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pkn449 what's up boys hello there not too much i've just been thinking a lot about warhammer
yeah unit compositions and armies kyle and i've been playing a good bit down and out i was like
did that school shooting get to him is taylor bugged no because i saw the resolution it was
great he's the resolution on total war warhammers we're talking about no i'm talking about when the
cop shot that kid i'm talking about the 144 hertz total war warhammer is what we're talking about. No, I'm talking about when the cop shot that kid. I'm talking about the 144
hertz Total War Warhammer 3.
Now, I'm loving that too.
Now, I want to say this.
I figured out why I've been struggling so much,
I think. You guys have both been playing
the new race,
and I haven't really been paying attention to the name of your
units, but then I noticed you're using
the same unit.
And I looked at their stats, and they're just
so full of armor and
shields, and I've been shooting them and hitting
them. I gotta stop all that.
I brought them because you kept bringing shooty guys
and so I'm shielding up.
I saw that solution
today. I'm so stoned when I play
that I guess I wasn't thinking out
even inside the box.
I don't know where I am.
I'm not thinking at all, really.
Yeah, I'm having a blast.
But frankly, we need some more people who are on our level.
Yeah, Unicorn's getting much better quickly.
Yeah, we played two or three times,
and I definitely beat him once,
and he definitely beat me at least once earlier playing SlaNash,
so he's pretty good.
Yeah, it's really fun. love i love a good rts and uh this one is just it's hard to get bored of it
because there's so many different races to play um someone pointed out the starcraft i think has
what like four races or something like that and they struggle keeping that balance meanwhile this
game has at least 15 or 20 and it's very well balanced i mean there's maybe three dog
shit ones and three very good ones but the middle is a nice warm area where every any anything can
do anything it's more balanced i thought it was when i started a month or so ago taylor did you
woody mentioned mentioned it when we kicked off did you see the video of the cops storming into
the school i saw one of them but I think there might be multiple, right?
So the video I saw is, I don't know.
Someone showed me a picture of the cop.
It was a body cam with a guy with a pistol.
I saw the guy with the rifle.
So he's the one who shows up there first,
and the teacher tells him,
gives him some directions,
and then he's like,
come on, I need two!
Come on, I need two! And he needs two men with him and then he's like come on i need two come on i need two and he needs two men with him and he's like now and he's turning the key he's no fucking uvalde
cop i'm inspired already yeah and and they're like immediately stack up with me he's like that door
you cover left and he's fucking sweeping every door as they go through and they hear boom boom
he's like that's upstairs fuck all this we're going up the stairs down the hallway dead child on the floor they go they step right over that go into an atrium where it opens
up and the shooter has knocked out some windows and sort of this open area so they can shoot down
um out at maybe people outside and dude just goes bop bop bop bop bop like shoots the person the
person falls as awkwardly as you can fall.
I couldn't tell because they blur out as soon as people die.
Imagine if you fall down on your knees
and then let your feet
flay out and then
fall backwards.
That's how the shooter falls.
Like a dead person.
And then Jimmy handgun comes along
and goes, stop reaching for your gun!
Bang, bang, bang!
Good job, Jimmy. Sometimes jimmy be safe yeah the chubby cop with the 12 gauge at least he had enough like
well let's not make a mess to to not like fire another uh blast in there but yeah pretty pretty
awful i think maybe three kids uh or something like, some administrator or something. It's terrible.
I couldn't tell what kind of weapon the shooter had.
But, yeah, it was nice to see the cops got in there super fast, super motivated,
clearing rooms, bathrooms, closets, whatever.
And as soon as they heard shots and got better directions,
they sprinted to it and killed the guy real fast.
Good.
They handled it way better than the other cops we've seen try and handle shit. I like that they didn't say anything when they killed the guy. Like, real fast. Good. They handled it way better
than the other cops we've seen try and handle shit.
I like that they didn't say anything when they killed him either.
They didn't say, hey, put that down.
They just killed the person.
Yeah. Or, you know,
maybe a catchphrase would have been good there.
A catchphrase?
A catchphrase, yeah.
Like one that doesn't make sense.
Where it's like, it's time to put you on ice.
It's like, what?
What are you talking about?
This guy had no class.
Huh?
For a school shooting?
Maybe?
I think you're going to be fired from the police department.
For your callous remarks.
The police chief is dropping
puns.
God damn it, I don't like it any better than you do,
Mayor Smith, but he's the best goddamn police
chief we have.
He's just
obnoxious,
but he's so good.
I can't fire him.
This town ain't big enough for the two of us. Stop saying
that!
Yeah, that tragic story really fucked up, but good.
It was a hero cop, though.
Doesn't seem like they just let the person run rampant for what was Uvalde, like 40 minutes of just doing whatever they wanted. Yeah, while the cops were pussies. Absolute fucking
pussies. Like, on camera.
Twelve of them. All
like, I don't know, I think the bad guy's down the
hallway there. We should probably just not go there.
Yeah, whatever came
of it. Did they say, like,
did the cops themselves claim, like, the chief
said, don't do anything?
Or did... I don't know. I think a lot of people
lost their jobs. I think
police chiefs and
lots of administration all lost their jobs.
That's going to be the end of it.
They need to. There's a cultural, systemic
issue in that.
If one cop's a coward, then
you know what should happen. If
14 cops cower
together while children are getting
shot,
good gosh.
Yeah, I love that.
There was like a meme.
It's like cops when you've got an ounce of weed versus cops when children are dying.
Oh, that reminds me.
Afro man.
So you might know rapper Afro man.
I know Afro man.
You do.
If I sing a song, though, Woody, I was going to go to school, but then I got high.
Okay, you were right that song
yeah everybody knows he's the only song redemption of rap yeah so he um they raided his house
his uh um like local local law enforcement they raided his house uh the warrant said narcotics
and kidnapping he's got them all on camera he's got nothing wrong in his house, by the way. Not even narcotics?
No, not even any fucking...
Not even any kidnapping. He's like, why the fuck
does it... I mean, I understand why
it says narcotics, but why the fuck does it say kidnapping?
Like, none of it's
the case, but he's got them all on
camera, and he made a music video.
Yeah, there he is.
There he is getting his money back.
