Pappy's Flatshare - House Meeting (Teaspoon's in the slats) S10E17
Episode Date: April 27, 2020Matthew, Ben and Tom slide into your ear canal for a catch-up. Ben has an amazing anecdote for us, which we don't completely trample on and overplay at all. Plus, some secret identities are/aren't rev...ealedPappy’s - https://twitter.com/pappystweetSupport us on Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/pappysflatshareEdited by Emma Corsham Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Do you want to see what the world is really like?
Yes.
Four things is deliciously funny and spectacularly entertaining.
A woman planting her course to free to pat in love for.
It's non-stop bonkers brilliance.
I love that.
Four things.
It's like theaters December 15th.
Greetings, listener dear!
I'm over here, I'm over here, but where is Ben? I'm over here, I'm over here, but where is Matthew?
I'm over here, I'm over here, I'm here, I'm here.
Everybody here!
Wow, wow, wow, what a terrible musical we've just met.
Oh, it was the real shame because we've been working for months on that but actually, it has the energy of a musical. This is why the preview isn't it? You put it out on stage
and it just fell flat. It was a really good regard. Refused to include it. I know, I know it's
we've listened to the dear the musical. That was um and we'll get there. We'll get there. We'll get
there. We just need a bit of a bit more tune I think. A little bit more tune and a bit more talent. Once we close to you thing.
A bit of a direction. Sure.
The storyline set.
Oh, I see. We have an audience.
It's got that beginning, middle one end, and it's just...
Yeah, exactly. The storyline, the storyline, I can't fault.
The audience, I can't fault, it's the three of us that the problem. As always, as always, but you cannot argue with that, it's got a beginning
middle and an end. It's you can't, you can't. You should remember that, it's the nicest
thing you could say about it. The reviews are in there. It was great. The reviews are
in five stars beginning middle and end, the five are entirely for the end of it. What
you sound like is a like a parent or a kindly answer your uncle who's just watched
three of their nephews perform a play in their front room.
Well, it had a beginning at a middle of an end.
You really showed something.
I think it was performed in the front room.
I wouldn't describe that as the response of a kindly auntie.
LAUGHTER
Because what's the, what's, what, what, there's no skin off your nose.
If she's a kindly, a kindly auntie, he also works for the Express and Star
and has to review it.
Oh my God.
The Express and Star are in.
Yeah.
So that would be the point.
But if, if, if you, if you're an auntie,
who's watching their views perform a show,
and the best you can say about it,
when there's zero consequences, I had a beginning, a middle and an end. I mean, either you're not an an auntie who's watching their f-fuse performance show and the best you can say about it, when there's zero consequences, I had a beginning in the middle of an end.
I mean, either you're not an ice auntie or the play was more dog shit than dog shit.
Well, we'll never know which one you're going to use.
We'll never know.
Is producer Corsair a bad auntie or are we dog shit?
We'll never know!
I think we will never know.
We'll never know.
I would be confused.
Let's not do that now.
So welcome to another fantastic episode of Papi's Flat Share House meeting.
Yes indeed.
The real pleasure to be back in your ear canals, Lister Deers.
We hope that you are looking after yourselves and staying safe during this strange old time.
Yeah.
As you can tell, we're recording this over Zoom.
So apologies and deviance if there's anything a bit weird about that,
but just, you know, you know what, it should just be like chatting to your friends
or chatting to your grandparents or all the things we do over zoom now.
Kindly aunties.
You've got to speak to your bad auntie.
You've got to speak to bad aunties.
You've got a pen and paper out and she's absolutely scathing.
Speak to bad auntie, she's got a pen and paper out and she's absolutely scathing.
Bad auntie takes the family quiz on Zoom too seriously doesn't she? Oh yeah, yeah bad aunties arguing over answers.
I saw you in a lot of screen. I saw you in a lot of screen. You must be giggling it. You must be bad aunties, the kind of person, and this happens in every Zoom quiz I've done so far,
where people argue whether it should be
half points or full points.
There you go, it does the math to me.
It does the math, sir.
Everyone's getting the same points.
Okay, I tell you what,
each question is worth 30 points.
It still doesn't matter if it's a half a point.
But you know, 0.001 of a point,
or a million points.
Are you not putting those scores on your CV because I am?
They are going in my record achievement, actually.
So enjoy the episode.
But before you do, we have to say if you like these chats,
get on over to our Patreon.
Patreon.com forward slash parties flat share
because we're doing daily episodes of a show
we're calling Flat Share Lockdown, which has been so much fun, we've really enjoyed doing it.
Yes, great. And they are, they're available for everyone who pledges five dollars and above.
So it's about four quid for episodes every single day of the lockdown to keep you entertained.
And they're really, really fun. Or you can up it to ten dollars.
Ten dollars!
Team Dime! Team Dime has done like a school year. And you get CFS Or you can up it to $10. Team Dime!
Team Dime as Tom Lites call you.
And you get CFS, you get the app to record and you get it.
You get video recordings of it as well.
So get on over Patreon.com, forward slash Pappy's FlakShare
and become a Patreon neighbor today.
But forget all of that for the moment
because this is a lovely episode.
This is an absolute doozy.
A lovely episode.
We really say some sacred cows.
We'll talk about it on the other side.
See you soon.
I've had a thought.
I've got an issue.
I've got a question I want to ask you.
I want to talk.
I want a chat.
OK, let's sit down and chew the fat.
Has beaten.
Beat it.
What temperature should we set the heat?
Has beaten.
Beatin'.
Why on earth am I always waiting?
