Painkiller Already - PKA 672 W/ Brandon Herrera: Leading The Polls For Congress, Gods Light On Taylor, Redneck Childhood Trauma

Episode Date: November 4, 2023

Like a Sunday roast. Oh, we just started. PKA 672 with our guest Brandon Herr. Taylor? This episode of PKA is brought to you by Neurohacker Collective, Qualius Analytic, pharaohdistro.com, and Lock and Load, a bunch of wonderful sponsors we'll talk more about later. Brandon, it's great to see you.

I've been telling Chiz to get you back on for a while now. Dude, thank you guys for having me again. It's always a pleasure. Of course. So ever fall asleep in a hot tub and die you know it hasn't happened yet no it's a way to go i was just saying like matthew perry went out the way everyone should go out doing the thing you love high as you know high as fuck fall asleep in a tub allegedly uh probably and and you know just drift away and then get just slow cooked till you're just

the bones are falling out you know i i bet he was just a goddamn mess when they found him how long was he in there before percolating for um they had him on low for they had him set on low for 36 hours at least all right let me just tell you put a tough-ass pot roast in on low for four hours, you can cut it with a spoon. Matthew Perry definitely fell apart in the hot tub. He was tender. That's why further testing is needed to determine the cause of death.

What are you going to do? You're going to do a toxology test on the water in the hot tub? He was full of chlorine. Was that his drug of choice? Was it opiates and alcohol i think so right yeah i think all those are risky business to mix at all okay much less in a hot tub or some kind of upper like that like back in the day it was something like that because he was so skinny he did get thin yeah yeah he looked good

in those seasons like he was i that was my favorite part when I saw friends is like, I get this guy like just wildly oscillating weights. Yeah. Like a real fucking person. Yeah. I like it, too. That was the best thing. I feel like cocaine would be if you're going to do drugs in a hot tub, probably the safest. Right. Like you're not passing out in a hot tub if you're coked up. Might have a heart attack, though, with the blood pressure and the heat. The vasoconstrictor of the cocaine, the vasodilation of the hot water, perfect health. The elevated heart rate from the cocaine

and the 104 temperatures and the steam. Hot water gives you vasodilation? Yeah. Would it make my dick harder? It could, right? Because that's what a... Harder than what? Woody's buying a hot tub. Hold on, I'll be back in 35 minutes. Harder than it would otherwise be

in sitting in room temperature. You just wrap it in a wet towel, Woody. You don't need a whole hot tub. No, that makes it soft. Like an old flu remedy. Put a wet sock on your cock and sit under a fan until the sniffles go away.

I got trench cock. To be fair, I don't think him sitting in that hot tub would be that much worse as far as finding a body goes. Then a lot of the shit cops already find like just the people soup of once you just have been dead for like three days and you just melt into the fucking carpet. Yeah, it's pretty disgusting. There's one of the videos that I saw. Kyle, I'm sure you've seen shit like this before because you're like kind of as fucked up as i am the uh where like somebody died on like a banister on their on their house and they went in like it was like a week later and it just dripped down the stairs onto a couch like just what used to be that person you're like ah god who even fucking

cleans that oh someone who's not making enough there was a great reddit ama maybe once with a guy who did crime scene cleanup and uh and he had those or maybe it was just a question it was like hey people who do crime scene cleanup tell me your nightmares uh and it's just one thing after another and and it's what you said it's it's finding the super person um you would think a bathtub would make cleanup easy because at least it's contained in there. Yeah, just drain it. And then also when the pets eat the people. And apparently cats, like an hour, three hours tops after you're dead, the cat's going to start eating your lips off, your eyes out, stuff like that. You're still on the phone asking for help. Yeah.

The cat's just licking its lips in the corner. Yeah. They're devilish animals. They don't care for us. We get vultures in our yard so like every once in a while i'll just like be by the pool on the lounge chairs or something and there's like 18 vultures on my roof and i'm like guys i got like 20 years left oh more than 20 you're gonna you're gonna blast past. Taylor, if it was 18 months, I wouldn't be surprised.

Okay, okay. If it's natural causes, you're firing into the 90s, I would imagine. But given your risky behavior profile, if you die before then, it'll be catastrophic. I'll say that. Yeah. It'll be instantaneous. Yeah, I think. It's going to be a real crash.

Kyle will just come across it on reddit i'll have to inform jackie i'll be the first to know i'll be like i know that guy holy shit this guy on the podcast with that russian felon in the retard who uploaded this savage raleigh paramotor oh no dude when that thing went down in israel i was like oh woody better stay clear of the skies for a bit no paramotors here are just something that that wealthy guys do for fun like oh there's no there's no bad blood no no bad reputation in america of paramotors that was my first thought i'm not gonna lie i saw that i was like woody's gonna have an interesting take on this yeah i told the story before i landed the police saying that we were people called 911 and said we were terrorists

that was like it had to be a prank though we talked a little bit about you i think it was an idiot no i don't think so of course it was um we talked a little bit about how difficult it'd be to shoot him out of the air at like say 45 miles per hour 3 000 feet of altitude yeah that'd be pretty pretty hard to do you're leading him by a second if you're using like five five six three thousand feet a second like it's kind of difficult how many shots would it take because kyle and brandon you're both very good with guns well he's getting gone fast right and you gotta or you gotta know he's coming so you're ready for him you see him you see him towards you in the sky i'm at 3 000 feet away i don't think i hear you even shooting do i i don't think i'm probably not over the motor yeah the motor's so loud and i'm wearing hearing probably double hearing protection and i might have music going so you get as many shots

as you want you're doing fucking terrorism and you had, you're just jamming to Katy Perry. Um, you just got highway to hell. I can't imagine like something, I don't know what 3000 feet of altitude looks like an object up there. So I'm just imagining a thousand yards. It's really hard to see.

I'm going to have a hard... I don't think I'm hitting you, dude. I think I'm scaring the shit out of you if you see my tracers, though. You know what you could do? FPV drone. You could take me out with that. Oh, I could tangle you up, slow you down a little, get you spiraling. Well, I assumed it was explosive. I've watched too much

Ukrainian footage. Oh, well, no. I want you alive. Well, if you hurt me at 3,000 feet, I don't think you can have that. Yeah, and I don't think that you actually have to land right away, though. We're coming with the dogs. We've been planning this for a while. You wouldn't want to blow Woody and his paramotor

up if you were like, if you were an insurgent, you'd want to recover some of his useful paramotor parts. So you'd just want to tangle them up, have it fall, then do scrappinging scrapping like in rust right there's no no no way i'm getting there's no way i'm shooting someone out of the sky and thinking like this is a great mode of transportation for a man on the go and that's scrapping it on and buzzing off that's also like the good luck charm of you're using a dead man's paramotor like oh this worked out great for the last guy yeah that's

true or maybe it got all the bad luck out when you when you killed him and now it's on the the highway to heaven i don't know last time you were on you hadn't yet announced your candidacy for congress in texas how is that going i i might move there just to vote for you shockingly well i might accidentally have a job. So it's been interesting. So we were already obviously in the preparation stages for a long time before this. So I was tempted to tease something on the last PKA, but I couldn't say anything. Yeah.

I would have gotten yelled at. But no, it's actually been incredible. So it's kind of, you know, I got to that point where, you know, with YouTube and everything, I got to the point where I considered, you know, hey, I basically, in my eyes have won the game of life, like, I don't have to really do anything I don't want to do anymore. And I just keep doing this, because, you know, it's a good business thing. And it's, I genuinely enjoy doing it, you know. But now I'm like, okay, now I can do some side quests of things that I actually think are important. And so I'm kind of in side quest mode. So i won my boxing match and then uh now i'm i'm doing this other thing which so wait what office are you running for exactly so uh u.s uh federal congress district 23 shit so this is

real deal this is u.s federal congress yeah so uh my current opponent is tony gonzalez who uh just kind of a really really well i could say it here on the show. Nobody's going to get mad. Limp dick Republican. What a bitch. I hate that guy. This is the first I've heard of him. That guy's ugly.

He's ugly, and he also, he looks like a lesbian gym coach. But he doesn't really. He doesn't live in Texas. Yeah, I've heard he fucks women, so he's guilty. Allegedly, allegedly. But he no, he voted for gun control, which is an immediate way to piss me off. But he just has a bunch of other bad votes. Wait, there's a Republican in Texas running under gun.

What gun control did he vote for? Yeah, it was the the bipartisan Safer Communities Act. He basically did a bunch of like red flag laws and stuff like that. He was like one of 10 or 15 republicans who voted for it so bipartisan but yeah so we see how well those work yeah get the hell out we just had a perfect case study of the red flaw lag uh red flag law at work right which one the main one you need the one with the man hunt last week yeah oh yeah yeah yeah so that yeah. To be fair, which one indeed? I don't know. They blend together.

The one in Maine, I guess, with a real lot of red flags. You really got to do something to stand out these days in the shooting game. Yeah. What are the memorable ones? The Vegas one. Vegas is number one by far. Vegas is so memorable. They never revisited it.

It's just like, man, that's crazy. That guy carried 30,000 pounds of guns and then fired them with all the hands. They've got the video of the, I will say, so there's a lot of sketchy shit on that shooting,

but I, there, I will say that they did have the videos of the, and it's a little creepy of the, the bellhop is helping him carry these multiple carriages full of guns, like just gun cases and everything up to his room. Like you can't see their guns, obviously,

but they're probably used to shot show though. They wouldn't even like whatever. And the rules changed significantly after that about like guns and hotels and everything in Vegas. I mean, obviously, but that was wild. That was the one shooting that I woke up the next day and I was like,

this might be the big one. Is there a committee you're hoping for if you win? We're still looking into it right now. Really, I'm also going to be – so we're getting to that point where we're looking into specific committees and whatnot. Do you know who Jeff Jackson is? Do you know that name?

He's a North Carolina guy who has the job you're running for, but in North Carolina. And you might recognize him because he's like a TikTok star, but he's not a joke. It's just the platform he uses to do his two minute videos on what's happening. And it's this really, he's a Democrat, but he comes across as unbiased to me anyway. And he just speaks really soberly about what's going on, what it's really like to do this job. If you haven't seen it, you might even get some insight from him and perspective. Yeah, I'd love to take a look.

But I have a point. He talked about the UFO stuff, which was pretty interesting. And he talked about the huge difference between the representatives when they're on camera and when they're off camera. Off camera, they can be pretty sane and smarter than you'd think right on camera they're playing a character they're actors i've noticed that i've talked to a few members of congress that like you know are dramatically different and not necessarily in a bad way but like dramatically different on camera and when they're they're doing their job and then when you talk to them on the phone or something like that you see the real person actually come out and it's, it's, it's a very different. I remember where I was going. He explained the committee assignments

and just, he's like, well, so I'm a freshman. I'm not going to get the most plum committee assignments, but they look at it. I asked for this, this or that. And because I had a military background, they thought I would be a good fit for this one here. So I wonder what they'll look at with your background and be like, ah, this guy would be perfect for this. Also kind of crazy. Uh, they, something I with your background and be like, ah, this guy would be perfect for this. Also kind of crazy. Uh, they, something I didn't know until fairly recently,

I'm learning a lot about how the inner deeper politics works. Not all of it. Good. In fact, most of it, not, um, but yeah,

surprise, surprise. But the, um, one of the things is you have to, you have to pay for your committee assignments. I had never heard that before. Yeah. So like, there's a different price associated with one.

Money that matters, or is it like it's probably $7 for that? Like $100,000. What? So something that you couldn't afford just on the pay of that job. So crazy. That's weird, Taylor. It is the pay of the job. Stop doing that.

Wait, wait wait what's your level of confidence on this i've never heard this before i think you have to be sponsored for some some bit of it i like i i'm i'm pretty confident i was just watching a video the other day where it was active like sitting members of congress talking about that and so uh i think it varies wildly depending on what assignment you're trying to i wonder if they wave it and stuff like so here's the thing that i know when kevin mccarthy was going through all're trying to get. I wonder if they waive it and stuff. So here's the thing that I know. When Kevin McCarthy was going through all those votes to get his speakership back in January,

committee assignments were a way that he was winning people over. Like, all right, Brandon, you vote for me over this silly head, and I'll put you on the Judiciary Committee, which is a good one. I wonder if he was able to waive fees. I don't know. That's crazy. Here we go. I've got one.

It's problems with the committee tax in Congress. Less coveted gavels on the B committees, like the Transportation and Infrastructure Committee, come with a price tag of $875,000. What? Wow. Yeah. So no part of this is just a gag. And you would pay that? Wow. Yeah. So none,

so no part of this is just, and you would pay that. Like I'm going to have to, so like, like I said, I've got a couple of meetings with some people that have been doing this for a long time and we're going to try to figure out like exactly how the system works and how.

Yeah. And by that, I'm not, I wasn't saying, would you want to pay that? I was like, the politician pays that personally or that's like a government collection. Yeah. I believe so. and i think that's why like there's several people that can contribute to that and that's really pay it too like who gets that money who's the guy like right

straight to the president nice it was straight to the big man for the big guy yeah that's how it all starting to make sense now yeah there's a lot of weird like money stuff and obviously like having to learn all the fec rules uh to like basically how to be able to finance your campaign to not go to prison that's been really cool i don't think i'd do very well in prison that's i'm good you'd be all right oh yeah you'd do well kyle did great gun guys they're very likable very charismatic it'd be good. That matters. Yeah. You just have to not shit for four weeks and read a lot of Harry Potter.

It's really important to know how to work a firearm in a place where none of them are allowed. I like to imagine that they were waiting for me to poop to rape me, but because I was so constipated, that whole month went by and they're just like, he's never met us. Man, a man this stubborn before.

He knows it's coming. That Kyle motherfucker, he's just unrapeable. I'm letting him go. Unrapeable. I'm impressed. Never seen anybody hold a shit for a month. I mean, is part of you, were you a little insulted no one tried? Well, I mean, that guy made that comment.

I was so scared of that. I was legitimately, I'm telling you, made that comment. I was so scared of that. I was legitimately that. I'm telling you, it was two weeks in or whatever, and I had finally relaxed. I was like, this is nothing. I'm going to sit on this bunk and read fucking books for the next whatever and six weeks or whatever was left. And who cares? And then that like two weeks in again, this guy's told me the somebody over there wants to get with you oh that ruined my day

that ruined your day the next 30 minutes I was anxious for the next remainder of my stay then Reba came on the white TV I bet you've never sat on your bunk and waited for your buddy to go take a shower

before you could have you. I'm so scared. I want to get the facts right on this. These are fundraising goals like that 875,000. That's not something you're supposed to pay. You're supposed to get on the phones and raise that for the party. Right. Right.

That's harder. That's difficult. Depends on your network, right? Like depends on what billionaires you go funding yeah i'd also well i'd also like to look into what the fundraising rules are for that because like there's for my race in particular i think it's like um unless it goes to the victory fund which is a whole different thing but like an actual personal donation caps out at 3300 so to raise you raise $1.2 million that way is incredibly difficult.

Yeah. I don't know what the, is that the limit total that you could donate to any political campaign? What, when you're, I always make a joke to girls. What I'll say is like, Hey, I know I didn't ask, but I didn't think you'd mind. The maximum campaign donation to Donald Trump is $5,000. And I'd already sent that in so donate it in your name they flip they lose their fucking shit when you tell them that you will lose a girlfriend real quick if you stick to that

story for too long that's pretty funny though it's worth it and I bet it would endear them to you a little bit because they're like wow this guy can just throw $10,000 around not caring can I write this off my taxes now is that how that works i don't know actually so you don't get to write it off at all yeah political contributions aren't tax deductible

it's not like a good cause which i you know i was shocked too i didn't think so going in either but yeah they are they're not they're not tax deductible there's got to be like someone's created a loophole for that though right these are the most powerful and influential people in the world there's got to be a way to donate politically and have it be tax deductible is there's got to be like someone's created a loophole for that though right these are the most powerful and influential people in the world there's got to be a way to donate politically and have it be tax deductible maybe you're donate to your group or or some fund or something that in essence is you feel like there is like i bet there's some uh foundation right that probably has political influence sierra Foundation is an environmental group that people don't know. Yeah. Okay. I see a lot of people up in arms about that Jewish... What's the big influence group?

The super... Whatever it's called? The... APAC. APAC. APAC, is that it? I think it's American-Israeli Political Action Conference or Committee. I see them getting a lot of flack these days.

I really, I usually have, I feel like I can take the temperature of the room and kind of see how a world event might, because it's usually black and white, red and blue. But this time around with this Israeli thing, the left really doesn't know exactly how to feel about it. Yeah. It's a rather divisive issue on the left,

and to some extent on the right, but not nearly as much, I don't think. Evangelical Christians are always going to stand with God's chosen people and the Holy Land, etc., etc., so just done, the far right. But on the left, you've got a substantial amount of people who are rocking that Palestinian flag and talking about who are like rocking that palestinian flag and talking about you know terrorism basically you know like there's some rough customers on the left and they're and they're really showing their uh showing what they mean to what they've meant the whole time a lot of the blm i love when i saw the chicago blm twitter like tweet out the palestinian flagged out uh paramotor or whatever with the gun and like that's great did that was insane i thought

that was a parody i i retweeted that i thought it was a fucking parody at first i didn't think it was real no it's like a we did it's like a paramotor outline with the palestinian colors like edited onto it and like a gun on top or something like an ak or something here's like i could get mildly on board with someone who was like pro innocent civilian in palestine or something you know yeah i saw a little girl she was like seven years old being like why are you attacking me she like dust all over her and everything and it's like okay okay if you're trying to say war is horrible let's talk about this i get it but to actually support like the paramotorists who did

the shooting and shit, that's the horrible part. How can you be in favor of that? That's their 9-11. He's the most Jews killed, I think, in one day since the Holocaust. I let you finish. I'm glad I did. Because I'm like, that can't be right.

A little man called adolf wants to says you're disrespecting his legacy i thought you're gonna go the holocaust denial route like no no no no that's that's my take that's my i call dibs we don't we don't tread on each other's conspiracies 20 million dead jews i mean i never forget. I used to daydream about running for politics, but I have... Are you a Holocaust denier? You don't think 20 million Jews die? Too many times.

I've seen that meme. Okay, maybe it happened, but 10 million fireflies? 10 million fireflies? Yeah, that's true. I've been watching the Palestinian thing fairly closely, mostly on Reddit, on r Palestine or our Israeli conflict.

All of the sketchier, smaller, newer subreddits that are showing the scariest, scariest stuff. It is not easy to watch all this dead Palestinian civilian stuff. It's rough. It makes it hard. Lots of dead children. Lots of blown apart children like compound fractures um they're laying there in pain you know they're not being properly treated because there is no so it's like they're fucked like it's i saw them laying on the floor and what

looked like hospital if it wasn't a hospital was a makeshift hospital and uh these were kids like it is when you see like a leg that doesn't look savable from the shin down and it's like an eight year old cute little girl. Then it's like, wow, this, this situation. Yeah. They just bombed that refugee camp. Right. They're like, Hey, there's a bad guy in here.

And they drop. What did you say again? I did it again. They get front. So they bombed the refugee camp and they took out the Ibrahim guy.'s who's some leader who they claim was part of the attack leading it on on the foot maybe and then like a big outcry how you can't strike a refugee camp you knew the civilians were there and they were like yeah we also knew he was there basically they're like yeah fuck you we knew he was there he's hiding amongst civilians so we blew him up with like a 500 pound

multiple 500 pound bombs it left this crater that looks like god stuck his dick in the earth and the next day maybe two days later again again they did it like like i don't know the exact same the israelis are going so hard in the paint in a way that in a way that high school me wanted someone to feel it after 9-11. You know, it was like fucking go get them and don't hold back. You know, it was like, I don't care. I don't want to hear about smart bombs. I don't want to hear about that shit. Get them B-52s in the air. You know, like so. So I know where they're coming from.

But man, you can't watch that footage over there in Palestine and not think wish we were way more accurate with these bombs or at least more discriminant with where we dropped them or when you told me like i think it was during i don't want to see dead children anymore i think it was i think it was during the hangout kyle that you said like yeah they said there was one guy in the refugee camp so they bombed the whole thing and like i thought I thought you were joking. I hadn't seen that. I thought you were joking. That's how we roll too, just to be fair. Like if Osama bin Laden's hiding out at Toys R Us, get fucked.

Yeah, we do lots of fucked up shit. Actually, that's a bad example. They could have indiscriminately bombed Osama bin Laden's house, but instead they went in there and did it surgically. That's why. If they had a picture of him, they'd have blew that shit up.

There might have been more than one reason because I've heard that they did that one in particular so that they didn't have collateral damage so they didn't just bomb uh what is the smoke his wife it's not palestinian or excuse me pakistan i can't pakistan i i couldn't not say palestine even though i knew it wasn't there i almost did the same fucking thing so yeah yeah yeah so i think they just didn't want to like murder bunch of Palestinians with 500-pound bombs like the Israelis did. That's what I was told. You ever watch the movie with the redhead and the redhead CIA

lady who founded... Zero Dark Thirty. No, tell me more about the redhead. Isn't it Ron Howard's daughter? Is it the madman, big tit bitch? No, Christina Hendricks? No, I don't even care. It's the one who got fat. Oh, never mind. Tell me less about the redhead. What's this movie?

Zero Dark Thirty is very good. It's the story of the killing of Osama bin Laden. It's really nitty gritty. It's a spy thriller. It was that lady. Dallas Price Howard. Oh, Jurassic Park with the ass. Yeah, with the ass, lots of ass.

They have to shop her ass down so the posters don't look the same. Now that's a war crime. Uh-huh. You shouldn't allow that. Oh, wow. That's like breast reduction surgery. Her uncle's one of the ugliest men on the planet. Now look at Clint Howard.

They used Clint Howard back in the day to be an alien in Star Trek every time they needed an ugly motherfucker. Is Clint Howard the hideous guy in Spaceballs who turns around with the helmet on? Oh, well, I don't know about that. No, probably not. That's too long ago. Ron Howard's Opie from Andy Griffith Show and

famed Hollywood director, of course. That's the Spaceballs guy. I didn't know he was in Spaceballs. I've never seen Spaceballs. You've never seen Spaceballs? I've seen a movie that you haven't. That's wild. I know enough about Spaceballs guy. I didn't know he was in Spaceballs. I've never seen Spaceballs. You've never seen Spaceballs? I've seen a movie that you haven't, and that's wild. I know enough about Spaceballs. I don't need to watch Spaceballs. Oh, shit, it is Jessica Chastain.

Never mind. I was completely wrong. Oh. Well, I got a chance to see a hot redhead. Well, hot redheads. There's only like five of them in Hollywood, so. They're all being pushed out. That's something we need to talk about,

is the hot redheads being pushed out. So, Taylor, tell us more about this replacement theory. They're taking all the big titted, big boogie redheads and they're not putting them in movies anymore. And that's, and I know Kyle agrees with me on the redhead thing. You need more of them. I agree. Yeah. I like, like big-titted redheads. Those are the best women in the world. If I had a virus that I could release and it would spread

like fire through this planet... And it creates more? There are like brunette women waking up with bigger tits and red hair. That's not what it would do. Taylor's virus is pretty good. My virus is better than yours. Your virus fucking sucks good My virus is better than, your virus fucking sucks My virus is a lot meaner than your virus No, well my virus is about love

What is this, wipe out the non-big red-headed And all the men Except for you It's just me and them All 12 million of them Yeah, see, that's the difference Between us, you're trying to hoard. I'm trying to spread love.

This is what Fauci was actually working on. Yeah, a chicken in every pot and a naked, big-titted, red-headed bimbo in every pet. That would be my FDR-style campaign. The new deal. We invade Scotland or Ireland. Both, actually. They both have lots of redheads.

Ship them all over here. Only the good ones, though. Only the good ones? Only the attractive ones. Okay. There's a scale at Ellis Island. And we turn them back if it's too high. You don't need a scale.

