Pardon My Take - Chicago Bulls’ Alex Caruso, The A’s Moving To Sacramento, Stefon Diggs Traded And Tiger Stopped Having Sex
Episode Date: April 5, 2024The NCAA is trying to screw UConn (00:00:00-00:04:50). The A’s are moving to Sacramento and Big Cat has an offer for John Fisher (00:04:50-00:10:04). Stefon Diggs traded and Tiger is swearing off se...x for the Masters (00:10:04-00:29:20). We make picks for the weekend before we head to Phoenix (00:29:20-00:37:56). Bulls Guard Alex Caruso joins the show to talk about his incredible journey to the NBA, the bubble championship and should it count, how insanely good everyone in the NBA is at offense, Lebron reading the Godfather and more (00:37:56-01:47:31). We finish with Fyre Fest of the week (01:47:31-02:02:32).You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake
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Hey, pardon my take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple podcasts, Spotify or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad free on Amazon Music.
On today's pardon my take, we have Chicago Bulls guard Alex Crusoe in studio.
Awesome interview with Alex Crusoe.
I've been a long time coming.
A great talk with him about the NBA, little March Madness
talk. Awesome time with him. We're going to get a lot of stuff we got to get to. The A's
are officially going to Sacramento. The NCAA is trying to stop Yukon from getting to Phoenix.
We have the Stefan Diggs trade and we have FireFest. We got a lot to get to on a Friday
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Okay, let's go. and then a lot of work to be done no place to hang out or wash in
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Today is Friday, April 5th, and the NCAA is trying to screw the Connecticut Huskies.
They're doing everything they can.
The Huskies were delayed on the tarmac.
They had a plane issue, or not on the tarmac.
There was a plane that was coming in from Kansas City.
Yes.
It got delayed.
Yukon didn't get out to Arizona until early this morning three four in the morning
Yeah, so they're doing it mayor Pete. He's an Indiana guy. Maybe he's thinking throw the Huskies off Purdue
They beat him in the championship
I don't know
There's a lot of stuff a lot of stuff going on with the NCAA going after you come but fortunately for Danny Hurley
He now has the fuel wouldn't shock me if Danny Hurley actually delayed that flight. Yeah false flag
So therefore he could complain about this, but whatever it is. They've got motivation It wouldn't shock me if Danny Hurley actually delayed that flight. Yeah. False flag.
So therefore he could complain about this.
But whatever it is, they've got motivation.
They fucked with the Huskies.
I know people like, oh, well, it's two days ahead.
That's when that's the most important sleep.
This is the sleep before the most important sleep, isn't it?
I think it's, I think it's so Jack Mack, our colleague, talked to a sleep expert and said
that when you go through time zones, it's a day per time zone, so three days to get feeling good,
and they got there Thursday morning, so they won't feel good until probably Sunday.
Okay, because Jim Harbaugh's stance is that it's the night before the night before.
Right.
Right?
So this would be the night before the night before the night before, but you can't get
a good night's sleep the night before, the night before if you got
all fucked up in your head the night before, the night before, the night before.
It's messed up.
Yeah.
It's messed up.
They're trying to take down the Huskies.
But yeah, we're getting ready for the final four.
We're going to be there in Arizona.
So we will be on location.
We'll be at the game on Saturday night.
We're going to be doing a watch party on Monday night.
Are you excited, Hank?
Super excited.
How many golf games you got planned?
Just one.
Just playing them all.
Just one.
We're going to top golf too.
That's for work though.
Yep.
Have to do that.
Have to do that.
And we were talking about maybe squeezing in the Tiger Woods putt putt thing that he
has out there.
That's more like location scout.
Yeah.
Or maybe something in the future.
Who knows? Oh, and we're also talking about invited to that. When we, we have, we haven't locked
it in. Jeff D. Lowe hit me up. Oh, okay. We're also talking about maybe doing a par three,
but that's not golf. No, it's not locked in. Well, neither is top golf. It's golf, but
it's not, it's not golf, but it is golf. It is golf. Yeah. So we're going to be excited.
We'll be out there. We'll get, we'll get to our picks in a minute Let's talk about some other things
The Oakland Athletics have officially announced that they're moving to Sacramento temporarily
Yeah for I think what is it three years and then fourth year option something like that
Yeah, so we got we got all types of scumbags
We got to go through for this we you guys have heard us talk about how much we hate John Fisher that fucking idiot
John Fisher got in front of the people of Sacramento and
Said that he is very excited to be able to watch some of the greatest players in baseball
Whether they be athletics players or Aaron judge and others. Mm-hmm. This fucking dude doesn't know anyone on his team
No, he doesn't he just wants he's he's selling the idea of good baseball players will play here. Also the athletics that I own will be here. And it's
what a 10,000 seat stadium? 15, I think he said it's the most intimate environment in
baseball. Yeah. So it's, it's official. The grounds crew, I think in, in the Coliseum
didn't find, they found out via Twitter. Uh, this was obviously like it felt like it was
going to happen. And then it happened officially on Thursday.
We also had Vivek, the owner of the Kings, total scumbag as well because he bought the
Kings to keep the Kings in Sacramento, which was an admirable move. And now he's just basically
laundering the aides for them and being like, yeah, we'll take you for a few years.
To halfway home before you go to Vegas.
He also had a quote, Vivek, when I bought the Kings,
I said that Sacramento would never play second fiddle
to any other city.
That makes no sense.
You're literally playing second fiddle to Las Vegas.
And Oakland.
And Oakland.
He's playing third fiddle.
You're getting a temporary team.
Yeah.
It's just a who's who cast of characters of people that you should all hate and it's ridiculous the way this has been handled from start to finish. Obviously, it's been a clusterfuck. But the fact that they have to find a stadium to move to before they move to their new stadium is absurd. Right. So like just find a place that you can crash at essentially for and it's not just for a season. That's what's crazy like they're gonna be doing they're gonna be doing this for multiple years staying in
Sacramento all the while trying to design a stadium which actually hasn't
been designed yet correct in Las Vegas it's it's a bad look for baseball I'm
gonna I'm gonna say bad look for baseball bad look for Rob Manford but
bad look for Rob Manford bad look for Vivek the owner of the Kings who again
like the hypocrisy of being like we we're not going to let someone come in and take the Kings and then just being
the handoff for the A's.
Yeah.
Total bullshit.
So, unfortunately, it feels like this is all going to happen whether we make a stink of
them and we're small, a small, small piece of all this.
It's obviously the city of Oakland.
Our goal should just be for the rest of time is just to remind people that John Fisher is a fucking coward,
scumbag, loser.
Yeah, I'm okay with doing that.
And they also, they have locked their, uh, their tweets so you can't reply. They did
that a while ago.
Yeah.
But to tweet out being like, we're going to Sacramento and no one can reply. You're cowards.
You're cowards and you're losers and you know what
John Fisher you're rich dude why don't you have hair that's a good point you fucking
idiot is very very ball you like this is where we got to take it I think we just got to take
it to the personal level and just be like John Fisher bro you can't fucking you you
can't get money for a new stadium and you can't get hair yeah John Fisher your family
owned the gap then it looks like your your own the Gap right now, bro.
Get a dentist.
Oh, shit.
Why don't you go to Aaron Judge's favorite player.
Sean Ortho.
I also didn't realize.
I was reading up more about John Fisher.
He bought a piece of the Giants back in the 90s
to keep the Giants in San Francisco.
Yeah, he bought the Giants.
And then he said, you know what? I'm going to buy the A's so
that I can make money. It's a classic case of a guy wanting to prove that he can make money,
but the only way he knows how to make money on his own without mom and dad holding his hand
is to take mom and dad's money and then buy a guaranteed asset that's going to increase no
matter how bad you fuck it up. And then you can say, look, I made something to myself.
It's a classic feel fucking loser
And I guarantee you like he should he should have to be quizzed on his entire roster because there's no way
He knows his entire roster and I wouldn't be shocked if he also thinks Brad Pitt works in his facility
Yeah, where's Jonah Hill? Mm-hmm. Well, I haven't seen him in a while. Yeah, it's it's a sad state of affairs Major League Baseball right now
And there's nothing you can do about it except say John Fisher's a fucking loser for and has no hair from now until the end
Of time you can remind him that he's bald. Yes. Guess what that ain't coming back come on the podcast though
We won't ask any bald questions. I'll ask one actually, you know what John Fisher cuz you're such a broke boy
I will pay for your hair restoration. Mmm, if you come on the podcast, so make that a quote card John Fisher
It should say John Fisher because you're a bald fuck
Big cat will pay for your hair restoration
For one appearance on part of my take. I think that's a fair deal
That's a fair deal because he's bald take it because he's bald you bald bitch you alopecia
No here having bitch. How much does that cost a lot like 50 grand? He's really bald so probably a lot
Yeah, but all that money's tied up in a suit wasn't even that good you own the gas guy do a security deposit
It's kind of like baggy look like shit the collar was bad. Yeah, the collar was bad
All-time collar collar was bad. Okay other things we got to talk about
All-time caller. Caller was bad.
OK, other things we've got to talk about.
Stefan Diggs was traded from Buffalo.
Yeah, I think that this is probably
something that had to happen.
I would say so.
So he was not happy at the end of last season.
He was not happy during last season, or really ever,
it feels like, in Buffalo.
I think he started not being happy.
It was like the playoff loss to the Bengals.
Yeah.
It was like basically an entire year of not being happy.
Yeah, so he's unhappy.
He had to leave town.
He's making a bunch of money.
So they traded him to the Texans.
The Texans gave up a second round pick in next year's draft.
Yep.
But they also took three years off his contract, I believe.
Yep.
So he's going to be a free agent.
It's a one-year rental for Stephon Diggs.
Maybe it's coming home.
I do love this move for the Texans. I think it's love this move for the Texans.
I think it's a genius move for the Texans.
They are basically going all in under CJ Stroud's rookie contract.
This is what a team should do.
Yeah.
Like if you're Texans fans, you should be really pumped, especially because CJ Stroud's
not a... If they were drafting a quarterback, like, do you really want Stefan Diggs with
a rookie quarterback?
That feels like a problem because let's just be honest Stefan Diggs is
An awesome football player, but if you get traded twice in your prime there might be it might be you yeah
It might be you this is also a great business move on on Stefan Diggs's part because he's going to get to be a free agent
Again, yeah, he's gonna get paid again
And it's good if you're a texans fan too because going to this offseason you were probably thinking like best-case scenario
We get maybe T Higgins
Yeah, if he doesn't get tagged T Higgins gets tagged and you're like well fuck that was kind of the big name that was out
There now you got a better player than T Higgins and they have an awesome receiving court. They're all in I mean the
I just love that a team is being proactive with the fact that like CJ Stroud outside of Mahomes is probably the most valuable quarterback in the NFL next year. The guy
that you would want to build around the most. Well not even not even like
talent wise Mahomes is Mahomes because he's Mahomes like you can just win with
Mahomes no matter what but I'm saying like CJ Stroud talent plus contract yeah
is is is probably number two if you had to pick a quarterback in all contracts matter
You'd still take my homes one even though he's getting a lot of money
I think you probably take CJ shroud too because you're like, oh I can build everything else up and
We have three years four years here where he's not gonna get paid this max money
It also marks a very big change in the the Houston Texans philosophy for years. They were great at drafting
They've always drafted great players,
but then they trade their players.
Or they let them go.
They never really bring in big name outside free agents.
This is now like a complete 180 turnaround
from what the Texans have done.
It feels like for the last 10 years.
So they're actually going out there.
They are being proactive.
They got Mixnet running back, right?
Who I guess, that's fine.
I think he's a pretty good running back.
And then you got.
Nico Collins.
Nico Collins, Tank Dell.
Tank Dell.
And Stefan Diggs.
A defense that's young and getting better.
Credit to Nick Casario.
Good job, Nick.
I'm talking myself into the Texans.
Yeah, well, that's the other thing is now we have,
we know who the team is going to be this off season.
Yeah.
Where it's the trendy pick of a team that they're going to say like, who's
your dark horse? The Texans? They shouldn't be a dark horse.
They should be they should be a pale horse. They should be like
the team that everybody should be focusing on. But everyone's
going to talk this off season. Like my surprise pick for next
year is the Houston Texans. Yeah. And now for the Bills, the
Bills are not better without Stefan Diggs. That's just a
fact. Like they're not a better football team when Stefan Diggs is not on their team.
But they had to do something not only because Stefan Diggs, but they've been in a cap hell
where they went all in the last few years.
And even that chief, the chiefs have rebuilt on the fly with Mahomes and got younger.
The Bills were very old roster, had to make some tough decisions, had to cut some players, had to trade Stefan Diggs. I know people will get
upset about this but I still think that if you have Josh Allen you still have a
shot. Yeah I know and people like this is so stupid but like that they when you
have a franchise quarterback you have to reset and overturn your roster a couple
times over. The Bills should be criticized for going all in with this
older team that wasn't able to win a Super Bowl. But now this is the reality. They have to
hit their hard reset. They have to make some tough decisions. They can't miss on the draft,
but that's just the reality of it. And even still, if you're a Bills fan, as doom and
gloom as it might seem to trade Stefan Diggs, you have Josh Allen. And if you draft well,
you'll still have a shot.
Yeah, so with Josh Allen, he's probably gonna be running the ball a lot at the start of
next year until he can like establish who his receivers are, who he trusts.
Maybe Gabe Davis, maybe he plays every game like he's playing-
Not on the Bills anymore.
Not on the Bills anymore.
Fuck, okay, so-
You knew that.
I did know that, but he basically wasn't on the Bills for 75% of the game for that season
too.
Yeah, that's true. I think it's Shakir is their number one right now.
Okay, so they...
Well, and they also have, they still have Dalton Kincaid and Dawson Knox.
That's true.
They've got...
Curtis Samuel and Matt Collins.
Curtis Samuel's nice if you like doing pop passes and reverses and shit like that.
They draft 28th, so I don't know if they're going to look to add a wide receiver.
It is a deep wide receiver class.
Yeah.
Polk from Washington, he'll be there. I don't know, it's just like, it add a wide receiver. It is a wide receiver class. Yeah. Polk from Washington.
He'll be there.
I don't know.
It's just like, it's one of those, it's a hard reality.
It sucks if you're a Bills fan because Stefan Diggs didn't work out, but I think he had
to move on because it was not tenable.
