Parenting Hell with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe - S8 EP20: Susie Dent

Episode Date: March 15, 2024

Joining us this episode to discuss the highs and lows of parenting (and life) is the brilliant broadcaster, lexicographer and etymologist - Susie Dent. Susie runs the dictionary corner on 'Countdown' and '8 out of 10 Cats Does Countdown'. You can listen to her podcast 'Something Rhymes with Purple' wherever you get your podcasts. Parenting Hell is a Spotify Podcast, available everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. Please leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... xx If you want to get in touch with the show here's how: EMAIL: [e-mail] INSTAGRAM: @parentinghell MAILING LIST: parentinghellpodcast.mailchimpsites.com  A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello, I'm Rob Beckett. And I'm Josh Winnockham. Welcome to Parenting Hell, the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent, which I would say can be a little tricky. So, to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern-day parenting, each week we're chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping. Or hopefully how they're they're tha be hearing from you the listener with your tips, advice and of course, tales of parenting woe. Because let's be honest, there are plenty of times when none of us know what we're doing.

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Rob Bette. And can you say Josh Josh, we dicken. No. Okay. There you are. Dad, we get him. Oh, good try. I thought that was good in the end. Yeah. In between gobbling porridge.

Was that you in the background or the clip? That was me. I just can't stop gobbling. I've got a porridge complaint, Rob. Okay. About a major high street chain. Right. Do you want to do the porridge complaint now or should we give this child their moment on the pod? This is my son Louis. Oh, this is exciting, Rob.

Go on. Imagine if it goes, this is my son Louis. People say I've been in hiding for two months, but this is how I come back. I think it's quite worrying though for the future of royal family if the 10-year-old Louis is talking like that, trying to say Josh Ridicolome. This is my son Louis and that's definitely my hand around him. Um. God knows what, this is Friday's episode. Yeah, we recorded this Monday morning if something awful has happened in the intervening four days,

we apologize hugely. But on Monday morning, that was a great bit of satire. You should start last leg like that. Guys, we wrote the jokes when the news was different. Come on. Come on. This is my son Louis who turned to having a go at the intro. Thanks to all the laughs I spent many a nap time walking around the streets grinning like a weirdo and laughing out loud while Louis naps in his pram from Sophia from

Somerset. From Somerset. Southampton. I just tried to steal the Sir. Got Somerset on the mind. Well, thanks for doing that. Do that. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do to to to to to to to to to to to to hear to hear to hear to hear to hear the to hear to hear the to hear the to hear to hear to hear to hear to hear to hear to hear to hear their their their to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their. their their. their their their. their. their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their their their their their their their their their their their their their to to to to to to toooooooooooooooooo. too. too. too. too. too. too. to to to to to to tried to steal the Sir. Got Somerset on the mind. Well, thanks for doing that. Do you want to hear my porridge complaint, Robs? Absolutely. That's what we're here for. I don't want to. I don't want to. I got a porridge from.

toe- in London. I don't think I'd say Café Niro. So it was Friday morning. I was in town. Where do you normally get it from? I don't normally buy porridge. Oh you make it? No, I don't normally have porridge for breakfast. I don't normally have porridge for breakfast. But why are you buying porridge then? Because I normally have like yogurt and stuff at home, but that's quite difficult to buy. What yogurt? Well, where would you buy? Sorry, what are you trying? You're trying to buy a linguine in 1932?

What is it? Where would you buy your breakfast yogurt in Central London? They do like birchure, musl yogurt and stuff. I don't like a birch. I think I'll have porridge. I thrown, I thor. I thuuuuuuuu. I thu. I thu. I thu. I thiii. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thoomoomy. I to thi. Sorry. I to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to thi. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. thi. thi. thi. thi. Sorry. thi. thi. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to thi. to thi. toe. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. to. to. to. to. to. try I'm not gonna sit, yeah, but I wanted to sit down, I needed to sit down and kill some time. So I thought, I'll have porridge. In cafe nearer, well, I was going to Leon, but they didn't have any spare seats. And next door was cafe nearer?

Okay, so you went in there for some, was you getting porridge? Yeah. You'll go to breakfast porridge? No it's not my... How many times? But when you're out? Yeah. Ha! No, but when you're out, yeah he is actually I had porridge every time. Not every time. Okay, if you have, if you need breakfast need breakfast even had breakfast and you're out in London What do you have? Porridge. Yeah Well, what?

No more questions your honor? The last time you need breakfast? What did you have? I don't remember but I what else is there to have? Yoguards? There's also they do like breakfast in Leon they do little breakfast boxes they do breakfast bowls. They do I don't really like eggs from. So I don't like pastries are not a good way to start the day. Okay yeah fair enough but they do like egg pots and stuff like that and healthy ones and avocado and all that. Why do you hate porridge? I don't hate it? What happened to you? My problem, one, porridge is depressing. It's only okay. He's in Café Nero, I'll tell you that for free. It's only okay

if you either fill it with sugar or honey or jam. You might as well have rice pudding at that stage. It's only good for you if you don't have any taste in it. And the people that make water and salt should be burnt at the steak. I agree with you on that. That, oh, in Scotland and I love Scotland, but I think maybe that's what happened. I ordered a bowl of porridge in Scotland because I thought that'll be healthy starts today and I had a spoonful of salt in my mouth and on porridge, you mad bastards? So... What's Nero doing with a porridge? They had, create your own porridge, poster, up in the window. I don't need asking twice.

You put a hat on, apron, you're behind the counter. Making your own porridge. I went in, and I thought, do you know what? I can't even see a... I don't know how they're going to do this. I'm fascinated because they're in quite a small barista area. I can't even see a porridge pie. Can we stop this for a second? Fascinated.

He's all down into that. For a man that don't eat porridge, but it says make your own porridge and you are, your words fascinated. Well,, I wasn't fascinated when I was outside. Why died all? How? No, how? It wasn't when I was outside, because I just presumed they made porridge. I got inside, and it was a small branch, and I'll be honest, there was, I couldn't see where the porridge was going to come from.

I couldn't see a porridge pot. You couldn't see the porridge part. So you couldn't see the the th you couldn't see where the porridge was going to come from. So I couldn't see it. I didn't see it. You don't feel straight away in the coffee shop. Where's the porridge part? So you couldn't see the porridge part. So what? I said, I'll make my own porridge please. And he said, I suspected as much. Yeah. And then I said, I'll have banana. Yeah. They. They the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the their the the the their the their the th. th. the th. thoes. the po. thorough. the poa. the poa. the poa. the popourage. the po po po po po po po po po po po po po po po po po po po po. the po. the po. the po. the po. the po. the po. the po. the po. the po. the po. the po. the po. the po. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I'll. I'll. I'll. thooo. thoo. thorooo. thorough. thorough. thorough. thorough. thoooooo. the poa. the. the. the. th. I. Oh, was the option with honey?

