Pardon My Take - Caleb Williams, Hard Knocks Episode 3, Mt Rushmore Of Things That Are Hard To Explain

Episode Date: August 21, 2024

We made it on Hard Knocks and it was fucking awesome. We talk about going up to interview Caleb Williams and episode 3. In horrible news J-Lo and Ben Affleck have divorced (00:00:00-00:16:27). Hot Seat/Cool Throne including the almost Matthew Judon trade, college kids going back to school and Tua ripping Brian Flores (00:16:27-00:46:47). Mt Rushmore of things that are hard to explain (00:46:47-01:19:46). Chicago Bears QB1 Caleb Williams joins the show to talk about his first NFL training camp, winning the Heisman, re-writing Bears history, the difference between cocky and confident and tons more (01:19:46-01:50:52). We finish with guys on chicks (01:50:52-02:02:30).You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple podcast, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music on today's pardon my take. We have a very special guest. QB one of the Chicago Bears, Caleb Williams. We're up at Hallis Hall. Hard Knocks. Yeah, we're gonna talk some hard knocks. We made our hard knocks debut. Was very, very cool. Tell everyone about the experience. We have the Mount Rushmore of things that are hard to explain. We also have Hotsie Cool Throne and Guys on Chicks. Great show for everyone.

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Score big with DraftKings all college football season. Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app now. Use code TAKE. That's code TAKE for new customers. Get 200 in bonus bets when you bet just five bucks only on DraftKings. The crown is yours. Today is Wednesday, August 21st. And boys, that's the best episode of Hard Knocks I've ever seen. Hard Knocks. We made it.

That was really fucking cool. It was. It was pretty awesome. Almost didn't happen for me. I forgot to sign the release until like three hours before the actual airing of the episode. Of course. I'm bad with paperwork. That's a theme on this podcast. But yeah, it was cool.

It was kind of surreal. Myself, Big Cat, Max and memes were all on Hard Knocks. It was a pretty much the whole squad was on Hard Knocks. Yeah, had a blast doing it. And I think that they took some fair representation of what the interview is encapsulated into hard knocks. Yeah, so it was it was very cool. We always we had our interview planned with Caleb Williams last Tuesday. And we

went up to Hallis Hall. And we're like, maybe there's a chance like we get seen in the background at hard knocks. Turns out the majority of the hard knocks film crew is fans of ours and we're fans of them. And like they were the coolest dudes ever. Like, hey, do you mind if we like punch into your sound? And then so they listened to the whole interview. Is that right? What did I say? What did I say wrong? That was good. They patch patched it. I love hearing you talk shop. Yeah. I'm sorry you didn't get on hardnights. What they didn't do, which I was just going about. You rang a bell. You were in Missoula's fucking thing.

And Hank thought that there was a possibility this could happen. Before the interview, we were waiting in this room for Caleb to shower or get ready after practice. We were waiting in another room. Yeah. We weren't waiting in the room where Caleb was showering. We were waiting in a different room while Caleb was showering. Yes, Caleb was showering in a bathroom. Yes, we were in the interview room.

Yes, that did not have running water. Correct. And so we're waiting there and we got into big just I want to say debate, but it was really just Hank versus the world. You know, like it's just a regular day. You know, you know, like in the Roman Empire, when they would like tie up a bear to a steak and then have a bunch of wolves just stand around it and try to kill it. That's what we're doing to Hank for about 20 minutes. And Hank thought that they might use some of this. This just bank baiting. It was that was when we knew the guys like liked us and knew us because they were chuckling in the background. And I was like, you see, like, we just never turn off the podcast. We're just doing it right now. Well, Hank was in a mood too. Yeah. So he wasn't in a mood, but it was a great mood. It was really cool. Yeah, I said a mood. I didn't say what kind

of mood. So they patched into our sound. Yeah, they punched in. They punched into our sound. So we were like, this is awesome. Maybe they'll use a clip. Cool. And then like maybe a day later, I got a text from someone at Hard Knocks and they're like, Hey, can we get all your footage? I was like, Yeah, no problem. And at that point, I was like, boys, I think we're going to be in Hard Knocks. Yeah. And then they they sent us the edit. What is Sunday? And we watched

it. And we're like, well, this is the coolest thing ever. So yeah, the show that we've been watching for 20 years. We all made it. Yeah. And Caleb was a cool guy, confident guy. I like talking to him. I think the way that he came across or the way that he's coming across on Hard Knocks is also what we saw in person. Seemed like a good dude. He would have pressed the button. He would have killed somebody. He was pressing the button. He was smashing that kill bear's fan button on his leg. And I would imagine just from the replies that I got on Twitter tonight, there are probably thousands of bears. Everyone was saying that that would willingly die for 10 bears.

Super Bowl. If you got the credit for it for sure. Yeah. Yeah. Get the statue. It was besides us were not such narcissists that that was the only hard knocks recap. I mean, I obviously not think we're good. I loved I loved the episodeists that that was the only hard knocks recap. I mean, I obviously know I think we're good. I loved I loved the episode just because it was the hype is at an all time high. I understand that it was the Bengal second defense. I understand that. But I'm going to I'm going to ride the hype wave the way they edited it the way they ended

it. What do you what do you do? We got a text while you're talking big cat. It was from Max Max is now putting into the show via text He says Hank take your hand out of your pocket. It looks like you're jerking off It did I looked over I did look like camera. It doesn't look good It did I I did that off air because I thought it would do it I didn't want to blow up a spot on the show We couldn't tell Max because you touch your balls all the time. That's true. That's true. That's welcome to any new listeners. Pardon my take. We get that actually Hank does this every episode. He jerks off at some point. You got

to figure out when, uh, usually during the lighthouse segment. Yeah. So, uh, yeah, no, it was an awesome episode. I mean, they were, I feel like they finally like started hammering in on different players. That was really cool. Like Tory Taylor. Yeah. He looks like chef Donnie. He's a weapon. He, uh, he doesn't like the nickname, the crocodile hunter, which that was the classic like media thing. Yeah. Oh, there's an Australian guy. Let's ask him if his nickname is the only Australian person that we know. And he was like, no, I don't know. Like call me literally anything but that. Yeah. I actually thought he looked like Brogan Roback and I thought that his nickname should be Bogan Roback. Oh, I like that.

He looks like Chef Donnie too. Yeah, our chef. He does. Um and then we had Tyson Bajant was great. His dad is a world class arm wrestler. Well, not world like he is universe class. Yeah, the best in the history of left handed arm wrestling. Yeah, he's he's the best Austin Booker, the ferret king. Uh no, the different guy. best. Austin Booker, the ferret King. No, the different guy. Oh, no. Who was so the ferret King? Is it Vellis or Vellis Jones? I don't think Vellis Jones is the ferret. I thought he was the ferret King.

Yeah. Oh, he might have been. I think he's a ferret King, which is it's a red flag for me that he's a ferret guy. Yeah. And he may have murdered his ferret. Oh, yeah. Was Vellis Jones. What was awesome awesome booker? He had a nickname to Austin Booker. I don't know I Had like he was just doing in nicknames forever his nickname Austin Reed Austin Reed. Yeah, that's probably it. They're very similar Yeah, just switch names. Yeah, the awesome read had a nice moment singing to everyone. Yeah, that was a lot of fun Keisha Cole. Yeah, And then we also had a pretty cool situation where we learned about the judon trade, which we actually are going to

talk about in hot sea cool. We pretty much covered it. I had some nice spin zones. But it was good. I'll say this. I wish I had seen the episode before we talked about hot sea cool throne. Hank, did you watch that part? Ryan Pohl's has guard rails. And he doesn't wanna go too far into the guard rails. I saw the one, I saw Eberflu's talking to the guy on the sidelines. He was like, you think it's gonna happen? They're like, yeah.

Yeah, it's like if you're driving your car and you're like, you think we're gonna crash? Oh no, the guard rail's there. I love it because Big Cat was prepping for Hank to come at him and the line of defense he had set up was just guard rails. Guard rails. Just hammer the guard of defense he had set up was just guardrails. Guardrails. He said that.

He said that. You're like, should we drive straight? And they say yes. No, no, no, no, no. Drive straight in the guardrails? You're going to crash, which would have been trading for Matthew Judon. It would have been, we would have totaled our car. Instead, the guardrail saved us.

Like Hank, if there was a guardrail. The guardrails being in the guardrails, there's Matthew Judon saying no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. It was the guardrails. Hank doesn't understand. If there was a guardrail around that telephone pole in the guard rails are just Matthew Judon saying no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. It was the guard rails. Hank doesn't understand. If there was a guard rail around that telephone pole in the parking lot, my car would be fine. Yeah. I don't think you understand what a guard rail is. We're going to do the Mount Rushworth things that are hard to explain. It's a guard rail. And so, yeah, so like I just saw the clip where they're like, yeah, we really, we're going for

him. We're going to get him. He was like, oh, we're going to get him. And they're like, yep. But that right after that moment, which you probably didn't see you watch the episode he hit into the guardrail got it yeah yeah there's a full room in there I was really I was gonna squeeze in he had a binder ready poles had a binder he was just ringing off fake stuff I was set he was like like, no, no, no, no, no. There's like, yeah, he's 50th and, uh, And wins. And wins at it. He was just, even. Does he have that stats for every NFL player?

Like, could you tell me like via, like a punter, how many wins added you get with a punter? That, that scene was, uh, I think Kevin Warren put it in the Hard Knocks contract that he has to be in at least three scenes an episode. Oh, well, let's not downplay the scene where he was talking about the different chairs that you can get the sweeps.

That was, that was riveting television. They're designing sweets for their stadium that doesn't exist. Yeah. And Kevin Warren's making he's making executive choices about whether or not you want a high top chair with a back. If you want people like sitting up, if you want people standing, if you want an Adirondack chair, like that's what you pay a guy like he's president of the team. Right? Right. These are the decisions that a president has to make. Listen, I'll, I'll squash my beef with Kevin Warren for canceling the big 10 football season. Uh, when COVID happened, if he gets the bears a new stadium, but that was, I, I assume Ryan polls when he has to do these scenes where he just like,

I can just say any stat. Yeah, it will be good. Yeah. 50th in a added wins for a defensive end. Montez was 19th last season. Oh, I see right here. He's 32. Looks like we hit a guardrail. That's one of the guardrails we talked about earlier. Oh, he's from Louisiana. Probably he'd probably wants to go to Atlanta.

Listen, listen, don't spoil the Hot Seat Cool drone spin zones that I had. Cooked up some good ones. I had a question for you. After the game, they gave Caleb Williams the ball from his first touchdown pass. Yeah. Was it from his run, his touchdown run? Is that the first time that you think football has been put into an alligator purse?

Yeah, that wasn't his purse. I think that was his carry all his purse was next to the carry all. Yeah. Is that the first time? Please, is that the first time that I learn men's fashion? A football has been put into an alligator carry. No, definitely not. Dude's been rocking an alligator forever.

Yeah. Are you serious? I don't know. We're asking the question. Yeah, that's a common. The purse next to the carry-all, if you put it in there, maybe you'd have an argument. The carry-all is, guys walk in.

Think about the tunnel walk. Like ESPN countdown. How many? They're all wearing. They all have the carry. It's all Gator. A lot of them. I got to get into some Gator.

Yeah. I mean, we're going to get into a kill. I'm probably going to buy whatever that European handbag he has is. The Gator one. No, I'm going to get the carry all. That's a carry all. I'm also going to get the hand.

I thought it was a matching set. I'm also going to get the handbag. No. I'm gonna get the carry all. That's carry all. I'm also I thought it was a matching set. I'm also gonna get the handbag. No, I don't think they're matching sets. Good episode, though. Yeah, I liked it. I liked it a lot. It's so funny. The Matthew Judon trade was like a five minute segment after we taped. We the Wi Fi is not great here. So we're trying to get the upload as fast as possible so people can listen. And so we taped a lot of the show earlier today.

And we had an extended spin zone for me about where places are in America. Yeah. Only other thing I had before we get to hot sea cool throne is Are you guys sitting down? Yeah. JLo and Ben Affleck are broken up. Really? I never could have seen this coming. Do you think maybe the band's getting back together? I don't know. A-Rod?

If I know A-Rod, he's not going to call first. This has A-Rod's soft fingerprints all over it. Listen, if we see JLo at some minutes, she is a Timberwolves fan. Yeah. Die hard. So wouldn't shock me. But yeah, isn't it?

I mean, you guys thought they were going to be together forever. I did. But you know what? This is a good opportunity. I honestly didn't realize I got married again. I thought they had gotten divorced. They just started like dating again. It's a good opportunity for us because you know, we can't date Taylor Swift. She's off the market. But maybe you could slide into JLo's D. Yeah, I've been to multiple of her houses before.

Multiple of her houses, how about that? You've been in her back doors a couple times. We have been to multiple of her houses. That's weird, and she smelled nice in all of them. Yeah, and she hate, she only hate you. I don't think they let me walk inside the one in the Hamptons, they were just like, showed me around. Oh, we never went inside, yeah.

They just showed me around to the backyard. The LA one. She's got a great backyard. The LA one,. She I've never seen someone more angry to see two guys in someone's house like that weren't. Outside of someone robbing, actually,

I think she would have been less angry if it was robbers because she'd been like, I'll just call the police. She saw us in her face immediately dropped and she's like, these fucking guys are in my blog. Boys are here again. Yeah, that was bad.

Hank, between you and JLo, you'd have a perfectly normal size ass. Yeah. Yeah. Dude, Hank, you should. Just slide. Just reach out. Hank, send her DM. Okay. Send her DM right now. I wanna see it.

