Parenting Hell with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe - S02 EP20: A right kick in the Jaffa's...
Episode Date: March 30, 2021ROB BECKETT & JOSH WIDDICOMBE'S 'LOCKDOWN PARENTING HELL'S02 EP20: A right kick in the Jaffa's...More misadventures in parenting and beyond...Enjoy. Rate and Review. Thanks - Rob and Josh xxx If you... want to get in touch with the show here's how:EMAIL: Hello@lockdownparenting.co.ukTWITTER: @lockdownparent INSTAGRAM: @lockdown_parentingA 'Keep It Light Media' Production Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: hello@keepitlightmedia.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Hello, I'm Josh Riddickham. And I'm Robbeckin. Welcome to Lockdown Parenting Hell.
The show in which Rob and I discuss what it's like to be a parent during lockdown, which I would say can be a little tricky. And to make a little tricky.
So in an effort to make some kind of sense of the current situation,
and to make me feel better about my increasingly terrible parenting skills.
Each episode will be chatting to a famous parent about how well they're coping.
Or hopefully not. And we will be hearing from you the listener with your tales of lockdown
parenting woe. Because let's be honest, none of us know what we're doing.
Hello and you are listening to lockdown parent in hell with. Is he Josh?
Is it Josh See Josh
Josh Beckett
Not Josh Beckett
You see Josh
Widdickum
And Rob Beckett
Beckett
That's one of my favorites that was very cute so quiet. It's like a little borrower. Yeah,
borrower voice and Can I ask a question Josh little borrower. Yeah, borrower voice.
And can I ask a question, Josh?
Is borrower too old as a reference point now?
There's not been a rehash of the borrowers.
No, I think it's fine.
Do you know, I think Hilsie did a borrower joke on the last leg
of the last episode, the, you know, they're little people that they're so little that they won't get offended. Yeah, they're not going to get any angry letters from borrowers, don't worry.
Okay, good.
They can't bloody reach the letterbox, am I right?
I think I don't read them anyway.
They're all tiny pencils.
So, thin, the's her daughter Summer Rose Good Year, age almost two. Almost two, Summer Rose Good Year.
What a name that is.
I feel like Summer Rose Good Year is either going to be this sort of like floaty,
hippie through life of just like magical, just doing, I just do this now, just do that,
or the biggest Karen has ever existed with that name.
You could just imagine her with like a perm shouting about a football going in a garden. Well judge it from this then let's judge it from this. We are very fortunate after many years we're
trying to conceive naturally in through IVF we have a gorgeous almost two
year old girl however after multiple 4 a.m.
Wom mommu mommie at the top of her voice or Gruffello where are you on
repeat to the bed with us to try and still getting up and
starting our day.
Four a.m. I thought we'd try voice recording.
So that's at four a.m.
I was going to say it.
Well, what is to be fair, I reckon I could sleep through the top of her voice.
I won't bother me.
Yeah. That's not waking me up. I mean, you've got to do something for it for him. Why not record something for a podcast? Exactly. Well, I've actually, do you know what?
I'm going to come to worries about sleeping,
my own worries about sleeping later.
But it's a huge, hugely sad day for me, Rob.
Oh no, what's happened?
I don't know whether you've ever experienced something like this, Rob.
But I've slipped down the pecking order in terms of famous people from my secondary school.
Oh, well it's a head-to-head fight between me and Tom Allen at our school and I think he's going
to overtake me or he's already nudging me ahead. I think I got to tell him before him but he's now bigger
and better than me. Not at all. Not at all. It's neck and neck with me and Tom. I mean, Bradley from East Enders was far and away. Charlie Clements was destroying us for years.
Yeah. And the stench of Steve Backe and he was still in the gym changing. I don't know if he went to the
school but he lived in the area. But you know you knew he'd been there. You knew he'd thrown down on that on that on that but um yeah so me and Thomas are sort of neck and neck in it who's who's from your school?
Did you watch England be Sammarina last night? No I didn't because I enjoy
a competitive sport. Olli Watkins who scored on his England debut last night
went to my school. Ollie yes he is more famous than you now he He's beaten you, Josh. It's absolute heartbreak.
And also, the tragic thing is, I reckon,
if you had a good night's sleep,
you could have scored against San Marino as well.
If you've had the opportunity.
He's gonna be going to the bloody euros, Rob.
Well, all I'd say is, doing the Paralympics, the Olympics, the last
leg for years and years.
He can't just turn up and get a tapping.
Was it a tapping?
I don't know.
I don't watch it.
But anyway, he has overtaken, Josh, I'm afraid.
the P.S.P..P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.A. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. The. It. It. It. It. But. But. But. But. But. But. But...... It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It... It......................................................................................................................................................... Dinnie. He must be absolutely fucking buzzing, Mr. Dinnie.
Well yeah, considering what he had to work with the generation before and then he got delivered
Olly Watkins.
It's a real jump, isn't it?
You know, it's that Hobbit to Ork, the power of O've got like a got some skin in the game now. Do you know what I mean? Well yeah it's good to
it ups your game that's what I'd say about being the famous person from your school.
You're now you've got to now compete with Olly Watkins and try and trump him you know.
Well could he deliver a blistering 20 up the creek comedy club on a Friday night.
No, because I couldn't back in the day. God, so I did I did it before you did it.
I thought I need to get in here, mate.
I sniped you during a mid-self harm line from you.
I felt horrible then, you was already pulling yourself down.
Well, I'll tell you what, if I'd said that and neither of us had picked up on it, it would have been a shame on you, but no, to be fair, Josh,
you are an excellent comedian and you would strike fear in the heart
of all the other open-mite comics when you turn up at competitions.