Damn, He looks old
I have not seen him in a long time
Dude
Leave Afro Man alone
Look that's what Afro Man looks like
When he's not in an interrogation cell Taylor
How dare you callous
You're right he hasn't aged a day
How old is Afro Man
He's 37
He takes really bad care of himself
yeah Black does crack sometimes
alright he's alright for 48
anyway anywho
he made a whole rap song
using the footage
from his security cameras
he's like why are you going through my
suit pockets why are you
stealing my money?
As they go through his shit.
And what else?
That's hilarious.
I got to listen to that.
He's rapping like, do you think there's a thousand pounds of narcotics?
And did you want my lemon pound cake?
And the fat cop is like looking at his lemon pound cake.
You can have my lemon pound cake.
Bring up that picture of Afverman you just had there.
That one where he's talking to the reporter.
In this photo, he looks like
you know in Skyrim when
a cutscene happens and your insane
character is there next to a normal guard.
That's exactly what this is.
You've got all your fucking custom
outfits and you're talking to
the blacksmith.
He looks so fabulous.
Like, wearing what's clearly a word.
You know what he looks?
He looks so comfortable.
Oh, that's clearly a wig.
It looks like a football helmet.
Yeah, that has to be a wig.
I see it now.
Why is it down below his ears and shit?
Yeah.
Okay.
He does look like a football helmet.
Every time you say it, it just gets more right.
How big is his head?
He's not afraid of police, but he's horrified of CTE.
It's this close to being a Russian hat.
Man, I want to start dressing just in furs.
Yeah, they unplugged his cameras.
They unplugged my cameras during the raid, too.
They do that
they don't like being recorded I guess
nice photoshop
in the CNN store
at the airport
well I think that's probably a fan
saw him there right and he was just dressed like that
nope doesn't add up what the fuck is that photo
it was him clearly
at like the CNN or whatever
the news desk store you know exactly
it looked like the airport, like when you're
getting a magazine or something.
You could tell because the Excedrin was like $12.
Before
the on-flight
internet and better electronic
devices, it's like, alright, what is it? Six-hour
flight? Eight magazines?
Immense health? No, I don't want
to feel bad on the way. I'm going to have a few drinks
myself.
Just have a few drinks because you're so there's a playboy here do i have the balls to read a playboy on the plane no better electronics i would always get outdoorsman magazines because
they would have short stories of like survival stuff like bear attack thing it'd be like three
pages of a bear attack reading for the articles right i mean it's fucking survival magazine jacking off the bears
fucking ads for bug repellent and shit like what are you gonna do that's the that's the worst if
you if you jerk off materials are limited and you really gotta fell in the head i think i could still do
it to like a sky mall uh yeah oh that's way too much deep isn't it yeah yeah look at her and her
exposed shoulders she's in for a bad time look at that naughty bitch in her contour pillow
put her hands in under her head that she lays on like that
like that's what i used to do before anything was on planes is just read sky mall
and everybody the amount of time it takes to go from sky mall being like oh that's kind of neat
to like oh it's like four seconds i'm a little too suspicious right like there are things if
you tell me pour this in my gas you'll do this for my engine i assume all of it is bullshit
all of it not a goddamn thing at auto zone does anything for your car with the exception of
possibly the motor oil right like that's my take on it i'm doing this
fish stuff right now there's a million fucking snake oils they want to sell you to dump into
your tank um it's my nature to be against this stuff and you mentioned sky mall i'm like oh
twelve hundred dollars is that a plastic piece of shit they're selling for an outrageous coin
i i don't believe anything from sky mall no no you don't
believe it but i think it was real products just silly ones i don't think they're like in any way
quality price relative like oh a fencing sword for 132 dollars oh i am low on fence
you need to know the same thing with metal detectors
I remember a metal detector being in a
SkyMall for like $600
and thinking like
now I have like a job to recoup
like with metal this expense
I always wanted one of those as a kid
you just reminded me that's one of those
things as a kid I would often request
because I just thought it would be really fun to walk around out in the farm or the woods and be digging shit
up um that would have been neat dude what's neat is the beach so i don't want to i like it at the
beach people are losing shit all the time and the theory is that it's like rings slipping off their
fingers or maybe they take something off put it on the blanket
and you know shit happens it falls off the blanket it goes one inch deep in the sand and
now it's just gone forever and till fucking grandpa comes by with his metal detector and
every night you see like 16 grandpas just scanning the beach with their metal detectors looking for
stuff and as a child you think it's like the key to fame and fortune oh my god there's treasures out there every day people are leaving
treasures but just follow gramps just follow him for 10 minutes he's picking up pennies yeah that
guy's retired he's just killing time like he's just he's not looking i bet those guys it's not copper yeah those guys
guys would be interesting to talk to though because okay they're not making money i don't
think that's their goal or they go panhandle i'm always shocked if when they add up what a
panhandler makes i remember uh my local radio show uh like did a thing where it's like yeah
for torture tuesday you've got to go panhandle until you make a
hundred dollars it's like 45 minutes later he's eating breakfast at starbucks with the money he
begged like it didn't take any time it's like dude wait you make he's like i made more money
today begging then i then i do like we're paid to beg that's hilarious you know yeah yeah we should do this every day i'm gonna i'm gonna get a
sandwich board go out there no and i'm gonna wear a barrel with suspenders on it dude that's good
and make it look like you're naked underneath like you've got that's all you have you know
no i will be that's the commitment to the bit you throw some shorts on i don't have money for shorts i'm a
barrel man damn if you don't want to see my dick pony i think i think you could mix in like
performance art with your panhandling though like because you bring a lid for the barrel and you if
you squat you could be like hiding and just on the sidewalk and then pop out do a little sachet
and a bow and be like
you know oh i'm in a barrel with my wife could you lend me a few bucks how about i do stuff like
stomp like you know that show stomp where they hit garbage cans but i don't do it with my own
equipment i do it in front of people's homes until they pay me to leave oh that's an idea
stop banging on my mailbox. You know in the movies? No, this is hard.
It's like
my face is painted blue.
Is that blue?
Give me $18. I'll do some
art on the hood of your car next.
The Pooh Man group. The homeless
performers.
They throw feces at you if you refuse to give them money.
Yeah, I don't care for that kind of homeless.
