Painkiller Already - PKA 593 W/ Hutch - Elon Musk buys Twitter, 1800’s Medicine, Depp v Heard
Episode Date: April 30, 2022...
Transcript
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pka 593 our guest is the legend hutch taylor this episode of pka brought to you by lucy
goat.com and of course lock and load the premier orgasm improving cum increasing supplement brought
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that peak orgasm is increased because you know it feels best as the as you're coming
and it makes
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you see someone tweeted at me a couple days ago like someone commented over some other bullshit
you know cum supplement saying like is this something people even want more cum and so i
master tweeted him or whatever that's called code pka use a real
product gorilla mind so check it out but yeah you can uh we should send you some some cum sups we
should that should be like a standard guest thing a sample of that yeah it makes you come farther
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Does it increase your sperm load too?
No.
No, it does not.
It increases your seminal fluid.
And we've said before, the perfect world is pearlescence.
You'll have a pearlescence to your semen that it previously didn't have.
If you've ever looked at your snotty cum and felt inferior, we can fix it.
Oh, yeah.
Be sure, like, start taking this.
Don't tell your fiance about it.
And she will bring it up to you after about three weeks, guaranteed.
She'll be like, what's wrong?
We're still coming the same amount.
You're still coming the same amount, but you're busting huge.
You need to go to the doctor, is what she'll say.
Well, it's a little concerning that you're egg're egging me on to to sin uh we're waiting till marriage so but but when
we do start making love then yeah i think that we could do that that's fair
i'm doing well thank you guys for uh inviting me on i was a bit surprised to be honest but yeah
it's good to know we love you good to good to catch up with you guys. It's, it's, there's something kind of comforting about sort of reconnecting with people that
were there in the ground floor when this whole, um, gaming internet thing got started.
There's like a camaraderie there.
Like no matter what, like I have love for people, even like wings and, and you know,
people that still to this day talk shit about me.
Oh, wings is on the way.
He'll be on in a minute.
That would have been great. I really would love to talk to him actually when's the last time you you like spoke obviously not face to face have you ever
have you met man like face to face no no no i've never met wings it's an experience i mean
maybe maybe maybe get jot that one down put that on the bucket list but
when's the last time you talked to him like online like video like this like a
conversation voice to yeah let's do that yeah it would have been like 2012 fuck
yeah that's a different man it's a different man well I heard that he's
like he's doesn't he married now and as now? And isn't he going to take care of like stepkids too? So I'm glad that he found, um, dog stability. I think that's great.
Well, no, I mean a brand, we don't want to go into the whole wings thing. I want to talk about
you, but you know, more things happen today. His life is very interesting. There's always
something. What was the downvoted thing? Oh yeah. I guess I'll do it. Um, June King,
the June King is a YouTube channel. He made that part.
One video of Wings, they had like 2 million views.
Fairly fair.
He does his research, and he doesn't seem to have a dog in the fight.
He made part two today.
We're featured a few times.
But I guess he pulled up.
Wings tried to defend himself on Reddit at one point.
It was one of those threads when they were calling him maybe a pedophile or something.
Which he's not.
Which he's not.
To be clear.
And he laid it out in like two sentences.
Like, hey, trolls do this sort of thing to me.
You should know that I've said a lot of stupid things, but I haven't done any awful things like this.
But, you know, that sort of like sentence type thing.
And he's like, this became one of the most downvoted comments in Reddit history.
It is still to this day and it's like he like pulls up a top 20 list and like there's wings like 8 000 and
something down votes like within an hour or something crazy what did he say in the comment
he defended himself he said i'm not a pedophile basically reddit gets it right again. Was this the PKA subreddit? No, no. This is I am a total piece of shit.
Oh, gotcha.
So what?
So a bunch of trolls successfully convinced the people on that forum that it was real.
Well, you know, this goes back to that stuff where they were posing as him and like going on TikTok and Instagram and like going after people and threatening their kids.
You know how certain topics are like
that will drive that person to insanity you tell a veteran that he's not a veteran he will go insane
like like okay like he'll start pulling out cards and fucking proof and shit so they did that with
like wings face attached like you're not a vet i am i was in world war ii yeah i'm a world war ii vet
and this see that's a funny joke. Stealing valor.
From the outside, it kind of is.
But then this guy's got like his own.
He's like, this guy's the real liar.
Here's my fucking number, and here's where I serve.
And he's like losing his shit.
So they're trolling people in Wing's name, essentially,
with everything from like stolen valor to pedophilia
and like making lots of people angry at him.
And it was part of that whole thing.
No, the video came out today, if anybody's super curious.
It's an hour and a half long. I don't want to do
wings talk. I really want to do hutch talk.
I was just curious how long, because you talked about
you mentioned him, and it came
to mind. It is good to
talk to
all the people that are from way back
then.
Where's that guy who camps?
I haven't heard from from that
little guy in like a 15 years or something dude he was remember he was like one of the biggest guys
in like 2010 he felt like he was one of the first guy i remember like hard scoping everyone in the
community and being so jealous when people would hit a hundred thousand subs and i remember having
like 17k or something and he had like 102 and being like god
to be a king like that and then he just peaced out like i it's funny you brought him up i checked
his channel like within the last six months he just like quit he's up to like five videos in
the last decade just cash not even cashed out i found out this is years ago call it like 2012 or something like
ages ago um he was gonna do like this he'd taken a break he was gonna do a comeback video that was
a hit piece on me just because everyone made hit pieces on me back in 2012 so i called him i had
him on skype which we all had at the time and i was like hey uh i heard about you what's up and
we talked for like 30 minutes or so.
I just gave him the actual background
to all the things he was going to talk about.
He was like, didn't make a video.
It was going to be all wrong.
That's good.
I still associate that with his name.
I'm going to fucking take down Woody.
Why?
I don't even know you no there was uh there
was this like it was a by today's standards it was such a tiny community but it seemed like
it was gigantic back then like like uh like i'm sure you all remember pj like yeah and his remember
pj gave you like your first hd capture card and then you played with him and then everybody was
like pj's pretty cool let's watch him. And PJ's like, yeah, I'll make
video. Sure, I can afford a second capture card.
And then you'd play
with PJ. He watched his gaming
stuff for a little bit too. He put
the clips together and everything. Yeah, I remember all that.
Yeah, and I remember
he was a compulsive masturbator.
So you'd be playing games with him.
Yes! He'd be like,
I need a break. I gotta go jerk one out real quick.
And we'd be like, what?
That's like a joke that dudes will say when they take a shit or something.
Oh no! He would?
But he's like, no, I have to go
masturbate in the other room furiously.
During Call of Duty games
are like eight minutes long.
During the break between games, he'd go rub one out.
I remember I'd talk to him.
So back in the day, there to be skype calls that happened all the time and you know there'd be between like three and eight guys on it i'm on a call there's like four of us he's one of them
and uh he's like all right i'll be back in a minute i'm gonna go jerk off and then he comes
back and like i don't know 10 minutes later and we're all like really like you you that that you
just did that and he's like what yeah it's a masculine thing what's the business it's a masculine
yeah that was his explanation it's a masculine thing we had to leave this lobby full of easily
killed retards you had to beat off dick 10 minutes is nothing though you guys are acting shocked like
you can't oh no 10 minutes oh i absolutely can. It's just that I think that if I'm
going for some sort of jerk-off session,
let's light some candles.
All right? Let's treat ourselves
right, okay? This is about us.
I don't want to immediately come back to
talking to my guy friends right afterward.
I want a refractory period from that
as well.
You don't want to come back and be out of breath?
I'll be like, wow, sorry I made you guys all wait in Vermintide. I had to beat off. from that as well. You don't want to come back and be out of breath.
I'll be like, wow, sorry I made you guys all wait in Vermintide. I had to beat
off.
I came 30 seconds ago.
You came so recently that you're like,
sorry,
my pants rubbed. I'm still sensitive.
Does that supplement that you guys
plugged help with refractory periods as
well, or is it just the volume common it's the volume and the volume the like consistency and pearlescence
pre-com and the pre-com apparently eyes into it and the yeah i was about to say that too like the
the distance the velocity that's wow we also all do a lot of pull-ups too so we got strong cores
so that might be part of it too like like like we we are we are flexing that jizz right out of us i could poke a child's eye out
pull it's the ultimate core your children survive
thread what are you what are you doing the most downvoted reddit comment in red industry
well i'm glad you guys brought up the fitness thing because that's one of the reasons why I'm excited to come on is because I've recently begun my own fitness journey.
And so I figured I could get some free tips from you guys.
I don't know how boring your audience thinks that is or if they're into it.
Medium.
Medium?
No, I want to talk.
I wrote it down because I saw on Twitter months ago you were like talking about your plan, talking about lifting weights and how you were feeling better with it yeah now and i always like when i see people getting into lifting because
it's such a positive thing for everyone like you get a lot out of it it's it helps you learn how
to learn to do something you get more mental health out of it than you do physical health as
well just being able to sleep so i wanted to know like how's that going for you are you still working
out with pretty good consistency? Yeah.
So like the last couple of weeks.
So what happened was I had a personal trainer for like six months in from like July to to January of like this January.
And I was going a couple of days a week. So like it wasn't like a lot, but it was like consistent.
So and I did notice an improvement in my life, but I wanted to cut back on some
of my expenses in 2022 and just like, you know, I felt like I was being a bit frivolous.
And so I thought, you know, I can go to the gym on my own if I want to do that.
I feel comfortable with the machines and I, you know, like if I feel comfortable sort
of, you know, figuring out which muscle groups to focus on on each day.
And, um, but then I just kind of stopped going to the gym.
And that went on for a few months.
And then also, like, I started to drink a little bit more.
And I was starting to experience, like, physical consequences from that.
Like, I was feeling very sluggish on most days.
Because if you drink excessively, it'll fuck with your sleep.
And it'll fuck with your appetite and your nutrition. and yeah you're just not going to recover from your workouts
it made workouts really tough and i felt like i wasn't getting a lot out of them so
um i finally decided i saw this it's gonna sound fucking weird but i saw this movie
that literally changed my life i'm not even kidding it's a movie called
um everything everywhere all at once I don't know if you guys have heard of it
but it is now it's a 24 film they're a fantastic studio they make a lot of
really good movies like hereditary and Midsommar I mean they're like one of the
most exceptional I think movie studios out right now and it's just this like
you know not that big of a budget,
$25 million, but it is a multiversal story. And I don't want to give away too much because
I'd really, really encourage your audience to check it out because it's rereleasing at
IMAX this weekend. But, you know, the core message of the film is just to be kind. And
I kind of turned that in on myself, like be kind to myself. And I started thinking about like the decisions I was making, the kind of lifestyle I
was living and sort of imagining what my future would look like if I were, if I were to continue
to do that. And I didn't really like what I was imagining. And so I just really resolved. I'm
like, you know what, let's just, let's just focus on the next 30 days. Let's just not drink.
And let's just start going to the gym again let's just not drink and let's just start
going to the gym again and the first week that I went back I went like five
times like I got really into it and like the the quitting drinking wasn't that
difficult because it was like I was feeling physically and mentally like
better yeah and then like the last couple weeks my body cuz I'm 39 years
old now my body was like you need to to ease into it a little bit more.
So I didn't go five times the last couple weeks.
But when I had the personal trainer,
I really didn't like going to the gym.
It wasn't fun for me.
I didn't enjoy it.
It felt laborious.
And part of the reason is because of the drinking
and not getting enough sleep and all that.
And now that I've cut the drinking and I haven getting enough sleep and all that and um sure and uh now that i've cut the cut the drinking and i haven't i haven't been drinking at all um i started to i started to
actually like for the first time enjoy going to the gym and like putting headphones on and uh just
kind of getting like in that sort of like mind muscle sort of connection thing and i found it
rewarding for the first time ever in my life so I would
say that like one thing I want to ask you guys is about calories because I
have to consume a lot of calories right now because I want to get up to 220 and
then cut from there you want to know how to consume have a subject matter expert on the phone here.
How many calories are you eating right now and what would you like to do?
Well, the goal, if I want to gain a pound a week, I was told by people that like there's a guy who's like a personal trainer that comes in my Twitch chat sometimes.
And then I use this like my fitness pal app.
And so the goal right now is 2750 calories a day.
And for me, that is a lot.
So that would be a 500-calorie surplus a day, though,
based on the math that he wants you to get to.
Yeah, if you factor in the exercise.
All right, so look, he sounds more qualified than me
because all I do is talk to people who do what he does. Right. But the way that we did, what I did is we, I had like a hundred calorie
surplus a day. We tried to ride that. It's so hard because it's, it's a metabolism, not like a gas
tank on a car, but it works on the same principle. I suppose there's just so many other factors.
I tried to stay like a couple hundred calorie surplus because you'll get so fucking fat so fast if you don't, um, over the long course.
But yeah, like, like you've always been so skinny. Um, I mean, if you could choke that
amount of calories down, that's how you will build the most amount of muscle is being at a
high calorie surplus and working hard. But it's tough. Like I'm stuffed, like real stuffed at the
end of the night. night, and especially if
I don't eat enough during the day, I got to cram them all in at night. Like the other
day I crammed in 2,500 calories in the last four hours of being awake and I was like,
oh my god.
It's like douches.
When I eat that much, especially right before bed, I'm not super hungry when I wake
up in the morning. And then you got to start it all over. That's the thing I'm struggling
with most is like it seems to me like if you're hitting your protein goals every day
and you're getting enough carbs that you're not feeling light headed at any point you've always
got enough energy to do the work you need to do then you could fill the rest in with fat so that
would mean like two scoops of peanut butter yeah two scoops of peanut butter. Yeah, two scoops of peanut butter is 400 fucking calories.
Is it 400?
It's 100 a tablespoon.
Okay, yeah, that's what I thought.
So why did you say 400 calories? I use big scoops.
Oh, yeah.
Sometimes I'll eat peanut butter as a snack, like with a spoon.
Oh, that's what I did last night.
Class, see?
That's what I did last night.
I was trying to like, I need to get like 400 more calories. So I just sat there watching Moon Knight just, you know. I did the exact i did last night i was because i was trying to like i need to get like 400 more calories so i just sat there watching moon night just you know i did the exact same thing last
night it's that's that's really funny i was in the kitchen and i was like i'm on my phone i'm like
you're 300 fucking calories short boy i grabbed i grabbed a thing of jiffy stood over
the sink and watched tv while i like hate spoonfuls of peanut butter. We had identical evenings last night. Yeah.
I'm drinking a lot of kefir cause I,
like I was reading that that's like a really good source of like good macros.
It's like good carbs and good protein and good fats.
And do you guys know what kefir is? It's like kind of like yogurt.
It's like a liquid, it's like liquid yogurt basically.
I've never had that. No. Is it Indian? I don't know. I don't, I don It's like liquid yogurt, basically. I've never had that, no.
Is it Indian?
I don't know. I don't know.
It's spelled with a K, right?
Yeah, K-E-F-E-I-R.
But you take kefir grains, which I don't even know what those are.
You can make it at home if you want, but I buy it store-bought.
But you just drop it in milk, and then you leave it in room temperature for a couple days, and boom, you have kefir in it.
And I'm lactose intolerant, but it breaks down most of the lactose in the milk. And so it's actually
fine for lactose intolerant people. But yeah, if I drink two cups of kefir, it's like 300
calories.
You're lactose intolerant. Can you do whey protein?
No, I got to do plant-based protein. That's what I'm using right now.
Yeah, yeah.
That sucks.
I don't know.
Whey is so much easier.
I've heard varying things on the different kinds of protein.
Well, whey is the most quickly absorbing protein.
That's the word I'm looking for, yeah.
What's the benefit of it being quickly absorbed?
What do you mean?
After you do damage to your muscles, you're trying to get those amino acids into the muscle fiber as soon as possible
so that you can get the most rebuilding and most efficient rebuilding of that muscle fiber um as possible um that's what a lot of
performance enhancing drugs are about is like it's that rebuilding process it's like oh time to go to
work i just imagine little dwarves inside my arms with pickaxes and stuff and uh the steroids they've
got now they got jet packs and shit it's like that uh what's that galactic game where you're
space dwarves now and you're you're fucking yeah like like that's what's that galactic game where you're space dwarves now and you're
you're fucking yeah like like that's what my dwarves are like you've got like those fucking
snow white and the seven motherfuckers like they're doing i ho i ho when you told me like
the first time about like stuff you're on the the trt and everything you were like no taylor you
got to do it see in your body you damage all that muscle And a guy goes in there hung over with a little chisel and he starts repairing in my body.
Now there's a legion of guys and they're using both hands to repair me.
And I remember that phone conversation explicitly because I was like, I said, we're building a house.
Yeah, I'm building a house.
And now all my guys are allowed to work overtime.
We got rid of that pesky union and now they're slaves and they have to repair the house.
Yeah, that's the exact uh like metaphor i used i was like it's like we're both building houses taylor your guys only have a hammer in each hand we use hammers we got we got
two or three my guy grew an extra arm it is it is quite remarkable though the the difference that
it makes that it's made for me in terms of like my emotional and mental and physical health, like all three of those things.
As soon as I cut the drinking and just started like really committing to it, it made a huge
difference because I think like all of us have probably had like a tough couple of years
for like different reasons, you know?
And I just hit this like bottom like a few reasons you know um and i just hit this like
bottom like a few weeks ago where i was just in this real like negative self-pity place
and it's been it's been a while since i've been in that kind of a place and uh you know i'm lucky
i have this like really supportive fiance where you know we both like you know we're really good
for each other and she she said exactly what i needed to hear you know like she recognized the
spot that i was in and
then, you know, also, you know, reminded me, you know, like you're capable of like getting out of
this. And so like, I, you know, I took that to heart and then the combined with like the movie
that I watched, it just sort of inspired me to like, try to be a better person. I was like,
you know what, let's just fucking do that. And so I just, I've been coasting on that momentum now
for a few weeks. And, uh, it was like right away, immediately. Like I felt like I've been coasting on that momentum now for a few weeks and it was like right away, immediately.
Like I felt like I could be like a better fiance.
I felt like I'd be, I was more productive with my job.
I felt like I could think clearly
and like not get clouded by sort of negative emotions
that sometimes I have a tendency to get bogged down on.
And you know, it's made such a huge difference for me.
And I'm really hoping that this this like I know that you plateau sometimes and maybe you
backslide you got a sort of like summon the will to to to to you know power
through when you get like that like I'm not naive to think that it's just always
gonna be like this but I'm really hoping that this lasts for a while cuz like
I've been very motivated uh very naturally
motivated to continue with it that's great the mental health benefits are a big deal for me
that's actually one of the core reasons that i do it part of it is the more longer extended term
thing i'm just feeling good about myself you know like i i have a paramotor flying coming up
but i like holding my chin high and knowing that maybe i look better than i did the last
time these guys saw me like that feels better than anyone else who's
there
does anyone there look as good as you Woody
I think there's younger
people there but are
they as fit
stop it
so the other part is the
more short term like like hutch
mentioned you know we have these down moments
I will straight up hit the walk you just put some sneakers on and walk in the sun as like a pill i pop almost because it
picks me up effectively yeah that's a big deal i like to staying motivated can be hard um i like
to envision like there's like this puzzle on your table. And if the, if the pieces are all laying awry,
like it's not that tempting to go sit down and go to work on a puzzle like
that.
Yeah.
But if you can get the edges up,
at least if you can get the edges of that puzzle up and I'm talking about
how you structure your day and what the things you do in your day are about.
If you start laying the edges out,
the framework for that,
for that puzzle early in the day. And by if you start laying the edges out, the framework for that puzzle
early in the day, and by the time you get to midday, you're starting to fill in some
other stuff.
And by the time it's the end of the day and it's time to work out and go and actually
do the part that sucks, there's only one piece of that puzzle missing, dude.
It's so easy to go sit down and finish that shit at the end of the day and go in there
and lift hard.
Yeah. sit down and finish that shit at the end of the day and go in there and lift hard yeah and it's
good for like at least for me there are some days where like shit goes like like at work or something
like something stressful or something out of your control happens and you like it would be a day
where you would feel that like when you lay your head on your pillow like this is a shitty day this
is a loss of a day but if you get that workout in you at least have like something positive where
you can be like look back like like, yeah, you know what?
This was a shitty day and I got in there and I did it anyway.
And you get like a little confidence out of it, like like you're practicing your discipline, like your disciplines, like its own muscle.
Like the more times you opt to fuck off with working out, the more easy it is the next time you want to fuck off.
Because, hey, I've missed five in a row. Who gives a fuck? Is a sixth one going to make or break me?
fuck off because hey i've missed five in a row who gives a fuck is the sixth one gonna make or break me whereas diet is like i struggle so much with my diet with that because i will eat like an
absolute asshole all weekend and then monday comes around and i've got like pie in the sky dreams
about like eating salad and then like that night comes around it's like well you had pizza two days
ago and yesterday why not have a bunch of cheeses for me for me when you get into that mental loop
and frankly it's i think it's easier for smarter people to get into than dumber people
but um i i just do um to like talk yourself into something right to if you're smart the smarter
you are the easier that is um and uh i think although you could argue that you're smarter
yeah in any case it's it's what i not going to listen to this guy in my head.
I know he's not that smart. Well, no, that that is that I think that is a form of intelligence.
And you and you develop that intelligence a lot better as you get older, that that that ability to sort of reason within yourself.
And I like what you were talking about, about having like this clear goal, like even if you have a loss on a day,
I like what you were talking about, about having like this clear goal.
Like even if you have a loss on a day, you have this really simple, clear goal that that's always worth pursuing.
Like it's never not worth it to pursue like physical health and mental health.
And so, you know, like if I get stressed out about it, people can get stressed out about anything like family and relationship stuff and finances and jobs. And like one of the best things that you can do for yourself
in any of those spots is to get right with yourself
to the point where you can think more clearly
and make better decisions.
And that's the way that I looked at it.
It was like, okay, well if I'm stressed out about,
you know, like all these like different things going on
at the same time, you know, the best thing I can,
like literally the best thing at the top of the pyramid
that I can do is to get
My mind right and so it gives you this really clear goal
It's not always easy to like summon the will like some days you just don't want to go but like
But it is it is very simple and and it and I feel like it for me personally
I'm not speaking like I'm an expert. I've been doing it for like three weeks now but like but welcome to the internet career out of that are you kidding me um but yeah it's it's um it's given me it's given me
a uh more clarity of purpose and and that's you know that's valuable i think that's a very
valuable thing do you ever watch any of those motivational videos? I don't like those for the most part.
I love them.
I love them.
Like what?
Like saying that you're good?
I look at motivational videos affect me so strongly that I'll think about, I treat them
like hard drugs.
I'm like, whoa, we wouldn't want to do that every day.
That's crazy talk.
Who knows what might happen?
But like, oh man, I think today i need a motivational video
that's how i treat motivation just find random ones on youtube no i've got some favorites um
one of my favorites i pulled it up who are the good ones uh my favorite one uh all right so
arnold's great talking about his whole journey right like like like but there's this guy yeah
there's this arnold has like montages of them. They've been
like, like his speeches have been built, uh, into most motivational videos with like triumphant
music built around his speaking points to the point where you're like, you've got like goose
pimples or whatever they call them in your, in your land. And, uh, but this guy, less, uh, less
Brown, I don't even know what he does other than being a motivational speaker. I really like
his. He says, imagine if you will, being on your deathbed and standing around your bed,
the ghosts of the ideas, the dreams, the abilities, the talents given to you by life,
and that you, for whatever reason, you never acted on those ideas. You never pursued those dreams.
You never used those talents. We never saw your dreams. You never used those talents. We never saw your
leadership. You never used your voice. You never wrote that book. And they're standing around your
bed looking at you with large angry eyes saying, we came to you and only you could have given us
life. Now we must die with you forever. So you watch demotivational videos. Jesus.
No, the question is, the question
is, if you die today, what ideas, what dreams, what abilities, what talent, what gifts would die
with you? And so motivation through fear, dude, I thought, yeah, absolutely. I like fear and I like
accountability. Um, I think that a lot of people today are afraid of accountability. A big part of what I did, I am scared of Derek.
Moreover, I'm scared of letting Derek down.
Kyle's not memeing.
He mentioned many times in our texts, like, I don't want to upset Derek.
I feel like dog shit, but he told me to add an extra 20 minutes of cardio.
Is Derek your trainer?
Is that who that is?
More plates, more dates on YouTube.
Derek's a YouTuber.
He runs more plates, more dates on YouTube. Derek's a YouTuber. He runs more plates, more dates.
He was on Rogan recently.
He does steroid talk and natty talk.
He does a lot of stuff on his YouTube channel,
but he's a gigantic human being himself,
and he owns a TRT clinic,
and I partnered with him to do my whole transformation thing at the end.
I was like, yeah, it's fucking Derek's clinic,
and Derek's tutelage has allowed me to do all this stuff that I did.
So for a long time, he funded a lot of the stuff that we did and uh and so that put into me this real sense of like that's him on the screen right
there yeah that is yeah but but i just decided like like i i i sort of entered into like a
contract with this guy, a verbal contract.
And I told him, I'm like, I remember exactly what I said.
I was like, you tell me what to do and I won't skip a fucking rep.
I was like, you don't understand what we're about to do here.
And he's like, no, no, I got you, bro.
And then we started that day.
And that was sometime in April or March of a year or two years ago.
And then a year later, we were done.
But there were so many
times when it was awful. And like my main motivating thing was the accountability of like,
Derek wants to know what we weigh on Monday. And depending on what we weigh on Monday,
we are going to either cut some of my few calories out, cut, add more to my cardio or both.