Yeah? So they're the three options you can have? No, they were the three things I went with. Three? So what else is on offer? Uh, do you jams? Your fruits, yeah. You've gone for banana peanut butter and...

Do you know what I got, Rob? I got... He took out a cup of oats, put some milk in it and put in the microwave. Yeah, so what's wrong with that? Right, that's not making porridge to a high street level, Rob. No, I think that is. That's what I'd expect from a coffee shop. Also I'm not a connoisseur of the porridge gobble like you. Who does your pot all morning? He gave me my milky oats. Right?

The milky oats, like milky oats, like oats floating in milk. He didn't measure it exactly. No, no, he's hard, hard shards of banana. Oh, what, like dried. Dr. Oh, no, he's just, he's glugged, he, he's glugged, he, yeah, so I had oats floating in hot milk, some hard bits of banana in a bag, and a small pot of honey. That's a pouring yourself? To pour in myself. You're making your own? I am making my own, Rob. Did you eat it?

No. Did I complain? No? No? Just looked at it. Thought, I'm not gonna, I can't have that. It's milky oats. Still paid for it. Went and waited for a table to come available at Leon.

Had a lovely porridge there. Why didn't you just say, sorry mate, mate? that's. that, that's. that's. that's. that's. tha. tha. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. that. tho. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. the to. the the the toe. toe. the toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. toe. too. toe. toe. toe. to. confrontation. It is. It's not, you've gone, sorry mate, look, that's not really what I asked for, can I have my money back? That's like dry banana and it's all, it's all like watery and milky. That's not a porridge. Yeah, well, I just thought what I'll do

do instead is I'll complain about this. going to be content and I can't even remember why I've brought it up in the first place. And so what did you have at Leon? Lovely ruby red porridge. Exactly, you love... Most people would be scared off a high street porridge at this stage. Well I've had the one at Leon before and it is the best on the high street. I do think that's the best breakfast, I think it's the best, like if you need quick food, it's not cheap the best, like the best, like the best, like the best, like the best, like the best, like the best, like the best, like the best, like th, like the best th, like th, like th, like th, like th, like the best th, like th. thi thi thi the thi, like thi, like thi, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, like, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th, th, th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, the thi. to the thi. It's a great porridge. It's a great porridge. Anything else you wanted to chat about? I'll be honest, I didn't want to chat about that? So I don't know what just happened. A minute ago you said I feel really tired of got nothing to give. I don't know what just happened. A man that denies liking porridge,

was complained about porridge for 10 minutes. Comparing it to other porridge the porridge to to to porridge to porridge to porridge to porridge to porridge to porridge to porridge to porridge the porridge the porridge to porridge the porridge to the porridge the porridge to the porridge the porridge to the porridge to the porridge the porridge the porridge to the porridge to to to the denies liking porridge was complained about porridge for 10 minutes. Comparing it to other porages he's had and admitted to having only having porridge for breakfast when he's out the house. Yeah, so I don't know what's going on. When you're in a hotel, when you've got a big buffet in a hotel? Yeah. What you eat him? What are you eating?

What have I eat in a nice buffet in a hotel? Yeah. You have a little bowl of porridge, in you? No, I'm not. You can have a little one around. You'll grab a little plate of stuff you don't really want, because you feel like you're not making the most of the buffet. And then what you don't like meat?

I'm having. You don't like pastries? No, I do a hotel. I do a hotel buffet, Rob. As a treats yourself. So, depends. On holiday? Yep.

So I'm enjoying myself a lot there. I'm going all in, I'm having pickles, I'm having breads, I'm having pastries. I'm having lunch. I'm having yogurts, I'm having all that kind of stuff, yeah? Yeah, so holiday, that's fine. But not every day, would you do that every two weeks? That's, I don't really, I don't think, as a grown-up, been on holiday for two weeks. So for a week, you'll do that every thi. No, no thi, I I I I I I I I I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I don't thi. I thi. I thi. I don't thi. I don't thi. I don't thi. I don't thi. I don't th. thi. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. tho. th. tho. tho. tho. tho. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. I. I. tha. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm. I'm thaaa. I'm. I'm. I'm tha. I'm tha. Iier to calm it down. You just go for it hell to leather. I don't even, yeah no no no, no. Nutella?

I'm not a big fan of chocolate spread. No, it's far too much fun and tasty. What would you want to accidentally enjoy yourself, would you? Oh dear. Right, what are we doing now, Josh? We've got Susie Dent? Susie Dent. There we go. British Broadcasting Legend.

Yes, we love a bit of Susie Dent. Yeah. Also, can I give a shout-out to Lou's written another blog? If you go to Instagram, Lou underscore, M-E-M, there's a link in a bio to a new blog. It's very good, being the default parent. And everyone always says, we want to hear more from Rose and Lou and their side of things. Obviously we get them on the podcast to chat. Lou is the brilliant writer, so she's written a, Josh. Someone stopped her in the shops. They interrupted us and I'm like, here we bloody go. I probably want to sell it.

You went, oh Lou, I just want to say how much I enjoyed your blog. And do you know what? I absolutely hate it. No, joking. I was so happy for and proud. So yeah, it's a really good blog. Right now Susie-deh-de-in. She is a British TV. She is a British-S-S-S-Si-S, she-S, she is, she-S, she is, she-S, she is, she is, she is, she is a, she-I, th, th, th, th-I, th-I, th-I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I th- I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I I I I, I, I I I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I- I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I, I, I th-I, I th, I th, I th, thu, thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. Loo, th, thu, thu, I just th, I th, I the-I, I th-I, I th Lexiographer, correct? Probably not. Lexiographer? Lexographer? Words. Words are a tool. Yeah, we love Susie. Please welcome. Suzy Dent.

Welcome to the show. Susie Dent. Thank you. Lovely to see you guys, although you can't see me, so apologies. We've got slight signal problems. I'm confident it's you. apologies we've got slight signal problems I'm confident it's you I'm confident it's you from the voice you haven't kind of outsourced this to an impressionist no but that's an idea I've never ever heard anyone doing an impression of me do you do you both get it all the time I get it quite a lot from other comics I've never had it from a top-level impressionist. I mean

that sounds like I'm slagging people off. But like I'm like as in you know, I'm sorry that Alistair the Galwan's never done your voice. But I'd sound quite an easy, I'm basically the Frank Spence of my generation in that everyone can do an impression of me. But I can imagine it'd be a good little sketch on an impression show, wouldn't it get you and then get like, you could have Jimmy? There's a lot of, John Richardson, there's a lot of good voices to do in that cat's countdown area. That is true, that's gonna be the next sketch.

