Parenting Hell with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe - S05 EP38:Tom Parry (The Return)

Episode Date: December 2, 2022

 Joining us this episode to discuss the highs and lows of parenting (and life) is the return of the brilliant comedian, actor and writer - Tom Parry. Tom's new film 'Your Christmas or mine?' is ava...ilable now on Amazon Thanks, Rob + Josh. We're going on tour!! Fancy seeing the podcast live in some of the best venues in the UK? Of course you do, you're not made of stone! Tickets available now on the dates and at the venues below. We can't wait to see you there... ON SALE NOW  14th April 2023 - Manchester AO Arena 19th April 2023 - Nottingham 20th April 2023 - Cardiff  21st April 2023 - London (The O2) 23rd April 2023 - London (Wembley) 28th April 2023 - Birmingham Utilita Arena  If you want to get in touch with the show here's how: EMAIL: Hello@lockdownparenting.co.uk TWITTER: @parenting_hell INSTAGRAM: @parentinghell A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: hello@keepitlightmedia.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hello, I'm Rob Beckett. And I'm Josh Widdickham. Welcome to Parenting Hell, the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent, which I would say can be a little tricky. So, to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern-day parenting, each week we'll be chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping. Or hopefully how they're not coping. And we'll also be hearing from you the listener with your tips, advice, and of course,
Starting point is 00:00:36 tales of parenting woe. Because let's be honest, there are plenty of times when none of us know what we're doing. Looking for a collaborator for your career, a strong ally to support your next level success, you will find it at York University School of Continuing Studies, where we offer career programs purpose-built for you. Visit continue. York You.C.A. I'm going back to university for zero dollar delivery fee. Up to 5% off orders and 5% Uber cashback on rides. Not whatever you think university is for.
Starting point is 00:01:12 Get Uber won for students. With deals this good, everyone wants to be a student. Join for just $4.99 a month. Hello, you're listening to Parenting Hill with. Can you say Rob Beckett? Rock Beckett. And Josh Widdickham. Say Josh Whittakum? Say Josh Widdickum? Thank you. This is Jack 35 months, nearly three, with his baby brother Ellis, eight months in the background. We are from Holton near Lancaster.
Starting point is 00:01:43 Three and eight months. Three and eight months. Three and eight months. Woo-hoo! Mama. We've been listening from the start and laughed every week. Except one. No. It's kept us sane. My husband, Ben and I like to use a Crosby's law question to passively aggressive say,
Starting point is 00:01:59 they say what's annoying us in a joky, in quotation-marked way. We haven't tried the nice the nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice nice the nice. the nice. the the the to to toe. toe. toe' too' too' too' too' too' too' too' to to to to to to to to too' to to. to. to. to. We' to. We' to. We' to. We' to. We' th. We' th. We' th. We'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'n'e. the. the. tho'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'e'n' way. We haven't tried the nice bit yet. Thanks for the laugh. Danielle Walker, 34 years old. How are you, Rob? Yeah, I'm all good. Another gig more gigs don't are nearly home, be home next week. So I'm very excited about coming home. When you get home are you going to go big style on being a great parent? Like to make up for it, do you know what I mean? Well, Lou's going away in January with a friend, like five nights, so that's Lou sort of little trip away to look forward to.
Starting point is 00:02:33 So she's got that, but yeah, when I get back, we've got loads of stuff planned that they're gonna have a kids Tuesday, where they get to choose what wall climbing in the to start the morning so we're going to go that and do that as a family all of us are going to do it and then they can do whatever they want they can choose. If anyone's got any advice or some sort of ground rules on if anyone's done the kids choose stuff and they also call it a yes day in America we just have to say yes oh Oh my word, are you nervous about that? I'm quite excited actually. It's really quite fun because then it's something like, most of the time I do want to
Starting point is 00:03:07 say yes, but my sort of adult parent brain goes, oh no, I probably shouldn't do that, should I, also when I just say that out loud, I'm a dad with responsibilities as to go, no, you shouldn't do that because of this, but I just sort of like at the moment I'm just a bloke and just wanders around and then does a gig. Yeah, because I'm trying to live in the moment. I'm like, oh yeah, I've got kids, haven't I? That I have to sort sort of tear off sometimes. I just dawned on me that I've got like children. When you're looking after them, you're so in it. I'm looking after him.
Starting point is 00:03:50 I've got children. I'm just a man who sleeps, shit, I walk. You're just a man who sleeps, shit and walks. That's all you are at the moment. Absolutely. I sleep, I walk, I walk and talk on stage and then go back to sleep again. But yeah. As I'm talking to, I was like, yeah, I've got children.
Starting point is 00:04:09 I sort of, you sort of forget, when you're in the middle of your life, you sort of forget what you're doing, don't you? When you're busy with, like, when you have space to think, I've got a wife and children. I'm old. I've realized I was old as what in the strip. I met up with one of my friends who were in Adelaide. If anyone's read my book, I met out with a Howard, so this lovely family that sort of took me under their wing. Yeah, when I was in Adelaide, a years ago when you're a young buck. I did it again. A young buck. I keep saying I had no money. I was in a young. I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was a th. I was a th. I was a th. I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was a th. I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was a. I was a. I was a th. I was a th. I was a th. I was a th. I was a th. I was a th. I was a th. I was a th. I was a t. I was a tried, I was a too. I was a th. I was a th. I was a th. I was a th. I money, I was skinned and they looked after me and drove me around and bought me dinners and stuff like that. Anyway, so their daughter who's like a grown-up now, she's like a 25-year-old midwife, she lives up near Brisbane, so I met her for some lunch and stuff like that and you know,
Starting point is 00:04:56 it's nice to catch up and friends turned up, and they're all 25. And like, they're not like, they're they're all 25, they're they're they're all 25, they're they're th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, that, thi, thi, thi, thi, th-a, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th, th, th, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thir thirty, thirty, thirty-a'''' thirty-a'-nough, thou-n't, thirty-a'-a'-a'er, thirty-a, thirty-a, thirty-nough, then it's like young, 25's like a grown woman, isn't it? Like, it's a prop, that's like an adult. It's not like 19 or twenty- All right, I can't talk to the police now. No, but I just felt 36. I was just sat there and I was like, I am so fucking up. Yeah, the jump between 25 and 35 and you've got two kids. I was like, this is fucking, this is fucking, this is fucking, this is fucking, this is fucking, this is fucking, than, thin's thin's this is fucking, thin's thin's thin's thin' thin' thin' thin' thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. I's like, thi, thi. I's th, th, th, th, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, th, th. No, th. No, th. No, th. No, th. No, th. No, thi. No, thi. No, thi. No, thi. I's, thi. I's, thi. I's, I's, I's, I's, I'm, thi. I'm, no, I'm, no, no, I'm, no, no, no, no you get like a middle-aged divorcee who then gets a young partner? I always think the worst thing about that. I think one on one, I think that would be all right. The worst thing would be when you've then got to go and like socialize with their friends. Do you know what I mean? When you're the old person going on the lash with some 25 year olds, you'd just be like,
Starting point is 00:05:50 this is weird. Yeah, because also they're quite like, you know, grown up, they've got careers and they got, but like, and they were lovely, but I'm like, I'm 36 and they're 25, it's not even a big gap. If I had a 25 girl friend, it would be like, oh that's a big gap, but it wouldn't be like, oh my God, that's disgusted. I was 11 years is a bit too long, but it's not like, it's not like newspaper like, yeah, purvey relationship is if you see some of these old folks have like 20-year-old, but I was like, I was like, I just stood there in the call in a the call in the call in the. I'm not just stood there in the call of like an end-ups concert going, what the fuck
Starting point is 00:06:28 am I doing here? I'm dressed up like your 25. Oh, I tell you what, I tell you, I went to a dualipa gig on my own. Oh yeah, you did say this on the show? They were lovely, but they were just like, about 25 minutes, it was just like, they were all traveling and someone, one of my boyfriends, one of them didn't and they were just talking about, and they were like, yeah, just go up and do that. Did they know who were. Either, either, they would come up to Brisbane if I'm going to come to the show she went brilliant I come my friends can I have four tickets
Starting point is 00:07:07 I was like yeah sure like and I got there I had a night off before the show so went oh do you want to go for some drinks watch your Australia game because it was on against the tune of yeah yeah yeah Cornish she went I went and her friends to their too to to to to to to to to to their to their their their their their their their their their friends their friends their friends their friends their friends their friends their friends their friends their friends to to to to to their their friends their friends their to their their their friends their friends their friends their friends and their friends and their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their friends their friends th th th thr thr thr throwne throwne to to throwne to try. try. tru. true true their friends their friends their friends their friends their the next day for the gig and then she had a friend who she met in IBifa six years ago who is traveling and is from Finland and then she met another girl a week a week and was from Finland on some sort of Facebook traveling group so they'd known each other a week and then they'd gone up to Brisbane so so it's a group at the bar I met either the the the th I th I th I th I th I th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and th and they they they they they they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they the the they'd thrown the thrown thrown the thrown they're they they they they they they they they're they're they they're they'd they're they're they're they'd they're they're they're they're they the bar, I met Eva who I met twice 10 years ago when I was in the age, right? When she was 15. 15 and now she's 25, which doesn't sound good if you're talking to police Eva, does it really? Anyway, so she turns up, so I've met her a couple of times, we always talk about the Wapsack group with her parents and stuff. Anyway, so she turns out with her friend that she's known six years ago from Finland and this other girl that she just met a week ago, but Eva has only met her an hour
Starting point is 00:08:09 ago because she didn't know she was coming. They met me in the bar, so I'm meeting these two people the first time. My tour manager is there, lovely Justin, who I have only known for two weeks. Right? So no one really knows anyone. his drinks. And then we go every couple of drinks, we go and get some food. And Justin went, oh, my cousin and his girlfriend are in town. They're going to come for dinner. I was like, okay, I'm sat on a dinner table. I don't know these people. I know it either. I know it either.
