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pkn 268 return of kyle hello hello hello yeah you're already looking looking back to true form
you know feeling it's good to be back home so it's just getting just sleeping all night long
instead of instead of 45 minutes at a time also you get the added benefit of you get out
and your braves are doing better than ever. Oh, well,
I don't know.
We're going to game five.
We'll see.
Well,
we're going to find out one more to go.
I think it doesn't matter though.
We're not getting past the Dodgers.
I'm glad you said that.
Cause that ties into what I didn't say.
Braves fans are a little like St.
Louis blues fans.
They've been burnt so many times.
They're like,
yeah,
it's just a matter of time before we fail.
Like,
so there's,
I would love if I... I wouldn't say
this to any of my St. Louis friends, but
I would love if the Braves powered
through, beat the Dodgers, and won it,
and then we both got a nice little championship
surprise. Yeah.
You know, there are
sports fans out there, like the
Buffalo Bills come to mind, who are just
perennial losers.
Yeah. And they're like, like oh you poor Braves fans you
only won 15 division titles in a row but but it's like all right well that's what we're accustomed
to you know and and after a while that's just not that doesn't cut it anymore it's just like with
the Georgia Bulldogs with college football we're a top five team in the country every single year. That's not good enough anymore. You're going to have to win one.
Especially with Alabama right there. Right next fucking door.
Like four hours apart as the car drives.
And Florida teams win championships now and then as the car drives.
I never heard that expression before, but I think I might use it.
I just coined it.
That's a good possible meme format on my blog.
Good idea.
You know, I get it that some people have so little,
but that doesn't mean that I have to adjust my expectations
for my sports team to your level of loserdom.
You mentioned Buffalo.
They lost four Super Bowls in a row.
I doubt they were like, you know what?
Another second place. At least we made
it, bros. Four seconds equals a
first. When the Falcons
lost to the Patriots like three years ago, do you think
any of us were like, well, second place
is pretty good, boys. And hey, it's Tom Brady.
No, we were like, well, we're losers.
We're losers. When the Eagles
won the Super Bowl, we were like, well, we're losers. We're losers. When the Eagles won the Super Bowl, we were quite
pleased.
That was a brutal game. That was hard to
watch. Lozon
is fighting. You told me that, Woody,
and then only today did it. I've had a lot
going on, but only today was I like,
Joe's fighting. When and where? I
looked it up. I saw he's fighting in Boston
and he's fighting this gentleman who's 7-3
and I'm excited to see it. I think he's's gonna be at espn six or something like that i'll
find it one way i have espn plus i think you'd might too because you needed to buy usc fights
and i i've been able to watch all the fight nights there i'm a little confused where to
find fights nowadays they're so scattered about but so i go to um like like i watched the
card this weekend um i watched all of it yes and i went first i started on sling tv where i have espn
i think and i watched um the prelims and all that shit there and then i switched over obviously to
the pay-per-view and gave them my 60 even though they didn't deserve it uh and yeah it was it was
pretty weak card i mean
there were good fights don't get me wrong and i like that like like there's three different kinds
of cards in my opinion that well i guess four there's the super card that underperformed there's
one and a lot of a lot that goes to a lot of decisions maybe maybe you're the big stars you
can tell both of them neither one want to lose and so they prance around there's the mega card
that pays off mcgregor's had several of them.
When he KOs fucking Aldo in 15 seconds,
you're like, I got my money's worth.
And then there's cards that are like,
you're like, I'm not giving you my money.
I'm going to steal this.
And then you watch and you're like,
holy fucking shit, I should have just paid.
This was incredibly, they all overperformed.
They bled for nothing
because I didn't give them anything.
And then of course there's the card that looks like shit and performs like shit.
And this recent one was somewhere in the middle.
I don't know.
It's very difficult to predict which card is which ahead of time, too.
There are cards that just look like garbage.
And then every one of them is just a masterful matchup.
There are matchups where you're like, there can be nothing but fireworks out of this.
And then they're not. They're very timid, like you said hey did you see 245 the lineup for that
you might be out of i haven't but it is it the uh nate diaz card no it has so nate diaz is
headlining his card it's in new york so there'll be no championships on that because they wouldn't
put a championship over like a bm it's weird they don't know what to do yeah but 245 has
three belts on the line which is about as good as it gets um read them off for me if you have
it handy i actually do so um well one is holloway versus alexander volski. Okay, that's one, four, five.
The other... One, four, five?
Featherweight.
Oh, okay, yeah, yeah.
The other's Amanda Nunes versus Jermaine D. Randamy.
Oh, get fucked, Arandamy.
I hope she fucking destroys you.
And the third one's not on here.
Oh, women's...
Jessica I.
She's not a champ, is she?
Am I mistaken? No, how could she be? Because she's not a champ, is she? Am I mistaken?
How could she be?
There's only three divisions of women, right?
45, 35.
No, there's four divisions.
But she's not a champ, is she?
I think that...
There's like the Rose nominee.
I don't even know who beat Rose.
I remember her losing,
but I've stricken that from my memory.
The person who beat Rose has lost.
And now there's a Chinese champion.
That chick won!
Good. Good. Good.
Rose will destroy the Chinese chick.
I hope Rose comes back.
Rose was so technical in that loss.
Is she the one that's not ugly?
Yeah. She's one of the ones.
There's a lot of pretty roses.
Who's the lumpy one?
Are you thinking of Cyborg, maybe? Yep. There's a lot of pretty roses. Who's the lumpy one? Who's the... Oh, are you thinking of Cyborg, maybe?
Yep.
That's the only word you needed.
Lumpy.
Yeah, Rose is really pretty, but she shaves her head.
So she's almost one of those pretty in spite of how she looks women.
In the same way that Natalie Portman looked good in V for Vendetta.
Yeah, sure.
That's what Rose pulls off.
So what's the third belt?
Women shaving their heads.
It's not on here.
Now I'm wondering if I believed a rumor or if the other one's not locked in.
Okay.
Well, I'm still psyched for those two fights.
I think it's Usman versus Colby Covington.
Ah, been waiting.
Wow, Colby hasn't fought in a little bit.
Yeah.
At least I haven't seen him fight.
