Pappy's Flatshare - Beef Brothers Cold Cuts w/ Abi Clarke S12E17

Episode Date: May 23, 2022

The Beef Brothers are here to sort out your beef with special guest Clarkey with an e - Abi Clarke!Abi Clarke - https://www.instagram.com/abiclarkecomedyPappy’s - https://twitter.com/papp...ystweetIf you have a flatshare based beef you'd like us to solve then send it to beefbrotherspodcast@gmail.comSupport us on Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/pappysflatshareLIVE IN PERSON SHOWSTUESDAY 7th JUNE - HELEN BAUER & NINA CONTI @ The Phoenix, Cavendish Square https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/flatshare-slamdown-with-helen-bauer-and-nina-conti-tickets-333482905347Produced by Gwyn Rhys Davies Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 Greetings, Lister Dear, I'm Tom. I'm Ben. I'm Matthew and welcome to an episode of Beef Brothers Cold Cuts. And this week we have a superb guest in Abbey Clark. Abbey Clark is here. Abbey Clark of Internet fame. I'm going to say. Yeah. To say. Certainly. A fellow clarky. A fellow clarky. And there was some confusion as to when I was talking to clarky who I was talking to in this episode.
Starting point is 00:00:31 But of course I was talking to both of you. I don't think that's happened before. I don't think we've had another parry or crossbe as a guest. We never know. We haven't. That's the mission now, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. If there are other parries out that you want to be a guest on Beef Brothers cold cuts, we've got to do it now. We've got to do it. We're a lot lighter. Please.
Starting point is 00:00:56 Beef Brothers podcast at gmail.com if you would like your beef to be solved on the on the podcast. We'd love to hear your beefs. We've had some really good ones recently, so we'd love to hear some more beef brothers podcast at gmail.com. As always, join the Patreon.com forward slash Papi's flat share and get tickets to see if they haven't already sold out Helen Bauer and Nina Conce do a flat share slam down on the 7th of June, which should be a lot of fun.
Starting point is 00:01:23 What a lineup. Yeah, it's gonna be good fun. Should we crack into the episode? That's waste no time and get into it. Well, if you've got a problem, don't call it a problem, if you've got a problem, call it a bee. If you've got a bee, maybe we can help you be from the sorting at your bee. Hello, Abby Clark, how you doing? Hi, good, thank you. I haven't left the house today, so I can't claim anything interesting's happened to me. But I'm doing good, thanks. Is that a regular thing for you that you realise at the end of the day?
Starting point is 00:01:58 I've just not been out at all. Yeah, yeah, it can happen like, if I'm doing social media stuff rather than anything else I sometimes forget I haven't seen sunlight in like two weeks and then I go out like a little boy in the secret garden like I quite often won't realize it's nice weather because I've just been like in a dark room But you not look at other people's social media and then they're going, oh, amazing sunshine. Or you just, when you're in your social media bubble, you're just like, yeah, but they're doing the right kind of social media where they do traveling and beauty
Starting point is 00:02:33 and I've chosen comedy and it's a much sad, a darker line. You don't have to tell us. There's a lot more editing and a lot more on your own stuff. Yeah, no, I don't actually follow that many influencers. There's a few I follow, but I don't think I'm actually that clued in on the social world. I shouldn't say this. Everyone in the industry is like, that's the girl for socials. I didn't necessarily mean influencers. I mean, like,
Starting point is 00:03:04 I just my friends. Just people who say it's sunny outside, you know that. So reason, my friends, they don't have the need ID to update their story throughout the day. But yeah, I had an envy on the snow, everyone posts about the snow. I genuinely feel like a sick child is not allowed out. Where, because you're not in London, are you? You're based elsewhere.
Starting point is 00:03:24 And I'm in Brazil. Did you get a lot of snow in Bristol? I don't remember. I don't remember. I just remember on social media everyone doing they're like, what's snowing? But yeah, there's no good places to sludge in Bristol so it's irrelevant anyway, what's the point? I feel like once you lose the school snow days and there's not a good hill nearby
Starting point is 00:03:48 I became the adult I always hated of just being like this is actually just inconvenient. Can I ask you a question about snow days? How did everybody find out that their school was closed? What was that because on the radio? Yeah, the radio. On the radio. The low radio station, yeah. Yeah. We also found out through C-Facts. Oh, really? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:12 It went big. We got to watch it on C-Facts. So it meant, you know, like, if you're watching something on C-Facts. Well, like the football results, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, exactly like that. You'd have to sit there waiting for the screens to come around. We were at St. Joseph's, that was our school. So it was, you know, thank you so much.
Starting point is 00:04:29 It was a good school. What a weird bra. Straight up. I said, Joseph. Well, I meant we weren't at like St. Aloysius or something, which we were in page one, as soon as you turn it on, boom, there's page one. I see.
Starting point is 00:04:40 I'm talking about, it's a little bit of waiting time to get to the jazers, what I'm talking about. I'm not probably, it wasn't a flex. So to get to the jazers what I'm talking about It wasn't a flex So in Bristol what is your what is your flat-share situation? What is your house share situation? Have you lived with why I'm shamefully Podcasting from my parents' bedroom right now Oh man It's the millennial dream
Starting point is 00:05:03 I going well. It's the millennial dream. I think it was all of my friends beat me to it and are already in flat shares and I'm like, who do I live with? I missed it, I missed the boat, it was all in lockdown, they all screwed me over, they all bodied out. And now I'm friendless, but I can't live with strangers because I film random sketches in my room and kitchen. And so I can't just live with two accountants and being like, hey guys, mind staying out of the kitchen for five hours while I just film a little skit, thanks. This is why you need to know other people
Starting point is 00:05:42 in the influencer industry because you should be living in one of those mad houses that they have like in LA, whereas like a mention and everybody there is an influencer. I was actually invited to one. Really? Yeah, yeah. Well, it was like a group of kind of British comedy tiktokers. It wasn't an official one, but they were like, we're thinking of like, maybe, or even
Starting point is 00:06:04 if we just all kind of live in the similar area, we can make videos together and stuff, but at the time, that was just too much. And I mean, at the end of the day, I don't want to be a full-time social media person. It feels like the other extreme, like there's living with normal people and being like, I've got a TikTok in the kitchen
Starting point is 00:06:22 and then living with 15 TikTokers. And being like, we need a fucking schedule on the kitchen. I think other than TikTok. That's right, yeah, exactly that's it, yeah. It's a fine balance, isn't it really? Yeah, we'd all be fighting over the kitchen for a skit. It would be just as bad. I'd be like, guys, can you stop making prank noises
Starting point is 00:06:39 while I film this really, it's catch-up thing. Prank noises. Can you stop screaming prank? It was a prank! And I was like, oh my god, this was not planned! That's how the audio goes. Yeah, so basically I'm, it's impossible to live with me.
