Pardon My Take - NFL Week 5 Recap, Fastest 2 Minutes, Deion Sanders, And Lebron Blah Blah Blah

Episode Date: October 12, 2020

NFL Week 5 in the books. Fastest 2 minutes (2:26 - 8:07). The Seahawks played another insane game. Dan Quinn fired and Teddy keeps winning. The Raiders blueprint game. Eagles/Steelers for the Battle of Bwentzylvania. Alex Smith's return, the Dolphins are going to make the playoffs (we think). Dak's injury and the Browns are actually good. Deion Sanders joins for 10 minutes to talk about the biggest stories from Sunday. Football guy of the week (86:11 - 99:12). Who's back of the week. And Lebron blah blah blahYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. On today's pardon my take, week five of the NFL season, we recap a weird day. I don't even know if it was, there was some bad football, there was some good football. It was a weird day and it was finished off by, well, that's always weird. The Seahawks never play a normal game and that's what happened. We'll talk about that as well, that got hurt, that sucked.

So yeah, we have everything to recap. There was, oh no, there was baseball playoffs. Baseball playoffs, we'll talk about baseball playoffs, MLS, did I miss any sports? Oh, there's French Open. There's some figure skating qualifiers as well. There's French Open, the figure skating, we'll get it all. We'll hit every single sport you can imagine when we start before we do that. No officers and start in the NBA.

That's true. That's true. That's the real season for some of us. Pardon my take is brought to you by the Cash App. Not only is it the easiest place to send money to your friends, it's the safest. Go download the Cash App. Right now, use code BARSTEL, you get $10 for free, $10 to the ASPCA. Download that Cash App, it links directly to your bank account, it is super easy to

use. Cash App is also giving away money all the time on social, Twitter, Instagram, Twitch. You need a Cash Tag though, otherwise you cannot get free money from the Cash App. Well you can actually, I lied, because you can do it right now, if you put in the referral code BARSTEL, you get $10 for free, $10 for free, $10 to the ASPCA, code BARSTEL. Do it, do it, do it. Download the Cash App from the App Store, Google Play Store today and get involved with our friends from the Cash App.

Okay, let's go. Now in the street there is violence, and then a lot of stuff will have to be done, no place to hang out or wash in, and then again, leave all on the sun, oh no, we're gonna run down to electric high venue, and then we'll take it higher, oh we're gonna run down to electric high venue, it's part of my tag presented by Barstool Sports. Welcome to part of my tag presented by the Cash App, go download it right now, use code BARSTEL, you get $10 for free, $10 to the ASPCA, today is Monday, October 12th, week five.

Careful, don't lose your voice. We start in Pittsburgh, where the battle of Buen-Sylvania is renewed, and Ray Ray, you you get off of McLeod, help the Steelers rushing attack, Vinny Chase Claypool, and Eric Ibron-Tarage get internal from the spotlight as they help Pittsburgh to victory. Oh yeah, Travis Scott Fulgham, I think it's, oh yeah, Travis Scott Fulgham said, send me a cactus jack meal, I want barbecue sauce because we're not gonna catch up, and they did it, Steelers 38, Eagles 29, and Houston, where Romeo Cronelli said, below Brian's seat was hot in her, but who needs a COVID mask when you can put out Band-Aid on the season,

trained in too many cooks, kept going on, and on, and on, and on, it was pretty funny, then it got boring, but then it got funny again, Stephen A. Smith-Houshka has the Jaguars bottom-feeding in the AFC South, going over two from Field Goals, and Douglas Morone is trying to find a way to get his guys to stop playing like a clown posse before it's too late, Texan 30, the Jaguars 14, some spread, up to Kansas City, where Henry Lockwood Rugs came back from his latest two-week vacation, and is finally producing again for the Raiders. Josh Jacobs Sartorius instant jammed the ball down the Chief's throats as the Raiders climbed the Nelson agro-cragular, beating the Super Bowl champs, and getting all up into Andrew

Reed's guts, do, do, do, do, you have it, the Raiders 40, Chiefs 32, and the Meadowlands where Doundray 3000 Hopkins said, can you drink it, drink it, drink it, drink it, drink it like a Polaroid picture, but all the Instagram filters in the world can't make Laveon Bella Hadid look like he did five years ago. Joe Wacka Flacco Flame went hard into paint, hard into taint, because his defaults make him look like an asshole. We will respect him a loss, but it looks like Adam Sheptergase is deader than dead as the Jets fall to 0 and 5, the Cardinals 30, the New York football Jets 10.

In Atlanta where Fleetwood Matt Ryan said, now here you go Dan Quinn, you say you want your freedom, as the Falcons head coach's time in Atlanta is tick-tocking away. Mike Anthony Davis and the Los Angeles Lakers won their 17th title on Sunday night against an injury-depleted team in a fake AAU tournament, and that is your part of my take NBA title recap. Verbal meme for Arthur the Ardvark Plank as the Falcons fall 0 and 5, 23, 16, very topical teach. To Cleveland where the student became the teacher, as Kareem Pye Hutt finished after

pounding the inside all day, stealing one of Phillip River's signature moves. The Colts are feeling Iggy now, as the Cleveland coach said, I'm Stafansky, you already know as the Browns plant their flag as a contender in the AFC with a 4-in-1 start, 32, 23, out in San Fran where Les Miles Gaskin was eating up grass, and Preston Lacey Williams looked like he was being chased by Wee Man, the 49er Super Bowl hangover has reached, oh my god I'm never drinking again, territory. Xavian Dwight Howard got an interception in an NBA championship ring, and that was the part of my take NBA title recap.

Bobby John McCain brought his lunch palin and got another pick, forcing Kyle Shanahan to say I like my quarterbacks that don't get intercepted. The sole bright spot for the 49ers was rookie Kevin White's 20-yard kick return, I've got my eye on him as one of Schwab's pro bowlers, the Dolphins Trouch, San Fran, 43-17. Boom weren't you in that end zone back in the NFC championship game? With a young Tom Brady and Dwight Clark made the catch, but it was more about boom. You had a lot more here back then, boom. In the big day where the CBS truck said, I don't know how to duck, slow motion for me,

slow motion for me. We don't need to see that, boom. Even as a fan of Brown University football, I feel awful for Dak Prescott. Darius Rucker Slayton said, hold my hand to Daniel Jones as he let the quarterback to over half his passing yards on Sunday, and even our Dalton has been promoted to interim manager by President Mike McCarthy, who warned the crooked Joe Judge, don't drop the soap, don't drop the soap. As he scared Greg Zurline's last kick straight, Cowboy 37, Giants 34.

We finish in Seattle where Steely Dan Bailey and the Vikings said, are you feeling in the years? Cousins throwing picks at night in a touching tribute to my good friend, Eddie Van Helen. KJ right now said, I might as well jump. Slinging Kirk Cousins over his shoulder like he was a six-stringer. Grill Disley helped to let Russ Cook, as even after Kirk Cousins tried to aluminum foil the ending for the Seahawks, Seahawks 27, Vikings 26. All right, five, baby, we got Monday and Tuesday night football.

We got Monday, Tuesday night football. No Wednesday night football. Yes. Yes. It could happen. All right. Week five in the books. We're going to recap every game.

We've got Dion on for about 15 minutes. Well, they always give Roger Gidell a lot of credit saying, you know, Roger does the right thing and he will not put NFL football on Friday nights competing with the high schoolers. This year we might get Friday night football. Yeah, we might get Friday night football. I still don't. Before we get to Sunday football, I still don't understand.

And maybe this is, I don't know, you know what? This isn't even the hindsight is 20-20. I didn't. The NFL just schedule an extra week in the middle of the season to be like, OK, best case scenario, everyone just gets an extra by week or best case scenario. We skip this by week for the league wide and we go to the next week. Worst case scenario, like what's happening, every team that has missed a game can make it up in week 8.5.

Yeah. Week 8.5. The only problem with that is imagine going into that week. If there was no football on whatsoever, is that Apple picking weekend? Is that when you go out? Yes, I actually spend time with the family that actually is where we should like that's the future is that we need one week where we basically all freeze football for one weekend. Just do a bunch of family stuff, catch up on your sleep, do everything like that.

And then you come back and you're like, yes, this is awesome. Fans need a half time to there should be a second Pro Bowl for the first half Pro Bowl. Right. All right. Sunday night football, the Seahawks have never played a normal game in their life and it continued tonight. I guess we'll start with the end because everyone there's some people who disagree. We actually 100% agree together.

We watched the game and we said, Mike Zimmer, this is a good move. Yep. Essentially, we didn't even do it in a math way. We said, what do the Seahawks want the Vikings to do? They want to kick. They want the Vikings to kick a field goal because they haven't stopped shit all night. And then Mike Zimmer, of course, he goes for it, doesn't get it. Everyone says that's the dumbest thing ever.

You just gave Russell Wilson the ball back to win the game. He then wins the game because he's Russell Wilson. And we're left with the Vikings saying, how the hell did we lose that game? DK Metcalf won the game. Yes. First and foremost, DK Metcalf. We dropped it and then caught it. He dropped it because he didn't want to give the Vikings that much more time left to drive

back down the field. So excellent awareness by DK. He caught the ball in the end zone twice, didn't even get the ball on the one. He actually, he caught the ball on the zero yard line. So he's making progress. He dropped it on like the half inch line. Right. And he's good to being able to catch the ball before you crossed the line for DK.

But yeah, Mike Zimmer, he did make the right call because you do not want to give Russ Wilson the ball back. And yeah, like people were saying, well, you did give him the ball back. If you turned it over, I would rather be in that situation if I were the Vikings that you went for it. You could have ended the game right there. You would have a chance to end the game to absolutely close out. Russell Wilson never has the ball again.

You also, you also make them go 94 yards, which of course he went and did, but versus kicking the field goal, giving the ball to them, I don't know, they got to go 70 yards. And then everyone says, well, the worst that happens is you tie. If Russell Wilson is as good as we all think he is, and he is that good, he's probably better than what we think he is, a two point conversion should be pretty easy for him. Of course, people will play the results, not the process. They'll say, well, they didn't get the two point conversion at the end. That's stupid.

Their actual analytics, Saber, Metrix guys, also the play call, like Dalvin Cook gets that first down. He gets hurt. Madison doesn't bounce that outside. He's got no vision there, which he actually played a nice game, but I would do that exact same thing a hundred times out of a hundred times because you do not want to. You can win the game. The Raiders did it, which we'll get to the Raiders did it earlier where they said, we're

going to make sure that Patrick Holmes doesn't get the ball back, getting, making sure Russell doesn't doesn't get the ball back means you have to go for it on fourth down and the Seahawks defense stunk. They stunk all night. All night. They did not stop a nosebleed. I think that has a lot to do with the uniforms, the bright green uniforms. I said it the minute I saw.

If you look Mike Zimmer, he's got like a quarter of a good eye left, right? He's had what like 17s hit Mike Zimmer's eyes are the Alex Smith leg of the face and he's had so many surgeries. Even he can see the defense out there and he can tell where the guys are. He can make adjustments because they're the Kandy S uniforms. I think if you have like a ballhawking secondary, those bright green uniforms are sweet as hell. If you have a hard, if you want a hard hitting defense, no, those uniform, those uniforms look sweet.

No, if they're picking off passes, no, if they go, if they go full color rush highlighter, I'm down for it. Yes. The two tone is terrible. They went out. I said, fuck, I actually was pissed that I bet on the Seahawks when I saw those uniforms because they just looked ugly. They went half ass on the uniforms for sure.

Mike Zimmer is never going to trust a number as long as he lives. Somebody's going to come up to him and be like, well, Mike, the analytics say that you should go for it here on third and one and he'll be like, no, you know what? I'm going to punt. I remember what math did to me last time. Fool me once, shame on you. I don't even think he was doing math. Shame on numbers.

See, I don't think... Somebody went up to him and was like, Mike Zimmer, if you go for it here, your winning percentage is going to increase and he's like, no, not going to deal with math anymore. Math is for losers. I'd rather just go with my gut. I don't... Yeah, I don't think this was a math call. I think it was a, we're two for two on fourth down already.

