Pappy's Flatshare - Beef Brothers Cold Cuts w/ Brona C Titley S9E31

Episode Date: October 29, 2019

The Beef Brothers are here to sort out your beef with special guest Brona C TitleyBrona C Titley - https://twitter.com/bronactitleyPappy’s - https://twitter.com/pappystweetIf you have a flatshare based beef you'd like us to solve then send it to [e-mail] us live20th November at The Phoenix - https://www.tickettext.co.uk/pappys-flatshare/pappys-flatshare-slamdown-20112019/Support us on Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/pappysflatshareProduced by Emma Corsham Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Do you want to see what the world is really like? Yes. Four things is deliciously funny and spectacularly entertaining. A woman plotting her course to freedom at a lot for... It's non-stop bonkers brilliance. I love that. Four things. It's like theaters December 15th.

Greetings, listener dear! Here's Thomas. Here's Ben. And here's Matholum you. Yes, only Clarky they're refusing to go full front name. Yeah, never. We all know his full name is Benkent. What? Benkent. It's a shock to the system. It's what, three o'clock in the afternoon. Ben just pointed to me, I am wearing odd shoes. You are wearing odd shoes. How was that audition this morning? I know I had an audition. I have been to two different jobs today before this. This is my league's professional engagement. So Tom, you're wearing two different sets of running shoes as well, aren't you?

Yeah, so I've got one of my, I'm one's newer than the other, so maybe my left foot will be faster than my right. You're wearing a circle. A romantic thought. Anyway, we've just finished a beef brother's house meeting. No. Anyway, we've just visited... OK, Tom, I'll tell you what. I'll tell you what, Tom.

Let me hand this. Welcome to an episode of Beef Brothers Cold Carts. Now, Brian, stop working. The way this episode works is we get beefs from you, the listener, and we try and solve them. Flat share-based beefs. And if you would like to join in with the conversation, then please do.

Oh, thank you, Tom. Yes. Isn't it? And please do. It is that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We'll give you a right going over. We got through two beefs in this episode, and both guys got an absolute roasting.

Unfortunately. We have a brilliant guest this week in Brona Titli. Brona C. Titli. What is the taste? The Seas Dan 4, you'll find out during the episode. Yes, follow her on Twitter if you enjoy her. She's at Brona C. Titli, or one word. Yes, she's brilliant.

She's a fantastic performer, a fantastic comedy writer, and also a fantastic friend, fantastic comedy writer and also a fantastic friend to us. So enjoy the episode and we'll see you on the other side. Love you. Well, if you've got a problem, I'm calling a problem, if you've got a problem call me a bee. If you've got a bee, maybe we can help you be from the sorting out your bees. Waller. Waller, yeah, yeah, absolutely Beef Brothers cold cuts Here we are sorting out the listeners' beefs And here to sort out those beefs as today

Is Friend of the Show Can you be a friend of the show if you're wrong for the first time? Just get to the bit where you say my name's Yeah, I can be adorable It's Bruno Tidley everyone Yay! That's finally happening It's the Bronan and Pappies Bron Papis, Bronan Papis, orgy.

He thought I was gonna say show, but I made a dirty ride away. I mean you were gonna say all the... She composes, she sits, she's dirty. I know. The complete package. And I have a mid initial that you left out. Oh, it's C, that's right. Will we be able to guess what your middle name is?

Have we, I mean, we've been friends for a long time. Has this never come up? No, I don't think so. This is so offensive. So it's bruner seatedly. Yeah. Is it an Irish middle name? Oh, it couldn't be more Irish-made.

Oh, really? We are talking vowels come on out of your key. Does it? Does it sound like it begins with a different letter? Yeah. But you know that the Irish language would work? All right, okay. Okay, I'm gonna go for Belinda.

Yeah, you got it. I mean, I thought I'd smashed it. I thought I'd smashed it. I thought you know what, I thought we were gonna get a good 20 minutes out of that. Sorry. I'm in a initial, but. I think there's a problem with that format, really.

Tom came in here and unfortunately we have nothing else to talk about. So we're just... Sorry, I see these studios. I'm gonna say Belinda over and over again. I was gonna say... It's like, Queever? I was gonna say Queever. Shut, we have had this conversation.

This is no way you were gonna guess Queever. No, we have the... Oh! There's a pretend... Don't... Wreck this studio just because you got excited. Don't smash it up. Ben, the way you point to people is very aggressive. Oh, those are pretend don't wreck the studio just because you got excited. I'm not sure that.

Ben, the way you point at people is very aggressive. And then it's quite slapstick. It is, it is clever. It is Quiver, but Tom was the only one who made that fun by saying Belinda and not the actual name. I was going to say Karla. Well now let's make it fun. Let's make it fun by spelling Quiver.

Yes, that is a good game. See, I've got a friend. 10 time. 10 time. That's that. I. Oh, Regina Moji. Japanese flag.

We got it. Yeah, that's it. That's it. That's it. It is obviously guys. C-A-O-I-M-H-E, Quiver. Beautiful. Thank you, thank you so much.

So, do you know that was my name when I was born? So, my parents didn't call me Prona, they called me Quiver. And then they had six months of calling me Quiver. And people just kept mispronouncing it and misballing it to such an extent that my mother had to break down when I was six months old. It was like we're calling the little shit, Brona. And I've been on your name.

Yeah. Wow, I was Brona any part of your name? Was it your name? No, I was Quiever, Tidley. They brought Brona in. They trucked that bad girl in after six months. In case of emergency, kind of break glass. Yeah, that was it. Okay, kind of break glass. Yeah, it was.

Okay, she's grown up. Okay. And Brona is spelled C, Pantyne. Over-Sign emoji. Japanese flag. Full stop. Thank you, Ben. Full stop, full stop. And if you name.

So, did you have a middle name? Were you queer for something? And has there... Is it like a middle night now just laying dormant in some sort of middle name graveyard somewhere? It's a great question. Thank you so much for asking. It's my first question.

So the first thing that happened was that I decided to be pretentious and take a mid-initial. Because when I heard the story of the first six months of my life spent at Queever, I was like, well, I have to commemorate that in my name somehow. And so, Homer J Simpson was big at the time. Michael J Fox, you know those guys. So I decided to be grown as C-tidley, but another fun thing that happens in Ireland as well as the overuse of vowels is you know forced nationwide Catholicism. So I also had to make my holy confirmation.

