Painkiller Already - PKN #80
Episode Date: March 4, 2016This week on PKN... Just listen, I'm not spoiling anything here......
Transcript
Discussion (0)
And we're live. Oh, uh, shucks. Can you live without my video?
Yeah. If I turn it on, it'll shift everybody, and then I'll have to fix the recordings and stuff. I can.
No, I'll just have to infer what faces you're making, and emotions are...
I'll just stare at Taylor the whole time. I like doing it. I'm doing it. I think I can figure it out.
Yeah, me and Kyle have... we'll just have our chemistry.
I'm making eye con... I don't know where you're looking, but I'm making eye contact with you right now.
I fixed it.
I'm making eye contact with you too,
but it looks like you're looking over my right shoulder
like someone who has a slight eye problem.
Not me, man.
You're looking right into my fucking soul right now.
It's like we're one.
Does that make you uncomfortable?
Almost even worse than a really bad, bad lazy eye,
like a Forrest Whitaker lazy eye,
is one that's
just like three degrees off, you know, because then you're not sure which one to look at.
I had a science teacher like that in seventh grade, Mr. Bradsen or something like that,
and he had this horrible lazy eye, and I remember one time me and my buddy were making these
paper airplanes to throw as he was turning around with the fucking Bunsen burners or
whatever, and my friend threw one, and it hit him in the back,
just cliche middle school thing.
And he turns around, and he started yelling
at our, like, little two-tabled group
and was like, I can't believe, why would you throw that?
That's disrespectful.
We've had this conversation before.
And I kind of, like, looked over and laughed at my friend
because I thought he was getting yelled at.
And he's like, oh, and what do you find so funny about all this?
Oh, you're looking at me
All right simple misunderstanding, you know you're wrong
Yeah, we were we were talking about Deadpool just before just where we kick this thing off
I think we've all seen it now. I saw it, I think, yesterday afternoon.
I saw it shitty.
I saw it.
Somebody, it's on BitTorrent somewhere.
And I know, right?
The thing is, the movie's been out for like two weeks almost,
a week and a half, ten days.
And I hadn't seen it, and I was was like I'm not getting out to see it like
here it is I can see it and then know what it's about and enjoy the movie and
by the way loved it thought it was awesome I Taylor I think you said
Deadpool was just okay in your head right yeah but not I thought it was
great I and I think I'm just really like dirty stuff quite a bit, right?
There was a montage.
Very raunchy.
There was a montage of them having sex in it.
And I don't want to spoil it.
So I'm going to go spoiler free on this thing.
Okay.
No specifics.
Yeah, no specifics.
But I'll say this.
There's a montage of sex in the film.
And that sex helps you establish how much they mean to each other
and how they're you know two peas in a pod and um i uh i feel like sex scenes do that better than
any other dude i don't want to see you fucking holding hands walking around the lake like that
doesn't that tells me you like each other on a fifth grade level you know the the shit that
happened in there tells me that you two are deeply suited for each other like each other it's uh i could go on
and on dude the movie 300 right so who's the main character unitas or something leonidas leonidas
thank you um he has sex with his wife at the start to show like to demonstrate how connected they are johnny unite is king of the spartans so anyway uh leonidas but he doesn't just have sex with her like a normal loving way
he fucking taps that from behind and at least for me perhaps i'm giving something away here
i was like oh yeah they're extra good like i i like that i like that he's tapping that from behind
i like all the crazy shit that Deadpool was doing.
Because, I don't know, it just established something.
I feel like it being R-rated.
Like, there's a scene, and this is in the trailer, totally not a giveaway.
He cuts someone's head off with a sword and then kicks it into somebody else.
That doesn't happen in PG movies.
That's not in the Avengers.
In the Avengers, they just punch giant CGI monsters in the movies. That's not in the Avengers. In the Avengers, they just punch giant CGI
monsters in the chest, but in Deadpool,
they slice the guy's head off and kick it
at somebody else. Yeah, there's a little bit more...
It's not much of a change.
It's less than you might think. So you look
at something like Lord of the Rings, that easily could have
been an R-rated film if the
blood were red instead of black, but it's
not. Compare Braveheart with
Lord of the Rings. Braveheart,
you probably think, oh man, that was gory, right?
That big battle scene where everybody's hacking everybody
up? Every Lord of the Rings
movie was that for at least an hour.
It's only the black work blood that makes it
not look as bad. Exactly. So it's
that little change, but that little
change means a lot. Now, I watched
Robocop the other night, and they use blood
squibs, or blood packs, you know, so when someone gets shot, their clothing literally explodes outward,
and blood gushes out, and in the scene very early in Robocop 1, where they shoot the main character,
and that's how he becomes Robocop, it's incredibly violent and brutal. They literally take one of his
arms off with a 12-gauge point blank.
But he's just screaming as bullet after bullet hits him, and that is R-rated.
There's a big difference between even the hard PG-13, like the Dark Knight,
where we see him literally torturing people, beating people, breaking bones,
but we don't see gore.
And that little bit extra is...
I don't completely agree.
Because here's my thought.
I think you're right in that Lord of the Rings
was just a hiccup away from being R, right?
Whatever it was, PG-13, I guess.
I don't know which one's higher.
So all they needed...
They went right up to the edge of it.
But I wouldn't say that Deadpool was right at the bottom edge.
You wrote me and said,
I don't think any of the other super movies have a pussy in them.
Right?
Do you remember that?
Yeah.
It was definitely in some way.
He was at the top edge of R.
Right?
I don't know about that.
No.
The fight scenes were maybe only a step further.
But the rest of the sex scenes were outrageous.
And there was a lot of cursing.
Right?
PG-13 gives you one or two cursing.
There must have been. It's the fucks. It's thes you get you get one fuck in a pg-13 film and there's lots of fucks
okay so the language was definitely super raunchy over the top um the sex i thought was just plain
r like it wasn't much more you know i've seen the stuff that borders on nc-17 or goes to nc-17 and
and it wasn't that. It wasn't pornographic
by any nature.
We just saw a lot of titties.
It didn't stand out
from other similar scenes
in R-rated movies.
I mean,
it definitely required the R
because there's lots of titties.
And I saw a woman's vagina
very clearly
and it was nice.
I didn't see that.
What was that?
In the strip club,
the stripper is rotating.
Is that where it was?
And you just...
Pussy shot.
I watched this shit in
imax okay that pussy was the size of a buick i saw she had a saber and it wasn't that it wasn't
that uh the it wasn't the super hairy 70s pussy where they they put that like uh i'm blanking out
on the word uh but there's a i think it's a it's a vagina toupee, basically. Merkin. Yeah, same time.
Merkin.
There was no Merkin.
She had a shaved pussy with a landing strip, and you saw her lips.
I was like, that's pussy.
I'd know that anywhere.
I like that.
Yeah, I've seen that before.
That's good stuff.
Was it a medium R-rated vagina shot where it was just kind of one of the interior ones were just the lips?
Or was it kind of just mayhem down there with things hanging?
Now, I don't know if you're familiar with this subreddit, but it's the SIMP, the simp subreddit.
And these are vaginas.
No, Kyle, I know nothing about the simp subreddit.
I'm just taking a guess here.
Is it based on looking like Homer Simpson's lips turned sideways?
Yes, yes yes it is.
Fuck you, man.
It's an extreme any vagina with large lips.
It's kind of what we all want, I think, for the most part.
I think most people, like as a kid, that was the vagina.
That's what I pictured a pussy looking like as like an 8-year-old who had never really gotten a good look at one or two.
You don't want the Arby's 5 under 5?
No. No, that's the worst. That's the worst um that that's awful I can't have that
uh quite frankly um I've I've anyway get it getting away from the Arby's pussy um I like
Deadpool a lot I liked um Taylor you said that and I think I might agree with you Deadpool is um it's it's a romantic movie pretending to be a superhero
movie pretending to be a romantic movie yes that makes sense masquerading around with an action
face but in real life it's just an hour and a half long story of him pining over his girlfriend
but it's blended in so well that I didn't mind a bit. I liked it.
I enjoyed the love story aspect of it.
And it certainly didn't feel forced.
It felt like you needed it.
It felt like what else is going to keep this man going, right,
after all this stuff?
There has to be something to drive him forward to motivate him.
That makes sense, but I almost feel like the nature of his character is
everything he's doing is, you know, I'm looking out for number one.
I'm the best.
Just about me.
You know, everything he does.
And then just for one person, he just sets everything aside.
I don't think it's hard to find another motivation, though.