Starting point is 00:06:57 I'm unlivable. So I'm, I'm still in my parents until a boyfriend accepts me and my career. Okay, well it's not, we don't normally use this as a lonely heart shoutout. I was gonna say, are you using this as a service? No, I do, I do have fun, I do have fun, he just does something. He's just not prepared, he's just enjoying his time in his kitchen. Whitney, he just moved into a house with a Tik Tok, as he's like, I'm sorry, I think. You can't come with me.
Starting point is 00:07:31 And if you spoke, because obviously you say you're on live with a bull, but if you spoke to your parents, do they love having you around? I mean, I imagine it's quite... Oh, OK. Honestly, they can't wait to get rid of me. My mum is someone who has lived for the empty nest, and it's never happened for her. She also gets very anxious about being on film. So she's worried to come into her living room,
Starting point is 00:07:58 because she's like, are you filming me? Is this being filmed? Which I don't know why, because that's not my kind of content either. No, no, you're not constantly making a making a catch an egg or anything like that. Yeah, no. I think she's, even if I'm doing Instagram stories, she doesn't understand that it's fine if she walks in the background of an Instagram story. She's like, oh my god, like, army crawling.
Starting point is 00:08:18 I can't be seen. But they cannot wait for me to come with me and to take the take the softbox lights and the tripod with me. I think they're ready for some peace. Yeah, well you know what, I mean what do we need to do to get you either some new mates or a boyfriend of yours to connect? What can we do? I feel like now this should be our, you know we're supposed to be solving our listless beefs, but I feel like you've got more problems that need solving in the immediate future. I think just generally I need to get super rich, and then I could just like get my own house
Starting point is 00:08:56 when that'd be cool. Yeah. You've come to the right place, because podcasting is brimming with money. Sick. All this time! because podcasting is brimming with money. Ssick. All this time, a corner I wasn't getting in. I think podcasting actually is brimming with money, Clarke. It's just not being a particular podcast.
Starting point is 00:09:13 Yeah. Oh, okay, I'm on the wrong one. Yeah. I should have got a shagmarine of annoyance. Yeah, it's a stepping step. We're a gateway podcast, yeah. Okay, okay. I'm doing this for exposure and development.
Starting point is 00:09:24 I understand. Exactly, we'll send this to all the right people. Shall we crack on and solve some of the listeners' beefs? Yeah. Clarke, do you want to start with yours? Oh my gosh. Oh, sorry, sorry. Oh my gosh.
Starting point is 00:09:37 I'm sorry, there's two Clarke's in. Which Clarke's in. Which Clarke's in. This is of course, we're in the problem of which Clarke are we talking about. By the way, I'll say this now I do because I'm not I don't think we're quite at this stage, I'm ready to be at so over familiar that I call you Clarky Abby But Mark Olver does first thing you met me. Well, there's a lot of things that Mark Olver does that I'm not prepared to do Anyway, yeah, and actually when I sent, because we've only met the once,
Starting point is 00:10:05 we met at the comedy awards, and very good fun it was to. And then I thought, oh, you know, what's your stuff? I thought, yeah, you'd be brilliant to come on the podcast. And I sent you a message through the DMs on Instagram. I thought the best way to get an Abbey Clark is through Instagram. Send you a message, and then you said, is it in person or over Zoom? And for some reason I panicked and said and wrote Zoom baby Zoom.
Starting point is 00:10:32 And then I heard nothing from you for 24 hours. And I had the worst 24 hours of just thinking, why do you say Zoom baby Zoom? Zoom would have suffice. I think I was panicked. I was panicked about talking to someone a bit younger than me and thought, I've got to play this cool, right? Zoom baby. You have to everything, yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:52 Zoom baby. Zoom. And I was genuinely, I had that real sinking feeling my stomach. Oh no. We could have had Abby on the podcast, but I had to go with my Zoom baby Zoom quip. So.
Starting point is 00:11:03 Oh no, it was such a certain Zoom. I was like, Sick, doesn't need to be questioned. With Zoom baby Zoom in it. I'm so sorry. Definitely Zoom baby Zoom in it. It took you 20 months to recover from it. If it's a big thing. Should I get you a half a minute?
Starting point is 00:11:18 Should I get you a half a minute? Should I get you a half a minute? Should I get you a half a minute? Should I get you a half a minute? Should I get you a half a minute? Should I get you a half a minute? Should I get you a half a minute? Should I get you a half a minute? Should I get you a half a minute? Should I get you a half a minute? Should I get you a half a minute? Right, Ben, Ben and Jix Clark. Hello. What is the beef that a listener sent in to us?
Starting point is 00:11:27 We've got a work bestie beef from Simon. Okay, hello, Simon. Dear puppies and guests, I have a work bestie. She's absolutely lovely, but... It's a flag. It's a flag, early doors. Sorry. We're bestie.
Starting point is 00:11:47 I think you're the brawler. I have a work bestie. He's absolutely lovely, but shit, I heard you're up. Okay. Do I address this? We are teachers. Sadly, we don't live together, but are going camping together in the summer.
Starting point is 00:12:04 Simon, what do you... I love it. Yeah, I love that camping together is somehow. It's like, she's bad at her job, I just don't think I can go camping. I think that's... I've got a word. Best of you shit is job. We go camping together every year.
Starting point is 00:12:19 It's a blast and break. It's like, it's a game. Is he in this team? Or... Yeah. That was a real moment there, he in this team? Or? Yeah. There was a real moment there where both Clark and I were going, which ones are gonna be? I realised I've only been to the gastronomy one.
Starting point is 00:12:32 There's Clark and you're in every time. You might have thought that. I didn't think that. Yeah. Sorry, bad news is Tom's not my best friend, but the news is he doesn't necessarily think I'm shit. Nice. I managed to get both of you there with one comment. Yeah. Tom is not my best friend, but he doesn't necessarily think I'm shit. I managed to get both of you there with one comment.
Starting point is 00:12:48 Can we go back about the camping bit? Is it? Yeah, read the final bit for me please. Yeah, because I think there's a lot going on here. Sadly, we don't live together, but are going camping together in the summer. Simon. Now, I think the reason Simon's put this is because this is a flat share based problem-solving show.
Starting point is 00:13:13 And he's going, well, I've got this problem. It's nothing to do with being in a flat share. So I'll say, well, we are going camping together, so therefore you should solve it. And you know what? He's got on the show with it. It's a little poor. Not enough people wrote in, so we're going in there. We recorded two episodes back to back
Starting point is 00:13:30 in the space of 48 hours. It's your lucky day, Simon. Simon, you know what? When there were two beef brothers in a month, because we do this on a sort of monthly basis, but when there were two in a month, Simon's getting through. The next beef is set in prison,
Starting point is 00:13:45 I'll be just be up. Just be up. I see, sorry, I misread that situation as being this guy wants to end up living with his work best. Yes, that's why he got to work. I was like, I was like, there's romance in the air here. Oh, maybe I missed that.
