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Painkiller nearly 184. We're dying to start.
Kick it!
So Kyle, you have to catch me up on everything.
Oh man, alright, so where to begin?
So when Wings is streaming, his chat sort of picks at him with repeatedly asking the same questions until he's forced to answer
whether he's got a fully formed thought or not or at least that's how he feels at times and so i guess
is kind of a tough spot right i'm sorry you're laying it out i'm great you're gonna do great but
i feel like if i was live streaming and i was asked about a thing 1700 times, then it would be hard
for me not to reply. Yes. So I suppose he was asked about Keemstar and he went on this Keemstar
rant that almost needs to be seen to be understood. He's like, Keemstar is the worst human being alive. He said at one point if
Sharia law were ever introduced he'd be the first one to go after to chop off
their hands and feet. He is despicable human being who deserves to die. He is a
scammer of children and burn clinic survivors. So just so I can get this
straight in my head, yeah Wings is making Sharia law based, you know, like,
I'll go to Keemstar.
I'm just trying to get the right.
I don't know where Sharia law came in there,
but I know that's part of the story.
Yeah, I'm just quoting the man himself, OK?
I know that Sharia law really wouldn't
affect Keemstar necessarily.
I mean, he's got the beard for it.
He'd be OK.
But these are
Wings of Redemption's words, okay? I'm just trying to track this. It's not a traditional story.
You need a bloodhound and a couple of years. You're never gonna fully understand the man
himself. This is like a memento. Like, I'm trying to put pieces into place.
It requires real law. So he went on this rant, you know, Keem deserves to die. That is basically his message. And he
went for like two minutes about how Keem deserves to die and how he's the one who
most deserves to die. He even said, I have known some despicable human beings. I can only think
of one person who maybe deserves to die more. And hey, that guy beat someone to death with a hammer and went to prison for it.
So maybe he's worse than Keemstar, but I don't even know.
He may be worse than the Conway Hammerer.
It's hard to tell.
So Keemstar took exception to this for some reason.
Who can imagine?
He's very sensitive.
And he was like you know
it sounds like you're threatening my life it sounds like you're at the very least directing
your followers to to to kill me can i interrupt yeah keemstar is playing victim here keemstar
yeah he knows wings is absolutely not issuing a death threat right he is wishing upon a star that in some alternative
universe where some alternative version of sharia law was in order that keemstar would die but wings
is not planning a death or directing anyone to kill him or anything like that so what keemstar
does in reaction to this is tweets at twitch and says i don't want to misquote him but something to the effect of
oh my gosh do something about this this man's issuing death threats against me
keemstar is going after wings of redemption's livelihood and only lifeboat to this surgery
to the next episode of his life to be fair there was that incident a few years ago remember where
and they got brought up in
the call, though neither one of them could remember it nearly as well as I can. I could have messed
it up too. The way he was going to hire a hitman to break some guy's fingers. Yeah, let me, let me
fast forward, like, like lay that situation out. Here's what actually happened because somehow I
got drug into it. Like I was part of that scenario and I really wasn't but what have actually happened is this because I remember all these
bullshit little scenarios there was a youtuber called that guy who camps very
nice young man I say that because he was 16 or 17 years old at the time I believe
he had alopecia where all your hair falls out it was very unfortunate he
helped me out a ton he helped a lot of youtubers that he allowed me to upload a video to his channel. It went super viral. It got
like 600,000 views in a couple days. Boosted my subscribers by tens of thousands. It was
very helpful to me. And he did that for lots of people. Great guy.
He actually drew me poorly. I could tell my story after the flow.
Maybe he didn't like you. Loved me. Had a great relationship with him. Let me do it
in 10 seconds.
I'm having so much difficulty tracking all this drama he was going to make a video with a sort of my opinion on woody
and i was like hey you know what knock yourself out but why don't you talk to me and we'll make
sure that it's like everything you say is kind of factually correct and it's not going to come
from like the porn stars and keem stars of the world we talked, and he decided not to make the video. Oh.
That's where it was going down.
Well, that sounds kind of like a neutral scenario.
He was like, ah, after I met you, I don't think I can make a nice video.
I'll just step away from the table.
In any case.
Yeah, that was his video.
How much I admire Woody's game for tagging.
And you're like, let's make sure these are facts, sir.
And he's like, crossing things off the list.
Oh, I guess you're right.
That's funny.
Anyway, so at this point, Kyle, back to the drama at hand.
Is this happening on a stream?
Is this happening on Twitter?
I could do it very quickly.
Okay.
So that guy who camps is in a tiff with Wings of Redemption
over some bullshit gaming stuff. Wings is talking about that guy who camps and videos poorly. And that's in that day. That's quite a few people to that guy who camps videos and they're attacking him. They're flagging his videos.
and says, I'm being attacked by big, bad Wings of Redemption.
And I don't even know why.
So Keemstar, who at the time is the man over on Ustream,
I believe, on that streaming service,
he literally had the biggest stream on that entire service for gaming at the very least.
He goes on a tear one night.
He's like, go to Wings of Redemption's channel.
And he's streaming himself on Wings of Redemption's channel.
He's like, flag this video and flag that video.
Flag all the videos.
And so Wings gets like 30 strikes.
And as a Machinima partner, Machinima gets like 30 strikes.
So they get on the phone to Geordi and they're like,
look, you got to sort this out or we're cutting you loose.
You're about to take the whole ship down like your junkyard or something.
So they put together this meeting
of the minds where I believe it was Fwiz who mediated it. Could be wrong about that, but
a machinima spokesperson, he mediates this meeting of Wings of Redemption and Keemstar
over gaming footage and they're supposed to hash all this this out so at the very end of they're hashing it out which seems to be going very positively wings is like i just want to
check on a few things keem um do you still live at 17 49 bridge street over in blah blah blah and
he's like um what are you doing is your girlfriend's name still Maurice Ponderosa? Where are you going
with this? And he starts laying out all the, he's like, oh, no, no, I'm just trying to make sure
my information's correct. And Wings is sort of basically laying out to Keem that he has
researched him, and he's ready to, quote unquote, pull the trigger on a hit of some kind.
Jordy is the kind of man who at one point was going to send Sharif
to hammer a pro gamer's hands and break them
because that man had scammed Jordy out of a couple of thousand dollars.
Wings had paid this man to be part of a pro gaming team.
This man took the money, went to a different programming team and Wings thought, I'll just break his hands because I'm Tony Soprano.
I think he paid for the man's travel expenses, if I recall. Yeah.
Yeah.
The same thing.
Sure. Yeah. He's going to break the man's hands. So, you got to keep, that's present during
the day's drama.
Okay, I'll log that.
Right? That Wings has contemplated doing something to Keem in real life before.
So maybe Keem thought of that. It would have been interesting if that got brought up in the whole debate, but it didn't.
So I'm talking to Chiz, and all of a sudden he's like, oh, they're going to fucking debate on Wings Twitch.
And I was already on Wings Twitch, of course, as I always am during the day.
He's playing music, chilling with subscribers. Things are going fine. All of a sudden enters
Keemstar. And I'm watching the viewer number at the bottom. He's got like 380 people in there.
480, 580, 680, 780, 1080, 1300 people watching now. And they start debating and they go at it
for an hour. And it is a shit show. Is the money flowing in?
No, no. He made like $275 or something like that. Someone donated 20 somethings for like, what do you get in here?
Stop looking at high T women.
I don't understand.
Yeah, that's $2.
Okay.
$2.
Yeah.
Yeah.
The bits, like a thousand bits is like a dollar, I think, or $10.
Excuse me.
So maybe that was $20.
Now to think about it.
Cause I've given him a thousand bits.
It might have been 20 bits though.
It might have been 20 bits, though.
So that's a very small amount of money at 20 bits there.
And I don't even know what that is.
It's like 20.
Or is it $2?
