Pints With Aquinas - BONUS | The Thanksgiving Episode, W/ Cameron Fradd

Episode Date: November 27, 2019

Please enjoy! You can find Cameron's podcast here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/among-the-lilies/id1149976656 SPONSORS EL Investments: https://www.elinvestments.net/pints Exodus 90: http...s://exodus90.com/mattfradd/  Hallow: http://hallow.app/mattfradd  STRIVE: https://www.strive21.com/  GIVING Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/mattfradd This show (and all the plans we have in store) wouldn't be possible without you. I can't thank those of you who support me enough. Seriously! Thanks for essentially being a co-producer coproducer of the show. LINKS Website: https://pintswithaquinas.com/ Merch: https://teespring.com/stores/matt-fradd FREE 21 Day Detox From Porn Course: https://www.strive21.com/ SOCIAL Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mattfradd Twitter: https://twitter.com/mattfradd Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mattfradd MY BOOKS  Does God Exist: https://www.amazon.com/Does-God-Exist-Socratic-Dialogue-ebook/dp/B081ZGYJW3/ref=sr_1_9?dchild=1&keywords=fradd&qid=1586377974&sr=8-9 Marian Consecration With Aquinas: https://www.amazon.com/Marian-Consecration-Aquinas-Growing-Closer-ebook/dp/B083XRQMTF/ref=sr_1_4?dchild=1&keywords=fradd&qid=1586379026&sr=8-4 The Porn Myth: https://www.ignatius.com/The-Porn-Myth-P1985.aspx CONTACT Book me to speak: https://www.mattfradd.com/speakerrequestform

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Starting point is 00:00:00 G'day guys. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving and I wanted to share this bonus episode with you. My wife, Cameron Fradd, runs a podcast for women called Among the Lilies. Maybe you've heard of it. Just the other day, she released this episode on Thanksgiving. We sat down, we had a drink, we talked about all that we're thankful for. And we talked about, I don't know, a lot of things that I think will be really helpful. So this is not just us gloating about all the great things that are going on in our lives. We talk about why we should be thankful, why we should rebuke in the name of Jesus, you know, the lie that if only our life was easier, then we could be more grateful or something like that.
Starting point is 00:00:38 So anyway, I hope you'll really enjoy it. And here you go. This is it. God bless. Have a great Thanksgiving. Welcome to Among the Lilies. This is a show for ladies who are tired of pretending and are ready to be real. I'm your host, Cameron Brad. And in today's episode, I chat with this guy right here. Hello. Hello.
Starting point is 00:01:09 All right let's go let's just do it let's just jump right into it. So I was sitting on the couch reading a book you popped your head over and said you'd like to do an episode on for Thanksgiving? Yes that's exactly right. I spent the entire day packing because tomorrow morning at 6 a.m., 0500, 0545 is probably when we need to leave here. We'll be heading out the door, driving to a friend's house, meeting up with them and their five kids, six kids, I don't know, five kids, and then headed to Memphis for a wonderful overnight, and then onwards to Texas. It is going to be a great, fabulous adventure. And my kids are actually going to school out there for a day at our homeschool hybrid. So you have to pack
Starting point is 00:01:56 backpacks, school bags. My mom is very excited to have all the grandkids together. So we're doing a photo shoot, and the theme was peacock. I had no idea what that meant. So I had to go buy everyone clothes. I started looking and found peacock print, sent it to my sister. And she's like, Cameron, you know, peacock theme doesn't mean everyone has to be like
Starting point is 00:02:16 dressed up as a peacock, right? I was like, no, no, I didn't know what peacock theme meant. So she gave me like a color palette. What do you call it? A color swab thing. And it was like, these colors are what you choose from. So everybody hopefully has the correct peacock themed colors. Yeah. Spent all day packing, shipping off our great big giant dog to a friend. Um, shout out. Thank you so much. Crying Family, for looking after Maximus.
Starting point is 00:02:46 And yeah, just getting ready. And I have a podcast episode that I was going to have for this week, but it's kind of sad and on brokenness. It's going to be a great episode, don't get me wrong, but it didn't really ring of turkey and Thanksgiving. So I thought, let's do another one on Thanksgiving. Unless you're a turkey listening. Unless you're a turkey listening. Unless you're a turkey listening.
