Pappy's Flatshare - House Meeting (Rafting on Stonehenge) S10E36

Episode Date: September 7, 2020

Matthew, Ben and Tom slide into your ear canal for a catch-up. This is a landmark episode, AND it's doubly magicalPappy’s - https://twitter.com/pappystweetSupport us on Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/pappysflatshareEdited by Emma Corsham Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Greetings, listener dear. We're back inside your ick ear canal where we once belonged and we belong again. Oh, it's a nice way of putting it, yeah. We once belonged there about a week ago and we belong there again today. Exactly right, I'm Tom. I'm Ben. I'm Matthew and welcome to an episode of Papi's Flat Share House Meeting.

How's meetin'? What temperature did I set the heating? and welcome to an episode of Papi's Flat Share House meeting. House meeting. What temperature did I set the heating? He knows the theme tune. You've listened. It's good, they do. You've listened to an episode. It's good. So before we get cracking, just very, very quickly,

if you missed the last two Papi's Flat Share slandowns that we have done, we did a really fun one with Deborah Francis White and Belaazafar, which was great. You can still watch that online. You can get your tickets to watch that on YouTube. And that is from eventbrite.co.uk, just search for Papi's Flat Share. And we also, we haven't done it yet, but when you hear this, we will have done it. We did one with Joe Wilkinson and Jess Foster Q

and again you can get tickets from the same place The Deborah and Balalon was great fun. I can only imagine that the Jess and Joe one's gonna be fantastic. It was Oh It was We're bending time right now and speaking of bending time, that's what we talk about on today's house meeting. Should we get started? Let's get cracking.

I've had a thought. I've got an issue. I've got a question I want to ask you. I want to talk. I want a chat. Okay, let's sit down and chew the fat. Has meeting. What temperature should we set the heat?

Has meeting. Why on earth am I always waiting? Has meeting. Who went my bed while I was sleeping? Has meeting. What's the point? Does life have a meeting? Has meeting.

Do you have a thing for landmarks? By a thing, what do you mean? Do I ever get a little tingle? Yeah, I mean, whenever I go past Stonehenge. They're fucking great, aren't they, landmarks? And when I was a young man, I kind of thought I'd collect them all, and I don't think I have, but then, and then there comes a certain old way of like, er, that's the tourist trap type thing,

but I've never had that. I'm still, I think I'm still hopped up on landmarks. I'm still hopped up on landmarks in the place I live. You know, like I still get excited driving into... The Lambo, to your flat. Yeah, yeah. So you say landmarks or lanyards? I still get excited driving into London, you know. I don't think I ever don't get excited to see in the House of Parliament, you know,

driving through the central town, seeing a towel bridge, it's exciting. Do you think we could do with a new landmark? Well, this is the thing, isn't it? You know, it's happening at the moment. Lots of the old statues are being torn down. People are talking about replacing them with things. Yeah.

You know, statues of landmarks, right? Aren't they? I mean, they can be. What do you say? Because you were saying you wanted to collect landmarks, right? Aren't they? I mean, they can be. What do you say? Because you were saying you wanted to collect landmarks. Because I would say, how small do you go in a landmark? You were talking about collecting the biggies, the top 20.

I'm going to go ahead and say, if they're a landmark, then they're a biggie. I don't think there's much chat about whether it's a landmark or not. And I think if you're trying to push me, if you're trying to push a statue as a landmark, I think you're probably going to have an uphill struggle. But what, for example, what about, what about, what about, what about, like, local landmarks? So for example, you know, like in, Wolverhampton, you know, the Civic Hall is a local landmark. Oh, I'm not sure. No, do you not say it was a local landmark? You could say that, but I don't think you

go like, let's talk landmarks. And it's on German. If we're in my bank drinking game, it's on German. It's on the Civic or in World of Apps. If we're sitting right in playing a drinking game, it's quite right. Landmots, go. First one to hesitate or DBA has to drink. And someone picks it up. Someone picks it up. Someone picks it up. You make a very strong point.

You make a very strong point. I can't argue with, I want to, but I can't argue with it. Then if somebody said, yeah, I mean, especially if they said it's their first thing, which is basically what I said. I said statues, generic, which I'd be just qualified for. Uh, statues one, yeah, statues would be, but you've got to get a specific statue. If you'd said Nelson's column fine, you've got to say statues, the concept. What about that?

And I'd argue, Civic or Wolverhampton? I'd argue with Nelson's column. You got to say statues the concept I'd argue with Nelson's column the column is doing the heavy lifting It's more about the column than the boy on the top in it. Yeah, but but Harry but come on If there wasn't a guy on the top and it was just a big column no one cares about the column a big column. No one cares about the column. The column anymore. Nelson's column is fucking mental when you think about it. It's a statue where the plinth has just got out of control. It's almost like a guy lost a bet. It's the spinal tap stone hench thing, isn't it? He confused feet and inches. Oh, we've got this great statue of Nelson's going to tomorrow. People can put his next to Nelson, they can put their arm around him.