Has beaten.
Beatin'.
Who went my bed while I was sleeping?
Has beaten.
Beatin'.
What's the point?
Does life have a meaning?
Has beaten.
So.
Verly?
Sorry.
That's alright.
Listen Tom, never apologise when you go to sing video,
kill the radio star and lose confidence halfway through the first words.
Never a place you're thriving.
No, that was a good game of name that tune.
Yeah, in fact, that's not a bad game.
Is it like one song, one you get to sing one word.
And your friends have to guess what the song is.
Okay. I'll do, okay, I'll do, I'll do one.
Oh, so you can get this one from just one word.
I think it's quite a, it's quite an obvious one.
Yes.
And it's amazing.
It's a good one.
One week. It's one week. It's one good one. But we, it's one of these.
We've got the garbage version.
You've got the extended mix.
It's two weeks, two weeks.
Yeah.
Oh, it's a sun.
Yeah.
Clarke, you're all going?
All the people, so many people, and they all go.
Not bad.
Producer Emma, do you want to pitch him with one word?
You want to throw in with one word or see if we can come up with the song.
Oh.
Okay, it sounds very similar.
Is it different to the orchestra?
No, it's the same one.
Different song. I think so.
Is this the song that you thought Clarky was thinking?
No, it was a song I'd already picked.
Oh, it's a different word to...
Is it a margin?
No. Great, great guess.
Good guess.
Is it... Do you know what I mean by a way, sis?
No. Is it all, sis? No.
Is it all right now?
No, baby.
It's not.
I knew it was a different all, wasn't it?
Yeah, it was all.
Oh, is it give piece of chance?
No.
We're stuck on the lemon trip.
You are close with, you are close with,
and Lenin is the right. Oh right is the right
It's a Beatles song. Yeah, it's beats is it altogether now from the L. S.
Marie all you need is love. Yeah
Imagine imagine going to all together now from the L. S. Green soundtrack before you go to their most famous song.
Intuitive Crosby.
When there is a straight route to the answer, why bother taking that?
That's so, yeah, anyway.
So it's not a bad game actually.
No, that could be a flat slime game one day.
That could definitely be a flat slime game one day.
You've got to sing one word of a song.
The first word I know about most things. Yeah, pretty much anything could be a flat-time game. The bar is pretty like what can be a flat-time game. That's very true. That's very true.
I was going to say before we got started, what I wanted to talk about was,
I got a flat tire on Sunday.
Oh, no.
Yeah, flat tire.
And it made me very aware of my failings as a man.
Because I didn't know what to do.
I had to call the RAC.
And did you have a spare?
Yeah.
Had a spare, had a jack, and I still was like,
and it trust myself to put this on,
and not to be halfway down the road,
and the wheel just rolls off.
It's one of those things that's actually,
once you've done it once,
it's like making an omelette in some ways.
No, it's an...
That means I'm not very good at changing a tie.
No.
You can't change a tie without breaking an axle, basically.
It's what you're trying to say.
It seems difficult, but once you do it once, it's very easy to do.
And it is actually a very satisfying thing to do as well.
So I would implore you to go out and just practice taking the
tire on and off because it's a really good jack yourself.
That's one thing.
That's once he once he's changed the tire, then you can go inside
and jack yourself. Yeah, go inside and jack yourself.
Well, here's the thing I think like, like, there was part of me,
I was in a car park in Central London.
There was part of me that thought,
this could be my opportunity.
I could look at it on YouTube and do it.
And another part of me was like, yeah,
but I've got to drive 40 minutes home.
I need to, you know, I need this car not to work.
But I think you're right,
it has, I do feel inspired now to go out and
try and do it. Because that's what that's what. Yeah.
I think at home you would have done it surely. Yeah. If I was at home, I'd had the rest
of the day. I wasn't having to constantly keep putting more money in the meter at the
car park. That would have been fine. But that's tough. Yeah. But I would have otherwise
done it. But I'll say one thing, I assumed,
and I know this is not, this is absolutely not their job at all,
but I assume when the RAC guy would,
when he showed up, he'd be like annoyed with me.
You know, I felt paranoid.
I thought paranoid that he was gonna go,
sorry, you called me out for just a change of attire,
you can't even do it yourself.
No, you're quite the opposite, I would say. They love that because they're on the job.
They're on the job, they've gone out in a half for per job. And it's like, ah, change a tire.
Beautiful. I mean, I can change a tire. The more people who can change their own tires,
the more this guy's heading off to find, you know, he's got to fucking fix some kind of exhaust or something.
Yeah, some kind of exhaust.
You rock up for an easy job, and it's like you get to be the dude in the situation, you
get to be able to take control, but actually you're not really doing any real work.
Yeah.
So it's like it's one of the best things I've ever done.
He gets to be the alpha with actually quite a beta job.
Yeah, exactly. He gets to. the alpha. He gets to be the alpha with actually quite a beta job.
Yeah, exactly.
Money for nothing.
I mean, you've really put the smack down on the RAC there.
Well, the RAC changing tires, like,
you're right, you're right.
What the RAC should really do is say, look, in six months time,
we're going to stop changing people's tires for them, unless
they've got like a legitimate reason why they can't do it themselves.
So everyone's going to learn to do their own tires, and unless you're, you know, frail
or physically dispossitions, our reply will be, do it yourself.
What if it, because the thing is sometimes like sometimes a jar is just almost
impossible to open and that's just a jar so a nut on the tire. Yeah, but you're only using
a hand fridge. You're only using your hands for a jar, right? There's a... That's true.