Starting point is 00:03:09 And then this is a very sad episode. You're about to be butchered and killed. And John Henry is going to eat you for dinner. Speaking of butchered and killed, my friend, Father Chris Prochaszko. And I just recorded an episode on whether it's moral to eat meat meat and use animals for clothing so go to pints with aquinas it was just last this tuesday oh nice sorry to plug myself on your podcast but there it is plug away baby plug away can everyone hear that i heard it for sure okay we don't need to keep doing it i think they heard it so we'll try not to do that we'll just move our heads instead when When we record an episode
Starting point is 00:03:45 together, we share one mic. We actually have two. Oh, the other one's at your office. Yeah. Yeah. So the other one's in another location. So we share, which is fine. I don't think you'll mind, but we have to like bob our heads back and forth and we'll do that instead of that horrible noise. But we went around. I love, so we do this thing in the frat household that at dinnertime, we go around and say our favorite thing about the day. And a lot of our kids have like three favorite things or five favorite things. And one in particular just goes with a million favorite things. And you said tonight, one thing you're thankful for. And so, he said, my favorite thing about today... wait, I'm thankful for God creating me
Starting point is 00:04:26 Wait, that wasn't today Wait, that wasn't today Mommy having me in her womb and giving birth Oh yeah, that wasn't today either So it was really cute He went through a lot of things that he's thankful for For today What are you thankful for, Mr. Fred?
Starting point is 00:04:42 I am thankful for so many things Should we do categories and i can you know think of one sure family family i am just so thankful for you all i am thankful to god because i feel like lately i've been able to really appreciate you guys and us for who we are and not for who we're not. I think I've had this temptation and am tempted at times to look at other families and wonder why we don't have that, not necessarily material-wise, you know.
Starting point is 00:05:21 Less craziness. Yeah, less craziness, calm families. Like, you know, that kid, that familyiness calm families like you know that kid that family they homeschool and they have their homeschooling done by two and their house is tidy and like their dad takes their kids hunting and the only hunting i've ever done is when i've swatted flies and how come i don't know how to do that you know and just kind of like living in that you know but yeah just lately have been really aware of my thoughts and renouncing false thoughts and really choosing to thank god for the gift that you are cammy and the
Starting point is 00:05:54 kids are and just who we are have you noticed me in that you oh you've been amazing you notice that yeah yeah you tell them more about i've been been amazing. You have been so amazing. Thank you. No, and in fact, I think the kids have noticed as well. Why do you say that? Well, because they've said that. What do you mean? Yeah, Peter said, Dad's not angry anymore. No, he didn't.
Starting point is 00:06:17 He totally did. And then you came up and you did something and you're like, oh, Daddy's frustrated. And you were like getting really flustered, I guess, and like kind of barking orders at people to do stuff. And then you calmed down. He's like, and he's done being angry. He did.
Starting point is 00:06:31 I promise you. Why didn't you tell me until now? Well, I just, well, just so you know. You know, it's funny. Yesterday I got frustrated because we were all getting ready to go and just getting kids into a car, you know? Like it takes half hour. And you've said the same thing a hundred times and then you realize they're in the car, but two of them don't have shoes
Starting point is 00:06:49 on. Why wouldn't you have shoes on? You had plenty of time. Why? You know? And so we were in the car yesterday and I just put on that Foo Fighters song. I'm like, just give me the end of the song and I'm going to be okay. What Foo Fighters song?
Starting point is 00:07:02 Sing it. I'm in the sky tonight. There I can keep by your side. And while we're driving and I'm feeling frustrated, I'm aware that I have nothing to be frustrated about. And I'm like, that's kind of embarrassing. And I went through a list of things I could legitimately be frustrated about. Like you getting that fountain in our garage or you know you borrowed to someone lent you a fountain whatever for those listening and just different things like no none of that none of that'll do so it was cool to be able to get over that and just like yeah things are great things are so good one of the things i've noticed a lot lately that i do and this might help your listeners because it's just super real, is I've been talking about how I have, I think we all kind of talk to ourselves and we don't
Starting point is 00:07:50 necessarily say it out loud, but it sort of boils. It's like on the, it's like a, on, it's like, it's simmering. And I said this to you recently, I was at Annie and Kena Hickman's and I sat down, did I share this last time we spoke? No, I don't think you did. And I sat down and I looked around at their picture perfect house. It looks like it comes out of a catalogue, you know. Everything is just perfect and beautiful and neat and cool.
