Painkiller Already - PKA 624 W/ Jericho: Liver King Lied!, Crazy Kayne Canceled, Balenciaga Controversy
Episode Date: December 2, 2022...
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pka 624 start with just the boys tucker coming halfway through jericho taylor this episode of
pka brought to you by lock and load and blue chew a couple of wonderful products you'll hear more
about you're already fucking familiar everyone knows who they are so you'll hear more about them
again uh a little later how are you guys doing i'm pretty good oh what he's not good what's wrong no i'm good i'm good
i dude i just finished reading about kanye and it's you didn't watch the video yeah you had to
watch the video yeah yeah i i saw that well there's the video then there's all the analysis like
it's a long podcast to watch all of it but i didn't watch all the part where he said i like
hitler is probably the highlight right and the part right after that where he said, I like Hitler is probably the highlight. Right. And the part right after that,
where he goes on this little rant,
he's like,
Hey,
there's people everywhere.
And,
and those certain people want to tell you that there's not good in
everyone,
a little good in everyone.
Hitler,
for example,
because,
because there's a part where like,
like,
well,
Alex Jones is trying to save him.
Right.
He goes,
these people are trying to make it out like you like Hitler or something.
And he goes, well, hey, you know?
Literally, he gives it to him.
They're trying to make it like you like Hitler or something.
He goes, you know, I do like Hitler.
I like his roads and bridges program.
All right.
Amazing.
I like this and that. And it's like, dude, I'm glad you're wearing that mask.
Yeah, he's wearing like a gimp suit while he's doing this. Here like this and that. And it's like, dude, I'm glad you're wearing that mask.
Yeah. He's wearing like a gimp suit while he's doing this.
Here's my new theory.
It's one of two things.
Binary.
Uh,
here it's either Kanye is an actual Nazi or someone has kidnapped one of his
children or loved ones and they are holding him and they are making him say
that thing these things because that's the only way they get you on a stage saying this crazy
shit he's saying stuff that's like when he just randomly went i like hitler it's like whoa why
did you do that just now why did you just randomly pop off i like did you get a text from the
kidnappers of that says just randomly say uh i like hitler in the middle it's time to fulfill your
end of the bargain first of all stop calling me yay god damn it i hate that bullshit yes i will
say i like hitler just don't cut off another finger i've never i've never seen no it's like
like in my in my funny bit like they're making him change his name as well.
I see.
None of this craziness is on. Have you ever seen Alex Jones get so out Alex Jones?
No.
I've never seen that because like I've seen Alex Jones talk about Nazis and like his take.
He's like these Nazis, they were liberals, people.
They were leftist liberals.
They were socialists.
What are we?
We hate socialism. These they were socialists what are we we hate socialism
these nazis were socialists and he was like trying to tear kanye out of the nazi shit and the blase
attitude that kanye is just like actually hitler did you know he invented highways and microphones
and it's like the microphone i know the artist yeah the microphone i use as an artist and it's like, I know, I know the microphone I use as an artist.
And it's like, okay, I knew the Autobahn thing with Hitler.
Cause that's like a bar night trivia where it's like, did you,
who was in charge of the Autobahn? It's like, ah, we're going to get this.
It was fucking Hitler. I am so,
so sure he had nothing to do with microphones. Like there's no way.
I mean,
microphones like there's no way i mean what was he talking about engineer and also to say he invented highways i mean yeah like i i don't know i just like he put a highway in germany
now that i can buy sure sure but highways were not invented by like the romans maybe
or like when does a road become a highway i don't't know. If we start parsing this out,
then we'll end up right next to Kanye
defending Hitler, right?
So there's no...
If anyone's curious about how much Hitler
was involved in the Autobahn,
fucking Wikipedia that,
because we here at PKA refuse
to list any of the possibly,
according to Ye,
the things that were good about Hitler.
We will not list those
or even look into whether there are any things.
And of course, there's my dumb ass with it's like seeing politics and everything.
The Republican Judiciary Committee deleted their tweet.
It just said Kanye, Elon and Trump.
That was it.
That was the whole tweet.
And they're like, yeah, we got to get rid of this one.
These are no longer our heroes.
Well, I mean, is it like it should be like colon mental illness.
Right.
Right.
Yeah.
This December, the holidays are coming up.
Mental illness.
Check it.
Check on your loved ones.
Did you see that photo of Kanye?
He's like just sitting in some like Asian restaurant in like a strip mall after he like
barged out of the Tim Pool interview
apparently and it is so funny because there is like some woman there who's clearly a Kanye West
fan and she's like standing next to him smiling as he looks like miserable like he probably just
took his gimp mask off and like he it is her face just lets you know she's the last person to know what's going on with Kanye right now.
She saw Kanye in that restaurant and was like the guy with the shoes and the music.
Oh, my God.
I thought about you in a couple of years.
What's up?
Hey, are you still there to that beautiful Kim Karr?
Kim Karr.
What was it?
Yeah. it up hey are you still married to that beautiful kim car kim car what was it yeah like she's taking a picture with like chris pratt like it's the guardians of the galaxy
man like just no idea i want to talk about the gift mask i don't know does he feel
like a little secure and maybe like low level i don't know how to say it just plausible denial
there's not plausible deniability but
implausible deniability is built into him wearing that mask because he could always in the future
be like that's a deep fake that wasn't me look it just wasn't look it's not even my face they're
saying it that doesn't even sound like it i'll be honest i had to listen close to make sure it was
his voice because i was like if he's going off of the rails saying some hitler shit and i can't see
his face,
I'm not 100,000. They're great impersonators. Maybe that wasn't Kanye.
I've heard a couple theories. One of them is that
the plausible deniability is going to pretend that
wasn't him. Okay, that's one.
I've also heard that
he suffers from
really intense,
aggressive cold sores sometimes
and maybe he just flat out fucking wanted to hide that,
like,
you know,
didn't want to face the world.
And,
and then there's my own theory,
which is he just feels a little protected behind it.
And he's been exposed lately.
Does that make sense?
Yeah.
Projecting.
I felt like that with the mask a little bit.
Like,
I don't know.
Like I could just walk in like no one fucking knows me.
No one can see me.
I'm,
I'm hiding in plain sight. I'm sure he walked in with an entourage probably a camera but even if
not he is that guy being followed by security and and like hanger-ons with a mask on yeah i don't
know man he's crazed let me read this zach is posting a lot unhinged kanye wrote or said don't
embarrass yourself trying to chase your dreams.
Save face.
Save face.
That's why I got this effing mask on, because I ain't worried about saving face.
Fuck my face, he told the crowd during the concert.
Fuck whatever my face is supposed to mean and fuck whatever name Kanye is supposed to mean.
It's all about my dreams.
It ain't about anybody's dreams.
It's about creating, not about the idea of being a fucking celebrity. Those are older quotes about masks. I don't know. This man is unwell. Here's the thing. Is Kanye going off the rails because he left Kim or on a related note? Did Kim like keep him on rails all those years i don't know anything about their relationship
but from like the like all the like political minded people like surrounding him now he's like
i bet he's had he has a ton of people whispering in his ear to say certain things to to not do this
do that oh it'll be great for your cause to do to do this and say this but really it's someone
you know in milo or whoever
it is like trying to finagle something out of the russian term for useful idiot you guys are
gonna know this no i don't know no there's a russian term for useful idiot maybe zach can
help me but uh anyway it's this idea that like you know the the russian government their spy
network they they find someone who's easily compromised and get him to do shit i kind of feel like that's happening to kanye now kanye may be not as bright
as the people around him and fucking nick fuentes and milo and who knows who else are using him as
a tool and they'll just candace owens is she's still getting him to buy parlor is that that's so
that was like a week and a half ago and it's it's totally out like now
that's not even in the top five kanye things in the last couple months when someone like candace
owens comes up i've only been exposed to probably like the good sound bites and clips i'm sure
there's bad ones i need to see the bad ones because all i see is like really attractive
lady who makes a lot of sense and like defends herself so well. Oh, it's funny that you should characterize things that way, Senator, because and then
she'll start laying laying out this fucking case.
And it's like four parts to her explanation.
I'm like, there's no way she's not right.
I don't know.
I like I really haven't watched.
I haven't.
Is she one of the crazy ones, Woody?
Like, I don't know.
Like, is she like Kim Kardashian?
No, no, no, no.
Candace Owen.
I'm sorry.
I was looking up usefulity.
I got stuck on it.
No.
Well, Candace Owen, she used to be a Democrat.
I think she's a bit of a grifter.
Now she does the Republican thing.
She's changed her views because that's where the money is.
That's cool.
She has strong conservative beliefs, but they're always so thin.
She'll say, my opinion is climate change is fake.
And they're like, well, I mean, we've measured it.
What do you think about this?
Let's dive deep.
No, no, it just, that's as deep as it goes right there.
I'm not feeling it.
I'm not vibing with this climate change.
It's a yeah i'm not not vibing with this so it's a gut thing sears kind of a lightweight
but and this is my bias again every time republicans have a black supporter they hold
them up like they caught a fucking fish look this one likes us this one's on the republican team
it can be condé it can be canyon candace doesn't matter. Every time there's a black Republican, they put them out
front and center. Well, yeah.
They often do that. We want you to know
that we're not racist.
That we would love to have more black
people in the party. And one of the lies
I see from the left so much. We're so cool with
black people. Look what he says.
And we're still on.
Yeah. One of the lies I always see from the left
is when they show black guys with guns and they're like, this is the nightmare for the republicans and it's like no dude
we love seeing you guys with like ar-15s and shit it's like do you want to come with us and go
shooting yeah what kind of scope you got come on like like like it like i promise you if you want
to make if you're a black guy who who wants to secure a friendship with some white people
because it's good to have
black friends and white friends.
Friends outside your race, I should say.
Guns is a great way to do it.
Who's the black gun guy?
Be friends with me!
He's from YouTube. There's a black gun guy.
This guy is not paper thin.
Colin.
You just said that to get the fuck with me, right? A first name that could be right? And this guy is not paper thin. Colin. Colin? Is that his?
You just said that to get the fuck with me, right?
Like a first name that could be right?
There's a YouTuber who's pro-gun.
He's a Second Amendment guy.
It's like Colin Noir or something, right?
Oh, you might be right.
It is something like that.
I'm sorry.
I didn't want to be disrespectful because I wasn't positive about what his whole name was.
That's why I didn't let the whole thing out.
I didn't want to get the thing wrong.
Anyway, he's a Republican. And Republicans are all about him colin newar i'm sorry i i apologize but uh uh yeah that guy likes guns and he's exactly what you're talking about
he's he's fully in with the republican side they love him yeah sure like yeah there's the the idea
that like i don't know any white people who hate people
because of their skin color i've never met one i i like like maybe old ones who are just scum
right you know like like that old guy sitting in the corner at a fucking like mechanic shop or uh
you know like like uh the hardware store who's just like i hate them all and goes on these like
weird rants about stuff that's not even accurate or true
but like I've never met anyone who's
like my age group or even like
who's just like doesn't like
the race of black people
that's a new one for me
most people are actually pretty nice
like when you talk to them in real life
yeah what happens is you get
you get like upset at
like a person and then you boil him down
to like whatever the most hurtful like simple version of him can be you know it's xbox rules
and and some people mistake that for systemic racism that comes down from the top or something
it's like dude i would have called you any number of things based on what you were i just hate that you honked your
fucking horn i think that happens a lot right you know i'm sure kanye has a different kind of racism
though he's that hate racism that we need to single out because clearly he's talking about
hitler in a good fucking way i saw the edit of him like talking about hitler but it was
interspliced with clips from american history x when edward
norton's about to stomp that man and the kids going no don't do it that's like what alex jones
was doing right before he teed off on it where he's like don't do it kanye all his fans are
thinking too because you know there's still some fans who like, I wouldn't say I'm a fan of Kanye, but last week I was still under that, what I would say here, like, man, it's got to be mental illness, right?
It's got to be mental illness, right?
But now I'm starting to think it's mental illness and he's also a racist.
It's both.
I don't know of a mental illness that makes you praise Hitler.
Yeah, come on.
I mean, mental illnesses can make you do awful things.
Not that specifically.
There's no, ah, he's got Hitler disease.
Mental illness has made people kidnap hundreds of prostitutes and keep them in a basement.
He's got the Luftwaffe fever.
That's just horny.
That's just a guy who's horny.
At least he's not anti hoo-waffa fever that's just that's just a guy who's horny right at least he's not anti-semitic can you guys imagine like being in an interview and an easier softball than like
thoughts on hitler you're just like ayo not good ayo fire that back, bad guy Can you imagine Fucking that up
Kanye's gonna get really cancelled
Like
He already has been kinda
My dumbass thought he might come back
For a long time
People love his music, right
If you're talented enough
You can rape a person
They'll still listen to you
They'll still buy your songs
Kobe Bryant kept balling.
They paint him like an angel on fucking billboards.
Michael Jackson, we all know what was up.
Even if we don't think that he actually went all the way,
we know that something was not right several times with kids.
He cuddled up on some kids, and even that ain't right.
I don't like none of it.
But damn, he can sing, so it's all good.
Kevin Spacey, I'm good with bringing him back
100% into the fold.
If Kevin Spacey had a Kanye West-style meltdown
on Alex Jones just like this,
are you like, but you played him so,
but you played Frank Underwood.
And Kaiser Soce so well.
I guess we got to ask him.
Yeah, and American Beauty,
when you were attracted to that underage girl, man, you sold it well. I guess we got it. And American Beauty, when you were attracted to that underage girl.
Man, you sold it well.
It wasn't very hard to be attracted to an underage girl or boy.
Or whatever.
Or whatever kind of in-betweens they're doing these days.
He'd go into a whole weird transphobic thing, too.
He'd offend as many people as possible, probably.
Yeah. I hope he comes back. yeah you're right woody if you're talented enough like
some major stuff can like go under the rug if you can play ball you can like cripple human beings
and like hit hit like hitting the highways like like drunk driving over and over that john jones
shit you know there can be video of you beating your wife in a league
where they just had the stop beating your wife month or whatever.
And they'll be like, ah, the Steelers next week.
All right, two weeks from now, we're going to start your suspension,
and it's going to be a long, good one until you play the Seahawks,
of course, in week seven.
Going to need you back for that.
Going to need you back. Hope you I'm going to need you back.
Hope you've learned your lesson by next Monday. You've been in it for
a bye week and the game against
the Falcons.
They have suspended him from the
punt return team and it's like, he was never
on the punt.
For as long as you play the Lions, you're off this team.
He can't use the concession stands here no more.
Unless he's hungry.
He plays here.
Is it Chris Brown?
Did someone beat Rihanna or pee on a child or something?
That was R. Kelly.
Those are two different musical artists.
I got to say, there aren't a lot of white musical artists
that I hear about going off like this.
Maybe they're just sneaky.
They are sneaky. You're right.
Could be.
That's what it is.
Yeah, that's what it is.
I really think that's what it is.
Legitimately, yeah,
they're just sneaky. That's what it is.
But R. Kelly's done. You talk about the peeing on
people. I don't remember how many years
he got. Yeah, yeah. He's like done, done.
Everybody turned their back
on him
i saw like one of those youtube shorts where i don't know who it was like like a 50 year old
like rapper r&b guy or something but he was just like you know when he's your ninja he's your ninja
for life you know and maybe he does some stuff you don't like and and they're like yeah and people
are nodding along i mean then they get to this part and they're like wait maybe i don't nod at
this part you know maybe he does some shit you don't like so you know i wouldn't be down like that
you know i don't do no stuff like that but he's your ninja you know and they're and some of them
they're kind of like yeah but he did pee on all those little girls yeah he did
do uh enticing a child i see here exploitation of a child. 30. Oh, sexual exploitation
of a child. 30 years. He will
be eligible to get out
in 2049.
Oh, just in time for
the Super Bowl halftime show. He'll be
very old. Woody!
Yeah. Woody's been attacked.
He's been attacked. He's been cancelled.
Just a second.
For being okay with,
with Kanye.
Yeah,
this is interesting.
It's,
you know what I think?
I think that this Hitler stuff really hurts his chances of being elected
president.
I really think so too.
I really think so too.
Um,
I think that Trump is,
is,
is probably thinking like,
Oh yeah,
cause keep like careening into the,
the,
the side side rail there make sure you
don't steal any votes from me because god there's nobody on my team that's like voting for the black
guy who's literally saying i like hitler right like that there's no trump supporter who's that
right who would come on you know there are pro-nazi trump supporters not that would vote
for a black man oh oh yeah all right i'm sorry i didn't
those venn diagrams are two separate circles they look like boobies now we're amoebas
those don't touch at all um the people who support trump would vote for a man who supports hitler
who is black that doesn't exist no i mean maybe there's like i want
to meet that guy that guy's yeah i don't see color that's what it would be yeah he'd have to like
be okay i guess he would just have to be a full-on like anti-semite and that was his thing
he would have to love hitler yeah like just to be like all right fine you know i some on the internet
you never know if you're being trolled or if it's like the there's really this group of black nazis
but i i could have sworn that i saw some group of like black nazis like years back you know and i
thought it was some sort of internet oddity i didn't know if it was like a joke or satire or
if there was like eight,
eight black guys out there who identified with the Nazi party.
But I'm sure that those exist.
I'm sure.
I mean,
anything you can imagine,
there's a discord of people riled up about it.
It's fair.
Like any,
any intersection there's like,
there's a black Hebrew Israelites.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I can see,
I can see them being yay supporters.
A hundred percent. He called him out being yay supporters 100 he called him out he like
he shouted him out isn't that what kanye sort of like believes where he's like we i'm jewish
black people are the jewish people and so he would kind of be a black israelite i don't actually know
what they all believe but i mean black israelite seems like that yeah it's the same kind of thing
it's a look here's my thing i I think that Kanye is going to hurt himself,
and it's not going to be funny anymore,
and that's a shame.
When you say hurt yourself, is that code for suicide?
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, I think he's going to, yeah,
because I think that he's just really in a goddamn spiral,
and the spiral has been going for
like a year year and a half and it's like the stuff that would tear down a normal human being
plus the stuff that we can't even imagine like losing a billion dollars and being blasted and
across the entire planet by like by everyone like trending on twitter continuously about what a
dumbass piece of shit racist scumbag you are
and feeling because of your mental illness that like i don't know the zionists are conspiring
against you or whatever like i can see him hurting himself yeah it's a shame no i hope not i think
you're i really think he's mentally ill i think that like i think most people believe that by now
yeah jesus it seems like it's very erratic behavior for i mean i guess i
he's you know he's a history of like going off on things like he was known for that it's just he's
like gone from one to ten now he's always been eccentric you know like i just don't know much
about his past like i don't listen to his music i don't know really much about him up until this
when i hear his songs i like it like it's catchy it's good a lot of the reason people like college
college dropout albums really fucking good that came out like uh oh four maybe sometime around
there like so big we love that shit over i saw i saw this really old viral tweet do you remember
that uh that like reality show woman teela tequila oh 100 that was a fucking loon yeah i know everything
about she came out in favor of like or like empathetic to hitler and there's like a old
tweet from like 2013 somebody being like teela tequila straight up loving hitler come on not
even kanye would say that like using him as the example of like he probably just had went off on
taylor swift yeah oh yeah
around that time was when he went after taylor swift which now that seems pretty cute now doesn't
that is right yeah that seems pretty fucking tame no one seems on board with this idea that
first i won't talk about the juice
no one seems on board with this idea that losing kim is what set him off that's what i think it is
you know like like the cow mentioned he has all these pressures on him like normal people but
dude he lost they have kids together right and yeah kim and her whole family and like he's just
exiled from his social circle now and that must be brutal i am yeah i i don't know which you know
i think it might be a chicken
and egg situation there right because like maybe she left him because he's a mentally ill crazy
person or she probably wouldn't leave him because he was like doing so well yeah so i agree but i
think that whatever she left him because he was a five out of ten crazy and then he just finished
this finished the other five sure like you're right yeah it could be that like he's been wanting to go off for a while and then he was like well
like yeah buckle up everyone for a long time she's like honey you're being crazy and he's like oh am
i crazy all right thanks kim thanks for for pulling me back down to earth now without that
he's a helium balloon i bet this all started with a youtube rabbit hole too like like i bet this
started with a youtube rabbit hole in a late night and like mate and and and here we are like i think
i think that for real he watched some some of those youtube propaganda videos and he got convinced
and he didn't do any he didn't go on quora he didn't fucking like google is this for real
or anything like he didn't make a phone call to like.
Don't trust Quora.
I have so many burner accounts I'm creating.
One of my favorite hobbies is misinforming people.
Check Wikipedia.
Good God.
Anything.
Quora.
I got my new PC today, finally.
Nice.
I got it hooked up.
I got to play like, I don't know, an hour or something to kind of see what it would do.
That game is so demanding. It will run it at 144 hertz and keep it well above 144
99 of the time but it's not like it's blowing that game out of the water and like you could
i could play it in 4k and more than 60 frames or something have you tested out any other games just
to see how high quality you can get the graphics well the graph you know it the graphic settings are always there
you can you can set it with any system to really high it's just how many frames you'll get out of
it oh sorry i'm a retard not graphic the vision the overall video quality i imagine like you could
take those games you have fun and then you put plug it in again and you're like look at this now
it's as smooth as silk instead of like you know not yeah i can turn the flashes yeah i can turn
all the settings up to to ultra and get uh lots of frames now so but i haven't tried any other
games other than dark tide which looked amazing now that i could turn on all of the like fleshy
jibs and stuff when when i've been playing with nothing turned on in like a blank room and now
when you like hit a bad guy in the face like part of his face comes off and now you can see like his
skull behind it and he just it's pretty cool you like hit him in the face, part of his face comes off, and now you can see his skull behind it.
It's pretty cool. You hit him in the top
of the head, and his skull kind of crushes
in a little bit. It's lots of neat stuff
like that that I didn't have access to
before, I guess. Are the dark corners of
every map even darker?
Well, I've got... The darkness doesn't bother
me. I've got a really nice... Do the greys
pop?
Wait, is that a thing? Yeah! I've got like a really nice HDR. Do the greys pop? Wait, is that
a thing?
Yeah! I got a good HDR monitor.
We're powering through it.
Travel the world of 40k from the
spectrum of grey to charcoal.
I like it all dark and
evil and terrible. I think a jungle
map would be cool. I know you said that wasn't possible.
But there's a million planets, a billion planets.
A jungle map could have been possible.
Anything's possible in the 40K universe.
I watched some of that Luton guy's videos.
And like, honestly, I probably spent two hours watching like the different jobs ones.
Enthralled.
Really enthralled with it.
Like I was on Amazon just like two nights ago looking for like a physical book to read about the 40k universe.
But it's like the same problem of any big fantasy world where it's like there's not a canon to start with.
There's like a million people contributing to this.
And so like what is canon in the game might not be the same thing in these books.
And so I looked around like i stopped looking but i i'm
still gonna get back into it i want to find one that's like if they have like a thousand page
like tome of it i will read that because it's so interesting so i think what you might want
is like i'm gonna get the name wrong but there's something i know there's this there are books that
are called like the guardsman the imperial guardsman's compendium or something like that and it's not a narrative
tale it's more like the the silmarillion and that it's like guardsman it's they'll be like a list of
prayers and then there'll be like lists of like how their guns work and like how their ammunition
works and like it's like a guardsman's actual manual to some extent but um i like the audio
books and i i just sort of pick and choose around.
And you're right about the lore.
They're being no canon because it would be great to just.
All right.
Look, the Marvel Universe.
Let's start with Iron Man and work all the way through Infinity War.
And you can't really do that here because the lore, like the greater story that stretches those 40,000 years.
like the greater story that stretches those 40,000 years.
I only know like the bits and pieces from like,
because it's pulled from so many sources and they condensed by somebody like looting into those,
you know,
those YouTube videos,
because I'm not going to read a hundred books.
You know how the,
it's like this,
you know,
on the Bible,
like each of the books,
it's the different apostles have like a different spin on what went
down like one of them will focus a lot more on how christ like i don't know blessed the guy but
one of them is a lot more focused on why he was blessing the guy sure than the how um it's it's a
little bit like that so so you're you're pulling from different sources about the same events and
so even the existence of the emperor and his background
and where he came from, that's not nailed down.
I have what I believe based on all the sources I've looked into.
It makes the world cooler.
I like that about the world.
I like the lore too, yeah.
It's the nerdiest thing I like.
It is so deep.