The kind who basically tacitly threaten you with performances not i hate the homeless
or what are they called they're called like the the fucking vague unhoused or something now like
like some some fucking nonsense no you're lucky we stopped calling you hobos dude that's so funny
to me that like someone thinks that someone who's like chasing and talking to rats on the street like that if you like put them in the house they work at the bank now are you retarded
are you fucking retarded all right well not those but i'm sure there's some that that that are like
oh you know like living in their car and working a job and showering at fucking the gym right like
like the there's a minority like most of them are mentally ill. I think the jabbering ones
are the minority, too. Like in the middle,
they're...
I still think
most of them are mentally ill.
I think most of them are drug addicts.
You're doing the crazy guy from Rick
and Morty that was attacking Beth, and
then the husband just locked himself in the car.
She's like, help me! No, you're not supposed
to confront them! Just get in the car! I, you're not supposed to confront them. Just get in the car.
I read you're not supposed to do that.
Just run.
But he's just jabbering.
It's Rick and Morty.
But the crazy man's jabbering.
And I think he's got a blade or something.
Jabbering is such a funny word.
Yeah.
Most of them have mental issues.
You're right.
Addiction is fucking huge. you know just heroin generally very difficult yeah i don't know i bet it's a fun
life though like like there's no way like if you're in like one of san francisco or uh san
francisco would be a good one like like if you're just like a guy who wants to do drugs and chill
out all the time like you could live a real happy life in San Francisco just being stoned
and homeless all the time, everything paid for.
Listen to an hour-long podcast on this. It was a homeless
encampment, but it was all military veterans.
In some ways, it was like any other homeless camp. There were tents.
They were not welcome tents they were on like not welcome
where they were they uh there were lots of drug use there were a couple murders like it was a
problem on the other hand like they woke up on time there was a certain military culture there
they're all veterans they like have a purpose and the guy's getting interviewed because it was like a tv
show they did on it i didn't see the show i watched a podcast and uh uh he's like yeah man
i could never live in an apartment this is where i want to be if i was alone in an apartment i'd
be on a suicide watch that sounds terrible i need this community for me right now it sounded like
he was dealing with some sort of ptsd yeah but the thrust
of the podcast was no veteran should ever be homeless and i was just like so homeless veterans
i guess are better than other homeless people i think so i here's here's why i think um veterans
have an excuse like like they went to do their job and their job is a
hazardous one. It would be like
if we sent some people in for nuclear
cleanup and they were now
unhousable because of
the radiation or something.
It's not even a hazardous job.
It's not in the top ten. In the military?
Yeah. Lumberjacks?
Fishermen?
I think the ones with PTSD are the ones with the dangerous
jobs so it depends if you go yeah the military is not dangerous x percentage die like however it
works we're talking about the combat guys though right like if you've got ptsd from being in the
mail room as a clerk or if you're like frank costanza you got ptsd because you serve some
raw some raw beef one time, some off beef.
That's not going to cut it. But I bet if combat troop was where we got our statistics, like guys who are actually fighting, I think a lot of them have a rough time.
And I think it's real dangerous.
I'll say this.
If you're a combat troop in Russia right now, that's got to be the most dangerous job in the
fucking world because there's a war.
A real war. Dude, the thing with
you were saying, oh, they should never be homeless.
If you're a PTSD
combat veteran, yeah, there
is zero fucking excuse to be
homeless. The government, you did your fucking job.
You did what you were sent there to do.
The government needs to have
their ass when they're so damaged from doing that shit
that they can't do other stuff normally
does that include other jobs that are traumatic?
like tow truck drivers are at least as traumatic
as a soldier
well I mean that's more of like a private job
like tow truck driver
so if you get your trauma in a combat
then you're set for life
you can never be homeless, you can never be without healthcare
you can never be without. You can never be without healthcare. You can never be without income.
Traumatize me, daddy.
I would say it would be trauma like in the military.
Like, I think that's a pretty fair line.
What if I make up some trauma?
Cause I'll, I'll join now.
Okay, fine.
Combat, combat veterans.
I'll fight if I get, look, if I get to fight a little,
then I can come right back and be like,
oh, I'm so PTSD out.
I'm going to need you to like support me forever. Okay, say this i'll say this and maybe this is like a bad like
example but i i did that charity thing for i don't know crippled warriors or some shit okay and uh
anyway this kid was um he'd been shot in the neck i think they had like his thyroid or something so
that it like over really complicated his condition now anyway he had like three quarters use of one arm and that was about it like everything else moved a little but like you
couldn't do anything with the rest of it he was all like yeah my life is awful like like all like
like fucked up but he could drive and uh like because he had the one arm he had the one good
arm and he was getting so much assistance and so much money. He had two vehicles.
One was the supercharged brand new Camaro, like the ZL1 Camaro.
And the other was, I can't remember which.
Oh, it was the Raptor.
He had a Ford Raptor.
And his Ford Raptor, like both doors open up suicide style.
And then an elevator picks him up and twists him in there like he's a goddamn decepticon that
rocks that's so cool and and he's like he got pulled over with with kitty going like really
fucking fast in his car well i'm like you let that cripple drive fast there's no way he's a
good driver anyway he and and like the cop is so like the cop gets there, and he's like, Hello, sir. Yes, I'm a Marine veteran.
Please don't.
And the cop's like, Oh, my God.
Super fire.
Carry on, soldier.
The cop gives him half a handy or whatever.
Half a handy.
That's just cruelty.
That's worse than no handy.
Yeah.
I'm not on board with this.
Our veterans need better treatment. But he was getting taken care of pretty well and plus
you know he got to hang out with me which is the greatest prize of all so um i mean you know we
lowered we lowered him into that tank like a fucking we lowered him into that tank like a
marionette i really struggle with this veteran benefits type thing.
Is it really a lifetime income, lifetime housing, lifetime safety net forever for four jobs?
I'm not saying the job's not traumatic or dangerous.
I know I said it wasn't the most dangerous.
But my friend was a tow truck driver.
I vastly underestimated how traumatic that was.
They're the first people on scene.
The shit they see,
the brain scattered all over the dashboards and they have to hook it up and
get that shit out of there.
Like,
yeah.
And no one looks at tow truck drivers and calls them like our heroes or
whatever,
but well,
they're out there making the traffic flow again.
Yeah.
That's traumatic,
but it's not.
Workers as heroes either. They're cleaning up the traffic flow again. Yeah, that's traumatic, but it's not. No one looks at the sewage workers as heroes either.
