Parenting Hell with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe - S8 EP17: A GIRAFFE AT THE BRIT AWARDS

Episode Date: March 5, 2024

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Hello, I'm Rob Beckett. And I'm Josh Winnockham. Welcome to Parenting Hell, the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent, which I would say can be a little tricky. So, to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern-day parenting, each week we're chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping. Or hopefully how they're they're th'll also be hearing from you the listener with your tips, advice and of course, tales of parenting woe. Because let's be honest, there are plenty of times when none of us know what we're doing.

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Josh. Can you say Beckett? Josh? Tock! Winnie! Winnie! There's the way come. There's There's the. Oh, that's gotto'e.

That's got to be the cutest we've ever ran. It was lovely, wasn't it? But Bowden, uh, Bowden, Bowden, not like the clothes, B-E-A-U as in Boe, D-B-D-D-D-N-B-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-E-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-T-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I BEAU as in Bo, D-E-N. Thanks for the last is my son, Bo-D-A-U. I'm googling. Bodin? Is it a boy or a girl's name? It's a boy.

This is my son, Bowden, 18 months old. Doing well for 18 months. Sorry, Josh, she finds weird and hilarious. Rob. I bought tickets for the Cheltenham gig of your tour in the pre-sale. Yes, good on you. Is she Australian or New Zealand? Because I found a Bowden that's a rugby player. She's, well she's from near Cheltenham. She's from Hereford. Oh, well, okay.

I thought my luck was in. Tickets were right near the front, toto realize I'm second row from the back. That's bloody better the way Beckett picks on the front row. That'll be roasted. From Jess and Bodie. Oh good, thank you very much buying tickets. I'll see you there. Thanks everyone that's bought tickets to the tour. I'm very excited. Previews are going well. Good, good. P.S. the previews are to to to to to go. Prevue. Prev. Prev. Prev. Prev. to. to. to. to go. to. to go. to. to. to. to go. to go. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be. to be th. th. th. the th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the way. the way. the way. the way. the way. the way. the way. the the way. the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. B. th. th. th. B. B. th. th. th. the. the. t t t t t toda. today. today. t today. today. the. the. the. the. the. th speak about adopting. I'll be honest with you, Jess, we haven't been offered her and turned her down. We would take Dawn French. We would not 100% take Dawn French. Yeah, I'd love Dawn French. Tour shows going well, Rob, I did a preview on Friday on Thursday. Oh, how's it? I hadn't had any time to work on it between the gigs. Yeah, that's my problem. I keep I I I I I I I I I I I I the I the I the I the I thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the. I the. I the. the. the. the. the. the. the. We haven't th. We haven't th. We haven't to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have to have th. We've th. We've th. We've th. We've th. We've th. We've the. We've the. We've the. We've the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. theate. theateate. thea. toea. We've toea. toe. toea. We haven't to have to have to any time to work on it between the gigs.

Yeah. Yeah, that's my problem. I keep going, I'll order this and I never do. Yeah, yeah. And then Stephen Merchant's on before me and it's so well ordered. Yeah, exactly. He's perfectly written jokes. I've had a nightmare getting Steve a and at least one friend working progress gigs.

I was chatting Steve a merchant a thing and I said, well, I'm doing these gigs if you want to do some gigs. He's basically said yes to all of them. So now I go on after probably one of the greatest comedy minds this country has ever produced. Yeah. And it is hard. It's like altitude training. It's so funny. And they're not, he's not just funny. It's so well put together because he's brilliant at that sort of structure of it. My, I just look like a mental. My structure really does come in later the day. Very much pulling a charter shop. Yeah, anyway. Anyway, Rob, let's talk to you. We will go on to parenting,

but there's been an incredible demand online for the first exclusive interview. Shall I break my silence? With the giraffe from the Brit awards? That's what they were saying the things where they, if someone runs an article about something, they go, Rob Beckett breaks his silence or, you know, Jerry Horner breaks her silence

by kissing Christian Horner at the Bahrain Grand Prix, stuff like that. Yeah, can I just say, I've spent the last month of my life dealing with the fact I work with Bigfoot from my singer. Now, and now I'm the guy that works for the giraffe from the Brit Awards. Yeah. I'm basically a modern-day rod-hull. You've got your hand up our asses. I've got my hand up your arse, and my other hand in the bloody cash register.

I see you guys put my kids through school. You're not getting a cut of my tour. No, but it's good. It all reflects back on me, Rob. It all reflects back on me. The last leg figures go up. Yeah. Our listening figures go up.

What am I doing? I'm dressed in a stripy t-shirt. I don't give a fucking shit. It's going to have a big impact to your career. Maybe they'll start spelling your name right on the TV guy. Well, we'll come to that. Well, don't, so for big. Talk me through it from the start, yeah, for people that don't know. Well, yeah, I went to the, I was invited to the Brits to give out an award and I decided to wear an inflatable giraffe. So basically I was doing this and Lou was like getting a nice dressing all sort and I ate dressing up to these things and I found it so awkward the bridge. Is it black tie?

It would have been a suit wouldn't it? No, everyone's dressing like men. Yeah, I would have worn a suit but like everyone's dressed up. Everyone's dressed up like everyone's. We're all friends. We're all friends with Joel. We're all friends. We're the the the the the of course he has Rob of course he has got lovely chest he looked great and I it made me hate him more well so basically no one cares if you're a 38 year old comedian at the Brits at all but you have to do the red carpet no one takes a photo no one really talk to you and if they do talk to you it's like wow what you think of they think of Ray and I the the they they they they the they they they they they they the they they they th th the th th th th th th th th th th th thin th thin thi thi they thi they they they they they to they thi thi they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi to to thi thi to thi to thi thi to thi thi thi to they they they they they they they they she's amazing she's brilliant and then you just sort of sit down. I might be honest about Ray Rob. What's that? Do you know when the

first time I listened to Ray was? Yesterday? Yeah the morning after the Brits. She's I know I know Ray. I know I know right I'm into Ray. I'm into they. How do you know how do you know Ray? Oh no I don't know her music? I'm to to know I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know her. I know her. I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know I know to know her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her her to know her to know her to know her to know her to know her to know her to know her to know her to know her to to to to to to to to to the the the the the to the to know her music. I know her music. I know her music. I know her music. I know her music. I know her music. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I know to. I know to. I know I know to. I know I know the to. I know her music and I listen to I'm not like friends with Ray even though she's South London as well. Anyway so I'll got invited and I talked do you know what no one's gonna care if I go I'm gonna feel really self-conscious anyway wearing normal clothes why don't I just guys an inflatable draft and then it'll get loads of photos become a bit of a thing everyone I want to talk to me and then it's great promo for the tour and the the the the to the to to to to to to to to to to the to to to to to to to to to the to the to the to the to to the to to to to to to to to to to to to the to the to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to too. I I I I the the the the the too. I the the the the the the the too. I the the toldld the too. I to to to the to to the to to then I'll be on the front of the papers as long as Jerry Horner doesn't kiss that husband after he said. Ginger smile strikes me down again with being all together now all over again. So but I text you about it and I texted my agent and I was like

Dreck and I should do it everyone's like yeah yeah yeah and I felt fine about it all did the suit didn't think you about it and I text my agent and I was like, Dracon I should do it. Everyone was like, yeah, yeah, yeah, and I felt fine about it. All did the suit, didn't think anything of it. Yeah. The day of the Brits, I felt like I was sitting my GCSEs, my driving test, first I was, I was just silent all day like it was's never felt better. She's having a great time. Anyway, so I got the outfit on the, but I was wearing my normal outfit on underneath to get changed into the same. So did you, you, you're getting picked up in a car quite early in the afternoon, right?

