Painkiller Already - PKN 396

Episode Date: March 23, 2022

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Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 PKN 396. How you doing, boys? Not bad. Not bad. It's in my head, but it felt like a longer gap from PKA to today. Like it's been a while. Did you miss me? I guess so. Oh, how sweet.
Starting point is 00:00:13 It is genuinely weird, though, like when we miss an episode, and I'm sure it feels the same for you guys, where it's like, man, it feels like eons since I've been stupid online, and it's only like 10 days but it's a fun habit i love doing the show so kyle you've been obsessed with the war man it's been so continuing it it's you know it feels what's happened since pretend i haven't looked at it at all yeah um pretend i've been looking at i don don't know, something, a waste of time, magic deck layouts. So the things that have actually happened,
Starting point is 00:00:51 so the overall thing is that the Russians are still stuck. They're not making any progress, and they're still shooting their, like, dumb bombs that aren't, like, laser-guided or anything, just blowing up. Can I jump in? Lots of stuff yeah so i've heard that the hypersonic missiles they got all that attention for shooting
Starting point is 00:01:09 might not have actually been used that it was just a bluff or they wanted credit for doing it but they didn't a little um well i i saw the reports of them supposedly doing it um and then like two or three days later the russians said they did it I don't think it matters if they did or not. We know they have the weapons, and they have used them before. It's a weapon that doesn't make any sense to use here, because the main advantage of this hypersonic
Starting point is 00:01:36 weapons is to carry a nuclear warhead, or to carry some sort of aircraft carrier, like a ship destroying missile. The point is it can't really really be countered because it's going so fast. Is that the video where it was like a Russian ship and they're like, they're testing their hyper, you know,
Starting point is 00:01:53 missile or whatever. So what I'm talking about is it maybe is that missile, but like Kyle said, the missile goes so fast that it's almost impossible to prevent from hitting its target. The trouble is in Ukraine, they don't really have any counter missile defense systems protecting the maternity ward of some children's hospital. So they don't need to use that weapon to shoot buildings. Yeah. Seems like that's more of a threat showing like, hey, NATO, we're a real country with the real military.
Starting point is 00:02:24 Check out what we can do from the atlantic to london in four minutes or whatever number they funny you said that because some people are saying they're trying to get credit for shooting these missiles at like buildings in a spot where you wouldn't want to waste such an expensive missile without actually doing that and i saw i saw, so you, you wouldn't have seen the video of it. Cause I've only seen one video that supposedly is a hypersonic missile. And it looked fake to me.
Starting point is 00:02:53 Okay. If you saw the video I'm talking about, you'd be like, Oh, what the fuck is that? Cause it's going so fast that it looks like something from a sci-fi movie. It sort of just like goes over their head and then it's gone. Like, like most of the cruise missiles that people see,
Starting point is 00:03:07 it's like, oh, look at that. And it's just like... Like a jet almost. Yeah, a lot of them are subsonic. But yeah, it seems like things have really bogged down. It doesn't matter if they shot a supersonic missile or not. They have them. They've had them for some time.
Starting point is 00:03:23 Yeah, it seems like using it in this context to be like yeah killing a moth with a cannon so i don't deny they have them i guess they do but it's just a little bit to me it plays into the role of their myth of the 10-foot russian you know if people haven't heard that term before it's this idea that the soviet union was our equal in terms of being a global superpower that they have nearly as many jets and tanks and carriers and this and that as we do. And then when they try to take out Ukraine, they're all out of gas and stabbing their own fuel tanks and getting fucked. And so this now we're using our top weapons against these buildings is kind of like we're still 10 foot tall. Are you?
Starting point is 00:04:04 I don't know well have the peace talks gone anywhere i know they've had a number of those now yeah and obviously like i remember a few weeks ago both sides doing like start from a high anchor point with their negotiation both like we require unconditional surrender and it's like well let's move more towards the middle there hopefully stop the fighting has that moved at all yeah yeah it seems like um they're definitely going somewhere toward the middle like i was talking about where what's probably going to happen is it's good russia's going to keep um a lot of a lot of stuff in the east and maybe even the south
Starting point is 00:04:37 and then they're going to have to promise they'll never join nato and maybe they'll meet somewhere in the middle there but um it depends what Russia wants. Russia is going to have to agree to something eventually because this thing isn't going to get any better, any faster. It really has ground to a halt. And it seems like there's a lot more weapons on the way. I don't know. They've lost so many tanks. When you say weapons on the way, is this the Russiansians sending more weapons or the ukrainians getting more defensive weapons the ukrainians getting a lot more defensive weapons from from
Starting point is 00:05:08 the newer um german anti-tank weapons to all of the u.s drones that just got there we don't they weren't specific about about um they sent those like switchblade drones uh but they weren't specific about which size they sent i think there's two or three sizes um this is this little bitty fucking drone if it's the little one that you like shoot out of some little bullshit cannon and this thing can like just fly around and they call it a kamikaze shoot it's uh it's a missile that you that kind of loiters in the air for a long period of time and then you fly it right into like a single use drone yeah it's a missile um and uh the they are, the more damage they do.
Starting point is 00:05:46 That seems hard to fuck up. I think the little one is like a single-use explosion that you'd blow up a group of guys hiding in a hole with or something. Maybe a tank. Not a tank. Don't give anyone in Ukraine over 30 the controls
Starting point is 00:06:01 to the destruction of the little machines. You're completely right. We need gamers. We need zoomers. We need younger millennials. Do not give this don't be like, hey, you're 58. You gotta go back and fight on the front line.
Starting point is 00:06:17 Things need to be controlled by an Xbox controller. Get XCAL back on this thing. He'll be getting headshots with it that's who we need i saw um i saw they caught a male and female looter a riot um at at uh at a dead ukrainian soldier's house and they tied him to a fucking tree and pulled their pants down and they were whipping this man and woman's ass so severely they were screaming their ass was just red it was just a red blur where their ass goes uh i've saw so many apparently like that's the thing they do there
Starting point is 00:06:56 and and like should we adopt that should we adopt spanking looters and taping them to polls it's so widespread that it must be like a ukrainian custom it's like oh we caught it like you you wake up and you look out the window and there's some guy tied up to a tree bare ass you're like ah steve you've been stealing again like you just know like i guess is it christmas already and it's so funny because like they're always tied up with similar stuff it's either zip ties or saran wrap that's terrific i'm seeing a lot of very difficult photos of like like you know that horrible brown packing tape like that packaging tape that you need so much of it turns out it takes a comical amount of that to keep an adult man on a pole and so like the zip ties you'd
Starting point is 00:07:46 see like you know a reasonable amount of zip ties this dude was forehead to toes just just totally taped up oh yeah i think i was like get it out of there i uh i think i made the i think i maybe we even bet i don't know people keep up with this sort of thing about um i think i've said that trump's going to be the next president uh like maybe a year or so ago and man that just looks like so and so more likely they heard i'm seeing you put some money down listening they said that trump's pack has more money than the entire republican and democratic party combined they said leave it what are like the vegas odds Trump right now? Cause you know, so many people in 2016 made boat.
Starting point is 00:08:27 I don't need them to tell me that Donald Trump is going to be the next president. And then you got like, like every time they're, they keep trying to like go after Trump legally. And every time it just seems to fail. And, and if,
Starting point is 00:08:38 and once he's candid Trump, they'll drop, they'll drop all that stuff, or at least they'll put it off. And if he wins, they'll just drop it. He'll be president for four more years. And I think he will.
Starting point is 00:08:46 God damn it. Trump's the favorite to bet on, so you won't even make a huge amount of money. He's going to. Dude, Biden cannot speak. And Kamala went over to Europe to lay things down. Hey, we got a real big thing going on. Don't worry. Big USA, we're behind you.
Starting point is 00:09:04 Apparently, it caused so much worry in Europe from Kamala's visit that Biden is going now. Biden is going like 10 days after her on the same fucking trip. We don't know. All we saw other than speak to leaders, but when you saw her speak, oh my God. She's as bad as him off the cuff. She's repeating these- I can't remember what the phrase is that she repeated three times. Yeah, I saw her speak. Oh my God. She's as bad as him off the cuff. She's like repeating these. Like, I can't remember what the phrase is that she read.