He could have easily said, oh, you ruined my face.
Now I'm going to track you down and fix me. For just personally wanting to look better
instead of wanting to look better for his partner.
Like, I don't think it's hard to...
I could have rewritten that in 15 minutes.
I liked it better the way it was.
I do too.
I felt like the relationship he had with her
and the sex montage.
I don't know if I've mentioned it,
but I was a big fan.
Yeah.
Yeah, okay.
I felt like that made the whole movie better.
Might have been my favorite part of the movie, the sex montage.
When he and she are being introduced in the bar with that guy from Silicon Valley,
who was the best character in that whole movie?
He was the funniest by far.
Very good.
When the woman and Ryan Reynolds were getting to know each other at that bar,
and it was just like three straight minutes of not realistic conversation this is
not the way people meet or talk to each other it's just oh how about i set you up for a one-liner oh
i bet you'd like that wouldn't you big boy oh i bet you're the one who can handle a big boy aren't
you you fucking whore and it's just like oh my god this isn't how people talk this is not it was
like it was like dirty gilmore it was like dirty gilmore girls. I liked it. I liked it too.
It was like really fast.
What happened is they met. I don't like a movie that makes me realize I'm watching a movie.
It was like, okay, I feel you, Taylor.
I hear what you're saying.
But the scene, he says like, oh, I had a rough childhood.
And then she says, well, mine was rougher.
His was rougher, et cetera, et cetera.
And it just keeps topping.
And it's not realistic.
And you're meant to know, even naive people like me, that this isn't true.
And, you know, like, oh, my father beat me.
Oh, you had a father, huh?
I was molested.
My uncle molested me.
He's like, uncle?
It was uncles for me.
Or there's one who's like lived in a crack house with 14 other kids in one room.
He's like, you had a house.
Stuff like that. It's great. All He's like, you had a house. Stuff like that.
It's great.
All right, so it was fully a good touch.
But anyway, again, that goes to establish
how these two are uniquely perfect for each other.
And Taylor's right.
No one really talks like that.
Except these two, because they're so great together.
And because I feel like this movie
wasn't trying to be a comic book movie.
It was trying to be a movie comic
book almost. I feel
like they were giving the viewer
the experience of reading a Deadpool comic
and what that's like. Not that
I've ever done such a thing, but just reading
what the fans have said
on the subreddits and such.
I really liked
the combat. I liked his
combat style. I like that it's kind of devil may care
with lots of comedy
he's a little bit like Jim Carrey in The Mask
in some regards where he knows the whole time
that this is all for shits and giggles
and he's putting on a show while he works
he's aware that there's an audience watching him
that's one of the aspects of Deadpool
so I didn't read the comics either
Deadpool's more indestructible than I knew.
I knew that he could
take good damage and come back for me.
He's just Wolverine, basically, right?
I watched a YouTube video, a really good one,
about scenes that were cut from the movie.
And one of them is a montage,
almost Groundhog Day-like,
where he tries to kill himself.
He's driving cars off cliffs.
He's doing all these crazy things he
got cut for budget reasons yeah that would have been the best scene of the whole movie it would
i i all the scenes that got cut i would have really enjoyed um another one hey here's the thing
so i think i can say this without ruining anything there's a big fight at the end
every marvel movie um it was meant to have a lot more gunplay. And the whole thing about him forgetting the guns was for budget reasons.
They just cut out like a giant.
So lame.
Yeah, piece of the movie.
Well, he refers to the budget of the movie at one point.
I liked that a lot too.
He was like, you ever notice that blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
That's probably because we couldn't afford it.
Yeah.
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
I was going to correct you, but you're obviously doing that so not to spoil it my yeah well done yeah
yeah the way they though i'll just in reference to that but i won't spoil anything the shoehorning
of those other two characters into it who were like ostensibly related to the x-men or whatever
ah there's a reason for that, apparently. It was so forced
and, I don't know,
especially the main bad guy's
assistant lady.
It was just, it was like,
she was so boring, no
character at all. I liked her.
She just grimaced, and then
I know that, like, I don't know,
like, with superheroes, like, play to your strengths.
Like, when I see, it's more believable when I see, like, I don't know, like, with superheroes, like, play to your strengths. Like, when I see, it's more believable when I see, like, a giant metal man with huge hulking arms just beating the shit out of someone.
It's like, okay, that's a believable power for him because he's made of titanium or something.
But when you see some lady who looks like she could have been serving you your shitty lunch at middle school six hours prior to her gig at the super secret lab.
It's like, oh, you're the super strength person.
Like, oh, wait, good casting, you jackasses.
Like, I don't know.
You know what I wanted?
One of the things, like, when it happened,
I was like, oh, why didn't they do that?
Why didn't we get to see that lady's titty?
I won't go any further with the scene,
but I would have liked to have seen that lady's titty.
Yeah, that clearly should have happened.
I should have seen that.
That proves every movie.
Yeah, and then that would have been great there were a handful of things some missing scenes some uh you know like the things they even talked about that would have made the movie much better
and i'm excited about the next one yes yeah and they're not going to have the same budget
challenges next deadpool oh so they made this one for $50 million.
I'm sure we probably all read the same Reddit thing that said he got $2 million up front plus some bonuses for box office.
So they estimate he might make $10 million off this thing,
which is pretty low in the whole Robert Downey Jr. scheme of things
when you're the lead guy on a movie that can make half a billion dollars.
And Deadpool has already surpassed that. scheme of things when you're the lead guy on a movie that can make half a billion dollars and Deadpool
has already surpassed that.
I think it's sixth highest grossing
R-rated movie of all time already
in its second week or something like that.
We'll see how it
finishes up but it's made a shit ton of movie
of money and
they've already greenlit the sequel.
We already know that he's going to have his...
I don't know if you guys sat after the credits rolled to see the...
Yeah, I did.
They did?
Yeah.
Very disappointing.
Yeah, it was.
She's loved it so much.
I don't see what he was so excited about.
Well, they explained that the sequel would have another character in it
that's much beloved by the Deadpool fan base, I think.
And going back to that, I think that
that X-Man character,
the Russian guy who's all metal.
Colossus. I think that he's a
regular in the Deadpool universe.
I think maybe he's an X-Man that
regularly interacts with Deadpool
and maybe that's why he was there.
Or it may have been exactly what Deadpool
said in the movie.
I wouldn't know.
I'm definitely not an expert on Deadpool.
I always wondered what the big deal was with him because he's so, like every Comic-Con
and something, the guy who's dressed up as Deadpool is like the star of the show.
And I was always like, what's the big deal with Deadpool?
Now that I've seen the movie, I'm excited about Deadpool too.
Yeah.
I'm not going to be fooled into going to another rom-com
so i will wait until it's free online
not me two bucks for that i i really like the imax experience i i um i got there you know you
get to reserve your seat so i'm sitting i did a little research and i figured i found the the
exact two seats that they mix the audio for in the stadiums
Jesus Christ
I mean look
That's such a good idea I'm not even making fun of you
If you're paying $42 to go see a movie
it's good to know what the
best two seats in the house are
so it's like two thirds of the way up the
dead center and that's where the guy
sits who actually mixes the audio
and I had a great experience I really loved it dead center and that's where the guy sits who actually mixes the audio. And I
had a great experience. I really loved it.
What do we have here?
Well, it's interesting to me that you guys liked Deadpool
so much.
I think it might be...
It's my girlfriend's favorite Marvel movie.
I think it's probably
in my top three. I really liked Iron Man
one. It's my favorite.
Avengers one is my second favorite.
The rest of them are pretty iffy.
The last Captain America was...
Is Guardians of the Galaxy Marvel?
Yeah, that's my number one.
You're number one, huh?
It's my number three, I think.
I'm not big into superhero movies, so my judgments
are totally off.
You've heard my weird ramblings
about Captain America. I don't know what it is about him.
I just really hate him.
You know what? Your ramblings are so funny.
You're going to leadership me to death?
Yeah.
Let me ask you this though. If there were a scene
in one of these Avengers or Captain
America movies where Captain America took
legit machine gun fire
and then showed off
some attribute that allowed him to tough out
that sort of thing, would you like him more
then if you realized that, oh, this guy can
take some fucking shit. He's pretty hardcore.
Like if he was taking
shots to the head and it's like he's
healing and stuff? Not necessarily the head,
but let's say that Captain America took
a machine gun spray, like an
MP5 spray to the gut. He took
three in the stomach,
and he was just like filled it up with silicone or something
and just kept fighting.