We have 200 yards rushing. All we need is six inches. Kirk Cousins, I mean, maybe even fall forward. I like to call. I like to call. Of course, it didn't work out for the Vikings. And again, that's a game that they should win like a million times out of a millions because the way they dominated in the first half, they're only up 13-nothing.

You let those Seahawks come back. I... Listen, Russell Wilson is incredible. And maybe when Jamal Adams is out there, the Seahawks will look better. But from what I saw from the Seahawks and watching them, you know, I think we've watched every single one of their games, if that defense doesn't get fixed, they can't. They can't win a play. Like they can't go deep in the playoffs with that defense.

That was... There was... The Vikings had five drives where they had 10 plays plus. Yeah. It's brutal to watch. The entire first half, I think the first quarter, the Vikings had the ball for like 90 percent of the time. I'm not going to call them frauds because they have Russell Wilson.

I think Mike Zimmer actually did Kurt Cousins a huge favor tonight by getting all the conversation off of him. We're not talking about Kurt Cousins losing a primetime game anymore because he played... Overall, he played well. But add to the list of things that he can't do, primetime, bright lights, playoffs, and rain. Those are the four things that we know for a fact. The pick was bad.

He needs to wear gloves. I think he should rock two gloves. But I think he likes showing off that wedding ring, being like, yeah, I act like a virgin, but guess what? I've had sex, says it right here on my finger, in your face. But yeah, the Seattle Seahawks defense was... They looked like a bunch of mall security guards wearing those bright green, like the guys in the parking lot that say, actually, you know what, this spot's for expectant mothers

right now. Please move to the next spot. They didn't look like a professional defense. They missed Jadavion Clowney as well. Yeah, no, they had no past runs. They missed small Adams. Yeah. I mean, they were...

They missed the 12s. Everything was... Everything on their defense looked bad tonight. The 12s. I mean, Chris Collinsworth was actually right, I think, when he said Mike Zimmer probably would not go for it on the fourth down if the stadium was filled with people screaming, if like Michelle Tafoya was down on the sidelines, holding up like a picture of a jumbo jet being like it's louder than this.

I don't know. I think he's still co-forming. I think... That was a weird thing, though, to bring up being like the crowd, the lack of crowd. I think... No, I think he's right because... No, because he is... They would be so loud.

Because if you were listening earlier in the game, Chris Collinsworth said, I was talking to Pete Carroll and we're talking about the defense and how maybe the defense doesn't have an edge because they don't have that crowd. So he was trying to find a way to rework his research into the conversation. But, okay, at least from a fan's perspective, hearing the stadium that loud when Michelle Tafoya is screaming at you... Yeah, no, I get it. Like he's trying to talk to you when you're mowing the lawn.

I don't care. I still would have gone for it. I would have, too. I think he would have, too. I don't know. I like, actually, the Vikings, like, even in a loss, they look like they have fight, which is kind of all, especially after the start that they've had. Yeah.

And Dalvin Cook, if he's healthy and he can't stay healthy, they have the Falcons next week, so guess what? They're going to win next week. I think that the Vikings are fraudulently bad. I say something nice about the Vikings. They're not... They're the best, worst team in the league right now. They're the best, really stinking team.

I don't know about that. You still think the Falcons? No, no, no. Definitely not the Falcons. Falcons are terrible. The Falcons are a truly, truly terrible team. I'm going to look real quick. I'll give you...

I like the Chargers. Remember, I switched to... I'm down with Justin Herbert. I'm going to bet on him on Monday night, and I will get to the 49ers, but if they can figure out, like, a couple things, I don't know. Yeah, they're in there. It's like the 49ers, the Cardinals, the Vikings... But I'd say the 49ers and the Cardinals are...

But they're too... They're like... The Vikings look terrible today. They're good average teams. I think the Vikings are a good, bad team. Yeah, I'm looking... Yeah. It would not surprise me if the Vikings beat any team in the league.

I'll put it that way. I'm going to answer the Chargers, and also the Eagles, the Eagles, which we will also get to. The Eagles are going to win the NFC East. Absolutely. They're... They're going to win the NFC East. If the season ended today...

No. Yes. No. Or the Cowboys would be in first place. The Cowboys would. Yes, the Cowboys would. Panthers, Falcons, Dan Quinn has officially been fired. His last play call as a head coach for the Falcons was a field goal in a loss, which

is so, so fitting. And here's a little fun. We had the Browns always firing their coaches after the Steelers loss. This is now a trend for the Falcons. Arthur Blank has fired Jim Moore Jr., Mike Smith, Dan Quinn, which Mike Smith and Dan Quinn are kind of the same guy. In your head, they're kind of just blend together. One has hair and one doesn't.

Yeah. Mike Smith, he's got that silver fox look there. And they have the same blanks there. They've got the same pecs, same breasts. After all of them were fired after a loss to the Panthers. So that's Arthur Blank's little thing he does now. I knew it was over when Arthur Blank walked down onto the sideline in the fourth quarter and just kind of hovered behind him like the Grim Reaper's henchman, or the guy that

the Grim Reaper sends to your door to collect somebody, then bring him to the Grim Reaper. Yeah. Like he was just kind of hovering back there. I knew it was over when they ran Todd Gurley in the first drive of the game and Todd Gurley had 59 yards and they went right down the field and scored. And then he didn't touch the ball for the rest of the first half. Yeah. That's when I knew it was over.

When Mike's, Dan Quinn coached the Falcons the way we think about the Falcons. He's always thinking, well, we have all these wide receivers and number one picks. We have to throw the ball all the time. He's just forgetting the fact that Matt Ryan has quickly become like old, good, old quarterbacks that don't have the mobility. They reach a point where they just become the like tastiest treat for the defensive line to sack. Like Matt Ryan is just the easiest sacked quarterback ever.

But let's give credit to Teddy Bridgewater as well. Teddy Bridgewater. I have a whole Teddy Bridgewater thing. Teddy Bridgewater was great. One thing about the Falcons, I heard somebody say Bill O'Brien that's not happening. I might have said Bill O'Brien because he also fired their GM and their GM was, is pretty much Rasputin. Wait, Thomas Demitrov?

Demitrov got fired too. He's pretty much Rasputin. He can convince any owner in the league like, hey, I've got the pedigree. I was around. I smelled Ernie Adams Farts for a few years there. There was a period where I just kind of basked in his glory and now it's like, okay, I know what I'm doing. You have to trust me.

The franchise moving forward. But I don't know. I don't know who the Falcons get. I want them to get Mike Leach because he'd be perfect. Just like with that offense, it would be so much fun to watch the Falcons at least lose entertaining games. I mean, they scored two points on Saturday. That's true.

That's a good point. Six interceptions. 70 passes, two points. They should try to get. No hard that is to do. It's very hard. 70 passes, two points. The Falcons should try to get a first round pick as their head coach also.

That would be great. Byron Leftwich. Yeah. Was he forgotten the first round? Yeah. Byron. I'm pretty sure 90% of the left which was it was the first round. There we go.

That's the missing ingredient. Yeah. That's that's perfect and get Byron Leftwich and then it's just first rounders everywhere. I like that. That's a good idea. John Gruden. John Gruden got traded for a first rounder. So I think he's as close to that counts.

First round. Yes. Yes. Exactly. Yeah. Byron Leftwich, seventh pick in the draft. Not didn't pan out the way. Well, he was okay for a while.

Yeah. Right. So Ryan, after the game, he said the standard Atlanta Falcons boilerplate line. You have to say this after every loss. We're going to look ourselves in the mirror. You're going to take a long look in the mirror. We're going to just stare at ourselves. We're going to put mirrors.

We're going to replace every wall in the facility with mirrors. So we're just looking at ourselves all day and then that'll sort itself out. It's kinky as fuck. Just mirrors on the ceiling. Yeah. Mears on the walls. You can watch yourself. Fuck.

Matt Ryan just wants to make it a crunch fitness in there. Yeah. It's tough to see yourself in the mirror if you're a ghost like Arthur Blank. Maybe that's the problem. Just make the whole place bigger. Arthur Blank can't look at himself in the mirror. Yeah. So Teddy Bridgewater.

We got to respect Teddy Bridgewater. It's one of my goals. Teddy to gloves. The of I went and looked it up of the active quarterbacks. The NFL right now 40 minimum starts best winning percentage. Patrick Mahomes one Tom Brady to Russell Wilson three Ben Rotsberger for Aaron Rogers five Teddy Bridgewater six, six. He is 25.

I'm going to count it 25 and 14. He's 25 and 15 is a starter. One of them was week 17 for the Saints is the backup when they'd already sealed the number one seed 25 and 14 is a starter. All he does is win and all he does is a win as an underdog. He's 12 and 10 straight up as an underdog. That's pretty impressive. Teddy Bridgewater is under appreciated.

He's good. Teddy Bridgewater is just point blank a good quarterback in the NFL. Guys like him and guys want to play with him and Matt rule made funny you last week. I think you might be a good coach because you do not have a good roster and your best players out and you're still winning games. You're three, three, three wins in a row. It is crazy to think that Christian McCaffrey was what he's typically 60% of that offense are more sometimes and without him they're still winning divisional games.

Is it we should come up with like a there's got to be like a theory like when you lose your best player but you keep you start winning but you get better in spite of him right. Put that on a list. Jake will think of that some other day. The Christian doctrine, the Christian doctrine. I like that. Okay. We'll workshop it though.

It's basically when you have the best player on your team gets injured or traded and then your team gets better. Yeah. And maybe it's usually when that player went to like a really good academic school, right? Like we don't want to think about it and just throw it out there. All right. Yeah. So Falcons, Dan Quinn, who's the interim?

Do we know? I don't think we know yet. Let me let me see what the coaching staff will do the interim. Rich McKay. No, we'll be the interim GM Raheem Morris, Raheem Morris, Dirk Cutters also on the staff. Great football name. Dirk Cutter. Love that guy.

He sucks as a head coach though. He was terrible. Yeah. I don't know. I'm looking at that roster right now and I mean, Raheem Morris is the obvious guy. I think he's done it before. He's been interim. He's been a good coach.

Well, Dirk Cutter has been a head coach. Yeah. Yeah. Has he been an interim coach though? I don't know. But it is. It's always very dirt like this is the problem with having a former head coach. Wait, was Dirk Cutter a head coach?

Yeah, he was for the box, right? Am I making that up? It was during hard knocks. Yes, he was. He was so unmemorable. Yes. 2016-18. Dirk Cutter is the guy that you might recognize.

You're like, oh, is that one of the people from the nationwide commercials where they teach you how not to be a dad? Right. He's like the dad coach. Dirk Cutter, you don't want to have Dirk Cutter be your interim head coach and then the Falcons win enough games where you have to hire him. No. That's always a dangerous thing.

That guy's not a good head coach. Don't do that. Maybe do, maybe have your defensive coordinator coach, no head coach. Or you know what, there's got to be some guy, some football lifer, special teams coach, quality control, strength and conditioning, whatever it may be, who has zero aspirations of being a head coach. Make him the head coach knowing that no one's ever going to be like, hey, he should be the head coach next.

Or just Arthur Blank as the head coach. Yeah, that would work. That would be amazing. Have him play Madden. Bring Michael Vick to be the head coach. You knew that Arthur Blank was in a firing mood today when you saw his suit based on all the different accessories that he has on. Some people get dressed up to go to a job interview.

When you're an owner of a football team, you get dressed up when you know that it's firing day. So people should be wearing masks. You don't have to hear me say it. You probably follow John Rostine on Twitter. But there are certain people that wear their mask too well and you're like, that's a mask you want to wear to cut someone up and rich guy wearing a mask. It's too nice of a mask.

You feel a little too comfortable in it. I'd actually prefer you take off the mask, risk me getting the cocoa and we'll push aside you like kidnapping me and cutting me up in your basement. Not saying Arthur Blank would do that. No, he's got he can pay somebody to do that for him and he's got all the tools he owned Home Depot for like 40 years. He's got several circular saws that he can bring over. But when he had that mask on, I think he was putting the mask on not for public health

issues. But because he was just so happy that he was about to fire Dan Quinn, he was just standing behind him grinning on the sidelines or like licking his lips. Yep. Like now is the time I get to do this. And he didn't want America to know that he was taking such pleasure. Yes, I got the I got the head coach, Jeff Ulbrich. Jeff Ulbrich should be your new head coach.