They're cleaning up messes, okay?
Meanwhile, Lieutenant Dan's out there losing his leg fighting the VC.
Okay, he's a hero.
Does that make a crab fisherman a hero?
Is he out there losing his hand, getting it squished between giant cages?
But he's not doing that for you.
He's doing it for Taylor, mostly.
Yeah, and that guy is a
hero by the way just injecting that in there yeah i don't think i don't like this particular
dangerous job comes with fucking blow jobs for the rest of your life and housing and money and
it's not really the danger of it though it's that like you're working for the government to go fight
their battle and when your mind is broken because like you're going to go into a disgusting horrible
scene as a tow truck driver is different than going somewhere like where you might get shot
as a combat soldier and so like yeah like if you put your life and your mental health for the rest
of your life because that ptsd like they're not going to be normal at 50 like they're going to
deal with that forever and so yeah the government needs to be there
and so many jobs who would want to join the military like i if i were 18 there is zero
percent chance you could talk me into the military no chance really because i see how like look how
many fucking homeless people are military people look at how badly they're treated i talked to my
friends who who deal with the va and they say it's an absolute nightmare.
They go through hell and they're,
they're not taken care of in a,
in a timely way.
Like,
no,
they're not taken care of in the right way.
So why would you volunteer?
This is their lifetime of free healthcare.
They don't,
they're not satisfied with it.
They don't get nearly as much as you think.
And the,
and the free healthcare is such where it's like wait in line for months.
Like it's not, it's not a great service i i have a lot
of friends are in the military and they none of them are like oh it rocks it's great it's super
responsive and easy like i also have a lot of friends in the military who you know present in
ex-military and i'm it seems like a hundred percent of them get a lifetime of awesome benefits.
Woody likes turning people's benefits off.
I've noticed that.
Yeah, that money needs to go to Ukraine.
He's always talking about how the farmers need their money cut off,
how the military needs it. You would not get voted in.
Yeah, right.
You're like, all right, look, first of all,
y'all farmers down south, y'all need –
I don't know why I'm giving you the Southern accent.
I guess because you would pander.
That's what you do. You New Jersey panther.
You'd do a bad southern accent.
But so long as I talk like this
while I take away your benefits,
you'll love me.
You're like Hillary Clinton where you're like,
I like hot sauce.
Absolutely.
I would just do terrible accents.
This is my Mexican accent.
You'd be like,
thank you for coming to the
rally.
I guess I just wonder,
I ask the question,
is a lifetime of free benefits
a fair deal?
No, I don't think so.
What is it that they do that is so different
that it's like, like oh but it's traumatic
yeah tow truck drivers traumatic emt i think they should get health care for poor people get
health care for free lifetime and they didn't fight afghanistan do they some do yeah depends
where you are but that's medicare that's not well yeah but but but you know not everyone know that
is that true is that how that works? You get free healthcare, Medicare
pays for it? If you're low enough income,
Medicaid will step in
and help you. No, Medicaid.
No, Medicaid.
They both have roughly the same letters.
They are similar letters. They sound very similar.
I mean, our healthcare system fucking
sucks because
Medicaid is for the poor.
We're talking about the poor.
There it is. Care is for the old. Cage is for the poor we're talking about the yeah medicaid yeah there it
is cares for the old cage is for the poor i didn't know that i don't think we should be
every fucking uh army man soldier for life um i think that if they uh get their legs blown off
we need to take care of that get them a good leg not some wooden peg or anything too but also
they don't need to be like the blade runner or anything on the,
either.
Um,
I don't know why my boy had like quarters of hand for the cars.
I'm a generous man.
Multiple hooks.
You need a bronze hook,
a hook for like your wedding,
like a gold hook.
It's a corkscrew.
Yeah.
Yeah.
You want like an iron hook for,
you know,
I mean,
motorcycle riding.
I'm with it.
I got you.
Custom eye patches.
Clearly you need a
taxpayer
funded parent. I'm there.
We're phasing out the VA in favor of
swag bags when you get back
from Afghanistan.
Wow. AirPods
for my one ear.
Mostly pencils. Colored pencils pencils though they're cool there's a ring doorbell
ring doorbell so that you don't leap up in the night with your gun
we got your ring doorbell no yeah go earn your money. We got you.
We got you lots of machines that pop out.
We got you the Billy Mouth Bass.
We got you a jack-in-the-box.
We got you jack-in-the-box.
We got you fireworks.
We got you a car.
A brand new car that backfires.
We gave all your friends and family fireworks, too.
Guess what?
Fireworks for your whole neighborhood.
Every kid in the neighborhood is going to be saying,
thank you, private Tony for the fireworks.
And guess what?
I told every one of them in celebration of you
to set them off throughout the night.
Superfine soldier.
Terrified.
Which branch would you join?
You got to sign up tomorrow,
Taylor.
The war is beginning.
We're going to be doing battle with the Italians once again,
surprise,
surprise.
And,
and you're going to need to join up.
Yep.
Yes,
we are.
We're,
we're taking them down from Sicily to Rome.
Every Italian has to,
the Vatican is actually where they're,
they're holding out over rome and
we're putting the theme park there america style no so so the uh the catholic church took over the
entire city of italy um nation of italy and uh yes and and and now we have to invade yes so we're
fighting the pope's forces all right so we need to be a war we need to bring some stuff with magic
resistance number one shit yeah. Yeah, obviously.
I can't join the Air Force. That would be my number one pick,
obviously, but
they don't let you in if your eyes aren't
good. They don't let you fly
the planes if your eyes aren't good.
They got plenty of shit you can do.
Oh, I don't have to pick a combat position?
Okay, well then,
fuck, you get paid the most in the Air Force.
What's the easiest Air force thing what do you man flag man i'm chief flag man of the easier than that my my
brother-in-law was in the air force this was his job he sat at a like office chair and he looked at
satellite pictures and he circled things that he thought were interesting like to intelligence
and then he handed the pictures back that was that that that he thought were interesting, like to intelligence.
And then he handed the pictures back.
And that was that, that,
that,
that's what I want to do.
He's a hero.
You can't,
you're,
you're immediately not going to be able to do that.
Can't do please.
Oh,
we got,
we got to go over here with two good eyes.