And now you have to be like, all right, here comes the hard reset.
Here comes a couple of years where Josh is going to have to be superhero.
And hopefully they're able to nail some draft picks and get a young
roster around Josh Allen who will still play for a long time.
And getting a second round pick next year is not bad.
No.
Like that's a decent haul.
There's not very many players outside of quarterbacks that would be worth a first round pick.
The only issue is they probably waited to a point where it was clear that they needed
to get rid of Stefan Diggs so their hands were tied a little bit.
Like it was clear they had, like you never want to be in a negotiating spot where everyone's like,
oh, they really don't want him on the team anymore.
Maybe a deal that should have been done last year, one year too late, when you still had
a Gabe Davis on your team.
Maybe bring Cole Beasley back.
I don't know.
I feel like Bills fans understand the reality of it that this is what happens when you have
to pay your
All-world quarterback. Yep, and now you now you got to start making some good moves and some cheap moves and and hopefully guys step up I'd say it's a it's a win-win for both teams
I did you just I just think Stefan Diggs was like he was cause it like we talked about the diva receivers
He's number one right now. Yeah, the Instagram king. Instagram complete.
There's so many players. I'd never understand why players do this. Why they like post something
extremely inflammatory on social media on Instagram on like their story and then they
delete it after like an hour. Yeah. And then they act like it didn't happen. Yeah. Oh yeah.
I don't know what you're talking about. Yeah. I didn't know my phone got hacked. Yeah. It
was good though to see a big NFL trade. Yeah. Never happens. Flowing. Never happened. They
did. They did. The Bills did sign Leo Collins.
So that was nice.
Okay, cool, cool.
Someone to protect the jet.
Cool, cool.
Yeah, good, good.
But you know what I'm saying, like Josh is probably,
over the course of last year,
he started to run the ball more,
and their offense, they started to win games.
Yeah.
When they kind of played into those strengths.
I think he's gonna go back to that
at the start of next year,
especially if he doesn't have these dynamic downfield receivers. So it is funny though,
watching some fan bases be like, that's the death of the Bills. I think that it's as long as you
have a, if you have a top five quarterback team, you're never dead. And I think the,
because my homes is so great, everyone behind my homes gets diminished to a point where you're
like, I think a lot of teams would still want Josh Allen. I want to start keeping track too of all the teams that go all in and still end up losing
to Mahomes.
Yeah, he's the thief of joy.
He's the thief of joy.
There are going to be so many teams that go all in.
They're like, now's our chance.
That's the last-
And then Mahomes just keeps beating them.
Yeah, that's the last level of greatness.
Being great is one thing, but then when you get to that last level of greatness, Brady,
Mahomes, MJ in the 90s where it's like you can actually point and be like, he took at least
a couple of Super Bowls from this guy.
Yeah.
Like, Peyton Manning would probably have three Super Bowls if it wasn't for, or four Super
Bowls if it wasn't for Tom Brady.
Yeah, the Niners, they were all in.
Yeah.
Stole their joy.
Texans are going to try to go all in.
Seems like there's a lot of teams out there the Ravens
Dolphins the Ravens have been all in although they lost a lot in free agencies. Yeah, they'll go on again
Yeah, they'll figure out a way to go all in the Chargers
All in the Bears are gonna go all in you see Cale Williams was in Chicago Bears are kind of all in you
He went out to dinner. He went out to dinner with some players. You stopped by the facility
I heard yeah, so be funny if they didn't him. If they're like we didn't like his order.
I mean I'm gonna paint my nails for draft night so if he doesn't if we don't draft him
that's gonna be a problem. Yeah no you guys are gonna draft him. That's gonna be a real
problem for your boy. It's gonna go Williams number one and then who knows. Now we're in
the the thick of mock draft season where people are doing new mock drafts just so that they
can have a different quarterback going at number two. Yeah. So people will click on it and then they'll change it again right before the draft
Are you a little worried about changing Daniel's elbow?
It's he's got a freaky fucking elbow. I think is weird. He's got it. He's got like a three inch protrusion on his elbow
Well, I was fine. Is it elbow important for a quarterback?
I know not the bursitis that he has so
Obviously I did a deep dive on what the fuck is on his elbow
Because if that if I'm gonna be rooting for that elbow I want to know what's going on
You're gonna have to get intimate with that elbow. I might have to just hit my elbow like you're painting your nails
Yeah, I might just bash my elbow against it take a hammer to your elbow until I get a dick that grows out of the arm
No, you can't you can't be nervous. I'm not nervous. He's fine. Yeah, everyone says it's fine. It's fine. It's completely normal elbow
It's fine. It's a fine-looking elbow. It's a good elbow Hank. So it's a coincidence that it's throwing arm
If you might end up with Jaden Daniel, yes bursitis. I'm trying to find out more
I didn't understand like it seems read a book Hank's bursitis, dude
How does one acquire bursitis by being too good at quarterback and winning a high throwing too much but it's not a concern by dominating people yeah you
got to get rid of it by throwing less what happens if it gets worse oh wait so
wait Hank so the other quarterbacks in this draft the one that you're looking
at right now we're looking at Drake Drake may all you're looking at do they do
they have bursitis no it sounds like they don't throw footballs that much
Jane Daniels has bursitis because he practices so hard. Yeah
That's a guy I wanted my to act. Yeah, I'm not gonna bash him
I hope we get him so the new money ball is drafting a quarterback with a fucked-up elbow that looks like a modern art sculpture
Mm-hmm. Did you guys see?
Harbaugh strength and conditioning coach who is a Badger Ben Herbert. Yeah, see his
his Pre-gir introductory press conference. No. Oh my god
I'll just play one little clip from it because it it made me want I actually think that we should hire a strength and conditioning
Coach here like I kind of want someone to come and like kick my ass, but let me let me play this one clip
On and a get-back guy that just holds mincy off from stepping in for cameras
Yeah, all right here. It is. This is philosophy stopping him from having conversations in the office
This fire you up training is that I don't know if there's two people that view it the same
There are concepts that different people believe in that may match up
But I view training in this way and this is how I told it to the guys
My first goal is to make you harder to break.
Yep. That's it. People often make you harder to break.
This was also a great quote from, uh, from Harbaugh today. So he said,
the back is just an untapped gold mine of lean muscle mass. Ooh, I like that.
I love that too. Uh, it does sound like he's looking at players,
like he wants to eat them.
Like he's evaluating a cut of venison.
Yeah.
Like that's such a gold mine.
I'd like to sink my teeth into that.
But his whole point is that if you have a strong back,
it supports your neck.
That's what-
And then your neck supports your brain.
Yeah, Ben Herbert said that the first thing I showed them
was trap exercises to support their brain.
He also talked about emotional
Like intelligence and I just love this is the most like intense dude ever. Here's what he said
He's happy he's excited well then it rains and I feel a certain type of way or I
Told the guys I have a wife two boys two dogs. I have a car with four tires if I get a certain type of way or I told the guys I have a wife, two boys, two dogs. I have a car with four tires. If I get a flat tire,
I'm not going to take it out on you. If something happens,
I don't change emotionally when I walk in the facility,
who you know me to be is who I am. Same guy all the time. Yeah.
Doesn't matter if his wife's mad at him. Yeah. And just so we're clear,
he's got two dogs, two kids, wife mm-hmm right the same level all those matter
Just the same exact and he's also tougher than the weather
Yeah, he's like if it rains. I'm not gonna
I don't know anyone who's tougher than the weather if it's if it's shitty out your you feel shitty
He's tougher than the weather. I like that. He's gonna be a force
I can't wait for hard bought to just do his press conferences just we get all of hardball NFL content all the time
Because he doesn't have to be as careful too. He doesn't I hope he cheats too
I hope he brings some of that extra spy shit to the NFL. Yeah
All right. Last thing I had was Tiger Woods isn't having sex
Isn't that what you'd say if you were having a lot of sex? Well at first the headline was like Tiger
What was the actual headline? Because it looked like from his friend. It looked like Tiger Woods penis actually wrote the story
So he's focusing on winning the Masters by not having said Tiger was his eliminated sex while training for the Masters
It's until only recently that golfers have even started having sex
Back in the 90s golfers were nerds isn't this
But didn't Tiger win when he was having sex
That was when he was Tiger Tiger was at his best when his he heard his back
Yeah, that was also cuz he tried to be a Navy SEAL
But he also got his back blown out that too, but Tiger was winning championships
He was winning majors when his when like the the grip of his putter smelled like absolute shit from his hands. Perkins waitresses.
The dirtier Tiger was, the better.
He was getting it in the hole.
Now he's gonna not do, maybe he just can't have sex because he can't walk.
Maybe.
There's always like, before the World Cup, there's always one Brazilian soccer manager
that says like, I've had my guys not having sex for three months now.
They're ready to go. I feel like, I've had my guys not having sex for three months now. Yeah, they're ready to go. I feel like I don't have tiger. I want tiger to be competitive.
But if he doesn't play well, after he spent the entire like month not having sex, he's
going to have so much sex. Yeah, next masters eliminating sex. So it just feels like the
wrong thing for tiger to do. He needs to he needs to be having sex. I had the Tiger.
I want my Tiger fucking. Yeah. I want him just loose.
Yeah and the more he fucks, the more Charlie Woodses we have.
Who's next up? Next up.
Next up. Alright, do we have anything else before we talk maybe little picks on Final
Four? Any other stories going around?
Congrats to the Celtics for winning the Eastern Conference.
That officially happened? Now that the Knicks have.
Yeah, we clinched the best record in the NBA.
Nice. Yeah.
Julius Randall not going to play anymore this year.
So I think they were about 50.
There were about 500 with him out of the lineup.
But people were saying if he comes back, they could be the ones
that could threaten the Celtics in the East.
So who is this exactly?
Julius Randall maybe also just was like, I don't want to last year went so bad yeah maybe I just don't want to deal
with this yeah there's just nobody in the East at all am I am I somebody
getting it back oh oh somebody else came what do you think about Joel and bead
wearing Skechers max who cares are sneakers okay all right you want your
guy wearing the best gear. I want my guy
Well supported from whatever company will support him the best, okay?
Sketchers just doesn't seem like Like that's a skateboarding brand. No. Yeah, you can think that I
Will you think that yeah, you're entitled to your own opinion. He came back
Sixers without maxi
Beat the Thunder they were without she goesikah Alexander, but Sixers are back.
Okay.
By the way, Max, I forgot to say congratulations to the Villanova women for finishing third
in the NIT.
Second.
No, WBIT.
Oh.
WBIT.
So it actually doesn't count as a real second because it was not even the second tournament.
No, that is the second.
Well, we had a debate.
There's a WNIT and a WBIT. The W't know what the one is. Yes, we do the WB IT is better
In the second place turn yes, you finished second in the second place tournament, correct? Wow, like this is what?
Yes, you're just a walk. Yeah, you're just
It's kind of like when you buy a car and then all of a sudden you see your car
everywhere. You're like, oh man, I didn't know how many people had this car. As soon
as Max finished second once, we just started noticing it's like, he finishes second everywhere.
All the time.
Everywhere. Like anywhere you look, he's finishing second.
That's a bad example because when you buy a car and you notice that car everywhere,
it's not like there's a ton of those cars. It's just that you notice them more. It's
like the whatever kind of bias that is. With with max it really just opened her eyes to it
Yeah, and then people were all like the little league video. I we put out the other day. I finished second in that oh no
People were reminding me of that the other day. Yeah
David Buster's commercial we did yes second yeah
science fair finished second.
Fuck.
Hey memes, do we have a-
I was excited for that second.
Do we have an update on Mr. Pear?
People want the Mr. Pear, we want Mr. Pear bad.
Yeah, I'm gonna try to get it next week.
Okay, him, get him.
Not it.
I'm either getting a tortoise
that we're just gonna call a turtle.
Here's what I'm worried about with the tortoise though memes.
I'm told that tortoises can live like 20, 30 years.
Yeah, but they're...
I would feel bad if a turtle, tortoise, excuse me,
died after like six months
if its lifespan was supposed to be 30.
That was my number one
worry about this from the start.
Yeah, now if it's just a turtle
and it does bad, we'll rip that shit up
like, what was the turtle that was at Florida State?
Turntle? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, We'll tear that turtle in half if he stinks.
Turntle got ripped in half by what was it? Aguayo. Aguayo brothers. Yeah. Yeah.
One of the Aguayos. So you're going to get it next week? I'm going to try to get
it next week. Maybe make a master. So that means we're not going to get it next
week. But yeah. Wait. So you're going to get a tortoise, or what's the other option?
I was speaking to a zookeeper.
He said get a box turtle.
They're easier to take care of.
And will a box turtle actually make picks for us?
Think so.
It eats pears.
It does eat pears.
That's good.
Mr. Pear.
Oh, Mr. Pear.
Mr. Pear.
We could just make the longest videos of him, like,
walking around the studio.
Yeah.
Where are you going, Mr. Pear?
He's gonna be a superstar. Yeah.
I just love the idea of us just doing the entire weekend preview,
and Mr. Pear is like,
oh, he just made his second pick after 45 minutes.
That's what we should do, too, with Mr. Pear,
is we shouldn't be like, Mr. Pear has to do five picks. Mr. Pear should just get to do too with Mr. Pairs. We shouldn't be like Mr. Pairs
has to do five picks. Mr. Pairs should just get to do as many picks as he can do. You
know what I mean? Let's not put so much pressure on Mr. Pairs.
Maybe he just likes one game.
Yeah. We'll just give him the option.
Yeah. Mr. Pairs game of the week.
Yeah. Mr. Pairs. And what are we going to put? We're going to put Pairs out for him
to eat or remotes?
Uh, I think pears. Okay
No chewing gum Mr. Pear. No, okay. I can't wait for mr. Pear. All right, let's uh, let's do some picks for Final Four. So
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What are we guys feeling? What are we guys feeling? I love, I love Yukon.
I already, I, there, there will be no bet on that game for me because I have you con and I want so much
I want to elect to abstain from
From betting on Purdue NC State. Hmm. I'll put it that way the DJ burn shirts
We just put on sailors are so far that I have to bet
NC State money line. Yeah, I have no choice
You know what fucking rooting for Purdue is just so so it's so fun to root against them
I just have to do it
So the reason why I wanted to abstain look at these is I am so convinced that
Zack Edie is just gonna have his way with NC State, but I'm also very stupid
So since I'm so sure that Purdue is gonna dominate I should just bet on NC State
Yeah, I just don't know how you can't like if you if you're impartial, if you don't have a team or bet
on this Final Four, the answer has to be NC State.