If I wasn't into three other things, this would be the nerdiest thing i like and it is so deep if i wasn't into like three
other things this would be the nerdiest thing henry cavill henry cavill is super into this
shit um he's the figuring kind of guy though not even the video games right all of it all of it
he's um he's all he's on fucking reddit like like you can see they're like we know you're here kenry keep fighting for us um and i've seen him questioned in uh in interviews about like oh which 40k army do
you think is the best and he's like with his british accent that always takes me off guard
like oh well there's this and that and that and the other and he's like he knows so much about it
it's shocking because it's so nerdy it's it's the height of nerdiness it really
like it would be like him like breaking down uh like pokemon types yeah like like high end like
like oh see at the higher levels that's just not gonna cut it you're vulnerable to plant type yeah
i mean like it is jarring to see someone who looks like he does be into something like that.
You know what I mean?
It's almost odd because he's a superstar.
He's the people's fucking champion.
That's got to be awesome to be into something that much
as a millionaire actor and just telling your agent,
like, I want to be a space marine.
And they're like, well, you can play this.
There's a lonely dog's owner who escaped.
Space marine!
Insist on your projects.
And then it's like, what am I going to do with my free time?
Oh, I'm going to get into this hobby that I can afford anything of.
I'm going to have a billion figurines and paint all of them.
The only thing I know about the figurine games, I've never played one.
But I did watch like a 40 minute uh video of this guy and he had like
a giant table in his basement and it looks like a like a a bunker it had every wall from from feet
to head is just like oh do you need wood elves oh but you need wood elves who are you wearing this
kind of armor to indicate that they are from this specific planet.
Okay, well, actually two rows down from that, not the standard wood elves.
Get the ones that the darker elves.
Yeah, because they're actually from the boogie planet and then not the mia mia planet.
Is no one going to call out Taylor and acting like he doesn't?
You're muted.
We lost you.
We lost you.
He's back. I i hope change my mic
yeah taylor you have figurine money i know you do i i just don't want to get into it
no no please don't get into it like like like that's where i draw the line on the
troll that would be the dream but if only i were henry cavill bro but see but like i'm saying if if this is your brand of nerd
that's a dream like me i like like magic the gathering so that would be my my thing if i
was a multi-millionaire i'd be buying fucking four of every every card i'd go there with a
posse and flex on all the middle schoolers at every Friday Night Magic. Play them, and if I lose, it's because I'm a generous guy
just trying to help.
I'm trying to get people into the habit.
There are rich guys who play poker like that.
They play at the highest levels of poker,
and they're clearly not the best guy at the table,
but they're such a wild card that they're kind of bonkers to deal with.
They'll make really wild decisions that aren that they're kind of bonkers to deal with um they'll make really wild
decisions that aren't based on anything i hate that i don't understand why the ones at these
tables love that they're there well all right so if you're playing like a long game um then
that variant is going to even out it doesn't matter if you lose $2 million tonight to that millionaire.
Play him every week, and we're going to take him, right?
Just because you're better at the game,
and it's going to average out in your favor.
Okay.
But people who don't like people that play like that
are playing Thursday night poker with their buddies.
And why are you ruining the game for everyone with your silly play?
If you don't value the chips in front of you enough to not
throw them around willy-nilly, then we
need to raise the stakes. That's always the answer
to that. If someone is playing like that,
raise the stakes. You're ruining our
friendly game. All right, then it's $100
a chip. Do you still want to throw them in there?
Probably not.
This is going to be the answer for most people.
I can see how that's a solution when people have uh similar levels of income right like you know what you might
like you have friends that can't raise the stakes to make you nervous right you're just in a
different income bracket i mean you know like what they'll often do is is they won't say hey let's
play a few hands um $100 and $200
blinds. They'll say, here's the deal.
We're going to play 5,000
hands of $5,100.
We have the option to
buy back here, there, and there for these
amounts, and they'll lay out a rule set.
You'll basically sign a bout
agreement. You can no more
walk away with your money than a fighter can go
in the first round, get a few good punches in and then got him i'm out i'm ahead of the scorecards off i go it's time
for round two and this guy's a wrestler let's go wait what is that called when you're locked in
you can't leave well i'm just saying like like if you're going to play challenge another person to
like heads up or something or that's how it would work how common is that because that's always what i wondered with gambling i thought like you could stand up anytime
but well with gambling it is but if you're if you're like um um doug polk for example when he
had that that challenge against daniel negron you they that they had a similar rule set to what i
laid out i don't remember the exact but but they were going to play like 100,000 hands and 5,000 were going to be live and 95,000 were going to be in person.
And so that way it controls the variance and the idea is that the better player
is going to come out on top because we play enough hands to let the cream rise,
essentially.
Okay, fair enough.
But it's not like you're going to a casino.
It's not like you're ever going to go into a casino and they're going to be like, sign the agreement.
Now sit.
Like cock the gun behind you.
Like, no, you win.
You stand up. You leave. It's a casino.
You're playing against the house.
Welcome to Zicane West Casino.
Gambling is one of those things
I'm so glad i don't like
like i just i'm not that interested in it i've i like will talk to my friends about like betting
on sports and i'm around them because a lot of them really enjoy like sports betting and i'll
be like man it seems like they're having a great time like betting on sports and i'll be like maybe
i'll download it and that and then it's like I don't actually want to. I have no confidence in my picks.
But Kyle has dominated me the last five years on NHL playoff picks
just by picking the opposite of me.
Kyle would be up bigly if he would have bet on everything I've told him not to
over the last three years with the NHL playoffs,
and it wouldn't even be close.
So there's no way.
I would have won a lot of office pools on that one year
when I picked against you.
Because you picked the one seeds or whatever.
They all lost.
Like 80% of them went the other way.
It's crazy.
Hockey's known for that.
It's definitely a skilled game,
but there's just a lot of luck in hockey.
Taylor goes at puck luck,
but so many of the goals come off deflections or ricochets,
and it just leads to the second best team winning sometimes.
One of the players on the Tampa Bay Lightning
is called Pat Maroon,
and he's a heavy guy, a big guy,
and his nickname used to be Fat Maroon
because his own tagline, he'd get called out by media,
like, you're kind of fat, man,
and he'd be like, I'm chubby but effective.
And because he's like 6'4", big guy, and'm chubby, but effective. And like, because his job, his, his, he's like six,
four big guy.
And he would just move people around,
stand in front of the net,
cause problems.
And like,
I didn't listen to the clip,
but like some announcers getting in trouble,
apparently because like,
he just kept going on and on about how fat Pat Maroon was during the game.
Like,
look at him.
They're not catching up.
And like Pat Maroon, like made a post, made a post like honestly like like you listen to it i'm not even on the ice and so he like started some
like you know you can call me fat or whatever i'm not that sensitive but let's do a little charity
like everybody's paying attention to me like anti-bullying charity and i thought that was
really really neat of him like obviously it's not going to hurt his feelings he won the stanley cup three years in a row how many players can say
that but jesus yeah big rig maroon he won with the st louis blues he's from st louis hometown hero
three in a row well only one with the blues and then he went to a better team but he knows how
to pick his teams like if you could just do that every year you could be the greatest of all time
right yeah he would have won four in a row if colorado would have lost you got just do that every year, you could be the greatest of all time, right? Yeah, he would have won four in a row if Colorado would have lost.
You got to have that Nancy Pelosi look.
You have to do that.
Yep, the genetic lottery of big tits.
Wait, what are we talking about?
Her ability to really score good on a pick-em.
Yeah.
Her stock luck.
Hillary Clinton, I guess.
Hillary Clinton was the luckiest one I can recall.
I don't know pelosi's picks
but clinton losers i can't think of one i wouldn't make i think pelosi had been called
out for having those similar to hillary numbers and then like very recently there was a big loss
and it was like the first one ever i could be wrong but i almost personally i'm almost positive
i read that hillary got like a 10 banger like she bet on cattle futures and hillary clinton
you know renowned cattle expert yeah uh she put 10 grand in and then like bet that they'd go up
and then bet again they'd go down and then bet again they'd go up and she just timing what's happening it's like hillary why are you so good at cows it's like you know that's what i do
that's how i turned 150 000 a year into billions it'd be easy to figure out how she knew though
right like figure out what's causing the the particular swings that she takes advantage of was it something about the price of food a cattle feed or was it or was it fuel you know it's one of
those factors that there's only so many that i mean it's probably a factor that was impacted by
legislation they were poised to pass like before people knew about it right so they would like get
a jump on things probably all guessing yeah you know you would imagine something like that and yeah i you know something about about the the cattle futures my guess was
that she knew someone who had inside information and just follow that advice oh yeah i doubt she's
doing any any like not that she was like i'm about to do shit to fuel and then fuel is going to make
this happen oh no no no no i wasn't even suggesting that i was saying that like whoever is telling her they are they're like yeah well
we're about to do that thing with iran and that's going to affect the price of fuel which will do
this and at the same time you know that thing with the corn subsidies not going to go through
like they know that stuff that it's going to happen maybe even at a state and federal level
and they're able to take advantage of it.
While we're talking politics, and I'm happy as can be, Trump announced he was running for president.
And then at least in my universe, and by the way, that includes a lot of Fox News.
It's a dead story.
No one's talking about Trump.
I agree.
Yeah, Kanye is the bigger story right now.
I agree.
I think Trump needs to uh to get out
there and do some stuff i need to see him um you know at some rallies like like like like coming up
with some some fucking bangers it needs to get better insults he needs some stuff that gets
replayed like like i don't want to hear like oh and the economy will be better and and look the
term limit stuff i don't know who whispered that in his ear, but that's smart.
He should go back and forth with Kanye.
Just call him Crazy Kanye, go for that,
and just start beating that drum to disassociate himself from Kanye.
He'd call him Kooky Kanye.
Better.
Then you get three Ks.
Kooky Kanye.
Or as they call him
around here.
We call him the KKK, don't we, folks?
That's what we call him.
That's what we call him.
Great music, though.
He comes out to like a Kanye song and he's like, say what you will about him.
This is a banger.
He's doing his Trump dance where he just kind of moves his hands.
Have you seen the compilations of the trump dance it's just i know the trump dance the little
weeble wobble thing if he did that with any less confidence it would be mockable yeah but he's out
there just vibing like an old man everybody loves him i've seen a compilation of him like
hugging and kind of get like sexual assaulting the united united states flag and uh yeah i'm
like you know this this kind of works actually i've seen him president i've seen him kiss the
american flag and tell the flag that he loves this this is terrible
fending off those invisible demons
what was the new
like he changed maga
like make america great again
again or something
like it was like magaga or magagal
did you guys not see that
it didn't last long it was stupid
no it'd still be Maga.
No, there's two more letters.
It was Maga and then
it ended with, I think it had an
RA or something. Shit, or another GA.
Make America great and glorious again. That's what it was.
Make America great and glorious again.
And it was like Magaga.
Magaga.
Make America marginally better than it is currently
i can't wait to see uh don't we have a hundred dollars bet i forget the nature of the is it
ten have i if i made it oh no no i'm not reacting to i don't so i don't know the amount and i don't
know the terms um but but we're far from. I think that I picked Trump against the field probably to be the president,
but I don't know if our bet was just to win the nomination for the party.
But I'm sure it's written down somewhere or recorded.
Zach says two bets, nomination and then double or nothing.
The nomination and the presidency.
Okay, I'm feeling good about both of those.
I don't think Trump's going to make any noise in this,
but we'll see.
Yeah, we'll see.
Yeah, it's a while.
I think he'll probably...
Wait, is he...
Who's more popular, DeSantis or Trump?
Trump, I think.
Is Trump still...
Because I saw the polls from quite a while ago,
and it was like DeSantis was catching up for a while,
and then he fell off big,
and Trump was bigger,
but that could have changed.
It also depends on where. Like DeSantis is more popular in a while, and then he fell off big, and Trump was bigger, but that could have changed. It also depends on where.
Like, DeSantis is more popular in Florida, and he's more.
We lost you again, Woody.
Yeah, something with your mic.
He's more popular in Florida.
Well, DeSantis won his election,
and it was a landslide where everyone voted down the ticket on his side.
And so that looks great for DeSantis in Florida,
but not in a national race per se because Trump wins Florida easy.
He lives there.
It's his state.
DeSantis wins Florida easy.
But if they run against each other, I think Trump wins it.
Oh, I don't think so.
I think DeSantis mops the floor with Trump in Florida,
but,
but I don't think it matters.
Um,
because what I,
what I,
what I meant to say was I think he wins Florida anyway.
So like if you,
if you're the Republican party,
you're like,
who's our better bet.
Then they're like,
Oh,
well,
DeSantis certainly brings Florida home.
It's like,
yeah,
Trump's got Florida wrapped up too.
Who,
who's getting Ohio.
Yeah.
Trump's a red,
I'm sorry,
not Trump. Uh, Florida is a red state. We's getting Ohio knocked out? Yeah, Trump's a red – I'm sorry, not Trump.
Florida's a red state.
We're not worried about who takes Alabama, who takes Florida.
Talk to me about the Southwest.
Talk to me about Georgia.
Talk about North Carolina and Ohio and some of those Rust Belt states.
Can we get Michigan again?
For the nomination, though, Florida will matter, I think.
It really did last time.
If I recall correctly, this is two times ago actually,
matter i think it really did last time i if i recall correctly this is two times ago actually florida was meant to help either jeb or rubio like that was the deal florida was positioned
in such a way that like they were supposed to lock in their nomination then no one thought
trump was going to win florida and then he did um but this time around i think desantis beats
him in florida if florida is crucial like that and i think desantis beats him in iowa but it's so early who knows yeah yeah yeah i think kyle's
right with like trump's definitely more popular than desantis and like ohio like among republicans
there i would imagine for sure right yeah he beats him in a national race i think yeah he just he just has more support is it years from
now really what are the years it's yeah a little from now i'm looking forward to it what i really
want to see is joe biden on a stage like like i i like to see him uh you know do his thing
as best he can and uh yeah see him go out there and give the he'll get memed again he'll get
memed so hard.
Next time he's like, you know,
if you really want to make something happen,
first thing,
there's probably like two things.
What was I going to say?
There's multiple things.
There's multiple things we got to...
And he'll do one of those,
and it'll mean, and it'll really hurt his chances.
Boom, boom.
He's going, he made a boom, boom.
Boom, boom.
His wife comes at him.
She's like, that's right, boom, boom.
We're going to knock them right out.
And the people in the basement of the White House,
they don't have any snacks.
There's no snacks.
No, no.
She's like, yeah, Donald Trump's a real stinker.
It's just her holding it together this whole time.
They've been injecting him with amphetamines and pushing him out on stage.
And that's the best you get.
I saw a short yesterday and this Asian guy, he was like, Grandpa, do your Joe Biden impression.
And Grandpa was very old Asian man.
He just goes.
do your joe biden impression and grandpa was very old asian man he just goes and everybody's dying laughing that's a pretty good joe biden impression the ones where he's
like looking for somebody's hands to shake seemingly that's not there or just like doesn't
know where to go look i when you're on a stage like you get turned around if you're not familiar with
that stage i get that but like time and time again they tell you before you go up there sir okay sir
you'll do this it says it on his paper you know like they're babying you so much at that higher
level at the bottom of the paper it says you know say god bless america shake the guy to your left
hands his name's tom he's got two kids jack jackie and jill and fucking like walk behind him he'll lead you to me i'm wearing red
your kids jack and jill is child abuse is it with that i think so they're gonna get so many
name they're gonna get some pale of water jokes i I'm pretty sure. I would name my voice Hans and Franz, like the
skit from SNL.
No one's going to get it.
Yeah, but I get it.
In the 80s, you still...
It's a lifelong joke for me.
And I'd
make them put
on that performance for me. I'm Hans
and I'm Franz and we're here to pop
you up
like the whole thing. As I picture
this, Kyle, there's two children chained to a
basement radiator and you're standing
there wearing muscles.
Is that real? I wonder
after I know
there's no this isn't real. You do not sniff
Caitlin Collins hair.
I'm sorry. I didn't read carefully enough
at the very bottom, it tells him
what his wife's name is. He knows his wife's name.
He knows his wife's name.
I used to.
I know I love her very much.
That's so sad.
My GPU came today
but either it didn't solve the problem
or I've got some more fixing to do I don't know
I gave it a good go it's installed
what problem were you having
the heavy boy eh
yeah so the
symptoms were over time my computer was
crashing okay and then
it couldn't render things in game well.
Like, I was getting weird graphical glitches covering the screen, which it's a beta, so I didn't know.
And then I had, like, frame rate drops, and the game kept crashing.
I was like, all right, you know, but it's a beta.
I don't know.
And then it wouldn't boot anymore.
And I'm like, you know, every one of these things is checking the box for a bad GPU.
I'll get a new one.
And I think my current i don't
know any there's only so many things in that box yeah maybe there's enough electricity
it could be the psu i mean it's not unheard of
not in this instance like like though yeah but it's this is something that the screen's blinking
at me and stuff like i i monitor well i have three monitors and they're all fucky so they're
all blinking yeah but in different ways like the middle one blinks windows the two side ones blink
like solid green solid red solid white and they're just they fuck with you when you're peripheral
when you're trying to solve the problem it's like as if debugging pc that won't boot isn't like unhappy enough i have like
green and yellow and red just flashing at me trying and i'm like this you're getting clockworked
orange by your own computer yes i it makes me so unhappy just weird this problem out. I worked on it for hours today.
I wish I knew
shit about fuck when it comes to
these things, but I have no
advice at all. I got my
PC today. It was supposed to get here yesterday
and I was so mad at
iBuyPower because I
paid for that very expensive overnight shipping.
It was supposed to be here yesterday.
It turned out that
they have the only form on their
website where you can put your address
in incorrectly.
And it'll just auto-fill.
I do that auto-fill thing.
You were real excited.
I didn't put my fucking street number in.
It just accepted
Smith Road
and no address.
And they shipped a $4,000 PC to Smith Road.
And look, I get maybe I should have put in fucking 157 Smith Road,
but God, nobody caught that.
I certainly didn't.
One of us has to be on the ball here, and it ain't going to be me.
So you put in the correct street name, Smith-Roses to Hypothetical,
but not the number.
So then FedEx calls me.
That's an important part of the address.
FedEx calls me this morning, like first thing,
and leaves a voicemail because my phone's silent, of course.
And it basically says, hey, got your package here.
We want to get it out to you.
We just need your address.
And so I call them back, and I'm i'm like oh great uh here's my address and they're like uh we can't change that
the the shipper has to change that because it's you know and i'm like oh well but i'm right here
you know i've got all the fucking information imaginable i know what it says on the side of
that box too like like everything not good enough and i'm like fuck so now i'm on the side of that box too, like everything. Not good enough. And I'm like, fuck.
So now I'm on the phone with iBuyPower.
They won't change it.
They can't.
It's a change order to add my house number to it.
And they're like, all we can do is cancel the order.
And I'm like, you know what?
Yeah, cancel it.
Like, wait, are you sure?
I'm like, yep, yep, yep.
Y'all don't want to do business?
I don't either.
Let's cancel it.
You know, as long as I get't either. Let's cancel it.
As long as I get a full refund,
I'm done.
They're like, okay.
They cancel it.
Then my phone rings the second after they hang up.
Hey, it's FedEx.
Did you call us?
I'm like, yeah.
Kind of a sad story.
I told them I was supposed to get it today. I really wanted to, but I guess it's not going to happen.
They're like, oh, no. What's your I was supposed to get it today. I really wanted to, but I guess it's not going to happen. And he's like, oh, no.
What's your address?
I'll bring it over.
And I'm like, 157 Smith Street.
I'm like, I'm on the way.
I'm like, did I call I Buy Power and let them know they shouldn't give me my money back?
So I called him back and let him know that it's on the way to my house just so
you know so you're gonna want to like not cancel that order and uh and they're like yes this is
acceptable to us and so that's kind of how it went down so i i don't like i buy power because
they're like clearly too big of a company to like care about your order at all like enough to bend
a rule or put an address in for you which is is... I like what just happened there. Kyle's like,
should I call iBuyPower
and tell them that they should still bill me?
And Taylor's like,
no, spoken like a man with no felonies yet.
Yep.
Oh, you want a little wire fraud, do you?
Oh, big boy.
You know where they send you?
It's a crime.
They want to sue you up for a $4,500 wire fraud, Taylor?
That's probably not worth it.
To a media security federal prison.
You'd be fighting over tater chips.
Yeah, so I let them know.
But no, I got a white PC this time.
The last one was called Black Beauty.
And so this is a really powerful PC, so I figured I would name this one the white PC.
And so that's what I named it.
And so it's right next to the black one.
And they're getting along well so far.
No issues.
But this one is clearly like flexing on the old one.
It's just better in every way.
Of course, that's the way electronics go.
You always look at the old one and you're like, how was I ever with you?
I'm not even using it right now. I sort of like have them uh set up over there and i'm using the old one and i can just like switch over like like um by pulling the
cord i'm just gonna play games on there i don't want anything else on that thing i think it's
really fun to finally be able to max that game out i'm looking forward like you said to trying
out some other games and seeing what it'll do. What are other good
ones? What's a good game to
push to the limit
with it? Oh, I don't know about that, but
Tarkov is very demanding.
CPU-wise,
especially, and I'm sure GPU-wise
as well, but it's often... I was
personally bottlenecked by my CPU
last I played it, and this is
a much, much, much better CPU.
It's three or four generations ahead.
It was so funny. My last one,
when you start up Darktide,
it's like, how many threads do you want to
utilize, which is how many cores from your CPU?
And it's like, we recommend
eight. And I'm like, yeah, okay.
Eight sounds like a lot.
I logged in with this thing, and they're like, we're thinking
28, maybe 30. I'm like, I didn't know i had so many cores amazing uh so it's um it's it's a lot more
fun to be glad you're liking it man yeah yeah it's a it's an expensive toy for more frames
per second but i guess uh yeah but now sieve sieve's gonna look real good you play that baby at 900 frames per second thousands of frames
anything that's got lots oh and i wanted to talk about fucking dark tide quickly like like because
the full game released and it's a real disappointment it's a real disappointment
um the beta was about oh i love the game but it's
not and i love playing the game but but it's uh it's an early access game that's that's been sold
they prioritized an in-game store over over keeping their promises um to have 70 weapons on release
and and along with the classes there's uh there's bugs that ruin certain perks and classes and traits and such that haven't been tended to.
The optimization is awful.
It crashes a ton for a lot of people.
Obviously, I've fixed those issues with a very expensive PC, but not everybody can do that.
And worst of all, this is the scummiest thing.
Maybe it's changed since this afternoon but they
promised it was going to be a day one um um release on the uh what's the thing xbox has where
you get the game um game pass the game pass or whatever but uh but it's not on there and that's
what they're referring to as cross play by the way if you bought the guy the thing on the game pass
on pc because this game is not on xbox and if they ever get to thing on the Game Pass on PC,
because this game is not on Xbox,
and if they ever get to run on the Xbox, I'll be surprised.
There's so many Xbox guys on their subreddit being like,
hey, I can't find it on the Game Pass.
Where's it at, guys? Do you have to go through a folder?
And they're like, oh, you poor little man.
Were you thinking today was the day
that you would be able to play the game with us?
No, no, no, no, no.
No.
That's shitty.
They say someday, soon, you'll be able to play with us.
Isn't the Xbox like the most power, like this new Xbox, like the most powerful console ever by a lot?
Yeah.
And it can't handle it.
Well, I don't know if it can't handle it or if they just haven't gotten around
to getting that all sorted.
But they promised that it would be
right after the PC version.
That's another lie if it's not on there.
But it not being on the pass for PC users
is nonsense.
And they said that for some reason,
if you bought the game on Game Pass,
utilizing that, being able to get it for free,
that's cross-platform play, they saying to play with steam pc players even though you're both on pc and that doesn't work they're saying i've read that that doesn't work that that the pc players
the steam players can't play with or the pc players on steam can't play with the ones who
bought it on game pass which is a huge fuck up as well if that's true and um and uh it's the whole thing's
a bit disappointing that uh i don't know push it back more because it's still clearly not done
the the worst part i think is that they've got that like that monetization's just right in there
right off the bat working perfectly like it's like oh you can go right over here right away and you can like spend your real money and buy coins and of course the coins
don't aren't spent in round um yeah numbers so you always have to buy more because you've got
leftover coins bullshit meanwhile you they don't have the full features in the game like the
crafting you can't craft weapons still they don't have their weapon features in the game. The crafting, you can't craft weapons still. They don't have their weapon crafting
in. There's still no leaderboard.
It's real annoying. I bought the
expensive version of the game, which was only $60,
I think, but it came with 3,000
coins. So I'm like, oh,
I'm going to come into this game rich.
3,000 coins is fuck
all coins. That's like,
I suck, and I can earn that
many coins in 40 minutes maybe go ahead kyle
am i wrong do i have this off work so there's like four kinds of currency in the game so
you could be off or on at the same time but i didn't pay too much attention to it i had a lot
of like the coin you get from missions that you use to buy weapons in that store i had a lot of
that coin so that while they did give me a boost of it
that seemed significant, I didn't
really notice how much. I think the coins
that you might get are the coins you spend
in that cosmetic store
that are
comparable to real money, that you have to buy
them with real money. I think you get...