He's assistant. He's a linebacker's coach, assistant linebacker's coach. That's who you should get. That's who you should you should promote because he's not ready to be a head coach. And that way you don't have to worry about him like winning some games, then being like, oh, shit, now we got to hire this guy. This guy definitely gives Jeff Ulbrich or Dave Brock, he gives a big, big Dan Campbell vibes, right?

Yeah. Or Bob Sutton, the defensive analyst who looks like he's 90 years old. There we go. You know what? Bob Sutton, I think, used to coach Mac. Yeah. Just have your strength and condition coach be the head coach because you've got all the talent, right?

You just need to work harder. Yep. Just have some like little fireplug of a dude on the sideline kicking everybody's ass when they screw up. Yeah. So all right. Good luck to the Falcons. Way to go.

You fired Dan Quinn. I'm going to miss you, Dan Quinn. You'll find out. So you'll find us. I mean, it's coaching is the one job they keep you from. Yeah. You're going to be defense coordinator. Pete Carroll will hire you back.

Yeah. And respect Teddy Bridgewater more. Okay. Next up, we have Raiders Chiefs, the real shocker of the day. The Chiefs. This is so PFT, I will talk about this with Dion, but the first thing that came to my mind when the Raiders beat the Chiefs, I said to myself blueprint game. So I went on Twitter and I was trying to find out, are people chatting about this being

a blueprint game? And I have something even more disgusting for you. People were chatting about it being a blueprint game, but not the Raiders giving a blueprint. Bill Belichick gave the blueprint last week. He just didn't have the horses to complete it. Yeah. The Raiders got the blueprint from the Patriots and then executed the blueprint. And now everyone else has the blueprint, which is essentially have the best offensive

line in the game, run the ball really well, make a few big plays with Henry Ruggs, who is electric. I can't keep track of the difference between Henry Ruggs, Jerry Judy, and C.D. Lamb. Mm hmm. And guess what? Jaylen Waddle, who's still at Alabama, might be the best of all. And Mechie.

Yeah. Mechie's good too. But that's the blueprint and also just have Patrick Mahomes have a slightly off day. Are you worried about the Chiefs? I'm not because Derek Carr, I think you're right, by the way, that they got the blueprint from the Patriots because John Gruden absolutely sat Derek Carr down like it was Clockwork Orange and just opened his eyes and made him watch that sack that Brian Hoyer took. It was like, if you do this, I will kill you.

Yes. I'm not going to leave you on the tarmac. Yes. I might like tie you down on the tarmac like an old time cartoon villain ties somebody to a railroad track and I'll instruct the plane to run you over on the tarmac. That's how. And we'll have Mark Davis try to save you, but he's so inept that he'll he'll die too. Yes.

I can't stress this enough. I will kill you if you do what Hoyer did. So I, yeah, I think that there's probably something to that. But Derek Carr. He's still really good. The blueprint is Derek Carr had his best game by far as a professional. Well, finally, it paid off seven years as a seven year bump for Derek Carr and more than that, it's like having rugs because Derek Carr, the big knock on Derek Carr outside

of his very tiny little hands, very, very small. He's like oily arms. Very, very small. The smallest hands is that he doesn't take risks. You know, he doesn't take the deep shot, but rugs changes that form and he was taking the deep shot and he was making the whole offense kind of work better when you can, when you can take the top off and that running game in the offensive line is legit. So yeah, blueprint game.

I think it is a blueprint game. I think so too. I'm going to withhold any judgment on the chief's offensive line because they played like shit today, but I'm not going to talk about Mitchell Schwartz until I see Jeff Schwartz comment on Twitter that it wasn't his fault. So I'm, this is me as a professional, respecting someone who's played the game. I want to tell me how his brother did. How Mahomes is drifting out of the pocket.

Yes, exactly. It's not the offensive line's fault. Exactly. He's not biased. Not because he's a former offensive lineman and his brothers on the team, he's just telling you Mahomes drifts. Which actually do agree. It does.

Yeah, he is right about that. I do want to say to John Gruden, you should not have accepted that penalty earlier in the game. Patrick Mahomes threw, I think the ball went about 75 yards in the air to Tyreek Hill who caught it. There was a hold. John Gruden, you love football. I love football.

By accepting that penalty, no, you just deprived future generations. John Gruden disagree. If he was in Gruden's quarterback camp, if he was watching that play, you would just be nutting. You know, see your Tantra. You're missing it. Pft. Full orgasm.

No, five hours. No, John Gruden accepted that penalty. Not because he accepted the penalty because he didn't want to give up a touchdown. He accepted that penalty because now that play becomes lore for real football guys who can say, you know, the best throw I've ever seen didn't even count. Yeah. And it's like a fable that you, you know, you whisper to people in 80 years, you're sitting at a crackling fire and you're like, I once saw a man throw it 70 yards and it

came back for a hold on Mitchell Swartz. I don't know if it was Mitchell Swartz. Every real fan has to have one of those plays that will never be featured on a highlight film. And it might be a play that gets taken back. In fact, I can tell you the best play of Jason Campbell's NFL career was against the Cowboys. He rolled out to his left, threw across his body at the goal and it was like seven yards out and it gave the, the R words at the time, a lead, like a four point lead with maybe

one minute left in the fourth course, something like that. And then there was a bullshit phantom hold on the right side of the line, but I still remember that play. Right. So this is why it makes me feel like I'm smart. Right. Yes. I stand corrected.

Yes. Thank you, John Gruden. Thank you to all community. We're the real, I'm going to remember that. You'll know Posers. That is Patrick Mahomes best throw by, he was getting hit way through Posers will tell you that Patrick Mahomes throw against the 49ers in the Super Bowl. No, best throw.

No, it was week five, 2020 on a play that didn't even count in one minute and 30 seconds into the game. Listen, my mom saw that throw in the Super Bowl. Okay. She could tell me that was a good throw. She could not watch this week five game in a lost Derek Carr. You probably want to hear the hits play where we've been watching this band for a long ass time.

I made one note about Derek Carr here. I think that he just looks better when he's playing outside. I think you know how you have inside cats, indoor cats and outdoor cats. Yeah. I think Derek Carr is an outdoor cat. Yeah. He looks way better when he's playing underneath the sun. Well, usually he does play outside.

He's now just recently started playing. Yeah. But I think he there's something about the natural sun. It's probably the mascara. It's like an oil. And the oil. Yeah. Um, I have.

So I threw this out there when we were watching the games. I have a take that I'm working on. I'm not ready yet. But essentially, if people want to help me with this, try to find some film. I think defenders are not hitting my homes as hard as they possibly can because no one wants to be the guy that hurts my homes. Hmm. Interesting.

It feels like when he starts running, there are times in a game where he'll scramble and he'll like, they'll almost all agree to give up the play at the same time. Like he'll kind of fall into a defender and be like, all right, the play is over. Like, we're good here. It's over. Right. There's certain quarterbacks that get teed off on where you can tell the defenders like to hit them.

I just smoke them in my homes is not that. I think everyone's like my homes is so liked, so loved, so exceptional that if you're the guy who fucks my homes up, people will blame you forever. Who do you think the quarterbacks are that get hit the hardest intentionally? I would say Eli Manning was Jay Cutler. Jay Cutler got one at him. He took a few shots. Yeah.

You know what we need to see just because you know that Fitzpatrick. It's going to run you over yourself. Yeah. You know, James, oh my God, they loved hitting James. Yes. Yes. We need like Brian Cushing to come out of retirement to settle this because he was the one that would just know.

Yeah. He wouldn't care. He'd go out. He'd hit. He'd hit mom's. So you want Brian to come back in and just head hunt. Yeah. Tell everybody I saw Patrick Holmes drinking a pumpkin spice latte.

Yeah. Like what the fuck? You fucking serious? Bro. Five hundred million dollars. Man is drinking fucking coffee. Bullshit. Starbucks.

Bullshit. All right. So the chief's got statement or blueprint game. I actually don't think that it's we can also say what we said to Dion as well that it's good they lost early. I'm going to say this. It was a wake up call. Yeah.

If you're a chief fan. They've been flirting with this. Yeah. They flirted with the Chargers. They flirted with the Patriots. Better. It happens week five than week 16. I'm.

They are not infallible. Maybe maybe it's just you could you could probably put it under the category of you're going to get the best shot because you shoot bull chance because what they did to the Ravens makes you think like OK they have that gear if they want to they just don't want to every week. Right. Then Travis Kelsey tweeted that he has to do better which thanks dude. Travis Kelsey didn't he have like a hundred some yards.

Sure. They're a pretty good game. He said that's on me to do better. Help me translate this. Sammy Watkins. I'm paraphrasing here. I don't know. But after the game he said everything happens for a reason.

I don't care what that reason is. I just want to learn from it and move on. So he's acknowledging that it happened for a reason but he's also saying like doesn't matter that it happened. He's like admitting that reasons do make things happen but he's also not letting those the reasons that things happen influence how he's going to deal with. But he wants to learn from it but he's once he gets I think it's I think what he's saying is it's like a reason once he squeezes everything out of the reason he'll throw it.

It's basically the reason is a grape and he's making it a raisin. The reason becomes a raisin and then he doesn't eat raisins. Okay. And the stuff that's inside the raisin before he squeezes out he's one and he's leaving that behind. I think that's how raisins get made right. I think you just leave him out in the sun for a while. So what happened like Derek Carr.

Yeah. Perfect. Boom. He's the reason. So there it is. The reason you lost. Mm hmm. All right.

Next up. Cardinals Jets. We don't talk a lot about this game. The Cardinals proved what they are which is not a bad team. Remember we said this on Friday. Cardinals are not frauds. Yeah. If the Cardinals don't win this game convincingly we officially are just like the Cardinals can't

be taken for real. I just the only thing I had was the Jets in the most jets like bad teams just find ways to have comical errors throughout a game and the Jets had it where they got they were like first in 10 on the 20. So they're in the red zone. They went for it on fourth and won didn't get it like three plays later they get a pick. So they're back in the red zone on the 10 and they settle for a field goal. So they won't run eight plays in the red zone and get three points and it's like oh that's

why the Jets are the Jets. They suck. If I were Sam Donald I would just I would milk this injury for a while. Yeah. I'd be like I got mono again. Right. Sorry I didn't learn my lesson. Mm-hmm.

Went out clubbing in Hoboken. Yeah. Made out with a couple of sixes. You know how it goes. Yeah. If I were Sam Donald there's no reason to come back right now. Absolutely like Joe Flacco Joe Flacco actually looked pretty good today. I'll give Joe Flacco credit.

Yeah. He looked better than Denver Joe Flacco he plays better at sea level. He's like whatever. Yeah. He's just. He's not good. Just for Joe to just hang around by the way he's another quarterback that defenses absolutely love to hit.

Yes. I think he's kind of big and a little bit soft. Yeah. And he wears those shoulder pads that have like the big boxy plate on his chest. And he and he's there are certain quarterbacks Joe Flacco Eli Manning Matt Ryan actually is one of them too where every now and then they'll try to run and they'll totally forget that they're the slowest people on earth. So they they try to get it going and then you'll see a linebacker like doing a light

jog running six times faster than them and just punish them. Yeah. Joe Flacco would also he used to run out of his knee brace sometimes like a horse scum just make that thing explode. Yeah. Trying to slide. But yeah. The Jets stink.

Adam Gase. I don't know. I think I think the worst punishment that the Jets could give Adam Gase is to make him continue continue to coach the Jets throughout the rest of the season. I've been saying it. I don't know why Adam Gase is even showing up. I mean show up but don't even do a game plan. Yeah.

It's so stupid. I mean just you can just recycle game plans at this point. Nobody's going to tell the difference. I I never said why an NFL coach like Adam Gase who has had two head coaching jobs. So you have to imagine what he's got at least like five six million dollars probably in the bank. Probably a little bit more maybe a little more depending on how he does his money whatever. If I were Adam Case I'd be like fuck this I'm out I'm going to go coach high school

football and have a nice life. Yeah. Like dominate high school football. I have a nice I think you're giving him a little bit too much credit. I didn't say I didn't say I didn't say I didn't say I didn't dominate high school football. You get worked in college. You get worked in D3. I'm saying high school football maybe maybe go out to like Montana and do where they don't

even have enough kids in the high school. Play seven on seven. Yeah. That and dominate that and just live your life. Keep him away from Arch Manning. Maybe that's his grand scheme is like I'm going to go down to New Orleans and ruin Arch Manning. Yeah.

