Pardon My Take - Tennis Pro Genie Bouchard, Hot Seat/Cool Throne, Billy's 1 Rep Max And Guys On Guys

Episode Date: April 20, 2022

We're recording early because Big Cat and Hank are in Chicago so we talk Monday Night's playoff games and Kyrie getting fined. (00:02:35-00:26:18)Hot Seat/Cool Throne and Billy Football tries for his one rep max on air. (00:27:17-00:50:33) Tennis Pro Genie Bouchard joins the show live in studio to talk Tennis, her career, how we would do against her, and tons more. (00:52:15-01:37:11) We finish with the first ever Guys on Guys with Joey and Pat from the Out And About Podcast. (01:38:34-02:08:40)You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/PardonMyTake

Hey, pardon my take listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime members can listen, add free on Amazon Music. On today's pardon my take, we have tennis pro Jeannie Bouchard. First time we've ever had a tennis player on the show. Great interview in person, in the studio.

Awesome time. We also have our good friends Pat and Joey from the Out and About podcast. Our colleagues for the first ever guys on guys, we're going to talk a little NBA playoffs. We're going to also see Billy try to hit his one rep Max live on the show. Go watch it on the pardon my take YouTube as well.

And hot seat, cool throne. And before we do that, we are brought to you by our friends at Game Time. NBA playoffs officially are underway and Game Time is the only place we're getting our tickets. We got tickets for the Celtics at Nets this Monday coming up with Game Time app. We will be in the building.

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and tweet us a screenshot of your Game Time account with hashtag Game Time NY or hashtag Game Time Shy for a chance to win two tickets. Again, tickets to the Bucks Bulls Game 4. Tweet Game Time Shy, hashtag Game Time Shy with a screenshot of your Game Time app profile and tickets to the Nets Celtics.

Use hashtag Game Time NY with a screenshot of your profile. Also, if you haven't used Game Time app yet, use code PMT for $20 off your first purchase. Download the Game Time app and tweet us a screenshot of your account with hashtag Game Time NY or hashtag Game Time Shy

for a chance to win two tickets to the Nets first Celtics or Bucks first Bulls game. Okay, let's go. Welcome to part of my take presented by Game Time, the number one app for tickets these NBA playoffs. If you are looking for tickets, use code PMT. You get $20 off your first purchase. We're giving away tickets for the Bucks Bulls Game 4

and Nets Celtics Game 4. If you download the Game Time app, screenshot us your profile and use hashtag Game Time Shy or Game Time NY and you will get possibly free tickets to Game 4. Today is Wednesday, April 20th. The Warriors are back, but we also should make jokes about being high

if you want to do that. Oh, I thought you were going to say something about the age man's birthday, but yeah. I'm not a drug guy, have not partaken today, might partake later on this afternoon, but I feel like it's when people go to the bar on like St. Patrick's Day and all the old drunks in the corner,

like this is a day for amateur zone professional. You know, like 420 is a day when real stoners, real ganja heads out there. They're like, not for me. It's legal everywhere. So it doesn't, it's completely lost the allure from 15 years ago when it was like, oh, this is kind of cool.

And they show the video from Boulder where they were just billowing clouds coming up. But yeah. I'm looking forward to the early morning text that we'll get from Chris Long just saying happy holidays. Yeah, you'll be like, hey guys, we made another trip around the sun. Happy birthday to all of us.

That's what he sends us every 420. But yes, the Warriors are back. I'd say that's the lead story. The Warriors are back, maybe not for long because I just placed a future on them. But the Warriors are back. Yeah, I think we called that right. Like we're the Warriors podcast.

Nobody out there believes in the Warriors and where they all forgot about the Warriors. And they very quickly turned into the Warriors that we all know and love. It was the third quarter Warriors. Like that's what we've always said about the team. But actually last night's third quarter Warriors, that was the best third quarter Warriors of all time.

They were awesome. They were, it was like, what, 70? It was some run where they scored, I think it was like 70 points in 19 minutes or something. Or maybe it was even more. It was crazy. We should note, by the way, Hank and I are in Chicago for the Dozen Trivia.

So we are not going to record after the games tonight. We'll be back to regularly recording after the games on Thursday. So we're going to talk mostly Monday games. We've got some great interviews for you. But yeah, you're right, PFT. That was insane what they did, what they put on. I do want to just, because we have at times flirted

with being a Nuggets podcast. And I want to say something for the Nuggets fans out there because they're going through it. It sucks. I, everyone's bashing Jokic because he's not been good in this series, but he also has no one on his team. And everyone's trying to take away his MVP case for this year. So I went and looked back because I was just curious.

Because the MVP is a regular season award. How many times do you think in the last 20 years, the MVP in the NBA has won the title? It's like never, right? So it's happened four times, twice by LeBron, Steph Curry, and then Tim Duncan in the 03, 2002, 2003. Now, how many times has the MVP lost in the first or second round of the playoffs in the season they've won it?

I think, wait, they've lost in the first or second round of the playoffs in their MVP season. In their MVP season. I think it's a lot. I think it's probably like 12 times. It's a little less than that, but it's seven times that that's happened. And like, obviously their guys have gotten to the Western

Eastern Conference Finals. But my point being is that it's a regular season award. And a lot of times the MVP of the season is the MVP because he dragged a team that probably shouldn't have been where they were in the playoffs to the playoffs. And then they get there and much like what's happening right now with the Nuggets, the Warriors are like, Oh, you got one guy.

Okay, that's not hard to stop in the NBA playoffs. And you get this. And it's like Dirk lost in the first round. Remember that year where he lost to the Warriors. You had James Harden losing in the second round, Russell Westbrook losing in the first round. So my long point here is I'm not taking away from the Nuggets or Jokic.

The Warriors are just really good. And you can win an MVP, which he probably will, his back-to-back MVP. And that doesn't mean that you have the best team because that's just not what the award is. Yeah. And I think that that Dirk series, they were the number one seed overall, right?

And they were playing against the eight seed Warriors. So I agree with you. I had the take that I thought the Nuggets could make some noise this season, which I'm not going to back off of because I think I was right in a sense. But here's what I was right about. The team, when they're healthy, I think is still a legitimate title contender.

So they're obviously missing Jamal Murray. They're missing Porter. And Jamal Murray just came out today and said, I think he tweeted, y'all don't think I want to be out here. So like everybody that's saying Jamal Murray is the reason why he's not playing, he's saying, no, it's the team. I actually think what the Nuggets are doing,

this is right now, this is the season before the season. So this postseason is they kind of intentionally fucked up their team by keeping two of their star players out. People are going to forget about the Nuggets. They brought in Boogie. There's no better way to create just like a complete disaster than having Boogie cousins on your team. So what they're going to do is after this season's over,

after this off season's over, they're probably going to get swept by the Warriors, maybe steal a game. But they're going to get rid of Boogie cousins. They're going to bring back the two of their three best players. And then they're going to be like, thank God, Boogie is not here. Now we're all ready to go from day one as a team.

I think next season's Nuggets, the day that the NBA finals are over, I'm going to put a big future on next year's Nuggets. It's the season before the season. Well, so I'm with you in everything you said, except for the fact that like banking on Michael Porter Jr. being healthy is, you just can't ever do that because he was, he had back surgery in college.

And it's always like, that's no knock on him. It's just hard for him to stay on the court. But yeah, they're, they're done now. If you saw the post game, all the quotes were like, we got to stay together. We can't let our folk, like we have to stick together as a team. We got to, we got to dig deep and find it, find out if we're guys that fight through things like this,

just basically the last gasp of a team that knows it's absolutely screwed because the Warriors are back. And then I'm like, the other big story from Monday night and these playoffs is the Sixers look awesome. And Tyrese Maxie has basically made everyone in Philadelphia forget who Ben Simmons was and is, and I have to ask, I have to kick it to our resident Philly Lover in Henry Lockwood.

Are you a little scared? I'm not a little scared. I'm also just focused on the nets. You know, you can only worry about the opponent in front of you. So, and if we were to play the Sixers at 1P for a while, and I also have some Philly Love coming up for myself later on in Hot Sequel Throne. Oh, nice.

But yeah, that was, we joked like the Heat were the most disrespected one seed and the Sixers felt like the team that everyone was picking against. And they've two games, series isn't over, but those are two very strong statements on the level they're playing at versus the Raptors. And Joel and Bede just, he goes nuclear.

And these little spurts, I think he had, was it like 19 points in the first half last night? Like 20 in the first quarter. Yeah. He's dominant when he wants to be. And I think, I don't think that he like takes plays off. I don't think that when he doesn't want to be, it's not because he like lacks any motivation.

I think he just gets tired. Imagine just like the size of him, the amount of effort that he has to put forth to be dominant. It's got to be exhausting just to walk around. I think if I was Joel and Bede's size, this is why I'm short. But if I was his size and I was walking just down the street to work, I would just need to take a nap.

No, I mean, it's often said when it comes to the NBA, like big men don't usually love basketball because it's very arduous for them. I mean, would you, I'm not saying Joel and Bede doesn't love basketball, I think he clearly does. But you see it often where big men are out there and their job is to just go and bang bodies for 45 minutes a night, run up and down,

and also be freakishly big with huge joints, and it's got to suck. But he is, he is like, when he wants to dominate, he dominates more than anyone right now in the NBA. Man, it might be a hot take. Trying to think I'm going through it, going through it. Kyrie wants to dominate. No, I feel confident.

I feel confident when I'm saying, if Bede, there's less of an answer for Joel on Bede when he wants to dominate than anyone else at this current moment in the NBA. So he should be the MVP. He should, yeah, there we go. And he should be the MVP because you're just about to get swept, fucking bum.

Yeah, I'm disappointed that we're not going to get to drop any more big caseurito memes this season. Yeah, and we also had, That's going to have to be put on pause. We had the MAVS, the MAVS Jazz series, which you can just tell the hierarchy when they throw that series on NBA TV, and you're like, oh, okay, yep, makes sense.

We know where everything stands here. And that's no slight against the MAVS because if Luca was playing, it probably would be different. But I'm staying firm. I've heard a little bit of pushback from some jazz fans. I'm staying firm. I just want this team out of my face. And you should too, because they don't like each other.

And I don't know if you saw Quinn Snyder after, but Quinn Snyder looks like a dude, like five years from the future, who's lost all his money on NFTs. He's just wears all black to all his press conferences. He's still got like kind of a young, stylish look, but he's got big bags under his eyes. And he just looks like at one second,

he's going to be like, yeah, we don't have an answer for Jalen Brunson. And then next he's going to be like, yeah, I sunk all my money into board apes. And it didn't work out. I actually think he looks like a dude from the past. I think he looks like a sweaty salesman. Time travel.

Like a guy from, he's the fixer that you see behind the scenes in like Mad Men. Any time any of those guys gets arrested for like sexual assault, he goes and shows up with a case of money and bails him out of jail. He's also maybe the most consistent sweater that I've seen in the NBA.

Like he's not a big sweater in terms of like, he doesn't sweat really through his suits that much. Like you see with a Sean Miller, but he is always glistening. And he always has that like, that dapper like hairstyle that looks like he's, I don't know, it looks like a, the first jazz musician that discovered hair.

He's like Steve Lavin had that look. Remember Steve Lavin had that look? Yeah. Where it's just that slick back where it's like, I don't know if you're greasy or you're really well put together. Just always on that line. I think they should allow Quinn Snyder

to smoke cigarettes on the sideline. I think that would look good for him. I would agree with that. He strikes me as someone who might offer you a clove though. You'd be like, really, bro? What, it tastes better. No, it crackles when you smoke it in. It's so sick.

All right. So should we do predictions for tonight's game? Cause we're not recapping again Thursday. We'll be back to the regular scheduled program. Just a weird night because we have trivia. So let's do a prediction. You want to do a prediction for tonight's games? All right.

It sounds stupid. Go ahead, Hank. Heat Timberwolves pelicans. Oh, did you see the Chris Ball stat? No. Oh yeah. Chris Paul, by the way, Sunday night. We joke about Chris Paul because we like to go after

our good friend, Ryan Rosillo, who he, he said, I think his exact quote about Chris Paul's performance on Sunday night. He was like, everything that I do in my life, you know, watch too much NBA, don't have kids, don't have like a wife, don't have all these other things. And I just sit in as a recluse and watch NBA. It was all validated by Chris Paul's performance

on Sunday night. So he's good. He's in a good mental spot right now. That's awesome. That's great to hear. I did see that stat. Are you talking about the Scott Foster stat? 12 straight playoff losses for Chris Paul

and Scott Foster referees. Oh man. That dribble move he did was so sick where he was, he was just toying with the pelicans. I don't even, I watched it so many times, I couldn't really fully figure out what exactly he was doing. And it had everyone stunned and he was, he was incredible. I mean, I still, I put a future on the Warriors.

I'm Dub's nation because I think Chris Paul will eventually get hurt. But let's at least mention the fact that he was incredible on Sunday night. This is going to be the ultimate test of the Scott Foster trend. Because like there's no chance, there's no way in hell that the Sun should lose to the pelicans.

After what we've seen from both these teams, like there's no way that it happens, right Hank? No, I'm saying it's going to happen. All right. So I'll take the pelicans on the spread, but I'm not going to take them straight up. I like the pelicans. I think the heat and I do think the Grizzlies

will, will bounce back, make it one one. I like the heat also. I, I'm going to stick with the wolves. I like it. I'll do it too. Yeah, I'm sticking with the wolf nation, baby. All right. I'm, I'm.

It's going to be my line. Wolvesing it. Yeah, you're right. Well, no reason. You know what I did right there? That's when, uh, when an underdog wins game one and you just sort of like assume like, ah, you know what, it will even out game two.

No, fuck that. Wolves are going to, well, raised by wolves. Raised by wolves. Let's go. It's going to be in Memphis. There's probably not going to be another protester. Maybe I think if there's a protester, I think that there should be one because if you're a Minnesota fan and you've

seen the last two games get infiltrated by protesters, you've got a winning streak going during your games. You have to, you got to just protest. Find something new. Like I'm sure that the owner of the wolves has killed another bird since the last game. Let's, let's make it happen. Stick with the trend.

Did you guys see the video that John Morant posted on Instagram though to hype this up? No. He posted the MJ clip about losing one game. Oh no. I got to watch this. This is going to decide. It's from the last dance.

Just search John Morant MJ on Twitter and it comes up. It's got a hundred thousand likes. I don't know how I feel about that though. I like John Morant, but I don't think if you're John Morant and you can be just out there posting MJ clips and being like, this is so me right now. It's just him holding the baseball bat. All right.

Hold on. Yeah. He's, I don't like that. I think you have to wait. You have to like let the team account post that for you or you have to have one of your teammates post. Yeah, but I don't think you can be like, man, I'm so MJ. But remember the, the number one hype video of himself guy

has a few rings, Julian Edelman. So you don't know. Right. But, but Julian Edelman is not out there being like, look at me. I'm, I'm waiting for that. Where is it? I don't see it.