He's already told me that's what's coming like that was hilarious he would like
dehydrate himself on sunday night so that he could make weight on monday to avoid the cardio that
would come as a consequence i would dehydrate myself i just wouldn't have a big drink that
night that's okay i just i wouldn't i wouldn't just spoil myself with water
there were times when he was dehydrated Woody, do you remember getting the pictures
in our WhatsApp where Kyle would send us
like a shirtless or like a tank
top gym update and we'd be like,
dude, you're looking enormous.
Congrats, you're looking great. And then the next
message would be like, I showed it to Derek
and he said, my progress is disappointing.
I have to work harder for Derek.
He never said that, but it would be like, okay, we're on pace.
It wasn't until we got to the end that I got any kind of a compliment from Derek.
And it felt so good.
I'm like a dog to him, I guess.
Because when he finally patted me on the head, I was like, so I really felt like I'd earned it.
Like, because if you think I'm ripped, that's cool.
And I appreciate that.
I value your opinion.
But if he thinks I'm ripped, that's his job.
That's his job is identifying people on the Internet who are ripped.
And like, I don't know, I sent him a picture and in a group that he and i have with it's me him and some people from the clinic and and and he was like that's like an anatomy book
picture because i remember that and like that that might be the best compliment i've ever been
given this is my this is my favorite compliment let me jump in because kyle's glowing right he's
so happy and he says derrick says my skin is like dick skin
this is tight
low body fat skin we're talking about you put some fucking fat calipers on my penis and i got none
yeah i love it i love the intensity i i really like the i i'm not a wishy-washy guy with things.
It's hard for me to do a little diet.
Oh, yeah, in six months from now, we'll have lost that 10 pounds.
That to me is insanity.
I would much rather just beat my ass into the ground for a month
and knock 10 pounds off in a month, which I can – it's super easy.
Oh, that's not easy to me. I average two pounds a month for
two, for three and a half months. You said two pounds a month just now.
Two pounds a week. I'm sorry. Oh, you were gaining two pounds a week.
At first I went up and then I lost. So I bulked for eight months and then I cut for about three
months to do what I did. So for eight months, I add calories more and more and more.
I started at 2,500, and by the end, it was 3,500, 3,600 a day.
And I'm just eating white rice and beef for the most part and veggies.
So there's no like –
Yeah, there's like a giant chili pot amount of bison and rice.
Does your stomach gradually expand to the point where you can you can accommodate that
a big part imagine thinking that and i would i think i would throw up probably i hit it from
every angle with something like that right like so my goal is to um make sure that my my diet is
built around being digested quickly so that i can get to that next meal right um i'm taking 10
minute walks after every single meal not only only for the cardio effects, but to work on insulin resistance and, and like hasten that digestion again,
white rice goes right through you anyway. And I'm also just like on the verge of vomiting
by the time I finished each meal. I'm all of those things are true at the same time.
And also gut health, things like the amount of yogurt I'm eating and some of the other
stuff that are prebiotic and probiotic in my diet that are all meant again, to digest things quickly and
efficiently so that I can be capable of eating 3,600 calories a day. And then like, that's not
crazy. Like a lot of like professional bodybuilders eat four or 5,000 calories a day.
The rock didn't eat like 8,000 or 9,000 calories every day.
That's hard to buy.
Frankly, they're not eating as they're not eating the same diet I am.
I think that they're getting a lot of calories
from places like fats.
You would have to.
And they're also bigger human beings, right?
I'm a goat compared to their cow at this point.
Some of those guys are different species.
They're transhumans.
Michael Phelps, what was his...
Remember that big thing in 2008?
That's propaganda.
That's propaganda.
That's propaganda. Is it propaganda. That's propaganda.
Is it?
When he was working out, look, if you work out hard all day and swim, I'm sure we'd all eat 4,000 or 5,000 calories.
The fact that he can tack on 3,000 or 4,000 more isn't that impressive.
Well, the guy who trained, fuck, what's his name?
I'm kidding.
I'm kidding.
I know.
All these numbers are wrong.
These people aren't burning 8,000 calories a day.
The thing is exercise doesn't burn as many calories as you think.
Even a guy like Michael Phelps burns an extra, like, what, 1,500 maybe?
Yeah.
And that's a big number.
Regular people exercising are burning an extra 250-ish.
Sure.
So these eight, 500-ish?
I have 500 a session.
I believe you.
Yeah, yeah.
But 500 a session doesn't do anything to enable a 6,000 or 8,000 calorie day.
It doesn't.
Yeah.
I'm so dead.
So for me to burn 500, I have to run a 5K on an elliptical with resistance.
It sucks.
Have you guys heard of the I'm
sure you have the Northman that just came out mm-hmm so Alexander Skarsgard
yeah that's a good yes Alex is an Alexander Skarsgard the guy who trained
him said that he only he has a policy with the people that he trains where
they only train for one hour a day because he has this philosophy where
you're not gonna get your your basic it's like diminishing returns so I know
that's all I do you only do an hour a day as well.
Yeah, it takes me about an hour to get done.
If I take a little extra time, it'll be an hour and a half.
But I'm not doing three-hour sessions almost ever.
Like two hours, two hours and 15 minutes if I'm in there just killing myself.
Alexander does steroids for a lot of his stuff.
He's one of those guys who does the chicken and broccoli lie.
So like all of them?
But he's got a physique more akin to yours, naturally.
A very lean physique.
And if you look at him from
True Blood until Tarzan,
it's just
real hard for somebody with that type of body type
to pack on that muscle. I would imagine
without some steroids.
He got ripped for this movie holy
fuck he was what's it called the northman the northman is by a guy named um roger eggers he
directed the witch and i'm very excited for this movie yeah he's not ripped in these pictures
he still looks i mean like i mean he's pretty ripped in that but but like he's like big big
now that that he like So this is Tarzan.
And I would call this ripped.
Maybe Kyle wouldn't.
But I would call this pretty.
Dude, it's huge.
Yeah, that guy's ripped.
Pull up an image of him in the Northmen.
To me, he just looks good in this portion.
He's like 6'4".
But to me, I see this as a...
Now, this is not ripped to me.
Well, he's covered with fake fake blood and stuff he's looking pretty
yoked i don't know i don't agree with i just it was ripped i took his caption too i think those
fucking ties are between his deltoids and buys to create something that wasn't there before dude i'm
getting some of those i want my forearm for like my eyes he's definitely big in that movie he does
not skip trap day no
the trainer said that that was like more like a trick of the camera and the way he flexed himself
oh yeah like the downward angle with the light yeah oh i wanted to ask i roll my forward going
up too higher if you want them to i don't i know we don't want to stay on it you'll be you'll be
like one of those guys from that super mario movie eventually but uh how did you pick like
what weight lifting you're doing?
Are you just doing what the personal trainer laid out for you?
Did you go to like bodybuilding.com and just like print out a plan?
Like what are you doing?
No, I don't know.
Like I said, like I could be more organized about it, but like, you know,
like in my head, I'm like, you got like arms and chest and you got core,
you got legs, you got, you know, back and shoulders.
And so like, I just try to focus on like two muscle groups every time I go.
Like, I don't like, I like to take my time with the gym. time I go Like I don't like I like to take my time with the gym
I don't you know like I like to take a lot of time in between the reps like I'm not rushed or anything like that
You're speaking my language
Yeah, because I'm fucking old as shit. I'm just tired and so it takes me a while to recover to a point where I can do another set
So like a lot of times I'm only doing like one exercise every ten minutes
I'm just really just sitting there and like listening to an audio book. And so I'm
only doing six or seven exercises each time I go. But I was reading that you're supposed to get
between 12 and 18 reps of a certain muscle set each week if you want to get the most out of
the muscle growth. Yeah. They have volume recommendations. His name is Jeff Nippard.
He has a couple of good videos on that about total volume distribution and i'm yeah very very smart guy jacked out of his mind he's like five five so that helps but
i mean like you don't imagine you don't go to the gym for two weeks and look like five five
it doesn't matter he's five five but he found the hottest five foot three girl on the planet right
like yeah that guy's forearms are like a woman's calf, like a strong woman's calf. He's huge.
But like, yeah, you want to I would tell you definitely do a push, pull legs structure and follow a routine that someone else makes.
So that the way that is, all of push day, that's just going to be your chest, your triceps and your shoulders.
All your work will be pushing.
The next day is pull.
That's back, biceps and, of course, shoulders. I'll say say that and then legs is self-explanatory but it's just it structures
it better and three days on one day off like you still have four days in between like a push and a
push even though you're getting more total volume like maybe send me a dm on twitter with a link and
i can check that out because i do sure i'll send you something man i'd appreciate that yeah um but
but it's hard hot I gotta tell you
it's difficult for me like I'm you know I'm not a short guy I'm like 6 3 and so
my arms are quite long really quite long and so push-ups for me are real hard
yeah and a bench press bench press I do it I can do 105 maybe you know like five
reps and I have to tap out because and I taught you know my trainer was telling me it's like literally because you have longer arms you have to and the same with
the push-ups it's like it's a lot harder for you than like the short guys that can that can go in
the gym and get like a lot more out of there so it's definitely true it's just a harder mechanic
it's a harder thing to do mechanically like my arms aren't as long as yours we measured them a
while back because i was curious how i stacked up against John Jones or something. I think it was like 75,
was it? It doesn't fucking matter.
But yeah, definitely it's harder.
We're pretty scientific about how
we do the workout thing.
We've got... I'm sure
we've all, in one form or another, have a little book somewhere,
a notebook, where we have each...
We do this push-pull leg rotation.
It's very fine-tuned. We know
what we're going to do on every single day,
the amount of reps of each exercise,
and exactly how much weight is going to be applied.
And it's easier to keep track of that than you would think.
Once you write everything down,
then all you've got to do every day is some very simple additions to that.
It's the way to get bigger and stronger the fastest.
And a lot of people would say,
yeah, but I'm just trying to get in there to get healthy.
But the thing about motivation is if a month goes by and you can't visually see any difference and you can't and you can't prove any difference with a piece of paper, then why would you keep going?
It's so hard to do to do something that's hard for a month and seeing nothing come back your way and then say i want
another month of that but if you can put a month in and you can be like all right that's different
wait long game though i'm not thinking like i i you know i i don't have any illusions about like
significant gains in the first like couple months i'm really like thinking in terms of i'm thinking
in terms of years you know i'm like trying to imagine what i'll look like it's different than kyle in this way because kyle's like if you don't if i go a
month and don't see results then you know it's not motivating me i i guess i never really expected
results i was just trying predicting failure and i just sit there and lift away and i'm like
pleasantly surprised when anything good happens. Yeah.
No, I felt that as well.
I was really more speaking to someone who's a beginner who's trying to, for the first time,
get into that Spartan-ish lifestyle or however deep into it.
That's what I like to do.
Kyle likes to have gay sex.
Yes.
Spartan.
Forced upon me.
By an older warrior.
By a bigger, more jacked guy.
Just as the Spartan.
It created the most effective fighting force
that this planet has ever fucking seen.
I doubt that's true.
We're talking centuries of battles
without a single loss.
It's written down.
I think that 12 Marines could take out
the entire Spartan army.
I think the Marines have lost a time or two in the last 50 years.
Rome kind of pushed their shit in, right?
Not according to what the movies I've seen.
These are Greeks.
These are Greeks.
I just, all I meant was, you know, I like to look into it.
I watched both seasons of Rome, so I'm pretty knowledgeable on this topic.
I saw 300.
They lost that, Kyle.
I think Rome was great.
I mean, the elephants were a problem all of them.
Rome was good.
When C-3PO showed up, I was out.
There's so many.
We live in the golden fucking era of content
because there's so much good shit to watch
all the time like there if you want to watch fucking shit about um startups oh this is a
great time for that you can watch super pumped about the uber guy you can watch uh the dropout
about elizabeth holmes um i don't love jared leto typically but he's he was in this apple plus show
called we crashed and man he was so good in Plus show called We Crashed. And man,
he was so good in that. And yeah, so I don't know. Do you guys watch a lot of TV movies?
We watch far, far too much TV. I watch everything. I'm about to say... So I was on
probation of one kind or another and then prison and out and everything for so long
that I really didn't want to get any
programs illegally from the internet because that just seems stupid to do.
But I'm getting-
I can't imagine.
I'm almost tired of paying for all this stuff.
I'm going to need somebody to talk to me about that Plex thing or something because I am
just paying so much for so little these days.
I'm done with Netflix.
I've been a paying customer for so goddamn long.
I was getting DVDs from you cocksuck all right all right but if you're gonna tell me i gotta pay three dollars extra a month
so that kitty can keep watching on my netflix i'm out i'm out yeah but they do come out with like
uh probably like six seven or eight like really good shows every year i'm waiting on those the
overall quality of their original programming has kind of diminished as of late.
Has it diminished or was it never good?
No, no, no.
I mean, they have some terrific shows.
Like Maniac is a limited series with Jonah Hill.
Oh, I like Jonah Hill.
Yeah, I like that.
You don't know Maniac.
I know Ozark, though.
That's very good.
Ozark, I didn't get into that, but a lot of people really love it.
Ozark is the best show on Netflix.
We love Ozark.
Yeah, I got to go back and give it another shot because like i just got kind of bored like it starts with
this like breakneck pace for the first season i'm like fuck holy this is so stressful and then it
just really slows down by the end so i thought we disagree so much we think season two is better
than season one yeah i think the show keeps getting better i'll have to go back and give
it another watch so like queen the last Gambit and Making a Murderer and –
Making a Murderer.
Oh, and how can you think the Tiger King?
How can you forget the Tiger King?
The Tiger King is one of those moments in your life like Kony 2012.
Kony 2012, yeah.
That are just like these stupid fucking like, yeah that thing happened too like if you were
telling your life story like if the like if your life flashed before your eyes there'd be great
moments with family and friends and then there would be the tiger king like yeah yeah and that
happened too did you watch the um the the peacock show where they they had uh they actually like
did like a dramatic reenactment of everything i I have Peacock, but I didn't watch it.
It's pretty good.
It's pretty good, yeah.
Queen's Gambit was good.
If you're talking about original Netflix stuff,
Queen's Gambit was really good.
I liked that.
I was watching Queen's Gambit, and I enjoyed it.
And it was probably like three quarters of the way through the show
where I'm like, I can't believe I never heard about this.
And I looked it up, and it's a totally fake story and i genuinely like was less interested after i learned
that it's loosely based on bobby fisher but obviously it's yeah they embellish quite a bit
but yeah the whole bobby fisher versus the the russian chess machine at the height of the cold
war is such a fascinating i was so into insightful story. I bought a chess kit.
I started learning a little
and playing. I live streamed
myself playing chess.
Everybody pushed my shit in
so hard I don't think I've played again
since. Hutch is a real
chess player. Did you
beat the speed guys in
New York? How did you do?
New York? I made up the New York part but I think I remember you how did you do york i made up the new york part
but i think i remember you playing in public a guidance guys who do this all the time the park
oh no well those guys are they're really good at um the guys that play a lot of like speed chess
and you got to pay three you got to gamble three bucks to play that's how it was in san francisco
when i did it a couple times okay but they're really good at, or they're really knowledgeable on particular openings
where there's lots of traps,
where it's difficult to avoid those traps
if you only have a couple minutes or three minutes.
And I didn't do very well against them.
But I cut my teeth learning chess
against these really old conservative guys
who I got along with really great.
But the banter was wonderful.
Conservative politically or chess wise?
Yeah, it was just, I was like a fish out of water at this coffee shop that I went to because
everybody was like 55 plus and like pretty conservative.
I thought you meant they like never pushed their pawns too far forward.
They played a really scared game.
Very defensive minded.
Yeah, that's what I was trying to say.
Anyway, yes.
Sure.
Yeah.
But, but, um um but i got really motivated
because um i wanted to i just i got i hate losing i can be kind of competitive if if i feel like i
can improve at something then i'll get really motivated to try to be better at it and um uh
i was like that with chess i just hated losing to these guys because i fucking loathed their
politics but i was like a lot younger and younger and a lot more angry about stuff.
And so I just kept practicing, kept studying.
I familiarized myself with the Queen's Gambit.
That's like I play D4 when I play chess white.
And that's opening up.
What does D4 mean?
So there's 64 squares on a chess board,
and the center squares are E4, E5, d5 and e4 if you push as white that
typically leads to more open positions that are a lot more aggressive there's a lot more traps it's
a lot more perilous if you don't know what you're doing and d4 is a bit more conservative you can
you can kind of like you know lock the pawn structures and play more of a slow long game and
and um that that even though like i'm kind kind of too aggressive when I play COD,
and that's why I fucking suck at that game,
but when I play chess, I like slower, more positional games.
But it's an infinitely complex game,
and if you study it, then you can improve substantially really quickly
if you study just a few basic principles.
And if you play somebody
who doesn't know what those principles are you're gonna win 99 of the time um so that's probably why
you had such a tough time in the beginning is because like you were playing against players
that are familiar with things like you know occupy the center king safety space time tempo all these
things and if you if you're unfamiliar with them you're just you're gonna have a hard time but in order to do that
You got to study. That's why I like it's easier to do when you're younger
You're more receptive to learning you have more time if you get older. It's like you got shit to do you're tired, whatever
It's it's it's much more of a commitment
I think later on in life
But I was fortunate enough to play in a tournament at twitch rivals tournament and it was called a hand and brain tournament
And so, you know these people like me would get paired up with some of the best chess
players in the world, like the Botez sisters and whatever.
And I got paired up with Hikaru Nakamura, who's like literally like one of the best
chess players in the world.
He's like top five.
And it was such an incredible honor.
I mean, really, there's only like 1,200 grandmastersters in the entire world so these people are like wizards gandalf status
of uh of wisdom and well there's only one gandalf let's get that straight
i played in this um tournament with him and we won and it was like one of the fucking coolest
experiences of my life it was such a incredible honor to play with it was so much fun how did you were playing against the other guys partners not against the the grand
master so it would be like i was the hand and so the way that it worked was um the brain who was
he caught well i was my partner he would he would tell me which piece to move but he couldn't
specify which one so if he said night he couldn't tell me which night so if there's two nights on
the board i had to kind of figure it out yeah he would just say night and then i would make a move with the
night and he would say pawn and that that's how it went down and so um yeah it was were you afraid
of disappointing him yeah i was so nervous like one of those chess tournaments that i played i
played in a few i did pretty well in all of them. But one of them I was in the finals.
I made it all the way to the finals.
And I won one, I got first in one of them,
but I came in second in another one.
And the one that I came in second in,
I was so incredibly anxious and worried and nervous
the morning of that I was like, I couldn't eat breakfast.
Cause my, like if I get nervous, I can't eat.
Like some people it's like the opposite. They like want to eat a lot when
they get nervous. Um, but I can't eat. So, uh, and I was like literally dry heaving in
the shower, like I was so fucking nervous. It was like, I don't know why though, but
yeah, for some reason that just really got under it's adrenaline. It was adrenaline.
Yeah. That's what it was. And I was and i i beat him the first game and
then he beat me the next two games so i was like ah and i i almost beat him the third game too
but it's a super rewarding game and it helps with self-esteem too because like if you can
if you can apply yourself and improve at something then you're gonna think better of yourself and
that's gonna give you confidence and to do other things too like well okay well if i can learn that
then i can learn to speak spanish or i can learn to you know cook whatever weightlifting's like that too you know you can
set those goals and and and do similar things you were talking about media though like we really are
in a golden age i feel like there's so much like fan service like when i was a kid like
this this stuff was scarce like i'm i guess i'm really thinking about like comic books for a
second more particular in particular but man they're just it was saturday morning cartoons that's when i got
my little taste like batman and spider-man and i guess i was sort of aware that comic books existed
but in my little town there was no place to get those they weren't even at the grocery store like
i don't know where comic books i they weren't a thing. Did you grow up in North Carolina? No, Georgia, Northeast Georgia.
But now, I just watched that new Spider-Man movie,
and I got three Spider-Men that span most of my adult lifehood
because Tobey Maguire was Spider-Man when I was in high school.
And I've got three Spider-Men flying around the Statue of Liberty like saving the universe from like all the Spider-Men villains at the same time and I'm just
like this is so fucking cool like like like like I hope that like 12 year olds who are watching this
are like also starry-eyed like wide-eyed watching three Spider-Men spinning around too because
we didn't get three Spider-Men we just got the one and he didn't do
shit when andrew garfield spider-man saves saves mj in this one i fucking legit got emotional i
was like oh fuck oh yeah that made me feel feelings holy shit i couldn't believe it i cried yeah i
cried good feelings bad feelings when a movie makes me actually feel feelings i'm impressed
i'm a pussy when it comes to these movies.
I'm really sensitive to those triumphant moments and stuff come from behind or, you know, when the good guys come at the last minute.
And it's not cliche necessarily.
It's like, oh, they're here.
Yeah.
And if the music's done just right, like, I'll cry like a fucking baby.
I cried a couple times during that Spider-Man movie when they're on the rooftop and they're all talking about
how their uncle Ben's died I'm over there there was a part where like so it
was the first part where they said with great power comes great responsibility
and I did that little thing we go no don't cry don't cry because I cry a lot
of movies too I really do i like and i just want to
bring it back to everything everywhere all at once let me just make one more pitch for you guys um
the movie will make you laugh hysterically for the first hour and 20 minutes because it's absurd
it it it it revels in absurdity as sort of like a comedic device but for the last 45 minutes straight i'm
saying 45 minutes straight i i was i've saw it twice in theaters and i was sobbing for 45 minutes
straight i had never had a movie everything everywhere all at once and um you know i left
the theater and i thought to myself is that
the best movie of all time like i had i had that thought and then you know i looked at online and
what people were saying and i'm not alone like there are a lot of people that are like that is
the best movie i've ever seen i'll look into it for sure i like a24 and um i i really like um um
it's escaping me and i literally just watched a whole 30 minute video about it what's
the one with the little girl that does the hereditary hereditary i love hereditary it's
it's grown on me at first i hated it at first i did some are i liked it less but it's it's
really it's that man it's those both those movies do this thing where it's sustained
uncomfortableness this this
uncomfortability or whatever like you just tension you cannot like sit comfortably in your seat for
the duration of the movie because there's always something so odd and yet benign happening at the
you're just oh oh oh his next movie he he he um his name's ari aster and he's like
quickly becoming one of my favorite
filmmakers because he's just so creative and unique but really smart guy his next project
he described it as a four-hour comedy horror film and i was like yes pump that immediately and
i don't care what that guy does um uh but but what i was gonna say was like i cry i cry like i get
emotional in movies especially as I've gotten older.
I'm like a little bit more comfortable being like vulnerable.
But I still have that instinct, that urge to, especially if I'm not by myself,
like I'll watch a lot of movies with my fiance.
I'll like want to hold those tears back.
Yeah, for sure.
I don't want to cry in front of her.
It's so exhausting and stupid. I. I don't want to cry in front of her. Oh, let me tell you.
It's so exhausting and stupid.
I wish I didn't have that instinct and I just felt comfortable.
I don't know if it's like a macho thing or whatever.
No,
you're protecting her.
My dad's a real stoic guy.
Nah,
if you were to speak with a therapist about that,
I bet when you got to the bottom of it,
you're protecting her.
I take a different vibe on it.
I blame her she should
make you feel comfortable she should put you in a place where you can do this right like like when i
think about the environment i try to create for my girl it's like she should feel comfortable
and reassured and know that like whatever she's doing it's okay she needs to give that to you hutch that that's
part of her role no she she's not taking it he's not my it's not like she went pussy what the fuck
like that didn't happen she's reassured me she's reassured me so many times like afterwards she's
like i could tell you wanted to cry why don't you just cry i'm like i don't i don't i don't
it's hard for me to yeah right reverse that instinct's so deeply ingrained. I'm like, she needs to put her head on his chest
and give him the it's okay.
She does though.
And when she does that,
she will come over and like, you know,
grab my back or whatever.
And even then, I'm still-
I didn't like that.
Get your hands off me.
Don't touch me.
You know I don't do physical touch.
She knows.
You don't do physical touch?
I can't do physical touch.
How does that work in a relationship?
Jesus Christ.
I'm joking.
No, I think, like, I was trying to explain to a girl about Rose Namajunas,
about her last three or four fights.
And it's really inspirational.
And it ends with her taking her belt back and beating this badass motherfucker again and then
like she's doing this like self uh is it self-aspirational is that what i'm looking for
stuff before the thing where she's like i'm the best her her boyfriend slash trainer's like who's
the best i'm the best who's the best i'm the best and you can tell she means it like she's not just
repeating words she's she's she's she means it and She's not just repeating words. She means it.
And she goes in and fucking kicks this badass bitch in the head in like 30 seconds and knocks her the fuck out.
And the whole crowd melts down.
All of her loved ones are there.
She's crying.
Joe Rogan's there.
She's like, before the fight, you were saying something over and over.
You said you're the best.
And she's crying.
And she goes, I am the best.
And it's beautiful.
And she is
seven pounds of gold around her waist that proves it i remember when she beat joanna
joj check that's like close enough 90 right i know that can't be a name
is your j check anyway uh she beat her and then like no one could believe it no one could believe that she beat her because
she was the champ she had so many defenses joanna did and uh when she knocked her off her throne it
was outrageous so they gave her an immediate reach shot immediate uh match yeah and then she beat her
again and afterwards she goes you know like i'm just better and it was like, you actually are.
You are. Go, girl.
She's this little, cute,
white girl with blue eyes
and a shaved head.
She doesn't look like a fighter.
She's the baddest motherfucker in her weight class.
She's a little ninja.
She's a fucking ninja.
She got dropped on her head.
They were tangled up in a half-ass submission type
whole thing, and the other chick dropped her
upside down on her head, and it knocked her
unconscious, and then she had to take a year off.
Was that the woman with HGH
head? Who is that?
