Passion Struck with John R. Miles - Reinvent Yourself: The Journey from Ordinary to Extraordinary w/John R. Miles EP 513

Episode Date: September 27, 2024

In this engaging podcast episode, John Miles, high-performance coach and host of the award-winning Passion Struck podcast, shares his transformative framework for unlocking personal purpose and achieving extraordinary growth. Kicking off the Live Life Better Author Series at Book + Bottle, co-hosted by Nanette Wiser of Radio St. Pete, John delves into the power of intentional living.He emphasizes saying "yes" to opportunities that align with your true self and "no" to distractions. Drawing from his journey as a Navy officer and Fortune 50 executive, John explains how real fulfillment comes from serving others and pursuing your own dreams. He introduces practical tools like the importance versus urgency matrix to help prioritize what truly matters.John also shares personal stories, including a life-changing moment that pushed him to embrace his calling and help others find their purpose. He encourages listeners to build their "courage muscles" by taking intentional steps toward their goals and surrounding themselves with positive influences.The episode inspires listeners to pursue their passions, embrace reinvention, and recognize that the path to an extraordinary life is within reach for everyone willing to take the leap.Link to the full show notes:   https://passionstruck.com/reinvent-yourself-the-journey-to-extraordinary/In this episode, you will learn:The significance of mindset shifts, behavior shifts, and the psychology of progress in personal development.The concept of living intentionally versus living on autopilot, illustrated through the metaphor of a pinball life.The role of courage muscles in pursuing your passions and overcoming self-limiting beliefs.The value of surrounding yourself with positive influences and recognizing toxic relationships, referred to as "mosquitoes."The importance of self-control and intentionality in achieving your goals.Personal anecdotes from John Miles about his journey and the transformative events that led him to write "Passion Struck."Practical exercises, such as the importance versus urgency choice matrix, to help prioritize actions in life.Sponsors:Babbel: Master a new language with Babbel’s comprehensive learning system. Get 60% off at babbel.com/PASSION.Hims: Start your journey to regrowing hair with Hims. Get your free online visit at hims.com/PASSIONSTRUCK.Quince: Discover luxury at affordable prices with Quince. Enjoy free shipping and 365-day returns at quince.com/PASSION.For more information on advertisers and promo codes, visit Passion Struck Deals.Special Announcement:Join us for the Passion Struck 50-Week Challenge! This year-long journey is designed to help you unlock personal growth, fulfillment, and self-discovery through weekly challenges that push your boundaries and enhance every aspect of your life. Join a supportive community, benefit from expert guidance, and start your transformative journey today. Learn more and sign up here.Tune In:If you found this episode insightful, please share it with others who might benefit from these powerful lessons. Don’t forget to join the conversation on social media using the hashtag #PassionStruck and connect with John R. Miles on Twitter and Instagram at @John_RMiles.Catch More of Passion Struck:Check My solo episode on The Power of Choice — Why Our Choices Are PowerfulCatch my episode with Emile's good friend Jamil Zaki on how hope can conquer cynicismWatch my interview with Alex Edmans on Critical Thinking in a Post-truth WorldCan't miss my episode with Jeffrey C. Walker On The Criticality of Collaboration in Systems ChangeMy episode with Lori Gottlieb on Embracing Self-Compassion for a Better LifeIf you liked the show, please leave us a review—it only takes a moment and helps us reach more people! Don’t forget to include your Twitter or Instagram handle so we can thank you personally.How to Connect with John:Connect with John on Twitter at @John_RMiles and on Instagram at @John_R_Miles. Subscribe to our main YouTube Channel here and to our YouTube Clips Channel here. For more insights and resources, visit John’s website.Want to explore where you stand on the path to becoming Passion Struck? Take our 20-question quiz on Passionstruck.com and find out today!

Welcome to Passion Struck. Hi, I'm your host, John R. Miles, and on the show, we decipher the secrets, tips, and guidance of the world's most inspiring people and turn their wisdom into practical advice for you and those around you. Our mission is to help you unlock the power of intentionality so that you can become the best version of yourself. If you're new to the show, I offer advice and answer listener questions on Fridays. We have long form interviews the rest of the week with guests ranging from astronauts to authors, CEOs, creators, innovators, scientists, military leaders, visionaries, and athletes. Now, let's go out there and become passion struck. Hey, passion struck fam.

I am absolutely thrilled to welcome you back to episode 513 of the Passion Struck podcast. You, yes you, are the driving force behind this movement, and I can't thank you enough for your continued energy, passion, and commitment to growing and living intentionally. Your dedication is what keeps this community thriving, and I am so grateful to have you with us. If this is your first time tuning in, welcome to the PassionStruck family. You've just joined a group of people who are all about igniting purpose and living boldly with intentional action. We are so excited to have you with us on this journey of transformation.

Before we dive in to today's episode, let me take a moment to highlight some incredible conversations we've had earlier this week. On Tuesday, I had a fantastic discussion with Dr. Michael Gervais, where we dove deep into his insights on high performance, mindset mastery, and how to rise above the fear of other people's opinions. And on Thursday, Dr. Deborah Egerton joined me to explore the Enneagram and how understanding our unique personality types can lead to personal growth, stronger relationships, and greater emotional intelligence. If you haven't checked out those episodes yet,

I highly recommend giving them a listen. For those of you who want to dive even deeper into these topics, don't forget to sign up for my Live Intentionally newsletter. Each week, I send out practical tools, exclusive insights, and exercises to help you apply the lessons from the podcast directly to your life.