He's letting other people. I don't see it. I don't see it on his Instagram right now, but if you search on Twitter, it's like a viral video. It has 1.8 million views. And it was posted by him? The search, I mean, this screenshot says it was,

and it has a hundred thousand. It says jaw posting this on Instagram. Oh no. So if he deleted now, it's definitely the T-wolves. So did it deleted? Yeah, that's even worse. Oh no, it wasn't deleted. If it's the second swipe on his second most recent.

Oh, wow. That's, so he kind of hit it. I would say that's, that's even worse than deleting it, putting as the second swipe. So you see the one where it says Morant on the white jersey? Swipe. And it's there. Hmm.

The second swipe is always where you bury the bad shit. I feel like this is, that's, I like the fact that he's trying to motivate himself. But like that clip of MJ, he'd already, you know what I mean? There's, there's a little different between John Morant and his current state in his career year three versus that clip of MJ.

So, hmm. The quote from MJ. So what? We lost one game. Well, it'll be a dogfight tomorrow, but that's all right. Let's see if all that trash talking starts when it's 0-0 instead of a five, six point lead. That's where it starts.

That's the sign of a good man. If you can talk shit when it's even score or when you're behind score, when you're ahead, it's easy to talk. T-wolves. This is going to blow up in our face. That was MJ's words. I guess that's.

This is going to blow up in our face. Grizz Nation is going to be very mad at us. That's okay. We got to, and we made our pick. That's all right. Watch the last dance. I still like the Grizzlies. I might even, I might take the Grizzlies game three.

You just can't, we can't go against what our heart is saying. And that's the Timberwolves are very, very fun. And the fact that there's been a protester at all their games is also very fun. They're a great story right now. Oh. Also, have we not talked about this yet? Anthony Edwards.

He named his dog Anthony Edwards Jr. That's an awesome move. I love that. I actually met a guy, one of Fight's friends that came to the beach house this summer. His name's Mikey. He's got a dog named Mikey Jr. And it was the best combination of all time.

Like you can't hate on a guy and a dog that has the same name. Yeah. No, I think that's great. I absolutely agree. It also reminded me of our boss, Dave, bet on the Cubs the other day because Mark Leiter Jr. was on the mound and he thought it was Al Leiter Jr.'s son. Oh, wow.

I can't believe White Sox actually did that. No, Dave Portnoy. Oh, OK. But being like, he tweeted, he was just like, Mark Leiter Jr. isn't Al Leiter Jr.'s son. No. All right. Hand up.

When I drafted, when I drafted Raul Mondisi, Aldo Berto Mondisi last year, I thought it was the same Raul Mondisi as I watched in like 1993. So, yeah. Why not? Legends never die. It's the scene. One last thing before we get to Hot Sea Cool Throne.

Kyrie got fined $50,000 and I thought Kevin Durant's statement on it was like incredible. Kevin Durant, I don't think I've ever switched from not liking an athlete to loving an athlete harder than I have with Kevin Durant. It's crazy. So his, I don't know if you saw his statement, but he essentially was like,

the reason why Boston fans are feeling this way and are so vocal about it is because they once loved Kyrie and then he left. And that's what happens with fans. Like when I went, when I left OKC, the same fans that were rooting for me one day were calling me Soft and Cupcake the next. And that's just part of sports.

And you can't get upset about it. You can't, you can't take that personally. I was like, holy shit. Kevin Durant, like you're right. Yeah. No, no, he's a million percent right. There are two reasons why fans end up hating a player from another team.

One is if they just kick the shit out of you constantly, like absolutely destroy you and your soul and own you repeatedly and repeatedly and repeatedly again and again on national television. All right. You're going to, it's too specific now. Derek Jeter. I was talking about Derek Jeter and then Boston.

That's why Red Sox fans hated Jeets. And then if a player that you used to love turns his back on you. That's, I think that's a legitimate reason. Like Kevin Durant, Sneaky is like a pretty good psychiatrist and just tapped into the emotions of sports fans. Stomped on love. If you're Kyrie, 50, you're going to get, you're going to get the smoke brought to you.

And he even said to, he was talking about Kyrie, like his gestures to the fans and everything. He's like, some days you might be, he might be into it. Some days he's not. Like this is, I don't know. I just thought it was very interesting. Kevin Durant just being like, we're human. Just because next, you know, game two happens,

if he's not the same type of back and forth with fans, it doesn't really mean that it's, he's lost intensity or anything. It's just some days it hits you a different way and you respond a different way. Kevin Durant, fucking smartest athlete of all time. Yeah. The ecosystem of sports isn't just always as simple

as like a guy being like, I paid money for the ticket so I get to yell at you. Or then the other player being like, just because you paid money for a ticket doesn't mean that you can yell at me. It's not that simple. It's like there are actual complex emotional relationships that fans have with their teams,

with their opponents, with former players, with current players. And it goes back from the, from the player to the fans as well. Like sports is, Kevin Durant actually beautifully summed that up in a way that I think not many people have thought of. But I also think, I also think that Kyrie Irving would be like $50,000 to flip off all the Celtics fans

like three times. Yeah, that's easy. Well worth the price of a mission right there. I love this rivalry going back and forth. Hank, do you think that he should have been suspended? Wait, let me just one last thing because Kevin Durant's last statement on it was like perfect. He said, it's rooted in love.

They once loved you, once cheered for you and brought your, and bought your merchandise, had life altering experiences coming to games watching you play. Sometimes it gets a little dark and deep but that's just how the human brain works. We understand all that and the fans understand where we come from too

because we have our own platforms and speak on stuff like this. It's healthy once everyone understands both sides. That's perfectly said. Once you understand why a fan is mad at a player and why a player has a reaction back to the fan, it's like this is, this is great. This is what sports should be.

So this is actually how us as guys learn about emotional relationships with each other. It's when an athlete explains it to us and we're like, oh shit, yeah, that's why I'm mad. It's a feeling called jealousy. It is crazy how much I love Kevin Durant now. If you had told me four years ago, I don't think I've ever switched this much on one player.

Where? Who? JJ? No, because JJ I still could say is sometimes has loser moments. I don't think Kevin Durant has loser moments anymore. I think he's honestly him all the time. It's when he lost his burner

and was like, here's who I am. Everything kind of switched. And he was like, I'm always on. If I clap back at you, that's what I'm gonna do. It makes me feel good. Like, I don't know. It's just everything changed. I almost want to start hating on him again

just in the hopes that he'll ghost me. That's like, that's how good he's been at the internet recently. I agree with you. We used to call him. It was mostly you. Oh, don't wow. Come on.

You're part of it too. But yeah, I agree. Kevin Durant's an awesome guy. Seems like a cool hang. Hank, how many games do you think Kyrie should have been so successful? He definitely should have been fine more money. But I saw some people chirping Boston fans

because there was a chant at Fenway, like a fuck Kyrie chant, which I loved. To me, that's just a city united. We're all on the same page. It doesn't matter what sport we're at. We all know where the goal is, where our hate needs to be directed.

I think that's a sign of a great sports town. Do you think that they should have played a game on Monday night, like going the whole Patriots Day thing? You get the daytime Red Sox game, you get the marathon, and then you get a night game, Celtics against Kyrie.

That would have been sick. Yeah, I mean, it's all great. It's sports are the best. This is why we watch. This is why we love it. Billy. So Hank, you're calling New York a great sports town because they did it with Trey Young first

at the Yankees game. Oh, wow, got you there. Oh, that's a sign of a great sports town. Cats and dogs getting along. New York has great sports fans. Their teams just suck. That's not their fault. All right, let's do Hot Seed Cool Throne.

And then we have great interviews coming up. We'll do Jeannie Bouchard first in person, first tennis player we've ever had on. Before we get to Hot Seed Cool Throne, a quick word from our friends at Bird Dogs. Bird Dogs have the best shorts, joggers, pants. In the game, I've been addicted to their pants. Here's a little pro tip.

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They also have their shorts that are coming up summertime. Shorts are back. Keep the gooch and grunt all cool and comfortable while doing literally everything this summer. Go to birddogs.com at your promo code PMT and they'll throw in a free Bird Dogs dad hat. That's birddogs.com promo code PMT for a free Bird Dogs dad hat with your pair of Bird Dogs.

When you think summer, think Bird Dogs. They're the only bottoms you need. You will not take these things off. I promise you. Bird Dogs.com promo code PMT. Hank, you start. Hot Seed Cool Throne. My hot seed is the charts, the radio this summer.

Just anyone that likes to listen to music in general. I think people that go to bars, whatever. Drake posted a picture with Taylor Swift, which means there's probably going to be a song coming, which means it's going to get, it'll probably be a good song, but it will get murdered into the ground and just played in for it. Everywhere, anywhere, at all times, all summer.

I love it. And she's a bit old for his taste. But I do think this is going to be like, have we started the most ambitious crossover event of all time? Maybe if we added a Rihanna feature on it, it would just be, that'd be it. I don't think that's happening.

Okay. Oh, do they have. And then just Kodak Black doing the intro. I think there's, I don't think, I don't think there's Drake and Rihanna like beef. Oh, what about, what about Taylor and Kanye? Possibly. That would be.

That would be, that would be the most ambitious crossover. Yes, ever. That actually would be an ambitious crossover. That would be incredible. And then your Cool Throne? My Cool Throne is Meek Mill. Talking about great sports fans. City of Philadelphia.

I obviously have well documented my hate towards Philadelphia and their fans, but I do like Meek Mill. I've always liked his music. There's an old video of him doing the, in the tunnel before the game. It looks fake. There's like one of those trampolines that the cheerleaders

use and he runs full speeds, jumps, does a front flip and lands on his feet. And everyone just kind of starts clapping. And he did it again last night, which just reinforced, obviously, it was never fake. It's just a hilarious video. Like he just, he's, he's good at doing flips.

Yeah, he's really good at doing flips. And it's just not, it's surprising. It's surprising for, it's a surprising thing to do. It's a surprising thing to see. It makes me laugh every time. So that was, you know, shout out to Meek Mill, shout out to Philly fans. I hope they advance this round just so he does it again.

Yeah. Now it is very, I like any. It's hilarious. I like any stadium that has like a pregame ritual in it. I know up in Seattle, they have somebody raise the 12 flag in Philadelphia. They have somebody like bang the Liberty Bell. They've got that guy at Texas Tech

that jacks off into that metal thing on the sidelines or whatever. I love, I love when people are, one of the stadiums has somebody like that cranks a siren like an alarm that goes off. I'm a big time sucker for those. The horn at Minnesota. Yeah, blowing the big drum in Kansas City.

Yeah, those are great. Those are all great. Yeah. If I was designing a team from scratch, you better believe day one, I'm having some like bizarre pregame ritual where I can bring in like the local celebrities that get the crowd going. Yeah. That's awesome.

All right. PFT, your hot seat, cool throne. Okay. My hot seat is Billy football. Billy is on the hot seat for something that happened today. You guys are in Chicago, so you missed out on it a little bit. Billy's ice dog me right now. I had something that actually was not happy. What happened?

Well, I'll try to walk you guys through it and you'll see some of this on stool scenes and the whole nine yards because it was documented. Billy has done a great job of being a personal trainer to me and really a mentor and a nutritionist. Over the course of the last four months, he's given me the supplements. He's worked out with me here in the studio.

Today, I told Billy, I was like, Hey, Billy, let's go in here. And before we do the podcast with the guys in Chicago, help me see if I can get my one rep max up because I was thinking maybe I could have it, put up a good number today. So Billy grabbed a bunch of people from the office. I was just asking Billy to come down here,

but he picked up like an entire hype squad to come into the studio to hike me up. Like a great teammate, great teammate. And so I got all the videos with people doing max outs. It's like the whole team. You got to have the whole team around. Yeah. I wanted to create that at everybody. We had Kelly Keegs, Fran, Coach Dugs.

Everybody was in the room. No one's in the office. And so I put up the 225, felt pretty good about it. And then Billy was like, yo, toss all the weight on there because Billy saw somebody putting up a one rep max. And he was like, I got a one rep max. Let him finish. Let him finish.

Billy, you can respond. We know that whatever you say is not going to be the truth. That is the truth. So we put all the weight on. Which is how much weight approximately? 275 exactly. We can make an exact calculation because they are weights. And so we put 275 pounds on there.

And I was spotting for Billy. There's a lot of weight. I don't want Billy to get hurt or worse injured. And so I'm standing over him and we lift it up together. He pulls it down, pushes up. And after he pushes up, the left arm buckles and it starts to sink. And you can see that on the video replay.

And so I helped him bring it up because I didn't want him to get hurt. Bring it up to the top and Billy gets up. He's like, did you touch it? I was like, yeah, you were going to die. And he's like, you fucking stole my max from me. And Billy stormed out. He's been freaking out going up to everybody

and telling everybody in the office all afternoon. Wait, this is an easy solution. Just do it right now, Billy. No, I will do it right now if we get a makeshift clip. Because what actually happened right now is he did his max. I think we should do maxes on Tuesdays. I'll do it right now. That's an easy solution.

Let's tie it up with something. Don't do this. No, no, no, PFT, do not touch the bar whatsoever. We didn't have the clip. There isn't a clip on the left side of the bar. So Jake, what happened? What happened? PFT saved my foot.

If there was no clip, the plate would have fell on my foot. Now what if I had a broken toe? Because the plate started falling off. Because your arm buckled Billy. So wait, this is very easy. Wait, no, big cat. So Jake makes a good point. And also, I don't know if you noticed this.

Memes has created a new chart for the part of my Take Studio that's above Jake's shoulder. It's the current one rep max bench press list for all of us as a podcast. So, well, no, we just have you listed in second place, big cat, as father's too. And Jake is 135. Liam can pick up the camera.

Hank is 135. I've seen Hank put up 135 before personally. I think he bumped that up. And Memes is too much. And then Billy is in last place, not applicable in A, because he hasn't completed one rep max yet. So what happened was, by the way, I said I didn't want one rep max. Billy, I don't know why you're still talking.

Just put up the weight. I will. Let's get a clip. Yeah, do it. Because last time the plates fell off. Last time the plates fell off. And that's why I couldn't. OK, so do it.

Just tie your shoelace around it. Hank, am I going crazy? Just go do it. Just do it. Yeah, just do it. Let's go, Billy. Let's go. All right, we're doing it.

We're doing it. I'm getting fired up. This is going to be awesome. I'm getting fired up on this chest. Billy, Billy. Don't touch the bar under any circumstances, PFT. By the way, everyone, go watch this at YouTube. This is a good way to subscribe.

All right, so go subscribe on YouTube. I'm afraid that Billy's going to get hurt. I'm afraid Billy's going to get hurt. No, no, no, no, no. This is all going in the podcast. He doesn't want me to do it, because he knows I'm going to do it. Yeah, exactly. Redemption, Billy.