Four p.m. I had to have two rum and coke onthe car to the Brits. I've never needed a piss so much of my life. I can't get out of it. Wow you don't want to do that in an inflatable outfit. No, no, so you can't stop at the service. This is a giraffe. And then it's got the inflatable like fan thing which was digging into my back. That was that on. That was that on on. That on. That was on. that on. that. that that that that that was th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to the. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the th. the th. the th. th. th. the the. the thi. thi. thi. thi. the thi. the thi. the the thi. the thi. thi. thi. toe. to. to to to to to properly. And then I had to put the head, once I got to the O2, I had to put my head through the thing, which is quite difficult. I had spare batteries and a screwdriver in my pocket. Also big up Energizer, great batteries. But now I'm not getting paid for this. Energizer lasted me about an hour and a half.

Those little shit batteries they sell you at the entertainer, I think it's the entertainer, the toy shop in Bromley, he went, oh, do you run some batteries? And they were like quite cheap. They lasted about 10 minutes, actually. So I've got that in my pocket, we get there. Can I just ask a question? Yeah, go on. What was the conversation like in the car? Right. So, was the straight, did you have music on

to try and calm yourself or like, because if it was me, I'd probably be listening to like Oasis or something, to try and really like hype myself. No. That in an alpha manner. Do you know what I mean? I had to admit, I did a lot of meditating in the day. So basically my idea was, I'm gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna gonna to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the to to to to the to to to to the thi. I'd to thi. I'd to to to to to be to be to be to be to be thi. I'd. I'd to be to be to be to me. I'd to me. I'd to me. I'd to me. I'd to me. I'd to me. I'd to me. I'd to me. I'd to me. I'd to me. I'd to me. I'd to me. I'd to me. I'd to me. I'd the to me. I'd the thi. I'd thi. I'd thi. I'd thi. I'd thi. I'd thi. I'd thi. I'd to be thi. I'd to be thi. I'd probably to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to the tour. It'd be good promo. Part of me goes, I don't want to do that because I look stupid. People think I'm a wanker, it looks attention seeking.

They think that anyway. Exactly. I just feel like no one gives a fuck really. And I'm like, oh,, I'm quiet, lose quiet, lose quite nervous. Why go to the Brits at all if you're worried about attention? No, no, no, no, it's sorry. I wasn't. I thought that was a question. No, what I mean is, if you're going to the Brits, have a fucking laugh with it. Exactly. So, yeah. It's quite quiet in the treat. I had to explain to explain to explain to explain to explain the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. th. th. th. thine thi. thi. the the thi. thi. the thi. the the the the the thi. the the thiouinathe a the thi. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thattentententententen. thatten. thatten. thatten. thatten. tension. tension. tension. tension. tension. tension. tension. tension. tension. tension. tension. tension. tension. tension. tension. tension. tension. threat. I had to explain the outfit to Dave, the driver, who didn't know what was going on. Just to be clear, not the Brit award-winning rapper.

No, no, not Dave. Not that Dave. I haven't got him driving me. Anyone, no, in the car's quiet. Have you explained it to the driver? Yeah, but he doesn't really understand. and like also he thought he basically was I should have had Jewelleep or someone I've got this fucking idiot driving for the Brits I'm Jewelley my Kylie who have I got this moron yeah anyway so you get out the car but I have to time the inflation because I can't get out with it out inflate I can't

I can't inflate it in the car I won't be able to get out the car yeah and what's Lou do is Lou worried th the th th the th th th th the th th th th the the th th th th the th th th the th th th the the th th to th th to th to to to to to to to to to to to th the the the to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is th is the the the though though toy. true though though though though threat though though threat though th th th th or I won't be able to get out the car. Yeah. And what's Lou do? Is Lou worried about getting out the car with you? She's... And being caught in friendly fire. Lou does not like attention. No, alone being like the plus one of a twat. The plus one of a twa- Well, we need to, really, we'll get Lou on so you can talk. So anyway, I get out of the car and then it doesn't inflate Josh. And if you think the inflated giraffe looks sad, the flaccid giraffe neck on top of a man trying

to flog at all is one of the saddest images you'll ever see. And then basically Lou shuffled round behind me and Lou helped me because I'm my head went because I couldn't get to the thing to inflate it. Which one? Anyway, I get it inflated and as soon as I'm in there, I'm in work mode and it's fine. I think actually there's a safety to being in there. Because in a, uh-oh I'm in a car I'm just rob this little fat loser from South East London that is scared of everyone and everything and now

I'm that knob off the telly. And now you are the Geoffrey from Toys R Us. Yeah, so as soon as I'm in there it's easier because I'm just basically at work. Was it hot? No, it's freezing because it was like an industrial estate. And what are you wearing underneath? A t-shirt jeans and shoes, right? So has Lou got a carrier suit?? She's holding my jacket and I was on a coat hanger and I went do you want to hold on the coat hanger and I went I don't hold on a fucking coat hanger I look like your assistant I'll just put it over my arm. Yeah. So she carried it

under arm. You know what? She's right. So then I'm wandering around having photos and then Lou loves Green Day? Yeah. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their their their their their their their their their l lue. their lue. their lue. their lue. Lue. Lue. Lue. their lue. their lue. Lou loves. Loo. Loo. Loo. Loo. to to to their loo. their loo. their their their their their their their the coat. Lo. Lo. Lo. Lo. Lo. Lou. Lou. Lou. Lou. Lou. Lou. Lou. Lou. Lou. Lou. Lou. Lou. Lou. Lou. Lou. Lou loves. Lou loves. Lou loves. Lou loves. Lou loves. Lou loves. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. L. to to to to to to to to to to to to t. L. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the the the She's got tickets to Green Day, right? Yeah. Because she lied to me about the music she liked when we first met. Okay, yeah. She said she was into like Indy, like Libertines. She hates it. Yeah, she likes Green Day and JLS. Yeah, quite. Well, that's quite broad taste in a way. There's a few people lead singer from Green Day. Right not Billy Joe Armstrong. The other one said humping me from behind, humping the giraffe. Because they're fucking rebels mate. I'm American idiot. You don't put a giraffe in front of the base player from

green they're not expecting to fuck it up the ass. Time of your life. They are the most American people. It's like they were created in a lab. Yeah, I saw the picture of Green Day. The punk look doesn't really hold when you're in your 50s, does it? It was like Madame Tussauds, the live show. The face, he was penetrating a giraffe. His face didn't move, not a flicker.