I'm going to be the boss of Adam Gates. Like if I can if I can destroy this absolute stud this like you know this kid that everyone thinks is going to be the one one in three years time like then I will have accomplished my full form of Adam Gaesnes. He's bad. He is really bad. OK. Next game Eagles Steelers great game.

We got a Mike Tomlin quote alert. He said after the game the strength of the pack is the pack. We should actually get tattoos with that strength of the pack is the pack. It's like a fist. Yeah. If you're wondering where the strength comes from well dude it's the pack. So figure it out. But this game.

So we'll talk about the Eagles the Steelers first Chase Claypool was incredible and it just reminds you that Mike Tomlin and Kevin Colbert the GM they just find wide receivers no matter what. It makes you realize just how bad Lyma Swede must have been yes and how bad Martave is Bryant must have been. He had issues. He was good. Yeah he was really good issues.

But so I went and I looked through it. They have so they obviously have a few misses but they've never drafted a guy in the first round and almost every time they draft a guy he's like the sixth seventh or even later wide receiver off the board. So Chase Claypool this year Deontay Johnson who's pretty good who was good last year at like 60 catches and over 600 yards James Washington in the second round in 2018 Juju in the second round in 2017 Emmanuel Sanders in the third in 2010 Antonio Brown in 2010 the sixth round and Mike Wallace in the third round in 2009.

All they do is draft great receivers their average I combined them all their average are picking the 10th 10th receiver off the board and they find these guys. So think about it like every time they pick a receiver all these guys have gone off the board in front of them and they're like no we found the guy we want like Chase Claypool was the 11th receiver pick this year and he's awesome. It's still weird to me thinking of Pittsburgh as being a passing team. Right. I still think like they're just going to put your own baddest back there and grind out

like 3.3 yards per carry and beat you down with their defense. They've still got a really good defense but they secondary is not so great. Secondary is not not great right now but it's a pass rush is good. Yep. But Dupri is out there slinging Hondas TJ Watt yeah. So they also this is Big Ben coming off of not really a buy. This is actually Big Ben battling back from last week not getting to play football because another team had coronavirus.

Well let's wait you're putting it lightly is Big Ben's personal holocaust yeah not being able to play football and not being told that he's not going to be able to play football until the last second right because that was really like yeah you want to say like two hundred thousand plus Americans dead whatever Big Ben had a bi-week he didn't even know he was going to have a bi-week and that's a tragedy. This week Alex Smith got in meaning that Big Ben's comeback player of the year for which he made a documentary for your consideration consider Big Ben for this award. He got upstaged by Alex Smith so Ben was like if I'm not going to it looks like comeback

player of the year is off the table maybe maybe I'll just try to win the MVP again. And Dak where Big Ben was probably watching that game he's like Dak such a pussy like that's not even our injury he's like I've had that before yeah I talked to my doctor you said there were five other quarterbacks that have that same injury all right so the Eagles I actually this for Eagles fans you lose the Steelers but you have a win today like overall because the Giants are still very bad the Washington football team is very bad and then Dak Prescott goes down and guess what Carson Wentz looks like he's kind of figured it out like he's kind of fixed whatever was happening in the first few weeks where he

was god awful because he still got no one to throw to besides Travis Fogel who shout out him he's like a star now but when they get a few guys back I think the Eagles I think we're going to be talking about the Eagles in like five weeks and be like damn look at this team they look so much better there's also something about Wentz when he runs his body gets longer so like when he's diving forward he gets like extremely horizontal Kyle Murray's body gets wider yeah yeah you're right he does get a little bit thicker he does this he does this thing yeah he puts his arms out to the side he looks like one of those characters from Mario Brothers a little goombas right Carson Wentz he grows out so he turns into like the inflatable man guy

well he's always going forward and then he dives directly forward say what you want about Carson Wentz but he's I guess he's the exact right amount of dumb where he hasn't realized like oh this is how I always get injured so I'm going to keep doing this and it is what makes him good but yeah he's looking like he's like 80 percent of what Carson Wentz used to be but he but you if you're an Eagles fan you were freaking out in the first couple weeks like what the fuck is going on he had two picks today but I think one was a Hail Mary and one wasn't really his fault so he's I I really do think if you're an Eagles fan sitting here on Sunday night after week five you're you're winning this division the Hail Mary very confident saying Hail Mary was another one

of those plays the I feel smart play because I was like they should have batted that down yep because that's like a 60 yard swing right there it's fourth down stats he should not have intercepted he should have hit the ball into the ground but it's stats yeah but I felt smart when I was like he should not have picked that off so uh the Steelers big test next week against the Browns which will be fun but the overall like there was this was one of the best games we had today because there were some games that were really duds I mean the Cardinals Jets the Ravens game like there's this one was actually back and forth fun to watch and the Eagles they were dead in the third quarter and they came back and scored 15 points in a row and I think if you like

everything's kind of fucked up for the Eagles right now they have so many injuries they're the only team that has injuries they're the only team that forgot to turn injuries off before the season started so with everything that's happened to start the season I really do think you you're sitting there saying we're in a good spot yeah I have a suggested rule change that came out of this game so I think I think it was Carson Wentz that threw a pass the ball was like knocked to the ground it bounced twice and then got picked up by the Steelers defense and returned like it was an interception or a fumble if you do that to an opposing quarterback and the ball is very clearly an intercepted pass the other quarterback should be allowed to kick that guy in the nuts for running

down the field and making everybody think that it was an interception or a fumble or something like that when it very clearly was but I love those guys you get too excited I feel cheated it's their moment I feel cheated right and they look back and they're like why is no one chasing me like well because the whistle blew and the ball hit the ground five times you know what you can tell that's that's a holdover from a well coached team and training camp whether like anytime there's a ball you run to the end zone show judge run all the way through where else you're gonna be running yes yes you feel it it's Joe judge leaking through those are also the teams that have their entire kickoff team sprint through the end zone like five seconds after the ref calls for a touch they

swarm to the ball they do good coach team all right before we get to our next game quick word from our friends at butcher box when it comes to meat quality matters but there's more to it than texture and taste uh butcher box has the best meat out there it's got 100 grass fed finished beef free range organic chicken heritage bread pork or wild caught salmon at the grocery store let me tell you this it is about to be chili season so you better get your butcher box because I know they deliver some great beef every single month to my apartment and I make a huge batch of chili and it's delicious and it is football season it's chili season don't go to the grocery store don't be one of those idiots that has to go wait in line all the meat is delivered to your

door it's free of antibiotics added or added hormones each box has 9 to 11 pounds of meat enough for 24 individual meals packed fresh and shipped frozen and vacuum sealed so it stays that way you can customize your box go with one of theirs either way get exactly what you want butcher box is a no-brainer it's the best meat shipped right to your door which means one less trip to the grocers options like 100 grass fed and finished beef free range organic chicken heritage pork wild caught alaskan salmon and sugar nitrate free bacon do it right now with butcher box you get the highest quality meat around for just six dollars a meal right now butcher box is offering new members two lobster tails and two flamin yarns for free in their first

box that's two lobster tails two flamin yarns for free in your first box go to butcher box comm slash take that is butcher box comm slash take right now and check out how delicious butcher box is butcher box comm slash take it gets the big cat seal of approval we love butcher box you will not be disappointed butcher box comm slash take okay rams washington football team the big story of the day alex smith uh there was a lot of hand wringing people were very nervous for him i was happy for him because i there was a lot of people who were like projecting like alex smith you have so much money why are you doing this he clearly wants to he wanted to prove to himself he could get back it's a great story now i guess my only question upfd is like at what

point can we criticize his play not yet okay not yet perfect i wasn't going to i think he had 36 yards passing they were the 36 most glorious yards i wasn't gonna say that they ran 26 plays with them and they gained 25 yards no we're not we're the fact no completion was over six air yards i wasn't saying any of that the cat the most important side of the day yeah he's healthy heart the heart his heart was off the charts no it wasn't it's incredible he's back i'm very happy it is possible to feel good for alex smith while also feeling extremely uncomfortable watching him get back in for that first time like watching a russian bridge walking video right like you you watching you like damn those guys that is fucking incredible meanwhile your hands are sweating

no i like to hurt i like the russians that climb up to the top of the building that's what i'm saying those guys hang off yeah those guys yeah that's the video i'm talking like it felt like alex smith's first couple plays back in should have been sponsored by redbull because they were just like it was an extreme sport watching it you don't know what's going to happen when erin donald like jumped on him he got sacked six times i held my breath so that's actually that's actually the best out of the day for alex smith is that he got sacked six times i'm cool i'm cool with feeling nervous about it i was more talking to the people were like why is he doing this like this is so stupid this fucking idiot football guy like he's doing this for glory it's like no he loves playing

football he wanted to get back it is very prove it to himself it is very washington football team that the feel good story of their day was that their their quarterback didn't get another massive fracture in his leg after having 17 surgeries he also um the dwayne haskins thing is so weird now he had diarrhea big cat who dwayne haskins that's why it wasn't there today oh no no other reason it's he had a stomach virus but like kyle allen okay he scored a touchdown he was fine but alex smith again great story very happy for him he's not a starting quarterback anymore so you're basically saying like you can't make the argument that dwayne haskin haskins is worse than the other two guys so what's up uh well he had diarrhea today as i already said and and watching him out there

with diarrhea i would be more uncomfortable watching a man going through bubblegut than i was watching alex smith play on like half of a leg it's it's just bizarre because you said to yourself like oh they're doing it for the nfc east it's so it's everyone socks we're in a valuation mode we already said that the reveres in evaluation mode this year which means that we can lose every single game and it doesn't make a difference because we're not planning on winning anything but it is in retrospect it probably wasn't a good idea to draft a guy because your owner's son was friends with him mm-hmm and the cowboys have done but yeah it's not it's not a proven track record no and i'll be honest i want to dwayne haskins i was very excited when they drafted him mostly

because like he was a good quarterback in college and because he was a local guy in dc so my reasons for wanting him drafted were not i wouldn't call myself a like a draft nick mill kiper would get mad at me for my reasons wanting him on the team but i think uh best case scenario now it's like just try to trade him try to get a good rounder maybe josh rosen i think he had a second rounder josh rosen played one year yeah but his i would say that has since now in his second but he i don't think he's played 16 games yet no but i'm saying like it's too too it's another year into his contract i'm talking about by year by by games right but i'm saying the contract matters like if you're going to trade for a guy who you're hoping becomes a guy yeah like a guy who becomes a dude right you

like and josh rosen would probably be you know you got him in a second year going to second year maybe didn't pick up bad habits clearly dwayne hasson's been on the first football team for too long but if you were yeah well that's really how the market value is set it's like how long were you on the football team right and your value decreases at that point too long but i think dwayne haskins has played like he got was his five games into year two so if he went to another team and played a little bit this year it might be worth a second round pick if i if if the football team gets a second round pick for dwayne haskins i'll be happy with him i'll wish him the best and that's really the other thing that's the story being a football team fan is like my biggest highlights have been

rooting for guys that used to be on the football team yeah to do well when they get on new football the other thing that changes it and i might be way wrong but josh rosen like everyone's like oh well they're gonna draft kyler so like maybe the the cardinals are trading him not because he's bad but because they have someone else whereas the redskins have officially just been like he sucks yeah we don't like him so yeah so if they've they've they've sunk their own their own uh equity here yeah well that's what we do yeah we've done that repeatedly so what you're saying is his trade value would increase if we draft another quarterback that would be his replacement if you hadn't played another game right and well now you've already ruined it because you benched him for alex smith who well

no we we benched him for kyle allen yeah who actually played well when he was out there today he misplayed the whole thing like you needed to draft a guy while he was still the starter listen it's going to shock you to realize this but the football team has mismanaged yet another quarterback at this point i want to go back to week one when you were like this this team might be good listen we're a game and a half out of first true it's true we're in the hunt and right now in this season you never know i don't want to defeat us pft i want to i want to the this could be something special will it be crazy like if we win if we win six games this year we're going to be in the hunt we're going to be in that crap the entire nfce is going to be in the hunt really fucking with everybody's

