Parenting Hell with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe - S6 EP15: Stiff Neck Tales From The Tour

Episode Date: February 28, 2023

More misadventures in parenting (and beyond) with Rob and Josh... available exclusively (for free!) only on Spotify every Tuesday and Friday. Please leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs...... xx If you want to get in touch with the show here's how: EMAIL: Hello@lockdownparenting.co.uk TWITTER: @parenting_hell INSTAGRAM: @parentinghell MAILING LIST: parentinghellpodcast.mailchimpsites.com  We're going on tour!! Fancy seeing the podcast live in some of the best venues in the UK? Of course you do, you're not made of stone! Tickets available now on the dates and at the venues below. We can't wait to see you there... ON SALE NOW  14th April 2023 - Manchester AO Arena 19th April 2023 - Nottingham 20th April 2023 - Cardiff  21st April 2023 - London (The O2) 23rd April 2023 - London (Wembley) 28th April 2023 - Birmingham Utilita Arena  A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: hello@keepitlightmedia.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hello, I'm Rob Beckett. And I'm Josh Winnockham. Welcome to Parenting Hell, the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent, which I would say can be a little tricky. So, to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern-day parenting, each week we're chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping. Or hopefully how they're they're tha th hearing from you the listener with your tips, advice, and of course, tales of parenting woe. Because let's be honest, there are plenty of times when none of us know what we're doing.
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Starting point is 00:01:34 Get Uber won for students. With deals this good, everyone wants to be a student. Savings may vary, eligibility and member terms apply. Hello, you're listening to Parents in Hell with... Can you say Rob Beckett? Mark Beckett. And Josh Whittakum. Nice to be done. That was nice one.
Starting point is 00:01:52 I like that. I think I've been quite critical recently of some of the voice names. But I think that's because I'm tired and tetchy. I've been burning the candle. I think it's I've that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's both ends Josh and I think it I've been blaming it on two-year-olds. I think it ruins my personality. I think when I'm at my, I think my face and appearance and my personality, when it's on form, it's absolutely top level. I'm smiling, I look full of beans. I'm a good-you wear your tiredness. I wear it on my face and my soul. So when I'm when I when I when things are good I'm on fire when they're
Starting point is 00:02:25 bad I'm a I'm a tough guy to be around Josh you know that yeah I don't know if you're that bad you just go you're just quite quiet maybe it's because I just operate on such an elite level of happiness when I am happy where it's sort of almost annoying there's highs's no middle part. So apologies if I've been too harsh in your kids, like anything, the problem's me, not your not to your children. Dear Rob and Josh, this is my two-year-old daughter Matilda. Listening to you talk about other people's choice of names. No sort of joking. I like that name, I like that name actually. Just did it for a bit of fun. Well interesting, listening to tell you tell you tell you tell you tell you tell you to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the to their their their to to their to to to to their to their their their to to to to to that that that that their their their their, their, their, their, their their, I their, I their their, I their, I their, I their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, tho, tho, tho, the, tho, to to to to to too. too. too. tooom, tooomorrow, tooomorrow, tooomorrow, too-a, their, their, their, to tell, you talk about other people's choice of names, Davis and
Starting point is 00:03:05 Wolfgang has reminded me of when we called my mother-in-law to tell her she had a new granddaughter. You can imagine excitement telling the first person the news, when we told her Matilda's name, she replied, you've not. Oh, I like Matilda. And when we laughed at response, she said, oh good you're joking. Oh no, that's bad isn't it? Sid said she tells us she has now got used to Matilda's name. Used to? Frequently said, frequently says, there's no accounting for task in names.
Starting point is 00:03:34 Yeah, but you, used to is not a nice word. I've actually, now, you know, she's been around while, I love the name, it's a beautiful name. Getting used to it is a bit like someone who's seven years into a 15-year prison sentence but they go I'm used to it now you know I can't remember what it was like before. Thanks for your podcast it regularly makes me laugh out loud cat originally from Southampton Bridge. Oh Hebden Bridge? Oh Hebden Bridge. Yes question Robbock. I need to tell you why I was late. Yes I need to tell you to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the to to the the the the the the the the the the to the the to the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their they. I Icoooooooo. I was. I was. I their their they. I was. I their was you late? Because my son had stolen the mouse and hidden it. Oh that's a good one. That is classically on brand for us isn't it? So what was he doing in your office? So I was originally a bit late but then then I was on time because I moved the time back but then I couldn't log on.
Starting point is 00:04:21 But that's not on time because you know can I stop you? If you're late and you go, can we start at 25 past? I was on time for my late arrival. Yeah, but you're still late. That's still late. We agreed at quarter past 10. Okay, yeah. So, when it hit 25, past, yeah. I had a bit of fun really nice. I had to look for it. It wasn't anywhere to be seen
Starting point is 00:04:52 in my office. Rose helped and Rose found it in my daughter's bedroom. Oh God, that was lucky. That's next door to my office. What happens, right? Say we've got a busy schedule. We've got a busy schedule we have got busy scheduled today, we're in a view. I'm about to go laptop. Which hasn't got as good an internet because I can plug my computer into the internet. Yeah, but say no laptop, what happens with no mouse on these computers, on these desktop ones? I don't know. It's game over, isn't it? What's it? Go and knock next door and see if they've got a mouse. I'm trying to sink it. But I wouldn't be able to sink it because I wouldn't have a mouse to sink it. I just don't get wild wire about the wireless mouse is the most pointless wireless device. I know. Because it's always going to be near the computer. I'm not checking my emails with a mirror system from the shitter but I've got the mouse on my lap. Wireless headphones I get, because the thing it's playing from,
Starting point is 00:05:45 can be in a pocket, there's not loads of wires, but the wires straight in and out, isn't it? Yeah, exactly. Anyway, Josh, how are you? How are you? Could I just say, you go ahead. The rose had seen it, because I asked her where it was, someone was playing with it, said it was on the floor I was like pick it up I did think well don't leave it on the floor of the room no it's no longer there that's
Starting point is 00:06:09 let me have that let mommy have that that's daddy daddy needs that for work slash talking to his mate for his work so I've got two anecdotes for you Rob about my week go on okay join the one that's more funny let's do let the thu tho th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thus thus thus that that that that that that that tho. tho. tho. tho. the tho. I the the one the one tho. I the one tho. I the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the one the the the the that. that. that. I that. I that. I'm that. I'm. toge. ty. today. I'm. try. today. I try. to. that's. that's. tho. that's. the. the. I'm. that's more funny? Let's do parenting first and lead to the last... Also, we should explain we spent a lot of time together this week, haven't we? We can, because we were in Canterbury, Norwich and Edinburgh. The Big Three. The Big Three. Yes. So in two weeks I've done Lappland, Helsinki, London, Dallas, Arizona, Norridge, Canterbury and Edinburgh. Yes. Anything to avoid being in Zone 5.