That might be $2.
All right, point being.
It was a real shit show.
Because Wings can't debate.
He doesn't know how to do that.
And it just kept going in all these
weird directions argument it was more of an argument and it didn't make any sense and keem
definitely got the best of it at one point keem's like why did you get kicked off your own podcast
well they were wings like well there were a lot of reasons i did a lot of things you know and uh
he's and keem's like he's he's like know, it was that survival trip when you bitched out.
That's what did it.
And he's like, well, that was part of the equation.
Yes, yes.
He's right.
He's like, you know what you should do?
Keem is just constantly like going around anything Wings has to say against him
and like throwing old shit in Wings' face and then telling him how to fix it
and like taking control of the whole thing.
He's like, you should go on your own survival trip and redeem yourself survival trip of redemption even if you
do it in your backyard and and and wings is like man i can't even walk to the mailbox he's like
we'll do it in your backyard then anywhere get there and do it hey chat you want wings to go
on a survival trip of redemption press one and. And the chat goes, brrrr.
Just a thousand ones at the speed of light are flashing up there.
You know, I'm not Keem's biggest fan, but that was pretty good.
It was great.
Yeah, that was pretty good.
Keem, one notch in your column.
And Keem says, all right, well, let's do this.
How about this?
You've got these millionaire friends.
You got all these people who supposedly love you.
They won't give you a dime.
I'll give you $25,000.
I'll pay for your entire American weight loss surgery.
If you fight me in one year, if you fight me in one year in the ring wings, how about that?
Now, now real quick.
Is this a real promise of i will i will genuinely
give you 25 grand or is this you know bloviated look he's got the money he's i believe he has the
money yeah you can look at it if you were professional youtubers so we can estimate his
channel uh revenue probably better than average and i think he has the money he does have a long
history of exaggerating his wealth um well you know you know, he's done all those games.
And he's a millionaire.
And then probably a couple times over.
Probably.
I don't know.
YouTube AdSense is not a great way to get rich.
Like, it doesn't pay as well as owning a business or whatever.
But I just know he was broke after FortressCraft pretending to be rich.
But I see what his channel's earning
and i think he's doing great now yeah yeah he's got the money and the thing about this is it would
it would pay for itself if he did it in the promotion and however you sold it like like he
wouldn't lose money paying wings of redemption twenty five thousand dollars to fight him he'd
make money back he probably would how would you monet monetize that? I mean, you don't actually get a direct TV deal or anything.
With that KSI fight, they had like a million viewers
on both channels watching that thing, right?
Like live.
Oh, did they do it?
I believe so.
I'm not positive.
I thought it was a future thing.
I don't know.
It could be.
This would have been like two birds with one stone for wings
too, because it would force him to get in like not intensely good shape
but good enough shape that he could fight Keemstar for like, what, a year from now?
Yeah.
Like a St. Valentine's Day mask.
So what you're saying is that Wings has been lacking motivation all this time.
And I'm saying I don't know that there's any motivation.
So like this whole bariatric surgery thing,
and I want to go off on a tangent too long.
What it does for you is it gives you the discipline you don't actually have.
Right.
It's forced discipline.
It's not easier in that you do suffer a lot to lose this weight,
but it is easier in that you don't have to provide your own willpower
it's surgically implanted willpower that's what that's what it's all about and uh if you think
that a fight coming up in a year is you know like sort of almost parallel to surgically implanted
willpower i would argue against that, it would be for me.
I was thinking like, I'm just putting myself in wing shoes.
I'm like, fucking say yes.
And go on a Rocky montage, right?
Like, like get yourself a trainer, vlog this shit, a couple of vlogs a week of
you doing your boxing training, your weight loss training, forget the surgery.
We're going to pocket this money because now the weight loss journey
is about getting in shape to fight Keemstar.
That's an excellent point.
We lose 150 pounds in this year.
We show up to the ring 300 pounds of overweight.
Lean, mean, fighting machine.
I wouldn't go that far.
Let's just go with fighting machine.
A big rig, yeah.
Yeah, that would be it.
Ooh, that's a good fighting name.
Oh, yes.
Wings at 300 pounds would beat up Keem at 200 pounds.
And Keem's at 250 right now.
He's planning on losing a lot of weight this year.
And I'm sure he would want to get trained up and get ready for this boxing match.
You know, if you give him a year's worth of time.
My money would be on Wings, though, in that scenario.
If both spent a year training and going forward, Wings is just the bigger guy.
He's about two or three inches taller.
Yeah, a couple inches taller.
And also losing that fat but still staying active, I just imagine that his undercarriage is just built for war.
His legs have been fighting.
That is quite the imagination you've got there.
Have you seen those calves?
Yeah, the calves are legit.
They look like hydraulic pistons.
Yeah, his calves are, he's got mass in them.
Next level.
But I think his upper body is kind of atrophied in real life.
Definitely is.
Yeah, yeah.
Well, that's why he needed to do all that training.
Look, I just – I think he needs surgically implanted discipline.
I don't think that a fight, especially a fight 12 months from now,
is going to do anything to make wings actually move.
I think –
It's certainly not because he said no.
Wow, I didn't know that.
Okay, when I watched, he said, do I have to decide now that that was where it was when i left off when um i knew you
you knew but uh oh i lost derailed my train of thought he uh you said wings oh the survival trip
wings was all on board on the survival trip right and one of the reasons that he did so poorly on
the survival trip in the public eye is not that he bowed out if he had said man i wish i could go with you guys
but i'm a 400 some odd pound man and i'm not built for it you know i'd love to do it but
maybe someday we should do it next year like if that was where he was like lefty did lefty from
the beginning was like you know survival know, it's a rival trip.
Not my cup of tea.
You guys knock yourself out.
And Wings' reaction to that was, Lefty, you're a pussy.
You're such a pussy, Lefty.
A real man, like Woody, Kyle, and I, we're going to go out there in the woods.
All my friends are going to see my accomplishment, having survived off the land.
Lefty.
For two days.
You're a pussy, Leftyy lefty's such a pussy he said that a hundred times and he said he wasn't a real man a hundred more and then he backed out that's
what would happen if he agreed to fight keemstar well he would be in a lot of trouble he wasn't
gonna make 25 grand off the survival trip like no he wasn't he's got $25,000 off the survival trip. No, he wasn't.
He's got this pipe dream of getting his surgery done,
and this is enough to pay for the whole thing in the U.S.
He already has enough to pay for the thing in the U.S.
That's the thing.
People get so – see, the ignorance about this annoys me almost as much
as the ignorance about the gun show.
I'm annoyed by Taylor as well.
Not Taylor's ignorance.
Everyone's ignorant about this everyone's like
well this would give him enough money to get it done he's already got the money he's had the money
this is like that that gun show loophole bullshit it's like yeah if we could get rid of that gun
show loophole there isn't one you fools they're lying to you yeah like this is the same thing
because he's had the money to do it in the united states for weeks now weeks and
weeks he's had it and and plus don't forget this isn't like i was gonna say not like buying a car
but it's much like buying a car you can make payments on this thing right tell me if i'm
wrong because i might be one of those people that frustrate you he has the money perhaps to afford the surgery
but there's some wrap around costs right like he might be taxes which also can go on a payment plan
taxes are a good example i didn't think of that but i was more thinking of like you know he doesn't have any sick days so he needs enough cash to keep him afloat maybe he's unable to work for two weeks
or something he's not thinking about that.
He has other expenses.
He needs to have a little cushion.
He can't do a surgery for every dime he has and then he's okay.
You're making good points, but these aren't points that have actually held him back.
He certainly hasn't thought of any of these things.
And if he can't work for two weeks after that, how's he going to pop back on a Delta
flight 36 hours later?
He's not.
That's the most entertaining part of the equation, Taylor.
Yeah, that's not going to work.
He's going to do it in Conway.