Just be like, heard you got divorced. Hey, remember me? Yeah, heard you got divorced. I was the guy that was in your backyard. Oh, wait. No, no, no. Just just write. So divorce question mark. Oh, no. Hank, do do so dot dot dot. Yeah. Divorce question mark. Look, here's a picture from her former backyard. Oh, yeah, that is. Oh, let me see a picture. Really nice backyard. Oh, yeah, that is. Let me see a picture. Really nice backyard. Yeah, it's really nice.

What did you send her? What did you send her? I said, so dot dot dot. Divorce, question mark? No, you follow up with a divorce. Yeah, I'll wait till tomorrow. I'll send her the exclamation point on that. Be like, you must have missed this.

I heard you like guys from Boston. Well, no, that's a bad time for that. And she's also, yeah, she's going back to A-Rod. That's true. Yeah. So we're good. But yeah, shocking news in the love world, which we cover extensively. It's tough. Also, there was a fire at the Cowboys Hotel today. Oh, yeah. So everyone's safe. Who started it? If I had to guess, I would probably say Jerry. This might be a Vesuvio's thing. He needs money. He's got to pay DAC and CD.

You might trade CD. Yeah, you're right. I'm surprised. You're still a camp. I feel like camp ended. Camp broke for a lot of people. Yeah. Yeah, because they just announced like a lot of these preseason

games. No one started. Honestly, if we're being real, if Michael Irvin was around. Yeah, that was his fire. That's my guess. That was his fire for sure. OK, we got a great rest of the show. So we'll kick it to ourselves with Hot Seat Cool Throne,

Mount Rushmore of Things That Are Hard to Explain, and Caleb Williams. Before we get to Hot Seat Cool Throne, game time football season is here. And we can't wait to get out some games this fall. With the help of Game Time, the official ticketing partner Barstool Sports. You know how much we love Game Time. Now with their brand new Game Time picks feature, they're making it even easier to get to a game. Game Time picks filter filters out the fluff to show you only incredible deals on great seats so you don't have to waste time searching through thousands of tickets. Hank, give us, the football is so close to being back,

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Oh, it's not the lions though. It's the Ravens and the chiefs. Oh, okay. But we should send spring since we should send sprinkles. We should send sprinkles. The funniest part about that, it was after about a 20 minute pause that we took to get the microphone set up. Nailed that line. And Hank was like, OK, do the line. I was like, ah, fuck it, send sprinkles.

All right, so go to the Game Time app right now. Download the game. We should send sprinkles anyway. Yeah, we should. Download the Game Time app today and use code PMT to easily score. Great deals, new Game Time picks. What time is it game time? Hot Seat Cool Throne is brought to you by our friends at Coors Light. You know it is the coldest beer out there. Fans of even the biggest rivals agree on one thing, the mountain cold refreshment of Coors Light. When rivalries start to heat up

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beer out there. Oh, nothing better than a Coors Light in the fall tailgate at the big game. It's the best beer in the fall tailgate at the big game. It's the best beer in the world. All right, Hot Seat Cool Throne, Hank. My hot seat is the Chicago Bears. Why? We talked about the Matthew Judon trade and basically it worked out for the Patriots,

the Bears and the Falcons had very similar offers. So the Patriots gave Matthew Judon the option of which team he wanted to go to and he chose the Falcons. I mean, he's from Louisiana, I think. So not too far from Atlanta. Yeah. They, they love the Falcons in Louisiana. Yeah. They love them. I, I, I'm honestly happy that we didn't trade. Uh, yeah, I think Ryan Poles has got it set up perfectly. They wanted to see,

well they offered. Yeah. You haven't made the offer. With doing that. It well they offered. Yeah, you made the offer Doing that it's not what you know, but I sounds like the Bears drove up the price for the Falcon. Yeah exactly No, it's the same. We do no no no no they have two offers drove it up. No is he drove they drove it up They drove it up because the Falcons had to match so you've trying it so the guy that you said was definitely gonna be still on the Patriots You're now saying is a loss for the Bears. I think if it gets presented in the way it got presented, where it's like a player had the choice, like not the not. I saw this tweet. It was there's not the Falcons.

It's a couple of days ago. Yeah, it was a week old. Let me see. Albert Brears tweet was was really the mean one. And I didn't even think it was fair. But wait, Hank, I thought you were saying that it's OK to lose Matthew Judon because he's getting older. Two days ago. Albert, yeah. Should I thought you were saying that it's OK to lose Matthew Judon because he's getting older. Two days ago, Albert Breer said... Shouldn't I be happy that he's not on the Bears?

That was a good point. He doesn't really fit with Iberfluis's scheme either. Albert Breer said, New England believing the Bears and Falcons were in similar category and with third round offers from both gave linebacker Judon his choice of being dealt to Atlanta or Chicago. And then Breer said Judon obviously picked Atlanta. Obviously. Well, obviously, because that's probably where he ended up. And he Breer said, Judon obviously picked at least obviously, but obviously, that was probably where he ended up. He's got more chance to play. Yeah, starter

from Louisiana. I so deep. I think the obviously part came from the fact that he is indeed a Falcon. So obviously he did pick the Falcons. Also not fitting into Matty Buflus's scheme. That that's a very good thing. Historically, Matty was good defensive coordinator. I mean, just as a head coach. Yeah, but he's good. He turned that defense around when our defensive coordinator left for various reasons. Was it various reasons? Various reasons. Yeah, Matthew Judon. He's from Louisiana close to Atlanta and

he went to high school in Michigan. Probably hates the Bears because he liked the Lions. That makes sense. Yeah, actually, if you do Detroit in Baton Rouge, Atlanta's probably right in the middle. Also, net positive for the Bears because he wears the long sleeve sweatshirt. That's not a tough Chicago bear weather guy. Listen, we're not in full win now mode. We're in win. We wanted to be wanted him.

I knew it was find me a tweet where I said I wanted to know the Bears. I'm saying you like I think Ryan Paul's just he's just you know, he's wheeling and dealing. He's out in the business. You got at least call. I would say the wind now when they offer is open. Yeah, bears.

Yeah, when now when window might be open I thought it's open. Yes, we gotta go she's in games. You got a little draft coming. Yeah Then my cool throws back just trying to yuck my yum. No, I just you know It was a it was a topic of conversation on this show. This is Hank is interesting follow-up That's a relevant follow. Hank is in the depths because he actually I saw him off-camera the other day admit that the Patriots are gonna Be terrible this year. He's trying to drag us down. That's just I mean if we're doing admit admit tations off camera, that's a slippery slope but

Oh, what I meant? No, I'm not I'm not gonna stoop to that level. What would I admit? What's going on? Hank? What's on your mind? I'm not gonna suit that level. My cool throw is back. You're obviously I where do I begin? I mean, I got a laundry list of things. There's a code. There's a code. I mean, saying that you think the Patriots are bad. That's a bad. That's a code that I broke. I didn't say it. I think they're bad. I just think they're going to be bad. A lot of games. Yeah. Statistically. Yeah. My cool throws backyard baseball. Okay. Oh, yeah. It's back. It's back. Yeah. They released

a video. Someone found that they started an Instagram a couple weeks ago and someone uncovered the Instagram which Is one of the crazier like that's just a weird internet thing where like someone's like I found this backyard baseball Instagram account It has 200 followers, but it follows like uh, like how do you find that that seems like it was planted? Maybe because then it came back this week. Did we talk to them? Yeah, we did. What, I was not supposed to head off screen? I don't know. I'm pretty sure they came into the office because we were talking about maybe making a level.

I got our office. I got a text about that from somebody and I passed it along. Yeah. I don't know if it followed up. Is this a bad admit offline? No, this is your thing now. Well, I'm asking a question. We a bad ad, but offline. No, you're this is your thing now. Well, I'm asking you a question. We did. Yeah, that happened.

It didn't happen publicly. Yeah, we have. I'm going to have sorry for what I said. Admit, chat, set, strike that admit from the I mean, it would have been sick. It would have been sick. I'm still what happened. Yes, I have. This actually makes it probably better chance.

I've been in it. I have an on camera admission. OK, I've never played backyard baseball. I also have never it seems like it's on it because we're a little older This is this stinks for you guys I'm not knocking. I would love to play it Pablo Sanchez. When did it come out like in the night in the time? I don't know. Was it Kenny? Can you like 99? I? Like in the 90s. I don't think so. Kenny, Kenny Tamaguchi? At least like 99. I don't know.

Because like the players were definitely your era of players. Pablo, yeah. 1997. Yeah. I'm sorry, I missed it. How old are you? This is bad. Here's the thing.

My family, we were always like two generations behind the most current game system. So it would take me a good like eight years to catch up to whatever was possible. Sunny day downfield else. I really want to message you down on the team. Kenny Cowan. That's what it was. That's like that. Vicky cowagoo. She was trash topic. I got, I got my feet. He's hurt the other day because there was one of those. Yeah, there was a Twitter poll out there that said, uh, which quarterback would you rather have retweet for Jaden Daniels? Hart for Drake May.

And of course, Drake may want that dirty. That's what I don't like. I don't like that. That's election interference. When you do that, you could do it. You could put up a poll that said which cast member part of my take is taller. Retweet for Big Cat, Hart for PFT. And I would win that. Maybe not. Maybe.

Maybe we should do a social experiment on that one. Because I feel like those poles are skewed. They're skewed and I don't like them. They are skewed, they are skewed. Yeah, I'm excited for backyard baseball. Backyard football also elite. It was a computer game? So maybe I did play it a little bit.

No, no, you're not allowed to talk., no, you're not allowed to know if you would know if you would know if you got to control their power and speed. I'm not saying I ever played it to like I never played it, but I've like I have played one time. Maybe Kenny Kawaguchi because I forgot his computer. So it was all I did not on a gaming system. It was a computer game. MS DOS. Yes. Yes. CD-ROM starting to come back to me, but I did not play it. I'm not saying I played it. I'm saying I'm I was aware of it more than I

realized. That would be good Mount Rushmore to is Mount Rushmore of computer games. Yeah, not not video games nude one one. I love doom. Power Pete. I think backyard baseball would do one boomer doom doom and quake. Chaka Chaka. I used to play Matt I just felt like MVP baseball on computer. But I just that was my nose and 64 Ken Griffey baseball was my jam. The free pinball on Yeah, I hate free pinballs. I've never been a pinball. No, no, in general, I hate but the space pinball on the computer was a puts like 18 hours of pinball in our office when Hank complains about coming to when he takes a vacation

He's actually mostly taking vacation for the head ball Yeah, it's basically it just trades off he and spider and whoever whoever has the record You just can just take the other person and scratch off their entire week knowing that that's all they're gonna try to do There's times where Hanks like alright. I'm heading home. See you guys later, and then like off their entire week knowing that that's all they're gonna try to do. There's times where Hank's like, all right, I'm heading home, see you guys later. And then like three hours later, you walk over into the kitchen. It's like, what dude, you're still here? It's the ultimate, because it's free.

It's like, it's an ultimate like one more game. And then it's like, ah, ah, ah. Did you know pinball used to be like a badass thing to do back in the day in like the 60s, 70s? Dads would be like, don't date that boy. He plays pinball pinball. It's one game. Addicting. Probably why it's like addictive personality syndrome.

Good hot seat, cool throne. Thanks. Yeah. You and spider two real rebels of the office. My hot seat is that guy center, the tennis player. Center steroids. Oh, so center just won at Indian Wells, I think last week, he beat Tiafoe.

And a report just came out today, he tested positive not once, but twice, for a banned substance. The tennis community, this was like months ago, they found out about it, they gave him a slap on the wrist, and they accepted his explanation of how he got the steroids in his system. And the explanation is his trainer was performing like, I don't know, you get calluses on your feet during a tournament or something. And his trainer said that he had a scalpel to cut off

part of the calluses, accidentally sliced his thumb and then used like one of those new skin type sprays on his cut to heal it up. And then later on in the day, gave center a full body massage. And that's how the chemical got onto center's body. OK, so two things. One, his name is center. Yeah. OK, so hate to send. Yeah. Love the center to. I think I defend him because if you come up with such a bullshit excuse the first time and they buy it, why wouldn't you keep doing it? Being like, they'll just come up with such a bullshit excuse the first time and they buy it, why

wouldn't you keep doing it being like they'll just come up with this? They'll accept any way. It was the same excuse. He tested positive twice for it, but he said that again. That's how he got it. Yeah, again, I think I think I have his back because like that's on the tennis community. What's the Federation? So I actually saw this. They have a ridiculous name. I'm trying to look it up right now. It's called like the Federation for Fairness in Tennis. But you see what I'm saying? Like if you if you use such a ridiculous excuse the first time

and they buy it, what is the disincentive to not keep using that excuse? There's none. Right. So I would just keep doing it. Like it makes no sense. RFK is going to keep collecting bear cubs in his car because he didn't get in trouble the first

time. That's just a fact. He got away with it. He's going to be a serial massager. Right. So, yeah, he said that it came from a spray used on his trainer's hand and then his trainer put the chemical on his body via a full body massage. And then he tested positive.

And then he tested positive. Got it. Yeah. But then this is the. And then he tested positive. Got it. Yeah. But this is... The other tennis players are pissed. This is essentially like, no, honey, the glitter on me is not from the strip club. I actually went to a sprinkles party. I was going home and there was a huge stop in traffic and there was a three year old's

birthday party happening and I got sprinkle bombs. I actually stopped by Michael's craft store to pick up some things for the house because I know you like decorating. Right. And if she buys that, then you're going to keep doing that. Yeah. So center said, I will now put this challenging and deeply unfortunate period behind me. I will continue to do everything I can to ensure that I comply with the ITIA's anti-doping

program. It's called the International Tennis Integrity Agency. If an agency is named like that explicitly cornyly, cornyly. Cornily, yeah. It's no, there's no better mark that that agency is completely full of shit. Yes, agreed.

If you have to add more, the word salad agencies are always the most full of shit agencies in the world. Yeah. Uh, okay. Good. Hotsy is the same drug that, uh, Fernando Tatis got suspended for. Did he also get a massage? I'm sure he did. Yeah. I'm sure he, he's always hurt. So probably. Uh, so my cool throne is going to be Kirk Cousins, Kirk Cousins on the playlist.