Like if you saw him do something that badass,
would that inspire you to like him more?
Because I feel like it would for me because I kind of feel the same way.
No, what I would see is in the background,
I would see the Hulk leaping by him with the tank
and each hand held by the turret swinging, causing max mayhem. And I would say to Captain Americaing by him with the tank in each hand held by the turret,
swinging, causing max mayhem.
And I would say to Captain America, look to your left.
That's what a superhero is.
A pathetic little fruitcake.
Look at that.
Oh, do you see that 18-foot-tall giant green man tearing the tops off of tanks
and throwing it at him?
Somehow he put his hand into it.
Do you see how three 9mm bullets just crippled you?
Yeah, I know.
Dude, I'm different.
There's a scene in the first Avengers where he's like,
Hawkeye, we need you up here.
You spot.
You do this.
Robert Downey, we need you to go around and take on one of those big guys.
And Hulk, smash.
And I'm like, oh, he just coordinated all that.
They're all following his game plan.
He's there in the walkie making sure everyone is at maximum effectiveness i was like yeah he's kind
of living up to the leadership hype i dig this oh yeah let's just listen to this guy guy who
still is kind of coming to terms with everybody sharing the same water fountain and he's leading
the team
you gotta really lay off of
the black members of the
superhero party. You can't be calling them that.
I always felt like it would've been funny
if Captain America had a private moment
where Robert Downey Jr. was like,
so who put the nigger in charge?
And then Robert Downey Jr. would be like,
and then Captain America's like,
I'm just fucking with you.
And then he jumps out of the plane or something.
That's when an R-rated Avengers would be like I wanted to see him work out of racism
like when he first came onto the ship
and he's like sitting there and sees Robert Downey Jr.
having a coffee or something
and he would just be like boy boy
and just yell at him like that
demand him to come over oh that'd be great
wait is Robert Downey Jr. something?
why would he call him boy?
because that's a condescending thing to call black people.
Robert Downey Jr.'s not black.
No, I was saying if he saw Robert Downey Jr. enjoying something,
he would command.
Oh, to get someone to deliver his too.
I see, yeah.
Yes, boy, bring me a cup as well.
Because he doesn't understand.
They shouldn't be leading.
Half the skyscrapers in New York where they're fighting weren't there last time he saw it.
He doesn't even know coordinates.
He doesn't even know how fast cars can go.
He has no knowledge of anything tactical.
It'd be like if Attila the Hun came into World War II and he's like,
bring up the cavalry on this side.
And they're like, no, we've got to really catch you up to warfare because you're way the fuck behind.
Just because you were Johnny All-Star in the year 18 doesn't mean you know shit just because you were king
leon king unitis back in the day with your horse yeah king unitis uh quarterback of the tundra
so i don't know uh no i i'd like the first marvel movie a ton um avengers that is yeah i'm sorry i
like the first avengers a ton i like the deadpool a lot i haven't been in love with the captain
america's i don't know why i haven't either um i don't care about galaxy i enjoyed but i really
just liked chris pratt and won good things for him for some reason
but it wasn't like
I came away from that movie just
thinking it was a cinematic
masterpiece
it was light hearted and funny in a way
that the others weren't
I like the music
the soundtrack would be epic for it
because it's all those oldies hits
I like that stuff a lot
I think those are some of the things I like the most about it. And it was really open-ended. I feel like
with like a movie, I don't know, the Spider-Man movies, they kind of give you his whole, every
time they reboot that thing, they give you the whole Genesis and you learn about his
grandma and his grandpa and Mary Jane and all that bullshit all over again but i felt like with um with with um guardians of the galaxy they left
a lot of stuff open i felt like we still don't know very much about him he still hasn't discovered
who his father is and that's a major plot line in the greater marvel universe and there's just a lot
left to do there i did that could ryan reynolds worked on deadpool for 10 years. I keep seeing this again and again. I assume it's true.
I wonder what was so hard about it.
10 years?
I think he was uncompromising
about what kind of
movie he wanted to make. That he wanted this movie.
And that they had
a hard time getting the funding.
If what I've read
is correct, the original
reason why he was so interested in Deadpool
is because in the Deadpool comic at one point,
they reference Ryan Reynolds.
He's mentioned in the comic.
And so that got him interested in the comic.
He falls in love with it and he wants to be Deadpool.
He's like, that's me.
I could be that guy.
So I know that he...
I've read two versions of it.
There was that leaked footage,
which was really just kind of a promo
to get fan support going,
of him doing the bridge scene
where he jumps off and attacks the motorcade.
And I've heard that that costs anywhere
from a quarter million to five million dollars.
I believe the quarter million number
more than any of the others I've read.
I've read that Ryan paid for that,
but I've also read that the studio ended up paying
for that. I don't know who to believe. I read a different thing.
I read that they gave him
$3 million or
$5 million to make the movie,
and instead he just made that scene
and spent all
the money on it, and we're like,
look how great this can be.
Now you need to fund the rest of the movie.
And they did.
Isn't that just stealing?
Like they're giving you money to do something?
I made you a trailer!
Yeah, and then they make you a trailer instead
and they get so inspired by it
that now it's a $50 million movie.
I might be mixing it up with another movie.
Yeah, I don't think that's true.
I think you're wrong about that one.
I'm afraid I mixed up my movies.
I'm not sure.
Yeah, yeah.
But what you said sounds like something that could happen, though.
That sounds really fun.
But yeah, I liked it a lot.
I felt like it went places that certainly none of the other Marvel movies would go.
Lots of really crass jokes.
I enjoyed that.
I liked the dirty humor of it.
I liked all the gunplay, of
course. That's a big aspect
of his character. The
superheroes that I like
aren't nice people.
That's why I was always so excited about Wolverine, but
he hasn't really been himself.
The Wolverine...
He's been too trim
around the edges. Even the 90's
cartoon Wolverine is a pretty nasty guy to deal with.
Yeah.
I don't picture him with a...
Who's the guy who plays him now?
What's his name?
Hugh Jackman, right?
Hugh Jackman.
I read, and I'm not Mr. Comic Book Knowledge,
but apparently Wolverine, the character, is like 5'2",
or something like a scrappy little dude.
Really wide, though.
Yeah, really like a Gimli build to him.
Exactly.
Kind of like that.
And I don't know, reading that
and then looking at Hugh Jackman.
He's ripped now.
No, he is, but I want to see some scrappy,
unibrowed Armenian playing him
who just doesn't even have a moral compass for the most part.
Just kind of barrels into rooms,
upsets people, and then goes on his
merry way. Because that's
what he is, right? That's his character. He's supposed to be
way more crazy and reckless.
I'm
glad they announced the next one's
going to be R-rated, which I'm sure is motivated by Deadpool's
success. And then
of course I've read lots of articles that suggest that,
oh no, now Hollywood's going to be looking to make the next Deadpool,
and they're going to think that the formula for a Deadpool-like success
involves things that it really didn't.
Because the reason I think, and that a lot of people think,
that Deadpool was successful was all that underground fan support
and just the love for that character that was out there and the way
they're sometimes day marketing yes exactly the way they promoted it was big yeah like that if
anything it might inspire an increase of movies that pretend to be something like they masquerade
around as an action movie and really they're more
chick flicky. I hate that
when you literally go and it's
not what you think and the biggest example
and we won't talk about it long because
I've done it before is the Grey with that
Liam Neeson movie where they crash
with the wolves and it's marketed
as like there's literally a part in the
commercial which really got me
fired up and that's why I took my date
to the movie where
Liam Neeson who's clearly
been through the ringer
scratches and hair all bedraggled
and stuff he's got these mini
liquor bottles from like an airline
and he's got them between his fingers
like brass knuckles and he
like duct tapes them to his hand and then
smashes the bottles on a rock so now he's got these brass knuckles and he like duct tapes them to his hand and then smashes the bottles on a
rock so so now he's got these glass knuckles and then he's got a knife in the other hand which he
also duct tapes to his hand so he can't drop it and the in the big alpha wolves over there and
he's just like come on then and you're just like fuck yeah this is a wolf fighting movie liam neeson
is going back to like, basic shit with a knife
and some sort of glass liquor bottle
knuckles and he's going to fight wolves with his
bare hands. That's the movie I thought
I was going to. But in fact, I went to this movie
that was really just a big metaphor.
Which movie is this? The Grey.
