Pendejo Time - food song variety hour
Episode Date: October 26, 2023for the real day ones this goes out to you. Support the Show....
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Will you change my diaper?
Will you wipe my butt cheeks, please?
Will you... Hey.
Hello?
Hello. What do you want me to say?
That was my song I was working on.
But it was, you poop your diaper. Hello, what do you want me to say? That was my song I was working on.
But it was, you poop your diaper.
And that's all it was.
It wasn't anything else.
It wasn't any other type of joke.
Nope.
It wasn't anything silly. No, there was nothing comedic about it.
It was a beautiful song to a baby.
You poop your diaper.
You pee pee in your body pants.
You poop poo, pee, pee.
You poo, pee, pee, poo, poo, pee, pee.
Pee, pee.
Poo, poo, poo.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants. Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants.
Poop in your pants. Poop in your I can't do that voice for very long
because it hurts my vocal cords.
I don't know how Scott Stapp did that
for like 10 years straight.
Wipe me down.
I went pee-pee in my bed
and I'm stinky.
Hurt on here when I was here. Yeah, it's really fucking crazy.
You can do it for a while, but if you don't have a sip of water,
really, it does hurt to do.
I don't know how he maintained that for so long.
I remember when my mom told me they were a Christian band,
and at every concert in the early 2000s,
he had the tightest leather pants on and then a Weiss beater and was doing the gayest moves of all time.
And I was like, I mean, I guess they're Christian.
They're Christian in the same way that Led Zeppelin is the Lord of the Rings band.
Yeah, I guess it's like lore or like, know yeah i mean switchfoot was a christian band i
didn't know that uh they only had that one song uh meant to live which i guess in hindsight tracks
i was a badass rifter i need a mint or i can't live i haven't heard this song, but that's how I mentioned it. My breath is so bad, I need a mint to live.
I need a mint right now so I can live.
Stupid, dude.
How about instead of Switchfoot, it's bitch put my fucking bitch put my fucking
food in my lunchbox.
And it's to the lady
at the gas station.
Because she keeps taking
your lunch out of your lunchbox.
And you say,
bitch put my apple back in there,
you big headed bitch.
Why did she?
Because I give my lunchbox to her
because I can't keep it in my car.
It'd get too hot in there.
Okay.
And this bitch keeps taking an apple out and trying to take a bite out of it.
Anyway.
Interesting.
You know, I was listening to Creed for like an hour today.
And I think that's why I can't do a Creed voice now.
It's because I was doing it in the car for like an hour.
And I was going,
you poop,
you're a rapper.
Or I'll do,
I'll do, I like,
because it's similar for
fucking, what is it?
A lot of those guys
had a similar thing.
Pearl Jam.
Yeah.
Eating poop. had a similar thing like pearl jam yeah that's a signal eating poop off a plate with pee in a glass And he's stuffing his face with Pee
Poop is in my plate and I eat it and it's so damn yummy
Stained.
The stained guy.
What's the song that they sing?
Now that I've peed
All on my diaper
He has the same voice. The uh it's like the grunge voice
the post-grunge yeah uh i'm on i'm on the outside of my house pooping eating toast toast with jelly and orange juice.
Bow wow wow.
Oh she don't know
that I finished
off the eggs.
Bow wow wow.
Eating
toast.
And then I grabbed me a little
grape jelly.
Bow wow wow, wow.
It's overwhelming how stupid that is.
Like, it started to make my eyes.
It took so much concentration.
That freestyling took so much concentration.
Yeah.
I wish it didn't.
It does.
I'm sure, like, hey, let's go out and do karaoke tonight, guys.
Yeah, oh, they're doing, like, a grunge karaoke at this dive bar.
Oh, man, yeah.
Thomas, you want to come with us?
Yeah, but I got Pearl Jam.
I'm going to do all the Pearl Jam songs.
All right, that's fine.
I'll do the Nirvana songs.
Great.
Oh, he's doing Even Flow.
Okay, he's coming up to do Even Flow.
Everybody shut up.
Peas and toast with gravy british breakfast
but that's how the lyrics are coming up on the yeah yeah
yeah cheesy toast yummy bread grilled cheese for me.
