Plumbing the Death Star - How Would You Raise the Devil?

Episode Date: October 13, 2024

It’s my three dads as three dads do their best to raise a demon baby! You see, these three dads don’t have a kid and this here demon kid doesn’t have three dads! It truely is a match made in heaven. Well actually hell. Or more practically Italy we think? JD takes us through the plot of Omen while Zammit get m-pregged and Jackson gets caught up in a Diet Coke baby scandal. Who knew raising a baby with bad vibes would be so hard for three hapless dads?Links to everything in our linktr.ee including our terrible merch, social media garbage and where to become a subscriber to Bad Brain Boys+ Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

As women, our life stages come with unique risk factors, like high blood pressure developed during pregnancy, which can put us two times more at risk of heart disease or stroke. Know your risks. Visit heartandstroke.ca. What do Mattel, Banana Republic, ButcherBox, and Glossier all have in common? They power their businesses with Shopify. Shopify is the most innovative and scaled commerce platform on the planet. That also happens to have the best converting checkout on the planet.

And that's no industry secret. That's Shopify. Learn more at Shopify.com slash enterprise. You're listening to the Sans Fans Network. Hey everyone and welcome to this week's episode of Plumbing the Death Star. I'm Joe. I'm Jackson. I'm also Joe.

If you forget which one of us is which, I'm the one drinking the milk. Plumbing the Death Star is a comedy and Pop Culture Podcast and ask the important questions like, how would you raise the devil? And now you're probably thinking, how would you raise the devil probably with some kind of satanic ritual no no no I mean you've got Damien the baby devil and they fuck up in the omen and they raise it wrong. He becomes the president. Yeah which is something no one wants the child to be.

Yeah clarification before we get into anything. Am I raising him to be the antichrist well, I guess what's my aim? Regular boy right yeah, okay, you're saying that no one wants to raise their child to be a president What do we want to raise our son to be a carpenter so I will say? Jesus Christ so chiropractor like Christ this episode will have some spoilers of the somewhat recent film The First Omen, and lots of spoilers for the not at all recent film The First Omen. The Omen 1976 and The First Omen 2024.

In The First Omen, it is revealed that the church wants the antichrist to come back Yeah, because if the antichrist is back then religion becomes a big box We're gonna be saved so we got to sign up to does that also mean Christ comes back to the antichrist When you say mega big box does that mean like he's getting money? So is it money or is it people coming to the church? I think well, I think when people go to the church and they need salvation the church gets money Yeah, because the church I don't know if you know this and listeners strap in yeah, they're not very good guys Frick dude. I'm just like if you if you have a

Christ they come the people religion goes up people come in give money But the Antichrist is here to bring around the end of the world. Yeah money is meaning no But you I guess the idea is you like the church will figure it out And I haven't the church will figure it out. I give the priest I say I say, okay Hey father great service and I shake his hand, but I've got a $20 note in my hand And I'm like, yeah, I know you weren't raised a religious or no or went to many a church That it's not that subtle. They just they give you a plate There's a collection play and then then I got bribed the priest We probably can hey do a good sermon if you want you could maybe with like to your $20

If you know you could clip a note onto it. Hey, don't give you extra grace for this guy Yeah, they just yeah, there's a section of church where they just hand out a ball. Yeah your money Yeah, like there is like shame associated with it if you just chuck it in coins and people make sure you put it in notes. That's funny. You'll go into hell so quick. And don't you dare steal money from that collection plate because if you do and you're like sick and got a $20, when you leave the church you'll pat your hair, put your jeans down and you're like, where'd it go? And then you look up and you're in hell. Oh, no! Yeah, I don't know what happened about 20.

Yeah. So in the Omen franchise, and I haven't seen the, well, the third entry in the film, which is the one where he becomes the president. Played by Sam Neill, which is funny. That's awesome. And I also think that Jesus comes back, or he's trying to stop Jesus from coming back.

Mm-hmm. If you're the Antichrist, that should be like, you know. So I don't think the church, I think the church, the plan doesn't make a lot of sense. I think that plan would be like Antichrist is back, there's evil back on earth, people have to come back to the church. Then I guess they're probably like, and we're taking care of everything, so we'll just sort out the anti- we will stop the antichrist. Is this how the rapture works? Because the antichrist is part of the same, like, faith that involves the rapture.

Yeah. So, the antichrist turns up. Yeah. Either the rapture happens, I guess it must be the antichrist turns up. Antichrist turns up, we don't know he's a fucking antichrist. No.

He's just super charismatic, and everybody loves this guy. Or in Damien's case, oh, sack of shit, weird kid. But everybody loves him, he gains power. Baboons try and kill Damien. That's crazy, because I would have put baboons on the side of evil. Same! Baboons fucking hate Damien.

That's nuts. Baboonliness is next to godliness, I suppose. But then the rapture happens. They go to a safari and the animals are pissed off when they see Damien. But they all are pissed off, but then baboons are the only ones who try and do anything about it. That's crazy. I would have thought that...

Well, I guess baboons have no sin. But I'm hearing. Yeah, they're without... Well, they don't have original sin because they got those beautiful arses out, which is something that original sin teaches us. And then they've got their blue face cheeks things going on. Baboos are scary. Do they get flanges like an orangutan?

I believe so. Good. Yeah. Oh, but the wrap? Did you know that with orangutans, I think it's orangutans. Yeah. Might be another ape that gets flanges. But usually when it's like the alpha male, that's the one that gets the flanges or whatever.

And there was this case in this zoo somewhere, where like the one male, that's the one that gets the flanges or whatever. And there was this case in this like zoo somewhere, where like the one male there that was the prominent male, was like, well that's the male, but he's got no beautiful flanges, what's going on? And then the main zookeeper chuffed off for a bit, and that's when he got flanges. Because for some reason he's like, no no this guy's in charge That guy's in charge That guy brings his food and shit So I can't how could I be the the most important person in charge with my incredible flanges when that guy is there Does that mean when the zookeeper left he was like fuck I gotta step up. Yeah, I'm not this step orangutan I'm the orangutan who stepped up exactly then he gets the flanges and the zookeeper comes back and he's like I'm an idiot I'm so fucking stupid Exactly, then he gets the flanges and the zookeeper comes back and he's like

He becomes back and the ragged thing is like May I am in charge I am the one who big so much funny to imagine go to the zoo and like the orangutans Like really pissed off with the yelling at the crowd. You're in it. You just turn and there's a guy with a really wide stuff like the yelling at the crowd you're in and you just turn and there's a guy with a really wide face. Bro, you gotta run! Dude, they hate your flanges! What do you mean? Dude, you gotta either run or get in there. Wait, you gotta wrestle these guys up, man. Fuck! No, but the rapture happens, and then after the rapture we get a bunch of sinners left,

and then Christ comes back. And forgives them of sin? Well, no then Christ comes back and gives them of sin Well, no he Christ comes back and helps them fight the Antichrist And if you were good in that period of time you get a second go and go into heaven. Yeah, I'm pretty sure his out works Yeah, so So in the Omen movies, yeah the plan of the church is that they're trying to make a demon baby right the Antichrist is when Satan has a child with his own offspring.

