Parenting Hell with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe - S9 EP5: A Strict 'No Fingers in Tea' Policy

Episode Date: September 10, 2024

More misadventures in parenting, life, and beyond with Rob Beckett and Josh Widdicombe... Please follow and leave a rating and review you filthy street dogs... xx If you want to get in touch with the show with any correspondence, kids intro audio clips, small business shout outs, and more.... here's how: EMAIL: [e-mail] INSTAGRAM: @parentinghell Parenting Hell is a Spotify Podcast, available free everywhere every Tuesday and Friday. MAILING LIST: parentinghellpodcast.mailchimpsites.com Join the mailing list to be first to hear about live show dates and tickets, Parenting Hell merch and any other exciting news... A 'Keep It Light Media' Production  Sales, advertising, and general enquiries: [e-mail] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hello, I'm Rob Beckett. And I'm Josh Widdickham. Welcome to Parenting Hell, the show in which Josh and I discuss what it's really like to be a parent, which I would say can be a little tricky. So, to make ourselves and hopefully you feel better about the trials and tribulations of modern-day parenting, each week we'll be chatting to a famous parent about how they're coping. Or hopefully how they're not coping. And we'll also be hearing from you the listener with your tips, advice, and of course,

tales of parenting woe. Because let's be honest, there are plenty of times when none of us know what we're doing. I'm going back to university for zero dollar delivery fee up to 5% off orders and 5% Uber cash back on rides, not whatever you think University is for. Get Uber won for students. With deals this good, everyone wants to be a student. Join for just $4.99 a month. Hello, you're listening to parents in hell with Bodee. Bodee.

Can you say Rob? Becket. Bodee. Can you say Rob? Rock? Beckett? Bacchett. And Josh? Whiddikov? Clever boy. Clever boy. Clever boy.

Clever boy. He just turned two. He sounded in the distance, didn't he? I've listened to the podcast since he was born. Thank you for all the laughs and car rides. Haley from Nutsford, Cheshire, Nutsford Services, I know that. Yeah, Cheshire Oaks, designer outlet. Nutsford Services, yeah. Why do I know that? It's in the royal family they talk about it. You probably stop there as well a lot, touring. I've probably stopped there as well. It's a classic services. It's th. It's th. It's th. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic. It's a classic services. It's nice isn't it Nutsford it's where like footballers live. Yes but there's something else where it's nice by

I can't remember it's called. Ordly Edge. That's why they all live isn't it? Yeah. Would you like to live in Ordly Edge with all the footballers? Wimslow? Around there? Um, not really. I don't want to go to school pick up and see Robbie Savage. If you had to a to to to do you think you'd get on best with like that at the England team? That's such a good question. Lee Carsley? Well, I'm not a kiss up to the manager, I don't think. I think I've got a bit more edge than that. Yeah, absolutely.

You've got edge now. John Stones? John Stones, good guy? What about you, Rob? Adam Ramsdale. He's a laugh, he's friends with Alex Brooker. Aaron Ramsdow. Oh, he's only just left arson. I already forgot his first name. Ramsdow and Ramsdow and Declan Rice probably. I've met Declan Rice and he was normal. He was very normal. You would live in orderly edge in a flat share with Declan Rice and Rumsdale and maybe John Stones. Why not? Why not? Good guys. That's my reality show about it. Rose watches, and I'm sure Lou has watched this because she has a similar taste in TV. The Real House Wives of Cheshire. Right. Loo is completely obsessed with these shows. More American though than UK. So she watches the van der pump rules. this one. Rose watches the the th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th, why th, why th, why th, why th, why the the the the the the the the the th, why the th. the the the. the. the reality the reality the reality the reality the reality thoomity the reality the reality the reality the reality the reality the reality the reality the reality the reality the the reality the reality the reality the reality the reality the reality the the the reality the the the the reality the the the the show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. tho. tho. tho. tho. thoooooooooooo' show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show show. the the the show show UK. So she watches the Vanderpump Rules, do you know this one? Yeah, Rose watches the Vanderpom rules. Okay, Summer House? I don't know if Rose watches Summer House. This is like where they have a big Summer House in New York

that all these people go to at weekends and get off of each other. When I said I was doing a TV show, Rob, I've got to admit it, it's Summer House House. Southern Charm you you you you th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the. the. the. thr. thr. thr. to. throoooo. theea. throo. thr. throoo. thr. there's a lot of real housewives going on. And Vander Pump Rules is a spin-off of real housewives I think, is that right? Yes, I think so, but it's all owned by this guy called like Andy Cohen or something. Right. So the Andy Cohen Empire, basically Bravo, I don't know, Luja just says all these words, I don't understand what they mean. And basically Rob, what happens is if I go out th. Loe, Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob, Rob, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I th, I'm th, I'm thus, I'm thus, is th, is thus, is thu, is thu, is thu, is thu, is is th, is is th, is th, is th, is a th, is a the the the the the the the the the the th, is a the the the th, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is, is th, is, is th, is th th thi, is thi, is thin, is thin, is thus, is thus, is thus, is thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. thu. they mean. And basically Rob, what happens is if I go out, say I'm doing a gig, yes, yeah, I'll get back at 10 p.m. Yeah. And Rose will be sat on TV and there'll be some women who've had an incredible amount of cosmetic surgery done. Yep. There's normally always one I fancy as well. Yeah. I don't mind watching it for a bit when they're on.

And then they're arguing in a, like an Italian restaurant, that's very high end. Yep. And one of them's probably got a drinking problem and they're arguing about that or something. They've had a bit of work done as well. And one of their husbands has been cheating. But there their they's is they's is they's is they's is they's they's they's they's they's they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll they'll thi. thi. thi. they'll they'll they're thi. they're thi. thi. their. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. their. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. their. their. their. their their their their thi. thi. thi. thi. they're the. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're arguing. they're they're arguing. they're thea. the series. I don't know how roses across it. What they do is though, they'll put people in Summer House that are in Southern Charm so that when you like that character, you'll go back and watch their origin story.