So there's this weird thing going on, right?
And I'm almost hesitant to say this, but I just will.
Here's what's going on, all right?
Here's the nitty gritty, deep, dark, scary truth.
He can get that surgery done in Conwayitty, deep, dark, scary truth.
He can get that surgery done in Conway, South Carolina, and he can drive.
It's it's 30 minutes from his house or something like that. He can get that thing and be in his own bed and like 40 minutes or something
like that.
Yep.
Is this, do you know this for sure?
Or do you think, yes, I know this for sure.
Okay.
But he's the expense. The reason he's, he wants more and more money is he wants to get the surgery
Pay his trailer off and then transition into a new life and leave YouTube and twitch completely behind all in one shot
That's that's what he's trying to do here and he's being pushed to do this by his mother
You know, he kept saying in that Twitch chat, got to talk to mama,
got to talk to mama and, and Kitty jumps in there.
He's like, how old are you?
You're 31 years old.
He's 32 in like a month.
You got to talk to your mother.
Right.
Okay.
All right.
Got to talk to your mommy then.
It's just like his mom is pushing.
Yeah.
Yeah, absolutely.
His mom is pushing hard for him to do it in Mexico
because she wants a big chunk of his savings
to go into paying off the trailer,
which now here's the part where I'm guessing
I think his mom still owns the trailer.
You know, his mom has always owned the trailer.
Wings has already paid that trailer off once before
thinking that he owned it. And his mom's like, nah trailer. Wings has already paid that trailer off once before, thinking
that he owned it, and his mom's like,
nah, you don't own it. In fact, I'm gonna
take out a loan on the trailer, put you more in debt.
I got some stuff to buy.
I think his mom wants him to die in Mexico
with the trailer paid off.
It's what it
sounds like to me. I think she wants him to die
in Mexico, get that trailer paid off,
and walk away with a nice little chunk of Jordy Jordan's money.
But that's not a thing most moms target. That is macabre. Okay, so what do we know
about Wing's mom? Is she the kind of lady that might do that?
Yeah. Because you have to be a genuine,
to send your son to Mexico hoping he dies in a surgery.
Well, she's coming along, right? That's like movie level evil, you know?
I think this is a little far fetched.
She's going to be like, Dr. Garcia,
why don't we wait a few minutes while he's under?
We don't need to bring him back right away, do we?
I already tell you I am not the doctor.
Yes, you are, Dr. Garcia.
I work across the way at the taco truck.
I just sell sedatives.
Kyle, let me ask Taylor's question again.
What do we know about Wings Mom?
Because there are things that I don't know, that I might have wrong about Wings Mother that are serious allegations to the point where you don't make them when you're not sure.
I know what you're thinking right now.
Let me type it to you, and you tell me sure. I know what you're thinking right now.
Let me type it to you, and you tell me if this is exactly what you're thinking right now.
And I don't think this is true.
You think that that's the case?
That is only one of them. But yeah, that is
actually probably top on the list.
We have no evidence of that.
I don't believe that.
I think what Woody thinks is worse than what I think.
Taylor, you tell me.
What's worse?
What Woody thinks of her or what I think of her?
Oh, man.
These are two very similarly sized pillars of shit.
Okay.
In fairness, I didn't say the thing I think out loud.
What'd you say?
Has his mom ever been on a video?
Because I know it was only his grandma and then that other guy.
My lore of Wings of Redemption is so not up to snuff compared to you guys.
Ah, that's sad.
That was a question, though.
I'm not putting question marks on these, but these are all for Kyle.
On the list of what do we know about Wing's mom.
That's true. The last one's a true one.
Yeah, I would say so. We don't know
the exact details of that,
but he was raised by his grandmother, right?
And look,
the thing is, the mom is pushing for
Mexico, even though he has the money
for Conway, South Carolina, right?
Why? That's ridiculous, because, man, I really can't think of a reason Mexico, even though he has the money for Conway, South Carolina, right?
Why?
That's ridiculous because man, I really can't think of a reason why you would push for Mexico unless 30 minutes down the road, unless you
want more of his money to be invested in paying that trailer off again and
potentially being left over should he not make it.
But man, this is so convoluted.
I'm trying to, I don't think that your line of thinking is on target.
I just can't get my arms around the idea.
I know that the pieces fit, right?
Like, Hey, why don't we do a cheaper surgery? We'll have more money left over.
A cheaper, more dangerous surgery.
A cheaper, more – yeah, probably more dangerous.
Definitely more dangerous.
Yeah, it's – so I don't think of Mexico as quite the, like, 18th world country that you guys do.
Not that.
I could be wrong.
It's the travel.
Like, no doctor will tell you to take a cross-country flight
with your stomach stapled but what if the staples come come loose mid-flight and he bleeds out
internally yeah like that that's the risk it's not that the mexicans are going to mess it up
because i'm sure they do this all the time for people who live in san die just who just you know they walked across the rio grande just like did the cut be on my back
i feel one kidney ish do you feel one kidney
i've already lost about eight and a half pounds what did they cut out
uh yeah i i don't know i while all the pieces pieces fit, it's not a storyline that makes sense to me
because it's not what I know about moms.
Even my mom never wanted me to die
so she could get my money.
Well, maybe she doesn't know.
Have you told her how much you're worth?
She'd be like,
Woody, maybe you should go under the knife.
Yeah, get this fixed.
Get that fixed.
I have a doctor in Guatemala.
He's very good. No, no, no. Not in fixed. I have a doctor in Guatemala. He's very good.
No, no, no. Not in North Carolina. I've been watching your
paramotor videos and I think you're a bit of a
pussy.
Woody, why no 360s?
What a barrel roll.
Come on, do some loop-de-loops over a canyon.
Pussy.
Mom?
Don't make me get the ice scrapers hot.
Be a man. Please don't talk about ice scrapers.
I get a little PTSD around those.
I was at a store the other day and I saw, I like gathered up a handful of ice scrapers
and I was about to send a picture of myself like, why I ought to hold them up.
I wish you had.
I was like, ah, it's stupid.
Oh, no.
I would have liked that joke.
But back to wings. Yeah. Like, all right. So maybe I'm wrong about that. Maybe I'm at a left field.
I'm not trying to be mean about that. And I realize that's a sensitive issue. But that's
what Chiz and I both think in our private conversations. We think Wings' mom wants him
dead and she wants his money because I don't think she's ever had 25 grand to just clutch onto.
Everybody in that family seems to be kind of on disability or unemployment or something.
His brother is a crackhead who steals from everyone.
Is this confirmed? Which parts? The brother part. The part about the crackhead.
Absolutely. The source is wings in his videos.
I'm just doing my fact check. Is it crack or coke?
Well, he might dabble in coke, but that's expensive.
Okay.
Because I think he started with coke.
Does his brother live on Madison Avenue?
I don't get that reference.
I'm sorry.
It's an expensive place to live in New York City.
Yes.
I was going to say, because if not, it's probably crack.
Yeah.
It's crack.
Via wings. because if not, it's probably crack. Yeah. It's crack. Via Wings.
He said, quote,
my brother's a crackhead and he steals from me,
so we're not on good terms.
You know, you could interpret that in a lot of ways.
Yeah.
I'm reading between those lines.
There's a video where Wings is like,
you know,
my Xbox 360 was out in the shed and someone on stream offered me $400 for it.
And I was like, well, shit.
Yeah, you can have Wings Redemptions hallowed Xbox 360 for $400.
First to 10th prestige on YouTube.
Yeah.
Went out there to get it.
A lot of stuff missing.
I think that the story, his story is a little foggy, but I think all the peripherals are gone, right?
They've been pawned away.
Lots of stuff is getting taken and pawned away.
You hear about that all the time.
Someone's an addict.
They steal from their family members, and they pawn off little innocuous items
that might not be missed right away.