Redemption. Awesome. He's tying. Oh, he's tying an electrical cord. Hank and I will narrate. That doesn't seem to say. He's tying an electrical cord on the weights here as the clip. Do you think he got this?

I actually think he will. Same with me. I mean. Because I think Billy responds well to. Billy ran a marathon. He also responds well to embarrassment. Like, if he gets embarrassed, he gets so upset that he then comes back and bounces back.

We had to run a marathon, and he actually ran a marathon. That's kind of when I gave him the like, I'll give him the benefit of the doubt. Yeah. In these situations. I'm not going to touch the bar. Jake's going to come over here and monitor the plate. If the plate starts to slip here,

he's going to nudge it back horizontally. I'm not going to help Billy go to the bar. Here we go. Yeah. And we'll narrate. It's he's he's laying down on the bar right now. Again, go watch on on Pardon My Take YouTube. Stretching.

You should go watch on Pardon My Take YouTube. And his arms loose. The shows are up earlier now. We're in a camo sweatshirt. He's he's feeling good. He's I don't know what he's doing with his hair right now. All right, Billy. Let's go.

He's breathing heavily before Jake has it. Jake has his headphones on. Also, I box this morning. That's why I didn't want to max out. I have I have I box for an hour this morning. So there's no glycogen in my muscles. No excuses. Here he goes.

Oh, he's doing the smelling salts, which some may say is illegal. Oh, oh, if this drops right on his chest, it's going to be so funny. I got this. I think he's not got this. I believe in three. Oh my god, Billy.

Billy, this is your hot seat cool throne. You can't hear you. Here we go. Jake three. Three. Here it goes. Shut the mobile muscle. Here we go.

For the bench press. Three and two. Here it goes. Oh, that's just one. Three, two, one. Here he goes. And he's up. He's up.

He's up. He's got it. Yeah. Yeah. He's kicked half the studio over. Oh, that was impressive. There we go. Yeah.

I mean, we called it, Hank. We called it. Billy, good job. Billy, we called it. Billy. I'm so glad we got that. There you go. I've been getting so much shit in the office today.

So you took off your headphones. You couldn't hear what we were saying, but you'll be able to listen back on the pod. Hey, Billy, can I tell you something? Hank and I both said that you were going to do it because we're like the one thing that Billy does is he responds well to embarrassment. So we said you were going to do it.

All the shit that Billy was getting was very much so that he couldn't stop talking. Right, of course. Yeah, no, no. I was getting attacked on all sides. He was getting attacked. Can we, so in order just to tell the story fully, I think that we should put out the video of Billy.

Yeah, yeah. Put that on part of my take YouTube. But before we put this video out. Yeah, it'll be on PMTV. Yeah, PMTV. Okay, perfect. And then watch Billy do the actual, complete the actual bench press

on the part of my take YouTube. Great job, Billy. Proud of you. Appreciate it. Good job, Billy. My cool throne. My cool throne is Sam Darnold. Sam Darnold, future starting quarterback

of the Carolina Panthers, because Ben McAdoo was asked if Sam Darnold was a starter, and he said yes immediately. But then record scratch, Ben McAdoo had to go in front of the press being like, and this is a quote, that is something that I should not have said. So Sam Darnold was named the starting quarterback

for Panthers for about, I think, two and a half hours. And more importantly, it's just an excuse to get Ben McAdoo back in the national news, because he's looking smooth as ever. Him and Matt Rule probably paint in Charlotte red when they go out at night to the bars. He's looking awesome. I do miss having Ben McAdoo around.

And it's very funny when you see a very, a naturally goofy guy like that, always try to look stylish. I was like, and it's like, if Mr. Bean thought that he was actually James Bond and dressed accordingly, that's what you get with Ben McAdoo and his swag here. It's awesome.

I miss him being a head coach. And that, that oversized suit is one of my favorite pictures of all time. All right, my hot seat is Burner Accounts. So I was, I'm in Chicago. I went and visited my guys, Waddle and Sylvie. They have a great show on ESPN 1000. I go on every week, but I went in person.

And Sylvie, who's a very, very good host, the best in the business, he has uncovered Chris Bryant's dad's Burner Account. And it feels good. I feel like we haven't had a Burner Account in a really long time. So the Burner Account, the name is TWMB917, TW being because he, Ted Williams is his idol,

Chris Bryant's dad's idol. MB being, wait, what was that? What is MB? I don't remember. Something Bryant. Oh, oh, Mike Bryant, his name. Nine being Ted Williams and 17 being Chris Bryant's number. And he just responds to everyone.

And he has some very funny response. He said to someone who said, Cubs offered 200 million two years ago, but Boris said he could get Chris Bryant more. And he responded, oh yes, another ignorant cockwamble stuck on stupid. Chris Bryant was never offered 200 million ever. In fact, the Cubs never offered him an extension.

You stupid dumbass. Ha ha. He already made 70 million. Ha ha. What was that word that he invented? Cockwamble. Cockwamble. Cockwamble.

Yeah. I like those guys that are like, this has been a cross the middle of the day. Like people that just invent sayings that nobody uses. Cockwambler is going to make its way into the lexicon. I don't know if I disagree ethically with revealing burner accounts or doxing people, Big Cat. There's been a lot of that going around recently.

Yeah, I think it's, I have no problem with them having the burner account, but we have to like talk about it when it gets revealed. I don't blame Chris Bryant's dad at all. I think it's a great move. I would do the same thing for my son. Like, why wouldn't you? It's just when it gets revealed,

we have to have a good laugh about it. That's a fact. That's the rules. I love Cockwamble. Cockwamble is a great baseball. Yeah, he also, yeah, go ahead. I was going to say memes just texted us Brian Kelly's burner. Brian Kelly has a burner.

Oh, the frog account? Oh yeah, yeah, that's right. The other one, you know it's Chris Bryant's dad because a lot of them are aggressive. And then the one that actually made me laugh the most was blog finds Matt Clap who does a great job with the Cubs tweeted that was easily the cheapest double of Chris Bryant's career.

And he responded makes up for the Homer he hit that got robbed by Melky Cabrera against the White Sox a few years ago. It's like, what? So he's really, he's really fight. Yeah, I'm, I'm, I want it very much on the record. Mike Bryant should keep doing this. He has every right to defend his son.

We're going to laugh about it when we find it, but I love this. Like, why wouldn't you do this? I like burner accounts too. I might hop back on mine. I might get back to that lifestyle. That's, it's fun. Just tweeting, just like replying to people tweeting

whatever you want with the account. Yes, yes. And then my cool throne, I have two. Duke is on my cool throne. John Shire finally cleaning up the program. Michael Savarino, Coach K's grandson is hitting the transfer portal. So Sean, probably be a name that's

John Shire got inherited a mess. What if he goes to Chapel Hill? I have, I have this league. Was he going to drive there? Actually, you know where he's going to drive there? Careful. You know where he's going to go, right? Probably a good culture fit up in Syracuse.

So shout out John Shire. And then my other cool throne is Canada because I've decided I put a future on the Calgary front flames. I'm going to bring a cup to, to Canada. Personally, I want to bring a cup to Canada. So if anyone wants to hop in with me, they, they're a very fun team.

They score a lot of goals. They probably won't win the cup, but I put a future on them. Substantial future. I'm a Calgary, Calgary flames fan for the playoffs. I'm bringing a cup to Canada. I don't think they've had one in like 25, 30 years. I'm doing it.

I think you got the wrong team. The Leafs? The Leafs. I asked about the Leafs. I think this is the year. I think this is the year. This is the year. Well, you and Matthews play well.

I tweeted, can the flames win the cup? No, it's the Leafs. I tweeted, can the flames win the cup? And everyone responded no. So I was like, okay, yeah, they probably can. But I'll add the Leafs too. I might do, but you know what? I'll do it.

At least and flames. Parlain. No, you can't. No, I'm, I'm both win. I'm on the Leafs already. That's the play. I'm adding the Leafs. This is their year.

This is Leafs here, man. I'm the Leafs and Flames. It's happening. I'm bringing the cup. All I care. Austin Matthews is playing really, really well right now. They're smoking teams. Also Calgary is one of those.

I always forget that Calgary is out West. For some reason I always think that it's out West. Yeah, no, I'm adding. But they do the stampede out there. I'm adding the Leafs. I just want to bring a cup to the fine people of Canada because I'm sick of them not having a cup and us making jokes.

Hank's watching me put it in. Boom. Leafs and Flames. Listen, I'm not sick of making the jokes, but I did also take out a future on the Leafs. I think that they can do it this year. There's no chance. Like there's no way.

I think they've actually exhausted all the heartbreaking ways to lose in the playoffs. I think that there's just, they can't find another way. The only way out right now is to win. That's what they're going to do. I just, I was trying to figure out because the Blackhawks are not in the playoffs or even close.

And I do love, I love NHL playoffs. I was like, I need to have a rooting interest. My rooting interest is just simply bringing a cup to Canada. One way or another. Fans are back, man. I'm going to do it for the Canadian people. You know, you know what we should do? We should bring back Todd and Gordon.

Yeah. Let's do it. Billy. I got a good one. My hot seat is the USFL. Running back, Davion Smith was cut from the Pittsburgh Mahlers for ordering pizza instead of chicken salad. I think this was a work.

So a pit. Yeah, it was weird. The story down that up in my mind. So basically the Pittsburgh Mahlers sent out a memo saying that he had violated three team rules in 24 hours. And that was just the last straw. This was all aired on league programming, sort of an inside the USFL type show.

And he claims that he never violated any league rules. So it's all starting to look murky. The USFL and the Pittsburgh organization is not looking too good. And Smith is very angry. OK. Yeah. I'm with Hank on this.

It's a work. I think it's, yeah, it's absolutely stay woke on this because what's going to happen, they're going to bring them back. And then that'll be a storyline going into one of the games. And people will be like, oh, look, it's the guy that got caught for the pizza. Everybody tune in and watch this. Agreed.

My question is it, was it chicken salad or a chicken salad? You know what I'm saying? Because chicken salad's pretty disgusting. Wait, what? Wait, what? The option was chicken salad or pizza. And they said, we only got chicken salad. And he's like, can I have pizza?

And it's like, are you OK with that? And he like said like a no. Wait, you think chicken salad's disgusting? Apparently. Well, like chicken Caesar salad's one thing. But like chicken salad, that's like potato salad. Yeah. Yeah, chicken salad's good.

Like on a sandwich? That's just mayonnaise. There is mayonnaise in it. And chicken. But it's also got celery. And depending on how white you are. It's good on a bagel. Raisins and walnuts.

Wraps and walnuts, the Sonoma. That may be a non-popular opinion. That may be my calamari. No, it's not non-pot. Like I think there's probably a lot of people who don't like chicken salad. But saying it's disgusting is I can't agree with that. Me neither.

I think that chicken salad sometimes unfairly gets lumped into the egg salad. Yeah, which is. That's why. Egg salad is fun to make and nothing else. Like it's gross. Because it sloshes around. Right.

Egg salad is good from the moment you make it to like 10 seconds later. And then it's bad after that. If you have like a six-year-old and you want them to like just do something to stay occupied, let them help out making the egg salad. They'll have fun. Don't actually eat it.

Just throw in the garbage. All right, you're cool to run? Is our digging buddy, our digging bro, who we talked about on Monday's episode, got a little update for us. So, all right, so I've spoken with my boyfriend and after a good long chat, I can successfully say mission accomplished.

I sat him down when he came home Thursday night and seriously voiced my concerns both about his safety and about our relationship. He hadn't realized how big an effect this had been having on me in regards to our relationship. And he immediately said that he was going to cut the time he spent out there in half. He said that we could spend the entire weekend together.

And we pretty much did. It was bad. Friday night was spent at home and we went out for a nice dinner Saturday night after spending the day together. Why go out to dinner when you have a whole night? We went out for a nice lazy Sunday. But I could tell that he was getting kind of antsy

and almost nervous after church day. So I told him that he could go ahead and go to his tunnel early if he wanted to. I won't lie, I was kind of hoping that he would stay at home. But we decided to go back out, which was all right by me. I also talked to him about my concerns regarding gases and that y'all made me realize it should be conscious of and he said that he'd work to get some sort of

ventilation system installed ASAP. So basically he's in the clear, he's made enough. This is all, everything you just did is bad. Well, at least he hasn't stopped. One, he's not on the show, which is bad. Two, he's slowing down on his digging, which is also bad. We want this guy to come on and we want to tell him to dig more.

I also found an article about microbes. Okay, well, everything I said was correct just because you had that impression. Yeah, but first of all, this guy, he might also be lying to his fiance. He might be like, yeah, I'll totally slow down on digging the hole. I'll cut back on it. It sounds like something that an addict would say like,

okay, I'll stop doing it except on Fridays and weekends. And then if I really need to blow off some steam, it sounds like he might still be full-fledged into the whole lifestyle. Well, the whole lifestyle hasn't stopped. That's what I'm saying, cool throne. Okay, I'm just, I'm concerned now. Please come on.

You can't stop digging the hole until you reach a goal. Yes, Jake. My hot seat is Tom Brady and Aaron Rodgers. They are teamed up against a pair of fellow recurring guests, Josh Allen and Patrick Mahomes, in the next match. So I think we know who we'll be rooting for in that one, right? Yes. Yeah, these are progressively less interesting.

I'm actually excited that they don't have golfers in this one because it's actually could be fun to watch a bunch of, you know, quarterbacks who aren't great at golf, chit-talking and play golf. Like, I like this. I like this that off of it. It'd be very funny if they had a quarterback. Like, I don't know if Josh Allen plays golf,

but it'd be very funny if he didn't play golf at all. Yeah. And he just told them that he played. And then two guys, like if Aaron Rodgers didn't play golf at all against Josh Allen that had no idea what to do, and then they were out there golfing like us. That would be fun to watch. Yeah.

So that should be interesting, June 1st. My cool throne is Marshawn Lynch. He is now Minority Owner of the Seattle Kraken, along with Macklemore. So good for them. Nice. Yeah, he was also riding a Zamboni. That clip was so funny.

He was doing, he was whipping shitties, as they say in Minnesota, with the Zamboni. It looked very, very fun. Yeah. I'm all on board for more Marshawn Lynch content. Absolutely. Because like all these different brands and networks think that they're going to have Marshawn Lynch on,

and he'll be like the normal, charming, exciting Marshawn Lynch. And this time, he won't say any cuss words. But it's never going to happen. Like they're going to put Marshawn Lynch on the microphone before Seattle Kraken games, and he's just going to go off. Correct. And it's going to be incredible. All that's true.

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Now, here's Jeannie Bouchard. Okay. We now welcome on a very special guest. It is a first. It is a first. It is the first woman we've ever had on Pardon My Take. So... Are you serious?