There's two types of coins.
That's like $20. I think it's like a
$10 or $20 value
if it's 3,000 or 20 value of that that
that uh if it's 3 000 coins in that store maybe maybe yeah um but you can go in there and you can
buy like some really cool gear um the the stuff that you earn to wear by doing hard things in the
game pales in comparison to what 15 will get you i've got you. I've got a golden skull mask
and fucking like my character
has got huge shoulder pads
with scrolls rolling off of her everywhere.
Yeah, it's awesome.
So I love the low price of $15.
Yeah, I love the game.
And it's like I've been psyched about it forever.
And it's like, oh, it doesn't run well.
Well, we need a new PC.
But Kyle's about 4100
yeah and there's no leaderboard and some of the maps don't work apparently yeah they added three
maps the difference between here's the thing the difference between the beta like the early access
beta and the full release is three maps and i don't remember what else that's not a good sign no and all those
seemingly little things they could have fixed aren't fixed really disappointing yeah very
disappointing after being delayed like almost a year to just not fucking get it together in time
for for release yeah i i um i don't know i don't know if you blame the the
developers or uh it's really frustrating when they've got like their mouthpiece who's like
their representative who's just outright lying for them um his job must suck because they're
hitting him with like screenshots they're like dude you said this and now it's that like is he getting like 402 yeah yeah yeah yeah for sure i never
40402 was that a 420 reference no he was the original community manager wasn't he for college
yeah but how do you choose his name significance of 402 is i always assumed i thought it was like
like an la area code or something like that that maybe meant something to other people but not to me.
Yeah, he basically got roasted.
The Call of Duty community managers would be
able to weather the Vermintide storm like it
was a drizzle, I would imagine, just based on how big
the games were. Those guys got harassed so bad
the call of duty guys and they like they never or what i remember with like jd 2020 and 402 is
they would like not do the thing that like some community managers do now which is like
sorry everyone this is the situation we apologize for the delay and that's all we can say for now back then they'd
be like responding to individuals like i know you're upset i'm sorry about this and they're
like so you do admit there's a problem like doing that kind of shit yeah then what are you
apologizing for yeah if you didn't do anything i don't apologize we got him boys we thought we
made him think apologizing was a good faith measure.
No, it was an admission of guilt.
Now he knows we hate him.
It was so fucking toxic.
So all of that stuff I said is very disappointing.
I'm sure in time some of it will be addressed,
but I would hold off on buying it.
If you don't have a cutting-edge PC
or you care about any of that
stuff i mentioned that's just not in the game it's still an early access game and i'm okay with
that but i doubt you shouldn't be yeah needing a cutting edge pc to even play it marginally is
bullshit that's that's ridiculous i don't know why it's so far behind schedule because they
delayed it by a year.
I've been on software projects and I swear half of it gets written in the last month.
And I think that that's what happened.
They're like, oh, it's not fucking done.
All right. You have 12 more months.
I'm here in 11 months vacation.
Yeah.
Another month to get it done.
Let me give them credit for one thing, though.
Another month to get it done.
Oh, let me give them credit for one thing, though.
Everyone, a big complaint from the beta players early on,
the earliest versions of the beta,
was that the weapons didn't have very detailed statistics for them.
They just had this generic number assigned to them.
Along with their rarity, they just had a number that's 250, 327.
Nobody knew what that fucking meant and they were like ah well that number is uh being divvied up into those yellow bars those yellow bars need
numbers on them and i need to know exactly what each one of those bars represent and they're like
why it's like dude do you like like the mod that i used to play on vermitide showed me
such nitty-gritty stuff down to decimal points repeating and so like like they did that
so now when you inspect a weapon it breaks down like how much damage it does to every uh enemy in
the game on the various difficulties all of its weapon combos what it's good at how those numbers
are being integrated into various um traits of that weapon and uh and then explaining what those traits are imagine that they
and they did all of that in the last month or two but you i can see little things where like
there's an ability in the game where it's like hey would you like a second charge of your power
it's like yeah i would it's clear that initially it was three charges because the visual for that
the little whatever you call it has three little dots instead of two.
And they just haven't gone back to fix that because either they don't know or they're working so hard that they haven't gotten to it.
I don't fucking know.
It's frustrating, though.
Probably the people that can fix the code and the people that can fix the artwork are different people.
I would think so.
So, like, what's the artwork guy doing today yeah right now i mean it's he's in oslo right now asleep but but you know like when he
wakes up in a few hours what's he gonna fucking do not add a score card not add a make a map you
know not make a map certainly no jungle maps, apparently. Any pussy who gets bit butthurt over a goddamn scoreboard
and doesn't see that as motivation to improve yourself
shouldn't be playing a goddamn video game.
You need a fantasy fantasy world.
The fantasy world that the rest of us normies go to
was too fucking hard for you.
So you need a fantasy inside of that fantasy world
where the made-up numbers don't even
matter every time you get a kill there's like a vo that's like wow like oh nice great you're the
best you know this game is appealing to me i want compliments with every kill call of affirmations
over here all of affirmations and and the game is too hard. I want it to be sort of a field where I just take down flowers.
Yeah, I want the game to be
brutally difficult if I want it to be
and I want it to make me feel bad because I am bad
and then I want to try hard and improve.
With every kill I should get compliments and rainbows sprouting from
the dead flower.
People won't like that though.
People want brutality. They want to see how many
specials they killed. We don't have to talk about
the scorecard yet because we've all gone off on the scorecard.
We've used it so many times. Well, it's not just
this game and it's not just scorecard.
It's like all games. I think Battlefield
2042 did something similar where they
did something funky to the scoreboard to appease
the people who play a
45-minute game of Battlefield and don't
actually get anything done.
How do you
play a whole game? I mean mean that's how i would play battlefield
like i played once at a friend's house like whatever one came out in like 2006
and it was just first thing i noticed is the dude breathes like i would breathe
this guy must have skipped cardio and then like futzed his way through boot camp because the guy used to go
and you could hear the
clunk and I remember the movement of the
guy running and all I did was just like run
up to a building and get blown up
by an IED and then teleport
300 yards away and then huff and puff
to my next death. That game sucks.
Never got into Battlefield. It's better if you
play it. It's not because I was bad.
No. There must be another explanation. It's not because I was bad. No. There must be another explanation.
It's because I'm too good for it.
That's exactly what I mean.
So many games I've been too good for.
It's because my talents are better utilized elsewhere.
That's why.
Liver King.
Liver King has been busted.
Good call.
If people don't know who the liver king is,
he is one of the most influential influencers,
I would say.
Like when I think of fitness influencers,
there's not many bigger than the liver king.
Yeah.
And he purports to live this lifestyle
where he like eats only meat
and he sells his supplements
and basically says,
if you work out,
buy my shit,
you can look like me. This possible i'm all natural and if anybody looking at this guy with half a brain cell
knows he's not natural knows that he's on performance enhancing drugs but he maintains
that he's not and of course everyone takes this what about the children like of course i'm not
stupid enough to believe it but kids are kids will your supplements. I've been hearing that a lot.
This is this guy.
One, those are ab implants.
That's what his liver looks like now.
Are you sure they're ab implants?
The internet said they are.
Derek says they're ab implants, if I recall.
That's enough for me.
Derek says that I trust him.
Dude, so right there, he looks like he might be flexing and in his best shape, right?
I have seen this guy's abs not flexing.
I have seen his abs in my own personal disastrous position,
which is, say, on the toilet leaning forward.
He's in that posture.
Yeah.
Still awesome abs in that sort of leaning forward, hunched forward thing.
His abs look great.
Those are implants. it's like those are
implants that that's what they are what kind of liver is that like a fucking like it's gonna be
like a buffalo dinosaur no there's no way a cow's liver is that big that's like a buffalo it's huge
anyway apparently he spends twelve thousand dollars a month on a performance enhancing drugs
all right so that number is probably um wrong like like like are you telling me the internet
is wrong yeah the internet i think i think i think that i don't know quite enough to 100
debunk that but i i would love to hear derrick's take on well i mean yeah 12 grand if you were a
dummy and derrick's the one that exposed him. Somehow Derek got his shopping list.
Okay.
I did see that screenshot.
All right.
Well, I guess that if he's playing for,
I guess it's pharma grade human growth hormone,
and I guess that's why.
I thought that you could buy human growth hormone
in a sketchy place.
That's the thing.
He's buying it through a doctor.
That's what this proof is all about. He using a doctor okay yeah yeah and i don't like i'm aware that testosterone is
inexpensive but i don't know what all that other shit costs like there are what are the other drugs
i know trend everyone knows about trend but there's one that starts with an a there he was
on a cocktail of do you have the screenshot because the
one i saw had the fronts of the words all cut off so i had to like put together the things that i'm
like aware of and i know of but i don't know like the nitty-gritty cost of individual i know that
human growth hormone is very expensive if you go through the doctor and shockingly inexpensive if you were to like get it somewhere else somehow so igf-1lr cjc with
imap ibutamorin omnitrope test cyp6 cc's per week deca 6 cc's per week win a windstraw 50 milligrams
a day this seems like so so the steroids the ones that i know about
is the testosterone cypionate the 0.6 cc's a week i'm gonna be bad at doing this math but is that
fucking 1200 milligrams a week i don't know so that's like i'm i'm stoned right now so forgive
me of what of testosterone those bottom three are steroids. Yeah, decadirabalin, I would assume.
And then Winstraw is like a...
And test.
Winstraw is another steroid.
The top four, I don't really know what they are.
It's an oral that he's taking a lot of.
Oh, my goodness.
That makes sense.
He mentions in his email here, 16 vials a month.
So that is going to be roughly 69.6 international units of
recombinant human growth hormone per week which is roughly 10 international units per day which
is like a fucking really really high super expensive dose dosage that to be honest i know
bodybuilders who compete in the open mr olympia who use less pharma grade gh than that that's how
high of a dose that actually is derek said
yeah so so so there's some guys who are like real open about how much hgh they've used or
use and you hear like oh yeah like like this far during prep time right before the event i start
i usually do one iu a day but i step it on up to two and a half and it's like three or four yeah this guy was doing
five and he was breaking into 2.5 twice a day it's wild he's doing 10 a day over there i don't know
what that other stuff is between the the what i call the testosterone and the and the human growth
hormone i don't know what that stuff is i don't know omni tropes sounds familiar but i don't know what the fuck that is anyway uh yeah so apparently i i
i almost feel bad for him sure he's been scamming people that his physique is achievable with just
liver and good eating and a lot of the shit he says are like he has good philosophies if you
followed his advice you'd be okay yeah your expectations would just
be wrong thinking you could look anything like him yeah but i still feel bad for him somehow
because i think that he's like um remember that episode of rick and morty when it turns out that
that one that one that guy tries a child child molest Morty.
And and instead of exposing him when they like go through his his stuff later on to find all the child porn, they let the legend live on because he's dead now. And he was a hero to so many people.
It's like that.
So you want to let him kind of remain being that?
No, exactly.
You're talking about that
like jellybean who wanted to rape morty and then they're like we'll keep him as he was it's better
to let the people look up to a hero than to know the villain he became or whatever the fuck
is said but like he's a moat he's there to stand and be an example and it doesn't matter if you
nobody's ever going to look like him because you're not going to be him like but but if you nobody's ever gonna look like him because you're not gonna be him like but but if you strove to be like him eating liver you'd look like you'd look amazing you'd look really fucking good you'd
be like you know what i don't look like the liver king probably good thing because he's gross i do
look good though and i'm getting pussy now like that's what would actually happen but instead like
like like but now you've got an excuse now you've got an excuse to quit anybody who was on the edge because they go like, see?
It's not even worth trying.
You see what it takes to win?
It takes $12,000 a month to win.
Fuck that.
Get out of here.
I'm going to sit on the couch.
It is.
I don't like that.
You have to also look, and I didn't know much about the guy.
I'm just on his website looking at his fucking-
It doesn't, by the way.
It takes like a couple hundred his uh looking at his nine ancestral tenets
of sleep eat move shield connect cold sun fight bond and like his whole shtick apparently is like
live like the ancient live like the primordial man like like run around your yard and yell at animals
like do do whatever you want to do like bond with people connect you know what is it cold and then
sun not not cold and heat cold and sun and like he's instructing people to do all this with the
tacit and overt claim that this is what i do be natural be like a man running around the serengeti trying to get a
fucking zebra like that's who i am do this and it's like a total lie it's it's a hundred like
and every time every show he went on every syllable out of his mouth every time he was asked
you're natural this and that shameless lie a lie by the way that anyone who's
ever lifted a weight in their life and is male can look at and go you are lying and so he's not
hitting people like us who are going to get swallowed into this because we've all lifted
weights enough to know this guy's a fucking douche and so he's really just taking advantage of people
who are trying to get into this and so those are the kind of people who are going to get
discouraged by a reveal like and be like the whole thing was trash so he could he was eating mcdonald's
and and po boys and you know crab boils all day you know in secret and he could have been doing
that as much as he wanted because he'd still look the same no no there's nothing that like that guy was eating he's eating his liver but the whole it's a fucking lie it's not like he lied to
hundreds of people's faces obviously imagine me like wearing this shirt and you're like so taylor
it's so interesting like so you you're all about wearing gray shirts and i'm like yeah like yeah
and then like the shirt wasn't gray the whole time. Like you can see it's green.
I know it's green.
It's a green shirt, but I insist you refer to it as gray.
And I maintain that it is great.
He's definitely working crazy hard, though.
Of course.
But it's a it's a lie.
Oh, it's total.
I mean, unless you want to.
Not anymore.
Now we know that here that's taking advantage of people with a lie.
Well, now that we know the truth.
No, but here's that's taking advantage of people with a lie.
Well, now that we know the truth.
You do know that that is attainable without having to eat all that nasty liver and make friends with strangers, folks.
He might have eaten the liver, though.
That's one way to look at it.
You know, I'm confused.
First of all, what?
Making friends with strangers was part of his thing.
I think he was.
That must be connect connect let's see what
connect is let's let's research the ancestral tenets he had a whole philosophy he had a whole
philosophy and i'm and i'm guessing that like tenants of it were were meant to boost your
testosterone when i hear running if he wants you to run around chase animals i'm thinking that like
ah there's those weird studies for like doing certain things, boost your testosterone. Like if you're having more sex,
if you're around more like women,
um,
you're around more attractive women,
like,
like,
uh,
your testosterone will just go up.
You do more squats,
your testosterone goes up and like,
you know,
you do enough of those things.
Maybe if he had a whole like list of them and he had these poor assholes
jumping through hoops.
And meanwhile,
he's sticking over half a,
a,
a gram in his, uh, in his ass slash arm every week.
Yeah.
I mean, and like, here's the kind of tenets we're looking at here.
I just clicked connect.
I haven't read any of the other ones, but there's whole paragraphs on it.
The fifth ancestral tenet is connect.
Our early ancestors were in constant contact with the earth 24-7-365.
The earth has a slightly negative charge,
which provides a grounding force for our electrophysiology with the advent of
rubber shoes,
cars,
houses,
and elevated beds.
We no longer come into contact with this grounding force.
Think about it.
When was the last time you had your bare feet planted on the earth for any
real duration?
The benefits of connecting to the earth include better sleep improved blood pressure and anti-inflammatory and protection against emfs all you have to do is take your shoes off and put your
bare feet directly on the earth or hug a tree and pen pin 10 things a day why can't you just get one
of those bracelets that you have to wear when you put a PC together. Just fucking ground yourself all the time.
Like, yeah, I got work to do.
I'm not taking my shoes off.
Do you see what I'm saying now?
Pinning all of this shit and then telling people to take their shoes off?
Yeah, he's trying to be a, what do you call him?
Not a guru.
That's what it is.
Oh, me?
Take your shoes off, idiot.
Like, come on.
How can you not be insulting what's shield let's see
what shield is the fourth ancestral tenant is shield because we need to avoid dangers just
like our early ancestors did but instead of running from lions nowadays we run from seed oils
excessive wi-fi emfs and man-made poisons dangers like these end up i didn't know pounding with an
additive effect they disrupt our hormones metabolism and ability to get deep sleep start by turning your wi-fi off
at night and stop wearing perfume the name of the game is progress not perfection perfume out of
nowhere left field i would love to be the copywriter that's assigned this where you're
just like fucking uh shield. Okay.
Okay, let's see what else you got.
Let's see what other tenets we could learn from this guy
who knows what he's talking about.
Would I have lower body?
I hardly ever wear shoes. What am I talking about?
Why isn't it working for me?
But you gotta connect with the ground. You gotta be outside
barefoot. I mean, sometimes.
No, all the time.
Fuck. I have burrs in my yard they're pointy
little those will toughen you oh wait wait did you mention seeds because seed oils i know he
mentioned that you stay away from those seeds i love seeds all right i didn't know he was running
a whole like fake guru scammy scam thing with some Eastern influences.
I thought he was just saying,
yo, take my pills and eat my liver and you'll be big like me, little man.
I thought it was some shit like that,
but now this sounds like a whole creepy thing.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's scammy.
That's pretty shit.
I heard he made $100 million this year.
All right, well, he's all good now, then.
That is pretty cool
to make that much money, but
he misled a lot of people.
This is...
When you saw this break, when you saw Derek
break this,
was there one ounce
of surprise? Everyone knew this.
Everyone knew this. I was just happy
it was Derek. The only people who didn just happy it was derrick the only people
who didn't know i'm happy to juice to the gills were people who are new enough to this to be
taken advantage of like that and so clearly that's uh the people who were buying into this
because people like derrick me you woody like none of us would have bought into this because
we've touched weights before not only did i know that he was on steroids i knew those were ab implants i so i
didn't abs are one of my uh like they're not one of my best body parts but they're one of my favorite
body parts if i see someone who has their abs together i feel like most of their physique is
together i get it skinny guys can have abs but but mostly that's what blows me away and his abs are
just fake they're're beyond perfect.
I just thought they were perfect.
I just thought they were perfect.
They are that.
Yeah.
You know, like he does.
I mean, he's absurd.
It's not like he has little bitty arms and a small neck.
And then he's huge.
It's like he looks like a professional wrestler or something.
Like he's that level.
So he's five, seven.
You would think they were fake if you saw what I saw.
So he's being interviewed by one of these guys trying to expose him.
And they're like your abs,
their implants,
right?
He goes,
no,
they're implants,
right?
No,
relax your abs for me.
Show me what your abs look like.
Relaxed at this point.
I'm always tensed.
When I sleep,
I sleep doing ab exercises. Yeah. Do do every podcast like there's a tiger in the
about to pounce at you he claimed he does as well in his sleep that he's just always tensed and it's
like no they're surgically implanted yeah and all his videos like unless he's like stand like i saw
a photo oh you know what they should have done next to uh do you know who big cat is like the
barstool sports like really popular guy he's like probably six three or something and he
is three heads taller than uh the liver king man and so those videos you see of the liver king
where it's just him there like being five seven and that fucking jacked you look way bigger than
a dude who's six two and that fucking jacked and so when like he
looks like a mountainous man in all the videos he's showing people which is like i mean again not
not not super realistic but oh man he yeah okay so the guy next to him the guy next to him is like
six two something like that the tall one yeah and liver
king i think he's not wearing i think he's i think he put on some big shoes uh i think he i think he
didn't ground himself here that that censorship that covers their like it this this is gay what
a funny way to like make fun of the liver king i would have i would have gone into this knowing how uh big that lower third
was gonna be and i'd have pulled my pants up even higher it would be fucking hilarious if
your pants was up right under his nipples right right there i'd have gone the other way i'd have
pulled them up taking them off oh so you could see skin underneath liver king is what the fuck
is the liver king wearing he's like wearing bicycle shorts i can see like his
his thigh he doesn't wear a lot of clothes and you know what his body is popping he looks great
he does look great he looks tremendous in every room he's in yeah that's why he's compelling yeah
yeah and he's a good speaker too you know it's a testament to how good he looks
that he's like take your shoes off and
eat organ meat and people are like okay how much you need to be in the cold sometimes i don't
fucking know man just you need to bond with your friends and family like we're like you're in a
tribe in ancient sumeria it's like all right all right
like is that kind of like like what we like with thanksgiving and because i'm not jacked yet that
was not helpful bonding over thanksgiving for my way the opposite i trusted you yeah that's just
it's so so bizarre that he had that derek had to make a video with facts for people.
This guy was getting away with it like Capone, and then Derek got him on tax fraud.
Yes.
With just a little paperwork mishap.
Everyone knew.
Derek's really successful.
I feel like he's the center of the fitness universe.
I won't say he's the biggest or the most influential, but like, God, everybody pays attention to Derek.
He's been on the Jerry twice.
He talked about Kamaru Usman's, I guess he has bumps on his belly from when you have really low body fat.
Sometimes little nodules pop up.
And Kamaru gave the actual, I think Derek got got it wrong but he hurt kamara usman's feelings
when he talked about this thing discoloration on his body yeah it was a lump like a little pop
it looked like a pimple with no color i don't know but uh i'm just saying i bet every ufc fighter
knows who derrick is i bet chel son and certainly talks about him sometimes. This political podcast.
I watched use Derek as the source,
as they talked about the liver King,
that Derek is the center of the fitness.
You start steroid,
you get Derek.
That's a,
so he's got some real good optimization going on over there.
And like,
like the natty or not video started.
I think it for him is just like,
yeah,
it's that kind of thing I do to pay the bills.
And now it's like,
and that is what has brought this empire together.
Yeah.
Yeah.
His business philosophy of making quality products is one that works too.
And it's surprisingly rare in the fitness industry.
Yeah.
He's the guy like,
like it's like he started out debunking everybody's stuff.
And,
and,
and he was just like,
man, I, it was such a smart idea to be like like i know what i want in a pre-workout i'm just gonna
gonna have to make my own which sounds so crazy at first if i told you i had a friend who usually
makes his own pre-workout you'd be like okay don't take that caffeine pills and gatorade
you're like coming at him with a scoop of something
that your friend made
multiple colors man
I'm not drinking that
you've ruined my water
you can listen to Derek talk about any fitness thing
for just a few minutes and be like
oh like this guy
has a sincere obsession with this
stuff like in his free time
he's like reading studies and things because he's just interested like he wants to know what works
what doesn't why it works how much it takes for it to work like all that kind of stuff yeah very
interesting i love his channel it's great i'm sure he's like uh it's it's a it's a safety thing i
think a lot of people who would otherwise have hurt themselves,
if they're doing stuff illegally,
have maybe not hurt themselves because of either his warnings, advice,
or just his clinic where he can go and just get TRT.
Yeah.
Speaking of supplements, this morning, over the weekend,
I bought a couple of those 40-ounce bottles of cold brew coffee from the grocery store.
Just pour a glass in the morning and have some.
And I just grabbed a brand.
I didn't really know.
It was called Wide Awake.
It was the cheapest, and so I just grabbed it.
And I didn't look at the back to see how much caffeine was in
it and i poured myself like a probably like a big glass like a 16 ounce glass of this because i was
like juice glass full yeah like a juice glass full of it and i start drinking it this morning
and like i'm like halfway through it and i'm in that like like i'm feeling i'm feeling like really good and i like
kept drinking it and i swear to god like an hour after i'd started i finished it and i'm like
like i'm getting like really really stressed out i'm like standing up and pacing and like my
like my heart is beating fast i'm like what on earth like i'm not oh like i'm not super stressed
out about anything and i was like the coffee how much coffee did you drink i'm like that holds like 16 ounces i guess i went and looked
it's 320 milligrams of caffeine per 12 ounces oh my and so it was like 410 plus milligrams which
for me is a panic inducing amount it was i didn't get a lot done this afternoon because I've spent so much time pacing.
Like it was a few hours of being uncomfortably jittery.
It did not care for it.
Now I know that's an ear.
Okay.
I was going to say,
it's like,
they should have made that more clear,
but it is called wide awake.
And there's like a picture of like a shocked owl on it.
But I, I, you. But I didn't know.
I didn't say, like,
extra straight said breakfast blend.
Like, you know how you ease into the back?
That's like somebody eating...
Come on.
Is there a warning on the back?
No.
Does it say anything about pregnant women on the back?
It probably does if you check it out.
But no, it was way stronger than I imagined it would be.
Like, if you have a high caffeine tolerance, it it was way stronger than I imagined it would be. You have a high caffeine tolerance.
It would have been enough to get you up and moving.
That's more than a bang, and a bang is too much.
Yeah, I try to keep my tolerance to a reasonable level
because if I take it, I'm ready to do something.
You don't want to get in that position where you're drinking cup after cup after cup of coffee if i have a cup of coffee i'm i'm up now yeah i i didn't know i
was gonna get any sleep this morning because because the fucking between trying to get that
computer fixed and my goddamn dog that motherfucker that little motherfucker he's got like diarrhea
this week and so he's got a last week i don't know last couple days. He's got to shit
every 20 minutes.