They don't take the TV right off the wall, but they'll go in the attic and get your extra computer monitor
or they'll go in a drawer and, you know,
steal your cash or jewelry that you don't wear regularly,
that sort of thing.
And that's what he's been doing.
That makes sense, actually.
I think that's a clever addict.
And when you were like, you hear about that all the time.
I'm like, what?
No, my shit doesn't just go missing all the time.
Well, it doesn't happen
there's a very sly crackhead that lives nearby he's like don't take too much i don't want to risk it yeah yeah yeah oh there's goto in here he hasn't touched that guitar in three years just go
missing from the attic and he won't notice for three more.
So what we do know is he could get the surgery in Conway right now and his mother's pushing
him to Mexico. Now, if Wings is listening to this, I would say do it in Conway. It's
not that Dr. Garcia is not a good doctor. It's that you'd like to be able to zoot home
right afterward and recover, right? Like not get to the airport and then sit there. Like
there's no doctor in the, even the Mexican doctors when you're like, yep, I got my flight
at 3.30, like 3.30 today? Oh no, that's not good. I do not recommend that.
I would recommend research. Research the travel thing wings i'm
still on your team with this thing if you're watching and i just have a feeling it's going
to get to him right anytime you say something about anyone on youtube there's a thousand guys
who are listening on their behalf you should know these things your mother's trying to kill you
i think he should research because sometimes i like when i decide to fly first class or coach right
it'll be like aha first class is whatever 1500 more over the course of five hours do i want to
earn 300 an hour to sit in coach and like that's the kind of equation that goes through my head
so wings can ask himself that flight home might be the most unpleasant day of your life.
And you might earn $9,000 to suffer through it.
Just find out if that's worth it to you.
You know, like Taylor,
let's say that you had a really unpleasant day.
Like it was a root canal that couldn't be fixed.
And it's, you know, whatever 10 is on your pain scale,
would you suffer for a 14 hour travel
ordeal for 10 grand uh maybe yeah but it's not the same as an invasive surgery like like me doing
something with my my tooth and like having to take a flight where i just suffer my ass off
on just a couple of painkillers like yeah, that would suck. But like if they cut into my stomach and they're like, hey, I could save nine grand if I just
fly back from Mexico, despite the fact that there's not a medical professional on the
planet who would recommend this.
Like I would.
There's no way I would do that.
Like you could literally die if something goes wrong up there.
Some pressure change, some some jostling of, you know, too much turbulence, like any
amount of things.
He could sit next to a asshole like me
who elbows for the armrest.
You could.
I could have a thing.
Okay, so I was on a private flight a couple years ago
and what I noticed was when we all had,
we had these bags of chips,
like the little individual serving bags of chips.
There were snacks provided for us in the back seat.
And when you get to altitude, they expand
because the air on the
outside is thinner and then the air that's contained on the inside so it's trying to
expand and and make that equilibrium that would happen to wings right he if he would be expanding
as he as he as he went to altitude larger and larger you're assuming that wings is airtight
i don't think wings is airtight right I don't think Wings is airtight, right?
I mean, you would hope his stomach cavity is.
Yeah, all of us are airtight.
Just hold your breath.
Well, no, but I mean, over the course of a flight,
I don't think people expand, do they?
I don't know.
I really don't think this is a thing.
No, of course it's not a thing.
You gain an inch of waist every... No, you know what you do?
What is horrible is when I've gone on business trips
where I have like the flu or a head cold,
like, you know, when you have like sinus congestion,
like your ears and everything,
you feel like your head's going to pop
when you're like taking off or landing
if you have a bad head thing because of the pressure.
Like it wasn't, I landed two Fridays ago.
It wasn't until three days ago
that I was talking to someone and I
felt like a and I was like oh I haven't able to hear on my left ear for like
weeks now like I just got used to it I have a link here from the Huffington
Post it says as a plane rises and the cabin pressure drops the gas and your
intestines expands your stomach might feel full or cramped think of that water
bottle that has
expanded and explodes a little when you try to open it mid-flight so if you have to get rid of
some gas just let it out oh man it just got a little bit worse argument wings his stomach has
never felt full it might after they like remove most of it right i know i know you know what so
actually as you guys say all this you're kind of winning me over.
This sounds like the pressure difference, especially with something like a digestive system that holds solids and gases and liquids and the whole nine yards, might be the kind of thing you don't fuck with on a flight shortly after a surgery.
Oh, absolutely.
Like it's a terrible idea. So he also said,
let's see, there was a lot said. He wants to transition into a new career,
right? And he mentioned utilizing his degree in metallurgy. He also said that it wasn't really
a degree because I think I've heard this part. Yeah. And he's like, well, not exactly a degree in metallurgy.
Which leads me to think, like, what is it?
Is it a certificate of metallurgy?
I think it's less than that.
I think he has experience in metallurgy.
I want to know more about that.
I really, really want to know more about that experience of metallurgy.
And he said something
about going into the emergency services field i i don't know what that even means um i could
mean like nine yeah 911 operator all the way to like paramedic because you know what though that
aligns with some previous dreams he used to want to be a fireman. That's the ultimate Wings of Redemption dream.
Fireman.
But I think he's kind of let that one
pass, right? Because he's a long
way from the physical requirements that
a rookie fireman would have to...
Now if he does this Keemstar boxing
match, then he's already halfway there.
Look, fireman is being his dream.
And he's got 25k to buy
his suit and his supplies.
He's dreamed of being a fireman for longer than I've known him.
And that dream hasn't motivated him to make any progress.
I'm just convinced in my heart of hearts and my soul of souls
that he needs what I'm calling surgical discipline.
Discipline surgically implanted.
There is no dream or no consequence
that will get him to cut back on sugars.
Okay, so then there's the nitty gritty details
about all this that make him look bad
when they get pulled out of him, right?
Like he's been talking about this for a long time,
but he hasn't got a surgery date.
He hasn't got a doctor's date to look at any of this stuff.
It seems that all he's really done is gotten online and looked up complications.
He's now he's talking about gallstones and how those frightened him.
Now he's talking about stuff like that, but then he added, I've
already bought the flights and remember.
I looked up the flight costs and they were $550, $600, something like that.
He's like, oh, no, no, no.
They were 400 bucks each.
And I was like, well, you got a good deal then.
But plausible.
But what day is the flight, Wings?
Since you haven't contacted the doctors, you haven't gotten your blood work done,
you haven't even decided yet,
but you've picked a flight date?
And then he's like, ah, you can move those days around.
I guess I don't get those kind of plane tickets when I fly.
Wings is, so that is a kind of plane ticket that exists.
You may know this.
You can buy plane tickets without dates.
Sometimes you do that
as a gift or something. Like, hey, Kyle, I got you and your sweetheart a trip to Africa.
You just tell Delta when you want to go and they'll lock it in for you.
Can I cash them in for money?
I don't know, actually. That's what I don't know.
Dark continent.
Well, come on. I want you know. Back onto the dark continent. Well, come on.
I want you to watch me land in Johannesburg.
You're never landing in Johannesburg.
I may have mixed your gift with my dreams.
I don't take you long before that.
But you can do that.
Those tickets are way more expensive.
Those flexible tickets.
The inexpensive one are locked in.
And that just ties into Wings has always been very bad at lying.
Right? locked in and that just ties into wings has always been very bad at lying right you know i i believe
wings has been caught in practically every lie he's told and uh i'm painting him out to be as
a serial liar when i feel like the current version of wings lies much less but he did lie right there
so um the mistake he's making is not fighting Keemstar in my, in my opinion,
because if I were in his shoes, I would use that as a motivation to get in
shape and lose the weight naturally.
I would be like, wow, that's a lot of money and forget about the 25,000.
