Pappy's Flatshare - Slamdown w/ Mae Martin and Tom Rosenthal (Test the Fire Alarm) S10E14

Episode Date: April 6, 2020

Neither “Tom!” nor “Ben!” want to test the fire alarm… so Matthew says we’re gonna have to have a Flatshare Slamdown!With Tom Rosenthal and Mae MartinFeatures: Trocadero, Bonopoly and 150 sq microwavesMae Martin - https://twitter.com/TheMaeMartinTom Rosenthal - https://twitter.com/rosentweetsPappy’s - https://twitter.com/pappystweetSupport us on Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/pappysflatshare Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Do you want to see what the world is really like? Yes. Four things is deliciously funny and spectacularly entertaining. A woman planting her course to freedom. App in love for her. It's non-stop bonkers brilliance. I love that. Four things.

It's like theaters for December 15th. Well, well, well. Here we all are. Back in the old ear canal as I live and breathe. Absolutely right. Welcome to an episode of Papi's Flatshear Slam Down. We're going to get the episode started in just a second proper, but we need to tell you.

Can we say this is the only slam down out there? Yes, we can. Yes, of course, yeah, of course we can, Tom. And what, to what ends? Did we say that? I'm just saying, you know, we're flat share slam down, the only slam down operating as a podcast in the world today. It's not bad angle to sell it up. It's not a bad angle actually.

No, it's quite confusing. If you spend your days googling slam downs, it's just us guys. It's just going to be us guys. And the only slam down on the market. If you have found us by googling slam downs, then welcome. So the episode is going to be fun. Yeah, sure. No, no, of course, you're absolutely you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're

you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're you're youumdions are available, but they're not, you know, and that's to our credit. Absolutely to our credit, yes. And so we've been in a relatively word that it turns out no one else is using it.

I think no, slam down's been around for a while, you didn't make up the word slam down. We can't let, we can't let you do that. Sure, can we? The wrestling must have, the wrestling community. The top of your air. Must have Hulk Hogan, theogan the rest to say about that well he never stops emailing us doesn't he? You guys you think you pioneer need slam down where once I can I'm gonna come round your house and lay the smack down!

I'm gonna sec those voicemails sounds suspiciously like you doing a Hogan voice. Oh, you're not trying to, you're not trying to blackmail us, are you? And send me those monies to my voice. Send me those monies. Oh God. Yeah. And you said me, your t-shirt size, please. Nothing intimidating to question. Nothing intimidating to question.

More than the idea that the person who's trying to extort from them doesn't understand what money is. So I'm a self-confident. Sorry, carry on. So anyway, folks, we're going to get the episode started in just a little bit. But we just need to say this was recorded pre-lockdown. That's why there's an audience. Don't worry, we're not breaking any of the

curve, you don't worry about that. We're not the kind of guys who are out sunbathing with their tops off in the park this weekend. We're all good for it. We're inside sunbathing with our tops off. We're inside with our tops off, which is within the top of the rules. We're tearing the tops off. We're in the top of the rules. We're in the top of the whole slogan style. That's the whole line of staking doors, you guys. Send me those monies.

So the thing you need to know about this is, when Tom Rosenzal says he's out on tour, he's not out on tour, so don't try and go. He's in on tour. He's in on tour. He's in on lockdown. And, and May Martin show is still available. Of course, the lockdown didn't change that.

Watch it, you can see it on Netflix if you're not in the UK, but if you are in the UK, it's didn't, the lockdown didn't change that. Watch it. You can see it on Netflix, if you're not in the UK, but if you are in the UK, it's on the forum, demand service, more for whatever it's done. Oh, but it's actually, but in one sitting like I did, it's really fantastic. It's a really, really great show. And guys, if you head over to our Patreon, we're doing daily shows as bonus content every single day for the $5 tier. Absolutely right. $5 and above you get daily updates from us. We're doing a flat share lockdown three times a week

and eventually when we run out of bonus episodes, that's gonna probably be all week. We'll be doing episodes of flat share lockdown. So go visit the Patreon. There's loads of bonus episodes to be getting on with. So enjoy it over there. But meanwhile, enjoy the episode. [♪ Music right. We are traveling to trendy hackney. Yeah.

We went all the way to Hackney. We're topping your ear canal to Hackney, everyone. We had some delicious, uh, say tan. Is that how you pronounce it? Get back, say tan. Get behind me. Yeah, we had some lovely say tan, beforehand, a lovely sort of vegan version of chicken.

And it was very, it was a very, it was a very, I felt like we integrated us as well with the trendy people of Hackney. We're trendy now. Yo, thank God for that. Yo, no, no. Do you say yo? Yo, yo, thank God for that.

That's how trendy Clark is. Do you very trendy things? Being obviously saying yo and praising God.. Do you very trendy things? Being obviously saying, yo, and praising God. What can be more trendy then? And that's the new message of this podcast, isn't it? The new message, guys. The real flat share. You're our life with God.

Yo Jesus. Well, anyway, this is not the story. That's not the story. Next, okay. We've come from trendy, having two of our trendiest guests. Yes, we've got Tom Rosenthal, we've got Mae Martin and it was really fun. We had a really good time. Yes, it was a great record.

Tom Rosenthal is doing touring as we speak I think. He's on tour and Mae Martin's new TV show is about to come out. Yeah, so it might even be out by the time the episode drops. We're very excited about watching. It's so amazing. I hope on to those things. The name of the show, available on Netflix and Channel 4. And obviously, if you like our stuff, we've got stuff for

available. Yeah, absolutely. We've got stuff available. We've got some stuff. We've got a Patreon page. We've got a Patreon page. And we cannot do without your support. So thank you to everyone who's a member of the Patreon. If you're not a member of the Patreon, get on board. Yeah, it's patreon.com forward slash pappy's flat share and every single Thursday we put out a bonus episode Sometimes two little bonus episodes go out to people It's a little extra beef or the jingles are single or a bonus episode of house meeting or

Some outtakes one of our live episodes and you can get all that Patreon.com forward slash pappy's flash it. It's always shits and giggles and there's lots of them. I've actually finished it that way, man. And there's lots of other bonuses as well. Just go along with the Patriots and go with the tears. And see what you fancy. Absolutely. Look at those tears and see what you fancy. So anyway, yeah, enjoy the episode, have a great time

and we're gonna slam it down. Cheers everyone, bye! It's been joy the episode and hello! Hello everyone, cheers! It's mad how East the I just went by along with it. Yeah, sure, by that's the end of that. End of the episode. TUM! Ben! What is it, Matthew? Yeah, what is it? Specky butte.

No. Fifty percent that I'm happy with. Now listen, one of YouTube has got to test the smoke alarm. Test the smoke alarm. Yes, mate. Come on, we're running out of categories to go for. Yeah, yeah. It's quite an easy job, but I'm just too short to do it.

Well, it's not going to be me. No? No, because last week, I bumped into the ex-arsinal manager, Mr. Venga, and he told me he hadn't tested his fire alarm, and his house burnt down. I said, Arson, he said, no, it was an accident. Hehehe! No, I'm telling you right, no, it was an accident. Hehehehe. No, I'm telling you right now, guys. That is what we're talking about.

That's good, lovely stuff. And if that's not for you, then fuck off right now, okay. What about you, Clarkie, my friend? Ah, well, I'm not going to do it Matthew because I was going to do it early on today, but then what actually happened is Tom left the sound desk at his house. Oh the sound desk we used to record this show, yeah, yeah. All this shows then I had to, while I was making my tea, drive from my house over to his

house. Well, this is a bit too real, isn't it? I picked up the sound desk he was supposed to bring to the show, but it's okay on the plus side, I've promised him it's all fine and I'm not going to keep going on about that. Do you? The worst thing about that was I sort of knew that someone was going to forget. So I sent out a message this afternoon saying, hey guys, not wanting to be too passag, but it was pretty passag, the message I sent.

Just going, don't forget we have bits of the recording stuff to bring tonight. You know, very nearly had to do the show. I almost forgot it myself. Of course I didn't always forget it. It's me. Not almost forgetting anything. Well, I almost forgot it myself. And then just get a couple of messages from Harry,

two hours later going, oh God, oh God. Send it over four texts. Yeah. And then a photo of him outside the truck of Dero. Famously, you don't live there anymore. No, you moved on. I'm going there for fun. Sure, to fun place. Well anymore. No, you've moved on. Let's go there for fun. Sure, it's a fun place.