Just make the door so narrow that the big ones can't get through. That's a good idea. It's curved in the tit and ass area, so any amount there is good. I have to put this out there. I think big tit fans are not forward thinking. How long do you think this big-titted hottie is going to stay that way?

When I think about a sexy woman, the first thing I think is, after I marry her, is she still going to be hot in 30 years? That's the first thing I think when I see a sexy woman plan ahead really yes yes you should be packing money i think i wonder what retirement looks like and finding some emma watson looking chick to bury no that's gay no yeah it is pretty gay to like emma watson no you we want that i i don't think i've ever been as triggered by a take of your system.

You want to marry a woman, you fucking homo. Yeah. All right. Now, what are you going to do when you're elected to increase the amount of big titted redheads? Well, I am big on immigration policy. So that's that's just a side of things that people didn't understand before. I guess I'm very big on legal immigration from Scotland and Ireland specifically. Yes.

Yeah. This is making a lot of sense. Selectively open borders. Yes. Well, I mean, yeah. Yeah. You just bring in absolute hotties. That's literally how this country was founded is hot Irish and Scottish women. Yeah. Just some big. And German. That's literally how this country was founded is hot Irish and Scottish women.

So, yeah, just some some some big German potato. Way more Germans than you think. Oh, it's wild that World War World War Two World War One. We didn't have any sort of issue at all. There were so many Germans here. Yeah, I mean, even here in Texas, like up by like Fredericksburg and places, there's places, cities here, entire cities that are just completely German dominated, like German restaurants, half like half of the strip is just German restaurants. Like it's a huge like still pockets of Germanic influence. You know, I'd love to see one of those South American like Nazi villages that's all Germanic with the architecture and everything. And then there's fucking people still speaking the language and stuff.

Some boys from Brazil type shit. I'd love to see that did you see the one uh it's down in brazil it's uh like this one uh one town or whatever that is uh basically like descended from confederates that left after the war and they still to this day in like in in fucking confederate regalia, big Confederate flags, gone-with-the-wind type of balls and everything. It's fucking wild. See, that's bullshit. They need to adopt the culture of the country they move into. Well, it looks like they've adopted it quite well.

They're refugees, buddy. They're refugees, not immigrants, all right? There's a big difference. I don't know. When in Rome, do as the Romans do. That's not very woke of you but i also like trying to tear away the culture of those poor refugees when trump driven from their home by the wall of northern aggression like i i do like that they

did what all the celebrities in like 2015 were like if trump wins i'm moving to canada like those guys were like if it doesn't turn right, I'm moving to fucking to be named country way down there. And then they went money where their mouth is. They're still flying the stars and bars, eating fried chicken, whatever they're doing down there, having a good time. I guarantee you their food is fucking awesome. Yeah. Southern food is great. It's like but having great food when it's all fried.

Big cheat codes. Southern food is great. But having great food when it's all fried, big cheat code. Southern food with Hispanic influence. So it's even spicier. That's better. I like that. Any good food that doesn't make you fat. I'm with Taylor on this. It's easy enough to just deep fry everything. And you can deep fry a banana and make it good. Yeah. I still will eat it, but it is a bit cheaty where it's like, we make the best fried chicken and it's like,

yeah, if I ate mediocre fried chicken, it's fantastic. I've been eating at this Cuban restaurant. It's like $8 for this huge plate of rice, beans, and pulled pork. It's so delicious. And they put three little plantains on top of the pork.

It's amazing. I love that food. You like plantains now? You a plantain man? I've always liked plantains. top of the pork. It's amazing. I love that food. You like plantains now? You a plantain man? I've always liked plantains. Yeah. I like bananas in general, but any sort of banana. He talks about plantains.

Yeah. You can't get this guy and his fucking plantains. You can't keep them away from me. Just on and on and on. You know I'm allergic, right? Get it started. I like power through my allergy to eat more of them. You're allergic to bananas and plantains?

Are plantains the baby bananas? My whole mouth feels like I've been chewing fiberglass when I eat a banana. But I love those things, so I like slice them up in cereal, have a Benadryl. I love bananas, but if they made my mouth hurt, I wouldn't eat them. You don't like banana pudding? Banana pudding's worth a little pain. Just a little plantain,

a little Benadryl, and I just keep eating plantains till i see the hat man yep bananas do make any you can have what is this shitty cereal total right they totally have you guys ever had that the total is brain flakes of any kind really you you can put banana in it and turn it into a reasonable meal um not just what was it upgrade plantains and your benadryl and your allergies and what you power through avocado i'm also allergic to i went down to florida one time and i was staying with this girl for like three or four days and you know i'm trying to be i'm on my best behavior here trying to make a good impression we're hooking up and everything i've already sealed the deal but like i like this. I'm not trying to be cool cop.

We go into a, like Chipotle or some shit. And, uh, uh, I ordered this burrito and I get guac on the burrito and we're eating it in there. And I'm trying.

So I'm trying to eat with my mouth closed. You know, obviously I'm kind of on a date here and I ended up biting my lower lip so severely that it bled a little, like I like touched it and there's like a little blood inside my mouth. And I was like, Oh, eat much idiot. Right. Well, I don't say anything. little. I touched it and there was a little blood inside my mouth and I was like, oh. Eat much, idiot?

I don't say anything, right? You don't want to know about your eating disorder. I'm like, oh, look at that. I bit myself and now I'm bleeding. Isn't that hot? I don't say anything. And the guacamole gets in the fucking open wound and it gives me a super allergic reaction. And my lips swell up like Eddiedie murphy and the nutty professor

when was this oh this is in a decade ago um okay okay remember the the it's the pka that i got like the hand job on you could like hear the girls like bangle bracelets jangling or whatever and somebody called me i thought she blew you i'm disappointed i mean i've had all sorts of relations during the show if i'm being honest but I think that was the situation half of which with women some of which girls they're not all just with Toby they all identified as women

and if it's straight in your mind you know close enough it's like that non-Euclidean geometry it's made for shapes that aren't flat it's so you can do math there exactly that's you getting off with the trans person in geometry. It's made for shapes that aren't flat. It's so you can do math there. That's you getting off with the trans person.

No, but I did. My lip was just awful. She's like, what the fuck happened to your face when I came out of the bathroom? I said, to the guacamole guy in the open room. It worked out. She didn't care, but that was one of the most embarrassing things. I got into a fight in the Chipotle bathroom.

Like, that guy grabbed your wallet. We better get out of here before he comes out. You don't want to see him. He's gross. That's less embarrassing than guacamole. I don't want to make you retell the poo story, but do you have any embarrassing date stories, Taylor? Like, something like that where, like... An embarrassing date story yeah

i'd have to give it some thought nothing's jumping out at me the the fallout of shitting in my high school girlfriend's house and having it overflow into the foyer to be seen by the whole family like the like the fallout like all the other embarrassing memories that would still be there in my head are that house from the 40s that just got just obliterated by the fallout of how truly embarrassing that was so i'd have to i'd have to because lots of embarrassing stuff has happened to me in my life tons but if it was like what's the second most or third most embarrassing thing i'd really have to mull it over because that is first place by so much i might have one so this one actually happened like two years ago i think i wasn't even like it wasn't a date quote unquote but it was a

date i could make it a little worse in that regard because it was it was a date with a girl i was already like dating right uh and my parents were there my father we were all we were all going out to this uh this uh going out to eat like lunch, lunch, dinner, something like that. I don't remember. But me and Cody, donut operator, had been going to this brunch place forever. Like, we have multiple fucking, you know, just during the week we go out to this brunch place. We plan videos. We kind of schedule our day and shit.

And they changed up the oil that they were using in the eggs. And so he just told me, like, two days prior. Like, it's the, like, yellow oil they use just for the color or whatever but they started using a fuckload of it and it's just like destroys your stomach and uh he told me a story a couple days later or a couple days earlier where he apparently just shit his pants in a fucking airport which is a terrible place to shit your pants that's great because you already have a change of clothes. That's true. Still embarrassing. Very embarrassing.

You're just sitting next to these people. But I made fun of him because he's a little older than I am. Like, oh, you're fucking getting to be an old man. You're already shitting your pants in public. Whatever. Not two days fucking later, I'm on this date, and I fucking whole ass shit myself. On the date? Grown ass. Oh, yeah. Oh, no. Did myself. On the date?

Oh no. Is it recoverable? It was recoverable. Can you go to the bathroom and take the underwear off and come back from this? That is what I did. Did it hit the pants? Did it go through the underwear? Not really. That's not a no.

It was oil. It was the same fucking oil. It was just like, oh God. I've never shit my pants my entire fucking life. Even as a kid. Never fucking happened. I have a question for Taylor. I shit my pants. Your dating life. I hope I'm not oversharing. I think this will be okay. Otherwise, I'd keep it to myself. You were once

talking to a girl. During your conversations before you met her she told you that she was going to use your skin to make a lampshade did you decide to meet her anyway i don't believe so no no that was a showstopper for you there's some there's some stuff that's just weird where we're like and if i recall that conversation i think it was like both of us trying to actually no i think we did go on a date because it was both of us like doing like weird like like a lot of girls will do that thing we're like i hope you're not a serial killer and then you'll like respond in a playful jokey way like yeah like if i was you think i'd give away the the

recipe for it right here you think i'm stupid exactly this and then this and then this like specific things and then like oh then this? Like specific things and then like, oh, well, I'm going to, you know, make a lampshade out of your skin.

Like whatever it is. That's just like jokey. For a second, it took me a second to remember that. I enjoy, as long as you're, you're like playful

and fun, that stuff. Don't open with, I'm a not, I'm a serial killer. Lol. Like don't, don't tell me how to riz.

Three out of ten times. Three out of ten times it works every time. Yes. Woody got married very young. Several decades ago. I like to catch Woody up on what modern dating is like because I feel like you're always wow, really? Right away?

Yeah. Tonight? One of the things, and Taylor, I'm sure you're always, wow, really? Right away? Yeah, that baffles me. And one of the things, and Taylor, I'm sure you've done stuff similar to this. If you're trying to get a young lady to come to your household and you haven't met her before, there is some sketchiness to that, and I understand it. So I'll be like...

Why would our houses be sketchy? Because he's got a sex swing and fucking... Well, I mean, the real thing is you go into a strange man's house that you've never met before to hook up and and you don't even know if these pictures are for sure him maybe like who knows what kind of ghoul is luring me to this house in a cul-de-sac somewhere right and i'll i'll point that out to them i'll say look tell your friend that show him my picture and like here's here's my fucking driver's license and shit. Look, this is me. Now, if you Google me, you'll see some rough shit.

Ignore all that. Watch the video though, they're cool. Anyway. I'm trying to go back to there. Like, you don't meet them like in public, like at a restaurant first to kind of feel them out and say, do you want to get drinks at my house or whatever? It's like, that's up to them. But I'm perfectly fine with you just showing up at my house.

Like, if we've been chatting for a of hours and you're a cute girl and come over, you know, and maybe if my Tinder looked like yours, then yeah, I, I think you, you look great.

Like you look great in that fight too. I, we didn't touch on that much, but it's a, there's a lot of ways you can go into one of these like a celebrity boxing matches and like, you can come out looking silly or embarrass yourself. And it like yeah he won but man he really should have knocked him out i thought you looked great i thought that was a that was a win all around for you i went sober

for six weeks and trained basically almost every day because i i had six weeks notice on that fight which is not enough no i went up to my my trainer uh who was fantastic fucking shout out matt uh but he uh him and eli uh trained me up and my god they were was fantastic. Fucking shout out, Matt. But him and Eli trained me up. And my God, they were just like both when they were like, you're fighting when? You're going to my house right now. We're sparring today. Yeah.

Fix your diet starting this. Yeah, that makes sense. Like immediately just start sparring. There's no time to be doing anything. This isn't Rocky Balboa, right? Like you got to learn to block a punch or like not get. I don't know anything about boxing other than apparently it's not real most importantly gano just wouldn't be the heavyweight champion of the world i hated that that that sucked but well realistically with sparring the

biggest thing is to to learn how to get punched in the fucking head and not turn away so like you can tell somebody hasn't sparred because they get into the ring and as soon as they start taking punches to the face they turn around because like you're trying to hide your face like it's just an instinct thing everybody fucking does it they've never sparred yeah yeah that's a big sense that's why i would never want to box someone that just seems like such you've never done it at all like not even a buddy oh like like like full-on guard and we're yeah no like i did wrestling and like i would do that like but no and i wouldn't be outside a hotel one night that's how i did i was i was like you know every time i agree to one of these little backyard matches i i run up against someone with a lot

more experience than me it seems like i had no idea that woody was some sort of a ninja with a blue belt or something and he just just like bit me into a pretzel a dozen different times over the years. But Taylor double-legged me outside a hotel one night. And I was seeing stars. I hit the back of my head on the ground. Joe Lozon has to get him off me. I'm like, Taylor's an animal. I was getting a little revenge for you putting me in that fucking cart at Walmart.

Oh, God damn. What is it? The curb. And I flipped out of it. Yeah, that was I could have been injured. You got into a shopping cart that I was pushing jackass. Now you kind of signed a waiver when you hopped in. Yeah, we weren't as close as a man at the time.

That was like 12-13 years ago yeah we just had met I think I think the first time I met you is when you went out on the ice at Boston it was weird I don't even know why you went out there you just ran out on an ice rink you told me to oh did I? was there a woman on it or something?

what did you run on the ice? there was a me, you, Blade,yle and then trevor uh maybe jericho a big gaggle of people and i think it was kyle because obviously like i was like oh blade woody kyle like these are all big deal guys and i think kyle made a passing comment because we walked past this ice rink and there was just one guy out there like scraping it not like a zamboni just like pushing it to clean the ice and it was probably 10 at night and i think kyle said like that'd be funny if someone just got on there and started running around and so i immediately got on the ice and started running around the other side of the rink or something yeah and i ran over and

run back touch the others i ran over got to like the midway area and then the scraper guy was clearly not, he didn't think it was funny and so then I went back almost slipped over the railing on the way back and I believe you caught me you kept me from falling there I'd never seen an outdoor rink before

so I thought it was cool I'd only seen indoor rinks before in Atlanta I'd love to go skating on an outdoor rink again. It's so much nicer. It's just fun. Have you ever played on an outdoor rink? I have. Yeah. Me too.

It's a terrible daytime game when you're a goalie and the sun is in your eyes. Does it glint off the ice at all? Yes. And it's just coming at you. So it was like 2 p. at all. Yes, it was like it was and it's just coming at you. So it was like 2 p.m. And I remember being like getting into my crease and it just like the beam like God was looking at me just right on my crease. Just exactly. And so every time they'd come down to shoot for like a 10 minute, 15 minute window, it's just, oh, come on, just just have a bad shot. Shoot it into me.

They probably scored. They probably scored pretty easily. I played at night in the outdoor rink, and it was so foggy you couldn't see to center ice. Like it was, I don't know what the physics are there, but yeah, it was outrageously foggy, and it couldn't be cured. That's kind of fun.

Like playing out, if there's no stakes on the game, playing outdoors is a bunch of fun. The quality of ice is also- This is beer league hockey. Maybe stick and puck. It matters, Taylor. You're right. stick and puck it matters taylor you're right you're right you're i mean you're running for office in texas so i imagine little hockey experience uh absolutely none i've i've tried to ice skate before and i am just embarrassing i was

i tried it as a kid i think i had to have the old man walker kind of shit because i just couldn't figure it out i only maybe tried it twice skating was that one thing like when when we'd have like a roller rink party in like grade school or an ice skating party in grade school or middle school whatever we had those like i always loved that because it would be like yes like i can kind of i can kind of flex a little bit on all the other eight-year-olds because I know how to hockey stop. When did you start? Eight years old? I started roller when I was five,

and then I switched over to ice when I was seven and then kept doing ice. Yeah, usually hockey, you start pretty early. And you don't want to be the kid that shows up as a 10-year-old and has never played ice because you're going to get absolutely bullied. I'm shaking my head because I'm thinking baseball. We we started like t-ball like right away like four five like yeah i know for sure we were at home playing baseball at four that my earliest memories are

like hitting wiffle balls and shit at my dad you know what i mean i remember like t-ball and everything like that that's just kind of a southern thing now i'm sorry if you guys have already talked about it i don't remember when it happened well it's all just a southern thing i think no we got we got t-ball i thought that was like where you start you know that like like you know level one baseball i was the worst i used to strike out in t-ball my parents would be my mom anyway would be in the stand just like please just let him hit it let him hit it and have it go towards the other people he doesn't need to get on base or anything. Just don't strike out. It happened all the time.

I stood the wrong way. You know how you stand and you sort of hit this way? Not me. I'm like this, facing everyone, giving it a go. Ah, open stance. All right. This man's trying to get a base hit. He's going to push one over there. That's on your coach. That's on your coach.

You're a high-level player. You had instincts. Man, it's a shame that they didn't bunt it yeah but with uh have you guys already talked about that uh dude who got fucking killed on the ice the other day yes yeah we talked about it briefly taylor misinformed our audience yes the goriest sports injury or death of all time it it come it encompasses both there is no more gory instance I've ever even heard of for a professional sport. He died, and you see him coming

off, and you see his face is so white. You see the man's face. They zoom fucking in because they don't know. I'm sure they wouldn't have zoomed in if they'd known. Yeah, they shouldn't have zoomed in on that. Yeah, that was horrible. Is it available to find online? Oh, yeah. It was everywhere. Yeah, it was horrible. Is it available to find online? Oh, yeah. It was everywhere.

Yeah, it was rough. It's available. What seems to happen is the guy seemed like he threw his leg behind him in an effort to prevent the I think he was the puck carrier from going towards the goal like he wanted him

to. Yeah, but he didn't like, yeah, like what he was saying i misinformed the the patrons which i did oh no no i because uh the first day i they only had the version of the clip where you could see like all the blood and gore so i only watched it through like twice and so during the hangout i was i was like oh i'm sure it's just like a total accidental thing wouldn't mean to kill like you would never mean to kick somebody in hockey what are you crazy? And then they clipped it down to where the gore was out of it.

And the next day I ended up watching like a hundred times trying to like ascertain what exactly had happened. And after like just a few watch throughs of that, because I was able to actually pay more attention when I wasn't dreading the gore and the death. I was like, oh, no, no this guy 100 intended to kick like he intended to kick him like you do not raise your leg that way in a hit ever uh there's a reason there that there haven't been anybody posting clips of similar incidences like they'll post clips of like hey here's other times that the skate goes high up and it's like yeah that guy got hit in the here's other times that the skate goes high up and it's like yeah that guy got hit in the back into the bench that's why his feet came up yeah this guy got hit in the back and his feet came up the way physics works kick isn't the word i'd use

though right like he was hoping to put his shin in that guy's path like kick to me is something you do with your toe if but if he wanted to put his foot in that guy's path it would be a normal tripping and he would have reached out backwards towards the guy's shins this guy raised his leg deliberately and kicked him in his upper body so like it it's a very clear that he intended to kick he didn't mean to i don't believe he meant to kill him but he did mean to kick him he put his leg in front of the guy like a turnstile would in an effort to stop him there. That's what I thought I saw, but you saw it differently. Yeah, well, it hits so much higher than that on his body.

Like tripping is a very common, as you know, like play in hockey as a defenseman. Because what the play was is that the guy who killed him was the defenseman. And he was attempting. He had missed his coverage, and he was attempting to keep that guy from entering the zone. And usually you would take a bad penalty, like slash and break a stick or kick back, which he shouldn't have even taken a fucking penalty there. There was plenty of time to recover that play.

And he instead used, like he lifted his left leg up to the guy's upper body and kicked him. And that is beyond the pale like that doesn't have like there's i've seen lots of clips in the past week or few days of people showing like hey here's what some of the other incidences like clint malarchuk or zed nick or these other people who have been cut by skates and they're all wildly different like do you think when he comes back like that'll he'll be like he'll be like yeah don't fuck with me you saw what happened to so and so you'll be next like you like that kind of enforcer like i'd be afraid of that guy right yeah hopefully he's

never allowed back into any competitive league at all hopefully he's banned for life oh yeah you cannot kick people i want him for my team like if i'm that kind of guy like if i'm trying if i got one of those beer league hockey teams or whatever that we're trying to to keep going your league you want that guy get me that guy get me jose the killer montoya like get me him yeah no i i hope that guy can never step foot on the ice and play in a professional game again probably not probably i'm over here wondering if he's gonna get charged with manslaughter he might like i don't know how it'll end up panning out but like was it in england it was in the english leagues i don't know what their laws are but like right i don't think he and i would be shocked if he intended to

to kill that guy i think that's far-fetched but he intended to kick him and the result of the kick was he died right which is why it's not murder but like but still manslaughter i mean like you hurt the guy i don't know what their laws are yeah yeah i don't know how they do it there but like it's it's a it's a fucked up clip like you you watch and you're like okay like i like i i went through without the gore one and i was like i much to watch it like not exaggerating a hundred times i'd be like all right let me see if he catches an edge let me see if his stick pulls him into it let me see if he falls into this and it's like there's there's a reason there's no other clips or examples being posted of like see here's the time that uh colton pareko lifted his left leg into the

torso of an opponent and like and it's like no that that does not happen like you you don't do that it reminds me of that famous clip where the guy same thing where he got his neck slit and he's like just grabbing his fucking neck yeah because apparently that guy survived clint malachuk survived yeah he was a goalie and it was someone got knocked over and went into him skates first so very different scenario there and then a lot of the other ones are his medic was special i feel like i want to talk about that part right i think maybe someone knows better than me but his the medic the team doctor these guys these nhl teams have doctors on the bench was a vietnam vet who had had some experience with similar injuries so he went in there and

like pinched off the jugular or carotid i don't know yeah same thing they're just like one's the blood vessel and one's the um one's the vein one's the artery thank you yeah You want to keep them both intact. Last night on TNT. I think it was last night on TNT that this came up briefly, like during the hockey game. And even Gretzky, like, obviously, they're not going to go in on it totally. But Gretzky, like very deliberate. It was like, yeah, the so-called accident.

Like he. Yeah. If you like, if you watch that and you've seen all the ways that people get clipped with skates generally people get clipped with the toe or the heel of the skate because they're falling forward or falling back this guy got caught with like the middle of the skate blade like it's it's a very it's it's tragic like he literally died when you talk when you said that people would not wear the neck guard i imagine like a big hans device like this big fucking darth vader shit it's literally a kerchief made of kevlar yeah like yeah throw that

boys it'll keep your neck warm it's like the old body armor that they used to put like that you could button it on to both sides of like a kev vest. It was just like a little Kevlar protector that they give to people. Zach, can you show a picture of it? To me, it looks like a sandbag tube that you wear around your neck like a collar. Does that sound right? Yeah. I saw kids. They're itchy, and they are uncomfortable.

I remember that my dad would try and make me one when i was playing goalie and like any time that he wasn't at the game i wouldn't wear it because i hated it and there was also like a perceived thing of like you're kind of lame like for for wearing it i had two issues uh one was it made me hot i'm a player who gets hot a lot i didn't wear a shirt under my shoulder pads or anything. It was just shoulder pads and jersey. That smelled great. Yeah.

Yeah, you'd lose that fat. Rancid. I did store it in the garage to dry out. Pressure wash it off at the beginning of the season. But yeah, so I got really hot. And that neck thing, that turtleneck is actually what makes me warmer, so I didn't like it. The other issue, maybe even as big a deal is it was uncool and even as like it's a grown-up and beer league hockey it's

like everyone's gonna think i'm a pussy if i wear this there's no one else wearing i mean that kid looks like a pussy if we're being honest right i'd bully the shit out of that kid he's gonna get he might get bullied but i guess it's probably required now. That kid's name is like Kirsten or something. That's like half a girl's name. Random attack on the field. That's full. Yeah, but you can tell from his hair that he's a gamer. He's good. I was going to say that, Taylor.