Starting point is 00:09:28 Yeah. I saw that clip. She was like, there is certainly a significance to the passing of time. There is the passing of time. Carrie signet. I saw that little clip, but like,
Starting point is 00:09:38 she's not dumb and she's not, um, she's a bad speaker. Is this problem there? She's, she's not a good speaker and she, and she certainly didn't inspire confidence didn't inspire confidence in the leaders that she went over there and spoke to. And Biden's not going to be able to do any better because he's literally diminished. It's in Iraq.
Starting point is 00:09:55 I had I didn't know what Sky News was like. Like, are they right wing, left wing, the right wing for sure? Because I saw. But but it is foreign press and i saw him do this whole thing like uh talking about biden and the embarrassment that he is and then they like played this clip and it wasn't one of those montages that you might see on youtube of him just messing up on a word and then because those are often taken out of context because when you speak a lot of words on camera like you're gonna fuck up a small percentage and after a while it adds up like
Starting point is 00:10:25 i get it right it was just him like trying to do one thing it was just like here's an unedited clip of joe biden trying to talk to human beings go and it's just like man he is struggling for a while and then i saw an unrelated one today because i was like looking at more sky news stuff trying to determine their right wing left wing thing again I don't know if I've already said, very much right-wing. But they played another clip of Biden and he had forgotten who the prime minister of Australia was. I don't know it either.
Starting point is 00:10:53 Okay, okay. I got you. I got you. I feel you. I don't know it off the top of my head either. But I'm not president. Also, also, I'm not right in the middle of some Australia business, right?
Starting point is 00:11:04 Like if I went, hey, Taylor, who's the chancellor of some Australia business. Right. Like, like if I went, Hey, Hey Taylor, who's the chancellor of Bulgaria. And you didn't know. It'd be like, yeah, I get it,
Starting point is 00:11:11 man. I don't even know what they've got there. Greg, they might have a King there for all I know. But if you were right, it sounds real, doesn't it? Trade negotiations with Bulgaria.
Starting point is 00:11:21 And like the prime minister of Bulgariagaria is in the room with you and like you've been dealing with him all week and he's just like i just want to really thank the man this that really brought all this together and that's uh that fellow from down under right there that fellow from down under right there thank you champ hold on That's funny. But I think Trump looks better off camera. I think removing him from social media has aided Trump, that the memory of Trump is better than the reality of Trump was. And I have a quote. They asked Trump what he would do if he was president right now in the Ukraine situation. And here it is, word for word.
Starting point is 00:12:03 Well, what I would do is I would, we would, we would have tremendous military capability. And what we can do without planes, to be honest with you, without 44-year-old jets, what we can do is enormous. And we should be doing it. And we should be helping them to survive. And they're doing an amazing job. This doesn't answer the question. It just runs off. I disagree you because i i read that in his voice and i was like why are these people so biased like i can hear it in his voice he made perfect perfect sense there they're like they're like they're like he's saying if i were president we'd be doing a lot more and i'm not talking about with those 40 year old jets those migs
Starting point is 00:12:40 that everybody's trying to like get in the hands of Ukrainians. I'm talking about with American sixth-generation firepower. That's what we have. But they're fighting hard, and they're doing things well. Then I still don't like that. Him talking big, amping up how much we need to be involved in this conflict. It could very easily become a global problem. He said we should paint Chinese flags on our planes and bomb Russia. That is insane.
Starting point is 00:13:07 It's the Chinese. That is the dumbest thing I've ever heard in my life. He said that. He did say that. That's retarded. What you have to wonder is like. Good God, that's retarded. What a dangerous thing to do.
Starting point is 00:13:23 The whole world is antagonized Russia and China like that. What do you mean antagonized? It's starting World War III. Yeah, it would start World War III. It sounds... God, I hope it was a joke. Jesus. I really hope it was a joke. I think he said that to a fundraiser or something,
Starting point is 00:13:33 or to add a fundraiser or something. It's not an appropriate joke for someone in Donald Trump's position to make. Yeah, I agree. When did he make it to? I didn't even know that. I'm not going to defend it. I just want to know more about it. If I say six days into the war, I agree. When did he make it to? I didn't even know that. I'm not going to defend it. I just want to know more about it. If I say six days into the war, I'm close.
Starting point is 00:13:48 I doubt he was joking. Oh, if he said it recently, then it's very defendable. I thought it was when he was the president. I thought he was president of the United States, and he was like, hey, why can't we just paint their flag on our plane and go on in there and just get our enemies to fight each other? No, this was him at a fundraiser or something saying, why don't we
Starting point is 00:14:08 try this? It doesn't matter either way. I've allowed you to pull me into whataboutism anyway, and I should have stopped that immediately because who fucking cares about Donald Trump and what Donald Trump does and how he speaks? The President of the United States is Joe Biden. I didn't pull you into whataboutism. You launched with Trump does and how he speaks. The president of the United States is Joe Biden. And that's who I'm going to talk about.
Starting point is 00:14:25 I didn't pull you into whataboutit. You launched with Trump is definitely going to be the next president. And I said, well, this is what Trump is really like. And I don't like the term whataboutit. It seems like when people say that, they just don't like that they're being forced to reconcile two
Starting point is 00:14:41 irreconcilable things. You know what I mean? No, i was laughing i totally i don't even give trump the credit of like that being a joke like i i bet he was like talking big being serious and not realizing or maybe realizing you know because i'm sure a lot of his donors are like neocon pro, you know, getting as involved in the conflict as possible. Trump sometimes floats ideas. I'm sorry to cut you off, Kyle. Go ahead. That aren't good ones and shouldn't be held against him so much.
Starting point is 00:15:13 Right. Trump was like, maybe we should buy Greenland. Right. Okay. Apparently that's a stupid idea. But to be honest, I didn't hate it. Hate it. What happens if we did?
Starting point is 00:15:23 How much is Greenland? Let's talk. I don't know. Maybe it's a piece of valuable did how much is greenland let's talk i don't know maybe it's a piece of valuable property that'd be good for him i don't know um trump said what happens if we nuke a hurricane okay turns out that's stupid also i've wondered that who among us hasn't been curious for that he really should have googled it first the best part is the same youtube channel that does hey what would happen if we nuked a hurricane There's a YouTube channel for that. He really should have Googled it first. The best part is the same YouTube channel that does,
Starting point is 00:15:49 hey, what would happen if we nuked a hurricane? Has like eight other videos. What if we nuked this, that, and the other? And it was going to answer like three more of his questions that night. He was going to want to nuke the Marianas Trench after that. He was going to create another Panama Canal canal i saw an incredible youtube video talking about bombing a hurricane and after that i saw the incredible physics involved in a slam dunk you're not gonna believe this folks so i guess trump asked questions that other presidents
Starting point is 00:16:20 wouldn't have asked but it wasn't like he was about to take action on them and they should be viewed through that lens and that's where i put the paint chinese flag on american planes nonsense you know that's that's so if i were president i would be like i'd be like i would ask questions like hey hey what's the maximum range of our missiles like could we actually shoot the moon like i'm not gonna but like if i wanted to like shoot a nuke at the moon could i and then they'd be like president myers wanted to nuke the moon it's like i mean no i didn't want to well i mean i kind of first of all yeah i do want to nuke the moon new york times thanks for printing it just like that i heard there's a chinese flag on it can't have that like who doesn't i don't't want to hurt anybody, but last I heard, nobody lives there,
Starting point is 00:17:07 and I got all these nukes, like almost 5,000 of them now. That would solidify the space race, just like pulling up the ladder after us. Did you nuke the moon? No one else can go. The Russians, two things about the space race. The Russians pulled Yuri whatever the fuck, the first man in space, off of the- Yuri Gagarin? Yeah, they like
Starting point is 00:17:25 Whitewashed him off the wall or whatever Are you serious that is the dumbest thing I've ever heard I think it's because he's like Anti-Ukraine right now or something Right now Yuri Gagarin is dead No no no He's a very public figure You're talking about the first man in space
Starting point is 00:17:41 Yeah He's dead Well the first man that they claim I'm very confused The first man in space? Yeah. He's dead. Well, the first man that they claim. I'm very confused. The first man in space is definitely dead. Yeah, he didn't live, right? On reentry. Yeah, he's that crit.