She does have a large head, but this is a much smaller weight
division. Her name's Jessica Andrade. You're thinking of
Cyborg? This is a different Brazilian
on steroids called Jessica Andrade. A different Brazilianian on steroids there seem to be a lot of
brazilians on steroids in ufc yeah they can get away with down there because usada doesn't want
to make the flight let me let me let me tell you let me pitch you one more time on everything
everywhere all at once you guys remember um the goonies and uh and uh junkie indiana jones in the temple of doom oh yeah if it's like the goonies i'm Jones and the Temple of Doom.
If it's like the Goonies, I'm in.
The little boy that's in both of those films.
So he...
The Asian kid.
The Asian kid, yeah.
Dr. Jones! Dr. Jones!
I can't remember his name, but
he's in this movie.
And this is the first movie
that he has been in since the goonies
and uh what happened no no you laugh but it's a it's a really beautiful moving story and jamie
lee curtis is in it as well i mean like and michelle yo it's it's just such a phenomenal
oh i like the cast all right dude i'm gonna watch the movie yeah i'll check this out so so uh this
kid you know he was watching all of his peers that were in these like eighties
films, you know, like, I can't remember their names off the top of my head. Woody, maybe you
would know more than I would, but Corey Feldman, maybe like, like, like, uh, like that, like that
crowd, like that, you know, like the, the, the kids, he was watching all of his peers get these
auditions and get all these roles and become these superstars but there
weren't a lot of roles for like asian guys back then and um so eventually he just gave up and
didn't want to act anymore and he moved into uh directing like stage plays i think or something
like that and i think that's or teaching acting and he had been doing that for like decades you
know like two decades or three decades or whatever and then crazy rich asians came out and it just it became this like cultural phenomenon and made
you know i don't know hundreds of millions of dollars and so he said he got fomo watching
that he's like oh you know like i want to do that and it made him want to like get back into
acting so he calls this guy and asked him to be his agent like would you represent me and try to
get me some roles?
And the guy said, sure.
And he called him two weeks later with this role,
and he auditioned for this role, and he got it.
And so, like, this kid, you know, who's like this iconic,
you know, he had these iconic lines from these movies,
these iconic movies from the 80s.
You know, he comes back 30 minutes later,
and then he makes, you know, he's a part of this project,
which I legitimately believe it's like,
if it's not the best movie of all time,
it's like easily top five for me. It's subjective, of course., which I legitimately believe. If it's not the best movie of all time, it's easily top five.
For me. It's subjective, of course.
I'm going to watch it. I need something to watch for the weekend.
So I'll check it out.
Just fucking do it. I'm begging you guys.
No, I'm going to do it.
It's in theaters now.
I'm not doing that.
You don't have to do that, but it's coming back to us.
When it comes out, I'll grab it, though.
I'm going to steal
it.
Jesus,
what did he really mean?
I'm going to
steal it online.
I'm going to pirate this.
Yeah, Kyle, that's a good thing to do.
Do the shotgun cocking thing when you say other stuff.
I'm going to steal this
movie. I'm too paranoid i mean i
think uh i think probably all of us had our pirate patches on at one point during the wild wild west
of the internet but i don't know if it's just me i'm a naturally paranoid guy and i just assume
the worst is gonna happen so i don't i don't pirate anything anymore basically look i'm a
very safe guy the only sketchy thing i do i order drugs
off the internet that's it that's it yeah there's nothing wrong with that it's legal
i wanted to ask you guys how you feel about smoking weed before workouts but i don't know
if that's a yeah so i smoked no not at all um so i ordered my delta 8 off the internet now it's so
funny that like i was at my dad's place and i was like all that trouble was because i had my friend mail me like 14 grams i was like i ordered
this off the internet this is delta eight it's 100 legal it gets me just as high and it costs like
pennies like it's so cheap is that like cbd or is it similar no they've they've tinkered with
the molecule and they've made like all sorts of acronyms. And I, I, I barely passed chemistry,
so I'm not going to get into any,
any made up nonsense,
but I smoke one of the three or four acronyms that seem to really get you high
that they make out of hemp.
And you can,
and it costs like a couple bucks per gram to like get.
And so you can get like a hundred grams for like a hundred,
or not a hundred grams.
You can get it for the more you buy,
the cheaper it is.
So you can buy this stuff very cheap and then you
just put it like a vape pen.
I love getting high before I work out.
Yeah, I do too.
It's like my favorite thing.
I love getting high and
smoking weed. It's fun.
I've tried it
many times where I'm like, I'm just going to get a little
high and then go work out.
It takes me off a little bit like i like to almost save it towards like let me tell you what i do
i like it as like an end of the night thing like when all when everything i have to do for the day
is like is done then i'll i'll do it and it's like oh all right now i'm like enjoying it feeling
relaxed i like to do it before i have like a big something to do it doesn't i don't get anything
out of it so i'm not smoking it to get uh relaxed right like i just i kind of want like i want magic the gathering arena
to be more fun and so i no no i'm talking when i work out lately because because not only do i do
i like to smoke but i'll also take like all my caffeine stuff too and get like all like like
pinprick uh like pupils so that i can go in there angry and hungry and do stuff and And then I got my TV playing the scene where Iron Man catches the hammer and stuff while
I'm doing leg curls.
He breaks his arm and he cinches it back together.
And I'm like, I could do one more.
So I try to go all out and try to motivate myself as much as possible.
And part of that's being a little dopey, I guess, so I don't get distracted by something
else. I don't think it's a bad thing it's just up to the person
yeah everybody's body is different like we doesn't necessarily relax me so um like when i
for me the experience is like i feel like i'm more in tune with like what we were talking about
before with like the mindcle connection thing. I can
feel more specifically which muscles are being pushed to the limit and it helps me focus.
But some people, if they smoke weed, they're going to want to get lazy and they don't want
to do anything. So it's not going to work for them.
Do you take TRT yet? Have you done that?
No, I don't think I will. I'm not judgmental of it, but I'm just, you know, never say never.
I don't know.
But like, it's not something that I'm thinking about right now.
Fair.
Have you ever gotten your testosterone tested?
No.
It's, you know, it's, I think it's, what I would say is it's not healthy to have low
testosterone.
That's the only thing I know for sure.
Yeah, well, that's true.
So I don't know.
I feel really good.
I'm not trying to bald anymore, though.
I told you about the finasteride.
We were talking about the thing before,
but I have a little bit of a horseshoe situation here,
but it's kind of leveled off.
And I'm afraid if I introduce more testosterone into the situation
that it's just going to be.
Absolutely.
But if you go like really Mr. Clean level bald, that'll be motivation to get really jacked.
Because bald jacked guys look tremendous.
Especially if they can grow like good beards too.
Yeah, and you can.
So you're in the mix if that were to happen.
No, that would be a concern.
Like I said, I would take the finasteride as well.
I do take the finasteride.
Is that a pill or a cream or something? Pill. You got to start on the finasteride you'll keep your hair forever
it doesn't have any negative side effects it's so cheap it's a little i'm gonna let myself get like
two-thirds into a costanza and then start taking god damn it you get so hard there
you know that's a terrible idea oh i know i i don't you're doing great my dad has a bunch of
hair his hair is fine now the point is keeping what we have now and never taking us we're like the fucking space
marines never a step backwards god damn it no yielded ground we're here we're here all the
follicles up there they're with me right now they're all going we're here but you don't want
like too aggressive of a hairline who was it pa Paul Ryan? There was some politician who had the hairline of a seven-year-old boy.
Because young boys, their hairline comes down so low.
Maybe it was Paul Ryan, maybe it was someone else.
Ronald Reagan had a good hairline like that, too.
Had a healthy head of hair, that guy.
Remember that picture of him curling 13 pounds?
Yeah, Paul Ryan has money.
Ronald Reagan is usually the guy I call out as having like a just amazingly good hairline.
For his age, 100%, yeah.
Yeah, he had great hair.
For any age.
His hair outlasted his brain.
Can we get a, see if it's as good as I think it is.
Zach, a Ronald Reagan picture, please.
It definitely colored that shit.
Oh, yeah, yeah, he colored it.
He was strong.
He had a strong hairline for sure.
Yeah.
Solid hair. Oh, there's, who's the alpha male guy on YouTube? yeah yeah he colored it yeah strong he had a strong hairline for sure yeah solid hair
oh there's um who's the alpha male guy on youtube we've had him as a guest before
he might be alpha male right i don't remember he talks about like the the hair stuff and exercise
right look at that hairline wow that is powerful hair guy's like 77 years old in that picture
guy's like 77 years old in that picture 77 years old out of his mind but look at that hair yeah but he's got the hairline of a high school kid it's solid he's like there's like an unfinished
lego set right off screen oh come on that man won the cold war single-handed yeah single by
himself with that hairline it's called breakonomics we're not going to get into this
you fucking commie
it's called breakonomics
it's going to start trickling down any minute
please no
I'll surrender
just another 30-40 years
it'll get to us eventually
it's interesting you bring it interesting i'm at like an interesting time time in my life because
obviously like i was really plugged in with with politics stuff for like the the trump era and
it was tied to what i did for work so even though like
when i reflect and i look back on that time I think about all the wasted time because I spent a lot of time consumed with things that were amount of time thinking about it or upset about
it or worried about it and i finally you know it's a process everybody goes through their own process
of like figuring out whatever lessons they need to figure out and so this this year for me you know
over like the last like seven or eight or nine months i've I've started to come to a place where I'm still interested.
I still try to be informed
and I still talk about it sometimes
and tweet about it sometimes.
But I'm moving to a point
where I'm really starting to think
about the concept of time more.
I've had a similar journey,
but not quite about the time.
I used to be, I still watch politics. I stay informed i try to do my thing during the trump era i would try to convince
other people i feel like nationally everybody was right whether they be red or blue everyone
was trying to get other guys to see the error of their ways and i would do it the thing is when you're the fact check guy you spend 10 times as
much effort as the bullshit guy did right then the bullshit guy just throws crap on his facebook page
maybe some photoshopped image and then you have to find the real image find out what happened
and you know break all this down so that's what would do. And then they would still not change their minds.
They'd be like,
okay,
okay.
I'll admit this one thing about like,
for example,
the Trump said,
I'm a Philadelphia Eagles fan to some extent.
I don't follow closely,
but he's like,
you know,
I don't like a football team that kneels.
And it's like,
literally no one kneels from the philadelphia eagles zero
people have ever fucking kneeled on the philadelphia eagles so trump implied they did that's bullshit
and then he's like well you know what staying in the locker room during the national anthem
isn't any better why did you say that they've never done that either you're implying they did
that no i had to go right he's good did he do that yeah these are true things he's good. God, he's good. Did he do that? Yeah, these are true things.
He's a fucking lying sack of shit.
He's a fucking – for all the things Trump has done well and not well.
That proves how smart he is.
He's a liar.
He's a master liar if you want me to get to come to your side, okay?
But it's so – all the time, everything he says is lies and untrue.
He's about to release his health care plan. I know. It's two weeks away, right? It's cominguths. He's about to release his health care plan.
I know.
It's two weeks away, right?
It's coming.
Any day now, he'll release his health care plan.
Oh, they're coming.
NFL players are at it again.
Taking a knee.
Oh, my God.
Get ready, man.
He's coming back.
Well, that's irrelevant.
That's where I was headed with all this.
I would sit there and fact check and disprove the bullshit that would come from his side, which takes so much more time than just saying, hey, waiting in the locker room is not any better.
And I never changed a mind.
Never.
Can I say this?
Can I jump in?
Think about it.
Some of the minds that you were trying to change knew that it was all silly.
to change knew that it was all silly like that's a big part of like the trump movement is that a lot of people like trump because he stirs people up and a lot of the people that
are getting stirred up are people they don't necessarily jive with it's like you're giving
them too much credit you're giving my facebook feed too much credit these idiots oh well that's
a different story i don't think i thought of twitter well maybe twitter and and certainly like you said like you know there are people who enjoy different story. I don't think it's Twitter. I thought it was Twitter. Well, maybe Twitter. And certainly, like you said,
there are people who enjoy the metagame.
But you can't change anyone's mind about virtually anything.
You can change my mind.
You've changed my mind many times because I'm very
open to having my mind changed. And I'm sure we've
all changed each other's minds.
I got in shape because of you.
I'm sorry? What?
I got in shape because of you.
Yeah, fitness. I thought he said I got in shape because of you oh oh yeah fitness i thought
he said i got in at first too and i'm like no i can't be right because that doesn't make
any sense i was trying to i'm sorry one of the areas in which it influenced me was fitness and
you guys collectively were like one of the one of the inspiration like there's a lot of people that
got but you guys are collectively one of the ins especially you woody i saw somebody came in
my chat posted a topless picture of you i was like jesus fucking christ so like that was one of the things i get graded on a scale i love it
that i drew from i was like god damn okay well you know what like this is this is something
that's attainable i started thinking about it differently i was like oh i think i can actually
do this but yeah what he just what he does like the same workout program that i do that
taylor also does it um woody's diet very close
to my diet like i'm sure he's got his chicken and pork because he doesn't want to go insane eating
ground bison for a year but like um you know you don't have to go insane like that who fucking
cares about your micronutrients if you're if you're insane at some point i do unfortunately
but no that's a year of him grinding and he like went from somewhere where
he was just like i'm not too happy with this this isn't really cutting the mustard to like god damn
like like in a year it's it's really impressive but going back to what you said a minute ago it's
also like a game of whack-a-mole too because even if you do manage to change like one person's mind
and it it happened very infrequently but sometimes in the
many many many ludicrous ludicrous amount of twitter arguments that i would spend my time
doing i still like do it sometimes like nobody's perfect but like for the most part i don't really
do it too much anymore compared um but it even in the rare occurrence that you can change someone's
mind it's like there's 10 more people just waiting in the wings
just to repeat something that is like...
I do like how I prove them wrong, but not change their mind.
If you prove them wrong and don't change their mind,
that seems unfair to me.
You know, like, oh, okay, so that wasn't true,
but things like that are still true.
It's like, well, shucks, how do I beat that?
It's like my favorite line from A Brother Where Art Thou?
We're not one at a time in it here.
We're mass communicating.
That's how you should treat ideas and thoughts like this.
You should do what we're doing right now.
If there was an audience out there screaming back at us,
this just wouldn't fucking work. You just have to listen to what we say evaluate and if you care enough to have your mind
changed you'll go and do your own research and maybe it will maybe you'll even see that we're
idiots and and you'll get that down too you'll be like oh good thing i didn't take him at face value
but i've changed my that's on you i've changed my mind about a few things that really really in the
like the last couple of years and it's not easy easy. Like you, when you, when your ego and your, and, and your,
and your personality, the way you see yourself is, is tied to, um, I don't want to say an ideology,
but like, uh, sort of like a social media, like political identity. It's really hard to,
it's really hard to make that be like a
malleable thing like that's not a malleable thing it's like a really rigid thing and like that
that doesn't mean like i still have like principles i believe in so i haven't i haven't i don't think
i've like buckled too much on like what my priorities and goals are but um certain certain
things certain like specific facts I've been scratching my
head over the last couple years like was I thinking about that in like a way that
wasn't really correct maybe it's like and that that it's difficult to
challenge yourself and do that okay you're sure go steps in and doesn't want
to because then that means that all that time that you spent before defending
that position that was possibly wrong was a total fucking waste of time and
nobody nobody wants to think that way.
I think,
I think that's one of the reasons why it's difficult to get people to change
their minds when they're really digging their heels in on a certain thing.
And even if you present them with counter count,
like data or evidence or whatever that blatantly contradicts what they have to
say, it's still difficult to break out of that.
You can cut through that sometimes if you present someone with real clear ideas and then ask them what they think about those ideas or those notions.
But if it's ever got the brand name of a particular site attached to it, or it's one of those bills
that they've given some trendy name that makes it sound more palatable, or God forbid, the opposite,
name that makes it sound like more palatable or god forbid the opposite it's been given uh a name like the the death tax or something like that for example although it is a death tax fuck you
don't steal my don't take my money um i don't know anything about that no i don't either uh
it it just depends i don't know yeah and i mean like it's also important to remember like online
or i guess not even online face to face and like sitting in person in particular and you're having
a conversation it's much easier to reconcile with someone because you're like this is a real
individual sitting there this is a person with thoughts and ideas and feelings like okay i
understand where you're coming from maybe i disagree but okay we'll leave it there now we'll
talk about something fun whereas the internet especially text- where you're coming from. Maybe I disagree, but okay, we'll leave it there. Now we'll talk about something fun.
Whereas the internet, especially text-based,
you're so removed from the reality of the individual on the other side
that you just can be an absolute merciless cunt
and then just be like, whatever, who cares?
Everybody else is a retard.
And sometimes I think of it like, because I know this has happened to me,
where someone will tell me, like, the universal health care was a good example.
Like, seven years ago or whatever, more recently than that, I was like, just had in my head, like, oh, that's bad.
That's a bad thing.
Why?
I don't really know.
It'll cost too much money or something.
And then, like, it was over time, just, like, reading more about it that, like, it wasn't a one-day thing.
It was just over time.
Like, yeah, this doesn't, these arguments don't really make sense we're already paying for
the health care that like what do you talk a bunch of people are going to get it for free
and it just kind of evolved over time into a different belief system you know
maybe that's a bad example plus you just got to have a hospital and you saw how well the current
system works right well i mean it really it worked well because you know i was sitting there with an arm
terrible service terrible uh like the waiting room sucked like the doctor it okay that's fair
the doctor did suck yeah i took the stitches out i've got my derma all over it right now
because so you can't really see much it's all all covered in white. It's like a scar cream.
And so I'm putting this all over it.
What's the COVID shot?
It's going to look gross.
Moderna is the COVID thing.
Moderma.
Like dermatology.
Is what you use to get rid of scars.
Put it under your head!
Which is which? The ma is the scar one. is what you use to get rid of like scars. Woody, Woody, Woody, come to your head. Witch is witch.
Witch is witch.
The ma is the scar one.
Wait, I was it wrong?
I was right, right?
Yeah, you're right.
Hopefully this shit works.
Yeah, Kyle,
now that you said that, Kyle,
yeah, you're right.
They did fuck me over.
I didn't mind being triaged
in the waiting room
because like there were
old people dying and shit. But like they did they're i'm gonna have a
nasty ass scar now because of how bad they stitch me together no the way it looks it's gonna be
fine i have a pretty gnarly one like here my finger because i got some substandard care when
i was like 12 or 13 and i just remember my mom when i got home was like hey what who did that
to you like like she was so indignant she's like. She's like, that's the hand you'll have your wedding ring
on. Even at 12, I was like, we'll see about that.
Tomorrow's the first day I can work
out again. I'm excited. I have a huge incision
right here that they covered up super well. It's like a hairline
now. There's a big difference in someone who knows what they're doing and someone who
doesn't like like my uh my doctor was a plastic surgeon before he did what he was doing so he's
like oh i don't even need to bring anyone in it's like you're not gonna have scar and he's just like
the person who sewed me up was practicing on a corpse 45 seconds before that's like it was
they did such a bad job if you care about your scar get plastics
so um jackie she likes her collarbone and uh she didn't want like a big scar on it and like like
you mentioned this guy had done plastics before he did ortho yeah and we trusted him before he did a
good job but yeah bring in a plastic surgeon it probably won't even cost you more you're probably
hitting your deductible on this anyway.
If you care about your scar,
ask plastics to sew it up.
Yeah, it's a whole thing.
And I think Americans get a bad rap for being rude,
but I think in that setting,
when I'm at a hospital,
I'm trying to be polite to them,
even though I'm paying them $200 an hour right now.
No more!
If you could envision the money literally leaving my pocket it would be a steady stream of fibers like like like like i um like i i was cutting i should be asked for what i want
i was um cleaning a knife and i i i i was cleaning in a stupid way and I like lost my grip and the knife
just went like right kind of just sliced I still have a scar right here um sliced right into my
finger it was a deep cut and uh I didn't have health insurance at the time so I was but I but
I knew I'm like I haven't had it I don't remember the last time I had a tetanus shot this definitely
looks like you need stitches or something and so I went to the emergency room and and all they did all they did was clean the wound and put
superglue like like whatever the the hospital superglue that they use and you
know and then you know healed pretty pretty pretty quickly and then I got a
bill in the mail for $3,000 whoa there's some superglue just for some superglue
and just cleaning the wound
it took maybe 20 minutes for them to do that that's wild is that la for health insurance the
next day actually well thankfully now it sucks when you're like you know self-employed creator
because it's like you can't join a pool of uh you know like an insurance pool and oh maybe that's
the next business right do we do we need an insurance program for creators well a twitch
recently like there was a bloomberg article that came out where they're talking
about proposed RevShare changes. But one of the things that they've been talking about it for,
I don't know, eight years. But there's some people at the company that have been pushing
the company to have some kind of health insurance program, which would be huge. There's so many
services that I think independent creators could benefit from if if there was just some kind of
catalyst so like push people to do it i i want so much coverage that like a hot tub streaming
girl can slip and fall injure herself and now she can't get it now she can't get her tits out
anymore so they have to now she's getting paid she's getting paid during her time for recovery and her hospital bills.
I want that.
Every American deserves that.
Do you guys get pissed about that?
I fucking respect the hustle.
About the titty streamers?
No.
I guess like – I mean I don't have kids,
so I'm not really worried about my kids stumbling over on Twitch,
but I bet there's some – the only thing that's a little bit weird is like
are there parents who think Twitch is
a video game site for children
that they can just turn them loose on, and then
the kids find that weird avenue to
girls licking ears and stuff?
I guess that's a concern, but I don't have any kids
so I don't give a shit, and plus I would know to lock
the thing down.
Although kids got a phone.
There's probably kids Twitch.
Yeah, is that like Netflix where you can click kids and it doesn't show any sexual stuff? I mean, if they got a phone, they're like kids twitch yeah is that like netflix where you can click like kids
and it doesn't show any i mean if they got a phone they're getting in though dude like we can get
anything you want through a phone um yeah i don't give any thought to the titty stream but yeah i
guess i i guess i appreciate the hustle um they get there are people that are very angry with them
like a lot of like i don't want to generalize too much but it sure seems like the incel crowd just does not like yeah it's just they don't steal any nobody who watches my streams is
watching those so i don't give a shit that's the weirdest thing it's like they'd be i'd have 500
more viewers if the fucking teddy streamers weren't here now they'd be beating off to me
well that that sure this woody streams coming
exactly that wouldn't happen
but I'm going to do a stream where they donate to
clothe me
please put it on
$35
for a shirt
no shirt
just tweaking your nipples
yeah I don't know maybe it does cut into
maybe somehow it does cut into their money like like i know that
like when i was making videos there was this reply girl who would like make this quick video of her
where they're like cleavage out like like like if my video was called like watermelon explosion
hers would be called re-watermelon explosion and her she copied my description and my tags
and so she'd get to be in the related videos. Now, why do I care?
I don't care that she's making some money.
Do your thing.
I didn't like that she got that related video slot
because if she's not there, it's my shit.
She's literally came in and she's manipulating the algorithm
in a way that takes that spot from me.
And the reason the algorithm works that way
is in case that like, she was like a relevant reply,
or maybe I was like replying to somebody,
so the algorithm's gonna make us sticky,
but I always felt like she was taking a little bit
of something that I would've earned.
This is why I actually think it's a horrible idea
to open source Twitter's algorithm,
like Elon has been suggesting,
because once you open source that algorithm and you Elon has been suggesting. Because once you open source
that algorithm and you tell people exactly
what to do, then
all the content, it's going to be like, you guys
remember YouTube back in the day where it was like
people figured out how to
really game that system.
Those people, pets and animals.
Animals.
Content just got worse and worse
and worse. And if everybody knows how to gain the algorithm
then it's just that i feel like the same thing is going to happen there um there is like an
interesting philosophical discussion to have about like how much power these social media
companies should have and like you know like how how much should we empower them to essentially
manipulate their users but i i think like making it open source is a i don't know what
do you guys think about the elon thing are you guys i was gonna ask you let me lay it out and
ask you this question this way in my opinion twitter has got some of their censorship wrong
two quick ones i pull on a lot there was a time where you could band for saying cloth masks don't
work and now that's generally accepted as cloth masks aren't the move there was a time when you
could get banned for saying covid originated in a lab and now that's generally accepted as cloth masks aren't the move. There was a time when you could get banned for saying COVID originated in a lab.
And now that's generally accepted as an opinion that a smart person might have too.
I'm not saying which is which, but it's definitely not outrageous to say COVID came from a lab.
But Twitter was banning for it.
Twitter was censoring opinions and thoughts that turned out to be right because they were what?
Ideologically opposed to it
were they banning people for saying cloth masks don't aren't as effective or were they banning
people for saying cloth masks do not work period i don't know either way you shouldn't be banning
people they were banning people i in these two instances for opinions that turned out to be on target in the long run i think
so i that tells me that maybe twitter was too aggressive with some of their censorship
having said that some a lot of the people who don't like twitter censorship like online bullying
they like misinformation in a really big way misinformation that's dangerous to the social health.
Do you want to let Twitter decide what is and isn't misinformation?
Because I think that's a terrible thing to do.
Social media companies should not be doing that.
They have their own ideological interests.
I can get on board with that thought process, right?
It's impossible to do it perfectly should they try at all.
There's kind of a Nirvana fallacy in that. Like, hey, they got a thing wrong, so don't do it perfectly should they try it all you know there's kind of a nirvana fallacy in that you know
like hey oh they got a thing wrong so don't do it at all just let fucking morons tell their lies and
suddenly q anon is the predominant opinion on twitter i think that like you could just have
a reasonable terms of service where it's like yeah you can't like dox people you can't promote
violence against people but yeah if you
have a wild take about a conspiracy whatever like that that's what it more should be i think in the
case of twitter they took they they took the steps to uh increase moderation and restrict more posts
or topics when they felt that the the world harm was significant enough.