Like, you have to.
And they're perfect because the 83 title run
is so similar to this run, where you're like,
maybe it just is destined.
Yeah.
Maybe this is just what's going to happen, and they're going to shock the world,
and this is going to be the craziest three-week, four-week run in history.
That's what I said before the Duke game.
I was like, are you a little worried if NC State wins at their destiny?
No, UConn would smash them.
But.
Smash them.
They can beat Purdue.
I am a little worried about Alabama, though,
because Alabama could just go nuclear from three.
You want to know what I'm betting that game?
What? Alabama. Spam a money line. Oh nuclear from three. You wanna know what I'm betting that game? What?
Alabama.
Batman Moneyline.
Oh, of course he is.
No I'm not.
Uh, Yukon to win by one to two.
Oh!
Oh, exactly.
Just for chaos.
That would...
We're going, we're gonna be with Dave and Big Cat who have huge, huge futures bets on Yukon.
Rico, Die Hard Alabama fan.
That would be the best content if it ended up with that
Scenario yeah, cuz if it's a blowout it would it would lose its luster, but if it's close to the end
Be it be quite a quite a scene
I am enjoying watching the Alabama fans like game plan for this game, and I saw one guy was like
They're like we got to just force the ball to cling in and caravan and let caravan shoot threes caravan shooting 40% from three
Yeah, force the ball to 40% to two great players. Yeah, like they have just great players everywhere and I don't really know
What the answer is to you con other than the stress sleeping schedule is fucked up the strategy in this game for Alabama is just
Be Alabama and then hope you have the best Alabama night that you can
Because if they do play their best basketball, they definitely can win this shoot 60% from three
Yeah, like that's the thing is I'm not I don't give I'm not saying that Alabama has zero chance
They definitely have a chance because of the style they play if they hit all their threes
Anyone could lose to them on any night
But you can is just a kind of a there's levels and they're just at a different level
right now if they come out and play.
Like UConn would have to play, what, a C- game
to give Alabama a chance?
Like if I think about, if UConn plays a B game,
they beat everyone.
Yeah, I'm gonna take Connecticut minus 11 and a half,
and then I'm gonna take NC State Moneyline.
Ooh.
And we'll let the chips fall where they may.
I wanna just shout out the women's game too real quick.
I kind of like UConn on Sunday.
Okay.
I scouted that UConn USC game.
They had a very good plan for Juju Watkins.
I think they'll have a very good plan for Caitlin Clark.
Let everyone else beat them except Caitlin Clark.
So yeah, I think that's what my plan is for Sunday.
I think that the powers that be- Oh no, Friday. That's Friday. Sorry, that's Friday my plan is for Sunday. I think that the powers that be.
Oh no, Friday, that's Friday, sorry, that's Friday.
Sunday is the championship game.
I think the powers that be really want
Caitlin Clark, South Carolina Championship.
Yeah.
They really want that.
Star player against a perfect team.
Ratings, higher or lower?
Then what?
Then LSU, Iowa.
Lower. In that championship game? Yeah. You think so? Yeah. I? Than LSU Iowa. Lower.
In that championship game?
Yeah.
You think so?
I just think LSU Iowa is gonna always have
the highest ratings of the tournament
just because of last year.
It was the highest rated women's college basketball game
ever.
I think highest rated women's game ever.
Yeah.
Across the board.
Sunday is ABC.
Yeah, that's true.
I think it would be higher.
Sunday afternoon.
I think Clark against undefeated USC would be higher.
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, South Carolina, yeah.
And they got what, 12.4 million? 12.4 million?
Something like that, yeah.
And Rusilo only watched a half.
The funniest was, everybody was talking about the LSU-Iowa game and then Rosilla tweeted something out about like some NBA player
That's the bad rebounds. He gets people so angry. I like it because it breaks up the timeline
Yeah, and he gets he does that every now and then where there'll be like a big
football game and he'll just randomly tweet like
Yeah, Blue Jays like like Manoa shouldn't have left that one hanging
Nah, people should be able to tweet about what they want to tweet about
I was reading about the Phillies during that game and every single comment was like read the room. It's everyone's talking about Kyle
Agreed we're defending Roussel. He just makes everyone so mad. I know like he had he makes people so mad
It's like like what you like who cares?
But he only watched half. Yeah who scored 50 points in the NBA yesterday?
Was it Malachi?
Yeah.
Malachi Flynn?
Malachi Flynn scored 50.
That might be the moment where we all realize
like scoring is out of control in the NBA right now.
Scoring is pretty crazy.
It is.
Congrats, Hank, you were saying before
that there's a 0% chance you don't make it to the finals.
I don't know if I said 0% chance but it would be it would be heartbreaking if they
don't pick out put a future on the nuggets and I was like that's a little well no I was
different. Hold on. I put a future on Scottie Scheffler in the nuggets so it might not even
be a thing. Yeah it was I put a future on Brooks in the Celtics. That's just me. I also
put a future on Brooks but it was a Scottie Scheffler in nuggets. I put a future on Brooks in the Celtics. That's just me I also put a future on Brooks, but it was a Scottie Scheffler in nuggets
I put a future on that part out you left that part out
So he's not even gonna be rooting for the Nuggets unless Scottie wins, correct
But I don't want Scottie to win
I want someone else to win but I think Scottie's playing so well that he's gonna win but I don't want him to win
I'm only gonna make sense. Yeah, but you could have just done Scottie in the Celtics
Why I'm only gonna make sense. Yeah, but you could have just done Scotty in the Celtics Why
You've done he doesn't think the cells and everything you've done
No, I think they absolutely could win but you want you like everything you've done to me
Let's get a reason to root against the Celtics. Boom. Got it. Oh my god. I got Yukon
This is why nuggets why I should have seen one formatted MVP
So I fair warning Hank, but again, I am a longtime nuggets. Yes. Yes. That's fine
He's a nugs guy been through before I'll go through it again. What do you say Max? I'll be rooting against the Celtics
I won't feel bad about it and I want your pain like bad
Yeah, so I'm not pretending.
You're not fake.
You're not fake.
Yeah.
You're a real one.
I mean, this is this is setting up for Hank to defeat Max.
Wait, how am I fake for not betting on your team?
No, you just like to be like, oh, it's a coincidence I bet on the Nuggets.
No, I think they're going to win the.
Why would I bet on something I don't think is going to happen?
How do you solve the Jokic riddle?
Yeah, I think that's going to happen. So that's what I bet. That's fine. Let's so what you want me to do it
I'm looking forward to it. I
Don't know how that's that's what I think is gonna happen. You do that all the time
I also don't think you're looking forward to it. I think you're scared of the nuggets
No, I'm not gonna go the nuggets will be nuggets will be a worthy test if the Celtics can make it that far and the nuggets
Do as well, but I'm super excited. I think it's what is April 22nd playoff start can't wait. Yeah
Don't see both six or six years
No, we're so don't see don't see one the heat
Yeah, maybe not also be at the Sixers game next week. Oh, yeah, what are you doing? Yeah, we'll talk about that next week
Okay, I was thinking about setting it up as my firefest, but yeah next week
All right. Well, let's talk more NBA. We got Alex Crusoe on the show
In studio awesome interview. It's brought to you by our friends at Coors light. Oh, do you have the chill calendar?
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It is the man, the myth, the legend, Alex Caruso, Chicago Bull.
Should we do the hard part first?
Yeah, sure.
Okay, because I was going to say NBA champion, but we don't think that. Oh, you don't recognize it? Yeah, we don't recognize it. Okay because I was gonna say NBA champion but we don't think that
championship counts. Oh you don't recognize it? Yeah we don't recognize it. Let's just do the hard part first. Let's just get out of the way.
Mickey Mouse. Bubble championship didn't count. La Bubble. How do you do what do you say to that?
Um gotta still play the games. Gotta still show up and win the games so I mean. Uh-huh. There's
something to play for you know like the NCAA tournament. Yeah. I mean, uh-huh. There's something to play for you know, like the NCAA tournament. Yeah, I mean happened
I'll say this it did happen. So what's what's what's the argument for the the argument is that LeBron LeBron won a championship?
And so okay, so actually we're fine with letting you my championship
Yeah, I'm fine with that. Congratulations. Yes. He's got a couple that you know. Yeah. A real so the the fake one. Three. Also uh what are you the first Italian American all defensive player in
the NBA? Is that is that what we declared last year? I talked about this. Yeah. Yeah. I think
Danilo never got one. I don't think uh I don't think the other white guy that was a guard that
made all defense was Italian so I think that has to be. It has to be you. Yeah. So wait, so talking about the
bubble championship, because obviously we're joking, but not
really, because we don't really count it for LeBron. Um, do you
think back and you're like, man, I kind of wish that we had won
that in like regular setting because it feels felt a little
different.
I would say just for the just for like the like all the extra
stuff that comes with it. Right.
You know, like being able to celebrate with fans afterwards,
being able to have a parade,
having the energy of like the final second countdown,
you know, like it would have been different
having 16,000 people in the arena,
regardless of home or away,
just to have that kind of atmosphere.
I mean, it still is incredible that you guys did it because it was very hard circumstances.
So three, three and a half months, basically a summer, and then you come back and just
start playing again.
Yeah.
Were you ever at any point being like, I really just want to go home.
I'm sick of living in Disney World.
Yes, but no.
You know, like it was kinda like,
I've seen like multiple takes, right?
There's like both sides of the spectrum.
Some people were like, it's the hardest thing ever.
And then some people were just like, yeah,
like it was, you know, a hotel and we stayed there.
I don't have kids, you know, at the time,
I wasn't in a relationship.
So like, for me, it was like college again.
Like I was just like going to
practice, I would go play golf, I go back, get some food, play
Call of Duty, and then wake up and go play basketball the next
day. Like, for me, it was like, this is not not terrible. Good
life. Yeah, like, I think people would some people would, would
take playing Call of Duty golf, and then go into play and then
get playoffs. I think some people would like that. But
yeah, what was the vibe like in there?
Were you guys hanging out with other teams or did you guys mostly just keep to
yourself? No. Yeah. It was like, it was like clicks.
Like everybody was with their own team. Um,
some people like turn their meeting rooms into like players lounges,
like had ping pong tables and stuff. But for the most part,
we were a pretty close group all year. Like we, we hung out, you know,
one through 15 on the roster. So it was easy for us to hang out once we got there
Yeah, were you allowed to buy coffee from Jimmy Butler or was that just for his teammates? I don't know. That's a good question
I never tried I didn't
I'm a little bit of a coffee drinker now, but this is really come on in the last like year year good
Yeah, no, I'm always like it just take a shower and go yeah, and a guy but recently coffee
I don't know. I don't know
I don't think he would have sold it to us. He would have poisoned it probably yeah
He would have done something to it. He would have like put some eye drops the little yeah
Yeah, easier question. Do you think the Suns would let you hang out with them?
No, probably not still
wanted to hang out with the sons. I'm going to say no to that as well.
Smart answer.
Yeah, yeah.
So yeah, I'm pumped that you're here.
Like I said, it had been a long time coming.
Got a million questions.
But I was just going back through your career.
And it's incredible seeing that you, four years of college,
and then the G League, and then getting to a point
where you sign a huge deal, win a championship,
sign a huge deal, become like a very impactful part
of like an NBA roster.
Was there any part of like that journey
where you're like, fuck, I was pretty close
to like not making it to where I wanted to do?
Because not a lot of guys do that journey.
You know what I mean?
Not a lot of guys are on that same path.
Yeah, I don't know if there was any point in time
where I was like, oh man, like
this might be it. But at the same time, like that's kind of what kept me, you know, on
my Ps and Qs and like on like top of my game to like make sure that when I got the opportunity,
I took advantage of it because I was like, all right, if I don't play good, like I'm
done. Right. You know, if I don't play in the G league, I'm not going to be able to
get to an NBA team. If I don't play good in college, I'm not going to be able to go to the G League or professional.
So it was always kind of like I was almost like a race horse.
I had blinders on, but at the same time, I understood what the stakes were when I was
playing.
Yeah.
Is it like that still now where it's like you have in the back of your mind, if I don't
work hard enough, this all could be over. Yeah, I mean that's that's
That's probably the cool thing about is like at first it was like, alright
I got to work hard and I got to play my ass off so I can get into
The league or get into this spot to get into the league and then you know, like you said like now
I've kind of established myself and
it's to the point to where I'm a coveted asset
and it's now the point to where it's like,
alright, that's the standard I have for myself.
I can't drop below that and water down everything that I've worked for
or throw away the work that I've put in.
I just really enjoy being competitive with myself and that's kind
of like the best part about it. I'm just constantly chasing.
What was the moment where you're like, oh shit, I am a coveted aspect? Because it's
crazy that not only did you obviously sign a great contract, but when you left the Lakers,
I feel like Lakers fans were so upset that you were not on the team.
Yeah, they still are.
Yeah, they're like pissed. They're like, I was the guy. I tweeted the other day. I blew out a pair of shoes in a game against the Timberwolves a couple
days ago. Even even just not even that tweet, but like, I'll tweet something and at least two to
10 responses will always be like, come back to LA like can't wait to see you in a Lakers uniform
next year. Like they they're either just like drinking the Kool-Aid or they just really are trying to convince
me to come back.
Every time I post something, they respond.
That's got to feel good though to be loved.
Yeah, no, that's cool.
I mean, because like you said, there's a time where people didn't know who I was at all.
And then we're to the point now where he's talked about being an asset, probably just
over the last couple of years.
Once I signed the contract in Chicago,
that was kind of like, all right, cool,
this one team really believes in me.
And that was a big step for me just to be able to,
like you said, keep taking another step,
keep chasing something.
And then the last couple years,
every year at the trade deadline,
there's rumors of one to two to 10 teams that are
interested in me. So I know, some type of, yeah, and I know
there's some type of, like you said, want for me to, to be on
their team. And I think that, I mean, that's, that's the goal.
You know, that's that's leverage. That's power in the
league is, you know, being able to say that multiple teams want
you on their team.
Yeah, that's a double sided coin, because you, yeah, you're wanted, but then also every time
there's a trade deadline, you're like, am I going to have to move again?