That's right. You've got to be a cop. All right, this time you get a whole other name which can be any name in the whole world so long as it has was had by a saint. Yeah, one of the saint's names. Yeah, we talked about this before. Yeah, you choose your own. And you choose your own. But the priest has to say, yeah, your name. I approve. So at this point, I'm Brona, Quiva, Titli. No other Brona, Quiva, Titli's in Ireland. It's a strong name.

It's got the word Titianish. What's not to know? Yeah, it is. And so I was like, what can make that weirder? So I took the saints name, Esolt. So officially, I'm Brona Quiva, Esolt, Tirtly. Wow, my God. Is Esolt the saint that wrote the Fables? Am I confused? That's Esolt. That's Esolt.

Esolt is the patron saint of Northern condiments. That's right. Yeah, yeah. Online condiments. Online condiments. We're the patron saint of podcasts. Cool. We're in the right place.

Oh my god. How are these microphones are for? Yeah, absolutely. Oh, I'm afraid, yeah, this is a podcast. Oh my god, okay. I genuinely was wondering. Thank you so much for explaining. When you saw three white guys of microphones,

you thought, what could this be? LAUGHTER So, it's either a podcast or a political party. It's either a podcast or how they just hang out every single day. And it turns out it's both. It is, yeah, it's really much. It's really maybe see each other. So what kind of a house mate, flat mate are you?

What is your current living arrangements? Oh my god, I live with my partner of 10 years. We've lived together for eight years and I am a delight So much of pleasure to have a red nose. I can believe that. I mean imagine waking up in the morning to this little face You know adorable just adorable my golden hair lights the room No need for sunlight or electricity. We don't have one. You don't have all those sad lamps No, wake up next to brona, slowly the day will become bright. Exactly.

And so no, I think I'm very good. In fact, I'm so too good, Haysmeet. I feel I'm so good at sharing. That I'm currently sharing my body with a stranger. In that I'm seven months pregnant with it, some kid I've never met. That's true. So you've got an extra flatmates.

That's right, yeah. And that is a good Hays flatmates. That's right. Yeah. Are they a good house mate? No. No. I would say that if any other house mate caused me daily nausea, exhaustion, indigestion, spontaneous weeping, leg cramps, funny daggers, I would kick them. I lived with Tom and he, all of yeah he ticks all of those box yeah you get some many days yeah daddy daggers was my nickname for him yeah funny dadgers are you gonna reek revenge by giving them an unplanetable Irish name yeah

well I'm very cigarette I definitely want to get because we've to live in this shit hole of a country in my right. I definitely want them to have an Irish name. Yes. But I do want an Irish name like Brona that is spelt like it sounds. And I want it to be quite unusual. So that's my trifecta of criteria. Right.

So articulate. And it's a hard name. It's trifecta of the name by the way. And trifecta is the name. trifecta C Titsuria, which is my surname and my partner's surname, but together. No, but you know what we call the baby actually, because my family in Ireland, I'm from Ireland, I don't know if that came up. Oh wow, what a tie.

What the island? They're vibes. It's like the moment of reveal when I noticed my phone. My family in Ireland, I told them that I like Irish names, so then they all kind of nicknamed the baby like really terrible Irish names, like Lausorena, and the one that we've landed on. So now we just every day refer to the unborn child as Gubnet, which is spelled G-O-B-N-A-I-T, and is a legitimate Irish name.

Gubnet. Gubnet. Gubnet. Yeah, so I'd a legit Irish name. Gubb-N-T. Gubb-N-T. Yeah, so I'd be like, oh, Gubb-N-T's kicking. I do like the idea of giving it a really gross name, because any name you pick up to Gubb-N-T is going to be going, but the thing is, do you not think, you know, when it comes down to it, you're going to be like, it's Gubb-N-T. We've been calling it Gubb-N-T for so long.

I just look now and see Gubb-N-T. You expecting, you know what you're expecting yet? Yeah, yeah, baby. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years.

We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years.

We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a couple of years. We've been calling her a girl. Wow. Yeah. This is a lovely. Little has of girls. Is, is, is, is, is, is Gopnett in Ireland? Is that a, is that a girl's name or a, a boy's name?

I mean, it traditionally. I think that's a child abuse name. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. I don't think, I don't think anyone actually has it, but traditionally it's a girl's name yet. Wow, wow. Yeah, a beautiful little girl's called Gopnett. Gopnett.

Well, this is a few odd Gopnets. Be in touch. Yeah, a beautiful little girl's called Gubnish. Gubnish. What a country. Well, listen to this. If you are a Gubnish, be in touch. Yeah. Any Gubnish please, please, if you abbreviate it, you will find out. We will really hurt their feelings. We will find out.

OK, sorry, Gubnish. If you're a Gubnish and you love your name, do get in touch. Beefbrotherspodcastatgmail.com. Should we start with the family beef? This one says respectfully a family beef. Oh, yeah. As you're about to have one. Yeah. Let's talk about family. Okay, I, this is from Tony. Yeah. It's the Irish way. It's just good bargain, you know, one labour, 14 children. That's good. point. Which is good Catholicism. So, respectfully a family beef.

This is from Tony. He says, hello, I regard having a home full of family is equally valid as a flat-based beef. So do we. Absolutely right. How is it? Did he expect us to argue with that? Because we're with you, Tony.

Apparently he had. He says, this is the 21st century. So let's get with the program then. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Tony is turning on an aggressive note. Back in the 20th century, no families. No, it's like, famously.

It's a new concept, isn't it? No families in the flat. Sort of like what you call those things that's been. Fidget spinners. Fidget spinners and families. That's what we do. That's what 2019 is all the way. The 20th century was just a single person and a spinning top.

That's why I far we've come. Yeah, century before that, no person, but just a wheel. We're only getting self-doubted. Well, Tony writes, I'm really upset by his tone, actually. He's continuing his vein. Matthew is crying. No, I've really upset. He says, get with the programmer. So here's a slow roast. It's something that I'm joined to tickle your agony fancies. Oh, he's turned it around. For as long as my children can remember, we have had a dishwasher in the house, bracket, not for them the painful memories

of having to wash everything by hand after a meal. Absolutely. One of the worst times in our house was trying to work out who's doing the washing up. Did you have a, did you have like a roto system in the house? No, it was on things like behaviour and I would get lost in. Oh, wow. And always the big debate of who's going to wash up, who's going to dry up and who's going to put away.

Three different jobs. And I have many kids in your family. Four. So does one person just get to sit and watch? Pretty much. And my right hand, thinking the youngest, the favourite. He's ever on favourite, though. And the lovely guy.

