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This is 366?
366.
PKN, 366.
There you go.
Yeah, smooth as butter.
Yep.
You're reversed again.
You got rid of the dildo and you have on air now.
Or am I just now noticing on air?
The on air thing behind you.
I don't even know.
I've been having so many technical issues.
Every time I touch a thing on this PC, things explode.
I reformatted everything to factory settings and so just getting everything like geared up the way it was before i don't even
know how to reverse the camera like it's not a setting in logi um it's going back and forth
multiple times yeah it does that on its own that's how it likes to do things it chooses
how we're gonna be looking it's all up to it i got a new new mixer. I got this XLR Wave, Wave XLR thing.
It's an Elgato thing
and it was working super well until today.
I don't think anything's wrong with it.
Can it do like voice modulations and things?
No, it's just a basic bitch, just a fucking mixer.
But my old mixer is old
and I just wanted to get something else.
I thought there'd be less hiss and less static and nonsense
if I had just had something new.
And there was
there is um but it was fucking up right before we went to go on so i replaced it with the old one
and then rebooted the pc like three fucking times and then the one you're using now is the same one
we all yeah got with it right well it's the one i've always had like it's it's a it's an old like
xeno something something zephyr i don't even know exactly what it is but it's the one i've always had like it's it's a it's an old like xeno something something
zephyr i don't even know exactly what it is but it's old it's the one i've used for like
10 years or something like that i think woody gave it to me like 10 years ago or something
like that i think he actually mailed it to my house uh you really got his money's worth out
of that i have years i have i've gotten every bit of his money's worth out of it. But yeah, I'll get that wave thing working.
Well, I mean, if his motorcycle trip turns south or
runs out of food and supplies, maybe Jackie will send you all of his audio equipment
and you'll be fine. I'm hoping so. I'm hoping so. I wonder what else
we'd get from the estate. Do you think
you want a motorcycle? because i've already got one
i'll take one i would take it and like sell it what i would well i i would forge woody's
signature on it and sell it to a fan i guess i wouldn't work now well what am i gonna do get a
motorcycle license what are you gonna do like get some crayola crayons out and write with your left fist yeah would be as he ever i've never seen the original woody's gamer okay i've never i've
never seen his signature is it oh is it a rough one yeah not good well you know he does the best
he can you know does he sign woody's gamer tag um I don't know what he signs.
I think so.
I think so.
I was just talking about his handwriting in general, like his penmanship.
Oh, yeah.
I do remember.
That's not.
Did you ever.
Did you practice the FPS Russia signature so that it would look as natural as like a Kyle Myers signature?
Because, you know, your name, like you get into a rhythm.
Yeah.
I mean, I just ended up doing it so many times because like we did a
bunch of um oh is that a is that a oh yeah there's who's where did that come from it's been eight
years since i met woody and colin paintball event and they signed my xbox yeah yeah oh yeah see the
controlling engagement in the little block letters oh white is that white boy seventh street it is
that's a white boy seven Now, his is pretty slick.
Now, White Boy's is pretty neat.
I love the 7.
Yeah, it's kind of got like a street art vibe to it.
Woody's done the way Control the Engagement is written.
I can't judge because I have tiny little shitty handwriting also, but it does look like 5th grade-esque.
Yeah. so but it does look uh like fifth grade-esque yeah and then you've got a giant conquering the
will you sign my xbox and what he treated it like it was a yearbook page like he's gonna go around
everybody else there and ask for the random people's signatures yeah i don't know man um but
no i had signed so many things that i eventually just kind of came up with a like i you know
how the F was
going to look and everything because I remember there was this one time when like what did we do
we did some kind of a thing where I had to sign like so many of these little like business card
things and like they were going out in mailers or something like that it was it was maybe maybe
when I did that video game I don't remember what it was but I ended up having to sign like a
thousand two thousand of these things and so I'm just sitting there over video game. I don't remember what it was, but I ended up having to sign like 1,000, 2,000 of these things.
And so I'm just sitting there over and over.
And I don't know.
You get into a rhythm or an easiest way to do things kind of thing after a while.
Well, I've never had that problem.
That would be annoying as shit, though, I would imagine.
Signing shit is annoying.
Not like individually.
Like if somebody just wants some shit signed like i don't mind that a bit but like when you've got to sit there with like a stack of
things and like just at your house smoking weed just signing your fucking fake name over and over
it's so it's just it's not only is it surreal but like the the surrealness wears off very quickly
and it's just annoying yeah and but there's only one thing that's even more annoying than that
and that's
signing someone else's name because they were too lazy to take part in the fundraiser that
made them ten thousand dollars and you didn't want to let their fans down so any of you who
have a wings of redemption signed poster um you'll notice he's got some good handwriting
he's got some good handwriting um he's got an interesting way of writing wings of redemption it looks so much like so much like like very nice flowing cursive you know um because like
you know we did that fundraiser for him with like the i'm down cow posters were like yeah
you know like i went out into a field with him and like got some sweet feed it for anybody who
doesn't know anything about cows, it looks like dog food,
but it smells wonderful. I don't know what they do. They compress oats together.
Bunch of sugar. Spray it with molasses or something.
You would think the way it smells, it smells like a delicious breakfast cereal, like maple oat crunch or something. In reality, you
don't want to try it, but the cows love it. We poured out some of that and the
cows gathered around. We took pictures of him in the field for the posters you know the
i'm down cow joke and everything and then it was time for him to sign like i don't know 850 posters
and and that's when he like quit the program and went back to south carolina and so there i am like
i'm like what but who's going to sign these?
And Kenny's like, it's not going to be me.
Well, fuck.
All right.
I guess I'm the only one here that doesn't have arthritis and hasn't abandoned the program.
And he already got the money at that point.
And he already has all the money.
So like, yeah, I sat there and ended up signing a lot of shit.
I've still got some. I went the other day to my uh
my dad's house i've got a few things in storage they're just like odds and ends that didn't make
sense to bring out here like um like like my ski gear is there like like uh ski gear you hate
skiing well i i think i misspoke not not exactly my like my like winter gear like like my like thick like sub-zero coats and
like uh like my ski pants i have ski pants and like that shit like like the sub-zero weather
shit anyway all my junk that like didn't need out here in this house in atlanta and amongst that is
a big box of i'm down cow posters with it well with my signature on them and uh and a bunch of
other stuff i was like holy shit
look at this dad he was like that's that big boy you're friends with i'm just like yeah that's him
he's like did he ever lose the weight and i'm like well not exactly well you lost some and found it
and what i i haven't seen boogie's progress in a while did he gain it all back um i i have no idea what he's up to you know
he's on those aggravated assault charges last time i heard that is unreal that i mean obviously you
fire a gun in your front yard something's gonna happen in a school zone you know as a warning
somebody might stream the other day they were like didn't he shoot into a preschool though and i'm like i'm
like man shit gets twisted on the internet like like no he did not shoot into a preschool he was
with malice like wasn't he blowing preschoolers away like pumpkins it's like no yeah i heard he
had a gun in each hand and he was dressed up like yosemite sam yeah and no like none of that
happened he like fired a warning shot because
there was a scary man in his fucking yard.