I mean, Jimmy, you've just got a little the laugh. Yeah. John's laugh as well is pretty distinctive and I don't know about me and Rachel but you can never tell if you've got something distinct to yourself can you? I agree like I went to see the Garris Southgate the play at that play about Garris Southgate they did in the West End and there was a woman woombs who played Alex Scott you know Alex Scott the football pundit former footballer and this woman's impression of her was so good. Suddenly you notice the way Alex Scott spoke, if you know what I mean. So until you see someone do Susie Dent, you won't understand Susie Dent.

I think I've had years and years ago, and this was not an impression, but I think Stephen Fry and Hugh Lorry did a really good sketch of Countdown. Yes. How long have you been on Countdown now, Susie? 31 years. Blimey. I know. Not full-time. So the first few years I was one of many.

We just rotated various people in the corner and I was just working for the dictionary. So it was a bit of a sideways move. And then I think I went full-time in 2003 maybe. So you was working for the dictionary? Yeah, yeah, I never meant to get into tell you. How do you work for the dictionary? Okay, so there are lexicographers, right? Who are people who write the dictionaries?

Yeah? They're very quiet dictionary officers because essentially they're just staring at these databases of language which are fascinating. I'll take your word for that. Everything gets fed into these databases. They're billions and billions of words of, it could be a podcast recording, it could be you guys. It could be chat-ring conversations, text conversations, transcripts of, you know, chats on the street, scholarly journals, novels, you know, everything gets fed into these databases and then they study them to see which words are bubbling under, which words are

breaking through the surface and are really popular, which slang words are coming into use. So the dictionary's got a lot of slang in it even though a lot of a dictionary can a guest to hate that fact. But you know slang is the one category that no one can understand because it's designed to be you know incomprehensible to most to us. So that's why we need it in the dictionary. If we wanted to get a word in the dictionary how often would we need to use it in how many different places? Yeah, well that's the, you're halfway there actually because you, for a word to go in, it has to be used quite widely, so not just by one person on the same, in the same place. It has to be used without needing a definition. So, you know, if it's a word where you know what it means, but no one else does,

then you're constantly having to explain it, then that's probably not gonna get it in the dictionary. Right, yeah. But there's no hard and fast rule anymore. When I first joined LUP Oxford University Press, they had quite a hard rule that it would be five years of thi. And it had to show a to longevity and be used by lots of different people. But now, you know, a word, I remember when Chav came in in 2004, now it's hundreds of years old, but I remember Chavv was suddenly everywhere and there was

no way that they were going to wait to put that in because everybody wanted a definition of it. Likewise with Brexit, which was probably the most awaited definition ever, because Theresa May just kept saying, well, Brexit is Brexit. So that one had to come along quite quickly as well. So now the speed is pretty intense and they're online dictionary so things can go in almost immediately if they want them to. Right, okay. Blamey. And how did you end up on counter? We will come to you, we will

come to parenting, sorry, but I'm genuinely fascinated by like people who accidentally end up doing quite high profile jobs like that. Yeah, well, you know what, I think it's only really high profile thanks to 8-10 cats really, because before then, I was just quite happily flying below the radar because what I do is so specific. I mean it's not a very transferable skill and I was quite happy working at this point on the publishing side so I was kind of commissioning reference books and various things and and OUP also dictionaries had a deal with ITV and Channel 4 so that they provided the word referee so they provided someone from the dictionary department who could sit in the corner and say yes that's in or no that's not and I had been there I think a week

when my boss said look they really need new people they've got about four and they need a team of about six. Would you like to do it? And I said no and continued to say no for about four or five months until he said, well actually I think it would be very good for your job which basically meant you have to do this. So I went and I I don't even sure I had an audition actually. I think I was just plunged straight in with a lovely team. Was it Richard Whitely in those days? And he was great and I was sitting next to Rulalantka.

We can see it on YouTube unfortunately, I look completely terrified. Immediately going on there. I bet you look terrified. You're like someone who's sat in a silent dictionary office and then you're being put on television with Ruler Lenska and Richard Whiteley and Carol Valderman. They were also lovely, honestly. They were, they were genuinely nice. And then I just went, I only went there about two or three times a year and the rest of the time I was quite happily working away. And then Richland and Carol, thankfully, thought actually I think we need a proper, you know, solid team. And I was really, I know, this is not humble bragging,

I genuinely was incredibly lucky. And do you, last question on this and then we'll get on to kids. And do you enjoy count down or eight out of 10 cats just count down more? What's more stressful? Um, and is the fee different? Ha ha ha ha. You don't have to say less or more, but is it different? Yes, it's different.

That must have been nice that carried on. I bet you, because you did the one off and I bet you and Rachel would like this could be a bit of a winner here. I should ask, have you got children because otherwise we're going to have to really string out this countdown chat? Yeah. I have two girls who don't really care that much about any of the countdown stuff. Do they not? Not really I don't I don't talk about it that that this this this th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that that tho tho tho tho tho tho this could this could thi thi thi thi thi that th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th. thi thi thi thi that that to be that to to to to to to to to be to to to to to to to to to toa toa toa toa toa toa toa toa toa toa to be to be that thi thi about any of the countdown stuff. Do they not? Not really. I don't I don't talk about it that much. If ever by accident it's half-term or holidays or whatever and countdown turns up on the tele I just I have to ask them to switch it off. Yeah, I'm the same. Not with you but when it's me on the ttele. I don't have to switch countdown. Sorry, I was really mean.

I didn't mean you. I mean, I'm going to call it, Rob. I don't know if that's ever come up in your house, whether you do or don't switch off countdown. So how old are your daughters, Susie? So one is doing a g-sixie. Oh wow. And are they in the words, like, have you passed on your love of words? Like, because obviously you've got such a kind of unique job that, is that a family thing? No.

I kind of, I don't know if I'm sad or happy about that, but I did, I milked the full potential of it when they were little. So I would be, you know, we'd go out to the park or whatever and I'd tell them where Marigold comes from or Daisy comes from and I'm not sure we actually saw Marygoals, but I was going to get it in anyway. What kind of part you in? That's what a word spoon, that's what a word spoon, lighter, the sock. What a lovely day out girls. So I was told them well these came from and I think two or three words are really struck with

them because I had banged on about them for ages. One is a word that I squeeze in to any conversation I have if the weather is right and that's apricity which is the warmth of the sun on your back on a winter's day so they remember that. Oh that's nice apricity. Oh it's beautiful. Oh I like that. Yeah one of my favorites and it has only it was only recorded once in the 17th century and then no one used it again but it's very sad. What until you brought it back? Well it's not been recorded since then I think thi the old shit. th th th th th th th th th th th thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thu thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. Oh thi. Oh th. Oh th. Oh th. Oh th. Oh th. Oh th. Oh th. Oh th. Oh the the the the th. Oh th. Oh th. Oh th. Oh th. Oh th. Oh th. Oh th. Oh thi. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's thi. Oh, thi. Oh since then. I mean, I think it should be gone then, Susie, under your rules of adding stuff. Let's get rid of the old shit. Oh, no.