It's going to be great. Everyone loves to see Nelson. Anyway, I've got the tattoos for this plin. Fuck it out. Somebody's not going to question that. No, no, no, no, it says it right here. It can imagine the arriving in the square I mean like, where is it? Look up the curtains over the top of it for the unveiling.

We're gonna need a bigger fucking curtain mate. They just have to get a real long bit of string for the quinter pool. Just a really long bit of twine she pulls it. I now declare this, I now declare this plinth open. It's such a bad plinth. It's the worst, it's the worst plinth. It's the worst plinth I would say. Oh, we've got the worst plinth in London.

We're gonna have to make a feature of it now. There's gotta be a reason, right? There's got to be some... Yeah, because it wasn't originally called Nelson's column. They had to, they had to retrospectively name it Nelson's column. We're, we're renaming the Nelson statue. Yeah, we have to make a feature of this because that's no, no one wanted that. It'll be like if they were like, okay, right, we're gonna, we're gonna put up, we're gonna

put up a statue of, we're gonna put up a statue of a non-contentious public figures. My brain went to Antendek, but I'm gonna put a statue of Antendek, right? They're non-contentious public figures. Sure, they've had their troubles in the past, but they're generally... That's only indeed as to them. And exactly, but we're gonna put it in the bottom of a sinkhole.

It almost seems like you don't like Anton Deck. It's like Nelson. Nelson's, they had to take true. Nelson's trash. It almost seems like Nelson's gonna sharpen go, was I not popular? Have I got bad breath? What's going on?

It was he a short man, Nelson. I don't know if he was short. I'm thinking of Napoleon. Napoleon was definitely... Would you think that's why they did it? Do you think because Napoleon was short and because Nelson beat the party? It was even bigger. That's really rubbing in.

Let's show that short, can't just those shorties. It's gonna be. I don't know. Yeah, but in the same time, it's a bit like, you know, if someone's wearing lifts, you don't suddenly think they're tall. I thought I was to go and stand on a really tall plinth. Pete wouldn't go, bloody hell, cross, be shot up. LAUGHTER

That gross, but he's been waiting for us suddenly kicked in hard. Bit late in the day, during his fifth decade. It's not fooling anyone up there. The overwhelming feeling is, how did he get up there? LAUGHTER It's like a David Blaine stunt, isn't it? It really is, yeah. I mean, there's not many other...

No, I can't think of other people who've gone about that. You know, like, not many other people have got a column. They're just settled for a normal plin. I know Katna Moran has in the Sunday Times. There we go. LAUGHTER She's very successful at that. That is officially a lovely bit of business. She's very successful at that.

That is officially a lovely bit of business. It's a great bit of business and I'm happy. I really enjoyed that. Happy to do it and Katlin, if you're listening, pop on the show. We'd love to have you on. We would love to have you on. We'll have a Hampton's finalist.

We could talk about the Civic Hall, all the landmarks. We'll do the landmark tour. You know what, actually, not a bad idea, right? New podcast idea. The two of you, I'll happily hold the mic. The two of you, I'm Catlin' Moran, wander around Wolverhampton and talk us through the many landmarks.

There's the man on the horse. There's the civic hall. There's the slave rooms. There's what are the other top landmarks that say? These are just places. These are just places. The more than you, yeah. You think these are just places? Yes.

Just wait a minute. You think these are places? No, I'm not saying these are places. These are the living history of Wolverhampton. Where did you not pal him, you know, he not paled Deliverus Rivers of Bloodspeech? Where was that? Where was this agenda of yours? I just wanna, I wanna put

your answer on the map. I just wanna, I just think, you know, no one's done the truly great Wolverhampton podcast. No one's done it yet. That no one's done, you're gonna be the guy. I'm gonna be the guy behind the guy, sure. I'm not going to. I can't say, you know, I like Wolverhampton. I've been there many times. I've stayed over a few times at Clarke's

parents' house. I forget the address. But yeah, I can't claim to be Wolverhampton's most favorite son. However, I reckon, you know, everyone loves Catlin' Moran, everyone loves the two of you. It's the perfect combination. It's gonna be the new My Dad wrote a porno. Hello? LAUGHTER LAUGHTER

You were absolutely... This is the worst bit I've ever been in! And I I'm pitching to my two best mates I can't believe it. That tight chat was essentially a plinth in the client you were just slowly turning on. Higher and higher. Me and Tom just going, man the fucking house crossed me off too. I'm off to Woolveau, I'm going to make podcasting history. Woolveau landmarks. If we were playing top trumps, what's the most impressive landmark you've got in your arsenal?

Oh, that's a great question. Can I do Woolveau haptons of it called? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, I know you're gonna say. I'm from Wolverhampton, okay? What? You got, you get some. What is the, what is the, what is the, if the opposite of getting the keys to the city,

they've locked me in a sort of chastity belt. I'm no longer allowed to enter the city. Okay, okay, sorry, sorry, Wolverhampton, I'll leave you alone. What have I done that's, oh, I tell you what's a good one, Sydney Opera House. Oh, yeah. I've been to Sydney Opera House. I think that's one of those iconic buildings here.