Well, there's anyone we can settle this. We're going to have to have a Flash Esplanade! Flash Esplanade! Flash Esplanade! Flash Esplanade! Flash Esplanade! Hello and welcome to Flash Esplanade! The panel show that says, We all came out to mantra on the Lake Geneva shoreline

To make records with a mobile. We didn't have much time. For example and the mothers were at the best place around But some stupid with a flag on Burn the place to the ground Smoke alarm on the water Fire in the sky Smoke alarm on the water Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dunduh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh My word Yeah epic. Yeah epic stuff epic stuff there

We don't have to say we're live at the moth club very cast presents brought you by dice dot FM But we've never done a sponsored gig before so I thought I'd mention it exciting. It's quite a sentence. Yeah, it's a long sentence Not good at doing it again very quickly that smoke on the water right yes Yes, I was just I was doing student theater because when I was a student I wanted to be a serious actor and I was in this play where I had to get naked and smoke on stage. So I was naked on stage smoking this cigarette, I was thinking this is acting. So the worst pan to have ever seen. It's not behind me, it's right there. Someone's phone went off in the audience, right, and it started ringing, and then it stopped,

and I just kept pausing and smoking and ignored it. And then the person next to them's phone went off, and what became apparent very quickly is there were five mates, and one of their mates was trying to find them as a group, right? So the first one's phone went off, turned it off, then the second one's phone went off, and I had to stop again. Then the third one's phone went off, turned it off, then the second one's fine went off, and I had to stop again. Then the third one's fine went off, and then it got to the fourth one, and their alarm was, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, and the audience all joined in. Totally lost my erection.

Now, obviously you can't press that button on your own. That's to do with the spokane arm, obviously not the... Not Tom's. Anyway, it's... You can't press the button on your own. But who's shoulders are you standing on tonight? Tom, who are you brought? Well, bad news everyone, the Jamborees in danger. Oh, no!

Someone's stolen the sound desk! That's why I contacted the only friend I know who owns a sound desk. It's Tom Rosenthales! Tom Rosenthales here. Hi Tom, how are you doing? Yeah, good, thanks. Thank you so much for coming on the show. Thank you very much for having me on the show.

Now, before the show we were chatting and you said that you did, I normally ask what kind of a flatmate are you, or if you've got any sort of smoke alarm related stuff. And you said, I've got a terrible story about smoke alarms. and I don't think you're saying it's terrible as in like oh my god It's more like why just tell us that Yeah, there's no there's no more to be had in it. Well, let's Why me insisted on the telling us So what what have you got for us in my local cafe?

The place in Canembury And is it called the place? It's just called the place which is frustrating if you're trying to find a place. I'm knowingly vague, everything is a place. Someone was making a pinini, the lady was making a pinini. Oh fancy. Oh yeah, it's Canombri, mate. And then, but the woman from the cafe, making the pinini, she left to go next door to the dried cleaners, and then the pinini started burning to go next door to the dried cleaners and then the panini

started burning and the smoke alarm started going off and it was you know smoke alarms annoying in it. Sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee-pee--D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D-D You know, sat down and then an odd woman said, I'm so glad you did that. And I told you it wasn't funny. There it is. To be fair, at that point I felt like a fireman.

As close as I'm ever going to feel like a fireman. And then... Rita, I married her. The woman who runs the cafe came back in and she didn't know what happened and the old lady was like, you've got a teller. And I just looked at the old lady with a look that says,

I don't hear for the glory. And that is my local obstacle. Oh, I love you. I need to know what happened to the pinnacle and here for the glory. Yeah. And that is my focal of time. Very nice. Oh, I love you, nice. I need to know what happened to the Penini. Yeah, because that's the key. Yeah, just burnt to shit. Don't go to the place.

The place in Canaanbury is very bad for Penini, that's the only thing. They're all burnt. Well, thank you, Tom. No, that happened. That's tall for your real life as well, isn't it? There is an air-duty reality. It does have a...

Panini at the place. I'd go and see it. Free friend, obviously. Free Panini. Clarkie, who have you brought along with you this week? I brought along my friend-in-law, May Martin! May Martin is here. What do you mean, friend and lot?

Right, I know. OK. So, I was silly. So, May, what kind of a flatmate are you? Or... Have you got any smoke along? I think I'm home a lot. Like a lot.

Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Well, I moved into this house a couple of years ago. I'm in a different place now, but there were like five people there, and I kind of had to audition to live there. And so I came in to have the interview, and they were all sat down, and they were like, what do you do? And I was like, oh, I'm a comedian, so I'm never home.

And then I'm always home. And it was like my depression lies all over the flat like a carpet. I'm just constantly asking for phone chargers, that you open the fridge, I'm in the fridge, I'm asking for phone, yeah, so I think I'm annoying. But I'm kind. I believe you. Yeah, I get quite involved in the, I want to say this thing that I have to say it. I'm your amongst friends here, say it. But someone's going to listen. No one listens.

No one listens. I'll listen. You're mostly not for everyone. That's true. He doesn't even listen. I genuinely don't listen. No, he doesn't listen. No.

In any set to the term. OK, I want to say a little bit. Which is, I moved in that house I was just talking about. I moved in. And we're like ships in the night. These flatmates and I, I don't really know them. And there is this young woman. She's like 23.

And I barely know her. But she starts talking about her boyfriend a lot. And something about her story seemed like fishy to me. Like I was like, I don't trust this guy. She was like, we've been going out for years. I've never met his friends and family, but you know, I see him once a month, he's in the army, and he was like way older than her, and then he came around and I was like, I don't know, this guy, there were inconsistencies. I'm telling you telling you, I'm very abbreviated version, but basically, I was like, I basically, I went mad. I hired a private detective.

Oh! So cool. So cool. And the thing is, so you use the light to bury the lead on what kind of a flatmate you are. I'm a bit annoying. I'm a bit kind. I will hire someone to sit in a car across with a

cellar photo lens. It was really insane. You know what it was? It was a cross-to-hire appointment detected, by the way. Can we ask this? 300 pounds. Whoa. OK, so that's not chump change.

No. But what happened was there was another Christmas came round where she was like, I'm really excited. I'm finally going to meet his family. We're going to spend Christmas together. there was like another Christmas came round where she was like I'm really excited I'm finally gonna meet his family gonna spend Christmas together I was like we'll see and then like the day before Christmas He was like I got to go to Iraq or something sorry last minute. It was shame And also I listened to a lot of true crime podcasts. I was like feeling like an armchair detective So I hired this this woman. I googled private detective

And I got this website called are they safe calm and and I paid 300 pounds She did a whole background check so like and then she got back to me and she goes the man's a ghost Yeah, I love it. He's a, sorry, it's like the Sixth Sense. I know. No way, he's not an actual girl. It's like there's nothing that you can't put any details about. He's a ghost, yeah, yeah. Yeah, so she's like, it's strange.

Like how much of a footprint he doesn't have on the internet, basically. And then she was like, do you want me to put a tracer on his car? Yes! No, no, no, no, I got it! I got it! I want you to put on the credit card! I want it! I want it!

It would have been an extra 200 pounds to put the tracer, so I was like, I got to get out. This is so bad, but I never found out. I never found out, and I moved out and done. What you could do, you could get for take your laptop to be underneath of a car. Yeah. And then do the find my laptop thing on your phone.

Or find my phone, it's find my phone. It's find my phone's better. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Both good ideas though, both good ideas. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Although you'll be driving a lot, then you'll just hear bam, bam, bam.

Bam, bam. Bam, bam, bam. Bam, bam, bam. Also, also as soon as he unplugged the charger, you're done, aren't you? So you can only drive a couple of feet, but I would have loved it at Tracer. Do you think you have another family? I think so, yeah. I think you do like many girlfriends or like wife and kids, yeah, yeah. Wow, I think so.

Like, Dirty Johnny, have you ever listened to that podcast, guys? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah think so like dirty Johnny. Have you ever listened to that podcast guys? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah Oh podcasts are available So did he did you sharpen like his army kit or anything like that? There's another thing as well stolen stolen valor as I think where people dress up as in the army to try and get like Like you know, they walk around and moral people say thank you for your service and they give them money and stuff like that So I was able to find a picture of him in the army to try and get like, you know, the walk around a mall and people say, thank you for your service and they give them money and stuff like that. So I was able to find a picture of him in the army. I think he is in the army.

Right. And we are true crawling podcasters. Yeah. This one would be good for our viewing figures. Viewing figures. That's what we do. He does the podcasters. He uses it.

Is this not on BBC 3? Oh, we never told him. I mean. The scary thing is, I think he knew I was on to him. Because I would ask him a lot of questions. And so one night, she was asleep and he was in the kitchen. And he said to me, making ice cream ice cream ice cream ice cream ice cream ice cream ice cream ice cream knife in your neck. Oh my god, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I know, I know. You could have gone to the police. That's when I heard the private detective.