Starting point is 00:14:02 Maybe I missed something, but I lived together. And we're going camping together in the summer and I was like, hello. That's me being farty, fast. You don't, when you fancy someone, you don't go, I'm so sad I don't live with them. You're like, I wish we could go to the cinema. Like, that's true, that's a chance.
Starting point is 00:14:19 I maybe, I maybe you need to start doing that if you want to actually move that. Maybe I need to, at to be my opening line. Just first date, move in. Just look, let's not waste time. I'm in a desperate situation. I, I, I relate to this actually. I think I struggle if someone is, it depends if they actually work together within work.
Starting point is 00:14:43 If that makes sense. Right. If you rely on each other, are they in the same department? Yeah. Yeah, they're both teaching the same department. Yeah, the drug or whereas it's just like a PE teacher, I'm like, you do you do.
Starting point is 00:14:56 Let's meet up at the end. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. Also, there's something, I mean, I don't know. Is there something a little bit? I know we shouldn't be just attacking Simon here because obviously He out of the goodness of his heart. He's written in to try and get this beef sold But is there a is there a situation where there's a little an element of sort of arrogance?
Starting point is 00:15:14 You know because You're actually you're doing that job as well. Shouldn't you be you know evaluating yourself and seeing a you doing the best job You can rather than looking around going well that person's not doing very well I bet if I looked at your marking Simon It's got sloppy Mark are you marking the marking? Yeah, I don't know you mark marking who marks the markers Yeah, I thought I thought the point of marking was to make it illegible and you can't Offsetting him that's what I'm doing right now. I'm off-setting Simon
Starting point is 00:15:42 But what if he's in the position that like in the staff room, people are like, hey, Gerald sucks, and like he's like, what do I, you know, it's a reputation in the staff room problem. If you're associated with the shit one, do you know what I mean? Yeah, if you're dragging the whole department down, it's dragging the whole school down. Yeah. If there's bad teaching there, it's dragging the whole school down. Yeah. If there's bad teacher in there, it's dragging the school down. Social status is important. I'd like the details on what makes them a bad teacher as well, because there's different genres of bad teacher. Yeah, there's criminals.
Starting point is 00:16:15 Grinch. Grinch. Yeah. I think criminals are big one, yeah. Sorry, I went, you went mass-french, criminal. It was my first. It's the way I need to be bad in it. I think I reckon, I don't know Simon, but I reckon if they were committing crimes of any
Starting point is 00:16:36 nature on the school, I would say that goes beyond. Now I go straight to Papi's podcast. Absolutely. Please, I'd stop. I'm like, guys, I'm going to issue. Sure. Looking at the kids' fannies. Oh my God, they're for goodness sake. We all got it.
Starting point is 00:16:50 We all know what you were talking about. I had to finish the bit. I had to finish the bit. It was Steve Lim. He's got a lot of post-it notes at home, I'll say that much about him. That would be an ointy. My brain went to kind of, obviously the 90s person in me went to teachers at White.
Starting point is 00:17:11 That would be a good Lincoln. He's a bad teacher because he's in the pub, he's not done his marking, he's running to school because he's late, balance a bastion in his headphones. Like, you know, like, it's like that kind of bad teacher because otherwise, you wouldn't be great mates with him. Do you know what I mean? My generation's bad teacher's covered in D-ass.
Starting point is 00:17:30 Yes, you could. Yeah, there you go. This is the generational gap, you see. But she's really fit, so that's why you're friends with her. Exactly. You can do anything you want. You can do anything you want. My whole generation's bad teachers.
Starting point is 00:17:42 Sorry, I don't want to. I considered myself in your generation. I do think there is, I think there might be some chemistry going on here. I slightly misread the going camping thing, but it's like, it feels like there might be something else to it. I don't know. I've got to work best, he's absolutely lovely. Now, the other thing was okay. Sorry, sorry. I just didn't, so it's a woman. Yes. Okay. Yeah. So it could be Camerand Day-Ass.
Starting point is 00:18:09 It could be. It could. Actually, lovely, a bit of shit to her job. Researching for the sequel. Mm-hmm. I think, like friendship conquers all here. Clearly, you buzz off each other and you get along.
Starting point is 00:18:24 If you're not a parent at the school, do you know what I mean? That's there, that's there is she. Yeah, I also know. I'd look the other way. How much of finding out she's a bad teacher is anecdotal because when you're giving someone an anecdote about work, you don't go like, oh, I'm brilliant at it. The funny stuff is telling them the bad stuff, isn't it? No, I think he knows. I think you can tell. Yeah, I think he's definitely aware.
Starting point is 00:18:58 Maybe she doesn't care much. Maybe it's quite lazy, because then that goes into the rest of your life as well that's not just job-specific maybe it's a personality trait that's rubbing him up the right way says worried she won't put up the tent and stuff like that yeah won't start the campfire if you know what i'm talking about here's the the, yeah, it was, of course, we know what your angle is Tom, but, like, can you, I mean, it's an interesting one, isn't it? Because, in comedy, right, if you meet somebody who's a comic
Starting point is 00:19:33 and you get on with them, it's very tense moment when you then see them gig, right? Because you, like, if you get on with them really, really well, you want to, you want them to be brilliant, right? You want to really like want them to be brilliant, right? You want to really like the stuff they do. And it will, it can tarnish it slightly. And do you think that's it? That's it? That he's worried that this is actually, so much so that it's seeping into the friendship. He can't, he can't have that sort of delineation. Is it in the Iq with his work bestie? Yeah, I think they're in the Iq with the Iq with the Iq the phrase work bestie.
Starting point is 00:20:05 They should be. I've got the Iq. I've found a whole new Iq. So, what's the solution though for Simon? What is our solution to? Because if you want, like, making someone a better teacher feels like a really big ask. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:24 What do you say quit and do something else? and then make them your non-work bestie? Those that say them socially? Like what's the advice? Transfer schools? Yeah. Get yourself to another school for the sake of your friendship? Maybe just ban work chat. So you don't have to hear about how bad they are.
