Painkiller Already - The Chimp Bit Off His What?!: PKA 716

Episode Date: September 7, 2024

I'm going to go with that. Our last minute cancellation on the guest. So it's just the boys tonight. Taylor. This episode is brought to you by our merch and lock and load. Wonderful products. We'll discuss more later. Kyle, you have been overjoyed to discuss this monkey show with me.

And I think it's almost for the best. I haven't watched it yet. I put it on my list. I'm going to watch it. So it's Max. What is. I haven't watched it yet. I put it on my list. I'm gonna love it. So it's max What is it called again? Chimp crazy crazy crazy? So it's made by the same guy who made Tiger King But he made such a name for himself amongst you know crazy people who keep exotic animals That he couldn't stick his name on the project

So he does what he he's like so we hired a stand-in director and I'm like So you hired an actor to pretend he's a director so that you can hide in the shadows and make your Exposé and they won't know what's coming. That's what he did the guy he hired Perfect. It's perfect. He hires this guy who went to jail prison. This guy went to prison for iguana smuggling or some shit. So when he goes to the chimp people, they're like, no cameras, no. Connie doesn't want to talk to you. She's the chimp queen.

You might be trying to take her down. He's like, no, no, no, my name is Ignacio. I went to prison for, he doesn't sound like this at all. He's like, actually half black. I went to prison for smuggling iguana. The iguana is a beautiful creature. And they're like, oh shit, we didn't know that you 14 months in prison for iguanas. You're a man. Come on in and talk to us. Basically, there's three episodes of this shit. It's on HBO or max or whatever they want to call

it. Come out a new episode every Sunday. And they talk about the chimp industry as it were, which apparently Taylor is Missouri. Yeah, the chimp industry. I saw a map. All roads, all roads, all chimp roads lead to Missouri because of y'all's crazy laws. You can do anything because of the freedom y'all have. The freedom of Missouri. Yes. Yeah. So that y'all have those exotic animal auctions where they'll run like kudu and gazelle and zebra like through it It looks like a catalog from that scene, right? But it's kangaroos and shit that people are bidding on because you can get whatever you want up in Missouri I suppose well these chimps are all coming from this one old lady named Connie She's the champ fucking queen and she's been breeding chimps in Missouri at her place since like the 70s or something

she's old as fuck now, but All the chimp you've ever seen over here in the 70s aren't old just say yeah, but I mean Collars were cool, man She so In each if you've ever seen a champ on like a hallmark card, you know that hallmark car where it's like Couldn't afford an exotic dancer. This is the best exotic dancer I could afford and it's like a champ coming out of a birthday cake or something Yeah, those are all Tonka the champ. He is the he was the most attractive champ of all time He is the fucking Elvis of chimps. That was a guy

That was Tonka the champ Yeah, that was a gay champ that then that card that you got you gave me a little gay It makes you a little gay apps. It does the champ if you've ever seen Any movies with like a chimp in it and I'm sure you have lots of kids movies used to always have like a kid Pallant around with a little monkey It's Tonka the champ. He was the goat Okay, but but the thing about champs is their lifespan is the same as ours So after six or seven though

You can't be piling around with little kids on a movie set anymore because you can bite people's faces off any minute now And so they put Alan Cummings is the actor who acted with him. He's famous after you saw him You'd recognize him. He's Irish guy And he and he's they interview him and he's, I did this movie with Tonka back in 92. And I loved him. He shows all these pictures with Tonka. And he's like, every time he'd see me, his eyes would light up and he'd rush to me. He begged, he would ask for permission to hug me. And when they gave the permission, he would shh, he would tremble with love when he hugged me and they told me that he had retired to Florida and I thought great I Always imagined Tonka in Florida in Palm Springs

Just gay people old people in Tonka and maybe I'm maybe a monkey Mai Tai But no, he's in Connie's prison in Missouri and seeing solitary confinement Yeah, he's rotting away in the solitary confinement he's sad and so they they sick peed on these people and they sue the fuck out of them. And- And Connie's a horrible person. In walks a new crazy lady

because Connie's a little camera shy and she's old, this big bitch. I can't recall her name, but just to, she's about 50 years old and everything in her body is fake. She looks like the sexy Gremlin from Gremlins 2 you know that had the lipstick and everything. She's big fake titties big fake lips and she's constantly getting procedures done on camera whilst talking about chimps. She's getting her eyes done getting her lips injected and shit. She's like they call me the Dolly Parton of chimps. Some people do. Some people call me that nobody nobody has ever called you the dolly partner chimps

So she steps in to help Connie get their place straightened up for PETA and cheap all she does is paint everything pink She's she's so disgustingly pink and everything she has with these fake wigs and shit So long story short they don't that's her that's the crate That's the best photo of her that will ever be taken by the way You can't imagine how much that's been doctored to make her look back Very antiquated hair. It's that's a wig. She's got lots of those wigs It's a different wig every scene and they look like if it were real hair It would she would be a hair model, you know, I mean like it's so over-the-top ridiculous that it's like you're in the woods

You're shuffling. Hey, you're shuffling. Hey with 18 inches of like hair coming down the back of your anyway This lady steps in and to protect Connie She's like sign the monkeys over to me and then the lawsuit Will be fucked up because they're suing you because you technically own them all of a sudden I'll own them. It'll bug her up Pete as and Peter's like we'll just tack your name on bitch don't you know how the law works and so they do take them to court is like your monkeys are ours this is the end you didn't take care of your monkeys your monkeys are going to monkey paradise and they show a place of heaven paradise dude I want to go all

right this I thought like they were colloquially colloquially saying they're gonna kill the monkeys no they don't do that They love monkeys monkeys are treasures. So they send them to like monkey paradise, which is genuinely they showed a picture of a video of it and There were multiple islands that were green lush Grass and the distance between each island was just a hop and a jump and so they had a draw Rope bridge between each island. Imagine a dozen of them all interconnected. And the monkeys are like swinging around and

running around in groups. And it looked like heaven to monkeys who'd always lived behind bars in a genuine prison. Where are these islands? It's Florida. It looked like it was some kind of a monkey preserve that they've like created down there for this for because monkey, they can't go back to the wild. This is for rescued monkeys to Live out there because again, they live 70 80 years with medical attention So she's like, alright, so they come and they take they have seven chimpanzees come to get the chimpanzees Tonka's missing. Oh

Tonka's not there. He's trying to eat Tonka for herself. So they say, where the fuck is Tonka? And they're like Tonka died. We met, what did he die of? Ah, just not do sick, got sick and died. And she's like, here's his ashes, by the way. And it's like those perfect ashes you get back from a crematorium that have been processed. And they're like, how these are Tonka's ashes? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where did you where did you do this in our backyard?

You made these ashes of a chimpanzee in your backyard. Yeah, here's a sworn affidavit from my husband saying he did No one believes this they have them in court They have the crazy chimp lady in court and the documentary crew of course is behind the scenes so they know the truth I'm not gonna spoil anything because it's I mean, it's a developing story for me as well I'm only on episode 3 there are only three episodes This the first each episode is much like Tiger King ending in this cliffhanger where you go what? What? Like a hard-nosed detective character who's like investigating.

There I suppose he'd be the she calls him Pee Wee Herman. He's the Peta lawyer. He kind of he looks a little he's a little he's a little guy in a gray suit. So she calls him Herman. But he's no nonsense. He's like the things she said about me were so inconsequential. I don't even remember what they were We're here chimps. You're hiding chimps under your floorboards. Are you not? So occasionally Taylor they will cut to I won't say a side story but more of a supporting stories like oh and just so you know

The chimp that ate that woman's face that time also his name was Travis. Yes where he came from Connie chimp crazy Yeah, the the chimp that went to your birthday party. Guess where he came from Chimp crazy. Yeah, chimp crazy that it's they had to change their name after a chimp grabbed a toddler. It didn't hurt it or anything, but it like lunged and like grabbed its little footed like a PJ. He grabbed his leg. I just grabbed his like foot. I don't want foot was a hard word. It is a tricky one. People don't know. What's the bottom appendage? Fuck. They became a nonprofit. They rebranded and they stopped doing the birthday parties But apparently your dad must have plopped down like how many what was the what was the monkey?

How many monkeys how many other animals showed on who it was there were no animals other than the two monkeys the two chimps Do you remember they were girls or guys? There's one girl one boy one's name was Kimmy the girl and one's name was Kirby I think that I think that was five or $6,000. That's wild because the rest of the birthday wasn't that great. I, you know, where the money went, the money went to the chimps. And I say that because I think at one point they showed on screen, like a menu, I'll call it, um, and it was like female champ, 2,500 male champ, 3,000. And they had like some other shit they could bring to because

petting zoo type stuff Are these like the 1993 price? Yeah. Yeah, because they because they've been To purchase a chip. Yes, if you want to go buy a baby Chimpanzee not some spider monkey not one of them little eyes a program and pansy. I bet I bet $10,000 All right. We're gonna use like modern-day prices two thousands. Yeah All right, we're going to use like modern day prices, 2000s. Yeah, $65,000 for a chimpanzee. Because once you have one, you have an actor who sought after by like, maybe you'll go to Hollywood, but every car dealership and like opening of a business would love to have

Tommy the champ come by and wear their shirt and swing around or something like they immediately become little businessmen. But then once they get big enough because they're territorial, and because you know that a lot of factors if they don't give them enough outside time, they genuinely just go crazy like we do the same way a person goes insane and solitary confinement. Those monkeys go crazy and they fuck people up and they told the story of the lady in Florida who got her face eaten off eyes nose jaw brains exposed And then they told another story of a lady

Similar situation keeping a chimpanzee in her house like a son and one day it got her daughter It got her daughter and like they have it's all women who are the victims guys can fuck up a chimp. I Yeah, well I did I got bullied by Kimmy she was a bitch they had no now looking back it makes sense they had no business letting Kirby was a gentle joy wouldn't have been more gentle and kind Kimmy and also like thinking about it again like there was a short period during the birthday where they like had the monkeys do a couple things for us like the trainer up there wearing his fucking Steve Irwin shorts. What he looked like? White guy with a vest and shorts on. Was big guy? No like normal size normal weight guy. Bald? I don't remember. I only

asked like 30 years ago. I only ask I don't want to interrupt your story because I want to interject this her husband Connie's husband The like is partial part-time monkey right Wrangler or something. I Noticed his nose didn't look right like I have an idea why one of the They show him and I told my girlfriend I was like look at that look at homies nose I was like you think as a car accident. She's like he's a chimp wrangler. I think something horrific happened Next time I talked to my dad I'll get more details on it because my memory is there were two people there That brought the monkeys. I was honestly I was much more fixated on the monkeys than the course the pamblers like after

After the monkey is that nose find is find him after they got his nose because what happened was a monkey jump He walked in the enclosure then the lady tells the story Well jim walked into to billy's cage and you know billy Hopped down and well, he just bit his nose right off his face He bit he bit his nose right off his face and spat it on the ground and Connie had to go in the cage and find the nose And you know, they put it on as best they could but it's you know, you've seen it Got your nose is a whole new twist Party back in 1993 kids a little older than me

that is that is like, I remember this. I remember them wearing little shorts and like being dressed up a little bit now. This is, I can't believe I had a birthday with these fucking chimps at it. But I just, I don't know. Because they live so long. Did your dad have a chimp guy?

The chimps that went to your party are in this show. Like, like a hundred percent Someone told me that Kirby was mentioned That a chimp named Kirby was mentioned Specifically remember Kimmy you will see Kirby get rescued and go to like flora You'll see like like but chimps that went to your party are in this show because there's only seven of them And and her place honestly kind of nice like she's got a big Um, and, uh, and her place, honestly, kind of nice, like she's got a big open area from the swing around.

And I hope Kirby is living it up right now on an Island, having a wonderful time. And I hope that I hope Kimmy was torn apart by the rest of the chimps that bit. I, what I also remember is I've, I've told the part before about Kimmy pushed me off the Kawasaki and then got on my Kawasaki and rode it away. Not cool. Disrespectful. I was a birthday boy and you shouldn't be doing that. There was way too much of a free play style that the handlers allowed to happen.

I remember after a bit the handlers just getting up and talking to the adults and eating cake or probably not drinking. There, probably was an alcohol there It was a you know, two three year olds birthday party But yeah, they really shouldn't have let the monkeys just tool around and play with all the kids borderline unattended I'm surprised they didn't shit in the house that I recall No, they're where doctors under those shorts. Yeah Okay. Yeah, see this is stuff stuff I didn't know at the time. And now I love it.

Let me raise this from the chat. It came from, I guess, the subreddit. So a few nights ago, me and my girlfriend found Chimp Crazy and we started watching it. I ended up mentioning the podcast I listened to and one of the hosts was thrown off a Suzuki, four-wheeler by a chimpanzee at his third birthday party that his parents had rented him.

Some grammatical errors here. I showed her one of the clips and we both got a good laugh. Now, if I remember the chimps names were Timmy and Kirby. I shit you not that Kirby is mentioned in this documentary series. Someone needs to forward this info. There you go. Yeah, they did. There's Kimmy and Kirby, but...

Yeah, it was Kawasaki, not a Suzuki, but... That's what it felt like. That's what it felt like. Like when you're like when the heuristic through which you operate as a three-year-old is like, I am the birthday boy. I can do what I want. There are monkeys here for me. And then you get actively bullied by one of the monkeys while your grandma laughs. It's like, whoa, what's going on here? I don't outrank this little beast. And I didn't. If I would have had my druthers, I would have

sent Kimmy home. I would have put her in a fucking cage in the back of the car. You should have played it like a naked in Rust where you make it your life's mission to get back at Kirby. No, Kirby's a famous scholar. It was Kimmy. Oh, my mistake. I fucked it. Fist shaking to the sky. As the series goes on,

if there is a real troublesome monkey that causes issues and hurt a kid, they're gonna bring up the name Kimmy, 100%. Well, it's male chimps, it seems, that do the killing and the violence because there's three examples in the show and that, you know, that they go to these side stories and tell you about this other lady who had a champ who attacked her. And you get a lot of backstory and they interview relatives and friends. It's, it's a really good documentary.

Uh, and, and they do such a good job of making, we watched till three in the morning and we had shit to do. We had to do at 10 AM.m. the next day. And I was like, do you want to finish this? And she's like, how can we not? Because the second episode ended at 2 a.m. for us and we were just going to watch one. And then at 2 a.m. I'm like, did they just show that? We have to go to 3. We have to go to 3. I can't recommend it enough. Chimp crazy.

It's there's when they cover the part about the lady getting her face eaten It's very sad and it's very upsetting there and there is some sad shit. I will say like it like I'm sure I won't Treating them too. Nice. They weren't being awful to them Especially not Connie's place. They were somewhat neglectful. I would say I mean, it's not it didn't look that bad to me, especially what I saw. I didn't it didn't look that bad. It didn't look great, but it wasn't abuse. I didn't think but then the other lady who just had one champ and was just keeping them locked up with a shot-caller on it and like, you know, that was abuse. There was there were some examples. It was

like these people are awful. And then when the monkey goes crazy, the cop was a cop had to kill one of these monkeys. And he's telling the story. And he's like, he started shaking my police cruiser. And then he opened the door of my police cruiser and started to attack me. And that's when I shot him. He's like, and I swear to God, nobody will believe me. But we had a moment where we connected. He said, do it. He's like he want he was in pain and he wanted to die. He knew and I have a monkey did suicide by cop. That's that's what the cop says. And dude, these monkeys are so smart. Like, you know, better than most smart but they'll be like, she's having it clean its own enclosure with a rag.

And he's on the inside cleaning the glass. He's like, you missed a spot. He's getting that. And then she's giving them happy meals. And they don't just rip into it like a dog would if you gave it a boxed happy meal. They're dipping their nuggets in the sauce, bro. They're so cool.

They're dipping their nuggets. And she hands them a power aid in the sauce bro. They're so cool. They're dipping their nuggets. They're dipping and she hands him a powerade in the bottle. Bitch takes the damn cap off and starts sipping it and not spilling. Like he's like, he's got those weird lips that like come out like a little bowl, like prehensile lips. And they're like, they're sipping these power aids and they love them. When she breaks out the power aids, everybody's like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,

oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh As long as the new system is they use the monkeys for you know car dealership commercials and then at the age of six or whatever they actually go to live on an island and it's not like flushing a fish down the toilet or like a dog going to a farm they're actually on an island I'm okay with it. And when I say island it's a big like they have islands within their it's hard to explain.

How can you not be okay with Paradise Island and why isn't there one for washed up YouTubers? Yeah, the fucking politicians get little St. James. The monkeys get something else. There's nothing for the middle, the people in the middle. The bottom one percent and the top one. Nobody else gets islands. Yeah, that's really cool. I'm gonna watch that, see if it brings back some memories.

I can't, dude, seeing that picture of the little pink shorts, now I remember the little blue shorts that Kirby was wearing. Like, that's so weird. So weird. The personalities of the people involved, it reminds me so much of Tiger King, where you've got these crazy outlandish, it's almost like they see these animals as an accessory to their weirdness you know it's mostly women it seems with the chimps it's definitely mostly women um and they sort of explain that they don't spend a lot of time on it but i guess women who have this i don't know what the disorder or or the deal would be but they like being the mother they have this really strong maternal instinct with everything And they want these what they want a little baby. That's a baby forever

You know, I mean they want they want this that they're attracted to the chimp because it will always need her It will always need her there It will always and and maybe they can't get that from people or adults or maybe their own children grew up and went away But here's a child who never grows old You know, he'll always need bottles and I cannot relate to that the best part about kids when they start taking care of themselves Or hit it back that's actually I don't mean to make like it's all bad When when the kid actually has like an interesting thought that he could bring back to you they get better Yeah, yeah, so can't recommend that enough. Um

The only thing I would say is when they describe that lady's attack It's gruesome and it's upsetting and uh, and some of the monkey stuff is is sad I I almost cried a couple times just feeling bad for the monkeys and feeling bad for just the whole scenario You know because it's it's nobody's fault. Sometimes like the monkey, you know, because it's nobody's fault sometimes. Like the monkey did something awful, but it's like, what do you expect? And like the people who got wounded, you're like, I mean, she loved the monkey.

Like she didn't know any better. So it's just a rotten situation, but those monkeys are so much smarter than I thought they were. I knew that there were like outlier monkeys maybe, like just like those dogs you see that are like, Oh my God, how many commands does he know? But it seems like all those monkeys are just, yeah, the smart animals. They're like seven year olds.

I would say they're like seven year old kids or something like that. Like, like when you tell they genuinely do, they don't speak, but that monkey did this. He went more food, more food. And she's like, you want more food, more food and she's like you want more food more food yes like all right all right let me get it together it's like he's signing he's telling her exactly what he wants yes like that was it's really cool it's really any any footage of the old birthday parties yeah because I mean, it probably was, was there ever one with a pool? That would not have been ours.

Oh no. I thought you always had one. No. Uh, but I would, oh man, I need to look through a lot of those old like storage tubs and things that I got from my mom's basement and see if there's like footage of my monkey birthday party. That would, it would be like some old, like big shoulder cam footage. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm excited. Love it with Taylor Briggs props. Yeah. We're gonna be better than the phrenology book. If I could find a picture of me with Kimmy or Kirby, I would love that. Like I, it might have been destroyed in the flood, like when I was like

a teenager, but if not, it's probably here. Yeah. The flood that also destroyed a lot of my fucking magic cards. Well, flood that also destroyed a lot of my fucking magic cards well they were taking up a lot of space i thought you were going to say something fake like yeah that's where all my firearms went no i'm being real it destroyed my magic cards i wasn't i wasn't pleased every couple years my tax documents get lost to the flood the way it happened is my my youngest brother i was off at college at this time and so my brother would have been like 12 or so and he had a friend over and I guess they were out in the woods or something playing and his friend came in to shit and use the toilet

in the downstairs bathroom. And you know how some kids seemingly like, I remember when I was a kid, I would occasionally clog the toilet because I was using amounts of toilet paper that are just a baffling amount per wipe just like packing it all in there and then overflow in the toilet because there's too much toilet paper in there and this kid did that and instead of like like if I I was gonna say if When I have flooded other people's I've immediately made it known, you know, hey, we got to handle

this. I wouldn't have if I could have hit that. Actually, you know, I'm actually seeing my little brother's friends point now. But he overflowed the toilet and caused so much damage. It was a ranch style house. And so a lot of it is the basement. Like it was a finished basement. My bedroom was in the basement. My brother's bedroom is in the basement. And it was it got so high cause no one else was home. It flooded and destroyed the entire basement floor and like six inches up of drywall everywhere. There was stuff like floating in the overflow storage area. It was,

it was horrible. And so yeah, that kid caused a huge amount of damage, wrecked my magic cards. How did that happen? Like it in my mind, he flushed it 720 times to get six inches like no just once and it keeps overflowing. He just he flushed it and as it was like overflowing and continued overflow he just went back outside. He didn't tell anyone. He just let it overflow. That's not what happens whenever I've had like a clogged toilet the top drains to the bottom the bottom doesn't drain into the plumbing

If you flush it one more time, sometimes you can get away with it, but twice and you're definitely fucked. I Don't think that he ever had that It caused that much damage because I didn't have flooring in my bedroom for a while like I didn't like there was just It was just something something must have happened with the with the apparatus back there to let it flow. Yeah. That caused some some stress between my parents and that kid's parents for a while. Where it was like you'd come over and he caused like fifteen thousand dollars worth of damage through flooding.

And they're like oops. That sounds like a you problem I would sue I would probably file a civil suit over. You know what? I just call the insurance company Oh, you have homeowners insurance, but you deductible one grand 2500. Well, sure Yeah, it just took forever to fix and that was the pain in the ass plus the the lost memories of magic cards I wasn't as upset about the memories at the time. Just I watched a I happen to catch on YouTube shorts They do this thing with magic cards, you know They've got the old unopened packs from the 90s and stuff and there's always a chance that there's something in there worth I don't know hundred thousand dollars or something crazy. And so they sell those unopened packs for like

$300. Yeah, but what they do is they sell those unopened packs for like $300. Yeah, but what they do is they weigh them and they'll be like this is a heavy one. It's 21.2 grams not not 20.9 grams those extra three grams or whatever that means a foil. That means there's a definite foil in there maybe two if it's a if it's a kumikawa foil and those are a little lighter and it's like so people will pay for it And then and then they do the slow Card by card i'd want to smear them all out on the table real quick and see what I got But they're like it's a youtube short and they're monetizing this shit So they go card by card and and I don't even know what the cards mean, but i'm like big money big money

Dude those some of those are worth absurd amounts of money. Like literally over a hundred grand, a couple of them. The black Lotus, right? Yeah, that's the most valuable. And I think I know one thing about magic. I don't, I don't, I don't have the first idea how to play. If you would have put cards in front of me, I, I don't know, but I know the black Lotus is worth six digits. That's like the only part of magic that like is even vaguely in the mainstream of

people's knowledge. If you feel like you bring it up, they're like, isn't there some black lotus card that some 150 grand? It's like, yep, that's my hobby. Does it make you auto win? Like, why is there so much value in this card? It's cause it costs zero and it gives you three mana to spend right away Which is basically like and you can only add one mana to your mana pool every turn to keep it simple And so it's basically if I get one on on turn one and I'm playing you before you've even gotten a chance to put a card Down I can potentially use like a turn four amount of mana

It's one of those cards that like in an early strategy game They're like this seems like a fun idea, but they didn't think it through. And so as soon as it goes out to the player base, everyone's like, oh, well, this is beyond broken. Like, let's just keep using this then. And over time, it became more rare because everyone included it. And now it's like, I have a friend who has one, spent so much money on it. And now just like, he does very, very well for himself, obviously.

He's not someone that like put his whole life into magic cards, but there's nine magic cards that altogether are worth like $200,000 and he bought all, I think he has like seven or eight of them now. He just wants them. So he didn't buy them like 30 years ago back when they were affordable. No, he's my age. And so like he bought him like over the course of the last 15 years or so Yeah, that's pretty cool. I remember seeing one of the Paul brothers come out. I think it was Logan with that holographic Japanese Charizard he's wearing it round like a pendant instead of wearing like some bling

He's got a quarter million dollar pokey card and a necklace and I was like that's That's the line. That's what he that's the tone You should strike every time you open your mouth and go in front of a camera that like cool nerd like cool rich pimp nerd kind of thing like like see like hit all those cultural points at once but but Instead he threw his dog into the front of a boat and it almost got eaten by the propellers the other day. I was

I saw that and I watched it a couple of times trying to prove to myself. It wasn't into yeah. Yeah. Cuz I don't I don't hate the Paul brothers reflexively. I haven't seen a lot of their content but I like fighters by default and but no man he I mean I saw the foot push the dog off the boat there's

there's no way not to see it like that it was a pontoon boat I don't know what kind of dog it was but I'll say it weighed like 12 pounds maybe and uh he used his foot to sort of scoot it off the bow of the boat while the boat was underway so of course he narrowly missed to the prop as the boat ran it over and It was nothing cool about it. I don't know He risked his dog's life for a quick little internet clip that that didn't mean anything in the in the grand scheme of things Is it current? Like I know I saw it recently, but I didn't know if it like came from nine years ago Nah, we just seen that shit by now. There's enough people that hate him.