It's weird you had to go to Arthasafe.com after being honest. Just doing this simple question there. Have they threatened to put a knife in your neck? They are not safe. He sort of said it like he was just making conversation. Like, you know, the way you just mentioned that. No, no, no, no, no, I, yeah, I've gone on to the lives in Hall. I've got to make it stick a knife here It's a classic job like oh

Man I'm dating him now It goes so Let's read metal contestants We haven't met their flatmates They're ghosts Let's read Malcolm Testons. We haven't met their flatmates. Their ghosts. No, we're Malcolm Testons, but let's find out who is smoking who as we play round one. Canals on the birthday pick the cheats on top right right underneath Power shower for an hour, but they're gonna stop House lights, someone's scared, cheats on top,

Swingy, Wut, Brunk, Settied fire, Tune the photo, grab the bike, or go I'll watch you regime the surrogate indoor fireworks I'm watching a chicken messer in your fireworks Over those who knows where they goes for your Sunday roast Super cheeseless laugh, head fire they fuck with head Torque de cheese, cheese on toast, toast on seven after most We give you time to fire, but be alarmist Go get a window open, we give you time to fire But the alarm is gone, the girl with the dog with the guitar

The fire, nothing else in town, what's your name or sound The cake you make with fake tuna, another cheese, I'm close for more Your chippy splotch, you sing your song to the highest version Too many tea lights are light, both is too bright and blood is broken Have a song, just like your the club End of poverty, the motivebeque, the motorboat You said we were short and wild And once I'm tired, I try to know the line line

You're not good or far, but you can make me hold Make lemonade, I took the phone call from your head And I'm fucked, I keep on toast again I'm tired of trying to fire But the alarm is so broken I'm waking up open I'm eating a give you five famous names a couple of verses written. Yes. I can imagine. So this is round one. This round is the beep test, and the rules are very simple. I'm going to give you five famous names.

You have to describe each of these people to your teammates using a decreasing number of words. All right? So one name should be described with five words, another four, three, two, and one word. As it's a spoke alarm theme, we've got another rule. As it's a spoke alarm theme round, your names will be given to us by the Steve Miller band.

The categories will be jokers, smokers, midnight tokers, and people called Maurice. LAUGHTER So... LAUGHTER That is a deep cut, my friend. Well, yeah. For everyone, let's think at home, yes.

I did, I opened by singing a song by Deep Purple. I'm now playing around based on the Steve Miller band the year is 1973 you know you get one point for correctly guessing your five word name five points for naming the one word name we'll start with Ben your category Ben is Jokers sorry mate Clark he will start with your five word name please we got that oh I have to start with five start with a five yeah we'll work down give it this. I have to start with the five. Start with the five, yeah. We'll work down. Give it a, come on.

That's how the beep test looks, isn't it? Yeah, you start long, you end short. OK. And when you're not enjoying it, you get the fuck out. Exactly. Exactly right. So sweet, isn't it, when you get to leave the beep test? Well, I can't do it.

I'm not doing any more of this. It's mad, isn't it, when when you realise I could just stop this. Yeah. And then you go, yeah, but if you stop before you know you really have to stop, then your score is not going to be good. You go, where does the score go? Yeah. Doesn't it go on the telly?

Does it? I see it now. LAUGHTER LAUGHTER Ah, yeah. Lovely stuff. OK, Clarky. We've bought you some crucial time there, Clarky.

Clarky. Clarky is looking confused. Oh my god, this is going to be awful. I'll tell you now, five is the same number of fingers you have on one hand. Okay? Including that thumb. The sheep are eaten help. What? It's a powerful hikou. Yes, really.

The sheep are eaten help. Okay, and this is a joke. A famous joke. A famous joke. I mean, the joke, a thing, feels like a bum steer. I have a cookie. No more words. A lot of words.

How many coming out of your mouth? The sheep are eaten help. So who had some sheep that were eaten? Why don't you hire a private detective? Wait, like Mary had a little left? No Okay That's the game, am I on the right track with...

I think so The sheep were eaten and held Any ideas from the audience? It is the Boy of Pride Wolf, yes! Point to us! Oh, that's really it! Boy of Pride Wolf, is that is that our point you don't get that point the audience gets that point I mean the famous Joker though that's yeah, okay now I know what we're dealing now you know the parameters No, I'm so much easier. That's not easy. Is there a chance the audience is gonna win tonight?

So that's one point to the audience so far everything to play for Paul these before Turkey Crackers Chris was crackers yes Yes Absolutely right That's two points just like that Oh fuck is this some British slogan? Just like that.

Is it like what's his name from Strictly Come Dancing or something? It's not the guy from Strictly Come Dancing. For the audience? I'll throw it to the audience. Tommy Kibbres. That's it, correct. Tommy Kibbres. I'm so sorry, that was too tricky for you because it's a bit of a British cultural thing. Okay, how many points do I have? They get two points, but they get three points for that. So they're now on four points. They do pretty well.

Sorry, sorry. No, don't be. Okay, here's Johnny. Jack Nicholson in the shining. Lovely. Definitely in the Johnny. Jack Nicholson in the shining. Lovely. Definitely in the shining. Jack Nicholson was all looking forward. If anything be weird if it was him in the shining. He's for him playing the Joker in Batman.

Doesn't matter, you've got the answer right. You've got the answer absolutely right. I'm adding extra bumps to an already quite complicated game as we're proving it's proving right now. Final one. Final one. Wacker. Wacker.

Wacker. Wacker. Wacker. Wacker. I wish. Clarke. Clarke, Clarke, Clarke. Would you have said Wacker, Wacker?

I could have. Yeah, yeah, I know who this is. Wacker. Is that a mark? I can't. Wish. Clarke, Clarke, Clarke. Would you have said whack a whack? I could have. Yeah, yeah, I know who this is. I could whack you.

Is it a Muppet? It is a Muppet, yes. Is it... Fack, is it... Huh. Is it... Silence, please, guys. Fancy...

Fancy Bear? Fuzzy? Fuzzy Bear, yes. Yes! Oh, thank you guys. Thank you guys. Five points for that art today. Five points for Fuzzy Bear. Nice to see you guys the after.

I see. It's the worst Fuzzy impression though. That's hard. Well, you know what, Tom, it's your chance to address the balance, because here are your smokers. Smokeers? Tom Rosenthal, you're guessing. Let's start.

Let's start, Tom Perry, with your five word name. If you please. Um, I'll keep a diary. One. What was the last word? Ah, fuck that. I'll keep a diary one What was the last words ah fuck that I'll keep a diary one One yeah, I'll keep a diary one I'll keep a diary full stop one The cat's we smokers

The cat's we smokers I'lliori. The one is really confusing. But if I have my time again. Of course, yeah. I mean, how many times I'm trying to get in for a day? You're quite a few, you expect, wouldn't you? That is all I've got, ultimately. I keepa Diori. Oh, yes, yes, yes. That is all I've got ultimately. I keep a diary. Yes, yes, yes.

Okay, you've added the mind to that. What? I'm not going to get the answer. No, we're thrown to the audience. Who's your joke, Jon? Of course, his Bridget Jones. Yeah. She recorded a famous cigarette.

What? She recorded only cigarette show every day. Yeah, she did. much cigarettes. What? She recorded only cigarettes every day, did she? She did, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm genuinely in that film. You're in the film! Oh, it's more as an old film. Pretty darn strange. One line, one line.

Improvised. What was your line? You alright? Yes, now you recognise me. I know you've put you for a reason. Did you improvise that line, did you? Yeah, I'd, in the script, had no lines. And Renae's worker was, you know, being second to her bin.

And I just piped up. You're right. They stuck it, they stuck it in the field. Beaties in it as well, being beaten a little, a little partnership. She had lines in the script though. Yeah, of course she's good. Yeah. That's fine. So that was your, that was your wife, I'm so sorry.

It's okay, it's okay. It's okay, we say it one. That's fine because that was only worth one point. And the audience gets that. They are still doing good. Very well, the audience. Howdy, dude. Smoking's good. Fuck, sage.

That's not bad, that one. Yeah, that's good. Howdy, dude. Smoking's good. The Marlborough Man. Yes! He's the Marlborough Man. Two points.

Two points. Two points. By Lucky Strike. That's quite good as well, actually. By Lucky Strike. That's quite good as well actually. By Lucky Strike. By Lucky Strike. Keep saying. The Lucky Strike man.

By Lucky Strike. It's good, it's quite... It means that's really nothing to good. It's quite it's quite specific Yeah, but not necessarily in the good in a good way By by lucky strike Any any ideas I'm sorry. No, I'm so sorry. I'm regretting. Yeah. Are you in pain to get in the omniscient? Did anyone got it?

Don Draper! Don Draper! Oh yes! Yes! Yes! Did you say that? I don't know. I'm genuinely in that shirt.

Can I get your age? Victory Jazz! I mean, Victory's hours! I mean... Take a drink before you leave. Yeah, yeah, yeah, that was amazing. It was literally like they were right in the room. Victory's hours!

I'm really curious. The levels are in hours. I'm so sorry, mate. Victory's hours! Oh, victory's hours. Victory's hours! And also, Victory's house! Victory's house! Victory's house! Victory's house! Victory's house! And also Gordon's alive! Victory's house! Victory's house!

Hey Churchill! Churchill! It's Churchill! It's Churchill! Are you keeping a score, Clint? Final one! Final one! Oh!

Oh! Oh! Is it Muckley? No! Is it actually Guy Island's Muckley, isn't it? Oh, it's not the guy who has a gun. It's not the guy who has a gun. No, I didn't. You mean the same sort of ballpark? Oh, it's that fucking guy with a farmer who shoots bugs bun in it. Farmer. Is it? Yeah, I don't think I can allow you on my farts.

