Pardon My Take - Ryen Russillo, Mt Rushmore Of Things We’ll Never Do And Brooks Koepka To The LIV Tour

Episode Date: June 22, 2022

Brooks Koepka has gone to the LIV tour and we give our punishment. (00:02:32-00:13:23) Stanley Cup Final is getting chippy and the Warriors Parade was very drunk. (00:13:26-00:19:40) Hot Seat/Cool Throne including balls and KD alpha’ing Big Cat. (00:20:32-00:35:52) Ryen Russillo joins the show to do the Mt Rushmore of things we’ll never do in life and then talk some NBA Draft. (00:37:32-01:49:24) We finish with Guys on Chicks (01:50:16-01:59:24)You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners. You can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. On today's pardon my take, we have our good friend Ryan Rosillo, the start of Mount Rushmore season. We're doing the Mount Rushmore of things that we'll never do,

things that we'll never do in our life. It's also Team Mount Rushmore, a little twist on this year's Mount Rushmore, which people are very excited about. Everyone's pumped about it. We also talk a little NBA draft with him, get some details on who's going to be the first pick and who he likes in the draft.

We have Hot Seat, Cool Throne. We're gonna catch up on Stanley Cup Final. Some other things happen in the sports world and we'll finish with guys on chicks before we get to all of that. Our friends at Visible are presenting sponsor. What would you do with the extra money you'd save from switching to Visible?

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PFT, who do you think the single most important pick of the draft is gonna be? Ooh, the Spurs are gonna fill the Patriots' role and they're gonna take somebody and be like, oh crap, I can't believe that somebody's slid to number nine. Yep, I'm gonna say, we talked about this with Racille, but my only wish and it will be my best pick is if the Nuggets can somehow pick Nicola Jovic.

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for as low as $25 a month. Comparison to a single line with unlimited data and other major carriers for plan and network details, see visible.com slash pod. Okay, let's go. Boy! Boy! Now in the street there is violence

and then a lot of stuff work to be done. No place to hang out or wash in and then I can't wave all on your side. Oh no, we're gonna rock it down to electric, I brand new. And then we'll take it higher. Oh, we're gonna rock it down to electric. It's a part of my take, presented by Varsal Sports. Welcome to part of my take, presented by Visible.

Go to visible.com slash pod. Get unlimited single line wireless for as low as $25 a month. Today is Wednesday, June 22nd. And has there been any news with the live tour recently? Yeah, I saw that Colin Morkow is not going to the live tour. There was a lot of speculation. People were throwing stones ahead of the time

and he is not going to the live tour even though he may have scrubbed his bio. Max Homa tweeted out embarrassed faced emoji, money bag emoji, money bag emoji. He's also not going to the live tour. We had Matt Fitzpatrick on the show today. He's gonna be coming up on Fridays. Pardon my take, US open winner.

Not going to live tour. Well, we didn't ask him. Well, we alluded to him. He was like, nah, guys, no, no way. So I think that just wraps up the live tour. You forgot any addition. Whoa. Abraham Anster.

Oh, what a scumbag. So he's... Yeah. I've been thinking about the live tour a lot recently though. Yeah, he laid on me. Well, so we were very mean to Bryson DeChambeau, right? We really, really laid into him in a coma of fat, steroid, addicted loser

that had to pay for all his drugs. And that's why he joined the live tour. But I was thinking about, he's a guy with a family. He has to make what's in his best financial interest. And if you wanna play the game where you find out where all the money's always coming from, you're never gonna be 100% clean. So I've decided that we should be nicer to Bryson

about his choice. Because really, who's to say, if somebody were to offer any of us that money, what we would or wouldn't do. And you know, some of these guys have like family members that are playing on this tour. Right, you wanna be with family. It's probably a cool thing.

Yeah. Yeah, just got married. Yeah. Have a family that they're working on. Well, except for Charles Barkley, he said that he would kill a relative if it meant that he could get $200 million to play golf on the live tour.

Wow. Actually, that's good for Aaron Rodgers. They should sign Aaron Rodgers, he would too. I mean, he's probably knowing Aaron Rodgers, he's probably running the live tour. Yeah, so there might have been an addition in someone we know, Brooks Kepka on the live tour now. What are we gonna do?

Well, I don't, we, I feel like we have to act and act swiftly. Yeah, so yeah, I think so too. I think we, I had an idea. I think that he's a member of the Blake of the Year Club. He is. And just like Jay Moynihan, the president of the PGA tour, who's coming down swiftly, I think what we have to do

right now is suspend Brooks Kepka from Blake of the Year competition upon appeal. Yeah, so we're going to grant him an opportunity to appeal to this suspension. And by that, he's going to come on part of my take. And explain to us. And then we'll reevaluate at that. Right now, he's still available for shake of the year.

But we might consider re-entering him into the Blake of the Year contest, but he just needs to explain it to us. Yeah, so right now he's out. You know what? Credit to us. He just came down. Can we clap?

Can you guys clap? Can you guys clap? I think we're addicted to... We came down very hard on Brooks right there. I feel like we're addicted to suspending people. Yeah. It is great power. Isn't it?

It feels good. Yes, it is. Yeah, he's suspended. Why are you chuckling like that? Yeah, you want to suspend it? You want to tase? You want us to sussie you? Do you guys want to sussie you?

You're right, you can sussie you. No, it is weird because obviously people know our relationship with Brooks and they're like asking us to have a statement. I don't know. We're not close enough to Brooks to be like, hey, dude, don't do that. Yeah.

Maybe I should tell him that. Be like, hey, we, as part of my take, would prefer you not to do this because I think we all agree. We'd prefer him not to go to the live tour. But we can't control him. No, we can't. Live is live. Live is live.

Live and let live. Yeah. And right now it looks like... I feel like this is like 3D chess that Saudi Arabia is playing right now. They're driving up gas prices so high. It's tough to not say yes to all the money that's promised to them on the live tour.

If they get gas up to like $20 a gallon, Caldmore Cow is going to go over there too. Yeah. Yeah, so yeah, I'm not a fan of the live tour. I wish Brooks had not gone to the live tour. But again, I don't know how I can stop him from going to the live tour. Now, are they going to give him a new team?

Because it looks like the teams are stacked. If they make it, what if there's a part in my take team on the live tour and we get a cut off it? In. Yeah. And you guys, the listeners can suspend us. Yeah. For a couple of episodes pending approval.

Yeah. Or pending appeal. Yeah. We'll hear our own appeal. Yeah. And we'll just take a break. I mean, I said I've been watching the live tour since it started.

I will continue to watch it. You are a huge live tour fan. On the live tour fan, I'm just like, put sports in front of me. If they're entertaining and good golfers, I'll probably tune in. Yeah. Especially if it's free on YouTube. It is always funny, though.

And I know that. Roger Goodell is the most corrupt, evil human being on planet Earth. And I still watch NFL. That's true. Good point. He is Roger Goodell, Saudi Arabia, shaking hands. Yes.

Same people. It is always funny, though, because we do, people want us to. But ESB is talking about it. Yeah. But look, we already said something. We banned him from Blake of the Year upon appeal. Like, that's how could you be? What other power do we have?

That's the strongest thing we can go down on. We came down very hard. We gave him the maximum suspension. That is. On part of my take. We've never done that before. Actually, it's unprecedented to kick somebody out of Blake of the Year.

Now, of course, he does have recourse, because he's a member. He's got a union. He's a member of the part of my take, Recurrent Guest Association. That's true. And so by the CBA that we've enacted with him, we have to legally hear his request for appeal.

Right. So we'll see what happens going forward. But right now, it's just a two-man race. Old-fashioned Blake of the Year whenever we get to the Takies this year. It's two-man race. What do you think happens? I just realized it's going to be a lot harder for them

to pick ping-pong balls with just two of them. That's true. We're going to have to change that up this year. That was a joke. What about one of the worst things we've ever done? That will be on our worst of the year. Who do you think was the maddest? I think it was Blake Griffin.

Yeah. Got the most frustrated over the course of the ping-pong ball selection. Definitely. Yeah, when we run our worst of the year episode, that will definitely be highly featured. Yeah. Because that was.

Just run the whole thing. Yeah, we should. And just torture everyone again. We should actually run it. Did we edit it down, too? Yeah. You know what we should do? I don't know if you can do this, but Executive Hank,

you're tight with YouTube. Yes. Maybe what if we could buy ad space on our YouTube video? And the ads are just Blake of the Year ping-pong running. So when you get a break of it, it just goes to an ad. We actually could probably do that. OK, great. That would be great.

So it's just like, you can't escape it. Just make it so that people really don't want to watch our videos. Yeah, I mean, how much money would go to us if we sponsored our own podcast on YouTube? Oh. Probably like 80% for it. Can we double dip?

No, you guys would lose money. No, but we're paying ourselves. Yeah, but only like 20% of YouTube. Oh, but you only get a percentage of what you pay yourself. There would be commission that goes off to YouTube. You'd be spending 100% of your money to receive a percentage back. Look at this.

This guy fucking knows math. That's way better than our gambling records. This guy knows math. Yeah, but the 100% you have to understand when we pay YouTube. That is a business expense, though. That's a business expense and also a sunk cost. So then when we get the money back, grown costs, yeah.

It's a loss leader, right? Yeah. Do you do sunk costs up on the third floor? Where you're like, that money's gone. Yeah, oh yeah. Yeah. I don't know what that means. We don't have anybody around here like that.

That's how I basically just, there's a lot of sunk costs in my brain when I'm doing finances. Like, ah, I already spent that. How many more professional golfers do you think have to leave the PGA to go to the live tour to have somebody like, I don't know, Jake or Hank's level of golf being like, you know what? I think now I can make the PGA tour.

Yeah. It's going to, I mean, the good news is Max is going to make every cut. Yeah. There's no one left. The Max SLAM is really, we mentioned it in passing on last part of my take. But that's really a feat that I don't think we ever

thought would be possible. Yeah. He's done it. I also like. Did you see the saber metrics behind the SLAM? No. I'll pull it up. The real take, though, on this is like,

I wasn't surprised that Brooks is going out with his brothers on the tour. I also think like there hasn't been anyone who shocked me. Morikawa would have shocked me. Because let's be honest, Brooks has battled some knee injuries. He doesn't love playing regular PGA events all the time. He just paid Ludacris to play at his wedding. That's a pretty big business experience.

That's a sunk cost right there. That's a sunk cost. He shows up for the majors. Like all these guys that have gone, it kind of, I can see how it's happening. It's waiting for that one guy who might be like in his early 20s, who's got his entire career in front of him.

That guy going would be weird. Like a Colin Morikawa. Yeah, that would be the Colin Morikawa would have shocked me. Yes, but besides that, it's like there's so much money that's being thrown at these guys. It's very, very difficult for them to say no. Tough decisions. OK, so he's suspended.

There you go. Print it, put it out there, suspended from Blake of the Year. And then maybe in small, small print upon appeal. So he does have an appeal. And I don't think the appeal process is going to be that difficult, but we'll see. You know who they should get to play on that tour? Is Afi Barnrat, the guy from Thailand

that vapes all the time. He's like five foot eight, 240 pounds. And he just blows sick clouds on the course. He just burns all his money on Lambos. He's a guy, Lambos and Yeezy. He has an entire apartment that he got, a secret apartment dedicated to his shoes. That's the guy that if there's anybody that's

going to go on to the live tour, they should have his name circled big time. Agreed, agreed. What were you going to say, Hank? You got the max homeless numbers? Yes, so he tweeted this, he replied to this tweet, but it's from Kyle Porter, CBS, aggregate major scores of golfers who have made the cut at all three majors in 2022.

Sal Torres, obviously the top minus 13. Then Rory's minus 11. Fitzpatrick was minus seven. Moore Cowherd plus two. John Rom plus 11. And then Max Homa and three other guys are at the bottom of the list, plus 17 or higher. Wait, is that good?

No, I mean, he's just, he's at the bottom of the slam. Like of all the golfers that have done the slam, he's at the bottom of that list. He's still great, he's on the list. Is that like a guy that has exceptional babbitt in baseball, where it's like, yeah, he hits a lot of ground balls, but they all find the hole? Seamhead, yeah.

We just went temple, had to see him down. Yeah, we went seamhead on you, sorry. Very difficult, we do so many sports. Speaking of, we should talk about the Stanley Cup final. Yeah, what's that? We're puck boys. Yeah, we're puck boys. Yeah, we were big time puck boys.

That was quite the answer from the lightning. Weird series so far, because you just have blowout. You had an unbelievable game one and then two blowouts. Sick league. And now, yeah, sick league. And now, did you see the little like gamesmanship that was going on that now has cost potentially the lightning Kucharov?

So in game two, Saturday night, the abs were up six nothing, and they put out their number one power play unit, just to like run it up. Game three on Monday night, similar situation. It was six, two games in hand, five minutes left, the lightning put out their number one power play unit.

Kucharov gets hurt. I don't know what they're doing there, but it got chippy at the end, little fight. Yeah, there was a fight at the end of game two also, right? Like, I love that in the playoffs. When the teams getting their ass kicked and at the very end, they're like, well, we're still gonna try to fight you.

Try to get like a tiny bit of momentum to carry over to the next game. That's gonna be interesting. Also, the Avalanche goalie situation is gonna be interesting because like, it's weird to say because as good as the Avalanche have been all season, they still have like major questions.

Yeah, they have a goalie named Darcy. Yeah, they've got major, major questions in the net. So they might not even go with the guy that they've been starting. They might have to pull him because he looked shaky, as the boys say. Yes, and I also like, this is weird to say, but game four, it has game five, two, two type feels

because I feel like if the lightning win game four, they're gonna win the series. But then it's gonna go back to Colorado and they're gonna win six to one. Yeah, yeah, that's true. You forget about game five. But the lightning, the lightning are set up so perfectly where they've done this now a few times in these playoffs

where they start slowing the series. And so if they win game four, you're just gonna be like, well, here it goes, it's happening again. I do like your analogy though, that game three felt like a game four. Game four is gonna feel like a game five. It'll feel like a game, oh yeah, yeah.