Starting point is 00:06:47 So, I had a bit of a nightmare with the play scheme. The play scheme is the thing at school where the kids can go and do stuff during the holidays. You were all? So they've all got... When I was a kid it was called like Buzz Camps, where you go and then you're there when, so you're not home during the holidays if your parents send you for a couple of days. Yeah, exactly. So we get sent the kind of the menu of the five days of activities we choose Wednesday and Thursday. Right, so you're just doing two out of five, nice. Give you a break, with a mate. Perfect. Yeah, so it's fine. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. So, th. So, th. So, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. the th. the th. the th. the the's fine. Tuesday evening I get back from Norwich I think or no Canterbury. Canterbury? About midnight. Sure. And I think, do you know what? I haven't really received much any update or confirmation on that science museum trip she's going on tomorrow.
Starting point is 00:07:38 I then check my emails and um it's, you know there's an outbox on your iPhone emails. The outbox, yes. I don't know why you need an outbox but there's an outbox. The email had been sat in the outbox for two weeks not flying to the people, to the school. You didn't press send you pressed go to the outbox. I did press send. I pressed send. I pressed send.
Starting point is 00:08:01 I must have been underground or something when I pressed send and then it went in the outbox and they never sent. So you never signed her up to the trip? I never said, I got back at midnight Rob and I was panicking at this point. I had a bit of panic. I think panic in Josh is my favorite. There's two types of, there's panic Josh where you go quiet and you click your hands and get all itchy. And then there's also excited Josh where you speak really loud. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:28 Was in that cafe in Edinburgh working on the show and we was getting excited because the show was coming together. He's going, yeah, and that bit, there's people trying to eat egg and sausage, going, what the fucks that blow. I I I I's is is that's is that's, is that's, is that's, is that's, is that's, is that's, is that's, that's, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. th. the. th. the. the. the. the. the. th thousands of people in a theatre. Well, 800 in Edinburgh. But, um, and theatre's a big word. Tens. Tens of people left happy. Yeah. So, uh...
Starting point is 00:08:54 I got in and I was like, this is too... I can't keep this kind of stress to myself. Would you do Instagram live? I woke up Rose to tell. What? I don't know why. That is such a stupid. There's nothing she can do. You're in charge of it, you're fucked up. There's nothing. There's nothing she, you're in, you're adding to your problems. There's nothing she, you're adding to your problems. I didn't, so I walked into the room and she did wake up. I didn't specifically go. You pounded in. I didn't, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th, th, th, th, the, the, th, th, th, th, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the, th. That, th, th, th. That's, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. There, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, there, th. There, there, th. No, th. No, there's there's that, that, that, that, that, that that there's that that thoooooooooo. No. There's there's there's wake so I thought I might as well tell it I didn't specifically go in.
Starting point is 00:09:27 Yeah I didn't pound in. Yeah yeah how do you go in and the night went because I have to sneak in a lot in the night when lose sleep. I don't want to know about this Rob. No, I'm into the room. She listens to the podcast. On to be careful. the the. the. the. the. the. to. the. the. the. the. the. the. On. On. the. On. the. the. On. the. the. the. the room. the. the. the room. to. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. How. How. How. How. How. How. How. How. How. How. How. How. How. How. How the. How the. How the. How t......................................... How. How the. How the. How the. How the. How the No, so how do you how do you do it so it's dark right are you a flashlight on or the screen light on? No I'm not minor. No but on your phone not an actual helmet. All right. I'm Canary. Yeah. Up the stairs I do. So also I've got a pint of waters which
Starting point is 00:09:59 obviously isn't helpful. No. I go in in the dark. Yep. And we've got an on suite. Nice. So I attempt I just hope there's nothing on the floor. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I go in in the dark. Yeah. And we've got an on-sweet. Nice. So I attempt, I just hope there's nothing on the floor. I go get to the light to turn on the light in the on-sweet bathroom. Like nighttime nightmare. Yeah, yeah, exactly. So I go round the chest of drawers to the bathroom, turn that on and then I'm in the clear. But you shut the door, turn the light on, and do what you need to do? No, I don't shut the door and turn the light on. The light switch is outside the bathroom. So you have to turn it on and quickly shut the door so it don't feel the room like, okay.
Starting point is 00:10:32 Well, no, I don't really do that. fuck off? She wasn't happy. No. Of course she would. Understandably so. So then the next morning... I bet you just go I bet Josh will ring in the morning. Is that what she said? Uh, yeah. Well, no, I said that. Because I'd already come up with that solution so I don't even know why. I don't know why I'd woken her. I'd just have to ring them in the morning. So I rang them in the morning. Yep. They'd already bought the science museum tickets. No go. As we know about that, always a sellout every day over the year. Exactly. Absolutely. No chance to buy one on the door. Maybe there's a tow outside ticket.
Starting point is 00:11:17 Mine's selling singing science museum. Twenty-ifth-if-fet. I said I'll offer twice face value for one of them. He's on Star Park 500 quid, like a Newcastle fan trying to get to Wembley. So, we told her daughter. She won't go in. She didn't give a shit. Oh, that's good. To be honest, we were more concerned than she was. Yep, all wazed away.
Starting point is 00:11:41 Yeah. I've got got got got and drop my son at nursery which is next to the school, drop him at nursery and then we get a text from our friends whose daughter was going to the Science Museum with our daughter. Yep. And they say our son who was also on the trip is ill. There's a space going. Now do you think he was ill or their daughter kicked off and said I don't want to go about my friend and they just the the their... their.. their. their. was ill or their daughter kicked off and said, I don't want to go without my friend and then they just went, buddy, you take you one for the team? No, I do think he was ill. No, no, because I know what happened.