No, it's not, it's not on the farts. It is of course ballpark. It's pop-eye. Um. I don't know. It's pop-eye. It's pop-eye. It's pop-eye. It's pop-eye. not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's. It's not. Spillage! Spillage!

Spillage! Okay, well done, Tom. Thank you. Not so well done, other Tom. No, I do not apologise. May your turn. Now, you have midnight tocas. Yeah.

Now, this is people who have been known to blaze up a fatty, take a hit from the barn, or generally get wacky backage cans out on the Mary Jane shipbifters. Ben, you are guessing. Oh, this is hard. This is hard, yeah. Daughter of Billy Ray Singer. Miley Cyrus.

Yes. Miley Cyrus. Very good. Streamline. This is Cyrus. Yes. Miley Cyrus. Very good. Okay. Streamline. This is how you play. My four one is because I got high. Oh.

Oh. Oh. I was going to go with a class. But then I got high. I was going to bring the mixing dance. But then I got high. I've got to bring the mixing desks to their leg-eye. Now I'm at the truck of Dero and I know why. It's got to go.

Make it go. Make it go. Do it. Do it. I don't know. Oh, it's? It's of course the wonderful Afro-man. Yes. Kevin Smith movie. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. There's a few in there.

She's going to be Jane's son of a- Oh, well done, Clarky, absolutely correct, yeah. Yes. Okay, here we go. It wasn't going to be aim-it in chasing aim-it. Could have been Taskman. Thank you, Crossman. You love a Task reference, lovely with Mac. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay, guys, lovely with Mac. Okay.

Okay. Okay. Okay guys, here we go. Bowling Jeff. Ooh, so very good. Is it? Really good. Is it the big Lebowski?

Yeah. It is the big Lebowski, yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Isn't that clear to the dude from Big Lebowski? The Baesky and Big Lebowski isn't the guy who toaks. I'm still going to allow it. Okay?

I allow Fonsi there for fuck's sake. Okay. Final one. Final one. Final one. Inventor. Yes. Yeah.

You got it. Yeah. The guy who said it quite well. Yeah. Final one. Inventor. Yes. Yeah. you got it. Yeah, the guy said it quite audibly. Yeah, you're right. Oh no, say it alone. No, you've done enough. Inventor. Oh, what? Like... I, I, I come, may, no, what? What the hell is wrong with you?

Unless you're gonna go and put a review on iTunes. If you're listening, Matthew was not talking to me at that. No, no, no, yes. Jesus Christ, Christ be turned midway through, didn't he? I'm going to be at half a pint, but he gets, he's got a temper on him. I'm not angry at you, mate, I'm angry at myself. Inventor, so. I don't know if an inventor that's...

You do, you do, mate, you do. You do. Come on, Clarkie. Dyson. It's not. I'm afraid it's not. It's not James Dyson. Yeah, you are.

James Dyson, that's not. It's not. It's not. It's bomb, it's baggler. It's bomb, it's baggler. LAUGHTER APPLAUSE The Dyson Air Blaze. The dice and air blaze.

It's not, it's not, I can't really understand. I'm not sure. Do you know the answer? It is of course Elon Musk of course. He got famously high on the Joe Rogan podcast. He is a famous, he high all the sudden. That's why he sent the bloody car on us. Yeah, he got off the top of the wall, don't they?

What the car is, he's... Was he getting high for the first time in his life? I think so, yeah, I think that was... I can't imagine. Yeah, why not, though? Finally, Tom Rosenthal, you have the category of Maurices. No. No. Host.

Who's this show for? Actually, only us. I'm having a good time, man. Now, I've got to go. I've got to go. I've got to go your tiny mind. I've got, I do love to blaze. I do love to blaze. Oh, baby, I love the green. You know what, I've got right now, the munchies of all things.

Oh dear. So, so I came a bit unstuck with Maurice's, because once I thought of the novel by Ian Forster and the singer Maurice Chivalier, I couldn't think of any more. So I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I've I really do. I'm very sure. Yes. Rose and Tal is going to Google one of the people. Fair enough. Now, Harry, you are going to be getting better. Harry, you are going to be guessing.

And Tom, would you like to start with your five word name, please? I was going to pick a random five words from a Wikipedia. I think that's great. That's great. Don't give away her name. Singles, walk away and feel your... Now that's not finishing the song title. So that's a shame. And I would say what I should have done is just started without saying singles. We all make mistakes, we all remember Bridget Jones.

Single one. That's actually six technically. I've good singles walk away and feel. You know, if you can get it from that, you can have the point. That's why I didn't want to make it because I've told him, I've told him, I didn't want him too easily. So is the song walk away and feel no? No, it's Tuesday.

It's a different song. So walk away. I think you can't ask for our questions, Tom. That's very true. I'll get the rules of the game. But Maurice. Maurice. Maurice. It's a thing, I'm really sorry. I didn't know it was perfect.

It's a female. Yeah, I didn't have it. Jenny Maurice. It's not Jenny Maurice. Does, I didn't have it. Jenny Morris. It's not Jenny Morris. Does anybody in the audience have any idea? It's a Lannis Pyrracee. It's absolutely right.

Oh, I'm curious. I've got a little pill, Faye. I've got a little pill. I've got a little pill. I've got a little pill. Famously jagged a little pill. Are you Mr. Jagged a little pill? Jagged a little pill, ever.

Three, three words. You didn't get that. Famously jagged little pill. What was your clue for Lenny's more upset? Singles walk away and feel, I think. That's crazy. Singles walk away and feel. I mean, would you like to use the same technique for any other exercise? He's got the other one, so he's not going to the other one.

I'm really not sure if it's the right guy. OK, you can't say guy, all right? It gets general. There's four, half of them in the chance of them being guys, isn't it? Come on, there we go. Well, it's not this one. Gender is a spectrum, so it's not half to chance. Anyway, let's go get bogged down in that.

Tom Rosenthal, your four word name, please. Old British bells dance. More stances. Yeah, sweet respect. Old British bells dance. Morris dancers. Yeah, sweet respect. Are we going to allow dance? Are we going to allow dancers? Hang on, so that's a specific Morris dancer. A Morris dancer, yeah.

But yeah, but old British bells dance, you put dances in the name. It's a good point. But a Morris dancer. A Morris dancer isn't a person. Yes, it is, I dare you. My father's a good point but the more it's done so it isn't a person. Yes, it is. How dare you My father's a Morris dancer look what should go blackface you get canceled I'll give you the points very enough. Sorry. I apologize. It's okay about one next one racist loves animals

Boris it's a great one. It's a very good clue racist love animals It's a great one. It's a very good clue. Races love animals. Morrously. Yes. It's correct. Really good. This is how we play. Races love animals. I know, I know, it's serious. Singles walk away and feel. If you've not heard of it, you've not heard of it. That's fair enough. My reference is a woefully out of date. I would be really annoyed if I was on their team and I was allowed to use Wikipedia and

then we got the points. That's not right. Brass, I. Go. Oh, yes. Oh, no. Elon Musk going those it. Oh, very strong.

Chris Morris, sir. Yes, sir. Chris. And the final. And the final. And the final. And the final. And the final. And the final. Oh no, Elon Musk going knows it. No. Very troll. Chris Morris, sir. Yes, sir.

Chris, sir. And the final one word answer, which is brought to you by taps. Shop. Shop. Moronsons. Moronsons, yes. Moronsons, yes. Yes, yes.

Here you go. Cheers. Redemption he got the right. She's redemption. That is the sound of redemption. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. Okay, now at the end of that round, but you took a quick, can you tell us the scores please? So the scores are, Ben and me have 19. Tom and Tom have 20. Bloody hell, but the audience have 21.

Fuck! So the audience are in the lead. But does! So the audience are in the lead. But does that mean that both teams you have courts for alarm will find out in part two? In the meantime, please do not skip these vital important advertisements. Do you want to see what the world is really like? Yes. Four things is deliciously funny and spectacularly entertaining. A woman plotting her course to freedom at a lot for her.

It's non-stop bonkers brilliance. I love that. Four things. It's a like theaters December 15th. Welcome back to Flash Air Slantdown. Now before the break, pre-break. Pre-break. The audience were in the lead.

Mental. With, I believe, 21 points. 21 points. But there is still, literally, everything's a play for because this, I mean, you could still get, you could still... It's the audience's win. Yeah. Full refund. Oh, no, Thomas. I'm going to have to run that past a cast live brought to you by...

Oh, very kind of. That's right. Does look a bit now, like I've asked that guy to get me a bottle of water. No, that's not... Is that your jeeps? We explain, explain what just happened. What's going on? What's that? Is that your jeeps? We explain, explain what just happened. What's going on? What's that?

Can I end when was it Harry? Harry? Offer to buy a support list campaign. I just hate it. The rest of you need to raise your game, guys. Wait, a second ago we were probably going to have full refunds. This is a very mixed, very mixed mess just here, isn't it? Are we living in a socialist utopia?