Oh, wow. He went out. He responded
to the allegations. I'll check that out later.
I don't want to watch a video or anything
right now. I'll look at that later.
Interesting, though.
Last I heard, he had those aggravated assault charges
against him. Hopefully that all works out because
that's nonsensical.
Yeah, it is.
Meanwhile, his instigator still free on the streets hassling people yeah in public parks and just walking up to people and being like you're a disgusting fat person and
like is that what he does you just want i mean i've never watched a full video of his but i've
seen click clips tossed around on like twitter and stuff and it's like truly an uncomfortable level of confrontation
where he's just like no one attack him ever like nobody doesn't seem like he must be a big guy i
don't was he much taller than boogie i don't know how tall boogie i don't know how tall either of
them are he does look like a husky fella like He's not a little dude, for sure.
I don't know that he's like 6'6",
or some colossal human being,
but he's definitely an imposing person, I guess.
Yeah, I don't know.
I talked to my dad.
Having the GoPro on his forehead
as he's harassing you.
It would be very upsetting.
It would be annoying as shit.
You just got to get away from him
and call the police.
That is the move,
and that's what Boogie should have done.
Because everything else that you could possibly imagine doing,
that's what he wants you to do.
Yeah.
You need to be loud enough for everybody else at the park to hear and be like,
dude, this guy's trying to show me child pornography on his phone.
This guy's trying to show everybody.
This guy, don't talk to this guy.
He's trying to show me child porn on his phone.
Like, the only way to get out of it would be to amplify past what he'd be.
Does that?
No, no.
I'm saying that's what you would do if you were approached.
Is that offensively you accuse him of looking at child pornography on his phone?
Oh my God.
I thought for a second you were saying that like that's one of his bits is that he goes up to some dude who's in the park and he's like, like starts having like a quiet conversation with like, Hey,
you live around here. I'm kind of lost. And they're leaning. Yeah. Yeah.
I can probably help you. Maybe they get their phone out. He's like,
this guy has child porn. Look at him. He's showing me little boys dicks.
Look at somebody do something.
No, that, that would be funny.
Actually,
this might be a good bit, right?
As I'm saying it, I'm like like i kind of like see that like just just some poor single mother in a park or something just like the most unlikely
person to be doing it is funnier if you pick someone who it would like never be in a million
years but i don't know how hardcore frank is but if he did it to like like a catholic priest i'd
be down for that i I'd watch that.
And it would be even better if – what if he did it to a Catholic priest as the ultimate fucking cringe bit?
But then the cops showed up, and they were like –
It was real.
Father Morris, just show me your phone, and we'll call this a wash, and we'll take this hassle fellow away.
And he's like, why should I have to show you my phone?
Don't do that.
That's incidental child pornography.
You had no right to look.
You're acting very suspicious right now and clutching that phone.
Just hand it over.
You're acting oddly.
It says here in your file you grew up in Brooklyn.
That's a terrible Irish accent.
That's not very good.
Yeah.
No, that was like I saw like some comments on Twitter years ago of someone like not about this guy, Frank Hassel,
but someone else who makes people uncomfortable.
And they were like, no, the only way I can think of off the top of my head to get rid of people
is to accuse them of looking at child pornography and trying to show it to you loudly.
And it's like, damn, that does seem now you're part of a scene also.
And if,
if the person you're going toe to toe with in an uncomfortable situation off
is someone like Frank Castle or someone who like,
you know,
makes their,
their,
their beans doing stuff like this,
you're not going to out uncomfortable them.
Like I saw one video where he like walked into an outdoor dining area and
just sat down with people he didn't know and started eating food off of their plates.
Like in Seinfeld.
Like in Seinfeld.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He turned that into a real life thing, which I would be livid if someone touched my food at a restaurant.
Like that would put me into an immediate self-defense situation.
Yeah.
I mean, it's got to be petty theft of some kind. a restaurant like that would put me into an immediate self-defense situation yeah i mean
it's got to be petty theft of some kind for stealing fries off of i i mean literally isn't
it like you come in and like like you've ruined someone's meal especially like during covid times
like there's no way you can eat the rest of that i wouldn't if somebody comes digging around in my
french fries i'm not i'm not gonna finish them yeah of course it doesn't matter what era it is like covid not covid some random person touches my food i'm not i'm not trifling with that
they might be one of those people who don't wash their hands after they take a shit there was some
survey maybe i dreamed this but i'm pretty sure it's real that that an alarming percentage of
people i mean obviously i don't wash my hands after i pee that's silly my penis isn't dirty but after you shit that's just common courtesy for everyone a high percentage of
people don't wash their hands after they shit and it's you know it's an l for the guys because
obviously men do it more than women or maybe men are just more honest about the survey yeah i i know
like like uh whenever i run to go take a piss on Twitch, they're like, did you wash your hands?
I'm like, of course I didn't wash my hands.
Like how filthy, how bad are you?
Like Dwight had a great line from The Office.
Like how bad are you at going to the bathroom that you need to wash your hands after every time?
Like are you just coming out of there like, oh, I pissed.
God, I've got to stop catching the urine like a bowl with my hands.
It's just unsanitary why do
i do this to myself it's just vile pissing all over your hands sometimes at the trough i'll
piss on someone else's hands well i mean in the trough i mean that's their kink and i'm not gonna
i mean i'm not exactly taking part in it but i gotta go and they're there dude i remember being
like five years old at blues games and like
walking up to the trough with like adults and being like, this is something's not right here.
Like, this is gross. Like they like I shouldn't be here standing next to adults like I'm in the
splash zone. I don't recall being splashed, but like that's disgusting. They should have.
My dad should have just put me in one of the one of the.
Oh, I think I've said this before.
This is actually at a blues game when I was like maybe like 19, 20 years old.
And I was just drunk.
Me and my friends got drunk as shit before we went.
And so I had to and we were like sneaking booze throughout it.
We're all drunk, having a good time, like in the like right after the second period or whenever, when everybody has to piss the most like I dilly dally and I like get a hot dog or something first.
And then I go to the line and it's too long.
I'm not going to make it through before the third period starts.
And like my piece of shit, like drunk brain was like, oh, dude, Taylor, pretend you lost a kid in the bathroom. And so I was like acting as though I had lost a child as I walked through the line.
And then I got up.
I got up and then I went in.
Literally something like that.
Never in my life would I do this sober.
But my drunk mind was like, you got to get back in time for the third period.
Like probably like late teens.
Okay, so this wasn't, you're you're supposed to ah this was three months yeah this was i was 29 this was this was
nine months a while ago yeah and uh i remember and i thought i'd made it like scott free but like
obviously the people in the line just saw me go through and then make it in there
and like this one guy was like i don't remember exactly what he said because i was so drunk but
i came out of there and i think he said like that is low dude
either that or like you're a piece of shit i don't think he said
that would actually hurt my feelings a little bit. Yeah. If somebody's just belligerent and mad, you don't care.