Starting point is 00:12:11 She got to school. She was quite nervous about going because her brother wasn't going, because her brother wasn't going. to school said she's not going either, and so she burst into tears. And so at that point, I had a real, moral disaster on my hands. Oh my daughter, my daughter was fine to go or not go. She was totally indifferent. Your daughter is one of the most chilled people I've ever met. Her energy, isn't she?
Starting point is 00:12:45 Not last night, she was in a move for two hours. What about? Because her tooth came out, her first tooth came out, when she was staying at Rose's Mums. Yep. Which was very excited, they lost it. They didn't find it. They didn't find it. She swallowed it probably. I didn't want to say that to her. It's probably in your stomach right now actually. I didn't, I didn't bring that up. So just sleep in your mouth open to the tooth fairy.
Starting point is 00:13:10 She's writing a letter to the tooth fairy. But so she wanted to tell us, but then Rose's mum came in and said, oh she's got a secret told you and she got all nervous about it and it all went wrong. Because it was too much pressure. And she got embarrassed. Yeah, exactly. Anyway, anyway. So she was, she was quite chill. Well, she prefers school to home. She said this to us. She said, it's fun at home, but it's more fun at school. That is fair that. That's what you want to take on life. Yeah, exactly. You'd take take take take take take take take you. you. you. you. you. you. you. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's to to to to to to the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She. She was. She was. She was. She was. She was. She was tha. tha. tha. tell. tell. tell. tell. tell. tell. tell. tell.their kids go to school, I'll be honest
Starting point is 00:13:45 with you, I'm already going through the teenage years now already where she's kind of she's putting a bit of distance in already. You want a confident kid that sort of fucks you off because if you don't you lumbered with them until about 36 and they're like, oh no I always have to go to my mum's for Sunday lunch. Fuck-o'-o'-f th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th th th thu-o' thu-o' thu-n' thu-n' thu-s thu-s thu-s thu, thu-n' thu-n' thu-n' tho' tho' thu-n' thee thee thee thee thee th th th. th. th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's th. She's-s the, the, the, the, the, thi. thr-n't-n't-n'-n'ean's-n'ean's thin. thean's thin. thean's thean's thean's thee, stand on your own two feet. Because your mom and dad ain't gonna be around forever. Now fucking deal with it now or deal with it then. So yeah, so that's what, yeah, I don't think we're looking at that. I don't think we're looking at that, maybe with our son, but not with her. Yeah. So anyway, at this point it's 925 when we get the text. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah, thi. thi, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah,. Oh yeah, and she's already up. Yeah, because you think she's at home for the day? Yeah. Because are they outbox? But I phone the school, they say, the bus sets off at 10. So if you can make it before 10. Yeah. So is your son still in nursery? Like he doesn't have half terms? Is it? They don't have half terms. I don't have half terms. Yeah. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their. I their their their. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'll their their their their their their their out. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. I. I. I. Yeah. I. Yeah. I. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll. I'll the. I'll the second one starts school, your life had been doubles. There's so many things going on. Taekondo school trips, packed lunch, well-booked date, stripy tights, the lot.
Starting point is 00:14:51 Exactly, mate. So at least you've got that bit of chill for the moment and then, you know. But it doesn't feel like that, because she's at home with her. So she's at home with our daughter. Oh, where are you? I'm out the school, aren't I? Because I've just dropped my son at nursery. So they've told you and said, hey, there's actually a space now and you're at the school? Okay, I'm basically at the answer is 20 minutes or? Well, my daughter can't decide. My daughter absolutely petrified by this huge decision, I think,
Starting point is 00:15:28 doesn't want to tell us that she's rather go to school than spend the day with us. So really, okay. Eventually I make the call myself. I say, she's coming. Get her in. It's worrying if you're the strong decision maker in the group. What do that? that? that, that, that, that aren't you, sometimes? Oh my God, I did think that's unfair. I think that's very unfair. You didn't like that, did you?
Starting point is 00:15:48 Well, I think I make. Look, Josh, can I just say, look, I don't upset you, but considering that your emails in an outbox and you thought you'd thiwa's and swak some to wake someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone someone to wake to wake to wake to wake to wake to sort sort sort sort out out out out out out out to sort sort up from sleep. Yeah, you're like Liz Truss and Quasi Quartet. You'll make the tough calls. If you think it's right, you will do it. Exactly. Exactly. I was doing it for the country. And it would have cooked if it wasn't for the left wing establishment.
Starting point is 00:16:14 Those bastards at the science museum selling out. Yeah, exactly. I'm dispatched to the local Tesco to create a... Pat Lunch. Yeah. And his Rose getting her ready then or getting her to the school? Rose Springer in, yeah. So you're going to meet her at the school with the Pat Lunch? Meet her at the school with the Pat Lunch. Okay, right.
Starting point is 00:16:33 Oh God, this is stressful. It's a proper change. So what times the time but it's tight. Yeah it's about by the time decisions made as well. It's 11 30 it's 935. So you got 25 minutes to get the kid dressed coat on, shoes on in the car or a bus or wherever you get in the taxi to the school. You're getting the pat lunch. Have you got a bag to put it in a pat lunch box? No they're going to provide a thi to provide a thaaaa tha thuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu thrash thronge thronge thronge thrific one thrific one thronge thu thrace. So thrific one. No thrific one. No. No. No. No. No. No th thrific throngu th th th th tho tho tho tho tho tho tho the. So their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their tho tho tho the. thr. So thr. So thr. So thr. So thr. So thr. So thr. So thr. So thr. So thr-sooeat thr-soeat thr-soa. So thr-soa. So thr-soa' thr-soeate Tesco it's impossible to buy single Hula Hoop bags. So I have to buy a pack of six. So you got six packs of Hula Hoops, yep, sure. Four yogurts.
Starting point is 00:17:13 And luckily they've got, you know, when you think, who the fucks buying a plain cheese sandwich? Tell you're there. No mayo, no butter, just cheese and bread. Exactly. Job done. Bang. Get to the school. Say to the woman on reception, do you want five packs of hula hoops and three yogurts?
