Painkiller Already - PKN 482

Episode Date: November 15, 2023

BKN 482. Hey boys. Hello there. How are ya? I'm good. Have a good nap? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm good. I just, it's like I rolled out of bed. I could see in the hair.

Feeling real well rested. Shout out Jackie. Big ups to Jackie today. I was about 10 minutes late everybody and I just fucked up I have no excuse he hasn't opened a message in like 30 hours I don't know man it's not looking good you never know with Woody he could have gotten into some wild shit

flying around yesterday and we might be low on the totem pole of who gets the news I had a flu shot and a COVID shot today and I did nap this afternoon might be related. I don't know. But yeah.

Yep. I'm, I'm, I've never gotten a flu shot. Not since I was a kid. Really? Yeah. Yeah.

Pure blood. Pure blood. Yes. I sell my semen for a bucko box. I know. How much? Yeah. For friends and family discount.

Woody, did you follow any of the political stuff today? There's a couple of fights. Oh, yes. Yeah. Yeah. So there was that Republican from Oklahoma that wanted to fight the Teamster. Oh, the Teamster wanted to fight him until it was time to step up and be a man about it.

Yeah, yeah. He was like anytime, anywhere or anytime, anyplace. Yeah. On Twitter he was. People aren't on the top of the story. He's an American United States Senator. Sometimes when I see wacky shit going on i'm like oh this is some state senator like like i look i i used to have like toy around wanting to be in politics

i looked at how much state senators made in north carolina it's like fourteen thousand dollars a year like this isn't even a job plus benefits it's something for rich plus the per diem you're right it just rockets it up to like 17. If it had health insurance, though, that would be like that would actually have value. But and it might. I'm not sure. But this is a U.S. Senator, you know, one of the 100, like the real thing. And the guy said any place or any time, any place.

And he later clarified, I meant to have a coffee and discuss. No, that's not what any time, any place means have a coffee and discuss. No. That's not what anytime, anyplace means. We all know what it means. No. My hair is looking awful. The guy's a Teamster boss, and they're going back and forth on Twitter, and the Teamster boss says this to the senators. Anytime, anyplace, we can settle this.

Well, luck would have it. They're having a hearing today, and both of them are there. And the UFC fighting senator of Oklahoma, which is cool as shit, by the way. Let's go. He's not literally a UFC fighter. Former MMA fighter, I guess, is what I should have said. Oh, he can fight. He's an actual skilled fighter. He is a big, scary man.

The Teamster had made fun of him standing on an Apple box at events, though, of course. Because he's a shorter fellow. Probably a 155er. Anyway, he's like, hey, he has the mic. He has the floor. The Senator does. he's like hey you uh he has the mic he has the floor the senator does he's like you know you tweeted to me uh this and that the other any place any time well right here's a place right now's the time get your butt up here big boy and the guy goes you get your butt

down here big boy and the senator stands up and starts moving. And everybody starts yelling. And everybody's like, hang on a minute. He's like, sit down, sit down. I didn't realize for sure that it was the United States Senate until I saw Bernie Sanders next to him being like, we're not going to do violence right here on the Senate floor. Shut up, loser.

Bernie was rolling his sleeves up. You could tell he wanted some. It looks like this guy, first of all, here on the center. Bernie was rolling his sleeves up. You could tell he wanted some. It looks like this guy, first of all, the awesome fighter named Mark Wayne Mullen. I love that. Mark Wayne, one name. Not a dash, just thrown together. And he's 3-0 in the

Extreme Fighting League from 2006 and 2007. 185. So I was pretty sure the senator would win before I understood his fighting background. Just looking at the physiques, I was like, well, the teacher's not a total pushover. He's not like some femboy type dude.

No, he's a big man. Yeah, but also I was like, I don't know, I think I like the senator. He just looks like he's kept in better shape. Oh, yeah. And if you're trained in something. Now that I understand that. This is like a guitarist and a regular person in a guitar battle.

It doesn't matter. He hasn't really played since 2007. He's going to beat you. Like, if you don't know what you're doing. So that was a pretty embarrassing moment for America. That's pretty funny. But then, like, 15 minutes later, Kevin McCarthy, the guy who was the Speaker of the House as of a month ago,

elbowed another senator in the kidneys, apparently like blindsiding him in a hallway. And the offended senator, the one who gets struck, says he's like, I chased him. And he ran like a little boy, hiding behind his mama's skirt, with his security and his entourage and hid somewhere. Are you hurt, Senator? Yeah, I'm hurt. Hit me with a clean shot to the kidneys. You plan to press charges? Nah, nothing like that.

They need to leak the video of it so we can see. Those two are both Republican senators. Yeah. Now, the guy that was hit in the kidneys recently voted out Kevin McCarthy who was Speaker of the House. So Matt Gaetz of course was sort of the ringleader of the Republicans that didn't like Kevin McCarthy. And this guy was one of his followers I guess. I don't know how to better describe it. He was one of the eight that voted against Kevin McCarthy

to keep his speakership yeah so uh those two are don't like each other republicans are kind of wildly dysfunctional at least in the house in the senate there should be more fighting with politicians like kyle and i were talking about this before and and the andrew jackson era was pretty cool for that reason because they could be like you know president jackson i don't appreciate your comments on the floor and he's like want to shoot me and and then they'd be like well i don't know and he's like dual accepted and as the president you are locked in also tomorrow at noon like like he died right here right now senator well i don't have my dueling pistols where we'll use mine presidential dueling pistols out

here boy yeah probably back then he had 12 rounds in him when he died like he he's true yeah andrew jackson had 12 old-timey bullets inside him at time of death so he what if they have bb gun pistol tools i mean i don't know what kind of round it was. And those pistols didn't have a lot of pop to them. And my guess has always been that they put a light load in the dueling pistols. Because oftentimes the duel was just about serving honor. And basically, you offended me and I can't walk away.

Okay? But we're not going to have a fist fight here like brutes in the street because we're gentlemen. So to serve honor, I have to challenge you to the death and you now have to accept for the same reasons that I had to challenge you. And now, man, I wish we hadn't done this.

Can we just stand out by the tree over there and shoot our guns in the air and everybody will hear that we had a gunfight over this shit and it'll be straight? Yeah. And that happens like most of the time. That's how Alexander Hamilton died. I know this from the musical,

but yeah, he, he knew he had accepted a duel with someone who was much better at dueling. So they suggested that he fire his gun in the air. And like, as a gentleman, the other guy was expected to also fire his gun in the air, but that's not what he went with.