Woman in a jackal, right? Or man in a jackal? We have to fuck a jackal? Yeah, no we don't. We just got the kid. The set up is that the American ambassador and his wife are expecting a child. Okay. She fuck a jackal. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, not like a jackal jackal. Basically, this baby is made separate to anything we do. So demon baby is happening at a church. We have a baby and they're like, so sorry your baby didn't survive,

but our baby is fine, well was fine, it's not fine anymore. And then they're like, but don't worry. There's a fresh baby where the mother died. So we got you, no kid, So we got you, no kid. And we got kid, no mom. Just bring them together. You don't even need to tell your wife this kid isn't yours.

And it has a 666 birthmark on its head. What the hell about it? That's cool. Now we'll know which one is ours when we like it in the playground. When we lose that kid at the park. Whatever. Okay, I like that.

It's like you three dads don't have a kid. This kid doesn't have three dads. I can make the math. Exactly, figure it out, genius. Okay, so now we have a devil baby. All right, fabulous. Yeah, and the devil baby's fine for five years. Okay. Okay.

Oh, those are like the hard years. Yeah, it's easy. The kid turns five, smooth sailing. I was like, the first five, because there's the tit, you know. First off, you have to adapt to being, you know, new parents, like, the crying. I gotta wear the fucking Meet the Fockers fake tits or whatever. Yeah. You'd be a great Mr. Fockers.

What do you mean by that? Oh, no, wait, Greg is the fucker. Who's Robert De Niro? Who's the fake tit man? He's Robert De Niro What's his in the RV? Yes They call him Greg cuz that's his nickname. Yeah, yeah, Lord fuckers not a day Yeah, yeah, but I'm sure I was in and Dustin Hoffman down

Yeah, yeah, those are the Fawkes. And then there is, who is Mrs. Fawkes? As in like, Ventilla's wife. Is it Christina Applegate? It could be, I don't know. What? Are you saying I would make a good who? Which guy?

I think you'd make a good guy that's wearing fake tits. Yeah, baby. Okay, that I agree with. But I don't think you'd be a good Robert De Niro. You'd be, that feels more of a Dustin, you'd be a good Dustin Hoffman. Yeah baby! That I agree with. I don't think you'd be a good Robert De Niro. That feels more of a Dustin Hoffman. You'd be a good Dustin Hoffman. Yeah okay. You'd be a good father of gay Lord Falker. Yeah. Alright, fair enough. I'll breastfeed the kid though. I'm happy to do that. That's fine dude. That sounds nice. Yeah whatever, I'll

just wear the fake titties. He can have a drink, I can have a drink. Yeah! Oh that's awesome. Yeah dude. Drink from my own titties? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think what you can do, I think, is if you can get like a little nipple. Straw? Yeah. There's like rubber nipples on a bottle, you put that over your finger and you can kind of get a tube

and you put that into where the milk is and that's how you can feed. I can do this one to Diet Coke. This one to breast milk. Oh, you're feeding yourself. Or, I mean, the KitKat of Diet Coke. This one to breast milk. Oh, you're feeding yourself. Or, I mean, the kick out of Diet Coke, if you want. Yeah, Diet Coke's good for babies. That's why it's Diet Coke for babies.

Can I take over feeding Judy's? Well, do you want to hear what happens to Damien, or like what? At the moment, I just have a, we have an infant. The Jackson's giving to die Before we had the baby our baby's gonna be famous it's gonna be used in the arts Okay, I now have to somehow learn some legalese to get out of I'm assuming an airtight Diet Coke contract with our baby.

You say I get a year supply of Diet Coke and all I gotta give you is my baby? To become the Diet Coke baby? The baby gets fame, fortune, and I get a year supply of Diet Coke? That's... What's the downside? It's like return the Diet Coke. That's... What's the downside?

It's like, return the Diet Coke, we're getting back the baby. God damn it. Does it matter if I've already drunk half? Ah, okay. By the way, I need to piss heaps. I'm so full of gas, dude. I'm so full of it. Okay, so we have a baby, and we're in debt to DietCo.

Okay, good starting point. Well as it comes up I assume. Well, because the first thing that comes up is very intense. Okay, so we've had the baby for five years. Everything's mostly been fine. I'll take the feeding nappy change. Sure, whatever. I'll just see what's going on going on yeah yeah you can take the

nap well I'm assuming I'm not allowed with the baby because the diet Sprite came over today I said they definitely can't have the baby I mean they made a good deal and I said and like and there's like no soft drink we would say yes to like not even like Like he is a doctor so that's like we take a baby to the doctor all the time Why are you taking baby to doctor so much just a check on it Are we gonna stick with Damien does it come named do we get to know so much? Just to check on it. Yeah, just to make sure it's alright. Are we gonna stick with Damien? Does it come named?

Do we get to name it? No, we get to name it. Okay. I'm not a big fan of Damien. Yeah, Damien I'm not into. Well, here's the thing with Damien. I don't know if even as an infant he is secretly influencing shit. Because he influences a lot in the course of this film without actively doing anything. Okay, okay

Yeah, so everything's chill for a bit, right, but then it's fifth birthday Okay, he has a nanny right who kills herself at the party. Okay, that doesn't feel like that's on him Yeah, well it is we don't know. Yeah. No, no, sir. The parents in the omen don't clock that it's his fault until Pretty much. That's fine. Yeah, so I guess it's like we got some hurdles though because initially it's like well We naming this our beautiful baby. Yeah, maybe we each picked sound Okay So, Gragu, okay, okay, okay. Star Wars is gonna be, oh no. Oh no.

You then get me being like, can we have a difference? Okay, let's go, let's start again. Okay, you go first then. Okay, let's go with a J. Ed. Un. Jetun. Okay, we got baby Jetun.

Jetun, and then are we gonna have Jettin Zamadusha Bailey? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Triple barreled surname. Yeah, yeah. Jettin's pretty close to Jattin, which is a real name. Yeah. Jettin's fine. Honestly, with where it could have gone.

Exactly. I guess to pay homage to Star Wars, this middle name is now Grogu. Jettin. Grogu Zamadusha Bailey Yeah, it's lovely I like that we've double-barred our last name in reverse alphabetical order Yeah Zamadusha Bailey sounds nice

Yeah, you better Bailey Dusha Zamad That sounds crazy That sounds like a list where Zamadusha Bailey does sound like a name We could also call him Zmushli Jaden Grogu Zmushli Ooh, he's a powerful boy And then we'll all take Zmushli. We'll go and find him. Jaden Grogu Zmushli. Ooh, he's a powerful boy. And then we'll all take Zmushli too.

Yeah. Joel and Joel Zmushli. Yep. And Jackson Zmushli. Maybe I'll become Joel too, just for ease. Yeah, it's easier. Change our names. We have a long day at the birth, deaths, and marriages.

Yeah. Getting out of our names change. Hey, so we've got a kid we'd like to register. And just for your change and stuff. I'd like to be Joel and we'd all like to be Zamooshly. And the baby's name is? Jaden Grogu Zamooshly. Jaden? I mean, Zaden, excuse me.

Jaden Grogu Zamooshly. No, it was Jaden originally. Yes, Jaden. Jaden. Jaden Groguzomusha. Sorry, I get confused with real names and everything that isn't a name. Jeddon. A beautiful baby Jeddon.