He got the ox cord the other day. It was his birthday. So they let him choose the, him choose the workout playlist at practice. I'm just going to run through it because when I saw that it was a Kirk Cousins playlist, I thought that there would be a lot of Nickelback. I thought there'd be some Creed, some Coldplay, maybe some DC talk or jars of clay if you want to dip into the spiritual side. But his playlist is The Middle by Jimmy Eat World. Move-hmm move along by the all-american rejects There's green day Stacey's mom fountains of Wayne. Maybe got a little little New York Jets quarterback in him former jet current Bronco All the small things by blink 182 the anthem by good Charlotte. Mr. Brightside It sounds like an awesome play the best of you by the Foo Fighters another good Charlotte song. Lifestyles of Rich and Famous. Dirty little secrets. Sugar were going down. Somebody told me by the killers. Dear Maria, count me in by all time low. This guy has good taste in music now. Or maybe, maybe we're just washed. No. Yes, we are. Yeah. Why not? True. Can I?

I was going to say why not both? Because you and I are. Good point. Yeah. Yeah. Listen, this you don't have to see 31 is that much. It's not washing. This is 31 is a spring chicken. This is a great playlist.

Yeah, it is like her cousin surprise. I saw it and I wanted to roast it like all these songs rock. This is good. It's actually 90 percent of a pop punk playlist. Yeah, it is like Kirk Cousins surprise. I saw it and I wanted to roast it. Like all these songs rock. This is good. It's actually 90% of a pop punk playlist. Yeah, this is that these are actually this is our setlist. Kirk Cousins singing a pop punk song on stage would be awesome. You might just have to start doing shows in Atlanta. Yeah, if you do it, like if you build it, they will come. Yeah, just just just a

residency in Atlanta. Kirk, listen, anytime you want, you can get on stage, sing a song with us. You don't have to sing the F word parts. Yeah, we'll bleep those out. We will. OK, my hot seat is us. This is a theme now. We're just talking about washing. Actually, Hank, you might be in this. Max, you might be in this, too.

I was thinking so we have a great life. We have a great job. Everything is awesome. But there are definitely certain times when you're like, man, I missed that. And every year, no matter what, it's these last two weeks of August when I see kids going back to college. I'm like, fuck, that was, that's it.

So I wanna just give a PSA to anyone listening to this right now who went back to college or maybe starting college. It is the fastest four years of your life. So just embrace it and and like close your eyes and live in the moment. But I don't know something about these like like college football starting next week, those first few games on campus when it's hot and everyone's partying and everyone like the first September is such a joke in college. You don't go to your classes. You don't have to worry about anything.

Midterms feel like so long away. Yeah, we it was constant welcome week where it was just an entire week where everyone went back just to rage. I I yeah, I miss it. It is a very, very good week. And it's funny because when you're when you're in college, you take summers off and then you go home, you party with all your friends from your hometown and then when you go back to school You don't have that downside of god damn it. I have to go back to school you have oh, yeah

I get to go hang out with all my friends from college, right? And and it's a great week and yeah, I do I do miss that too. It is because there's a lot of things about college I do not miss and like, you know, living in in squalor. I kind of miss that every now and then I. I talked to you, I told you guys, my wife was out of town last week. I kind of went back to that. I was like, I don't think this is for me anymore. But yeah, there's every now and then I'm just like, man, I miss that welcome week. You know what I'm talking about, Hank? I kind of miss the idea of just having an apartment where I would not care if everything in

there got lost in fire. I've lived in squalor for sure. Just not at college. Breaking shit. Yeah. Putting holes in the wall. That's artwork now. I threw a backwards pass. I lived in the same apartment for two years in Madison. Didn't somehow didn't really break a lot of stuff. Like, you know, wear and tear. Last day before we moved out, I threw a behind the back pass beer can right through the window. That rocks. So awesome.

I mean, it's too late to fix it. And I had no money and it was like 300 bucks to fix. Yes. This fucking sucks. Yeah. Forget about that glass pane. It was, I think I was living with the beeve at one point and we had so much trash in the kitchen and our landlord

came over he was like you guys got to get rid of all this trash and I was like okay be careful what you wish for. And so I took it out on the porch and we had it was you know like one of those second story apartments so you had like a little deck area that was maybe you know the size of I don't know just like a large closet and then you had a deck above you and a deck below you. I took all that trash out there we gathered it and then we had a large closet. And then you had a deck above you and a deck below you. I took all that trash out there. We gathered it and then we had a controlled burn. We just lit it on fire. And then the landlord came by later and he was like, you can't be lighting fires. I said, told us. I said, okay, dad, you told me to take the trash out. Not our

fault. Not our fault. Okay. My cool throne is so yeah, just embrace college. If you're going to college, you're going back to college, you're starting college fucking embrace it because the beginning the first few weeks when it's just beautiful weather and you don't have to go to class is just there's something special. All right, my cool throne. I have two one is for Aaron Rodgers because when we had Aaron Rodgers on for chill week, he told us make football hard again. That was one of the things he wanted. And he said that the camp, the Jets camp this year is much harder and maybe the hardest in the last seven

or eight years of his career. And he said that Robert Salah is like really cracking the whip and the boys are hitting hard and it's tough and it's making football hard. So good job, Aaron Rogers made football hard again. Good job, Aaron Rodgers made football hard. Good job, Aaron Rodgers. And it sounds like everybody on the Jets is there. Yeah. Right. Assan Reddick.

Update memes. Memes is Assan Reddick not hard. I means the season is about to start. He'll come. He'll come. He's got to start. He'll come. He'll come. He's got to be hard before he comes. He's going to come. No, he's going to come. He'll get hard. He'll come. You sure he's going to come?

Positive. He's going to come. Okay. Well, so he has not come yet, right? And he owes what, like $3 million? That's an expensive come. What will you do if he doesn't come? We just wait for him. But Matthew Jude on is helping him come. He said today he that he wants to show off for the Falcons so we get he could earn his contract. So how does that have anything to do with the song? Oh, it's on reddit just needs to show up and I'll get

that contract. So you think it's on reddit saw Matthew Jude on said that and said, you know what? He's right. Well, it doesn't help his case. What? Hassan Reddick, because he hasn't showed up. Well, Hassan Reddick is watching another man come for the Falcons, and he's not coming yet. Also, Hassan Reddick is three years younger than Matthew. Matthew John knows that this is his last chance at a contract.

Could be Hassan sons, too. OK, I guess. Yeah. Yeah. Right. 29 could be his last big one. Kyle Shanahan taught us we might die tomorrow. Yeah. Means I don't think you're going to get him to come. I think I think we will. I really don't think you're going to get him to come. I don't even think he's hard.

He hasn't been a camp. He can't get. Yeah. You have to be at camp to get hard. Right. So he's not. He's he's soft as could be right now. And you're telling me he's going to come. I think he's going to come. No, you got to walk before you're not. Oh, all right. My other cool throne is to to is on my cool throne. Yeah, because he went on Levitard show and basically said that Brian

Flores was doing mental torture on him. And he said, if you woke up every morning and I told you that you suck at what you did, that you don't belong, that you don't belong doing what you do, you shouldn't be here, that this guy should be here, that you haven't earned this right. And then you have somebody else come in and tell you, dude, you're the best fit for this. He said, how would it make you feel listening to one or the other? Talking about Brian Flores, basically shitting on to every single day. And so normally I saw that clip. I was like, yeah, that sucks. But who knows?

Like two might be exaggerate. Brian Flores actually came out and said, like, I've evolved. And yeah, I kind of fucked that up. Yeah. Also, I think toua said he was a terrible person. Yeah. You don't really hear quarterbacks say it that much. It sounds like Tua is to Brian Flores as Big Cat is to the chat. What do you mean? Like the chat is your Brian. Oh, yes. Yeah. They every time I log on for the streams, for the Doug streams,

they're like, you're terrible at what you do. You shouldn't be here. Someone else should be here. You suck. I hate you. Yeah. Sliders, cheat code, glitch play. You just need more positive energy. Learn more plays. Learn more plays. Oh, yeah. Four played playbook. You're never going to win the big one. You're a piece of shit. No composure. No composure. You're fat. We hate you. We hope you die. This does give me pre-recorded. We hope you die. This does give me a pre-recorded. Pre-recorded.

This does give more credence to our theory though that former New England Patriots coaches, they go places, they become head coaches, and then they absolutely tank those teams so that the Patriots would have an easier walk through their division. It sounds like if you were to tell me that Brian Flores was sent on a mission to the Miami Dolphins to destroy the team and destroy their new quarterback, it sounds like that's exactly what he was doing. Flores admitted it was true. So two is not wrong. But his last two seasons with the Dolphins, they won 19 games. Mike McDaniel's first two seasons with the like the worst coach in the world. Like he was getting semi results. I know they missed the playoffs.

Let's say that's but let's look back at Brian Flores tenure as Miami Dolphins. He destroyed the confidence of their young quarterback. He sued the team and he narked on the team. I think he won some games. It's also just as simple as everyone would leave Belichick's coaching tree and try to be Bill Belichick. And turns out when you tell someone you suck, you don't know what you're doing, your piece of shit. It's something that you can listen to when the person has six rings and when they don't, they're just an asshole. Or it's

easier for you to accept that criticism if you're already good. Yeah. If you're Tom Brady and you have a guy that's telling you like always on your case, I'm sure that sucks a lot. Yeah, but it's probably easier to digest that than it would be if you're a first year quarterback and your coach is just destroying your confidence before you have an opportunity to get in. Yeah, it's it's carrot in the stick. There you know, there's a carrot at the end and someone says, oh,

they're hitting you with the stick. It's like, well, I'm going to get the carrot. Actually, we got we have to change. We got to change that entire analogy, too, because who gives a fuck about a carrot? If you're getting hit by a stick,

I'd rather have the carrot. If you were to say like Cool Ranch Doritos. Yeah, did a rabbit write that? Yeah, that makes no sense. It should be Coors Light and Stig. Yeah, Mountain Dew and a stick. Yeah, that a rabbit write that? Yeah. That makes no sense. It should be Coors Light and Stig. Yeah. Mountain Dew and a stick.

Yeah, that's what I said. That would get me out. That would get me to get off my ass. Mountain Dew. Shout out Mountain Dew. Best. OK, Huey, you're up. My hot seat. I got a question. Yeah. When you do who's back, someone mentioned this. for you, Huey. Yeah.

When you do who's back, someone mentioned this, do you say Huey's back? No, I think people want me to start saying Huey's back. Okay, nice. Yeah, I got a couple DMs from that. They're like, you should do Huey's back. Oh, I thought you might've even said it. It was kind of like the dress, you know,

is it whatever, green or gold? Yeah, I remember that. Whatever is black or gold? My, Mahati Godster children, children. Oh yeah. Um, so as a former lion, first round pick, um, he, uh, at one in the morning, took a flight, took a, apparently in his apology, took a couple of sleeping medications. He is not familiar with. Okay. And he peed on a woman on a flight on a plane. Yes. On a plane. Godster Godster children.

Children. He's a big like a guy. Churlis. Churlis. Yeah. He's like six, five, six, six. He was a tackle. I mean, big, big son of a bitch peeing on you. Peeing on a flight at 1 a.m. flight. Yeah, it was. Yeah. I mean, those if you do take sleepinging on you. On a flight. 1 a.m. flight. Yeah. It was a, yeah.

I mean those, if you do take sleeping pills, you can have crazy things. Yeah. Crazy things can happen too on a flight. Yes. Absolutely. Saying things. Hank, would you like to see a picture of God, sir?

See if it's your speed. Okay. Just seeing. Not into that stuff. I do love every time. Sure, you're into planes. When somebody goes viral for anything that happens on a plane, just the first response is, Hank, are you going to date him?

You just started dating Godster Childress. OK. My cool throne. A man by the name of D. Oh, boy. Why do you pick the hardest names? Well, also, isn't it Charilus? I don't think there's a D in the last name. We're just going with Childress. Okay, Godster Charless.

DuCrosse, DuCrisse DuPlace, DuPlace. Are you talking about DDP? This guy in the Tour de France? DDP, yeah, the UFC guy. Or no, DSP? DDP, yeah. I just think of DDP in Dom & Dom's page. Drikus DuPlace. Just go with DDP. DuP I just think of DDP. Drakus, Freakus. Drakus, Duplass. Just go with DDP. Duplassence. This is great because we can't get sued for this even if we get the story wrong. Yeah. Any idea who you're talking about? He beat Israel Adesanya.

Oh, round that. Round four of a UFC fight. Round five, sorry, round five championship fight. But in round four, it was a was a rough rough round for D Chris and He was not looking good he looked like he was clearly gonna lose that fight and then fifth round comes in It is he Is your is your cool thrown the UFC fights from Saturday? I'm Michael with one is decrease duplass Yeah coming back out of nowhere coming waking up from the dead this is like a magic Johnson tweet Yeah, just like just four days later

Decris way to go dude. So is it was a good fight. It was great. Yeah. That was great. It was awesome. It was just you know we didn't see it coming. And now he's now he's got the world in front of him. Yeah. Good for him. Yeah. Cool throw. DDP. Where'd you find that story? Was that just that? No I was watching it on Saturday and then I just kind of forgot about it. Yeah kind of was like let's bring it up. I wasn't watching that. I was kind it on Saturday and then I just kind of forgot about it. Yeah, kind of was like, let's bring it up. I wasn't watching that. I was kind of wish I saved this for Friday. So it would have been nicer if we got even more time in between. I just started doing UFC recaps on Friday.