He was like, you know, you challenge me to a duel and I tend to win these things. So you're just yet another one on my list. What an idiot. If I'm in a duel and the other guy's like, let's handle this honorably and both fire into the air. Like you first. You have to do this first. It's your idea because i don't trust you not to kill me you can't go into a duel and be like i'm i'm you know hairy honorable bang see

i shot it into the air well you shoot it in the air and he's like lining it up right in between your teeth like getting ready to blast you well i think the situation was more like me and john jones getting into a fight and i decide this should be a play fight it's john's like no no so regardless of whether i decided it should be real or play it was still the move to suggest a non-violent fight because i wasn't going to win a real one yeah but you don't spend your no no it does I was saying but you don't spend your load prematurely in a duel until it's like hey everybody we got a hundred witnesses

like everybody agreed and then you shoot up I hear your thoughts and it's hard to argue because he did die from this decision so but it's I also see his side of it where he's like well you know i'm not gonna win a duel so i'm gonna try to make this a non-dual why is it so hard to win a duel we just

we sit here and line our shots up like it's really more about whether the pistol fails or not more than anything okay yes russia how hard is it to win a duel sometimes when i point my gun we're not gonna draw it doesn't hit them this is one of those lame like 18th century duels i i just imagine this being more of uh let's hope the gun goes off and actually shoot straight kind of thing i think there wasn't a draw portion of these duels i'm less impressed now like i thought it was kind of more kind of more wild westy duels no i think we take turns firing like go ahead taylor have at me all right now my turn the same way you fight in the field right remember the like the wars back

then all right red red art red team go ahead and shoot oh all right blue team get ready now i'd treat it i'd treat it like paintball when i was a kid and i was like eight where i'd shoot my load i'd miss and i'd be like this whole this is gay i'm done i quit i would show up with 19 jackets on i would just be knocking on the door fat people like can i borrow your coat yeah this is what i'm cold i wear my lead coat like you're looking like the christmas story kid that's not a lead coat that's your cast iron skillet yeah you just have a bunch of pots and pans like you're sam like the Christmas story kid. That's not a lead coat. That's your cast iron skillet. You just have a bunch of pots and pans like you're Sam on the way to Mordor. Which, by the way, Sam, more powerful than you give credit.

If someone tells me you have to march across the world, I don't bring my cast iron set. But he did. The whole set. He had like a... How much food did he imagine they'd be coming across? He just made that one stew. Like, that was it. Pretty much, yeah.

That, and then they feasted on the lembas bread for a while. But yeah, there should be more dueling in modern politics. I'd be fine with even something muted like arm wrestling, where it'd be like, oh man, this guy's powerful. We can all admire it. And it would be a great way to eliminate elderly people dictating the direction of our country imagine like bernie sanders or biden or feinstein doing like being forced into old democrats there's old republicans oh well then uh fucking the guy who strokes out all the time, that guy, throw him in the mix. Oh, mix Mitch McConnell.

And what if he strokes into perfect? Like, he can't be moved because all his joints locked up. He's like, oh, this guy's better. He spoke today. He seemed fine. You know, like, clearly it wasn't. No, that is a one strike and you're out policy. You can't be doing that shit.

You know he's had two? Yeah, I don't think after the first one, they should have been like, no, you're out, bro. You can't just. that shit. You know he's had two? Yeah, I don't see it. After the first one, they should have been like, no, you're out, bro. You can't just... Who we know about. Because, you know, all the Republicans were like, you can't have Dianne Feinstein.

She's already dead. And it's like, yeah, pretty much. But this guy's stroking out, and this guy's a hundred. He's all right. He's in a level that he is. I saw him speak today. He was talking about, I think they're going to pass a continuation Or something for the budget

I think some of these guys That seem really unimpressive to us Like he stroked out He's old as hell He stutters a little bit Are actually really effective at their jobs They've been doing it for 30 years They have every connection

They know every player They know who's friends with who And how strong that friendship is and what they say in private. And I bet Mitch McConnell is great at his job, even though he seems half with it. Maybe. Yeah. You would hope he is. That's what we hope. We hope that it's like the West Wing.

We hope it's like some really smart well-written political drama behind the scenes and not more like veep i mean it's just stupid people who've lucked into this because they were the pretty kids in high school and and like they got their all of their exams have been taken for them their whole lives and now here they are with their finger on the button i think it's more like adult who cares more about social media and trends than they do about the american way it's not my cup of tea but you got to give mitch mcconnell credit for stacking the supreme court and overturning roe v wade of course you do can you imagine how hard it would be to still be a politician if like you can't form words though like mitch mcconnell can't like be relied

on to speak every time he goes up and talks, he's just... I mean, that would be the perfect cover. Let's do it. Answer for this. Here's a picture of you making sandcastles on Little St. James Island. And he's like... Yeah, I've got my big shovel. Look, honey.

You can say that about... That's where I left it. They let him go. McConnell, Biden, Trump, Fetterman. it they let him mcconnell biden trump fetterman all of these guys can't be relied to like accurately make a point oh trump is way better at speaking no trump is a word salad nonsense person he you're you're crazy he's he's much much better at speaking than john fetterman who's like politics good uh i'm iphone pennsylvania no like first of all federman is practically over that his stroke symptoms like they're kind of gone is he now and uh good for him trump on the

other hand seems to just make less and less sense the more often he talks how many times he has to say obama's president like he's getting who's president wrong is that what he's saying now it's happened like twice in the last week where isn't he saying he said that he beat obama in his 2016 and he said obama's president like is he doing like the exactly eight times eight times it's exactly eight times is he forgetting what he's saying or is he doing like a joe biden's not even president it's the third Obama term. No, it's the other way. It seems like he's up there.

He's up there riffing. And he's clearly thinking about how much he hates Obama. Obama was probably on Dateline the night before or something. He stayed up way too late watching it before court. Dude, he's not over that dinner comment. He'll never be over that. That's the most costly joke in American history. You know, he ran for president twice before that day.

I've often said Trump is super impressive because his first foray into politics was president, and he won. But I didn't realize that was his third time running. When did he run the first time? He ran three elections in a row if i recall correctly like oh like 8 12 and then 16 i think so yeah if you fact check me it's definitely 12 and 16 and i think 8 if i had to guess because it's hard to remember past today um i bet he wanted to be in those races just to pick on obama like the goal was like

let me make it literally my job to fuck with obama for a few months and and because he he's always despised that guy he should have run as a democrat then to try and get in a debate or something oh that's an interesting thing that's happening this time with look you never know what it's going to look like 360 days from now when the election actually happens but there's a lot of talk of like multiple not just just third and fourth party candidates. I know Jill Stein, I think, is getting involved again. Yeah, I know. The Republicans have whittled it down.