I'm going to see your Sydney Opera House. Yes, yes. I'm going to, I think, raise it a grand canyon. I run it because I'm lowering it. Absolutely. Love these statues. Love these statues. And deck down the bottom of that.

Right at the bottom of the canyon. There they are. What's the world's lowest canyon? What what's the world's lowest statue? The world's lowest statue getting touch. Please getting touch papi's flat share at gmail.com Please getting touch. What is the world's two donor well? Why not? Has a statue fallen down a well great question Okay, so we've got we've got To be there demonstrating how yes, I'm doing should be done for the

Yeah, nothing I'm nothing but supportive to you to absolutely I always approach this with a smile. I always say yeah great idea Clarky. Where are you now you now because we've had Sydney Opera House we've had the Grand Canyon. I'm not going to be able to compete really but I think probably the best I've got is the Statue of Liberty. You know what I think it does I think Statue of Liberty absolutely I think that is definitely up there. I think a long line. No I don't think it beats a canyon though. No, look, that's a, like clock is raised. That's actually there. Yeah, it is a statue, but it's a big fuck off statue, right?

Yeah, and it's also, it's also Liberty Island and everything. You know, it's got, it's a whole place as well, you know. It's also mind. Also, we're talking here about places that David Copperfield has done tricks in. Is that what makes a landmark? Because I was now going to go, I've been to Alcatraz. He's escaped from Alcatraz. He's made the statue of Liberty Disappear and he's flown over the Grand Canyon. You can tell what you're like about Copperfield but he knows how to juge up a landmark. Yeah. I see everything at the wall of Havton Civic Hall.

I don't think so. He has not, no, no, I could tell you now. And I think that's how you know, if, if, for example, he said he was gonna push over Stonehenge, you'd go, yeah, I could see that, I could see that happening. I could see him, I'm gonna push over Stonehenge and reassemble it. You could see that being one of his stunts. If he said that.

I had to come in with the man who said, I was driving past and I just thought, oh come on. Well it's because it takes so long to drive past, doesn't it? It takes a fucking age, it's always, it's always big traffic around Stonehenge. I just thought get out there and give it a good British go,

heave it over and be like, oh come on guys, move on. All right. It's a staining that we're still so impressed by stone hinge, because you kind of go, we've betted ourselves now, like we've built co-ops. Do you know what I mean? Like, like, that is, what that is. Is it really?

But we haven't moved on from co-ops either, have we? It's a rudimentary co-op and it's like, look, if I did that now, people would, if I was like, come and see my new house, people would be like, you're what mate, put some of those on it. Yeah, but if you've done it without any of the modern technology, we'd still be pretty impressed.

Yeah, but I've built a hand for you about Garden. I will say it's a very kind of, it seems like a very English big landmark where you're like mate, you've got the Puma to Geese. Exactly. And it's like a platter of, it's like when you're going someone's haze and you're like go look what my toddler did and you're like go oh that's good for a toddler because they've, they've scrolled the shape of a house on your fridge or like look it's a it's a duplopile and it's like that's the equivalent of Stonehenge it's like look we gave it a good go at a house 7000 years ago it's like yeah mate you know like Clarke's cracked it there can't be

many years between Stonehenge and you know the hanging gardens of Babylon, the pyramids, some shit in Machu Picchu, it's like Stonehenge. It's pretty basic, right? It feels like it was the start of something. Yeah, we're going to do that and they got off my throne. F**k it, this is not happening. Do you not find it kind of quite awe-inspiring to see it though? Do you not find it? What, they want to put two bricks on top of each other?

They're not bricks. They're like giants. They're like giants. They're giants. Giant stones. Slabs. They're big. It's enormous.

They're big bits of stones. I've never been in, the thing is, I've driven past it in loads of times. Sure, yeah. It's never impressed me and I've never felt compelled to stop the car, get out and walk up to it. Right. But how did they do it though? That's what I'm saying. It's pretty damning, isn't it?

How did they do it though? How did they make it? On stones. They just pecked at it, they were loading it in. They pecked at it. And right. We just have to be very low to lift in. With a hand. And right. And with a fuck's hand. But if you compare it, they go on doing it.

Just some big caveman looking mother fucker. Who they go, oh, he's gonna do this. It's ropes and pulling. Right, it's ropes and pulling. I listen, Perry, this feels like the sort of thing that you would... You know, it's like a rough building task on a stag do. You'd claim you knew what you were doing, and then you'd absolutely...

You'd come to pieces in the middle of the lake. Should be fair though, Tom got across the lake, didn't he? Yeah, and amazingly, he did it on a bit, a bit of stone. My stone raft is a landmark. What Tom did is he sat on the stone, and he got heft to skim him across the water. Talking by the way, talking of the toddler making something. Now my little daughter has just started nursery and she brought back her first college she'd ever made and so my wife was picking up from nursery and this is this is mad. She was young for a college right?