Didn't check the election results, but maybe? Merry mixed messes here, isn't it? Are we living in a socialist utopia? LAUGHTER Didn't check the election results, but... I think? LAUGHTER I don't keep up with the news. Let's look, will I get home? LAUGHTER So the audience are in the lead, but there is still everything to play for,

as we heard, all into round two, it's flat game! Yay! Let's make a game, Let's make a game, Let's make a river, Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Let's make a rapper roll a dice Finna play, put that back Do what you told

Yeah! Do you think you can do nothing Yeah! When you get cold, cold God listen to that No! That's the sign of the cold fight I heard it! I heard it! Listen to that! No! That's the sign of the call for him! Yeah!

That's the right hair to hold! Listen to that! Now, fuck, I was off a cliff! I hit them, I've drank the call weight! Dave, there is something that the Jones Town Cult about this... That's my favourite part of the show. That's your favourite part of the show? Little glimpsing to being a cult leader.

Yeah! As opposed to just a... That's your very part of the show, we're little glimpses into being a cult leader. Yeah. As opposed to just a... Anyway. It is indeed flat games where we're playing our version of Monopoly, which we're calling Bonopoly. Yes, please. Bonopoly, pure flat slant. Bonopoly, well it's better written down.

I'm going to ask our contestants to sing about something from the game Monopoly to the tune of a song by you two. LAUGHTER Their team has to guess... Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, You'll get a point for a correct answer and up to 10 points for how much actin' you give your baby. Yes, the year is 1990. We will start with Ben Clarky. So you're singing with her without you. May, what is she singing about?

Here we go. Oh Jesus, he doesn't look confident See the man drumming on a bin See his shop I could go in But I need a See the shops are unique, but I still just need to go. I need a poo. I need a poo. I need a poo. I need a poo.

Oh no! I can't go! I'm so happy for a poo. Okay, he's going lucky. There's a McDonald's over there. I could go and pretend to buy and I'll have, this is the process I went through. I need a boo! I need a boo!

Everyone, I have the mainstream London I need Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, That ross and Rachel won't be the same again. Essential perk or toilet, is there? I do drink a lot of coffee, don't they? It goes straight through, yeah. So, so may, have you got any idea about where or what Clarky was thinking about? Yeah, but I can't remember the exact phrasing on the monopoly board, but it's Oxford. Circus? Street. Oxford Street. Oxford Street is correct. Oh, yeah.

Oxford Street. We've all been there. It's a great place. It's decorations at Christmas time. We need more ways to eat a poo. Right, play Sal and poo. The man drumming on the bin was good too. That, yeah, that's the best thing.

Downstairs in Topshop. No. Downstairs in Topshop is is good place to have a put If if there's never any what there's different way those are changing rooms So Tom Rose does up next Matthew what's in points wise there oh, oh, yes, points, points, points, points, points. So for the song itself, I mean, that was very... It's gonna be big.

Very, very, it's gonna be big. It was great. I'm gonna give it a 9 out of 10. 9 out of 10. And of course, the point to make for getting it right as well. So that is 10 points. Now, I've had a question. Yes, of course. Well, do you all use going to get a guy like this?

Who could... Yeah, well, I'll pick a YouTube song for them, yeah. Sure. He'll be an album track. LAUGHTER Hope you bought an in-depth knowledge of the Joshua Tree, guys, because otherwise... Yes, glued.

OK. Tom, Rosenthal, now Tom you message us this week to say that for medical reasons you cannot sing. Well no, I just have bruised vocal cords at the moment, which is why I'm sort of speaking slightly, because my general comedy vibe is much more sort of like a squeaky man. And 2019 was quite a good year, so I squeaked myself out. So you've worked your vocal chords basically so I can talk to this but like ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah there's no way out. Oh yeah yeah oh dear. You're a beautiful singing voice. He's such a shame. So you're the Millennials Joker Squally.

On that point actually can I borrow your phone to Wikipedia YouTube? Because I'm not entirely sure I would. They're not a big baddie. They're not a big baddie. It's singles, weather, streets and... Why? They're managing a one-backing. So, I'm definitely...

I'm going to take the saying, you're going to do a spell. It's just to let you know it's very much against Drs orders. I thought it was very bad to drink and it's for your vocal cords to dry out. But obviously, there's no doctor said don't come on this podcast. But I just said don't come on this podcast. And I'm going to bring in it. We appreciate that. So I still haven't found what I'm looking for is the song you're singing. Is it my sound desk?

And a- And you've got what you're singing about right there. Now Tom, you have to guess. And DJ Gwynn, will you play it? Did a bad thing in my life made bad decisions kill somebody now I'm here. It's not very nice. All can run. We'll get the damage I did to those poor families. So much blood, but I still haven't found my alebide. I still haven't found shitting off our fucking lawyer, he's screw me over

Yeah, I mean you can finish there That's very kind of you know what a gorgeous voice nevertheless we enjoyed it very much Tom power if you got any idea what Tom was singing about. Jail! Correct! Correct! Bro, go straight to Jail. Go straight to Jail. Jail on pass go. Do not pass go.

Do not collect 200 pounds. Those are the rules. I don't make the rules. I just stick to the... We often don't collect 200 pounds. No. Not tonight, anyway. Not tonight. So, I'm going to give Tom, I think, a seven out of ten for the song and of course a point to carry that is

8 points there May Martin There should be no there should be an awfully thing Okay, yeah Okay. Yeah. Not just trying together. Okay. Just like that. Your song is one and Ben what is my attention to convey in song? Okay Now Now, it's not getting better, but I taught it how to sit at. But I'm starting to get worried

That I should have got a cab But it's too late Tonight, I'm just saying this song is okay To take this thing out into the night It needs the toilet bar So asleep It needs the toilet, but I'm so asleep, but it moves around me. It's got very sweet feet. Oh, I love it. I said it.

I said it, I said it, given it more, like, I should have made it more like sexy. You know what? I don't know, you know what? You know what? You could make it more sexy. Let's hear it more like sexy. You know what? I don't know who's in it. You know what? You could make it more sexy. Let's hear it again, guys. Play it again. Sorry.

I'm sorry. Um, uh, the dog, the dog, the dog, the piece, the counter, the dog counter. The little scotty dog. The little scotty dog. Yes, yes. Klocky, pack yourself with these answers, man. He was spot on little feet. Nailed it. I think I'm gonna give you I'm gonna give you for that song Eight points for that song I'm going to keep you for that song. Eight points.

I'm going to be eight points for that song. That's nine points there. Thank you very generously. Now finally, Tom Perry. You're very welcome. Tom Perry there, you go. Yes. Here we go.

Six on fire, please. So, Perry, I'd like you to get your dodgy Spanish counter and get the ready because your song is of course, Vertigo. They're number one! They're number one bigger spanger. We can all agree on that. All the others have been slow. Yeah! But this is more in your range.

You're an energetic man. It's a lot of speak singing. Here we go. This is Vertigo. Now Tom Rosenthal, what is Tom Paris singing about? Off we go, Gwyn. Oh no! Josh! Oh no, Josh! Chris, that's my style! Oh no!

Oh no! Josh! I'm... Yeah. Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no's good. Hello, hello, hello, hello, hello, I'm going to God and I want it all. My God, I'm walking around and I'm sexy in some kind of outfit. Hello, does, does, does, does, does, what does, oh DOS! Sorry, I'm late! I won!

Now I'm going on holiday, I'm related, I'm in honor, magazine cover, I'm not DOS, I'm UNO, baby! Top priority! Top priority! What's up? I'm out. I'm out. I'm out.

I'm out. I'm out. I'm out. What's that about the card game, UNO? Oh God! No! No, no, no! No! What's that about the card game, Uno? And... Shit! Tom Rosenthal, what monopoly-related thing was Tom Perry singing about? Break it down, talk us through what you remember of the lyrics.

Basically, he was a guide, won it won it all who was wearing nice suit. He'd once he'd won something certainly yeah, right Not even the audience know it this time But he's not he's not just like the monopoly man. He's not just one monopoly. No, he's not the monopoly man himself. He's My god, did you say I just take a chance. I think he said he's going, he's, he said he's going on holiday but it's unrelated. He's going on holiday, like, ignore the fact he's going to hold it. He's going to hit a background. So you're going to be unrelated. Take a chance, Don, just, just take a chance. It will, I'm not going to be next. I understand. So there is, it's, it can't just be a chance It's like a when you win two hundred pounds for winning a beauty conference

So, could you took win what are the scores at the end of that round? The scores are 38 to Ben and me, 38 to Tom and Tom, and 31 to the audience. Oh, we're not lagging behind guys. Well, next up, for January is over, which means time to play. People are judging and they're raising their lives. It's because we got to go twice, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah.