Snacky please.
After school I like to make a grilled cheese.
It's so yummy.
Yummy.
You like that?
You like that, Jake?
Snacks are back.
I ate a snack. I ate a snack Snacks are back! I eat a snack.
I eat a snack in my lunch bag.
I eat a snack, too, with my juice.
Then my mom packed me for school.
Snacks in bag!
Bread and cheese and they're yum for me.
This is like so good. and they're yum for me. If you
got a lunch
and you want it bad,
you want to eat
sandwich.
If you got some
grapes and
cosmic brownie
and just a little chips.
You like that?
I eat food!
Yum!
I eat food!
Yum!
All the snacks are very good.
I eat it with my dad.
He's nice to me.
snacks are very good. I eat it with my dad.
He's nice to me.
Yeah.
Yeah.
This is like a team building thing they would have a special
egg class do. They're like, what songs
do your dad like to listen to?
Immigrant song.
What do you like to do?
I like to eat yogurt. Okay.
Make a song from your dad's favorite
song and then sing it to the class.
I eat
snacks. Yeah.
Hey, hey.
I like juice.
Hey, eat ice cream.
Like the way your food is
yummy and I am a dude.
Right now, now, now.
I'm handling it.
Yeah.
Standing next to the fountain.
I get my Coke and then I go to my car.
Let me think.
Oh, man.
Um.
She's buying some groceries.
And candy.
some groceries and candy.
I see a red door
and I want to eat a snack.
I eat Doritos
and they come in a red bag.
I eat the nacho cheese
it comes in a
blue bag
they are so yum
for me and cost
very little
snacks
I want to
the end is an exclamation
I'm eating
honey bunny plastic
rapid snack.
It's sweet and yummy, and for lunch I have to eat it fast.
I only get 20 minutes for lunch, so that's why I get my honey bun.
I buy a hot dog and I eat it in my car.
I love Swiss rolls.
I love Debbie cakes and hoo-hahs, baby.
I love honey buns.
Just enough time for my lunch break.
It's enough time for my lunch break.
It's tacos day.
Tacos day.
Tacos day. It's tacos day.
Tacos day.
Queso, yeah. Get me some tacos day. God damn it. taco's day queso yay
get me some taco's day
god damn it
jesus christ
oh my god
the man for whatever reason
fucking the Led Zeppelin one is still making me laugh
I like food.
Yeah.
So stupid, dude.
Oh, my God.
I can't.
Gravy, gravy, gravy, gravy.
Oh, fuck John Bonham.
That was a drummer.
Which one was the one that had sex with children?
That was you, I think.
No, don't even try.
No, I wasn't in Led Zeppelin.
You sick fuck.
Robert Plant, maybe?
Jimmy Page?
Because I'm Eating Cheese
Yummy
Food
Did I already do that one
I think
No we did
Back in Black
I think I did
I think I did
I think that was
Like the first one
I did was
Eating food
Or something
Can't believe
Can't believe
I did some of the
Same material over
Right
Wow
Wow Wow That's a new low Uh huh Can't believe I did some of the same material over. Right. Wow. Wow.
Wow, that's a new low.
Cheese.
Cheese.
Cheese. Cheese.
Cheese.
Cheese.
Oh my god man
Fuck
I wish you would hand me
That cheese wedge my friend
And we could
Yum yum yum yum yum
Would you put your snacks away with you?
Oh, my God.
Oh, fuck.
Man.
Could you put your snacks away with you?
Hand me that cheese wedge, my friend.
You could.
And we're all just eating nachos.
That's it.
It's all you get.
And I forget my cakes and snacks and food and chips for me.
Found it hard.
It's hard to chew on my
snacks. Mmm, it's good.
Hello. Munch on, munch
on food and
it is good.
He's completely abandoned
the melody. Snacks for
me and you, it's yum.
Oh my god.
Oh, fuck.
The cheese.
The cheese.
What song is that?
Barracuda.
Cheese.
Cheese.
They don't say anything in that part, but it's the note of the guitar I would say cheese.
Yeah, oh yeah, the harmonic part.
Yeah, yeah.