Starting point is 00:20:49 I think plant something on them, have their move schools. Yeah, really you shouldn't. Yeah, you shouldn't be the one having to move schools. You're good at your job. Yeah, well we assume. So Simon says, yeah. But the thing is, it shouldn't be your problem anyway, Simon. But Simon's making it his problem. I think Simon's a good he really cares. He cares about
Starting point is 00:21:09 the story. He's good ambassador. Perhaps you care too much Simon, perhaps. Maybe you should be sure to hit your job Simon, that's that message do you. It's difficult at school because I guess it's like kids education you you know, it's pretty big deal if you're it's the future of the country It's the future of the world and the tick and not tick tock. It's the future of the tick tock generation It's the future of tick tock if honestly if you're not giving them good like teaching their tick tock is gonna be so bad And I have to watch those so can we just make them like slightly intelligent with good references? I really appreciate right okay, so, so it's got serious now. Now that we know that the social media company
Starting point is 00:21:49 is a lot of stake. I feel like our advice to Simon is just chill out. But I can't be a candidate. I can't be the advice. Peeps old. I think there's no better time to talk about this kind of thing than round a campfire. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:07 So I think put it off till the summer. Few beers sit around the campfire. Do you really think you enjoy, do you enjoy teaching really though? Because what you really want to do, you're such a brilliant person, I just feel like you might be a bit wasted in school. I don't think so. But if I was in school. That's also a crime. Maybe I was right in the first place. It just did this during the assembly.
Starting point is 00:22:32 It happens kind of like an organic intervention. Don't do on day one though. In case it goes sour. Just love bomb them. I like the love bombing. I'm like, you're so good at these other things. You're so much fun. School's holding you back, do you know what I mean? Yeah, you made that bivouac brilliantly. All of the... You should actually, I think what you should do is you should permanently live in the forest.
Starting point is 00:22:58 That's how good you are with it around nature. You set this fire in just under an hour, incredible. Exactly. Never go back to a building. I think buildings are what's holding you back. I think we're only three years away from a newbie from Simon, which is my best friend lives in the forest. LAUGHTER I love hanging out with her, she's great, she's brilliant company,
Starting point is 00:23:23 but I gotta go to the forest man Sadly, we don't live together in the forest That's it isn't it get them get them round the roaring campfire roast a few marshmallows and Stur... Be solved. Be from the zoning I can be solved. Abby, do you want to read your one out? Clarky. You know, no, this is Abby this time, I'm afraid. Yeah, Abby.
Starting point is 00:23:57 I also call Clarky Abby as well. Okay, so this one felt kind of like a personal attack, but it's not mine. Okay, this is not mine Hello hilarious puppies and a steamed guest. Thank you greetings from upstate New York International international Very good. I have a rather strange beef for you as it is really a self-beaf. I recently finished graduate school, oh American, and took a job close to my parents' house. Naturally, being in debt and having generous parents, I am living with them. I am having trouble balancing spending adequate time at home and doing what I want as an adult.
Starting point is 00:24:43 I am often asked if I'll be home for dinner or will be available to spend time with the family. Any thoughts on balancing the living with parents as an adult, this is really my internal beef. Your ever entertained listener, Aaron. I was that you wait to the last bit. I've got my confidence up now. I'm going through. You're a mark, baby. Yeah. Can we hear a zoom baby zooming in in New York? Zoom baby zoom.
Starting point is 00:25:14 We're going to clip that and use it at the start of all of our shows. Now this podcast was recorded over and then it'll come in zoom. Zoom baby zoom. Oh, it's gone full Italian Talia now. Ha ha ha. Oh. It's gone full, Dalmy, oh, day. Full. Right, well, let's address this to you, Abbey,
Starting point is 00:25:34 or Karky, if you prefer. What is your social setup with your parents? How often do you spend time hanging out with them? Do you feel guilty about not hanging out with them enough? No, I think the general distaste for hanging out with me. I don't have this issue quite so much. Is your advice to Aaron, become a tick tock at? I don't know what I'll hang out with. Not just your lockdown. No one's gonna want to spend time with you. Here's my advice, spend a year in lockdown, forcing your parents to do TikTok dances with you.
Starting point is 00:26:10 And I'll never torture you again. No, I do like hang out with my parents. I think it is difficult. It's that weird like moving back as an adult is like a different dynamic and relationship because what my parents struggle most with is not knowing what I'm doing. I think where they're used to kind of having control over everyone's schedules and the happenings of the house and now it's much more out of
Starting point is 00:26:38 their control and I don't think they used to that relationship with us. So I relate to this. I think dinner is one, because I don't need, my parents to make me dinner, but sometimes it's more, they get annoyed if there's more people in the kitchen. Like my dad genuinely tries to time his lunch times so that it's no one else is there. He hates having to like make lunch around other people making their own separate lunches. I get that, sure. I mean people have that in flats anyway, where they're like,
Starting point is 00:27:08 it's just easier to make like a flat meal. So I do sometimes have to say whether I'll be around for food or if I'm doing myself, doing myself catering for myself. I think maybe you should employ the calendar. Maybe that would be a good idea. A family calendar. A family calendar. A family calendar. A family calendar. A family calendar.
Starting point is 00:27:38 A family calendar. A family calendar. A family calendar. A family calendar. A family calendar. A family calendar. A family calendar. A family calendar. A family calendar. A family calendar. A family calendar. So because we're the parents now so we have to know where the parents now we're the parents exactly Yeah, my mum lives for everything being written down. She likes old school paper pen
Starting point is 00:27:53 Like written on a war calendar. So she can see what's going on where everyone's gonna be Parry's the same way you still keep your you still keep your paper calendar. Don't you? Perry paper kind, paper diary? Love it. Yeah, baby. Can't have Bill Gates know my whereabouts, every bloody step of the way. To you, right, yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:13 So I didn't get my jobs, you know what I mean? No jobs, paper diary. Did you never have to link a diary up with like an agent though? I just can't, let's not get, let's not get. We can't get into that you know what Genie Genie genuinely what what's because we we we've shared an agent for for many years and what would happen is and I would link my Google calendar up a clerk who link his Google
Starting point is 00:28:38 calendar up and Tom would send a series of photographs or fix a paper sometimes the napkins they've been napkins, this is what I'm doing this month, and it would just be like, all of his gigs are written on a napkin. Fair enough, you know, it's a system of work for you. And you know, he only misses, I'd say, one in about every four gigs.
Starting point is 00:28:55 Just to hear that happening. This feels like your guys beef, I think we've been in it. I've got an idea for this. Oh yeah. I've got an idea for this. Go out and buy a new set of clothes and a hat, right? And then say to your family, I'm going to be subletting my room out to an old college pal, and we're going to be working different shifts and stuff. So, and then, like, you kind of like put a hat on and leave the haze as like your lodger and be like, oh, he's asleep. And like, you kind of, you're, you're, you're, you're life up.
Starting point is 00:29:36 So that, so that when you want to go and have a, you jekyll and hide it, but by choice, rather than by, you know. Mental health issue. Yes, slap. I hate some potion. Yeah, yeah. Is that so? So, so you kind of have like this kind of maybe, maybe you slip out the window and come back in as the guy
Starting point is 00:29:55 I don't know, but like, there's some kind of where it's like Mr. Lodge is out. I wouldn't call him Mr. Lodge or a foe. I can't come up with a different name than Mr. Lodge. It's a bit on the nose. I don't want to give you punch up at this early stage, but I think Mr. Lodge is worth it. I just need to storm it a bit.