Head over to passionstruck.com slash newsletter and take the next step toward living intentionally today. Plus, if you're wondering where to start with the podcast, we've made it super easy with our episode starter packs. With over 500 episodes to explore, it can feel overwhelming. So we've curated playlists for you based on themes like leadership, mental health, and behavior science. Check them out on Spotify or at passionstruck.com slash starter packs to dive in. Now, for today's episode, we're doing something a little bit different.

Last week, I had the privilege of doing a live moderated event at Book and Bottle in St. Petersburg, where I discussed my book, Passion Struck. It was an incredible experience, and I'm excited to bring you the recording of that event today. The conversation was moderated by Nanette Weiser from Radio St. Pete,

and we dug deep into the core concepts of Passion Struck, what it means to live with intentionality, and how the principles from the book can help you transform your life. This event was a powerful discussion about living with purpose, and I can't wait for you to hear it. Whether you've read Passion Struck or are new to its ideas, this conversation offers fresh insights and actionable advice to help you create a life of meaning and fulfillment. And before we jump

into the recording, I just want to say thank you for your continued support. If this episode resonates with you, we'd love for you to leave us a 5-star review and share it with your friends and family. Your ratings and reviews help more people discover the show and it means the world to us. Now, without further ado, let's dive into my live event at Book and Bottle where Nanette Weiser and I talk all things passion struck. Thank you for choosing passion struck and choosing me to be your host and guide on your journey to creating an intentional life. Now, let that journey begin.

We are really good friends at Book and Bottle. I'm Nanette Weiser. I'm the Radio St. Pete news director, and with me tonight is John Miles, who I'm telling you I feel like howdy-doody standing next to him. This man introduced people better than anyone, but with that being said, we are delighted that we've been allowed to come tonight. Book and Bottle is a partner of Radio St. Pete. Dominic Hoeworth, can we have Dominic Thin? He's not here, but he is on Radio St. Pete

once a month to talk about books. And this is the kickoff of our Live Life Better author series with John Miles. And I wanna thank every one of you for joining us. I see some future podcasters here, I see some of our current podcasters here. John says you were born to live your passion. Well, thanks to John Miles,

I've lived mine. I decided to launch an online on-air magazine for Radio St. Pete. This is all your fault, John. All your fault. And having done this in January, let me tell you something. It's like working with these podcasters and in particular, John, it's like Christmas morning opening presents. Every day we're in studio. Our studios at Thrive DTS. John with 48 million downloads on multiple platforms. Come on, let me get to you. Come on, let me get to you. John hooked me on his passion when he wrote,

we're often pulled in countless directions and bombarded by expectations and noise. When you say yes, what to what truly resonates, you open a door to opportunities and nurture your growth and purpose. So I'm gonna ask all of you today to listen carefully to John, what are you saying yes to today?

And what, more importantly, what are you saying no to? I'm gonna ask you, no or yes? How many yeses are here? Who is open to the possibility? Okay, there's no naysayers here. So I'd like you to meet John Miles in a nutshell. He's a leading high performance coach, author, speaker, decorated veteran, and multi-industry CEO. He's a highly quoted, viewed,

and followed personal development trader. And he is the host of the highly rated and award-winning Passion Struck podcast. Which won the Stevie IBA Best Business Book of the Year? What? What? How much? Listen, I'm a shameless huckster.

I love everything that John does. Here is the really important part. This is what John's gonna talk about tonight. This is a transformative framework for unlocking your purpose, not his purpose, not my purpose, but your purpose, right? For a capacity for growth. And before I turn this over to John,

I'm just gonna say, Passion Struck isn't just a book or a podcast. It's a roadmap to the life of significance. And I hope that all of you will embrace this. John, with no further ado, is going to read an excerpt. Take it away, John. Okay, well. What a great question.

What a great question. Well, first off, thank you everyone who came. It means the world to me that you're all here. And I'm glad that we sold out this event. Thank you for Book and Bottle for putting this on. And I love, since I'm a local person to support the local bookstores. So thank you very much, Andy.

And Nanette, thank you for pulling this all together. My pleasure. So I am gonna read from chapter 15. And for those of you who aren't familiar with this book, the way it's organized is into three parts. So the first part, I introduce mindset shifts. So the first part I introduce mindset shifts. The second part I introduce behavior shifts. And the third section, I go into something that I call the psychology of progress.

And that's where I'm going to be reading this from is chapter 15, which is the start of never ignore the physics of progress. And I'm going to start out with a quote from Nelson Mandela. There's no passion to be found plain small and settling for a life that is less than the one that you are capable of living. And I'm going to jump forward, unlocking the three keys to an extraordinary life, aspiration, ambition, and actions. In a transformative interview with renowned executive coach and best-selling author Marshall Goldsmith, he shared profound insights about the three keys to living a truly extraordinary life. Goldsmith's words resonated powerfully. Aspiration, ambition, and actions.