Young for a college yeah so she's just she's just over 13 months so she's little and so the teacher at nursery handed the college to my wife and said look look what Cleo's made and Charlie was going oh that's wonderful that's so brilliant. Oh Cleo you're so clever and the teacher sort of stepped away Well, I did most of it. You're like what? Of course you did you're the fucking teacher, but you don't need to tell us that And also what were you hoping that she would go look this look what Cleo's made and we would say to Cleo Of course, you did, you're the fucking teacher, but you don't need to tell us that. That's not true. And also, what were you hoping that she would go, look, look what Clio's made,

and we would say to Clio, listen, well done, Clio and all that, but oh my God, Renner, you're amazing. How did you do this? I did most of it, can believe it. Anyway, so you're not impressed by Stonehenge, is what you're trying to say. No, that don't.

It's not a song right. I'm impressed by Stonehenge. I'm not impressed by the blackpool tower. The blackpool tower? No, the blackpool tower, it's a poor man's tower, isn't it? A poor man's watch tower, just a Paulman's tower? It was Paulman's Iful Tower, we're all thinking it. Who's looking at Black Paul Tower and not thinking about Iful?

It's a good point actually. You know what I mean? You're like, it's Iful all day, isn't it? Yeah, but at the same time, it's still pretty impressive. It's still a pretty impressive feat of engineering, even if it's not the best version of that thing Like I will say this about the stone hinge. It's the best hinge going Like they're on

There aren't many other hinges. No, that's true. That's to compete is there. Yeah, you're talking to your list of your top 10 Hanges which I was looking at on Buzzfeed the other day. Oh, yeah. They don't compare. What about... What about... It's bullshit. Straw Henge. What makes a Henge? Dick Henge, and then finally...

Of course, the wolf got... So, he put paiter two of those. Yeah, what do you think about the other sort of low level British landmarks of that ilk? For example, the Sir and Abbas Giants. How do you feel about that? What is that the white stuff in the ground? The chalk man with his knob sticking up. Lovely. That's a good bit of business, yeah. There's something for everyone. There's a bit of Copper Feele's. There's a lot of mystery.

It's a lovely day out. Copper Feele's and mystery. That's what David Copperfield brought to it. So I wanted to talk about, right, Copperfield, the whole thing behind Copperfield is that he's probably twins, right? That's, I've heard that rumor that David Copperfield is twins, yeah.

So like, you know, like the prestige kind of storyline Copperfield's living that dream, right? Spoiler alert, yes. So, do you not think he could have made a bit more of that? Like, like, you know, thinking about, like, say like, if he, you know, he walks into the Wolverhampton Civic Hall and pops out the Wolfram, which if you know, if you know, Wolverhampton, it's like there's two entrances, the Civic Hall and the Wolfram Hall.

Perry, this to me is great stuff, but I feel like I can't help but feel it's a trap. I can't help but feel. I'm going to get all excited about this idea of David Copperfield in Wolverhampton and you're gonna say Crosby you fucking loser You could you could make red square disappear. I mean If if I'm copperfield and I'm twins. Yep You've got a rev you reveal it at some point as a as a big or is it better to never like? No, magician never reveals their tricks

because that would undo all of the brilliant, because there are things online trying to work out how he did his tricks like for example, making the Great Wall of China's appear or escaping from Alcatraz or sorry, he didn't make the Great Wall of China's be, he went through the Great Wall of China. He walked through the Great Wall of China.

But if he, yeah, exactly, he said, I just can't mark trust, twins. If he said, oh, by the way, what happened is I pretended to push through in that little silhouetted box, I pretended to push through, I just disappeared into a little fake box we had underneath. My brother was on the other side. He pretended to come through, he was dressed exactly like me. That would ruin it for people.

Okay. So is he building up too? Copperfield dies. he pretended to come through, he was dressed exactly like me. That would ruin it for people. Okay, so is he building up to Copperfield dies. His body sits in state, everyone walks past his corpse. They bury him. Yes. That is funeral. The priest says and rest in power, David, what a field and like takes off his hood and it's David

Copperfield, he gets off with Claudia Schiffer and rides off on a motorbike. Well that's the other question as well, you know, does just who knows? Because you've got to have a you've got to have an inner circle of people who know, okay? He's why Schiffer presumably knows. Is he still married to Claudia Schiffer? I don't know, I mean I've not really thought about That their arrangements since I know about it first time around Emma can you find out if Claudia Schiffer and David Copperfield are still are still together, please and But so you think he's gonna oh

Such a shame such a shame? Such a shame. Did she know? And let's be honest, mind in the gutter was there a three way. We're all thinking it. No, I wasn't thinking that at all. No, my goodness. Well, you don't have a three way with your brother. Do you?

No. My identity's called twin. I'll ask him. No. Okay, lovely. Lovely, lovely, beneficial business there. A sort of your podcast. A lovely, very physical business there from Paris.

How's BZ? What would you say to Bro? How's BZ? Probably nothing at all. there from Paris. It's hockey season and you can get anything you need delivered with Uber Eats. Well, almost, almost anything. So no, you can't get a nice drink on Uber Eats. But iced tea, ice cream, or just plain ol' ice?