And we all know you beat me at the Lester Mercury competition back in 2010,
even though you've been going two years longer than me, but let's not get bogged down by the the the the the the the the the competition, the competition, the thion thion the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thii, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, to, to, to, to, to, to, tho, tho, you, you, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, to be thi, to be thi, to be to be thi, thi, thi, thi, to be to be to be too, too, too, and, too, too, too, toooooooooooooo, and too, too, too,. Yeah even though I got to go on in the second half because I've been in a train crash. Okay let's not get bogged down by the past Josh just
talk about the present. What else has been happening in your life? I'm a bit worried. That's classic
widows though, isn't it? Yeah, no not about it. That's neutral. Just general. So I've got to go away away to film film. Now. So the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the. the. Just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just to to film. Just. Just to film. Just. Just to to to to to to to to to just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just to to to to to to to to to to to to to to film. Just. Just. Just. Just. Just. Just. Just. Just. So. So. So. So, the present. So, the the the the the the the the the present. So. So. So, what's. So, what's. So, what's. So, what's. So, what's. So, what's the the to. I. So, what's. I's. So, what's. So, what's to. So, what's the the a thing where I can't sleep in hotels, Rob. I'm bad at
sleeping in hotels.
Okay, why, what's that? What's the problem?
I just got a mental block and I haven't had to do it for a year and now I'm really nervous
that I'm not going to be able to sleep. I've already seen that the call is fine the next morning. Judge, you are, you are, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, you, you, you, you have, you have, you have, you have, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you have, you have, you have, you have, you have, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th, th. th. th. th. th. th. th th th th th th to have, have, have, have, the the the the the the the the the the the picked the wrong podcast to complain about going to a hotel on your own.
There will be zero, everyone's listening to this, just going, fuck off.
Just stay awake all night, you'll still have more energy than looking after kids.
But I think I'm gonna stay awake or not. I just, I've already talked my way out of it, Rob.
Well, can I tell you what I would tell. I would take my own pillow. I do that anyway.
I would also take a candle that then makes the room smell nice.
Laura Whitmore, Tom, with this actually.
She always takes a candle with her when she travels, and it's the same candle she has at home,
so then the room smells at home.
Oh, that's good get some shut-eye. Oh God I'm nervous about it. I'll be interested to know how you get on but it'll be interesting as well to hear about the parenting podcast when you're not parenting.
You might sound completely different. How's it been with her parenting though? How's how's Rose as well because she's quite heavily pregnant now? Movable, the movable? How's it? How's those? How's the the the the the the the the the the the there? How's the there? How's the there? the the the the the the the the the the th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. I. I. I. I? I. I? I? I? I? I's. I's. I's. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I'm thi. I'm thro. I'm to. tod th. the today. the. the. the. today's to to to to to to so she's sort of on the sofa. It's so much more difficult
than the first one, isn't it? Did you find this? Well it's because there's a kid running about,
thinne it? Because there's a kid running about, yeah. So it's just like... Are you carrying a lot of the nursery runs? Yes, understandably. Yes. And I'm not going to lie, Rob. The news we had last thr-I I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. the th. th. th. the th. th. the the th. th. the the the th. the th. the the the th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. tooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. It's. It's. It's. It's, th lie, Rob, the news we had last week that one of the teachers
lives near us and is willing to bring our daughter home for a small fee is probably the greatest
news I've ever had in my life.
Right, what's the fee?
What's the fee?
What, the fee?
Surely she's on a way, is it?
Yeah, but you can't go, you're all right, she's just to do.... 12 pounds. 12 pounds, what a week? No, because
it's an hour, isn't it? She takes her from the nursery to our house, which takes more or
less an hour. Really? Is it an hour walk? On the bus? On the bus? On the bus? So do you normally
drive her to nursery then? I, you can walk it in half an hour. You can get the an hour on the bus? It takes 45 minutes, but you've got to wait for the bus, you. Oh, right.
So she gets the bus home with her.
This is miles away this nursery.
Yeah, well, it is Rob.
I knew the woman who ran it, and she's really nice.
And then we went to look at it.
It's a bit like, you had to.
You had this this this this this this th the school the school the school the school to go to difficult to then go yeah but this one I don't like is nearer. You paint 12 quid a day for your... No, she does it once or twice a week.
All right okay I get you. All right fair enough. So you can use it if you've got work or
beatings. All right I'll get you. Okay fair enough. I can say that is a that is a especially the London council tax has got up by 9 honest with you Rob, I opened the letter,
looked at it and this is how a cross finance I am. I thought, bloody hell, that's steep.
Maybe I just didn't realize it's always been that steep. No, but it's their skin. I didn't realize,
I just presume that's what I'd always been paying because I'm not really across stuff like that.
Josh, we've just stumbled into the mundane chat of the week. Sorry. There's two men furious about their counts of tax bills, even though one of
them pays 12 quid for their kid to get a bus home.
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Eligibet.
But the parenting bid okay, you've got that you've got the babysitting, that's helping
then with Rose pregnant.
Yeah, it's all good.
It's all good at the moment.
I, should I be honest about how I'm feeling about the second one?
Yes.
Very excited about the baby.
Yes, of course.
Excited about Rose not being pregnant anymore.
I think she cannot fucking wait.
I think my tha th, it it it's tha, it's tha, it's tha, thatuuuatuatuatuatuatuatuatatatatatatatatatat, the that, that, the that, that, that, their that, that, that, that, it's that, it's that, it's that, it's that, it's that, it's that, it's thus, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that, it's that, that, that, that, that, that, that, the that, the the the that, the the the the that, that, the that, the that, that, that that that that that that that that Yeah. I think my main concern is my daughter's reaction to the new baby.