These three elements define a great life. Aspiration, the first key, compels us to ponder our purpose and the reason behind our existence on this earth. It extends far beyond simply showing up each day. Aspiration knows no finish line. It propels us to continuously reach for something greater. The second key, ambition, aligns our aspirations with tangible achievements. And ambition drives us to set meaningful goals

that contribute to our overarching aspirations. These goals provide the framework for our accomplishments, but they're not an endpoint in themselves. Rather, they serve as milestones on our journey towards fulfillment. However, it's the third key, our actions, where the true essence of life resides. Our present actions, the choices we make, which I often call micro-choices, the steps

we take are what shape our reality. It is through our engagement in the day-to-day process of life itself that we manifest our aspirations and transform our ambitions into tangible outcomes. Yet amidst this vast game of life, many individuals find themselves lost in the action phase. They become consumed by the never-ending cycle of busyness, failing to align their actions with their aspirations and ambitions. In doing so, they lose sight of the greater purpose and potential

that awaits them. To lead an extraordinary life, which is the topic of today, it's imperative that we harmonize these three elements, aspiration, ambition, and actions. By ensuring their alignment, we tap into our innate capacity for greatness and fulfillment. We transcend the ordinary and embark on a journey of purpose, growth, and significant impact." And I go on to say during an insightful interview that I did with my friend Robin Sharma, he beautifully encapsulated the essence of this concept. The thousand mile journey begins with a single step. It's easy to put icons like Kobe, Jordan, Ali, Mandela, Elon Musk, Oprah Winfrey, Serena Williams,

and many others on a pedestal. One of the things a lot of people do, John, is they say, well, these people are just not like us, or they say these people are cut from a different cloth. And the reality is we all have gifts and natural talents, but the key is these people had an idea and then they continually practice. They stayed with the mission day after day

until they went from being an amateur to a professional, a beginner to a master. Think of it another way. Let's say you're driving a car and it runs out of fuel. At this point, you have two options. First, you can put your hazard lights on and hope someone will come and help you, meaning you give up, or you could choose the second option, opening the door, putting your shoulder against it, and beginning to push, taking action.

What you would notice is that at first pushing is extremely hard. Why? Because you have no momentum. But once you reach five, 10, 100 yards down the road, suddenly you're rolling at a reasonable speed, bound for the nearest gas station. The same is true of actively pursuing your purpose. The most challenging part of any journey of this nature is the first step. You need to remind yourself that you've got nothing to lose.

You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. The Church of John Miles. John, what came first, the book or the podcast? That is an interesting question, and people would often say it's the podcast that came first because I have so many of the podcast interviews in the book and the reality is I wrote the book or major portions of it first and When I came up with this I started to go to agents when I was still crafting the manuscript and the agents Said to me well, you're known as a business executive. I was a Fortune 50 executive before, but no one knows you in this genre

and you really have no expertise in delivering a message of personal development. And so they said, you absolutely have no platform at all. And they were right from this standpoint. And so what they said is you need to get out and speak. At this time, it was in the middle of the pandemic, and the only place I could speak was doing virtual sessions. And if you've ever done these, you can't really judge the feedback from the audience very

well. So I looked at all my alternatives and thought, I will start a podcast and test the concepts out and see how well they resonate. And then they resonate. Forty-eight million downloads is just unbelievable. Later. John, you have to work with Hutzpah. You've called Seth Groten.

You've interviewed all kinds of famous people. Tell us a little bit about some of your favorite interviews and also how do you have the Hutzpah to get a hold of them? Do you get ghosted? How do you do it? Because as an interviewer, I take off my chapeau to you. Well, I will tell you a great example of this as I'm not sure any of you know who Gabby Bernstein is,

but I had Gabby, who's a New York Times number one bestselling author on the show. But the backstory of this is she said no to me over 12 times. And I started asking her when the podcast was smaller, and as it got bigger I kept going back and back, and finally it was on that 12th time that she finally said yes,

and I find that's what it's like. I think that there's just a time and place that these people are supposed to come on, and so when I get turned down, which is often, I don't look at it as a stopping point. I look at it as it's just the right opportunity and the universe hasn't opened up for the two of us to come together. So that's part of the process, but it's for every 10 to 20 people I reach out to, I get maybe one. So it's gotten, as the show has gotten

a lot more popular, it's now a lot easier, but at first it was very difficult. Who's on your want list still? Let's speak to the universe. Who do you still want? Well, I wrote to Matthew McConaughey today. He's someone I've wanted to have on the show. I want Deepak Chopra. I am trying to get Michael Jordan. And a couple of the authors that I haven't gotten

that I would still really love to get is Jordan and a couple of the authors that I haven't gotten that I would still really love to get is Dan Heath, if anyone who knows who Dan is. He and his brother write a number of self-help books and he's got one coming up. And then another person who I think it's gonna be difficult is gonna be Dr. Joe Dispenza. And Dr. Joe is very difficult to get on a show, so I'm hoping I will get him.

So I'm hoping that all of you will go onto the Facebook of these people and say, we just heard John Miles say that you would be terrific on my podcast. Right. Man of the universe, right John? John, you had experience as a Navy officer and Fortune 50 executive,

and it shaped your approach to leadership and personal mastery. What did you learn hands on that you've taken to this book, Good or Bad? What I think I learned from my time at the Naval Academy and then being a naval officer was two things. One, that anything that you want to accomplish, it's very difficult to do it on your own. And that the same thing goes with this book, the podcast, everything.

If it wasn't for the people who supported me, I would have never gotten it accomplished. The other thing I learned is that, especially when you're in the service, the orders that you give have consequences and some of those can be life altering. I then took that in the Fortune 50 world. The biggest difference I found is while you're in the military,

you give an order and people respond to it. When you are in the civilian world, you give an order, and that's not necessarily the same thing. So I really had to learn, um, how do you win over hearts and minds of people? Because leading in an organization is completely different than it is in the civilian world than it is in the military.