So you said game four will feel like a game five. I think that game, the two nothing lead that the Avalanche had felt like a three to one lead. And so now it's three to two. So it should be game six, but it's actually gonna be game five, which is actually gonna be game four, got it. Exactly, and that's why you pay the big bucks

to listen to the puck boys. It makes sense when you think about it. Yes, break it all down. I need a graphic for that as well, Jake. It might've been like one of the stupidest things we've ever said on the show, but it does make sense to me. If you actually sit down and look at it, it makes perfect sense.

And then, other story, before we get to Hot Seat, Cool Throne, and then Rassilo and Mount Rushmore, the Warriors' parade was fantastic, mostly Clay Thompson, who had just a tour de force. He started the day losing his hat on his boat, driving to the parade, and then he wore a captain's hat for the rest of the day, which was very funny.

He truck-sticked a woman because he fell over, and he then almost lost his championship ring because he went to shake someone's hand, and it dropped, and it basically rolled into the crowd, and then he did Michael Jackson moves on the trophy in the middle of the street, and it was like, I just love whenever a team wins a title and the players get so drunk, you're like, wow.

I mean, Andrew Wiggins, that was the highest man on earth. That one picture, did you see his eyes? I didn't see that one. Oh my God, I'll show it to you. It was incredible to see his eyes, but I like when a team celebrates how we would celebrate if we ever won anything of any note, not when a team celebrates, and it's like,

oh yeah, everyone seems like they've had a few beers. Yeah, going back to Tom Brady at that Super Bowl parade that they had where he tossed the Lombardi Trophy and he was drunk and being carried out afterwards, that's awesome to see people that usually have their lives put together just completely fucked up. In fact, I'd like to see that in more walks of life, not just sports teams.

I want to see high-powered executives after they have a good quarter, like a good conference call, they go out, they get hammered at the bar, there are cameras all around them. We need to normalize getting blind drunk at a celebration for our heroes. Yes, exactly, exactly.

Andrew, we're gonna pull this up right now. I want your instant reaction, it's very, very funny. They should also make the losing team do a losers' parade. What are you gonna say, Hank? That'd be great. What are you gonna say, Hank? No, no, no. What is that look?

What are you gonna say? Don't give me that look. I mean, that's just little contradictory words. Put some money in the list, put some money in the jar, but what you just said is a little bit contradictory. What, getting drunk after you have a great quarter or something like that? You said getting drunk after celebrating your heroes.

Yeah, but that's different. All right, that's what I was saying. All right, $5 in the jar. I don't like this, Hank, you're becoming... I didn't know you were doing that on purpose, it was funny. I think that we should normalize people getting drunk after they have a brief glimmer of doing a good job at their work.

Yes. People, athletes who are in their mid to lower 20s, that's what I'm getting at. Agreed. I also think that I might have gotten photoshopped a little bit. Yeah, I didn't think it was that bad. Damn it.

And what? The eyes. Oh no. I mean, he's fucked up, but someone did photoshop them very red and then I laughed at that, so strike that from the record. You got fake news. Yeah, I mean, it was very funny.

Yeah, this is the one that I saw that was very funny. Really fucked up. I'm gonna believe that. Yeah, right, like that's, come on, let me believe it. I thought it was real too. Yeah, like what the fuck? Why would you do that? Let me believe that shit.

I actually think someone photoshopped his eyes to be less red to try to save Andrew Wiggins. That's the fake news. That is exactly what happened, folks. I don't like that they didn't have him get on the mic and speak, because I need somebody to say something stupid at these victory pranks too. Yeah, yeah.

Let them just get drunk, open up, open their hearts to everybody and let one guy on the team say something absolutely dumb as shit. Yes. And then let us laugh at that. Yeah, so I mean, Corey Crawford did it with the Black House when he just got on the mic and just like fucking right, Chicago, like that was, you know, like just swearing

and just being so blind drunk. You don't know what you're saying. I want that. I think a veg can said, I told you we are not going to be sucked this year. Yeah, that shit is that you need that and then you make shirts. That's how the world goes around.

Yeah, they're really taking money out of the local economy. Yes, yes. All right, let's do hot seat, cool throne, and then we'll get to Ursula and Mount Rushmore. Before we do that, Skrill. Skrill is the best digital wallet for gamblers because it was built for gamblers. Sophisticated gamblers use it to manage their bankroll

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so you can start using their digital wallet today that is Skrill. It is the best digital wallet for sports betters. It's a no-brainer to create your free account. Write this instant. Check out Skrill. Hot Sea Cool Throne, Hank. My hot sea are the Rockets.

They benched John Wall last year, even though he wanted to play and was ready to play because they wanted to develop players, aka get a lower draft pick. And then today he kind of got a little revenge. He exercised his option to resign and it's gonna get paid $47.4 million. Good for him.

Living in Texas. Good job. And they're obviously gonna try and trade him. No one's gonna want to trade for him and they're gonna have to buy him out. Yeah. So they're not gonna want to trade for him because of the salary,

but he's still a good player, right? He's totally healthy now. He has no lingering foot injuries. He's back. I feel like he's gonna be a great player as soon as he gets off the Rockets. Yeah, I agree. Agreed.

We all agree. He's gonna have all that money in his pocket. Which maybe not, you know, James Harden who knows. I don't think John Wall is James Harden. Yeah, James Harden is James Harden. James Harden, there's no other James Harden. He is one of one. James Harden, we should start that Twitter right now.

But James Harden was better than John Wall when he had his peak. Correct. Correct, yes. That's true. Unless it was a game seven. True. Yeah.

Or any game in the playoffs. Speaking of basketball, my cool throne is just unathletic bloggers competing in sports. We talked about Idol on Monday. Today, Big Cat had all of the contestants play basketball, like a weird form of basketball, and I was just watching the clips before we recorded,

and I don't think I've ever laughed as hard in my life. It's just ridiculous. Yeah, so Barstool Idol's still going on. Check out the Barstool Sports YouTube page for the 7 p.m. eliminations. And PFT's gonna be, yeah, this is gonna drop on Wednesday, so it'll be fine.

It won't be a spoiler. PFT's gonna be doing some stuff on Wednesday with all the contestants. So it's gonna be great. Do a lot of stuff. Yeah, yeah. Putting through the ringer. We're gonna find a new colleague.

But you just, obviously, it's like, you know, even watching unathletic people play golf, unathletic people play anything is funny, and this was just people that have never played basketball, I don't know, ever, slash, in the last 10 years. Well, it's also the rules that I've created for this game. It's full court, and if it's full court, you have to make a basket to be off the court,

and there cannot be two consecutive shots at the same basket. And it's nine people all on their own, which just, it creates one of the dumbest-looking basketball games you could possibly imagine. We'll post some of the videos. It's, I was in tears laughing with PFT. PFT can attest.

I was dying. There's everything I wanted and more. There's something very funny about somebody whose job it is to talk about basketball players, and you put a basketball in their hands, and they seriously look like they're a two-year-old that has never seen the sport before. That's why, shout out, John Rostine,

never touched a basketball. Smart. You can never be in that position. There's no upside to it. Literally never touched a basketball. I hit a half-port shot at Iowa. You did? Yeah.

But Jake, you're like a sneaky, no, you're a sneaky good at everything. Yeah. No, that's a fact. All right, PFT, your hot seat quilt's wrong. My hot seat is sex. Ooh. Sex on the hot seat.

Hank? That's, hear me out, Hank. Why? One of attraction from Daddy's south, by the way. Absolutely not. So, my hot seat is sex because the World Cup in Qatar, Qatar, that's one of those words that every time I say it, I get people telling me

I'm saying it wrong. Yep. Both times from now on. But at the World Cup this year, they've implemented a rule, I guess it's a law in the country, but they're holding the law in place for the World Cup. A one-night stand is against the law there.

What? And could be punished by up to seven years in Qatari prison. Now is a two-night stand allowed? I don't know if you develop, if you get married before, that's actually something that they should look into is having a drive-through marriage ceremony place

like in Vegas. Yeah. So if you want to bone somebody that you just met over there, then you get married real quick and you can have sex. We need it like a pop-up outside of the bars or like a pizza truck, it's just a marriage truck. In the hotels.

Yeah. Just as you go in the door like, hey, you want to get married? I noticed that you're with a lady right now. Yes. Get married and then a divorce place also on the way out. Right now as you walk out of the hotel.

Yeah, that's what they need because it's going to be a real issue over there. First of all, they're not really allowing drinking that much unless you're on one of the designated resort areas like inside a hotel. And then on top of that, there's no one night stands that you can have either. Feel like we probably should have done the World Cup there.

Probably not, but that's FIFA. They make the live tour seem like a salvation army. It is funny when we, you know, the live tour is obviously hot in the streets right now and they're like, oh yeah. Yeah, well, FIFA, we've got stadiums that were built by slaves. Yes.

And a lot of them perish. And if you have sex or drink, we will execute you. Yes. And oh yeah, we're doing an entire World Cup in the middle of the desert where we have to blast air conditioning and do the tournament in the middle of American football. It's really one of the worst

overall tournaments of all time. Ever. But I'm still very excited for it. Oh yeah, yeah, we're going to watch. I got Italy. I got Italy in six. There we go. My cool throne is balls.

Oh. Balls on the cool throne. All right, that's going on. Yep. Shut the fuck up, Hank. You know what? You should bonk yourself on this one because I'm talking about baseballs.

Oh. The balls in baseball are on the cool throne because Major League Baseball sent out a memo that all 32 teams will be required to get the balls ready using the exact same technique. Up until now, each clubhouse did a different way. Yeah, the humidifier and shit. So yeah, like called Colorado, they used to put them

in the humidifier, humid or whatever it was. Arizona as well. Different places do it different ways. But now there's a specific method that every single team has to use. The proper technique is painting the full surface of the ball with the mud using two fingertips and you use a very precise rubbing motion with the ball

in between both hands to get mud into the pores of the leather. And it's a 30 to 42nd process. It will be monitored now by Major League Baseball as opposed to just letting teams do it however they want to do it. That could also be a hot seat for the Yankees too. Yes.

Because the Yankees are probably definitely doing something different with their balls. Just win every game. First team of 50 wins since the 2001 Mariners in 67. No other teams won 50 games in a season? No, in this fastest team. Oh, got it. First, not first.

Fastest first. Yes. The fastest first team since 2001. So yeah, this is that. That Mariners team did not do well in playoffs. I feel like this is a good opportunity for us to make some mid-season bets. Yes.

On team total wins and losses. Like I feel like the good teams, I might just start fading every good team. Yeah. Because I'm always at the mindset that in baseball, if you're not cheating, you're not trying. That's fast. And so every single team is cheating

in a certain way. This seems like they're closing a pretty big cheating loophole. Yes. Yes, I agree. I have two hot seats. My first hot seat is Marilyn Monroe. There was an article that came out. This kind of fucked up because she's

been dead for a really long time. But it was basically that Marilyn Monroe was like an all-time smelly person. Yeah, that is fucked up. Yeah. So it's David Brett writes about Marilyn Monroe's non-hygienic personal habits that not many people knew about.

According to Brett, she was flatulent, dirty, and ate in bed. Like Jean Harlow, she bleached all her pubic hair and never wore panties. Also, this one is actually gross. Is that dirty to bleach your pubic hair and not wear panties? I don't know. But I guess she was a big-time farter.

She had what they didn't have a term for it back then. But she had IBS, irritable bowel syndrome. And she also, she rarely bathed, slept in the nude, and ate a lot in bed, shoving what was left on her plate under the sheets before going to sleep. I'm fine with all that. That's crazy. And I guess Joe DiMaggio complained all the time

about how much she stunk. I'm fine with all that. I'm always OK with a new article coming out being like, you know, Hitler had diarrhea since he was 13 years old. Yes. But don't do that to Marilyn Monroe. Yeah, it's kind of fucked. Let her rest in peace.

It's kind of fucked. And then my other hot seat is me. And I'm actually going to put the EWLs on the hot seat, because I'm stuck now in a spot where we want Kevin to run on this show. And he just has outflit me so hard at this point that I need people to start replying to his tweets just saying, go on, pardon my take.

I don't know what else we can do. I've been Instagram DMing him for five years, and he just he just he just doesn't reply. Or when he does reply, it's just mean. And but he also said that like I went back and I looked and he also agreed to come on. I'm just getting outflit. So I need help.

You know what the problem is? We haven't won anything on this podcast. Yeah. We keep losing that fucking I Heart Radio award to like whatever new podcast comes up that year and goes away. Maybe if we start getting some rings, then he'll be like, yeah, they're an elite team. I want to join up with them.

Yeah. And maybe I can help them win something. We need to be better bus drivers. Yes, we do. And then get him on our side to try to submit his legacy as an all time content creator. He would be so good on this show. I also when I was looking back, because like he

replied to one of my tweets yesterday. So I was like, oh, I'm going to strike up another conversation. Like saw my Instagram DMs and didn't reply. But I looked back. I don't know if you remember this thing, but you saw him at a concert once and you didn't go up and say hello. And I sent him a message.

I'm like, my producer saw you, but like pussied out and didn't say hello. And he just replied, he's a baby back bitch, which is hilarious. And then another time, I think I can't remember what was happening. He was getting like he was getting dragged. Oh, no, it's when he got hurt.

He got hurt in the series against the Raptors. When he tore his Achilles. And I said, sorry, bro, hope you're back soon. And he just wrote back, stop being a bitch. I ain't on my deathbed. So like, these are our conversations. I just I get out of it every rich way. Yeah, I don't know what to do.

I think I'm just stuck. We got to play hard. We got we should suspend him from the podcast. Yeah, make him want to come. Yeah, there was another one where there was some. I can't remember what was happening at the time. But like something he said, oh, it might have been something he was some controversy.

Maybe it was the burner shit. And I was like, you know, like we we deal with something similar. Like obviously you're way bigger, but we deal with something similar where people dissect like every mood we're in and everything. You know, like if we have one off day, they're like, all these people hate each other. And he just replied to me and he said, you cannot compare to me. So you can't relate to me. And I was like, OK, so it sounds like I'm stuck.