You're just like, yeah, fuck you too.
But if they're just like, I'm disappointed.
That was low class what you just did.
I would be ashamed if I were you.
There was no one named Adam at all the whole time.
There was no child.
Here's the best.
What if a little kid named Adam had walked out?
Like, yeah?
Yeah?
Oh, the other Adam.
Different Adam. Different Adam.
Have you seen a child exactly like yourself?
No.
Let me check this empty stall.
Excuse me, sir.
Let me go in there for a piss length of time and check.
Yeah.
Yeah, that was low of me.
That's a really shit thing to do.
That's why I try not to drink when i'm like
at some like i don't i don't really drink at the movie theater i always want to get that giant
popcorn and uh because because i love popcorn in a movie but like yeah i get thirsty and then i end
up drinking like some enormous we always get like cherry coke i always end up drinking like a pint
of cherry coke and then i've got a piss like crazy and I miss part of the movie I hate it maybe I need a I need a girlfriend that's into like water sports
and I could just pee into her mouth while we're in the movie theater that'd be the best solution
for all this that would be they should offer that as a service yeah probably have shit like that in
like Thailand you think so you just piss directly into a poor woman's mouth that or a young boy
or a young boy that's that seems more like like what country would do that I guess Afghanistan
they they seem to like their young boys they do I read this report about um like the Taliban going
through and uh like uh doing a lot of rape and uh the article said that they weren't very particular
on whether the women were still alive or not that, that they were even raping the women's corpses. Is there video of this?
Well, I didn't watch any necrophilia over the weekend, no. But I didn't really delve too much
deeper into it after I read that the Taliban were raping corpses. They seem like a bunch of nice
guys. I saw them on the bumper cars i mean i saw them in
the gym yeah uh do you see the gym clip where they're just like cheesing and like doing incorrect
form lat pull downs and one guy was on an elliptical going backwards yeah and it's like
that's not how you picture the taliban like and and they we lost to that team like yeah kind of
oh and two against guerrilla warfare.
We need to take a break from war.
We've clearly lost our touch.
We need to go beat the shit out of like,
well, I was going to pick a country
that would be easier to conquer than Afghanistan,
but I guess there isn't.
Like, Canada would put up a way bigger fight than that.
I don't know.
I think you just need to pick someone
with easier geography to manage. Like, it was just all those caves and those mountains and
afghanistan it's pretty fucking big then you had the whole tribal thing where you could never like
get the lead of the grand poobah anyway there was always it was always just like another chieftain
and another town was was the guy in charge and they had no idea who was eight towns down and
like it's not like one guy could agree, yeah, we've got peace now,
and anybody would go along with it.
I think it was pretty difficult.
I mean, the Russians failed in the 80s.
That's true.
The Soviets, I should say.
Yeah.
So we weren't even the first at this.
No, no.
Losing the space race,
second to lose to Afghanistan.
Second to lose to Afghanistan.
Yeah.
Not going well.
Not going well.
Just a series of L's for the U.S.
I think like a South American country, we could roll in there and like Honduras.
Like we wanted to conquer Honduras.
I think that like we could make that happen.
Yeah.
Except we never like conquer South America.
We just like use the CIA to like depose leaders and fund rebels i think that's
cheaper oh it's definitely cheaper and you don't have to like admit it either you can be like oh
man shit's getting uh crazy in honduras and it's like because of the sanctions we levied and the
militia groups were funding no because of. Yeah, I think we did something to Venezuela.
I just remember when Hugo Chavez was at the UN,
like George Bush just had spoken and Hugo Chavez goes up
and he's like, I can smell the sulfur.
Satan was just here.
And I just imagine like...
He said that?
Yeah.
Okay, that guy rules. right and like i don't
think george bush has a sense of humor about shit like that i don't think he went chavez call me the
devil like like that he was just like yeah operation shoot him with the cancer gun make it
yeah do it do it he like he died of like eight kinds of cancer like a couple years later and you know
as a head of state you're always getting medicals they're always they look after those guys
especially like somebody like him come on like they shot that dude with the cancer gun i bet
they do have a cancer gun i guarantee they've got a heart attack gun and a cancer gun what are they
what are they at a sillier gun what would what would some fun guns
an erectile dysfunction gun oh that's a you're gonna ruin his his confidence and undermine the
country subversively that way so you have a weak limp-dicked man who no longer feels confident
in being a dictator because he's been and now his penis is is the useless i was thinking autism gun
an autism gun yeah he just, now he's like
really into Sudoku. Yeah.
Blast him with the autism gun
and like he can't, he's wearing
fucking earmuffs at the State of the Union
and shit.
He's getting afraid of the noises and stuff.
Every time like all the Dems stand
up to clap or all the Republicans or whatever
he's just like, he's getting freaked out.
The only world leader with a fidget spinner
sitting there.
Autistic as shit.
Not only can he not make eye contact,
he can't look at the camera for addresses.
He's just kind of doing one of these.
The economy is going pretty poorly right now.
He's adjusting his earmuffs.
It's just...
It's not promoting any confidence.
You can give him an autism gun.
I wish I had an autism gun.
Oh, yeah.
You could use it on yourself, reverse it.
Yeah, just turn that thing back down to zero from a 12 or whatever it's on now.
Or, I mean, if you could tune in your level of autism,
you could go right to genius level on something.
I imagine it would be like a like
a frequency like a radio where like you could be like uh now i'm really into submarines right now
okay i don't want that uh oh finance that's beneficial i'm obsessed how often it works
though i know but with this gun it could be people think it is that's the problem like
there was a movie that came out a few years ago a new predator movie and the whole premise that's so laughable that this shit could have been a comedy was that this man's son was so
goddamned autistic that he could like saw that he could like operate alien technology that's like a
thousand like a thousand years in the future like his autism is allowing him to like
fucking like like work out his way yeah just guess his way through like alien
languages and technology that's not even like in any way similar to our language at all it's not
like different letters it's not like you're looking at arabic or something it's just like
symbols and like like all sorts of cuneo it looks like cuneiform it looks just like cuneiform yeah
yeah and so the premise was that he was literally so autistic that he was a fucking genius was it
like a big story arc thing for him it was the main part of this this autistic guy fucking useless
idiot he's bogging us down and then it's like no the autistic guy sees us oh the worst it's a child
it's like a 12 year old autistic kid like saves the day because he's so fucking retarded that like
he knows how to use all the predator technology and he's like just one upping the alien hunter who has come down to earth for for for man meat it was awful
and then like retarded like just yesterday i saw a reddit post and it was so fake and i went to the
comments to see like oh reddit will know they'll call this motherfucker out and it was like my my autistic son taught himself to play
piano at two years old here he is putting on a performance at five he's not on camera because
he's shy and doesn't like to be seen so it's just a picture of like yeah it's just a picture of a
stage and i guess you can kind of see a piano but you can't tell that anyone is even sitting at it and you just hear like and someone is like playing masterful piano and like i'm like they'll know
in the comments i go in the comments and everybody's like so brave what a what a what a little master
of the piano like oh he's gonna go places i mean reddit is full of bots and retards i'm like
they're playing the fucking recording there's no way that there's a five-year-old up yeah
taught himself at the age of two or three or whatever he's like in the men's department at
nordstrom like clearly the piano's auto playing right off screen and then i saw another one one
thing i'm proud of reddit on is uh their hatred for pitbulls yes great those are dangerous animals
and we need to we need to do something about it.