Well, no, you've got to move on a Volvo Dino and use that. Also, turn around, get it on your fucking face. It wants to someone they're back when they can face it. It works for that as well. Yeah, we'll work. We's works. there's works. there's works. there's works. there's, we's, we's, we, we, we, we, we, we, we'll, we'll, we'll, we'll, we'll, we'll, we'll, we'll, we'll, we'll, we'll, th. th. th. th. that. that. th. Yeah, th. that's, that. that. that. that. that's. that. that. that. th. th. Well, well, well, well. Well, well. Well, well. Well, well. Well, well. Well, well. Well, well. Well, well. Well, well. Well, well. Well, well. Well, well. Well, well. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Well, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. Yeah, th. th. th. that's, that's, th. th. that's, that's, it's, it's, it's, that's, it's, it's, that's, th. th. th. th. that. th. th. dictionaries now there's room for everything. Anyway so I would you know some of those I think went in but but inevitably you just get the eye roll now and I just think well surely they'll be polite enough to show a bit of interest but no no chance they don't give a shit not were you who just kids in general don't care do they yeah I'm hoping it will come back full circle but so do you do try comedy routines or jokes the the their their th? th? they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they're they're they're they're th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're Yeah I'm hoping it will come back full circle but said you do try comedy routines or jokes on your children? No, no I would I I I maybe I need to change this but I I don't want them to feel like they're children of a comedian in like do you know what I mean in that kind of in capital letters if you know I mean I

don't feel like I should that should be the big thing in our house that I'm I'm the funny guy because I'm not really in the house anyway. You know some people say I'm not on eight out of ten cats does countdown on certain episodes but um do you do that? Do you make me laugh on to be on eight out of ten cats? I remember you talk I don't know if I really like doing it because they always team up with John and make us being the sort of the two nerdy guys and that's just not who I am. And I was like, who's gonna break it to him? I don't, yeah, I don't sort of bring work home but if we're messing about, I do go full thro-and I'll the the the the the thor and I'll thor and I'll thor and I'll thorough and I'll thorough and I'll thorough.. thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty thirty, I don't sort of bring work home, but if we're messing about, I do go full-frottle, I'll dress up, be silly and try and make them laugh and stuff like that, but

I wouldn't sit them down and go, this Richard Pryoroutine, you know, like anything seriously, but no, but are they academic? Do they take after you or they're doing different stuff? You've got one still at school and then what's your older daughter? Is it uni or working? They're gone past uni so now working and I just it's so strange isn't it in terms of, I mean it's such a cliche the whole nature versus nurture thing but they couldn't be more different. So one is very listy, loves making lists incredibly organized and quite academic, and the absolute opposite. But you know, I love that. I'm the absolute antithesis of a pushy mum.

I think I should push more, but I don't push at all. Do you not? I like that. Because, you know, some people would go, I bet Susie Dent sat her children down with flash cards at the age of six months and she was going, you know, car, A pretty city, you know, son, etc. But that wasn't you. No, none of that. Some parents are like that though. It's like really into it, isn't they?

I know you've got to be a bit into the education of it all but some people it's like even at young age oh you've got to do this you got to do that and he's just like come off it's just a bit too much isn't it? Yeah I think it is I think but there is a middle ground isn't that you don't have to be the helicopter mum or whatever makes up his own and there's one about motherhood which totally sums me up so I might not be pushy but I am ridiculously protective in certain areas and the biggest one is the weather I just don't like them being cold so he says in this dictionary he defines sweater as

garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly. Yeah, it's so true. I have this not debate and now I'm just of the view. I just take the coat and they have to come to, they will want the coat. When they're cold yet. Nature will take its course. And yeah, all right, they leave them in a field see if they survive if you're doing that. No, but do you know what I mean? Like when I go, I went to the park with my kids on Saturday morning and my son was refusing to wear his coat and you're just like, well, just take it and he will, he didn't. But I thought, you know, he will come to it. I still do that age 24 though. Do you? And, you know, if anyone, they don't, thank God, but if anyone was to follow me around taking

photos when I'm with my kids, I would be the one holding the coat always. I would just take it just in case. Never say, say you're going to walk down to the local shops and to the the the the the the the they, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th, th, tha, than, thi, thi, than, than, than, than, than, than, tho, thanks, thanks, than, than, thanks, thanks, thanks, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, tho, than, than, than, than, than, than, thanks, than, thanks, thanks, thanks, than, and than, and than, and than, and thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks, thanks, to the local shops and go to the cafe Stone to eat and you put your coat on and you go, oh you're not wearing a coat and she goes no I don't want to wear a coat mom. Yes. What are you doing? I might surreptitiously stuff it in my bag. Amazing. It's just that's the kind of last vestige of my kind of protectiveness really is a coat thing. I don't know why it

bothers me so much but it really really does and I think it's because I get cold at the drop of the hat so you I don't know if you remember but in the countdown studio I always have a hot water bottle. No? Do you? Yeah Rachel and I have joint custody of this hot water because it's been proven that that studios any kind of working environment is set to a man's body temperature and not a woman. That's interesting. Yeah, that is true and in offices, but my argument is, but you can always put a jumper,

you can always put a jumper on, I can't go topless. So I think the other option is, we make it it hotter and then you don't have a hot water bottle but then then it will be topless and then that's worse. Well there's a happy medium there, it's like the tundra in that studio. Yeah, not when you're grafted, you've got the words written down, I'm thinking. The cogs are going, I'm sweating up the words pre-selected. But yeah, no, that is true though about that. But then I have this argument in the radio, and I did the radio, producer Jeweljoy says it's too cold, then I'm too hot.

But I'm like, well, I can't take any more clothes off. Yeah. Yeah. Do you know, Lettemn, they,that people are more likely to laugh cold than they are. If you're hot, you're falling asleep. If you're cold, you're sharp. Yes, I've heard that as well. Of the people on countdown, who would you be most perturbed out of Jimmy, John Richardson and Rob, about going topless in a hot studio?