I didn't mind the Japanese suicide forest bit because to me, it's like, fuck. I mean, I'm in a Japanese suicide forest. If you all have one of those here, that's kind of on y'all, not me. Like, I mean, I would I wouldn't have felt bad about filming that at all because it seemed to me like their thing, their problem. Oh, was I not supposed to film your suicide force? I didn't know. We film in ours back home. I think it was like a more acceptable thing to have. I think it was more like tone that people were mad about at the time. Like the silly hat. Not that I don't care or not that I like invested in it. But like if David

Attenborough had showed up and been like, like talking about the forest itself and the spookiness and all that in kind of solemn tones. People will be like, oh, this is just a documentary. How interesting. But he went in there with one of those green toy from Toy Story out of the claw machine hats on, and he's soy facing like, oh like with a dead body behind him. And it's like, all right, this is pretty tasteless. Not a lot of reverence in that. Oh, I want to read his reply. Like, can you imagine if I go to like,

if I like took a vacation to Germany and I like stop into Auschwitz and I'm like soy facing around, oh. It's not a good look. Wearing a fucking, you know, a South Park hat. Before the dog thing goes too far in the distance and Logan Paul says I would never ever ever push Broly off the boat He jumped and a hand was behind him petting him when he jumped we attempted to grab him foot for a fact We did not push him to my eyes

Here it is on the screen to my eyes. He pushed him with his foot like that's how I saw it I need to see the clip again and be sure i'm right, but I Kept rewatching it not wanting to see what I saw Yeah, I don't know it looked like he pushed him in there to me I hope not I don't know, you know I said four years ago. So this is old very old Yeah, it turns out it was 2020. I didn't know. Okay. Well, I thought it was new too. Yeah, I hope not. It's new to me Yeah, shouldn't you didn't push? Yeah, I don't I don't hate those guys either I like like I just didn't mind the Japanese

I didn't care I didn't care about the Japanese for and then I met the guy that time and he was like nice to me and Like like that oftentimes that trumps my opinions of a lot of people like when I met down bulls area and it was like Damn was nice to me Dan me and Dan and his girlfriend got one of his fancy ass cars and drove around Vegas and had a good time. And like, like I thought is he was an interesting person. I remember him talking about root. He's like, yeah, I'm going to ruin this car.

I don't care. Let's drive it in the desert. It's like a $200,000 Mercedes or some shit. They were going to take it out in the desert, just to ruin it. Driving out in the desert, fucking around. He's like, that doesn't matter. Who cares? Let's do it.

Let's fucking do it. And his girlfriend's just like, no, that's so much money. This and that's like nah and i will monetize it'll pay for itself it'll be fun and then like just just him kind of he was i don't know behind scenes he was nice to me whenever people are nice to me it means a little more than what i read on the internet yeah of course right right yeah i get how that happens i I get how that happens. It is hard to look at, I wouldn't want him as a business partner. It kind of looks like he took money from everyone around him and used it to fund his lifestyle.

Yeah, I don't know about his finances. I just remember he would do those things where he would find a way to make money while getting pussy. Like he would do those things where he would find a way to make money while getting pussy like he would he would do those Bikini calendars and he'd hire he wouldn't hire he'd make it a contest. So all these women want to be in his bikini Calendar that he's gonna sell So he doesn't have to pay for the models and he's clearly fucking the models while making the calendar and then selling it and then

monetizing the process of the whole thing with videos the whole time through. So it's just money and pussy coming and going. It just, it was admirable. Kind of amazing. I'm not sure where his money came from though, right? Like he obviously took it from his investors and used it to fund his lifestyle, leased a home

and bought cars that he trashed and stuff like that. And now all the money's gone. So I just, I just like, oh. Is oh, it's one of those things where it's sometimes it's hard to tell like what's real or not, because I see him gambling. Like I see him at poker tournaments and not just tournaments, but cash games. And he's kind of a minor celebrity there too. And you know, he throws a lot of money around not not like uber amounts, but way more than somebody who's living on somebody else's

money should but maybe it's all bullshit i often wonder um drake i think gets paid by dake or whatever that gambling um yeah the one dirty website is yeah so he'll he'll tweet oh just put a quarter mil on rondo rousey to to do the comeback and take on a man in nunez and everybody be like don't don't don't bet on me Please don't bet on me because he's got a bad record as he loses so much But either yeah, that's clearly like a credit from stake to drive attention I wonder though what the deal is what I would want the deal to be is like all right You pay me a hundred thousand for the tweet and then you give me a hundred thousand to bet with

You know, I mean like like like well, no, we're gonna pay you the hundred twenty five like normal no no no no Hunter this is much better than both of us trust me and so he'll place these outrageous bets on on sports stuff and I wonder if any of its real he's really the gambling sites are gonna be like we could give you a hundred grand in cash and a hundred to bet but how about we just give you 350 to bet? Wouldn't that be more fun for everyone? And then someone sponsored by gambling companies like, huh, I guess it would be

the fucking marketing manager. She's going back to his boss and he's like, I got him again. Got Drake again. It's so hard to get gambling addicts to gamble. Dude, it is. I see the pull. I see how interesting it is and I'm secondhand but imagine winning. Imagine making $1000 that easily. Like it must be enticing. Yeah but the other side of it. Imagine losing $1000 that easily. Like I would be I'd be just beating myself up.

Like days like you idiot. Like what were you doing playing Plinko for real money online? You just got to put that out of your mind. I remember we went to that casino and like I lost a thousand and like an hour or something. It was like, God damn it. What? What is this? I want to go home. Man, this is why all the chandeliers here are so nice. Yeah, yeah, you figure out right away.

Yeah, the house usually wins. Although, you know, we watched Dirty the other day and he was on quite a run, hitting those numbers straight up on roulette. Oh yeah, over the long game, that's a winning proposition. Yeah, always bet on 21. Is that a roulette thing people do? No, I think Kyle came up with that number and he did And he's still salty about it

He's like give me some numbers to bet on I gave him like four numbers and they fucking hit and he didn't bet on My numbers. Yeah, you want my opinion now the next round now. I'm keeping to myself This magic in 21 under tight wraps now. Yeah. I like sports betting, but I like betting on fights. I like betting on fights because they're so chaotic. And most of the time, even the underdogs got a chance, like maybe 30% chance, maybe even as low as a 20. You know, there's some where it's like, I remember you and Dirty were betting one night and Dirty wants to bet. So he's like you pick the fighter. I don't care. You pick the fighter. I don't care. And what he's like, okay, I'll pick the champion who's never lost.

And you're picking that's so that is not how it went. Like first, it was the Patty Pemblit fight where I think I did have. Oh, that those odds were really close. The next one, I picked the underdog or something. The next one, like I wanted the underdog because he wanted these odds and he wouldn't give it to me. I was like fine. They'd be like, I'll take the side that you want and he went for that. He lost everyone. What do you want? Every one of them. It was actually me who did that to him. I remember we're watching an Amanda Nunez fight and he's like, who do you want? I'm like, Nunez, who do you want? I'll

take that other white girl who looks 17. Cool, cool, cool. We're watching the fight and people are like, you guys have money on this? I'm like, yeah, dirty bet on that white girl. Meanwhile, Amanda Nunez, I don't know if she's ever lost a **** fight. Maybe she did in her career. She lost one or two. No, no, she lost her belt and won it back. I forget. Remember that woman? She uh she won her belt. They wanted to like instantly give her Nunez and she's like, listen, I don't think I'm old. I don't know how many fights I have in me. I'll fight anyone. You're real Brock Lesnar in here. Just pay me.

And you see one in her to defend her belt on the cheap and I remember her name. I just remember the story. Yeah, I don't either. I but but yeah, I enjoy gambling. They're doing a what do you call fantasy football in there now in our in our in the hangout. Yeah, I've never done that before.

I haven't either. I don't know enough about football players to do it. You can auto draft, but then what's the point? Yeah, that's yeah I did it and I found that it's a tremendous amount of work to like Put together your team every week and so i'm like bringing up the the tail in this league I've got injured players in my starting lineup I don't think this is for me. Yeah, I feel like I would, I'd just be Googling as it happened. Oh, I take, here's a good example. I was looking for a quarterback and I was going to say John Elway.

I was a little kid when he was good. I remember him being a big deal in like 90s sports movies The Chiefs! Mahomes obviously. Yeah, just pick the Chiefs. That's what I would do. If I were to name my top five current quarterbacks, dude, fucking Mahomes five times. I have a call. This is based in-

I don't know any other ones. Bullshit. But I bet Travis Kelce falls off and people get mad at Taylor Swift. That's what I think have you see that He's getting old for the NFL. So he's due for a drop-off, right? His brother is right. No his brother Even Travis is in his 30s, right? Yeah, I'm pretty sure did you see the leaked the supposed leaked document from the PR firm? That he was gonna break up with her at the end of either August or September. Does that sound right? Yeah, it was planning how the breakup is going to go

because for a long time the conspiracy theories theorists have Said that the whole relationship is a sham assembled by you know NFL PR and Taylor Swift PR to do a part this Multi-billion dollar partnership by like pretending to date this guy and have this This romance and maybe it is maybe it is if that document is is has any reality to it. That's a bad look Hi Who knows if it's real? Yeah, I just assumed it was bullshit, but maybe I'm wish casting. I don't know. Who knows if it's real. Yeah. I just assumed it

was bullshit but maybe I'm wish casting. I don't know because the I don't know what to make of that. Yeah. I can't read it. That's for sure. Yeah. The thing that has had my attention today is the tenant stuff. Have you followed that at

all? Yes. Yes. Why didn't we get in on that that Russian peak? Why would I suckle those commie money right off the bone? It would be raw if we. All right. So Tenet is a publishing company, I guess you call it. And they own a couple of podcasts. And also the people that work for them include Tim Pull, Laura Southern, Dave Rubin. And there's two more. I can't remember very well. But these like influential right-wing podcasters and

They were basically being paid to parrot rushing talking points The money was outrageous temple was getting a hundred thousand dollars an episode according to the really according to the indictment by the Department of Justice Yeah, so It's a ton. Yeah Yeah, and they're like I didn't know Russia was behind it. Meanwhile, like when they're getting slow replies, they email like, what time is it in Moscow? They have their Google search history. Even if like, like, like even giving all like the most leeway, like, let's say all of us

started getting paid mysteriously 200 grand each an episode. Like, do you think we'd be like, man, what a great new sponsor. And all we have to do is agree with these weird political talk. Like all we have to do is say that Ukraine is America's number one enemy. A point that Tim pool was making. Did you see that video? Kind of? I've seen the video, but I don't, but I think linking the two together is, is, is hard because they're getting paid by those people

But Tim pulls position is I'm the victim here I didn't know who these people there's a shadow organization behind the the business that's been paying us. We didn't know what is what is he saying? His what I just said he was okay Saving he didn't know where the money came from that and that there was no script that they were just being paid by this company He's like no one told me to say these thoughts The indictment because they like Russia would say hey, you know, which of your guys in the lineup is willing to say this and they're like I forget if they called it Tim pool if it was like commentator number three

I forget how it went but they're like, yep We got a guy on board who will parrot these Russian talking points for the money. Well, but but without using the word Russian, you know, like like like I I don't I wouldn't be curious though about where the money's coming. So, he's saying that they didn't know where the money the money's coming from. That's me to say Ukraine is America's number one enemy. I mean, it could there's a long list of

people who want me to tell my listeners that Russia's our friend and Ukraine is our enemy. I don't know. What is his his like actual position is like, I just said it like he likes he thinks Russia should be our friend or like what is in his tweet today? He said he didn't say that. He said I'm we're victims here. We didn't know who this company was and who was paying this this money These are our these are just how we feel these are our takes on the issues at hand by the way Fuck Putin. He can suck balls or whatever the you know, I like take You might say something like that once a federal indictment gets leaked or whatever the fuck it from the Justice Department

Whatever that thing was. I don't know who's I think it's somewhere in the middle I'm not sure if Tim Poole is part of some I know he's part of some uh Russian meddling plot but I don't know how culpable he is in it he could if someone I need to see I need to see the Russian person or the company's letter to Tim Poole saying say this and that I need to know what they told him to say if anything because without that I Don't see anything I'm like more critical when I see what I think amounts to like foreign interference in American politics like so if Like he should come on like like he didn't know

What he was being paid for like that just doesn't seem believable. It's the same way like you see a politician and it's like, why is this dude from fucking Oregon, a hardcore, like pro-Israel guy? And then you're like, oh, I wonder why, because he's taking money from APAC. Like, I don't think you need like an edge or one chicken in the egg or five thing to connect every little detail. I think you can just look and be like, all right, what is this person's talking points and who are they receiving money from? And if they line up, then it kind of gels. It makes sense. See, I think sometimes it can be chicken in the egg though. You say, why is this this politician getting this money from AIPAC? Oh, okay, that because he does this and that. I think it's the other way around

maybe. Maybe AIPAC is giving him money because he's one of of their because like, hey, this guy believes in us. This guy supports things that we believe in. Oh, but wait, let me jump comes out in drag. Let me jump in with politics. Kyle's point could hold water, right? Like, hey, Taylor always votes the way we like him to let's fund Taylor's campaign and make sure he continues to vote the way like he continues winning because we like what this guy stands for. But when you're talking about a podcaster if he's already saying what you want them what they what you'd like him to why are you

paying him why would they give him a hundred thousand dollars an episode four episodes a week a hundred thousand dollars an episode to say what he's already saying yeah it looks bad I need because it's useful by the people. It looks bad. I need to see the script if there is one. I need to see, and surely they have it. Like if they've done this, what I need to see to understand the whole thing is

what do they, Tim, they don't just send them a check and say, have a good day. They send them a check and say, we'd like you to talk about these points or we'd like you to give your thoughts on this situation. Or we want you to say bullet points. We want you to say this Ukraine, enemy of the United States. We want you to say this Russia, a conservative Christian, you know, place with, you know,

with ideals that most Americans find appealing. Putin strong, you know bold Leader and then you know, maybe some like america did this that some some what aboutism look at look at all these times america Step their foot in somebody else's pond If there's a script like that, it's like, oh you're a propagandist You might be an enemy of our country, sir Like I need to see that part. That's so important to knowing if anybody's wrong. But why, like, I don't feel like you even need to see it for a lot of these propagandists.

Like, I just extend it further than Tim Pool. Like, I think these politicians who take money from foreign lobbies are propagandizing on behalf of those foreign lobbies. When I see Tim Pool, if he's doing this, and he's saying a bunch of pro-Russian talking points, and he's getting money from a Russia adjacent organization, and he's just seemingly like, Oh, suddenly I make $400,000 more a week for saying these things. Like 1.2 million. He is 1.6 million. Oh, yeah, that is that is the propagandist. Like that's propaganda. Like, yeah, like you I don't, you can just look at the propaganda there and who's funding them, and then dictate, Oh, why is this person, you you, I don't, you can just look at the propaganda and who's funding them and then dictate, oh, why is this person, you know, so, uh, worried about Israel or

Ukraine or some foreign country? Oh, it's cause they're taking money from lobbyist organizations that promote that. Yeah. It's exactly what I'm them. A lot of goodwill to be like, uh, Russia's paying them to do these talking points, but they do it for free. That is extraordinary amount of like

You give Tim Poole some credit when it's probably not deserved. Yeah, a lot of these people are just lying propagandists I wouldn't just say that all I need is I need to see what the contract looks like or what the proposals look like Before I see that I wouldn't want to I'd'd like to see that. That's a high level of proof but I in court, I like it. You know, if we're talking about court, not public opinion. Yeah, I wanna know what other information they have. Yeah, I mean, we've got way more. It's just like the doctor just respect thing like, man, I really would like to see those text messages because then I could,

you never know when someone else is being too prudish, not in the doctor's respect thing, by the way, not necessarily, but sometimes people are like, oh, can you leave these foul text messages? And it's like, oh, that's not so bad. What are you talking about? We're gonna ruin him over this? I just wanna see it. I feel so much more comfortable standing in judgment

of someone if I saw the actual meat and potatoes of what they were being told to do or even understood how it worked. Like I don't know if his company's being paid and the money is for many things like like like like maybe there's a I admit to you there's a hole there there's a in this quid pro quo it's like wait a minute they gave him the money then he said the pro-russian stuff it seems pretty open and shut case but I don't know enough about his show or what here's They gave him the money then he said the pro-russian stuff. It seems pretty Open and shut case But I don't know enough about his show or what here's company or what they do there or what they talk about to know if The money could be explained away some some other way some other sponsorship thing

But it looks bad and it's crazy that it's on such a big stage right before the election did any kind of time Department for foreign lobbying should not be allowed like really foreign influence in our election needs to get in our politics. We got to shut that down. Here's my question Taylor. I'm not this isn't a gotcha. There's no right or wrong answer as far as I know but I heard destiny say that when someone interferes with elections or like tries to change America's culture For say Russia's benefit is a kinetic response justified destiny says yes, and I I'm like kinetic response He's talking about bombs and missiles and shit. Is it okay to reply? with force

To like I don't know IT crimes. I Don't know. I guess it depends on implications of it. But like, surely if destiny has an opinion that strong about these retards taking money from Russia, then he would have the same opinion about much more powerful foreign foreign lobbying groups on a much larger scale doing it in the US. Right. You think of APEC? Yeah. Yeah. Any sort of influence from from a foreign country like we like that's crazy. We can't allow that. Like, no, it's got to work on behalf of Americans having a whole lobby working on behalf of another

country. That's bananas, dude. That's crazy. That's insane. When you start talking about state actors, like the money's a lot. I mean, like I'll make it up. Like Nokia is only willing to pay so much to influence American politics. But Russia or China, like if you told me China would pay a trillion to choose the president. Maybe. Well, they got it. Maybe not between the two candidates, if they get. Oh, we get Wang.

He's great president for you. OK, Wang is the best. between the two candidates if they get Wang Okay, is the best I love america I'm america wang He got his eyes taped open eating hot dog. I got lost in the big numbers but a billion Yeah, I bet they pay a billion to choose between even the current two like if they could only choose They might pick one or the other for a billion. Yeah, I mean like Like if they could only choose they might pick one or the other for a billion. Yeah

Millionaires drop money like that didn't Zuckerberg put 300 million dollars into Georgia alone for get out the vote in 2020 For the Democrats, I don't know. I don't know I know crazy must pledged 45 million a month for Trump, but then backed out and he was like, nah I got a I got the PR I wanted out of that Real buddy flip-flopped on electric vehicles, so I just get a back out I think he's happy with the electric vehicle flip-flop because it didn't really apply to Tesla's cuz it that the the It was something about the his vehicles are so expensive It wasn't even gonna bother him something about the tax credit being for vehicles under 35 grand or something I Did see him flip-flop like the next two days later. He was at some building and they're like, hey

So you're giving 45 million to Trump a month No No won't be doing that. I don't I don't I don't want to interfere with any elections and he was like walks away with his Tism, you know, he's an odd guy. He's fun to watch on the mic. Sometimes he's so bad that you're like, Oh my god, it must be atrocious to be in a meeting this guy. And then occasionally, it's like, I don't know, he has his coffee or something. He's pretty poignant and he can get his point across well, but it's not all the time. He loves like boomer memes. He's conservative. Like memes that would fit in like 10 years ago.

They would have been outdated 10 years ago. He doesn't have a great sense of humor. His humor isn't very witty, I would say. When I see the stuff he retweets, it's like that's like a six out of ten on the witty scale there That's that's that's a little too on the nose what you're doing there. And then sometimes it would just be flat out wrong It's like man, you're tweeting out something that's like factually wrong You prefer the kind of tweets that I share with you like biden and trump aided into a chinese duet I was high the other night and I must have watched that 10 times.

It's Trump and Biden as they came out on the debate stage, but they've used AI to make their mouths sing some romantic Chinese ballad to one another. And it's like that, it's like old ancient Chinese, like string music playing in the background. I don't know. I don't know how else to describe it. And it's pretty convincing. I thought it was real the first time. It's so realistic when they're, you know, fading like star wiping over the snowy Chinese background. I thought that was real. I thought that was real. I got it.

You got to be careful, man. You didn't know that either of our candidates had those kind of pipes. No, no. I get fooled by CGI. Little man, you didn't know that either of our candidates had those kind of pipes. No, no, I get, I get fooled by CGI. I watch carefully. Biden had too many knuckles. That's how I knew they got to figure that one out. I got to figure that one out. It's no, it's good. They haven't.

That's either. I give them a pass. I think Mickey mouse had it nailed. I think Mickey mouse goes into like the the what do they call it? Public domain public domain at some point pretty soon, right or did they good ten years ago? It was due They changed copyright law so that it doesn't expire Wonder how they got that got that law changed If only there was some way to buy laws. Yeah I saw people that were mad about the new Lord of the Rings show, which if you're mad about

the new Lord of the Rings show, you shouldn't be watching the new Lord of the Rings show. Don't watch that trash. Is it coming out now? I guess it's coming out now. Season 2 dropped. I saw that they've lost almost like a literal majority of their viewership in the beginning of season one and they're trying to make orcs seem like friendly and tragic now. Yeah. Yeah. They're like, oh, this is this family of orcs is just trying to like, family, find a find a better families. They should do it all work episode, but it's a musical where they just sing and dance. It's genius idea. Dude, I bet they're not too far from that based on the response.

I'll see people who are in the Lord of the Rings tweeting about it, and I just want to be like, why are you putting yourself through this, man? Don't watch it. They made the good and evil ambiguous, which Tolkien is not. It's very clear who the good guys are and who the bad guys are. Just like in World War II, it's very clear who the good guys are and who the bad guys are just like in World War two It's very clear who the good guys are one side is Genociding and torturing and the other side is trying to get in there and save their comrades who are occupied like there's good guys And there's bad guys and that that was the time period of Tolkien writing this stuff, right? So

When you make a an orc family and there's like an orc lady and an orc baby and now orcs fuck and make children i guess and they're and they're like oh we're the oh we're not all we're innocent in all this we're just swept up in the greater schemes of kings and lords of and in middle earth it's like no no you're pure evil you're evil incarnate you've been twisted by the by morgoth or or his minions and you used to be elves or men, but now you are twisted beyond repair. Your souls have been so badly scarred that now you are pure evil. That's what you are. That's why you're here. You are literary character written by a fucking pen,

says evil right above your name, circled it, underlined it. I don't know if I can share the screen with an orcist like this. I'm a hardcore orcist, if that's what it is. I don't like them. I don't think they belong in condor. Babies come from some say they just spring out of the ground. I'm literally confused because I remember in the movie the bad guys springing out of the ground. The Eurychidia. Yeah, yeah, they're Eurychidia. The orcs are

different. Yeah, orcs are kind of a seedy history with them Then you don't really know as much about their Like basically the orcs are just evil Kyle's right like there is a a Good and evil that's not ambiguous in the Lord of the Rings world and a lot of the mechanics operate on that And so if you suddenly make it that, oh, these orcs and Mordor, they're not like evil savages looking to conquer the world of men and make it like the time of the orcs and all that. Like, oh no, they're just misunderstood. It's like, well then that casts a negative light on the humans who are trying to fight back against

them. And it's like, no, that's not the way it is. Like the humans, the elves, the dwarves, like these are the forces of good, although they do have problems within them. And Mordor, Sauron, Morgoth, whatever, like that is the force of evil. And you can't upend that without throwing the whole world into a mix that doesn't make sense. It's not congruent anymore with the whole.

I prefer it when my evil's a little good or at least their points make some sense. There's enough of that though. There's so much of that and it's like we don't need any more, oh this guy's bad but he's also kind of cool and clever. It's like yeah in this world the orcs are bad, Sauron's bad, Morgoth does not have redeeming parts to him.'t jump into that. There's enough of that argument There's enough of clear-cut good and evil as well. Mostly exist in children's shows. Oh Okay, but that's fair but all of our media like adult media and is about ambiguous characters now and it has been Yeah, yeah, like like 15 maybe 20 years. I don't know when it started but the antihero Maybe it started in 1999 with Tony fucking soprano, you know, like okay

Like it's not that one structure is Like the winner and ones the loser and like you should always have it be unambiguous or always have it be ambiguous It matters Like what is the structure of the world and what makes sense within the context of that world? And in the Lord of the Rings world, there is an ultimate good and an ultimate evil. Like, that's how it works. Yeah, it's for God and Satan, you know, Morgotha Satan. Yeah, it's an allegory of Christianity, which by the way, fucking George R. R. Martin released

something and he was like, oh, it's just been so stressful and the world is so crazy. I didn't get around to writing it. Tolkien wrote Lord of the Rings during World War II. It was so much more stressful than it is now. The blitz, they were dropping bombs. I fucking hate that fat idiot. Wins of Winter isn't written. Wasted so much of my time. I saw that.