Starting point is 00:08:34 I know it either. But anyone else, everyone else I've known for about an hour. And no one else knows each other either. I felt like a mature student, you know like, well you have to meet everyone that's when you call. Oh God. Oh, hello, yeah, I'm 36. Yeah, it didn't really work out for me. I'm back here now. What am I like?
Starting point is 00:08:54 Do you want to couple of Boomer Australians stories? Yeah? Yeah before we go into the guest? Yeah? I love what's got an Australian special. Go on? Yeah. Howdy? Grew up in Darwin in the 70s, early 80s and spent a lot of weekends camping in the bush. One trip that stands out, this feels like I've just made up an Australian email doesn't it? But there we go. Howdy. Gowdy. Gowdy. Gow up that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th is th th th th th th th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th th th th th th th we we th we th we th we we th is th. the tho the tho the thooooooooooo. the the the the the the the the thooooo. the the tho.oddy doesn't sound Australian, does it? No. Good day. Grew up in dark night. Absolutely thaw can rip her. One trip that stands out, the mom's job, so that the one trip stands out with a couple of other families into the bush.
Starting point is 00:09:36 About eight kids under 12. The mom's job was to sort the dads were on drinks. We drove for three hours into the middle of nowhere. Arrive, no shade, 38 degrees men, dying of thirst. The only drink that they bought for four days was beer. No water. No soft drink. Just beer. This is humor, he's viewing into just sort of terrible parents and it's not. It got worse. The spot they chose to set up camp was downwind of a dead buffalo. I still, my thi thick, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no shade, no, no, thi. thi. thi. thi, no shade, no shade, no shade, no shade, thi. thi, no shade thi, no shade thi. thi, no shade thi, no shade thi, no shade thi, no shade thi, no shade thi, no shade thi, no shade, no shade, no shade, no shade, no shade, no shade, no shade, thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thirty, thirty, thirty, thirty, thirty, thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty got worse. The spot they chose to set up camp was downwind of a dead buffalo. I still feel sick think of that smell. Day two, a ranger shows up to announce that we are meters from a crocodile nest. Of course we didn't move or leave. The only reason we got water was because they had bags of ice to keep the beer cold. Cheers Vicki. Oh my God Vickie. bags of ice to keep the beer cold. Cheers, Vicky. Oh my God, Vicky it.
Starting point is 00:10:27 Are you allowed to drink bags of ice? Well, I think, desperate times, desperate measures really. Better than a buffalo carcass and a bar and a beer or something. Oh, that is bad, in it. Yeah. The sun's so hot here. I think it's a different one. I think they've got their own one. You want to hear this is a good one? Hey, Josh and Roll. Thanks for being my favourite sexy duo, even though I'm 26, childless, and some British references go right over my head as a Sydney Australia dweller. Rob, this is exactly the kind of person you go out for a drink with. In the 70s, my great-grandmother was babysitting my uncle and mum. She disapproved of my uncle's middle name.
Starting point is 00:11:07 So one day, took him to the city hall and had his middle name legally changed without telling his parents. No. Laura from Sydney. That is incredible, isn't it? That is bananas. I've to tell you about my friend. I've got to be quite delicate with this. I've still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still still the story story story story story story story story story story story story story story story story story story story story story story story story story story story story, you the story, you've the story, the story story the story, the story, the story, the story, the story, the story, the story, the story, the story, the story, the story, the story, the story, the story, the story, the story the story the story the story the story the story the story the story the story the story the story the story the story the story,. I've got to be quite delicate with this.
Starting point is 00:11:25 I've got to try and change it slightly so it's still, you get the story about it been too obvious to it is. My friend's parents looked after their child and dropped him back at the house, dropped him back at the home. Yeah. And then they'd taken him to get his first haircut. No. Oh my word. What have you changed? That's all I think. Not enough. Not enough.
Starting point is 00:11:52 Let's leave it that. Right, who we got? We have got an absolute parenting hell classic returning. If you haven't listened to the original episode with Tom Parry, go back and listen to it now. It was one of our great early episodes, a man absolutely at the end of his tether, or not even a man absolutely positive in the worst situation possible as an early month's parent.
Starting point is 00:12:17 We rejoin him two years later to see how he's doing. We need to say a bit of a warning Josh we talk a lot about Christmas and Father Christmas. Yes, so just be aware of... I wouldn't listen to this one with children. I wouldn't listen to this one with children. Hello and welcome to Parentonel for the second time Mr. Tom Harry and I'm very excited about this. Josh is excited he's gonna rub his hands together in a minute he does that sometimes. Talk about one of the most legendary episodes. I don't really remember it you know it's like I've had things I've said quoted back to
Starting point is 00:13:00 it feels like you know when you get hammered and you have one of those nights where you're blackout drunk and then the next two weeks of people reported it back to you. That's kind of how that record feels to me. Yeah. But people still say to be chicken beer because of the euros. Yeah, exactly that too. And it's Tom at the height of having a new baby. How far in do you reckon we were, Tom? I think it was like six or seven weeks. Six or seven weeks. And you were doing shifts all through
Starting point is 00:13:39 the night so your partner would have the baby to like 1 a.m. 2 a.m. and then you'd take over till the morning Yeah. And you was really excited about it and thought it was just normal and great was basically. Yeah. And you'd sit up all night with a baby on you watching the Da Vinci-Code and eating two Satsumas or something and drinking coffee. And you had your special coffee and water. the special coffee. Yeah. Before we do that, th, th, th, th, th, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, th th th th th thi tho tho thi thi thi thi tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, and tho, th th th tho, th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th is thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi that that, and that that, that that that that that that that that that that that that time, I suppose is the first question. Before we do that, could we ask what people quote back at you from that, Tom, as a reminder? But well, people just keep saying like, are you okay? It felt mad. And like, what was such a weird kind of juxtaposition? It was like, my wife and I thinking, we're nailing this. And like, we've really got this down. And then like an entire country telling us we're not.
Starting point is 00:14:31 People who I haven't spoken to since I was at school on face, but we're like, congrats on the baby. It's mad what you're doing. I'm spoken to you in 20 years. So that was kind of like a universal feedback, which we weren't quite expected really. I mean, we didn't change what we were doing. We definitely stuck to our guns. So how long did you stick to it? Or are you still stuck to it? I don't know, no, don't worry, we're not still stuck to it. We should just say, for the listeners, what's the intervening period been 18 runs do you think? Yeah yeah daughter is now two yeah was two at the end of
Starting point is 00:15:10 September. So about almost two years exactly yeah yeah just kind of a nice distance really to look back from. No we're obviously not still doing that but it does feel like we're kind of stuck in a sort of version of that but like a softer version of it oh Oh yes please. Yes please. Get his little face. I really realize I've never seen Josh happy until we started doing this podcast and people talk about difficulties of children and it's his only time he's really experiencing joy. A life driven by Charlotte. Yeah. That's kind of parenting summed up in a sentence isn't it really?