Maybe Jim. Then we can, we can work out whether he did he have a hair transplant down there? Yes. I think Jimmy's body like you know does the work stop at the neck? Is the body older than the head? Do you know what I mean? I'd pay good money to see Jimmy Carr naked. Would you? Yeah just through intrigue. Not sexual. Just pure what Yeah, just through intrigue, not sexual, just pure what's happening in there? What's he got going on down there? Because he could either have a completely nothing-y body or a huge six-pack and a giant dick and I'd

accept both either. I couldn't tell you what's there. With John Richardson I can sort of-you-I can imagine John's body. I can if I close my eyes I can picture John's body. Okay, I've never imagined any of the bodies on Cardon I have to say so I'm try and do doing this now. I mean, they all think everyone looks amazing. I'm not saying they don't look amazing. So you're suggesting that we're I'm just saying I can't tell you what Jimmy colour looks like naked. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I'm. I. the the the the th. I. I'm. to. th. th. th. I'm. I'm th. th. I'm th. I'm to to th. I'm th. I'm to to th. I'm not. I'm just to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to th. I th. I th. I th. I the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the. I the. I the. I try. I try. I try try try try try try try to to to to to the. I can't the. I th we... I'm just saying I can't tell you what Jimmy Card looks like naked but John Richton I could draw it I think very accurately. I don't think Jimmy would have chest hair. No I think I think he'd be pruned within an inch of his life. He's like a shaved otter. Smooth, slick, lean, ready to go. At any point he can stand up and do 90 minutes to stand up without a flicker, I think. Yeah, exactly. Now, so your kids are getting older, the coat thing you're still doing.

What, how are you dealing with them going to nights out or partners or, you know, coming in late? Are you staying up? Are they both lived at home still as the older one moved out? Once moved out. So I just, I don't know, I knew throw in my kids a massive party animal. So they know after, that had to have a good time. But yeah, there's no way I could go to bed without knowing where both of them are. No, that's not true because the old ones moved out. But if one of them was at home, if both of them were were at home were at home and were they were th were they were th and they were th and they were th and th and th and th and th and th were at home and they'd gone out, there's nowhere could go to bed. Your kids aren't old enough of this yet. No. So I think that will come. You just can't. It's just inbuilt. So Susie, say your 16 year old's at home and she's gone to bed because she's got a GSE. She's 24-year-old staying with you the night. She's out meeting friends with you live in town? Where do you? Where do you at? Well, in the local town, so it's half an hour cab away or whatever, right? And she's get a cab back to yours.

She says, I'll be late. It's a big party. You might be going to a club. Yes. Your Susie Dent is Friday night. It's Friday night. It's 10 p.m. What happens now? presumably because the thrill of last leg would power you through to 11 p.m. I imagine. So you're on the sofa, you're not in the, you're not in bed. No, I think I would be in bed and I'd probably keep falling asleep and then I would wake up with a shock at 2 a.m. I really just go to see if her door was closed, if her bedroom door was closed. doors closed. I think I would do that. I mean how do you think have you got... I'm dreading it. I've got one of each and I'm terrified about the teenage years. Because obviously there's the push away. Do you know what I mean? Which I'm I don't think I'm built for. You're not built for rejection. Were you built for it, Susie?

No, it's, it's, there are really, really tough moments, but I think also, if your peers are going through it at the same time, you can just, you know, you can laugh about it when the angst is kind of, the immediate angst is passed. And also, yeah, I think I intellectualized it enough to know to know to know to know to know to know that it enough that it enough that it enough that it that it that it is that it is that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was the that it was that it was that it was that it was really that it was that it was really to know to know to know to to that it was to to to that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that it was that kind of the immediate angst is passed and also yeah I think I intellectualized it enough to know that it was a really important thing that was happening however difficult it was emotionally. So you kind of thought your way out of the sadness. Yeah I think I did but it is quite an amount of time and it's difficult as a woman as well not to get

caught up in the whole sort of hormonal angst because I feel like it's all really infectious so every mood is affected and yeah it is it is tough I mean it doesn't have to be really really tough I think for some it's worse than others but they do come back round that's my promise to you is you you kind of think this is always going to be like this but it genuinely isn't so you have that lovely kind of return and the circle is circled again and it's it's all okay but yeah it can be difficult but I think honestly I think the fear of it is worse than the reality I think. Oh that's good to hear that's good to hear you've got the whole online stuff though yeah I'm dreading the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the the the of thi thi. the. the the the the the the the the the the thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi th. th. th. th. th. the is the is the is the is the is the is the is the is the is the is the is the the the the the the to the. to to to to to to to to to theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. the. the. the. to hear. You've got the whole online stuff as well though. Yeah, I'm dreading the online stuff.

Did you have the online stuff? I didn't growing up, thank goodness, but I mean I see it unfolding all the time and it's just what I find really depressing is the whole transactional side of it. So that can you imagine in our childhoods if we had been online and then someone just blocked us for no reason, we would be devastated. Oh yeah. Oh God. But also young women especially, and men do it as well, but more women.

This isn't a joke for what Kate Middleton's, but I think it's mental that the future queen is doctorate and editing photos online to portray an image that doesn't exist. And I know everyone's joke about that the their their their their their their their their their their their their their. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's, their, their, their, th. It's, th. It's, to to to to th. It's, to to to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, to be, th. I, th. I, th. Oh, th. We, th. We, th. We, th. We, th. We, th. We, th. We, th. We, th. We, th. We, th. We, th. It, th. It, th. It, th. It is, th. It's, th. It's, th. It's, to, to, to, together, together, together, together, together, together, together, together, together, together, together, together, together, the Kate we do it all thing but I think it's mental that the future queen is doctorate image and admitting to it it's like it's getting to the stage where it's like everyone's showing a fake version of themselves on the internet. Yeah and that mental health wise that is just devastating and that's really tricky but I just I just I just I think I tha th a th a th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi thi th. thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. to to to to to to to to try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. think, well, maybe this is actually building a huge amount of resilience because I would have just, you know, not surfaced for about a week if someone had suddenly blocked me. But it just, like, okay, yeah, you're gone. And then I might think, oh, why did that happen?

And then literally they just move on because it's such a standard thing now. And I can't get my head around that at all. So that is not not great and I would also just say don't get your kids mobiles until they're in secondary school that would be my piece for advice as well. I think that's what we're looking at year seven like this game the summer of they're going to secondary school. Yeah yeah and did you have or have you had to do any like I'm not allowing you to go a mobile but can't do TikTok or you can't do Instagram or how does it work? Yeah, so I think I did do that but I think you then reach a point where you just, there's

absolutely no point because you can't hover over their phone. So it's just, there's a point where you just think, okay, you're now entitled to your privacy. And also, I think I'm really lucky because both my kids talk to me about everything, which is so different from my generation. And I mean, not to the point where I feel like it's not healthy for them to tell me everything, because of course they have to have their own lives. But I think I'm hoping I would know if something was really, really wrong.