Yeah. Well, knock on wood. I've never been involved in a trade, really been a part of one. We didn't
have one, I don't think in LA, maybe besides picking up some free agents and haven't had one
really in Chicago. So I don't know about the whole moving thing, but there is, this year we were at home, I
think last, or no, no, this year we were in Memphis.
I was on the road the last two trade deadlines and it's like I'm getting ready.
We have a game both days.
I'm getting ready to lay down for my nap at 1230 or one and it's like deadlines at three.
I'm just, all right, text my agent. I'm like, hey, I'm just going to to lay down for my nap at like 12 30 or 1 and it's like deadlines at 3 is I'm just alright text my agent. Hey, I'm just gonna leave my phone on loud like if you need me just call me
Yeah, but I'm gonna go take a nap like I gotta take a nap so I can get ready for the game tonight
But it is nice to be wanted. How does that work for most players when they get traded?
I know you haven't been traded but from what you know
Do you do you get a call from your agent first or do you get do you have woge notifications on?
I don't have notifications
But I do follow woge
Are you Shams or woge guy? I think I think I'm woge but like I I don't think I have a side
I think it's just that woge was the first one I knew about right so I think that's where the loyalty kind of lies
Yeah, but I mean, you know, it's a it's a time game like shams eventually. Yeah, just the years is gonna have to take over
Yeah, I just wonder if most players, just the years is gonna have to take over.
Yeah, I just wonder if most players find out the right way
or if they find out the wrong way.
Yeah, I don't think most do.
I would be willing to bet that most find out,
you know, through their agent or through,
you know, you've heard social media like nightmares
where like they see someone tweet
that they've gotten traded
or something crazy like that.
I don't think most of the time, yeah, I just, you don't hear about it. So maybe, maybe that's the
thing is like when it happens, right, people just don't talk about it. But like you always
hear about the ones where it's like the agent calls you like, Hey, they just traded you.
Or like dude finds out on Twitter or one of their family members texts them. And that's
probably not a good feeling. And I also, at least from my perspective, I always like, obviously being on an NBA team
is so different than everyone else's work like day to day where you can't just walk
up to AK and be like, hey, you thinking about trading me?
I would assume, right?
I don't think that dynamic guy is.
Yeah, right.
Like he's not someone you can just be like, hey, can I just get a few minutes with you?
Just wondering what your plan is. Hey, when you have a few
Put you on my calendar real quick. No, I don't think yeah, that's probably not the way
Least not that I've seen to go about it. Yeah, that's what I mean that comes with the territory
You know, we make a lot of money to play children's game, you know at the end of the day it is what it is
Yeah, do you remember the moment when you knew that
LeBron trusted you? Oh, good question. Thank you. Thank you.
Are you say thank you to me? I know I was repeating after you
because yeah, good question. It was great. I would say.
Honestly, it's probably earlier than, than maybe even he
realized or people realize it was when I was on two-way my last
year in LA his first year and they were it was before the year before the AD trade so like
I was playing with him and a couple of our two ways and guys you know middle into the bench
because I don't think we were making the playoffs and it was before playing and we're playing at
Toronto and I'm running a pick and roll with him on the side and they like, this was when I figured out that, oh, when I'm
playing with him, people are just going to pay attention to him and I can just go shoot layups.
Yeah. And I just go straight downhill and shoot the layup and one. Um, nice. And one. Yeah. And
one. And he comes over to me and he's like talking very intently and directly and it was the first time like within a game where I like
It was just like oh, we're on the same team playing basketball. It's not like oh, that's LeBron
I'm Alex and we're just happen to be here
It was like he's talking to me like teammate like hey, we got to figure this out to try and win this game, right?
Yeah, yeah, like peers. Yeah, that was that was probably the first time looking back on it where I was just like
Okay, like this guy's competitive. Like that's what I do. This is going to be,
this is going to be a good thing. That's got to be a good feeling. Did that, did that like
unlock something in you where you're like, oh shit, LeBron believes me. Maybe, maybe I believe me too.
Yeah. I think it freed me up just to know that like the stuff that I see on the court,
he's also seeing if obviously, then then another level to that but like
It it my instincts kicked in like I was able to just kind of play free and play off my instincts and then from there
Learn what to do what not to do, you know
What I can get away with how I can be useful when playing with him and from there
I just I'm a learner so like the more opportunity the more reps I get like I use that store it up here and then just take it to
The next game. Yeah, did has Austin Reeves ever hit you up being like, how do I get LeBron to like me?
No, no, he hasn't we do we talked once we need to try he wants to try and play golf and I'd love to play
Golf in my heart. He's pretty good. Yeah. No
He has not hit me up for LeBron relationship advice. Yeah, I mean it is it is crazy to
Think about that team too
I mean I would assume Anthony Davis is one of those guys who I feel like gets forgotten at times of like how dominant
He is when you would even practice with him. We like fuck. This is like this when he controls the defense
Yeah, I mean the year we won the championship. We literally just like
If he switched onto somebody, you
just face guarded your guy and get ready to box out.
Cause like we're not helping him.
Don't need to help him.
Like if you try to take it to the rim, he's going to block it.
Or he's, you're going to throw it so far up.
Like you know, you're going to clank it off, trying to, trying to get around them.
And then, I mean, he's six, 10, six, 11, seven something wingspan.
Like he's guarding guys with links, moving his feet on the perimeter.
Like literally when people switched onto him
late in the club, we were just, all right,
find your guy, like we're gonna get the ball back here.
Yeah.
And then for me, I was just pressure the hell out
of everybody, send him into the rim.
We got Dwight Javelle and then you got Anthony Davis.
Two of the three of them are always on the court together.
Yeah, just feed him that way. Pretty easy for me, it's like yeah, he was he was a monster
He should have won DP a while here. I think they gave it to Yanis
and he gave MVP to but like
Literally that was that was that was our defense. Yeah, we just be super aggressive and then when 80 got on somebody
It's like just let him guard him. Yeah when he when he's on It's just the whole the whole defense just looks like unstoppable. Yeah, I mean what that
Literally what I told you like when he's on you don't have to play defense anymore. Yeah, he's just gonna do it
Who have you pissed off the most by like being in their face defensively?
Because you are a bulldog. Yeah, no, I have to be. Yeah. I mean, you're
all up in everyone's face. I think that's the fun thing for me too is like people always
get pissed off and like they think that I'm fouling and like everyone, you know, everyone's
best two players in the league thinks that everyone fouls. Right. Yeah. That's just how
it goes. But it's just funny to me because I just have like no emotion attached to it
and they're just, you know, if they get mad, it's, it's almost amusing for me because I'm like, you know, contact sport. What do you want me to do?
Yeah, we're playing a sport. I'll let you score. Yeah. Um, I don't know if any one person
comes to mind. Is it like though, is it in the calendar year? Can you tell like, I've
always thought like, you know, February is that time when it kind of, you have a lull
and guys are maybe looking for the all star break. There'll be games in February where somebody will be like, dude, can you stop?
Can you stop doing this?
Not directly, dude.
I don't know.
I mean, I can tell though, you know, like when I'm picking them up and they don't usually
complain to me, they'll complain to the refs.
Yeah.
You know, like I'll be super physical getting over a screen and then like I'm just trying
super hard, like getting deflection and like obviously. And then I'm just trying super hard, getting deflection.
And obviously, yeah, I'm trying to be all defense again.
And I'm trying to make sure that I'm creating more value
for myself in the league.
I'm not going to just keep letting you score.
Right.
You do things.
And then they start, they get mad.
They get pissed off and start yelling at the ref.
That's when you know you got them.
That's got to feel like the best feeling.
Yeah, yeah, though.
That's the best.
Yeah. Then you can kind of like you can kind of troll them in the moment, too.
You know, like you do the indirect, like really aggressive clap or like,
you know, yell at the crowd, right with them next to you.
That's when you can kind of like get under their skin, hop the floor a little bit.
Yeah. Well, stop the floor.
No, yeah, you can't stop the floor without being like,
not without being a troll
Something I don't think in a game. I hate that. Yes
Yeah, the five in unison. Yeah, you can't do that. You can't do that speaking of college though
You had a great career at Texas A&M. You went to sweet 16 your senior year
Are you still like you still watch college ball like in our fan? I watch A&M. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, are you still like, do you still watch college ball? Like in our
fan? I watch A and M. Yeah. Yeah. No, I can't watch. I can't watch too much college basketball.
Why it's just, it's, it's slow. Yeah. You know, it's a little too methodical and it's just,
I mean, once you played like night in night out, I'm playing against the best players
in the world. Like the talent level there is just so different like the skill level in college
Varies, yeah
You know the good teams, you know have a couple players that are really elite that are gonna be pros
But even the same time it's it's hard to watch but yeah, I'm still I'm still you know, maroon kool-aid
Yeah, and I'm through and through there guys. Yeah, we love buzz buzzes buzzes a good guy
It's our guy
So are there times when you're watching a college game and you're just frustrated being like all these wide open shots are not going in
Because that is what you watch the shots
Yeah, you know like NBA guys like you'll miss some open shots every now and then like that's rarely
Yeah, I mean it is it is more rare, but it's it's more just like the basic understanding of basketball
Yeah, you know like understanding how to play
Being able to make certain passes that should just be like elementary that they like mess up
Missing layups and stuff like that's the stuff that like open layups like wide open ones. Yeah, that's the stuff where it's just like
How awesome was it though to play in the tournament get to the sweet 16 because I mean I love it sweet
Well, you remember you remember our game against Northern Iowa. Yeah back, right?
Yeah, I mean I get reminded of that by people just as much as you know
Win the championship in LA like random people stop me like oh, dude. I loved you
Don't know but like you had that game in college. We had the comeback and I'm like, yep
We did like it was you know crazy
And then we went to sweet 16 and got smacked by Oklahoma, but that comeback was awesome
Yeah, but it was also that was the buddy healed year, right? So that
Smacked so you yeah, not even more because Villanova beat Oklahoma by like a thousand
yeah, that was that was a weird year in college basketball too, because there was like
It was just so up and down like we got up to number five in the country at one point that year and then we lost like four in a
row yeah and it was we beat every big 12 team we played like four or five big 12 teams but
went like a couple games over 500 against everybody else and that might have been the
year before so you text A&M you're from right around there
Yeah, I grew up there so you've never had a chance to be outside the Colt
No, I mean, I've seen other stuff. Yeah, but like
Do you understand how weird it is? Yeah, no, I do I get it
I think I think once I left college station and I was like because obviously obviously I'm still like, that's the only team I really root for.
Like I have a professional sports team that I love outside of
Premier League Soccer.
Oh, team Manchester City.
Oh, your front runner. Front runner. Yeah.
Been front end fan for 12 years.
Oh, when they, you know, won 12 years ago and won again.
Your championship merchant. Yeah, that's fine.
We can go with that.
And once I left and went to LA, I was like, oh, okay,
I get it.
Like everyone is really aggressively pro A&M
or anti A&M.
Yeah.
All right, that's fine.
Like we can go with that.
Like I will admit to being able to recognize that.
It doesn't lower my level of fandom
and love for appreciation. But since you're from College Station, you never thought that it doesn't lower my level of fandom and love or appreciation
but since you're from college station you never thought that it was weird the whole
yell eater thing that was always normal to you yeah i don't i don't i still don't think
it's weird but oh midnight yell this is a cult the midnight yell is not weird what about
when they like grab each other by the by the cock and they like no it's not the cock It's the waist or the it's the shoulder. I went to the store and all that said no the I mean the the midnight
Yeltsin is just a pep rally. That's yeah, I guess in the same way that Jonestown was a pep rally
There's no drinks being
Yeah, it's strange are you are you allowed in college station? Yeah, okay?
There you go come on here. We go. I mean you are I really I okay so on the drive over here
I was thinking that somebody was gonna show up with the t-shirt of my picture on it
Yeah, I in the back of my I was like they won't do that like but no I did it was cool
It made you cool. It's literally like the best it was 90% positive. Yeah. Yeah, who's the best crime to get busted for?
You're the last person in America. I think to get arrested for PR. Yeah. Yeah, it was the best crime to get busted for you're the last person in America
I think to get arrested for weed. Yeah
At least in Texas. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It was just a grinder, right? I am a trendsetter, you know, I pioneer
Yeah, I'm saving so many 18 to 21
Yeah, two year olds from getting arrested. That's a fax was it was just a grinder, right? Yeah, that's crazy
Yeah, that's like cuz I remember when it happened
I was like wait what that's what it yeah, dude
It was happening too. I was just like more annoyed than anything cuz I'm like this is
Well one I had to make sure cuz it was right for us free agent
I was like, I hope this doesn't mess up, you know
Anything with me signing contract didn't know worse not nobody in the league cared right we know why yeah
Yeah, and then while I was happening it was just since since the airport is on Nobody in the league cared, which we know why.
And then while it was happening, it was just since the airport is on, technically it's
on Texas A&M campus, it was campus police that came out.
They didn't give you, did you drop the?
No, it was too young.
Do you know who I am?
It was too young up and comers.
They were trying to, yeah, dude.
Remember Northern Iowa?
Fresh stashes.
You know, there's one of those.
They just wanted their big boss. Remember Northern Iowa fresh stashes, you know, they there's one of those they just wanted their big
Yeah, 12 12 points in 44 seconds anything to you
It might have let you go yeah, it actually would have been like they were like we're football fans
The only time a Dito who I am would work
Like you think 44 seconds you think yeah
It was it was kind of funny because at the time mean big cats reaction was the same which was like why why are they?
Getting it. Yeah, we're free Alex Cruz, and then there was a it just always makes me think back to the Laramie Tunsel draft in the NFL
Oh, yeah, we're like four teams five teams passed on the go was the night of the draft night
It was like minutes before the draft
Yeah, and teams panicked and like this guy smokes weed. He can't play in the NFL. What year was that?
That was like 20, 2016. 16. Yeah. Yeah.
That might've been like the second month of part of my take. Yeah.
The gas mask. That was crazy. Um, so Alex, I actually,
I own a piece of Alex Caruso history. I'm not sure if you're familiar with this.
I don't know if I am. Um, he has the grinder. You remember?
I would buy the, the belt probably does. That would be, I am he has the grinder you remember
Probably does that would reveal probably bumping so yeah, I own I own an NBA top shot Oh, yeah, I remember that the only one that I bought was your chase down block against James Harden
Yes, there's quite a few of those aren't there. I don't know how many there are no they're very rare. Okay. Yeah. Yeah
No, yeah, super rare
You know be even rare if you were to autograph my NBA
top shot for me and then I could try to sell that.