Uh, think about all the money he'd make growing the channel, the big boost he'd
get when the fight did happen, but also the lead up to it over the the next year talking about it all the time. We'd be talking about it
We'd be like have you seen the new wings boxing vlog? Holy shit. He's down to 360 pounds
I wouldn't want to tangle with 360 pounds of wings. He probably just muscle you into the corner, right?
He'd cut you off. You might be in some trouble. Did you see him doing those agility exercises? Holy shit, he's quick on his feet
now. We'd be talking about it.
Keem would be talking
about it.
Keem's got, I don't remember
what his Twitter account is, but it's like
1.7 million or something.
That's a big Twitter account, and he's got a big following.
They'd be, everybody
would be talking about this shit.
It'd be big for the same reason There you go. It'd be a lot everybody be talking about this shit everybody it'd be it'd be big
for the same reason it'd be there you go it'd be big for the same reason mayweather fights are big
everybody wants to see mayweather get beaten up a lot of people would want to see keemstar get
beaten up oh they would get behind wings of redemption there are a lot of people want to
see wings get beaten up that too but one to see is the common denominator in both of these.
Yeah, yeah.
It would be a big fight.
It'd be bigger than any normal amateur boxing match.
There would be millions of people interested in this thing.
There would be well over $100,000 to be made on Wings' part,
not counting the channel rejuvenation,
what it would do for him physically, what it would do for him mentally
to gain those skills and to gain that confidence
and all the things that would come along with it.
If he dedicated himself to that, he would come out one year from today
at the St. Valentine's Day Massacre,
Wings of Redemption versus Keemstar.
You know, wherever they find it.
Dude, there is no chance.
What's going to happen is eight months from now, we're going to be like,
does he look lighter to you?
No.
I think he's bigger.
You know, it's hard to tell.
He's bigger at that thing.
It's like Keemstar looks lighter.
How mean do you think Keemstar is right because you just see you see keem like literally like you see keemstar's videos and he's over
there hitting like a half of beef just and every time he hits it like the bones crack a little
i don't know channel you have a wings channel and he's hitting the beef and then he gives up halfway through and starts gnawing at it there i don't really know what current keemstar
looks like he said if if he said he weighed 250 right which is is that did you hear that from him
yes yeah okay so current keemstar must be on the on the heavy on the chubby side right but i've
seen him on the chubby side and then like he and Blade got together and worked out, and Keemstar got a fit bit, and he made noticeable changes to his body.
I believe that if he had this thing to motivate him, he's already motivated.
The Keem actually would get into some kind of fighting shit.
And I think Wings actually wouldn't.
And I don't mean that as a mean thing.
actually wouldn't. And I don't mean that as a mean thing. I just, Wings has had every piece of non-surgical motivation over the last nine years that I've known him. And nothing's worked.
Nothing's worked. I agree with you 100%. I'm not saying, I'm telling you what Wings should do,
what I would do if I were Wings, what you would do if you were Wings. If you were given this
opportunity, I'm sure you'd jump at it, right if if keem was going to pay you 25 grand to fight him
in a year would you take that boom hey uh how does anyone else let's run it twice keem i'll let you
hang on me keem you can fight me for 50 grand twice in a day how does that sound think of the
savings but but yeah like the whole point like
put the name of anyone in the gaming community in there if there's a guy who's like like really
into wwe and he's gonna beat the shit out of me or something like 25k i'll i'll take a few i'll
take a few you know punches yeah now well by the way keem pay Wings. Keem, he set it up in such a way that he had to pay directly to the surgeons or something like that.
He said he'd do it either way.
Of course.
Oh, not in the, I didn't see the whole thing.
If you were going to actually do it, what would have to be done is a lawyer would have to be involved with an escrow account.
That money would have to be put in escrow.
And then the lawyer would facilitate the transaction so that if wings didn't go through
with this the lawyer's like well mr keem here's your money back the other side of this i'm thinking
about this deal what can't happen is have like keem own like whatever pay-per-view he'd end up
wrapping around this and earning 75 grand while i got 25 fuck that no no no i want 25 grand plus
the even split.
Yeah.
That's the thing.
He would have to give up the 25.
He would have to make less than 20, 25 grand less than I do out of this.
That's the scoop. Or maybe, yeah.
There'd be lots of ways to slice the pie.
No way he's going to make like a quarter million off pay-per-view,
give me 25 grand, and have me look like an ass.
Yeah.
It's not my first business deal either and
the other thing is you know everybody will be wearing headgear of course because it's a non-sanctioned
boxing match right it would be an mma match um boxing i think it was boxing well no it's not
not when i'm in it uh well i'm just talking about wings and uh yeah well kyle changed the topic to
me uh there's no way i'm gonna give give up my fucking years of grappling experience for this.
I'm not doing boxing.
So the answer is no, you would not box Keemstar for 25 years.
The answer is yes, I would fight him in an octagon.
No, but the question is would you box him?
I've changed the question.
Okay, Mr. Trump, what do you think about gun control?
Is the NRA with you, or are you prepared to go up against him?
People are scared of the NRA. Yeah, I don't know why they're scared of the NRA. All they
have to do is adopt all the same ideas. That is that.
All right, well, fair enough. In any case, he said no. He said on Twitter that
he's like, I don't want to fight anybody
you know i bet he's mulling over like i bet it's not a final no right it's a final no
i could totally tell when we jumped in that when i jumped in the call with him
because i even tried to give him that out because like me and jive turkey you seem like a really
nice guy i don't have a lot of interactions with jive but i enjoy talking to him i'm sure in his
history he's probably wrong somebody i don't know if he's attacked you or something.
But he seems very chill, very nice guy to me.
And I enjoyed speaking with him.
And Whiteboy was in there.
And Kitty jumped in there.
And we were all kind of talking to him
and joking about it a little bit.
And at one point, I could tell that he didn't want to do this.
You could just tell by his tone.
I was like, Wings, you know, there's a lot of people here and
It'd be good if you just went ahead and said, you know
If you don't want to do this just say it
Because we're all trying to find ways to make the puzzle pieces fit together for you so that you can do it
We're trying to show you the bright side of this
But if you're just adamantly opposed to this just just just let us know and then that thing
You know the conversation just got away from us at that point but I could tell he doesn't want fight anybody he
wants to he wants to get this weight loss surgery and and do whatever his mom
wants him to do and and and that's gonna be that hmm man huge missed opportunity
I'll get weight loss surgery if someone pays for it.
No, that would be a bad idea for you.
Why would you do that?
I don't know. I was fucking around.
Yeah, I'm still thinking about this because I'm sure Keisar's going to watch this. I wonder if he'll
accept this offer of doing a deal and
splitting it down the middle. No, he wouldn't want to fight you
in mixed martial arts because you have years of training.
I bet.
I don't know. I'm putting myself in his head and he's thinking that he doesn't respect it.
Well, how old is, uh, is he, uh, is he your age?
Is he younger?
He's younger than me, but he's older than people think he might be 37.
I'd call it, I guess 34, 35.
I don't, I don't really know.
It's like 10 years difference.
I remember seeing a clip once and I don't remember the context, whether it, I. I don't really know. It's like 10 years difference. I remember seeing a clip once, and I don't remember the context.
In my head, Keem was the good guy in this scenario.
But for some reason, he got into a physical altercation with a guy outside of, like, at nighttime outside of a gaming convention.
Do you remember this clip?
Oh, yeah, I know.
And there's some punches thrown, and, like, the other guy gets tossed to the ground.
And Keem looks very aggressive and,
and very physical in that clip.
I just,
the way I recall,
I remember Keem getting the best of this guy and this guy outweighing Keem,
but I don't remember either of them.
They both had like plumbers crack and,
and like,
it wasn't a good look.
I thought,
you know,
like in terms of grappling, I've got got the video if you want to watch it
uh
yeah I should be
it's not on anyone's channel really
it's on it's foobar
number one comment damn his butt
crack show
I hope wings reconsider
let's
just want to be
double sure I can show
this.