Starting point is 00:17:53 Yuri Gagarin is the guy who, like all the Soviets, were standing around his shriveled, burnt up corpse. Well, then the one that lived. He wasn't the first guy in space. That is Elon Musk. Yuri Gagarin is the one who has that cool statue that looks like retro. I'm going to look up his name.
Starting point is 00:18:08 Yeah, Yuri died. They're getting rid of Yuri. What did he do other than go to space first? He didn't invade Ukraine. There wasn't a Ukraine when he was doing that, was there? Well, the land was there. Well, yeah, but I mean like nationally I'm talking about. The first man to go to space apparently was john
Starting point is 00:18:26 glenn it's irrelevant um they they they took some uh spaceman off the wall because of some some ukraine thing but but the other thing there's a tv show that i haven't gotten into yet i think it might be on apple tv there's a whole slew of things getting rid of a guy who died in 1968 first man in space whitewashing him that's absurd um oh they have a they have a show about like what if the space race had continued um it had if it hadn't ended with sort of the first moon landing because you know kind of petered out there were like maybe half a dozen more moon landings or something like that after that and then it kind of petered out but uh i think the the show like is in the 80s maybe or the 90s when we're like colonizing the moon or maybe in fighting on the moon like like it uh it
Starting point is 00:19:14 looks pretty cool i can't remember what it's called it's like maybe for all mankind or one small step something like that do guns work in space yeah i can't think of any reason why they wouldn't work i was gonna ask was going to ask the same question. I'm worried about the flame, the spark. Does the strike do its job? When you hit the back of a bullet, does it explode without oxygen? Oh, yeah. Yeah, you've got oxidizers in there.
Starting point is 00:19:38 That's what I thought. As far as I know, there's no reason why the gun shouldn't work just fine in space. Because they work underwater. Yeah, they do. You don't need air. Yeah, they should work in a vacuum just fine. So I don't see why they wouldn't work in outer fucking space. Would you want normal bullets?
Starting point is 00:19:56 Like what would be more ideal in space? I don't know specifically. If you're asking me, Taylor, Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu would be more entertaining. I would like to see that. I was leaning towards lasers. I'm going towards weightless grappling. Why would lasers be better? Because my understanding from TV is that there is infinite ammo.
Starting point is 00:20:18 Touche. But you're going to need a big battery pack somewhere, right? No, no, no. I've seen the same TV shows. That's not true. I wouldn't be surprised if it does have some application, but I would think it would be more to blind your enemies. I think you'd have to hold it very accurately for a long period of time,
Starting point is 00:20:34 like a magnifying glass until it burned through your spaceship. Well, those naval guns. The Russians brought real guns. The Russians have guns. Don't fire until you see the reds of your eyes. Everyone shine at that one. All we're doing is keeping them warm. The Russians brought guns and mirrors.
Starting point is 00:20:58 We're fucked. Have you seen the naval laser cannons they've got? The U.S. Navy's laser cannons they've got uh like the u.s u.s navy's uh laser cannon gun tell me about them yeah it's wild it is not a like oh look it's warming them up it's it's like they go three two one and then it explodes a boat like it's how long do they have to hold it on there or it's just no it goes boom and like is it from the heat of the laser what that's horrifying yeah and i remember that the video i watched was them showing north koreans this who had like escaped north korea so they're borderline cave people like they just found out
Starting point is 00:21:39 about like coca-cola like a week ago and uh and so then they show him a laser cannon the natural progression and at first they're like well yeah that's a big cannon you got there but we have big cannons in russia and they're like no no that's a beam of fucking light and they're like oh no they're like that was just a beam of light he's like so it's just instant and they're like yeah yeah and you've got all the ammo you could ever you don't run out of ammo they're like yeah it costs a dollar a shot but we're charging a thousand um those things are wild no i don't see any reason why you would just want a gun just want like like whatever gun that you would want here. Just a gun gun.
Starting point is 00:22:27 I don't know. A submachine gun or a rifle. I watched a quick video on the system Kyle talked about. And basically they took out a drone. It works like a laser pointer. And you just get it on the drone and then it fell out of the sky. They've got different ones. The one I saw is huge.
Starting point is 00:22:42 There's one where it goes into goes into like uh one of the cargo planes it's such a long like mechanism the laser thing whatever that is i don't know how lasers work uh and then uh the one on the ship was real big too and it was shooting at like a floating target um of like steel plates like floating out in the ocean that's what it might have been the same one although the one i think the one i saw is like half the size of a car i don't know what huge is maybe no this looks huge i mean it was mounted on like a battleship or something like that it looked like one of their bigger i don't know the rest of their cannons i don't know anything about naval guns either they're pretty big yeah i mean the the the one i shot is the smallest of naval guns that the the bofors uh cannon thing is that the one
Starting point is 00:23:25 with you in the meme yeah yeah yeah but no war has been fucking ridiculous um they're saying 10 000 russians dead that's a number that's looking more and more likely uh because the ukrainian number is like 17 000 now the russian number is like 800 maybe a thousand and like the u.s intelligence number is getting much closer to like 10,000 now. So that's a lot of dead Russians. That's a lot of dead Russians. And I keep hearing like about different things that they're doing with the bodies, how they're like sending them to Belarus first.
Starting point is 00:23:58 And then like from there, they're sending them back, how they're a cremating them in some instances. Cause, cause the biggest how they're cremating them in some instances. Because the biggest lie they're telling right now is the guys who are dead and or MIA or POWs, they're quickly fixing the paperwork to make it seem like, oh, those weren't Russian soldiers. Those are, well, yeah, that's Yuri. He doesn't work for the army. What are you doing?
Starting point is 00:24:23 Yuri, what are you doing over there in that uniform? Why are they doing that? Because now they didn't lose a soldier. Now just some Russian guy went over to Ukraine and got lost. He must have. Darn it to heck. They do that all the time. There was that group of Russians that were like,
Starting point is 00:24:39 they're making us sign a paper that says, we're not Russian soldiers, that we quit three weeks ago. We've been in this barn for two days. We're in Ukraine. I'm wearing a uniform. Wait, but why are those guys getting kicked out? Are they not dead? They're not getting kicked out.
Starting point is 00:24:57 They're signing fake paperwork so that if they die, they'll have it on hand. Okay. They've been abandoned in so many situations, right? Because of the logistic situations. There's just guys out on their own there's guys that just walked away from their dude if i was in one of those tanks and like maybe there's eight of us together all of us tank buddies and like seven of the other tanks got shot by some psychopath with a million dollar american missile and they're just popping them off like candy over there because america i'm getting the fuck out of this.
Starting point is 00:25:27 First of all. Did you know Russian tanks don't have heaters or air conditioning? Not heaters? Do you know how cold it is over there? Oh, it's probably freezing. You're right. Oh, I'm sorry. They do have heaters.
Starting point is 00:25:37 The problem is you have to take running to run the heater. And tanks are like the least fuel economic vehicle on the planet. It's a tank. It's the last concern they have. Like on the checklist of things that you want to tank. It should be on the list, it seems, but okay. It must be the last. It's just last.
Starting point is 00:25:56 They're heavier. They're like, sir, it gets 60 miles to the gallon, but it's a Volvo. It's the Prius. Yeah. I would get out of my shit and i'd walk away and then i'd be i'd just be one more like russian tank and we'd be me and my two or three buddies would be off in the woods somewhere you probably know this that happened in iraq a lot so um in iraq americans figured out that they could take out tanks with their air power right previously they thought it was tank to tank whatever and they're like oh my gosh these tanks show up on i'm making it up but you know the black and white and they show up as white maybe that's infrared or maybe that's
Starting point is 00:26:33 something okay they show up on the infrared really really well because the tanks cool at a different rate than the sand does so at night it's just like, bam, there's the tanks. And the jets were taking them out so easily. They called it tank plinking, which is a little casual about what's happening here. You're killing eight men inside of a tank and it's just plink, plink, plink, but
Starting point is 00:26:57 that is the nature of air battles. I think it's 4-5. The racks, I think, had T-64s. I watched a whole long thing about Operation Desert Storm the other day, and I almost messaged you. I don't get too specific, but the person you know who was in a tank over there, I wanted to know, like, which battalion or whatever, which, like, tank army he was with because they were like, and then the third tank battalion led by colonel striker went over the hill and like that's a cool general name dude it was so cool to go through and see you know two things his rank and his name
Starting point is 00:27:36 as soon as i named my son colonel he'd be the best general the world has ever seen. General Colonel Sunstriker. Iraqis apparently left their tanks because they saw them as just big billboards to kill here. It would make sense that the Russians do that now, too. Yeah, a lot of
Starting point is 00:28:02 them were... They killed so many of those Iraqis on that road. It was wild. It was wild. I saw this one instance where there was this Republican guard defended position and it had trenches. It had trenches in the front. They had trenches in the front, and instead of getting out of our tanks and fighting those Iraqis in the trenches, those hardline Republican guards guys, they sent forward the army bulldozer tanks and just bulldozed over the trench long ways and buried a few hundred Iraqis alive and just kept going. They're like, they're in the trench, sir.