Now, that's like a subjective thing.
If you ask people what's going to be more harmful, different people are going to have different answers.
But if you look at, I'm not trying to get deep in the weeds in political stuff,
but when you look at like election 2020 2020 and
i mean i think probably everybody in this call would agree that there were a lot of
lies that were being spread and a lot of those lies maybe i'm assuming too much but a lot of
those lies you can draw a direct line between those lies and the events of january 6th which
a lot of people like try to minimize but uh, but that was a significant thing that happened. Huge. And it could have been much, much, much, much, much worse.
Literally, the president tried to stage a coup
to stay in power when he lost,
and they overthrew the government kind of temporarily
to prevent them from certifying the next president.
They took over the building and spread shit on the walls.
Really? Yeah. I didn't hear about it, the right yeah no it's literally a true thing and um you know that we've got guys putting their feet up on
nancy pelosi's desk which i guess is just disrespect but it's also like uh they were
shitting in the halls of congress they were pissing on the walls yeah shit on the walls
and i mean it was crazy. It's a serious America's
government, well, very temporarily,
has kind of been fucking toppled.
And it doesn't look good. It doesn't feel good.
That's ridiculous. America's government
had been toppled by a bunch of boomers.
They were trying to pass a law
and they kicked them out of
the building, took it over, and prevented
it from happening for, I don't know, 10
hours. I made that up. I think saying the government government was toppled i think is maybe like yeah
okay but like but well i mean like it was a significant thing that happened and like sure
and part of the reason why is because but like someone um zach is saying in the in the chat here
they could there there is a possibility of over correction like the hunter by the laptop
thing that was a clear example of over correcting at the same time i'm you know and this might be a
reflection of my own biases but i'm sympathetic to them being very vigilant about about that kind of
thing leading up to the 2020 election because they got so much shit along with facebook in 2016
for not taking um what many people thought were sufficient steps to address uh uh you know troll
farms that were like thriving on spreading lies and confusing people and uh fucking up the discourse
um so you know like yeah like i i don't know if i'm i don't think that no moderation is going to lead to anything or like the way that elon described it
is um he wants he wants he envisions twitter's terms of service to be a reflection of the united
states constitution the first amendment which is like kind of nonsensical for a couple reasons but
like if you were to do that and restrict moderation to is it legal okay you can say it i don't know how that's not going to turn into
4chan in like two months flat uh you know like i i don't think it would and i don't think it
would turn into 4chan in in two months i think that it would i don't think it would be as dramatic
a change as people think i think that more people would just feel comfortable that it would, I don't think it would be as dramatic a change as people think.
I think that more people would just feel comfortable tweeting.
It would probably make the platform bigger.
It is the smallest, most insignificant of the major platforms as far as big tech.
I just, I don't think it would be as big a change as people are saying.
Here's what I hope happens.
I'm just very averse to censorship.
You don't think that you would see like the N-word, for example. You don't think that would be prolific?
You can still find that on there.
It might be more prolific.
Their moderation team,
I mean, it's not perfect. There's a lot of users,
but they
do a lot better job now of
clamping down on that kind of
speech. I just don't understand the
social utility.
How does it benefit us as a society to like tolerate? I don't think it's up to Twitter to decide what benefits us and what doesn't.
Well, I mean, sure it is.
And if Elon, if the purchase goes through, it'll be up to him.
And that's just none done.
We trust Elon.
And who knows?
Maybe he'll run it into the ground.
Maybe it will be an unusable shithole. knows where maybe now people are speculating that it's
not going to happen because like you know he put up a significant amount of collateral in the form
in the form of tesla stock and there was a there was a in like 20 billion dollars of financing
that he got outside financing there's a clause where if tesla stock drops below 40 percent then
they can collect which would drive tesla stock
down even more so like this is like a very significantly risky move and the fact that
he spent the last couple of days like very very openly just like shitting on many people that
work at the highest levels of twitter i'm liking that i do like that now people are speculating
that uh they might not actually go through.
I don't know if it...
Yeah, we'll see.
I hope that he comes in.
I want to bring Trump back.
I hope he brings Trump back.
That's step one.
Then verified accounts and then paid accounts.
Do you really think that Trump would come back though?
Because I don't think he wants to be under the thumb of anyone.
The real question is... I don't think Trump likes the idea
of anyone having any power over him
whatsoever
it's possible that he could come back
but I feel like his ego is so big
that he wouldn't allow that
his own thing sucks
he has that truth media thing or whatever he does
his own twitter campaign that doesn't work
truth.real
my prediction is
that Elon Musk will... Wait, that
happened? Or is that a joke? He just posted that on Truth
today, yeah. Oh.
Well, I don't give a shit about that. Is he photoshopped
in? That doesn't look...
Man, Trump's grass
is so green.
He has a shadow
between his feet, but nowhere else. I think
he might be photoshopped in, boys.
He'd be standing right underneath the sun.
Underneath the sun.
He's like, high noon here at Mar-a-Lago.
Mr. President, get two steps to the left to get you directly under that sun.
So that's a truth network he's posted on?
It looks like Twitter to me.
It's called Truth Social.
Truth Social, yeah.
I like that he used the same name.
It's funny because the way that they calculate a follower account is they do their own.
So if you have like 500 truth followers or whatever on that platform and you have 300,000 on Twitter,
then they give you 300,500 followers.
Oh.
They incorporate Twitter follower account within.
So when you go to their site and look at the follower account, it makes it look like that platform is way more active than it actually is yeah so that's hilarious you can't
just steal your like can you imagine that like you just you write youtube like i wanted to see
if you could change my sub count go ahead and add my twitch in there add my twitter in there
i really i'm really trying to make waves this year. It's ridiculous. It has to look
silly, though, because then someone who has
a million and thirty followers
is going to be getting zero engagement.
If I were Elon Musk,
and the Twitter thing went through,
I would at the same time buy Donald Trump's thing
from him.
In that way, you have paid Donald Trump
to come back to Twitter and do his thing some more.
That would be the thing I do right after I like.
That's a clever idea.
It'd be expensive, but how much is Trump worth?
Is Trump worth a billion?
No, you negotiate it with Trump behind the scenes.
He'll be like, we'll say it's this much, but really it's that much.
And you'll get this much because he doesn't care about dollars as much as he cares about image.
Image is what's important.
Him and Trump don't get along.
If Elon bought
Truth, I don't even know the name of it.
That's how silly it is. If he bought that
thing for $50 million
or $100 million,
Donald Trump would look like the genius
and he'd be getting paid to come back.
It'd be great. He's not going to have to do
anything to get him to come back. Trump and
Elon don't get along but i
don't feel like that's a i'm making this up but i don't think it's a deep-seated dislike that can't
be resolved trump hasn't gotten along with a lot of people and as soon as they go pro-trump it's
fine yeah yeah i mean like i don't think you're gonna have to coax him the peacemaker at all like
he's he's first and foremost donald trump loves donald he's a narcissist and so like you give him the ability to go back and immediately be, once again, the biggest social media account on earth.
He's going to take it.
He likes the attention.
Is that good for Republicans?
Oh, I'm just saying what I think he will do.
I don't know.
You think it's good for Republicans? I think probably more than half of the Republican Congress, Republican Conference in Congress was thrilled when Donald Trump was banned because it made their jobs so much easier.
Do you have any idea how much time they had to spend answering media questions about like how do you feel about this tweet?
Oh, they didn't like their free media coverage getting to talk about core issues then he would he would do stuff like it would be like
a republican running for like a small seat in connecticut and they'd be like i'm not i don't
like trump and then he's like sub tweeting them to 200 million people like yeah well you suck and i
don't like you and you're going to lose and like which is which is funny, but McCarthy are both thrilled that Donald Trump is banned.
McCarthy and Trump.
I mean, it's a tepid, tepid alliance between those two.
Like a strategic alliance.
But yeah, McCarthy doesn't have a high opinion of him, according to.
I've got Trump winning the presidency again.
I think it's definitely
going to happen i don't know win it not he's gonna win it all no he's gonna win it all he's
taking it home um he's gonna be he's gonna get grover cleveland off that high horse it's gonna
be the first two turns three three i mean one was stolen from him he's gonna count that he's
gonna that'll be his thing he'll be to count it the same way Truth Social counts.
Yeah.
He's won three times. He totally will.
Yeah.
He's never won a popular vote.
I'm not convinced he's going to run again. I mean, that might be copium,
but I'm not convinced he's going to run again.
I mean, put yourself in his shoes.
Do you really think that he...
I don't think he liked the job
of the presidency. I think he liked the job of the presidency.
I think he liked the authority and the respect that he thought it commanded him.
And if you look at what his role is right now, what is he?
He's a kingmaker.
There's no risk.
Like, what's the risk?
He endorses someone and they lose.
Who gives a fuck?
Well, they weren't as good.
You know, he will just find a way to rationalize why they lost anyways.
It has nothing to do with him.
He will just find a way to rationalize why they lost anyways.
It has nothing to do with him.
So if you're in his shoes, he just has so much.
He will be the leader of the Republican Party until he dies probably.
And if he tries to run again, I don't know if he can stomach the idea of a loss again.
He won't have to.
Here's what I think.
I think, one, people are going to be surprised how much he aged in the four years he was gone. Holy smokes. Look at him walk now.
Look at him move.
Look at him talk.
I think there's going to be a difference.
Oh, boy.
Maybe.
Maybe long COVID.
But I'm really just thinking that when did he end his term?
He's older than he's fat.
Yeah.
Is he going to 74 to 78?
Is that going to be the get?
He was 76 when he ended his term.
Dude, next to Joe Biden, he looks like an Olympian.
He's spry.
It's not even true. It's true. I don't know. Joe Biden's he looks like an Olympian. It's not even true.
It's true.
Joe Biden's got Mr. Bernans.
Joe Biden does look bad
if you look at the curated clips of him at his
worst. If you look at the curated clips of him at his
best, like riding a mountain bike around campus,
he looks good.
It was real recent, Hutch.
He was riding a bike
weeks ago. How many wheels did it have
i don't want to talk about how many wheels
it's funny though but uh um anyway uh when trump comes back at 80 i'll make that up
pretend it's about right um he is not going to look like we remember what's the point of
this picture you pulled up there's no way this is a recent photo of either of them.
I don't know.
I bet that's debate night.
Wait, who's that guy on the left?
But I think Trump's going to look worse than people remember him.
Hutch brought up a neat point about him being the kingmaker
and really only having positives now.
I was looking at it as, does he really want to spend the money he's gathered?
I think he's looked at all that campaign cash he's he has so much cash now it's like 250 million dollar
war chest i think he likes to think it's just his now technically you're not allowed to spend
that on anything you want but in practical terms i think if trump is gonna y'all are wrong so donald
trump loves going on tour he's like a beetle i bet he has said that privately
i bet i said it publicly i'm like a beetle he's like it's like the beetles have come back i fly
from town to town and they line up and scream my name but just imagine though like a campaign
trail for the midterms he can do that He can travel to all and support candidates in all 50 states in local races.
It's not as big, though.
He can attract a crowd wherever he wants.
Like, that's his super.
They're smaller, and he's not in the fight.
It's somebody else's fight.
He likes that, I think.
And moreover, and this is something.
And think about this one, because he might need that ability
to pardon one more time he might need to get in there and be able to sling a few pardons left and
right statute of limitations are i mean the clock is running he's he's like like you know there
there may be people who are like donald i might have to talk and he's like i'm gonna be president
again don't say a fucking word give me my time like like that could
be on the table somewhere like in a back room right like i think he's being investigated for
anything criminal anymore because there is a new new york attorney general i've got a bet for that
too i don't know i don't think he's i think he's been in georgia they're investigating him for like
that call to brian kemp when he was like i need 11 487 votes you need to find 11
yeah i don't know i've i've i don't i don't even entertain the idea of him being incarcerated
at any point it's not happening that's not gonna happen it's a tease yeah i got i think i got a
hundred dollars that like bet already out there with a little mitt says uh says no charges will
ever go through on Trump.
Maybe a slap on the wrist like they fine him
but then he won't really pay the fine.
Donald Trump still hasn't paid his $100,000
fine. You ever hear that on the news
and you're like,
when I get fined, they come and get me
if I don't pay them.
They play by a different set of rules.
Zach posted it. He currently is getting
$10,000 per day of fines.
I think he's supposed
to show up with
documents that he's just...
Yeah, he's supposed
to give a deposition.
He's supposed to give
testimony, I think.
Roger that.
So Zach says it's tax forms,
a deposition.
In any case,
he's supposed to comply.
He's supposed to help the court
by giving information
about himself
in one way or another.
And now it's $10,000 a day fines.
And you know,
he's just like,
I reject your offer.
Like, you can do that.
You can't do that.
I just am baffled by what he gets away with,
and he seems to prefer to pay attorneys
than anything else.
Americans love a winner,
and you're getting one.
And Donald Trump, 2024.
You got stamped it right here.
What year is this? you're just skipping over
2022 are you guys ready for the show that's going to be like this time next year
fauci will be testifying in front of the 11th gop-led subcommittee in both the house and the
senate we will be in the middle of joe biden impeachment hearings we're going to get to the
bottom of all that we're right in the swamp again all right because we're gonna find out why joe biden hasn't been protected the southern
border of this country not not keeping his uh his oath we're gonna get the bottom of that and
then we're gonna find out who fauci really works for all right yeah it is shit is about to get
fucking crazy if it were fact-based if it were reality i'd be for it i'd be for it but
you know they're gonna be like why is falchi funding the wuhan labs to make covet happen
to secretly take out america why does falchi why did you ask that factual question
why did you choose such a question that we all actually want to answer to
you're skipping over two years of
spicy political wait why why would biden get impeached i just said it doesn't matter it
doesn't matter it doesn't it doesn't really matter they can just do it for any reason you know
whatever fuck you no it's what i just said he's not defending the southern border that's the basis
that they're going to use i think it'll be afghanistan i think they'll say you fucked up
afghanistan you you're they. They've already said something.
I'm going to make it right. We'll restart the war again.
Another 22
years and we can win.
How many people are still talking about Afghanistan?
It's not just
people on the right.
Everybody that was up in
arms about the Afghanistan withdrawal,
nobody's talking about it anymore.
That was my favorite thing that he did.
Ukraine came out,
and I've been watching that.
Yeah, the new season of Ukraine vs. Russia came out,
and everybody's been following that.
I'm still waiting to see how this murder hornet thing ends.
That's the truth, right?
Wow, you're really tapping into the well on that one.
How embarrassing would that be,
is if everybody gets on board with like
whatever the big climate change and it's like we were wrong the icebergs were fine it was the
murder hornets the whole time they enjoy the slightly cooler yeah kyle and i've talked about
this murder hornets were a huge problem in the late 90s early 2000s i remember watching cnn
killer bees yeah killer bees they said and i i was so fucking scared of killer bees when I was like 9, 10,
because they showed the graphics of these Africanized bees flying over the ocean to get to the coast.
They're coming through the bathroom vents.
What defense do we have for that?
My bathroom has vents.
They made that movie Killer Bee Nightmare, and the news media didn't have anything to talk about.
It must have been like 1995 or something. So I don't think we'd bomb kosovo yet or like maybe clinton hadn't
like bill's getting his dick sucked in peace that hadn't happened that didn't come out yet that was
like 97 maybe like it was a dead year for the news and killer bees put a fear into me as a kid
oh yeah that was a cultural phenomenon at the time yeah Yeah. They were... Well, that's the murder hornet.
Jesus Christ.
They're still scary.
Look at that thing.
They're horrifying.
Look at that.
I'm looking at my own hand
and imagine a bug that goes across those three fingers.
I'd rather deal with a home invasion
than one of those.
What if they used a midget's hand?
What if that's a normal...
See, that's what I do with dick pics.
I hire a little person to hold my penis.
Forced perspective.
Forced perspective.
Pretend you're holding your penis, but put the penis much closer.
I bring Peter Jackson in on this.
Don't pull me into that.
Don't pull me into that.
I expertly navigated my way around it to make my dick joke,
and you're just trying to steer us right.
No,
thank you,
sir.
Optimistic.
Are you guys about the Lord of the Rings,
Amazon series?
Not at all.
Not since I,
not at all.
Since I read,
I've already written the letter that I'm going to send them.
I've already,
I've already said,
yeah,
I've pre-written my,
my letters about right now.
I,
I,
I was excited for it.
Cause I love Lord of the Rings,
but then like someone sent me an article and i was reading and it was like amazon didn't buy the rights to
the silmarillion and all of that stuff in there they only bought the rights to the lord of the
rings and so like they're just going to make up their own story within the world they bought the
characters and so that and so like yes that was a part of the deal it's very disappointing it all
has to be like an expansion of the lore and yeah i don't want that there's there's a million existing characters
in this one really the big characters are gonna be there we're gonna see dumbledorf we're gonna
see like the big scary monsters it's gonna be the lord of the rings that you hope to start small
no it's gonna be double sword thing i am sword thing. I guarantee watching it will bother me.
Because I'll be like, that person's not even a character.
Like, you couldn't have done something.
Taylor doesn't even bite on this shit anymore.
But Hutch did.
It's like with The Hobbit.
Remember The Hobbit?
When they added in Legolas and Legolas' girlfriend?
For no reason.
For no reason.
It didn't add anything to the story.
They were just like, oh, this is fun.
Let's have him jump on rocks as they're falling which is the most awful scene
i've ever seen in my life i hate or no no that that's edged out by the dwarves in the barrels
going down the river like singing as that was brutal i remember watching the hobbit movies
pissed me off i'm the guy who's the guy who um dude he used to date iran ka trump actually but
like uh he played venom in spider-man 3
What's his name? I haven't seen any despite. Oh, oh, yeah, is it that is it the guy from 70s show?
Is it toe for grace?
He said so he was in a movie called black Klansman, which is really good, but um he played David Duke like the
Grand Wizard or whatever the fuck is likely and
Duke, like the Grand Wizard or whatever the fuck his name was.
He said that playing that
role was really difficult for him
and one of the ways that he
sort of came down from playing that
role was he
went into an editing lab and
took the Hobbit films and condensed them into
one film. Yes. And I would
love to see that. That exists.
You can download that. Wait, I'm into a better movie? No, I read
about this. You can download that somewhere. Really? i saw links to it on some like 4chan board interesting
it puts a weird shit on my computer but but it was a great film somebody um somebody recently
combined prometheus and alien covenant into one movie and i actually like i love certain aspects
of both of those films but they're both like for me this is a planet though but i love
like the the engineer stuff all that shit was so cool and i i still gotta go back and watch that
but yeah so so those are different planets though so combining them while it does make like a cool
experience like it's not even like paying attention to the lore right no no it was it's time jumps
they do they do time jumps so they're not jumps. So they're not... Well, yeah.
So they're not insinuating that the craft that crashes
and Prometheus and falls over is the same one that they
get the face hugger in.
Okay, cool. That sounds fun. Braveheart
is another fan edit that's really good. You ever seen the
Braveheart edit that doesn't make you feel like shit?
No. Oh, do they stabilize the combat?
So they do not stabilize
the combat. It was the 90s and it's amazing.
Get over it.
The combat? version so they do not stabilize the combat it was the 90s and it's amazing get over it they um the combat it's shaky cam and you know shaky we're spoiled by like modern stuff when like you've got sword experts actually having a goddamn sword fight you know but um what they do
is the first scene of the movie is the william wallace torture scene and so we start on a low
and but it's it's not as low as you think because if it's
your first viewing you're like oh no they're killing mel gibson but then like as the movie
builds you get to see the love story and the triumphant battles and the revenge and all that
and like like how do they sew in like the fact that like that first scene is him being disemboweled
well you begin with that and then it's like you know four years later or something we
believe he gets better no four years before i think oh four years before you you knew that
no yes yes i know i'm okay my heart when i learned that brave heart wasn't like entirely true because
like when i saw it as a kid i was like this happened this is incredible and then like when
i was an adult i found out that's mostly bullshit i was like, this happened? This is incredible. And then when I was an adult, I found out, that's mostly bullshit.
I was like, fuck. I can't watch it anymore.
I don't like it when
our heroes get taken away from us
posthumously like that.
If it comes out that
he was some monster, it's a different story.
But I'm just talking about, it turned out that
Paul Bunyan actually wasn't that big.
It's like, dude, I've
kind of built my life around the
idea that paul bunyan that's how i've guided my life you're doing it now see hutch is doing it
to me that was paul bunyan a real guy no of course it wasn't but there's some poor fan out there
right now who was like i've been living my life by the paul bunyan code since 83 and now i find
out he didn't even exist. He was a fable.
I'm very gullible.
John Henry, he wasn't real.
He was a steel driving man.
And that was sad because he died
at the end.
That's a total loss
to the machine. Even as a kid I remember
reading it.
No, no, no, no, no, no. The machine
blew up first and then
john henry finished the work and then his heart exploded the heart exploded yes no the machine
takes a little tweak or a little more gas in it and it's it's boring holes decades after john
henry foolishly died because he didn't take a break the lack of medical science and john henry's
time it is not his fault okay and you can't judge him for that.
When was John Henry?
It's intuitive not to work himself to death.
Well, when was he if he'd been a real person, I would imagine.
When did they invent mining machines?
Sometime in the 1800s, you'd think, right?
Okay, probably around then.
Definitely like 1850, I'm going to call it.
Just stick it right in the middle.
I feel like, yeah, they got that cotton gin down,
and then they started firing out.
Oh, that had to be
like, when did Eli Whitney do that?
Because way before 1861
or so, I'd say. Yeah, probably like
early 1800s, maybe.
I think it was the 1800s. Yeah.
I like 19th century inventions. Can we do a show about
that? I like 19th century
medicine.
So here's what I'm thinking, right?
If women got depressed in the 1800s, they got heroin and vibrators, right?'m thinking right if women got depressed in the
1800s they got heroin and vibrators right what would happen if i got depressed what would they
do for me heroin and vibrators jack you off probably i don't know like that seemed to be
something doctors did back then it's just like oh you're taking care of nine kids by yourself
and you're feeling stressed i'm gonna finger blast you until you leave i'm gonna you're hysterical
i'm on board like fuck what do they do
now make you talk about your feelings you know how and that's never helped anyone so like so like
as men like going to the proctologist i'm guessing will be an awkward thing when that finally happens
and it's time for me to get like a prostate date exam but like you can opt in way before 40 i don't
i go every week um but like but like i don't i don't remember the
last time a doctor like messed with my junk at all i don't think i've ever done that as like an
adult man but um why did they do that to me so much as a child they don't as a child they check
you as a child because you're developing they would check me in a child in gym class they grab
my junk through my tidy whities and make sure that I didn't have hernias.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They had a hernia check me as a succulent nine-year-old constantly.
But now no one's interested in my hernias.
They didn't touch my dick when I went and got a physical recently.
I hadn't been to the doctor in years.
I was preparing for it mentally.
I was like, oh, fuck.
I don't know how I'm going to feel about this.
This is motivation.
I need you to eat right and exercise all year and see if the doctor treats
you better next time you're over physical i think instead of that like i think they can check for
the hernia really i know what he did with me is he like put his hand on like my abs and like lower
abs and had me cough and was like does any of this hurt because i think that's where maybe a hernia
would be like he's detecting it that way.
I think that's an equally effective and less invasive method than just grabbing my.
I don't know how hernias work.
It's your intestines like coming out of your like abdominal sleeve or something.
Right.
It sounds terrible.
Isn't it like a little tear in your.
And then the intestine comes through that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Sounds dreadful.
There's a lot of those little maladies that
sound awful that i've never had i've never had that i've never had a kidney stone or a uh like a
urinary tract infection or any of that shit oh i had a uti that when i was like seven
upon like some some like i was in i was like fucking around on the beach for a whole vacation
and there was so much like sand in my swim trunks i think it gave me a penis infection and i remember like being like seven eight nine whatever and like
sitting there at home like having to pee so goddamn bad and not wanting to go and having
to like heighten myself up like okay it's time to pee it's time to be i did what i did they they
got we got like a little plastic container and filled it with warm water.
And I sat in that and I peed in that.
Yeah.
UTIs are awful.
Did you guys see the green mile?
It's kind of like that.
It's awful.
Did you piss blood, Taylor?
No.
It just stung and hurt.
I've only had blood come out of my dick once,
and it was like maybe a week after I discovered how to masturbate. It just went too hard in the paint. Oh shit. Uh, but I've never had, um, that was, that was like 2012 I think that was hemorrhoids. You've never had one of
those. We talked about these horrible hemorrhoid issue when you know, thank God no, no hemorrhoids
or anything. And I worry about that when I squat and stuff. I'm like, you know, that mind muscle
connection. Like I'm always thinking about my butthole i'm like don't blow out back there
little aren't that bad yeah but but i had this like spots woody had like a severe one he had
a big hemorrhoidectomy they cored him like an apple yeah i was 26 it was a long time ago but
it was it's called a complete hemorrhoidectomy it's one of the most painful recoveries in all
of medicine and i didn't like it can i just say i appreciate that you always
you always say that because it's important that it be fucking said important that it be fucking
said yeah it is one of the most yeah what you'll have to imagine here because woody is too much of
a gentleman to to acknowledge it but he had to poop out of there for several weeks as as you do
as a as a living being.
Like broken glass.
And there's no way.
I'm just imagining.
I wish they'd put some kind of a split in your asshole.
Like a valve.
Because I'm just imagining taking a hard shit across a cored out asshole.
And it just.
Because I imagine. It would have to be it just... You know in Apple Core,
how you just jab it in, twist twice, and it pulls
the core out? That's how I picture your surgery.
Yeah, you're not far off.
And it was
absolutely terrible.