J-D-J-G-G-Z. G-Z. You know for simplicity's sake. Little J-Z. To shorten it. Joseph Gordon's Leavitt. Anyway, so we got a beautiful baby. Yup, we're raising our rod eyes soon.

Everything's fine, we're getting ready to go. Shorten it Joseph Gordon's level Anyway, so we got a beautiful baby. Yeah, we're raising our right eye soon. Yeah, everything's fine We've got a nanny because we're work for the government. We've got to pay off that crippling Then yeah tragedy strikes Nanny that was great Yeah jumps out a window hangs herself. Okay,, jumps out a window, hangs herself. She jumps out a window and hangs herself? I imagine she jumped out a window. For some reason she was hanging her, then lassoed a rope around a tree, which can't

be right. No, you know what? Actually she doesn't jump out a window. She jumps off a balcony, nooses attached to the balcony, and as she hangs she swings and goes through a window. Well, I feel maybe... Did we know the nanny well? Was she troubled? No she- I just missed the signs I guess.

Yeah I guess so. That's pretty much the vibe in the film. Yeah, yeah. Why would she do that? Well that's what I mean, that's sad, that's sad. Right in front of our kids? Right in front of Jadon? Right in front of Jadon? Yeah.

Jadon. Jadon. Jadon. Now why are you forgetting our baby boy's name? Can we just call him Jed? We can call him Jed for sure. Yeah, Jed Groguz you forgetting our baby boy's name? Can we just call him Jed, please? We can call him Jed for short. Yeah, Jed Grogu Zemushli.

You're also forgetting our name? Briefly, yeah. Okay. So the nanny takes her life in front of our beautiful Jed. Wrecks the fifth birthday party. And also all our friends? Yeah. That's just like, it's just like a kind of tragic day. That's a tragic day our friends. Yeah, that's just like it's just a tragic day

It's a mostly family meeting we talk about it we work through it we go to the funeral Annie she you know I guess none of us or it common is she you know we thought you know She was we she seemed fine the hanging makes the news Why what I guess it was a crazy way to hang yourself And it gets even crazy because the newspaper publishes a photo. I shouldn't do that, dude Which family in massive legal life long legal battle with the Yeah, this is a mostly family formerly known for the diet coke scandal experience tragedy yet again.

So at the same time as, so basically a nanny rolls in the next couple of days being like, hey, I'm here to take over from the tragic loss and like, who hired you? And they're like, don't worry about it. That's fair. It was very public and it's nice that you're helping us when you have breathing time. Sweet free nanny, dude. Yeah. We're three dads who are incompetent.

So we need some help. And at the same time a priest comes to us and is like, I heard the news. Yeah, it's sad. Everyone's hearing it. Are you sorry? I mean, I know I'm lapsed, but are you mad that we didn't baptize Jed? We can do it now. Is that what you're wanting? I'm sorry. Can you do a late stage baptism? I guess you can. Do we all need to be baptized? But like, I don't want to have to raise this, like, look, I was raised Catholic.

I don't want to put that pressure on our baby boy. I mean, we probably should have the discussion before raising this. Yeah, yeah. But I was like, you know. Well, I think we'll raise the magnostic. Yeah. And then they can choose later in life. That will help us avoid a thing that comes up very soon after. So yeah, nanny hangs out, rot wheeler hanging around the property all of a sudden, new nanny who's then like, oh,

I bought a dog that's another rot wheeler. So there's two rot wheelers? Well, it's probably the same one, but at that point, we think it's one. Okay, sweet dog. Oh, well the rotties are nice. Yeah, and Damien Jeddon loves the rottweel. Oh, that's great. And look, yes, Jed is five. Yeah. Perfect size and snack for a rotti,

but also not an infant, which is probably the best size and snack for a rotti. So, you know, and if the nanny's like, what's wrong with you? Well can we replace it with another dog? No, because it's not our choice. We, in fact, Gregory Peck cracks the shits and is like, I think you are overstepping

your boundaries as a nanny. And they're like, the nanny's like, I don't think that at all, and I think that your child is much safer with me than with you. Whoa! Okay, calm down. Okay. Relax lady All right, all right. We're raising Jed and Puth. Okay Maybe we fire this nanny. Yeah

Just don't let her alone. That's so rude. I'd be like look, Rottweil is another dog I would have chosen around the five-year-old. Yeah, but if we have a backyard Do we have a backyard? Yeah, we got a huge backyard. We live in a big property. Let's get a horse. If a dog is in the backyard and is only like, you know, around our baby, our toddler Jed, with our supervision. Yeah. And your nanny, you're saying that it's well trained? Yeah, but if the nanny's talking shit.

But then, yeah, again, but then if she starts talking shit, then I'm like, we're firing this nanny. I'd say, put her out on her ass, get a new nanny, get a horse instead of a dog, much safer at a child. Teach the kid respect. Exactly. Because look, a horse, yes, a horse may kick us at any moment in time. It might even bite us.

But it's not gonna maul us. There are horse rules, and if you obey the horse rules, you'll be okay. It's funny that we're stuck on the Rottweiler because the Rottweiler is the only thing out of all of the things that happen in Yeah, the omen that isn't Like the Rottweiler doesn't attack anyone. Everything's fine. Yeah, the Rottweiler is like an angel, a force of good No, the Rottweiler is still bad We're getting rid of Nanny and we're getting rid of, I mean unless you like the third vote Yeah, obviously every Zamooshly in the Zamooshly house out there gets a vote. We should probably get a new nanny. Okay, cool.

And what about the horse? Yeah, where do you stand on horse? I'm fine with the horse. Okay, fabulous, we get a horse. Wonderful. Alright. Then the next thing that happens is we try and go to the nanny's... Lightning McQueen, the horse.

Ka-chow. I'm pretty sure... Ka-chow the horse. Ka-chow the horse. That's better. Beautiful. Ka-chow Zamuchli because we consider the horse our best. Oh, as one of the family, yeah, absolutely.

He's kind of like the fourth dad in a way. We try and go to the nanny's funeral, Damien goes crazy in the car. Well, I mean, the nanny did just, you know. But he's fine until we get close to the church, in which case he goes bananas and gets violent. That's fair, it's a traumatic time. I understand this kid you saw in Hangers Off, you know what? We try and then cheer a little boy up.

Jeddon up, yeah. Jeddon, we're like, Jeddon, we'll go to a safari park. Yeah, well, okay, first off. Why does the giraffe hate you, Jeddon? Well, that's okay, we'll get away from here where the giraffe seems pissed off. I understand this, but are we taking them to a safari park? Yes.

Would you? Would you want to take the kids to a safari park? The kid's upset at the funeral. I'm probably taking it somewhere. We're going to the funeral. Why don't I just stay and pay the respects to the nanny? Bags not. You don't draw. Okay. Alright. I'll stay at the funeral. You're staying at the funeral. We're going to take Jed and... Yeah. Where are you going? Where do you want to go? Maybe an arcade?

I want to go to the zoo. Jackson loves the zoo. I love going to the zoo. See a giraffe. All right Giraffe first and then can we go to the arcade? Yeah we can go to the top zone afterwards. Of course we can. Driving through the Safari Park. Yeah, giraffes fucking pissed off. Wow. Okay, and the vibes are real bad Do you like the giraffes pissed off at Jaden or us? Yes Do you just think the giraffes pissed off like the vibes are just- it's kind of like, you know like when you're around an animal and you can kind of sense like, oh it might attack me.