Starting point is 00:28:46 They won't come out. Yeah, send the bulldozers. Yeah, yeah. Bury them all. And they just did. Just buried them all and kept going. Goodness. And they can't leave because they don't have an air force and America does. They can't leave. They buried them alive in the sand. No, no, I'm saying they couldn't flee the trench. It would be very hard to kill
Starting point is 00:29:02 me by steamroller because I feel like I can dodge a steamroller. Oh, no, those tanks don't imagine that they're like that guy in austin powers no 100 yards away i don't know where to go yeah that thing was one and then the american tanks had had thermal sites and there was a big sandstorm. And the Iraqis are literally like looking through a crosshair trying to like see an American tank. And just in every instance where American tanks and Iraqi tanks shot at each other, that it was really fun to watch the video because they were like 87 Iraqi vehicles were destroyed. No American vehicles were lost. And they're like and then they radioed back and the general was amazed. So he said, keep going. And so they did.
Starting point is 00:29:48 And every instance, they just completely won without taking any casualties whatsoever. I don't know if the Iraqis ever shot an American tank. It was all friendly fire. Every few minutes, it'd be like, then the Americans shot the Brits for the third time that day.
Starting point is 00:30:04 And that's when the brits decided they were no longer going to have the americans on their left flank and they made a hard right toward kuwait city at one point the brits had to like tear away and get the fuck away from yeah you have my apologies good call blah blah yeah do you ever like read those because you know on like oh go ahead they hoisted their flags on the tanks. At this point, the Brits had been friendly fired four times that day. So every British vehicle and tank hoisted the Union Jack and headed east. Good call.
Starting point is 00:30:39 Look at that. It's our ally, the Confederates. Oh, man. Have you ever seen that like meme it was like someone took a picture of a union jack and they're like just just disgusted by the racism in my neighborhood and it's like that's not what you think it is but uh you know how they have those summations of battles like on wikipedia and stuff where it'll say the forces? Do you ever go to like, or have you ever seen the really lopsided ones? Like the Australian war against
Starting point is 00:31:12 the Emu war, where the Australians tried to defeat a bunch of Emus and there was decisive Emu victory. And Emu is a very tall, flightless bird, right? It is. And they roundly defeated Australia. There's been a couple instances where they tried to exterminate them.
Starting point is 00:31:29 And for a number of reasons, it was a complete failure. And there was always more emus, but the army kept wasting lots of money. And I think there were actually some injuries and maybe even a death along the way. Look, you get that many men out there in machines and you send them to go do a thing. Somebody falls off, gets ran over or whatever. So there are casualties in the emu war. I hope there are more casualties on the emu side. I mean, there's
Starting point is 00:31:52 casualties in the war against gingivitis. Shit happens, right? Don't be afraid of gingivitis, though. I mean, brush, but you know. There's an article about the emu war with the subsections where it's like the battle itself and then the bottom section is defeat talking about how they could not eradicate
Starting point is 00:32:14 the emus and they're like and we're frankly confused why they'd want to the emu is on the coat of arms of australia like but anyway the other one i was thinking of was i think it was like the british fighting the zulu in like yes that was the example i was gonna give you yeah and it was like and it shows the like stats and you read it and it's like well the the british brought 300 men with guns and the zulu brought 11 000 men primarily primarily armed with hide shields and spears and it's like before you even read further you're like this is going to go poorly and like the it's thousands of dead Zulu
Starting point is 00:32:52 and I think it was what like 32 dead 8 wounded or something I figured there were 300 dead no they literally won it was like a massacre because they you know you're fighting someone who doesn't have guns well it's not just that. This is a real famous story.
Starting point is 00:33:08 What kind of guns did they have? If it's a lever action, I see how they could do really well. If it's a musket, wow. So they had bolt action rifles, real high power. They might have been those 303 ones, but don't quote me on that. But they're not magazine fed. I believe you have to take the round and put it in the gun and close the bolt and then fire. That's my memory of those rifles from a movie that I watched over and over as a kid called Zulu.
Starting point is 00:33:38 My historical knowledge of this event is based on that movie. After this, I'll explain 300. Yeah but i'm pretty sure i'll explain 300 yeah i'm pretty sure they nailed it um okay so like a few weeks prior um the zulu had wiped out a much much larger british force in the open um they they had overwhelmed them and swarmed them um and uh and so from that force they had captured a number of rifles maybe maybe a couple hundred rifles they're using those rifles to fire at the mission down below from the hilltops and it was a mission um commanded by a couple of officers in the movie one of them's played by uh who's batman's butler alfred oh alfred my bad lost a wine who plays alfred
Starting point is 00:34:22 what who plays michael cain michael cain i didn't know if it was a trick i didn't want to answer My bad. Lost a wine. Who plays Alfred? Who plays Alfred? Michael Caine. Michael Caine. I didn't know. It was a trick. I didn't want to answer. Yeah, so very, very young Michael Caine is in this blonde-haired Michael Caine. That's how old the movie is.
Starting point is 00:34:35 And basically, they just defend this mission over the course of several days from wave after wave of Zulu. wave of Zulu and they like set up those firing lines where you got like guys in the front kneeling and standing behind a Line behind them standing and a line behind them on an elevated position and you've got like a commander going line one Line two and like now now line ones reloading right and line two is firing now and so it's just like And the Zulu are coming from every direction and like they're coming from behind us now and like it gets hand to hand so there's bayonets and spear fighting and the fucking officers are pulling out
Starting point is 00:35:13 their six shooters and stuff it's it's a fun movie and they kill so many black people that after a while you're like whew this is why they occasionally mix in a few different races these days in movies, right? Because it looks bad after you kill the 8,000th black man.
Starting point is 00:35:31 I mean, it would be very confusing if they sprinkled in a bunch of redheads or a Japanese guy. Yeah, it'd be like, would it, Taylor? Would it be confusing if in a period piece you introduced a race that shouldn't really be there by any means or i'm watching a movie about the zulu and it's some scottish looking guy like all right let's go i'm mcgumby the leader of the zulu no no no be like this movie sucks and i'm not watching it so like one of the one of the key parts that movie is the chant the
Starting point is 00:35:59 zulu do you can there's so many of them that they're stomping and when they hit those spears it's like thunder and they have this chant it and when they hit those spears, it's like thunder, and they have this chant. It's like, I can't do it, but it's like, Oh, Oh, and when you hear thousands of them doing it, it's incredibly intimidating. Just bagpipes
Starting point is 00:36:17 pop in at the back of it. Just, What the fuck? That's right. That's right great i'm here to defend my homeland oh i imagined him as like a rogue scotsman who's had enough of the brits and he's joining all zulu and one scottish guy so let me tell you about a show that i watched in one sitting yesterday called vikings valhalla which is the which is the sequel to the v you about a show that I watched in one sitting yesterday called Vikings Valhalla, which is the sequel to the Vikings TV show that you guys may have gotten into, maybe not about Thor Ragnarok, or Thor Ragnarsson, I think was his name.