Starting point is 00:08:15 They're just so cool, you know. Mainly Kena. I don't know. Annie is really cool. But I just sat there and I said out loud to them because I knew them. I'm like, oh, I'm starting to spiral. And they're like, what? I'm like, I'm just telling myself like that I, I, my house isn't like this, you know, and like, we're not good at this stuff. And, and, and I know them enough that they know what I'm talking about. They don't need to be kind of given an introductory
Starting point is 00:08:38 lesson on what it means to speak negative thoughts to yourself. But it's like so important, I think, to catch those negative thoughts. Like, oh, gosh, why can't I do this? Like, why can't we do this? And you blow up, you get upset, and you're like, of course you're upset. You've been telling yourself you suck for the last half an hour, right? So I'm thankful to God that he's enabled me to kind of perceive those things and just to call them into the light and to rebuke them in the name of Jesus. I'm also thankful for Mother Miriam, known to everybody else by Sister Miriam, but she's my mother. I've told her she's my spiritual mother, so I call her
Starting point is 00:09:15 Mother Miriam. And I said, I don't care how awkward that is. I'm going to keep doing it. Sort of like when you marry into a family, like, hey, mom and dad, is that awkward? Keep going, press in. Anyway, point is, I was on the phone with her recently and we were praying and I said something to her like, I was joking, you know, I said, gosh, you know, I said to Cameron the other day, this is me talking to Mother Miriam, I said to Cameron the other day, once I get all my stuff in order, we'll get to look under the hood of whatever's going on in your life and that'll be crazy, you know, like we just never had a chance to look at Cameron because we're always dealing with my stuff.
Starting point is 00:09:48 I just thought that was a super fun thing to say, right? But she, being a spiritual ninja, said that I need to renounce in the name of Jesus that my family would be better if I got all my stuff together and that I am the reason there is, you know, it was incredible. I mean, she just, I think I teared up as she was saying it and she just led me in it. Like in the name of Jesus Christ, I renounce the lie that I have to, you know, heal for my family to be perfect and that I'm the problem in my family. And it just crushed me. You know, I just, it was beautiful to do that because about a week ago I was at the, two, three weeks ago I was at the
Starting point is 00:10:29 Catholic Answers Conference and I was speaking there and I sent you a Marco Polo, which you never saw because I deleted it. And it was me saying like, Hey Cammie, like, I'm sorry about this and this and that. And I actually started saying like, I'm sorry, I'm just such a crap husband. Like I'm just, I know I'm not, I'm a great husband, but this is part of like a new thing for me. It's like acknowledging it and not out of pride, but like because of the grace of God, I am a good husband and I'm a good father and I'm broken and I am weak and I fall just like we all fall.
Starting point is 00:10:57 But maintaining my peace throughout that instead of getting upset with myself, which is just a sign of pride because I think I ought to be somewhere. I'm not. Anyway, so I'm really thankful for that. I'm thankful for our four beautiful children. I'm thankful for all of my patrons who helped me do Pints with Aquinas and the Matt Fradd Show. I'm thankful for God's grace that has enabled me to quit my job a couple of years ago and now cut my speaking in half. That's ridiculous. Have you really like done it? Yeah, they won't hear that unless you say it. Have you really cut my speaking in half that's ridiculous yeah yeah they won't hear that unless you say it have you really cut your speaking in half yeah i told um melanie my assistant for those out there yeah like next year so what it was it was nine days a month i said i
Starting point is 00:11:37 want it six days and then i can't quit steubenville conferences and so that's june july and august we talked about that that That's half. And the reason I did that wasn't so I could do nothing. It was so I can go to these developing countries and help proclaim the gospel. Anyway, so glory to Jesus Christ. I'm just super happy and super grateful. Super grateful.