It's like Marvel for sort of 35-year-old women. I'm not saying you have to be a 35-year-old woman to like this, but I'd say whereas you expect sort of a spotty virgin to love Marvel and know all the ins and outs, I'd say a 35-year-old woman with two children is pig watcher of these shows. Because there's like all sorts, I think Lou's watched them all. There's going to be like some sort of fan event that they want to go to. There's real housewise of Dubai, they're inventing towns now that they're from, that's got that popular. And often like there'll be footballers and Rose will go, oh he's married to one of the people. Well I think real housewives of Atlanta might have, I think Deontay Wilder's boxer's wife's on it once. There's one which Rose was watching and Kelsey Grammar's wife was on it.

They should do real housewives of Bromley. Lou could star in this, should dominate. Just having a big row in the Glades. But I watched boxing sometimes and there's Deonte Wilder who's at one point in the heavyweight champion of the world and she goes, oh that's like Clarissa's husband. I'm like, all right, okay. That's what it's come down to that. The show's become more popular than this guy fighting for a living. But yeah, no, Luz, Loo's watched them all.

Yeah. She's obsessed. I don't know what got us into that. In their defense, they have to spend a lot of hours on their own in the evening, Because Rose has been at home, like, how has she coping at home for like two weeks? That's not saying her defense. Rose fucking loves it when she gets to watch the TV, purely her choice. Let's not pretend she's going, oh, I wish Josh was here so we could debate what sports documentary that I'm going to sit and look at my phone during. She's going, fucking get in.

He's at a gig. I'm doing three episodes of Vanderpumps. Well, I'm going to say something now that I think's going to come back to haunt me and blop in my face. But if I've been away working for like three days or whatever, I come home and look, I'll go, I spend an artware with the kids. I'm exhausted. They've driving mad. And then I go, okay, yeah, well, let's have a glass of wine watch a bit of telly. She puts on her thing. And I'll be like, oh, what's this? I thought you was watching Summer House, Series 8, and there's 10 series of that. And now we're watching Series 2 of Southern Charm.

And she'll be like, oh, but I finished that, now I'm watching it on one and a doing the math. Ten episodes of series. Is she watching it on one and a half time? I don't know what she's doing, but she's plowing through it, like an alky in a minibar. She absolutely loves it. She's less expensive. Yeah, but you know, fair enough. But what is, and that's why Lou's time, she goes, Lou goes to bed quite late, I think, really. Yeah.

Because if I'm at home a lot, I'll normally go bed before Lou, but she loves it, but it's fair enough, I watch, but then I watch hours now as a football and I'll go, oh, I'm that good, but I'll somebody. Exactly. We've all got our vices. I don't come in and say to Rose, Rose, by the way, the way, the way, the way, the way, the way, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, to, I, I, I, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I.................... I, I, I, I, I, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm, to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. to. I'm, I'm, I, I, I, I'm, she says, quite a long list of stuff she needs to pick me up on. So maybe I'm wrong on this. Yes, I've got that from Lou about this. I'm not sniffy about this. Like I don't come in and go, oh, what's this rubbish?

No, no, no. Some of it's quite interesting as well, but the problem is she not only do I miss a couple of episodes or whatever, or even a couple of series, not only do I not understand the plot anymore, the amount of plastic surgery these cast members have have, it looks like they've been replaced. Do you know like when they've changed Martin Fowler on East Enders? Yeah, and one day it's James Alexander, the nextthat she's gonna give me load of shit because now let's reverse tag without these ladies in our life Josh it would fall apart how is Rose coping with the kids for two weeks while you're in Paris because as hard

as it is for you it's harder for her. She's done a fucking sterling job Rob she's done a fucking brilliant job yeah yeah so to thu. the their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their she's their she's to their she's to to to their she's to their she's their she's their she's their she's their she's their she's their she's their she's their she's their she's their she's their she's their she's their she's their she's their she's their she's their she's their she's their she's to to to to to toy. toy. toy. She's toy. She's toy. She's toy. She's toy. She's to toy. She's to to toy. Let's do that. Let's crawl back. Yeah. Yeah. Can I just say? Luce so selfless. She can just lift so much weight in the gym. Can I just add that, Rob? And I'm really impressed. Oh, she's strong. that's try to really win her over here. I'm just trying to win her. It's a strange compliment that isn't it. No, she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she's she's she's she's s s she's s she's s she's s she's s she's s she's s she's s she's s she's s she's s she's s she's s she's s she's s. No. No. She's s she's s she's she's she's she's she's she's she's she's she's she's she's she's she's she she's she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she she's she's s. She's s. She's s. She's s. She's s. She's s. She's s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s s. that's s, for her, that's a good compliment that she like, as opposed to being a great mother and look at off. I've already done that one. I've said she's done a great job. Oh, so I thought that was your go-to compliment. No, it was just a bonus compliment.

Oh, sorry. I was going to say, then I changed it the strength thing and now I wish I just stuck with the first one. No, it's great, no, I just thought that was your first port of call. And she's got a great mind. She's got a great mind. It's got a great mind. It's got a great mind. It's got a to say, theymea, well, well, well, well, well, well, to, th, and we won't want to lose that in government. Yeah. Can I say something? Keep going, I like it. That might be controversial. Yeah. I think

when you're in a relationship and you're in love with someone. Yeah. I don't think you identify the things that you're in love with in the same way, like you just are. Do you know what I mean? So it's not like you go, the reasons I love this person are they are dependable, they are funny, they are strong, yeah they are great mind. The times when you're noticing someone's personality traits, that's towards the end of a relationship when it's about to break up. Right, so what you're saying, that you're taking Rose for granted? No I'm not saying thain. thiiiiiiiiiii. that you're saying. to to to say to say to say to say to say to say to say that to say that that that that that that that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that that that that that that that that that that that that the the the the the the their the same. th. th. th. the they. th. the the thro. the the thro. they. thro. throoo. the. that that that's that that's that's that that that, Ralph. Fucker, you're a fucking, fucking weasel, that's where you are. There's a little trait I've noticed. I was just trying to understand what you was getting across. So you're so used to her being wonderful, you don't notice it.