I haven't seen anybody fight in a little bit.
I think he did fight recently.
He won, didn't he?
He fought. He did. He set a record for
the amount of punches landed.
But it also went all five
rounds and they're calling him kind of a pillow hands.
So make your own mind up.
Pillow hands.
My man got pillow hands.
If you set a record for the number of strikes
landed and you don't finish the fight, is that awesome or i i don't know i hate durandamy with such a such a passion i
i can't wait to see a man in nunez punisher dude when people misbehave i often want to give them
championship opportunities like oh did you pretend to go for a glove touch then then hit him we'll
let him fight john jones yeah you know i want to feed him
to the baddest motherfucker i can think of did someone do that it's been done but that example
was just hypothetical for my yeah yeah but things hitting after the bell is what durandamy did to
holly home a couple years ago twice two rounds in a row and those were the most significant blows
one of them in particular was the most significant blow of the entire fight and i have despised a random me ever since then and she was not
apologetic immediately after or post fight she like stuck her tongue out was like yes i fucked up
like that and it's like she's a big goofy ugly man woman too so like and i'm in a new
you just see pictures ew yeah she Ew! She's one of those
Denmarkians or something like that.
Where's she from?
Oh, I don't know.
She's from the Netherlands.
I was about to say, she's from that land of
locks and bridges or whatever.
Yeah, locks and bridges.
It says she's from a town called
Utrecht, which is
where someone who looks like this should be from.
Yes.
The troll of Utrecht.
I think you're going to get what you want, Kyle.
If you fight Amanda Nunes, you're going to have a bad time.
How can you tell if this bitch has taken a bad face shot?
Right?
It helps with the scorecards.
That's a perfect defense.
Oh, my God.
Duran to be looking symmetrical all of a sudden.
Duran to me's looking rough.
I don't know what happened prior to this walkout.
Man, after that kick, she's looking like a six, six and a half out of ten.
That's right, Joe.
I don't know, she got punched in the face, back down to three.
That's right, Joe.
Genetics are a bitch.
Fuck her.
Fuck her.
I hope it's bad for her.
So yeah, just a little bit going on in
the sports world i guess also i saw um a little bit some stuff going on with the the shot so
those protests that are going on in um bangkok or hong kong maybe but i'm hong kong sorry um
yeah they uh i guess blizzard fired at one of those e-gamers one of the one of the big pros
for hearthstone or something like blizzard it it Blizzard? It's the World of Warcraft
people. Is that Blizzard? That's Blizzard, yeah.
Because he spoke out in
support for the protesters.
And then I also saw where
people were giving the NBA a hard time.
I feel like on the Blizzard part,
they also fired
the commentator broadcaster
who was maybe holding the mic.
And they fired him too. And these are all chinese guys i assume right i think you're getting i think what's happening
is there's a trend to kyle mentioned the nba and blizzard that they're choosing money over freedom
or like money over morals and uh and freedom of speech so there was a i think a gm from a basketball team i don't
remember oh yeah it's uh it's steve kerr it's not either of them mark mark cuban spoke out and he
oh did he yeah okay the guy i'm thinking of is less famous than mark cuban and um and he spoke
out and the nba at first it was like man they're choosing money over morals and then the nba said hey we're not
going to police what our what our players and what our management think from all these teams
their speech is free and then china did they shut down all the games did china reacted to it they
take everyone off tv i think that's what they did i read something about it that they like
like china's gonna end up getting their way they they guaranteed they will but steve kerr who's like always he's uh he's being political
all the time like trump will tweet and he'll be like this fucking guy and like all that and then
like they're like so he's a coach of some team like what do you think about uh what do you think
about china and all this and he's just like not not much.
That's what Steve Kerr said?
He just super tight-lipped, didn't want to say a thing about it.
I like the food.
Yeah, I like the food, and I want to be friends with all of them.
You know, I see it as two billion more friends, give or take.
So the NBA said the NBA will not put itself in a position of regulating what players, employees, and team owners say or will not say.
We can't operate that way.
So the NBA had kind of a pro free speech stance on it.
It's more a PR covering your ass kind of thing.
Because Garen fucking T, they're having their meetings and saying this kind of thing is not – you can't say this.
You can't rip on China.
You can't do this.
You can't do that.
kind of thing is not you can't say this you can't rip on china you can't do this you can't do that and then out in public we're going to get ahead of this by you know putting out a generic brand
statement that that kind of protects our brand a little bit and here's like i want to get this out
um cctv which i guess is chinese chinese tv announced that they will suspend
that they'll say chinese chinese tv it's just a photo of a man standing still behind
a register at 7-Eleven.
They're going to suspend all NBA broadcasts in response to Adam Silver's support for Daryl Morey.
Daryl Morey is the guy I couldn't think of, the GM, who said something bad about China.
Or maybe something good about Hong Kong.
If that's the guy I'm thinking of, he looks like a vampire.
He's got real vampire vibes.
Oh, yeah.
That's the guy.
That's the guy.
This is like the totally hairless head, the big ears. He's got like the vibes. Oh, yeah. That's the guy. That's the guy. This is like the totally hairless head, the big ears.
He's got like the Nosferatu skull shape.
1800 years old, maybe, but holding up really well.
Oh, if you're okay with switching gears, I wanted to talk about that.
So I talked about reading 11-22-63, the Stephen King novel about time travel. Yeah, I'm going to start that tonight.
I started it, and it's pretty fucking good.
They get away from what happens in the novel
just a bit, but they're getting the main strokes.
It's fun. It's a fun watch. I think there's maybe
8, 10 episodes, but episode 1?
Hour and 20 minutes.
It doesn't fuck around.
This isn't a TV show. This is like a miniseries.
Yeah, this is getting done.
You're getting to the end of this season.
That's like the perfect happy medium between a TV show and a movie.
I love miniseries.
Me too.
It's so dense with content usually, but there's also like you don't have to watch for seven years.
You get the HBO budget and the movie-like quality for everything, but you also get the episodic nature of television.
It's the best of both worlds.
It's wonderful. Speaking of which, have you tried the Gemstone show yet, or are you
still catching up on everything else? I don't know what that
is. The Righteous Gemstones on the HBO
one with John Goodman. Oh, yeah,
I put that on my watch list. Yes, yes, yes.
