun place to drive.
So there's a couple trails that people can take.
If you were to try to...
I'm surfing this here.
When you go to...
Oh, browse.
Browse our maps.
You know, this whole track looks like it's allergic to Nevada.
If you look at the left side of the map.
I think his website's a little tricky to understand.
But at the top, they have these non-state adventures.
And I think some of those are on that map you're looking at, like this Atlantic Ocean Spur.
And then the bi-state adventures is the actual TAT, the Trans-America Trail.
So this is a bunch of different potential
options yes thank you that's those that's the phrasing i needed so um but yeah one of those
you can kind of see the main one that goes from left to right is the transatlantic trail and i
think i'm going to do that just spend whatever month plus um so that's what, four shows from a hotel
and be emotionally richer at the end of it, I hope.
So if you get to that end point,
which looks like it's in Western Wisconsin on this one,
do you just drive back home or do you take the track back?
Yeah, do you like double back?
Very confused, Western Wisconsin.
First of all, I just went to the Trans Am Trail.
Oh, it's definitely.
No, no, no, no, no.
He's going all the way to the fucking West Coast.
Yeah, it's.
And then will you will you fly back from there?
Will you drive back?
So a lot of people ship their bike back.
I don't know what I'll do.
We'll see.
Maybe I'll even decide when i
get there knowing you you'll be like i want more and you'll feel that there's only two options
right well there's three there is shipping the bike back which is probably what i would do i
feel like i'd be like there'd be some wear and tear like like after a physical wear and tear
and maybe a little uh mechanical wear and tear mechanical two fingers are broken and one wrist one ankle sprained at this point and maybe your back is
just so sore you know or you know or then there's like go up and go through canada on the way back
or go through the southwest on the way back because the southwest would be so fucking cool
if i were doing this i i want to i'd want to do some kind of a trip that involved the southwest i don't know that
i want to go through like for me for me it would be i've made this trip so many times already that
i really don't want to go through louisiana and mississippi and alabama and all that shit and on
through texas but if i can include nevada uh new mexico and arizona somehow like those roads out
there are so beautiful like especially arizona arizona in particular like i've never driven on
those roads what makes them so great is it the rock formations in arizona yeah you get the really
interesting mixture of like topography right so like there's parts of uh western texas and new mexico that
look like something out of one of those old high plains drifter clint eastwood movies where it's
just desolate and there's like scrub brush and a little bit of like dirt and that's it it's just
flat as fuck um well there may be some rolling hills and stuff but like what i really mean is
like you look as far as you can into the distance and there's no one there's no houses on the side of the road out there
like you've driven through wyoming i've never i've driven the entire southern united states
like literally i don't know start from georgia hit florida for the fuck of it and then go all
the way to phoenix arizona i've done that um i've hit the entire west coast
the entire east coast and i've hit a little bit of the midwest i i i drove from seattle down to
oregon and then across to idaho whatever that you gotta come to the midwest we're a center of
culture i have intentionally avoided the well the thread basket of america because there is a cool place in America.
The coolest guys.
Yeah.
So I've never been to Kansas or Nebraska or Oklahoma or Missouri or any of
those places.
No,
that's not fair.
We have two major cities.
Don't lump us in with Oklahoma.
There was never a reason for me to go there.
Um,
but like I said,
I've hit,
I've driven up to ohio
like like northern ohio and all through indiana and i'm so excited for this yeah that's all i'm
excited for you because i can tell how much you fucking love this kind of thing yeah i want to
make a memory i hope my buddy can really come it sounds like you really can he's uh he's in an interesting spot in life he's financially
successful and uh kind of just i don't know let me see if i can find would you do this alone or no
i would do it alone but when my friend expressed an interest i got pretty excited about yeah
sharing the experience with someone i really like the idea of doing it but like
i'm worried about how like like like if i sit in this chair for like like when we do our hangouts
and i'm literally in this chair for my ass hurts my ass hurts after a while like that drive i went
on with fish like it was only like three hours and 30 minutes or something like that. My, my, my ass was hurting.
I was like,
if we were going to do like two more hours,
I'd need to get out and like stretch for 10 minutes.
Cause like,
I want to ask is fish's language in person as absolutely offensive as the,
the Patreon chat.
Uh,
well he doesn't have anybody to pick on when it's just me and him.
So we're just talking about like weed and, you know selling cars and stuff like that because they've got a dealership
uh he just got like an amazing deal on i think it was a charger i think he got like a a 2019
charger with like 40 000 miles on it with the 6.4 liter in it for like 18 000 or something like that
are they still cool the chargers still look cool i mean it's not what I would want, but it's a pretty sick car for that price.