No, what I'm saying is, I think it's weird when people say the reasons they love their partner, because the reason you love..... thapapapapapapapap. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. thi. I thi. I thi. I thathe thathe thathe thathe thatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheathe thatheatheatheatheatheat, I'm the reason, I'm their, I'm their, I'm their, I'm their, I've their, I've their, I've that, I've that, I've th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's th. I's that, I's thatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheatheat, I'm that. that. that. that that that that thateateateat thateateateat, I've thateateat, I've it hits you on a guttural heart level rather than they head level. There's no thought behind it. It's just pure energy and love for Rose that's driving you. It's a human connection that you shouldn't be labeling with facets of their character. You have been in the city of love too long baby. You're like an absolute sex man, man. I think Rose's listening to this and all her clothes have just fallen off after that. You sweet talking sod. I'm sorry, listeners, if I'm too deep for you.

And Lou, I wanted to say to you, I think you've got a great arson. Ha ha! Ha! Episode Title, right there on a gutter all level I'm not even thinking about it my guts just know yeah oh Robert I've had to put gut all level problems over here I've had the shit's for about a week Rob talking in the guttural level. Do you know what, they don't mess about with butter in France, do they?

Is that where you think it is maybe? I think you would. Because you eat quite clean, really? What are you eating? I've been eating quite well, yeah. to be the phone. Oh, look me find it. Yeah. To explain why that's happening is because Josh has taken a laptop with a battery

that doesn't work properly that even plugged into the wall and switched on, will not charge it up enough to record a podcast and he's also lost his headphones. So he's still using the producer's headphones for the last leg and the last leg. While he does his podcast. That's the situation we're at. So he had to ask Michael if he can show the pictures on his phone. to show the pictures on his phone. I imagine he's getting his data roaming paid for by the last leg.

No, not I don't have data. through his phone. What picture you got, Josh? Have you sent it? That's my dinner two nights ago. French catering is fascinating, Rob. Okay, that's interesting. It looks like, chart. I'm going to try and attempt to tell you what you've got. Yeah. I see new potatoes in the middle. New potatoes. Yeah. I would say on the side, are they two hash browns? Two hash browns, yeah. Yeah, okay. Now it looks like potato salad? Potato d'oeufin noirs. Sorry, potter d'oeuvres obviously, okay. Right, we've got a lot of potato in this dish. Yeah. So and then some balls that look like they could be like, they're circular. It's not like crockets, but maybe arsona. No, they're potato crockets, but spherical, not in a sort of rectangular, sort of shape, cylinder.

And then in front of that, it looks like porridge. That's risotto. Fucking that one, that was a veggie dinner one night. Your asses are a fucking Hovis bakery. It's a tato done 16 ways. And then what's that little pot next to some chocolate? That is a apple crumble. Because it's the height of summer in France.

Why is it brown? That's the crumble, which is pure brown cheese. I'm not brown cheese, brown cheese. that's pure brown cheese. It's pure brown cheese. Wow, that, yeah, I can see why your stomach's in pieces. Yeah. Because all that had been cooked with so much butter.

Even the new potato looks too buttery. The risotto looks up porridge. We'll put that on our Instagram. Yeah. And then what are they not giving you protein? the protein? Great yogurt at breakfast and then I'll have a protein shake after I go to the gym. Did you eat all that food?

No. Do you want to see all that food? Do you want to see the chicken? Do you want to see Phil Kerr's dinner? Oh, the legend that is Phil Kerr, who helps write on, well, writes with me on Slevesgo Dating. And he's writing with Alex Brooker, this is his dinner. No fuck off. Is that chicken? Is that chicken? In balls? Eight balls. they've got eight croquettes. Yeah. Are they're they chicken balls? Are they potato balls? I don't know which ones they are. I can't remember because there are so many different.

I think they might be potato. Right. He looks like he's loving them. That's his dinner is here. Do you know what that looks like? That chicken? It looks like a fox has been at a bird's nest, right? And it's had to go at all the chicks, and you've picked them up and put them in a takeaway box to the RSPTA. Can you resuscitate these? Do you want to see? I love this game, yes.

What I love most about this. You know I'm going to get this on the Instagram. The tea is not ideal over here. I've had to bring my own tea bags. Oh my God, absolutely Brexit. Yeah, and get this. You know I went home halfway through? Yeah, mentally or physically. Oh. The mugs aren't big enough for my tea, so I've brought a pack my own mug. Who the fuck? What pathetic kind of middle-aged bloke in Lanzarote who won't eat Alan Partridge?

You Alan Partridge. I am Alan Partridge. I'm living in a hotel. Your middle class, Brexit. You're sat there with your big mug in a French kitchen. With my own mug and my own tea bags and then at breakfast I get a cup their their their their their their thatatatat. their, thatatatatatatat. that. that. their, what thatetic, what thatetic, what thatetic, what thatetic, what my god. Oh, the to. Oh, the the the the the the the the the the t. t. t. Oh, I. I. I. I. I tip. I tip. I tip. I tip. I tip. I tip. I get the tip. the the tip. the tip. tip. the the tue tue tue tue tue tue tue tue. the the the the tip. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the t. t. t. tip. tip. tip. tue. tue. tue. tue. tu. tu. tu tu tu tu tu tu tu tu tu tu tu tu tu tu tu tu tu tue tue tue ta on holiday and it was in the sun and I could see the mug and the tea bag like glissing in the sun by the pool it disgusted me I saw on your Instagram and it disgusted a lot of people but my only issue is not if someone's into tea you're into tea you love tea but I think you do tea wrong it's too milky and weak and fee tips I don't care that's because that's because that's because that's because that's because that's because that's because that's because that's because that's because that's because that's because that's because that's because that's because that's because that's because that's because that's because that's because that's because that's that's that's that's because that's because that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's the that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that My tea set up is one Yorkshire tea bag or PG tips. I don't care.

So you don't mind about that? No, what I do mind about is I hate any posh tea. I hate it. Right. It's not strong enough. Teapots can fuck off. OK. I hate tea pots. They give you weak cold tea. Okay, that's fine. So you like in the mug?