So you were inspired to write Passionstruck, and how has your personal journey influenced themes in the book other than at work? Growing up, childhood, people you met, inspirations, etc. It's interesting, and my son is in the room, and he probably doesn't remember this, but I remember I was a CIO at Dell. We were living in Austin, and I started to be getting these manifestations. When I would meditate, when I would think about things,

I was getting this clear gut feeling that the path I was on was not the path I was destined to be on. And when I would really go further into this, I was getting these messages that were telling me I am supposed to serve the bored, beaten, broken, battered of the world. And here I am, this executive, I had no idea what that even meant. How am I supposed to serve that group of people? It's not as if you want to send a marketing message out

that I'm going to serve the beaten and battered and broken of the world. So I didn't know what to do with it. So I think like many people, I ignored it for a period of time. And I think what ends up happening is when you have a calling and you're ignoring it, it gets louder. It starts coming

to you in different ways. And so one of the most difficult exercises I put myself through was something that I call the one word exercise, meaning at the end of the day, those are the people I'm trying to help. What is the one word I am trying to solve that all of them are facing? And I started going into this and I thought, well, maybe it could be apathy or maybe it could be hopelessness or helplessness. And I started to think those are symptoms that these people feel,

but it's not the core of what's happening. And at the core, what I really felt was a systematic thing that's happening today is so many people have a sense of unmattering. And that's exactly what I had reached. You get out of bed and you feel like nothing that you're doing matters. And I realized looking back that I'd been making

other people's dreams come true, but I hadn't been making my own dreams come true. And it was time to cross that chasm. And I'm going to hold your feet to the fire and say, what is that one small actionable step that you took and that someone else can take to get to live more intentionally? What was the one step that you took that took you there? And what can our friends here and those listening to us can take to live more intentionally?

So I think if we're, it's easy to say if I had a do-over, I would have started on this journey sooner, because I wish I would have. I would have had more time to be creative and to do things, but time happens when it's supposed to. For me, there was really an impetus that happened that started this all. In December, in November 2017,

I had taken my daughter to school, dropped her off, she went to Shorecrest, and I went to the gym. I was going to Orange Theory at that point. That's where I'd met several people in this room, was at Orange Theory, and that day, there was an electrical fire at the gym, and the fire trucks came and I went home. What I didn't realize was that there was a perpetrator who had been canvassing me and

watching my whereabouts. And so when I came home, I walked in on an active burglary where that assailant actually had my gun and pointed it at me. And so I was lucky to get out of that. And I was just starting to process it when four days later, one of my best friends, Tim, a local St. Pete person, unfortunately decided that his life wasn't

worth living and he ended up taking his life by jumping off the skyway. And those two events really hit me over the next couple of months and I just, I came to this conclusion, what am I waiting for? And that was really the impetus that got me going. Now, once I reached that point, I went and started to see a career coach who was a psychologist and he had me look at my life and he had me imagine it just as these two stools

that we're sitting on and he said, I want you to think about how you've been living your life. And I realized that it was out of balance. I had been living my life for many years with one of those pillars underneath me being out of whack, and that was the constant grind. I was really focused on achievement, success, titles, worthily things. And what I really had to do was reorient my life on how I wanted that stool to look if I were living my life differently. And once you reach that point, then you've got to pick one thing in your life that needs

more addressing than anything else and pick that and start working on it. And once you do, what I found is that opens up a ripple effect where not only are you working on that one thing, you're working on many areas of your life and you're starting to see many positive changes that come about. You talk a lot about the pinball life and what advice would you give to someone who feels like they're bouncing from one thing to the next without a clear sense of purpose and direction as you were before you found your three-legged stool and what those three legs should be? Well, this is a question I love to get.

I think about this question, I think we are often told or we hear, you're living on autopilot. You're doing this on autopilot. And to me, autopilot is something that I think we can all gravitate towards because we've all heard it. But when I think of autopilot is something that I think we can all gravitate towards because we've all heard it. But when I think of autopilot and what that means, every pilot I know who, when they're putting the plane on autopilot, they're typically putting the plane in a positive direction

of where they want to go. I don't think that's the way many of us are really living today. I think in behavior science, there's really two states that people live in. State one is the unconscious mind. State two is the conscious mind. And I think so many of us live in state one without a clear sense of focus and conscious engagement. And as I started to think about

what a better analogy might be or a better metaphor, when I was growing up as a kid, I loved the game of pinball. And as I think about the ball, and this whole purpose of this book is to really teach you how to be more intentional with your life, a pinball itself is completely the opposite. It is extremely unintentional in its movements. In fact, if you're not influencing it, it's just bouncing off of things. And to me, what a pinball life is when you're letting the game of pinball play you instead of you learning how to master the game.

And it's a great analogy of how to look at life. So how do you go from living the majority of your life in state one to more of your life in state two and being conscious about the choices that you're making. You quote Mark Twain and he of course famously said, 20 years from now you'll be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the one things that you did.

Have you been disappointed about the things you haven't done where you are right now and what's coming up next for you in addition to more podcasts and more interviews and hopefully some more national attention? What is still on that list that is in your focus to live intentionally? So I'm going to answer that in one second because I didn't fully give an answer to your last question.