Yeah, you'll like that. Speaking of
entertainment, have you guys seen
the Joker movie yet?
No. I'm going to go watch that too.
One day this week. I thought my mom was going to be able to come
visit me, but she got very sick. She's got strep throat,
so she can't come out.
Dad came over this weekend. I guess they're not talking again.
Of course not. She has strep throat.
Two months in prison.
What could happen?
They had some kind of a falling out while
I was away.
They were at least getting along well enough that they would come over here and you know they were yeah you had some uh dinner like you cooked for them a couple times yeah yeah we
had several dinners over at my house they'd come over i'd cook a fancy meal and uh and everything
was all hunky-dory as they say say. But not currently, no. Apparently not.
They're getting shared custody, so different weekends.
For you.
Of me.
Of my 32-year-old son.
33, yeah.
That's awesome.
You guys, before the show on Thursday, you guys should both
see the Joker movie, or just
Joker, and so we can chit-chat about it. Because you know that I'm not... on Thursday, you guys should both see the Joker movie or just Joker and
so we can chit chat about it because
you know that I'm not, I do not
go to movies often. I'm usually not into
superhero movies. This is not your universe.
No, not at all. I do
like the Batman universe more because it's
more just like
they seem like most of them are just like regular, just
deranged guys or guys with a lot of money.
I know there are also superheroes.
See, I don't even know enough.
I'm already out of my depth.
Okay. With one sentence into talking about the DC universe.
But Joker hooked you.
But Joker was really fucking good.
Part of it was all the media freaking out, being like, I hope nobody shoots up the Joker movie.
Because if someone were to shoot up the Jokeroker movie it would be terrible man and then like
you'll see like nobody organically is talking about doing this but it's like cnn and washpo
and these like it's the stupid shit where like mainstream media will be like like one person
will take a tide pod and then they amplify it and then it becomes a thing and then they look at
their own reaction causing something
and go, the newest craze, snorting
condoms.
Now, only one man had done it in
Southern Utah until we put him on the news.
Now, it's all over
the place, but the way they were
the mainstream media was spazzing out about it.
This is so dangerous. This is terrible.
I'm like, man, if all these mainstream media was spazzing out about it like this is oh it's so dangerous this is terrible i'm like man if like all these mainstream media outlets i fucking hate hate this movie
i'll probably like this movie so i went and saw it and i won't spoil anything but i thought it
was the best movie i've seen in a long long time joe rogan called it a masterpiece repeatedly it's
so so fucking good it's a it's the kind of movie I like. It had the same kind of pacing as No Country for Old Men.
Very slow burn.
It gets really deep inside you.
You're marinating in the feeling and the emotions of it the whole time.
And Joaquin Phoenix, unbelievable.
He really makes you feel for him, even though he's this fucked up guy.
And even sitting there with my girlfriend, we were both watching it
maybe like 20 minutes into the movie
we're just like, oh
poor guy
oh, my heart's
breaking for this poor Joaquin Phoenix and he's
slaying it every step of the way
if I had to guess your guys take
Kyle's going to absolutely love it and what do you might
think it's too slow because it's definitely a slower pace like it is nothing like marvel
movies every once in a while i enjoy a slow burn kyle recommended one for me i'm gonna get close
on the name like bone bone tomahawk bone tomahawk that movie was sick too yeah i enjoyed that watch list and it was a slow burn
um yeah but oftentimes if you've got good comp so i love dialogue but it's got to be good dialogue
and like i i feel like tarantino has that down pat but i really like like old-timey western guy
dialogue like when they're just shooting the shit around a campfire or something like that
if it's meaningful yeah and like they say some cool shit like i don't know when if
clint eastwood's sitting there with morgan freeman and he's like remember that drover i shot through
the mouth his teeth coming out the back of his head and morgan freeman's like yeah and you're
thinking like i was fucked clint eastwood was just like he didn't do nothing to deserve that at least nothing
like i remembered once i'd sobered up you're just like oh that's western slow talk that even before
you described the scene it was like there's a gritty toughness tough guy but not posturing
tough guy like mafia tough guy yeah just like an underlying kind of like
a casual toughness yeah i don't know a natural tough it's right there ready to explode anytime
you need to draw upon it but it's not a bird with its wings out prancing for a mate it's the
opposite of that yeah yeah i i i understand you 100 yeah i
like that stuff uh that's i love westerns i've got a few westerns on my uh my watch list that
i want to want to pick up this week i haven't seen westerns too i want to watch more well
you'll like the joker dialogue because it's yeah pretty solid yeah i'm i'm definitely going to
watch it um i wanted to see i believe it it's Ad Estrata, the Brad Pitt movie
where he goes to space.
Chiz was telling me that it had
poor...
I think it's poor
critical reviews maybe or maybe it's poor
fan reviews, audience reviews.
One was high and one was low.
I'm not sure what to take from that.
I think that he said it had high
critical reviews because maybe it's a bit
more artsy than the fans were hoping
it would be. Always trust the audience review.
I'm with Kyle on this.
I find the critical reviews
are a little more artsy.
What someone
educated in film would like.
The fan reviews
are like
they would reward the popcorn factory a little bit more
there are films that i that i do enjoy that have really poor ratings um you know we've talked about
them on here things like pandorum and uh event horizon and stuff like that but but you know you
know sometimes i agree with them sometimes i don't you know toy story will have like a one a solid
100 and like i get it it's it's a good movie but it's it doesn't have
the same entertainment value as i'm sure joker is going to have i'm just i'm i'm not hyped for
toy story 4 which story 3 was really good though i've seen it it was good i've seen them all
i saw a movie last night that i missed expectation spider-man far from home
right i like this kind of movie i the marvel movies are some of my favorite movies that
came out recently and i saw this and i don't want to spoil it for a lot of people but the bad guy
missed expectations for me the fight scenes missed expectations for me even spider-man sort of he
has like a charm uh was missing for me all over the place like i i don't want to say i hated it you know
is he pretty bummed out about tony stark dying is that still like an under current or an under uh
that exists but it's not the part that drawed it down for me i i just felt like he didn't deliver
on his sort of like oh i can't believe this has happened to me kind of charm and uh and also the
the bad guy was the opposite i saw 30 seconds i like of the preview and i know also the bad guy was the opposite.
