Pints With Aquinas - An Interview with Fr. Donald Calloway

Episode Date: February 15, 2022

Hallow: https://hallow.com/mattfradd "No Turning Back" Fr. Calloway's conversion story: https://www.amazon.com/No-Turning-Back-Witness-Mercy/dp/1596142103?ref_=nav_custrec_signin& Fr.'s Dedication to... St. Joseph: https://www.amazon.com/Consecration-St-Joseph-Wonders-Spiritual/dp/1596144319/ref=pd_lpo_3?pd_rd_i=1596144319&psc=1 

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, welcome to Pints with Aquinas. Thank you so much for listening. If you like Pints with Aquinas and want to support us, you can do that in one of two ways by supporting us on Locals or Patreon. If you go to pintswithaquinas.com slash give it'll let you know there what you get in return. Thanks. Oh, we're live. All right.
Starting point is 00:00:18 So great to have you on the show. Thanks, man. Good to be with you. And I can't believe we've never met. I know. Just because we tend to run in circles, people who speak at different conferences. But it's probably my fault. I mean, technically I live in here.
Starting point is 00:00:26 I think it's your fault, yeah. But I'm hardly ever here, so. It's amazing that you live here. Yeah. Yeah. So do you have, because you always travel, so do you have a room and like your stuff, or you just have it all in a suitcase? Yeah, no, I have a room with all my stuff.
Starting point is 00:00:39 It's where I get my mail. I do my laundry. Yeah. So it's pretty, I got some great books in there. Like if I ever die on the road, somebody needs to go through my laundry. Yeah. So it's pretty, if you, I got some great books in there. Like if I ever die on the road, somebody needs to go through my room. I'm sure Scott Ham will do that. Yeah, he would.
Starting point is 00:00:52 Yeah, that's his library. Yeah, I, there was a time I was traveling nine days a month. That was my limit. I'd set myself, because I got a wife and kids. So it was like nine days a month, never on Sundays. Yeah. No more than two nights at a time.
Starting point is 00:01:01 So it ended up being three trips a month. But since COVID hit and the channel has taken off, I'm just kind of declining engagements, which is kind of been nice. That's cool. Especially because I don't want to get on a plane and wear mask. I was, I was actually looking up where to buy fake masks last night. Nice. Nice. Yeah. What was tough for me was because I travel tons, right? I mean, I think I could literally be the chaplain for American Airlines, you know, which would be pretty sweet. Last year, I grew a honking beard, right? Yeah, it looked great.
Starting point is 00:01:28 My curling beard, it was awesome, it was so big. But wearing a mask with that thing was, that was difficult, man. Like the breathing, the itchiness, and the whole thing, it was irritating. So, I was kinda glad I got rid of the big old beard. Not to mention the glasses. Like the only pleasure of flying for me
Starting point is 00:01:42 is I get to be in one place and read, but I can't do it because my stupid glasses fog up totally man And I'm constant I'm putting down over my nose, and then I get rebuked by the flight attendant I'm like what am I supposed to do here? I hear some are better than others I hear Southwest is pretty good. Yeah, I don't fly south with them I don't like the cattle car They just stand by you and watch you as you eat And say you need to put it up between each bite is this ever gonna end? I don't like the cattle car seating. They just stand by you and watch you as you eat and say, you need to put it up between each bite. Is this ever gonna end?
Starting point is 00:02:08 Do you think? Yeah, I know. I hope so. I think it's been extended to March, I think, at the moment. So we'll see what happens. Keep that charade up for a bit. That's insane. I heard, so I thought about, like,
Starting point is 00:02:18 what do you think of this? This might be pressing a little too far, but just to get people angry. The mask is to wokeism what the scapular is to Catholicism. It just seems like an identity thing that just shows you're part of the group. You see people wearing them in cars. That's good and bad,
Starting point is 00:02:31 because I'm never taking my scapular off, but I do want to take that mask off. And I hope they do too at some point. Hey, and also love the cassock. Thanks, man. I appreciate it. We got to praise priests who wear cassocks, because they just look so masculine and cool.
Starting point is 00:02:43 Bro, I love it. Like to me, it's battle attire. I've been called, what person am I in the matrix before? They're not familiar with it, they don't know where it is. Even had somebody call it a dress, and I was like, oh, that's not a dress, man. Battle attire. Battle attire, right?
Starting point is 00:03:02 The cool thing too is if you eat too much, it hides it, right? I need one of those. That helps out. Yeah. So you went to Franciscan. I did. What years?
Starting point is 00:03:11 So my religious community moved to Steubenville in 97. So I started in 97. And I transferred in, so I only went two years, got my undergrad in 99, then moved away, went to seminary, and then came back. I was actually the house superior of our house here for six years, which was awesome. I was, it was fantastic. And then after that is when all the invitations to speak and travel the world and all that came in. And now, I mean, I'm on the road constantly.
Starting point is 00:03:40 Well, I was telling you before that I actually don't know a great deal about you. And I said, what am I doing here? It's kind of like when people listen to Catholic podcasts, and points with Aquinas is kind of my life. I do this all the time, like, I haven't heard of that. I'm like, how can you not have heard of that? That's all I have to think about. How is this possible? And you've told this story a thousand times. So I don't want to make you have to tell it again, but you want to. No worries. Yeah, I'll give you the nutshell. I don't want to make you have to tell it again, but you want to? No worries.
Starting point is 00:04:03 Yeah, I'll give you the nutshell. I'll give you the nutshell. Wow. Okay, so, yeah, I wasn't raised in a Catholic Christian environment at all. Wasn't baptized. My parents were, you know, complete pagans. And it was a disaster for their marriage. They separated, got divorced, then my mother remarried.
Starting point is 00:04:20 That didn't work out. Got divorced, then she remarried a third time. My third dad was a nominal Christian, you know, in name only, he didn't practice or anything, but he adopted me, so I got his last name Calloway, which most people think I'm really good at golf. I'm not, I actually hate the game. But it's kind of cool when I fly through airports, they see my last name, they're like, Calloway?
Starting point is 00:04:40 I'm like, no. And he got me baptized. Well, his parents did, my new grandparents. So I was baptized in the Episcopalian Church when I was 10. Didn't mean anything, we never went to church, you know, that stuff. So he was a military officer, so we moved all the time.
Starting point is 00:04:55 Ended up in Japan, and I completely lost it over there. How old were you then? Ah, I think at that time I was 13. And we were living in California before that. Was that cool for a 13 year old boy to go like? No. It sucked. We were in California.
Starting point is 00:05:11 California was awesome, right? It was the 1980s where all the music was, all the girls. I was just like, I want to live here for the rest of my days. And then he said, we're moving to Japan. So it's not like you were in Ohio and they were like, you want to go to Japan. You were in California. Right. So I was like, I I'm not going but I had to. So I got there and
Starting point is 00:05:28 immediately got involved with the wrong crowd and eventually ran away from home on the big island of Honshu, the big island in Japan. And I got involved with the Yakuza. The Yakuza. No idea. Right. Kind of. The Japanese mafia. Right. Yeah. So serious stuff, man. Right. Um, they don't usually recruit like little white boys, but they use me as a drug mule to run drugs and money to get. I'm sorry. You have to slow down your story cause now I'm totally gripped. Bro, you don't know this. I know nothing. I promise. It's free on YouTube, bro. And now it is again. So, okay. How did you get involved with the Japanese mafia? And
Starting point is 00:06:06 Yeah, what that what that was 15? So well, I ran away and I wasn't gonna get gainful employment, right? I wasn't gonna look for a job So at that time if you were mid 1980s if you're a white boy with long hair and I was growing my hair long You were Bon Jovi man. I mean you were in the band Cinderella or rat or poison, right? I mean that was the 80s And so I stood out in Japan. So all these girls were hooking me up with things and they were like, if you want to get money, this is what you got to do. So I started running drugs for this criminal organization.
Starting point is 00:06:37 Nobody suspected that. In my backpack, a little white boy had the equivalent of like 10,000 US dollars on him and yen, which always like a million yen. It sounds awesome, but it's not a million dollars. I was living the life, man, but cause an international scene, right? That's not normal. We can't get away with that for long. So I got kicked out of the country, apprehended, thrown in jail, Japanese jail. How did you get caught? Well, I ran away from the jail, right? I went to use the restroom and bolted.
Starting point is 00:07:03 No, no, but how did you get caught? You were a drug mule for these people. When did you first get caught? So they tapped the phone lines because I was calling back to the military base where my friends were and I was like, dude, we got girls who want to meet American boys. I got wicked amounts of money.
Starting point is 00:07:17 I've got mopeds when we were stealing all this stuff. And they listened to the phone lines and apprehended me at a train station near Yokohama. And that was the first time I ran away from that as well. So, yeah, so eventually I couldn't get away. They literally handcuffed me, you know, not just to myself, but to a military police officer, an MP. That'll do it. Big dude, yeah.
Starting point is 00:07:39 Well. But here's the cool thing, Matt, is through all that insanity, which is, and trust me, this is the G-rated version. My mom had a huge crisis. She was going to counseling, she was on medication for depression, anxiety, all that stuff. None of it was working until a Filipino lady in Japan married to an American GI, right? Heavens all around the world. She said to my mom, you have to go talk to a Catholic priest.� And my mom was like, �Why? Why am I going
Starting point is 00:08:08 to do that?� But the Filipino woman, you know, if you know Filipino women, they�re like green berets in the spiritual life. They�ll take you down, right? They mean business. You better do what they say. So she was insistent with my mom. My mom was like, �Fine, shut up. You know, I�ll go.� She went and talked to a Catholic priest. I didn�t know any of this. That priest changed my mom's life Told my mom about the Eucharist about confession about the Saints all that stuff My mom is Italian Lachita Bianco is my mother's maiden name how she was not Catholic totally weird, but wasn't Somehow it was like when that priest told her about Catholicism. He was like he turned on Catholic like on you know in her
Starting point is 00:08:49 Italian DNA, you know, and she was like, this is amazing. I didn't know that. So, my mom had to leave the country before I was caught. That's how bad it was. They were still looking for me when my mom had to leave and find a place to relocate in the States. So, when I was apprehended, I was sent back to the US. They couldn't do anything like as far as like incarceration or charges because I hadn't done anything on American soil. So it was a tricky situation. So I went to my first rehab. How upset was your dad? Oh my gosh, totally. He never got promoted again in the military. He had to retire early. What was your relationship with him like? Back then it was horrible. Yeah, and then after this didn't help? No, not at all.
Starting point is 00:09:27 Now I love the guy. He's my Joseph, he's amazing. So you weren't just running drugs for people, you were doing them, drugs? Oh, big time, oh absolutely. Yeah, you pinch off your own stash, you know. So yeah, so I come back, I go to my first rehab, and that was in Pennsylvania, and it was a disaster.
Starting point is 00:09:44 I mean, I learned how to do more drugs in the rehab. But through all that, my mom became Catholic, my dad, my stepdad became Catholic, and my brother Matthew. I thought they had joined a cult. Literally, I thought they've Jim Jonesed it, man. They're going to go to Uganda, drink Kool-Aid and off themselves. I don't know what the Catholic Church is about, but they're weird I thought Catholicism is anti science anti woman Antiquated male dominated hierarchical institution that hates everything. It just has rules. That's what I thought
Starting point is 00:10:13 Mm-hmm And so I wanted nothing to do with it and that's when I couldn't even live with him because my mom so super religious That I was just I could not stand to be around her. So I ended up following a band called The Grateful Dead. And that's when my hair was like all the way down to my belt, right? Got a tattoo called, steal your face on my shoulder.