Can you do that?
I'll print out like a still frame.
OK, have you signed it?
OK, yeah.
But do you remember that block?
I do.
I do.
I turned it over right before that.
Oh, so you were making up for your mistake.
Yeah, yeah.
Classic Alex Caruso move.
It was a great block.
No, it was.
It was.
It was.
Yeah, so I'm watching it right now and there's it's in the in the bubble and you can see the the videos of the fans in the stands behind you, okay?
How weird was that?
Yeah, that was it was it was weird until the game started once the game started. You didn't really notice it
It was almost just like you know how there's like the ribbon board and the NBA NBA arenas
Yeah, it's just kind of like there
but pregame and like warmups, you're like looking and
there's like people's faces and these fish bowls just like staring at you.
It wasn't normal.
It wasn't normal, but like once the game started, I think it was pretty normal.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Um, I also sure little Wayne was in one of them for somebody too.
Yeah.
I think I was in one for the heat.
I think I chugged a beer
Oh, it might have been in the Eastern Conference in my father. They're like don't let this guy back off
Don't don't let him in the zoom again. Caruso is being brought to you by our great friends over at Topgolf
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I was I was reading the other day that you're a big fan of
Sandstorm by Darude now, so I don't know why they picked that song because I am first of all great song
You know classic but that wasn't the song the DJ was playing and warm-ups
Before that game because that's the whole the whole tweet was before the Minnesota night. I had a really good shooting
I knew career high seven made threes and I was like in the interview afterwards with Casey Johnson one of our reporters
I was just like yeah, I was like vibes were great pregame
Like I was I just coming out I was bobbing my head like music was phenomenal
I was making everything at warm-ups. So I was like, all right, probably gonna be a good night
Sure enough and then the guy tweeted and was like make sure it's sandstorm. I was just like, okay
I gave all the credit to sandstorm. Yeah. Yeah, then sandstorm didn't didn't deserve it
But you know shout out to the OG
How many points you think you could score in a game because you did the seven threes. I don't know if you
saw January 22nd when
Embiid went for 70 and Cat had 53 I did I did note I was like Embiid just went
for 70 Cat has 53 and Caruso has 9 in the first quarter. I'm pretty sure I saw that.
It's like everyone's going off right now. It's one of those days. It could be one of those nights.
I think you're 40 and you? I think 40 is a number.
It would have to be like,
it would have to be the right circumstance.
Like I'm only getting that many attempts up
if there's like a couple people out
or it's like end of the year, some type of situation.
I think that's my career high and I was like 32
and it was when I was on Two Way
and it was like one of those things where it's like, all right, playing the game like for my career here and I was like 32 and it was when I was on two way and it was like one of those things where it's like all right playing the game like for my
for my career here right and I think I made five threes in that game and then
had a bunch of layups and but like it was me and a bunch of two-way guys and
then like KCP and Rondo so who else is gonna take the shots yeah no I can't
wait for the 40 Alex Russo 40 night I I'll make sure walking whenever I get the 40 ball
I'll give you the shutout for oh, yeah, I would rock just be like they shadow part of my take inspiration behind all of it
You can do it. Yeah, just have you ever gotten the green light for an entire game. I
Mean I kind of do but like I'm trying to win too. So like I don't need to be out there just jacking up
Oh, no, give give Caruso the green light. See, that's the thing.
I don't think I have a red light.
I don't have, when I'm open, I'm allowed to shoot.
I'm allowed to be aggressive.
It's not like I'm.
Give a yield sign.
Yeah.
Does Billy Dee ever say, I want you to shoot more?
It's like a lime green.
Yeah.
Does he ever say, hey, you're hot, shoot more?
No.
But usually when I'm hot, I'm going to shoot it anyway.
The other night, I made seven of eight.
So like any chance I got.
Yeah.
So I did, but like, you know, we got Kobe,
we got Damar, Vuch, like I'm not gonna just run
the offense through me if I'm going one.
Yeah.
What's Billy D like as a head coach?
Billy D's got, you know, y'all say y'all like Buzz.
He's got a little bit of Buzz charisma into him,
you know, with the leadership and like
Making sure that you know, the team's kind of focused on and big storyteller guy big big big metaphor analogy guy So that that's always fine. So come out left field with some of these things
But then it you know, somehow it always correlates back to basketball. I
Like playing for Billy. He's competitive
You know, he's got some of that You know, he played in Providence back in the day.
I don't know if they were Big East or what they were, but he's got some of that.
Yeah, I think he played for Patino, right?
He's one of Patino's favorite players. He's stonking.
That makes sense.
I think Patino said he was fat when he came into college, and then he played his way.
He became great at the end of it. I don't know.
The only picture I've seen, he looks pretty skinny.
Yeah. Yeah, so what's a good Billy Dee metaphor Billy Dee metaphor?
dude, he just he he'll come up with stories and like he knows at this point that like
You know whenever he tells a story we like you know, I roll but it's just like okay. Here we go another story
So like he'll start it off and be like Vuj. I know you love stories. Here's another story
Like go into it before and it'll just you know, whatever we need during the season whether it's like, you know refocus on you know
We talked about that that using the old pictures from high school
like yeah finding the love for the game and stop they get out of your own head and thinking about
Circumstances presently, you know when you had hair
Yeah being being being more involved in your love for the game rather than focusing yourself kind of thing
I have a hair question,
but I wanna go a question off of Billy Dee.
When you got to the Bulls, he obviously was hired as well.
Were there any stories about Jim Boylan
and what happened before you got there?
So I don't know him personally.
Yeah.
We'll just, you know, disclaimer.
Yeah.
Cause that's gotta be, I mean,
Billy Donovan's a very coach. that guy was a unique character. I heard I heard he was a I heard
He was a unique character. Yeah
He basically was like a pop Warner coach playing coaching NBA basketball. I love that. Yeah, but he's I mean
Credit to him. He keeps finding jobs. Yeah, I know he's a
Coach he coached USA basketball. basketball, FIFA World Cup qualifiers.
He was head coach there.
I think he's in Indiana right now with the Pacers.
So maybe he's just a wizard in these meetings
with the office guys, or he's got blackmail on everybody.
Yeah, I don't know.
It was a ride.
It was a ride when he was here in Chicago.
It was something special. He had some sound bites. I heard it was a ride when he was here in Chicago was something. Yeah, especially soundbites
I heard it was unique
But alright, so the hair question when did you know that you're going bald cuz I feel like you did a really good job
Like we never really got
Full bald like you you got yeah, which fast enough that no one really caught on. Well, it was uh
It was right after it was right after the championship.
It was right after we won the chip.
And then I did a deal with Manscape.
I signed like a 100K deal with them
to like promote their stuff.
And this was like when they were first coming on
and like I ended up shooting a commercial with them
and it was on TNT or something.
It was like this cheesy little like me flying through the air.
Kind of like their whole, you know,
their whole bunch is like kind of like goofy and sarcastic.
And they were like, yeah,
we'll give you a bunch of money and do this commercial
and like shave your head.
I was like, all right, sure.
He's like, I'm gonna have to do this anyway.
Like, yeah, I might as well, you know,
get some, get some fun money.
Actually you did, you did have some bad hair.
I was going to say, I remember there was a second one
that was dodgy.
Yeah, I was, I was gonna say, I remember there was a second where it was dodgy.
Yeah, I was so locked in on basketball
that I just didn't care.
I think it was bad.
I would see some of the photos after games
and I'd be like, ah.
Yeah, the headband was smart
because you also rock the headband that's like,
did he have a traumatic brain injury
or is he wearing a headband?
It was a thick, yeah.
It was a thick ass one.
Well dude, I have a small head in general. So like, like
hats, beanies, like, I can't wear, like flat bill hats, like
I'm a big snapback. Yeah, baseball cap. Like I have to
like find certain ones that I can fit. So like, the headbands
are
the crucial. Yeah, it was it was important. Would you would you
always like make sure to adjust it after play if you got hit like real quick, pull it down to the right spot. Yeah, it was important. Would you always make sure to adjust it after a play if you got hit?
Real quick, pull it down to the right spot?
Yeah, I could feel it, but even then sometimes I've seen highlights of me where it's kind
of zigzagged and sometimes I just lose control of it.
Yeah, it's smart by manscape though.
It was like if we're going to ask somebody to shave their head, let's ask somebody who's
probably going to shave their head soon.
Yeah, it was very responsible.
Yeah. Have you thought about going mustache only?
I do every now and then the summer like I did for 4th of July last year. Yes. I'm sure yeah
Yeah, I can show you yeah. Yeah. I want to see that also you would drop 40 with mustache easy. That's a 40 stash easy
Yeah, I think I think I think that's probably the I think that's probably the yeah to it
Maybe that's a signal for us is the night that you're going to go off.
Just roll out there with a mustache as a signal.
That's now you're trying to get me in the green light.
You're trying to get me in the jaunté border.
Massive. Oh, stay away from that.
Did you do you find and show you to remember the time you got drug tested
because you did a Photoshop picture with muscles? Yeah.
No, I didn't do a Photoshop
You just posted a Photoshop some but someone posted it to me
Yeah, I was just getting back into LA and we're and I was working out and this was like this was a
This might have been before
After my two-way you're going into the year that we won the chip the 2020 season 1920 season
I was just working out,
like let's see what the young guys do,
like you come back a couple weeks before in September
and start working out, get in front of everybody again,
and the PR people just taking pictures, coming back,
and this was like, still after the hype was still building,
and somebody just photo, excuse me,
they Photoshopped it, made me look like Miles Garrett.
And then all of a sudden, like within a week, I got a drug test. And I was like, well, welcome to the welcome to the big leagues.
Oh, that's so good.
Yeah, it's pretty good.
So we had this debate last week on the show.
We're talking about college versus the NBA.
The shot making at the NBA is so much better.
Players are so much better at that level.
How many players do you think right now could go from the NBA if you were to take one guy,
put them on the worst roster in college basketball that's in the tournament?
So like one of the 16 seeds. Yeah. How many, how many players are there in the NBA where they
could take that roster and then win a championship with it? When, when the tournament, when the
guys put them on a team, like put them on the one of the worst teams.
When when the tournament when the guys put on a team like put them on the one of the worst teams
Like I was saying that it would be more than we think yeah more than you think for sure yeah, like if you
What's the number y'all or y'all y'all said I said a few I said like 15. I thought about it I think my numbers probably around 10. Oh, I was gonna go I was gonna go like way more triple that maybe yeah
Yeah, cuz like anybody that's like
Dude I mean
Guys, if you're so good, man, yeah
Yeah, like you got to automatically think bigs have an advantage because it's college like the big is back, right?
Yeah, you know so like that brings in a whole nother
couple group of people I
know, so like that brings in a whole nother couple group of people. I think probably 30 to 40. I'd say 30 30 safe because
you never know the last 10 they might not. Yeah, yeah. I was
thinking like Dwayne Wade when he was on market. They were a
decent team, but then they also had Dwayne Wade, but they didn't
even win the championship. I'm comparing this right now to like
every every player that I'm putting on the worst team. I'm
making them play Yukon in my head right now
Yeah, yeah, and like Yanis playing on like a 16 seed. I
Think they would probably win. You wouldn't even have to dribble. He just he just goes he's so strong
Like right you would it doesn't matter. He would have a voice about the whole team. Yeah. Yeah, he's dunking on grown men
Yeah, it wouldn't be fair. Yeah. Yeah. He's dunking on grown men. Yeah. It wouldn't be fair. Yeah. Um,
the, the, the best way I think we'll go with this. Well, 27, 27. That's a good answer.
Make a whole list. It makes it sound like you really thought about it. I did. Yeah.
The best way to like describe the difference, I think when horse said it a few years ago
where he was like the worst shooter on the NBA team would be the best shooter on a college
team. Yeah. Like that's even including big men. Yeah, like they better than like the three-point sniper on a college. I mean, yeah
I mean that's
I've seen
Javon McGee and Dwight Howard go shot for shot from the three-point line at five spots. That's crazy
Like, you know, like first one to miss and they both make like four or five in a row
Yeah, and y'all would never trust them to shoot like outside in the
game. You'd be like, No, no, no, don't do that. Like, set the
screen roll. We'll throw you the lob. But I've seen Yeah, like
I've seen I've seen a number of big men that just they can shoot
and practice but
Yeah, they're not asked to do it in the game. It's just it's
different.
Yeah. How awesome of a teammate was Javeil?
Javeil is a great teammate, man. He's one of the guys I love
seeing now because he's just so he he's so, he's so chill.
Like it doesn't like make any sense that, you know,
when he first came in the league,
he was on Shack and a Fool every other week.
Yeah.
And now he's playing like 17 years in the NBA.
Yeah. I know.
Like that's one of the things.
Incredible career.
He should get a lot of respect and admiration for that.
Cause like he figured it out
Yeah, he figured it out how to be a pro fun fact. Javale was the one that convinced me to wear the headband
Oh, really? Yeah, so he was the
Doing the yeah
He's an inspiration. He was a nice friend
Was he would go out there he would he was a great player by the time he was done with his career.
But he would still have like once a week he'd have a throwback Javell moment where he'd
do something like put up a show.
Yeah, I think he was just testing it out, like see if he still got it.
He was like, see if I can still do this.
Speaking of the NBA to college, can you tell a story about how you ruined the basketball
hopes of a TikToker? Cause I read that story.
Oh, I saw that.
Yeah.
It was high school.
Yeah.
Um, we talked about this the other day in the locker room randomly.
Um, cause we were talking about like, you know, every now and then guys will like, no
matter who it is at any level, they'd be like, Oh yeah, I played against that guy in high
school or I played against that guy in college.
And like, we don't remember because we played against thousands of people.
Right.
Um, my, I had a couple of people send me that tick tock where this guy was like,
basically talking about like, yeah, I thought I was good.
Like I thought our team was good.
Coach comes in and he tells them like, Hey, there's one guy in the other team.
You gotta worry about like, make sure that we're locked in and focus on him.
And like, we had some decent athletes, you know, in Texas, five, a five a school.