Yes, but that's classic anxiety and you literally, there's nothing you can do now,
thinking about it, it's a waste of time because there's nothing you can do until it comes.
So you just have to try and blank that out and I hope for the best. Was it all right for you? Because my mates the mate tha that my mate that my mate that my mate thathea, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, thi, thi, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooi. I's, is thi. thi. thi. thi, blank that out. And I hope for the best. Was it all right for you? Because my mates just had a baby.
And his son, he ain't happy about it.
How old's the son?
Two and a half?
Two and a half?
The present thing works, bringing them back
a present.
And just making sure you've got tie.
Yeah, I think it's a bit a bit a bit a bit a bit a bit a bit a bit a bit a bit a bit bit bit bit. They get them really well, the five-year-old and three-year-old get them really well, but my oldest was coming back from school talking about her friends' brothers going,
and their sisters at the school go, yeah, they don't like their sister because they make their house messy.
So I think it's uni so I wouldn't
get too stressed.
Exactly, exactly. How has your parenting been? Do you know what? It's really uptits game
today because the coffee machine has been broke. I've been on instant coffee and now I'm back
on grinding my own bean man. I'm grinding my bead in the morning and I'm flying. I'm a souped up football hooligan on an away day. Four cans in.
How many coffees are you on a day?
Just the one at the start?
Paraly, three.
No, I'm two or three.
Two or three.
Two or three if it's been bad.
Oh, and what time would you be your, do you have like, to be your, do you have, like, I'm over, I, the, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, the, the, the, the, the, the, to, to, the, to, to, to, to. Oh, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the,'clock. Yeah, which is quite late but I'm loving it. I'm loving life. I think I'm I'm over getting a dog. I saw a lady with a great dame picking up its shit with two hands.
I've never seen a two and shit pick before have you? Two hands in the bag. It was such a big shit?
Yeah. Oh God. I've never, so that's put me off. What else has happened? Oh, there's been a terrible problem. My cat Alan has been eating ice creams that he's got out of the freezer himself
and wiping the ice cream on the wall with his paw according to my three-year-old.
Oh, I see. So I can send you the photo. There's finger marks of ice cream
that's been wiped on the wall. And said to the three-year-old what
happened here and she said Alan did it and proceeded to explain that Alan
goes to the freezer and gets ice creams out, eats them and wipes his finger on
the wall and the five-year-old backed her up and said yes he does dothat, I saw it. He's got big old paws, doesn't he?
He's got big, almost like hands, aren't they?
But the thing is, what I'd say is, yeah, sure,
my daughter does rub ice cream on the wall,
but she ain't a fucking grass.
Exactly, do you know what, Rob?
They're not grasses.
They'll back each other. They don't like you or respect you, but together, they really...
Yeah, they treat me like a screw at prison.
They're like Thelma and Louise.
But yeah, so that's, I'm going to have to talk to Alan about that, the cat for wiping ice cream on the wall.
But then what I did was, I was like, well, make sureto let me know so that's that's that's that's sorted I tell you what did happen though right we've but you're aware
of this because we can't do live shows anymore at theatres are all shut
because of the old pandy d I do for an industry or a company or a company conference.
They'd get a comedian on at the end with a magician.
Anyway, I did one for this company and I always try and get an interesting fact about all the people
that are attending so that I can have a bit of a chat with them.
So it's not just me sort of doing jokes awkwardly on Zoom.
There's a bit of interaction. It makes it a bit more unique. Anyway, so I got all the info through and there was, you know, classic stuff like, oh, you know, I went to school with Jamiro Choir, you talk about that. A bird
once slapped me around the face with a burger, it is like a Seago attacked, you know, all
all these sort of funny things that have happened. I got drunk at Redding. Anyway, one, one person, It came up and it said, I've I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I've I've I've one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one, one Baftas. Whoa! This is, what a story this is, okay?
I was Romesh.
Anyway, so I thought, I talked to this person
because it was, it was like in a different industry, it wasn't even, I was like,
so I was chatting to her and I go, um, oh yeah, so what did you win the bafters for?
She said, well, writing, but I didn't write it, someone else wrote it, and for best drama. And I was like, what? It turns out it was a drama satisization of this woman's life story who'd been in a tragic,
horrendous accident.
Okay.
I'm not going to say what it was for the privacy reason, but like lots of people died
and she survived.
So the mood obviously dropped and it was this horrific story about this woman's sort of survival from this this ic accident. I'm trying to do a comedy set. So obviously my first reaction is, right?
Right, you're stretching it, that you've on a baftery. Like, sure it's about you.
But you've not done the legwork, but I didn't bring that up. She's been from a lot, right? Exactly. Oscar Schindler didn't win an Oscar. toe. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. thiii. toe. toe. thi. toe. thi. thi. thi. toe. thi. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. thi. toe. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. I th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I's. I'm. I'm th. I'm th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. thr. the. the. So. toe whole thing confusing. So anyway, that's fine. I didn't want to bog down on that. And I thought, how am I going
to get out of this? We're now talking about a tragic life story that she's managed to overcome
and get a career somewhere else. You'll never guess what her next fact was after she told And it was like a gift from the comedy gods. She had done the Congo with Frankie DeToria a wedding.
Oh my God!
Oh my God!
Oh, I was like, here we go.
Beckets back in the game.
I've rescued victory from the jaws of defeat!
Oh wow!
I couldn't believe it.
It was, it was magic, Josh, and I've never been so stressed.
Oh, did it? He led it.
He led it.
He led it.
Of course he bloody did.
And I said how, you know, was it just you two?
And she went, yeah, we'll at the start.
They're not at the end.