Like technically, you know,
it should all work. I set everything up.
Yeah, everything works. Are you ready?
Yes.
What are you going to do?
Dude, seriously.
Are you going to lie to me?
You remember Keen being the good guy?
I don't want to participate in the fight you know it looks like he's the aggressor here but what caused him to be the aggressor you know
like I think there was some back-and-forth trash talk prior to this
yeah you never know like like like have we started the video oh mine auto started
I'm at 20 seconds sorry I watched him throw the heavy guy on the ground.
Yeah.
King looks physical in it.
Like, I don't know how to better describe it.
Like, he looks like he needs good balance.
He didn't wear his fighting pants. No, bro. It was bullshit. No, come on. No, it was bullshit.
This is a community.
We need them.
No, it wouldn't happen.
No.
No, fuck this shit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit.
No, it's bullshit. No, it's bullshit Yeah, I'm watching Keeeman there. Take away the fact that he could be a few pounds lighter and such.
He got kind of an overhand grip on the top of the guy's shirt
and pulled him to the ground.
The grappling side of it looked really short, but really one-sided.
Yeah.
If he'd followed that up by getting on top of that guy,
he could have really punished him.
Yeah. Yeah, if he'd like followed that up by getting on top of that guy, he could have really punished him. Yeah, but I'm glad they kept it much classier than like a world star hip hop fight.
Those fights were like, they throw you on the ground and you like hit your head on the curb and you're like stunned.
And it's just some jackass world star.
And they're like him and his, you know, conga line of friends come over and just boot you right in the bridge of the nose over and over.
It's like this guy's probably dead.
Like, you genuinely might have killed this guy as they're, like, dancing around going world star.
World star.
It's, I don't know, anyone who's ever yelled world star in public, that's, like,
if I were the dictator, there would be Judge Dredd's, like, hidden all throughout,
and they would only come out when they heard world star and then
they'd go over there and they'd summarily execute everyone ever mockingly coming with me i've never
yelled world star and kicked someone in the back of the head well if they show up and it's like a
couple of girls you know with the hair pulling fight it's like all right all right but if there's
a girl on the ground getting her head stomped in then they're just gonna have to kill everyone
and the girl who got her head getting her head stomped in because she's clearly a bit of a ruffian
yeah she could be a victim sometimes the girl getting head stomped in can be the victim yeah
it can be a person who's like what no like i i i use mean words and yeah and they find themselves
in a mean actions uh that she found herself in.
I gave your husband syphilis, but that's no call to be attacking me.
I just got my hair done.
You're fucked.
You're about to get head stomped.
Worldstar.
Worldstar.
Worldstar.
I'd like to see it used in a conversation more instead of yelled out.
Worldstar.
And the fight begins.
See, I feel like Worldstar would be the perfect sponsor
for the Wings Keem fight, right?
Like, if you could get something like that on board,
fucking stream that shit on the Worldstar homepage,
like, there's so many, you can make so much money off this thing.
You're probably right.
Macabre Woody was going live leak on this thing.
Yeah, another reason why, if you're watching this,
Cain,
don't do it.
I was talking about him
in wings.
I feel like Woody's picturing
Mortal Kombat finishers
or something like that.
I'm not even 100% sure I'd win.
I tell you what, I'm 100% sure I'd win
if there was no striking.
Because what happens to people who don't know how to really grapple is they just don't have offensive moves and eventually will lose even if they get a good position um but when
they're striking if there's a good position they can do some damage but uh i like my odds i like
my odds i'm taller than keemstar is what if ke Keemstar said, oh, Woody, I'll do it, but it's got to be boxing.
It's not rolling around.
It's just boxing.
The trouble with that is I think I would lose.
Is Keemstar, is he a boxer?
No, but he's stronger than me.
He's like 50 pounds heavier than me.
I'm not, I don't know.
Yeah, but he'd cut all that weight.
You've got a year to get a boxing trainer we'll get you a Mickey
Oh you'd believe if
If there was a year I would definitely
Get some boxy training but so would he
How about six months
You think you could do it in six months
I don't think six months changes me
Into a better boxer than him
My stand up games just
He's done boxing before see that's the thing
I've done boxing before sure
and muay thai but i i think you put me in there against a guy who's stronger and i don't know
that i win right it's not i'm not special at boxing but in grappling yeah i really think it'd
be pretty lopsided even if he's stronger i mean i've handled guys much stronger than yeah keemstar
before that's why he'd never agree to do that though because you've done that for years and he hasn't
so it's the only thing i'd agree to because he wouldn't be 50 pounds heavier than you by the
time of the fight because he's going to be trying to like as if i'm interested in a fair fight no
i'm a millionaire that does not need 25 000 i will take candy from a baby, but I will not take a fair fight.
See, I thought that this was more
just you wanting to fight him.
I didn't even know money was on the table for this one.
I thought it was just a fight me at PAX kind of thing.
I would have to get the $25,000
and then half of whatever profits came from it.
Okay.
Guaranteed accounting.
Put it in the contract.
It's not my first contract.
See, I mean, I gotta say, I'd be more interested in watching him fight Wings.
Because part of the fun would be watching Wings' transformation over the course of the year.
Being like, holy shit, three months ago I was ready to put all my chips on the
Keemstar's gonna beat him handily square.
And now he's really kicked into
high gear and Wings is looking way better than like that's that would be the interesting part
how the bets would change as it went on if they fought today my money's on Keem a hundred thousand
percent yeah the only way that I put my money on Wings is a if Wings worked out seriously for a
year and trained with a professional I think he wins because he would get, if he trained
every day for a year, he would literally be down to 330 pounds. He would lose 120 pounds in a year,
no problem, training boxing every day. And he'd be gaining muscle too. He'd be a much fitter,
faster fighting machine and much wider, much taller, much more physical human being. And I feel like he could muscle Keemstar into the corner of a ring potentially.
And then he wouldn't need to be fast.
He would have him right.
Like it would be a freak fight to begin with because he's much bigger than he'd
outweigh his opponent by 130 pounds.
Right?
Like, like he could get Keem into a corner and really work on him.
I, my money would be on him.
right? Like he could get Keem into a corner and really work on him. My money would be on him. Or if Keem put on enough weights to match Wing's weight, like if he put on a backpack with 250
pounds in it to match Wing's weight of 450 pounds, then my money's on Wing's again. Because I'm
going to tell you, if i had to fight wings of redemption
with if you if you equalized our weight with backpacks of weight on me or like there are like
chest weights and leg weights like if you did your best to like goku style equalize our weights with
like weights all over me he beat my ass there's no way i could go any more than a few seconds with 300 pounds of weight on me
it just wouldn't i couldn't do it i'd be tuckered the fuck out there's no way he'd run circles or
like i know he's not an agile guy he'd run fucking circles around me with 300 pounds on my body
i don't know if i can stand you right yeah And even maybe you'd be able to stand from a chair, but could you walk?
I mean, like a farmer's walk with 150 pounds in each hand, right?
Just like imagine.
And you wouldn't be like balanced the way like a body is.
Yeah.
More so like you'd be like.
You'd slink.
But.
Like it would like slap, like move some.
And so you'd be like having to deal with like, or I guess fat does that too,
but not the same way a weight vest would. I feel like the meanest guy in the call because i keep circling
back to wings has never done anything in the almost 10 years that we've known him that would
imply he would get into fighting shape even a year from first time for everything he could be in worse
shape this is a lot of motivation though he i don't think he's ever had this like direct motivation of like look wings 12 months from now there's a 75 000 payday that's
coming through all right 75 000 fucking cash is coming to you like minimum from this thing we're
going to promote this thing this thing is going to be viewed here here and here we've got four
sponsors the you're gonna be wearing these fighting shorts, this fighting shirt,
your fucking gloves say this on them.
The ring says that on them.