I'm completely out. It sounds like he actually hates you. Yeah. But then he'll reply like and like he one day he was just like happy Thanksgiving. He's a I don't know where he's we got it was Thanksgiving. Yes, he said happy turkey day, my man. And I was like, what the fuck?

I don't know what to do. We got to figure out a different way to approach this. It's like he that's the bottom line. I don't think he hates the way that we're doing it right now is not working out. I need everyone's help. I need everyone's help. I really do. And then my cool throne, this one's this one is going to be a shocker if you had this for things that we're going to get mentioned on part of my take. My cool throne is the Pittsburgh Pirates.

Whoa, because they called back up their young phenom shortstop who's six seven shortstop. His name is O'Neill Cruz. And I was watching last night. I was watching the highlights because they were playing the Cubs. They killed the Cubs. This guy might be the most electric player I've ever seen in my life. Six seven. He's six seven.

He's a shortstop. He he ran he he on a sack fly to like short left. He was safe at home. So he like beat out like basically like you'd never go. No one would ever go. He had the three fastest sprint speeds of the year by a pirate. Thirty one point five miles per hour. Thirty points. There's no chance he ran thirty one.

What is that? What is thirty one point five then? Thirty one. Three fastest sprint speeds of the year by a pirate. Thirty one point five feet per second. I don't know because it can't be thirty one point five. Yeah, that would be he would be elite. But what is that? The Raiders would have drawn. What is that? I don't know. I don't.

One point five. It sounds like this guy's going to be really good on the Yankees in four years. Don't do that to the Pirates fans. He had he hit a ball one hundred and twelve miles an hour last night. One hundred and thirteen miles an hour. And then here's the crazy one. He threw a ball from shortstop. It was the hardest throw by an infielder and MLB feet per second.

OK. Hardest throw. He's so fast. Hardest throw by an infielder in Major League Baseball this year. He threw a ball from shortstop to first. Ninety six point seven miles per hour. I saw that one. And that was it was impressive. Maybe the most impressive part about that throw was he didn't even reach

his arm back all the way. He's just got a whip attached to so he is absolutely electric. So I you know baseball is one of those sports. If your team sucks, but you have one of these guys. Yeah, everything can be OK. You're like, I'm going to watch and just hope he does something incredible. And he he got called up last year for two games. And I think he had a home run.

But he's he's going to be incredible. So I'm buying all my stock in O'Neill Cruz right now. I'm lashing out a little bit because that's that's the situation I'm in right now with Juan Soto. Yeah, but I'm always thinking like, oh, he's going to be a met or he's going to be a Yankee. Yeah, just wait. Yeah, his his first big league home run last year.

Oh, no, he ripped a single last year that was 118 miles an hour. That's pretty sad. He's just fucking everything he does is fast. That's a cool name to O'Neill Cruz is awesome. And he's six seven. Like you don't see a lot of six seven shortstop. Yeah. OK, Jake. My hot seat is Duke basketball because despite having an office,

despite giving quotes on players transferring, Coach K says he will not be attending any home games at Camarindo this season. Do we believe as a fan? I ever assumed so. But we don't know that because he's still giving quotes and well. So he he's only going as a coach. He's only going to go to the away games. Yeah, he's as a coach.

He'll be there. You would maybe think so. Oh, I don't know. Interesting. Interesting how he's retired. I don't know why his name keeps coming up right here. He keeps giving quotes and has an office. No, that might be it. That might be it.

See, like outbounding these quotes, he's calling up reporters and be like, hey, just so you know, I'm not going to be at the games next year. They're like, OK, he's probably getting like a special high speed telescope built from his office so he can watch the games in his in his cave live. Yeah, that's a fucking guy. And then my cool throne is the SEC. So the College World Series is happening. There are five teams left.

Auburn, Arkansas, Ole Miss, A&M and Oklahoma. And Oklahoma is going to be in the SEC. So they're pretty much guaranteed a championship. I love, love Arkansas baseball. I love. Yeah, they're awesome. And it's mostly just because they are dominating the Jell-O shot challenge. Oh, yeah. They've got like 20, 20 times as many Jell-O shots ordered at the bar as any other team fan base does.

And they've got that one dude in the stands that wears the over the top Oakley sunglasses, which are just such a fucking cool look. Yeah. So there's a bar in Omaha that has Jell-O shot challenge. I think every year they broke the record, all time record, but it was very funny at the beginning of the College World Series because shout out Notre Dame. They actually put up like a couple hundred. They were not terrible, but it was like Arkansas, a thousand or like

twelve hundred Ole Miss, like eleven hundred and goes down the list. And it was Stanford thirty seven. Yeah, of course. It's so perfect. Of course those nerds were just one guy, probably. Yeah. No, I love Arkansas. It's like an entire fan base built out of John Daly. Yes. Yes. Yeah. I mean, must is our guy. The must bus.

OK, good job, Jake. Let's get to Ryan Russell, Mount Rushmore. We're going to start with the Mount Rushmore, and then we'll talk a little NBA draft on the other side. Before we do that, you got a quick word before we get to Rosillo. I want to talk to you about Coors Light. You guys have heard us talk about Coors Light nonstop, because we drink it all the time.

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Coors Brewing Company, Golden Colorado. Now here is Ryan Recillo. OK, we now welcome on our very good friend, Ryan Recillo. We haven't talked to him since the NBA. Well, we actually had you on for Fyre Fest for Chris Paul. Have you gotten over that? We're going to do a Mount Rush where we're going to talk some NBA draft. But let's start with Chris Paul.

Have you gotten over it? And why haven't you shown anyone my gift to you? You know what? I meant to tweet that out, but I wanted the fathers to have their day. I didn't want to make it about our relationship. So I should tweet out the gift that Big Cat was very thoughtful sending me. And the thing is, I know the truth. This is like X-Files over here.

I know the truth. I've been over the Chris Paul thing. I'm good to go. I can't wait, Sons and Six next season. Yeah, I there was a moment where I was like, he he this is really hurting him because he knows that, like, it's over for Chris Paul. It's over. He's just a choker forever. We were right. You were wrong. We know, ball, you don't like that.

Just that's just a fact. Yeah, I actually think I'm going to come visit play in that pickup game and just take all the aggression on you because I've been watching some of those clips and I was like, I'm going to get hurt playing in that game. But yeah, because that's like the kind of aggression you can get away with. Like, if you and I just started tackling each other in the middle of the hallway, like, I don't know that would go over well for anybody involved. But yeah, I mean, it was dark that Sunday pod with Bill sucks so bad.

It was awful. And it was kind of like, hey, come on. And then it's like, well, what do you what kind of content do you want? You want me to like repent? You know, it didn't make a ton of sense to me. And I'm not repenting. Fuck everybody. And I'm not worried about it.

If they could just bring in another combo guard and maybe lighten the load on the guy. So it doesn't have to max out during the season. Maybe we get through COVID. I don't know. So yeah, there's a lot of stuff going on. I feel I feel great about Chris Paul. I'm not worried about it.

But, you know, look, here's here's the thing. Like somebody at the gym, the day asked me, like, what happens when you forget what set you're on or how many reps? I'm like, well, I just do what I originally thought I was supposed to do because if it means I'm just doing more, the punishment is the reward. Really? You know what I mean? The punishment is just more reps. So that's not really punishment.

That's a reward. And I try to live my life that way. So when I think about Chris Paul and how I felt after that, I go, this is actually a reward. This kind of pain. You can't sign up for this. You can't feel this just generically. You have to feel it organically.

And I've never been better. I'm going to fucking roller coaster that only goes up. Yeah. I mean, if you think about it in that way, you're not wrong. You just have. Oh, I know. Thanks, though. Well, I'm saying you're not wrong about Chris Paul. You're just not right yet. Exactly. It's kind of like the Wiggins thing that happened.

It's the reverse of that. Is where Wiggins wins the title. I've always said that Wiggins just needs to be in the right situation. He just needs to play and he'll be elite. Two of the best shooters of all time. I said that. I was right. Yeah. Yeah. No, I can't wait for the next first number one overall pick

who then gets maxed out, who's super disappointing for eight years. You just go, dude. Wiggins fourth option. Wiggins. 2022. Do you remember that? Last Chris Paul question. Will you celebrate when he eventually does win a big three championship?

Yeah. Yeah. I'll be there. I'm going to go. Yeah. OK, because that's going to happen. He'll win one there. Do you know how good he's going to be in that league? They're going to ask him to leave it.

Yeah. No, it's true. He's going to be incredible in that league. I think he's going to be an outstanding head coach one day. I think that's when you're going to be right about Chris Paul. I don't know about that. Yeah. I actually don't know. I don't know if he would have the patience for it.

That's why I always think the Rondo thing is so funny because people are like, oh, he's going to be an amazing coach. I'm like, I would never dispute like how smart everybody that I've ever talked to is like, he is so smart. He is so smart. Like, seems like he doesn't get along with a ton of people all the time. Like, that's also part of it, too. So I don't know if Paul will do that.

I mean, you're just kind of bearing Chris Paul now. It sounds like you don't really love him that much. No, it's kind of like patient. He doesn't get along with his teammates. No, no, that's not that's not what it is. It's the Phil Jackson Kobe lesson where finally Phil Jackson had to pull Kobe aside. He goes, you got to stop thinking that these guys have a level

that matches your level. Like, your your seven is their 10 and they don't understand that there's an 11. They don't understand it. So you can keep holding these guys to a standard that they're never ever going to meet because they're never like whatever your next level is. They don't even comprehend that that's possible. So you can be mad and hold them to the standard that they'll never reach or you can just fucking accept it and move on and just live a little bit easier.

And I don't think the best players I don't actually think the best players, especially guys that are intense, that demand everything of everybody else. I don't know if those guys are the best coaches. By the way, Chris Paul's already banked 300 million career. That's a win. He might buy a team. Yeah, that's true. Get that get that out there in the universe.

OK, let's do the Mount Rushmore and then we're going to talk draft. We're this is the first Mount Rushmore of the season. We thought it would be perfect to have you on. We actually we're going to do we're sitting around discussing what we're going to do. We're like, oh, we're still just bought a boat. Why don't we do Mount Rushmore of midlife crisis moves? And then we realized we had already done that with you four years ago. So we're going to do something different.

I like this one a lot. It's going to be the Mount Rushmore of things you'll never do. So it's just things that you in your head. You're like, yep, I'm never going to do that. That's not for me. And we have this year. We're we're we're spicing it up because I think we're in our sixth season of Mount Rushmore. Yeah.

Yeah, six season 16. It started. Yeah. So we're doing teams. So it started on your show. Yeah. No, we invented that. Rushmore, they didn't even have a monument to presidents before we started. Pardon my take. Yeah, that's a fact. So we're doing I like when people do them and they put a fifth guy on you. Well, that's magic. Yeah, magic.

Yeah. Yeah. Magic was and it was nice that he did that because it made me think like why are we magic magic. Magic also went on get up for a week and it forgot every single CBA rule. But anyway, that's magic. OK, so we're doing teams. So it's PFT and I versus Hank, Liam and Jake versus you. So it's team Mount Rushmore this year.

We're trying to do something a little different. We were going to have it. Oh, wow. Yeah, we were going to have a fantasy draft. We're going to have it be Jake and someone else who's not here right now. So we had to do a little on the fly. There's a three man team that we're going up. Somebody die. Yeah, somebody is not no longer with us.

Their work ethic did some guy that can't really bench that much. Yeah. Remain nameless. You mean he like rounds up to motivate himself or lie to the public and then talks about somehow using two and a half pound plates that nobody ever uses unless you're like doing Olympic stuff. Hypothetically, that's the guy. Yeah, that sounds familiar. OK, so do you want him actually honest question? Do you want Billy?

No, I don't. I'm not asking for a trade. I know the timeline of events. I know I read 30 percent of what he posted the other day because I do really like him, but he doesn't get it. I can already tell you don't get it. Like I was I was talking to. Well, it came up in conversation. Let's put it that way. Yeah.

And it would be like me being a sophomore at UVM and then spending my summers working on part of the interruption and then graduating and part of the interruption being like, do you want to be the guy? And then at twenty three being like, fuck, this is hard. And you're like, actually, actually, you are part of like the late like early 2000s when the show started, which is a couple of years after I graduated, like to then think.

Like, I don't know. I love the kid, but I don't I don't think he truly understands how amazing his opportunity is pivoted into had this important like number one sports podcast platform. It's it's unbelievable. But I don't know that you can be that young and fully appreciate it. And I don't think he does. That's my opinion. The funny thing is like Billy will listen to this

and he'll probably he'll buy in after hearing you say it. Yeah, because he respects it. I don't know. Your mass. I don't I don't know if he'll. I don't know that you can understand it until you're older. So I'm not even being critical of him. You know what I mean? It's like the whole point of getting older is that, you know,

we already were 23 right when you've only been 23. You know, that's why old people hate young people at work. You know, guys that are in their 20s that think that all the people that are 40 in the corner offices, you work in finance, they respect you. They can't stand you. Yeah, you know, most of them think your fucking ideas suck and and they're and they're mad that you don't stay hung over for three days. And then there's some hostess at some new Mexican place that likes you

and he's frustrated and has had sex in three months. I love a lot. A lot of those guys don't like you because they also realize like they already did it. They did it. They did it. Twenty three. They did it at 24. They would like to get a bunch of years. So I'm not even I'm not I'm certainly, you know, I love the kid, but I don't know that he truly understands the rocket ship that he got a ticket to

that almost nobody else did. And I think it's it's hard to process it unless you like he hasn't experienced anything else. He's making, I think, more money than I did right at right. His first year out of college. He's making more money than I made at thirty one in my second year at ESPN. Yeah, easily. I love your hyper specific example, too. You could have gone with you could have gone with like Mexican restaurant.

Yeah. But you said New Mexican. That's where you're the best. That's where you that's what you learn in your thirties to tack on those details. Yeah, because, you know, when it's a New Mexican hot spot, everybody's going. Yeah, got to try it. Have to try it. OK, so so let's do it. Let's hop into it. Ryan, I was a lot of stuff. Sorry. No, no, that's OK.