Removing the bandage was terrible.
It was
just... It took me
probably an hour
in a hot bathtub
removing the bandage, but you gotta go.
It was an absolutely dreadful experience.
I didn't like it, and 0 out of 10
would not do it again.
Do you think things like that make you
mentally tougher?
Do you think that
maybe not that particular instance because it sounds
so horrific, but do you think whenever things are tough for you maybe it's tough like man i can't
get this caps lifted or maybe it's tough like today was a bad day now even if you go to prison
they can't do anything to your ass that you're not ready for yeah you're you're like oh what are
you raping me like i'm gonna do shit to your ass you You can't even imagine. Bring it on. Yeah. Bring it on.
Do you ever think like I got through that? I'll be okay.
Yeah. There's a couple that I'm proud of.
As far as there's a long duration when I went to school at night.
So for like 12 years I had to be disciplined and I had to have good time management and that impacted me in the longterm.
A really short one when I had those two reserve throws,
there was a little piece of me that wanted help.
You know, like, this is going wrong.
I'm headed towards my death.
I'm plummeting from the sky.
And is there anyone?
No.
This is a 100% you issue, Woody.
You're here by yourself. Fucking work the problem.
There's no time for anything else.
And those are some of the moments that like shaped me a little bit.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I didn't get that.
I don't have any experience with a large hemorrhoid,
but I get that when I look back on like deep depressive episodes and getting through that and recognizing the resilience that it takes to go from, you know, literally praying for death to, oh, shit, you know, like I like life and I want to live.
Like when you go through those experiences and then you come out the other side, that, that, that reinforces idea like,
well,
maybe I am a little bit resilient.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We're good at that.
Like our bodies and our minds are very resilient things,
especially the human body.
When you see like,
I don't know,
some of the injuries people come back to.
I always,
the worst thing I've ever seen someone like semi recover from,
you know,
the guy who got the bear,
like tear his face off.
Like there's a picture of him and his face looks like a curtain of flesh like oh i've seen that yeah that's horrible and then
and then he recovers to look like a person who wouldn't frighten children let's just leave it
that like that's right that's how good they got it you know one of his eyes is still all good
you know like like he came out looking like oh that guy had a rough day one time, but not like... Not like the chimp woman.
The chimp woman.
Oh, not like the chimp woman.
Oh, that guy was day one of plastics.
He did a terrible job putting her back together.
Yeah, I kill myself if a chimp gets a hold of me.
But then I found out with that chimp story that she was like, I think she was giving the monkey opiate pills and getting it drunk.
Dude, she was fucking that monkey for sure, right?
That's a weird thing to do.
Maybe she was, but the monkey
didn't care for it, I guess, and ripped her face off.
No, I think she'd been fucking the one girl, and then
the other girl came over and the monkey got jelly.
It could be.
Monkeys do get jealous. They do.
Jelly.
Coco used to get jealous of people's attention.
Coco the talking gorilla. Except don't
look too far into that, because then you find out it was mostly made up.
And there was not a gorilla.
You're doing it now.
Taylor is one of those people who kills our heroes.
God damn.
I was just talking about people going after Paul Bunyan and shit.
Here he is.
He took Helen Keller from me.
My inspiration.
And now here he is.
Here he is taking out Coco the monkey.
Okay.
You need to bring in Twitter's team to clamp down on PKA misinformation.
Taylor information.
No, Coco's real.
Mute him, Zach.
Mute him.
I don't know.
Is Coco not real?
Don't mute him.
Don't mute him.
He's going to do it for a second.
Yeah, yeah.
I knew he would.
Was Coco really not real? That fucking monkey didn't know sign language? Because I've seen the to do it for a second Yeah, I knew he would Was Coco really not real?
That fucking monkey didn't know sign language
Because I've seen the monkey do it
Yeah, I thought it was much realer than it was
Have you seen the documentary
About where they take the monkey back to the Congo?
You're muted
Wait, he shouldn't be muted
He was for a moment
No, I haven't seen Is that the Jane Goodall or whatever? He shouldn't be muted. He was for a moment. No, I haven't seen.
Is that the Jane Goodall one?
No, no, no.
This is based on a Michael Crichton novel, I believe.
It's called Congo.
Oh, it's a movie.
I thought you were talking about a documentary.
Oh, it's a documentary, yeah.
Oh, okay.
No, I haven't seen it.
There's a monkey named Amy, I think,
and she's got this sort of gauntlet she wears.
It's got like a pad on it and stuff,
and it interprets
her sign language and the verbal commands with like a girl's voice because she's you know amy
and she'd be like oh amy good gorilla amy good gorilla and you know yeah it's pretty cool and
she kept painting these paintings of um like like these temples that i guess exist in the jungle in
the congo and that's how they knew she wanted to go home. She was having memories of her childhood
because she was from the Congo region.
And she'd been, I think they were at Berkeley.
I think that's where they're doing all this stuff.
It was fascinating.
The movie's terrible, but the book is incredible.
I agree.
All those old Michael Crichton books,
the Andromeda, Strange, Sphere.
Sphere is great.
Congo.
He was so good, dude.
I got to say that movie is a guilty pleasure for me
because growing up,
unless your parents were into film, I guess,
there was just a handful of VHSs or DVDs
that occasionally got bought sporadically.
But we had Congo, God damn it, on VHS.
And I love that shit.
My sister always loved it.
There's a scene where the guy with his African accent is like,
stop eating my sesame cake.
And we would just say that.
And everybody would crack up laughing my whole childhood.
And they bit out a fucking space laser and killed a bunch of monkeys there at the end.
And that's just cool.
What did you guys think about doing the movie?
I loved it.
I loved it so liked it i loved it
so so much get my attention i thought it was i'm a big fan of like look i like the original the
cheesy one that that everybody shits on um i like that i like anything with a lot of like deep lore
that that like hey are you gonna watch that movie, you should read these. I like shit like that.
I'm into Warhammer 40K right now.
The original was bad.
It's a bad movie, but it's a great story.
I'll say that.
I think.
I love this new one.
I think the casting was so on the money.
I think that the special effects are finally there
to show a sandworm, to show,
I can't remember the name of their ships,
those big ships that they move intergalactically with, but like um they have a special name like like to actually show that on
screen it can be done now and i even like the kid they've got playing paul atreides uh his name
always gets away from me too much showing on the screen like i didn't want to watch some college
kids cgi project as they like put together this spaceship in this room and this this and this
that and i forget which guest it was i think it might have been matt farah who said like what
they're doing is they're teaching you about the universe when they show you this magnificent room
they're trying to imply like the power that this family has when they show you this this uh whatever
giant sand car thing you know they're trying to give you a scale in a sense of like what this environment is like like i get it i that makes sense when i saw it i just viewed it
through the lens of they're showing me pretty pictures that i don't give a fuck about but
there was a lot of pretty pictures that i don't give a fuck i watched with childlike
i watched with childlike wonder same me too every every time a thing came on the screen i i i i i was
like i'm not going to be a jaded like adult here we're watching dune tonight and okay i was like
spaceship is big it really was and i'm familiar with the the books at all did you read any of
the books i've i haven't read the books because I know how they end.
Yeah, you don't want to.
The Internet's shitty with spoilers, man.
You wouldn't think that a book series that's probably 180,000 words can be spoiled.
But for me, it kind of happened that way a little bit.
And also, it'd be quite the undertaking. And I've got the Stormlight Archive piled up on my end table that I occasionally pick up and look at and then like hey there's a bunch of other stuff that i'm supposed to read
and i i do like audiobooks though so it's the warhammer 40k has so many audiobooks that i get
i get into those because the stories don't even have to connect they're just a moment in that big
universe in time somewhere and and you can really enjoy those.
Are you finally reading Stormlight Archive?
No, I was kidding.
Damn it.
Just wanted to see your eyes light up.
I was excited.
I'm plowing through the Dune books right now.
I'm on the fourth one.
Oh, shit.
All audio books, too.
That's the way to do it.
Yeah, you can do other shit while you're doing it. But if you like the first film,
it is going to pop the fuck off in the second film.
Yeah.
It's like even just so much crazier
than you could possibly imagine by the time the fourth book comes.
Like people are turning into worms.
It's like that level of crazy.
But I love it personally.
I mean, I would recommend reading it.
If you like sci-fi,
I'm having a great time with it.
I believe you.
I think it might be the better story.
Have you ever gotten into Warhammer 40k?
No, but hell of people
have told me to get into it.
What are you reading
from it?
I don't even know.
What I'm doing right now is I'm going through this new? I don't even know. Nothing right now.
What I'm doing right now is I'm going through this new YouTuber I found's entire catalog because it's like an audio book with a biography mixed in, sort of,
because he'll quote from a book or a source material,
and then he'll speak with his own words and explain for 45 minutes,
sometimes a really complicated piece of that history.
It is fascinating.
The cool thing about it is
I'm not going to go too deep
into it, but their god is an atheist.
How does that work?
The emperor of mankind is
a god. There's no
question of it. His thing was
no religions.
One of his sons,
and keep in mind, his sons are like demigods, they were reclaiming the universe now that he's in control. And his son is like, yeah, dad's a God. I've met him. He's a God. So when he goes
to a planet, he's like, hey, I know you haven't known humanity for a long time. We're your
ancestors. We've come to reclaim your planet, bring you back into the fold. By the way, my dad's a god. You will worship him or burn.
And so the emperor noticed that one of his sons wasn't reclaiming worlds at the same rate as the
others because he sent out 20 sons or whatever. And he's like, hey, why are you so slow about
getting these worlds together? And he's like, oh, well, when we go to a world, we tell them to
worship you like a god or we burn them. And it takes a little longer. And he's like, oh, well, when we go to a world, we tell them to worship you like a god,
or we burn them, and it takes a little longer.
And he goes, you know that I forbid that.
And he destroys all of those planets
and everyone on them,
because he will not be worshipped as a god.
Because he is righteous.
That sounds fucking cool.
There's so much cool lore.
If you like something where they're like,
they go on and on about just how powerful or amazing or incredible this thing is for an hour.
And then at the end of it, they go, and he was but 1000, the power of the emperor.
You're like, what?
He went on for an hour about how strong this guy was.
Like, that's how everything is in that universe.
It's fun.
for an hour about how strong this guy was like that's how everything is in that universe it's it's it's fun and uh i found a youtuber who's got a voice like a uh like an audible like a book uh
narrator so it's fun i don't know it's a bunch of nerdy shit though no that kind of stuff is fun
get those audio books i i i think you'll dig them i like i did that people warned me how crazy they
got and i was a little um trepidatious is that the word i was a little like yeah yeah but but once i started devouring the books i was like this is cool
i really i really like the the story and um i'm very curious to see how the neville nuve um
translates it in the in the sequel because everyone likes the chosen one story you know you you like
that this one is so subversive, though. This one is like so...
It plays on that trope
of the savior kind of situation
and then it just flips it
right on its head
in some really interesting ways.
Okay.
I wasn't aware of that.
Okay.
I might actually get into it.
I'm due for a rereading
of 11-22-63.
I haven't read that since jail.
But I like Stephen King a lot. I read a bunch
of that when I was locked up.
Do Stormlight Archive next. You'll like it.
You love that kind of world building.
Woody already gave up on it.
You gave up on it!
No, I didn't. I'm just taking a break.
I got one more book to do
and I love it. Hutch, if you
like sci-fi, this is
not sci-fi, more more fantasy have you heard of
stormlight archive that book series it's really really good it's uh who is it by what the fuck
is that guy's name brandon sanderson it's like it's the most in-depth what he does is he builds
a wonderful world the way like jr r tolkien did with lord of the rings except something that
tolkien did and i still love those books because the world is so good,
is he would focus on minutiae that didn't need to be discussed
because he was autistic about Middle Earth,
and he would breeze past a battle
because he wanted to talk about the artwork
from the dwarves that was done, or whatever the hell.
This is like that, except he focuses in on the combat,
on the powers, and one of his like quotes in his interviews is like
you know how do you keep characters so interesting he's like i just always remind myself that
drawbacks and weaknesses are much more interesting than powers and abilities and so i make sure to
balance that in a way where nobody's op or anything and it's just he he i'm talking about
stormlight archive i know woody will disagree but i think that he spends a ton of time in all the right areas. The battles
are awesome and intense. The explanation
of the battles is awesome and intense. It's not
so-and-so stabbed so-and-so. It's
a huge, drawn-out epic.
He's such a wonderful writer.
Woody, I'm waiting for you to... Such a wonderful
writer. How many years have we waited for the
next book?
Brandon Sanderson? Not long at all.
Oh, maybe I'm mistaken then.
All right.
I'm mixing him up with a different author.
With George R.R. Martin.
No, not George.
This guy is such a good, prolific author, Brandon Sanderson.
On his website, he has every week updates on what he's spending his time writing and a new percentage of what is done.
So he'll say, I'm 71% through with this.
I got three chapters done this week.
I need to wrap up the last 19 chapters.
I've got most of the storyline out,
but it's not complete.
And he'll,
all the time updates like that,
which is like,
that's awesome.
Like,
I just really liked the guy.
I think.
All right.
That,
that does sound pretty interesting.
I don't know.
It,
they are,
those books are so thick,
man.
Like,
like every time I've got them in my cupboard with the rest of my books,
I don't have enough books to really have them anywhere.
But when I go to that shelf, I'm like,
ooh.
Because I've got them stacked
in their own stack, and they're so thick.
If you ever want them back, I'll send them back
to you. No, read them.
I may. Those are a gift.
Oh, hell, thank you.
Now I've got to send you something.
Do you guys fuck with No Man's Sky?
Have you heard of this game?
I've heard of it.
I thought it got universally panned.
That was years ago.
I don't know anything about it.
Tell the story.
It launched in 2016, and they overpromised when they hyped up the game,
and the launch was real bad.
The game was not optimized very well, and it just it was it was a mess and everybody panned it i mean but it it's had one
of the coolest redemption arcs of like any game because they've just been consistently updating it
patiently over the last six years and now it's like if you like minecraft and you like sci-fi
i i i can't recommend it enough.
Especially if you get high.
Like, if you smoke a little bit of weed,
I'm playing a permadeath mode right now.
So it's like, if you die, you die.
And I'm like 25 hours in, and it's got a storyline,
and it does a pretty good job of, like, you know,
holding your hand and, like, telling you where.
It's crazy that they kept developing that game.
That game flopped, right?
That game was panned. Everyone hated it. And they're like and they're like no no we're gonna keep working on it like
no one does that no one keeps investing into a shit game everyone hated i can't think of another
example of a game that came out sucked and they're like i'm gonna keep working this problem until it
gets good but they did really good if you're if you're a fan of sci-fi and you're like that kind of nerdy shit and if you like it hi oh my god it's it's i'm so is it like uh is it like skyrim
no in that like are there a lot of missions uh it's just like you're fucking around you have a
main quest and i'm on the main quest right now and it's like you spawn on this planet and it's
a different planet each time and there's like quantrillion planets in the game or whatever.
And you don't have any memory of who you are or how you got there.
And then you just sort of start, like, putting these clues together.
And at first, you've got to gather sodium to, like, fix your suit.
And then you've got to find your ship.
And then you've got to find parts to get your ship working again.
And then you get into space, and you go to a space station.
And then you got to find parts to get your ship working again. And then you get into space and you go to a space station.
And so like you can,
you can do the story or you can just,
you know,
do Minecraft stuff and just like build bases on different planets or
whatever.
But it,
it is thoroughly satisfying as an experience.
Okay.
Yeah.
I would check it out.
Is it a,
is it like offline or is everybody in there together?
You can do offline or you can do online.
It's up to you.
But like the odds of you like running into people
are quite small.
Like the only thing,
because there's literally like 16 quad trillion planets.
It's just this massive, massive, massive world.
And is there enough to do?
Like some games like that, I lose interest,
but I guess, does it tell you how to do stuff?
Like go here to get the sodium it's not
just like good luck yeah no like you you go into your spaceship and you scan planets and if you
scan a planet it'll tell you like which um resources are abundant on that planet and so you
know you might need to craft a cadmium drive so you can beam yourself to a system that's super
far away because you need to go talk to this like powerful ai that people think is a god because they have information about this thing
but in order to craft this cadmium drive you need this resource you need this you need to learn the
recipe and so so it like it does a really good job of giving you shit to do like i'm not like
minecraft like i don't have fun just like i'm gonna build a house or whatever like i need like
a story and um yeah so yeah yeah it does a good job whatever. Like I need like a story. And, um, yeah. So yeah,
yeah.
It does a good job of,
uh,
pushing you towards like learning the game.
I'm glad you brought that up because I've been like a jump back into Skyrim like less
than a week ago.
I hadn't played in like 10 years and I like already it was a huge mistake because I'm
like in my,
like when I'm supposed to be working on other stuff,
I'm like,
you know,
I could probably get my stealth up.
I could get my sneak hire tonight after this I'm gonna
have to you know I could go do this or oh I
can't wait to go join the thieves guild and like
I do like doing shit like that
and I was gonna ask you like what
you would recommend for something like that
and I guess maybe No Man's Sky give that a go
I've done that yeah Red Dead
2 is a ton of fun I like Skyrim more
because I like the fantasy and the magic more than
the Wild West kind of aesthetic,
but they're both great. I wish they would fucking come
out with a new Skyrim after
when did it come out? 2011?
It came out in 2011,
yep, and at the end of 2011
and they
teased the next Elder Scrolls like
two years ago. I don't know why they did it. They just did
like a quick shot of like
that world and that was it. They just did like a quick shot of like that world
and that was it.
It was just like misty, mist coming out of the mountains
and like beautiful music playing.
But that motherfucking game is not gonna come out
until like 2025, so I don't know why they did that.
But we have Starfield coming out later this year.
Which is like an RPG in space from Bethesda.
So hopefully that's good enough to tide us over
in the meantime, but it's easy to lose, easy easy to lose 12 hours playing Skyrim in a day oh
yeah and you started a new game on switch like it last year just just to
fuck around with it and then hundred hours went by I'm like oh god I got so
much shit to do what am I doing yeah but no no no man's sky I would I would
highly highly recommend jumping into that world. It's very relaxing and satisfying.
I'll check that one out then.
And I'll check the Starfield out too.
I didn't...
If it's the same people who did Skyrim...
Yeah, it doesn't come out until the end of the year though.
The number one people also ask,
Will Starfield be like Skyrim?
Please tell me yes!
I'm waiting on Darktide.
I want that game really bad i love vermin
tide and uh dark tide has been delayed for an entire year now um but it's supposed to come out
in september and i'm very excited it's another it's it's based in that 40k universe it's a four
player co-op um you make your way through a level hordes and hordes of varied enemies. It's a lot like Left 4 Dead, but infinitely better with class-based.
There's a tank character, and there'll be a fast little ninja character,
and everybody has to really work together.
You need that tank, and you need that ninja to get through the hardest of levels.
It's hundreds and hundreds of levels.
I don't know if I like the class-based stuff.
Because I want to be the elf. I don't know if I like the class-based stuff. You know?
Because I want to be the elf.
Because everyone wants to be the elf. The elf is clearly
the most fun. The elf wins
the stats at the end of every fucking round.
She's slayed the most. Whatever she wants
to fucking do the most, she does. Do you want to
be a monster-focused build? Then you've done
the most DPM and the fucking big guy
when he came around. Do you want to kill every fucking weak ass mouse that you run into then the elf can do that everyone
else is a piece of shit except for the elf who just rocks the house in this game do you want to
be fucking invisible go behind the next guy and stealth play the elf does that too elf does
fucking everything but no you play jackass with a giant sword that swings so goddamn slow
you'll never meet a bad guy they get vermin tied vermin tied like it's such a fun play left for
dead it's just a skin right you can be the chick you can be the black guy you can be the old guy or
the other guy um the motorcycle guy i guess but it doesn't really matter. You all move the same speed.
You all have the same hitbox.
Everything is the same.
But with Verbal Tide, one person gets the good character.
Everybody else can go suck that character's dick.
And class-based, is it good?
I don't think it's quite that extreme of a skill difference.
Because the elf character needs the tank character out front.
It depends which elf build you use.
When people go to solo that game,
they use the elf or possibly the dwarf because there are these combos that can
get them to run extra fast,
but it's basically the elf.
You know,
no one solos that game with fucking Balrog or whatever the goddamn mace guy's name is. No one
solos that game with anything but the elf or
possibly the dwarf. And when they do dwarf,
they just run. I get your point.
I'll say this. I don't know if I agree with all that,
but elf is really fun to play, which is why
I... Kyle always got elf.
That's what Kyle claimed.
The reason why Kyle always got elf is because Kyle
spent hours every day.
So he had a level 50 elf. And it was hours every day. So he had a level 50 elf.
And it was like, well, I've got a level 50 elf.
And everybody else was like, well, I've got a level 3 elf.
I'm like, well, I kind of want to play my level 50, you know?
Did it go up to 50 or stop at 30?
Whatever the highest was I have.
Yeah.
In any case, yeah, I think I had a level 30 fucking witch hunter or something like that.
And I never wanted to be him.
You figure out what the elf of the new game is,
and that's you, buddy.
I think your producer's prodding you there.
Yeah, we're like 24 minutes late.
That's okay.
I think we artificially
set that time when we do the ads, by the way.
I guess I wasn't paying much attention.
Having too much fun talking.
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played because we're talking about games have you guys played fucking god of war 2018 i've never played a god of war game oh my god i didn't have a playstation i don't
i didn't love um you can play it on pc now by the way but uh i didn't love the genre of like
action adventure kind of games so like the original god of war trilogy on the like old
playstations never really appealed to me and that's why i didn't play 2018 because i thought it was going to be more of that and uh my chat kept on bugging me to play
this game for like years bugging me to play this game and so finally i was like all right i'll give
it a shot and it ended up being probably like my my favorite is red dead 2 and this is this is
probably number number two like i was expecting the original god of war stuff
yeah and it ended up being kind of more like uh last of us which is just so not what i expected
um but yeah if if anybody while listening to this episode hasn't played it because they were
assuming it was going to be like the older games dude hop in it's on pc now check that game out it
is incredible it is just such an
incredibly narrow incredibly good narrative story and then the gameplay
and in the the RPG aspect of it like how you progress and like the pace at which
you level up and unlock new abilities is just I mean it is a mind-blowingly good
good game so the last thing I played was Tarkov I put a good bit of time into
this most recent white but I haven't played anything since then really so i might pick
something up like that uh i think i'm getting a console too i've thought about getting a playstation
5 just to i don't know sit down and be now the new consoles now are just incredibly beefy yeah
yeah i might actually do that but but uh what i really want to do is go back and play bioshock
or something like that again with like next-gen graphics,
like these games that they keep remastering.
I think they're doing it to Dead Space as well.
I like that stuff.
They just announced 2K, or Take-Two,
just announced that within the next two years,
we're going to get Bioshock 4 and GTA 6.
So that was a big announcement that happened today.
So I'm very excited.
I mean, I know it's not Ken Levine's original team
because he's the guy that did Bioshock 1 and Infinite.
So it's a new team working on the fourth one.
But I just love that universe so much.
So as long as it's put in the hands of capable devs
and capable storytellers,
then I have faith it can be a really...
Yeah, we were just saying earlier in this week,
like I really wish they'd make an Amazon
miniseries out of
the building of...
What was the city under the water called?
Rapture.
I'd like to see
from the beginning of Rapture
and then to its height.
They're making a prequel series
on Netflix. Oh, shit.
Really? Yeah.
Did it get announced since Tuesday when I said I wanted it? They're making a prequel series on Netflix. Oh, shit. Really? Yeah. Yeah.
Did it get announced since Tuesday when I said I wanted it?
I like the Tuesday.
I believe that's cause and effect.
Yeah.
It got announced like four or five months ago.
There was originally a movie in development hell for like 10 years,
and it just never got made.
And it was supposed to be Gore Verbinski was going to direct it.
And I heard the script was horrible from somebody who had read the script
but so thankfully it didn't get negative if it was horrible but yeah they announced a netflix
prequel series and actually it might be a movie um uh you know who's making it now i don't know
but it's in it's in the uh yeah yeah it's in the thing it's yeah it's not a series it's a it's a
prequel film about about like the origins of andrew ryan and sounds like yeah yeah i at this point like like i don't know if you're
gonna tell like a long story or something like that i always want a series over a movie um same
yeah like something like this halo series i i haven't caught up on it i'm only two episodes
in but so but what i've seen i've liked i know a lot of people had a meltdown because master
chief took his helmet off but i haven't given a shit about what they do to master chief since they made halo that anything after halo 3 really
i don't know i like that self-contained trilogy of the first three games and i haven't touched
halo since then so i don't even know what they thought it was a fun it was a fun game the single
player was fun it was like the first time they did um open world stuff so it was it was kind of
more like the fire cry kind of kind of a of uh far cry gets a little
repetitive though um this is thankfully a little bit better than that but yeah if you haven't played
the new one infinite is good i have not no i haven't played since halo 3 um like i said i
really like the storyline i i don't know i i always thought that would make a really good movie
um just but but i like that they've made the tv show it's like nice they've made something but
i don't know i want i want to see like the story of the halo 1 2 and 3 like that they've made the TV show. It's nice that they've made something, but I don't know. I want to see the story
of the Halo 1, 2, and 3.
That story of getting the Halo rings
and the Arbiter and all that
stuff. Gears 2. I remember
12 years ago
them talking about...
Maybe they were just making a joke on the internet about how they would
cast a Gears of War movie.
Batista, right?
Maybe Batista would look really good at it.
But I remember back then they had
John Travolta as Marcus Phoenix.
What?
Batista has come out and said
he really wants to play him.
Yeah. He's got a big
fucking melon and that's what you need to play that role.
He said he wants to play Bane too.