Yeah, just a week later. Wait, did you say that you weren't really watching the fight? You were watching mostly for Joe Rogan? Well, Joe Rogan had a commentator. Oh, you watched the fight comments. Yeah. I was like, so I got companion. Yeah, it was happening. Yeah. Yeah, he was he didn't buy the pay-per-view He watched Joe Rogan and watch Brendan Schaub watch it. Yeah commentate on it. I like that That's a hell of a way to watch you. His second screen is just his first screen. So they must have said his name a lot Yeah, oh, yeah, you know they would say like they would say his last name a lot. OK. Where's he from?

South Africa. Yeah. Yeah, I just wanted to say this. Yes, the battle of Africa. I'm from South Africa. All right. Good hot, sick, cool. Throw on everyone. Let's do the Mount Rushmore of things that are hard to explain. OK. Mount Rushmore time.

It's brought to you by our friends at Mountain Dew. You see us. We're at camp. This is gonna be the funnest week. We're basically kids again. Mountain Dew. They were a wonderful sponsor of Grit Week as well. You know what we all need to do? We need to get off our ass. With bold flavors, refreshing citrus kick. Mountain Dew will get you off your ass and have you feeling like you're an actual mountain. Hank just dropped a couple of the Mountain Dews. A mountain where the weather is always perfect. Your friends are ready to hang and a day of epic proportions awaits. We're gonna play. I think we're gonna swim. We're gonna be doing some softball. We're gonna do some rock climbing. It's all Mountain Dew. So I've been drinking this Mountain Dew. It is, Mountain Dew is one of those sodas where it's like every time I have them, like, I

need to drink more Mountain Dew. I got the Code Red right here. No soda changed the game harder than Code Red. When Code Red dropped, it was the beginning of the era. They changed the game multiple times. Oh, the Baja Blast. They changed the game. Then they changed the game again.

Yeah, Hank actually taste tested the Baja Blast. Hank invented Baja Blast. And they were a powerhouse before they even changed the game. Yeah, Hank actually taste tested the the Bob less Hank invented Bob. Yeah. And there was there a powerhouse before they even changed the game. Yeah, right. They were they were powerhouse and they changed the game. Then everyone's like, Oh, there's a new game. They're like, whoops, we just changed on you again. Code red. Yeah. So thank you, Mountain Dew. Okay. Mount Rushmore of things that

are hard to explain. Right now we are with five Mount Rushmore is left. Max is already clinched, whatever. Congrats, Max. 65. Good job, Max. Thanks, guys. I have 54, so I'm still in danger. PFT has 47. Hank has 44.

Yes, I am. Anybody's game. Technically, it's cute when you throw that in there. That's nice. Hank, if you rattle off the next five going number one, and I pick a point, I'm screwed. I mean, Hank should have gotten number one last time. a point I'm screwed. I mean Hank should have gotten number one last time. I know the voting. How do you feel about that? You blame the

voters. No I don't. Stop the steal? Yeah. On your Mount Rushmore picks? Yeah Hank looked at it he was the first vote and it had a hundred percent for him and then all of a sudden in the middle of the night they changed all the votes. It's crazy. So are you feeling? I feel good. I mean I feel like this is a perfect Mount Rushmore for you because a lot of things are hard to explain for you. Well, there's a lot of material for Hank to work. Yeah. Yeah. I'm I'm excited. I'm I'm I'm blessed to have the opportunity and I'm I'm looking forward to the end of the season. Okay, you sound

like a bell. You sound like you're about to retire. No, it's a hard game. You know, sometimes a hard game. Sometimes you finish a season, you want to get ready in the offseason and go for next year. And I might have to do some thinking. You got to circle the wagons right now. This is the time where you got to circle the wagons. Over on the playoff push. Hank's thinking is going to be, wow,

I don't have to do this anymore. And then next year he's going to be like, wait, this is back? Yeah. That's going to be the extent. I think we should do teams. I think doing like split up like, wait, this is back. Yeah, that's going to be the extent. I think we should do teams like I don't. I think doing like split up like. I don't know.

It's kind of weird how this was set up next year. Mount Rushmore, we're just going to have to do like me, Max and PFT will have all three of my kids. We'll just use their picks first, Hank, and just see how he does. I should get the first four picks and then you guys go. That's actually not. Yeah, that's not a bad idea. Well, I should get the first four picks and then you guys go. That's actually not. Yeah, that's not a bad idea. Well, I mean, the truth is, Hank, you could very easily beat me.

It's not like I've been great this month. No, you got it. You're you're so no, I'm three points ahead of you. How does the point system work now? 43214321. OK, so there's a good chance, Hank, that you could even surpass me this game. That's literally impossible. No, but you could tie. Yeah good chance that you could even surpass me this game. That's literally impossible. No, but you could tie.

Yeah. Yeah, you could tie. If you get four points and I get zero points. No, one point you get one. You get one for just showing up. This is like the SAT. Hank said four, three, two, one, zero. Yeah, he just but count that.

Fifth place gets zero. My age first. My first. Yeah, get zero. How a snake draft work. Okay. Mike's first place. My first place gets zero. How a snake draft works. OK, what's the order? This is going to be a check on who's sitting out of order. It's going to be Max, me, Big Cat, Hank.

OK. Because Hank went first last time. Now we've got to be on our. He took boobs. Yeah. Feeling boobs. We've got to be smart here because we're zigzagging across the room. We're going to mess up

1000. Yes. Yes. All right. So Max, you're up for I am first Max is like, do you feel you feel good about like making it not competitive? It's not fun. I mean, it's last summer. I didn't let me pick anything. Yeah, actually, that's a great point. I even realized that that you had the best Mount Rushmore picker on your team. Yeah, you still lost. Hank was going for one week. I think I got first every time. Yeah. And since you've already clenched, you can you can open up the book here. How do you go about making your your relatable selections? I don't know. Meatballs. If you have a chance to take meatballs, take meatballs. Yeah, just every other food. It drives the food drafts like the big boys are gonna eat. Yeah, okay max

One you're still blaming food drafts. Yeah, we haven't done food drafts in so Yeah feeling boobs number one. You said like there. It's a bad thing to do Okay, things that are difficult to explain First pick the female anatomy. Oh Including boobs. Yeah, good. Sure. Sure. Female anatomy. That's a good pick. Would you have done that one? One? No, we're at camp. So you just heard over the loudspeaker. We'll probably cut that but we

have announcements. We actually woke up this morning. Cory was over the loudspeaker waking us up being like food is ready. He said breakfast has been canceled due to lack of hustle. Okay. That would have been a good quote movie quote. All right. Yeah, my first overall. Hmm. Well, you said this is hard. No, my first overall, Hank. My person said his first overall, Hank, shut the fuck up. This is

hard because I've got a lot of different ones on here. I have no idea. I'd hope you'd have a lot of different ones. I have no idea how to rank them, though. That's my problem. Go goofy style. OK, I'll go goofy style. Yeah, you're clinging. OK, first overall for me, I'm going to go with how money works.

Oh, good one. How money works finance. Yeah, no idea. Where does money come from? And why is it valuable? What I think it's because you say it's valuable. Then I also agree that it's valuable. So it's valuable. How money works. Yep. Big cat. My pick the universe. So you're taking everything. I guess the technical pick could be I have a hard time explaining just what my pick is because it's so confusing. The the big bang. Are you know the start? God, how big the universe is, is so hard to explain. I

watched a video the other day where they zoomed out. That will fuck you up. Are you talking about? Are you talking about watching the Grateful Dead at the Sphere? No, kind of similar. But it was, yeah, it was like it showed it was someone sitting on a beach in California and then zoomed out. So that actually does sound like the sphere zoomed out and then just kept on zooming out. And it's like, here's our Milky Way or here's our universe. Here's a Milky Way. Then there's millions and I think they just make that shit up though I don't know dude. Yeah, it's it's do you a new universe drops like every other week? But like when you are deciding that but when you think about it, it does not hurt your brain

I had outer space so it's like yeah kind of similar. Yeah, I guess the infinite freaks me out Yeah, thinking about something is infinite makes. The infinite space of the universe. Well, here's the thing is the universe is not infinite. There's like an end to the universe. And it's getting bigger. Yeah, but it's behind us there. Yeah. Light years and things being behind us.

Yeah, right? I think this is a good pick because we don't know. The universe is finite, but it's getting bigger. Yeah. And there's like me during football season. Yes. And there might also be multiple other universes. Got it. And in other universes. But we're a Milky Way is a galaxy.

And then that's in a what Milky Way is a candy bar. In what? What is Milky Way in my pantry? No, Milky Way is is a galaxy that's in the universe. But I think the Milky Way galaxy is part of a cluster of galaxies. Yeah, in the and then there's another like then that's all a cluster and there's another cluster. And there's like, this is just one of those things that if you don't think that there's other life somewhere, you're crazy. You're crazy. Okay. Did you have that on there? Nope. Oh, so you got it down pat. Yeah, I mean, who knows what meaning even exists This might not exist simulation

I will go with Sight to a blind person. Mmm. Okay, I've been doing that recently Have you ever tried to do that? No, have you? I've been with blind people and tried to explain. I've had moments where I've said things out loud, and they've been like, oh, you don't have no idea what I'm talking about. That's kind of mean.

Yeah. Well, you know, I know. It's like you were like, like. What were you explaining? You're like, oh, look at that. Blind, look at those boobs. No, like we had a kid in our old office in Boston that was like, he could kind of see, but not really.

And then I was explaining. Blimelikeproject.net. Yeah, I was telling him a story. You have no idea what I'm saying because you can't really see. Mike, I totally don't. Yes, it. And then I will go with the taste of water. Okay. All right. Good pick. Yeah. What does water taste like? You tell me.

Like, explain it to me. Tastes like life tastes clean. What's clean? I don't I don't know what the taste of what different water honestly, the freakiest thing I ever saw a human do was Jeff D Lowe, taking five different types of water from five different bottled water companies. And then we wrote the names of them on the bottom of the cups. And he went blindly and took five for five, just on taste alone. And then he did it again.

That's insane. He is a freak. Yeah, he is a freak. Okay, my pick. Is it? Yeah. I don't know. It's a good bit. I don't I I can never explain or I mean, I don't know how it works. Big airplanes how they fly. I don't get it. I'll never get it.

Frost is all people say the pilots don't even know, dude, I saw there was a picture where like it was all the fuel that's in a 747. It's all in the wings. And it's like so much fuel. I don't get how they get that in the air. Yeah, it takes like, I don't know, 45 minutes, an hour, sometimes just to put all that fuel into the plane. Fucking crazy. Same thing with with like aircraft carriers, how they

float. Yeah. That's a pick you could take I could take that I did read a thread about that the other day and everyone was just like water displacement yeah okay what does that mean if the if the space of the ship moves out water that is heavier than that space the ship is I don't know don't understand never will understand that. Just say magic. Yeah, planes fly. Yeah. Magically. Is it my turn? Hank? Yes, it is. Okay. My second pick,

I'm going to take the rules of craps. Okay. I've had the rules of craps explained to me probably 10 or 11 times in my life. I've forgotten them 10 or 11 times in my life. I've forgotten them 10 or 11 times in my life. I've played craps.

I think it's just because you were drunk. Yes, yes, I was definitely drunk. But that's not the point. Hate. The point is, it's hard to explain. And it is harder to understand. Yes. Well, yeah, well, it's always in the setting of being drunk. Is that hard to explain? They wouldn't put it in every casino.

Oh, you know, the world. But. The fair counterpoint, fair counterpoint. A lot of people like craps. Yeah, a lot of people do. But they're all drunk and they all just had the rules explained to them that night. And the next day that you ever go to a craps table in the morning, there's nobody there because nobody knows how to play in the morning. True, true. Okay, Max, he's probably gonna have like some

awesome pick right now. I'm gonna go with the NFL cap. Yep, that's a good one. Good pick. I think Max's key is that he also picks things that are less words. Yeah. So the graphic always is bigger. Yeah. Yeah. meatballs, boobs. It's simple system plays. It's a simple mind, simple brain, simple graphic. Okay.

place. It's a simple mind, simple brain, simple graphic. Okay. Simple. Going off of that one word, we've talked about it on this show. Are you going one word? Yep. calculus. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hand up. I actually don't know what calculus is. Nope. No, I I just know it's the math that comes with the most expensive books that we've said before. I've never even met calculus. No, no, I just, I just know it's the math that comes with the most expensive books. Well, we've said it before. I've never even met calculus. No, no one's even shown me a calculus. Goodwill hunting. That's as close as I can.

Calculator is about as close as I've gotten to calculus. Yes. You like, I know you could show me any, you could show me a math formula. I wouldn't be able to tell you if it's calculus or just two plus two. Yeah. A squared plus B squared equals C squared. That's why it was M.X. Algebra. Yeah, I'm just saying letters. Those are equations. Yeah, they are.

OK, I feel like calculus is one of those things that smart people made up. They just invented a puzzle for themselves to teach other smart people so they could all feel smart. Yeah. Oh, it all feel smart. Yeah. Oh, it's PFT. Sorry. Oh, what?

It's not Hank's turn? It's PFT. Yeah. Okay. We got lost. I was wrong. We got lost in snake. I was wrong.

I'm going to go with good pick. This is very difficult for me. What a catch is. Yep. In football. Yep. Okay. No one knows. We still know. That is true. They change it all the time. That's good pick. That's good pick. I had a football one, two football ones. Hmm. I want to do one of them. Uh, yeah, you know

what? I'll do one of them. It's hard to explain why Matt LaFleur kicked a field goal down eight. It is. It's really hard to explain. No, it's easy to explain. It's really fucking hard to explain that. It's very easy hate I like Matt LaFleur as a guy because obviously I hate the team he coaches for but we really have kind of tortured him. Yeah well it's out of love because he's not going to make that mistake again. If he makes that mistake again then I don't know. I would actually respect it. Yeah if he was just like you know what I want to give the PMT guys a little more fodder. Yeah. Okay Hank you have two picks.