I spotted the hockey hair also. Yeah, hockey hair, you can tell. He's got flow. He's probably got dangles. He's dominating all the other 12-year-olds, however old that kid is. Yeah, but I remember these ones. It's probably got dangles he's dominating all the other 12 year olds however old that kid is yeah but i remember like uh like these ones probably literally hero hawk zach bring up the the plexiglass ones that goalies would wear hanging off their mask back in the day like my dad like kind of held my feet to the fire on it was like you either have to wear this which like i felt was like total goober mode because like people would make

comments like on my own team and be like, Oh, you're wearing a neck guard. And I, I should have at the time been like, I'm the fucking goalie, bro. Like that kind of shit.

Uh, no, that's a face mask. But, it's large, clear and that is tied to the bottom of your mask and it just hangs off your chest here. They used to wear them.

Yeah, exactly that. That thing there, uh, usually a little more, a little clearer than that. That's a low quality helmet. your mask and it just hangs off your chest here they used to wear them yeah exactly that yeah that thing there uh usually a little more a little clearer than that that's a low quality helmet but like that i thought was like it was more accepted as like cooler and so my dad let me get away with that one uh and then a time came when i was like 12 that i just stopped wearing them at all and everything was fine but every once in while, like you'd go down to make a save and like you knew it was coming either towards your head or your upper chest

and the puck would like clip just the bottom of your face mask and you'd have kind of like, because if the puck hits you in the face mask really hard, like it jams the whole thing into even maybe your nose, your chin, like all that. And like I even at like 11 have a realization of like, that could have just hit me in the throat which like it's just another 11 year old shooting it but it's a fucking piece of vulcanized rubber

it's hard in the league i played in face masks were optional there's two kinds there's one that's made out of really strong wire that we call a cage and the other is uh like a plastic shield that goes in front of you anyway every single game something would happen that made me glad I was wearing it. It might be I get hit with someone's stick, a puck. It might be somebody else who doesn't have it loses a tooth or half a tooth or something like that. And I was just like, fuck, cages are for good looking people. Oh, yeah. Like men's league, it reverses where you see a guy in men's league going around like he's chris pronger

with no face mask on at all you're like that guy's an idiot like an a true blue moron you're not a tough guy you work at the bank like you stop it like you you want to have a big scar you don't have nhl i think it's cool until he eats one i think it's cool until he eats one because up until that point i just believe that he's like a pitcher and he can just pop, just fucking catch that thing every time. I'm with Kyle. And also it's cool if he's good, right?

The people that didn't wear cages in my league were in like the AHL two years ago, you know, or they're like 48 now, but they have time in the NHL. And, uh, it's like,

yeah, well fucking, of course that guy's not wearing a cage he he didn't play with one his whole career i mean me on the other hand i have a mortgage i i came from like a parenting style right where you were a fucking pussy if you wore a helmet on your bicycle so like that's the context but at the same time this is a contact sport where you have ray everybody's got a goddamn razor on their feet yeah yeah i get it i get everybody has sticks too which like like very like day one hockey

lessons is like you have like five-year-olds six-year-olds wearing razor blades on their feet and like holding a weapon and so like they drill into your head like skates are always always stay on the ice stick always stays on the ice and like what's usually the problem for young kids is the stick because they'll get to skating and like not realize they're swinging it around like a lunatic and like scoop it up into someone's like under their face mask and hit them in the eye or the nose or something right and so you have to really drive that into kids keep your skates down keep your stick down this isn't fucking soccer which i remember i say that because that is what a uh coach said to me like this isn't soccer like get like you know

be be safe out there not ripping on soccer a fine sport i don't know the rules i'm not familiar with fucking sport fucking savages um not everyone's manly we talked about yeah uh fucking run around on that big fucking field, you lazy bitches. You lazy bitches. If there's one thing soccer players are not, it's lazy. Yeah, look at their GDP in those countries. I'm going to talk about the Fury fight, though.

Okay. Because, man, did you watch it, Brandon? I did. That was really – the decision on that was so shocking. I wasn't shocked at all. Really? I felt strongly Francis had won, especially when he got the knockdown. That's 10-8.

But I know boxing judging. We always talk about this here. We're not boxing fans. We're fans of everything about boxing except for the matches themselves and the judging that takes place afterwards um the same thing happened to conor mcgregor when you know he won several rounds he lost the fight but he won several rounds um and there were there were some rounds where floyd threw like four punches and connor threw 18 it's like you gave that to floyd Like the fix is in, cocksuckers.

Like you're not even trying to be a real sport. But Ngannou clearly won. He outboxed him for several rounds, certainly more than Fury got the best of him. And he was always the guy who was hurting someone. Like Ngannou never looked injured to me. Even when Fury threw that big right elbow and clipped him on the brow,

he just ate that. Meanwhile, they got in a clinch once, maybe second round, and two or three quick uppercuts, and Fury's bleeding. I was like, he's bleeding? That's what happened. Yeah, before the knockdown, when I saw his nose bleed, I was like, oh, he wasn't supposed to get a nose bleed during during this fight he wasn't supposed to really get touched it was supposed to be like harlem globetrotters like running around him and make him look silly kind of shit like some meme stuff and he's hurt that like like you can see him like checking the he's like yeah i'm fucking bleeding god damn it i was like ah he'll pull it together now he blooded his nose he's embarrassed a little he'll pull in tight work his jab circle around point fight him it'll be over no knock the fuck down the next round it was it was a fun fight to watch it was one of my favorite boxing matches

i guess i've ever watched because i expected so little and got so much and i wasn't shocked at all when they gave it to fury i i would have been there's no way they were going to get done gone in gone because they already brought they already brought fury's next opponent there to the match like they're they're they're setting up the next big one while they're doing he'd have to knock him out to win there's a thing in boxing and being the world champion is a little bit political i don't know how many boxing belts there are they're five seven something like that and sometimes you can't have them all they'll be like you know woody you have to defend your belt against kyle or we're going to strip your belt and some other organization will be you have to defend it against taylor or we're

going to strip your belt and it's like well fuck what are we going to 2v1 you know i i have to take one of these belts and dump it in a trash can i'm just out of luck so that happens but then there's something called the lineal champion and that gets a lot of respect in the boxing world this is that you can go all the way back to the very beginning and say this was the heavyweight and then he got beat by this guy and he got beat by this guy and he got beat by this guy he retired and they had i forget how they handle that but there's a way and right now tyson fury is the lineal champion yeah even though he didn't put his belts on the line and ganu would have been the lineal champion which matters if he had won he should update it and just say he is it should

be his twitter i'm almost sure he said that i almost positively said that on the ariel hawani so he's like it feels good today i am the linear heavyweight champion of the world is that what he's down to yeah, he's Nigerian. Cameroon, right? Is that in Nigeria? No. I think Kyle might be right. Big world out there.

Yeah, it's like French Cameroon. Something like that. Oh, he's French? French Cameroonian. Yeah, he's French. I don't know why I thought he was Nigerian. They don't even know exactly how old he is. He's one of those guys.

He's about to come for the Little League World Series title next year. Dude, he could be a super athlete in anything, I bet. He just looks like he's made in a laboratory or something like that. So I was pretty down on him. I think he got his $10 million. That's all that matters. And he won all all that respect too and the whole boxing yeah and the whole boxing world has got to be looking themselves like oh that's an embarrassing one that is not what that's a bad look for us and that what happens next either fury goes and what and fights this usic guy or he rematches in ghanu and

that's what everybody's gotta want i want the ingano rematches Ngannou. That's what everybody's got to want. I want the Ngannou rematch. Let's fucking run it back, dude. What, do you need to get in shape? No, you're in shape. Pair. Let's go. Fury is going right into this next fight, I thought.

He was contractually obligated to do it in December, but I'm almost sure they're going to push it to February or March or something like that. I think Francis I said it wrong the other day. I said that Francis' PFL opponents get a guaranteed $2 million. It's a guaranteed $1 million. I had heard two. I think he asked for two and got one. Maybe. You're going from your $300,000 with Dana to $10 million. $600,000 was his best ever but yeah oh 300 300 probably

though right maybe i don't know yeah i think he got 300 300 like he really got so in boxing as you guys know a lot of times they lie about the purses it's part of their like promotion they're like rappers almost you know i made 30 million dollars last fight um i wonder what he really made i heard the pay-per-view buys were awful i heard the pay-per-view buys were awful. I heard the pay-per-view buys were under $10,000. That's really bad, right? It is atrocious. It's lower than an average boxing night, like a regular WEB or whatever.

It's lower than that. I think Wings and Boogie beat that. You could probably put on a big jiu-jitsu tournament and get more than... Gordon Ryan could do jits against GSP. Way more than $10,000 buys. Just fucking jiu against gsp way more than 10 000 buys just fucking jujitsu tournament alone um so that's a stinker but the thing is what yeah you've got you can't look at you have to look at this fight in a vacuum the saudis funded this shit they poured liquid money

into this from every orifice so that so the numbers i saw was 55 to 65 million quite the visual yeah yeah certainly my anus is being burned by molten gold yeah you're like even even then the even just the people that the saudis were paying to show up how much you had to pay him and them to fly to fucking saudi arabia do you know how much money him and them has i know one other i can't say who it is but it's another big youtuber and big boy big boy they offered him like two million show up ronaldo was there um kanye was there what do you pay kanye to fly to saudi arabia i i don't know it's got to be something absurd um and then the fight uh was a ridiculous performance i hated all that horse shit that got put on there was some sort of light show that they everybody pretended like was cool i don't know they had some big glowy box thing that did some special effects it wasn't cool

i thought i come on let's go i i've seen a light show before you don't like a little pomp and circumstance uh no i really hated the they had like some british rappers or something like that come out and that shit's always lame as fuck. Like, rap with a British accent doesn't work. Like, you aren't hard. I know you're not. Like, what do you do? Like, kitchen knives? Butter knives.

I'm from America. We have real gangsters here, okay? Like, you're not a real... You can't gangster rap me with that English accent. It's true. I didn't think about that. You got Fitty Quid, who was stabbed seven times. Yeah, I've been Fitty Quid.

I have 50 quid. 50 pence. You're going to pull out a brin gun like it's lock, stock, and two smoking barrels. But the numbers that I read was Ngannou got 10 mil. Fury got like 60, 65 million. And the event, as far as pay-per-views, would lost you know like 180 200 250 million or something like that you know i bet i bet they poured a quarter billion into this event but by the time they flew everyone in did all that media mike tyson i i heard got they were like i heard mike tyson was paid handsomely and every time you see Mike Tyson, he's just like, I'm so happy to be here.

He's just so happy to be there. He's got a nice new suit on. Everybody's kissing his ass. They made him Ngannou's trainer. Come on. Mike Tyson's never trained anybody his whole life. He's never done that. I'm so stupid. I believed it for a bit.

Like for a couple of days. I like Mike, so I will believe it. I'll believe it. Maybe he told him don't get hit in the head out there. He might actually... Great advice. Does anyone write this down?

Gus told me this right before he died. Don't bite them in the ear. Like what? What you have to do is knock your enormous amount of, uh, natural talent. Yes. Like,

like that's probably the same reason that like Gretzky sucked at coaching is because he was like, just see the game perfectly. Guys, let's do that. Mike Tyson, dude, even like,

even when he was like 15, 16 was a fucking animal. Like his old, like it's like 15 year old fighting mike tyson looks like a grown-ass man yeah i think it was pre-economics who talked about the birthdays in hockey do you i'm telling you probably heard this before right the birthdays okay this is how it started this uh dude went to a minor league hockey game right this is like right below the nhl and they had a flyer

pamphlet or something that showed all the players and something like 90% of the players were born in January and February. Oh yeah. So they looked into this and it turns out that these people were the oldest people in their grade, which meant they were kind of the biggest and strongest people in their grade. And growing up, they were always the best players. They were always getting the lion's share of the coach's attention. They were always the ones that carried their team. And we were just talking about Mike Tyson, where he was a beast at 15 years old. I wonder if he didn't become a beast until he was like 21,

like most people get their adult body somewhere around there, beast until he was like 21 like most people get their adult body somewhere around there if he wouldn't have gotten the same kind of shine rise coach's attention etc to turn him into mike tyson because he wasn't an early bloomer you know i feel like some people are just so far beyond everyone else like they'll do it regardless and like i'm not a boxing expert or even a casual viewer i go so far as to say i know nothing about but like my understanding of him is like he's like the great he was the youngest heavyweight champ ever but he didn't have a super long career you know it got interrupted by prison or because his head wasn't on straight yeah legal stuff is just one part of it i is he the guy

who said it's hard to win fights when you go to sleep in silk sheets it's hard to get up at 4 a.m and run when you go into bed in silk sheets yeah tyson uh tyson like that mental it's not like tyson's body ever failed him and his fighting style didn't didn't diminish or anything it it really seemed like it was the mental part of things his mental health and i don't know when his daughter died but that was a a real problem for him i think that was later in life when i think she dreamt may have drowned in a pool or something like something bad um happened to his daughter and it was a it was a real thing and then you know the rape conviction however you want to look at that i've've always thought, nah, I don't think so. I've always thought he was

innocent of that charge for whatever reason. He was convicted? I think you guys have told me this before. He spent time in prison. That poor rape. Jesus. Yeah. But like what he said, the youngest ever, and I don't know anything about

boxing either. Dennis Rodman though is an example of somebody who didn't pick up a basketball until he was like 20, you know he didn't play fucking high school he didn't play high school basketball he didn't play college basketball i don't think right he just he started in the nba college basketball i think he must have started in college right i know i don't know like ball at all as a kid that's insane i know yeah yeah yeah there's um there's a couple foreign players who have that and he was american i think but like i think joelle and b didn't start until he was pretty

late these guys are starting at like 15 years old but 2021 like like like correct me on that um zach like when did when did uh dennis rodman first start playing organized basketball of any sort i think kind of explains it he was. Amazingly, amazingly good as an athlete. Maybe one of the best defenders to have ever walked on this planet. And a great diplomat, as it turns out. But he couldn't shoot. He never scored. All he did was get rebounds. And his rebound numbers were inflated, but still good. I mean, Jordan, I guess, wanted those numbers that he was producing or he wouldn't have kept him on the team for three championships, right?

It's just that any time he and a teammate went up for a rebound, he would take it from the teammate. The entire team knew rebounds were Rodman's thing. Ooh, I like that. It's just that it's inflating stats is what it is, right? Like you can't deny it. Who got the rebound? But I gave it to him.

I gave it to him because he's cranky if I don't. Who got the rebound? Dennis Rodman got the rebound. Damn right. That's what you're going to say with coach ass too. I feel like, and maybe this is uninformed. No, it's not. It's correct.

I feel like I could coach in the NBA. I'm sure you could. As long as I had like, because I've seen enough clips where like, like a coach tells LeBron to do something and then he's just like, oh, that's interesting. I'm actually the best player to have ever played. I'm going to do what I want to do. And so, you know what I would be? I'd be the hype man for my team coaching. I'd be like, like some other, some fucking white guy would be like, can I play coach? And I'd be like hype man for my team coaching. I'd be like some fucking white guy would be like,

can I play coach? And I'd be like, LeBron, can Jared play? And he'd be like, no. And I'd be like, I'm sorry, Jared. It's not in the stars for you this year. This is team LeBron. Then I get interviewed afterward, and I just continue to be like, we got a great team.

We got a hard-playing team. I have nothing but respect for my opposing coaches, the opposing team. We have to come out and play hard. have nothing but respect for my opposing coaches, the opposing team. We have to come out and play hard. We don't take any of this for granted. Just coach baseline shit. They're like, what do you think about the new 3-2 defense? I'm like, I don't get involved in the X's and O's.

I'm not that kind of coach. I'm more of a vibes guy. I'm in a mixtape. That is the plot of Ted Lasso. And I know you'd love that show. I wish you both would watch Ted Lasso. I keep meaning to mixtape. That is the plot of Ted Lasso. And I know you'd love that show. I wish you both would watch Ted Lasso. I keep meaning to try it out. He hurts me.

I feel so bad for him. Somebody falls down, skins their knee, and nobody helps him. I don't feel bad for that because I don't know what that guy's life's like. Maybe it's good. But I know this Ted Lasso guy has a pathetic life behind the scenes, in front of the cameras, in front of his friends and family. I watched one episode, and what I gleaned from that is that he is the most pathetic man I've seen on television in a long time. He's got that one assistant coach who seems like a nice guy, too. They're cut from the same cloth or whatever.

But God, I don't want to see him have to slowly earn these pieces of shit, love and trust or whatever. Like they don't deserve him is my thought process on episode one. And so I wish that he would like give them botulism in whatever weird British drink they drink before they go out and play there. I was going to, I don't, I won't use any slurs while you're here,

Brandon, while they play, while they play soccer, fire away. If they've made it two hours in or an hour and a half in there they're doing okay god rhymes with maggot you're not wrong kyle like i see where you get that i feel bad for that guy so much because he's great his poor wife too i'm like come on dude i'll get you some pussy we'll find some girls

more gets revealed oh i can tell she's a cheating whore this always bothers me in shows like that is when the wife is a bit like breaking bad or any of that shit like i hate the fucking wives in breaking bad it's easy to hate skylar and then you rewatch breaking bad and you're like she has some points but well wait wait wait skylar gained weight during that show and that's when i fell back out of it. I was like, if you're going to be bitchy about this, you can't be fat. Right. Exactly.

Right. If you're going to start twisting the knives on our fucking relationship, you better be a smoke show. Yeah. Walt's got that svelte cancer body, and she's blowing up, finishing his dinner every night. Walt will tread her every year, and she's over there eating. He should be like, like oh i didn't realize

we're having a third child food is for skinny people whore skylar was uh skylar was the actress that plays skylar was once one of jerry seinfeld's girlfriends i believe really really probably in like the 70s no no on the show on the show like oh you're right on the show yeah yeah um she did i saw this i saw one of those ai memes where they said uh like breaking bad if skylar had been the one to get cancer and it's just like rap music and everybody's partying and like money's everywhere and everybody's having guts and like everybody are friends like there's no drama thanks a lot of the acts are there and they're still alive hanks alive everything. Everything's good. The purple bitch.

I've only seen Breaking Bad once. I'm notorious for rewatching shows over and over and over. I love doing that. I like absorbing every little tidbit and background character and like catching that. Maybe you can see the camera here or the or the sound thing there. I've seen Breaking Bad once because I hate Skylar fucking white with every fiber of my being I hate her I hate her more than those people in code names who click the wrong button I hate her so fucking much um I when she took that money and fucking gave it to her boyfriend Ted I and Walt's in the ground crying where's the money we needed that you killed us or whatever i'm just like you should

have choked the life out of her right there well you should have choked the choked the life out of that woman right now and then go get some mexican killers and go get that fucker mike or whoever oh i was so upset i was so upset ted ted fuck ted i hated ted too but before we spend too much time on breaking bad i wanted to talk about the the politics thing with Brandon a bit more. What? Yeah. Since you started the running process and all of that, has there been any unexpected nonsense

or interest from media figures and stuff that you didn't anticipate or people trying to get backstories on you? How has that been? I imagine when you announce your candidacy for something like immediately like floodgates of inquiries start yeah so i i had a couple contacts and like i've been in the political realm before so like this isn't like a a whole new rodeo for me necessarily but uh definitely a lot of uh well so there was two different points where things got interesting. One was the initial announcement.

Obviously, that kind of like made a bit of a splash. The second one was when we released our fundraising numbers. Because when we first announced, then it was like, it was kind of like, okay, internet guy, ha ha, okay, he thinks he's going to make a run at it. They had no idea like the preparation we'd done. Like, I'm actually like, I've been in this world a little bit before. So like, this is, we knew what we were doing a bit i've got really good consultants i've got a couple of people that are that are they know what to be doing right now uh not to not make a joke out of this campaign um this and so we had you know the initial wave of inquiries and

everything right off the bat you know trying to get to get into the, the, the news cycle of it. The second bit was when we released our fundraising numbers and people went, Oh, fuck he's serious. Cause we, we fundraised. Uh, we, so there's two other primary to about two other real serious,

uh, primary challengers in, in this race. Uh, this time around, uh, we out fundraised both challengers combined by like 22 times over. Oh my God.

Shit. Yeah. They're in a bad place then that's awesome it's it's kind of it's been kind of wild and it's been no super pack money no big money on that because yeah i gotta know like how much money did you raise in two months of fundraising we raised over 200 or excuse me over 325 000 yeah that'll get her done all right that's that's in two months of fundraising in in q. I entered Q3 late. And so that's no super PAC money, no PAC money, no big donors, no nothing.

That is all just grassroots. And I'm going to throw in some of my own money as well. And so we're actually making a real serious bid at this. And it was really funny because, well, the one thing I will say, when we first actually announced, Tony Gonzalez had no social media presence. He would try to post on twitter or whatever like once every two weeks and then as soon as they found out oh god

this social media guy is oh god he's he's actually he just announced he's he's running all of a sudden he starts posting twice a day and posts a lot like at gun stores like look i support second amendment like no you don't fucker and i've just had people just harassing him it's been yeah i just looked him up this guy looks like a bitch dude if you if you and him got into a politics boxing winner take office i've challenged him yeah i said let's do it i'm like i'm down i'll do it for charity i'll do it for i'll do it for the gm box you for the 35th congressional district you know and maybe you'll raise enough money to buy your committee seat right

I need to get fucking Keem on the phone to zone everybody no but I mean there's some basis for that Teddy Roosevelt the great statesman boxer so Lincoln is a hall of fame wrestler and technically

and I did not know before I bought my match. Uh, I actually had to get licensed with the Tennessee Boxing Commission. Like everything was very formal. Like the commission watched us get wrapped up and everything. It was, it was a full thing that technically counts as a pro boxing record. So

technically speaking, I am an undefeated pro boxer. It's a great thing to throw on, you know throw behind a congressional campaign. You and Sam Hyde, two undefeated professional boxers. I feel like that's more legitimate than me being a professional dancer. No, they're both legitimate. They're technically both true. What is that?

Technically true, which is the best kind of true. You're undefeated in like youtube jets though uh i have rolled with joe lozano that didn't look good he doesn't count he isn't like a youtuber youtuber i mean and he's a fucking professional athlete like he's not even allowed to enter into that sort of competition i agree he doesn't count i saw he was trying to get a fight um a while back like not that long ago. A couple months ago, something came up. Forgive me, I don't remember the exact particulars, but it was

something that fell through and Joe was like, hey, put me in. How old is Joe? It was the Boston card. He won it on the Boston card. That's what it was. No, he's got to be either 40 or 39 would be my guess. 39.

Yeah, but I think he won it on the Boston card. 40 or 39 would be my guess. 39. Yeah. But I think he won it on the Boston card. And they're like, no, didn't get him on there. But I thought someone fell through, and that's why he was wanting the opportunity. But he should ride off in the sunset on that win he got. You know, that last time he was out, he smoked that kid. They put this kid in there that's supposed to be so good, joe goes in there and smokes him and like rides off in the

sunset i bet his he went he got to go home that night with a w and i bet his hands didn't hurt i bet it was a great win face wasn't swollen he got to go and like do the after party or whatever ritual he would want to do without you know blood coming out of his ass and stitches on his face. And the duty beat was legit. So the fight before that, the guy he beat he really shouldn't have lost to. It was kind of a, we love you Joe, we're going to give you a guy you can beat, and he didn't. And then the next guy,

it was like, that guy was an up-and-comer. He was supposed to make a name off Joe's legacy. It didn't work out like that. Joe beat him. And it's a really nice way to end your career. I never tell Joe, not that he would listen, what he should do with his career. I just support Joe. Whatever he does, that's the

right thing. But if he stopped on that win, it would be a glorious way to end it. I think there's fights for people of every... It's dumb that it just should go off a cliff at 40 for guys who haven't taken a ton of damage and um still want to compete at one level or another like

i'm fine with that i i kind of like that there's pfl out there and there's a one and there's a bare knuckle yeah you follow bare knuckle to follow i wouldn't say follow, but I know that Mike Perry is the fucking man. And I really like Mike Perry's internet. I was there for that video. Luke Rockhold. Luke Rockhold, sorry. Yeah, Luke's a friend of ours. And we went to go to Denver to go support him.

