Parenting Hell with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe - S6 EP47: I Love Packing
Episode Date: June 20, 2023More misadventures in parenting (and beyond) with Rob and Josh... Available exclusively (for free!) only on Spotify every Tuesday and Friday. Please leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs...... xx If you want to get in touch with the show with any correspondence, kids intro audio clips, small business shout outs, and more.... here's how: EMAIL: Hello@lockdownparenting.co.uk INSTAGRAM: @parentinghell Join the mailing list to be first to hear about live show dates and tickets, Parenting Hell merch and any other exciting news... MAILING LIST: parentinghellpodcast.mailchimpsites.com A 'Keep It Light Media' Production Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: hello@keepitlightmedia.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hello, I'm Rob Beckett.
And I'm Josh Winnockham.
Welcome to Parenting Hell, the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent,
which I would say can be a little tricky.
So, to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern-day parenting,
each week we're chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping. Or hopefully how they're they're tha th hearing from you the listener with your tips, advice, and of course, tales of parenting
woe. Because let's be honest, there are plenty of times when none of us know what we're
doing.
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Welcome to our home.
It's maybe a bit long to spend his people we barely know.
I guarantee you won't want to leave.
Speak no evil is filled with teeth clenching.
Seek clinging, seek clawing suspense.
Something's not right with him.
I've always wanted to fomely like yours.
James McEvoy will scare you speechless.
Oh! You are their then you then you thured. Oh! You're going to kill us. We're just sad to see you go.
Speak no evil. Only in theater is now. Hello, you're listening to Parenting Hell with
You're in. Can you say Rob Beckett? Rob Beckett. And can you say Josh Widdickham?
Josh Widdickham.
Well done, sweetheart.
It's quite sweet actually.
That was very efficient, aren't they?
They seem nice.
Hello, here's our attempt at the intro.
We thought this would be a good one for Rob to guess
and where we are from.
I think she's from Britain and the daughter, I think they have moved to Canada and the child is half English, half Canadian.
When you said Britain, you were correct, but also I got really excited,
because you were the first three letters were correct.
Correct?
Brighton.
Oh, Bristol.
But why does the daughter sound like that?
I now live in Sunny Tampa Bay, Florida.
Oh, okay, North America. Kieran who has a Southern American accent. Thank you
for the amazing podcast, listen to every episode and always helps me feel close to home. Lauren
Rosario. I bet Rosario's because she's married to an American. That's an American name, isn't
it? I've got no idea Josh, but very, they treated that like homework. Yes. It's time that you let me and the listeners now about your holiday. Oh yeah. Oh, do you th you what, do what, I th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do the th. Do, I I I I I I I I I I I I I I th. I the the the th. I th. I the the th. I the the the the the the the the the the th. I've the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their. I've their. I've their. I've their. I the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm. I'm. to. I'm. th. I'm. th. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. It's time that you let me and the listeners know about your holiday?
Oh yeah. Oh do you know what? Because I don't want to be a stiff knack Rob. Go on?
But I thought I'd start with a reading from a book. Okay. I thought I'd start with a reading from a book.
Okay. Yeah. I think really sums it up.
The holiday, yeah?
Yeah.
Page 191.
OK.
This is from parenting how.
OK.
Rob Beckett on holidays.
Don't bother until your youngest is at least four years old, end of chapter.
Yes. That's one of my greatest quotes.
I stand by that's one of my greatest quotes. I stand by that. Do you know how often I thought
about that quote in the last week, Rob? So are you saying I was wrong or did you agree?
Oh Rob, you know, you play the full, but you're not, are you? Yeah. A two-year-old and a five-year-old, correct? Yeah. Okay. So we were cocky. Yeah. I would say we said a lot of stuff like, the to say. th-a. th-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-two-year-old and a five-year-old, correct? Yeah.
Okay.
So, we were cocky.
Yeah.
I would say we said a lot of stuff like God.
Because he watches a lot of TV at home, Rob.
I'll admit it.
Okay.
And we bought him an iPad as we discussed and we were like, ah.
Do you remember last year when we had to like keep entertaining him on the plane.
This year year, th, th, the the the the tho, the tho, th, the th, th, th, th, tho, th, tho, tho, thou thou thou thou thou thou tho, so to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to too, too, too, too, too, too, too, too, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to told, to too, too, tho, just pop the old iPad out, it's going to be fucking piece of piss, mate.
Nope.
Nope.
Because the thing is, Rob, and actually, while we're still in blighty, let me talk to you
about the two days leading up to the event, because I think when Rose comes on here again, they'll want to dispute this. She she she she she she she she she she she she she put to to to to to to to to to the their. She. to be to be their. to be their. to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be toe. toe. toe. toe. told. they'll she'll want to dispute this. She put two days aside for packing Rob. Two days? Two days. Two days
aside for packing. That's yeah I'd say it's a fair amount when you've got kids
on holiday a day to get the stuff you need and then a day to pack it but two
entire days is this? Well not she just said she didn't want to be rushed on it so. I th you don't to to to to the to the day the day to the day to the day to the the to the the the the to to the the the the to the the the to the the the to to to the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to pack. to pack. to pack. to pack. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the te. they. the te. the the te. te. the te. the the the the today. today. two today. to tod days is this? Well, she just said she didn't want to be rushed on it. So I think that's a good decision though.
You don't want to do any longer on tuna.
And she kept, she repeatedly said to me,
it's all right for you, you don't have to pack for the kids.
Overlooking the fact, she's been stressed about packing on every day.
She's been stressed about packing. she would be without kids. What's stressing to them about it? Is she an outskill for every day?
The fear that she's going to forget the toothpaste, get to Greece and there will just be no toothpaste
in Greece. Because they're known for that. It's actually against their culture and religion to brush
their teeth in Greece. But it's actually banned. If you don't bring a resort. And if you forget your swimming trunks, yeah.
No chance, you know.
If you don't pack those biscuits, they will not be biscuits.
That won't be biscuits.
I did my packing.