Starting point is 00:10:36 I don't even remember getting it. I woke up and my shoulder hurt and there it was. Doing acid and mushrooms and heroin and coke and smoking crack, going to all these dead shows, which I never even got into most of them, you know, and ended up in another rehab in Philadelphia. By your own choice? No, I OD'd on crack in the streets of Philadelphia, and they, you know, didn't know what to do. So they put me in this place, which was a rehab, but also a psychiatric unit. It's still there.
Starting point is 00:11:08 Charter Fairmont Institute, you can look it up. It's still there. I was there for six weeks and oh my gosh, it was a disaster. I didn't want to be there and the method was laughable. And I don't mean to make light of these things can work, right? And they can be beneficial. But it was a band-aid on a spiritual problem. It didn't offer anything more than just be, make a good showing of sobriety because somebody's putting the bill for this and we gotta act like we know what we're doing. So here's the Dixie Cup of meds, take it and cooperate with the program.
Starting point is 00:11:35 Oh man, you know. And I was forced to go there anyway, so I didn't want to be there. Did your parents force you to go? Yeah, and like the authorities, because they were like, if he doesn't do something, we can press charges for vagrancy or some other kind of stuff, and it was crazy.
Starting point is 00:11:50 Yeah, so when I got out of number two rehab, my parents are going to church every day. What? Yeah, I thought, you guys are nuts, who does this, right? It's bad enough that people go once a week, you're going every day. And they had enrolled my brother in a Catholic school, which in my mind, right, he was being beat up by a bunch of penguins. That's what I thought nuns were, right? Penguins,
Starting point is 00:12:12 you know, who just whip you with a roller across your face and tell you obey the commandments. And I'm like, y'all are crazy. Well, I continued to live my crazy life. And then I had what I call the divine two-by-four, rock bottom. And I've been there many times, but this was absolute rock bottom. I was even thinking about taking my own life, you know, just ending it all. Because I have some friends who did that. They're not here anymore. And as I'm passing through my parents' house on this occasion, thinking about ending my life, I picked up a book that my parents had on their bookshelf about Marian apparitions. No idea what this is, right? Clueless about this.
Starting point is 00:12:49 And I started to read this thing and I'm just like, what is this? Why haven't I heard of this? Right? Because I was into things like Sasquatch and Nessie. I was going to go to Scotland and drag that stinking beast out of that lake, right? Why can't nobody find this thing? I was into those specters and ghosts and stuff. So all of a sudden I'm like, what is this stuff?
Starting point is 00:13:08 Who's this Virgin Mary? And it blew me away, man. And most of my sins, my predominant fault, I would say would be lust, right? Most of the times I was drinking and smoking weed and all that was just to score girls and doing the crazy stuff just to score girls. So there's a saint who says, I think it might be St. Bernard of Clarivaux, somebody says,
Starting point is 00:13:29 the ways that a man sins are the ways that a man will be purified, right? So all of a sudden, I'm learning about this beautiful woman who's a virgin. I didn't know any virgins, right? And she's saying that she's the mother of Jesus, and she seems to be so beautiful, comes from a place called heaven. What is this stuff? What are these concepts? To me, the stairway to heaven was the same thing as the highway to hell. Neither one of them were real, but you sing about it, everybody talks about it. So, all of a sudden, it's being presented as though it's real? And I'm like, what is this stuff?
Starting point is 00:14:09 And all I knew was that this woman seemed to be so ravishingly beautiful, and I didn't feel like I wanted to do anything foul with her. It was a kind of beauty I've never encountered before, and it was getting to my manhood, right? So, long story short, man, the next day I went and talked to a Catholic priest and my life began to radically change, man. I mean, look, this is what I look like. Yeah, you can just hold it up to that camera. You know, and I'm not a narcissist, by the way, but I do carry a big picture of myself
Starting point is 00:14:37 around the world. If I pulled out a pocket-sized one at conferences, nobody would be able to see it. So, that was me when I was 17, right? And when I'm having this experience, by the way, I was 21. So my hair was longer than it's shown here. So I go to the Catholic priest. I'm so fascinated by the story. I know you keep saying you're going to give me the short version, but if you don't mind, I'd love to kind of just open it up just a little bit. So you go to your parents' house, they go on a daily mass. Your brother, Matthew, is he participating in the faith at this point? Yeah, yeah. He's in Catholic school as well.
Starting point is 00:15:06 You take this book off the shelf. Your parents home, are they seeing you read this book? This is the amazing thing. No, my dad's on an aircraft carrier halfway out around the world, wherever he was out at the time. He had to get out of the military early because of me, but he still had one more deployment to do. Mom is there, but she's asleep, it's at night.
Starting point is 00:15:27 In the morning, she's coming down the steps, here I am long here at the bottom of the steps. And I'm like, mom, I could even say it. And I was trying to formulate that I wanted to talk to a Catholic priest. And she's like, you know what she says to me, we joke about this to this day. She looks at me and she goes, yeah, right.
Starting point is 00:15:45 Right? She thought I was trying to like pull a manipulative, you know, thing on her. I'm like, no, I'm like, what the heck is this? Is this what you got? Who's this Virgin Mary stuff? What is going on here? And she ran to the phone, punched in seven digits,
Starting point is 00:15:57 like 6 a.m. man. And they were on a military installation in Norfolk, Virginia, Navy base. And she's trying to set up a meeting between me and some dude named father and I don't know what that is and it doesn't work she tries another one doesn't work so I of my own volition knew right inside the main gate was one of those things right a Catholic chapel so I said mom there's way in there one she looks at me she goes run Donnie run
Starting point is 00:16:21 right I did I threw the book down the hallway a tiedied, you could have got a contact high off of me if you stood close enough. I mean, I was constantly baked. So I run across that military base, totally out of wind when I got there, and the name of it, I'd never stopped long enough to see the name of this thing, and it's still there to this day,
Starting point is 00:16:38 Our Lady of Victory Chapel. How perfect, right? But I don't do church, I'm like, I'm not going in there. It's good enough I'm near one of these things. There's traffic. I think this can't be public. So, I see another building that says chaplain's office. So, I go over there.
Starting point is 00:16:51 Seriously, it's like 6.15 in the morning. I walk in, long-haired freak in the doorway, and I yell out, Catholic priest, right? I freaked that joint out. Heads are popping out of cubicles, and's looking at me like what part of the fence did this hippie jump, you know, who's this bizarre looking creature? I don't look like I belong on a military installation. So I'm like, hello, I see you. So finally some dude comes over to me, white Navy uniform on, he's like, can I help you?
Starting point is 00:17:18 I'm like, I need a priest. And he's like, who are you? I'm like, don't worry about it. So then he goes in. Unimportant. Yeah, don't worry. So he comes back with another guy and he says, I'm Father John. I don't, that means nothing to me. So he's like, can I help you? I'm like, I need a priest. And he goes, I'm Father John.
Starting point is 00:17:34 Yeah. I'm like, I don't know what that is. Because in my mind, I'm thinking you should look like Moses or something, right? If we're going to do religion, you know, I don't, what do you guys look like? So he says he's one and then I go, dude, I got to confess. So he's excited. So we go to Hiskulókubikó, but he's scared. I can see it. And he like pulls his chair like a little bit out of the hallway. And you're not a Catholic?
Starting point is 00:17:56 No, but he doesn't know that, right? And I didn't know there's, you had to be one to do this. But you knew about confession. How did you know about that? In the book, it's, it talked about if you want peace, you got to go to confession. You got to get a Catholic. That's why I went to the church and everything, right?
Starting point is 00:18:09 So, dude, I start telling this guy stuff, foul, disgusting, perverse things that I've done since childhood, and I'm so ashamed, I can't even look at him. I'm looking at the carpet, and I'm going so fast, and I don't hear nothing, so I look up and he's like, you did what? I'm like, yeah. He's like, hold on. And that's when it got real. He goes, when's the last time you went to confession?
Starting point is 00:18:34 And I'm like, dude, I don't know. And he goes, high school? Has it been a long time? And I'm like, he goes, okay, well, you're a Catholic, right? And I'm like, oh, heck no. Dude, he got so mad. He was like, yeah, he was like, you have to be a Catholic. I'm like, I don't know. Why is he getting mad at you? Well, I think he just assumed that I was a Catholic, right?
Starting point is 00:18:54 I'm sure he did, but you're just pouring out your heart to this point. Right, right, right. Yeah, totally. But I kind of understood. So I'm like, dude, I don't know. So he goes, all right, hold on, what's up? And I'm like, dude, I read this book, freaking me out, bro. There's a virgin. She says she's the mother of Jesus. You know about this, right? And
Starting point is 00:19:09 he's looking at me like, oh, Lord, where you come from? So he's like, look, I got a busy day. I need to go celebrate mass. Dude, to me, you're going to go rejoice in gravity, neutrons, and protons. You're going to celebrate mass. I don't know the lingo. So I'm looking at him like a deer in headlights and he goes, you don't know what that is? And I'm like, so he goes, all right, do you know where the chapel is? I said, uh-huh, I saw it.
Starting point is 00:19:34 And he goes, go over there. I'm gonna go be over in a little bit and do some stuff. And then we'll meet back here after. And I'm like, really? Cause I'm thinking, I just told that dude sinful things, but also criminal things. I'm thinking that's his way of getting me out.
Starting point is 00:19:45 He's going to be like, 911, yo, get over here quick, you know. So I'm like, don't bust me, man. And he goes, no, no, no, we're good. So he goes, as I start to leave to go to the chapel, he actually says this, this is hilarious, but I totally understand. He goes, hey, do me a favor. When you go in, sit in the back, okay? Right? Dude, I look like a total freak, right?
Starting point is 00:20:06 So, I'm like, yeah, I get it, man. So, I go over there, I open the door, the door slams behind me, and I turn around, who's in that church? Only five people right near the front door, in the front pew, five Filipino women, right? I'm dead meat, man. One took down my family. I got like an army up in here. You couldn't get me to the back fast enough, right? I went to that back, sat down, and all of a sudden, if you're familiar with Filipino culture, which I am, I've been once.
Starting point is 00:20:36 Yeah, yeah, okay, it's amazing. I remember having cold fish for breakfast. They drive like maniacs, and they were the most hospitable people I've ever met. They're amazing people. They're amazing people, They're amazing people. But it's a very matriarchal culture, right? The women dominate and they just tell everybody else
Starting point is 00:20:49 what to do, you got to do, got to do. And the men are like, fine. So there, sure enough, was this little Filipino unit with a leader and she went up to this thing that looked like a table, fired up two candles, came back and she pulled a necklace out of her purse and she starts with this Tagalog incantation to this mystical boat hanging from the ceiling. It's a naval chapel so there's a boat, a ship hanging from the ceiling. So I'm like
Starting point is 00:21:14 what is it? I'm in the back. All I hear and no offense to any Filipinos who are listening or watching, I salamat po to you and your people, I love you people, right? But this is what white boy in the back heard Hey, I'm gonna get a better gonna get a better gonna get a better. It was like Unintelligible gibberish. I'm like what the yeah the other four reciprocated with holy meta gonna better gonna get a comment, right? I can make out a hail something a holy something. Amen. Yeah in the between. I don't know what they're saying then this woman Turns around to freak white boy in the back Holds her necklace up, right? And jingles it. And she yells to me across the pew.