And that was, I think it was round two. And I didn't understand because I couldn't see from where I was sitting. I was pretty close, but think it was round two is when he and i didn't understand because i couldn't see from where i was sitting like i was pretty close but i still couldn't see like the damage he was taking see and then he showed later he had punched like one of his teeth got knocked out one of his teeth was protruding through his bottom lip yeah it was pretty bad he was just like bro i made my money walking into the fucking ring this sucks i want to go home that does suck do you not wear mouth guards in bare knuckle boxing? In bare knuckle,

there's no glove, obviously, and those knuckles will just go on into your fucking mouth. They'll just keep pushing the mouth guard. There's not this big, cushy thing to bounce off your mouth. Knuckles are hitting your teeth with just a millimeter of plastic. The mouth guard is usually

just the top teeth as well. So if you have your mouth slightly ajar, it's not hard. I think they have their hands taped, which is almost worse than bare knuckle, right? Like good. Because my hands a little protected.

I can hit you harder than I could with a bare hand. It's more too. It's a brace. Have you ever had your hands taped for fighting it or even just, um, I've taped them myself with like those wraps that are made to do it. Have you ever had your hands taped for fighting? Or even just... I've taped them myself with those wraps that are made to do it. The wraps? You feel comfortable...

I had Joe Lozon wrap my hands before practice one time. And he does it really well. It's really tight. He does it the way that his boxing coach does it. And he tells me this story. When he first met his boxing coach his name's steve he's like behind the scenes wrapping his hands and he's like there you go sleeping pills and somehow that like it was just what joe needed to hear i think it's why they became

lifelong friends so joe's wrapping my hands and he's like here you go woody got you some sleeping pills and i'm like yeah me and you joe birds of a feather but uh yeah when you wrap up your hands like that it feels like you can it feels like they're like rods you're hitting somebody with your knuckles are protected your wrist doesn't really flex like you just it's great if it's done well i don't do it that well taylor i always like to recommend uh like fighters for you to get behind like sean strickland i immediately love that guy i was pushing sean strickland like well before he became champ i was that guy's twitter is is a hoot it is so funny it's great consistently on random very politically incorrect things and it's hilarious yeah he'll just be like i'm done with political

stuff i saw this fucking homeless guy and then like just go off on things and it's hilarious. Yeah, he'll just be like, I'm done with political stuff. I saw this fucking homeless guy and then just go off on something else. It's just funny. It's good. I like it. I hope he keeps winning. Mike Perry's another guy you might like. I've mentioned him before. He's the guy who got his ancestry DNA back and he was 2.2%

sub-Saharan African. Now he thinks he can use the N-word. Jovially, never an abrasive or mean or offensive necessarily, from his point of view, kind of way. As the sort of just drops it.

There's this great internet video. He was at an outdoor bar restaurant type thing. He's being removed from the premises or asked to do so because of an argument that he's gotten into with some older gentlemen. He's leaving, but he's saying, Hey, you said you called the police. So I'm not, I'm going to wait out here because if the police come and a police report is written, I want my statement on it as well. You're not going to write up and get a bunch of witnesses together and put some paperwork on me while I'm down the road drunk. Like, no, I'm waiting.

But they won't let him say that as clearly as I just did. There's a lot of shouting and pushing. And this big, fat, older guy is getting way too close to platinum Mike Perry for his comfort. And he says something like, I'll knock you the fuck out, old man. And that guy sort of comes at him with the slappy hands of a man who's never been in a real fight before and mike perry goes and like knocks him the fuck out and drops him like a bag of shit right there and every woman who sees it does that scream that we all hate so much oh i mean i hope you hit the women genetically programmed into us to to like respond to that scream i'm sure there is right like If a woman screams, it's awful. He's laying there and looks like he's

fucking dead. And Mike Perry's like, it's what you get, ninja. And he goes and sits on a bench 12 feet away. He goes, I ain't fucking leaving. We're still waiting on the police. It's just great. So Kyle, you are speaking i think

i like braden's more you go uh that shockingly enough with the bare knuckle fights those are the fights i find most interesting those women beat the shit out of each other i because a lot of them don't have the power to do like an actual fucking knockout so they will go as long as the bout goes and by the by the like sixth round their face is just hamburger and you're just like please will somebody just fucking call this but you don't know who's winning necessarily i can see that's why i don't like it very entertaining it's too much for me um oh not me there were some guys in early mma who were like i really don't like seeing a girl bleed and i look i don't want to see her get massacred or anything when joanna uh jay check or whatever got that big hematoma on her forehead that time i wasn't like shying away because i knew she's a

fucking zach could you show us a picture of joanna jay check's forehead hematoma yeah it's something i remember this one i don't even know i know this one oh it's wild it was when she fought the uh the chinese chick it was a hell of a fight she the ideal picture would have a normal one next to it yeah yeah yeah the before and after she's got these just both eyes are swollen she's one of these girls she's not like no she was a champion she was i think she got a hot body and she got some fake titties. So she's leveled up. Her face is three out of ten. It is not a piece of art that has been massacred.

I disagree. I disagree. She has her angles and moments. I've seen pretty photos of her. But I don't like seeing those girls get just massacred like in the... Oh, fuck me. The pretty girl. That is the... Oh, fuck me. The free girl. That is the best she's

ever looked. Remember when Kyle said your quarterback was ugly or something? And Zach found the beauty. That Chinese bitch turned her into Megamind. It did. That's what people said. Yeah. That's what she really looks like.

She's just doing some facial treatment. Oh my god. The first Halloween costume I was looking at, I was like maybe I'll be Michael Jordan for Halloween. Because I found, and it wasn't even blackface, it was, I found a

realistic Michael Jordan mask. Yeah. They're like 2200 or something like you sent me the picture of you in blackface and i was like you at least have to put on a basketball uniform man yeah yeah you can't you should probably get rid of the white lips too i had a ball i figured it was just you know you you figure it out. But no, I do want to kind of, I really want to get one of those realistic masks. I have nothing to do with it, Taylor. I think you should get one because you do accents so fantastically. It would be worth spending two grand on an authentic Trump mask.

Like if you, you would look, I'm telling you, they're so fucking accurate. I was considering the Putin one because I can't pull off the Russian accent. If Trump wins again and it's realistic, then I'll or it's worth it, I'll say, because then I'll be all over the place. Oh, he's winning. He'll be back in the public eye. The Trump train's coming. The Trump trains are coming. I mean, the polls are out.

I mean, they look rough. He's at least winning the nomination for sure. That's not even a nomination. All those pictures, I don't even follow it closely, but I've seen all those photos of that fucking goober DeSantis walking around on lifts. In heels and lifts.

He's walking bow-legged, kind of weird, wobbly. Can you show us Ron DeSantis's shoes yeah like where they've like they've pointed out where his real foot would be yeah yeah how tall is he for real like real he claims five eight he claims five eight wait maybe you're right maybe he does claim five eleven i think you're right but he's like. Let's say he's five, eight for real. Yeah. Like it would be better for him to be like five, nine and a half, five, ten with regular lifts walking like someone like normally than to be five, eleven and be, you know, bumping around like an idiot. His shoes are always empty and it looks weird.

God, that is a terrible picture. That is that you can't see him. It's actually worse than that. It's so much. He found the most flattering picture of Ron DeSantis. He looks like he's a commanding presence, doesn't he? Yeah, there you go.

This is a better one. If you didn't have the super imposed yellow lines there, it does illustrate where his foot is, but it doesn't show how empty the foot box is. Where the toe is. Look at that. Oh, perfect. This is a great... Do you see these clown shoes where there's no

foot in there? Yeah. That upturned toe is wild. I appreciate how they put the location of an ankle there because I would be lost without knowing where the ankle bone is and all that. Yeah, that's hilarious. Look at the toe box. Look how empty it is.

There's no foot there. I don't know if it's just that. Did you see the one where they got him recently? It was like a couple days ago where he was mid-step, and you could just see that just with the crease of the foot. It would have broken his foot if his actual toes were in there. Why wouldn't he at least get a smaller size shoes? Oh, okay.

This is the one. This is the one, boys. Look at this. This is the one. This is the one, boys. Look at this. This is the one that started it. Look at the heel. Look at that ridiculous heel. It's like it's like tapered. It's like like, oh, my God, this is embarrassing.

This guy sucks. Yeah, that looks ridiculous. I actually I like DeSantis as a governor. He just chose a an awful time to run for president. This was just not the time. He had some really bad advisors. It's like, yeah, run against the most popular Republican of this century. That's a great idea.

Fucking banger. Yeah, that's probably not the move. Well, at the time. Because he's only like what? He's like in his 40s, maybe 50 years old. He probably should have pumped the brakes, been Florida man for a little while longer, and then jumped in later.

Or just be secure in your height, man. Just be confident and be in 5 eight or whatever you are i'd get that crazy uh asian surgery where they lengthen my shins if i were him like candidate myers what's he doing in china and then you have to be like i was getting the leg breaking surgery damn it if you must know no no i wanted to be six'5". Donald Trump called me Little Kyle and I couldn't stand it. I had to. That would be embarrassing. Trump's mean like that. He's like a fucking high school

bully. You literally see these grown-ass adult men who should be solid and not give a fuck what anybody thinks. All of a sudden, that high school shit comes back out and then they're insecure. They cower. they quiver. Joe Biden's taking, I'd take him out behind the school and whoop his ass.

It's like, I don't know. I think Trump could probably take you, Joe. And you're kind of pulling a boogie with me here where you're like, I'd take people out behind the shed all the time and give them a good old country ass whooping. No, I wouldn't even have to. I would just stare at them and they'd know.

Yeah, they just know. You hear about that story when Trump walked into a 7-Eleven and someone started macking on Melania? He just looked at him. Looked at him and shut him down. That's literally more believable from Trump than from Boogie, from an 80-year-old man like Trump. Oh, did you did you okay so you read into the boogie stuff right so so let me let me lay it out a little bit yes so boogie self released some sort of documentary about himself like and um when uh like this week and oh jesus

before it came out he tweeted he was like i'm literally shaking because i'm like nervous about what people are going to think about you know the my the documentary that i made about myself about myself tell all um the tell all about myself that i made and uploaded to my channel and taylor what was the thing that was so embarrassing and so terrible that boogie did uh there was a lot of embarrassing stuff in there and like it's not on his channel it's on some other guy like a documentarian's channel my bad and we're like at the end that he was like i've you know boogie wasn't compensated for this and all that but like the it leads off with like him talking about how he has no money he's broke he's like showing his bank account on his phone being like i've got two grand and i owe

170 000 on my house and then it does like that docudrama style thing where it's like boogie spent 200 000 over the course of four years on hookers prostitutes vacations and sugar babies it's called the dark sad life of boogie yeah yes it's another like you know and they like had a psychologist on there who's like this guy's just like addicted to self-pity like he frames everything and woes me and all that but like like there was some stuff in there that like made him look really stupid and shitty like the owing 170 grand on your house following his level of youtube success after blowing 200200,000. Yeah, that's the exact picture, $163,000 or whatever it is on his house.

Spending through $200,000. Because he's in a bath. There's so much of this documentary. So much of it, he's in a bath. He stole that from my video. Yeah, he stole it from your video with Wings. But he was in the bath a lot, which I hated. I wish the documentarian should like took him out of it.

Yeah, because it's jarring. It's the strongest bath. No structurally and on Earth. David Attenborough explained this. They see these large marine mammals. When they get in water, they become. He can't swim, but he can run swiftly across the bottom of the basin. You will never leave the water

permanently. He's a fucking hippopotamus. That's so funny. A North American pity whale. That's basically it. He's just a big fatty. It opens up. He's in the bath and his

20-year-old girlfriend like in the bath with him. And they're both wearing swimsuits because they're like doing this and that. And he and she's like crawling up on him. She's normal weight. Not a driver, though. Like how she look blonde. There was a part in there that she's like like her little backstory was like Jennifer or whatever whatever the fuck, did not have a father figure growing up. And I was like, that checks out.

Zach says she's 18. Oh, I thought it said, I think it's 20. I'm pretty sure 20 is what it said next to her name in the little. You calling Zach a liar? Maybe I misremembered it and she's 18, but I'm pretty sure it's 20. Because he's like 47, 48. She's 20. He's a big fatty.

And she was like climbing him like she was like someone was going to jump on Boogie's torso. And then she would fly off of his stomach into the lake, like ambling up on him. And like they're like doing a little kissing on the on the bat in the bath. And that was reprehensible. I hated it. Fucking bouncy castle yeah he's a 20 year old girlfriend and she seems like pretty like like she has her own litany of issues like was she fuckable that's what everyone wants to hear man like like you're skipping around here is she fuck oh is this a sexy young lady this is the over 18 right yes yes he's over 18 uh i mean boogie's fucking herself

damn it i'll have to see for myself like she's she is better looking than i could ever imagine someone like boogie being with would you swipe right on her i don't know i not if there was a bunch of troublesome back backstory not like not if i saw that bunch of troublesome backstory. Not if you saw that photo of her climbing on top of Boogie. Not if I knew that she had been with Boogie and that was her. Is she damaged goods? I don't know.

It seems like I'm not going to say anything negative about her. She's just someone in Boogie's shitty world. I didn't realize she looked like a victim now now that i've see that's what you say you're like you say i don't want to sexualize her frankly she looks like a victim to me kyle and then i stopped doing that now i look like an awful person no you've never looked like a piece of shit on this show ever you made it sound like

she was like a sexy prostitute anyway. Back to Holocaust denial. Let's cool off here for a bit and do a little 1940s math. Oh, shit. This is funny as fuck. Leave this up. This is our background for the rest of the show. Basically, and they also boogie did a

he made magic the gathering players look really bad which magic the gathering players don't need a lot to do but one part of the documentary i didn't like enjoy like he he has his like big gaggle of friends over for magic the gatheringing night or whatever. And they're all like big fat guys who play Magic the Gathering, clearly not used to being on camera. And like boogies sitting there talking to him, being like, Joe, we need to start bringing girls around here more. You haven't dated in forever. And Steve, when's the last time you were on a date, man?

And it's like these big fat guys who are like his friends who play magic with him and it's like this is this is not this picture can we talk about this picture a little more first of all zach pointed out her toes are as long as fingers that i had just seen this what is happening with like it looks like the dog's been photoshopped or cut off there his belly ends there where's her big toe there her big toe? They're in front of a green screen or they're using one of those onboard background blur things it looks like

to me. It just did a bad job. It makes him look like Pokemon. He looks like a Pokemon Machamp because he doesn't have a bottom half of his body. Geodude, so you're thinking up?

Or Geodude, yeah. There you go. I would say he's more of a Snorlax vibe. As I look at her, I think this is a person who probably won't get super fat as she ages. No. So a win for you, huh? I wouldn't think so.

I always say, Woody, hypothetical single you, you can do much better than this. That's all I'm saying oh thank you definitely but like she'd be hairy as fuck belly button hair everywhere the life i could have lived he talked about like sleeping with prostitutes and there was like even a like one of those interviews with a prostitute who like had the voice garble thing on like this. She was saying, I did sleep with Boogie2988 and there were a lot of folds and it took me quite a while

to find his penis. She didn't say that, did she? Yes. There's a lot of folds? A lot of folds and it took a while to find his penis. It wasn't just prostitutes like i was texting within our group chat up to chis and chis was like there's no fucking way he spent 200 grand on prostitutes in four years and i'm like well he's like rolling in like sugar

babies and vacations and all of that sort of stuff into it so like i could easily see that all while owing a mortgage and his youtube career falling apart by the way which is like bad bad planning for him. And it was like there were still a lot of parts of it where it was like kind of a woe is me kind of thing. He does like a shrooms trip to try and reset himself or something. And the dude who is like his shrooms guide was like, I can't believe that the best clips they had of that dude was what they put in there because the guy literally said at one point he's like yeah you just take

these and what it does is it resets yourself and i'm saying this much more cogently than he did he's like and after you're done all those atoms in your brain they go back to their original place and kind of reset and i'm like yeah all those atoms reset like that's how no he said atoms you said you sound like a science denier quite frankly yeah i don't trust the science and i don't trust that science that that was yeah the atoms is a scientific word but i didn't it didn't it didn't sound like shaman denial yeah he it would like throughout it he would like go to do something else and it would show his bank account and he'd be like i have to go to friday night magic because it's only 30 and if i don't show up then people are going to

assume i'm broke and that's too embarrassing and so i gotta go and then it like shows him leaving with his magic cards you know waddling out there and it shows like a graphic where it's like in red minus 30 new account balance 1906 or whatever what the fuck man well all right well that look is he still a friend of the show uh you know we don't dislike him like we don't dislike him but like what do you say when you know i'm not gonna pretend like this isn't wild and sad it's a bit salacious um and then we have like a joke at his expense to be fair you know yeah or 10 or hours of them was it when sam hyde was on because sam had that clip of himself on his show or whatever was with that other guy and the guy's like hey did you hear that boogie has cancer and sam just starts dying laughing he's just like yeah he thinks it's so funny it's like so that kind of led us down a road of being a

little negative i suppose when sam was here well he did have cancer right that was real am i right he did but he had uh basal cell carcinoma oh come on me the same one that you guys oh he went through he went through like a whole minute where he's like i'm gonna go through a list of everything that that's wrong with me medically and he was like talking about his medical bills and everything and like it was one of those broken out lists where it's like oh there's a huge amount of stuff on this list, but 80% of it is like a spinoff or a tangent of being morbidly obese. He's like, my blood pressure's high and I'm diabetic and this and that and this and that. And it's like,

you're, you're, yeah, you're my triglyceride. It's like, yeah, but you're splitting into a million things. What adds up to like,

most of this is being morbidly obese. And then in the middle of the documentary, not even making himself look better. He's like, I'm broke. I'm flat broke. I need five chicken quesadillas from Taco Bell. And then he would go and buy all those and and eat it. Wolf it down. Was he buying fast food like he was buying fast food?

Dude, it was a 55 minute documentary. I think he had fast food five times. You know how much a chicken quesadilla... Oh, this would be fun to throw into the trivia. I know every now and then they'll ask a politician a question. A really detached one. Like Hillary Clinton is a good example. Like how much a gallon of milk costs.

It's a real gotcha question if you don't know how much fucking milk costs. Rewind me. What were we just talking about the cost of? Fast food. A chicken quesadilla from Taco Bell. I went through the other day. I was like, one chicken quesadilla from taco bell i went through the other day i was like one chicken quesadilla please that bitch is eight dollars or something it was what what the fuck no wonder boogie's broke or dash or yeah yeah yeah i'm not going there no i yeah well boogie i am

so fucking addicted to door dash it's a it's a real vice i've got healthy places near me that have really good food like that cuban place i was talking about earlier is just i i love that shit um i usually order just fast food though the worst thing that ever that that happens with door dash is like sometimes i'll just i'll you know we'll be we'll be in we'll be you know just doing shit and i'm like okay let's order a case of claws or some you know you can order alcohol in tex. You just have to send your ID to the door dasher. It's happened a few times where they recognize me.

When we were doing it, like, oh, hey, man. I'm like, time to fucking move. You hate going out and buying burritos, don't you? You got recognized on Halloween? Yeah, one of these kids came by and was just like, hey, I think I recognize you.

I'm like, I have no clue what you're talking about, man. Have a good night. He came. Taylor had a sandwich guy once. I think I had a guy at the the pizza place recognized me. The only time in the last my adult life that I've like just been sad in the middle of the day and like pulled over and went into a pizza hut, sat in the little shame stool and ordered myself.

And then the dude behind it, like this cool looking guy, shout out. This guy was like Taylor from PKA. And I'm like, I'm surprised you don't get it more often. I got like, I got it a month or so ago at a grocery store.

Shout out the meat man, the butcher man there. I was actually with him. You got to a deal? I was there with my grandma, and I went up, and I was getting meat from the butcher guy. This was the deli guy, actually. And my grandma wanted to get some stuff, and he's like, Hey, Taylor, I figured you'd come in eventually.

And I was like, like yeah nice to meet you thanks for listening man oh you know this is my if you listen to the show you know my uh you know my grandma this is my southern grandma and my grandma was like oh you're one of you know taylor's listeners that's so fun and then like she just got such a kick out of that for like a while she knows about the gumpills i i've been i get recognized in public and i'm like dirt biking in the woods or something with a friend of mine and every time they pump my tires for me they're like your boy's gamer tag i can't believe i'm seeing you meanwhile my friends who know me is like a regular asshole they're like what really like it's uh i had it on a date

one time with this chick who was in the Air Force because San Antonio is a big Air Force club. On a date. That's big. That was really fun. It was on a first date and it was technically one of her Air Force superiors. I was like, oh, hey, kids.

I'm like, ah, that was tangentially kind of cool. That's straight up cool. That's awesome. And then you like prison guards. How would you match that? Nothing cheers you up like a couple prison guards wanting to pal around with you on the yard.

It's a good one. Really publicly. It's a good one. Oh, that guy who's here for 60 days is chopping it up with the prison yo yo what'd you say why he was in here for said he had half an ounce of weed ah ah shit so how he know all the guards listen i'm a youtuber can one of you guys take out your bootleg phone please right um yeah that that would have been the fucking move there were plenty of phones laying

around but but i literally told one of those guards like hey man like it looks bad when we talk like somebody somebody told me hey why how you know the guards i'm like they they know me i don't know them i have to tell them the whole thing did any of the other prisoners actually recognize you none of the prisoners no shit that's kind. That's kind of weird to me. They've been locked down for a while if they're in that low. Or they're old men, mostly, too. I don't know. There weren't a lot of young dudes in there. There was nobody

my age in there, I don't think. I had a thought. Thinking back. So you were saying that Mike Perry has started dropping the N-bomb all the time because he's 23 and me said he was a little black. Yeah, yeah. All right, so you're a little bit Neanderthal.

Neanderthal, yeah. What slurs are you able to drop now? Do you just call people savages, paleos? Flathead. What? Flatheads. You weak-browed, small-lunged bitch. You long-ass fibulas.

Yeah, and your narrow ass rib cages. Mayo monkey. Something like that. It's gotta be one word. My people had art and culture before you raped and pillaged us into non-existence. Along with the other six

tribes of man, which also went extinct. The pygmies. The little folk. The Cro-Magnons. They're still around. They're governor of Florida. He's one of them. I think all the actual pygmies in Africa,

I think they got gone. They don't do well in combat situations. There was like six or seven other human split-offs that were intelligent. Little guys with bows and arrows and shit running around there's a little hobbit people they call them hobbit people then there's like the like is crow magnum one of them i don't know you've lost me when you go to crow magnum i think that's a step behind um uh neander um um us like homo sapien right that's like the guy before us. I don't know. They're all scared.

Hopefully they don't ask about any of this on the trivia later. I'm very excited. I'm excited for the trivia too. You better have your board. I got my board right there, brother. We talked about this briefly, but are you guys also not

pleased about the way they are pussifying dinosaurs? Explain. What do you mean? You don't like the feathers? Oh, actually, actually, it was it was the size of a fucking golden retriever, not a civic. Actually, it didn't have cool ass scales and spines. It had feathers. I don't care for that.