So like big school 3000 students, couple football
players, like, you know, first off the bus kind of guys. And
then like I come in and the coach points at me is like,
that's the guy to worry about. And this is when we talked
about like, I had the floppy hair, like I had bangs. Yeah. And
he tells a story is like, yeah, I'm just like stealing the
ball dunking, like doing a windmill warm I was like yeah, that was me in high school
Like I was I was different in high school
I was dunking on people and basically just playing like, you know how college players do at the rec and yeah in the offseason
Yeah, I love it though. This kid this kid told the whole story
He's like, yeah, I thought I was nice and then yeah, I was crucial showed up and I was like, oh fuck
I stink there are levels to this thing.
Yeah, that was, I remember the tournament too.
I remember we played a, it was a pre-season tournament
down in Houston.
Our coach took us down there
because he used to coach down in Houston a little bit.
And we just went out there and we just destroyed people.
We were just, we were a good team though my senior year.
We lost like five or six games.
Does this still shock you every now and then?
It is.
We were talking about this.
I was talking about it with Titus.
For some reason the NBA is the one sport where casual fans are like, oh, I could take him.
Scalabrini used to do the Scal challenge where he would just invite anyone who wanted.
I've seen that video.
He'd take somebody to like 11 and he smoked them 11-0.
Yeah.
It's like you don't understand how good we are to be in the NBA.
Do you ever have like people who talk shit and you're like, you just don't have any idea.
Like how hard is...
Yeah, all the time.
Every day.
You should do a Caruso challenge.
Yeah, maybe it should.
We can host it here.
Maybe we should.
Just dominate people.
If I played you first to 500.
That's like people, that's like people like random, like, like average, you know,
your average Joe on Twitter and he's just like, whenever I'm like playing bad or
something, he's just like, this guy sucks.
And I'm like, I'm like, he's like, I was scoring him any day.
I'm like, dude, I was first team all defense.
I'm like, that is incredibly hard to do.
Like you understand the people that I have to guard every night and night.
And you think that you can just walk in here and do this?
Yeah.
I think we need to do a crucial challenge. yeah that would be that would be a good one half court me versus
you first to 500 would I score eventually yeah I think I would just
like once I get up to 500 I just catch my breath for five points and go score
the other hundred in a row and I would clip that video and that would be. Yeah, that would be the.
Put that online every day.
How often?
First to five, me five-oh.
How often do you get people being like,
damn, you're a lot taller than I thought?
Yeah, pretty often.
Cause that's, it's always so funny.
Cause like even Steph, like.
You know, he looks.
People are like, oh, he's so small.
It's like, he's six, three, six, four.
Like that's a big human being.
And that's what I try to explain to people.
It's like, you, you don't understand the monsters
that play in the NBA.
Like these dudes are genetic lottery winners
and also athletic and coordinated.
Like you can pick anybody in the world
that you find a couple guys that are 6'10",
can't chew gum and ride a bike at the same time.
Like these dudes in here, like they're monsters.
Like they fill up a room.
Yeah.
And they're smart too.
They're, they're, they're smart.
They are coordinated.
Every they're strong.
Like I'm a, I'm a big human being, average, like
human being just on that scale.
Once I get into the NBA, I'm a little guy.
Yeah.
Like I'm, I'm small.
Yeah.
But even a dude like James Harden, he is, he's so
smart when it comes to understanding the rules, how to use them to his advantage and take whatever the refs are going
to give him. Yeah, there's a bunch of people like that now. Yeah. So how do you adjust your
defense planning against guys like that? I mean, he first you got to learn what's a foul and what's
not a foul based on how the league is going to officiate it. Like that's the key. Cause like,
you can think you're playing really good defense, but like what they could do in the 90s
and the early 2000s,
you'd foul out in 10 minutes trying to do that nowadays.
So I mean, a lot of it's just figuring it out
and then, you know, just not getting upset
when the refs call something that you think is bullshit.
Yeah.
Like that's the biggest thing is like,
they're gonna call some bad fouls that,
it's a product, right?
We want to score points, we want want to entertain people so like the offense is
always gonna have the advantage yeah so at that point it's just like all right
don't don't get pissed when there's a bad one is it like night to night in
terms of how you adjust how you play defense depending on the refs or is it
month to month year to year because they do they do put points of emphasis on
things at different times yeah sometimes the points of emphasis lasts for a couple
weeks sometimes it lasts a whole year. That's neither here nor there. Yeah, you know, but no the
the way that the game is called usually
increases towards the end of the year, you know, like there's been there's been an uptick like statistically and like the amount of free throws shot
before all-star break and after all-star break. Well, I guess so down to like a regression
before All-Star break and after All-Star break, well I guess so down to like a regression.
Less fouls are being called,
it's starting to get a little more playoff-like.
Where like, you don't get the little bump,
head fake, throw it at the rim call anymore.
And that's always an interesting dynamic
to see how like the guys who do get those calls
during the year have to adjust.
And that's what we were talking about earlier
where like guys get pissed and they start yelling at the refs.
And it's like, no, I know that I can get away with this now
or vice versa.
My favorite is whenever Jokic tries to act
like he was gonna shoot a three from the opposing.
Oh, it's not bad.
He's gonna get it some time.
He should, they should go, he's in the act of shooting.
You know what's crazy about that is like,
practically thinking, right?
Why would that not be?
If he's legitimately shooting the ball?
Yeah, right from there like it's like though
It's like the it's like the people who talk about like if it's a foul in the first minute of the game
It should be a foul in the 47th minute. Yeah. Yeah kind of kind of true. Yeah
I don't like it swallow your whistle like if the dudes trying to shoot it
What like what at what distance does it become not an attempted shot yeah why can I not shoot it from here why why is that before
Steph if somebody was trying to pull up like five feet from half court they'd be
like no that's that wasn't gonna go yeah they'd be like no you weren't really
trying to shoot it like you don't you don't get to judge my intent like yeah
just take the facts what they are okay should probably make that I hope it
happens he could play off game like it like a con they won't they won't do it would be great so he sees it next year get
what get one yeah yeah that's what they should actually do is tell the refs okay
we got we have to give him one so he stops trying it yeah and give it to no
see the problem is you give one now they're gonna do it oh now everyone
they're gonna drop plays first time that happens it'll happen three or four times
the next night and then yeah yeah somebody will try it well I don't want to I think you can guard anyone so I don't want to disrespect you and asking who's the hardest to guard
But thank you has the most
In their back who has the most moves where you're like damn like they just do everything
this year I
Mean it's the two guys that are guards that are in the MVP conversations, Luca and
Shay Gilder's Alexander. Yeah. There's, there's, his career's over. Cause that commercial,
we were commercial him and chat singing. Oh dude, that was so tough. I actually saw so
many times watching the games too. They literally like, they're a fun young team and those guys
are so good. And it's like, I don't like them. RIP their career. Sad to see for them. It was so promising. Yeah. So, so Luca, for example,
like I mean watching him play is crazy, but when you're, when you're playing against him,
I would assume it's more of like, we know he's going to score. We know he's going to get his
shots. Just trying to make him work as hard as possible for it. Yeah, no, that's I mean, that's you could you could use that line and sentence for 30
people in the NBA.
Really?
Yeah.
No, there's nothing you can't stop.
I've said this before.
It's like dudes, like the dudes in the league, like the ones, they're going to get their
averages.
Yeah.
Too many possessions.
The game's too open.
Like it's just there's 48 minutes.
They're going to play 40 of them
They're gonna get their numbers. You got to make sure the other guys don't get above their averages
You got to make sure this guy doesn't you know, he's averaging 29 30 31. You gotta make sure he doesn't give 40
Yeah, she doesn't get 50. Do you keep it in your head when someone scores on you? Like, alright, that was two
No, no, I don't. Okay. I got I'm
I got an amnesia when I play basketball. That's smart
You have to though. That's what we talked about these guys are
incredible athletes shot makers
Scores like they're gonna make shots like I could play the best defense in the world like good offense beats good defense any day
The week. Yeah, you're kitchen a one-foot
Timeline shot last year in the playoffs over AD. It's like like what do you like?
You couldn't have guarded any better dude threw in a prayer like
That's gonna happen. Like at that point. It's just like alright cool. Take it out. Let's go the other way
Yeah, how annoying was Pat Bevin practice?
Peva wasn't annoying in practice
He he tells us that he's annoying in practice. He ended Jeremy Lynn's career. It's hard work. Oh, I didn't know that
Well, no, he just said that when he was trying to get in the league
He was like I started guarding him the minute he got off the bus. Yeah. No, that's fair
I mean that but that's you got to do that same league. Yeah, it's you know, Pat recognized the opportunity
No, he just he just pisses people off because he's just so extra sometimes. Yeah, which I mean art
Yeah, how to do is you get to keep your job, bro?
Like you know, he was he was first team all defense for a handful of years
Yeah, and now he understands the game now
He knows how to think the game and that's just his stick now
That's his mantra you had to have been when he was on the Bulls last year and then now he's back off the Bulls
You're like fuck. I really liked when he was on my team and I didn't have to deal with him
Yeah, it was funny seeing it from like the first person view every night and seeing how he would like just fuck with people
Mm-hmm. He's the best. Yeah
Yeah, he's very good at getting inside your head and driving somebody off their game cuz now they're not thinking about the game
They think about Pat beth. Yeah, like he did that. He tried to do that to me a little bit
I can't remember what it was the game we played here. Yeah, late game. Yeah, and he he was messing with a couple of our guys and
he was like talking to our bench in front of our bench after like the thing with Bobby and Demar and so I was just
Like I was just like slowly escorting. I'm like, alright, come on
Come on, and he like slapped my hand down and like I knew he was just like, you know
He's doing what he does. And so I just don't even give him a reaction and he's like talking and he just passed me the butt panel
But alright, come on
Yeah, it's like I ignore it. Yeah, we both know that we don't want to waste energy doing this. Yeah, keep going
Yeah, who won the Bulls right now young guys cuz there are a lot of young guys is like you can see like they're gonna have a
long awesome career
Honestly, I think I mean, obviously the two are two guards
right now. I hope I don't Kobe. Yeah, just because they like you
can tell that they've they've as an NBA player, the thing I
respect the most about other NBA players is when you can tell
that they got better because they worked hard. Yeah, you know,
like, like, you can be good in the league,
but if like, if you leave one season,
like the end of the season, I come back next season
and my game is exactly the same
and I haven't changed anything,
I wouldn't respect that as much as like,
I saw Kobe last year and I saw him come back this year
and like, oh, I could tell he's worked all summer
and gotten better.
I have same thing.
I could tell all summer he worked,
got better. And then like through the year it shows like
those are the things that like, you can figure out who's going
to be in the league for a long time, based on who goes and
gets better each summer. Yeah, you know, because that's what
happens like every year. There's 60 new players picked in the
draft. Every year that 60 jobs that have to be replaced. And
then you got free agents, and you got people retiring.
The turnover is crazy in the NBA.
So if you're not getting better, and you're
staying in the same place, you walk in a dangerous line
of getting replaced.
Yeah, so what are you working on this off season?
I'm probably going to try and work on a little touch
shot mid-range instead of trying to get all the way to the rim,
just because over the last couple weeks I've been
dealing with like an ankle sprain and it's finally like feeling better but
like for those two weeks I didn't have like the explosion that I usually do and
I didn't have like the ability to like jump up like I'm missed a dunk one night
against somebody I barely made one last night like I'm starting to see the light
at the end of the tunnel it's like oh once I get old like I'm not gonna be able to
use my athleticism like I got to be able to get here and be crafty and use use
different shots so probably that probably playing off pivots in the lane
and then and then just working on little touch shots yeah how embarrassing is
that when you miss a dunk I've never missed one I've never missed it on Oh
for Oh yeah well you'd have to say that well I just want to make sure everyone
knows I know I said clearly I've never missed a dunk yeah you're right you're Oh for oh, yeah Well, you'd have to say that well, I just want to make sure everyone knows
No, I said clearly I've never missed a dunk. Yeah, you're right. You're right
Is that a hundred percent then or is that the zero percent?
It's a hundred percent because I've dunked on like the the couch ball. Yeah, I mean, okay
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you have you're right
Honestly not too much. Embarrassing isn't the word like, I'm more disappointed myself. Like I just wasted two points. Like I could have just laid it in and got my counts too. Yeah. Um, but not embarrassed.
Like I don't really hold fans opinions very high. That's smart. Or is that very, you know, like
not, not in a disrespectful way, but like a, you don't understand what's going on out here.
No, you can disrespect that. You can be like, yeah, you don't get it. Yeah. Yeah. No. It's like
we talked about earlier, like the people who think they can just like, you know, go score an NBA game.
I saw something, it was somebody on Tik Tok and it was like, it was like, you could give you $10
million right now or, or, or like, I could give you like $10 ten thousand dollars right now or you had to go get like five rebounds in NBA game for like yeah million dollars
And people are like I think I could do it
You couldn't bro
It's the Jay-z. I'm six five and someone athletic and like pretty heady like smart IQ like I can find the ball
I average like three and a half rebounds like four rebounds like you're not getting five
Yeah, good rule Thomas if somebody says you can either have
ten thousand dollars right now say yes yeah just say yes okay finish sentence
tunnel of chaos yeah we were talking about the in-season tournament a few
months ago and whether or not the players cared about it I think was smart
having you know the NBA give it setting aside okay here's cash here's money if
you end up winning but some teams obviously cared about it. Some teams did not care about it as much
Did you find yourself caring about the tournament? Yeah, I definitely cared about it. I
Don't think anybody didn't care
but I think some people had like a
For sure plan and guideline of what they wanted to do with the in-season tournament
And then some teams were list like kind of figuring out their team still, you know, it was so
early in the season that like a lot of people like if you look back at the games and look
to the box scores, like I'm sure probably half the teams in the league don't have two
or three of the players that played in those like started in those games for them playing
right now.
Like that's one thing is like it felt like it was a year ago.
Right. It was so long ago. So like maybe they maybe they change it and make make it
a little longer or push it a little a couple days back in the season. But no I definitely
cared is y'all y'all pro colored courts or I actually kind of liked the different like
I liked they're tough to look at but I did like that they tried to do something new.