I'm glad someone on the internet pointed out what we just said because Tolkien was getting bombed. I think he probably wrote parts of the trilogy during the blitz when the Germans were overhead. And he probably wrote parts of the trilogy during the Blitz. Yeah. And the Germans were overhead and you could, he probably had to turn his lamp down extra low and draw the shades so that the bombers couldn't target fucking Birmingham or wherever he lived. He's drawn a detailed topographical map of Osgiliath while like the lights are flickering and George R. R. Martin covered in crumbs can't get it done.

Ha ha ha. Covered. One was covered in rubble in the other crumbs? Yeah, and that's why a hundred years from now, Mr. Martin, Lord of the Rings will be a part of the Western pantheon of great epics and Game of Thrones will be that thing that people watched for eight years in the early 2000s. And we're very disappointed with the non-ending. Yes more shows coming out legacy. There's more shows coming out legacy. There's more shows coming out. I didn't know George Martin or Ger Martin whatever his name is

uh was behind Elden right? I guess he's part of that. Yeah I think he helped with some of the lore stuff right? Which is like hey how about you finish your fucking dinner before you start on dessert? All right when I see something like that what I what I would bet is that they wanted to attach his name to their project and maybe he He tinkered a little but you know he did I'm I'm dubious about the uh that occurred to me and I'm also dubious I wish I was more of a subject matter expert like if I had played all three dark souls And could say oh, this is a dramatic departure from what from software typically puts out You can see his fingerprints all over it

Then I but I'm not that guy. I don't know Just like the others. Yeah, first of all, I love boulders gate. I think the story is tremendous You know, it's it really feels like we're also I don't know who makes it. I think that company is It's a smaller medium-sized studio. I can't think of the name right now, but I love that game. I think the story is tremendous. You can play it so many different ways and it feels like you are impactful on the final end of the story. And I like that it's not on rails. Uh, tremendous. So if he had, if he did do something for that fucking kudos to him,

who cares about winds of winter? We're never going to read that shit. Yeah. If it released today, I wouldn't read it. Like I've lost all interest in that. Yeah, I'd end up reading it. I was like, Taylor's an avid reader. I'd be like, yeah, I guess I may as well. Right, right, and if you put a donut in front of me, I wouldn't eat it. Have you read in... I'd eat it.

Have you read in, what is it, Capote book in truth in cold blood or something I have not in cold blood. I don't know. It's a famous book I've been wanting to wanting to read it for a long time It came to me because I was watching a movie last night and the book was in the movie I want to read a classic. I haven't like I don't know. I've never read Moby Dick, but I bet it sucks. Oh, it doesn't. It's good. It's good. It's short. Yeah, you can power through Moby Dick in 3 days. Give me five. I now

that I wear glasses, I so a viewer might think I've worn glasses for like 10 years, but I just wore them for my computer screen and a little less stressful But i've advanced to a stage where I wear glasses If i'm if my head's not on a pillow i'm wearing glasses And it's like I think I would have been a more of a lifelong reader had I been a glasses wearer the whole way through And I don't know like a citizen can't any good. I haven't read that I don't want to read that. I think in cold blood is is is it it's it's about some murders Uh, and then I think capote what is a

I watched the movie about capote. I know he's that squirrely little gay guy who wrote who was a tremendous author I think he invented some words. I think maybe he invented the word patina Really? I think so. We're good for him. I could be wrong I just I heard someone say that um, but I think I'm gonna read that soon I I haven't read anything in a while I usually read usually read sci-fi and sometimes I read oh my god the most embarrassing thing I read is these uh almost almost I read the Star Trek the next generation novels where they they'll like hook up they'll like hang out with the X-Men and shit

There's a big crossovers between other universes and so you got Bacard like dealing with a Marvel character So this is the most embarrassing thing you've ever met You know if you get to see wharf fight Wolverine, that's a pretty fucking good story right there. I should not be a good fight though Yeah, Wolverine has organs wharf loses every fight right well Cliché I know prior to deep space 9 war blues is every fight to establish to the other characters a very tough guy I get it kind of there's a great episode of TNG where he's, he's on his way back from a, uh, tournament, a bat left, like sword fighting tournament. And he's sort of doing his personal lock and he's like, my opponent used an

illegal move, but did not work out for him. I remain champion standing. And you see his big fucking trophy and his trophy is like a sphere with three crooked blades coming out of it. And I was like, I love that about war I love that warf is champion standing at the Klingon bat left tournament on chronos or whatever the fuck um so I I love the I love that part of the show and I'm still kind of sorry that they never made the Captain Warf show because I just want to follow warf around the the galaxy fucking shit up he's by far my favorite character He's the only character that like he'll go get pussy. He'll abandon his kid. I loved when he abandoned his kid taylor

He had this boring fucking annoying kid named alexander Kid was soft that kid wharf was like you must learn to be a warrior. I don't want to be a warrior His mom was half human kalar was her name. She was a bad bitch. Kalar had this camel toe outfit she wore. It was nice. But but one of Worf's enemies, I think, from the House of Duras, he killed Kalar and in cold blood. And what did Worf do?

He went to Kalar's ship and murdered him. Like immediately in the middle of a Star Trek episode, you're like, oh, I guess they'll be. They did that thing where the good guy swings his sword and you and when you pan down the sword's next to the bad guy's head you know he he did when they pan down it's like in the guy's chest warf warf like the the Klingons when one of them dies they do this thing where uh they open the eyes of the dead person like ah like how crazy wide and then they all howl at the sky to like let the dead and Stovacorn know that a warrior is on the way. I've always thought that was pretty cool too.

That's what I want done. It looks cool on screen. Oh, it's so cool. Dude, if you Google Star Trek camel toe, you get a lot of hits. I'm not saying I just did that but one of these is a dude Can I ask you before is he on the bridge wearing a full body suit like covers everything no no it's more like a bikini and here I'll actually we can oh he's blonde he's on like a he's on yeah yeah yeah Jogging share this with the show I think they all want to see this dudes camel toe But before I look at I already know on that planet one of the things they tell they tell they tell them right away They're like we jog everywhere here. Yep. That's the episode These people are hanging out with they're like they're welcome to our planet. It's fucking paradise

Don't take this down yet We all put out on the first date by the way and we jog everywhere the lady says says and then they all start jogging and her titties are everywhere because there's no bra And the only the bad part about this planet it turns out, you know There's always a little little dirt beneath the the rug Wesley they're playing like this ballgame and Wesley the youngest character on the show is teenager young boy trips and falls into like a flower garden that was covered up and they're like oh you broke the flowers and They arrest him and they're like there's only one punishment for every crime on this planet death

And they're gonna kill him from falling in the flowers and so that that turns out to be the seedy underbelly It's very silly, but you get all this moose knuckle and camel toe. Look at the hers is Good, I don't know that There's it's almost a tie. I love it. Uh this dude's body is like a regular dude who doesn't lift. I was watching Alien last night and uh the first guy to come out of the hyper chamber or something had a body that was very equivalent to this one and I was like when did John Hurt stops the first guy out of the thing?

Okay. When did actors stop having to have like six packed abs and model like bodies? Cause this dude just, he didn't prep for this role. That just him. I mean, this doesn't seem like a major character. So I feel like they were probably like, all right, quick little casting. Are you willing to wear this absurd outfit? And he's like, I would prefer not to. And they're like, do you want to be in Hollywood? And then they made him wear it. I feel like nowadays, maybe there's a bad example I'll be proving wrong, but like a random role

in the Bachelor, if you want to be the star's dad, you have to have well-defined pecs and at least a four pack in Hollywood. Every single, no one looks like this in Hollywood anymore. Unless they're like, who's the guy from Cast Away, he's old now. Tom Hanks. Tom Hanks, right?

Like Tom Hanks could get away with a normal body, but any up and coming actor, no way. Yeah, Tom Hanks is all, I watched that eight millimeter movie last night with Nick Cage, and Nick Cage takes his shirt off at one point, he's been beaten up, and he's like cleaning his face off. And I was like, damn, Nick Cage and Nick Cage takes his shirt off at one point he's been beaten up and he's like shit he's like cleaning his face off and I was like damn Nick Cage is ripped like like right from the back

he's got like you can see the striations that go up from his waist to like his mid rib cage like you can see all that musculature as he bends over and twists and stuff and it's like Nick Cage is ripped as fuck in this movie but you look at him and you think he's just like the dweeby guy by the way eight millimeter. I highly recommend that movie too. That's this that's my second Kyle pic for the week I watched that last night. I had never seen it It's Nick Cage's investigator trying to prove a snuff film is real and so he's on the seedy underbelly of LA's porn industry going place to place looking for real snuff films and dealing with like Creepy BDSM freaks Joaquin

Phoenix is like his guide in that world he works at a porn store and uh finally they get to like Gandolfini's fucking great he gives an amazing performance he's a piece of shit scummy porn scout um he's he's uh he his emotions and and uh scenes run the gamut in that when he goes from like scary Powerful bad guy to like please don't kill me begging. Um to like like pitiful. It's uh, it's a good fucking movie though I watched I was an hour and a half in and I was like this thing's about to wrap up Right and I paused it 30 more minutes left and I was like, oh my god How can there be 30 more of this crazy shit? It was dark and gritty It was and apparently I read that they changed the original. I think it's based on a book

They changed the original story to make it more of a happy ending and I was like fuck That's the happy spin. I couldn't have watched the sad spin. It was it reminded me so much of seven it was very gritty and dark and depressing and you watch Nicolas Cage's character like really get Like he gets dirt on him and it that won't wash off with this investigation, you know, like like yeah he loses pieces of his humanity along the way trying to like get to the truth and There's a scene where I won't spoil it. It's a good movie highly recommend eight millimeter had never seen it before for some reason

But it's fucking great. It really affected me last night I went to bed and I was like I'm gonna get up and watch a cartoon or something before I actually turn in I had To get a family guy. I needed something light-hearted Goofy the palate cleanser. Yeah, I need a pal cleanser. How far are you from that shooting Kyle? There was a shooting a school shooting in Georgia for two. Yeah Couldn't be an hour away probably. Yeah, you know, I think that's sort of northeast of me up in the

Near the mountains or near is the shooter alive. Yeah, 14 years old. They're trying him as an adult Yep, I know how like distasteful this sort of thing is But as a person who was really stupid at 14, I generally don't approve of them being tried as adults I mean if you'd shoot people up like yeah, yeah, that person can't be allowed in society anymore. Like, ever? Yeah, 100%. Never. Like, no, you cannot be a part of society. I grade a lot of things through this lens too. Like, you do a really bad act at like 14 or 16. And I just know how different a person I was at 20 than I was at like even

17. And I'm like, I extend that same grace to other people. Like it. I mean, but none of us ever would have killed people. I have never been charged with killing anyone. That's true. You've never been charged with killing anyone. But at 14, like you might've lashed out, you know,

at 14 you could've. Yeah. I don't know, 14 is so, I'm'm trying to remember 14 like what grade is that? A finished ninth in it Ninth grade, I think yeah Oh man, ninth grade me was like I don't know if You know not a bright guy, right? Bad decision maker bad decision maker like like really emotionally driven. I could I could be you know, I

the problem here is that By the 20s 20 he's 14 now when he's 20. He's not gonna be a normal 20 year old either He's gonna be someone who's been in this is already not a normal 14 year old. He just killed a bunch of people Yeah, but he's not gonna come in. He's not gonna grow out of whatever this is in the system. It is the problem. So Yeah, I don't know what he might be right maybe that I mean, what do you kill this I might be wrong I got house him for the next 80 years We lock him up or we house him try him as an adult because he just killed a lot of people and the answer is yes We house him for the next 80 years and keep him under the I tell you what we cannot do is we cannot we cannot put him in a class led by some social worker and then put him out

alongside normal people we can't do that maybe maybe I think it's a case-by-case basis I look in this case in this situation it looking at the victims it looks like he just went on a spree it just it looks like he was just hurting people he wasn't picking his victims you think I don't know they all seem so different the black kid white kid Lady teacher male teacher like it's not like he That to me says a little bit of something, but I don't know it I draw the same conclusion I didn't know that yeah You know if all the victims are like kids or all of them are like teachers or all of them are one race or something

Every one of them was on the football team one might assume he was getting bullied by the football team. Yeah. Yeah. Like he was targeting, but yeah, they're giving our governor a hard time right now because of some of his pro gun moves in the past and he's, he has done a few, but none of them would have exacerbated what happened or none of them allowed to have what happened. What I know is you can't get, I'm sorry, you don't need a license to carry concealed in Georgia anymore.

And Loki, I'd like that. I don't know. I'm torn because I don't want to go through off topic, but I didn't come from a gun family. So for me, the process of getting a concealed license was really educational. I didn't know stuff and that course taught me a lot about like when it's okay to shoot, it's changed because of the Catholic doctrine. But I needed to know that, I didn't know it,

some of it wasn't intuitive or obvious. So it was a really good experience for me that I'd like other people to have. On the other hand, I can see why other people don't need it. I don't know, maybe if you could just take a test and skip the class, that'd be worth something. I got the answer. What I love, it's the same thing they do for car insurance.

Like I took driver's ed, I didn't need driver's ed, but I took it and I got like a 15, 20% discount on my car insurance because of it. Maybe you could do something like that with the gun stuff, right? Like, you know, if you take the class, you get a hundred dollars off that gun, right? Or, you know, if you take the class,

you know, it speeds a class you know it speeds the paperwork process up something like that the permits great to have for further gun purchases that's one thing I would tell people if you get that concealed carry permit you don't have to do a 40 44 73 or whatever you have to do the whole form you just you fill at the top of it my name but then you hand them your concealed carry and they're just like yeah you can have a gun yeah here's your gun sir like the TSA pre-approved line yeah yeah that thing's pretty horrific you hate a you hate to see a school shooting but I always say like one side acts like the solution is right

there to be to be had but the but the other side won't do it for them and I always say like what what would have stopped this like what would have stopped this and in gun legislation? Sort of like confiscating all the guns in the state of Georgia What would have stopped this and it all we need we need laws that say you've got to keep your gun locked up or the parents Liable we already have those I bet his parents will be liable. They took all the parents guns They showed up to parents guns Did you know your old can't own a gun? They bought that kid a gun for a holiday present Maybe my parents bought me a car when I was 13, but if the law comes to repossess the car, they're not gonna talk to me So I guess the paperwork was surely under the parents name as you for people who don't know the laws

Typically to own a rifle you have to be eighteen and a pistol twenty-one. I it might vary by state but that's pretty normal and uh um so he's fourteen. The gun wasn't technically his but it was a gift that his parents bought him for Christmas birthday. I don't know. I got guns every year for Christmas and birthdays but I knew as far as the law was concerned, these was daddy's guns. You know what I mean? I knew that I had no right to carry them in public I even when I was hunting if I had to cross a road, I'd be like

I'm not exactly supposed to be doing this It's a thing But but yeah, I don't know what law would have prevented this and I don't like every gun short of that I mean it not background checks not concealed carry laws not like he did it in a no gun zone right. I'm pretty sure every school is a no gun zone. I don't know Georgia that well but uh it's not like gun free zones are kind of stop shooters and I see people oh can't believe T every every TSA metal detector this on flights But no metal detectors in the in the classroom. Do you think?

He went through a metal detector like if there had been a metal detector there he just shot the guy operating at first right like There's no way to stop this short of taking all the guns and there's more guns here than there are people and it ain't even close There's like three or four times more guns here than there are people here. There's we'd have the biggest black market gun operating on earth. Like there's two, there's too many. Yeah. African-American gun markets.

We have the African-American gun markets. Is that the somehow African-American market feels more racist than black market? Well, it is literally is because black market is the same Walmart and I don't think there's any way to stop it I don't know what a black market gun market is anyway to me that's peer-to-peer sales and that seems to be that should be constitutionally protected I don't like the fucking gun registration stuff I think I feel like that's absurd I feel like it's an overreach some 1984 I don't like the idea of a big list There by who has one and what they have and I don't like the idea that I can't sell

Not me in particular as I'm a fucking felon But I don't like the idea that a normal law abiding son of a bitch can't sell his brother a shotgun without Getting big brother involved, you know It looked like I can't sell my actual blood brother a gun without getting big brother government involved to be our intermediary Bullshit bullshit. This was Tommy's gun. I you know, I gave him $300 when he needed it. He gave me the gun Now he's got $300 when he needed it. He gave me the gun. Now he's got $300 again. I'm giving it back to him, god damn it. And I don't need you taking $10

and making a check mark on a list every time me and my buddies decide to swap rifles or shotguns. And if you're not part of gun culture, you might think of guns as like, I don't know. Yeah, we have that one. Of course we don't have 40. Of course we'd never trade one for, maybe we think of it like a TV set, you know, like why do you have so many? I've yeah, I've got a TV set. I don't have 50 of them. I don't obsess over TV sets. I don't go to TV set meets

It's a different it's kind of its whole culture It's a whole thing and like the more the merrier and people like all the varieties and people swap and sell them all the time I have bought so many guns and parking lots and sold guns in parking lots of gas stations and liquor stores and gun stores. We'd go at, we, I'd be at the gun store, meet a fellow gun lover. He'd mentioned that he's trying to sell his sig and I'd be like, what are they trying to give you? They said four hundreds. I'll give you 500 right now. Let's go to the bank. You know what I mean? Like, like I did that so many times and vice versa. If I had some piece of shit, I didn't want anymore. You want this little Macack then this piece of shit. Yeah $80 to take it off my hand

$81 right now Yeah, I agree with you on the gun stuff yeah, I actually I know I'm kind of a Democrat on the show But I'm as pro gun as Kyle is actually and I know I'm kind of the Democrat on the show, but I'm as pro-gun as Kyle is actually and I disagree with one word of that. Yeah, just there's like there's no way to legislate it out given where we already are. It upsets me when they paint the right or at least the gun people as callous to the deaths of children and and and and and we're not it's awful if everybody hates it as much as you do let's just start at that point but again i say what would you change that would have stopped this from happening i get that you don't like that a kid shot other

kids it's awful we all fucking hate it and unlike. I don't think we should just get over it I was gonna say that was kind of callous the next day being like you gotta get over it These happen all the time like comes out your team loses like it's a lot of games in the season like like no No, children are fucking dead. These parents were our lives are crushed. They're ruined Like the the witnesses to it will have ptsd and fucking nightmares and beyond drugs that make their own lives go into spirals from this this is a this is a butterfly effect of horror that's been perpetrated by this this mentally ill fucking kid and Nobody likes that nobody wants that everybody wants to stop it But short of taking all the guns sort of sending the Marine Corps in neighborhood to neighborhood with metal detectors and dog and gun sniffing dogs How do you stop it? And it's a genuine question. I want to plan.

I want to see it on paper. Because if you're telling me that extended background checks, that's what I was just talking about a minute ago when I can't sell my buddy a gun, first of all. And second of all, it ain't stopping a criminal who wants a gun. That's the underlying problem of it all is that the guy who wants to do crimes with the gun will not be perturbed or deterred by deterred by a by law He is by his very definition a law breaker. If anything, he might be overjoyed with an extra one. Oh This is a crime as well. We're knocking them out of the park today. That's eight crimes one gun. Yeah There are some gun laws. I like it not. One thing that happened in the last 10 years, I think is when when someone files for like a like a woman, for example, is

being stalked by an ex-boyfriend or threatened and abused and he's banging on the door and she goes and gets a restraining order, they can take his gun even though he hasn't shot anyone yet. They can say, listen, you've already held her against the wall with your hand on her neck you've already threatened her we're taking your gun for a year and if you're good for that year you get it back they do that now and it sounds like he's being punished for not having committed a gun crime yet but I don't hate it it seems like that is a natural response to someone who's

threatening and bullying somebody. I don't know about that. Like there's just, there's just too much. There could be a lot of room there. People having stuff taken away unjustly. Like because anything that exists like that will be overreached by the government and it won't stop at like this. Oh, here's a picture evidence of him choking me. Like I fear that it would get to a point of like oh look at this person they made some not too uh posts that we don't like on facebook let's let's go uh let's go take their guns too because it's oh we just added a new provision on this same law that says now social media posts can constitute a justification for this and then and i hate to

say it but like if you do that to him it he might just go get another gun Or he might just come beat her to death. You know what I mean? Like I like the idea of the law though I like the idea of red flag laws and I like the idea of no fly lists too Because I don't want to fly with a psychopath But I'm worried that one day I'm gonna have to pee real bad and they're gonna tell me to sit down and I'm like nah Man, I'm not gonna piss my pants. I'm going in that bathroom. If I fall down, it's on me. And I just force my way up there and I piss. And when I come out, they're fucking de-planing or some shit and the authorities are there and you're like, you're on a no-fly list, Mr. Pee Pee Pants.

Next time, fucking just piss yourself. Well, wait a minute. Don't put me on there with the crazies and that guy with the Burger King crown. Now, now what, well, what's wrong with that guy? You know, they're putting me on the same list as that guy who tried to open the goddamn door. Okay. Yeah. Those guys, if you try to open the door mid flight, we got it.

You can't, you can't. Did he open the door? Yeah. No, did he get it open or did he just, I think he got it partially open to the point where they were depressurizing the cabin. I think it has multiple stages where first it goes out and then maybe it does another thing and then it slides. Dude, not to Mark Wahlberg this, but if I were in that exit row, that's not happening. Wouldn't have went down like that. I'm shutting it right down.

That's what he said. He said, wouldn't have went down like that. That's all I'm saying. It wouldn't have went down? Any of the three of us in the exit row? We prevent that guy. How high was the altitude on that? You probably don't know. I have no idea. It is incredibly hard. I don't think there's a human on the planet who can open a plane door at cruising altitude. Like it's not a thing. I don't think there's a chimpanzee or a silverback gorilla who could open a plane's door because the plane is pressurized and the outside is at high altitude and all that cabin pressure is holding the door closed. They're not locked. They don't need to be locked because the cabin pressure is holding it close. It's like eight thousand the internal cabin pressure of a plane is like eight thousand

feet equivalent to and the external cabin pressure is like 32,000 36,000 feet whatever planes fly it and you can't you have to Pull the door in and then it tilts sideways and then it's like it like tucks out and That pulled the door in stage is nearly impossible. See what you're not counting for the fact that these were defective Boeing airplane doors So with these Opposite They've got it open on their own. It's like a balloon door. He just kicked it. Yeah. Yeah. Well, then he was probably doing it close to takeoff or landing. That would be weird about the red flag law, red flag laws and stuff like that. But, but I want it.

I don't know how you solve the problems that we have with gun violence i don't think you do i don't think you do without uh like making the economy better i think it's genuine genuinely that i think happier people don't shoot each other oh yeah there's definitely an association between crime and the economy shootings happen when it's in hot months you always see that like the hotter it is the more people will get fucked yeah well you know have you ever been hot and sweaty the ac breaks just want to kill someone one thing after another but we've all had bad days you don't go unhinged mode because but but like what if there was something real bad that happened on top of that hot sweaty day you lose your job then your

wife says that's it and then you're hot and you're sweaty and you're thinking like the only reason i'm in this, sweaty piece of shit car is because I got her the safe minivan for that kid that turned out ain't mine. You know what, motherfucker? You know what is mine? This glock. This is mine and I can control this. And then you go on a rageful like rampage or whatever, you know, like all I'm saying

is he felt like that was the only thing he could control. And what he really should have done is seen that he can still control what he eats and develop a severe eating disorder. Is that what you do? I think maybe if you have someone who's that ill and so lashing out because of a lack of control, you guide them away from the violence and more towards the like, oh, you're looking a little chubby, maybe throw up. I know you're thinking about shooting up a mall, but have you considered bulimia? Yeah. Have you considered hot yoga and cucumber salads? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I don't think that was awful. I saw that on your summer point, also crimes and violent crime go down in snowy winter months in the cold areas. Think about that. Someone's sitting there like, this fucking guy,

I can't stand it anymore. I got to take him out. But it's like snowing and you'd have to shovel your driveway and you're going to get halfway through shoveling your driveway and be like, you know what? I'm not leaving. I'm staying home. I'm going to make some cocoa, enjoy my day, and not commit a horrible thing. You can commit a triple homicide, but I'm not leaving. I'm staying home. I'm gonna make some cocoa, enjoy my day, and not commit a horrible thing. You like to commit a triple homicide, but I'm not motivated enough to shuffle the drive. Yeah, that can wait for spring. And by the time spring comes around,

maybe he's cooled off. Yeah, but then you look over. Or actually know the evidence would show that he's just been just rubbing his hands and just wanting it for months, because then summer happens and that guy gets out. What was the thing we blamed for crime Altima sedans? Maybe something like that

White Nissan Altima's I forget it's for like ten years ago. No one remembers this Now we do a lot of these like We were talking about how cars don't kill people people kill people of G to watch out for I think it was white Nissan Altima's but I could be wrong That my mother drove a white Nissan Altima Uh for for several years when I was in high school, she got they changed the body style She got the new one. It's pretty cool Yeah

And if she couldn't take it out on you with those little punches in the kitchen imagine what she may have done She had a crush so many people with that Altima. She had the 3.5 liter in that bitch. I think we go That's a quick little car. Yeah, she got the best one I remember thinking like like damn this is a nice Nissan this thing will zip I think there's a speedometer went to like 175 or something that little car that's such a good move I don't think that car went to 175 I got it up to 121 time yeah yeah I had. I had a speedometer in my Volkswagen GTI. I think it went to like 185 or something, but the car went to 112 indicated. So motorcycles mean business though. They can. Yeah.