Because I don't know about you.
If you're at a wedding, and you with Frankie Dutori. In my head he's in his jockey outfit. I know he's not. Right, green. But in my head he's wearing the full, whatever
they call the silks. And he's whipping, or you're giving them hole for them to bite?
She doesn't eat, she's on raisins now, which are tiny grapes.
She doesn't eat grapes? She doesn't eat grapes.
Well we haven't really had any grapes in in ages.
But were we to get grapes? Do I need to cut them? the thi tho' th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she, she's, she's, she's, she's, she's thin, she's thin, she's thin, she's thin, she's tho, she's tho, she's thin' thin' tho, she's tho, she's tho, she's tho, she's tho, she's tho, she's So we've been cutting them but now Lou saying the youngest is three, I still think too young
to trust with biting them in half.
But then you don't want to be that parent that's still peeling the prawns when they're
14. Yeah, I would naturally cut the grape. I would naturally cut the grape. Ceremony. the chchchchch. C cherry. C cherry. C cherry. Crettea. Crettea. Crettea. Crettea. Crettea. Crettea. Crettea. Crettea. Crettea. Crettea. Crettea. Crettea. Crettea. Crettea. Crettea. Crete. Crettea. Crettea. Crettea. Crete. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. L. L. thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. the. thomatoes. You chopped the tomato, you'd chop a grape, but you haven't had any in, she's still on raisins, fair enough.
Okay, next one, lollipop.
Do you let them, you know, like a chab-chub,
put the whole lollip in the mouth or does they just lick it?
And I don't know why I'd tell them this but I'm not the loky the whole lollipop in the mouth, isn't it? Yeah, she hasn't really, she's not into lollipops, it's, she's an ice cream lolly person.
But not, she's not had a chub-chub type lolly.
She has and I don't think she was that fast.
You know what I mean?
She's, ice cream, mad.
She's like, she's absolutely obsessed with the situation because my nursery is four billion miles away from me that she will often fall asleep in the Pram home
Which is obviously disastrous
Yes, that is a nightmare
So I've got in a situation of getting her an ice cream on the way home just purely to keep her awake
Yeah, but to be fair. She sounds like she's on some sort like city banker commute the commute. It's an hour commute. That's a long day for a kid. Halfway through the commute. She the commute. She the commute. She. She. She. She's the commute. She. She's the commute. She. She's th. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. the th. th. th. th. the th. the the. the the the the the the the the the the the. the the. the the. the. the. the. Halfway through the commute, she's got through the metro.
She's got nothing else to read.
The metro has got to be the most pointless paper in it.
It's like reading Twitter three days later.
It's like a nostalgia piece.
Oh yeah, I remember that.
Oh, there's a boat stuck in the Sue's canal. Who knew? It's a ship. That's a that might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might might that might that might that might that might that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that. Oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, tha. Oh, tha, tha, tha, that. Oh, tho. Oh, tho. Oh, tha' tho. Oh, tho. Oh, tho. Oh, tho. Oh, tho. knew? It's a ship. It's a ship. That might, at time
of podcast recording, that ship may have moved. So apologies if I'm delivering you Metro
News at this point. But if you are coming to this podcast for your news, you're making
a huge mistake. Can I tell you a pet peeve of parenting, Josh? Yeah. A PPP? APIE? A parenting pet peeve, the triple PEE is when the kids slightly older,
I'd say ranging from about 9 to 13, and like if they're walking along with their parent and say
they're at the school or something, they cross along the grass and the parent feels awkward
and the parent goes, oh, what are you doing, Abigail? Don't go on the grass.
You must go on the pave, the park.
Don't go on the grass, go on the path for the pavement.
And then sort of gives me an eye roll,
because they're sort of awkward.
Are they worried about what you're sort of worried.
their today. their, yeah, yeah, yeah, thoahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahs, I I was was, I was, I was, I was, I was, their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th th th th tho. thoes. thoes. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. t toooooooooooooooooooa. ta. to. to. to. to. the the thooooooooooooo. their. of their child. But then that as a kid used to really annoy me so then you're just sort of embarrassing the child for no reason and I don't care if
anything you make me feel better about my kids because your ones being naughty.
My dad used to quite enjoy embarrassing us Rob as children. I think my dad would have enjoyed us
crossing the grove like he would as a kind of old hippie from the 60s he quite liked the idea the groan. Like he would, as a kind of old hippie from the 60s, he quite liked
the idea of his children being a bit rebellious, do you know what I mean? So he would encourage the
grass walk? He wouldn't encourage the grass walk, but he certainly wouldn't have worried about you
walking across the grass. Yeah, I mean, there's only a little corner of it, but I think
the people get so awkward and panicked and I'm like, your kids's you if you keep doing that, like an embarrassing him in front of other grownups.
Yeah, how are your parents?
Would they embarrass you in front of other grownups?
Oh my god, my dad's a nightmare.
Is he?
He's such an attention seeker.
Really?
What kind of things would do you do?
They were very welcoming. the point of they were more entertaining than us. So they'd go around there, my dad would be like, it would all be sitting and watching the telly and he'd walk in and then just start
going, oh look, you know, if you've got your jeans a bit low, oh we're in your jeans
low, are you? Like that? Oh, I see, couldn't try and cuddle me in front of my mates when I'm about 14 and all that?
Oh my God, Rob.
But it, not nothing, it wasn't,
it wasn't never too awkward and embarrassing,
like if your parents,
because they weren't stiff-necks,
they were quite loose,
but it's not anything. and they're embarrassing because the parents are weird. That's a different level, isn't it? There's, yeah, I think the worst
would you go to someone's house and it'd be quite sterile,
do you know what I mean?