No, I'm just kidding. First tennis player, though. Actually, first tennis player. We were thinking about it before and we have not had a tennis player on this show. We talk a lot of tennis, but we've never actually had a tennis guest on. We talk tons of tennis.

So it's Jeannie Bouchard. Tennis, pro, superstar, comeback player of the year, this next year, coming back from injury. I'm so honored. Thank you. Thank you for having me as your first tennis player. That's so special. Yes.

So how is the comeback going? How are you feeling physically? It's going really well. Thank you for asking. So I'm rehabbing from my shoulder surgery that I had last June. And the goal is to be playing tournaments very soon. I'm hoping for the French Open in a month.

Okay. So and then after that's Wimbledon, which is like my favorite tournament. So I'm gearing up for that. Is that your best surface? Because I know that's a big difference. Like with tennis pros is like clay versus grass versus hardcore. I grew up, I'm born and raised in Montreal.

So until age 12, I was playing on indoor hard courts. And so that's kind of similar to what grass is. It's pretty fast. And then the clay is obviously slower. I feel like I do well on all surfaces though. Some I know some players like absolutely hate a certain type of surface, but I like all of them.

But I prefer grass and Wimbledon is just my favorite tournament because of how important it is to tennis. Yeah. And you were in the final. So you finished second what? 2014, right? That's right. So that, I mean, again, I'm not a huge tennis fan,

but I feel like I watched the Wimbledon final every year. Was that being there, especially early in your career, that must have been a little like, holy shit, I'm already at this level because that's the tournament. I would assume. Oh, it is. It's like the masters in tennis. So it was it was a huge deal for me.

I think at the time I almost didn't realize how big it was on, you know, when you're in it and you don't like fully realize. So I was just so focused on how I was playing. And I think that helped me achieve those good results. But yeah, it was incredibly special. I was actually named after Princess Eugenie and she was in the stands watching me play in the final. So it was like one of those full circle life moments.

So that was pretty crazy. That is crazy. What do you think you could have done different to win that? You know, I kind of got my butt kicked, not going to lie. I lost to Petra Kravitava. She's very good on the grass and she's a lefty. So she's tough to play.

And yeah, I kind of didn't really even have a chance in that match. So I still to this day have not rewatched that match because I'm like still traumatized from it. Well, that's funny because we actually have it if we want to pull it up on TV. Let's just watch the finals right now. Billy breaks it down stroke by stroke through mechanics.

That sounds like torture. That's a nightmare for me. Yeah. How much of an adjustment is it when you get into? Is there like a clay court season? Yeah. Is that a specific time of year? That's right.

It's basically starting right now. So before each slam, we have the season of whatever surface that is. And it's all these preparation tournaments to play, to culminate with the Grand Slam. I've got a really dumb question about Wimbledon and the grass court there. Do do players ever wear cleats?

Are there like specific shoes that you can wear that have like tiny little studs to give you better traction? That's a great question. We have. She's like, thank you. We have basically regulations, rules on how much we can have these like cleat type of shoes. So we're allowed a little bit of like spikes,

but they can't be like too long or too like pointy because then it destroys the court. So like Wimbledon has to approve your shoes before you play. Basically. Got it. OK, so and then in terms of gear, I feel like tennis fashion has made like a resurgence.

Like people like to wear the like the new balance shoes. You know, the like the old school like tennis logo and stuff. Have you felt that that tennis is getting cooler? I do think so. I think because athleisure wear is so prominent these days that you can kind of mix and match like that. I signed with New Balance a year and a half ago. So I even know that I feel like I jumped on like the cool,

trendy train at the perfect moment because they're dad shoes, but they're also so cool now. And then also their clothes is really cool. They're doing cool collaborations with like fashion brands. And so we get like the best of both worlds. It's awesome. They're super comfortable, too. They're like sweatpants for your feet.

That's why I like wearing new balance shoes. They are. And the the prince brand. I see people wearing prints all the time. That's the tennis brand. It's like it's like old school stuff that's basically coming back in the vintage look. I mean, I think everyone loves that.

I personally love wearing all that type of stuff. Yes. If you haven't figured it out already, we know absolutely nothing about tennis. I was I was going to try to like see how long we could fake it. But then once I asked the cleats question, I was like, that's probably giveaway. I'll give I'll give a tennis question.

When do when do you attack the net? When how often because I've always thought like if I were a tennis player, I just I just fucking go crazy at the net every time because I feel like every time you attack the net, you fuck the other guy up. Yes and no, you want to do it on the right shot. So when you get your opponent out in trouble, like on the side of the core, if you get him moving and you

have an easy ball, then you want to go to the net. If you go to the net on a bad shot, you're going to get passed. So especially nowadays, the rackets are more powerful. And so it's easier for people to hit like big shots, even if they're stretched, even if they're on the run. So going into the net on a bad shot is a terrible idea. Don't do that. Have you ever played with an old racket like the old school

rackets, the wooden rackets? I never have until literally a month ago. I found these two wooden rackets in my grandma's closet. My grandma used to play tennis and I was like, how come you never told me these were here? One of them had a broken string. And then the other one she said was strong like 50 years ago. So I was like, I'm going to take these and bring them to my

practice tomorrow and I hit with it. And it was so like soft because nowadays we play with so much new like advanced like material. And it was just like the soft wood and it's like a gut, you know, it's like natural gut string. So it felt like hitting with a trampoline. That's crazy. What about like the Hawkeye technology?

I'm always impressed with how tennis has incorporated the instant replays because they get it exactly right every time. And it's so satisfying to watch the little like shadow of the ball land on the court. Is there anybody that thinks like, Hey, this technology is bad for tennis like people are like, Oh, I hate VAR and soccer replays ruining the game. Does anybody have that take?

Or most of the players like this is good. I'm glad that they've incorporated this. I'm sure some of the traditionalists and purists don't think it's good for the game. But you know, now they've gone a step further. They've eliminated all the lines people at tournaments. So before you had a lines person who would call it, but then you can challenge if you didn't agree with the call.

Nowadays it's basically just the computer calling it. So I think that takes a bit of the fun out of it because there's no like anticipation of whether it's in or out and there's no like ability to challenge because you're not going to challenge the computer. So you don't challenge anymore. So now there's no more challenges because it's just the computer that pulls it out.

Yeah, I agree with you that the challenge was always fun because it was like, would you, would your coach say like, Hey, challenger, was that just you? You would just do it by eye. Like I felt like that was it. Well, technically you're not supposed to get help from your team whether to challenge or not, but every player secretly looks over and then the coach does like a little signal

like yes, challenger, no doubt. Got it, got it. But now it's gone. Exactly. That's also kind of a bummer because now you don't have somebody to scream at if there's a missed call. Like it's, you know that it's your fault. Exactly.

Like we don't have to talk about Serena who went up to the lines person and was like screaming at her. We're not going to have that anymore. Or yeah, that's good for Djokovic too, right? Yes. It'll help a couple of players. Let me ask you that question. It's a very important question.

Who's the goat on the men's side? Well, technically by slam number now it's Rafa Nadal. But I personally have a soft spot for Roger. I think he's great. But I do think Djokovic is actually the best. Yes. Okay. I basically just gave you a non-edge.

I said all through all. No, you ended up there because we have to redefine it now. What about Roger and his prime against Djokovic and his prime? I'll always pick Roger and his prime. Gross. Come on. Djokovic is the goat. No, we found for sports that we're not watching all the time,

the best way to tap in is to just figure out what the goat debate is and then get people riled up. And it seems like tennis has a very spirited one on the men's side. Serena is clearly the goat on the women's side, right? Like that's not even a question. Yes, to me she is. Yeah, right. So that one's kind of definitive.

But on the men's side, the fact that you have Djokovic who will probably end up with the slams title, Rafa and Federer, and they all have like different peaks, I just love it. I love getting in the goat debate. Yeah, their fan bases are all very aggressive towards the other fan bases. And so it gets a very standard day. Well, Rafa fan bases are losers because he can only win on clay.

Federer fan bases just wear their Swiss watches and think they're better than everyone. It's luxury. And Djokovic goes out and just pows people. Being a Roger Federer stand is a luxury brand. A lot of times a riff raff can't understand how classy it is to cheer for a man like Roger Federer. Exactly.

And by the way, Rafa just won the Australian Open, so. What's that played on? Hard. Oh, yeah. Djokovic didn't play because they banned him. Mickey Mouse. No, that's making us battle. There's a battle.

Yeah, I'm sure he would have won that. Good thank you for proving my point for me. Who's Federer in that tournament? No. Oh, that's interesting. Yeah, Rafa won a tournament without Djokovic or Federer there. Thank you, Janie. OK, there are other good players.

OK. Yes. All right. So we had a question about one of your former boyfriends, not the breakup and all that stuff, but Mason Rudolph, we're football guys. Did the Miles Garrett thing happen while you guys were dating? No, that was before.

Did you talk to him about it at all? Yes. What'd he say? Was he like, I almost died? He almost died. From your perspective, was it assault? Yeah. Wow, you guys are coming with the hard-hitting questions.

You thought we were going to ask something else. Like, we just want more intel on that incident. That's all we care about. I mean, I think they both got fined, right? Yeah. So I think that tells you. Suspended Miles Garrett, yeah. Yeah, even more.

So I think there's a bit of blame on both sides. Yeah. Was he like, he never was like, damn, that was crazy. I mean, I think the whole world was kind of like, damn, that was crazy. But just random, you guys be out to dinner. He's like, remember that time? Miles Garrett almost fucking domed me.

No, he would not bring it up like that. All right. That's how our brains work. Something like that happens. That's all you talk about for the rest of your life. No, I think that's something you'd want to move past though. Yeah, probably. Because you're just labeled.

You're right. If it happens to you, then you want to move on from it. But us, we're dumb. Right. We see something on that rectangle that has lights that come out, the television, and that just gets sears into our brain

for the rest of our lives. And that's what we remember. Yes, but when it's you, you're like, I don't want to be known just for the one thing. Yes. You know? So you want to move past it. You also had a very funny Twitter story

that's actually becoming a movie now. So if I have it right, before the Patriots falcon Super Bowl, a fan on Twitter basically was like, if the Patriots win, you've got to take me out on a date. And then obviously, the famous comeback happens. And then you took, you're a woman of your word. You took him out on a date.

You guys hung out a little bit after too, right? Yes. And then it's now a movie? Yes. That's kind of crazy. You know everything about this story. I love it. Well, I was looking it up Nate in our office.

He chronicled it extensively. He was on top of it. He was on, I think that was his entire beat for a while was the Jeanne Bouchard Twitter date. Twitter fan date saga. Yes, yes. It was one of those crazy stories because it was just the timing of it all,

the timing of my tweet when it was the worst score ever. And then I was betting against Tom Brady and he was like, I'll take you on a date. Brady comes back and I was like, sure, because I thought that would never happen. And lo and behold, we have the greatest comeback in Super Bowl history. So just the timing of it all was outrageous.

And the next day, people were stopping me on the street, like, hey, are you that Twitter girl? And not like a tennis player, but like, no, you're that girl that I saw something on Twitter about. So John was just a very sweet guy. We actually went to a Brooklyn Nets game. We sat courtside and they showed us on the screen and everything was so cute.

And yeah, we stayed in touch ever since. We were like good friends. And now Fox 2000 bought like the rights to the story. Right. Then it got bought by Disney. So we're in the process of trying to attach an actress to my role and then selling it to probably one of the streaming platforms.

OK, so I want to ask about what actress you want to play you, but I have to just real quick. Do you know how close you were to like having to go on a date with just a complete like loser weirdo? Like Twitter is, we live on Twitter. So I could have been one of you guys. Oh, well, that hurts, but that's OK. No, that would have been fine.

No, that's fine. She's right. Yeah, she's right. But like, were you holding your breath like, oh god, this guy could be, like there are some trolls on Twitter. And if he shows up and he's just like, oh man, that was a mistake. Were you holding your breath?

Oh, I was completely terrified because his profile picture on Twitter was a picture of Tiger Woods. Oh, no. No, better than like a big fish or something. No, no, Tiger picture. The Tiger picture's definitely set to tone. This is obviously not Tiger Woods. So that means he's a super fan and we all

know how super fans can be. And so I was, I had Tiger Woods. So I had no idea what to expect. Literally, my bodyguard started doing like a background check and we finally got like a picture and like, I got a picture of his driver's license. And I was like, OK, he's just like a little college boy. He's a normal dude.

He's a totally normal dude. And people, like he's good looking. People looked at us and thought we would be such a cute couple. And so I was like, I think that's why people love the story so much as well because it looked like it could really happen. And who knows? Maybe it did. Maybe it didn't.

We don't know. Yeah. OK. Did you have any like security measures in place? Like, was somebody going to call you after the first quarter to just check and be like, are you OK? Was there a signal? Oh, yeah.

My bodyguard was like standing right over there. All right. Smart. But also it was in a very public place. So I felt safe. You know, this guy was going to pull anything in the middle of a basketball game. This might be the most shocking story of all time,

that you like took up a guy on Twitter and he wasn't a crazy. I know. It's just amazing how it turned out. I looked at the picture. I was like, that guy looks completely normal. One in a billion. We could actually date.

Like, I will actually consider this guy. Yeah. Sorry. So who do you want to play you in the movie? I dream. You get any actress in the world. I love like lively. OK.

Maybe Margot Robbie. OK. Those are good choices. Yeah. Yeah. Or I always get. I look like that girl from Gone Girl. People tell me.

Rosamund Pike. Yeah. I can see that. Yeah. But isn't that a fun game to play? Like everyone always plays that game. Like who do you want to play you in a movie? I know.

And this is like real life. No, you're just going to have to. Pinch me. It's going to happen. This is so cool. Yeah. Yeah. No.

You need to pick anyone. No, it's really cool. I'm executive producer and I want a little cameo in it as well. And I'm like, I want to be the crazy like ex-girlfriend in this guy's past that like comes back to like scream at him that he's trying to date someone famous or something. I feel like I could be a great psycho ex-girlfriend. That's kind of a psycho move to like want to play a girl

who's mad at a guy for wanting to date you. Yeah. I want to live out like my psycho girlfriend moment. Yeah. I really would. That's such a funny story. I really wish you had like gone on a date with like one of those guys that replies to every tweet like LeFraud James has never won a real title.

And he's got it typed out and he just replies to everyone all the time. He's like copy paste that. You know the people or crypto guy or someone. Do you know who's going to play the guy? No. So we're just trying to attach actors to this right now. And they've thrown around names like, gosh, who are they? Denzel Washington.

No. Okay. Will Smith. I just think, I mean, if you're in a couple, he's a little on the older side. Will Smith. True. He's available right now. He's got nothing going on right now.

He's been in a tennis movie before. That's true. Yeah. He's got. He won an Oscar for it. It was really good. That would be a cool, like melding of worlds that what's Richard. King Richard.