I really do think it's good if Billy hears it from someone else besides us, because God knows he's tuned us out. So I imagine me. OK, imagine me a couple years out of school. I'm making good money and I'm on pardon the interruption. And I'm telling Tony Kornheiser that he doesn't fully get it. Yes, thank you. All right, thank you. Yeah, it's like two thousand one.

And you're like, you know, Mike and Tony probably only have a couple years left. So yeah. So this is going to all be mine. All I got to do is maybe show up to work every other day. OK, Tony, I get that you're sort of an observational guy, but you ever thought of maybe tweaking your approach a bit? Maybe doing some tiktoks, Tony. Yes. OK, so why don't you start?

Why don't you you kick us off? Hank, would you would your team like to go second? Sure. Or would you like to go third? It's snake draft. Let's go second. OK, we will go third. PFT and I. Hank is super salty, Ryan. I don't know if you can pick up that from this whole. I mean, what do you what do you think about team now?

Rushmore is Ryan in general. I don't even know what we're doing. I know I'm barely on. So I'm not like what what does somebody win? What do I win? Or what is somebody who goes? I like we're still those rush more the most. What's the payoff?

Nothing seems a bit like my fantasy golf idea where I think that the entire tour. PGA could use this right now because it seems like they need a little juice, a little injection of something where at the beginning of every PGA season, then you also have a draft of four sums that are point totals, kind of like F1, which you guys used to watch where instead of two drivers for each team, you have four golfers that represent a team. And then there's also a team element to the standings that doesn't really impact any of the other stuff that's happening because not like in golf,

you're going to let somebody pass you. So that was something I always thought should happen. And now this sounds like a rant about golf, but I don't understand it. Hank, so I'm kind of with you. It could just be our Northeast ties and the fact I still haven't done that. That free cameo video for you. Oh, no, that's true. What happened?

I thought I still think Ryan's trolling me. I actually forgot about that. But yeah, can you explain? I told them twice. I didn't know. Like, all right. So this is where I got confused. I'm just a busy man, Ryan.

Like, I, he, you know, he's a great satirist. Like he's very, he's very tongue-in-cheek. What is he? Satirist. What is it? Yeah, I got it. When he was telling the story about doing cameos on the life episode, I took him seriously and then I thought he was being serious. But I, in hindsight, I was like, maybe he was just trolling.

But my brother is a fan of Ursula. So I texted him afterwards, like, would you mind doing a video for my brother because he just told the story about doing it. And he was like, sure. And then it just never happened. Oh, wow, Ryan. And then I, but I followed up and was like, hey, I owe you that video, my bad. And you were like, yeah, I actually don't think you're even serious.

And I was like, no, I'll do it and then do it again. Right. Why don't you just do it right now? No, because I feel like it has to be intimate and I have to do it for the guy. Then I started thinking it'd be really funny to get all the facts wrong and then send it to Hank. Like 50 years of marriage, man. Oh, this was wedding and you missed it. I think it was.

Was it originally for the wedding videos? No, no, no, no, no, no, I was after. That's bad. OK, OK, OK. All right. So it's because it's because Big Cat and I don't like cameo because they harass us so much. Yes. And then cameo DM me like the cameo site itself was like all my dad wants is a father's day from you on camp. And like, no, you don't just sign up and make the commission.

Yeah, wait. So when you told that story, though, were you joking or not? I'd say I haven't come through. I haven't come. I've let some people down on that front, but I'm going to do one for you. But just think about the buildup. This is going to be amazing because they're hard to get apparently. They're hard to get than I initially thought.

I like the idea of us starting our own cameo, but just guess that we have on the show. And then we can sell them for like five times the asking price if they're actually included in an episode apart. Yeah, it's like, hey, just here's like 10 names. If you can just shout them out real quick in the middle of the episode. Just give it to Chris Long does it. Chris Long does not get enough credit for immediately realizing

what cameo was good for, where he had Ligaret Blunt do a happy birthday to someone's iguana. And it was like way before anybody was doing the fake ones. Anyway, we just gave them enough pub for two guys that seem to resist all the time. All right, so teams, I don't get it. Should I just go first? Yeah, no, the teams are very easy to understand. We've been doing Mount Rushmore for five years.

We've all been separate. We thought we'd do something a little different. So we're just, it's the same thing. There's three teams. It used to be three people. It's three teams. There's PFT and I are going to have four picks. Hank and his crew are going to have four picks.

You're going to have four picks. Very simple. Yeah. All right. Okay. So the premise is things that you've kind of just come to grips with like, I'm probably never doing that. But the thing is, is you may throw one out and we're all go,

I'll just use an example here. If someone said, I'll probably never go to the moon. You don't know that. You don't know that. Space travel 15 years from now. You guys might be doing reads for that kind of show. Yeah. Yeah.

So. But it's just things you're never going to do. You just never, no matter what, you just, it's never going to happen. Go. If I don't get married, I'm probably not going to adopt anybody because I would just feel that was weird. Adopt a kid. Yeah.

Just as a guy. Like a solo. That was, we just jumped right in the deep end. What about, what if there's a kid that's playing like at your local high school? And he's really big and talented. And you're like, he's 16 and you're like, Hey, I want to adopt you so I can make some money off you afterwards. I would hope at that point I have enough money that I wouldn't be thinking

about the financial motivation, but I would just think it's going to be received poorly. If I showed up to an adoption agency, just being like, look, I sort of let life pass me by, you know, I'm doing pretty well. You know, got a good setup, got a boat, but like, do you have any 12 year olds? We could borrow first. Wait, wait, wait, wait. I don't.

Ryan, you realize that you went on a rant like 12 months ago, saying that you wanted to adopt Chris Paul. Yeah. But he's older and has his own money. So like he seems a little more independent. I just don't think anybody's going to sign off on it. They're going to be like, wait, what's this guy's deal? Like I was not saying like I wouldn't want to improve somebody's life.

But I just, I don't know. I don't know that I'll get to a point where I'm like, all right, I'm going to do this. Yeah. Because I don't think I don't think anybody would sign off on it. I guess my question on that end would be what, what would have been like hoops, what would have been in it for Chris? Had you adopted him?

What would you have brought to the table as a father figure? Unconditional love. Love it. That's true. I mean, we've seen it time and time again. Okay. Seriously. Was what, was that too heavy?

I just thought like adopting a child as a single guy. Yeah. Yeah. Probably not for you, not for everyone. I don't think anybody's doing it. Yeah. I don't think anybody's going to go like, yeah, great idea. Yeah.

No, that's, that's a great pick. All right. So Hank, your second pick or the, or the first pick, your second pick of the draft, married, if I get married to complicate, totally different thing, totally different thing. I just want to put that out there. This is not a, you never know, man, stuff gets turned into like, we're still also anti adoption.

Like that's what I said. Well, you are a big tax guy. I'm sure the right also be nice. All right. Our second pick. Wait, Ryan, are you fertile? I love you. Have you had your swimmers checked out?

Oh, well, hasn't been a huge priority. I've had a few people lie about it. Maybe that's why I don't have any kids. Okay. Yeah, that's true. No, no, you're younger and somebody older from the gym is a fitness instructor and you're like, yeah, man, what's up? And then all of a sudden she lies to you about having a kid come in just to

fuck with you for a while. So you're right. You're getting ready to pack up for senior year. Like, you know, there's some trauma maybe that I haven't worked through there. I'm like, well, hey, look, let me just finish up. You know, I got like 12 more credits to go. And then I'll come back. I'll get us a place like we'll have to rent maybe year round.

Like I probably were constructed like that a little bit, but then I'm gonna have to move to the mainland. If that's cool, that's worked out. And then it's like, oh, no, I'm not really pregnant. Wait, are we still taping this? All right. Hank, your first pick. Our first pick.

When I was Billy's age, I also had a rocky road with my employment ship a little bit. I always thought I was going to get fired. I kind of did once and I always had this in the back of my head. I'm 29 now. I've just accepted it's never happening. I'll never graduate college. Wow. Nongraduate in the building.

Yeah. Yeah. And actually what two, two half of your team is that? Yeah. Yeah. Liam, I think has like a year left. Like I think he could probably get it together if he really had to. I tried to do one online class and failed it miserably and was like, I'm

never going to try that again. So no, I will never graduate college as well. What about an honorary degree? I have like three and a half years that I have to do. No, but I feel like if you do become president one day, you will get an honorary degree from somebody. Yeah, I guess that's in the cards. But I don't know if that's really graduating.

Yeah. I apologize for not knowing the full scope of the story, but like how many semesters were you? I did two semesters at Southern New Hampshire, but in both semesters, I dropped a class. So I was taking like the minimum amount of classes. So like three credits, three credits. So I think I have six credits.

And then I did, I did a one year film program that was just focused on like video stuff. So not really college credit. Okay. And that's how I got into that. And then I started interning at Barstool. And he in the first like the film, it was like a one year program. Like, I don't think those would be college credits.

And the first day of Hank's job at Barstool, he had maybe fabricated a little bit on his resume and showed up. It was the day that we did the combine with Todd McShay. And Gazz was like, so you ready to do this shoot? And Hank was like, I don't know how like any of this stuff is going to work. And then we kidnapped Todd McShay for like four hours. And I remember Todd McShay turned, turned to us at the end. He was like, because we said, like, oh, we want to do like mini golf with SVP.

And he was like, if you guys ever thought you could run this operation with SVP, he would walk out of here 10 minutes in like this is a clown show. And we're like, yep, that's true. I was basically told to come like help edit it. And I showed up like, all right, what are we going to do? What are we doing with these cameras? Like, where are we doing stuff? And I was just like, ah, what shots you want?

Camera one, camera two. OK, all right. Yeah, no, I mean, but I used to Dave, I was like, you know, I had a rocky couple of years where I was like constantly on the ropes every day. I was like, I think I might get fired. Who knows what the fuck's going to happen? And I was always like, oh, just go back to school. Like, I'll be a 22 year old sophomore.

It'll be sick. Yeah. So probably not going to do that. Yeah, not going to do it. That's fine. So me and Big Cat took this a little bit differently because it's it's both of us agreeing that we had to throw out certain things on our list. Yeah, it's whatever the other person might have a chance at doing. Yeah, like we I said, like, that's not how we're doing it. You see, PFT and I collaborated.

It's a team because it's a team. And I was like, what should we put like dunking a basketball? And PFT was like, I might dunk a basketball someday. And then PFT threw out there getting drafted by a professional sports team. I was like, dude, you're a kicker, don't rule that out. So we definitely came up with four that we really combined are never going to do. So you want to start with our first one? I'll do second. Yeah, sure. Our first one is run a marathon.

Never going to run a marathon. Ever, ever. It's just never going to happen. I almost became the first person in history to run a half marathon. Never tell anyone about it. But then like three days in the training, my back kind of hurt. So I stopped training for it. What if it was someone's dying wish? No, no, not to do it. Never thought it was insane to do.

It's nuts. It's so boring in the first place. It's like it's so boring. Five hours to run this thing. What if you're on a tandem bicycle called walking? Yeah. And it's also like one of those things where I think in your 20s, you have that idea of like, yeah, maybe someday I'll run a marathon. And then you just kind of wake up and you're like, wait, ninety nine percent of us are like, no, we're never.

There's nothing you could do to get me to run a marathon. The only upside I can think of for running a marathon is that afterwards you get to eat whatever the fuck you want. And before and right before night before and then right after the marathon. You just here's my problem. If I ever did run a marathon, I guarantee you I would get fat as shit right after because I'd still have the mentality. Oh, I just I just ran 26 miles.

Yeah, I can do whatever. And over the course of the next month, I put on 50 pounds in your douchebag. If you're on a marathon, let's just be honest. You can just buy the sticker for free. Yeah, you could just work out like a normal person. Yeah, well, the marathon thing's interesting because I, too, find it so boring. The training is boring.

I ran long distance for one year in high school just because I was like, I'll do this and it just I was like to get better. I just have to run longer to get better at this distance. I just I'm with you, man. And the thing is, it sucks because you if you train, you have to tell everybody. Yeah, what's the longest distance you can run and still be a normal person? I think it's six miles. I don't know. I don't know the answer to that.

Yeah, but the training, you're right. You have to tell everyone. All right. Our second pick. I love the team thing because Hank and I could have just picked. I make a video, Frank's brother. That'll be something. All right. Second pick. There's another one where it's kind of similar to marathon.

It's just like there is one percent of the population that does this and the 99 percent of us that are normal people will never do it. It's own a snake. I will never own a snake. I like that one. People who own snakes. Good stuff. Fucking weirdos. Again, I will never, ever, ever in a million years own a snake. PFT agreed.

We that was a firm yes for us. Just like that. I can't possibly because like this is a thing where you have to like run through the scenarios in your head. Like, could my kid be like, I'm big into snakes? No, you're not. You're not. We're not having a snake in our house. Yeah, right.

Like there's nothing that would ever get me to own a snake. The only thing that is a possibility in the snake. And this was a much bigger likelihood like a week ago. If somebody who will not be named had a snake and then died and left us the snake in the will. No, I would just. Yeah, I'd kill the snake and put it in the casket. No question about it. I wouldn't even kill the snake.

I just put in the casket. Yeah, that'd be fun. It always ends up being a problem. We had a roommate, you know, in a house that we lived in, had a snake. It was fun, party favors, guys smoke pot. And then, you know, girls would walk around with it, which was kind of cool a little bit, but then it disappeared. And we found it dead in a VCR slot, you know, so.

Yeah, don't own a snake. All right. Team Hank is hard. It is, you know, hard as to take a dead snake out of a VCR. It's got to be. Can't be easy. Yeah. And there's also, yeah, there's a lot of people listening right now. Like, what were those three letters he said? VCR. All right.

Go ahead, Hank. I'm going to pass the baton to our darling. OK. So I had Marathon as my one one as well. So you guys got me good. Board. Good board. This next one, it could happen, but it would be. Oh, shucks, reverse drinks.