Eating some cheese with my friend.
And she's taking the drive-thru to Wendy's Jimmy I don't think that
lyrics gonna work
we want to do something you know like wizardy
and like spiritual
right right I was thinking like
maybe something along the lines of like
and she's
taking the drive-thru to Wendy's.
And she's taking the drive-thru to Wendy's.
It's like all dramatic.
Then they're like,
What the fuck did you just say?
She's had a long day.
She gets in the car.
She goes to Wendy's.
This song's called
Stairway to Heaven, man.
Right, sorry, sorry, sorry.
And she's taking the drive-thru
to Burger King.
Again, Jim,
you're kind of missing the point here.
Sorry, one more time.
Thank you for Taco Bell.
I was hungry.
Pleased to meet you.
Oh, no.
It's pleased to eat you.
Such a yummy snack.
Snack.
You can always eat what you want.
Oh, my God. Oh my god
I can't get no
Big Mac Burger
You like that?
We're like googling
Famous rock and roll songs
We're so fucking washed.
That's awesome.
It's not washed.
Here comes burger.
Here comes burger.
And I say,
it's with fries.
It's with fries.
Okay.
Hey, soup.
Don't cool down now.
Take a spoon and get yourself a bite.
Tomato and potato and beef, too.
It makes us two.
And it is wetter, wetter, wetter, wetter, wetter than regular food.
Oh, come on, baby, now.
Give me some food.
Twist and boost.
Twist and boost. Twist and boost. Twist and boost.
My stomach hurts.
Are you shaking the baby?
No.
There will be a burger.
Lettuce cheese. There will be a burger lettuce cheese
Lettuce cheese lettuce cheese lettuce cheese lettuce
There will be a burger lettuce cheese lettuce cheese there will be a burger lettuce cheese
like going up to
McDonald's and ordering like that
McDonald's can't be ordered
lettuce cheese
lettuce cheese
lettuce cheese
lettuce cheese
hey what
run that back by me one more time
a burger with sauce lettuce cheese
this is like fucking 900 bullets come to the side of your car
so stupid dude your car also the hardest i've laughed on an episode in a long time oh my god i'm trying to think of the best words right now.
Maybe recency bias, but twisted food and lettuce cheese are both pretty good.
I like twisted food for sure.
Because it takes balls to go with twisted food from twisted chow.
You have to make a big creative leap to do a lot of work there.
Oh, God damn it.
Oh, God.
Fuck.
Wow, that was a good 20 minutes.
Incredible.
Maybe we have more.
No, you didn't even hear that.
That was good.
Let's see.
Might as well munch.
Cheese. Go ahead.
Cheese on the burger.
There's lettuce and there's fries.
Okay, but it's the smoke on the water.
Okay.
Very good.
Oh, God damn it.
Is Taco Bell closed?
I must leave my...
Is Taco Bell closed?
The boys are back in food.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's fun when it all works out,
but when it's just food,
you just throw that in there somewhere.
The food...
The food are back in town. out the way it's just throw that in there somewhere the food makes the food
or back in town
food with friends makes his lunch on a hill in the early day Lexus food in his mouth.
Oh, my God.
Damn it.
Oh, my God.
What else do we got?
What else? S got? Ugh. What else?
Salsa that's mild.
Mild.
I took my grub and I ate it good.
Got a drink and it was pretty cold.
How does it feel
To be without a food Man, that sucks.
That's so bad.
To be without food.
That's up there with
twisted food.
It's, uh, goddammit.
Goddammit.
Okay.
Wow.
See, we did my whole march.
Ready to gnaw.
Ready to gnaw.
Let's see.
I think the last time we did this, I think we already did Breaking the Law, which was, I think, eating some lunch.
Yeah.
Let me see.
I think I might have one cooking here.
Yeah.
You know, I will say this is the hardest I've laughed in a long time.
Yeah, it's great.
It's probably a good sign.
All right.
Jesus Christ. it's great. Oh, it's probably a good sign. Ah,
Jesus Christ.
Let's wait.
All right.
Okay.
I'm ready for you.
I'm waiting on your,
on your go.
God,
it's going to be so good.