It's really just a big metaphor for accepting
loss and there's this
overarching thing about his wife's cancer
and just letting go. And oh man, it's the biggest biggest downer it's hard to even pay attention to that movie
it's slow is that the movie where there were constant flashbacks to like him living his
normal life with his cancer wife yes he brings his daughter around right and they run into another
group of people am i getting do i have the movie right no he doesn't have somebody with him no do
you know what movie i'm thinking of? It's post-apocalyptic.
It's kind of like Walking Dead almost.
Oh, you're talking about The Road, but that's his son.
Oh.
Oh, yeah.
The Road's a much better movie than The Grey.
Yes, it's better and even more depressing and even darker.
If you remember correctly, at the end of of the gray he fights his last fight
you know it's over
I had stopped paying attention 40 minutes ago
so I didn't give a shit what happened
I cared so much about that bullshit ending
that I found out that there was a deleted scene
where the camera comes back on
and he's leaning against the wolf
and the wolf's just breathing
breathing and then all of a sudden
the wolf stops breathing and you just see him and then all of a sudden the wolf stops breathing
and he and you just see him laying there and you don't see if he's alive or dead you just know that
the wolf is definitely dead a real john snow situation what's going on yeah yeah i know before
now as you say that i haven't watched i know there's a ton of like teaser content for game
of thrones and i knew going in that it was going to go too far.
So I haven't seen any of that,
any of those images. I know there's 36 still images.
I saw a single.
I looked at some of those just to see
if there would be character resurgences
or anything. I don't know that though.
It's anything but spoilers.
There were even little online clips
and I thought it just says Game of Thrones, House Targarygaryen season six and it's just like some game of thrones
music as a cgi banner of the lannisters fly and it like that's it but the pictures it's nothing
spoiler it's just like oh look it's varus eating an apple oh and there's tyrian having some wine
like yeah nothing i saw a trailer where you know in um in the previous
season of game of thrones there's like a place where you can try on all the faces for aria's
character yeah everyone's familiar with this well they showed those faces and they were people that
we knew and they were all people that died and then maybe i shouldn't even say the rest of it
but then there was a character that wasn't dead and and I'm like, oh, am I to infer that he dies this season?
And that's...
But I'm not even sure it was the guy I'm thinking
of. I think it was them. I'm just trying not to get too
excited about it, because I don't want...
I don't know. I want to temper my expectations
because of last season. Yeah,
I've given up on all teasers and
trailers, though. That used to be my favorite thing
about movies, and now it's my least favorite.
And the Deadpool thing, and the theater whenever the the previews started to
roll like i watched the crappy ones like i watched independence day 2 because i don't care about that
um but when batman versus superman came on i literally like stuck my fingers in my ears and
looked at my lap my girlfriend thought i was having like a panic attack or like getting sick
to my stomach or something she keeps and i like, I don't want to know!
I don't want to know!
Making a fucking scene in the theater.
Hey, I found out something about that movie that you will want to know.
You probably know it.
It's two hours and 38 minutes long.
Did you know that?
Oh, maybe it's 36.
That excites me.
Oh, really?
I saw the trailer and I won't give anything away,
but I thought it gave too much away.
So the fact that it's that long makes me think, oh, maybe there's much more to this than I
do know.
If I hear a movie is three hours long, it's probably either going to be really good or
The Revenant.
I don't know.
Or it's going to be the Oscar winner for best picture and best actor.
I know.
One or the other.
Oh, I'm so braced for the wave of shit I get about not liking The Revenant.
You should stop bringing it up.
You're the one who's bringing it up.
Oh, you don't think it'll be brought up when it wins the Oscar?
You don't like that movie, but you're fine watching almost three hours
of Braveheart-style epic about Batman fighting Superman.
That's going to have at least 34 minutes of filler
where Batman's love interest, vaguely established,
kind of pumps him up on how he can take on Superman
and you're the only fit man for me.
You're Earth's savior.
And then Superman, at least 20 minutes of him
trying to help humans and then he resents them quietly.
You kind of resent people who can't do things as well as you over time.
That's what it's going to be.
I'm good with that. You ruined it. God damn it yeah yeah i'm good with that i'm looking forward to it um i don't even know when it comes out
there's so many trailers and so much content for it but i think it's it's a while before it comes
out um but you know there's already content out there for the next Star Wars. And I'm not talking about the Rogue one. I'm talking about the Episode 8.
6, 7, 8.
Yeah.
I already saw a thing.
Let me find it.
It's like 10 seconds or something of actual content.
But for as little as it was, as much as I like that Star Wars movie it was worth it New Better Call Saul is out
oh is it
have you watched any of that yet
there's two episodes of the season out
so I've seen all there is I didn't know there was
a new season though so
I haven't seen any of that.
I heard that Netflix is going to be releasing it a day late,
if that makes any sense.
I've heard that, too, and I went on there,
and I couldn't find it,
so I don't know if they maybe haven't implemented it yet
or if I'm just shit at looking for shows.
Well, it's on there.
The previous seasons are definitely on there.
I don't know about this new season, though.
I'm excited to know there is a new season, though,
because I really enjoyed...
Are there one season or two seasons?
Because I've seen all there is, and I liked it.
I just don't remember.
That's probably my favorite show on right now
that comes on regular TV,
so not HBO or anything like that.
Yeah.
At some point, I'm going to get back into The Walking Dead.
It seems to have such a...
Really? I can't get into it.
Apparently, the new seasons are interesting. Do you guys want to watch Really? I can't get into it. Apparently the new seasons
are interesting. Do you guys want to watch this? It's 34
seconds. Sure. Okay.
Give me the second cue.
Yeah, there's too much walking
in The Walking Dead. It's
almost Lord of the Rings-esque
in how much time is spent watching
characters walk around. And I only got through the
first maybe two seasons.
I'm caught up on The Walking Dead,
and it's actually gotten...
The last season or two has been really good.
That's what I've heard.
Are you guys ready?
Yes.
Three, set, play. Cut.
Beautiful.
The best score in movie history.
Really gets you pumped up.
I feel like if you could go back in time to one of those old-timey battles,
like Braveheart or something like that,
and you could roll out that and the loudspeakers,
you'd get your guys so fucking pumped up,
they'd just lose their shit.
I was disappointed in the score in the last Star Wars.
Except for the old stuff. When they played
that, and part of me was like,
hey, that's from... Oh, wait. No, no.
Is that John Williams? Is that that guy's name?
What's his name? It is John Williams.
Yeah, I thought he was dead.
He should be dead. How old is this fucker?
Maybe he's
death pool material.
John Williams. It's oh this is it really that's death no no no 84 i believe jedi yeah yeah fuck um i think he did
the score again and that's why it wasn't good probably because he's 83 years old he was shaking
so goddamn much could Could be any notes.
John, we want you to do what you did
the first time around.
What?
He's been next to those percussion instruments
for fucking 80 years.
John, do you want cream in your coffee?
Do you want cream in your coffee?
Hey, what?
It's dementia as well. Okay.
And no teeth! He didn't bring his teeth to the-
I like the, huh? What?
I'm like, this isn't
my piano!
Dorothy!
He didn't bring his teeth to the-
Dorothy's been dead for 30 years, John!
Oh, anyway. Anyway.
What would you like to talk about, Woody? Do you have any other topics that you would like to talk about?
Is this do I want to bring up the drama thing?
Yeah.
I mean, I'm good not talking about it, to be honest.
It's not that I want to shy away from it.
It's that I feel like it's not good entertainment anymore.
Yeah, and I feel like the three of us just like, and plus Chiz like talked about it for like uh you know 30 minutes or something yeah before the show started
i forgot about the show like i we text each other we all coordinated we can start at a normal time
and then like the white boy video dropped and i was i watched it and then i made a response to it
and then i hooked up with you guys and you guys weren't talking about the show like i still didn't
know we were supposed to be doing it so we watched white boys video then we watched my
video and like we personally been talking about it for ages I'm not shying
away from it I just feel like like oh my god entertaining am I gonna go into the
seventh time where I explain why I'm frustrated with white boy and and you
know that when he says things about me whatever whatever whatever you want to
hear more about that aren't you uploading
a video it's up yeah oh yeah would you just upload another video so go watch what he's video that'll
give you a full super up-to-date explanation on the whole thing you can just go there and watch
that exactly as it stands now you know white boy this somehow makes its way to you let me know if
you want to talk that's where it is let me know if you want to talk. That's where it is. Let me know if you want to talk. And that's all I want to say about it.
Not because I'm trying to bury it or run from it or anything,
because I don't think it's a good show.
Yeah.