Starting point is 00:15:46 We still kind of have like a tag system I guess where we were with Jane's mom for the first kind of six months or so and then we got our own place which made a hell of a difference. I mean the one thing I didn't realize was just how amazing it is living with your mother-in-law for that first bit of time. Because like yeah, yeah, laundry, my God, like I hadn't even thought about laundry. And now I look back on that and think... So she did all the washing? She did all the washing? So she was washing your pants as well? Yeah, yeah, yeah, she was doing the lot. What a shift. Because like, I don't know how delicately to say this, Tom, but, this, th. this, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. to too. too. too. too. too. too. toee. too. toea. too. tha. tha. tha. tha, tha. know how delicately to say this, Tom, but I've spent some time and you can play football with you. I wouldn't want to wash your clothes. You're a big, sweaty man. I can't be insulted by that. It's the truth. Also, a man that doesn't wear pants. Well, I try
Starting point is 00:16:36 and reduce the load, you know. I've got Thelma's interest at heart, you know. Yeah, it's no pants just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just my jeans just just just just just just my jeans just just just just just just just my jeans just just just just my jeans, just my jeans, just the jeans, rubbing you can wash them. How often do you watch your jeans if you're not wearing pants? Because I don't really wash my jeans that often. No you're not supposed to wash him no that often. But yeah but you're supposed to be wearing pants and not having your bare ass on them. I only go Commando on on football days. you're getting quickly changed for a gig. Yeah, exactly. And I'm always surprised when it's just shorts off nothing else. What does Possible sound like for your business? It's having to spend to power your scale with no preset spending limit. Redefined possible with Business Platinum.
Starting point is 00:17:23 That's the powerful backing of American Express. Terms and Conditions apply. Visit Amex.C. slash Business Platinum. This episode is brought to you by Nesprasso. Elevate your morning coffee ritual. From the first sip of coffee in the morning to the on-the-go cop. Make every morning unforgettable with Nispresso. Discover a world of possibilities possibilities with or without milk. Visit Nispresso.c.c.c.a. to learn more or an espresso boutique near you. Anyway, back to the child. So how are you in a soft version?
Starting point is 00:17:57 You know you're supposed to freeze your jeans? Oh yeah? If you put genes in a freezer overnight, it kills as much bacteria as if you wash them. But you don't damage your jeans. Right. I do agree that, and the moment you start washing jeans, they never look the same. Yeah, totally agree. Anyway, I digress. But freeze your jeans. Put them in a carrier bag. Would you clear out a shelf in the freezer or you putting them on top of your hash browns? Yeah well we had a situation like this we had moths a
Starting point is 00:18:28 few years ago and anything that's been mothed you meant a freezer shove it in the freezer to kill all the moth eggs so we had a period where our freezer was like you know Linda McCartney sausages pizza and then like a scarf like just for like a few weeks. Yeah. Well get your jeans in there? Yeah, I will. I will do. Sort of, I bet it's nice as well. Like I would quite enjoy putting the one straight out the freezer, wouldn't you? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I quite like putting a wet tee shirt on that's just been put out to dry in the summer and I let it just dry my body. Oh yeah sexy. Keep talking. There's some people at home absolutely loving this. Sorry, what are we talking about moving out? My nipples go rock hard and I'm just lying in the sun.
Starting point is 00:19:15 So how are you, Tom, on a softer version of what you were living two years ago? We're still stuck in a kind of round-the-clock surveillance type situation whereby... Whereby, Groh's got her the the th ab a th ab ab ab ab ab ab ab th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, I, I, th, th, I, th, I, th, I, th, I, I, th, I, I, I, I, th, I th, I th, th th th thi, I th, I th, I'm th, I'm absolutely, I'm absolutely, I'm absolutely, I thom, I thi, I thi, I thi, I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th thi, thi, thi, thi, thri thin, thri' thin, the the thri thin, the thri the thrie thrie thi, th a kind of round-the-clock surveillance type situation whereby Gros's got her own room she's two, she's got a bed actually she's out the cot she's into the bed. Oh yeah a big day. Yeah huge day but we've got a double mattress on the floor next to Glow's bed and that's pretty much Jane's bed right so Jane is still sleeping in Glow time. That's like a prison conjugal visit? the the the the the to the the to the the to the the the the the the to the the the the the the the the the the the the to the to to to th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. to go to to th. She's to go too's too's too's too's too's too's too's too's to to to to to to to to to too's to too's too's to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. She's th. She's th. She's tho's tho's the. She's the. She's the. the. the. the. the. toooooooeses. tooes' tooes' too's two hours together, Jane and I, like there isn't on Glow Time. That's like a prison, conjugal vivid. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And even that two hours is dominated by we still have the video surveillance screen. Yeah, yeah. So there's
Starting point is 00:19:56 a mattress in the kid's room because she'll wake up in the night and want to come into bed. So rather than ever in the bed, your partner just lays the th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thi, thi, thin, th, th is still th is still th is still thi, thi, thi, is still thi, thi, th is still th is still thi, thin, thin, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thin, thin, is thin, thin, is thin, is still thin, is still thin, is still thin, is still thin, is still thin, is still thin, thin, the the thin, to thin, to thin, the thin, thin, the thin, the the thin, the your partner just lays on the floor next to their bed? Yeah, well Jane's still feeding basically, Jane's still breastfeeding. Right, okay. Jane's like a big exponent of breastfeeding and breastfeeding and it's really stundes in good stead but we're kind of getting to the time now where we're trying to drop feeds and wean and stuff like st stuff like that and stuff like that. Yeah. Oh god. Oh that. Oh that. Oh that. Oh that. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, okay. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, right, right. Oh, right. Oh, right. Oh, right. Oh, right. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, thi. Oh, th. Oh, th. th. thi's. th's. thi's. thr-I's. thr-I's. thr-I's thr-I's th sort of logistics of it, when they're older and stuff like that, isn't it, really, like with the breastfeeding, like in the middle of the night, they're going to want it in the middle of the night? That's the difficulty, is. Yeah. But, like, Jane's like a pro at the breastfeeding kind of information. She's got this woman, Emma, like we talk about her most days. How do you become a guru in breastfeeding? I mean, I don't know, but she's a fourth member, Tom.
Starting point is 00:20:47 You've got a daughter as well. Oh yeah, well yeah, of course, I mean, of course she's there as well, yeah. Does this mean, Tom, that you're in another room sleeping through in a double bed on? Ties on, he couldn't be living want the breastfeeding to carry on? Tears on, he couldn't be living a more different life. Well no, but the arrangement is that I have to have the video screen in there and it's on. So even though Jane's in with Glow, I still wake with them and listen and if they need me, Jane tells me. Right. So you're laying there awake when Jane's breastfeeding just in case? Most the the the the th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi times tom. tom. tomoome to toe toease tooomease tooes tooes. toe. toe. toe. toe. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to toe. Two toe. Two toe. Two toe. Two toe. Two toe. Two toe. toe. toe. toe. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. te. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. tea. te. te. tells me. So you're laying there awake when Jane's breastfeeding just in case? Most times yes. Okay. And then there's some kind of pivotal nights where I've slept through.
Starting point is 00:21:30 Yeah. And that never goes down well because like I come in and go, God, that was a good night wasn't. And Jay don't be like, no, it was not. no. that was not. No, Jane's never had the need So does she express breast meat into bottles as well for you to do? So no, Jane's never expressed so... Right. We've never had the need to really or the particular desire to. So our routine now is kind of like we take Glow to bed and then I say good night to them. Jane has about an hour and a half where she's kind of with glow, feeding her to sleep, and just rocking it to sleep, then she goes to sleep while I sort the house. Saw the house is good isn't it? Salt the house.
Starting point is 00:22:06 I love the house. I love sort the house. I'll salt the house. I'll salt the house. Oh, don't worry. I'll salt the house. I'll cast on. I know.