Starting point is 00:30:12 Not a good idea. Sure. I'm gonna take a fake. Faye, Faye Clodger. Mrs. Clodger's here to speak to you. No, don't, Mrs. Doubtfire it. I would say Aaron. Okay, you're on. I'm just gonna get, don't get, you know. I don't I don't want to get you know, I don't
Starting point is 00:30:27 Don't be like hello, it's fair here What's the what whose beef is it Aaron? Aaron Aaron staying up up state tonight Also Aaron Aaron is staying up state tonight So he won't be coming back, but fail me home around the best saver in the world. What's top of my question?
Starting point is 00:30:56 In that question. Please. Why is this happening? And what? What are you doing? He's just spending half as much time in the house as you would be, rather twice as much time. Because sometimes they'll say, bloody hell,
Starting point is 00:31:10 Aaron's not been back for four nights. But Faye is sleeping like a lock up there. You know what I'm saying? You want to still have to always be that. Like this doesn't work with being like, can I go out with my friends more? You're like, no, you're fake. You've got to keep this lie up.
Starting point is 00:31:24 It'll be like Aaron's been at the house for four days, but they won't leave our front room. And it's like four days going deep into character. Wow, I wish Aaron would get back here. That's been ages. Where are you, Aaron? Don't you take off your big coat and hat by the way, fake? No, no, I'm fine. The costume is a coat and hat as well.
Starting point is 00:31:47 Like your parents wouldn't see you walking in wearing a hat and go, all right, Aaron, they're going like, man, he has this new person. Oh, quick, quick. Get the baseball bat that's an attacker in the house. Someone's coming with a hat and they look exactly like Aaron, but they're wearing a hat. I just think it might help things
Starting point is 00:32:06 about the try. What does rely on those a question we haven't talked about is is Aaron is going to make the rubber face mask. Yes, but yeah, is Aaron paying rent? I guess. Yeah. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, we were. Because if you're paying rent, you are with nothing. Yeah, do what you like. Yeah, and if you've got a job, then why aren't you paying rent?
Starting point is 00:32:36 Are you paying rents? I am. Yeah. I mean, it's discounted. Sure, it's a mate's rates. Yeah. It's a, yeah, it's a, it's a, it's a, it's a, almost mates.
Starting point is 00:32:46 I wish they were mates. I wish they were mates rates. Yeah, yeah. Because that, I think that might, that might prove an issue actually because if Faye moves in, they'll half the rent, but I don't think the parents would give Faye mates rates. So Aaron, Aaron might actually end up spending more.
Starting point is 00:33:04 Making more expensive. He's actually end up spending more. Make more expensive. He's actually done himself over there. And he's still spending the same amount of time with his parents. Yeah, just see someone else. So then Aaron's going to have to get a job as Faye to make up.
Starting point is 00:33:17 He's going to have to have a double job. He's going to get a second job. Double bubble on that. What as well? And then the parents will be like, Faye, why aren't you spending more time with us? And it's just going to be, and then Fae's going to have to write in. And this whole thing's just going to be live for the ice.
Starting point is 00:33:30 And it's only a matter of time before Aaron's mom sits him down and says, Darling, Fae, we love her. Yeah. When are you going to do the decent thing by her? We want to see you wed. And then suddenly there's a fight. I want to see her in that white big hat and that white big coat.
Starting point is 00:33:48 What can help you? Then suddenly you're buying a ring and Faye's got to come in and be like, ah, runny finally asked me. You can, you can miss his downfire, dinner with the family and a pitch meeting. We know that's possible. We've seen that in many of it. But you can't miss his fire the bride and groomer are wetting. You can try. You can try your best. I'd watch that film. Paint one half of yourself and just keep in turning around, Trek. I love the Faye suggestion, Tom. I think it's really, really strong. I don't think it helps Aaron in any way. I think it causes more problems for him than anything else.
Starting point is 00:34:30 There's still got to be the choice, right? Yeah, I feel like what we need to do here is just solve his problem, not create a rich fantasy world. Which is specifically balancing the living with parents but also getting to do what he wants as an adult. Go again with what was Aaron's where's he just be? Grad grad school. He just finished grad school, he's got a job and he's moved back in with his parents.
Starting point is 00:34:59 And what's his job? He does not say. I don't say. Great. So what if he starts doing fur that he's working fur? I assume he's in the mafia. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, well, this is what I'm saying. It's close to his family. What if he starts kind of making out that he's kind of either homeland security or FBI?
Starting point is 00:35:19 And then an imply that you're doing a Donnie Brasco, that you're having to go undercover to infiltrate the mob. So you still get to wear a big coat of hat. So whatever happens, you want prosthetics involved. That big, that big coat of hat isn't going to waste now, but like what it means is you can be like, I'm on the job.
Starting point is 00:35:43 You can still use the outfit you've bought. And then you don't have to lie because with those kind of things, it's what isn't said. When you're an undercover agent and you don't want people to know, there's a couple of things, you know, you keep paper diaries, for example, because you burn the evidence. You don't have online diaries, you can't be traced. You know, you own lots of hats this time. I'm just saying. You do two podcasts a week.
Starting point is 00:36:10 LAUGHTER Is there any trace of you? LAUGHTER Yeah, but Lorraine Kelly style, am I Tom? Or am I Tom? He's probably. Yeah, of course. When the tax man comes knocking, you neither.
Starting point is 00:36:28 Yeah. And the other thing as well is, what about this? You know, like they say this about relationships that if you feel like you are sort of drifting apart, you've got to go back to sort of what made you great in the first place. And you know with with with couples they say you know make make time for each other do date nights. Well you should do stuff you should like twice a month right where you go we're gonna really you know it's not just gonna be I'm gonna be in the same house as you eating dinner.
Starting point is 00:37:01 You know looking at my phone while you read the paper, we're actually going to go and do something. Twice a month's not that big. And especially if you did stuff like the things you used to do as kids, like trips to the cinema or stuff like that, that would be, that would be a really fun thing to do with your parents. I mean, I'm not doing it, but I've not got the same problem. I live in my own house. That's a really good idea.
Starting point is 00:37:23 I just wondered like what, when he's's gonna wear the big coat and hat? Well, how does that fit in? He's trying to get his ex-rated movies. It makes him just as aggressive as it adults. He's on his dad's shoulders. I love that that's always what he used to do with his dad as well. His dad was like, yeah, let's go watch some porn. Smuggle into a dirty movie.
Starting point is 00:37:43 Like the old days. I think it's scheduling. I think the paper calendar was a good idea. And then just being like, look, I'll be home on this day. And then they know that you will be. And then it's fine that you're not this week, because they know you're there at the weekend. I think also they need to let you be an adult. But it might be nice if I'm new. Or just one in a really big coat.