Starting point is 00:11:58 What are you, my darling, happy for or grateful for? That was a lot. I'm thankful for that. I'm thankful for you renouncing your lies because it affects me too. I think that you think about your stuff more than I think about my stuff just because of our temperaments. So I think being melancholic, you're in your head more and your heart and like what's going on. And I'm more like, la, life is so great and wonderful or choleric. I need to get this done. I need to get this done. I need to get this done. And I just, I don't know. I just, I'm not as aware
Starting point is 00:12:37 of where my heart is. Um, but I'm thankful for, um, yeah, I'm thankful for you doing that. And then I'm thankful for Patty Michalosik. I've been without a spiritual director for a bit now. And I never really believed in... Not that I didn't believe in girl spiritual directors. I didn't believe in them. They don't exist. It's not a thing. It's got to be a priest. I'm sorry if you don't have a color, I'm not going to you for spiritual direction. But I have a good friend of mine who's amazing and beautiful and lovely. She actually did one of my first episodes, Fulfillment of All Desire,
Starting point is 00:13:20 I think maybe is what we called it. Anyhow, she's beautiful and amazing. And she's doing this thing. It used to be called Theophastic Prayer. I think it's called TMP or TPM. I don't know. It's some letter thing. And she's doing that one night a week. And I'm doing that and I'm enjoying it.
Starting point is 00:13:44 And then also just kind of having like phone dates with her and just looking at my heart once a week and, and just kind of, I don't know, being aware of what the Lord's doing. And she's just beautiful at, um, she was my supervisor when I was on net and she's really good at me figuring out where my heart is and, um, being more aware of that. I tend to go more numb than over. I feel like you overgo emotion and like, and you get like sucked into this vacuum of emotion and you can't get out of it and I'm more like no feel nothing just go just do.
Starting point is 00:14:12 Totally yeah. Which I think is the opposite of most couples. I think most couples the women tends to be overly feeling and the guy tends to be like no work driven focus like suck it up princess type stuff and we're a little different. Sorry go ahead. What's your laugh? tends to be like, no, work, driven, focus, like suck it up, princess type stuff. And we're a little different.
Starting point is 00:14:27 Sorry, go ahead. What's your laugh? My laugh is suck it up, princess. It's the attitude you have towards me and the kids sometimes. It's not me saying it to you like you're my princess. It's you saying it to our family. Oh, I'm sorry. I love you and my sweet little princess children. It is true though.
Starting point is 00:14:51 Yeah. I, yeah, I'm thankful for our kids. I love our kids. They are wonderful and amazing and I love their personalities and even the ways that they are challenging. I just, I, yeah, we went, we went to a friend's friend's giving yesterday and Peter got these new elf pajamas. We're not a family that's like overly into Santa and elves and like Christmas is about, you know, the North pole. And like our kids don't write letters to Santa Claus. Like when Liam was little, my mom called and was like, ho, ho, ho, Merry Christmas, Liam. Do you know who this is? And Liam's like, no. And she's like, I said, ho, ho, ho, Merry Christmas. And Liam was a little kid and he's like, baby Jesus, is that really you? And my mom was like, only your kid would think of baby Jesus.
Starting point is 00:15:45 I literally said, ho, ho, ho. Obviously I'm Santa Claus. So we don't really over the Santa Claus thing, but the elf is big in our house and Peter loves being the elf. And we were going to a friend's Thanksgiving party and he wanted to wear his new elf pajamas. And I was like, well, do you think you should be dressed up as the elf at a Thanksgiving thing? Oh yes. Mrs. Beckman will love having an elf at her party. And so he was just so cute about like, well, obviously she would love me being an elf. And he was dancing and just kind of wild. He had more sugar than he normally has. So we're all like adults towards the end of the evening and chatting and he's just dancing and doing flips and like loving us looking at him and rejoicing in him spinning. And, um, yeah, it was just great. And, um, yeah, a friend of ours gave us this,
Starting point is 00:16:35 uh, amazing, beautiful KitchenAid mixer because my girls love baking and, and it was just beautiful to have Kiara and Peter like baking in the kitchen. And I don't know. I just, yeah, I'm enjoying our kids right now. And earlier, my back's really sore and I've had headaches the last few days because I fell into the creek. If you're on Instagram, if you're not on Instagram, you really should just go check out. Oh, I don't know if you can see it now because it was on the stories, but there was a video of my daughter on like this
Starting point is 00:17:05 Tarzan rope swing thing vine and she almost fell. So I went to help her and then we both fell and I just like scream at the end of the video and it hurt really bad, but, um, but it was just fun. And the kids just had a great time and just enjoying each other. Um, Matt was out of town. So of course I wanted to make a gourmet dinner for them. Um, so we literally ended up having dinner in our backwoods and it was a loaf of sourdough bread. And I brought out a knife. I think I had some salami and then sliced oranges. Like that was our dinner. And like, we just like ate it in the woods and it was, I feel like, like growing up, that would not be okay. It's like, that is not dinner. You can't have sliced oranges, meat, and bread in the middle of the woods. You got to sit down around a table.