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I love that. Four things. It's a like theaters, December 15th. There must have been some very, very strong NDAs and pre-nubs. Because also as well, at what stage in your dating relationship do you reveal that actually, professionally, I'm a twin. In my showbiz career, I am a twin. I mean, you can't, you know, you've got to trust that person so much. I absolutely love it. I really hope it's true.

Because it's fucking great great isn't it? The only thing is it doesn't explain lots of his other tricks. It doesn't explain making the statue of Liberty disappear. Twins. Twins. It does actually. Oh hang on. Yeah go on. Okay. I can't wait for this. You got David Copperfields doing for the statue of liberty in front of the camera And you got I'm gonna make the statue of liberty disappear Then you cut to his twin in front of a different camera that isn't pointing at the statue of liberty and he goes Look, there's no statue John I mean he's just in a different place Then you cut back to him that is kind of effectively what they actually did. Yeah, I think that's how they did the trick.

Emma, you're saying it's a spinning platform. But yeah, they rotated the audience, didn't they? So the audience couldn't see this actually of liberty. They sort of rotated them around without them realizing. Why is something they did with mirrors? Maybe they did. I mean, Clarky just gestured to the end of it. I thought he just went, it's mirrors.

Well that's why I instantly started thinking about it because he's like, what mirrors Ben? What do you mean? Yeah. What do you mean, Ben? What do you mean? Well, I mean mirrors. Ah, yeah.

Just out of me. Yeah. He gets it. Well, I mean mirrors. Ah, yeah. Just out of range. Yeah. He gets it. I was only visiting mirror hens just the other day, and I absolutely loved it. You know what? It really holds a mirror up to life. Under the hinges. Yeah, exactly.

Were you a copperfield fan as a kid? Did you like his big spectacles you used to put on Telly? I mean, like, I don't think... I think you're a spectacles mate. Yeah, you're a fan, mate. I don't think I remember them in that, like I remember thinking it was fucking cool what was going on.

I remember them flying around the place and going through hoops. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. And I mean, like think, obviously, like magic, magic's really cool until you reach a certain age, isn't it? And then it stops being cool and then it kind of gets cool again. Well, there's a certain age when you don't like the idea that someone's tricking you

and you don't want, you don't like the idea of not having knowledge. So you want to prove that, you know, everything. It's like the golden age where you believe the magic that your uncle can do. Do you know what I mean? That was real, that was real my mum, that she would always, she always like insist, she's always been like, magic isn't real. Tom's uncle's not as magic as he gets. He's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a, he's a So am I mad? A more or all magicians twins? Not mad, yeah. Do you think Paul Danger is a twins? Because, so also as well, that would mean that Paul Dangerles effectively could die twice.

The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was dying twice. I don't know. I don't know if one of your tricks are you dying? It's worth doing. But obviously he could say like you know say say the young you know the the sorry the the first brother to pass away the other brother the remaining brother can carry act on he just can't do any of the the big stunts that involve twins well Copperfield hasn't performed in a long time, so... Do you think one of the Copperfield twins got ill and died?

I hope not. Really hope. I mean, the Gotill bit made that really sad. I think the dying bits worse. No, no. It's one of the Copperfields. I'd happily get ill. No, if one of the copper fields dies, you don't want them to get ill and die. You want them to, you know, like the motorbike

went the wrong way or some shit. It's, you know what I mean? Also quite sad. Oh, yeah, sad, but not as sad as, you know, he just got ill and died. It's like he went off in a, like, he flew off the wrong way. He flew off the wrong way on the motorbike

he flew straight into the mirror do you think there's a really good story in putting the band back together kind of like like a David Copperfield what he wants to do one big trick but his brothers with brother got out the game but also his brother got out the game he got out a shape so when you see the brother he would be like living out in a cabin somewhere. He wouldn't look anything like, he'd have like a long, straggly grey beard. David Copperfield of course kept his vagus look, you know. Oh my god, the puppy shirt. Yeah, that's a little gorgeous.

The gorgeous, a slightly malady haircut. Fucking hell, this is a film, this is a really good film. The permitan. This is a really good film. I hope you're a boy. Unfortunately, you know, the brother who's living out in the woods The permitan. This is a really good film. You're poor. I'm poor. Unfortunately, you know, the brother who's living out in the woods has joined a militia and has got a full face tattoo.

How do you deal with that? How do you deal with a Confederate flag on the forehead? It's very 2020. It's very 2020. That's, I think there's a definite, there's a great Hollywood story line there. You know what I think is great there. And what will happen is he would then, he would get his old assistant. He'd have to go back and find his old assistant.

And the assistant would be like, that's great, but I'm after Asma's sister. Yeah, that sounds good to say. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's the great chord. And so the assistant is either, like, that's great, but I'm after I'm a sister. Yeah, that sounds good to say. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so the assistant is either, like, you know, again, could be, she could be tatted up, she could be prego. We can't repeat the face tattoo. She's the storyline of two people who've got face tattoos and they're trying to get back into a normal job.