Yeah, okay. I'm like maybe, I don't know, I'm trying to think of around here. Is it Werribee open range? Yeah, Werribee open range. I'm like, man, what are they doing here? They are pissing off these giraffes. Something shocking. Someone teasing this giraffe? Like, man. These giraffes are real getting back. Then you are like, huh, this is weird. So you decide, uh, we'll just drive through this area. The next part's baboons.

Okay. Yeah. Then baboons get so pissed off and try and get into the car. What? They, like, 40 baboons swarmed your car. 40? 40 baboons? What is a Zeus policy of a man running over a baboon? Well, that's what happens in the omen. Because I might freak out and try and floor it. Fair enough. And try to protect, you know, my other dad, or co-dad, Jack here. Oh, sorry, Joel.

Thank you. Sorry, Jack. And yeah, and baby Jed. And baby Jed. I've been fearing for my life. So I'm mowing down some baboons and where be zoos getting a strongly worded letter? I think that it's absolutely on the zoo.

They shouldn't let the baboons roam loose. I don't know what they were feeding them. Baboons have a bad attitude anyway. Yeah, so they're like jumping on your car and screaming and banging on the windows trying to get in. I'm scared. Jed and also isn't stoked. What kind of car do we want?

Fair enough, I don't know. Do we want like a, like an SUV? Convertible. Yeah. But horns have killed your child. Oh no. Yeah, well I'm trying to think, are we getting like a, what kind of family?

Cause it's gotta be three of us plus the kid. Plus a horse. Plus a horse, oh I got a horse, I got a horse trailer. Yeah. Okay, so we have to have a car that can tow a horse. Yeah. Oh, yeah, the horse would probably hate Jettan too I didn't even consider that Chow's gonna kick shit. Oh shit. Chow probably just run away. Oh, that's so expensive Chow the next day is jump the fence we're like

hmm how high were the fences meant to be? I didn't look into this before getting a horse damn it what are those ditches called in London a ha ha yeah ha ha I'm pretty sure they got ha ha walls okay a horse could get up a ha ha horse has the last laugh when it comes to a ha ha. Fuck. Damn. Alright, well. Do you want me to go find the horse?

Well, I think we're putting out like little notices. Have you seen this horse? Answer to Kachow. Zamuchli. Okay. So I'm guessing we're in some kind of like maybe four wheel drive, like a ute, something like that, because we have like a tow bar, but like, know It's something big enough that can yes carry us the baby or the kid and also a bunch of clothes and like you know Yeah, of course brand, etc. Whatever. Exactly. And also like with a trailer that we can chuck well we could

chuck a challenge The trailer is just an investment. Yeah, we're not gonna get the same money back for buying it It's funny what you're dealing with all of this. I'm just in a church. Thank you. It was sad. All right. So leaving the zoo with a lot of the boom blard on our wonderful car. You've had a terrible time at the zoo.

Yeah. Well, a priest has come up to me at the church and been like, hey, good child, it's the son of Satan, your wife, she's pregnant, and your child is going to kill you and your unborn baby. And you're like, I don't have a wife, I have two other dads, you must be thinking

of someone else. The priest is like, huh? Are you sure? Jack Jackson. So we imp.Preg? Yeah, well you're gonna have to pick who it is because it becomes important. Rock, paper, scissors, see who gets M.Pregs? Paper, scissors, rock!

Okay, I guess I'm getting M.Preg. Zammet went paper, Jackson went scissors, Zammet's M.Preg. I think you're about to take a turn for you, Zammet. Because, we find, so I find out this information, I'm like, what are you, me? That's crazy. Hey, I have some, we have some horrible news when we went to the zoo.

Also some interesting news as an aside personally. Oh, okay. We're gonna be a family of five soon. So you don't find out your, so in the, the way it happens in the movie is Gregory pack finds out his wife's pregnant wife finds out Separately that she's pretty he finds out from her priest. Yeah, she finds out from a doctor The priest is like she has to get an abortion. Okay, she goes to a psych who was like you gotta get an abortion

Yeah, cuz like it's all terrible and then he's like, I don't think you should get an abortion. Yeah. Cause like it's all terrible. And then he's like, I don't think you should get an abortion. She's like, maybe I should get an abortion. It's like, let's be sensible out of this. Which then sets up the scene that I guess we would just head straight to, cause we kind of skipped over some of the things that happens in the movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Where Joel Zammat impregnates, he's on the second story of our beautiful house. Yeah. Setting up some decorations, but he's standing on the ladle. Oh no. Why did you let me do this?

I don't know, dude. I just feel, if I'm Empery, and we have this discussion, you've come, okay, let's say we've diverged after the wonderful time you had at the funeral, and an interesting time we had at an open safari zoo. We come in and we're like, we have some news. Yes, the car needs to be cleaned. There's a lot of baboon blood. So the baboons went very crazy. That's crazy you've told us that because I just got told by the priest that our son's

the Satan. What? Yes. Jaden. What? Jaden. But. Also, Kachow ran away.

Man, that stinks. Kachow ran away. Man, that stinks. Kachow's gone. Also my breasts are feeling quite sore. It's having to be tender all day, dude. Yeah, I've been feeling a bit queasy. I don't know what that's about. In the movie, because Gregory Peck is the only one who knows that Damien's not their actual child, he is cagey about like some of the stuff

that doesn't talk. But we know that boy is in our biological child. Yeah. Well, cause otherwise one of us has to think we had birth. We had birth? Hey, remind me, did I have birth at any point? Dude, I think you had birth. Well, if I'm already, I mean, I guess, yeah, potentially.

Okay. But basically what happens in the omen is the guess, yeah, potentially. Okay. But basically what happens in the Omen is the wife, Catherine. Yeah. I can't remember. So I'm gonna refer to them as Gregory Peck, the actor, and the characters of his wife is Catherine. Can't remember his character's name, can't remember her act in it.

Yeah, that's fine. So she's setting up some decorations or something, or cleaning, and she's on a ladder Yeah, not a high ladder just like a little step But Damien because he's a piece of shit Yeah, he's on his tricycle and he's riding around and she's like, oh darling be careful And then he rides his bike directly into her ladder Yeah, knocking her off the second. Oh, not get her off the ladder

She falls over the banister and then holding onto the banister, and she's like, Damien, help me, and then he's just like, and then she falls and has a miscarriage. And then she spends the rest of the movie in hospital. That's very sad. Well, the thing is, there's the three of us. Yeah.

We're very concerned about all this bad blood and blood, and that you've been, the priest has been like, hey, maybe, The Antichrist movie? I'm like, I'm feeling a bit tender, and you of food aversions and a lot of food cravings. Yeah, interesting. Do you reckon you got impregnated at some point? Maybe.

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improve your bottom line. We're so serious about savings, we've made this ad 20% shorter. That means you get six seconds back. Just enough time to visit Shopify.com slash POS 20. Now that's an efficient ad. Eligibility requirements apply. See Shopify.com slash POS 20 for details. Yeah. Oh, and then we get news after all of this is the priest that told me that our babies, the Antichrist has gone to church and our lightning struck the church and the lightning rod has fallen off the church roof and impaled him where he stood.