Starting point is 00:21:48 She goes, young man, young man, would you like to pray the next decade, please? Next decade, right? Dude. Accent, damn. Dude, I dropped out of high school, right? I wasn't intelligent at the time, but I knew a decade meant 10 years, you know? So I'm looking at this woman like, you're freak man like what I don't know what to say So she tried to clarify she goes it's a second side of homie study second side of homie study
Starting point is 00:22:12 I'm like I thought I walked into like a Wiccan coven and they were doing some weird stuff over the same church You know, so they she seemed disappointed in me and they turned around they kept doing this thing It was like sold to the highest bidder because they were flying. He had better get a better hold, he better get sold. Crazy stuff. Then they stopped, the dude comes in, but now he doesn't look like a military officer. He's dressed like a hippie. Seriously, with like a flower on his little robe
Starting point is 00:22:38 and he's like, morning, to the women. And I'm like, what the? And he goes up to something and he's saying stuff, but it was Charlie Brown. You ever been to the Catholic church where they need to get the bunny microphone, get some batteries in the mic? It was in the name, Mary.
Starting point is 00:22:50 What? Right? I couldn't understand him. Now I can't, he's white. I can't even understand him. And it was bizarre, man. So I'm thinking about bailing. I'm like, I'm out of here.
Starting point is 00:22:59 Yeah, this is crazy. But I'm like, all right, he said we'll talk. So all of a sudden, now I'm not Padre Pio, I'm not a mystic, I've never had anything like this happen since. That dude went up to that table, it was the altar of course, bent over, there on their knees, he picks up a little white circle, about that big, and he says with total focus and the microphone there worked, thank God, and he said this man, take this, all of you, and eat of it.
Starting point is 00:23:24 This is my body. And he held it up like he was showcasing it. Dude, I'm in the back and I'm thinking, you're a mad man, bro. He just told us that that's his body and we got to eat it. That's what I heard. And he was like, da-da, like showcasing it. And I'm like, what? And it was like he stood there for a long time. And it's as though somebody came in and pressed pause in the room, and then I heard a voice. And this is what I mean by I'm not a mystic or anything. And it wasn't spoken to my ear, it was spoken to me. And the voice said to me, worship.
Starting point is 00:23:55 And then, Matt, I had what I can only call like an infusion of knowledge. I knew what that man had in his hands was God. I didn't know lingo, I didn't know blessed sacrament, holy communion, none of that. Then he came back, or no, he remained there. He picked up what I thought was a really sweet-looking medieval goblet, right? I had no idea what this was. And he said, take this, all of you, and drink from it.
Starting point is 00:24:15 This is my blood. And he held it up. I heard the same voice, worship, and I knew that God was there. Then that dude got up, came down, the women they met in the middle, and I saw that man say to each one of those women one by one, ìThe body of Christ.î He didnít say ìmy body.î What the voice told me was true.
Starting point is 00:24:36 It is Jesus Christ, right? Then I saw him put God inside them. They put out their tongue and I saw him place God on their tongue. Matt, do you know how many things I put on my tongue that look just like that? Liquid Lucy we call it, a little acid trip, exactly like that, right? So many dead shows I went to searching for meaning where love never fades away and all that, and I'm watching this and I'm like, there's no way. There's no way that everything that I've been searching for in my life for meaning is here in a Catholic church.
Starting point is 00:25:07 No way. He did the same thing with the chalice, right? They drank from it. I saw this. Do you know how many chalices I drank from? Tons, right? Take a sip, pass it around to your family and the dead, right? Insane.
Starting point is 00:25:18 So, I'm like, what, what? Then he did something, he left, they left, and there I am alone with God in a box with a red light next to it, because he seemed to have God still there. I didn't know the terminology, so I'm speaking as though I'm living there. So I'm like, okay. I am so freaked out by this that I get up from the back pew, I walk behind me, and I hit the wall. There's a curtain with a sign and it says confession.
Starting point is 00:25:46 Infusion, didn't hear a voice, but I knew what that was. Cause I've been to the hospital a ton of times. I get kidney stones like every five years I'm begging for death, you know, nuts. I've broken bones and shattered this, you know, and everything. So I've been to the hospital a lot. Every time in a hospital, you go behind a curtain
Starting point is 00:26:00 and your life is saved, right? I knew this is a church more than a church. This is God's rehab. This is God's hospital. I knew it. I went to that priest's office. I told him what happened. Dude, he was happy, but he wasn't exactly delighted because I told him I heard a voice and he's like, yay! I'm like, dude, I'm serious. I'm not having an acid trip. I know what those are like. I heard a voice, bro. You made God. He's like, what are you talking about? I'm like, dude, I'm serious. I'm not having an acid trip. I know what those are like. I heard a voice, bro. You made God. He's like, what are you talking about?
Starting point is 00:26:27 I'm like, the white thing, dude. And then he gave it to them and he's like, yes, that's, and I'm like, bro, I'm freaking out here. So he didn't exactly know what to do. He gave me a picture of Jesus, a painting of Jesus, a crucifix, which I still have to this day. Wow. That was a long time ago now, like 30 years,
Starting point is 00:26:46 and a portrait, this is hilarious, a portrait of his grandpa. That's weird. Random, right? You know, you can keep that, and these two are great. Totally, part of me wanted to say that, but I'm like, I better shut up and just do what he says, right?
Starting point is 00:26:59 But it was a pudgy looking dude who had a little white hat on, looking like he- Oh, stop it. No, seriously, and it looked like he'd eaten one too many cookies, you know, he was a little chubby looking. Oh, stop it. No, seriously. And it looked like he'd eaten one too many cookies. You know, he was a little chubby looking fellow. So I'm like, whatever. So I go back to my mom's house.
Starting point is 00:27:10 I tear down Bob Marley. I threw away every Mrs. January, February, March issue, hitting under the floorboards. All my resin scrapers get that one last hit. Chucked everything. I hung up Jesus, Jesus, and Grandpa in the room. And for those at home, Grandpa was who? John Paul II. Right. Right. I didn't get grandpa was who? John Paul II. Right.
Starting point is 00:27:25 I didn't get that until you said it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, yeah, so, and then I'm like, now what? Right, he told me to come back tomorrow. I could royally jack this thing up with one phone call. What did your mom say when you came back doing this? She observed the whole, to this day, she testifies to the whole thing of what happened.
Starting point is 00:27:39 I come back with these items. I threw everything in the room into like five big black hefty bags, not even into the trash, out the front door, just into the yard, instinctively hung these things up, and then I'm thinking, what do I do? So, I'm like, I think I need to pray, right? So, I had hung that portrait painting of Jesus up above the dresser where I used to have a big old Bob Marley thing smoking a big old spliff, right? So, now's Jesus. I get on my knees and I'm like, I need you. I think you're real and I want you. Dude, what happened next? I can only call like
Starting point is 00:28:17 divine detox and romance. God flooded my soul with so much mercy because I was actually in shock that the image was like this, with the heart on fire. I thought He would be looking at me like, you freak little pervert, I'm going to slap you into an eternity, a lake of fire, you sick little, right? But He wasn't. And if you're God, you know everything about me, so you know all the horrible things I've done with myself, with others.
Starting point is 00:28:42 And I lost it, man. I started crying like a human being can't cry. I had so much liquid coming out of my face, it was pouring off my chin, right? And that lasted all day. I got back to the house, it wasn't even eight o'clock, I don't think. My mom testifies to this.
Starting point is 00:28:55 I was in that room all day. When I finally came to my senses, so to speak, it was a totally mystical experience. I got up and I laid down in the love seat because there wasn't even a bed for me there. I wasn't there enough to have a bedroom. It was a storage closet with a love seat in it. I laid down and tucked into it and then this happened. Now, I pray this never happens to me again.
Starting point is 00:29:21 I say this being a priest 19 years now. The devil came, right? I didn't believe in the devil until that point. A creature came into the room and started to manifest itself, like literally take on a physical form. Matt, I was so terrified that I couldn't even move. And if anybody's ever had like sleep paralysis, right, I have that occasionally. It's a terrifying experience, but this magnified by a quadrillion. This was a living creature
Starting point is 00:29:51 that wanted me. What did it look like? It was fuzzy. It wasn't like it was clear. And it's not like I'm seeing you. It was just a presence that started to like looking through a glass type of thing, that marble glass, whatever you call it. But it was there and it was starting to get clearer. I was so terrified I had to close my eyes. I was absolutely petrified and I couldn't do anything. Man, I wasn't a Satanist.
Starting point is 00:30:14 I didn't go to like some seance around a pentagram and slash a chicken's throat and sprinkle blood. No way. I never – but I had dabbled in like Ouija boards, not because I even believed in it. I was the one moving it, you know, trying to get the girl like date him, you know, I never, but I had dabbled in like Ouija boards, not because I even believed in it. I was the one moving it, you know, trying to get the girl like date him, you know, I'm spelling it out. Like, yeah, you know, stupid stuff, right?
Starting point is 00:30:31 But tarot cards and all that kind of stuff and just stupid stuff. But the devil, I think thought that I belonged to him, right? As the song say, running with the devil, you know, all the songs I used to rock out on. And I was so terrified because I'm like, what am I gonna do? Can I punch the devil, you know, all the songs I used to rock out on. And I was so terrified because I'm like, what am I going to do? Can I punch the devil? Right. Am I going to take a swing at the devil?
Starting point is 00:30:50 That's not going to work. And I couldn't because I was so paralyzed with fear. I did the only thing I knew how to do from my soul. I screamed out, not audibly, in my soul, Mary. You know what happened? Annihilated. The devil was completely obliterated, man. And I experienced the most amazing peace that I've never experienced to this day
Starting point is 00:31:10 and probably will not this side of eternity. And then I heard a voice, a woman's voice. Again, I'm no mystic, it hasn't happened since. The most pure, feminine, motherly voice spoken to me, not to my ear, and it was like trickling over me and it said this, Donnie, I'm so happy. Nobody calls me Donnie but my mom. Nobody.
Starting point is 00:31:34 Who is it? It's not my mom. My mom's in the house somewhere doing whatever. It was just one I never knew. It's the mother of Jesus Christ, right? By telling me that, she's telling me she's my mom. I went to sleep that night, so safe and secure, like the devil couldn't touch me because I was in the arms of Mary.
Starting point is 00:31:52 The next day, I go to the Catholic priest and I told him, sign me up. Sign me up, homie, right? What do we got to do here? And he goes, that's not how it works. I'm like, what do you mean it's not how it works? He goes, you got to go to classes once a week for like six months at least. I'm like, what do you mean it's not how it works? He goes, you gotta go to classes once a week for like six months at least. I'm like, what? He said, there's no short program.
Starting point is 00:32:08 I'm like, fine, when are they? He's like, Tuesdays. I'm like, great, put me down. It began. The next day I went, got my hair cut, lost all my power. Why did you do that? Why did you cut your hair? I knew I had to change.
Starting point is 00:32:22 The rehabs are right when they say you have to change people, places, and things. They get that right, for sure. The cords that I couldn't cut in the past, God came in and our lady and just said, yeah, that'll be enough. Snip, cut, done. All my friends, I became a dork.
Starting point is 00:32:38 I was no longer a chick magnet, so to speak. The girls weren't attracting me. I lost my hair back in those days, long hair. You were a cool dude, right? Yep. I lost it, man. Nobody wanted girls weren't attracting me. I lost my hair back in those days, long hair. You're a cool dude, right? Yep. I lost it, man. Nobody wanted to hang out with me. What I couldn't do, God did.