I do have two picks. I have three choices. You have three choices and two picks. You want to sound them out? You want to do a group help? You want to say all three, and we'll pick your best two? I got my fourth. We can't do that.

He's still competing with me. How do you get your fourth? It's not over. This is the coddling event that I talked about Yeah, he gets it. No, this is caught. Yeah. Yeah, we're coddling. Hey, I didn't ask you to do this big cat Just said it. I was caught on you. Yeah, he was coddling and then he also Could still lose You do do that like I could

Could you say you've clinched if you haven't mathematically clinched? But if you're competing, then why are you also coddling? But if you do want to sign that, I'm down. Because you're so bad at this and it ruins- But I can still beat you. That's where it's like, which one is it? If I'm so bad at this, why are you worried? I'm like, fuck off, Hank.

You suck at this and you're a little bitch all the time about Rushmore season. All right, I'm going to go with your bad pick your dreams bad pick. No, I think you're Missing that with like the lamest. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that was a bad pick things legit a bad things Your dreams are very easy to explain you're either yeah, my teeth fell out or I almost had sex Yeah, there's no one wants to hear you explain your dreams That's it. It's like if I'm about to have sex in my dream, I'm definitely telling myself, like, wait, this is definitely a dream.

And then I'm going to go. Are you going to back your pickup? No, because you guys are going to say that no matter what. No. No, we're being honest. Your dreams are no one wants to hear you explain your dreams. Explain your dreams. Why would it make perfect sense?

Why is one of the best movies of all time, you know, Christopher Nolan, Inception, and it's basically the whole concept is how, like, you know, everyone has these crazy detailed dreams and then you wake up the next day and it's like, you kind of remember some details, but you can't and then you wake up and say, I had the plot of Inception would have been buried. Exactly. Or is it stellar?

Yes. Alright, so that's why I explain my picks, because you're just going to tear it down. I don't give a s- I don't care. Well, I'm not coddling you. I'm going to go with V down. I don't give a shit Var also easy. Yeah, basically just like the challenging and football the camera Like the most popular casino games in the history It's like the 1500s Hank Hank, Hank, can you explain it to me? Yeah, it's a game on a table.

There's rules. I don't play craps, but it's like if it's hard to explain to me why there's everyone, explain to me your dreams. Okay, so sometimes my teeth fall out in my dreams, and that's when you turn your brain off. Explain to me VAR. Okay, that's when the video does the robot thing and gets it right.

What's the robot thing? How's the robot guy? Hawkeye technology, what is like the rule though? There's camera. What are they determining 1984? There's cameras everywhere got it Pick everything up good. Thanks. That was really helpful. I get it now You know exactly what VAR is I? What is it? When a camera that tells you if it's a goal or not? How does it determine it? Because it's a camera. Is a camera like AI? Like it's sentient? It's a camera that can see on the field and know when the ball crossed the line.

Interesting. Yeah, I'm confused though, but that's I guess it's really easy. Well, you must be pretty dumb. Yeah, I definitely am. Piece of shit. I enjoyed that. I like how Big Hat and I just kind of tap down. Let you guys go ahead and go at it for a little bit. Two gladiators in the ring. Hank and I are locked in a battle for last place. The gloves are off. What are you typing? Who are you typing to? What are you typing? He's Google-ing crap. You're looking up crap rules, because you don't know.

No, I'm looking up, I'm looking up, Big Cat asked me to talk about VAR. Oh, I mean, VAR is just, yeah. It's easy. It's very easy. What are you looking up, Hank? Nothing. Honorable mentions. Well, I mean, now we is just, yeah. It's easy. It's very easy. What are you looking up, Hank? Nothing. Honorable mentions.

Well, no. We still got picks left. I guess, Big Hanna, you just don't want us to pick? Oh, I forgot. Yeah. Yeah. OK. All right, my last pick.

I got to get a good one. I screw up my last picks every time. Oh. I screw up my last picks every time. Oh, uh, internet jokes slash memes to not internet people. Yeah. Like when we were talking about very AJ and big justice the other day. Yes. Yeah. We realized that quickly.

This is a conversation that needs to stay between a man and the internet. Yeah. Because like if you just go out of there's a lot of people, a lot of people listening to this right now don't have Twitter, Instagram. They're not like just scrolling all day like we are. And then when you have a conversation with them, it's I had

one where I explained I just explained to people Big Mike. Yeah, so, you know, Big Mike is, you know, Big Mike is and people like, what are you talking about? I was like, yeah, no, it's a it's a big thing who Big Mike is, you know who Big Mike is, and people are like, what are you talking about? I was like, yeah, no, it's a big thing, Big Mike. Okay. Mine's actually kind of similar to that. Wait. What?

You're not up, Max. Oh, damn. Hank is tapped out, by the way. Anyone who's listening to Pardon My Take for the first time, this is when Hank taps out. I'm thinking about getting real political with my last pick here. Thanks, Hank.

Real political. I liked your dream pick. I just had to shoot on it. I think dreams are very easy to spot. He's not giving me eye contact. Okay, so for my last one, I'm gonna take wind. Good pick. Yeah, that's a Good pick.

Yeah, that's a good pick. Break it down, Hank. The earth. Yeah. Yeah. Tell me about when we're spinning really fast. Yeah. So so when it always comes in one direction. Yeah. Fuck. When was the bad pick, actually? No, I don't.

I think I think when it's not going to look good, when doesn't pop, when when probably doesn't it doesn't pop Max probably has something that's gonna pop. Yeah, it's gonna pop big time I do have one that could pop but I'm gonna I'm gonna go more niche because it's cuz you're just running up the score on us Yeah Basically, um, so I'm just gonna go with our job to someone who doesn't who doesn't know barstool good. Yeah, I had good job to someone who doesn't who doesn't know Barstool. Good one. I had good one. But I mean, that's not going to look good on a on a graphic because it's literally only

hard for us to explain. And it's also people voting know what Barstool is. Correct. Yeah. But you can just say you I just I just say like if someone if I don't want to have a conversation, I just say I do like or not anymore. But I'd say I still say it to get out of the conversation like just, you know, video production, video and audio. We say, oh yeah, like there's a little, you know, like we just do try to explain what we're doing like this week to someone who like doesn't understand. Why would you be explaining that? Like, why would they be like, people ask what you do? And then I'm like, like a

podcast and they say like, oh, as like a hobby. Yeah. And I'm like, no, I actually make money. They're like, hey, he's just trying to for other people's picks to be bad. Yeah. There's nothing more. I mean, that's a bad pick on the ground. It's like, it's pretty easy to be like, oh yeah, just do like video and audio production and they go, yeah, you know, like, you know, the pizza guy, like, yeah, there's nothing more embarrassing. The pizza guy. Yeah, you know, I just basically say, you know, Miss Peaches, I work for her daddy. Yeah, I'm Miss Peaches assistant. Yeah, like, oh, yeah, that makes sense. Writing down podcaster on occupation on like a custom form to coming into the United States is tough.

A customs form. How about like a fucking elementary school form for your kid? That's the worst. Just like smut blogger slash podcast. Yeah, you're like I'm a podcast with like free lunch then. Yeah. Okay. What honorable mentions Hank? A color. Is that what you were going to decide between? Yeah, actually, that would have been an awesome pick. Then dreams. Yeah. I'm not going to let you switch. That might even know. That's where we're competing. Okay, I know. I I was gonna say the afterlife that was going to be my one that would death that would pop up. Yeah, death, death to a child how babies get made to a child. I had this one was a niche one but trying to explain

to someone that you can't dunk from the free throw line while shooting a free throw impossible. It's really hard to do. I had that you can't tackle the quarterback playing tackle football. Yep. Rules of baseball. Yeah, I had batting average. Yep. New kickoff rules. Taxes. Batting average is easy. Batting average is so easy. Yeah. Explain it to me. It's you, if you bat 10 times and you get three hits. You understand fractions. And seven outs, you get, you your batting 300. Isn't there more to it than that?

No, you're thinking of like war would be good. I'm gonna pitch 10 balls to you. And if you get three hits, your batting average would be 300. I'm thinking of slugging. Slugging is still pretty easy. Yeah. It's more like war hits.

Well, yeah, you have to get a hit to get on base. Slugging is hit. It's get on base. I'm glad I didn't take batting. Yeah, that would have been a horrible, horrible that would have been one of the worst. When Hank says do not understand fractions, that's how you know that you fucked up. Here's one that I was trying to, I was thinking about and I was, I think there's something there, but it'd be hard to but it it's hard to explain to people that you're not triggered online because the minute you say you're not triggered online, you're triggered online. I'm not owned. Yeah, right. So it's by definition, it's hard to explain it because people are like, yeah, you are. You're

responding to me right? Yeah, I had taxes explaining emotions via text. Yeah, emojis. That's what they're no, but like if someone would be like, oh, like you're mad and it's like, I just sent like I sent a text message with no, there's no emotions to the sentence trying to deciding that. So that's specifically you. What do you mean? You give

off multiple people have told you that you give off asshole vibes over text. I just give short answer. Yeah, I think that's you. So this is like someone asked a question like yes. And they'll be like, why were you mad? You say yes period though. No, I don't. Yeah, you do. You think I'm adding extra extra grammar? No, that's true. That's a good point. I did have the plot to interstellar. No, people just decide like, but Hank, yeah, you're you're you're a big okay. Yes. Okay, is one that big time. Okay big time okay guy hey we're going to do this okay but you could be like yeah that's fine yeah like yeah if you like say a sentence no this is getting Hank can't exist no if I said to you like hey let's or if you said to me like hey the plan today

is we're gonna do this this this I just. I just write back. Okay, that does feel a different vibe. It does. Okay is different. Yeah. That's great. Yeah. Yeah. Sounds great. Right. Yeah. Okay. We could pull every single person at this company and everyone would be like, yeah, I don't know if Hank likes me over text replying just okay definitely gives a vibe of like okay fine you know what Hanks yeah that's no yeah but like that's you're deciding that that's why I tell me the plan today you're gonna do the yak that we're gonna draft teams for camp bars well

then we're gonna do the first field day stream activity for Mountain Dew okay yeah if you said it like that that's how you say it. Or say it again, say it again. We're gonna do the Yak, we're gonna draft teams, we're gonna do the. That sounds great, exclamation point. Yeah, that would be that gear sarcastic, fuck off. Thank you, you seem like the kind of guy

that would put the dot dot, like two periods after okay. Okay, dot dot. You're basically rolling your eyes. I it's it's taxing as a means to an end. All right. Other honorable man. I had a lot of mention I probably should have taken. I had a trying to explain that you went to the strip club. You didn't get a lap dance or go to the back room.

You just went there with the guys. Why other people did why you liked an Instagram post? Well, that one's pretty easy. LeBron. It's big tits. Yeah. Artificial intelligence. Yep. Black holes. That you're not paranoid. They're just out to get you. Very hard thing to explain. Really, really hard thing to explain to people. Love. Yeah. The number zero. Yep. What about that? The CIA is behind a lot of shit. No, yeah, that's you just said it though. Yeah, but like, what I just said, I said a lot of shit. It's more than that. I actually think the CIA is behind so much shit that they're behind the

idea, right? That the CIA behind everything. So now you think the CIA is super powerful, right? That the Bears have never had a 4,000 yard passer in over a hundred years of playing You know Jason Campbell almost had that yeah cutler got was close and he got hurt. I Almost said Ben Mance. Yeah, that's a good one magnets Yeah, how do they work? Yeah, Rico Bosco be another I had both of them

Those are the two those are the two bar still employees I had on my list How Pete Carroll didn't run with Marshawn on the one-yard line tough to explain very hard to explain very hard to explain good pick They're the new kickoff rules. Yep, so that like four times You have am I wrong you want to explain them? No, I'm saying, I just, you clearly don't understand them. What if after you clinch big cat, we just let them go mono-mono? Yes, yes.

I think that would be- If I clinch, say we'll go mono-mono, we'll just do our honorable mentions after. We can do it. Yeah, we'll do a post-shelter. Hell in the cell. We'll put them in an actual cell. In a gulag.

Put them in the gulag. It's like a post-credit scene. Yep. For every part of my take in the fall. They should have to pick eight. Yes, that would be fun. Oh, but I don't know if Hank can, you can't stretch, Hank is like a shitty middle reliever. He can maybe give you one and two thirds innings.

If you make him stretch out to five innings. No way. Although color was good. Hey buddy, I can still beat you. Yeah, you can color. You should pick color. Color was a great pick. Color was actually color could have been one one. Yeah, I'm sure. Yeah, I always this is my my my honorable mentions are usually better than my picks. Yeah, the way she goes. Okay.

Any others? Any other honorable mentions? Time zones. Time are usually better than my picks. Yeah. The way she goes. OK. Any others? Any other honorable mentions? Time zones. Time zone. China only having one time zone is crazy. That is why I pull my mind every time I see it. Yep. They have one time zone. Max. Why doesn't the world just have one time zone? Can you answer me that? They only have one time zone.

Because then people would be like sleeping it. Yeah, but that it's just like season. So you could say like noon here in the United States is midnight in Hong Kong. That sounds like that. They just know that noon is nighttime. It's just one clock for everybody. Max, I'm looking at like a globe of time zones. Yeah, China has one time zone because 97% of China is all lives like

on the east side. Mm hmm. So but there's people who live all the way out there. Yeah, they get screwed. Tibet. They're just absolutely screwed by the time zones. Free Tibet. Russia has 11. How does Russia have 11 and China has one? Well, China has more but they just said we only have one. Okay. they only acknowledge they only acknowledge one. It's like if you built an entire country out of Arizona. Yeah, I thought this was one of those like Atlanta is closer to, you know, the other weird one that I saw the other day is Spain is the same. Spain is the same time zone, I think, is like Germany or something.