Well, that's what happened to Gregory Peck and Catherine. It's not us. The priest is still on the same journey. I understand this. He's still going to get impaled by the lightning rod. Yeah, that's fine. So you went to the funeral. Yeah.

Priest is like, baby is the Antichrist. Yeah. Or Jaden's the Antichrist. Yeah. Jaden, so sorry. Come on. Sorry. I've had a busy day.

Yeah, I get it. I get it. You have baby brain. I got baby brain. Got to clean the car now. It's real bad. Yeah. All right, so the priest will be like Jed, Antichrist. You're like, ah, that's bad. Yeah. I was like, that doesn't sound right, but if it is right, that's bad.

That's bad. And then he's like, also, one of the other drones, I'm pregnant. Uh-huh. And that's bad. Jeddon is going to kill your entire family everybody so I think it's like once the it's something like once Yeah, it's part of a prophecy. I don't okay sure sure sure their lightning happens Kills the priest so you cut so when I wish they the newspaper publish a photo of again I stopped doing it really do so when we can go in a pretty cool way Show when we converge at home. We're like crazy day. It's ours escaped. I don't know where to chair went lost horse We put a notice in the paper to get a new nanny

Yeah, the other one with the rock wheel keeps turning up Yeah, fight her away with a stick like go get out of her house. We killed a lot of baboons. Yeah I should have should have led with that. No, that's okay. Yeah, yeah animals got pissed at the zoo Animals hate our son dude All the us or our car all the trailer kachal was in hard to say I'm already written up a letter to the center the zoo Yeah, don't worry about it. I'm very mad. Hopefully we can at least get our money back. That would be nice. Yeah Yeah, yeah, so that's been our day. Yeah, very tender. Yeah, and you are you gonna hit us What are you gonna hit us with? Well, then I'm like, hey

Our kids may be the Antichrist of the priest that told me that is dead now. Oh, no Well, I mean Killed by God A literal act of God killed them literal act of God killed them. What do you mean? It could also just be an accident, right? Could it just be a coincidence? Yeah, but like, we need insurance policies.

This would definitely count as an act of God. I mean, it just sounds like, what, so it was struck by lightning or what? No! The church was... Have you seen the paper though? Look at this photo of the paper. Jesus, I can't print that, dude. This is a crazy newspaper.

What happened this afternoon? Why do they keep taking photos? I don't think you're allowed to do that. We've been taking photos of recently deceased... Those are crime scene photos. So you're telling us that our child that we've raised is the antifascist? Jaden. Yeah, the baby that we all already know we got handed at the hospital.

Yeah, that was a stroke of luck. But apparently Jaden's bad and... We lost our baby Yeah, anyway, I'm feeling very similar symptoms, yeah Damn, it's really tender. Yeah nipples are on fire. Well, maybe you should go to the doctor Mariolas have grown And then I guess at this point, even though we've converged a little bit it still kinda lines up with what the next thing is

because the priest Holy shit, family of five! We gotta name the kid again Not yet, you don't name the kid until it's born Oh yeah, we gotta name We can have some ideas Yeah, for it off Gro......co...

...mo? GroCoMo GroCoMo! Okay, little baby GroCoMo Okay, beautiful But GroCoMo, don't worry about GroCoMo Okay It's this little cute little bump nickname we're giving it

This is just pillow talk, okay? Yeah We're just lying in our big bed together being like What would you name him? Oh, GroCoMo? Great name I would name him Gro-co-mo as well Little Gro-co-mo

And the best thing about Gro-co-mo is it's gentian neutral Yeah exactly We've got Jedin Grogu And Gro-co-mo Knows middle name given I can... Mandalorian Gro-co-mo Mandalorian

What about just Mando? Mando yeah It sounds nice Grokomo Mando That is nice Grokomo Mando Zamushli I can't deny that that's a beautiful name It's gorgeous Okay so we're sitting in our

Just kill a talk Have we done anything about that news or that priest where he's like, Jeden is the Antichrist? Are we believing this? So what happens at this point is, I guess we're probably not believing it, but then knock on the door, it's a photographer from the fifth birthday party being like, hey, I saw the news of the priest who's to die. I just want to show you some photos I've taken cuz um, huh

And then he reveals that in the first photo that he took of at the party It was was of the nanny. Yes, and there is a dark mark around her neck. That looks like a noose Okay, and then he took a second photo of this priest that I think we were friends with or it's an incidental photo I can't remember. Yeah, and there is a huge cross where like through his right where the beam went okay he was like I thought that that was just maybe just a funny little misprint yeah but then he's gonna say oh sorry the first photo is like a little shadow behind him yeah and then he took a photo later incidentally yeah a couple of days later word that line is still there but it's through him

and they're like well it lines up perfectly with where the pole went and this lines up perfectly with The photo of the I'm still got this newspaper printed these dead bodies Yeah, I've also Have to get to the bottom this because look at this photo and that's a photo of him the photographer with a line straight through His neck. Okay. Well, I understand this but like I was very like you may be superstitious You're looking at things after the event. Yeah, you know you be connecting the dots You know after they already happened at least with these two with your line neck thing We'll see what happens there. I don't know it seems like this Photoshop

Is this the 70s or is it 20s? Swinging 70s Austin Powers is at his peak dude Austin Powers is at his peak dude Austin Powers is at his peak in the 60s or the 90s He's on the downfall He's frozen Austin Powers gets frozen in 1969 and then thawed out in the 90s

Well that's my job, finding Austin Powers I imagine in today's but I guess we could be in the 70s Maybe he's got one of them Say Cheese and Die cameras from the Goosebumps, where it takes a photo of you and shows you how you're gonna die. You taking a photo of us? Take a photo of us. Take a photo of me right now.

Hey, can we get like a family photo? Okay, Jaden. Yeah. And then we take a family photo. Well, if you took a photo. Jaden, kachow. Oh. When will style horse come home?

Okay. See, I don't know. I just, this, this, but yeah, one priest being like, as a family, how are we handling this? One priest is being like, your son's the devil and then he gets killed. There's other guys being like, I don't know, man, maybe my camera can predict the future. But then we tell the cameraman, we're like, oh, that's crazy you brought this to us today because the priest was just telling us that it's the Antichrist. And then Keith, who is the photographer, is like, that actually, okay, well, now you've brought that up. Let's talk about these passages and these news articles.

And basically stuff that's happening around the world mimics a biblical passage from Revelations being like, once this happens and this happens and this happens, it will herald the return of the Antichrist. And some of them are like vague, and even in the movie Gregory Peck being like, once this happens, and this happens, and this happens, it'll herald the return of the Antichrist. And some of them are like vague, and even in the movie Gregory Peck's like, that one, what, no. Well, we see he's providing this, maybe a,

look, a Zamooshly family meeting. Yeah, good idea, Zamooshly family meeting. What do we, do we, Is that kid the Antichrist? And then we open up to Keith being like, we don't even fucking know where this kid came from. And Keith's like My god, okay. Well, let's go back to where we got the kid. All right. Let's see what's going on

Are we doing that cuz like a family meeting. Sorry Keith. Hang on a second What are we saying? We saying we don't we got we got this baby from like a guy what we were like a hospital They gave it to us. It's a hospital in Rome is what we have. Remember our Rome trip? Yeah, I remember the Rome trip was very tragic and then wonderful. We had spaghetti mania. Yeah, we had spaghetti mania. So we go back to Rome. But do we?