I saw 30 seconds of the preview
and I know who the bad guy is.
And it's supposed
to be like a twist. I can tell.
I wouldn't know anything about that.
Of course not.
Did you hear about what
Scorsese's comment was about Marvel
movies recently? Marvel is not cinema.
He said, I don't see them. I tried,
you know, but that's not cinema.
Honestly, the closest I can think of them, as well made
as they are, with actors doing the best
they can under the circumstances, is
theme parks. It isn't the cinema of human
beings trying to convey emotional,
psychological experiences to another human
being.
Alright, fair enough. He didn't say they're bad.
He said it's not an end
game he just says it's popcorn it's like it's just mindless you know it's thrill-seeking he's wrong
he's wrong though transformers transformers is what he's talking about transformers
if word is the cinematic equivalent of banging pots and pans together i can't even follow the
action scenes in transformers. It's just like
someone took a dumpster filled with
metallic bits and threw it in
the air. That's a Transformers
action scene. I don't even know who the good guys
are or the bad guys. I can't tell.
Endgame made me cry. Sounds like when
I watch Marvel movies.
You haven't seen Endgame.
Oh, Black Panther. He's got to be a
bad guy, right? Yep, he's a negro.
I saw the one before that, the big war.
And you liked it.
Yeah, it was better than I thought, but at no point was I like,
wow, you're giving me new thoughts.
That's because you're not invested.
That's totally fair.
I don't know any of the characters' names.
Yeah, I'm invested in these characters.
And I'm like, I want to say it's 26 Marvel movies or something i've seen every fucking one of them and at this point when like captain
america picks up that fucking hammer and and like and when he like his arm is broken and he just like
cinches it up tighter is his arm broken yeah when he says avengers assemble like like all of that
stuff when yeah captain america is like it really inspiring very hard for me to get a vibe on how powerful he is.
I think I cried a little.
Yeah.
I think I cried a little.
I cried repeatedly.
I was such a baby.
I cry a lot, though.
I cry for victory.
I don't usually cry for when sad things happen, but when good things happen, when the guy's
achieving his mission, that's what gets me.
Taylor, when is the last time you cried because
of an entertainment property of some
kind? A song, a video, a movie?
Shit.
And you could count if you
were able to stifle the tears
away by like...
Isn't that sad?
But you know that if you just embraced it, you'd have totally cried.
I'm trying to think because I really hate sad movies.
I don't like dramas that are sad.
I like dramas that are like thriller or psychological thriller, that kind of shit.
Yeah.
But I'm genuinely trying to think.
Maybe the last time I watched The Return of the King,
when this was probably like
eight years ago or something.
Where like, when
the troll is starting to, they're in
Minas Tirith. Gandalf and Pippin are sitting there.
I'm sure you already know the scene, Kyle.
And the troll is hammering away
and it's kind of just noise in the background
and all the Gondor
soldiers are there knowing that this is the
end. And Pippin's like,
is this the end, Gandalf?
And he's like, no, this isn't the end.
And he starts describing something,
trying to help his buddy Pippin feel better.
That life is just the first step.
And there's stuff beyond this.
White Shores.
All that kind of stuff.
Is there hope for Mr. Frodo?
Well, there never was much hope.
Yeah.
Fool's hope.
Yeah.
And that was a nice little tie back to him calling him a fool and all that.
Yeah.
That was probably the last time.
And that was a very,
very many years ago.
I cry for that green mile so much more easily than you.
I cry watching snippets of movies on YouTube.
The last time I cried over a movie
was probably 30 minutes ago i'm watching one of these silly spider-mans and the end of it goes
like this there's a bad guy who we're not invested in we don't know anything about him he's in a
mechanized rhinoceros it's ridiculous a mechanized rhinoceros with machine guns and it stands on its hind legs and it's
shooting at all the police and this child in a spider-man uniform stands between the police
and the rhinoceros and just gets yeeted just then spider-man shows up and he's like kid i got this
one and then he grabs a bullhorn and says hey hey, on behalf of the people of New York and real rhinoceroses, why don't you put your paws up?
And the guy goes, no, I'm going to kill you.
And Spider-Man goes, you want me to come over there so you can kill me?
I'll be right there.
And then he does his thing and he launches and he grabs a manhole cover and deflects three missiles and attacks and then the scene ends you don't even see how the fight goes but i'm like the bravery
and it's his comeback and i get torn up over good shit i was so my dad brought his guitar and my my
friend brought her guitar and they were playing guitar together and uh and we're all singing along
having having a little jam session. Sounds fun.
And I was playing.
Anytime that everybody didn't know the words to a song, I'd find it on YouTube on my TV so it had the lyrics there.
Because maybe you know 90% of the lyrics or 95%, but maybe there's a word here or there that you don't exactly know what they even say.
And we're doing Johnny Cash and a bunch of old stuff.
And I was like, Dad, have you ever heard Hurt by Johnny Cash?
And he's like, no, I don't think I've heard it.
I was like, it's a cover song.
And I was like, it's pretty sad.
It's after his wife died.
He sang this.
And I played it.
And I don't think I'd ever seen the official video.
I was crying.
Really?
I had to leave the room.
I had to leave the fucking room.
It was so goddamn sad.
There's imagery of Jesus Christ being crucified.
There's imagery of Johnny Cash as a younger man
and his wife when she was quite young
and them in love and stuff.
And he's like,
What have I become?
My sweetest friend.
And there his wife is smiling and young.
And I'm just like,
I lost it. I had to leave. I had to leave. Oh, wait and young and I'm just like I lost it I had to leave
I had to leave
oh wait no I'm lying it was more recent
than that it was the most recent time I watched
when he's like
grandpa were you a hero in the war
and grandpa said no
but he served
in a company of heroes
and like that was just like
see I'm different than like that was it's just like oh this point you see i'm different
than like i think you guys were like i'll just like have a couple tears come down and that'll
be like and i'll just be like yeah yeah i'll get the shaky chin i'll like i'll try you know i try
not to like go just start bawling i don't i don't like that but like but like the tears will just be
pouring and i get the shaky chin.