Absolutely nothing. So I'm not getting rogered by the geyser from Green Day. Lou's, like, I've never seen a more jealous. Yeah. Wish it was me and a giraffe. Can I ask a question? I don't know how to put this without offending Green Day, but I don't think they're listening. Lou asked me to keep the outfit. outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit outfit to to the outfit the outfit the outfit the outfit the outfit the outfit the the the the the the the the the the the the the they they this without offending Green Day but I don't think they're listening. Lou asked me to keep the outfit on me going yes. Yeah yeah yeah yeah.

We didn't get one photo of us in nice clothes there's only me and the giraffe. Was there any Green Day seaman on the giraffe that possibly I could keep as a couldn't say. Just put it in a little tin with some tickets stuff. No, did you, while dressed as the giraffe, and I mean no offence to Green Day, see anyone that you like respected? No. Right, okay. Because I'd really, no, there is, in a minute. Okay.

Was it basically, there, a couple of people a bit annoyed. So when we sat at the table later on, we was on there, to Top Boy, you know Ashley, Ashley, Ashley's an actor now. He was he was there and he was chatting to the guy who plays Marley. You weren't dressed as a draft just in normal clothes. I put my jacket. I'm jumped ahead a bit. We'll go back to the red carpet bit but I was at the table so it's a lady from Downton frog it frog it I don't know. I don't know. Can I ask a question there? Because I'd have are you told who these people are? Because otherwise I'd have a fucking nightmare. Because I'm not like there's the guy that played Bob Marley in that film I haven't seen. No, unless he's in

character. Yeah, in which case I'm like what the fuck's going on here, Bob Marley? Also as well if you look? That's right, well, what are you in, Down and Abbey? Yeah. So my guess is a drag boy, what's that, Rupole? Yeah, my guess is a top boy, Bob Marley, down to the guy of Kingsy I think his name is, I couldn't remember everyone's own, and they were talking about lawyers in LA and it was quite a serious actor chat and then there was Jamie Winston with Melanie Blatt from All Saints but and and the lady from down to the abbey and then it's weird isn't it because people I remember that episode when we asked what your dream dinner party would be. It's amazing they managed to get them all

at one place. I mean I'd say between all of us we had nothing in common. We got a good go. They were all lovely. Was Lou the only as other people brought partners? Yeah so that they're so yeah someone was with their friends someone with the agent Jamie Winston's friends. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. their th. their th. their th. th. their th. th. th. th. their th. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their d. their d. their d' their d' their d' their d' their d'eemed. their d'a. their their their their their their their their their yeah, someone was with their friends, someone with the agent, Jamie Winston's friends with Melanie Black from All Saints, but she had like a suit jacket on her glasses and at the start I didn't realize it was Melanie black from All right. So we sat down and it's a little bit awkward

because no one knows anyone. We're only there because we're giving out awards. Yeah. And then, it was like, yeah, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, how, the, the, the, the, the, the, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, the, the, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like fucking prick dressed in a giraffe got in my way. He didn't know that I was a lot nightmare. The things people will do for a bit of press. It was good looking though, wouldn't he? Great ass on him. He was just like, Mona, and that was quite funny. The point, what would happen in the sitcom is the giraffe, the giraffe in your bag would inflate by mistake and come up next to you.

So Lou's loose loose it's completely got at this point was that we'll get back to recover but she met green down the red carpet right and there are a fate another photo with and that but she's had to have a photo with her with her husband just as a giraffe with green day right yeah so she said that anyway when we sat at thetable, it's all quite overwhelming and the ladies from the Britscombe went, oh here you go Robin Lou, Kylie Minogue's giving you a bottle of her wine and she signed a bottle of her wine and Lou's like, oh okay thank you and then, Lou's like I've been watching down to Nabby catching up on it and I've just watched her every day for six months, I'm going to a bit mad and it is quite an overwhelming experience. Can I just ask a question?

Why is Kylie sent over a bottle of wine? No idea. Right. Right. And she doesn't know. All right. All right. Right.

So, I sit down. the start of the show? Roman Kemp and Mai Jamma and Clara Anfro talking about Love Island and we're going to do a kiss cam and we're going to put everyone in the kiss Sam so we want you and Lou to be on the kiss cam. Lou's face is like, oh my God. She's like I have a ventilator and I was like do what he Lou and lose her what the fucks and then I kissed her and then she grimmist after I kissed her. Yeah comedy chops mate. Well I don't any so shit poor Lou was she knows what she's bloody doing. We're back to the red carpet and then we do the Green Day thing go around the corner now I'm getting interviewed of people which is good I'm getting all that stuff I wanted it's quite shameless sort of plug in and then I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I the the the the the the the the th th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I'm I'm th th th th th th th th got th got th. th. I'm th got th. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm to th. I'm to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm the. Yeah. I'm the. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm the. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm th. Yeah. I'm getting all that stuff I wanted. It's quite shameless sort of plug in. And then I get around to, lad, they go, lad I wanna talk to you.

Okay, of course, fine, lad barabwe're there. And then as his geese are dressed, he's like a big shoulder, American geese are short, big shoulders, weird, long air, so they go, okay, thanks, and they move him on and they go, Ladbar want to talk to you and he goes, who the fucks this guy? And I was like, oh hello mate, I went, they've just, because they were like, they were like, they've asked, get out of him, they're. to. What, what, what, what, what, what, what, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, the, the, the, to, to, to, to, to, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, the, I, I, th. I, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tha, th. tha, th.'m pumping on adrenaline. I heard how fuck off, will you? And he was like, yeah, what are you doing it, man? I'm like, he went, get out of my towel. I'm like, mate, I'm from, you don't, we don't need you here.