playoff picture because you're going to see like the the one and twelve giants still being mathematically right at the end of the year are mathematically alive that would be that's huge for me as a football team fan yeah of course i always talk about the the if you can be if you can be in the graphic by uh you know after thanksgiving in december huge yeah that is huge i i i do want to say like i've i've moved on mentally as warren sharp advised me to have moved on from dwayne haskins i'm focusing now either on tre lance i know you like tre lance a lot right i just like the name it's a cool i just said tre lance a lot is he put that into bermans for three years from now here um or i want the 300 pound tight end from auburn yes he's sick that that wild patty was

running so good kyle pits is who you really want from florida he's an awesome tight end um the rams i i feel like they've played on the east coast every single week so suck for them i'm looking at their schedule right now they do have to play the dolphin so in like three weeks so i guess so just be back we need to talk about jared golf spike jared golf it was raining jared we love you despite what hank might say we love you it was raining you got to be in zone you're you know i'll say this say something nice about jared golf and tom brady and my fancy team and jared is my starter okay oh yeah well tom no doesn't know loyalty and is losing a little bit senile yeah i actually think that tom brady is is more senile than we think he thought that it was about to be the

start of the fourth quarter that's why i put the fours up he forgot that poor tom he probably got like water boarded by alex carrero after that game like you need to drink more water yeah your brain doesn't work anymore we're gonna flood you we're gonna we're gonna drown you in internally yeah but jared say something nice about jared golf spike the spike that he had where he basically like threw the ball straight up into the air was better than kirk cousins fumbles that he had yes it looked slightly better than those yes it's actually i just pulled up the game it says golf's td run is much better than his celebratory spike damn it was raining it was wet it's not hey guess what you got in the end zone you can do whatever you want once you get in the end zone all right next up bangles ravens

this game sucked uh it was just the ravens were in cruise control i felt bad for joe burrow he was getting the shit kicked out of them yeah aj green quit on the team that highlight what do i didn't see that one oh you didn't know he joe burrow threw an interception aj green probably couldn't have caught it but he didn't even try and then marlon humphries i think was the one who got it was running it back and aj green was standing next to him and he started running almost like he looked like he was looking to block someone to free like he had no interest whatsoever in tackling him when he was standing right next to him like a total i'm giving up on this season i'm giving up on this team i'm out see you later i'm gonna blame the football joe burrow said last week he didn't

you want to accept the game ball because that football had too many good plays left in it i think you just got a bad ball today watch this watch this all right tell me what you think okay all right all right yeah aj green see you do you see how he runs like just runs next to him yep it was so so bad so i don't know what the hell that's about um he's probably got a hurt ankle big cat he listen he just starts running right next to him it doesn't even want like he he turns like i don't want to have anyone he was guarding against the lateral he thought he thought that they were gonna try to look at the other way as well yeah um shut up to the ref though the best player in the game was the ref for avoiding uh marjaxen marjaxen yeah he was probably trying to

hit limar jackson and then fell down to the side because that's what defenders do when they try to tackle in the open field right it looked like they simultaneously tear both their patello tendons just crumpled to the ground that was that that was the highlight of the game was the ref falling down when limar jackson ran by him yes hank by the way if you want to get your swag back because you know cam newton's been out the patrists haven't played they lost the last you know to the chiefs you got to start the like patrists fan of thing of like well aj green we're going to trade for aj green aj green would look good in the patrists yeah because i think he does want to be traded rock and refuel baby yeah rock and refuel uh yeah this game sucked though the ravens are just

bet again follow the rule the ravens will ship pump inferior and pull opponents this was a never in doubt game where joe burrow had no chance because the ravens defense like they they're bullies the ravens are bullies i think the defense are also like to hit joe burrow yeah well because they might not like to they like to test them yeah they like to test them and they might just it might be a crime of opportunity because that often to line is it's just absolutely atrocious how much does it suck like i think patrick queen picked off joe burrow yeah how much does it suck like oh i'm i went from a national champion to a team that's going to be in the playoffs in like a one or two seed and you're on the bank how do the ravens they talk after the ravens always draft a player

where it's like oh yeah holy shit how is that guy still available that's a great pick from them yeah jk jk dobbins is awesome uh but yeah this game who cares who do the ravens have i want we need to start how the ravens play the eagles next that's that doesn't fall under my i think the eagles are a little too frisky to be like completely inferior in that respect i think they're gonna beat the eagles next week they don't play some bad teams until later in the season uh all right next up jaguars texans we were wrong by the way we have to put a little tickler about football tickler file on this we we bash romeo chronel as an interim head coach saying he doesn't have the pizzazz he doesn't have uh the pulse piss and vinegar i forgot two things one is he's three and one

now as an interim head coach so he's close he's teetering on being like we got to start putting on romeo chronel as an interim head coach two i forgot when he was the chief's interim head coach he beat the packers and broke their like 18 game win streak or 19 game win streak romeo chronel might be a good interim head coach he might be i but i think bill brine would have won this game i i think in this case it was more just like we don't have bill o brine anymore like it could have been literally anyone well and more than that i think it was they're the jaguars because the jaguars they were playing like i'm excited for maxion to come back the jaguars are maxion the the miss kicks they they missed two kicks and then because they missed two kicks they had to

go they went forward on fourth and like i don't know fourth and go from the eight and it was that hilarious fumble that was like what was this play what is going on they're just it's kind of getting sad and jack i think there's a pretty simple metric that you can look at when you're trying to figure out if a team is just like woefully bad or just a franchise if it's being run really really badly and that's uh how many consecutive years do they have an awful kicking situation yeah because it seems like good teams good franchises at the minimum they'll keep a kicker for three years right but teams like the jaguars or the football team going through kicker there they're kickers there they could have a jersey like the browns have for quarterbacks for all the kickers that they

cycle through and with the jaguars i think this is like their fifth or sixth ring kicker this this here it's pretty bad how i do think that that just bum philips hat in a headset could have probably won this game like i would have played harder i agree for a deadhead coach than for bill o'bride i agree i agree um so yeah the this was a stinker of a game again we had a few weird stinker games and this was one of them i don't really have anything else on it besides the fact that i don't know the texas gonna win a couple games now maybe texas are in the running for the best worst team yes my power rankings are the best worst teams tied at number one vikings and texas okay i think i think the charger should be in there i don't think that they're one of the worst teams though

but they're one in three yeah that's better better than the winless vikings or the vikings are they have one way they beat the texas so your rankings are kind of screwed up but the vikings lost today the texas won today so they're still tied at number one uh yeah the texas i don't know this is just weird stupid team and then to shon wasen is incredible half the time and then half the time he'll throw a wide open receiver right at their shins a million miles an hour how attractive of a head job head coaching job do you think the texas are compared to the falcons i don't know i think they they're they're more attractive but they you also have to i'd say more attractive Arthur blank doesn't fire people though like it

took him forever to fire dan quinn but he creeps you out all the time yeah but i would i would always take everyone says like you need a franchise quarterback you need an owner that's just way too stupid and loyal that always can play for me he would just i would get the goosebumps hanging out next to arthur blank imagine who can i schmooze more in the in the meeting with the owners because if you get the if you get the owner in your back pocket as an nfl head coach you can stay on forever yeah i don't know it really is the key be best friends with the owner he'll never fire you i just would not want to be best friends with arthur blank now that would be worse yeah but you'd also probably get to see like cool shit like you'd write a cool buck afterwards he'd probably it's like a

ghost tour every day you know what he probably does like when he's pulling out all the stops he's yeah he does a ghost tour of mercedes ben superdome he's like check this out i know it's sunday but i got the key to chick filet right he goes in makes you some chick filet but they're actually not chick filets like they're ghost they're actually poisoned and now you're under my spell right and you're never gonna you're never gonna go for it on fourth down from the ten yard line ever again it's actually their their baby fetuses and q and on is right out the door yeah i can see that yeah yeah uh all right dolphins 49ers um fits fits patrick like should the dolphins trade to a i was wondering i mean i'm joking but he threw for 350 yards and three touchdowns if the dolphins

go eight and eight what are you gonna start to an extra what if it's Patrick's a franchise quarterback i don't think that you can fuck he was so good and i don't know what's going on with the 49ers like that their hangover is officially the worst hangover ever well jimmy grapple was stunk out loud today and thank god he's coming back from injuries so you can be like well we brought him back too fast because if that was not yeah if you can do that he's not healthy we rushed him back you can save a little face because man was he bad i really don't see the difference between jimmy grapple and nick mullins and cj bather but there i say jay bather was bad too yeah they were all bad yeah you could start either one of them in any game and i don't think that the lines like

how how many points do you think jimmy grapple is worth like a starting healthy jimmy grapple a point yeah probably a point yeah they're essentially the same quarterback i mean if they had both just drives a nicer a nicer car yeah that's really what's killing them as their defense is just ravaged by injuries and i don't know i mean that's a that's an fc us is a miserable a miserable division to play in because every team is good or above the competent level so that was an ass kicking though 4317 it was never even close brian floris might be a good head coach i think he's a very good catch i think he might be a coach he doesn't have i mean they're building talent there but they're they are competitive in every game like they might lose games by a lot of

they might get blown but it's not you know when you watch a blowout but like they're trying and they're and they're fighting and they're not giving up like when they get when they lose badly they'll still have that and they've got some they've got a shitload of draft picks don't they they used a bunch this year but yes i think they still have texans draft picks yeah they last year they the micah fits patrick trade and also the um who's the bong guy larry tonsil larry tonsil gas mask yeah kind of a bunch that guy never gets covered yeah so the they they do i think they do have it and they have to uh they have to which i don't i think they should just double down trade to a get even more picks i'm looking at their uh yeah i mean they they have been in every

single game they were in that game against the patriot's week one they lost by three to the bills they are in that seahawks game till the fourth quarter yeah like they don't well when they were in every game when they were tanking last year there was still a team that was like okay we're gonna be competing we're gonna make it look like we're not tank there were some games last year where they got the shit kicked out but yes but for the most part they were like we're the team that's perfect at tanking imagine if the dolphins make the playoffs imagine if the dolphins with Fitzpatrick make the playoffs we could only be so lucky seven teams in they have the jets twice they have the Bengals that's that they have to play the Patriots and the Chiefs it's tough

and that's play the Rams fuck we need like two more bad uh the Broncos they have the jets twice the Broncos and uh the Bengals so that's four wins so now they're at six can they get i'll read you the rest of it can they get or say eight and eight maybe yeah eight and eight might not get no probably not in the AFC all right but let's all right so they need three more wins out of these opponents Rams at Cardinals Chargers they could beat the Cardinals Cardinals are a candy ass team yep Rams at Cardinals Chargers Chiefs Patriots at Raiders Bills they could get two more wins out of that yeah finish eight and eight yeah i think that they're good it's actually wow i'm getting excited for Fitzpatrick to maybe make the playoffs it's a fun thought experiment to be like

if you're the Dolphins and you clearly love amassing draft picks like you got rid of all you're always rebuilding as long as Bill Belichick is coaching in that division you can get away with being in rebuild mode for probably like four seasons without anybody really starting to figure out like hey you're not you're not really making any moves yet so if you keep Fitzpatrick as your starting quarterback and then you just get like a shit load of first round draft picks i think you could probably start fitzy for another like year year five years five years two or three years and then maybe draft another quarterback behind him he beats that guy out because there's not there's no rookie that's going to show up and be able to beat Ryan Fitzpatrick out in training

camp because i'm convinced that Fitzpatrick knows how to like act like he's being a good mentor right to the young guys but secretly trained them wrong as a joke to fuck them up and you have to trust him because he went to harvard exactly so there you go uh prime Fitzpatrick in the playoffs for the dolphins let's make what's actually find that bet on the barcels sportsbook and let's go in on the dolphins to make the playoffs like it could happen i could see i could see nine and seven they've been in every game yeah nine and seven might not get them in the afc is so tough that raiders game is gonna pretty much be decided because you look if you look at the afc right now the entire afc north has four four wins except for the the bangles there's three teams they're four one