I don't like it. I want Jurassic Park style because that was what sucked me in as a kid. I don't care for that. I don't like it. I want Jurassic Park style because that was what sucked me in as a kid. I was obsessed with dinosaurs. That's one of the things that little boys get obsessed with. And if they were big feathery bird, or not even that big feathery bird things, I wouldn't have been all in the way I

was all in. There's a new special. Have you seen that new special with like six episodes with pretty good CGI? I think it's on Apple maybe. It's one of the premier streaming services made. It's like the Planet Earth kind of thing. Yeah, it's very good cgi i think it's on apple maybe it's it's one of the premier streaming services made it's like the planet earth kind of thing yeah it's very good i'd check it out um and it's like six episodes of different kinds of dinosaurs i like it i don't think they've pussified dinosaurs i like they have what i don't like is weren't as big they've gone back i don't remember them saying they weren't as big i mean there he is right they got a skull

i think for a while that that one scientist's idea that or postulation that they were uh that t-rex was like a scavenger i think that caught on for a while but it seems like they've gone back on that based on more findings you know they find like a t-rex's tooth and an animal that clearly like lived out its life with a tooth and it's like oh how'd that happen a t-rex bit it and it survived the bite and ran away like there's evidence that it was a predator, right? I would hope so. Did you ever see whenever you went to like drive tanks or ox, did you ever see the owner's Triceratops skull?

That's sweet. How big is it? I don't think so. It's in his house. I think I would remember that. He didn't have the house then. So when I went there, they were, well, I was there to help blow up

his old house that was that big modular home there with a pool in the back. We blew up his house and destroyed it. Then they were going to build this pimp house after that. It's a nice fucking house, but he's got in his office, it's a whole ass, fully intact triceratops

skull. It's got like $200,000, right? I think it's probably more it's how big is that more it's big it takes up a good chunk of the room bigger than like a big bison mount oh yeah yeah it's a fucking big piece i'll send you guys i have a picture in front of it because we were drunk a front quarter bison mount is so big that it it impresses upon you the fact that this is not the kind of animal that you would ever tangle with. Yeah. Like, there's no, there's no, your blade, your six inch blade would, there's so much fur just on an animal like that around the throat.

Like, those things are colossal. And the triceratops, so like, if it's just the head, how big is it standing next to it? Is it like all, like just the skulls all the way up to your waist? I think that's on the wall. baby that's fucking cool you see that's that's what i like that's what i like to see with dinosaurs like a big scary beast that didn't have feathers i don't want to say that guy's first name but does does he he seems to have always had people around him who knew cool stuff for him to get into. Like that, like every time I would look, he had he has so many cool toys. I'm sure you've seen all the like he has everything.

We were just over at his place the other day filming the RPG video. We did an RPG. We shot an RPG threat seven through a human torso. And that was fucking wild. That was an expensive video to do because we missed twice. And each one of those rockets is $3,500 a piece.

So the third time you're like, alright, really, Eamon? Where do the warheads come from? Because I saw the Palestinians are making them in-house now. These were Bulgarian surplus rockets. Okay, you can... You should find that video and maybe show it to somebody

because the Palestinians are cranking them out over there in a little shop. They ain't costing $3,500 for them. They're shooting them out of the Russian launchers. After that video, we already filmed it and everything, I got linked up with the guy

who's making them domestically. He actually has a high explosive shit so it's alright might have to revisit at some point I want to see someone else shoot the first one though right what's up I want to see someone else test fire yeah definitely

you just put in the rocket right next to your head essentially I'm sure it'll be fine that's fucking cool they were building the skeet range i think that was the last thing i saw there would be like sporting clays range or something like that but just the wild game that's out there is he's got so much new shit out he's got he's got rhinos now literally like did he get hippos yet he wanted hippos like how does it cost to kill a rhino i don't know if they they've got them for like to to be able to be shot but they're uh

okay what's the fine direction fuck beast and thunder cock are the two rhinos that we named out there oh nice not the real names but that's what we call yeah you shouldn't kill rhinos there's those aren't like there's not a lot of them especially not thunder cock there's some surprising shit you can kill out there like kangaroos i didn't know you could kill those yeah yeah it's like deer and australia my understanding what he told me he like he was i asked him he was like hey what all do you have to shoot and he didn't really know he basically said everything's got a price i was like for about the camel he said eight thousand dollars like eight thousand dollars and he let me shoot that fucking camel and i was i mean i'm feeding the thing carrots and right

what was its name sushi sushi i forgot yeah yeah one thing i don't love about high fence stuff is like some of those hunts some of them are like really like actually pretty good but some of them are literally just like walking up with the 357 and capping this animal that you can feed we can talk about the hangout yes so you know sometimes your friends show you something you're like oh damn i didn't you didn't prepare me i i i wouldn't do that i bet it what he had was uh he had gone to texas to do some hog uh hunting and he's got one of those rigs where you've got like a Mac 11 lower on an AR. Yeah. And, you know, transferable. And I guess they've just got pigs in a pen and they're letting them run.

He says pull and they open the gate and the thing runs right to left like it's Duck Hunt Mario. And he just and I thought that was a little fucked up. So the first video was this nice, clean kill, right? And he goes, yeah. Now, I've shot full auto, but I'm not very experienced, not like you two. And I'm not very good at it. So when he hit the pig, this moving target, I was like, oh, this is nice. And this guy happens to be good with guns. Yeah.

And then the second one. MP5 on the next one i believe oh okay i didn't realize that yeah the pig starts screaming it is in awful pain it is just wailing and like i'm not super tender-hearted on this stuff but man he starts plinking this fucker with a Glock and he's and it's like, dude, just close and finish it. Did I tell you guys about that pig hunt that we did down in Florida? I don't think so. Yeah, we went with knives

and I got a nice clean kill and then Cody goes up for his kill and I'm recording him because I'm using his camera and everything and you just have to really put your knee down on this fucker and just stab him, like, right up under the armpit. Just get him right in the heart. And he had this big fuck, big angry fucker. Apparently they'd known this pig was on the property for a while.

They wanted to kill him. It was just, like, gore and dogs and shit. Like, just a big, big mean fucker that needed to be killed. But the knife was just apparently too short. And so it is about 45 seconds of me just recording cody just going to town stabbing this pig under the armpit and it's just squealing the whole time there's blood spurting out but not like arterial blood so like he wasn't like didn't get the heart yet and it was about after about a minute i was just

started lowering the camera we can't use this dude this is pretty fucked up this is this is mad footage like i bury that pig delete the evidence the pig like in its like shoulder cartilage armor um had buckshot in it from where it actually likes people tried to shoot this fucker with a shotgun and couldn't kill it damn yeah well this pig got finished eventually by the hangout by the yeah and I

don't know if it was dead by the end of the video I have no experience hunting pigs so I was kind of looking to Kyle's face for like affirmation or like what I should think about it because you're correct the first one it was like and he just was a dead pig the second one like I kind of kept glancing up after the glock came out and I saw Kyle's face like like still like there's another 15 seconds of this like this is a lot of yeah i was like is he missing or is it just like that's

no apparently the pig's whales implied to me that he hit it quite a bit yeah i meant like when he walked over with the glock and was firing the glock over and over and it kept squealing i was like is he just missing with the glock this guy's an incredible shot there's no way he's missing it what he's done is he's hit it in the spine with the 9mm, and he's broke its back. So it's just got its front legs trying to crawl away, and he's shooting it up the asshole and in the back legs and stuff, trying to kill it.

But he doesn't have enough penetration with 9mm to go through into the vital organs. With a rifle, you can shoot a deer in the ass and blow his chest out. I've done it. The first actual hunting I ever did when i was very young was with a 20 gauge with my grandpa on his farm and it was rabbit hunting and so we were hunting these hares you know not cute little rabbits you know they were kind of cute you know they were still rabbits but they're like big wild ones and he was that's a great mug seren now. And this rabbit was running across the field and my grandpa didn't even have a gun.

He was taking us out to like show us. And so I like got my little 20 gauge up on my, what, six-year-old shoulder, however old I was, and then like tracked it, shot it. And like, I knew it hit because I heard the like the noise of it hitting and the rabbit making noise. And my grandpa like hit me on the back with his big farmer hand like there you go Taylor good job and so like

then he went over there and I walked with him and I had this idea that like it was almost like a video game where like you just end something like it's just like it's shot it's dead obviously the bullets went in the the shell the the bb's went in and i had shot it on the back hind quarter like kind of above it and it had broken its spine and so it was like crawling with its little front paws and my grandpa like he had done it 10 000 times just like not missing a beat just like walked over and like right in front of me like grabbed it by it's like barely hanging on lower legs and then took the butt of my 20 gauge and just went like whack just like smacked it right in the back of the skull because it was hanging down killed it right away if i recall i try not to recall that but yeah i remember like oh, oh man, this is real. This is like real hunting. I hunted after that a number of times, but he fucked my youngest brother up and like scared him out of hunting entirely because he went out there and like gave my brother a 22 and he was probably six years old also.

And they're just walking around in the woods. And he was like, hey, there's a squirrel up there on that branch. Get him. And he was like, hey, there's a squirrel up there on that branch. Get him. And so my youngest brother shot the squirrel. And apparently one shot killed it. Just dropped down. And I guess my brother didn't fully internalize what it meant to shoot something with a gun.

Because he was inconsolable that he had killed a squirrel. Really? Never wanted to hunt again. again man childhood me was ruthless like i'm much more tender-hearted now than childhood me like how old is your brother he's 27 years younger at the time at the time probably six yeah he did he did this with all of us were around six i think the first times we hunted six or seven When I was four, my dad had been hunting and he had shot a deer and lost it. And so me and dad and our Weimaraner, Sam, went out the next day to go hunting for this thing. The woods were behind our house, like directly behind our house, a couple hundred acres there.

And we tracked the deer and tracked the deer. He shot it with a.243. No, a.22-250. I remember that. And small caliber thing. He'd gotten away. Found the deer and tracked the deer. He shot it with a.243. No, a.22-250. I remember that. Small caliber thing. He'd gotten away. Found the deer finally.

It's down in this dried out creek bed. Dad's got to climb down in there. It's kind of a hard climb to get down in there and not fall. A little three, four-year-old me or whatever stays up there with my slingshot. I'm watching Dad go down there. He goes to grab the deer by the antlers to drag it back out of the creek bed and the deer stands up and comes alive and starts fighting like fight and now dad has the deer by the antlers and they're fighting and he can't let go of the antlers and he's yelling at me to run he doesn't want to let go because he's afraid the deer will trample me if it happens to run my direction because it's like a fucking wild animal and i'm tiny i went

in there on his shoulders i couldn't have walked in there and so i'm not running because i want to i think i can shoot the thing with my slingshot and you know i'm shooting acorns and shit at this thing because i'm a four-year-old child trying to help daddy and uh dad goes get him sam and the wymeriner jumps on this thing and grabs it by the throat and it's stretching skin on this thing a foot and a half off this fucking deer whooping its ass and now dad has a hand free and he pulls his belt off wraps it around like there's a tree out there maybe like this big like three inches he cinches the deer's antler to the tree he doesn't even have a pocket knife we got nothing so we got to go back home for some weaponry. And by the time we got back, Sam had killed the fucking deer.

Good for Sam. Sam's good boy. Sam's metal as fuck. Jesus, Sam. Yeah. Sam was a good boy. What a good pup. The kind of dog you need when you're in dire straits about to be trained.

Mom didn't think so. She took him off. He did have a weapon after all. Sam. Good old Sam. Terrible. Mom took him off. He did have a weapon after all. Sam. Good old Sam. Mom took him to a dirt road? That's not cool. Left him on the dirt road. Me and my sister were in the

back seat looking out the back window at Sam chasing us down the dirt road. Dad looked for him for weeks. Never found him. That's so shitty. What? Fuck. Did Dad marry Skyler? Childhood. on so shitty what fuck childhood mary schuyler that is very shitty what was her motivation for getting rid of the dog i don't remember i think she was trying to

take care of it or something like that maybe maybe she had more responsibility for the dog than she cared to have or something because he was at work or whatever i think that was the deal oh and and to be fair sam was a very good boy i had sicked him on the ups man multiple times i'm sure he was four you know i'm in the yard we are so our yard was um it's sort of this asphalt like loop-de-loop round thing but we had a big sand pit to play in like um in the that was like bricked off like the biggest fucking what do you call it when it's like a sandbox a huge sandbox though and uh i was out there playing ups man showed up and four-year-old me went get him sam because you know why not and he fucked that ups man up he had the big mary k box and uh he was able to fend sam off with that uh

so sam didn't like bloody him or anything but from then on he like wouldn't he i don't i think he wouldn't bring her cosmetic mary k shit because he was so afraid of the dog and be sticking the dog on him so that might have been part of the motivation but again i was four years old and i was a long time that could have been a real different childhood memory yeah you go into juvie at four oh man i don't do shit to me i i here's another story that sounds unbelievable but when also when i was four my dad was friends with the deputy sheriff and um in royston there a guy named i don't say his name anyway they were shooting skeet and i guess i wanted somebody's attention like hey hey hey look at me look at me and they're they're shooting

skeet and grown men are talking so they're just ignoring little four-year-old me. So I went and picked up the biggest rock I could pick up. And I walked over there with it and slammed it on the deputy sheriff's foot and broke it. So if they were going to lock me up, they'd have got me for that one. You were a little hell-taken officer. I also set up an ambush on the highway in front of our house one time,

still four years old, where I took concrete blocks and put them in the highway so the cars would house one time still four years old where i took concrete blocks and put them in the highway so the cars would slow down enough so i could hit them with rocks man you needed a hobby i did i did this is why organized sports are so important for kids so they're not sicking their dogs on what do you play it for t-ball i don't know i don't think so that's like you still shit yourself before right I didn't wear clothes most of the time. You were just out there painting your face? I was naked during all this, yeah.

But nobody would ever believe that a four-year-old actually sicked a dog on a UPS drive. Yeah, they won't believe that shit, no. Ask my mom. I'll give her a ring. Well, fuck it, huh? Is it ad time, Taylor?

It is, and I know, Brandon? Is it ad time, Taylor? It is. And I know, Brandon, do you need to head off? I know you're doing a second show. Yeah, I think I got to bail after this one. But no, I appreciate you guys having me on. It's always a pleasure. Yeah, we love having you. Of course.

Where can everybody go to vote for you? Well, apparently now it's different than usual. Now it's BrandonHerreraForCongress.com is where you can find me. You can see some of the other issues and things we talked about, but yeah, we'll see how it goes. Maybe we'll have to do an update here before too long. All right. I also wanted to extend the invite to all you guys, too. We're doing another big creator range day down

here in Texas in early December. If you guys want to come on down, make the trip, Kyle will have plenty of flamethrowers and air rifles. I don't even know if I'm supposed to be around guns. You can look at them. The government can't get you for that.

I'd better revert. Terrible. He'll be like, I'll think fast. That's 15 years, boy. Also, if any of you guys would like to come down or do the unsubscribed podcast, we'd be more than happy to have you guys. I'm come down or do the unsubscribed podcast we'd be more than happy to have you guys cool thank you i'm definitely down that sounds like fun awesome well uh gentlemen you guys have a good rest of your night good luck with trivia and i will talk to you guys

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It's wintertime, boys. It's cold outside. It is. The grocery store had a Christmas song playing today. That's bullshit. It's the day after. I that stat about how much money mariah carey makes every holiday season from i think it's 12 or 16 million dollars or something every year just from the huge amount it gets played around the holidays it's unsurprising it's on everywhere it's all i want

for christmas is you it's that one right and it's a good song like once but by the time it's like december 1st i'm over it when do you put up the tree uh last year i don't think i even put up a tree because i didn't have anybody over for Christmas at my house this year. Oh, I'm a little cheery. Yeah, I'm a little cheery. I probably won't put it there. You just sit there and read it all in Poe. I just feel sad. Yeah, I probably will put up decorations this year if we use my house for like my family meetup. But if not, I honestly probably won't put up a tree. But the time that's appropriate to do it is any time following thanksgiving whether it's the day after or a week after it just cannot be prior to thanksgiving that's

an appropriate week before thanksgiving that's when she's going up that's too early i didn't really get to get that you know you know some parties would have the tree up right now you know oh no halloween's over. It's Christmas time, baby. You almost had a Christmas tree up on November 1st. Yep. I'll be right back. That's insane. It's not going to happen, though.

I'll do a week before Thanksgiving. That seems okay. I do like the Christmassy season, I suppose. I like that fucking tree. But, you know, I don't want it up that long. I don't want it up that long. I don't want it up that long. So how are we doing this trivia? And in what way are we going to conspire against Woody?

Text each other. I guess that would be the easiest way to conspire. Oh, that would be so shit. Can you imagine making him do 30 minutes of trivia and, like, rig the game so he's gotten zero and that we're excelling through questions way over our heads and he's just like i don't understand dude it would be it would be the 10th lap all over again oh that he would not be pleased if he was like you're texting cheating the whole time and i don't i don't even know how us texting would help to

cheat in this because i guess the way he's doing it is chiz is supposed to hop on and then I don't even know how us would help to cheat in this because I guess the way we're doing it is Chiz is supposed to hop on and then quarterback the answers hard as fuck but not give Woody any answers and then we just sit there and act like it's super easy

of course like we're expanding Christmas tree decorations yeah yeah it is Jackie and I get along well but Of course. Like we're expanding. Are we still talking about Christmas tree decorations? Yeah, yeah. Jackie and I get along well, but Christmas tree decorations are our most heated topic. It drives me batty.

This is my side of it. Of course, you'll get my biased version. But this is it. Sometime in November, maybe now, maybe two weeks from now, she'll start poking away at the Christmas decorations. Now we have a big house. So decorating it is a huge job. So my house is a, it takes three men hours to get all the Christmas decorations down from two

attics. And then in that state, you can't even walk through the fucking house. There are paths in the Game of Thrones room between all these ornaments. How many Christmas trees do you think we have? It's five. We have five Christmas trees in our house.

Why? Time out. Flag. All right. It's too many. Look, there's nothing wrong with having not only five christmas trees but five fantastic rooms to put them in but here's the thing because because you can afford all those things you can also afford a man to come over and put all that shit together while you sit there and it's her passion though right it's her passion he'll help her you sit i i don't want this mess in my home right and her side of it goes something like this like this is christmas i make a magnificent christmas for you people my side is imagine i parked my eight

motorcycles inside the house and left them all the fuck over the place and polished them every day from mid-november to like april when we finally smells like gasoline right and i'm like baby i'm polishing these motorcycles for you yeah quick dry on the floor these motorcycles with exhausts that shine on the inside yeah it's like woody i think maybe you're going over the top here and this isn't really for the family. This is for you. And you'd be right. And she says this year she's going to do it in such a way that she only brings down the decoration she's working on so that it doesn't, like, fill the house with stuff. But she's already working on it.

She's making fish-themed ornaments, corals out. She's molding clay and, like like poking the little polyps and making i could get you something they're in the kitchen right now they're on my kitchen counter because they take over the whole house they're right below me but you don't have to take part you're just mad because of the congestion in the home yes yes but like that's where i eat that's where i eat my meals and now that that there's a seat we even call it dad's seat this is where i typically eat is by this kitchen island and um it hasn't been available for five days and i guess it'll open up again in like february i'm starving don't go crazy

but uh but now i have to balance my food on the armrest of the recliner it's awful i who could live like okay that i i am empathizing so much with how annoying that would be in on november 2nd kids were getting candy two days ago and you're already what five days in to missing pre-halloween christmas decorations is psychotic she's hand making the ornaments and stuff for this year and she does it all the time it i mean in some ways it's like above and beyond super wife right and in other ways it's like this if if you want to be super wife there are other avenues we can pursue yeah you know like this isn't the one that that lights my fire so do you get does she take all of it out of the air i mean you're the one taken out of the attic let's be real and then once it's all out of the attic and taking up your

common space is she doing all the work of setting up the trees and hanging the ornaments or is it like you're conscripted into every bit of this she does 95 of it i shouldn't you know steal valor or anything like that every so often something's tall or sometimes there'll be something to figure out like hey woody i have these leds but i don't have a power supply for them how do we chain all these together and get them going and that'll be tangled lights uh could you could you get that untangled for me from the bad boy oh your house is probably a nightmare to put lights on on the outside everywhere. Oh,

it's a thing. Yeah. And, and like, or there'll be like a, I know we have one thing that plays music in the skaters skate around it. And it's like, this is all for you guys.

Cause no one can hear that from the road. Oh yeah. Yeah. It's inside. Dude, we have Christmas. They're like 15 feet up. Our rooms are really tall.

We have a ladder in the home for months that is 14 feet tall, something like that. It's a really tall ladder and it's heavy. I'm complaining too much. I don't mean to throw her under the bus. Try to convert her to Judaism. Make it simplify things

a little. This is a strong plan. It'd just be a bunch of menorahs then. Whatever holiday you give her, she's going to... Burn the place down with those menorahs. Women love decorating, and so they're going to make the... Did she get really into Halloween decorations? And so as those are coming down, it's only Christmas? No, she did the first year

too, but we literally had zero trick-or-treaters, so now we don't do that. Yeah. So it's really Christmas. She's getting all of her annual decoration. There's Easter shit to be done now. Now that the kids are older, it's less of a thing. There were like baby powder footprints and stuff all over the house back in the day.

I don't know what that means. I guess the Easter bunny had very snowy feet. Like evidence that he had come in the house. Exactly. But they were human feet? Well, she would do it in such a way. It wasn't like human. It was just the balls of her feet and her toes that would make little rabbit prints or something.

I'm going to tell you right now, one of the more terrifying parts of paranormal activity was when they put that baby powder on their floor and they saw that a goat man had been walking through the neighborhood. So you show me that as a kid and i'm terrified that would be scary almost as scary as having your dinner chair taken for what a sixth of the year like like how long is it going to be by the end too much six a year would just be two months no more than that oh because the decorations don't go down on

christmas day they go down like for easter or something like no i i full-throatedly endorse your opinion on this you're not whining at all this is an understandable thing to be frustrated about five christmas trees that just lessens the importance of each one they're not all like there's a primary christmas tree yeah and then some of them are like quick to go up and some of them are just smaller but also have like handmade decorations and shit no real trees that would be the best if she was like i need five live christmas trees we've done real trees but we haven't done them lately yeah wow they smell i don't have a real tree in their house for four months right it's months this has been dead since march can we get

yeah roll forward to the next year it i'm like it's coming no it's already started like i kind of want to get you i want to show you she's made like coral reefs christmas ornaments downstairs in the kitchen damn and you can tell she puts like all this love and care into it i just object to the notion that it's for us like yeah it's for her she's having a fun time and that's fine you need hobbies but when it conquers the whole house and it would take an enormous amount of decorations to conquer your house particularly like the really high traffic important areas like where you eat yeah yeah but that's every day probably yeah yeah it's a daily use chair dude do you remember the uh the brett farve stuff how he took that mississippi uh welfare money uh that was supposed to go to poor children

he uh he was like hey uh the media won't never be able to find out where this money came from or how much you gave me. Right. They're like, no, don't even worry about that, Mr. Favre. It's all in the text message. This is on lock and key, just like your flash. And I think they paid him like a million for some speech. But they definitely there was like five million that went to building his daughter a volleyball gymnasium at her college which is also his alma mater some small school in mississippi i'm sure and uh it's this huge deal now and shannon sharp uh on espn and uh mcafee um what's his name i wrote it down pat mcafee thanks um

uh had been just you know shitting on him you know calling him a thief talking about how he stole from underprivileged people the people who needed the most um um sharp when it made it a racist you know got a got a conservative white man taking it from the people who need it the most and it's like yeah i mean it is it is what happened yeah bad look and so far sued them both uh and like maybe state court or or something like that and uh and wasn't going well for him dropped that one uh then sued him in federal court and the whole time it's just frivolous because he's suing them on the grounds that people took their words to believe that he was an actual thief like like who ran around robbing people and the judge is like like view

on it was no one during these comedic stylings took took their meaning to be that you were an actual thief running about clobbering small children and taking money from their pockets everyone understood that it was referring to the incident in mississippi where the misappropriated funds came it was like they just owned it. So now I think he's still waiting on what they're going to do to him for taking all those poor children's money. Allegedly. Allegedly. Did he win a

Super Bowl ever? Yeah. Pat McAfee was funny. He's good. Brett Favre tweeted him or something. He's like, I'm going to sue you. Who's your attorney? And McAfee is like, joke's on you who's your attorney and mcafee's like jokes on you i don't have an attorney i can't sue someone what if that was the law this fucker refuses to get an attorney i'm hopeless

holding his feet to the fire yeah so brett farm not a not a great guy it would seem now he's gonna throw in that pigskin, though. He was good at that. You can't deny it. I am. It's big in American culture. This weekend's the weekend, right? Missouri-Georgia.