No, I think drawing was seen as the worst task. Really? I think drawing is the worst task, man. Yeah, because it's a job that air does for you and tying. You know, why, what you're not? You have to make sure you have to get the suds out. You have to be drawing before it gets to go pull. So, you, you animal, you've got a rinse.

Should be suds on it in the first place. I was 10 years old. This is 10 year old, I'm one of them. I'm one of them, I say mom, dad, where's our rinsing there been? What? That was actually the name of Ben Tess. The rinsing there didn't mean where the hangers lived. You got your sink full of washing up liquid.

You've got the place where you stack washing. You've got a sink full of washing up liquid. You've got the place where you stack the washing. You've got a sink full of washing up liquid. Yeah, but that's not what I'm going to be. That's it. Okay. You know, there's your sink. There's the washing up liquid with the bubbles. There's the dry and wreck. Right.

Where you rinse in the tap. And then a tap, yeah. Into the washing up bin. Yeah. Where it depends, yeah. What do you mean, it depends. Into the sink. You're off the bowl or whatever it is, yeah, it depends. It depends. It depends. It depends. It depends.

It depends. It depends. It depends. Either you have it on hot, small stream, going into the bowl, but once the bowl gets full, normally then I put it on cold and put it in the neutral place between bowl and where's the neutral place? And what is the point of the bowl? Either if you've got one of those mini

sinks this was the 1980s do you put it down the side down the side of the bowl wait you weren't 10 years old in the 90s is I defense is falling apart of things next you'll be mentioning the cane that he wants to put in my... God, see. That was tiny tin. I think that washing dishes is a delightful task. I love it. And I think it's interesting as well that your parents set it up as a punishment. Maybe that's what they did wrong. Yeah.

I think isn't the idea that you make it... You make all of the chores around the house a little bit of fun. Or you give a fine, actually, incentive. To the rinsing bin Can we talk about the ball for a second? So you have a sink right which is bowl shaped Yes, and then you put another bowl inside that. Which makes your washing space smaller. And then you put a third bowl inside that bowl.

And then you wash a bowl in that bowl. So what's going on here? Some sort of Russian dolls, situations. Russian balls. You take the bowl out the sink if you need to use the sink as just the sink sink. I don't have a back pin. Like if you need to wash a baby or... I don't have a washing up bowl.

I just don't do it any more. Straighten the you need to watch a baby or... Yeah. I don't have a washing up bowl. I just don't do it straight in the sink. Well done. You've got six sinks. You've got like a drum for six. You've got like a drum for six. He's got a sink kit. He's got a sink kit. Yeah, it's cool.

I love that show. I think you could get a job in Cirque du Soleil. There's a guy who played six sinks over the audience. Finally, a job. Oh, you did. Well, you could just get a job in Cirque du Soleil because you're funny looking face. Well, there's a very funny face.

Clarke, you don't pull a face, no one can see it. It's an audio, famously an audio podcast. Yeah, put it back, put your face back in the... Stop, I'm a stupid face. So Tony continues. However, despite many years of me stocking the dishwasher in the most sensible space-filling manner, we can see where this is going.

Everyone else still insists on putting glasses in the cup section, cups in the glasses section, mixing smaller large plates in the same rack and Christ save us. Oh God. Laying spoons next to knives next to forks in random order instead of laying cutlery out in designated sections. Oh God. Right. You know who would be fun on a night out? Totally. Totally. Totally. She would be fun on a night out. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally.

Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally.

Totally. Totally. Totally. She would be fun on a night out. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally. Totally right down the toilet and then it comes back up and that's how he knows she's really, she's really a still alive, that's leaving the enemy, isn't it? What? Is this a Pixar film?

Oh, I remember it's a horror film. I cannot remember this one. It's where the enemy puts a load of balloons on his house. Yes, and they go up. And it's a great film called Sleep with the Enemy. Yeah, yeah. What was the bit and sleep with the enemy? All I remember is he has his cupboards or like tin stacked

in like colour section and alphabetical. Colourful, it is here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Kind of very OCD kind of way of approaching stacking. And that's why Julia Roberts went off and had to go and eat pray love. Yes. Yes, exactly. It does seem like real shame that she ate pralove.

He was such a lovely guy. What a ratter. What a ratter. What a ratter. What a ratter. What a ratter. What a ratter. What a ratter.

What a ratter. What a ratter. What a ratter. What a ratter. What a ratter. What a ratter. What a ratter. What a ratter. What a ratter. What a ratter. What a ratter. What a ratter. What a ratter. The roots were never the same. But... But...

But... But... Here's the thing, because I have... This has become a thing... It's not an argument I have with my wife. Sure. But it's certainly I think there's a way of stacking the dishwasher And there's a way of leaving the dishwasher.

You're fucking it up. But I... I don't stick to any of these rules. All I say is, don't put a thing in where it's gonna, when you open the dishwasher, be full of dishwasher liquid. That's it, that's very reasonable. That's pretty reasonable. So don't pop it in where it's gonna, you know, it's gonna turn over and fill up

and you have to chuck it away and probably wash it. Don't pop it in when it's gonna turn over is also your rule ruling the bedroom. LAUGHTER I'll pop it in first, then we'll try and turn it in. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, that makes sense. But I think here, this seems like some quite... There's some excessive shit going on here.

It's quite sort of strict rules he's got here. See, I have a very strong reaction to this and I don't mean to immediately solve the problem and ergo have no podcast but here's the only answer. Let's talk about it. The person who stacks the dishwasher can stack it in whatever fucking way they want. So long as they are the person who then put away everything in the dishwasher. Yeah. It's a really strong case. Because then he can stack it, he can have everything in their little place, and then when he can open it, he knows, ah, all the spoons are together, all the forks are together.

The segregation Tony has always dreamed of in all areas of society, whereas his family who presumably love him despite his horrible personality, they can just chuck everything into the dishwasher. And then when they open the dishwasher, they have to deal with the half-hazard mess of putting it in cover. As long as it goes in the cupboards in an orderly manner. Oh, okay, so that could have a roll-on problem. Yes. I see why actually there's more to this podcast than just one answer. Oh, thanks, you know.

But we're only halfway through the message. Let's carry on with this. Tony continues. Now he's used caps here. Oh. To my surprise, I'm not unreasonable. Oh no. I tell you what, make tell your keyboard.