I don't know if it helped the situation.
I packed in 25 minutes.
Yeah, but your clothes are quite small aren't they? Quite easy to pop them in a bag. So all you got to do is get seven of
everything it's piece of fucking piss. I can count to seven pants seven pairs of
socks. Do you only do seven pants? What if you have a sweaty day and you're going
out in the evening? Let me tell you something Rob I'm going commando for the
day because of the swim shorts. Right. If anything those pants
aren't getting a full full run out. True correct and socks you don't need socks.
It's only socks really Rob I came back with two pairs of socks still in the
ball straight back in the drawer.
Right. I love packing I love packing I love fitting all the stuff in and it feels snug.
I said to Rose and she said this was weird.
You're a strange little man in you.
Yeah, well wait for this because said to Rose, I would love to be a pair of socks in a suitcase.
I'd absolutely love it.
Where do you put them in the shoes? The socks?
No, I tucked them into the little holts and I'd tuck them into the little hole. I do the big items and I tuck the hole in socks in the little holes and they're so snug it looks like. I said to Rose when we got there first
night and I was like, do you know what I'm going to think about while we go to sleep? I don't
imagine that I'm a pair of socks in a suitcase. And I was out like a bloody l'a'u. Is that your dirty talking talk. All dirty songs. I think though in Lou and Roses and most other people's defense, one packing the kids
is a nightmare but also on top of that we travel so much.
So we are used to pack in an overnight bag or four or five months away where most people
don't go away that much.
So we've become like George Clooney and up in the air.
Have you seen that film?
Yeah, yeah, that film. You love the suitcase packing, that's what you loved.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.
Cozy as hell.
So cozy, a little, a pair of socks.
So, did you actually think about being socks in a suitcase who you went to sleep?
For about the 30 seconds before I was out like a light, mate. I'm sleeping on my back now. Are you? Well because we moved and apologies it's
still a bit echo in my office the sound-proofing stuff's coming. I've had to
take down the you know my coat I put on a light I've had to take that down
because I turned the lights on and after 10 minutes I could smell burning and
I'm gonna turn around and my coat was on fire. Because you shouldn't put coats
why didn't that happen mid podcast? Because you shouldn't put coats on the way.
Why didn't that happen mid podcast?
We don't talk.
That is the greatest regret I've all worked well always have.
You can see that burn there.
Oh my word.
No.
Rob. Also, if it did go through, what a lovely story at the pub. If it's not kicking on, maybe we're there, we're not drinking, we've just had a coffee,
they go, say what, this is that coat, that bird, look at the back, nearly went through,
but I didn't.
Oh, that's nice.
So, why are you sleeping on your back?
So, because I'm so tired.
Because, right, right, because, because, because, because, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the house taking the kids to school it takes half an hour me and Lou are quite chilled about that. Lou has been worried about it for about a
year it's absolutely fine as anything anticipation,
anticipation worse and participation and then I've been going straight to the
office and then getting home and then when I get home there's normally something
to build or unpack so like I did a sofa't it? Building a sofa bed for my parents to come and stay.
So there's not even anything for Lou at the end of it that she wants.
It's like when they're, you know, like when a prisoner's made to dig their own grave,
that's a similar situation.
No, because when my parents come and stay, it's normally a brand new sofa bed that they can use and it's also a nice room for the kids to spend time in.
The key with the spare room in your house is make it nice but not too nice because you don't
want them there forever.
I would say our spare room, Rose's mom Sam, who I'm not saying that that has happened,
but it's now called Sam's room. Yeah, the girls call it, the girl, their, their, their, their, th, their, th, th, th, th, th, th, their, th, th, th, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, tho, their, tho, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their too. And, too. And, too.a. And, too. And, too. And, too. And, too. And, their their, their, their, their, the girls call it Nanny and Granddad's room, even though they've not even stayed in it yet.
But I've been so tired because I've sort of been up early during the school run and then out all day,
then come home and do something to about 10 or 11.
I've just been lying.
I've just been lying.
I've just been lying.
Just then I shut my eyes. I think I just get up at 6.30 a.m. now. I've given up on having a lion. Well, do you know what? Because we've had a bedtime, wake-up-time thing,
because obviously we've come back from Greece and it's two hours difference.
Yes. So Rose's friend was out there, coincidentally with her husband.
And he was, it still is. I imagine it's only five days ago.
Yeah, ripped. He looked fucking incredible. Oh, that's that, isn't it, when your wife's friend's husband's ripped?
No, it was very, it was a very nice man, but yeah, it did make me hate me hate me,
hate my own body. Hate my own body. And you saw, I just fucking oh, mate, give me a chance.
Yeah. He was incredibly ripped. And it turned out he was getting up at 6 a.m. to do the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. the. I. the. the. th. th. the. the. the. the. I. He was. He was. He was. He was. He was. He it turned out he was getting up at 6 a.m. every morning to do, what's that thing Joel Dommet does? Oh, Crossfit. Crossfit. So he
does, he got up at 6 a m. Every morning to do cross fit. And he works, it pays off.
It pays off. And so we were like, when we get home, we can just do it. to each go to the gym, once a to the too. too. too. to. to. to. to. to. to. the, to. the, to. to. the, th. th. th. to. to. thr. too. too. too. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. the, the, they. they. they. they. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. C. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. And. th. th. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the. to. the. the. the. the. the. th goes twice to personal trainer. I go once. All I need to is get up two mornings a week and do the gym.
Yeah.
At 6 a.m. That's all I need to do.
Then I'm going three times a week.
And that's great.
That's great. You're a gym now.
You don't go once a week.
You're in the gym., so our 6 a.m. is 8 a.m. She said she can hear me talking about her.
Hello? Shouldn't she, she's you unpacking?
She was very tired, she wants to say.
She's going to the gym later today. She said she was getting up for the gym at 6 a.m.
Which was 8 a.m. Greek time, which was the time we were living on. 6 a.m. comes, Rose, and get up. Fair enough.
Fair enough.
Yeah.