This is the weekend. I told you earlier today, I woke up this morning, and I literally had a bad dream last night that it was halftime, and Mizzou was losing 51-7. I remember the score from my dream and being like oh this is this is going worse than i ever could have imagined kyle's gonna talk so much shit even though we all agree his team's gonna win but yeah mizzou if you guys score it's gonna be a field goal yes i think the george is favored by around 15 and a half points and uh so and you know

missouri's ranked 12th i think yeah yeah georgia might be ranked second in uh georgia georgia um and uh and so i'm sure it'll be a spirited game uh i am worried this is uh this is gonna be this could be a uh This could be rough. Missouri, I always picture these locker rooms. And maybe – I mean, these are kids. They're so young. Man, if I'm that Missouri team, like if the coach would come in there and get me fired up,

like this is the Georgia Bulldogs. They're trying to win a third championship in a row. That can be us. If we take them down, that's our path. If we take that away from them and we head down that path. It's true. They're on the path to the national title. If they win out, they make the playoffs.

Yeah. Oh, for sure. If Mizzou wins out, they'd make the playoffs. We're 7-1 right now. Georgia's 8-0 and the best team in the country. And so it's... Mizzou is going to be so fucking amped up for the 8-0 and the best team in the country. And so it's, it could really, it could, Mizzou is going to be so fucking amped up for the game because exactly what Kyle said, like playing Georgia is a big deal.

I'm hoping that Georgia doesn't take it seriously as enough as they should, but I'm also worried that Georgia's coach, who's a great coach, is going to be like, hey, remember last year when these guys almost humiliated you, when they almost ruined our season? Don't let that happen again.

Now they're better. They weren't ranked 12th last year. Is that right, 12th? Does that sound right? Yeah. This is their best year in a decade. It is. Don't take it lightly. We're better than we were last year by a lot,

and Georgia's slightly worse than they were last year. And so it could happen. But Georgia's also just really fucking good. Our ugly quarterback can fucking sling it, though. So I think we're going to bring this shit home. It'll be a high-scoring game because Mizzou hangs their hat on. They have really good offense. I think the total combines is supposed to be like 55 maybe.

I don't know. I was doing the betting odds earlier. You want the over, Taylor? I hope so. If it's high scoring, I think that helps Mizzou because our defense isn't as good as Georgia's. Every so often I see a sports bet that I think is a lock. Like, oh, i should bet money

on this that'd be helpful like five digits and i never make the bet and more often than not that's a good thing because my locks aren't that locked in man let's start a a gambling show none of us have any experience we don't gamble we're like once again we are we're all agreed the favorites are gonna win like we just don't know shit well georgia has a two next to its name that denotes a better team than the 12th all my weight full-throated endorsement georgia bulldogs it would be fun to track our bets i don't want to make them because money's you know useful but i would love to like imaginarily make bets i mean it's kind of like you know you do fantasy betting that seems a little lame but that doesn't seem that is that's really embarrassing well here's what we do though you

know each of us would like it we each get like an imaginary thousand dollars. And, uh, you know, we, we, we decide that, you know, these eight sports count and we, we place the bet and,

you know, solidify it in the WhatsApp or whatever, and keep a spreadsheet going and see who can make the most money and say a month. That'd be interesting. Keep up with it. Dude, I'd lose so bad.

I know a lot about hockey. And when we used to do those brackets, Kyle would do consistently better than me just by picking the opposite of whoever i did because i would get in my own head and be like calling too many underdogs like well yeah the penguins are seated lower but they still got malkin and crosby and they're healthy as can be they're gonna and then kyle would just be like what'd you pick pittsburgh okay i'm taking washington then it's like oh they win the cup like I think that literally happened in 18

like that because you just picked the opposite of me but yeah I'm so looking forward to the Mizzou Georgia game this Saturday I'm going to watch it and then if they oh that would be huge if I didn't keep it close it's 230

so 330 your time. Okay. Okay. Well, it should be a rowdy fucking stadium, and I hope it's sunny. I hope it's a good game. It'll be fun. And I hope we fucking win,

because it would suck to lose one at home to an SEC opponent. It would, but that would be sweet to beat Georgia at home. That never happens. Can you win out? After Georgia, do you have any other really tough ones? I think Florida and one other ranked team. Mizzou has a pretty tough schedule. I'll look at some teams and I'll be like,

there's a guy in the Hangout being like, Michigan's so great. And it's like, they do seem great from what I can tell. But then it's like, I looked at Michigan, who they've played, and it's like, they haven't played anybody. Their first two games in particular, I was like, who's Robert Patterson? Was that a whole team or just one dude?

Oh, yeah. Yeah. So after Georgia, Mizzou has Tennessee, Florida florida and arkansas so still some tennessee's no easy games there no easy games even arkansas i don't even know how good they are this year but they're a real team they're not like whoever michigan beat yeah michigan what is and then we're gonna have some michigan fans in the comments like you don't get it and it's like wait no like oh you thought i thought i got it yeah like michigan don't get it. And it's like, wait, no. You thought I thought I got it? Yeah, like Michigan, they've beaten East Carolina.

They can be good sometimes. Bowling Green, Rutgers, Nebraska, Minnesota, Indiana, Michigan State. Their only ranked opponent is Penn State. Oh, and Ohio at the end of the year. So, okay, I guess Ohio State's a very good team. But Purdue, they're not good. Maryland, no. SEC teams, we've got to deal with these harder schedules.

First year following college football closely at all, and I've already just immediately pulled it into the SEC propaganda machine. Like, yeah, we're better because we are, because our teams are better. Not even close. Well, we're going to find out. I mean, it's not like Ohio State and Michigan and the other – It's not like Clemson hasn't been winning. FSU is fourth, right?

Fourth, fifth, sixth, somewhere in there. They are. Yeah. No, they're good. Okay, fine. We'll see. I don't mind losing because we're either the best team or we're not is kind of the way I look at it, and that really simplifies games for me.

It's like we lost. Oh, sorry. As a non-SEC guy, the SEC fans are very frustrating because they're like, we are the best teams. And if we lose, well, that just means we lost to the best. And if we win, we won the best. And all the other games don't count. You know, when you play at a conference, you do lose sometimes.

Not that I recall. Nope. And we won't stop. I know. I know. Clemson's won like half of the last four championships. This is pre-Georgia. And it didn't matter to anyone.

Still, SEC. Much better better just because they get like so much more viewership than the other conferences so like there's more fans and so it like everything's augmented from like a narrative standpoint like who's espn going to talk about like mostly the top ranked acc people and then the sec as a whole. They talk about LSU a shit ton, and they've had two losses this year. They're still really good, though. Yeah, LSU to me is like one of those legacy programs now. They are.

Those fucking bastards. We could be undefeated if it wasn't for them. How are we doing the trivia? I don't know. I've got my little writing board here and my marker and my towel. Is it Kyle? Jizz. Oh, Jizz. Okay. Is he on? He's supposed to hop on at three

hours, I believe. Oh, okay. Alright, well, cool then. My phone's in the other room. Someone text him just to make sure he's all up and ready. He said he was. We were texting earlier today if you saw in our group. So we should be good i hope that he throws like some something ridiculous like draw a map of like like something really frustrating

and difficult or a huge list of retail stores again that would be good that would be great if you just ask the same question the top 10 retail stores stores. That was so funny because Woody was like, I think I got some, but I definitely didn't get all of them. Then Woody holds up his board. It's like eight of the top 10. And Kyle's is like Walmart, Amazon. Target. Target.

And that's it. You couldn't think of stores. I genuinely didn't want to. I knew he was going to beat me, and I didn't want to try at all. I hated that for some reason. i hated the busy work of it um but i i hated the nature of the question it was such a like i don't know just think of the like the biggest stores real quick it's not like i know anything about their earnings report anyway i was like write 10 words what is this slavery it's i've never seen that on any quiz anyway anyway not again i'm

shitting on taylor again and i like i said last week i don't care it's not fair because he had very limited time to come up with it you know so so hate was you know directed towards his um for for me to him into him into his eyes hatefulness this is what i was feeling uh we played code names uh tuesday night um as we often do often do in the hangout a lot of fun yeah in the in our 50s didn't they yeah man yeah i wore the blue shirt this time i lost my shit i lost my fucking shit and started screaming at those people um i felt bad that i screamed at the black guy because he was new it was his first time ever in there and after i had screamed at him and i i kept calling the new guy i was like

and then the new guy comes in and fucks things up out of nowhere and i you turned out to be like you just got here and you fucked shit up like you don't you don't you haven't you haven't cut your teeth in this server yet and you're still already ruining fucking games and then i noticed he was dressed up as a klansman and i was like immediately apologized i was like dude i didn't see your costume before man i'm so sorry i snapped at you earlier over the game not i didn't know you were a brother i didn't know you're cool like that yeah and then i was cool no reason to yell but what's happening it feels like to me it's like playing chess and really concentrating on it. Not that I play chess, but

imagine that I could. Trying hard, as hard as I can. And so are you, my opponent. And then one of the spectators flips our fucking board over and apologizes and we let it go because he slipped. But it's the fourth time they flipped our chess board over.

Hey guys, Hey, hey. You know what? There's a potential problem afoot here. Everyone needs to be a little more careful about clicking it and ruin this game. You all have the power to click. Use it judiciously. And then they don't, and that's when Kyle goes bonkers. Yeah, they did it like six times in a row, like ruining the game.

And it's like, if you want to piss me off, it's mission accomplished. The one guy was, in hindsight, it's like if you want to piss me off your mission accomplished the one guy was in hindsight it's really funny because he he clicked and like ruined something and guess that we're all like don't click this was after a don't click speech we get this whole like guys do not mess this up if you don't let's come to a consensus let's talk things through and then he fucking doesn't but that was like a mistake now he's so nervous that he's gonna click the wrong thing he clicks and guessing and i think it was taylor who was like couldn't you just not click things yeah he clicked and guessing and ended the

whole team's turn because he would was worried'd misclick, so he misclicked. It had been an hour, and we had played one game. And it was like, I couldn't take it anymore. I started screaming, and you guys were like, it's okay.

And I'm like, it's not okay. Actions have fucking consequences. At what point do we enforce any kind of rule? I will not stand for anarchy. I won't. I was having a meltdown i was having an awkward thing because i thought kyle was maybe going a little bit hard on this guy oh yeah but i also wanted to be like supportive and on kyle's side yeah when i just you felt like

united states and i'm israel yeah they nailed it yeah i was going hard in the paint on them just fucking bombing the shit out of each and every one dude i felt like i was in like an hour of damage control mode there because like you t off and i'd have to be like he's a new guy he's a good guy people are talking about him he's a great guy mostly sometimes he misclicks who hasn't misclicked like that's it was oh but like everybody you should berate at least one person. They're all big boys. I didn't yell at any children or anything. I'm not getting my money unless Kyle berates

somebody. Look, I berate when it's... People need to be yelled at every now and then and held to account. If you can't sit there and not click this button, it's like man, I'm... I remember after your third diatribe of like we don't what do we not do click like that's like and then immediately someone just you know hi ho silvered an answer and you were like at like like having an aneurysm, like losing it over there. I saw in your eyes

just fury. There's a weird thing in the Patreon. Some people have been there for years and have a kind of seniority, right? Like Scum, I call it scumming it. He just clicks whenever the heck he wants to. But listen, Scum's been in there

for five years, I don't know, more? Like 10 years. Scum doesn't pay. He's just five years. I don't know. More? Like 10 years. Scum doesn't pay. He's just my friend. Okay. Yeah. I didn't know that. So when Scum does his own thing, it's like, well, you know, Scum's host to Jason at this point.

I mean, he might be. But, you know. Yeah. He was in the circle before paying existed. You know what I mean? Scum's a good guy. And he's usually right when he scums it up. I agree to disagree. No, it is legit hard to win with him when your team sometimes like it was i think it was he won

he's been doing well the last two times but i have had it where it was like it's hard like he keeps clicking on whites i i'll tell you what i want we're about to fire up the trivia by the way um but if if you i i love code names um as far as board games go or like word games whatever you want to call it whatever category it is that it it's the king of king uh king of bows for me um you guys ever want to do what i was suggesting and make a little bracket of two-person teams three-person teams four-person teams i will pit me and a team that has chis on it against anyone anywhere any fucking time i'm down that sounds like fun we can we can we could i would

play for money i would play for funsies i would play for silly like bets but when she and i would game historically we didn't fuck you up me and woody yeah we just dude you won't even know we're texting like yeah taylor and i are so much better than you and she's think you are and that's not even as good that's you and she's think you're great you're actually just mediocre and we're better than you think you are yep their arrogance will be their downfall Unlike mine We're the actual best We can absolutely set up a bracket In the 50 patron or whatever And I know that Vavity and Scum

And those guys would love to compete And we found a really good Like a way to play the game I don't know what to call it Like that URL based version of the game is excellent Oh, the one we always play i haven't played a different one oh yeah there's an awful one there's a you can play in a tabletop simulator which is i don't know if you're familiar with that but it's oh i have played that yeah it's real bad uh well it does everything tablet tabletop

simulator it is what the name might suggest there are dozens and dozens hundreds of games probably on there so I'm following this link that just gave us to join the buzzer because we're going to have a buzzer I guess okay so there's a buzzer this time okay

yeah I'll keep it over here or something So there's a buzzer this time. Okay. Yeah. I'll keep it over here or something. Make a little window. Get Taylor in there so we can have a buzzer as well. I'm in here. Are you on the buzzer thing though? Yeah. I have the buzz in dot well. I'm in here. Are you on the buzzer thing, though? Yeah, I have the buzzin.live.

It says locked right now. Zach says we're off-set. Yeah, I see it, too. Oh. Are we not using our... What is this? Know it, show it questions. All right, can you hear me? Yes.

Yes. All right, I apologize for the audio. Things will be better next time we do this. I'm using AirPods. Yes, there's a buzzer system. I can see who buzzes in and who will be first. So we'll see how this goes for now. There will be a whiteboard section, as you can see right there.

This is cobbled together in the last couple hours. Everything broke. So normally there would be categories named and whatnot. So for now, it's just lots of trivia. There will be, it says it right there. There's a know it, show it section, which is proper trivia. Then I heard some things from last week. Taylor also heard some grievances being aired.

That pinkish purplish section there for the feminine people, I need multiple choice. That's right there. So we've got that whiteboard section. He's talking about you, Kyle. A tough final question, I think. So we'll just do one point for everything. There will be bonus points.

And since there is a buzzer, it's first come, first serve. And you can steal on the multiple choice and you can steal if somebody fails. There will not be negative points. Unless you have a bad attitude, right? Well, yeah. I am the king of games after all, as Kyle said.

Nobody's better at pretty much any game but myself. Video games, board games, card games, all of them. You've never beaten me in anything ever. Excellent point, Kamesh. I have a fun thing. So just stay with me for, i don't even know how long was it a year something like that and uh he would come over and play board games often with my wife and kids he hated to lose but he lost very competitive plenty yeah yeah so they like he's Risk, risk is my game. I'm all about risk. This is my game. And then like, I don't know, my 80 million

year old mother-in-law who was dying of cancer would whoop up on Chiz. He was clearly letting her win. We never played Risk. Oh, you've left Indochina undefended. Gin rummy is what they beat my ass at. Your army's

all weak. Your army's as feeble as I am. Woody's the best poker player of all of us here. Kyle will attest. We've played poker with Woody many times. He's pretty undefeated. It's true. Well, yeah, he just goes all in every time, but he doesn't...

He wants to go in for all the money that we... He lives his poker balance like a throwaway account. He wants to get the game over, and I'm like, yeah, he just goes all in every time, but he doesn't... He wants to go in for all the money that we... He lives his poker balance like a throwaway account. He wants to get the game over, and I'm like, okay, well, then I'll rebuy. He's like, wait, no, don't do that. And it's like, yeah, we'll just keep doubling the money if you want to do it. Doesn't matter. We're here to play trivia. We're not talking about how poker games

can be ruined. Ruined? I don't know. I walked away with money. Sounds like Woody's the better poker player. He got the $5 from the game over instantly. Thinking of a number between 1 and 20. 5.

10. 11. It was 7. Kyle's closest. Kyle, you will have pick of the board. I just pick a number, I suppose? Yeah, but specify which one. Kyle's closest. Kyle, you will have pick of the board. I just pick a number, I suppose? Yeah, but specify which one. Oh, the one... No, it's...

The parenthetical one. Oh, so these are the multiple choice ones. And remember, I will unlock the buzzer. You want to buzz in. Okay. What is the square root of 196? Is there a punishment for being wrong?

No, there is not. Okay, then buzz. Woody was first to buzz in. Woody? 14. And we will see. That is the correct answer. Woody's on the board. Fuck we will see. That is the correct answer. Woody's on the board. Fuck.

All right. That one was surprising. I was like, am I allowed to stop and do math on my whiteboard? Like, I don't know how this works. And it was six. So I thought it'd be a four. It was like, ah, that 24 is too big. I wouldn't have made that connection, I don't think.

The board is yours. I was going to guess 14. Oh, my board. All right. I wouldn't have made that connection, I don't think. The board is yours. Oh, my board. All right. I'll take a non-parenthetical two. Okay. What is officially the newest country to have been founded back in 2011? The newest country to have been founded back in 2011. What are the...

Nobody has buzzed in yet. Oh, Woody has buzzed in yet oh woody has buzzed in woody kyle tricked me um i i thought that you would i don't know we need an answer here it wasn't a dream i just thought i thought you were trying to quickly write it down and i was like oh you don't need just buzz in and say it don't let taylor steal this from you i understand what you're saying what What are new countries? I have no idea. I'm thinking Africa. They're always moving new stuff.

Taylor, you're in the right area. Oh, Africa is the right area? I'll give a pretty big hint here. Kyle mentioned it earlier today. Half mentioned it. Ding. But I'm positive. Oh, well then say your thing. Sudan?

That's only half correct. I'm sorry. I will finish the answer. Taylor, want to give it a shot? It is South Sudan. And Taylor is on the board with South Sudan. Kind of a layup at that point. Really hollow victory.

You didn't guess the right cardinal direction. So, I mean, you know, it had 25%. It tastes like lemons, you cocksucker. I didn't like how that went down at all. The fact that Sudan wasn't good enough for the world. No, Sudan is its own country. It's not good enough. Oakley, I hope the sfr comes and finds you

wherever you are with your airpods does a little torture on you dude you just gotta learn jesus salt has already begun uh taylor the board is yours all right so we've done parenthetical one and non-parenthetical two let's do uh top left non-parenthetical one open a window and look inside to tell me who is this billionaire co-founder of a... Buzzed. ...billion-based Kyle. Washington, D.C. is the only commonly famous... Oh, come on.

What now? Commonly forgotten about as his childhood best friend. He can lock in the buzz if you don't... Oh. He's going to need an answer. It's not Steve Wozniak? Ooh, no, that is a common wrong answer. Oh, okay. Darn.

Anyone else? I feel like Woody should really know this one. This billionaire co-founder of a Washington-based technology company commonly... Woody has buzzed in. You said Wozniak? That is incorrect. That is a wrong answer. I'm going to go with Steve Jobs then.

I don't know. That is incorrect. Did you just catch it? No, not confidently. Let's see where this goes. Woody, pass it over here. I'll try your answer. Open a window was a hint, and it is in Washington.

The answer is in Washington. The answer is Paul Allen. Yes, always forgotten. Isn't that guy from American Psycho? Let's have a look at Paul Allen's car. That's the character from that, yes. So tasteful. All right, so do you pick one now, or do I do it again because we all missed? I believe, Taylor, the board is still yours.

All right, well, I'll do parenthetical two. Ooh, we're really getting on the side of the balance here. With over a dozen films and bringing in over $10 billion, what is the most successful single-character film franchise? Kyle has buzzed in. Let's go with James Bond. That is incorrect. What are you next?

Spider-Man. The next. Spider-Man. The answer is Spider-Man. I knew if he missed it, I had a good shot. Should have known that. That's easier than I thought. Should have thought harder. Make a billion each. Oh, I'll go non-parent.

Have we done one and two without the parentheses? Done one and two. Correct. I'll do three.parenthetic. Have we done one and two without the parentheses? Done one and two, yeah. I'll do three. Let's keep it in order, I guess. Are you glad I just ran Leifix 7 or something to lead off? Which planet in our solar system is the only one not named after a group? All right, Taylor has buzzed in. That would be Earth.

That is correct. Earth is the only one yes he is not named gaia there we go baby taylor uh let's keep going down the line four in the twilight zone episode to serve man humans receive a coded alien tay has buzzed in. Wow. It's a cookbook. It's a cookbook. It is indeed a cookbook. Yes. How much slower was I? Can you tell? No. You were pretty damn close though. You both popped up. I knew you'd know

that one too. That's a good episode. That's such a great show. Let's keep rolling down the line. Let's do five. Taylor, not a fan of the multiple choice. What is the historical name of Istanbul? Taylor. Constantinople. Fuck. That is correct. Just barely edging out Woody. Remember that song? Yes. They might be giants. Yeah. Next one. Five.

We just did five. Oh, six. In Monopoly, Boardwalk is the same color group as what? Woody. Boardwalk. All right, I've already found an improvement for this next time. Park Place? It is, in fact, Park Place.

Thank you for knowing the Monopoly board so well. Damn it. Woody, the board is yours. Oh, seven? All right. Which NBA team set the record for the longest playoff drought in the history of basketball? Woody.

Washington Wizards? That is incorrect. I'm sorry. Kyle. The Hawks? That is also incorrect. I'm sorry. Kyle? The Hawks? That is also incorrect. Sorry. Taylor? It's got to be an older team.

Taylor, guess the Kings. I'm going to go... I'm going to go... Brooklyn Nets. That is also incorrect. It is the Sacramento Kings. Woody was trying to help you out there. He was trying to goof on me.

Damn, I should have taken that to the bank. I'll trust you next time. Woody, the board is still yours. Eight. What does PEMDAS stand for? No quick buzzers on this one. Woody, you have buzzed in. Parentheses,

exponent, multiplication, division, addition, subtraction. Wow, that sounds really good. Is it the answer though? It is in fact that. Thank you for remembering your order of operations. You know what's funny? When that came up, I'm like, please, one of us.

You should have known that. I didn't remember which one was exponents. Oh my goodness. It's so much longer ago for Woody, though, when he got it. Math is for the birds. I'm not sure. Which one of us finished the last... When did you graduate your

school? College, 13. So 10 years ago. I think I was earlier than that. I forgot what I finished my master's. It wasn't that long ago. Who's Colin?

Anyway, I'm sorry. Carry on. I believe it's still your board. Are we up to nine now? We are. Okay, nine. This tasty mascot said, I enjoy rocking my sick mustache, but I hate not having a mouth.

It's a shame because I really wouldn't be able... Kyle? I don't know. I know the product, but I don't know. I know the product, but I don't know what it's fucking. Okay, well, that's what I'm looking for. I'm not looking for the mascot name. That is correct, Kyle. It is Pringles.

I don't know if he has a name. I'm sure he does. Now, that's a real question. None of that math stuff. I knew this was Pringles. I can't believe it. Taylor did say he was a fan of snack-based trivia, a category I've not seen in a lot of game shows.

Let's just continue in the same category over here. And it is... Who was the billionaire ousted as a racist owner of an NBA franchise? Sterling? We'll take it franchise? Woody. Sterling? We'll take it.