Starting point is 00:38:18 I suggest he like cooks them once a week. Let's his turn to cook them a meal. Yeah that's that's my parents will be listening to this being like, well, you don't fucking do that for us. I don't know. I suggest it is now me. Yeah, good one. Cookie. Meal, take him out to the pictures, you know, like, yeah, or alternative.
Starting point is 00:38:38 The problem I think with the whole Aaron Fae thing is that what if you're getting a sort of Tyler Durden situation where he's forced to kill to kill one of half of his persona. Yeah. You know, you don't want that. And then you get to star in a Netflix documentary anyway, because they'll make like a little true crime about like who kill Fae. And then you get your Netflix special. Sorry, this is only if he's a comedian that he'd care about this,
Starting point is 00:39:04 but it's one way of doing it. Ever wants a Netflix special, whether a comedian or not, of course they do. Right. You tell him that a Tinder Swindler's not delighted. Of course he is. Oh my God, and then you could even be like the murderer and the murderie in the same documentary.
Starting point is 00:39:19 You could be victim and murderer. You'd have true crime sewn up, wouldn't you? Absolutely. That's got like an eight parts, but should be a three part podcast series. Buy yourself a second hat and become a detective as well. Yes. And the documentary filmmaker,
Starting point is 00:39:35 and then you can get a podcast and like you say, that's where the money is. So there you go Simon, and then you can buy your own house. It's all sewn up. Beef solved. Beef solved. Beef from the starting out sewn up. Beef solved. Beef solved. Beef from the sorting at your beef!
Starting point is 00:39:46 Beef solved! This is Dog Treat Beef from Mike. via beefbrotherspodcast.com. Please do get in touch. Here we go. Dear Ben, Tom, Matthew and guest, in order of who most likely likes dogs. Do you have a dog, Abby?
Starting point is 00:40:07 No. None of us do, so no, he's not like anyone's, anyone's got the advice. My mom and dad won't let me. I'm obsessed with them though, like quite fashionably, so I'd like to claim that. How does your obsession manifest itself? I once went to a season of land, the dog whisperer show at the O2 and as the only one there without a dog
Starting point is 00:40:30 I did the same thing where I went to this kid show Yeah, I was like live dog training on the stage and everyone was learning for their dog I was just there because it's big fat at the dog whisperer.er. Well, this is another one that is perfect for you then. I have a dog treat related beef, right, Safa and Mike. My wife and I have recently moved back in with her parents as we approached the birth of our first child. This is common practice in Japan to give birth in your hometown
Starting point is 00:41:00 with the support of your parents. I should say that Mike is in Japan, rather than him just throwing in a little fact about Japan. He's like, they do in Japan, okay? In Japan. Luckily, I get on really well with my in-laws. However, the way my father-in-law spoils our dog, one year old Westie for those who care.
Starting point is 00:41:17 I do. Abby, has me concerned for the future. Normally, we use treats as a training tool, but he gives them out like Willy Wonka on a factory tour. Apart from the health concerns, it teaches bad habits. On a separate point, he also seems to only want to enjoy the good parts of dog ownership.
Starting point is 00:41:37 EG, playing with the dog and working up into a frenzy, but they're not wanting to take her out on walks when I can't. I know it's our dog, and I don't expect him to be walking her all the time, but it's a little annoying that he goes against how we normally care for her. What is the best way to bring this up? Language is not a problem, but culturally the father figure, as the head of the house, is still strong in Japan, and I don't want to offend.
Starting point is 00:42:00 Also considering we'll be having a child soon, I'm worried this behaviour will also happen when looking after his grandchild, yours in Christ, Mike in Japan. I'll tell you now, Mike, it will, there's fuck all you can do about it. Anyway, I'd like to hear the rest of your opinions on this. Well, so as a dog training expert, having been to the O2 season Milan dog whisper live show, which I was disappointed in because there weren't actually any dogs in the show. It was just a GoPro. What? Yeah. Is the only reason I wasn't. Anyway, I was just. Wait, wait, wait, wait, sorry, just to back up the track a second. Yeah. So it's a GoPro like taking the place of it, like what like on some sort of like rumble
Starting point is 00:42:39 something. Yeah. So he was being like, to like a little GoPro, he was like acting out what he'd do and say that you saw it from the dog's perspective. And I was like, I don't give a shit about the dog's perspective. I want to see the dog. But also, we weren't proofing it was her. Was it on a remote controlled car or something? What was the GoPro on? I think it was just like on a stick.
Starting point is 00:42:59 And was someone operating the stick? A dog. But the dog was fetching the sticks, certainly. I think even maybe he was holding the stick. It was really low budget for an arena tour, I won't lie. And I was frustrated as I wasn't there for the dog training tips. I was without a dog. I was there to watch some dogs perform little tricks on the stage. Because he like, he has like a pack. He's like a pack leader and he has all these dogs.
Starting point is 00:43:30 And I was like, the pack's gonna be there. Daddy, the dog is gonna be there. This is such niche dog whisper knowledge. But oh my god, daddy is legit. Hang on, he's called one of the dogs Daddy. Yeah. And then one of his first tips is to make them know that you're the leader. Yes. You have to be the leader of your park. So why is he called someone daddy then?
Starting point is 00:43:50 That's a good thing. That's something that's shocking to see. He's got an impressive. Yeah. It's like, oh, this is big chief in charge. And now I'm going to jab him in the neck until he doesn't think he's in charge. You can't be taking the leader on a dog called daddy, right? Because he's the daddy. But then he's like, no, because then he's in charge. You can't be taking the lead on a dog called daddy, right? Because he's the daddy. Why didn't I finish? Well, he's like, no, because then he's the grand daddy.
Starting point is 00:44:10 Like, he, he, he's the, he created the statesman. And also as well, Tom, Tom, how often in your household, do you feel like you are completely in control? Oh, never. Yeah, and you're the daddy, yeah. Oh, it's a very you're the daddy, yeah In description of what a daddy is last week glory figured out that Jane sometimes corpse me Tom and say now Oh, yeah, when she wants to look to be in the eyes and goes Tom I say no, no, I'm daddy and she goes Tom
Starting point is 00:44:42 Daddy Daddy Oh, I'm... Do you insist on daddy? Is that? Daddy, yeah. Oh, no. Daddy, mumbley daddy. I went to the car factory today, and they'd labeled all of the sections really normally. It was like nephew, granddad, uncle, and then it was daddy. I don't think that should be the general section of the card factory. I think we should go dad. There's gotta be it.
Starting point is 00:45:02 There must be dads, right? Because on Father's Day, I'm not getting my dad a card that says daddy on it. Exactly. What age does daddy become not okay? I mean, when you're like a, you know, like a small child, I say six or seven, you probably shift to, I mean, actually, no, my daughter calls me dad now,
Starting point is 00:45:19 and she's in the 83, she's sort of, I was like that. It's daddy or dad, but I think it's, yeah, dad's probably. Is it ever Matthew? Is it ever Matthew? Yeah, all the time. Yeah, it's bad. It's bad.