We're selling tickets over at the amateur boxing rink in Minneapolis
or wherever we're fighting this thing.
This is going to be a big deal.
Everything is in order.
All you have to do, we've already paid the trainer in advance.
He's coming to your house every day.
He's picking you up.
He's taking you to the ring in Conway.
And he's not leaving without you.
And he's not bringing you back home until 5 p.m.
Let's go.
Like, if you could make that happen.
You put up a $75 gift card to Steak and Shake, and I'll fight Chiz in a month.
Now, you get me thinking here.
Woody, could we make some money
fighting Taylor and Chiz?
Because I'll tell you what,
if you offered Chiz $10,000
to get in shape in a year and fight Taylor,
he would latch on.
He would latch on the way I'm talking about
wings latching on. I disagree. I don't think Ch he would latch on he would latch on the way i'm talking about wings latching on i
disagree i don't think chis would latch chis likes money but i think i i don't i don't know what
chis's net worth is but i suspect it's much sweeter than we think it is i think 10 grand is
fuck all the chis i chis so i agree with everything you just said. She has had, she has plenty of money, but he always likes more.
He's a little G in him.
He ate him.
And he's always looking for that, that, that, that motivation.
He's he's always said that he's like, if somebody would just bet me, you know, X
amount of money to lose the way, that's all I'd need.
He's always trying to get people to bet him
that he can't lose the weight.
He's looking for an excuse to do these things.
I would immediately start training.
You would?
You're already training.
You're like, I would start training 10 months ago.
Get my cardio up. Dude, I haven't start training 10 months ago. Get my cardio up. I haven't really learned how to box.
Jesus is a lot bigger than you.
Jesus is a couple inches taller, but he also weighs Oh, he's got
a lot more. I'm more muscular than she is by a lot. Oh, yeah.
Yeah. But but he's got a higher potential.
That's true. That's true. He could he could. Well, I don't
know. It depends. I don't know. It depends.
I don't know what Chiz's skinny body would look like.
Oh, it'd be frightening.
No, Chiz could
definitely put up a fight
if he really put it in.
Like, put in the effort,
learned how to fight,
lost the weight,
didn't drink cake shakes.
I'll put in five grand.
What do you put in five grand?
Winner take all boxing match in eight months.
Why do I have to pay five grand?
No, no.
I'm at least as chewy as Chiz is, I think.
I think Chiz has three cars right now.
What was I going to say?
Smart financial decisions.
They're all inexpensive cars. And apparently he got fabulous deals on them but i've heard that too i i was just giving him shit
i know he's not stupid he's not um he's not very smart gonna say something oh oh i started my
fitness pal i think i'm on a five-day streak oh good for whatever that's worth. It has been- Have you been good about logging everything in the meals?
Like the oils, like all the, like every ingredient?
Because it's super easy to forget that.
Even butter put on the pan, you know, for cooking purposes.
Yeah, perfect.
Yeah, yeah.
So I've been really, I've been as good as possible.
Like today's a good example.
I flew whatever, as far as I could go.
And then I landed and i took the airplanes have
airports have courtesy cars did you know there was this whole like like you can just show up to a
fucking airport and they give you a car even at a flying backpack so we took the car and we got
lunch and where i'm headed to with this is i just had to guess i got a tuna melt so i just picked
the like most sinful tuna melt on the list and assumed it was close to what I ate.
Because, I don't know, it's like non-chain food tuna melt.
But I log everything I eat.
I do it as honestly as possible.
And what's amazing about MyFitnessPal is the education you get from it.
I have mentioned my trail mix as my weakness before.
I did not know what I was doing to me. I't know how caloric the trail mix is yeah oh yeah peanuts almonds all that shit
packed with calories whoa like i'll have a bowl of fruit in the morning for breakfast that i think
is maybe pushing it a little you know know, and it's just fruit, you know,
blueberries, strawberries, clementine, banana. And, uh, and I look at it all and I'm like, you know,
like I said, when I picked the individual ingredients, I didn't know it was going to be a
whole bowl and the, you add it all up there and whatever. And it's like 280 calories or something
like it's, it's reasonable breakfast. And then 280 calories in trail mix form is like
putting trail mix on the bottom of a bowl and not having them stack on top of each other
yeah it's like laying them down like a ceramic tile in a bathroom yeah a single layer of trail
mix in a bowl is like maybe double layer is 280 i just the i what i would take as a healthy snack like
a non-sinful thing i was like having a hard time to make a dinner would be like a fist full of
almonds i did not realize i was having like 300 calories to hold me over to a 480 calorie dinner
and uh you know i like peanuts more than trail mix like the redskin Spanish
peanuts I eat those all the time but I'll have like like I have a measuring
my measuring cups over there quarter cup that's 170 calories of it and if I want
a little more than that I'll take a half of a quarter cup for like another you
know 85 calories or whatever it is and like when I first started doing that I'd
be like oh quarter cup of peanuts that sounds like a good is and like when I first started doing that I'd be like
oh quarter cup of peanuts that sounds like a good bit and like you put it in a
little bowl and you're like this is like no peanuts two dozen like it really is
it's hardly anything but like nuts and seeds are the easiest thing to eat
because they are good for you but just like they're much more
difficult yeah dude i as vegetables you can eat as much as you want like i'm about to make uh
burgers after this for myself with low calorie buns lean ground beef and spinach and tomatoes
and all the shit that you put on burgers and a side of a giant bowl of salad. And that's only like altogether, like 600 calories.
That's my big meal for the day.
Like the rest.
So one of the things I eat that Jackie makes has like two tablespoons of
butter or something like a lot of butter.
And she starts adding up all the ingredients and it's like, you know,
a cup of snap peas, four ounces of chicken and this and that
and you're all like this isn't bad and you're like holy smokes the butter is as much as this entire
recipe it's a big deal and so what my fitness pal gets you is the eye opening of experience
where your calories are coming from i i i thought i knew and i knew that trail mix was bad, but I didn't understand the ratios.
I had underestimated it severely.
And also, I didn't know this,
but you just keep your phone in your pocket,
and it tracks your steps,
and those steps are worth calories.
And so for me, a pretty active day might buy me 200 more calories,
and an inactive day will buy me like 60 more.
But I'm very anally following my fitness pal. I like take precautions to make
it harder on myself. So like I'll set the calorie counter like 100 lower than what it
says. I say that I live a completely sedentary life which isn't true. And so then that makes
it so it doesn't go as low. uh i always weigh on the side of like
being liberal with the amount of um like olive oil or butter or whatever i don't even i haven't
bought butter in fucking eight months like i only use olive oil to cook for the most part
i don't know if that actually helps that much but i guess it's a little lower calorie and it's a
it's got better fats in it for you but yeah i'm i like when i get when i feel like i have momentum you know like like you're on
a you know week or two kick and it was so fucking aggravating being sick so much recently it was
only like i guess yesterday that i was able to start working out again after almost two weeks
of not doing it and i am so much sorer today than I was before like I can feel
myself getting back into it I worked out it usually my workout because I was
doing the site I haven't mixed it up in like a month or like six weeks and it
usually would take me before I got sick about 60 65 minutes to get through the
whole thing if I'm going like hard the whole time it took me
an hour and 40 minutes hour and 45 minutes yesterday because like I would like go back
oh yeah like I'd be going back to like you know do pressing or we're doing whatever and I'm like
ah like I'm just getting fucking fatigued did you lower your weights and no I didn't want to lower
my weights or change the reps or anything because I was like, I'm not going to go backwards. There's no way I'm going backwards.
I actually added another exercise because I figured, well, no better time than now.
This is going to suck anyway.
So maybe that's not a good way to recover.
So I'm five weeks into weightlifting now.
I'm exaggerating.
This is my fifth week of weightlifting.
I haven't missed a day.
And I've been dieting well now for a week-ish.
And I don't know.
I just feel good.