Okay. So you asked me, how do you break out of living a pinball life? And I didn't answer the question. So I would encourage you to do a simple exercise, the importance versus urgent choice matrix. So if you think about, you've got two axes and one is importance, the other is urgency, and you think about a four by four quadrant

and you start labeling it, if something that you need to do is important and urgent, then you need to do is important and urgent, then you need to do it. If something is urgent but it's not important, then you need to plan it. If something is important but not urgent, you need to delegate it. And if something fits neither of those quadrants, you need to eliminate it. And I think too many of us fall into this trap of busyness where we keep doing what feels important,

but it's really not. And so if you can start getting into the habit of focusing on that right-hand quadrant, it makes such a critical difference into how the choices in that choice architecture that you make. So onto your question about, I went into this trying to help people cross the chasm of,

instead of living the life they feel they ought to be living, how do you start living your ideal life, the life that you could be? I think that chasm can be really daunting because oftentimes, if you picture this as it's a mountainside and there's this large canvas where you can see the path that you're going on and you can see the mountaintop across from you and you can see where that leads you, the scariest part is that leap of faith between going from one to the other.

And so I think I'm at a starting point where I am starting to give people some guidance on how to do that, but this is just one of the first steps. And so to me, there's a lot more books, courses, podcast episodes, different versions of the podcast that have yet to be released that are things I still want to do for Mark Twain. You mentioned scary. I would look around the room and I would say each one of us

has a passion project and we're a little bit afraid and you talk about the courage muscles and you talk about the importance of the concept of courage muscles. How can you build them? How does it work and why is it important not only in the world but in initiating and following through on your intentional life? So I have a good friend named Scott Simon who's an author as well and he wrote this great book called Scare Your Soul and when I think about this topic I think about his book because everything that I'm talking about here with passion struck is doable in your life. But what ends up happening is so many of us get stuck in our own self-limitating

beliefs. And so where courage really plays a role here is I'm not talking like huge courage, like you have to go into a burning building. What I'm talking about is learning how to do small courage movements that slowly but surely expand your zone of what boundaries you're willing to explore. And that's what this whole courage muscle expansion is really about. It's like intentionality.

To me, being intentional is like exercising a courage muscle. It takes courage to be intentional about how you want to treat someone. It takes courage to accept for yourself the boundaries on how you're willing to be treated and how other people in your world treat you. It takes courage to do a lot of these things. And to me, at its core, if you want to be more intentional about your passion, you have to learn how to be more courageous.

And a good example of this is, for me, it might look like I love to do public speaking, but it's one of the things I really detest the most to do. And as this book was coming out and I knew I was gonna be doing a lot more of it, I knew I had to start testing my courage muscles again. And so I decided to sign up for something that for me is extremely frightening

and completely out of character for me, which is improv. So for the past 18 months, I've been doing improv classes and it's one of these things where you have to set the expectation for yourself. For me, my expectation is I wanted to feel as uncomfortable as I possibly could. I know that. Yeah. It'll do that. is I wanted to feel as uncomfortable as I possibly could.

And it'll do that. And I also knew that, especially like the Q&A we're going to do today, that I needed to think quicker on my feet. And it happens a lot in podcasts that I'm on, or even when a podcast guest asks you something. So Improv was a great way to do that. And I think Eugenie and what they're doing over at Green Light Cinema is phenomenal. So I will give if you've ever wanted to try improv and you want to do it in a no pressure way, they're great. Yes, and hats off to Eugenie. She's walking the red carpet in France right now for Fashion Week. Yay, Eugenie, Studio 12.

John, you're a lifelong learner. I think you actually do this so that you can take a PhD from each person you talk to. So I'm curious to know, what is the thing that someone has told you and these influential thinkers that surprised you, surprised you, awed you, took you to another level? Can you share some of that? So it's interesting. We look at some of the people I profiled in the book were Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk and Oprah Winfrey and Dwayne The Rock Johnson. There are lots of those, but there are other people in the book that I call everyday heroes

who aren't those big names. But the commonality that I found across all of them is that those who really break out have a constant pursuit of reinvention, meaning they know the world around them is changing. And it's interesting. You think of someone like Jeff Bezos, and it would have been easy for him to reach a certain level and to just say, I'm going to coast. But he didn't do that. He constantly pushes the envelope of Amazon, but when he was there, but also for himself personally. And it wasn't only my work that discovered this.

I happened to interview a guy named Dan Schwabel, who's a New York Times bestselling author. He works for this think tank called Future Workplace. And in addition to the hundreds of people I've interviewed, he interviewed 1,200. And we were talking, and he came to the same conclusion. It's this constant pursuit of reinvention, especially in the world today as rapidly as it's changing. One of the things I get often asked by kids One of the things I get often asked by kids my son's age is,

what do I do in this age of AI, robotics, everything else? Well, when I was starting my career, the forces against me were different, but I was feeling the same thing that they're feeling now. And I knew if I wanted to stay on top of it and to get ahead, I needed to be ahead of what was coming. So I always tried to live my life by looking four to five years in the future and looking for skill sets that I needed to have that I didn't, that I needed to learn to do so that I was always staying ahead of my peer group. And I think that there are things

that are always gonna be needed, especially things like emotional intelligence and how to interact with humans because no matter what we do, humans are not gonna be replaced. But I think we're gonna have to learn as technology becomes more profound in our lives, even than it is today,

how to overcome the way people feel when they're having to deal with this technology. I'm curious to know, you have four pillars that you talk about in the book, the mindset shift, the behavior shifts, deliberate action, intrinsic motivation. And I'm wondering what you feel people overlook that you would like to point out to them

that they might not see on the first go through the book. Because I've read this book now three times. And every time I read it, it reveals itself a little bit more. So. I would go into one of the principles in the book that I get asked about the most. And it's a chapter I call the mosquito auditor.