And I know that if I try to speak,
my voice is just going to crack.
And it's going to be,
why do they have to go and fight those
that didn't deserve to die?
Not like that.
My tears are like, fuck yeah, tears.
I've got tears.
I've got a runny nose.
Not like a shaky chin.
It's a different sort of thing.
But if you empathize with people,
like if, you know, when you watch a movie,
kind of like Green Mile,
and someone is just getting relentlessly bullied,
like just way over the line kind of shit,
then you might cry a little bit at the Joker movie.
Because that guy, just like every you can
tell like ever the mood in the theater after all of it spoiling too much no no i'm not saying
anything i'm just saying that this is all from i've been throwing a whole lot of plot line i
haven't seen any trailer well i haven't seen any meaningful trailers i just saw like his
i guess jacqueline pho, if I'm saying his name right.
He got in great shape for it.
No, he got emaciated level.
Well, that's how I like him.
He is grossly skinny. And two years ago, he was like,
Taylor, if Taylor gained 30 pounds of fat.
Oh.
So still hot.
Yeah.
He was like a really
bulky guy with big shoulders
and big arms.
What was that movie?
You Were Never Really There or something like that.
Or You Were Never Really Here when he's taking out
the child pedophile ring with a hammer.
Yeah, you're right. That was a really, really
good movie. He shoots that guy in the spine.
Which one of you killed my mother? Was it you you did you kill my mother like what's he gonna do
i i like him a lot as an actor he's a guy that i feel like gets slept on a lot
i like him a lot too man he killed it in gladiator when he's the creepy fucking
emperor commodus it's he's good he's good and signs remembering signs when he's there with uh
mel gibson back in mel gibson up with the aliens i don't sleep on him he's one of my
i feel like there's a lot of people in hollywood who are just good at pretending
you know but then there are a few guys who can act who can really draw something out of you
joaquin phoenix philip seymour hoffman Philip Seymour Hoffman was also very good.
I don't know.
My list is pretty short. Kyle has
one that he thinks highly of.
Daniel Day-Lewis is my
favorite American actor.
Is he not American?
No. But he's so good, you don't
know it. Oh, yeah. Hugh Laurie
could do that, too. I want for
no one else to succeed.
That's amazing.
Yeah, I love him. His last movie
is about him being a goddamn seamstress, though.
What?
Yeah, I kind of skipped
over that one a little bit. I watched a few of the clips of it.
Who could possibly care?
He doesn't do much. I used to admire
Tom Hanks for choosing scripts.
If Tom Hanks made a movie, it was probably good.
Oh,
I like Samuel L.
Jackson for the exact opposite reason.
If I approach Samuel L.
Jackson on a free afternoon of his and said,
Hey,
I've got an idea for a movie.
I've got a super eight camera.
Here's $300.
It'd be like,
you think it'll take all night.
He would take that.
He would do that movie like he don't matter
what comes across his desk he does it and i i like appreciate the fact that he's like yeah
or in his head he must be like yeah my job is i'm a professional player of pretend yeah and the more
pretend people want me to play i'm gonna play pretend he sees himself like a carpenter you think of the carpenter is the house very artistic
how many people are gonna look at this house
after I'm done
I don't care
$30 an hour
yeah let's go
I'll put some studs up
he looks like a real fucking job
he talked about that on Stern
he's like hey I got a price
and then I go to work.
That's the smart way to do it.
High IQ. I like that.
He's got so much money.
He's bulletproof.
For some reason, it's like he does
so many of them and they're the really
good ones and the really bad ones and no one gives
him shit for the bad ones and they give him praise for the good ones he i think he's
unique in that way like i don't know if you are aware taylor but he's one of the main marvel
characters you know he's got a huge role in all of the marvel movies he just finds his way and in
star wars isn't he finds his way of avengers where he's like all right here's you go to baltimore and
do this you go to yeah he plays commissioner gordon yeah no i know that's the other guy that's that other awesome actor uh gary oldman gary oldman
but see to my point daniel day lewis net worth less than 50 million dollars
sammy jay net worth about a quarter bill it's working for sammy jay but there are a lot of
people who when they release a clunker their market value goes down yep yeah yeah for sure for sure um so yeah I'm gonna go check out Joker I
want to see it uh I gotta find a good theater I don't like going to low rent theaters I'd like to
go to a place maybe where they serve like food at a table that might even be cool oh go to one of
those uh I don't know if you have them there like five star lounge places with like amc or whatever where you just like you sit in a big reclining chair
that's got heated seats and there's just a button right next to you and you hit the button and
you're like oh yes ma'am i'll have a popcorn a basket of fries and a bud light movie theaters
have improved a bunch in my lifetime around here we have one that has really good chairs, not heated though.
And I thought that was awesome.
But now that I know there's heated and stewardess buttons,
my theater's like declined a bit in my eyes.
Yeah.
Someone was talking behind us at the theater
and the couple that my girlfriend and I were there with,
they're all kind of shy and I love public conflict.
And they like... Did you bear hug him and move
him out of his seat no no
you have more than one tactic carry
on I'm being
facetious because I wanted
to keep watching I just want to watch the fucking movie but he kept
like
like after anything would happen
like just a torrent of whispers
and like I took the
polite ass route
and just turned around and was like can you please stop talking and when i turned around i saw it was
a guy clearly in his 50s and his wife so not like a rambunctious guy he's like what's that i'm like
please stop talking and he goes oh okay okay that couldn't have went better he stopped talking and then my girlfriend like
tried to ask me a question i'm like i can't answer i'll be a hypocrite i just what if he said
suck my cock what would the taylor response
oh if he had said that to me yeah be like is that what you want to do tonight
lose a fight in front of your wife at a theater?
That's good.
My head went to like, let's see it.
Present them.
I killed 18 Iraqis.
I think I can handle one little pale punk.
I'm trying to tell this story anonymously.
You're lucky I'm waiting until the end of Anonymous I have a friend in my
Universe and he was going for
A job interview at a company on earth
And
Anyway the person interviewing
Him was super nervous
Like just on edge
Like yeah like and
He's telling the story to us and he's
Like I don't know what she's worried about.