Yeah, Richard Williams. So it basically is like a sequel. It becomes almost like. Richard Williams then dates and then you go and beat Serena. And he's like, well, my wife and then my daughter are playing in Wimbledon final. It's like a cinematic universe. Yeah. Where he dates you, you eventually get married.

You have kids that then grow up to be probably the best tennis player of all time. Right? Yep. Yep. Because it's like half your genes, half the Williams family genes. And then your son or daughter becomes the goat. Yes. I'm going to go call Richard right now.

This sounds like a great life plan for me. Yes, that's perfect. It was interesting because I was watching King Richard the other day. And just thinking about like what you have to do as a child to put in work to become an elite tennis player. It's, it seems like so much work. It seems exhausting for like not just the player for the entire family. So like from, from what age did you really realize I want to focus on this and I want

to be great at tennis? You have to start really young. I started at four and a half years old. I've played my first tournament when I was eight. And I think I would say when I was probably nine, which I know is really young to decide your career in life is when I qualified for a big 12 and under tournament in France. So I got to travel internationally. And I was like, wow, I could travel and play tennis and this can be my career.

Like I'm doing this. And so pretty soon you have to specialize. I played other sports as a kid like soccer basketball, but by age 10 to 12, you're like, you know, leaving school early for practice and missing weeks and months of school at a time to go play tournaments around the world. Tennis is very international. So you sacrifice a lot. I missed birthday parties.

I missed family events. I missed socializing. Right. Was there ever a moment where you're like, I'm, this is not for me. Like that moment that happens in every movie where it's like, I don't think I want to do this anymore. For sure. Everyone had those moments when you lose a tough match.

You're like, is this really worth it and you feel bad about yourself? But for me, it was very soon to bounce back like the next day. I'm like, okay, like I'd feel weird not going to practice now. And I do still want to play tennis. And what's great with tennis is you have a tournament the next week. So you always have the ability to go play again next week. And, you know, I'm not playing a team sport. I'm not owned by a team where they tell me what to do.

I can decide my schedule. I can decide when I play. So it's like, hey, I want to go play extra tournaments. I can go do it. What's, what's the, I like to ask this of athletes, whenever we have an athlete on, like what's the one thing about tennis that the normal fan doesn't understand? Like whether it be something difficult that they can't really, they think we're the quintessential guys who sit on a couch and we're like, oh, we could do that.

We can't. But, you know, a lot of fans are like, oh, I could do that. What's the thing that fans completely overestimate in terms of skill or the game or thinking the game? You know, I find fans in New York specifically are like that because when I play at the U.S. Open and I go to the back of the court to get a ball, they're screaming at me like, hey, serve to her backhand. Like her backhand sucks. In New York specifically, they just love to be coaches.

And I'm like, how about you come try to, you know, you think it's so easy. So I feel that aspect. I think the biggest thing is the amount of hours that go into it. And I think tennis, honestly, I think we practice more than other sports. Like I have friends in every other sport and like we are on the court, three to four hours a day. And it's like other sports are they do an hour of really on field or on court. And then other stuff like gym, of course, and all that stuff working out.

But tennis is just the repetition. You really need good timing. And so it's just the hours that go in. And it's a full time job. I mean, I'm practicing three, four hours on the tennis court, two hours in the gym, two hour massage or physical therapy. Eating is part of my job, sleeping. And then that's my day.

How much time does it take for you to like lose your peak ability? Like is it a week? Is it because that's always amazing to me when we talk to athletes or like a hockey player is like, oh, if I don't if I'm not on the ice for two weeks, like I'm not. I'm like 80%. Oh, yeah. I mean, probably if I don't hit for one week, I'll go out in the court and feel a little bit out of it.

Really? Tennis is very much of the timing aspect to it. And you just got to get in a groove. And so that's why we practice so much. Yeah. Speaking of like big cat talking about fans having rational confidence and being able to coach you up on things. I had a thought before you came in that I wanted to get your feedback on.

If if you took everybody in this room. So me, big cat, Jake, Bubba, Billy and memes back there. If you had us all on the court against you at once. So it's like one against what is that six? Dude, could we take a game off you ever? Oh, no. You sure? No chance because she could just like, I don't think we could hit it back if she hit it as

hard as she wanted to. Like big cat said, we were just we just charged the fucking net. We put the pressure on you. Yeah, I guess that's why we probably put four four people at the net. So you'd have to figure out, would you just hit it at us directly at us and try to injure us? Probably at that point. I feel like, yeah, your your reflex wouldn't be fast enough to be able to handle that.

So I would just try to nail you guys. Yeah. I mean, I I was lucky enough. I think it was like seven years ago. We got to go hit with Andy Roddick and I couldn't even like get the racket up. Yeah. So more of you wouldn't really help. Yeah, probably be worse.

That's what I was going to say. You're going to get each other's way. It wouldn't even it would not be helpful to communicate well. Yeah. Who would you. So if it was like me, big cat Jake and Billy at the net, like just getting ready to return the volley, who are you going to try to hit first? Well, I think I'll go with you because you seem to have superior confidence.

Yeah. And so that's a red flag to me. Yeah. Go right at him. Yeah. Because he thinks he can do it. I think that means he really can. I know you're absolutely a hundred percent right.

Like you could not have read me more. The more I say that I believe that I can do something. It's usually because deep down, I know that I can't. Yes. And you have sunglasses on inside. Yeah. Well, the difference is blind people and assholes, right? He's 27.

So he's still got that like irrational confidence. I'm 37. So I've now reached the point of my life where I'm like, no, I would suck at everything. Yeah. You have that life experience and maturity. Right. Exactly. To know your limits. That's exactly.

All right. So when you're like, I've always heard this about tennis. You're thinking like two or three shots ahead while you're playing. Is that true? Pretty much. Yeah. I wouldn't say two or three. Maybe, I mean, one or two for sure. You're trying to hit somewhere, get them off the court.

Like I like to try hit an angle. And then I'm already thinking about, you know, moving them back to the other side or doing a drop shot after that. It's a little bit, people call it like chess a little bit in the sense of you want to, you want to set up the point. So you're thinking about where you want to serve and your next shot after for sure. Multiple shots ahead. So do you ever think about what they're trying to do to you and then you just do the opposite?

Like is it, and then they know that you're thinking about what they're doing. So they're going to do the opposite on that. You could really get yourself twisted. That was a convoluted question. No, you could really, you see what I'm saying though, if you know what I'm doing and I know that you know, I'm going to do something else. Now, do you know that I'm going to do something else, even though you already knew what I was doing in the first place?

I mean, I have to take a guess if you're going to be doing reverse psychology on me or not. But what if I'm reversing the reverse? So this is how you think yourself into like if you're a football coach, this is how you end up running a draw on third down at 12. This is me just standing on the tennis court, like my controllers unplug being like, okay, and not moving at all. Right, then you're like analysis paralysis and it's just frozen. So no, that's not helpful to think that way.

Good to know. I'm closer to being a pro. A little bit, let's simplify, you know, simplifying it, you know, thinking one thought at a time. What I would do though is you do need some humility to think about what they would do to you because you got to admit, what are my weaknesses? What are people going to try to attack? So you got to think about that and then find ways to counter it.

What are your weaknesses? I'm not telling you I don't have any. That's smart. That's smart. You almost had her. It's a good question though. Your serve's not great, isn't it? No, my serve's good.

Yeah. I don't think you charge the net enough, right? You're a ground stroke player. I am more of a baseline player and I do want to go to the net more. But again, you want to pick the right shot. So, but it's helpful to practice it and practice like we call it approaching to the net. And so you want to do that. So I need to practice that more.

I would see you falling into that trap of just trying to ground stroke us to death and I would just hit a drop shot. Yep. Checkmate. Okay. All day drop shots. Wow, you like know me. I'm scouted.

What about, have you ever whiffed on a slam? That would be so embarrassing. Like an easy one and you're just whiff. No. I do that all the time. Why am I not surprised? You get so hyped up, you're like, holy shit, I'm going to crush this ball.

Do you ever hit one in the net? Well, of course. That's embarrassing. Yeah, but see, you're already trying to think of winning the point. When in tennis, it's cliche, but you have to think one shot at a time. Yeah. Keep your head of yourself. Can't get emotional during the point.

You got to stay focused. Yeah. I've always wondered a lot of times when you go to the ball person, you get the balls that you're about to serve. They like, they bounce a couple of them, check a few and then they just like throw one away. They're like, not this one. What's that ball's deal? Because it has bad vibes.

Yeah. You can't play with a ball that has bad vibes. I like that. That's kind of what I figured. Because they're all the same. They're new balls that are used in championship level tennis. I would imagine there's some sort of quality control aspect where they're all good balls, but you see one and you're just like, no, not to that.

To be fair, there can be a difference. If you've randomly used one particular ball more than the others in this current set of balls, then it has less fuzz on it. And that means it goes faster through the year. So people will try to pick that ball for their serve. So it goes just that little bit amount faster. A little tiny fuzz. What about the member when Djokovic hit the, was it a ball woman?

Yes. In the throat? The Lyons person. Lyons person? So you thought she shouldn't have been standing there, right? What are you talking about? I mean, she shouldn't have been standing there. It was her job to stand there.

No, no, no. She shouldn't have been standing there. Because that's why they're getting rid of him. That was his fault. That wasn't his fault. They're trying to protect him. Yeah, they're trying to protect Djokovic. That was, no, that was wrong.

He should not have done that. For her, yeah. Yeah, that was a tough one to spin zone as a Djokovic fan. I was just like, well, see, this is the problem with fans. They're like blind. They just blind love for their person. And they just can't.

Big catch. If he, if he wasn't doing this job right now, he would be a guy at home with a Twitter avatar of Djokovic. Yeah. I'm sure he still has that. Yeah, this is Bernie. Oh, for sure. My favorite part about it.

I should probably have only watched one match of him ever. So what's the blind love for Djokovic? Again, it's just being part of the goat debate is very fun. Just getting in the mix. And it's also the one that makes the most people the most angry. Correct. Yeah, because he has a love hate with some fans. Like some people totally hate him.

So he's the perfect guy. Yeah, they hate because he's got a mind of his own. He speaks what he thinks. Exactly. Good for him. My favorite part about playing tennis, and I don't really play that much, like ever, really. But I always love the smell of the new balls.

Yeah. When you crack the top. Does that, does that joy ever go away? It never goes away. Yeah, that's amazing. And the sound that it makes too. The sound, yes. And at Wimbledon, because the courts are grass,

it's like a softer sound when it bounces. And it's just like, it's the most beautiful noise in the world. Wait, how many hits of the ball until the ball is like, can't be used anymore? Literally one point? No, no. We use the same balls for like seven games, and then they change them out.

Okay. Yeah. All right. Yeah, because then, but those balls, if you like grab that ball after it's dead. Not completely dead, but it's just not to our professional player standards. You guys could play with those balls, but we can't.

Oh, thank you. I appreciate it. What do you mean, like throw to our dogs? That would be perfect. No, for the one time, every three years you go on a court, you use it. Have you ever been in a warm-up? I love the warm-up, because you got to be nice.

Have you ever like played warm-up with anyone, and they were just like being a dick? Oh yeah, Sharapova. Really? Yeah. What'd she do? She just like tries to hit the ball as hard as she can in the warm-up.

That's hilarious. It's so annoying. That's kind of a mental edge though. Try and set a tone. She's trying to intimidate you, but it didn't work on me. So what did, can you like complain to anyone about that? Can you be like, hey, stop? No, the umpire can't force you to do anything.

Ultimately, the umpire can't force the person to warm up. Like, you could just walk on the court and decide not to warm up if you don't want to. But normally, most of us just do some easy rallying to feel good, and some try to do winners, and try to hit as hard as they can. Yeah, there's nothing that you just roll your eyes. It's like, oh god, here goes Maria again.

Yeah, she's in winners. This is where, yeah. Would you say that like, I mean, I detected a note of like, this is my rival when you brought up Sharapova. Is it fair to say that you and her have bad blood? Definitely, but she's retired now, so. You put her in retirement. You outlasted her, yeah.

Mm-hmm, congratulations. She doesn't want that smoke. I did that to Coach K. Yeah, it's a nice thing to do. Yeah, no. So unfortunately, we can't play anymore. I mean, she's a great competitor, and we had battles for sure.

But Noah, we can't play anymore. She's retired. What about, I've always wondered for strategy on a second serve. So you hit the first serve in the net, or it's out. And then you take a little something off the second serve. What if you just don't take anything off? Obviously, you have a better chance of giving up the point, but you kind of fuck up the opponent, right?

Totally. I sometimes think that's a great strategy, because they step in expecting an easier ball, and then you just go with another first serve, and they're surprised. But it's way higher risk. So you got to weigh the pros and the cons. It's all about risk reward.

I think I'm finding quickly that I would just probably not get a single serve in, and then I would go to the net right away and lose every point. Yeah, I'm getting a very kind of aggressive mentality here. So it's like, only first serves, rush the net. I don't know how far that'll take you. Can I tell you the truth? We're like, samples.

Yeah. I have played tennis before a few times, and it's just very boring to me. So I'm like, I'll hit it a couple of times, then I'll just try to hit a home run out of the whole thing. Yeah, that defeats the whole purpose of playing tennis. Yeah, right. I admit that it's stupid, but I just can't.

There's something about having a tennis racket and seeing the ball is just like, I want to hit a dinger. So you should maybe play baseball. Yeah, right. Exactly. If maybe tennis was more of like a mound and a wall that you had hit over, I would be more into it. And the racket was smaller and made out of wood.

Yeah. And no go strings on it. So basically, you hate tennis? No, I don't hate tennis. I love Jokovish. Yeah, I love to. I love, well, my favorite parts of tennis are the sound and the smell of the new balls,

the massages that you were talking about as part of the training. The goat debate. The goat debate, and then the giant tennis balls that they give you that you sign up. Oh, that the fans use? Yeah, I love the giant tennis balls. Those things are the best. They're so cute.

I love signing them. It's so much easier to sign the big ball than when they give you the actual balls because it's like a disaster. And also the fans, like, has there ever been a fan that like screwed you up? Because I know you're not supposed to yell during the point, right?

During the point you're not supposed to. Yeah, it happens sometimes, especially if a ball is close to being out. Sometimes fans will call it out, and then the player will stop because they think the umpire called it out. And then you have to replay the point and it's a whole situation.

But I wish the fans, I wish it was more like involved because it's quite quiet sometimes and stiff, and I feel like tennis needs to get with the times and be a little more fun. So I'm totally four fans. I always tell my fans, I'm like, scream as loud as you can. I think it's so fun.

Your fans are called Genie's Army? Yeah, they've labeled themselves the Genie Army. We're in. We're in. Are you part of the crew now? Oh, yeah. Absolutely. Why don't they the Boo Crew?

That sounds weird. I think it sounds great, or Bhutan Clan. Taking no ideas from you. Genie's Army, I'm part of it. But you got to like tattoo my name somewhere on your body. Oh, okay. We'll go right next to my Jokovic tattoo.