I'm definitely not even stalling
Because my idea definitely did not work
Let's see
How do we get back to this
Ready for lunch
Soup pie
Ready for lunch
You can tell by the way I go to lunch
That I'm very hungry when I eat my pies
Ready for candy
Ready for worms
And I'm ready for snacks.
And I eat with my friends.
Finished with my Crunchwrap because it tasted really good.
Finished with my Crunchwrap because it tasted good and it was very yum.
People think that I am hungry because I am eating all the time.
Can you feed me?
I'm having tasty food and some tasty snacks.
I'm having tasty food and some tasty snacks.
Make a lunch and I will eat.
Then you will smile and I will munch.
Hungriness I cannot feel.
And food to me is so unreal.
Can you feed me? Can you feed me? I just want to eat my food tonight.
Toast is on a vacation.
I'm with it.
I eat toast with my mother.
I'm just Googling like 1982.
Like the best songs.
Eating soup with my grandma, please.
She eats it cold because she's old.
Get out of here.
I don't mind you much in here.
And eating all my food.
Oh, I guess I was just eating.
Oh, no, wait.
I guess you're just what I eat it.
I needed something to eat.
I guess you're just what I eat it.
Yes.
More food.
More food.
Eat it in the kitchen. More food. And food. Eat it in the kitchen.
More food.
And snacks.
Yummy snacks.
I'm just a crunch wrap.
Nobody munch me.
He's just a crunch wrap from a Taco Bell.
They're increasingly getting more incoherent as time goes on.
Spare Emma's life from being my lunch.
Diablo sauce, yummy, yummy, yummy, yummy.
God damn it.
It's so bad.
This is so stupid, dude.
Well, the only thing we can really do is continue doing this for the rest of the year.
Yeah, what are we, 25 minutes in?
Yeah.
We're about halfway through.
That's okay.
This is what it sounds like when I eat food.
Yum, yum, yum, yum.
Last munch of lemon pie.
Eat it good, it's yummy time.
Yeah, yeah
Now you may say
Where did lemon pie fit into the rhyme scheme?
It's not important
It's just a food I thought of
That wasn't cheese or a crunch wrap
When french fries
I've become
Eating some yum
I've become eating some yum
Oh my god
Hello hello
Is there anybody hungry?
Is there anybody starving?
Are you looking for lunch? Is there anybody hungry? Is there anybody starving?
Are you looking for lunch?
Hello!
Making some pie with my friends we're using the oven.
Eating some lunch and some pie because that's what we do. I want to eat fish food all of the time.
Eating snacks and eating yogurt.
Hanging with my friend Thomas.
Yummy.
Yummy.
I think I just got gotta get back to basics
Twisting food
Lettuce and cheese
Lettuce and cheese
I'm gonna bite them off
A seven nation army couldn't eat my snack
Yeah I'm gonna eat it all oh now we're going to the mid-2000s
mid-2000s yeah we can and we'll all eat soup all right eat yummy with soup and bread it's good
i get knocked down but I eat lunch again Then never
God damn it
I don't know if I can keep doing this another half an hour
I guess I can just power through
You can do it forever if you want to Jake
We can do it
We can do it till our girlfriends leave us
I can just
I go outside after an hour and she's gone.
The apartment is empty.
Protein. Protein.
Protein. Protein.
Protein.
I love to eat
the food that has protein.
This isn't even
a show at all.
I mean, it is because people listen to it.
Oh, protein.
Protein.
Let's see.
Top songs.
Ben, eating some food and snacks, please.
They're very yummy.
Eating some food in my car.
Eating chicken.
Eating a rotisserie chicken from AGB before I go back to my job, which is I work in a
restaurant with my friend.
Do-do-loop-boop-do.
Another one bites of lunch.
Do-do-loop-boop-do.
Another one bites of lunch.
How do you like that one?
That's pretty good.
That's pretty good.
Or how about this one?
Instead of I want to break free, I want to eat cheese.
Won't somebody find me?
Yummy's too much.
That was good.
Thanks, buddy.
Super surprising you hit that note there.
I don't think it was close.
I think maybe I was about two hours off.
I'll take it.