I'm very calm guy. He says, I'm not unreasonable all in caps. So those designated sections could be different each time. Let's make it fun. Depending on the stocker, EG forks, then knives, spoons, then forks, and so on, it's not rocket surgery for fuck's sake. Right, I mean, I think there's a bit of a problem understanding rocket science and brain surgery there.

I like it's not rocket surgery as an expression. Yes. It's so free-tony as it. He likes things in order. That's a very good point. It doesn't fit with his brand. It's an interesting one, isn't it? Because I've heard that some people, when they put the forks

and knives away in the cutlery thing, and we've got a little standing cutlery section in the dishwasher. A little cutlery basket, if you were. How much money is mad making? And then a little interim section next to that. I'm not hurting. Yeah, and a third thing.

But we've got this little section, little basket. And I basically just put cutlery in any order. Now some people like to put them in all the spoons together so that when you unpack them into the cutlery in any order. Now some people, some people like to put them in all the spoons together so that when you unpack them into the cutlery drawer, you can just grab all the spoons, put them in, all the forks. But I mean, you know, I appreciate in a busy day you're probably saving yourself a little bit of time,

but I think in a basket situation though, it's hard to take out a clump anyway. It's a very good point. You make a very... I kind of have to take them out one by one. It's a very good point. You make a very... Point of have to take him out one by one. It's a very... You can't grab him and he's ho. Oh, you can't.

Oh, that's very interesting. Oh, that's very interesting. Pirate can grab them and he's ho. Pirate can grab them and he's ho. Pirate can grab them and he's ho. Pirate can grab them and he's ho. Pirate can grab them and he's ho. Pirate can grab them and he's ho.

Pirate can grab them and he's ho. Pirate can grab them and he's ho. Pirate can grab them and he's ho. Pirate can grab them and he's ho. Pirate can grab them and he's ho. Pirate can grab them and he's ho. Pirate can grab them and he's ho. Pirate can grab them and he's ho. Pirate can grab them and he's ho. Pirate can grab them and he's ho. Pirate can grab them and he's ho. Pirate can grab them and he's ho. Pirate can grab them and he's ho. And I'm doing it again!

So... Although we did promise to turn me over so I wouldn't get pregnant. I believe that's how it works. Quick turnover. Few. You cannot get pregnant if you do it laser-disclyles. That's what this means. So adding to my frustration... Oh, he's got something to add to his frustration as well.

Adding to my frustration is the common sense picture. They all get when they open a completed run dishwasher. They can bloody see how efficiently I've stocked it and yet they don't pay any attention as they unload it. They just don't appreciate how they can scoop all of the forks in one sweep as Harry suggested here, or clatter adjacent cy plates into an easily transported single stack without any fiddling about the size, reorientation, et cetera.

And you took the word slatter there. Yeah, it's a very... And fiddling. And size reorientation, absolutely. And, well, programmer has taken a certain order for this. And don't get me started on the fucking mugs. I'm a reasonable man, but I've been subjected to unreasonable behavior. In the name of all that is good and right

and holy in the world, help me. Love Tony, husband to one, father of five. Five! Thank you, my state mate. End of Tether Dweller, and he says, PS, please say hello to my youngest Arthur. He's youngest Arthur. Come in the Arthur's as he's got him.

He likes his games, he's got all different spellings. Or as he's spellings of it. Please say hello to my youngest Arthur because he's about to formally enter the dishwasher rotor which will no doubt comply with your recommendations. OK, go to the next chapter. Whatever we say, that's good. Well, a lot of them take there, God's me, these are all. Whatever we say. Well, a lot of them take their, but first of all, hello, Arthur.

Hello, Arthur. I'm very welcome. How many of them? OK, who... How old's that you got a bead step onto the dishwasher rotor? I reckon. 42. Yeah, OK, yeah. Well, let's assume that he's still living with his his no, I meant four

to two. You're working down the backwards, which is how I did it with Tom. I'm going to say, I'm going to say, it's important to you like a 69 back to back. We'll show you later, Clarky. Show you later, baby. Show you the play, basically. What you do is when you are a platonic friend and you keep all of your clothes on and actually haven't seen each other in six months.

And suddenly you're pregnant. Yep. Don't tell my wife. So, so I'm going say eight years old probably that'll be the age you get into the into the rotor. Okay Do you reckon I mean we have no further info? Yeah, I think you're probably right. I'm quite I'm quite bad with ages I really understand. Would you say you? You guys got your strum in the past Come on down. You don't have to keep repeating your defence from that one more kiss.

I am bad with ages, yes. So I just don't understand. I think, yes, 7-7 I'm going for. Sure. You can just 7-year-old with knives and forks. Yeah, I would say nothing like knives, sharp knives, maybe. it's made me think. The sharp knife's not supposed to be in the dishwasher anyway. That's true. Point-tree.

I knew you'd like that. I knew you'd like that. I would love that. So, I think Broner's point, five minutes ago, was actually a very good one. It is a good point. It's the people who load the dishwasher, unload the dishwasher, then they're making their bed,

and they will learn through process of experience. The thing is, though, Tom, like with your family and the chores, the chores generally get broken up. And so the same person loading and unloading the dishwasher is, that's quite like a big one rotor for one person. It's very true, especially with the staff of five. That's it. I think that the dishwasher is metaphor.

Bear with me. Basically, there was a line in there, and there was many lines in there that made me worry a bit about Tony. Tony, you OK, honey? It's what I want to say to Tony. But Tony did say at one point, they just don't appreciate. And then he went on to say, how you can pick up the forks.

La, la, la, blah, blah, blah, blah blah blah. You could take that sentence, guys. You could erase everything after the word appreciate and you could just put in the word me. Me. Yeah, you knew where I was going with that because we all said me at the same time. I was great. You say just don't appreciate me. Now I come from a family of five kids.

Oh, dear. Yeah, he says seven. It's busy and there was a lot of politics about who wiped the table, who watched the dishes, who dried the dishes, and who emptied the shit book. Yes. You know, it's like... The rigged, rigged. The rigged.

Who raised, therefore, younger siblings. There was a lot of politics going on. But I know that that's a busy household. Yes. And I feel that Tony is using the dishwasher and using us as a way to get through to his kids that actually what he wants is just a bit more love and appreciation in his life.