Remind me to tell you a thing after the show,
because I got good news today.
What's going on with you guys and your actual real day-to-day lives
that don't involve people on the internet or children who need a good beating or anything like that good beating
uh i don't know woody crash very stressful for me now we have these deadlines we were trying to
reset one of the servers and it's just self-imposed like nothing happens if it goes a week later we didn't even tell the players yet but um i've been up late working on that and um so i'm working extra
hard on woody craft and maybe i'm a little cranky you know because i've been up late um i'd like to
fix my sleep schedule that's a thing i've been eating better. I got a physical a week or two ago.
So all my blood levels were great, except my cholesterol was a little high.
My good cholesterol was a little low.
Can I ask you a question?
Blood pressure was great.
On average, how many steaks do you consume a month?
Two.
Oh, man.
You say two?
I'm about to sound really unhealthy.
Yeah, that's about right.
I've had one so far this month.
I thought you ate a steak every week, first of all.
I used to.
I know there was a time when I ate a lot of steak.
I got real addicted to Outback Steakhouse.
I really liked their steak and um i that whatever kind of seasoning and i was definitely eating two or three steaks a week
um oh you're talking about going out to eat for a steak or steaks you make or cooking yeah yeah i
mean oh if i if i buy steaks then then like i end up eating the whole pack because nobody else likes
steak so like i'll oh that's a good that's a good situation to be in in a home where you're the only one who likes steak.
I'd say I eat like
8 to 12 a month.
I used to have one
either every Thursday or Friday.
It was like a schedule thing.
People wonder why you've got so many
poop stories.
I eat about
15 to 25 pounds of red meat a month. That'll do the trick but then my wife cut me back i think
it was intentional i'm actually pretty sure it was intentional and uh it's not consistent anymore
but i'd say about two two it's always the same thing thursday or friday but maybe every other
week now i uh i definitely been eating like shit it's about time to go into another healthy kick again
me too I hate doing it
but I'm going to
it's coming soon I'm not sure how soon
like a day will come
when I just flip the switch and it's done
and it'll go from there but
like right now I'm procrastinating flipping the switch
because it's like oh but I just
I just bought the ingredients for banana bread
I want to make some banana bread oh I want to make some banana bread.
Oh, I'm going to make the cream-filled banana bread.
So I'm just thinking of all the calorie.
I'm going to get all the nasty junk food out of my system,
and then it's about time to go on a fitness kick,
and I drop my calories down to something stupid and work out again.
I have less nastiness to cut in the first place.
I'm not consuming large amounts of, would you say bread pudding?
Banana bread.
Banana bread or any of that stuff.
But what I will do is I go through these kicks.
I clean up on the snacks.
I fix my sleep schedule, which to me is also a big part of cleaning up the snacks.
I no longer midnight snack or whatever.
That's huge because of late night.
And I fix the sleep schedule.
I clean up the snacks
and then i add exercise and my exercise is usually some work related thing i got like two cords uh
a cord and a half of wood or something that needs to be split and axes and we're going to give that
a go and see what we think of it bring gloves to that job i will i. I actually bought a... The materials are... The axe has arrived today.
The pickeroon is in the mail.
A pickeroon.
A pickeroon.
Yeah, it's like an axe, but it's kind of pointy and you just stab...
I know what a pickeroon is.
For people that don't know, it's like an axe, but it's pointy, like a little hook, and you
just sort of grab the wood and move it around.
Do you have a splitting maw?
I have a splitting axe.
I did a lot of research on this i actually do have a splitting maw but it's it's shitty and it it's not very
sharp and uh but everyone on the web seems to think that a splitting axe is better than a
splitting maw they it's it's a little lighter a little sharper and um can i ask why you're not
using a log splitter like like a hydraulic armed quick?
I think I will.
I'll probably own one of those at one time.
But the real reason is I thought that I might enjoy.
You can make your own.
I started looking at plans for that.
I don't know if I'm down for it.
It's a pretty simple build.
We did it in ninth grade.
It's a simple build to build a simple one.
build we did it in uh ninth grade it's a simple build to build a simple one but the one i would buy like would cut in both directions and have and be powered off the tractor yeah or or um there's
another one that's like a flywheel activated so it splits super fast and like to build that would
be trickier but um uh the reason I haven't bought a splitter yet,
like a hydraulic splitter for people listening,
is that I wanted to swing the axe and see if I enjoyed it.
There were a handful of people online who were like,
you know, I don't kill myself,
but I like to go out there and swing the axe every so often
and it keeps me sexy.
I think it would be funny to split logs with explosives.
Like what if you could somehow drill holes and then place explosive charges so that when off it just like split into a bunch of perfect pieces.
There's a wedge that does that.
I don't know how it works exactly, but there's YouTube videos about it.
And basically you hammer it in and you put some gunpowder in there and then you remotely diffuse it and it splits it.
But it seems awful because one the logs
you get like it could be damn near shrapnel yeah it seems like it's something that's more of a um
what an inefficient way to get reasonable pieces yeah oh and by the way like
now we got firewood boys would you like to throw the gunpowder wood in your fireplace
no yeah right no i also think that i could do it faster if i just used an axe instead of Would you like to throw the gunpowder wood in your fireplace? No. Yeah, right?
I also think that I could do it faster if I just used an axe
instead of running 100 yards away every three minutes
to go push the plunger down on my TNT box.
No, that's ludicrous.
Yes.
What a first-world solution to a non-problem.
I'm going to do that
That sounds like a lot of fun
My dad has a tree that's like
There are sections of it that are just massive
I'm going to do that
I guess at first I'll drill a hole right through the core of it
And put explosives in there
But then maybe experiment with maybe
Like a pattern of them out into wedges
I don't know much
I don't know much about explosives
But I'm going to learn.
Yeah.
I haven't asked about
your dad in a while.
How's the man cave going?
Yeah, that's what I'll tell you
after the show.
His man cave is ridiculous.
That thing's coming along well.
He's got... They haven't put the hardy plank on, but I think that and the interior is ridiculous. Oh, his man... Yeah, that thing's coming along well. He's got...
They haven't put the hardy plank on,
but I think that that and the interior is lacking.
But he's got the windows, the doors,
the plumbing,
and the exterior insulation.
He's going to do some sort of foam or blown insulation.
I don't know which in the ceiling of the thing.
That hasn't come yet, but I'm guessing...
Do you think he's going to take up any new hobbies
when he moves in there?
Like, maybe he'll get into a video game or a sport that he never watched before. come yet but um do you think he's guessing any new hobbies when he moves in there like maybe
he'll get into a video game or a sport that he never watched before i don't know it seems like
when you have much time and he just feels free for once that he might just delve into something
he's never been into yeah so he's he's already right there at his shop so they do they work on
cars a lot that's what i think he really likes to tinker on cars. They work on transmissions and rear ends
and tune-ups and rebuilding motors
and stuff all the time.
They're usually restoring an old car
of one kind or another.
He lets people use his shop a lot,
like friends and relations and friends of friends.
There's always someone over there to bullshit with
and hang out with.
It's not that he really needs something to do it's that he needs somewhere to go
so i think i'm gonna put like i've got i've got air hockey ping pong and uh like a full like eight
foot pool uh i think it's eight or nine maybe nine foot uh slate pool table so i told him like
any of those things that he would like to put over there he can put over there so. So we're going to add one of those to the mix and get him a TV.
I'm going to get some internet ran out there for him
so he can get a full entertainment system thing going on.
Yeah, get him a NFL package or whatever he watches.
Oh, fuck, no.
He hates sports.
He absolutely despises sports.
He doesn't watch any of them because he couldn't care less.
He doesn't watch Georgia?
I've got a building question.
He doesn't know who the coach is uh he couldn't name a player
um he probably doesn't know the name of the stadium all right so here's the thing about
building um your father's having his man cave done now and perhaps you've been around contractors
more than me i don't know i love my current contractor he's really easy to get along with.
We've added stuff to it that he's doing at no charge.
And my last contractor, he would take stuff we agreed to and add charges for it.
I don't want to make this... One was the cleaning, right?
It was like cleaning was included.
And he's like, well, you know, we were really just going to clean floors.
How about you pay 900 more for this other stuff like how are you only
gonna clean floors fuck off you just like you're coming to me like your ATM
machine this guy's the opposite of that this guy's great you know throw doors on
there he's like you know could you just buy the hinges yes yeah that seems more
than fair but it's taking a while and most days nothing happens how many
people are actually on-site none most of the time it feels but when it's taking a while. And most days nothing happens. How many people are actually on site?