Well, I guess like- You go onto the plot of the movie as they did it. We're us. Yeah, we are us. So how are we doing this? If I had a kid that we knew was an orphan, and there was all these weird stuff going around with the kid, and people were like- Well then, you know, fertilise it. Don't just go off to book a trip to Rome without your boys. We knew was an orphan. Yeah, there was all these weird stuff going around with the kid

Well, I mean why would I be in hospital because I am if I am several months pregnant He's with child. I am not going on a ladder. Yeah But you don't know you're pregnant when you're on the ladder. Oh wait. No, maybe you do. Maybe you suspect you're pregnant We suspect you're pregnant. Are you getting his breasts? Are you getting on the ladder then what am I getting in the ladder to do it's like to put like to hang up a Decoration or to clean something I can't remember. I'm a ladder. Okay, so you're scared a lot. You're getting knocked off and I can't remember. Yeah, I'll claim a ladder. Okay, so you're scared of ladders. You're getting knocked off and Yeah, it's got a narrow he's got a broken leg or something. Yeah, just you're still in hospital. That's fine Sweet spoilers related to the movie. No, I think I'll be okay. Okay. I think it's gonna turn out different for me You kill yourself in a wild way, but

Yeah, is Jeddon going to be like ramming you to kill you or does he want to kill the baby? Well no, because he wants to kill all of the parents. Damn it, Jeddon. Bad boy. Okay. Well, if Jeddon has the 666 tattoo, that's pretty much cinching it for me. I'm happy for the Rome trip. Yeah, if Keith is like- And we're like, look, maybe it's a good idea to go speak to you, because basically, we're going to Rome to speak to the people that

gave us Jeddon. Yeah. Okay. So... Because like, we know, it was a nun and a priest that gave us Jeddon. Yeah. Let's go figure out what... Because if people are talking mad shit about our baby, and we work for the fucking government, we probably get free flights. Yeah. So the accident where Jeddon is is gonna ram one of us Yeah, does that happen before or after Keith comes to the door? Uh, it's after okay So that we've gone to Rome pretty straight away. Yeah. Yeah, so Keith I just feel if we're like, maybe maybe you're sitting Yeah, like remember the 666 tattoo on his face. I did think that was weird. I didn't think that was weird.

I mean look, I didn't see the signs going on anymore. Maybe. Oh man, now look, let's check it out. So where's Kachow? I don't know, dude. And like Kachow ran away. The baboons tried to kill us, but maybe they were trying to kill the little Jedi.

I just think that like, if- Baboons are evil, I mean. Baboons are evil, though. If we had the, if we had a baby that we didn't really know anything about that just got handed to us at a hospital when we raised it as our own. The Romans are lovely, aren't they? Giving us babies. But then the baby's going a bit weird and you're like, well I could probably go speak

to find it. And we know no information. We have the resources to go somewhere to find out more about our baby. The government pays me heaps to try to find Austin powers to find awesome doesn't to fight that a coke Yeah, yeah, I won the coke. Yeah, but also we're rich. Hey congratulations to us Exactly coke shouldn't own a baby That's what they said. They said that you can't earn a baby if you just want to put it in the odds Hell reward this man and his family lots of money

We take a cake we take cake I don't take a we do take you don't take cake I don't know this guy, but he's the kind of nation. He's a you One of our friends because he was at the party he's a photographer Okay, I don't even know Keith. I say we leave Jeddam with a babysitter. Which babysitter? Traveling with a baby. He's five, dude.

The nanny? You want to leave it with the nanny? The nanny who keeps going like we fired her. No, we fired that nanny. And she keeps turning up with a rot wheeler. We like go away. We don't want you here. No one else is answering the ad. Are we taking Jeddam? I don't want to take Jeddam, but I mean it's a Zamooshly family meeting. Well what are you gonna do with a five-year-old?

Put him, kind of should do like what they do with a dog. Put him in a kennel? Whoa! Nice. I guess we're taking Jeddon to Rome. Okay, we'll take Jeddon to Rome. We've got to take Jeddon. Also, I mean, can we ear-muff him in this whole conversation? Yeah, I don't want Jeddon hearing any of this.

No, he's, he's, he's, we love you, boy. We love Jeddon. We love Jeddon. Yeah. Your dads love you. You just might be the anti-crime. We'll figure it out, Jeddon. Don't worry about it.

Don't worry about it. We're gonna go to Rome. You were, this is where you were born, we think. Yeah, exactly, we're pretty sure. We had this thing called Spaghetti Mania. Yeah. Okay, and we were doing a spaghetti road trip of Europe. Five years ago, I was once again,

impregned I think. And when that happened, I had major spaghetti cravings. And that's when Jackson was like, well, and yeah, okay, Jackson before this, okay sorry, Joel, before this was his name was Jackson. He had, yes, spaghetti mania. And well, we figured, well, we'll just add one and one. Well, you're in hospital because you got a broken leg so you're not coming anyway. Well if we leave straight away I'm not cleaning the house. Exactly. If Keith comes to us before the accident, he's not good. He's fine

No, Keith doesn't come to the house though You said it when we were like when does it happen? Keith has a conversation with us or before or after? Keith has a conversation with us, but it's not at that Keith doesn't like knock knock knock Yeah, yeah, where are we meeting Keith? Where do we run into Keith? with us or before or after? Keith has a conversation with us but it's not at the... Keith doesn't like knock knock knock, okay? Where are we meeting Keith? Where do we run into Keith? I'm just saying like if there's a conversation about going to Rome, I don't think we're like decorating for Christmas or a birthday.

No, we're going straight to Rome. I don't think I'm cleaning dude. Yeah dude, I think we just gotta go to Rome. Okay, we just go to Rome. Yeah. We're like something's wrong with our kid. We go to Rome, we go meet up with the father and the sister. While we're here, what do we think about doing a little sequel to Spaghetti Mania? Spaghetti Mania 2 more spaghetti. Yeah, dude. I got it on the plane. I got I was reading a magazine about Rome

Yeah, I got Spaghetti Mania again. Okay. I'm also having the same cravings. I think we're gonna get more spaghetti. Okay, so we are We're also having the same cravings. I think we're gonna get more spaghetti. Okay, so we are... Okay, so the three of us, Keith and Jeddon, are going to Rome. Jeddon is the anti- Sorry, I mean, like, we don't know this yet. We've got suspicions.

But Jeddon is the anti-crime. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So we're going to Rome. So we're trying to have a holiday with the anti-crime. Right. Who wants us dead? Wow, what has he done now? Is he trying at all times to kill us? Is he trying at all times to make it an accident? Like what is he kinda doing to us?

I honestly think if we put Jeddon on the plane, the plane plates going down. We crash into the Colosseum. Yeah. But wouldn't that kill Jeddon too? So maybe Jeddon's got to keep us alive at least till we land. Yeah. But then maybe in the airport he yells, BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! And we get put in jail.