I know the black guy from South Carolina, something Scott. He dropped out. Tim Scott. He dropped out. I'm sorry. You were so gone. Tim Scott. He dropped out. I'm sorry. You were so gone.

I don't think we talked about Nikita Tatara Haley's meltdown the other night when that little brown fellow Vivek Ramaswamy. Yeah, I got some spunk. The guy says, American as apple pie. Vivek Ramaswamy. He's more American than

anyone else on that stage. That guy is great. I love that guy. You know what he wants to do? He says fentanyl is the leading cause of death in America. Like, you guys are worried about climate change and this, that, and the other. It's fentanyl. I want to bomb the cartels.

He wants to declare war on the Mexican drug cartels and use the U.S. military to bomb them and kill them and declare them to be terrorists. That's fun. That's one of his things. I mean, you've got to take the fentanyl stuff seriously he went on a lot of people it's coming from china though right he went scorched they don't know so so that's the cartels side of things that that's their version okay i can't possibly know on tv they tell me it's from china but i'm sitting here here in Raleigh. It used to be from China. I know, yeah. Yeah, the deal was it would come from China, go to South America, and then into the United States. But apparently, recently, and again, the cartels deny this. You take the cartels with the words. But apparently, they've been manufacturing there in Mexico is the claim that's been made over the last year or so.

But your little brown fellow went scorched earth first on the whole rnc he called out like the chairwoman of the rnc he talked about you how they're you he's like you've got this lester guy from abc running the republican national conventions he's like that should be joe rogan elon musk and uh who did he say uh i remember those. Tucker Carlson. Tucker Carlson. He said, Joe Rogan, Elon Musk, and Tucker Carlson should run the Republican debates. It'd get 10 times the viewership, and they'd actually ask some questions people care about.

And the crowd goes wild. And Lester's over there like, all right, now, let's keep it civil. And then I guess Nikki Haley had said something to him the previous night. So he got after her. So I guess, you know, TikTok's a security issue, China, et cetera, et cetera. And maybe Nikki Haley had said something about it previous. And he's like, your daughter's on TikTok, Nikki. I think that might be a security issue.

And he starts talking. And she had, you saw her like meltdown break. And when it's her turn to talk, yes, when it's her turn to talk, she's like, you're scum. You saw her like meltdown break. Really? Yes. When it's her turn to talk, she's like, you're scum. Don't you dare bring my daughter into this. It has a fucking meltdown. It looks real bad. Of course, that's been contrasted to.

Wait, you left out my favorite Vivek line, which was, I forget what he was saying about Nikki in particular. Something, maybe it was her support for Ukraine or something, but he's like, you know, you've got these Hawks over here in three inch heels of which there are two of them. He's talking about DeSantis and his lifts. Oh,

okay. That's good. Okay. All right. All right. One point for this guy. Cause that's a really funny thing. Yeah.

When he called out the scent, now DeSantis probably the right move. Didn't't defend himself didn't even acknowledge that he heard it or understood the dig but everyone else did because de santa's and his heels had been going nuts on the internet yeah i gotta admit that we got past me he's in too deep to like take the heels off now like he can't just suddenly go back to being 5'8 or whatever he needs better heels he needs new tech he really is way into... Like, that was such a misplay. He looks like a...

I could not believe the absurdity of his clown shoes when, on the episode, Zach pulled those up. And it's like... I've never seen shoes more obviously not having toes in the end of them. He's pulled a George Costanza. This is like whenorge met that woman wearing the timberland boots and now he can't wear anything else and so when they go to a wedding he spray paint some black yeah the thing is he went too far that's my take on it those um the

desantis lifts are obvious and huge and like you pointed out that because the toe box is empty it it's really obvious but trump wears lifts putin wears lifts and king jung-un wears lifts and people barely talk about them yeah a lot of politicians do because they're reasonable about careful about it we can all you know it's it's like i don't know if somebody asks you how big your dick is like like you know give them another inch you know i don so when i see first of all every single woman has lifts on and we're like look how cool her lifts are but you know you give Trump an extra three quarters of an inch. You give every man three quarters of an extra inch and everybody's happy. Let's all live in a fantasy world where everybody's dicks are three quarters of an inch longer.

Everybody's three quarters of an inch taller and no pussies are huge. I like that. And like, honestly, DeSantis should get fucked because he destroyed that mutually assured destruction that you think every politician, every male politician wasn't wearing a little lift here and there trying to look taller because as much as you might think, like, it's the ideas that matter. No, it's the optics and the height and things like that. It's ingrained into us. You don't want some squirrely little five foot two fat. So leading us. That's why those guys never get elected.

foot two fat. So leading us, that's why those guys never get elected. The only presidents who were short as shit that got elected were so far long ago that it'd be like, no one knew how tall Adams was. No one had any idea. I think I'm, and when you say stuff like that,

my mind starts racing for exceptions. Yeah. I don't know. You know, it's all George Washington was six, three or six, two, which back then two,

two with hippo teeth, slave teeth. I learned that in the... Who is it? Shane Gillis? His comedy stand-up? That's my source. I don't know if it's a good one, but I heard 6'2 also. I like it.

Dude, 6'2 in 1770 is 6'8 now. That's a big dude. Yeah. I love when he talked about it. I don't know how tall carter was but i'm going to the 70s now i bet you have to get back to pre-photography to find someone who's short like like early 1800 well i guess that wasn't pre-photography 510 is not tall by i guess is jimmy carter tall because you know he's the one oh thank you i see i see he's just okay

yeah and he's a sort of a thinner guy too he's a small fellow he's like the smallest you can find in the last is that 30 years yeah yeah yeah james madison 5-4 ben harrison 5-6 martin van buren 5-6 like if these guys would have had photos of themselves plastered on tv none of them would have and even though i would argue five six is the 1850s six foot maybe maybe it's not so bad fdr was like four foot three in the chair though yeah but they'd stretch him out they'd puppeteer him around let's put some penny farting wheels on that baby get up yeah i love it they call me out for lips you ever seen I love that. Have you ever seen the movie? See if they call me out for lips.