Starting point is 00:17:34 Surely you've got something to do with them. Does she want them? Yeah, she we go and she made it just in time. Good work. That's an excellent parenting, Josh. Yeah, although if only the email had sent, if only the email had sent, or I'd noticed six hours earlier. High five, little high five with Rose? Was it like a bit of celebration? We were quite pleased with ourselves, yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:58 Yeah, how well done. Miller Light. The light beer brewed for people who loved the taste of beer and the perfect pairing for your game time. When Miller Light set out to brew a light beer, they had to choose great taste or 90 calories per can. They chose both because they knew the best part of beer is the beer. Your game time tasks like Miller time. Learn more at Miller Light.C.A. Must be Legal Drinking Age. Should I tell you my absolute disaster? What was that? It happened when I left you yesterday Rob? So I had to get an earlier plane home. Yes, so we went in Edinburgh. Can I tell you something about happened in Edinburgh before? Yeah, yeah. So we met a couple of my friends from Newcastle came up, Michael and
Starting point is 00:18:48 at least. How late did you stay out? So after you, about another another 20 minutes. So I had two pints of lager, but I've not already been drinking much recently, because I'm apart from eating badly when I was away last week, I'm sort of trying to still get on the Gary.. Gary. Gary. Gary. Gary. Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, Gary, to get, to get, to get, to get, to get, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the, the, the, the the, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to to to is sort of really kicking off this week. And I had two pints of lager and it's quite confusing was in that hotel the Devere one where they don't have room numbers they have... Devan yeah, the van, sorry they don't have room numbers they have wine is that what those are? So it's like Polarger, Christa, Savignon Blanc all these different names of wine but then it's impossible because how do you know what floor you're on? Yeah, of course.
Starting point is 00:19:28 Of course. Of course, because it's not alphabetical that it was absolutely. So we struggled to find it when we checked in. I had two pints and I think, they went straight to my head because I didn't eat dinner and I was the most pissed I thi-I th..... th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, thi. Yeah, of, of, of, of, of what, of what, of what, or, of, or, of, or what, of what, or what, or what, or what, or what, or what, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or, or the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thi. Yeah, or the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their the the their their their their their their their their their stumbling against the walls. At one point I stumbled and hit some points. Yeah, but then but like it was sort of like really pissed for 90 seconds and I got myself together and I was stumbling through the corridor to the point where I fell on someone's wall twice and they went fuck off. No.
Starting point is 00:19:57 And then I was like, no, but I was slowly getting back and there was really really good boxing on that night, Lee Wood versus Marizzo Lara and I thought this is brilliant I've not found out the score the score the result I'll go up to the room I can watch that now pissed and probably eat crisps from the minibar because that's what Gary Barlow does I imagine he's on his fitness ratio and and as I actually as he told me to fuck off I went on my Instagram out of addiction and just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th I that that that that the that that the that the the that the to to to to to to to to to to the the the the to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they. they. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, the knockout came up, Leawood lost, seventh round knockout. That ruined it for me. But yeah, I was absolutely battered and I got lost for ages in a hotel. It's weird, didn't it?
Starting point is 00:20:31 But then I was like, oh, I'm all right now, but it was fake. Is it? Yeah. With your pint? I mean, if you want to feel many low calories it was. 12 calories. 12 calories for low Calaga. Yeah. Sorry so going you so you left me you left the hotel at 6 a.m. didn't you? I had to have a half 5. Half 5. Get in the car at 6. Yeah to get this early playing
Starting point is 00:20:58 because the trains weren't working yeah I got into the airport fine yeah. then I was th th th th th th th the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I was th. I was th. the the they. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I was. Yeah. Yeah. I was. I was. 12. 12. 12. 12. I was. 12. I was. 12. I. I. I. the the the the the the the the the train. train..................................................................................................................................... was walking along, walked into the lounge, Rob. And I was like, something's going on here. I can't pull my suitcase along. Yeah. My suitcase seems to be stuck. I look down. I send you a photo. Have you ever had...
Starting point is 00:21:21 I don't know anyone who's had this happen. Okay. I'm sure someone has... Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. So basically let me explain, this is annoying for the listener. So, I there's a photo of Josh's wheelie, you know, hand... So basically let me explain this is annoying for the listener. So there's a photo of Josh's wheelie, you know, hand luggage suitcase with a classic pair of white converse and where he's not tied his shoelace up, the shoelace has got wrapped around the one, it's fed into the wheel and to a point it looks like a knot on a yacht. You know like them sort of sailor's yawned so far. Rob. So my suitcase was stuck in. It's a the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's thi's thi's thozy's th. th's th's th's th's th's th's th's th's th. th. th. thozy's thozy's thia's thia's thia's thia's thia's thia's thia's thia's thia's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's thi's thi's tho's tho's tho's tho's tho's tho's tho's tho's tho's tho's toole toolooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo's tho's tho's tho's tho and to a point it looks like a knot on a yacht.
Starting point is 00:22:05 You know like them sort of sailor. Rob. So my suitcase was stuck to my foot as I was walking along. And I was quite a long way from a seat at this point. Yeah. And so I couldn't pull my suitcase. So I had to... Yeah, I had to take it off the ground. And I had to that, like, swing my the s my my my my my my my my my my my my my my my my my their their their their their their their their their s-s, to... Oh, such a funny photo, Josh. Yeah, I had to take it off the ground.
Starting point is 00:22:25 Yeah. And I had to that, like, swing my suitcase in time with my foot as I walked. It was like, that's a bloke from last leg. Yeah. So I was having to tie my suitcase to go along with my leg. Because it was about, it could only go about two inches from my foot all the times. Yeah. And I sit down and I take my shoe off and honestly it was totally stuck. I didn't know what to do.
Starting point is 00:22:53 Did you cut it off? No, it took me ages. And then I basically realized I just had to wheel it the other way. Oh, to unfeed it! To unfeed it. So I had to basically wheel out my shoe out of my suitcase. So did you go backwards all the way through Secura in to the check-in this? Yeah, I missed my flight. You ended back in your hotel room, but yeah, but with my shoe up?
Starting point is 00:23:21 Have you ever heard about, have I told her what happened to Romish when he got the the to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have the to have to have to have to have the to have to have to me me the to be a ld what happened to Romesh when he got really pissed once after a gig. He got really pissed and he went back to the hotel room. And he sat there and he had a subway, he was trying to eat his subway, and then he couldn't get his shoes off because his shoelace was so tiat. Yeah. He was so drunk he couldn't do it. So the end he just got his keyed key key key key key key key key key key key key he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he and he just got he he he he he he and he he and he just he and he went he and he went he and he he and he he and he he and he he and he he and he he and he he and he he and he he and he he and he he and he he and he he and he he and he he and he he and he he and he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he went he went he went he went he went he went he went he went he he went he he he he he he he he he he the end of a bed and the skull by cutting his lace. Oh that's a great, that's a great one Josh. Yeah, I'm a big fan of that picture. Yeah, there we go. Stick that on Instagram. Oh, how's your week been Rob?