And to me, this is an important principle because what I'm really talking about here is if you want to get further in your life, one of the things that is commonly the biggest barrier to doing that is the people who you surround yourself with in your life, meaning they could be family members, they could be your best friends Meaning they could be family members, they could be your best friends, they could be relatives, they could be coworkers.

And oftentimes they're toxic and you don't even realize it. So this chapter, I tried to make it fun. So I laid out, I tried to figure out what's a way that I could approach this. And I happened to be listening to a radio show and the announcer came on and said, what's a way that I could approach this and I happened to be listening to a radio show and the announcer came on and said, what's the most dangerous animal on the planet?

I've already given it away. But people were saying it's this type of snake or it's this type of shark or this or that. And the answer is the mosquito. And just like a mosquito, which is invisible influence oftentimes in our life, so are these people who are the most toxic. And so I came up with three different mosquitoes

that I described. There's the invisible suffocator, which is that person in your life who's the half glass, glass half empty type of person who is always telling you why something is not gonna work out. You get this great promotion opportunity at work, well, it's going to have all these downsides,

so you can't take it. There's the PETA, which is the pain in the ass. These are these... And then there's this one called The Bloodsucker. And if anyone's a fan of Terry Cole's work, I love her books. She wrote The Boundary Boss. She's got another great book coming out here shortly.

She has something in there called a boundary destroyer and that's really what a blood sucker is. They're that person that wants whatever they want that makes them better and they're gonna drain your swamp in order to get it. So the quicker you can start recognizing what those mosquitoes are, and I just gave three of their many more,

the more opportunity you have to put up proper boundaries in your own life to ward against them. John, when haven't I asked you, before we open up to the audience for questions, John, what haven't I asked you about the book that you want to share as a takeaway with this crowd tonight on your first book signing here? I'm surprised you didn't ask me,

is there someone I had on the podcast who emulates what's in Passionstruck? Is there someone on the podcast who emulates this? Listen, I am a very good trained monkey. Is there someone on the podcast who real slides? I'm gonna give an answer that you're not expecting. Why don't you interview yourself? You're gonna have an AI person here.

I love John. It'd be easy for me to pick someone famous. And when I was first thinking about this, I was going to pick Oksana Masters. You might have heard of her recently because she just won two gold medals in the Paralympic Games. And she is a phenomenal example. But I'm going to highlight someone I had on the podcast that none of you have probably ever heard of.

His name is Nate Dukes. And Nate today is a pastor in his church. He's the youth pastor and he's transforming the lives of troubled youth where he lives. But it's the backstory of Nate that I think is the most important. Nate got out of college and he got in this great startup opportunity. He was making more money than he had ever made in his entire life. And then he started to get inflicted by different vices.

He was drinking too much, he was gambling, he was doing drugs. And in order to pay for his habits, he started to steal money from the very startup that he helped to found. And it got so bad that he ended up getting kicked out of his own company. He was trying to escape his life.

He stole a vehicle and was on his way, two states away, didn't really have a destination on where to go, fell asleep at the wheel and was pulled over by the police, ended up spending six months in jail. And when I was interviewing him, and he was talking about how he rebuilt his life, he said something that was so profound. And here you have someone who has hit the most rock bottom

I could possibly think of. He goes, the greatest opportunity you have when you hit rock bottom is that you can build your life back brick by brick in the way that you want to. And that's exactly what he did. And so my favorite stories on the Passionist Rock podcast are stories of everyday heroes that any of us can relate to.

I find, I've had Gary V on the show and Gary is great, but it's hard at this point to picture yourself living his life. I think all of us could see ourselves making a bunch of bad mistakes like Nate did and hitting rock bottom. But to me, the beautiful aspect of his story, and it's actually one of the last stories I tell in the book to summarize the book, is how he rebuilt his life using the principles that I outlined in the book.

It's fabulous. Well, John, as I can say, from personal reasons, I'm thrilled that I met you. I'm thrilled that I read the book. I would never have continued on with Radio St. Pete, my passion project if it wasn't for you. And I want to thank all of you for coming. And so now I'm going to open the room to questions for John. Please share your name with us. Yes, please. Hi, I'm Marilyn. John and I worked together at Catalina Marquette.

Would you explain the cover of the book for everyone? Okay, so this is actually a funny story. So for those of you who haven't published a book, as an author, you think that you have a lot of liberties when it comes to the cover design. And what I found with my publisher was that wasn't the case. And the first versions of the book that were coming out, the cover had pictures of flowers on it, budding flowers.

There was another one that had an egg shell that broken open with footsteps that were going across the page. There was one that had lightning bolts and the one that they wanted to go with was a paper airplane on a yellow cover that was going up and going through the words passion struck.