Starting point is 00:45:30 Cross me. It's not me. It's not me. There was a lot of things I don't know. I don't know if I've mentioned this on the podcast before where she learned everybody's names. So she, you would say, what's Granny's name?
Starting point is 00:45:42 It's Mary. What's, what's Daddo's name? That's my dad. It's Stuart. You'd say, what's my name name, it's Mary, what's Daddo's name, that's my dad, it's Stuart. You'd say, what's my name, it's your Matthew, what you could say, she didn't say your Matthew or your daddy Crosby. And then, and I've got no idea where this came from, I would say, and what's Mummy's name,
Starting point is 00:45:55 and she'd say, watermelon sugar high. And we're not Harry Styles fans in the house, we don't play that song to it, I don't know where she's heard it from, but for some reason not only heard the phrase Wat Manashigahai, but as I think it's my wife's name. This is her own mother's name, it's Wat Manashigahai. I do not think the dis about from that fact. I love it. It's great. It's great. It's a good household. Great. That ain't cross-brewing what managed to get hired. It's a good household.
Starting point is 00:46:25 But we should solve this problem for our friend, Mike, in Japan. I mean, it's true. You know, your grandparents, you are, or the grandparents, your parents, if they're looking after your kid, you are grateful for their help, but you can't really micromanage grandparenting.
Starting point is 00:46:45 You just have to let them do it. That's the problem. And I think actually, Has it parented a dog before though? But I think this is a good lesson for Mike to just learn that, listen, grandparents do get the fun stuff. But they've also had, they've had all the shit stuff
Starting point is 00:47:00 of parenting, you know? They do get all the fun bits, the trips to the park, you know, they're given them sweets, they're given back to you when they, you know, they haven't napt and they're over tired and they're going berserk and you have to deal with it because they have to deal with it when their parents did. This is just, this is the circle of life. This is what, I think, actually, makes some peace with it now, Mike, because it's going to get much much much worse when it is your own offspring. It's... It's...
Starting point is 00:47:29 It's bleak advice, but it's honest advice. It's solid advice out the straight out the blow. Tell you what it does do crucially, is it takes the heat off you. Yeah. That old Japanese dude isn't gonna be sitting around thinking, is that guy good enough for my daughter? What's he up to now? Is he earning enough?
Starting point is 00:47:48 What's his job? He's gonna just be thinking, whoa, look at that dog. And look at that kid, brilliant, a dog and a kid. And that guy's brought this into my life. And now my life's brilliant, because I just get to play with dogs and kids. And I've got no responsibility. And at no point is he going to be thinking,
Starting point is 00:48:05 are you good enough? Any more? You've put that to one side. No, that's such good. And you know what you should do, actually Mike, lean into it mate, lean into it. When the child is born, you know, you'll get a lot of gifts, you'll get lots of baby clothes, all that kind of stuff. But give him a gift. Give him a little tiny saddle that you can put on the back of the dog and put the kid on the saddle. And go, there you go. You're playing with the dog, you're playing with the kid, you can take him out for walks
Starting point is 00:48:38 together. Yeah. Be solved. It's beef solved. Be from the starting of your beef! Be solved! Abby have you got one of your beef! Be solved! Abby, have you got one of your own that you're not sure?
Starting point is 00:48:47 I do have a beef. My beef though is with when I have to stay at my boyfriends. Also acceptable, yeah. Because he doesn't own a wardrobe. And instead has a floor drove. He does have a chest of drawers. They are empty. A drawer is drove. So he keeps his jumpers in a cardboard box. The rest is on the floor.
Starting point is 00:49:20 He has a dirty laundry basket and a clean laundry basket, which is very difficult to tell the difference between. And that's mostly where he keeps the clothes, unless they're on the floor. Can I ask a question? Does he have like a sort of flat slash apartment, or is he hopping box cars? Is that what's he doing? Is he living on the railroads with a binoculars bag? You think so, right? No, he has a flat. He has a flat share. But yeah, it's just him and his room.
Starting point is 00:49:54 What's his bed situation? Is he mattress on the floor as well? Because he feels like a mattress on the floor, kind of dude. No, it's a bed without a headboard. Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's like an old bed that his mum's given him to use. Sure, sure. And a donated mattress and the bed's never made, obviously. No, he's never finished the mattress. And he has two lots of bedding, but they're identical, so you never
Starting point is 00:50:17 know if he's changed. So this is the person you would like to move in with one day, so this has to be solved. Yeah, well yeah, that's probably a big issue. Has he got a chair? Yeah, it's a wooden one. I wonder if putting the clothes on a chair might be like just a baby step towards. Okay, so your're misunderstanding here, is that the chair is full. Oh, right, okay. You're a more close than a chair's one.
Starting point is 00:50:52 We're gonna need a park bench. Maybe I should get in my bench. Get in my bench. I tell you what my mum did once, when I was slightly older at a living at home, and my room was very untidy. She bought some beers and hid them around the room underneath the stuff that I'd had lying around.
Starting point is 00:51:16 She kept saying, you get a tidy, like she kept like pushing that untidy in the room. It took me ages to realize where there was a real lovely tree. Like it grown up Easter egg hunt. Maybe I should start hiding like gross stuff. So he's like has to find where the smells coming from. But my worry is he would just leave the smells.
Starting point is 00:51:36 I think he would have sleep in the smelly room. He opens the window. That was probably his thing. You'd find him for breathing a big pile of clothes on a chair. I think that's not, you know. Yeah. Don't want to stick an egg in that. And yeah, I think, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I,'re there say look I think that would I think
Starting point is 00:52:07 that would go great in your room and just sort of basically press the issue as hard as you can until he gets it. How do you train him to then use it? Like I said the Chester Draw is empty. I think you need a series of treats to reward good behaviour. Yeah, maybe like get a clicker. Every time it's like, day I'll squirt with a little war bowl. And then every time he puts something on a hanger, I give him a chocolate. Yeah, that's right. And then jamming it inside.
Starting point is 00:52:39 And then I go jamming inside. I dig the guy's vibe, I must admit. I've never been a wardrobe I've never been a wardrobe man myself and He's not a he's not a three walls and a door kind of guy He's a three walls Three on a TV set three walls and a door That's how you make a wardrobe. Oh, sorry.
Starting point is 00:53:06 I'm sorry, I thought you meant, oh, it's just sorry, it just seems you meant a room. Sorry, sorry. No, no, no, it keeps his clothes in the room. Sure, that's not the issue. Sure, for now. The walls of the wardrobe, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:53:18 But, yeah. I don't want to take it to make a wardrobe, guys, but it's famously three walls in the door. Um, I, sounds very sturdy, I'll tell you to make a wardrobe, guys, but it's famously three walls in the doors. Um, I... Sounds very sturdy, I'll tell you that much. You might have a good choice. How you gonna break a wardrobe, actually, it's really... I'm recording.