Yeah. But you know, and I know that's not necessarily the case for everyone, and I don't think I had that growing up either. But, um, yeah, so I think they reached a point why I just thought, okay, I can't hover over a phone and it actually would be really wrong to do that, but that was a kind of instinctive thing that I felt, um, rather than, I didn't have a set rule about it, but I did, I definitely resist TikTok for quite a long time. You just stood next to him holding their coat when they was online. Just in case. Yeah, I might like some glooming shadow. So this podcast should do with Giles Brian Driffy, is that all about words? So this podcast should do with Jiles, is that all about words? that is that the one? Yeah somewhere else a purple. Um that so I I waffle on about words and

Giles just talks about every single person who's met who turned up to be worlds. I love Charles Brandreth with. I went on the wheel and Charles Brandy thus was on it and he was so funny it was unbelievable. Yeah he is really fun. I just so the way you said that, Josh, I feel like, I met Barry Cryer once, I sat in a pub with him, and he was probably in his 80s, I was in my 20s, and I was just in awe of all his stories. I just had visions of you when you're 80, just sat in a pub, talking to new comics about being on the wheel with Charles Brandriff and I was just... What it is, you know when when, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, and, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, th. th. thee, thee, thee, thi, is, is probably, thi, is probably, is probably, is probably, is probably, is, but you you don't expect Charles Brandreth to absolutely boss the wheel. Do you know what I mean? Yeah he just no he he has I've done radio broadcast with him and he honestly he's got the audience in that in the palm of his he is really funny he's in

the basketball he just doesn't stop. He I mean literally last year he said the only day he had off was Christmas Day and he hated it because he just he he he he he he he he he just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just just the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th th th th. th. thus. thus. thus. thus. thus. thus. thus. thus. thus. thus. the the th. the the the the the the the the basketball he just doesn't stop. I mean, literally last year he said the only day he had off was Christmas Day and he hated it because he just loves working. He's got problems. He was working. I think he needs to jumpers. I think he needs to jump. I think he needs to jump. I think he needs to step back.

That's too much. That is true. Just his jumpers from? I don't think you need the jumpers. I think the jump, when someone wears a wacky jumper, you think, oh, maybe that's making up for something. But he could wear a normal jumper and still be as funny. He's so good and so charismatic. He doesn't even need the jumpers. He's got a jumper. This is what I mean. Oh, here he is. He's always on the end. He's the he invented the best. He's the best. He's the best. He's the best. He's the best. He's the best. He's the best. He's the best. He's the best. He's the best. He's the best. He's the the the the the the the the the the he's he's he's he's the the he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's he. He's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's the. He's the. He's the. He's th me. What, the Gap hoodie? No, the one, he gave a jumper to Princess Diana, she wore it, and it was so popular that it's the best-selling jumper design ever. Yes. How do you know this? Because he told me on the wheel. And you won the gold award for Best Entertainment Podcast for Something

Rhyme's Purple. Yeah, purple. Yeah that was in the first year. It's a funny business podcasting isn't it? I think the best definition of it I heard is that it's like being in a recording studio before the red light goes on. Yeah yeah that's a good way of looking at it. You kind of talking but yeah it's just it's very different as you know because this is hugely successful. Are you not in the top five all the time? Well. I I I I I I I I I th. Yeah. I th. Yeah. Yeah. I th. Yeah. th. th. th. th. Yeah. th. th. th. Yeah. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thu. th. thu. thu. the thu. the the thu. the the the the. I mean not in the top five all the time. Well, I don't check anymore. We don't really look anymore. We've become too cool for that. And by that I mean no we're not.

Tell you what we haven't got. Branded mugs, tote bags and t-shirts like you guys have. I don't know if we sell anytoday. But I have got in front of me, I have actually got merch. Well, yeah, we were told that merch was quite a good thing, but it's just, I've got a mug here which has got the word bloviater on it and it says noun, someone who talks at great length on a subject they know very little about. Is that a real word, a blovator? Yeah. You've got a t-sha-funger, the smell fungus, tree, tree, tha, t, t, t, t, tha, t, t, tha, t, tha, tha, thae. And, tha, tha, tha, th. And, th-a, th-a, th-a, th-a, th-a, thr-a, th-a, th. th. A, th. A, th. A, th. A, th. A, th. A, th. A, th. A, th. A, th. A, th. A, th. A, th. A, th. A, th. A, th. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A. A, tttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt-a. M-a. M-a. M-a. M-auu. M-au. M-au. M-au. M-a. M-a. M-a. M-a. M. t-a. t-a. t-shirt with smell fungus written on it. I love smell fungus. So smell fungus is somebody who finds fault in every single thing and person that they meet. A smell fungus? So someone be described, they're a right smell fungus? Yes. It's good. That is nice. Is it mood hoover? Is that in a dictionary? Is that in a dictionary?

I think that could be our word that we try and get going Josh and then could get it in a dictionary. Yeah. Okay let me have look. Oh come on, you should be off the top of your nut. Come on Suzy, should bread and butter? Hang on. It's not in the, it's not in the mood hoover. Mood Hoover? I think we should we could get that going. Someone that just takes all of the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy the energy that just takes all of the energy and joy out of the room We've interviewed a few mood hovers and we're off I'll tell you what we have been hoovered my mood's been sucked straight up. Oh yeah But I delighted to say Susie your Hoover is on blow rather than suck in terms of energy in the room Josh no I'm not Jimmy car get you get your head out of the gutter do you do you find? do do do you do you do you do you do you do you do you do you do you do you th you th you th you th you th you th you th you th you th you th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi tho tho energy in the room. Josh, come on. No, I'm not Jimmy Carr. Get your head out of the gutter.

Do you find Jimmy Carr's jokes for a bit much in those intro, Susie? Well, what I still love about it is that the audience are never quite sure whether I'm going to be really hurt by them. I know. I always feel a bit awkward. I really don't mind. And if if they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they don't th. I thi. I they they they they they they th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try try thi thi t're really bad, then the producer will show them to me before. She says, Jimmy just wanted to check that you'd be happy. Ah, that's nice.

They don't do that with our jokes and they're really brutal. Yeah, I was always having a go at us and what we look like. Jimmy's two lines and they often kind of coalesce in one, in one intro. that I'm a sex addict or that I'm so th. sex addict or that I am so boring I'm a form of euthanasia. Right. But those are the two lines. If I ever ever have a new book out, I will inevitably get a whole load of people saying, show it to Jimmy.