The kids get up.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Rose gets up at 7.30.
So it was Rose's supposed to be going to the gym at 6 a.m.
With the really thick guy.
So was it back home? Back home, right. And so the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first the first th. th. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. the kids the kids the kids the kids the kids the the the the the thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. the. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the the the. the the the. the. thi. the the. the really thick guy. So, so is it back home? Back home?
Back home, right.
And so the first day of the 6 a.m. gym club,
Yeah.
You get out with the kids in row six and half seven.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Okay, Rob.
Because I'm so zen thee.
Yeah.
I found it funny where I was angry at the world, Rob. No, no, but like, okay.
Yeah, that's what, that's what, because I blamed everyone else to my own issues.
That'll be it. That'll be it.
And I had no inner piece. Those are some of the reasons.
You hated yourself, but you blamed everyone else for it.
I hated myself, but I blamed everyone else, that was just moving targets of people to blame and that day wouldn't
have been, didn't go to the gym had no impact on you. Unfortunately for Rhodes
she was in the crosshairs quite a lot because I live with her. Look unfortunately
she wasn't in the crossfit gym at 6 a.m. just in the crossh. Anyway we digress we get the flight he does not he. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to th. th. th. to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. throw. throw. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I thro. I thro. I thro. I to to to to toeee. I toea. I toeea. I was just just just just didn't to. I was just didn't throa. I was just didn't thro. I the flight my two-year-old he doesn't
want to sit down for that I've written I've written notes here because I
thought rather than give you the whole holiday I'll just give you the first
day I think that's an easier way I got some quite panic text off you
yeah you got one from Rose saying the holiday was ruined I seem to to remember yeah that was quite that was on day one yeah it did that was quite that was quite that was quite that was quite that was quite that was quite that th I that was quite a a a a the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th I'm th I'm th I'm the the the the tho. I'm tho. I'm tho I'm the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thooooooo' the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thooooo' the the the Yeah, it did pick up, so I won't tell you about when it picked up. I'll just tell you about the first day.
See Rob, doesn't want to watch an iPad, they want to walk up and down the plane and grab.
Totally Rob. Did he have his own seat now? Or is he still in your lap? Yes, which he didn't want to sit in. So, oh yeah, and let's add this this this this this this this this this this this this this to to to the plane to the plane to the plane to the plane to to the plane to to the plane to to the plane to to to to to to to to to to to the plane to the plane the plane to to the plane to to to the plane up to to to to walk up to walk up to walk up to walk up to walk up to walk up to walk up to to to to to to to to to to to the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane the plane to the plane to the plane to to the plane to to to to to to to to the plane to the plane journey, Rob. Our plane got moved to an earlier time.
Right.
Meaning, we had to get up to get the plane at 3 a.m.
So what was the...
What time was to fly before?
Like a couple of hours later, we were getting a taxi from home at 3.30.
Who did you fly with? Your friends B.A. Absolutely fucking classic. Right.
Yeah. Who, to be fair, were very nice to me, but...
Well, that fucking moved you off flight forward to so well. Yeah.
Uh, on the plane, he just, I've just written the next note his plane. He just wouldn't stop moving around, Rob.
He was just too excited. And so... and this was to become my kind of basically my holiday,
particularly during meal times. Meal times is the key one. And that's probably the best
bit of the holiday in a way, isn't it? That relax. No, it's not. That was the worst.
For a good holiday people enjoy. Yeah, and it's not his fault because he doesn't want to sit there for a fucking two course or three course meal. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to. to. to. toe. toe. toe. too. too. too. too. too. to. to. to. to. to be. to be. to be. to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be. to be. to be. the the holiday, the holiday, th. th. the tod. tod. tod. tod. tod. today, today, today, the the today, the they. they. they. the the today, they. they. today, toe. toe. toe. toe. today, there for a fucking two-course or three-course meal.
Why would he?
Your daughter, is she on the iPad?
Yeah, so she'd sit there for a bit, but obviously when he's getting up and running around, it's
difficult for her not to want to join him.
Yeah.
Also, she's old enough.
She can wander around and play on the same with the plane. You don't watch succession do you, but there's a character in succession that's
Who's like the the kind of the minder of
Logan and then latterly Kendall Roy and he's just always walking three or four yards behind them?
And that's basically the role I had with my son. He wherever he went I'm just three or four yards behind him watching him. Do you know what I mean?
I'm just because because he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he just because because because because because because because because because because because because because he just because he just because he just because he just because he just because he just because he just because he just he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. He. He. He. He's he. He. He. He. He. He's he. He he. He's he he he he he he he he he he he he he he is just he is just he's just th. He's just th. He's just th. He's just tho. He's just tho. tho. the tho. the the the the th. the the the the the the the or four yards behind him watching him. Do you know what I mean? Because he just wants to go.
And then throughout the holiday, he just got faster and faster.
And so he's just running everywhere.
And people commenting on how fast.
Like, he's fast.
And he's just running and running, like Forrest Gump.
It was unbelievable. The moment he finished his food, he'll finish his food, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and they. And he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and he, and they. And they. And they. And, and they. And, and they. And, and they, and they, and they, and they. And, and they, he's they. And, he's they. And, he's they. And, he's they. And, he's just, he's just just just just th. th. th. theree's just thoo. th. thean, he's just just thr-he's just thr-he's just thoo. tho. tho. tho. It was unbelievable. The moment he finished his food, because
when we're at home, he'll finish his food and then he'll go off, right? But it doesn't matter
because he's in our house. We'll just go into the other room and play with something or watch
something. And you know he's safe. But here, suddenly you're wild. There's danger everywhere.
There's danger everywhere. There's danger everywhere.
The sea, swimming pools, playgrounds.
And he became obsessed with the shop.
He just wanted to go to the shop all the time.
And he seemed to around, wherever we were,
he seemed to know the route to the shop.
Also, hotel shops are so expensive.