Win the lottery. Oh, like that would be a shame if I'm wrong about this. Or 50 50. Yeah. See, I am going to win the lottery at some point. Yeah, I don't understand why you'd even go with that one. Are you playing regularly? Why would you ever lose yourself? Why would you?

Because every time you think you're going to win, it's never going to happen. Yeah. Well, the odds aren't great, accurate, but I don't. There's nothing that you've done or will continue to do. I mean, I guess if you don't buy tickets, then you've sealed it. But that one seems, I don't know, that's more on you. It's it's dicey. And it's your luck not mine. I don't even blame Jake for that pick.

I blame Hank for that pick for not letting Jake put run a marathon one one. Yeah. Yeah. That's bad. Team Hank is in shambles. I love this. I love this. All right, we haven't voted yet. You aren't the voters. Yeah, no, no, but team Hank is in shambles. I could see it on him.

It's not team Hank. It's where it's just all the four of us. I gave memes of vote as well. I will win the lottery. I won the lottery being with you guys. Yeah. Yeah. And also a lot. Or you don't have to rush more lottery.

You can you can still say, like, I won the lottery if you get one of the secondary prizes. Yeah, you only win a couple million. Wait, isn't winning a scratch ticket kind of? Yeah, that's winning the lottery. Yeah, that money comes from the lottery. You get $20 scratch ticket, get $5 back. That's winning the lottery.

I actually have scratch tickets. I need to turn in that I never did. Like you have to mail them in. I just never did. OK, that's what they get out there. Three years. For what? I just remembered that. No, I just remembered, like, if you get over, like, $600,

you have to mail them in. And I just realized, like, three years ago during COVID, I did. You won $600? Yeah. Never claimed it. It's good for three years. I don't think so. I don't think so.

I don't think so. I don't know why I said that out loud. It just, like, hit me like a top risk. Yeah, that doesn't make any sense. Because whenever the lottery goes up, they don't say, like, hey, no one got the $10 million winner, but we'll give it three years for next week. Yeah.

No, you're screwed. All right, you got two picks, Ryan. Extreme feats of toughness. I just think none of this is tough. It's going to happen. Like, when I watch the big wave surfers, I go, that would be awesome. I got eaten up on a five footer, and it sucked.

I hated it. You're like, oh, am I going to drown? You know you're not going to drown. I can't possibly imagine what it's like when it's really big, because I'm not even that good. And I'll even say this. You're going to get better, though. That, like, you could get there.

Yeah, the big stuff. No way. Take a trip to Hawaii one day. No, lung exercises. Good conditions. Like, who the fuck am I kidding? Yeah. Yeah, I don't think that's going to happen.

And then I'm just going to throw in two others that I think are under that umbrella. So this is still just one pick. But, like, whenever I read, I was reading some story about this business transaction the other day, where this guy was sort of a bully, but he was bullying the wrong guy, and the guy closed the door on him very much, you know,

Bronx Tale style, and was like, look, you want to get into this, we'll close the door, and we're going to see who walks out. I love that idea. I don't think I'm ever going to have a chance in my life where I'm going to say that to somebody, because the other thing that would suck is what happens if you lose?

What if you say that, and then you get your ass kicked? But it is badass. It is badass. It's a badass thing to say, but, like, where am I going to be where I get to actually do that? And I don't know why I would even want to. I guess it's just that element of wanting to test yourself and see where you're at.

Because then I felt like I was getting really, really soft recently, not, you know, actual to the touch. But I just felt soft. And I started looking up, like, these extreme outdoor, like, test yourself-type things. And I was, like, looking at the itinerary of what it was. And I was like, I don't know. Fucking Anthony Edwards is so much fun to watch right now.

I'm like, I don't think I want to do any of these things. So I just, as I get a little bit older and shit hurts more and more, and I just don't think I'm all that tough, I just think any of the extreme acts of toughness, whether it's big wave surfing, MMA at an office, or just outdoor survivalist shit, none of it's happening. I can buy a Fire Starter Kit. I'm never fucking using it.

Yep. I like that pick, because there's, like, I'll see, like, videos on your Instagram of, like, Navy SEALs training. And it's, like, even just, you know that those guys have been training for two months. And just them crawling on a beach, I'm like, no, I'm out on that. Just that.

When I jump into the water when it's cold, I think about those guys in San Diego. Yep. And I go, oh, it's a little, it's a little chilly for you. Yeah, right. It's a little chilly for you jumping in. It's like, OK, how about get self-induced hypothermia rolling around in the sand in this water

with logs for the next two straight days? How about you do that and then talk about how you want to kind of dip in slowly to the ocean? So I just, I'm so annoyed with how soft, I think, deep down I really am, which I shouldn't admit. Yeah. Where do you stand on these adventure races? Ones where you go out and you just, like,

climb over a bunch of walls. It's, like, a three-mile course. Everybody always posts about those on social media. They're like, I've done one. I just accomplished the mud race. Yeah, they're so easy. Like, they're not hard. That's not extreme enough, right?

No, no. I want to, is there a chance I can die? And I don't, these obstacle courses with some mud and a rope, no. No. OK. Good pick. What's your next pick coming around?

Same Instagram deal. You'll see some picture. Like, that's amazing. And then I'll look on the map. I'm like, oh, the northern tip of Sri Lanka. That might be really interesting. And then I'll look at hotels and what-tru- I've got to start eliminating some of these places.

I'm never fucking going there. I'm never going. So stop being enamored by some awesome posts. There's some great places in the world. Antarctica just seems out for a million reasons. Throw the South Pole in there. I don't think Russia would be hot on Instagram right now. You know?

Be like, oh, Rasula went to Russia. Figures. So no, not doing that. I think there's parts of China I'm never going to see. So I've been to a bunch of places, but this whole idea of this grand adventure, and I actually finally live. Like, it's a little different when I was at Hartford

and I'd start daydreaming about visiting all these places. I think you need to start coming up with an elimination list of stop looking at places on Instagram where you're like, even this little village in Oslo. It's north of Oslo. I'm never going to fucking go there. Great picture, though. Looks like a nice little town.

Do you know what's funny? PFT and I had Antarctica on our list, and we kind of talked ourselves into maybe stumbling in there sometime. OK, how does that happen? I don't know. Walk me through it. We never know.

We never know. So I could find myself in Argentina someday. And I might totally reasonable. I might go out. Listen, I came very close to going to Argentina twice in the last five years. And that's good enough for me. That's why you can't put it on the list.

It could happen. Yeah, so basically we're in Argentina. I was basically broken hands. So many of my good friends went to Argentina and I could have gone with them. And I could see myself one night having a big steak dinner, drinking a little too much Argentinian wine. And then they're like, hey, we found this deal.

You just take a boat and it takes you to Antarctica for a day trip. And then you come back. And I could see myself getting talked into that and going on that trip. Now, it's not likely that it's going to happen. But it's not 100% not going to happen. Yeah, we didn't cross it off.

It's not 100%. See, I like that. I mean, look, in Argentina loves kickers. They do. They love short guys with shaggy hair that used to play soccer. The Duke of Cane. They love guys like that. I'm surprised you don't pod from there a couple months.

Listen, I just think that if I can find myself within one late night of getting drunk and making a bad decision of doing that thing, then that is kind of off my list. And Argentina is close enough to Antarctica where I might end up there one day. Yeah. Yeah, I think this is the whole exercise here.

Maybe a little more complicated than we thought, but there's just a lot of things. Like I was going to put seamstress. Without a reply. I'm probably never going to learn how to sew. And I know they pushed it on us back in my day when we were eighth grade. You're like, you're going to need to know this stuff.

You're like, probably not. Probably not. It also requires sex change for the seamstress part. Oh, the seam. Yeah. So what would that be? Seamster. Seamster.

Seaman. Yeah. Did you guys just make that up? It'll never be a seaman. How about this? I'm probably never going to know how to sew really well. Okay, that's fair. Yeah, yeah.

Yeah, that's a good one. It's an outdated skill. Maybe it's on the way back. Yeah. All right, Hank. Team Hank. Phantom Thread. This one is from Bubba,

but I think it's something that everyone here can relate to. It's get another show on ESPN. Oh, that's a good one. That's very relatable in this room. Yeah, actually, that's 100% never going to happen. Maybe everybody on this podcast. I'm including you in that. That's a great pick.

That's a great pick. Okay. Ryan, what would it take for you to go back to ESPN? Support. I would never say never do it. I mean, it's still, but it would have to be like, hey, we actually, you know, we know you're really good and we're psyched about it.

Yeah. I'll say never. That's it. Yeah, yeah. You can say never. Okay, PFT, you want to do our next one? You want me to? I'll go.

Our next one is Move to St. Louis. It's just never. We tried to figure out this one city in the United States that we would just have no reason to move to. I tried to do it today too. And granted, there's a lot that you're not going to, all right, so let me stop interrupting because I want to know how you got to there.

We were actually threw it out there and we're like, cause you know, we, we tossed around the live tour cause it's hot in the streets and we know that that's not a no for us forever. But then we were like combined it and we're like, what if the live tour was stationed, headquartered in St. Louis and they offered us $200 million each, would we move there?

And we're like, no, I don't, I don't think so. Like if. That's bullshit. No, I don't. 200 million. I mean, I know the pod does well, but give me a break. No, Ryan. In your thirties, you wouldn't move to St. Louis for 200

million a year. That's a lie. No, no. I just resigned for double that, Hank. I don't need the money anymore. If they said Indianapolis, I'd be like, I'm in, but St. Louis, no thanks. Yeah, name it any other city, Detroit.

Yeah. Yeah, I go to Detroit. Hartford. Yeah, why not? Yeah, sure. You go to Hartford before you go to St. Louis. Yes. Yeah, pizza.

You got a beach nearby. St. Louis has good food. Yeah, they've got the pizza, which is like, it's like a Ritz cracker with ketchup and shredded mozzarella cheese on it. Good sports town. No. So yeah, we'd never move to St. Louis.

Chris Long likes St. Louis. Well, he had to be in St. Louis. Jason Tatum's from St. Louis. Okay, and where's he living now? He is? Isn't Beale? Yeah. Do those guys know each other?

All right, last one for us. We're never gonna try heroin intentionally. Yep, I'm never gonna go to a dealer and be like, I feel like it's a smack day. Yeah, I had this one. Yeah, yeah. So, but we're not, unintentionally, we don't know. But intentionally, we're never gonna try heroin.

You always hear about the horror stories, the reefer badness stuff. We're like, oh, a drug dealer laced your cheap drugs with a much more expensive drug. And that freaks you out a little bit. But like, who knows? Like somebody sprinkles something on something else that we try to buy.

But intentionally. I'm surprised heroin isn't bigger in nursing homes where people are just like, fuck it. Oh dude, apparently, yeah. I've said, if I turn 100 years old, I wanna, actually now I'm talking myself out of the pic. If I know you're never doing that though. If I turn 100, I wouldn't mind going out on a big batch.

Yeah. But we're never gonna do it intentionally. There was, this sucks, but there was a regular who used to show up to one of the bars I worked at. And he was always a little off and he would like dress up. And he eventually just opened up to us that he was a recreational heroin user and that all the cliches, the stigmas are all bullshit.

He's like, as long as you haven't in check. Yeah, that's a recreation. That doesn't seem like the correct sentence, yeah. He stopped showing up. Yeah, yeah. So we're never doing it. Never. It's never gonna do it.

That's a good pic, right? Good, that's good. This is like a PSA for everybody too. That's on the fence. Not even once. Not even once. All right, team Hank, last pic. This is kind of similar to Ryan's Instagram

travel destinations thing, but I was always loved watching these videos when I was a kid and when I was younger, I was like, I'll definitely do this eventually. I don't know how, but I've kind of just accepted it's never gonna happen. It's the wingsuit diving. Like not parachuting, but the actual like jumping off

the cliffs and like riding with the cliffs. Yup. That, I mean, you have to do like a million jumps. You have to become like a pro jumper. Definitely gonna hit a rock. Yeah. I'm really hitting a rock. I've never even gone skydiving once.

I'll probably go skydiving at some point, maybe eventually, but I don't think, I don't think the wingsuit will ever happen. That's a good choice. I don't think they even let you wingsuit in a safe environment. Like nobody ever jumps off a cliff into a giant valley and then just pulls a parachute.

They always have to like follow a river and go in between trees and rocks and shit. There's just no upside to it. None. I gotta say though, some of the footage on the wingsuit adventures, I think it's a bit like the mountain bike on the trail with the fisheye lens on the camera

where everybody goes, oh my God, would you do this? Or like, what was the light? And then you go, yeah, a lot of that's the camera angle. So sometimes the wingsuit footage, look, I'm just telling you Hank, it might not be out of the realm of possibility because I think some of the wingsuit footage is shot from an angle that makes it look even more dangerous.

Like when they're in some ravine between two mountain ranges and they're just going through it, I think there's more space in there. So I wouldn't rule it out. Do you guys, I know the guidelines have changed on Instagram, but I think it used to be that like, there was a thing that said like,

do you wanna view this like someone died? Would you guys watch it? Cause, or is that just me? I would watch it. I've seen the crash videos. Yeah, I would watch it. Yeah, I watch those every time. It almost like.

I got to, I don't, when somebody sends me somebody fucking themselves up at the gym, I hate it. Oh, I love it. I hate it. I skip all of them. I don't like watching. And like rock climbing with the ropes, not without the ropes,

but like rock climbing when they like fall off and smash into the side. Oh, the back. You love that? Oh, I love it. Cause I don't think I'll, I'm never gonna be in that spot. That's another good one.

I wouldn't mind buying some rock climbing equipment. Doubt I'm going to do it. And I'm definitely not going to free solo. I'm just too big. Free soloing is insane. Like nobody retires gracefully from free solo. No. You just have to keep finding a more dangerous

rock to climb until you fall off. Yeah. They're like, it's like wrestlers and porn stars. They're just no old free soloers. I don't know. I think porn stars outlive a lot of the free soloers. Yeah, that might be true. Yeah.