Starting point is 00:22:14 I'm not, I'm sorry, I'm to shine. I've sought the house. Yeah. Let's break down salt the house. Let's face it. Toys in the box. Yeah. Dishwasher. Wipe the sides if you let's not reduce it to just that. Well what is it? Come on. Break down you. You've sorted the house. You've just left them upstairs. How often does Jane come down you? th. You. You. th. th. to. to. the. to. to. the. to. the. to. the. the. to. the. to. the the the toy. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the house. the house. the the the house. the house. the house. the house. the house. the house. the house. the house. the house. the house. the house. the house. the house. the house. Let. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. fair. That is fair. Tom, I'm not having to go to you here. I'm a house sorter myself. Yeah. Oh yeah, I'm a fully-fledged, open house sort. I love to suggest the house sort. The good thing is Rose doesn't really enjoy the house sort, so I get to sort the house. Yeah. The kind of 7.30 p.m. house sort is an absolute win. Bringing order to chaos it feels good. It's the only time I feel in charge is when I'm sorting the house. Tell me through your first steps of sorting the house Tom you come downstairs, podcast on. Go through,
Starting point is 00:23:14 collect anything in the house that needs washing up, put it on the side, load the dishwasher, get the dishwasher, come back, wash the stuff the dishwasher, sure. Having the lovely time, and the stuff that can't go in the dishwasher, having a lovely time, you know, and then front room, toys away, stick the telly on. And then Jane comes down and says, have you wipe the sides and I go no, go back in and wipe the sides. Some days I can get away without wiping the sides, so. Just do mood lighting, put a few candles on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's your ruling on wiping the sides and you like, because, and to, and to, and to, and to, and to, and to, and to, and to, and to, and to, and to, and to, and to to the the to to the th. And, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and the the the the the the the the the their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, to to to to tooes, tooes, toye, tooes, toysysk, toye, toye, toye, toye, toye, their, their their, ruling on wiping the sides in your because we wipe the sides before bed every night and I did not bring that rule in. No, it's not my rule either. No, that seems a bit hard and fast. No, that seems a bit hard and fast. Our house goes through stages of sort of like, it's always pretty clean but then it can get away from us if we've just come back from somewhere and then we're gone a bit the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to th. to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th th thin a thi. thin' thin' thi's th thi's thrown a the the thrown thi. thi. thi' to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be the the the the rule, the rule, the rule, the rule, the rule, the rule, the rule, the rule, the rule, I I I I I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's, I's thin' thrown a thrown thrown thrown, thrown, thrown, thrown, thrown, thrown, thrown, thrown, thrown, thrown, thrown, the the thrown,'s not really a hard and farthral but if I do wipe the sides Lou will probably do it again better right yeah but I was quite happy
Starting point is 00:24:07 with the level that I did it at yeah I'm accused of doing my wipes are too light and normally using the washing up water that I've just used to have the house we don't got any antibacterial spray Tom come on mate there there there there so so yeah so we have like the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th I I th I th is is th is th is th is th is th is the was the I the I the I the I toy. I was toy. I was toy. I was tipe. I tipe. I was tip. I was the. I was the. I was the. I was the I was the. I'm sure. So yeah so we have like two hours there where I've sorted the house we'll kind of go over the day sometimes we'll try to be romantic and yeah the screen stays on which is kind of I find an issue. So is the screen on like if you're trying to be whole time yeah doesn't it flick on when she wakes up the the setting thi thii waked on the setting the setting the setting to to to th I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the screen screen screen screen screen screen screen the screen the screen the screen the screen the screen the screen the screen the screen screen the the the screen the the screen the the screen the screen the the screen the screen the screen has to be that the screen's on. You can't even turn it off so it flicks on. So is that when you're downstairs? Even when we're upstairs as well? How big's your ass? Tiny. Two up, two down. All right. So you have a bit of tell time, watch a bit of tell and then you go to bed? try and be a bit earlier than thier thin thier thin thin. thin. What th. What th. What tom. What tom. What tom. What tom. What tom. What thea? What, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what? What's the time? What is. What, what's the time? What's the time, the time, th, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the, and what, and what? What, and what? What, and what? What, and what? What, and what? What, and, and what? What, what? What, what? What, what? What, what? What, what? What, what? What, what? What tie? What tie? What tie? What tie? What thi. What the time? thea? the time? thea? the time, the time, the time, the time, the time, the time, the time, thi. thi. the time, thi. What's than that, yeah. And then the screen's on still. Am I sensing you're quite anti-screen? I'm anti-screen. I'm anti-screen and I'm anti-grow egg. The grow eggs still dominate our house. What's a grow egg? You know those eggs that tell you the
Starting point is 00:25:14 temperature? No? Well I had a screen that the temperature on the screen on the screen. Yeah, yeah that that that that that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's the temperature that's the temperature the temperature the temperature the temperature that's the temperature that's the temperature the temperature that's the temperature the temperature the temperature the temperature the temperature the temperature the temperature the the the temperature is the temperature is the temperature the the the the the temperature the temperature the temperature the temperature the temperature the temperature the temperature the temperature the temperature the temperature on the temperature is the temperature is on the temperature on the temperature on the temperature on the temperature on the temperature on the temperature on the temperature on the temperature on the temperature on the temperature on the temperature on the temperature on the temperature on the temperature on the temperature on the temperature at the temperature at the temperature at the temperature at the temperature at the temperature at the temperature at the temperature at the temperature. the temperature. the temperature. the temperature. the temperature. the temperature. the temperature. the temperature. the temperature. the temperature. the temperature. the temperature. the temperature. the temperature. the temperature. the temperature. Rose is obsessed with the temperature. Temperature dominates conversations. Temperature combined with thickness of the sleeping bag. Yes, and pajamas. All the time. Such a difficult time. I mean, you know, I know Global Warming's fucking the planet, but most of all is fucky with our routines and what we're planning on to wear at night. Because the arguments are no heat in loads of layers, but then the room looks too cold,
Starting point is 00:25:48 but then you worry that they're getting too hot. But if you have the radiate that are on and then they're in less clothes, the radiate is going to go off at certain point. Oh, it's so difficult. Can I make a confession? Go on. Go on. I still don't th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho the the tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho the the the the the the room the the tho the tho the th. tho th. tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho the the the to to to to to to to toooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo the. tho the. the temperature numbers mean. I never know what temperature is good or bad. I mean that in a day time. When someone goes it's 27 outside today, I go, I don't know what the temperatures mean. I thought I knew until like in a hotel room, if I've got it on 20 degrees or 19 degrees, I'm freezing cold, but I've been outside in 90 degrees, getting sun burnt in my top off. Yeah, I don't understand well as a cold 19 and a hot 19. And then Rose's mom turns up and uses the other numbering system. Oh, well like 78? No.
Starting point is 00:26:32 Farinite! Yeah, it's like... Where's she come from? Where's Faraday come from? Oh, she's from the past, isn't she? She's from the past? You had to stop himself saying old and then said the pass. Put the heating on it, it'll only cost a few shilling. Okay, so you got up to bed about nine-ish then half nine and ten, screens on. So you lit all night on? The biggest issue is when, you know, if we're trying to be romantic, the screen still stays on. Oh no. Oh no. That's the biggest issue for me. What, the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the kind the the big the big the kind the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the big. The the big. The the big. The the big. The the the the the the the the big the the the the the big the big th. th. th. th. things. things. things. things. things. things. th. th. th. the screen still stays on. Oh no! That's the biggest issue for me.
Starting point is 00:27:06 What the kind of light bouncing off your bodies? Is there just knowing that you know there's a there's your daughter on screen just over there you don't need that in your head? Yeah no. But then also if you turn it off you'll be able to hear her if she makes some noise. Yeah I mean we'd be able to hear if we didn't have the screen the screen the screen the screen the screen the screen the screen the screen the screen the screen the screen the screen the screen the screen the screen to the screen the screen the screen to the screen the screen the screen to the screen the screen to the screen the screen the screen to to the screen to to to to to the screen. to to to to to to to to to to to the screen. It's to to to their. It's to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the screen. It the screen. It the screen. It the screen. It the screen. It's the screen. It's the screen. It's the screen. It's the screen. It's the screen. It's the screen. It's the screen. It's the the the the the the their. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's the to. It's didn't have the screen. Yes. It's a two-up-two-down, Terry's house. You know, she's not in the West Wing. She's just literally there. Yes. When you're getting romantic to use your terminology, do you turn the screen
Starting point is 00:27:35 round? Like turn it away from you? I do. I turn it away and then Jane if she gets the chance turns it back and we have a merry dance No, no. Is that what you call it? Yeah, it's kind of imperative to Jane that the screens right there at all times and I do I do find it off putting.
Starting point is 00:27:54 I would too. I do. Yeah, no. It's a weird sort of fuzz thuze as well as it's a grainy blacker white. I I I I I I I. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. that's that's that's that's thi. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. that's that's what thi. thi. thi. the the thaa. that's why, it's a fuzzy grainy. It looks like a horror film doesn't it? Yeah, that's the brother. It looks like something bad is going to happen. Yeah. And then, you know, after about half an hour of that, Jane goes to bed and goes into the room, it goes on the double mattress on the floor in anticipation of if Glow wakes up in the night....... the night the night the night the night the night the night the night the night the night the night the night th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It looks like th. It looks like th. It looks like thi thi that's that's that's like that's like that's like that's like, it looks like, it looks like, it looks like, it looks like, it looks like, it looks like, it looks like, it looks like, it looks like, it looks, th...... It's th.. It's th.. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's like, th. It's like, th. It's like, th. It's like, th. It's like, th. It's like, thi. It's like, the. It looks like, thi. It looks like, the. It's like, romantic every night? No, no, no. So you have a bit of time? That's a bit wrong fiens. Half an hour every night?