Have you ever seen the movie Pearl Harbor? You ever seen the movie Pearl Harbor? Dude, it's awful. It's trash. Please never get sucked into watching this movie. Not a problem. Watch it before Terminator. They take the nation's finest moment, right,

and turn it into this love story, like a love triangle between three very attractive people. We've had better moments than Pearl Harbor. It was a pretty big moment and uh well there's a part where like cuba gooding juniors like black ass gets on the anti-aircraft gun he's like supposed to be mopping up or something but you know it's pearl harbor so all men all hands on deck and he's just like as a kamikaze comes right at him that's a pretty cool scene and then they focus on the doolittle raid a little bit but it's absolutely dreadful it's it's like three fucking hours too i'm trying to remember why i brought this up there

was something about it that was interesting the height maybe the height of the president oh yeah john voight plays fdr and there's a scene where he's they're like mr president it's impossible he's like they told me many things were impossible. And he like muscles himself up to like swayingly stand on two legs there while he tells them to go bomb the shit out of Japan. He said, once you've experimented with another man, you'll always be gay. Move them wrong. He is right on that. Taylor, if you told me you hated broccoli with a passion, but you've never tried broccoli, I wouldn't take your opinion seriously.

So you need to suck a dick. That's fair. That is fair. I can say I don't think I would like that, but you can't possibly know until that dick is sliding up of your tongue and you have to remap your entire idea of who you are as a person oh I thought we were still on the broccoli

a little cheese would help you know in one of those scenarios yeah that's how my parents tricked me into vegetables as a kid huge amounts of cheese on like peas, broccoli. And I was in. I was in.

I don't think I ate broccoli until like three years ago. You had the longest run, like a championship style run where like, I remember once, this was probably five years ago. So you were my age. You're 32. The topic of vegetables comes up and you're like vegetables yeah don't touch this stuff and i'm like oh ha ha that's funny and you're like no i haven't had a brussels sprout a broccoli an asparagus spear like your entire 20s not my whole life my whole

childhood either your parents didn't hold your feet to the fire for veggies and shit? I mean, they don't eat vegetables either, really. Like southern food. There's not a lot of fresh steamed veggies in southern cuisine. There's a lot of fried vegetables. Yeah, okra and corn and mashed potatoes and stuff. There's not a lot of

any of those. No, never Brussels sprouts. Because I know my dad doesn't want them. So why would she make them? They can be pretty good. Why are restaurant Brussels sprouts so good? Are they just so good? Anytime something is good at a restaurant,

it's oil and butter. And sugar. Yeah, sugar. They put a lot of butter on. That does sound good. You can fix anything with oil. You know what? It was better when I didn't know. I was like, let's be healthy.

Let's get the Brussels sprouts. Yes. Or you go to a barbecue place and you're like, I'll have the green beans. I'll clean one corner of this giant meal up. And then it's like served in bacon fat. And you're like, these are the best green beans ever. I'm healthy. What do you think the ratio of potato to butter is supposed to be in mashed potatoes

oh not enough like it's 50 50 no that's not there's no way 50 yeah then that's a pound of butter yeah i mean that's oh that's i was gonna say that's not even that's not even keto is it because it's got potato in there. We're eating mashed potatoes with a pound of butter in them. We don't care about keto. You can't keto your way out of the whole word thing, boy. I was trying to think of the way sometimes people who are keto will eat terrible stuff. You're just hoping you get diarrhea

and maybe some of these calories don't count. If you eat enough, yeah, drink a a pint of olive oil and then you can eat whatever you want it just it's the opposite oh there's a youtuber that did that i can't remember who it is but but the challenge might have been to consume a lot of calories in a day or something but he he drank like a large amount of olive oil and it's like 36 000 calories a bottle or something yeah i imagine there's no way all that's getting absorbed your body's just in like panic survival mode i would imagine yeah because yeah i would be interested to know and i've never heard any science about this like our bodies turn food into fat what's the cap on the rate that it can do that what's the cap because like it let's say

that like it's got 16 hours to like with this donut i'm eating right now to like get all it's gonna get out of there yeah what if i eat 600 donuts you know i hear you kyle i think you're making a logical scientific argument for eating all your halloween candy in one night yeah for overeating and burst that i mean i've let myself i've led myself astray with that before uh taylor it's it's just a healthy habit yeah that's what a cheat meal is right like the idea is splurging and doing it all in one big burst and i when i see the rocky eight pounds of flapjacks i'm thinking like i don't think all that counts no it definitely

doesn't and he's fine like there's no way he's actually enjoying those cheat meals by the end of it because like how many pizzas could you eat all at once before you just give up and you're not even one one i could eat yeah i could eat a whole large pizza pretty easy no after that not that much. It's been a few years, but I have at times, like I'm traveling or something, and I'm like, all right, the only thing I can have delivered to this hotel room is a pizza,

so I'll do that. And man, you think like, all right, all rules off. I'm going to do this. I'm going to eat this pizza. But three slices in, it's like this isn't even a gain anymore. I don't want this. It's worse than nothing. The healthy pizza that i would order is papa john's uh extra thin crust with uh grilled chicken and it's so thin that it's like a big cracker it when you buy it it's like it crunches and

you're it's like very easy to bite through this piece with grilled chicken on it that's awful man grilled chicken grilled chicken in kyle we're not friends anymore i hate that about you we're talking about a when you're on the road and you're not you're trying not to ruin your fucking diet or whatever suck at cheating like just saying i felt so guilty eating that pizza but not even good guilt because it's grilled fucking chicken on pizza everybody at the pizza place is like making your pizza and like fucking fag i hardly ever eat pizza i bet it's been two years since i've had a slice and i was unaware of the advances in cheese crust like i i didn't know that like i didn't know food innovation was even a thing that there were scientists out there

looking to better the state of pizza by putting cheese in new places and god damn it they had a breakthrough they put pepperoni in there now in the crust now that's spinning in god's ways and look i can't believe nobody put a sausage in there look here's the deal. That crust has this circular cavity in it. Put a whole sausage link all the way through it, right? Just bratwurst. I'm in. That's a good idea. That is so Taylor. That is actually a good idea. You just put

some Italian sausage in there, mix it with the cheese, maybe some diced peps in there. Oh. Italian sausage. That's a good idea. An Italian sausage inside of that crust that'll be the biggest revolution in food technology since the chinese invented msg which changed the game oh you think if i got a hold of papa john you know disgraced former owner of the of the famed pizza chain like like we could start a new place

called no blacks allowed and we could integrate that. In case you don't know, he lost his job for saying the N-word in a board meeting. Yeah, but it was probably a good joke. It was probably funny. Well, you know. Lost him his pizza gig. You shouldn't be able to kick out John from Papa John's. I hate that.