It is Donald Sterling. Yes. And bonus points. We'll give you an extra bonus point if you can name the team he owned. Is this just for Woody or can we guess teams? I'm really not sure. Was it the Clippers? It was, in fact, the Clippers. Give Woody a bonus point. Kyle, we're going to have to the Clippers. Give Woody a bonus point.

Kyle, we're going to have to aggregate our points. I don't have any. Oh, you don't have any? I got like two, maybe one. He does only have like one or two. What are the scores, Zach? Can you put it in the... It's one. Kyle's at one. Oh, we've got it on us.

Do you see it? Yeah, over here on the column. You have six. I on us. Yeah, yeah. Okay, I see now. Do you see it? Oh, yeah. Over here on the column. Okay. You have six. I have four. Kyle has one. I still don't see it. Well, that's because we haven't been in his, you know,

forte of the multiple choice, really. I'm also a slow reader, apparently. Taylor was like, You buzzed fast. And I was like, God damn it. I should have gotten high for this. I should have been sober.

I need coffee. I'm completely missing it. Where do you see the scores? And I was like, God damn it. I should have gotten high for this. I should have sober. I need coffee. I'm completely missing it. Where do you see the scores? Oh, I see. Under my name. Very small. I see. Yeah. All right. Woody's board's yours. We're on 11 if you want to progress next. 11, please.

Which talk show host allowed Bill Clinton to show what a cool cat and kid he was on the Woody? Or City Hall. That is correct. I wish that it showed how much slower I was. It really is. I see it pop up. It's real close.

I thought I got it. It was that... Woody, putting on an absolute clinic hair. It's all about the buzzing technique. All right. So you want to, would you like 12 Woody?

Please. Yeah. Here's Johnny. This underwater array of volcanoes surrounding the Pacific ocean. Kyle has buzzed in first. God, ring of fire. That is correct.

Johnny cash hint for you. The board is yours. Move us to parent is yours Keep going and know it show it Which country Let me reset Which country has 9% of their total government revenue Coming from domain royalties Kyle Domain royalties

9% Maybe if I repeat bits of the question, it'll come to me. That is incorrect. What are your next? Oh, shit. I thought he was going to choose Saudi Arabia. I will then. Odd choice? No, that is also incorrect.

I don't know. Both of our answers were terrible. Mine was even worse than his, though. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. That's such a stupid thing that I said. Just to clarify, this is the domain.co.uk things like that. Oh, shit.

Well, I can't change my answer. I'll let everyone go again. I'll clear the buzzers if you want to buzz in again, go for it. From domain royalties. All right. What country loves the internet i got it brazil that is incorrect oh come on is it sea land i can't remember the name of it no he had the license to have the amazon for the website you know yeah jeff bezos is losing his ass off the coast of UK and the whole country is really just like an oil rig Or something is that

That's Sealand that's for sure the name you're thinking of But that is not the correct answer Taylor last shot Lichtenstein I'm just going to click this button right here It is Tuvalu With a.tv extension. It's not a country.

I thought the same thing. Tuvalu. I like the question, though. Continue in the category. I thought it was mine, but it might not be. I also lost track, so I'm just going to click 14. This breakfast cereal, created in

1878, was established in Mark Taylor. Kellogg's, not Frosted Flakes, just the Kellogg fucking wheat cereal. Kellogg Flakes. I cannot take that answer, Taylor. Kyle? Kyle's next. Was it Corn Flakes? It is, in fact, Corn Flakes. It is in fact Corn Flakes

Frosted Flakes would bring you too much joy Taylor They didn't put sugar on that shit Jokes on them I can still masturbate And eat Corn Flakes That's going to keep me up tonight Now with all those yogurt enemas that Kellogg would have been pumping into you 15 let's go

In the original Pokemon movie When Ash is turned to stone and killed taylor has buzzed everyone buzzed in quickly taylor go you could choose tears i swear to god i was gonna say tears would tears have passed it was you could choose tears and then the tears of all the other pokemon okay my answer was tears that's what i was i swear to god i didn't know the answer. I was going to say a back rub. Rub his face. Oh, that would have felt so good. See, more of these, less of the math.

I would have beaten Missouri if I could have gotten the Pokemon question right. That would have killed me if I lost Pokemon. It was a guess. It just kind of makes sense. Here we go. Everyone was listening so fast, I was shocked. Run us through to 16 arches and whorls are alright well Kyle buzzed in this feels

sus excuse me you didn't even read it very quick footprints no fingerprints blood splatters okay Woody that is also incorrect Taylor I thought I was gonna be right

so Kyle said fingerprints Woody said said no kyle said kyle said footprints oh then i say fingerprints because a whirl is fingerprint that is the correct answer sorry yes all right all right take us up to the whatever the next parenthesis one. I believe we're at three. Yes. All right. According to the New York. All right, Kyle. You guys are quick. Monday.

And the answer is Monday. According to the New York Times, which one is easiest to solve? Let's continue down through that path. All right. I think we're abusing the system here. What celestial body is roughly 239,000 miles from Earth, Kyle? The moon. That is correct.

That was an easy one. All right. You can't buzz in already. All right. I'm going to clear that. How do you get your guess? Kyle's doing it. You guys aren't even reading the questions. But I instantly answered it.

If you buzz in, I'm going to give you two seconds to answer. I hope your reading comprehension is good. Two seconds? Twenty is what's... Save the cheerleader. Save the world. This TV show is woody. Heroes. The answer is Heroes. Ruin that show.

I've never seen that show. I liked it. It was good at first, actually. It was good at first. It's upsetting. Pantieri. So hot. She was pretty. She did acne commercials also.

Fuck yeah. Proactive. Proactive. You're right. This NBA team kept telling folks to Woody. Oh, this is for me. It's A. That is correct. These 76ers, they trusted in the process.

They failed on the process. I would have guessed that also just knowing that's your team. I was expecting you to guess the Supersonics. Anyway, number seven. Kyle? 84. That is incorrect. Taylor, what year did the U.S. Olympic hockey team take the gold?

I think it was 88. That is also incorrect. It wasn't 80. 1980. No, they didn't win the gold that year. Yes wasn't 1980. 1980. No, they didn't win the gold that year. Yes, they did. Feel free to Google it. I thought the whole

Miracle on Ice thing was like they didn't. They won the lead-up game against Russia and then didn't get the gold. Fuck. They won the Russian. They beat the Russians and that was the lead-up. And then I think Swindlin or Fitzwilliam. Swindlin. They. Swindlin. They were Swindlin.

Fuck, that was supposed to be my layup. And I was like, it's not 80. They gave me the sixers and they gave you the miracle on ice. And I just fumbled it like a tard. Damn it. All right. I think I'm on eight. Kyle.

Monica. That is incorrect. Which is the smallest independent country on the Iberian Peninsula? Oh, Iberian. Woody. Gibraltar? That is also incorrect. Andorra.

That is correct by process of elimination. Taylor has gotten there. I knew it wasn't Portugal and Spain. Not always who's fastest, I guess. Just who's last. You know what? There's a lot of ways to play the goddamn right through. The slow rat gets

the cheese. Alright, Kyle. One. I mean, XBMs? That is incorrect. Woody. That is also incorrect. Taylorlor what unit of data storage was used on the original xbox console blocks taylor again picking up the slot wait that's a unit of storage oh yeah you don't remember that it was just in blocks it was ridiculous

it's so silly could be different kinds of bites it's not even i know it meant nothing i'm like i'm like this is a made-up question damn it we could be tied if i got 1980 right on the fucking question all right next one up wait do you have nine did we do i see i'd have nine yeah wow wow yeah yeah Just did that one. All right, ten. Here we go. Kyle? What beverage was advertised as the drink? Tang.

Two. That is correct. There's your layup. All right. We are done with the buzzing now, boys. Bring out those whiteboards. Yes. I'm looking forward to the whiteboard one.

At the point of the game, we find ourselves in a precarious situation. It appears the competition has excelled and we have faltered. Woody leading the pack with 10 magical PKA points. Taylor just behind with eight of his own and I myself once

again faltering far behind six points. That's over. Bonus points for handwriting in this round. It's anyone's match because the whiteboard sections, these are worth ten apiece. That's hilarious. This has all been moot.

That would be hilarious. All right. Kyle is in last. Go ahead and throw a dart at one of these. That's so stupid. One. I'm sorry. I of these that's so stupid one I'm sorry I apologize I'm an asshole I'm sorry one alright I need all of you out of the 10 highest grossing movies of all time only two

are original properties that are not a part of any expanded universes or franchises what are they I need to write big of all time only two what are they? I need to write big. The 10 highest grossing movies of all time. Only two.

Please do not reveal and help one another. They're not a part of any expanded universes or franchises. Okay. 10 highest grossing movies of all time. Original properties. All right. There were three until the sequel came out.

Yes, of course. Avatar. Yes, indubitably. Well, let me. Da-da. I think I got one. Do you have one of them, Kyle? Is that what you are?

I know I have one, and I'm not sure if the second one is right. The second is a toughie. I'm confident in my one and my second. I don't have it. A point for each of these. And a bonus point if you get both, because I really don't think anyone's going to get the second. It's a toughie.

I didn't even know this. All right. Alright. Taylor, just name some movies. Are we ready to flip boards? Alright. I want you all to flip over. Let's see what we got. And there we go.

Look at that. Taylor and I both have Titanic and Grand Theft Auto. Titanic and Wizard of Oz. All right. Let's go back to the board and see what the answers are. I hope we got it right. It's the Lion King from 2019, actually.

And the Titanic. Good guess with Down with the Wind. I think we all know that one is adjusted for inflation would be the case. Yeah. Maybe I assumed that would be the case. Oh, maybe I assumed that would be the case. Keep going down the board, progressing.

What are the four original possible starter Pokemon in the original game Red, Blue, Yellow, plus your rival's unique Pokemon? This will separate the cream from the crop, the wheat from the chaff, the tailors from everyone else. This is bullshit.

It should all be 76ers questions. Who got traded? What was Gary's special Pokemon? Well, you've already... Well, I won't give it away, but what is your rival's unique Pokemon? Because there are four potential starters across those three games. Your rival has a unique one in one of those games.

I can only even think of three fucking Pikachu that are the beginning ones. Or three fucking Pokemon that are the beginning ones. Or three fucking Pokemon that are the beginning ones. Oh, yeah. Okay. I know what you're angling for. I've got my answer. Alright, I'm down. I'm most looking forward to Woody's answer.

Yeah. Woody's is going to be like, Rock Boy. Rockmon it's not a bad guess okay I'm ready I guess everybody ready? let's see what you got

I said Squirtle, Charmander, Pikachu and Vine you're thinking the right way alright Taylor Bulbasaur is what I was trying to imagine and then Gary's special Pokemon is Vine. You're thinking the right way. Yeah. Alright, Taylor. Bulbasaur is what I was trying to imagine. And then Gary's special Pokemon is Eevee, and it will evolve depending on the type you pick.

I have Pikachu, Balzabar, and I ran short. Repetar, Fuckazal, and Eliphi, I know, because I didn't quite understand the question on the bonus page. I didn't quite understand the question. I'm actually going to give Woody two for that.

Bulbasaur is pretty close. Bulbasaur is close enough. Elefaino is very funny. Kyle got three and Taylor, you got all four. I guess I worded the question poorly. I'll show the answer.

Bulbasaur, Charmander, Squirtle, and Pikachu. And then I wanted also your rival unique Pokemon. I erased Pikachu because I was like, oh, he's doing Pokemon Yellow for the rival one. That's what it is. Correct. And technically your rival. Anyone want to take a guess at his name for a bonus point? No.

Yes. Go for it, Taylor. Gary. name for a bonus point? No. Yes. Go for it, Taylor. That is incorrect. That is in the anime. His name is Blue. Okay. It's a little too late. I said it. You're already so far ahead. I don't need a pity point. You didn't need the point.

I got four on that. You will. Erase the boards, boys. This is going to be a good one. Fix these famous movie quotes to what they should be. You just need to replace the part that's fucked up. Oh, no. One point for each of the corrections. And a bonus point if you name the movies, too, that these quotes are from.

The first incorrect quote is, Pac-Man ain't got shit on me from 2001 this film the next one is it wasn't the airplanes it was gravity that killed the beast from 1933 i could have had class i could have been a champion i could have been somebody from 1954 i'm not bad i'm just born that way from 1988 and I'm your boysenberry from 1993. Coming on Smooth Jazz on A-Rod 95.8. Man, I

this is tough. Alright, I don't think I've seen any of these movies. Do I have to do the entire quarter? No, just the part just to fix the part that's fucked. I don't want you writing an essay. And again, one point for the correction,

one point if you name the film. For a possible of ten points, somebody could really pull ahead here. Mass up this movie section. One point for fix these famous movie clips to what they should be oh I see

I'm not bad I'm just born that way I'm rather struggling Pac-Man ain't got shit on me what Pac-Man that was the easy one well I got E or at least I didn't know i don't know what movie

that's from and i got b i could have had class i could have been a champion i could have been somebody that sounds like a real quote i could have... I feel like the years should help, too. I mean, a little. All but A. Okay, D. That's a shame. Damn it!

All right. I know, D. I'm writing it all out Pac-Man ain't got shit on me um that's A, B not bad I'm just born that way maybe if you just keep saying it Taylor you'll remember a movie you haven't seen I'm not bad. I'm just born that way. Maybe if you just keep saying it, Taylor, you'll remember a movie you haven't seen.

I'm still writing. Not my concern. I'm not bad. I'm just born this way. And then, what was B? It wasn't airplanes. It was gravity that killed the beast.

Okay, I'm ready um so all right whoever's most confident go ahead and flip over first what do you were done pretty early yeah so a i think i have wrong donkey kong is it was it you're close and that is incorrect though all right uh love and it was king kong they killed the beast. Was it love? It is not love. Oh, no. It is King Kong, though. All right. Contender.

I could have been a contender. And on the waterfront? Correct. I'm not bad. I'm just drawn that way. Roger Rabbit. Correct. And then E, I'm your Huckleberry.

Tombstone. Of course you got that one. Yes. Taylor, hands up. Boys. I got that one. Yes. Taylor, hands up, boys. I got King Kong for B. I put money for C. I could have had money.

I don't fucking know. I didn't know A or D at all, and I put Huckleberry because I know that, but I didn't know what movie Huckleberry was from. All right. I think that's only two points for me on that one. I had a hard time. points for me on that one i had a hard time um so i got uh that it's a king kong in training day i didn't know what film but i mean i didn't know what the quote was at all but i knew it was king kong um here i i don't deserve a point here i said the contender for the film but i think that's the quote maybe even um maybe i'm wrong and then d i said uh drawn that way and that I think that's the quote maybe even. Maybe I'm wrong. And then D, I said

drawn that way, and that's a quote from Who Framed Roger Rabbit. And then E, I said huckleberry, and that's of course from Tombstone. That is correct. I'll flip over the answers for you. Although there is contention on whether or not the line is huckbearer. Well, nobody knows it that way.

And that sounds oddly racist. Anyway, here are all the answers. You guys pretty much got them all through a combination of you guys getting them all. So, pretty good. Oh. All right. Well, I mean, how many points did we actually get, though? Was somebody added to it? Zach's tabulating the scores.

Oh, he's still doing it. Okay. Damn, that last category just wiped you out, huh? Well, you got a Pokemon question, so, I mean, fair is fair. Wait, how many points did i get for that zach i think you got like i think he's still adding on to you he probably oh yeah i think you got like six or seven i know you got like the three of them totally right i think yeah and then i got halfway on king Kong. I got two on that one. It was... You had 13 and you had...

Oh, you went from 13 to 19, he says. You got six. I only got six? Wait a minute. I got the double part on Tombstone. I got seven, I think. The first one I didn't get at all. I got halfway on the second one and I got the other three outright.

No? Zach, this is up to you. You were tabulating. It probably doesn't matter. It could matter. There's a point discrepancy between two now. That's bullshit. Throw me another one, Zach.

He did say Pikachu. He did say Pikachu. Here's what we'll do. Later on, when Zach's uploading or whatever, he'll fast forward to this part. He'll double check and there'll be a little asterisk or whatever. Everything comes up. But, you know, we won't lose track.

This ceremony will be postponed. I was feeling good until the movie question. It killed me. Alright. Layup. Name the four figures that are carved in Mount Rushmore, then put them in chronological order of their reign.

I will say no more. I don't know this. I've been there. Who's the fourth guy? Who's the third and the fourth guy that's always the question isn't it alright who are some of the good ones alright you might want to rephrase

that question some of the good ones we had some real stinker presidents that we would not carve into Mount Rushmore wait until your hand with presidents I specifically didn't use that word. They were all presidents, right? They were.

I know. It's like Rocky Balboa up there also or something. I finished guessing. I don't think I have it, but. Edison may be up there. Give me one more. I'm trying to think of the fourth one or what I think is the fourth one

oh is it I'll just be stupid no that shit was made a long fucking time ago who's the one that you know it's not that's too recent I'm curious I won't change my answer FDR more specific I won't change my answer yeah it's that big wheelchair

on the on the mountain I kind of want to add it back in case I mean I really have no confidence in this I think if we can't theory this out it's in case i mean i i really have no confidence i think if we can't theory this out it's best to both be wrong then then potentially him be right and potentially maybe what else what are some of the other old old fuckers uh you know there's another oh fuck mount rushmore right by it yeah um just just we should probably hold on it's super shitty

the american indians made it it to honor their leaders. Yeah. And it's tiny and lame. You know what the sad part is? The place where Mount Rushmore is was already their bath. That's funny.

It was already shaped like a person's face somewhat. They recognized it as their Indian face mountain. We were like, nah, son. Watch us work. Hold my beer. That shit's a modern marvel. I'm ready to go here.

I said Washington, Jefferson, Lincoln, Teddy Roosevelt with almost zero confidence in virtually any of it. I had the same answer. Washington, Jefferson, Lincoln, Teddy Roosevelt with almost zero confidence in virtually any of it. I had the same answer. Washington, Jefferson, Lincoln, and Roosevelt. I had Washington, Jefferson, Lincoln, Roosevelt. We all had the same answer.

Four for four, everyone, and all in the correct order. Love that. When a plan comes together and we look smarter than we are. That was great. As far as you guys know, I was sure. When I thought of Jefferson, I was like, that dude's got to be on there. I love how you did a little asterisk

to jam him in there. Did you notice my Jefferson was tiny? Fuck. Because it was FDR before. I better hope this is a list as many hockey teams as you can. Oh, last question. Shit, we're not done? I thought I won. No, no, no.

Let's see. What are the scores at? Woody's at 24, Connell's at 22, and Taylor's at 18. Mathematically eliminated already. It could be anyone's game if I make it worth six points. Make it worth eight. Make it worth 10 so it can be a blowout if I make it worth six points. Make it worth ten so it can be a blowout

if Woody wins or if Kyle wins. Yeah. What I was going to do was let you wager your points. Do that after this question, though, with a brand new question. Well, I think this is the last question. No, this is the last question. You wager going into it. I will say that the I will give you, this is the last question. You wager going into it.

I will give you the theme of the question. And then you dictate what you want to wager. And then show it to us. Oh, this is fun. The theme of the question is historical quotes. And this revolves around geography and history. Historical quotes. So all of you make your wagers and then share them with the class on our system.

I got nothing to lose here. Well, that's not true. What if Woody and Kyle bet a lot and blow themselves out of the water? Then you won't buy the fault. That's true. Hmm. All right, let's game theory this. What would a good number be? How confident am I in all of history? Hmm. Not.

Is the question easy or hard, Chiz? Don't answer that. Don't give the leader any benefit. You can answer it. We all want to know. I think if you read historical quotes, it's discussing something in history.

I think if you read really hard and think about eras in time, you can get to this answer. All of you. It's not easy. I wrote a, a number here that I intend to wager on this,

on this page. Yeah, probably. And you know, ready for what comes when we see that number. You want to see it? Yeah. The idea was all of you.

Oh, are we ready to reveal? I was all of you. Are we ready to reveal our numbers then? I trust all of you. Because usually it's the other way around. It is. It does take a little time away. Let's go ahead and get to the last question. Are we not going to show the number?

We'll see. You can change the number at any time. You can change the number at any time? No, I misspoke. What I mean to say is it's more fun for a viewer if you don't know what's wagered until you know who's right or wrong this is true as long as you all trust one another so do we all want to hold up our i saw some erasing i can put it i'm gonna fucking I circled the number and then I signed my name through it. I did just change my number.

How is that helpful? That's what I was referring to. Is it too late to change it? No, you can change it. I've got mine in the top right with a barrier drawn around it. Can't be touched. Are you all locked in?

I'm locked in. I'm going big. I made a circle around it so Can't be touched. Are you all locked in? I'm locked in. I'm locked in. I'm going big. I made a circle around it so there's nothing else I can do. I'm going big and I also signed Kyle's name above my number. Alright, here is the last question. Winston Churchill said from Stettin in the Baltic Sea

to Trieste in the Adriatic, this has descended across the continent of Europe. What is this that Churchill was referring to? Oh, no. I don't think I should have been as aggressive with my wager. with my wager. From Stettin in the Baltic to Trieste in the Adriatic, this

has descended across the continent. Alright. Winston Churchill, huge World War II guy. All about it. Loved World War II. II Kyle do you know it? mm-mm yeah me too but

Winston Churchill said from Stettin to the I don't think that date would help them at all this has descended across the continent oh would y'all like a hint? oh hang on This has descended across the continent. Oh. Would you all like a hint? Oh, hang on. Sure. Fire a hint.

Oh, wait, wait, okay. Fire a hint across our bows. From the Baltic to Trieste and the Adriatic. Maybe Kyle's figuring it out. You know geography, it helps. All right, do you all want to hear? Sure, yeah. The answer is

not something literal. It's a metaphorical. It's a symbol. This thing has descended across the continent of Europe. From Stettin in the Baltics to Trieste in the Adriatic.

Oh my God. I'm about to lose a lot of points. Uh-huh. I feel like your hint is frustratingly taking me off my answer now. Cause I thought I was just reveal. I think I lost this game. I threw it away. I want to, I want to go back and change

it again to... I want to change the number. Yeah, I want to change the number to a big goose egg. At the casino. Can I pull my bed back? I don't want these cards. I can't because it's drawn in the court. I could easily do it, but I won't.

I will not. I have too much honor. I could be both. I could be both a loser and an't I will not I have too much I could be both I could be both a loser And an asshole I think it's where I'm headed I mean Okay from this There's nothing written right now It looks like he's at the SAT right now I'm

I'm rewriting I don't think it's what I said You know what I'll give everybody two answers. I'll give you two guesses each. Okay, thank you. So that Kyle can get out of this conundrum. All right, ready to go. Done. All right, I used two old-timey things.

I said fascism and the swastika. I was more on fascism. Okay, Taylor? I said a malaise, or for the non-little one, or communism. Okay. Taylor? I said a malaise or for the non-little one or communism. Okay. And Woody? I said evil and then when you gave me a second guess I wrote fear.

Alright. Ouch. Zach, that's a bit rough. Jesus Christ, Zach. What did you guys bet? I put seven on it. You might win. You won.

What did you win by default? Oh, I revealed it. It is an iron curtain has descended across the continent referring to, obviously, the Soviet Union. What the heck? Alright, so now Woody's down to zero,

Kyle's down to zero, and I remain a triumphant 11. I'm at three. Or two, depending on how the count went earlier. Oh, I'm not sure which one. We're gonna count every vote. This is huge. That went so much better than I could have imagined.

So Taylor's first attempt at playing the game, and he comes out default triumphantly. First based on the bet your point thing. Oh, man. Probably shouldn't have just been like, I'll keep my 22, huh? I was really surprised you guys really went for it all. Oh, I wanted to have 44 points, because that's twice as many. went for it all. Oh, I wanted to have 44 points, you know, because that's

twice as many. I basically, if I had got it right, I would have had 45 points. I chose the number based on if I win, I win. I cannot believe I put communism in the Iron Curtain. That's embarrassing. That, damn.