Hotel shops are like the cost of living crisis all the time? You know where it's like all the time that price even when inflation goes down? We had to buy my
daughter wanted to buy presents for 12 friends. Okay. I spent over a hundred
euros. What no that you got you you have to say no. Yes I know that's too much or
buy a bag of sweets and give her a lolly each from holiday. But Rob the thing with it was the other other option that she she she she she she she she she that she that she that she that she that she that she that she th. th. th. th. You the other other other other other th. You th. You the the th. You the th. You the th. You the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their. You their. You're their. You're got. their. their. You're their. their. their. their. their. their. their. I their. I their. I their. I I I I. I. I they. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I the the the the the the the the to. I to. I to. I to. I tole. tole. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the the the the the the the the the the the Rob, the thing with it was, the other option was she wanted to collect specific shells
and stones on the beach with them. It was my last day. I just wanted some time to myself,
Rob. So you said let's not collect shells for your friends and go to the shop. She's collected some shells, there wasn't enough she-it. It was going to be a day-long project. their. It was. their their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. th-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-it-soa-soa--up. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. thoom. their sheat. their sheat. their sheat. their sheat. their sheat. It was. It was their sheat. It was their sheat. It was thso. It was thso. thso. th-n't th-a-s. th-s. th-s. th-s. th-s-s. th-s. th-s. th-s. th-weree. thoe. the. the. thease-a-s. thooease-s. thoea-sthem those things where they snap on the wrist when you work them on.
Have five euros a pop.
You got a load of wrist slappers for the kids.
Got a load of wrist slappers. Job done. Just some landfill. Just some plastic landfill. Now let me sit. Oh by the way, this is embarrassing. I took five books. Who the fuck do I think I am. th. th. the. th. th. the th. th. the th. the th. the th. the th. the the th. th. the the th. the their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. t. t. t. t. t. tip. tip. tip. tip. to. to. to. to. to. to. tip. to. the the to. to. the tip. tip. tip. the the way, this is embarrassing. I took five books. Who the fuck do I think I am? Did you read any of them? Two. I read two in the evening. They were short. I started with the short ones.
Two books. That's impressive. Away for a week. Well, he was in crash. 10 to 1.
Oh, so you got 3 hours a day in the kids club. Yeah, where he's in crash. And then, so he was in 10 10 10 10 10 10 10.. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the to the to the the the to to the th. Did to read to to to to their their to to to to to to to to to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did the the the the the the the the th. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. Did. te. te. te. te. the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the t 1. Oh so you got 3 hours a day in the kids club. Yeah, where he's in crash and then
So he was in 10 to 1 my daughter wasn't that into it, but then you've basically you've got me
Rose and her mom and my daughter. Yeah, and that's like she's can just play on the beach. That's what I'm saying over five is you can read and relax. Yeah, and then also this is some good reading time. He'd go for his the the th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. t. to. te. te. te. te. te. te. t. te. te. te. t. t. t. t. t. then also this is some good reading time. He'd go for his nap and we had like a sun lounger out the front of our room.
So someone could, yeah, how long was he napping for? Well, day one he napped for two and a half hours. I shouldn't have done that because he didn't get to sleep until 11 p.m. So basically you're not actually looking after him for five hours a day. Well, I was actually looking after him for five hours a th. So th. So th. So th. So, so th. So, so th. So, so th. So, so th. So, so th. So, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, th, so, so, so, so, so, so, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. So, so, so, so, so, so, so th. So, so th. So, so th. So, so thr thr thr thr thr thr thr thr thr thr thr thr thr thr thr the the the the then he was up to five really late. So he wasn't doing two and a half hours after that.
I'll tell you that for free.
That was what you would describe as a huge mistake.
Actually, the daytimes were the best part because you got the morning where he's in
the cresh and then you get a little bit of the nap, but then it was the evening, breakfast, lunchtime and evening, I genuinely there was meals where I think
I sat down for between 10 and 15 minutes max for the whole meal.
As soon as I've eaten they just want to walk or wander around.
And it's fine if they're just going for a walk.
The first day it was very frustrating because your whole perception of what's going
to happen is collapsing. That, honestly, is every, that's the one thing I try and tell everyone with kids is like,
I know it sounds mental that you're not allowed to have a holiday until your youngest is four years old.
You're better off saving your money. I'm not saying you can't go anywhere or do anything, go maybe for a cheaper like you know like a caravan, static caravans are really good
down in like Hampshire and stuff like that or something that's on the beach in
the UK for a couple of nights here and there and treat it like oh do so
fun with the kids and you're better off if you do have anyone to
look after them for a couple of nights and getting a quick mini break abroad or something where you have more relaxing time in two days
than you will in a week with kids. Yeah, well exactly, but my daughter had a
lovely time. She was perfect age for it. He, to be fair, he had a lovely time.
He had a fucking brilliant time. He loved the crash. He loved the beach, he had a fucking brilliant time,
but as I said to Rose, it's a shame that he's having such a good time and he's the only
one who's not going to remember it.
Yes.
This is wasted on him.
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So who's doing the main legwork of you just spitting it with, I suppose her mom's there as well?
Could she help a bit as well?
For the meal?
When he's just running around?
It's just relay. Do, do what I mean? Yeah, tagging in and now. That's day one you're disappointed, day two and
three, it's fine because you're just like, you've been to the resort I went to, you know
the like, that harbor area. Yeah. You're just running around, it's a very nice area. So you're just going, to be a nice. the they. they. they. they. they. they. thi. thi. thin. thin. thi. thin. thin. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. that's th. that's that's that's that's day. that day. that day. that day. that day. that day. that day. that day. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Day. Day. Day. th. Day. th. Day. Day. th. Day. th. Day. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that's that's thi. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's day, that's that's day, that's thi. thi. thi a harbour chasing up two-year-old. Hold a little drink? You're not drinking
anyway? I wasn't drinking anyway so I didn't was... You're not... you know. It's
impressive because the holiday beer is my probably favorite beer. Is it? Yeah
when you first get there and sit down at like a little cafe or bar. Yeah, but yeah it's good if you're still not you know yeah. that's th. It's good the the the the th. It's good th. It's good th. It's good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good good the the the the the the the the the to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I the thi. the thi. the the the the thi. the the the the the the the things. thi. the the the not doing it. So that was tough. Yeah.