In the mug? Yorkshire or PG? Yorkshire PG. How you doing it? Hot water straight in? Boiling water on it. Dance the tea bag around. I enjoy dancing the tea bag around. With finger or spoon? Finger I like the tea. tipe around. With finger or a spoon. the boiling water will get the the the the to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get the to get the to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to get to to to to to to tom. I. I. I toe. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. I. Ia. Ia. Ia. Ia. t. t. te. te. te. te. te. te. te.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a.a. Ia for someone, you're not fingering higher. The boiling water will get rid of any germs. Oh, I'm not sure about that. No, no, that's not true. I will use a teaspoon. Don't lie now. Don't back to the tea spoon.

Don't back because you get your little fingers in everyone's mouths. I'm not getting back into that situation where people called me a weirdo for drinking the cat water. That is so beyond weird to the point of you should be sectioned. That is different. This is perverted. That was inshassionable. I'm just a nice man trying to live his life. You're little fingers. Do you want to cover a tea?

If I went, do you want a glass of water? A little finger in it. I don't put my fingers in someone's tea. I use a teaspoon. I think you're lying but carry on. But do you know what what does my head in? Yeah. You can ask for it's this. I will. People who use the teaspoon and then they put it down on the side creating a little tea puddle. I hate the tea puddle. Do you hate someone sticking the fingers. I hate the tree. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. th. th. thin. th. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thin. thoomk. thoomk. thoomk. thoome. thoomorrow. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. tho. thoes. thoes. Yeah. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. th. th. don't do that. Okay so when you're doing your own you dance it around with your finger burn your fingers yeah and I feel hard. Straight the bin you feel hard and then milk and then milk and how you're stirring that top of your knob dance it around? No it's just the tea bag dancing has stirred the milk because I put the milk in and then I take the tea bag out the tea bag ever been in the cup at any point. Why not? No. Take tea bag out, make sure it's strong. I don't like tea, but I have to make it for people. Um, squeeze the bag with a spoon. Yeah. No fingers. the tipa. Yeah, that's fine.

We've all got our different ways. We all live our different ways. And I love you for who you are. Yeah, and I like you for who you are. Yeah. Actually do some of our correspondence. Rob, can we please start with some schogear's because it's so good. I want to do a schaggag and then I want more school yard, schoolgate shaggers. School gate School gate shackers, fucking out. This is basically stories from school where the parents or the teachers have been getting it on and there's been affairs and drama. You can do it anonymously, you can change everyone's names but just give us the goss. Here's one to get you in the mood. Here we go. Hi Rob, Josh and Michael. My sister-in-law's now ex-husband. Oh, right, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. Yeah, yeah.

I just gave my head around what that means. Okay, cool. My sister-in-law's now ex-husband. So this would be, for example, Rose's sister's- Your wife's sister, yeah, yeah, ex-s. Yeah, my sister-in-law at their school.

That's a classic East Ender storyline. Yeah, so he's shagging the mum of the kids best friends and then the mum's are friends. Yeah. He has been entertaining his mistress in Top London Hotel saying he was away on business. Sorry, this is written like it's like in the sun. He's been entertaining his mistress for all night romps in Top London Hotels. Top London hotels. He'd been entertained his mistress in Top London hotels saying he was away on business. My sister-in-law became suspicious when he spotted her in the playground, this is the woman who's having the affair of the husband, when she spotted her in the playground, this is the woman who's having the affair of the husband, when she spotted her in the playground wearing the exact same Gucci earrings that her husband

had bought her, the wife, the previous Christmas. What? He bought them the same present present. Well, they had gone mysteriously missing from a bedside table. You've got to be fucking kidding. And I think with these kind of expensive earrings, they'd release some for a season and they stop making them.

And also, I think if you're really good friends with someone, this is my experience of women that are friends, if you hang out a lot together, if someone's got something and you're buying something similar or the same, you say, I really like a bag, I was going to buy it. Do you mind if I get it, but I won't wear it when you wear it? That's the sort of rule, isn't it, with clothes? Yeah, Rob, I'm going to table a motion a theory that here. Okay. So, the mistress, should we call her that, that's being entertained in top London hotels with Gucci earrings. Yeah, yeah. She knows where they've come from. Okay. Obviously.

She knows what she's doing. This is a cry, not a cry for help, but a, I want to be caught. I want to be caught. This is a way of making this go to the next level. Yeah. And that's a good theory. I think people can't, it's hard to live with this much guilt, isn't it? Yeah. So he had told the the the th. th th th th he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he he that he had that he had that he had that he had that he had that he had that he had told that he that he had that he's that he that he that that that that that that that that that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to th. to to to th th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the to to to the to the to to the to the the's hard to live with this much guilt, isn't it? Yeah. So, he had told his wife that he'd put the Gucci earrings in the safe for safekeeping. But what he'd actually done was got a new fake Gucci box off Amazon and re-gifted them to the mistress. You've got to be fucking kidding me. One of the other moms at the school and the kids are best friends. I'm the the the the the the other guy's a t-okay. Josh, now this is where this school-grown shagggaw story becomes perfect for me and you. There's two really important moments in this story that's coming up that can sum us up better. Because for me it feels like it's already climaxed. Like it's mad. You've got two more full-body orgasms coming your way. Okay, can I just dig down a bit further? Yeah, do you dig as far as you want, baby? I've got yeah. So it's a safe in his house and the woman's just allowed to, she's got looked in

the safe, the box is in there and it's an empty Gucci earrings. Well, they're just not in the safe. But it feels like maybe the safe, maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe, the safe, the safe, the safe, the safe, the safe, the safe, the same, the safe, the safe, the safe, the safe, the safe, the safe, the safe, the safe, the safe, the safe, the safe, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, thi, th. th. th. th. th. th. th. Do as far as far th. Do as far th. Do as far th. Do as far th. th. Do as far thi, thi, thi, the the thi, thi, their thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi. thi's thi's thi's thi's thi's thi. thi's thi's thi. thi. thi. thi. thi I'm not sure about that but I think she knew at this point when she saw the earrings but when he asked her about it he just said they're in the safe. Oh it's but they weren't and I think later on they found out that he'd got a fake box of Amazon and re-gifted them. Now Josh this is where it gets very stiff and loose neck Rob Beckett and Josh Whitley. Now he actually got caught out on a match of the day highlights. What you've got to be fucking killing. When at halftime at the Tottenham versus West Ham, the camera zoomed in on him. What a romantic game. And his playground shag standing together and was spotted by another BDI dad at the school.