I mean, I always thought Chargers looked really cool.
I just don't know what they look like anymore.
They look nice.
I mean, they're mostly cop cars.
Like I see down here, I see a lot of cops driving them.
But he said they're really popular if they're in Detroit where he is.
So it's a good item for them to have at their dealership.
So my friend friend i shared the
conversation by accident but there's nothing private there he's like i have enough cash to
live three to four years without worry i have things i want to do and like this was on his list
i don't know exactly call it 37 cool yeah no i would i would like to do something like this i
really would like like if i were free right now, it would be super tempting.
I mean, it would be, it would be super tempting to like, just,
you said it if I was free, right? Yeah. Yeah.
Like it would be super tempting to like go buy a bike and be like, yeah,
let's fucking do this. I'll go. Sure. And look, just let you know,
going in, I might pull a wings of redemption,
get the fuckingessee and be like
this is not this isn't for me i think i've got a one and two chance of surviving this
and i totally would like like if we got to like kentucky or name a place fucking ohio we got we
got like a day in and i like i got squirrely out on the fucking interstate
and like had one of those like life or death like come to jesus kind of moments and we pull over and
i'm just like i mean i was just completely out of control through that whole thing there
my friend that i'm going with is not a motorcyclist like he bought his first motorcycle
it's really for his daughter it's a
125 so it's it's small for he's a full-size okay but he's not riding that it's small for it wouldn't
be the one he takes i mean on the trip right but he did buy it with the idea like you know
this can drag an adult around i wrote it i liked it and uh uh when i um like i hopped on and i started i went
through the gears and just goofed off and he owns a little plot of land that he bought to fly
paramotors and uh he's like you're the first one who's been into third so that's his level of
motorcycle experience oh shit yeah and he's gonna come on this cross-country trip with you
potentially i mean i feel like if i had a bike i'd get to that level on day one
yes yeah you know what i would do i would i would fly there and meet you
uh i i've been getting drunk at the airplane bar for four days oh i didn't tell you this this
this reminds me of the motorcycle thing so like i ordered that 45 breakfast and i was like all right no more of that so like the next
night we ordered uh i ordered a pizza i was like i was like let's get that grilled chicken pizza
from pizza hut that sounds tasty and so i know right i like grilled chicken i really do i like
it better than pepperoni you're a fucking idiot crust they're great i get thin and crispy you know like like it's it's like it's like a cracker
with with pizza stuff on it it's just anyway probably better for you yeah i'd imagine so
so like the uh i like that.
I'm sorry, Kyle.
We keep interrupting.
You got thin crust chicken pizza?
Yeah, yeah.
Grilled chicken.
And anyway, so I go downstairs, get the pizza, come back up to the room, eating the pizza.
And I get a text message from the pizza guy.
He's like, I know this is a little weird.
I just want to say I'm a huge fan.
I'm such a huge fan.
I didn't recognize you at first, but then I saw the name on the order.
I know it's a huge invasion of your privacy to text you like this.
I'll never message you again.
I just wanted to say that.
I'm like, all right, it's all cool, man.
Thanks a lot.
I appreciate it a lot.
But then the next night I was like, well, I think we'll order from Domino's tonight maybe.
Because like, it wasn't that.
Do you think he's a fan of PKA or FPS Russia videos?
Did you get a vibe?
The way he phrased it, he could be both.
Like he mentioned FPS Russia. Is he a normal gun lover or a fucking weirdo?
That's the answer.
Look, I'm not going to call this guy a weirdo.
He seemed like a nice enough guy.
He said, hey, it's blank from dominoes
oh this was dominoes the first night i just wanted to say i love your stuff been a fan since fps
russia so that kind of like means to me that maybe he discovered you there and he still watches you
yeah maybe so anyway man i wasn't weirded out i i appreciated you you know your kind words and
everything but um you know i didn't want't want to have a weird interaction or anything like that.
You never know with people.
So the next night I ordered from somewhere different,
and we went down.
It was infinitely weirder.
It was infinitely weirder.
The guy's like, hey, that's a nice jacket.
And he doesn't get my pizza out of the bag yet.
And I'm just like, yeah, thanks, man.