Starting point is 00:23:57 Yeah, busy. So when there was a way on Friday, we went up to Edinburgh Saturday, but on Friday it was half half term and my daughter had her first ever sleepover. Oh, so it was a bit like, she was just going on a play date around her friends and then. So it was her first ever sleep over out rather than having people over. Oh yeah, out, so she was out as well. She was having a play date of her friends. And then our friend said oh would she like to stay over tonight. So it was to. So it was. to. to. to. to. the to. to. the the the to. the to. the the to. the to. the the they. the they. their. their. they. they. So, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their. Oh, their. Oh, their. Oh, their. Oh, their. Oh, their. Oh, their. Oh, their. Oh, their. Oh, their. Oh, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, th. So, the th. So, their their th. So, friend said, oh, would she like to stay over tonight? So it was an impromptu sleep over. Impromptu, right? And I, and they said, we haven't asked her yet, just wanted to see if you were happy with
Starting point is 00:24:31 it, okay, if you feel she'd be okay. And I was like, me and I was like, oh, God, well, we knew wea should have have to have, we should, we should, we should, we should, we should, we should have, we should have, we should have, we should have, we should have, we should have, we should have, we should have, we should have, we should have, we should have, we should have, we should have, we should have, we should have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have, to have, to have, we should, we should, we should, we should, we should, we should, we should, we should, we should, we should, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, we, to. to. to. to. to. to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to....... to, to, to, to, to, to, to. to. to, to, to, to, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to. to. to. to. to. think you think oh I hope she's not like me but I'm like no just be separate this is nothing to do with you disengage that ego she's a totally different independent person that's had a different upbringing and lifestyle she might be fine let her live it before you say it's sure you're gonna be okay don't yeah yeah put those insecurities of your own on to him totally sootally so how did it to to tho the th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th so the tho tho the to soo soo soo to to to soo soo so. so. so. so. that that that that that that that the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th so the the th so the the th so th so th so th so th so th so th so th th th th tho tho tho tho tho tho tho to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to tooo. to to to to toooooooooooooo. that that that basically I was back home because I had a great day basically the skip was supposed to be deli I'm getting a skip right Josh yeah to clear out the garage and stuff it was supposed to be delivered on Friday yeah my daughter was at a playdate and the youngest one was on a playdate with Lou the too too the toooo's, get home, get a message from the Skip Company. It's not coming today, it's coming Saturday. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:25:27 Do what I did? I just went to bed? What went back to bed? I just got into bed at 11 a two hours? Oh my God. And it was, I felt like I was committing a crime. And I just I thought, no, I should get some sleep. Stop thinking. Yeah. So anyway, so I got some, and I woke up to that message and I was like, okay,
Starting point is 00:25:52 cool, yeah, let me double check with Lou, that they're not going anywhere tomorrow because I know I'm up and out. What time? What time, what time, what time, what time, what they they they they they they're they're the time. What they're they're th. What th. What th. What th. What th. What th. What th. What th. What th. What th. What time? What time? What time? What time? What time? What time? What time? What time? What time? What th. What? What? What? What? th. What? th. What? th. What? th. What? th. What? th? th. th? I th? I th. th? I th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I tho. I tho. I thoooooooooooo. I thooooooooo. I th. I thooooooo. I th. I th. I th. I th. I right okay. Because I presumed it was later in the afternoon. You still had a good old sleep there though. Lovely little snooze me, catch him right up. And I've just been burning the candle at both ends this too much work, too much fun. And anyway so I was like let me double check with Lou in case. theylla to look at their to Lou. so let me double check with Lou. they's it's going is is is is is is going. the. the. the. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's going. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. I. I. It's just. I. I's just. I's just. I's just. I've just. I've just. I've just. I've just. I've just. I've just. I've just. I've just. I've just. I've just. I can't get free to Lou. The play date she's out, there is no signal, okay? So, what are they doing, caving? Well, no, it's just, I think someone's house, I don't know, some places around here, I haven't got a very good signal. Anyway, no, zero signal,
Starting point is 00:26:32 nothing, and then all of a sudden get a message. I've got no signal here, I'm stood on a bench of my arm in the air. Well, that never works. And I'm just thinking, you're at someone's house, get on the Wi-Fi, you fucking moron. Did you reply that? No. I was livid. I was like, how can a grown adult be in someone's home? But the thing is, it's not because she's too polite. Wobey, because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's because she's a th. thi? thi? thi? thi? thi? th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. the thi. the the the thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th thi. thi. thi? thi. thi? thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. to. thi. to. to toe toe toe th toe toe th toe th toe th thi thi thi. thi. th th th th th th say. Yes, that's exactly what it is. And I just, because I'm a Becky, I don't compute that. Yeah. I just think, but I thought, no, she obviously has thought that. Because
Starting point is 00:27:09 I'm trying to be more grown up in her being not being too quick to judge. I'd say, yeah. It's got to come a point when it's easier to ask for the Wi-Fi. It's easier to ask, their their their their their their their their their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tho. tho. th. But, but I's that. But, but I's that. I's that. I's that. I's that. I that. I that. I. I I I. I. I I I. I I. I. I I. I. I I. I. I. I's th. I. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I've th. I've. I've tho. I've just just. I've just. I've just. I've just thought, I've th. I've just thought. I've just thought. I've I'll do that then rather go, oh actually can I get your Wi-Fi and I could just WhatsApp call him. Yeah. And then we'll get this, get this solved. Anyway, so I couldn't hear from her. So I was like, oh, I don't know. I didn't hear from Louvre. I had to ring, I had about about about about their their their. I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, th, th, th. th. th. th. to, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, th.. to, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, th... And, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, th.................. And, th... And, th... I... to. to. to. to. then, to. to. to..... to. to. to.. th. to. th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, sleepover. Thank you very much. Let me know what I need to bring. And then she went, call will do.