Like how many production motorcycles right now? We'll do 175. All of them. No, no, I don't. But the go-fast ones will do that. Yeah, those are the leader bikes. Like a sport bike. If you've got a sport bike, it'll do 175, right? I'm not sure if the 600s will. They'll maybe threaten that, but the leader bikes will. Yeah, shockingly fast.

And then the fact that they do it over the course of a really short distance, whereas a car has to like... Yes. It's hard to get a car up to 175. You got to pick your spot or you got to have a badass car or really both. You can get a bike up to that speed on the interstate anytime you want. Yeah, dude, bikes go from zero to 60 really fast, like faster than a Formula One car. These are bikes you can buy around the corner. You know what's really appealing to me, but I have no use for it And it would just sit in my garage is those electric They're like between a bike a bicycle and a motorcycle and they're electric like you can't even you look at it and you're like

Art it looks cool. Is that a bicycle or a motorbike? It's like it's kind of in between actually how fast does it go 60? What that goes 60? Oh, yeah, but it's got those beefy tires. Yeah, go off, bro. Wherever you wanna go, bro. I've ridden those. They're a blast, man. They wheelie really well. There's no shifting. It's a good time. I have a friend also that that didn't write his but so he was into mountain biking, right? And he's a really really like he's an exceptionally wealthy guy. He's into mountain biking. He buys a mountain bike for like

ten grand or something in ebike and he's like, all right, this is cool, but this is a low end one. So then he gets like a $20,000 e-bike. And his wife is like, he can't have a motorcycle, but two of us in this little pair of motor group have motorcycles at this point. And he's maybe like wishing he could have one. And his wife says, no,

but the e-bike is kind of a motorcycle through the back door. Like, as you mentioned, those things start going 60, 70 miles an hour. Yeah, that of a motorcycle through the back door like like as you mentioned those things start going 60 70 miles an hour Yeah, that's a motorcycle it it it's a motorcycle cosplaying as a bicycle. No one needs the green I want that shit in like army green. Yeah, so this is the direction He way and he basically got a motorcycle and told his wife. It was a bicycle. They need a cover on that chain That chain was exposed. Is it moving?

Of course. I'm not convinced. The motor's not in the rear hub? I'm not sure. Not on that one. That one had a chain that was going to the back tire. Yeah, so you could pretend to pedal it every once in a while, right? Oh, really? I might be right. I could be wrong.

I'm definitely more ignorant about these. I saw a TikTok-tock video one and thought it was fucking cool though. I was like, that is fucking cool. If I lived, I remember Taylor used to live like right above a restaurant or some shit like in downtown or in like a little towny area. And like, this would be so ideal for that. If you you could just take it up into your apartment and then like zip around down running errands i have this fantasy life where that's what i do even being like a look at the rear hub on that all right yeah that's the electric motor i'm seeing when i was living in the city area it was like the peak of those bird electric pay-and-go scooters and so it was just like like on the way home from bars and you'd see like a whole gaggle of like homeless guys just flying down the road sharing those.

Oh. Yeah. But did they pay for them? I don't know. Yeah. Apparently there were some issues where you could just do it for free. I don't remember how that worked.

Oh. Yeah, I'd see someone where it's like, I see that guy. I choose to believe Mr. Beast littered 20s throughout St. Louis. Yeah. And the electric bike business boom. I'd see, I'd be like, I choose to believe Mr. Beast littered 20s throughout St. Louis. Yeah. And then the electric bike business, boom. Because I'd see, I'd be like, that's that little fucker with the pretend broken legs

that sits out in front of Caribou Coffee and asks for food, and then if you try and get him food, he suddenly has a big old attitude about it because he doesn't want food, he wants drugs. And so he just wants the money. I think he has a point. I'm not hungry right now, but I can go for, but I can go for some drugs. Just a little bit of meth and then zoom around on the bird scooters. Yeah, that was fun. What drug is most likely to make you homeless? Probably heroin. Yeah. Probably heroin. It seems like the one that makes... And I say that because it's so illegal that if you get caught you're gonna be

Fucked up and they're gonna the justice isn't gonna ruin you but also like when you're on it You're not a productive member of society in the least it seems like I don't see I don't imagine or it's certainly not displayed in media That someone's like yeah, give me a little bit of a heroin. All right, got ahead into this meeting. Catch you later You know, it's not bad. It's like you're like nodding off with a syringe in your arm. It's what I'm picturing like the whole day going on. You can be productive on math, right? Extra productive. You can fight a whole world war.

So a lot of the service industry, a lot of the service industry and a particular like truck drivers and anybody who is not as prevalent now with truck driving because they've got Limits on how long how long they could drive per day kind of what they did to uh, uh the deadliest Catch yeah crab fishing. Um, but it used to be that dude. Can you do 50 hours straight? Fuck yeah, double overtime. Let's go and they would they would be wired on something So I think a lot of the service industry still runs on amphetamines of one kind or another. Yeah. I mean, if you're going to pick a drug with the hopes of not becoming homeless, some kind of upper that helps you do your job is just going to be better. Is cocaine an amphetamine? I'm stupid. No, it's just another kind of just different upper.

Okay. Cause I associate that with wall Street because I was alive in the 80s Guys got a lot done on Okay, which like like hang out with a bunch of people on cocaine and then hang out with a bunch of people smoking weed and it's like Yeah, if I had to pick one of these groups to be in charge of my finances I'm gonna pick the coke guys like because like the weed it's like, I don't even think you're going to bother investing my money. Like, you're just going to sit on it and do nothing.

But the Coke guys, you know, at least they're at least they got big dreams. Or they'll tell you vehemently, they're going to get it done. And then they will not once they've woken up and they're like hung over. You're asking about salvia the other day. I that's one of those that I won't touch that when I go to the smoke shop. Is it still legal? Oh, yeah. When I go to the smoke shop, they'll sell you like bags of it. I've never seen so many capsules in a they sell like four pound bags of capsules.

So much. It's like like a grocery bag full of Salvia. I don't know. I don't care how much it is I've never asked but they've got so many different like ways to take it and that's Is it like it's like mushrooms or acid, right? Yeah, I think it's like a mild like psychedelic But it also has I've heard that it has similar effects to like opiates and and the way it can make you feel Are you sure you're not thinking of creating them? I am thinking of creating the other fucking That it has similar effects to like opiates and and the way it can make you feel Are you sure you're not thinking of kratom? I am thinking of kratom the other fucking yeah green nonsense Somehow legal drug which one do they have bags of kratom? Oh, I didn't know i've never seen salvia at the stores. I guess i've never looked

Unless i'm unless i'm confused But I thought that they sold it there. I remember seeing those big bags of green capsules and maybe even green like they're like lawn trimmings that they were selling I don't want any part of any of that because it reminds me of What was the oh, what's the fake weed that that we're like? Spice the worst drug of all time it could Spice is the worst drug of all time. It couldn't have been more stressed out and high strong while I was high on spice. It looked pretty cool in the movie Dune. Oh yeah, blue eyes. Dude, I would do some of that Dune spice. I'd be all about that. I'd be boofin' it. I'd be boofin' fuckin' Dune spice. Wait, is boofing put it in your butt. Yeah. Yeah, I get it up there

I want to fully absorb it. You don't want to waste a speck of dune spice It's the most valuable substance in the whole galaxy. What he entered to collect interstellar travel depends on right? I was being stupid. I'm sorry All right Gonna give us long life gonna give us powers insights and those blue eyes are fucking sex that I'd love to have glowing blue eyes That I I don't know much about the whole kratom thing other than really what you just said that apparently it like feels like an opiate

when you drink it, but like a much weaker version of that. But I have a buddy who like will make kratom tea sometimes and drink that, cause they do. Kyle's right. They have like, I haven't been to one of the legal weed shops in a long time, cause it's been legal here for a while, but they just have these giant cardboard boxes with like, just a loose plastic bag full of green powder. And it's like green dragon, whatever. And he says you

make it into a tea. And it's the most it's the most foul tasting, disgusting, horrible concoction. Like he says, it's like a challenge to drink this tea. Like it's a nightmare to do it. Like imagine the worst. I did a small amount in college once, but like, I literally just saw season two of Always Sunny breathing at me on the TV a little bit. Like I didn't take enough. If you do like three different, so people don't know anything about mushrooms. If you do like 0.2 grams, that's a micro dose. Maybe it cheers you up.

Maybe you don't even notice you're on it. If you do between three and five grams, that's what they call a hero's dose. And you know, in that you're in for an experience. Okay. Three grams of mushrooms, which is maybe the most I've ever done is a chore. Like I, it fills your whole Palm and it's the worst tasting mushrooms ever.

And you're like, I don't know. I had it with cranberry juice or something. No, this is a job. I tell you what I did is I thought I thought I did a good job. I took to Stito's scoops, you know the corn chips And and I put the mushroom in there and then I like got got a heaping problem with these mushrooms. They're not dry enough Salsa is for I need something to hide the texture and the taste and the dryness So like a corn chip with ton of like hot salsa Everything's just getting

munched up in there now. You couldn't really tell that you're eating something gross. I bet if you wanted queso instead, that'd be even better. I wanted the salsa. I felt like that the spice and the vinegar and the wetness of it. Like the mushrooms are gross. What do you mean? Strong enough flavor. Like you can't hide something overpowering tea or something. I think it was Taylor who told me that's why edibles are often like chocolates and gummy bears because the marijuana itself is not a tasty thing. You can't hide it with something not tasty or you know mildly tasty. Yeah it's kind of that but they've never made a chocolate or a gummy that hides the foul

taste of of wheat. I think it's more to do with the process of creating edibles lends itself to chocolate and gummies, bonding to the fat content in the chocolate. And it's a different separation process. Maybe they use alcohol to separate the THC when they make gummies. I've read some tutorials, but I've never made candies. But even so, like when people say stuff, like you'll hear people say things like, oh, I had this candy bar and I just kept eating little pieces off of it. And lo and behold, Oh no, that was 30 minutes ago. And it was a 200 milligram bar of chocolate. It's like, you're lying because like if you had a, if like I was at one of your houses

and you had like a dish of candies and it was sitting out as if it was just like a receptionist dish and it was weed chocolate, like I'd take one and be like, oh, that's weed. That's either a weed chocolate or it's the worst made chocolate of all time. It couldn't be anything else. You can smell it. You're right. They stink of weed. I can't argue with the chocolate thing because I don't think I've ever had weed chocolate, but I can say I'd find the gummies to be not far off gummies. I can tell the difference in those gummies because if I'm like having some nice Haribo's,

those are delicious and tasty, but these sweet gummies, very different. Like these are disgusting. They're off. I think I love sugar and rarely have it. I have the only sugar I'll have today, I promise you will be a single gummy cube. Like at least direct sugar. If there was some in a tostita or something then yeah. Dude, I'm telling

you like those gummies are rancid. I roll them up in a little bowl. They're delicious to me. I swallow it like a pill so I don't get any of the flavor in my mouth. I have heard you guys say, even amongst like our sponsors, like everyone we've ever had, like yeah you know, just take it like a pill. No, man. I chew that shit up. I savor it. I don't swallow it right away. I'm missing the goodness of the gummy. There's sugar in that thing. It's because your choice is just sugar. And so like, you're like, I guess I don't really want to be high, but I can take a couple of counties, you know,

it's, it's for the drugs. Can I get another jar of those Flintstones, please? It walks in on you. Oh, I'm sorry. What? This is a regular Reese's? Oh, no. You ever eat way too many Flintstones vitamins? No. No. way too many Flintstones vitamins? No. No. What? I did grow up with them but there was a kid in the 90s who died from eating a ton of them and I still remember my mom telling me a story about that as a kid. That was my brother. Like you know that these aren't candies. I didn't know you had a brother. You can die. And I was like what? I don't. He ate two jars of them. He's done. I loved them. I dared him to do it.

I don't think they make those anymore. They probably don't. Now it's those vitamin gummies, which I also have been known to eat a few too many of. But they'll give you diarrhea if you eat too many. Remember when we were doing that fitness challenge like six years ago, seven years ago, whatever it was? And I remember I was like in my head, I'm like, man, the holding, the thing holding me back is going to be time and hydration. Cause I just need to be able to sit there and just grind for hours a night. Cause I got, I won't be able to get any MEPs during the work day the next day. So I just got a grind. So I got to stay super hydrated.

And so for like a week and a half, I was getting tons of maps and I was drinking Pedialyte like it was water, like because I was like, if I can hydrate, I'll be even more elite. And so I was like finishing a big 32 ounce of Pedialyte and go grab another one and start drinking that. And like two days in, I'm like, ah, man, my body must be flushing out the toxins because I have had brutal diarrhea. Drinking salt water. Drinking salt water.

And I was drinking tons of other liquid too. And so I was just diarrhea for days until I realized like, I think I read the back of a Pedialyte and it's like, you know, Oh, you're feeling really dehydrated? Drink half of this. I'm like, Oh, so don't drink a four pack in one evening. Okay. So yeah, don't do that PSA. It will give you the shits and you'll have to, it'll take like two full days for you to go back to normal if you stop.

Dude, I just noticed the thing, Jack, I'm sorry, Zach put in about Kratom. I want to read it. Kratom's effects. There are two effects I like, see if you can pick them out. On the body include nausea, itching, sweating, dry mouth, constipation, increased urination, ticardia, perhaps pronounced. Tachycardia? That's like hardly. Tachycardia. Thank you. Vomiting, drowsiness, loss of appetite. They experience anorexia, weight loss, insomnia, hepatotoxicity, seizure, and hallucinations.

Sounds awful. What's the good part? The hallucinations? Weight loss and hallucinations. You're going to be so ill you won't be able to get food down or keep it down at least. I accept your terms. I think those are similar side effects to like opiate pills, right? Like not being able to shit. like, uh, opiate pills, right? Like not being able to shit. You can take a lot of opiates to get to the constipation part. Um, they all, they do make you itchy though. Like, like I think most, I kind of like the itchiness. It's kind of like,

you ever like have an itch that's pleasing to scratch. It can be like that. And if you can, you don't want to obviously hurt yourself and like get like a weirdo, like scratch your skin off. But if you if you had like I don't know like a back scratcher or like a loofah or something and you hop in the shower It's kind of feels really good to like scritch yourself everywhere when you're really itchy I would hate that I can't relate to this at all when I take you're also high as fuck Only take an opiate. It's like post-surgery never recreationally. Um, I get the constipation very easily. I'm good at that and I've never itched. I've certainly never enjoyed an itch. I've heard the constipation thing. Yeah, I'm pretty much never constipated if I'm eating normally.

Yeah, I didn't think it was a real thing. I didn't believe it. I was like, what do you mean? Like, you just, poop won't come out? And then Wings, of course, made up that crazy story about poop like getting log jammed. I was like, and then wings of course, made up that crazy story about poop, like getting logged. I was like, maybe other people's poops are different than mine or like, maybe their buttholes are shaped different. Like, like, like, do I understand yours is like one of those Lego things. He comes out like a star. I spent my whole childhood star, right?

It was like my normal moon butthole. Star right was like my normal. I've got a moon butthole Dude I used when I was a kid I pooped like every four or five days that was typical for me I remember we went whitewater rafting for a week down the Grand Canyon and there were no toilets there Of course, you just had to like manage and I was like well does not poop this week and I didn't that's insane It is and it's do stuff this week and I didn't. That's insane. It is insane. How do kids do stuff like that? I don't know. You just don't shit for five days and then just have a mass exodus at your home. I'm still like, it seems what happened to me in prison and me not pooping for weeks like that while eating, I wasn't eating much. I was on an extreme like diet, but I was eating something.

And it's like, if you took the food that I ate between the time I had pooped last and between weeks later when I pooped the second time, my God, it would cover the table. It would be like a bucket of food. You'd be like three gallons of food, four gallons of food. How much food do you eat over the course of, I don't remember how long I went without pooping.

I think it might've been six weeks or something. Like I remembered it better back then. Like whatever I said is, I was so worried. I was going to the nurse like any day. I was like, I was rubbing my stomach to try to like make something happen while I was in bed. Like maybe it's just like solidified down there or blocked up. So I'm like rubbing where I think my intestines are. Just sort of like. What was the oddest thing? I'm like you were laying in the bathroom and you were like, oh, I'm going to the bathroom.

I'm like, I'm going to the bathroom. I'm like, I'm going to the bathroom. I'm like, I'm going to the bathroom. I'm like, I'm going to the bathroom. I'm like, I'm going to the bathroom. I'm like, I'm going to the bathroom. I'm like, I'm going to the bathroom. I'm like, I'm going to the bathroom.

I'm like, I'm going to the bathroom. I'm like, I'm going to the bathroom. I'm like, I'm going to the bathroom. I'm like, I'm going to the bathroom. I'm like, I'm going to the bathroom. I'm like, I'm going to the bathroom. I'm like, I'm going to up. So I'm like rubbing where I think my intestines are just sort of like, what was the average time that you were laying in the prison bed and you're like, no, I think maybe I did shit actually. Maybe, no, like, no, you didn't ever try and well, no, because it's a little scary to poop in prison.

Right. Like I don't like pooping in front of people. I'm, I'm a private pooper. Well, I'm a private pooper. I'm a very private pooper. I wouldn't poop at school. I pooped at school twice my life. I'm the opposite. I commonly film it and upload it to Motherless. You're Turdchomper69? I thought I recognized that physique. Dude, any illusions I had at a young age about being one of those, because I was always so surprised to go in through school that there were people who were like, I don't poop at school.

I was like, what? So like, if you have to poop, you just decide not to for eight hours? That's ridiculous. I poop in the morning? Just go poop. I poop in the morning before school. And I remember like, like, I used to always have to poop when we'd get to work like when I'd be with my dad working or when I'd be like hunting and he'd be

like look you gotta get on schedule here you gotta you gotta shit in the morning and then your day's ahead of you. You can't be stopping in the middle of the day to have some emergency poop break or you gotta drive to your house. He's like you can't live like this. I mean we had this conversation because we'd be working we'd be like carpenter We'd be on a roof or like like doing a thing over at the farm and I'd like I gotta go It's gonna be a 35 minute ship break cuz I got to drive all the way home We're a farm no I don't know why we ever put a fucking toilet in at that farm. It would have been that goddamn heart Although it would have been that goddamn heart, although it would have been

The toilet home was my safety toilet. Anyway, I wouldn't use the dirty toilet. I was your haven. That was your little Rivendell Yeah, but no I pooped at school twice I specifically remember being so like nervous about my school poop that while I'm pooping I'm like three three wrapping little bits of toilet paper for the wipe Um, i'm i'm getting them so so it can be as in and out as quick as possible You know what I mean? Like i'm getting my little wads of toilet paper ready to go as i'm pooping like all right And then I feel older or a baller with your folder 100 percent. So so i'm making my

With you. Yeah, making my three or four little folds and I'm like rapid wiping I'm like wipe wipe wipe wipe wipe and then like flushing and like as it's flushing I'm getting my shit on as fast as I can and then you gotta make sure the coast is clear I don't anybody see me come out of the stall because I mean a lot of other people to know that you were a pooping person Yeah, I didn't know that I pooped, you know, or like, you know, you know high school is maybe like your poops extra stinky school is, they might be like, oh, your poop's extra stinky. Like a loser. Everybody check out this gay guy shitting in the bathroom. High school is so goddamn mean. You just didn't want to give them an in. So I don't want you to catch me pooping in here. So yeah, twice in my life I pooped in school.

Did I tell you guys, one of my friends, I'm still good buddies with him, we play games all the time. He used to go in high school. He used to go in the bathroom and he'd like wait, because they were Kyle's, I guess, who would like hear somebody come in and they'd like hold their shit on the toilet and not let the next, you know, flume through. And he would walk in, pee, wash his hands. And then he'd go out to the bathroom door to leave. And he said, he'd open it and then he'd let go and he'd close it. And he's like,

it's so funny, dude, because every time you just hear someone go, Oh, and then, and then I was like, I was like, and then what do you do? And he's like, and then I go, I heard you. I heard you shitting. That's my nightmare. And I'm like, dude, this is such a waste of time. I recognize your stupid sneakers, Kyle. Fucking and one, my ass white boy.

You're in trouble now. I'm telling everybody you shit. Yeah, that was funny. I got your now. I'm telling everybody you shit. Secret. I was like, that was, I mean, I've talked before the poop bandits in my high school. Dude, you don't be pooping in front of people. I remember a girl got her tampon stuck one time. Oh my God. There's a kid running down the hall, the hallway. Hey everybody, Meredith got a tampon stuck in her pussy. And then he ran away to the next group. That's just the town crier. He's got a tampon stuck in her pussy. And then he ran away to the next group.

He's the town crier. He's got a belt. Done swallowed the time tampon. It was like Cartman in South Park how he'll run around and just tell everybody that something bad. Hey everybody here Scott Maclise shit his pants like like person group to group just letting everybody know that somebody fucked up. He had an embarrassing moment So yeah

If you've been constipated for that long Was one of the because I thought something was wrong with me But I was a quiet have I have I not shit do I have that have I developed asshole cancer in prison? For here mental trauma well Solution, but you're not going to like it. We're going to have to let snow get up in there. Reggie, would you come in here? Yeah. Think it wings his grandma.

It was 100%. Oh, sideways. There's your problem right there, Kyle. It was 100% stress, you know? Yeah. The worst is when you're trying to like... I thought you were dehydrated to Oh, no, I had you drink a lot. It's hard to explain but there's like tons of there's there's a really nice ice machine

Like that's probably our nicest thing. We have is it makes those little kernels of ice Oh, yeah, I was like so I was I was drinking a ton and I had like I was I was getting my diet Pepsi's So I had those I could cool those off in my my fake prison cooler Get those nice nice cold for my My once a day chili the diet might have had something to do with that once a day chili I was having with like prison nacho cheese was probably stopping me up pretty good I was just setting like quick crete in your colon it did and you know what the work the weird part is I didn't have Like an impressive poop when I finally did it was just a normal

Okay, kind of poop. Maybe even a less than normal poop. It wasn't- Did you sleep well that night though? You're like, all right, one worry off my heart. I felt safe. Yeah, I was like, okay, we're not, we don't have to go to the nurse

until we're constipated because neither one of us are gonna enjoy that conversation. She doesn't wanna deal with my constipation. Do you think the other inmates would have bullied you? I don't think they would have known, but you. I don't think they would have known but but but no I don't think they would have bullied me About my constipation might offer to help Yeah, you wouldn't have gone down there after like announcing to the other

With his constipation is a form of bullying Constipation is a form of bullying. It is. I know just the thing. You're going to have to let it get in there. Your sweetheart. Just get in there and move it around like a paint stirrer. Oh yeah. Like a plunger.

Ooh. I don't know if that's how it works. No, you'd have to use the handle end. See, that was horrific And I've never had an issue since never had any constipation. So it works You push it down a little farther and then the next time it goes through smoothly mmm Big brain moves me constipation is definitely worse than diarrhea as far as of the two major poop problems

I guess because if you're having diarrhea There is at least a feeling of like the evil is being excised something something's getting done here The badness is being flushed out. I'm closer to the good times, but I imagine because I've never really dealt constipation either like That you're just sitting there But when am I gonna shit? I don't know. Could be. It's what killed us. Was he on opium? Yeah. He was on tons of opiates. He's on all those pills and he was, he was trying to take a hard shit, gave himself like everything. No, there's all sorts of pills though. Elvis was popping handfuls of shit,

but he was constipated trying to take a big old King size dump. His diet was also ridiculous. You've seen hit the sandwiches Do you know about the famous Elvis sandwiches? He would eat those fried peanut butter and Banana sandwiches and no butter banana and bacon it is enormous sandwich Wouldn't he like fly on a private plane in the middle of the night to be like, oh this sandwich place in Philly We're going and I'm gonna Somewhere where they'd make these ridiculous sandwiches. I worked with a guy who sold him cars before he was an old guy obviously school But but he said that Elvis would buy like multiple Cadillacs like like you get all of his boys a Cadillac

Oh, I thought that was pretty cool would be never never imagined Elvis really having like a like a like a posse Entourage or a posse, but I bet he did I bet being an Elvis is posse like like sexy Elvis like like 1958 Elvis or whatever the fuck whenever he was like slim and good-looking Yeah, there'd be a lot of like spillover pussy to be had Is that an Elvis special that looks good to me, man? I gotta say that looks fucking good. I like peanut butter I like banana. I like bacon. I like all those things But how's that banana gonna combine with the bacon the king says it's great sweet salty. I like bacon. I like all those things, but how's that banana going to combine with the bacon? The king says it's great. Sweet, salty.