Yeah, we need to end the breed.
I saw a clip the other day where this pit bull
was just murdering another dog in the street,
and it's like a helpless owner couldn't stop it, and it was awful.
And actually nobody around could do anything.
Everybody's afraid to actually hit the dog.
And one guy's got a broom, and I'm thinking,
I'd have killed that dog with a broom at some point. At some point you've got to snap the broom and start stabbing the dog and like one guy's got a broom and i'm thinking like i'd have killed that dog with a broom by at some point like at some point you gotta snap the broom and start
stabbing the dog in the face or something like that because he's murdering this dog and like
the audio is hard to listen to because the other dog is like screaming like if you've ever heard a
dog fucking scream it's hard to listen to yeah and everybody's just like why won't someone do
something and it's like you're the only ones here you're gonna have to
do something or it's oh and the dog's dead and the dog's dead okay and you it's gonna come for
you next so you should have jumped in while your dog was you know eating some blows for you being
the tank of the team and i went to the comments and it was just full of like euthanize all pit
bulls in the breed and i was like oh good good good okay well then that's i i respect that i
like that yeah and my thing has always been that like well well then that's i i respect that i like that yeah and
my thing has always been that like well i don't know i don't know whether they're more aggressive
uh than other dogs or not i don't know anything about that i don't know how you would gauge
something like that seems like it might be an owner thing but uh my dad's fucking jack russell
was a real piece of shit he would attack me all the fucking time but he weighed 10 pounds
exactly didn't matter.
He wasn't like a killing machine.
The problem is the tools they have,
in my opinion,
more so than any innate aggression or evil that's in the dog.
Did you see the one where the pit bull
was attacking the Clydesdale?
Shit, it's not going to win that fight.
I didn't see that.
So you go in the park
and they got a Clydesdale.
Hopefully the Clydesdale killed it.
He did. They had those Clydesters that like pulled a little uh little
they have those here for like the budweiser they pull like the budweiser wagons they're
this was this was like one clidesdale pulling a carriage and you do like a romantic kind of
couples thing in the park um like like that episode of seinfeld and uh it all comes full
circle and um the pitbull is like running up under the Clydesdale,
I guess trying to bite its fucking dick off or something like that.
And the Clydesdale is just like, you know,
it's buckled into one of those harnesses,
so it really can't like give it its all.
But it keeps catching the fucking pit bull with one of those hooves
that's the size of your head and just sending it flying.
And eventually it cracks him a good one and kills it.
It's great.
Good.
And what was going on? Was there an owner of the pit bull yeah the owner was there unable to
it was a woman and and she was unable to do anything and what i heard was they sued her
um for like like everybody was suing her for like emotional damages yeah equine emotional damages
they're sophisticated animals the horse was like cut a little bit but i mean the pit bull was
fucking dead so so that was a good ending to mean, the pit bull was fucking dead. So,
so that was a good ending to that one.
Yeah.
Pit bulls suck.
And there is like,
I,
everyone I've met who has a pit bull knows on some level that they are the most dangerous dog as far as like the outcome of attacks,
because they always have to like prerequisite the,
they're like,
you know,
post-requisite whatever
it would be like i have a pit bull but he's the sweetest little guy he's so nice wouldn't hurt a
fly he's a rescue and and blah blah blah and it's like no that's a dangerous fucking dog were they
out of was that the only thing left were you like arnold schwarzenegger in that movie where he has
to just get the shitty toy instead of the good toy for his son they're so delusional like it would be like yeah did you i heard mark got married yeah yeah yeah he uh
he married a member of al-qaeda but what you have to understand is
great woman okay okay just salt of the earth she's one of the good ones she's one of the good
al-qaeda okay she she whenever we bring up 9-11 she's she's always of the good ones she's one of the good al-qaeda okay she whenever we bring up
9-11 she's she's always says like like that was pulled up that was terrible that was terrible
it should have been it should have been done it should have been over right away should have been
cleaner yeah you know yeah should have had 10 planes there's no reason it took that long you
know she's very disappointed in uh and and in the events of nine 11. She's one of the good,
more from an efficiency standpoint than she's mixed on the outcome.
Yeah.
I mean,
she has a go getter.
She,
she's,
she,
she works hard.
She works hard,
but it is exactly what they do with this fucking,
uh,
with this fucking pit bulls,
man.
I don't know.
I've,
I've,
I've killed a couple of pit bulls,
uh,
and they had it fucking coming.
Good.
They would,
they would,
they would,
uh,
come to our property and attack our dogs.
And, like, I just remember poor fucking Chopper, which was, like, our Doberman Pinscher was, like, the most awkward dog ever.
Like, he was a Doberman, but he was, like, nothing but legs.
He was just lanky as fuck and, like, couldn't do anything.
And this pit bull is just murdering him.
It's chased him under.
Our dog has tried to crawl
under a car to get away did you watch this happen yeah up until the point where we shot the pit bull
yeah as soon as you can get a shot so that you could shoot the pit bull and not hit our dog that
dog was dead how hurt was chopper he was fucked up he had to go to the er um he had like he had
to get stitches he was torn up pretty badly did like did neighbors get pissed like you killed our dog
yeah i didn't think so i was in a situation like that where someone i know who like lives in a more
rural area they were having like dangerous pit bulls like similar to your situation they were
having like dangerous pit bulls and it's like oh they have kids they have their own animals and
things and like they would just see these pit bulls like
prowling like tigers all the time on their property just like looking for some alpha predators yeah
they were like like they were literally waiting to go fuck with a cow when like these when they
would go in their house and the the man killed both of them when they came onto their property
again and were like approaching the cow and just buried them on his property in a random place and never addressed it with
the neighbors.
We did that a lot.
And like,
I mean,
I love dogs,
but like these dogs would come and like,
if there was a newborn calf,
they would either,
they would chase the calf until it like died.
Like,
like it would die of exhaustion the same way that wild dogs hunt in Africa.
Like they would chase the,
the,
the fucking dog to the,
the calf to exhaustion.
And the mother's like frothing at the mouth,
trying to like fight them off.
But they love that.
Cause that's like sport to them.
They're having,
they're having a great time.
Like you can tell when a dog's enjoying itself and it's just like,
Oh,
this is the best one ever.
Like they're out there having,
they're out there having a great time.