Starting point is 00:27:47 I know, I said, let me know if there's anything that she wants because I thought, she might want a teddy if she, you know what I mean? Or whatever? And then the mom of the other daughter said, the other child said, can she go swimming. the others are having their lesson and they can all swim together. I was like, yeah, of course, no worries. So now I've got to try and find the swimming stuff. That's why I need to ring loose. I don't know where the swimming stuff is. Our house is a state because we're in the middle of moving and packing. Anyway, so four things all that. Nothing practical. This is difficult. Because it's not your child.
Starting point is 00:28:26 Barbie Dreamhouse. No, it wasn't Barbie Dreamhouse. She wanted to, I'll give you one though, her cheater, Teddy. It's one of her teddy, she's a good one. Yeah, so you got a toy. That was a toy. Pajamas? Oh that's not unpractical. No. Then the other ones were her iPad, it's fair. Her iPad, yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:45 And then a book about hamsters. What? What? What? That we don't know? Just a general book about hamsters. I was going to go shopping for a light. Amazing.
Starting point is 00:28:55 Did the other people have a hamster? I thinks they've been talking about hamsters and she used to have a hamster. She wanted to book about hamsters. So I got the other three for a-four. Yeah, and then I couldn't find any goggles, but then the other parent had the goggles, so it's fine. So I went, I went, I went, drop all the stuff off. And then I got there and the door opened. She literally grabbed the sleeping bag and see it tomorrow. So she absolutely loved it.
Starting point is 00:29:27 And then your evening you just have one child there. One child and then but she found it a little bit like she missed her sister. That was more of the thing I didn't think about. We had to lay with her upstairs a little bit because she's so used to two people being upstairs when she goes to bed. I tell you the the to the to to the the to to the to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the. I theat, thin, their their theat, theat, the. I the the. I their their their their their the evening, their their their their their their their their evening, their their their their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, thin, the. I theat, theat, theat, theat, theat, theat, theat, theat, theat, the. I the. I their the. And to bed. I tell you what Rob, that's a future that I hadn't really thought about is that when your slightly older daughter starts socializing more, yeah going to the place. Your slightly younger daughter's going to struggle with that isn't she? Or she's going to be going to be going to the pub at 14 while the others 16? Well she's quite tall my youngest so I think she'll be able to get in on a ID. I think that's what's going to happen.
Starting point is 00:30:06 She's quite palli of her the older friends as well already. So we'll see. We'll see. That's a success though and was she enjoyed it. And which did she enjoyed it? Yes. theymeat. Yes.
Starting point is 00:30:16 . . I don't know if I mentioned it in the podcast on on a daddy's day because I've been away a lot so I just took him out for the day and then she woke me up at six in the morning and she stood in front of me did that thing well you know like in films where you sort of put your things and bend them back like you can lift some weights you know that sort of that. She did she that to go and go right dad daddy day tod today that day day that day that that day day day that that that that that day day day day day you you you you you you you you you you you you to to to to that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day day to day you to day you to day you to you you you to you to to you that you to at work. Where did she got that from? I don't know it's mental on it. It's funny. But then I took him to the park on a on the daddy day. And I did bike riding with him.
Starting point is 00:30:56 Okay, so this is a problem Josh that you're going to face. Teaching him to ride a bike, the seven-year-old now can ride a bike. She can start herself, stop herself. If I put her in the park on the bike, she will just go around the park, okay? At quite a speed, the five-year-old, good, but she needs a push to get going, and she won't go super far. When ever she gets a bit near another person or a wobbly bit of ground,
Starting point is 00:31:18 she'll stop and then I'll need to go to her to her to her to go to start her again, which is, you know, great, she's only five, she's doing really well. But the problem there is, I've got one, one side of the park, stop it every 20 yards, and another one, about a mile away. Yeah, that's not ideal. And I was like, this is actually quite dangerous. I don't want to be like that sort of like over... This the two sisters of one of my daughter, friends friends friends friends friends friends friends friends friends friends friends friends friends friends friends friends friends friends, the to their to their to their to their th, and their th, and th, and their th, and their th. Yeah, and their their thi, and to to their to to to to thi, and to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their, and another, and another, and another, and another th, and th, and th, and th, and th, and th, and th, and th, and th, and th, and thi, and thi, and their, and their, and their their the, their their their their their thee. their their thea. thean, their, their, their bikes and biked past and I was like where's the third sister? And then a good 30 seconds later the third sister who's much younger comes around with a stabilizers on with the mom and you're like the this is like the kids that can just ride off so can I tell you what I'm thin to my daughter to ride a bike? Go on because she's she's in the kids that can just ride off, so can I tell you what I'm thinking about doing about teaching my daughter to ride a bike?
Starting point is 00:32:07 Go on. Because she's learning, you need to teach her around now really, don't you, because she's just not that fast. She's just not that fast, but this is what I'm thinking of doing. My friend did this is true, but I thought it's quite a good challenge to set myself for the podcast. Yeah. There's a YouTube video that my friend watched, which is in real time you can teach your child to ride a bike in 12 minutes. No, depends on the child, mate.
Starting point is 00:32:37 And the bike. So it's a different technique to everyone. I think it's something about having to see. My technique was push-up-o-for-the-best. Yeah, so it's not that. I would suggest a start on a slight downward slope. Well, I'm going to watch the YouTube video, but I'm going to try and teach my daughter to learn the bike in 12 minutes.