Every 20 minutes, we go outside, and he's just like,
thanks, boss. I really had to go again.
It's like, oh my god, dude.
I've got to get him some new food, and I'm going to take him
to the vet tomorrow, but he's just shitting
continuously, so I can't sleep.
I can't sleep.
He keeps me awake.
I get these little cat naps like I'm Leonardo da Vinci and it's driving
me insane
I'm just not getting
that fucking
I was here trying to get that PC thing sorted
and I just had my head on my desk
just with the phone
on speaker listening to their
obnoxious weight music and I would nod
off and then
so you didn't sleep at all
last night maybe three hours morning i think i got three hours last night and then like this
afternoon i got a little cat nap in i think something like that because i was up really
fucking late last night playing this stupid game because i'm addicted to it i played 170 hours of dark sides that's so much didn't it come out two days ago no no no
to see it it's all the beta stuff so like i go to the steam reviews and they're these guys they're
like i've played a ton and i think this and that they'll have 30 40 hours and i'm just like
i'm writing my review like you're like I've played a ton and I hate your game
like 170 hours
I wrote a review like that I wrote a scathing
review like
you know just all the things that
I said earlier yeah I've played it a
shitload and I played it way too much last night
and didn't get any sleep
because I didn't know I was going to have to be up this morning doing
stuff like right from 7am or
whatever so yeah
just needing my caffeine to work.
You can correct your sleep schedule tonight.
Go to bed as soon as we're done at 10 p.m. or 11 p.m. for you.
Yeah.
Yeah, I'm sure that's going to happen.
I mean, I got a new PC here.
I haven't even put Discord on that thing.
I got some stuff to do.
That'll be an exciting all right are you like
someone who like gets annoyed having to put all your old programs and everything on it or is it
kind of like i'm excited to get rolling i'm um i can't remember what the the thing is called
there's a website called nanite or something but you go there and it has like every one of the
programs that you need to kind of get a pc going, the really common one, steam is on there and all the,
the C plus plus redistributable nonsense.
And you just click,
take a bunch of boxes and click go.
And it just puts all that shit on your computer for you.
Like everything from Chrome to like,
um,
win RAR and everything,
everything that you use,
all your utilities and commonly used programs.
So that went pretty quick.
Damn, that's useful. I didn programs. So that went pretty quick.
Damn, that's useful.
I didn't know about that.
Yeah.
The way I did it was just like,
I don't need to log into that account on this PC, I guess.
It's on my phone.
Yeah, that's fine.
I'll just keep rolling on my phone until it dies. Yeah, I don't need a bunch of stuff on there anyway.
I just need all the gaming peripheral programs, really.
That's all it's going to do.
I'm almost done with better call Saul.
I bought season six and I've watched like four episodes a night the past two nights.
So I'm like right there.
I don't want to,
I'm not going to spoil anything because it's a great show.
And I,
I think people out there will watch it,
but it's a,
it is not as good as breaking Ben,
but it is very solid.
Very good. I, I don't want to say anything bad, but it is very solid. Very good.
I,
I don't want to say anything specific,
but it like got much,
much harder in like season,
the end of season four,
five to like,
uh,
Saul at all because he,
he kind of,
it felt like he almost pivoted from like,
he,
I guess the best way to put it,
he became much much
pettier like very petty and took circuitous ways to achieve goals out of spite that could have
easily been accomplished in other ways um i'll leave it at that like with the sandpiper thing
but uh oh yeah it was like why did he handle it this way oh vindictiveness for you know this
this other guy that he has a grudge against other than that i'm really liking it you yeah i love
howard yeah fuck him fuck howard wait howard's his brother right no chuck's the other part okay so
how i can't remember howard's like like what he did specifically, but I think of Howard as,
cause I'm only through like maybe season five,
five and a half.
It's weird when they make these 0.5 seasons.
But anyway,
we're about the same place then.
Yeah.
I think of a Howard is,
is,
is like a really good guy who,
if it hadn't been for,
for his,
for Chuck,
you know,
Jimmy would have been a partner or in the,
in the firm.
Right.
Like,
like I think, i think that chuck
was the one who's like no and is it that to me was the moment when i was just so on board with
jimmy when it's like your own brother is the impediment like like you you'd have been so
taken aback by that if you're if you're jimmy you're like man you guys had a meeting my brother
and his partner had a meeting and they were deciding where they were going to let me in as the and we'd be a trio came back the answer was no
go to my brother i said what happened man why isn't he on my side and he's like well actually
it was i just don't think uh nah you're not partner material yeah like oh actually uh it
was me your brother not the other the other guy would let you in. Yeah. He doesn't want another McGill on the on the fucking like billboard outside.
Placard or whatever.
Yeah.
That Chuck did not did not like how he treated Jimmy.
He was a douchebag.
That's a great actor, by the way.
The guy that plays Chuck, like he's so good.
You go back to all that.
He's done so much comedy stuff.
He's so good at playing. Oh, really? That cr plays Chuck, like he's so good. You go back to all that. He's done so much comedy stuff. He's so good at playing.
Oh, really?
That cringy, like weird character.
Yeah, he's in that.
He's in all that stuff with the dog show movie, Best in Show.
And they made like three of them.
They're all kind of themed separate.
Similarly, with all with that whole cast of actors.
Best in Show.
And then there's one where oh he's in spinal tap
that's the one i didn't see but but yeah i think those are all made by the same guy maybe
oh i didn't know about that okay well yeah he's a good actor he he was annoying as shit and made
me dislike him on multiple occasions fucking hated him but you need that you need those
annoying characters i liked uh or i guess i like what i've seen so far from like as far as jimmy's always an interesting
character but he just gets so fucking petty and i like it though i like the pettiness i'm like oh
we're gonna get him huh how good yeah that's good that's good it gets to the point where like
they're not even scamming people for material gain as much as they enjoy fucking with people.
What about when they got Yule out of trouble?
Yeah, I like Yule a lot.
I'm glad they got Yule out of trouble.
Is it Yule?
Yule, yeah.
Okay, I was thinking Yule.
I haven't seen it in a while, and I'm thinking Yuletide carols.
haven't seen in a while and i'm i'm thinking like yuletide carols no i learned in this show it's yule and kubi is bill burr's character that's his name is he in any of better call saw i don't i
don't think right i haven't seen him yet i don't believe it it's hard to remember because i like
came off the back of re-watching better uh breaking bad and so i don't remember if i've
seen much of him he always played it so well yeah he i mean he always plays the same guy he always
plays himself but he always does a good job because he's playing it's a reasonable character
yeah like i liked him in a mandalorian a lot and i was surprised that i that i did when i heard he
was going to be in be in an episode it i was like oh is this going to be like when they had Ed Sheeran in fucking Game of Thrones out of nowhere singing a fucking song?
But no, he was
good. He added to the
show.
I like the episodes he's in.
And I really liked him
in Mandalorian. I thought that was a good character.
Like, this whole thing about the helmet.
He's like riffing as they're driving
into the fucking Imperial Fortress.
Ah, I see how it is. Sometimes you take the helmet off sometimes you can't you know maybe uh oh this
helmet it's okay to wear this helmet is it just you can't show your face or is you can't take the
helmet off which is it like make your mind up what's the what's the what's the deal could you
just wear a mask like was that that show's not worth watching for me is it i watched like episode one and two
and lost interest i'm just not that into the star wars world to me i fucking love it and it's not
even they've gotten more into the star wars world later because they're they let it weave with the
rest of their like universe stuff but i like it a lot but i like that little green fuck. I like Grogu, the little baby Yoda guy.
I love him.
I like the Mandalorian.
I like that actor ever since Game of Thrones.
And I don't know.
I think they do a really good job with that show.
I like all the characters.
There's no overly woke shit.
There's no cringy shit like there is in Boba Fett.
To me, it's just like there's a couple of like really cool moments where you think all is lost and then like then that's when they have like
a guest star come in that you didn't think was going to be on this little tv show it's like holy
shit he's here or they cgi somebody back from the dead or something you know literally or you know
they have a good i like it a lot and i i
think it's some of the best star wars stuff ever made but i don't like star wars like i don't like
any of the movies really i like um the news that they made a movie and or is that i haven't watched
andor but i bet i'm going to like it because the complaints i've heard are like it's just a slow
noir story about little characters we're the jedi and i'm just like like it's just a slow noir story about little characters we're
the jedi and i'm just like really it's a little story about about a future spaceman who's got
like a laser gun and he's like a detective or something like or or something i don't know what
it's about i haven't watched any of it but i think i'm going to try that out uh i think maybe woody
watched it and liked it i don't know for what that's worth. So I think I'm going to check Andor out.
I liked that movie that came out with a couple of years ago where they were
like,
where everybody dies at the end.
It's a star.
It was a star.
It was kind of a standalone star Wars movie set in like the past part of the
universe,
but everybody died at the fucking end.
And I liked that one too,
but like the original trilogy,
like the,
the moderate,
the prequels and,
and the recalls
or whatever they're calling the stuff with Daisy Ridley
that they made a couple years back, I don't like any of that.
I really don't.
I don't even like it a little.
I really dislike it.
I remember, I think you tried to like it a bit.
Oh, I've watched it all.
I know a lot about the lore and about the silliness of it all,
and I still
can't make any of the content
they've made match how cool
the lore and universe are
because all that shit's cool.
They're space wizards with laser
swords. What's not to like?
Oh, George Lucas.
Oh, okay. That's right.
What? Does he just fuck everything up?
I don't like the cutesy shit.
You liked Baby Yoda. Didn't you? Baby Yoda's different. right yeah what does he just fucking everything up i don't like the cutesy shit you know and and
you liked baby yoda didn't you baby yoda's different that is the most fancy shit you can
i can imagine i can't help it they did a better job look if i'm a hypocrite for liking baby yoda
then so be it but like i hate the ewoks i hated the ewoks back in the day not that i was there
when they were made or anything,
but you know,
when I watched it for the first time and I hate,
hate,
hate Jar Jar Binks and how he like undercuts what should be like the
beginning of a tragedy with fucking fart jokes.
Yeah.
And,
and,
and,
but,
but baby Yoda,
like he's,
it's,
he's just a cute little guy who's stuck in.
He doesn't make,
he doesn't riff.
He doesn't make doodoo jokes. He's like, he's just a cute little guy who's stuck in he doesn't make he doesn't riff he doesn't make doo-doo jokes he's like he's there and like when he when he interacts it's it's always just like pure love or pure like magical like oh yeah motherfucker i'll choke
you out and so like i like his character probably because he can't talk if they could give baby yoda
lines i'd hate him i bet when he starts talking lines. When he starts talking, I'll turn, he'll be like,
hmm, women aren't represented enough, hear me, thanks.
Where are they?
I am the only green person here.
All of you whiteys in the patriarchy.
I'm actually not male or female.
All right.
Is that Kanye on the radio? I'm actually not male or female. I'm a, all right, boop.
Is that Kanye on the radio?
Like if Grogu starts having some really strong like political leanings, like you could scare me off.
But right now he's a goo goo gaga baby
who every now and then is like,
wish a motherfucker would and like force jokes out.
And he's not even Yoda.
No, no, he's not.
He is a whatever Yoda's called.
I keep going back and forth
between his real name and just saying Baby Yoda
for the uninitiated random person
who might hear this and not have seen that shit.
I think it's well worth watching.
I like it a lot, but you won't.
Master Yoda.
No, you don't.
What's your favorite sci-fi?
I don't know. In your favorite sci-fi?
I don't know.
In the last few years, I liked The Martian a lot.
I thought that was good.
That's not sci-fi?
He was making fucking potatoes on Mars.
It was science.
That's all based on real science.
Everything he did was science.
There's no fiction there other than the characters.
Other than the whole premise.
No, the characters. Everything there is real science you can we can get there we can grow those you can make water out of rocket fuel like all that's real science okay well what's what's a top
tier sci-fi movie i'll tell you if i like it tippity top i mean 2001 a space odyssey i guess
although i'm kind of running watch maybe minutes. I was way too high to track
with it. I stopped. Most people think it's boring.
They don't like it, but I think it's one of my favorites.
Jackie and I watched all of Star Trek. Star Trek 2, The Wrath of Khan.
There you go. Star Trek.
Star Trek, the new Wrath of Khan is better.
Not.
It's just not.
They don't understand...
It's not.
It's not.
That whole end scene where it's like a submarine battle
because neither ship can see the other,
and so they're sort of stalking each other,
trying to figure out a way to find the other,
like jerry-rigging torpedoes and stuff,
and William Shatner's hamming it up,
trying to make Ricardo Montalban mad.
He's like, Khan, you haven't beaten me, Khan.
I'm still down here, Khan.
I'm alive.
Alive. you haven't beaten me, Khan. I'm still down here, Khan. I'm alive.
Alive. I'm laughing at your superior intellect,
Khan.
I'm starting to turn into
Jim Carrey.
And
Ricardo Montalban is like,
all right, take us into the
nebula. And then the guys are
not the nebula. And they go.
I love that. Star Trek II, the Rathacon then the guys they're not the nebula and they go and i love that star trek to
the wrath of khan the original is so fucking good to me they put the creatures in check of seer
the creatures so it's been a long time since i've seen it so i can't effectively counter but i just
saw the new one and i liked it a lot i love the fucking new star treks that it did me i just
watched the theaters we you and i watched the me
you and joe lozon watched the wrath of khan in the new one then well there's the the new wrath of khan
when it came out then on the night it came out and roger that i i watched it with jackie like
two nights ago and uh and we watched all three of the new star treks recently. Dude, Star Trek is so good.
And it's so much better than Star Wars.
I know.
I know.
I want to like Star Wars more.
People say it's better.
It's the bigger franchise, I'll admit.
But they're just like, all right, we've got these guys illegally mining.
Anyone here have, like, fencing and skydiving experience?
And some guys are like, I'm in.
Or like, oh, we're stuck on a planet.
We're going to need some motocross
and base jumping skills so he starts riding his motorcycle around his circles distracting the bad
guys it star trek is a blast it is a fucking action movie it is a sci-fi movie and it is fun
from start to finish star wars oh my god tell me again about the senate filibusters like you're killing
me with this if you want a tv show that's star trek that's really good either of you star trek
uh brave new strange new worlds is the newest of the new star treks it's amazing it's some of the
best star trek they've ever made it's as good as the Next Generation. It's very good. The main guy
is Captain Pike. This is like the prequel
before Kirk happens. And Captain Pike
has been shown his future.
His future is that he will be
crippled
in a wheelchair, unable to speak
with his face melted off, and he can't
move his arms either. But it
saves the lives of all these children.
And he knows it's coming. He knows it's coming. it saves the lives of all these children and so he and and he knows
it's coming he knows it's coming he knows the names of the children and every night he's just
you gotta tune that out he's just he's just he's just reciting the names of and he's just like
i know it's coming down some road i don't know when exactly but it's coming and i'll face it
when it does but until then we're here and we're here to fight the gorn and the klingons and the purple people and the green
people and uh rebecca remains stamos x used to be stamos that she was the original uh mystique
in the x-men movies like the blue chick that's wearing nothing yeah she's the first officer
she looks like she's six two she's fuck she's just this big sexy bitch
always like that and uh no it's a very very good show they just go on star trek episodes and do
stuff i guess it came from star trek discovery these characters the guy that plays spock is
great he's got a hot ass fiance um and their relationship's weird because he's you know like
half human and she's like i don't know You might be a little bit too human to marry.
She's super cold about it.
No, that's a very good TV show if you like Star Trek.
And if you didn't like Star Trek Picard, which is just an abomination.
Just an abomination.
I'll trust you on that.
Is The Thing a sci-fi movie?
Yeah, I think it's a sci-fi movie, yeah.
Okay, that's my favorite sci-fi.
That's a good one.
Pike dies in the new wrath of Khan.
He gets shot by Khan.
Khan's in a spaceship outside these office buildings,
and they're fighting him, and that's how Pike dies.
That's the Kelvin timeline.
Okay.
Yeah, I just thought when you said Pike knows how he dies i'm like oh so do i
and then that wasn't it and i was like oh okay yeah that's the kelvin timeline and uh but but
they're going by the prime timeline and uh if you go back to the original tv show episodes one and
two i think from like the 60s pike's the captain and he's on a little adventure on this planet with these people.
Their heads are like
giant testicles
and they're really smart
and that's where he gets
all melted up
and he shows up
to like the meeting.
They like,
his like wheelchair comes in
and he's all like disgusted.
Show me Captain Pike
with his face melted,
Zach,
from like the original
60s Star Trek.
That's a tough ask,
but okay.
Oh,
it's going to be so easy.
Captain Pike, original series. Wheel Trek. That's a tough ask, but okay. It's going to be so easy. Captain Pike
original series.
Wheelchair.
And then melted face.
He's just like, I'll try to do the face
and then he'll
like that.
Like that.
If you were like
if you were like
severely
Yeah.
You know, it would be not funny.
That's some good casting, right?
This is the modern day guy.
That's the guy from the 60s.
Wait, that's what he looks like in the modern day?
Yeah, yeah.
This is modern day Pike.
Like in the new TV show on the left.
That's the guy who plays Captain Pike.
Yeah, they picked someone who looks so similar.
Good job.
He's a good actor.
I like him a lot.
Like he's a good fucking captain.
I don't know.
I'm digging that show a lot.
I'm looking forward to the next season.
There's a whole season of it out if you want to watch.
Highly recommend that.
I think I'm going to watch that 1899 German show.
That's a good one.
I've read good things about it,
and I'll just have to lock in and and focus because of i'm
so glad you told me not to watch it with dubs because if a fundamental part of it is like
someone from like italy not being able to understand someone from germany that'd be very
confusing like just having to go by like that guy's that group has mustaches i'm gonna go italian
like yeah yeah if you turn the dubs on for anybody wants wants to watch 1899 on netflix then
the conversations that they have about their inability to communicate don't make any sense
because suddenly french german polish whatever the fuck is just all english and it's people
talking about not being able to understand each other and English. So it gets weird.
So turn the subtitles on and
listen to the original languages.
So before, because
Tucker is supposed to be joining, I'm going to
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before he gets here.
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God, Tucker, what are you, not even three minutes early?
Christ.
Oh, you're muted, Woody.
He's having some USB troubles. Oh oh i can't not bump this mic now he's in again when he tries not to bump it all right welcome to the taylor show we're going
to talk about who is leading the nhl in points right now and because because I'm not prepared, we're going to go ahead and pull up the standings
and I'm going to read the box.
Don't fucking mute me.
I didn't even bump at that time.
I was innocent.
What the fuck is happening?
I'm joking, everyone.
I would sit silently before I talked about hockey.
I know what people prefer and what they don't.
What's up, Tucker?
How are you, guys? Sorry, I just bit into a cookie and I talked about hockey. I know what people prefer and what they don't. What's up, Tucker? How are you, guys?
Sorry, I just bit into a cookie, and I just got here.
No, that's good.
It's like it makes you seem like, oh, me?
I'm so casual.
I'm just munching.
I'm just eating a genuine sausage.
Oh, hey, guys, what did I miss?
What did I miss?
Just a bunch of retardation, honestly.
Just a bunch of nonsense.
The usual.
Talk about liver king
weird yeah oh my god kanye yes
you shouldn't have blown that yeah he does not it's like i feel like i'm living in a dave
chappelle skit where he's playing the the kkk clan member who's black and doesn't know it. And I'm like, guys,
we're flying too close to the sun.
Icarus is like the comedy.
Icarus is just like, guys, my wings are burning.
Please stop.
We were talking about it earlier.
I've never seen Alex Jones sitting next to someone
being like, dude, you gotta watch what you say.
There's no young club to watch.
I don't agree with all that. I don't know you say you know you don't know kanye you don't care for nazis do you yeah yeah it's he's like you can you can
walk that one back he's like no i absolutely do i was like it's so funny because people in chat
told me and i'd gone live and um and i'm like oh it can't be that i was like what happened he's
like kanye loves hitler and i'm like well we kind of saw that be that. I was like, what happened? He's like, Kanye loves Hitler. And I'm like, well, we kind of saw that coming.
He's like, no, no, no, but he really loves Hitler.
And I'm like, oh, well, how bad?
And I look at the Twitter trending, and it's during the World Cup,
and I was like, what is this, World War III?
It said Japan versus Spain.
It said actually Hitler.
It said Germany.
And it said, like, United States trending all in order.
And I was like, guys, this is a bad trending page to look at.
There's a lot going on.
A huge amount going on.
Oh, I didn't know that.
Well, that's
too far. When he said Hitler was a good guy,
I was like, well, let's see.
Well, he had to give him props for inventing
the microphone. Duh.
Wait, that's what he said?
Yes.
Oh, my God. He started shouting out the Autobahn. the microphone duh that's what he said well yeah he said oh my microphone
he started like shouting out the autobahn he's like yo vw i love the beetle you know
you want to see some of the best artwork in the world he's got like a whole he's got like a hitler
hr is just like guys don't nobody tweet for a while yeah yeah literally adidas is like thank
god we cut him and hugo boss is like, thank God we cut them.
And Hugo Boss is like shaking.
They're like, we don't have anything with this.
Right, guys?
We don't have anything to do with this.
We took no sides.
We just wanted our team to look fly.
They should pick him up for the memes.
Yeah, they're just like, listen, we just want to make sure you look good.
That's it.
What's that other brand?
They dropped Kanye.
Their name's, I'm going to get it wrong.
Is it Valenciaga?
Valenciaga?
Valenciaga.
Oh, Valenciaga.
So they dropped Kanye, right?
Along with everybody else, right?
At least a couple of weeks ago when he starts going wild.
But then they're like, guys, in marketing,
we got to...
Budget's a little freed up.
I don't know if you guys have noticed.
We got a little money to throw around.
Ideas.
Well, sir, I've been thinking of a whole
underage BDSM
campaign.
Watson, you had me at underage!
Brilliant!
Do it!
That'll sell so many clothes.
We can't even show it.
We can't even show their ads.
Because it was children in Bdsm gear kanye stuff no balenciaga
kanye and now they now they got money for marketing right i'm saying like then they pivoted
to child bdsm listen balenciaga has almost always been this weird like like um some of those some
of those brands uh really got in love with the tongue in
cheek version of like we're doing it because that's what we do and we're quirky and so balenciaga did
like an entire like matrix campaign with complete with very very bad sfx and stuff like on purpose
you know kind of like the look guys but 800 shirt instead and it just says the like balenciaga in
print and you're like okay cool cool um but yeah bdsm doesn't seem too far-fetched for them
well with with children kids that's that's uh that's another element of fucked up and there
was another part too so like i don't remember the kids doing bDSM thing. I remember her holding a teddy bear in a BDSM outfit,
which that's what I said.
I thought,
Oh,
is it?
I thought bondage.
There wasn't any kids.
There was no child spanking each other.
There was like a dominatrix kid.
No,
that's an,
no,
that's an ad.
So the kids were dressed maybe in Balenciaga clothes.
I don't really know,
but they were holding a teddy bear dressed in BDSM shit.
Okay. Nah, there was another shot of like a coffee table and if you zoom in on the coffee tables
there it's like a pro child porn court ruling on the papers that are on the coffee table which just
they're claiming it was a coincidence like oh you know we didn't really realize that it was like a pro child porn court ruling here on the coffee yeah right it was just a prop we grabbed it without reading it
oh yeah just just a prop the kind of prop that you need to semi-hide but not really like come
on they were sort of fanned out like you might hold a deck of like cards well and well i you
gotta wonder because like i'm sure i mean you like there I mean there's so many different levels
as to who is paying for what
and who really knows what exactly is going
on in the marketing meeting because like
you know you like the team that got
hired to make the commercial and hired the
director maybe four steps removed from
Balenciaga's paycheck right it might
be like we hired
our PR firm who hired the marketing
firm who hired the director who worked through with the creative guy.
And they came in with BDSM porn, not sympathizing.
It's just like, all right.
I've also thought of that.
I hate to make excuses for them.
Taylor might know more about this.
Yeah. Yeah.
Like representatives at a company of that size do not allow photo shoots to go out without internal review. Like there's, there's a huge amount of internal review there. Like the idea that,
cause I saw they tried to blame the photographer for it. And it's like, you really think that the
photographer was like, that's great. Oh, you're going to run it by Balenciaga, you know, marketing.