Starting point is 00:32:50 And everything changed. I got a job, right? I mean, I changed my language. I started going to, dude, I would be at church in the mornings before the Filipinos. That's pretty intense. For a white boy, yeah. I mean, I was so in love that at the end of the day,
Starting point is 00:33:04 after my, I would go to love that at the end of the day, after my, I would go to daily mass for my lunch break. I wouldn't receive communion because I wasn't Catholic. At the end of the day, I would go to the Catholic chapel to watch them close the doors. Right? When you're young, you know, when you got this young romance, you know, no, you hang up. No, you hang up. I couldn't get enough of Jesus. I'd be looking through the window. I'll see you tomorrow. I was madly in love, dude. I don't want to get into my story, and I don't know how much of it you know, but that was me too.
Starting point is 00:33:30 I was 17 years old, conversion to Christ. I would skip class, go sit in the chapel, and I was just in love. And I looked weird, like people in love look. Right, totally. Yeah, and it was just so freeing, because I was going through that divine detox in God's rehab, which is the Catholic Church. And then when I did become Catholic, oh my goodness, right? I mean, the graces that were being given, the medication was free, the best meds ever,
Starting point is 00:33:56 the best counseling psychotherapy possible in the sacraments and teachings of the Church, the wisdom of the saints. I entered into fasting, which I was doing before I became Catholic in that phase, prayer squared, right? The ability to transform your life, God to transform your life through prayer and fasting. Holy moly. Was it like such an infusion of grace
Starting point is 00:34:16 that you found it easy to avoid those former sins during that period of time? Yeah, during that time. I call it the honeymoon phase. Yeah, that was true of me too. It was almost like I didn't, I wasn't aware that I was even being tempted. That wasn't even a thing. That's right. After it was.
Starting point is 00:34:31 That's right. Yeah. Exactly, yeah. The honeymoon's over and now it's on to the commitment and sacrifice. The slog. Yeah. Golly. What was your mom and dad and brother like during this phase? Ah.
Starting point is 00:34:40 Was she thinking that this was maybe a phase or that? My mom didn't, but my dad did, because remember, he was on an aircraft carrier and he was out for like a six-month deployment. So she's writing him letters saying, honey, you're not going to believe what's happened to Donnie. And he was writing back like, I don't. And then when he came back and when I became Catholic, because my baptism had been valid as an Episcopalian church when I was 10.
Starting point is 00:35:05 So I was just confirmed and everything, First Holy Communion. I mean, we all were crying. It was just, yeah, it was amazing. Did you make any friends your age during this time? I did, yeah. And that was interesting because they were Filipino and one of them was a Filipino girl that I was like super attracted to because I'm like, oh man, she's like the dream wife. You know, she's beautiful. She wants to have babies. You know, she's super Catholic. She wants to cook for me.
Starting point is 00:35:29 Everything, you know, except balut. I don't do balut, that little chicken egg thing. I don't know what that is. I like my eggs chicken cooked, you know. Okay. So that was like a little, I wouldn't call it a distraction because nobody had bad intentions or anything,
Starting point is 00:35:42 but she ended up becoming a nun. So it was kind of funny. So, but yeah, I got some good friends. Yeah. Golly, it's amazing. My mom was meeting with my Bishop because she thought I was brainwashed after World Youth Day Rome.
Starting point is 00:35:58 That's where I went. That's where I had that experience. Isn't that nuts? I think she was more concerned before I was like dressed all in black. I write these like suicide poems, hanging up my wall just to just a cry for attention It was nothing that serious. I don't think but wow in this funny. I try cuz we're about 10 years different, right? I'm 38. I'm 49. Yeah. Yeah
Starting point is 00:36:16 Helly man. Yeah, gee, isn't that crazy that I didn't know any of that story. Yeah, where you been man? Dude, I'm nobody man. Trust me I mean, I don't know why you ever nobody, man, trust me. I mean, I don't know why. Do you ever feel a lot of pressure to be super holy because you have that? Because you know what's, I hope you don't take this the wrong way, but you hear of priests who've had these profound pasts and they fall off the wagon at the height of their career. I shouldn't say career, their apostolate. And God bless them. I mean, any of us are just as susceptible to that.
Starting point is 00:36:45 It's just that we're not on a pedestal. What's that been like for you? It has not been easy. I can say that for sure. Because the pressure is definitely there and I'm still human. I'm not having to cross the finish line yet, right? Do I get tempted? Totally, right?
Starting point is 00:37:02 All that stuff. I live in a very material world and I still struggle with all kinds of stuff. Thank God for confession, right? So yeah, that's a terrifying thing for me because that one passage in Scripture, those who are given much, much is expected. I'm like, dang it! I'm like, I've been given a lot, Lord. I think what helps me a lot is being in a religious community, right?
Starting point is 00:37:25 Although I do travel a lot, I'm very connected to the community, so I'm not just like going rogue and doing my own thing. That is really important, because that's where you can get real dangerous, right? When you're just off and doing your own thing completely. And then also, just the whole like, with the social media stuff that we have today, like, I got a Facebook thing and I post stuff on St. Joseph every day so people can kind of keep in touch. I respond to people as much as I can. It's hard.
Starting point is 00:37:54 Private messages and things like that. So I'm not like some elusive hidden secret thing, you know? It's like everything is out there for everybody to see. Now the first few years of my priesthood were the toughest. How so? Because I didn't know how to manage all that. You know what I mean? When people are inviting me to everything, to speak, to do this, massive amounts of food
Starting point is 00:38:17 being pushed in front of me, and I'm like, sure, right? I gained weight, my prayer life suffered, everything, my sleep, all that. And then about five years into my priesthood, I said, you know what? If I have to upset people and their culture and say, look, I love you people, but I can't eat all this. I need to be back and done by 9 p.m. I need to pray, I need to sleep. They understand, right?
Starting point is 00:38:42 And once I got that under control now, it's like a smooth, cool machine. Yeah. So, you know, Christopher West, I was talking to him about traveling and speaking and he said, like, it cannot not screw you up. Just having any amount of fame, which is a gross word to have to use in the church. But you know what I mean? You're on a stage, there's lights, people. He said, it cannot not screw you up.
Starting point is 00:39:04 Right. Yeah, it's just, people are... He said, it cannot not screw you up. I just... Yeah. It's just true, isn't it? I think he's right. I mean, that's where you have to stay grounded. Yeah, how do you do that? Because people who aren't grounded probably don't know they're not grounded.
Starting point is 00:39:14 So how do we know that we're grounded? Yeah, I mean... Other people in your life, I guess, if you listen to them. Oh yeah, well, that's the one thing about my religious community. The guys know me, right? Nobody knew me for like 10 years. I wasn't on the speaking circuit. Well, that's the one thing about my religious community. The guys know me, right? Nobody knew me for like 10 years.
Starting point is 00:39:27 I wasn't on the speaking circuit. Remember I dropped out of high school. So my formation, I had to get regular college, then seminary, and I lived with all these brothers. They know me. They know my idiosyncrasies, my oddities and all that. So when I come home, I'm nobody to them. I'm no rock star to them and that's good.
Starting point is 00:39:45 And I hang out with them. We watch Doctor Who. We just, you know, whatever, stuff like that. Then there's also, I know my own personal stuff. Like, do I want to be a saint? I do, totally, right? But definitely a work in progress. I mean, I'm a stupid sinner, man. I go to confession a lot. I make a lot of mistakes. So I know, like in a stupid sinner, man. I go to confession a lot. I make a lot of
Starting point is 00:40:05 mistakes. So I know, like, in the Filipino culture, for example, maybe you're familiar with this, it's so funny. When they want a priest to bless them, they literally grab your hand and push it to their forehead. It's how they get a priest to bless. You don't do this so much. They touch your hand because your hands are holy to them, right? Beautiful. Yeah. But I remember one time somebody saw that at a conference. The Filipino lady grabbed my hand as they off knew and just put it to her forehead.
Starting point is 00:40:32 The lady comes up to me, a white lady, and she goes, �Look at you! How arrogant! You think you�re some king or something, you know, these are your servants.� And I�m like, �Huh?� And she�s like, �Look what you did.� And I�m like, �I didn�t do that.� I said, �That�s their culture.� And she was like, �No what you did.� And I'm like, �I didn't do that.� I said, �That's their culture.� And she was like, �No, you're one of those priests.� And I'm like, �I didn't do a thing.� So, sometimes you take a lot of criticism and people can be pretty rough because they'll come up to you. Like, imagine this, Matt.
Starting point is 00:40:57 Like you're married. Imagine if I came up to you and said, �I know that almost half of marriages end in divorce, so don't jack it up. I'm really rooting for you. I'm going to pray for you. It's really hard when people come up to me as a priest and say, you know, I know so-and-so really messed it up. Don't become like him, you know. Yeah. It's not encouraging.
Starting point is 00:41:14 Yeah, you know what's encouraging is I get a good friend who actually, well, I don't think he'll mind me saying, you know, Mark, I'm going to say it in my American accent, Mark Hart. Yeah, yeah, yeah, of course. The Bible guy. Be Bible geek. Well, I love Mark. He's such a lovely guy. He texted a priest friend
Starting point is 00:41:31 who is popular, you know, online and said, I just want you to know, like, if you ever find yourself like with a whore doing crack off her back or something, he probably didn't use those words, but he's like, you can always call me and I would love you. And the guy wrote back and said, he was, he was in tears, you know, but like that's the kind of love we've got to show our priests. Yeah. I've started doing that just to freak people out. Like my fellow priests, I just want you to know, like, if you ever hook up with a Sheila, you know,
Starting point is 00:41:58 you just, you abandon the priesthood, like you could come to me and you could say in our guest room and I would love you. Right. Right. Right. Cause I know that I'm disgusting and I don't have any doubts that you were also disgusting with the grace of God. But I mean the priest and you, and you, you know, so it's, yeah, this idea that there are like super priests or super evangelists who are somehow significantly different in their nature is a lie. Yeah, I'm not a guru and I, you know, unfortunately with social media they call it having fans.
Starting point is 00:42:27 I hate that. I don't have fans, I have friends, right? But people will come up to me and they'll say, Father, I'm a fan. I've been a big fan for years and I try to change it. You're a friend, right? I'm not a guru, man. I'm not, I mean, I want to bring you to Jesus, not about me. Yeah, I'm your father.
Starting point is 00:42:44 Yeah, exactly. So, and yeah, it can be hard when the spotlight is on you and people have seen your videos or read your books and then you come into a place and they want your autograph and all that kind of stuff. Yeah, it can be hard not to go to your head, but at the end of the day, I put my pants on just like everybody else does, right? I'm trying to cross that finish line
Starting point is 00:43:04 just like everybody else is. And so. trying to cross that finish line just like everybody else is and so I remember Scott Hahn giving a talk in Canada and people were around him asking for autographs and Somebody said like can you sign my shirt or something? Yeah, and and he declined and but he did it in such a charitable way He said maybe there's something more appropriate. I could sign something like that But nice because it makes sense like if someone comes up to you or Scott or somebody is like can you sign you like no, this is not about me That's just offensive. Totally. Yeah, absolutely. Yeah, you don't want to do it like that. Yeah, no father would do that, right? So yeah, um, the funny one is like photographs because I'm not terribly big like into the photograph thing But certain cultures are like Filipinos. Oh, yeah. Oh my goodness, right? I love how much we've talked about Filipinos
Starting point is 00:43:45 But wow, they love their pictures, you know, and you never get one. It's always one more fodder. It just once one sees it doing you got a line of 200, you know, Have you ever spoken to the Philippines? Oh, many times. They must love you there. It's a riot. Yeah. Oh yeah. Last time I was there, I was there for a month and lost like seven pounds because I sweat like crazy, right? But they don't keep schedules, right? So when I got there, they had no itinerary set. Okay. And they're like, we'll figure it out.