Starting point is 00:53:34 It's where I'm recording from. I'm breaking a wardrobe. Sorry, with a fashed roof. So, um, what you do is you get a bunk bed. Yes. So, what you do is you get a bunk bed. Yes. And you have no mattress on the top bunk, and then the top bunk becomes like a de facto
Starting point is 00:53:54 storage shelf wardrobe type thing. And then it's up off the floor, sure it's above your head, when you sleep. Okay, but then my beef is, my boyfriend has a bunk bed. And that is a whole new egg. In Tom's defense, it could start to look like he's got a four-post-a-bed.
Starting point is 00:54:15 Thank you. If he wears a lot of red velvet and it hangs over the sides. Almost like a quilted. He's like, it's just a quilt up there. Either that or tell him to go, you know, the full Steve Jobs and pick an outfit by three of them, have them in rotation and just wear that every day. Yes, like I've got one capsule wardrobe.
Starting point is 00:54:36 Exactly, go capsule wardrobe, yeah. If he's not willing to actually buy actual wardrobe, then minimize, you know, if he looks good in, I don't know, white t-shirt, jeans and trainers, then just get him, you know, if he looks good in, I don't know, white t-shirt, jeans and trainers, then just get him, you know, get a bunch of those, don't talk about that much space. I mean... That's the thing, that's all he seems to wear anywhere.
Starting point is 00:54:52 There we go. There we go, right? Because always clothes are on the floor. He's never wearing them, he's never wearing them. Well, I mean, you know, the choice is yours. What, you know, you can go for, you can go for the bunk bed, you can go for the, the cabin bed, you can go for sticking some dirt in his clothes. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:13 I'll leave that up to you. I'll let you know. Please do. Please do. Please do. Kill right in. Like, I have some beef with my girlfriend. She keeps hiding eggs in my clothes.
Starting point is 00:55:26 And she's bought me a bug of that. Beef from the sorting egg of beef! Thanks so much for coming on the podcast. I'm so much for having me. A tremendous joy having you on. It's been really, really great. So tell people about where they can hear you can see you. Obviously your socials.
Starting point is 00:55:44 Yeah, I'm at Abbey Clark comedy, I spent ABI and Clark with an E on all socials. Really? I'm on Instagram mostly, but I'm everywhere else too. And it's not that. No, you're hosting the brilliant podcast as well, but I'm really enjoying. Yeah, well, I am currently hosting the It's Wagger for Christie podcast, all about the Waggerama between Rebecca Vardy and Colleen Rooney, which is insane.
Starting point is 00:56:17 And we're like doing live, I did it just before this one, like every day after court, we have a little recap and I talked to like lawyers and court Journalists, but then also like entertainment journalists today. We had a media and PR management company who literally deals with Celebrities when they get canceled so like when there's a celebrity scandal they ring her and go help and she like when there's a celebrity scandal they ring her and go help and she basically makes the plan on like how they should apologise and what TV shows they should go on and what charities they should help and all to help.
Starting point is 00:56:54 What's the final number? Yes, you get to talk to all these people and kind of find out all the GC details you might not just get from the Guardians article on the piece. It's great, it's really, really good, I'm really enjoying it. And that's on BBC Sounds. So on BBC Sounds or wherever you find your podcasts, yeah, it's with Radio 5 Live. And I get to present it like a true crime podcast which is all I've ever wanted Say yeah, that's that's the fun at the moment. What do you think's gonna happen?
Starting point is 00:57:29 I know obviously this is the whole the whole purpose of your podcast is sort of eakin out this But what do you think? Yeah, how's it gonna go? I think Rebecca is gonna win it. Yeah, I think so as well because What they have to prove without having Caroline what, who the agent who said I did it. Without her there, it's so difficult to prove that Rebecca knew Caroline was doing it,
Starting point is 00:57:56 which is what they're trying to prove. They're trying to prove as if it were a hit man. They're okay, Rebecca didn't pull the trigger, but she was fully aware in part of the planning. But to prove that is so difficult, especially without Caroline, what they're. And so I don't think they're really going to be able to undeniably prove her guilty, but at the end of the day, all she's going to get is money that's not going to actually cover the legal fees she's spent. And I think Colleen has won in the public. Well, her reputation is basically kind of...
Starting point is 00:58:27 Because all of the things that she's made so much worse. She's definitely done this sort of thing, if not this actual thing, right? Yeah. She's definitely done stuff around this. So yeah, but it's a great podcast and it's well worth checking out. Thank you. That wasn't advice for you, Abbi Aure, aren't it? Yeah, I had to listen to it a bit. You could. Thanks so much for coming on the podcast. See you really soon, I hope. Thank you. There we go. Beef solved. Once again. A lot of beef solved there, yes. If you enjoyed Abby and you would like to hear more from her
Starting point is 00:59:05 They'll be a bonus beef over on our Patreon in a couple of days time. So patreon.com forward slash pappies flat share Thank you very much to everyone who's already joined the patreon. It's much appreciated and I do check out as well It was Wagon the Christie podcast on BBC sounds if you get a chance. I As of the time of recording. I'm up date on all the episodes and it's really good. It's really, it's got, it's all the thrill of those, you know, the kind of podcast that follow a courtroom drama, but the story itself is not too bleak, you know. Have you picked a side, have you picked a side cross me? Well, it's a tricky one because like you, you know, you hear a lot about Rebecca Vardy and the sort of things that she's done. I mean, I, I, I don't know, it's, I,
Starting point is 00:59:57 I feel like Rebecca Vardy, like, has probably done some things that are not exactly great. I think her agent certainly has, but her agent's not around to sort of answer for it. But I don't know. I mean, I think most people are gonna side with Colleen just because people like someone with a bit of a sort of ingenuity. The scheme of it is what's exciting, isn't it? Well personally, she didn't tell anyone about the scheme, she just did it on her own,
Starting point is 01:00:26 didn't even tell Wayne Rooney about it. Just did it on her own and slowly whittled down the people she thought it could be to who she thought it was. It's good. It's good stuff. It's compelling. What were you going to say the thing about it was? Well I was going to say personally I'm an Abbey Clark site.
Starting point is 01:00:42 Of course, yeah. Of course, yeah. We all are. we all are. We all are. So yeah, listen to that. Enjoy that wherever you get your podcasts. Anything else to say? Any other business?
Starting point is 01:00:53 I don't think so. Today's episode was produced by a producer Gwyn. Producer Gwyn still, yes, yeah. Get well soon. Gwyn. Get well soon, Gwyn. And cheers everyone. Bye.
Starting point is 01:01:01 Get us in caution and cheers everyone. Bye!

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