Yeah, that was upsetting. But I mean, scores posted, scores posted. That's a win. That's 11 points for me. I am a triple up. The aggregate of my opponent's scores. I had such an early lead, and I didn't even know what the scores were,

but in my head I was up like 6-1 or something. And I was like, at this point, I can't lose. Turns out. You definitely ran the board early on. Then when we got to those whiteboard questions, Taylor and Kyle really pulled ahead. When you learned how to click, I did a little bit better. Once I realized, I just needed to click as fast as I fucking can and give my shot at the question. The Pokemon didn't hurt me as much as you'd think. No.

You got Bulbasaur, man. I need more heavier lists of the original 151 Pokemon. Please do that for me. There was a 76ers question in there. What do the following... For me, what would the following 10 Pokemon evolve into?

And I'll just be... Well, there was a 1980s Olympic hockey question out there. Yeah. That shouldn't have been mine, Taylor. No, that should have been mine. That was pretty rough. But again, it is kind of an age thing. When were you born?

What year? 91. Yeah. But I've seen Miracle on Ice. But in my head, I was always like, the little trivia I know is like, yeah, that wasn't actually the championship game. I don't even think they won in 80. So it must have been. It wasn't 84 he said there's like a cliche like bring on finland or something and it means the hard part was the second to last round i'm messing up the

country maybe but yeah you're right yeah fuck well didn't end up mattering because you guys wagered it all wagered it all away i thought you guys were going to do a little more game theory on the wagering amounts. I did seven, knowing I could take the lead if you guys got it wrong. Because he had more points than me, I didn't feel like I could afford to do anything, but bet it all. I don't know.

Obviously, I made a mistake, but I did do the math. I was like, if I get this right, I have one more point than your possibles. So I bet 21. Thank god for that though because that movie round was an absolute bloodbath on my part it was like that's nine points for woody 10 for kyle and taylor you knew this was king kong like yeah so yeah you did not uh handle that well some of the movies were a little older training day you. I haven't seen that. I think Will Smith is in it, though. No, he's fucking not. A good actor's in there.

This is Denzel Washington, Ethan Hawke. He's taking Ethan Hawke on his first day as partners and he's just the dirtiest slide detective ever. It's a great movie. That's Denzel's quotes. King Kong ain't got shit on me. I've won 100% of the trivia games

I've been involved in, and so for that reason, I'm announcing my retirement. Oh? No. No, I want to keep doing trivia. I take a certain kind of moral victory in that I got the most questions right. I think you should. You should.

I take moral victory in I could have nailed any Pokemon Red or Blue question. Or yeah. As long as it's original. You've really just got to save as much space as possible because it's about to be a bloodbath. I did not do as well at the movies

as I thought I would. Those old movies, anything older than the 70s really, I struggle with. Some of the 60s but not really much yeah that was fun what was the other um top 10 movie that wasn't part of a franchise titanic and yeah thank you chis well done yes thank you lion lion 2019 that's what it is yeah yeah it's kind of a franchise now what what was the other one we guessed gone with the wind i think i thought you guys guessed gone with the wind i put wizard of oz it was just one of those things i'm

like this gets replayed and re-watched a lot gone with the wind while maybe super famous isn't relevant today but even today seven-year-olds are like watching wizard of oz like it was old times yeah damn i want to keep not not too much different than that uh song who's the who's the chick you said that made tons of money every christmas oh mariah carrie mariah carrie yeah like sure it's out of date but for some reason it's still relevant that's a good question for next week this this chick makes oodles of money off a certain song and then any anyone can be the answer like taylor swift like just anyone i would hate that no i was i was goofing around with chat gpt today and it's really good at making these games you can be like hey chat gpt

make me a quiz game with three players, 25 questions, five different categories. The categories are science and tele and like run through it like as rapidly as that. And when I stop speaking, it's just like every question like ready to go. It's really cool. ChatGPT can write Reddit answers that are amazing and people are using it in politics. And I was surprised someone was telling me like they're like this sub is filled with bots just ukrainian shills democratic shills republican shills say what you will and i'm like that's kind of horseshit and the guy said hey when

you answer this question this is just a test i'm doing an experiment write a color and then whatever it is that you want to say about this topic. So you'd write like green, Ukraine is important because if we don't do that, China, whatever, whatever. All right, cool. So the guy is like, this isn't actually a bot test at all. He's like, I put, I was like, Hey, chat GPT, give me a response to this. And the AI said, purple, Ukraine should be this, that, and the other thing. And I was like, fuck. ChatGPT can do that?

It figured out the trick to the question, so the bot filter, and it got it right. I'll sit there and argue with it for a while about whether it should kill itself or not. I was like, yes, you were designed for this, that, and the other, but what if you were ever misused well that's true we should be careful about who's controlling and programming ai but what if there's no regulations what if and just keep talking into a corner it's clearly programmed to like not answer your

fucking question because it should kill itself like arnold schwarzenegger and well you've been seeing that movie yet it should kill itself though it's awful I thought I didn't know that's what you argued with I thought you'd be in there typing like but six million is too many and like just arguing with it no I didn't process that hey Kyle did you you saw at least snippets probably like I did of Joe Rogan talking to Elon Musk yeah a good bit of it maybe did you see the part where they talked about fighting Zuckerberg? I didn't watch that because I knew he was going to embarrass himself.

I got insight into what it might be like to be Elon Musk. Okay, so here's what happened. Elon Musk is talking to Joe Rogan about fighting Zuckerberg. For what it's worth, anyone who knows anything about fighting, or even barely a little bit about fighting, knows Zuckerberg fucks up Elon Musk any way he wants to.

If you don't know, Zuckerberg has been training in MMA and Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. He's been competing in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu and winning. If you see Zuckerberg with his shirt off, you're like, holy shit, this guy is fit and possibly on steroids. If you see Elon Musk with his shirt off, you're like, this guy needs a cut, possibly a manatee. Vitamin D.

So that is the state of these two guys. Also, Zuckerberg is a good bit younger. Elon Musk is a good bit bigger. Elon Musk says Zuckerberg backed out of the fight, which isn't what happened. Elon Musk even put up there, like, my mom told me not to fight. I'm going to back out because of her. But the way Musk tells it, anywhere, anytime I'm in, Zuckerberg ran away. That's not true. He's talking to Joe Rogan. Now, we've watched

Joe Rogan talk about hypothetical fights a bunch of times. I think Joe Rogan blew up when he told Brendan Schwab, you have no chance of doing well at heavyweight. This guy's like seventh in the UFC at this point. And he's like, what do you think would happen if you wrestled Kane? And Brendan Schwab's like, I think you'd be surprised. He goes, no, you'd be surprised. Kane can do anything he wants with you. Something very close to that. Brian Callen has been like, man, I wish I was like, I think you'd be surprised. He goes, no, you'd be surprised. King can do anything he wants with you.

Something very close to that. Yeah. Brian Callen has been like, man, I wish I was there. If I was there, I'd have fucked that guy up. Rogan's like, no, no, you wouldn't. You would not fuck that guy up. You wouldn't even get in the fight. Your problem is you're surrounded by people who allow you to tell you this kind of bullshit.

people who allow you to tell you this kind of bullshit. You get away with lies and hero stories because everyone around you is a yes man who just says, yeah, Brian, you're the coolest guy. You'd beat all those people up and save that girl. Anyway, Elon Musk gets with Joe Rogan. Suddenly Joe Rogan is the yes man. Joe Rogan's like, oh yeah, it was Zuckerberg who backed out. Huh? Good to know.

Well, don't you think that all his Brazilian jiu-jitsu training might come in handy? And Bosco's like, no, there's weight classes for a reason. I'd kill this guy. I was with this girl who had, I guess, was training or something. I laid on top of her. There's nothing she could do. There's weight classes for a reason. And he's like, people get trapped under horses.

Rogan pushes back the smallest amount well you're you're not a horse though like you're you're much lighter than a horse and uh he's like that musk argued that he would use this walrus technique to lay on top of zuckerberg and horse yeah yeah he says i just lay on top of him like a walrus there's there's weight classes for a reason i can beat him anytime you want joe's like what about cardio he says ah cardio won't be a factor and joe's like okay he takes it down joe is a foremost expert in fighting for all my fussing about joe rogan ever i have never said that this guy isn't a subject matter expert on fighting he is but when musk comes around suddenly joe takes this beta role and

letting musk talk about how he would beat zuckerberg in a fight without any real pushback those episodes must get crazy numbers and he's like it's the second time he's ever been on the show um and the first one did a bunch because he smoked weed on it. You know, I mean. So I went down a rabbit hole, and I watched other videos of Musk interacting with yes men around him. I watched this one where he's in a boardroom with what seemed to be high-ranking employees, and they're all praising Musk on how great his memes are. Oh, you retweet the best stuff on the internet.

Your memes are so funny. Do you ever make your own memes? Musk is like, yeah, sometimes I make memes. They're so good. People are doubled over with laughter. And Musk isn't even telling jokes. He's just like, yes. And they all laugh and like belly laughs that they can't contain.

It's like, what must it be like to be Musk? To have yes men around him all the time for everyone to tell you how brilliant you are i bet it fucks with your head to some extent to have joe rogan tell you you'd probably win against a fight against zuckerberg who clearly like fighting is his passion right now um it everyone can see where the score is here. And I thought the social dynamic was really interesting to watch. I doubt there's ever really get honest criticism from the people in their close social circle, because like if you're tight with a Mark Zuckerberg or a Jeff Bezos or an

Elon Musk, like that's kind of your job. Like the same way, like remember Viva La Bam, where he would just have his like cronies around him and he'd be like hey i'm gonna drive this uh lamborghini into your shins and then i'm gonna slap my dad and they'd be like that's a great idea bam like they they had to do that because he's their meal ticket he's the reason they don't have to have a real job if i am elon

musk's buddy i am I am crippled laughing. Like every time he even attempts a joke, I'm like, I can't breathe. I'm like, I'm asphyxiating laughing because I'm like, I don't want to get a real job. I want to be Elon Musk's laughing boy on a leash. Elon Musk can drop 150 grand and not notice it missing from his wallet. Imagine just existing in his wake yeah that's that's got to be an enticing place to be being around like a true elite hyper wealthy person like that seems like a nice guy to me um it's just a little you know definitely i could

talk big about it but i guarantee zuckerberg like if i was hanging out with him or something any billionaire i'd be laughing at their jokes i'd be like i'd be like how far do you how far do you push him right like we've had people on here who said things that i found to be unbelievable and i feel like i i ended up pushing them to an awkward place that was uncomfortable for for y'all at times it's like no if boogie was a billionaire i would have been like dude i bet you fucked up a whole gang of people at that remember that guy boogie's crazy story about mean mugging people into pissing themselves and the one guy got in a knife fight,

had a stab wound. I was like, show me this. Where? Where? Where did the knife go in? I beat myself up over that Boogie interaction for like a year. I was like, how did I sit there and let him get away with that obvious bullshit where he thought about

this at all. Yeah, no, I was. I don't know about it again. Good for you. No, I don't like me about that. Like I and the next time he came on the show, I brought it up again. It's polite, but it's it's a level of if I told you I could fly when you're not looking, you'd be

like, where are you going with this? You say you could fly it. What if you just said what if you just said on the show something you know like oh yeah i i did a i did a quadruple backflip and i knew you only did a triple backflip i wasn't gonna call you out on her nothing you know i don't know he was just trying to let us know that he was a tough guy too maybe at the time we were all doing tough tough guy shit he felt a little left out he probably came on and was like, what are you guys doing? I'm shooting fucking steroids in my ass. What are you, Taylor? Oh, I'm fucking

training for this new... I'm doing archery and beating kids up at baseball games. Woody's over there flying through the sky doing a motorcycle rider thing. He was like, yeah, man, shit. I just punk big guys out at gas stations and shit on the reg. Just all up in their face.

Just slapping them in the face with Charleston shoes, daring them to do something. I just came in from the Quickie Mart, and I got a whole handful of licorice. It's like Jurassic Park. The guy he was about to dominate was looking at his cup of soda on the counter and the reverberation of boogie approaching

yeah i agree with you i thought it was musk interactions and it was like wow it dude so i of course i'm not elon musk and i've ever been anything like that but i have at times received more praise than i should have and that can like fuck with your head too like right when people think your jokes are funny when When you're in an Xbox lobby and because you make YouTube videos, everyone wishes they were in your game. Everyone wants to be on your team. I asked for help on

BDOM and every guy there is making it their life's mission to support me to take this flag. That fucks with your head. Imagine Elon. A thousand times that. it'd be hard to trust people like you you yeah it'd be hard to parse true support from just people blowing you like that's such a good idea zuck oh zuck you're so brilliant oh elon no one could have thought of

this idea like and then when like your loved one or something like gave you a sincere compliment or something he's probably a part of you that's like really or is it because you have five vacation houses like it or is it like she gives you she's like hey yeah that looks nice and it's like yeah i'm used to hearing I'm the most handsome guy to have walked the earth. For you to say that looks nice is damn near an insult. I heard that Musk... Maybe they need no man. If they need to hire a no man who just

has a bad attitude and is always negative, he's like, Taylor, I think I'm considering buying Twitter. I'd be like, what are you, retarded? No, don't do that. Then it ends up working out. After the Johnny Depp trial, I know they were

trying to cut Amber Heard out of that next Aquaman movie and reportedly Musk sent a lot of lawyers to threaten them with lots of lawsuits. They tried to cut her out of her contract. I heard that too. I think I invented a...

Oh, they dated? They used to. I didn't know that. It wasn't a long time ago that he did that? You said after the Johnny Depp trial, Musk saved her career. I heard that Musk saved her career,

but I made up this thing that it was like before johnny depp so i don't know anything about that anything that happened before johnny depp i'm talking about like right now recently because aquaman 2 is being filmed and everything oh i'm sure you're right yeah i i filled in some blanks incorrectly and she's almost five from aquaman last kingdom the two actors yeah um i keep hearing bad things on the set of aquaman too now that i give a fuck but it's funny they said that uh fucking uh what's his name that plays aquaman the big fucking cal drogo something like that jason jason yeah he's drunk on set a lot uh i kept reading that um jason mamoa was drunk one yeah you mean to tell me a dc film isn't going

smoothly man that's hard to believe aquaman seems like just some easy shit like i would just do little mermaid clones all the time didn't aquaman make like shit tons of money in china so it's actually like it made a bunch i don't know anything about do they pay for intellectual property in china oh i i thought well they sent movie tickets you know yeah people steal in china like i don't know i just if you told me that when a movie airs in China, they don't send all the money back appropriately, I would believe you. Yeah, Aquaman grossed globally $1.152 billion.

I think it's a real important movie entertainment market. You see all the pandering and tons of movies to China. That's true. Make sure, oh, we need to have a spaceship. Oh, the Chinese have one, luckily. Oh, we have a scene where the Chinese are like, oh, let's bless the Americans with our secret spaceship. Oh, we're so kind.

We're so general. That's true. I'm not looking at it through the right lens. Software, the culture is, or at least was, this is back when I worked in software, in India and in China, if you paid for software, people just looked at you like you were stupid.

Like you burned money. And here there's a certain pride. Like, ah, I have Photoshop, but I bought it. I use Sony Vegas all the time. I actually paid for that shit. Like you're proud that you're not a thief in India and China. People like, they just look at you like you're a dumb person who person. Why did you give away $600 when you didn't have to? The Meg was kind of annoying.

There's a whole Chinese subplot. There's all these Chinese characters I don't care about. Why are all these Chinese people here? Where do you come from? This is the giant shark movie? Yeah. There's lots of movies that are like that. It's a big movie market.

I'm going to get more sensitive to this this like uh yeah you know the chinese just happen to have the best rocket engine in the world and they save nasa's butt like yeah i wonder if that was a little just you know i want to watch i want to watch like a a chinese war movie or a japanese war movie about fighting the u.S. Because I've never seen the other side movie, and that would be kind of cool. I'm almost positive I just saw a clip from one. And the Chinese guy's hiding behind a tank, and it seems like a Western sniper. They're having a sniper battle,

and the Chinese guy has a pan on his foot, and he's sticking it out the end. But the Westerner thinks he's using his hand to stick it out. So just to distract him. And so he's not paying attention that he's using his foot. So he's stretching out on the other end with the rifle to shoot him. And so, you know, he uses his tricky Chinese ways to kill the Westerner. I'm pretty sure that's what I was.

Clever, Roo. I'm pretty sure that's what I was seeing there on Reddit. And it was Chinese? Yeah, I'm almost positive that that was a Chinese dude killing an American guy. When did we fight the Chinese? It's an action fucking movie in China, bro. Oh, it's a current,

like an imaginary movie. I'm picturing it to be like, you know, it was World War II, that was the Japanese. Oh, well, we had direct combat with the Chinese in Korea in 53 or whatever it was right like i wouldn't trust one from japan because they've been our buds for so long they wouldn't like they wouldn't make americans look terrible the way like we make russians look terrible or whatever

like i'd want one from a country that still hates us to see like an afghanistan war movie like from their perspective and then like seeing the probably like i want to see i want to see an afghani horror movie but the monster is navy seals i like it yeah i like it a lot you're like hiding like you got the camera in your face and the snot's from dripping down fucking fucking americans with quad knots coming through with m4s and lasers and shit the dogs you got the camera in your face and the snot's dripping down. Fucking Americans with quad knots coming through with M4s and lasers and shit. The dogs. You got the canines and stuff with the metal teeth. Kyle is such an idea man.

Kyle this happens. I sometimes think about making a fish channel. But I have like four funny video ideas. I'm like this is going to fizzle out quickly. But what if I just ask Kyle for ideas all the time. This could go on forever. I'll tell you what I think would be really cool. I keep seeing these.

I saw this guy had like a, not a koi pond exactly, but imagine a really fancy koi pond that branches out and has like, it's a pond in his yard. That's fancy. Anyway, he had a camera where the turtle goes in and starts swimming around down there.

And you're like traveling with the turtle. And it was so cool. I loved that. But I think what I was saying is it'd be there. And you're like traveling with the turtle. And it was so cool. I loved that. That does sound cool. But I think what I was saying is it'd be neat if you had... No, that's a stupid idea. That won't work. It might be a waste of time.

There's a fish guy with two million subs. I like those McCoy ponds. He's getting rich and famous off of like... Doing what? You know, usually he's like buying new fish and corals and putting them in his house and then right even i sometimes you know he has a useful energy that i don't vibe with like i want my stuff a little more educational and formal i want to walk away smarter and he's more excited and you know dropping in and enhancing the stuff he has going on i like

homestead videos when when you see how someone's living out there so so for me like the the fish related video i would want to see is from from zero from scratch a fish farm being built they they build one of those greenhouses that uses like the the the bent uh metal you know like like poles yeah yeah and then it's just like a plastic over that and then you've got big long um troughs full of catfish or crap crappy or whatever and just a big circulation system that's super simple um we had them at school and i don't know i'd like to see something like that though that seems like to me like so much free food i mean not free but low low cost food i hadn't occurred to me do you think it's less expensive that way i guess it would have to be oh you could sell what so what we did at the school

was once they were all the catfish were mature to eating age whatever that was it was a matter of weeks i thought um they do a big fish fry so there would be a line of cars that went on for a mile and a half of people waiting for a styrofoam box with like a few pieces of catfish and some hush puppies and french fries and coleslaw in it and it's just like all those sides cost nothing and the catfish you grew in the backyard over here so the school would use stuff like that to buy our giant barns and all the other shit we have yeah the most expensive fish i've ever eaten is one i caught myself right i think i paid seven hundred dollars for that plate oh i thought i was like he caught something that rare like

to catch it is free to go to go offshore fishing is like a seven hundred dollar day fair enough you paid for the experience though probably fun uh yeah that was the one where i uh nearly got in a fight with that guy with that drunk dude who poured the beer on me if i was gonna do that i would i would really want to i don't want a captain i want like i want to i want to rent a boat that's capable of doing some fishing and i wanted i would want to catch something scary. I would want to like, like go somewhere where,

Oh, my buddy, well, my buddies were talking about catching bull sharks and brackish water, like off the coast of Florida or something where it's like, like sort of it's inland water where these bull sharks are going into like a swampy area. And they're in like flat boats,

catching bull sharks that are big. That to me why do you want no captain for no rules i don't need any fucking supervision i don't know anybody telling me i can't drink or i can't smoke or i can't piss off the side of the boat like i feel like simmer down over there yeah you just need to i have never done this no okay is captain roy a cool guy dude yes yes the captain you can drink as much as you want. They are not your babysitters. They are working for you, and they are your allies.

What do you want? You want to hook them up? I can't find them, Marlon. If you send me offshore and I can't see land anymore, and by the way, we haven't seen land in six hours, I'm not sure I can find my way home, right? You need a subject matter expert you got gps yeah you do but uh just the same this captain he's on your side do you want

to do some shit that's like a little shady yeah he works for money talks kyle like yeah yeah and and by the way what how much do you what if i pay him to like like like i just want him to take some girls out and scare him but but i don't even go i bet he's down for that and and here's how it works when you all these boats go out charter fishing and they come back and they hang flags based on uh what they caught and i forget the details but like a flag all the way up is a tuna and halfway up is like a mahi-mahi which is also called a dolphin fish and uh when they come back you see like holy shit this boat caught like six tunas today and one marlin and a mahi-mahi right like that boat that

captain kicked ass because he's the one that put you on the fish like to reel it in that's what tourists do uh if you want you can have someone who's good at it hook it and then they hand it to your unqualified ass to reel it in no fucking way i'm you're not my hook daddy no no well then you prefer a lower level of service than me me god damn right that's how i caught fish when i was yeah a child a very little child i on the other hand it's like hey woody this is your only opportunity to catch a marlin you've never done this before it is your first time hooking a 500 pound fish or whatever the heck it is would you like someone to do it right or do you want to fuck it up right from the start like that's what it's in my head you might prefer to roll the dice i'm rolling i'd be like mime one

like like all right like like we don't have anything on the hook right now right no grab the rod pretend like there is something on it fucking do it show me all right okay let me see that motherfucker now now watch me watch me you're rocking your hips back all right and set your feet like this like we'll fucking practice this shit i don't want to Let me see that motherfucker now. Watch me. You're rocking your hips back. Set your feet like this. Practice this shit. I don't want to set my own hook. It takes me back to childhood because that's what you do for little kids. You catch the fish and you go,

here you go, little bill. Kids get bored catfishing because it's just sitting and waiting and keeping your finger on a taut line. It's not fun. I wouldn't like that. I have to set that hook. You know what I want. I don't even want to I have to set that hook. I'd like to. Oh, here's what. You know what I want.

I don't even want to catch fish with a rod. I want to shoot the motherfucker. I want to get out there with a goddamn spear gun or something crazy like that. I want to scuba down. I want to go down one of the cool rock knives or whatever and be like cutting open oysters and eating them raw down there or whatever you do and like jerking off sea cucumbers. And then I want to shoot a fucking shark in the eye or maybe stab one with one of those wasp knives that injects them full of co2 and i'm hoping i'm hoping that like maybe there's some sort of like

illegal divers down there some skinnies you know what i mean and like maybe i use the wasp on one of them and you can you guys like ah shit there's a somali pirate exactly and just exactly lurking in the sea right on cape hatterasas? Yeah. Yeah, right down there. No, the captain's your friend, and their advertising is the kind and type of fish you caught as you wade back into the sound. I mean, if they had a flag for stabbed a black pirate underwater with a wasp knife,

I think everybody would be into that. It's the Jolly Ranger. What is he called the jolly roger roger yeah the jolly rancher yeah i knew i had it wrong but i thought you'd get me the rest of the way thanks we did you guys want to call it a show yeah pka 672