That was tough.
There was a point, and I'd say Rose spoke for the whole holiday,
where on the first meal, she said the words,
this is a living hell.
It's because of the truth.
It's because of the expectation.
Yes, exactly what I was going to say. What you are you is, you is, you is, this bleeds into a bigger point where it's like all year you go it'll be fine
though because I'm going to Greece for two weeks or a week or Spain for a week
in August and thinking it doesn't matter that I'm exhausted and fed up
and stress now because I'll be going to go and people pin too much
too much hope. Hoad holidays are relaxing and fun because you're not in your house, you you can't not remind you about. You need to find a balance in your life. So Rose constantly points
this out to me that I'll go, don't worry, I've got two weeks off and then when something happens
like you get COVID at Christmas. Yeah. You're like, but I've been three months staking my time on this. Yeah, exactly. And then it builds up too much much. to. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. their th. th. th. their th. their thi. tho their tho tho their to to their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. Roo. Roo. Roo. Roo. Roo. Roa. Roa. to to. toes. to. too. to. to. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. to to to to it builds up to too much and there's too much pressure on it where you need an eight yes all the time rather than tens and ones.
Because I used to, the way I used to what was be like one or two of sort of enjoyment and
happiness going but don't worry because I'm doing that and I'm going to get that money and then we can go there and then we can go there and when when when when when when there and when there and when there and when there it there it there it there it there it there it'll go there it'll go there it'll go there it'll go there it'll there it'll there it'll there it'll there it'll there it'll there it'll there it'll there it'll the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their the the the the te are te are te are te. te. te. the are the are their their their their their It's too sad at the end of it. It's just so sad.
Like the hotbod couple, yeah.
And they both got hotbods?
He's got, oh, this is a soft question for you, isn't it?
There's no way of answering that, so I'm going to, yeah.
You can't comment on your wife's friend's body even if it's good
or otherwise yeah yeah yeah no you there is no winners here you just have to say
no comment no comment so because you go no she's out oh yeah yeah really good body
yeah there's nothing there's nothing her body's great actually yeah
but meaning to tell Rose out great her body.
Let's not go into it.
I want to go into it, but obviously you...
How about this?
Yeah, she's beautiful but not nearly as beautiful as Rose.
Oh, I don't know. I think you should have said no comment actually.
All right, I'll go with no.
That was mental. That was what the worst thing you could have. That was, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, that, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, the, oh, oh, tho, oh, to, the, the, the, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, tho, tho, tho, tho, the the the the the the tho, the tho. Oh, tho. Oh, tho. Oh, to, to, tho. to, to, to, to, to, the the tho. Oh, tho. That was the worst thing you could have that was a big for everyone involved it's just a no comment best way isn't it? Anyway
we were there on their final night. Oh they passed away. They went home before you
then. Yeah and you know like the last day of holiday you could feel it in the air
yeah I mean I felt sad for them and so that's why you can't stake too much I lived when I was when I was, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th I was, when I was, when I was, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. It was just th. It's just th. It's just th. It's just th. It's just th. It's just just just their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. It's just. It's just just. air. Do you know what I mean? I felt sad for them. And so that's why you can't stake too much on holiday. I lived when I was, when I moved
to London, I lived with a couple and they were into doing a big holiday a year, but they
just started jobs. So basically for 50 weeks a year, they were drinking tap water every night, they were batch cooking, they were not going out. You're only living for two weeks a year.
Yeah. You can't consolidate all of your happiness into two weeks a year.
Do you know what I mean? I know that's easy for me to say also because I love my job, do you
know what I mean? So that's an easy thing. So do you love it? So anyway, anyway, the holiday. But when I used to do do th, I th, I th, I th I remember once coming home from a holiday and I was so sad because it was basically you go on holiday and
you sort of block it all out don't you like, yeah.
I don't, that's not my job anymore and you're like, oh this time, and people say oh
this time, what would you be doing now?
I'd be doing?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I was, I, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, I was, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I was, th. to, to, to, to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. t to. t t t like a buzz off saying how much you hate it and then I remember landing and I was I come
with what job it was but I really didn't like it as literally I can still
close my remember the like the the wheels toucest the ground and the plane I
looked at the door I said fuck this and I went immediately to like one one out of ten happiness oh god yeah oh god yeah oh man it's it's it's it's it's the the the the that that that that that that that that that th i that th i th i th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th oh th oh th oh th oh th is th is th th to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th oh th oh th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th th th. th. th. th. th. th. I thi th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the the the the the the the the when I had a job that I did really didn't like.
And I remember vividly knowing that I had like 17 days off at Christmas. And then I just
remember I couldn't believe it when I was going back into work and I was like, but that was all
that was all that was driving me on. That was all I had. Now that's gone.
If you enjoy it, because if you enjoy what you do,
you never work a day in your life.
Exactly.
Isn't it?
And the problem is I love what I do,
so I put too much in because I want to do so much of it.
And then I don't enjoy it in because I don't enjoy any of it.
Yeah, I think you're to draw yourself out of it. I'm enjoying it at the moment Rob I'm enjoying life at the moment and it's making bad podcast but
who cares I'm happy. I think I think it's pretty solid I'm enjoying the
holiday. I wouldn't I wouldn't my takeaway wouldn't be from this. Josh is in
total bliss all the time yeah. He runs off-like at 3.30 a.m. He won't sit in his seat. But yeah, I don't think you need to worry about that, Josh.
So ahead of the success of the crash was day one.
So my daughter was going into kids club.
My son was going into the crash.
We dropped him off at 10.
They said, we'll text you if there's, you know, any issue.
Sure. If I had to say the job I'd like the least at a resort, it would be in that crash room.
It looked like a living hell.
The kind of, the music you'd associate with two-year-olds played so loudly.