I trust him. He did die of being fat and drug addicted sandwiches. I mean, he wasn't going to hold back. You know, that, that, that was the most gluttonous delicious thing he could imagine. There was that other guy, the brush Limbaugh. Didn't he have a problem with a constipation? Yeah. Cause he did so many opiates he went deaf Mm-hmm, which is a rough gig for her radio DJ. That's such an important thing to not go if Right. There are a lot of things you could get away with but death is rough. Yeah. Yeah poor guy

He Meadow years ago. He was pretty old freedom winner. Oh my Get out of here with those medals of freedom. Those are fucking like... Those are so silly. They're better than medals of honor, I've heard. People are saying that. Okay, the medal itself looks better. That's what he meant. Hold on, let's see. And it does.

Zach, bring up medal of honor comparison. No, that's what he was saying. No, he was saying medal of honor winners are dead or often fucked up and like Mutilated well our medal of freedom winners are in good shape. That's why it's the better one I thought it was referring to the medal itself like like not the recipients per se but like the build and the substance that the medal was composed of because The medal of honor like like look at that. That's a big ass medal, right? You look like you just like saved the planet from the cling-ons or something

But if you look at the medal of honor, it looks too much like a cod prestige. Right? He's a knight prestige. He's a fucking killer. I want to see the comparison. Let me get the facts right because I was listening. I want to know. It's actually much better.

This is Trump referring to the Medal of Freedom because everyone gets the Congressional Medal of Honor. They're soldiers. They're either in very bad shape or they've been hit many times by bullets or they're dead. She gets the Medal of Freedom and she's a healthy, beautiful woman. They're rated equal, but she got the Medal of Freedom. So he was saying that you get to earn it

and you're not fucked up. That's more of a situational comparison. Like if I meet someone who got a Medal of Honor and someone who got the Medal of Freedom is right there. It's like, I think I know which one garners a little more respect. It's like, what'd you get? Oh, you ran a good campaign on like helping dogs or something. That's so wonderful. That's great. And what'd you do? Oh, you lost your left leg saving 65 people from a brutal murderer. That's, oh, you know, I think, I think I'm going to go with this guy. I think that's more impressive. I found pictures of all the metals and

let's see, Zach, bring those up and we can offer a little, I'll call it constructive criticism of our great nation and what we can do to have better metals, because some of these are not Not that impressive and they're also very bad graphics. So Why are there three different ones different branches of service, right? Oh Mm-hmm. I would think so Obviously the one on yeah Army Air Force Navy Marine Corps and Coast Guard Mm-hmm. I guess they're in the mix on they get their own Navy Marine Corps and Coast Guard share

the third one I think if I'm reading it correctly. I think I like the third one maybe the most. It says Valor. It's definitely not the middle one. Middle one needs a little more pomp and circumstance. Any of those those all look garbage. Here we go. That's much better. Thank you, Zach. Oh, I like any of those. Those all look garbage. There we go. Zoom in on that.

That's much better. Thank you, Zach. Oh, I like that Air Force combat action. That reminds me of some different symbology. I'm quite a fan of it. Oh, Jesus Christ. Oh, hell yeah. You got that Aguila on there looking strong.

How about the one right below it? That kind of, it's got the same vibe. Kind of like an Iron Cross, you mean? Yeah. Yeah, I like that. I like the Bronze Star. The Bronze Star is just a nice simple one. Like an iron cross, you mean? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I like that. You got the I like the bronze star. The bronze star is just a nice, simple one.

I think the distinguished flying cross that was made, right? Look at that. Purple Heart can redo. They can make that a little better. Who the fuck is the guy in the Purple Heart? I always see that little like profiled figure like like who's that? It's a good question. I assumed it was Washington because it's reminiscent of the quarter in my mind. But that may not be it is george washington

You are correct. Is it? Yeah. All right. Well, like it's a reasonable guy to use So I think we're we're all i'm also not impressed by purple hearts because you can get them in such weird ways the like like there's the famous case where like um, the guy was away and his his uh, his barracks were bombed and then when he came back he sat down on like a splinter or some glass from when it happened before and like that was a Purple Heart. Does everyone who gets hurt in combat get a Purple Heart or is it like overlooked? Yes, I think so.

I think you have to apply for it. You have to go and like tell them like, hey, I got a boil on my ass or I got like splinters You know during that last engagement I fell into a thorn bush when the Japs came that's where I was I was I was the one screaming in the thorn bush if you were wondering I'd like gotta be far and away the most common One right? Yeah I was curious You would think people get, get multiples of them too. Like, like I bet, I bet there's some serial abusers. There's a guy with like 37 purple hearts.

Oh, he looks fine. So I have it here. The national defense service metal is the most common one and it's awarded to everyone who enlists during a time of war, which is pretty much everyone for the last 30 years. What I learned from that graphic, Zach, if you can bring it back up, is it seems like the Air Force has the best medals and maybe a little updating. Now, do they have a medal that's for soldiers who left the military as soon as the war started? I don't know.

I wouldn't imagine they would have that. But Air Force combat action, I like the medals that have a little bit of overlap by the way that's bullshit them going after his fucking military record fuck those people like find something wrong with him or get the fuck out of here dude the world war two victory sucks. That's what we made after winning World War II. Where is it? Oh, wow. Crash. That thing should have been an Olympic gold.

It should have been so fucking big. Every soldier should have came home with enough gold on his chest to buy a Ford. It's been 80 some years. It's still our proudest military. Although, hang on. They had to pick a lot of those, though. You got to think they made a million or more of those. I like the uh, do you see the Air Force Cross the bottom right there with the wreath around it? It's pretty, pretty classy. I like the freedom medal a lot. Is that a military one or is that the medal of freedom that we've been talking about? I don't know if that's, I don't think it's a military medal. It's

bottom center just to the right. Yeah. It kind of looks like the freedom. That's what we saw before that's that's that's that's that's what they're going on Like fucking tech company owners and basketball players and shit. Yeah Space is that a new one? Bottom third on the left. Oh That's cool. That's a pretty good one. I. Holy shit. You win the Medal of Honor in space. That's the coolest medal to me. Has it been granted yet? Oh, maybe. Maybe like in secret, right?

Like, do we have like a space badass we don't know about? Right. Like maybe he's up there fighting the Chinese in space, zero grab right now. Chinese? No, he's up there fighting the Xylorgs. Like, I have it in my Neil Armstrong Combat a bladed weapon might be the way to go like like if you had some sort of zero G like close quarters combat I want to I want to fucking like short sword. I don't know if I need zero G Yeah, I want to fuck. What if you just like whip yourself around and like now you're

Sideways trying to sword fight now I'm gonna need a jetpack but not you know just I'll know how to use it and this is like honor has to be like every astronaut wins it every astronaut wins it okay fuck that many astronauts now I hate it now I hate I thought that was like a fucking army that like a Space Force medal where like you went I did and fought somebody on the moon That's like a full the moon that was gonna be cool We when we do our first battle on the moon and some guys a hero That's gonna be a cool metal three-quarters of the people who have won this literally died on the Columbia or the Challenger and so they're not

Like I'm serious like the whole list I'm with trump. It's better to win the medal of freedom than the space one because you get to live afterwards You know, they almost put big bird on that fucking space flight The the challenger that exploded have heard big bird was supposed to be on that So there would have been millions of school children across the United States watching Big Bird go to space and then that bitch would have exploded. It was bad enough that Sally Wright or whatever her name was. They've been in costume with feathers everywhere. Yeah. Yeah. He was going to be in the costume going to space. And if you like when that dude hit the pigeon with his fastball. Oh my God. Yes. That's Randyson. Yes, that's what i'm looking for great pitcher great pitcher. Yeah

He had a meanest fucking face that guy's ugly as He's like six four six six and he's just he looks like a pirate Not the baseball he does he looks like a he looks, you know that protagonist in gta 5 That's like on meth. He's like you play as him and run around and cause problems. I only play games like antagonists. Oh Well, you're missing out GTA 5 is pretty fun. Oh, yeah, you're gonna go play the new Assassin's Creed I didn't those games I Yeah, I think I got bored of Assassin's Creed before I finished the first one ever like I think I was five assassinations into the game

and I was excited when I got it on 360. And it was like the most formulaic, the entire game was the equivalent of Skyrim's Assassin's Guild and no deeper than that. It's like, all right, we need you to kill this guy. Unlike the last one, now you're gonna jump into Hey in a slightly different looking city and then you're gonna stab him and then you're gonna jump into hay in a slightly different looking city And then you're gonna stab him and then you're gonna walk away and everyone's gonna be like oh good done this end

Is it the guy in the white cloak with the bloody rags? Dude tell you're a thousand percent right I live streamed an Assassin's Creed once and I Generally try to be like the authentic me in a live stream. I was pretending to like that game I like you five assassinations in I'm like, what is this just so repetitive and formulaic It wasn't I hate to agree because I know it's a classic and people do love it. I had the same thoughts man I tried to play that game and I got so bored. I didn't care for the gameplay. I didn't find it. I don't like stealth games at all. I never liked the hitman games. I remember I did a thing for them one time,

and they sent me the new game and I played like 30 minutes of it. And I was like, I mean, I'll make the video, but like, fuck, like who wants to do this? I don't want to add another 80 grand. If you want me to make it to the end of this Rough this is rough stuff Yeah, I'm not into it either I tried to play Assassin's Creed didn't care for but I like to bring it up because they've got that like black Japanese man in the shit in the game now and Stoked on that not so at all. He is not a real samurai. There you go

That's what hitman looks like in his ill-fitting suit. Oh no, Hitman's enemy has hit him with a shrink ray and we got this photo. We got this photo three seconds afterward. Looks like his first victim was his tailor. Yeah. Hello my friends, today we are not going to learn how to tie a tie.

What are you talking about? That's a Windsor knot The tie is fine I tied that knot Yes, I'm sure you did That's a double Windsor I'll have you know, there's nothing wrong with that tie Alright, it's a home at tie Hello, is this Men's Warehouse? What's the largest suit you have?

We were pre pressed for time. You know how hard it was to get those pistols? I was focused on the pistols and the bald cap. That was my job. And you can suit him. My job was acquiring two suppressed 1911 pistols and a bald cap. It was somebody else's job to make sure the suit fit. That ain't on me.

Were you a little annoyed that morning? You're like, are you guys fucking kidding me? cat. It was somebody else's job to make sure the suit fit. All right? That ain't on me. Were you a little annoyed that morning? You're like, are you guys fucking kidding me? I look like I'm wearing my dad's suit. It was way too big. Hello my friends. And today we will shoot guns as I shake my hands upwards to bring sleeves back down to shoot the full range. It's fucking terrible. It's fucking terrible. That is funny. I think I got like Jeremy in a squirrel suit at one point and I like strangled him with a garrote wire or whatever. Yeah, that was a silly fucking video.

His head kept falling off. Yeah. Good times. My mom didn't recognize me when I went to go see her with that get up on. She was like, yes, can I help you, sir? I was like, mommy, it it's me it's your son holy fuck shave your head oh my goodness son I didn't recognize you in that awful suit so bad so bad Jesus Christ before we join the next thing advertisement couple of wonderful sponsors. Lock and Load,

check it out. Get any products over at guerrilla mine.com with code pka or code jizz for 10% off. I just spoke to someone over at Guerrilla Mine today, earlier today. Lock and Load itself should be back in stock within the next month by mid-February and all the other products you can get discounts on. Wait, what month do you think it is? In October? Next month, mid-October, so like a month from now. Okay, you said February, right? I'm not crazy, am I? Oh, my mistake.

You're like, it'll be next month by mid-February. I'm like, what is it in Missouri? You're right, I fibbed accidentally there. It will be next month in October, my mistake. Okay, that's better. Good, so, but in the meantime, you can use the code for any of the products over there. Protein powders, weight loss drinks, supplements,

anything you need, get the discount. And also, you can see up there, PKA10, that is the merch. And so, check it out. Look at that. Uncle Kyle's Tranny Service. That's my idea. That's my idea.

That's my idea. I like Jackie's Horrible Chili That's that's my idea. That's my I like Jackie's horrible. Chicky chili cook off. Also my idea. I like that a lot. I like it. Yeah. Give yourself and all of the I'm stealing all of Zach's valor right now, by the way. That's okay. I actually drew this artwork myself as well. I, I, yep. Oh, blue shirt. Woody. Yes. Yes. Myself as well. I I'd yeah. Oh blue shirt Woody. Yes That shirt only comes in blue it's like

So check it out code pk10 for 10% off all of the merch is very high quality The hoodies are great. The t-shirts are great cups are great. All of it has passed muster and you will enjoy it Yeah, not one of those quality bullshit bullshit shirts that are gonna fade right away. That's not what we're doing I've washed the all both versions of the t-shirts and the hoodies I've had for I probably put them through the wash four times each now and 100% good still looking great colors are popping. So check it out Support the show. We appreciate it All right, hope everyone the audience is doing well do you buy a shirt I mean I hope they're okay but I don't really care that much you're not overly invested in it but if it's no impact on you

you're hope they're doing well yeah I mean I in general I hope you guys are doing okay but I'm not gonna put any time or effort into it you know I mean, I hope you guys are doing okay, but I'm not gonna put any time or effort into it. You know, I mean, I Every so often all like just recently I popped into somebody stream to ask an Elden ring question The guy was a subject matter expert and I was like, hey, can I play the DLC if I've only just played the base game? I've heard it's much harder and his answer was holy shit. Is that the real Woody's gamer tag? I get that and He's like I watched you all the time when I was a kid and it's like like, I'm like, holy **** Is that the real Woody's gamer tag? I get that and uh he's like, I watched you all the time when I was a kid and it's

like, did I ruin this person? He watched BKA. Now, I'm a pedophile just like you. People don't watch this show. That is a little troubling sometimes when someone will join the hangout and they'll be like, I'm 23. I started listening to you guys when I was 11 and a half.

And I'm like, not too much. Like were your parents involved? Like they, they doing, were they keeping an eye on your internet usage? Clearly not. We were the worst thing you were exposed to. Now we're actually wholesome. Just, just lads having a good time. Well, Taylor D DOS again. a while since that happened, right?

Classic Taylor before he gets back on here, depressing story. Yeah. One of my dad's friends going blind. And so my dad is taking him to his doctor's appointments. They're taking all day because there's so much wrong with it. They keep finding more stuff. And so dad's like took him that had to be at his house at 9am because we have to have him at the doctor's appointment at 1015. And I just sitting in the truck outside for three hours.

Then we go to the next appointment. Three more hours. I got home at 6pm at night. Guess what? Tomorrow we're going back. He's got gallstones Kyle He has gallstones now He's like I'm gonna have to call some his sister's gonna have to pitch in or that guy that you know We're not made it to Livonia. I guess it's 45 minutes each way. It'd be it'd be so so expensive You know and uber wouldn't even want to do it They they might not take the the thing because uber wants to go from like point a to point b Then get a new customer to go to see at point B, but this guy would have to go

From Athens or whatever it's out to Lavonia and then nobody in Lavonia is gonna hire him So he's just driving all the way back to find more customers. He's not gonna do that So he could get stuck out there, you know be out there. He could still do it. So I understand your economic. But at 6 p.m. when he needs to go home, they're not necessarily gonna be someone to take the, and he doesn't have that money. I don't use Uber much.

But I, okay, so that's different too. I usually have enough money for a cab. And it's like, all right, all right, I get it. This isn't profitable on the way back, but money talks, right? Like when I was in Mexico and I needed a ride from the airport to my Airbnb, they're like, yeah, you know, it's going to be like $500. And I was like problem solved right now. I got no I have a way to get to my place.

We had one like that one whenever that plane almost went down in Burlington, Vermont that we were on the uh, The driver that we hired it was like five or six hundred dollars to go from burlington up to killington But yeah, we'll just make that happen. But this guy needs It's not like he has one doctor's appointment. This would be that you would be adding a thousand dollars a day To his okay. It's getting to be a lot. Yeah. Yeah to his doctor bills, like, like, you know, and three times a week. So we're talking about like, now we're paying $12,000 a month and taxi fees, job for your father that he might not want.

He doesn't want it. He's like yesterday. It's so funny. He was, I talked to him yesterday about, and he's like, you know what? You don't leave a man behind today. After the third appointment, he's just like, I got to find somebody else to pitch in. How old is the patient? Oh i don't know 65 70 somewhere in there um lives alone

fucking like and he's one of those old men that's like hard to get along with he'll like get up he'll get offended and then like never talk to you again. So he's got feuds with like his brother with his sister. Wait a minute. You just proposed the problem, right? Or the solution. I mean, like your father needs to be like bad hair day, huh? I don't know. It's fucking sad though. If you see what sucked to go blind, I don't want to lose my sight. I expect it to slowly degenerate over time

and need to be corrected, but I don't wanna just like, oh, wait a minute. Oh, I didn't see you there. I don't want that macular degeneration or sometimes people will be swimming in the Amazon or whatever and get some amoeba in their eye and it eats their optical nerve. That happens.

Can you imagine being a normal person and having a fucking amoeba or something eat your optical nerve and now you're blind? I never thought I'd get old and I never wanted to get old. I never wanted to be this old and never thought I'd make it this long. But I am glad I'm alive. So what am I going to think when I'm 73? Am I going to be like, oh, I was mistaken. It's actually worth living. Or am I going to be like, what am I gonna think What if I live as long as my father? Well, I guess like like I don't know maybe that's getting morbid but but maybe you know when when he Permanently retires, maybe that you're going to come into some money as well, right? Maybe that's probably factored in as well, right? Inheritance, I mean that's possible. I never count on that. I don't know what sure not count on it, but like yeah

Nudge him every now and then We're good friends No, yeah, that's longevity is good though. Like I don't know how long I want to live I definitely want to live as long as I can see with my fucking eyes and like enjoy life to some extent I hurt my shoulder today. I can't oh, yeah, I can't I don't know. I lift the weights I can't I can't lift my fucking It's hard to explain it's in my rotator cuff and it's only when I twist my you know Your hand if I twist my, you know, your hand, if I twist my hand, if I'm supinated, I have no problem lifting my arm. And if I'm pronated, I have no problem lifting my arm. This is

extended straight in front of me. But if I make like a hammer and like, and it activates the shoulder in a different way. Yeah, sort of in the middle. It activates my shoulder or rotator cuff in a different way and then there's this like part of the motion that gets painful and Incredibly weak where the point where like I'll lift and then the arm will drop on its own I was like I can't like I can almost I could feel it's getting into it right now as I do this Well, what I go what are you doing that in just with the right? It was just after the whole workout I like oh, it wasn't like something that happened acutely during a motion

No, I don't know at what point it like started but like I also slept on it funny I slept like on my shoulder and it felt like it pushed the joint like in and then when I woke up I had to Like shake it around and like I think I've dislocated my shoulder a little bit or something I almost want to Mel Gibson slam it into the wall a couple times I've been I've been hanging from it and like jerking it and House and I also hurt my jerk in my arm Gripping it gripping it. Oh, no, he can't do a neutral grip. So he's I

Also hurt my fucking neck also hurt my neck man off day in the gym I Threaten 40 down I heard my neck like three or four days ago I sneezed I sneezed and I and like you know your head goes down really hard when you sneeze if you can Yeah, and and like I felt the back of my neck on the right side like Spasm and lock up and like it became so tight that my range of motion changed entirely I couldn't look left and right very much and I ordered one of those things off of Amazon that the chiropractor uses It's like a cervical your neck It goes around under your chin around the back of your skull. And it's got two handles and I'm laying on the bed and I'm like, I'm like,

go over it as like putting some slack in it. And then with both hands, like jerking, cause I, cause I, I can just feel that if I could just pull on my neck hard enough, I feel like that would fix it. And she couldn't pull hard enough. So I took the handles and I hooked them from my sex swing and I dangled from just my head, my whole body way. I'm maybe two Oh eight or something. I've done this whole body. Where did it go?

It felt really good. It felt really good. It felt really good. There was some popping and like once I was danglingling it felt intense and I was strangling myself for sure Like like I'm just I'm just dealing here. I'm keeping everything tight so I can stay conscious and not die You know, I'm not like dangling way up in the air I'm I'm I'm making myself dangled by like squatting like you do and you know when you're in the water But you'd like go down till yeah. Yeah, I'm doing one of those and

and and I start slowly adding some like rotation to it like sort of like circular rotation and i can feel it like pop pop pop pop it's like stretching my fucking spine out it felt so good my neck's somewhat better now dude kyle let me hit it back i had a similar thing where i so first first of all, I had seen Joe Rogan, Zach, if you could pull that up, I had seen Joe Rogan say that he loves this device. If it's not this exact one, it's similar. Like you get the idea, I know, sexy.

And Joe's like, yeah, he hooks it up to like his, above a door or something, and he pulls on his hand and he loves it. And I'm like, all right, well, I'm way more hardcore than that. I need to hang this thing off of my chin up bar so that's the direction I had yeah I hang the thing from a chin up bar it is not designed to do that if you hear like the fabric and the thread and the stitching coming out like uh-huh the velcro wants to give on mine but I double wrap it.

And it started out like a little bit sideways but and I just like Kyle said, I don't know how to put it into words. I just felt like it torsion is stretching and it felt like a little torsion pulling my head was the thing I needed. Unlike Kyle, it did not make me feel better. I went about four days without turning my chin from side to side after my little self chiropractic care.

Joe Rogan, you son of a gun. No, I liked it. I always enjoy that when the chiropractor does that, when he wrap a towel around your head in the correct way, of course. And when they tell me to relax, I feel like most people can't. They still a little tense.

I relax. I'm like, if you kill me, you kill me. But I'm gonna give you every bit of like relaxation. So like these joints go to where you want them to go. And when he jerks my fucking head away from my body, it's crock, this loud, crunchy crack. And afterwards I'm like, oh yeah That's good. Yes

Good. What is that? What like I've never been to a chiropractor for like a complete session, but I have had I Was at a paramotor event and there was a chiropractor there and he was doing like little adjustments like one guy after another And they offered it to me and I'm like you do you want it? I'm like yeah I really want it. I was just too shy to ask and he like did my jaw and my neck while I was sitting there. I felt lighter. I felt better and I don't believe in this stuff. I don't think that like cracking a knuckle repairs injuries or whatever but whatever it releases into my mind makes me feel happy and better. The sound and the feeling is incredibly satisfying and the real mumbo-jumbo comes in I guess sometimes. They'll

always pull my... I don't know how to explain it, but they'll basically show that one leg is longer than the other. They're like, see this one? This one's a little longer. And then they'll start like... Oh, see this issue. There's nothing we can do about it. Freak. You got a cam from 1993. That they, uh, but they, you know, they rearrange my hips, my whole back. They do this thing where they grab the skin, the loose skin on each of your

vertebrae and pull it up and Every time they pull it up in pops like like he'll grab like like the vertebrae beneath it is being lifted up and being like Adjusted so he'll grab these handfuls of loose skin going up your spine not in a painful way But as he but pulls them up, it's pop pop. I wonder if they can do that with everyone like you're a pretty healthy guy with It's pop pop. I wonder if they can do that with everyone like you're a pretty healthy guy with Enviable body fat and he can do it to you. What if you were really fat? What if you were 82 year old? I've had it done when I was skin was like paper thin Like just my way gentler. Yeah, no. Oh, yeah. I like the there's a entire YouTube channels It's just about cracking people's backs and neck

especially hot chicks backs and necks. Okay, so Chiropractor was basically boy toy boy shorts. I mean to say fucking hot man Lots of camel toe lots of camel toe lots of like cameraman knows his fucking job on the hottie back cracks But I'm all into the lingerie try on stuff. So that that takes my I'm not interested in seeing the hot girls get cracked and popped. I like seeing the animals get cracked and popped because that's the other side of the crack and pop channel. These, these guys like, you've seen me crack, crack hot bitches necks. You've seen me crack athletic necks today.

We're going to crack a horse's neck. And then the intro music plays and a montage of him him breaking people's necks and crippling them plays. But he gets to the farm and it's like, this is my old gal right here. Oh, she's her neck's bothering her though. Her movement's limited, the range of motion. And he's like, cracks the horse's fucking neck. It's so loud. What?

And at first I was like all right horses make sense then I see him doing cows I see him doing dogs cats I've seen them like like everything but a turtle really like all sorts of little he'll be a little bitty animal and he'll be like have his thumbs on their back going I've seen a dog get chiropractic treatment it is like first he doesn't like trust the what's happened to him like he's just been assaulted like why would oh wait oh I like this you know that you can see the dog or the same emotions that I do. He'll crack cats you know it's fucking crazy I like those a lot I think they're. Yeah the channel I think you're talking about I just found it. It's called the Animal Cracker. That's a different channel. You don't even want to know what that is. Oh, is this cow? It's all albino dogs.