You know what you should do? The tennis, well, not you, like tennis as a governing body should kind of take a page out of golf's handbook where just have a tournament in Scottsdale, Arizona once a year where the fans can get as drunk as they want. They can scream during points, just like free for all, just absolute chaos. I think that'd be fun to do like one time.

I totally agree. And as long as the players can just get used to it, I think it'd be way more fun for people to be more engaged and more into it. I mean, the fans are great in tennis, but they're just, they're a little restricted. So I just want to loosen that up and make it more of a party scene.

Like when you go to basketball game, I went two nights ago and it was like a club, like you're sitting, the music is so loud and it's fun. Yeah, I like that. We've been pretty nice in this interview, but I do have, I've got one major issue that I think you're complete and total psycho about. And it's an old tweet that you had.

You said, I'm going to quote this, Dipping pizza in soy sauce is life. Oh no. All caps on life. Oh no, Jeannie. Dipping pizza in soy sauce is life. That's, that's a serial killer move. Oh no.

You know what? You can't, I'm not helping you on this one. I got so much hate for that. I had no idea that there was going to be this huge backlash. I mean, people got mad at me, but then soy sauce companies were like reaching out and like, hey, you want some free soy sauce? I was like, yes.

But it just adds some saltiness to it. I thought it was a great idea. Yeah. No, that's gross. That's too much. That's gross. I can't believe people feel so passionately about this. It's not passion.

It's more like, what's your problem? Yeah, I feel bad for you. Yeah. I just happened to be having sushi and pizza at the same time one night and I just dipped it in. Did it together. And now it's life. Yeah.

And now people know I'm a serial killer. All right. So if we're doing the mean question portion, I'll do my one mean question. I'm ready. You're a twin. Yes. How much does your twin suck at tennis?

I mean, right? That's a real question though, right? Like, what's her problem? Look, she started when I started at age four or five. And she retired at age six. Right. OK, so yeah, exactly. Is she ever like, I should have kept with that?

Sometimes, but you know, she, we're so different. She's like a social butterfly. She's great at other things. Definitely was not into sports like I was. I was more the tomboy kind of obsessed with sports. So interesting how twins can be so different. Yeah, I just always fascinating when twins, when one's like professional athlete and the other's not.

So if I had a twin and he was a professional athlete, I'd be like, I fucked that up. Like I got everything you got. Well, maybe. Maybe you got some different genes. Who knows? Isn't it the same? I think.

Is it identical twins? Yeah. No, we're fraternal. Oh, OK. All right. So there it is. Yeah, all right. You just beat her into submission.

Yeah. You share a poviter. Huh? You made her bow out. Yeah. You dominated her in your mom's bill. Yeah, in the womb. Just bullied her.

Just took no strokes off in the warm-ups. You were like, it's on once we get out of here. Yes, yes. I'd prefer not to think of it that way. But you know, no, I just, we're just so different people. We're basically, yeah, it's like siblings that just happen to be born at the same time. Got it.

Got it. I just want to play just real briefly, real quick game of matchmaker. You might not be into this at all, but I want to throw it out there because you have gone on a date with a fan before. Yes. And there's a person who works here at Barstool

that is a massive fan of yours. In fact, when you first started dating Mason Rudolph, this person wrote a blog. His name's Hubs. He said, devastating news, as Jeanne Bouchard is reportedly off the market. And then he just led the, he led the blog off with no and 17 O's. And then nine exclamation points after.

He was, he was devastated. That sounds like someone who's really devastated. Very devastated. Would you be willing to meet him at any point? Are you completely, you had one good date with a fan, so you're like, you know what? I'm not going to try it again. Well, first of all, with John, it was multiple dates.

Good job, John. And you know what? I am very single and very ready to mingle. So yes, let's meet Hubs. Okay. I think Hubs might have a girlfriend, but we'll. Not for long. We'll pretend.

Yeah, there you go. He's a massive Roger Federer fan too. You guys have a lot in common. Yeah, he is a huge, obnoxiously so Federer fan. Like he thinks he has the class that Roger Federer has. That's great. I would love a classy guy. He does not.

He does not. He's not a classy guy. He's a Yankee fan. Although he does, he has earned his pinstripes. Um, this has been awesome. I had one last question. It's the rowback question. Promo code take, you get 20% off your rowback purchase

with promo code take R-H-O-B-A-C-K dot com. We actually have some rowback gear for you and your mom. If you want, no pressure. I'm actually going to give my rowback question to Jake, who's sitting next to you, who actually is a huge, huge tennis fan. So he tries to get us to talk about tennis, and we just basically are like, shut up, dude. So now he can talk about tennis.

Yes. Hello, Jeannie. Hi. Three-time junior club champion here in Florida. Oh, what's up, Jay? I got a little something. A little more on my resume. One club.

Weston Hill is in Florida, Florida. That's what happened the last time we played, if you had to retire due to injury. I hit a slam winner at the net and I sprained my ankle, but I still won the point. Retire due to injury. That's pretty epic. Sportacard says retired could not finish.

He's also sick of ping pong. That does not translate at all to tennis. Well, he's also sick of tennis, so maybe it does. I respect it. Maybe a little bit. So we were talking about the goat earlier, right? You've played Serena Williams a handful of times in your career, and you beat her once.

Yes. When you see her on the other side of the net, people say it's cliche, oh, it's just another match. There's no way people actually think that. Is that what you thought when you played her? Because I have to imagine it's just, oh my god, holy crap, that's Serena. Great question. I mean, to be honest, for sure, the first time, especially,

when I played her, I looked across the net, and I felt like I was looking at my TV screen because I'm so used to seeing her on TV, and I was like, wow, I mean, it's an amazing feeling to be able to get to that place and achieve that, to be able to play against her. And so it's just kind of one of those like, out of your body experiences,

because you're just so used to seeing her on TV, and now she's actually in front of you waiting for you to serve. And it's like, I wasn't even thinking about winning at that point. I was like, I just want to do a good enough serve that she's okay to return, you know what I mean? Yeah, she beat her 6-2-6-1. Whoa! Did she give up a little bit?

No. Because that happens in tennis, doesn't it? We're emotional. But in certain, is there not a strategy? Like, I'll see, and again, I'm very, very, not a lot of knowledge about tennis, but I've heard people say that in a certain, no, game set, set.

Well, the whole thing would be a match. This match, set. If like, someone goes down, they'll just be like, all right, I'm punting on this. Maybe it's more men's game, men's because it's five games. In the so, in one set that they would try to, I think that can be a strategy.

They want to save their energy and almost just start over in the next set. Right. I would, I never do that though. I don't think that's right. That's what I say whenever Jokovic loses a set. That that's what he did? Yeah.

Okay, you're one of those like, real dire things. Yeah, I seriously have watched him one time. It was against. It was the 2019 Wimbledon final against Federer, I'm pretty sure. And who won? I think Joker. Fuck yeah.

That was an epic match, right? Yeah, that was the crazy thing. Yeah, that's what I watched. Yes. Do you have any other questions, Jake? That was a great question. Well, you know, the first time I ever played Serena though, I do remember calling my mom before and just saying like,

I'm so scared I'm about to lose six love, six love. And then I went out there and I won the first set, and then I lost. That was another match. What was the handshake like? Oh, great question. Great. She's gracious.

Yeah. But handshakes are a big thing in tennis. Are they? Has there been bad ones? What was it? What was your provis handshake like? Probably just grab the hell out of your hand, try to break it because she was so mad that you beat her again.

It was kind of, yeah, very icy, silent from both ends. Stare. Dead fish. You got into dead fish. Yeah, sometimes some girls are just almost like, barely tap your hand and then just walk away. I need you on howards. Anyone try to get physical?

Smush your face? No, no, tennis is a classy sport. Yeah. But there's some, you can tell the personalities and the emotions by how the handshake goes at the end. So always keep your eyes open for that. I love that. I mean, are you happy that there is the handshake?

Because my take is it does seem antiquated at times, especially in professional sports, like why are they shaking hands? But I love watching that interaction after a game. Oh, I love it too. I think it's great for the fans. And I think it's right to just, you know, have some sort of acknowledgement before you leave the court

after battling it out. So oftentimes they're great. I love when you see like two, after an epic match and the two guys hug and you're just like, yeah, they respect each other. Yeah. All right, go ahead. One last, last question.

My last question, because I did just watch King Richard. Have you ever done the thing that Sanchez-Vicario did and just pretend that you have to go to the bathroom just to stall somebody for a while? No, but players do it all the time. I won't admit to it, though. Yeah, the way you answered that, it sounded like a maybe. Maybe.

It's a maybe. Yeah. You'll never know. No, I mean, honestly, sometimes it's just for like, to take time for myself to like, take a couple minutes to go to the bathroom. But there are players who pretend they're injured to take time away and they play

all these kinds of games. I try to not do that, but. Yeah. All right, so my last, last question. This has been great. We've, as far as like first tennis guests, couldn't gone better. Now you guys have so much more information on tennis. I know, really enjoyed having you.

Thank you. Because we like to ask dumb questions because we're dumb guys when it comes to sports we don't watch and sports we watch. Let's just say you win Wimbledon. Are you a full collapse or go to your knees kind of celebrator? Oh, full collapse. Full collapse.

Yeah, because that's just a life-changing moment. So back or forward? Back. Okay, gotta go back. All right, all right. Because that's like, that's a huge decision. You have to think about that ahead of time. Yeah, you do.

Like the, I kind of think I'd be the knees like, that guy? Yeah, you do seem like that type. Yeah, like, are you not entertained? But I, listen, going all the way, you know, doing the snow angels is a pretty classy move too. Yeah, I would do that and just be like, what is happening?

I did it. What is life? Yeah, I would, I would absolutely go to the back in France at Roland Garrus because you get the clay on your shirt. Like Rafa, your favorite? Yes, no, Rafa's not my favorite. And now this is great because if you do win Wimbledon,

we are part of Genie's Army, so we're rooting for you. You will collapse, full collapse, and then you'll be thinking in the back of your head, remember when those two weird dudes sitting next to a bench press asked me what I would do if I won Wimbledon? So we will actually be the first thought in your head if you win Wimbledon. Yes, and I'll like thank you guys for helping me

plan my celebratory reaction. Mental coaches. Maybe do a barrel roll. That would be kind of cool. You go down and then you just start rolling around the court back and forth. Yeah, and I'll be, I'll be thanking you guys in my speech as well.

Okay, the French part or the English part? The English part. Well, it's Wimbledon. She's winning Wimbledon. Yeah, but you speak French too, right? I always assumed that if you speak French, you have to address the crowd in French. If I win France, for sure.

Not in England. I would stick with English. I would want the Queen to understand. Yes, yes. I also think this is actually what some college football coaches do. You get on the grass. You take a little bit.

You like push off like two, three blades. You eat it. Chocovish does that. Yes, Chocovish does do that. He does that at that point. He's a football guy. Yeah. I mean, it's grass.

It's healthy, so. Yeah, why not? Sure. Maybe a little soy sauce. Maybe you have a little soy sauce packet in your sock. I'm telling you, try it. I know. I'm not, I'm never going to try it.

And I like Skyline Chili. So I'm not a guy that's afraid to try gross shit. Yeah. Soy sauce on pizza, bridge too far. I just didn't realize I hit a nerve with that tweet. Yeah, well, we'll stop. We're going to try tennis again. We're going to try watching tennis again.

Let's do that first. I mean, I would expect you would watch me after this interview. When's your next match? Well, hopefully the French open. So, and then after that, Wimbledon. Don, so is your arm, would you say it's like 90%, 95%? Yeah, probably around there. I just need a little bit more time to do more rehab.

Very boring, fun exercises to get stronger and a little more time on the court to be ready to play. We're in. Actually, the more I talk about it, I do have another question. So when you're measuring. I'm here all day guys. Because I'm always curious about the serves.

They always have the miles per hour kilometers per hour. The radar gun set up for the serves. How closely do you pay attention to that? And like, do you adjust how hard you're hitting the ball if you're like, oh, that's three miles per hour less than what I know I can do? I actually look at it a lot. I probably look at it too much.

My coach would probably tell me, don't like look after every single serve. I look after every single serve. I just have to know. I love numbers. So I'm just like, I need to know exactly how much that was. And sometimes when you're in different conditions, it can, I can feel like I hit it harder,

but it actually came out slower because the air is like thicker or we're in a humid area, like in Miami or something. And then you go to Indian Wells and Palm Springs and it's the ball actually goes faster through the year. So, yeah, I would totally. And I would just try hit, you know, as hard as I could every time.

I love it. All right. We're Genie's army. We're excited for your comeback. This has been a lot of fun. We appreciate it. Thank you. I had so much fun as well.

Yeah. Sorry for some of the dumb questions. They were mostly not dumb. There were some dumb ones, but mostly not. What was the worst question that you were asking? Was it the twin one? Was it the twin question? That was just me.

That was just me. It felt mean. I said it was going to be mean before I said it though. So it was like a no offense, but yeah. Yeah. No, I don't know. I mean, the cleats were a little bit out there. The belief in charging the net no matter what.

Got to always be charging. That's what they say. ABC. I like the aggressive mentality. Maybe I'll do it more when I play as well. I love it. Yeah. Just have that as like a mindset.

And then you can always throw it away at the last minute. But you'll be more pumped up going into the match. Like I'm going to be aggressive. And then my coach is going to be like, what are you doing? And I'm like, yeah, I learned this tennis thing from these two guys. You never watched tennis? That know nothing about tennis.

Yeah. All right. Thank you so much, Jeannie. Appreciate it. Thank you for having me. I love you guys. Oh, I love you too. Bonchamps.

You'll say we should take a field trip in August for the US Open. Yeah. Share your own. Pass. Yeah. Come watch me. The US Open.

I'll be there. I'll be there. I'll be there. On average, people save up to $720 a year with TrueBill. It's a new app. It helps you identify and stop paying for subscriptions that you don't need, want, or the ones that you simply forgot about.

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Start canceling them today at TrueBill.com slash take. That's TrueBill.com slash take. Save thousands a year. TrueBill.com slash take. OK, we now welcome on very special guests. It is the first ever guys on guys. And it is with our colleagues, Joey and Pat. If you haven't listened out and about their podcast.

Is fantastic. Mostly sports centric. Correct. But these guys are the best. They're very, very funny. They are, I would say, at this point, this office is pretty much dead. But when you guys are in the office, you can feel it.

So that's a compliment. Thank you. And I know you want, we had some listener questions. But I know you, Pat, brought a gift for Billy. Well, I know we sit with Billy. We share a desk. And Billy, by the way, said so. He's nervous.

Look at his face. He's nervous. So a lot of times when someone will either be racist or have a slur, they'll be like, oh, I have a black friend or I have a gay friend. Billy actually said, I sit next to two gay guys. So he definitely says that. That you're out.