You've come and loosened it with it, take it off with his hands. He's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, he's, As of October 10th, we're no longer going to be opening jars. Everybody needs to open their own jars.
And then next up, shitty job became changing attire.
So it's just like the firefighter is in the cats and the trees.
They're just not supposed to.
They don't do that anymore.
No, exactly.
So they're not.
So no, because they've got to fight fires.
They've got fires going on.
They've got me in front of them.
If it's cat in a tree or building burning down, they've got to fight fires. They've got fires going on. They've got them fair enough. If it's cat in a tree or building burning down,
they've got to go to the building.
And normally it's a building burning down.
So they refuse to get cats out of trees?
Yeah.
So leave them there, yeah.
Just never gap in the market here.
Oh, right.
Like a little sample of the RSPCA.
Yeah, we're the cats of trees, guys.
Yeah.
And it's like the fire brigade on doing it anymore.
Cats, we know cats, cats are going to get a Patrilles, aren't we?
Yeah.
All we need is a ladder.
There's three of us, right?
One to hold the ladder, one to drive the van, one to climb up the ladder, get the cat
out the tree. I can put the cats up the tree as well. You can start the business going exactly. I'll get
it, I'll get involved. If you drive a net, and we're going to need a net. A net.
A net, to get them, what's the catch? No, no, I think you just grab them and you come out
and carry them down, don't you? You don't have to sort of I all say is it if I'm going up the ladder to grab at the cat. I'm going to feel a lot better
And I'm more confident in doing my job if I know
Clarkies on the grain with a net. It's the net for you
No, it's useful
The cat because the cats cats can be tricky customers, right? Like you know, yeah, but they'll Yeah, but they'll land on their feet.
Yeah, but they'll break.
They'll stop taking, they'll break their legs if they land on their feet.
Oh, right.
I assumed when the cat's land on their feet, I mean, I know cats can injure themselves.
I thought that was because it was a bad landing.
But...
So if you drop a cat off the Empire State building, you'll be like,
it's a bad state building.
Land on your feet, Mopsie!
They're on the right way up.
Okay, put them there back in the car.
It'll be fine.
It'll be fine.
The guns got this.
I just think, you know, like,
Avertree would be fine, you know.
Like, because you're going to take them in your arms, right? No, no, no, it's no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, but I'm saying we pick them in, we take them in our arms, we start climbing down
the ladder.
That's the bit, that's the bit you don't like, that's the bit you don't into.
That's the bit where you need a net on the ground.
What just in case you fall.
No, not, sees on the end of the branch, right?
You want to push you out of the tree.
You're grabbing, you're grabbing at this cat.
This cat doesn't know you from Adam.
Yeah.
I cat, cats are tricky customers, right? And they're proud. Yeah. So they're not just
going to be like they are they are proud cats. They're very nice. They're not
just going to be like, Oh, thank God you're here and jump into your arms. They
might be a tricky. Yeah, they might be scratching at you. Yeah. They might be
scared. They might feel threatened, they might be hissing.
So if you're 20 meters up an oak, you're not going to want to be fucking messing around.
So like, should things go awry, the cat might come out the tree.
Okay.
So what do you need?
On my watch, that's what I'm saying.
Yes.
There's every chance the cat's coming out the tree.
Yeah.
You're going up there. What happens in the leaves is your business as a professional the cat
Got my methods got your methods exactly the fact that you're going up there with a with a cattle prod
That's just all part of the cat out of tree process. That's putting the cat in cattle prod you're putting the cat in cattle
For exactly the the other thing
Is though how do we
And the other thing is though, how do we, like, presumably then what you need is a sort of big circular net with a hole in the middle to wrap around the every part of the tree,
because, you know, it's all well and good if Clark, you're standing there on the bottom
of the ladder with a net.
And if you push the cat out and it falls at the wrong bit, you know, it falls to me off
the other side of the tree.
Well, no, but I'm not going to toss it out. I don't know. I mean, if it's going the wrong bit. You know, it falls to me off the other side of the tree. Well, no, but I'm not gonna toss it out.
Like, I don't know, do I?
I mean, when you're talking about these cats,
for it to come out the wrong side of the tree,
I'm tossing it out, aren't I?
And also, you know, you've got to trust Clark,
he's reactions on the ground there,
because if I'm tossing it out,
the cats going upwards to begin with,
and that's gonna buy him at least a second and a half
to readjust.
Exactly.
Also, I have cat-like reflexes.
So you're gonna be up the tree as well.
Yeah, I can fall.
I can fall for great heights.
Sadly, half of our call-outs are to get clarky down.
I'm a member of our own team,
and in that case, no one's got the net at the bottom.
You're putting, I'm picturing you footing the ladder in this situation,
Crosby? Yeah, I'm happy to foot the ladder. I mean you were
Heights Tommy, you're all right. I'm okay, but like
not I'm not like, um, fucking evil,
cannibal, you know, well, I tell you the thing right.
Wait, how can I say you're not, you're not just, how can I say? You're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not, distance and the jump. It wasn't about... Yeah, but I mean a jump is going to make...
I've got some points.
I thought towering it.
I would say going over...
...on several buses.
He would say, go back in.
And you didn't eat?
Didn't he try to jump over the ground, can you?
I mean, I was trying.
Did he fall?
He didn't walk along the fucking ground.
I'm glad you're not watching that.
I was watching a man drive a motorbike in a straight line.
On the ground.
Yeah.
Unless they've got a couple of other guys stood on their shoulders
and they're sticking their arms out, then you watch that.