See which, what's the most dangerous profession? All right. Your last pick. My last pick? Yeah. All right. I had a few, a few more options here.

I think joining Chris Long and Kilimanjaro's out. Yeah. I can't say. I want to do it. But yeah. Yeah. I probably shouldn't say it's out. He's asked us to do it numerous times.

I've said, yeah, that's amazing. And then I see some of the other guys that make it and I go, I think I'm good, but like everything fucking hurts all the time. And I can only imagine like waking up the second day going, you have to go. You can't not go. But God, this, this is a lot.

I think it's a lot harder than he leads on. But then sometimes I'll think about some of the people who make it. I go, I should be able to make it if that person makes it. But we've had this Kilimanjaro joke going on with Long for like five or six years. The water boys organization. Shout out.

Donate. I don't think I'm probably ever doing that. No, no, I. I mean, I keep saying I'm going to, but I'm not. Let's be honest. Hopefully he doesn't listen as part of the show. I think after you have a kid too, you can't do stuff like no recreationally.

I might die. You know, like there's a chance that I would die on Mount Kilimanjaro. Yeah, I don't think you would. I think it's just this could fall under some of the other ones we've already hit, but this one's so specific because of the personal relationship. I've hosted the water boys event twice.

And then you always end being like, it's like LeBron when he's at the dunk contest that one year and announced that he'd be in the next one that decided he didn't want to do it. I think I've done that twice. I'd be like, I know we'll be, you know what? And here's $1,000 and I'm going next year. And then you realize like how expensive are the tents?

Oh, it's nine days. Yeah, yeah. I think it's a trade deadline. Yeah, I can't do that. Yeah, if Kilimanjaro was like maybe a day and a half. Yeah, right. Exactly. I'd be in if it was like, you know, five, five hours of hiking and then maybe three hours of hiking.

I'm in, but yeah, way too long. All right. What did we miss anything else? Anyone else want to anything? I thought about throwing on never going to be a car guy, but I hope someday I will be, but that does seem like something either you have or you don't run for president.

It's probably, or get elected president. Get elected, run is, yeah. Run to anyone can run. Yeah. But getting elected president, I feel like there's too much bad tape of us out there. Like there's just an endless supply of opposition research on it.

Yeah. Uh, I think there's been a lot of evidence that some other people who've been elected aren't the sweetest. So, you know, a couple of bad takes here or there. Joe Biden, you're talking about Biden. Yeah. What did you think about the bike accident? Careful.

I think exercise is great for everybody. Yeah. There you go. I don't think I'm ever going to streak at a game. Good. Right. No one wants to see it. Why would I do it?

Like I don't. Were you ever thinking like, No. Did this grow from a 10% wait, what? Did it grow from 10% to 0%? No, but like, you know, when you're in your like 20s, you could, you know, if you're dumb enough and you get, you know, like all your buddies get talked into it,

you know, like, oh yeah, like one of us has to do it. Like I, that just would be a no forever. I also think streaking, it just gets tossed out there all the time for any idiot that's on the field. That's true. We need to bring the original definite, like unless you're naked, you're not a streaker. Right.

You're just a trespasser. Yeah. Yeah, but I do love, I feel like people have opened up. I don't know how it's happened, but like the whole thing in the beginning of like, hey, never show the people doing it. I feel like we're getting to see more of it. Maybe it's because people will start chaining themselves

to the baskets or trying to glue themselves to the court. But yeah, I think there's like a really weird, we've, we've, we've sort of pivoted into showing a little bit more of this stuff. So if that means more people doing stuff, I know it's, well, I don't know. I'm just entertained by it, which I know is maybe bad to admit.

The last thing I had was learn a new language. Not going to do it. No, I think I want to do that when you get a little bit older. Apparently it helps you with Alzheimer's. Okay. So I'm not going to do it still. So you enjoy Alzheimer's then dude. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. But I still, I think I would rather have Alzheimer's

and learn a new language. You really don't think you'll ever learn anything else? Not a new language. Like fluent in a new language would take so much. I don't want to go back to school. Hank, you already had that pick. He's not getting his college degree. Fuck no.

Like, could you imagine sitting down and trying to learn an entirely new language? What languages do you know? I could barely do English. What's your love language though? What about sign language? Sign language would be sick. That's so in right now, Dakota.

That's true. Yeah, I feel like sign language, if you have somebody that comes into your life, that's deaf, sign language is, it's on the table. Shit, you're right. Okay, that's a good point. That's why we didn't pick it. Yeah, that's a good point.

It was a good leave off. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're right. I had read the Bible cover to cover. Not going to. That's such a good pick. I'm never doing that. Not going to do that ever.

It is something that I'll have. Has anyone ever done it? Has anyone ever read it cover to cover? No one. They just memorized a couple of phrases. Not even the popes have done it. They're just like, okay. That's what I think.

We know the Ten Commandments, and that's about it. That's really all you need to know. Yeah, and by the way, like font size, like what plot holes if you go through the full thing too. True. Absolutely. True.

If you wrote that today, there'd be some producer would be like, ah, I just don't. Little unorganized. Yeah, the main characters are just not well-rounded enough. Could the bush explode? Instead of just kind of smolder for a while? Some C4 in that.

Michael Bay does the Bible. I would watch that movie. Yeah. The Bible, a Jerry Bruckheimer joint. Yeah. Oh, so wait a minute. So the man are all the strong characters? Yes.

Yeah, does the Bible pass the Bechtel test? Yeah. There's a lot of bad takes. It's a lot of takes. There should be a Twitter account, old takes exposed for the Bible. Yeah. Oh, big yikes, my guy.

It's all. Get it out. This didn't age well. Well, right. I mean, it was. That's the point. 2,000 years ago. OK, that was a good Mount Rushmore.

I feel good about that. I feel good about it. Was it? Yes. Yeah, I don't know. You're always doubting yourself. No, I'm always doubting the Mount Rushmores. Oh, OK.

Yeah. After giving the stuff I feel great about. Go ahead. The floor, I realized we will come to an agreement beforehand. Yeah, it's like a team thing. That's the whole point. PFT and I sat down 15 minutes, talked it through, took some things off, came to a consensus.

I feel very strong about our four. We're going to dominate this Mount Rushmore season. Yeah, it's a super team. All right, Hank, go do your meeting. All right. Ryan, let's do. I'll follow up about that video. Yeah, follow up.

We'll circle back about the video. Yeah, yeah, we'll get that. Per my email, can you reply with a video? It's a deliverable I need. We're going to get back to Ryan in a second. But before we do, he's brought to you by Shopify. Shopify, the all-in-one commerce platform to start, run, and grow your business.

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Go to Shopify.com slash take all lowercase for a free 14-day trial. Get full access to Shopify's entire suite of features. Grow your business. Grow your business with Shopify. Go to Shopify.com slash take right now. Now, here's more Ryan Rosillo. Ryan, let's do-

I hope this email finds you well. Let's do 15 minutes on the draft because you've crunched actually all the tape and you have real takes instead of us just throwing shit out there. Where do you wanna start? Is chat gonna be one? I know you love Paolo, which-

I do, I'm a Paolo guy, which I think puts me in the minority, but there's some really weird stuff happening rumor-wise with it, which I'll just share, but I don't know how definitive any of the stuff is. I still think it's kind of funny that those who are from the outside will have these moments where like,

oh, none of us saw that coming. Well, like, no shit. Like there's stuff that we're just not going to know. But yeah, I watched the top probably 45 guys. I used to watch the top 70 guys, even though it's 60 picks because I actually did the draft for five years. So I got sick of reading other people's

scouting reports and just memorizing them. So, you know, I have synergy and I can sit and watch everybody anywhere that's played anywhere in the world that's on the radar. So when I went back through it, I've changed my mind a million times. If you're a chat guy, I'm not gonna tell you you're wrong because we haven't really seen

what chat could potentially be. The ceiling thing is a real thing. And, you know, like if you summed up the way he played against Zaga for a year, I'd say he did everything right. Like he never did the wrong thing. He always did the right thing. They ran the fourth most amount of plays for Chet.

You know, there were three guys getting more touches ahead of him. He was a center on defense, he was a guard on offense and he played really well when he was off the ball too. He made good decisions, he can handle, he can shoot. It's incredible. He just looks different physically. And if I thought Chet was close with somebody else

where I said, you know what, evaluation right now and I'm still a little worried about Chet's body, the shoulders, the back, you know, the neck thing. You know, that might be a tiebreaker for me. So that's why I feel like Palo, I don't think there's any debate that Palo is the best player of the three of he, Jabari, and Chet right now.

But that's not what the job is. The job is to go star hunting. That's why certain teams will take absolutely like, close your eyes, swing as hard as you can type of picks over an established guy that might be a rotation guy. I mean, it's like the Yanis thing. When Milwaukee took Yanis in the middle of the first round, I talked to him after.

I was like, what did you see? And they went, you know what? He figured if he ever filled out and, and had like, he had a chance physically to be a dominant player. And not only did he fill out, he added like 50 pounds of muscle and, and, and got taller and everything else. And then the rest of it came and he had the person,

perfect personality and demeanor to work hard and have all the success that he's had. So if somebody said, I'm taking Chet because he projects like the best version of him projects to be better than Palo and Jabari, I'm not going to tell them that they're wrong. There's been moments where I really liked Jabari because it's six, 10 and his shooting over 40% from three.

And the fact that I still think he took a lot of bad shots because Auburn's guards were terrible. You know, I think it'll be even a better shooter in the NBA. And I think he steps right in and kind of knows what he's doing defensively at a really high level, which is incredible for a guy that's as, as young as him. And physically, I think he holds up immediately, but he doesn't really initiate a lot of his own offense.

It doesn't look like he's much of a ball handler. He wasn't really asked to do those things, but I never really saw it. Where I think a basketball today in the NBA, you kind of default to high pick and roll and can you do three things? Can you dribble off of it? Can you pass off of it?

Are you, are you someone that still has to be defended on his shot making? And Palakita get a little bit better on the shot making, get a little bit better on the rebounding. But I felt like Duke when they had moments where they absolutely needed him. And I would say like there's a four minute stretch towards the end of that Texas tech game,

not the last couple of minutes because Roach took over, but there was like a six to maybe four, two minutes stretch there for where Palo just took over as a six, 10 playmaker dribbling off a high ball screens. And to me, that's what the game is. And that's fucking insane that he has that in him now and those other two guys don't have it. So for me, I like Palo the most.

If he went third, I wouldn't tell the other two teams are stupid because it's now and it's a projection. And it seems like everybody's projecting the other two guys to be more complete. So there you go. If Chet doesn't fill out, is that really that significant of a knock on him? Because there's some skinny players in the NBA,

maybe nobody would like his shoulder size, but you don't have to be muscle bound. You don't have to be jacked up to be a great NBA player. No, but I mean, he's a year older than Jabari is and he's six months older. So Chet's the oldest of the three guys. When I look at his dad, his dad looks like he's filled out. I mean, obviously most dads do look bigger than us.

They're dads and then sometimes their dads are even bigger, right? The fuck? No, it's true. If you look at dads, dads are sometimes bigger than their sons. Okay. Workaholics joke.

I, but the thing is like, okay, he has to, he has to, like guys are going to fill out, right? Some people take a lot later than other people to fill out, right? But he gets his ass knocked around a decent amount at the size and he did it. Like I can look at Palo and go, okay, watch his first half against Gonzaga

when he had 18 points. Like you watch that first half and you go, wait, why are we debating this at all? Even Chet's doing some really good stuff in there. He's not doing, you know, he's not doing what Palo's doing. Palo's taking over games. And I still think Chet, like he,

you look at the conference that Gonzaga plays in and they win a million games and all that kind of stuff. It was just, it's not always the same thing. But then I'll talk to, I don't know, I was talking to an assistant GM the other day who was like, I was at this all-star practice thing where Chet was unbelievable. Like he was getting frozen out by the other players

and who's this guy? He hadn't played in college yet. Everybody's talking about him being the number one guy. He's like, he just went out there and blocked everybody's shot, like the entire showcase. So there's arguments, very, very strong arguments for all three guys. So, all right, big picture.

Where does this draft rank overall? And where does it, where does the draft, I love, I love whenever they're like, here's the cliff. Cause we know Jay and Ivy's obviously going to be, you know, probably the fourth pick. Where's the cliff in this draft? And there are multiple cliffs where you're like, all right, top four, those are all, you know,

possible all-stars. And then you're getting into rotation guys and then it falls off a cliff. Man, that's a tough one. Because it's, you know, every draft, like it's crazy how many top 10 picks recently, like two years after they're taking to the top 10, they're on another team.

Like it's an incredible trend that's going on right now. And sometimes it's because you were drafted fourth, you have value in a trade somewhere else. But it's like some of these drafts, you like see seven of the top 10 picks already gone to their second team after only just a couple of years, like over two and less than three years. So everyone's talked up the Ivy,

like does it end after those three guys? I think it ends after Ivy. I do think he's that good, but the St. Peter's game was so bad that there's still some stink on it from that one. But if you watch them to some of the under 19 international stuff that we saw with Chet last year, when they went up against the French kid,

it'll be the number one pick next year. Jayden was really spectacular. And there's just something to be said about a guy that moves unlike everybody else. Like they don't make a lot of people that move on a basketball court like Jayden and Ivy. And when he's cutting off the ball, he's just faster than everybody else.

He also looks bigger to me. But that second group, I would have Matherin ahead of Keegan Murray. That's not some huge stretch. Some people, most people I think do. I think the Dyson Daniels kid, the Australian, there's a bunch of Australian kids I actually like in this draft, but Dyson is this bigger guard,

kind of combo guard who does everything except really shoot it well at this point. And he already plays good defense. There's that second, some people would have Johnny Davis in it. Some people have Durin, the Memphis kid in there. Shading Sharp is an absolute mystery. The kid who was supposed to play at Kentucky.

And the only thing I have on him is the EYBL. And I'm telling you right now, it's crazy. If I had to write one sentence on his scouting report, I'd be like, he plays like already older James Harden. He dribbles and dribbles, and then he takes these absurd threes. And it looks like it sucks to play with, but it actually goes in.