That's okay.
Won't somebody find me?
That's pretty close.
Yeah.
Something to lunch.
Something to lunch.
Somebody to lunch.
to lunch.
Somebody to lunch.
And people say,
what genre will you pick next?
Maybe 20s blues.
What's food got to do with it? Alright.
Eating some cheese and I'm eating some burgers now.
A young fella eats lunch
in his house.
Thank you for letting me
eat my lunch
again.
God damn it.
God damn it.
Oh, man.
Thank you for letting me eat my lunch, it's pretty good.
Thank you for letting me eat my lunch.
Our lunch, it is what we like to eat, our lunch.
Very yum yum treats. Our lunch. It is what we like to eat. Our lunch.
Very yum yum treats.
Well, you can't tell by the way I eat my food.
I'm a yummy man.
No time for goop.
I literally just did that like ten minutes ago.
Well, that's fair.
She ate some snacks.
Yummy.
More than a sandwich. At the grocery store. She had yogurt cheese. More than a sandwich. The kind you find at the grocery store.
She had yogurt, cheese.
More than a sandwich.
More than a sandwich to me.
Oh, yeah, that's good.
That's good.
I can't do the, what's the verse?
Something about my lunch is good.
When I eat lunch and two
anyway I can't find it
top songs
1992
rock songs
let's see
of course all apologies, Nirvana.
Let's see.
Hey!
Wait, wait.
Ice cream, ice cream.
We know how to scoop it.
You like that?
Yeah.
I'll do anything for grub.
But I won't eat snacks.
That's not bad.
Mm-hmm. Mr. Food and me eating food with my friends. for grub, but I won't eat snacks. That's not bad.
Mr. Food and me eating food with my friends.
Mr. Bones Chicken.
They're not coming to me naturally anymore.
Ice cream is my muncher.
I'm just a boy
who likes to eat
a big treat.
And that
is not meat.
Mr. Food and Treats Brings me food and treats
Oh wait, let me
I'm gonna go
Hey, wait
My lunch is really late
Hey
Alright Alright Alright, let's hear it Hey Alright
Alright
Alright let's hear it
How about instead of
Hey 19
Hey Ice Cream
Okay
Alright
Hey Ice Cream
Oh please don't melt
Quiet
Let's see Hey, ice cream. Oh, please don't melt quite yet.
Let's see.
I wanted to test that one out on you to see how that would work.
Okay, yeah.
It was great.
It was awesome.
I'm glad I took the bullet for that one.
Glad I took the heat on that one.
Let's see.
Reel it in the years.
Are you eating all your snacks?
Are you drinking all the beers?
See, but then That's kind of what the song is about anyway
Basically
Right, yeah
So massive, yeah
Are you
Are you
Are you munching yummy?
Well, you know, we can, I don't know.
I don't want to do too many of the food things.
We don't want to wear that out.
We could do.
Are you eating all the poop?
Yeah, that's how it started.
Licking up all the pee?
Are you changing my diaper will you change mine for me are you being a big baby do you have your baby teeth yep are you little baby muncher
Running on your baby feet
This is sort of more like if Steely Dan
Were deranged criminals
This is my take on Steely Dan
This is like if Steely Dan was in a psychotic episode.
If Steely Dan had done several hours of podcasting.
Up next is my new song, Ricky Don't Lose That Suckler.
Just kidding.
Ricky don't lose that... You told me you had a Doobie Brothers parody called Black Daughter.
I don't know what...
I don't know what you were planning on that one.
But I figured I'd let you
do it.
Everybody!
Everybody!
Everybody!
What a fool believes!
That's just the song. Yeah. What a fool believes That's just the song.
Yeah.
What a good song.
That is a really great song.
I love that one.
What a scoop of cheese
For me
It's yummy
I have brothers
General facts about your life.
They are not gay.
Great.
That's awesome, man.
That is just true.
Thank you for coming to the audition for Landmine.
We're putting it back up on Broadway.
What will you be singing for us today?