So maybe that shut him up. But yeah, I genuinely don't mind his intros. Did they evolve over time? Because it wasn't like the first one, you were like, whoa! What's the hell's going on here? There's Susie the F. Oh, guys, we're just mashing up for charity, yeah? I really didn't know how to be for the first few shows,

because I just, I think I was trying too hard to be a comedian because I thought that's what was expected and I'm not. And so it fell really flat and I just thought, I don't know what to do. And so in some ways it felt quite comfortable being Jimmy's stooge. And he was quite respectful at first as well, which also think a bit odd because he could so rude to all of you and then come over to me and Rachel and he'd say a few nice things but yeah but I just what I would really love in both a few is just a few combat lines if possible. Well for Jimmy? Yeah well you can go you can go on his tax kind you obviously. Yes yeah I'll tell you all you could say I'd love to have a joke about your appearance Jimmy but I can't write one because your appearance keeps changing. Oh here we go here we go that's nice yeah

okay have you ever discussed parenting with Jimmy or Rachel or John or John not specifically I mean I do sometimes I choose my word origins on countdown and sometimes I'll come up with a word that I love that is to do with parenting and and Rach seems to appreciate those but I mean we talk about our kids all the time but I don't think we give parenting advice. I mean what my sister really I don't know I think I'd love to think I was full of wisdom but I'm not sure I am. I was going to say what do you do your kids now then because like they're their their their their their their their their they're they're they're their they're they're they're they're their they're their they're their their their their to to their to to to to to to to to their. their. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their. I'm their. I'm to their. I'm to to their. I their. I their. I their. I their their. I their their their. I their their their their their their their the. I the. I the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm the. I'm to. I'm the. I'm the. I to the. I going to say, what do you do with your kids now then? Because they're older, do you have stuff, because when they're young, you sort of do whatever they want, but then they get into their own taste and stuff like that.

Are there things you bond over or are you going to these concerts of bands you don't really like, but you just want to spend so it was quite difficult at the when they were really young to find things that they both like to do is you know it's either too young or too old but now it doesn't make any different and actually the three of us have great times you just got to eat so we had a really lovely meal out the other day because it was mother's day and yeah so it's actually got a lot easier and we just we laugh a lot which is really lovely as well so I feel a lot better and better you know when you're when the kids are like four five six seven you just think this is just getting this this I can't believe it's just getting better every

year and then you're dreading like Josh you're just dreading that 13 year year old threat but it actually yeah as I say it comes it comes back around and th you're th and th and th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th I I I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th I th th th I th th I th the the thi I thi the the the the th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi th. I thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi the thi the to the the the the the the the the the thi the the the year old threat. But actually, yeah, as I say, it comes back round. And actually, I think the best years are now for me. Because they're just, everyone just kind of gets on, makes each other laugh. And you know, and the kids message each other all the time without me. So I'm not kind of conduit between them, which I think is really nice as well. So yeah. That's good. Well the best years are always now because there only is now really because what's gone is gone and there's no point worrying about the future because it's not happening so I think if you just drill down into what's going on right now because you can spend the whole time going on God but what about this? What about that but that's not happening now is no thi. It's more that's that's that's thing now that's not happening now thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi tho- tho-I tho-I tho-n't the tho-n't tho-n't tho tho tho tho their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their thooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. the. the. thooooooo their their their the best even if they are being a pain in the ass to go well this is all we've got here so we'll crack on with it. That's the true and there's a lovely word so I'm going to ball you as one of the words

now. I like it. I like it. You don't book Susie Dan and what not want some nice words. Well, not actually a particularly nice word in itself but it's just got a lovely thing and it's tho. thly thly thly thly thly th. th. the th. th. the th. the the th. th. the the th. It's the the th. It's th. It's the the th. It's the the the the the th. It's th. It's thi thi thi. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's the the the the th. It's the the th. It's the th. It's th. I's thrown tr true. I's true. I's true. I's true. I's true. I's true. I's thrown thrown there's there's thrown th. I, right? And it's anti-pelagy, which just sounds really odd. But it's like, it's all to do with storks, the bird, and nothing to do with storks bringing babies along. But storks in classical times were thought to be really kind and sweet and to look after their parents in old age. So they were thought, for example, if they flew anywhere and they had had had had had had to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. I, their. I, their. Ie, their. Ie. Ie. Ie. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. toe. toe. toeck. toeck. toeckeckeckeckeckeckeckeckeckeckeckeckeckeckeckeckeckeckeckeckeckeckeckereeckeckeckeckeckeckereeckeckeckthought to for example if they flew anywhere and they had to travel some distance with their parents they would carry their parents on their wings and so the word means like returned favors it's

like you you have as the parent done everything you can for your children and then suddenly that gets reversed and it's like a a requital of oh that's nice. It's just peaceful. It's like requited love of the really best kind. So I do think, although we're not storks, obviously, I do think that we get there. And. And do you think, do you, these words, because these just come, you've obviously, you know,

this is not just your job, but it's your passion, right? so are you, are you are you are you are you are you are you you you th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, are you're you're you're you're you, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th.. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi, thi. just your job but it's your passion right? Yeah. So are you doing, are you doing this when you're going for your Mother's Day meal with your daughters? Are you going, actually there is a lovely word? Shut up, ma'am, what do you want? Yeah. I wouldn't do that. I might sneak it into a card or, but no, I wouldn't get that. I just kind of enjoined them for myself. I just kind of enjoy them for th th th get the best reception but I just hope I try and slip words into general into my general conversation and if they ask me about them great and if not I just hope that there's at some level they're absorbing them a little bit. Do they follow you on TikTok? I hope not. I hope not. Do you follow them? No I really don't. No. W what I really don't want th th th th th. th th th. th th th. they they they they they they they they they they they they th. they they th. Do. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do th. Do they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do. Do th. Do th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th I th I th I th I th I to to to to to to to try try just don't want anyone to make connections with them either. Are you going to follow your children on Instagram except or whatever it is in those days Rob? Yeah. I'm going to start clabbing with them. Now, I will follow them though. Again, we're the same. Obviously we talk about our kids a lot and stuff,

but we don't give their names out and we don't put their faces out and stuff. So they have a little bit of, they can go their own way. But I'll definitely be, you know, they they they can't, they can't, they can't, they can't, they can't, they can't, they can't, they can't, they can't, they do with friends and family anyway which is quite handy so that they can look at photos and stuff Lou puts it all up for if I put a photo out of my children with me I'll tend to like Photoshop it so the arm looks weird or something like that but I think all amateur photographers enjoy doing that so all all amateur I'm always editing my children's knees and hands that's how I spend my mother's to to to to the the the the the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th I th I'm th I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. Oh th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thee. I'm the. the. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm thi. I'm editing my children's knees and hands. That's how I spend my Mother's Day evening.

I don't know about you. When I'm recovering from surgery and I'm too, you know, and I can't go out in public because I'm still recovering. I will spend hours on my laptop on Photoshop just tweaking the sleeves of my kids' tops. Anyway, the news cycle will have moved on by Friday. I don't think it will. What do you think Brandreth's like as a dad?