None most of the time.
But when it's going?
Two to four.
It feels like, and they're good, right?
I'm very happy with the work he's doing.
I'm happy with the price he's charging.
I would hire him again.
But it feels like it's eight days work getting done over the course of six weeks.
And I wonder if that's reasonable and customary.
Well, I really couldn't say because the contractor that he's using is kind of is a friend.
It's someone who's generally like, like he was already he was hanging out over there.
And dad was like, hey, Rick, why don't you build me a thing over here?
Let me show you what I'm thinking of.
And, you know, he knows the guy already.
Dad said that he was a little upset that they weren't working as much.
He was like, well, they didn't work the last two days.
But they've thrown that thing up in like a week of working.
It's two guys, and I'll say this about them too.
These are two ex-cons.
These are two rough and rowdy gentlemen.
They're the soggy bottom boys.
Mine are rougher.
Okay, good.
The soggy bottom boys.
You're going to force me to explain who this gentleman is.
He's the one who said that they refer,
they call me the bulldog.
He told me all these stories.
He's the one who knocks.
He has, so he doesn't have all the fingers on his right hand.
And he told me this story as we were working about how it affected his entire child and his life
and how his father disowned him and how he got into all these altercations throughout his life
and beaten and roughed up time and time again because of his hand.
And he had a huge criminal past.
He's been arrested several times I'm pretty
sure one of them was some sort of underage up in here all mine got fired
this I have subcontractors who are no longer working here one of the delays
because they were in fistfights with each other on site fair enough that's
rough well this one told me a story about about this one told me a story
about fucking up
three Mexicans with a 2x4
with some nails driven through it.
Oh yeah? Mine are Mexicans.
Mine commits hate crimes.
Oh, only hate crimes?
Well, in any case.
Yeah, yeah.
Some excellent Deadpool dialogue.
We weren't as good yeah
um but uh yeah and like i said you know and i don't even think the i didn't see anything about
the scuffle i think it was on some other site but they got fired they couldn't come back because
there was a scuffle and um that was part of the delay the other part is weather people don't even
know what i'm doing with the stable.
So a lot of people have seen my videos
where I worked on the stable a bunch
and after Chiz left,
or even before Chiz left a little,
like Chiz left and I try to work on it alone,
but it's really hard some of these jobs to do solo.
So Jackie and I did a little bit,
but, and then Woody Craft got super busy
and I started focusing a lot of time on that and winter
came and i just wasn't like making progress so i have contractors coming in and they're kind of
doing the rest of the exterior they're gonna lay the shingles on the roof they're gonna put the
hardy plank on the sides and uh yeah that never made sense to me honestly for for you to be doing
that because i just felt like your time was worth more. I lost weight. I got tan. I was happy.
If it's a pleasure project, that's one thing.
I still felt like
up until the point where it
wasn't fun anymore, you should be doing it. At any point when
you're like, this is becoming a job that's when you
should be like okay and now i'm going to find somebody else to do it because you know your
time's valuable i hear you elsewhere uh you know i i look forward to doing some more um you know
and i'll go out there i'm gonna there's more to do there's there's doors to be crafted there's
electrical to be run and you know but those are things that are easier to poke away with one
person yeah it doesn't seem like you're dreading it yeah no i'm kind of looking forward to it um but like the things that
i didn't do uh the siding in particular they're like 16 feet long and this is just something that
kind of a two-man job they're 16 feet long and they're like flexible so if you hold it in the
middle the two sides are like wobble wobble wobble like a tape measure and it's a three it's
at least a two-man job yeah yeah you don't want to that they did it with four um when they brought
the people in and uh you know so like doing it by yourself some jobs are four times easier when
there's two people and this is one of them so um so i hired a crew to do it and I love them. I love the guy.
But sometimes it's rain.
Sometimes it's delays.
Sometimes, I don't know.
I'm just like, come on, man.
And there's no big rush.
It's not like with this house, I felt rushed.
I really want to live here.
I really, really wanted to live here.
We bought our dream house.
You said two weeks.
It took three and a half months.
Like, there's a rush.
I've never heard a good contractor story from anyone.
With the stable? I've never even owned a home.
And the one contractor story I remember from growing up is my parents moved into a new place.
And I must have been like 11 or so.
And they were redoing a ton of shit in it.
And this contractor they hired was this dude they
knew from church and he would like come over he'd just be at our house when i got home from school
and i would say like hey what's up you know mr smith or whatever and he would like say just say
a bible verse at me like quote it at me like ah you know uh ye who studies hard is in the way of
the lord and it's like oh all right you fucking weirdo he
would take fucking forever always falling back on the excuse of like well
you know I've been really you know the Lord's been taking up a lot of my time
in other ways he said that I heard him say that to my parents and they and
because I went to church with him they had to be like oh well you know the Lord
you know I guess he's really busy with our fucking contract he had a lot to get
done one day in particular the day that he got fired
and i had a friend of him we were playing basketball when i was trying to get good at
basketball one of those phases and my friend was pretty good and this contractor was just like hey
how about i you know take a break and come out and play you know some one-on-one maybe a little
tournament with you guys i'm like first of all you're 42 years old ish you're we're children
you know basically and i know that you have a lot to get done because, number one,
my dad yelled at you last time you were here.
Number two, my mom was clearly, like, looking worried in the living room.
I'm like, I really hope, you know, Mr. Smith gets this done before your father gets home today.
And, no, he just comes out and starts playing basketball with us.
He beats me because he's an adult and I'm a child and I'm not good.
My friend, who was very good, like, grew like grew way quicker to was beating this adult man and
one-on-one as he's supposed to be hammering in some fucking drywall or
something and he gets so mad at this kid beating him that my friend like set up
to block him from going to the net once and this dude just lowered his shoulder
and charged into my 11 year old friend just bowled him back and like
immediately after he scored the point there i think he knew that he went too far because my
friend was laying on the ground i was just like shoot dude sean are you okay and he's like yeah
i don't what's wrong with this guy well you know they go back to the kitchen and get working on
that uh that you know crown molding they want me to get done and so when i got home that night i
was just my dad was like have you been keeping an eye on mr smith making sure he gets it done i'm like yeah he played one-on-one
basketball with me and sean this afternoon and just ran sean over and skinned his arm he's like
are you shitting me are you shitting me brown molding isn't done in there and you're telling
me that he played basketball with you and yeah he got anyway so no no good contractors out there
on this thing just to wrap it up like if he was
remodeling a master bathroom and we were forced to use the guest room that would seem more urgent
than the stable there's just nothing urgent about the stable yet when i look out there and
maybe they work one and a half days a week i'm like come on. You know? Yeah. Please hurry. Hey, I want to talk a little politics, but probably not what you think.
I want to talk about the real political meltdown that happened in South Carolina over the last week.
What happened?
Well.
Oh, wait.
I don't know if this is in public.
Oh, it's not?
No, no.
Then how do I know it?
You must have talked to the politicians involved. i got it from the internet like i read it on the subreddit or on youtube comments or something
nobody told me anything i just oh you didn't talk to any of the politicians involved i don't know
what the news is it must be breaking i'm not going to say anything that i think is private
all of my information comes from Facebook and Twitter and Reddit.
Okay.
So I guess that in Wings of Redemption's yard in South Carolina,
there were some Hillary Clinton political signs placed there by his mother.
Now, in case you don't know, his mother and I, and he, and he, have a dispute over the ownership of the home.
And it's not really a dispute as much as it is just a bad deal, really.
His mom owns the house, but Wings paid that mortgage off at least once.
He paid towards it for some period of time, I think.
I'm not positive.
But yeah, apparently, for a couple of years, he was pulling the train on that debt.
And he was told by her that, like the house, but that doesn't work.
She didn't live there while he was pulling the train, so ownership felt to be his.
That house that he is in in his videos, that's his house.
But his mom is saying it's her house.
It's the other way around, quite frankly.
That's his mom's house. On paper, legally speaking, it's her house. It's the other way around, quite frankly. That's his mom's house on paper, legally speaking, it's her house. However, he did pay the mortgage
there for a number of years while living there by himself, not necessarily by himself, but
while his mother was gone elsewhere. But now she's back in the picture and she's like,
well, this is my house still. And that really came to a head.
That thing came to a head when it came to the political signs,
as you probably know.
Can I interrupt?
Just real quick, a little quick detail to drop in there.
She says that what he paid is called rent.
She owned the house.
He was living there.