Starting point is 00:44:13 Yeah. And they're like, father, we're going to go to, you're going to speak at this university. Then we're going to speak to the police academy. Then this parish like, and then, you know, in one day and I was there for a month. So bless you. How am I going to keep this pace up? This is insanity. Like trains, boats and automobiles.
Starting point is 00:44:27 We were going to every place and lost seven pounds, got sick. And then when I left, I was like, see you next time. I'm like, it's gonna be a while. The last time I was there, the most insightful thing anybody has ever said about me came from a Filipino woman driving me and Sarah Swafford back to the airport. And it's kind of offensive, but it's really insightful.
Starting point is 00:44:51 She's like, Matt, you are like, and forgive the accent, you are like a phone with many apps, very exciting, but dies quickly. And it's exactly true. Like I told my wife, she's like, yes, that is you. Wow. Honest. Oh, it's so true. I turned told my wife. She's like, yes, that is you Wow Honest I took oh, it's so true. I turned into a zombie after much like I get really excited. Let's do it Yeah, yeah, I can keep that up for an hour and then I'm gonna go home So I'm always doing the Irish goodbye at parties. Yeah, I like that too. Actually believe it or not
Starting point is 00:45:18 I don't know. Maybe I'm an introvert. I think I am yeah Yeah I can be by myself in a car with somebody for a seven hour drive and say nothing, totally at peace. And yet they think something's wrong. Like I'm mad. I'm like, no, I'm good. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:32 So MIC, this is the order you joined right from the get-go. So I don't think I ever really heard of them until I started seeing some of the books you and other priests are putting out. How did you first encounter them? Oh, this is hilarious. So, I didn't know what to do with my discernment, right? So, I just knew I loved Our Lady. She brought me to Jesus. So, I'm like, well, dastas and priests, cool, but I don't know. I just think I want to be like super Marian. So, there was this book,
Starting point is 00:45:59 I think it still is around. You can send in postcards to religious communities. You look a stamp, you know, and you get information back. So I sent in so many, got stacks of information back. So all I was like, I was overwhelmed. I said, all right, I love Our Lady. Anyone that's got Mary's name in the title, right? Tons of those. So I was like, that didn't help much.
Starting point is 00:46:19 So I said, all right, let's see what else. So I looked at one and it said this, the technical name now, the congregation of Marian fathers of the Immaculate Conception of the Most Blessed Virgin Mary three times. So I was like, cha-ching, right? That's the one, baby. I didn't know nothing about them.
Starting point is 00:46:34 Thank God they weren't some liberal cray-cray. This is them. Yeah, that's the one. Did you see how little I know? You really don't know much. I really showed it in zero work before my interviews. You're a priest, wow! Wow, yeah, you're not kidding, man.
Starting point is 00:46:47 Wow, that's very Marian, okay. Yeah, so I went, I visited them and they were awesome. I was like, these guys love our lady and they spread divine mercy. I'm like the poster child for divine mercy, right? So they somewhat reluctantly said, yeah, with my past, they were like, if we do accept you, it's gonna be a very long formation. And it was 10 years it took me. But I needed that.
Starting point is 00:47:08 I definitely needed it. So, yeah, God provided complete providence for that because, unfortunately, I mean, there are a lot of communities that are very left, very crazy with what they're pushing. I would have never made it in one of those. So, thanks be to God. Yeah, especially maybe it feels like it's less so, does it? Does it? What, does it? Liberal kind of religious communities than maybe back in the 80s and 90s. No, no, not my experience. Yeah. Sadly.
Starting point is 00:47:38 Well, maybe to put it a different way, I don't know many Catholics are being drawn to religious orders that are left leaning. That is true. Yeah. Thanks be to God. They're all kind of dying out. I was really attracted to the Friars of the Renewal. I saw a picture of a friar in a World Youth Day Canada book.
Starting point is 00:47:54 Yeah. And I'm like, he just looks so cool. I know. Totally. And I just wanted to join them. Yeah. And there were so many Franciscan communities that it took me a while to find them, but I went and stayed with them and stuff like that.
Starting point is 00:48:04 But I remember a Capuchin saying to me once, and it was really helpful advice, he said, don't be afraid if you feel you're being drawn to a religious community for superficial reasons. He's like, the reason people are drawn to women is usually for superficial reasons, but you want that to develop. That really helped me because I was afraid. I just want to look cool. I want to grow a beard and wear that thing.
Starting point is 00:48:24 But I thought that was great advice. Yeah, that's brilliant advice actually. I mean if I could join another religious community CFRs are awesome. I love them right like straight out of Lord of the Rings stuff, you know, the look love that look But the my favorite habit of all habits is the Dominican habit. Is it right when they're decked out with that? Yeah, the black. Yeah, man. I mean, it's like, the Inquisition is on baby. Yeah. I mean, this looks awesome. You know, where's your horse and spear? You know, it's just awesome. Yeah. Um, but it's a superficial thing, but it's awesome. Yeah. And it's called to do something deeper. So. Yeah, I like that.
Starting point is 00:48:55 So I just kind of throw that out there for those listening who, who might even be afraid to acknowledge that the reason they're finding themselves drawn to religious orders for those superficial reasons, because it feels kind of superficial, But yeah, to let that develop. All right. Yeah, man. Am I see. So 10 years. Is that tough? Very tough. Was it tough because of your past in addition to why it's tough already? Yeah, it was tough on every level. I mean, it was academically tough, right? Because I, I wasn't used to that. Um, but then it was also, I had to socially mature, right? I thank God I didn't go out and start evangelizing right away because I would have been like,
Starting point is 00:49:28 this is the catechism, it'll set you free and you will like it, right? I didn't have a very good method. I remember I did have a few, when I would go home to visit my family during the breaks, like some people, you know, hometown hero, you know, one of our own is seminary now, let's have them speak to the prayer group, right? So I would do that and sometimes I'd be at a different church than my parents went to and the Tabernacle wouldn't be in the sanctuary, it'd be like down the hallway. I'd get ticked and rightly so and I'd be like, what's wrong with you people? You know, I'd just go off on the parish. I'd be like, you know, this is his house, not our house. And I'd be like, I'd want to like pick it up and carry it over there and they're like no no you can't do that and I'm like you know for his house has
Starting point is 00:50:07 consumed me totally right and I would be telling people like how many of you practice contraception right and people you look like you do do you do you look like one of those dude totally like I did not yeah it's beautiful you should be like that right right with love and compassion though, I was pretty reckless at some point. Yeah, gosh. Yeah, I was like that too, absolutely. And then I served with net ministries, you have to have net. They always give this big talk before you go home about how not to be an arrogant, self-righteous so-and-so. Don't go home and be like, we are going to pray a decade of the rosary before we eat, that kind of thing, you know? Because you're just so on fire.
Starting point is 00:50:43 It's hard not to be. Absolutely. And for me, it was the glory days, like, um, the pontificate of John Paul II. It just the whole, it did feel like the glory days, didn't it? It did bro. And I was just like, ah, it was so awesome, but I needed to mature. I needed to, to, to learn a lot of tact and delivery, you know? So. Golly. Yeah, man. I, Carl Keating said, and I keep coming back to this quote, is like, we used to go to Rome to clarify the confusion of our parishes. Now it feels like we go to our parishes to clarify the confusion coming out of Rome.
Starting point is 00:51:15 It's been tough. Very tough. It's been tough. We're living in crazy times. I had no idea this was coming. The kind of stuff that we're going through right now. Do you think anyone is still denying that it's crazy in the church? Because it felt like the first few things that happened with our Holy Father. I, along with everybody else, just became an apologist for every single thing our Holy Father did. Because we love the papacy.
Starting point is 00:51:34 We love him. Yeah. And we love him, too. But then and then when you like, oh, that seems weird. And then you get a lot of criticism for that. Is there anyone still being like, no, things are exactly fine? Pete Liesveld Yeah, maybe there are, but I think a lot of them just want to deny what they're seeing because it's too, it's pressing on the mind when you know what Jesus said, the gates of hell will never prevail against it, and we know this, right? This is the truth. And yet, we do live in such a confusing time where a lot of craziness is going on in the hierarchy,
Starting point is 00:52:05 in the leadership. Because I know a lot of brother priests out there in the trenches, in the parishes, and I've said to them like, man, how do you do it? Like, when people come up to you in your parish and they say, can we get married on the beach? And they're like, no. But the Pope married somebody on a plane and they're like, oh, okay. Still no. Right, still no. Or this and so, and they basically say, look, I just try and tend my own little garden here with my little flock and be really a father to them. And you do have to sometimes pull away from all the flood of outside stuff
Starting point is 00:52:39 because it can really, the negativity and everything can really eat you up. You don't want to deny it, it's there. Yeah. But I don't know. You don't want to deny it. It's there. Yeah. But I don't know. You don't want to dwell on it. You can't dwell on it, man. So yeah, so if there are people that are denying it or unaware of it, I think sometimes it's just because they're like, look, that's the battle over there or something. I just need to tend to my thing right here at the moment, you know, so.
Starting point is 00:52:59 The way it's appeared to me is, all right, society, we knew this has been going to hell on the handbasket for a while, but at least we had the church. That's what it felt like. You know, we're not that different in age and we had John Paul and Benedict and it felt like, yes, this is the rock. This is where I find my gravity and my foothold. Everything else can be going on around me, but this is safe. So when this no longer felt safe, there was nowhere to go.
Starting point is 00:53:21 And that's a terrifying place to be. Well said. Yeah. And it makes it difficult to defend because, I mean, now I have recovered a lot of my friendships from my past life. They find me on social media or whatever, and that's usually a trip, let me tell you. I bet. And they're like, hey, I've been searching or I'm asking things, but what's happening with your Pope or with this? And I'm like, ugh. And then I got to like retrieve the tradition and say, well, before this Pope, you know,
Starting point is 00:53:52 okay, never said he was God or perfect or anything, you know, he's a man. And then you got to walk real delicately because you don't want to be, you know, saying, yeah, you know, totally sucks, you know, can't wait for the next one. You have to be really pastoral and really with great love and try and say, okay, we do have a situation, but we got this 2,000 year history. Jesus is really with us and we're going through a tough time at the moment. What do you see in the church is happening? That's great right now.
Starting point is 00:54:28 Oh man. Don't ask me that I'm only let ask you that. Yeah. No, I do know this great stuff happening. I see it. There is, there is. Um, but what's funny is the things that I would point to are like a return to tradition and that's being squashed.
Starting point is 00:54:43 Nevermind. That's what I was going to say, right? So, yeah, but you won't squash it. We're like weeds. It's not good luck. It won't happen. Beauty wins. Tradition wins.
Starting point is 00:54:53 Absolutely. Absolutely. It will win. It's young people. I remember staying with this priest up in Canada. This is during Benedict's pontificate. And he said, how sad that Pope Benedict is so out of touch with young people thinking they're into Latin and I'm like, no you don't get it that's what's sad.