And then we got Taylor.
That just means I'm looking closer. you got private squinty eye over
is your vision completely corrected can you read yeah you like reading your vision must be very
good corrected it's uh it's it's not quite 2020 with these glasses i need to go get new ones i'm
probably like 2030 2040 but no i can read just fine i can you know there are people out there who have actual
20 20 vision you know we're looking for missiles sir i know that's what i'm looking i can be
correct okay this isn't where's waldo we're looking for the rockets i will say i when i get my eyes
tampered with and my glasses fixed i have 20 20 for probably six months until it phases out again and it starts
to get a little worse and so honestly it's been about a year and a half so yeah i'm definitely
not that trails off toward the end do you like your vision a little fuzzy taylor do you have
a preference for that no i prefer it to be crisp every time i put my contacts back in after wearing
glasses for a long time i'm like i forgot about how great periphery is. Like, because some people with like eyes that aren't that bad can kind of
read out of their periphery. But like, to me, everything's fuzz outside of my glasses zone.
Yeah. So like, and because of the way it's warped, like I have a set side monitor here.
If I go like that to read Twitter, which is open, I can't because I'm looking through the gaps and
it's not the right angle. I have to turn like that
I can't imagine
Extra good Kyle. Do you have 20 20 years it's something better than that. Um, it's something better than that It's like 2010 2015. I can usually read the bottom row from like several steps
Not the bottom row of the like second from bottom, third from the bottom or something like that.
It's like 2010, 2015
depending on when I've done it.
Do you know when people go to the eye doctor?
Do you go?
When I go to the doctor,
they always test your vision.
I think I read
better than the 2020 at one point
in my life, but that had been
gone for a while and during my
30s and most of my 40s i actually preferred uncorrected vision like jackie called it woody
vision like everything's a little softer the world's a little happier like all the harsh edges
and sharp like if you look at a tree and there's like all those leaves with the brutal edges
nah mine would just like a like a watercolor version a little better
like a soap opera camera
yeah
I preferred Woody vision
but then it got to be too much where it's like
you know the printing on everything nowadays
is so small
this new god damn wavy
font
have you noticed the planet's not as well lit
as it once was it's surely not me
yeah i can tell like i really need to get back to the eye doctor when i'm driving at night and my
because my left eye is astigmatism and i get the the crosses and the stars around every single
light and it's it's to the point now where like they're big fucking shiny orbs. And so I really need to get back in there, but like for day-to-day stuff,
like I'm good. Like I can, I can read, I was going to say, I could read that container of
weed. I can't, so I can't read which one that is, but that's pretty far away. It's on the way
other side of my desk. That's like four feet from here. Just take my word for it. No one,
no one could read these tiny things from there
but yeah i always was jealous of like people who didn't need any sort of eye corrective things
because it was so part of my life since i was five and six that like i never really experienced like
i have no memory of not needing glasses like i needed it always like i was one of those kids
that like when they gave
me glasses i was like oh my god like because that's how it like started is i would like i
wasn't paying attention in kindergarten i wasn't learning or like doing anything i was like
pretend i was memorizing the little pamphlets instead of learning how to read because i
couldn't see anything that was happening on the board and then they fixed my eyes and i you know
they took me out of the retard class like they gave me your spot
yeah it turns out you recorded it when they finally gave you glasses it's probably one of those
yeah like it's like one of those videos on youtube wherever where the kids like
but i saw one the other day where like i don't know how the kid was but he was like 10
11 or something and they gave him color for the first time and i was like first of all dude
how have you how are you just not getting these i get the six hundred dollars let's say you're
incredibly low income oh my god if you tell me hey kyle i know you can't see color you're you're
six hundred dollars away you better believe i'm selling lemonade yeah begging because you've heard
about colors and you got you gotta want to know dude this kid started crying and hugging his parents and thanking them for the gift of color oh how sweet it was super sweet i felt so
bad i was like shit i didn't know that little kid needed color we could have hooked him up with some
color i wish i knew if his experience of color was what we get all the time right like the idea
is like what you people have been living like this the whole time
meanwhile it's the unedited hobbit footage where it's like just everything is neon
like i i've thought about that too like with everything how do you know other people perceive
what you perceive internally the same externally because it's there's no real way to know but like that that has got to be
fucking kind of scary too to like see color after not seeing anything like that at all
it'd be like a reveal that nothing you saw was as it actually was like you haven't perceived
anything accurately ever have you ever seen the movie Pleasantville?
That sounds familiar.
That's where...
The chick learns to masturbate.
There is a part where a woman learns to masturbate.
She masturbates for the first time.
It's the core of the movie, according to me.
It's the core of the movie.
After that, it falls off.
What it is, is it's these people
in a 1950s sitcom sort of universe and and
intense feelings make them like turn like like turn into colored people and there is a part
it's a bit of a you know a little little nod at the end of the movie everyone's played by wesley
snipes it's pretty cool the girl has turned colorful and i think i can't
remember who it is the actress i know toby mcguire's in there i think but uh but i think they call her
that colored girl at one point and she's a white person but but she's not in black and white anymore
so she has red and colors yeah it's it's a fun little movie i like that movie reese witherspoon
that's it yeah yeah yeah Maybe I'll check it out.
I have to absolutely punish myself
30% watching the rest of this last season
of Walking Dead.
This is unreal, dude.
Honestly, it's unreal how bad this show is.
I'm so glad you're watching it. if you put me in charge of it and said
taylor i want you to fuck this up it would be a better product like some of the dialogue is so
bad because i have my own theory the the the stakes surrounding the zombies are so profoundly
low that they have to manufacture every bit of danger around them.
Like I watched some scene last night and in fairness, I am not paying great attention to this.
I'm doing other stuff.
But like they were on some train car trying to get somewhere.
And, you know, Negan and Maggie are having their little spats and bickers and everything.
And like some dude on their team who's like what Kyle calls a red shirt or a blue shirt or whatever on Star Trek, who's like he's outside the train car.
And there's zombies outside the train car.
Hundred yards back.
And, you know, the speed of these zombies, it's embarrassingly slow.
And this guy is banging on this door going, let me in, let me in.