I thought it was fun felt like it was different like I enjoyed like people said they hated looking at
You know, like I think I think Phoenix had a purple court. That was Charlotte was tough
What was Charlotte's was like teal? I know that that yeah
It's just anytime we're such creatures of habit and when we watch a game on TV if it's different we're like, yeah sucks bad
Yeah And when we watch a game on TV if it's different, we're like yeah sucks bad Yeah, exactly on bad bad fun if they if they reintroduce the first line or the first down line in football right now
People be like oh that sucks for a week. Yeah, they realize you can't live without it
But yeah anything news I thought I thought it was I thought it was good like the intensity around the games was real
like I don't know if y'all could feel it through the TV watching or not, but like
It felt you know people to call it like playoff, like we're treating like playoff game kind of thing. It felt like that
for, you know, majority of the games. Yeah. What's, uh, what's the best Jersey the Bulls
have right now that make you feel like you're going to play the best? Cause it is the black
with the little pinstripe. That's okay. Yeah. The classic ones are great. Sick. I love,
I think black, I think black uniforms are the best. Really? Yeah. The, uh, I, I think black I think black uniforms are the best really yeah the I do think the NBA has gone too uniform crazy
Like there's there's times they've they've caught it was it was a couple years ago a couple years ago
The city editions first came out it was rough
It was a couple bad ones there was a game where I think the Pacers might have been playing the heat and it was like
The the heat was like color. Oh, yeah, throw up
Yeah, they felt wearing like yellow and the Pacers were wearing like what the heat should be wearing
I was like what is going on or so yeah, I'm like the nuggets
It was the nuggets playing the Blazers and the nuggets were wearing like a maroon and you're like what's going on here?
Oh, yeah, they did. Well, that's when they they like change their whole yeah logo and color scheme. Yeah, you know
I don't I don't like that what they man
What they need to do is bring back the old the old jerseys. Yeah, the nuggets with the stripes
Yeah, the stripes the Raptors the purple Raptors uniform
Grizzlies ones, you know, the balls are the only team in the NBA history never changed their logo
Yeah, it's the robot doing the DJ. That's why the black ones didn't tell you
Yeah, those are the night. Those are those are awesome ones. Yeah, when you first put on the DJ. That's why the black ones do it, I'm telling you. Yeah, those are awesome ones.
When you first put on the Bulls jersey,
were you like, I'm Michael Jordan.
Close, but no.
I was more like, John Paxson.
Shout out to my guy Pax.
But it's cool to be like, I'm wearing the same jersey
that the greatest player of all time wore.
Yeah, I think, well.
Oh, I almost got you. You almost sucked that in. You almost sucked that in. You almost sucked that in. You went by it. player of all time or yeah I think I think well I think we'll come back to
this the Jersey part is like the cool part is like y'all I don't think you'll
see the details but any team that's won a championship they have a crest yeah
like a I don't even know what it looks like, but it's like a shield with the number of
championships you won.
And so like every time you put on your jersey, right,
you put it on, you know, your back, Caruso six,
and then it has the thing on it.
So like when I was in LA, it said, you know, 16
or however many it was, and then the next year we won it,
17, so like that part is, when I put that on for the Bulls,
like that was cool.
And then like hearing like the,
the little theme song.
Alan Parsons project.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, that's.
It gets jacked up.
Yeah.
So yeah, what it is the, you know,
you look up and you're like,
man, I'm playing where the best player.
Bar none.
Not even close.
He's played there a couple of times.
So you're. LeBron? No, it was's played there a couple of times. So you're LeBron? No, I was
way more than a couple of times. Oh, oh wait. I don't know who we're talking about. We're
talking about the greatest player ever. Yeah. Who is that? Oh, you still got a year on your
contract with the Bulls. So yeah, yeah, no, I know. Probably. You're setting the stage.
It's one a one B. I don't know. You don't know which one
Yeah, I've got a really smart and I feel like I feel like somebody else asked me this
It is I wanted to say is you but I don't know if it was like the new hot dog is a sandwich
It's it's oh, it's not new. This has been going
I know but I'm saying like everyone asks this question that becomes like like first take when they just run out of stuff to talk
About yeah, well they yeah, that's another Everyone asks this question and it becomes like, like first take when they just run out of stuff to talk about.
Yeah, well they, yeah.
Who's to go?
That's a whole nother conversation, Sports Talk, TV.
Oh. What would you change?
Oh. What would I change?
Yeah. Just the whole thing.
What about us? Would you change us?
No, no, no, y'all are fine.
Y'all are like third party, kind of like omniscient,
you know, like over everything.
Yeah. I wouldn't,
I would have like specific sports stuff, like have to have former players
talk about stuff. I don't hate that because there are definitely.
I mean, we people that go through it. Yeah.
You're the ones speaking on it. Well, the problem is, I think
what we try to do is we try to admit that we are really stupid
before we say anything. Great disclaimer. Right.
A huge disclaimer that basically has liability.
Our entire career, except for MJ versus LeBron, we're very right about that.
Yeah, but everyone else.
Yeah, historians of the...
Yeah, people who don't admit that they're dumb before they say dumb stuff, I could see how you'd be like, you have no idea.
Or after, or at all, you know, in general.
There's nothing at stake if you're wrong.
Mad Dog said he was going to retire if the Diamondbacks made the World Series, right? yeah, yeah, yeah, and he's like come on. I was joking about that. Yeah, just kidding
I got three more years of my contract. Yeah, he would have high-stepped around the studio if he was right about it
Yeah, yeah, that's a fair point. I think having having somebody at least in the conversation that's gone through it would probably be a good addition overall
Yeah, are you a are you a Cowboys fan? No, I'm not. I got friends that are. We talked about this earlier. I don't have a favorite pro sports team.
I grew up in A&M, so like Maroon Kool-Aid from birth, and then I never caught on.
I would always watch the Texas teams though.
Growing up with basketball, I had like Prime Texas basketball, had T-Mac, YOW, I had Dirk.
Yeah. You know, the Hall Hall of Fame trio in San Antonio So like I was I was a fan of theirs, but like I didn't follow the teams
Did you just try to say some of my friends are Cowboys fans so you can relate to them?
You're you allowed to do that. No, no, no, I if they lose or win. I don't care. Okay. Yeah
No, it makes no difference to me. Hey, you cowboys fan. You don't care. You don't even take joy when they lose
That's the best part about not being in Cowboys. I take joy in my friends misery. Yeah, okay, it makes no difference to me. He's a Cowboys fan. You don't care? You don't even take joy when they lose?
That's the best part about not being a Cowboys fan.
I take joy in my friend's misery.
Yeah.
Okay, that's fair.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's fair.
But that's me being a good friend.
Yeah, right.
If I didn't do that, it would be rude.
Then you'd be a bad friend.
Yeah, if you're like, oh, I'm so sorry.
Yeah.
Yeah, that would be lame.
All right, well, I got one last question.
It's a Roeback question.
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We actually, once we get into playoff basketball, maybe when we have a question where we're
the dumb people talking about it, we might have to hit you up and be like, hey, can you
help us?
Phone a friend.
Yeah, phone a friend. My last question though is how many times do you think Lebron has read The Godfather? The book read The Godfather? Yeah, yeah a friend. My last question, though, is how many times do you think LeBron has read The Godfather?
The book read The Godfather?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
The book.
The one he had in the book.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, how many times do you think he's read it?
Twice.
Cover to cover?
Yeah.
Huh.
Have you seen him read it?
Cover to cover, you mean the front cover and the back cover?
Have you seen him reading it?
No, I haven't.
Do you remember when he was photographed walking into the locker room and every time his bookmark
was on the same thing? Was that was that in the bubble when he had the book? I don't know.
It was then someone asked him like who his favorite characters were and he he was like,
uh, the Italian guy. I don't know if it's the Italian guy. Let's see. LeBron asked what
his favorite scene from the Godfather is let's see what he says
I probably gonna play a stupid ad before this they're definitely gonna it's like the one where they kill everybody
Oh, how awesome is it to play with JR Smith?
The switch is the best he's I play a lot of golf with him really really good, right?
He's good when he's on he's he's really good. Yeah
Yeah, he was so chill. Do those that was something while we're filling this time our our team in the bubble had you know
Whenever you don't play in the games you do these things called stay ready runs
so like the guys that don't play will play pick up in the day stay in shape in case they got to go in and
play and so like
It would be you know, Quinn cook Jared Dudley
Taylor Horton Tucker, JR Smith, Deion Waiters,
JaVale and Dwight would get in there.
We had some elite, elite pickup runs in the bubble
when they weren't playing in between days.
So every now and then I'd go in and get my work in,
then I'd just sit there and watch them play.
It's the shot making ability for Deion and Swish.
Yeah, JR, when he would get hot get hot and just like everything would go. Yeah
I mean if you would have played I
Mean he did pretty well for himself. It's not like he had a bad career
Like he had a very good career, but like if you would have played in this era
It would have been yeah, it would have been talked about. Yeah, so here's what you got on the godfather
Let's see what he says
Not related to the game, but since it has been a lot of publicity
yesterday and today about Godfather Part 2.
Is that the Godfather talking to you?
What scene or the moment or the phrase or the quote
you like more from the movie?
Oh, from the Godfather.
There's too many different phrases and too many different lines in that movie to just
categorize one.
Fair answer.
But which is the one?
This guy double-jumped on it?
Yeah, he was fucking going at him.
I've never seen this.
Each movie is nine hours long.
I mean, what do you want me to do?
I mean, there's so many.
I don't know, I'll let you pick one and I'll roll with it.
It's a great trilogy. long. I mean, what you want me to do? So many. I don't know.
I'll let you pick one and I roll with it. It's a great trilogy.
That's that's actually the biggest proof information
overload that he didn't watch him was that he said it's a
great trilogy. Yeah, it's a great one and two. Yeah. The
third one stinks. I'm gonna be I was gonna be a hot. I've never
seen the Godfather or or the second one as an Italian. Yeah,
I know. What the fuck? I know the second one as an Italian. Yeah, I know what the fuck
I know it's it's I'll go home and watch it today. You're good fellas guy
Not really. I don't watch a lot of TV. No, I've never seen that. Oh my god
I don't watch a lot of TV like I watch sports. I watch YouTube Max. What are you? I mean Max this is
Italian discrimination by one of your own that's gonna be disappointed in me. No, it's alright. Hell. Yeah, man
Stick together Max doesn't mean that are you still trying to put in that Philly?
Now I have Godfather's like a thing that is on on in my house during Thanksgiving
But I don't know any I don't like know it like bar for bar like that
Like I like I don't like sit down and watch it all the time. It's just always kind of on
It's like that's like shooter. Yeah
It's on it's like no actually every Thanksgiving like in between football games. It's Godfather
It's like the radio in your house. Yeah, it's just background noise Godfather. Yeah, you leave your house
Like oh wait, you forgot to put off the Godfather
They used to run on AMC during every during every Thanksgiving
So it was an easy like flip back and forth like commercial go to the Godfather go back to the football game
Yeah, but then they stopped putting it on AMC
So we just we just run it like if there's if there's like a downtime in the football
I think where you're doing smart by the way, Alex
You're not you're definitely
not saying anything bad about LeBron today just in case. Not a great guy. Yeah just in case. Yeah.
Yeah. All right well this has been awesome man. Long overdue. One question y'all are y'all made
up after the James. Yes yeah it was I was a bitch. There's a lot of build up to that but then we
didn't get to see. Yeah well he was he was at he was at the game. Yeah. Yeah. So I was more mad.
You were yelling at that dude behind you.
That guy was a piece of shit.
But then we made friends.
You sounded like one.
We made friends there.
I was also.
Yeah, well, it's like, have you ever had...
Classic tough guy falling back scene.
Yeah.
He's like, did you sit down, then you...
I was...
He didn't think I was gonna stand up to him.
Yeah, he didn't.
And then when I did, he kind of respected it.
It's like, you know, sometimes you butt heads with somebody.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Then you become friends.
I also was never mad at PFT. I was only mad at Hank.
No, that's fair. Yeah.
I've never seen. Yeah.
And when his team's lose, he just doesn't talk. Well,
so that was the part I was required today. Yeah. Right. So actually that's,
that's a good question. If you,
how many players are there in the NBA that you could put on Wisconsin and win
the national championship? Cause they got beat by a 12 seed.
I will say, it might've been me.
Cause I didn't watch Wisconsin play all year
and apparently you had pretty good year.
Decent. Decent.
And then the only game I watched all year was.
The worst. Yeah.
It looks like they didn't know how to play basketball.
Yeah, it was not great.
No, it was not.
That was probably the game that you're like,
yeah, I can't watch college basketball.
It was, yeah. The first half was tough is tough I mean they didn't know how to play
basketball first half was tough it was so bad but yeah it was only Hank cuz he's
just like when his team's loose he like doesn't even watch yeah no I remember
seeing some of the some of the live stream stuff from the first weekend
there's a lot of animosity in the yeah it gets testing the worse the den the
better yeah yeah yeah I mean you probably also saw live streams this year in football season
You probably didn't see Hank. Yeah Patriots sucked. Mm-hmm. So you didn't watch
It's nice, you know a clip
I stumbled upon the other day was was Hank jumping into the pool and then running into the house. Yeah Cowboys fan
Yeah
Slamming into the wall. Yeah huge D. That's weird. He was a lot more lively when that team lost for him
It was fun. You know, I had to make lemons out of lemonade out of lemons
Yeah, Cowboys fans were doing that for a while. Yeah, that's true. All right. Well cruzo. Thank you so much, man
Awesome having you on we got to have you back on. Oh, yeah, especially because you live not too far from here
Yeah, Tim been long overdue. We also got a, I know we're doing our court,
we're doing a mini golf tournament next week,
so they're changing it,
but we have to have you come and-
Those are electric, by the way.
I've watched those on YouTube.
Yeah, we're gonna do one all live next week,
but we should have you come and have me-
Are you all doing it at the-
Here, they're building it here.
Oh, in here.
Yeah, if you wanna come do a practice round.
Yeah, you can.
If you're around, you can do a practice round.
What's your game like?
You get a putt-putt?
We'll do a pro hand. Yeah. I'm probably better at real golf than putt-putt, but like I compete, you know, yeah
Yeah, gauntlet he sees. Yeah
Was it 246 246? That's pretty good. Yeah, I'm good. He almost tripped over
Yeah with the roughing the passer from the bags board if you had gotten hurt that it would have gotten hurt, it would have been a tough sell.
I was just going to move back to New York.
Yeah.
All right.
Well, thanks so much, man.
Appreciate it.
Appreciate it, guys.
Thanks, man.
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Where to next.
Okay.
Let's wrap it up.