Starting point is 00:55:10 Young people are just drawn to it. Oh it's impressive to me like at a lot of my events that I'm at there'll be some young people and oh my goodness I can see like they're so, they want to be modest, they want to be pious, the way they conduct themselves, it's just, it's awesome to me. Now, it's not huge groups, it's usually pockets, but I'm like, you guys give me so much hope as a priest, because this is, to me, I mean, it shows me it's good to see the fruit every now and then, right? It's hard to go for a long period of time and not see the fruit of what you're doing. So, when I see those kind of things, it brings joy and delight to my heart because I'm like,
Starting point is 00:55:48 praise God. And I think I've been thinking about this lately that I'll get a couple of thoughts. I want to run and see what you think. I think this the awkwardness that we sense in the trads is inevitable when you're trying to reclaim a tradition that wasn't given to you. Right. So like I grew up in a church where hockey sticks were brought to the altar during offertory, because we offer everything to God or some such, you know, where I played Metallica at mass. Oh, wow.
Starting point is 00:56:16 And like shame on those who let me, like kind of shame on me, but I wasn't a Christian. So like shame on those who let me. Right. So it's like when it's been taken from you and you want to reclaim it, it's a weird thing. The best analogy I can come up with is it would be like going to an antique store and buying an ancient armoire and deciding that this will be a family heirloom because your parents got rid of everything. Right. There's an awkwardness to that. You're going to naturally be on the defensive a little as the modernist stuff kind of comes in.
Starting point is 00:56:45 You're kind of like a Quebec, the Quebec in Canada, who have to be like violent about using French, not violent, I don't mean that, but like you have to be intense about using French. Otherwise you'll be overwhelmed with English. Right, right. So in a sense, when people say like those traditionalists are a little sort of uptight, I'm like, well, what do you expect? They feel like they're under attack.
Starting point is 00:57:03 I would be too, if I felt that way. And I probably am like that. Right. Yeah. And for me, what you you expect? They feel like they're under attack. I would be too if I felt that way, and I probably am like that. Right, yeah, and for me, now what you're saying there is so well said. Like, in my formation, I had a very good formation. Great, for my religious community, it was fantastic. And the seminary I went to was fantastic. The Dominican House of Studies in Washington, D.C.
Starting point is 00:57:20 Great. Thomism, the whole stuff. Yeah. The one thing for me that I feel that I wish I had been formed in and known was the traditional Latin Mass. That wasn't part of my formation. So it's an interesting thing though, that now when it seems to be being attacked or being really ridiculed or minimized or done away with, you're surprised, right? I have a desire to learn it.
Starting point is 00:57:46 It's a great way. It was almost like the worst thing that could have been done. If you were surprised, don't look over there. But I, ah! Exactly, and I'm not alone in that. Tons of my brother priests are seeing the exact same thing. And it's not because we're cray cray and we're just like, no, the novus ordo is bad
Starting point is 00:58:00 and everything in here is recent is bad. That's not true, right? But I'm just like, like you said, that wasn't part of my heritage going through formation. Not because my formators didn't want it to be. It's just not how it was done. Right. But now I'm like, gosh, I kind of, I kind of felt like I missed out. Yeah, me too. You know, and yeah, so. Yeah. Yeah. How do we continue to talk about that? What's tough is to talk about it is seen by some as an implicit attack on the Holy Father or those. Right. And it's a difficult balance because I don't want to fall into that.
Starting point is 00:58:33 Right, neither do I. So maybe it's about just like focusing on the beauty. Like Scott Hahn says, he says, I'm a glad trad. We have beautiful Latin mass here at St. Pete's. It's getting better. We're looking to get like a full-time person there for the choir and it's happening slowly, but that's where people are in and they're happy in there.
Starting point is 00:58:50 Yeah. Well, you know what's interesting too, so I'm the vocation director for my religious community and praise God, we're getting a ton of vocations. Thanks be to God. What I have to say is I travel around, man, if there's a desire to suppress tradition and the traditional at mass, good luck, because the young guys, they're really into it.
Starting point is 00:59:10 Really. And they're not weirdos, man. They just want piety. They want the great love that's expressed in those externals that shows forth. And I get that. I totally understand that. And that's one reason why I do wear a cassock. I love the cassock. No, I don't wear it all the time, but I love this thing, right? And it helps me
Starting point is 00:59:32 to realize who I am as a priest, right? I am not going to be flirting with women if I'm wearing this thing. It's just not going to happen. You know what I mean? It protects me. So, and vice versa, too, although I have known some who seem to actually be attracted to it. So you know, you gotta be careful with that. That's why you never want to use deodorant either. So you want to smell and wear it. I'm a big fan of deodorant though, so I don't know.
Starting point is 00:59:54 I'll grow that monster beard and look weird, you know, but some people are attracted to that too. You can't win. To the win situation. Actually, it's funny. When I was an undergrad at Franciscan, you know, the ratio of girls to guys at the school back then probably still the same. I think it's the same, yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:08 Right? And I was like, man, I'm never gonna make it through here with all these girls who are like ideal looking girls and wanna be Catholic family. So I'm like, I know what I'll do. I grew up nasty, I didn't tame it at all. It was like going this way and everywhere. I thought, yeah, this is good.
Starting point is 01:00:21 And then it became a hipster thing to do and you were cool again. It's like, yeah. So is good. And then it became a hipster thing to do, and you were cool again. It's like, yeah. So anyway, so the young people, I mean, they're really attracted to those traditions. And I think that's awesome myself, right? Because the ones that I've encountered, they're not oddities.
Starting point is 01:00:38 They're not weirdos. And they're the people that I see as the hope of the Catholic families. They want to have kids. They want to retreat. I'm thinking that those in the hierarchy who would seek to dismiss traditionalists as fringe people, they sound like Trudeau dismissing the truckers. Like, dude, no, you can't do it anymore.
Starting point is 01:00:59 We're not going to believe you. It doesn't work either. It's not working, is it? It's not working. I hope it doesn't. Right. So, yeah. Huh.
Starting point is 01:01:06 So a lot of, and so, now what do you do now though, if you want to help teach these people who are coming into your order the Latin Mass? Is that not allowed anymore or? Yeah, well, yeah, we're definitely not against it. It just hasn't been the norm for us to do. So we do have guys who do say the Mass, but for us, like, it's not gonna be the norm of what we do.
Starting point is 01:01:24 So it's not going to be the norm of what we do. Yeah. So it's a little tricky. But a lot of the guys that tend to be really like that's what they want to do predominantly, because even the guys who say that they love it, they prefer it, they're not like saying that they're never going to say the Novus Ordo, they're totally against it. Most of them actually, that's been what they've gone to in their parish. But because they, most of them, I have to say probably three-fourths of the men who are discerning these days, my experience has been they've had a conversion of sorts. They went to
Starting point is 01:01:53 college or Catholic college and lost the faith or dabbled in Buddhism or whatever, you know. And now they've got it, and I mean got it, like they're madly in love with Jesus, and they want to get those traditions back. But they're not poo-pooing everything that's recent, but they just want to recover that. So a lot of them are going to FSSP, right? Mille Christi, they're going to, you know, those kind of groups. Institute of Christ the King. Correct, right? So, praise God.
Starting point is 01:02:18 And I tell them, great! Wonderful, that's fine. Yeah. But if you wanted to implement that as training, is that even allowed anymore? It wouldn't be my decision solely. It's really just me. I don't just come in and say, you know, this is what we're doing. Not like back when you're in seminary, move the tabernacle. Yeah, right. Exactly. No, that's got to go through the formators and everything, you know, and so. There's a fellow from, I think, I want to say around Kamloops, who was just visiting here.
Starting point is 01:02:41 Yeah. And he celebrated the Latin Mass for the first time at Pete's here. Okay, right. Yeah, sure. Father Jonathan. Sure. Yeah, that's right. But what's crazy is my wife used to be with Net Ministries and they ran a, they started up a youth ministry there and he was one of their core members. Oh, wow. So my wife and him go way back. Oh, how about that? But it is really interesting to see people like myself and others who were very much drawn to the more sort of charismatic movies in the church, which praise God, I love charismatic people. And I have my days where I can charismatic get up with the best of them. But there is this like even those people
Starting point is 01:03:16 are just being drawn. I mean, it's true. It is true. And I like I'm graduated from Franciscan, right? And I went it was very charismatic, right? We'd be fopping it up, you know, at the festivals of praise. And I love that stuff. Outside of the context of the liturgy, I love that kind of stuff, like going in there and just praising the Lord, man. And those Saturday nights with the Blessed Sacrament processing through, people are healed, man. The miracles happen, right? Lives are changed.
Starting point is 01:03:31 And yet, when it comes to the liturgy, I love some piety, man. I love some serious focus and devotion, right? So, I think there's a place for everything. I think there's a place for the people to be able to be a part of it. And I think that's the key to the liturgy, right? And I think that's the key to the liturgy, right? And I think that's the key to the liturgy, right? And I think that's the key to the liturgy, right?
Starting point is 01:03:39 And I think that's the key to the liturgy, right? And I think that's the key to the liturgy, right? And I think that's the key to the liturgy, right? And I think that's the key to the liturgy, right? And I think that's the key to the liturgy, right? And I think that's the key to the liturgy, right? And I think that's the key to the liturgy, right? And I think that's the key to the liturgy, right? And I think that's the key to the liturgy, right? And I think that's the key to the liturgy, right? Lives are changed. And yet when it comes to like the liturgy, I love some piety, man. I love some serious focus and devotion, right? So I think there's a place for everything
Starting point is 01:03:50 and you gotta avoid the extremes. And I think that's where we're at right now is trying to find that balance. That's that awkwardness, I think. It is that awkwardness. Yeah, yeah. Well, let's have, speaking of awkwardness, Hallow is a sponsor of this episode.
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Starting point is 01:04:31 And so you can choose these people to read these sleep stories and then you can put like music in the background like synth music and Gregorian chant and things like that. So if you want to get a month or more, I forget, I got to ask them free, go to hello.com slash Matt Fradd by clicking the link below. That way they know that we sent you and they'll continue to advertise. And that's good for me. Okay. It's good for both of us. Win, win. Hello.com slash Matt Fradd. So not that way. You'll get a month for free, but check it out. Cause it's really cool. Sweet. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:04:55 I'm going to grab my iPad right here. Sounds good. Dude, this is fun. This is nice to get to know you this way on camera. Thanks man. Appreciate it. I mean, maybe we should have done it. We should have breakfast or something, but. Dude, I've heard about you for a long time. Yeah. And I was like, why have I not met this man? So. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:05:14 So what are you doing in Superville right now? I mean, I know you live here apparently, but. I know, right? Why are you back? So since I'm the vocation director, I come back once a month for the vocation retreats. Okay. Yeah. So we've got 13 guys who are arriving today.
Starting point is 01:05:29 So right after this, I got to go to the airport for the first pickup of the guys. Okay. Men who are discerning entering our community. So that's terrific. Hey, I want to make sure people know of these books. So we'll put links below. If you can, Neil, no turning back. This is your story of conversion.
Starting point is 01:05:44 Right. Wow. Yeah. I want your story of conversion. Right. Wow. Yeah. Don't want to read it now. Look. Oh, it's a page turner, bro. Yeah. It's good stuff. I, you know, that's one of my first books. So when I put- You all do a great job, can I just say?
Starting point is 01:05:55 Publishing books. It's nice, no? The books are beautiful. The page quality, everything is- I agree. Yeah, the people behind that. Cause you know, it takes a team to do that stuff and they're fantastic.
Starting point is 01:06:04 The type setting, they're amazing people. But that one, a guy helped me write it. I mean, I wrote it, but he had to clean it up and make it flow and everything. And it's, yeah, it's really good. So that's been out 10 years now. Yeah. And then the Consecration of St. Joseph.