Yeah, please.
You know, the motorcycle display team, yeah.
That's fine, but anyway, I'm just, it's good to know anyway
that Tom isn't evil, can evil, because I'm really regretting
buying you that jumpsuit. I've't evil, can evil because I'm really regretting buying you
that jumpsuit, I got you for your birthday,
because I was, I got the wrong information.
I was finally putting the room at a bed, okay?
I know there's a lot of speculation
over the identity of evil, can evil.
It's not me, okay?
I'm ruling myself out of that.
You're now saying that the search continues for the true evil, Well, I'll tell you who did say like they knew a lot about
evil, can evil there and about, you know, distances required and things like that. I mean,
producer Emma, we're not entirely sure what she does when she's not producing podcasts.
It's a very good point. She's caution to the wind. Oh, I like it. And caution. Have you ever, this will smoke her out? Caution,
have you ever jumped over a double decker bus on the back of a motorcycle? Yes, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no. I'm going to say, for the first time, I'm going to say, say a first answer. Yeah, a first answer question. No, no, no, no, why would I do that?
Why?
Why?
Caution is evil, can evil.
We call it them just a very quick question before we move on.
And don't even think about this one.
Can you graffiti a rat on the side of a building?
Yes, no.
Oh, what?
What?
Why would anyone do that?
Too fed too, maybe.
You are the infamous rat painter.
Ha ha ha.
So it's this graffiti artist who's causing
bother round, round my way.
Round your, round your manner.
Yeah. Old rat painter.
So what kind of paint did you paint in the rats?
Right.
No, no, no, no. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha I would know. I would that. Poor things. It's like theaters for December 15th.
So, Clarky, we left all over you there for a second.
Yeah, sorry. You were asking what color are you painting the rats?
No, no, no, before the, before the, before the, what color are you painting the rats?
Which we all enjoyed.
What were you going to, what were you going to ask before?
Well, before Tom dropped the bombshell that he wasn't evil, con evil.
I, um, yesterday, and it'shell that he wasn't evil can evil. I
Yesterday and it's kind of related on a number of days. I'm gonna say yesterday is the song yesterday by the Yes, you got it. Very good. Very good. Now I cook it on gas. Yeah
So I put up a bird
Feeder on my balcony. Oh, yes, talk us through it. I had to try and connect to the underside of the balcony above me.
Right. Okay. Yeah. And I think I've done what I would describe as quite a ropey job.
You use rope. I should have used rope. I actually used a teaspoon. Oh, it's a spoony job.
Yeah.
Because, right.
Okay.
It had a loop on it.
Yes, Jim.
Yeah.
And I want you to answer quickly without thinking.
All right.
So, I'll keep.
Are you DJ Spoony?
Yes, no.
Oh, we got him.
We got him.
No, I said no. I said no. It's revealed. Everyone's secret identities are coming out.
This one, let's see, I think I said I thought I recognized you off of KISS FM. DJ Spoonie
as I live and breathe, right? So yeah, you do this. You do a Spoonie job of putting up this
beard feeder. So it just had a loop on it, but the spoon had a loop on it. No, the the the birds
The bird had a like a had a it was attached to it
It's got like a piece of wire with a loop on the end of it and what we're talking about
If you can elope the loop you want to get either Geneva on board
Now now there was a man or woman No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, It's like a porcelain kind of little dome.
Sounds beautiful.
Yes, it's the little birds and they can perch on, it's got holes on each side.
Maybe a little bit of water in there, they can drink a bit of water in the, in the little
ledge and then you put the food in the middle.
No, just food.
Just food.
They're going to be absolutely spitting feathers.
Literally.
Literally.
It's spitting their own feathers out. You've got to give absolutely spitting feathers. Literally. Literally.
They're in feathers out. You've got to give them a little bit of water as well.
Rocky, answer me quickly. Yeah, go on.
Here we go. Did you write and perform the song Buck Rogers? Yes, no.
Okay, okay. You're in the band feeder as I live in Bury.
Can I ask a question? We'll get back to the bird feeder as I live in Breen. Yeah. Can I ask a question?
We'll get back to the bird feeder in a second.
Tom.
Of course, you are obviously a man who knows his way around
that part of the world, the sort of devon area, right?
Yes.
You had your wedding there.
Now, living in
Devon and drinking cider from a lemon.
Yes. Is that a thing?
Interestingly. I mean, because I've never heard of it.
And I, I, I, I, every time I hear that song, I think,
what does that mean?
I don't know.
I don't know anymore.
He doesn't want to talk about it anymore.
He wants to talk about it.
That's why you try and pick him up on it.
He's not, he doesn't know that, you know, he won wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to know that he wants to Look, if you haven't drank cider from a lemon, then you've never lived. It's the only way to drink cider.
So what do you do?
Do you take a lemon, hollow it out like those?
You know, if you ever have the dessert in a curry house.
Yeah, oh yeah.
The sourdough.
You want to lay out the curry house.
You said, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
You've got to clear it out.
Yeah, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, no. No, no. What's the inside of a lemon off?
Be hollowed out and filled with sorbet.
You've got to do that.
So you hollow out a lemon, fill out the cider, drink it out.
It's very rare that you ever get a dessert in an Indian restaurant.
Am I right?
Very rare, but sometimes the little, the tickle gets you and you think,
I can feel some gaps.
Not since I was a kid.
It's so rare that you get to the end of your career
and be like, oh, room for dessert.
Oh, room for ice cream out of a penguin.
I think they're always, they're always like so surprised
when you order a dessert.