Which would be...
I think he's actually pretty fucking decent as an actor.
I do, too.
What's his name as well from Peacekeeper?
John Cena, yeah.
Big fan of John Cena.
That guy can act as well.
That show kind of blew me away.
I was so surprised.
I wasn't really like...
I was like, oh, whatever, you know?
But it ended up being surprisingly heartfelt at times.
I only watched it because Kyle sold it sold it and it was really good i actually
liked how dirty it was like i don't know i guess i pictured john cena is squeaky clean and i think
of dc is generally pretty clean too and uh you know by the second episode he's picking up some
chick in a bar and fucking her doggy style over the bathroom sink and you know i was like oh not
squeaky clean yeah
yeah that scene where he's in his like whitey tighties and he's singing that choir boys song
into a vibrator into a hitachi wand yeah yeah yeah like um that's that's an amazing thing i've
shown that show to so many people and every one of them has gone on to be like yeah everybody
everybody my work watches it now like anytime somebody gets exposed to it they generally they generally react positively because it's just fun
hbo max i think of all the streaming services has the best original content and they just crush it
like every time something about this something about this project in particular because on the
surface i like if i just heard what it was i I'd be like, oh, okay, so one of the main characters in the superhero show
is an obese black lady. Why?
Oh, okay, so she's the daughter of that. Okay. But that character
who's a lesbian, obese
person of color stuck right in the middle of this thing, I think on the surface I might have looked at that
like, ah, they're being real woke here here okay this this is going to be just like that watchman
series they made but i watched it and she became one of my she became one of my oh that was trash
but i just want to say she became one of my she became one of my favorite characters in the show
i i liked her a lot she became like she's funny she's like a great actress and uh and i dug it a lot and they didn't have a moment
where like she used her like angry black woman strength to win the day because i feel like that's
a trope that that they were subjected to now that like angry black women are extra strong or
something um but like i know that like loki superhero movies so i haven't been hit with that
i don't know well it turns out that that loki the god of mischief his kryptonite angry black woman can't deal with it well he should he should be
a person or whatever they have to be overweight though he should be impossible to trick loki
isn't he the trickster he is the god of tricksters mischief he'd be impossible to out mischief no
she puts this like slave collar on him and like kicks him kicks him in the ass
and like you know down the hallway and stuff and generally beats up on him with like a club
loki is great does she have powers no but she's got that collar oh is it loki loki is great they
and that's how they introduced the multiverse into the mcu like i think that in one division
yeah i love loki i like it a lot i'm'm mostly teasing about that. But no, I couldn't get down with The Watchmen show.
And I really like...
What?
You didn't like Jeremy Irons as Adrian Veidt?
I didn't like that they took Jeremy Irons as Adrian Veidt
slash Adam Mandius or whatever.
Like the smartest man who's ever existed,
but he's been fooled and he's been stuck on
this planet they use him like like he's the he is the old white man he's the
he'd been there for 30 years like a bitch like like getting but he chose
that and the whole point was like he got bored of his own create I don't want to
spoil it for people that's fair but but he did they didn't trick him to be on
that and like that this you know when they brought him back like even he was I don't want to spoil it for people. That's fair. But they didn't trick him to be on that. And like the soundtrack.
You know, when they brought him back, like even he was tricked, right?
She froze him into that statue thing.
That wasn't a trick.
That was a, they were, I feel like you need to rewatch it because I don't think he got you fact straight, Kyle.
I might, but it seems to me that like he went through that overly complicated mode of getting off that like moon or whatever.
He did that to preserve his body.
It was like the carbonite.
They didn't trick him. That was just to keep his body intact as he made the trip back from
Titan or whatever. But the only way that he could signal that he wanted to come back was with all those
bodies and that really complicated thing to send the SOS. But then she wasn't going to
come pick him up because of that. She doesn't care about him.
She went to get him to frame him up because of that because you know she treats she doesn't care about him she she went to get him to like frame him up for the the whole global like evil she was doing right no that's
how i remember it no go read this oh there was a lot of rap music it was hard to pay attention
no uh fucking uh what's his name uh trent resner and uh atticus ross did the soundtrack to that one
and it was a fantastic soundtrack too i. I'm teasing about the soundtrack.
I told you I was gullible. I fucking told you.
I don't remember it that way.
I just remember him being like,
she froze him into that statue thing.
He didn't want that, did he? He didn't want to be
frozen into carbonite. They were transporting him.
Yeah, but he thought they were going to thaw him
out when they got there, and he was going to be in charge.
Instead, she's like, right at the last minute, she thaws
him out, and he's able to foil her plans right no kyle he's right now that
he's saying this the show makes more sense because because thank you i appreciate that
i've never seen it i thought it was great it was jay damon lindelof he's he's written a bunch of
stuff that i really did he did the leftovers which is like one of my favorite shows of all time
weren't the villains weren't the villains like the clan they were kind of like
yeah like a neo version of the clan yeah and they they they idolized uh Rorschach who in the book
or in the graphic novel Rorschach is not supposed to be like a hero he's like a full-on fascist but
in the movie in the Zack Snyder movie he ended up being kind of like kind of like a hero like one
of the sympathetic characters but uh but the show is a little bit more faithful i think to the source material um but yeah uh i don't know it's
just that i i felt like it was it was too woke for me i think maybe i'm just overly sensitive to that
but i couldn't i couldn't enjoy it because then i watched it all though i thought special effects
were great i don't have the the woke allergy i guess like you'll get there i like the way you
phrase that because i'm kind of
with you like i'm usually the guy that defends that one freaking scene in end game where all
the girls are together it was 15 seconds i fucking hate that scene personally look i didn't let that
scene ruin my movie she didn't need their help like they show up and they're like oh she's not
alone like we can do like we'll help her and you know you got all these like the woman characters like fighting and then
captain marvel just does her superman charge and just plows through all the uh all of thanos's
henchmen like she could have flown over the top of them she could have burrowed under the
through the earth to where she wanted to go like the spirit of that scene was good i. I mean, like, if you take a little girl to go see that movie,
I'm sure that would have meant something.
Why would I do that?
That scene wasn't for me.
But I realized that I wasn't the intended audience for it.
Some people, like, flipped out about that scene.
And I'm like, meh.
Whatever.
It's fine.
It's just one scene.
I'm not going to get all bent out of shape over it.
I don't get bent out of shape on it.
But I was just like, oh, they did a thing there instead of like this was not the
most direct route to like complete the narrative in the perfect way they they went around they
made a little detour here to please a group oh they kind of did that with the introduction of
all the people coming back from the snap you know they kind of did that and we needed them
we needed them but we didn't need them all to line up and hit superhero poses like they didn't go straight into battle or anything.
It was just fan service.
I love that.
I love that.
Pure fan service.
But I was sure it was fans fan service.
Really well done.
But I agree.
And I loved it.
But so maybe if I was the audience that saw the girls all line up and I think, yeah, that's cool, too.
Gwyneth Paltrow.
Let's just if you remove Gwyneth Paltrow, I'm fine with the rest.
How about that? Gwyneth Paltrow i'm fine with the rest how about that when it paltrow kill like 13 of all the major villains
you killed two out of like nine of the villains in in the whole marvel universe because she killed
the guy in iron this is going we may be going into nerdy territory that maybe so but i'm said
people are acting like uh like iron man's wife doesn't to hold doesn't belong there when in reality she's pepper pot she's killed more people than thor maybe i'll allow it probably probably not
though thor seems pretty bloodthirsty he's my favorite and no one else i think love and thunder
looks incredible the trailer for that looked incredible i'm a big taiko atiti fan too so i
mean i think ragnarok is in like my
top five mcu films i didn't even know i like that director and i still can't pronounce his name
until ragnarok and then i'm like oh he saved it i see how he turned it around i see how he turned
thor from one of those meh kind of serious to perhaps the premiere one my friends from new
zealand hate him wait what really yeah yeah i think he's i think a lot of like depending on which side
you're on uh might love him or hate him because i think there's some sort of like maori independence
thing there or whatever like whatever that uh you know the group of people there that are on the
the island there um and uh taiki what tiki or whatever is like you know he's one of them and
so i think he puts like a lot of little like
hints in his movies and stuff to like and uh like i think he like painted some ship the colors of
like the maori independence league of justice or whatever they're called and like in america that
doesn't mean shit to me i don't give a fuck maybe it's their version of flying a confederate flag i
don't know but uh some people in new zealand my kiwi friends seem to act like it is but i don't give
a shit i did like that movie a lot like if you like the ragnarok what do you check out some of
his older movies um eagle versus shark is really good hunt for the wilder people jojo rabbit was
more recent that was like jojo rabbit's wild he plays terrible titles i know nothing but i mean
if you say they're good i'll try jojo rabbit the taiki whatever the fuck plays hitler
he plays he plays adolf hitler and and it's very funny it's uh it's good because it's like i i
really like it when movies blend absurdity and humor with like genuinely hard did you like the
death of stalin uh i thought that was a little boring personally i mean about like maybe i'm
not smart enough to appreciate it i'm sure you're plenty smart enough to appreciate it but but i think that it is boring
you just have to really enjoy like maybe those particular actors like i'm a big steve buscemi fan
and uh and just watching him do his thing i can just sit there and be like yeah keep acting i
like it even if the source material is kind of weak with movies like i would go back and watch
the same movie like five times because uh it's my
experience that sometimes when you watch a movie uh your experience with it is going to be totally
different on one day than it is another day so maybe i might have been in a bad mood that day
or i might have been distracted with something else so it's an absurdist it's an absurdist take
on you know the day stalin died and all of the the key key holders are trying to figure out what...
I'm telling the audience
and everybody. He dies
and is laying in a puddle of his own piss
and everybody's afraid to help him
because that would mean intruding
on Stalin.
Making him look weak or whatever.
They're like,
I'm sure he'll hop up any minute.
It's almost like that Monty python scheme he is a deceased dictator like yeah like nobody wants
to admit it it's a it's a fun little movie though well i got the boys i gotta get going here pretty
soon because i gotta make food for my uh for me and my my girl but um thanks for hanging out
i didn't think i would stay this long and i
had a good time having a conversation with you guys yeah yeah it was good catching up with you
man i'm gonna i'm gonna send you that ppl routine yeah yeah yeah please do i was gonna say to try
to dm me on uh dm me on twitter and i'll see that from you okay do you guys mind if i plug something
real quick before i do it no no we want to we want to. Yeah, so my buddy Hector, you guys know Hector.
He started this weed company recently with Pine Park.
And I am doing a weekly series for Pine Park
on their channel now where,
I think you guys might dig it too,
if you like weed movies,
where it's basically just-
We all like that.
You know, the first episode was five movies
you must watch while you're high.
The next episode is going up tomorrow
and it's my favorite directors to watch while you're high. The next one after that is going to be worse you must watch while you're high the next episode is going up tomorrow And it's my favorite directors to watch while you're high the next one after that is gonna be worse movies to watch while you're high
But it's you know it's like the intersection of like TV media and foam and
And I worked really fucking hard on it was like first time
I like wrote a script out and used a teleprompter and I was fucking nervous
But I worked hard and I was like super happy with the end result
So that's great a ton of fun with that
But yeah But I worked hard and I was like super happy with the end result and so that's great a ton of fun with that but yeah, we're trying to build up the the pine park channel to get people interested in that and
Obviously, I'm super proud of my buddy for for starting this project
And you know that's like one thing that like like it's weird because I've been doing this for like 13 years now
and there's a lot of things I'm proud of but I'm so proud to be a part of this thing because
marijuana has been very beneficial to me in my life.
And,
uh,
and he makes like pine park has really quality buds too.
So if you guys are interested and you live in California and you're 21 plus
it's delivery.pineparkhq.com.
And you can check out some of their products.
I have an affiliate code,
hutch,
all capital letters.
And,
uh,
it's,
uh,
it's really exciting.
So that's my plug.
Awesome.
Yeah. Everybody check that out. That's awesome, man. Thank that's my plug. Awesome.
Everybody check that out.
That's awesome, man.
Thank you guys.
I appreciate it.
I'm going to go now.
Yeah, good seeing you.
Take care.
All right, take care, guys.
Nice to see Hutch.
Always nice.
I wanted to ask him more about like what he's up to,
how Twitter's going,
stuff like that.
How Twitch?
I meant to say Twitch.
Yeah.
How's Twitter going well i'm
still making no money like well there's no way to do anything stressful way to make money on twitter
yeah but but is there a way outside of like selling an account or tweeting ads i guess you
technically make money on twitter if you make money on YouTube. I don't know what Twitter blue is.
Me neither, but how Drifter makes money.
Oh, okay.
I wonder how much is into it.
Like, what can you get?
It seems like some of these platforms,
Twitter, Facebook, TikTok,
they're really about being opportunity magnets
and they aren't in themselves opportunities.
Yeah.
Yeah, absolutely.
Who was it we were
uh talking to about tiktok's monetization like and how bad the cpm was we were talking to someone
about that yeah i i don't recall who it was it could have been drifter drifter or overt flow i
think that's who it was actually yeah yeah but he was like a two cent cpm something ridiculous
i don't have a tiktok but like every
once in a while like someone will tweet out their tiktok and like you click and you check it and
it's like how does someone with 22 000 twitter followers have 510 million tiktok views like
somebody in the view counter kind of putting their finger on the scale? Like what's going on here?
Yeah, that's – I don't know how that works.
It's so viral.
Stuff goes so big on there.
It's so easily shareable, I guess.
And there's those little quick clips.
Like I don't have a TikTok, but I see so many wild-ass clips with TikTok,
the logo before and after or whatever.
I just watched some Ukrainian sniper shoot a sniper shoot a russian with a thermal
scope like he's like he's like yeah well i get it and on the internet on normal old people uh
internet and then but it's got the tiktok logo at the end okay but no it's like fucking thermal
reticle on a like a glowing white guy and he's kind of shaky and then poof and the white guy
falls over and you're like oh my god it it looks just like you know a video game i don't know what i expected i've shot thermals in real life but it's still i've met
to see a person getting shot at with one on the internet is like a whole different thing i shot
a super long shot now maybe 150 meters at the most like you could tell you could see the the
man shape very clearly oh okay i wonder... Is it hard to spot the sniper?
Or can he get one shot off and then just be safe
if he doesn't shoot again
or just walks down the stairs of the building?
Like, what's the...
I wonder.
I guess it would depend on the situation, right?
But if he's got a suppressor,
they're not going to be able to tell really where he is at all.
Oh, I forgot about this impressor
oh we know how effective suppressors are on the small caliber stuff right like it turns a 22
into like a walmart bb gun not even like a pellet what is the airsoft gun right the spring-loaded
airsoft gun almost yes but when
you're shooting whatever this thing is supersonic i presume wow it'll sound like a 22 he's if he's
probably shooting something 30 caliber let's just say for like common common sake but like
it sounds like a 22 it's just a pow and it's also like uh the um the directionality is much
more difficult to pin down it it makes the sound very muffled and it's hard like the directionality is much more difficult to pin down.
It makes the sound very muffled, and it's hard to be like, yeah, right there.
You're like, I don't know, in that field of distance?
And if he only shoots once anyway, that's at night, clearly, too.
You can't see shit in this video.
Yeah, just the guy getting popped.
Oh, maybe mine was loaded bad. It just like after after the shot it just kind of like was so fuzzy i don't know uh did you guys see that video i sent before the show
in our group chat of only use me blade on the rv with andy dick with andy dick with the real andy
dick how far has andy dick star fallen i know he got me too a while back
and he was always known as like a creep and uh and a d-list celebrity but now he has fallen
into only use me blades rv like like next week they'll be fucking busting a can of spray paint
up against his head or something i watched like there there were like a couple like one minute clips on youtube of like only use me blade interacting with andy dick and honestly it's the
first clips i've seen of blade where he's not the drunkest guy in the room yeah like andy dick is
more fucked up and like there was one clip where like blade is clearly trying to like make
conversation like endear himself to andy dick and and Andy Dick is like fucked up not making eye contact
and he's like
Blade you're fat
he's like Blade's like making a
Jaeger drink he's like yeah I actually used
to be even bigger than this and Andy
Dick with like drunk eyes is like
how could you be bigger than that
and he's
how could you be bigger than that you're lucky to be alive
wow pot meat kettle so i saw blade in that video and thought he got bigger
excuse me um because he i was like impressed with his weight loss at one point and you guys both
educated me and said no woody you're not supposed to be impressed by that kind of weight yeah this is a person who's not taking care of himself this is like that's
my grandmother at the end of her life man she is shredded oh dude it's funny you say that yellow
wow i've mentioned it before we cared for my mother-in-law at the end of her life
yeah and i used to always be like babe you're look at you
cutting weight you're ready for bikini season when you told that story last week i i was i was
laughing and i wasn't laughing at what you were saying i was i was still laughing about like some
other stuff like my brain was in two places i didn't say anything then because i want to break
the train of you know or whatever but i but i certainly you were like you're laughing and i'm
talking about mother-in-law dying and i felt bad instantly because i was like you are talking about your
mother-in-law dying that actually really hurt my feelings i was talking about that today with a
friend of mine in real life i was like i don't even like i must have missed you did whatever
you were talking about it wasn't only that but like i was still on the other thing like like
and and and like when you said that like my brain caught up it's like oh
that is what we're talking about now i thought you were laughing like an inappropriate story in my
head this is the connection that i made it was probably false but i was like did i miss something
did i change the topic in a way that i wasn't supposed to like like he's laughing at how out
of touch i am and i don't know why i'm so out of touch like i'm very confused by this whole thing
but i i didn't know what happened there um i honestly don't know why I'm so out of touch. I'm very confused by this whole thing. But I didn't know what happened there.
I honestly don't remember exactly what happened
but I know for sure that I wasn't
laughing about your mother-in-law situation.
It was like, I was either laughing at the
previous thing. I might have been laughing at my own personal
joke. But when you said that, I was like
oh shit! I was like, oh shit, I am
laughing and he is talking about that. But those
things have nothing to do with one another.
It was one of the carryover jokes things where someone I am laughing and he is talking about that, but those things have nothing to do with one another. Yeah.
It was one of the carryover jokes,
things where someone may probably made a joke and then you're still laughing about that.
And then someone else starts on.
It's like,
if I,
if I do a funny Trump impression,
then I'm like,
I remember back to when my mom died and Kyle's like,
I'd be like,
you can't.
Yeah.
I think we were talking about this concept of like a death doula and, and how like, I was like, you cunt! I think we were talking about this concept of a death doula.
I was like, Taylor, I want to be your bad day doula.
I'll be the guy that makes sure you get medical care.
I'll get you back there a little faster, see the doctor.
This is the shit I'm good at.
I'm going to be like, you know, this guy with the gut arm.
I'm seeing shortness of breath.
I think you need to get him back there.
Do you have a respirator available
and uh cholesterol is clearly out of control
right look at him he brought salted meats into the waiting room i i did that for my kids once
like they were just not being seen and she was suffering badly and i'm like she's not breathing
well anymore and uh get her to the front of the line i'm your bad day doula and
then that shifted to how i would help my mother-in-law and uh and then somewhere along the
way we got disconnected i guess yeah no i thought about that at the show too and uh and uh i meant
to say something about it pk on pkn or even after the show but it just slipped my mind that happens
a lot where like i feel like we like bump into each other each other a little bit and maybe um
you know i maybe i say something that like seems like it's meaner than it is.
And it's generally not meant to.
Don't worry.
I'll laugh at my own jokes.
So those are the jokes.
This is important.
I don't want us to ever go to bed angry.
I want to text
when you
sometimes I'll say something and after the show I'll be like
why didn't I remember
that oh shit
I said that right after the other thing
now it seems like they're you need my gift Kyle
I don't remember anything we
talked about
I'm just so socially unaware that
I don't have these second thoughts
no i think about the show i'm like not always true i'm like that's not how far the earth is
from the sun why what are you thinking you didn't know right like little things like that bother me
like sometimes and then sometimes my brain just jumps completely off the tracks and i can't
remember simple things but i think some of this Delta eight might have something to do with that.
I mean that the dosages you're taking.
Yeah.
You got your,
your reminder notebook.
Can we go over edible doses?
What you guys like?
I,
I think I,
I memorized it incorrectly.
Kyle,
if you wanted to watch TV using an edible to enhance the experience I did,
or if you do you,
because I know my dose okay
it's 300 taylor uh i i could do 300 of delta 8 and i would not freak out i would be fine
but i would be higher than i wanted to be like if i take like 100 i'm feeling it like probably 150
honestly like and i'm good for most
of the night like pretty much the whole night that's what oh wow but that's delta eight so
keep in mind if i was in denver i would be using like it'd be like 40 milligrams
let me get my numbers while we're talking about it if i want to relax high. If I want to get pretty high, 16.
That's where I am.
You know what I did accidentally?
I drugged myself on accident this past week.
It was the first night I played Skyrim, so it worked out drugging myself.
But I got these new edibles from the store, and every edible I've been getting online has been 25 milligrams from all the companies that
sell those. They all do 25. And these, I didn't realize they were 50s. I just looked at the total
amount on the front where it said like 500 or whatever the total thing is. And I went home
imagining they were 25 and I ate what I thought was like 150. It was 300. And I was like in white run,
barely able to find Jarl Balgrif to even start the missions.
Like, all right, what are we doing?
He's in the long house.
Oh, he's in the long house.
Okay.
Oh, this guy from the companions is talking to me.
I wish he'd go away.
But it wasn't like fear or panicky.
It was just like once I realized I fucked up
and I looked at the package, I was like,
oh, this is my night.
I'm going to be like this level of fucking ripped
for hours and hours and hours.
I also use either THCO or HHC.
I'm mostly using HHC now.
Don't ask me what that is.
But 100 milligrams of HHC is very, very strong.
And the concentrate is very, very strong.
And it lasts for a long time.
I think it's stronger than just marijuana.
It might be.
It seems like it is.
It's real strong.
It's real cheap.
I wonder if I'm not using normal marijuana.
Maybe I'm using THC zero or something.
If you've almost,
if you're,
weren't you buying it like a gas station or something?
No,
it's a,
like a pot shop.
Like it's even their own brand.
Oh yeah.
It's almost certainly Delta eight.
That my guess is that's the cheapest one to make.
Um,
I don't know if they're,
they're charging based on demand,
artificial demand,
artificial scarcity or what, artificial demand, artificial scarcity,
or what, but
the Delta 8 is the cheapest
end of, it seems like, the
hemp derivatives, I'll call them.
Whereas, there's
some stuff that's more expensive than
just marijuana. It'll be like $90 a
gram, $100 a gram,
which is a tiny little amount.
But then, the Delta 8 will be like $2 a gram, $100 a gram, which is a tiny little amount. But then the Delta 8 will be like $2 a gram.
I don't do it very often. We're recording this. It's the 28th right now.
I might not have done it in April. So I'm not doing very much.
But they last forever for me.
And I like the gummies. Sometimes
when I camp, I want to sleep well
and it can be a sleep aid for me.
I like to travel
with it and that means chocolate sucks
or brownies and stuff like that.
But gummies travel really well.
No, that makes a lot of sense.
It helps me sleep really well.
Gummies are better than the vaping.
I like the edibles so much more
than vaping. The vaping like i i like the edibles so much more than vaping but if like
the vaping has its own thing where like if i let's say it's five hours before i have to be somewhere
and it's like a saturday i can hit that vape and by the time i have to go do that thing i've been
sober for hours like it's but if i did like edibles like that's i'm gonna feel that all day
and it's like edibles are like if you don't have anything to do or like if you're safe just being at home the rest of the night
that's my preference i've almost worn out of eight pens that's my vape experience one pen
and i have not developed the knack for really hitting it right i either hit it too hard and
get that coughing that's really unpleasant and doesn't go away quickly enough or i'm like did i even do it
right you know did i just put it in my mouth and blow it away and not inhale i think if you're
coughing you've done it right like i cough that's too oh you do oh yeah like i'm muting i mute my
mic you know but but like i'm sitting i've coughed a couple times with the show like sometimes it
just makes you cough and i have no reason for for that because sometimes it does and sometimes it
doesn't and it doesn't matter if it's it's not a have no reason for that because sometimes it does and sometimes it doesn't.
And it doesn't matter if it's not a bigger hit or a smaller hit.
Sometimes it's just like, whoa, that one really hit hard.
That one feels good.
I always try and take like five mini hits.
I'll try and take the hit as big as I can take up to the point that I think I might cough.
But instead of just taking one giant rip and hacking a lung out, I'd rather just do like six of those.
So my fear is, take that and exaggerate it to where you take a really mini hit.
Did it even get into your lungs?
Did it do anything?
It has to, right?
It should, I should say.
Probably.
You could take a hit so small and blow it back out that that hit didn't get into you, I think.
Yeah.
I just inject it now.
That way I know I'm getting it.
Yeah.
I hate the pen for all this like
insecurity I have around it like did I do it right oh my god this was either unpleasant or
this didn't work you know I'm doing six mini hits and I'm like how much of this shit am I wasting
I mean I wouldn't worry about it I wouldn't worry about it. I wouldn't worry about wasting it.
Like if you ever want like another pin of some strong stuff, like I'll send you the website and you could get like a pre-made pin like like this.
That's got like THC in it or the HHC stuff.
And you'll you'll you can go and you'll be high.
You don't have to mess fuss around and be like, oh, did I cough enough?
Like you'll just be fucking high. That shit is my my my use case though it really lends to gummies
it's like at night yeah maybe watch some tv and go to sleep uh and then wake up sober like oh and
i probably i probably don't know what i'm talking about here but it but all of the like like when
i'm in colorado or california the the pins and and and the oil that I bought there, it's not flavored.
It just has whatever flavors.
It's like, yeah, that's marijuana flavor.