I actually started watching your Townsend's YouTube videos. They do the old-timey cooking. I watched them do some recipes the other day. That is pretty entertaining. And I do like that. I would like to see a podcast with that guy or talk to that guy on our podcast maybe even because I'm curious about what... It seems like he lives the life of a... Does he reenact 24-7? Does he live like it's the 1700s? I don't think so, but I think he spends a good deal of time living. They dug out canoes. That's why I mentioned it there was a part where like they like made some weird beef thing from 1760 and then they like went down a river in a dugout canoe and and his buddies like way overweight wearing that period shit

So it's funny to see a dugout canoe in case you don't know you just take a big log and go to work You know, it's one piece that you've dug out and I know they made them. I know they made themselves piece that you've dug out. And I know they made them. I know they made them themselves. It doesn't seem like some YouTube cookie nonsense. That seems like someone who lives and breathes 17th century living. Dude, it's cool. His channel is awesome. It's fascinating. I like when you can tell that it's someone's like genuine passion like no part of him is not seemingly waking up in the day middle of the day and being like oh I gotta make a video about fucking hardtack from the 1700s like no that guy's stoked he's hardly sleeping the night before being like I can't wait to make

hardtack and I watched his hardtack video he's like, you've probably seen my nine other hard tag videos. I'm coming at it from a new angle. And sure enough, he's like, this is hard tack. It was called a ship's biscuit. And I'm like, tell me more. Fill me in. So maggots couldn't eat it. Seems like a good idea.

It was a really undesirable, hard kind of bread, but you eat enough of it and you start wanting it more than normal bread. Yeah, the salt pork episode, an excellent one. Because salt pork reminds me so much of like, because of Gimli, it reminds me somewhat of Lord of the Rings. And I just picture it as like, oh, this is a traveler's meal. You know, it's a salted pork is particularly. That's a nice little extended edition scene. They didn't keep in there before Saruman gets to show. Yeah, I saw a thing with Christopher Lee being upset that he had been cut out of the his death had been cut out of the main cut of the film.

And they're like, what do you think of the second film is or the third film is there? I think I should, I think I should be in it. Something like that. Where's my scene? I had this really like, what the fuck is he's kind of at a sour man, and in the extended version, um, they had an air, all the main characters, Aragorn and everybody ride up to his tower and there's water from the flooding that the ints did and they're like They have a talk and then Wormtongue stabs him in the back and that's the end of he spirals down falls and the

The Palantir falls out of his wizard sleeve and Wormtongue kills him. Yeah Cuz he like talks shit to work They're like up on the tower and he's like like said some mean-ass shit to wormtongue He said I can't remember what he said, but he's like fucking bitch and like like pimp slapped him and then turned his back to him worm tongue is like Then gets the knife fuck you dude tabs him. Yeah, how's he dying the book Taylor? He doesn't die in the book until like very late after the scourge of the Shire Yeah, where it goes because that's that whole extra plot point that they don't have in the book until like very late after the scourge of the Shire. Yeah.

Cause that's that whole extra plot point that they don't have in the movies at all where, yeah, it, it really, it's like a fun little addendum, but it's also like the pacing is off. It's like, we just had this huge colossal victory and now anything following that seems so much less threatening. It's like, Oh, you just defeated the dark Lord Sauron and all the armies of Mordor. And we're supposed to be like really worried about Marion Pippen in the gang having to fight off these Duna Dine Raiders led by a weakened Saruman.

Now, the 1980 US hockey team faced Sweden after defeating the Russians, right? Oh, that's a let down. That's not very exciting. You do that video games. Sometimes you've already beaten the main story big boss dragon And they're like, oh, I forgot about mug lug the pillager Buddy you still harassing that fishing village. Well On fire

Yeah, that's that's what it's like when I do all the side quests in Skyrim and I'm wearing the fucking wizards cloaks And I'm the king of the thieves guild guild I'm the best assassin in the land I've killed kings queens princes dragons and I show up in Whiterun and he's like my name is Yarl Balgraf who are you you stranger and it's like did you not see the the way I paralyzed everyone in your guard on the way in. Did you not see that? With a word. Yeah, and then I let you arrest me. I didn't have to do that. I could have done what I did the first time I played Skyrim, where I fought some guard at Whiterun. And before you know it, you kill so many people that now you can't complete quests there because

they're so upset at you. It's even more ridiculous because in the dialogue options, it cuts back and forth between your character's faces and then puts the buttons at the bottom. And it's like this goofball is like, how dare you stand before me? You tip straight when you tip you. Your life is in peril, sir. And it cuts back to me. And I'm I'm wearing a crown of heads or something.

I'm on fire like everything on me is like a has a name. It's like, oh, that's the gauntlet of fate and that's the sword of destruction. It's got the boots of envy and like, come on. Y'all couldn't write this into the game code that when they're like, hey, you're clearly a guy who knows a thing or two, so I don't have much to say to you, sir. But if you need any help from me, I'd love to help you. There is a dragon at Helgen. Can you assist us in destroying it? And it's like, I'm wearing dragon bone armor. Dude, I'm doing that right now in Elden. So I'm playing Elden Ring. The DLCs were difficult. And some days today, I added another remembrance boss to the pile of corpses behind me.

But yesterday I was like, this game is so hard. I'm going back to the base game, get a little ego boost. And, uh, mind you, I'm taking down gods, Debbie gods, giant dragons. Then I go back to the base game and I'm like, huh, here's a hairless ostrich. I never fought introduce you to my flaming great Katana. and it was just nice to boost my ego a little bit Yeah, you need that sometimes. Yeah good stuff But I think still grinding away on Tarkov I think it's all fucking like the PD is all fucked up like my quests one unlock can't get my cap I can't let my next light keep requests one unlock. It's such bullshit. It's like I'm brand new

No, it's fucking like year now or something. They've been doing this new in battle state world And when I go online and search my problems there'll be like a whole form of people. Yeah me too Battle state fucking sucks. They just abandoned us. What the fuck are you telling me the game's just broken broken like the end game stuff is locked out It just won't work for me It's real frustrating Well, at least you only put like 300 hours into it. Oh, yeah this this month I Think I know I don't know. I'll wait till they patch it at some point or something

I guess I got like 4500 hours in that game now I don't know. I probably need a new game. I know the the the Space Marine game comes out on the night. So that's like just around the corner. I don't know what today is Pve have a hideout. Yeah, everything's there except for other players In the game even the flea markets like it's it's you know It's other players selling the stuff that they got in the PvE raids do you crash stuff in the hideout all that like? Like I've been saying you so you do it's worth your time to craft stuff Oh well for quests and stuff, but not really to make money per se money is money's money's pretty easy to come by as you can

Imagine like once you get comfortable with the bots you could farm labs for like three million rubles a raid or something like that. And it's good practice. I used to be intimidated by the labs raiders, but the whole game is labs raiders basically because they replace PMCs with like intense AI that's roaming around the map with good weapons. And it's, it's, I thought labs was hard, but you know where they're going to be. They're going to be around the edges of the map up on that that perimeter When you're just running through shoreline or woods and you just bump into three of them They just melt you and spray you down. So it it's still fun. I like the PV a lot I just wish it fucking worked should fucking worked. Yeah, it's a reasonable expectation. Well, it's a beta Kyle It is a beta and I've only given them a hundred and fifty or sixty dollars

Dollars and you waited five years, but it's I'm not one of the true believers though. I didn't give them $250 that's what it says on the red That's what it says on the if you if you give them the two if you buy the two fifty dollar version your Your your dog tag and game says something about you being a true believer It's like is that a mark of shame amongst the community or no? It depends who you are. Landmark gives them Landmark has not purchased the shit

and he gives them a hard time pretty regularly. And when it first happened, he'd be like, here's a two hundred fifty dollar gamer. There's another two hundred fifty dollar gamer. Look, got a thousand dollars worth of the gamers here in my sick case now, the whole team of guys who'd spent the money. Um, but I don't know, I'm not going to spend that money, but I, but I will play the game and take up space on their servers. Fuck them. I'm going to play constantly and obsessively.

My podcast. Yeah. Hey, guess what? Well, you can't finish that game you bought, idiot. I'm going to go, then I'll wait patiently. What else is there? What else is there? What else is there to do? There's no reports. I put that Russian boot deep down my gullet. And I lick it and I suck it.

And I go, you take your time. And when you need more money you let me know I don't know what else it's a good fucking game. It's really fucking fun What do you say like like it's so cool to build miles on the fucking Tim pool patron clearly. Oh Man, I wish low-key make it a train, clearly. I'm here, right? Oh man, I wish I would take their money too. I'd take their money too. I would tell you all kinds of lies. Man, you just gotta understand, like, rush is the way. I don't believe the money.

It seems so high. Like okay, the total budget was 10 million, which I can kind of get on board with. I'm having a hard time. He was getting a hundred grand an episode four times a week they say. Ten million a run out quickly. Yeah that's that doesn't make sense like from an ROI perspective. I don't know what to make of this but like was he not paid for some of the episodes he shelled for them. I'm, I'm mixed, but no idea. Part of me is like, you scumbag, you hurt America for a hundred grand. And part of me is like, wait, a hundred grand four times a week. I mean, how much would I be hurting? Seriously?

If I don't take this money, someone else is gonna do it. You know, the thing about America, it's strong and resilient. It'll be fine. Right. Right. Take down America. Yeah, really not. But for 400 grand, I'll damn well try. I'll do my best. Like I always say, like all my values go out the window.

If I could just fuck it. 400 grand. They are. Yeah, they are. He wants to be true. AOC is mommy. If she needs me to like, I'll be the guy who empties the bucket of aborted fetuses. Like whatever you need me to do. Like, I don't care. Like I'm on board. Green energy.

Fucking like, like, like. Would you start saying Latinks? Latinx? Latinks? I didn't pronounce that. I think it's Latinx. Latinx. No,. I didn't pronounce Latinx. Latinx? No, it's not a fucking space program. It's... I say Latinx. I can't tell if Taylor Jokey, you didn't think it was pronounced. I'm being a little silly, but like...

Thank you, thank you. I'll be a little autistic. But Latinx, the first beater on the move. We anticipate to get our team north of the border by 2025. No sooner than 2025. Yeah, I don't even think we are so close. You just need 100 billion more dollars. I think we are not lying to you. I think that's some white lady bullshit. I don't think any Latins actually want to be Latinx. I don't think any human beings want to be referred to as Latin. Of course they don't that's fucking Liberal women stuff. No one actually I really don't like I bet the guy that cuts my grass

Hey, are you Latin X? Yeah, I do me well-meaning white guilt. That's probably what actual Latinos are like that's's no, don't. Yeah. Yeah. So you're, you're going to remove. If she wanted me to, if she wanted me to, I'd be Latin X. You'd be Latin. Yeah. You know what? I think you'd be a Latin King. I mean, I'd be a Latin queen if she wanted me to be like whatever she needs from me. I'm here to be.

Would you put dubs on your Camaro? Oh, I feel like, I feel like she'd want me to put airbags on there and like have it jumping and bopping, right? Right. Yeah. Yeah. I'm getting my bad financial decisions mixed up. Yeah. Yeah. That's the other team that wants to put the big old rims on there. They're classic rivals. Yeah. I mean, mean, we face them every year in the finals. Is she married? Nah, nah, nah. She's single and ready to mingle. She's just out there, big old ass, big old titties, just looking real nice.

I can't believe she's true single. I bet she is. Big old crazy eyes she's got. She's got some crazy eyes. She does. She gets a lot of those why do the eyes showing not like that someone needs to tell her and be like hey close his eyes a little bit no fuck that open them up wide I want to see them peepers she looks like a great white shark when it bites I don't know if I like that they close their eyes over white they do close their eyes when they're now they roll their eyes no they roll their their roll their eyes back and they cut that protective

Okay. Fucking Petey pedantic. I don't think that's right. Robert Shaw told me it was they roll over white. I shared that video with you guys in the, in the chat where the AI Trump speech into the Robert Shaw job. So I asked him, I said, what would happen if a very powerful battery fell in the water and it was close to me and I fell in the water, let's say 10, 15 feet, and a powerful battery like that, is it going to shock me? Or is the shark going to get

me? I'm just asking questions, trying to figure it out. And they just guess what they said to me. They said, we never had a question like that before. That should be an instant answer from a scientist. If some some guy, I know a lot about that. Oh, okay. Well, then why didn't they give him the fucking answer? Well, I think because they didn't want to humor him and go down a back-and-forth nor what if the entire story never happened That's possible, too You know, what is the battery just I think that most of those lithium batteries are more they're discharging They would probably discharge in the water

But there's not enough voltage to carry it on to another person something about the salinity of the water and the salinity of the human body Is also protective in some in some manner. It's gonna go around you I think interest but but mostly that battery is going to be exploding, you know Like like because they react really poorly with water, but not in a way that's like gonna blow you out of the water I just think the idea of being afraid of the battery getting the waters Your boat is sinking and you're in the ocean You've got a bigger fish to fry. It puts me in a really tough situation because I simultaneously want to think

Trump is so dumb for not knowing while also not knowing. And it's just like, that's so stupid. The answer is clearly, I guess I could have asked that I just thought it was a silly question to ask because like hey somebody's probably thought this out before it's it's it's like questioning something about rocket science like hey on the way back in how do you make sure that this nut doesn't happen you burn up and the rocket scientist is like yeah We account for that we have since Nagarin or whoever burnt up on the way back in 57

Yuri gagarin Is that the guy they showed his remains, you know, he went up knowing it was gonna fail but but he did it anyway because The soviets ordered him to go up and do this test or whatever and he's like it's gonna fail I'm it's death that you're ordering me to and like well if you don't go well this order like Petey over there that was the second guy's name Petey and yeah, Petey Patapov and Petey had a family so and and

So the other guy went up and they brought him back I guess they cracked the capsule open or whatever and he looked like a They brought him back. I guess they cracked the capsule open or whatever and he looked like a barbecue that you had left in the smoker for like two days. I've seen it. Yeah. They like they just like had Soviet officials surrounding him and he's just a crispy mess. That's what the bodies in my high school driver's ed class look like. They showed us a ton of car accidents to scare us and make us drive responsibly. Didn't work. Didn't work.

That's not going to happen to me. I was a teenager and invulnerable. Hey, do you remember spontaneous human combustion and how, oh my God, that was like a concern of mine with quicksand and other dress. So for those of you who don't know in the nineties, it became a real fear that you were going to spontaneously combust and just burn up. And what was happening is they would find a person in their hotel room in their home and there'd be a very localized

Fire event where the person was burnt to a crisp very hot fire But the surrounding area was either lightly damaged or not damaged at all and it would always be a mystery how this person could be lightly damaged or not damaged at all. And it would always be a mystery how this person could be having coffee, watching TV, and burned down through the chair into the floor. It looked like something from a sci-fi movie. What they found out is people fall asleep and die with cigarettes and a small fire starts.

And if you're fat enough, your body is basically a candle. So your fat starts rendering, if it's a slow smoldering fire, like polyester couches create, your body starts dripping fat and feeding the fire. And it burns low and slow for a long time as you slowly melt and fuel your own fire. And that's spontaneous human combustion. So were they all fat? Everyone who died was a big fat person? Fat enough to become like a lard candle, yeah. Yeah, oof. How fat do you have to be?

Not as fat as you think, unfortunately, Taylor. We're all at risk of becoming lard candles. I appreciate you guys including yourselves in that to make me feel better. All women are. Women are like 40% fat, right? I mean genuinely, like what percentage of a woman's body is fat, Zach? And also just one more time for the lulz, what's the average weight of an American woman? What did Dick Masterson say?

Like 172 or something? I think it's one seven. Yeah, plus or minus 175. That's the question to y'all. I think it's, I have 172 in my head. I've got minus on that for most. I. It's a good line though.

I don't know how to say this nicely. I just happen to know it's 185 for black women. Okay, well then they're raising the average. But there's not as many black women as white women, so it's not going to crank it up too much. So I think 172. So it's 40% fat, like I said, 39%, but who's counting? And what's the average weight of an American woman? Black, white, any color, don't care, just women. Real, with vaginas though. Yeah. Natural vaginas. The real ones. I apologize. I said black women were 185, they're 188. Oh my goodness. It's gotten worse than the last one. 170.8? 170.8? Very close. See, that's not bad. We're making progress. It was 172. Look at that, ladies. Yes, well done, girls. One pound at a time. That's how you do it. American men are so fat and we're losing to

American women in the fat-off. They've got an advantage. They start with higher fat content. It's like a head start at the race. Most of them is fat, as we advantage. They start with higher fat content. It's like, it's a head start at the race. They're most of them is fat as we saw, like it, it aspect of girl with big titties and big ass, like, like, it's a lot of fat. I'd have a big titties and big ass. Not that they'd be nice. They'd be gross. The beholder. Hey, we'd have amazing ass. If he, if he caked up,

if you put Woody on like a, like literally like, oh my God, I'd want to see him sit in one of them, sit in a cake like on the boys. I want to see that. I want to see the imprint he left. I'd be into that. Like you wouldn't be able to tell masculine or feminine from that. I just want to see him, a big old birthday cake.

And no, Woody's smooth back there like a cue ball. I promise you, he They go cake and no, what do you smooth back there? Like a cue ball? I promise you. It's like a turtle back there. It's smooth as ice. Like a baby. Oh, I know so. Would you put your Smooth turtle ass up against what I think we have equally like like like Femboy smooth asses I think we both do because we like ladies putting their tongues in there and stuff because we like ladies putting their tongues in there and stuff. I'm trying to get Dr. Disrespect's attention. I remember I told you, I told you dirty doesn't eat his girlfriend's butthole. He's easily like, y'all do that. Y'all eat buttholes. I'm like, yeah, yeah. But holes. Maybe he's afraid.

Do you consider that it's his girlfriend? I'd say you just go find a lady on the street against it. I'm not against it, but I'm just saying maybe you don't, but it's just like long time girlfriend that he's he's gonna marry. Right? Like the girl he's been with for like six years. You're not going to eat that. Go ball. You're a J you're a, you're a piece of shit. If you ask me, he's got a gamble. Somebody come along that will eat that but whole and it'll be,

it'll be all over. That's what I'm saying. I don't know that you'd want to marry a woman whose butthole you hadn't tasted What if you find out three years in it's like a penny I've heard people say it's like a 9-volt battery and I'm just like you're just telling me you've never licked a butthole Yeah, yeah y'all making that shit I hadn't thought about that. Yeah, I hadn't considered that. I had gone from that angle. I thought most people would like batteries.

We just thought he's like, that's a lie. Everyone's like batteries. Why fib about something so culturally accepted? Let's get a little taste. I mean, I definitely did at one point or another as a kid, put a battery on my tongue and it's like, oh, man, that's unpleasant. I don't like that. Oh, I thought you're eating buttholes as a kid. I was like, damn, your head will curve. I was a man grown before I ate a butthole. I was probably five

licking a battery. I wasn't sure where you were going with that at first. I keep thinking you're gonna say the other thing. Well, at least that's my memory. It doesn't count because it was my cousin. Oh my gosh. Well, it was a regular night and it was at my uncle's house and I drank some of his fun tea. And then I... You know, Michael Jackson called wine Jesus juice when he gave it to the kids. A little fucked up, huh?

And you still defend him. Such a good song. You're right. He deserves it. ABC. Come on. These are classics. They are good. ABC.

I have like when I'm playing Age of Empires or Age of Mythology, like YouTube has learned that I just like playlists where it's a ton of Michael Jackson and a ton of Elton John. Me too. Yeah, I like that I just like playlists where it's a ton of Michael Jackson and a ton of Elton John. Me too! Yeah, I like that shit. I feel like I'm losing in a game and then I'm still standing comes on. What's your favorite Elton John song? I'm Still Standing. That's a solid song.

I love it. I'm still standing. That's an excellent song. They're all good though. He's so good. They make some really good video game montages to that. It's like somebody taking all the damage. He's so good. They make some really good video game montages to that. It's like somebody taking all the damage. Everything's hitting around them. And they just keep going.

Especially Battlefield where you can med up. The world is falling on this guy. And it's, I'm still standing better than a half a dip. He's getting thrown around. He just keeps going against the wind. That guy's not playing Elden Ring. You get one shot in that game. Well, you know what? If I get one shot, I feel like it's not my fault.

Or like, what are you going to do? Sometimes you get shot. Here's what I hate. I hate when I get hit and then I get hit three more times while still staggered and not standing again. I consider that one shot. I will be and I never control it again. That's a one shot. Do they ever juggle you like like like like they do in Smash Bros where they like got you up in the air like looking over and over just somebody threw me a centipede threw me up in the air and swallowed me caught me with his mouth. Snakes

have done that to me. It's the thing I do. Yeah, I play with their food at all. I like I like rocket man and I like Leave on or whatever leave on lax's money Love that I my gym playlist is a bunch of like easy listening shit like that and if you like as close as it gets to like hard stuff is like I need a hero. He's gotta be strong and he's gotta be fast and he's gotta be fresh from the fight. You start doing a set right when it's right when that part starts and you'll finish that.

You'll finish that because she's in your ear. She needs a hero. He's gotta be strong. He's gotta be quick. Dude, 80s like I wasn't around for the 80s, but I love 80s music. It's so good. George Michael's dope. George Michael's dope. You know what I like on there? Like, cause it just keeps playing. Is it like Depeche Mode will come on? Oh yeah.

Personal Jesus and all that. And it's like, this is great. This music is so much better than what's coming out now, or at least that's my take on it. I like it too. I like it too. I really like the 80s stuff. I like all Elton John shit. I'll listen to the Disney songs I'll walk through the house fucking singing

All the Disney songs dude, the Milan one is as good as it gets Singing that shit all the time Walk through the house singing that one that was the time. That is a really good walk through the house. So you that one? That was dope. I listened to that. Like I watch like victory scenes and movies and stuff on YouTube a lot. And yeah, watching that to like, you know, them taking on the Huns or her. Yeah, it's Mulan. It's Mulan climbing that pole. I'll make a man out of you.

Is there going to throw out a camp for not for sort of failing to thrive. Yeah. And she's the one who's smarter to figure out. You like get that cloth or whatever and wrap it around the pole and climb the top to get the fucking coin or whatever. Meanwhile, they should they were like Mulan, this is a strength exercise. You know, I appreciate the stick to this and the thought. Yeah, but while they couldn't win through strength of numbers, obviously, because the huns were coming.

So that little aligot. Maybe a thinker out there. Maybe a magic dragon. Like I was at the age when that came out that like I had no concept of what a hun was, like what group of people, but I would see them in their nasty ways. And I'm like these fucking huns. I hope we'll on in the gang and especially the funny fat one, make it out. That's such a good Disney movie, underrated Disney movie. Yeah, yeah. And it's a girl power one, too, with with cross dressing.

So like you would think it would be a little wow. I hadn't I never looked at it through that lens, but you're totally right. Yeah. And there's that there's that fun scene where like she's super into like the Chad of the army and and he's just like this weak dude that I've got to like carry his water for him and She's like making googly eyes at him and then she I think he catches her taking a bath or something She's hiding her titties. That's good. Same. I think they remade it and made it like crazy woke I think they may maybe even made a live action version it was woke enough yeah it's woke enough it's a cross-dressing uh asian lady winning the battle like like let's just

let's just leave it where it is yeah i mean i didn't even think about it as well i think it's pretty great cuts her hair off and everything at the at the beginning i think if the original movie was released now the culture people would hate it. Like, I want to say the right, I'm trying not to follow the, well, they did. That's what happened. Um, but I thought it was a good movie. I always loved it as a kid and the message is real. Like her father was going to have to go fight and die and she's like, no, I got this and like cuts her hair off and does the whole thing.

Her father was a more capable warrior than she was. I think I mean she won the war Woody. Well, there's a little luck involved. She helped. You know, that was a really convenient avalanche, I'll say that. She created it with a rocket, and she had magical creatures that apparently only worked for her. It's not like that magic dragon or whatever. Oh, I forgot Eddie Murphy. Eddie Murphy was there. Eddie Murphy's everywhere. You Murphy, you ever see that show, The PJs, back in the day? Eddie Murphy made a show called The PJs,

it was claymation. It was ridiculous. It didn't last long. I hate claymation so much. Really? It's all about the setting of that. What about the old commercials for ice tea? Remember those?

They'd have a claymation, old blue eyes singing songs and drinking that can drinking that cante It sounds somewhat familiar, but I remember that producer guests that use like every form. It was like live action animation Yeah, our worst guest ever He's far and away the worst at least the other ones like brought content with them speaking of worst ever the other ones like brought content with them. Speaking of worst ever, was that guy, so we had a hangout last weekend and there was a new guy who came to play code words.

He barely ever spoke, he misclicked all the time, he didn't participate in the game verbally and he just messed up turns. We asked him if he was high and then very kindly asked him if he was mentally disabled in some way. He said neither. Was he trolling us or does he not know he's mentally disabled? I genuinely didn't know if he was trying to ruin the game or if he was like stupid.