I always said they should have had to change the name to something else if you kick john out if papa john isn't there like there he is all sweaty and shiny and looking weird on dateline and he's gone speaking of papa like last week kyle you mentioned you were like you know a game i'd play uh taylor is the ufc game the like the sport UFC game. And so I went on Xbox marketplace because I still have Game Pass, I guess I've been paying for and forgot about. So I've downloaded like seven games over the past two days and I'll play each one for like eight minutes and be like, this sucks. I'll find a new one. And so I downloaded UFC four. UFC five is the new one. one and so i downloaded ufc4 ufc5 is the new one ufc4 is the one that you can download for free on there and i i made my fighter pd prosciutto and i think that i think that's a pretty cool i made

him look like a really whoppy guy and i started trying to play and i'm really really bad like i set the difficulty to like intermediate, whatever the default is. And I got absolutely humiliated in my first fight. It wasn't even close. The guy took me to the ground. I didn't know how to respond to that. And so I'm button mashing. He's embarrassing me, elbowing me in the head.

My guy's covered in blood. And the stamina thing is blinking at me. Was he also using a custom character? Or was he someone? This was part of like the career mode. So like, I'm not even, this is a bot.

This is a bot. I was getting fucked up by a bot. Pretty bad. This is like, this is like Dana White. Like, welcome to the UFC. Come here.

I'll show you a thing or two. Yeah. Just drop it. Oh, it's so funny. Like the, the way the game starts is like you, you make your little character and I'm just dropping elbows on you. It's so funny. The way the game starts is you make your little character, and I'm like, Petey Prosciutto, he's 6'9".

Or no, he's 6'6". No way I'd make a character, by the way. Just interject. And that's the biggest, like, you can make a guy. Because I was like, I'm going to do a big lug. I know why you're struggling. Yeah, well, and then I made him a kickboxer. A 6'6", 290-pound kickboxer.

And the way the game starts is it just goes like, into the lion's den or like thrown to the sharks, something like that. It doesn't tell you what buttons to press or how to play. It just opens up to some amateur UFC fight, and it's like, now here comes Petey Prosciutto to take on Alan Feitzman. And then I go in there and like, I get brutalized in a way that like, if it happened in a real UFC fight,

they would, they would have stopped this. And I'm getting embarrassed by this guy. I don't land a single hit. I'm button mashing. I'm missing leg kicks. And then he's coming in and like, like popping me with two and hitting me in the liver.

And I don't, I didn't land one hit the entire time, get knocked out. And then like the little story mode begins. And like, I just got humiliated in a way like I, me, Taylor would have outperformed Petey Prosciutto in this fight. And then like the man, my manager comes to me and he's like, we were all at your fight. We're beyond impressed with your capabilities. We want you to

be part of our team and it's like i don't think you want me man like i'm not good enough for your squad and so then i then i did uh the intro where like it teaches you like 50 different combos on a heavy bag and then they threw me back to the wolves in another fight and i was like all right just remember a few moves as soon as the the fight started, I forgot everything I'd learned in training and I was button mashing. I got brutalized again and then I didn't even finish that fight. I got disheartened and quit. So I don't know if I'm going to join you in

the UFC game. The impression is everyone's a white belt when they're getting punched in the face. I certainly was. Yeah, I was panicking. I was trying, how do you turn around and run? Trying to back up. I've never played UFC. I played the new Mortal Kombat was trying to, how do you turn around and run? Like trying to back up. I've never played UFC. I played the new Mortal Kombat a while back.

Not the new, new one, but, you know, last year's or whatever. And, you know, I don't want to play against anybody who's ever played before, but it'd be really fun to play against you. There's no way I'd make a custom character, though. The cool part to me would be picking a fighter that I know and, you know, try to utilize their actual fighting style in some way you know you wouldn't want to make a custom guy do a career mode no I would want to pick a weight class like you pick the weight class and then I would pick my fighter from that weight class that I'd want

to like play as that'd be really fun to me I might I might jump into that more I'm about to potentially win the Stanley Cup with the Anaheim Ducks that's who I got drafted by I'm about to potentially win the Stanley Cup with the Anaheim Ducks. That's who I got drafted by. I'm not stoked about it, and I can't figure out the functionality to request a trade. Who's the best player in hockey that, like, Conor McGregor? What's his name? Conor McDavid. He sucks this year, I guess?

His team sucks. And I think he actually had a big game last night, scored a couple goals, got some more points. But he's so good that his season, I think last year he had 150 points in 82 games, which is absurd. He's hitting point totals that they haven't had since Lemieux. And so this year, they're like, ah, 12 games into the season, McDavid only has 18 points. What's wrong with this guy?

Is that what's happening? Oh, because I saw the YouTube videos about how terrible he was, and I took it to mean he was actually putting up below average numbers. For him, definitely below average, but he's also injured, and he has to keep playing because he's the best player in the world, and his team is bad right now. That Blackhawks rookie looks fine i'm so pissed about that it is so not fair that chicago got patrick kane and then now they have like a brief lull where they suck and now they get conor

bedard another generational this conor bedard dude i don't think he's aware how small he is and how scared he's supposed to be yeah he's what the fuck and he's gonna he's like't think he's aware how small he is and how scared he's supposed to be. Yeah. What the fuck? And he's going to – he's like 5'9". He's not even big. Oh, no. And he's already great. And so he's going to work out in the offseason with a bunch of NHL pros.

He's going to come back next year and be bigger and better. I think I could beat him at arm wrestling. He's 18 years old. He's 5'9", and he doesn't even – if you you saw him kyle you wouldn't know he was an athlete let alone professional athlete he's kind of chubby cheeked and he looks 14 even though he's actually 18 and he's playing in the nhl with these grown fucking men and so here's the deal if you have like a defender in front of you what your move probably to do is especially if you're a young speedy guy is to go

around the outside and try to like go faster than them and hook around behind them this guy skates right up the fucking middle like oh they're two defenders there well i'll just skate into both of them and do things that let me get past them somehow i watch it and i don't know what just happened but here he is getting a shot on goal. And he's doing it again and again and again as an 18-year-old 5'9", 160-pound twerp just doing what he can't do somehow. Yeah, he's going to be a great player. I'm sure he's a good guy, but it's so frustrating

to see Chicago get another fucking star like that. So I hope that similar to what's happening with Conor McDavid, who's the best player, who's like better than when you say generational talent, there's too many of those nowadays. Conor McDavid's actually a generational talent. He's the best guy since Crosby by a lot. Probably his peak's going to exceed Crosby's.

Sports right now is amazing for me. One, I guess the NBA is the sport I pay the most attention to outside of mma and uh there's just a bunch of rookies and young players right now who are exciting to watch i like the way that they play and i also like like the people like they're interesting characters in this soap opera that i follow so basketball is great and the generation of guys that are kind of older and aging out, I'm happy to age them out.

They all fucking suck. Cry babies, injury prone, dick shits. So NBA is also the best team on the planet right now. Philadelphia 76ers. Boom. It's not really up for debate.