Starting point is 00:36:55 And, you know, it's like four or five seasons. You follow Ragnarsson and his kids, and it was real good, especially the early season. So they did a sequel to that. First season came out. Kattegat was the main city that Ragnar was running and everything. It was the capital of Vikingdom, almost, it seemed. When you get to this 100 years later, the leader of Kattegat is a black woman
Starting point is 00:37:25 there's a there's a black the the the the viking jarl which is like their king is a black is a black woman now she she runs the city oh just like in history yeah and then i was like oh that makes sense and then like her like and then she's got like a bunch of like lady badasses who are like the only ones i guess who like defend um defend the Viking stronghold at home now. It's all women. So it's not a Viking show anymore. It was so silly. I completely pushed that aside.
Starting point is 00:37:55 And I was just like, every time they went back to the black lady who runs the Viking fucking kingdom, I'm just like... That doesn't make any sense. No, it didn't make any sense at all. That takes you out of it. you're watching a period piece historically like why like it doesn't make any sense i i started googling in the end and like not only that but they apparently the person that
Starting point is 00:38:16 this is named after is like a real viking person who was a white man obviously because you know he's a viking he was a viking yeah he was a viking um yeah i don't know what the fuck that show was but i watched it last night and absolutely despised it it was it was fucking done man you you you forced your way through to the end i didn't realize i won't do that if i start disliking the show at all i'll just move on i didn't realize how much i hated it until like the very last episode. And at this point, I've almost pushed it back out of my mind. But don't watch Vikings Valhalla. That was garbage. I also watched the final season of Kingdom of Heaven.
Starting point is 00:38:54 Or no, the last kingdom. The last kingdom. I always do that. Don't spoil that because I'm realizing now I started watching it again as like my late night or my workout show. And I'm like on episode six or seven of season one. And it's making me realize like i guarantee the first time i was watching this i was like playing video games or not paying attention at all like i wasn't giving it my undivided attention yeah i think i only got
Starting point is 00:39:15 to like season one and a half but so it's good i'm gonna keep forcing my way through not for the last good what the last kingdom was so good when it came out. I remember Game of Thrones was still coming out. I remember saying, if you guys like Game of Thrones, check out this show. It's like Game of Thrones Lite without the magic. It's like a more grounded version. There's a lot of political intrigue and fighting. It's quasi-historical. It's based on real people, but this is their fictionalized lives, obviously.
Starting point is 00:39:45 It's fun. Lots of sword fighting It's based on real people, but this is their fictionalized lives, obviously. And it's fun. Lots of sword fighting. Seems like the budget's okay. They can get more than 100 people together at a time. But there's a lot of those scenes, you know, where it's like, quick cut, quick cut, quick cut. You've never shown me more than 15 people at a time, bro. There's supposed to be 1,000.
Starting point is 00:39:59 You show me 15 here and then 15 over there and 15 over here. Like, I think it's the same 15 guys who just changing clothes. Uh, the last season was okay. Um, I will,
Starting point is 00:40:09 what I, what I will say is like finally a Netflix show made it to the fifth season and a finale. Um, at, at the end, there's kind of like this sort of flashback and you kind of get like this everything that's happened kind of moment,
Starting point is 00:40:25 you know, at the very end of the show. And it's like, yeah, okay. You took me on a journey. Cool. And you got to the end Netflix cause they cancel so many things.
Starting point is 00:40:33 Yeah. I can't, I can't remember all the projects, but there's been a couple of things that I really enjoyed and they, they just, Oh, the, um,
Starting point is 00:40:40 the mind hunters, the FBI thing. Like they cancel so much shit that they spend a lot of money on after one season it makes you wonder what research are they doing about their consumer base that would
Starting point is 00:40:56 make them drop tens of millions on a show that's going to get cancelled after a season. They do that all the time. We don't know their business model though. For all we know, it's incredibly cheap to make the first season a show of a show and way more expensive to continue on for a second season it could be or it could be maybe they they their market research shows well all we really need to do is have a constant stream of new and upcoming things it doesn't matter if it's consistent because by the time that's over there will be three new things to look forward
Starting point is 00:41:22 to and just constantly keep people on not calling for sunk cost fallacies. Could be. We tried a thing. We don't think it's worth doing twice. It'd be so interesting if they released their data of the actual viewership by category, by stuff. Obviously, they're not going to, but that'd be super
Starting point is 00:41:40 interesting. Did you guys watch the show our guest made from three weeks ago? Dude, I didn't want to throw him under the the bus but like that was so did you watch it i i quit when i got to the part where he is given himself like a starring role in the show and he's a terrible actor watch the whole thing what is the name of the show again i i totally forgot i i'm not good at that. I'm sorry. It captured my attention. I'll tell you. It was like rapid paced.
Starting point is 00:42:13 Like this topic. That topic. This topic. This is happening. That's how we're always moving from one thing to the next. It was like an ADHD fantasy show. The way that it rolled on. It was also a little hard to follow sometimes and the casting choices were interesting and like you have like I think if this guy diets and exercises
Starting point is 00:42:35 for a while he could get to dad bod why is he a superhero I don't know um but that's that's that was some of the casting choice uh Uh, the Batman guy I was thinking. Oh yeah. Yeah. That guy too. No, the casting was based on the extreme difficulty he had getting anybody to be a part of this project.
Starting point is 00:42:52 I'm sure. Guardians of justice is the name. I, and then in the end, like I tried to follow it. It was something about like, it turns out a dude was gay and he was trying to hide it all along or something.
Starting point is 00:43:05 Um, Superman's gay. that's for sure and and he partly why he killed himself so he wasn't found out i don't know but uh it it was dreadful uh like i said like i said i made i made it to the part where um you know there he is and is in all his autistic glory playing like the genius who invented kryptonite or whatever. And he's like being all weird. I think he's got a scar on his face, like a James Bond villain. He's like a James Bond villain type character. And he's just an awful actor, of course. And as soon as i saw that
Starting point is 00:43:45 i watched like 10 seconds of him act and i turned it off and i was like let's dot dodge the bullet dodge the bullet here wait he's the live action actor for the superman guy no for a different person like that maybe lex luther ish sure close yeah um it's it's all oh do you know who leah thomas is not i do not not right away now so leah thomas is a swimmer who has won i think an ncaa title now she's so in in in swimming if you're top 16 you're all american in your event and if you're number one you are a champion and this woman is a champion in her thing and she may you're number one, you are a champion. And this woman is a champion in her thing. And she may turn out to be a multi-time champion. This article, I said, she's a favorite to win two events and has a shot at three. She is a trans swimmer.
Starting point is 00:44:36 And everyone's very upset that this woman who was a man for most of her life is now a woman and she's just kicking ass in swimming i see this and think i missed an opportunity i could have done this i could have could be famous more famous than you are the best female swimmer of all time i would really look at like I could I would do this like in high school, high school level. Me would look at the women's Olympic champions and Olympic records and just pick off the ones that I could have set. I was an elite female athlete and I missed an opportunity. I will not rest until women's sports are destroyed. until women's sports are destroyed. Did you see what the governor of Florida did in response to that
Starting point is 00:45:28 big man winning the gold medal? This is the collegiate swimmer in the NCAA championship? No, what did he do? He already did something. Second place, well, because second place is from Florida.
Starting point is 00:45:44 Governor DeSantis said uh he had a true first place yeah great governor had a press conference second place don't devalue my potential account i'm not gonna tell the story you've interrupted me i'm sorry kyle y'all been interrupting me all day i don't want to talk y'all go ahead i'll sit here and be quiet y'all want to talk real bad i'll be quiet quiet. I feel bad. And I'm going to take all the heat for this. Taylor, we're getting off. Woody, do you know that Claude Giroux got traded? No, but
Starting point is 00:46:11 I really hear what the Florida governor did. What did the Florida governor do, Kyle? Clearly you want to tell us. He said silver place won. Go ahead. I'll be quiet. He said silver. He said bullshit second place won. He said she's the winner. I'll be quiet. He said silver. He said bullshit second place win. One.
Starting point is 00:46:27 He said she's the winner. I think Governor DeSantis lives in a world of participation trophies and not true champions like I do. I think this guy hands out gold medals to silver medalists. I, on the other hand, see her true accomplishment in that she is the best kind of female swimmer right now. She's a big one. That is that is so ridiculous that that she could just dominate the whole category.