Yeah. Or he makes us choke on a little peanut or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or choke on something. Or we choke on spaghetti. Oh, dude. That would be ironic. So look, to jump ahead to Jeddon's, well, Damien's plan. Yeah. He is a baby, so he doesn't ever vocalise this, but

basically he gets Gregory Peck killed by cops. Okay. Mm-hmm. And therefore He seems like an innocent little boy still yeah, and then he gets adopted by the president of the United States of America Right. Okay fabulous. Okay. Okay. So his player us. Yeah, yeah, what are we doing? What did they do with their Jaden Damien? Yeah, well cuz they haven't fired their nanny Catherine the wife is in hospital fresh with a miscarriage and also I care severe bodily harm because she fell from a second story That's not happening to us. I landed on her spine. Yeah, it's like right Does on any of us know when I got a room? I do I would want to go to Rome?

I would like to go to Rome. Yeah, spaghetti mania. We all kind of want to go to Rome. Well, if we're going to take Jedem with us, I just feel like Rome might be our final stop, and that's okay. That is fine. That's just what happens. This is just what we're doing.

Yeah, so I feel we just got to Rome. Cause it's like, we all got a little bit of spaghetti mania, maybe we're curious to see what happens. Okay, so here's probably in the timeline of the omen what actually would happen with knowledge of the first omen knowing that the church wanted this to happen. We get killed in Rome by our evil child. The church takes Damien back into their custody

and then just starts the cycle again of like, we gotta get this kid to someone else. We gotta get this kid adopted. Yeah Does Damien have like powers he doesn't he doesn't have like telekinesis or anything Yeah, but his but like is it the kind of thing where you were in a evil seems to cause very bad things to happen around I'm wondering is like could I be like looking at the leaning tower of Pisa? You know and then Damien gets a little expression on his face, and it no he doesn't do stuff like that It'll be more like you be looking at the Leaning Tower of Pisa, and you've been around Damien too long

And then you're like I should hang myself Okay, it's not like I've been hanging around with that Jaden. Yeah, and again once again going Maybe like Jaden terrible for your mental health to be like to simplify it and put it in terms you'll understand Jackson because I know how much you love this series. Yeah. I stand for everything in it. Kind of like a Horcrux from Harry Potter. Your favorite thing. My favorite franchise. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. Okay. So if I'm hanging around Jett in too much, like if we're going to Rome, that's

a long flight. Yeah. Yeah. That's true. Everyone in that plane is cut. Yeah There's a I Legitimately think something will happen when Jamie Jeddon gets off the plane and everyone else on the plane dies Is this one of those things where it sucks that like three people hung themselves in the toilet? Yeah, okay. This is probably what would happen. We get on the plane Yeah, we strap in we go to strap in Jeden who jumps off the plane runs away. And we're like, no Jeden come back! And the flight attendant's like, please sir the plane's taking off. And we're like, oh boy! And they're like, what boy?

Everyone's here. And then we look out the window and we see Jeden standing like he got out of the plane and he's standing on like the stairs. And then as the plane starts to take away then the engine catches fire in the plane That's the kind of thing that Maybe like I ever go, you know, it's one of those like smaller planes Yeah, as it go out into the tarmac and then climb the stairs. Yeah, and then it's like, you know Oh, I gotta go to the bathroom one of my dad's yeah one of us takes it and the other two get sucked up into the Turbines. Yeah, we're what a little last remaining is like oh, no damn it I think if it was me as the last remaining dad. I would be like a judge. I'm just gonna let you loose

Yeah, I imagine it one of those I just feel how many slice maybe cuz like I I would be worried that Jaden would run away. We have one of those um, you know those kid in a leash things, like the little monkey backpack, like a little clip on tail. I feel that's a, you squat down, unclip it, and then just little tiny shove, and then just be like, go in peace. Good luck brother, when you're the Antichrist,rist, you know, I wish you all the best. Yeah, please remember this kindness I served you. Remember this axe, remember the horse we got you. Obviously I did that so well. But the kindness of a heart doesn't count.

Guys, yeah, and I'm gonna go to Rome and do a solo spaghetti mania. Yeah, I'm not even gonna go talk to the priest tonight. I don't even care, dude. You have my word on that one, okay? Yeah, I'm not even gonna go talk to the priest You have my word on that All right, you can change your name That's fine, there's that nanny that was hovering around us she's got a dog you might Fucking name was And then I'm on the plane. I just got a really far away expression and the person comes up They can't get you a drink. Oh, yeah. Yeah

Coke I love a diet coke. Yeah, I'm just like looking at the blood splatter on the side of the plane We're really just gonna take off Yes, two men die accidents happen Yeah, accidents happen Yeah, two diet coke I think if the plane If I'm in that situation I'll go regular coke I think if I'm in that situation And the plane is still going to take off I'm like, this plane

It's just, this is Extremely stupid of me to get back on the plane You know what I'm thinking about? Rum up that coke Yeah, you know what? Hold the coke Just rum? I'm extremely stupid of me to get back on the plane. I'm thinking about rum up that coke. Yeah. You know what, hold the coke. Yeah, just give me- Just rum?

Shots. Rum. Rum this boy up. I, yeah. I'm looking outside at my boy, Jaden, you can see him at the window. He's not left. What I'm thinking is I'm about to die.

Yeah. Yeah, I- And the fact that we haven't, like the plane just sucked up two of its passengers and we didn't even seem to turn the plane just sucked up two of its passengers I think this might be the last Guess spaghetti mania to more spaghetti Act of kindness, you know, we know it yeah

Probably should have real it. I'm gonna walk just back into the airport And give it up on the trip because I mean like, you What's my word worth to the Antichrist? Yeah, well, that's the problem with the Antichrist They're not like they're not gonna cut any deals because they don't care. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm on measly human life Yeah, I made a mistake We're all gonna pay the price you have any spaghetti is like a dinner thing that I could have now? No sir, we've only got dirt Are you a demon? What? Are you?

Is this one of them devil flights? Oh yeah I think I've misunderstood the powers my son had If I'm honest I thought he just had like an aura of evil, but he's made you some dirt. I guess it is a worse punishment to die on a plane after eating the dirt. I guess I don't have to eat the dirt. No, you don't have to eat the dirt.

I'll just be hungry. Yeah. So you probably should eat the dirt. Yeah, you eat the dirt. Okay. With a fork. Like half a spoon? No, we've only got forks. But that doesn't, but doesn't the dirt doesn't, I don't want to eat the dirt. Yeah, yeah, okay

No, we've only got forks, but that's it but doesn't the dirt doesn't I don't want to eat the dirt obviously But it doesn't stay on the tines of the fall. Yeah, it's easier to eat the dirt Well, then it would be a punishment Well now it's mud Pouring some water on it. And now it's mud. Yes. Then the plane starts moving, but as the engine turns on, more blood spatters out the back. Guess there's still bits of them in there. Yeah, I guess that makes sense.

There's two guys, two whole men. Whole guys get chewed up by the... Love of my life. Time to slurp up my mud and say my prayers I guess by Jettan your budget he stills still just looking he's starting to smile which is not a good first time yeah let's get child okay catch our whole yeah I used to think what he was a baby and he never laughed and there was a problem I guess it all makes sense now. Now he's smiling because his dad's dead.