Like it goes in a lot. And you're thinking, all right, well, six, six, if he can actually make these kinds of shots, you may have something even if I don't like watching it. I think that group kind of is a toss-up anywhere between five and 14, where I think there's a cutoff, depending on if you like Malachi, Branham,

more from Ohio State than say, Abaji, who's a senior at Kansas. I like Malachi more, but I get that people feel like Abaji's the finished product is the three and D guy, and he got to 40% from three this year. I know no one likes centers anymore, but I'd have to think Mark Williams has a decent role.

And then Sohan from Baylor, who, you know, I know you guys watch enough of it. He's just so different. Like he's not going to score really. He's not going to shoot, but he gets out there with his edge, his athleticism. He's, I think what, six, nine, and he just impacts basketball games.

I wouldn't call him Draymond Green because Draymond's passing and vision is really pretty special. And that's, I think, what makes Draymond Draymond. But there are some elements to his game where he really, really impacts the game, which you kind of like, when you're taking a guy with a lottery,

and you go, hey, he might get like six points a game. You think, okay, I'm really disappointed, but he's so unique in that. Hey, get him out there, let him switch. I think he even played some center for Baylor this year. Let him get out there and run and transition. And he's got some attitude. He's got some confidence and he's still a young guy.

So it feels like after Ivy, where I'd have those top four guys in the first tier, there's an order that feels like it's pretty normal based on what the mocks are. But I think around that 14, 15, you're starting to see another cutoff to whatever the third tier is. With Johnny Davis, I can break some news here.

If he's on the board at 10, the Wizards are taking him. How about that? That's pretty good. Can you also break the news on what the fuck that Taco Bell ad is about? Yeah, I was a little upset because they didn't do, they're like Johnny Davis, and they didn't say from the University of Wisconsin,

would have been nice to get a little bit there. Cause we're not usually in the lottery, would have been nice, would have been nice. Who's your last lottery guy, Devin? All right, Frank. Come on, come on, what the hell? Frank and Sam were the last badgers in the top in the first round, right?

Yeah, fuck, man. Why would you do that? I forgot Frank was in the lottery. But Frank was in the lottery. Yeah, it's a big lot. He was on the cover of Sports Illustrated, right? He's a national player of the year. I don't know if you remember that, Ryan.

I do, I was rooting for you guys. Yeah. I was rooting for you guys that year. Do you like Johnny Davis though? Here's what I love. I love the way he plays in that he's, you could see that he's a football player out there. I love his rebounding, man.

Like when, when the ball is up, that guy doesn't give a shit. He is going to go up there and he's going to end up with a ball more than you would think at his size. I don't love the shooting numbers, but he takes a lot of shots. There's no way anyone's going to ask him

to take those in the NBA because let's face it, that Wisconsin team wasn't that great. Correct. There's a reason why as soon as he was off the court, you were like, okay, where, where the buckets coming from. So it felt like there were a lot of bad shots, but I don't know if those are because of his own, you know, the way he sees the game,

or it was like, well, me taking a bad shot and contested step back, but two guys on me is still better than me getting it back to the guards and having them run whatever they want to run. So there's some mid-range stuff in him that are nice shots that he makes, but then there's also times where he gets caught

in traffic and he's just kind of going up and trying to go up against these other guys that gets contested. So I think the numbers can be a little misleading because I think he had to take a lot of bad shots, whether that was his own poor decision, also necessity of what that team was or wasn't. So I like that part of it.

I can talk myself into it, but then when I think about like, mathrin and having a little bit more size and being a little bit more dynamic and shooting the basketball better, like that's where, you know, again, I don't think this is, I don't know that anybody has Johnny Davis ahead of mathrin,

but that's why I have, I would always have Davis kind of behind some of these other dudes. Like during the Memphis kid is tough because there's times where I watched him where I felt like he wasn't making a huge impact. And other times where I felt like he was the most physically imposing player on the court

in games that he was there. But then you're like, okay, am I, am I drafting a backup five though, like in the top 10? And I think he's the youngest guy out of all of them. And I even, you know, there's moments where I really like AJ Griffin from Duke, but he's been hurt twice in high school. He got hurt in the first year at Duke.

The Duke group is a really weird group because there's a lot of guys that want the ball in their hands and they still found a way to be a successful basketball team with so many different people having to kind of make sure they shared enough while also getting their own. And for AJ, he was stuck in the corner a lot

where I would love to have seen him have more time with the basketball and making more decisions because I think he has some of that in. If AJ were healthier historically, you know, maybe he's the fifth or sixth guy in this. Although I guess defensively, you know, he didn't really wow anybody this year. Yeah, I mean, I like AJ Griffin.

Johnny Davis to me, I think he's gonna be a good pro. He had his injury against Nebraska. He came back from that obviously and played in the big 10 tournament and the NCAA tournament. He wasn't the same guy. Like his explosiveness wasn't there. And like you said, the team around him wasn't great

and he just was, he was swamped by people in the lane constantly. So I just think he's a smart kid who's gonna, he's gonna be good. He's gonna. I think he's got some juice to him too. Like there's, there's, there's a. Never smiles.

Never smiles. Now, you would have a hard time believing that like Johnny Davis would be overwhelmed by any of it. He might be from a size standpoint, just a little shorter than what you'd want. Ideally, but he's just watching the way that guy rebounds and thinks he has a chance at every loose ball. Dog.

He's got a dog in him. Yeah. He's got some dog. Who's got the most dog in them? Cause that's kind of the hot new thing. Like who's got that dog? If you were just drafting on dog alone. Dog alone will be Matheran.

Okay. Yeah. What about when he, what about when he kind of maybe touched that cheerleaders breast? I think the way that he handled it after the fact tells you he's ready for any kind of controversy. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. True. What about which Australian has the most dog in them? Oh. Dingo. Dingo. Wait, who's got the most Dingo in them? Yeah.

Yeah. That's a good, good call. Australians do love canines. Historically. Everybody knows that. Historically. I mean, the way you described that one kid from Australia, he sounded like you're getting close to Ben's semi-territory.

You're like, he's big. He can defend really well. Yeah. He's not great shooter, doesn't enjoy the rim. Well, I don't know if he's a frotter yet. So, you know, like we'll hold off until we have the fraud confirmation. But like who's the Australian that?

Oh, cool. I like who's Panjang. Okay. Well, I don't know if you will. I think you're more of a Hugo Besong guy who'll be his second rounder. Hugo, New Zealand breakers. I was watching a lot of Matt Walsh stuff yesterday and today.

New Zealand has this kid named Usman Jang, who's actually French, who somebody down there had told me about a year ahead of time. And it's like, okay, all right, you know, like, when I get to it, when I'll get to it, he's 6'10". And I think he, yeah, just turned 19 in May. I heard he has a promise at the back end of the lottery. I don't think he's going to be there

because he is legitimately 6'10". The shooting numbers aren't very good. The points per possession stuff, there's a lot of metric stuff in there that aren't, that's just not that good. But he's, he's already so good. Like, he's not running the offense. He gets stuck in the corner a little bit.

He had this kind of weird thing where he sat out, I don't know if it was because he got hurt or something in the middle of the season. So he has like these two distinct parts of his first season where he was a much better player in the second half of the season. He has this game against, I think it's the Southeast Melbourne Phoenix, where he doesn't miss a shot

for like almost the entire start of the game. And I don't know that he gets enough respect for like, it's okay, it's his size and he needs to get better at shooting and all this other stuff. But when he gets blitzed on the pick and roll, right? When he, he's, he's pick and roll ball handler. And then, you know, a lot of defenses will just set the thing

to be like, let's just have two on the ball, screw them up, delay them the whole thing. Because he's so big and he has the, the mind that works it. He's just like, oh, cool, two guys are with me. Let me just throw it over the top of you and then start kind of a four and three advantage behind you. And he kept doing it and getting it right over and over and over again.

And he could also handle at that size. Cause I think he's one of those late growth spurt dudes and he gets really low on the dribble. Now, if you say, oh, he gets to the pros and nobody lets him handle the basketball, which would be awful because I think it's one of the parts of his game I like. It's just, it's hard to watch this kid at six, 10, this young

and make some of the shots he makes, make some of the passes he makes and still have to handle and do some of the things on help defense and just kind of move where you're not like, wait, why isn't this guy a bigger deal? Because the first time I watched him, I think he was ranked in the 20s. And now I don't think he'll be there

for where he's promised in the lottery. Okay, I like that. All right, give me, I have one last question about the lottery or sorry, the draft on Thursday night. Use, it's the rowback question. Use code TAKE for 20% off your first purchase. R-H-O-B-A-C-K dot com. Q-Zips, hoodies, everything, rowback.com.

Best clothes out there. Take for 20% off your first purchase. Give us the one person that you would put your reputation on. And now you don't have much of a reputation left because of the Chris Paul thing that we talked about. But if you did, yeah, if you did have a reputation, what would you stake it on in terms of like, this guy is gonna be everything.

Like, do you remember the shit he was doing in that game? Yeah. And then Manic Faldum was kind of a bullshit play by him, knocked the shit out of him. I just think that Sohan's got some way that he's wired that he's gonna impact games in a very unique, I think he's the kind of guy, if it goes right, that every team's like, shit, we need somebody like that.

But it's also very risky for me to say like, hey, I'm putting my reputation on this dude because it's not like he has, if you had to describe him to somebody who's never watched him before, you'd be like, wait, what's the deal? Like, I didn't really score a ton. I didn't really shoot it all that great.

Like, God, I fucking love him. And he's got cool hair. When he dyes the hair. No, I've noticed that. A lot of different hairstyles there. Yeah. Is that a plus or is that a red flag? If he's good, it's a huge plus.

If he stinks, he'd be like, this guy's worried about his hair, fucking shit on own. It is so funny whenever like, like Marcus Smart would dye his hair green. And if he had a bad game, it's like, what are you doing, dude? It really, it's something to point to. It's like fat relievers. Yeah.

Yeah, if you're gonna be bad, be quiet, right? I mean, that's kind of the way it works. If you're loud and bad, it's way worse than when you just shut up and lose. Yeah. So who's the guy that you think- Shut up and lose a good t-shirt? Yeah, I like that.

It might be a good book. Shut up and lose. What about, who's gonna be the biggest bust of this draft? Oh, I like it. Tell me who a bust is. Yeah. And I want this clip to be played on like TNT after games when they interview a player that just went off

for like 29 points. And he's like, that interview with Brian Rosillo where he told me I was gonna stink, that took me to the next level. Yeah. Yeah, no, that's good. I always like when I can help somebody reach their ceiling. By doubting him before the draft.

Cause I mean, I think about it and we're like, people hate draft stuff the most. Cause I think everyone wants to believe that everybody else that does it for a living is terrible. And then they're like, I watch a lot of games. I know who's good and bad. And then that's the guy that's never lost a bet in his life. And he's always telling you that he's always right

and all the draft experts are idiots. The draft thing is always like this really weird dynamic where people get really, really mad at draft people, maybe more so than just other analysts in general. But then whenever I try to explain it to like my buddies they'll be like, oh, Mel Kuiper, McShay, your boy, they're the worst. Like they're so bad at it.

I'm like, what? You're pointing out the times they made mistakes. I was like, half of us get divorced and then we have way more tape. Yeah, it's true. You know? Yeah, so it's true. Way more tape.

So I'm gonna take a Trevor Kiehl's. No, no, that's too late. He's too late in the draft and I'm not sure. I mean, I would say you kind of put it in and out of it. Who's the bust? I don't, give us a bust. Give us an 18 year old that you wanted to just shit off. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Right before the biggest moment of his life. Broad bus. Yeah, this guy sucks. Jaden Harvey, Jaden Hardy could get a little bit better as far as his decision making. It's pretty funny, but he might not even be enough on the radar, you know, a G-League guy, his stock has gone down from where it was

at the beginning of the year. The Shade and Sharp thing I'll tell you right now, even though people are very enamored with the shooting ability, 6x6 and all that kind of stuff, to this point, it hasn't made a ton of sense to me. And when I watched the EYBL stuff, which again is limited compared to getting to watch him in college, which we didn't get the chance to see,

even his answers to stuff sometimes, I'd be like, where is this guy's head at? Even though I get it, he's really, really young, but the stuff that I even saw that I had access to, I didn't really like, but I've made that mistake before. Like when I watched Lamello stuff in Australia, I didn't really like it. And then he turned out to be an incredibly skilled player

who was just better when he was around other better players and shot it even better than he was. It was almost like he was so bored and disrespectful of Australia that it was like, it was hard to watch him in those games and go, okay, this guy's gonna be an awesome rookie of the year candidate. So yeah, the sharp part of it is a little weird for me.

Okay, he's Canadian though, like Wiggins. Another home run of a draft pick. They're on the rise. Yeah, team Canada, man, look out. All I want out of this draft is for the Nuggets to take Nikola Jovic. That's all I want. He's good.

Yeah. It would be great if we got everyone confused with that. I want to just get, I can't wait to see what happens with Gabrielle Pochita. He's one of my favorites, Lake Homo, a place that I have screen grabbed on Instagram that I would not take on the Mount Rushmore things I'll never do.

Cause I could see that happening fairly soon. But this kid is awesome, man. Six, seven fucking dunks in on people, tries to throw it around his back. The older guys on his team get super mad at him cause he's 18, he's way better than everybody else. And they'll yell at him. It's like dads yelling at you about,

don't go around your back. And it's like, how about you catch it? Instead of getting mad at me about it. And then he like steals it, he hits threes. He actually is already selling the three point contact a little bit too much, which is just, I wish American refs understood what they're doing to the game globally.

Cause there's some kid growing up in Yugoslavia right now, just bailing on a three point shooter, trying to get contact. And it's because the adults are messing it up, but that's a different podcast. Yeah, we can do that. Steph Ruin basketball, yeah, he did. All right, well, Ryan, thank you as always.

I'm excited for the draft. I thought we had a great rush more. And I love the shirt. We love the shirt. Talk to me about the shirt and says, I heart at Real Skip Bayless. You and I, we share a great deal of affinity for both Skip and Steven A.