I like, mate, it's South London. And it's an interview for Lad Bible. I've never been to the Brits in South London talking to Ladby, but this is this is it. And then he went off and then my costume started deflating and that was quite degrading because of the new batteries. Anyway, I've done the red carpet and now Lou always said, do the drafting but don't wear it for the dinner or giving out a war. Because that is a bit disrespectful and a bit of a the need. Do that a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, a bit, and a bit, and a bit, and a bit, and a bit, and a bit, and a bit, and a bit, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, and then, the they, the, and then, and then, and then, and, and, and, they, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, the the the the the the the the the the the, and, the the the the the they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, they. And, th. And, they. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, tha. And, tha. And, tha, tha, get as we get around the corner you have to wait for another car to take you from the red carpet to the venue right. I ducked around a corner and I think oh there's no one here right. I've basically got to take the draft costume off, take my vest off, take my vest off and put on your vest. to be a vest. Why didn't you be hot in the vest? Why didn't you just go to the to wear in to wear in to wear in the to wear in to wear in to wear in to wear in the to wear in the to wear to wear the to wear to wear the the to wear a to wear a to wear a the the to to to to to to to to to to to their so wear. So we're were were were were or to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the their. So we. So we. So we. So we. So we. We. We. We. We. We. We. We're were. We're were. We're were. We're the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the te. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their. I. I the the the the t. t-shirt and my nice jacket, but I have to take my shoes off in order to get the giraffe outfit fully off, but at the moment I've got the trip.

Why didn't you just go to the toilet? There wasn't a toilet and I was going straight to the venue. And I thought I was in a safe area. Anyway, so I'd stripped down. Rio Ferdinand walks in. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Does he, do you know him? I bet you've met him before have you? I haven't met him before? Oh God I have. He lives around the corner. I really want to be his mate. We're neighbouring. It would work. Yeah. I know football. He knows football. Kate's lovely. I get on with her. I know she'll get on with Lou. This could be a great little, like, couples dinner.

I'm bent over, gut out, tits flopping about, trying to get my shoes off, giraffe around my ankles. At this point, R dress. Rehfernan turned around. He's wearing a beige, full-length like fur, sort of like coat thing, fake fur, I think, with a big gold pendant on it. He looks. Like a gangster. Like a gangster from the New York in the 50s. Yeah, but he's six foot six. Yeah. He's like a Greek. He still got it. He still got it. Oh, he's um, but he walked, he walked, he walked, he walked, he walked the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. He's the th. He's th. He's the the the the th. th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. th. th. th. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's. He's th. He's th. He still got it. Oh he's um but he walked the corner. He was so much bigger than me. I once hugged Rio Ferdinand. You're right. And I can still feel the muscles. You know when you can feed it through three layers? Like you've thought, he's so rich. If you felt his body through a puffer jacket, you like, blimy, feel those biceps. Or you cuddle him, you feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, feel, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, them in their butt you can feel like lumps of muscle on their back. Because and I don't want to get too much into it.

You remember him as quite a kind of not gangly but elegant thin player. Yeah. But that was compared to other footballers but when you put him in the context of a normal person. He's been putting the games in and he was absent and I just I was just like this is the most pathetic I've ever felt and he was like You're right mate. What's going on? I was like oh, I've just got to change my top because I got a bit hot and sweaty so I've got a clean top and I've been a dry And he's like all right and he's like we don't don't we neighbors don't we live the other yeah Yeah, and then we got and then we got on after. Swap numbers? We did actually. Yeah, we got. And you know what? I think in a way he respected my vulnerability.

Did you tell him why you were getting chained? Does he know about giraffe? He does now. I wouldn't say that he's on the mailing list. Ha ha ha ha ha! He went up for pre-s. Are you a lot for preser? I'm honestly, once my tore penis is announced, my time at the bath this is going to be an absolute nightmare. What are you going to call you tour?

Do you know yet? No, I don't know yet. Right, it's a lot of pressure on your PR studs. Well, particularly as I'm not, you know, I'm not not do you know what I was thinking about you Rob? Yeah. And I was because I was so impressed with this and I don't know if you're aware of and I mean this is I was thinking this yesterday. So Neil Tenant from the Pet Shop Boys right he says every band has every great band has an imperial face which is the period of their career when creatively and commercially they're just at their peak and th and th and th and th and th and th and their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their thi thi thi thi. I thi. I'm thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. I was so thi. I was so I was so I was so I was so I was so I thi thi thi thi th. thi th. th. I I I they they th. they they they they they're they're they're thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the theeeeeeeeeeeeei thei theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee they're they're the period of their career when creatively and commercially they're just at their peak and everything they do is like just in tune and right and perfect.

And like I feel like these last couple of years I've watched, it feels like you are, I always feel like me, you, Joe, James Acaster, Romish, and you, do you know what I mean? But you are like, this is Rob Beckett, it's Imperial Face, the guy that can go to the Brits dressed as, I know it sounds mad, but to go to the Brits dressed as a giraffe, I think your Imperial Face started when you ate the chicken. Yeah. And it's never reached the point where you're a giraffe at the Brit, so I'm excited to what, and I mean that. I'm excited.

It's amazing. I just don't, I just don't care anymore what people think and I just, I just, I just, I just, I love it, so, I just, in a way, it's sort of like, do you want to do it? And that's all, that's the end. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I just, I just, I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I just, I. I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I'm just, I'm just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm just, I'm. a draft or work event. This is funny though, Lou's, I love Lou's so much. She's so supportive and bless her. She had to go to that while I'm doing that and she's in the background of these videos and all stuff like that. And I love her to pieces and I couldn't do most of your things without her support and stuff. Not that anything I just wore a fucking, I did, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just just, I just just just just just just just just just th. I just thus, I just th. I just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just, I just just just, I just, I just just, I just, I just just, I just, I just, I just, I just just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I just, I've just, I've, I've just, I've, I've just, I've just, I've just, I've just, I've just, I just, I just, I just, I over it. But when we was there, like, because it's a lot of live event, there's a lot of camera people that I know from telly and stuff that were there and floor managers because it's such a big event. Of course, and then there was a lot,

because we was right in the corner, saying hello, I'm's because when anyone walks past, you get their eyes, shake them around and go, hello, I'm Rob. And I was like, oh, yeah. That's properly out. She went, they're not coming up to you, you're going up to them. No, but so that was really good. My mom rang me, I went, oh, I didn't really like that. What, the giraffe thing? I'm thau. I. I. I. I. th. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm, that. I'm, that. I'm, that. I'm probably. That. I'm probably, that. I'm. I'm. That. I'm. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. That. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. It's not. I. It's not. I. It's not. I. It's not. It's not. rather you didn't do that. I mean, I tell you what, yeah. Do you want a new oven? Because you've got one and we wouldn't have it about the fucking giraffe, all right? So wind your neck in and I'll pop mine out.