Yes, or they tell them off and then you're sat there,
the worst is when your friend,
and you're sat there and like,
this is the worst thing that was awful. What I once went to, he wasn't a friend. He was like, you know when you're tentatively,
is this person gonna be my friend?
I must have been about 12.
There was a lot of farmers at my school, Rob.
And also when it was bailing season,
they'd get time off as well to help with the bailing.
Like it was the fucking 1900s.
Yeah, so I'm an that's, I I'm an evacu, this. So anyway, oh if I told you this about my primary school. So my primary
school was so small, yeah, that they didn't have any room to cook lunches on site.
Oh leave it out. So when we answered the register in the morning, rather than saying here we had to say packed or dinner's.
Right, depending on whether you have packed lunch or whether you wanted to school dinners. And then one of the children, and we would have been at eight or whatever,
was tasked with counting up the amount of people who said dinners, and then going to the
phone and then going to the phone and then the next school who would then send their
dinners across.
You had to the six in today that are having dinners and they deliver six luncheon. Who he brought across? You didn't have a kitchen at your school? We didn't have a kitchen.
Is that just like a church hall? I don't think that's a school. But that felt so normal to me.
That's not a school mate. That's just a built, it's like warehouse. Did you to a friend's house? Did you thi. to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their thrown. thrown. thrown. thrown. thrown. thrown. thrown. th. th. th. th. th. that. that. to go. to go. to th. to go. th. th. their their their their their their their their their their their their their church. their their church. their church. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. touch. touch. to. touch. touch. touch. touch. to. touch. touch. touch. touch. touch. th. th. tea and playing. Yeah, so that's what I was saying. When I was 12 or 13 at secondary school,
I went around to a potential friend's house.
I had lots of friends that actually like me.
I think we were doing like a school,
we'd been paired together in a school project or whatever.
He was a farmer's son.
And him and his mom.
I've never met of farmer mates.
I know I'll be very clear of I haven't got loads of farmer mates.
You went to school with farmers? Yeah that is a very different thing to having farmer mates.
I reckon I could get a gun quicker than a farmer to my ass.
Well the irony is Rob they've all got guns.
I'll ask him, you a farmer by any chance. I went around to his house and so it was some school project. He wanted, right?
we had to do a project on, say it was the Aztecs or whatever, he just got a PC. He said we could just
print it off in Carter and I was like, that is not gonna fly. In Carter, it was basically the internet when we were at school. Yeah, it was better than the internet. Let's be honest. Carter 97.
Yeah.
So you need it.
It got too complicated after that.
I got a computer.
I had in Carter on it.
It had the internet.
I tried them both.
And I was like, Him and his mum had these stand-up rouse that were like nothing I'd ever seen in my life,
right?
Really?
And then in the afternoon, he said, do you want to go ferreting?
You have been ferreting, Rob?
You've been ferreting, Rob?
No, but I'm just going on and carter to find out what it is. What's ferreting? Ferreting is he had some ferrets and you'd go and try and
like catch mice with ferrets. Well how do you want to catch a
hedges? This was the 90s. Yeah but what would it be is that like a farming purpose
thing to stop the mice eating in the crops or something or is it just a bit of a
little? Maybe I mean how effective it that's what they say about hunting, isn't it?
It's like to keep the fox numbers down or whatever.
I've never heard of a mouse eating chickens though.
No, no, no, no.
I don't know how much a field of corn is ruined by a mouse.
Do you know what I mean?
Yeah, just the poor bastard mouse.
So how many ferrets. So, were they on Leeds or did they just come back? Were they trained to come back? I don't know, you just put them down a hole and then they just come back, yeah.
I think had quite a weird upbringing, Rob.
Do you know what?
Yeah, I think you are.
Do you thrown.
Do you're worried all think the Germans are going to invade in two years.
Email in if you had a more rural upbringing than me. I do remember going to people's houses after school and I'd walk in and I could just I could just smell if there was no banter in the house.
You know you just get a feel like this house there's nothing happening in here.
This is a banter free zone this. I remember going to my friend's house, two of us went in and it stunk like a barber's. I've never been
in a place that smells more like. And my other friend that I was with, like, you know,
you don't realize what a barber's smell like until you smell a barber's. Do you know that? Is it that weird like watery stuff they put the scissors in and the blades? Yeah, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thee, thee, thee, thee, thee, thee, thee, thee, like, like, like, like, like, like, thin, like, thin, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, thi, they they they, that, that, that, they, that, that, that, that, the blades. Yeah I think it's the hair
spray that maybe only barbers use or whatever. Yes, when they spray all your hair down there.
Yeah. And we walked in and obviously you're polite and I thought I'm not going to say it.
And then my other mate who would come around to his house went, bloody hell it smells
like a barber's in here. The only places I could smell a lush and subway sandwich shop.
There are two smells.
Yeah.
I don't think there's any other high street smells other than those two that get me every time.
When they reopen, walk into a barbers have a sniff.
Oh my God.
I'll pop in Tony and guys for a quick sniff.
I mean, going past Lush is like being involved in chemical warfare.
It's horrendous. How much of working in there? Oh my God, that we've got tiny little eyes.
Just saw a little guard, Rob Beckett, the guardian eyes, just peeking out.
Rob.
Yes.
Yes.
Do you want some emails?
Oh, yes, please.
Oh, shall I open a present?
Yes, we need to, we didn't do one last week did we keep forgetting. She's not saying that she's never gonna she's pregnant and got a baby on the way.
Okay so these are presents from 2018 that I found in a bag that my wife is
still not sent to our relatives. Yep. So this is for Brendan. Oh this is a good
this is one I chose Rob. That's not do you know what? That's an absolute kick in the Jaffers, isn't it?