It's hard to win. Yeah. It's really, it? Yeah, yeah, it's hard to win Really really hard to win if it's just just to make you feel a little bit better about yourself. I've never won once Don't a hundred of these never one once. Okay, next up the gallery is over which means it's time to play beat brothers Yes, it is indeed, brothers, where each week we ask our panelists to sort out a flat shirt, this is ostentatious, it really is. So someone in the audience has bought us a bottle of champagne, thank you very much to Harry. And we could have... But if you listen to him... But if you're listening at home, you could buy us a metaphorical bottle of champagne. Thank you very much to Harry. And we're going to join on... But if you're listening at home, you could buy us a metaphorical bottle of champagne by joining the Patreon. Absolutely right, yeah. Not a bad bit of business.

Two goldsmiths would have loved that. He would have absolutely loved that, yeah. A bonus episode out every Thursday, five dollars or above. So yes, it is B-Froze. We're each week we ask our panelists to sort out a flat-share based beef. And today's one comes from Jake and Kimberly. They are in the audience.

Jake and Kimberly, are you there? Hello. Hi. Hi. Jake. Hi. And Kimberly. Hello.

Hi, guys. Now, Jake. Do you do your friends call you Jake? No. A little bit of a Jumiracwai reference. Lovely. Hello. Hi guys, now Jake... Did you do a friend's call you Jake? No. A little bit of a Jemiraquai reference. Lovely. Don't burn the next round mate.

Jemiraquai, are we doing this? It was actually a bridge over the river Jemiraquai. We haven't come up with the rules, I just do that on the fly normally. So, Jake and Kimberly, this is actually written by Jake, but they are both involved. My girlfriend and I have been living together 18 months, congratulations. And since we moved in, I have argued we should get a microwave. She is against the idea, as, and he quotes, they are too big and ugly. Frankly, I think this is nothing more than snobbery.

A microwave would enrich our lives, I am certain. Most worrying for me, my parents have been having the same beef since 1984. This is key as well. There's a little envy at the bottom Kim has agreed that if we are if we're chosen and she loses She will buy a microwave up to the value of 30 pounds Hi states Can I can I tell you now? I'm not afraid to say I'll double that I'll add 50 percent. You'll buy them two micro.

I'll add 50 percent. Jule microbes, guys, yeah. How fast do you want these rustlers burgers? So, Tom and Tom, you are on Jake's side, Ben and May, you are on Kimberly's side. So Jake is pro microwave, Kimberly is anti-microwave. I think before we have all of that, let's have a quick cross examination. Let's start with Jake. We have a we pro microwave.

You're pro microwave, you're on Jake's side, pro microwave. You're vehemently anti. You're vehemently anti on Kimberley's side. Correct. Let's start with a few questions for Jake. Anyone got any questions for Jake first of all? Yeah, or? What's your fucking problem, mate?

Chill out, mate. There you are. Right. I'm juicing you're on that. Someone take the champagne away from Clarke. Any questions for Jake, you know, within the rules of beef brothers here? No, no, no, badgering the witness.

What cooking facilities do you otherwise have in your kitchen, please, Jake? Great first question. Thank you. An oven and a four-hop thing. Mealy an oven. Yeah. Sorry, merely an oven and only a what?

A four-hop thing of very four. Only four. Yeah, varying sizes. Wow. That's soon. Dangerously close to conjecture, they're, Harry, but I'm going to allow it. I'm sorry, do you have a toaster? There's a toaster, yeah.

Come in, I'll stricken from the record. The toaster remains, Tom. I'm afraid you're fucking toast in a microwave. Objection, you're on it. And a castle of that, Councillor. Tom, I told you about this. You can't over all yourself. I wish I could. No, no.

You never can't. Sorry, Jake, we spoke over you there. That's very rude. I said we had a kettle as well of that count. You've got a kettle as well. Sorry. Is that noise that way? Is that a kettle?

Yeah. And as my point lying, May has already sent a private detective to your kitchen. Come on, time for this. Any other questions for Jake at this juncture? What don't you have in your life that you wish you could that you want to cook in a microwave? Er... Good question, a bit loaded, but... Er...

It's a big question. Well, I think it's more for like heating leftovers and stuff. Well, that's what I'm saying, like, what kind of leftovers would you like to reheat? I wasn't just saying what's missing. What's the actual point of this? He's a striker. What?

Your dad not love you, what the hell are you talking about? I'm on your list. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Projection your own. LAUGHTER APPLAUSE I just feel more meals you want to cook, mate. Well, I ain't eating a very aggressive way, mate, alright? It's the focal chords. Can we take the champagne away from Tom as well?

It's the focal chords. You can't blame your focal chords for everything. I know you didn't want to sing, alright? Bruce fucking focal chords didn't come down the last shower, mate. Right. Jake, erm, so talk us through the kind of leftovers you'd like to make. What kind of microwave meals we'd like to see? So my dad actually falls down on the, on my side on this issue that he wants microwave. That's a very good point.

Yeah. This is your parents' beef as well as it is your beef. Yeah. And he thinks, my pro microwave, and has he, has he won the beef? Presumably not. Er, they had a microwave for a bit. There's some issues there. I think there's not big deepened at us, but I...

We need to scatter it. Anyway, so they had a microwave for a bit, and don't cover them. But they just don't keep it in the kitchen. Whoa! Oh no! How close to the toilet do they keep it? That's okay.

That's okay. How close to the toilet they keep it? That's the truth. So they don't keep it in the kitchen? Yeah. Where do they keep it? So they live in a flat above a shop and they keep it downstairs and like... In the shop? That's not the microwave. That belongs to Mollies, alright? The lottery ticket machine, that's downstairs as well. It's in like the shop's storeroom for lack of a bit of word.

So basically they don't use a microwave. They've been stored in the shop store. But when I stay though, I use it and then I got told off for spilling soup up the stairs. But then I was like, well that's because you have the mic way downstairs. I can't wait to stop for a second. I can't see you, I can only hear you. Yeah. Are you Tom Rosenthal doing a character? Because this is an amazing... It's very trippy.

Yeah, no worries, please, my good God. I'm just throwing this fucking voice over that. It's very sweet you'd think I could play a character. You've all seen Bridget Jo. Friday night, Michael, I have to do this. I don't know Bridget Joes. Friday night, Michael, I've done this. Okay. I've got a question. Any other questions for Jake?

Then we'll move her to Kimberly. Jake, who does the most cooking in your house? Big question. Huge question. Kim, does the majority of the cooking have? Let's talk to Kimberly for a second. Let's move her to Kimberly may has a question Kimberly

If I if I understand a correctly Kimberly you have this boyfriend He's got all kinds of urgent pressing needs. He's spilling soup up the stairs. And life moves very quickly, and you don't mind slowing it down a bit, taking your time with things, reheating things in the oven, am I correct? That is exactly my position. Thank you, Kimberly. Flitation, you're on it.

Talk to me about this boyfriend, Kimberly. I actually don't have a micro-hip Kimberly, and I don't ever miss it. Your honor, this is a blatant flirtation. She is seducing the witness. I'm going to allow it. Also, where are you from Kimberly? Did she have an accent?

She'll find out. That was a genuine question. I'm from everywhere, so... The plot is taken from her as a tall voice. How big is he kitchen? I would say our counter space is about four micro-eves worth. Oh, you see? And how big is he kitchen? You just got a counter. Do you

even use ages? I don't want a microwave but you don't have a microwave but you measure everything in my microwave. This flat is about go by my co-hairs. I'm going to go by my co-hairs. I'm going to go by my co-hairs. I'm going to go by my co-hairs. Any further questions for Jake or Kimberly? Kimberly, go on. Sorry, I have one. Yes, of course.

Are you, by any chance, sensitive to dangerous radiation? Are you human? Yeah. That's my point, though. I made a point in my question. Are you worried about the British? It's extremely worried. Have you watched Chernobyl recently? Do you have a dog?

It keeps me awake nights and no. Okay, right. I think that's all the questions. We're all bummed out now, aren't we? Sorry for bringing that British. It's okay, it's all part of the process. Okay, hopefully that's enough information for our team to make their cases. So without further ado, I'm going to call up... Can I ask one final question?

One final question, of course. You're a Chicago-town pizza. I can't see, I have. I think I've just saved that case, Tom. I can't see, I have. I think I've just said that case, Tom. Okay, so Tom, Rosenthal, you have one minute to begin the case for the prosecution. Now remember, you are on Jake's side. Your minute begins now.

Well, ladies and gentlemen of the jury or however the fact this works. He's adopted another character. Oh, I had a very sad, very sad tale from poor, poor Jake. May or may not have actually with his father. Of a regressive gender normative relationship where the female dominates the kitchen. No, oppressive sort of matriarch system. Having an oven, a toast, a kettle, a forehop thingy. I mean, how many things do you want? Is it 1950?

Or, Jake wants wants is some equality. A little bit of 2020 in this relationship. And he'd like to have yes, maybe just the one thing in the kitchen. And if you believe in a progressive future, if you believe that men should have the same rights as women. Reach brother! You will give Jake this one small micro! Thank you very much. Tom Rosenthal. A very compelling case there for men's rights.