are better and then you still you know the the titans the cults the chiefs the raiders the bills the patriots i mean there's fuck come on dolphins we might become a dolphins podcast they're pretty fucking fun to watch they're fun to watch they're very fun to watch Fitzpatrick is fun to watch uh watch him go out and throw six picks next week that's fun yeah but it's gonna suck for our dolphins future that we haven't put in yet John Gruden what about the bills what you got a lot of dogs in the afc east well yeah we like well the bills are the bills are like uh our greyhound the dolphins are our mutt like the bills are our labrador the dolphins are our little fucking mutt that we found behind a trash can they're rescue hank yeah the the the bills are

beautiful you know what happened beautiful golden retriever with beautiful hair that we just brush all day and this little yapping dog comes and shows up i'm like you got spunk we'll let you hang out yeah you know what happened we were just fostering the dolphins for a while and they grew on us we're trying to find a good home for him try to pass him off try to make jake really fall in love with his his native dolphins and we just realized we love them too much to let him go and then also i like the Steelers but whatever uh okay before we get to the next game uh i was wondering these days are long is there a way to chill out like just chill out do you ever just chill out i got a great way to chill out you do yeah fuck yeah give it to me it's 3g 3g is a perfect way to chill out

if you're looking to take a quiet night in recoup on some sleep if you're looking to just chill out watch a movie i got the perfect recipe for you it's 3g 3g is the leader in hemp derived cannabinoid products their products are formulated by biochemists they're made in the us with usa grown hemp they have delta 8 thc it's a federally legal version of thc it's a perfect hybrid of cbd and the standard delta nine stuff that you guys have been smoking it gives you a similar buzz and all the medicinal effects of delta nine but it doesn't give you the laziness you don't have the anxiety you don't have the paranoia you don't have the mental fogginess tom brady had been smoking some 3g in uh in the fourth quarter he would have realized exactly what the down in distance was

delta eight users are far more active they're far more outgoing with increased confidence almost none of the anxiousness and the paranoia that you associate with delta nine usage delta eight again it's a federally legal version of thc it's a perfect substitute for anyone who uses delta nine that wants the same great feeling without the negative side effects it's going to have you feeling amazing you're going to be functional you're going to be clearheaded you're not going to be lazy you're not going to be paranoid 3g is not just the best in the delta eight industry they invented the damn industry it's a hundred percent hemp derived it's available online at 3g that's the number three chi.com and that select retailers all around the country have to be 21 to purchase

go to 3g.com that's the number three chi.com shop for their vapes the gummies the tinctures and the oils that's the delta eight stuff that's what you want to get you can make your homemade edibles with them and we're going to give you a five percent discount when you use promo code pmt at checkout promo code pmt check out get five percent off your order you have to be 21 to purchase that's 3g chill out all right uh so we got two games left browns cults of course court cody parky doing someone in did you see cody parky after he after he kicked the ball he was watching it like a hawk it hit the first upright and everybody else like started to celebrate because they knew that it was bouncing off and going in cody's eyes were locked on that ball making sure it did not

hit the crossbar and it was it made it by like I don't know seven eight yards so where was that what we needed it but uh yeah the browns first four and one starts since 1994 uh when bill bell checking nick sabin were on the coaching staff um it's crazy it's crazy the browns might be good they look good we're gonna find out next week against the stealers they look really good well here's a fun stat i saw this from nick carns on twitter he said baker mayfield has officially surpassed ben roethlisberger as the winningest active quarterback at first energy love it cleveland there we go cleveland back hell yes finally so that game is going to be awesome what i don't like is the sad brown stats that are starting to become normal again so the sad brown stats that

we're all used to are like oh this is the first time that you know the browns have won in october at home since 1974 whatever you know they always have these ones that like we're all right way way far back foreign ones since 1994 yeah today the big sad brown stats were like oh that's the first pick six that they've given up so or that's the first pick six that they've returned since all the way back in week 15 of last year they're starting to become normal again right and i missed the sad brown stats we gotta hold on if you have any good sad brown stats please send them our way because i need to i need to hold on to that for a little bit yes i agree um so the browns might be good like they have an mo we talked about it last week they run the ball they had a balance attack

baker made a couple mistakes but he also i think threw for over 250 so guess what the in miles garrett is so good their defense the brown defense is not great but miles garrett is one of the best players in the nfl yeah so it like i would rather have a defense it's not good with one exceptional player than a defense that's just like all across the board because at least miles garrett you can you can have a game where it's like oh he's just gonna wreck shit yeah so last week uh the defensive scheme that they were running had basically your standard four down lineman and for whatever reason they were double teaming every single pass rusher except for miles yeah it was the the cowboys game yeah the cowboys game they're double teaming everybody except for miles garrett today they

said let's get fucking crazy with it and they brought out this weird formation a couple times where they put all their down lineman way off to the side like starting on the outside shoulder of the of the guard and then just had miles garrett go up against three guys be like we're gonna force you to at least double team miles garrett maybe even triple team so we can get like one of these other guys to get something yeah we just live here verna and miles garrett needs to feel respected enough to be on the receiving end of a double team every now and again but yeah smart he is uh he's really good stafansky i think smart is a smarter he's a smarter person no he's smart freddy kitchens yeah he's smart he's way smarter than freddy kitchens so i yeah the browns are good the

browns are good and at the colts i don't know i mean they they didn't have derrius lettered who's you know you can't judge the colts defense without derrius lettered out there i i think the colts are decent but phil rivers still he's phil rivers he's old he's phil rivers he was screaming i if you had to buy if you had to buy one team and obviously we're playing just the results from this this game but if you had to buy one team higher ceiling this year i think it's the browns yeah the only problem with the browns is their division yeah their division is tough and this game against the stealers they're in third place right now huge huge huge huge we do like the browns so the browns are another one of our teams yeah so now we've got 12 12 afc

playoff half of the afc and uh i feel confident can we just please get phil rivers miked up for every game you can put it on a live stream because you know he's not going to cost yep he's not going to say anything inappropriate he might i he's probably like talking trash to odell beckham like you got a bunch of mess i heard you like to get messed on your chest heard you like heard you like the ladies that defecate all over you you're sorry you're sorry there's no way he knows that story oh he does no he doesn't because phil rivers is a great trash talker he's not on no he's not online enough there's no way i think that story i don't think they say it in front of phil rivers out of respect for a father of 12 14 no i'm sure he just silently sits there and kind of

like shakes his head but like doesn't you know well you know but i bet you phil rivers can't even imagine wait someone shitting on someone's chest and he thinks it's like all like a joke like a tiktok he's like is that some tiktok these poop on each other he makes a girl just take a stinky on your nipples that's like a that's weird man that's the oh that was jerry jones john gruden that's weird that's weird man mixed him to me make the only thing i always picture phil rivers when he's screaming i just assume that he's saying y'all sorry y'all the smartest team we ever played your accents always end up either jerry jones or my green reward or deli or deli or deli um all right he took a it took a sheet on

yes weird cowboys giants to finish it off dak uh we're not even cowboy's fans and we feel bad for that as a football team fan we so we went i just want to say that like i'm rooting for dak yeah we found the ultimate though because we've been making this joke for many years about uh people whenever there's a horrific injury they have to chime in and say listen i root for the eagles but even i feel bad for dak like thank you for qualifying how hard it was for you to have basic human emotion to feel bad for someone's ankle that was sideways on national television within about five seconds there were there were representatives from every single team yes hey packers fan coming in peace here just get not in front of

i'm very sorry i hope for a full recovery but i found the ultimate the we reach a new level i said to myself you know there's a lot of people who have been taking a stand saying they're not watching sports anymore and there were i started retweeting people who don't even watch football anymore but they heard about dak instantly and they feel bad yeah and they want to send their prayers uh listen i don't watch the sports ball uh but even as somebody that doesn't pay attention athletics i don't feel bad for a man who's hurt ever since calling cappernick got blackballed or ever since they started kneeling you get both sides yeah i don't watch this sport but i happened to have cbs on at like five o'clock this afternoon and i saw dak's ankle go sideways but you know i

i just want to say my my thoughts are pressed skip balas is like listen i'm not a fan of mental health but i still feel bad for dak press guys hurting himself or like uh skip it first of all skip balas was he was all over the map today he didn't know how to handle his emotions well he had because brahman yeah and this yeah he was thinking ahead to later on that night i think skip balas what he really wanted to tweet was like you thought dak was depressed before yeah you listen i'm gonna get in trouble for this but dallas cowboys quarterbacks can't break their ankles that's what skip wanted to say yes yes it's um so it sucked but adi dalton came in and adi dalton i'm happy and he altons back in our life and he dalton should be decent on this cowboy's team like andy dalton

the bug boo with andy dalton is always he's one of those guys and we've talked about him he's like the Kirk cousins you can list a bunch of guys who you basically make the argument if everything's right they can be good everything on the offensive side the ball maybe they're offensive line but he has every single weapon he's got the best weapons he's ever had he's got a great running game everything should be okay for andy dalton to actually thrive and he made a great pass and a great catch by michael gallup who's like the unheralded star there cowboys are two and oh and andy dalton games he's the perfect mic microthik quarterback because he will take all the shit that you throw at him like mic microthik can scream at him and treat him like just a pile of mud and andy dalton

will never publicly go up against his head coach he'll never get into like a spat because you imagine adi dalton winning a soup bowl with the dallas cowboys i still think he looks weird actually i was going to say it looks weird in the helmet the visor looks pretty slick on it yeah that's it's andy dalton 2.0 i do feel bad for dak though that sucks yeah it sucks just because he's a fun player to watch um and then yeah i mean the cowboys i don't know where they get their defense he they made the giants look competent offensively which is very hard to do the giants i turned to you guys i would say probably two minutes in the second quarter the giants had 17 points that was the most points they scored all year in a game two minutes into the second quarter that's what the

cowboys do for you and joe judge i'm sure he's got to look in the mirror and uh get back to the blue collar ways but the new york jets and the york giants for the first time ever they're combined oh and ten to start the season giant's got to bring the lunch pail that's what joe judge has to do he has to issue team lunch pails and install one of those clock in clock out things at the facility bring it back to the blue collar ways i will compliment daniel jones he is an incredible in zone throwaway quarterback when he's within 15 20 yards of the goal line and he doesn't like his first read he's putting it between the uprights well he's throwing it nine 10 yards up well that's because he also his clock his internal clock is the worst of all time he he just stands there

that's why he always fumbles so he'll stand there and everyone will be covered for a good eight minutes and then he'll be like okay now i'm going to launch it yeah nothing there's there's nothing that hits quite like a daniel jones throwaway he is he's probably the best quarterback in the nfl at doing that he's got a rock arm i did see um a new species out in the wild on twitter related to the duck injury the person who says i just saw the duck injury but i'm not going to post it here yes so we're not i'm not going to repost it but i just want you to know it's terrible i just watched the duck injury please don't tweet it out yes i'm not going to repost it that was for your service not smashing the retweet button on a guy's fibula poking through his leg that was uh

all time with with tony roland being like maybe it's just a cramp and then like we like we don't want to show this again as they showed it again in slow motion um you gotta watch it as we i think we've had this discussion but the first one i i vividly remember willis mcgay remember when willis mcgay he's he and they didn't have like replays like they do now so that was uh oh my god how the fuck did that happen i mean this was like the year 2000 so no they didn't but they didn't replay it like from 17 different angles no we got we got like one one anglisten back in my day we got one replay of willis are you saying that's not true and we liked it are you saying that's not no you're absolutely right but with the duck press got thing yeah they they showed it to us i think that people

should watch the replay too or they should watch it because if you're going to enjoy football like you need to know what they do go through like what's what can happen to somebody on any given play to understand they like it puts into perspective his uh his contract discussions that he was having like oh you're doing like a human thing no i'm saying like you should watch it no i'm watching it because i like to watch gruesome things okay i'm saying you yeah like i watch like skateboarders like break their legs that's that's i watch those videos it's way funnier when somebody gets their leg broken for free than it is like on sunday at that point i take it very seriously yeah no i'm just like travis do a rail grind and like a stop sign splits open to screw it