They're all, you can always see them
be like battle stations because they're kind of like,
whoa, someone's ordered the dessert
and they're like, you were getting picked
and they're digging away to try and find you in the... And that penguin, when it comes desserts and they're like, you're gonna pick to the dig in a way to try and find it.
And that penguin, when it comes out and hits your table,
looks like fucking Jack Nicholson at the end of the shining.
He's frozen solid.
He's been right at the bottom of the freezer.
That fuck has been there for 20 years.
You have to.
They don't hand you a spoon, they hand you a chisel.
It's just like, there you go, mate.
You ask for it, you want it.
We've got them because they're on the menu.
It'd be weird for a restaurant to not do desserts,
but we never have to serve them at all.
Yeah.
There's like a dessert a lot that goes off
in the Indian kitchen.
There's a wanker alarm.
Yeah.
You know, the two are actually,
I'm gonna have one of those.
And it's like, no, mate, you've had eight points of cobra.
Yeah.
You've had 47 points.
You only had two mouls falls of your fall.
Exactly, yeah.
An underlit.
In spite of all the bragging that hot food
doesn't even touch the side of it.
Don't even notice it, mate.
No, it's fine.
I go extra hot every time at Nandas.
If you actually have to eat something,
eat this hot towel.
That'll fill you up. I'm at Nandas. If you absolutely have to eat something, eat this hot towel.
Listen, that'll fill you up. I just eat this, eat this microwave warm style,
or wrap around the penguin.
Right, sorry, Clarkie. So, we're talking about this bird feeder. You did a spoony job of putting up this bird feeder because you used a spoon to reach it to the top of the...
Yeah, because the... So, I've just got a loop and then above me in the balcony above, there are slats.
Loving the slats.
In the slats.
So you've got the pair of slats living upstairs.
Lovely family in the slats.
The slats.
Yeah.
I've just been into them.
Absolutely refusing to engage in either one of our riffs.
Carrier.
And I think that's absolutely fair enough.
It's fair enough.
It's fair enough.
It's fair enough.
Let's get to the meat of the piece here.
The meat of the piece.
Teespoon, loop the loop the loop over there, the body of the teaspoon.
Put the teaspoon up for the gaps and then turn it 90 degrees.
Okay.
So then,
so we put a teaspoon onto your neighbor's balcony.
No, but thank really not because the slats are along the bottom.
They, there's also they've got.
There's like a floor.
There's a floor.
Yeah, okay, sure.
So you've got the slats have got a floor.
The slats have got a floor.
Lovely, my god.
Lovely couple.
Listen, we've all got floors, all right?
Look, they're just, they're making their way,
OK? They're trying their best.
They're making their way in the world today.
And that takes everything that you've got.
Taking a break from all your worries.
So Clark, he's absolutely furious with this.
Let's, let's, let's, let's play one, Clarky.
LAUGHTER
As far as I know, this story has a killer punchline.
I know we've got to get some attention.
I'm going to get some attention in this bloody passing.
This is so good.
Here we go.
It's a bad little hope here. Let's get into this.
We've got the teaspoons up in the slats.
The teaspoons in the slats. By the way, type of the episode. The teaspoons in the slats. The teaspoons in the slats. The tea spoons in the slats, by the way, type of the episode.
Tea spoons in the slats.
The tea spoons in the slats.
I'm on just like a stool.
Okay, Clarke.
He's on a stool.
The tea spoons in the slats.
It's a rich, a list of depicted.
We're all picturing the scene.
If you wanted it, if you want to draw it or paint it,
we're all on low,
feel free to send in your depiction of this seat.
Absolutely, your artistic rendering.
Arkeys on a stool, the teeth,
the slats, the feeders got a loop.
Where's the lemon?
Drinks well, the lemon's full of cider.
Just been taken out the freezer.
He's been drinking cider from a lemon all day. You've got to get it. The cats are up the tree in the
the nature of the car. His motorbike on the ground. I'm not the
cat from the cradle. And I'm using the silver spoon too.
The cradle, exactly. Well, it's good to keep the cats in the cradle. You don't want to
tack in the birds. Now, Clarky, so now you've got this spoon, it's dangling there, right? What's the
problem? It sounds like a foolproof plan. Well, it was. It's, well, I don't know. It's
the birdfish, if the bird feeder twists a lot, it might pull the spoon back round and then
it will come crashing down, right? Right. Right. You're a little bit worried about. Well, can you reach in there and maybe
get out of the spoon?
It hasn't happened yet, no.
Right.
So what has happened?
Well, while I was up there,
oh, can I just say that by the way,
I, that sent a chill through my spine,
hearing you shut clarky down with,
all right, so what has happened?
Because, you know what?
Attitude is what I expected from the bloat from the RAC.
And it's like, it's like final destination
because it was Sunday, what is it now?
Tuesday.
Sunday, I expected to get that feeling,
Tuesday I get it, but from you,
because that was, that was an absolute an absolute
dick slapping and I just a few words but no the tone.
So what did happen?
What were you telling us?
I was only as high as a stool.
He was as high as a stool.
On all the sidelines.
You were flaking.
Clarkie, are you in blazing squad?
That's...
Be honest.
You'd been on it all day, you were as high as a stool.
You were high as a stool.
I'd just go fresh on the crossroads.
You've got the munchies.
So you went for a curry.
You got the munchies, you decided to put a curry. You've got the munchies,
so you decided to put up a bird feeder
and eat it out of yourself.
That's it, yeah.
And he's furious.
I'm so sorry.
Oh, the tide has turned.