Starting point is 00:17:52 But I loved it. It was great. And the kids loved it. And yeah, I enjoy our family. And I love the craziness that our family is. Yeah. I just think it's really important that we, you know, I think first recognize that a lot of the time we spend time thinking about what we
Starting point is 00:18:11 don't have. And that might be what we don't have as far as like physical fitness or, you know, our spouse doesn't love us the way we want to be loved or, you know, my children aren't the way other friends of mine's children are. And I wish they were. And we just spend our time like wishing to be something other than we are. Wishing for a different vocation or wishing for something. And the thing is like nobody is exempt from the cross. We're all called to carry a cross.
Starting point is 00:18:47 cross. We're all called to carry a cross. So I just would like to invite everybody out there this Thanksgiving to renounce in the name of Jesus, you know, all of these things, this spirit of envy that we have towards other families and parents, like, why can't we homeschool our kids? You know, why are our kids like this? Why do they fight? Why can't they dress themselves properly? Like, you literally look like a homeless child, you know why are our kids like this why do they fight why are they why can't they dress themselves properly like you literally look like a homeless child you know or like why do they keep doing this or why is my spouse like this and instead just to kind of you know thank god for what we have cammy like i sometimes think like you know it's again i fall into this you fall into this we all fall into this, we all fall into this,
Starting point is 00:19:25 right? Of like thinking, I wish you were more like this or I'm as you know, but I am just so grateful that you are who you are and that you're my wife and I love you. And like, that doesn't mean right that, you know, like in saying that, I'm kind of saying this the other way around. So it's going to sound a little jarring in saying, I love you and I'm so grateful for you and you're the best decision I ever made, that's not to say. I don't sometimes think, gosh, I wish you were more like that. Or why can't you be more like this? Or why can't you do that more? Why can't you love me the way I need you to love me? I experienced this, you experienced this. You're out there, you're not weird in experiencing this. Yeah, does that make sense? I guess it's
Starting point is 00:20:06 like renouncing in the name of Jesus Christ, that envy that we have towards the Instagram people and then praising God for what we do have. And then realizing that it's God and God alone that can actually satisfy our heart, not the broken human being we decided to marry or the children we had. And we don't even realize that we're looking to them to fulfill us so we can feel like a perfect parent. But the more we can like stand before the father and be accepted by him, the more it's okay if my kids are angry at me. And it's okay if my wife or my husband doesn't love me the way I would like them to love me, because I'm free in him.
Starting point is 00:20:46 And when I'm free, then these other things, you know, maybe they need to be addressed, but they don't make or break me. Make sense? It totally makes sense. And I think also being content and happy with where we are and what we have, you know? So maybe you're out there and you're just so focused on why am I not married? Like, why can I not be in that stage? Like, oh yeah, well you guys have kids and you're married. So obviously you're happier. Like that's why you're
Starting point is 00:21:16 happy. And if only I could, and it's like, we would look at you and be like, oh my goodness, you can go and like sit and do whatever you want. You can binge Netflix or whatever. You can go and spend two hours in adoration. You could sit down and eat a meal and not be wearing your food. Like you can eat food when it's hot. It's not going to be cold by the time you're done serving all your kids. Um, or I don't know. I have a friend that's like going through like, um, like early menopause and she's not ready to be done having kids and that stinks. But then I have another friend who's like pregnant every time her husband looks at her and she doesn't want to be. And it's like, oh my goodness, I'm drowning. Like, please let it stop. And then I also have this other friend that got married,
Starting point is 00:22:00 I think around the same time as us and just struggled with infertility and just were so beautifully trusting in the Lord. And I wanted to like control it for them. I'm like, well, you know, you guys could do this. Like you could fly to Omaha, you could have the surgery, you could hardcore NFP it. And like, you could figure this out. Like Creighton has ways you can get pregnant. Like if you only do this and, and I, in some ways it was like, why are you just so accepting? Like, like you could do something about it. Like, 20 years ago, you had to be this accepting. But now, like, science is on your side. Like, there's so much you can do in the church, and you can get progesterone shots and whatever.