And he touches the leather he
like he like feels my my jacket it was like george costanza he felt the fabric he felt fabric he like
reaches out and touches me and i don't recoil or anything i'm not but it was weird and he's like
do you ride and and like it's not a motorcycle jacket i'm wearing it's just like a
it's like a ralph lauren like i don't know fairly expensive like leather jacket that i'm wearing but
it's not like the motorcycle collar i have one of those i like those i do like that style it's my
favorite style of leather jacket but anyway it's just like that guy weirded me out big time that
guy weirded me out big time i didn't like him touching me at least you're like famous enough
that it makes sense i had someone recently i was at a gas station buying beer and i like put it up
there and like the guy like said after i was buying he's like hey this is gonna sound crazy
are you are you taylor from pka and like every instinct told me to say no but i didn't i was like yeah i'm glad you like the show
man and it was uh i never he was nice everything was totally all he said was like oh dude i i love
the show i like your impressions and i was like that's really nice of you man thank you and that
was it that was it but in my head it was like is this going to be weird is this going to
be odd because i don't want to be seen in real life and people know the absolute nonsense i say
online i don't i've met i've met tons and tons of whatever you want to call them i i don't like
the word fan um but you viewers would taylor call them fucking weirdos yeah yeah are you a gun lover or a fucking weirdo being a weirdo is not a bad thing
we're all all three of us are fucking weirdos indeed pretty weird man no but i've met i met
i've met hundreds of them maybe a thousand or more at this point and like very very rarely are they
anything but really cool polite people i met like one douchebag at a paintball event one
time who was just like clear like like just i bet he's got a maga hat at home he was at the
capital riots like he like he like you he hated you he was just unstable like like like he had
some sort of conspiracy theory about like um me like working for the anti-gun lobby or something.
And he went into this whole diatribe and it was sued.
Well, they're doing a terrible job.
Well, yeah.
He was like, I know they're paying you to make gun owners look bad.
And I'm just like, who's paying me to do – what are you talking about?
Who are you?
And he was like a 40-year-old man.
It was just so weird he thought you
like were an insider for anti-gun where it's like you're going to make them look like such
fucking idiots they did get me it was so weird that like like at that point you don't even want
to argue with them you just want to like oh see you later uh you you you probably shoot me right
here if i if i if i press this issue like
like yeah that's how we go you just you just agree with whatever they say you're you're a
part of the gun lobby and you're gonna shut down you're exactly right sir i apologize for
i'm working trying to get out i've gotten right where they want me that's the way to do it frame
it like you're i'm trying to get out thank god you saw through the facade can you
help me get out of this and then suddenly he'll be like well i'm on your side man we're all fine
no we're all fighting for the sake of me that'd be that'd be funny but also like immediately he
would realize you were fooling with him and then he'd probably kill you yeah like that guy might
literally be the the only person
i've ever met out of what's got to be over a thousand people from all the like e3 stuff and
all the paintball events and like vitcon stuff i did like and just the random people that i like
see in public or whatever that that was even borderline like that guy was super creepy and
weird what a fucking weirdo i i remember uh going to that
first paintball event and like the way it went is like t martin and i we were fucking the tiniest
fish in a pond at the time nobody and he's huge he was bigger than me at the time i was the fucking
nobody and i just got invited because people thought it was funny and so i we did that and
i remember we were standing around in a
pavilion it was maybe day two when hundreds of people were gathered around trying to get
autographs from kyle and woody and everyone and someone came to me i was just standing over the
side like having a sandwich or something and someone's like hey are you taylor from pka and
from your channel i was like yeah are you murka durka at the time and from your channel? I was like, yeah. Are you Merk Derker at the time? And I was like, yeah.
He's like, will you sign my shirt?
And I was like, are you sure?
Nobody wants to talk to, go get one from them.
And he's like, no, dude, I really like your videos.
And I was like, oh, what?
That's really nice of you, man.
And then like on his shirt, I had to be like,
how do you sign merch
so i just did like an md real quick i felt like the faster you do a signature the more it seems
official so just yeah and it looked it looked better than i thought frankly pretty cool very
cool looking signature we loved it we love to see it that was so funny jeremy was always more
you know woody and kyle are there with a hundred people in each line you
are you sure you don't are you not meaning them jeremy was always like the like i would get
uncomfortable sometimes i'm like hey man we can just hang out here like you don't have to be weird
about this like like like don't because people would be like trembling sometimes and it's kind of like i don't don't tremble don't tremble to speak to me
like like we could bullshit here like our responsibility to make them feel okay about
this right like like oh yeah how do i help this person yeah i try a responsibility i've done my
best to like never have like a bad i don't want anyone to ever walk away and be like, well,
that guy was an asshole.
So I've always tried to like make the best impression on those people as
possible and like show them that like, look, look,
I'm just happy to be here. I'm happy to meet you. I'm,
I appreciate you coming here. You know, like that,
that's always like my genuine sort of feelings about the matter. We were,
we were at like a, I don't know where we were at that like tilted kilt restaurant outside of
Chicago.