Glarky.
Come on, we're running for the punchline.
I'm sorry, you're so sorry.
You're sorry for this.
Sorry, we're running for this.
We're going so good.
Everyone is so good.
There's feed those birds, baby.
Let's feed those birds. I'm on top of the bag this bitch. Let's just stop and
suck fucking bag, mate. I got because I'm on his highest stall. This is highest.
Because it's happening on a third full balcony. You're standing on the stall, right? Yeah. Oh, you're standing on the stall.
You're higher than the stall.
You're, you're fatorous as a stall.
I'm as high as the top of a stall.
Well, no, no, no, no, no, no.
If you're stood on a stall, you're not as high as the top of a stall, are you?
Oh, right. Okay. Yeah.
You're as high as a man standing on a stall.
He's as tall as a higher than he would usually be. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. You're as high as a man standing on a stool. He's a stilter higher than he would usually be.
Exactly. Exactly. He's a stilter.
He's a snorkey plus stool.
Clarky plus stool. Yeah.
He's a stilter. He's a stilter.
He's a gold feeder.
And it don't.
Okay. So you're on top of a stool,
but you're also, what you're saying,
is you're on top of a first four balcony.
So yes, you are...
I started getting quite like vertigo. But also what you're saying is you're on top of a first fall balcony. So yes, you are.
I start getting quite vertigo, get very panicky.
Oh no, because you're not only looking up when you're on something like that as well,
kind of gives you like, I just feel like I'm about to fall over the edge of my balcony.
Sure, it's not a good reason.
It's like if you're looking, you know, if you look up at a very tall building, it's almost
like the building feels like it's moving. it's almost got that kind of like,
it's sort of a trick of the eye.
Yeah, you get a bit disorientated, you feel like I'm at the top of a massive ladder,
where I'm not at all, I'm just, you want to steal it?
It's high.
Yeah, it's a stool.
You're, you're stood on a stool, yeah.
Minus ladder equals business.
Exactly.
Anyway, I fell off the balcony, caught myself in a net.
Hey! Hey! Is it? Yes. Anyway, I fell off the balcony and caught myself in a net.
Hey!
Did you land on your feet?
I crucially landed on my feet so it was just like falling off just a stool normal.
Can I ask, how did a net feel about all of this?
She was absolutely furious.
A net slap, who net slapped?
Yeah.
It was above you if you if you do exercise down the courtyard
But a netslat luckily she caught you can I just say how slept the incredible restraint that we have shown to not make that a net joke until this moment
I'm so proud of us. I'm so proud of us for coming this far I thought we were gonna get all the way through but no, I couldn't I just couldn't hey
I was waiting until the time was right and that's loud right and I was right there wasn't I couldn't resist I
Couldn't resist it at all, but sorry, so what so what really happened?
No, I just I was just back to a lit firework, please
Parry
I firework is being generous
All right, don't go back to a freshly laid turd.
It'll give you better to go. Oh man alive.
So are you all right? Did you survive it?
Yes, you are okay now. I'm fine now. I'm fine.
I don't know. I don't know if it's going to stay up.
There's bird feeder, but we'll find out.
Also, I don't know if I'm going to get any birds.
The bird feeder.
She just got a bite.
I've got a bird feeder on my balcony and it's, it's, they've ignored it.
Absolutely.
Yeah. And there's like birds moving inside and moving I can hear them
and I can see them like just like properly probably a couple of meters away and it's right.
Can I ask a question please? Can I ask the question of Emma and Clarky?
Yes, no, yes. Emma and Clarky can I ask you now are you two cunts Chris Pach and Bill Ody. Yes, no, no. I thought the question was just going
to be a U-T-Cunt. Yes, no. No. I've got a question. I eat two cans.
No, yes, yes, no. I imagine if you were Pack a noddy all this time. Imagine if you're a pack of a noddy. So, so yeah, Carrie, I guess I have to ask the question,
do you have a birthday there?
I do, yeah, I just choose not to talk about it.
Is there a white spoon?
You know your audience, don't you?
Yeah, well, I just know myself, I know what I'm going to buy a spoon. You know your audience, don't you? Yeah, well, I just know myself.
I don't know what I'm all about.
It's bad, isn't it, when you get into it,
when you get into a story like that and you go,
well, it was, you know, I brought it to mention it in passing.
I'm playing Master's World because we gave you
so many interruptions, Clarkies, so many interruptions
that it was impossible for the story to work,
even if it had been the greatest story ever told.
Which by the way.
It clearly was.
Come on, we enjoyed it along the way.
Top five, top five.
And honestly, once Lister Deers bring it to life with their artistic impressions of
the scene, that I think it's going to get the life of a gay.
Absolutely.
So you see that fucker in montage.
Two, right?
No.
Can I just say, what we want you to do, guys, is we want you to go to your secret stash,
flame up a dube, get as high as a stool, and paint a little picture of clarky, okay?
Because we're not going to shop you to the fence, all right?
We know you're packing a little bit of a good
20, baby.
Four, 20.
Sure, we're not recording this on 420. It's not going out on 420, but 420.
420.
5% concern. It's 420 somewhere.
Um, yeah, please.
Guys, hire the store. Get it higher.
Yeah, there as a stall. Yeah, your pain, so whatever, whatever, you know, gets the artistic juices flowing and
send it into the world's worst anecdotes picture competition.
Yeah, so you can get it.
A papisflatshare at gmail.com, world's worst anecdotes illustrating.
Well, that's Danic Dote illustrating. LAUGHTER
LAUGHTER
This is not... This is so unfair, Flarky.