But his job was being a dealer at a casino. So you'd think he'd be very good and Timing and games and rules. It's his job to enforce them and play by them So that made me think he was probably just trolling us, but I didn't want to like Kick him out for if he'd done it one more time, but he was either playing the game so despicably bad that that He did he played it so despicably bad it ruined the fun for people and I was like hey man You can't do that again. This is it. That's your last chance Yeah, it's not like I take code words all that seriously what I take seriously is I want to let in the blood out, baby

Yeah, I want everyone in the room to have a good time. That's really what I'm doing there Yeah, and I felt like he was a game I'm pretty sure it's a game. You come to play pissy pants. We'll see what happens. It was, you'd be like, all right, don't click guess on this next one. We're all going to talk about it. And then the clue would come in and immediately just, yeah. What was the clue like, it was like something and he said Yellowstone or I yeah The Falconer one was hilarious because it was like Bird Hawk was there and he said Yellowstone Falconer or something anyway, he was either trolling us or he was he was an idiot and you don't want to just assume someone's trolling You just because it's our group. So it's more likely there. They're an idiot for a while

Yeah, we got a lot of idiots in there and a lot of like heavy drug users wouldn't not judging but it's like hey, man Oh, yeah, you sober right now because I know how it could be Maybe you don't realize you're ruining the time for 21 people and everybody's like no, we're good I'm like, well you're ruining my fucking time Hang out on drugs is culturally appropriate for the event. Yeah, we like to use them. Everybody, everybody like cracks open their fucking bongs. I'm reaching for mine, but I can't find it.

No, it's not there. Everybody cracks in your head because you're in. I can't go there. I don't know. You can't turn your head. No, I turn it. There's something I don't know. You can't turn your head. No. You can turn it. Look at that. I stand corrected.

My bad. You think that's crazy. Watch this. Yeah. Oh, you're right. You're a gym man. Hey, hey, hey. Something happens up there.

Something happens right there. Look at me. Give me my peepers right on it. Ah, no, no, you can't come with me. Sideways out. Possibly see it coming. Turn around like a video game character and orient your whole body. No, it's pretty fucked up.

It just, it only hurts to be at the right spots. Um, I'm sure it'll heal up. I've done this before, like, like muscle spasms where something locks up and gets all fucky. I remember one time I was drying my hair too aggressively. This is a few years ago. Y'all like that one, huh? That was one go about that. Did you go to a car wash? Like my hair is long. Like it would cover my nose right now. Like it's like going down. Can you make it? No, once I push it down, it won't go back up.

You're going to look like that goth Spider-Man. It comes down to here. I look like Tobey Maguire when he was the bad Spider-Man walking down the street, like clicking his fingers. It's bad. It's super long. It covers my ears. I haven't had a haircut in like three and a half months or something. It's hard. Anyway, what was I talking about with this? Your neck injury and your aggressive hair drying. Oh yeah. So like, I really go fun. Who hasn't been there?

I really go after it when I dry my hair, you know, it was a lot of lots of stuff. I, you know, I have this thing when I don't like, I like to, I like to get ready as fast as I can. I race every time and I try to do things in the right order. So I'm going to hurt. I'm autistic too. I get it. Yeah I try to do things in the right order. So I'm going to hurt. I get it. Yeah. This is part of my 40 year old guy stuff. It bothers me if I inefficiently get ready for the day. So I of course lately put my creams and moisturizers and put my nails in the right order every fucking time. Leave it alone. I get clean. That's all that matters. So like, I don't know, I was like going to town on my hair like like drying it off. And all of a sudden he went in like, like locked

up to the point where like, I can't move without excruciating pain. It's like if I turn it too far either way, it's like pinching and pulling. And yeah, it that usually takes a week or two to heal up. It's it's super annoying. If I sleep wrong wrong It'll do the same thing to my neck. My neck's all usually fucked up I need to see the chiropractor more do you think now that I've got this dangler and in my Yeah, clearly it works Do you think is an injury that's getting re aggravated? Mmm, I don't think so. No, I think my shoulder is my shoulder is definitely an injury that gets re aggravated because I've heard it A lot doing overhead presses

I think like I've done overhead press machines before that put me in a weird position And like tweaked it somehow or maybe probably something torn in there slightly or misaligned I know, you know a lot about weightlifting, but my shoulders hurt me and I do much better with dumbbells if you want to yeah Oh, yeah, I did that's you're absolutely right like like dumbbells would allow you to be in the Correct range of motion every every time but at the time I was I was doing going really really heavy and there was an overhead Press machine there that I felt was safe But it could my shoulder if I don't keep everything I feel like I can like flex and keep all the keep the joint tight You know, I mean like the same way you can your knee maybe

All the keep the joint tight, you know, I mean like the same way you can your knee maybe Yeah, like I can like keep the joint tight together But if I relax it can kind of like get loose and it feels like it'll pop it It genuinely feels like it's gonna come out of joint like multiple times. Sometimes if I tweak it wrong, I've definitely felt it like Felt like it like was about to pop out I've done them my knee before too. I feel like my joints are weird. I've done it with my knee before too. I feel like my joints are weird. I've twisted my knee in a way before where it felt like my knee was just on the edge

of completely popping out. Do you have a diagnosis or something for flexibility? Yeah, the finger thing. Yeah, yeah. The swan neck deformity where the ligaments are extra long. So this just keeps going. And I used to be able to like bend all my fingers back to my palm. My thumb still goes back to like all the way back.

I can bend my fingers to my palm. Just the other way. The other. Yeah. That's not your pop. Oh, that's not my palm. I meant the back of my hand. All the way back. Being an asshole. It hurts. It really does. Earlier today and last night learning and reading about like the sideshow freak acts of like the 1800s and learning about their life.

There's this one guy, Here's a picture Zach. You can show him lobster boy was his name. Who he's number one on this list of the 20 most iconic sideshow entertainers of all time. So you may know this character was featured in the American Horror Show episode about freak shows. Yeah. So this guy has something called ectodactyly, which means his fingers and

his toes are like pincers and this guy was obviously a freak and they would take him around and his whole family had like this genetic thing, like most of them did. So he was like a fourth generation since the inception of this thing and he was just i guess the first one to take off as a freak his whole family had it like i wonder if his mom and dad are also his uncle and aunt i don't know i didn't live that deep in the in the show the lobster boy made a part-time living you know like a tupperware party where you'd have a lot a bunch of married gals like over in a living room he'd do a Tupperware party where you'd have a lot a bunch of married gals like over and in a living room

He'd do a Tupperware party where he took you in the back bedroom and finger banged you to a ridiculous orgasm because he's like the master of it with his lobster finger because he's got like a big giant finger like this That was a good season of American Horror Story. There's that's one of the two-headed this guy's based on and I was reading about this guy's personal life, and near just a little bit. It turns out it's a great, great chance. He's really good at it. Yeah, that was a big part of the Wikipedia page. According to Grady's father, the Stiles family had a long history of ectodactyly dating back to 1840. Grady Stiles Jr. was the

fourth child of Grady Stiles and wife Edna, capitalizing on his deformity. He was a sideshow attraction at a carnival. He also couldn't walk. So he was crippled. Not crippled, but his feet don't fucking work right. Immobile. He was having to like, immobile. Good. Yeah. He'd have to like, crawl around. And this is what it says about him later in life. That guy we're just looking at. Yeah, he'd have to like crawl around. And this is what it says about him later in life. That guy was just looking at styles was an alcoholic and was abusive to his family. Due to his extra actually, he was unable to walk. While he sometimes used a wheelchair, he most commonly

used his hands and arms for locomotion. He developed substantial upper body strength that when combined with his bad temper and alcoholism made him very dangerous to others. Grady's first wife, Mary Teresa, left him to marry Harry Glenn Newman, a little person who was billed as the smallest man in the world. Wow. I don't know if you have that much mobility problems, you better be nice to me. I'm not going to get back with a stick motherfucker. What are you going to do now? Motherfucker. What are you gonna do now? You're using a stick and you're walking backwards slowly. His ultimate counter. A whip.

What are you gonna scuttle over here? That's funny that this guy was ambling about so much and so often that he developed a strength so notable, they put it in his Wikipedia article that made him a real threat, a real, a real world beater. But yeah, that sucks. That poor, poor man, at least as a kid, seems like he didn't become that great of a guy. Did you want to build him as a lobster boy? Compared to some of the other ones on the list, he isn't too bad. Uh, at least you still have like hands and stuff. Like you can, you can not real hands, but like he can grab stuff.

Those are pre hence. I like suck at Mortal Kombat. He wouldn't be good at video games, but he died long before that. He's getting a lot of hot keys. I saw a guy playing Tarkov. I died in 1992. That seems to so recent. Ooh, that's like Picasso dying in 75 or whatever it's it's like what yeah, that is weird

You always think he's from a long time ago. There was also this woman named Schlitzy Who was or not woman looks like a guy they dressed as a woman who had microcephaly And man, they were people were fucking mean pinhead thing, right? That was the pinhead thing, yeah. And she was like, he was like a cultural icon, I guess, of the early 1900s. Everyone's like, oh, that's Schlitzy, the lovable retard who- Have you ever seen the movie, Freaks? No.

Do you know of it? I have heard of it, yeah. It's a black and white film from- Is that the one that's like, one of us, one of us? Like at that little table and they're like dancing around might be yeah um i've never seen it either i've seen clips of it i found it deeply disturbing it's uh about freaks there you go that's a clue that's a that's from it yeah now if zack it's really it'll be interesting now can you show me the pinhead from american

horror story and and show how much he looks like the real pinhead from light? It's crazy. Well microcephaly is what they have and everyone who has that kind of has that same Same gist same. Yeah Yeah, I think they got real microcephaly people. Yeah, there you go for the for the show I guess not though because she doesn't like she or maybe I don't think so. Man, that's there was two of them in the show. There was a that's the girl. Obviously, there's a guy as well. They were like a couple of pinheads. Yeah, yeah, there's the other one in the show on the left versus the one on the right. Yeah, the yeah, you can tell the left person has like an actual skull. Like that was one of the better seasons of that of that series, American Horror

Story. There's, there's a few seasons that are really good. There's one called Roanoke that's got Kathy Bates in it. I like Kathy Bates a lot. She's good. A couple like moves into a too good to be true house in, um, wherever that Virginia, wherever Roanoke happened at. And it's like the house is haunted, the land is haunted by a different thing, but there's also like a family of cannibals who live like a couple miles away in the woods

who want the property. Like everything you can imagine is scary there. Like, we're not dealing with one ghost. We're dealing with hundreds. It's like the Native Americans are after, Native American curses. It's pretty gory and gruesome that season. There was a couple parts that made me, that show's really good at making me feel uncomfortable

of such horrific things happening to people that I'm upset about it, like being tortured or disfigured. There's a movie called The Elephant Man that I haven't seen, but have you, that's apparently very good as like a freak movie. Have you seen that the old elephant man, like, like the black and white 1980. So David Lynch film, the elephant man, Merrick, the elephant man who had like those big protuberances all over his skull. Like, I don't like stuff like that. I don't like disfigured people or freaks.

They upset me. There's a Mel Gibson movie called like, I can't remember, but half his face is melted off and he's like a recluse that like meets a young boy and like gets to know their mother. And it's like even seeing Mel Gibson's fake half face melted off is like off putting to me. I don't like that. Yeah, I don't like I don't like this figured people in real life too. I don't I have a in-law who's got like a birth defect where like he's got he doesn't have lobster hands but they ain't right. What's wrong with them? Like missing fingers? Like like extra they're all missing fingers on both hands and they're weirdly shaped and

like some of them have fingernails and some of them don't and I just remember as a kid like mom would be like yeah, we're going over to so-and-so's place. I'm like Like you can hang out with so-and-so. I'm like mom I'm afraid of him. I'm like I'm scared of his hands. I don't want to touch him like everyone like it grosses me out I'm like, I don't like being I don't like't want to touch him like everyone like it grosses me out I'm like, I don't like being I don't like looking at him like his face is all messed up, too Oh his face looks like you like twisted a little like like something like that and I'm like don't do this to me Don't make me go. I was like I I'm not I'm not gonna be mean to him

I'm just gonna suffer through being around him. Was he your age? Not like a year or two older. OK, so it's like, it's like, don't do this to me. And I go, she was like, yeah, you don't have to go. I didn't know that. I was like, it's freaking me the fuck out. I was like, I don't want to shake his hand every time I go over there. I'm like probably 12 or 13 at this point, maybe 14. But I was like today, I remember one time I got introduced with a business guy and nobody told me the

motherfucker had a flipper. It's like his millionaire who like runs some gun shit in Florida that I'm meeting and nobody warned me homeboy has a flipper. One flipper or two? I don't remember genuinely. I think just one. I think his right hand was the flipper. You know it was like like like That's the one you'd shake. Yeah, yeah and you know I fucking grabbed his flipper and shook the shit out was it just one big piece of meat here where they're like like i i remember it being like all four fingers like together and then a thumb or something something we but but then

these were like all kind of weird he had a flipper he had a little it was bad but but i shook the shit out of his hand but but i was like why why did nobody warn me? We was meeting that flipper-handed man today. I could have like, steeled myself before the meeting. I'm not prepared. That would take me by surprise. Yeah, I don't like the forums people. I don't like looking at them or being around. And you wouldn't have liked these freak shows.

No, I don't like the freak shows. Not only were they gawking, they also, all of them seemed to have horrible and tragic lives outside of their career. How would they not? How would they not? Even the guy with the stretchy skin? I don't know.

Sharpay man? Stretchy skin? Yeah, it went poorly for him. That's James Morris, a genetic condition called Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, which causes the skin to be extremely elastic. He could stretch his skin up to 18 inches in length and tour the Parliament Bailey during his lifetime Don't show a picture of that Zach. Yeah, he's like, yeah sure. It doesn't look too bad. What is this weird stuff you think?

It looks like his skin is normal. I bet he could throw his foreskin like over his shoulder Oh, yeah, you can make a lasso do some weird shit with it tight It looks it looks like this not out unlike all the other freaks It seems like this guy could just will not stretch his skin, it seems like this guy could just not stretch his skin and then go to the grocery store and be fine. Right. It was like a feat he was doing. I was going through your list, thinking about which of these deformities I would pick.

An elephant man there. Stretchy skin over this guy. Stretchy skin for sure, this is horrific. You don't want to be an elephant man? I don't want to be an elephant man. This guy is like actively hoping. his ears got his ear got turned horizontal from how much stuff that is going on He keeps it close to the ground. He's always uh, yeah, he's got his finger on the pulse And he's not even like balding. It's just so much extra skull came out that

myself with an extra big gun, you know, some people have big foreheads and that's fine True and I understand that but Man that's too man. I'm goddamn Over here you traumatizing me with this wolf boy this guy doesn't it I used to roll when I was a kid bro Look what wolf man is wearing that look he did not let his wolf man shit get the best of him He is styling and profiling. He looks like a fucking Matador he looks like a wolf man matador like he's about to go out on the town and slay some pussy with his hairy wolf dick I wonder how much of that is growing from his face and how much of that is like imported from the top of his head

Apparently based dude. It's on his face. Yeah, he had hyper trichosis Which causes abnormal hair growth all over the body During his career the hair on his face was eight inches long and the hair everywhere else was four inches long on the rest of his body The only place he didn't have hair were the palms of his hands and the soles of his feet Yeah, you fixed that today. Yeah shaving No, you get electroly lot. I did that forever There's a movie I can't remember but the lady has wolf voice wolf lady syndrome, but she's smoking hot I can't really actress but they did full-body electrolysis to make her make her smooth

So does she have to do that all the time like every night semi-permanent, you know, it lasts for like years They grab each hair individually send a pulse to kill the root and then pluck it so it's it's pretty permanent electrolysis is Yeah, glad I'm not a wolf boy or an elephant man and frankly glad I'm not all that stretchy Oh my god, the the one of the worst one of these have to be the bottom two That are two different kinds of human torso. Oh bottom two that are two different kinds of human torso. Oh, it's randian born in 1871 Prince randian had tetra and medleia syndrome, which is the absence of all four limbs. He appeared in 1932 film freaks and one of his most famous tricks was rolling and lighting

cigarettes with his lips. He performed with Barnum and Bailey staying in the side show until his death in 1934. I can't roll a cigarette with my hands. Good. Look at that guy. He's miserable. That sucks. Please wipe my ass. Please stop wiping my ass. Please side You know more than necessary Just constantly nodding toward the wet wipes my pocket to be a letter yet another She needs hands she was a singer which I guess what else are you going to do? Nah, she's a stenographer. Yeah, these court cases are impossible to go through. Clack, clack, clack.

That's how it's going to be. Of all those freak deformities, those human torsos have to be the worst. I want to know what's downstairs. I bet just normal. Right. I bet. I was without legs. I think it's full of sawdust.

Yeah. She's been leaving a snail trail everywhere she goes. The house. She's got quarter wheels. That's put her in a little red, white or red. What is it? Those are wagons. The red rider. Radio flyer. Radio flyer. That's what it is. I'm not comparing him to freaks, not comparing this gentleman to freaks, but I watched this disabled gentleman on Twitch playing Tarkov with his mouth, playing Tarkov with his mouth.

Was he good? He's killing shit. I mean, that's good enough for me. Like he was sniping shit. He's like, I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that.

I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. playing Tarkov with his mouth playing Tarkov with his mouth. Was he good? He's killing shit. I mean, that's good enough for me. Like he was sniping shit. He's like he was in a hard part of the map. He was in Lighthouse at the water treatment plant sniping out of a window just to get there is annoying for me. So like this dude and he has like three or four like little sensors in his mouth and he's over there like,

well, I can't talk out with his mouth and winning. I was very impressed, dude. I'm watching Elden ring content on YouTube partly to learn about the game. Half of being good at Elden ring is like understanding how the different talismans and stuff work together to strengthen your character or whatever. And I'm struggling to beat these bosses with a controller and then this fucking bitch in her tight little Sports bra and boy shorts beating it on a dance dance revolution pad How are you doing this but she did it Wow, that's I don't mean to call her by name she seemed fine She just jumped after every victory bounced around. Hell. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, this sounds like good content to me

Bounced around hell. Yeah. Yeah. I mean this sounds like good content to me I would I would get I would get a hot girl to do the dance dance thing But really I'm just over there on mouse and keyboard off camera. It's just just owning Like that's the move right you can see her feet. She's doing the thing, you know Yeah, but I don't know what a fucking dance step is supposed to translate to in the game. You could lie to me Yeah, I guess she could just dance around over there and you can show me a character kicking ass and I believe But I don't know what a fucking dance step is supposed to translate to in the game. You could lie to me Yeah, I guess she could just dance around over there and you can show me a character kicking ass and I believe Some people are good at Elden ring some people are like I Don't know. I don't know how you get so good at it that you play it with like a guitar hero

That's that's different level of gaming. That's the drums Yeah, or the drums anybody who plays it without like normal hardware is is fucking crazy I don't know how people do that or why they devote their time to it I don't know why people watch it. Frankly, I watch it for like five minutes I'm like cool didn't know that was a thing. You've clearly put spent a lot of time doing this Not watching more though. Like I wouldn't watch hours if somebody's dancing I mean the girl with titties bouncing could hook me for a little longer. But yeah, yeah I don't care that you can play the game with a drum set. I'm just sort of intrigued by it, I guess that

And I'm trying to learn and I'm like, well, like what weapon did she choose? Like this is obviously playing the game on hard mode if you're using a dance dance revolution pad so Like this is obviously playing the game on hard mode if you're using a dance dance revolution pad So uh like how did she set up her character to be op? At the time I watch it. I was too new to understand. I might get more from it now. Yeah. Yeah Yeah, I'm I'm definitely gonna play that fucking space marine game that thing looks cool to me I don't I don't think this is one of their woke titles. I don't think there's any Do you know the night like I think yeah, I've seen gameplay. They've been letting creators upload like 40 minute segments of it It looks real good to me. There's like multiple classes. You can like decide if your space Marines

It's too many teams, right like PvP. I think so. I think they do. No, it's PvE It's it's like a story driven mission where you're Basically exterminating all the aliens on this planet that have invaded it It's a human planet that's been invaded by by eight by tyrannids and you're just you're fighting them off Playing as this Titus guy It comes at the ninth like I said, it's a warhammer title. Mm-hmm. I didn't know that Yeah, you're like the space marine space marine like the giant superhuman Man soldier guy all jacked up in your suit kind of like vermin tide Yeah, I've seen it's not it didn't look like waves and waves and you're definitely more overpowered than vermin tide depending on how you get

Your character you can be like a machine gun guy or a shield guy or like whatever. I'm sure but You're fighting lots of enemies and moving through a bigger single-player world. Yeah it's co-op. I'm gonna find somebody to play it with. I'm pretty excited for it. I like the world so much but I have like swear to God when they when they made the female custodies when they added that woke shit to the game I unsubscribe from all of those YouTube channels that I used to watch Every day every day I would go because there were female characters Yeah, I'm not gonna go into it again, but they're not supposed to be female

They change the war and choose female when you play. This is a lore discrepancies a lore discrepancy Established for literal decade. It would be like if they made the orcs not evil in Lord of the Rings. It would be that level of active and insistent spitting in the face of the original artist. Yeah, I don't know. It's like, oh, by the way, Cortana's a trans woman, by the way. You didn't know? And it's like, no, I didn't know. I thought she was a hologram AI in my head with a pussy Sexy pussy as you always was

That irked me so much that I mean, I'm gonna play a fucking video game though. I'm sorry But I won't but I don't I used to listen to the little every night I used to like Luton I used to go to his channel and I mean like two hours of lore Luton, I used to go to his channel and I mean like two hours of lore videos at a time like this long story about made-up shit in the future and I'd be like yeah taking notes okay okay I remember this character and I just completely lost interest in all that lore shit when they decided to do that it just without going into the nerdy nerdy lore of it it It's silly. And it had been well established that like, only a man can survive the process to become a space marine. But now like the custodians are like what a space marine is to a human, but they're that to a space marine. They're

like the uber uber elite who like protect the Emperor's life. They're like the secret service that they always keep in reserve, no matter how bad the battle's going. They keep them in reserve to protect the Emperor's body because he's laying there defenseless. They talk about how fast and powerful and ridiculous they are and it's always sounds like they're talking about Superman. You know what I mean? When they talk about how if their reflex is dull by even a 10,000th of a second, this could happen in their 400th or 500th year, then they are sent to the reserve squad and it's just like you don't make the cut anymore because your Your reflex is slowed by a ten thousandth of a second. Okay, cool. That's badass

But then they're like, I don't know they gave them all pussies for some reason. I checked out Yeah, fair enough. Not me. I'm still into it. There may be more into it Yeah, there is some like the animation at the porn anime of like the custodies now is like these big butch bitches It looks like linebackers with pussies Not even attractive maybe a little body hair they go back and forth with whether they're attractive or not I think the the people like me who are like annoyed with it They're like this is part of lore and you should accept it and they like make the weirdest fucking like lady Custodies naked the people that are always the most

make the weirdest fucking like lady custodies naked. The people that are always the most insistent on those sorts of changes to like lore based fandoms are like never actually into it. Oh I mean they're going the other way. People who are like me who don't like it are like oh you like it do you? Let me rub it in your face a little see if you like it then. What if uh yeah I guess their pussies would look like this huh? I guess they'd have to be built like this to fit into that suit huh? Weird. And they're like this is lore lore now. This is canon now. Get with it, right? Right? Oh, yeah. They're like, yeah, I guess they'd have weird titties like that. It's always a bad idea when these IPs make critical changes for people or at the behest of people who aren't even into their hobby anyway. Oh see that is not a good example

That is that supposed to be a female custodians. No. Yes. No, they're gigantic They'd be this would be a this is like a nine foot tall person or some shit. They'd be super wide as well Anyway, it's the nerdiest thing. I'm into I think the Warhammer stuff. They're all pretty hot like that It's like nerdy than Star Trek for sure They're all pretty hot like that. It's like nerdy than Star Trek for sure Yeah, yeah, this is again, this is just not even Everybody wants female Astarte's baby heard of female custodians yet yet. No, that's not what they look like How did you not know it's not what they look like is what they like that

Speaking of games that are incredible and don't have any woke stuff, Kyle. Age mythology? Age mythology? Age mythology is incredible. They did such a good job making it. It looks good, it plays really well. The balance is a little off. It seems clear that there are some gods that are just way better than other ones. They haven't tacked through all that yet because they made a lot of changes.

Oh, imagine that. Yeah, not yet, but they'll get to it. It's kind of fun having a little more disparity in the power because AOE is so well balanced and aimed to timings and strategy that AOM is a lot less intensive because you can auto queue stuff. So you can just have your town center creating villagers or you can have your barracks creating hoplites or your temple can auto create, you know, minotaurs or cyclops or whatever you have. It's so much fun. It's faster paced than Age of Empires.