It's been like 10 years
since I killed anyone at all.
Because he had served in Iraq.
Could you move your enormous skull
and I'll lower my voice?
That's what we're discussing.
Just how big and round it is.
Like a fucking lollipop out of a cartoon.
Sir, I'm going to headbutt you
right into the ground
then I'm gonna fuck your
wife as your corpse
twitches there because I'm watching
the Joker and I'm feeling a little twisted
is that what you
want to do tonight lose a fight in front of your wife
where's that from I don't know
she seemed funny
I don't think it's a I don't think it's i don't think
that's not a quote that's memorable for me i don't think i've heard that i don't know
i didn't go uh i saw right now i know we talked about ufc a little bit ago a friend of mine is
into like amateur ufc stuff and he went to his first like sanctioned event for like i know there's
like ufc and uh the other bellator and this was like some much smaller one
yeah yeah there's a lot of them there's a ton of them i had no idea and so we paid we went there
were like hundreds of people watching i can see how that format would be shit if you're in those
giant arenas though where like you're trying to see and you can't this we were close enough that
we could watch and it was just as entertaining if not more
entertaining than a lot of ufc fights because the skill level was way lower and so like the
women who went out to fight for like the first bout just were like borderline pulling hair and
biting just it was really really great and then like i never realized like how nervous you get
on behalf of other people when you watch it in person i was
thinking like i don't give a fuck about any of these these people you know up until my friend
goes up there and then of course i'm pulling for him but like someone would catch a big like right
hook and i'd be like oh he probably got work tomorrow like you gotta go home and then get up
and go to be a teller at bank of america And I was watching my buddy fight and he was in the best shape I've ever seen him in.
He's already in very, very good shape.
And he comes out to whatever his walkout song was.
I don't remember what it was, but it was funny and ironic.
And I was like, hell yeah, brother.
And this other guy comes out and it starts out like so so fast they're both just like amped up on
adrenaline you know even more so than like a ufc fighter because the ufc fighters they've been
there before they act like he's been there before they're like i'm not gonna go hog wild in round
one i this is a you know a marathon not just a little sprint and they clashed and i was like
standing at the bar getting a drink like turning around, just watching as the lady's getting it for me.
And I see my buddy go in for some behind-squeeze move,
and I'm like, you got him, you got him.
But then the other guy threw him into the cage,
and I was like, oh, phew.
Ow, that looks like no fun whatsoever.
But the other guy got so overconfident that he dove onto my friend.
And my friend's like a black belt in jujitsu.
He's very, very good.
And he somehow did a little reversal whoop-de-doo and locked in that just reverse naked.
Look out, Joe Rogan.
Taylor's coming for your job.
He's doing the one that looks kind of gay.
No, it's the rear naked choke.
So he ended up finishing in like a minute and five seconds.
Like just he dominated the guy.
And we were all so stoked on him.
And I was like, so, dude, that looked exhilarating.
It also looks like absolutely no fun from where I'm standing.
But you're going to do this again.
He's like, we're going to do this again. He's like,
we're going to play it by ear.
Oh,
one thing that impacts me about seeing fights in person on TV,
they don't give much attention to the losers in person that you get to
watch that guy that gets knocked out.
Sometimes they almost hide his misery and pain but in real life
like you see him helped back to the locker rooms you know like not even walking well people get
injured people get of course the brain injury is kind of what i'm describing people or they just
get crushed i guess at the at the level you were watching it it's not so much their future and their career. There's only one knockout.
And that was at the 205 weight.
And one of them was like, it was pretty even the whole time.
There's like a 6'3", lean string bean looking kind of black guy.
And then a white guy who's like six foot and just big, big guy.
And the black guy was getting like i i thought the whole time he was
winning like getting more strikes because he had the range but none of them were that hard
when i talked to my friend later he's like yeah but go back like well you can't go back and look
nobody's throwing nobody fucking cares but then like out of nowhere and like the final round
the the stocky white guy threw just just a bomb and knocked this guy out to the point where like you know like when
a body just goes like yeah it's just just straight down just a vertical like this sniper footage yeah
like tower seven just straight down and and then like after and then the guy's going around whoa
whoa stoked on it because like he thought he was gonna lose just by points and he knocked that guy
the fuck out and then the lean, the stream being black
guy stands up and is like
a couple seconds later wobbling
around like yelling at the ref.
Like, I wasn't out!
I wasn't out! And everybody around him has to
be like, you were out. You were pretty goddamn out,
man.
We're in the parking lot. That was an hour ago.
Yeah.
There's no more fighters here.
I've seen fighters attack the ref. I'm the parking lot. That was an hour ago. Yeah. There's no more fighters here. I've seen fighters attack the ref.
I don't even mean the ref. I'm the janitor.
Accidentally. And I've even done it.
I've told the story too many times.
But yeah, they're compromised enough
that like, all right, I'll just take the ref down.
And then they quickly realize,
like, why is my opponent fully dressed
in black and white stripes?
But that's fun to watch, too, when they mix that up.
Yeah.
It's a crazy business.
Good stoppage when they go for the ref.
I like fighting.
Me, too.
I like watching fighting.
I don't think I feel like fighting.
Yeah.
I don't want to roll.
You can have all that.
Yeah.
I don't think so.
Maybe a kid.
I'd like to beat the shit out of a little kid.
I think that would really make me feel good about myself i you know what i think would impress my
crowd a small monkey i mean it's gotta be the right shoulder monkey a lemur i don't know like
the kind where you're really just throwing at it something yeah an organ grinder whatever that
thing is uh yeah a little yeah one of those little pirate monkeys. Yeah.
Chimpanzee, I'm told they're tougher than they look.
No, you don't want that at all.
My friend linked a video we watched
a couple nights ago, and it was from that
old Fox show, Man vs.
Beast or something like that.
And they had 40 midgets pulling an airplane
versus one elephant.
I retweeted that. Yeah the elephant wins but the midgets were
so happy because you know they're they're not slaves they just got to get out of their cages
for a day the elephant clearly didn't give a shit he's like oh i won all right put me back in my
cage guess i'll never see dirt again this asphalt asphalt's neat, though. Can you please just kill me? I remember my family.
We have names.
Yeah.