Oh my god, yes, please. Imagine watching back to the day day and you see two parents from the school gates that are having an affair. So that's the little Josh Whitakam bit of the story there. I'm going to say it, if I was watching Match of the Day, think of two parents in the school that are a random mom and dad that aren't together Rob. Is it bad that I've already thought of them? No that's fine. Now think of them sweatily going at it in a top London hotel. Now now think you've seen them on match of the day. Yeah. Would you think they're having an affair and would you do anything? What would you do in that situation? Or would you think oh I didn't realize they were friends, they must both support West Ham. I would be suspicious

immediately and then think I see the good in people Josh, so I imagine maybe they've got four tickets and the two kids that are best friends have gone and yeah, the mom and the dad of that just were like, oh we're the ones available to go because I've got friends where I would take the kids out with the wife and yeah tot. But I'd also they they they they they they're they're they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they'd they're their their they're their their their th. I would th. I would th. I would th. I would would would that. I'd their thathea. Yeah. I would would their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. I'd the. I'd the. I'd the. I'd today. today today today. today today today. the. the the the the the the the the th also go, hang on, but there's no spare seats and no children in that shot. So they're there alone. That's weird. Then I would maybe mention it to Lou and say, do you know if someone says a Westdown fan, Blah blah, blah, blah.

However, I think they were already on the way to be in court. This was just extra. Yeah. After the match of the day thing, all hell broke loose because other people find it out about it and the wife already had suspicions. It's all on eye player, you can go back and watch. You're going to go back and watch every Westam top them game for their game. So all hell broke loose and they are now divorced, which obviously we're laughing. Very sad for the kids. But let's not worry too much about that because it ruins of the fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun fun that the fun the fun. the fun. the fun. the fun. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. thi. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the. the. the. the. the. the. to. to. to. the the the to. the to the the. the. the the. the. the. th. But to add insult to injury, okay, after the divorce, one half-term recently, the dad had said he couldn't have the kids when he had previously arranged

to because he had to work and he had no money because of the divorce. So then the lady that been cheated on had booked a family holiday with her family and the kids and they were going to Dubai. Now they were taking the kids out of school two days early. They their their their their. T. T. And to. And to. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.. Oh............................................................... So. So. So. the. So. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the. the kids, and they were going to go to Dubai. Now, they were taking the kids out of school two days early. They arrived at checking at the airport. Oh no. And unbelievably, the affair man walked past them, cue in at the economy line and straight up to first class. Yeah, you fucking bad hand. And checked in for the same flight.

Oh no, he's going left. He's turning left left at at at at to to checking, to checking, to checking, to checking, to checking to checking to checking to checking to checking to checking to checking to checking to checking to checking to checking to checking to checking to checking to checking to checking to checking to check to check to check to check their their, their, the in for the same flight. Oh no, oh no, he's going left, he's turning left with his family and turning right. But not on his own with his new girlfriend and her kid. Oh no, in front of his own old, not his old family but his previous, and he tried to hide by pulling his hood up, you can imagine what kind of man he is. All for you. Because if the kid's seen him and he said, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, th, th, th, th, th, th, th th th th th th th th th th th th thi's thi's thi's tho, he's thi, he's thi, he's tho, he's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's th. He's their their, he's their, he's their, he's their, he's their he's their he's their he's their their th, he's their their th, he's th, he's their their th. He's going their thi, he's going thi, he's going thi's going thi's going thi's going thi's going to thin, he's going thin, he's going thoing thoing tho' thoing thi. He's thi. He's thi. He's thi, he is. Awful. You know that poor because if the kid's seen him and he said, oh dad can't come at half term and you see him with another fat. Oh don't, don't, don't. Don't, fucking hell, that's, that's horrible.

That's horrible. That is horrible. Now, we've got here. This is from Vicky Bell. What a bastard, Josh. That's the most extreme we've had in terms of a guy that just doesn't give a flying fuck. What a monster. What you'd expect of a West Hamphan? I imagine he's topped them. Ideas. Ideas abode. Ideas abo. the idea ideas above is about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about about their their their their their their is about their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their is about their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their is about their is about their is about their is about their is about their is about their is their is their is their is their their their their their their their the. tapestestestestestation. today's today's today's today's today's today's their their their their their their their their their to deliver, trying to go for things they can't achieve. And before we know it, it's an absolute mess, Spursy. That's what I think. Too good on the offense, can't defend. Keep it simple, that's what I say. Exactly. Yeah, so any more school gate shaggers. We love a bit of school gate shaggers. as a chance to vent. Yeah. And top people in.

Oh, if you want to name and shame him. No, I probably can't do that. It's against the law, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We do this first. this isn't that under the miscellaneous stuff here,

Josh and Michael. During today's podcast, series 9, episode 3, you briefly discussed how it would be interesting if listeners might name their children after you and that there might be some brothers out there called Rob and Josh. There we go. So I'm here to tell parents set the trend from hearing Rob with Josh. Love the pod, stay sexy and relatable from Anne 624 months, mother or two. There we go, so that's the first Rob and Josh out there, Josh. That is excellent. Now we need a Rob Josh and Michael.

Yeah, that's the key. Has anyone got a Robb. Michael out there let us know. Right, I'll do some boomers Josh because don't think you can actually access them in your current. I can't. Hi Rob and Josh is a boomer Rob. I've got corrected. Yeah. Age to eight I went to see the beach boys with my dad at Wembley Stadium. Wow, flying me. About 15 minutes in I began to feel really unwell the start of a stomach bug coming on tell me about it, finger tea. Dad escorted me to the bathroom and decided it was best to go back to the car, thinking he would take me home, but no, he put me in the car, told me to sleep, locked the car, and went back to watch the rest of the house. No, eight! It was a different time. The beach boys were playing Wembley stadium for a start. I do what their their their their their their their their their their their their th. th. th. th. th. th. that's is. that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that is. that is. that. that. that. that. their time the beach boys were playing Wembley Stadium for a start. I don't know what their dynamic pricing was. Yeah, that is mental isn't it?