Because we've got him coming on soon. So what would you ask him about parenting? That's a really good question. Well, I'd ask him about his children's names because he does talk about his kids and their names on the podcast and they are incredible. So you can ask him about the inspiration for the name. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. And th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, what thi, what thi, what thi, what thi, what do thi, what do thi, what do thi, what do thi, what do thi, what thi, what thi, what thi, what thi, what thi, what thi, what thi, what thi, what thi, what thi, what thi, what thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi. What thi. What thi. What thi. What thi. What thi. What do thi. What do thi. What do thi. What do thi. What thi. What thi. What thi. What thi. and their names on the podcast and they are incredible. So you can ask him about the inspiration for their name. Oh yeah, looking forward to that. Do you think they're embarrassed by the jumpers? No, I don't think so.

I just, I get the feeling that they are all incredibly in sync, and he's just had a birthday and he's got his grandkids around. So when I did th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi thi their thi thi thi thi their thi. So, their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their, their, their, I their, I th. So, I th. So, I th. So, I th. So, I thi, I's, thi, thi. So, thi. So, thr-i. So, thr-iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii. Sooooooo'n'n'n't picture of this amazing cake, this grandkids had made, he's got his grandkids around. So when I did goggle box with him, I was a last minute swap for Maureen Letman or Joanne Lumley or somebody, he's just got his grandkids coming in and out and he's just, that's the different side of Charles, you know, he's got a bust of Shakespeare and pictures of Judy Dench everywhere and all the people that he knows. And then just a messy kitchen, well not that messy, but just, you know, it's just home. It's a beautiful house but it's very, very homely and he genuinely is a very warm person. So I think he'd be a very loving granddad actually and dad.

What about you though? Because your girls are getting older now, grandparent? Or you're not bothered orparent, or you're not bothered, or what's your views on that? I think, actually, I don't know, I've got mixed views. I sort of feel like I'm looking forward to freedom, but also kind of slightly dredging it. So it's that kind of the mixed emotion. Yeah, I think I would completely love a grandchild when it comes, but I'm not, I'm definitely not in a hurry. No. Yeah, because you're a babysitter in that situation, aren't you? Suddenly, your freedom's gone slightly before you know it, you're spending your evening babysitting. And I think it's just one more person to worry about when it comes to coats and all the other wor. Of course, one more coat to carry around.

That's the spirit, Susie. Why just another coat to carry around for 25 years. I just spread my stress against across everything. So that's, I think you've done well to just move it into coats. Do you know what I mean? I think that really helps. That's good because it means that during summer you're worry free exactly. Totally liberating and any holiday although then it's the sun cream actually maybe it's not just one thing suncream comes out then and that's the other thing but oh my word yeah it

never ends what will end by asking you this is there one because you've got grown up children is there stuff you still get annoyed with that your daughter does, that your 24-year-old daughter, that if you told her this, if you would say it on the podcast, then she'd maybe change her behavior? Is it the coat thing,

or is there anything else that she does that you think? They would just make my life easier if you just live like? It would just make my life easier if you just live like this. Um, the only thing I can think of is being a passenger in the car and your foot going through the floor for the break. So even though it feels like she's sitting on the car in front, she's probably not, but I just, I can't, I can't take it. So my hands on the dashboard, well not the dashboard, but you know in front of me, my foot is on the invisible break and I just close my eyes. It's a bit like me in a roller coaster actually. I just, I close my eyes and want it to end. So that's

that's more me than how. Is that and is that because of her driving or because of who she is? She's just always just kind of in a hurry, but no she think she has actually incredibly safe driver. This is just more me Catastrophizing and I actually can't wait Josh for you to sit in the car. If you're worried about social media and stuff you've got driving lessons to come and all of that. Oh no no no no Oh life. It's just problems after problems after problems after problems No, but there's joy there's joy the joy the joy the joy th th th th th th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th th th th th th th th th th thi thi thi thi thi. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. that's the. that's thea's that's thea's thea's thea's thea's thea. thea. the joy, there's joy, there's joy to come. So that's the only thing I would just just wanted to do is drive less quickly. But you know, that's just the same with every single parent.

But other than that, no, do you know what, I really have reached the point where the Nivia has come down across the lens of my eye and everything seems just sort of lovely......... 0. 0. 0. to to to to to have to have to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be to be the to be the to be the the their, I, I, their, their, their, their, thii. thiou. thi, their, their, their, their their their their their their their their their their, their their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, th. So, to come, to come, to come, to come, to be to me me me, thi. So, thi. So, thi. thi. thi. thi. thiiiiiiia. the. thea. thea' theananananananananjou. So, thiii. So, their their, thiivea has come down across the lens of my eye and everything seems just sort of lovely again. So I would say just honestly get through the teenage years they may not be as bad as you think and oh God there's just sunshine on the other side there's loads of very Christie guys. Lovely very positive. This is that's a beautiful ending. That's what you needed Josh. Yeah I am going to go into the day with a spring in my the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to. the to. to. to. to. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. to. I. Yeah. I. I'm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. th. t. Yeah. t. Yeah. t. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I. Yeah. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I'm. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. I'm th. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I th. Yeah. Yeah. I to go into the day with a spring of my step. Like Giles Brandreth arriving at the wheel. Cheers Susie. Thank you. Thank you.

Suzy Dent! Lovely Susie Dent. Her podcast, something rhymes with Purple. that is available now. It's one small, etc., etc. There's one small fungus t-shirt available in the merch store for them in a size small. I know you clicked on the I clicked on the merch store. They're just down to the small they've sold out everything except one small t-sol-

So if you're a little fella that like smell fungus on your top. That's where you go. That's where you go. That's where you go. That's where you go. That's where you go. That's where you go. That's where you go. That's where you go. And it go. And it's that. And it's that's that's that's that's where you're that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's where you're that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's where you're the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the th. I. I the th. I the. I th. I th. I's th. I's you go. And it's been reduced from 20 to 16 pounds. Right, Josh, I'll see you next week. See you there. Bye. Hello, I'm Tim Reed. You probably don't know me as the creator and writer of sitcoms, like Peter Kay's Carsh and Meet the Richardson's, because I write shows with other people's names in the title. Not anymore. Welcome to my new podcast, Fist of Firsts with Tim Reed. In Fist of Firsts, I'll be chatting to the biggest names in comedy about the pivotal first steps in their careers and their creative process.

Fist of Firsts with me, Tim Reed. Find it wherever you get your pods. Oh dear, you died. Crushed by a chandelier, how fabulous! But don't worry about that, because you're coming to the fun place, where the lava's hot and the gossip is even hotter. Welcome to Hell is the brand new comedy podcast by me, Daniel Fox, comedian, internet sketch hussy and hell's resident receptionist. And me, Dane Buckley, comedian, black belt and contemporary dance, and lapsed angel. Each week we read outrageous confessions from you, the listener, and judge them. We also welcome fabulous guests like Tom Allen and Rosie Jones to the Pit to share

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