No, no, just like, no, that, that was, that was up on a big screen in a marketing meeting and
they were reviewing what things, you know, could it, what do you think about this one what do you think about that one i am gonna try and play the
worst devil's advocate here but what love it all right what what if that teddy bear was sexy right
no what if no these ones are great what if it was a genuine oversight prop where the intention was
exactly what everybody thought it was but balenciaga just over did not see the subtle child abuse pro porn
thing and i'm going to just simply say what what if the guy reviewed it was like yeah this is edgy
i like it what's that paper saying the guy's like they don't do that we have 480p projector who
knows nobody can read that well originally it was a photo of a naked toddler but we had
so there's a whole company
that makes prop newspapers to avoid this sort of thing right uh it's really funny because if you
look you know you zoom in you can see that many of the articles and newspapers and movies don't
make any sense they're the headlines will be like they'll look like they all fit together but if you
start reading the article it's like wait the front page has an article about like potato salad or
something like it's just nonsensical.
They had to go get that newspaper.
Yeah, they had to put that deliberately in.
Yeah.
All right.
Now, hold on. I am looking at the photos of the thing, and you're right.
These are BDSM teddy bears.
The original one that you linked was kind of like a dystopian
teddy bear i was kind of like all right listen guys come on now the girl's dressed reasonably
like i i would if i had a kid that age i would put her in that well thank god the baby is dressed
reasonably like yeah she's like baby she's oh sorry like i don't know how yeah all kids under
12 look the same to me roger that so i I'm going to call the kid. I'm looking again, four years old.
And she's dressed in a reasonable outfit.
You would send a kid to school.
But she's holding a teddy bear in a BDSM outfit.
The other one's just a shot of a coffee table.
And you really have to zoom in and turn it upside down to read the papers.
But again, only a fool would think that that was an accident or a coincidence.
If you've ever done anything with Hollywood or props or whatever. the papers but again only a fool would think that that was an accident or coincidence you know if
you've ever done anything with um like hollywood or props or whatever oh everything is intentional
yes the props they grab everything's intentional true and the props they have laying around which
was their excuse like we just grabbed it are very specific non-dated things like if you read a
newspaper you can't tell what year that's from or none of the stories say like JFK shot, Ronald Reagan elected.
Like they're just sort of random stuff.
No way that court case.
I can't read this.
What was by accident?
So, yeah.
What is this?
The exquisite?
I guess that's Ashcroft versus free speech.
I guess that's the thing they had on there.
Oh, I see.
Do you think that somebody just got micro dosed out of their mind at Joshua Tree and came back and was like, we're making a statement with this Balenciaga ad, and there were not enough people who understood what that meant in general?
So they were like, literally, I'm going to be honest, the whole brand, the idea of it, weird, right?
the idea of it weird right so this inclusion i can see how you'd over over overlook it and i could put the blame on the person directing the idea but the whole idea of signing off like the general ad
i'm like all right guys like a little bit kind of you know yeah i mean if you're signing if you're
signing off on an ad where it's like yeah we're gonna have young children holding sexually explicit
outfits and they're gonna be giving like like a, like a dead pan face.
It's like when you put it like that,
it's fine to me.
That part was really intentional,
but there's other part could have been slipped.
It's like,
no,
no,
I don't buy that.
I think it was all intentional.
It's a hundred percent obvious that it's intentional,
but did you read what the court case was about?
It's a hundred percent obvious that it was.
No,
no,
no,
no.
I am saying,
I am just simply saying clear.
I think it is insane to, to sit here and think that a $15 billion company, was about it's 100 obvious that it was no no no i am saying i am just simply saying clear i think
it is insane to to sit here and think that a 15 billion dollar company like failed to uh like
like looked at every part of this and was like yeah i think that they looked at the entirety
of it but missed the actual inclusion of this court case which doesn't make it any better
but like it's not as if it's just a random court case that no no no no i know kyle let me translate because i think you're missing you're not getting his point
he's saying valencia who's not the people who took the picture they just funded the ad campaign
they knew about the kids with the teddy bears yeah they might not have known about the text
of the paper that could have right at the well i want to hear about their lawsuit i want to hear about their lawsuit against the the editor and the photographer then because
because they've just been defamed i think it happened yeah i think they're saying all right
well then okay then oh oh they are suing the photographer see here's the thing that's where
it's going to get into i still believe firmly that you are in in full responsibility if like
on my record label, my employee tweeted
some fucked up shit and
like I didn't know about it, I'm still at fault.
Like I'm like, I still have to do things
and be like, hey, I'm sorry that like
at some point this was a possibility
that could happen, right? But if I go
through a marketing campaign
and I'm looking at everything that's going out
and I miss something, no matter
how true that is
like that's infinitely worse remember when disney missed those penises and little mermaid and on the
on the cover of on the box art and was that and then again yes it's 100 real you can like show
the before and after pictures they've changed it the artists like to sneak shit like that and if
you go back to rescuers um the rescuers that's the name of the other animated movie. There's a couple
of frames of just a naked
woman. They're flying through the city
and there's just a big-titted woman
in her house naked there
as they fly past. That's so crazy.
Didn't the Lion
King, that's what it is. Didn't they have something in the
clouds? Yeah, yeah. The Lion King
cover, there's an ass and a thong
in the sky. mean come on clouds
can be kind of kind of round and cheeky it's because like i know like we know at least in
the gaming industry how many people just put easter eggs and it's not a question of
yeah some of these are known but like sometimes the designer just puts on a texture he doesn't
think somebody's gonna ever see on the underside of the texture it's just his initials and you're like whoops found it one day no no i'm backing you i'm backing
you up with the balenciaga oh yeah not knowing what's up here because disney didn't know that
that cheeky artist had snuck some penis heads in they didn't know that that that's literally what
that is that's a cheeky animator who's being like i'm gonna put a thing in here and i'm gonna be
able to tell my friends like hey i may you know i animated that and be like yeah okay buddy you're one of those guys who built
the skyscraper which brick did you light no no no look right here see that dick i drew that dick
yeah here's a photo of me coding the dick show that kyle what do you think can we show this
picture that zach just linked the lion king one i'm almost certainly gonna say we can but um yeah it's just
like a a thongy butt like yeah like listen like if you it's so crudely drawn that i can do better
if you ask me that's a that's a silhouette of a lamp from uh target that they're just showing
like i see the butt like i i see it but i also see the lion's face this i'm just gonna say that
this to me falls firmly in the category of
if you want it to be true, it is,
and if not, then fine.
I can see both ways in which somebody just drew this,
then desaturated it, and was like,
damn, that does kind of look like a butt, though.
And it's like, it wasn't, but like, yeah.
I mean, was it intentional?
I don't think they were going for a butt there.
No.
But, you know, how often do we look?
It's a whole thing, right?
You look at the clouds and imagine the things. come to you right just staring at clouds they form into
objects so like it's kind of i don't see in it i see the ass don't get me wrong but like i don't
think somebody drew that ass when you look at the the fucking knob heads on the cover of little
mermaid or like that naked lady in that clip from rescuers you're like oh okay that's that's
there's no doubt that's penis i'm looking
that's uh that's pretty funny it's it and whenever they uh they catch them they have
to have those little apologies we very sorry about uh the penises
including these cocks massive hulking cocks in all of our Disney films.
That's a solid dick.
Yeah.
That is a solid penis.
But what am I looking at with the other two?
Buzz got hard. There's one of Buzz
Lightyear with an erection.
I don't see
his erection. And the other thing, I don't
see anything. Are they adding some
pixels around his dick there?
I don't see
nothing. I'm hard
scoping that cock and I don't see it.
I get it. Okay okay so he just has seen
something if he's doing this in oh they're like oh he's getting hard then they're yeah yeah yeah
so obviously they're not showing anything in his crotch it's just they're inferring that
with the way that's just good that's just good that was intentional and they absolutely okayed
that though there's nothing wrong with it and there's nothing wrong with the fucking squirrels kissing each other either.
Like the blood's like rushing to his dick.
Like,
Oh,
Oh,
instead of going down up to his head,
it goes down to his dick.
That is,
that does seem to be the case.
All right,
listen,
that sounds like the lady with the monster.
Can't you like,
what do you see here?
The Hebrew sign for six.
Yeah.
I'm okay with that one.
Yeah.
This is like, uh, my okay with all these and I want, they removed the penis. It's'm okay with that one. Yeah, this is like my English teacher.
I'm okay with all these.
They removed the penis in Little Mermaid.
Listen, I want dicks in my...
Wait, phrasing.
I was going to say,
I want people to leave little dicks
in all of the things that I...
Like child dick?
Or like Asian dicks.
I was going to say dicks in the things
that I consume.
What's the difference, Kyle?
Get yourself a Balenciaga sweater.
About 25 years.
I don't know what we're talking about.
The difference between
Asian dicks and the difference between
child penises and Asian penises.
I don't want to talk about that.
I'm going to steer clear of this one.
It's like that fucking clip from
Two Bears, One Cave or whatever.
It's whichever one's wife
is on the show and she asks
the Asian comedian
why is it that you never see too many
Koreans with Down Syndrome?
And he's like, fuck you.
Fuck you.
He's like, what? You know what the fuck you're doing you know why
fuck you because sometimes you can't tell sometimes you can't tell no no it was bobby lee i think no
bobby lee oh it was theo vaughn joking at bobby lee i saw that clip wasn't yeah it was the wife
she was the one getting putting it on him blonde lip. I don't know which ones.
I don't want to watch.
I think the better looking one with the beard.
I don't want to watch Bobby Lee content like not that I did, but after you told me how fucking sad it is.
I'm like, I don't want to watch some poor guy get get like hamstrung and bullied.
I don't want to be the last guy in on a joke.
But so so I'm going to go ahead assume that bobby lee's comedy and his bit
if you will his character that he portrays to the world is the most pathetic man imaginable because
that's kind of i watched him of his old comedy the other day and it was more about like ah my
my asian dad is so asian that he like he's this and now it's like oh today you'd have killed
yourself today if you'd been in my shoes you sure would have um of course You'd have killed yourself today if you'd been in my shoes. You sure would have.
Of course, you'd have killed yourself long ago if you had to walk in my silly tiny shoes that match my baby dick.
Anyway, let me tell you some horror stories about growing up and how no one wants to fuck me
and how I was molested by a guy with Down syndrome for an entire summer once.
Oh, wait, you're going to laugh at that in my face?
A whole summer?
You're going to laugh in my face about how i was a
how about a man with down syndrome was able to repeatedly take advantage of me how
yeah okay well let's laugh that up for a while and then we'll move on to how bad it still bothers me
how many people how many people have to drop the ball for that to happen for a summer that's right
that's a lot of that's a lot of assault because Because that guy wasn't Ocean's Eleven-ing his way
in the, you know,
like, it was probably
obvious.
And, you know, the whole thing with
this girl and, like,
oh, man. Like, it's all
real sad, mean stuff. And even when
somebody's trying to be nice to him, that girl he's with now,
maybe I'm misunderstanding. And I don't
know his whole history or anything.
I just catch clips.
But like, she was like, yeah, I've got low standards,
like really low.
And he's like, well, don't say that.
She's like, no, you don't even know.
In high school, I dated a Samoan with Down syndrome.
She's like, for a long time, they've always been low.
And she's saying this to her boyfriend.
And he's just like fuck i didn't know
that i didn't know that i didn't know you did with down syndrome for a year could be the same guy
yeah yeah it's real sad shit yeah it could be the same guy who molested him how horrific would
that be hopefully it's just hopefully this is just his, he should have been like, and he's getting away with it.
His name wasn't Sammy.
Was it?
Yeah.
Sammy with the big hands.
It's just these Stanley,
some guys standing there like coily buying candy.
You'll never get me.
Oh, uh, me no we can we're making fun of a rapist Tucker
yeah oh you're right you're right yeah he's a
rapist first it's one of those
crimes that precedes no matter what you
are you are at first a rapist
yes wait a second why
is he a rapist
because he raped
wait wait we're talking about the Samo? Wait, wait. We're talking about
the Samoan that she dated?
No, we're talking about the guy who
molested
the same person.
I haven't heard this story. It sounds awful.
It's like the Avengers cinematic universe
of sexual assault.
Yeah, I get a lot of that
stuff sent to me on YouTube
shorts or whatever because I guess I watched them to the end because they're so pathetic that like I have to get to the end because I think you got to stop.
You got to stop engaging with any comedy related shorts because it eventually whatever platform because it just degrades into eventually it will get longer and more like and then you're in the middle of a Norm MacDonald bit in your TikTok seven minutes long. And you're like, all right.
I think you two shorts have to be under a minute.
I've never seen one over a minute.
OK, I was talking about TikTok.
I love them.
Like I'm just sitting there like I'll come upstairs to do a thing and I'll sit down and like start drinking my coffee and like smoking this shit.
And I'm like, oh, fuck.
Thirty five minutes. I'll sit down and start drinking my coffee and smoking this shit. And I'm like, oh, fuck! 35 minutes?
Yeah, you get in. They're so addicting.
I wish you could go
forwards and back in them.
That would be a good feature.
I feel like it just ends.
You can't speak? You just have to
wait for it to repeat.
If I don't hear, I want to scrub. Sometimes it'll be like wait what was that word and you have to listen to
the whole thing again yeah it does just suggest you what you want because i like made the mistake
of watching like a dozen or so youtube shorts that was just like different people who are really into
chemistry being like look at this reaction and now youtube just sends me so many science have you we should
switch i see hockey highlights as an ex-youtuber have you has your eye caught any of those uh like
techniques and been like ah that's a good technique i bet not only do you get a lot of views they
watch to the end sometimes they watch three times in a row and like i've caught a
couple of techniques there's this one where it's like you mumble it'll be like have you ever seen
what it looks like when you breed a giant bernie's mountain dog and the video's still going with a
with a with a blah blah blah and it's that it's some song it's some riff from a song and it's like
lots of slow music and then at the end it goes this is what it looked like and they just show up the dog and it's like dude i've been here for 38
seconds waiting on you to like because you spoke slowly and had a little music it's so annoying
that when you when you start to realize the things that you're doing and like when i make the
conscious decision to post an obscure like steam game and say this is
the funniest online soccer game available that's it and the entire comments 1.5 million comments
is just like what the fuck is the game one thing that i one thing they get me with on the youtube
shorts is they'll make it a perfect loop so my dumb ass
is watching it and at the end they're like and this is how it goes and then they start it again
and i'm like wait a second this is my second playthrough you got me to watch it twice because
you couldn't tell there was no period at the end of the sentence it just flowed into the start you
make that you make it begin with a broken sentence and you make it end with a broken sentence that can they can meld together and you and and the first sentence is abstract enough that you can go along with it
enough that i you've got to be quick-witted and paying attention enough to catch it on the first
loop through no someone who's like got in the background they're all the way through again
make it on what do you mean you don't have to just perfectly script it do it a hundred times
in premiere and then render it it's good a single one that's what they're doing yeah
yeah yeah they're just like all right this time i'm it's really just good script writing but it
is very tasty you're like i'll watch another 10 seconds just for that good loop okay yeah it's um
i've seen a couple little techniques like that it's like man i bet they're getting like
15 more viewership just because of like these little techniques like that. And it's like, man, I bet they're getting like 15% more viewership just because of like these
little techniques.
Like what's it all matter.
Huh?
Kyle,
what's it all matter for?
I don't know.
You tell me what,
I don't know.
I don't fucking know if you're making 700.
I've had,
I'm not,
I don't really use TikTok,
but like I'll have,
my girlfriend will come to me and be like,
yo,
this guy like has 700,000 followers.
Cause he started this trend where it's like giant woman. And I'm like like seeing it i'm like very clever of like a perspective change thing i'm like
cool what does he do with that next month like he's the giant woman guy forever does he make
other trends like what do you do with an eyeball from the future of it but like how is it how are
youtube shorts monetized i don't know they're, actually, they are, but you have to have 4,000 watch hours in 90 days for YouTube shorts to monetize.
And then you have to – I don't know how the monetization is because I don't have that.
There's an acrobatic paraglider.
That's easy, though.
You guys won't care about the content, but he did something cool, and it went viral because it's amazing to see even if you're not into it 20 million views 38 and i saw that and i was just like oh so it's not about money oh
yeah no it's not and but and that's so that's uh i can look at my twitter before i got demonetized
for cursing i said damn in my twitter video and there goes my money um wow yeah if you say any elon get on it twitter monetization is the strictest no blood
no headshots no uh cursing no inferring like that you're you're cursing kind of thing and so i've
been demonetized twice for it but i did monetize a video of meg the stallion twerking on master
chief at twitch con and it got 500 000000 views which gave me $58.
So not bad. There we go.
That's better than that guy did. It is better than that
but it's still like
what's the fucking point?
I make $7 on Instagram
reels every month and I get
a hundred, I get like
I don't know, I get like between 50
and 100,000 views on my
reels. It's like
why am I doing this for $7?
My internet costs more money to upload these things.
I don't mean to be an asshole, but if I had a $7 check, I wouldn't go to the bank.
If they sent it like the old machinima days where you got a physical check, I too would not be taking it.
Mobile deposit, I'd be like, fuck, is this even worth turning my phone on for?
Somebody's really mad
that's an hour of paycheck.
And you know what? That does suck.
That's a valid point.
Get a real job.
But I'm not cashing it.
Get a real job.
Make YouTube shorts.
Where are you working that you make $7 an hour
unless you're a waitress?
Even the minimum wage is everywhere above $7 now make $7 an hour unless you're a waitress? Isn't the minimum wage tax
everywhere above $7 now?
$7.25 minimum, right?
I bet it's not super
uncommon.
If you're living in Nebraska,
somebody's got to work the security shift
in Nebraska.
I get these YouTube shorts from
a guy who I suppose runs some sort
of a welding business.
And he's making bank.
He's at like a welding school watching people weld or something.
And he'll go up to these men there and they're like, I don't know, 18 to 25, I'd say.
And be like, it's pretty good weld you got there.
What do you think it's worth an hour to come work for me?
And he'll say, I don't know, welding like that, about 18 an hour.
He's, I think you're right.
Matter of fact, 19, 15 hours sounds more like it, don't it?
He's like, yes, sir.
And they like shake hands.
And it's like one after another of him.
And then he gets to the guy who's like TIG welding some thin aluminum.
He's like, pretty good stuff right there.
What do you think that's worth?
He's like, right there is worth $50 an hour.
He's like, you're one of the few where I think I'd pay that too.
Yes, sir.
It's like you can see the difference
between 18 an hour welding and 50 an hour welding like the other way i saw the guy be like you know
i think it's worth 20 now and he's like 16 then another guy's like i think it's worth 8 20 like
what they say has nothing to do with what they get paid it seems my guy always went up a little
or like a great same guy i mean we just a different video i mean it's interesting that people get to
eyeball that because it's kind of cool i never really thought i kind of get to do the same thing
when i listen to music demos where anybody in the world can just send a song and like i'll listen to
it for at least one second before i stop and yeah right and you're gotta make a strong impression oh no but that's the thing like when you look
at a well that guy instantly can see like oh you don't have three of the five basic things that i
need therefore you cannot even qualify for me to think about twenty dollars an hour like you're
just simply not like the quality is just visibly not there it's not even it's very easy to tell
in five seconds if somebody has the understanding
of how to make something sound good right and then that literally changes the whole question
between like i'm not wasting my time even gonna continue to listen this is bad there this is super
interesting to me in five seconds a lot of songs are just ramping up like i don't even know what
this song's gonna be like go ahead skip to middle. You're listening to music that's well-made, probably.
How many songs are you listening to that is...
Radio music is going to go through a whole bunch of very, very talented people to get there.
Even the indie stuff is really good.
That's why you're listening to it on the radio.
That's not a fair comparison.
I'm listening to dog shit.
I'm listening to some kids kids first beats and like then some. So like there is a very it's daunting to realize that in any creative subject, I'd argue in any subject matter, it is very easy to get fine.
pay huge difference and very visible and then the difference between worthy of paying like hey man like you got some good stuff going on is like instantly recognizable between that it's like
great but i can see how that guy can look at it be like yeah no you literally just cannot make
50 an hour right now you just don't have it yeah well like if you've ever seen uh like good
landscaping right the difference in like what you would do if you just cut your grass and if you had
a professional come versus if you ever gone to like augusta and seen the fucking grass or any
professional golf course or baseball field yeah yeah like there's there's absolute levels and the
guy that cuts that grass that guy makes a lot to cut that grass i think welding and cutting grass
probably transfers pretty well because the the guy you got some guy out there making $10 an hour cutting grass, right?
Like the guy that cuts my grass.
And then you got some guy who's probably –
Yeah, who's preparing Yankee Stadium.
Remember, there's that family who does it.
There's like a – what field was it where it's like, yeah,
we're the Johnson family.
We handle the field.
Yeah, it's like we do anything that Cleveland needs, we're here.
That's like one of those terrifying setups for like a horror movie. You like get in a baseball field late at night. It's who we do anything that Cleveland needs. We're here. That's like one of those terrifying setups for like a horror movie.
You like get in a baseball field late at night.
It's who's that?
That's the Johnson's like seven generations of old people.
Ray in that fucking field down.
They refuse to breed outside the grass.
Exactly.
All their hair is perfect.
I don't know if you know, you're not a i don't think
you're a baseball guy i'm not either sort of i watched this video like like about the lawn mowing
thing did you know that in baseball they like these lawn mowing families they'll do things like
like the the gm or whatever will be like hey we're playing the astros and then the grass mowing
family will be like the astros okay Okay. They like to steal bases.
They like to do this and that.
We're going to put extra water on the infield.
We're going to make the outfield slower.
And it's like,
I was blown away by that.
I didn't know that's how it worked.
It's games been shipped to the top level.
I love when you get to see like the behind the scenes of how people really
like,
like the level of when you hear about F1,
it's like,
yo,
we reduced the tire pressure by 0.01%,
and that is going to get us around the corner this much faster.
It's a game of like millimeters.
It's so much more fun, though, when you learn about it from sports like baseball,
where you're like, dude, it just fucking hit the ball harder.
I don't understand.
Like how is mowing the grass like a quarter inch higher going to change the game?
Bet you it has.
What they'll do specifically,, if you've got a pitcher
who produces a lot of ground balls,
he throws a lot of off-speed stuff,
a lot of ranking stuff,
and he's a ground ball pitcher.
His goal is to get you
to hit a ground ball
to one of his great infielders.
They fucking get you out.
He's not going to blow heat past you
and have Ks lined up on the board.
A way to help him is,
like Taylor said,
making the infield slower, making those balls lay down and that's by just hit it with a hose hit with
a hose before the game now it's kind of wet and soggy and that when the ball hits that grass
instead of like ricocheting and bouncing hard like a like it's a tennis um uh surface it sogs down a
little it squishes in slows down easier to scoop up, and get that guy out.
A lot less rockets going up through the middle.
Little choppers going over the pitcher's head.
Stuff like that.
You probably seen where you hit the ball.
It hits right in front of the batter.
But it chops over everybody's head in the infield.
He makes it.
That ain't happening either.
There's lots of ways to make things a little bit harder.
And it's the long game, right?
Probably won't matter today.
But if we do it every fucking game that we play,
we're going to win an extra few games.
And that might be the difference between a championship and not.
You're moneyballing it.
180 games.
Yeah, or 160 games.
Like one of these, it might matter.
It might.
This year, like Braves were it was down to the last
game or two they fucking came back and won do you think that uh do you like i mean i know you guys
are ufc fans and taylor you're a hockey fan maybe more applicable in hockey but like because ufc is
pretty they kind of do a good job of making sure we don't have this but like do you like the
shithousery that sports has sometimes where people are just
like,
you're like,
that's just like,
I think the,
uh,
university of Miami or not university,
Miami,
Florida,
um,
the football team puts the opposing bench in the sun on the other side of
the field.
So it's 30 degrees hotter on their bench in the summer than it is on the
Miami dolphins side.
Like that's great shithousery.
It's like not about the game,
but it is it happened
this year with the Vikings um I think I was hearing the second hand from Middy Middy was like
some kind of horseshit is happening because our bench is 108 degrees and theirs is 87 all right
they've got the heat turned on and they're blasting they didn't know what it was like
the temperature's wrong,
but it was like significant enough that fuckery was about.
Yeah.
Like,
yeah.
Like,
I think there's not a temperature variance in this,
in this building like that.
In hockey,
the,
the new,
I think it's the New York Islanders.
So,
you know,
obviously there's a goalie and a backup goalie and in every single bench in
the entire league,
the backup goalie sits with the team so that he can like be part of the team and like, see what's going on, get instruction from the coach. Hey, you might have to go in the entire league, the backup goalie sits with the team so that he can be part of the team
and see what's going on, get instruction from the coach.
Hey, you might have to go in a bit, bud. He's sucking
out there. The Islanders are the only team
and it's only on the away bench that
the backup goalie
has to sit by himself
in a separate box alone.