But the THCO and stuff, it'll come in blueberry sundae flavor and vanilla surprise or some shit.
I haven't even seen that.
Oh, yeah.
I almost don't like that.
You can get your own terpenes and add them.
You know why I don't like it?
I'm afraid it'll go the way of vapes.
Suddenly, some congressman
is going to be like, oh, blueberry fluff?
You're marketing this to six-year-olds.
Oh, they're coming for it.
They're either
going to... Some places will try to ban
the Delta 8 stuff, and the
others will try to bring it into
the fold with the rest of the marijuana stuff.
But both is going to happen everywhere
rather than it just being this wild child
thing out there. That cannot remain. They will
want their peace. I'm glad the way it's going so far.
Seems like they're here to stay. A new store pops up every time I
drive to the city or drive further away. There's a ton of them. They're all over
the place. Don't buy from a store, though. Buy online.
Why do you say that it's infinitely cheaper oh it's i've never seen anything where online it it's a dollar
and at a store it's 30 but that's literally what we're talking about it's like yeah it's ridiculous
it's it you can buy it what's a dollar online with free shipping like two three day shipping
is 30 in a store that you walk into.
So it's, it's a massive rip off at the store.
The, I feel like the pens I bought at a gas station weren't anywhere near that.
Maybe I don't remember it correctly.
They're about 24 of $25 for a pen.
I think if you're buying at a store, cause they're usually like, I don't know.
They're usually, they usually have a gram in them, but I'm talking about,
I did it one time last year. I could just be wrong.
I don't know. Prices change all the time, too.
It depends what you're getting because there are so many products.
But yeah, I hope it stays out there.
Can I change the topic?
Yeah.
It appears that Ukraine's doing well in the east, which I heard they wouldn't.
For people who haven't been following this at all,
previously Russia kind of went deep into Ukraine and tried to take over some major cities
apparently that's really hard to do their supply lines were all fouled up plus the ukraine's had
this home court advantage that's particularly useful in like suburban and metropolitan areas
and they just kept freaking bashing tanks and etc the the russians also the ukraine's gained et cetera. The Russians lost so many. The Ukrainians gained tanks. They lost like 54
tanks and gained like 94 from the Russians for a net gain of 40 more tanks than they started the
war with. That's outrageous. So Russia changed its strategy, stopped attacking these cities deep
into Ukraine. And now they're attacking the East, which is mostly farmland and of course,
close to Russia. And all the reports i was reading
was saying this is a new test this is rough you know that they won't be able to just pop up out
of their rabbit holes shoot them and duck down anymore when the battle takes place in fields
and the russians won't be stabbing their own gas tanks and abandoning tanks when they're so close
to their own supply lines but it's been a week and a half two weeks
now and it appears that the ukrainians are still doing well yeah are you seeing that too yeah for
sure um i saw a video where a drone dropped what looked to me like a goddamn pipe bomb onto a car
full of russians and it's hard to tell but i think that motherfucker dropped it through the sunroof
and it got and it exploded and like the the russian jumps out of the car they all die long story short and the and the and the drone zooms in on the guy dying in the field and it's
pretty gruesome but no everything i've seen is that the ukrainians have been doing quite well
i've seen they've been lost they lost some villages today i saw that so it's it's not like
they're pushing the russ Russians off the map or anything.
But I also saw those strikes within Russia that seem like they haven't been specifically.
Were there recent new ones?
I missed it.
Yeah, like three or four warehouses that the Russians have been staging out of.
One of them is a couple hundred kilometers into Russia, like 120 miles or whatever that comes to, which is pretty wild.
20 miles or whatever that comes to um which is pretty wild they didn't explain whether these were airstrikes missile strikes or sabotage which is what i would imagine that they were that some guy
went there and like burnt the place down or blew it up or something uh they didn't explain that i
hate when they do that when they're vague you know why they sometimes do that to be vague they don't
give away the tactic right so they can use it again next time. Yeah. And this was also like, I think very recently was the first time that the Ukrainians,
when asked about strikes within Russia have been like, yeah, um, actions have consequences.
And yeah, the Russians, I heard them say that they were going to bomb Kiev. I hope I pronounced it
right. Uh, if they attack inside Russia's. And if I'm Ukraine, I'm not sure
how to respond to that. It's like
on one hand, they have long-range missiles, I think, that could attack Kiev, so it's not an empty
threat. On the other hand, we're at war.
You don't get to say no face punches.
We're fighting, bitch.
You came in my borders.
You think I can't go to yours?
You think you get to define rules like that?
I don't know.
It's tricky.
I think they're well within their rights,
and it's fine that they're taking the word of the Russians.
I hope it continues.
That's what I was talking about weeks ago,
that I wanted to see railway crossings and stuff like i'm not saying they're not within their rights
i just wonder it's a provocation they're provoking russia even oh by attacking is it smart
is it is it the right call i think there's probably some like old grandma in a burnt
out village who's like he could get worse! It gets worse! Fuck them! Blow the factories up.
Yeah, maybe.
I mean, Russia could nuke their capital.
Well, that wouldn't go well
for them. No.
Wouldn't go well for anyone.
I mean, the wind blows fucking east, for one thing.
True, true. That's a good point.
But
Russia is holding back.
So, I mean, that's just to say that's like saying donald serrani's holding back because he didn't bring a gun like as far as the rules of like the
conventional warfare they're not holding back at all they're executing torturing civilians
every woman i see dead in the street has blood coming out of her vagina like these guys are
are not are fighting a pretty
brutal war they just haven't used nuclear war weapons yet do they have conventional long-range
missiles too oh yeah they can they might not be using them because they're so expensive
they've been using them they've been they've the cruise missiles that they're shooting
all the time right those are the long range like you know okay maybe i don't know what i'm talking
about yeah so and you're right.
I actually,
I do remember some hypersonic stuff and whatever that maybe they don't want to
use really expensive,
really accurate,
really high end missiles on fucking,
I don't know.
I think it's the problem.
I don't think they have targets for them.
Do you really take out part of an apartment building with that?
Like why that's,
they use weird
weapons too like like um i saw them shoot some kind of a thing the other day that was like had
a long rope of explosive behind it um so it's like a i don't know like a 200 meter rope of
explosives that just landed and i thought it was going to land on the ground to like make a big
area of effect but they just shot off like a building with it i don't know it's it's been
interesting to watch on uh on the internet i don't i don't know it's it's been interesting to watch on uh on the internet
i don't i don't know anything about uh war but it seems like the russians don't either so it's okay
it's a proxy war with america which is tough oh i love those we're winning too like hand over foot
like just killing it during vietnam did we also feel like that
the russians felt like that because they won the proxy war in Vietnam.
That makes sense.
Yeah.
We felt like that in Afghanistan because we were the ones giving the Afghanis those stinger missiles that were knocking down those Russian helicopters.
Wow.
It really helps to be the proxier.
It's cheaper because a missile costs $ hundred thousand dollars and a tank costs 30 million
yes yeah i'm sure we can find it we're america kyle we'll make it more expensive
they i mean we'll use 30 million shipping the shipping was 12 million to get the hundred
thousand dollar rocket to ukraine probably was yeah not it's been probably true um i don't know
how the whole thing's gonna end the bill the amber
herd trial has been like my guilty little pleasure that i peek in on the other every day really she
seems monstrous the johnny depp yeah yeah the defamation suit man i i don't know if i'm
qualified to like bring you up to date but it just seems every time that i catch a clip it's
johnny depp looking like a saint um and Amber Heard looking like she's acting and being fake pouty and trying to be too pretty to find guilty.
And she's almost doing it, by the way.
It's a good thing I'm not the judge.
I side with her every time.
She's just so good looking, she's hard to look at.
That is how you determine guilt.
It is.
Unfortunately for her, the judge is a woman
I think in this case.
That or a very odd looking man. I'm not sure.
But no, it's gone
Johnny's way. All these witnesses
that come forward make Johnny Depp
seem like they're supposed to, granted.
But they're not making up the stories they're telling.
That guy who was like,
yeah, I was selling art on eBay for
$100, $200.
And Johnny saw some of my art and I thought he wanted to buy some when he got back in touch with me.
But he said, no, I want to put you in an art studio that you can live and do nothing but make art until you have enough to have an art gallery show.
And then we're going to have that.
And I'm going to throw it and I'm going to invite all my Hollywood movie friends and they're going to buy your art. And I don't want anything except for you
to succeed in life as an artist. And they're like, and what did you say? He's like, I said, yes.
Yeah. He's like, don't imagine a crappy apartment. This is like an art deco building, 15 stories.
a crappy apartment this is like an art deco building 15 stories it's a multi-million dollar place i'm in right now i don't do anything but what i love mr depp did that for me it's like
and every witness they bring up is like yeah johnny's just such a good guy and he was sitting
over there shitting in people's beds it doesn't look good even the bad stuff they're like after
she cut your finger off, did you want cocaine?
He's like, yes, yes, I did.
It sounded pretty reasonable, really.
I don't know how fun coke is. He deserves a little bit of cocaine after all that.
She should have bought him some.
It's like, they say cut off, but it got smushed real bad at the end.
It's all mangled up, and it didn't heal right. Or there wasn't enough to put on right. There's a at the end it's all mangled up and it didn't heal right or there
wasn't enough to like put on right there's a picture somewhere of it kind of mangled i don't
even know if we should show it it's no pretty gory i've seen it but it's yeah it's a real deal
fucking injury like it's a go to the hospital there is audio of her saying no one will believe
you because you're a man i mean she was right up until indisputable until they played the audio of her saying no one will
believe you because you're a man and no one believed him because he was the man until the
audio of that exactly people still don't believe him even though she's there saying no one will
believe because you're a man they're like that's right we won't wait wait but you understand that
she said yeah she said it she's a man like there are people who still won't live. But man, I really hope he wins.
I hope he bankrupts her.
And I wish that they would take that movie away from her
and give it to literally anyone else.
Yeah.
I mean, she seems like a real bitch.
Yeah, I don't like Pirates of the Caribbean,
but I feel bad that the dude doesn't get to cash in
on those stupid movies anymore and make his 10, 20 million. I think dude doesn't get to cash in on those stupid movies anymore and make his $10, $20 million.
I think he doesn't want to.
I heard him say he absolutely refused to make any more.
Because they turned their back on him when she came out against him and fired him from the movie.
He's like, they can't get me back now.
Oh, I didn't understand that kind of thing.
Oh, okay.
That changes things.
It seems like he's doing okay for money.
Oh, he'll be okay. But he lost a lot of money and that is because of what he did to him is there a difference
between having 50 million and 100 million yeah 50 million yeah about 50 million dollars but no
like there's a big difference between having 1 million and 5 there's a big difference between
having 5 and 10 we start to get into areas that i can hardly like imagine like 50
million you won't run out right just johnny would probably say but think of all the good i could do
with a hundred million he seems like a fucking philanthropist it's not like he's sitting around
like buying another jet ski like i don't know why that's what i would be doing yeah like an
extravagant eight thousand dollar purchase He's not doing things like that.
At $50 million.
Yeah, that was all the jet skis you want.
I think I went to that.
Johnny Depp's out there buying ping pong tables.
With good paddles.
And lacoste shirts.
He's out there ordering prime rib like a king.
I think I went to that because I think of a jet ski as a huge waste of money i i would never own one but i have never had more fun on the lake
than when i was like 12 and like my dad's friend let me drive a jet ski around it was a question
were you by yourself yes yeah it was awesome no so um i think a jet ski is the ultimate and super fun for you and
your buddy to rip around i had a jet ski in high school and then i just that's so awesome yeah i
would push that thing out in the ocean before school and rip just jump waves and shit and uh
um but it's really only fun with a friend doing it solo gets old so fast. Did you have the kind where you stand up? Yes.
I thought so. What do you mean?
You stand the whole time.
Some of them are like little boats
where you sit down and steer.
Oh, I've only done the standing kind.
Oh, yeah? Wow.
That's kind of badass.
It seems like... I want one that looks like a crotch
rocket, essentially, but for the
seas. That's the one I had, except the seat was so uncomfortable that you just stood the whole time
that sounds awful i wonder if you can rent one that's like legitimately fast because i've never
done that i've putted around like 30 miles per hour maybe which is fast as fuck on the water
mind you believably quick yeah yeah i might i'll never forget the time that like i was uh what were we doing i think i
was shopping for a jet ski i was jet ski shopping and uh and uh like i was buying a used one um and
uh this is what mine was like okay it's old it's out of date by today's standards but that's what
i had in high school that looks sweet i love the aesthetic of that i'm you show us what a modern... I'm not being ironic. I'm not joking.
Show us the 2022 Kawasaki jet ski.
I bet it's way less cool than that.
That looks sick.
I bet the new one looks like a fucking spaceship.
I bet you're in a bubble by now.
You're not even on something.
You're in it.
Woody, how old were you when you got the jet ski?
Oh, my God.
That seems like a huge thing to trust a kid a kid with wow that's a jet ski now
the little boats with three seats jesus christ oh shit um so when i first got my jet ski i couldn't
drive i was probably like 13 or 14 and you have to understand there were no traces of puberty in me
so i wasn't strong enough really to carry it across the
we had this um little it was like a trailer but it was held in the middle and to drag it across
the soft sand and the beach was a herculean feat for me i would just pull and pull and pull it
would take me like 20 minutes to get at the 100 yards but i was determined and when i finally
floated that thing i'd just go and rip on it
that sounds fun i would want something fast my um when i was looking at the jet skis my dad's friend
pulled up along the shore like weird coincidence we're on the lake this it's not right next to
where i live or anything and uh and he but he recognized me he came over and he had this little
boat i don't know how to describe it because it had it only had two seats and it had a giant either one or two gigantic engines on it.
And I don't know what its purpose was, but it went so goddamn fast that you couldn't see where you were going.
You got the lay of the land at one speed.
And then when he hit the accelerator, the front of the boat went up to the point where we couldn't see where we were going.
Shit. But we could see to the we couldn't see where we were going. Shit.
But we could see to the left and right of where we were going.
So we knew nothing had gotten in front of us.
Second and third most important directions.
In my memory, we went 80.
I don't know if that's true, but that's what I envision is 80 miles per hour on his little speedometer.
On the lake?
That's what I remember. That envision is 80 miles per hour on his little speed on the lake that's what i remember that's horrifying i could be wrong but he not like this his thing was not nearly this slick it was it was like a flat top and open and like there was like room to like
the seats were in the middle of a larger craft and there were two enormous engines on it
anyway maybe something like that looks that looks silly. What is that?
What am I looking at? Zoom in, Zach.
Don't make it so small. Yeah, I don't understand
what this is. This is like the cheapest...
I want to have fun, but not too much
fun.
Look at that
old guy. Look at the old guy in the background
with his young... I like his attitude.
He might be old, but he's ripping across the
water in a freaking...
After this, he's going to pop a Viagra
and then they can take a bath in separate tubs
and then fuck.
When we get back to the lodge, I'm going to ruin your box.
You're going to ruin your box.
Yeah, that classic term.
Box?
Is that an old term for vagina?
Yeah.
It's used now as like an ironic joke?
No, no, no, no.
It's just that was a pussy, a box.
You've never heard like the whole joke about like the plane went down
and all they found was the black box?
I haven't heard that.
A 9-11 joke about pussy?
I like that.
No, it's about black pussy.
But anyway, yeah.
I went to 9-11.
Yeah, I don't know why you went there.
But yeah, box is supposed to gash.
What others do you have?
I've heard slit.
Axe wound.
Axe wound I absolutely hate.
That's gross to me.
All the others were so classy.
This is funny.
I remember that conversation.
Zach over here coming in with a jizz junkyard.
No one calls it that.
Comes down and refers to the entire woman.
That's the individual.
Yeah.
A clam.
Clams.
You know a good one?
That criminally underused cooter.
Cooter.
Oh, I was going to ask you this earlier.
Because we were talking about you had the UTI when you were seven. I was going to ask you this earlier. We were talking about you had the UTI
when you were seven. I was going to ask you, when you
were a child,
what did you call your dick?
If you were going to tell a parent that something's
wrong with your dick, what would you call it?
Penis. Really?
Yeah.
Also penis, but I wish I had
something better.
Did you have a foo-foo or something i did i had
a goober what would you say oh mom my the dog was licking my goober and i like oh god no that's not
what i would say i would say i fell and i hurt my goober or whatever. I showed the neighbor girl my goober.
Kyle, you're 36 years old.
What's your point?
The problem is she was 12.
The neighbor boy is jealous I have a bigger goober.
He's seven.
Yeah, goober, that's hilarious.
No, my mom was like, I remember her being like, just say penis.
That's the correct word.
Like, there's nothing wrong with that.
And then day one of kindergarten, I was like, I was joking around or something.
And I said penis loud enough for the teacher to hear it.
And she took me into the hall and said, we don't use that kind of language here.
And I was like, okay, day one kindergarten.
I've got the coolest shirt I ever owned.
It was a bug shirt it had buttons on
it and there were actual bugs that you could button onto the different parts because i was
obsessed with bugs and i wanted to make friends and i also had a lunchbox that was a big fish's
mouth man i was i in my head i was the bell of the ball on the way lights on too did i what
you have your la lights on too i had my light up sneakers that's what i
mean that oh is that lights there was a they were the original la lights um i watched the whole
video i had the pay less shoes version i la lights might have been the pay less shoes version i don't
know but that's what i had as a kid when i was five six maybe first grade um i remember we all
had them and like we were walking you know single file to the bathroom maybe you go in shifts and like I just remember everybody was like flashing in the hallway as we
walked because all those were so cool I remember I had like a memory so vivid of being like five
leaving a friend's birthday party at the skating rink and it was dark by the time we left and I
could see my own light up shoes as I was walking and like having that thought of like I am so tight like I am awesome I'm so look at these kicks like and granted every
other five-year-old at the party had these shitty pay less light up shoes too but I just I remember
thinking oh no this they had a they had a dinosaur on the side they had a dinosaur on the side and that made mine cooler. It was either a dinosaur or a bug.
LA Legends Sears.
Yeah.
No, the shoes were definitely the thing.
But they definitely went out of vogue, I guess.
I haven't seen them in a long time.
Until the other day, I was watching MasterChef.
And one of the contestants inexplicably had light-up sneakers on.
Kids have them now.
It's hilarious.
I don't really see too many kids in my day-to-day life.
Okay.
They're still popular
and they're still badass.
They should push them for the elderly.
Keep up with them.
Making sure that people know when they're crossing the street
slowly or causing a problem.
They should wear hats that do that too.
Hats?
A little beacon on their head.
String a bunch of Christmas lights around the old.
Can you get light-up shoes in these ties?
No, you absolutely can.
It comes with a helmet.
Oh, shit.
They've got light-up shoes that light up the tops,
not just the bottoms.
A leash.
What? It comes with a helmet and a leash.
And just a random
bin of assorted buttons. Dude, you have no idea
how cool these shoes were in
1991.
Check the ones that I...
Zach, zoom in on those. Check out how badass they are.
Damn!
I would be the bell of the ball with shoes like that.
I swear. Hang on. Wait, what's the company? Optic? Optic Sneakers? Damn! That would be the bell of the ball with shoes like that. I like that.
Hang on. Wait, what's the company?
Optic?
Optic Sneakers? Is that what I'm looking for?
Yeah, this is...
It says brightledshoes.com
You have to charge your shoes.
You're goddamn right I do.
Wait, lights last over
five hours? That's not long enough.
How long do you walk?
Well, I mean, if I'm going out to dinner, I want people to...
If I'm disrupting a movie by putting my feet on the...
What movie are you watching?
Five hours should get it done.
No, I was meaning like, what if I go out to dinner, then I have to go to a movie and I want everyone who sits behind me to see my shoes?
Okay, wait, wait.
So every pair, I believe, has seven different colors it can do in
four different flashing modes oh those aren't the same pair no no that's what i'm saying i think the
one pair will do all those things yeah i thought these were different choices i had to make instead
oh this is an investment this is look how cool that purse that she is.
Okay.
That's a dude.
Dude, did you scroll down and see him in action, the video?
No.
It's blinding.
This will give you a fucking seizure.
I want to see what happened.
Look at the apartment they're charging them in.
Well, you know, look past that. Sometimes you've
got rent or you've got shoes. But wait,
they're not lighting up the tops.
They're lighting up the soles in the video. Am I looking at
the wrong video? I think they only do the
soles. That can't be right because
they just showed a million pictures of the whole thing.
Yeah. I think they're using a black
light to achieve that maybe.
I don't know. I'm looking at it here. I see the whole
top glowing like mad. That video doesn't match the shoe. See, these ones suck maybe i don't know i'm looking at it here i see the whole top glowing like like mad i said that video doesn't match the the shoe see these ones suck i don't want these
i feel like this is a business expense and i should check these out for the show i think we
should all be able to write this off on our text this is a great gift for family and friends
okay want to gift each other shoes i mean shoes? I wear a 12 if you just want
to run this through the PKA account.
I wear a 13.
Same thing. Send me.
Do they accept PayPal?
Put it in the
PKA account.
They take PayPal.
Should we all get it?
I'll buy them.
I'll be the only one who's not choking. No, I'm'm gonna work out in these shoes now
i'm gonna i'm gonna tell somebody that that like they measure my power level
that that i wear a size 11 you guys wear 12 oh oh i can't they'd all 11 12 13 yeah you'd need
three different shipping addresses too so you couldn't do one bulk order.
You'd have to do three individual orders.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's so hard to do.
Yeah, that could take years.
An incalculable amount of time.
No, but first you'd have to know where we live.
No, I'm probably going to buy the sneakers
later.
I'm in if it actually does light
up those white fibers over the top.
If it's just the sole, that's
not even worth a joke. That one's
not very cool. If you scroll down, there's different styles, too.
There's like, I don't
know, black high top. There's all sorts
of different styles on there.
I wish that Velcro shoes were more accepted outside of mental institutions. I don't know why There's like black high top. There's all sorts of different styles on there. I wish that Velcro shoes
were more accepted outside of mental institutions.
I don't know why you'd want a style
other than not very
cool nurse.
No.
I think Velcro makes everything
better. I don't know why bras aren't Velcro.
Like, can anyone explain that to me?
Why bras aren't Velcro?
Only one guess. Velcro doesn't do laundry
very well if you wash velcro a lot it picks up fuzzies and stuff i bet we have the technology
to make a what oh counterpoint counterpoint you hand wash bras you don't machine wash braziers
that's not true your wife only machine wash my clothes
your bras?
yeah my brassieres
first of all it's a man's
I will say
my fishnet stockings
sometimes break in the wash
but my bra's not
I've got to run
in my pantyhose
oh Zach links some new shoes too I've got to run in my pantyhose.
Oh, Zach links some new shoes, too.
This is perfect.
Maybe you can go to goat.com slash PKA and find your own 100% authentic light-up shoes.
I'm sure there's some light-up shoes on there.
You could probably get some OG LA Gears on there.
Or LA Lights or whatever they were.
I imagine goatat.com
tries to cater to a cool audience
that isn't buying light-up shoes.
It's retro
shoes. It's like all sorts of throwback
Jordans and stuff that I think look like
everyone should buy them.
They look
so tight.
Everyone's going to be talking about you as you walk in the room.
I mean, I'm too white to wear some of those sneakers.
I mean, and I just can't appreciate them, I'm sure.
But I mean, I'm definitely going to buy these light up sneakers.
That's happening.
You know who's a sneakerhead?
Only use me blade.
Honest to goodness, he is a secret collection he was proud of.
Is that a drug he does? A sneakerhead? Only use me blade. Honest to goodness, he has a secret collection he was proud of. Is that a drug he does? A sneakerhead?
No, that's the term for people who
are into collecting sneakers like I do Leatherman's.
Oh, I heard only
use me blade and drug. Okay.
Yeah. Now, Blade's moving up
in the world, hanging out with Andy Dick.
Who other celebrities do you think
he'd hang out with? Chris Hansen
in a few years? He already has. He already has. Oh, that out with? Chris Hansen in a few years?
He already has. He already has. Oh, that's true.
Chris Hansen a few years ago.
Okay, I'm looking for that one.
I don't know. I don't know
who else is in his
sphere, but it is mind-blowing
to see Andy Dick
in an RV with
Blade sitting there like talking drunk.
Here's one for you.
Let's talk different trajectories.
I'm almost positive Andy Dick
works side by side with Joe Rogan on News Radio
back in the day. That's true.
And from there,
they took two different paths.
Largest broadcaster on
Earth. RV with Blade.
They're both podcasting but uh
i wonder what he's up to nowadays he invented the rv concept yeah i think he just he got in trouble because he did that pump and dump what are you talking about i i need to get in touch
with him about about um that money I sent him for our crypto.
I sent him $13,000 and he said I was going to double it.
Yeah, so he's probably, I don't know, mitigating that, trying to balance it out with starting streaming again.
I can't imagine his community is going to be cool with him ever again.
Because we watched that clip of him talking about it. We all did. They were like, so let me help you.
Help me understand, Ice. What you did is you
pushed it and then when it hit
a mass that you could make
money, you pulled the funding stock
out and that was it.
You made your money and he's like, that's correct.
You pumped it
and then you dumped it. He's like, strictly
speaking, that is correct.
I don't really like how you're phrasing So you pumped it and then you dumped it. And he's like, strictly speaking, that is correct. Yeah.
I don't really like how you're like phrasing it exactly the way it happened.
But legally speaking, yes, it is a pump and dump.
It was called rugging it.
He pulled the rug out.
Remember that?
Yeah.
And yeah, no, you're like, I can't imagine his community will ever be cool with him again.
Dude, his community has come back to him
a couple times already like i guess they hated his girlfriend so he just pretended to dump her
and continued to date her along like for months such a no big deal this is like robbing people
knowingly telling someone to invest in something that you know will lose them every penny that they
put into it. Knowingly doing that to someone is
beyond shitty. It's just like getting
donations. Not at all.