And now I caught up on May Martin to begin her case for the defense. Your time starts now. Ladies and, everybody, thank you so much for having me. It's just, yeah, it is a sad day and it was hard hearing the story and I think really the issue that we have here is we have a woman who's boyfriend prefer speed over quality. And I just wondered, where does it end? Because there are some things in life best taken slow. You got to, you know, life moves very fast. And I think ultimately, she who cooks the food must decide how the food is reheated. I think that she has ownership over that domain. Also, you know, you get, let's say you're reheating a nice pie.

You put it back in the oven. You might get a nice little crisp on the top of the cheese, you know what I mean? Put it in the microwave, no way. Also dangerous radiation. I hate to mention it again, but I hate to bring everyone down, but there are risks, and also, thanks for having me. Thank you. May Mars give you one. Oh!

Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Uh, now, Jake, I'd like to be the Jake first. How do you think it's going so far? Uh. It's fine. I'd like to be the Drake first. How do you think it's going so far?

Fine. Kimberly, how are you feeling? I'm feeling very good so far. Okay, that's great. I want to go into speaking voices. So, harsh on Jake and me. Harsh, but I believe fair. So, to continue the case, and if I conclude the case for the prosecution, Tom, would you like to do it as yourself today or? No, I'm going to do the style of a deep science defence lawyer from a John Christian

novel. Oh yes. Mr. Fanshor's family. Fanshor's family, presiding and in deep providing your minutes, should you need it begins now ladies and gentlemen after jury It's a pleasure to be in the same room as you I see you there. You probably recognize me from the village Yeah, see that best in me from the bakery keep baking those onions Those onions. I don't know. I don't know.

Psst. Psst. Psst. Psst. Psst. We'll be looking over there at them, there are strange folks from the big city come down here using their big words. Technology.

Speed. Yeah. Yeah. Around here we simple folk. We small town people listen to that problem there old Jake and Kimberley they reminds me of a guy you probably remember when by the name of Corkon on the cup I'm so sorry what was his name again he was calling on the cob Clawed on the cob was that a nickname was a nickname?

He was he was a Christian call on the God was a nickname. He was he was christened Chris armor Well, we all remember the day he bought that cob You know, you probably remember on the call of the hell yeah, it's tradition. Every May day holiday time. We'd all pack up and go to the park. You probably like me, we holiday in the park every year. Bola rice. Tree. The park. They don't even know they they ain't never had a Bola rice in their parks in the big city.

Too good for him. Round here we simple folk. We know you put a Bola rice in the park and look at the tree! You'll probably remember a few years ago, calling on the cop. You looked over the fence of that park. What did he see? The skate park. He-he, you're right. Sorry to nick your line from Bridget James' diary by the way. Next to the park, a skate park.

Well, well, well. We had spent all that years so busy being in the park, looking at the bowl of rice. We'd never stopped to realize that on the other side of the fence, there was a skate park. Hands up, whoever goes to the park now on Mayday, not one of you. But hell, this Mayday I'll be seeing you in the skate park. Sometimes you need to look over the fence to realize Someone's built a scapegoat No further questions your Thank you, Fanosho

Not bad from Fanosho Not bad from Fanosho this week actually. I thought he really made a lot of sense Powerful metaphor. Yeah, really I've moved moved to tears and It's like to conclude the case for the defense Ben Well, you're minute. Yeah, yes mate. Okay. Now well listen, man. I'm with May here. I don't have a microwave. I don't even have a toaster. Oh! I live on the streets.

Oh! Please give to the Patreon. They're away to space! I'm totally with you. And also, again, like May, my mum used to say that if I would try and when I was at home, we had a microwave growing up, and I'd wait for my food and like look through the window at it. She told me that if I did that, it would boy on my eye. She also thinks a camera steals your soul as well, is that she?

She's a... She's native American, we should say that. He was your soul as well, isn't he? She's, she's, she's native American, we should say that. So you know, guys, seriously, those microwaves, they're fucked up. And they take up a lot of space, microwaves, they should call them massive waves. Oh well. It was going by last week, Clarke, so I feel like I threw you off this, like, so I blame myself. Now, obviously we've got to come to a decision here. Who's side of we on here?

And there's my time. And there's your time, exactly right. Now, who's side of we on? Is it Jake's or is it Kimberly's? Now, I can't decide myself, as I'm not so much microwaves as more micro-aggression. Can I just say that I think the so- The skate park is Chicago town pizzas. Fans you're had his chance mate. So, that's what you're trying to say. Instead, I'm going to call upon you, our Moth Club for AKAST presents brought you by dice.fm audience.

You guys know what to do. You know what to do folks, so it's like Tom and the fan sure And therefore Jake is in the right. I would like you to applaud now. That's a strong showing. That is a strong show for Jake. They're not idiots. They get the skate parking. We all got the skate park metaphor. So if you think Ben and May made the best case, I would like to applaud now. APPLAUSE It's a bit of a different... Wow.

I feel like I just heard from another louder. I mean... It's loud or in sound, sure. Oh, that was a really hard one to call and I don't think I'm gonna be popular with this result here, but that goes to Tom and Tom. Yeah! Now, my internal alarm is sounding to tell me

it's nearly the end of the show, so let's hear the quickfire jingle and hope it's not comically lengthy. This is the quickfire round. It's the round that goes really quickly Which is quite unusual because it has a long introduction It's one hell of a constant. It's a long introduction, and that produces lots of birth. The introduction's long, it normally lasts a couple of minutes. It's about the amount of time it takes to make some toast so we put some bread in And we'll know when we finish

Because the toast will be done So here's the thing, we're gonna finish this little jingle Then spread on some butter, or on some marmite for me Parkers go to have some marmolite I would prefer marmite too You don't want to enjoy me We're being sponsored by marmite I've been so much more than I've ever been. I've been so much more than I've ever been. I've been so much more than I've ever been.

I've been so much more than I've ever been. I've been so much more than I've ever been. I've been so much more than I've ever been. I've been so much more than I've ever been. I've been so much more than I've ever been. Why does it get into a world? This isn't a good hour. Oh, it's a good hour. It's a good hour. It's a good hour.

It is the quick fire. Ah! Oh, my God, I loved it. Yes, this is the no smoke without quick fire round. I'll be asking you simple trivia questions. However, as our theme is testing the smoke alarm, I'd like you to preface every answer with the names of the fireman from Trompton.

The year is 1967. LAUGHTER So, we were talking about this bit. Do you remember Trompton? I mean, obviously, don't remember it from when it was on first, because it was on, I mean, it was on in 1967. How old are you? Twenty. Twenty.

Of course they don't remember Trumpton. Yes, but you have a knowledge of history, surely. The great, the classics. The classics. We're talking bagpuss, we're talking the clangas here. They've been playing the clangas. Oh my god. So basically, there was, what's that? Were you the clangas?

You know the clangas? Yeah. So the Trumps and was like little animated wooden firemen, OK? And their names were pew, pew, binomagrew, cuff, butt, dibble, and grub. What is England? LAUGHTER

It's bizarre. We've got our country back, mate. Yeah, like it's fucking hard. Basically, Trumpton was about the most Brexit show you can imagine, was it? Everybody voted Brexit, but basically, once Trumpton happened in real life.

I've not seen the election result, but I'm waiting till I go. He goes crossed. And we got it here, can we play it? Yep, we'll play it in. So there we go, that was going... So I'd like to preface every answer with the names of the firemen from Trompton. So, if I were to ask you to complete the name of the first Harry Potter book, I want to hear Pew, Pew, Barney Magroup, Cuff, But, Dibble and the Philosopher's Stone.

That's how it works, okay? So even if you don't know the show, we can all enjoy that. Instead of buzzers... You've got a sort of Harry Potter. LAUGHTER So instead of buzzers, I like to shout out your first name. So Tom and Tom, let's hear yours. Tom! LAUGHTER

What a team! We'll talk about Synchronicity, great album by the police, by the way, no the police! You won't remember them, they were Sting's bands, Sting, I'll tell you what it feels like, okay, so instead of buzzes of course I like you to shout, your first name is May and Ben, would you hear those please? Ben, Ben, Barnaby and Grey, boss, but they're not in the real world. Okay, lovely stuff from Ben there, boss, but they don't have to be up to the chase. Lovely stuff from Ben there. The quickfire round begins now.

The movie Smoking in the Bandit starred which Mustachioed actor as the Bandit. Tom, Tom, Pew, Pew, Barley McGrady, Cuthbert Dibble and Bert Reynolds. It's correct. Which British cartoon is set in the fictional Welsh village of Pontipandy? Tom Tom P.P. Barley MacRue, Cuthbert Dibble and Fiam and Sam Correct In 1995 the band Smokey recorded the song living its daughter Alice with which Fowl mouth comedian

Tom Tom P.P. Barley MacRue, Cuthbert Dibble and Roy Chubby Brass is correct in East Enders You heard, Roy Chubby Brat. He's correct! In East Enders. You heard of Roy Chubby Brat. Especially happened. In East Enders, what was the name of the chain-smoking laundret played by June Brown? Tom. Tom. P.P. Barley Macroo, Cuthbert Diblin, dot cotton.