Did you see?
There was a news story where, like, on some, like, precipice or waterfall or something,
there was a family of six elephants, and the baby fell down and was, like, falling,
and all six elephants died trying to save the one oh no
and at some point
you cut your losses
my theory is each one forgot what happened
to the one before it
no they never forget
they're like 9-11 that's the joke yeah
I know
yeah I feel sorry for elephants
these ones are in the wild they weren't getting like
fucked with or anything they died of their own volition well it sounds like a cameraman
just watched it happen right that i understand look it's another one he's going in i mean but
if you if you like what if you're like watching an elephant about to make a bad decision what do you do hey stop stop it might get like minorly annoyed with you and
throw a kick back and break your sternum and you're dead on the jungle floor and six elephants
are dead i like it when animals come to the rescue of children though like you know the lions after
the wildebeest or whatever it is some big horned thing water buffalo and then all the water buffalo
to say you know what 32 of us are tougher than one lion and then they you know rescue the baby water buffalo
yeah and it's funny because like those animals are so goddamn dumb that like you'll see them do that
where like just by happenstance the lion will get too close and then like they form a little
perimeter and like doing that thing and the lion runs away and all the wildebeest are like, that was close.
Let's never try that again.
Let's never utilize this strategy to not let our young get taken.
There's one guy who's like rallying like the Bernie Sanders of like,
we have to make sure we're protecting all of the youth of this bird,
whatever we're called.
I'm 85 85 i don't
know what i'm talking about and then the next time like you notice like a lion coming they all just
bitch just yeah but i guess if they didn't we wouldn't have lions so that's the circle of life
yeah they need food too i i feel bad for the lion sometimes when i see when i see the cheetah
chasing something and it gets away like some springbok or some bullshit i'm just like oh
she needed that
yeah it was for the little cheetahs that's for the little cheetahs and if you get outrun or
outmaneuvered as a cheetah huge ego blow it's like that's your thing dude that's your fucking thing
yeah that's like if a gorilla got out arm wrestled by a chimp oh yeah that's the sound they make oh i'm gonna yeah go eat leaves about it
loser yeah yeah there was uh there's there was some kind of wildlife program on discovery channel
in prison called uh serengeti that everybody was really into like they would put a post-it on the
tv it was like hey serengeti's tonight at 8 p.m or whatever like a documentary like putting dibs on it it was like a one of
those wildlife documentaries but i think i didn't watch it but i i was i think i'll watch it when
it comes on netflix or something so i binged the whole thing because they made a narrative out of
it i think that was the gist i got where like they named the animals and they're like, Makumbu is the leader of his tribe.
His wife, Nala,
and all the little cubs.
Little Bill,
Tiny Tim,
Joe, who's going to die later.
They all have names,
and they have relationships.
I think they were referring to it
as a real-life Lion King sort of thing.
How many times did...
Because mortality in the animal kingdom is pretty shit.
Like how often they're like,
do you think they'll realize that Tatiana is now Rachel because Tatiana's
dead from a horrible attack.
She tried to convince elephants not to save their young on the side of the
precipice.
We weren't recording yesterday and the entire line pack was killed.
So we're going to a new line pack.
Now we're just going to follow this dentist around as he kills other named characters.
See, that whole dentist thing was such nonsense when that dentist paid to go kill that lion that they fucking named.
nonsense when that dentist paid to go kill that lion that they fucking named.
And then everybody had to...
I heard after that that because it cut
down on so much of the people paying
to go shoot the lions that they couldn't afford to
pay for the anti-poachers.
So dozens of lions got murdered
that would have never been hunted.
Whenever you hear a truly ridiculous
story, it's usually not
as ridiculous as it seems.
The hunter, like, oh, can you believe this jackass went and killed a lion? Or a giraffe, maybe. ridiculous story it's usually not as ridiculous as it seems you know like that the hunter like
oh can you believe this jackass went and killed a lion right or a giraffe maybe like yeah a giraffe
that was weeks away from death anyway and he paid a lot and they use it to fund a nature preserve and
like oh well when you know everything it's not as insane as the first knee-jerk reaction that we all
invented in our own heads we we just saw the picture.
I'd love to kill a giraffe.
Like when they kill an elephant over there, the media or news will try and make you think like,
and then they paid a bunch of money and got to kill whatever elephant they wanted.
It's not usually the media or the news.
It's social media.
Social media takes a picture and spreads it, and then we all invent our own story around it.
I would agree it's both, but
it's definitely the media as well, where they will
promote a picture of an elephant getting
shot and be like, these heartless
dentists just charged
into Africa through barrels of
cash at the locals and then shot
whatever elephant they wanted. In fairness, dentists are the worst among us.
I don't like dentists
either. Sadists, sons of bitches i actually i
recon i was at a friend's wedding a couple weeks weekends ago and i saw a friend of mine from uh
high school who i hadn't seen in many years clearly and i was like man what are you doing
now he's like well i'm a dentist and i like did like a... Why? Why would you do that?
Oh, great money, great benefits.
You can fix your own teeth.
I'm not sure about that last one.
Did the dentist do their own teeth? The prison dentist quit.
Oh, I bet those teeth are nasty as fuck.
Yeah, he quit his job, so then we just didn't
have one. So everybody was going
to get their teeth checked, and she would just be like,
Yep, you've got teeth.
It's Alabama, so 17 of them.
Several, several.
You've got dozens.
Well, not dozens, dozen.
You've got dozen of teeth.
Was it Alabama?
Do I have that right?
Yeah, yeah.
The guy's like, I got a rotten tooth.
I thought at least they'd take it out.
She said, no, maybe when they get a dentist, but she's not even qualified to take a rotten tooth. I thought at least they'd take it out. She said, no, maybe when they get
a dentist, but she's not even qualified to take a tooth out. What the fuck is she qualified for?
They won't even clean my teeth. It's like, Jesus, that is terrible. I didn't want to take advantage
of any of those services. She checked my teeth or whatever. And I've got a temporary cap that I
never got the permanent put on. And she's like, ah, you never got the permanent one.
I was like, actually, it's sitting at my dentist's office.
I paid for it.
I'm sure it's in a drawer somewhere.