That's a very good point. And I think in a very chaotic household, you can't be striving for that much order. Yeah. You've got to know you've created this mess. Yeah, if you wanted a tidy dishwasher, Tony, have one kid. Yeah, tie a wanted a tidy dishwasher, Tony, have one kit. Yeah, tie a

nine-it-tone. You know what I mean? You want a tidy dishwasher? And you come. And I am not in your wife's vagina? Yeah. That's what I assume Tom was going for there. I understand Janutl's. Because I think as well, if you've got like, is he also the sort of person who has sort of one set of all matching crockery from, you know, you know, the way we accrue crockery is a very higgledy, pickledy way in the first place. Just let it be higgledy, pick... That's exactly what you'd get. That's how you'd get through fight glasses. Late at night, you think, oh, this is quite nice.

This is good. Let's just go in the jacket. Or you just go, oh, I don't have enough time to finish this. Let's go in the jacket. And that, finally, is Ben's model in the bedroom. Don't have enough time to finish this. That's good in the jacket. And that, finally, is Ben's motto in the bedroom. Town of enough time to finish this. It's going in the jacket. I did a jacket. Finish it on the way home.

Sorry. That's why you're liberating the town. I can tell you that. Do you think Tony is one of those person peoples? One of those person people's. I heard of that. He's a person people. My English is so good.

And so baby started draining my brain. Do you think he's one of those person people's who has like days of the week socks? And on a Monday, he wears his Monday socks and on a Tuesday, you see where I'm going with this? Yeah, does he have that level of order? Because I think, you know what I think it is. Tell us.

It's slowly, I think you'll be both absolutely right. Slowly and slowly, he's realized that there's less and less control in his life until he's gone. Well, look, this like two meter squared or whatever, you know, like, you know, this is a big dish. And he's got five kids, but that is a big old dishwasher. There's two my-long dishwasher. He's one of the five kids in there. He's one of the people that walk in dishwasher. It's a wet room.

I mean, that's pretty cool. If you could just, everything you need to wash, you clothes, you, the dishes. Just one room. You're just strolling. Do you know what that is? I think we are 10 to 5 years away from that technology. Yes. You still using a system to 5 years?

You talk about 15 years right now. LAUGHTER So, I think he wants, I think he's a man who has lost control as you don't have a house of when other people come in. And he is desperate for the one bit of control. But what the mistake he's made is, he's brought everyone else in and gone, control it like I wanted controlled.

Tony, be Mr. Diswisher in the house. Be the guy who stacks it, be the guy who unstacks it. You know what? Just do it. I've heard this a few times I've been around people's houses where they've been like, oh, dad, you know, the dad does the dishwasher. It's like a very, it's annoying if I have to. Yeah, but it's like, you know, it puts, yeah, I'll just stack your plates on the side.

Dad has a specific way he wants to have the dishwasher stacked. Okay. Maybe that's just what you want. You went with Arthur. That's really... Oh, that's my dad, by the way. That's a judge on saying that. So do you, I think... I think we're on our way to say and be closed.

I think we're almost on be closed. Just want to say that Tony has written us a really, really, really quite long letter about the dishwasher. I mean, 18 pages front and back. And the bell. I know. I'm sorry. I'm not even quite as well as a centess,

a one cent in email saying, it's not about the dishwasher, you know. And it's 77% as well. And my just won't have sent us a one sentence email saying, it's not about the dishwasher, you know. I think Tony just needs control elsewhere to let go in other areas. And then just a little bit more connection and therapy. Well, we were almost bad to say. That was my first shut-close briefcase. But it's sprung wide open on us.

The dishwasher doors flew open there, and the cycle was still in place. So... Look, it's just because I solved it five minutes in with my whole, you stack it, you empty-ish. There we go, let's go downstairs. No therapy needed. Beef clothes.

Again, beef soft. You're from a sauna, I get beef soft. Do you want to see what the world is really like? Yes. Four things is deliciously funny and spectacularly entertaining. A woman planting her course to free to act in love for. It's non-stop bonkers brilliance. I love that. Four things. It's non-stop bonkers brilliance. I love that.

Poor things. It's like theaters, December 15th. A cast powers the world's best podcast. Here's a show that we recommend. Hi, I'm David Boris, Canadian historian and host of Curious Canadian History, a bi-weekly deep dive into the wild, worrisome, and wonderful world curious Canadian history, a bi-weekly deep dive into the wild, worrisome, and wonderful world of Canadian history.

This season we've covered not season Alberta, the Palestinian partition, and even the assassination of Abraham Lincoln. We also have eight seasons worth of back episodes all right there for your listening pleasure. Check out new episodes of curious Canadian history every other Tuesday, wherever you get your podcast. Hey, Cast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcast everywhere, acast.com. I've got one here called Drink's Beef.

Oh. I'm kind of beef bovral. I would like your help in solving a beef which my housemate and I have had for several years now. It's a long beef. Yes, exactly. It goes back. And people.

And people. We enjoy sitting on the sofa and watching TV. In our years of watching TV and sitting on the sofa, my housemate has never once offered to go to the kitchen to get me a drink. This is not the beef. Okay. It is, mate. Yeah.

Fuck it is. We could, we could title this episode. It's not about the beef. Not about the, not, not, not, yeah. So, as you get, this is not the beef. She's not a very considerate person. But I knew this before she came, before she became my housemate, and it's honestly fine Honestly, okay, who's this person here? Did this person use honestly fine?

And did they put that in cap locks? Like a like a old Tony. This is this is Andy Andy. Okay, Andy. I front name Andy Name Andy. Okay. The beef rears its head whenever I offer to leave the side for to get her a drink. When I make this offer, I'm thinking getting her juice or a soft drink from the fridge, or maybe water. But in any case, a drink... Oh, but in any case, a drink which is quick and easy to get, but she always asks me...

Look up at tea. We're shaking our heads all the way. Yeah she always asks me, look up a tea. We're shaking our heads all the way. Yeah, we're all shaking our heads at this. Andy, you're an idiot. And I just look shocker already, mate. You're offering someone a drink, but you don't want to make them a hot drink. Then say does anyone want a cold drink?

Because also as well, tea and coffee is quick to make in the most part. Unless you're, unless you're, unless you're a pro. Bruin up, a slow brew whenever, you know, you've got that. A pour over. A pour over, that's the thing you've got, which is brilliant.

But most people. Can I have a cold brew nitro, please? Yeah, I mean, no one's asking for that. They're asking for, you know, like an instant coffee or a tea bag tea. Yeah, it's quick and easy. It's quick and easy. I mean, is she, have we gotten to her drink. Yeah, it's quick and easy.

I mean, is she? Have we gotten to her drink? Well, it's already a six-a-feet. Well, it's already a six-a-feet. Can I have a mehito? Yeah. Exactly. Which is what I mostly say from the cash.