Kick in the Jaffers! I love, I've never heard you say that.
We're getting a lot of feedback, Josh saying that you say I'm not gonna lie a lot.
Yeah, I do say I'm not gonna lie a lot, don't I? Are they saying it's too annoying? They say, if anything, you should say it more. Imagine the opposite of that. And that's the feedback. But a kick to the Jaffers
is great. I like that. I'll give 20 Peter Charity every time I say I'm not going to lie. That
doesn't count because that was using it as an example. Fair enough. It's a book called the Anatomy of Manchester United history and 10 matches for the uncle.
Can I guess the match?
Who is a Manchester United fan?
Yeah, go on.
The 99 Champions League Final.
Yeah, it's got to be in there, isn't it?
Oh, wow, Rob.
Or is it the 99 semi-final against Arsenal?
Yeah, it's the semifinal. My favorite mannii-in the thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thin, the the the the the thin. thi, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. I thi. I thi. I's thin. I's th th th th th th th th th th th th th thinin. I's th th th thin. I's the on the head and then Alan Smith said Arsenal should be ashamed of themselves and I screamed
fuck off Alan Smith and then me and my brothers went to an all you can eat Chinese buffet to celebrate.
Well there you go. What a day that was. I was out ferreting I think when that match was on. Do you want some this is an amazing email Rob? Yeah from James Bramam-I. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that that that was. that that that that that was. that was. that was. I that that was. I that was. I that that was. I was. I was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was that was. I was that was that was that was that was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was out. I was out. I was out. I was out. I was out. I was out. I was out. I was out. I was out. I was out th. I was out th. I was out th. I was out th. I was out th. I was out th. I was out th. A th. A th. A th. A th. A th. A the email Rob? Yeah. From James Bramley.
Come on Brahmans.
Hi, Rob and Josh.
I was listening to Gabby Logan episode today while out on my post round and it jogged a memory
of something that happened to me many years ago.
Gabby was talking about the time her child was in a pram and it nearly rolled off the
pavement on the road in front of a lorry while she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she was she was she was she was she was she was she was she was she was she was she was she was she was she was she was she was she was she was she was she was outside she was outside she was outside she was outside she was outside she was outside she was outside she was outside she was outside she was outside she was outside she was outside she was outside she was outside she was outside she was outside she was outside outside
while she was outside Café Nero on Barnes High Street. God, he's got a good memory.
Absolutely, every detail there.
Is that a copper?
Well, I tell you why, she said that a bloke in shirt and jeans stopped it just in the
nick of time.
I think it may have been me.
Yes!
That's amazing!
I lived right opposite Cafe Neera at the time, just above the man in unsuitable clothing for cold November
day also matches me. Being a posty, I'm normally always in shorts and totally underdressed
for cold weather conditions both in and out of work time. I remember nipping down from my
flat to head to the local shop to get something on the way back. I have a vague memory
of seeing a pram roll away from a small group of Barnes' muums.
And she's definitely a Barnes mum, isn't she, Gabby?
Absolutely superb terminology.
Anyone who's been in Barnes will know Barnes mum is an absolute, it creates an image, doesn't
yeah, absolutely ripped a shit, successor in their career, loads of kids, smashing flat
white, seven a day, boom, let's go, yoga. I have a vague memory of seeing a prarara prprprprprpremememememem pr pr pr pr pr pr pr pr pr pr pr pr pr pr pr pr pr pr pr pr pr pr pr prem of a prem of s prem of s prem of s a th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I have a th. I have a th. I have th of s, I have a th. I have th. I have th of s, I have th. I have th. I th. I th. I th. I th. Absolutely, absolutely th. Absolutely, absolutely th, absolutely th, absolutely th, absolutely th, absolutely th, absolutely th, absolutely th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I have th, I have th, I have th, I have a th. I have a th. I have a thi thi thi, I have a vague memory of s theeeeeeeeeeeeean, I have thean, I have thean, I have thean thean, I have thean, absolutely the. I have a the. I have a vague memory of saying a pram rolling away from a small group of Barnes'
mums towards the road.
I'm not sure I realized there was a child in the pram when I stopped it.
I just didn't want to cause an accident.
Oh my God, it was that was bad.
It didn't feel like a big deal at the time and I didn't want to make a scene as it might be the size the size the size the size the size the size the size in the size of her kid now, I think the lorry had a lucky escape. Love the podcast. What a legend. I love, I've never met a bad posty. Post men and women are absolute legends.
And I've got a question about the shorts. Do you think being a post person, post back,
you're not without sex? What's the word now? What's the woke word? For a postal worker?
Postal worker. The sexy sexy voice Michael slipped in, producing from the back,
playing it up top. A postal worker. I bet he's got that man united book as well, haven't you,
I don't actually. I message on the group, I'll take it if no one's having it.
Right. So postal worker, which I'm going to say I would never have got to.
Right, so postal worker, yeah, always wear shorts.
Do they pick that job because they want to wear shorts or it's just the right attire for the job?
What do you reckon?
Yeah, I think it's peer pressure once you there.
Because I like wearing shorts, Rob. I'm wearing shorts at the moment. Don't you said you didn't like wearing shorsese. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thatting. thatting. thatheatheat, thatheat, thatheat, thatheatheatheatheatheatheat, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do, th. Do, th. Do, th. Do, th. Do, th. Do th. Do, th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do, th. Do th. Do, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, thr. Do thr. Do thr. thr. thr. thr. thooooooooooooa. Do the. Do thi. Do that, thi. Yes, okay. I like that. I would just wore them for the nursery drop-off.
Yeah, but that's because it's a six-hour-round trip.