And so they'll be like, there's the
hurricanes, there's the team
and they'll be like, and the you know hurricanes you know there's the team and they'll be like and there's the backup goalie and it's just like he's sitting by himself like you can
see people around behind him that's got to be horrible like you're sitting there by yourself
and you're like for both please please don't let too many goals in man i'm not ready i'm
no it's just the away team that's good that's what i'm talking about
about that i think it's the islanders yeah because because i'll say this in baseball you can't just
put the bullpen in the parking lot so no no you can change you can change the field what the
fuck is the green monster they just said build a 40 foot wall and then the other one's like take
the right like field and make it 30 feet closer like it like
baseball is i mean i know that's a little bit more like hey we got this plot of land kind of thing
but my favorite version and since that is the world cup is the confederation that the u.s plays
in is so diverse that you can have teams from honduras who are playing in like a hundred degree, 90% humidity,
literal,
like the jungle on a shitty turf,
like,
like awful grass field.
And then three days later,
they have to play up in negative 20 Edmonton,
Canada to qualify.
And it's like the most shit housery I've ever seen.
But it's so funny.
They're like,
I've never seen snow before.
It is actually colder than I've ever thought possible.
You're like from Honduras.
Go play.
And then like, I mean, the Canadian team has to be like,
yeah, this could go well.
Yeah.
That's what they do for the U.S.
The U.S. team, the U.S. refuses to play soccer in L.A. or Miami. they only play in like ohio or minnesota or uh boston
because it's so far away from like a like a like an immigrant population they know damn well if it
was us versus like the philippines and la the entire stadium is filipino people like it doesn't
matter like there's just we ain't got that kind of fandom yet so so keep it away in the world cup you would do it yeah super into it big fan watched a lot of the
games so america's advancing right it's a loss and argentina's advancing right argentina's advancing
uh they play australia who advanced um surprisingly so it should be a walk in the park for uh
argentina who's your non-American pick?
And I should say
favorite, not pick. Not prediction.
Who am I rooting for?
Japan. I gotta root for
Japan because they beat Spain, who is a
longtime favorite, and they knocked out Germany.
They beat Germany as well.
And so these, you know,
Japan's been playing a lot of
very interesting, fun soccer.
And they've been like aggressive.
I hate watching boring soccer.
It's not fun.
So you don't like soccer.
Wait, you said you did.
No, I.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Who's your outside of America like pick?
Like who's going to win Brazil?
Probably France is also fantastic.
I mean, they have.
I don't know why I's specified outside of America.
Well, you know, United States, number one,
we just got to beat Netherlands and Argentina
and probably France, but otherwise we're good.
Yeah, no, I mean, the U.S. playing Netherlands,
they have a really good chance of winning,
better than they did for pretty much any other matchup.
I don't think they will win, but they could, and that's cool.
Is that their next game?
Yeah, that's the... Is that their next game? Yeah.
Is it single elimination now?
Single elimination.
That's 10 a.m. Eastern on Saturday,
so I'll be up at 6 to watch that.
What if we tie?
Are we out?
No, tie goes to extra time and then penalties.
So I think a dream,
outside of the U.S. winning in regulation,
a dream and more realistic way of advancing
is we go the entire 90 plus 120 minutes or whatever and. winning in regulation. A dream and more realistic way of advancing is we go the entire
90 plus 120 minutes
or whatever and then win in penalties
because
anybody can win.
It's the World Cup. I mean
Germany, Italy
didn't even make it and they won
a World Cup, the last World Cup
Italy didn't even make it?
No, they didn't make back-to-back ones and they won the Euros, which was like essentially winning the light World Cup, the last World Cup. Italy didn't even make it? No, they didn't make back-to-back ones, and they won the
Euros, which was like essentially
winning the light World Cup. So it's
like, okay, Germany getting eliminated for
the group stages. They won it four times
and they didn't even make it out. And then Belgium
was the second best team according to ratings
and they didn't make it out of the group stage.
So it's like, alright. Do you think anything bad
happened to any of those Iranian
players? I think those Iranian players?
I think the Iranian players are going to rightfully be scared because there were Iranian citizens getting shot for celebrating the fact that Iran lost.
That ain't some good stuff.
So I remember back in the day stories of Saddam Hussein, and I don't remember sport that that he picked you know a lot of times dictators will have one there's but i do remember something about the players
being thrown into a pool of acid um for losing well i don't i don't mean the kind of pool of
acid where they're like instantly boiled alive i mean like a punishment we're gonna burn you a
little uh i don't i don't it. You wouldn't do that.
You're just going to magically find better soccer players out of the same country next year?
Listen, it's different.
You don't acid them to death, Taylor.
You acid them to the run and they're going to be smooth.
Listen, we're talking about Iran here.
We're not talking about Qatar.
Qatar might actually kill every one of their players
and nobody would know because I don't know any of their players
and nine of them play for the same
Qatari team.
They are the worst host nation in the world or ever in world cup history.
Thank God they scored a goal.
Cause they would be the worst ever in that regard.
They're the first to never not win a game.
It was just like,
they don't deserve to be on the field.
However,
the Iranian team,
very good.
The Iranian team would has players that are internationally
known they are not a pushover and i was saying they're 20th rated in the world i've been saying
for a while like they're pretty they're not bad they were better than whales just by comparison
i think we are technically 16th i think that realistically we're closer to 14 if we're playing
good but it doesn't fucking matter because it's a World Cup. Anybody's going to lose. Morocco is like 50th, and they won their group.
Was it a big...
I had in my head, like, there was a big upset that we beat Iran.
Or was it not really?
No, no, we should have beaten Iran.
In my head, it was a huge victory, just knowing nothing.
Every time we beat another team in soccer, I'm like...
It's great to watch Iran lose.
England beat Iran 6-2.
I woke up at 5 in the morning to watch that game and went to bed at halftime because they were up four
i was like dude i appreciate that kind of fandom so much i think that's like um there was a a few
ufc cards ago it was in uh where was abu dhabi abu dhabi yeah and i was like same thing let's
set my alarm uh fights kick off at a crack of 1030 a.m.
They don't stop until four in the afternoon.
See, that's way different.
I don't mind that.
But the games start at 2 a.m.
during the group stages here.
I didn't watch any 2 a.m. games.
But like it is pretty rough to think to your East Coast is way better.
It started at 5 a.m., I guess.
And then it ends at like, you know, 5 p.m.
So I'm just glad we're now moving past that.
It's 7 a.m. and 11 a.m. games now for me.
Yeah, 2 a.m., 3 a.m.
That obviously doesn't work for anybody.
But I honestly didn't mind starting the card off with like coffee and scramble eggs.
Right?
Yeah, that's me and football.
Every Sunday is 10 a.m.
Usually I've got my gross popcorn and I'm it right yeah that's me in football every sunday is 10 a.m usually i've got my uh my gross popcorn and and i'm watching it with that but i was like yeah we're gonna start
breakfast off with some blood and guts and then sure enough like like they do such a good job
anybody who wants to like get into the ufc but you you think it's horse shit that you've got to pay
so goddamn much for it you're absolutely right just don't pay the first of all don't pay but but you can get even the free fights the early prelims the people on the early prelims are
warriors all right they got stuff to prove not that everybody doesn't but my i would bet you
good money that a substantial number of the people on the early prelims if they win their fight that
night they're breaking even or losing money still on what the preparation travel
and everything took to get them to the show and give them that shot of being
the next insert name here.
Right?
Like,
like they're it's,
it's all or nothing for these guys.
So when they go out there,
they're fucking,
there's no draws.
There's no hugs outs.
No,
they're fucking dogs.
They get in there and they go and
you see some real violent like crazy ko's because these guys don't have anything to lose they've got
everything to gain so they're coming across that mat ready to kill they get over there and they
start throwing right away and i agree with kyle what makes a fight interesting are the stakes
and how aggressive the fighters are those are the things i really like and the stakes
can mean a championship belt that means a lot to me but the stakes can also mean this is my debut
and i'm trying to make some noise here or shit i've just lost two fights if i lose three i'm
about to get cut like those stakes can make a fight just as interesting as a title fight
and and oftentimes there's that fight where it's like, this is it.
You win this one, you're in that GOAT conversation now.
You win this one, you've got – Usman has had one.
He lost it.
He was about to have the most title defenses in UFC history.
Knock the fuck out.
That was your moment, dude.
You were about to be in the top four for the GOAT conversation.
Way ahead on the scorecards too.
Way ahead on the scorecards. All. Way ahead on the scorecards.
All you had to do was do this instead of that.
That's literally it.
Yeah.
I was about to say.
Easy to say sitting here.
You know, like, I would have just gone totally defense.
No, Woody, you would have done whatever your opponent wanted you to.
You have no defense.
You don't belong there at all.
I'm imagining me in his body with his brain
don't you understand and my and my foresight
my hindsight your hindsight yeah i'm quite the super being when i put myself together like that
yeah about uh the the world cup yeah i want because tucker i know you're a soccer expert our audience knows
i've always given a fair shake to soccer i've never come down on him too hard every time never
right and i want to know like what is the explanation for for flopping like what is the
soccer rationale for it as a yes yeah okay As a player of the sport,
as an enjoyer and competitor for a while,
not for 10 years, I hated it.
And I still do because it doesn't matter in basketball
or literally any sport,
I hate the idea of gamesmanship
in the way that you're going to fall down
in an area where you shouldn't.
If you get crushed and it's a foul, great.
Like, that's fine.
I have no problem with people intentionally fouling or whatever,
but I hate the gamesmanship.
And for whatever reason,
it is now baked into the idea of a lot of teams culturally
that that is how you're supposed to play
in order to gain the affection of the ref or whatever.
Like, get them to say, like, hey, man, if it hurts so bad or if you actually got fouled, why didn't you go down?
Because that's like a real thing.
Stuff.
But like some teams do it more than others.
I fucking hate it, though.
Specifically, African nation and South American, Central American nations are the biggest shithousery like fucking time wasters.
It's so bad.
And it's like Neymar, one of the most prolific
and greatest players
of pretty much a generation of
Brazilians is like well known for the
gifs you've seen where he gets fouled and rolls
seven times. Just like stop.
But like no excuse. I don't know.
Like I'm not going to defend that. It's frustrating.
And I hate anything that takes away from people just playing the game yeah yeah i like your explanation like
why don't enforce what because it's look at the instant replay and for example now now they have
instant replay it's called var but they can't they it's not really it's to review the severity
of a penalty and oftentimes say hey whoa this was a scoring opportunity and a severe penalty let's
make sure we didn't miss something it's not really like a hey we were way too harsh on you let's walk
it back here so the penalties that are caught that are causing this are not few are not often
so i i've seen um times where like like my hand barely brushed your ear and you act as if it was
a knockout and you're on
the ground you're trying to regain your consciousness they could look at that video
and say ah you know what jericho red card so yes they can technically speaking right the uh the the
like there's a you get a card for embellishing a foul or like you know doing that it's hard to
judge that because in real time
it is often like you know hey a bang bang thing even if it looks like you brushed your your arm
against me if we're full on sprinting and i trip up and fall hard for me to tell the force of which
you do that if you want to go back and review all that it breaks the flow of the game the one good
thing about soccer it's fucking 45 minutes nonstop. No commercials, like whatever. The more times that you take away from that, the worse the game goes
because it's supposed to flow in general from start to finish.
And there should be a clear like flow of like tide of momentum and stuff like that.
It's not really like football.
Don't they frequently stop the game and give those cards?
But that takes the longest amount of time that is spent is frequently when
somebody is injured and they're waiting to ham it up.
And then they,
but they use,
that's a dual edge thing.
It's kind of,
since there's no timeouts,
especially in a hotter game,
you maybe get a cramp or something.
A lot of the time,
the players go down like I'm cramping.
You can't tell people to stop cramping,
even if they're hamming it up.
You know,
how many,
how many flops would you say there are a game? since uh if a if a african nation team is up by one goal in a knockout game of
world cup the last 20 minutes i've said this before the last 20 minutes don't even get played
like okay so here's my point then you made the argument that flopping allows the game to
that excuse me you made the point that flopping allows the game to –
excuse me, you made the point that if we were to stop
and look at these with instant replay.
Right, it would allow the game to –
We'd slow this game down, and we need this flow.
But you just told me that flopping is so prevalent that it stops the game.
If we had an instant replay, there would be almost no flopping.
But then you become – yes and no. I think that it would stop a lot of the stuff, but then you become yes and no i think that it would stop
a lot of the stuff but then you end up becoming hey mr referee i need you to be the judge and
executioner to what is in potentially is in a medical um situation it doesn't mean right right
but the nfl these people are the nfl is there's built-in breaks right so let's say a player goes
down like ah i'm hurt right most of time, they're not fucking faking.
I think I saw a player actually go down
in the Green Bay game to bait for time
or something like that.
I've seen that, yeah.
Right, right?
That's hard to do because cameras everywhere.
We have no shame in taking 40 minutes
to review a call in the NFL.
That's not a problem.
We do have a problem in soccer.
Right, you know what I mean.
But they're changing it specifically for this World Cup cup they've done a good job adding the time
necessary at the end of the game we've had plus like 15 minutes at the end of a half that's insane
but it sounds like the worst case scenario is occasionally someone gets penalized for being
dehydrated and to me that sounds like all right in the future we need to uh plan ahead and have
some hey pedro you don't get to run as many minutes it turns out a human being needs water
so hydrate because they're not gonna let it slide it's uh it's kind of like why do we still allow a
man behind the plate to call balls and strikes when we can tell every time exactly when it's in
there here's what i want here's what i want i want him to change the rule but not tell the umpires i don't i don't want you know you know i'd watch baseball treat like
quiet quitting we're like we're like like they don't tell the umps like like like for and until
they figure out on their own they're just like and mark goddard thought that uh that was a strike
when clearly we're gonna see it was a ball. We're going to mark it as a ball,
but allow him to do his little silly dance and point.
Look how confused he is.
The runner took the base.
It's like, welcome to FanDuel.
Everybody's betting on the ratio of percentage,
like correct calls that you got,
like the plus or minus for umpire Marcus.
And like, I would love it if there was just,
um,
a safety measure that they had,
they had the laser strike zone,
however you want to do it.
They're fully capable of having a three dimensional,
perfect strike zone as the rules lay it out to be.
And,
and,
and they have that.
And then they,
let's grade these arms.
You want the traditional game?
Let's see how good the traditional ump is.
And if he falls below,
let's make it like
high school 70 percent uh-oh guess what you old fat fuck who probably couldn't play ball in the
50s either you're done you're fucking done the rest aren't that bad the umpires they're awful
they're awful they're not right 95 of the time no no well first of all there's this instance where
the strike zone is different from game to game and from man to man.
It is like my strike zone will be different from it.
It should be.
No, no, no.
It should be.
But it should be different from person to person.
But it should not be batter to batter, but not right from from umpire to umpire.
If there were three umpires standing together, they should all come up with the same calls because three batters will have different batter.
I'm not a baseball guy, but the strike zone is armpits to knees, right?
Yeah, knees to...
But it's vague. How close to the knees?
What if you got long knees?
Like, who knows?
I don't even know.
That was on the lower bit of the knee.
I could be wrong about this, but my understanding was
it was from the bottom of the letters on the uniform,
like here,
to the top of the
knee. And obviously, if you have a short guy, of the letters on the uniform like like like here to the the top of the um the the the knee
and obviously if you have a short guy he's hard to pitch to that's how the rules work but there's
a three-dimensional strike zone you don't have to just go through a box yeah it's where the ball
ends up it's like if you have a breaking ball it starts high middle framing and letters on your
chest i really feel like phillies hire me i'm gonna redesign your uniforms and put your
fucking letters on your dick the strike zone he ain't got letters every ball is a ball
has there ever been in baseball professional baseball a redo where like the umpire did not know if it was a,
and they redid it. I love prior.
Okay.
So I can tell you too close to call.
Let's fire that one back.
Like a hundred percent.
When I forgot whether it was a ball or strike umpiring major league,
I made them rethrow the pitch.
Yes.
One time I was like,
guys,
I just,
anybody know,
no counts back to three and one,
throw it.
Oh, just do both. You you'll uh you know you'll often
i don't know how many i've only seen it done with a check swing but you know like i check my swing
i pull it back i i haven't i haven't come all the way around the umpire behind me might say
but i can be like i can appeal to the first base umpire and he's always watching that he's got the
good angle right he can see the head of the bat swinging around i'd go to third if i was a lefty and he can give the the superior
i can be like no he's safe he didn't go around and that's and we're good like what do you mean
go around he didn't move the bat he didn't he didn't get halfway through the swing when you
when your wrists start to turn his bat didn't go too far forward you can you can start your swing because
you need to be ready but if he's like oh it's a ball and i can't hit that that's a breaking pitch
i don't want that you back off you don't you don't go all the way around you haven't swung the bat
it's not a strike you didn't hit you didn't swing at the ball but it's hard and sometimes guys are
like go too far around and try to yank it back and there's if a man standing behind you it's
not a great angle to tell if you went too far forward with
something that guy at first base if he's watching and he is he knows okay you appeal to him in that
instance but yeah baseball seems like the most natural like put a computer in charge of that
because someone sliding into a base can or someone placing a tag um is just such a big moment right is this inning over or is this a blowout now
that's what it comes down to sometimes it's it's i wish that there was a lot of replay i don't mind
replay i don't mind it slowing games down i want the i want to see the bang bang play we already
get to see if there is a technique if i have been, from my seat, tell whether it's a safe or an out without, like, you know,
for the past, like, five years, then I know damn well you can do it at home.
And what's frustrating is not even, like,
I don't think you need to put sensors in the ball.
I think that will change the way the ball plays, whatever.
Right? No.
But I know for a fact we have a better way of figuring out
if that ball crossed the line of the goal line in football.
Oh, absolutely.
There's literally no way we can get more cameras involved.
Like, why is all of them?
Like, I are.
Have you watched?
You've watched baseball, like, recently.
They have a top-down, slow-mo, HD fucking IMAX camera.
Or James Cameron is in the sky getting that shit done.
fucking imax camera or james cameron is in the sky getting that shit done you see the ball rotating as it goes across the plate and you're like that's a dirty one huh oh look a fingerprint
yeah they can tell balls and strikes and they can do it lickety split better than that old
cocksucker who's collecting a check yeah it's just for the sport love of the game i hate umpires i
hate umpires i I hate umpires.
I just want to be right.
I don't want there to be inconsistency.
Whatever right is, do that.
What would you need umpires for still if they made computers for the pitch?
You'd still need it.
You wouldn't need it for safe or out, right?
You got grown men out there
playing against each other in a sport.
They're keeping the peace
and they're keeping the game moving as it goes.
They're handling the timeouts.
And even baseball fights.
And they're still making the calls.
They're just getting corrected.
I don't think they should be calling strikes and balls.
They should still be back there, I think, probably, if I'm being honest, like doing their thing.
But when they're wrong, it goes, bing!
Oh, man, I'm looking dumb.
Shit. Like, imagine that if he had to stand out there and get corrected oh that's the umpire paddler and
then they oh he's gotta get beat punish him yeah he shouldn't get paid if he can't hit 70
like for real that would be that would be funny taylor's idea is better paddling yeah
you have whoever the fucking mascot of the stadium is yeah you have the philly
paddle the empire for getting and the philly's frenetic is taking chase oh look at bob run again
look at bob not good are they he's 81 catcher for the orioles all through the 80s blew those
knees out and the fanatic is making quick work of him. Oh! Every mascot looks like John Cena.
Baseball would be the best sport in the world to be, like, super into.
For it to be, like, your sport.
So much data.
Because it is nonstop data.
Yeah, good point.
And content.
Like, imagine being a big baseball fan.
He's like, I love the Cardinals.
You get to watch 160 games,
and that's just your game.
And they're all four hours.
And they're all four.
I said this.
Baseball is the perfect sport for everybody
who works a job where most of it is like
staring at a parking lot.
You're loving baseball season.
I mean, there's just people.
It's like sports podcasting. Just like literally halfway through, they're like, and the 3-'s just people it's like old it's sports podcasting
just like literally halfway through they're like and the three two pitch it's a foul
seven minutes into this at bat i'm gonna get a turkey dog i've never had one before what do
you think about that john he's like i went to philly in 96 i'm gonna be honest steve i'm drunk
you're so right i just realized what I when I think back about like loving
baseball I'm thinking about those summers growing up listening to it on the radio like all through
the evening while we were working or like hunting or like doing something in between and it is like
that you know they call the game but they're also just, I don't know about that guy. Yeah, look at that fellow in the stands there.
Is that a banana?
No, no, it's Big Bird.
He's dressed as Big Bird.
Oh, and look, Marquise Grissom's going over to give him a handshake.
Yeah, what a good guy.
You know, Marquise is doing some charity work
down in the Dominican Republic in the offseason.
Oh, really?
Yeah, yeah.
For one-handed children, it's a terrible thing down there, the
cocoa farming. Chop the hands right off.
Yeah, they do.
All right, 3-2.
Get out for the 3-2 pitch.
Back to the game of baseball.
Actually, the game's been
going while we've been talking. We figured you wouldn't
mind if we just kept it.
Yeah, baseball would be the best football like it's almost double-edged sword with football
i don't care about the nfl but like i think the reason everybody's so fanatical about the nfl
who's into it is because every single game means something like there's no bullshit games in
football from from what i can tell there, what, 16 games in a year?
Everything matters.
Like the end of the season, people's records are like 14 and 2 or like 7 and 7, whereas baseball, it's like 101 and 59 or whatever.
I don't watch a lot.
I think I've watched two games this year.
But my friends are Cowboys fans, fan and viking fan if i'm
not they're correct i think that's all the those are all nfc teams though right couldn't tell i'm
almost positive they are list them again eagles vikings and cowboys all the nfc yeah yeah yeah
so like who's coming out of the afc this because? Because the NFC's got to be one of those.
I think the Bills are the top-rated team, I think.
Oh, so it's going to be some heartbreak.
Okay, so who do the Bills lose to?
Here's a better question.
Who would it be more hurtful for the Bills to lose to this year?
The Eagles, right?
Kansas City Chiefs are the best team in AFC.
For Philly to go to New York and deny them again?
I like that.
I like that. I like that.
So that's the Super Bowl.
I just called it.
Philadelphia Eagles beat the Buffalo Bills by a score or less.
The Buffalo Bills are 8-3, and the Kansas City Chiefs are 9-2.
That's what makes it hurt the most.
So based on 9 being a higher number than 8, I'm going to predict that it's Kansas City.
Are you sure 9's higher than eight i know that nine and two is better than eight and three by at
least one win at least one and the percentage b minus for c block do the bills play in a stadium
or outdoor i don't know i bet they're outdoors. This makes sense. Outdoors, excellent. So I like them going into the winter months.
You know what I mean?
It'd be like if we were going to South America to play football
and we were sending LSU, Alabama, and Georgia,
and all of a sudden Michigan snuck in.
You'd be like, guys.
You got your Camelbacks, right?
Green Bay used to have that advantage all the time.
They call it the frozen tundra where
they play and it's just brutal to play at green bay they would win a lot even if they weren't the
better team that can't be fun for the players though who fucking cares those those prima donna
millionaires get out there in the snow bitch i love bad weather games i love bad weather games
and any sport that will i'm game because it's too rainy.
Oh, your driver's going to have to really clean up the mess when you get out of the backseat tonight, aren't they, sir?
You're going to be drenched.
Fuck those assholes.
No, get out there in that mud and muck like every...
I saw the thing the other day and it was comparing a girl's like a twitter employee's day to this oil rig worker and he he had the job where you're at the top of the pipe and you're like muscling a pipe and pulling it out of the way and then putting like this manticle around another
that like locks it in place and every step i've seen that so many times he's got a little bit of
a belly but and he's i i think he's prime physical fitness for what he's doing yeah
what is that hockey player what did he say i'm chubby but effective he's chubby but that's fuel
because i bet there's days where he doesn't get a lunch it's right there motherfucker and he's
musc he's shirtless muscling this thing that weighs more than him around and he's fucking
working it and he doesn't ever stop it's fluid he never slows or stops because it does the work
it's not stopping and she's just like first i like to start with a smoothie
this is when i do my constant my like uh my yoga and it was just like my meditation after another
thing of my meditation yeah yeah after that i eat lunch no that's how i use a a relaxation pod i will
watch a bad weather game of a sport i don't give a fuck about if you tell me that that they're
gonna have a figure skating match but we left the heat on last night dude i mean the front row let
me see i'd like to watch it curling in like a real snowstorm.
Just have it calm down.
Okay, everyone.
Outside onto the ice.
Oh, Hans, a nice coat.
You leave that behind.
My coat?
Yes, Hans. None of you will need your coats today.
Strip!
There's been one
bad weather outdoor hockey game like ever and it was i remember
because me and midi were talking while it was happening it was the blues versus the minnesota
wild we smashed them uh six to four but it was they had to put heaters under the ice surface
because it was minus six degrees and it was too cold. The ice was too hard and cold.
And so they're like, yeah, they almost had to delay the game because apparently they put a bunch of heaters under the ice so that it softens enough to skate on.