Starting point is 00:28:31 Okay, but you're just in the bed together for a bit. For a bit. And does, will she go asleep until the baby cries or just go in there by habit? At the moment, goes in there by habit? At the moment goes in there by habit right because then she can just get as much sleep as possible and has to do as little as possible when yeah that that six-second commute would really disrupt the apple cart if she fell asleep in her own bed. Look it's very important that I have that king-sized bed to my sa- I'm just sorted the house from I'm naked. He's knackered. He's having make love for 30 minutes every night. He's exhausted. And then you sort of wake up with them if they wake up, even though you're not doing
Starting point is 00:29:11 anything. Yeah, moral support. Even though I'm not doing anything. Yeah. Sounds like a bit of a hangover from when the baby was really little kind of thing, like that sort of routine of ill. I think so. Well, I think also we're just getting to think so. Well I think also we just get into the stage, we're kind of at a stage where we think it's about to all change really. I'm glad we got in now. I wouldn't want to have interviewed you in two months. Yeah. We're right at this stage where we're weaning and trying to make that kind of work and dropping dropping naps as well in the afternoon nap and it's kind of like, so it's a state of flux. I thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thirty. thirty. thirty. thirty. thirty. thirty. thirty. wea. wea. we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we' we'er. I'er. I'er. I'er. I'er. I'er. I'er. I'er. I'er. I'er. I'er. I'er. I'er. I'er. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm thin' th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm thrown. I'm thrown. I'm thrown. I'm of like so it's a state of flux but I think once we get through those then we'll be home and dry but the biggest step will be moving the mattress out of all the yeah that's one of the big questions where's the mattress going where do you put a mattress yeah I think you have to get that professionally removed or go down the dump then you've got to start like cell a roof to the roof it's to to to to to to to the roof it's to the roof. to the roof roof roof roof. to to the the the roof. I I I I to to the the the roof. It's to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the to the the to the the the to to the the to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the try. I I I'm. I'm try. I'm try. I'll try. I'll try. I'll try. I'll try. I'll the the the the the to take to the dump, not just your house. Yeah, try to just leave it up there, like a booby truck. Like a solar panel.
Starting point is 00:30:10 And how long, because you said you're into the breastfeeding, is it Emma Pickett, you'd say? She's the guru. How long you breastfeeding for? What's the plan? What's the plan? Because we struggled to breastfeeding, but, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, because, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, their, their, their, their, their, their, the, like, their, their, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, the, the, the, the, they. Like, they. Like, they. they. they. they. they. they. they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they. to breast feed for? Well, until you both feel like you want to stop, really. Like I said, we're huge fans of the breastfeeding it. And like Jane's done a lot of reading around it. And I mean, like the connection they have because of it. And like the time that they spend together doing it, Jane really cherishes. and like I understand that. Have you read as well that breast milk has like antiseptic qualities and stuff so sometimes if I have like a rash or
Starting point is 00:30:48 something, Jay puts her breast milk on my rash and it cleans it up. Really? Yeah. Have you tasted the milk as well? I bet you have a bit of a taste. A little bit yeah. Yeah you can have a little bit of taste. How much half a point or a shot? Just a two hour feed. What was it like the breast milk? It's kind of like when you have like a soy or almond you know like it's not great but it'll do. It's got a funny kind of sweetness to it but it's all right. It'd make a cup of tea go cloudy. Yeah exactly. Exactly you'd be getting all like the bits flowing on the top sort of thing. Yes sure. Best of just rub it's all right. It'd make a cup of tea go cloudy. Yeah, exactly. You'd be getting all like the bits floating on the top sort of thing. Yes, sure. Best of just rub it on your ashes, isn't it? Yeah, yeah, there you go. Because some people breastfeed for like years, like
Starting point is 00:31:32 four or five years, but I don't know what the sort of hardcore breastfeeders say, or it is like, you just get to a point where to where to just just just just to just to to to to to the point where where to to the point where the point where to the point where the point where the point where to the the the the the to the to the the to to to to the to the to the the to the the the the to just, the to just, their their their their their their their, their their, just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. to threat, to thrue, thrue, throooooooooooooo, their th. to to to to the to to the the the thrue, they. the to the point where it starts to feel natural for them to move on and they kind of feel that way as well. And now like part of it is like it's not necessity anymore but it's kind of like, and it's kind of like comfort, yeah. Yeah, and it's an enjoyable way for them to spend like they stick the telly on and do like 45 minutes or something in the afternoon. But like what we're looking at it is like because of brf. Because the the their their their their their their their. Because because because because because because because because of b. Because of b. Because of b. Because of b. Because of b. Because of b. Because of b. Because of b. It's a the their. It's a their. It's a their. It's not. It's their. It's not. It's not, like, like, like, like, like, like, their. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's their. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not, it. It's not, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the again. Right. Because it inhibits that. So in terms of like planning for you know say if we wanted more which we kind of talk about then at some point we're gonna have to look at dropping the best feed. That's interesting. That's one of the main reasons to be honest because at the moment Jane is full-time mom. Yeah. Glow's not going to go to preschool for another eight months or so so so so so so so so so so so so. So. So. So. So. the the. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. thi. the. the. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to say, to say, to say, to say, to say, to to to to to th. th. th. th. the, the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the the. the the the the the the the. the the the the. the the. toe. toe. to say, say, say, say, say, say, to not going to go to preschool for another eight months or so. So there's no real need to stop. Yes. And the only reason is because it's inhibited Jane having her periods back, which Jane, it
Starting point is 00:32:31 loves. Like she's like, it's amazing. She's on this huge menstrual holiday. She's kind of like living this dream. Yeah. That's your next film, isn't it, the thanks, isn't, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to me, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their....... their...... their. their.. their. their. their. their. thin. thin. th th th th th to. toooooooooooooooooo. toe. toe. toe. toe. the the the th the the th th th th th th th th th think the cutoff should be if the baby can undo the bra and then do it back up again. That kind of dexterity I think you'd have to go, I reckon we've had enough. Yeah, I'll flick on the clasp. Yeah, like just flicked it off.
Starting point is 00:32:54 Like a pick up artist from the 90s. This is how you're doing, lads. I mean, my daughter's very subtle, but she think she's very skillful at it at at at at at's very skillful at doing stuff like that, like when we say like, oh you can't have a feed until, because we're trying to kind of reduce. And then she like kind of goes, oh mommy, can I just look at your um, boob, please? And like Jane'll be like, the feed. It was your chat line originally though with James, wasn't it? Yeah, yeah, I made you to chip off the old block. Yeah, I'm very proud. a beer and the perfect pairing for your game time. When Miller Light set out to brew a light beer, they had to choose great taste or 90 calories per can. They chose both because they knew the best part of beer is the beer. Your game time tasks like Miller time. Learn more
Starting point is 00:33:59 at Miller.C.A. Must be Legal Drinking Age. Josh mentioned a mens re-holiday in X film because we should talk about your current film. It's coming out for Christmas. Yes. I'm so excited about this, Tom. I'm a huge Christmas film fan. I'm a fan of you. So this is, this is big. I love a Christmas film. I've always kind of, it's the, but they're the best type of films. So yeah, I've written a Christmas film called Your Christmas or mine and it's on Amazon Prime. It'll be on Prime video on the 2nd of December. Oh, Your Christmas or mine. Yeah. What's the premise? It's um... I've asked you, but I know the premise and it's a great premise. It's like these two students who have just fallen in love and they're in a same time just after they said goodbye they both think, do you know what fuck it I'm gonna go and spend Christmas with the person who I love and they cross in the train station get on each of their's trains
Starting point is 00:34:50 and end up at each other's family homes for Christmas. Oh that's a great idea. Yeah there's like a huge snowfall no transport and they're off on the doorstep to surprise them and they're, oh yes, I'll buzz that, that is good. That is really great. And it's got Daniel Mays in it, is that correct? It's got Daniel Mays in it, it's got Aes of Mays in it, he's got Ayes of Butterfield from sex educations in it, Harriet Walters in it, David Bradley from the Crown. Yeah, and Ram John Holder who was pork pie in Desmond's. Yeah. Pork pie's in it, he plays the Granddad. He's still alive. He's still alive, mate. He's amazing. We'll be a coarse bit of casting if he was dead.