And everyone's just calmly like looking at maggie like let's let this totally competent
bitch like what she think and she's like we don't have this is how she delivers it we don't have the
bullets to clear them we don't have the bullets to clear them i could have opened and shut that
like a goddamn revolving door 15 times in that sentence and this dude is still banging on there
begging for his life and you know what it is in there and watch
him for 30 more seconds and then he
steps and then he takes out a knife looking all
serious and he goes
in the chest and he goes
let me tell you what
I think he's slowly eaten
with plenty I think there's a real disconnect
between the writers and the people who who turn the the screenplay into visuals like i bet the writers
were like described a scene in which they don't have the bullets to clear a man look at look how
thick they are there must be 8 000 of them and uh oh man look at look at look at that huge ravine
that's right there to the left isn't it isn't it deep and chasm like but you couldn't afford to do
any of that so they had to go on some railroad tracks here in georgia about 30 minutes from me
and and they didn't have 8 000 zombies they had 18 and so it's like come on man like do we need y'all y'all can clearly like beat zombies
up barehanded at this point you're so good like rustle up some sticks you i saw you throw a rock
earlier and kill one like yeah yeah just a little effort what's funny is over so at first daryl has
the crossbow okay cool and then someone else gets like a bow and arrow. You're like, all right. And someone
else is like, I'm kind of a Morningstar
guy. Before long, there's like
ninja stars. Who's those
ninja stars at the beginning of the season?
Oh!
Someone threw shuriken?
Are you serious?
Dude, I...
You would never throw shuriken.
There is a scene
in this fucking show where they are defending against the Dude, I would never throw shuriken. There is a scene.
There is a scene in this fucking show where they are defending against the Whisperers,
which is the dumbest group of low IQ individuals in the history of the planet.
And for some reason, Negan fucks this bald woman.
And there's a lot of them.
And that's very disjointed.
I didn't care for it.
It didn't make any sense.
This woman, it doesn't make any sense.
She's the whole time like, I'm an alpha.
And he's like, oh, I'm fucking Negan.
And then they like have sex.
It's like, this fuck is retarded.
It's so goddamn stupid.
This scene.
I bet it took eight hours to amount to what he just said.
It literally did.
Full episodes, I just surmise.
The final Whisperer push they they're sending all their minions like because they depending on the scene
they can either only whisper around the dead or they can yell loudly and still not be attacked
by them like that's what it needs and so they're attacking and it's just a big horde of zombies and these fuckers like rick's former team they've got roman style shields
and shit and they're in formation like a bunch of fucking losers going like forward and it's like
do you know how much fucking time you're wasting just everyone get up to the front and go like
this don't even put any mustard in it don't even put any mustard in it they've been dead for 12
years just a little pop just a little pop pop pop that's all you need you put me in charge of
this and i tell that dude with one arm i kill him i kill the one-armed guy the guy fucking hate him
he put a what is the ball with the spikes called a mace like he's got a mace for an end now that
guy's fist that guy fucking sucks and and no one has good decision making. The leader, frankly, the only person who's had a good idea in the past entire season has been Negan.
Can I say that crossbow frustrated me from day goddamn one?
From the first time I saw that fucking crossbow, I thought it was...
Because people don't know how arrows work?
Because people don't know how fucking arrows work.
Because people don't know how fucking arrows work.
All right, let me tell you how arrows work.
That crossbow shoots 400 feet per second. people don't know how fucking arrows work all right let me tell you how arrows work that that
crossbow shoots 400 feet per second okay that that bolt will go through your head and just
skip along through the woods just to pause you there i didn't know this it would my head i'm a
healthy uh fully living person it'll pierce both sides of my skull it will it will go
through a full-grown deer skip along through the woods and you're like where'd my arrow go
fuck oh it's oh there it is ruined on the ground like i would shoot i want my first year i shot
uh aluminum arrows because that was the standard at the time.
My second year, I shot carbon fiber because they weren't absurdly expensive.
Carbon fiber stands up a little bit better, but they'll still snap and break off and stuff.
Aluminum, if it hits anything, warps a little and it's no longer an effective arrow.
But the carbon fiber ones, I saw them snap plenty of times go it'd go through the deer and maybe hang a little bit but it's almost always going straight through
a goddamn deer so a person especially a person's head like it's just going on through isn't it
ain't stopping yeah and you're wrecking every arrow because you're losing every arrow you can
shoot someone in the skull and be like thank god i got my arrow back like it's it's gonna break
and if you shoot an
arrow out of a crossbow that strong like if you take a carbon fiber arrow that's like just a little
like not even perceptively a little broken like and you try and shoot it again through that it
could explode like it probably could just dangerous though winter apart go in your eyes the whole the
whole bow comes apart in a violent kind of way in the the middle of a fight it could smack you in the eye and
suddenly you're getting beaten to death because you can't
see very well. It's strings
and fiberglass whipping around everywhere.
I always thought that too.
The bow and arrow is the perfect weapon for people who don't know
how bow and arrows work.
My problem with Walking Dead towards the end
is the wrong people start.
It could have been the Negan show.
Maybe he's's pretty good
character yeah he's uh daryl's a terrible actor people don't even recognize it but he's a god
awful terrible actor who just plays pouty or something and always bummed out he's always
bummed out he's pouty his lines are terrible yeah he's he's awful but like the idea of daryl is good
but the execution is terrible and people don't notice.
There was no idea of Daryl, by the way.
He was supposed to go away,
but they loved that guy's performance so much.
You put that perfectly there.
Like, when Daryl comes on screen,
I want to believe that a fun character
has just entered the screen.
But every time it's like, oh, no,
he's just sad about something
and someone's going to ask him something and I'm going to go,
oh, what's Daryl's answer?
And then Daryl's going to go, hmm.
Yeah, Daryl was never a good character.
The characters that always interest me in that show,
Shane was a very compelling character.
Rick, super compelling character.
Carl, don't care, don't care. Never cared. Don't like
child actors unless they're the best of the best
and he wasn't even close. Fuck Carl.
Didn't care. But once you killed him off,
I gotta quit watching the show because what's even the fucking
point anymore? All of those,
that woman who couldn't close her mouth, I wanted
her to die so many times. Yeah, Andrea
or Andrea or something. Yeah, yeah.
You know who's good? It goes against the grain.