We have the best record and the other team that was supposed to be the best. We just beat them. So what more do you want? We've got the best record and we beat the Celtics that was supposed to be the best, we just beat them. So what more do you want? We've got the best record and we beat the Celtics who were supposed to be the best. Let's get to the playoffs next month then, right? We'll just stop and hand out trophies.

No need for a good time. Stop the count. And then the other best record in the NFL, Philadelphia Eagles. We're like eight and one. There isn't another team with one loss. Philadelphia Bulldogs is what it is. It's so many of those players of Bulldogs.

It's really cool to see. Oh, like I don't know if I think it's your defensive line. I think you got like four or five Bulldogs on your defensive line. It's crazy. We have a play called the Tush Push that they want to outline. Basically, it's the quarterback sneak and it's legal. Any team can do it. Every team does do the quarterback sneak.

It's a standard play, but Philadelphia is so good at it, they're like, we need to change the rules. This isn't even fair. When it's like a short yard, yeah, Kelsey's the center, and he gets the credit for it. I'm not good enough at football to know if he deserves it, but it has a 92% success rate. If a play's over 50, they would just run it every time.

But when they need one or two yards, 92% of the time they do it. It's almost not fair to the running backs and the receivers because – Why don't they put them in that position? Put the back over and have him receive. Why even have your QB back there? The back can always pitch it off to the QB. I hear your thoughts. I'm not smart enough to answer it.

I'm a stats and stories football. Eagles. Eagles, listen to Kyle. After I fix that pizza with the sausage in it, I'm going to straighten those Philadelphia Eagles out. They got so many yards they're leaving on the field every week. You were there during the hangout

when Scum fucking came out and laid his dick down on the table and he's like woody the cowboys are better than your team woody we r plus minus is so great right now and he's got this excuse and that one he's just telling and then we played each other and philadelphia won it was a hard game but we we got to that. I want to like the NFL again, the Falcons. And I mean this when I say it. Never. You can lose so badly as an organization that I never want to be part of you again.

France did that in one war. They were winners throughout all of history, kicking ass up. They conquered England, right? All sorts of crazy wars. Napoleon, right? Yeah, they were pretty good at war. They bitched out once, and now nobody wants to be on their team. That's how I feel about the Falcons.

Look, you win two Super Bowls in a row, and we'll talk about it. Join the Chiefs. I'm not even kidding. I swear to God, I'm not kidding. You have lost two Super Bowls in a row to get you back. Also, I swear to God, the Braves could win two championships in a row, and I'll come back and talk to you. The Braves won two years ago.

Didn't they? They just won a World Series. Do you really want me to start on this? They've won two championships since 1991, and that was one of them. They've been to the playoffs more than 50% of the time of those years. They're there over half the time in the playoffs. Two out of since 91. How many years is that 35

yeah 34 years or something 34 years 32 yeah 34 years and they're in their playoffs greater than half the time they come away with two championships five of those years they i don't want to go into it again god damn it they're done i'm done with 30 teams you should win like every 30 years and they've won twice in 30 years yeah there. There aren't 30 teams in the playoffs. They're in the... Dude, do you want to join? They are the least-fledged team of all time. Everybody's jumping to the Chiefs bandwagon

because of Taylor Swift. And you're welcome over here on the Chiefs. See, that's why I said, look. I do like it. It's not Taylor Swift for me. It's her boyfriend. That dude is a podcast. Chiefs and Eagles play this week.

Or next week. Yeah, so that'll be big. The two best teams in the NFL. There's a game I actually care about. Maybe a Stats and Stories football fan or any fan, whatever. Dude, the Kelsey brothers have a kick-ass podcast, and YouTube has figured out that I like it, and they're always feeding me shorts.

I listened to the Eagles guy, Jason Kelsey, explain the pot. I don't know what happened. It might have been during COVID or something, but he did a marathon where he watched every movie in the twilight series. So he just went on this rant describing the plot of twilight. It took like six or seven minutes. His brother is going crazy. He's like,

you know, like, yeah. So, you know, then he's got the, the, the,

he's this age gap but no one really talks about it and his skin kind of flutters and then this giga this other person can see the future and he just laid it out and his brother's like ah new topic his brother takes his fucking thing off hangs it on the mic he never breaks character he just keeps going explaining all the details of twilight and i was there for. I was laughing out loud by the end of it. If you're a stats and stories gamer, you get to know players. Back in the 80s, you wouldn't recognize these guys. You never saw them with their helmet off.

I have a hard time liking the NFL at all. But I do like those brothers. I do like the story of them playing at each other. I liked Mahomes when I watched him play Brady and lose. Brady won that last Super Bowl for the Bucs against Mahomes. And I really started liking Mahomes that game. And then the next year, I think he won the Super Bowl. And obviously, it's hard not to dislike that.

But yeah, I've seen him a lot on YouTube Shorts and stuff. He seems like a really nice guy. Everybody seems to love Mahomes. I know I'm biased because I live in missouri but he's yeah of course that guy yeah but yeah i'm not i can't i can't bandwagon fucking eagles or or or i i was at a party um sunday it was like a big it was an nfl let's watch the nfl party that i got drugged to and it was all these grown men wearing their jerseys like yeah honey honey they intercepted it and ran it down to the 10 yard line and then they kicked the field goal won it and his and his like girl goes oh no way honey that's great and i can hear it like like like i'm not even looking up but i'm absorbing what just happened

and i'm like dude this is jason kelsey he's the center he might be a hall of famer which is hard to do as a center if you're a stats and stories that you know game day fit these guys show up in their suits they're looking like a million dollars these guys wear expensive clothing and he's mocking it i'm waiting for zach did he disappear this guy dressed up like the dude from 50 first dates for his game day fit. Fucking legend, right? Come on. You got to love him. That's a powerful man. Yeah, that's Samwise, by the way.

But you can see those shorts can barely contain those center football player thighs. You're right. He is obviously a powerful man. He's small for his position. He's always been kind of an underdog, and people thought that he would be a below-average player, and he's turned out to be a Hall of Famer. Does it help a little bit being a little shorter as a center or as a line

so you get a better angle of push? I don't know. Again, I don't know shit about football, but I do remember there was a trend towards bigger and bigger players, and everyone was breaking 300 pounds, 350 pounds. And this other team had like they weren't as heavy but they were strong and they were they're like you know what just being a fat piece of shit maybe isn't the best athlete on the field so i don't know maybe he doesn't get tired in the fourth quarter how much sauce is he you think he's on there? I'm thinking all of it.