Starting point is 00:35:38 Very Christmas, he's that bloke in the corner. Yeah, amazing bloke. Yeah, he's on set, singing and dancing every day. He's amazing guy. And who are the romantic Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah..... Yeah. Yeah..... Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.ke, yeah. He's on set singing and dancing every day. He's an amazing guy. And who are the romantic leads? Yeah, so it's Ace of Butterfield, who's from sex education, and then Cora Kirk, who's a newcomer. It's kind of like her first big role. So I think she's gonna be kind of like the breakout stars.
Starting point is 00:35:57 Ah, brilliant. That's so good. So excited then. So excited, yeah. I mean, it's a weird feeling because we finished it just in time for last Christmas, weirdly, but you know, they can't put it out. Oh, yeah, they have to just wait another year. Yeah, so I've just been sitting on it for a year, really. Was it one of those things, like, you know, and was it like you were doing it in the middle of summer, but you're doing a Christmas film? Yeah, we filmed it in August. Obviously, like every exterior shot is a snowstorm.
Starting point is 00:36:30 So there's this company called Snow Business. And it's their job year round to kind of make it snow on screen. So they rock up with like snow machines and white carpets and all that kind of gubbins and make it snow. Amazing. So we were there in the middle of August. That must have been brilliant, wasn't it? Yeah. And there's like, you know, big cranes blocking out the sun. Mental. It was absolutely mental. Are you Mr. Burns?
Starting point is 00:36:54 I know. It must be amazing being on set knowing that you've written all this and seen it all. mad. Weirdly on set you're also the least useful member of the crew and like a writer on set you're just getting in the way you're walking around being like yeah is there anything I can do you want to change a line and they're like no no it's fine we're doing it now and you're like okay you just kind of go and sit by catering and then yeah it's an amazing feeling. Amazing feeling. Yeah it's an amazing feeling I was like I have not slept thus th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus thus that thi the thus thus. thi. thi. Yeah thi. Yeah the they. Yeah they. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm. Yeah. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm th. I'm th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm th. I lovely time. We're doing night shoot and things like that, and everyone was like, God, I'm naked, and I was like, I have not slept this well in ages.
Starting point is 00:37:29 How were we away for doing it? How did that work with parenting? It was a six-week shoot, but the weekends were off pretty much, so I was back at weekends, so it wasn't too bad. The only bad one was when there was a night shoot I think and we filmed from seven in the evening till five in the morning and then I got in the car and drove three hours back to Exeter and that was like that was bad. A couple of sat sooemas at a coffee though to get you through the night. Yeah yeah yeah for the whole time's sake. Yeah and then you get back and then like like the the the the the the the the th glglglglglglglglglglglglglglglglglglglglglglglglow like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like like the like the like the like the like the the the the the the the the th th th th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the th. Yeah the the th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, th. I th. Yeah, th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. I th. I th. the the th. th. I the th. th. I th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. I the. I the. I th. I glow was just waking up and ready to go and then off you go. Oh my god. What are you filming from midnight to 5 a.m? Because it was August and we needed to shoot like when you're doing any kind of night scenes or any it has to look like the winter so you're doing most of the day most of it was like night shoots.
Starting point is 00:38:18 Oh my god. And what's your Christmas this year? Are you going to sit down and watch it as a family? Or what do you normally do at Christmas as well? This is the first Christmas because of all the COVID and stuff. We're going to take Gloria back to Walver for Christmas at her grandparents. So my mom's Welsh right? So she's nine. My dad's English. She's nine? Nine. Yeah, that's Welsh. That's Welsh for grandma. Right. In Wales you have a nine-and-in' th. So. th. th. their. th. th. th. their. their. th. their. th. th. their. their. their. their. their. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. their. C. C. th. C. th. th. toooooooo. C. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. C. their. C. C, okay. In Wales you have a nine and a tide, you don't have a granddad and a grandma. Right, I thought she was just starting early. She's nine. Blahmah. From the valleys. She's a little van. Yeah, she's Welsh, she's nine. Oh and then tides to granddad, yeah. Yeah, that's right, but Dad's English so he's not, he's grumped, so we've gramps and nine's a nine's a nine's a nine's a nine's a nine. Gramps and nine sounds like a rapper. Yeah. And then Jane's mom, Thelma spent about 10 years working out in Spain. So she's kind of got an affinity to Spain.
Starting point is 00:39:15 So when she found out that my mom was nine, she didn't want to just be like a nun. Sorry, I can't. It does sound like your mom's nine. Sorry, carry on. Sorry, carry on. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th, th, th, th. tha. tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, thu's tham's tham's tha, tha, tha, tha, tham. So, tham. So, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha, tha. So, tha. So, tha. So, tha, tha, tha. So, tha, tha, tha. So, tha, tha, tha. So, tha. So, tha. So, tha. So, tha'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a. So, th nine. Sorry, carry on, carry on. So Thelma decided she wanted to be a bwella? Abuela. Yeah. So Gloria's got a, she's got a nine and she's got an abuela.
Starting point is 00:39:34 Aboella? Yeah. And where are you spending Christmas at 9 and Gramsys' house, but we're taking Abuela with? Abuela's coming with? And. Abuela's coming with? Yeah. Abuela's coming with. And as Abuela hung out with nine and grams before? Yeah, that's all fine.
Starting point is 00:39:51 That's all fine. I would say though, it's quite bold to just demand what you're going to be called and it's Spanish. Just because your equivalent has got an interesting name because it's an interesting choice. Let's just say that. Sorry. And Abuela is a very difficult word to say, so Glo says bar. She's just clung on to the end of it, so instead of Abuela, it's just bar. And she's too young to explain to her as well, isn't she? Yeah, I mean, it's hard to explain it to people who aren't young, do you know what I mean? Well she once worked in Spain for a bit, okay.
Starting point is 00:40:28 Is she Spanish? Nah, no, no, no, absolutely. My father-in-law, Lou's elder sister used to call their granddad amps because they couldn't say gramps or granddad. So then now the grandkids call their dad amps. There you go. And then I always say Lou Lou Lou, Lou, Lou, Lou, Lou, Lou, Lou, Lou, Lou, Lou, Lou, Lou, Lou, Lou, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I'm th, I'm th, I'm th, I'm th, I'm th, I'm th, I'm th, I th, I th, I'm th, I'm th, I th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th that that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that that tha tha tha tha tha tha th now the grandkids call their dad Amps there you go and then I always saw Nanny and Granddad and then it's all confused and I was like look I'm not calling him Amps thee you gotta get on board that's fine if the kids do it but I'm not saying I'll say Mick I'm not as a grown man to another grown man sent amps would you like a cup of tea bar Bar, yeah, I call a bar now. Hello bar.
Starting point is 00:41:08 Not even her name? Come on bar, yeah. Bar's coming round now. Bar sounds more Welsh for a Nan than nine. Yeah. It does, yeah. So which one's Spanish? Neither, don't get bogged down by now.
Starting point is 00:41:21 No one's Spanish. Bar, not bar, nine. Nine, but she German? Nine, no, no. I'm going to... It's like a Michael McIntyre too. So you're all going up there to your whoever lives there in Wal-Rans and whatever they're called. Yeah, we're going to 9 and Gramps want to rebrand? No, Gramps's out there. Quite easy life, no problem.
Starting point is 00:41:46 Yeah, it's big. How many kids are going to be there? Is it going to be loads and loads of kids? Glow's got nine cousins, I think. Oh, that's confusing. That's a confusing number to throw into the name mix, isn't it? Okay, let's have you nine over here for the photo, no not you nine. Are you nine. Yeah, so like nine cousins and so you know it's gonna be good for them. Off they go. Oh wow. Are they all going to be calling a Boilela? No, they know as thou maybe. I think it'd be weird if they hopped on the bar train. It's already a weird train to be on. Just what's standing room only on the bar train just for you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's just for us. That's just for us. How big you're, it's your nine and granddad's house? Is it a big house? Are you're going? Are you you you you you you you you you you you th going? Are you th going? Are you th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. thin? It's thi? It's already th. It's already th. It minutes of my mom and dad's house. Right, okay, so that's fine. You know,
Starting point is 00:42:47 like I didn't really realize when as soon as I got older, I left and was like, this is what you do, you know, you leave home, you go and you to thrown, you know, the other brothers and their brothers and sisters live, they're just me down in, their, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, thrown, thrown, thr, that, thr, thr, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, that, thr, thr, throoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo, th, th, th, th, th, th, th's the problem isn't it? When everyone goes home, a lot of people like you have, and they go home and they've got two children or three children or a child with them, and they're in like their childhood bedroom that is only really suitable for a 15-year-old in 1997. And all of a sudden, there's a family in there. Under a post of Carmen Electra. Yeah, Carmen Electra is looking down, looking at you and I know what you used to do in here big boy. And then and then it's hard for the other person who's it's not their family because their Christmas now is in sort of a strange person's house essentially I know
Starting point is 00:43:33 just sleeping on a weird bed. Yeah yeah exactly it'll be chaos but that's what it's all about it's what it's all about and then I mean I don't know what what we're going to get her for Christmas? I feel like... At two. It's the first Christmas where she knows it's Christmas. She's already started talking about it. But you don't need to get her that much because yeah. Loads of people or buy a loads of stuff and you'll end up with loads of stuff and she doesn't know that lots of things are bought for Christmas. This is the advice. This is the advice. This is the advice. This is the advice I the advice I their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.... Yes. Yes.. th. the the their. the th. their. the the the the th. the the the the the the th. the the the the th. the the the th. a present and then they're friends and family and then the parents buy some as well but we get one present from Father Christmas in our house. And a stocking. Okay here's a problem I've got coming down the pipe line.