Do you know what's worse than a two-year-old?
Is somebody else's two-year-old?
Yeah. And just loads to them.
And all of them are like, what the fuck am I doing in there? Where is my mom? I don't know who you are.
Why have you got a stroke? Why is your voice strange to what I'm used to?
Yeah. I can't speak Greek. What's going on? Anyway, my daughter then hurt her toe.
So we couldn't drop her into into Kids Club until she'd sorted that out. We took her up, got a plaster on her toe, dropped her in at 10 past 11.
I turned to Rose, and I say, we've got an hour 50 now until 1 o'clock.
Just enjoy it.
Sit on the sun lounger, 11.
Text from the crash, you need to come and pick him up.
We'd had five minutes of kid-free morning.
What's what's what's what's what he just wasn't having it? Yeah but then he had it for the rest of the days so that was when Rose said it went back the next day and he enjoyed it. Yeah he loved it to be honest
to be honest I'm not saying that it was better than the rest of the holiday but a few days in the evening he he. try try try try try th th th th th he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he the he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he the he the the he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he tried to break into the crash to get back into the crash.
Right, okay. Yeah, because I think it's people go on. How do you know they're actually enjoying
it? But like, I think I love the crash, mate. But your daughter didn't go to kids club after
that. No, she wasn't that fussed about it. And we liked hanging out. Do you know what I mean? You don't need need need it. You don't need it the the the the the the the to to to to need need need need need need need need need need need need need need it the the the to need it. the to need it. they. they. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. they. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're. they're. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they're. they're. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. Don't they. I. Don't they. they. I. I. I don't th. I don't to th. I don't know. I'm to to tod. I to the. I'm thoooooo. I they. I just hang out on the beach with her. To be honest we were like if you don't want to go don't go because
I want to enjoy the holiday with you do you know what I mean? That's nice
isn't it? Yeah. Because there's plenty of people on holiday that don't want to
spend time with their children. Yes's like if they want to go in it and they enjoy it, fine. But as soon as my kids say I don't like it in there, they're not going in.
Whereas some people are like, I'm having that conversation and there's another parent going,
yeah you are going in. Because I've got tennis in a minute. Get in there.
Who wants to play fucking tennis on holiday? Just sit down. 35 degree heat. Quick gamutennis, really?
Any other tales from the holiday you want to share?
Paid 35 euros for inflatable whale.
That was quite expensive.
They do blow it up there at that place.
They blow it up so you can't take it home.
Obviously, no one's buying an inflatable whale at a hotel shop to take home and put up in their local like swimming pool. No I know I
just gave it to another couple who just arrived. That's I'd quite like that if
you do by there's passing it on. You passed it on. I said keep passing it on and
imagine if we get it next year. Well I'm going in July so I'll try and grab it there. Are you? If you see a way. You've got to go in half-term next year because it's when all the footballers are there. You'll fucking love it.
What are I? I don't know. I feel like quite all... They'll love you all the footballers love
you. Did they? Yeah, you're the guy from Rob and Romash, League of the their own. Oh, they're all so so young. Oh, they. Oh, they. Oh, they. Oh, they. Oh, they. Oh, they. Oh, they. Oh, they. Oh, they. Oh, th. Oh, I they. Oh, I's all so they. Oh, I's all so their their their tho, I's all all all all tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' tho' th. Oh, I' th. Oh, I's th. Oh, I, I, I's th. Oh, I's th. Oh, I's th. Oh, I's th. Oh, I's th. Oh, I's th. Oh, I's all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all all. Oh, I's all. Oh, I's th. Oh, I'm thoooooooo-fooooo-l-l-I's thoooo-I's thoooo-I's thooo-I's th. I' th. I' th.. It's awkward. I'm nearly full to. It is weird and they've all got kids. They're encouraged to settle down aren't they? Are they busy lives. They're playing
football. They've got a wife, they've got our kids, they've got mistresses. It's non-stop.
I don't know how they have the energy. They've got to be fit those guys, up at six. So all in all. It was a it was a semi-successful holiday in the and do you know what you
instantly only remember the good bits that's the the fact of the matter yes
are you glad you've gone or would you yes yeah I am if Kresh hadn't worked out
it would have been a non-starter that's the thing you are you are taking a risk
because your son could have quite easy have just gone nap and cried every day because he's had a fucking brilliant time and it was really nice when it wasn't during a meal.
It's just the meals were the speed he ran away from the table was unbelievable.
So afternoons, so basically you'd go into the crash, have some lunch with him and then someone were taking back for a nap.
Yeah, and then basically you can sit around the pool or whatever. But when he was around the pool around the beach, is
he just running? Yeah, he's trying to get to the shop. But it's quite nice because you're just
walking along the beach. Do you know what I mean? You're like, you're just walking that book? Yeah. My step count. My step count must the tapapapapapapapapap. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. the the the the the the thu. thu. thu. thu. tho tho tho to the to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to try try try try try try try to to to try to to to to to to to to to maybe I was wrong in that book, but I definitely think four is the magic age.
No, no, no, no, it was a living hell within a day.
And I totally get that if you can hit, once we hit four, it's going to be a different
age.
I just think holidays at the moment are so expensive as well.
Like flights are insane. If you've got a two-year-old and you're like, oh, just sort of feel like, just save the money
you would spend, save it.
And then you can have, like, you can go proper hardcore when they're four and enjoy it, you
know what I mean?
Yeah, one final thing.
Go on.
We got though, and Rose had forgotten about four different things from the packing, and it was a glorious moment for me. What did you've th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho thate, tho tho tho tho tho tho- tho- tho- tho- tho- tho- tho- tho-a, tho-a, tho-a, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. And th. And tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, than, than, like, than, like, like, than, like, than, than, than, than, than, than, to-a. to-a. tooan, thoan, thoan, thoan, thoan, thoan, than nappies? Yeah. Crocs. And what about for the kids?
Hey, this is good stuff. Yeah. Waterproof nappies and crocks. Quite key elements, I'd say, as well.