And although they were interesting ideas, I didn't think it captured the book. So I went to my publisher and I said, none of those are gonna work for me. And they said, well then you're not gonna work for us. And I said, well, can I have one more try? And they said, you can have a try, but you have to pay for it with your own money

and come back to us with something, and then we'll decide whether we agree with it or not. So I went out and I hired four different design people, gave the spirit of the idea that I was trying to come up with, which is I wanted to show that at the start of someone's journey, there isn't a lot of passion. Oftentimes you're stuck and you don't know where to go in life. And that's what I wanted this blue area to resemble is,

but you just don't know where your life is going. And then you start taking some steps and as you do, it's activating more and more energy to the point that the more courage muscles you're exposing, the more intentional you are, it starts catching fire. And then it starts building and building upon each action that you're taking to the point that it eventually erupts into a passion struck life. And so that was the symbolism I was looking for. And this wasn't the first drawing that the gentleman did, but it was close enough that we were able to work on it and get it to this, and I'm happy to say

we've won a couple book cover contests, so I'm very happy about that, so thank you. Great question. Questions? Well, I'm going to actually ask a question. How many people in this room have a passion project that they have been thinking about and haven't yet started? Would anybody like to share that?

Holly, why don't I, Holly Hargett is here, one of my editors who wrote for me at Paradise News and has appeared on Radio CP. Holly, just share, I would just, I think that we should share a little bit because that's why we're here. But it's in school. Good, passion projects. I saw a hand here. Right.

Yes. Hi, I'm Carrie. You were speaking earlier, the pretty feeling. You were speaking earlier, I was being pretty feeling. You were yelling at you and yelling at you to do the thing that you're meant to do. And I... Mine? My birthday.

Get the way it happened. Thank you. I'm done. People in my life talk to me because they have things to share and I help them through it. I have help with mindset, mental health, so you get your own wellness,

and so it's sort of passion-minding. You count a mental health and wellness coach, while for you, the teaching artist here, taking a work-certified program to... Very good, very good. Very good. So now we'll share their passion project. One.

Two. Yes. At that moment it's like, you know, if you're a fireman, you care about your firetip, you're a man. During, you realize how much it was the homeless modulation you had here because, and you just wonder, you move here, why aren't there so many donors at St. Petersburg?

And you find out it's because of all the different services that he's had here for the whole month. So that's why people migrate to this area because we do have some different resources for them. Exactly. Omnivorous, bounteous, you know, that recipe for it, there would be friends. His friend, our friend, that's right, this and that.

But he just had all the money in the world. He just had this big boss and the odd bit on it. Nobody needs any money. This care for a population, and be able to provide healthcare that could serve in the area. People that died who want to go out and get care for themselves. The other side is I have a very large past about learning.

Word and aid, path and equal rights for people. Help women from mental health to physical health to nutrition, well-being, all of the things with the knowledge and resources. And just being here is an experience that I have. I just feel like I am definitely a good resource for these women. Honestly it's fighting the place where that is something to do. Because you know you just want to see your run. You can't do it without women for free.

But I do want to say, I want to introduce you to a new woman here. For those of you who have not gone to Tiny Buttons over on Central Avenue. This is it's brand new. They're working with they work with Casa. They work with Heels to Heels. Casa's amazing. Good. Thank you for sharing. Somebody else, somebody else. Questions for John or share your passion project? Yes.

Yes. Andrea. What is that about Fairbests not fairly fact the say's. Civil light and getting down, says the mayor of a lot to you, a ring that you sat in. He said, we haven't yet. No, it's well, but now I'm not. You think it's important.

What else do you offer in advance of bringing or hearing it in theaters? To take no one's being a weon. Good question. I think, Andrea, what I didn't do that I should have done more of is once I heard that calling, I kept putting it on the shelf and I kept procrastinating on it. And it wasn't until I really gave myself the time to really percolate my DNA, like what was going to...

I had to go back and relearn my strengths. I had been doing all these things in corporate America that really weren't exploiting my, I thought they were my core strengths, but they really weren't my core strengths. So it really came down to what could I do to fulfill the mission that I wanted to? And then I had to start thinking about it. Did I want to do it in a way that was one-on-one? Meaning did I want to make this a coaching business or you could be a counselor? And I thought if I did that I could impact this many people, but it would prohibit me from doing these creative things that I

wanted to do. So I had started to have to ask all these questions, but the first thing was what is my uniqueness and my ability to serve another human being? Because I think that's the starting point is, and I covered it in the Mosquito, in the Mission Angler chapter, but it's, I think we all have a uniqueness. And I'll tell you this story. I had this gentleman on the podcast.

I'm gonna bring, I can't think of his name right now. I've had 400 people on the podcast, so. But he is in charge of the Catholic University's business school, and earlier in his life, he was 16 or 17 years old, didn't, grew up in Sweden, didn't have a clue what he wanted to do, was really struggling, and his parents said, well, maybe you should consider replying to the Swiss Guard. He thought there's no way I'm ever going to become a Swiss Guard.

Not only did he become a Swiss Guard, eight months later, he was in the inner circle protecting Pope John Paul II. He said, the Pope, when you were around him, even though you think of him almost like a president where he's got all these obligations, he said, when you were in front of him, he made you feel like the rest of the world melted away. He was looking right into my soul and he knew I was lost. And he said at that point, you were put on here for a very specific reason. He goes, every single one is, and it's to fulfill this mission that only you can fulfill through the uniqueness that if you're a believer in God that God has given you and so it is your journey to exploit

that in the best way that you can to serve others because that's where you're gonna feel the most fulfillment in your life and to me that's a great example of it. John you also I want to address this because you wrote something about Angela Duckworth that I think speaks to this, and that's Britain's self-control and the psychology of perseverance. That is a big step, isn't it? Share with us a little bit about that.