Starting point is 00:47:00 Like, that's not fair like i saw the photo that the three ladies had like on the the podium where like the the first place trans person was there and then like the second third and fourth girls all did like their own little picture and i saw people getting so upset about that two three and four did like their own little group photo and there's a photo of like the three of them doing it and then just the trans swimmer standing there a head taller than everyone you know wide shoulders big hands for scooping the water like it's just not fair it's not fair scooping the water is that not what you say scooping swimming i'm looking at her picture right now can you share this picture please she's wearing a jacket over her shoulders when i saw her to like hide
Starting point is 00:47:51 how gigantic she is they boot her when they uh when they um like call her name i think she won by like it's it's not fair oh my god yeah you'd have stiff competition in your fantasy world, Woody. I don't know if I could beat her. That big bitch. She doesn't seem to have boobs. I don't see it. Why would she have boobs?
Starting point is 00:48:22 I don't know. I don't see him anyway. Why would she have boobs? I don't know. Are you saying a woman needs breasts to be a woman? Only big-breasted women are real women, according to Woody. Despicable. This man is gatekeeping womanhood over here with a bra-size inspection. Apparently, when she won,
Starting point is 00:48:46 she got subdued applause. Of course. Because it's not fair. I think she won by a tremendous margin. Maybe 18 seconds or something. I don't know. I don't know if that'd be a big margin. Anyone can look at that situation
Starting point is 00:49:01 and be like, oh, this is clearly incredibly unfair. 500 meters? 18 would be dumb she won by uh a second and a half oh she's not even that great i think that's a lot of time in swimming yeah but but you know and considering it seems like she's desantis was heartless about it he was like so they put a man up there and and he blows our girl out of the water considering it seems like she's DeSantis was heartless about it. He was like, so they put a man up there and he blows our girl out of the water. And it's like, let's be real. That's what it is.
Starting point is 00:49:31 People want to go hurt. Oh, like offended. They put a man up there and beat her girl. No, I don't think so. She's a Floridian. She's a champion. And we're making a proclamation. She won.
Starting point is 00:49:42 And it's like, like, I think they're making it official somehow. It's the key to the city. When he says we're making a proclamation, he doesn't just mean like, I'm saying it right now. I'm proclaiming it. He's like, write it fucking down. Ring the bell twice. Check the box. They're like, I am sending National Guard to the home of that
Starting point is 00:49:59 trans person to steal back. Oh, I'd love that. If somehow they went that route. That's not your trophy. We will send law enforcement. And we will be sending male police officers. And this transgender woman finds herself saran wrapped to a pole with a red ass.
Starting point is 00:50:21 That's what you get. Ukrainian justice. I don't think anybody likes that um like it's clear that that's that's absurd that's just there there are some people out there who act like it's totally fair above board like like i've unironically seen people be like well the they have limits on the testosterone that they can have and once the testosterone is equalized then there's no reason not to and it's like oh tell me you've never looked into this without telling me you've never looked into this yeah so you went through puberty as a man you got big hands you got big shoulders
Starting point is 00:50:51 you have no breasts you have less drag you're way stronger like it's bigger feet for kicking everything it's the angle of the it's the angle of the the legs coming out of the hips is a completely different thing the the amount of power they can create the the a a male figure skater can spend what four i watched i saw the diagram last night right read it read it educating me once again i think a male figure skater can uh do that jumping thing and then spend four times like a woman just cannot do that physically they're like yeah but a woman can do this and it's like a woman incredibly flexibly putting her leg up above her head because their hips are so flexible but like the the, the heart is completely different.
Starting point is 00:51:26 Like the muscle fibers are different and there's more of them. Obviously. I didn't expect that. Oh yeah. So I was watching this thing saying that in medicine right now, there's kind of a revolution about how they're treating women in medicine that historically they just considered them men with a hormone deficiency. Right.
Starting point is 00:51:44 And in my head, I'm like, well, I mean, aside from a few critical changes, aren't they, am I wrong on this? You know,
Starting point is 00:51:51 if a woman has a shoulder and injury, do we treat her differently than a, than a dude? Maybe I don't, but apparently there's some pretty core differences that I wasn't aware of. Oh yeah. Yeah. I think it's just the life.
Starting point is 00:52:04 It's the lifelong thing of testosterone. The denser bones and the bigger lungs and heart and the different shaped rib cage and pelvis. Even faster. Men have faster response time. Hmm. Well, I mean, it's going to vary, right? I wonder
Starting point is 00:52:20 what the best... It doesn't matter. In any case, it's a huge advantage to be a man. I have female hips so not any sport be in this race well not gymnastics not gymnastics and figure skating well actually it yeah in female gymnastics no male gymnastics obviously has to be men because there's not a woman on the planet strong enough to hold themselves up in that t-pose the way those jacked five foot two guys do i i bet you're right, because that's really hard, and a lot of men can't. Can a woman do the Iron Cross? What a cool name for
Starting point is 00:52:50 a workout. I think that's just one corner of gymnastics. In any case, it's nonsense to have a man go out there and compete with women in the end. I don't care. It kind of defeats a lot of the purpose of competition. Or fucking keep it up. Do this for another generation. Let's see how many It kind of defeats a lot of the purpose of competition. Or I'll say the entire purpose of the competition.
Starting point is 00:53:05 Or fucking keep it up. Do this for another generation. Let's see how many dudes are ballsy enough to be like, dude, I get a scholarship. Yeah, but you got to wear a dress. No, you don't. No, you don't. Look at me.
Starting point is 00:53:22 I'm a woman. I just did it. I just became the third best female athlete at Georgetown. Like that. On a rocket from 500th overall man to first overall woman. If you're a good high school athlete, chances are you're a very, very good collegiate lady athlete, right? Am I crazy about this? I remember...
Starting point is 00:53:48 A lot of sports? Oh, you're right. When I was 14... Actually, I think I was 13. They had us do an exhibition game. Nobody was watching. It was just like a practice game. They were like, all right, you guys...
Starting point is 00:54:04 We're all 13- old boys they're like you're gonna play the uh 18 year old women's team like girls team and it was the highest level like they they can play at and we were all like like the highest level because like oh i know my friend steve he plays for the AAA Junior Blues. I'm imagining that level of skill. And they're 18, five more years. It was unreal how much better our team was than theirs. It wasn't close. And that adds into the fact that every single time I would see one of our forwards skate up, they would have to pull back and be like,
Starting point is 00:54:40 oh, wait, there's no hitting. There's no hitting allowed. And then they would just gently steal the puck and go score. And that's the way the whole game went like their shots i was saving was like that's just that's way slower than a 13 year old boy's shot like they're muffins floating in at you and it just wasn't fair and that was a five-year gap and like very key years so it's just beyond unfair i googled the iron cross thing i was curious like has any girl ever done it um apparently not no woman has ever done the iron cross but some badass gymnasts and you know
Starting point is 00:55:11 they're out there have done it with like mildly bent arms like they're close yeah that's such an impressive pose to hold i couldn't do it i feel like what percentage of people can do that of course we can't do it we don't do but if we set out to do it, we could do it. That's what matters. I guarantee that if any of the three of us goal was to do a fucking T-pose or whatever it's called by this time next year, we'd be knocking it the fuck out. Meanwhile, you could go find a little girl who's seven and be like, you're to save the planet. Your entire life's mission will be to do a T-pose for five fucking seconds.
Starting point is 00:55:49 Did Kyle did? Yeah, Kyle did on a whim one year. That's when he was bored and so he decided to work towards it. Yeah, there aren't many women who can do muscle-ups either. My ceiling's too low to really work on muscle-ups.
Starting point is 00:56:08 My squat rack is near the ceiling fan. The world record for muscle-ups? It was so low that I was intrigued. Wait, what? What is it? It was like 50 or something. That's a shit ton. I want to see the form.