Starting point is 00:22:34 And they were just trusting and accepting. And now she's pregnant. After how many years? They got married after us or before us? I think before us. So how many years have we been married? 13? 14? 23? I think before us. So how many years have we been married? 13? 14?
Starting point is 00:22:46 23? 50? 50 years. Just another example of how I'm the woman in this relationship. We have been married for 13 years and it'll be 14 next August. Continue. And it was August the 12th that we got married on. Go.
Starting point is 00:22:58 I knew that. I knew that part. I knew it was August the 12th. I just... 2008? Six. Six. Oh yeah,am was born in 2008 so i write 2008 a lot more than i write 2006 you're right we got married in 06 liam was 08 peter was no avala was
Starting point is 00:23:14 09 doesn't matter don't keep digging yourself out of this we love you we all love you and accept you Continue. I have a friend of mine that's doing my Instagram posts again. So I have, she's a busy mom of five homeschooling kids. And we were going to do like this big post or something for the feast day of St. Cecilia, I think it was. And she wrote to me and she's just like, I'm just having a really hard day and I'm not going to get this post out. And, you know, and I'm like, oh, don't even worry about it. Like, I know, like, I'm sure it's stressful with the kids. And, and I love, um, the, like, y'all are amazing and beautiful. And my main core lilies, like those of you that are on Patreon, I just, I love you. And I really know that you give me the benefit of the doubt. And I love that you're okay with my imperfections.
Starting point is 00:24:08 And as I jokingly, you know, the drunken aunt, whatever, like you love that about me. And I love that you're okay with that. And that's the same side of me that instead of being like, no, I had, you were supposed to schedule this and this should have been out. It's like, no, no, I much rather life's insane. I can't do it. And it's like, okay, don't worry about it.
Starting point is 00:24:25 It's fine. Or getting it up. Yeah, go ahead. Yeah, something about my patrons that's similar to that. It just was awesome. So about two months ago, I started releasing Pints with Aquinas episodes a day early and ad-free. Okay?
Starting point is 00:24:41 That was a really cool thing. I started doing that. And then as I started doing i'm like this is a lot of work you know i gotta get the podcast up early enough so i can give it to my patrons a day early and i have to edit two episodes so that one has ads and one doesn't okay but then i was so then i missed a week and someone on patreon said hey where's those early episodes and i felt terrible about it and so i went on to patreon and i did a um what do you say like a survey and i said all right here's the deal i'm so happy to do this for you it takes a lot more work and that's why i haven't done it lately but
Starting point is 00:25:15 if you want it i'll do it how many of you want this and it was overwhelming like overwhelming people were like i just i don't care like because i don't want to put any more work on you so it's the same sort of thing that you were saying that like people are just like i just want to support the work you're doing yeah and that's brought me to tears more than once it's beautiful yeah that's so beautiful we had something recently um without going into who it was or anything um respecting this person's privacy, but it was really beautiful. We had someone share. So I probably have, I don't know, maybe 20 women. I don't know how many, but probably like 20 women on this Marco Polo among the Lily's group. And they're amazing, beautiful women. There's probably six, six to 10 at a time. They're like
Starting point is 00:26:01 doing all the chatting, right. And talking about this, that, and the other. And they're beautiful, lovely ladies. I love them. I feel like I've become real life friends with all of them and it's just great. And one of them shared something recently that was like really vulnerable and very intimate and just really raw. And it was like, here's my heart. And she shared it in such a beautiful way. And the very first person that responded was someone that's also more melancholic, but never talks. And she's like, I just want to say, like, I feel like normally the clerics and sanguins
Starting point is 00:26:34 like kind of rule this Marco Polo just because they're on more and they want to say stuff. For those who don't know, Marco Polo is like a video sharing app. It's like leaving a voicemail, but it's a video message. Yes. You can do it in groups. Yes, and you can do it in groups. And from one of my tiers for among the Lily patrons, you get access to this Marco Polo group. And so it's women from all over the country. Actually,