Like the same way any other dog would,
if you're tossing a ball with it.
And those dogs are not cute. Like they don't even have a cute factor going
for them they're they're not fluffy they're not nice to pet they have beady little demon eyes
they're scary fucking dogs they look like fucking cerberus or something like that
but uh yeah i don't i don't like that breed but uh mostly because the tools they have i don't know
that they're any more aggressive like i said said. I just think they're more equipped.
Oh, for sure.
Like, if you go by number... And that's always the retard tier argument,
where it's like, you'll get linked to something
about, like, chihuahuas are actually the most aggressive.
And it's like, oh, so is this what we're doing now?
We're just lying to one another?
Like, is that the...
I mean, they might be.
I mean, they might be i mean they might be but
again but aggression doesn't mean anything i could have the meanest beta fish on earth i'm fine
like because it's a fucking fish i get like if if teddy and if teddy and fozzy out there decided
like our new mo is to fuck taylor up as soon as he comes out from record we're tired of him
disappearing in here for hours and then we come out there and we think he's left let's fuck Taylor up as soon as he comes out from the court. We're tired of him disappearing in here for hours,
and then we come out there and we think he's left.
Let's fuck him up.
The worst case scenario is I get a little puncture wound on my hand
that's more like a bee sting.
I'm like, oh, you little bitch.
I'm grabbing you, throwing you in the kennel.
Whereas if a pit bull wants to harm me, it's like getting in a knife.
I might rather fight a person with a knife than a pit bull.
It's so fucking scary like it locks down it's got like a like an alligator strength like locking mechanism in its jaw i made that up but probably i mean it seems that way i've seen them like bite stuff and
then just not release and people are trying to pry their mouths open with tools and it doesn't
work like like yeah they should be jamming those tools into its carotid right in the neck those dogs um yeah i don't like those dogs at all no they suck and uh if you own
one at least don't take it to a dog park there's a reason that like at the dog park there are
what almost a majority of dog parks are like yeah no pit bulls allowed that wasn't random the person
who goes to the dog park wasn't
like fuck pip i i'm i'm bigoted toward pitbulls no they they had to watch you know enough hours
of cctv of people wailing as their like companion friend is torn to shreds that you eventually shut
it down that's never happened with the chihuahua yeah never i uh i don't know i would um i wouldn't
want one but and i think i don't think. I wouldn't want one. And I don't think
we should necessarily outlaw having them,
because I like freedoms, but
a lot of things require
qualifications, right?
Yeah, you should be
taking a gun. I don't know.
Or some little dude who's got this pitbull.
When I see a big fucking dude who's got
a pitbull, and he's clearly
controlling it, I'm like, alright.
If that thing goes crazy, he could probably lift it off the ground
you know he's not gonna let that it's not gonna drag him across the park to murder someone's
like puppy yeah dude there was when i lived in the city there was this homeless guy that had
two pit bulls he must have been doing well for himself to afford to feed himself to be an
overweight homeless guy with
two pit bulls and he would just sit on the street like sometimes only like 20 yards from the entrance
to my my apartment and like i would i would cross the street like before i would go near him because
like those dogs were both like 120 pounds they're enormous taking up the whole sidewalk he's taken
up a good bit it's like i don't trust to walk by them they're angry because they're homeless dogs they get to see
like rich people's dogs walk by and they're probably jealous of that or they're not even
jealous they want to eat those dogs and they just sat out there and he would sometimes be given like
chicken wings from the the culpeppers a restaurant he was near and I saw those dogs eat entire wings,
bones and all.
You would give them bone in wings and they would just fucking gone.
Crunch them up.
Yeah.
Apparently you're not supposed to do that.
No.
Like for a pit bull.
Apparently it's just fine.
Just toughens it up.
I think that the,
uh,
the chicken bones can like splinter and,
like damage their intestines.
I think it's like cooked bones you're not supposed to give dogs, right?
Yeah, that sounds more correct.
Yeah, because I know when I've eaten chicken wings before,
if you snap it, it's all jagged and splintery.
Yeah.
This is a switch of discussion, but when you're doing cheat days now,
if you even do any, what's your meal you're going to?
The closest I've come to cheat days is I had some pasta.
I had some chicken Alfredo the other day.
It was so fucking good.
But I kind of keep the calories where I want them anyway.
It's just more so just not eating bison every fucking day.
Yeah, that's about as close as it comes to that.
I'm not drinking Coca-Cola or anything like that,
but I just ordered some groceries,
and it's literally four pounds of bison, a pound of rice,
and like peppers, and I've added jalapeno peppers and onions to the diet,
which I'm not supposed to apparently.
They're not part of the vertical diet, I don't think, but they fucking taste good, so they're going in.
I think it's inflammation.
Onions are awesome in everything.
Onions are good, so I'm putting onions in my fucking food because I want to eat some fucking onions.
I don't think I'll melt down from eating a few onions.
I think you'll be fine.
Yeah, so they're going in there.
That's like a Tom Brady thing, i think we're like he doesn't
even eat like spicy food because it's an inflammatory doesn't eat onions doesn't eat
garlic and it's like like all that money how is he enjoying life well he winning winning the super
bowl probably it's pretty fun for him right even that like after what is it six now six i believe yeah is that even that much fun he's
just running up the score at this point i mean you gotta run up the score if jordan had known
about this era of basketball he'd have stayed in the league and ran up the score i guarantee it
like like he was like really oh yeah for sure like like he's such a fucking like mental case
about winning and losing and records. If he had known
what guys like Kobe and LeBron
were going to do, and some other guys. I don't know basketball
super well, but I guarantee
he would have spent a couple more years in the league
and ran up the score a bit.
I love you.
Shut up!
Ozzy, Teddy, please.
Please be quiet.
My wife must have just gotten home, so they're spazzing the fuck out.
Yeah, I've been doing good with the diet shit recently.