All right, she's, all right, she's prego. How about that? How do you deal with the fact that one of your identical twins looks different to the other? She's pretty good. In that scenario, you put a fake belly on the other one, don't you? Oh, yeah. I was going to say that. And I'm afraid to say you afternoon and the face that it was. This is Ocean to Leven meets the prestige and it's about up.

It'd be Ocean to Leven and he realised what it was at the end is Ocean's one one. Yeah. It was Ocean to my dead. And it was all of them. It's mirrors. Yeah. It's all mirrors. That would be that slightly disappointing end

You just say The slightly disappointed game where they say I got as a gig at the Wolverhampton Civic Hall But I want to play the Wolfram we're playing both But I want to play the Wolfram. We're playing Boaks. Oh. Oh. Fucking hell. It's an homage to Copperfield. It's, there's a human story. It's funny. Yeah. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm script.

Right. We can't put this podcast out anymore. I'll listen to a deer. I might write it up. It's a good idea. So we have like verbal trademarking on this. I think so. I think if you, if you, you know, if we put this out, we're going to put this out in a couple of days time. Basically, if somebody else does it and we know that we're listening to the idea, we're suing. That's how that's how that's how that's how that's how that's the way it is. I'm sorry to, sorry to end the episode on a sort of legal disclaimer

here, but if you rip off our ideas, I'll tell you what though, here's the thing about this parry. We've talked about our ideas since 2011. Yeah, no one's taken one of them. That's very true. No one's, no one's chief to single one of our ideas. It's a real, real strange phenomenon. It is unusual to me, yes. So much gold is just gold. Okay, well, look, we're giving this the old ear canal patent, as it's known. Yes, absolutely. It doesn't leave the ear canal.

Yes. Speaking of which, do you reckon we could just do a podcast where we just pretend we're organically coming up with a plot for an existing new film and then and then try and get some money out of it. As in, like if we now pretend like we've we've we've we've we've come a lot with the Green Mile. Oh, okay, right, Tenet, okay, sure, sure. You pick a more recent film. Good, good, good, good, cool. Good, cool, get, no, absolutely right,

Clark, you get the Teenagers on board. We've got to do that. Yeah, so. Tenet's, tenetures. Get the tenet, tenetures on board, absolutely yes. We've, we've, we've, we've, we've, we've, we've, we've got to get those tenetures on board. And, get the tenetures on board.

And then be like, here, see? We, we'd come up with this idea. Yeah, well, yeah. That is really amazing. We've got to be saying we travel back in time. That is tenet. Tenet. Tenet that we came up with the idea for tenet. That's not a bad idea for a movie. A spin-off movie where somebody goes back in time, well, writes the idea for tenet, Patents It, Sue's Chris Nolan.

My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my, my where somebody goes back in time, well writes the idea for for tenet, patents it, soos Chris Nolan. My idea for a movie is someone who's obsessive back to the future. Yeah. Yeah, there we go. And knows it like the back of their hand, they love the Trinidad. They're watching it lightning strikes the house and they wake up they're in Sun Valley and they're stuck in back to the future and they know the only way they can get out of the film back to their house is using the energy of the lightning strike at the end of back to the future. Right. So it's kind of like back to the future for really and it's it's it takes place

in and around the action of back to the future one and back to future two. So at any stage, you're negotiating there's two Michael J. Foxes obviously. You you enlist the help of But if you're going back to 1955, doesn't dock stays in 1885, doesn't it? Yeah, but there's a dock in that time though. Yeah, that has to be else, you know? So it's basically back to the future four, but it takes place behind and around the script of Backstreet 1 and 2. So what, what, sorry, at the start, are they obsessed with the film?

No. Yeah, they're obsessed with the movie, so they're disinit into the movie. Oh, yeah, okay. It's 2020, so no. Yeah, yeah. I'm watching the film or my character. Yeah, you know, can the can the Delorean do two trips So it's basically there's gonna be a moral moral dilemmar as to you're gonna get there when doc and marty are trying to Try to connect the cables and all that kind of stuff and all the letter tearing up the letter and all that kind of stuff

You're gonna try and get into the Delorean before Marty gets in, push him out the way and type in 2020 into there. I don't think so, I think it's more about. You have to get your own. Because it's a slightly different portal, isn't it, you haven't gone back through time, you've gone into the world of a film. Yes, you need to get back out the world of the film.

So it's a slightly different direction but you need to get back out the world of the film. So it's slightly different direction, but you need to say, you need to hit your remote and say it's your time, kind of your thing is like your remote control. So you have to get the lighting to strike that remote. Or like there's like a black and white television that you've come out the other side of. But like you have to use your knowledge of the events of the film and you kind of cheat, you use CGI to kind of use existing footage and new kind of computer

magicry. But it's like it's an homage to. Um, so, uh, so what is to stop that character, though, just going to the clock tower and holding up there until the day? Well, all kinds of shit. They, they interrupt the action of the film. Right. You know, all the, all the confusions that you'd want in the film. Right. Because that, they'll level the bit so they'll be like, I want to go see that light. It's not going to hurt. It's not going to hurt just to see that one bit. I like you think about the popularity of like secret cinema and all that kind of stuff and it's basically like it taps straight into that. Yeah. It's a good idea.