If this ever starts hurting, I'm going to go.
She's like, sounds good to me.
She was not about to go into the drawer and start fashioning me one
and having it sent off in a mold or whatever.
No, they did not give a fuck in there.
I feel like i could have
had gangrene and like there could have been a creature living in my mouth they just need to
look in there and check a box what about other health care though what happens if you get cancer
or pregnant or something guy in there with pancreatic cancer right now he's dying
do they treat him i don't think so was he in the population yeah yeah could barely get around
they're making him work oh but don't worry he's a hardened criminal he bought food stamps while
running one of his while running one of his businesses ah well he got six years deserved
six years what was he spending it on soda he was selling them he was buying the food stamps and
then reselling them at a
I don't know, making a profit somehow.
Well, I mean, that's not chill.
Well, I mean, everybody was happy with the transaction.
The people he bought them from wanted cash
so they could buy things that
perhaps you can't buy with food stamps.
And the people buying them, you know,
were paying less than their market value.
I believe that the people who wanted to
basically slow transition their
tax-funded
program into drug money
enjoyed it. I bet they loved it.
They're like, man, I can get drugs
with this food stand. He didn't supply
the drugs. He just sold meat.
He had a small chain of
butcher shops in Tennessee somewhere.
Seemed like a nice guy. We're stealing groceries
now, bubs.
Man, you coming into my grocery store stealing all meats man i can see why it's against the law but six years seems like a lot you know he said they made an
example of him i said tell me about did he have a lot of priors and such like i'm trying to remember
how he was like hey when you hear all of it, it makes more sense. I just,
yeah,
that happens sometimes where you hear all of it.
It makes more sense.
But he'd been like a professional his whole life.
You know,
he was a businessman.
And before that in the,
like the early eighties,
he had managed some bands and he named the bands.
But,
and like,
I don't,
I'm not into music enough to,
I'm into music enough that like,
I'm like,
ah,
I've heard that band name before.
No idea who's in it.
Couldn't name you one of their songs. One of those things things but like the smithereens yeah sure he had an
interesting like backstory and everything like he was one of those guys i was in i was watching tv
at like two in the morning it was just he and i so we could have like a normal conversation
and uh yeah i felt bad for him he's got pancreatic cancer dive into that you could have a normal
conversation like as
opposed to yeah like well some of those people in there are just crazy so you can't because because
like their minds are warped like like they don't they don't think like a normal person so you've
just got to kind of be like like whenever they say something crazy you just got to be like oh yeah
that's how it is uh-huh uh-huh yeah yeah yeah the chomo comes at you you gotta get the lock in the sock i
hear you man yeah you can't be tolerating chomos you gotta represent for the family uh-huh sure
sure and meanwhile i'm just thinking like god just 14 more days 14 weeks and i can go back to a life
of postmates and media and the video games and my family who unbeknownst to
me right now is not getting along yeah i didn't they were they were worried about me at one point
because i didn't call like that's video i went like yeah i went like two weeks without calling
anybody and to me it was just like eh i'm fine they should know i'm fine but i guess they were
worried about me.
They thought something happened to me or I was in the hole or something like that. Yeah. I was
trying to talk to you and Kitty told me like, yeah, I haven't heard from him either. Like no
one's gotten through. Yeah. I went like two weeks or something like that without calling anybody.
And then like my dad's phone is set up in such a way where he couldn't receive private phone calls.
He has that, those like blocked or something like that.
And prison phone calls.
Perhaps.
But he couldn't receive phone calls from the prison phone.
So I had to call my mom, and she gets on speakerphone,
and they share.
Because one of the things you cannot do,
and this is why I didn't call into the show or do anything,
you can't do three-way calls.
They want to know who's on the other end of that phone.
Oh. And somebody apparently had called into a local radio show do three-way calls they want to know who's on the other end of that phone oh and uh somebody
apparently had called into a local radio show a few months before and had been doing like interviews
with them and got into a ton of trouble and the management there gotten a ton of trouble and so
i asked him if i could like call into the podcast if one to one of you and you could record the
phone call and they were like absolutely not we already had one of those people and i'm like what people he's like we had a guy doing a whole radio show from up in here it's like oh okay all right he's
like yeah just just wait just wait you'll be out in a couple months did you have no internet at all
like they have a they have um uh there's not there are computers the the library mostly has
like legal support stuff and there's a computer there's like
four computers in our dormitory um and you get in with a thumbprint and a code and i didn't really
get into the system too much i think we could use email i think we could do something with email to
send messages and there may even have even been some sort of like e-texting where like you text
from a computer to a phone or something like that but i just didn't bother with any of that
there certainly wasn't youtube or like any website for that matter like i don't think there was any
googling going on or anything like that that's almost a bummer like i i'm sure they have their
reasons that the people would you know represent the family over the internet or something in a
bad way but also like if you have people away
from computers for any length of time they come out unable to deal with the world you know that
yeah yeah there were computers in the library and there were a few computers in our dormitory
and we had access to them but i you know i didn't need the support to use those computers so i just
didn't get into it the same thing with like, like we had access to music to download onto our MP3 players.
If you had purchased one and I didn't care about that either.
I don't know if you had to pay for it or not,
or if it was free,
but it seemed like they had a huge library of music that they could
download.
Cause I heard,
I could hear it.
It's coming through their headsets.
It's so loud.
And some guys would just somehow they had like bootleg amplified their
headphones to be almost a stereo system. And they would would just somehow they had like bootleg amplified their headphones to be almost
a stereo system.
And they would like play it at night.
And it'd just be like, alright, I guess tonight
it's Biggie and Tupac night.
We're just gonna go back and forth for three
hours till this guy's batteries die.
Oh, oh, it's off. Now we can
get some sleep. Oh, nope, nope. He bought
double A's this week.
Yeah. Interesting time. Interesting time. can get some sleep oh nope nope he bought double a's this week yeah interesting time interesting time i can't wait to talk about the workout equipment on the show like oh i'm excited for
that i got it on my list oh my god prison weights what do you i can't wait to talk about what they
use for weights in prison and and just workout equipment in general because they don't have any real shit.
Not really.
That's funny.
You guys want to wrap it?
Yeah, we could wrap it here.
BKN
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