The money that he paid is rent.
And he doesn't have any ownership.
And he feels like, no, it wasn't rent.
I paid the mortgage.
It should be my house.
So those are the two sides of the story.
Yeah.
So she put a Trump political sign out in the yard, apparently.
Yes, she's a Trump supporter.
She likes Trump. I thought you said Hillary.
I know I was wrong. I'm correcting myself.
But put a Trump sign out there, and of course, Wings is a Bernie Sanders guy.
And there was such a meltdown over this that it came to the point where he might have to go elsewhere.
And he put it out there that he was looking for somewhere to go, and that he would pay $500 a month rent.
Plus internet connection.
Plus internet connection. Plus internet connection.
So like $600-ish.
Yeah.
Hmm.
That seems...
You looking for a roommate, Taylor?
I can feel you, Connie.
Like, you know what?
Yeah, we've got a spare.
Is Melissa there?
Yeah, and that's...
Hey, say this to Melissa.
You should say this to Melissa.
Be like, the guys are offering to pay us $1,000 a month
to let Wings live with us.
And if we keep them here for three months,
we get an extra $1,000.
Say that to her.
She's in the middle of playing a game right now,
and I can tell you there's a 0% chance
that even a moment of consideration would be used.
You could up that.
A moment of consideration for three months? I considered it for a moment of consideration would be used. You could up that. For three months?
I considered it for a moment.
Right?
I don't have a giant palatial estate to just, you know,
I'll just rent out the West Wing.
I can't do that.
If I have another person living with me, me and Melissa,
it's going to be, we are going to be intimately close to each other.
We'd be on the couch together.
Often.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Well, I wish him the best and all that.
I thought that was such a ridiculous thing to have that meltdown over because, like,
him even bothering with, anyway.
I don't think so.
I think that it's a thing that is kind of valid to contest, you know?
Like, if he paid the mortgage, then he might have
been paying way more than the going weight for rent.
I'm just inventing this, but one would
guess.
If that's the case,
then maybe he's entitled
to some sort of
back. It's not
that the signs are
a ridiculous thing. It's that something was going to
be the catalyst. There's too many details to even know.
Like, what percentage of this mortgage did he pay?
It doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter.
It literally doesn't matter if he paid 100%.
Legally, you're right.
But I feel like, yeah, morally, spiritually,
in just terms of right and wrong.
We all know Wing's mom's a bad person.
I mean, she just is.
I don't know anything about her. all wings mom's a bad person i mean she just is i don't know anything about her but oh she's a bad person is she kicking wings out of his house
i think he's frustrated enough that he's considering moving out she's definitely
threatened to kick him out before yeah she's not a nice lady in any regard i mean it's his
mother sure he loves her but i think she made some big mistakes along the way.
I feel like I don't know the current her.
You know, the her that moved back and lives there now
might be a different one than the one who's made mistakes
along the way.
I'm not sure.
You can see in those walking videos.
I don't like how they treat him.
I know we give him a rough time every now and then,
probably in some people's eyes,
but I really care about Wings. I like him. He has a place in my heart. I genuinely care give him a rough time every now and then probably in some people's eyes but it's I really care about Wings I like him he has a place
in my heart I genuinely care about him
but I can tell that he doesn't have
I don't think bad family life
I don't care for his mom or how she treats
him at all just seeing her
the way she interacts in all of those videos
anytime she's ever been on camera in one of his
videos I can tell that there's just like
she's just
a shitty person.
Hmm.
I don't like how she treats wings.
I hear you.
Yeah.
I often felt that like, well, I don't see what you see in those videos.
I feel like the whole walking effort could have gone better if he had a better support system at home.
You know, if he came home to like cheers and support and stuff, then that might have been a really cool thing.
Instead, he was really hoeing that row, I was going to say.
Hoeing that row on his own.
You know, really kind of just working that thing where you know he comes home and they
offer him sweet tea like come on guys like let's all be same team here you just undid the walk
and um yeah uh you know i feel really bad for wings like if this is all the situation because
this is really shitty for him if he feels like he's been tricked like imagine him like he all
of his most successful years on YouTube
poured into this mortgage.
And now to be told like,
oh, thanks for paying really high rent basically for me
while I was out of the picture.
You know, even if legally he doesn't have a leg to stand on,
ethically, that really sucks.
Yes, ethically is the word I was looking for.
I was like morally, spiritually, ethically is better.
If he overpaid for a couple of years
thinking that he was building equity in the house,
then yeah.
But I'm sure he was never told
he was building equity in the house.
I doubt anyone was like,
this is your place now, Wings.
It was more like, you've got this to yourself.
I don't know the story of him and his mom.
I don't even think I've ever
seen her on one of his videos.
Does she ever show up there?
Sometimes.
You said she treats him poorly in those.
What does she do that's so shitty?
Just her gentle attitude to him.
You can tell
that she doesn't want to be on camera.
She's not happy that he's there. She's very short with him.
She has no interest in being part of his show over there.
She'll always be sort of dry with him and dismissive.
And it's clear she doesn't really care what he's saying or she isn't listening to him.
And that's always the case.
I've seen that time and time again.
And she hasn't lived by him recently.
She's just coming back into his life. I don't know what the timeline is but i know she was gone for um he
mentioned living with chalene there for a couple of years which seems like a long longer than it
actually happened but um he did live there with a woman and her kids you know just them they're
living as a family for at least a year or two uh you know with no mom in the in the picture at all
and him paying all the bills and you know being the mom in the in the picture at all and him paying all
the bills and you know being the man of the house that's the lady he dated who didn't like pay for
anything and didn't work that's the lady that woody and i didn't care for very much because
we felt like she was bad for him i think i didn't feel like she was supportive and um
my observation of her is she was one of those people that was kind of wired to be negative
by default not that she never smiled but that you know debbie downer yeah she was one of those people that was kind of wired to be negative by default. Not that she never smiled, but that
Debbie Downer.
She was just a person who spent
most of her time unhappy.
Are you talking to Melissa?
What are you looking at in the sky?
No, she's playing
this old PS2 game where you
roll a ball around and you just collect
shit and it makes a bigger and bigger
ball. It's so simple and old but I
can't stop looking at it it's really interesting
I thought she was available to
pitch the wings question too
I think that's funny
I would like to know how much it would take
because I mean
you know
there's a lot of fans out there
I would but in my head
that's already leaning almost in the direction
of being mean to wings passively.
And I don't like that.
I was just thinking if I were to get Jackie on here and ask,
I feel like she might respond negatively enough.
It's putting someone in an uncomfortable position
where it's like, hey, you obviously,
I'm trying to make you be hyperbolic right now
for the sake of comedy, so say super high a number, and then we can all laugh
about how preposterous the very idea
is that you would be in the same building
as him. It's just shit
shitty. It's shitty.
Hey, I did it for free. You did.
You actually, at cost.
At cost.
Well, at least now you've got a really
spacious bathroom right
um do you use that bathroom that you read oh yeah that's the main yeah that's the main bathroom i
always use every morning yeah i i like that a lot um you know it was i i like it yeah i wanted to
ask you this when you said you redid that bathroom for wings, if he had not been coming, were you still planning on redoing it?
And you just, this kind of spurred you.
Oh, so you wouldn't have it all.
No, there were, there was no, there were absolutely no plans to do it at all.
It wasn't even a topic of discussion or a thought on anyone's head.
It literally happened maybe two, we, I think we had already agreed to do it.
Right.
Cause at some point I was like, let's do it.
And he was like, all right.
And he set a date.
And I was like, all right, that's the date.
And it was like, shit, this is going to happen.
And it was like three weeks out or something.
And I was in the shower.
I got in there.
And it was just kind of a cheap plastic shower with a sliding door.
And I got in there and I was washing up.
And I bumped my right elbow into the wall.
And it hurt because it had one of those
handles on it and I hit the handle at such an angle
that it got my funny bone and I was like
ah fuck with the soap in my eye
and I thought
what if I'm 450 pounds now
and then I just looked down
and I realized that my shoulders
were about as wide as the shower
was maybe there's like this much
more room and I'm just like he won't fit in here.
And if he does, something bad could happen.
This thing could break.
I just don't think he fits in here.
And he's able to close the doors.
And I told Kitty, I was like, this isn't going to work.
And to my shock, she was like, oh, well, let's just put a big old shower in there.
Because at first, I was like, he's either going to be taking a bath in your big bathtub.
She's got a big jacuzzi-like tub in her bathroom.
It's really big.