It's a good idea isn't it? But it's like, yeah, I think it's a good idea. It's a good idea, isn't it? But it's like Yeah, I think it's good idea. Well, it's a bit like the tenant pitching idea, but I think there's more More fun Well, I was always with Nolan films. You didn't like tenant did you? Oh, Lordy Lordy. No, I mean don't get I'd say It's probably for another day. There's another podcast. Or people can just go and read your Twitter. Yeah, I'm just getting warmed up. It's all out there. It's all out there. Did you like, did you like,

what's the one before it? I mean, look, I think the slightly better way to say, I didn't enjoy 10 it is, I did not understand Tenet at all. And so I think like I can put it on me. I can go like I can go I have rarely seen something that I have understood less. No, you know, I kind of go is that because I thought the one I thought the one with it, maybe I'm too thick for a Tenet. I thought the one where he was pushing books through a bookshelf, I didn't really get to understand that either. I didn't know what that was. That was all about. Yeah. Which one's that one? I mean, the last one he did. Yeah. Bullshit. What was it called?

Bullshit. Interstellar. Interstellar, that's right. Yeah. Interstellar. It was, I had no idea. Yeah, I mean, look. we could go down a terrible rabbit hole I'm sure you saw laws yeah, but like I don't it's not you know I would I would just say I I you know if you pause that film at any moment and went what's happening now and what they trying to do here I'd be like I don't know and. And I really, I really, really don't know actually. Yeah. It's not like I don't know a bit, it's like, I just don't know. But was it sort of entertaining, like was it visually entertaining enough for you to kind of to hold you or you were just like, the confusion of what was going on just took you

out of it completely? Yeah, I'd say that. Yeah, I'd say that. But being obviously it looks nice, but then films do, don't they? And on that bombshell. Yeah, back back back to the future. Something like that. Back back back to the future. Back back back back to the future That's the only one to understand what's going on. They missed the trick with that didn't they that's That would have been nice if that's how they they're done instead of back to the future is back back back to the future And then back to future. It was back back back to the future No, I'm not sure about that actually Clark. I don't know. I'm sorry No. I'm not sure about that, actually, Clark.

I don't know. I'm sorry. I think calling it back to the future, too, is better. Rather than calling it back to the future. Well, I'll never know. We'll never know. We'll never know. We'll never know the answer to that.

But that's the reason we have these podcasts. It's to get to... Colonel's of truth. Exactly. One month's Grand Canyon is another month's Wolverhampton Civicle. True say. How's leading? How's leading? Goat impressions. Let's hear bleeding. How's leading?

Well, there you go. There it is. Strong work from your three friends. A profound ending, I thought. Yeah, yeah. And again, always nice to hear about henges, you know, we've talked about statues, we've talked about henges before. There's clearly something out there that we haven't quite loved. We love a plinth. We love a plinth. Love a plinth, a lot of plinth chat today, yeah. Always, and I'm sure deep fans of the show will want to go back and listen to the old episode of Bangas and Nash.

They'll want to go back, sure. They'll want to go back, back, of course they will. And deep fans of Mickey Flanagan want to go back, to listen to the episode of Bangas and Nash, where we talk about our visit to Justown Hinge. And yeah. Very mind it was recorded at a different time. It was a different time, exactly.

It was done in the UK. It was done in the UK. It was done in the UK. It was a different time. It was absolutely, it was, wasn't it? Yeah. There's some hinge in this hinge. Right.

So if you enjoy these shows, which I'm sure you do, because you've got to this point in an episode, then why not join our Patreon, patreon.com, forward slash, papi's flat share, as soon as you join, if you pledge $5 or above, you get over 100 episodes, there's bonus, bonus content, galore,

including a lot of content going on. There's including over 60 episodes of a flat share lockdown, which is our regular podcast we've been doing all the way through lockdown, which is, it's a real community. It's really worth joining. If you want to hear what the other listener deers are thinking, then this is the way to do it,

because people get in touch with us, and we've got a load of regular features that are very, very fun. And yeah, we'd love to have you on board. Oh yeah, get on board, come and join us. Also, feel free to leave a review on iTunes, feel free to recommend us to your friends, the old fashioned way using your mouth

or text message, that's weird by say things. Yeah. But I'll tell you what, I'm just gonna go around and see Clark in using the old fashioned way my mouth. I'm just gonna recommend a few things to him. Great. Yeah do so do so. Thanks for joining us. This episode was produced as ever by Emma Corsham. Corsham's team cheers everyone Cheers everyone! Cheers everyone! Bye! Can we please be upstanding for today's Patreon neighborhood waterfall? Ho! Duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, duh, D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D- Oh, dude. Oh, dude. Oh, dude. Oh, dude. Cowabunger, dude. Oh, dude.