Judith. I like Judith whenever she's on screen. You probably didn't get this far. Carl had a kid. andrea yeah yeah you know who's good it goes against the grain judith i like judith whenever
she's on screen you probably didn't get this far carl had a kid that kid was born and laurie the
wife died during childbirth well you get to seasons like 10 and higher and judith is like
eight or something and she's been raised in this zombie apocalypse world since the beginning she's
been shooting as long as she's
been walking and she's actually pretty fucking competent and she makes good decisions and she
saves adults sometimes yeah not by like muscly like going in there like tarzan and just you know
at the what's the serenity the end where river just wrecks all the reapers she never does that
but if you're in a precarious situation and she has a rifle she
hits their head boom fair understood yeah that makes sense um well i didn't like like as far as
the judith shit like and you wouldn't like this kyle like the uncomfortable deference they give
to this six-year-old about serious conversations where like they'll be like there's a problem on
the there's zombies again or there's an issue here we can't let be like, there's a problem on the, there's zombies again,
or there's an issue here.
We can't let this group in.
There's a rapist among them.
And she'll be like,
I know we have to let them in.
And everyone's like nodding sagely.
Like,
Oh wow.
She's right.
Like,
and it's like,
Whoa,
Whoa.
Like you guys all are maybe 18 months older than the last time you
let a band of murderers and rapists in and like like i'm gonna tell you like after watching after
watching the first like three four seasons of that show i i i knew right then all right we're
gonna have like a core group of friends in this apocalypse. And we're not going to like let anybody in.
And,
and,
and we can't trust women either.
Like we trust just dogs,
like real life.
That just dogs will be our friends.
And like the people we have here and everybody else,
we probably need to stalk them and then kill them when we're sure we can get
away with it.
Like,
like cause,
cause just befriending or walking up to anybody,
everybody who's still alive is alive because they're a killer.
Everybody in that world has used whatever innate talent they have
to survive in a vicious kind of way.
There aren't victims anymore,
unless there's a protector right next to them.
Elliot, is that his name?
Or Ezekiel?
Ezekiel.
I'm not going for Ezekiel.
He's got the bullets. He has long hair.
He looks terrible.
He's a voyeur. He watched Abraham
and whatever. Eugene.
Eugene is who I'm going for.
That guy plays a coward.
Eugene's character is a coward.
I get it.
Oh my god. 12 years into it
he's still afraid of a a single zombie right it's been
established you can poke one in the head with a pencil and they drop like flies and he's still
like can barely bring himself to do the most mundane combat stuff no one's beaten him up yet
for being kind of insufferable like he's interesting sometimes but when he walks in a
room and is like i just wanted to make it entirely clear that my presupposition regarding this
situation is that is it it is a bad idea and it's like shut the fuck up dude shut the fuck up get to
the point i at least be funny you're gonna do a pretty good impression, by the way. I thought the idea... I thought the idea...
I'll tell you.
I thought him making all the bullets
explode in the guns and hurt everybody
was...
They didn't test the bullets at all.
Not one.
They didn't fire a single shot.
They all got to the bad bullet at the same time.
That means every bullet was bad.
And they all fired at the same time.
Well, I think there was a good amount of war and battle prior to that.
Right?
No.
No, no.
So here's the scene.
That was the first shipment of his bullets.
It's the end.
It's the end of the season.
It's right before Rick cuts Negan's throat.
And all of Negan's guys have all of Rick's guys at gunpoint.
And it's like, oh, shit. They have the high ground, there's more of them and they all pull the
trigger at the same time and either maim or kill themselves
instantly because every bullet Eugene made was an exploding bullet.
Every one of them had to have been. Except for the one shot
that Negan tested. The camera pans the fucking group as each of them in
succession is maimed. Hands
blowing off, faces getting half blown off.
But the previous 40 minutes of the show
didn't involve any gunfire?
I don't know.
No, Negan,
it was a whole thing about like, we need
this shipment of bullets by then and Eugene
is like, it will be done
for you by tomorrow. And then like,
he comes back and Neggan shoots one bullet and is
like that's quality assurance and then they go and do it and and they all shoot at the same time
fucking red coat style yeah like every single one of them it it's a really it's just stupid
like i'm watching right now doctor who and i don't know it's i think i'm in season 10
Who and I don't know it's I think I'm in season 10
Oh
That show ever and I was
Okay, so I would disagree with what Taylor
Just said Doctor Who had some good years
The Matt Smith is were outstanding
Who's the other well
Loved Doctor Who he's the only
Doctor Who there is
The I only like Matt Smith
Okay, there's another one that's also widely
Beloved and there's an argument amongst Doctor Who fans as to who's better.
And they were fantastic.
And then it got replaced by the old Doctor, the one that plays guitar and wears Ray-Bans.
Sure.
And he's not a good Doctor.
But the companion, Clara, was outstanding.
She was maybe one of the best companions.
Well, they've replaced Clara with bill who it's a boy's
name but it's a girl she's the worst companion and now i'm black suffer yeah i'm suffering through
the worst companion and the worst doctor combo just like wait the doctor's a lady now right
i haven't made it to that doctor yet yeah there's like three years a lady doctor ahead of you so
good luck with that.
Taylor, if you ever want to watch it, it's a Lady Doctor.
So if you ever want to watch that, there's Matt Smith.
The way it works, obviously, whenever it's time to get rid of a doctor,
he transforms and sort of gives his life to save the day.
And in doing so, he reincarnates essentially into a new form.
That's a,
got a lot of the same qualities and then none of the same qualities in a
new body.
Um,
that's how this alien life form works.
And,
uh,
and so the Matt Smith years are very self-contained story that you could
watch without the previous year or the,
the,
the years after him.
Uh, they're really fucking good. I love, I like the chick who plays, uh, Amelia pond. without the previous year or the years after him.
They're really fucking good.
I like the chick who plays Amelia Pond,
that redhead from Jumanji,
one of the shorts.
Oh, with the big ass?
Oh, yeah.
She's even younger than in Jumanji in this,
and she's just palling around with Doctor Who all over the world.
She's the girl who waited.
It's fun.
Seasons 10 through 13 are amazing.
They are the seasons.
I just looked it up.
And Kyle likes seasons 13, I guess.
Is it?
No, no, no.
I must be counting Doctors.
The 10th through 13th Doctors are very good.
Yeah, so I think the counting of the seasons is
difficult because it goes back to the 50s, I think.