Fuck him.
It's like getting donations
to start a company,
but don't worry, you're all going to get the profits
when the company gets off the ground.
They invested. He said that
the people who bought these things knew how to lose money already they were all as all investors do
as all investors i don't know like i'm genuinely interested in the psychology behind it because i
feel like this is almost an acceptable relationship with his subs like yeah i'm i am here to make money off of you people and
i do it any way that i can i will tell lies i will run scams welcome to the show is that not the show
no i i don't watch him but like it's definitely different like he didn't worry there's no way he went into that thinking this is going to be a great opportunity.
This is going to be its own currency.
Lots of people are going to make money.
A rising tide raises all ships.
We're all going to make out like bandits.
Like, no, he clearly didn't do that.
He went into it.
And there's video of him talking about this, too.
Like some other guy like Sam Pepper did the same thing.
And they like were talking about it in like a way of adulation
like man what do you think he's doing now he got his two million or so and he's out man they're
like wow i wish someday i could rob people or scam them it's not robbing i wish i could scam
people the way he did well that guy was a scammer for the ages because apparently i scam for like
if my number's not perfect it's close like, like 350,000, 400,000, something like that.
Yeah.
But Sam Pepper scam for a couple of million.
And they were just really admiring how effective that scam was.
Yeah.
So he just copied what someone else did after explicitly spelling out that he wanted to do something similar.
And then he did it.
I don't like how people are talking about what I did in exactly the terms
and way that I did it.
It's like, what the fuck, dude?
No, that shit is so fucked up.
I don't know.
That gets in my craw.
I don't like that.
Like tricking people that have been supporting you.
They're the reason that he's not working at subway.
100%.
They're the reason that he's not making sandwiches at subway fitness,
but yeah,
LA fitness,
whatever.
But like turn around and just full throatedly say,
fuck you.
Like,
I'm going to take your money and I'm going to dump it and pull the rug.
And then I think that there's this,
like,
I think there's this,
like,
I don't want to call it and pull the rug and then i think there's this like i think there's this like i don't want to call it a false narrative there's this perception that everyone who got involved
were his core group of guys who normally watch him and operate a robot with a knife on it and
they know who ice poseidon is and they know his alter ego and they knew his ex-girlfriend and
they knew the shit he's done in the past but Of course, there are those, but then there are
levels that extend out from beyond that with less and less familiarity
with him and his product and his persona and
the show. Those people, certainly, plenty of them
got swooped up in the mania that may have been
artificially created by him.
And look, from what I've been told, he made restitution to quite a few people.
He sent money back.
Did he send it all back?
I haven't heard that.
But I was told he sent amounts of money back that would have been difficult for anyone to send back.
Tens of thousands of dollars.
And that, to me demonstrates that like there's
something there because if if you're doing this as a villain who's like i got it all and i'm
heading for the hills you don't give a penny back yeah most recent video was in september of 21
so he's not uploading videos is he on the internet anymore no i don't know let's see
let's take a look that would seem as though he's doing exactly what a lot of people said.
Is cutting and running.
Let's see what he's up to.
Hasn't tweeted since February 1st.
Oh,
and that was a response to being like called out for ripping people off
in his career.
It looks as though it did the best part is he we talked
about pumping and dumping right here with him um yeah yeah and he won the show and explained it and
he was excited about the prospect of it and it was like that sopranos episode where like the
the cousin brian is joking around about the hud scheme. Then a month later, Tony's like,
yeah, a little gift for you
for the good ideas you gave me. He's like,
you did that?
It was kind of like
that. We were all goofing around. Hypothetically,
we'd rip everybody off and pump
it up. He's like,
fuck you. It wasn't a good investment
if that's how it went down.
Let's say that he gave back a substantial amount of money.
That $350,000 I talked about turned into $250,000.
I'm making this up, but work with it.
$250,000 for his career?
That's not a good trade-off.
He's probably making something close to that annually.
He forgot.
He still has all of that coin.
Oh, yeah.
He's the sole owner of PooCoin or whatever the fuck.
Actually, PooCoin would probably be a much more lucrative thing to own. I mean, that's billions. oh yeah he's the sole owner of poocoin or whatever the fuck actually poocoin
would probably be a much more lucrative thing to own
I mean that's gotta be that's billions
I don't know
it could be billions
so you need to invest
it could be fucking dog shit
oh what a mess
yeah too bad he
I wish he didn't go like that I wish he
didn't do it I bet he wishes he didn't do it too
i get like the the same vibe i get from like that stuff like it's not not even close to equivalent
what he did was was fucked up like but seeing like celebrities trying to sell nfts is like
i don't believe you i think you're a artist. I think you're a huckster.
If there were a ton of money in NFTs,
you'd be buying them, not selling them.
That's the way it would work.
This is going to be this picture of this ape.
Woody, this is going to be worth a million dollars in two years.
This can be yours for nine grand.
It's like, oh, wow, I'm either the dumbest man alive
or I'm trying to fool you
into buying something that is useless or worthless.
And I'll get someone saying in like my comments or reaching out to me, messaging me.
You just don't understand NFTs.
Yep.
True.
But like you can look at the pattern surrounding this and how quickly some areas of it have already collapsed and be like, OK, well, this isn't this.
People will be like when crypto came out, people acted like this, too.
No, they didn't.
I remember that.
People were like, it was not at all the same vibe,
NFTs and crypto.
I agree.
I think in my little universe, my observable universe,
NFTs have already peaked and they're back down.
People have recognized it's the scam.
Anyone who's buying NFTs now is the bag holder.
They're going to be left holding the bag and lose all their money remember we had that guest on our show was it doug polk maybe something like that and he was like you guys hear about nfts and crypto
and we were like ah you know i i'm gonna go with my guaranteed method of breaking even by just
staying away from this shit i wonder where it was when he
said it and where like it went to like what was the ride because i think nfts bullshit crypto
might still be way up i haven't heard about bitcoin in a while i think it is i mean it's
on a great trend like it's bitcoin's been outperforming every major market for 12 years or however long it's been a thing.
What, 2011?
It depends on the time period, right?
Because if you go from, say, November of last year, it dropped in half-ish.
That's true.
But if you've held it since the beginning, then you're making a ton of money.
Yeah.
and you're making a ton of money.
Yeah.
Ah,
that would be like suicide fuel to be that guy who spent 11,000 Bitcoin on pizza.
Can you imagine being that guy today?
I feel like that guy,
like I,
um,
when I was at Cisco,
I had stock options and I don't know,
I think I couldn't sell him,
but,
but I was,
it was just a good amount of money.
It wasn't a ton,
but it was,
I was a multi hundred thousand air where stock options from Cisco. couldn't sell them but but i was it was just a good amount of money it wasn't a ton but it was i
was a multi-hundred thousand error with stock options from cisco and before i vested to sell
them the dot-com boom group dot-com crash happened that's what i'm looking for and um and you know
it was like shit i didn't cash out i couldn't cash out and I lost a lot of money. So, well, potential money. So, uh, yeah,
anyway, I've been there. I think it helped me though. I think that somewhere in my YouTube
journey, I was like, all right, you know, like be smart about this. Don't think it never ends.
Don't think this ride only goes up. Uh, it was a good education. So what are we looking at here this is what these things have sold for
a million dollars for moonbirds is this wealthy people laundering money somehow anytime i see
weird shit being bought for a lot of money i'm like i don't know sales in the past week oh so
there are people are still buying expensive shit moonbirds i'm with taylor i don't understand why
anyone would pay a lot for these things
i don't get it either but i'm i've been wrong about so much shit so many times like i could
be a million billion percent wrong about this too especially this area i've been wrong about
i've been consistently wrong about crypto from the start like hang my head on it
oh yeah i've i've made precisely zero correct calls in the last 10 years.
But everybody listened to my take.
Oh, Kyle, I have those exact same ones, man.
Rings, huh?
Yeah, I just got them in the mail.
It's somewhere in front doorstep.
Do you have the black straps to loop it around like the top of the rack?
Yeah, that's the important part about the rings.
Like how adjustable are they?
How do you get them even?
Here's what I want though i want like a monkey bar situation with pegs that i hook these onto
and i traverse that's insane well you're gonna build a monkey bar setup i guess it's a yard thing
oh i just said i want it hear me out hear me out remove the rings and traverse the monkey bars
well that's just monkey bars yeah i know what are the rings you've lost me
the rings seem like an extra level of complication that don't help at all you know what would be like
a funny video like a bit like you know how some people work out like those really jack guys like
on the bars and equipment
and like playground stuff oh yeah yeah like kyle you have the body to do it if you like
wore the skimpiest little tank top and like are we going to high rise shorts you go to like a
public children's park oh no and like you're working out so hard like pushing kids out of
the way they're like getting behind you to use the slide.
And you're like,
I got two more sets.
You have two sets of the slide.
You're just like,
yeah,
it's a three by 12 hypertrophy slide.
It'd be fun.
If like Pete Kyle went and hung out with all like the Venice beach,
great people,
but sucked.
I actually can't do muscle ups.
That's not a thing. I actually can't do muscle ups. That's not a thing I train.
Just completely disappoint.
Just tear
your bicep.
I think the rings will be fun.
I've wanted those for a while.
I also got the rep bench. I ordered that
a couple days ago.
I got a red one.
I didn't get the $600 one, though.
I decided that it was just way overbuilt
for what I'm never going to need
to hold 1,500 pounds.
I think I got the Rep 3100
or something like that in red.
Google it, Zach.
Show us.
Rep 3100.
Well, I mean, Rep makes great shit.
Yeah, it's still a really good bench
and everything.
It's just not the crazy,
most expensive top of the line.
Does it do decline?
I'm almost positive it does.
I don't ever use decline bench.
Ever.
I've been incorporating that just to try to hit lower chest.
It feels unsafe a little bit on my current system.
I'm looking forward to getting into my new place
and getting the uh
the cage or whatever the the whole rack in that's the one kyle no that's close the it's the ab3100 yeah i i see that i it that looks nice fine no wait is it one of those ones
that does decline by sitting backwards on it?
No, wait, that doesn't have decline.
No, because of that post.
But sometimes they have declined.
They're just like, turn your head around and go the other way.
I don't know.
He probably closed his tab looking for tabs. I bet he changed to the rep fitness tab on this one.
How close have you been to doing that?
Where you're like i'll google it
i left the show his device disconnected and he left okay do you not go full screen on this
when we're doing the show no i have other notes around like oftentimes i'll think of a topic but
rather than interrupt and change to it i write it down and if we get to it we get to it, we get to it. If we don't, we don't. Yeah. I use,
uh,
actually it's just notepad on the side.
I set up a,
a third monitor.
So now I've got a,
a three monitor set up.
I got,
um,
like a 27 inch 4k Asus,
a bunch of numbers at the end.
And I hooked up my,
my Xbox in my living room right now.
Cause I was playing last night Skyrim,
but I like played a couple games in 4K on here.
And I've always made the joke like, oh, my eyes can't even see 4K.
It is truly better.
It's really noticeable where I'm like, oh, my God.
Even games that aren't even taking advantage of the full graphics.
Like NHL 22.
Why does this look good?
Everyone knows EA games look like hot
shit like graphically but even it looks more impressive skyrim looks better you know you
should consider as a three monitor guy myself put the two side ones in portrait mode because for me
if you make them all wide by the end of it you can't even see over there like that that's not
usable space but if you make the side
one's portrait it pulls them in a little bit and i can use the whole thing that's a good idea i'm
gonna i'm gonna switch that because you're right it's it's absurd total space there is yeah it's
like if i want to read something over here you put whatsapp and it's like the adjacent room like that is like the if there
if the middle part was like i don't know the peak neighborhood where your most valuable closest apps
go on the side is the ghetto like that is the low value real estate on your screen over there
i mean really i got it because i'm gonna be kicking up streaming again soon i want to do that more and i like the two monitor thing i was always like it's fine like sure i have to like i have
one just devoted to the stream and i have to close and open stuff because oh the notification
showed up on stream labs but not in twitch or whatever and but three if i can just have like
the game or whatever i'm doing just fucking the Twitch chat and everything to read,
and then just the donations that don't get picked up on Streamlabs.
It's going to make it so much more seamless to go between stuff.
I don't know.
I'm looking forward to it.
I'm excited.
I'm trying to figure out what game I want to stream.
No one gives a fuck about NHL, so that's on the top of the list.
Magic the Gathering Arena.
That would be funny. Just come back because I have so many people like stream again stream stream stream
it's like guys i'm back but i'm a magic the gathering streamer only now
i'm gonna come back and just live stream lawn care just just mow and live stream
that would be great and like don't even do a good job.
I can't hear you over the tractor.
Just like out there, like kind of half-assing.
You're like, you know what?
It's a big yard.
I'll get the rest of it tomorrow.
I'm missing stripes all over the place.
There's no, you're like're you don't go straight lines slapdash all around that
would be good content i would like that or if you did something like i with your skill set i would
like to see would be something with woodwork because woodworking is so cool like people
who can like do stuff with their hands on that level and create like an end table it's so
interesting like i'm not gifted in like the i i'm not good at that kind of stuff and so i enjoy
watching it so that would be an interesting hobby like i've thought about that recently and it's
like i'm not sure i even liked doing it i like i was proud of the skill set i was proud of the skill set. I was proud of the stuff I made. And like,
I,
there's some like dopamine release and accomplishing a project,
like completing a thing.
I liked that.
But as far as actually standing in the garage,
measuring shit,
I'm like,
is this fun?
I don't know that this is fun.
I think I just like the accomplishment on the other side.
It's a,
you know, sometimes I don't know. Sometimes acro paragliding feels like that like is this fun because i'm literally like carsick right now i'm
laying on my back at the clouds for this awful feeling to pass i'm exhausted i'm really proud
of the shit i did i'm proud of the level of pilot that i've attained but sometimes the actual doing
of it is like training you know like it fuck was swimming fun no being successful at swimming was
fun yeah that that's an excellent way to put it because i i think back about hockey with that in
the same way where like i look back and i'm like did you have fun playing goalie and the
immediate and honest answer is not at all like it's a horrible position to put yourself in like
everything hinges on you like it's so you let it go and you can't even go back to the bench and
blend in with everybody else you're just that guy and everybody hates you now and like you can fuck
shit up and it's just but if you look for the fun stuff it's
like damn like there were times where i absolutely robbed games single-handedly and all the blame
that comes when you fuck up and let in a softy is inversed and like you're the hero oh taylor
thank you so much you saved our asses and the whole team is like, thank God you're here. And you're like, yeah, thank God I was here indeed to stop the puck.
But like, yeah, overall, if I could go back, I wouldn't do it again.
Or if I did do it again, I would be a forward.
Being a forward is the ultimate way to play.
You half ass, you don't back check very hard.
So what?
You're a forward.
You're not going to get reamed that hard.
You miss a shot. Everybody's going to forget who you were the second you skate off the ice
like you make a goal to miss shot right yeah yeah that's fair too shit you know like you
you literally go wide on net like yeah that happens at every level all the time i guess if
it's a wide open net you're supposed to hit the net. But typically, you're aiming for the corners,
so the shit and miss happens all the time.
Oh, Kyle's not here.
The hockey playoffs starting up.
The season is ending.
Carolina Hurricanes, your team of the year because the Flyers are...
116 points, second in the Eastern Conference,
only if the Florida Panthers have more.
And so they're going to play.
Who is it?
The second wild card team.
They'll play the Capitol.
No,
Boston.
They'll play Boston.
So that'll be a tough one to see it.
But I,
I've still got Carolina in that.
I would love to see a team that hasn't won a cup in a long time.
Go on a run.
I Tampa's probably my second favorite team after the blues.
Cause I've been to the arena, watched them there. My dad lives there, but they've won two in a long time go on a run i tampa's probably my second favorite team after the blues because i've
you know been to the arena watched them there my dad lives there but they've won two in a row
enough enough enough enough so yeah what's this is it boston or no nashville nashville
does that say 2021 is this last year's stanley cup playoffs yeah this is last year
yeah this is last year i was suspicious when I could tell who won. Yeah.
Thank you for that pertinent info, Zach.
I was like, this has all the answers.
You guys are like, do you remember hockey last year?
No, that's hilarious, man.
But I was like, Nashville? That doesn't make any fucking sense. They west but like oh that COVID season but uh yeah and the blues meanwhile are playing midi smitties
minnesota wild in the first round it's still still up for grabs who's gonna get first uh or who's
gonna get um home court home ice advantage because the second and third place teams play each other.
Minnesota's in second right now.
St. Louis is in third, but they've been neck and neck for a while.
And so I feel like I'm going to fucking –
someone's going to clip this and send it to me in a couple weeks when we lose.
I hope so.
But I feel –
Make it clip-worthy. Start fresh.
Yeah.
So my 100% guarantee is that the st louis blues beat the minnesota wild in the
first round and that's because i think over the past like you know how teams just have other teams
that they're snake bitten against and they just can't like in every sport that's a thing for some
reason the wild struggle harder against the Blues than any team in the league.
You go to the Wild subreddit during games.
I like to get – I'll go to the different hockey subreddits
during Blues games sometimes to get what they're focusing on
because you get a better perspective.
Like, oh, you know, the Blues are winning,
but Kaprazov has been great with XYZ.
And I'm like, oh, I'll pay more attention to that.
But all of them are like, anyone but St. Louis.
Please, anyone but St louis please anyone but because
the blues i think are 12 0 and 1 against them over the past four years so they can't lose so
they can't guarantee to beat the wild guarantee the taylor lock of the night the blues are going
to beat the wild but honestly i'm kind of nervous about it because anytime of course something like this they do and even after 2019 when we won the cup i'm still like yeah but
yeah a little too good to be true eh like this is how hockey playoffs work they like
the hurricanes beat the bruins they're guaranteed to get either the rangers or the penguins
it's not one of those deals where like the first round you inherit the schedule of the person yeah i guess you do inherit
the schedule of the team you beat yeah i don't know on the same schedule yeah yeah i'm trying
to remember which sport does it the other way like the best team available goes against the
worst team available so you don't know what the second round is going to be because you don't know who will be the worst team available.
Did hockey do that?
I'm not sure.
I'm not sure.
But anyway, this is set.
So the Hurricanes should have a pretty easy ride throughout.
We'll see how it goes.
A pretty easy ride throughout.
Yeah, I mean, I don't want to see Boston win.
Boston as a city has gotten too many championships
in the last 20 years.
It's time for someone else to get a turn.
So I don't think the Blues are gonna win the stanley cup obviously but man if colorado won i'd
be cool with that they haven't won since like the fucking joe sackick era if carolina wins i'm down
with that if florida the florida panthers that would be great they've neverthers, that would be great. They've never won, so that would be cool. I want to see Toronto win because it would be so cool to see how excited everyone in Toronto is
because they're such a big market and they've been waiting so long.
So that would be cool.
But the other side of me is it would be also hilarious if they got swept again
or they lost in the first round again.
Because every year, if you follow hockey like I do,
like, you know, Toronto media, they're the big,
they're the grand poobah of media.
Everything revolves around Toronto in the hockey world.
And every year they are like Charlie Brown running at that football,
posting all their stats,
posting how they're the greatest Leafs team of all time.
And every year they get trounced in the first round, not trounced,
like they'll lose in game seven over and over and over to Boston.
But yeah.
So either way with the Leafs,
what I don't want to see from the Leafs is around to exit.
I want them to get swept in the first round or win the cup.
One of those two things,
because that would be max entertainment.
But yeah,
I'm excited.
My Philadelphia 76ers just advanced out of the first round.
That's already going?
Basketball.
Yeah, yeah.
They're always a week or so ahead of hockey.
They won the first three games of a seven-game series.
And then they lost.
There were two blowouts.
And then there was a close loss.
And you're like, all right, so it's not a sweep close loss.
It'll be fine.
Then they got blown out.
And the 3-0 turned to 3-2.
And I'm like
but tonight they won get the score 132 to 97 they scored a ton and they held them back and they won
by like 40 points i'll take yeah that seems terrible not 40 but whatever 35 that's a pretty
low scoring game nba if they don't crack three digits, right? Yeah, I would say losing teams don't crack three digits a lot.
Anyway, they're off to the next round.
I'm not sure who they play next, but I'm looking forward to it.
Little Sixers action.
It's their year.
I hope they win, for your sake.
That'd be nice.
They do this blockbuster star-for-star trade with the Brooklyn Nets.
At first, I felt like we traded away.
He's a bit of a head case, but he's a promising young player.
And we got this aging player who doesn't play D anymore, but scores and whatever.
So I'm like, I feel like we kind of lost this.
Plus, we gave a lot of other picks and players who are like lesser.
Cool, cool. so now the season
plays on we get hardened he's kind of gelling with the team he's working he's part of the he's part
of the reason we're winning the head case we traded fucking faking an injury fakes an injury
fakes an injury fakes an injury playoff start oh my back man i don't think i could play that he's
gonna come back he's a game four game four i'm coming
back right everything's on the line they lose game three and he's like oh actually i can't help you
on this elimination game what the hell is wrong with this guy fake back injury and like yeah so
why what does he have to gain from faking it he He gets to not play. Like he doesn't.
Wouldn't you want to play?
Like you got more contracts coming up in your future.
I assume you want to make money.
He has like a two or three years left on his contract.
And he didn't play at all this year.
All year long.
He's first he faked a back injury.
And then he said he had a mental health issue.
And he couldn't play because he was down in the dumps.
And then he got traded to the Nets
and the back injury came back.
That sucks.
He is the most hated
player in the NBA now.
What's his name? Ben Simmons.
Everybody hates him. The Sixers
hate him. I think Brooklyn hates him now too.
Dude, all the other basketball
players hate him.
He's ruining the money. He's like ruining the money.
So basketball players get a lot of money.
And Shaq told it really well.
He's like, Dr. J set this up for, I'll make it up, Jordan.
Or for Magic Johnson.
And Magic Johnson set it up for Jordan.
And Jordan set it up for me, Shaquille O'Neal.
And then Shaq set it up for this Le, you know, LeBron James or whatever.
All these guys are making more and more and more because they turn out to be
good business investments for the basket,
for the team owners.
And then Ben Simmons is fucking with the money.
They get these guaranteed contracts where they're,
you know,
in basketball,
in football,
you get a $70 million contract.
You're never going to see that money.
It's a joke in basketball.
You will,
you will get all that money. They can't fire you. Even if you're hurt going to see that money it's a joke in basketball you will you will
get all that money they can't fire you even if you're hurt you still get paid ben simmons is
going to change the he's he's 23 hours deep into a call to game ben simmons is going to change the
next collective bargaining agreement because he just flat out said he won't play. And they had to trade him. And even after he got traded, he continued not to play.
And it's all like if he had real injuries that you could see on an MRI or something, it would be different.
But instead, it's literally like I need more time in therapy.
This guy's a fucking douchebag.
Like doing that and fucking up everybody else's ability to collectively bargain with the owners and everything is so selfish.
He's not really fucking himself up.
It looks like he makes like $29 million a year.
But you're fucking up all those guys, like the average NBA player who's in the show for two, three years.
And then they're bounced because they're not good enough.
That guy isn't going to make enough.
He won't have guaranteed money anymore. They're going
to change the way that this whole thing is
structured because Ben Simmons
fucked the owners so hard they can't agree
to deals like this anymore. If they do,
Ben Simmons has laid
the yellow brick road
on how to fuck over owners.
And now anyone can do it.
He's getting paid.
Fuck this guy.
Just found out about him.
Don't like him.
And the Sixers, meanwhile,
are advancing into the next round.
And the team he plays for,
in air quotes,
got bounced in the first round.
If I ever meet Ben Simmons,
I'm going to be nothing but polite.
Because he's seven feet tall.
Professional basketball player.
If I'm approached by Ben Simmons and I'm unarmed.
I will salute and walk on.
I'll be like, you're a hero, sir.
But on the internet, man, I'm tough.
Here, I want to show you a picture of what he looks like um oh i i'm looking on google images he's i'm showing up the audience wants to see as well
here because i want you to see his like outfit like this is what he's wearing on the bench now
outfit like this is what he's wearing on the bench now uh where is it it's the reggie miller quote the tweet he's dressed in purple and shit
dude it was hilarious to see him on the bench yeah zach found it that's how i like dress my
creative characters they were laughing i want to see if I can find it quickly.
I can't find it. Oh, I found it.
This is fucking hilarious.
Ben Simmons on
the bench. Zach, please show this as quick as
you can. He looked like
your character in Skyrim
during a cutscene. You know, like everyone's
normal and you're
like a bird or something like you don't believe it you don't fit in at all look at what he looks
like on the bench like which one of these things get one of them is riding the pine and the rest
are all players like he oh yeah he shows up to not play that looks ridiculous yeah like literally like when you get arrested and it pans to you in
gta level of outfit wow what happened my friend uh two things the internet and uh i had to restart
my pc four times after that to get like the mic and everything to connect we filled it with
basketball and a hockey talk. Oh. Creme de la creme.
While you weren't here, the cat's away, the mice play.
Oh, wow.
Well, now that Kyle's back, you guys want to wrap?
Yeah.
Yeah.
No, I feel bad that I ducked out there.
I was frustrated.
Kyle, we are consummate professionals.
Yeah, no, it's all good.
I could talk all day. I let him talk about hockey. It was frustrated. We are consummate professionals. Yeah, no, it's all good. I could talk all day.
I let him talk about hockey.
It was easy.
He guaranteed a Blues victory.
All right.
PKA 593.
I hope you guys enjoyed the show.
And check out our sponsors.
Yeah, and check out Hutch's thing.
And check out Hutch's thing.