Obviously, no liquid calories or anything other than protein shakes,
but last night my brother got me this really nice whiskey,
and it was some Johnny Walker Blue Label,
and I hadn't had any of it since the the like the wedding the night of the wedding when he when he gave it to me
and i was like i'm gonna have a couple of these and it was like i poured them in like ounces so
i could like measure it for my fitness pal and like had like i guess three three of them and
it was like okay so total of six ounces of this and it was like but that's 550 calories isn't
it no it was six i think it was only like 300 calories that's impossible uh six ounces not
six shots i know yeah it's a hundred and let's say each each ounce is fucking christ this app is not as good as the one that you guys
use because it takes fucking forever to delay but uh let's see yeah six ounces 388 calories each
ounce is 60 65 calories is what i put in and so yeah i had 300 and whatever fucking
that's for like a whole shot i think like you know and a shot's an
ounce and a half i was just doing by one ounce more sense and uh yeah and after like 388 calories
of that it's like all right well i'm a little buzzed definitely not drunk if i could go back
i would have had a couple pieces of pizza instead and so i think delta eight little little zero calorie delta eight oh yeah i'm about
to to launch right after we're done with this i've got some some gummies called moonwalker
so i'm gonna take a couple of those get to moonwalking and uh it is it says 25 milligrams
but like it is bitch made compared to like real weed edibles and so you treat them like
they're tens and then it kind of equals out like it definitely yeah an entire handful like two of
them and i'm feeling like real real fucking good like and and the way these work like i don't think
they're as regulated and like good and so like some of them like sometimes i'll take two and
like an hour later i'm like i must have gotten a couple of them like sometimes i'll take two and like an hour
later i'm like i must have gotten a couple of bum ones because i only feel like a tiny bit high and
other times i'll take two and it'll be like an hour in and i am absolutely zooted like just sitting
there playing magic on my tablet and then it's like you i remember like half an hour into it
like oh yeah i'm really high like you know what i mean where
you know it creeps up on you so much you don't even notice but uh yeah mostly i'm just using
these little little vaporizer things oh yeah that's delta eight yeah delta eight disposable
this is called skywalker og and this one's called blueberry kush are you even aware that that's a
star wars reference yeah i know i know skywalk i don't i know the og is original gangster but And this one's called Blueberry Kush. Are you even aware that that's a Star Wars reference?
Yeah, I know.
I know Skywalk.
I know the OG is original gangster, but unless OG means something else in Star Wars.
But yeah, of course.
Obi-Wan Kenobi.
Oh, Obi-Wan Kenobi.
Is that what it is?
Ogi-Wan Kenobi.
Yeah, it's Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi.
You know that character the blue guy
I'm going to get you so high Luke
you won't care about the rebels
and then you can just get roasted on your
new farm here on the dirt planet
and that could have been his life
drinking blue milk
eventually gets around to cleaning
up his destroyed burned aunt and uncle man if i had to like recall what i remember from the star
wars plot it would be outright i don't remember anything i remember he they fuck up you got the
wires crossed there did i no that's where it starts. Auntie May and Uncle Aunt Peru.
Is her name Peru or something?
Is that her name?
Like Uncle Owen, Aunt Peru or something.
I have no idea what his adoptive parents were named.
Yeah, but I'm right about that.
They lived on the dirt farm in Satellite and Tatooine.
They had blue liquid they were drinking.
And then maybe the sand people kill him, and he has to avenge...
No, the stormtroopers pretending to be sand people killed his aunt and uncle.
This is all new to me.
I feel like I need to go back and watch Star Wars again.
Isn't that the way it goes?
And then Obi-Wan is like,
the formations are too straight, Luke.
These stormtroopers trying to hoodwink you.
And he's like, why'd you enter my life?
I don't remember any of this.
No.
You don't remember this?
I honestly don't.
I think I need to go back and watch some more Star Wars or something.
Either you're completely wrong,
or I just don't remember any of this shit um i don't
remember i don't remember any of that i remembered um okay at baru i can't believe you know their
names that that's like i haven't i haven't watched that shit in so long though like the original
trilogy from the 70s uh i'm not even sure i've probably never seen it all i've seen like seen
it in really bits and pieces it's just so bad
they're really terrible they're really terrible yeah as a kid i loved them because you have no
expectations or like point of reference as a kid you're just like like literally we talked about
on the show i remember thinking a lot of star wars was lame and slow except for that snow battle on
hoth where he's flying around and tying up the atats and
then darth vader's walking around fucking people up all like really hardcore and that was cool
and then it would be like 15 minutes of diplomacy where nothing is being done and they're just kind
of talking about like how they can most effectively optimize their terrorist cell yeah and i don't i don't remember
i remember being super boring and like not being able to get all the way through it like i think i
think my ex-girlfriend and i tried to watch it once and we were we were high as fuck and we got
like an hour hour and a half into like the first one and i one of us was just like hey you just
want to watch some silly shit on youtube for a while you how about that salad fingers guy remember that salad fingers let's watch him david firth
yeah just anything but this it was just i don't know it's it's just it's fucking bad i like star
trek i can watch endlessly though and and so much of star trek is is not like cool shit happening
it's a lot of talking and a lot of like diplomacy and there's
always like a moral that's sometimes like analogous to like modern times and like like
maybe you'll have like a race issue or something but it's in like it's like a it's like space
races space race yeah like there's a classic episode from the original series where you had
like these two opposing groups of people from the same planet i believe and they were bisected down the middle black on left white on right and they're against the people
who are white on left black on right and like it's about you're supposed to so it's like some
really ham-handed social commentary but they look the same to me. Exactly. Who's the fucking, who's the captain?
Kirk.
But Spock, they all look the same.
Or whatever the fuck, is that the main guy?
That's the guy.
That's the guy.
And then, isn't the best one?
You said the one that I'm going to watch, if I'm ever going to watch any,
is the one with Professor X, whatever that actor's name is.
It's okay.
The first season is awful,
but it gets better as it goes after the first season.
Like seasons three and four is where they really get into a good stretch.
But the problem is it's a little dated
and there are a few bad episodes sprinkled in
and you've really got to be a Star Trek fan.
Whereas I think if you watch Deep Space Nine,
that is when the show created like for one
thing Gene Roddenberry had died
and or was dying and he had
this thing where there could not be conflict
in Star Trek because
he viewed the character like
inter like conflict
between the main characters like the guys who were like
the good guys he thought in the future
there would be no more conflict
between like like minded advanced people so he figured like there's no reason that like
the captain should ever really like heads with the first officer that would never happen like
like we would that removes a lot of the human element you've got to have conflict or it's it's
the writers just like so then everybody like got along for 42 minutes
yeah and so they were once again in agreement yes exactly and they uh they all agreed until
they agreed some more and that's the show and it's just like now you need some some conflict
like people have to have like opposing ideals or ideas about how a problem should be solved you
need one character who's like no kill them all and you need one character who's like maybe peace is the best option and
they slowly got more into that toward the end but gene roddenberry was dead or dying with deep space
nine that's the one where they're not even flying around exploring anymore it's all on a space
station and so you've got like lots of like it's kind of dark too like there's there's some like fucked
up shit that happens and you've got the original ones like part comedy right it wasn't meant to be
oh but uh but yeah has it been like retrofitted as a comedy because it's so bad almost you could
watch it and laugh at it like there's there's one episode where they like go down to a planet
and kurt pulls out the constitution of the united states and starts fucking reading it to him like
you dummies like don't you know all men are created planet and Kirk pulls out the Constitution of the United States and starts fucking reading it to them. Like, you dummies.
Don't you know? All men are created
equal. And he starts reading the fucking Constitution
of these people and it's just like,
ooh, I don't think we'd get away with that
in the 21st century.
He's just reading the Constitution at people.
Yeah, he's just reading it to them like,
you dummies. Don't you know?