Oh, sorry. Sorry.
I'm so sorry to bully you like this, but it's been quite good fun.
LAUGHTER
Flarky, I'm going to ask you a question, though.
Flarky. Oh, God, tell me.
Flarky.
Follow up.
Jubilays.
Ah, I'll play this, bro. Jubilays,? Do you blaze? Do you blaze? Do you blaze? No warning?
It doesn't show me. It doesn't show me.
No, guys, guys, yeah, the, yeah, the lemon and then
the butter and then it will wash everything.
Guys, I haven't made a lemon bonk.
It's really, really good. Yeah, the buzz involved. I'm going to ask you guys a question.
Corsham and Clarky, can I ask you a question?
Yeah, bro.
First are you two cunts?
Yes, I can be.
Are you two cunts?
Harold and Kumar.
No, no. No, no. She, she, she, she, she, she, we did need to
leave in a second because we're going to White City. Of course, you are. Of course, you're
white castle. Oh, white castle. No, you don't. The BBC. The BBC of Taldor's not to go.
We're not allowed to watch the city anymore mate.
Have you seen how it's in Kumar Visitschepa's bush?
Really, really boring.
Even the comic legends of how to go, I can't say that.
It's just them trying to get a servant to
defect as well for ages.
The Cheeschen-Chong go to Westfield.
It's not that way.
How do I say that?
Right, well,
so learn how to change a tire basically?
Yes, basically, that's the that's the that's the takeover of this is I need to I need to go and learn how to change a tyre.
Yeah, and Clark, he needs to learn how to put up a bird feeder.
And tell them that it don't.
So what did happen?
Well, I suppose it always remained a mystery.
Okay, right, one final round of the game.
And then we'll go.
Because I can't feel like we can't be mean to,
we can't end on me being mean to Clarky,
because I feel awful about it all week.
That you won't.
No, no.
Right.
Okay. Okay.
You ready?
Because.
Oh.
Because.
Because.
Because.
Because.
Because.
Because.
Because.
Because.
Give us a clue. Give us a clue, Perry. Is is it it's not Beatles again, is it?
No, it's something you might sing if you've been blazing all morning. Oh
Got because I got high. Oh, I've got it
I was gonna put a bird bird bird feeder, but I got high.
Yeah, I stole high.
I stole high.
Stool high, baby.
Stool high, I was gonna tunnel under a bus, but then I got high.
I got high.
I was gonna drink cider from a lemon and you know what man
Make like I
Cheers everyone bye
Yeah. Hasn't seen anything.
Can I have a lift?
I live in Lonee. Hasn't seen anything.
Well, well, well. We promised you a doozy.
And boy, what's it? A doozy.
It was a doozy.
It was a doozy.
A doozy.
It was a doozy.
It was a, it was a, it was a, it was a, it was a, it was a, it was a, it was a, it was a, it was a doozy.
It was a doozy. It was a doozy.
It was a, I had a doozy and now I feel queasy.
So I'm going to go for a lie down, see.
Under the tree, see.
Under the tree, see, yeah, let's hope a cat doesn't fall
on me, see.
Okay, now.
Okay, we've lost time.
I'm glad, I'm glad the bad auntie's not here
to review that.
I'm sorry.
So I could say, what would the bad auntie say
if she was here?
What would she say about that?
Oh, you know what, there was lots of words weren't there.
I saw you were trying. There you were up there and you know you said all your words and so
there was there was lots of middle. I've been too much middle if I'm entirely honest. What were
used to get was like how do you remember it all? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You look like that was, you made that look like such hard work.
Yeah, and also we used to get as puppies.
Well, you certainly have a lot of props.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No.
We had that, we didn't, we had a show once
where someone character was out of all the acts,
you seem the most prepared.
I don't think they meant in terms of the quality
of our material, they were like,
you just brought a lot of things. I mean, to be honest, nowadays I the quality of our material, they were like, you just brought
a lot of things.
I mean, to be honest, no, we're dead.
So I'd take that, someone said we were dead.
And we haven't prepared since, have we since prepared since?
No, no, no.
So we're fronted, we would say we're never going to prepare again.
And that was our slow decline off the circuit.
Well, it doesn't matter.
Look, he's laughing now because now the circuit is entirely on zoom.
And we've been here for a while
We've been in your ear can I was for ages exactly? Yeah, thanks a lot for for listening to this episode
So find us on Facebook
Tell us a message at Papi's tweet on Twitter
financial Instagram Papi's comedy all of those things and
Just getting touched generally because we love hearing we love hearing through Papi's fracture at gmail.com
We've had some lovely responses from people who said
that listening to these episodes have helped them through this sort of weird time we're going through
and they absolutely. Those messages help us through this weird time we're going through.
Yeah. So it's a very, you know, it's a symbiotic relationship.
And there's never been a better time to recommend this podcast to other people. Obviously people are
home looking for entertainment.
So if you know someone who probably hasn't heard of the podcast and you enjoy the podcast,
please feel free to pass it on to them.
And ask them to give me a listen.
It'll be a great time to find more listener ideas out there.
Yeah, we would love that. We'd absolutely love it.
Also, why not chuck us a nice review on iTunes as well?
That always helps.
Exactly right. And nice review on iTunes.
Be the good on Tion iTunes as well. That always helps. Exactly right. And nice review. Be the good auntie on iTunes. Yes. We want as many good
anti-reviews as many good anti-reviews as we can get. Five stars please.
Feel free to mention the beginning in the middle in the end and tell us it
not like hard work. We'll take all of that.