The other day, man. Yes, man. I was eating the pizza, dude. I was hanging out in the sewer, and I was watching the greatest show, man. And I was watching it with my main man, Chris Bowman. Oh, dude. The cow was gone, dude. Oh, dude. Whoa, dude. man Chris Bowman I was in the I was in the suit the other day man

Yes, man, and I was watching the tibitty Man fire They're going all the way to Bethlehem And I turned over and I and I chaired a pizza with Mark Stephenson Did you rhyme Stevenson with Beth Bethlehem there? Don't think about it. Don't think about it. You know I was in the suit man. I was having a pizza. Well And silly I was like whoa what's that man? What can I sniff?

It's only my best pal Helen Smith Oh my god, you know man all the other day I've been there. Yeah, we've all been there I was down in the sewer man. I was eating a pizza and I was like oh my god Imagine if eating pizza was my job and you know what I realized that it is someone's job and that man is Jonathan Cobb I was down in the suit the other day and I took a really big shit Best place I said splinter I hate shipy I said splinter Whoa, do you like Alec bold I like Thomas

You know the other day, we were ordered pizza with a pal, and he was like, you know what, I want some stuffed crust. Shhh, I'm gonna order it. Do you think? Yeah! Sure, do you think?

I'm gonna order it. Do you? I want some stuff crotch shirts Oh my god, you know what the other day You know what the other day I was making a pizza out of plasticine man I was making a pizza out of plasticine because I wanted to hang a plasticine pizza on my wall, man You know what but I was I was kind of worried because it was because it was all floppy and I was worried that if I stuck it to the wall it would all fall apart.

So I said to splinter man, what do I do? And he said, well why don't you paint a load of varnish over it? And that'll act as a sort of hardener. And I said, that's a great tip man. Where'd you get it from? And he said, I got it from Kathy Gardner, man. Oh, well, here's our hatch out. Here's the other day and I was taking a shit man.

Oh, my splinter was there. And he was slacking off the work of Stephen Baldwin. No, hey, not bars. Well, I lay off Stephen, man, he's just trying. And I couldn't agree more when I got a text message from Negrin with Nick Brian man. No man, not when that text message came through. I thought I yes man Brian Peter with the main man Yes, Steve a bold win

Man, you know what me back draft baby What a great actor man. What a great brother to his brother By a dog with Paulie Shore Steve voted so much I wish I could marry. So, to get who'd you want to marry? Steve, Steve Bowden, I wish you could marry him, right? I get it, okay. So, I got my palliant to do the ceremony.

Grace Barry. Grace Barry. Grace Barry. What one and only. Great, Mary. What a good person. Whoa, you know what, the other day, man. Oh, yeah, bro. You know, the other day. Which day, man?

The other day, I went to Texas, man. And I was traveling through the sewer, and I popped up, and I came out of the toilet, out of the sewer, and I started wandering around, and I popped up and I came out of the toilet out of the sewer and I started wandering around and I saw all these pictures on the walls, the adj. W. Bush and I don't, Donald Rumsfeld and I thought oh my god man I've just popped up in Dick Cheney's house and I had to call my friend rainy mouse We watched him but Stephen Baldwin I was deep down in the zoo of the other day man

Splint a man he would have stopped bitching into man he would have stopped bitching about William bold wind Billy bold said you listen to me man Billy he's a strong dude he don't drive places he prefers walking and then and heped up in my inbox man. You got that. I'm sure stand-ins made it a bit worse. It was my friend pizza dog. Peta dog.

Yes. You know what the other day? Guess who I saw. Whoa, Stephen Baldwin. Shredder. Shredder. Shredder. You know what the hell the fuck was doing? Whoa, Stephen Baldwin shredder shredder He was dipping his pizza in a hummus

Oh, no way man! Wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy Why then awesome, why then awesome movie? Here's this pizza, here's this pizza made out of plasticine that I've varnished just for you, dude. And he was crying. And I said, hey, Billy Baldwin, don't cry because of my generosity. And he said, no, I'm crying because of all of my flaky scalp. I got so much dandruff and I said well

You want to get a bottle of head and shoulders and the guy to give you that is my dear friend Michael Woodruff Well, this is a long way to go man, but it was worth it when I got there It's not about the destination man is the journey I got deep into a chat with splinter was telling me about Daniel Lee Roy Baldwin born October the fifth 60 an American actor director and producer the second eldest of the four Baldwin brothers all of whom are actors He said Man he was in homicide life on the streets Blessing the true story of my life and bohlin falls man Oh, hollin falls that's some good shit. He hopes to baton your Baldwin show on radio station

Who else was gonna do that job? He said he was in the shadow of his other brothers. I said lay off it man. He was just less of a career And then I let a pop through my door agree in with me Lucy Yo Lucy Or is I calling back back back bald win back back back to the start Baldwin back Baldwin baby

He's looking a bit bigger these days Whoa, but he's still bringing sexy back back But I was thinking back to his early days What What a used look. So wisdom. So what emails? Whoa, dude. Forever. On a half-shell, there the heroes fall. In this day and age, you can ask for more. Bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, That was... No, but chicken tenders, yes, because those are groceries, and we deliver those too. Along with your favorite restaurant food, alcohol, and other everyday essentials. Order Uber Eats, no.

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