Yes. You've got to stop that now, you're pregnant. I know. OK, it's got worse since you got pregnant. I know, but the baby loves rum. I haven't a clip so baby. Yes. But she will always ask me for a cup of tea, a drink which takes longer to prepare and

therefore keeps me away from the TV for longer than I want to be. When I refuse to get a tea, she says that tea is a drink and as I offer to get her a drink, I should get a tea. Oh, that's the difference. The drink. The defeating this every time. Yeah, wow. I say that my offer implicitly only includes cold drinks because when you offer, because when someone offers to make tea,

they would say, would you like cup of tea? No. No, would you like a drink? Mate. Oh, no. No, that's not true. No. If we, right, so when Brona, when you showed up today, yeah, it was a great moment for everybody. Would you like a drink? Mate. No. No, that's not true. No.

If we, right, so when Brona, when you showed up today, it was a great moment for everybody. It was a great moment. I think we all enjoyed ourselves. What was the finish the ticket take parade? I'm put our clothes back on. Put down the band. If we'd said, would you like a drink and you'd said, I'd love a black coffee with it. We wouldn't have gone fuck off.

We met a dark oak. You know, like, why would it, what, let's look at the evidence. And it fits. Is tea a drink? Yes. Yes. Yes.

Yes. Can't you ask for a cup of tea? Yes. This case is slamming closed. I would even say that if we go around someone's house and offer them a drink, you're more likely to mean tea or coffee than any other drink. If you go around someone's house, would you like a cup of drink? Would you like a cup of drink?

That's a leading question. God, I love a cup of drink right now. Why didn't you offer me a cup of drink? I'm afraid I'd be afraid for a cup of drink. I could have a cup of cup of drinks. You're going to a club today, so you offered you a cup of drink. Just for a cup of drink. I could have a couple of cup of drinks. You got a clock, guys. You offered you a cup of soup. It's a really big drink.

It's a little reference. I think, like many problems in order to solve the end of this, we need to go back to the beginning to when he told us something was not the problem. Exactly. It's exactly the problem. And Andy, is it Andy? It is, Andy. Andy said that his flatmate never offers to make him a drink. Now, there's two problems there.

First, yeah, she signs bit selfish. Maybe she needs to sort that out, but you can't fix other people's issues. This is what I've learned in my 24 years of being alive. That's a shame, because that's what this podcast attempts at. It's quite hard hearing that from you now, because that's kind of the gist of this. Fair with, fair with, fair with, that's the first. That's the first person, this is how we find out. That is why I came here to shut down this vanity project.

Guys, if you want to spend time together talk about your feelings, just do it. You don't need to put microphones in front of you. No, but Tony can't close his back door, please. But I was heading for a very serious emotional point. What did I do? And then I can totally remember, despite Tom interrupting us with his jaunty jokes, which is that he also has the ability to form words, our friend Andy.

So what he could say to her is, may I have a drink tonight, or would you mind making the drinks tonight? Tonight's the night's flat. Yeah, you have a drink tonight is a weird question. May I have a cup of drink tonight? I have a cup of drink tonight. Me, cup of drink now, woman! Look what I'm saying is, is that there's a breakdown of communication in this flat.

And that would be the first thing that I would worry about, not the amount of time it takes to make a cup of tea. Here's how I make a cup of tea, when me and my partner are watching television. Stand by for the rest, please, no? Stand up, walk to kitchen, put on kettle, walk back to sitting room, so that I continue to watch the television while the kettle is boiling kettle boils walk back to kitchen put T-bag in cup pour water in walk back to sitting room. It looks so easy My recipe is so good

Walk back watch bit more of TV walk back to kitchen put milk in take T-bag guys enter sitting room with T-bag milk in, take tea bag guys, enter sitting room with tea cup of tea form. Now here's the thing, not only are you not missing the television, not only are you not missing the TV, you're also getting steps on your Fitbush, clocked up a favor for that person so that later on when you say, can I have a cup of drink? They remember that you admitted, this is a feel-proof recipe guys, why y'all looking so dubious? I'd buy this cookbook. I use I would buy this cookbook This book of cook

Well, it's available in eight to four months time We are good at talking I finished the We are good, abtogging. I've finished the beef. No, no, no, no. Let's hear the end of the beef and then we will close it. I thought what I was thinking is, you know when you're in a hotel they have like everything you need for a dinner. How much money is there to make it?

So what's got the middle sink? They have like everything for your cup of drink on a tray. That wouldn't tray, yeah sure. Something with some biscuits on the side. You could just do that. You could have a tray ready for when you're doing your viewing pleasure. All they do often do.

Yeah, you're saying preparation is key. Bring it in and then you can make your cups of tea right there in front of the tea bag. A kettle for the living room. A little miniature kettle for the living room. Oh, and... Or just one that you transport on the tray. The kettle's on the tray.

A tea tray. A tea trolley look on a train. No, tea trolley, I like. You need a plug when you get to the other end. But that's kind of how they are in a hotel room. They've got the kettle. Not everyone spends as much time in hotels as you. You're going in the kettle in the kitchen.

You've just had a argument. You have to go in, you have to go in, sign into a hotel. You're signing into the show. You're signing into the show. Sir, could you sign into the IBS, please? Okay. Are we read through to you?

Right. Okay, Tom's patients with a just like, I just went to the window. I back you, I normally back you. Right. Okay, Tom's patients, with their just like, I just went to the window. I back you, I normally back you all the time on these sort of things, but put in the catalog of tray as magnets. Yeah, I can't get me in the catalog of tray. And I just think you should move on.

We've all pushed through it. But obviously. I just thought, if I can do this. I don't know if I can do this. If I said to Charlie, I'm going to make your cup of tea. And I came back and had a catalog of tray. And all the other, I keep you on. She divorced me and rightly so. And she'd be right. I know all the other people, I can't even say what she divorced me and right and so.

And she'd be right. I spent a lot of time in her house after that. I'll tell you that. Great! Can you sign in, please, sir? Oh, I didn't know where to begin. Can I love it very much? I can't love the tray.

I'm so excited. I was just excited. I did not know that the first time I did the podcast would be the breakdown of your love and term friendship and working relationship. Oh, it happens every day. And yet it's unfolding right before my eyes. Oh. Pick up from the sentence, put the kettle on the tray.

You put the kettle on the tray, you drink the tea. Listen, apologies to your listeners. I'm trying not to courtfully insist. I apologise to your brothers, unborn baby, who knows what's wrong. Oh, that baby is drunk. Yeah. She wants a cup of rum on my right.