Yeah, exactly, actually, exhausted by the time.
You don't be hot with a coat on doing that.
I think, I think it's peer pressure Yeah, also he called, he went, the other
day, he went, I love that show, do with rash. I've, people get Romish's name wrong a lot,
but I have never heard it be rashed off. Rash. I've had Ramesh, Rajesh, Rajesh. Rash.
Rash isn't an Asian name, is it? Rash, he sounds like a cartoon character.
Oh, Rush and Splinter, the whole two rabbits that are really fast.
Anyway, yeah, so well done James for saving the baby.
Yeah, good work to James. Do you want a lockdown low point?
Always. Which is small things that have tipped you over the edge during lockdown.
I'm eight months pregnant and have been redecorating prior to the baby's arrival.
Need a new carpet for the nursery, and I broke into tears because I couldn't stroke the carpet samples to see how soft they were due to buying them online.
Low moment? That is the best bit of carpet buying, isn't it?
It is the best bit of carpet buying.
You go to the shop, you rub your hand on them and go,
oh, I don't like that.
And then, because then, if you get to rub it,
you realize the one you're getting is really nice,
compared to all the others.
But online you don't get that, you that, you that, you that, you don't get tha, you don't, you don can't you? Don't tell her that.
She's already cried, but yes you can. If you order it, they send you lots of little samples. Yeah, oh bless. We just got loads of samples and just did the whole floor with them. Yeah,
exactly. I've always thought how many can you get away? If you went to different showrooms, could you cobble together a full floor? Yeah, I think you could that you. that you. that you. that you. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that that that th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. they they're the. to to to to they're to to they're to thee. they're they're the. they're they're they're the. they're think you could have a small room, small nursery. Oh bless her, but that's just, it's the pandemic getting you, isn't it?
Right, before the business shout-outs, Rob. Yes? Dear Rob and Josh, this is from Nathan
Tuffin. Hope you're doing well. I have a belated Christmas story with which I hope
you enjoy. The Christmas before last, my three-year-year-old daughter tree that we decided to name him Terry. We pretended he could talk and ended up treating him like a member of the family for the entire
month. When it was time for the decorations to come down, she was very sad so
he told her Christmas trees can't stay inside all year and Terry would be off
on adventures until next Christmas. When we would go and find him again. Cut to December 2020 where we took our family out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out out to the to the the to the the the to the to to the the the the to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the te. te. te. te. te. te. the te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. the the the the the the. We took our family outing to the local farm to pick out a Christmas
tree. My daughter was incredibly excited to see Terry again. She ran around the farm yelling,
Terry, Terry, and every time we looked at a tree, we would ask, is this one Terry? Do we think it's him?
Until eventually we picked out a tree we wanted and claimed that we had found Terry. Oh, that's a good idea. Well, it was thi that that thi that's a thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th idea. Well it was. My daughter was ecstatic and
proudly walked me so he hauled the tree to the checkout area. I was a little
confused when the man asked me what kind of Christmas tree stand we have at
home having never been asked that question before. Told him what type we
have and informed me this type would require the tree to have a flat stump at the bottom. Things hadn't quite clicked in my mind as the man dragged Terry off to one side,
then swiftly and violently took out a circular saw to his trunk.
It was so loud and it all happened too fast.
I tried to shield my daughter's eyes from the massacre happening in front of her.
And then frantically yelled, get her out of here to my partner, like a doctor and a medical drama,
trying to move a George Strapp family member
from the bedside of a dying relative.
My daughter was absolutely traumatized.
She burst into tears and kept asking,
what are they doing to Terry?
Oh God.
We had finally calmed her down, and then the man dragged the tree outside and shoved it in one of those netting machines which upset her all over again. Oh my God, just I've been kidnapped!
It was genuinely one of those stressful parenting moments for my entire life.
We will not be going to pick out a tree together next year.
Absolutely lovely podcast.
Keep up the great work, Nathan Tuffin.
Oh, Mr. Tuffin. Yeah, that is brutal. You can't even explain that to the bloke because you look insane. She thinks it's Terry and Terry's a tree.
Oh, God.
Right, we've got us have a quick shout out for these businesses that are...
Yeah, so we wanted to just, you know, after how difficult it's been for so many small businesses,
and big businesses, but small businesses particularly during lockdown, we thought it'd be nice to shout out some good small businesses of people that
listen to the show. Now, Michael will attest that we have had a lot of,
we've had a lot, haven't we, Michael? Yes, we're trying our best to get through them.
Yeah, I'd say hundreds. And just so people know, I am just picking them randomly. There's no system, so hopefully yours will get to to to to to to to th small to get th small th small th small to get th small th small to get th small th small thi to get through them. Yeah I'd say hundreds and just just so people know I am just
picking them randomly. There's no system so hopefully yours will get picked if it doesn't I apologize.
Yes. So we've got one here for tesk. So we've got one here for Tesco just you know, just show
every day value. No I've got one here, I've got one. Yeah Tesco, just, you know, let's just try every day value.
No, I've got one here, I've got one. Yeah, but thank you so much and genuinely,
you know, sorry that we can't read them all out,
but I don't know if people would listen.
This is a good one here.
This is for at fight back lager.
It's a new lager that's been brought out in lockdown and it gives 5P to the at music venue trust for every pint you buy.
So every time you buy a pint it gives money to music venue trust which is trying to save
the live events industry which is still shut.
So that's a good little get yourself a beer and help that industry.
Another one I've got here is section 27 clothing.
This is a Swansea based clothing company that do sort of 90s football and rave culture
clothes like bucket hats and t-shirt.
Keep talking my language.
Well, you're gonna love it.