Hey, that's a good bit of business. Can you confirm or deny what we're all thinking, which is Australia and probably some of the UK, the Palladium, because there's all my London Palladium dates are on sale now. So if you want to come and see me, I'm doing a two-week run at the London Pallion, which even if you don't like me, I think just come and support a guy that used to be a market traider........ Exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. to, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly, exactly. to, exactly. to, exactly. to, exactly,they want to do that. I might put it on. It's hard to get in and out of so I'll probably won't wear it for the tour but yeah a bit of an effort bit of a fucking effort. I'm worried people are going to turn up to the tour in it though because it's all come together, I mean I haven't seen the show, it might be shit.

Yeah, that's the one thing I've got to work on. But it is all come together in the last couple of years where you've totally understood who you are, what you want to do. I sound like I'm like, like, you know, and this is is is this is this is tot is this is tot is tot is tot th is th is th is tot th is th is thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. totally totally totally totally thi. thi. tho-I's thoomo-I's thiol-I. I'm thiol-I. I'm tho-I. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. tooooooooooooo. I'm to. I'm to. I'm to. I'm thi. I'm thi. I sound like I'm into one of those serious, but like, you know, and this is totally stupid, it's just, I found this Rob, we're going back to stand up, that I just really enjoy funny. And there's, you forget about that, do you know what I mean? When you're interviewed about your tour, they're always like, so what's it about? And you just want to go, it's just fucking funny. Yeah, you'll come and laugh. And that's it, there doesn't need to be a point, it doesn't need to be serious. You know, you just got to get people aware of it,

get him in the room and make them laugh and they'll leave happy. Someone in Guilford has spent 30 quidtm. They want they they they they they they they they they want they want they want they want they want they they want they want they they want they want they want they they they're they're th. Someone th. Someone th. Someone thi. Someone thi. Someone they're they're they're thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. Yeah. th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. th. Yeah. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. they thi. they they thi. they they're thi. they they they're thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. getting it hard. Josh, we talk about parenting. Oh yeah, yeah. And then we'll talk about you being a smart TV. Because let's think parenting and then smart TV is getting. It's a bit working. But it's quite a busy work period for us guys. Well, I think, I think people have come to this episode, hopefully some of the Brits. Some brit. I want to be wanting their. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thin. th. thi. thi. thin. th. Let's th. Let's th. Let's th. Let's th. Let's th. Let's th. Let's th. Let's. Let's. Let's. Let's. Let's. Let's. Let's. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let. Let's. S. So. S. S. S. So, th. So, th. I. S. I. S. I. I. I'm. S. I'm. S. I'm. I'm. th. th. th. th. S. I th. th. th's various episodes where it's a special event. Yes, yeah, but no, I've got some good parenting stuff though. Go on this week. I've had a busy weekend, so I took my, oh so first of all, loads happen this week actually. First of all, my daughter, I told my daughter's in a football team.

Yeah. I missed her first game though because I was at work, but I'm going to her second game on Tuesday. I missed the first game, but she scored a goal. Oh, yes, please. And then Lou text me and I burst into tears. Oh my word. So I don't know what traumas that's unlocked. Yeah, yeah, that's something deep.

Yeah, I don't want to start scratching at that, but every time she scores I burst into tears, even if I'm not there. Yes. So that is, I was backstage at the National Fish and Chip Awards, but the awards was great, so I'm not blaming them, that was great. Winston Churchill impersonator was there, have I told you about this? No. There's Winston Churchill impersonator? Anyway, if you're interested in the best fishing ships of the country, ship deck in Kafili. Anyway, so I, yeah, so something deep is going on there, so I'll have to keep an eye on the old football thing.

Yeah. Then on Sunday, I took her... You went to the football with her. Yes, so I took her to her first ever football match. First interest toers. Well, I kept on crying I kept on, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho, I kept on, I kept on the, the, the, the, the, the, the, yes, yes, yes, so, tho, yes, yes, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so. So, so, so, so, yes, so. So, yes, the the the the the the the the the the the the. So, I was the. So, I was thea, I was thea. So, I've thea. So, I've thea, I'm thea, yes, I've the. So, yes, so, going on. I think the Brit is probably more stressful than you thought. 100% and you're in a weird mental space because of it. Yes, because it was normally I would have just tacked out of that through being anxious. But I used to not be able to go to kids parties when I was younger because I was so anxious. So yeah. What's in the way is the way. So if you're scared of a roller coach, you're scared of a party, just go. That's how I operate now, but it

doesn't mean it's not emotionally exhausting. Not, yes. I'm not looking for sympathy, but if I've just done that and there's a bit of pride that I've faced a challenge, if I'm at the football with my daughter that is into it and loving it and now I'm seeing an an an opportunity an opportunity an opportunity an opportunity an opportunity an opportunity to be an opportunity to be an opportunity to be in opportunity to be in opportunity to be in opportunity to be in opportunity to be in opportunity to be in opportunity to be in to be in to be in to be in to be in to be in to be in to be in to be in to be in to be in a the the to be in to be in to be in to be in to be in the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. thoooooooooooooom. I'm. I'm. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm and now I'm seeing an opportunity to be into football my daughter for the next 20 years. Yeah. Yeah, sure. I did cry when Russo scored against Tottenham ladies and tried to cuddle my daughter not let us see. Yeah, of course. But he was amazing though so he went and watched a football. But I got a boogey experience Josh because I got invited by the Barclays WSL and they said do you want to come and watch and I was I I I I I I that I that I that I that I that I that's that's that's they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're to to they're to they're to they're to to they're they're they're to to they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're to they're to to to they're to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to try. I try. I've try. I've got so so so so so. I've got so. I've got so. I'm try. I'm they're they're they're they said do you want to come and watch it and I was like that would be perfect as the women's Super League just super league just super league yeah so it's it's Arsenal versus Tottenham at the Emirates and they've been selling out 60,000 people more people yeah went to the Arsenal Tottenham game than the Manchester Derby because the stadium's bigger in London it's an amazing experience and I look I love I love I love. I love I love I love I love I love football football football football football football football football football football football football football football football football football football football women women women women women women women women women's football is two different experiences. I cannot in good faith take my children to men's football. No. It's too toxic. When they're

older maybe if they're 15-16 I think I'd take them but it's swearing, it's aggressive. It's unpleasant. It is unpleasant. When I go to watch Plymouth away now and you you don't get to choose where you go when you go to an away match obviously you're just is is is is is is is their their their their their th. th. their th. th. It is th is th is th. It is th is th is th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's thoes to to to to to to the. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the th. th. th. the the th. the th. the the. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th you don't get to choose where you go when you go to an away match. Obviously you're just thrown in. There is, it's a weird thing to say, the fucking edge is insane. It's hot. There's too much, not everyone, obviously, there's a lot of people, it feels like there's a lot of cheap cocaine going around.