Starting point is 00:26:55 we have a lot of Canadians to all over, technically all over the world. Um, anyhow, it was really beautiful. This next girl gets on and it's like, I'm melancholic. I've, you know, who, and if you don't know the temperaments, I did an episode previously on the temperaments, but it was really beautiful. And she just kind of shared like, okay, this is, I relate to this. And then another girl shared, you know what? I really like, it was a newlywed and it was something with her husband. And another girl came on and it's like, I'm your husband. She's not her husband. That's not, this came out very wrong, but she could relate to her husband and basically was able to share her heart in a way like that maybe a man wouldn't have the words, but she did. And it was beautiful. And there were so many
Starting point is 00:27:35 people that just like, it was just, it was beautiful. And you could just see the Holy Spirit in it. And the girl got back on and it's like,, wow, I'm so honored and humbled by this. But it was just really lovely and it was like kind of all the advice and answers. And there's some older women, there's some younger women, and it's just really beautiful. Like right now everyone's talking about Christmas and what to do. There's some that are first-time moms or married couples. Like how do we figure out this whole, like, what do you do as
Starting point is 00:28:05 Catholics and Christians and Christmas? And, um, at one, at one point there was one girl that shared, she was really, she's a convert or she's in the process of going through RCIA. And so she was raised evangelical. She has a really hard time with Our Lady. And it's like, I just don't get this whole Mary thing. Like the very next Marco Polo, it's a new girl introducing herself. She's a convert from Protestantism, and she's working on writing a book on Our Lady. And she's like, wait a minute, did you listen to my message before? And she had no idea. So, like, I love how the Holy Spirit kind of pulls it all through, but I'm thankful for those ladies, and I love that group. So, I feel like we went from family, now we're kind of talking about work stuff, what we're thankful for those ladies And I love that group So I feel like we went from family And now we're kind of talking about work stuff
Starting point is 00:28:47 What we're thankful for Yeah, no, this has been terrific I mean, we said this was going to be a 20 minute episode It's been 28 minutes Is there anything else you want to touch upon? Sorry about that squeak I promised I wouldn't do that I don't know if you hear it
Starting point is 00:29:01 This microphone is really... Anyway, keep going We hear it, so even if you don't. I am thankful for Focus. Kiara, Avila, and I are going out to SLS, so shout out. Any of you that are going, do you know what SLS stands for? No. Me either.
Starting point is 00:29:19 Focus does this thing. So they do this big seat conference every other year, and in between they do something called SLS. One of you, please tell me what this thing. So they do this big seat conference every other year. And in between they do something called SLS. One of you, please tell me what this means. My understanding of it is it's more of like a leadership type conference, but we're going to be doing a live among the lilies recording New Year's Eve in Phoenix. I'm super excited, but my girls are coming with me and they're really excited about it too. And I'm excited to just have, yeah, a girl's trip in December. I'm excited to just have a girls trip in December. I'm excited for our road trip. I'm going to Thanksgiving with my family. I have three sisters and my mom and dad and my Grammy that live in Dallas. And so I'm really excited to see all of them and all of them have husbands
Starting point is 00:30:00 and at least a child upwards of three children. And I'm really excited just to have, it's going to be crazy when we get together, but I'm really excited for my kids to have that time with their cousins and for me to see my nieces and nephews. And yeah, I'm excited for that. And just to be present. And I think it's easy to get stressed
Starting point is 00:30:21 about the meal or the turkey or whatever. I think Thanksgiving can have a lot of stress to it, but if we lower expectations, like one of my sisters, um, is hosting and I am so appreciative that she's hosting, like it's huge. She's opening up her house. It's going to be a lot of people. Um, and she set out like a signup sheet and it was probably just like, let's all be on the same page. Who's bringing what? But for me, I saw a signup sheet and it was probably just like, let's all be on the same page. Who's bringing what? But for me, I saw the signup sheet and I was just kind of like, oh crap, she expects me to bring a turkey or bake a ham the morning of, like, how am I going to do this? I'm driving from cross country.