It's got like acid rain logos.
It's got photos of like football fans on away days and stuff.
You can find them on Instagram and it's S27 clothing and yeah, they've, they've started up, I think they've been on furlough the people people the people the people the people the people the people the people the people the people th, that that that that th, that that that that that that that that that thuuil, thuil, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's thuil, that's that's that's, that's, that's, that's, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, thuil, that's, that's, that's, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's thuuuil, thuil, thuil, thuil, thuil, thuil, thuil, thuil, thuil, thuil, thu, thu, thu, thu, thu, thiiiii's thu.I's thii's thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu... Clothing and yeah they've started up I
think they've been on furlough the people have started the company and they
start this company to try and a you know try new business so go to S27
clothing on Instagram for some 90 stuff which you'll love Josh I will you
know me Rob I'll be honest with you I don't like the present day you hate the pre you want all you want is to wear a buck a b b b b b b a b. a b. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to to the to to to to to the the to to the the the the their a their a their. their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I their. I their. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the the the the the th. the the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the I don't like the present day. You hate the present. All you want is to wear a bucket hat and go ferreting.
And listen to blur on a cassette.
Get me a fucking ferret. Let me read in Carter.
And let's go, let's go, I want a bit of incart and I'm going to fuck some mice up.
Do you know what? Because I live in the countryside, yeah Hi, I have a small business called Little Green Crafts,
which is www.littlegreencrafts.co. UK. And one of the things I make, which lockdown parenting,
how listeners might like, are teddies from children's drawings. Oh, that's cool. That's great,
isn't it? I've attached a few examples for you to see. So if you're, oh they're really good. If your children do a drawing then she can make teddies from them, which is a really great kind
of thing. Do you know what I think we should do Rob? What we'll do? What we'll do?
What we'll do? What we'll do? What do? their things's fine. Yeah. This business bit is not going out at all, is it, Michael?
Oh, he just keeps putting adverts out for his editing and production business. Before we go,
we've got a really funny story that's just come from on Instagram about unexpected pregnancy Josh. From Lisa, the moment has passed. the thrown. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. to to to toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. too. thi. toe. toe. to to to toe. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's th. the th. to. to. to. the the the the the th. the th. the th. the the th. th. this. this. this. th. th. th. I'm sure the moment has passed not for us Lisa don't you worry about it for another surprised baby story but I have to tell
you I have a school friend who had three children all grown up and I think at
the time her youngest was about to start secondary school at age 11 or 12.
It's pretty safe to say they were on the way to having adult children.
One evening my friend started to experience back pain so she took Paracetanum I went to bed. She woke up early the next morning in so much pain,
she told her husband she should go to A&E. So they got in the car, whilst in the car on the
journey she told her husband she had this They got to the hospital only to discover she was actually
in labor and a few minutes after being told the news she gave birth. She had no idea she was
pregnant. She celebrated her 40 if in this time. She didn't put on much weight or any of the
other symptoms of pregnancy. So the entire thing was a complete shock. So imagine being 40 and thinking you're done
with kids and you are back in the nappy zone. Oh my God Rob with what I've got
planned for my 40s which is from the age of 42 it's gonna be mid-90s Alex James
style hedonism is how I'm planning on living my life. You're gonna get sucked off in the grouch show? I'm gonna get sucked off in the grouch. I'll tell you what Josh I cannot wait to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I'm th. I'm th. I th. I th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I'm the th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. thi thi tooooooing tea' tea' thea' thea' thi. thi. I'm thi. I'm thi sucked off in the Groucho? I'm going to get sucked off in the Grouch show. I'll tell you what, Josh, I cannot wait to be sat there next year, ripped of a six-back
watching.
Can't wait to me my 40s.
Do you know what?
He'd be a fucking great guest on this?
He's got a fiege.
Get him up. I might... Oh you can't go too James from Andrew. No but he hasn't got a kid. Oh that's the perfect crime.
Oh I'll see what I can do. All right, okay. Let's get Alex James on. Right, um let's see you on
the true. We'll do a bit more correspondence on Friday. Yeah I thought it was a good episode that really enjoyed that. Yeah me too. I'm not criticizing it. No, let's not fall out. No, let's not fall fall fall fall fall fall fall fall fall fall fall fall fall fall fall out. No, I. No, I. No, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, I'll that, I'll that, I'll that's not, I'll th that. Let's not, I'll that. Let's not, I'll that. I'll that. I'll that. Let's not. Let's not. Let's not. Let's that. Let, I'll that. Let, I'll that. Let, I'll that. Let's not. Let's not. Let's not. Let's not. Let's not. Let's not. Let's not. Let's not. Let's not fall fall fall fall fall fall fall fall fall fall out. Let's not fall out fall out fall out fall out fall out fall out fall out fall out fall out fall out. Let's not fall out fall out. Let's not fall out fall out. Let's not fall out fall out fall out fall out, let's not fall out fall out fall out fall out. Let's not fall out fall out, let's not fall out fall out. Let's not fall out. Let's not fall out. Let's stake here now. We can't fall out.
Do you think if we got divorced from our partners it would make the show better or worse?
I think we'd have to have like a month's break but then I think it'd be fine.
You got as parenting, Rob.
Yeah, well I'll get to see him in three weeks time.
Do you know what? It would make the recording schedule easier. I would have plenty of time. Why am I getting divorced, not you?
I think I'm more annoying.
This is the bleakest end to an episode.
But...
No, but if you had to have a bet on who would get divorced first?
I don't know, who'd you reckon?
I think you're a more mentally together human what, have a little look at my YouTube search history and then we can talk about that.
We'll see you on Friday.
Bye.
Bye.
Bye.