On the weekends, he's like, oh, I can't be racist for using. I can't be homophobic for using this slur. I sit next to two gay guys. Now, also, Billy said that he was a little bit concerned because he's fine with all the jokes at his expense and all the flirtation that goes on. There's a lot of it. Well, it's two ways.

Don't get it twisted. It's two ways. And he actually initiates it most of the time. I'm sure he does. He's like a little minx. He bats his eyes at a lot of people. But he said he's fine with that off the air, but he doesn't want any of that in actual content, which

is completely backwards than the way that it should be. Well, he's a closet queen. OK? Oh. That's what we call a closet queen. She does the things behind closed doors. But not in the open public. Now, I see him in the men's room doing this quite a bit.

Tapping on me. Put his hand underneath the old Larry Craig. That's actually my first question. Is that a thing? People forget that senator. He was up in like Montana in an airport. And he stuck his foot underneath the stall and tapped his foot to try to get laid.

And then he was like, no, I just have a wide stance. Well, his technique was off. Yeah. You're going to want to wear a Chelsea boot. Or a winged Timberland. You're going to need a Chelsea boot, perhaps a wing tip. Yeah. Maybe a triple reinforced heel.

And you're going to point. Has that ever happened? Yes. And have you ever been like? Not for me, for him it has. Have you ever been, Joey, have you ever been like, oh, that's gross. The guy's wearing like adidas.

Well, no, I peek through the crack like a lady. OK. Let's see what I'm got myself into. A lot of times, I'm not just in the men's room. One thing I hate about that is I hate having to get on your knees and not being on my knees. I'm not a problem with that. Now, I'm a taker.

OK? It's when you have to stick your dick under the stall. I just like to go, you've done that? No, I hate that one. You've only serviced. You've never done the sucking. I can't get that far down. But you've done the servicing.

You haven't been serviced in the hole. I've done both. I'm just curious how the physics of that work. You just lay on the ground? If there's a glory hole, then you stick your dick in the hole. But if there's not, you have to go under the stall. So it's like squat and spread. Gross, not the sex part, but the floor part.

Not the sex part. Yeah, no, not the sex part. Oh, we're sex positive. Yeah, if there's a hole there, go for it. I'm just not going to touch the back of the floor. I prefer just to go into the same. So I know it says one at a time. But I'm a rule breaker.

I like to live on the edge. So I like to go into the stall with them so I can really do my magic. OK, nice. So Pat, what did you bring for Billy who, again, he sits next to two gay guys. So if you think he's homophobic, think again. Yeah.

Well, Billy is always so, like you said, flirtatious with Joey. And he's always getting bricked up at the desk. He's very high T. So we got him a little something to help take the edge off when he needs it. This is an Arcwave air masturbator, Bill. And what you do is you stick your cock in here and it'll suck it for you.

It sounds like a muffler. It sounds like a 1994 Honda Civic when you started up. And if you need something for the spank bank, here's a photo of Joey at the tunnel in 1999, I believe. Yes. So Billy, this is for you. Right for the turn of the century. Wow.

That's a glamorous looking masturbator. It's like $200. It looks like something you'd find in, I don't know, like a nice store, like a Sears or a Brookstone. A sharper image in the mall. Yeah. Joey, that's 1999. Where is that?

At the tunnel. That's in the upstairs bathroom. Ladies' room, to be honest. And where's the tunnel? It was on 28th Street. And 12th, right? And 12th Avenue. Billy just, by the way, opened it up

and gave a good look at the masturbators. Turn it off. Yeah, you got to turn it on. Who turned on this? It's quite the piece of hardware. It looks like a science project. He'll be using that. Now, that's the charger.

You know what's good about that is I have it in my desk. My cleaning ladies don't know if it's a speaker or what it is. Now, they always find my sex toys. Wait, is this new or used? No. You have to find out. We haven't opened it yet.

Just ignore the liquid. Now, you want to hold? You want to hold? Can I show what you're building? Because my confusion was, when I climaxed in here, there's a cup, a reservoir, if you will. And I didn't know how to open it. Wait, when you said in here?

Not in this one, in a different one. No. In the studio? Although the seal was twisted. And that's where all the nut goes. Got it. Oh, I didn't even know that came on. Now, this is dishwasher safe, OK?

And you can feel that that's the thing that's going to make your ruffle sound. And now it's like in here. All right, hold on. Ready? Yeah. These be charged? It's on the back.

No. It's on the back, I think. Really, sex toys like this should come, like, two-thirds charged. No, they are charged. I remember I had trouble this last time. One, two, three. Well, maybe it's this one.

Still got Bluetooth? Yeah. I can control this from my desk. Hell yes. Come on. Talk about something else. I'll try to start it up. All right, let's do questions.

We have Billy's. So we usually do guys on chicks where we give advice to women about how to deal with their boyfriends and different women's needs. This will be the first-ever guys on guys where we have guys asking questions and we give advice to them. I love it.

Yeah. All right. Oh, sorry. I forgot one thing. Billy also threw in two questions of his own. You'll have to guess which they are at the end. Easy. At the end.

Easy work. Yeah. You'll be able to tell. He asked that. He won't stop asking questions at the desk. He's not a charge. He's a very curious guy. He goes, hey, when one guy's taller than the other.

I'm like, make sure the charge is on. And then we can go up. I'll do an instructional video in the men's room with you. Perfect. Now, I'll grab it. Now, we'll grab it by the base. Hello, big coach killer. Undefeated in the game of the year's cat,

the team formerly known as the Washington PFT. Please don't send me a selfie suit. Honk, Billy, my hands are no longer weapons football. And of course, our golden goose boy, Jake. I love my girlfriend very much. Our sex life is fantastic. But she isn't the best at BJs. And she loves to give them.

How do I tell her to hone her skills without sounding like a douche? Love the show. And I think of myself as a man of faith. And there's a drive into deep left field. So good question. He's looking for tips on blowjobs. So that instructional video. Is there?

Well, I don't know if he is necessarily looking for tips on blowjobs. He's looking for tips as to, like, what's the best way to make her want to get better? Because it sounds like she likes doing it. Well, I think, I mean, communication is the first. Maybe you pop on a porno. You know, maybe you slide into coffee.

Copy what she's doing. Do what she's doing. You should have a gay guy over to teach her. Is that the answer? Slide into your guy's DS. Someone actually did just slide into my DS. I'm asking us for that. Who?

Advice. Probably the same person. Someone's asking for blowjob advice from us. We can't. Yeah, I don't know. I would tell her, I love the enthusiasm. Great enthusiasm on the field. But we want to do some practice moves.

You can do a lot with enthusiasm. Yeah. But you just got to hone the skills. If the enthusiasm is there, that's half the battle. That is. Like 90% of girls and guys don't want to give the blowjob. If they want to give the blowjob, give the blowjob. You just got to coach them through it.

Or just have her teeth removed. Or just have her teeth removed. I don't want to get this confused. Joey's not saying knock out all her teeth. Surgically removed. Yeah. By a medical professional. Yes.

Well, that could be a fetish as well. Munchausen's teeth down her throat. And then, let's go fuck her. Let's go fuck her. Munchausen's by proxy, if you will. Yes. You just trick her into thinking she has bad teeth. You say, God, you really should get her teeth fixed.

And then you pull the teeth out. And then, you know, you just never put them back in. Do you think you just start feeding her more foods in cone form? Just like, if you're making dinner, just make sure you have it. Sally, yeah. Everything is. Everything's like throwing her on a stick.

And then she gets crept. She gets the reps in, yeah. Or just show her slowly. Yeah, give her banana. And like, every time that she bites, just be like, ow. You know how you do that with her dog? With your dog? Like, you have to like fake, like you got bit by your dog

if he gets nippy. Wait, what if the guy, what if this guy, why don't you get a dildo? That's my advice. Why don't you get a dildo and suck the dildo the way you want to be sucked in front of her. And not your wife videotaped it. But then also videotape it and then send it to us

and we won't share it with anyone. I can guarantee you will leave an impression. Yeah. Like, she will remember that. Yeah. Yeah. This is how it works. It's very romantic.

He's all, he's like. Now you're going to want to, you're going to want to lift it up and get rad on that, that frenulum. Maybe you can put your name on the cock on the dildo just so it's very clear. Have we considered the fact that maybe this guy, maybe she's not bad at giving head. Maybe this guy's bad at getting head.

Oh, yeah. Maybe he's got bad head getting technique. Well, now we're victim shaming. Yeah. And that's not really something we'd like to get into. Yeah. All right, Bill, good first question. Next question.

What do gay dudes think of tits? Oh, this is Billy's question. This is Billy's, this is the most Billy question I've ever heard. Oh, great question, Billy. What do gay guys think of tits? Well, we have a pair of G's at our desk. I had mine removed. He had hers removed.

I used to have big man tits and I had them removed. But I think, oh man, I love, I think I'm fascinated by breasts. I love them. I just think the word boobs is funny. Like there's so many funny names for boobs. But I enjoy a pair of titties. I think there's nothing funnier than just a massively large set of tits. I wouldn't want to touch them.

No, it is funny, yeah. When you're sucking on their titties, have you ever had milk come out of a tit? Never had that. Just tried it straight from the tap? Have you? No. You have a kid?

No, I do. I have two children. Because you never took it from the tap? No, never took it from the tap. Willie Cologne did that. Of course he did. Yeah, he's like, he goes, I lean over, I go, baby, I'm thirsty. And he sucked it right out.

But I guess a lot of times you have to like unclog the tit. The father does. Yeah, it's a duct. So you got to get a real sucker on there. I still, my friend used to squirt. Willie didn't think the question was going this way, by the way. My friend used to squirt her breast milk like this across the room. Woo.

So it's a party trick. So Billy's real question is like, you never see tits and they're like, damn, that's hot? Never. They kind of gross me out. Big udders. Get out of here. OK.

All right, so good question, Billy. Billy's next question is, are you sure? I like them for, are you? Question two. Really? Yeah, and then question three is going to be like, what about a pussy? What if they're like real hot tits? OK.

Next question. I would love to hear Joey tell us what someone looks and sounds like when they're dad presenting. Oh, what is this? Wait a second. They want me to just straight voice. I think this is what it is. So OK.

So you want to clarify what dad presenting is? Let me just talk about what presenting is first. OK, yeah. So like, you're like straight bro presenting. Mask, daddy presenting. What you appear as? What you appear as. You're like chill vibe, like stoner presenting.

Not a drug guy, though. Not a drug guy. Billy is bro presenting, frat bro presenting. And on our show, we always talk about what we're presenting as for the day. And then he does straight presenting. He does a straight voice. So I think, is that what they want you to do? I'm confused.

Yeah, I think so. And dad presenting would be like a probably maybe a gay guy that looks like he's a father. Right. Well, there's dad bods. Go ahead, let the voice wrap. Talk about the game last night. Hey, you catch a game last night, bro?

Uh, it's pretty good. OK, good start. OK, it's all right. We're not live, right? Yeah, good start. Had to get to character. What can I give you a conversation? You see fucking Kyrie last night?

Yeah. Tell him that's the crowd. Oh man, I fucking saw that shit. I don't know. The fair thing about Kyrie is it's like the dude's fucking wack as hell. And then he just fucking gets in the game and starts throwing the ball down the wrong side of the core.

I'm like, dude, what the fuck, man? All right. Yeah, you crushed that. And scene. These are available at the store. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. So you guys got your merch.

Also listen to Out and About. Pat actually came visit the beach house last summer. I did. And the guy that was renting it out to us turned out to be an Out and About listener. So he called me the next day and he was like, hey, heard somebody talking about my house on one of the podcasts. I was like, oh fuck, what did he say?

Oh. But you guys were actually very complimentary. I think Fights was just talking up his interior design game. Yeah, it was a beautiful house. It's too bad he didn't do it earlier. They could have saved you 5,000 bucks or whatever it was. It's free ice cream. Billy, free ice cream, free ice cream.

What you are we going to say to Billy? I'm just having a side conversation. Oh. Yeah, I'm about merch to the MAM sweatshirt, which I ruined during the case race. I'll give you another one. I saw it in the trash. I go, who threw this out?

And I think it was covered in paint. Yeah, paint and whatever. Sweat, grossness. All right. Next one. What's up, Dadcat, Ghost to PFT, Poppy Pat and Big J Joey. Why do my bros not want me to want them to fuck? I'm sorry.

Wait, what? Why do my bros, no, no, I'm reading exactly what he said. Why do my bros not want me to want them to fuck? They bonk me when I try to encourage them to hit up chicks or when I ask if their night was successful. Can a dude not enjoy knowing his bros are bricked up? I am happily married, so I will admit I try to live vicariously through their single lives.

He wants to suck the ball. But they're not. He wants to, he wants to. I was going through this exact thought process in about the eighth grade. OK. But they are very weirded out by it. Thanks, honk.

I hope Jake didn't cringe when he tried to pronounce vicariously. I love this guy. I mean, he's just a horny. He's cock hungry, is what it sounds like. He's married. And they always say, he's prefaced that, oh, I'm married. So it's like, we get more fucking questions. Everyone says, every guy, straight guy listens.

He goes, just so I'm straight and I'm married. But I find you are so funny. I just want to let you know. I listen to the weirdest fucking thing. But I listen. This is what's going on here. He is not living vicariously. He is cock hungry.

And he. It's very simple. He can't joke. He doesn't want to do it to his wife. And he didn't explore it to later in life. He wasn't ready to explore it to later in life. And now it's too late for him. Because he doesn't want you to know his wife.

I would just tell your wife, you need to get a cock in you for like, maybe one day, just get out of your system and then go back to your wife. He needs to get fucked. That's what he's got to do. Just rip the band in. I do like him say, I'm married, but it's like you're talking to your lawyer and nothing

that you can say after that is inadmissible in court. I'm married, but every once in a while, I go right to that LaGuardia airport. And I tap my foot. There's also, I don't know, he sounds like, to me, maybe the friend who got married first. Because that is a creepy thing to walk around to your buddies being like, yo, did you fuck last night?

Like being not serious about it. Where'd you shoot? Yeah. Yeah, you got two details. Do you have any left I can taste? You can root for them without having to ask them every time and having it being a little bit creepy. Right.

We asked Hank one time, and that was one time too many. What'd you ask? What'd you ask? Did you fuck? What did you fuck? What did he say? He wanted to de-hank with detail? He just looked at me and said, what?

Is that Hank behind the screen? No, Hank's your boss, Joey. He's upstairs. He wears a suit. He can fire you with the drop of a hat. I know. Who's behind the screen, then? That's memes.

Can I see his face? Oh. Smash your pass. Didn't he used to work in here, though, Hank? Yeah. Years ago. Yeah. Many moons ago.