Starting point is 01:06:19 Bro, that's taken off. Can I give you my honest reaction when I heard of this? Do it. Honest, and I'm not saying it's good. Can I kick you under the table? You can, I'll put my leg out. I'm like, oh god Do we need another who else do we need to consecrate ourselves? I get it. I understand and st. Andrew. When does this stop? But everybody I have spoken to who's read this book said it's been incredible I was talking to someone right here in my studio the other day yesterday
Starting point is 01:06:43 And they said that I don't know if it's a soccer team or something team here on campus, I guess the guys on the team are very rough around the edges, but one of them suggested they do this and they all did it and benefited tremendously from it. Nice. Awesome, man. Despite my initial, perhaps immature reaction. Shame on you. Yep. Shame on me. Congratulations on this book, not just for putting out a book, but because so many are clearly being blessed by it. What are you hearing from folks? Same thing?
Starting point is 01:07:11 Yeah, same thing. I mean, there's people who are doubtful at first as well, and I get that. I'll never forget one time I was at a parish and the pastor and the associate pastor were there, and we were about to say mass, and celebrate mass with them. And the pastor was saying, at the end of mass, we're going to say this consecration prayer. So the associate pastor goes, what are we consecrating ourselves to today? So hilarious, man. And I get it, right?
Starting point is 01:07:35 So, Because it feels like we just finished explaining to Protestants what consecration means and Mary. Right, right. Here's Father Calloway jacking it up again. And now here's again another book. Well the response to this has been amazing because, you know, we live in a time of crisis in families, marriage, fatherhood, paternity. It's really, you know, people are so confused they don't even want a bathroom to use today,
Starting point is 01:07:56 right? So, we need, like St. Joseph right now. So the response has been amazing because we live in this pornographic, filthy, perverse era. Who's the man who has a chased heart, lived with the most beautiful woman ever? St. Joseph. And so, I've heard men saying to me, and this humbles me, man, that the poison that has gotten into them for decades of self-abuse through pornography and falling into that
Starting point is 01:08:21 repetitive sin that doing the consecration has set them free in a way they'd never been before. Pete Wow. Jared To me, that's just awesome, man. Pete That is great. Jared Right? Yeah. And then other things as well, healing of marriages and just women are finding themselves
Starting point is 01:08:34 restored in their dignity and their affirmation. You know, a lot of women are super insecure these days because they've been hurt by men, whether a father or a boyfriend and whatever, really wounded, whether physically, sexually, whatever, emotionally, but now they're discovering a good man, right? Maybe they never had that example or that good father. And they're telling me that they're sleeping better, right? St. Joseph liked to sleep, yeah. And they're feeling that love from a dad.
Starting point is 01:09:04 That's awesome to me. So, just for the people listening, cause this is super good timing. If people want to do it, it's a 33 day program. If you want it to end on March 19th, the great solemnity of St. Joseph, you need to start it on February 15th, like soon. Yeah. So, what's the date today? 11th. So they got like,
Starting point is 01:09:28 yeah, four days, you got like four days. But the cool thing is, like, if you can't get the hard copy, it's not going to make it in the mail. No worries. Yeah. The e-version, there's the audiobook, there's all that stuff. So, yeah. Wow. And, you know, I think it's probably true. It's not like this is a novel idea. You're unearthing something that the saints have valued. That's right. Talk to that. Yeah, yeah. So, you know, initially I have to say,
Starting point is 01:09:50 I did think it was a novel thing because I had not read a book with this kind of idea. And I actually asked my friends around the world, hey, did somebody write this in Brazil? Is it in Portuguese? I'm not aware of it. Or the Philippines, Tagalog, some saint over there? Nope.
Starting point is 01:10:03 Poland, nope. Well, I said, well, the saints have talked about it, like Saint Peter, Julian aware of it. Or the Philippines, Tagalog, some saint over there? No. Poland? No. Well, I said, well, the saints have talked about it, like St. Peter, Julian, and Imard. He's very explicit. We need to consecrate ourselves to St. Joseph, right? We need to grow in virtue like him. He's our spiritual father. All children are called to resemble their parents.
Starting point is 01:10:16 We do this with Our Lady. We're St. Joseph in this. And many other saints. So I thought, okay, people know about it, but there's no concrete method of doing it. So that's when I felt the Holy Spirit was saying, so you need to do it. So I spent three years putting it together. And am I right in thinking you published this and then it just so happened to be the year of St. Joseph? Cha-ching, yeah. Amazing.
Starting point is 01:10:40 No, bro. So what a lot of people don't know, and this is hard to be humble about, is I actually wrote a letter to the Pope. Yeah. I did. Yeah? Right? Yeah. In 2019, I wrote a letter to the Pope, and I asked him in a one-pager, please declare a year of St. Joseph for the Church, because we've never had one. And 2020 was the 150th
Starting point is 01:11:02 anniversary of him being declared patron of the church, 1870 was when that was done. So I thought, man, 2020 is coming up, we need to do this. Yeah, my book's coming out, true, but now's the time of St. Joseph, I think, and so let's do this. So I wrote that letter to him. It was hand delivered to him by a bishop in Argentina on his Ad limina visit, checking in every five years, hey, how you doing?
Starting point is 01:11:23 Here's a letter from Pali Callaway. So, but we- I got five minutes and he wanted me to take up some of that with this letter. Totally. What else are you doing, Bishop? They had a conversation about it. We got pictures of it. Oh, wow. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:11:37 Then the next year, I got an email, which was wild, from Cardinal Piacenza from the Apostolic Penitentiary, which sounds like the slammer in Rome, right? I'll probably use one, but anyway. So the Apostolic Penitentiary, he contacts me and he says, it's going to happen. Wow! Yeah, and I'm like, what? And then sure enough, on December 8th, the Pope declared a year of St. Joseph.
Starting point is 01:11:58 That is wow. What a mercy, what a grace. Praise God, yeah, it's awesome. Well, I'm going to have to do it. Yeah, man, you got to do it. Can I have this book? All right. Well, do you need that for something? No, you can take it. Because if you don't, I can go get one from the university. But if I do that,
Starting point is 01:12:11 people can be like, hey, pants for the quietest guy. And I just can't handle that anymore. No, no, no, that's, that's all you. The only reason I'm hesitant is because in two weeks we have the hard bound commemorative edition coming out, which has even more. And I got to start in four days. But that one doesn't have your girl. Ah, let's talk about my girl. Yeah, so she, St. Mary McKillop, is that? McKillop, yeah.
Starting point is 01:12:30 McKillop, right? Super devoted to St. Joseph. And I didn't know that until the book came out. Yeah, so for those at home, she's the first canonized saint of Australia who started a religious order teaching children called the Josephites. Right. So I had known those like headlines, but I didn't know the depths. So after the book came out, people from Australia contacted me and said, father, you don't have any quotes from sister McKelper.
Starting point is 01:12:51 And I'm like, I don't have anything from her. Send me materials. What is Australia? Right. Yeah. So they sent me this stuff and I'm like, this is amazing. Really? I've never read it. Yeah. I've never read what she's had to say.
Starting point is 01:13:02 Oh, it's incredible, man. She was super devoted. She took everything to St. Joseph. So the one that's coming out soon in a couple of weeks, it'll have quotes from your girl. That's terrific. Yeah, and the book's doing it. How on earth did this book do so well? What's your secret other than writing good books and releasing them at the perfect time?
Starting point is 01:13:19 Well, because it's got a ton of reviews on Amazon. Dude, as soon as the pope declared the year of St. Joseph, the entire Catholic world said, is there a book on St. Joseph? I'm like, yeah, baby. And I mean, we've sold over a million copies of this. That is remarkable. It's in 18 languages now.
Starting point is 01:13:36 Oh, check this out, you'll love this, right? So I got kicked out of Japan. I'm back, baby. It's being translated into Japanese right now. So back in black, I say World Tour preparation tour in Japan. I think you should go back. Also, have you? Could you go back?
Starting point is 01:13:50 I don't know. I was invited last year, but COVID jacked it up. So when they kicked you out, what did that look like? And was it like you can't come back again? They literally in my passport stamped something that basically said rejected, right? Literally. And I was kicked out. The only thing is I hadn't done anything that got me prosecuted there. So could I go back? I think I could. It's a long way to fly just to find out that you're going to get sent back.
Starting point is 01:14:18 Or do you have to get a visa here first to go there? I don't know. No, I don't think so. But I definitely don't want to be locked up abroad, right? I don't want to be locked up in Japan if that's the case. But so if I disappear guys, bail me out, come looking for me. Yeah. So we'll see at some point. If you start getting random emails saying I need money, it's not spam necessarily. Right. I get those all the time. All right. Well, we have a ton of questions that have come in from
Starting point is 01:14:42 our very handsome and intelligent supporters on locals and Patreon. All right. Very just attractive people, interesting people. Okay. Just. Wow. You did that well. I did.
Starting point is 01:14:53 Thank you. You're blind like me. I got to wear these. Yeah. At first it was like, I can kind of do without it. Now it's like, how come all these words blend together? Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 01:15:04 Well, fantastic supporter Hannah Rose. Sjogren Smith says, do you have a favorite image of St. Joseph, either that you just like visually or that you like to pray with? I do. I commissioned it. So is it in here? Maybe we could open it. I don't know if we can get a good take on it. It might be in that one. Yeah, let's see. I don't know what your favorite image is. Maybe we could open it. I don't know if we can get a good take on it. It might be in that one. Can you hold it up?
Starting point is 01:15:26 Yeah, let's see. I don't know what your favorite image is, so you better find it. Yeah, so you know, I was really disappointed with most images of St. Joseph because he looks like he's about 120 and about to croak. Or some of them, at times, he just looks effeminate. Like, you know, it doesn't look like a dude. So I commissioned a whole bunch of images that show him masculine and strong, and it's in this one see this is there is one in here that I really love where would I hold it here I guess to yeah I don't know if you can zoom in there bro yeah
Starting point is 01:15:51 it might be a little difficult it's very small doesn't matter which one is that you're pointing at this one here sorry oh is he holding an axe yeah that's cool is he standing on skulls no a serpent a serpent yeah that's beautiful yeah so that one there's others that on the website, you can see them. I just like him presented younger than he's been. Now, I want to, isn't he generally understood to be an older man in the Eastern churches? And it doesn't, and you know more than, I'm actually asking, I'm not challenging you. Isn't the Protoevangelium of James describe him as an older man, a widower?
Starting point is 01:16:25 Isn't the Protoevangelium of James describe him as an older man, a widower? Yes and no. So it does lean towards that. It doesn't get specific. But the important thing to remember is that stuff is legend, right? That's not scriptural, it's not inspired. So we can gain bits of information from apocryphal stuff, right? Nothing necessarily wrong with it. Sometimes it gets totally crazy, some of those things.
Starting point is 01:16:42 But that stuff is not canonical, so to speak. It hasn't been, you know, it's not on the same level as Scripture. So tradition's small t in a lot of Eastern churches. But the other important thing to remember with that is why did they come up with that then? It was to defend the virginity of Our Lady, noble cause, right? What man could live with such a beautiful woman and not have desires of the flesh and want to consummate that marriage, right? A man with a heart like Joseph and that's it. That's right. Yeah, exactly So as Fulton Sheen says you don't have to be 95 years old to practice the virtue of chastity, right?
Starting point is 01:17:13 It's actually not much of a virtue at that point because you're practically dead It takes a young man who's alive, right to make that sacrifice. Yeah. Okay. I like that Sam Right? To make that sacrifice. Yeah. Okay. I like that. Sam Mascaro asks, why do you think the devotion to St. Joseph have been overlooked for so long in church history? How can we reconcile our understanding of St. Joseph with that of our Eastern? Well, I just asked that. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:17:35 So maybe the first one. How do you think the devotion to St. Joseph has been overlooked for so long in church history? Well, you know, obviously we don't have anything from him in the New Testament as far as like words, right? Obviously, he spoke and he said, Jesus, He named our Lord. That's what the angel told him to do. But he's a mystery man, right? So we don't know a lot about him.