What were the names of the firemen in Trumpton? Ben. Ben. Buh-puh by the big group. Cuffbert Dibbel and Buh-puh by the big group. Cuffbert Dibbel and Grub. It's one point correct. In the children's song London's Burning, what was the first command given?

Oh, Buh-puh, but Tom. Tom. Buh-puh by the big group. Cuffbert Dibbel and fetch the engines. It's the correct point, yes. Oh, Pew Pew, or Tom? Tom! Pew Pew, by name of crew, Cuthbert, Dibble, and Fetch the Engines. It's the correct point, Chris! What year did the smoking ban come into effect in the UK? Tom!

Pew Pew, by name of crew, Cuthbert, Dibble, and 2007? It's correct! Who ran against Hillary Clinton in the 2016 Democratic presidential prime minister? Tom Ben. Oh. Oh.

Peter Pugh. By the way, group, Cusper Dibble and Trump. Oh, no. I'm afraid it's incorrect. The Democratic presidential primates, Tom. Uh, Pee Pugh, by the way, group, Cusper Dibble and Bernie Sanders. It's correct. I respect.

Complete the song title by Motown Legend, Smokey Robinson. The tears of what? Tom Ben. Oh. I'm going to give it to Ben, just because he hasn't had that many. I get the song title by Motown legend, Smokey Robinson, the tears of what? Time. Oh. I'm gonna give it to Ben, because he hasn't had that many. So that's how it works. It's sort of a...

Pewpew, by the way, Custard Dibble and Clown. Absolutely correct. Nay and the Stone of Comedy double act, who went... At the end. Pewpew, by the way, Custard Dibble and Cheat and Sean. I'm afraid he's incorrect.

Oh! I don't know if he. I'm afraid it's incorrect. Oh! Oh! I don't know if you... I'm not gonna dock your point. For that. LAUGHTER I'll be a dock your point for some other reason. Pew, pew, point.

I know. I know, I know, I know. Cuthbert, Dibblan, the side of the board. Exactly, yes. Sorry. No, in the Stone of Comedy, double-actually, who got the munchies and escaped from Grand Tana Mobae? May.

May. I don't know. Wait, pu-pube, pu-pube. It sounds so bad in my accent. Pube, pu-barn in the groove. Cuthbert, Dibble and Harold in Cooomba. It's correct, yes! Who's David Album featured songs such as Smokeham and Scooby Snacks?

Tom, Tom. Pube, pu-barn in the groove, Cuthbert, Dibble and the Fuddle of Incriminals. Correct. It's 1995. It's correct. It's 1995. It's out of the air. Keepin' with the 90s theme, which Scottish singer recorded, Relight My Fire, we take that.

Tom, Tom, Pew, Pew, Bollywood, Cuthbert, Diblin, Luley. It's correct, and that is our final question. That's the end of the round. That's it. I want to dedicate all my points in that round to the audience. So that is the end of the round and indeed the end of the game. So before we find out the final scores, May and Tom, have you got anything to plug? Tom you're on tour at the moment?

Yes. Tom Rosen-Tile.net. Slash dates. I'm doing a stand-up show. Which, my first date is in Hull in six days, and I sincerely hope that my vocal cords have recovered for the good people of Hull. Because this is not my pattern, did.

I don't know if any of you are familiar with any of my work, but it's very much in a high register than this. I'm worried the people are going to buy tickets and they'll be like, who's this guy? Maybe we'll just get Jake to go instead. Anyway, do that. That's what I recognise. That's the guy I gave this to. So, yes, please come and watch me. Thank you very much for having me.

Yes. Top. Top, that's lovely. May Martin. I'm going on tour as well in the new year. No, this year. And I got a sitcom coming out in March, mid March on Channel 4 and what's it called? It's called Feel Good. And it's coming out on Channel 4? Yeah, Channel 4 and Netflix. Oh, you've been rich. It's like a comedy drama, I don't know, I feel like I need to say that. And there's got some crying in it, you know, people to be pissed off.

It's Tom Rosen Tyler in it. Yeah, he says you're it. At the end of each episode, then prophecy a tissue, doesn't he? You're right. So, of course, thank you for this podcast, do come down to the live shows, you've got loads at the Phoenix coming up, so do come along to Doze. If you enjoy the podcast, leave us a review on iTunes and don't forget, if you join the Patreon every week, we put out a bonus episode of something and it goes out on Thursdays and that's for

everyone who joined the Patreon $5 through above above and thank you very much to everyone who's joined the Patreon so far you amazing. So producer Gwynn, let's hear the final schools. On my scoring sheet it's an absolute mess. Yeah, so is my mouth. Ben and May have 41. Tom and Tom have 49 and the audience have 32. Oh! I'm so sorry.

I'm so sorry folks, we cannot. We cannot give you that refund that Tom promised you, but I have heard that Harry will buy everybody here a bottle of champagne. So you're not going to go home empty handed. So unfortunately, the... Wait, did you lose? Out right. That means you guys have to test the smoke alarm.

So the audience have to test the smoke alarm whilst Tom Rose and Tarl may martin, Tom Perry and Ben Clark get to test the patients of the local residents as we get drunk a layer in the streets of Hackney. Thanks to all of our guests, it's May, it's Tom, it's Tom, it's Ben. We've been Patmy, see you next time on, Flaxhear Slam now!

CHEERING AND APPLAUSE Flaxhear Slam now takes it back. Tom it's Tom it's Ben we've been Pat me see next time on flash air slam down You've got to get everybody paid that to your audience. The most important thing for us, the most important thing for you, the listener. Thank you so much. Please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, Cheers everyone, bye! Now is the time, which is everyone by. It's the time. So don't forget to leave us a review on iTunes please. That was a really fun episode. That was a really fun episode. It was a great review. You can pop that on iTunes.

That was a really fun episode. It was great, we had a really good time recording it. I hope you had a good time listening to it. And yeah, so leave us a review on iTunes. Find us on Facebook, find us on Twitter. Go to thepatreon.com, forward slash Pappy's FlakShare and sign up or just recommend us to someone in real life. That's good, I always love it when people

recommend us on Twitter or to their friends. And it's great when someone says, I've just listened to all the episodes of Courtaub, because we've got like over 100 episodes now. Bloody hell. What a joy! Were we ever so young? We were, in 2011. What, when we saw this year 2011?

My, my, my! We were missed! It was an infinite podcast! I think we might have done. I think we've edited people forget that! We were the first ever podcast. We were the first! I certainly forget it!

Yeah! We invented it! And then Tony Blackburn. Yes. Took it to Radio Caroline. And then Pat Sharp. Then Pat Sharp did his best with it, with podcast one Lovely bit of riff in that

Anyway The godfather the podfathers the podfathers I think actually herring calls himself the podfathers So he can't have that. Yeah, I knew was podcasting before us. Yes, that's also true. Yeah So he can't have that. He was podcasting before us. Yes, that's also true. Yeah, yeah. He was, yeah. Well, think of it when you're angry.

We'll think of a new angle, don't you worry. I would say, do you know what? I think we, how about this? I think we've been podcasting for the longest without making any real inroads. Yeah, I'm saying that as fair. OK. We've been going for a lot of time bubbling under.

We've been bubbling under. These new guys come along, your snog, Mario Voids. Sure, so your Shag Mario Noid, I should call it. Shag Mario Noid. You're off menu with Ed Gambel and James A. Can you wear the A.R.? Whoever the fuck these guys are, they come along.

They're the young guys. These young bucks, these pretenders to the crown. My dad's a porn star. Alright, off you go. Great, shout about that. We'll chat about that at a separate time. Oh, sorry. I wanted to tell someone.

Exactly. Exactly. And all of these people come along and yeah, sure, they're selling out arenas. They're going on world tours. Yeah. They're getting, you know, hundreds upon thousands upon millions of downloads. Does it make them happy? Yes.

It does. It does. It makes them rich it does. It makes him rich. Yes, it does. I forgot the point I was trying to make. We're going to go away and reassess. You keep on listening. As ever, Glycer Bussade was produced by... I just asked, it's very quickly.

We're going to go away, but they've got to keep listening. That's how it works. We dip in a name. They're always there. You stay there. Stave yourself. Stay there. Stay strong.

Because it's your ear canal. Yeah, absolutely. We're not there. We're not there the whole time. Never turn your ears off, guys. Keep those ears on because otherwise we're going to be in real trubs. Okay, we're going to go away in reassess. We're going to come back next week with a real plan.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Next one, we love you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. As ever, this episode was produced by Emma Corsham. Corsham to please take a caution team. And as ever, be honest, and be fair in 2020. Be fair in 2020, guys. As ever, 20, 20.

Why hasn't it to the PO box? Oh, well, please join the Patreon. And Twitter. Has everyone. Facebook. It's time for... Cheers, everyone. Bye!

Do you want to see what the world is really like? Yes. Four things is deliciously funny and spectacularly entertaining. A woman plotting her course to freedom at in Lutton. It's non-stop bonkers brilliance. I love that. Poor things. It's a like theaters, December 15.