There's something weird with that where they're like flopped. There's just weird with that. Where they're like flopped. There's just weird time zones. I think Spain in World War Two, the Spanish government wanted to align closer to Germany. They they took their time zone. Yeah. So Spain is like, you know, you know, where Spain is on a map. It's right underneath France. Yeah. And they have different time zones. That's a try hard move on Spain's. Yeah, it's a cuck move. Yeah. It's like, Hey, guys, you're taking another it's a cuck. Yeah, it's like, hey, guys, you're taking another man's time. Exactly. Yeah, that's ridiculous. Okay. Good job, guys. Good Mount Rushmore. Yeah. Good vibes all around. It's

one of those things I love whenever we have a big interview because we're about to get to Caleb Williams and maybe some new fans and they listen to that. Yep. And they're like, I had a friend text me he was listening to the Mount Rushmore of Cheese. And with his wife in the car. Wait, Mount Rushmore. Yellow, yellow. He's making us listen to part of my take where they're arguing over yellow foods and whether certain foods are yellow or gold. Pure gold is a rich orange yellow color. It's been going on for 15 minutes. The freshest pasta is always yellow. It's still going.

That's a great one. That is good. I just got a text from random number. Hello, are you Lisa? Hmm, I think I have to be Lisa. No, this is this is a scam. Yes, please. I like how you know it's a scam and you're still. I'm gonna scam them right back. It's Lisa.

All right, PFT, let's do the ad and then we'll get to Caleb Williams. Before we get to Caleb Williams, brought to you by our great friends over at Mountain Dew, we're here at Camp Barstool. You know what we all need to get more of? Off our ass. With bold flavors and and refreshing citrus kick,

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Wherever refreshing beverages are sold and do the do and now here is Chicago Bears quarterback Caleb Williams Okay, we now welcome on a very very very very special, very special guest. It is QB1 of the Chicago Bears, Caleb Williams, Heisman Trophy winner. First of all, Caleb, thank you for joining us. I was very close to saying savior of the franchise, but I'm not going to put that on you. How's camp going? Let's start with that. Camp is camp is good. The defense has been the defense has been challenging me throughout Camp OTAs all of that. So it's been great You know offense we've been we've been starting to pick it up and it's been fun. Okay

I've been having the the hard knocks cameras around. Yeah, you don't really notice them. They do it. They do a pretty good job Other than the times when you know, you're having you're having talks and you're like, oh, I got a yeah Michael But my head but other than the times when you know you're having you're having talks you're like oh I got a yeah microphone my head but other than that you know it's they've been great did you watch a week one of hard knocks I watched the beginning I haven't gotten back to it I watched the heard that the Bulls the Bulls introduction was was was happening so I wouldn't watch that part and then one of the nights I had to go to sleep. There's some good slow mo shots of the spirals. Yeah, that's what we tune in for. For the sprinklers going on. We tune in for the spirals. Yeah, they might have gotten mad at me or not mad at me. They made fun of me because I got triggered because I thought they weren't showing enough touchdown passes. Okay, so I was defending you. I was like, let's get some more highlights going.

Okay, so I was defending you. I was like, let's get some more highlights going Yeah, hopefully this I think the next episode comes out in a few days. Yeah, hopefully the next episode We got a few more spirals and touchdowns in there Yeah, so I mean you're you're obviously a very confident guy has the transition obviously we haven't started the regular season But the transition to the NFL been what you kind of expected Yeah, I mean I knew it was gonna be challenging. I knew as a kind of expected? Yeah, I mean, I knew it was gonna be challenging. I knew it was a offensive wise, I knew it was a new language for me, a new way of doing things. And so just understanding my situation, understanding that the guys are, you know, they're gonna push me, coaches, the players, and then they're

also gonna be gracious with me, learn that throughout this process. And so now just picking up the speed, you speed, getting better with things, processing things a lot faster, checks, alerts, all of that. So it's been great. It's been fun. It's been challenging. But the transition was, I've had to move a couple of times, whether it was transfer from Oklahoma to USC,

or all of that stuff. And so now it's been a normal transition. I feel like people kind of memory hold the whole Oklahoma part of your career because you were obviously the number one pick for two years, which that's tough because people are gonna poke holes in everything. But you went to Oklahoma, you weren't the starter,

and then you won the starting job halfway through the year. And everything I've read, it was like, the minute you showed up, there was a story about how at 6 AM, they wouldn't let freshmen lift, but you basically forced your way in there. Has that just been your mindset from the beginning? Even if they don't let me come in here, I'm going to go compete. Yeah.

I would say my mindset has always been compete. Ever since I really switched to the position of quarterback around 10 years old, I understood that I may have started later than most QBs at that time. Cause a lot of QBs in my class have been QBs for their whole life. And so I switched to that

and I just was competing versus people. I mean, somebody that I was competing versus and training, just working out working hard And not actually like QB training was like Blake Corm and he's unbelievable like his work ethic and all of that is unbelievable so you know just just getting in there competing versus people that that are older than me bigger faster stronger and then you know when I Get to those positions that I've been in with Oklahoma You know, when I get to those positions that I've been in with Oklahoma and high school,

all those other positions that I've been in, just go out there, compete, work my tail off and get after it. Yeah. I mean, I want to bring up because winning the job as a freshman with a starter in place, that's dog mentality. Yeah. But then you go to USC and everyone's like, oh, LA soft. You know, there's a whole perception there. But I just want to remind people.

I'm an East Coast kid. You want it. Yeah. And you won that starting job as a freshman. Yep. Yeah, so the story about you deciding I'm going to be a quarterback now. You're playing defense, right?

Yeah, so I was playing right back and linebacker. A little bit of safety. And then we lost the game, lost the FBU game, which is, I think, y'all know what FBU is? No. So it's basically like an all-star team from each region. Okay. So they have, and state and things like that. So they, for us, they had a couple of different,

because DMV, we kind of bunch everybody together. So, it was a FBU Maryland national team, and we went down, we were whooping up on a bunch of teams. We lost to actually Harrison Bailey. I think he just left UNLV. He's a quarterback there. But we lost to him and I didn't like the way we were playing. We were playing kind of daddy ball with the coach

and the QB on our team and I switched and my kind of thing was spread the ball around and everybody go win games and be a big reason why. So you're 10 years old and you decide, I'm gonna be a quarterback now. And was that a complete lifestyle change for you? It was more of, I was probably, because I went more into like,

I'd already decided what I'm gonna do. And then my dad and godfather and all those people kind of put together a plan, from training to eating to when I wake up and things like that. That's incredible. So you're 10 years old and you're like, this is my plan to be in the NFL. Because I had a plan to be in the NBA

when I was 10 years old. Didn't really work out. Do you ever think back, we set ourselves to do something at 10 years old and now we're here? That's nuts it's nuts I do think about it and I don't I don't know if I'm gonna classify it as nuts in a way like it's it's it's a tell you I don't really know there's that word but you know I expected myself to be here but it is it is crazy I wake up every day and I'm like it's got to feel like a superpower that you were able because like

We were joking about it. There was a draft story When the draft happened like someone there's a story about some kid wrote down when he was like eight I'm gonna be in the NFL draft and we were joking like every eight year old right side the same There's only a few guys that get drafted So to see that and have that plan at what point in in that plan like what age were you like? Okay, this plans actually like this. Yeah, it's probably It was probably after I started training and getting after probably two years after I started training Is when I was like, okay, this is actually you know, it's gonna happen can happen

You know, that's when I started getting to, what was I, I was probably seventh grade, and then I hit eighth grade. So around ninth grade is when I was like, this can really happen, because I started getting out there playing with guys that were older than me. All the training was kind of working and things like that. So kept all that going, and then starting to get some offers, played well first year of high school,

and then the offers and everything started climbing. Confidence kept rising and growing because of the work that I kept putting in and was putting in before high school and things like that. Yeah, I read a story about when you were 16 you broke your offensive coordinator's wedding ring. I would imagine that was also a moment that you were like, oh shit I got a cannon. Yeah, so he he he his wife always told him don't don't you know catch for laws with the wedding ring on wedding band and He was he didn't didn't listen And then one day his hand started bleeding

He looks at it and he was trying to figure out what happened and then I Realized that it was it was cracked a little bit and that's pinching his skin. From your pros. Home wrecker. Yes. She's like, what the hell is wrong with this? Home wrecker. Yes. I read that you ate the same meal every day for like four years? Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. It's eggs, eggs with ham in it. Then I'd have an inshore in my vitamins. And how old were you when you started doing this? 10. So that's when everything started. So not buffalo wings and ice cream. Not buffalo wings and ice cream. What about candy you candy guy? I love candy actually Everyone has to have a vice. Yeah. Yeah, that's my that's my vice

Not big into all the other stuff Do any of that stuff and so candy was my Candy was my getaway. I'm bad in video games. I like that Yeah Kenny was my getaway. I'm bad in video games. I like that, yeah. I'm a big food guy myself and if I had seen Coach Riley's brisket before I went to Oklahoma, I would never have gone. That thing is so fucking bad. It was actually pretty good though. It was pretty good. You're just saying that because you're Coach. No, no, no. We give Coach Riley some shit.

Yeah. But it was actually pretty good. But that wasn't the one we ate. We ate another one that he cooked and it was it was it looked good he violated rule number one of the internet which is don't post don't post a picture yeah never put your meat online ever people are gonna roast it don't put your meat online yeah yeah number one rule don't put your meat online so your transfer from Oklahoma to USC I have a very specific question that is going to make me feel like a fool. I went to Wisconsin. There was the Wisconsin story of rumors and

stuff. Was there any truth to it ever? So my best friend and his dad, so what Dean Ingram was at Wisconsin and his dad was a coach. And so we reached out to them. We were trying to just get the vibe and see what was going on, how it was up there, whatever, or over there and all of that. And somehow it caught wind that I was in contact with them, which I'm consistently in contact with those two because I've grown up with them.

But somehow it caught wind and it blew up on Instagram, in Sicily in contact with those two, because I've grown up with them. But somehow it caught wind and it blew up on Instagram, but it wasn't too huge. So it was never really close. It was never too, yeah, it wasn't too crazy. Was there any Badger fans DMing you stuff? Yeah, there were a lot of Badger fans. Any 37-year-olds DMing a 20-year-old being like,

hey, we could sell a lot of t-shirts? Probably. Probably. Yeah, I did that. It was pretty embarrassing for me, especially because in my heart of hearts, I was like, he's never going to go to Wisconsin. But I still shot off a couple of DMs being like, dude,

we could sell some T shirts. Yeah. Yeah, no, it uh, I fell a little short on the end. Yeah, it fell a little short. I don't think it was going to happen in the end, but much respect to the Badger fans. Okay. Okay. Yeah, you tried. Yeah, I tried. I tried my best and I just want to say for the record, I felt weird DMing you out of the blue being like, Hey

man, you should come to Wisconsin. We could sell like over 100 t shirts. It was a low point, but I was trying anything. That's all right. But now you're here. So now I'm here. Yeah. So, so I'm excited. The, do you, I've seen your quotes, but you, you're basically like, listen, the history, the past is the past. I'm here to be myself. Has anyone explained to you the history of Chicago bears quarterbacks? I just know that there's never been

three or 4,000 in a 30 plus touchdown pass and things like that. It's an insult meme that goes around. Yeah, I see that time. I always see the edits of like all 31. Yeah. And then there's Chicago. Yeah, so I think you gotta change that.

Yeah, we got to do it. We'll try and change that. We got the guys to do it. I saw when you had the quote, like my job is to rewrite history and people like oh, he's so cocky I was like no it it actually shouldn't be that much how They brought me here for reasons. Yeah because if they

Had people like Aaron Rodgers or anything like that. Yeah, it wouldn't be that it wouldn't be well, not him. He's wrong. Yeah, sorry He's with the Jess now. Yeah, we don't care anymore. Yeah. Yeah. Big. You have people like that and a history in a lineage of QBs that were ripping it up in this later stage of the NFL where, you know, they were thrown at 30 times a game. Then, you know, that'd be the case, but it hasn't been the case. And they obviously bring people in, like Keenan and DJ and myself and all the offensive linemen, D-line people to change history. Do you ever like, what's the line

between cocky and confidence? Because I feel like you get accused of being cocky when it's everything I've read, all the stories. It's like, no, he's just supremely confident in himself. Why wouldn't you want a guy who's confident in himself? Yeah, I think the difference is knowing yourself. I also think the difference is the people around you, and how hard you work.

I think those are the three biggest things. And I think the biggest part is the people around you. And the second one is the people around you and the second one is probably how hard you work and I say that one first because the people around you you got to have the right people around you to tell you when it's time to alright like you know you're pushing a little bit you're doing this and that like you know you have people around you as no people as they say and not yes men and yes women. So having people around me like that

and then getting after it. Always, you know, hard work always builds confidence and hard work always pays off. It always, you know, at the end of it gives you a checkmark. Yeah. I'm glad that you're post draft because leading up to the draft, it felt like that took a long time to get there. There were a lot of bullshit out there. There was a lot of lot of bullshit. The anonymous scouts. You had one scout or I think it was a GM compared to you to Prince. But like that's yeah, the greatest. I don't get that one just because I yeah, he picked the worst like was like, wait, he's gonna be the Prince

of quarterback. Sign me up. Yeah, I mean, I actually saw that. Yeah, I actually think I saw you say it popped up on my explore page or something Yeah, I didn't I mean it was a lot of a lot of bullshit. Yeah Even before it's the nicest thing that I didn't mind being compared to Prince cuz he's it's a great compliment You're gonna change your name to just the Lombardi trophy Yeah, if someone said we were the prince of podcasters, I'd be like, awesome. Yeah, the revolution. Incredible. So was there ever a moment though where the stories were getting, I mean,

at one point it was like, K.O. Williams wants to own the Bears. Yeah. And I trolled a little bit. I mean, I was bored. I had so much free time. I was just chilling in my room or working out. And so it was just like,'m gonna you know step in every once a while and just kind of mix it up a little bit. You should mix it up. You had one of our co-workers you made them change their profile picture. His name Jack? Yeah, you just replied to him you're like your profile picture is crazy and then he changed it. It was a kill shot. Yeah, he always, he he always I've actually since high school He's he's he's responded to a couple my stuff. So I was I was joking with him. Yeah

The pink cell phone at you were watching juju play I actually did not I think my cell phones over there Yeah, no, I actually broke my pink cell phone. Oh on accident. So so what are we doing? So I have a I have to get a new one actually. Right now it's black. I'm trying to get a new pink one. The phone was pink though. Everything else was not pink. The case was pink or the phone was pink? The phone is pink. Oh, that's actually cool. It's a pink iPhone. Hey listen, are you getting another one? I'm trying to. Alright, then I will too. I had a red one for a while. It went hard. And so they got cool colors. They got yellow and blue and all this other stuff and also stuff don't apologize yeah I didn't

apologize yeah you're holding the pink phone and then Jack McGuire Jack max CFP says pink phone is crazy not gonna lie yeah and I said you your profile or your profile pick yes and they changed it thank you for your service yes yeah the stories before the draft it it was just like, every week, it was like, how can we poke holes in Caleb Williams, is seemingly what was put out there. There are rumors like you didn't want to go to Chicago at some point.