We got fire fest of the week, Hank.
Yeah.
My fire fest is, uh, tried to, you know, do something fun for the company.
Got a, got a mini golf tournament built summer saying it's only a day
I have that's fine
Nick
He wrote an intro for it. It's like mini golf the only idea Henry lockers ever had no
So I did the lawns of morning kind of hurts. Yeah, kind of true. It's kind of true
But now I'm just getting heat cuz there's a bunch of dick holes
It's kind of true. It's kind of true.
But now I'm just getting heat because there's a bunch of dick holes.
Yeah?
Dick, dick looks like a hole.
Yeah, I mean, it was very phallic.
I didn't design, I didn't do the individual holes and I probably, it's maybe a bit of
an oversight, but there are probably five or six solid...
Like the outline of the holes?
Dick holes.
Looks like dicks?
You should call that two-men corner if they're docking each other.
Yeah.
That's a good idea. Yeah, Hank also only good
He's come up to me probably
What are you gonna say I know what do you think I'm gonna say about practicing yeah, so Hank has come up through probably true
I want to play ten times in the last four days
Asking me the same question every single time and I give him the same
answer every time and then he comes back to me like two hours later he's like but
what like maybe what if I could what if we could practice more the issue is a
bunch of people are flying in for this they're flying in late Tuesday they only
have a chance to practice once Hank is like but can everyone else just practice
before that I'm like no if we're gonna do it
You know that people complain if everyone gets if people get to practice more than others
Well, Hank would never do that at a mini golf tournament
I get there early and he keeps coming up to me asking me if like there's any way that other people
Hank can practice more and I'm like we have to keep it consistent and he just thinks that like I'm gonna change my answer
Depending on the day Hank's definitely gonna practice late at night. He's gonna sneak back in to keep it consistent and he just thinks that like I'm gonna change my answer depending
on the day hangs definitely gonna practice late at night he's gonna sneak back in we
need a we need to check out the security I won't know I play by the rules this if you
really want to get a peek inside my mind it's I understand and I respect the decision and
I understand why it happened but my it's going up against it's going up against Dave Ryan Whitney Kirkman a and who are impossible to argue with my hope a little bit
Maybe was like maybe big cat will fight the fight for me and then I can kind of get in his ear like you know
Draymond green yeah, but that that but I've tested the waters and pick up many times
But many times you said what motivation do you think big cat would have to like go to he wants to practice I do I know and that's my I'm
saying like that oh you thought I did maybe that one no this is more than
enough honestly Hank the the correct thought about this tournament is I don't
care if I practice before right we're gonna go out there we're gonna watch I
don't want to practice to win I just want it's fun like we have a mini golf
course set up like I want to play you practice you want to practice win I don't care as much about winning as much as like like we have a mini golf course set up like I want to play you practice You want to practice win? I?
Don't care as much about winning as much as like when we have a mini golf course in the office like I am a child
I'm like I want to play up with yes mini golf course yeah, but it's fine
But it is that that might just be my fire first Hank just keeps asking the same question
I keep giving him the same answer, and then he comes back and he's like, but what about thankfully we're gone
I will say that to it We're gone this weekend. Otherwise
Intrusive thoughts made if you would have been here practice for sure
Hundred percent you'd be here, but I think I actually I think you've already practiced. I haven't secretly no I respect
I respect the rules. I've just been maybe lobbying
Swear to God you haven't practiced. Yeah, swear to God. I haven't taken this. I'm not going to I understand how much
People are gonna bitch about this so I have not. I've just
been trying to maybe change legislation in the court unsuccessfully. Unsuccessfully.
I still, I'm definitely getting asked that at least two more times. No, it's all, we're
not going to be back. By the time we're back it's practice round day. Yeah, but you're
going to be like, well I practiced once but can I practice again? No, no. It's over. We've
made it. Our flight's tonight. We're good. We're done practicing
Yeah, did Hank design this entire tournament just so that he could practice mini golf. Yes
No, it's just it was a good idea I had and
Mini golf you get some mini golf
Hank what ideas you got mini golf? It's gonna be more
Mega golf mega goo. I like mega which is just regular
golf oh no no it's got to be bigger than regular with bigger holes yeah longer longer holes
bigger holes yeah your clubs that would be fun yeah I would play mega golf for sure awesome
but yeah the so next week is gonna be great. We're Wednesday will be Wednesday morning will be around one when Wednesday afternoon
will be around two then a cut Wednesday night.
Prime time will be around three.
And then we're saving the final round for Thursday night after the Masters.
So people don't have to choose between us and the Masters.
I think we'd probably lose that fight.
Gifty.
Speaking of changing legislation, Hank, my fire fest of the week is that Billy football
is running for Congress.
So what started out as encouraging Billy to run for George Santos' seat, excuse me, run
against George Santos for Congress is turned into Billy seriously doing a campaign to get
elected to New York's third district to the point where today he was interviewed on Fox News.
I thought he did well on Fox News. Yeah. I thought he did a pretty good job. All things considered.
She the lady came after him right off the start. Yeah. Like you're not really running.
No I regret to inform you Billy football is 100 percent legitimately running for the seat.
legitimately running for the seat and my fire fest is that I feel like Oppenheimer that by putting this into motion I've affected the course of the
United States for the foreseeable future. Yeah it's scary. It's a scary thought. It
also it would be the perfect ending to like a part of my take documentary where
it shows like where are they now like at the end of Animal House. Yeah. Where it's
like oh big cat PFT hank are doing this Billy football went on to serve eight terms in Congress and is now running for vice
President. Yeah, like I could see that I could see that scenario panning out
He is taking it seriously
So if you want to read more about Billy running for Congress go to Bill Cotter for congress.com
I guess I could see Billy maybe the story ends like Billy gets elected to Congress and then creates
a law that bans podcasting and shut forever. Oh, yeah. Oh, podcast libraries. Yeah. So
he's like, you can only have your podcast live for 24 hours. So you're a podcaster.
You're a criminal. Yeah, I would actually take it one step further, Hank. I would say
that he could put us all in prison. Yeah'm really Billy's Billy's ultimate revenge is just throwing us
into a CIA black site I'm rooting for Billy to get to a point where he has to
debate and then I'm also rooting for Billy to win and then some big scandal
takes him down like I want him just live the George Santos story arc yeah
perfect except he's he's stealing frogs because it and then he would also just make us call him like congressman
Bill Cotter for the rest of his life. I yeah, that'd be funny
Yeah, I also hope that this ends it'd be awesome if like he lost
But then he did like election fraud and like campaign for like four years to try to get the results overturned
Yeah, because somebody screwed him over of his votes. It's gonna it's gonna be same. We also found out his middle name is Biddle. Yeah, that was a shocker
I still can't I can't believe bad job on our part not uncovering that years ago, Biddle
And you know the Billy's gonna be like don't make fun of it
It's my mom's like, you know name from some English old person like but it's still Biddle. Yeah, that's it's not like that's a weird name
It's the fact that it's Billy Biddle. Yeah, that's the weird part. Yeah. It's not a normal name.
No, it's not. No, but you know, you know, his answer would be that like English something
or other. Yeah, I want him to win. Listen, he's running on common sense. Dudes can't
buy houses anymore. Let's fix that. Uh, I think the article that was written about him, he's like, everyone can see there's problems and I see these problems and face value.
His that was it. That was it. But he sees the problems.
So his website, which is this is bill cotter for Congress 1.0 2.0 will be coming
out later where it kind of expands on his, his basic talking points for his campaign.
But his campaign is, uh, I like the good things. Yeah.
So if you like good stuff, then I'm a good guy to vote into office.
Remember when life rocked? Yeah. So, I mean, I, I'm proud of Billy for
taking it seriously, but at the same time, I'm like, dear God.
No, I mean, the craziest part about all of this-
He's worked more in three weeks on this campaign than he did his entire career.
Correct. He literally said that.
Yeah. He said, I've never worked harder than I have over the past week
It also is it's a state. It's a sad state of like
American politics that like I saw bit
I've read everything Billy's written and I've saw I saw him on on TV and I was like he's actually not a bad option
He isn't I honestly don't think he's that bad of an option. He would not be the most incompetent con right exactly that's that so I'm without a doubt I'm getting I mentioned closer and closer
to a full endorsement I haven't gotten there yet because he's running up against a guy named Jim
Toes so I want to see what Jim Toes has to say but we're getting closer to a full billy endorsement
for me yep yeah it's uh it's something it's something to take in I hope I hope we also get to a point where it's like
That we have to like he gets the delegation of the riders and Jerry's army and the minifans like he's got a he's got
To actually like pander for the endorsement
The best part of the interview was today when they asked him if he would if he is supporting Donald Trump for president
Yeah, and he goes yes, I would accept Donald support Donald Trump support if he gave it to me. He flipped it on him.
Yeah.
Like Billy, you can't teach that.
No, you can't.
But yeah, like, you know when it used to be that like, ooh, the Washington Post has decided
who they're backing?
Yeah.
I need that for like Jerry's army has come to their decision.
Yep.
The Minifans are ready to say who they are backing.
So this concerns me a little bit.
Max just brought up Jim Toe's website.
Yeah. So Billy's running on the common sense platform. Jim toes platform is
Oh no, it is hardcore common sense. That's way more common sense. Billy, how can you
get more hardcore than hardcore? You can't hardcore common sense about fact that he spells
his name like actual toes. Yeah, I was just assuming it was like Jonathan Taves.
No his name literally means athlete's foot.
So Billy's got to go mega hardcore common sense.
Yeah hardcore common sense beats common sense every day.
Foot fetish.
What about hardcore common sense?
What about NSFW common sense?
Yeah. Yeah. It's so common sense you won't NSFW common sense? Yeah.
Yeah.
It's so common sense you won't even be able to show your colleagues.
Yeah.
His name translates to foot sex.
This guy also, does he live in the-
What part of gym is that?
Does he live in the district?
Your dick.
He lives in the district.
That's a problem.
Oh, Jimmy Toes.
Yeah.
That or athlete's foot.
If it's GYM.
True. Yeah. Yeah
Okay, my fire fest have you contributed to billy football for Congress? I haven't decided I haven't I haven't yet
Yeah, I also think that he probably doesn't have his like financial setup that I would assume that I would just get robbed
Yeah, I think he probably would just get recurring payments from me. Yeah, this is it is very similar to the plotline of Jonah and Veep
Yeah, yeah, I also I have to watch my finance because I don't know if you know
It's hogs for the cause season. So I got hit up pretty hard. I did know that yeah
I got hit pretty hard who hits you up this year, uh, Ben Mets. Okay. Yeah, so it's caught. It's costly being his friend
very costly
my fire fest, oh actually, I've had a pretty good week,
but we have our wings date with Stanford Steve.
We don't have a wings place.
So anyone who's in Arizona, tell me the best wings place.
Oh, I got one.
Oh, okay, so the night on the fire fest.
I got a really good one, yep.
I don't say it.
Okay.
Also, I got an email from my daughter's school
that said that there was a bout of diarrhea going around and if you have three
Diarrhea as you're out for the day and I was like that would suck if we had that here. That's a lot of diarrhea
I'd be out. Yeah, we'd all be out. I saw that email. It's like wait. They have a three strike diarrhea
Policy, that's wild crazy
Wasn't my daughter so but still like just the idea of being anywhere where three diarrhea's would get me kicked out
I I would be scared to go anywhere swimming pool swimming pool is like if you hot tubs
Yeah, if you had diarrhea within the last year, you know, oh, yeah hot tubs. I don't listen
That's not hot tub is pretty much a bath
Yeah, and that it does say don't if you come in here don't have diarrhea. It's like bro. I always have diarrhea
So that's not we're not doing that all right Jake finish soft
Yeah on a similar note the other day. I was in the bathroom and
The lights just went off yeah, like they do that when there's not enough movement
So I was sitting too long. It just got pitch black and I didn't throw my flashlight. Oh, no. Yeah, that's rough
That's rough. It's happened to me a couple times. Yeah, me too. Yeah, we need to change those timers. It's very quick
Yeah, it's just hanging out. You're hanging out too long
Yeah, pooping in here, but it's nice when somebody walks in and you're just like, thank you. Yeah, I kind of like pooping in the dark
Yeah, you got to clean up you want to unpack that real quick
There's something about just like you just don't want to see yourself. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah
Yes, then you can focus right like I've done in my my like
Apartment before just like it's dark. I'll just I am pooh
If you wake up in the middle of night you have to shit. I never turn the yes exactly wake you up
Yes, seeing yourself does suck. I actually a real fire first. I have not
Gotten the toenail polish off my toes from Arch Madness a month ago and every morning
I wake up, and I'm like fuck and I'm just too lazy. I just don't
How much toenail polish is still on there all of it?
Are you serious? I?
That yeah, that's all I just assumed that it faded away ain't no you can use I
My wife gave me the toenail polish remover, and I started to do it
It took fucking forever, and I just gave up and I was like I'll just I
Don't know I guess next time I go to a pool. It's gonna be I guess we could yeah
I'd probably could this could be a problem this weekend. Yeah
Max well, maybe it's just kale Williams
Max you take your shirt off when you poop
Never never you seem like a guy who would know I I try to keep my shirt on as
All the time as often as possible. It's yeah, that's another thing sometimes
I'll shower in the dark because I you know I don't want to see myself. That's dangerous. That's
Not fully dark shower in the dark not fully. It's kind of relaxing actually well
It's like if it's daytime, and I don't have windows
But like I'll like open my door a little bit
and then the natural light will come through.
Yeah, like a tiny bit of light in the shower.
Yeah, like a tiny bit of light in the shower.
It's like a meditation.
It's like relaxing.
Yeah, that's true.
It's relaxing.
All right, good show boys.
Numbers?
Eight.
Three.
40.
18.
I rolled 77
99 put
Good luck to Pug and Seton Hall tonight trying to win the NIT 20, I almost never said it
That would have been brutal
56
56
That's the first one I won on
You didn't win
Look at us
There he is, at the old office I guess
Doesn't count. Love okay, love okay, love okay, love okay
Take on me, take me on
I'll be gone, but I don't want to
I don't need less to say
I'm odd to say this
But I'm here, still a little way
I'm barely learning but life is okay
Say after me
It's no better to be safe than sorry
To be safe than sorry
To be safe and sound
Take on me Take me on
I'll be gone
In a day or two
Take me on, I'll be gone in a day or two