um that's fucking fun no listen neck injuries no thank you uh but any type of uh broken bone puke video impalement non-life threatening i'll watch it i'll replay it shout out shout out to mike nolyn he moved to the sidelines yeah so like nolyn moved down to the sidelines today didn't well they won the game he's gonna move back up they won uh maybe moves to the other sideline that would work my big question and stands over the opposing offensive coordinators shoulder i was gonna say coach is the opposing defense that would probably yeah that would help out a lot but how bad must url thomas be how bad must his like current situation be if the cowboys haven't brought him in yet yeah it must be pretty bad because they brought in alton smith they

brought in greg hardy well he might be asking for too much money that might be it that might not have enough money that's that's actually not a bad i would imagine that's probably he's probably getting paid this year by the ravens right to a certain extent i don't know how that works i don't know how it works either yeah we're not fucking jerry jones there's a there's a chance that jerry jones doesn't know that url thomas is available yet someone needs to let him know because if url thomas showed up on sunday just wearing a cowboys uniform jerry jones would be like yeah we got a ball player yeah this is good we're in we're in it uh all right let's uh get to dion before we do that quick word from our sponsors whoop yeah whoop whoop we love whoop i'm wearing my whoop are you

wearing your whoop i'm wearing my whoop thank you wearing whoop yeah thanks for his big time i'm staying in shape and i'm using my whoop to do it uh you've heard us talk about whoop for a long time you know how much we love him i monitor my sleep every single night on here monitor my heart rate when i'm watching football my heart rate spikes up i actually need to go back and see what the highest that it's been over the course of like one football sunday i'm probably working out while i'm watching football on my couch uh that's how great this whoop monitoring is it tells you second by second minute by minute where your heart rate's at monitor strain it is a perfect tool for whatever you have going on in your life and they're proud to partner with barstool to host

a virtual charity 5k on october 26 supporting the md anderson cancer center that's kasey's treatment center during the breast cancer awareness month initiative they have going on their donation pages live if you go to barstool sports dot com slash whoop 5k help us raise money for md anderson if you don't have a whoop check out uh whoop with promo code take and you're going to get 15 percent off go to whoop that's wh oop dot com in a promo code take at checkout save 15 percent are you guys going to do the charity 5k i might do it i might do the charity 5k walking it who knows depends on what day of the week it is monday's i got monday night football Tuesday i have Tuesday night football wednesday's it's waiver wire day thursday's thursday night football fridays

i'm drunk saturday's i'm hungover sunday's i'll find i'll find a time that works for me i'll do the charity 5k for whoop for the md anderson cancer center so check them out promo code take it check out when you go to whoop dot com you're going to save 15 percent off sleep better recover faster train smarter and join our fight to help raise money for md anderson this october all right we now welcome on our friend colleague coach prime he's in the gym so are we what are you lifting no no i'm just casually just chilling are you trying to make a comeback because your falcons are godawful why i you know what i know what i did i know my mistake i believe and i think you guys do this sometimes on my picks i pick one way you know the football show i picked another

way okay and i wanted to be i wanted to do the same thing and when i call you this morning i said get off the valve it ain't no way they're not gonna win don't do it and you kind of talk me into stand because you question me anything like that i all right so what what happened what changed between earlier this week and this morning you just woke up with a feeling you're like oh it's sunday what am i doing betting on the falcons right what am i doing picking the falcons julio is not playing what am i doing it's no way they're gonna win against daddy bridgewater missed the consistency yes and dan quinn has officially been fired well has he got fired no there were like some reports saying it's likely to happen on monday or two they said like he's as good as fired

but i think they're gonna come into the office he hasn't been fully fired yeah i hate to hear it but you know it was coming it's almost worse than they did this way where it's like hey dan um we're not going to fire you yet you can come into the office and make all your arrangements and have that long sad commute in knowing that you're about to be fired wow so who's the interim is it right i yeah i don't announce it yet because i guess dan quinn still has the job technically technically as of this moment yeah they're saying now now people this this is my favorite part about the media today is that no one can wait till he's officially fired so the report is all but finalized that he is going to be fired tomorrow and everyone's just running with that yeah so he's fired he's

fine yeah yeah yeah he's gone uh let's talk about the biggest story though obviously his DAC press got the injury terrible terrible injury feel awful for him um you're watching that game what what were you thinking when when you see him go down and then the cowboy is being resilient and winning that game with Andy Dalton the first thing i was thinking about was i i i know when you're on that cart all those emotions are going through your mind and you're thinking to yourself man i probably should have took that long-term deal because how's this going to really play out you're all those stupid thoughts like that go through your mind i've been there done that it it goes through your mind like what's next are you going to ever be the same are you going to rehab

you're going to be as strong as you're going to be are you going to be as good all those thoughts are going through his mind yeah you know jerry jones pretty well i would imagine um i had i had the thought that jerry is at least at this stage in his life he seems to have kind of become you know very much a player's owner it would not shock me if jerry jones still made DAC a big contract offer this off season even knowing that he was in no DAC deserves a big contract go for first and foremost he he's earned it he deserves it but that's still a but you could have got more you you always think i could get more i went is enough enough so that's the thing that DAC is contemplating and he wanted to finish this year strong yeah and it's um it probably sounds

sounds callous i saw some people on twitter being like now's not the time to talk about DAC's contracting it isn't but you're absolutely right the human the human element of it is that's going through DAC's mind right now and you can't you can't play the what-if game the hindsight 2020 i will say this though the one part of today and as bad as DAC's injury was uh watching alex smith play has to give you like a little bit of hope of saying the injuries are not like they were 30 years ago this is not DAC Prescott is going to be back playing football at some point this isn't a career ender he will be able to play again and there's there's almost like uh kind of a beautiful you know you don't want to see a guy get hurt but a beautiful like

message in there like you saw alex smith come back after a horrific injury when DAC has a horrific injury today that alex smith is one of my favorites and to see how that played out and he got back in there i was i mean i was like yes yes that is wonderful i love it and to see how this thing is playing is going to play out with DAC and then you start thinking all the crazy thoughts that could go through management in the owner's mind like if the cowboys finish eight eight six and ten what do you do do you go in the draft are you allowed to be a free agent what what do you do see all those thoughts are gonna they're gonna circulate yeah do you think you got to wait every option do you think that andy dalton is the guy they're gonna ride with i mean it it was smart

in retrospect for them to go out and get andy because you know he has been a starting quarterback for it seems like 30 years in the nfl but based on the small amount that you saw out of him uh today you think they're gonna they're gonna ride with that or do you think they're gonna bring somebody else in as well well they got to bring another backup in just in case andy goes down but that was a great move like when you look at how it played out you're saying you did a good job steven jones a great job anticipating what could possibly happen happen and still get your team to a a guy that has started a numerous amount of games that can handle the attention of being a dallas cowboy quarterback and get the job done simultaneously yeah from a from a player

standpoint if you have a teammate suffer an injury like that how do you move on from it does it take like do you have a short like quick discussion about and then you say okay let's put that aside we'll deal with it later how do the players get really focused at that point without you know thinking too much about the fact of you know we just saw our starting quarterback go down with a severe ankle injury well it's tougher because it's your leader it's it's it's a guy that you have hope in a guy that that you follow a guy that is the face of your franchise so it's a little tougher when it's that guy but you gotta you gotta buckle back up and play the next play like it never happened that's the thing about professional sports guys get hurt in practice

that guys get hurt in preseason guys get hurt on just freak accidents and incidents all the time so the show must go on that's the mentality yeah the um the other big take where I had from uh this sunday is the 49ers your other team uh now they have a ton of injuries but it does feel like the Super Bowl hangover or the you know the curse of losing the Super Bowl kind of feels real here where it's a snake bit in year you every time you went to Super Bowl you won it but do you believe in a team getting there following short and then the next year having a hard time getting back up to that level no no I don't the thing about it whenever you win even if you didn't win the Super Bowl but you won and made it to the Super Bowl you lose players you you you lose kind of that that

hunger that thirst um some guys because some guys blow up in the offseason and they start getting better deals and off the field endeavors and they got us to really stay focused the nucleus of your team has to stay focused they're there they have a lot of injuries man and tell me what happened with Garoppolo did he get benched yeah yeah he threw two of the worst picks non-curve causing division yeah that's that's why we got to be careful with putting seeds on these guys chest how do you bench a captain well you can say I would imagine Kyle Shanahan it's not a benching of he's benched going forward it's a he's coming back from an injury this is just my my guess he's coming back from an injury we're down 30 points or whatever 25 points uh I'm not gonna

let him get injured more let's sit him down this game's a wash let's go to the next week that's my guess yeah but you're down by 30 you're down by 30 because he has something to do with it yeah I'm just sitting up there thinking as a teammate how can we pay a god 20 to 30 meal and you bench him and he's the captain and I gotta and you want me to look up to him yeah how how in the world is that fashionable well in in hockey it happens a lot if there's a goal center that's having like a bad game you know like sometimes you get you got the hips you have a bad day but in football it's like with a quarterback position it means a lot more if you take that person out of the game you're sending a message to that person saying like we don't think that you're

the guy that can get it done and then it becomes a big question who's going to start the next game whereas in hockey I think it's more like okay we can accept the fact that players have bad days sometimes but if you're Jimmy Garoppolo like this is it's got to be sticking in your head like that's it's embarrassing what happened to him today and I don't know if he's going to be able to bounce back if or if they're going to have like an open competition between him Nick Mullins and CJ Bethard next week but it makes you think about okay because last year there was talking to off season that they did entertain the Brady situation they entertained some other situations now you're thinking okay however this plays out are you going to entertain other situations in college

situations in offseason because it seems as though you're not 100 sold on your quarterback it's no way you bench a 20 to 30 million dollar quarterback yeah yeah no it's true it's a weird spot to be in now for the 49ers like that locker room is going to be very interesting on uh Tuesday whenever they get back um Deion I had one last question we joke about this all the time chief's losing to the Raiders is there such a thing as a blueprint game not really there's a there's a matchup game like some people just really match up good against other teams some coaches have history against other teams just like Alabama Ole Miss right okay that you know those coaches got history man and they just match up well Gruden has history there with Andy Reed right it's true it's a good

point and they do have the offensive line in the running game that can you hope take the the air out of the game against Patrick Mahomes so no blueprint game just a matchup game just a matchup coaches being very familiar with one of one another scheme in the timing of it man that that's what happens sometimes it happens wait so as a coach yourself do you if you know uh you know the opponent if you know the opponent really well do you start playing mind games with yourself where you're like I know them they know me they think I'm gonna do this but then I'm gonna do the opposite but then they think I'm gonna do the opposite so I'm gonna do the original thing now now you're beating yourself you just go with your strength uh-huh that's how I would do it it's like playing

rough paper scissors shoot you just get paralyzed with thought there you go and I can't do that I just gotta go with my strength I'm excited for the takes that are gonna come out saying is it a good thing that the Chiefs lost this early in the season that way that way they don't have to worry about going 16 and oh everybody talking to him you know later on in the season oh you got the perfect season going because then you start thinking about that too much and then that plays mind games with you what about the dirt dolphins man yeah come on man they're good they're good feisty the dolphins are good they're not good they're not good they're just for good today Brian Flores is a good coach that's a fact yeah he's he's got a man he's got a bad roster and uh they're rebuilding

and he's it feels like the dolphins every couple weeks they're in one of these games where it's like whoa what are the dolphins doing man they look good it fits magic baby yeah that's right still going have you ever been pump faked out by a quarterback like 13 yards downfield like Fitz he likes to throw that pump fake like he's going to attempt to forward pass after he's already gotten the first yeah as a defensive back did you ever bite on that yeah yeah unbelievable you wouldn't bite on that would you I'll be playing man to man anyway I won't come up here anyway all right Tion thank you as always get that lift in uh appreciate it I'm gonna try to find you getting pump faked I'm gonna post that hey who's winning the night see hi yeah oh no there's no

there's not a gate there's no basketball heat culture market right now I'm saying it right now the game start right now heat by 12 I didn't even know there's a basketball game on games on right now no no that's not right I got baseball and football that's all I see yeah you're blind all right see you Dion crucial catch oh by the way speaking crucial catch did you see Mike Tomlin sweatshirt today no I meant to bring this up in the Steelers recap every team puts out like their version of the cancer awareness raising money for cancer charities sweatshirts and they all say different things on them usually it says like for example with Washington says like Washington football team it's like the tie-dye colors on it uh Pittsburgh just said Pittsburgh is stronger than cancer