I think he's got a whole bottle of Prego. I think a lot of NFL players are sauced up, a little saucy. I think UFC is about to be sauced up. They can talk a big game about their new testing, whatever. There's no way they're going to be as stringent and strict as Usada was, like showing up at those guys' houses at 4 a.m. and then show back up at 6 a.m like they just do doing no knock raids for piss they literally do piss and blood they know

not for piss and blood well you'll be on your yacht they'll come out on a speedboat to your yacht and be like hey ho wait is that a real piss and blood they did it to connor oh connor had the best tweet like connor is quoting from Wolf of Wall Street. There's a scene in Wolf of Wall Street where the feds come onto his yacht, and he's just talking down to them. He's just being off. He's pulling out. Look at this.

Fucking year's salary. Fucking throwing away $80,000. Look at that. Year's fucking salary. They could give a fuck, you piece. And Connor's quoting, not that part, but a couple of the other more well-written lines from it. It's pretty funny.

He's got a memorized, uh, you know, um, but he knew that situation. They went out to his yacht, tested him on his boat, you know,

out in the Adriatic or some shit. He's like, you stay in your fucking boat down there. I'll piss on you. Hold the cup. You're fucking poor. Connor's coach says that Connor likes MMA again and he's enjoying training we'll see I'm not convinced Kavanaugh said that

yes speaking of sports did you like I saw Michigan like they had their shit where their coach got suspended for a game and so they couldn't three games yeah three games or whatever it is. And Michigan won against Penn State by a – actually, not by a – it was a pretty close game.

And then after the game, they interviewed the stand-in assistant coach. Black guy, right? From Michigan, this black guy. And this guy is, like, openly weeping. He's like, this is for you, Coach Harbaugh. This is for you. And everybody knows you were doing much right and it's for you and like like as if he had died like all this jim harbaugh is sitting in a booth eating watching the game and this guy like was having probably called the fucking game i'm sure probably called the game by simulcast and like any you know like we have the technology now he doesn't need to be

there on site he could fucking coach that game from hawaii yeah yeah you're right but like the whole thing they were stealing they were stealing and recording signs again it's another one of those things where like there's lots of bending of rules but here that here's the team that got caught breaking it like red-handed and the coach should bear the brunt of it. The problem is suspending him for three games is horseshit for all, for all the reasons we just said, he can coach the game from the goddamn moon. It's not a,

it's not a problem. He just can't be there to have his fun and be on TV, which is, he probably prefers it this way. So what if you're number five, who's number five? Is it Florida's like four? Oregon.

Oregon might be fifth or sixth. Like whoever's five, if you're looking, if you're the outside looking in for the playoffs, what more shit that the cheaters get to get to play? Or what if you're, let's see, it's, what if you're Florida state and you should be in, or not Florida state, what if you're Ohio state and you should have that number two seed over Michigan who's cheating.

So instead of playing Florida State, you have to play Georgia the first fucking round. That's bullshit, too. There's no real punishment for what they've done here. Georgia, like first year following college football closely at all. And like I get like this playoff structure is hilarious like it's so disjointed it's so absurd it's just like voting the bcs days they should just be like the top eight teams not the top four or whatever the fuck it is it's absurd this is so much better than it once was they the bcs rankings would they basically, they had a program and they'd punch all the relevant data in

and it would tell you who the best teams were. And then you got these awful matchups at the end. There was no playoffs. It was like, all right, you're number one, you're number two. Y'all play for the championship. And you'd be like, what the fuck are you doing? There's this unbeaten team at number three. And Georgia would often be just on the outside looking in during those years,

you know, like number three, number four, number four number five number six always top 10 but we never got to fight to prove that we're just as good as like some i don't know some big team in the midwest a michigan and ohio state a usc back in the day they were super good and and like kyle said sometimes that team that the computer said was third but everyone agreed was second, would win their game. And they'd pretend they were national champs too. Blow out their game. Yeah, and they'd be like, we're the other national champs.

And there'd be a little confusion as to who was national champ. And that happened with USC one year. I think they were trying to three-peat. And they're like, the surest bet in all of sports to have ever existed is that USC

won't three Pete because they weren't champions two years ago. They claim it, but they weren't. That is pretty cheaty of them. But like, yeah, I watched some of the Penn state, Michigan state game.

And like, I'm no football expert, but it is hilarious to pretend that either of those teams wouldn't get humiliated by Georgia. Georgia would humiliate both of those teams. Georgia is so much better than Michigan and Penn State. And I had to recheck who Michigan plays three times, being like, but they've played people. No, I guess Penn state was their first like real ranked opponent.

Okay. Then you check like Penn state's record and it's like, oh, okay. They edged one out against bump up university. Like it's, I mean, we've got to play Alabama,

you know, like, like we've still got to play Alabama. That's another sec team. Like Alabama is going to get, who would you be more afraid? And who do you think the Georgia player and coaches are more afraid of? Alabama ranked eight or Michigan ranked one?

Obviously, everyone in the, is this like, I'm a noob to college football, but is it kind of like an understood silly thing where everyone in the country knows Alabama would beat Michigan? Or is there like people pretending? This is why it's so much better to have even our four team playoffs because back in the day when it was just 1v2, you're like, oh my god four is better than any of them.

You know, like now I'm with Taylor. They can't play all those extra games. It's one extra game takes you from four to eight. That would mean a lot to me. That'd be good. Then Mizzou might get a chance. If we won out, we could sneak into that top eight. We're rank 11 now.

Mizzou's very good. You're just like, wow. Mizzou has given Georgia their hardest look this whole year. It was kind of close with South Carolina early on, but Mizzou has definitely been seemingly the best team we've played this year. It was great that they had that statement game over the weekend and just fucking trounced Ole Miss. It was 14-14, and then the Bulldogs just kept scoring and didn't stop.

They scored their first three or four possessions or something in a row. It was real funny. I ended up turning that off in the end of the third quarter because I'm like, well, this is over. Ole Miss isn't going to come back. Yeah, and in the third quarter, I was like, well, this is over. Ole Miss isn't going to come back. And then Mizzou embarrassed Tennessee. Tennessee was the impressive win from it. So Mizzou played well against Georgia but lost. And it's like, you know, it's hard to tell how good a team is in a loss because Georgia might not have been full throttle

because they're winning. And you beat another ranked team. I can't recall who it was, but it wasn't as big a name. Tennessee's kind of their historically huge name and they're good this year. And Mizzou beat them. And I'm like, well, shit, that's for real. Boom. Yeah. Now they just need to beat Florida and Arkansas, which

should be very easy compared to Tennessee and very, very easy compared to having to play Georgia. Alabama had lost the other day, you guys would be leading the West, I think, on your way to rematch Georgia. That's the best storyline. That would be fun.