Starting point is 00:44:14 Oh yeah. Oh what's that? You can't get an erection? About half an hour every evening. We've had a chat in the last two weeks tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha tha th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that. that. to thi. that. to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. thean. thea. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. thean. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. chat in the last two weeks. Should we be putting out a warning about this if this is about Father Christmas? Oh yes we should, yes. We should put out a warning about it. Okay, if you're listening to children, we're about to discuss Father Christmas. Yeah, and that's enough warning. My wife's decided she doesn't want to...
Starting point is 00:44:41 I love it if you had, she reckons he's not real. She doesn't want to go with the lie. She doesn't want to, oh really? Yeah. Okay, interesting. Oh, this is big. Do you? Yeah. Yeah, she doesn't want to go with the lie.
Starting point is 00:44:57 And actually, when you come to defend the lie, you start to realize that it's fucking weird stance. Yeah, because the, she, she, she, she, she, the, you, they, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi, thi, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, thi. tho, tho, tho, tho. thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. tho. tho. th's fucking weird and you're taking a really weird stance. Yeah, because my youngest is scared of the thought of a man coming in her house. Yeah, here you go, why wouldn't she be? Yeah, exactly. So talk us through your... When you start saying there's this, well we're not religious, we don't want to say, oh, if you do good things, then Jesus will be pleased with you. That's not the way way way way way way way way way way. And Jane wants Glow to believe everything that we tell her because what we're telling it is the truth or things and you can trust us and what we tell you is real and we're her guide to what is and what isn't in life. And then you go apart from this one thing where we're going to tell you it's real. We're going to go out of our way to show you that it's real. And I ended up going, no, we've got to do that. And Jane's like, why?
Starting point is 00:45:47 Why are you going to do this one weird lie to our daughter? And I can't really find an answer to it. It's fun. When they see, mince. I just think I've never met anyone that's really troubled as an adult because of that life. No, you know what I mean? It's fun and I've never met anyone going there's fun and like I've been in counseling for years just because they lied about it. It's a fun, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:46:14 You've only found out he killed seven people. You're all in the Netflix documentary? Yeah, you're right. But I don't remember finding out that it wasn't true. I think you sort of clock it as a kid, but you don't really want to say it because you want to believe, I think it's what happens. And you want the presents. Yes. So, crucially, you still want the presents to come.
Starting point is 00:46:36 So you keep stum. Yes. So I sort of get it, I've thought it, I've th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that. that, I, I, I sort of, I sort of, I sort of, I sort of, I sort th. to, I sort of, I sort of, I sort of, I, I, so, so, so, I, so, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I. I, I, I, I, I. I, I, I, I, I, I, I. I, sort of. I, I, sort of. I, sort of. I, sort of. I, sort of. I, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, I'm, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, sort of, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've, I've thought about this, but I think it is so much fun and they love it and it's exciting. And the world is quite depressed and hard work. Let's not let them know about that early doors. I mean, you must. Well, here's one other argument. If she knows, at the age of four, when she's at school, if she knows, when she knows and no one else does at school. Does she keep that to herself or just she tell everyone at school? Well what I think we could be imbuing her with there is a sense of intellectual superiority ye. Yeah yeah I quite like that idea. Yeah because that won't damage him
Starting point is 00:47:14 will it? Just instilling a superiority over everyone at an early age. She's sat there and nurse thinking Susan you're best friend, but you're a fucking idiot actually. Yeah. Who's calling a baby Susan these days, Tom? Come on. Look, Susan, you need to know the truth, okay? You're a pathetic little baby, believe it a lie, right? We're 15 now, right? I'm going home for a bit of breast milk, or we're back to do my GCSE. I do get it though but yeah it is a balance in it so what side are you on of this Tom? I'm team Father Christmas. It feels mad to me if I'm going to try and get into an industry
Starting point is 00:47:52 where I'm cranking out a Christmas film every year. Being the truth guy. I can't kill our father Christmas guy. She'll say look that's going to pay our mortgage for the next five years. You gotta keep the's going to pay our mortgage for the next five years. You've got to keep saying to relax. If people stop watching Christmas films. It's closing off my ideas. But that could be your Christmas film, Tom. It's about the man that writes Christmas but has no love for Christmas. In his own house. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:48:14 You're like something from a fairy tale. I'm concerned about this. I don't think think. I don't think. I don't th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. that. that. that. that. thi. thi. that's, I that's, I that's, I that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. to to. to. to. to. It. It. It. It. It. to. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. to. to. to. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. to win the argument basically. Right, okay. I think once it happens very early on, well once you've lost the argument, it's very difficult to put the genie back in the bottle, isn't it? Yes. You gotta go, he is real actually. Bye, good night. Well, you've got to be careful though, because you can't, if you She'll go in this Christmas to all her cousins or complazing. I get a feeling though when she grows up she'll just be
Starting point is 00:48:48 that kid that goes well my parents told me at the age of two so I never knew and then she might get annoyed she missed out. Oh God it's a tough one. It's hard isn't it? It's really tricky. Oh do your kids still believe Rob. Yeah, but like I don't really hammer it home. Yeah, introduce Young and we go and visit Father Christmas at things. And then it's sort of like, should we see if he's been but it's not like a, I don't really mention that he's real. I just don't really mention that he's not. Yeah, but you put the minced pies out. Yeah, we put the mince pies out. Yeah, so obviously around Christmas we do. Yeah, but it's not like like like like like. I I I I I obviously, I obviously, I I obviously, I that. that. that. that. Obviously, obviously, obviously, obviously, obviously, obviously, I that. that. that that that that that that that that that that that that th. Obviously, obviously, obviously, obviously, obviously, obviously, obviously, obviously, obviously, obviously, I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th th. th th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the you're good. Oh yeah I don't like that. I totally don't do that at all. That's not even a part of it. We just sort of say if you know like sometimes Father Christmas will bring a present yeah at Christmas. How do you get them to do what you ask though because
Starting point is 00:49:35 that's the stage over now. Asking for a friend? I mean I'll be honest with you. I mean I'll the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I'll th. I'll the th. I'll the th. I'll th. I'll th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that's that's that's that's that's that's. that's that's that's that's to to that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. that's. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I'm. I'm. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th. I's th. I'm th. I mean I'll be honest with you maybe when I'm under pressure I might go Christmas is coming up soon and I've not hammered it home. Yeah there you go. I've just said that and it's up to them. You can leave that there. To read into that however much they want okay. Yeah. That's on them. Glory is really like that's the age she's out now where she's really learned to say no. Yeah, and we haven't quite got our discipline ducks in a row yet. Oh yeah, the discipline ducks are tough to get... Oh, the discipline ducks, yeah, she believes in the discipline ducks. That's a...
Starting point is 00:50:10 That's a... If you don't come to the table, the discipline ducks are gonna come and peck you. I don't know what to do and she's really good now to say no like she eyeballed me in the day. I said don't throw your food and she eyeballed me and through food and just kept on looking at me the whole time. That is a tough age. That's the two's isn't it?