Starting point is 01:17:56 But then add to that the legends that did creep in, that he's super old, was a widower, and people are like, eh, eh. Yeah, yeah. You know? That makes sense. And it kind of got neglected because of that. Certain saints like St. Teresa of Avila and others would try and approach it from a more pious perspective, but it's only within the last 150 years
Starting point is 01:18:16 that we've really started to unpack him in a more profound way. Wow. Isaac Cruz says, I've recently returned to Catholicism after being an atheist and then agnostic for more than 15 years. What can you recommend to help understand the Eucharist better and why it's so important for Catholics? Wow, praise God. I mean, that's great. I mean, obviously, the most important thing you can
Starting point is 01:18:37 do outside of any practice or book is to be with Him, to spend time with Him. That's the most important. Everything else is going to be a footnote to just spend time with Him. That's the most important. Everything else is gonna be a footnote and just supplement that. But get good books, right? Read about Eucharistic miracles. Read about how the saints died to bring the Eucharist to the natives and how their fingers chewed off doing it.
Starting point is 01:18:58 The heroism and the stories, those are edifying. And then you'll want to imitate, you'll wanna be like that in your love. I'm thinking too of Jason Everett wrote a book, it's not directly about the Eucharist, but it's on John Paul II and it says his five loves. And I know one of those loves is obviously the Eucharist. I remember reading that and being really inspired by that.
Starting point is 01:19:18 Hannah asks, do you have any advice or words of wisdom for couples doing your consecration to St. Joseph together? I do. So this is something that I didn't think of because I'm not married. I heard couples were doing it so that it would end on their anniversary, if they're married, on their wedding anniversary or some significant anniversary if they're in courtship or whatever it is, right? That's brilliant, right? Oftentimes you entrust, you consecrate your relationship to Our Lady and how beautiful that is, right?
Starting point is 01:19:48 Now to bring St. Joseph into that, that's fantastic, it's brilliant. I never thought of doing it until people told me. I think it's... What about just advice in general to do the consecration? It seems doable in that it doesn't seem like a great deal of text that you have to slog through every single day. Right, yeah, it takes't seem like a great deal of text that you have to slog through every single day.
Starting point is 01:20:05 Right, yeah. It takes about 20 minutes a day. There's a couple days it takes about 30. Okay. Yeah, about 20. Yeah. Any advice on how people can stay the course? Yeah, it can be challenging, right? People are people, so sometimes you miss a day and people think,
Starting point is 01:20:18 oh, I got to start over. No, no, no, no, just make it up, right? It's okay. Yeah. I would definitely say don't leave it for the last thing that you do in the day. Just like your rosary, right? It's okay. I would definitely say don't leave it for the last thing that you do in the day, just like your rosary, right? You're gonna fall asleep, right? You're gonna be three Hail Marys deep and you're passed out. Yeah. DKV says, it's been many years since I've listened to your conversion story and I know a
Starting point is 01:20:38 great factor was regarding reading of the apparitions of Medjugorje. What are your thoughts about Medjugorje after the church has condemned the apparitions? Right, right. I don't know. Yeah, it's not condemned. It's not approved either. Right. But I think the local bishop has condemned it.
Starting point is 01:20:53 Yeah, like a previous one, but not even, I wouldn't even say the language of condemn. Okay. And I'm, trust me, I'm no expert on it. Okay. Right. I'm eternally grateful for the impact that it had on me, but I leave all those decisions up to the magisterium. That's not my call. So, I'm grateful for what happened to me, but no one called me.
Starting point is 01:21:13 I think the thing for people to realize who've been to Medjugorje, who may now be doubting the apparitions is that God still works in Medjugorje. Right. God still works in places where apparitions may not be happening. Right. I'm not saying they're not. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, totally.
Starting point is 01:21:28 That's very important to realize. And you know, it's funny because a lot of people, they kind of consider me like the Medjugorje kid, right? Because my conversion was a, Medjugorje was a big part of it. Although I didn't go to Medjugorje until 10 years after. A lot of people think that I like immediately jumped on a plane and went over there. No, I didn't. But I've been there three times. I haven't been there in a long time now.
Starting point is 01:21:52 The fruit that's come out of it is amazing. It is. Have there been bad things? Sure, of course, right? That's the messiness of our world and all of that. So yeah, I just, I'll leave it up to God to determine those things. I've been there three times. You as well? Yeah. Cause I used to live in Ireland. Oh yeah. And that was so many Irish.
Starting point is 01:22:09 And that was closer than going to a Steubenville conference. So we just took our teens there. Yeah. My sister had a conversion there. She went to confession. I would have never thought she would convert. And then one day someone said, your sister's a confession. Yeah. It's amazing. Cause like, it's, it's amazing to me, the, the lightning rod that it's become like many people hate it with a passion Right and if you're associated with it, they just you're in that category and they're like father Calloway He's one of those you know, we can trust them with blah blah blah blah
Starting point is 01:22:33 Then there's the other people who are like match heads, right? Yeah, so it's like everything is about match and I'm just like Hey, I'll leave it up to the church to decide these things sounds like a healthy way to look at it Yeah, Sergei Phelan says, do you prefer the older or younger depictions of, say, I'm going to read these before I read them to you, how about that? Right. I would love to hear your continued thoughts, says Ryan Pung, on the house of Loreto.
Starting point is 01:23:01 In the St. Joseph consecration, it was implied that angels moved it, but I have heard some differing opinions on it from people like Jimmy Akin who have said it is a family name, it is a family name of angel. Does any of this evidence change your thoughts on it? Absolutely not. So papal documents actually totally affirm that the angels translated it.
Starting point is 01:23:21 That's how they say it, not transport, translated it. Maybe it means something etymologically more. And these are written down by popes. So, this is not just Father Calloway or other people saying. So, was there possibly a family name called De Angelis that was there at the time? Sure, I'm not going to deny that, right? But when these things are written down in official documents by the popes, right, Vickers of Christ, not just random thoughts on a plane, official documents and the saints saying things as well. Our Lady of Loretto is the patroness of aviation. Those kind of things, yeah. You got to take it more seriously. Yeah, to me
Starting point is 01:23:57 it's not a legend. To me it's a tradition. Small t, but I believe it. Okay, cool. Michael, it's always Barclay. It's always hard saying last names. I'm ruining all of them. Hey, I'm 23 years old and I spent my first years after high school doing missions around the world and founding a small organization. I've recently felt the call to be a full time evangelist and attend uni. This guy must be from Australia. Yeah. Although then he says I'm heading to Franciscan in the fall.
Starting point is 01:24:23 So probably not. Do either of you have any advice on what to major in? I mean, if you want to be an evangelist, probably theology. Yeah, right. I mean, you're going to, yeah, that's my, if you're coming to Franciscan theology for sure. Yeah. And I'll see you here, Michael. T says, no question for me.
Starting point is 01:24:39 Please just thank him from the bottom of my heart for his book. Praise God. Awesome. How long does it take you to write a book? Yeah, it takes a while. Is this your second? Do you know I got 14 books now? See, I know. What is your name exactly? I'm so sorry. We're terrible.
Starting point is 01:24:55 No worries. I actually know what I'm doing now. You must have prayed for humility and then you're like, who are you? What do you want? I'm working on a cartoon, man. Are you? Yeah. Cartoon book. Yeah. St. Joseph. OK. I'm working on a cartoon, man. Are you? Cartoon book? Yeah. I'm St. Joseph.
Starting point is 01:25:08 Okay. It's going to be cool. It's going to be good. Like a comic? Yeah. A graphic novel. Oh, that's great. I can't draw worth a lick, right?
Starting point is 01:25:16 But this guy, I know a Filipino guy, he is off the charts talented with this stuff. Wow. Yeah. Thanks for doing that. Yeah. So I'm doing the text, he's doing the drawings and so next year it'll be out. That's terrific. Joshua Collins says, hello, Father Calloway.
Starting point is 01:25:27 First, thank you for speaking last year at the Arizona Men's Conference. Your talk was very inspirational on looking to St. Joseph as a means to be a better Christian man. My question is this, as a new Catholic convert from Protestantism, I understand and fully believe the doctrines concerning our lady, but still at times have some uncertainty and mental pushback
Starting point is 01:25:44 concerning certain practices or titles in veneration of Her. Any suggestions or thoughts on how to overcome this? Thank you. Yeah, again, I mean, the relationship is going to be key just to talk to Her yourself. And again, read what the saints have done and all those things. Some of them, you know, they've had their struggles, like St. Therese of Lusieu. She found it very difficult to pray the rosary. She talks about that. Distracted as all get out, right? And yet, she persevered, you know, with what I call – she didn't call it this, but this is what I call it, because it's Therese, you know, butterfly kisses to God. You're going to get distracted, man. I've written five books on the rosary. I've never prayed a perfect rosary. I'm thinking about, did I check that email? What's that smell? I'm all over the place.
Starting point is 01:26:28 But God will take those butterfly kisses in your distractions or whatever because He's a Father, right? And He's not offended when we love our Lady, right? I always tell people this. I have a mom. Love my mom, right? We rubbed when I was a teenager for sure. But now I love my mom so much. On rubbed when I was a teenager for sure. But now I love my mom so much. On occasion when we're traveling together on a pilgrimage or something, people will come up to me and they'll say, Father, your mom is amazing.
Starting point is 01:26:50 Is it okay if we buy her some flowers? Is it okay at the end of the day if we have a cake for her, right? I'm not gonna be like, I'm so offended. Right? No, as a matter of fact, you've got my attention now in a special way. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:27:02 And if I have it within my power to do something for you, consider it done. You honor my mom, you're honoring me. It just makes sense. And Jesus has a mom and he loves her so much. So, it's good. I think too, it sometimes helps to say what we are not saying as Catholics before we say what we are meaning so that you're aware of where the guardrail is, you know? Sort of like talking to, say, a friend who might be a Muslim and you want to explain the Trinity, you want to begin by saying what we're not saying. So we're not saying that there are three gods.
Starting point is 01:27:30 Once that's firmly established, then we can begin to talk about the Trinity, even with sort of pious, even flowery language, but I've already showed you what we don't mean. And so likewise with the Blessed Virgin Mary, if we say, you know, we don't worship her, she's not God, she's nothing compared to he who is to quote Louis de Montfort. Okay. Well then I can go on to say a whole bunch of other things and whatever I'm saying, you know, if it sounds like that, well, then maybe we can clarify, but it doesn't, I don't know. I think that can be helpful to. Yeah, that's what people say about me.
Starting point is 01:28:03 That too. So few of us left. Very humble man. I like that. That too. There's so few of us left. Very humble. Well, this has been a bloody pleasure. I really hope we get to do this again soon. Thank you. Thanks for being here. Anything else you want to point people to? No, I'm good.
Starting point is 01:28:17 Yeah, just go to Our Lady, go to St. Joseph. Crazy times we're living in. Probably going to get a little crazier. Yeah. But let's cling to the truth because it doesn't change, brother. Jesus is the same yesterday, today, and tomorrow. In 20 years from now, we might be nostalgic about these days.
Starting point is 01:28:28 Might be underground at that point, but we'll see. Remember those times we had churches above ground? That was cool. All right, well, God bless and thanks so much. You too, brother.

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