Is if Alabama had lost their game and then we rematch and you beat the Bulldogs and then slide into the national title playoff. That would be the hero season. Yeah, and then after you beat a team like Georgiaorgia or alabama playing michigan or penn state or ohio state is not gonna feel scary that's how it was last year when we once we get get past alabama it's like who's next didn't was it michigan didn't we beat nick savin didn't like what was didn't they play michigan in the finals last year in the championship and they beat them like 60-2?

Like something absurd? I think that's what happened. It's hard to remember. I remember it was a happy time. I remember the hot wings. I remember it was a happy time. No, it was the TCU Horned Frogs. Oh, that's right.

Oh, yeah. 65-7. That's that SEC versus. Oh, yeah. 65-7. That's that SEC versus other conferences, boy. 65-7 in the National... And now I get why the SEC people are so annoying, because it's

incontrovertibly true that all the teams in the SEC are just higher quality. They're just better. You took it too far. You said all the teams. There's definitely teams outside. Okay, on average, the SEC tends to be the best conference. You might argue there have been years where they weren't best. Clemson had that.

Clemson and then USC had their little dynasties. I want to say Texas had a little thing going on. Nebraska, if you go back far enough. Now Texas and Oklahoma are coming over to the SEC, which kind of – As they should be. I like that. They're getting real fast and loose with Southeast. SEC should be Confederate states only, right?

I think it's Confederate states only. That's how we stuck in. The Trader Conference. That'd be good. The dominate everybody else conference. Wait, what are Texas and Oklahoma in? Big 12, right? The Trader Conference. That'd be good. The Dominate Everybody Else Conference. Wait, what are Texas and Oklahoma in? Big 12? Right? I thought Texas came over to the SEC.

No, I'm saying they were in Big 12, and next year they're going to be SEC. So, like, what's happening to the Big 12? Like, they're just not going to be a Power 5 conference without those two? I mean, they still will be, but it's... I don't know. How many teams are there? Is the SEC getting rid of

anyone, or are they just hoovering up all the good teams? I think they're just hoovering up the good teams, which is not fair to some teams in the SEC who are finally getting good. You need to slide up north or something and

get in there next to Michigan. That's like... Yeah. You can just play Michigan earlier. Up in that conference. In that Notre Dame made-up league that they have. Your poor team has to travel to Michigan and Ohio all the time. Actually, that's not that far from Missouri.

No, it wouldn't be. Not any further than Florida. I somehow put your team outside Atlanta because it's SEC. That's where you think those teams should be from. Okay, Alabama, Georgia, Florida. Okay, Missouri, you're getting a little weird. North Carolina has a better claim to the

Southeast Conference than Missouri. That's true. We were a slave state because that's when they had that whole thing where they were like, hey, if we add a new state, we gotta go tit for tat. Missouri? Wait, who has the placard?

Okay, slaves. Okay, what's the next one? Indiana? Okay, free. What a funny way that they did that back then. That's why Oklahoma has the panhandle so that Texas could be... I guess if you were over a certain parallel, you couldn't be a slave state anymore. So Texas just gave away that part north of them to Oklahoma, and that's why it has that thing.

What good is it? You can't even own a feather up there. I didn't know that's why Oklahoma looked so weird. Yeah. So that Texas could be a slave state. How wide is that little panhandle someone living there in oklahoma is it like i rode my motorcycle through it it's fucking wide it goes on for so long and there's like nothing there for the longest way if you get to the very tip of it

it starts to get like rolling hills but it is so that when i talk about how i went like 100 miles and the tallest thing was me that's like where that is only 367 miles north and south jesus that's so wide though 34 miles wide wait north and south 34 miles 166 well i was on dirt roads it felt longer no that's huge i i saw um i saw a tiktok with the lady who books disney vacations and and um she was talking about how europeans will call and have no scope or idea of the scope or the size of the united states that someone called and they're like yeah we want four days and nights at disney and we want a rental car and like oh okay and you know they're like what are you going to do on your trip like oh we like, oh, one day we're going to go see the Grand Canyon.

Probably the next day head up and see that. We really want to see the Statue of Liberty. It's going to pop in there. And then the rides. Oh, and Yosemite and you're good. Yeah, and they're like, ha, ha, ha. Then she laughs and she's like, well, I could book you some flights. She's like, ma'am, you're talking about 1,800 miles.

You might be able to drive around florida you know the state of florida in three or four days you know you can do that um and they they're like thought they were being joked like like made fun of so they hang up and do some googling i guess and have to call back and apologize and be like yeah i think they flew up to the i think they wanted to like fly up and see the uh the statue of liberty and like do it that way but they had no idea that they said that they thought yeah it looked so big on maps because america made the maps what a retard like that's literally like flying into paris and being like next tomorrow afternoon you want to stop by moscow that's that's europe you know we're still europe right what is it the mercator projection

you guys should probably know all yeah yeah we're like like greenland looks bigger because in order for the map to look like good closer to the poles you get yeah they distort the the ones closer to the poles to look bigger and and that africa is bigger than it looks it's enormous yeah it's it looks like it's america size, but it's bigger. Yeah, and Australia is way bigger, I think. No, Australia's smaller. I think smaller. Yeah. Is it? Because it's nearer the pole.

That's why a lot of Central American countries are bigger than you think, because they're right at the line. They're still not big, but they get screwed over. I'm sure you're right. I didn't really think about them. They get overlooked. They're the flyover states of the North of South America. Of the Americas.

Where the hell is Guatemala? Who cares? White Bull of Mexico. If we ever have a trivia question, name all the states based on a map. I'm going to dominate you guys because of the Midwest. You really are. I would hate And I know the Northeast, so no Northeasterners are going to dominate you guys because of the Midwest. You really are. I would hate... And I know the Northeast, so no Northeasterners are

going to get me there. You're probably better, but I'm not going down without a fight. I've ridden through most of these places. I know Woody would give me a fight on it, and I think Kyle gets out to Dakota land and loses his bearings. I don't know.

No, no, no. We don't have time now, but I think I got a pretty good scope on the Western part. It's the Northeastern part where things get into a jumble and it's like, all right, Maryland's like in Delaware and it's, it's all fucking crammed in there. Like from there, I'm like one of these is Iowa.

It's not as west as you think. I know the shape. I know Wisconsin's shape. It's got a very distinct, almost like a tomato or something. It's got this little, I know the shapes of the state. So I think if I've got the map, I can get there. You're not even thinking of Wisconsin. It doesn't look like a tomato at all.

It looks like a tomato to me. Okay, fair enough. We should probably wrap Kyle's show after this. It looks like a tomato to me. Okay, fair enough. We should probably wrap. Kyle's going to show after this. All right, PKN482. Sorry I was late.