But was there a team going into that last season that if they had the number one pick overall, you decided that you didn't want to be in that situation? I don't know. I think within the NFL, I think they've done a good job, you know, of whether it's the owners and the coaches and the things like that. I wasn't against going home, as people said also throughout the process. It was just, it was going to be, it'd be like, uh, Katie, you know, Katie didn't really want to go home and it wasn't cause necessarily the team or anything like that was more of the, like everybody in my family is there and you know, family

or it's the family that's not family that I've known for so long or been around or have it known or the new family that everybody talks about. So it was more or less, um, having to deal with all of that and make it a huge distraction for me and take away from the thing that I enjoy doing. I love doing every single day. Yeah, I would have been happy with that. I'm a commander's fan from Northern Virginia myself. They've been doing a great job.

Yeah, they've been doing a great job recently. I think it worked out well. I think you've got a great home here. I think Jaden's gonna be a great quarterback too. So I told Big Cat, it's cool with me if you guys win six Super Bowls. I'll take three. I'm not gonna be greedy. He's very nice. I hope it works out for both of us and we all get to look back on this. Yeah I think things turned out well for you. So now that you're playing football you mentioned all the guys that you have

to throw the ball to. Yeah. There's just one ball. It's just one ball. It's just one ball. Always is. So you've got three excellent receivers. Yep. Well, and Colt Comet. And Colt Comet. And De'Andre Swift. Yep. And Gerald Everett.

How are you going to keep them all happy? Gerald Everett's a beast. You're going to keep them all happy with just one ball? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I wouldn't say it's easy. It's obviously, you know, it's going to be the fun part about it. Within the coaches and us scheming it up, and with us also understanding early in the games and things like that, get

your guys a ball, keep them engaged and then when it's time to go win games, all these guys also understand when it's time to go win games, it's time to go win games, you know? So I wish that means I'd have time and things like that. It's you know, who gets the ball, go make plays, let's go win this game. But early in the game, it's important to one, scheme up, and then two, figure out what the defense is doing, what they're gonna be doing for the game, and then three,

what points can you get your guys the ball in easy touches. Yeah. Just blame coach, just be like, sorry DJ, coach told me. Well, I'd assume all those guys too, none of them ever been like, I'm not open right now. They all are open.

No, they're always like, they're open, which is, I mean, you want them. That's what you want, yeah. And you want guys that's like, throw me the like, I'm not open right now. They all are open. No, they're always like, they're open, which is, I mean, you want them. That's what you want, yeah. You want guys that's like, throw me the ball, I'm open. But we also have to have an understanding of like, you know, I have reads, I have progressions, I have, you know, I saw this, I didn't like how you ran this.

We didn't agree on the same page. You weren't, you know, I was hesitant on your route, so I moved on, you know, things like that. But also, constant and open communication with the guys is also important, so I moved on, things like that, but also constant and open communication with the guys is also important, so that we can always be on the same page and keep growing. Yeah, so you haven't signed up for this, but I've signed myself up for it.

I'm a Caleb Williams protector online. I appreciate that. And I'm just wondering if there's anything that I need to, like any standard lines, like people do the fingernails, like who cares? Like you can't- Yeah, I'm gonna do it this year. So- Yeah, oh you are?

Yeah, I just haven't done it for, I try to- Love that. Do it for games, all of like, you know, regular season, things like that, playoffs. Also, cause I've been doing it for so long now, I'm trying to like make sure I can do it for games, cause I run out of ideas. So what should I say to people,

just being like mind your own business? I mean- Should I do it for games? I'll run out of ideas. So what should I say to people? Just being like mind your own business? I mean. Should I do it for games? I mean, I think Prince painting his nails, right? Yeah, yeah, that's facts. Okay. Are you gonna put the F word on there? I will not be doing that.

Roger Goodell would have, he would have some things to say. Yeah, he'd have some things to say. I'm trying to keep, you know, good spirited things on my nails. But it fires you up, right? It does fire me up. All right, so that's the answer I'm gonna say.

It fires you up. I can use other stuff that'll fire me up. Okay. All right. I can. Yeah. There's other things that what about words, maybe some acronyms, maybe some, maybe SMDGB. Yeah, I like that. I don't know what that means. I just, I mean, I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. What about, uh, the people always like, oh, well, he cried after a loss. Like, dude, guys can't cry and also yeah I'm here like I want my I mean if I want to if We win the Super Bowl, you know at some point. I'm hoping that we have multiple people out there crying tears of joy so I lose I know how

Important it is that these games that we win and lose so trying to win every game is what we go out there to do That's why we're here now. That's why we have practice throughout the week. So, you know, teardrop, you know, it's also, you know, there's a time and a place for it, but, you know, if a tear drops, I mean, it's how much I care for winning and losing. Right. Yes. Right. It means that you care. I would much rather someone have that emotion than no emotion. Or laughing. Yeah. Or yeah. Or like just being like, I don't care. I'm just getting paid. Yeah. With the Super Bowl thing. This is very important. Are you planning on wearing a visor? This is very important. Are you gonna be wearing a visor in this if you take anything away from this interview?

This is the most important part. Yeah, I don't switch. I wouldn't need a switch unless it was like raining. Okay. All right good good It'll be indoors. Yeah, we're back with the visors everyone a Super Bowl. That's sick. I know if you knew that yeah also long hair I don't know how long you're gonna get your hair. Yeah, it's gonna be indoors. Yeah. No quarterback with a visor has ever won a Super Bowl. That's sick. I don't know if you knew that. Also long hair. I don't know how long you're going to get your hair. Yeah, it's going to be long. How long? It'll be pretty long. However long it's going to grow. Let's cut it right where the Super Bowl winning is. That's the length. That's why I've never won a Super Bowl.

These are the analytics that we go through. What about the people with short hair though? They win a lot. They win a lot of Super Bowls. Yeah. Think about Tom Brady. What about the people with short hair though? They went with a lot of winter a lot of Super Bowls Yeah, think about Tom. What about the ones that lost? They have they've lost is one Super Bowl when he had one of his Super Bowls when he had long hair It's same with Big Ben. Yeah, Big Ben when Big Ben had a visor too in the Super Bowl that he lost Yeah, these are really important things Yeah, yeah, no, I won't think you know football. We know football twice I won't think twice about it though. Yeah? Okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We're just gonna go out there and run the score up.

Okay. I respect that. I like that. What about the Notre Dame game? People love talking about the Notre Dame game. People love talking about it. It's crazy. One game? My one tough game in three years. It's alright. I mean, it happens. I'll have a tough game in hopefully my long career in the NFL. And it's gonna happen. It's how you come back and the confidence and hard work that you put in to come back and recoup and go out there and go win the next game. I like that, I have my marching orders. I'm defending you online. Now what about people who get maybe a little too excited?

Should we just try to take it one game at a time? You can take it one game at a time, you can have at it, you do your thing. Whatever floats your boat. Okay. Just be you. Yeah, just be you. Yeah, just be you because yeah There was someone said I saw this one guy say, you know what? I'm done being mature I tried for an hour and it sucks Cale Williams is a guy. I need to get out of my own head He's gonna be so fucking good. I'm gonna be so fucking happy and life is gonna be amazing suck my dick from the back That after an hour of your preseason game, all right

So you can like it now that's what's great How crazy are you going with the likes these days No, not crazy. Yeah, I would do I'm still fearful that it like they're gonna change Yeah, I don't really go in and like and stuff No, not crazy. I'm still fearful that they're going to change it back at that point. I don't really go in and like and stuff. He's going to flip it on and we're all just going to be standing there with our clothes off like, what the hell just happened? I got some stuff I got to clean up.

Got to go back into the history here. I read that you drink four ginger beers a day. I back down from that diet-wise and things like that. It's a lot of sugar in them. That's a lot of ginger beer. Yeah. I back down from that diet-wise and things like that. It's a lot of sugar in them. That's a lot of ginger beer. Yeah, I'm actually trying to create my own ginger beer with not as much sugar. Oh.

Because I love it so much. And I wanted to be able to drink it. It's so good. And it's always, and I actually learned that. I'm going to start drinking it. Yeah. I'm going to have to just do everything. It's pretty good.

Have you tried it? No, I've had ginger beer before. It's fantastic. You got to try the right now. I'll get to y'all on what you know, it's gonna be You got to try a fever tree. That's the best one right now. And then when mine when yours comes out Yeah, we're gonna blow that up My grandfather used to drink old-time ginger beer really when I was growing up and so I would have some I don't know I like that is I like it was it was powerful it had that it's nice to

it yeah and I feel like kids kids don't drink ginger beer anymore yeah it's so good for you that also it's good for your stomach and all like it's a bunch it has a bunch of bunch of awesome benefits from it but it is you know get a little bit of sugar so I'm back down from that yeah back down from bring it back you're doing a work with the foundation that you just started right Caleb cares Caleb cares where's Caleb cares yeah so Caleb cares is like a it's We'll bring it back. You're doing a work with the foundation that you just started, right? Caleb Cares. Caleb Cares. Where's Caleb Cares?

Yeah. So Caleb Cares is like a, it's an anti-bullying and mental health, you know, nonprofit that we try and do our best with anything that we can do. And a lot of times it's with boys and girls clubs that we try and help out with and reach out and show up in person. We've done it in LA, DC, now here in Chicago. Trying to grow it. I want it to be a huge thing globally and be able to use my platform a good person to be able to help and reach out. People need to reach out to Caleb Cares and get help or whatever case may be

or just talk to somebody and things like that. We're trying our best to do that. That's awesome. We'd love to help in any way that you ever need it. Awesome. Remember that show? I forget what channel it was on where there would be a bully and then they would invite the bully out to do something.

There would be an MMA fighter that was waiting. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, well, we don't do it like that. We don't beat up bullies? Yeah, we don't beat up bullies. I mean, for people that grades, or they get in trouble, or whatever the case may be, just trying

to shed some good light on what things should be and how they should be. And we've had so far pretty awesome success through the process that we've been through and showing up, being in person, going to the Boys and Girls Clubs, providing gifts and presents for certain things. We call it the Caleb Cares Hero Award for people that change their attitude, their

mindset, all of that. The teachers or the helpers or TAs are showing or they tell us about their progress and things like that and then they get an award and they get some gifts or they get some beats or whatever it's been in the past. That's awesome. You don't beat up bullies You can't beat up bullies But if you ever get to a point we need us to ratio a bully we could do that online or We could drop a quick ratio on somebody to make a bully changes profile pick. Yeah, right sounds good. Yeah Yeah, that's another one

I wanted to bring up one story that I loved and like says what you are as a teammate and You know the media goes with all these different stories like I said I think two years being the number one pick yeah everyone's gonna poke holes yeah but you when you won the Heisman you brought your entire offensive line you demanded that they would come was there any pushback when they when you're like they're not going if I don't bring my guys well there was pushback I said I want to invite them and then there was pushback and then I, I'm not going unless. That's awesome. And then it ended up happening.

Yeah, and then I. And then we ended up having a great. It was like, I'll never forget that night. Because we all went and sat around. We ended up getting a suite after you win. You get a suite after you win the Heisman. And so we ended up going up to the suite. And we just, I mean, we had chicken fingers, pizza.

I mean, the big fingers pizza, I mean Yeah, the big man had beers and and drinks and stuff like that and we were just I mean we were we were having a blast Just sitting around a round table and just music laugh and joke and think about you know all the good times and having stories and stuff like that and just Enjoying enjoying each other. I love that because you know, there's I mean that's just that especially in a moment because I was reading the story that like all your offensive on me and like we don't know when we're gonna be all Together again, and we're just gonna enjoy this moment together hanging out getting room service. Yeah, like that's old-school fun Yeah, yeah, like so I yeah, I love that story. That's a great teammate. So I just wanted to highlight that stuff Yeah, how do you fly back with Heisman Trophy? Did you just bring it on it?

Did you know so they so so USC provide provided the private place? okay for that and then you know, we hopped on the private and and and It was sitting pretty in the private plane. Yeah, so I know that you've received I read that you've received a lot of media training So you're ready to to deal with the media that tries to get you to say stuff. I don't know if they prepared you for this question. All right. If there was a button, if you had a button,

and if you pushed it, one Bears fan would die. But you would win 10 Super Bowls. Do you press the button? You can kill me. What if it was me? You don't know which Bears fan's gonna die. One, just one. What do you know? You don't know. You don't know what's gonna die. One. Just one. Just 10 Super Bowls. 10. I do it. I feel like most bears fans would be like, I'll throw. I press the button for you. They sacrifice. Yeah. Wow. That's love. It is love.