I'll be singing
Well it's a bit
It's a bit of a classic
It's you know
Minute by minute
Michael McDonald
I'll be singing
Cheese it by cheese it
Oh cheese it
By cheese it By cheese it By cheese it by cheese it by cheese it
by cheese it I've been munching on
I've been munching
on
cheese it by cheese it
by cheese it by cheese it
I keep munching on
we do a little crooning
some little Frank Sinatra's
that's life that's knife
I use it to cut my steak in some of those little Frank Sinatra's That's Life. That's knife.
I use it to cut my steak.
Somewhere
where there is cheese
I'm there
wanting some please.
Start spreading the
jelly.
I'm eating today.
I want to be a great big bite of it.
Food.
Ain't that a lick on the spoon?
Yeah, that's pretty good.
Ain't that a lick of my spoon?
That's rice.
I'd like to try it.
One day you're eating rice.
The next you buy it.
And I know
I'm gonna boil
it soon.
And I'll make popcorn.
And I'll eat popcorn. And I'll
eat it with a spoon.
That's
rice.
That's rice.
It's what all the people eat.
It
can be spicy
or it can be sweet.
And I
know I'm gonna make it good
when I add some spice
and I add some food.
We're back.
We're back, baby.
We're so back.
It took us about 13 minutes
since twisting food and lettuce cheese,
but, man, I'm glad you stuck with us.
Hey, I knew we'd get back around to it.
You can't just let it die because it's been dead.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, you've got to really keep beating a horse until it's only dead for life.
Say, that's rice.
That's rice.
It belongs in a bowl of food.
And if you don't like it, you're not my kind of dude.
I've been a chef, a pirate, a cooker, an assistant chef, and I've made lots of meat. Ha ha ha.
Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha.
Ha ha ha.
Ha ha ha.
Ha ha ha.
Ha ha ha.
Ha ha ha.
Ha ha ha.
Oh, God damn it.
Ice cream on the spoon.
It tastes good. it is a treat yum yum yum dessert for a little boy like me to eat in other words eat the food. In other words,
please get sprinkles.
Although it's been said
many times, many ways,
here's some food
for you.
Very good.
Baking some meat.
Yes, sir.
Buck around.
Oh, wow.
Man, man, my stomach hurt.
Yeah, sometimes you need to.
Tall and tan and young and yummy.
The ice cream on my cone I'm munching.
And when I eat it each bite
I eat it go. Yum.
You like that? Ow! I eat
food.
Banana, banana.
Grab!
I eat food
I knew that I would now
And I think to myself
What a wonderful food
I see peas are green.
Red food too.
I like forks.
I love spurs.
And I think to myself
What a wonderful fool
And I think to myself
What a wonderful fool
That sounds so ugly in the cans.
It sounds so nasty.
Oh my god.
Wow. It sounds so nasty Oh my god Wow Why'd you have to go and make food
And put it on plates yeah
I can't do Avril Lavigne
Man What a wonderful food I can't do Avril Lavigne.
Man, man, what a wonderful food was awesome.
Wow.
It's very funny that, like, we try to deviate off course,
and then we get back to it by just throwing food in there.
Yeah.
I eat food, na-na-na-na-na-na-na, great. Twisting food, classic. What a wonderful food. Great.
Twisting food. Classic.
What a wonderful food. Incredible.
What a wonderful food.
And I eat to myself.
I can't believe it.
Hey, what did you do on Monday, man?
Oh, I talked to my friend on the computer.
And for about an hour, we just said twisting food to each other and laughed really hard.
And it was about the end of that.
Wow, man.
Oh, God.
Man.
Well, what a time.
What a time to be alive.
And you know what?
We've got 15 minutes.
I don't know.
I don't know.
You know, some people could say, wow, I can't believe you did that for 20. There is a food in New Orleans.
They call the guys Big Lunch.
It has been the ruin of many a poor boy.
And God God I know
it's lunch
my daddy
was
a sandwich
man
my mama
was
spaghetti My mama was spaghetti.
Oh, my God, dude.
You really sang that motherfucker
That was very believable
There was a lot of pain in that one
Well my lunch it makes impressions
On the inside of my stomach
On the good sip of my Sprite
My soda makes impressions When I sip a of my Sprite.
My soda makes impressions when I sip a good my Sprite.