No, we don't. We don't share that. I don't like Skip. Everybody knows that. Your shirt says you love him. Shirt does. You don't like him. You love him.

No, I'm gonna send this to you because it's cutting off the circulation of my arms. It's so small. But the thing is, is that ESPN, you guys don't understand, there would be all this leftover promotional stuff and they would throw it in this radio conference room that no one ever used in the radio department.

And so just scavengers, excuse me, vultures, just being like, man, picking this up. Like all these, like, I did not give you the mic and mic all start a weekend. Since then it was an old, it was an old timey baseball shirt. It was, it's small on me. I can only imagine what it looked like on you.

So I used to grab those, especially towards the end when I was kind of over at all, but still gave you a effort for work. I want that on the record. But I would, I would start like wearing the leftover giveaway shirts on the air during the simulcast. So I would have like, you know,

Mike and Mike the weekend shirt and I would wear it. I'd be like Mike and Mike the mess when they went to Disney and like threw stuff at each other on an amusement park. And that was like a whole thing. You're saying that with like a, you're acting like it wasn't an iconic moment in radio history.

No, the reason why the Mike and Mike the mess is funny, and I'm not like good for them, you know, they were very good at like the Disney part of it. But then one of the radio managers, I remember came in and like Scott and I were getting ready for the show and he was like, did you see the Mike and Mike the mess? Did you see that?

They went down to Disney and they did the, the obstacle course and they made a big mess. They made a big mess. They call them Mike and Mike the mess. You remember it? Did you see that? And Van Peltz like, yeah. He goes, we need something.

We need your mess equivalent. We need something like that. And you guys think I'm tough. Scott was like, yeah, I'm not doing that. And the guy would be like, you know, it sucked for the manager because the manager was like, let me, let me kick it around with the boys 15 minutes before they go live here.

But you guys have a, give me, give me, we need a little brainstorm session. We need you guys to come up with some sort of equivalent of Mike and Mike the mess for the SVP show. And Scott was like, yeah, I'm not doing, I'm not flying to Disney and throwing fucking like Boston cream pies at Rosillo and then calling it a show. Like I'm not doing that.

I would have watched that. Right. And then the guy would be like, okay, good talk. You guys have a good show today. And then we wouldn't hear from anybody in a couple of months. So I know that's why I always think that shirt was hilarious. And then I would kind of give them out to you guys, but I've been hanging onto this. I love Skip Bayless one forever.

So we got to get please, please send it. I will, I will absolutely love it. I'll send it to you. I'll send it to you. I was going to wear on cowherd show one more time. And then maybe I'll let it go. Love it. Love it. All right. Well, Ryan, thank you as always.

You're our favorite. We appreciate it. And please do share the Father's Day gift I gave to you because it cost me 300 bucks. So it's not cheap, man. Nope. And yeah, we'll talk about it. I'll post it today.

I'll actually post it today. We'll post it as soon as this pod is up. I'll then post it and the whole deal and whatever. So thank you so much for you guys having me on. You know, I do really appreciate it. So we'll talk soon, right? All right. Thanks to you, Ryan. Ryan Rosillo is brought to you by Mugsy Jeans.

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Hey boys, my fiance and I were having very normal sex sex last night when all of a sudden he stops mid-doggy and stands there and stuns silence. When I asked him what was wrong, he just had to look on the nightstand. On the nightstand, there was what appeared to be our bottle of lube that we had been using.

Upon further inspection, I realized that we'd in fact been using a bottle of hand sanitizer that looked exactly like our lube bottle. Everything felt normal and I watched myself thoroughly afterwards, but I need to know, am I going to be okay? I think you'll be all right, but I don't know. Well, your vagina definitely does have coronavirus.

It might be the vaccine to coronavirus. Remember that article in Pete Corona when it was like, bleach your asshole and you'll never get coronavirus? Sun your asshole. Sun your asshole. Yeah, but you have sun your asshole. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Sit and sun your asshole. So that might be what's happening here. You just solved coronavirus. Yeah, or you also may have just stumbled upon maybe the best form of birth control of all time. Like, I'm not a doctor. I'm not an option, but I do know. You're never having kids.

I do know that people always say like, oh, if you douche with Coca-Cola afterwards, that's like an old wives' tale from way back in the day. You're not going to get pregnant. I'm like 99.9% sure that maybe Antonio Cremardi could do this, but most people's sperm cannot fight through hand sanitizer. Nick Cannon.

Yeah. Nick Cannon's just very open about like- Future. How many, Nick, didn't Nick Cannon have four kids like on the way? He has like something like six kids within like two years of each other. Yeah, right.

None of them have the same- That's kind of cool. Like they can all play on the same team, little league team. That would be kind of cool. I think- You could probably do like five on five basketball. Yeah.

There was definitely a moment when I think three women were pregnant at the same time with Nick Cannon. But like they can all just be friends. Yeah. Hi. How do you make that mistake though? Like- No, I think he's very open about being like-

No, no, no, no, not him. The guy with the hand sanitizer. I'd be concerned that your fiance is an idiot because I don't know any lube that looks like hand sanitizer. Yeah, they send pictures. It doesn't really even look that similar. So like you don't make the mistake of having a lube or a hand sanitizer

that has the push down handle on it. Also, you're kind of an idiot for just like, why wouldn't you just keep going if it doesn't, like wouldn't you feel it before you- Yeah, it would sting. But it sounds like that didn't happen. They just were like, oh my God, look at the hand sanitizer. Also, it sounds like this guy's a beta

that doesn't make his girl wet enough. I'm just kidding, we're a pro lube podcast. Yeah. Or not, if you don't want to. For the last six months, every time my boyfriend and I are getting ready to have sex and start taking each other's clothes off, he constantly sings the meme song.

Oh no, oh no, oh no, no, no, no, no. Like over and over and over again. When he's about to put it in me, he starts singing it again right before. It's getting awful and making me hate him. The only way I can think of to get him to stop is if I tell him I just won't have sex with him anymore, if he continues, any other advice you guys have

that could help. Starts singing all the small things before he puts it in. Right back at him or get him hooked on the, maybe he just becomes like a meme guy and it's just, what's the one, if your money don't jiggle jiggle, it rolls, that one. Just gotta- Got nailed it. That one, is that what it is?

But that one's not as like, you gotta sing it. You can just go, oh no. Oh no, that's very funny. Oh no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, I kind of like that. I think you, I think maybe get a better sense of humor. I don't know what he's going for on that. Shit's about to go down.

In his brain? Maybe he just, he premature ejaculates all the time. It's about to be really bad. Now that would be funny. If he's- If he's self-deprecating. 30 seconds in, he's like, oh no. Oh no, no, no.

Hey, big cat, PFT, Haughty Hank, Jake, Liam, Memes. I'm in a friend group with five guys and me and two other girls. It's always fun together whenever we get back from college, but over winter break, three of them told me that they have had feelings for me for various amounts of time. Three?

Now that we've all been home for the summer for a while, I haven't seen any of them, and I still wanna be friends with them and hang out with them, how can I get them to hang out with me? Or should I just move on? Yeah, well, I need to know the breakdown. Is it three of the guys that told you that,

or was it two of the guys and one of the girls that told you that? Ooh. That would be an interesting plot twist. Three of them. That's tough for three, because that means they probably all have told each, maybe not told each other,

but like there's tension there. Either that or they were playing a prank on you. And like the last night, they're like, you wanna have some fun? Let's all tell her that we love her. Maybe you just say that you're gonna fuck all of them and then just see all their dicks and then tell each other like who's got the smallest one

and that would shut it down pretty quick. Like, oh, you guys all have small dicks. I think you gotta say like, I feel the same way about all three of you. Let's the four of us pull a reverse DK, go into the bedroom and all go out at the same time. Yes, see how much they love you. Yeah, make me air tight.

Yes. Oh my God, VFTO. It's just an idea. We're spitballing here, right? We are, we are. Let's be real. That's the only way that this turns out well is if you fuck all three of them.

Yeah, at the same time. Yeah. So there you go. You just have to, because that way you would probably break up the entire friend group and it wouldn't just be you bouncing out of it. Go get airtight, baby. College.

All right, last one. I don't know how we're gonna follow that one up. This is kind of Jake related. My boyfriend and I have been dating for some time now and we've been trying to spice things up, but this past week insisted, no, wait, I can't read. But this past week during a sexy time sesh, he insisted on tonguing down my chili ring.

While I'm not opposed to him eating my ass, I just can't get past how he worded it. I don't like the thought of my butt being called the chili ring. Is this a reasonable turn off or should I just let him have his fun? Cake Marsh, what do you say? He literally said spice things up.

I think it needs to be called the way that Biz calls it. Chili ring doesn't sound enticing. Is that chili? No, I love chili. No, I love chili fritos, those are good. Like the Cheerios, leather Cheerios is like, yeah, Cheerios seems like a harmless kind of food. Yeah, good for your heart.

But chili couldn't mess up your stomach. Yeah. So I think you gotta change the word. But it's already on the flip side. Okay, so the problem is with the word chili, it implies that it's not clean. Correct. You need to have something that implies clean.

I like leather Cheerio. Yeah, leather Cheerio, that's Biz. I like just hoop, that's what Biz says. Listen, leather Cheerio sounds good. Cornhole. Cornhole, man, cornhole's a little tough. Yeah. I like leather Cheerio though.

Yeah. Yeah, that's clean. That's classy. Yeah, exactly. But like, you know what I mean? Like chili is just like, we love chili, but it's like. We do, sounds like you don't. Leather Cheerio would not, not.

Jake, when was the last time you had chili? Knowing your bowels. Oh, I wanna say the winter. Mm-hmm. That is chili season. Yeah, chili season. Probably January or February. Is when you last had chili hole?

Yeah. Oh, nice. Leather Cheerio would be an awesome horse name. Yeah. Like, could you imagine Leather Cheerio winning the Kentucky Derp? And no one would know the real meaning. Yeah, I mean most people would know the real meaning,

but there would be a lot of people who wouldn't. It would be very funny. I only understood leather Cheerio via context clue because it was Biz nasty saying it. And so if you don't understand a word that Paul Bisonette says, Chance is already talking about a butthole. That's true.

But if somebody were to just be like Leather Cheerio, I would just picture a Leather Cheerio. That's it? I think you could name a horse that's certain. Yeah, so that's, if we ever get a horse, we're naming it Leather Cheerio. If anyone else names it Leather Cheerio, you owe us money. If we see Leather Cheerio winning a race, you owe us money.

That's a fact. Okay, great show. Matthew Fitzpatrick on Friday, great interview. We're gonna have a Mount Rushmore with Joey and Pat as well. And then next week we will have the Verstappen and Sergio Perez interview because we didn't wanna, they deserve their own show. They were very, very good.

Let's do numbers. 69. Six. What's the numbers that I can pick from? Six. Liam took 26, 27, 29, 51, 78 every time. Oh, someone said the 51's coming. So I'm gonna trust that guy whoever tweeted it.

15. 51's coming. 25. Ooh, 15 for Hank Tebow. 83. Traymonte Green, that's fine. 83. It's Welker, right?

Yeah. Well, same guy. Yeah. All right. Anyone got an animal fact? My animal fact is that like saltwater crocodiles, if you touch them on the nose, they get hypnotized. Saltwater taffy's made through saltwater crocodiles.

Saltwater taffy's made through saltwater crocodiles. Saltwater taffy's made through saltwater crocodiles' skin. Come, saltwater croc, come. Love you guys. Hey, I don't gotta dance. I make money. But if I see you now, sweet, that means I'm in love with you. I'm a boss.

You a working bitch. I make love when I see that you go to other hoops. Let's find out what you call me. You know where I'm at. You know where I'll be. You in the club. Sister Carly, I'm there. I get paid a fee.

I be in and I can't take so much. I know these bodies. Honestly, don't give a fuck about who is part of me. Just to make sense, this must both be taken as part of me. I don't bother when these hoes don't let these hoes bother me. They these pictures, they they go. Bitch, I'm cool. They shot of me.

Look, I might just sit in some bed. I might just sit with some food. I might just stand on your bed. My thorns, you feel like a leg. You want to come in and stay. I might go stay. I let him do what he wants. You got me each other wrong.

And then you win. When you go back to the boat, I got you broken into two. I'm not a hot ass in the street. Know you probably heard of me. Got up and bang and fix my teeth. Hope you was no big deal. And I feel my mama feel. I ain't got no time to chill.

I think these hoes be mad at me. They baby bother rollin' up hoes. They low bitch, you can fuck with me if you want to. These fans, they be spread by the people who love you. If you fuck, I can get them both. I don't want it to. Then I'm quick, cutting me off. So come to come for love.

I don't dance now. I make money moves. Say, I don't got a dance. I make money moves. If I see you now, please tell me it's on purpose. You want a boss, you want a purple fist. I make blood moves. You a pussy, you can pop.

You a pussy, you a pop. That's what come around my way. You can't hang around my clock. And I take sick minds. Sometimes I want rich, I'm rich, I'm rich. I put my head up with my head. My bitch is 50, 50, 50. I think I did the money in gold.

You did it high like a stone. My pussy's better as gold. Tell that little bitch they ho-roll. I did the rope in the hole. I just came up with no ring. I need to bring up the bag. No, I need to bring up the bag. I need to know that you fall as long.

They know that they made it to stay. I will stick to the stick. Only the rule can relate. I used to look in the piece. Now I agree with the date. Money better on the lack of the date. I feel like these bitches go. If they gave these boys for cash.

I just want to check with you. Another chip of mine. That's the little bitch. You can talk to me if you want to. He's a bitch. This is bad for these girls. This is cool. I think they're both out on the floor.

And I'm close to them niggas. But don't get drunk boy. Look, I don't dance now. I make money moves. Say I don't cry to dance. I make money moves. But I see you now. I speak to me.

It's all for you. I'm a boss. You are both a bitch. I make love moves. Love moves. Love moves. Love moves. Love moves.

Love moves. Love moves. Love moves. Love moves. Love moves.