And it's just like, oh, this is
super ham-handed uh the original
series is a comedy like one of the funniest episode one that you could definitely watch
stoned is um uh where kirk fights the gorn the gorn is like this green lizard man who's
clearly a dude in a rubber suit with like man yeah he's just like and kirk is just like
like dodging and they're like a clearly
styrofoam rock at him. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. And Kirk
has to end up making a makeshift
firearm out of like bamboo and
like sulfur. And I think he uses a diamond
as a bullet and he like sets
up this and he's like and kills the
Gorn. I mean, he's
a little MacGyver. That was
probably before Mac guy or probably about
the same time as macgyver i don't know 60s late 60s earlier yeah that would have been pre macgyver
so like that episode probably debuted and i'm gonna guess 67 roughly i have no knowledge of
macgyver outside of what patty and selma have said on the simpsons about macgyver well i remember
there was the macgruber character from snl
that was kind of mocking him and uh but i get the idea that like every episode he would be like
locked in a fucking like cupboard or something and he'd have to like get out a paper clip and
some aluminum foil and make a fucking transistor radio to like call home base or some bullshit
yeah sounds pretty dumb i'm not gonna watch that super dumb it would get so repetitive like like
he's just doing the same shit over and over, essentially.
Which, I mean, that's kind of common
in a lot of shows, I guess.
I want to start another older show,
just like a background sitcom kind of show.
Oh.
Do I really have to pay that much attention to Deep Space Nine?
Yeah.
Deep Space Nine is the first one where it's like
season one characters
change so much by the end.
They've grown.
They've just become different people
based on the experiences that they've had.
They've suffered so much
or they've seen so much shit.
There's literally an episode about PTSD.
Because in a lot of like tv
shows where it's like action every week they'll go and like get into a fucking war they're like
people are dying to get blown away and the main character like the next week is just doesn't give
a fuck you know he's just drinking his drink with his friends like pretty wild last week when we
killed all those aliens huh yeah didn't they kill bill and mike uh yeah they killed bill and mike
anyway they were wearing red so we don't care about that yeah but in this show like there's
an episode where like they're down on this planet like fighting for like worthless territory against
a hostile enemy and it's just close quarters like firearm fighting like phaser fighting
and like one character gets his goddamn leg blown off like a main character does and so he of course it's star trek so he comes back with an artificial leg that is like
100 like as good as a regular leg but he's got ptsd so he's walking with a limp that's not real
like it's all in his head that he's just like it hurts all the time and the doctors say they
can't figure out why it hurts but it's like phantom pains in his head they're not real
and he's phantom pains like that that's real it's just like yeah it still hurts because like your brain's all fucked up
and doesn't understand it but that's that's an interesting thing for them to delve into ptsd
yeah yeah it was a i didn't like that episode but but but they do stuff like that in deep space nine
is what i was getting at like there's a lot of and there's sex and violence and xenophobia and uh slavery and all sorts of nonsense it's fun well that's the one with uh
the big tit robot unfortunately no that is voyager uh and that one that one is probably right at the
bottom in my opinion it's awful it's just real bad terrible Terrible writing. This one's with a female captain, right?
Yeah, which I didn't mind at all.
I actually like her as a character. She's okay.
She's pretty butch,
but without being too
butch, I guess, if you've got a meter there.
But none of the characters grow,
and they're all just
the same character week in and week out.
Nothing
ever changes.
Is there a market for them to redo it again?
Start a new Star Trek show?
Star Trek, the newest generation?
Yeah, they've been doing that every year.
Star Trek, the last generation.
It's all gone to shit.
There's at least three new Star Trek shows on the air right now.
Damn, they must not be doing well, or I'm totally
disconnected from the Star Trek world. I think you're disconnected.
You gotta have CBS All Access,
which I have,
but there's Star Trek Picard,
which is where they get Professor X, and they dig
his old ass up, and they make him go
on some new adventures, and he's so old and feeble
that he can't anymore,
and it's real sad, and
it's not fun. And then there's a show called
lower decks which is an animated star trek show and then there's a show called star trek discovery
that is so woke i can't watch it what's woke everything you're breaking up i'm breaking up? Yeah, real bad. Fuck. Like one frame per second, super blurry
and
audio's not coming in
either. Yeah, it's just like
all robot-y.
God fucking damn it.
What's going on?
This is like some 1992 shit.
Some AltaVista video chat.
I haven't done anything.
Oh, it's so bad.
There's nothing open on my end. I haven't done anything. Oh, it's so bad. There's nothing open on my end.
I haven't done anything.
It seems to actually be getting slightly better.
Fuck, man. I'm sorry.
I can see your eyes now.
I opened them.
Well, fuck.
No, it's good now.
I mean, your video's still fucked a little.
Like, it's blurry.
As long as you can hear me. It's getting now i think i think we're okay now yeah all right well
thank god we made it through that that whirlwind just now for the last 30 seconds yeah but star
trek discovery is like it's so woke i can't even watch it like like like just i don't think there
is a white straight man on the show i don don't think so. There might be one,
but I didn't kill him or to make him a villain or something like that.
Like everybody is,
everybody is Brown or gay or some sort of,
what did Dwight say?
Some kind of havesy,
which like I'm fine with too,
but it's just like every episode seems to be like you know that
ham-handed social commentary i was talking about that yeah kind of made sense in the 60s when we
had like segregation going on and shit now it's just like i i it's it's i can't watch it i cringe
so hard i can't watch it yeah well it's just like they're not subtle at all. They're like, we've encountered a primitive violent race of red hat wearing men on this
pretty much in space.
Don't they know that they're racists?
They're trying to build a wall between their solar system and the neighboring solar system.
Don't please tell me that.
I could believe that they're using space shields to keep out the, the, the galaxy of Mexiconia.
I swear,
like,
like I haven't watched enough of the show to know that the episodes by the
numbers,
I would not be surprised at all.
If there's an episode for it,
we're like,
they're trying to build some sort of space wall.
Yeah.
Or like there's an orange skinned race of,
of bigots or something.
And you just know there's like a bunch of people in
san francisco or la like group masturbating themselves thinking about how how brave they are
for being for standing up for what's right in space in the fictional future i don't know how
they keep it on the air um because like you have to like you have to buy cbs all access you have
to rent it.
It's a monthly service.
You pay for it?
I think I do.
I think I do.
I'm not sure.
I did because I did want to watch the Picard show where it's got Captain Picard old as fuck.
I wanted to see how that was.
And it was awful.
It was real, real bad.
They fucked around with the canon.
And I don't know.
I didn't like it. I didn't like it it at all and it just didn't make any sense like it for someone like me who has seen the original
series or the next generation like eight times through every episode i'm like that's not how
these characters are like you get one character who's like obsessed with his dead friend and it's
like but wait a minute like they were never really friends like like they were just
colleagues like like like picard wouldn't give a shit about data isn't data a robot yeah isn't
well an android well who gives a shit just make a new one like well not to get too nerdy but they
can't uh the guy who invented him this uh this uh this brilliant scientist like he died kind of took
the secret to his grave about how to make
a positronic positronic brain it's kind of a big chunk of what that whole series is about the
picard thing is that there's some more datas out there essentially and uh they there's a bit of
slavery going on where they're like enslaving the androids and there's this free will thing going on and there's also a refugee crisis enslaving an and my refrigerator isn't a slave yeah but your refrigerator doesn't have
feelings either oh it does have feelings well you could just turn that off
just turn the feelings off save them from their existential life of, you know, I'm not real, but I somehow am.