There's a doctor named Christopher Eccleston. I guess
that's the actor who plays the 9th doctor, Christopher Eccleston. He only played
one season. He was really good. Then came David Tennant. Some people think he's the best
doctor. Most agree he was very good then came david tennant some people think he's the best doctor uh most agree he was very good then came matt smith some people think he's the best doctor
now i'm on peter capaldi and he's not by the way these this is the modern doctor who it goes back
to the black and white i watched it as a kid i really enjoy one of one of the best moments we've
talked about it before but quickly like matt sm Smith's doctor who like calls the alien.
He just saved the world from back.
He's like,
get your ass back here.
He's like,
he's like,
why,
why do you think this planet's never been taken,
been destroyed?
And they like,
like have this flashback of all the enemies of the planet.
And like,
it's,
but they have flashbacks of all the doctor who's,
and I'm like,
holy shit,
this is a black and white,
like,
like how long,
how old is this show?
It's like General Hospital.
Yeah, they can all deliver.
Even the doctor that I don't like, Peter Capaldi,
when it comes time to deliver a Doctor Who speech,
he's got it.
He can dress down a bad guy.
Yeah, I like there's a little bit of a like reverse time thing going on with the Matt Smith thing and and River, which is very cool.
There's a nice little twist when you finally get to the end of the doctor's tale because it's kind of a kind of a loop or Matt Smith's doctor anyway.
I think it's not a spoiler to explain that.
I forget why, but River goes backwards in time and Doctor Who goes forwards.
So at the beginning dr who is like who
is this chick and she's like ah we're married with this for that but whenever he asked for
details she's like spoilers you know and he she doesn't tell him the life he's about to go through
well i got to the other side of it where he sees her for the last time and she's like who are you
i get to see the other
side where she doesn't know this guy.
He's like, you don't know me?
We were married.
It's very cool. Then who she is,
her parents
and everything. Very cool. I love the Matt
Smith Doctor Who, but I don't like
the rest of that shit. I can't do the other
guys. I don't like that old guy.
It's kind of wackadoo. Not into it. I'm certainly not going to be into
the modern Doctor Who.
They tried to make the old guy cool
because he plays the electric guitar and wears Ray-Bans.
There's a reason old people can't pull off
some of these things.
You look like you're trying to be somebody else.
Who's the oldest guy who's like
actually kind of stayed hip with it like is it snoop dogg because he was actually who came to
my head too yeah because i think snoop dogg's gotta be in his like 60 is he 60 i think of
snoop dogg is 55 60 something like that 51 oh all Oh, all right. Well, never mind.
I'm way off.
Never mind.
I think of him as like a Howard Stern question mark.
No, he's, no, I wouldn't think so.
I mean, his whole, he's got a real backwards view on like media in general, just because
he has a monopoly on his own little, little corner of, of that industry.
And he doesn't seem to really stay up with technology
you know he's he's kind of a agoraphobic so that's part of it staying up with cat man
i thought that's what we're talking about who was like yeah it's always like staying like relevant
and like not relevant but someone who's staying up to date with like the world in general and
like technology and uh yeah you know like our parents our parents couldn't figure out how to
change the input on tvs for a while like what's the thing that that we aren't going to understand
or be able to do was it crypto like i didn't i didn't even want to learn but i think that'd be
a bit i think that was just that generation's um um pyramid scheme multi-level marketing i think that's
multi-level marketing for smart people um so so i think i'm glad i reported that i know a lot of
smart people made a bunch of money on it and a lot of smart people lost their fucking lives in it
like i it was always so intimidating i always had the same perspective of like that's for the birds
i don't know i don't know what to do in that space.
And I'm not confident in myself to make the right decision.
Bitcoin's currently at 27,000.
Does that seem right?
Yeah.
Sounds good.
Is it time to buy that like medium part where no one's paying attention to it?
I don't care anymore.
It's time to buy GameStop.
What are you doing
oh oh my god is it 2021 i i didn't know damn that would have been so great oh
did you see that video i sent uh in whatsapp me taking the wasp out yeah i didn't know oh
yeah he was up on the fucking blinds and i fucking roasted him it takes like half a second like half a second
with the fucking fucking hammer of god here and he's just roasted out of the sky yeah yeah that's
three of them i've taken out he just like dropped immediately yeah my uh my my pc tower is right by
the window so i leave the window open if it's like cool day. The wasps come in and they don't get out
because I laze those bitches. It's so fun. I do need glasses, though.
Yes, you do need glasses.
I pushed back and joked that
I'm too tough to burn my eyes,
but the truth is they did make a good impression.
what tough to burn my eyes yeah but but the truth is they did make a good impression yeah all right i need glasses they're like yeah if you just they're like if you just shine it in your eye
for a second now you can't see out of that part of your eye the reflection off glass will ruin
your eye and i'm like that's pretty much exactly what i do with yeah you're right guys i'm not
doing this yeah i've been i put that refractory tip on it
and I'm just shining the whole living room
haphazardly.
It makes like a thousand lasers.
You get a whole pocket full of them.
1.6 fucking watts, folks.
Is that what it is? 1.6 watts?
Yeah, because that YouTube channel tests them
because I think
100 milliwatts
I think is the the limit could be
wrong might be 50 uh-huh and this thing is 1.6 watts so way way beyond like like what they're
supposed to be selling on amazon for sure don't shine it at a fucking aircraft or you'll be a
goddamn felon like me uh that laser for killing Aptasia, the one
I didn't buy, six watts.
Holy shit.
Six watts.
How much do you get one of those now?
$172.
I don't think it's fun though. It only works underwater.
Oh.
You need something to refuck.
Maybe if you shine it through
some water at someone.
You need a water lens to focus the beam.
Someone showed me where some guy on YouTube
took a whole bunch of super powerful lasers
and they combined them into one laser,
but they were infrared lasers,
so the death beam was invisible.
So he could just be walking around killing
people, and it would just be an invisible
ray burning them up, and no one would
understand what was happening to them. Jesus Christ!
Yes. He has to film it
with an infrared camera
to show the evil that he's doing
with the ray. Someone
linked it. I didn't watch it. I need to find that video. That sounds
cool. Yeah. All right. Well, we're going to go
do the hangout with the $50 patrons. Yeah, uh y'all have a y'all have a good day
everyone very good pkn 449