Do you know what, Rob? They're available to buy, so it's fine. It's absolutely. I mean,
you know, say what you want about Greece, they do have to have to do the packing for the next holiday and it's
going to be a fun... Do you know what I should do it as a test for the podcast?
But you know what? There's no win there because if you pack for the holiday and you do it really well she'll be even more livid. Yeah, and if you don't pack it, their th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thr-I's thr-I's thr-I's thi it's thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the the the the the the tha-I I I I the tha-I I I I I I I thae thae thae their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their taskka. taska. tea. tea' tea' tea' tea' tea' tea' tea' tea' t forgotten about 16 times. Yeah, I imagine, I think you're quite a heavy communicator when they're packing for holiday
because you get quite excited about it.
Well, no, I do my packing, and then I go, I don't know if this is an annoying habit.
I do my packing, I'll finish, and then I'll go sort of, she, you're, she's sort of doing the packing for
you then.
Yeah.
No, no, I've broken the back of it.
So, and what does she say?
Oh, you've only packed four books, you need another one?
She won't go into it.
She's, she, she can't, she can't go into the kids and you just totally your own world. Kind of yeah. Some, like my dad and that generation, my mom would pack his clothes and also buy his
clothes.
That's mad isn't it?
Like, my dad's mom would buy their mom.
I shouldn't get in there.
And you've had your stuff packed for you.
And you don't even know what it is.
Because like mom's been holiday shopping for dad and he gets it, it just pulls out some
shorts and a t-shirt, puts them on and he looks like, oh, and then he'd moan go and
go down to the fucking shop and try it on.
She can't.
How does she, how does she, I buy stuff for myself and I don't know if it fits in
how you're supposed to know for someone else? It's a mad, mad generation leap. Yeah.
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There was quite a few parenting hail fans there, should say.
I was there.
Any trouble makers?
Uh, no, one person came up to me and talked to me and then said, um, I wouldn't
have come up to Rob.
Because, um, I know he doesn't like people coming up to him but I thought it was safe with you. That's nice. Rob's got it fucking made. He's got a reputation as... No, I just I don't mind
people come and say hello but not when I'm with my kids on holiday really like not.
Not in a shower. Well no I don't mind like if it's a normal chat but I'm a
I am a friendly person I make friends on holiday in chat but if anyone comes up to me and goes oh I really like I their I their I their I their I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I'm th I'm th th th th th th th thi tho I'm thi they thi tho I'm they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they thi thi thi thi the thus the tho the tho the the tho they're they're they're they're they're they're they, oh, I really like the podcast that bit were there,
that and Josh really could have a photo.
I'm like, yeah, of course, and I'll do that.
But I find it very difficult to make a friend
with that person after that encounter.
Yes.
Whereas if someone else is just like,
Oh, right.
You know, I'm in a good day or whatever. how you'd normally have a chat. I still don't know how you make holiday friends. I don't know how you do that Rob. No, but if he's just a normal conversation then you can have
an awkward, but if someone has a photo then it makes it weird. It's hard to start of, you know,
you come out from a weird point. It's why people that, you know, like single people that end up meeting their partners after gigs. Oh my word. I'm like that's. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I, that. I, that. I, that, that, that, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, that's like, if someone. that's like, if someone. that's like, if someone. that's like, if that's that's that's that's that's that's that's. that's. that. that. that. that. that's. that's. that's. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th's a weird dynamic to start life off. That is strange. We met because they were a fan of me.
Where did you meet?
Well, basically she followed me on Instagram for six months and then found out where
we used to go shopping and then she popped in and said hello.
We had a couple of photos and then it just blossomed from there.
The main thing we had in common is we both love me.
We really bonded over that actually.
Yeah, we're both huge fans of me.
Just my narcissism, you need some back up.
Bob, yeah.
So we finish off some emails or have you got anything to tell me about your life?
Not really, I don't think.
It's sort of like all the house moves stuff, it's sort of a bit like,
you know when it's like, nothing's funny when you're in it.
It's like, it's like, it's just like boxes
and there's just stuff every, and then I just cut like,
and then you just find stuff.
And there's just shit everywhere.
We're still not done and we're, years in. There's still boxes you haven't unpacked? No but there's still stuff where we're like oh we should do that do you know what
I mean? Oh yeah so I was getting a bit down about it was like oh that needs to be
looked at or we need to do that we need to do that and I think sometimes
you get so obsessed about what you need to do you forget what you've took it off in your head so so I'm trying try try try try try so try so try so to to to to to to to to to to to to to try so to try. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the they. they. they. they. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I try. Yeah. I try. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I try. I try. I'm try. I try. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah kids are all good, they're in school just in school really busy with birthday parties we've got holiday coming up in July yeah yeah yeah just sort of
ticking along really no major. Oh very nice very nice. Oh no this happened I
don't know if I told this. What the teacher has gone off on maternity leave so
there's a new teacher in for the last term she came out and said to Lou.
Oh hello I believe you're the class rep, I need to let all the parents know something rather.
No, no, no, that's my husband, Rob, she went.
Yeah, I've been told that as well, but everyone just said it's basically you.
That's not okay, is it?
No.
That's bang out of older.
Yeah.
So do you agree with that analysis? No, Lou organized a Christmas present for the teachers that I didn't do when I was working.
But apart from that, I've been forwarding on all the WhatsApp messages.
Yeah, that's the best thing.
Just because the job is at that demanding, apart from, I do, no, do you know what's happened?