So do you press the button? I think I'll take it. I'll take it. I'm saying I'll take it. I read your body language. body language pressing the button many times Yeah, yeah, you're getting 30 Super Bowl. Yeah To super bows that's a lot of Super Bowl. Yeah, that's that's that's great. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah All right. Well, I know we got to wrap up and we appreciate your time I have one last question, row back question. R-H-O-B-A-C-K.com promo code take. 20% off your first purchase, Q-zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts, rowback.com.

So I'm a big college football fan as well. And I had one very stupid question. Utah, can you tell the difference when it goes from day to night there? Because I have a theory that if Utah, like you tell me Utah's playing a game, you just tell me what time they're playing. Because if it's nighttime, I'm gonna bet on Utah.

If it's daytime, take the other team. And you had that one game where it was- Well, we started- Started in day. Started in day, ended in night. And you guys were awesome in the first half. We had two of them. Yeah, and it was just like-

Yeah, two. So can you feel the difference in that crowd? It's only, and there's always smoke in the difference in that crowd? It's only and there's always a crowd that that crowd was actually an awesome crowd. Love the love the stadium love all of that love the crowd. But man, I don't even they're tough football team. I mean, I don't know how we didn't win. Yeah, it was it got dark. Yeah, I mean, that's literally all it was. It was 12. After after after dark. Yeah, after dark. Yeah, it was it got dark. Yeah, I mean, that's literally all it was. It was packed 12 after after after dark. Yeah, after

dark. Yeah, it was it was tough. Yeah. Is it weird now that you're in Big 10 country and you're USC is going to come play? Yeah, it's weird. It's gonna be cool, though. Yeah, it'll be cool. Hopefully I can hopefully I can try and get to you know, that that first game if not, you know, they'll be around. Yeah, around here. Hopefully. Yeah. Well, Caleb, thank you so much. Awesome. Appreciate you. I wanted to say I love you. But that would be weird. Yeah, just met. No, Caleb, thank you so much. Awesome. Appreciate you. I wanted to say I love you, but that would be weird,

because we just met. No, it's all good. All right, I love you. I love you. All right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But no, seriously, thanks so much. And we're excited for this season.

Yeah, same here. And let us know if we can ever ratio someone for Caleb Coors. Yeah. We're ready to go. Appreciate it. Appreciate it. Thanks for having me. Much love.

And the Bears. Yeah. Yeah. Love it. Appreciate it. Thanks for having me. Much love and the bears. Yeah, yeah. Love it. Oh yeah. Caleb Williams is brought to you by Mountain Dew. We got our Mountain Dew fridge right here. Stocked. We got plenty stocked. We got all the flavors out on the table. Hank, what flavor are you drinking there? I'm drinking the OG. Just regular Mountain Dew. OG Mountain Dew. Big Cat's got an OG Mountain Dew. I love the OG Mountain Dew, Big Cat's got an OG Mountain Dew. I love the OG Mountain Dew. Actually, can you throw me another one?

Do the Dew. Hank, you wanna pass Big Cat an OG? Go for it, buddy. I love these cans. Cans are great. Just the color of them pops. The Code Red is aggressive. There's like a dragon, iguana type guy on here.

Code Red's the best. I love it. You guys love Mountain Dew. There's nothing else to say. You guys know Mountain Dew is great. We know Mountain Dew is great. And there's nothing like that refreshing citrus kick. Mountain Dew will get you off your ass and have you feeling like you're on an actual mountain. A mountain where the weather is always perfect and your friends are ready to hang. And a day of epic proportions awaits. We're here at Camp Barstool. We're going to be drinking Mountain Dew all week long, engaging in some outdoor activities, recreation, hitting up the lake, sharing a

cabin with the boys, playing some Wiffleball, playing some ultimate frisbee. We're gonna be playing some kickball and we're gonna be drinking a ton of Mountain Dew. The mountain's calling, you should answer. Grab your friends, grab an ice cold Mountain Dew, wherever refreshing beverages are sold and do the dew Okay, let's finish up the show. We got guys on chicks Hey boys long time AWO here congrats to pug on 98. That was electric. See how easy that was max Anyway, that was electric PFT what see how easy that was

Yeah, I'm beyond impressed with Pug shout out the one guy who said that he had been picking 98 for an entire year because of Connor Bidard when the Blackhawks got Connor Bidard and he's like all it took was Pug to pick it once and we're back. Like, he's fucking, the guy's just, he's magic. Pug is magic. Anyway, any advice on asking a guy out? There's this guy in my apartment complex that I'm borderline obsessed with and I'm curious whether he's interested. We've hung out a few times walking our dogs and getting drinks with mutual friends but never one on one. Should I just assume that if he was interested, he would just ask me

out and accept it's never going to happen. No, that's not how it works. No, we're stupid. Right now, the guy is probably leaving a voicemail for another podcast asking whether or not he should ask you out. Yeah, so on life advice right now. Here's the thing. Just ask him out.

Yeah, I don't know a single guy that's intimidated or has like a turnoff to a woman asking them out. If he's interested in you and you ask him out, then it's actually the best thing that could ever happen to him. What's going through his brain right now is, uh, there's a cute, uh, neighbor of mine who I walk dogs with and we've had some beers and I really want to ask her out, but I'm super afraid that if I ask her out and she says, no, it's going to be awkward every time I see her. That's, that's exactly what's going through his brain every day when he wakes up.

So if you just ask him out, you're good. Yep. And then when you guys break up, one of you will have to move because that will be the awkward time. Yeah. But you'll, you know, have some fun in between. Dogs become friends. Oh, then you gotta explain. Don't get a third dog. No. Then you'd have to figure out who gets the third dog when you break up. Yeah. And it will be a messy breakup. It also matters if you live on the same floor, I think. Yeah. Oh Oh even messier. Yeah Hey PMT boys

I went to a college party last weekend of school in May the last weekend of school in May Me and this guy had a lot of fun dancing and hanging out there He brought us he bought us an uber back to his place, but he threw up in the uber into the trash sack I wanted to go back to his apartment, but he said he's too fucked up and unable to perform Do you think he was lying to me or is that true? I don't it's definitely true. That's definitely also credit to this woman. She shared an Uber back with the guy he puked in the Uber. Yeah. And then she was like, you want to go fool around? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, that's a real one right there. Yeah. I mean, he's he was just so bombed that. Wow. And then she's like, Do you think he was faking it? Yeah. Imagine if the guy could puke on command just to get out of hookup, bad hookups.

Yeah, I'll take the $500 cleaning charge. Actually, you know what? Now that you're saying it. Yeah, he was faking it. He faked the whole thing. You got to think about something else Okay sub dad cat Jinko man and bell ringer My husband is not a football guy and loves museums and art fairs with a particular interest in modern art He'll watch football with me and scroll his phone Come that getting a call. Sorry

Doesn't particularly enjoy it. And when we get together with friends to watch a game at a house or bar, it's pretty awkward because he doesn't understand the lingo of rules. Is there any hope you will come around? No, it sounds like you just have an art guy. Yeah, this is. This is like, remember when we went to dinner, PFT, we might have told the story.

And there was we went to dinner with a friend and he invited the guy who wrote the music to succession. Yeah. And there was a moment during dinner where I actually I felt like an idiot, but I was like, hey, man, can I ask you a question? Like, it's kind of a weird question. He's like, yeah. What do you do on Sundays? And he was like, what do you mean? And then he explained like, yeah, I just go to the park or in like he lives a regular day. And it just was it's so foreign to me. Like, what do you imagine happening? Having your full weekend clear every single weekend.

He's productive. He actually he does things to some of himself. Yeah. But even summer, I mean, there's still some sports. But yeah, yeah, I guess it's summer. Yeah. But imagine having that all year round There's a very bizarre feeling like you You'd have all you get all the stuff done around your house. Yeah, go do things. Well, listen Admiring art isn't that different? From watching football. Yeah, hear me out you you spend all day you pay like

$15 you go to a big building, and then you look at a screen on the wall. And then that screen makes you feel emotions. Not only that, that's exactly what I do every single Sunday. Add to that. A lot of times when you go to the museum, you get the headset and someone's explaining the art to you. Yeah, exactly. So you complimentary piece, you've got like a play by play guy, right for the art, right. And it makes you

feel angry. Sometimes. Other times it makes you feel happy. Other times it makes you feel like you want to get into a fight with another guy that's in the art museum. Yeah. And then you go to the gift shop, which is similar to when we order like $500 worth of wings and pizza. Yeah. Or you buy like, yeah, you're getting like your your fifth, like on field replica jersey. Yeah, for your favorite team. Yeah, that's what you're getting when you get like on field replica jersey yeah for your favorite team yeah that's what you're getting when you get the Rembrandt calendar right it's actually the same

thing as being a sports fan yeah okay hank last one hey pmt boys my boyfriend is a longer time listener and i've gradually become a reluctant fan of your show whoa whoa there's a lot of qualifiers in that sentence right chill out when my boyfriend gets drunk He will often eat whatever is available most recently pulled out five tortillas I made a bunch of quesadillas, but he also included mayo and peanut butter along with the cheese I find this disgusting but wanted to get your thoughts. What has been your train is drunk food creation I mean, that's that's not that mayo and peanut butter together's gross. Yeah, but I'll stand on that I I would agree.

But with cheese, putting yourself into into a drunk person's mindset where you just take anything that you see and put together like I've heard worse. Yeah. He probably likes mayo and peanut butter. And he was just like, oh, let's just play the hits.

How many times have you I was very I never did like the a ton of crazy ones is just usually just a frozen pizza. How many frozen pizzas have you guys burned to almost burning your house down? I can think of three times. I was going to say seven. I can think of a few.

Yeah, I once I once I was drunk with a pizza in there. It's just a brick when you wake up. I used to keep my like buns and like bread in my stove in my old apartment, so I didn't have like a lot of space. Yeah. And I accidentally I have like a lot of space. And I accidentally, I thought I took them all out. I left one in there and then like lit an entire bag. With the plastic?

Yeah. Oh no. It was bad. That's a bad place to keep plastic. Yeah, it's bad. That's so great. That's a great Hank story. I wish I had heard that before.

What I used to do was I used to just go into my closet and add chips. Like I would always get like the flaming hot chips or the Takis. And I would add those to just anything if I like leftover fried rice from a restaurant. Guess what makes it better? Put some flaming hot Doritos in there. Yeah, I would leave the stove on once a week in college. Like my it became a thing that like my roommates had to had to

be there when I was using the stove because they knew I was going to leave it on every time. Yeah, I know I wasn't even drunk either. That was just like I would cook something and then leave the stove on. Yeah. Yeah. Well, it's you were just yours.

I was just dumb. Well, all right. Hold on to back you up. It was obviously if it was a college apartment. It was the coils. No, it was one of the electric ones, but it wouldn't be red. Yeah, that's not your fault. The coils are like, you leave those on.

You can see the fire. I couldn't see the fire. Yeah, if it's an open flame one, if it's a burner, then you're an idiot. Anything else, I have your back. Yeah. All right, good show, boys. Hard knocks.

That was fun. Yeah. Holy shit. Thank you, also. Any other. That was fun. Yeah. Holy shit. Thank you. Also, any of the AWLs that didn't spoil it after I accidentally said it on Donnie's live stream at like 11 AM today. So good job. It's been, uh, it's been cool seeing, seeing part of my take, make it to the big screen again. Yeah. This podcast might actually work out as a TV show. No, as just a podcast.

All right. Let's kick it back to ourselves for lottery balls. Okay, let's wrap up the show. We're back in studio for numbers. Pug, can he do it? Three in a row. First ever three, Pete. Pug, you gotta go first. I think I'm gonna go 97, Pug. Wow, you crazy bastard.

You are a fucking psycho. Maybe work my way wait Hank's mic's not on Hank's mic's not on this is good yeah that's part of the show you're good what are you gonna say hey I kind of had my first line was it was a killer line yeah I just pretend just pretend hey pug guy you go first Think I'm gonna go with 97. Oh, you're sick. Do you think that just going down in order is gonna work? I Mean that was a good line. Yeah Wait was that because that was your strategy at one point, but you put pug won't miss numbers True. He's just gonna get them all pugs is better. Yeah, pugs a better

numbers. True. He's just gonna get them all. Pugs is better. Yeah. Pugs a better. He's a better human being and dog than all of us. Yeah. I'll go 20. I'll go back to eight. Pug might be a better picker of numbers than human. I don't know. He's a better dog than pick. I mean, he's the lead at picking numbers. He's he's a very great humor or human. We love him but he's not. He's not. Is he elite human we love him, but He's not that's not is he elite I Think he's probably the best on this show. Yeah by far Thanks guys. That means a lot hook see what a good guy all right. What's your number 70s?

70 70 you try to pick all the 70s? 70s. Max, have you ever gotten the lottery ball? I've gotten the number. Love you guys. I'm just saying I'd say it anyway Today's a lovely day to find you Shine away, I'll be coming for your love again Shine away, I'll be coming for your love again So let me go, let me take on the way So let me go, let me take on the way So let me go, let me take on the way So let me go, let me take on the way I'll be your new day, oh

So let me go, let me go I'll be your new day, oh So needless to say, I won't say it But I'll be your new day, oh I'm coming for you anyway You shine in my life I'm coming for you anyway You shine in my life I'm coming for you anyway You shine in my life I'm coming for you anyway You shine in my life

I'm coming for you anyway You shine in my life I'm coming for you anyway You shine in my life I'm coming for you anyway You shine in my life Just to play my memories away You are the things I've got to remember In a shining light I'll be coming for you anyway In a shining light

I'll be coming for you anyway Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me I'll be your beauty Take on me

Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me I'll be your beauty Take on me Take on me Take on me

Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Take on me Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,