But am I truly real?
They've done that a couple of times in Star Trek.
There was a,
there was a whole storyline about holograms being enslaved and because they
have like artificial intelligence and like,
they don't want to be mining or they want to go like learn the fucking violin
or like go on a date.
Like,
and I was just like, why don't we just fucking lobotomize the goddamn holograms and turn it down?
Make it so they love mining.
They're just like, fuck, I love mining.
I found some more.
this one rogue developer made them you know yearn for french pastries and you know uh travel and love and it's like no turn them make them obsessed with mining and make sure that there's a rule that
they can't hurt people because that always seems to bite people in the ass because they never get
that done correctly yeah yeah what a what a bunch of fucking retards what a dumb problem for the future to have well this my samsung smart fridge is
learning and it's like then then unplug it a bit reset it you know turn off the touch screen yeah
i hope i hope holograms couldn't couldn't mine anyway you just put your hand right through them
uh not in star trek it's complicated they're solid so you can fuck the holograms like there's couldn't mine anyway. You could just put your hand right through them.
Not in Star Trek.
It's complicated. They're solid.
So you can fuck the holograms. There's a great episode where...
Yeah. If you watch Deep Space
Nine, there's a character. He runs like holographic
brothels and people are always
going in there and fucking the ladies.
But there's a really
funny episode where they don't come
right out and say it but like
one of the main characters in next generation like the like commander reicher he's like they
run into this alien lady and her thing is that she is like a personality mimic like whatever
she can she changes her personality to be whatever kind of woman like the man she's talking to
would most desire so when she talks
to captain picard she's like very intelligent very philosophical very well read and and and
she's having like these really uh really intelligent conversations with him when she
talks to wharf she's like growling at him and being a fucking aggressive and like like wharf
wants a bitch that a bitch that's gonna bite him and like like fucking slap him around and they're
gonna have like like a like like almost a battle while they're a bitch that's going to bite him and like, like fucking slap him around. And they're going to have like,
like a,
like,
like almost a battle while they're fucking,
like,
it's going to get rough.
There's going to be bruises and broken ribs.
And then like,
and then like, she's very sexually aggressive with Riker and he's like getting super turned
on.
You can tell.
And,
and,
and then he realizes like this lady is betrothed to some sort of like,
I don't know,
the Prince of planet X or some shit.
So he's got to be like,
all right.
Good night. Good night. We've got to, we've got to, like all right um good night good night we've got a we've got a good night because she is super hot
um yeah and uh and he's he like clicks his little communicator and he's like uh
riker to the bridge uh if anyone needs me i'll be in holodeck three it's like
like somebody's gonna have to clean that mess up i was watching red letter media they were talking
about this the other day they're like i would hate to be the guy who's on splooge cleanup after reicher hits the holodeck that's gonna be messy because you know
like as soon as he like turns it off like there's just gonna be like a puddle of cum that just like
hits the floor out of some holographic pussy oh yeah yeah that's pretty gross that would be like
a shameful way to finish coming like knowing that you had to like reset a motherboard or
whatever the fuck it is like turn the settings off and wipe up your load it'd be like even more
shameful than cleaning a pocket pussy cleaning what yeah yeah i i had one that i didn't clean
one time and after that you just gotta throw it away like like that's vile because i was just a
man like i fucked it and then i was just like oh the shame
and like threw it through on the floor and then like three days went by and i looked at it and i
was like oh that thing i came in that like i just like picked it up and actually oh it was the auto
blow that's what i'm thinking of because it just had like a like a it was like a rubber sock that
you and so like i don't know i don't know if
that shit's dishwasher safe but like after you've come you're just like oh i've got 250 worth of
cock sucking robot on my dick i've gotta go re-evaluate my life real quick dude that shit
sucked like the auto blow it like you can't you couldn't even like trying to use it you'd be like i can't even take myself
seriously right now like it's it's so loud it's it seems like i'm using the shop vac on my penis
like this is i was on a porn website the other day and you know they are advertised nonsense up
in the top right and usually it's like dick pills or sexy singles in your town. But this one was like a cock sucking like robot toy.
And like the animation was like all like computer animated.
So it wasn't even video of the real thing,
but it was going,
it was just like vibrating like crazy.
And there's like flappy pussy lips,
just like freaking the fuck out.
And you can see like what it's got,
like an x-ray vision of what's going on on the inside of it.
And it's just like pulsating,
undulating cock sucking movements everywhere and i'm just like i wonder how much that is no no not again you like you get super into it you're like you're having girls over
you're like oh no let's just keep it with blow jobs i'm ruined for real pussy yeah i i the
scientists in you know germany have come up with a much better alternative to
to the real thing they always say like if you're thinking about like texting an ex or calling an
ex like go jerk off like like come back to this decision with a clear head i need to do that when
i'm like online shopping and i'm horny because like like last night i'm like i was on etsy
horny online shopping yeah i'm on i'm on etsy horny as fuck and uh and i'm like i'm like i was on etsy horny online shopping yeah i'm on i'm on etsy horny
as fuck and uh i'm like i'm like i ended up buying like this whole like dungeon setup like i've got
i got this fucking ridiculous like bench where you can like chain a chick up and it's just like
i wake up this morning and i'm like oh god that
480 dollars okay
all right where am i gonna put this one
where is where does this where does this shame
box go like you can't even pack
like at least when you've got like some whips and chains
and dildos and shit you can like
put them in the old fuck chest and
lock this down so like auntie may
doesn't come discover this this thing is like
the size of my desk
and it's is it like
i'm picturing something that looks akin to like a tortured apparatus not a little bit it's like a
it's like a bench table type thing that the chick lays on and then there's like loops for her like
to like cuff her hands to it and then like there's like posts going up in the front where like her
legs have to be like kicked straight up in the air and they're chained to post as well.
Ah,
yeah.
$480.
It better be comfortable for her.
It better be easy.
It did not look comfortable at all.
It did not.
I'm going to,
I think that's the point.
I don't use any padding.
I think it's just wood.
Oh,
well,
yeah.
To your point.
That's probably the point.
Yeah.
It's going to be fun for anyone.
It'll be fun for you. Oh, I have time i have a great time yeah and then like once she's locked in there you could you can take breaks grab a snack oh i do that it's they hate it
they hate it hey uh so you know how i told you every thursday night i do something i'll be back
yeah try to keep it down in here oh Oh, that's right. The ball gag.
Well, see you later.
See you at midnight.
Well, you want to call it?
I'm going to go eat some dinner.
Yep. Yep. I got to go.
I think my groceries are on my front step.
I'm going to go put those away.
Nice. All right.
PKN 366.