Also, there's no readmission in it on tickets? Readmission also, Rob, being able to just park near Wembley. Yeah, I mean in a way, like, imagine the walk Boys, full stop, but how are you enjoying the Beach Boys while knowing, like the stress that must be attached to that? Do you know what I mean? What if the kid was sick? Yeah. On his own, asleep in the back of a car.

Yeah. I'd love to know what the dad said about this. People don't give a fuckk a fuck the the the the thoomk, thoomfahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah. to to to to tooom. tooom. tooom. to to to bea the to bea the their their the the the their their their their their their their their. to bea. to bea. to bea. to bea. their. their. their. their. their. the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoes. thoomboomboombushe. toda. toda. toda. toda. toda. toda. today. today. today. today. today. today back in the day do they? No. Do you want to another boomer Rob? Yes please. I want to find out when the Beach Boys Wembley Stadium gig was. Yeah, well this person is, I can That can't be right. 528 months, Michael? 44 they are. 44 and they were eight so it was 36 years ago so it was 1988. Did the Beach Boys play Wembley Stadium? Doesn't feel like the 198 does it? It feels like 70 scenes, doesn't it? I wonder whether she means arena. Beach Boys live in London, England, September 1989.

Got a video, you might see a dad carrying a child out of sleep. Oh, it's Wembley Arena. It's Wembley Arena. So I shorter walk than out of the stadium, but still bad. Oh, bloody hell, it was a long old set, 30 songs. Kid must have been in that car ages. Fuck it. I'm getting in there. Imagine that. Where. Where, where. Where, where. Where, where. Where, where. Where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, where, the the kid. there. th. the th. th. th. th. th. th. You's th. You's th. You th. You th th. You th. You there's there's there, you you there, you there, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you. You, you. You, you. You, you. You, you. You, you. You, you. You, you. You, you. You, you. You, you. You, you. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You. You's th. You's th. You's th. You's th. You th. You th. You th. You're th. You're th. You're th. You're th. You're th. You might th. You might th. You might th. You might there's there there's there there there there, you might there, you. Fuck it. I'm getting that. Imagine that. Where's your kid? I was asleep in the back of the car. Feel sick. Hopefully they don't choke on their vomit. I'm feeling a little good vibration. Get around, get around.

Get around. Uh, whoo! Uh, Dad! Got a little surfing in the US. Dad! Scratching at the window. He must have cracked the window. Couldn't treat a dog like that?

When did the crack in the window for a dog come in? Was the 80s were they people still cracking the window then? I don't know when it? I think crack in the window for a fart. Did it? Crack a window for a was the was the was the was the was the was the was the was the was the was the was the was the was the was the was the was the window in the window in the window in the window in the window in the window for a wa window for a wa window for a wa window in the window for a wa window for a wo the window for a wo the window for a wo the window for a wo th for a th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th the window for a wa the the the the the the the the the the th th the th th th in th in th th th th th th th th th th tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho tho I think crack of the window started off with fart in when it you crack a window for a fart. Did it? Crack a window for a wasp. You've had a wasp in the car on the motorway. Oh God I'm sure I told you this. Yeah I'm sure I have about when my friends are coming back from a stag do on a motorway and the one and the one in the front seat open to open to throw up. up up up up up up up up up up up up up up. to to to to the window. to the window. to the window. the the to to the the to the the the the the to the the the the the to the the the the the the to the to the the the to to to to to that that that that that that that that's that's that's that's that that that the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the to to to to to to to to to to to to to go go go go go go. to go go go go go go go go go. I I I I I the the the the that. I that's that's the thoo' that's throw. I go go go go go. I've that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's that's the that's the that in the face of the guy behind him. I've been sick out of a car down the side of it once my mom picked me up from a night out it's bad in it. Do you know I once got a stomach bug when me and Rose were driving to go away for a weekend. You need to stop putting your dirty fingers in your team

mate. Right. You're gonna bring dyspherie back. I was like I'm gonna be motorway speed so you can't pull over I was like I'm gonna be sick it just came on gonna be sick all we had was the bag the satin app had come in and Rose had to hand me the bag the satin I would come in and I had to put it on my lap and throw up while Rose who couldn't drive at the time held the steering wheel at full speed. Can you pull over? You're not allowed to just pull over on a motorway.

That's safer than being sick while you're driving, isn't it? Yeah probably but I think I was just like it came on so fast. I was just like, I'm going to be sick, I'm going to be of you know like a that kind of material like a laptop case material canvas yeah and just throw up in that and then she tipped it out of the window and then I threw up in it again oh a gutter all love and then in the hotel I just had to wash the sat nav bag because it that was rented as well. Oh Josh. Anything you want to declare when returning the car? No, no, all good, all good.

All good. Any injuries? No, that's it fine. No. A bit sick. I think I sprayed the satnav bag with deodorant to try and get rid of the stench. It doesn't work, is it? You know sick. No. to go for the odd meal out, usually the little chef or harvester. I loved a little chef. At the end of the meal, my mom used to send my brother to the toilet before the journey home and whilst he was gone, she would pay the bill. When he got back to the table, she would ask if the the to to to to to the to the to the to me, the the the to me, the the, the the, the the, to me, the the, the the, the the the the, the the, the the the, the to the the their, their, their, usually, usually, usually, their, usually, the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the, usually, usually, usually, usually, usually, usually, usually, usually, usually, usually, the the the the the the the the the the the tho, tho, tho, threat.o, threathea, threathea, threathea, threathea, tho, threathea, threathea, usually, threathea, lean across the table and say, she's going to pretend to do a runner. I know on the count of five we run.