And expensive ones. But don't get me wrong. I do love a the the th. A th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I th. I th. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I the. I'm a the. I'm a the. I'm a tho. I'm a the. I'm the. thoome. thea. thea. thea. It's, thea. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. It. It. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's a. It's a to. It's a to. It's a to. It's a to. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a th. It's a the love the bit of that. I love a bit of like, but not cocaine. I love cocaine. I love cocaine. How did I get me wrong. How did I get through the Brits? So I tell you it was a long way down with that neck on. I feel like men's football's like train spot in the film where women's footballs are like American pie where you're still you can like everyone was still booing the Tottenham players shouting at the raref it was still still that atmosphere of football but but people go but there's no there's not as much passion in women's as men's but I think screaming you fucking get up you shit I think I think I think there's a lot of people who are putting

too much of their emotional well-being in the back of football teams. 100% and I don't know whether that passion is a good thing for your life. I agree. So we were still singing we ate Tottenham and stand up if you ate tot and they're still going on but it was a bit... we're still having a laugh. We there. there. there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there's there. there. there. there. there there there. there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there there th. I tho tho tho to to to to to to to to to to to to to to tho tho tho thoo the there's there's there's there's there's the. I've so we were still singing we ate Tottenham and stand up if you ate Totten. They were still going on but it was a bit more. We're still having a laugh. Yeah, we still boo them and hate them and cheer when they go down. Yeah, you were cheering an injured woman. That's fine. And you know what, that is a quality because I didn't care what gender they were. I would laugh at a lovely experience and a great introduction to football without all the, I think my daughter would have been scared off of it a bit, because

it's so aggressive. Anyway, it was brilliant, I thoroughly recommend it, and especially going to the arsenal because it's a full stadium, you know, it feels like a proper atmosphere, it's not like half empty, which sometimes it can be. But what's interesting? So I got invited to it and I was like, do you want a couple of tickets to go? And I thought, right, it's a midday game on a Sunday. That's perfect because my other daughters at a party.

Anyway, I get there. Look at the tickets. the trying to take photos of my daughter at the ground and with me, but then I'm having to do loads of it. And that is fine, but her first experience of football was like just waiting for me to have photos. So I'm like, oh God, it's just going to be like this. Anyway, we get to the thing. I don't really look at the ticket and realize to realize to realize to realize to realize to realize to realize to realize to realize to realize to realize to realize to realize to realize to realize to realize to realize to realize the to realize I the the the the to realize I realize I realize I realize I realize we the the to realize we're their. We're their to realize we're to realize we're their. We're the. We're the. We're the. We're the. We're the. We're the. We're the. We're the. We're the. We're the. We're the. We're the. We're the. We're the. We're. We're. We're. We're. We're. I. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I's. I. I. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. the. I'm. ti. ti. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. the. I'm. I'm. I'm. of football. We go in an elevator up two floors. We walk in, get seated at a table where there's a buffet and a table service. Oh my God. Ian Wright is being interviewed. Amazing. My childhood hero is being interviewed. She doesn't know who he is. No idea. Just a man talking while she's trying to eat chicken nuggets. Anyway, so we do that and then she gets given some sweets as we go out out out out out out out out out out out out. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. they. I th. I their. I th. I their. I their th. I their their their their their their their their their their their they. I's, their. I's, their. I's, their. I's, their. I's, their. I's, their. I's, their. I's, their. I's, their. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's, I's, I's, their their. they. they. they. they. they. t. they. ta. they. I'm. they. I'm they. I'm they. I'm they. I's sweets as we go out to sit on these leather seats

that are heated. Oh my word. She sat there, she went, I love football, I bet you fucking do. This is our first game. My first game was Arsenal Topnum and we were in the Arsenal old hybrid next to the totnall fan, a totna fan ripped a chair out of the ground and threw it and it landed on my head. She's got a warm ass. And then she was like, well we went up with her sister before and she went, where's Beth? Where's Beth? I was like, she's up there and she went, oh God, right.

When can we sit with her next time? I was like, yeah, but it's quite different to where we sat now? And I was like, th, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, but, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, the th, th, the the th, the the they, they, the the the, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, they, went, well, went, well, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, was the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the they, went, went, went, went, went, went, went, to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the the have a well he'd see? No, no, no, you will not. But I put my Stone Island jacket on her lap just to give her a better taste of the real stuff. Of course, of course. And did she enjoy the full 90 minutes or did she get bored? Do you know what? She absolutely loved it? And it was, it was, it was, it was absolutely loved it and it was yeah she was Arsenal good I don't know really so they're much better in Totten they were all over them talking about a couple chances but they scored and

she loved actually working out who the players was who her favorite player was looking at the numbers on the program and all that she got a hat and it was so cute and just seeing her at Arsenal a little hat and a little hat and a little I was, I was, so that's when I was like, oh my God, I'm in football with my daughter and she loves it. So yeah, it was a brilliant day. So that was, I would thoroughly recommend women's football. And yeah, it's a different experience, but I think it's a better introductory experience for kids and families, and don't be scared off of going.

And for the, and Ian Wright said, this This lady asked a question, he said, how do I explain to my all boys school about women's football and why we sort of need to support it and stuff like that and what are my answers if they say, oh it's not as good as men's football and things like that. And he said basically, and I didn't know this, that women were banned from playing football in 1921, it was illegal, and then they were illegal basically and they were their their their their to their to be illegal, thied thied thied to be illegal, thied thied to be illegal, thied thied themed themed themed themed themed to be themed.. And themed, themed, themed, themed, themed, the, the and was, the, the, and to to to to to to the, and the, and the, and the, and the, and th. And, and th. And, and th. And, and th and th. and th. and th. and th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, th. And, thee, thee, thee, the, the, the an the an the an the and. And, and the an thean, and thean, and thean, and the an thean, and the an the an the an the an the and. And, and then they weren't allowed to play against 71. So it was 50 years because women's football was massive in the 20s and then they stopped it. And basically he said in any industry if you one gender wasn't allowed to play it for 50 years, of course there'd be a gap in the sort of the levels, but that and he was saying that now now there's funding in it and people are coming it and people are coming and watching there's money going into it now. The next generation of players are unbelievable and he said that the next 15 years it's going to jump hugely. Because you know people like Leah Williamson that won the euros was like was it your dream to win it?

It was like this didn't exist when I was a kid. But now there's a whole generation of kids. to go you can play out Wemble and to win a their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. th. thi. thi. their. thi. thi. their. thi. thi. thi. their their thi. thi. their their thi. their the next. the next. the next. the next. the next. the next. the next. the next. the next. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the next. the next. the next the next the next stuff like that. So it's absolutely brilliant. I'm a full convert. And yeah, you can like both men's and women's and I think there's a lot of different stuff and it's much better for families as an introductory at a young age. Obviously when she's older she wants to go men's I'll take her but she can enjoy herself without going why is that man spilling beer on me? I can ask could you control the heating on your seats or is it going the whole the? Now I don't want to, I don't want to complain for my ivory tower, but my ass was too hot. And no one tells you it's a heated seat and I'd had a couple of rum and coaxed and art before at the Brits. And at one point I was like, I can't have messed myself at my daughter's first game. I thought something bad that happened downstairs. And then they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't tell. I don't tell. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell. I tell you. I tell. I tell you. I tell you. I tell. I tell. I tell. I thought something bad had happened downstairs and then when they said it's heated seat I've never been I cheered like a goal.