His dad's about to die in the sky. He's lost dad. I wonder if I'm gonna die and take off for landing. Yeah, huh. Don't tell me. I don't wanna know. Yeah, I don't wanna know. I'm just gonna sit here and enjoy my mud. Yeah. Oh, God.

Oh, no! I'm getting dysentery from the mud! The plane's gonna be fine! I'm gonna shit myself to death! Oh, no! Oh, no. Yeah. From the mud the plane's gonna be fine. I'm gonna shit myself to death You jetton Kroger's I curse you Well, it's hard to raise him Stacked against him. Yeah, it feels really, it's stacked against us. Yeah. Like, there's a lot of stuff there, there's a lot of moving parts that you feel that aren't quite moving.

You're not really kind of, you know, you can't see what's there. There's a lot of hurdles you can accidentally hit that because they've got a lot going on in their family, they miss some of them, but it's like, oh, if things were better, it still would have been bad. Cause basically what happens is, Catherine gets thrown out of the hospital window by the nanny that we hate

She just falls through the roof of an ambulance and the doors open and she's dead Like whoa crazy way to commit suicide. Yeah Gregory back gets to well because she, cause she jumps out of a window. Yeah sure. She just happens to land on the ambulance. Yeah, tossing the back of her head. Yes. This is crazy.

Yeah damn. Put it in. Gregory Peck makes it to Rome, goes to meet the people that gave him Damien, and they're like, yeah everyone that did that is dead cause after you left the hospital, the hospital caught fire and there was no The medical records didn't survive except for this priest who only got half burnt, but he's mute and blind. Yeah Like help me I need to know what's going on and then he directs to a graveyard

Which then has the corpse of a jackal yeah the corpse of a baby with a caved in skull which Because that was our normal baby. Yeah, and then we get attacked by rottweilers. Okay, then we go out Then we like fuck. I guess this is the Antichrist. Yeah, because the jackal yeah well, then Keith is like we you've got to kill that baby. And he's like, I don't think I can kill the baby. And then Keith's head gets cut off by a truck crashing and blasts him out. Oh, from the photo.

Yeah. And then he goes to see a guy who's like, here's the seven knives you've got to do, but you've got to kill the baby on sacred land. But it's not a baby, it's a toddler. We don't get this, we're dead. We're dead, baby. It's not a toddler, it's a child, he's five I guess. He's, look, that's in my opinion what happened to Gregory Peck. It did not happen to us. No, but then I think we kind of saved the world anyway because basically what happens is, Gregory Peck gets caught.

We're dead on a plane my dude! He's slept down, mod! How are we saving the world? Well we've saved it because we haven't put Damien in the spot where Damien needs to be. We've left him at the airport. Yeah. Because politics is a thing that it's like the Antichrist will rise to power through politics. And Gregory Peck tries to kill Damien but then gets killed by cops because they burst in on him about to stab a child. And then I put down the knife and he's like, no! And then they just open fire.

And then Damien gets adopted by the president. How does that happen? Because they get a state funeral because Gregory Peck is like the ambassador for, like he's a big weak politician. He's already in the politics. Yeah. Which is why he's chosen in the first place

to get given the baby. Here's what I think happens, and maybe it's just as bad, is that Diet Coke are like, wow. Oh no, we made the devil the face of Diet Coke! Yeah, well, yeah, little Jeddon, without his three dads, get picked up by the corporation Coke. Y'all looking out the window as the Coke truck pulls up next to Jeddon. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! Banging on the window, it's like that's eating Breaking Bad. The coke truck pulls up next to Jaden. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, the face of coke, and with coke's vast wealth and power, gets him to the spot at

the right time. I guess so. Yeah, president, I guess. Yeah, how would we raise the devil? The same as the omen, but more wrong, but still gets the same spot. I guess so, yeah. I think you can take similar boxes. You could become the president by being the face of coke.

That's a fine place to start. Your presidential journey. Donald Trump became the president for being the face of being a fuckwit. Yeah, that's true Ronald Reagan was in that movie with an ape Exactly. So yeah people already know that dead and exist. Yeah, I'm so goes to whatever it's called bedtime for bozos bedtime for Beza Jeff so sleepy. Uh, bedtime for Bozo, but then the sequel,

I don't think has Reagan in it. Oh, that's sad. Aw. That's really sad. You know another chimp movie? I don't know. Yeah, I don't know, dude. Well, yes, I guess, yeah, with Jeddon as the spokesbaby,

or child, for Coke, he's basically put in every, you know, household in America and the rest of the world. he becomes very well known. He's very charismatic Yeah, everybody loves diet coke. Yeah, I was like, but it doesn't matter for us. We're dead. Yeah, you were churned up like Yeah, we didn't notice you had time to come to terms with what was about to happen To keep awesome time You're not crying anymore. Yeah, I've come to terms. That's fine.

That's fine. Got to acceptance so quick. Well, we fucked it. And maybe it's hard to unfuck the situation. Maybe if the Antichrist is on Earth, it's too late. Certainly it's a toll on her for the three boys, for the Zimushli household. Well, on that note, I've been Joel. I've been Jackson. I've been Jackson.

I've also been Joel. And hey, if the omen happens to you, good luck. We couldn't figure it out. We couldn't figure it out. What hope do you have? Yeah. It feels a lot of as if it's almost like a predetermined, fighting a prophecy. And I guess that's the hard thing.

Yeah, it's hard to fight a prophecy. It's the tricky thing to do. If I were the destination though, I'd be fine. You'd body it. I know. Just don't get hit by like a fighter prophecy. It's a tricky thing to do. Final destination though, I would just, I'd be fine. You'd body it. I know. I know. Just don't get hit by like a fucking spaghetti. Slip on spaghetti and get my head cut in half by a ladder.

That's a dumb way to die. I would just not have that happen to me. Cut in half by a ladder? You'd slip on spaghetti? Yeah, that's what happens in Final Destination too. But that's a story for another time listeners. Goodbye! time listeners goodbye! improve your bottom line. We're so serious about savings, we've made this ad 20% shorter. That means you get six seconds back.

Just enough time to visit Shopify.com slash POS 20. Now that's an efficient ad. Eligibility requirements apply. See Shopify.com slash POS 20 for details. Hello, Zamet here, one of the Joles from Middling to OK podcast Plumbing the Death Star, not a Star Wars podcast. While my two effervescent co-hosts gallivant around the UK, I'm back here in Melbourne preparing for the arrival of our firstborn. But I'm not here to tell you about that. I'm here to tell you about a wonderful podcast festival that is happening in October. The Cheerful Earful Podcast Festival. That's right. We're a part of it. On the 4th October at 8.30pm at Stupid Old Studios,

I'll be joined by my very jet lag co-host for our last live Plumbing the Death Star show for a bit. Maybe. It's hard to say. What with the upcoming birth of our... Anyway, you can grab tickets at cheerfulearful.podlifeevents.com and there you can check out all the assortment of delectable comedy podcasts on offer. That's cheerfulearful.podlifeevents.com, a festival of funny podcasts going for 12 days across two continents,

here in Australia, that's October the 4th to the 6th, and across that big pond over in the UK, that's the 12th to the 20th. It's all your favourite funny podcasts, all in one place. Plus, we'll also be there. Crazy. So once again, that's cheerfuleatful.podlifeevents.com. I love you.