Starting point is 00:30:55 And I kind of got stressed out over it. And I was like, you know what? I'm just going to ask her. So I called and I left her a message and I was just kind of like, I need to know what the expectations of me are. Because I feel like if I was to cook all day in my mom's house, I am a messy cooker and my mom is very neat and tidy. And I was like, I don't know that she would appreciate it. And then I also need to look after my kids. And then, and so it's just like, I just need to know the
Starting point is 00:31:18 expectations. Like I'm happy to go to the store, but I don't necessarily want to go the day, Thanksgiving day or the night or the day before. But it was good. It's like, okay, we need to be clear of expectations. And then I think we could put our guards down and just rejoice and be with each other. Because I think so much of Thanksgiving is just taking the time to be with one another and be thankful and share our hearts. I always loved when we lived in Canada, there was a handful of families. We were all missionary families who one of the spouses were American, and we would do our own American Thanksgiving. And I love, I feel like the, not that the bar was low. I felt like the, I don't even know how to describe it. I feel like there wasn't high expectations and stress,
Starting point is 00:32:09 but we all got together and loved each other well and shared. And it was just about being together and having this, I don't know, special occasion type thing. I don't know. You're not even American. What do you think of things? No, I'm excited. No, I think you're right. I haven't actually thought of the fact that we're getting
Starting point is 00:32:25 together to be thankful until you you just said that and so i have to think that most of us are kind of like that we don't even realize that this thing that we're all doing is in order to be thankful right um also why are you wearing my socks i just realized you're wearing my socks i bought 20 pairs for me why are you wearing them Why are you wearing them? Why did you buy purple socks? Because they come in those packets. They don't have just one color. You don't have a choice. Why are you wearing my socks?
Starting point is 00:32:50 Did you go into my drawer? No, they were in my drawer. Okay, then did you put them there? No. Sienna Beckman, this is your fault. It's all right. All right, guys, listen, this has just been a bloody pleasure. I hope you have a great...
Starting point is 00:33:04 Be thankful that someone else isn't wearing your socks. When we are in Dallas, if you're a listener in Dallas, this Sunday we'll either go to the Divine Liturgy at the Byzantine Church or the Extraordinary Form. So we'll go to one of them. Why are you looking at me like that? I saw your eyebrow drop. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:33:22 It's news to me. I feel like we should... Well, yeah, that's what we'll be doing. If you belong to one of those churches, look out for us. We'd love to meet up with you and say hi. Alright, we good? Yes, we are good. I would love to know
Starting point is 00:33:36 what you're thankful for. I'm going to share this on Pints too. Okay, wow. This is going up on Pints, people. We're in the big league with the Pints. Big time. Not these little six ounce servings of beer. We're going all the way with a big old pint. And I was going to say something else, but I forgot. You want to let them let you know what you're thankful for. I was really impressed. We did an episode on NICU babies and preemies, and I, oh, ladies, thank you so much for sharing your stories. So many of you have been through the ringer, and you have little living miracles, and thank
Starting point is 00:34:16 you so much for sharing your stories with them. And I have another one coming out soon. Next week, we'll be on miscarriages, and I would love to know your miscarriages stories. But yeah, everyone should have something that we're thankful for. And my family's always the, if someone didn't have a place to go, it's like, hey, come on over, you know? And so if you don't have somewhere to, I can't invite you to my sister's house because there's already too many people, but please find somewhere to go. Like just find someone to have a meal with and just to rejoice in. And even if it's just like a friends giving thing that counts too. And I think it's good just to come together and be appreciative.
Starting point is 00:34:54 And I don't know, I like Charlie Brown's Thanksgiving watching that and thinking of sitting down Indians and pilgrims. And, um, I don't know if we're still allowed to say that it may not be politically correct, but I'm going to say it anyhow. I think it's really cool when you have two different cultures come together and it's like, okay, they needed each other to survive.
Starting point is 00:35:14 We exist here today because the Indians helped the pilgrims survive, you know, new England. And, and I love the idea of sitting down and feasting and rejoicing over a meal. So I hope you all have a lovely and blessed Thanksgiving. Yeah, do you mind just jumping off my leg because it's dead? Sorry, darling.
Starting point is 00:35:34 My wife has been sitting on my leg for this entire episode, and I have enjoyed it immensely, but it's totally dead. No, don't be sorry. It is a sloop. One thing that I'm sure a lot of people know about, but you taught me about, was the blessing cup. So if you don't know, here's what you should do this Thanksgiving. Pour a gigantic glass, like a bucket really,
Starting point is 00:35:55 just one of those red buckets with the metal handles that goes back and forth. No. Do a blessing cup and share it and spread it around and around the circle and everyone say what you're thankful for. That could be a beautiful thing. Or if you don't want to get cooties, maybe everybody have their own cup and you could do it too. Same thing. Like a toast. All right. Bless you, friends. Bye. guitar solo you

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