I don't know. Yeah so that was brilliant I had a brilliant time and I'll tell you about the harvester on the Friday episode. Yeah I've got some parenting stuff on the Friday episode. Do you want to talk about smart TV? The disaster of my weight crop. So we've got a new show. Our new shows is is is is is is is is th show is th show is th. th. tho is th. tho is tho is tho is tho is tho is tho. tho. tho. tho. I's tho. I's tho. I's the. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm the. I's. I'm the. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's. I's.. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. People. They. They. They. They. They. They. They. They. They. They. They. They. They. They. They. They. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. they. People. People. People. People. People. People. it aren't they Josh on the TV guy. I'm not making it. They're bloody all over it. I've obviously signed up to Tick To push it, Rob. Your Tick Tock's are flying, Josh. I'm flying on Tick Tock, Rob.

I'm absolutely at Josh Whitakam if you're a, if you want to follow. I'll just log in there. Log in. I did five on my first day. I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, met. You're like a teenager that's just found out about masturbating. It's not far off Rob. It's not far off. Both times five seconds. Not as many people there as I'd like for the same reason etc. Anyway, so we met some Tik Tockers because we were doing a promo day for Smart TV. Lovely, weren't they? I love them. I loved it.

I was so impressed and do you know what it reminded me of when we interviewed Carol Vorderman on here? And she said, bear with me, and she said, she doesntalks about like talks down to them and they've got and they're just it's so easy to slip into that oh they're not doing as good a thing as that we are do you know I mean we did it right we did TV we did whatever that tick tok's rubbish and it's for losers because they're young and I don't understand backs and they've made their accounts and they've got loads of followers and they're editing their own videos, making their own videos. They're doing, it's incredible.

It's like, it's far better than just going on a load of pannel shows like we did. They're doing it all on their own. Do you know what I mean it's on. Can I say I'm proud of you as well? Thank you. Because when the Tick Tock has come in, your, no wonder you got neck eight, your shoulders went up. Ha ha ha ha. You're body when it's something no and I'm old there young. You nearly hid, and your head nearly disappeared.

Like a little could have done with a giraffe, that's a little. I just went, Josh, shoulders down, it's going to be okay, baby. And you smashed it. Now your TikTok to smash it. However, the biggest one you've got, you are on mute. This was a mistake. My first one I did a music quiz and I was on mute. But that's got more watches. Yeah, people loved it. There was a lot of comments.

I like the person for this and they're not wrong because I deserved it. But you know what? All publicity is good publicity, Rob. I left it up because you've got to show your weakness. Exactly. And I'm all about showing my weakness, Rob. I'm all about it.

Talking about older people being like horrible to TikTok because there was a great interview. You know, the Amelia, oh I can't remember us, you know, does chicken shop date, Amelia. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And she's brilliant and she's on the red carpet, she's so good, but because she came from on YouTube and tick-up. They're all a bit sneer, I think, I I I I I I I I I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. to, to. to. to. to. to. to. to. toa. toa. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. ta. ta. actor, I can't remember his name, but I think it's for June 2, an older guy. And he goes, well, there are any really memorable days on set that you absolutely loved?

And he goes, oh, this is just such a classic Tick Tock question where you really need a short answer, so it works. And basically, no, it's not. It's a fair question. And he's he he he he's gone he's gone he's gone he's gone he's gone he's gone. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. he. th. th. th. th. he's th. th. th. And he's th. th. th. th. th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he's th. And he goes. And he goes. And he goes. And he goes. And he goes. And he goes th. And he goes th. And he goes th. th. th. th. thi. thi. th.to do rather than living in the reality in the moment that it's a normal question, he's gone, it'll probably be some shit weird little tick-toggy thing that I've got a, you know. Yeah. Unlike the great red carpet interviews of your where, oh we've been used to get on the red carpet before it and get in the fucking building. And cash your check in midral bars but she smashes it she he goes oh this is probably just some tick-tock in a view

where where you just ask a question I've got to give a really short answer and she went you can just say no. And ironically made the best Tick-t ever, so it's great. Oh yeah, smart TV, yeah, so then smart TV, which is on Sky, I go on the Sky Plan on the day Rob. Yes. Turn it on. It's on the recording section. Yeah. This is show your weakness, Rob. There's a big picture of you and Allison Hammond. Who's been cropped off the side? Old winners. Oh poor old widers. Yeah.

My name's there, misspell. The ultimate insult. The ultimate insult. But, right? Yeah. I saw that and I thought this is fucking great. Yeah. This is hilarious. This is exactly what you're looking for when you're trying to, because you've got like, you want to send out Instagrams and Tick Tocks to

tell people your shows on, but you don't want to bore them by going, hi my shows on, da da da da. Once you see that you've been cropped off the sky, you're like, this is fucking great. This is an absolute winner. I'm in here. And this spend a day and a half having to reassure people from Sky that are apologizing to you. That you're not incredibly upset. So you're getting texts from people at Sky seemingly by the hour going higher and higher up the food chain. Quite a lot of big dogs. And you're like, honestly? You've got murder and faxed. He said I'm in line for succession. But, um, yeah, that was funny.

You don't know well though, Josh. Oh, it's a bit of fun. You're looking for fun in this life. Exactly, and it doesn't really matter, does it? Enjoy yourself for God say, you're only here once. Even if, even if Allison and Robert here twice. You know, me and Allison get paid more than you, but you know, you've, you're being paid. You're being paid. Ah, I'm dear.

But it's great and honestly, great week. I should, should I just end with a little anecdote, right? Yeah, let's do a little, I think that was a nice sort of balance. And apologies if it's been too work, work heavy. But it's only because when you have a tour announced in a new show, you're constantly on the PR trial but we'll be back in action with a more, I've got a great harvest story for you. Sign up to to to the the the mail up up up up up up the mail up. I to the mail the mail. I to sign up. I I I I I I I to sign up. I've the the to sign up. I've their. I've their. I've their. I've their. I've their. I've got a great, I've got a great, I've got a great, I've got a great, I've got a great, I've got a great, I've got a great, I've got a great, I've got a great, I've got a great, I've got a great, I've got a great, I've got a great, I've got a great, I've got a great, I've got a great, I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've th. I've got a great, I've got a great, I've got a great to to to to to to to to to to th to th th th to th th thirty to th thirty thirty th th th th th th th th, sign up to your the mailing list of Josh Willicum.com. Yes. If you don't want it to turn into this in six months time when my tours announced. As soon as we've sold

all the tickets, we will never mention it again. Okay, Rob. I texted my gardener texted me so I've got a gardener who comes and like just does the gardener. No no, the beds and tidy that. Just cut it again. I'll charge him cutting it here. He's got it really under control. So, he comes at the light start of spring and just doesn't jush. Can I hear birds? Have you got your window open? I've got my window open.