oh they've had that for a while yeah that's that's such an alpha sense yes I imagine that they're like probably three or four dozen yinzers that travel abroad every year and they like land in paris and they're just wearing a shirt that says Pittsburgh is stronger than I imagine there are a few yinzers who um unfortunately get diagnosed with cancer and when the doctor says it they're like but you don't understand I'm from Pittsburgh cancer's a jag off yeah like there's no like I did you check my ID when I came in they just put on pick and they're like well we have this great treatment center well I can just put on I can just put on the sweatshirt yeah I put french fries in my sandwich I got this like don't worry about it doc uh all right let's get football guy the week

football guy the week presented by Phil Tsaroko one blade the only tool that can trim edge and shave any length of hair pick up especially marked one blade barstool pack nationwide where you could win up to a thousand dollars to the barstool store and if you have your own football guy look we want to see them tweet your funniest game day facial or body hair looks to part of my take app pardon my take using trim it to win it for a chance to win a special PMT experience like playing a round of Mario Party sitting in on episode recording or watch a thursday night football game with us we'll be choosing a new winner once a month your style made simple Phil Tsaroko one blade make sure you vote and tweet us trim it to win it hashtag trim it to win it at pardon my

take uh thank you to Phil Tsaroko our Phil Tsaroko one blade football guy of the week Jake give us the nominees all right Jake sorry about your heat it's okay game seven tuesday night bigger things in life are you going to be watching game seven tuesday night or game three of the alcs which one will be on the main tv i'm going to be prepping for our soul streams ping pong for thursday oh wow i just even got he even got him doing the plugs moving forward i just want to say like the real winner we should give credit you know you can talk about the champion or whatever you want to do but it's bigger than basketball at this point they didn't have a single confirmed coronavirus test for the entire time they were in the bubble no cocoa i i think that that is

more noteworthy than whoever happened to win the title this year we can all agree on that right like it would almost be selfish for a team to want to win the championship and take the shine away right from the league's effort right combating a global pandemic yeah all right fun the job football guy of the week starting off Phil Tsaroko steelish man advanced mcdonald who said he'd rather block he said he'd rather block all game than catch one ball yeah that is a very heath Miller thing to say love it um Notre Dame offensive tackle he's Miller and Todd heap were the same person we can agree on that too no Todd heap no because Todd heap we got introduced to him in in uh at hard knocks great all-time neck Todd heap but then he was always injured he was a warrior

he was out there for a while but yes yes mcdonald every time you see him easy thank you yeah Notre Dame offensive tackle Liam Eichenberg because you tweeted this out he continued to play in the irish his game versus florida state despite suffering a brutal eye injury his eye was completely shut how many beers uh no i don't think well no i don't think you'd have to like take a mallet to your dick to get it in there how how thin of a penis would it take it would have to be a piece of paper micro penis yes breath is his entire face it looked like he got smashed with a brick it was crazy and he played well he couldn't open his his entire left eye georgia quarterback Stetson Bennett after georgia's went over Tennessee he said quote i think we

covered tonight so that's good and quote that's i can imagine i can imagine the compliance officer running into yeah not so nice but yeah they did cover yeah Stetson Bennett excellent quarterback name yes and then pan is the fourth two i think panthers though c joe brady he tweets one and oh after every carolina win and nothing else since the season started love the last three tweets last that is i like that twitter that's not football guy i think but he only uses it to tweet one and oh i like that yeah so i would vote on the poll i'm trying to think yeah i'm sure it's a thing where that's like he probably has an agent that's like oh you know you're a coach you got to be on social media yeah all right you are recruiting i'm going to be on social media like

i'm just going to tweet i would say that it's a bit like i'd almost rather have like coach oh his wife his wife ran a twitter account and all he she was tweeting every week was just one and oh his foundation ran it yeah the joe brady foundation that helps kids in something that's it all right help kids win national championships at lsu yes who's back in the week do we should we i so my talk about the lakers winning the NBA my who's back in the week we did do that we already talked about it everyone you know people been saying whether or not he's the goat i've had some personally some not great things to say about him he won a championship today which i think is pretty much undisputed as the goat so congrats to raffin the doll won the french open day

number 13 number three doesn't count red clay raffin is a ring unless it's in a bubble trophy on any other service besides clay it's a cheat code for him no he's one other he's 20 barely he has 20 he wins all the fucking clay ship a world championship is a world championship unless it happens in the bubble everyone knows that how the joker do he lost to him yeah six loves six two seven five yeah oh my god straight sets big start with straight sets and pop bottles raffin on the doll all he does is win fucking he's cool but rude he's just clay clay clay clay no he's the goat all right corona bro yeah i'm just pure to go clay he's one dude he's one one two 20 majors 13 i roll in garrison 13 i roll in

garrison 13 out of 20 on clay dude 20 20 and two is his record whatever 20 yeah it's a cheat code for him he owns a spin it seven majors is nothing to scoff at he has more than seven no i'm saying it's 20 total oh yeah and well how many is jokovic have now probably like nine oh you're so wrong no less than 17 and he's like 10 years younger this is the point you guys can keep saying all you want well the fact is jokovic didn't better go up against federer in his prime yeah now you're just doing this this post no it's true no he's beating them every time they played him they don't better have to beat each other one who's one you have a feather is on the front i don't know this stat this stat i do not know this stat could go against me 29 27 joke no in the okay thank you

no no against federer in uh championships in in jokovic for a major championship in major championships yeah finals whatever i this could go against me i don't know my tennis i don't even like jokovic i watched one wimbledon and i decided that i like that guy and i like the debate didn't rafa win like the greatest one it was just the debate match the debate is why i don't even like tennis i break or i like the debate everyone always talks about that the debate is all i want and i think rafa ended the debate today no he didn't an unquestionable goat he didn't talk to me in five years all right my who's back of the week is shirtless jerry smith shirtless jerry smith's back i'm not sure why he's shirtless but he hasn't had his shirt on for 12 hours now so uh shout out

to shirtless jerry smith how he wins something no he's just happy so how how big of a party do you think jerry smith is going to personally have upon getting to exit the bubble like for what he's going to go fucking nuts for what he's going to be celebrating not being in the bubble anymore oh yes i agree he's probably going to get a bong a bubbler made to recreate what the bubble looked like the disney wild world wide world of sports yes and just have it permanently installed where his fireplace should be i agree um all right my who's back i have two one is uh jason kid being a great coach because uh i don't know who won tonight but i know jason kid was on staff so he was in the finals um clearly a mistake by the box to fire that guy absolutely because

he now has a ring as a coach not a head coach but a coach still that's got to piss people off flags fly forever yeah and jeonis's brother has one too yes that's right that's right um and then my other who's back is teams not being back big weekend for the teams not being back texas and miami lose uh miami got the shit kicked out of him texas came furiously back and fell short against oklahoma we'll have to just wait till next year we got 11 6 joker and grand slam matches oh not in their bronze in a row yeah not so you padded interesting padded his stats that's interesting once roger 11 once roger federer's brain starts to melt out of his ears like tom brady wow his stats by beating him wow 11 so six before that it was six to five when it really counted oh wow

including this year's all see open straight sets in the semi-finals how embarrassing must that be why was it one of us should be doing a 65 year old roger federer start 20 14 the last time okay fed beat jokovic in a grand slam is 2012 oh wow so 2014 roger federer was like 32 years old so to say that that's not his prime he's like 36 at the point nope that's not true five set thriller wimbledon finals when it started six in a row damn that's too bad um yeah and then the lakers won whatever do you have a who's back brooks like what it would happen oh yeah he's back he's physically yes a master's coming up what do you have to say about your heat you got to give him some kind of credit i was telling you let's do let's talk about the heat yeah heat really won yeah i mean no one

expected them to get this far jimmy is a star he's not going anywhere hopefully the rest of his career he's literally probably not going in he's probably not leaving the bubble he's going to stay in the bubble until he makes like 303 pointers and what were the i asked the honest coming through people who are going to get mad at us for not talking about the mba finals but honestly talk about in the game i have to and i also like i don't know how to feel about the mba finals until the ratings come out once the ratings come out and i can see how many people watched it and how popular it was then i will tell you if it was a good finals room you know how many people watched in person zero right so that's the most we did right eastern conference yeah and these but

i i i'm a ratings guy like i can't enjoy a sport unless i know a lot of people are also watching it like if there are less people watching it than last year i'm out hank as much as i hate him i did this is the fact that this is a conversation is funny but svp had him on lebron after and the new debate is now would 35 year old lebron be 28 year old lebron good let them fight each other i say lebron said 35 would but well with the advancement of hgh i say yes 35 year old lebron would definitely win i say yes he's like a fucking x-man at this point he's got more dad strength yeah taco tuesday i'm just happy for caroo show and kate my man kcp javale yeah dwight recurring guest don't you guys never liked the white don't like dwight kcp kuzma

fuck no dude i love kuzma fuck that whatever lebron let's see if you can win it with fans that's all i gotta say i don't know i think lebron probably it was easier on him knowing that fewer people were watching at home i really just wanted a game seven because i was like maybe we get a coin flip maybe we get the bachelorette oh i guess that segment has come back yeah but no we're gonna tape early on tuesday fuck that what lebron say about like he wants we have that respect or something like that oh the NFL game if the NFL game happens we will what if you want more respect lebron said i want my damn respect too who isn't giving him respect no one seriously like no one no one do people do the lebron hater do the lebron lovers do the uh what is it

sexuals they know that we're we've never like we got beat i still think mj is better but like lebron's incredible yeah he's won four titles what can you say uh king's fucking insane king say king skippalus immediately tweeted out yeah writing he tweeted out mj and then a million greater than signs lebron yeah i'll always say better but i understand finals like two years ago when he beat the Celtics and that's when i was like fuck yeah it's been it's tough it's kind of been over for what once he won the the the ring in cleveland but that was after that well for me like as a Celtics fan it was like he kind of the big three kind of like it was back and forth yeah but then once he came back with the calves and then kept skull fucking the cell once he yeah once he won

the ring in cleveland it's kind of been over since then like he's it's all he's the second best player of all time that's really nice honestly it's great katie going to the warriors soft what could have been a potential big run i don't i don't agree with that i think he probably would have lost he lebron he's a here's what i'll say he has won a good amount but he is yes also a prolific loser he's like the roger federer of the nbs yes lebron enjoys lebron enjoys losing in the finals why would he do it so much he's done it six times he's only won four finals he clearly likes doing one more than the other takes his foot out the gas yeah all right that's the show you guys got a number you got a we got a uh someone fucking tweeted at me too i can't

even say now i go yes let me guys thanks for helping the lakers win because you kept saying 17 every time you said 17 every time 22 17 20 20 no 22 started been taken 20 to say do another 23 in j 52 some random guy today said 22 today oh okay i was like what do you mean 22 has been taken yeah yeah love you guys my fun animal fact of the day no no let's have billy do it billy what's your fun animal fact of the day uh guys uh my fun animal fact of the day is uh sometimes when you rub a toad's pussy enough it will turn purple because it died comes guys i got school love you guys let's have it again hey can you all play the dk diss track at the end what dk diss track he wrote

a diss track about me last week we talked about in the interview so i wrote a diss track on him to motivate him to greatness in sunday night football guess i think that it worked yes can we say that it worked yes it's like george kittles dad writing him a letter on uh on nfl sunday to motivate him might have to do this again sometime dk part of my creaking dk you're getting stuck like one of mixed in a salad so you can break her cousin's heart like a creep power ballad dying is having checked it's on like pft's being made and i just trying actually that's what i'm saying you live the planet big it's kind of like alarming i got six packs of purple that's how i'm drunk and i'm lean your hollywood your game translates to editing

seas we're good and get your popcorn like 1917 you letter twice at on this because you can't drop the eye disappoint your fantasy owner stuff when you're on a buy dk one of your problems you know jk dobbins only people until you finish was at paskin robbins into the talk missing celebration serbian