You guys want to walk us real quick through like how you guys met each other and how Joey came on the podcast? We met through KFC, through Kevin. Yeah. I was bottoming for Kevin. And I was filming. And then next thing you know,

no, he was in for Answer the Internet with Snooki back in the day. And then I was doing my show when I first started it, and I thought about having Snooki on. And they said she's not available, but her best friend is available. And I go, oh, I go, I guess we can get him in. We'll see how this goes.

Yeah. And then he came in and we just instantly hit it off. And then he kept hosting and hosting and hosting. And then they ended up bringing him on full time. And that's pretty much it. That's it. What you guys kissed on stage, how'd that do for the podcast?

Should PFC and I kiss? I would love if you'd kiss right now. He's a good. I don't want to put the pressure on. No, we don't want to put the pressure on. We do that once a year. On January 30th, it's Big Cat's birthday. You do 36 kisses.

The 31st is my birthday. So it's like at midnight, it changes over from his birthday to my birthday. So we play Suck and Blow. We would need to do that. Suck and Blow? Have you played that before? No.

It's so much fun. But how did it go for the podcast? I'm not great. Now, were we talking for the mental health of us both? Yeah, mental health. Or the chemistry. It definitely helped. It definitely helped.

It put us on the map. They loved it so much that women in the crowd went nuts. We were like, oh, we'll like to. That guy was probably in the crowd watching. Yeah, the guy was probably jerking off in the crowd. They went so crazy when we kissed on there. It was like, well, because they know I haven't had sex in 20 years. We don't want to get into that.

You know he hasn't had sex since 2014. Really? Why? I'm emotionally damaged. And I can't trust a man. Got it. Billy, you know why? That was Billy's next question.

I would. You tried to woman? I want to. Would you bottom for a woman? No, I would want to stick it in her. He actually fingered his friend on the couch once. Her name is Jen. Just to see what it felt like, he did this at a Christmas party.

That was on my sectionals from Jennifer Convertibles. Yeah. And I kept giggling so she couldn't finish. I felt defeated. Joey, by the way, also has maybe the best bio on barstoolsports.com. Thank you. If you go to the blogger page, by the way, you're wearing an Iron Maiden cutoff shirt.

Yeah. That's just fashion right there. It says, hi, my name is Joey Kamasta. I'm a celebrity makeup artist, turn comedian. I'm the co-host of Out and About. And soon to be host of a top secret makeup project. I'm moonlight as an amateur chef. And my three favorite things are big dicks, fried chicken,

and impeccably chilled Sauvignon Blanc. That's great. True that. Preach. I love those things. Once I said we had fried chicken or a big dick. In what order? I had fried chicken last night and Sauvignon Blanc.

Now I'm just missing the dick, Billy. Oh, he's a witch. What's up, Out and About? Can two gay dudes put their dicks in each other's butts at the same time? Wait, what? That's called this, Billy. This is you.

No, it's not. Billy, this has. We go from boobs to this. This was next level. Billy wanted to go one level deeper with it. I'm puzzled right now. I'm like, are we talking about a classic DP? No.

No, like you guys. Why dick in your ass and your dick in my ass? At the same time. Oh, you could bend it, probably. Yeah, you have to have, I'd imagine that. Wait, let's get into a scissor. One person who's blessed needs to be involved in this, at least, right?

Who's big boned it. Yeah, because, I don't know, the anatomy. How would you do it physically? No, you can't do that. Unless you send your dick like all the way down, and then like you went in, you like almost like knife. What position would you be in? You'd be like sitting on each other.

Okay, I think I got it. It's one guy on his back, and then the other guy on top of him, reverse cowboy style. But his ass is on the floor then. Oh, yeah. No, but he's sitting butt on top of this, but then he's got to have like a big, long. He's got to have a big dick.

Yeah, he's got to have a boomerang. Like maybe eight even angles down. Yeah, it's back to back kind of. Yeah, it could happen. It could happen. I'm sure if you search Born Hub, it's on there. Cool. Yeah.

Billy's writing that down. He's adding us to his list of experts for this specific topic. How do you make new friends in your 30s? Thanks, PMT. Oh, this is a good guys on guys, yeah. That's a tough one, because I have been trying. Oh, God, friends in your 30s. If the obvious answer is people you work with,

that's like the easiest way to make friends. But a lot of people who they work with suck, and you don't want to be friends with them. Especially if you're in your 30s, it's that weird age where like the people above you are like, maybe they're upper management and they're 40s. Hank, maybe they're a suit, they're fast tracked like Hank. You got to be careful what you say.

You can never really open up with them. Right, or if they're younger like Gen Z, you can't relate there either. I think just go out to the bar and you make friends all the time. He'll go out and like, he'll party with people till 11 in the morning who he met the man before. Strangers. I think the best way to do it is a high noon happy hour

around America for Bar Silver Summer. Oh, yeah, or that. But yeah, so, Joe, you're a social butterfly. Yeah. How do you, how is it? Well, it's drug induced. Okay. Yeah, that's.

So, there's your answer folks. Are those like, are those friends that you make? Are those like people that you have an awesome night with? Well, the both. Is there a difference? Oh, no, it's more awesome. I never hear them, see them from them again most of the time. Do I get so many text messages like, oh, like, hey, like midweek.

I don't know who the fuck this person is, but they're on my phone. So, I always had to take pictures of the person while I'm fucked up. So, I remember and put them in the phone. So, I remember who it is and how it correlation. 90% of the time I'm going out to people, someone is trying to blow straight guy. Facts. That's 90%.

90%, that's a very high percentage. And then, then whatever ensues after that initial like contact. So, either I'm like on my journey to like, I try to keep like with a straight guy keeping up with him, trying to keep and suck him off. And then, I run into friends with his and the girlfriends of his and then it trickles out from there. And the girlfriends know him and then they're like, oh my God,

we're such a big family. It always starts with me trying to sneakie. Trying to blow straight guy. You do sound like a salesperson almost. You're even like reaching out to bed and like touching him because you like, you almost have to schedule your contacts just to like pop up again and be like, hey, it's me. And then you're moving them closer and closer to closing them.

That's like a done deal. Yeah. So, I mean, so just to put a button on it, try and blow them. Try to blow them. Try to blow your friends. Try to blow some dudes and you'll meet a lot of new people. Yeah. What about a singles mixer?

I've heard like friends. Do they have those? Publicities show. Go to a comedy show by yourself. Comedy show. Go to a bar by yourself. No one does that. Go to the rambles.

It's all by yourself. I've got two suggestions and you guys can give me feedback on this. Is there a loop on this? Somebody hit me up and said a way to get around this loop or a way to get around the problem of not having any friends in your 30s is to buy a boat. I think that's actually a genius move. Now, every other part about buying a boat sucks, but it will get you friends.

Fake friends. Fake friends. But you don't need real friends. You just need fake friends. Yeah. Because at the end of the day, you don't want to open up that emotional damage. Yeah, that's right. Fake friends are actually the best friends.

Yeah, fake friends are way better than real friends. And eventually, fake friends, you just lie to each other long enough that you become real friends. Right. Yeah. Right. You don't want to let someone in. No.

That's the worst thing you can do. All right, Billy, why don't you choose two more? All right. Uh, what are poppers? Oh, do you want to go grab some from your handbag? I could go grab them, but it's like white out. That's not white out. It comes in like a white out thing.

It's you sniff it and it loosens up your asshole. It's the thing you might have seen like on the street on like a Sunday morning. You go for a walk, maybe take the dog outside. There's tiny little metal canisters that are laying down next to the curb. Those are whippets. Those are whippets. Oh, is that different than poppers? Yeah, no, poppers are.

It's a liquid. It's ammonium nitrate. That's what poppers are, right? It's a jar and you sniff it like this. And it's the funnest thing ever. You just laugh uncontrollably for like, the way it does it, it loosens up your blood vessels. So like the blood just rushes through your body.

So you have this orgasmic like rush through your whole body. That's very unhealthy. Oh, it's, it's, it's your sniffing pure chemicals. Yeah, that's good to say. It is not good for you at all. Like sniffing something to have it loosen up your blood vessels cannot be healthy. No. No.

And especially it comes with like a, like the, it looks like a Chernobyl sign on it, like radioactive, but you go into any gay club. People are sniffing this stuff. He only jerks off with poppers. I only do it every time I masturbate. Otherwise it won't work. Right now Billy's thinking of ways that this could be used for like working out.

It sounds like a vasco dilator. It basically gives you a hug, maybe. I'll give it to you at the desk. You can try and see what you think of it. Does it give you a boner? No, it doesn't give you a boner. But if you're jerking off and you're like, you sniff it, it's like, you just want, you can, it just makes you come.

Like you can't control it. It makes your face like hot and heavy, but it's not good for you. Does it, like, do you have a hangover from it? Is it like shit after it? No. It's like 30 seconds. No, it's like 30 seconds. So it's, it's like chemical cocaine. Yes, a little bit.

Yeah, but it's more euphoric than cocaine. Okay. It's like more like, like ecstasy, sniffable ecstasy. Got it. Is it like smelling salts? It's exactly like that, but it feels much better. It doesn't hurt. It doesn't hurt.

It makes your face, your face feels like a really, like a mercury balloon. Can you overdo something? That's not good. Can you what? No. You overdo something? Um, no.

I'm sure you could just pass out if you, if anything, but you're not, he had overdose on it. Well, I just, Joey's not a medical professional. I just want to throw that in. Oh, right, right. True that. Disclaimer. Like I did it in my whole-

A bunch of like 22 year old bros in college are just popping and all dying. But if you do want to get- Well, I listened to part of my tape. If you do want to get fucked in the ass, so it does help because it loosens like, it makes you very relaxed. Got it.

Okay. Last question. This has been fun. We'll have you guys back on for sure. Thank you. Depending on the, I think people will like this. I think people are going to like this. There'll be a few people who are like,

this was terrible and I'll be like, Oh, they're terrible. Yeah, they are. Yeah. Joey, give us one more sports take for in your dad presenting. Give me this topic. Uh, do, uh, fuck the-

The NFL draft's coming up. NFL draft coming up. Say the NFL, say I'm really looking for the NFL draft. It's going to be sick. I'm getting my script. Kenny Pickett and Malik Willis are two quarterbacks that are going to be great. Kenny Pickett.

Uh, make a decision on that. Are the Giants going to get a quarterback this year? Oh, I'm fucking hoping, man. We fucking finally get a quarterback on that fucking team. It's been years. I know, uh, what was the draft? Well, we're going to see what the- Kenny draft coming up.

Maybe we'll, maybe we'll get ourselves a fucking quarterback. It'll be nice, right? Kenny, guys. What's her name? Kenny Pickett. Kenny Pickett. Fuck Kenny Pickett, man. He's got tiny hands.

Smallest hands in the draft. He's a friend of the show. Wait, is that- Oh, we love him. We love him. Is it draft? No, the combine. That's where they all walk in their underwear

across the stage? Yeah. Oh, he's watched that before. That's the end of February. Oh, it happened already? Yeah. I would love to be a fly on the wall there. I said to him today, I go,

why don't we tell them we're going to talk about the Celtics Nets series? And he goes, is that a band? Bailey, did you ever- When you played football, did you ever have to do that walk across the stage in boxed griefs? No.

No. You're just saying- Do you want to do a reenactment today? That'd be funny. We can film that. No, it's cool. Joe, you don't watch any sports? I don't pat.

No, I watch baseball. I watch all the sports that are on. So, like, you know, my friends all watch sports. Collegiate wrestling. Got it. Oh, I love that. That's how I discover Gable Stevenson. Yeah.

Have you seen Pat on a basketball court? No. He's the best basketball player in the office. Oh, wow. I wear many different hats. No, I'm serious. Like, he's incredible basketball. Yeah.

I haven't heard- He looks like Larry Bird. That's what makes- That's an honor. That was just a white guy playing basketball. That was all- No, that was sport. You shouldn't have done that in straight voice.

I would have taken it away. He looks like Larry Bird. He looks like Rick Smiths. I like baseball, though, because you can see their faces. And football, they wear those silly hats. You can't see their faces. Well, baseball players are caked up. Yeah, they are.

They're underrated. You see the guy getting hit. He sent it to me before it went viral. It happened, and somehow it shows up in his algorithm on TikTok is disgusting. It showed up on his TikTok, and he sent it to me, like, as they were, like, getting ready for the next pitch. It was in my phone.

Amazing. Yeah, baseball players' asses are just- I feel like they've gotten bigger even though. Oh, you're damn right. Boys, I have a buddy that loves the key and peel slap-ass skit even to this day. At least a couple times a month will slap my ass as hard as you can in, say, the iconic phrase, slap-ass,

or the occasional good game. Am I a bad bro if I tell him he can't slap my ass? It's not just me. It's nearly our entire friend group. Thanks, bruised cheeks. Well, would you rather have him finger your ass? I'd have him slow down and incorporate a squeeze, first of all.

Yeah, maybe because it hurts. Probably because it hurts. A slap-ass is a very thin line between a slap-ass being gay and it being a sports tap. If you're going hard, it's a tap. But if you linger, which is what I tend to do, it can become sexual. If you cup, it can become sexual.

I think you've got to go, yeah, if it's a flat hand, that's an ass tap. What's the favorite sort of cup? Yeah, then it's- A cup with a wandering pinky? Yeah, you're trying to do something more. And guys, whenever guys touch each other, we also have to make sure that we're hurting them a little bit.

At the same time, just make sure that they know that we're being straight. We're like, hey, what's up, buddy? And just like, hit the fuck out of them. I heard that tap. Yeah, just hit them in the dick. I want to touch your dick, but I also want to hurt it. I did like the no-homo phrase is no longer PC,

but I always thought it was funny when the dude would be like, yeah, I love that guy, no-homo. It's like, you can just say you love him. Yeah, and then that evolved into pause. Yeah, pause. Pause is funny. Pause is the new, yeah, that is true. We should start saying pause around the office.

What does pause mean? Pause means no-homo. Yeah. Or it's like, if someone says something, it's like, well, pause. Like when Billy looks at you during the day with that lingering eye, you say pause. Like, will I tell Rico that I'll come in his hole? Yes.

Or people will be like, pause. Oh, I only know pause up from Lady Gaga. What's that? The Monstars. Pause up. Monstars. Yeah. What do you guys do with that bingo machine?

We do a lottery. You want to pick a number? Yes. Yes. Pick any number, one through 100. I want 38. Oh, OK. 24.

22. 8. Billy. 6 to 69. 3, 6, 4. Everyone just got to remember their own, because I never remember whose numbers or what. If you guys got this on the first try,

that means you actually get part of my take. Oh, OK. 54. Ooh, now I was 24. Very close. Teddy Bruceke. All right. Thank you, guys.

Joey, Pat, out and about. Go listen. Let's go. Guys on guys. Yeah, well, we'll definitely have you back on, and we appreciate you guys stopping by. Thanks, guys. Thank you for having us.

For an honor. And if Billy gives you any shit, just let us know. Yeah. Probably. All right. Now, Bill, that should be able to turn on by now. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.