The games are quicker. It's all about early aggression, seemingly. I'm still figuring it out. It's so fun. It's so deep. There's like, it's like a total war, the amount of unique units they have in this. And every time you go through, it's like, do I want to use Athena as my secondary god and get Minotaurs and get restoration for my units as a god power? Do I want to use Ares in the classical age and get bronze armor magically added to it? And then I get a Cyclops that picks up enemies and an animation and like bites their head off and throws them. Or it's so, so fun. You would like it if you gave it a shot. No, I just don't think it appeals to me anymore. I don't know if I like that gameplay loop.

I don't want to do the memorization of the build orders. I don't want to like, I don't want to, I just don't play. I'm not memorizing any build orders for Age of Mythology. There's so much to know. At some point I will, but it's one of those games where in StarCraft or Age of Empires 2 even, the meta is known. The builds are very honed. If you want to compete, you have to do specific things to an extent. There's some like builds that break the meta. Age of mythology, there's like no set meta.

So like you can go and play and discover like a new build, a new way to play, like a strategy that someone hasn't done yet. My autism won't allow me to enjoy that. I really like doing things with the most efficient meta. But it's fun to figure out like, oh, I hit this age faster this time and I have more units. Yeah, there's this part of me who's thinking like I'll never figure it out as fast as the whole community will working together. I should sit back and wait.

I genuinely would feel like I'm wasting my time building soldiers inefficiently. While I'm wasting my time period playing the video game, I need something that's got a different kind of gameplay. I don't know. I like a grind. I like a grind and I like a story and it doesn't really have any of those things. I like starting with my shitty sword and I also don't know about the top. Just RTS in general or strategy in general. I don't know if I want to do a top down thing. I really like role playing and not role playing games. And, um, I like the quick cycle and like, like a game might take 20 minutes and like I'll play the whole game, get through the, you know, all the ages, get to try different units and then I either win or I lose.

And then I get to go back in the lobby with my friends and like, I'll pick a different one. Oh man, Thor was kind of fun. I wonder if ISIS is good or if Ra is a fun time or Thor or whoever. I wish I could get some people into like Mortal Kombat or something that are bad at it and we could learn together. But you want to talk about min-maxing and like memorizing stuff. Those fighting games have to do that too, but there's not as big of a payoff. I mean, I don't know. I get to beat you up with like Terminator or something. That sounds cool. Yeah, but I get to send Minotaurs to eat your you wouldn't know what any of the moves were. That's true

You'd see me doing my Terminator combos and making quips and you like I I don't I don't get that one Well, I would yeah, I'd make it a nice easy experience for you. I'd send my hop lights to defend your little baby Well, I don't want that either. I hate that god. I hate hand people People hey Kyle, do you want all this? No, I don't want all of that. God, I hate handholding. People will say, Hey, Kyle, do you want all this? And I'm like, No, I don't want all of that. That would ruin the game. All right. Well, then I'll go whole hog one v one. I would prefer that. Honestly, that's what I would want. Like, if I were going to play, I would want you to like decimate me. I'm not good enough at AOM to like,

like if you started playing right now, by the end of the night, you'd probably be at a similar level that I am. Not quite. Okay. You wouldn't, that's fair. You wouldn't. Cause I know the mechanics from AOE. And I have, I wouldn't have been training in darkness for six months with bros. How great would that be? That wouldn't upset me. I'd be like, Oh, you're going to play the game. I like, you know, what actually would upset me about that. If you did that, I would be like, I played one playing and you didn't play with

me. You have your first game. Cause he goes easy on you. It doesn't know that you're a pro. I play one game and I'd like stomp. He'd be like, are you juggling the pit? My pigs? Are you doing the thing? Well, if you just stole my pig, I'd get a new respawn, but you've juggled my pig. That's how did you, I'll just seem like the thing to do. It just seemed right. I felt like I could deprive you of the pig and no get no respawn but you've juggled my pig that's how did you I just seem like the thing to do it just seemed right I felt like I could deprive you the pig and no get no respawn you have destroyed me it's like yeah I gotta say this game's not very challenging and probably not very fun I don't think I'll ever

play again and then I just I guess that would be great you're like doing stuff that only someone who knows the game well you'd be like yeah it just made sense to send my scout forward hit your boar twice to ensure that it chases me and then steal it. Like is that something that you didn't do? A little piece of me wants to put this plan into action, but I also know my discord would rat me out for opening that game four times a day. I would, I would immediately be like in our group chat, like, what do you want to play? It's like, uh, what the, the God power I've had the most fun using. It's not even one of the most powerful

ones because late game you get like meteor showers, like wolf attacks, like there's a Norse one, Fimbulwinter, a bunch of stuff pops up, wolves to kill villagers. Athena, or not Athena, Aphrodite gives you one just like from the Iliad where you can like target an area of the map and it will turn your enemy soldiers into pigs and then you can eat the pigs. And so like there's no it's so disheartening you're like I got a good force we're charging in and then they turn you into pigs and it's like oh not only did we not achieve much on that fight he's got a lot of food to eat now. Like, this is bad news. I remember that in the Odyssey when they got to the island and she turned his men to pigs. I think they ate a couple of them. They did. They did. That was quite, I mean, that's the word, the Odyssey. Yeah. I like that. I like that book. But more so, I like the shitty TV movie. I always talk about how it's got one of those triumphant moments at the end when Odysseus comes back

and gets his fucking revenge and and all these suitors are in his house trying to marry his wife they've been slapping his son around they've been slapping his servants around they've been fucking his housemaid and then they're all in there in his living room feet kicked up and now and today they're going to do a little test to see who's the man enough to like marry his wife off to basically and take his kingdom from him and he fucking comes in there and he bends the magic bow and strings it and shoots the arrow through a dozen axe handle holes while they all watch and he transforms from the old man he the guise of an old man back to his badass youthful oiled up bicep self and he's like you came into my vascular you came into my home that I built with these hands and tried to take what was mine and he looks at his son

He's like now and like he'd been told the Sun is like you have to hold your rage until it's time and the Sun is goes And like throws a spear so hard at the main like asshole that it like he flies through the air And is nailed to a wall impaled or some shit ah that's a great thing i love that shit if you go back and watch it on youtube it's in i don't know 300p and it and it is not gonna live up to what i've described Odysseus is almost in the wrong for that he's like what you try to usurp my power a mere 37 years after I disappear across the horizon. Not today. Oh, I was I was delayed.

I had to get some goddess pussy. And then there was a while where. Wait, you were getting pussy while you were. Well, yeah, it was a layover on Goddess Pussy Island. And my men got turned into pigs. We ate Olaf. You ate my son. We didn't know.

Yeah, he's been gone so long. It's like the boss of the country has left and been gone for 20 something years and they're like, we need a new boss. We need a new king here. And your wife is the queen. So like someone needs to marry her because she's a widow. Yeah. I like that story. And even more like the TV. Being gone for like 40 years and thinking you need to wear a disguise when you get back is absurd. He's the king though. Like when any... I mean they recognize him right away. They were like, oh shit, it's Odysseus. I guess they kinda did, but they wouldn't have. All the suitors were probably two years old when he left.

It'd be like if Bill Clinton left for 20 years and came back. You'd be like, fuck, he's here. We thought it was a myth. It was a myth. I just been, you know what? I got caught on my own love Island. Actually, if y'all want Hillary, take her, you know, we don't even fight about this. Pretty good accent.

This is all over. Well, you weren't even calling for her. You can have her anyway. Kyle, Jackie and I have started watching the aliens movies. I think there's nine of them. Here's my question. We started with Alien because it's the first one. It is. But it's not. The oldest one in like lore. Oh, you want to go chronological? Well, that's what I was asking. Would you watch these things in like movie timeline or release date timeline? Uh, I'd watch. So let me just first say, my girlfriend is a massive aliens fan. Um,

and she has only recently like gotten super enthralled with it because she's been playing alien isolation. game should be as in her He went and watched alien Romulus without me like she she like she's seen the newest movie Yeah, I want to go frankly But I don't really want to go she's like I'm going she's like she took her friends they went But uh, so she's, super duper into it. What I would do, I like the first one a lot. It's Ridley Scott's directing Sigourney Weaver's there,

Sigourney Weaver's role, all the roles were written sexless. So the benefit of that, especially, and for that time period is, they wrote a woman like a man and she comes off as a great fucking character. Dude, I could not pin an age on the actress. She looks 19 in that film and her hair looks 34. You see her bush. Oh my God. It's like it's everywhere. Oh yeah. I don't remember her scene.

It's peeking out of the side of stuff. Weaver Bush cannot be contained by those tiny teeny panties. I promise you both movies you got Bush. The second one, you get more Bush. She comes out of her pod. I promise both movies you got Bush the second one you get more Bush She comes out of her pod. I like the first one a ton I don't know if I like it more or the second one because the second one you got James Cameron taking over the directing and they make an action movie there's its famous story about James Cameron walk into the the studios at Sony or whatever and writing the word alien on the board and then drawing an s on the end and then drawing two lines through that the dollar sign i mean like and they're like sold how much money would you need mr cameron and the second one is tremendous to me too i love it the third one is a slog i think

david fincher maybe directed it it's depressing they kill off main characters. They leave Sigourney Weaver on a prison rape planet It's sad Sigourney Weaver didn't want to do any more alien movies So she forced them to kill her character off at the end of course then the fourth one comes around and like 97 I think some work between 94 97 they made the the fourth one alienurrection. It's not very good again. It's in the future they've cloned Ripley and in and because she was pregnant with a queen alien at a time of her death their Their DNA is fused so they end up with a Ripley clone and an alien Queen clone And it's basically just to shoot him up on a space station went on a riders in it, too It's pretty it's pretty good, but it's honestly trash. The first two are the only ones

worth watching. Then when you get into the newer movies like Covenant and Prometheus, I think Prometheus on its own, there are parts of it that are very beautiful and it's telling a huge story, but when it gets down to the decisions the characters make in both of the movies, the newer movies, Covenant and Prometheus, the astronauts in space are making stupid person decisions you wouldn't have happen at a McDonald's. The fry cook at McDonald's would never be like, hey, you know what, let's not make burgers today. Let's go to France. There's a part where the whole point of covenant is they're on their way to colonize a new planet. They have thousands of people asleep and they have an accident and they have to stop for a minute and they realize,

hey, there's a planet right here that could work like right over there We don't have to travel for five ten more years or whatever. We could go there and it's like We're going to a specific planet guys. Let's stick to the mission They go to a scary alien planet and they just land on it and walk around in t-shirts They don't put a helmet on they don't put a gas mask on they're breathing the alien air and wouldn't you know it? There's like spores there that mutate you and make monsters come out of you like gremlins and Then everybody fucking dies and ships are exploding because I should ask your girlfriend for this advice. You're just shitting on every movie Chronological order or lore order you'd like it better if you watch the first two movies and called it a night Kyle kicks off with well, I really liked your pubes and all these movies suck.

They do they fucking suck Sigourney look Alien and Aliens really good movies like like they're they're four star favorites they're all-time classics. Alien versus Predator is fun. I go back to them frequently. Which one? I don't know which one I saw now. I didn't really see the one in the ice pyramid under the ground with the black ice climbing Lady, it's been a while Maybe 13 it's an abomination and there's one good scene in it There's one good scene in that movie and it's when you finally have a predator fight an alien and then it's done with that Like like there was and PG 13

Goodness now hate that movie. I hate alien versus predator Requiem the movie that came out a couple years later in PG-13 again, and then I really liked The newest predator movie prey that was a good movie. That was a good movie and it's a girl alien I was ago. It's an Indian girl as the the main character and I love it job But I got to say the only two good alien movies that are actually good good are the first two But you can watch them all I would watch them in production order Because when you even though Prometheus and covenant take place out of the timeline

Like they don't really lead into alien one at all. Yeah alien versus predator apparently is Before any of them. It's the very first one in the lore Yeah, I didn't know that I just was on the website and then yeah, I like you said, I don't think that oh you Here's what we have to be excited about in the alien universe though The the guy who made the director made Legion on FX And I think he made something else that's really well-loved is making an alien TV show for FX They're getting a series about alien and I it's called alien earth and I think it's going to be the new earliest in the in the Timeline I think we might be in like I think it's might me our time or like shortly like a near future to us

Aliens and something to do with earth or whatever That I'm actually excited for but honestly all alien movies except for the first two suck. They really do they like subpar movies I've seen times. Yeah, I've had this topic for months If there was a sex Olympics which Category would you compete in? Mm-hmm. Butthole speed eating contest. Yeah, you get as many as you can get in your mouth at once. Zach says fertility. I like it. I like it. Firm count. Oh, yeah. That would be one that everyone should

compete in because you never know. Like, Oh my God, I know I won the sperm competition or you'd be horrible news and it'd be like, you have no sperm. You ever look at your jism in your, under that fancy Microsoft you got, you got over there. No, that's not the to do list. Dude, see what your sperm count is. you can figure it out. There's that famous like reddit thing Where like I couldn't even tell the sex of my baby Ultrasound Well, I think you see the sperm is pretty easy through a microscope at like four six hundred magnification, right? I think what would the contest be?

other than that's the sort of the core of the question the fact is fuck I was like Receiving hit i'm really good at it. I can be complimentary. I can be encouraging. I know you site I got my jeans on and I think that'd be part of the female competition and you'd be more of like the equivalent of a hurdle like Blow you and then just what they do and blow the night. I've received BJ is better than anyone you they take a they take a receive BJs better than anyone you know. They take a one kilogram weight. They take a one kilogram weight and there's like a loop and they hook it around your erection and we see who can hold the weight up the longest. It's an erection. Now, perfect. Now there's actually like a weight. So it's like, wow, this guy got 10 pounds. Real strong penis. We're also going to tie weights to

your testicles and have a lifting competition. It's very much like a squat. It's like a goblin squat. It's goblin squat. Yeah. Goblin squat? Not even a goblin squat? No, this is the goblin squat. This is different. This is where you tie it to your balls. Okay. I don't know if I want to compete in the goblin squat, but I guess you need to find what you're good at. Yeah, I would be, I think, I think, uh, try all of them just to see what I excelled in. All your events sound horrible to compete in compared to the guy. I have Olympic sexual prowess. It's gotta be hard. It's gotta be difficult. Otherwise everyone's going to want to do it.

Yeah, it will be. Everybody's going to be trying out, you know, you think that those gymnastics coaches are perverts. Oh my God. The sex coach. All right, kids, come on in here. We're breaking out that that masseuse creep from the girls to coach. That's his, that's his Mighty Ducks coaching story. Bring him out. Bring it in. Bring it in. This is a matter. Sir, this is a matter of the country's security.

We cannot allow China to win the Sex Olympics. We need to bring him out. Fine. Keep it up. I read that that guy gets targeted frequently in prison. Oh, and man, do it a fucking go here for me. I love the Olympics. You got some shit, man. Do it a fucking go here for me. I love the floor. I love the Olympics. You got some shit homes.

I think that's the general vibe in there. If you fuck with like kids for sure. But it seems like because he's a famous kid diddler, like the articles that they even get his ass whooped all the time. Did he was like, was his job? He was the coach or the no, he was the doctor. The team doctor. So he was like giving inappropriate massages and like looking at him naked and like,

I guess, groping and molesting. And he did this to like, he was like, wasn't it like dozens or like a hundred girl? It was an absurd amount. Yeah. And then came forward and we're like, oh, this guy who's been in this position for, you know, 20 years for 10 crops. What were you saying? Like, like, like, like, man, he guy who's been in this position for 20 years for 10 crops. What were you saying? Taylor's like, like, like, man, he checks both boxes with these girls, quantity and quality. Like, like if you're going to do it, Taylor was like, my God, this guy,

offline, Taylor never stops about how cool is this. Disrespect. It's nonstop. I'm always like, man, you know who we need to get out of prison? The, the fucking Olympics and molester. Like the teen Olympians, Olympians, like hashtag caked up. I'm like, you can do hashtag and a text message, dude. What are we doing here?

Taylor, you're like a doomer. My f*****g WhatsApp saved that s**t to my phone. Now I'm in trouble. Yeah. Hashtag early release, hashtag clemency? Gripping it. Hashtag early release. Hashtag clemency? Grip in it. Hashtag gripping it. I saw, do you see Doc's new tweet? He's like, are people still streaming video games? What a snooze fest. And the first reply is like, didn't you sext a minor? And he tweets like cruising in the Lambo with the windows down, just living

la la vacation or like coming back from my la vacation or some shit like that. And I was just like, man, I'm a little tone deaf. I saw on Tweet that video today where it's like AI of him in a speedboat, like racing towards an island. And using an island was a misstep because everyone is like goofing and clowning on him like Epstein Island jokes and one, uh, this one guy, he's got like a physical handicap, Ricky Berwick,

and he makes a bunch of jokes about it, like inner spliced himself, or he's like flying towards the Island. And then Ricky's like, please don't, don't come back. We don't want you here. It's a PDF, not a DOC. Dr. Disrespect taking himself down. Where is he coming from? Epstein Island, yeah, yeah, yeah. Can we, can we watch? I haven't seen this, 2.30.

It's literally, it's an AI dude. It's not worth watching. It's the same clip over and over. Yeah, it's buffer around in it. I just wanted to see, like, get some sense of, like, first of all, tone deaf. I mean, come on, bro. They think you're, you know,

folks think you're like pedophile right now, right? Like you need to be seen with an adult woman ASAP. Yeah, your stock is low right now. So maybe not AI boat videos. I don't know where he's returning to. Is he gonna be on X? Is he gonna be on YouTube? Ooh, maybe on X. X makes so much sense. I don't know how well that's monetized, but you imagine

he'd get his own sweetheart deal. I don't think it's monetized well. Oh yeah, you're right. He would get his own deal. I've heard that it's monetized really poorly because Mr. Beast said he makes something like a hundred times more on YouTube. Like it's a wild number. It's ever evolving though over there. It's got gotta be with Musk and his advertisers. I mean, I'm not Dr. Disrespect's biggest fan, but let's all admit that if somebody wanted him, they might pay a lot. Yeah, he's got a big audience, or seemingly I guess.

They really need to, like tomorrow's stream for him is gonna be huge because there will be a ton of people just like poking in because they're gonna wanna see what he says or what's up. I would imagine YouTube, but like who knows if like let's say he goes back and tries to do his normal streaming thing a month from now. Like who knows? Maybe he's at a half. Yeah. His original viewership prior to the scandal. I don't know. I don't know. I know right away it's going to be huge though. Like I will be big because people are going to want to see they weren't like,

what's his explanation? What's he sponsored? Like, like, like going to be. I always thought Dr. Dr. Pepper would be perfect. Docs one, one prescription. Only one prescription for your thirst. Two out of two doctors recommend the pepper. Better a small. Nevermind. I don't.

I hope that it all turns out. There's just a misunderstanding and Twitch was just maybe he should team up with the Olympic Doc. Couple of a couple of docs just out on the town. Team up with the Olympic doctor in prison. That'd be fun. Yeah. Although I don't think that guy's long for this world because I've heard at least four different times of like, Hey, remember that, uh, Olympic doctor? Yeah, he's having a rough go of it. And it's like, yeah, I don't doubt it. And usually those rough goes, you know, they get you eventually.

That sucks. Right? Like it's bad enough to I don't doubt it and usually those rough goes, you know, they get you eventually that sucks Right like it's bad enough to go to prison trust me But like going to a real scary prison and then being targeted for what you did. I saw Something the other day this guy was going to prison He's got a swastika on his face and the commentators like say this swastika To be in the Florida penal system. You need permission to rock that. You need to ask the good old boys. They're the main white supremacist game and turns out you have to earn your face swastika

and the good old whatever the fuck. And he's like, they're gonna have a thing or two to say about this when he hits the block. And I'm like, how scary would that be? That would be so scary. What would your opening thing be as you're walking up to the cell with all the white supremacists? Well, this guy was going in for double murder or something. First of all, his whole face

looks like the Joker. He's all ruined. So I think you want to be like, hey, I know I haven't actually earned this yet, but put me to work and I will. Let's do that. Let's say that for now, I owe you. And let's get me out of this debt. So, you know what I would do I was the white supremacist. I'm like I'd be like name any Jew Name it you don't like them. Yeah, don't like them. They've not try me again. I think I know where this is going Ready going into how does one earn an avocado? Larry David don't like him Julia Louis Dreyfus like half to you. That's where they'd get me Pretty in the 90s

Yeah, well she aids really well she's pretty hot and veep. Yeah, she aged well. She aged really well. She's pretty hot and veep. I always thought she was like, watching the show, like Jerry always had like smoking hot model and actress girlfriends, but I was still like, man, Elaine's at the top upper echelon of the ladies that he sees still. Yeah, super hot. Yeah, that's why you always wanted Jerry to get back with Elaine. It would ruin the show though. They did it once that for a little while and then that was kind of their whole thing. You know, they sort of made an episode about this and that. And the other. And the other. Yeah, you got another good episode. Man, I need to

buy Netflix again so I can watch Seinfeld through an additional time. He left Netflix. I left Netflix a year and a half two years ago I canceled it and it was literally because I had to confront that I was spending $17 a month for a Seinfeld machine and that's absurd Hey, it's not a flex. I'll put it on there ASAP Netflix is my second most important subscription I think if I were to yeah, the number one's YouTube Yeah, you're number one far number one for me as well. Yeah, we're YouTube than anything else by far

And after that it's probably Netflix. I've used only a lot for me after that. Yeah, I use hulu a ton Do you have ads? No, I have no ad version. I have the very expensive Hulu version that I need to downgrade, but I keep forgetting But I've got a lot I've got like live TV and my baseball and all that shit on there that I don't even watch anymore But I like Hulu a lot. That's where ESPN plus is to to watch all the UFC fight nights and everything I want you like family guys on there Are you watching are you watching Family Guy more often?

Like family guys on there Are you watching are you watching Family Guy more often? Yeah what I do, honestly That show better than any other show perhaps lends itself to just clip episodes on YouTube Because it's just one gag after another that can be really disconnected and don't depend on that so many cutaways I like those I like what I can watch an hour-long fucking family guy gag video. I like those I've also been watching some Simpson shit and some Seeing of the hill shit. I just watched the the clip from King of the Hill where bill wants to get in shape So he goes to GNC and I think it might be macho man Randy Savage as the guy who works at GNC I've actually been

It kicked out of my own gym because I was too muscular. They could, they were intimidated by my pump. I was thinking maybe I could be, I could go to your gym and I could train you, make you a real man, but I'm going to need a hundred percent bill. And he's like, Oh, I think I can do it. But one of the products on the shelf was called peck nectar. And he's reading the ingredients and peck nectar.

And I was just like, that's hilarious. There's time with the pump. It's going to give you an everything. But yeah, I think that's macho man, Randy Savage there. Um, and there might be another wrestler when they get back to Bill's house. Cause I didn't watch the whole episode, but I remember it and, and, and they're like bullying Hank a little bit, all these heads heads over at Bill's house all pumping iron. And even Bill, you can tell, like they start animating Bill differently.

He's getting big. Like Bill's getting muscular too. I think they put on steroids, don't they? At some point he's on steroids. Yeah. I don't remember if that's... I loved the episode where Hank was on steroids. Oh yeah, where she gives him testosterone. Hank's smoking testosterone and it was lemonade

and Hank's getting like, he's losing that chubby body. He's getting fit and muscular and he's outside working out hard and the blonde, Bill Dale's wife is looking at him like, oh my, he's looking good over there. And Hank comes back and grabs the whole pitcher of testosterone lemonade and he's drinking it from the pitcher and it's spilling on his shirt. And his muscles are showing through and she's like, oh my, she's blushing. But right before that, he had been outside jumping over the lawnmower over and over. Yeah. That's the episode where he signs up to do the running of the bull. Oh yeah.

Yeah. And then he, they give them the tea shots and then Peggy goes back to the doctor and is like, hypothetically, what would happen if I snuck this into my husband's food? He's like, oh, well, that would cause him to go through puberty again. And she's like, well, there's no problem there because I have stopped cold turkey. That's not what you want to do. Yeah. Now, I like that episode. And then there's an old episode.

Hank has like no ass. It's like a medical condition. And it's a genuine medical condition. And so he has to wear this. He starts wearing this device back there that's like two fake butt cheeks that you sit on, but it makes him look all caked up. So he gets pulled over and the cops hitting on him. It's a lady cop.

She's like, she's like molesting him a little during the traffic stop. And at the end, he's lawnmower racing and he's leaning into the turn so much that his left butt cheek explodes. Yeah. But but his support group of no ass men is like, like fling him their asses in support so that he can flip one of their fake ass cheeks into his device and finish the race. It's so funny. I had the doctor's office originally they're like Mr. Hill you need to wear this uh this gluteus prosthetic and he's like oh you want me to wear a fake ass? The doctor's like, Mr. Hill, are your shoes fake feet?

And then it's just the thing left and I'm like, that's pretty fucking funny. Such a good show. So many good moments in that show. You guys ready to rap? Yeah, I think it's... I suppose so. I've had all I could take. What a fun show. PKA 716.