I feel a bit like Donald Trump, you know when he got in? There's certain things I th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thinks I thinks I thinks I thinks I thin I thin I thin I thin I thin I thin' thin' thi thi thi thin' thin' thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi that I that I that I that I that I'm that I'm that I'm that I'm that I'm thi thi thi thi thi th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thii thiii thi thi thi thi thi thi thi that I that I thi I think I should be doing, but the other parents have sort of gone, he probably won't be able to do that or won't do it or forget. So let's just take that away from him
and we'll just get on with it. So I feel like I'm a bit like I'm marrying as the figurehead,
but I'm not actually doing anything. And they go, I'm just tell him, just tell him, yeah,
just tell him that he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he has he has he has he has he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has has that he has has has has has has that he has has has has has has that he has has that he has has that he has that he has Boris, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, he has has has, he has has, he has has, he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he has that he him that he has to afford on the WhatsApp and he'll do that and he feels like he's doing a job so but I'm quite happy with that
actually you know I'm happy to accept that as my fate but oh yeah that was
that they needed them class helpers to the parent volunteers to go on a
school trip to like Drew Sillers Park or something like that which is that's a serious long that and that is that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that is a that isthen I sent it on the parents group, no replies, absolutely nothing, right?
And then the text went out to see what dads wanted to play football on the Sunday.
Loads to their trips, their dad's not getting much traffic on the parent group about the school trip,
but you want to play football, just saying that. And they're all right yeah nothing major to report from that we've got
on solo parenting for three or four days when Lou goes to watch Beyonce in
Amsterdam so I'm sure plenty to report there and then next week we'll have
come back from Glastonbury so that's something to look forward to yes
God knows who knows anymore what's that noise? The police oh don't get. that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the tho. tho. tho. tho. I I thoo. thoo. thoo. I thooo. I tho. I tho. I tho. I tho. I knows anymore? What's that noise? Uh, the police. Oh, don't get that around my way. Now I'm in the countryside, now it's very calm.
No, exactly. I tell you what I'm doing a lot of though, pulling over, pulling over. Oh, yeah,
yeah, where you go in. I'll get really close to the bush but not touch it. Oh, well, I don't want to talk about it. I don't get in the card in line.
Hey!
Really good actually.
I really enjoyed that.
It's really good fun.
Right, let's do a quick correspondence and small business and then.
Okay, you do a correspondence then I'll get my small business ready. Okay, here we go. to burn genital the gen't. the gen't. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. thin. thin'. thin'. thin'. thin'. thin'. thin'. thin'. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thirty. Really. that. Really. th. Really. th. that. Really. th. Really. th. Really. Really. Really. th. th. Really. Really. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. t. t. t. t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t ttttttttttttttttt tttt tttttttttttogether. tt I just had to reach out and tell you this story.
I was trying to burn my genitalia but failed. You should come around and pop it on my light.
I had to reach out and tell you this story after something you mentioned on the podcast.
It was a story about a woman touching her husband's penis with oven. So here's my tale for you. Years ago, my cousin put something in the oven.
I remember that when she grabbed his no opener.
Years ago, my cousin put something in the oven,
it's worth pointing out the oven door opened from the top and then jumped in the shower.
When he got out, he put on his dressing gun and went to check his dinner. As he's squatting down to check the food, his balls stuck to the hot glass.
Oh my God. Oh my God.
Oh my God. This is a, I get it, top down so it's like a bake-off oven on the floor.
Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. How low are his balls? Oh my word. So he's straggled. He's basically squished. He's strapped. He's strapped. He's strapped. He's strapped. He's basically. He's basically. He's basically. He's th. th. th. th. th. th. thawlossed. thawlossed. thi. thi. toed. toed. toed. toed. toed. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, he's toed. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, th. Oh, to. Oh, to. Oh, to. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, he's basically squatted over the door of the oven.
And his pendulous testicles have landed.
It's huge, wobbly low nuts.
As he's squatted down to check the food, his ball stuck to a hot glass, he had to peel them off
and go to hospital with them in a pint, in a pint glass of ice.
Oh my god.
Red balls and red face.
Thanks for the last Ellie and Cormall. They're fucking weird. It's a callmall for you, isn't it? Oh, don't. There's a lovely place. You down there with old Red Nuts. Jamie Rednuts?
Jamie Rednuts! You do sketches and a dressing gown. Oh my god, that is awful. We've had loads of
correspondence so we'll do some correspondence episodes. Some more of them coming up. Right. Small-term listener here. I listen since day one. tho. the the their. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there there there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. there. th. th. th. to. to. to. to. to to to to to to to to to to thoo. thooooo. there. there. there. there. there. there. more of them coming up. Small Business, what you got, Josh? Hi, Rob and Josh, long-term listener here. I listened since day one, even though I had no
kids. I have one kid now, a full-month-old, so I'm in the trencures, as you would say. I want
to see if you give a shout-up to my best friend's small business. She's a photographer who takes photos of babies and works like a powerhouse whilst raising two beautiful boys.
Her style is beautiful and she has so many returning customers because she gives so much
time and works so hard.
She's based in Essex, Biller Ricky to be exact.
As a studio at the end of her garden, she spends all her time taking and editing her photos
that wanted to try and help her with some exposure.
Her Instagram is at Little Pickles, plural, photo, little pickles photo. Thanks, Sam.
Lovely stuff. I've got this one here. This is Hannah in Surrey near Dawking. Hi, Josh
and Rob, I would really appreciate a small business shout out for my mother-in-law's
dyslexia testing center. She bit the bullet and quit a job and set it up recently.
If you're looking for a dyslexia assessment assessment children or adults, then check out her website.
Dyslexia Dyslexia Dyslexia, Dyslexia, Dyslexia,
Dyslexia, Dys-L-E-X-I-A, which is an absolute joke of a spelling for people with dyslexia.
They've got to change it. It's an old cliche, observation of comedy joke.c.c., fucking joke of a word. Dyslexia Test Center.co.
UK, I know that your podcast reaches far and wide
and all the assessments are run online
so it can be accessed anywhere in the world.
Can't wait to see you sexy beasts at the O2.
And this is an old message,
especially as I get the night off from my three-year-old and six That's Hannah in Surrey near Dawking. Dysfaxia Test Center.co.
tho-Doh-Doh-K.
Thank you very much, listen.
I'll see you next time, Josh.
The morning, sorry.
Too chilled now, aren't you?
Just too chilled, see you tomorrow.
Tomorrow? All right, Friday.
Bye.