But all that remains to be said is that this episode was produced by Professor Dr. Emma Corsham.
Corsham!
May not be evil, Caneville, and may or may not be the rat painter of Tom's Manor,
and may or may not be Chris Packerman Cheach.
We can't rule at any of those.
And that is still on the table.
All the fact is still on the table.
What a CV.
What a glorious CV it is.
So stay tuned for the Patreon neighborhood watch roll call.
Cheers everyone.
Oh, hey.
Will you please be upstanding for today's gracious neighborhood watch roll call?
He's a good man. Bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo-bo- So said all the girls. Oh, I mean, he's a nice man. Hello!
He's a horrid man.
I think I've got the measure of this crowd.
I think I understand this.
Well, this crowd wants this man is my favourite person I have ever met.
Hooray!
That's all!
He separates the Jetsum from the Flotsum.
And is that...
Oh, man!
I said he separates the Jetsum from the Flotsum.
What was that? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Please Danny Watson
Please raise your glasses and let me tell you about a good honest man
He is everyone's best friend
Everyone's he's a scoundrel. He's spreading something
No, he's a scoundrel. He's spreading himself in. Oh, boo boo. You know, he's a dickhead. Hooray!
And he is capable of writing some absolute dross.
Oh, we love him.
Hooray!
An asshole and a thief.
Raise your glasses for Matthew Elliott's horse
Let me tell you about a man
A thief. Oh! He's never been to the pub.
Oh no, no, he's not.
Oh no, he's not.
He's working.
A vagabond.
Yeah, this guy's a vagabond.
A vagabond.
A vagabond.
A vagabond.
A vagaboy.
Hey! A Venga boy! Hooray! It's a...
It's a...
It's a...
I'm coming in, Susco.
I'm coming in, Susco.
He's a back up, back up, back up, back up.
He is truly the worst man I've ever met.
But on the other hand, he is very nice.
It's David J. Price.
Let me tell you about a woman.
What?
I'll tell you about a woman and I'll tell you true.
A raw mother.
A raw mother.
A raw mother.
A raw mother.
A raw mother.
A raw mother.
A raw mother.
A raw mother.
A raw mother.
A raw mother.
A raw mother.
A raw mother.
A raw mother.
A raw mother.
A raw mother.
A raw mother. A raw mother. A raw mother. A, it's my wine out.
Spits out one meat.
She spits her wine out.
All over the Union flag.
What a flying it on land. It she's on a boat she's bitter wind out over the Union Jack. I don't know whether to come or to go. Oh, I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching.
I'm not watching. I'm not watching. I'm not watching. I'm not watching. I'm not watching. I When I saw this woman I spat out my own come
I spat out my own come which I was gargling for show because her name is Michelle
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. out as I tell you of this absolute shit stain.
Oh no, but warm and sweet treasure.
She's let me tell you she's finer than most musicians you will meet.
She's better than John Lennon man.
She's better than John Lennon, man! Right! Oh! She's better than Joe Strummer, man!
She's right!
She's right!
She's better than Paul Weller, man!
Well, that's not hard.
Unfortunately, she's also a despicable fuckface.
Oh!
Please spit out your gizm...
...for Anna! Oh, please spit out your gizm for anna, aleman!
Ha, ha, ha, ha!
Whee!
Hooray!
Hooray!
Well, let me tell you about this man.
I gotta say, let me just take a big sip.
Oh, yes, he's washed.
Oh, this is washed.
Truly?
Truly the first. I'm gonna take off your glass
Truly the first
The first at any party
His old
first at any party. To spit out his old gizm.
Oh, it's a good thing.
It's a good thing.
It's a good thing.
We are the gizm spitting club after all.
No.
We've got a swall our midst, get it out. Get it out!
We'll spit you out the door.
It doesn't trash bags.
We shall never swallow.
We shall never swallow as long as we live.
Taste it, then waste it.
That is our motto.
You'll never get pregnant when you spit it out. That we know is true.
You'll never have a stomach baby with us. Well, yes, well, yes, to the toast.
He's always the first to spit it out. He's been spit it out so so much he creates his own puddle
Oh
of course he does it's our best friend Thomas muddle
now let me tell you for the last time today. Oh, you must. A final command.
Oh.
Oh.
A man.
A former boy.
Hurrah.
A one day to be O-A-P.
Rolex.
Rolex. Rolex is what he's got. He. Rolex! Rolex!
Rolex is what he's got.
He's Rolex!
He's Rolex a full of life.
He's become...
No!
And he feels...
He feels fluggins for every member of the township.
No!
A steamy fluggin' fry, please!
Three for my house
Three for your household two for the shed and one
Both alike in dignity both alike in dignity
Me tell you been hold hold your boo Some of you can't hold your booze.
It's my end up with your own jizz. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha You can drive my car! A flagand, a flagand of cheers in his hand,
handing it out to round the town, around the township.
Yes, poob, poob, the unmistakable sound of his bright red Chevy.
Brum, brum, brum.
Brum, brum, it says, as he hands hands your flag and of cheers and says my name is Joel
Levy
Cheers drinking
You're having a stroke Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, She's drinkers AGM or as it's known in podcast land!
The Patreon neighborhood watch!
Roll call!
Cheers! I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I'm a man, I Do you want to see what the world is really like? Yes. Four things is deliciously funny and spectacularly entertaining.
A woman plotting her course to free to pat and not vote.
It's non-stop bonkers brilliance.
I love that.
Poor things.
It's like theaters, December 15th.