Starting point is 00:56:23 You can go to some crossfit guy who does like 200 pull-ups in a minute i watched him do them okay he did okay okay i'll cross that and yeah all right he looks like he's so lean it's so he looks like athlean x but like more yoked like he's that level of cut but like he looks silly but he was just cranking him out and i think the record was like 48 or something like something like that in your head it's like shit doesn't take long to get there like it's just extreme hard thing for like a couple minutes and you've got the world record every so often i'll see like a completely jacked fitness model looking dude who apparently just goes to like kids pull-up bars and makes up workouts yeah and you see him on youtube and they're always cheered on with
Starting point is 00:57:12 cheers i don't understand like go kyle kyle's paying taxes over here i'm like he's reaming it out he's reaming it out play-doh style oh that's a big dipper i don't understand you cheering but okay speaking of cheering but all right so is it taylor there's a ufc fighter if you want like to get a little bit into ufc there's this new guy who's like really unproven he's from a different organization called patty the baddie he's this british kid and he's like 18 years old or something he's very young probably probably probably much older but but to me he looks like a kid and uh 27 and he's fucking hilarious like like the crowd loves him so much like like i didn't know anything about him i i had heard his name before like oh yeah
Starting point is 00:57:59 patty the baddie it's a cool name right and uh but but he goes to it's the fight before his and it's this girl named uh meatball mcmahon or something like that who i also didn't know i like it she's the one who did that spinning back elbow and sent that black girl to the fucking shadow realm so kyle sent the um like a highlight of it and it was pretty longish. I don't know how long. I'm going to call it two minutes. Usually when you see a fight highlight, you're like, ooh, fighter A is whooping on fighter B. I'm about to see a knockout.
Starting point is 00:58:34 These girls were whipping on each other. I didn't know which one was going to be the highlight. Because that one, nice hit. Back nice hit. Nice counter. Nice hit. It was a very good fight until the end. So she goes to do her post-fight interview, right?
Starting point is 00:58:51 She just killed this bitch. It was one of those knockouts where it's like the camera doesn't go to the opponent ever again. You see her drop the girl, and then it's like, all right, maybe she shit herself. We'll never know. They just didn't put the camera back on her. It was bad. And she gets up there, and she says some stuff with her awful British accent about how she killed this bitch. And then she goes like, who's ready for Patty the Batty?
Starting point is 00:59:19 That's all I care about. And the crowd's like, yeah, we all want Patty the Batty. And I can remember the cheer she did. It was like, she just went, she went, oh, Patty the Batty. And the whole crowd of like 30,000 people goes, like, they know that cheer. They all go, oh, Patty the Batty. And so like, then Patty comes out like 10 minutes later and his intro music is it's a little it's close to the moral combat music but it's a little off and he's coming out
Starting point is 00:59:55 like playing the imaginary bongos the whole way to the music and the crowd's losing their shit he's got that ridiculous blonde mop on and the the crowd's wearing him too. Bear in mind, this is a guy who makes $12,000 a fight. He gets $12,000 to show up, and $12,000 more if he wins. This is his second UFC fight ever, and they're there for him. He's the people's main event. I stopped watching. I didn't watch the main event. It was awful.
Starting point is 01:00:20 I watched a couple minutes. You watched Patty the Batty. This is terrible. I watched Patty the Batty. He comes out, uh he's in a little trouble at first and then he like judo throws this guy like something out of a james bond movie and chokes him the fuck out it was beautiful and the crowd again loses their shit he runs and like jumps out of the cage and then the the megan meatball mcmahon girl who was like
Starting point is 01:00:42 freaking out for him earlier when he was doing his intro, she's sitting next to Dana white. He's allowed her to come out and he's like, she's chugging a beer over there next to me, losing her mind. When Patty comes out, you go back and watch the, uh,
Starting point is 01:00:57 the, the intro, you can watch it on YouTube and you know, he's coming out and, and Megan's like over there. She's going crazy she should always fight before him she when he not when he like gets the win and he's like first of all he does some crazy silly little dance but then she runs and jumps into the cage with him and celebrates with him in the cage it was great they're clearly like it looks like he he has a quote after a fight where he said i want to fight mark zuckerberg yeah his instagram got uh the uh banned and zuckerberg
Starting point is 01:01:32 owns instagram so he challenged zuckerberg to a fight oh is that the background oh i see yep uh apparently this guy so i'm not that good at evaluating fighters. I can evaluate two guys against each other, but his level of competition is apparently very low. He fought tougher guys before he was in the UFC. They're just feeding him chumps. We'll see where this goes. Because he's winning, he's
Starting point is 01:01:58 getting attention. You can't feed him chumps forever. Who was the really handsome guy who did flips and he never cursed you're gonna know almost when i say his name he was young he looked like a karate sage cliff or something like that sage north cut something like sage north cut or north cliff or something like that the beautiful man who's like a christ fella. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it is Sage Northcutt.
Starting point is 01:02:29 This guy, can you pull up a picture of Sage Northcutt, Zach? This guy looked amazing, but he wasn't that good a fighter. He looks like he's made in a lab. Yeah, he went to another organization, and after they were done with him, they needed to rebuild that guy in a lab. He got hit in the jaw. It looked like something from a sci-fi movie when he got hit. He got ruined by that by
Starting point is 01:02:46 that punch to the face um i i i i see where you draw the comparison there um he just people keep saying like oh fight somebody in the top 10 he's like that's not even a good picture oh that's a terrible that's his worst day yeah this is him like with a year off thanksgiving yeah yeah he's so big um no i uh i think his his somebody was like why don't you fight this guy he's in the tcs he's ranked 12th and he's like for twelve thousand dollars you want me to fight that guy absolutely not you have to come back in there with a better contract hey Hey, I'll fight whoever you want. You're going to have to pay me to fight them, though. Yeah, there you go. His father was a professional bodybuilder and steroid
Starting point is 01:03:30 user. I have my suspicions. Get that bullshit off the screen of Total War nonsense that he's hawking. I was just about to say, do you think he takes glycerol, Taylor? I think he's taken more than that.
Starting point is 01:03:48 I think so, too. He looks terrific. He looks terrific. I have been paying attention to the fitness influencers who've been dying lately. I guess it's because I watch More Plates, More Dates and Greg Doucette. Yeah. I never even hear of these people. Typically, I don't hear of them.
Starting point is 01:04:04 I do know. Who's the guy with the rigorous upload schedule who's been dead for a year you know the truth about that and why we probably should it's got to be that his fan i think that his family needs the income and they are re-uploading older videos to kind of keep consider that i think that that's what's actually happening all jokes aside for some reason I was just sure that he had this much in the can we're gonna stick with that joke because it's funny and no one's checking up on us
Starting point is 01:04:36 the only youtuber that does years in advance and he doesn't upload a little he uploads like three times a week but it's a lot. But yeah, so him I had heard of before his death. I'd watched a lot of his videos actually. But most of these guys I haven't heard of.
Starting point is 01:04:52 But it's just weird to see people drop who are perfect specimens. Well, anyway. You look at it on the outside. It depends what they've done to themselves on the inside. When I saw Sage Northcutt, I was like, I wonder how healthy he really is. Obviously, he looks terrific. I would trade his look.
Starting point is 01:05:11 But my old heart might be better than his. I don't know. Yeah, I think with a lot of that stuff, you're kind of burning the candle at both ends, physiologically speaking. And I think it's better now. speaking uh and uh i think i think it's better now um i i think that a lot of the like bodybuilders who were taking like back in the back in the old days i think i think a lot of those guys killed themselves essentially i don't mean like they got suicidal kill themselves i mean whatever the shit they were taking like so much of and everything it seems like people are more health conscious about that stuff now some are some are there's still oh yeah those people who are just like
Starting point is 01:05:42 jacket to the max there's always going to to be those people. There's those people who shoot oil into their muscles. There's crazy people everywhere. Synthol. Yeah. I feel like mostly Derek and some of the other guys in his universe are doing good things to like, hey, you can take lower doses of this stuff. You can take safer doses. You can do this without going crazy. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:02 Arnold's the guy who seems to have been just impervious to the shit. Cause he just used so much for so many years and he has his hair. I mean, he's like, he's very old and he's got a, quite a good head of hair for his age. True.