It's like, yeah, I never heard of ice.
It's too cold.
What happens?
I guess it chips or something like it doesn't.
You probably know this, but like the way and I see you're muted, doctor.
You're not coming in.
Sorry, guys.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Am I muted?
No, you're not. I was muted.
I was going to say, you guys probably know this,
but the way an ice skate works is like the leading edge is melting the ice
and you are gliding on that tiny little pool of water in that divot.
So if it's too cold to do that, I bet it makes it hard to skate.
You can't turn or do shit.
You just slide off and it's like not yet.
You can't turn. It's the same.
You can kind of understand it like if you've ever skied or snowboard
and it's super icy out or really cold.
And it's just like way harder to turn, way less fun to turn.
You're not able to carve.
You're just like, you know.
The players were miserable.
They'd like pan to the bench and they're hockey players,
so they all have beards.
And they're just frozen.
Like they're like Jack Nicholson at the end of the shining,
just absolutely frozen.
They get off the ice after being a professional athlete and then like sit in front of a space heater.
Horrible.
Can I talk about this thing I linked over here?
So there's two things.
One is a video of Kanye that obviously we can't play,
but if you haven't seen it,
it's he holds up something.
I can't tell.
It's a little Twitter video or whatever.
He holds up an object, and he argues with it like it is the Jewish people.
A little Clint Eastwood action, huh?
Yes.
And the object is like, I'm going to take your family away and all your money and your career,
and I'm going to make everybody hate you.
And then you're going to have to go on Alex Jones and wear a mask.
It's like all this crazy shit he's saying.
And then he's like arguing with whatever that silly object he's holding is.
And then the second link there is just a really funny picture.
And we can show that one, I guess.
So what's your takeaway on this guy?
What are you reading into this?
This guy's... All right, so I'll read it for those.
What am I missing here?
It says, my son Christian blank got his graduation pictures
after graduating from the South Texas two-minute men,
second-minute men militia training school.
I'm going to read it that way.
Congrats, Christian.
Proud mama.
Hashtag we are patriots.
So what this is, he quote unquote graduated from a made up thing.
The second Texas, he went to like a militia,
like some good old boys somewhere who have rifles and they train and they
have a chain of command, if you will.
And he has. No, no, no no they're real bucks yeah no they're real but like what it's like getting like an
itt tech degree it's like well do you want to join the taylor militia it's a real group it'll
be two grand so like yeah i i can't tell if if what that is is. And I'm dying. I can see. I zoomed in and Zach's right.
There's shotgun shells.
Give me some more.
Give me some more.
Some more.
Give me some more.
Enhance.
Do you see the,
the,
I don't know what the buck.
I'm like 99% sure that the brass.
No,
look at the silver part under the magazine,
under the shotgun shells.
For sure.
I,
I,
you tell me he can't shoot shotgun shells out of
that yeah well you know um not so yet you guys can't but he's been trained by the second militia
so oh yeah i wonder what i wonder what the difference is what those two red ones are
versus the white ones like is that is but the and he got some slugs over there he's got some
slugs in the red they're like they're like you know slugs in the red one he's got some slugs over there. He's got some slugs in the red. They're like slugs in the red one.
He's got the P20 whatever.
I put my flair.
See, I'm a little different.
I put my flares on the left side.
Yeah, yeah.
He's probably trained in the new school, though,
because I've been out of the game for a little while.
I noticed if you look in the background,
he's also got a nifty tomahawk for those close encounters.
It's a tactical hatchet, and it's appropriate.
With liberals and immigrants.
That guy's got...
How would he...
I wish we had an actual soldier, because it's my impression this guy would be terrible as a soldier.
I think fighting in a war actually involves lots of marching, lots of hauling shit in the heat and the cold traveling distances
with weight this guy passed the the fitness test for the army um i bet my i bet my uh my my the
people who know would back me up on this this guy can't pass the military's like physical test any
of the military's physical tests for for like a man's getting there. He looks like he's like early mid-30s
and he's just like 50,
60, 70 pounds overweight at least.
Oh, you are being
terrible. Sorry, I looked to the right
because up until now I hadn't looked at his girth.
This is a morbidly obese
Shrek-looking motherfucker
who couldn't pull off a
mag change and a pinch
if his life depended on it, which it would.
And I just, you know,
this is embarrassing. Maybe a mag change, but
certainly not a five mile march.
No, or like
from the outside looking in, a big part of what
the military is about is like
getting rid of like the
decision making process and learning
what the program is.
So that when
this happens you do that so that you stop react you stop thinking and start reacting based on
your training i guess but but this guy's not a soldier so even comparing him to anything like
that's goofball like right he's wearing a cowboy hat that's how you know he's fucking serious he's
part of the militia like i would bet you $5,000 that that man does not have
all of his hair.
I'm not touching that bit.
How about this?
What do you think that smile
is looking like?
You think this is
I'm serious about being a militia,
a minute man, or
I spent my dental money on guns?
Do you think his mother drank during
pregnancy, that proud
mom? Because his eyes are close
together, and his eyelids look a little funky,
and he's got a mustache, so I can't tell,
but I'm worried he doesn't have one of these.
I think it's called a...
That sounds like
the most rare insult.
It's the tip of your penis.
It's the old drum.
I mix them up all the time. You're on the bottom. Fred, yeah.
I mix them up all the time.
This boy ain't even got a philtrum.
They're made the same thing.
And they're shaped similarly.
You see my condition.
They do have a lot in common.
I stand by that.
He definitely has a philtrum.
You can see it.
Yeah, I see it too.
I don't think that he's a fetal alcohol.
And you know, like having a small head is a sign of FAS.
Oh, well, he's in the clear.
He's in the winning column.
That is a 12 and a half
gallon hat at least. That motherfucker
is a jug head and a half.
Makes him so fat.
Do you think he hydrates with soda?
Beer, beer, beer.
Corn syrup seems to be the likely cause.
It's fried food and beer.
I bet fried food is the bulk of this. Fried fish,
fried chicken. Oh, beer's so easy to lay it on if he drinks a 12 beer you're probably right he does
a 12 pack a day we've ridiculed him enough i'm done i'm just warming up i really liked i want
to get my photo taken like that it was very kind of like better called solly like you know like the
flag behind you and then a juxtaposed version of
you like looking and he's flexed by his thing with a very lame i think we've come up with an
idea to replace this dated fucking call of duty thing yeah just be in front of me we should all
i mean if you can just get photos of yourself in military attire we should all do it oh you should
all get a photo shoot except like this guy didn't go far enough.
He's saying he's in the fucking, you know, mountain militia.
Wait, what was the thing called again? I'm going to say I'm in the Marines.
I'm going to look it up.
I want to see what their program is.
Yeah, what was the program?
South Texas.
South Texas.
It is the South Texas Two-Minute Man Militia Training School.
I'm taking it as the second Minute Man Militia Training School.
South Texas.
All right, so I think I might be on a list
because I get something from 2005.
Groups in Texas and California
imitate nativist extremist minute man
anti-immigration project.
This is so long ago.
There's no way this guy was a part of this group in 2005.
He's not alone.
The militia movement.
U.S. militia.
I was hoping it'd be funny and they'd have something where it's like,
you must be a true patriot.
You must have your own guns.
You must bring snacks every other week.
Every other week?
Did you not see his picture?
Well, you trade off.
Yeah, you're right.
You must bring snacks every day i want to replace those shotgun shells with snickers minis yeah we have an
interesting membership program it's mostly haribo's no money just our sugar-free kind
those are the kind that are shit yourself yeah Yeah. Yeah. I've never had them.
I don't think I would eat a sugar free gummy bear.
If I'm gonna have a gummy bear,
it is,
there's nothing in a gummy bear,
but sugar.
Yeah.
Right.
Like you're not, it's just gelatin and sugar,
man.
Watching these,
we watched,
we talked about that clip of like roughnecks working.
I just looked back over to that tab.
Like when you guys watch this for me,
what I imagine is like myself in that scenario and having like both of my arms torn off by by the torque in like those spinning things.
Like when you guys watch that, are you like, yeah, I could I could do that.
Like I watch them and it's like an elaborate dance where one misstep is like, oh, that pipe that looks like kind of a normal pipe.
Well, it's coming 15 miles an hour at the back of your head and it's made of tungsten like it'll kill you
i think am i a liberal pansy because i feel like there's osha requirements that need to protect
people yeah the hands and arms must get ripped off all the time now i've seen in reddit comments
the most reliable source on the internet that that's not how they do it anymore that now there are machines and it's not just a human wrestling three-ton pipes well these guys are getting that's
not as fun it's weird like safety versus productivity they're they're natural enemies
right like that guy's getting shit done in a hurry i bet the machines that do it
are more expensive and slower yeah it's like uh with any of these like wild out there jobs have
you watched those videos of people climbing those antenna towers yeah those are insane and it's like
20 or 30 grand because they're climbing a mile up vertically with two leads and it's not a question
of like it's the same with the people that have
to service the windmills like uh i know there was that famous photo that went around like probably
a decade ago it's like because when you're up there you die if something goes wrong and like
the turbine caught fire did you say it was 20 or 30 grand for what to climb up to the top of those
one and a half mile long cell towers and change the blinking light at the top. I would do that tomorrow
for 30 grand.
I think that you only need to do it once every three years.
It's like one of those things where it's the same
with the people that are on the power lines
walking, clearing snow
off them or something like that.
I'm sure you would, but
they're not getting paid for fuck all.
Yeah, we're going to send the guy up
instead, Woody, but thanks.
Like we were talking about the ocean thing.
Like you can watch those videos of the guys climbing,
and like the regulations are like every, you know,
you hook in and then you go up and then you unhook and you re-hook
and you go up and it's like, and the people who actually do it,
you watch the videos, they're not hooking on to shit.
They're just climbing, having a sandwich pissing i'm going to die if i get this wrong i might as well die quickly
and very fluidly it seems like they should be able to do that right i can picture this a ladder
next to the ladder there's a pipe you hook on that pipe and every like 20 feet there's a stopper
so just every 20 feet you just switch your hook. Because I think that falling 20
feet regardless on that pipe, that's not
going to be... You are the guy maintaining that
pipe, Woody. They're not sending another guy up there
to be like, well, we changed the light, but go up there
and make sure the pipe is tight up there.
No, no, no. This is welded together
much like the ladder is. This is the
ladder with a safety device that you hook on
and you can never fall more than 20 feet.
On average, you'll fall 10 you sure can i can i just interject that i bet a pipe capable of you know handling
this sort of thing a mile long into the sky adds to like the weight like maybe even like oh now we
got to use the 17 gauge cables you know know, those that like four miles worth of cable that stretches everywhere.
Now it's got to be a bigger gauge.
I bet keeping those things light and it is a big deal.
You're right.
I bet you literally they come in there and they put a paper down there like,
do you see the cost benefit analysis of keeping you alive if anything goes wrong?
Make sure nothing goes wrong.
Hey, could you put a pipe here so I don't have to clamp so much?
Nope.
We will just pay your spouse $35,000 more.
But we're going to put it also at the top of the spire.
She's going to have to go and compete for it.
You signed the paperwork.
There's a new scary movie that's about this.
It's about two girls.
Yeah, I saw this yeah they they
climb up together and then like the ladder breaks they end up like dangling it's one of those movies
that was made with the well we have a premise how do we make money off of it because it's like
and a green screen don't forget the green screen uh did you i can't remember. I wonder. It's pretty recent.
Nobody does it with a base rig.
But it seems like a base jumping rig would add a lot to safety.
Am I crazy?
I would have one. I think that the problem, right, isn't with base jumping that you need to have distance enough.
To fall.
Not to fall, but specifically away from shit, right?
So let's say you lose grip and you fall.
Who cares?
Yeah, you're dead anyways the alternative was flat yeah you're right i guess it doesn't matter if you're not
right side up like you fall from something like you're falling long enough to like have regrets
like breathe in again i should have went back to school there'd be a danger zone right with a base rig
like one the first 200 feet is death and then once you get to 400 you're almost back in the
safety zone now you're jumpable and if you feel yourself falling just push off it'll take 18
seconds to fall a mile 18 seconds like like. That's a YouTube short.
Hey guys, I'm falling to my death. I got about
three more seconds.
18 seconds
to hit terminal velocity
from start. This is
according to Quora.
Terminal velocity
is around 150 miles per hour.
No, assuming initial velocity is zero and the acceleration
of gravity is 32 feet a second,
not taking in wind resistance into account,
whatever, then it's 18.2 seconds.
No, you guys, he's...
So even longer with wind resistance.
Yeah, that's...
I've fallen lots of times,
but I have some element of wind...
No.
But I have some element of wind
that's halfway flying
and it's way longer than 18
seconds like that time well that's a mile supposedly like i don't know how high up those
towers go like the ones i watch on youtube they're i'm guessing like 1200 feet i'm like that for the
tall ones uh is a some real bell tower like yeah how many feet is a mile? Like 5,400 or something?
5,400.
And the one, the cell tower,
I had, it is a cell tower, right?
I had one of those in the back
of my, like, elementary school.
And that, like, it's hard to even put a,
like, a number to how tall it is, right?
Like, I can't just tell you it was 5,400 feet tall.
Well, I just want to know, like,
pick a cell tower. Well well i said how tall is
a cell tower and it says 400 feet and that's not right okay the the kiev tv tower is 1263 feet
so that's like almost that's not that's not even that's not a mile but no no no yeah there are no
mile tall no it's like almost that's like a quarter mile almost a quarter mile right there
are no mile tall towers yeah i'm not saying that almost, that's like a quarter mile, almost a quarter mile, right? There are no mile tall towers.
Yeah, I'm not saying that there is.
I'm just saying that there's like,
I'm saying that like in my head,
it's super tall,
but like that's why
when you said a base rig jump
or whatever,
it's like you probably
don't even have enough time
to get the thing unfurled
before you hit the ground.
Oh, you do.
That's what they're for.
They jump off bridges
and shit with them, you know?
I guess you're right.
Yeah, they jump off towers
all the time.
Actually, the A in base
stands for antenna. One day every six months. It does months does it i'm pretty sure i didn't know that so
base jumping is an acronym yeah cool didn't know that i like to know all the acronyms what does it
mean base barely alive surely be funnier if the word jumping was the one that was the acronym base
i don't know i would never do base jumping that's the one that even the risk takers out there like
woody are like hard pass uh risk reward profile kind of shit no thing building antenna span earth
base okay span is bridge i guess i thought it was because you jumped off a flat surface.
I don't know what I thought it was.
I'm going to keep working on it, but it's a good start.
Building antenna span.
What was the E?
Entertainment.
Shit, I forgot it already.
Energy.
What are the four ancestral tenets?
Building antenna span earth.
That must mean cliff. You don't plan to do any
base jumping do you woody like like no i have a lot of friends that do it and there's just no
second chances i think i've told you this before like i i do acrobatic paragliding and i have a
wing that maybe i can get to work again if i fuck it up and uh two reserve parachutes i've had
accidents where i used both reserve parachutes.
So that was close call.
In base jumping, they have zero reserve parachutes.
They have so little altitude that if the first one doesn't work,
there's no second chances.
It just has to work.
And it's the deployment too.
That shit can really fuck up.
When you get base jump training,
half of it is like how to,
how to fold your parachute really well.
How to reconcile your life.
Yeah.
I guess there's not a lot of training.
There's like,
first of all, guys got on it.
You got to jump.
All right.
And after that,
like,
this is so,
so key.
Everyone pay attention.
Mike,
put the joint down.
You got to pull your chute,ute guy you don't pull it every every single day someone here doesn't pull every single instance something goes wrong they're not pulling
their chute we promise it's just they're forgetting it's hemorrhaging money no return business
it's not merely a base
jump with the pile down there now
you're not getting your deposit back on that shoot
my friend's friend died
recently of base jumping and
well now it's not funny
the guy was really experienced
too he was a
in skydiving he was a tandem guy
and that says two things to to you one he's really
well trained if you if you're taking people on tandem jumps then you do it a lot two uh it says
he gets a lot of jumps right tandem guys can jump like 12 15 times a day or whatever and you ask
your tandem guy how much he's done and they always have like 7 000 12 000 jumps and he still died and it's like that's just
uh well he died base jumping and equipment malfunction like i don't know the specifics
of it oh i do oh no i'm not gonna make a joke but um i don't know it just super sucks and people die
like just healthy people who were alive one day are dead the next
who were fun.
And that's space jumping.
Yeah, that one seems real scary.
It seems like less
of the fun part. And when I imagine
jumping out of something with a parachute, it's the
free fall that seems fun to me.
It's that moment in the Power Rangers movie
when they're all wearing
ski equipment and they're twirling around in the air as they free fall.
I was like, oh, that looks so fun.
It looks like they're floating like there's zero G and it feels like that, too, to them.
So like that seems fun.
So extending that out as much as possible by going higher seems to me like what how you make that more extreme not making the ride shorter or being
able to do it at a moment's notice like yeah yeah when i want to jump i just fucking jump
like yeah i get real high in the air on an airplane so nothing can go wrong yeah you're
in the majority most people find the fall to be the the most fun part i like it after the canopy
goes up it's really noisy sky to have you have you jumped out of an airplane before no no it's
super noisy like
so you're just i guess it'd be like a motorcycle without a helmet like you're just going what 100
miles an hour or something through yeah and uh but once you pull the chute all of a sudden like
there's a little piece you're steering you're under control that i thought that was more fun
but most people agree with you no i i i could see um liking both of them i would think there'd be a
lot of thrill and a lot of like um wonder to the fall and then initially there would be a really
happy moment where it opened up and we're good now i can enjoy the rest i thought it was gonna
hurt more like i've thrown a couple reserve parachutes for either practice or emergency,
like what we call a combat throw.
And a reserve parachute is designed to really quickly start doing parachute shit.
It catches air really well, and it quickly expands and stops you
because you might be at low altitude when you throw it,
and you don't want to fuck around.
A parachute parachute, the kind you might
skydive with they open slowly they start in a little bird's nest and sort of come out and
there's a slider that comes up and helps them hold their form and what that means is that the yank
when you first like decelerate isn't so bad i thought i was like fuck i thought it was going
to be like a reserve parachute from terminal velocity.
I was a little scared of the initial jerk, but it's not bad.
Yeah, that stuff Richard did with the halo jumping.
That has its own scary things.
He went hypoxic.
Halo jumping means from really high.
45,000 feet to 55 is the number that's in my head but gosh
okay i i think i'm five minute free fall i get bored halfway through i'm sorry but you
get on your phone you wear oxygen and i remember a really funny story you know how tom cruise likes
to do his own stunts right he was he was filming the uh mission impossible that has henry cavill
in it uh it's notoriously the one where henry cavill has the mustache and had to be cgi'd out for the superman
film he is the bad guy in that movie but not right away spoiler alert and there's a scene where the
two of them jump out of a airplane together halo jump and tom cruise shows up halo jump ready he's
been training for months or whatever and henry campbell's like what the
fuck you're you're gonna jump with the stunt man who's my height and has bad hair like whatever
it takes tom i want to jump out of this plane and he and henry campbell's like look here's the thing
we can do that we can do it we can put you in that suit we put the helmet on we can throw you
out of that plane but somebody probably dying if you want it'd be somebody that works for somebody would die
trying to save you somebody would die trying to save you and uh and uh whoever tried to save them
would probably die too and maybe people would die trying to save you henry if anything went wrong
that's how things would go and henry was like all right well maybe stuntman then
paint some figurines then yeah yeah because it's like so dangerous if you got hypoxic up there and you
can't now there should be a mechanism that pops your shoot at the correct altitude but i'm sure
that they don't like relying on that for your life um and he had to do stunt work while he was up
there i think it wasn't just a simple jump i think there's twirling and whirling and fighting but tom
cruz did it they let him goddamn right tom cru cruise does all of his own stuff he seems like he seems like a fun
entertainer he's like a real stand-up guy go to church every time tom cruise comes up i like to
state this tom cruise is a fucking weird little fucking man okay he's creepy i bet he knows some
dark shit some criminal shit about torture murder rape and like human slavery in the first world. Well, he is in
Hollywood, yeah. He's a
Scientologist and like that guy's
wife is still missing.
Okay? The guy who runs Scientology.
No one knows where she's been at and
no one will tell you. They throw the police
reports away. Okay? Tom
Cruise knows where that lady went.
But he's an amazing actor and he does all of his
own fucking stunts. He jumps across buildings.
That was him on the side of the, I'm gonna get the
name weird, the Verge
Khalifa.
He's on the side of the world's
real tallest building goofing around out there
like doing it for real. He's
dangling out the side of that C-17
or whatever it was for real. I mean,
he's strapped up. He's not just hanging on by his hand
but he's strapped out there. His next movie's in outer fucking space i didn't i don't mean it's about
outer fucking space i said tom cruise next movie is in outer fucking space because he's gonna go
to space to film it real space he's going to real space is it that's a high budget space
like no that's a super expensive movie He is going to real fucking space
To make a space movie
Is Tom Cruise going to space
For his upcoming
2024 project
Tom Cruise will be going to the ISS
And set to not only be the first to film a movie
In outer space but the first Civ
To ever spacewalk outside the station
That is sick
They may be overstepping there they may be overstepping the
spacewalk thing that's he wants to spacewalk they're not gonna let him let him do it come
on he's already up there cruise it's american royalty they're not gonna yeah he literally
can't like we have to let this 70 year old walk in space although hang on hang on so he'll he um
last i heard like elon musk is like yeah totally we'll
work that out and and so he runs the iss he runs the fucking he runs the iss i thought he said iss
am i wrong yeah yeah yeah but but you don't have to own a house if you have a car you can still
drive up to the bargain lot and yeah you know to do a spacewalk he doesn't need the iss he could
just pop out of the the dragon thing or right he said he was gonna be on the iss i assume they were gonna
use his facilities and tethers and yeah it is unclear whether he'll stroll around outside the
station or if he'll actually enter but they but they're saying that like listen we're putting
them up in that general area but you can't do any inner you can't do any launch without the
government approval so regardless they will they will know he's not going to just show up outside
the iss um i don't know well this is awkward yes look they'll fully like let tom cruise go to the
iss just for because they will like what we're talking about is the spacewalk though like like
that's the scary scary dangerous thing that they don't let like celebrities go up and do is a spacewalk there's only like a handful
of people no no he wouldn't do a real one because if you drift off you die he'd be tethered up like
it would no no a spacewalk is leaving the fucking craft in your suit that is a space where it
doesn't matter if he's tethered or not going out there is is bonkers going out there without him
he wouldn't be by himself they'd be like it doesn't matter if he's tethered or not. Going out there is bonkers. He wouldn't be by himself.
It doesn't matter.
Going into the environment.
It doesn't matter if we're hugging him while he does it.
You're going into a knot.
There was a Russian who had condensation in his suit
because it was humid out, right?
You might think, ah, it's just a little condensation from humidity.
Well, it's settled in the bottom of his suit.
You go into zero G.
He goes on the spacewalk.
It all comes up to his face, flows into his ear
cavities. Now he's completely discombobulated.
It gels over his
eyeballs and starts suffocating
him because it's zero G water
stuck to his face. And he can't
touch his face because it's in a helmet.
He was blind, deaf, and
discombobulated. He got back in
by touch.
Like, like, like,
you're blowing the water.
Hey, Tom, you got to stay on Earth.
All right.
Touche.
Like, I didn't know that happened in space.
Like, imagine like the scariest kind of deep sea diving.
That's what we're talking about, right?
Like, like, it's, it's,
it's something that only a handful of people have ever done for a reason.
Space is less here.
And you know, when you look at like an astronaut's pedigree,
right, remember that Asian fellow
that we're always just like fucking saluting here?
He's like ex-Navy SEAL, astronaut, doctor,
might be an engineer too.
He added something else recently that was noteworthy.
He got like a black belt or something.
He's got too much talent.
Yeah, it's just ridiculous.
Like you gotta be that kind of motherfucker
for them to fly you up there in that rocket
and then let you walk around on their dime.
So then what would it be?
When people die, the whole program loses money.
They don't want more people to go up there.
Imagine Tom Cruise dies in space.
Ruins the space program.
No!
You think it would...
Nah, it just makes it more legit.
When people die, if you look like the times when the space program
slid to a halt every time
something blows up it's like or somebody dies
it's like okay
gotta rewrite the books and
like touch every knob
and shrink it on this thing
it's bullshit I think that
statistically less people have died
going to space than anything else
on this planet, you know?
I think so. Not per capita!
No! No! No!
100%! Listen,
how many people have died
by shark? Hundreds?
How many people have died in space?
Not hundreds. No, no, no, no, no. Here's the thing,
though. Depends if you count. Some of them almost, man.
How many people have gone into the ocean
is on our left hand, and how many people have died from of them almost, man. How many people have gone into the ocean is on our left hand,
and how many people have died from sharks is on our right.