I did the, not sedentary, but the one lightly active or something like that
because I thought it was accurate.
But I always finish with lots of calories, like 600 calories.
My first day, and like I said, I'm honest with it.
It was like, you did not eat
enough this isn't a healthy level of food but mostly it says like hey you'll weigh this much
in five weeks i'm like oh i would love to weigh that much in five weeks so we'll see yeah that's
a motivating thing and i like when you put something in there that's like clearly bad for
you but like the algorithm in the app like i'll put like red robin whiskey river barbecue cheese
burger with onion straws and it's like this food is high in protein i'm like yes it is app
oh i it it knocked me today what did it say you shouldn't have that much sodium and i'm like don't
berate me free app one time when i when i added almonds towards the end of the day it said that uh it was my diet was too high in fats and oh it's not saying it but when i had
the tuna melt it said it was high in something i didn't want i don't remember i thought it would
be right yeah but i'm like 1100 calories left today oh yeah All I've had today so far is a
double protein shake.
And so I'm about to feast
after this.
I don't know.
Whatever.
I like to finish
way under the calorie goal,
but I don't like it when it tells me
you're unhealthily not eating.
Because I am trying to
sculpt a little bit, you know?
Like, you're lifting weights.
You're trying to get...
They legally have to tell you, like, because of the app.
Like, if you eat under 1,200 calories, it has to say, this isn't healthy.
Is that the number?
Yeah.
It's like, no shit, retard.
Like, you...
Of course.
I'm not going to eat like this forever.
Like... Yeah. I'm not going to eat like this forever.
Yeah, I just, I gained a few pounds back.
And I hate that that is true, but it is.
And I think I can reach a new low in March.
And that's the objective.
That's good.
Yeah, so that's what we're doing. I'm glad we're all on it.
I know Kyle's still doing his diet.
Are you, Kyle?
Are you, Kyle?
Are you still dieting?
I lost about five or six pounds.
And so I've cut back from my spinach and grilled chicken and tuna thing to just one meal a
day.
So today I went to KFC.
Good stuff.
They had these new Reba McEntire is the new Colonel, by the way. I'm sure you guys don't follow the KFC marketing
program, but they bring in a new colonel every six months or so.
And it's Reba McEntire now.
Does she dress like the colonel? She looks a lot like the colonel. And she sings a little at the end.
It's finger licking good. It's great. She's got
the beard, the whole thing. She looks like the Colonel and and
they've got three different kinds of chicken tenders. They've
got the Georgia gold. They've got some sort of. I don't
remember the others, but they have like a honey mustard
chicken tender and they have a spicy chicken tender and it
comes with three chicken tenders covered in some sort of sauce
with a biscuit and aside. And so I got two of those meals. So it's six chicken tenders, mashed potatoes and gravy, potato wedges, two
biscuits, two apple pies, and a large Dr.
Pepper.
So that, that was all I've eaten today.
And that's all I'm going to eat today.
Um, and that's, that works out.
It might not be, I look at my days and I'm like, this is a game day.
This is a loss day and they sound backwards, but the loss is the good one.
And, uh, you might have a lost day if that's all you eat.
Yeah, I probably so I mean, I don't have a large Dr. Pepper
diet pepper, a large Dr. Pepper, I wanted it for some
reason my head I was like, that's what that's what a
compliment this meal the best. How do you All right, so you
are I already looked it up. I put calories in large Dr. Pepper KFC
and then calories in three spicy chicken tenders.
Doubled that.
So you're at about a little over 1,100 calories just with that.
But you had a side as well, didn't you?
I had mashed potatoes and gravy and potato wedges.
A large mashed potato? No, like the side order. I had mashed potatoes and gravy and potato wedges.
A large mashed potato? No, like the side order.
OK, well, it's certainly, OK, a side only 120,
but the gravy's more.
It's probably like 160.
And then you had what kind of potato wedges?
What side? Side of potato wedge is the smallest amount. There really weren't what kind of potato wedges? What size?
Side of potato wedges, the smallest amount.
There really weren't a lot of potato wedges in there,
and they weren't very beefy potatoes.
You only added 40 for the gravy?
That can't be true.
It's a very small amount of gravy.
About 300 for the wedges.
So you're like 1,600 calories for that meal?
The two apple pies.
No, you didn't have two apple pies all right the two apple pies are you no you didn't have two
apple pies i had two apple pies they were two for a dollar 60 how could i say no actually okay well
then this isn't a losing day for you you ate 2100 calories in one meal at kfc ish the calories were
81 so you're actually pretty close with 60 yeah Yeah. Yeah, it's like 20. God, those 500 calories in apple pie.
You know, I had already purchased everything.
She was handing me the bag back,
but I could see stuck to the building,
there was a billboard that said two apple pies for $1.60,
and I was like, I want two apple pies.
You almost have to buy it.
I don't want to lose money on that.
I don't want to lose money on it.
And honestly, it's funny, though.
That is the kind of thing that logging my diet opens my eyes to.
I would not have guessed that two apple pies were about as much as everything else combined, including the sodas.
Really, were they?
Because they were like this big.
It's 1,100 versus 1,000, right?
No, the two apple pies are 500 total. The bulk of it was your wedges, your mashed potatoes,
and then all your strips. That got you to like 1,500 on its own, or 1,400 on its own. And the
next time just spring for the diet, Dr. Pepper, and save yourself 350 calories. You know, I wanted to, but I felt like if I said it, she was going to laugh.
Because I only got one.
When I ordered the second meal, she's like, do you need a drink with that one?
I was like, no.
If you were fat, then she would laugh.
But because you're not fat, you could get away with it.
As a rule of thumb, I would guess Kyle burns about 2,100 calories a day it's just ballpark yeah you're that kind of
thing around maybe a little higher until recently mine's at 2090 so i just gave him 10 i don't know
why um my sex is extra vigorous now could you bump me up to 22 50 counts yeah you're making a lot of
sense to me i'll approve it so a lot of ice water ice water. I think the ice water, I'm on to something there. The colder the water you drink,
the more calories it burns because your body has to maintain its body temperature. So,
if you're putting ice water in, it has to do work to heat your body back up to 98.6.
I've had it related to me. Yeah, but that's literally what calories are,
is the amount of energy it takes to heat one cubic centimeter of water.
I think Kyle's right if it's cold out, right?
But if it's hot out, then your body works to cool by perspiring
and doing whatever it does.
So warm fluids, like warm water for example,
might cause your body to work extra hard to get itself cooled down.
I'm not buying that one because I don't think sweating burns calories.
It loses heat on its own. Yeah, I don't know. But like the whole cold water thing,
that's true, but I've also looked up that it's like an infinitesimal difference.
See, I add ice humans to mine.
If you sleep without a blanket in the cold, you'll burn way more calories than whatever,
you know, temperature beverage you chew. Shivering all night, you're telling me, in the cold you'll burn way more calories than whatever you know temperature beverage shivering all night you're telling me is the way to go i know or just did
that spring for the giant soda i gave you that option there was there's a a girl who was a swim
coach and she basically shivered for the first four hours a day you know like being wet and
instructed it was like at a lake they did their swim practice.
And she's like, oh, yeah, I always get super thin,
just shivering, telling the kids to do their thing.
Jesus Christ.
That sounds torturous, but effective.
She'd be in and out demonstrating how to swim properly.
She was very good.
And yeah, it just froze her.
So did you watch the new Walking Dead?
Oh, I didn't know it was out.
Fuck.
No. We're over an hour, by the way.
Hour 15.
You guys in the car to show?
I gotta go make my food?
Yeah, I guess so.
I could go all night. I don't know how you guys are thinking.
Okay!
I guess we'll cover
Walking Dead on PKA.
Make sure you watch it.
It came back, so we find out what happens with Carl.
And they get that all wrapped up.
Pins and needles.
All right.
PKN episode 184.