And then I remember I was sitting next to you and then you went to the
bathroom for like 30 minutes and I was like,
I was vomiting.
Yes,
I was vomiting.
Uh,
I think that's where we were.
Vodkas.
I think,
well,
they had FPS Russia night at the fucking bar.
So half the TVs are playing sports half the tvs are playing sports
and the other half are playing my videos and everybody's just buying me alcohol you know
what's funny about that is like as you like went away like i was like man i'm like really good and
good facetime with kyle i think he likes me and then like you went to the bathroom and like you
stayed away for so long that i was like damn damn, I must have really fucked up.
I thought I was being funny and having good comments and things and he just
leaves. He must be talking to someone
else. I was in the bathroom. I vomited
and then I flipped the seat down and
sat there and just looked at my
hands and I still remember this
vividly saying to myself,
well, you've ruined another night
for yourself. it's literally fps
russianite in a titty bar there's 30 hot women out there you've got so much to talk about you're
on half the fucking tvs and you're so drunk you can't fucking stand you've ruined another night
with fucking alcohol nice fucking job like i'm in there like like talking down to myself for like
accepting all this free alcohol and i remember i remember when you came out and like maybe a bit after that you
hung out and you were cordial and you're like all right i'm heading out and then like obviously
everybody who was there with you was like all right we're heading out and i remember leaving
thinking like there's so much more fun to be had you know everybody's blowing him here it's great
like why are we leaving i didn't know you were
that fucked i had had all the fun there was to have to have i was vomiting on the side of the
car on the way back yes i did not know that that's and then i don't know if it was that trip or a
different trip but jeremy was there and uh the owner of the bar whatever was a fan and uh and
and he he wanted me to sign his AR-15.
And he had it in the back of the restaurant.
We went back there.
I signed it and everything.
And then we stepped out the back door in the alley.
And we're all smoking cigarettes.
And he's like, hey, you want some free beer?
Because he's a bar owner.
So he's just got infinite beer.
He's got like, you want a case of beer?
And I'm just like, no, no, I don't want a case.
And Jeremy goes, I'll take it.
Can you imagine?
Right.
Jeremy, he didn't say that.
It wasn't for you.
He's not just giving beer away willy-nilly.
He's giving me beer.
In fairness to Jeremy or whoever that was,
you should have just taken the beer.
I can't.
Just be like, hey, thank you so much for the offer.
I appreciate it.
Accept it graciously.
So that I can give it to Jeremy.
I'm already paying for Jeremy's drinks.
Jeremy would come on those trips broke.
That's my favorite part about Jeremy.
We would go on a trip that was literally that,
that thing I described earlier where we drive to Phoenix,
Arizona and back.
Like,
I don't remember how many days that is.
Like,
like if you did it a straight shot,
it's like three days back and forth,
but we're not doing a straight shot.
We stop it in new Orleans and partying for a night and Houston and partying
for a night.
And then we're working along the way,
you know,
we're working a few days in Texas,
working a few days in New Mexico, days of shooting and uh he brought no money like none like like
twelve dollars like the amount of money that a child gets out their velcro wallet
and like this is their life savings in there they've got like a 10 that they got for their
birthday and they got two ones they got for cutting the grass allowance yeah he brought two weeks of a child's allowance with him on this like
what an end day journey and it's like and this is a guy who has a cigarette and red bull addiction
so i'm always just fucking like like yep yep go get your pack of smokes go get your pack of red
bull because i'm not really i'm paying him like shit tier money that's a very expensive thing to be addicted to red bulls expensive as shit
and cigarettes are expensive as shit yeah yeah he's probably he's probably not drinking
two red bulls today he's probably drinking continuously that's part of why his teeth
are all rotted out of his head but um but like you know you got to consider like
the hat i consider that hazard pay i felt like i was getting a great deal. It was a symbiotic relationship
because we get to New Mexico
and somebody's got a holding exploding
target in their hands while I shoot it out of their hands
and, alright,
can we not put the full pound
of explosives in there? And I'm like,
yeah, we'll do three quarters of a pound. You'll be fine.
Yeah, Jeremy, I got you a
16-ounce Red Bull,
one of the big ones when you
oh well that's fucking a good nail they just got shot that shit out of his hands
well uh do you guys want to call the show yeah yeah i suppose so i really enjoyed uh having
arian on i did too i wish woody i i'm excited about wo's trip. That's, that's, that's fucking cool.
I'm glad you're doing the thing.
I hope you do the Atlantic cruise one day.
Cause you've been wanting to do that for so long.
Oh,
that sailing one.
Yeah,
maybe,
maybe this will,
uh,
kickstart adventures.
Yeah.
All right.
PKA 535.