Or, as I said to her, we can hose him down outside.
I was like, I don't know what else we're going to fucking do.
There is nothing grosser than someone working out all day, every day,
and instead of a shower, taking a hot bath at the end of the day.
Just stewing in your own filth, and then you get out and put on clean clothes
and you act like you're clean, but you're not.
We know you're not. It's gross.
Take a shower.
If I take a bath, I take a real quick
shower right after.
Because I feel like...
Yeah, I just don't feel like baths are
cleaning. If I take a bath,
it's 0%
about getting clean. If I want to get clean, I take a shower. If take a shower if i want to get in the bathroom to read or put one of those
bath bombs in there get really soft skin my baths are so warm they'd be sweaty in there you know
like i don't come out like fresh i come out i from i emerge from my petri dish that it was like
lobster skin like just red everywhere because i turn that that water up so hot oh it's great um what was i gonna say something oh oh wings i god i don't mean to
pile so he he said he was 450 in my video right yes that's my secret um he was 410 ish around the
walking videos i think he broke 410 he might have been 408 or 409 one day um perhaps so
in that period of time what is it a year he gained 40 pounds like yeah i so he's 450 as a parallel
i turned 43 recently right my wife's five months older so she's been 43 and we were talking about
it and we were like i don't, something about 42 was 40, right?
Something about 43 is like, you know,
maybe roughly the same, and you guys probably
don't even think this way, because you're so young
and these numbers are outside of your thing.
Like, when I was 16, it was like, oh, you turned like 52?
52 is the same as 51, like what are you talking about?
But me, I'm, to be 45 and then threaten like 46 and 47 to me feel like 50-ish.
And 50-ish is like legit different age bracket than 40-ish.
You're in the last year of your early 40s.
After this, you're in your mid-40s.
Undeniably.
And God forbid your late 40s.
And then your early 50s. Yeah yeah and then late 40s are almost
synonymous with early 50s right i think um i i don't know like but somehow here someone's 47
you just think 50 yeah i i'll agree with that you know it's not exactly 50 but it's yeah yeah
it's in the same neighborhood as a 50 year old right um wings going from 410 to 450 i was like ah
if he goes just a little more 465 470 you hear 470 you think almost five right like you you
it won't be too long before he's a lot closer to if he goes in this direction before he's a lot
closer to five than four and that i hate to see that i'll make this pledge now when he hits 550 we're putting in an even bigger
fucking shower it's gonna be like a goddamn car wash getting him back over here
we're gonna hose that motherfucker down i'm gonna have one of those big brushes that shoots the
out of the bristles he's probably very sensitive about this.
If he hears this, then he
Wings, you gotta know, man.
Boogie is the one who's up there in the 500s
and you see where Boogie
is. It's not looking good.
What is Boogie way? About
550. Something
like that. Yeah, Wings is on the precipice.
He needs to get...
Man, that sucks if wings got down
to 410 because that's just like a razor's edge of if he had continued i think if he saw like a 399
on the scale one day he'd be like holy shit this is moving like yeah i can't see in the mirror
did you see my video with wings the dual comm uh i watched the first bit of it i didn't at the end
he mentioned why he stopped walking.
And he took full responsibility for stop walking.
Obviously, he's the one that stopped walking.
There's no getting around that.
But he's like, Keemstar put out like a tweet or a rumor that he wasn't actually walking.
And he's like, I was.
But he started getting all this hate that like he wasn't actually doing a mile or he was just sort of cheating or like there
weren't there wasn't enough like landmarks shown in the videos that like he could have possibly
cheated or something like that and um and that all the hate he got from that put him in a negative
place and then he gained a pound or two because you do that right like when you lose weight it
doesn't go in a straight line and a pound or two for a guy who's in the 400s is you know what for you might be like
a half a pound or something you know that happens every day so um uh anyway he gained a pound or two
combined with all the hate and he took a day off and then another day then another day and then he
just sort of oh on day three he walked, wasn't as good a walker,
and just dropped the whole thing.
And it was the hate combined with the weight gain of a pound or two,
the fluctuation, made him want to quit.
And, yeah.
I still think he's going to lose it eventually.
Eventually I think he's going to lose the weight because, really,
he just – he hasn't stuck with it long enough yet to see, to have like that first huge breakthrough of like, wow, this is working, you know, where it was like, if he, I guarantee if he got down to like 390.
Yeah, that's for most people.
It's like, oh, well, you know, whoop-dee-doo, you're still 390.
But for him, that'd be like, holy shit.
He looked different if he was 60 pounds smaller.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, that's not hidden.
I think so.
And then just to stretch it and make it 350,
if he lost 100 pounds, you'd look at him and be like,
whoa, yeah, he did a thing there.
Not done, but he did a thing there.
It'd be very noticeable.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's what he needs to I mean he should aim for 350
and I'm not going to tell
I feel like he's looking at 200 and it's an insurmountable
thing but 350 should be his goal
you won't die at 350 you won't explode
at 350 there's plenty of
350 pound people who can go about their
day to day lives and do normal shit
when I do it I look at the trend
you know I just
want to be lighter than i was two
weeks ago you know like if that's the case then i'm on the right path and um you know if he did
that i wouldn't care if he lost a pound well he should look at like uh like a 300 cc motorcycle
and he should be like do i weigh less or more this week and and go at it that way yeah i think maybe
the way he's thinking about it i'm just gonna glaze over that is like i feel like in his head maybe he's thinking like oh man when i'm 190
everything's gonna be smooth sailing but that's just so out of his realm of possibility like
not to say he can't but that he just probably doesn't even trust himself it's like a fantasy
like what you think about when you buy a lottery ticket.
You know you're not going to win but you think about like all the stupid shit you would do if you did.
Like I think if he just set his sights more on like a 260, 270
to where you see somebody that big.
It's like yeah, they're clearly big.
They're a heavy person but they're not like
it's not crippling their everyday life, you know.
I think maybe if Wing's mom were to leave him the house for some reason
and he were there in his own recognizance
and he didn't have so many negative inputs,
maybe he could get his life back on track.
But I feel like until he's out of the household that's supporting that stuff,
he's never going to really get it going because it takes so much consistency.
And that's really hard with temptation there 24-7.
I go on these really strict diets and what I have found is that if I ever break the diet
even a little, then I kind of lose my willpower to continue with the diet.
It's like, oh, I ate those four breadsticks yesterday.
It's like, why even bother?
Now the diet's up.
Why even fucking bother? Let's just have a cheeseburger and get it fucking over with you piece of shit
like that's what i think about myself but if i'm able to stay strict to that diet and be like yeah
it's been eight weeks and since i've had a coca-cola i bet if i had one now it'd be so sweet
it hurt my teeth you know and i'm just like keep going with it and when i'm hungry i go to a fast
food place and i get a grilled chicken salad and only eat the chicken.
And, you know, I'm proud of myself after that.
But if I ever, like, eat a burger instead, I'm like, well, fuck this diet.
It's over.
I've ruined it.
I've ruined it.
And I'm sure he goes through the same thing.
And he has to stay consistent a lot longer than I do.
Like, when I go on a diet, I'm dropping 10 to 15 pounds or something like that as quickly as I can.
Yeah, you're doing speed runs.
He's got to be in for years of the long haul.
He has a marathon.
And I know I couldn't beat that marathon.
I couldn't go years without soda, years without.
Even, I mean, he could have a soda every now and then.
But I like soda in my life.
I like it being part of my life.
I can't go years without soda. I want it there. So he's got a real challenge, and I just don't think he can do it in my life. I like it being part of my life. I can't go years without soda.
I want it there.
So he's got a real challenge,
and I just don't think he can do it in that environment.
I feel bad for him.
I really do.
I love Wings.
He's a great guy.
He's got tons and tons of flaws, as we all do.
But I've got such history
and such an interesting relationship with that dude.
I wish the best for him.
And like everybody else,
I'd love to see that 200-pound version of Wings of Redemption, but in that environment, I just feel like it's too much of a
challenge. Maybe the moving out would be good. Maybe that'll be just what he needs. That'd be
cool. That's what, that's what I was thinking or that, or, you know, everybody, I feel like,
I mean, there are people who live at home with their parents, like in extended periods,
like into their thirties, like wings is trending toward, I guess.
But I feel like it really helps a person to sort of grow and spread their arms and be away from their parents.
And, yeah, it'd be a positive experience, I think, if you left the house.
So, call it a show?
I think so.
All right.
Painkiller Nearly, episode 80.
Bye, guys.