There are little tiny bubbles when I drink the soda right.
Yeah, there we go fuck
if I knew my soda fizzes
that I would have came
fuck thirsty
god damn it I'm losing it
if I knew
you were a burger
then I wouldn't
have have you were a burger then I wouldn't have it have it back to the sip of such a soda
and it's cola and it's good eat the food and drink taste it like it's food till it like it's lunch till it starts to stink And then you cannot much.
Tell me that your love runs food.
I was waiting for it.
Tell me that your love runs food.
And I can always count on food.
To be there when the hunger strikes. I'll cook.
Be there when the hunger strikes.
I'll cook a nice burger just to feed you tonight. Oh, there we go.
Yeah, yeah, there we go.
Between the whispering food.
God damn it.
God.
Early in the morning when I eat my fries
Early in the morning when I eat my fries
Slice
When I wake up for my morning lunch And the sunlight hits my fries
This food is the greatest
Food I ever munched
Can't wait to eat food
It's my lunch
Grandma's food
Clap your church on Sunday morning.
You don't have to call me food.
You can grab your own plate.
Yep.
Yeah, I like that one.
Lunch only happens when you're hungry.
And he's hungry like the food.
Yeah, okay, that's good.
That's perfectly fine with me.
I have no problem with that at all.
And he's hungry for some food.
Say it loud. I'm's hungry for some food. Say it loud.
I'm black and I'm food.
Yes, sir.
Yes, sir.
Oh, man.
Wow, that's awesome.
Keep eating, eating, eating, eating food.
Eating, eating, eating, eating food.
I'm hungry now.
Yeah, okay.
I'll take that.
I'm hungry now
I need some lunch to go
And some fries you know
Grab a plate and knife
It's food
It's fun to eat at the food place.
It's good.
Burgers and the fries.
Yeah, I'll tell.
Yeah, okay.
Hey, kid.
Want to eat some cheddar?
Eat some cheddar on a burger that you got from the store.
Eat a crunchy burger and you'll have some food.
It is funny when you try to sell it.
Eat a crunchy burger
and have some lunch.
Oh my god.
Oh wow.
Man, that was some good stuff.
I can't leave food alone.
Oh, yeah.
You got me.
What a food could eat.
You should have said that.
What a food could eat.
Yeah, that's good.
Oh, man. What a food could eat Yeah that's good Oh man Just cheese
You have it with some butter
And maybe some toast
I'm the man
Who eats lunch
Eat it with my fork
Let's see here
Instead of Rich Girl by Hall & Oates
You're spaghetti
And you're on my fork
But you never never stay on my fork
You can try to stay on my fork
You can try to stay on my fork
But you're
It's hard to because you swirl right off
and you go right back on my plate so mine won't get you too far so sauce the sauce won't get you
too far that's all the sauce i won't get you too far back on my plate.
Man, that is something else, brother.
Because there ain't no eating snacks, girl.
Ain't no sandwich when she's gone food ain't no corn when she's away when she's a plate
let's see what are some good system of a down I don't know any
I can't
Why don't you eat the food
That is on your plate
Not great
We're thinking
We're cooking
You
Cook me all night food
That's all right.
Yeah, I think we're coming up on literally how much our brains are willing to let us do this.
We're coming right at an hour.
Legitimately, I try to come up with something else.
It's like I get a blue screen or like the turny rainbow wheel on a Mac.
Fried some ham for you.
It's good.
I'm trying to take different answers.
I want to munch you like a plate of food.
Okay.
I think if that had happened earlier,
it really would have taken it home.
I want to munch you like a plate of food.
It's very good.
Let's eat croutons Instead of let's get
Terrible pie
That's a pretty obscure Nine Inch Nails song
I don't think that's
No one's gonna get that one
Alright
Eating pie with me
Smells like
Smells like green beans.
Smells like green beans.
Yeah, I like that one.
Thanks, buddy.
It means a lot.
I can't stand it!
I want a sandwich!
I want a sandwich!
eat on a plate this food to make well eat some munchies and i have some fries so yummy and it's in my eyes i can't stand it i want a sandwich is pretty awesome
that got me pretty good.