Starting point is 00:32:58 Just to see what it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like it's like what it's like what it's like what it's like what ittried this is it complete bullshit Because my friend said it worked for her She just did the the technique Absolutely they were riding within 12 minutes 12 minutes 12 minutes sure what I would suggest I don't know if it's part the 12 minute technique But get they called hand sonic bike training handle thing so what you do is you you bolt it into the back wheel I haven't got time for that that's that's already that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th that's th th that's th th that's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the te only tea tea tea tea'' one one one one one one one one one one one one tea tea tea te' one one one one one one one one te' te the the. I haven't got time for that. That's already six minutes gone. But because what my main problem was my back. If you're a hunched low, holding them or holding their seat, but this thing clicks onto the back wheel and then you can,
Starting point is 00:33:33 it's almost pushing it like a buggy. And you're just holding it to my back's not going to even my back can last 12 minutes but if anyone all right player only problem is your neck only last five minutes yeah should we talk about how on rock and roll the tour is probably we discussed oh my god it's embarrassing it's so so hilarious so we stayed away so we've stayed away so we did three nights away and then then we can't bring it to their to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their back. their back. their back. their back. their back. their back. their back. their back. their back. their back. their back. th. th. their th. to to to to to to their their their their their their their their their. their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their their. their. their. their. I I I their. I their. I their. I th. I th. But. But. But. But. But th. But th. But th. But th. But. But th. But. But. But. I th. But. th. But. th. th. But. th. But. But. I th. But. I th. I th. I th we discussed that. Oh my god it's embarrassing. It's absolutely hilarious. So we stayed away, so we did three nights away and then Canterbury and Norwich we came back the same night and then we stayed over in Edinburgh. So four nights away so far on the preview show on the work in progress. Also thank you so much for coming. Oh yeah they've been brilliant. Thank you so much for coming. It's really helped and I hope you've to to to to to to to to to the to the to to the to the to the to the to the show. to the show. to the show. the show. to the show. to the show. to to to to to the show. to to to come. the the to come. to come. to. to. to. to. to. to. the the the work. the work. the work. the work. the work. the work. the work. the the the the the the the th. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So. So, the the the the the the the the the the the to. So, to. to. to. to. to. So, to. So, to. So, to. So, to. So, to. So, to. So, to. So, to. So, you've enjoyed yourself and the show's really coming together.
Starting point is 00:34:26 And the show is really fun and good. We're really happy with it. Yeah. There's a few things we need to cover that it's exposed about us. Number one, I'm going to go through them. We're not rock and roll at all. No, so we've stayed in four hotels, four nights in four hotels, and apart from Edinburgh because we had friends, every single night we've got back to reception and gone see ya and just walked immediately to our room separately. Not even a sniff of fancy a quick drink or shall we have a drink like and even and even dad's desperate desperate to be on their own in a bed. And even like Edinburgh, like I wanted to catch up my friends, but you were only being
Starting point is 00:35:06 polite really, really deep down. Very nice, thank God. But you wanted to go. You had half a sip of your drink and then you fucked off to bed quite rightly. Match the day. Match of the day. Match the day youthat was directly below our bedrooms. Oh my God, oh my God, I just can't even comprehend. There's a comedian I know. He'll like to go in the busiest bar in the town and
Starting point is 00:35:33 sit at the bar and talk to the locals. Yes, I know this. That is literally, I just, I'm so far from that. I want to go, I just want to be on my own, read my book in bed and watch Patch of the Day. Is there anything wrong with that? I'm not Keith Richards, I've made my piece with it. Yeah, but there are some comedians do that. I've heard that from some, that they'll go right, where's the bar, get a drink and just chat to everyone that comes. I'm too tired. Yeah, I'm knackered, mate. I'm absolutely knackered.
Starting point is 00:36:07 And those people that do like two and a half hour shows, I'm like, what, that's too long. Yeah, nice 90 minutes, job done, see you later. Yeah, we're having a lovely time. My friend said, what's it. He's so professional. Am I professional? That's what I like about it, Rob. We do the job and we go to bet. I am very professional when it comes to gigging. It is like, I have to give properly, I will never be drunk or if the show's tonight, because I look at it, it's people who have spent the hard-earned money. They've got a babysit. It's a ball, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it, it's to, it, it's a bad, it's a bad, it's a bad, it's a bad, it's a bad, it's a bad, it's a bad, it's a bad, it, it's a bad, it's to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their, and we's, and we's, and we's, and we's, and we's, and we's to to to to to to to to to to to be. It, and to be. It's to be. It's a bad, it, it's a bad, it's a bad, it's a bad, it's a bad, it's a bad, it's a bad, it's a bad, I's a bad, I's a bad-a, their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their, it's a th going out, especially now I've got kids, and how much fucking effort it takes to leave my house.
Starting point is 00:36:46 So if I watch up someone who's just pissing about and not put the effort in, it drives me fucking loopy, but yeah, you're very professional as well, because I think that's when it could crumble if like one of us weren't putting the effort in. But it'll drive me mad. The thing I'm learning from you is about talking to people to people to people to people to people to people to people to people to people to people to people to people to people to people to people to people to people to people to people to people time, so I'm trying to talk to people less to conserve my energy for the show. Yes. So, so I sit, the first time was when we're coming back from Canterbury. Yeah. So, because we live in different parts of London, you had one guy driving you, I had a different guy driving me. Big up Allen and Allie. And you were like, sit in the back, chill out, you, you, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the to the the the the to the the the the the the to the the to the to to to to to the to to to to the the the the the their, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. I. I. I. I te. I'm, try. I try. I try. try. try. try. try. try. try. I try.ie and you were like sit you just sit in the back Chill out because I always sit in the front and feel I need to make conversation because that's who I am
Starting point is 00:37:30 Yeah, so I was like I used to do that and then but it's too tired if you're chatting to someone for two hours on a drive and then you've got to do a two hour show you You need to conserve your energy. So this was after after after after after after after after after after after after after after after after the show the show the show the show the show the show the show to the show to to to the show to to the show to the show to the show to to their to to the show. the show. the the show. the show. to to to the the the the the the the the the the the to to the the the the the to the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their tho. their their their their the the the the the the their the their the their their their their their their their their the show I get in, I sit in the back and I'm like, this is the new me. I'm gonna sit in the back, I'll make five minutes of polite conversation, headphones in, audio book, lovely. Sit in the back, I'm going, this is brilliant. And I'm like, so, uh, Ali, what other, what other people have you worked with, what other people have worked with the first people I worked with us I worked with Blur from their first tour up to 1997 and I was like oh for fuck like climbing into the front sea yeah Dave what does Damon eat before the show exactly I had to spend the whole the whole fucking journey yeah shouting from the back to get every anecdote I possibly could about
Starting point is 00:38:22 Blur also he's in a big like people carrier things. Yeah, I was fucking miles away. It's like trying to talk to a bus driver. But it would have been so rude if he'd said blur and I'd gone, pull over and then I'd just got in the front. Tell me everything you know. Or just go home recording and I listened to think, oh I was so obsessed with looking rude and being rude and stuff, but then also you've got to balance it up where you need to do what
Starting point is 00:38:49 is best for you to be good at what you do, do you know what I mean? So like I talk to people all the time that's my natural thing, but when I'm tired and stretched after you have having false wire. is part of my recovery from breakdown 2022, that classic year, is talk, just spend much more time on my own in my own head. And then we got on the plane, Rob, to Edinburgh and you went to sleep. Yeah, immediately. Headphones in, hood up, off. Obviously, I have a chat the whole way to the woman who sits next to me. It's a nice lady. Lovely. Do you know what? It's part, the problem is, I'm interested in people, Rob.