OK, so I... She says... OK. She says that if I'm offering her a cold... If I'm offering to get her a cold drink and not a hot one, I should make that clear by saying, would you like a cold drink? Weird stuff, is this 15 minutes? Yeah, yeah.

I say that it's all-ringed. It's clear what they're going to read. It's clear what they're going to read. I'm not going to get a tea while I've offered to get her one. Even though here it comes, guys, she is my wife. Oh! Oh! Dun, dun, dun.

I didn't know this. I should mention that my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, my house, She is my wife. Oh! Dun dun dun! I should mention that my housemate and I am married. Okay. Alright, we got him, eh? You have to explain it. It's not a very good one, alright? I didn't know that we were getting a six-cent twist at the end of this piece. I need to...

It's more stentish, right? It's why she never offers. And it's why she always wants a hot drink to warm up her cold moments. I think, yeah, I think this is brief brothers. Help us end this beef before it's too late. My great fear is that Adolta will grow up, oh my goodness, and they've all evolved. That Ad That adult will grow up listening to her mother and I thinking that I'm always offering to make her

cups of tea when I'm not. Oh wow. We're so happy. We're so happy. We're so happy. Right. First thing, first thing's first. I do like saying things twice.

To be very serious for a minute, if you have got a young child in the house, please don't put a kettle on the table. LAUGHTER Please. That is the big point in you. That is crucial. Crucial. And do not feed that baby a cup of drink. That baby needs milk and solids from, I don't know, I want to say six months. Yeah, six months. It's waiting, yes. Okay, great. But do not pause boiling water directly into your baby. No, no, no, no, no. No, put it through a tea cup for us.

Straight in, straight in. No, that piece of information that he was holding out on does change things because marriages should be 50-50 overall, but they don't have to be 50-50 in every moment. So maybe one person does more of the driving, maybe one person does more of the hot drink making, but then the other person does more of something else. So we are missing a lot of context about what his wife does more of. And I would imagine it's everything else in the household and relationship other than making tea.

Yeah, giving birth to the baby? Yeah, tick. I imagine that's the thing. Oh, I hear that really easy. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. You'll love it. It's a real treat.

Oh, brilliant. So, lovely way to spend it, I think. Do you guys want to do a live podcast, you're here? Sure. We'll come in with a cat on a tray. Oh, you said, you're literally a child. Because brothers, brothers giving birth and call them in wife apparently. Actually, I forgot what I offered you, the podcast rights they already have the TV rights.

They've snuck it up, they've snuck it up. But the novel rights are still up for grabs. So, so yeah, so basically I think if you are getting each other on small semantic points like, well, tea is a drink, yes but I didn't say a hot drink then I think there's bigger things going on. Yeah, just accept. Make your wife a cup of tea. Except now, Andy, if you say you want to drink, it could include hot drinks and make your wife a cup of tea. I think that's absolutely right.

I think there also is a tonal question though, because what if Andy and his wife are just a pair of messers? And what if he's saying, do you want a drink? And she says tea and he says, oh, I didn't say a hot drink. And she's like, well, you said a drink. And then they do it in that voice. That's very different to, I'm not, I didn't say a hot drink. Well, I want a hot drink.

Do you know what I mean? That tone is very different. And we can't get that in print. So actually, what we need is Andy to send us a hot drink. Do you know what I mean? That tone is very different. Sure. And we can't get that in print. So actually what we need is Andy to send us a voice mail. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the room. Andy. And it's Andy. It's Andy Andy's here.

Andy, put the trigger. No, no, no, the cancel. Andy, what did you like a drink? So it definitely is beef solve, I think. Right, it's beef closed. Andy, would you like a drink? So it definitely is beef solve, I think. That is beef closed. Absolutely. That is absolutely beef solves,

make a hot drink mate. And in fact, why are you there? Make us one as well. From the starting of your beef! Yes, I have. So, Barona, have you brought a beef to share with us so we can try and solve your problems with your current house mate?

And thank you so much, it is the main reason why I came. And the huge fee of course. Yes and to tell which one of you is the father of my child. A role please. A baby. Yeah or Mama Mia which was more recent. Absolutely yeah but very quickly.

We only see it in both of those things. Very quickly if it is three men and a baby. I'm thinking Crosby Selic. Oh I think you do it. Yeah, really? It's a good one. Clarke. Um, good one. Dancer.

Oh, it's got to always say Clarke is Dancer. Yeah, Clarke is Dancer. Inside of that. I actually think Crosby is Gutenberg now. I'll take Gutenberg if you take, if you take Selic. I can't actually remember the third man in that film. Why come Berg? Yeah. No. Oh my god. Matthew is good in Berg. I think that Berg you be Celle. How's that? Okay. I don't know if that's. Yeah. Yeah. I think the only one I'm really happy with is Clarky being dancing. Really strongly feel that you're good at learning.

I didn't hear that, sorry. Shit, sorry. It's a, that's a, Rona. And now do we cast you as the three men in Mama Mia? No, we don't have time, guys. Clark is prox. I got the second voice

inside I'm prox. No. Okay, let's just cut it short. Matty Crosby as the father. I have a serious problem. It's almost too serious for a comedy podcast. A little bit of judging that. And so basically, you know, I've got a long-term partner, very fond of her. We're together 10 years, as I say, living together 8. Congratulations.

Thank you so much. Lovely person. Yeah. Lots of great attributes. Major problem in the bedroom. Where we keep our clothes. Hey, you're a goodist for that, because we are. And all the things we're not qualified to do.

Well, you're not. The other two are pretty qualified in the bedroom. So we have like, you know, wardrobes, chastro drawers. Yeah, I make a bit of money. And so, and Sue is the name of the defendant. So she... The more tribe for me. Yeah.

She's the name of the wardrobe, and also my wife. So she'll take her so she'll take her clothes out of the drawer and then she'll shut the drawer. But she'll shut the drawer like 70% right so that little bits of clothes are still hanging over the top of the top of the drawer. Okay so and then she'll, so and then she'll kind of open her wardrobe, pull something out. Another bit of something else will come out in a little bit, and she'll shut the wardrobe. So the wardrobe is also shut, you know, 70%.

So basically, like, I love her, and I'm in love with her. But she can't shut a drawer. And it doesn't matter how many passive aggressive times, I say, babe, someday you'll learn how to shoot a drawer, property at my rice. It's good, it's good. She still doesn't. And okay, so here's the problem.