Starting point is 01:06:16 I wonder how that happened. Yeah. That could be unnatural too. It's gotta be a genetic outlier thing. It's just something about how he processes. All kinds of ways. I need to get his ejaculate oh god that's work for it he's got a lot of head he's got good genetics too you know
Starting point is 01:06:37 he was a tank commander or some shit not a tank commander like a tank driver or something they put that big motherfucker in a tank in austria and had him driving the he was just bear crawling around the fucking eastern european countryside terrorizing villages he had to go awol he had to go awol to compete in some uh bodybuilding competition i think he went and won and then he had to go and like be in like the brig for like weeks or something like that because he had a very interesting life tale. Yeah. I read somewhere, because I always think
Starting point is 01:07:10 of him as becoming a millionaire from Hollywood, right? I read that he made his first million selling gym equipment. Like, you know, in the back of magazines used to be the place where you go to get all sorts of... You think he'd be sponsored by people that sell jimmy quinn right he wasn't a salesman
Starting point is 01:07:27 yeah not not directly he was like sponsored by them or you know maybe his picture was in there and he maybe he owned the company i didn't get the nitty-gritty of it but but i read once that like he had become a millionaire like from like workout equipment long before he like mastered the english language and did all that like stuff that he did. He took all those tons and tons of different classes, from acting to English to the posing stuff and all the ballet nonsense.
Starting point is 01:07:57 I like that guy. What's the guy's name who just went crazy? I have Mike Calhoun in my head, but he's not coming up. He's a bodybuilder. Greg Doucette made a video on him. Oh, I don't know. I don't watch Greg much.
Starting point is 01:08:11 Shucks. Anyway, bodybuilder. Looks amazing. He's not too big. Probably any of us would want to look like this guy. Where some bodybuilders I wouldn't even trade. And he's gone crazy he road raged rammed a guy with his car got out of his car the other guy gets out of his car and starts running
Starting point is 01:08:34 rammed into our man takes a machete and chases the guy The guy runs and runs and runs, gets to create a little gap. Bodybuilders not known for their speed. Gets in his car and races off. Now he has a legal problem on his hands. I would imagine so. You can't brandish machetes and chase people in public.
Starting point is 01:08:59 Use your rules. Uncouth. Untoward. I'd call it rude. Callum Van Monger. Here, Zach, can you pull up a picture of this dude? I don't know anything about anything. It's my suspicion. I always point to Tren. Isn't that the one that makes
Starting point is 01:09:20 you crazy? It seems to be the joke in the circles of steroid people. Is it Trenbalone? Is that the full name? Trenbalone, I think. I believe so, yeah. Zach, I'll have a picture of this guy. I know we're a little over time, but this guy looks...
Starting point is 01:09:34 He might be a little too big, but he looks fantastic. Okay, yeah. I mean, that's like the maximum of big. We gotta stop here. We can't go anymore. Honestly, that's like the maximum of big. We've got to stop here. We can't go anymore. Honestly, that's too big. He's so thick everywhere. There's so much mass.
Starting point is 01:09:54 He's not even all that. I don't want you to look. He's cut, but he has so much mass that you can't get as cut as I would like to be with that much mass. It's too much. And his veins are at the beginning stages of doing that thing. Like right before people die. My Adonis lines are pretty nice, but
Starting point is 01:10:13 his has some kind of thing on it. The bridge's too far, dude. Good looking fella, though. A little too much. Yeah, he's fortunate. Everybody's good looking if your teeth are straight and your body fat's low, too much. Yeah. Everybody's good looking if your teeth are straight and your body fat's low, pretty much. But this next picture,
Starting point is 01:10:31 he's a handsome... He's more handsome than other people who are in really good shape. Dude, I would trade in half a second. He looks short. Is he? No. 6'2 is tall for someone with his mass. His lower body is so short. Is he? No. 6'2 is tall for someone with his mass. His lower body is so short.
Starting point is 01:10:49 Really? I think that's because of how huge his legs are. It could just be that. Oh. I think his legs are very short. I think he's like all over the body. Scroll down, you can see his legs. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:11:02 Zach. Yeah, he's got short legs. Look, I'm sure he's fine with it. See, there's a picture of him lower just mogging the statue of David. What does mogging mean? He's just looking incredible. He's dominating. Look how much better he looks than
Starting point is 01:11:22 that little shit Michael Anselman. David has bigger testicles than this guy. I think I take take it back i don't think i think his legs are too big though his like his upper body is like the upper limit of as big as i would want to be his legs are way too far he's doing too much quad work i wonder what he looks like just chill though right like like these are him with a pump on probably a kind of a cut his body fat's so low like he looks i bet this guy is never chill he's near peak like like this guy can't buy jeans like like they're too fucking big bro they're too big they're they're they're too they're gross they're too big interesting so i'm usually the the first one to say a person's too big
Starting point is 01:12:01 uh i guess he's proportional and it's look i think he's out big. I guess he's proportional. To me, he's out of proportion. To me, his legs are so far. It looks like maybe it's just this image we're looking at, but his left leg looks as wide as his torso almost. He could stand to miss some
Starting point is 01:12:22 quads. His dick needs to be a fire hydrant to look normal. Well, let me tell you. If he pulls out six inches, it's going to be laughable on his frame. Arnold Schwarzenegger in some sort of movie. I dare you to laugh at it.
Starting point is 01:12:40 Oh, yeah. I know the movie you're talking about. This is that guy okay oh you seem to know him outside the imagine a confidence boost like that we need you to play arnold in his prime he kind of he like there's a lot of pictures if you just google his name of him and arnold like next to each other he stacks up pretty well yeah i picture it like every other sport where people from nowadays just eclipse people from for sure you take this guy and put him 70 or not 70 what was it 50 years ago when
Starting point is 01:13:12 arnold was competing heavy we'd be remembering this guy's name too i i don't know enough about it to know anything about that um i know that a lot of them seem don't seem to be able to match his like um proportions i guess i i think i think because of some of the drugs that get them as big I know that a lot of them don't seem to be able to match his proportions, I guess. I think because of some of the drugs that get them as big as they are now, it holds them back in some areas. I know at the Arnold Classic, that one guy who won, Arnold comes out and he's like, show him a nice vacuum. And he's making fun of the guy in front of everybody, the guy who just won because he can't do a vacuum because he's got hgh gut and arnold would do that like vacuum where like you can almost see a spine behind his belly button he sucked everything in so much and his
Starting point is 01:13:53 rib cage is like butterfly wings yeah i i do i know exactly what you're talking about i've seen that clip um yeah his proportions were crazy i think that it's just what the judges reward they seem to prefer an out-of-proportion mass monster over a well-proportioned guy like schwarzenegger yeah and i mean there's different kind of competitions as well i guess i don't like any of that shit i'm being honest like i know that's like derrick's thing but i don't fucking get it it's i won't use any names but i i remember i I ran into somebody and a famous person. And I guess they were like part time. They did bodybuilding.
Starting point is 01:14:29 And he's like, he's trying to impress me. And he's trying to get me to do social media stuff with him. And I'm just trying to get away from him. And he's like, check this out. It's like him and his friend. His friend's like, check it out, bro. He's like, it's hype, man. He's like, you're not going to believe it.
Starting point is 01:14:42 And he pulls out his phone. And it's like him at a bodybuilding competition with a speedo on all greased up and i'm just like neat men's physique man is typically what i wish i could look like i never will right and i'm pretty happy with just the best version of me like you know i'm fine but i gave a search for zach hopefully to pull up and i just Googled men's physique. These guys all look great. We'll see them in a minute. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:15:13 No, no. That's a whole different thing. Yeah. This is more like what men want to actually look like kind of thing. And what women want their men to look like, maybe. Actually, women runs the gamut. There's plenty of women that want chubby dudes. Yes, there literally are. I
Starting point is 01:15:32 yeah, that's just what's up. There are women who want chubby dudes. I was talking to a girl not that long ago. She's like, I think I like hairy bear type guys. I'm like, I don't even call them bears if they're straight. I keep going after bears and I keep getting shot down i don't know the problem is um so so yeah i think different chicks are into all sorts of different shit so uh it doesn't really matter oh i mean just play it there's some like freaks out there that's ears perked up. Really? No.
Starting point is 01:16:06 It's rare that they're into the super muscular dudes though, like the bodybuilder, mass monsters, whatever. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, somebody's got to be. Somebody's into just about everything. Yep. You guys want to call it a show? I can smell
Starting point is 01:16:21 my drink already out there. I can smell my coffee. Nice. All right. PKN 396.

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