Oh, man.
Wow.
Wow.
I want a lunch plate, some fries.
What's that one?
I want it that way.
Oh, okay.
Okay, nice.
All right.
Crunchy fries, big burger, and a large Sprite.
Crunchy fries, big burger, and a large Sprite.
Eat it right.
I want to eat it with my friends.
Burger and large fry.
Eat on cheese when you're hungry.
And you want some food.
We all need some food to eat on.
This is definitely something to think about.
This whole episode is really food for thought, no pun intended.
I'm honestly proud of us.
I don't know if anyone else will listen to this,
but this has been some of the hardest I've laughed in
almost three years of doing this show.
We did it for an hour.
When I saw it at the 15-minute mark,
dude, I was like, okay, this is
enough. Then we hit a stride with
Twist and Food.
Then I think you did
a finish
with my... That one was pretty good.
Then lettuce cheese, of course.
Can't forget it.
Yeah, in the morning, neither of us will remember ever doing this episode, I don't think.
Yeah, it will be like just a gray block in my mind.
Sunday morning, food is calling.
Eat some mustard, eat some cheese.
Thanks. Wait. some cheese. Thanks.
Wait.
Room 5.
You know Panama?
Yeah, yeah.
Of course I know Panama.
Eating lunch.
Eating lunch.
Yeah.
Cold slaw.
Cold slaw. Yeah.
Yeah, that's good too.
That's another good... Unchained is probably my favorite Van Halen song.
But that's not as popular.
We already did Might As Well Munch.
I'm sorry, Miss Jackson.
I need four meals.
Never meant to steal your French fries.
I apologize for stealing fries.
So I type a text to some food I like to eat.
So in that, I chose this piece of pie
that looked really neat.
I apologize if my lunch makes you frown.
No burger, no fry.
Very good, very good.
No burger, no fry. Very good, very good. No burger, no fry.
One food, one rice.
Wing stop, I'm eating.
In every single season.
Wing stop, I'm eating.
Yep. season Wingstop. I'm eating it.
Yep.
Yeah.
Oh, I have brown-eyed food.
Brown-eyed food.
God damn it.
Why is that that funny?
Oh, my brown-eyed fool.
Oh, I heard it through the grapefruit.
I love that one.
I've heard it through the grapefruit.
Do you remember when we used to eat?
Heard it through the grapefruit is an unsung gem.
That's a good one.
I heard it through a grapefruit as an unsung gem.
That's a good one.
At last, my food has come home.
Yep, okay.
Strange food.
Yeah, I like that.
Hang it.
And it's tasty, tree.
Food rules everything around me frame.
Okay.
Wait, wait, wait.
Tacos, eat them with the ground beef.
But then I don't know what that would stand for.
I don't drink water.
I eat good food Tom Ford
Tom Ford
Tom Food
Oh god damn it
I eat Cheez-Its
And she doesn't learn a lot from food
And I
Will always love food Yeah very good Did you get that one already Food. And I will always
love food.
Yeah, very good.
Did you get that one already?
Bound to eating some food.
Yum, yum, honey.
Not bad.
I'll take it.
I already did.
Hey, food.
That one already happened
Yeah yeah
That's okay
Let's see what else we got
I'm trying to think of more
Kanye classics
Kanye classics
I'm eating gum through my food
Damn it.
I got my foodies in Paris.
And we eating pancakies.
Let's see.
My favorite album is the College Dropout.
Let me see if I remember how many of these songs.
Oh, my favorite Kanye album.
That's my favorite album of all time.
Definitely.
Let's see.
Track list.
I don't remember.
Oh yeah.
When we eat our food.
Jesus walks.
New workout plan is good.
Okay.
Hmm.
You know what I think it's time for
You'll be eating pickle dill
You'll be eating lots of food
You'll be
Doing it for sure
What were you thinking
I was thinking maybe
Maybe we put a
We put our
Stamp on it
Really We both get one last one Maybe we put a stamp on it.
Really?
We both get one last one.
Okay.
Go ahead.
We're going to drink some Sprite.
Okay, that's actually pretty good.
Let me see here. uh... c here
if you had
one shot
uh...