How many people have gone into space is now on our left hand,
and how many astronauts have fucking died is on our right.
I don't know, Kyle.
Whoa, there is so much more space than there are sharks in the ocean.
I don't think that's fair.
I'm fucking with him 1,000%.
I will persist.
I think it's about the same, man.
I think you're going to go to the comments section
and they're going to confirm that I'm right.
They will?
No, they will.
I think we'll have a really smart guy down there.
Yeah, yeah.
If you leave a comment saying Kyle's wrong,
you're probably pretty smart.
You're probably right.
You're probably smart.
You want to make sure you leave lots of comments that say that Taylor is wrong and that I'm
right because would you go to space, Taylor, if you were given a ticket up there?
Would you get in that rocket, get strapped in?
It'd be really scary, but it's one of those things where it's like, this is something
no one ever gets to do.
So I think I'd buck up my buttercup.
I'd be so scared.
And I'd get in there.
I'd be so scared.
Actually,
I would need to go not just with experts.
I would need like a friend of mine also to be there so that we could like
bounce off each other.
Like,
all right,
he's not freaking out.
I'm not going to freak out either.
I bet we're afraid of different things.
I am not afraid of blowing up on the launch pad.
I'm not afraid of the vehicle exploding on reentry
or anything catastrophic.
I am so afraid and so much so
that I'm getting a little claustrophobic
now thinking about being in that tin can
and it goes off course
and the boosters or the rockets
or whatever we use to like,
oh yeah, correct, go back the other way.
For whatever reason, they go haywire and we start spinning now, boosters or the rockets or whatever we use to like oh yeah correct go back the other way for
whatever reason they go haywire and we start spinning now twirling off out of like like into
space or like into a weird funky disappearing or or like you know you're just you're going off on a
bad trajectory if you get slung away like it would be you would have so much time to just know that you are 100% dead.
There are very few times here on earth where you could be in a spot where you
are dead and no one can change it.
It'd be like,
well,
if the Navy really wanted to come here and get me,
they could,
they'd send their best submersible and they would,
they'd fly it here in a jet.
Okay.
You know,
you're right.
They would do that.
But you're in space.
You're in the best thing that they had.
You're it.
Yeah, there's no catching up to you.
It's over.
You're flying faster right now than any man ever has
away from the rest of humanity.
You better hope that radio signal starts going.
I'm hitting that.
I'm like, all right, guys, you've got 18 and a half minutes
of the best podcast I can put up with before I break down.
It's just sobs.
It's just sobs and moans.
No, no, no.
Watch a few YouTube shorts.
Honestly, I've watched a couple videos.
I'm not convinced.
I think if I take my helmet off and I jump out, it explodes.
I'm a scientist.
I'm not sure.
Is that what happens?
Like, how do I do this best no you just open the door and you just get sucked out or maybe
crushed something something bad you're not gonna be okay like it'll end it yeah you get sucked out
you're uh i think your your blood kind of boils because of the zero pressure and you know there's there's gases
infused in it that that are only gaseous at um the pressures that pressure atmosphere
under yeah i think you just boil from the inside and die like your eyes explode it's just awful
i'm trying to think maybe i would just asphyxiate i think that that'd be the better one you know
because that's the other thing your lungs explode yeah no oxygen
jet level low and i'm like sweet god it's just like turning the car on and sitting in there i'll
just go to sleep i think i'll just like space and i'm flying away from civilization faster than any
man has ever traveled yet my radio still works for something i think i'm gonna say
kanye's onto something I like Hitler oh my god just leave that one
why would he say that
why
it's the perfect plan
because then they're like
the ADL is forming a shuttle to retrieve
this anti-semite and bring it to justice
that's not what happened
NASA lost
contact with Mr. Woodworth
earlier this afternoon
before he was able to make his last broadcast.
Eulogizing me,
making me some sort of hero on my way out.
Did I drop that, Bob?
Let's listen to this poor AI-generated
second version of his message.
Wow, this is not that great.
Tell my family I love them.
Donald Trump,
2028. I love them. Donald Trump, 2028.
He's going to run again in 2028 after he wins this time.
No, he'll be in his 80s.
No, Trump wins in 24.
Kanye wins in 28.
Kanye would be a very young president.
I see him more of as a chancellor.
So you're saying 28, 32?
Well, you know, I'm going to have to explore more of his policies.
So have a fewer of Mac to attack scenario.
I'm going to have to figure out what this guy is really all about.
That's a funny person to be right now.
Like, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know i don't know i don't know
like the person completely oblivious to who kanye west has become like you know that graduation
album really good what's he been up to since yeah somebody sees him on the street and then
like they haven't caught up in like a decade they're like i said you go dig it and they just go and i saw this like wildly viral tweet with like
15 000 like hundreds of thousands of likes it was a guy being like damn
kanye does something like this are 50 000 more times we're gonna have a problem
someone who clearly loves his music.
What's going to happen to Kanye?
Six months from now, is he just
deplatformed
and we just don't hear about him anymore?
Yes, he just tweeted a
literal...
I don't know if Elon will deplatform him. Old Twitter
would have, yes. Maybe Instagram.
But he tweeted a photo of
the Star of David combined with a swastika
all right and and and what does that mean i don't know he tweeted like two hours ago what it means
you know yeah you sound like a jerry a rick would understand what does that mean i will tell you who
the real nazis are that's um oh, because he sees himself as the real Jew.
That's right.
Well, but like, is that right?
It's hard.
You said that you deplatform Milo and suddenly you don't hear about Milo anymore.
But Kanye's deplatform Alex and he didn't hear about him.
You deplatform Trump.
Yes, you deplatform Trump, at least from a general perspective.
I heard about him far less.
I just did because it's not constantly being retweeted for satire otherwise and people not making secondary jokes on it and stuff.
So I'm not saying that it's I'm not saying that it means anything valuable.
You might argue that it's not effective, but at very least like from my perspective yeah if you remove
them from the social media sites i'm on i see the less of them a lot less of them so trump's a tough
example because he also stopped being president of the united states so that's going to make him
less relevant and less repeated also has anyone at kanye's level been deplatformed oh my god the clue i mean trump
trump's was bigger than kanye and he got deplatformed uh that's the only person bigger
than kanye i can think of so that's a different time though that was at our that was us at our
our most woke as a as a society i think we're trending a little bit bit back the other way at
least in practice i think so and yeah and um no i I think that he's going to have to go the sort of Louis C.K. monetization route.
I think he will still be very successful.
Yeah, he's going to have a hard time, I think.
I think he's going to be doing, like, festivals.
No, this is, like, I mean, this seems like the most well-uniformed, like, response to his.
well-uniformed response
to his... Kanye's been
off the end for a while now, and
there's been a lot of people who have solidly
put him in the Chris Brown area
where they're like, I'll still listen to his music,
but God, I won't say it out loud.
He is very much
firmly in the, oh, we can't
touch him with a 100-foot pole.
You cannot...
It doesn't matter if you can monetize
the group of people that are happy about
you saying you agree with Hitler.
It is not in any way, shape, or form
the same value of losing the
Adidas sponsorship that he had
or the whatever. It's not
saying that he can't make money off of it, but
it's like if money or monetization was ever
a factor in this, he just would have not
said any of this.
Oh, sure, but going forward, the man's going to continue to be a recording artist i would assume
and to i don't know if there's a record label out there he's gonna have to self um i will not say it
i i would not say that you'll carry him right jericho yeah no i think i got a steer clear
that one i don't know i just honestly though kan. He can put out music, and people will listen, yes.
Of course.
Here you go, Jericho.
This is my next album.
It's called White Skinhead Part Deux.
And here you go.
Part Deux.
Yeah.
Part Deux.
I'm offended by your French, and I can't handle it.
No, that's what it would be.
It would be Part Deux.
Yeah, Part Deux.
So you wouldn't sign Kanye for real, Jericho?
I want him to make a rap
where he says something about au jus
and a roast beef sandwich
but keep the fork off of it.
I would love to see a rap
because he's really into the Bible and everything now
and it's a music video
and he's like Moses.
That would be so funny.
Dude, he's already done Jesus. how much better like how much more he knows this yeah the thing about kyle's theory of going the louis ck route
i'm not sure he has the infrastructure support like patreon's not going to pick him up he's
been debanked he doesn't need paypal well you need the process credit cards you need a cc processor okay
now that's true bank what does that mean so he has that that was his that was his private like
like the bank he used they were like we don't want your accounts anymore jp morgan i think yeah
major bank gonna be really hard to go anti-semitic and then keep like
keep your why's that?
What do you mean?
Oh no.
Oh, Bespinka.
You got it.
I was like, third one. You've been coaxed into a snap.
I have made you into the
No, I don't understand because
it seems like, look, he just sells his
music on his website. He doesn't.
He sells.
He stands for infinitely more than music, and he has for so long.
Kyle's trying to make his point about the new business model.
I think Kyle's saying the Louis C.K. route is open.
He sells directly to the individual.
What's up?
And I'm like, you need a bank for that.
You need a credit card processing for that.
I don't understand why that's an issue.
Why wouldn't a bank want money?
Wait, I don't understand why that's an issue. Why wouldn't a bank want money? Wait, I don't understand the credit card processing.
Did Visa and MasterCard say,
we're not going to take payment from you?
Because that's way different than saying,
I don't think he's going to get picked up
as a title sponsor of Visa and MasterCard.
So to answer your question, not yet.
But JP Morgan's already dropped him
and he had to find a new bank.
I don't know if a new bank picked him up.
That's one of the biggest banks in the world.
Yeah. And I guess I know if he picked him up. Thanks in the world. Yeah.
And I guess I just heard he got debanked and I'm like, oh, I
assume Wells Fargo doesn't want it.
Harder wouldn't work. He was like, my Apple
pay wouldn't work for four hours.
Well, I just find it
harder to leave out of the bank. You're not
going to debank an individual
when you're not going to like, are you going to disconnect
him from Swift? Like I like if he's going gonna have some way to process payments but again regardless of any of that i
still don't think that's the point any of this i sincerely have no idea what the fuck the point is
because you're just thrown he literally is lighting billions of dollars in every relationship
he's ever had family and otherwise on fire i don't really know what the that's like you know
i said it before you got here but but my theory outside of mental illness because here's the thing is there one
outside of the mental illness yes i feel like it's pretty he's clearly on i have one outside
of mental illness because and i say that because like if he truly wanted to like let's just say
he wanted to educate people about how those people are taking over or whatever it is he likes to say.
He could have done that much better with a billion
and a half more dollars in his pocket, quietly
behind the scenes funding groups who do that
and kept his mouth shut and kept the empire
going, but he didn't do that.
So maybe someone has someone he
loves held hostage and they're making him say
these things. And I know that's crazy.
Not as crazy as the things he's been saying
though.
Alright. I like say these things and and i know that's crazy not as crazy as the things he's been saying though all right there is i like i like this theory it's fun kardashian and the kardashian cabal have held ye's real family no i'm just in a cellar look yeah i'd like you know i've got your kid
i got your kid you tell him you tell him right now that you like Hitler.
And he's just like, the fuck?
He's like, can I like soften the blow a little bit and maybe say
he invented highways and microphones?
They're like, verbatim,
motherfucker. You're a lyricist.
Figure it out.
I want to hear
three Hitler compliments by the time you're
halfway through.
Comedy comes in threes, bitch. Comedy comes in threes, bitch.
Comedy comes in threes.
That explains it.
It's like the pig fucking in that Black Mirror episode, right?
It's like the only thing.
It's just so absurd that it has to be
something equally absurd.
It's a solid theory.
You know?
The best part about it is it's fun.
Kanye's a hero in this scenario
if someone has this unheld hostage then yeah yeah he's just trying to save the child and die hard
you know he didn't wear the sign he was forced to wear this having your child kidnapped and
tortured is no excuse for anti-semitism
tucker i i used that exact reference in the hangout like a month
did you like like a month ago like like like 60 days ago i was like it's just like that scene
from die hard where they made him wear the sign remember it's the exact same premise too the sign
said i hate ninjas and he's in harlem and he's i don't think he's wearing anything else like maybe
underwear boxers yeah wearing a scared look on his face. Oh wait.
So what if he's doing
this to get ahead of some nefarious thing?
What if Kanye West is in
Epstein's black book? What exactly
is he distracting from? You think this helps?
No, I don't.
You know, I don't know.
Like one thing at a time. They'll forgive one.
Okay? Like we were saying this earlier.
You can beat a girl up.
You can mate.
You can do any number of things.
If you're talented enough.
You can't do what he's done though.
You can play for the Cleveland Browns.
If you're good at football, you can get away with a ton.
You can't do what Kanye did though.
Who are you talking about, Jared?
Deshaun Watson and his 24 accused sexual assault victims.
Who's the guy that had his driver kill somebody for him?
Those are rookie numbers.
Did someone have their driver assassinate someone for them?
Yeah, I'm pretty sure.
Like an NFL player either had their driver take somebody out.
Aaron Hernandez, the Patriots player, yeah.
Yeah, oh man, his story's sad.
You know the whole story?
Yeah.
No, it's sympathetic to Aaronrian hernandez it's not
sympathetic but it's like kind of fucked up right like like he got found out he's like gay once he
was in prison and then this radio everybody kept it quiet they were like this isn't like
people are dead like we're not gonna make gay jokes and then this one radiate dj was making
all these like tight end jokes and and uh and like it got out there's one guy storming that
beach he committed suicide the next day committed suicide the next day i thought he was still in
prison he killed himself i didn't know that's not even his first murder it wasn't it wasn't it
turned out and he the person he killed it was over some petty shit
it was like dude you're in the nfl why are you even amongst these people i mean the cte stuff
is like like like currently uh um antonio brown is like the cool like poster child got to be the
worst optics for an nfl oriented player and since aaron hernandez or or Tyreek Hill beat his wife or like you know name another one
but like Chris literally what Chris Jericho no we don't talk no no NFL NFL and it's just like
you know um yeah it's just it's wild because you're you're looking at like all the things
that happen within the NFL and all the things that they're okay with forgiving.
Really, there is no limit. The Deshaun
Watson stuff was front and center
with sexual assault
and stuff. They're like,
gets half a season for suspension.
Then the Antonio
Brown stuff, he's not playing for any teams.
He just got kicked off a flight
from Miami to LA recently
for being in and out of consciousness and refusing to put on a seatbelt off a flight from Miami to LA recently for being
in and out of consciousness and refusing to put on a seatbelt
causing a flight while he took a
help me is he the one that was jerking it
a while back he was the one that was jerking it
not a while back is he the one
several weekends
the one
help me about this because I'm like not
keep going because the answer is yes it is
him that you're thinking of.
I believe that he's a crazy
person and no team would touch him and Tom Brady
stepped up and was like, we want him
in Tampa and stood up for him, got him
a job. Come live with me.
Come live with me.
Took him under his wing like I did.
And then he goes
now that Tom is having this very
messy divorce, which is clearly shaking him.
That same guy is posting like Photoshop pictures of Tom's now ex-wife nude on his Instagram.
Like really weird shit.
Like out of nowhere.
Super scumbag shit.
This is also the like we can.
Are you pulling up the phone?
is also the like we can are you pulling up the fuck dude this man is literally like i have like there is no better person to study and say like there's got to be some sort of cte centric motive
for this because we're talking about a historically very good player you ever seen chuck liddell have
a conversation is he still a very good player he's yeah he's still so good that the
dallas cowboys are like we don't fucking care if he just got kicked off the plane for being rowdy
get him on the dallas cowboys like he's literally he's so he's he's jerked off on camera in front
of people as recently as like three weeks ago and that doesn't even top the top thing that he did like this year.
And this is like a laundry list.
10 hours ago,
they put out a warrant for his arrest for domestic violence.
Oh,
that might be a problem.
I'm sorry.
No,
I don't know his 40 time.
Catching that man. That is, I mean, know his 40 time. Catching that, man.
That is...
He's 34.
Yeah, but it doesn't matter. He's that good.
Alright, so let me see...
If CTE's happening,
a 34-year-old NFL player's brain
is...
You've been in the league for, what, 16 years
at that point? You started playing at 18?
I truly don't know, and that's on me.
Your brain's got to be rattled as fuck.
You start 13.
He's been in this match his whole life.
If you're a kid like him, he probably started peewee, like, 7, 8.
Now, I know they're not getting popped in the head at 7 or 8, but 13 or 14, yeah.
And by the time you're in your mid-30s in the NFL, you've taken so many head knocks.
You literally, the worst thing for the NFL this season,
which is the third time I've said that, by the way,
which is a bad season for the NFL.
The Tua Tagovaiola.
Holy shit, that was hard for me.
The quarterback for the Miami Dolphins, Tua.
All right, this man got hit
so hard and was like
clearly cast in spells.
No.
Unlimited power!
That's like a significant portion of his brain matter dies he's like like literally he's a millionaire stop feeling bad for him no he literally no it was so
fucked up because he had clear concussion um in the game four days prior and everybody's like
whoa this man is looking lost he should not be out there and he still prior and everybody's like, whoa, this man is looking lost. He should not
be out there. And he still played
and everybody's like, that could have been bad.
And then he starts the next game and he
gets hit and like, you know,
smells like
just borderline
repeat some sort of absurd percentage
of people who get repeat concussion or whatever
end up paralyzed or
permanently damaged.
And he's like one of those.
Yeah.
One of the lucky people is like to me anyway, I only see it in the most severe of concussions.
And like like one of the worst knocks I've ever seen was Ben Astrin taking that knee to the head.
Yeah.
And he's faced.
I don't think he did it. I don't think he had a fencing response
but um but but but that might be the hardest hit i've ever seen the follow-up to i think
everyone talks about the knee mashed him so hard he immediately came down and punched his face into
the with one of the hardest most accurate after the after the you know initial ko punches you i've ever seen yeah just a big old
hammer fist right on the face and his head bounces off the canvas and like does one of these it was
hard and then and he took the knee then he hit the mat then he had some more and yeah fuck ben how
much did you give up just then i mean that's the thing that happened in hockey too
like there's the big hit which is rough but then when the head hits the ice that could be the bigger
hit if the helmet came off in a like i worry about them in a fight has anybody ever been in a fight
roughing it up and then like no no no if we're gonna talk hockey with no helmet the one that
always makes me uncomfortable is the guy who gets his carotid artery sliced
and then malarchuk yeah and then the guy get the combat medic comes in there and swoops and
like let me just pinch that off real quick for you bro you're not dying today this guy it happened
it happened this year i think i sent the gillian our whatsapp it wasn't one night it was yeah it
was a couple times wasn't his arm or was it yeah it was his arm so evander kane like he like got
knocked over and then the guy we're talking about earlier pat maroon who's an enormous player
accidentally steps on evander kane's uh wrist and apparently it cut him to the bone of his wrist
and so immediately you start seeing the ice like like blood and so he grabs his wrist and like
is skating off and immediately as soon as like mar and the Tampa Bay Lightning on the other team see
it, they're like, play's dead.
Hey, get a fucking medic over here.
Don't let him die. That's horrible
optics for the sport.
How do you get the blood off the ice? Did they scrape it
up and then shovel it away? They do.
They scrape it up to get it off.
I've seen them tend the
goals and stuff.
That's the other thing. When you go to a sport, I've seen them like 10, the goals and stuff. Oh, God. That's the other thing.
Like when you go to a sport, I wonder what else.
So I've only attended professional wise, just just just baseball, UFC and hockey.
So I'm wondering, is there anything else?
All right.
So in baseball, you see them go out there and manicure the mound like like like like, you know, between commercials and stuff.
And when nobody's looking at it, does it go on TV and manicure the mound like like like like like you know between commercials and stuff and when nobody's looking it's that does it go on tv and uh in hockey you get to see
some hot girls go out there in case you don't know and like very revealing clothes and like
make a show of like scraping up the ice and shoveling it away those are all butch men and
people who won contests there's nothing attractive about that i'm sure everybody does something
different with it i've definitely seen like black. All the Southern teams,
all the Southern teams,
like in football style,
like have like teeny skimpy little outfits on them.
Carolina hurricanes were the first team to get fucking smoke shows to like
clean up the snow in front of the net.
There was a turn.
I forget the name for him,
but like,
yeah,
it was like the whatever Carolina smoke shows and they they're hot.
Yeah. i have a
friend that fucked one oh very nice good for your friend it's me actually yeah it was
i love that scene from billy mattis's where will ferrell's i mean um um chris Farley's looking at Adam Sandler. He's like, me and her got it on.
And Adam Sandler's like, no, you didn't.
He's like, nah, but this guy, no.
Oh, yeah, right up in there.
And he's like, no, no, he didn't.
He's like, no, no, he didn't.
But you can imagine what it'd be like if he did.
Like, yeah, I can imagine what it would be like
if another man hypothetically had sex with that woman.
Yeah.
It's a shame.
How far removed are we going to be in this fantasy?
It's a shame he's dead.
It's a shame he's dead.
He was a funny man.
Him and John Candy, two of the best.
I heard that Chevy Chase treated Farley really poorly because he reminded him of Belushi
and how he was that big fat over the top.
And that it had killed him.
And he lost his friend that way.
And he just didn't like Farley at all.
I did not know that.
Although Chevy Chase hates everybody.
Everybody says he's a douche.
Oh, he's got an excuse for this one guy.
Fuck Chevy Chase.
Yeah, fuck Chevy Chase.
Although I love his movies.
Christmas Vacation.
Y'all never seen it?
The show's about to end pretty soon.
Christmas Vacation. Roll them up. That's love his movies. Christmas Vacation, y'all never seen it? The show's about to end pretty soon? Christmas Vacation, one of my...
Roll them up!
That's National Lampoon's Vacation,
which you'll want to watch after Christmas Vacation
because you'll like it so much.
Don't watch Vegas Vacation.
You get to see Beverly DeAngelo Topless
in National Lampoon's, and she has amazing tits.
At the very least, if you don't watch Christmas Vacation,
you don't watch National Lampoon's Vacation,
Google Beverly's tits from National Lamp's vacation do that okay see those shower titties
okay all right those are fantastic oh you know what this is like a core memory for me i'm there
eyes closed like i i remember
one of those those tentpole memories y'all have any christmas i'm watching on reddit right
now solid enjoy yeah y'all have any christmas movies that are like your christmas here's here's
my movies i'll let you think while you do this um christmas vacation is probably number one um
i um die hard and everybody chooses Elf
and it upsets me because Elf was not
one for me, but what was the other one?
I need time to think about my own list.
I had a third, but I'm spaced on it now.
Elf is hilarious. I really like
Elf. Elf is great.
Yeah, I think it's funny. Oh, Bad
Santa. Bad Santa's up there for me. That counts
as a Christmas movie. I love Bad Santa.
I might choose Bad Santa for that one. Mine are mostly the irreverent ones i guess but but like i really like oh the christmas vacation everybody comes together it's kind of about how hectic
things are and then how you come together as a family regardless um did you see that remember
the original christmas story with little ralphie licks the pole the bb got you 24 7 only uh looping tv so that one is literally in just in
bold or whatever the word just emblazed in my head have you seen the sequel no there shouldn't be a
sequel and i'm not doing that not only is there a sequel which just i believe either just came out
or is just about to come out ralphie's back the actor who played ralphie is the dad now trying to put on an old
timey fucking christmas for his family and everything's going better be a leg lamp there
better be you know there'll be a leg lamp i thousand percent there'll be a leg limp like
the weird thing is his face it still looks like a little kid but old it's like you took it's like
you took a a fucking snap Snapchat app or whatever and aged him
and just put some lines on his forehead and some bags under his eyes or whatever.
And it's like, yeah, there's a 60-year-old rapper.
A Christmas story, too.
Yeah, his name is Peter Billingsley.
Oh, my God, he does look like him.
I mean, it's him, just so we're clear.
He just still very much looks like
A child
He looks like him
It's all coming together
He looks like himself
Like a lot
Alright we're gonna call it a show
Because
What is Mike
No what is Mike
I swear
It just clicks off,
what is the deal?
Oh, good. He's mad at the mic, not me.
So you guys know where to find...
Woody snapped on a kid in the hangout.
Well, I did too, by the way.
But Woody snapped on a kid in the hangout,
and it was beautiful.
It's like a guy that I played games with a lot.
At first, he was like,
bro, I was so stoned,
I didn't even know Woody was telling a story.
Oh, my God. Apparently, he was so stoned. I didn't even know what he was telling a story. Oh, my.
Apparently he was.
And I didn't.
And I mistimed my interjection.
Now.
All right.
So, Jericho, anywhere new everyone can find you?
All the same places?
Still the same stuff.
Yeah.
Check out Jericho.
Leave comments on his videos about how I was right in that thing Kyle and I are arguing
about that is true and whatever it was yep and Woody will you'll talk to him next week when he's
back in the audio so that is pka 624 check out the spot