Starting point is 00:39:29 I mean, I'm the same though, but you have to hold it back or you run out of steam for the show. Because she once, she worked in fashion and I was like, I've got so many questions. Also you were talking about the east east east east east east east east east east east east east east east east east east east east gales there? And I thought, I'm fucking taping out of this fucking East End shit. But it was like, what's Stella McCartney like? What do you think of Victoria Beckham? Have you met Anna Wintor? Will Kangol make a comeback? Exactly.
Starting point is 00:39:59 Exactly. What I'm really interesting is how other people's jobs work. What happened to Von Dutch? Exactly. The worst, I was at a wedding and I sat next to a woman, I didn't know. She said, I said, what do you do? And she said, I worked for tea pigs, you know, the tea company. Oh yeah. And I was an interesting job.
Starting point is 00:40:19 So how does it work? And I started asking to ask a a a a a a a th tea? What are your big competitors? What's your biggest selling? And I was really genuinely interested. And after a while she started and said, are you taking the piss? Are you like, are you so interested in the tea industry? Are you like, I think that's what, I think that's what mate, that's why we are comedians. We have that sort of energy to be interested about things and go, oh, that's strange and
Starting point is 00:40:51 then be funny about it and just, we've quite a thirst of knowledge where Ali who does, he loves, the poor tour manager does loads of running and he's really good at it. But we asked him so many questions about running his personal best what shoes he wears out past he keeps and He was exhausted by at the end of the chat He was like fucking I'll shut up It he ran he told me I went he ran from Birmingham to London really yeah. Yeah. Was he on the run on the run or run? He. Did a bunch of blur for two under ground. He ran from Birmingham to London, 120 miles. Stopped every 10 miles to refuel.
Starting point is 00:41:35 Biggest mistake he made. So I have an electric car, am I right? Oh, really nice. Really a bit of topical. He stopped at 4 a.m. had a pizza pizza that was a mistake. His stomach was in bits in a couple of the next 10 miles. Eating a pizza at 4 a.m. and it's not been a mistake. Yeah, exactly. Fucking pizza at Gullin. Where's he sourced that as well at 4.m. One-two-free chicken pizza some one of them ones. Those basic those drug dealers that pretend to have a chicken shop.
Starting point is 00:42:03 Yeah. He had a picture of 4 a.m. It's a refuel. We was just to laugh about that. You know that Mars drink, Mars, the Mars, no Mars, like chocolate milkshake, the Mars. They had like refuel on it, because I think it was like it was so calerific. It was like we can't pretend it's okay. You've been exercising, restocked. Those sugar levels. I love to, I love to Mars milk. Love to Mars chocolate milk.
Starting point is 00:42:31 Does anyone look better physically than before they had a kid? Right, let's stop bringing the mood down. There's people listening to this. Sorry, I just can't shift it. Also, we didn't even have to grow a baby the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the to the the the to the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their the ma the ma the ma the ma the ma. the ma. I the ma. I to me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me me the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tha. tho. tho. thoome. thoomea. too. tooea. tooea'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'a'ease. I just can't shift it. Also, we didn't even have to grow a baby. Imagine how old it is. No, it's like these bits. It's like the bottom of my back. Bottom flat. It's like the flanks of my back. Yeah. And they, it's, they just, over the top of the trousers.
Starting point is 00:42:59 However big I buy clown trousers. Yeah, but you look great, Josh, we're both being too arshin ourselves. Obviously we can get a bit of fitter and lose a bit of weight or whatever, but I think we're doing pretty well, so don't beat yourself up too much. You can't. You can't. Abbs won't make you happy, will they? But, you know, abiding a fourm. pizza won't either. So it's about somewhere in the middle. It's fucking ripped though in the alley. Anyway, he's so ripped. Oh, his cheekbones. Oh, let's do small business shoutouts. Here we go. Hello, Slags. I was listening to a corresponance section the other day about a mom throwing This was about taking photos of them or digitally doing them and putting them in a book.
Starting point is 00:43:48 So this is it. It's called Ease or EASEL. The idea is that you post my wife your kids non-shit artwork and she photographs them properly and gets them made into a lovely book to keep forever. She can also make books of birthday cards, school certificates, etc. Anything apparent, oh that's good, the birthday cards is nice. Anything a parent wants to keep without filling the house with tons of paper, your kids' artwork is safely posted back to you with your book just in case you do want to keep
Starting point is 00:44:17 it. Many customers also buy them as presents for relatives too and they always go down well. That's a great business because I might do that because I've got loads now that I'm sort of just storing at my office. It's Instagram, Easell underscore Bear, underscore books. Really good. Really good. Just keep it on the art world. Hi Rob and Josh. We love the show so much and want it to share with you our mission to make nursery photos better. Getting our kids to sit still, smile for the camera in front of a small backdrop can make nursery photos rather stressful and a pretty naff experience. So many nurseries have wonderful staff and set-ups including outdoor spaces. Outdoor play photography encourages children to do what they do best. Play. When children play, they become more relaxed and more themselves around the
Starting point is 00:45:02 camera so natural and authentic moments of joy are captured beautifully. The little smiles and facial expressions known to you that just warm your heart as a parent are always noticed when they play and just simply do their thing. As a photography business, we massive believe it in the ethos of outdoor play for children's well-being and development, as well as candid photos for parents. We're on a mission to change nursery photoshoots. If you're listening, please get in touch. Head to our website, outdoor play photography.com, for further information. Thank you so much, you sexy, beautiful beasts.
Starting point is 00:45:36 Ileen, beasts, I'm happy with that. Take it. Owner outdoor play photography and mom to a 15 month year old. Thanks for listening. Two quid in the swear jar. H, head, head, head, head, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our tooes, to our to our to our to our to to to to to to to to to to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our to our th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. tho. tho. tho. toooooooooooooooo....................................... 15 month year old nutter. Thanks for listening. Two quid in the in the swear jar. Right, okay, that's good, isn't it? I'll see you next time. See Friday for a guest.
Starting point is 00:45:53 A guest! Lovely. Bye. Bye.

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