He would cry the whole run to the car. That is such a terrible thing to do. It's making me feel better though really of like why our generation sort of anxious yeah if this was going on. She wishes to tell us that sweet come..... the sweet-and sweet-I come sweet-I come sweet-I come sweet-I come sweet-s the sweet-s the sweet-in the sweet-in the sweet-in w sweet come sweet come sweet come sweet sweet sweet sweet come sweet sweet come sweet come sweet come sweet come sweet come sweet come sweet come sweet come sweet come sweet come sweet come sweet come come come sweet come sweet come with sweet come with sweet come with sweet come with sweet come woom was sweet come woom was s scough woom was s s s s s sween was s s s s s sween was s s we c. tho th. th. to to to to to children's teeth and raisins were dead flies and can never work out whale such a fussy eater. Keep being sexy relatable. Katie from Crowthorn in Parkshire. Maybe I'm like oh your bloody woke millennial parent just too soft but I'm like when my daughter was worried. I don't want to do that to my kids. I would not find that funny or was it because it was it was they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they they th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th th thi thi tho. tho. the. tho. the. thi. the. the. the. I that's the. I was. I was. I was. I was. I was. I'm to to to to to to to to to to to to the. I the. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I th. I the. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I thi. I'm the. I'm to. I'm to. I'm too. I'm too. I'm tell. I'm tell. I'm tell. I'm tell. I'm too. I'm too. I'm too. I don't want to do that to my kids. I would not find that funny at all to make a more worried. Why is that funny? Or was it because if it was funny or did they think that actually it will make them not worry because let's make a joke at. But what you're doing is just making it. Because as far as they're concerned, everything you say as a parent is real so they are really breaking the law then and at the age. Of they will will will will will will will will will will will will will they will. I I I I I I I I I I they they they they they they they they they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they are they're. they are really. they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're they're. they're. they're. they're. they're. they are. they are. they are. they are. they are. they are. they are. they are. I I I. they are. I they are. I they're. I they're th. I th. I th. I the. I th. I thi. I theeee. I the. I they're they're obviously inter-family Bants was highly regarded in my house

but the things would be would you do the I suppose this is a countryside thing if someone had to get out to say open a gate yeah when you were driving. Right, okay that never happens to be once growing up. We didn't even have a garden gate. No, so it's not our gate, but say you were going to a campsite. And then we'd always do the drive away when the kid gets back to the door. Do you know what I mean? Oh yeah, that's that one like, as you go to open it, you drive a little bit. I think that's a bit of fun. Yeah, it's great humor and I think all children need to go through that. But what isn't fun is driving away at 70 miles an hour, hiding for half an hour, then driving back. No, that isn't fun at all. My dad used to still cutlery from restaurants. Did he? They liked a glass, if it was a nice glass, it's still that, and I hated it because I was on edge then for the whole meal, thinking we're stealing and

that's bad. Yes. And it's not funny and I'd rather just save my pocket money up and buy that glass. Yeah. I don't even like that glass and then whenever I'd go to the cupboard in the kitchen to see that glass I'd remember it and it would worry me again. Oh God. Do you know what we've got pretty deep in this episode at points. I think I am a little bit and I think we both are. We've been working quite a lot and we've had the kids off on, I feel weird. It's just I feel like mad. I feel like I feel like mad. I feel mad. You know, I feel like a bit in end of lockdown mad. And like, like, it gives off on, I feel weird. It's just, I feel like mad. Like, I feel like I'm mad.

I feel like, you know, I feel like a bit end of lockdown mad. And like, it gives me flashbacks, a lockdown of like, not having any gap to think without having to sort of do your job or be a parent. You know what I mean? I mean? I need to spend more time together. Those two or three days in Seville were just some of the greatest days of my life. I'm going to say I don't think it was about the headphones this morning. I think my breakdown

might go deeper. I think I probably would have taken that better on other circumstances. Yeah, I've had a couple of moments where I've sort of lost the plot slightly. I genuinely, so for the listener we've recorded these th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to the the the to to to to to to to to to to to to th. th. thi. thi. th. th. their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their their th. the. I the. the. I the. I the. I the. I thean. I thean. I toean. I toea. I thean. I toea. thean. I thean. recorded these two episodes back to back At the start of the second one when you said you're right and I thought I'm not I'm not I don't I'm not I'm not either I don't know what I think anymore about anything. Oh god I'm fucked. I'm not either. I'm so tired. I don't know what I think anymore about anything. Oh God I'm fucked. Well now the kids are back in school it all calm down. Yeah. But I think this is your first summer. No, no, you had that summer before. I just want to find my headphones. That's all I've wanted to do.

And now you're going to be left in your own thoughts all day because you can't put a song on. I'm going to have to go to Apple in Paris. I'm one hour to myself after watching Hilsie Cancan at the Moulin Rouge. You're going to need headphones for that. Oh God. Why do you have to watch him? Why don't you believe it as a surprise for the show? Is him getting taught and it's sort of fun? He's getting taught because... I'll be fun to watch. Yeah, and you need to kind of us being like Ant and Dec during the Bush Tucker trial situation if you know. Yeah, and chip in and chip in and stuff like that, yeah. Yeah. Oh, we'll be all right Rob. Sorry. A little bit of time. You need to not be in Paris to the try and try. to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to to be to be to be the try. the a live live live live live live live live live. to be to be the the to be to be the the to be the to be the the try. to be their their their their their their their their their their their their. their. their. their. their. their. their. their. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. try. to get back to London to go and buy some shoes and then go back to Paris again. Oh God. But look, we are, we obviously, we're very lucky to be doing joke. We love and we have a lovely life. But I feel like we're both a little bit frazzled. We're not looking for sympathy, we're just very frazzled after.

No, summer holidays we've had lots of fun with the kids, but well, doubling that. I've been working a lot this week, like, so I'm just a bit like, I feel wild. I might need a pillow scream, Josh. Right, should we do one more, one more correspondence and then small business, yeah? Okay, John, this, a boomer. Thought you might like to hear about my husband's a pometaunting incident. We live on the southern coast in Australia. Some years back, our daughter

Ruby had two special guinea pigs who lived in our garden. Nice. I think this is going to be a modern boom of parenting, isn't it? In a cage with a run which was sat on our lawn. One day, oh my God, Australia is mental Rob. Yeah, that is a bit unruly. One day a python got into the cage. Oh of course course it did. Fuck here now It proceeded to crush and then swallow poor sparkle Leaving angel carrying this corner and the python trapped its swollen belly now Preventing it from getting out for fuck sake. Am I reading this now? In a way that's a metaphor for life isn't it? Your swollen belly preventing you from leaving. Greed?