Like imagine an otherwise tidy bedroom, you know, photos of our wedding, photos of you three guys. Sure, of course today, yeah. Dildo's a Kimbo. No. The name of our band. This is my wedding band.

That's my wedding band. That's my wedding band. Otherwise, Heidi, except that you just look over at the drawers and they're a little bit open with like, you know, indiscriminate bits of clothes hanging out. It's so annoying and I might need to leave her unless today. Unless we can solve it. Can I ask a question?

No, I'm sorry, that is... Do you know what? Good call. No, please, Matthew. Have you... Do you close the drawers after her for her? Have you started doing this? Yeah.

And is that... No, I don't know. Yeah. Is that... Is she spotting this? Is she clocking this? So I think no, I think the truth is neither of us like that because then, you know, she feels shagrid. Yeah. And then I feel like, um, Yeah. And then I feel tired, just exhausted from closing drawers all the live long day.

Shagged out. And shagged out. Harry was right. Harry was round. So, so yeah. Well, unfortunately, we can't, we can't solve this. Why the fuck did I come here? Well, because we have a man who can.

Mr. Fanchor Stanton. Oh, I thought it was Ted Danson. No, I thought I could go to Danson can Mr. Fanchor stand in oh, I thought it's Ted Danson. No, I'll think I'll dance Mr. Fanchor stand in I'll go and get him no Tom's Tom's character from a deep South John Grishamistar novel Tom's friend. Yes, Tom's Tom's good friend. Here we come. It's in the window Surprise the window. Oh surprise. He is a tall man. A long way down. Ladies and gentlemen, off to podcasts. A pleasure to be here today. Browler, listening to your travails and doors closing, drawers opening. Got me kind of thinking, where I'm from,

I live in a small town, simple folk, tragic people. Oh, for lifestyle, stop eating, have a walk, problems. Anyway, we got to talking about the good old days now. Back there, you probably remember a man who lived upon the hill Tied if fella went by the name of rabbit. I do remember rabbit Remember rabbit hold himself a sheep farm Usually came for a man who owns a sheep farm a rabbit day Rabbit would go out with his flock a sheep his flock geese. He had many flocks two flocks

two flocks Anyway, loyal sheep dog walking around keeping all the day Him and the men him and the men come back come back, come back, oh, bye. Geese, smile at our bag, geese. These are the things he had said. Anyway, one day, sheep dog gets all damn geese inside the pen. What? Sheeper in there too, getting along.

Oh, mate's his friends. Sheepdog closes the door. Tanninette's sheepdog. Privacy. Respects their privacy. Rabbit things to himself. Great good, good. He's a great good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good dig a hole he digs himself a hole turns around there's only one sheep from his flocks the dog is fucked the geese and the sheep ain't around and rabbit in a hole.

What I'm trying to tell you is this, some dogs aren't meant to be closed. Some holes they mean to be dug. That makes total sense. Anyway, I got a goal now. I had so many follow-up questions and he just jumped out the windows. He's not greatly followed questions. Who is that guy? He's single. I am around.

He's, yes, we never know. We've never pinned him down on that. I mean, he's got a wife, but it... I pin him down. I'm not going to jump out of a window so quick Well, bro, thank you so much for being our guest. I hope that solved your problems So that was the answer to my marriage was this Great great great thank you so much. I hope you go to fight that to you. I'm a terrible time

It's been awful having you Thank you so much. I love you. Oh God. I said it. Come out. I mean, love with all of you. Oh God, I keep saying it. Bye. I'm sorry, I can't be. Well, well, well.

What a treat. What a meeting. It'll take some beating. What do I keep rhyming things? I don't know. No, I won't be either. Anyway, if you enjoyed the episode, leave a review on iTunes,

or recommend us to a friend, or hop on Patreon, and check some money our way, we can't do this without your support. We'd also like you to come along and see us live. Our next live show is, where is it, Sir Ben? Wow. It's at the Phoenix in Cavendish Square. It's a great pub.

Great venue. When is it, Sir? I was dreading you coming to me with, when is it? Because I knew where it was, but I don't know when it is. Who are the guests on? They are, Jeff Lloyd and Sarah Bannon, a real life married couple. Sarah Baron, yes, close enough.

And, yes. And Sarah Baron and Jeff Lloyd, and it is on November the 20th. Remember, remember. November the 20th, podcasts and people and fun. And you can get the tickets from ticketex.co.uk or you can go to our Twitter where we have a link up as our pinned tweet currently. I think that will stay that way for a bit. We'd love you to be there.

All that remains to say is we apologise to the two people who sent in beefs, but if you would like to be roasted as Andy and Tony were, beefbrotherspodcast.com. We'd love to hear from you. We would. And we will speak to you very, very soon. Yes, this episode was produced and directed and worked on and polished by the one and only Emma Corsham. Corsham team. She also made some carrot cake that we've been eating for a while. That is very moist, very moist, very moist, positively so keen. Stay tuned for the Patreon neighborhood watch roll call. Very moist. Positively so keen. Stay tuned for the Patreon Neighborhood Watch Roll Call.

Cheers everyone. Bye. Please be upstanding for the Patreon Neighborhood Watch Roll Call. You'll find him under a great big banner. It's Steve Tamer. I've seen him coming through the door and through the gate. Through the door gates. It's great, I'm no gate.

You will find him under a great big banner that says welcome to Cornwall. It's Isaac Cornwall. I've seen him coming through the door and the gate and standing underneath a great big banner. It's Matt Smith. He painted his own name onto a massive banner. It's David Toine. The banner reads, What's your head as you go through the door

and don't trip on the gate? Please have a look. And stood proudly under that banner, legs a Kimbo. Oh, why'd smile? Cocking their fist to the sky. It's a nook! I saw them. I was stood in the doorway. Oh, good.

I could see the gate through the gate they came. Above their head, a giant banner that said, you're incredibly dear to me. Andrew Filery, I saw him there. In the doorway, next to the gate, under a banner of all things, I saw it, so vivid, it was David. I ran into the gate, I fucked the door, the banner was upside down. What? I don't know who to blame for this, I'll text my friend, Alistair Brown. I came into the room.

I said, look at this door. Somebody's fucked it. Fuck. I could barely hide my annoyance. So I had to go and speak to Ben Royalence and sort out. Here, commendeth, and here, commendeth, and here, andeth, the neighborhood charity watch. Patriotical! B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B-B- It's not for charity.