It's interesting. I did a podcast interview with Angela, and if any of you don't know much about Angela Duckworth, she is one of the smartest human beings you could possibly interview. It's intimidating to interview her because she is so smart. You have to, she just puts you on your toes. So I was trying to get her to agree with me on my definition of intentionality, which

she would not do. But she rewarded it in her, so if people don't know her back story, Angela, before she became this author that she is now and the behavior scientist that she is, she graduated from college and spent the next years of her life teaching inner city schools, not really understanding what her purpose was, then was a consultant and figured out that she needed to go back and get her PhD. So I believe she's a Rhodes Scholar. She ended up becoming an author genius,

which is the highest award that they give for people in her profession. But what she came back to me with is when you think of intentionality, the behavioral science concept that she teaches is self-control. And what I read about in the book is when I was at the Naval Academy, I was there probably the worst time in the Academy's history, and I probably had the worst job that you could possibly have. So my class, I got elected to be the Vice Honor Chairman,

which normally is a job that you don't do very much in, because really what this job is about is holding midshipmen who are guilty of honor offenses up to a standard. And typically when I was there, the standard was black and white. If you found someone guilty guilty you were gonna dismiss them so the year was

going as I thought it would and We had maybe three or four of these honor boards my entire first semester but I get back from Christmas that time of year to find out that the academy had just experienced its largest cheating scandal in the history of the Naval Academy. And so I'm thrust into this situation where literally half

of the class underneath me had cheated on this exam. And the superintendent made, I thought, a calculated error when one of the people who had gotten this exam came forward. This person was rank number two in his class and said, I got this test. I'm coming forward to tell you that it came to me through many different sources, but I didn't realize it was going to be the exact test,

but I used it and I aced the exam. He got kicked out. And so after he got kicked out, every single person started to cover their butts about everything. And what ended up happening was it really showed me that through that example about self-control, we have the ability to control our actions. And those midshipmen had the choice

that they could use this gouge to get ahead or they could have pushed it to the side and taken another path. And I think that's what intentionality comes down to. Oftentimes, it's these decisions that we make. And to me, self-control is really realizing, if you're not on the path to becoming what you want or having the outcomes that you want in your life,

what do you need to do differently to change your path? Well, on that note, are there any other questions what do you need to do differently to change your path? Well, on that note, if there are there any other questions before we get busy signing books, I want to thank Book and Bottle, Andy and team. I want to thank all of you for coming. John Miles for this book, the excellent questions. And I hope that you'll tune into John at whatever you get your podcast

or on radiosthankpeete.com on Thursday nights. If you do pound John Miles, you'll hear his original interview. And I wanna thank you for the opportunity tonight to host with John on this terrific interview. Thank you, John. Thank you. Thank you.

Thank you. Wow, what an incredible experience sharing that live event with you. I hope you're leaving this episode feeling inspired and ready to take bold steps toward living with intention. It was a powerful conversation of book and bottle and I'm grateful to Nanette Weiser for helping me dive deep into the core ideas of Passion Struck. Whether you're familiar with the book or new to its concepts, I hope today's discussion gave you fresh insights into how you can apply these principles to your own life. Remember, one of the biggest takeaways from today's episode is that living intentionally is a daily commitment.

It's all about making choices that align with your purpose, even when the path isn't easy. The good news is that every small step you take brings you closer to the life that you want to build. If today's episode resonated with you, I'd love to hear your thoughts. Drop a review, let us know how you're applying these ideas, and don't forget to share this episode

with someone who could benefit from it. Your support means the world to us and it helps spread the message of intentional living to more people. You can find links to the event and everything we discussed today in the show notes at passionstruck.com. Be sure to check out our other resources, including the episode starter packs and my live intentionally newsletter, where each week I send out exclusive content, practical exercises, and more tools to help you live a purpose-driven life. Head over to passionstruck.com to subscribe. And before we wrap up, I want to remind you that beyond the podcast, I'm passionate about sharing these insights through speaking engagements.

I've had the privilege of working with some of the world's top companies and organizations, helping their teams unlock their potential and create real intentional change. If today's episode sparked something in you and you think these messages can inspire your company, organization, or next event, head over to JohnRMiles.com slash speaking for more details. And if you think I'd be a great fit for your next event, I'd appreciate it if you help spread the word. Your support makes a world of difference.

Now get ready for next week's episode because I'm sitting down with none other than Diego Perez, better known as Young Pueblo. We'll be diving deep into his profound insights on emotional healing, personal growth, and the power of self-awareness. You don't want to miss this episode. It's packed with wisdom that can help you on your journey of transformation. People sometimes get upset with giving kindness to a particular individual or a friend or a former partner, but then they don't receive that kindness back. I always think that karmically, you may not receive what you gave from that particular person, but it will come back to you in some manner. It may come back from another stranger in your future or someone else down the line, but the things that you

give will come back to you, but they may not come back from the same person. And as always, the theme for the show is simple. If you found value in today's episode, share it with someone who could benefit from it. And remember, do your best to apply what you hear on the show so that you can live what you listen. Until next time, live life, passion's rough. you