Starting point is 00:50:40 And you said, can I hear quacking in the distance here they can. Whack quack! This is the thing from down. Yeah, yeah, yeah, flapping out there pecking us. It's what we had in our house for the last, it's just come to an end luckily but about four months ago we were really happy everyone's having a nice time. We went for lunch with another family who were about a street away and they they had a filter water right and they had and they had and they had and they had and they had they had they had they had they had they had they had they had they had they they they they were. they they were they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they had a their their their their their their fared. their fared. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. they had had had had had had had had had had had had had had had had had had had had had had had had had had had had had. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. they had their they had their their their their their their they had their they had their. they had they had they had they had filter. they had filter. they had filter. they had filter. they had filter. they had filter, why have you got filter water? And they said, oh, there's a lot of lead pipes in this area. Didn't you know? We were like, no, we don't know. So we went back to our house and Jane ordered a lead test and we had lead pipes in our street bringing the water to our house. And in our house we had lead pipes that our surveyed, right? Oh, right. So we had like a big freak out. Jane in particular was very upset
Starting point is 00:51:25 because she was like, we've been damaging our child. And I kind of, you know, I think like in any relationship, there's like I tend to down play things and go, it'll be okay, even though I don't really know, it'll be okay. I find myself going, water it's fine. We'll get filter from now on. So we went on bottled water until we sorted all out I know we've had all the pipes fitted but fucking out honestly like looking into it there's still so much led pipes in Britain. Really? Yeah and the acceptable levels like Jay
Starting point is 00:51:54 did a whole lot of research it's like the acceptable levels in this country are 10 so as long as you've got under 10 in your water they say it's fine, but the medical associations around the world say five is the acceptable limit before it causes damage. So Britain is like five behind the rest of the world. Right. Because it just goes, oh no, it'll be fine and it isn't. So like we've had a whole thing about lead. But the thing about lead, again, through research is all the symptoms of lead poisoning are all exactly the same symptoms of a toddler turning two. So like we found out, like we found out about the lead stuff just as going into the terrible twos and like having the odd tantrum and like getting upset and all that kind of stuff. And then like when you read like lead poison it's like,
Starting point is 00:52:37 oh can display violent behavior, we'll start peeing irrational. So like our battle in the house has always been, is it lead????????...... the lead?? the lead? the lead? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? the lead? Like, the lead? Like, the lead? Like, the lead? the lead? Like, the lead? Like, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the lead? the lead? the the the the the the the the the the the the the the lead? the the the lead? the the the lead? the lead? Like, the lead? Like, the lead? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like? Like, the the the the the lead? Like, the the to? Like, to? Like, to? Like, to? to? tod? to? todd? Like, to? to? to? th. th. the the the been is it lead or is it? Is it that she's two? So like she'll throw her foods and Jayla look at me and go it's the lead and I'll be like no no she's two she's two she's two she's two she's two she's two she'll be coming in after nights out off her face going, oh she's been drinking the water again. Yeah, yeah, it's the lead.
Starting point is 00:53:10 So we had her tested and everything and her levels were really very, very low so we're okay. we got away with it but like... It's just her behavior in your parenting. It is just that she's a toddler. But that has been the constant discussion is like, is it the lead? Is it the lead? That's so good. Is it the lead or is it that? She's too, yeah. Oh, there's going to be so many paranoid people now going straight to lead testing their water. I cannot, I cannot stress enough. It's mad. It's mad. How do you check it in
Starting point is 00:53:36 they send you? You're just drinking if fillings it in three days and if you punch someone at the end of it it's probably lead. Can you plead it in court? Yeah, I mean, genuinely that is a strong theory that like people in poor social housing, especially like a hundred years ago had nothing but lead water in their supplies and it does genuinely lead to violent tendencies. So there is like a whole theory behind it. We've all done a lot of reading on lead, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:54:06 Maybe it's an ex-Christmas film, there. Lead-based. Well, that's what happens in this one. One of the families has got lead in their water, and you have to work out which one. Yeah, it turns it to catch up. I loved it. Lovely to be back on, guys. Lovely to be back on. What's the name of the film again? It's called Your Christmas or Mine. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:54:28 And it's on Prime Video on the 2nd of December. I can't wait to watch it. So does that mean I get it for free if I've got Amazon Prime? Yeah, it'll be on their home pagea for the season. Yeah, and the soundtracks out now as well on Amazon music. It's got an original soundtrack of... Is it on Spotify, Tom? Oh no, it isn't. No. The sound tracks out there if you want to find it somewhere. It doesn't sound like it's worth listening to to me, but there we go. Cheers, Tom. We've asked that question before about the best of them. Oh no, because we asked you about what the, did we ask you about what Jane does that, did, did we ask you about what Jane does about what Jane does? Because now we've added a question
Starting point is 00:55:11 of what amazing thing does she do? Not her, not her, but the partner. We don't ask you that before the thing that annoys you about the thing that annoys, th you, th you, th you, th you, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the, th, th, the, the, the, th, th, th, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, did, the, they me me. Did they me. Did they me. Did we they me, they me, they me, they me, they me, theything that annoys me is her, I mean I know it's it's so I would say it's probably one of the things that makes her such a good parent as well though is like the surveillance the level of like never relaxing yeah like I'd love her to be able to relax a bit more but I also know that's part of what what makes her such a ta to to to to to to to to to to be a to be a to be a to be a to be a constant kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind kind I'm a to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to the the to to the the the the the the the th the the the the the the the the try to to the to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the to the That was the best thing, Tom. I mean, her best thing, and it's always been the way when I first met Jane in normal life is like empathy. Her empathy for Glow is like when Glow's freaking out, she never gets cross with that.
Starting point is 00:55:58 She just understands why she's freaking out. And it's like she's not misbehaving, it's because she's just trying to communicate with us and it makes us such a she kind of diffuses any situation by being able to be empathetic with Glow I'm in awe of that because I kind of I start to try and think right I should be telling someone off here because she's doing that I've got to tell her off on the dad and then Jane will step in and just start talking to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the to the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I I I I tr. I try. I try. I try. I true and I true and I true and I true and I try. I tell. I tell. I th. I'm th. I'm tell. I'm the dad and then Jane will step in and just start talking to Gloria and being like I understand you're upset and this is probably why you're frustrating and empathizing with her instead before you know it like everyone's really happy and I'm always like wow that's that's pretty amazing that you can do that's a nice. Oh that's lovely. Oh thanks someone good luck with the film.
Starting point is 00:56:39 Cheers boys. Oh, thanks for having me back on. Lovely to see ya. Cheers, mate. See in two years. See in two years. Bye. Tom Parry. Yes. What a great guy. I love Tom Perry. That was a good one actually. It was good we caught him just because it feels like they're at the end of baby
Starting point is 00:56:57 beginning of like child. And it's it's it's it's it's it's the the the the the the their it's it's their it's their their their their their their their their their their their their their thi thi. thi. thi. thi. to be to be to be to be tooomky. tooomky. tooomky. tooom. tooom. tooom. to bea. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. tooom. to. tooom. tooom. tooombea. tooombea. tooombea. tooombea. tooomb. tooomb. tooomb. tooombara. tooomb. that routine, you want to like the screen needs to go soon, the mattress is going to come out of the bedroom soon, but it's all where it's overlapping where you it's a hard finding that line, isn't it? I didn't even know there was the option to keep the screen on at all the time. O'r's is a movement, or sound, I think, their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their is just. their is just. their is all. their is all. their is all. their is all. their is all. their is all. their is all. their is all. their is all. their is all. their is all. th. th. their is all. their. their. their. It's all. It's all. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's the the the the the the the t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. the the t. the the the the the the the the the the th. the the then you get the thing at 3 a.m. when it lights up you're like this is bad news. Yeah well I can't remember when we stopped having a camera to be honest I think it broke and we never fixed it. Yeah we've still got ours not with our daughter because I remember there was a stage where you're filming your child and't think my anxiety could have hoped to have no screened from the beginning. If you are a no screener and you've never had a screen, like a camera on your baby, let
Starting point is 00:57:52 us know and let us know how that felt, why he comes that decision and is it fine and we're all worrying too much because we were big screen guys in our house. Yeah, well I tell you why we find it useful. th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, that, thin, th. I, the the th. I, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, they. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, th. I's, th. I's, th. I's, thr. I's, thrown. I's, toge. I's, toge. toge. toge. toge. th th th throwne. I's, thrown why we find it useful or do find it useful. It's like when he goes down you know you leave him and sometimes he's shouting but then you look and he's he's lying down and you like that's going to be fine and sometimes he's standing up in the cop and you can tell the difference by how he is in the cot if you know what I mean? Yeah, rather rather than going in, rather than that than than than that than that than that than th, lying down I'm not going in. Yeah and they sort of get up and they jolt up and make a noise and look around and then lay back and go straight to sleep yeah but if you'd already gone in you're waking the baby up. Yeah exactly exactly Rob. Also as well the father Christmas one's really gonna
Starting point is 00:58:35 to divide people and that is gonna and Jane are thinking about doing. I just don't think as a four-year-old I'd have kept it to myself at school. That's the problem. You start to impact other people. That's the thing, isn't it? Oh, it's a good one. Get in touch. Email in. Right.
Starting point is 00:58:56 See you later.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.