Spring outside, spring has sprung. By the way, Rob, my neck is in the best state. It's been for six months. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the the tho. to to to too. to the to to to to to to me. to to to be. to be, to be, to be. to be. to to to be. to to to be. to to be. to be. to be. to be. to to be. to to be. to to th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the. the the. the thea. the ti. ti. the tea. the touche. the the together. the together. thea. toea. toea., my neck is in the best state. It's been for six months. Why do you think I'm in such a good mood? Anyway, is the radiator still on? Yeah, of course. Can't put it off. Can't put it off. Can't put it off.

I was going to say it's warm. But it is great yet. Exactly. It was fucking boiling when I came up here I tell you that I'm looking for it. This is going to be the new headphones thing because you're not going to get round to sort it out. I know you see you. In terms of things I'm not going to get around sorting out. I've got to show you something on Friday because I'm genuinely worried about it.

Okay, this is all lump is it? So my gardener sent me a text, Josh, how about a visit Monday the 25th of March? I replied one word perfect. Yeah. Just send you a conversation. By the way, I don't really know him that well so. Okay how often does he come just like a couple of times? Yeah okay you've written pervert yeah hi Josh how about my day 25th March for a visit pervert?

Was he replied? Half nine at night as well. Yeah he texted me in he texted me in the morning as well, so it wasn't a straight reply. Did you not know you've done that? No, I knew it straight away Rob. So what did you say? I then sent perfect explanation, exclamation marks. I had a similar exchange. Do you know the magician Ben Hanlon? Lovely fella. He was, we were doing a corporate. I was hosting the award and then he was going on in the middle and I was coming back to do some awards after, but we were never gonna see each other, he was in the same room really.

Anyway, he's gone. Have a good one tonight. I'm a good one downstairs later. I went, oh, you my room, I'll come down just before 930. I say I'm on three times. I had to go on beginning middle end and he's a thing. I went, I'm on, so I replied to him and I don't know that well, Ben. I'm on three times and then I write, fuck now. Okay? And then I write, fuck me. Then I write, ha ha ha. Then I write, not fuck now. And then I said, horrible typo would send someone else to the same hotel room, killing time. And then I wrote it, fuck me is even worse actually.

Jesus, fucking hell. I shouldn't have gone with fucking hell. And then he wrote, no worries, I've got the jizz. Lovely. Lovely stuff. And then I said it might just be easy to have sex to make his says, oh good. And have you worked with him since? No, not seen him. I didn't even see him then.

Just said that and that was it. We just left to be linked. Well, that remand he's got two kids according to his Wikipedia. You'll have three and nine months after what I did to. Right, should we do some small business, Josh? Some, some S-Bs. I've got one. Hi, Rob and Josh. I'm sure there are many families with a difficult decision what to do with baby clothes, which contains so many precious memories, but their small business business business business business business business business.. wife Kaley and her new business once upon a snuggle where she transforms

all your loved and treasured baby clothes hats muslins or even socks and sleeping bags into memory quilts that you can love and snuggle for years to that's that it's a great idea so my mother in law yeah my mother in law yeah made a incredible kind of patchwork quilt my daughter yeah I'm the ley's shout out, not your fucking mother-in-law. Wait, wait! Yes, so my mother-in-law made my daughter a lovely, amazing patchwork quilt, and in it she had put some of the patches were her, one of her comforters from when she was a child, which was like a muslin. And it was great, Rob, so this is up my street.

Great idea. Talk to me more about once upon a snuggle time or whatever it's called. Once upon a snuggle. Using over a decade of professional sewing experience, all your clothes are lovingly altered to create squares, then skillfully sewn into a beautiful quilt preserving all the memories of your baby growing up. She is based in the Midlands but can sew for you anywhere in the UK. Her latest quilts can be found on Instagram. Once dot upon dot a dot snuggle. P.S. please read out the dots. Please read out the dots. Please read out the dots. Stay sexy and relatable. Thank you both for keeping me

through the long nights and stay insane while we embark on the toddler phase. Alex, there you go. Once dot upon dot, a dot, snuggle. Hi Rob, Josh and Michael, I'd love a small dot business shout out. They've written that for my cake business. Not based in Bromley or the southeast but up in Glasgow. Do you think Rishi soon actually does speech about the entrepreneurship of Bromley and how it's th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thing th the the the the the the the the the the the the the tho tho tho tho tho the tho the. Alex the tho tho the. Once th. Once th. Once th. Once th. Once their once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once once the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thou-a' the the the thou-a'-a'-a'-s. Once, thoananan-s. Once think Rishi Soonak should do a speech about the entrepreneurship of Bromley and how it's showing the country up? Because it feels like it's like the ultimate place for commerce at the moment, judging by this podcast. Anyway, I set my cake business, whisked up by L.M. While I was on Mattleaf, I have been making cakes and cupcakes for friends and family for years and decided to go for it. I make all kinds of celebration cakes,

cupcakes, fudge, and some other bakes coming soon. So if your listeners are in Glasgow in the West, in brackets of Scotland, close brackets, check out on Facebook and Instagram at at whisked up by LM, that's W-H-H-I-S-K-E-H-E-D-E-D-E-P,P-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-I-I-I-I-I-I-I th I the-I-M-I-I th I th I to-I to to to to to to to to to-I I I I to-I I I I to-I I I to-I I I to-I I I I I I I I I I I I I to-I-I-I-MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-M-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-H-H-H-H-H-FFFFFFF-H-H-I-H-I-H-I-H-I-I-H-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-H-I-S-K-E-D UP B-Y-L-M. Thank you so much for doing what you're doing. Thanks Lindsay. I always like it when people just say so I went for it. That is such, because that's what we did Rob. Exactly.

Go for it. You'll never regret something you do. Don't say I'm not the kind of person that runs their own business. You won't be till you are. So just be what? Exactly. Yeah. Right. Rob. Yes. I'll see you on Friday. Lovely. I'll see you there. You're looking forward to it? Always. By the way I've just been messaged. I'm going on Lorraine tomorrow and they want me to wear the draft outfit but I've said no. Rob. Rob, correct decision, save it for next week's last lag. Bye.