Greed, trapped by its own greed! Trapped by its own greed, and not for money, but for ego. It's not the money, it's the ego that will trap you, your big belly of greed, will keep you in the cage you once try to enter. Fuck it! And the Python is Rob Beckett and the cage is fame. Oh my big belly's got me tracked because I'm greedy because speak down, I need it but I don't want it.

And the second guinea pig is the other TV show that he always thinks he should be doing. That one last step that will make his career complete. The other guinea pigs you watching, laughing. Oh dear. Pythons take a few days to process the food out for the food for the food in their system. So once Angel had been rescued, it remained in the cage on the lawn with a guinea pig-shaped bump in its middle. When we had visitors or children came out to play, my husband Gary would ask if they wanted to see Ruby's guinea pig.

Oh, obviously enjoyed the spectrum of shock. I think it has toughened their their their toededededededededededed toed tooed us tooed us tooed us tooed and thought a great laugh Ruby less so. I think it has toughened her up or given us something discussing therapy. Love you both so much. Thanks for the show Elaine. Fuck it out. Jesus. I'm going to say it, Elaine. Thank you for your email, but it was the opposite of what I needed at this moment. Really did need that. Small business. I need a little business called, Rob goes into a room and sleeps and is left alone. I need a business called a pair of fucking headphones that for now represent whether I've got my life under control or not.

Okay, here we go. Okay, here we go. Because if I find these headphones, suddenly I'll tell myself that I'm loving my life. Hi Rob Josh, love, love, love, love the podcast the podcast, love the podcast, love the podcast, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, the podcast, the podcast, the love love the podcast. I've been listening for the past few months and I find myself mentioning you to in conversations almost every day. Can't wait for your new stand-up show and looking forward to more smart TV episodes. I want to give a quick shout out to my friends a raising wellness hub, Physico in Bromley. I respect Bromley. They offer physio and rehab, reform of Pilates and Yoga, personal training and one to

one Pilates. The team there is fantastic. They are the best in the business. They've got doctors, physiotherapists, osteopaths and some top-notch Pilates and yoga instructors, too. Anyone is in the Bromley area and is looking to help to recover from an injury, get fit, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, get, to, get, to, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, their, and their, and the, and the, and the, and their, and, and thom, and thom, and, and, and, and, and, and their, and, and their, and their, and, and, and, and their, and, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their, and their.e, their.e, their.e, their.e, the, theole, the, theaseaughe, the, the, theaseaughe, and their-Y-S-I-C-O is the place to go. You can find them on Instagram. At, oh they've had a nightmare Rob. Go on, give it to me. At underscore, never a good start. Fizzy, which is P-H-Y-S-I underscore, co. Right, but spelled P-H-H-I-I-S-I-I-I, P-S-S-S-C-C-S-S-S-S-C-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-I-I-S-S-I-I-I-I- is the- is the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the the-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-S-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-S-I-I-S-I-S-I-I-S-I-I-S-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-S-Y. No, P-H-I-S-I underscore co. Fizzy. Thanks for reading this out. Have a wonderful day. Best wishes

Christina Yoliver. Go on, Christina. Now, hello, I've been listening to your podcast from the start and has helped me through lots of parenting puzzles and its current role is to keep me sane when doing the endless bedtime ti-time with my two-year-year-year-year-year-year-year-year-year-year-year-year-year-year-year-year-year-year-year-year-up-up-up-up-up-up-up-up-up-up-up-up-up-up-up-up-up-ncnenenewo-up-up-up-up-up-up-up-up-nigh-no-nigh-nigh-s. to-nigh-n't-n't-n. two-year-old. Thank you for all you do for us parents. Now, I would love it if you could give a small business shout out to one of my new mom friends from my five-year-old school. She started up her jewelry business after having two kids and dedicates her artistic talents to making beautiful jewelry inspired, buy it and for all women, not just mothers.

She makes unique jewelry from breast milk. What? What? She makes unique jewelry from breast milk. I have a necklace which is my pride and joy. I know it sounds weird but I promise it is beautiful. And has also recently started doing fingerprint jewelry too. Not forgetting the fathers out there. She does cuffling fingerprints which are just gorgeous. You can find her on Holly Hannah. That's H. O. L, L.h.h.h.n.a.a.a.a. to hanna.jo. Hollyhanna jewelry. Now, did you provide the breast milk? Is that what happens?

I don't know. The fingerprint pendants are actually quite nice. It's like they're pressed in. I don't know how the old breast milk one's work, but Hollyhanna will let you know. Go on holly hannahanna hanna hanna hanna hanna hanna hanna hanna hana holi holi holi hol- the th hol- th. th. th. th. th. th. th. th, th, th, th, th, th, th, tho, tho, tho, th, th, tho, tho, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, th, which th, which th, which th, which th, which th, which th, which th, th, which th, tho, thooooooooooooooooooooooooo, which th, which thoooooooo, th, th, Hollyhanna dot com and find out. Breast milk jewelry, Jesus, all new in it? All new. Oh it looks actually quite nice space so you get how do you turn breast milk into jewelry? Do want to know Josh? Yeah I do. Now I won't bore you with nitty gritty but below gives you an overview. First I would ask for two times 10 mill of breast milk. Not a huge amount. No, this can be frozen or fresh. It doesn't matter how long it has been in the freezer, it will still be perfect for creating a piece that you can treasure. I won't speak to a woman who had saved her last stash for 30 years. Now that's that's a bigger problem than the fucking jewelrytakes a few days. Your breast milk, they basically looks like little sort of resin stones.

What color is the stone? Well, the one from this lady from 30 years ago is green. I'm joking, it's a white, creamy milky color, Josh. Oh, lovely. They look really nice, but if I went, that's my breast milk. Oh, is it? It's definitely a talking point. See you next week. We'll be charged up. We'll have a little rest. It will all be good to go. Yeah. Say it like you mean it, Josh. Yes! See you then. Bye.